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#but this dynamic is funny to me.
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Pyrrha: *Staring at Jaune* The things I want to do to that man ... Are not in the Bible ...
Weiss: *Glaring at Jaune* The things I want to do to that man are against the Geneva Conventions.
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phantomrose96 · 11 months
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Thinking about Edward Elric as the Amestrian Military's specialest little unfireable boy
State alchemists can be fired for underperforming. We know this up front from the likes of Shou Tucker. And this makes a ton of sense from the homunculi's standpoint since the state alchemists are sacrifice candidates, and the homunculi would want to cull the weakest candidates and focus only on cultivating the strongest ones who stand the best chance of opening the portal.
........Then there's Edward. Who's already opened the portal.
There's no need to cultivate him. No gamble taken on whether he's good enough to open the portal. He passed the final test already. Graduated 4 semesters early.
And as such, has a free pass to do Absolute Fuck All.
And I'm imagining how funny this is from like an outside perspective.
Some newish state alchemist who'd only ever read up on the stories of Edward Elric, ready and excited to start their career of being paid handsomely with endless freedom to research and travel and do anything they want in the pursuit of science... surprised and confused to find themselves put on probation their first month for things like "ignoring orders." Which is, as best they had thought, a famous Edward Elric pastime.
Roy showing a slight bit of stress about his yearly state alchemist report, and Ed just snorting and rolling his eyes at Roy because every year HE just hastily does his on the train ride over (canon in the manga, a travesty it was left out of the anime) and it gets rubber stamped. Ed not realizing that other alchemists' reports get genuinely scrutinized and torn apart while Ed is free to turn in whatever absolute bullshit he thinks of 36 hours ahead of time. One year his report was about whether alchemy could be done via dance (conclusion: no it can't) and no one cared. Roy WANTS to tell Ed there's some kind of unknown favoritism around Ed making him literally bullet-proof but Roy has no way to phrase this that doesn't sound like he's just in denial and mad at how good Ed's train-reports are.
Guy from the Internal Amestrian Affairs sector who's responsible for auditing other internal military personel for any suspicious activity hitting about 1 million red flags for Edward Elric, issuing a STRONG and URGENT recommendation to suspend the alchemist pending further investigation into things like "literal bunk-buddies with two members of the Xingese royalty (enemy nation)" and "spent $10,000,000 of his stipend on a librarian to make her re-copy (what he seemed to interpret as?) military records in some extremely transparent effort to unearth state secrets (it was a recipe book but he was literally asking her about state secrets)" and "literally has never once obeyed an order, ever, not even once in his career, and is on public record having said 'I do not care about the goals and protections of the Amestrian Military. I am in fact only pursuing my own interests several of which are diametrically opposed to the safety and well-being of the governing body of Amestris'"
The issued recommendation is intercepted before it even reaches its intended desk. President Bradley himself has taken issue with it and denies it before a single set of eyes has seen it. The President's veto stamp is a terrifying hammer, used rarely, and it is now sitting on the auditor's desk.
The auditor sleeps with one eye open from then on out.
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mountainshroom · 7 months
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Recent hazbin sketches :) just a reluctant stepdad and his overenthusiastic daughter bonding
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majunju · 5 months
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bunny suit
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raycatzdraws · 5 months
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The true botw shrine experience. I don't think Four approves!
The full comic page and some colorful Fours can be found under the read more!
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A meme redraw based on something I did in a playthrough lol. Out of arrows? Throw your sword!
I love Four so much aaAA
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guinevereslancelot · 2 years
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first base is wound tending second base is hand touching
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FNAF movie Mike isn’t wrong, but he’s not right either..
Based off @/Tanijrou post on twitter
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ohposhers · 2 months
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espio let silver hug him once and silver took that as an invitation to forget personal space is a thing people like to have <3 based off of that one comic panel if you know you know wink wonk
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oobbbear · 2 months
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Them when they do this
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doctorsiren · 2 months
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can’t stop thinking about mob growing up 🥺
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maiko-coy · 6 months
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Sneak peek at pre-HOJ arc of Missed Chances AU and their characters!
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mr-malumm · 2 months
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This was for 4th of july hehehehehhee
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 5 months
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Lan Wangji Goes To Lotus Pier AU: Part 5: Flip Slip.
(Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 4.5)
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meruz · 9 months
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showing my brother stuff on my phone that he has no interest in or understanding of
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duckysprouts · 1 year
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book jaime lannister is the funniest boy because from birth he’s constructed a grand narrative in his mind that he is the perfect knight to his sister-wife’s perfect maiden, a relationship that exists solely to fuel their mutual narcissism and help him cope with his chronic identity crisis/trauma, only to see a buff girl naked for the first time and come to the subconscious realization that it’s actually HIM who is the maiden to brienne’s knight and proceeds to spend the rest of their trip using preschool tactics of annoying her to death so that she can notice him and sweep him off his feet (it works)
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abstractfrog · 5 months
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SILVER BLAZE PART THREE - happy jonkday everyone. one of these days i'll draw a scene that doesn't take place at night
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