#but this and a handful of other videos I made when Endgame and Infinity War were out

[winter-clue-heart]

⚠️ Language Warning ⚠️

[twinhood-2dot0]

My Turn Ons (in fiction) aka Attack On Titan/Chainsaw Man obsessive appreciation post

I started writing this post about what I liked to see in works of fiction, but uhhhh it quickly devolved into just praising every aspect of those previously mentioned mangas. Look I swear I like more than these two, they just seem to hit every single one of my spots??? These are the first works of fiction I really obsess over because of the plot and the storytelling and not just characters and worldbuilding. Like, most of my favourite franchises are mostly because of characters. DC, Rick Riordan stuff, one certain novel series that feels fills me with rage just thinking about, you know the one, you get the point. Also, I'm writing this while watching a video overanalysing Attack On Titan story arcs :P. Okay, that's it for my explanation for why this turned into a post singing praises, the rest is what I started writing and am too lazy to edit the intro for.

I spend a lot of time on TVTropes. And significantly more time obsessing over the new work of fiction that I just discovered and fell absolutely in love with. And recently, I’ve found out a few things that make anything instantly a favorite for me. Lemme list them in no particular order.

1.Death. Obviously. You probably saw that coming from lightyears away. I really love works of fiction that do not shy away from killing off fan favorites and well established characters unceremoniously. Examples include Attack On Titan, Chainsaw Man, The Walking Dead, Avengers: Infinity War to a lesser extent because of the events of Endgame, The Suicide Squad, the Arkham Series, I mean uhhh do games count, since Batman has died at least like 20 times by my hand and other characters too because I just wanted to see them die? Anyways, the Arkham series also has a huge canon death count of huge characters.

2. Sudden Tonal Shift. I love when stories start off as goofy and comedic and suddenly shift to dark and depressing in a matter of seconds. Examples include Chainsaw Man, Attack On Titan (yeahh, it’s kind of spoiling it, but dw, you won’t see it coming), AoT to a lesser extent because it is one tone throughout, but shifts how it is approached suddenly and quite often, and Your Name.

3. Female and LGBTQ+ characters. I… don’t really know how to explain this. Basically uhhh I want every single character treated the exact same way. Idk how to really explain it, so lemme use some examples. I feel like Attack On Titan has the best female and LGBTQ characters. Okay, okay, I know I say that AoT is like the best work of fiction ever created a crap ton, but really, I’ve yet to see anything that did female characters soooo well. One of the few things that made me despise anime is their female characters. Let’s see here. Death Note, there is one female character in the main cast and her whole purpose is… fawning over the main character. There is literally nothing else that she does. And another manga that I had the displeasure of reading as a kid is Fairy Tail. It’s led by a female character, which you might think is a good thing but… she’s so sexualised like oml like wtf the solution to every problem is not “sex appeal”. I’m not even joking, the phrase “sex appeal” is probably more used than “Fairy Tail”, and My Hero Academia is good enough ig? They have pretty strong female characters but not very well written imo, and, well, this character’s outfit exists.

Also yikes I found this.

She’s a minor, for god’s sake. There are quite a few more characters with questionable outfits and questionable writing but I don’t want this post to get gigantic. To be clear, I am not singling out just a select few mangas and calling the whole industry sexist. There are a lot of stories with strong women who aren’t overly sexualised, but shounen is pretty much the most popular demographic, written by mostly men aimed for adolescent boys, so that lends itself to these issues (Also, sidenote, I have no idea where the line between shounen and seinen is. I’ve read just one seinen, Parasyte: The Maxim, and I’ve read shounen like Attack On Titan, Chainsaw Man, and Fire Punch, and that felt like they had more sexual themes and nearly as much gore and violence?).

So why do I like Attack On Titan’s female characters? The story never really concerns itself with gender. It is pretty much true equality, and it actually has female characters that contribute so much to the plot and stand on their own apart from the main character (don’t you dare say Mikasa, that’s a can of worms you do not wanna open even among the piles of worms that are all my posts.). Also, look at the art of the characters.

(Actually, I prefer their manga art. Much more androgynous. As perfect as the anime is, I hate that they made them female. I loved the fact that their gender was up to the reader's interpretation in the manga. Hajime Isayama even got mad at the translators for using female pronouns for them in the English translation.)

Okay, not exactly the best picture, but I just loved that panel so much :P.

Also they are explicitly called male in the manga and then female in the anime?

Those are just a few examples, but no one has very gendered features in the main cast. It’s a thing I noticed recently, but no one grows a beard??? And so many male characters have long hair so even that’s not a distinction you could make. Anyways, my point is, there is no distinction. Strong women fighting against male domination is all well and good but like, I want stories like these more, where women are equals. And the one (maybe two) lesbian characters are so like natural too.

Chainsaw Man also does this surprisingly well. The main character, Denji, is a certified pervert.

A few panels from the first few chapters.

So safe to say, I wasn’t expecting great female characters. And I was proven wrong. I don’t want to give away too much, but it has some very top tier female characters. Some western examples include DC, obviously, with Batgirl being my absolute favourite, and characters like Harper Row, Cassandra Cain and Stephanie Brown also being some of my favourites. American comics generally don’t have a great reputation when it comes to female characters, like look at some of the costumes from older comics

I started reading Batgirl: A Celebration of 50 Years and holy hell, did men not know how to write women at all, like what in the actual hell is this

Down to her "pretty toes"??? Seriously?

Ah yes, women put on makeup while fighting.

Ah yes, women apply makeup while fighting. But I’m glad to see how far DC has come, with how much of a badass she is now. I’m not going to get into novels, there are a crap ton of novels I could cite for having good female characters, and a lot of being written by women too.

4. What the F did I just read. I like dark humor and dark stuff in general. So I love reading stuff that make me just pause and take in what I just read. All of Tatsuki Fujimoto's works (Chainsaw Man, Fire Punch, Goodbye, Eri, Little Sister's Elder Sister) get more and more deranged than the last, and The Boys too get very insane, and James Gunn stuff also tend to be uhhh weird, to say the least.

5. Extremely careful storytelling..? idk what to call it. Basically, a combination of the extreme opposite of writing by the seat of their pants, an extreme version of Chekhov's gun, and a good mystery. See, every story has it's twists and turns, but what I love is when there's a ton of foreshadowing and one that makes you go "OMG THE CLUES WERE THERE ALL ALONG, HOW DID I NOT NOTICE ANYTHING WHAT THE HELL" on a rewatch, and stories where every single moment and small detail contributes hugely to the plot. I've experienced the story of Attack On Titan three times... kinda? I kinda simultaneously read and watched Attack on Titan the first time, like reading season 1 then watching a few episodes, reading a bit, then watching, you get the point, then I went back and watched the episodes that I read and read the episodes that I watched and I'm currently rewatching it all because the last season came out like an year ago??? MAPPA takes on too much work and then make their workers suffer, anyways, not a can of worms I wanna open now. Anyways, what I'm saying is, every single detail is thought out and have some kinda symbolism or foreshadowing. Damn, I'm trying to find a meme, but I can't, but it's basically someone getting mad with the text saying something like "When your friends don't pay attention to the flowers and the birds (it is foreshadowing)".

Also, I'm also rewatching Chainsaw Man... after finishing watching and reading it less than a month ago, and most of the words spoken take on a new meaning after finishing it.

:P I'm sorry, idk any western media that has done this so well, so these are the only two examples you get.

6. Music. I can't believe I didn't remember this till now. I don't think I need to elaborate again? I've written like three posts about this already. That said, nothing even compares to Attack On Titan.

Yeah that's all I can think of :P. I'm about 14 hours late but meh.

[lokitvsource]

‘Loki’ star Tom Hiddleston: ‘I was very engaged with the idea of breaking Loki open’

Tom Hiddleston first appeared as Loki in 2011’s “Thor,” but the God of Mischief made a bigger splash, burdened with glorious purpose and all, in 2012’s “The Avengers,” which marks its 10th anniversary on May 4 and has the “Loki” star feeling “very old, basically.”

“I can’t believe 10 years has gone by so fast,” Hiddleston tells Gold Derby (watch the exclusive video interview above). “Amazed, surprised, delighted that I’m still playing the character. I have loved playing this character in every iteration. Loki seems to contain so much breadth and depth, so many surprises for me, for the audience. It’s an honor to have played him for the length of time that I had. Loki’s an ancient character, been around a long time, will be around a lot longer than me. It feels great.”

There have been multiple times when it seemed like the actor was done playing Loki. The fan favorite was supposed to die in “Thor: The Dark World” (2013) until test audiences refused to believe Loki was dead, and he did die in the opening minutes of “Avengers: Infinity War” (2018) at the hands of Thanos (Josh Brolin), completing an arc from big bad to antihero. But the time heist in “Avengers: Endgame” (2019) presented another chance to bring Loki back to life after he makes off with the Tesseract during the Battle of New York, creating a branched timeline off the Sacred Timeline. The Loki of “Loki,” of course, is not the same one who sacrificed himself for Thor (Chris Hemsworth) in “Infinity War” — having made peace with himself and his anger toward his adoptive family — but the 2012 version, a charmingly narcissistic “puny god” who craved power above all else.

Revisiting the unredeemed Loki and approaching him in a new way excited the Emmy nominee. “I was very engaged with the idea of breaking Loki open,” Hiddleston says. “Any questions around identity I’ve always found interesting — how we define ourselves to ourselves, the context of the stories we tell about ourselves to other people in order to find meaning in the world. And in so many ways the series was about integrating the disparate fragments of the many selves that Loki is. I think that’s a really universal experience. I think all human beings have to constantly integrate the fragments of who we are to a whole and make sense of that. So the idea of doing that with Loki just seemed a thrilling prospect. He’s the archetypal trickster, the transgressive, the boundary-crosser, the shapeshifter, somebody so expert at changing shape. And so the question we had in our minds was, who is he really? Who is Loki? What makes Loki Loki?”

After getting captured by the Time Variance Authority, Loki is forced to confront his past, future (and future death), other Loki variants (Alligator Loki FTW), and someone who might know him better than he knows himself, Agent Mobius (Owen Wilson). “The great conceit of the TVA is that putting Loki inside this institution strips him of everything that’s familiar — Thor, Odin, Asgard, his magical power, his clothing. And by taking everything away, Loki is challenged to reveal something about what remains — or we were challenged to find what remains of Loki and what the new journey is,” Hiddleston continues, adding that director Kate Herron had “the most wonderful take” on Loki’s Season 1 arc. “When I met her for the first time, within five minutes, I think I asked her what do you think the series is about and she said, ‘I think it’s about acceptance, permission and love.’ And I thought, ‘She gets it!'”

By the end of the first season, Loki is a lot different from the entitled agent of chaos he was at the start — and is also in a different timeline after Sylvie (Sophia Di Martino) killed He Who Remains (Jonathan Majors) and opened the multiverse. While we have to wait and see what Season 2 brings, another Asgardian adventure is coming first. “Thor: Love and Thunder,” the trailer for which dropped last week, opens July 8 and will be the first “Thor” film in which Hiddleston — as far as everyone knows right now — does not appear as Loki. Or does he?

“At this point, I’ve learned to live with the question,” Hiddleston teases. “Loki might pop up. Loki has range. Loki can be Matt Damon, he can be Richard E. Grant, he can be Alligator Loki. I’m not placing any bets, I’ll say that, but it does look fantastic.”

[moku-youbi]

Starker plot bunny

So I've been having all these fandomy dreams lately. And like, don't get me wrong, it's sort of awesome, because they're like full-length fanfics playing out and it's just great. But on the other hand, some of them are for ships I don't even ship? And I'm like I don't even go here, but this is really good?? And maybe I should write it?

Like this Starker dream I had where hand-wavey magic happens with Dr. Strange and Peter at some future point. Where Dr. Strange feels like there's something really shady going on with Peter, but can also tell that HE, himself cast whatever spell is causing it, so he's not going to poke at it. But then Peter made a wish to go back in time and somehow forced Strange to do it? Look, it was a dream, okay. I'd have to work on that part of it. Because I'm actually on planing on writing this *facepalm*

But Peter ends up transmigrating back before Endgame/Infinity War. He doesn't know HOW, but he's going to fix everything, and he's got all the time in the world to figure it out, because it turns out Strange's spell permeates time and space, so everyone still has forgotten him.

So he still it starts doing the Spider-Man thing, although with far more sophistication than his original sweats and goggles, with all the knowledge of Stark's technology from the future. Of course he doesn't have access to all of that but he is able to slip around the edges of society finding bits and pieces of what he needs to construct his suits. Also he obviously isn't posting about himself on YouTube this time around (like, I could see him doing it just for the ad revenue but he has no identity in universe, so how's he gonna get paid??)

Stark still takes an interest in trying to figure out who this person is but is particularly frustrated when he can't find any sort of trail. Peter is way more savvy with age, aware of surveillance and staying under the radar so has not to draw attention to himself. He's having a difficult enough time as someone who is in a 14-year-old body with no family or friends, no identity, trying to earn enough money to get by getting paid under the table for various jobs. The last thing he needs is someone whether the police or shield or whoever noticing what this kid is getting up to and/or knowing Spider-Man's identity.

For Stark that means never being able to catch the transition from Peter to Spider-Man anywhere on video, so he has no visual of Peter to go from, he's also tried showing up at Spider-Man's battle scenes after the fact gathering what clues he can. Partial fingerprints from torn gloves get him nowhere. He does find DNA that eventually leads him to Ben Parker as the only living relative to him, and a close one at that. However there are no records of any other member of that family living. He considers that it could be Ben's brother faking his death, but the DNA would indicate a nephew, and his only brother died never having children.

It's a mystery that is really driving Stark insane. What started as curiosity and wanting to reach out to Spidey to see if he's interested in joining The Avengers has now turned into a bit of an obsession. (Especially since spidey always manages to disappear when Stark tries to confront him with Iron Man) Part of this is due to how Strange's spell works. In my dream, the way I conceived of it is that it doesn't actually erase memories or physical evidence of Peter, it just makes everyone forget he was there in the first place. Like, memories with him are still there, but the mind just slips over the parts with Peter. Photos of him are still there, but it's a sort of Westworld-esque "that doesn't look like anything to me" reaction. They just don't see all the places where he is or was in their lives.

And we all know Tony will not leave shit alone, this is like an itch in his brain. So the spell itself is actually fuelling Tony's obsession. It's a puzzle he needs to understand. The more someone tries to focus on those gaps, however, the more the spell fights back. So Tony is getting these awful headaches and occasionally reality goes all blurry, and he keeps getting what he thinks are hallucinations but are actually memories overlaying the gaps in reality that the spell has caused.

This is where the dream got to weird so that when I write it I'll have to figure out my own solution. Because in the dream Tony and Peter had been lovers in universe before Tony's death, and one of the biggest clues was him finding love letters they'd exchanged, and I'm just not feeling that at all. Peter would have been way too young for Stark to even consider it, and I don't want him cheating on Pepper, and I am trying to keep the original timeline close to canon.

So IDK how exactly Tony figures it out, which is one of the bigger hurdles on face when I actually start this fic. I think it has to come to a head when Spider-Man is forced to approach Iron Man for help with some mission and being in that close proximity, hearing Spider-Man's voice, his jokes, something familiar about the way he talks and moves is going to cause a serious mental break for Tony at the worst possible time.

Of course Spidey saves him and is sort of frantically checking that Tony is okay after the fact crying and babbling about how Tony can't die again about how Peter needs him, about how the world needs him, just losing his shit. Tony can hear the cracking of his voice, can tell how young he sounds now when he's not affecting a deeper register. And he's also picking up on all the little clues and what Peter is saying that just confirm his suspicions that somehow Tony should know him. Pulls off his mask, and sees his face, and doesn't know where the name comes from, but whispers, "Peter?"

Anyway, I woke before it could entirely be resolved. But I imagine with Tony in his corner, Peter explains as much as he can about what he knows is coming and the two of them start working together to prevent Thanos from ever having access to the various stones. And over the course of it falling in love. I mean Peter was pretty much already there, but Stark is having a hell of a time with it. He knows intellectually that Peter is an adult and really tries to acknowledge that and treat Peter with the respect he deserves, but he also has trouble getting past what Peter looks like in his teenage body. And Peter struggles with it knowing that if they do this, Tony is never going to reconcile with Pepper and Morgan isn't going to be born, which is a lot of angst I'm not prepared for right now. IDK. Maybe I could go for some sort of poly ending, or Pepper being a surrogate and coparent??*shrugs* (like I said, I don't go here--im all about the Spideypool, and I love Tony/Pepper, what was my brain on??)

Also trying to decide where to set this in the timeline of the past, because I really want to save Ben, but it fits better for the storyline if he comes back post Civil War and Homecoming. Because then Stark has memories of Peter that have been affected by the spell.

So, obviously it needs workshopping, if anyone wants to help, lol.

[protect-anthony-edward-stark]

Did they watch the same movies as us..? 🤦‍♀️

First, how can they blame Tony for not picking up the phone? After all that happened in Civil War?

- tony found out that his parents were murdered, and saw them die on video in front of him.

- he found out that his friend in whom he trusted knew about it, didn't tell him, and continued to lie.

- he ended up being betean with such hatred that they almost killed him, when they were already the ones who had just hurt him.

- and they leave him alone there with a dysfunctional armor, physically and psychologically hurt.

Plus, Tony was obviously going to call, (otherwise why would he take the phone with him everywhere he went, even when he was just going for a jog with Pepper?)

He just took a few seconds before calling the man who broke him (and never even apologized) Because yes, feelings exist..

And another thing, when will they understand that Tony signed the Accords to protect people? It was requested by 117 countries. Tony listened to them, and understood them. (he didn't feel above them or above the laws, unlike team cap.)

He did what he had to do, even if he was not really happy about it either, to protect the population from collateral damage.

And how can they compare Tony to Hydra.. If anyone here had anything to do with hydra, I'll just point out that Wanda actually joined them deliberately at one point. (not to mention that she also joined ultron and unleashed the hulk on a city..) And in order to "destroy", when Tony just did everything to "protect."

Finally.. when will they stop blaming his ego?? What ego? All I see is a broken man, who hates himself, blames himself for everything, and always puts others before himself without ever receiving anything in return.

Since I saw a lot of these antis these days.. here is a little reminder that

Tony Stark is absolutly NOT a villain ⬇️

IRON MAN 1: the first thing he notices when he's captured by terrorists is that they have his weapons and the harm they can do with them. And he prefers to be tortured and die than to do what they want. When he return to the US after months of capture, the first thing he does is to announce that he shut down stark industries because it was more important for him than his health. Then he take responsabity for what Stane did, risks his life to save everyone, and says he's rather DIE than not do that. And, he sacrifice himself to prevent Stane from using his suit.

IRON MAN 2: his arc reactor kills him and using the suit accelerates his poisoning but he continues to help people. he's going to die but he thinks of others, he gives his company to pepper, his collections to kids, and organizes the stark expo, to help science one last time. he does everything to keep his armors and prevent it from falling into the wrong hands. and at the end he goes at the expo with a new arc reactor and without a test. not knowing the risk. to get there faster and save everyone.

AVENGERS: he had been rejected from the avengers project but when the shield needs him he comes to help. (and he researches their purpose to make sure he's not helping the wrong people.) + he's the one who doesn't treat banner like a monster when everyone else did. he sacrifices himself again, sending the nuke into the wormhole. and the first thing he does after the battle of NY, is to transform his tower into the Avengers tower (with personalized floors for each of them) to give them a home and a family, and create organizations to protect people.

IRON MAN 3: he saw the aliens and he knows something is going to happen. he sacrifices his health, spending day and night without sleep, making new suits, to protect his loved ones and everyone. when his house exploded he save pepper and tells her to save maya instead of him. he has ptsd, anxiety attacks, nightmares, but never stops fighting, and when the mandarin arrives he goes to stop him. + he doesn't hesitate to remove his arc reactor and suffers to save the kid who bullied harley.

AVENGERS 2: wanda shows him a traumatic vision, his biggest fear, all his fiends dead. he knows that they will not be strong enough alone and wants to stop that from coming true, so he creates ultron/vision. he blame himself and always think he didn't do enough. he says that is the avengers die, he'd rather die with them. he couldn't bear to outlive them, and he sacrifices himself again in sokovia by going under the flying city and blowing it up.

CIVIL WAR: he listens to the 117 countries, he want everyone to be safe and sign the accords to prevent collateral damage. he save wanda bucky steve from jail, offer medical care for bucky and protect wanda from blame. (and he asks vision to stay with her because he knows she likes him). he does everything to avoid the fights and keep everyone together. he's injured, rhodey is paralized, they all betrayed him, but he still goes to help steve. and even after all that he continues to create new things for them, to protect them..

HOMECOMING: the first thing he does after he gets back from siberia, after all the trauma he's been through, is to take peter home. (peter was already spiderman and tony just gave him more protection with a new suit.) he watches over him, protects him, supports him. he asks him to stay away from danger, he takes care of him like his dad never did for him, he made everything he might need in his suit from his own experience, he teaches him to take responsibility. he doesn't want him to go through the same suffering he went through

INFINITY WAR: he did everything to protect everyone, even if they never listen and blamed him. during 6 years he constantly fears an attack, he carries steve's phone everywhere, he made new armors and even implanted a new arc reactor in his skin. he just wanted to live with pepper but when thanos arrives, he goes into space, alone, to face his biggest fear. he face him with his bare hand and he sacrifice himself, begging strange to let him die and not to give the stone for him.

ENDGAME: he's afraid to lose his family and he didn't want to die, but he's still going to help the avengers. even when he finally had a reason to live, when he has a home, a wife, daughter, that he was so close from happiness, he sacrifices all this for a world that doesn't even love him.

tony always did everything for the avengers, he always treated them like family, he made them equipment and took care of them, he did everything to keep them together.. even if they are not there for him, he's always there for them.

he's always full of attention for everyone like making them smoothies after battle, or remembers little details about them. he pays attention to the feelings of everyone and helps and comfort them. he always makes sure that they are okay.

he takes responsability for everything, creates organizations and the iron legion, pays to help repair the damage, gives scholarships, always takes care of people during battle, he evacuates the places, and when there's no time he keeps the danger away by drawing it towards himself.

he's always the one who suffers the most, he has been through the worst traumas but never stop. his priority has always been others. he sacrificed everything, his physical and mental health, his life and his happiness. always ready to risk his life, suffer and die to save everyone.

how can some people be so wrong about him.. how can they hate the man who does everything for his friends, his family.. who sacrifices everything for them and for absolutely everyone..?

this man has the biggest heart and the best soul 💖💖

[petersnya]

sight for sore eyes|| peter b. parker ||

[part. 00; jealousy]

summary:: “I watch your eyes as she walks by…” you pause, tears forming as you remember the way peter looked at her- the way you wanted him to look at you, “what a sight for sore eyes…” || when the realization hits you about peter, it’s too late. but sometimes late is just the right timing… sometimes.

word count:: 1.5k

warnings(for the whole series):: friends>enemies>lovers, mature themes/smut, cursing, slight violence, lots of angst, fluff, clueless peter

warning(for this chapter):: cursing, angst, fluff

paring:: peter parker x fem!reader

[a/n]:: wattup! peter parker (and any other teens mentioned) have been aged up to 17 and turning 18 as the story goes on! i hope you enjoy this and make sure to let me know if you want to be tagged in the parts<3 also! endgame and infinity war did not happen for the sake mine and your happiness though out this ‘book’

“Your going down Parker.”

“Nah man, Im gonna—“

Peter was cut off but the vibration of his controller as you killed his video game character. Taking off your head set and setting down your controller with a calm, soft smirk spread across your face as your side of the TV had ‘winner’ written across.

“No-no! That’s not fair dude! You cheated,” Peter yelled towards you as you walked into the kitchen to grab a slice of pizza. Reaching into the fridge to get a soda, you felt your back being pressed against Peter’s toned chest as he grabbed the soda you had in your hand.

Opening it and taking a sip he chuckle at the look on your face as you turned around to face him. All he did was walk away, back towards the couch, falling back on to it as he picked up his head set.

The look that made the curly headed boy laugh was still on your face as you watched him. To him, you looked annoyed yet humored by him; but really, you couldn’t help this feeling you felt when you felt him against you. Redness began to creep up your neck but quickly faded as you shook the feeling he gave you.

He’s you best friend idiot. You can feel this way for him if all people.

“You coming?” Peter question, starting a new game. You rolled your eyes to make it seem as if you weren’t flustered but the boy a few feet away from you.

“Yea man. Ready to get your ass kicked agin?” You joked as you sat next to him.

“Haha- not funny.” He said with a straight face and a fake laugh that made you giggle as you shoved his shoulder with yours.

The whole night as you a peter played video games back to back, you couldn’t help but think about the feeling of his muscular chest against you. Around 1:20 AM, you and Peter had started to get tired. The boy next to you turned off the gaming console, slowly turning towards you.

“I got the couch, you got the bed.” He said, sleep lacing his voice. You wanted to protest, saying that you could both have the bed; but something stopped you and you just nodded your head, telling him good night as you walked to his bed room. His aunt, May, wasn’t home but made it very clear that she had an eye on both of you so you knew that Peter didn’t want to his aunt May to see you to in the bed together. Even if the two of you were just sleeping.

Laying in bed, Peter’s bed, you stared at the sealing not being able to fall asleep.

The smell of room sent your mind spiraling. Rolling over onto your side, you pushed your arm underneath his pillow as you inhaled his the sent. Peter was the only thing on your mind. The way he smiled, his chocolate hair and honey brown eyes, the light freckles across his nose that you could only see if you were up close to his face. His laugh made your heart skip beats.

“3:57 AM,” you read the clock sign with a sigh. You knew you should go to sleep; so you rolled once again, getting into a more comfortable position. Your eyes getting heavy as you drifted into sleep.

<<<<<<<<

A warm arm draped around your waist, fingers slowly sliding up and down your bare stomach from the shirt that lifted in your sleep.

You smiled softly at the contact, not thinking to check who it was. But the feeling a bare, muscular chest on your back made your eyes fling open.

Slowly, you turned your head to see who was behind you, even though you knew it was—

“Peter?”

“Mhmm,” he hummed back in response, not opening his eyes. You couldn’t shack the feeling of the chill that ran up your spine, and the goosebumps that formed on your body.

“Wha- uh.. what are you doing?” You questioned in a hushed voice.

“Hhmm? Oh sorry. The couch got uncomfortable. I didn’t think you’d mind though.” He said while opening his sleepy looking eyes.

“Oh no-I don’t mind.”

Peter removed his arm, turning with his back turned towards you. You almost whimpered at the feeling of his arm not being around your waist anymore.

Stop it [y/n]. This is Peter we’re talking about here. But why would he put his arm around me and not expect me to feel some way about it?

The thoughts ran through your head fast, the last on lingering for a while.

You and Peter were the best of friends. If he needed someone, you were there and vise versa. But you weren’t really that girly. So Peter didn’t think of you in ‘that type of way’. You didn’t think of him that way either. The two of you always called each other ‘bro’, ‘dude’, or ‘man’; but you still had that feeling of tingles and warmth—

Your thoughts were interrupted by a loud, tired groan from Peter. The sound going straight to your core. Quickly, you got up and went into his bathroom— making sure to not make a lot of noise as you went, Incase May was home.

Looking in the bathroom mirror you stared at your self in question. You were a tom-boy. You were wearing a pair of rolled up basket ball shorts of Peter’s and one of his very large white Tee’s. You shrugged at your reflection,

“If I wanted to look all girly and ‘pretty’ I could be the hottest girl he would know.”

“Who’s he?”

You jumped at the sound of Peter’s raspy voice behind you. He only had on sweats and no shirt. All you could think was

Damn

“No one, just.. speaking hypothetically.”

“Your wired,” he chuckled as you grabbed a towel from the bathroom closet, mumbling something along the lines of, ‘I’m just gonna go shower in Mays bathroom’. You just nodded, going to take a shower of your own in his bathroom.

After your shower, you went into the kitchen where May stood, making coffee for the three of you. Peter sat on the couch flipping through channels.

“Hey honey!”

“Morning May,” you said as you say in one of the chairs at the dining table.

“Are you going to Florida with Peter, Ned and Mj?” She questioned, you nodded in response. The three of you had been planning this for a while now so you were beyond excited to spend time with you best friends.

You stood for the set you just took, walking over to Peter. He was wearing his usual jeans and flannel but this time had a baseball cap on. As you slumped beside you grabbed the hat and put it on you backwards. Peter chuckled at your childish act, glancing at you from the corner of his eye.

The three of you sat in silence till May was done with the coffee. She brought it over to you and Peter, handing you the mugs. You thanked her as she walked away.

Peter’s and your phone got a text notification— the two of you checking it at the same time. It was a group chat with you, Peter, MJ, and Ned for the trip to Universal Studios.

Ned: heyyyy.. so Liz and Flash are also coming to Disney with us.

You and Peter looked at each other at the sight of what Ned texted. You watched as Peter texted back— his cheeks a blushed red color. You have known Peter long enough to know when he’s turning red from anger. This wasn’t anger. He was… blushing?

Peter: Liz is coming?!

You face fell at the text. Looking down at your phone, you glanced up at young guy next to you; but quickly looked away before he saw you.

Mj: yea Ned! Wtf are they coming for???

Ned: well I was talking about it to Betty and they over heard and kinda invited their selves… srry:(

Y/n: I’m just gonna ignore those bitches and go to Hogwarts like I planned.

Peter looked at, “[y/n], you don’t like Liz?” He questioned.

You shocked your head no, not caring enough to look him in the face.

“How dude? She’s so hot,” he said with a smirk. Your heart sank at the words.

What the hell are you acting like this for [y/n]?

Peter continued to text in the group chat. You silenced your phone— not wanted to deal with this right now.

You had never became jealous of anyone. Confusion over took you as you scrambled your mind for why you were jealous of Peter and Liz. You didn’t like Peter at all. Did you?

Did you like Peter Parker? The thought lingered for a while.

No. No I can’t like him and I won’t. It’s just wrong.

Those words that you promised yourself you would keep was the biggest lie you had told yourself. Peter Parker was like a drug—

How could you not get addicted?

I hope you enjoyed this ‘chapter’ !! Let me know if you want to be tagged in the next part!! :)

[flannel-cladpika]

Endgame- Inside the Soul Stone Avengers x GN!Reader

A/N: So, as the title suggests, this takes place inside the Soul Stone, when everyone got snapped.

“Peter, can you please pass me that blanket?” You asked.

Quill was confused, as he was on the other side of the room, making pancakes.

“I-” He started.

“Not you, Star Lord, I meant Parker.”

The younger Peter then responded. “Oh, sure. Here you go.” and handed you a nice, knitted blanket that Wanda had made.

You looked over at T’Challa, who was trying to beat said blanket-maker at chess.

You chuckled. “Hey guys, when do you think they’ll figure out how to get us out of here? I mean, I know they will, but I kind of miss having access to new shows and movies.”

Stephen looked up from his Sherlock Holmes novel. “They’ll figure it out in another 2 years and 13 days.”

Peter brightened up for a second as a thought crossed his mind. 

“Oh! Dr. Strange! Do you have anymore pictures of little Morgan??”

Strange shock his head lightly. “If you mean visions that I can access briefly through interdimensional magic, then yes, I do.”

“Can we just see the “pictures”?” You asked.

The good doctor then made odd motions with his hands and a vision of the little 3-year-old came up. 

The youngest Stark was smiling, laughing with Tony and Pepper as they played peek-a-boo.

“Awwww! She’s so sweet!” You squealed, Peter smiling like a proud big brother.

“I can’t wait to meet her! She has Tony’s hair and Pepper’s eyes! She’s just so adorable!” The young hero said excitedly.

Fury happened to pass by and looked over Parker’s shoulder. He nodded at the image. “Cute kid. Stark’s?”

Bucky walked up, having heard the conversation. “Yup. Hey magic man, can you check on Steve?”

“Yeah. All I hear about is Stark’s brat, and I’d like to see how ol’ Cap is handling the absence of my presence.” Sam strolled over.

Stephen gave an exasperated sigh. “I’m not a photo gallery on your freaking phone. It’s complicated magic that deals with multi-”

“Gonna have to stop you there Doc. We have no Wi-Fi, no streaming services, nothing. The only thing we CAN do is check on our friends. And video and board games, but that’s besides the point.” Laura said.

“Mrs. Barton, I’M the one who brought those from a similar dimension to our own, so as to keep everyone occupied and so that I wouldn’t get constant requests like this.”

Shuri looked up. “I had to modify those consoles so that they resembled Earth’s tech, just so we could use them! The least you could do is carry out a few requests to let us see our friends and family.”

“Ugh.....fine. But only until it’s time for Monopoly.”

“YES!” You and Peter cheered, as Strange began doing his magic circles.

THE END

A/N: I know this isn’t how it worked, and that most of this was impossible, but I just couldn’t stop picturing scenes like this when Infinity War and Endgame came out. Anyways, thank you for reading!!

[9worldstales]

MCU The Avengers - How did the fandom came to believe Loki was tortured by Thanos? (aka when God, Saint Paul and Dante seem to say the same thing)

Everyone has probably heard how there are people who say that, after falling into the Void at the end of “Thor”, Loki was tortured by Thanos and then sent to Earth. Of course every time this story comes up there’s a debate because this is not explicitly shown and some say it’s just a theory (word of Dante), some say someone involved with the work said so (word of Saint Paul) and some says the creators, be it Marvel or Joss Whedon or another director/scriptwriter said so (word of God).

Well, the truth is a collective chat about the three.

But first...

SOURCES MENTIONED:

Movies: “The Avengers” (2012), “Guardians of the Galaxy” (2014), “Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2″ (2017), “Avengers: Infinity War”

Series: “Loki” (2021)

Comics: None mentioned

Direct-to-video animated film: None mentioned

Motion comics: None mentioned

Books: “The art of The Avengers” (2012)

Novels: “Marvel Cinematic Universe Phase One: The Avengers” (2015)

Webs: The official Marvel web

Others: Interview: “‘Thor: The Dark World’: Tom Hiddleston on boom times for evildoers”, Interview: “Tom Hiddleston - live on stage Q&A: Popcorn Tax.i October 8, 2013, Event Cinemas George Street, Sydney”, Interview: “Tom Hiddleston THE AVENGERS Set Visit Interview”, Interview: “Joss Whedon told Comic-Con the question he doesn’t want us to ask ever again”, Interview: ‘Avengers: Infinity War’ director explains why a major death had to happen so early in the movie, Script: “The Avengers”, Interview: Secrets Revealed in Joss Whedon’s Avengers DVD Commentary

Let’s start with...

WORD OF DANTE (aka fancanons)

Undoubtedly fans noticed some suspicious things in Loki which has brought them to draw certain conclusions.

1) At the end of “Thor”, when he control Selvig, his face seems to be bruised, as if he had been beaten. It’s easy for fans to assume if he seems to be beaten maybe... well, he was?

2) When he arrives, in “The Avengers”, in some scenes he seems unsteady on his feet and in poor shape as if he’d been beaten and, in one scene, he seems unable to stand straight. Same as above, Loki will prove through the movie he’s very resistant. If something made him unsteady on his feet... well, this can mean someone beaten him.

3) The Other threatens him and keeps him under surveillance, as if he’s controlling him somehow, both during the movie and in a deleted scene, which seems to imply Loki is working under coercion more than willingly.

THE OTHER: You will have your war, Asgardian. If you fail, if the Tesseract is kept from us, there will be no realm, no barren moon, no crevice where he can’t find you. You think you know pain? He will make you long for something as sweet as pain. [The Avengers]

4) Some wondered if Loki could have ended up being possessed as well by the sceptre as the sceptre could control minds.

5) Some noticed how Loki’s eyes appear as blue in “The Avengers”, a characteristic of the possessed guys, while in “Thor” they seem to be green was a hint Loki was possessed, same as Selvig and Barton.

6) Some wondered if Thanos might have tortured him to force him to cooperate as Thanos is known for having tortured people working under him. We saw him torturing Nebula in both “Avengers: Infinity War” and “Avengers: Endgame” and we also have those bits:

Gamora: He’s not my father. When Thanos took my home world, he killed my parents in front of me. He tortured me, turned me into a weapon. [Guardians of the Galaxy]

Nebula: You were the one who wanted to win. And I just wanted a sister! You were all I had. But you were the one who needed to win. Thanos pulled my eye from my head… and my brain from my skull… and my arm from my body… because of you. [Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2]

Gamora: All my life, I dreamed of a day... a moment when you would get what you deserved. And I was always so disappointed. But now... you kill and torture... and you call it mercy. The universe has judged you. You asked it for a prize, and it told you no. You failed. And do you wanna know why? Because you love nothing. No one. [Avengers: Infinity War]

7) Others assumed that, if Thanos didn’t do it personally, another of his children could have done it for him. We saw Ebony Maw torturing Stange in order to get the stone for Thanos.

Ebony Maw: You’ll only wish you were dead. [Avengers: Infinity War]

8) Since Thanos was willing to kill Rohan should he fail to bring back to him the orb, Thanos would have killed Loki if he hadn’t brought back the Tesseract so Loki was working for him under coercion.

Thanos: I shall honour our agreement, Kree. If you bring me the Orb. But return to me again empty-handed... ...and I will bathe the stairways in your blood. [Guardians of the Galaxy]

Ebony Maw: In all the time I’ve served Thanos, I’ve never failed him. If I were to reach our rendezvous on Titan with the Time Stone still attached to your vaguely irritating person, there would be... judgement. [Avengers: Infinity War]

9) Loki’s willing cooperation wasn’t needed if Thanos had the feeling Loki could do it. He had blackmailed Gamora into giving him the location of the soul stone and he had killed Tivan to get the reality stone.

World of Dante is, as usual, very charming but if not supported by anything else it can’t ascend to canon. This doesn’t mean it’s false unless Word of God ends up stating the opposite, but this doesn’t mean it’s true either. Just possible but unproved.

So is there someone else that’s a little stronger than fan theories?

Enter...

WORD OF SAINT PAUL (aka what Tom Hiddleston says)

For start that he has blue eyes and, from the way he speak, apparently he was never made wear green eye contacts.

Loki is a sexy villain, but that’s not part of his ambition, is it? He doesn’t seem to be interested in love or sex but he has this sexuality about him, maybe it’s his lust for power. What do you think of Loki as a sexy beast? [Laughs] That’s the first time anyone has ever used that phrase about Loki. It’s fascinating isn’t it? I don’t know because it’s not a part of the conscious construction. I take relish in playing him. I think there’s a physical self-possession about him, a self-acceptance. Of course I’ve been very exacting about his physicality. You know, I was born with very blonde, curly hair, and a mixture of Scottish and English genes, and my complexion is very ruddy and healthy. In making him with this raven black hair and blanching my face of all colour, it changes my features. Suddenly my blue eyes look a lot bluer, which lends a severity to my face. And even my own smile has a distorted menace to it. Whatever comes through me naturally is distorted. It’s almost like a filter on a light. [‘Thor: The Dark World’: Tom Hiddleston on boom times for evildoers]

This disproves Fan theory point number 5. You might have noticed though that the theory about Loki being possessed by the sceptre is point 4. You’ll see later why I hadn’t placed those two points together.

And now let’s see what he has to say about what happened between “Thor” and “The Avengers.

In your opinion, what happen to Loki when he fell in to the void? Like, what did he experienced? HIDDLESTON: “You mean at the end of Thor?” “Yeah.” HIDDLESTON: “I think he went like with everything else to… Joss Whedon and I discussed it, to a sort of… hum… as… It was like the worst place imaginable. I think, he went to sort of all of the darkest recesses of the Universe, you know. I’m sure he had a brush with… with... with... several brushes with death. I think he ran into the shadiest characters you can find in the Nine Realms. I think he had to rely on his wits to protect himself. Hum… It was really, really, really unpleasant, I think. Umm… and all I have to, you know, I don’t have any frame of reference for that, really, except for imagining what it might be like to be… I don’t know, to be kidnapped by sort of a terrorist cell or something. And have to survive very very frightening and precarious existence. But whatever it was, it was important when Loki came back for the Avengers. Whatever compassion he had left, was absolutely kind a shrivelled to a minimum. Because of the experience he had. Harrowing, I think, and scarring for life. In a way that Odin and Thor, and Frigga find very, very difficult to understand. It’s a good question. Happy Birthday.” [Tom Hiddleston - live on stage Q&A: Popcorn Tax.i October 8, 2013, Event Cinemas George Street, Sydney]

How different is Loki in this film when compared to how he is in Thor? I think that he comes into his own power at the end of Thor. Is he just very angry and bitter in this film? HIDDLESTON: Well, what can I say here? I swear to you that in that building over there, there are sniper rifles. [laughs] I think that what was interesting about the journey of Loki in Thor is that he went from second string and damaged prints to being the God of mischief and God of evil. I think somewhere between the end of Thor and the beginning of The Avengers, Loki has been to the Marvel equivalent of the 7th circle of hell. At the end of Thor you see him let go. He lets go of the spear, he lets go of Asgard, and he lets go of the need of his brother and father’s affection and approval. He has bigger plans now. [Tom Hiddleston THE AVENGERS Set Visit Interview]

HIDDLESTON: “At the end of Thor, Loki lets go of that spear and falls into a wormhole,” Hiddleston said. “And the question in the audience’s mind, one hopes, is what happens to Loki in that moment? And in the time between the end of Thor and the beginning of The Avengers, Loki has explored the shadowy highways and byways of the universe – and he’s met some terrible, terrible people and probably has some awful experiences, which he has survived and overcome. So by the time he arrives in The Avengers, he knows the extents of his power – and he’s unafraid to use it. And more importantly, he’s unafraid to enjoy it.” [The Art of The Avengers]

There’s actually more but I think I’ll stop here.

Overall Tom Hiddleston seems to be a big supporter of something terrible happening to Loki, something equivalent to being ‘to the Marvel equivalent of the 7th circle of hell’* evidently at the hands of someone, the ‘shadiest characters you can find in the Nine Realms’, ‘some terrible, terrible people’.

Basically he says ‘I don’t have any frame of reference for that, really, except for imagining what it might be like to be… I don’t know, to be kidnapped by sort of a terrorist cell or something. And have to survive very very frightening and precarious existence.’

[*7th circle of hell: For who’s curious the 7th circle of hell in Dante Alighieri’s Divina Commedia is where are punished those who had committed violence against others and against themselves (suicides). Loki committed both sins. For Dante people who committed violence against people is immersed in a river of boiling blood with centaurs shooting arrows at those who try to escape while suicides are transformed into bushes and trees, gnarled and thorny, fed upon by the Harpies for all time. Likely that’s not what was done to him but anyway that’s not a nice place to be.]

Yes, Tom Hiddleston never said it was Thanos and his men who ‘kidnapped Loki and put him through the equivalent of the 7th circle of hell’. He’s very vague on this but we now Tom Hiddleston is careful not to give information which could constitute spoilers.

He also never mentions Loki being mind controlled as far as I know.

So we need an even higher source.

We need...

WORD OF GOD, or, in this case the WORD OF GODS, plural, because in the Marvel world there’s plenty of people who can claim authorship for the stories of those characters.

Whedon avoided speculating about his future plans, claiming he had too much on his plate to think about what will come next, but he did reveal that he’s bothered by a bit of unresolved backstory for Loki. At the end of Thor, Loki was emotional conflicted, but at the beginning of Avengers, he’s a demented villain, with no qualms about unleashing alien hell on Earth. Asked about how happened in between, Whedon said: “Well, I can’t tell you exactly what went on because it’s this dark, dark secret that I didn’t make up yet. But, the other day, I had trouble with that because he had this very passionate Shakespearean tragedy thing going on in Thor and then I needed a villain who’s not only capable, but ready and willing and anxious to take on all these heroes. For me, he just basically went on some horrible walkabout… That was pretty much as far as I got.” [Joss Whedon told Comic-Con the question he doesn’t want us to ask ever again]

God confirms what Tom Hiddleston said, Loki went through something terrible... but he had no idea what because he still had to work on it. He didn’t want to establish what. But, as I said, Marvel has plenty of Gods willing to talk.

After Loki fell in the wormhole... where did he fell?

Arriving at the Sanctuary through a wormhole caused by the Bifrost, Loki met the Other, ruler of the ancient race of extraterrestrials the Chitauri, and Thanos. Offering the God of Mischief dominion over his brother’s favorite realm Earth, Thanos requested the Tesseract in return. Gifted with a Sceptre that acted as a mind control device, Loki would be able to influence others. Unbeknownst to him, the Sceptre was also influencing him, fueling his hatred over his brother Thor and the inhabitants of Earth. [MARVERL official web]

So no, after falling into the wormhole Loki didn’t go on a touristic trip through the universe, met someone bad unrelated to Thanos, changed and then met up with Thanos.

He straight out ended up at the Sanctuary and met with the Other who worked for Thanos.

Yes, they don’t say he got tortured in this bit but they confirm the sceptre was influencing him, ‘fueling his hatred over his brother Thor and the inhabitants of Earth’.

There’s some more that comes from Joe Russo and Stephen McFeely.

If you’ve watched every movie in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, you shouldn’t have been too surprised Thanos killed Loki. His death has been a long time coming since 2012’s “Avengers.” You may not recall, but it was Loki’s job in “Avengers” to secure the Tesseract and deliver it to Thanos. Loki never made good on that promise. It was only a matter of time before Thanos came after him to collect. Co-director Joe Russo says Thanos ultimately murders Loki “for disobedience.” “Remember, he [Thanos] had a relationship with Loki, even if it was off-screen where he entrusted him with a duty in ‘Avengers 1’ and Loki failed,” pointed out “Infinity War” screenwriter Stephen McFeely. “He’s [Thanos] making him [Loki] pay,” added Joe Russo. “Thanos has a long memory,” McFeely concluded. [‘Avengers: Infinity War’ director explains why a major death had to happen so early in the movie]

And then... then there’s something that’s even above World of God.

So finally we have...

CANON, aka what the movies say, and they say the weirdest canon lines in this regard if I can say so.

Thanos: [Walks over and drops Loki’s body in front of Thor.] No resurrections this time. [Avengers: Infinity War]

Loki: Is that the only reason you brought us here? To kill us? I’ve lost track of the number of times I’ve been killed, so go ahead. Do your worst. [Loki Ep 4]

How all this translates? (aka Word of Dante comes back because God and Saint Paul are just too obscure and canon is no better)

If Loki after falling into the wormhole ended up straight to the Sanctuary, the ones who played the part of the terrorists and lead him to an experience similar to ending in the 7th circle of hell where he had many brushes with death where either Thanos or his men.

Do your pick if the Other took care of it personally, if Thanos did the job or if he let the pleasure to Ebony Maw and what they did to him, if they forced him to fight with others same as Gamora and Nebula where forced to do, with the loser also losing a body part or if they just beat him.

The fact that Loki, in the “Loki” series say he has been killed so many times he lost count and that Thanos in “Avengers: Infinity War” says there will be no resurrection this time seem to be connected.

That Loki as far as we know only attempted suicide by letting himself fall in a wormhole once, and Thanos couldn’t know Loki was given up for dead in Svartalfheim so the idea that Loki was killed many time and that Thanos know he had been resurrected should be connected.

How? That’s beyong my understanding as, as far as I know, no one in Thanos’ group has resurrecting powers. Can the mind stone do it? This would open up another theory.

As for the sceptre controlling him ‘fuelling his hatred over his brother Thor and the inhabitants of Earth’ what does that mean?

That he’s clearly not completely brainwashed as Selvig and Hawkeye.

So which is his level of brainwashing?

Very likely it’s at the same level as the one of the Avengers when they are in the same room and start arguing and the discussion degenerates to the point they seemed about to go at each other while the gem in the sceptre starts to glow, which is something both the script and the novelization reference...

[As the “team” argues, they don’t realize the BLUE GEM on Loki’s sceptre is glowing brightly.] [“The Avengers” Script]

None of them noticed when the gem set into Loki’s sceptre started to glow. [“Marvel Cinematic Universe Phase One: The Avengers”]

...and that the visual remark, turning the scene upside down as the gem is in full focus.

The novelization describes them as arguing without even knowing exactly what they’re arguing about.

Tony and Cap squared off over an argument that they couldn’t remember starting. Tony was still mad about the last thing Cap had said to him... whatever it was. [“Marvel Cinematic Universe Phase One: The Avengers”]

We also see Bruce picking up the sceptre without realizing, something that’s referenced both by the script and the novel.

BANNER: You wanna know my secret, Agent Romanoff? You wanna know how I stay calm? [BLACK WIDOW and Fury have their hands down to grab their guns.] STEVE: Doctor Banner... put down the sceptre. [BANNER LOOKS DOWN AND IS SHOCKED TO SEE HE’S HOLDING LOKI’S SCEPTRE. The computer beeps. They all turn to it.] [“The Avengers” Script]

“Dr. Banner,” Cap said. “Put down the sceptre.” Bruce looked down. He hadn’t even known he’d picked it up. He looked back up and saw Natasha’s hand on her sidearm. Fury was also ready to draw. The others were drawing back from him as well. Even though he could see what was going on, the hostility in the air was still tick enough that Bruce didn’t know wherever he could back everyone down... or wherever he could back himself down. He could feel the tension rising inside him. He could feel the monster trying to get loose. [“Marvel Cinematic Universe Phase One: The Avengers”]

The implication is that the sceptre is influencing them, pulling out their worst feelings and competitively and whatever which matches with what it did with Loki, it fuelled his hate.

It’s interesting how, when Loki arrives on Earth, the gem is glowing...

Also, the stranger held a kind of spear in his right hand. Set into its head, a gem glowed the same icy blue as the energy that had spilled from the Tesseract. [“Marvel Cinematic Universe Phase One: The Avengers”]

...and he also looks at the sceptre as if he hadn’t realized having it in his hand.

“Sir,” Fury called as armoured S.H.I.E.L.D. agents closed nearer, “Please put down the spear.” The man looked at the sceptre as if he had only just noticed he had it. Then, slowly, he looked back up at Fury, and a vicious smile spread across his face. [“Marvel Cinematic Universe Phase One: The Avengers”]

It’s worth to mention though, in that scene in which the Avengers argue, none of the Avengers has his eyes turning blue, although they weren’t themselves any longer.

So, it’s possible this is the distinction, Clint and Selvig have completely lost their will and are subjugated to Loki’s will, and as a result they’ve the blue eyes, Loki and the Avengers instead only had their mind warped by increasing exponentially their negative feelings to the point they might have started losing focus of the situation and only operate on negative feelings... if that’s make sense. They’re still themselves but their perception is warped so they’re acting in a way that’s not normal for them.

On another note it seems that in Joss Whedon’s Avengers DVD Commentary he said that

Hawkeye’s blue “possessed eyes” were added in post very late in the game, to make it more obvious that he and Eric Selvig were under Loki’s influence. [Secrets Revealed in Joss Whedon’s Avengers DVD Commentary]

This means that originally they weren’t meant to turn blue.

In the novel there’s no mention of it, in the script they’re described just as glowing black and then nothing more.

LOKI: You have heart. [Loki places the tip of the spear against Barton’s chest. Barton’s eye glow black, and he stops resisting. Loki begins controlling other agents around the room. Fury sneak up, grabs the Tesseract, and places it in a briefcase, trying to sneak out.] [“The Avengers” Script]

In the movie instead they turn all black for a moment and then settle on blue.

It’s an unnatural blue though, where Loki’s normal.

But again, this too is a fan explanation. A fan explanation based on canon, but still a fan explanation since God didn’t bother to explain further and at this point I’m afraid he’s not even interested in explaining it since the “Loki” series could have dug on this and instead expressed 0 interest in digging into the past movies.

Sometimes we’ve just to accept that fan theories are all we have and that we can like or dislike them.

And that’s all. Thank you to who remained till the end of this long post!

[peanut-butter-parkerxx]

plane pillow

where peter planned to play video games with ned through the whole flight but fate decided to take another turn....

*A/N: this isnt related to far from home nor the ending of endgame, just pretend infinity and all the movies after didnt exist since i imagine pete 16 in here. i dont know why 16 i just like that age on him lmao, enjoy reading!*

pairing: peter x reader

status: strangerz (well sort of since they haven't talked to eachother but they're in the same school)

NOT PROOF READ BTW SO SORRY IF THERE ARE ANY MISTAKES

peter's POV

"the flight will be amazing! i heard they'd installed the new game we were talking about" i gushed to ned, excited for the whole flight to be filled with video games.

"im excited" ned stated practically jumping from excitement and i shook my head laughing

"OK CLASS!" Mr Harrington clapped his hands getting our attention "we're boarding the plane in a few minutes so pack your stuff and lets goooo" he pointed at our gate dramatically.

we walked to the gate, scanned our ticket and sat on our assigned seats, ned and i sat on the three seater, he took the window seat by winning a 3 round match of rock, paper, scissors *sighs angrily* and i obvious got the middle, kinda scared of who'll sit beside me though.

we had to wait for a few minutes, since we boarded the flight early. ned and i obviously started playing video games, too entranced by the small glowing screen infront of me i haven't realized a girl.

she hadn't really acknowledged me either because she looked tired, i cursed at the screen for losing the game too quickly and my dumb ass still didnt realize a GIRL, MY AGE, looking PRETTY FUCKING ADORABLE was sitting next to me. oh dear god.

after a couple more games and me being the most idiotic teenager known today for not looking at my right to see her  the flight attendant alerted us that the plane will take off so we the screen will freeze any moment. ned and i decided to sleep, it was very early in the morning and we need to rest if we plan on gaming most of the flight.

i closed my eyes and shifted a bit in my seat, and slept. the plain was moving at the time trying to find the best place to take off. i guess i was really tired that i havent felt someone sleeping on my shoulder.

i was peacefully sleeping still agitated from the uncomfortable seat but i heard a loud noise that frightened the life out of me and due to my spidey senses i sensed a hand on my right, so what did i do? i fucking held the hand. hard, may i add, from the fright.

i opened my eyes quickly and jumped a bit, turning around to see who's the stranger that i held hands with, startled as well. i sighed in relief knowing our plane was safe and it was just about to take off. but then i took a good look on the perso- her, took a good look on her, on her? OH MY GOD ITS A GIRL calm down peter and please dont scare her off. i couldnt stop looking at her and to my luck she was looking at me as well, but none of us spoke

i couldnt help but notice the small part of her y/h/c hair that was shown from her hood looked so shiny and smooth, her eyes were the most perfect shade of y/e/c. the extremely large hoodie looked so comfortable on her which made me think of her wearing one of mine, how big and long it'll look on her body sent butterflies to my stomach. she looked small, and precious so fragile yet she held her body confidently.

the voice of the flight attendant echoed through the speakers which made us both stop our trance of one another. even though the lady's voice wasnt scary it still frightened us. i mean no hate towards miss attendant she called me a cutie and gave me extra blankets

but coz we got startled again we held hands....again looking for the sources of the noise. we visibly relaxed once we realized what it was, looked at eachother and laughed, her laugh was angelic and soft, hands down the best sound ive ever head. she looked rather embarrassed from the encounter but i bet you a thousand dollars i look worse, i could practically feel the blood rush through my cheeks once she realized how long ive stared at her

"i- uhm i-im so sorry for sleeping on your shoulder, and- and holding your hand and stuff" she apologized, it only made me even more baffled by her. how could a voice match with a face so perfectly.

"no no its fine uhh i dont mind *nervous laugh* and for the hand thing i was the one who grabbed yours so i-i should be the one apologizing...im sorry" i rubbed the back of my neck. this is why i dont talk to girls, ever. well mj is an exception since shes like the closest thing i have to a friend other than my best friend obviously.

"i-im y/n, by the way" she lifted her hand properly introducing herself

"peter, peter parker" i shook her hand, it was nice feeling the warmth of her hand again. we probably held hands (for the third time today by the way) longer the we should have but who am i to say i was bothered. i definitely wasnt.

"nice to meet you peter" she smiled shaking our hands one last time then sitting it on her lap. scratch what i said about her gorgeous laugh, hearing her say my name was the best thing ive heard in my 16 year of existence. (her laugh is obviously the second best)

before i could ask anything else, the plane decided to finally take off. i adjusted myself to the seat, not turning to my right side anymore and closed my eyes trying to think of smiling puppies. ive been on a plane before, in fact a private one last year but that was it. this is my second time flying away from new york and i was a bit nervous.

y/n somehow noticed my sudden tense form, who am i kidding i looked like i was about to die coz of my nerves. and held my hand. and i immediately opened my eyes again, the feeling of her skin coming in contact with mine brought chills down my spine, good ones obviously

"you looked rather tense, is this ok?" she leaned into my ear so i could hear her. i looked at her confused on why she would want to help me but nodded as a reply. a smile crept on my face and i couldnt seem to take it off.  the take off went smoothly thank god. and ive occasionally squeezed her hand, usually when the plane made very loud sounds. but i made it! woohoo

i didnt know if i should stop holding her hand or not, even though i didnt want to. will she think im a creep? and if i did, will she think im rude? but i guess it didnt seem to bother her if she went back to sleeping. so i figured i should do the same

i shifted in my seat a couple of times trying to get the perfect comfy spot....nothing. this seat will be the death of m-

"you can sleep on my shoulder if you want" she whispered. "i figured since you let me sleep on yours which im very sorry about, you could sleep on mine" she smiled

"thanks, but i dont wanna bother you or make you uncomfortable"

"oh nonsense! my body is screaming right now cheering for me, well partially scolding at me for saying something risky like that to a good looking guy, its ok" she laughed, her eyes widened in shock from what she confessed. i smiled at her and rested my head on her shoulder

"you think im good looking?" i whispered playing with our fingers, i dont know when i got the sudden confidence but hearing someone like her think a loser like me is cute did something to me.

"shut up" she playfully shoved me and i laughed.

"are you from midtown?" i asked her

"no im from queens" she joked

"oh you're definitely from midtown" i chuckled, next thing i know i was having a normal conversation with me laying my head on a girl i just met like we knew eachother for years, it was nice to talk to a girl i potentially thought was cute instead of talking gibberish

she was very understanding and looked like interested into what i was saying, i was gonna skip my geeky side when she asked about what i like but to my surprise, she mentioned it when i asked her the same, she said she loves comics and likes watching sci fi movies. i asked her if she watched star wars and she said she didnt...yet.

"wanna uhm watch it together?" i played with her fingers absentmindedly nervous if she'd reject me.

"yeah sure" her eyes lit up like she was waiting for me to ask her that. we watched the movie in bliss, thankfully she liked it! and immediately said to put the second one. and surprise surprise, we finished it.

when the credits rolled in, i saw her yawning, shifting in her seat again, i decided to be bold so i lifted her head off my shoulder pulled the arm rest away from us, took a pillow and patted my lap. immediately after doing it i regretted it, she barely knows me, what the fuck peter.

"you sure?" she asked smiling a bit, she looked like she felt something giddy inside which made me feel at peace again and i nodded.

"good night" she whispered snuggling her head on my lap, i hesitantly put my arm over

"good night, y/n" and we fell asleep like how ned slept the whooole time i was talking to her, wow we have a lot to catch up on

bonus:

peters pov

i didnt know the whole plane (our class) practically gushed over my interaction with y/n, i know its been a while since i liked a girl but betty and the rest (including Mr Harrington) practically begged mj to take photos of us since she was the closest, not that she wouldnt have done it without them asking her....

*A/N: idk what this bonus was lmao but i had to add the school feeling happy for our boy pete*

have a wonderful morning/afternoon/evening/night!

-quacksonlover

[pinktwingirl]

Loki Series Rewrite (AKA Loki Series but with Squirrel Girl): Ep 1

Hey guys! Long story short, I wasn’t a fan of the Loki series, so I decided to make my own rewrite (including my favorite Marvel character, Squirrel Girl!) These are basically a collection of scenes that I would’ve either added or rewritten to improve the show. Btw, this is a continuation of my Endgame rewrite where Loki comes back to life after dying in Infinity War, so the Loki in this version is modern-day Loki, not 2012 Loki. Also, the whole Loki x Sylvie self-cest thing made me VEEERRRRY UNCOMFY, so I got rid of it. Their relationship is purely platonic in this. Anyways, enjoy! (This work is in screenplay format.)

INT. TVA - DAY

We pan through the TVA and see agents at work, checking timelines and watching training videos. We see various TVA posters warning about variants and "protecting the sacred timeline."

We then cut to RAVONNA RENSLAYER in her office. She is at her desk, sorting through files. Suddenly, an agent bursts in.

AGENT

Ma'am, we have a situation.

Ravonna follows the agent to a computer, where we see a timeline branching off from the main one.

AGENT

Is this the variant we've been searching for?

Ravonna glances at the computer and nods.

RAVONNA

About damn time...

EXT. CHICAGO BAR, 1986 - NIGHT

We see a woman with long, black hair and a green dress chatting with a man in a bar. The song "Devil Woman" by Cliff Richard is playing in the background.

MAN

Can I interest you in another drink, beautiful?

The woman lets out a flirty laugh and blushes.

WOMAN

Oh, you're too kind.

The man turns to the bartender.

MAN

Hey, can you get my girl here a...

(He turns to the woman.)

What can I get you, honey?

WOMAN

Surprise me.

The man turns back to the bartender.

MAN

You heard her.

The woman has a devilish smirk on her face as she watches them. The man turns back to her as the bartender starts mixing a drink.

MAN

You know, I feel selfish. I've been talking so much about myself, but I still don't know a thing about you.

WOMAN

Well... what do you want to know?

Suddenly, another man approaches them.

MAN #2

Hey, what do you think you're doing with my date?!

MAN

Your date? She's mine, asshole!

MAN #2

I caught her first!

(He turns to the woman.)

I'm sorry, honey, is this guy bothering you?

MAN

Bothering her?! You listen here, shithead-

He grabs the other man and they begin to wrestle with each other.

WOMAN

(Playfully)

Oh no, please don't fight over me...

As the men grow more violent, a bit of green magic shoots out of the woman's hand, causing the first man's wallet to fly into her grasp. She slips by the men, undetected as the bartender tries to break them up. Outside the bar, the woman walks off. With a smirk, she shifts into LOKI, now in his male form. He unveils the tesseract with magic and disappears.

INT. THE BENATAR - NIGHT

Loki reappears in the Guardians' ship, where Thor and the Guardians of the Galaxy are waiting for him. Loki smirks.

LOKI

Another successful venture.

THOR

Did they fight?

LOKI

Like bilgesnipe.

Thor bursts into laughter, and Loki hands Rocket the wallet.

LOKI

I also got the wallet, as requested. Although, I don't think Midgardian currency will have much value on the far side of the galaxy.

ROCKET

Who cares about the money? I just wanted the wallet.

(He dumps out the dollar bills and admires the wallet.)

This is nice leather...

LOKI

Anyone else have any travel requests?

QUILL

Oh, I got a whole bunch.

NEBULA

Quit acting like children. An infinity stone is not a toy to be played with.

LOKI

Oh, please. The tesseract and I go far back. If anyone can control it, I can.

ROCKET

You know, I'm starting to think you've just gotten sick of being around us, and now you're just looking for an excuse to get away.

LOKI

I will neither confirm nor deny that.

THOR

By that, he means "yes."

ROCKET

That's pretty rude of you, grease weasel.

Loki scowls at him.

DRAX

Can you travel to Kylos? I would greatly enjoy having some trego fruit again.

LOKI

Certainly.

The tesseract starts to glow in his hands.

INT. TVA - DAY

The agent and Ravonna are still at the computer.

AGENT

He's using the stone again. He's going to time-jump.

RAVONNA

Block it. Intercept him.

The agent presses a button.

EXT. MONGOLIA - DAY

Loki crash lands in the Gobi Desert and wakes up, looking utterly confused as a group of villagers approach him.

VILLAGER

(in Mongolian)

Who are you? Why have you come to our home?

Loki raises an eyebrow and opens his mouth to respond. Suddenly, a portal opens and several TVA agents enter. They lean down to examine the tesseract, and Loki abruptly rushes over to them.

LOKI

Don't touch that!

The agents ready their prune sticks. Suddenly, HUNTER B-15 opens a portal and enters.

HUNTER B-15

It appears to be a standard sequence violation.

(She checks her tem-pad)

Branch is growing at a stable rate and slope. Variant identified.

LOKI

I beg your pardon?

HUNTER B-15

On behalf of the Time Variance Authority, I hereby arrest you for crimes against the sacred timeline. Hands up.

The agents activate their prune sticks.

HUNTER B-15

You're coming with us.

LOKI

I'm sorry, who's "us"?

Hunter B-15 activates her own prune stick.

HUNTER B-15

Last chance, variant.

Loki chuckles.

LOKI

Look, I don't know who the hell you seem to think you are... But if you don't mind, this is actually your last chance.

(Beat)

Now get out of my way.

Before he can attack, Hunter B-15 strikes him with her stick.

INT. TVA COURTROOM - DAY

Ravonna pounds her gavel.

RAVONNA

Next case, please!

Hunter B-15 forces Loki onto the stand.

RAVONNA

"Laufeyson"... Variant L1130, aka "Loki Laufeyson"...

LOKI

I prefer "Odinson," thank you.

After a pause, Ravonna shrugs.

RAVONNA

Very well...

(She crosses out "Laufeyson" on his case file and writes in "Odinson.")

Loki Odinson, you are charged with sequence violation 7-20-89. How do you plead?

Loki chuckles.

LOKI

Madam, a god doesn't plead. Look, this has been a very enjoyable pantomime, but I'd like to go home now.

RAVONNA

Are you guilty or not guilty, sir?

Loki smirks.

LOKI

Guilty of being the god of mischief, yes. Guilty of finding all of this incredibly tedious, yes. Guilty of a... "crime"... against the "sacred timeline"? Absolutely not, you have the wrong person.

RAVONNA

Oh, really? And who should we have?

LOKI

Well, in my defense, the only reason I ever came in possession of the tesseract is because the Avengers traveled back in time.

Mobius enters the courtroom.

RAVONNA

We're not here to talk about the Avengers. What they did was supposed to happen; you reviving yourself with the tesseract and running around time, causing chaos was not.

Loki laughs.

LOKI

I'm sorry - not supposed to happen according to whom?

RAVONNA

The timekeepers.

INT. TIME THEATER - DAY

Mobius is showing Loki clips of his life and trying to dig deeper into his psyche.

MOBIUS

You know, trying to kill all the frost giants, invading Earth, I don't see anything very mischievous about this...

He plays a clip of the bifrost nearly destroying Jotunheim. A family of frost giants runs in fear as the land is destroyed. A little girl screams as her father is vaporized by the blast. Loki is visibly uncomfortable.

MOBIUS

Look at that. Did you enjoy doing that?

LOKI

Enough of your games. You've made your point.

Ignoring him, Mobius plays the clip of him telling Kurse where to go.

MOBIUS

And then, you tried tricking the dark elves into finding Thor, but instead, you sent them right to Frigga.

Loki tenses when he sees Frigga fighting Malekith.

LOKI

I don't want to watch this.

He winces, trying to keep himself together, as he watches Malekith stab Frigga.

MOBIUS

Well, you're going to watch it. Because that's your life, that's the consequences of your actions, and that is the proper flow of time! Now, why don't you tell me, do you enjoy hurting people?

LOKI

I don't have to play your games-

MOBIUS

Do you enjoy killing?

LOKI

I'll kill you.

MOBIUS

What, like you did your mother?

Enraged, Loki tosses a chair at him. Mobius dodges it, and it flies through the hologram of Frigga's dead body. Loki lunges at Mobius, but he uses the time twister to send him back on the ground. Loki growls in pain.

MOBIUS

Sorry, the time twister just loops you, not the furniture. You weren't born to be king, Loki. You were born to cause pain and suffering and death. That's how it is, that's how it was, and that's how it always will be. All so that others can achieve their best versions of themselves.

LOKI

(Voice cracking)

That's not true. You're lying.

MOBIUS

It is true. Your life ended after Thanos snapped your neck, because you fulfilled your purpose of assembling the Avengers to destroy you. Your purpose was never to become a hero. You're a villain, and that will never change as long as the sacred timeline runs its course.

INT. TIME THEATER - DAY

After Loki escapes and returns to the time theater on his own, he finds a folder of papers on the table. He opens it and reads the first file. It reads "LOKI ODINSON - MAIN OBJECTIVES: MURDER, LIE, MANIPULATE. LIFE PURPOSE: CATALYST FOR THE AVENGERS. OBJECTIVE FULFILLED. LIFE TERMINATED. END OF FILE.

Horrified, Loki stares at the file as tears run down his face. After a moment, he starts laughing as Hunter B-15 enters.

HUNTER B-15

Something funny?

After a pause, Loki shakes his head.

LOKI

Glorious purpose...

INT. TIME THEATER - DAY

Loki is talking with Mobius after being apprehended again.

LOKI

I will admit, the TVA is... formidable. Even an infinity stone is useless here.

(Beat)

You're not going to let me return to my own timeline, are you?

(Beat)

MOBIUS

Normally, no, we wouldn't. But... if you help us... maybe the timekeepers might be willing to make an exception. A rogue variant's been killing our minutemen.

LOKI

And you need the god of mischief to help you stop him?

MOBIUS

That's right.

LOKI

Why me?

MOBIUS

The variant we're hunting is... you.

Have some actual Lady Loki yay! 

So yeah, the purpose of this episode was mainly to re-establish the show within the continuity of my version of Endgame. Squirrel Girl comes in next episode!

@drawntothedarkside Here’s your tag!

[liberty-barnes]

Tom being in love with your baby niece

Tom Holland x Female!Reader

Prompt: You meet Tom at a hospital and he’s immediately infatuated with the little girl in your lap (inspired by this video I found on tiktok)

Warnings: F L U F F, Tom being amazing with kids, mentions of alcoholic/drug addict mother, mentions of child abandonment, but overall fluff and feel good story

Word Count: 2379 words (this was supposed to be short but oh well)

Estimated Reading Time: 9 minutes

A/N: me, sweating profusely: calm down, just finish writing this, you are stronger than your baby fever, you are too young to have a child CALM TF DOWN

Masterlist

So, funny story, you met at the hospital

Tom had dislocated his shoulder while doing a backflip *dejected sigh*

And you were just trying to keep your baby niece calm while waiting for the nurse to come get you

You were sitting on the bed, Tom was right next to you, only a curtain separating you

But there was a tiny crack near the end from where it was pulled too far

And when you pressed Olivia closer to your chest, her head resting on your shoulder, she made eye contact with him

He saw her tear-filled eyes

(broke his heart)

So he started to make funny faces at her

Which made her start to giggle and coo and make grabby hands towards him

You turned around, visibly confused because hellooo she was just crying a second ago and now she’s???laughing???

And then you saw him

oh shit he’s hot

He smiled at you

You smiled back, cause what else are you supposed to do?

He got up and pushed the curtains back 

And sat on the chair instead

Still on his side of the curtain

But looking at you straight in the eye now

“So... what’s a pretty girl like you doing in a nasty place like this?”

Poor boy thought he was smooth

But he rested his weight on his injured arm

(that idiot) 

And it lead to him hissing in pain and cradling his shoulder with a pout while you laughed

“Fell down the stairs and twisted my ankle. You?”

“Dislocated my shoulder while doing a backflip.”

Meanwhile Liv was now resting on your lap

Looking at him with a smile on her face

And clapping while he smiled at made funny faces at her again

But then he noticed you were watching

And he was kinda making a fool of himself in front of you

(cue the blushing)

(so cute)

So you decided to help him out a little

"Thanks for putting her in a good mood again."

"No problem... is she yours?"

He didn't want to seem rude so he kept the judgment out of his voice, but you seemed a bit young to have a kid already.

"Nah, she's my niece"

"Oh, okay... Why'd you bring her to the hospital with you? It must be hard having to take care of a kid and get your ankle checked."

You looked a bit sad for a while.

"My sister left her with me as soon as I turned eighteen. My parents were never in the picture so it's been me and her for almost a year now."

"I'm sorry..."

"'S okay. Besides, at least I'm not alone all the time you now? I mean, it's hard to take care of a 13 month-old, but at least I know she won't grow up like I did... afraid... wondering if her mom was gonna come home drunk or half-dressed with another guy on her tail, wishing her sister would let her sleep on the bed instead of locking herself up with her boyfriend there."

He watched you smile as you looked down at the little girl in your arms that seemed to be a perfect reflection of you.

That was the moment he fell in love with you

Dark circles under your eyes and all

He got your number (yay!!) and had to work (read: pester you) for two weeks before you agreed to go out on a date with him.

Liv stayed with Harrison (after you checked that he was a good babysitter)

He took you to a nice little restaurant near the beach

They served giant burgers

Which you liked at lot

Conversation was easy 

He asked you what you were currently doing

"I'm working as a waitress in a little diner downtown."

He also found out you were doing online college to get your creative writing degree.

You told him about your family life. 

How your dad died in a car accident when you were three. 

How your mom was an alcoholic junkie and OD'd when you were fifteen.

How your nineteen-year-old sister had to take care of you for there on out. 

How she left soon after you graduated high school and left you with a three-month-old baby to take care of.

In turn, he told you all about his life

How he became an actor and got his big break as Spider-Man

He told you about his family and how much he misses them

How thankful he is to have Haz with him

You excused yourself to the bathroom just before dessert

And that bastard took advantage of that tiny window to pay the bill

You scolded him for that obviously

And tried to pay him back

He laughed and said no

Then he bought you a giant cotton candy

"Tom, seriously I can pay for my own stuff."

"I know but I like spoiling you."

You finished the cotton candy together while strolling down the beach

Then once it was done he threw out the cone and took your hand

The sun was just setting so it was like a picture-perfect moment

So he took advantage of that and kissed you

(so cliche)

You tasted like strawberry from your chapstick

The cotton candy you just had

You tasted like sweetness

And comfort

And home

You started dating officially not long after that

And that's when it all really started

You knew he was good with kids

That first day at the hospital told you as much

But you didn't expect him to be this good

Olivia was very much in love with him

They were practically glued at the hip

She constantly wanted hugs from him

He took her to the park and threw her up in the air while she squealed in delight

He picked her up and carried her while you were making dinner so she didn't feel left out

She sat on his back while he did push-ups

He'd kiss her nose every time he did a sit-up

They would have kissing contests

He kissed her cheek

She kissed his back 

Then he kissed hers again

And so on

Her first word was Tommy

You'd never seen him so happy

You, on the other hand, were not

"I raised you on my own ever since you were three months old and this is the thanks I get?"

They'd often fall asleep together on the couch

Your camera roll was full of photos of them sleeping

Her favorite thing to do was grab him by the sides of his head and kiss his curls

(a d o r a b l e)

He helped you plan the perfect birthday party for her

"Only the best for my best girl"

"I thought I was your best girl"

"Only the best for either of my best girls but in this case the youngest one"

She loved it

You're pretty sure he loved it more

But who can say for sure?

On your six month anniversary, he told you he loved you and that he had no plans on ever leaving you two.

He forced you to quit your job at the diner

"You're overworking yourself. I have more than enough money to take care of all of us and that way you'll be able to focus on your studies and travel with me since you do online college. Everybody wins."

So you went wherever he went

Including filming for Infinity War/Endgame

He took you to set one day

Everybody loved you

But as always, Olivia stole the show

They passed her around like a little doll

She loved the attention

It was quite funny seeing such a tiny baby being held by the mountain of a man that is Chris Hemsworth

She only referred to Chris Evans as 'Cap'

And Robert would forever be 'Tony'

But they didn't mind one single bit

"She just looks so cute when she says it, I can't be mad at her."

You met his family when the filming ended and he went back to London

Dom was ecstatic to finally have a little girl to take care of

"At least she laughs at my jokes, not like those idiots"

"You can leave her with us whenever you want"

Nikki was very happy to have one more girl in her corner

"I swear, if I hear one more second of golf talk, I'll go nuts"

Harry loved taking pictures of Liv

"She's just so photogenic, it's so easy"

You learned a lot of recipes from Sam

"Finally someone that won't wreck my kitchen and taint my food's good name"

Paddy liked playing with Liv and Tessa in the backyard

"It's nice to take care of someone for a change, I'm always the one being babied"

You made your relationship public while you were in London, a year and a half after you started dating

The public loved you

Because he just couldn't help but brag

And Tom with kids is the content the fans live for

tomhotland: omgggg they're so cuteee

spideysbae: the heart eyes thoooo

peterpprotectionsquad: i hereby declare that Olivia is the cutest baby to have ever existed and she must be protected at all costs

He took you to the Far From Home premiere

Your dress matched his suit

The fans went crazy

Olivia was living her best life in her little red and black dress

She'd gotten used to the flashes after Harry's numerous photoshoots

So she was just smiling and clapping a lot

The paparazzi loved her

The interviewers kept asking about you two

"(Y/N)'s the love of my life and Olivia's the sweetest baby I've ever known, I couldn't love her more if she was my own"

"So, do I hear wedding bells ringing?"

"Well, you never know"

That caught your attention for a second but you let it go in favor of posing with Liv after the paps all but begged you to

"Livvy say bye-bye"

She sent a kiss a said bye-bye in all her baby glory

They awed so much

His Instagram was filled with pictures of the three of you

Zendaya took a bunch of selfies with her as well

"Our dresses match, I have no choice"

She kept pretty quiet during the movie

But hugged Tom especially hard when she saw him cry on the big screen

The next morning, you were all over the headlines

"The sweetest little family in Hollywood"

On your third anniversary, he took you on a week-long trip to Bora Bora

Liv stayed with his parents

He took you on a walk to the beach

(déjà vu much?)

And proposed

Clumsily, but he proposed

How can a proposal be clumsy, you ask?

Well, he kneeled on a rock at first

"Ow! Fuck my knee, hold on a second"

Then he kept stuttering because he was so nervous

And in the end (after you said yes and he checked about five times cause "Wait seriously?") he started freaking out cause the ring didn't fit

But she wears the ring I used as a reference all the time!

"Um, Tom?"

"Yeah, babe?"

"The ring's supposed to go on my other hand..."

Ah, that explains it

The wedding was simple but beautiful

Livvy was the flower girl cause she wanted to throw petals in the air

Tessa brought the rings

His heart almost stopped when he saw you walk down the aisle

He was convinced you'd never looked more beautiful than that day at the premiere when your clothes matched 

But right now, looking at your smile and how gorgeous you looked in that dress, he realized he was wrong

He sniffled, trying to hold his tears, but Haz just handed him a tissue

"I came prepared"

You two adopted Liv

She was your daughter anyway, you just made it official

She started calling you 'mommy' and 'daddy'

"She called me 'daddy'."

Oh, the tears

To Tom's great delight, she started picking up a British accent, as she grew

It didn't help that she stayed at Nikki and Dom's all the time when you started teaching at a university in London

So they dialed they're British-ness up to eleven so she'd pick up on the accent

"Mummy, what's for pudding?"

Good Lord

After two years of trying, you found out Tom was unable to have kids

He cried a lot, and felt like he failed

You shut him up with a kiss and immediately mentioned adoption

"There are hundreds of children begging for a home and parents to love them."

You adopted an eight-year-old boy named Lucas and his five-year-old sister Cleo

Olivia loved having another girl her age

They had tea parties

And played dress-up

And forced Lucas to play the prince

You taught them to bake so they could have cookies for their tea party

And Tom found himself often ambushed in one of their games

"No, daddy, you gotta pretend that the big bad dragon took you so we can save you."

They rolled around on the floor and made 'pew pew' noises to imitate guns

Lucas was always quieter

He was your little angel

You two were very close

He shared your love for writing and literature

As well as cooking, to Uncle Sam's greatest delight

You often sat down on the couch, the five of you (and Tessa, obviously) and someone read a book out loud, while the others just laid back and listened

Cleo became very interested in Uncle Harry's camera and took a bunch of photos of her sister and her dad with the polaroid camera she got for her seventh birthday

Olivia still loved the attention and remained the bright and photogenic child she'd always been

She became a model, to no one's surprise

Cleo became a freelance photographer, which allowed her to fulfill her dream of traveling the world while taking pictures and earning good money

Lucas became one of Hollywood's best and brightest screenwriters

But everyone still made time for each other

Attending every single one of Liv's fashion shows

Every time Cleo showcased her pictures in a gallery, they were the first ones there

All of Lucas' films

Going to all of Tom's premieres and wearing matching clothes, per Liv and Cleo's request

"It's for the aesthetic"

Everyone was happy

And life was good

i’m pretty happy now, ngl

i need a Tom in my life

[itsapapisongo]

animam agere*

Pairing: JohnTen

Genre: Angst (sort of) | Fluff

Tropes: Character Death | Established Relationship | Non-Idol AU

Word Count: 2K

Warnings: Character death, profanity

Summary: In a single blink, a normal day turns to tragedy. With a snap, everything turns to ashes.

Notes: * To have one’s last breath. | Once again, as it often happens, the despicable fiend known as Writer’s Block as arrived at my doorstep. Since I’ve been listening to Infinity War’s and Endgame’s soundtrack and planning on writing something involving the Infinity Stones and loss, I thought writing about the Decimation—or the Snap, if you prefer—was an interesting way to practice the Art of Angst. 

Warning: This is completely unedited mess. ‘Nuff said.

“WHERE’S THE bottle opener thingie?”

Johnny closed his eyes and sighed, but he couldn’t quite conceal the small smile that spread across his face. He shook his head gently, chuckled, then turned to his boyfriend. Ten stood in their apartment’s small kitchen and titled his head in a this shouldn’t be this hard yet it is sort of way. A bottle of wine was in his left hand, the right gently placed on his waist as he read the label then glanced over his shoulder, toward the counter, as if whatever he was looking had magically appeared there. He bore a look of confusion in his face that Johnny found both adorable and amusing.

“You mean the corkscrew?”

Ten frowned, glanced at the bottle, then back at his boyfriend. “That’s what it’s called?” He asked, his voice laced with disgust. “Cockscrew?”

“Cork—“ Johnny enunciated slowly. “—screw.”

“Whoever named it that needs a swift kick in the ass.”

“Without them we wouldn’t be able to enjoy wine, though.” Johnny shrugged as he walked over and joined Ten in the kitchen. “So be thankful for it having a name.”

“Yeah, but ‘bottle opener’ works just fine.”

“It sure does.”

Ten clicked his tongue and rolled his eyes, giving his back to Johnny. Though he did this quickly, Johnny caught a glimpse of that half-smile his boyfriend often had whenever he was being playful.

“So, Mr. I-Know-Big-Words . . .“ Ten placed the bottle on the counter and leaned on it, tilting his head to the side. “Where’s the damn bottle opener?”

“It’s in one of the drawers.” Johnny idly gestured towards the counter’s drawers behind Ten’s lower back. “Don’t know which one but it’s in there.”

“Are you sure?”

“I am.”

“Cool,” Ten exclaimed, clapping loudly. He leaned forward then, though he didn’t need to, stood on his tiptoes to gently peck Johnny’s lips. “Look for it then.”

“You do know that you’re abusing your power?” Johnny stood there, smiling and not entirely surprised. “You can’t do that every time you don’t wanna do something.”

“You wanna bet, Chicago?” Ten raised an eyebrow, smirking.

Johnny blinked and opened his mouth to respond but relented, smiling so wide that his eyes were crinkled and barely visible. He looked away, unable to contain his laughter, shaking his head and rubbing his forehead. He opened the drawer, found the corkscrew—pardon, bottle opener—and proceeded to open the bottle. He could hear Ten chuckling behind him then heard the faint but distinctive sound of phone’s camera.

“You look so whipped,” Ten said, his voice dripping with smugness. “Oh, wait—you are whipped.”

Johnny threw his head back, groaning then laughing. He glared at Ten for a second before softening and chuckling, eyes crinkled, smile wide. Ten leaned in, kissed him in the cheek, slapped his thigh, and took the bottle away as soon as it was uncorked. Before he could protest, Ten was pouring the wine on two glasses. When their eyes met, his boyfriend winked and blew him a kiss.

What little shit, he thought as clenched his jaw and bit his lower lip. His boyfriend sure knew that smirks and kisses often won him over. He know how to abuse his power well.

AN HOUR or so later, the bottle was empty. They had opened another—Ten had reluctantly done the favor—and sat on the living room, not quite watching TV yet not quite ignoring it. They were too involved in a whispered conversation to care about the drama flick Johnny had insisted they watched. Tom Hank was putting on a damn good show and that for the most part was going to waste.

It had been a while since they had found time to just unwind—to be in each other’s arms or kiss or tease each other—because with Johnny working long days at the studio and Ten interning at the art gallery they rarely conceded these days. But these moments mattered and they were meant to be cherished and they had promised each other that they would do whatever it took to enjoy them. These moments were rare and neither of them was about to let them slip through their fingers.

The relationship had started behind everyone’s back—with only Kun and Yuta being in the know—and they had taken steps to solidify what had started as a leap of faith into the unknown. Having been pretty certain about his sexuality then suddenly feeling like he was still learning about himself, for Johnny it was uncharted territory. For Ten, on the other hand, who knew what he liked and disliked since puberty, this wasn’t exactly new but it wasn’t exactly something he had experienced in. Flings were nothing when compared to a committed relationship.

Almost a year had passed since their first date. Neither regretted their midnight escapades. Neither regretted holding hands in public, passing it off as friends being friendly and indulging in “skinship”. They knew who they were, where they stood, and who they loved. Once, during their fifth date, when a woman on a nearby table gave them a judgmental look and harrumphed at them, Ten smiled and waved at her. Through gritted teeth, he mumbled, “fuck this, fuck that, fuck it, and fuck the rest.”

And so they did. Why lose time and wallow in pity when you knew who you were, when you had embraced who you were? Love is love is love is love. That’s all that mattered.

FUCK THIS, fuck that, fuck it, and fuck the rest.

“Why?” Johnny asked, doing his best not to look at the woman without feeling a mix of annoyance and delight.

“Because I love you,” Ten whispered, shrugging. “That’s why.”

“Oh.”

His boyfriend shrugged again, unfazed. “You feel me?”

“I feel you.” He chuckled sheepishly. When Ten reached out and intertwined his hand with his, Johnny couldn’t help but feel loved. “I just feel you.”

“Good to hear, Chicago.” Ten half-smiled, caressing Johnny’s chin.

TEN HAD laid his head on Johnny’s lap, his body sprawled across the couch. He was on his phone when he spoke up, a worried tone in his voice.

“New York is a mess,” he whispered.

“I mean it’s a big city and—“

“Not like that, you himbo.” Ten sat straight and showed him a video of Central Park. A figure clad in metal tones of red and iron fought a giant brute. A good chunk of the park was made a disaster in a matter of seconds. The video ended abruptly as though the phone had fallen to the ground. “Mark had mentioned a good part of Manhattan had to be evacuated but, shit, I thought he was exaggerating.”

Johnny frowned. Manhattan evacuated? Aliens in New York? It wasn’t exactly strange but it was surprising. Still after six years had since the Battle of New York, it was oddly and eerily surprising. Since then everything had drastically changed—the world had expanded and everyone was forced, one way or another, to forget what they knew yet ignored two truths: humanity wasn’t alone in the universe and something or someone out there was certainly watching.

“Is Mark okay?”

Ten shrugged, though the gesture was small. “He hasn’t responded in the group chat since, wow, almost six hours.”

“Should we worry?”

“I don’t—“ Ten paused, unsure. “Maybe. Let me just call him.”

Johnny nodded, offered a thumbs-up, and stood up. He took the empty wine bottle and walked to the kitchen, humming a tune that was familiar yet eluded him. He left the bottle on the sink, washed his hands, and opened the refrigerator. Something to eat would be nice, balance the alcohol high, keep things flowing, so he pulled a small cheese tray Taeil had given him the day prior. He glanced over his shoulder, saw that Ten was making the call, sheepishly opened the tray and popped in a grape.

“Hey,” he mumbled, his mouth full, “want a grape?”

“Yeah, sure,” his boyfriend replied, though it was clear he was distracted. He perked up, disgust in his voice. “Wait—did you just offer me grapes?”

“Oh, right.” Johnny nodded. “Fruits are a big no-no.”

“You better wash your teeth. I’m not kissing you with—shit, Mark, are you okay?” Ten stood up so fast he felt nauseous. “I just saw something online. New York’s a fucking mess. Where are you?”

A strings of impatient ‘uh-huh’s and worried ‘okay’s echoed in the apartment’s living room. His pacing was faint but Johnny could still hear it. For about a minute, there was silence. Though Ten had stopped moving, Johnny could hear his breathing. He heard in his boyfriend’s voice relief as he assumed that Mark told him he was safe, probably away from all the danger and the destruction that had been unleashed mere blocks from where Mark had been.

“Call me back as soon as you get to the airport.” Ten sighed. “Well, fuck, at the very least text me.”

Johnny popped in another grape, frowning. “Everything okay?”

Ten nodded, but it was an apprehensive nod. The kind of gesture that said yeah, for now. He raised a finger that said one second, nodded again, then hung up. He sighed and looked ashen but definitely relieved as he threw his phone on the couch.

“He’s getting on a flight back to Seoul.” Ten rubbed his left temple with his thumb. “Says it’s best if he enjoys the rest of his vacations here.”

“That’s good, right?”

“Better here than the super dangerous capital of the world.”

Johnny nodded. He reached for something on the tray and offered it. “Cheese?”

Ten scoffed. He walked to the small coffee table between the couch and the TV and picked up his glass and the second bottle of wine. “No, wine,” he said. “Now pour me another glass.”

“As you wish.” Johnny winked, taking the bottle. He popped in the piece of cheese his boyfriend had neglected and munched on it, humming that familiar yet elusive tune again. As he poured the wine, Ten held his glass and bit his lower lip. “Bottoms up.”

“And tops down.” Ten nodded, winked, and took a sip.

Johnny turned, smiling, feeling a bit better. A frowning Ten required cheering up. And he was up for the challenge of turning that frown upside down and what better way than to—

Something fell—glass shattered on the ground, wine splashing behind it—and Johnny whirled, worried and ready to help. Ten was frowning, his entire face contorted with confusion and uncertainty. Johnny blinked and saw that Ten’s right hand, up to his forearm, was gone . . . but that couldn’t be—or could it? Where there was once fingers was replaced by empty space and—were those ashes or was it dust? Ten looked up, the frown replaced by fear, sudden, real, overwhelming.

“Johnny?” He asked, his voice trembling. “What is—“

“Ten?” Johnny reached out for his left arm but it crumbled into dust—no, ashes—in his own palm. He tried to grasp him by his forearm but only managed end up with handful of ashes. “What is—no, no, what the fuck is going on?”

“I don’t—” Ten gasped.

Johnny reached out and pulled him close, felt his weight against his chest for a second—felt his breath, felt his warmth—until he didn’t anymore. He closed his eyes and was washed, head to toe, in ashes. He was grasping at nothing but air and a cloud of grayish-brown ashes. Johnny stood there, eyes closed, trembling, unsure of what had happened. 

He felt numb as though someone had thrown cold water over him; his legs gave out and he collapsed, his back and head sliding against the small space between the counter and refrigerator. He could only hear his breathing, uneven and loud, and the faint rumbling of thunder outside. The thunder echoed like the dull roar of a beast that had been awakened.

“I feel you,” Johnny whispered between sobs and sniffs. “I feel you, Chittaphon, I feel you.” He hugged himself, hyperventilating. “I only feel you.”

All he could think of was the look of terror in Ten’s face.

[jaceyneedsabetterusername]

Superhero

Pairing: College!Peter x College!Reader

Summary: (Pretty much Infinity War but Peter is in college instead of high school) Peter comes back after the Snap to find that you not only survived, but gave birth to a daughter while he was gone.

Warnings: Mentions of drinking while pregnant, SPOILERS FOR INFINITY WAR/ ENDGAME

Word Count: 2819

__________________________________________

Five years. Five years ago, you finally felt like your life was coming together. You’d just turned 23 and gotten out of those awkward transitional years from high school to college. You’d gotten a fairly decent job while getting your degree. You’d met the love of your life, Peter Parker, in a Critical Thinking Through Argumentation and Debate course your freshman year of university. 

But then everything changed. 

“Y/N? Y/N, are you okay?” Peter’s frantic voice still rang fresh in your memory as if it were happening now. 

You stared at the New York skyline in terror, a large circular ship floating midair, “Yes- yes, I’m alright! Are you?” You asked, heart pounding. 

“Thank God,” He murmured. 

“Aliens?” You asked, already being familiar with his exploits as an Avenger. Knowing that it all existed was much different than feeling the imminent danger of it happening to you right now. 

You could almost hear him nod on the other end in confirmation, “Aliens.” 

“Dammit, Peter. Don’t do anything stupid!” You yelled through the phone, running your hands through your hair as explosions started ringing. It was silent on the other end of the line, “Peter? Peter?! I swear to God- Where are you?” You had to get to him. You had to make sure he was okay. 

“OH MY GOD IT’S MOVING! I think I’m going to space.” Peter sounded more excited than he should have for being blasted into space. 

“Peter Parker! Why are you going into space?” Even from where you stood, far outside of Manhattan out in Queens, you could see the ship slowly ascend back into the sky, “Are you on the ship?” Your voice suddenly lowered to barely above a whisper. 

There was a small pause, “I love you Y/N.” And then the line cut out. 

That was the last time you saw him. The last time you’d heard his voice, really heard his voice outside of videos or voicemails. That was five years ago when half of the known universe disappeared in what had come to be known as the Blip. You’d ended up hearing the true story about Thanos and the snap from Natasha when she learned that you’d remained. But nobody knew what had happened and nobody knew how to bring anyone back. 

That was also three months before you’d found out you were pregnant. You’d found out almost into your second trimester, which made you feel stupid for not putting the signs together sooner. But, in all honesty, you’d figured the missed periods and depression were from stress and depression throwing your body into a spiral. You’d lost almost everyone you loved. The world was thrown into disarray. 

But finally by month three, you’d bought a test just to rule out the slim possibility that you could have been pregnant (and by that point it would have been a miracle if you hadn’t miscarried from the amount of stress, lack of eating, and more than a healthy amount of alcohol some nights). Low and behold, though, it appeared that miracles did happen because six months later you gave birth to your beautiful, healthy daughter, Adelyn Astrid Parker. 

Most of your friends and family had been lost in the snap. You were on your own with the exception of when Natasha or Steve stopped by to make sure you were okay but they were both a million years away, agonizing over how to bring everyone back. You, on the other hand, were struggling just to survive and learn how to be a single mother, all while still dealing with your grief. 

But that was five years ago. 

Now, things had settled back into whatever normal could now be called. Schools had reopened, people started working again, there were weddings and birthdays and bar mitzvahs. You’d stayed in yours and Peter’s old apartment on the edge of Queens and had gotten an entry level job in your field that paid surprisingly well for what it was. Adelyn was almost five now, smaller than most kids her age, but still beautiful and smart. Everything about her reminded you of her father. 

You smeared the peanut butter and jelly onto slices of bread before pressing them together, “Addie! Lunch is ready!” You called to your daughter who played with Legos in her room. She came running into the living room and knelt down on the ground, immediately smearing all the jelly all over her little, now sticky hands. 

“Thank you.” She thanked with a mouth full of half chewed food, making a big show of showing you her mashed food. 

“You’re so gross.” You laughed at her, booping her nose gently. 

Just as you did so, the front door to your apartment swung open with a crash and you screamed, immediately lunging over to shield your daughter. 

“Y/N?” A scared, shaky voice asked. A voice that you hadn’t heard in five years. 

Slowly, you opened your eyes to see him standing there in your living room. Peter stood there, still in his Spiderman suit, wearing everything but the mask. His hair was disheveled and his face was cut up. He looked as if he hadn’t slept in days and like he’d been crying for hours. 

“Peter? What the- how the-” Your brain couldn’t form coherent thoughts. How was he here? Where had he been? You’d thought he died. On shaky, weak legs, you made your way to your feet and stumbled into his strong arms. 

He felt just like he did when he left. Strong, firm, like he’d never let you fall. Peter dipped his head down low into the crook of your neck and cradled your head against his chest. Hot tears began pouring down your face and you could tell by the wetness seeping through your shirt that he was sobbing too. 

“I missed you so much. I missed you so so much.” His fingers scrunched into your hair, pulling you impossibly closer to him. 

“Mommy…?” A small voice asked from behind you. 

You looked over your shoulder to see your Addie sitting there, still looking terrified at this strange man who’d just burst into your apartment. 

Peter’s arms slowly dropped around you, “Mommy?” He asked, eyes wide, unsure of whether this meant you’d moved on very fast or if she was his. But one look at the young girl and the answer was clear. 

You rushed over to your daughter and picked her up, trying to show her everything was okay. Peter’s eyes darted between the two girls before him and watched as you nodded awkwardly before gesturing towards him, “Daddy.” You admitted, chewing your lip nervously. 

He almost visibly choked. “Daddy? She’s… she’s mine?” 

You nodded, “She’s yours. This is Adelyn Astrid Parker.” 

Peter looked like he was just hit by a train. He’d already looked like hell when he came bursting in but now he looked like something snapped within him. 

“Let me get you some water.” 

**

Addie was sitting in front of the TV, watching one of her favorite shows, while you and Peter sat in the little kitchen nook, drinks in between each of your hands. “So five years?” He asked, still trying to adjust to this new reality. 

You nodded, staring down at your fingers on your cup, “Five years.” You confirmed. 

“Did you know before-” He questioned, scared to know the truth but desperate to know. 

You shook your head, cutting him off, “No. I found out three months after,” You snorted slightly, “I know, it’s really late.” In the old days, he probably would have teased you about it but nothing was funny about any of this now. You almost wished it was, though. Anything to break this dark cloud that seemed to loom over the room. 

“Can-can you tell me about it?” He asked shyly. Was that a weird request? To know about your pregnancy? It just killed him that he missed it. He missed it all. You did everything alone, without him, and he could only imagine how scary it was. 

You sipped your water, “Well, um, honestly, she’s kind of my miracle baby. I didn’t pick up on the signs at first. I thought my body was out of whack ‘cause of stress and I just kind of took a test to rule out the possibility but low and behold,” You indicated to your daughter who was blissfully unaware of everything, engulfed in her show. You sniffled slightly, “I really thought I fucked up, Peter. I was drinking a lot before I found out because I’d lost almost everyone and was scared. I stopped right when I saw the positive test but I really thought I hurt her. I don’t know how or why but she was born on August 4th four years ago, perfectly healthy.” 

Peter could sense the hurt in your voice and reached across the table to hold your hand, “You didn’t know. You can’t beat yourself up for that. And like you said, she’s healthy. That’s what matters.” He sighed and buried his face in his hands, “I am so sorry that I left you alone. I am so sorry that you had to go through all of this by yourself.” 

You reached across and gently touched his arm, “You don’t get to hate yourself for that. You were doing your duty and saving the world. You couldn’t control that you were in the half that disappeared. What matters is that you’re here now.” 

“Yeah…” He said sadly, looking down at the table. 

You squeezed his hand, “What happened?” You asked gently. Something was wrong with him. He looked horribly beat up physically but he also looked like he was in anguish emotionally, and more than just finding out about his daughter. 

His lips began to quiver slightly, “There was a battle. I don’t know exactly what happened but I was on a planet with... “ A darkness suddenly washed over him, “With Mr. Stark and this guy who calls himself Starlord and a few other people. We almost stopped him. We almost stopped Thanos but then... we lost. Half of us disintegrated and I was in this weird place that I can’t even describe. But there were a lot of people there. Then one day the wizard guy showed up and these portals opened and there was another war. And… and… Stark is dead.” Peter poured his heart out to you, tears beginning to overflow. 

You couldn’t even fathom what he’d gone through or what he’d seen. How do you comfort someone like that? Unsure of what else to do, you slid over to sit next to him and just let him collapse into you, crying. 

“Peter, I am so sorry.” You held him close, just like you did Addie when she was hurt or sad, and just sent as much love through your touch as you possibly could. “He loved you so much.” 

He nodded into your shoulder, “I couldn’t save him. I couldn’t save him.” He just kept murmuring over and over again. 

“Shh, I know you and I know that you did everything you possibly could. He knows that too.” You ran your fingers through his hair, feeling the dried sweat and blood caked into it and only imagining how it had gotten there and wondering whose blood it was. 

“Y’know, I know this may sound sort of lame but Addie, her middle name is Astrid. It’s sort of a stretch but I know how much you love Tony and even though you weren’t there I figured that maybe I could pretend you were when I named her. So I thought that Stark was like ‘Star’ but I didn’t like that so I went with Astrid. So, like I said, it’s really kind of a stretch, but I sort of named her after Stark cause I thought it was something you might like if you were there.” 

Peter sat up from your shoulder and smiled a little. In fact, he almost chuckled, “That is kind of a stretch but I like it. I love it.” He wiped his tears away and sniffled. He brushed his fingers through his hair and sat up, his eyes red and puffy again, “Can I meet her?” He asked, voice cracking. 

You nodded and smiled, “Of course,” You looked back towards the living room, “Addie, baby? Can you come here please?” 

Without a word, she stood up and walked over to you, looking back at the TV while she walked until she tripped over a toy. You and Peter couldn’t help but giggle at your adorably clumsy child. It wasn’t a hard fall though (and you know kids, they’re practically made out of rubber) so she bounced back up with a laugh and made her way over to you. You stood up and walked around to kneel next to Peter, putting on hand on his thigh and one hand on her shoulder. 

“Peter, this is Adelyn Astrid Parker. Addie, this is your daddy.” You introduced officially. 

Addie looked up at him with furrowed brows, “Daddy?” She’d never had a ‘daddy’ before. As far as she had always been concerned, it was her and Mommy against the world. 

“Yep, this is your daddy.” You smiled, rubbing small circles on Peter’s thigh with your thumb. 

“The superhero?” She asked, trying to put the pieces together. Peter was taken aback. The superhero? 

You nodded, excited that your little family was finally complete, “Yep.” 

Peter waved awkwardly, “Hi, Addie.” This was undeniably his daughter. She had the same curly brown hair and they had the same eyes. She looked almost like the girl equivalent of him. 

“Mommy said you were gone being a superhero and saving the world. Where were you?” Addie was trying to put the pieces together in her head. You’d made sure that she’d known that she had a dad. You’d even shown her photos of him. But you’d told her that he was a superhero who was off helping people. The last thing you wanted was for her to grow up thinking that Peter had just abandoned her. 

Peter looked taken back by the question, almost unsure of how to answer, so you stepped in, “He was off far away making sure that me and you and everyone else in the universe was safe from bad guys.” 

Peter watched in amazement as you spoke so animatedly to your young daughter, poking her every now and then for emphasis, especially when you talked about bad guys.

“What happened to your face?” She pointed at the cuts and bruises bluntly. 

His eyes widened and he moved to cover some of the abrasions, “Oh, just superhero stuff. The bad guys were tough this time.” He chuckled a little, trying to keep it as light hearted as possible and not remember details about the war. It was too much right now. 

“Stay here!” Addie put up a tiny hand before running off. Peter’s eyes widened in surprise at the sudden demand from the five year old but stayed there anyways. You chuckled as she ran off and then returned with a little toy doctor kit, one of the Doc McStuffins toys. 

Addie opened the plastic ‘doctor bag’ and took out a box of real band aids, “I help my toys feel better all the time. Here, this will help.” She took out a band aid and removed the protective seals with ease before climbing onto his lap without warning and stuck a dinosaur band aid on one of the small cuts on his cheek. He flinched at the less than graceful contact but kept a smile nonetheless. 

“Thank you. I feel much better.” Peter squeezed her against his body, feeling right away that this was right. This was where he was supposed to be. It almost felt like he’d known her all his life. 

You watched them interact and were almost amazed at how natural it seemed. Peter almost seemed more nervous than Addie was but you assumed that it was because she at least recognized him from the pictures now that the puzzle had been put together for her. You’d zoned out, not hearing them talk anymore but watching the way they smiled and how much more comfortable they seemed with each other after each second. 

Suddenly, Addie threw her arms around Peter again, like she would never let him go, “My daddy is a superhero. That’s so cool.” She stated with a smile, her eyes closed. 

You pushed yourself back up to join the duo, wrapping your arms around both of them, “That’s right. He’s a hero. He gives his all to keep everyone safe.” 

Peter shifted and adjusted his arms so that his arms wrapped around both you and Addie and he pulled all of you in as close as possible, never wanting to let go of his first true family moment. “I’m never going to disappear again. I’ll always be your hero.” 

[marveloustrauma]

so, I'm clearly seeing things that aren't there

okay...

I am truly ill prepared for the next MCU phase. why you ask? well, when the MCU first launched their debate film IRON MAN in 2008 I was but 10 years old. I grew up along side many of these characters, some I love more than others it's true, many who were not treated well by the writers/producers and some who have come to pass. while watching a video essay the creator pointed out how the MCU's titular hero and villian are both fathers. Thanos sacrifices his daughter in exchange for the soul stone and the 'greater good'. that's because in Thanos' mind wiping out half of all living creatures is considered a 'correction', a 'balance' must be kept and Thanos' is willing to sacrifice his own daughter in order to do so. in Gamora's (2018) famous last words "no. this isn't love". Thanos is toxic he claims to love his children but he tortures them, destroys them, harms them and kills them (both directly and indirectly).

Tony doesn't become a father until after the events of Infinity War, yet throughout all 3 phases of the MCU Tony Stark/RDJ is considered the 'father' of the MCU. In IRON MAN 3 Tony all but adopts young Harley, in CIVIL WAR & HOMECOMING this motif is pushed even further with Tony mentoring Peter Parker. seeing Tony being a positive father figure for so many young characters is clearly a well thought out part of Tony's character arch. this is even more important to think about when you consider how Tony didn't grow up with the best dad around (granted Howard/Tony's relationship needs to be discussed in a different post cause there's a lot to cover there). it's made clear to the audience that Tony had a difficult relationship with his father (in the comics it's flat out abusive, the MCU's writers treated Howard Stark kindly being more of dismissive and passive-aggressive towards his son). in the first 2 Iron Man movies Tony works to move out of his father's shadow, this is somewhat achieved in CIVIL WAR when Tony creates B.A.R.F. which allows him to work though the emotional trauma of dealing with his parents passing (as well as other things too probably this man has serious mental health issues). this progress is hindered towards the end of CIVIL WAR but Tony still manages to reconcile with his demons enough so that when he meets his father again in ENDGAME he now understands Howard a lot better. at this point Tony himself is a father to Morgan, he knows he can't be the perfect father (Tony has struggled in the past with doing the 'right thing' AVENGERS: AOU is a good example for this). if Tony wants to build a brighter future for his daughter and avenge the fallen he has to sacrifice his own life. and he does. Tony lays his own life on the line and is finally able to rest...

-- EXCUSE ME WHILE I FUCKING SOB REAL QUICK CAUSE FUCK I'M NOT OVER HIS DEATH --

unlike Thanos Tony makes the sacrifice play if Tony truly wants to correct what has been wronged he has to take on the full repercussions. yes it means never seeing his daughter again but Morgan gets to live, his daughter gets to live her life vs. Thanos' choices which lead to the death of many of his children even his most precious Gamora (who he murdered). Thanos is an abusive and selfish father. Thanos is very similar to the father Tony grew up with, the core of Tony's demons and insecurities and when faces them, faces Thanos Tony is brave, he is resilient, he is the protector. Tony does not give up to the bitter end telling Thanos the truth, "I am Iron Man". Tony knows who he is. He is the man who will make the sacrifice play for his friends, his comrades, for all living creatures and for his daughter. Tony is a good father, damnit his the best

-- HOLD ON THESE FUCKING TEARS --

for 11 years I called Tony my father. sure I had my ups and downs with the character no one ever has a perfect relationship with their parents and yeah, he is fictional. however, I'm an introverted kid with no father who will claim me and here is this amazing and wonderful character who is shaping my youth. idealizing Tony as my father is no different to someone else claiming their favorite character is their best friend or closest companion. your comfort character as they would say.

this is why I appreciate WANDAVISION so much! besides being pure perfection for a great number of reasons the Disney+ show captures all the many stages and feelings associated with grief. it makes sense for this show to be the sequel to ENDGAME (the show takes place roughly 3/4 weeks after the events of ENDGAME). Wanda is helping us all move forward and accept the death of the characters who were slain so that the story could have a 'happy ending', a win for the heroes and death to the enemy.

now sadly, I am still recovering. and that's okay. I know that even after their gone these characters are still a part of me, just like Vision is the part of the Mind Stone that resides in Wanda. they are eternally connected and bonded.

FAR FROM HOME deserves a mention ofc. The film focuses on many things so for me the time given on Tony/Peter's relationship doesn't go into full depth, personally. yes we discuss Tony's legacy within the film however FAR FROM HOME doesn't have the same gut wrenching stomach twisting effect as WANDAVISION (these are all personal opinions. mine might not be the same as yours). still it's worth mentioning as Tony's much darker past makes an appearance, a darkness in the form of Mysterio who comes rushing straight for Peter. a son bearing the sins of his father. in the beginning of the film this weight is crushing Peter, he is unsure, grieving and far too young for all of this. yet by the end, Peter knows who he is. he knows the truth and Mysterio "can't trick... [him] anymore". Tony trusted him, Tony beieved in him and for Peter that's enough.

where was I going with this...? oh right!

I'm sad and depressed as fuck. I am eternally grateful to Robert Downey Jr.'s for his portrayal of Tony Stark. I'm so incredibly impressed with this character's arch and I love the idea of two father figures battling it out with the loving, kind and supportive father like Tony Stark winning over an abusive nut sack like Thanos.

the MCU has this strange line that they walk. on one hand there are themes, motifs and stories that feel incomplete, not yet fully realized. just short of greatness. then there are these well thought out methodical almost philosophical at times stories that are being written right before our very eyes. I suppose this is what 'family entertainment' is. as a kid I looked up to my heroes believing nothing could harm them, because the hero would always win and get to go home. as a young adult I know that the greatest heroes makes the greatest sacrifices which means... they don't always get to go home. and... that's okay because I know that Tony can finally rest knowing that his family (Pepper, Morgan, Peter, the Avengers, everyone tbh) are finally safe. the recurring nightmare has finally reached it's 'happy end'.

on a side note...

shout out to Josh Brolin! Thanos might be a saggy sack of nuts but Brolin is a an amazing actor and should not be hated for his portrayal of such an iconic villian. remember, you can hate the character but you should also appreciate the actor for their performance!

[ordinaryschmuck]

Top 20 BEST Animated Series of the 2010s-1st Place!

And now. 

For real this time.

What is hands down.

The Best.

Animated series.

In the 2010s.

Is…

(Pause for dramatic affect)

#1-Adventure Time (2010-2018)

I mean...what else?

The Plot: The magical land of Ooo has many things: A kingdom made of candy, a sociopathic Ice King, and even a self-proclaimed Vampire Queen. Amongst all this chaos are two adventures: A human boy named Finn, the Human, and his magical dog/best friend/adopted brother (yes, really) named Jake, the Dog. These two then go on adventure after adventure, facing against the many oddities that the Land of Ooo offers. What type of dangers? Well...you’re just going to have to watch the show to find out.

Before I start praising the crap out of this show, there’s one thing I want to get off my chest. You see, I hate Top X lists that always end with “the one that started it all.” It comes across as lazy because there is no way the first story tops every other one after it. Case in point: when looking at the best episodes of your favorite shows, how often do you see the first episode making the top ten, hell, even the top five? Not often, I bet. And sure, you can make the argument that “Without X, there wouldn’t have been Y,” but is that even a fair comparison? Sure, Disney wouldn’t have been as big as it is now without Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs being a success, but does that make it right to ignore great movies like Beauty and the Beast (1991), Aladdin (1992), and The Lion King (1994)? Sure, Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope is the reason why fans love to hate Star Wars in the first place, but how often do you hear people saying Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back is the best of the franchise. And sure, the Marvel Cinematic Universe wouldn’t have existed without Iron Man being a box office hit, but with movies like Avengers: Infinity War and Avengers: Endgame, can you really say Iron Man is the best in the franchise anymore? To me personally, if you’re going to pick “the one that started it all,” then it better be something that can outshine “it all.” This is why I chose Adventure Time as the best-animated series of the 2010s. Not because it’s a show that practically sparked the existence of almost every show on this list, but because it really is that good of a series. Unfortunately, with a series that really is that good, there will be people who try to pick it apart. This is why I’m going to do my best to defend against some criticism that Adventure Time seems to face. 

The first criticism I want to talk about is one that hasn’t even occurred to me until I watched JelloApocalypse's video called, “So This is Basically Adventure Time.” In that video, I realized that Adventure Time doesn’t really have a proper storytelling structure. Hell, most episodes don’t even have a conclusion. They just stop almost randomly. But there’s a remedy to this problem, and it's one that I discovered somewhat effortlessly during my rewatch of the show. And that solution is to stop looking at Adventure Time as a series of episodes and more of a series of experiences. What do I mean by that? Well, while watching, you can either have a good experience or a bad experience. A fun experience, or a depressing experience. A philosophically brilliant experience or a randomly stupid experience. All of which can happen separately or conjoined in every episode. Personally, I like this style of storytelling because I’m more likely to remember the experience of watching something rather than the basics of what is being viewed. However, as JelloApocalypse has proven, not everyone is going to be ok with this style. This is fine, as everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Just remember that if it doesn’t work for you, that doesn’t mean it won't work at all. Case in point: there’s a reason that this show got ten seasons.

However, with those ten seasons come the inevitable seasonal rot. Which, in this case, can easily be explained. Halfway through season five of Adventure Time, series creator Pendelton Ward left and made Adam Muto the head showrunner. And where Ward’s style relied on being random and hilarious, Muto took the series in a more philosophical direction. Several fans were turned away from this aspect, but I like to argue that this isn’t seasonal rot and more of a series’ development. Tons of shows on this list went through their own transitions, some subtle and some drastic. Whether or not you’ll be ok with those decisions is entirely dependent on who you are. And personally, I actually enjoyed the direction that Adventure Time took. While I was entertained by how hilarious the original seasons were in Ward’s run, Muto caused me to think more intensely than any other show I have seen in my life. This is why, once again, I would like to point out that just because it didn’t work for you doesn’t mean that it won’t work at all.

But one thing that didn’t work for me, and one criticism that I’m inclined to agree with, were how some characters got treated in later seasons. Now to be fair, most of the characters actually become more interesting as the series goes on (Ice King, Marceline, BMO, Susan Strong, etc.) There are just two characters that got a little iffier compared to others: Finn and Princess Bubblegum. The main reason why Finn’s character seemed to fail is that the writers focused more on Finn's love life (or lack thereof). I genuinely believe that Adventure Time has some fantastic romantic relationships, but that aspect of Finn’s character is easily the most uninteresting. It’s even worse when an episode focuses on his armorous hangups through past...mistakes. I even heard that this decision ruined Finn as a character for some people, which I can totally see why. Luckily the show course-corrected itself, and by season six, it started focussing on an aspect of Finn’s character that is actually interesting: His family. Not to give away any spoilers, but let’s just say that Finn gets significantly more fascinating through this decision. Unfortunately, one decision that never got better was how the show treated the one and only Princess Bonnibel Bubblegum. This character started off as a gentle/playful ruler who was as sweet as her kingdom. Only to evolve into a sociopathic control freak who is obsessed with science. What went wrong is that the show goes so far as to say that she’s always been that way, even since she was a kid. I guess she just was good at hiding it in early seasons. Once again, the writers try their best to course-correct Bubblegum, but all they did was make her bearable than despicable.

But while Bonnie doesn't work for me, do you want to know what does? Literally everything else about this show. One of the reasons why Adventure Time is the best series on this list is because it has elements of every other show that has already been mentioned before it. You see, Adventure Time can have: Hilarious comedy, intense action, superb animation, creative ideas, compelling drama, catchy music, thought-provoking stories, good romantic subplots, gay romantic subplots, great lore and backstory, intriguing mysteries, and, most important of all, bacon pancakes. All of which can be handled in ten to eleven minutes, where most shows struggle within twenty-two.

But one element that stands out among the rest is Adventure Time’s serialized storytelling. You see, there are two different types of storytelling: Plotting and pantsing. Plotting is how it sounds: You come up with ideas beforehand and work your way into making them come to life. Pantsing is where the goal is to basically make things up as you go along and try to make everything connected afterward. The ladder is the route Adventure Time takes. Every single amount of lore, character development, and even surprise twists were thought up almost on the spot. And one might think that this makes things more complicated, but when I rewatched the series in 2019, a solid 99.9% of what’s written lines up. Sure, there are small things that get confusing or downright forgotten. But that’s the keyword: small. It’s the big things that the writers try their best at explaining away, which can be much appreciated. And while I can love a show for creating a well-crafted story, I got to give Adventure Time respect for doing the same thing just by improvising. But do you want to know the real reason why I stuck with this show? And why do all the elements mentioned before manage to work so well? The same reason why any show can work so well: The characters.

And yes, I know I just complained about how certain characters were nearly ruined in this series, but that doesn’t change how good they are. Almost every character that the show focuses on has a level of intrigue to them, and characters that don’t still manage to be incredibly entertaining, to the point where a worm’s butt can carry an episode by itself (Yes. Really). But nothing beats the central duo, and I’m being honest when I say they make the series enjoyable. Finn and Jake not only have such an entertaining brotherly dynamic, but the two of them are just so much fun that I can’t help but smile whenever they’re on screen. They’re easily the best thing about the show, as well as the most entertaining characters in it. This is saying something because Adventure Time has a LOT of characters. One might say too many. In fact, one could argue that Adventure Time suffers from the too-many-characters syndrome, which I can absolutely see. However, every character is so unique and creative that to this day, I still remember the Tree Witch in the episode “To Cut a Woman’s Hair.” From her voice to her design to even Tree Witch's creative and hilarious way to convince Finn to get her some princess's hair.

This brings me to another great thing about the show: Its endless amount of creativity. Everything that Adventure Time does is something you will never see anywhere else. From all the unique ways the show has Jake use his stretchy powers, to also having a vampire drink the color red instead of blood, Adventure Time is always a show that leaves me scratching my head wondering, “Why hasn’t someone else done this before?” And the best part is, no other show can do the ideas that Adventure Time has had. Because there is no way of doing it without coming across as a carbon copy. Which I can appreciate. Believe it or not, I would rather see an idea done once and never again, rather than repeated to the point where it becomes stale. Letting Adventure Time keep its creativity helps the show stand out among the rest and prevents it from being forgotten through time.

Thus, we come to the real reason why Adventure Time is the best-animated series on this list: Memorability. When doing a rewatch of the series, I was surprised by how many episodes I somehow remember. In fact, out of over two hundred episodes, I only manage to forget one (which coincidentally managed to be an episode I hate). I honestly don’t know why so many episodes managed to stick with me. Maybe because the show is so creative that it’s hard to forget. It's probably because the characters are instant icons that their impact just won’t leave me. Hell, perhaps it’s because the show is so gosh dang weird that my brain refuses to forget a second of it. No matter what the reason is, it all still stuck. And I’m not going to lie, I feel as though there are going to be a lot of shows I'll forget over the years. But ten years from now, something tells me I’m never going to forget Adventure Time.

Now that I think about it, there really have been many great cartoons over the previous decade. And we owe it all to Adventure Time. The act of being unique and creative with one’s ideas came from Adventure Time. The idea of being more mature and deciding what should and shouldn’t be for kids came from Adventure Time. The fact that a show needs well-written characters to tell a great story came from Adventure Time. Even certain shows were made because creators worked on Adventure Time (looking at you, Steven Universe). Is the show perfect? No. Far from it, even. But when looking back at the many great series we’ve gotten in the 2010s and the many great shows we’ll get in years to come, I realize that the fun will never end WITH Adventure Time.

(Especially since we’re still getting it with four hour long specials on HBOmax)

[buckyreaderrecs]

So Far Away: Chapter 6/?

Summary:  Bucky Barnes doing what he does best. Saving. Loving. In this particular case, the object of both is you. Bucky Barnes happy, healing, doing really well!

First chapter in series. Previous chapter.

Chapter 6:  A day in the life of Bucky, while he watches over your grief-stricken sleeping body.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes/Reader Characters: Bucky Barnes, F.R.I.D.A.Y., Cecilia Reyes, Sam Wilson, Steve Rogers Additional tags: mostly canon compliant (Infinity War and Endgame didn’t happen, Stark Tower still exists),  she/her pronouns, more tags/characters to be added with future chapters, hero Bucky Barnes, canon typical violence, warzone/disaster zone setting, Alpine the cat, other Marvel characters mentioned but not central to the plot Warnings: major triggers for death of loved ones and grief, possible trigger for food, prescription medication

Note: Okay, so Bucky’s suite in Stark Tower is mapped out in my mind. I have a sketched floorplan if you wanna see it? Lemme know in the reblogs/replies/messages. Also, there is a note at the end of this chapter; pls read. Love yas!

So Far Away Chapter 6/?

Gasping for air, you sat up, scrambled around in the darkness and screamed for your mum.

The lamp came on, lighting up the bedroom and bringing Bucky into focus. "Y/N, Y/N, come here. Come on." His arms were around you, pulling you to him. "Stop. Stop. You're gonna hurt yourself." He kept trying to secure your broken hand, but you were still yelling, trying to crawl away. Not sure what else to do, he let you go. You pushed yourself right off the bed, landing half the right way up. Standing, you looked around. What were you trying to do? Where were you trying to go?

You studied everything in the room, looking for clues.

Door. You ran, stood at the threshold, finding no answers in the darkness beyond. A dresser covered in books and journals. A record player, and stacks of vinyl. Beside table. Glass and of water. Clock. 3:27 am. A city behind a window wall. A bed. Huge. Bucky, sitting with his legs arched, defeated.

He watched you walk around the room lost and confused. But, maybe it was progress.

 …

 After you balled up against the wall in the lounge room, screamed until your throat burnt, you passed out. It took hours though. Bucky considered calling for Cecilia. A sedative might have eased your pain. But, your pain was so new, so private. He decided it wasn't his place to invite anyone else into it yet. So, he waited.

Once you'd fallen asleep and he promised to look after you, he carried you to the bed and sat by your side. It was quiet in the bedroom; Bucky hadn't felt the calm of quiet for a while. He missed it. So too had Alpine, apparently. The cat came slinking into the room, refusing to look at Bucky.

"Fuck," Bucky said under his breath. "Where have you been hiding?"

Sometimes, when he knew nobody was around, Bucky would talk to the cat like he knew what he was saying. That night, while you slept, he told Alpine about you. As he heaped a double serving of food into a bowl, he apologised for forgetting breakfast. It was the first time he'd ever forgotten a meal. When he went out on missions, there was a roster of people tasked with looking after the fluffy white thing that lived with The Winter Soldier.

"Don't like having someone else here, huh?" Alpine tended to hide around people he didn't know. He was a bit of a myth to the Tower. "Promise you'll like this one," Bucky told him back in the bedroom, climbing onto the bed to sit by your side. Alpine joined him. "Think she's probably got a bit of crying to do yet though."

By about three in the morning, when Bucky felt sure you were going to sleep the whole night through, he settled down next to you and let himself sleep. Alpine was curled into his back, warm and loving.

Bucky woke at first light, an old habit he was slowly unlearning with the help of excellent blinds and strict orders to F.R.I.D.A.Y. to not let anyone come calling. That morning was different though. He got out of bed, put biscuits out for Alpine, checked in with the team, then spoke to F.R.I.D.A.Y.

"That index of Y/N's friends - does that have phone numbers?"

Bucky sat outside the bedroom, on the floor where he could see if you stirred but not wake you with his conversations.

Bonnie, owner of Glory café; boss and friend; answered in two rings. "Hello?" Her voice was already desperate.

Bucky then realised he should have practiced or asked someone else to do it. By his own admission, as he dragged you to safety through the crumbling streets of D.C., he wasn't really a people person. Although, you'd very much disagree with that now.

"Um, hi. My name is… James. I'm a… search and rescue… officer," he tried. Bonnie was tired, but hopeful; she didn't question what he was saying. "I'm notifying… friends of Y/N L/N that she's alive and safe,"

"What?! She's- Does she- Where-"

"I can't provide any more detail than that. Sorry," Bucky said, hitting his palm to his head. Idiot.

"What? Why? Who is-"

"Please pass the information on to the others that work with her," Bucky added. Before Bonnie could ask how a 'search and rescue officer' knew about your job, Bucky said, "Thank you. Goodbye," and hung up. "Fuck!"

Bucky was unsure of when he'd last done something so profoundly stupid.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y., who else is in the tower?"

 …

 "I don't know… This is a lot to take on, man," Sam said seriously, leaning against the bedroom door frame.

"I know," Bucky agreed, watching you roll over in your sleep.

Alpine, who had been asleep at the end of the bed, maybe trusting Bucky's word that he'd like you, woke up. He looked at the men in the doorway for a good couple of seconds before trotting over to them. Bucky lent down and scooped the cat up. He nodded to Sam to move back to the lounge.

"So what do you need help with?"

"I tried to call her boss. You know, start to let people know where she is - that she's alive."

Sam smirked. "And how'd that go?"

"About as good as you're thinking. I froze. Made up some really fuckin' stupid cover story,"

"Wasn't smooth?"

"Wasn't smooth," Bucky confirmed, letting Alpine jump from his arms onto the kitchenette counter.

"Did you think about telling the truth?" Sam asked, watching Alpine with distrust.

Bucky snorted. "Hi, The Winter Soldier here. I've got Y/N. Don't worry, she's passed out in my bed."

Sam rolled his eyes. "You and Steve are made for each other. Pair of drama queens,"

"Okay, what do I say then?"

Crossing his arms over his chest, Sam sighed, looked around the space. "Where'd she puke?" he asked.

"Over by the plant," Bucky replied.

Sam nodded, thought some more. "I don't know, man. You've just got to be honest. This-" he motioned to Bucky vaguely, "-is a good thing. You're doing a good thing. They're gonna be happy,"

"But what if they don't believe me?"

"Aliens just attacked their city. They're living and breathing the unbelievable."

Bucky nodded; Sam was right.

They talked some more, catching up and checking on each other in that subtle way soldiers do. When Sam left to find food, Bucky sat on the couch and stared at his phone.

Bonnie, again, picked up on the second ring. "Hello?" she greeted, sounding more tired than before.

"Hi… Um, I called before, about Y/N…" Bucky expected her to say something, but she didn't. He took a breath and continued, "I just wanted to apologise. I, um, didn't really…"

"Who are you?" she cut in.

"My name is James, but most people call me Bucky. Barnes."

Bonnie laughed. "Bucky Barnes? Like, metal arm, Captain America's Bucky Barnes?"

"I'm not Captain America's… but, yeah. That's me,"

"Is this a joke?" she asked.

"No. Um, I can video call if you want proof?" Bucky asked. Sam's suggestion.

"God, no. I look awful… I just… Yeah, okay. So… What do you have to do with Y/N?"

"I… rescued her, on the day of the attack. And, uh, she's here with me now,"

"Right, of course you did. And she's okay?"

"She busted her hand up pretty bad but it's in a cast. But, ah, she knows… about Carly and Ellie… and… both her parents-"

"No!" Bonnie gasped.

"She's asleep. I'm just gonna look after her here,"

"Yeah, well… Can't really imagine anywhere safer than with the Avengers."

Bucky felt less anxious as the call went on. When Bonnie didn't wrap up the conversation, he kept answering her questions. He asked if there was anything he could do for her. She declined; insurance would rebuild Glory and everyone she loved was accounted for. And, there was nothing Bucky could do about the dead. 

Bonnie was just relieved to talk to someone who didn't tell her everything was going to be okay. By the time they ran out of things to say, they said goodbye and Bucky promised to call again with an update.

Bonnie had given Bucky enough courage to call Luke, then Elizabeth. Elizabeth sobbed, both in joy that you were alive, and in grief for your parents. All up, Bucky spent about ninety minutes on the phone. He knew more about you, had a little insight into your life before him. By all accounts you were living a life of relative happiness. Whatever it took, he'd get you back to that. However long it took.

 …

 Lunchtime rolled around and you'd not woken up. Or, if you did, you had passed back out pretty quickly.

Dr Cecilia Reyes came to check on you. Like Sam, she stood at the door of the bedroom and put on a worried expression. "Wilson swung by," she said.

"Told you about her family?" Bucky guessed.

"Yeah. Think he's just worried about you, taking this all on,"

"I'm fine,"

"I know that. She won't be though… I brought her these." Out of her pocket, she produced a pack of triazolam. "They'll knock her out, but won't keep her asleep. She'll do that herself. When she's up, try to get her to eat something. And drink water,"

"Should she… I mean, is there anything else?"

Cecilia sighed. "Unfortunately not, Barnes. You're doing everything already. But, you know… you should probably decide where she's going." She pushed off the doorway and made her way back through the suite.

Bucky followed. "What do you mean?"

"Well, is she going to stay with anyone you spoke to today? Or family somewhere?" Cecilia looked at Bucky. "Were you… You're just gonna keep her here?"

Not once since meeting you and bringing you home had Bucky even thought of an alternative to you staying with him. Cecilia saw Bucky's blank expression.

"Oh,"

"I mean-" Bucky went to say.

"No, no. It's fine-"

"But I-"

"Barnes, it's fine," she said, putting her hands up. "You don't need to explain. Let me know if either you need anything else, okay?"

Bucky sighed. "Thanks, Doc. Will do… Most of the team are back tonight, so you might be a bit busy,"

"I've always got time for you, doll," she replied, grinning.

 …

 Bucky Barnes spent most of his time reading. He liked non-fiction best. He read about machines, history, revolutions, and bugs. That's what he did all day, waiting for you to wake up. But, you didn't.

He ate the freezer out of ice cream, and the suite out of any other food. There wasn't much. "Gotta go shoppin', hey fluff?"

It was around four in the afternoon when Steve Rogers walked in, carrying what looked like an entire supermarket's stock.

"Buddy, you are my hero," Bucky said, pulling things from the bags before Steve had a chance to put them on the kitchenette counter.

Steve laughed. "Figured your kitchen would be as empty as mine,"

"Mmmm. S'like your psychic,"

"And word is that nobody's been in or out here all day," Steve said, reminding Bucky a lot of Sarah Rogers and her disapproving tone.

"Maybe people should mind their business,"

"People are looking out for you, Buck. Can't be mad at that."

Steve and Bucky cooked together. An early dinner or late lunch. Something that made them feel like kids in Brooklyn, living together with not much between them.

Alpine sat in Steve's lap while Bucky told him about you - the whole story, from start to finish in much detail. At the end, Steve rocked on his chair, tried to hold back a trademark shit-eating grin.

"What? What's that look for?" Bucky asked, throwing a piece of food across the table at his best friend.

"You-" and he stretched that one word out, "-like her."

Immediately, Bucky started to ramble. "Course I like her. She's… sweet. Doc likes her. She's got friends that love her. Doesn't deserve to be all messed up because-"

"No, nope," Steve interrupted. "Not what I mean, and you know it. You like her,"

"Steve, I've known her for a couple days. Most of that time she's been passed out,"

"So?"

"So, we aren't all the love at first sight, one true love, I'm gonna die alone, hopeless romantic, ya know?"

Steve snorted. "You get so bitchy when you're embarrassed,"

"I'm not embarrassed!" Bucky almost-squeaked. Steve's eyebrows raised dramatically. "Fuck off,"

"Whatever. I can see it in your face. You like her."

There was no use arguing with Steve. Bucky conceded. "She's… I don’t know,"

"I remember when you used to know exactly what you liked about a dame you were sweet on… You'd go on about how she laughed at your jokes, or her red lips, or how she drank whiskey,"

"Dame," Bucky repeated. Steve was an anachronism, still. "Guess it's more complicated now,"

"Guess so," Steve agreed. "Glad you found her,"

"Yeah, me too. She'd probably be dead if-"

"No, Buck. I mean, her. Specifically. I'm glad there's something good comin' out of this one,"

"Getting sappy in your old age, punk."

Steve laughed, shaking his head. The men shared a look that said they were on the same page, jokes aside.

"So, you gonna hang around for a  bit?" Bucky asked.

"Yeah. We got that meeting at seven, but I'll stay 'till then. Should I tell 'em you're not coming?”

"Yep," Bucky said, standing up and relocating himself to the couch. Alpine jumped from Steve and followed Bucky, finding a new place to nap.

 …

 Bucky spent the rest of the night watching things on his list. He started with Hercules, like you'd mentioned, then Sam's recommendation of The Princess Bride. Bucky fell asleep on the couch, old episodes of The X-Files lulling him to sleep.

At two am Bucky woke, ate a bowl of Cheerios, then checked on you. You were still passed out, so he climbed onto the bed and watched your back rise and fall as you slept on your stomach.

3:27 am and you woke up gasping for air. After the screaming and crawling, and after you'd taken inventory of the entire bedroom, you looked Bucky.

"You're safe. Do you know where you are?"

Your breathing was heavy, laboured; you had to push the air out through the gunk stuck in your throat. "Yeah…"

Bucky waited, not moving from where he was sitting on the bed.

The headache and haze of too much sleep had clouded your mind for those first few minutes. You were confused, stuck in your nightmare, but seeing Bucky focused you. You were alive.

But not everybody was.

Tears began to pour down your face again.

"Darlin'," Bucky whispered, sitting up on his knees and holding his arms open. With no hesitation, you threw yourself into him. "I know, I know," he said, holding you, letting you collapse into him.

For thirty more minutes, you sobbed. When you sat up on your own, Bucky held a glass of water to your lips. You put your hands around his and let him help you drink.

"What do you need?" Bucky asked, trying to read your expression and body language. You wanted to answer but were, in all honesty, numb, save for the pounding headache. "If you can, you should try to eat something."

Although you nodded, you had a vacant and faraway glassiness to your eyes. For a second, Bucky considered just getting you back into bed and to sleep, but who knew when you'd wake up again.

Out in the suite, you sat at the round table and looked over at Bucky as he stood in the middle of the kitchenette. "Sandwich, maybe? How 'bout… Anything, actually. Fully stocked. Thanks to Stevie." Bucky lined up jars of peanut butter, strawberry jam, Nutella, and marshmallow Fluff.

Something about the benign normality of a simple sandwich made you feel, at the very least, okay. It wasn't easy to stand up, but you did. You walked to the jars and picked up the peanut butter and Fluff.

"Girl after my own heart."

Bucky made fluffernutter sandwiches, handing you a spoon of Fluff halfway through. You stood at the counter, slowly eating. In the time it took you to finish your sandwich, Bucky ate his, made a second, and ate that too. It made you smile.

"I'll make a cup of tea, and we'll get you back to bed," Bucky said, quiet, soft.

Part of you wanted him to act normal. Be a little bit more cheeky, or something. The other part of you was so sure you'd never be functional again, that you were more than happy to let Bucky take total control.

"Okay,"

"'Kay. Milk, two sugars," he checked.

"How do you know that?"

"Café. We had tea,"

"Oh," you said, nodding, trying to remember something that had happened less than 24 hours ago.

Bucky started to make tea. You watched his movements, your eyes following him around the kitchen. When done, he nodded to the bedroom, and you began to walk.

Without conversation, you got into bed and sat against the headboard. Bucky held out the mugs of tea to you. He climbed in next to you and took his mug, blowing on the top of it.

You snickered at the action. It made Bucky's stomach flip.

"Excuse me?" he said, whipping his head around to face you.

"What's the point in that? Doesn't do anything,"

"Alright, well, I ain't making you do it," Bucky replied, grinning. You smiled back.

It had just gone 4:15. The sun would be up soon but the light wouldn't easily find its way in. Bucky finished his tea, fished his phone of the bedside table. "Sleep music," he said, looking up briefly. From speakers you couldn't see, a familiar sound began.

"You listen to lo-fi hip hop streams?" you asked, the disbelief in your voice animating you in a way Bucky hadn't seen since you woke up.

"Yeah, so?" he said, one eyebrow raised.

You shrugged. "Full of surprises."

Bucky smiled.

When your tea was gone and you were tucked into bed, that's when you started to think again. Feel it again. Bucky could sense the shift. "Here," he said, sitting up and grabbing the box Cecilia had left. He punched two pills out of the sheet. You lifted your head just enough to let Bucky put them on your tongue, then help you wash them down with water. You didn't ask what they were, but were grateful when you felt the swelling pressure of forced sleep shut down your brain.

Chapter 7

NOTE: Two things. Firstly, I'm thinking I might jump ahead in time, because logically the next step for Y/N would be to see her extended family, attend funerals, possibly even help with the planning. I'm not sure that this is something that would be entirely enjoyable for you as the reader of this fic. Let me know what you think? If you do want the painful reality of death mapped out like that, I can do it. Choose your own sad adventure lol.

Secondly, and still on the topic of grief, I just wanted to, I don't know, just maybe say that because of my own experiences with grief and loss (most recently and most painfully, my big brother), I know how weird it is. It comes in waves, all the bad feelings, and sometimes you can sit there totally normal, even joke, and sometimes you don't move for an entire day. I'm definitely using my own experiences to shape how Y/N is behaving. So, it's not that I'm writing her as inconsistently sad, it's that grief is an inconsistent effector of mood. I don't know why I felt like I had to explain that, but I feel better for having done it. *shrugging girl emoji lol*

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