#but they're both WAY too long to include in a different chapter

[logan-but-not]

I've been replaying Deltarune recently and interacting with the fandom a lot more. And I've become quite fond of Krisuselle (a polyamorous ship including Kris, Susie, and Noelle). To the point where I think it might be one of my favorite ships of all time. And since I've apparently got nothing better to do. I figured, i'd write a post detailing what about it I and others find so appealing about it. Let's get started:

Right off the bat, one of the things that makes deltarune more appealing in a shipping sense to me is the cast. Nothing against Undertale, of course, it's got one of my favorite groups of characters in anything ever. Everyone is so charming, they're far more complex than at first glance, and they all have well written character arcs. Same goes for Deltarune. But the major thing that differentiates the two is that Deltarune is mostly compromised of kids. Teens yes, but still kids. Kids who aren't really sure who they are yet. Compared to Undertale, where pretty much everyone had at least a bit of understanding of their life, the cast of Deltarune is far more nebulous. They're emotional, immature, dependent, and act like how any other kid would. And then all of a sudden, they're thrusted into this huge adventure where they have to decide the fate of their world. It's a massive responsibility that flips their entire world view. But through that journey, they learn to mature, reconnect, and accept their roles or even defy them. And as someone who is still going through the transition from teenager to adult, I identify with these characters. The self-discovery of who you want to be and what you want to do is something that I, and a lot of others have gone through. And one of the aspects of that journey is love.

Which is why Kris, Susie, and Noelle appeal to me so much. With only two chapters worth of narrative, we've already seen so much of how their lives has been thrown into turmoil. Noelle lost her sister, Susie is implied to have a rough homelife, and Kris has lost literally lost their own will. And yet, despite that, they each have a deep affection for the others. And they come to discover that as they traverse the Dark World. And each of their individual relationships is so unqiue. To the point where I could write whole sections on them. Which I will now do.

Kris and Susie get off to rocky start. They're both put together not of their own volition to do something they never signed up for, figuertaively and literally. And at first, they're pretty antagonistic to each other, almost like rivals, and understandably so. They're both seen as the weird kid, freaks. They've been ostracized from the rest of the world for as long as they can remember.

But as they venture through the Dark World, the both of start to ease up. They learn more about each other and begin to finally start trusting one another. And as they do, they start to grow into the heroes the prophecy foretold them to be. And they both play off the other's strengths to make them into better characters.

Kris inspires Susie to finally let down her emotional walls and allow herself to trust, and use her fighting spirit in a constructive way rather than just break everything she sees.

Likewise, Susie helps Kris to learn how to be a leader, and she is the first legitimate social bond Kris has made since Asriel left. They both make each other better, stronger.

And that's another interesting thing about their relationship. They're not archetypal heroes. When they're thrust into this huge conflict where the two of them are supposed to be the heroes, they reject it. It's most notable with Susie, but Kris does too in subtler ways. And even when they do accept their roles, there's always this sense of rebellion in them. They will be the heroes of this story, but they refuse to let anyone write this story but themselves. Renegades.

Susie and Noelle, on the other hand, have a very different relationship. One that had hints as early as Chapter 1 but really started in 2. At first glance, it just seems like the whole lovesick girl and oblivious crush stereotype (but gay so it's infinitely better). But like almost everything from Toby Fox, appearances may be deceiving. What makes their relationship so fascinating is why Susie and Noelle have affection for each other.

For Noelle, she's drawn to Susie because of her free spirited and rebellious nature. She's not afraid to break the rules or take a stand for what she thinks is right. It's such a contrast from Noelle where she's expected to be this perfect girl who does as she's told, is the top of her class, and knows how to take care of herself on her own. And we can see that she clearly can't always handle it, especially considering her past. In a frightening world where Noelle has lost the biggest crutch of her life, Dess, Susie represents everything that Noelle thinks she needs. Someone to help save this poor Lost Girl.

Susie, meanwhile, is drawn to Noelle because she was the one person who never hated her. Everyone in her life seemed to always be against her, so she lashed out, which did nothing but isolate her more. She had to learn how to fend for herself. At least, that's what she thinks to herself. But throughout it all, Noelle never hated her. By her own admission, Noelle would see the aggression and callousness from Susie and just offer a kind smile in return. And Susie always appreciated that.

The two represent what the other needs on an emotional level. Someone to help Noelle step out of her comfort zone, learn to actually live her life, and find the courage to stand up for herself. Someone that Susie can finally let her guard down around and accept genuine compassion and acceptance from, in a way that only Noelle can provide. And the thing is, neither of them had the courage to actually act on their feeling until they got wrapped up the Dark World. And it's not because they weren't aware. Susie may be a bit dense, but she's not oblivious. No, it goes deeper than that. They don't act on their feelings because neither Noelle nor Susie think that the other would feel the same. Noelle thinks that Susie would never like some random deer girl like her. And Susie struggles to believe that ANYONE would really like her in that way. They're two star-crossed lovers that will be forever stuck in this limbo of mutual pining until one of them finally gets the courage to confess.

But my personal favorite relationship is Kris and Noelle. Unlike with Susie, who's kinda seen as the new girl in town, Noelle and Kris have a VAST implied history. They were extremely close in their childhood. They lived next door to each other, their elder siblings were best friends, their families were intertwined, and by all accounts, they seemed to be happy. Everything from the overworld to the cyber city to the newsletters shows us that Kris and Noelle were once the closest of friends.

But then, something happened, something likely related to Noelle's sister Dess. I touched on her a bit in my Suselle section, but it really does seem like Dess was Noelle's anchor. She protected her, encouraged her, stood up for her, everything an older sister should do. And then, something happened to her. The details are a little unclear, but whatever exactly transpired caused Dess to go missing. And it's clear that this broke Noelle, which caused her and Kris to split up a bit. They were still friends, but they had to grow up without each other. It only got worse when Asriel left for University and Kris lost their will.

But then, the Dark World happened. And Kris and Noelle started to reconnect in their journey. And along the way, maybe uncover some new affection for the other. They're reminded of their time together when they were kids, when everything was so simple. When they both had someone who could comfort them. But things are different now, but that doesn't mean they can't still be friends. And maybe they don't need to face their struggles alone anymore. And that's what I love so much about these two. It's such a tender and soft relationship. There's never any big romantic display. They don't need it. They show their affection in more sublte ways.

Like when Noelle feels reassured when Kris says that they're friends. When she reminisces about their childhood toghether in the city. How she feels sorry for Kris for getting hurt by Susie. And how she is the only one to notice something is wrong with Kris on the Weird Route and how she vows to help them. Noelle has been estranged from Kris for so long that she thinks that the two of them can never be close again. But seeing Kris trying to reach back out to her makes her realize that they still are friends.

Kris also shows a lot of affection for Noelle as well. They encourage her to make a move on Susie because they know she has a crush on her. They constantly play pranks on her. They would play piano for Noelle when they were young. They make sure to look after her after Rudy asked. They get upset when we bully her at the laser gate. And they try to fight against our control in the Snowgrave route at every turn. Kris doesn't want to lose the last remnant of their childhood. The one friend they always had, no matter what.

And this relationship gets even more interesting when you consider how it diverges in the Weird Route. Because it only works because Noelle trusts Kris. We, the player, are using Kris as a pawn to force Noelle to commit horrible acts and even willingly put herself in harms way. Noelle has to try and convince herself that her lifelong friend isn't really making her kill people, including her friend. And Kris has no choice but to go along with it, despite clearly never wanting this. Nothing more than a puppet on our strings. And that's not even getting into the marital themes where Kris and Noelle are forced into symbolically archetypal husband and wife roles, respectively. It's honestly crazy how simultaneously similar and different the two outcomes are. Instead of the both of them reconnecting naturally over nostalgia and a shared adventure, they're forced apart even further apart by a new outside force. And yet, this strengthens their resolve to help the other. The same two friends, but twisted and warped into something so disturbing and sadistic.

Kris and Noelle's relationship is so rich with personal history and buried feelings that it's honestly almost overwhelming. There's so much nuance and ambiguity that it can be interpreted as romantic or platonic as you prefer. And yet it's so different from the other two relationships or really any relationship that Toby has ever wrote. They're two childhood friends who drifted apart over some traumatizing event, who both began to reconnect through a shared adventure and maybe discover something even deeper. It's one of my favorite aspects of Deltarune as a whole if I'm being honest.

And honestly, I could say that for all three of the relationships. Each one individually on it's own is so enveloping and has so much potential. But when the three are together, they just feel... complete. Kris and Susie, rivals turned to comrades. Susie and Noelle, a blossoming star-crossed romance. Noelle and Kris, long-lost childhood friends who thaw out their frozen hearts. Everyone of those dynamics bounces off of each other so well. And here's the other thing, no ever comes off as a third wheel. Kris acts as a wingman (wingthem?) for susie and Noelle, actively encouraging them to interact and open up. Susie is the catalyst that leads Noelle and Kris to reconnect and looks out for the both of them, making sure they're both safe and happy. And Noelle acts as a comfort to both Susie and Kris, allowing them to open up around her, and she's content to let them be the heroes of her story. They're all just kids who love each other.

And I think that's why this ship appeals to me so much. Because despite all the supernatural and mystical elements of Deltarune's story. The relationships of these three are really grounded. Toby Fox managed to write an incredibly endearing, and incredibly realistic portrayal of teenage love. Because that's what they are, teenagers. They may be emotional, they may make mistakes, they may become distant and closed off, they may be scared of what the world has in store for them. But they can still grow. They don't need to take on the world by themselves, They can learn to let out their emotions and be who they want to be. They can still learn to feel love. Whether it's for your partner in crime or the girl next door, your oblivious crush or your old best friend, your sister in arms or your childhood sweetheart. You can always find love. And there will always be those who can help you along the way.

And I think that's a really profound message.

[argothiathedreamer]

........

So one chapter has become 2.

[1000sunnygo]

Novel Law: Kikoku no Toki

I was expecting the translation to be released within today but apparently not?? So here's a very rough summary for Law novel, Kikoku no Toki chapter 1. Please avoid if you prefer reading the translation directly!

The later parts may be inaccurate bc I've only binged it...

Shorter summary:

Law's sword is broken during a fight against some rowdy pirates, but they manage to win the fight. The pirates had some kidnapped civilians onboard including a village boy named Hakugan. Law and crew spend a short vacation at Hakugan's village after releasing them. Law decides to buy a new sword.

Longer summary:

Chapter begins with Heart pirates facing off a group of pirates named Kalik pirates. They're 200 crews in total. Hearts are only 4 of its initial members, but Law's bounty is 80 million berries. He's already one of the most notorious pirates in the North blue. yep, I found it a bit odd too O_o

Law defeats the captain (had tough armor and wielded an axe), but his sword (the old one) cracks in half. He's tossed into the water by the wind during the heavy storm. Someone saves him before he passes out.

He wakes up in his ship's infirmary. Heart members glomp him and start crying. His crews have robbed the enemy pirates after defeating the henchmen. There were a bunch of captive civilians onboard the enemy ship, captured from an island to be sold off. They've rescued those people and gathered them at the sub's warehouse.

Law was saved by Hakugan, one of the captives. Hakugan managed to cut off his ropes during the commotion. Law inquires him about why he rescued a pirate, he says Law's eyes looked different from Kalik's, he seemed like a hero of justice to him. Law thinks it's ridiculous.

Law says he'll escort the captives back to their island, which was fortunately somewhere within their course. Law says it's an act of gratitude bc Hakugan saved him.

The civilians are all from a southern village in the Welbems island. The northern side has a larger kingdom ruled by some pirates. Btw, Hearts are all wearing orange jumpsuits. It was Bepo's idea. Law disliked it, but everyone other than Law decided to wear it anyway.

Law feels both humiliated and sad because of the sword. It was named Koshou, he always took proper care of it. He tells his crew to leave and takes a long shower while mourning over it. He has no way to retrieve it bc its parts are now under the sea. He only has the hilt.

Welbems is a warm island. After releasing the civilians, hearts decide to take a few days off to recover from their battle. The crew changes to summer clothes to relax.

We get to hear Hakugan's backstory. His parents have died, and he lives with his young sister. Some years ago, a butcher's shop in the village was caught on fire. He rescued a woman and child but his face got burnt. He feels uncomfortable about it and has stopped entering the village.

The siblings live at a remote home owned by their parents. The home is quite fancy, because Hakugan's father was a warrior who used to fend of North's army and the pirates. With him gone, the south fears the north's invasion.

Hakugan was contemplating about meeting the village mayor, they seem to get along. Law practically drags him to the mayor's home. he could sympathize with the fear of mixing in the crowd

Most villagers still fear the Hearts (because pirates), but the mayor shows gratitude. Hakugan proposes them to stay at his home, Law takes the offer. Since Hakugan's parents have died, they have two spare rooms.

Hakugan's younger sister is named Nanagi. She's completely against the idea. Law doesn't interact much with her but he observes her, he thinks she looks like Lami but a little older.

The two siblings get into an argument. Law proposes a solution that they'll stay at Hakugan's place for three days, if Nanagi finds them suspicious, then they'll move to some other place. They reach to an agreement.

The hearts casually spend the three days. The rooms were decided at random, Shachi and Penguin were separated. Apparently it's their first time living in different rooms.

By this time, Nanagi and hearts have become friends. Law still acts grumpy with her (got into a silly banter with her about it, pff) But he's relieved that a girl who looks like his sister didn't kick them out of the home after three days lol. Nanagi has given everyone nicknames except Law.

Hearts have taught Hakugan some basic combat skills in the few days. It seems Hakugan wants to avenge his parents, and guess what - Law gives him the "revenge is bad, they wouldn't want you to risk your life" talk. He feels awkward about it himself.

Law asks Hakugan to take him to a local shop so he can buy a good sword. Meanwhile, Hearts discuss how they can utilize their strength so they can help their Captain better. They're all good swimmers, so they decide to develop an underwater based combat style.

[piracytheorist]

The Forgers' Kitchen

It's very interesting to me to spot small differences between manga and anime in Spy x Family, considering how closely and faithfully the anime adapts the manga. That way, small differences stick out and sometimes I have the need to document them and share with the world!

So in the manga, the kitchen is basically a long room, with an opening on the wall that connects it to the dining area and living room.

The stove is at the far end, with the fridge on the left side.

Above the stove is a simple ventilation fan, with a cord to turn it on and off. The fridge has separate doors for the main fridge and the freezer. Comparing it to the height of the counters, it looks like it may have a base that makes it higher, judging also by this screenshot here.

It looks like to the left are the counters, and the red circle is where the fridge is. A quick search for "60s fridges" gave me this

so it's entirely possible Endo saw something like this that inspired him for the fridge design.

Finally, the sink is across the fridge, right by the opening in the wall.

A cool design, if you ask me. Washing dishes can be way more pleasant if you're facing a window or open space in general, than facing a wall.

The anime follows the design pretty closely, with two basic differences; the placement of the fridge and stove, as well as the design of the fridge.

This time, the fridge is at the far end, with the stove on the wall next to it, across the sink which is again facing the opening in the wall. The fridge is also of a different design, being the single-door type, I'm guessing with the freezer being inside it and smaller, like this.

And a small difference too. This time for ventilation there's a range hood (I hope that's the right word, I actually never had to use that word in English before so I never learned it, haha) instead of a simple vent with a fan.

It looks like the stove has three hobs, while in the manga it has four. It does, after all, only have three switches for the hobs in the manga. Though it has seven switches in the anime, with the one in the center being further from the other ones. That's a little peculiar, since the switches for the hobs would usually be close to each other, with the hobs for the oven a little further away, if there's any distance at all. In both cases, however, they are gas hobs and the stove is quite spacious!

Almost ridiculously spacious, I'd say XD Look how small Yor looks in front of it, it almost looks like it's two stoves merged together, with a combined oven space!

A few more details:

Note the Bondman magnet on the fridge! I do find the placement of the utensils weird, since they're mostly needed during cooking so you'd need them right by the stove. On the left side of this screenshot, behind Loid, you can see another small appliance. Judging from the above anime screenshot, it's missing from the anime. I checked later episodes too, and it's still not there.

At first I thought it's a microwave since it seems to have a glass window, but it looks too bulky, so I think it may be a countertop dishwasher. After all, the buttons are above the window, where dishwashers usually have them, while in microwaves it's usually next to the window. A quick search shows designs of such dishwashers that include windows to see inside, (though not from the era Spy x Family is inspired from, but I can get behind artistic liberties!).

I'm not super familiar with kitchen designs from that era, but it's certainly interesting to spot all the small details! Reminder that I don't read manga chapters that haven't been animated yet, so please don't spoil me for any further developments!

[the-once-ler-in-superjail]

CHAPTER 36: The Asylum - Part 2

Finally here, sorry this one took so long, we both got really busy this time but it's here!

Lineart/cleanup, flats & writing- @wiggybe

Layout/roughs, shading/lighting & writing- @self-made-madman

(TW: Mental illness/health/asylums.)

PART2

Once-ler: *He holds the Warden in his arms, relieved to have another moment alone with him, knowing that they're going to get out of here and that people are following his orders. At least he can have his glasses, they're just glasses, prisoners get to wear their glasses because they're visually impaired, this should be no different. He sniffs and wipes his tears with his hand, whispering.* I love you too. *Kisses the Warden's head and sighs out, hooking his chin over his head and bundling him up in his arms.* You're going to be okay, we- we're going to get you out. *He can't let him down.*

Warden: *His eyes shut, and as he floats in the vague numbness of what's been done to him, he absorbs all of Oncie's love, the feeling of his arms, the scent of his clothes and the way his voice vibrates through his chest. It helps to calm him, more than anything else ever could, but there's an instinctive part of him ready to have it all ripped away.*

Dr. Zazzerzump: *She strides straight into the room and states in a simple, curt voice.* Mr. Once-ler. *She has the air of a headteacher who won't be suffering nonsense, but because she isn't a blustering, loud older man, and hasn't brought the chaos of a crowd with her, she doesn't cause the same flinching reaction in the Warden as everything else. To him, this is just one more thing to trust Oncie to handle for him.*

Once-ler: *Pulls his head back from his boyfriend and looks over to the new doctor walking into the room. He knows this lady to be the woman in charge here. Good, that means he can sort this out properly rather than having to slap drones around. He doesn't get up though; he won't leave Edmund unless it's necessary, and he doesn't care how he looks holding him. If anything it only shows that he means the man no harm and that they do share a relationship.* Hm. *His eyes meet hers and he lets out an acknowledging grunt.* Doctor... *He looks her up and down as for a moment her name escapes him, but he does know all the names in charge of his cities' institutions.* Doctor Zazzerzump. *That's the one. He frowns, glancing around at the other nurses as they follow in behind her as if he's pretending to wonder where the Warden's glasses are, like he's making a point. Two male doctors join also, including Snickberry-Shoo, who all keep their distance.* Thank you. I requested the nurses bring this man’s glasses to me, where are they?

Dr. Zazzerzump: *Her eyes flit to the way the Once-ler is holding the patient only once, to take in the information and judge it. It's inappropriate, maybe, but it is proof that they know each other. Or proof that the patient has been so well-drugged that he doesn't know what's happening. Well, the Once-ler is a sane man, so it's presumably the first one. And yet, policy is policy for a reason.* The patient is in here because he proved to be a danger to himself and others. We can arrange for his glasses to be reconsidered, but he cannot have them back just because you asked... *She searches for a word that isn't rude.* 'nicely'. I will have the administrators put in a request, and he will be re-evaluated for his tendencies.

Warden: *He curls tighter, pushing his bare face against the Once-ler's chest so he doesn't have to see the world without his filter.*

Once-ler: *Feels a spike of adrenaline in his chest when he's refused, the thought of having to wait making his frustration build all over again.* That's not soon enough. Can't you make an exception?! Look at him, he needs them. Even prisoners don't have their own glasses confiscated. What could be so bad about him having his when I can supervise?

Dr. Zazzerzump: They could break - he could break them - and then we have glass shards, sharp wire, and an unpredictable man in the same room. The hospital would be liable if any harm came to either of you, even - *she anticipates the potential solution he might offer* if you were to sign a waiver. I'm afraid your friend must follow the rules like everyone else in the secure wing - no special treatment. But we can have him seen by our resident optician if necessary.

Once-ler: You’re already causing harm to him by treating him like this. *Breathes in a sharp, frustrated breath as he clutches onto Edmund harder. He knew these were the reasons. He doesn't care. Edmund is more dangerous to himself without the glasses. Besides, it’s not like he isn’t already drugged up to his eyeballs, bound in a straight-jacket, and not being watched over by a sensible and powerful man.* Don't you have security cameras here for the same reason? Just keep a closer eye on him for god sake! *He knows that what he's asking is exactly special treatment, but why shouldn't he? Parole exists so that those facing trial can pay to be in a comfortable environment while they wait. He raises an eyebrow.* I'll sign whatever the hell you like, if any harm came to either of us I'd take that responsibility on myself and see to it that no repercussions fall on the hospitals reputation. I can do that. *He tilts his head to the other side, frowning harder.* On the other hand, however, I can't promise the same should my requests be refused. *Hisses as one hand releases Edmund to slip into an inner pocket inside his jacket to fine his cheque book.* Fuck sake, how much do you want for them? *Looks at her like she just personally hurt him* He’s not dangerous, not with me and not right now, look at him. I’ll pay you extra if we could just arrange to have him monitored so that he can have what he really nee-

Dr. Zazzerzump: I cannot be bought, Mr. Once-ler. *As corruptible as the bribe of money can make people, sometimes those with the a more selfish agenda than just greed can be more malicious.* *She doesn’t care for money, she cares for maintaining an old archaic institute that she holds power over. Taking small wins, keeping control over anyone in her immediate vicinity, and insisting on her old fashioned ideals. And it just so happens the vulnerable patients in this place make those objectives a lot easier. She remains totally unmoved, as cold as steel, although she does for a moment feel a skip in her chest at the thought of more money towards their operations here. Still, she will have no preferential treatment for the wealthy or connected, even if the town's founder himself starts writing a check. She doesn’t quite realise that anyone, poor or wealthy, known or noone, would be willing to give up everything in their possession for the people they love. She holds a fundamental belief, a false ‘moral’ virtue about herself, that those of the mentally impaired are a danger to be hidden rather than human beings to be treated, despite having little to no modern research supporting her biases. There is no grey area that could suggest that the pain of others might warrant an empathetic reconsideration of the ‘rules’, she just holds onto these old ideas being ‘correct’. It’s as if Thneedville, and the people in it, are a product of a time where mindsets like this were the modern standards.* As I said, we cannot sign our duty of care away.

Warden: *He shifts, yielding as easily as a doe when Oncie's hand releases him to pull out his cheque book, but never stops gripping onto him. It's all going over his head, whoever that voice belongs to. Oncie is fighting a battle above the surface of the water while he sinks down below, and all he can do to avoid going (further) mad with fright is to hold on and make sure he never leaves him by himself. Right now the world is very simple - everything outside of their arms wants to hurt him or worse, abandon him to his own mind. Everything inside their arms is safe and loves him.*

Once-ler: *Sneers at her through his teeth in a low voice.* Ev-ery-thing can be bought. *He lets her speak, and as she does, he removes his thneed from his neck as if he's already made up his mind about something, not needing to hear the rest of it- because one can’t reason with a person who’s already accepted their own world view as fact. One can’t engage debate, even the most civil, with a person who has already made up their mind. The only thing that matters now is protecting his own pack. Something about the way this woman speaks is making it both harder for him to breathe the fire he usually does and at the same time makes him want to burn it all down with even more fury than when he spoke to the previous doctor. It isn't just a bigger dog biting at a smaller yappy dog, it's a fox VS a snake, both fighting for the fallen rabbit, and he's met a snake like this before. Thankfully the two women are nothing alike, but that doesn't stop the vitriolic, rebellious feeling in his gut needing to prove her wrong. He hisses again, almost scoffing at the irony of her words.* Your ‘duty of care’… *He glances to the Warden in sympathy, then back to her with far less.* Why is he so out of his mind?

Dr Zazzerzump: *Adjusts her glasses.* Is that a trick question, Mr Once-ler? All of the patients here are ‘out of their mind’, that’s what this place is for. We haven’t begun analysis or treatment on this particular patient yet, but he’s here for a reason-

Once-ler: That’s not what I meant! *He steams. Treatment of this sort has nothing to do with the rationality of the person involved, they shouldn’t be strapped up, sedated, and left in a cold corner for someone to find them- if someone ever comes to find them- without sympathetic care.* I meant why is he so sedated? Why is he all drugged up out of his mind?

Dr Zazzerzump: He was acting out, Mr Once-ler. a danger to everybody. We sedate all of our patients. It makes them feel better and it makes it easy for us to handle them and treat them. *Of course, she has no understanding of how these patients might truly feel, she’s just trying to come across as caring to hide that all she really cares about is the efficiency of her control here.*

Once-ler: *He almost screams out lout to her; ‘Even when he’s already in a straightjacket?!’ But he doesn’t, it wouldn’t help. He looks down at Edmund who can barely hear this conversation through water, he just knows Oncie is there somewhere and is trying to protect him, but if the man wasn’t here then the confusion would only be making him panic more as he looses an extra layer of stability and understanding.* He’s not comfortable at all, he doesn’t feel better at all, he’s scared. *Maybe he was being a menace, maybe he did deserve to be brought somewhere, but then shouldn’t he have been brought to a jail cell for disorderly conduct? Somewhere he can be held for safety reasons, call someone he knows, speak to a lawyer and at least be reviewed before taken to an asylum? Who authorised that he be brought here? Were they called before the police and just snapped him up to fill one of their patient cells?… He had no idea this sort of conduct was going on here, in his own city. This is old, archaic stuff. For as abstract as Thneedville is, sometimes he does feel that it’s oddly stuck in the 1970’s, as if it’s a product of a mind that’s frame of reference is a world straight out of the late 60’s. Maybe after all of this is over he really should review this place top to bottom officially and write up a report, not just because he’s been personally hurt by it and it’s employees, but because there might be things here he’s not looked at, that could seriously do with reforming.*

Dr Zazzerzump: *Says nothing. She hasn't spared a second glance at Edmund, she's been too busy watching the angry man making his demands and she clearly has no intention of treating these patients like human beings.* If you have no further requirements, I shall leave you two in peace. Visiting hours close at 6.

Once-ler: *Almost hisses at the way she ignores his genuine concerns.* That’s it? That’s all you’re going to say?! *He huffs, and in a sweep of his tailcoats, he turns back to the Warden and strides strictly over to him. He glares over his shoulder to the doctor.* I’m not going anywhere, I’m staying here with him.

Dr Zazzerump: *Suddenly spikes. He can’t stay here! That’s an obstacle between herself and the power she holds over everyone in the place.* Visiting hours close at 6 Mr-

Once-ler: I heard you! And I don’t care. If you won’t let me take him out then I have no other option than to stay with him overnight while I make preparations to have him removed.

Dr Zazzerzump: *Sneers* Mr Once-ler if you do not leave, I will have to have you removed by security.

Once-ler: *Turns around and folds his arms.* Who do you think your security is funded by? Who do you think your very institute is funded by? *He squints and tilts his head.* The Thneedville government? *He scoffs at her*. You think your governments have more power than corporations? Where did you hire your security, from the government or from a company?

Dr Zazzerzump: *Remains quiet and clenches her jaw.*

Once-ler: That’s what I thought. *He tilts his head to the door.* Go on, call them, tell them to remove me… If you really think they’ll listen to your orders over mine. *Fine. He’ll play her games of ‘procedure’ and ‘protocol’, she can make this harder for him as much as she wants, that doesn’t mean she’s going to enjoy it.*

Dr Zazzerzump: *Her icy demeanour starting to crack, she tries to hold herself together, keep her composure, refrain from forming shaking fists with her hands at her sides. By the second, the Once-ler is revealing to her what little power she has, despite her doing her best to hold onto it.* Fine. *He hisses under her breath.*

Once-ler: *Turns his back to return to the Warden.* You understand then. Good. I’ll stay here with him for as long as I need. *He won’t leave until Edmund is in his custody, until he can take him out of this dreadful place. Every part of him just wants to drag him our right now, hire his own security, pay theirs off, rip him out of the straight jacket and take him home, but the amount of chaos that that would cause in both the short and long term just isn’t worth the trauma that it’d have on Edmund. For one thing he’d need to leave him to get it all done that fast, and he couldn’t bear to leave him with them- who knows what they would do while he’s unsupervised? The manic of all the action and panic could have a terrible effect on him, while doctors are grabbing at them, large security men are shouting and the Thneedville public are watching him like a spectacle. It’d be cruel to drag him through that. It’d also cause more problems in the long term for them both if if he acted so unofficially. The best thing he can do is be sensible and assertive, plan his escape right by his side, make sure it’s as easy as it can be, and never leave him alone so long as he’s still in here. He’ll need important files and equipment to do it, and that’ll take time to arrange that if he wants to stay with him the whole time, but it can be achieved. Anything can be achieved by the Once-ler. He leans down by his boyfriend and tucks the thneed into Edmund's bound arms across his front so that he can hide his face in it. He leans into his ear.* I'm not going anywhere. *He straightens up and turns to the doctors, standing between them and Edmund and acting as a barrier while looking incredibly tall at his full height and the extra tower of his hat.*

Warden: *He curls up when Oncie gives him the thneed, and the scent of butterfly milk and truffula tufts proves to the animal in the back of his mind that he's still safe. Still, he shivers when he feels Oncie pull away, and buries himself in the fluff, focusing on the gentle way Oncie spoke to him as his sluggish mind tries to hold on to whatever it can through the grey and depressing mire. He doesn't even remember what he did to deserve being locked up in here.*

Once-ler: I didn't get to where I am today, to owning all of your jobs today, under the false idea that 'not everything can be bought'. *His hand forms a fist by his side, the other one pointing a sharp finger.* I've been nice, I’ve played your game, now you're gonna listen to me. This man is leaving this building no later than tomorrow.

Dr Zazzerzump: *Opens her mouth to speak*-

Once-ler *His index finger and thumb pinch together before anyone can interject, as if making a ‘zip it’ gesture.* I don't wanna hear anymore goddamn bullshit recited from ancient documents! You can either make this easier for me or you can make it harder on yourselves, either way I'm getting what I want. I don't care what strings I have to pull, he's leaving tomorrow. You wanna know why? Because if you won't comply, then I can have all of you replaced with people who will by just making three phone calls. So it makes no difference to me other than the fact you're wasting my time!

[The nurses behind the head Dr Zazzersump and take a step back, they straighten up with a spike of adrenaline in their chests, listening to the orders like soldiers. Dr Zazzerzump blinks at him, momentarily surprised and panic setting in at that threat, which quickly turns into cold anger to hide it. She looks around her staff and can feel her own sense of control slowly crumble as the medical teams have their attention stolen away from her by the Once-ler. The man has always been very good at claiming almost anything as his own.]

Once-ler: *Starts to count on his fingers. Without shouting, now sounding more like a very strict, growling army general. Suddenly they all feel like they work for him.* I want his discharge signed. I want his duty of care handed to me. I want his clothes ready. I want him off whatever shit you've been shoving down his throat. I want his goddamn glasses! And I want it all done by 3pm tomorrow because that's how fast it will take me to fuck up your whole system here and make it mine. *If he were an animal, the hackles of his fur would be rising and his teeth would be bearing, the gruffness of his voice growling through with that last word.* Every single one of you is going to be bought because all of these procedures you're following can be bought, so you better not waste any of my goddamn time once I slam that gavel down onto your precious procedures and shove them in my back pocket! *Points a finger towards each of them.* Get it all done by 3pm tomorrow and not a second later, because The Once-ler will not be late.

[The frightened shocked doctors and nurses behind Dr Zazzersump all stare at her with gormless speechlessness. They’re ready to skitter away and do everything he’s asked without question, because, SHIT, they need to get on this fast to have it all ready by tomorrow. Dr Zazzerzump herself is sweating, and every bitter bone in her body wishes she wasn’t. How dare he turn the tables on them and make such unrealistic demands with such a short deadline, they’d have to drop everything to get this done by then.]

Dr. Zazzerzump: *She attempts to straighten up at the same rate that the Once-ler rises, meeting his eyes and paying cold attention but not interrupting him now he’s on a roll. She holds rigid against his threats and swallows, but as she notices her staff becoming more restless at the mention of procedures and paper work, she can’t find a reason to oppose it. What he's asking for is technically reasonable, if unorthodox, so he’s trapped her in a dead end, all her talk of procedures turned back on her, and thrown the threat of a deadline at them all. Thank god that it is reasonable though, in the tightest possible way of tip-toeing around all the orthodox rules, because by this point not even she wants to deal with what wrath he might bring if she refuses him again. At the end of the day, he owns this town more than anyone else, more than she owns this asylum- regrettably.*

Warden: *He hears a man yelling, and like a dreamstate he simultaneously recognises the voice as his Oncie, and expects it to belong to a very different, much more violent man - because that's the man who would normally be in a locked cell like this with him unable to fight back. It’s confusing as his hearts instinct battles his learned neurological instinct. He curls further, clenching his eyes shut even tighter and reminding himself beneath all the numb and rubbery haze that Oncie is protecting him, Oncie will come for him, and that despite the sound of that powerful voice reminding him of things more dangerous, maybe it’s only so powerful because for once it’s actually protecting him. It does sound a lot like his strong Oncie after all. He’s safe.*

Once-ler: *Pulls in a deep breath and grabs the lapels of his jacket, pulling on them to straighten them. Clears his throat.* I will stay with him here overnight, I will keep the button alarm on me should I need to make anymore requests, no-one is to come near him unless it's for very specific medical reasons I'm unqualified to perform. Food, drink, medication, cleaning, anything else will all be handled by myself, and I want him weaned off the medication ASAP. *He raises an eyebrow.* You better hurry up then.

[The nurses scatter like a flock of pigeons, forgetting for a moment that Dr Zazzerzump needed to give an official before they can, but the Once-ler is right, they do need to hurry up if they want it all done on time. They need to turn the place upside down to avoid his wrath if he’s ready to leave tomorrow at 3pm and they’re late for it. How can the man work so fast when there’s only one of him and he can’t leave a cell? They have an entire team of people but they’re the ones frantically panicking for a deadline.)

Dr Zazzerzump: *Behind her, the doctors and nurses have backed off skittishly and darted off to work, trapped between the demands of two different dangerous animals who could both ruin their lives if they make a wrong move, but the bigger one clearly won. After a pause to collect her thoughts, Dr. Zazzerzump clears her throat and raises her hand to them. They’ve already made up their minds who they’re taking orders from now, but she throws out an official instruction, just to maintain a semblance of composure.* *Clears her throat.* Yes!- Mh.. Do as he says. For 3pm tomorrow.

*They scatter out of the door like spilled marbles, leaving the two alone. Then Dr. Zazzerzump continues.*

Dr. Zazzerzump: *Bitterly* The medication is a temporary sedative; it will wear off by morning and I shall make a note that no further doses will be required. There will be a nurse on call to arrange for overnight accommodations. *Grimaces, but tries to maintain professional. The decision has already been made now, all she can do is go along with it and appear as reasonable as she can to avoid receiving that harsh report.* Should you require anything further, the staff will assist you. Is that everything, Mr. Once-ler?

Once-ler: *Finally seems like he might consider withdrawing his claws the moment people start following his orders, especially when the woman confirms it to her staff. The fact that she doesn’t even question his power, influence or ability to have everything done by tomorrow in order to take Edmund out, goes a long way to placating him. He’d have really started ruining lives, he doesn’t care who the head doctor in this place is, if she’d said something like ‘we can’t guarantee, sir, that the changes you claim to make will be completed by then, if at all, and so signing documents and making preparations for rules that aren’t already in place would be a misdirection of time as well as possibly setting us up for illegal- blah blah blah.’ Good thing they all know when they’re in the jaw of the lion.* Yes. You can leave us alone.

*Dr Zazzerzump leaves with a slight twist in her expression, letting out a silent frustrated, but almost relieved that it’s over, sigh of relief. As she and the rest of the staff move away down the corridor and the door swings shut with a heavy thunk, she can be heard issuing clipped commands to everyone else. She tries not to rush too much, because rushing tends to make mistakes, but these things will move quick.*

Once-ler: *When everyone leaves and they’re finally left in private again, he turns back to Edmund, curled up on the floor, and all the anger sighs out of him (at least for now). Drops back down to his knees and leans over him, places his hand on his shoulder.* Edmund…? *His eyebrows knot up.* Edmund it’s me, they’re all gone.

Warden: *He pulls slightly tighter around himself when he feels the pressure of someone's footsteps on the floor beside him. The pressure on his shoulder doesn't make him jump - it can't – but he feels a spike of fear, in automatic self defence he tries to strike like a cornered rat and bite the hand. In reality though, he just manages to turn slowly and gasp. And then Oncie speaks, and he forgets everything except that his knight in shining armour is here.*

Warden: *He cracks open his eyes and looks up at Oncie, his brow creased with worry, desperate to get himself moving enough to talk but unable to force it.* O-okay. *He needs those bright blue eyes so much, but they're so bright he can barely look at them. His pupils visibly shrink against them. He shuts his eyes tight again with distress, hating the grey and how close he is to everything terrible around him.*

*This is so much. The cogs in his brain try to turn, and he thinks that he wants to break the bad feelings with a joke, or a flippant comment - it's not a conscious thought, but it's what the instincts in him tell him to do. He forces himself to speak again, his voice a hushed whisper.* ...I’m s- I'm really... Really scared.

Once-ler: *Sees the way Edmund almost tries to flinch and his eyebrows knot up harder. He can't even protect himself, it's so sad. Then that recognition comes and he swallows, his stomach fluttering with sad little butterflies but fluttering nonetheless.* I- I know, I know you are. *Sighs out and immediately drops down to wrap his arms around him and bundle him up again. He knew he'd get nowhere asking for them to release him from the straight jacket, not if they won’t even let him have his glasses because he's too unpredictable apparently. He was hoping he might be able to fumble with it himself once alone, but as he hugs him and feels around the back of it, he feels the padlocks and realises that not just anyone outside of the wrapped patient himself is free to mess with it. He mentally sighs, but just becomes more kind and gentle in response.* It's okay if you're scared. *His voice becomes thick but he holds himself together.* It's okay, but you don't have to be scared now, because- because I'm here s- so you're safe, and nothing is going to hurt you or scare you anymore. *Cups his hand around the back of his head and pulls him into his shoulder, and plants a long pressed kiss into his head.*

Warden: *His arms shuffle what little they can in an unconscious attempt to reach out and hold onto Oncie, but the best he can do is curl up as close as he can into the hug. Eyes shut, surrounded by his scent, he listens to the words and slowly translates them - he has to wait for each word to pop into meaning like bubbles from the ocean floor. His body relaxes a little bit, unable to protect himself anymore - no powers, no strength, not even his special filter that means nothing is real and nothing really matters. Suddenly everything matters, and it all wants to hurt him. Except Oncie. He's still here, he didn't leave forever. He sniffs, still tearful, and nuzzles into his shoulder and the thneed still tangled up between them. That kiss sends a wave of relief and love through him, and he realises without surprise that he's crying again. He shuffles again against the jacket, not enough to be considered 'a struggle', but miserably testing what it is. In a slightly thicker voice of his own, he asks,* What did I do? *He's obviously in trouble, he obviously did something, because he's in prison. If he wasn't so addled he'd be mad on his own behalf and flailing about it again, but all he can figure right now is that everyone's upset with him except Oncie, and that doesn't feel great.*

Once-ler: *Opens his eyes wide when he's asked what he did wrong, and he doesn't know how to answer. Even if the Warden wasn't sedated and put up a good fight, he'd crack eventually. He might go feral for a bit, but these people are… ‘trained’ to handle a dangerous, damaged psych patient like him. He's the Warden to himself, he's The Once-ler's soulmate to the man holding him, but the reality is that to them he's just another severe case like so many other names on a list and fading faces in the facility rooms. Their treatment of him is completely wrong, but he’s not a stable man, that’s the reality, and right now there's a lot of reality, there isn't a lot of Edmund. A runt might try to put up a good fight with it's teeth and it's ratty snarls, but in the end it'll still drop down under the teeth of a dog bigger and scarier than it, when it’s adrenaline has worn off and it knows it can’t put up a fight, when it's instincts tell it how small it really is and that it should just conserve it's energy and lie down. Edmund, at his heart, is a meek man. The thought of him being lost here, hiding fearfully in the corner of a room away from the dogs that beat the defences out of him, just like his father did, is the worst nightmare he ever could have conjured up.*

Once-ler: *His arms grip around him tighter, tighter than the jacket, and the way he feels him weakly squirm makes his heart break. He pulls back just enough to see his face, hand still cupping the back of his head, so it isn't heavy for Edmund to hold up.* Ohh... *His eyebrows knot.* It was just... *He doesn't even know what to say. He glances down his body and starts to shuffle them so they can rest against the wall in the corner of the room where it's most secluded.* You must be cold, let me help. *He shuffles up into the corner, carrying his boyfriend slowly with him, and takes the thneed back. He lets him rest between his legs against his front while he stretches out the thneed and turns it into a blanket. His heart is pounding and he's trying to swallow down an emotional lump, then he lays the thneed blanket over Edmund and then shuffles out of his own green tailcoat and lays that over him too to create a second, heavier layer to keep the warmth in. Pressed between Oncie's front, then the thneed and Oncie's weighted jacket, he wraps his arms around him and hugs him to his chest.* There. There, that's better.

Warden: *When Oncie cups his face, he looks up into his eyes as best he can and tries to understand what he did. Deep down, beneath all of his delusions, the current sedatives, the self-denial and the fantasies, he knows he's doing bad things. But if he didn't do those bad things, he'd be doing something even worse by letting down the terrible spirit of his father. To be good he has to be a good prison warden, and a good prison warden is vicious, cruel and controlling. But, because he's always been an empathetic baby, he knows that to be vicious, cruel and controlling makes people hate you and makes you a bad person. He can't win. There is no condition where everyone likes him and is pleased with him, so the only conclusion he has ever been able to come to is that he's just an inherently bad human being. But that's okay if he's louder than everyone else, insists to everyone else that he isn’t until he’s *delusional*, and tries to make them happy occasionally by making things fun. That's why he includes the prisoners in his science fairs and vacations and car races – bad, boring wardens wouldn’t do that, right?*

 *His expression breaks, tears filling his eyes as his mouth quivers and devastation spreads across his features. When he was a little boy, the scariest thing in the world was the thought of being abandoned for being bad. Now, here, it feels like reality itself is doing just that - he's been shoved out the way and left behind. He clamps up and tries not to make a sound, in case that's bad too.*

*He's completely pliable as Oncie moves them, trying to help but he can only move his legs and he can't move them much. When they settle, though, and he's covered in layers of warm weight and held all tightly in his protector's arms, reality feels that bit further away and he remembers that he's not been abandoned. Not fully, not by everyone.* *With a little bleat, he nods. It is better. His bare feet push against the cold floor beneath the blankets so that he's pushed against Oncie's front.* *After a moment, he finds the words to say.* Whatever I did... I- I didn't mean to... *That's a lie. But he'd do anything to be kept.*

Once-ler: *Feels his heart break when he sees the tears and tries to catch them with his thumb as he cups his cheek. He hugs him to his front, treasuring him like he's the only teddy-bear his parents have ever been able to afford, and clinging to him like a child hiding from the shadows in a wardrobe. Gasps at his words and whispers.* You didn't- It was an accide- it was a mistake- *He feels distinctly, innocently, devastated and sick to his stomach with guilt and worry, in an almost confused way that a juvenile would. As if he's at fault of doing something so bad to the younger kid living next door, who he often goes out to play with, but it's also his responsibility to take care of. But this time he convinced him to jump into the lake, climb too far up a tree, go too close to a wild animal, and it's his fault now that something terrible happened to him, and he's terrified of being told off by both their mom’s. So he just hides in the woods with him, trying to fix it and not knowing how, and just telling him that he's okay and everything will be fine, but he also feels sick with horror. His voice breaks.* But- but I'm going to fix it- I will! I'll fix it!

*He gasps as tears form in his own eyes and he curls around him. He's letting him down, he can't do anything right, he can't even get him out of this place in a city that be basically owns.* I- I'm so sorry- It's my fault. *His expression breaks down and he pulls him to his front, hooking his head over his shoulder and shaking it with guilt. He's useless. He can't even protect him from his own damn city.* I'm sorry, I'm s- so, so sorry, Edmund. I'm so sorry.

Warden: *He nuzzles against him, drying his tears on Oncie's front and pressing against him for safety until his muscles start to soften - he can't keep the effort up for very long, but he always stays hugged up in his arms. He lets out a soft hiccup when he hears that it was an accident, or a mistake, whatever it was. He can't remember how he ended up here - every memory is fuzzy and indistinct like a dream that fades faster the more he tries to grasp for it - but at least Oncie doesn't blame him. Right now that's the very final thing that matters, like the last star still burning in the sky. Everything else has failed, but Oncie is always there, and he never leaves him.*

*He doesn't quite understand when Oncie says he'll 'fix it'. He doesn't know what there is to fix, because prison is an inevitable force that can't be changed. It's like saying you'll fix a sunset. His eyes crack open again, wet eyelashes fluttering against his boyfriend's neck while his own dears don’t cease.* Hm? *The cogs try to turn again.* W-Why? *His voice is hushed, but it's still his usual loopy, lyrical lisp, with a quiver of sadness.* You're here. *That is the only thing that matters. The only thing.*

Once-ler: *Looks down at him with wet eyelashes too.* Because, well because you're still here too and I think it's my fault you are. *He sniffs and begins wiping the Warden's tears away with his hand, since he can't do it himself.* But- but like I said, I'll fix it. *He makes sure not to talk too quickly, to let the words sink in.* I'm going to take you back home, I'm going to make you feel better. It just- *he hiccups as another tear appears and he wipes it away on his shoulder,* It just won't be right now. But I'm not going anywhere, I'm staying here with you until I can make everything okay again- and then forever after that.

Warden: *He looks up at Oncie with half-lidded eyes, still tight enough in the corners that the middle-aged creases around them are visible, but more relaxed than they have been thus far. He blinks slowly when Oncie wipes his tears away, foggy from the sedatives, believing everything he says because he has no choice but to do so, and trusting him because how could he not? He knows in his heart that nobody should like him enough to be here, but Oncie is because they're in love.*

*His subconscious can't quite believe it when he's told they're going to get out of here, not because he doesn't trust Oncie but because he's never known a reality where a prison wasn't an ultimate and inescapable thing. If he was sober he'd believe him, but he can't right now. However, when he says he'll be with him forever 'after that'... something shifts. To hear that Oncie wants to be with him forever shakes up the foundations he otherwise fully believed in, and the idea that there might be a forever after this suddenly becomes plausible. His eyes widen just a little bit more - even as glassy as they are - and a smile slowly spreads across his face, welling up with hopeful, emotional, grief-stricken tears as raw feeling is able to bleed up through the sedation.* Ye... yeah? *He sounds so hopeful, and with the tone of a soldier wanting someone to keep talking to him as he bleeds out on the battlefield, his chest shuddering with emotional hiccups. Nuzzled up against him, able to feel his heartbeat and bury in his scent, looking up at him and hearing his voice - if he can't have his glasses, he can put a new barrier between himself and the rest of reality.*

Once-ler: *His heart breaks and clutches at the hope in the Warden's voice, seeing him smile makes some ray of hope bloom in him too. Nothing can stop the happiness that the Warden brings to the Once-ler when he smiles, no amount of sedatives or guilt, when the man shows that grin, shows the cute gap in his teeth and has that hope in his eyes, it can’t stop Oncie from smiling back to greet him. As his eyes well up again with painful love at the way the Warden’s overflow, he smiles a little too.* Ye-hes...* He almost sobs out silently, between his quivering, smiling lips. He sniffs, then leans in slowly, gently cups Edmunds cheek to tilt towards him, and presses his lips to his. The kiss lingers in softness, barely any pressure applied but the sentiment still clear. His arms squeeze him tenderly a little bit, and after he pulls away he gazes into his eyes and replies in a low voice.* Yes. I promise.

Warden: *He drinks in Oncie's smile like it's sunlight, fortifying him a little better and feeding that faith that everything is going to be alright. He can't envision what it might look like (which spooks him, because he has a very vivid imagination) but he believes that he'll feel better soon. Like a feedback loop, Oncie's returned smile only makes his bigger too. Then they kiss, and under the sedatives it feels like his stomach has erupted like an underwater volcano, something hot and wild and frantically desperate, dampened by a thick layer of vacuum, but unmistakeably there. It feels like he’s been kissed for the very first time, by the only person he’ll love for the rest of his life. It takes him a second to react before his lips twitch and then he's kissing back too - with a similar light pressure, but still very much a presence. Oncie is here, and Oncie loves him, he’s been saved. They draw back, and he looks up at him with utter trust, wide and glassy-eyed, but believing in him as the most powerful force of nature to exist. His eyes might be foggy, but his smile shines through for him.*

Once-ler: *Pulls away from the kiss and adores the smile on Edmunds face. He desperately needs that belief- because no-one else has ever believed in him. Strokes his thumb over his cheek as he cups his face and he gazes into his eyes, wiping away some more tears for his boyfriend. His eyebrows knot up as he blinks his own away and he sighs out sadly.* My little bunny... *Kisses his forehead again and tilts his head in concern, squinting his own eyes as if trying to stop them from being so bright, because he knows they're bright for the Warden without his glasses.* Do your eyes hurt?

Warden: *The combination of Oncie's gentle handling, the safe weight of the covers and the kind tone of his voice softens the Warden's body until he's a warm, heavy weight against his front. He still squints as he looks up into Oncie's eyes, but he doesn't want to lose him by shutting his own.* *It takes him a moment to translate the question, especially since he's still glowing over the kind and loving pet-name, but then he replies quietly,* Mmhmm... a little. *He doesn't care anymore, though. As long as his world is so small that it's only the two of them, he can survive even if they do ache.* I-it's okay.

Once-ler: *Eyebrows knot up in sympathy.* I can't get your glasses but- *Reaches up above his top hat where his sunglasses rest on his head and takes them, while also removing his hat and placing it down.* You can wear mine if it makes you more comfortable. *He helps him try them on, knowing that they're not yellow lenses so can't make anything warmer, but they are dark and so might helps soothe some of the brightness or overwhelming peripheral vision. The weight of glasses on his face might also just provide something of a placebo effect, who knows?* Does that feel better, or no?

Warden: *He watches with glassy docility as Oncie places the glasses on his face, and as darkness falls over his vision he blinks in curiosity. Then the unseen tension in his shoulders relax and the lines around his eyes soften. That feels much better - even if they still aren't right and don't make him feel like he's in his own little fantasy world, he does at least have the separation and some rest for his weak eyes.*

*He smiles up at him from behind his sunglasses, looking quite the picture in his colourless hospital clothes, restraints, and Oncie's sunglasses.* Much better. *He shuffles against him, unable to inch any closer but just wanting to feel the action of drawing nearer to him anyway.* Thank you... *He thanks him as innocently as a child knowing to be polite, but with all the love they share together.*

Once-ler: *Gently smiles when he sees that it's made him feel somewhat better.* Good~ *Leans down and kisses his forehead.* You're welcome. *His stomach squirms as he feels Edmund shift and for a moment wonders if he's uncomfortable, but then he settles against him.* They suit you. *He says with a quiet chuckle, wanting to ease some tension with a playful compliment.

Warden: *Blinks at Oncie with his own, slightly delirious, giggle. He looks up at him with endless gratitude, even just for the slight attempt at play with the compliment, because any amount of play is a good distraction away from bad feelings for the Warden.*

Once-ler: *He smiles back with depth behind his gaze. His heart then skips a beat as he thinks about saying it again, and maybe hearing it back, although he wouldn't worry if he doesn't because knows now that he's capable of it at least. His arms squeeze around him gently, lovingly and he mumbles by his ear.* I love you.

Warden: *He's so glad he's squeezed back, too. He wants that tangible sense of being as close as possible, so his senses are full with the fact that he's protected - because it's really spooky being unable to do anything to defend himself. When he hears those three words again, his body rises with a deep breath of relief and a rush of giddy - if woozy - happiness. Hearing those words still doesn't feel real, those words never applied to him before this man came along, and on some foggy level he understands that even now in all this bad feeling Oncie still wants him enough to be here and say that. Emotion rises in the back of his throat and for a moment his heart flutters. He loves him too.*

*He wants to say those words back. In the addled and muzzy confusion of the past few hours, he's not sure if he's ever been able to or not, but those are also dangerous words that might mean something very bad happens if he says them out loud. He doesn't want to bring down an axe on Oncie right when they're at their weakest, but at the same time he wants to say it so bad.* I-I... *He swallows, then quickly nods as a lump rises in his throat. Silently, he begs Oncie to understand.*

Once-ler: *His hand rises into the Warden's hair and he strokes his fingers through it. He smiles as he watches him try to reply, and doesn't force him, the fact that he's trying to is proof enough, it always has been. His stomach flutters and he leans down to press his lips against his head. He adds quietly when the Warden stops himself.* I know.

Warden: *He's so relieved to hear that Oncie doesn't need him to say it. If he did, the pressure would be too much, especially right now, and he wouldn't know what to do to make it go away. As it is, rather than struggle with the darkness, he's able to float in his arms, and even though he's far from home and can't move his body and doesn't know what to do, he's still kind of cosy. Even a little bit happy.*

*A few moments ago, he said those words because he wasn't sure if he'd ever see Oncie again, and if Oncie was getting away from him then... he was escaping, so maybe he'd hear them and wouldn't be hurt. That was the thought process, the desperation, that managed to coax those words out of him. As he clings to his soulmate's front as best he can, calmer and more aware that they're both here and both 'in danger', he isn't sure they have that freedom. A big man with an axe might enter at any moment. But somehow he still feels like Oncie might be a bigger man. He tilts his head closer to Oncie's chest and says very quietly, forcing the words forward,* A-are we safe?

Once-ler: *His hand comes round and clutches his head protectively when he feels him tilt towards his chest, and when he asks that question he opens his mouth to reply, but then a quick knock taps against the door and the sound of locks clicking with keys echoes through. His attention flicks to it and his grip tightens around Edmund, not to worry him but to make him aware he's protected. He stares towards the incoming sound like a wolf ready to pounce with sharp eyes, ready to snarl at the threat. But he suddenly remembers to collect himself.*

*The knock isn't so much of a request to enter as it is a warning someone is entering, the kind of half assed knock an aged mother gives on her teenage sons bedroom door before sweeping in to dump a pile of laundry on the bed. It's not so much of a knock and entry as it is two hard taps and the immediate creak of the metal hospital door as it sweeps open and white light floods through. An older, plumper woman enters with a younger nurse by her side. The former has been a carer for forty years, the latter didn't want to come back here alone.*

Older nurse: Evenin' Mr. Once-ler, sorry to disturb, but we've brought the overnight stuff by instruction of Dr. Zazzerzump. *She has bags under her eyes, her voice is nasally and she speaks her words with a slow drawl. She's a chunky, round figure and is the type of old nurse who has changed so many bedpans over the years that nothing disgusts or surprises her anymore. Although some patients occasionally do, including this one, but she's good at brushing it off and getting on with her job.* C'mon Lissie! *She enters further into the room holding a large roll of bedding like a lady Viking shifting a boulder. Lessie, a younger, fairly new nurse shuffles in hesitantly after her with pillows.* Do you want it assem-ba-lin' for you, Sir?

Warden: *Suddenly there's noise and voices and loud rattling, and it hits him all wrong because his brain can't process things properly right now. If he was by himself he'd panic and fear would strike and thrash him at them like a prey animal caught in a net. Flinching at and away from them somewhere between impulsive attempts to snap defensively and simply shriek from fright- or, that's what he'd think he'd be doing. In reality the sedative is too much to let him do anything shake out of fear and try to hiss. But his instincts are different now that there's someone else to take care of him, a bigger predator able to fight for him, and so that panicked, protective aggression doesn't trigger. Instead, he's just terrified and begging for rescue. He yelps at the sudden noise, and instinctively dives further against Oncie as if he were trying to dig himself into the ground. His body can be felt to begin to shake, and his hands tighten under his restraints as he grips onto himself in an automatic attempt to protect his organs. He lets out a small sound of fear and manages to dig his heel into the ground and shove himself as hard as he can into Oncie's arms, trying to hide in him like a deer hiding between the legs of a stag.*

Once-ler: *Is frowning towards the noise, but he blinks at the Warden's sudden rustling and hiding and feels his heart clutch in his chest as the same rate his hands clutch around him. His gaze snaps towards the door, now not so furious because things are more in his control and he has his soulmate back in his arms, but still protective. He assumes it's nurses returning to drop off the overnight accommodations he was promised, but Edmund doesn't have enough comprehension of what's happening to understand that's all this is. He pulls him into his front, hiding his face in his chest as he holds his hand against the back of his head and pulls their makeshift covers up a little more over him. He feels the shaking and hears the sound, and as his stomach clenches he can't help but whisper down to him that he's okay. Then he orders at the women.* No, just drop them down there and go. I'll do them myself.

Warden: *He's tense - really, really tense - as he grits his teeth and tries to block out the fact that reality is once again intruding on his world just when it was starting to arrange itself in a tiny little bubble he could kind of begin to handle. He was okay, for a second when it was just them. But the noise leaves him exposed to the real world again, to people who threaten everything about him. Even them just looking at him means he's not The Warden, which is the only thing his mind can deal with.*

*He's not sure if he'll end up bending his sunglasses with the force he's putting on them as he buries himself in Oncie's front. His arms shove, just once, in a panicked attempt to grab around his boyfriend's waist or flail at oncoming danger, but it's not strong and the jacket prevents anything from really happening. He can hear his breathing squeak, but he does at least calm a little bit when he hears Oncie talk to him. He stops his minute attempts at struggling, though his heart still flutters and he still freezes against him like a rabbit caught in an open field.*

Older Nurse: *Shrugs and drops the things on the floor. Lissie does the same, dropping down the pillows and a bag containing some overnight supplies. She grumbles on her way out barely heard.* A 'thank you' would be nice… Young men these days-

Nurse Lessie: *Nudges the older nurse and points over to the Warden. Whispers to her.* Nurse Julie, is that allowed?

Warden: *He doesn't really follow what they're saying, but he recognises the tones enough to hear when they drop the things on the floor - which makes him jump anyway - and start to leave. He begins to soften, just a little, but then they start talking again and he kicks at the ground beneath the covers and whispers Oncie's name in the smallest voice, begging him to make them go away.*

Once-ler: *He feels the pressure against him and doesn't care if his sunglasses are bent so long as they don't end up hurting the Warden himself. The kicking and the little whisper of his name only makes that anger surge up harder because now he's responding to his soulmates fear and feels anxious to defend his space. He just made a warm nest for him and they're invading it.*

Nurse Julie: *Huffs and looks over with her hand on her hips, adjusting her own glasses when she notices the new ones on the Warden.* Sir, I can't say that won't count as contraband like his own if he's-

Once-ler: *Is currently hooking his chin over the Warden's head and stroking his back with his hand under the coat and thneed. He rolls his eyes and snaps at her, the demand barked and final.* Just get out.

Warden: *Flinches at the sudden loud voice, his common sense even more inhibited with the sedatives and therefore his learned behaviour responds instinctively with a flinch to the shout of the angry man. But a split second later, he recognises the voice as his Oncie, which makes sense because the shout was very close and Oncie is hugging him right now, and that flinch immediately settles because he knows he’s being protected. Oncie is so powerful and has such a presence, he’d recognise that voice of his anywhere, it’s the voice that shows strength and makes demands around Superjail despite everything. Even in the jaws of Superjail, Oncie is still a force to be reckoned with. For some reason, that foggy thought almost makes his throat close up.*

Nurse Julie: *Rolls her eyes and shrugs as she turns and then leads Lessie out of the room.* There, that's your answer. *They close it all back up and leave them in peace.*

The Once-ler: *Once the women are gone, his attention immediately turns back to the man in his arms, even if a part of him is still watching their surroundings so that Edmund knows someone is.* Hey, hey, it's okay, they're gone. *He curls around him and rubs his lips against his head, speaking in a softer voice.* You're safe now.

Warden: *He's shaking like a leaf when the door shuts, eyes clenched shut, and realising beneath everything that he's in a really, really bad place, and that for him to be in this really bad place, something really has gone wrong. A certain existential understanding falls over him, but he doesn't have the processing power to handle it. He's actually in trouble. This is a situation that might not just go away like a sickness or a nightmare, but this might mean his life has really changed permanently. His eyes fly open and he looks up at Oncie like he's desperate to see something other than the terrible world he's landed himself in, and he whispers the word that signals that he wants everything to stop. His white flag, his safe-word, the sign that he wants to be in his bed now, and for the ride to stop so he can get off.* I'm sorry. *His voice is barely audible, but his expression is a mask of anguish. He pants with the appearance of falling into a pain-induced panic.* I'm so sorry.

Once-ler: *The shaking only makes him grip harder, as if it might keep him stable, especially at the way Edmund tries to hug for him but just can't. All he can do is hold him back with more strength, and at the least it keeps him warm so the chill doesn't make the shaking worse. Then he feels him lift his head and so he looks back down to him, and that expression of complete, traumatised surrender breaks his heart so hard that it makes him gasp out loud. Then those words come, and he loses his own. He doesn't know what to say, he feels his tongue go cold with a kind of horrified nausea. He shakes his head, eyes wide with knotted eyebrows as he gazes into his eyes and tries to just understand what he means.*

*Something in his expression, in his eyes, is telling him and he thinks he might just see the existential anguish in them. He just wants it to stop, he knows he's been bad - because he's in a bad place, and that's how he knows it works - but he doesn't quite know or remember what he's done. But he feels it, and he'll just apologise for anything, to anyone, to hope it might make the pain go away, that it might stop the punishment. When has he ever offered that grace to anyone himself? Maybe he doesn't even know it's an option, which makes this even more devastating if it's just a broken last cry for help that he knows is hopeless. Nevertheless, what he begs for is a thing that, in his childhood and world view, has always been nothing but an inconceivable idea that’s as real as the Easter bunny. That thing is mercy.*

*He sighs out a shuddering pained breath and cups his face gently with his hand.* Ohh... Bunny... *He swallows, feeling a small lump in his throat. He can only think of one thing to say, whether or not it's appropriate to come from him. None of this seems personal, none of it seems specific, it's all just highly emotional and much like Edmund will say anything to make the punishment end, Oncie will say whatever he needs to hear to ease him in this moment.* I forgive you. *He pulls him into his shoulder and curls around him, his knees coming up even more to cradle him.* You're forgiven. I can't make the bad things stop right now but I can promise you that you're not in trouble, not with me. You were never in trouble with me. *He kisses the side of his head a few times* And I'm staying here, and as long as I'm here with you, you're in a place where you're not in danger, you're not in trouble and you're not being punished, even if you're upset and hurting.

Warden: *His wide eyes stare up through the sunglasses and lock onto Oncie's, desperate for them. When his hand cups his face, he tilts into it so that his cheek is slightly smushed by his palm, a sliver of his teeth visible between parted lips, and big, terrified eyes filling with tears. When Oncie says those words, for a moment his world stops. His eyes can't pull any wider, but his breath pauses and something settles deep down in him - the little motor that had been driving him to higher and higher panic, telling him that he was in trouble and to run. When he hears that he's forgiven, it starts to very carefully melt down.*

*He's pulled in, and again he tries to hard to hug back but the best he can do is press against him and nuzzle into his warm embrace. His eyes don't shut but they do tighten as tears fall again, and he watches Oncie from the hug like he doesn't dare turn away and find out that he's a figment of a dream. He hears Oncie tell him that he's not in trouble, that he's never been in trouble with Oncie, and that he's going to stay here. That he's not in danger and he's not going to be hurt even though he doesn't feel good. A little bleat splutters out of him as he absorbs those kisses, needing them so badly.*

*'Forgiveness' has never been a word in the Warden's vocabulary. In day-to-day life, sure, he'll forgive a slight. He'll forgive his friends for mistakes and accidents, or deliberately pretend they don't hate him if they do something that hurts, but that's not mercy. Mercy is different. He's never once granted mercy to a prisoner without an ulterior motive. The only other time he ever showed mercy was when he dared to feed that puppy, and they both know what happened after that. Justice and mercy are two sides of the same coin, but he's never flipped his over. His father never flipped it over either - all he's ever known is black-and-white punishment for crimes. Mercy is ‘cheating’, as his Father would think. But he's so scared, and he'd do anything to make the fear go away. He'll cheat if he has to, not realising that he's not 'cheating', but genuinely crying out for help because his mind and sanity are still fighting for a shred of survival and he’s too small and weak to do it himself. His whisper of those words might as well be a scream from a burning building.*

Once-ler: *He doesn't realise that what the Warden’s psychology really reads is him granting him mercy, although that is the truth to what Oncie is offering him. Because as Edmund begs the universe for mercy in his moment of pain, the universe has granted it to him in the form of The Once-ler. Out of everything around him, this is the kind offering, the acceptance of the white flag, the hearing of the safe word and the offer to help cease the pain. That doesn't mean he can change the rest of his situation, but one corner of this situation is merciful. He does consciously know forgiveness however. He knows guilt and he knows how much freedom forgiveness can bring a person, because he knows that he himself would still be in a terrible place had the Lorax not forgiven him for all he'd done.*

Warden: *After a moment, he gives a pitiful nod. With a wet, little laugh he nuzzles his nose into his neck. He's still scared, but as Oncie insists on those promises, the dread begins to lift. He plants a gentle kiss against him.*

The Once-ler: *That lump in his throat grows as he sees the Warden's reaction, but he stays strong, his stomach flutters at the gentle kiss against him and he bundles him up in a little squirm. They couldn't be closer but he still wants him to feel cuddled.* You're safe, Edmund, it's just you and me, and nothing can hurt you when I'm with you. *His voice is low and soft and he kisses his head again.* I love you. *He pulls back just enough to look at him and cup his face, he smiles softly, wiping a tear from his cheek with his thumb.* And in a moment I'm going to wrap us up in that soft blanket, lie us down in the pillows, and we're going to cuddle up together all night. Now that doesn't sound much like punishment, huh?

Warden: *The fear leaves him in layers, each one peeling away or falling to dust, one-by-one as Oncie handles him so tenderly. The existential dread leaves him first, as Oncie promises him that he's not in trouble and reminds him that even if he's uncomfortable, he's not going to be harmed by anyone so long as he's here. Beneath that is an animal tension, ready to spring and try to run or try to defend himself, or cry for help as his instincts prepare for a wolf attack. He's so vulnerable, and he knows it, that he's been flooding himself with adrenaline that's been battling the sedatives in his bloodstream for what must be hours. As he's cuddled up and as Oncie gives him a warm place to curl, as he kisses him and cups his face and says he'll always protect him, that slowly falls away as well.*

*Soon he's left only with the fear at the very bottom of it all, that will probably not go away until they get out of this place. That fear is manageable - it's just an undercurrent of knowledge that he hasn't got his shield and that life is scary and that he's not in Superjail anymore, and that can be carried so long as he's not left by himself. As long as Oncie is handling everything else, he can handle that.*

*It takes him a second for Oncie's words to sink through the fog, but then he nods with a weary, relieved smile, even a little chuckle in his voice.* Mmhmm~ *The smile pushes a final tear down his cheek and over Oncie's thumb, and he blushes ever-so-slightly pink when he's told that he loves him. Soft blankets and a warm bed sound very good right about now.*

Once-ler: *Lets out a soft, loving hum of laughter that's only just audible. His own chest doesn't feel quite as panicked anymore even though he still wants to get Edmund out of here as fast as possible. He's accepted what he can't change and is focusing in what he can control, and now that he can tell his boyfriend's heart rate is calming down, his own is relaxing too and becomes a calm thud against Edmund's front. A hand slides into his hair and he pulls him gently down under his chin and rests his lips against his head as he softly draws his fingertips through his hair in rhythmic circles. He loves him, more than anything in the world, he loves him, so even if Edmund couldn't be released in some ridiculous universe where the Once-ler doesn't get what he wants, he'd stay here in this room with him for an eternity. He whispers.* We'll stay here a moment and then I'll sort the bed out, okay? *He kisses his head, and just so soothe him a little more, he starts to slowly hum a little jingle he once made up about Thneeds and how everybody needs one.*

Warden: *His eyes close as Oncie's hand slides into his hair, his senses still trying to be alert for danger but failing as a sense of comfort, of utter relief, overwhelms him. He curls up under his partner's chin as he's guided, and a few more tears fall down his face - healing tears after a long day fraught with terror, rather than the cry for help they were before. He makes a soft sound that he understands, when Oncie tells him he'll move in a moment to get things sorted, and the softest, most musical little laugh escapes him when he hears that jingle. If he's playing, they really must be okay.*

*The fear fades as his world becomes encapsulated in the Once-ler's arms, and the emotions rush in slowly but surely, like an avalanche of honey. He adores this man. He needs him more than he has ever needed anything else, because he's saving him - not just protecting him like his glasses or his prison. His lips quiver with just how intensely and just how truly those emotions hit, and after a moment he pushes his face into Oncie's neck to whisper words that would normally be so terrifying but right now feel like the only things that matter.* I-I... *His voice is so quiet, not wanting the universe to hear his confession of guilt and weakness, because these words were always treated like that's what they were. But if Oncie has the power to make even mercy exist, then maybe he’s right, maybe his Father was also wrong about those three words. He said them already, in a fit of desperation that he only half-understands, but he says them now like it's a secret he's privileged to keep.* …*He takes a soft, deep breath and pushes himself harder into his arms.* I-I love you...

Once-ler: *He's happily curled around his boyfriend, loving the way he nestles into his neck and starts to calm down. When he starts to speak, he thinks he's about to try and ask or say something else; it's only when he actually says the words that it surprises him.*

*He wasn't expecting to hear the response, but he realises that Edmund finally feels safe enough to say it, because he's here with him. His chest clutches, time slows down again and he feels a lump in his throat that makes emotional, incredulous tears appear in his eyes again. He sniffs and lets out a quiet breath of laughter, grinning from ear to ear. His heart can be felt racing, hammering in his chest with a rush of joy and excitement despite the terrible circumstances they're in. This could be the most happiest he's felt in a long time, despite them both being in the most awful nightmare, all because he adores this man more than life itself and the man has the courage to tell him the same, finally. He sniffs and leans in, nuzzling his nose just under his cheek to gently tilt his face like a kind, larger animal shifting a smaller one.* I love you too, Bunny.

*He meets his lips and they press together, his own parting slightly and softly to linger against his with a few nuzzling smooches, as his arms squeeze around him with the same strength of push that Edmund presses into him. He doesn't overwhelm him, but he does consume his meekness with affection and adoration, surrounding him with his arms and capturing his lips like a flurry of flowers blooming against his skin. He tilts his head into it and lets out a soft sigh as a tear rolls down his cheek. As he pulls away he gazes into the Warden's eyes, the pair of them both tear-filled over their love for each other and he smiles. He grins and whispers* I love you too.

Warden: *It takes a moment, but when Oncie kisses him his lips respond in kind, his heart beating like a fluttering bird in the cage of his ribs, and his cheeks blooming with more colour. They part just a little bit and brush against him, as slow and earnest as a leaf bending for the sun. He bends with the gentle, primal nudge of his face, and dares to crack open his eyes to gaze up at him. The corners of his mouth weakly pull into a broad smile, all the more quavering but all the happier when they're said to him again.*

*He's so happy to hear those words returned, because even though he's certain of their love, he isn't certain about those words, and there's always a chance that they could magically make everything terrible if he's heard to say them out loud. Oncie's voice, however, is bigger than his is, and it's like he drowns out all the threats and dangers that start to clamour for his mind the moment he says the same thing.*

The Once-ler: *The Once-ler closes his eyes and pulls Edmund under his chin again, he begins pressing repeated kisses into his head and around his face, slowly and softly so he's not overwhelmed, but showering him in love still, and holding him like he's the most valuable thing the Once-ler has ever worked so hard to earn. And then, he rests his cheek on his head, safely tucked under his chin, within the warm comfort of his makeshift covers. They rest in the moment, they can face the world again together tomorrow, right now, all that matters is that they’re back together and nothing will pull the Once-ler’s greatest treasure from his greedy, loving hands.*

Warden: *He closes his eyes as he's tucked under Oncie's chin, his whole body melting against him, relying on him entirely to bear his weight. That is, until Oncie starts to push those gentle kisses into his head and face, his drugged senses reading that movement as he would a flurry of kisses if he were at his best. His feet give a very weak and heavy kick of delight as a breathy, lyrical laugh falls from him, delighted at so much fuss and adoration. The Once-ler came back for him, and that’s the only thing that matters. He's loved, and he loves, and even though everything seems to have gone wrong, and even though the whole world seems to hate him right now, and even though the loud, angry, scary voice in his head would disagree, that love is the only thing that matters.*

[sy-on-boy]

Anya + unraveling the mystery of the Desmond family (and Damian being different)

When Melinda debuted, I wrote a post about how she was potentially a character against the Forgers because Anya hadn't met her (we gain insight into characters via our deus ex machina Anya meeting them and reading their minds). Anya has met her now and the narrative has established that she genuinely cares for Damian (even if she's still a mysterious character).

After a long time, Demetrius is finally here. He's still mysterious, but not antagonistic to his brother and still cares for him. Like I said in a previous post, Demetrius subverts what I said above because Anya cannot read him fully even if she's met him. But regardless, Demetrius is here, we've seen him, all four Desmonds have finally debuted. And in my mind, I can vaguely connect them to the Forger-Briar extended family:

Anya - Damian: The kids aiming for stella stars and seeking parental approval. Attached to their dogs. Occasionally heroic (dodgeball, handkerchief, bus hijacking), but ultimately silly kids dragged into "adult" political matters (Anya with more awareness than Damian).

Loid - Donovan: Standing in for WISE vs war, one of the central conflicts. They are fathers and authority figures. Loid, faking a job as a psychiatrist, seeks to understand people (as a fake job, but he also does this as a spy). Donovan famously declared that people would never truly sympathize with each other. A good, attentive father and a neglectful father.

Yor - Melinda: The mothers, the narrative kind of puts them in the background compared to their husbands, but we know they have plot behind them. Yor's job as an assassin is unknown to her family (sans Anya). Melinda has struggles of her own when it comes to parenting her kids / being married to Donovan.

Demetrius - Yuri: Bit of a stretch, but they're both characterized as genius brothers and on the side compared to the main father-mother-child trios. Yuri works for the SSS, in direct opposition to Loid. Demetrius is a middle schooler?? He’s a child so he’s probably not that involved in the main plot, and if he is, it’s not willingly / he was brought up that way. They're both younger (and less experienced) compared to the adults- Demetrius is still a child and Yuri is 20. Yuri's affection for Yor is overflowing and the Briar siblings are very supportive of each other. In contrast, Demetrius is passive and apathetic, but not uncaring.

Anya has met everyone except for Donovan. Anya thinks both Melinda and Demetrius are weird. And Anya thinks of Donovan as the evil super boss. To her, the Desmonds are "weird". "All of Sy-on boy's relatives are such weirdos" - not sure if it's just the translation, but this line seems to imply Anya thinks Damian is exempt to the weirdness of his family. After all, unlike Demetrius, she can read Damian's thoughts normally. And unlike Melinda (and Yuri, and Fiona), she usually doesn't get bombarded with an overwhelming wave of intense thoughts when she reads Damian's mind.

And that brings us to the next point - Damian's time in Eden and the positive influences he receives (away from his family). Damian and Anya are better friends now. E&E's loyalty and affection for him have been established countless times. Becky congratulates Damian this chapter. Despite Damian thinking people suck up to him to get close to his father, he has a group of friends who do care about him (including Becky who doesn't suck up to him). Outside of what we see from Anya's pov, Damian has teachers and his dorm mother (Jeeves too) who care for him. Damian isn't alone.

Damian is shown to be disconnected from his family for whatever reason. His parents didn't come to his orientation. Damian says he doesn't see his parents often. Melinda cares for Damian but isn't allowed to see him often / afraid to be seen with him (?). Damian has called Demetrius before but this is the first time we see him meet Demetrius in person. And we all know about Damian's goal of impressing his father. Damian seems to believe Demetrius and Donovan when close when they were younger (when Demetrius was slightly older than Damian’s age), but Damian receives no such attention. Despite this, Damian still manages to have a fairly happy school life with his friends and supportive adult figures.

I think Damian's growing friendship with Anya and the recent complete reveal of the Desmond family will push Anya into thinking Damian is not like his weird family. If anything, Damian is more like Anya and her associates. Post bus-hijacking, Damian from Anya's POV is seen as more likeable / sympathetic, even more so now that we know about his mother and brother.

Anya is a child who is exposed to some of the darkness in Melinda / Demetrius' heads (trauma from being close to Donovan?), and she doesn't really understand them. Melinda / Demetrius seem off to outsiders (we saw Yor’s reaction, Becky thinks Demetrius is creepy) but it’s only Anya who’s capable of reading their minds and knowing how weird their thoughts are. But Anya has a much better understanding of Damian, the youngest Desmond, who is a kid like her with understandable motivations (getting stars, impressing his dad) similar to Anya's own motivations.

Interesting to note that Demetrius, while at Eden, seems rather lonely and disconnected even within his peer group. When he walks down the stairs, the panel frames it as him being alone, while Damian has four friends with him. When Damian and Anya get their stars, their classmates are shown to be smiling / impressed. When Demetrius gets his stars, we see two of his peers sweatdropping, almost looking wary, while a blushing girl has her hands to her mouth. The story doesn't show Demetrius' peers celebrating his success. It feels like Demetrius' peers are used to him getting good grades but still in awe of how good he is, but... they're not really close to him. Demetrius is not social and says he doesn't understand people, and maybe he doesn't interact much with his peers.

This chapter also reveals Demetrius is not in regular contact with Donovan anymore, contrary to what Damian believed. So Demetrius seems removed from the Desmond family sphere, but also isn't super integrated into the Eden sphere (in contrast to his 6yo brother and his friends). We can believe Demetrius isn’t close to Donovan because he is annoyed (and triggered?) by the mere mention of his father. Clearly Donovan has done something scarring to both Melinda and Demetrius and their thoughts look weird to Anya. Damian, despite craving for his father's attention and being stressed about it, is still relatively unaffected.

From now on, I think we'll slowly get more information about the Desmonds while Damian remains separated from them in the narrative. Damian is introduced as a vital part of Plan B due to his connection with his father, but even Damian himself admits there's not much of a connection. Plan B is working (sort of) because Damianya are friends, but that doesn't mean it's easier for Anya to meet Donovan. I think the narrative has been pushing Damian away from being a plot device for Plan B to being Anya's genuine friend and a victim of the Desmond parenting. At this point, Damian is not really useful to the main plot and there's not much mystery to this 6yo child.

Damian still thinks of himself as a scion of the Desmonds and he’s desperately trying to get his father’s attention. But his dad doesn’t really care, his mom loves him but doesn’t want him to be near Donovan, his brother is similar and also seemingly doesn’t want anything to do with Donovan. Meanwhile, the story establishes him as a boy with a crush on Anya, a boy with friends who will readily sacrifice themselves for him, a boy who’s willing to protect his classmates. All around Damain, his peers, associates, and the story itself has long been defining Damian as someone outside of being the Desmond family. But Damian naturally holds onto it.

Damian isn’t mysterious to Anya because she can read him. Okay, she still thinks he’s a brat sometimes, but that’s Damain being Damian, not Damian being a Desmond. But everyone else in the family is mysterious and it makes Anya feel at least vaguely uncomfortable.

The Desmonds are probably connected to Project Apple, and with the recent hints of Anya’s backstory, we might get some of that. But Damian is framed as almost completely separate to whatever went on, while Melinda and Demetrius are portrayed as victims of Donovan, mysterious and a bit weird but still sympathetic.

And that’s why I think it’s coming together— hints of Anya’s backstory, Damianya becoming better friends, the Desmonds all here. We’ve scratched the surface off and we’re hopefully going to see more.

(Also, just a thought: if Damian indeed goes through a “dark arc” and becomes more like the rest of his family, Anya will know because she can read his mind. She will be able to tell if Damian’s thoughts also start being “weird”. But they are better friends now which could be a lead up to her helping Damian deal with the pressure and struggle.)

[murkycran]

Radiostatic/Voxal Fic Rec List

Welcome to my Radiostatic/Voxal Fic Rec List! ^_^ This will include romantic, platonic, and/or queerplatonic Radiostatic fics (and admittedly probably a couple of Radiosilence fics, too).

I will keep updating this periodically as I read more fics, so feel free to check back every once and a while! I'll reblog it when I update it, plus make a note with the date at the top. Trust me, this is by no means a complete list; there's fics I still want to add to this that I just haven't gotten to yet. I just decided to go ahead and post it anyways, because if I kept waiting until I ran out of fics to rec I'd probably be working on this forever.

These are not in any particular order; I'm going by both my Bookmarks list on AO3 and my memory of fics I forgot to bookmark. I also tried to make notes on what fics were written before season 1 released, but I might have missed some, so keep that in mind.

Please let me know if any links don't work or are wrong!

✨Before you proceed:✨ read the tags on these fics if you decide to read them. Many of them have heavy material - no surprise given the fandom, but still, felt like this needed said. On that note, there's also fics with explicit material and some fics are straight up PWP. Again, read at your own risk/heed the tags.

Fic Rec List Masterpost

Staticmoth Fic Rec List

Misc. Vox Fic Rec List

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Radio Healed the Video Star by Aspiring_Forest_Witch

Summary: Alastor comes across an unconscious and battered Vox while out on one of his strolls. He feels compelled to bring him back to the hotel.

Notes: 98% of this fic was written before season 1 was released, so keep that in mind, because there's obviously going to be inconsistencies with canon. It's nearly finished (at least according to the author's notes in the latest chapters, I think). I suggest pacing yourself with this one - it's nearly 700k words long. I ruined a good sleep schedule staying up to get through it. (So worth it though.) There are quite a few OCs in later chapters, but they're such good OCs. You fall in love with them just as much as the canon characters, I swear. I would die for Verity and the Trio.

Let's Misbehave by joosymango

Summary: Alastor wins a bet against Vox, now his rival must stop pestering him for two weeks. It should be a pleasant break! So why does he miss the idiot?

Notes: Vaguely inspired by Aspiring_Forest_Witch's Radio Healed the Video Star. Also largely written before season 1 release. First fic I read for the HH fandom. ^_^

Safe with Me Series by rillo (rillyrillo)

Summary: Having only ever set his sights on men who treat women with odious disrespect, Alastor never thought he'd take interest in Vox's turbulent relationship with his fiancé and business partner, Valentino. He decides to lend a helping hand in the hopes of getting Vox out of his sticky situation. After all, what are childhood enemies for?

Unfortunately, neither Alastor nor Vox could've predicted the rollercoaster of unsaid emotions and future horrors that are thrown their way. Will they be able to rely on each other and get by unscathed? Or will destiny have other plans for these two?

[HUMAN AU] [There's art included for the human designs]

Notes: It's so, so good. ;-; Heed the tags. There's a prequel consisting of oneshots, plus a sequel (listed below, bc I can't not put it here)! And there's ART! So much art!

You, My Everything by rillo (rillyrillo)

Summary: Some say that love can conquer all, even in Hell.

Vox begged to differ, and he was damn well sure Alastor did too – or at least he would be, if Alastor hadn’t become one big question mark.

Sequel to Safe with Me.

Notes: Only read if you've read Safe With Me!!! Still pretty early in the story but so good. ;-; The angst, I swear...

You're on the Air by rillo (rillyrillo)

Summary: A series of short, daily conversations between a radio host and his avid listener, as the two learn more about each other’s lives over the air. Set in the late 90s/early 2000s.

Notes: Same author as Safe with Me, but not set in the same universe! This one is set up in a literal radio show format; almost entirely dialogue-centric.

Of Candied Pine and Cherried Smoke by rillo (rillyrillo)

Summary: Inspired by x_Arcticfox_x’s fanfiction: Blue Raspberries And Cherry Cola

After overdosing on them one too many times to curb the steadily weakening suppressants, Vox's body rejects them outright. Now with his scent getting stronger, he finds himself struggling to hide his true status as an Omega. In his desperation, he seeks help from the one person that knows his secret: Alastor.

Notes: Omegaverse. Same author as Safe with Me series and You're on the Air!

Blue Raspberries And Cherry Cola by x_Arcticfox_x

Summary: Vox is an omega, that's his biggest secret.

During his life time he hid this fact using suppressants, and counited to in death. One day he runs out of pills and his supplier is out of stock for the time being so Vox is forced to submit to the torture of going through heat for the first time in decades.

Too bad his business partner only see's omega's as mere object's...

But hey, at least Angel found him just in time, right?

Notes: Omegaverse. Currently on hold, but has 14 chapters currently available for reading. :)

Once Bitten, Twice Shy by The_Penny_Tails

Summary: Alastor decides that it's time to claim what is rightfully his, consequences be damned.

Notes: It's not porn but it might as well have been for how fucking intense this scene was. 😳

Dripping Pink by The_Penny_Tails

Summary: Just before an Overlord meeting, Alastor gets infected by an off-market, highly potent, and incredibly dangerous love potion. Nobody realises until it's too late.

Notes: Simultaneously funny as fuck and erotic as all hell. I suffered from so much secondhand embarrassment on Vox's behalf. It's wonderful. :D

Lucidity's Fog by The_Penny_Tails

Summary: Ever since he met Alastor, Vox has been having raunchy dreams about the deer. Those dreams suddenly stop when Alastor disappears. For seven years, he's free of the guilt, of the shame brought on by his unconscious desire.

Until Alastor comes back, and Vox is plagued by a new dream the same day he finds out about the news. This time, however, something is distinctively different about how the deer is acting.

Notes: Author tagged for light angst, but ngl the ending did not feel like 'light' angst to me lol. Hurt in a good way.

Finger Tips and Dotted Lips by The_Penny_Tails

Summary: Alastor has sensitive hands; he finds this out at the most inconvenient time possible. Unfortunately, Vox is the one who ends up paying the price for it.

Having to help a seemingly broken Overlord whilst navigating this new discovery proves to be a little more taxing than the Radio Demon could ever have imagined.

Notes: Alastor is such a troll in this omg.

Thawing Out by Seaside_Dreaming

Summary: Seeing a small crack in Vox's screen nags at Alastor more than he likes to admit.

Vox wishes things were better. Sooner or later, Alastor has to come to terms with the fact he has feelings, in general.

Notes: Written before season 1 release. HIGHLY suggest reading the prequel one-shot. It's not necessary to understand the plot here, but you should read it anyway.

Static by passthevoxcord

Summary: Vox creates a new and improved version of himself to please Val, only to be replaced by it. He is left beaten and broken with no one to turn to . . . except maybe his oldest enemy, Alastor.

Notes: Written before season 1 release.

Hating you feels so good by TwoBitJester

Summary: Vox obsesses over his returned enemy and finds himself a little too wound up

Notes: Very good PWP.

Laced Over Dinner by hazbinhearts

Summary: Vox is persuaded to dress a little differently over dinner for Alastor, but finds it remarkably uncomfortable as the night goes on. Written for VoxWeek21 Day 3: dressing up [appearance, formal, dance].

Notes: Written before season 1 release. Corsets. 😳

Observer by DeviousPossum

Summary: He moved the cursor to click off, when he suddenly heard a very recognizable static laced tone.

Alastor.

Alastor.

What the fuck. Alastor is singing.

Vox unintentionally ran claw marks across his desk, an increasingly common habit for him as of late. He grimaced at his now ruined table and unsuccessfully tried to reel in an inexplicable feeling that could only be described as jealousy.

Notes: Porn with a tiny bit of plot in the first chapter. :3

RadioTV Week 2021 Series by Heliosolar

Summary: Pretty much the title; various prompts.

Notes: Written before season 1 release. All worth reading, though they aren't connected.

Sharkblocking by Anonymous

Summary: Alastor is Vox’s number one rival. Incidentally, though nobody involved is aware of it, Alastor’s number one rival is actually Vox’s pet shark.

In which Alastor is actually a little obsessed back and Vark is the biggest obstacle to Radiostatic short of canon itself.

Notes: VARK!

Control + V by TooManyPsuedonyms

Summary: Vox and Alastor have a... thing. Not quite a relationship, but something. Vox is too scared to define it properly, and Alastor is dead set that Vox will eventually get bored of his lack of reciprocity and move on.

So, Valentino tries to show Vox what he is missing.

... too bad Vox didn't want him like that. ... too bad Alastor didn't know want is a vague word.

Notes: Heed the tags!!! There's currently a sequel; I haven't read it yet, but I definitely plan to. 👀

gift of the magi by vol_ctrl

Summary: "... Although husband and wife are now left with gifts that neither one can use, they realize how far they are willing to go to show their love for each other, and how priceless their love really is ..."

Alastor/Vox established relationship fluff.

Notes: Written before season 1 release. Very sweet. ^_^

the lost tape by vol_ctrl

Summary: There's a NEW ambitious media demon in Pentagram City. You never get a second chance to make a first impression, right?

Notes: Written before season 1 release.

12 Days of Yuletide by vol_ctrl

Summary: A parody of the 12 Days of Christmas traditional tune, as can only be done by Vox gifting to his beloved adversary.

Or, a series of letters from the desk of Alastor upon receiving a series of increasingly elaborate gifts from his insufferably modern foil during the holiday season.

Notes: Written before season 1 release.

Fear makes the heart grow fonder by Graysongirl

Summary: After a bit of inspiration from an unlikely source Vox comes up with the plan that scaring Alastor is the best route to gaining his affections. The haunted house at LuLu World seems like the perfect (safe) environment for a bit of pre-planned scaring...

[Stand-alone staticradio]

Notes: Written before season 1 release. Funny af. "Red! Red!" XD

Cordyceps, King of Ants by spappest

Summary: Vox is tired. Of Valentino. Of Velvette. Of Alastor, and Hell, and everything in between. He can't escape, but he can cut himself off, piece by piece, until he feels nothing at all. Alastor takes exception to this approach and commissions a certain princess of Hell to fix his foe. Now Vox has a hotel of misfits on one side of him, overlords on the other, and Alastor crushing his cage ever smaller.

Clearly, the only way Vox will get any peace and quiet is to just kill God.

Valentino did always tell him that he had no chill.

Notes: Started before season 1 was released. Technically features Staticmoth but it's not the focus as much as Radiostatic (which honestly has a relationship status of ??? not romantic but also not friendship or even strictly enemies...just...Alastor and Vox). O_O I think about this fic on a daily basis.

Russian Roulette by spappest

Summary: Vox and Alastor play a game that Vox is way too excited to lose.

Notes: Started before season 1 release. Take note!!! I'm putting this on the Radiostatic list because it's almost entirely centered on Alastor and Vox's dynamic, but the romantic relationship is Staticmoth. The Staticmoth is just not featured very much.

Vox and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Afterlife by spappest

Summary: Alastor goes into rut.

Vox has a bad time. Then a good time. Then a very bad time. Then a brief vacation. Then a confusing time.

Notes: Background Staticmoth, but Radiostatic is most prominent. Funny af. Alastor and Vox have...a very special relationship. Lol.

Killer Ex by FanGirl48

Summary: Alastor was a serial killer who valued his privacy. So when someone who claims to know what he is tries to barge into his life he can't let them live, his secret must be protected at all cost.

A normally easy task easy task becomes complicated when Alastor's ex-boyfriend is dragged into the whole thing forcing the serial killer to go visit them for the first time in seven years.

Notes: Human AU. Love me some possessive Alastor. <3

Negotiations by FanGirl48

Summary: Vox had no interest in attending a meeting between Heaven and Hell following the failed attack by the Adam and his Exterminators. Alastor's little gremlin caused the mess, so he can go clean it up. Vox had nothing wanted nothing to do with the radio demon, king of hell or heaven.

But that was before Lucifer made the media overlord aware of Valentino's little job offer to his daughter.

Damnit Valentino!

Notes: "And they were roommates!" "Oh my god they were roommates"

Down, Up, and Back Down by CowboyEnthusiast

Summary: Vox dies. Surprisingly no one takes this well.

Or, Vox dies and Alastor tries to drag his soul back from Purgatory.

Notes: Another fic I think about daily... Heavy themes. Heed the tags.

Hold Me Like a Grudge by Rachello344

Summary: Alastor has spent a long time running from Vox. Vox has chased after him almost as long. When suppressants fail throughout the city, they finally collide.

Notes: Omegaverse. Fun fact about this author: all their Radiostatic fic titles are from Fall Out Boy lyrics lol. (I fucking love FOB sue me.) I haven't yet read all of Rachello344's Radiostatic fics, BUT I have them all on my To Read list because I've loved everything I've read of theirs so far lol.

What Makes You So Special? by Rachello344

Summary: With Lucifer’s return to the Pride Ring, the other Deadly Sins were bound to take notice. When Asmodeus stops by the Pride Ring to visit the Morningstars, the Vees are able to make a deal to host a pop-up shop of the incredibly popular Lust Ring establishment, Ozzie’s, bringing it to the Pride Ring for the first time.

When Vox and Alastor both attend the restaurant’s opening night, long repressed sparks fly, forever changing their relationship.

Notes: Because of the pacing of this (sex first romance later), I feel like this is the Radiostatic equivalent of Femalefonzie's Freak-A-Zoid (a really good Staticmoth fic). This is hands down one of the most romantic Radiostatic fics I've read. ^_^

Hold Me Tight (or Don't) by Rachello344

Summary: Alastor and Vox finally come to an understanding, both of each other and of what they each mean to the other. Their relationship evolves accordingly, one concession at a time, until they both get everything they could possibly want: power, companionship, and even love.

Notes: So, so good.

Keep You Like an Oath by Rachello344

Summary: Alastor normally wouldn’t bother with the chore—breaking into V Tower was quite a lot of work, even for him—but he found himself curious about what Vox and his little friends might be working on. Especially since whatever it was had Angel concerned enough to report back to the rest of the hotel about it.

Of course, before he can learn anything, he’ll need to sneak past Vox’s watchful eye…

Notes: God it's just...so good. Read it. Radiostatic reconciliation. One thing I love about Rachello344 writing Radiostatic is Alastor's terms of endearment for Vox. ^_^

To Be Yours by pinegreenapples

Summary: Alastor hears something he hasn't heard in years. He decides to investigate why now, of all times, this frequency has turned back on. Vox is not amused.

Notes: Hurt no comfort. Hurts so good, though. ;-;

oleanders in june by spoondrifts

Summary: It seems like while Alastor was off preying on the self-destructive addictions of desperate sinners, Vox was off getting himself beaten half to death, probably from spouting belligerent nonsense at someone with violent tendencies and a far lower threshold for disrespect than Alastor. Not everyone finds poor Vox’s chatter as charming as he does.

If Vox is unconscious, then Vox is not being entertaining, and Alastor came here to have fun, not play nursemaid.

Or: Drunk on power and itching to cause some mayhem, Alastor hunts down the only person in the city who's always up for anything. Unfortunately, he finds Vox... not exactly in tip-top shape. No matter; he can work with that too.

Notes: ^_^ Very sweet.

equilibrium by curtailed

Summary: Post-Finale. The Hotel finds Alastor right on the front lawn, unconscious and bleeding, still injured from Adam's blade. While he recovers, all of Hell scrambles to find out who his mysterious rescuer is.

Meanwhile, Vox tries not to freak out that he might have accidentally made a soul bond to save that deer asshole's life. All he had wanted to do was to scope out the ruins of Alastor's radio tower. Fuck him for being curious, he supposed.

Notes: This fic has me in a CHOKEHOLD. I love the characterizations so, so much. Manages to fit in humor alongside the angst. One of the best fight scenes I've ever seen put into words. Curtailed really took Vox and Alastor as characters and planned out a cool fucking fight scene using their unique abilities. I automatically love anything tagged with "one fell first but the other fell harder" lol.

candlelight by curtailed

Summary: Despite the #SirRepentious success, Heaven remains skeptical of a sinner's ability to change. Logic gets lost somewhere, and really, what's a better way to show sinners can be marginally less horrible than to stick two Overlords who hate each other in the same living space?

OR

Alastor and Vox play house.

Notes: The comedy of Alastor and Vox being forced to be civil with each other and then unintentionally becoming very domestic together. Lol

wallow by curtailed

Summary: A 2+1 fic. Two times when Alastor and Vox were in a love triangle (hard quote on love, hard quote on triangle), and the one time Alastor had Vox to himself.

Notes: Only 1 (very good) chapter so far, but safe to say pretty heavy already. Heed the tags.

Addicted by Dancingdog

Summary: After the latest argument with Valentino, Vox finds himself at the Hazbin Hotel. An injured Alastor is less-than-pleased to see him, which is understandable considering they are enemies.

But as more and more of Valentino's venom leaves his system, Vox begins to remember his days before V-Tower and he learns exactly why Alastor rejected his offer all those decades ago.

His memories return in fits and spurts - not all of them good. His past with Alastor isn't something he expected and it turns out that he isn't the only one suffering.

Notes: Dude. This fic hurt me. Such good angst.

Radio Made the Video Star Series by songofhell

Summary: Snippets of Vox and Alastor's afterlife, and their journey from strangers to friends to enemies to... something more.

Notes: Pretty much what the series summary says - a series of installments that chronicle the beginning and subsequent evolution of Alastor and Vox's relationship. Very good, has tons of possessive!Alastor, which I die for.

Uneasy by Saezs

Summary: “Something’s wrong with Voxy.”

Velvette’s eyes snapped to the tall moth pimp. “And?” she prompted with a raised eyebrow. As if she needed to deal with two piss babies this close to a show. Valentino shrugged, tapping away on his phone, and walked away to stand threateningly close to her new models. Before she could snap at him, she saw it; his wings were twitching. Barely noticeable to strangers, just under the hum of the building’s lights, he was squeaking with each tap of his fingers. She felt unease and a healthy dose of aggravation swirl in her stomach.

Or: Vox was roofied and sexually assaulted. Velvette tries to be better than her mother. Unexpected connections are formed.

Notes: Heed the tags! Features genderfluid Vox. :)

Five Times Vox and Alastor Danced and One Time They Didn't by Drowsy_Salamander

Summary: “I say, good fellow, what are you doing on the ground like that?”

The voice was perky, cheerful, and bright. It had a crisp mid-Atlantic accent, the kind Vox remembered being all the rage for stage and film performers back when he first entered the broadcast industry. The diction was crystal clear with every sound enunciated separately to maximise clarity, the consonants clicked and the vowels were broad. It was a performer’s voice.

A voice for radio.

Oh shit.

... Five times Vox and Alastor danced and one time Vox and Alastor didn't.

From their first meeting through their friendship, to their enmity and fighting. From infatuation to yearning to animosity. Dancing is a partnership, is it not?

Notes: Each chapter so far has been a different type of dance, which is really neat. Especially chapter 2. ^_^ That said, there's a feeling of impending doom, knowing what happens to their relationship eventually... Not saying that as a deterrent but just a comment on how I felt while reading it lol. It's very sweet, which is why it hurts to think of future chapters. 🙃

Days Long Past by Momo52

Summary: All sinners of hell bore some physical marks of how they lived and died. Some physical manifestations were more obvious while others were subtle. Vox was not an exception to this rule.

While his television head was an obvious indication of his life while on Earth, the mark he bore from his death was far more subdued. Luckily enough, his shame was easily concealed behind a high collar. Unfortunately, he is just as well known in his afterlife as he was in his life. As such, trying to make everyone believe that he is so much stronger than what his death implies is a constant battle. He only wished that he wasn’t the hardest one to convince.

Notes: I think platonic Radiostatic is the endgame here. Still pretty early in the story, but I'm really liking this author's depiction of Vox and Alastor's pasts. Heed the tags. There are heavy subjects such as suicide (very big theme for Vox's pov) and period-typical racism (in Alastor's past) present in the story.

Remote Access by x-UsoTsuki-x (its_not_reael)

Summary: In the aftermath of Alastor and Vox's electrifying on-air showdown, Vox finds himself unusually rattled. His usual suave demeanor is slipping, much to his cohorts' amusement – and concern. Velvet can do little more than roll her eyes at his antics. Valentino, on the other hand, is convinced that all Vox needs to do is get fucked and relax.

or, alternatively...

The tech-savvy overlord manages to snag a virus from a porn site and finds himself in the arms of his worst enemy.

Notes: Fairly certain this is firmly Radiosilence based on the tags (and the direction of the story so far). Very funny, very hot. Vox is pathetic in this one. Lol

Nun-thing Like You've Ever Seen Series by A_Cypress_Coffin

Summary: Alastor, the feared radio demon with more blood on his hands than most of hell combined, wasn't always as we imagine him. There was a time where instead of a dapper suit and smile he donned a simple vow and habit. That didn't last of course, but the journey is quite something.

Notes: This author has a great sense of humor, lmao. I enjoyed the unique headcanons for Alastor's backstory. The tag that hooked me: "Accidentally becoming a better person through bad domming and found family".

Empathia by The_Oblivious_Swallow

Summary: Creating new technology is boring, sex is physically unappealing, the other Vee’s are so annoying, annoying, annoying! Even Vark, his baby, his pride and joy, doesn’t stir the same joy in his heart like he should.

So, Vox had concluded that it had to go. For his sake.

Notes: Contains Staticmoth, but Radiostatic seems like the endgame (I write this as there is one chapter still left). Really interesting idea. I love Vox.exe so much. ;-;

Every Madman Has His Vice by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: “What the fuck do you want, Alastor? Was it not enough to kill me all those years ago? Now, you had to go for the people I loved and the only things I had left in this fucking Hellhole?”

“It was my fault,” Alastor whispers as he approaches Vox slowly, as if he was some sort of wounded animal he didn’t want to scare off. His prey. “Vox, I’m sorry. If I had a chance to redo that night, I would never have hurt you to this extent. I’ll never harm you again.”

“That’s seven years too fucking late, Alastor.”

OR: Seven years ago, instead of Alastor disappearing, it was Vox who left instead.

Notes: I’m so fucking here for this AU. Possessive Alastor, Vox helping with the hotel, Husk is still an Overlord, yessss

Metathesiophobia (Fear of Change) by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: There's a lot that can change in seven years.

But never once had Alastor expected for something like this from his old rival and older friend.

Or, Alastor and Vox start to rekindle their old friendship again after a shocking discovery strikes the deer demon.

Notes: QPR Radiostatic with MtF Vox! Contains a smidge of Staticmoth, but it's in the background and not the focus. Very well written.

surimi and venison by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: A series of short drabbles (500+ words) in an interconnected universe (peep the tags, they're still in hell), centering around Alastor and his new pet fish... shark... television thing. Will (hopefully) update 1-2 times a week. Written as my attempt at a Mermay series.

Notes: Like the summary says, Mermay prompts featuring SharkHybrid!Vox, along with Alastor, who literally saw Vox and decided to make him his pet. Lol.

an arm and a leg, my dear, les yeux d'la tête by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: “I mean, usually when Val gets mad he gets like, super pissy too an’ starts destroyin’ shit ‘round the set and in his clubs, but like, usually Vox can calm him down. Problem is, where the Hell is that guy? I haven’t seen ‘im round the Tower for like, a month or two now. That ain’t normal.”

“What, so you mean he just up and left?”

“No, but like… he hasn’t been seen ‘in public’ for like, two months now. It’s startin’ to get suspicious. Like, I ‘unno if I’m just paranoid or something, but… Vox is like, the fuckin’ face of Hell’s Entertainment District. When he’s not round for a bit, that’s nothing to worry about on its own… but when he’s not round for a bit an’ Val and Velvette are creeping around, looking for his rival…? I mean… the dots are connecting. If Al did something…”

“If Vox was dead, we would know.” OR: Two months ago, Vox went missing. Right now, it seems as if Alastor has something to hide.

Notes: Vox gets attic-wifed and wears a virgin killer sweater. ^_^

we'll go down together in the ashes of our love by phantasm_png (chibellero)

Summary: Glimpses into the Radio Demon's life as he reluctantly navigates parenthood with his co-parenting partner and the demon princess hoisted onto him by the King and Queen of Hell.

Loosely inspired by Spy X Family.

Notes: CUTE! I love domestic Radiostatic.

What Has Been by Tianren

Summary: Vox has never known peace. From being the son of a egocentric cult leader, to being the boyfriend of a self absorbed abuser. Vox has managed to build a pretty sad life for himself. The only spot of sunshine that had ever blessed his existence was when he met an amateur true crime investigative journalist, with a podcast named, Alastor. The man was his only source of unfiltered news and contact to the world outside his father’s compound. But after Vox finally escaped the cult he waited for Alastor. Waited weeks in their assigned meeting spot just to be forgotten. Vox was convinced he’d stopped waiting for Alastor years ago until he meets the man again seven years later at a hotel. What will reconnecting with his past lead to and will it help him escape the hell he’s built for himself?

Takes place in the late 2000s early 2010s

Trigger warning for religious trauma and abuse as major themes of this story. Will add more warnings if they arise as I go on.

Notes: Really interesting human AU concept!

(Fic rec list to be continued)

[slowlysoluminary]

Still working on that chapter. Don't worry, it's coming along! Yesterday i was trapped at a party for 10 hours and, being the introvert i am, decided to take a break from drawing for an animatic by trying to draw for this au instead. don't know why i didn't just do artfight lol

FULL KING REFERENCE PACK + SIFFRIN DUO POSTGAME REFERENCES

Notes and details under the cut

sooooo howsabout postgame content?

the original post talking about postgame can be found here but it doesn't go into too much detail

So post-game resetfrin and gloop. they go with the party, kinda like a lot of twohats aus? resetfrin goes with the party because they know mirabelle and kinda know isabeau from when he would get apprenticed by the king (long story), but also because resetfrin acted so much like the old siffrin they used to know that it felt odd to leave him behind.

gloop, however, WAS the old siffrin! the party knows this, they found it out in the last loop, and they've formed such a bond with them that it's as natural as it is in the original game. the only issue is: gloop has changed SO much. physically, mentally, even a pronoun change - the party wants to help her out, but they want to explore who this New Siffrin is, too. Isn't it ironic that the new addition is the one you know far more of than the old addition?

resetfrin stays siffrin because... uh. because he's always been siffrin? there's no conflict there. gloop, after getting their memory back, ALSO goes back to siffrin, because that's who they really are and they acknowledge that loop is their own person. they don't want to be reminded of their time as gloop, either.

so... they're both Siffrin. And they're both technically the same person. do you see the issue?? the two of them didn't. the party did.

there's a comic I'm thinking about making to explore the processes and conversation that happened to initiate the name changes. the long and short of it is they can't BOTH be siffrin, but neither of them want to be siffrin if the other one can't also be siffrin, so they go on separate journeys to find a new name. they come back together with the party afterwords and they both ended up picking the same name so it's back to square one.

they talk to the party the second time and after a lot of brainstorming land on Orion for resetfrin and Lux for gloop. it helps the party distinguish between them and helps me establish the difference between postgame content and in-game content

(plug moment but these names were suggested by @the-bitter-ocean who gave me like. a whole list of things i could choose from. oh the life saver. i didn't even think about what names they would've picked until xe helped. and ohhh theyre so good. he also has some amazing aus including a miraloops au that you should go check out. pretty please)

the hair thing is SUPER IMPORTANT i originally only did it because they needed a way to separate themselves from eachother, but i realized they would also have done it to separate themselves from the old people they used to be. very poetic. 10/10 thank you brain for the excuse

the colors for orion's alt outfits are just a limited color pallete, they're not actually the colors afaik. (<- says the creator) but Lux's colors are 100% the colors, yes. their star body is different from loop's, where loop's body is solid black and lux's seems to glow on it's own. do you see where the name lux came from.

it's really dysphoric. imagine being turned into a ghost against your will and losing your memories, and them after gaining your memories back you turn into a completely different body AGAIN and it's STILL not the original body you had. i would cry.

gloop/lux's eye is still blind. even as a ghost they lacked depth perception. L. since resetfrin wasn't with the party to lose his eye they don't have any vision impairment

actually, about that. funny little thing. if siffrin wasn't there to protect bonnie, who did? haha hehe. hey why does odile have her arm in a cast...

KING TIME

okay i got a lot of questions about it so i double-checked on the original post and. yeah it DOES say the king's name. both in the text and on the image. but you'd be forgiven for missing it because it's pretty small on the image and there's a lot of text to read through

anyway pre-madness king's name is Lazare!! he originally looks like the lithe dude on the left. he's scholar-ish, came to vaugarde on vacation before losing his memory, yadda yadda... a lot of his information is on the original post so I won't repeat anything that's already been said

he picked Lazare a few days after losing his memory. he never told his name to anyone in the town he was staying so all he got was "travelling one" and he really genuinely thought that was his name for a hot second until he realized that Vaugarde really likes adding -one to titles

i made his hair curlier! after drawing the king for the chapter cg i realized i did NOT makw his hair curly enough when drawing Lazare. his hair type is almost exactly mine, though mine has more define curls, so drawing it is a BLAST!!

Defender arc Lazare! He bulked himself up to come off more physically and mentally strong. is this a trans allegory? is the King trans or was the body craft just to match his perception of himself? not sure. At this point in time he's already travelled with siffrin for a bit so i like to think he's a teensy bit protective. somewhere between friend snd father figure. cool guy

you know who's not cool? this guy vvv

this is where the King becomes the King :3 his hair is OBNOXIOUSLY long, almost rapunzel-like but nowhere near as bad. it always covers one eye but it doesn't really matter which one.

the crown happens like... VERY shortly before he makes the wish and starts freezing people in time. hes lonely and isolated and its something like coping with his delusions about everyone being out to get him

that's not the way he thought in the original loop, but after the reset his descent is much faster and harder than the last. when Siffrin starts climbing the tower, yearning becomes animosity as he thinks Siffrin finally betrayed him like he "always knew they would." or something.

hey 16yo sif jumpscare!!! wasn't he on the original post too?

.

anyway!!! that's it! that's all! i swear it's all. inevitably I'll have to make gloop and resetfrin full references but I'm happy with the ones i drew in the original post which I'll probably end up pointing people to if they want to draw either of them. the king was the one i worried about most because he's so different from canon, and same goes for the postgame designs. even coming up with new names was worrying because they're practically not even the same person from canon anymore

but that's the fun thing with aus, isn't it? lol

cya

[kriscommitscrimes]

IN-DEPTH CHARACTER ANALYSIS OF KRIS(MAS) DREEMURR

Hello! I've wanted to make this post for a WHILE now, since Kris is my favourite character ever, and I LOVE analyzing characters!!

Anyway before I start just remember that people consume media differently, and this is just what I've personally picked up on. You may interpret certain points I make differently to me, and that's ok! I'm just sharing MY analysis of Kris, at the end of the day, they're a character who has never spoken any dialogue that's visible to us, so their intentions behind certain things could be interpreted differently depending on who's consuming the media.

Kris will be EXCLUSIVELY referred to by they/them (they/them/themself specifically) pronouns throughout this post. If you refer to them as anything other than they/them while interacting with this post I'm gonna block you on the spot sorry.

ANALYSIS BELOW THE CUT BECAUSE IT'S LONG!!! TW there's probably some swearing I can't remember

By the way, I'm not including any screenshots because I. forgot to take them last time I played through Deltarune, but the next time that I do, I'm going to make like a revamped version of this post with screenshots. Sorry about that!!

Kris is their own, separate character from the player. This is a no-brainer if you've actually played through Deltarune and paid the slightest bit of attention to it. Kris is their own, separate character with a VERY distinct, interesting personality, who had a life before the events of Deltarune, and even still has control over some things that they say and do while in our control.

Kris isn't actually a quiet person. Kris, in reality, is an overdramatic, sassy, talkative person who often draws attention to themself by scaring people (especially Noelle), and causing scenes. They CONSTANTLY play mean spirited pranks on Noelle or pressure her into things (I'm NOT talking about Snowgrave, I'll get to thar later), like shaking the ferris wheel carriage despite Noelle being scared of heights, and telling her that ICE-E is real and eats kids. They still do this during the events for Deltarune, like if you go against Noelle's wishes and pet the cheese, Kris strokes it like a cat, and if you give Noelle a healing item called a Choco Diamond, she says something along the lines of 'Umm, it's ok, Kris, I'll share', and both of them get healed. We don't choose for Kris to force Noelle to share, that's a decision they make. As for drawing attention to themself, the first thing that comes to mind is they falling to the ground and sulking when they're too short and weak to play Queen's arcade machine, or them barking at Noelle when she offers them a dog treat. They're loud and impulsive, shown when they eat the pie at the end of chapter one, repeatedly kicking the robot in the basement when nothing happens originally before the Sneo fight, eating all of the chocolate Undyne gives them to give to Alphys if you interact with the box, and screaming that they're normal if you call Toriel after watching her conversation with Alphys at the start of chapter two. Speaking of which...

Kris seems to have identity issues. This is one of the things here that everyone in the fandom is kind of already aware of, but this is a full character analysis, so it's still important to mention. Kris is the only human in Hometown, but desperately wants to be perceived as normal. They scream it at Toriel like I mentioned earlier, they wore a headband with red horns on it when they were little to look more like a boss monster, and they seem actively disgusting or even frightened by other humans. They also seem to be living in their brother's shadow a bit, which may be why they like drawing attention to themself. Everything I've said about their personality seems to be a little on the negative side so far, but everyone in Hometown knows their name, and seems to quite like them, so why is this? Well...

Kris is charming, well-spoken, and funny. They're a prankster known for pulling mean-spirited pranks on people, but even still characters like Noelle look back at those things fondly, and everyone in Hometown seems to like spending time with Kris. Kris' flirting abilities are pretty obvious, and are used to win over loads of Darkners, not to mention their ability to formulate a compelling speech on the spot, as shown during the first Queen battle when toasting to her. They easily win people over, especially if they like a person, I mean, they became best friends with their former bully in a DAY! A DAY!!! People seem to find them just genuinely fun to hang around, probably due to them just being a funny, charming, somewhat balls of the walls kinda person.

Kris is NOT evil or malicious. This is one of the most important points I've wanted to make on this post. I've seen the theory that Kris is evil because they don't actively do anything to prevent Snowgrave from happening tossed around and I'm here to say that that is actually fucking stupid sorry. Normally I HATE being mean about people's theories because, like I said, everyone consumes media differently, but that one is just genuinely terrible. I'd say it's WAY more likely that as Noelle gets strong, out control over Kris becomes stronger. Normally, when we choose an option to make Kris say or do something, they ELABORATE on that, which is confirmed by how characters interact with them. We just can't see them speaking to give the illusion that they're a blank slate, under our full control. But, during Snowgrave, they just say EXACTLY what you tell them to say. If you tell them to say 'We're something else', they just say 'We're something else'. If you tell them to say 'Proceed', they just say 'Proceed'. Sure, you could put this towards them not caring, but after Berdly is frozen and you reunite with Ralsei and Susie, both of them say that Kris looks HURT. And later on, they REFUSE to go and see Noelle in her room. The refuse to THINK about it. They're not happy with what happened. They didn't want to go around freezing people. But the one thing that Really stood out to me, was during the Snowgrave Spamton Neo fight. Near the end, you have the option to call Ralsei and Susie for help, which prompts the flavour text; 'Kris called for Susie and Ralsei... But nobody came'. After that, you have to call Noelle for help to finish the battle, which prompts the dialogue; 'You called for Noelle'. Spamton states that Kris could barely whisper her name. They're trying to stop you from calling for her. Those aren't their words. I think that kind of confirms that they didn't want Snowgrave to happen. Kris is just a funny teenager with identity issues, they're not evil. Sorry evil Kris fans.

Kris probably isn't the Roaring Knight. They're A knight, but not THE knight. So far, they don't REALLY have any motivation for opening the first two fountains that I'm aware of, and I doubt they knew they could open a fountain until Queen's speech at the end of Chapter 2. At the end of Chapter 2, however, they do seem to have a motivation to open a fountain. They (presumably) slash Toriel's tyres to stop her from leaving the house to go and get flour. They want her to see the Dark World. And if you choose the option to talk to Undyne about the Dark World, Kris explains it to her in FULL DETAIL, but she brushes it off as a joke. Toriel finding her tyres slashed leads her to call the guards, and Kris leaves the door of the house wide open. They want Undyne to see the Dark World, I don't know WHY, but they do for some reason. But I REALLY doubt they're the Roaring Knight, they just don't have the motivation, and if it is them, it would be really weird for Toby to reveal that so early. I really doubt that kid wants to bring on the end of the world.

That's all I have for now!! Expect a more fleshed out version of this next time I play Deltarune with screenshots and such, though I may wait until chapter 3 and 4 come out! Thanks for reading!

[calware]

would you ever share a list of your fave fics to reread ? Id love to hear your recommendations and faves

sure thing :) i'm only going to list works that have been going on for a while (or at least have gotten past the very beginning of the story) and that i've read all the way through. i'm also not going to list any of the super iconic fics i like because this list is already pretty long. these are all based on stuff that i personally find more interesting to read about, mostly focused on the human characters and not a lot of romance

i don't really know if these first two count but they're too good to not include:

Jade Route by spicyyeti

a post-epilogues comic centering around jade, this is my favorite homestuck fanwork. i especially love the artwork and the way it frames the story. it is reaaallllly hard to read it on a phone so make sure to read it on a computer or tablet

House of Dirk by imarriedacherub no rating - graphic depictions of violence - 13,570 words - 20 chapters (unfinished) A sitcom about completely normal and well-adjusted newlyweds Dirk and Caliborn attempting to make a good impression on their son, Dave, and his boyfriend, Karkat.

another comic, this one hosted on both ao3 and mspfa (though the ao3 version has more pages). i like how ridiculous it is. will probably never be finished, sadly

moving on to the actual fics:

Reallocated by breezefulskies mature - chose not to use archive warnings - 324,756 words - 65 chapters (unfinished) Hal finds himself stranded aboard a certain meteor, impact-bound for Houston, Texas circa 1995. And everything spirals out from there. Because sometimes, when a system seems to be just short of defunct, all that is required is to take a step back and reevaluate the materials at hand and redistribute your available resources. And so, with birth comes a countdown on a cycle that begins as it ends: In the red.

hal is mysteriously sent to earth via unknown means and finds himself raising a baby as best as he can, which, given that he's glasses, is not easy. this is my favorite homestuck fic, not just because it's about hal, but also because i love the focus on family dynamics and the plot as it unfolds. begging everyone to read this, i can't say what happens exactly without spoiling things, it's just really really good. at the moment, it updates once a month

Ersatz Abyss by katreal mature - no archive warnings apply - 120,092 words - 39 chapters (unfinished) You look into the mirror to find your own face looking back at you. You laugh. And then you cry. Last, you try and figure out how you got to this moment. The Auto-Responder had long since resigned himself to an artificial existence, his only dwindling hope for escape hinging on a promise that has yet to be fulfilled. Then one day he wakes up, Dirk nowhere to be found. What's the point in getting what you want, if you can't show off a little?

another great hal fic. i managed to get my roommate (who has not read homestuck) to read this and they really enjoyed it, so i'm sure you all won't have any problems liking this one either. there are a lot of fics out there of hal getting a body, but this one is very different in that it's not the happy ending that you might first think it is. this fic perfects the feeling of everything snowballing into a bigger and bigger problem until it all falls apart

Falling for the First Time by nobrandhero teen - no warnings apply - 63,818 words - 11/17 chapters The game is over, Alpha Earth resets to 2009, and Dirk's bro doesn't live up to expectations. The movie director who appears so chill and stoic in interviews is actually a talkative, needy dweeb like his teenage counterpart. It's not a bad thing, as far as Dirk's concerned.

for whatever reason, i'm a sucker for fics where the characters somehow end up on earth again post-game, and out of all the fics that follow that concept this one is my favorite. sadly, this one barely touches on jane and jake, but it's pretty interesting to read about what dirk and roxy are getting up to with their guardians (and the earth) restored to their previous conditions

The Haunted Harley House by hemoanarchists teen - chose not to use archive warnings - 78,462 words - 23 chapters (finished) There is an old house you built a long long time ago, alongside someone very close to you. Now as you don a new name, slipping back into society to care for a descendant, to whom tragedy has left you as her only family left, you take her to the house, the house that bears your family name. You really shouldn't have been surprised when he came to join you. It is his house too, after all.

carlah, a young girl who lives on earth c, has just been taken in by her uncle "jacob harley" after her mother's death. as time goes on, she slowly learns more about the true nature of her new guardians and the house they all live in. normally i'm not that interested in OCs but i love how intriguing carlah is as an outsider of the story. it's really easy to get invested in her as she uncovers a mystery we all know from the beginning and another that we have to learn along with her. shoutout to dysfunctional family dynamics

actually, while i'm at it, i'm going to recommend a bunch of other stuff he's written:

Atlantis Bound teen - chose not to use archive warnings - 33,263 words - 8 chapters (unfinished) Dirk tracks down an old friend

prequel to the haunted harley house but can also be read after (or separately). i really like the dynamic between dirk and vriska here, and i also love the way vriska's repeated reincarnation is utilized. vriska's journey through the newest iteration of her life while dirk watches over her is soooo captivating, especially when snippets of her previous lives are sprinkled in throughout. do you guys love cycles? personally i love cycles

Cherubian mature - chose not to use archive warnings - 54,011 words - 29 chapters (unfinished) The 5000 year time skip never happened, at the dawn of time the gods desperately try to guide the planet into a better future. But with tensions rising it feels like one bad day could bring everything crumbling down.

all of dante's earth-c god fics as a whole changed my brain chemistry and this acts as the beginning (and catalyst) of that overarching story. a lot happens in a very short amount of time

Transitional teen - no warnings apply - 1,860 words - oneshot a simple question what changed when you went godtier?

super simple but also an interesting exploration of the headcanon that players' bodies change when they go godtier. the twist is that each "change" is unique to each character and relates to their Self in some way

Monster under the bed teen - chose not to use archive warnings - 2,573 words - oneshot Skeletons in the Closet mature - chose not to use archive warnings - 2,910 words - oneshot Small Talk teen - no warnings apply - 8,944 words - 6 chapters (unfinished)

putting all three of these together because i believe(?) they're all part of the same narrative

[teacups-and-saucers]

If you liked NBC's Hannibal, you might like Butter by Asako Yuzuki.

I picked this book up from the bookstore after reading the premise online and getting a very Hannibal vibe from it. Pretty much it's about this journalist who gets intrigued by a chef serial killer. Also, they're both women.

So I was like 'ooh I might like this'. I wasn't getting my hopes up though.

However, within 2 chapters, it's like if Hannibal tried seducing Will not through murder and cannibalism, but through food.

THE MANIPULATION. THE MEETINGS IN A ROOM IN A PRISON WITH GLASS BETWEEN THEM. THE SLOW CHANGE OF THE PROTAGONIST'S MINDSET INTO THAT OF THE ANTAGONIST'S, ALL WHILE SEEMING TO MAINTAIN AGENCY.

Not to mention that Butter's antagonist is three things: fond of an affluent lifestyle, is particular with food, cuisine, and ingredients, and is not bothered by being accused of murder. If you're a Hannibal-scammed-his-old-rich-patients-to-include-him-in-their-wills truther, this antagonist is on a similar vein too.

And similar to Will Graham, Butter's protagonist is someone who, while fit for the lifestyle that the antagonist lives, had never actively sought that kind of life despite being around it for a very long time. And through her stubbornness to keep interacting with the antagonist, Butter's protagonist, like Will Graham, ends up getting sucked into and eventually personalizing the lifestyle that the antagonist wanted her to take part in.

Like Hannibal, Butter has aspects of visiting a hometown to get to know someone better, an odd kind of friendship forming from manipulation, and lonely main characters. It also has a bit of Hannibal's S1 actions not being unique toward Will, but the relationship and interest that gets cultivated being one of a kind for Hannibal. That kind of 'you're just another interesting specimen' to "I'm intrigued." "Obsessively." pipeline.

It doesn't really have any romantic subplots, so if that's what you're looking for, you'll be disappointed. But other than that, Butter and Hannibal have a lot of themes and plotlines in common that might make Butter an enjoyable read for some Fannibals. The way Butter handles the themes definitely differs by the end, but if you're just in it for the ride, it might just work out.

Oh, and Butter focuses a lot on French cuisine. It's like if Hannibal indulged in describing the food he makes rather than gave a rundown of the ingredients and a brief history. Sometimes I felt like that would've been what it sounded like in his head when he thought about food.

Anyway, if you're a Fannibal who likes to read, give Butter by Asako Yuzuki a try. I know I would've enjoyed Butter on its own, but having read it while being obsessed with Hannibal made me love it so much more.

[foxglovegames]

DEVLOG: AUGUST 2024 🦇

It's already time for the August wrap-up??

Demo Progress

It seems no matter how much we get done, there is always more work to do haha! That said, August has been a good month and we have made a lot of exciting progress on the demo for BURN THE MIDNIGHT OIL. :)

Programming

Please welcome Renbie to the team as our lead programmer! 🙌

The past week have been spent prepping sprites and setting things up in Ren'py. Although we still have a long way to go, the game feels more real than ever now which is both exciting and scary!

If you followed the development of Trouble Comes Twice, you might already know that programming was a big hurdle for us and a major source of frustration. ;( Now that we've got some more experience under the belt thanks to Trouble Comes Twice, we already feel a lot more confident but having a dedicated programmer on the team is going to be a massive help both time and quality-wise. As a bonus: Renbie's also super lovely to work with, so we're super happy to have her onboard!

Art

We mostly made progress on promotional assets. We decided on a sketch for our key art (check out a little sneak peek at the top of this post) and received the first sketches for some of our merch designs! They're looking super cute!

Writing

With the demo script done and dusted, most of August was spent outlining the main game's six romance routes. The routes (subject to change) have five chapters each and various longer endings and shorter 'bad/death' ends based on your decisions.

BURN THE MIDNIGHT OIL has dual protagonists, so similarly to Trouble Comes Twice, we're two writers in charge of one MC each (and the MC's respective three routes). Unlike Trouble Comes Twice though, the cast here is a lot larger and not as (directly) connected.

So, how do we outline our routes? First, we wrote shorter summaries of each route - including important themes, character motivations, etc - which we then go over together. Although the plots of the two protagonists are very different, we have to make sure we keep the same 'themes and vibes'. We also need to be careful that the pacing and the scopes of the routes aren't too wildly different!

With the feedback from the shorter summaries, we move on to write the detailed outlines. (Here, we regularly reach out to each other and get feedback on minor elements and sometimes run brainstorming sessions when one of us runs into a wall.) Once these are done, we're going to have another review and write as many drafts as it takes until the routes are ready to enter the writing phase!

We're super excited about a lot of these scenes we've got planned and though you guys don't know much about the project yet, we think you're going to love the ideas we've got once it's time to learn more! We learned so much from Trouble Comes Twice that we can't wait to apply to this game! 🖤

Goals for September

There's too many little goals to count! But the major ones are:

Start looking for music composers, item artist, visual effects artist - we're not doing a public post for these, but if you or someone you know might be interested in one of these roles, shoot us a DM! ;)

Making as much progress as possible on the remaining UI screens

Making as much progress as possible on the merch designs

Continue working on the detailed outlines

Continue programming yay

Fingers crossed, we can get the key art done and dusted!

There's still so much to do, but we really look forward to the next couple of months!

[insomnya777]

Hello! First I want to say I adore your boat boys super power AU so much, it’s currently rotating at light speed in my brain like a broken microwave. I think I’ve read at least six times all the way through with what you have, it’s fantastic!

I was also wondering if you had any other recs or personal favorites for boat boys fics, or just fics in general, I’m always looking for recommendations and wonderful authors usually also have great tastes in other fics as well! Thank you for what you do for the boat boy and smalletho community, you’re keeping us well fed lol

Oh my god I have many many recommendations!!!! I've actually been waiting for someone to ask me this LOL

Completed:

Settled is one of my favourites of all-time. If you read it you'll see the long ass comment I left on it lol. Description: A five plus one type of fic where Etho struggles to voice his feeling about double-life, and Joel is there to make it harder.

BIR Universe is a classic, a staple, even. One of the most iconic series of all time. Description: A very messy college universe with a bunch of hermitcraft/life series members.

Somehow, I always end up back in Marianas Trench is another personal favourite. I reread it way too often. The writing is incredible in this one + has a side of ranchers and impdubs. Description: AU where our three favourite soulbound couples go on a triple date! Except it's not a date, all of them broke up sometime before or during their last year of college and none of them are over each other.

Holy Father, judge my sins is so, so good. Anything by giddyfenix always is, I think I've read, like, all of their works. Description: Joel and Etho as the seven deadly sins. After all, what were they if not corrupted?

I Don't Smoke (Except for When I'm Missing You) made my heart break a million times over. I actually cannot read this fic without breaking down. It is a clockers-centered fic, exploring the Etho-Scar relationship, but I had to include it because it's just one of my favourite fics of all time. Description: A look into Etho's perspective on the life he and Scar share. They're not so different, you know? They both like to run away.

Works In Progress:

to all the ships at sea is another personal favourite, because the writing is just so, so good. There are currently six chapters out! Description: Etho has a job as part of the crew manning a lighthouse on a small island. With Cleo and Bdubs gone for a few weeks, Etho settles in to keep the Light running single-handedly. He wasn't expecting his life to be turned upside-down when a visitor turns up on the island, completely out of the blue...and he definitely wasn't expecting to develop feelings for the mysterious young man.

Good Luck, Babe is also very, very good. There are seven chapters out right now! Description: Etho couldn't get himself to turn Joel down. Even when Joel has made it clear time and time again that he had no problem doing the same to him. The lengths he was willing to go for a guy who would barely even let them be seen together in public...

hi, etho is super cute, too. I read it a while ago, and it's still one of my favourites, so do what you will with that. Description: About a month after going missing and having no memories to show for it, Etho gets a weird letter from a strange, anonymous sender who might have the answers to his questions.

And that's about it!! If anyone has more recommendations feel free to comment or leave in the tags because I'm always looking for more fics LOL <3

[queer-ragnelle]

hey awhile ago you posted like a reading list for stuff about Galahad and I was wondering if you had anything similar about Dinadan? I'm reading Malory at the moment and have been entranced by his normal guy swag

Hello there!

Ultimately my goal for my retellings page is to have a JavaScript-based theme that allows for book sorting with tags, which includes characters, so one can find whatever they want to read. In the mean time, I’ll list out some recommendations of medieval literature, retellings, even some screen appearances for Dan!

Medieval Literature

La Tavola Ritonda (Tristan & The Round Table)

This is an Italian rendition of the Prose Tristan (where Dinadan originates from). I prefer it in every way to the Prose Tristan. I love it so much that I scanned it myself! It predates Le Morte D’Arthur! So while Dinadan’s brothers Daniel & Brunor are in it, Brunor is not yet nicknamed La Cote Male Taile, that doesn’t come until Malory. Dinadan’s apparent queerness (whether that be interpreted as asexuality or something else) shines here. There’s even a part where Tristan plays a prank on him by sneaking into his bed & kissing him, pretending to be their host who was interested in Dinadan earlier, & Dinadan not only freaks out in the moment (duh) but then refuses to forgive Tristan & gives him the silent treatment for several chapters. I find this compelling that Dinadan is given an emotional depth here he’s rarely afforded, & sticks to his guns, even though Tristan whines that he wants Dinadan to talk to him, (without really apologizing…). All names are in Italian, so while “Dinadano” is recognizable as Dinadan, others are harder to place. Here’s a name guide I made in case you need it!

Byelorussian Tristan

Divdan [Dinadan] makes a small appearance in this text during a joust. It's said he's "more pleasing to the maidens than to the other knights." What did the Russian storyteller mean by this?

Le Román de Tristan le roman de Palamede (in French)

This story is in French & has yet to be translated into English. But I’ll put it here anyway just in case you’re able to read that or as a reminder for later when it does get translated. Anyway Dinadan is here as a good friend of Palamedes.

Retellings

The Fortunate Island by Max Adeler

Really whacky story. I haven't finished reading it yet, but it's full of crackships, including a version of Dagonet interested in Ysolt, who in turn loves, Bleoberis who is too poor to marry anybody. Shenanigans. Anyway Dinadan is interested in this girl Matilda only for Agravaine, of all people, to propose to her immediately after being introduced. Hilarious. Someone should remind these guys they're both queer. In any case Matilda slaps him because she really is interested in Dinadan. The story is more reminiscent of the 1880s culture than medieval, with Dinadan sharing a smoke with Matilda's father then offering her a drag. Dinadan continues to have a weird rivalry with Agravaine for her affection as Agravaine apparently cannot tell she's uninterested. Typical Orkney bro behavior to interpret violence as love. So even though this story depicts Dinadan differently than his "allergic-to-love" medieval counterpart, he remains the most sensible of the characters. Which is close enough.

The Birth of Galahad by Richard Hovey

Dinadan first appears in this drama after he’s rescued from his imprisonment at the hands of the enemy Roman forces. He’s listed in the cast as “friend of Tristram of Lyonesse” which is cute but made funny as Dinadan complains about having to bring reinforcements to the war while Tristram stayed home. Dinadan whinges about Tristram’s tryst with Iseult. Meanwhile nobody who's been away since the start of the war has even heard of her yet, while Launcelot claims he knows nothing. Dinadan's loose lips get a pass here, he was a prisoner of war for who knows how long. They beat his manners right out of him!

A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court by Mark Twain

Dinadan doesn’t play a huge part in this novel, but chapter 4 is named for him, “Sir Dinadan the Humorist.” He has the characterization of a washed up jester/failed comedian. The main character Hank is kind to him though & tries to laugh at his jokes, if only because Dinadan had spared him the scrutiny/mockery he affords some other knights.

The Song of Dinadan by Ernest Rhys

This collection has a short lay dedicated to Dinadan which is reminiscent of his discussion regarding love he has with Isolde in Le Morte d'Arthur.

Sir Dinadan in The Goose Girl by Theodore Goodridge Roberts

This is a short story originally published in 1951 but republished with the anthology The Chronicles of the Round Table edited by Mike Ashley. It's silly & light-hearted. Dinadan is forced to leave his squire with a hermit after he gets sick, then he encounters a goose girl who tells him of a castle held prisoner by a brutish knight from outside the moat, for if he can't have the damsel within, no one can. Dinadan bemoans that all his quests result in entanglement with women but he follows the goose girl to try & defeat the knight because he "needs the money." The goose girl squires for him & saves his life multiple times as the knight & his squire fight dirty despite Dinadan's insistence on chivalry

The Enchanted Cup by Dorothy James Roberts

A retelling of Tristram/Isoud’s romance. Dinadan takes on a slightly different role here as he’s older than Tristram & more of a mentor. (Gouvernail is still here; Tristram is collecting father figures in this one.) But Dinadan is the first member of the Round Table that Tristram meets & he finds his quick wittedness endearing. Tristram also finds him fascinating because he’s so short & “prefers eating to fighting,” as Andret said, so Dinadan challenges what Tristram expected a knight to be. Dinadan has his usual “I’d rather not fight unless I have to” attitude & still holds fast to his opinions about love, although he’s less animated about it here compared to other stories where he’s combative. He comes across as wise rather than spirited in his opinions, particularly because Tristram’s prepared to risk it all for Isould, & Dinadan finds himself in Tristram’s corner when it comes time to choose sides. Anyway I really love the prose & banter in this book. Great dialogue, really feels natural & holds my attention. It’s extremely 1950s in its handling of Palamides, not kind to him at all, but barring that, it’s really solid.

Child of the Northern Spring by Persia Woolley

Queen of the Summer Stars by Persia Woolley

Guinevere: The Legend in Autumn by Persia Woolley

Dinadan is present in all three books of the trilogy, but mostly the second one. He's Tristan's best friend & right hand man. Dinadan reminds Tristan of his manners & formalities his hastier companion often neglects. They're both musicians & bond over a love of music. My biggest warning with this series is that Isolde is a child bride, so every plot line surrounding her, including Dinadan's criticisms of her relationship with Tristan, hit different. The whole Prose Tristan gang is here though, including Branwen, Palomides, & Lamorak.

The Ballad of Sir Dinadan by Gerald Morris

Dinadan is the main character! Woo hoo! He’s the less popular brother of Tristan. The book emphasizes Dinadan’s queerness which is enjoyable to read. He’s in his early twenties so he’s just heading out into the world & exploring himself at the same time. He goes on many adventures, including joining Kai & Bedivere to aid Culhwch in his tasks so he can marry Olwen, developing a deep friendship with Brangienne & Palomides, & having to come to his brother Tristan’s aid whenever his fragile mental state gets him into trouble out in the wilderness. All the while Dinadan connects with those around him through a love of music. He plays the rebec! He reappears in later books for the resolution of the Squire’s Tales series. Even though this book is in the middle of the series, it can be read independently, although I do recommend the entire thing.

Sir Tristan is Just Awful by Jeffrey Wikstrom

This is the third book in a five book series that parodies Le Morte d'Arthur. I haven't read this series in full yet as someone only recently made it into PDFs for me to share, but Dinadan retains his sarcastic humor & queer swag. It's implied he & Palomides have sex, so make of that what you will!

Lancelot by Gwen Rowley

Gawain by Gwen Rowley

Two romance books in a series, one about Elaine/Lancelot & the other Ragnelle/Gawain. However, Dinadan is a prominent side character. Lancelot technically came first, but they can be read in either order. The whole incident with the dress from Le Morte d’Arthur is in both books, as their timelines overlap a bit from the respective points of view. Dinadan is a friend of Gawain’s that shows up again in the Lancelot book many years after the events of the Gawain book ended. I really enjoy his character here, he’s pretty funny.

The Bright Sword by Lev Grossman

Brand new book that just came out this year. The true main character is an OC named Collum, but Dinadan is one of the last surviving members of the Round Table, & several chapters are dedicated to his backstory from his own perspective. Without spoiling too much (since it’s so new), Dinadan is explicitly queer here, as well as some other characters. He’s friends with Palomides here who evidentially knows the secret of his queerness before any others. I will say, Dinadan doesn’t feel very much like his medieval counterpart in terms of characterization, he doesn’t express any negative opinions about love. He feels more like a guy the author happened to call Dinadan. However, I still enjoyed the book!

Movies

Camelot (1967)

In this musical, Guinevere recruits three champions in the hopes of defeating Lancelot, including Lionel, Sagramore, & Dinadan! She has a duet with each of them. Dinadan is present for the Lusty Month of May song as well. He gets a whole joust with Lancelot that turns bad. Winds up a super important catalyst character for the plot!

A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court (1970)

Animated adaptation of Mark Twain’s book of the same name. The most faithful one too. It adapts the "Sir Dinadan the Humorist" chapter from the book. Dinadan rides through during a joust after the first bout ends to crack jokes with Arthur & Hank. He then falls off his horse. This movie also includes Dinadan’s brother, La Cote Male Taile.

And that's all I have for you! Unfortunately, Dinadan doesn't appear in any Tristan/Isolde movies at all, which is a huge bummer. Ironically, the movies he does appear in lack Tristan/Isolde entirely! But he's got some great literary appearances I think you'll enjoy.

A note: The archive I usually download books from is currently down, so a couple links go to the Internet Archive or The Camelot Project where they can be read but not obtained. When I'm able to download and archive the books, I'll update the links so everyone can save the PDFs themselves, especially because The Camelot Project's formatting is hard on the eyes. But most of the links lead to PDFs you can download right now!

Hope that gives you plenty of Dinadan to enjoy. Take care!

[randomdragonfires]

Fabulous chapter 3 of Time Can't Stop Me Quite Like You Did btw.

So I'm guessing he's legit sleeping with both? but damn I hope she tells him she's figured out who the other woman is..

Hello lovely anon! Thank you ::)

With regards to Aemond's little mess and Alys being labelled 'the other woman,' I have some thoughts. Long character dissection below.

Aemond has always been more mature and well-read than his peers, but this trait truly began to show after his accident. The loss of his eye compounded his insecurities, making him feel as though he needed to work harder to compensate for what he had lost. His desire to gain his father Viserys’s approval became a driving force, as he saw how effortlessly Rhaenyra's children seemed to win their father’s favor, a favor he never received. While Aemond is undoubtedly angry at his father’s lack of reaction to his injury, much of his motivation stems from deeper insecurities and a yearning for his father to be better, particularly toward his mother and siblings.

This desire to impress Viserys shaped Aemond into someone highly focused and driven. He dedicated himself to performing exceptionally in everything he did, but at the cost of becoming emotionally distant. While he maintained surface-level friendships with those in his orbit - the children of wealthy families who would eventually become business collaborators or competition - he never truly allowed anyone to get too close unless they're his mother, his siblings or Cole. In this regard, his connections were strategic, rather than personal.

Wylde however, is a different case.

Given her mother's friendship with Alicent and her eventual passing, Wylde is brought into the fold as much as Alicent deems appropriate. She's not the best mother by any means - she's not even that open with her own children, as is the case with most society mothers - but she sees that the kids take care of each other, so she simply enables Wylde's presence by welcoming her and lets them grow together. There is a certain comfort in it for her, given how her negligent Viserys was to the point of driving a perfect woman like her to an affair with Cole the bodyguard - the man who eventually becomes the calm in her storm, the love of her life.

Wylde basically grows up as part of the unit. Aegon takes on a big brother mantle even if he's not interacting with them on a regular basis - remember that scene where he's dancing with a kid!Wylde in the first chapter?

She is a fairly important presence in Helaena's life - it isn't much, but given how inclined she is to not go out there and stick to her own family, it's a lot. Daeron and Wylde of course grow up thick as thieves - same age, same classes, all of it. They're the definition of the young friendship trope and they've been in it all.

Aemond, however, was not initially part of this close-knit orbit. From a young age, he kept mostly to himself. Though he was aware of his popularity as a teenager - after all, he was the brooding, motorcycle-riding billionaire heir with perfect grades - he was careful to avoid emotional entanglements outside of what he's already got. The other kids may have admired him, but Aemond’s introverted nature allowed him to maintain a sharp, disciplined focus. Still, for all his emotional distance, Aemond held a soft spot for those who had been in his life for a long time, including Wylde, even if he didn’t initially interact with her much.

Aemond grew up in a conservative, old-money family where Alicent’s strict parenting set certain expectations, yet his worldview shifted significantly after meeting Alys at university. Alys was a woman who had lived - someone who had experienced life, pain, and pleasure in a way Aemond never had. She introduced him to a new way of being: one where a person could be at the pinnacle of success, the most well-read in the room, and still indulge in life’s pleasures without compromising their guard.

For Aemond, this was a revelation. His entire persona had been built around the idea of staying emotionally detached to avoid being hurt. Alys, however, showed him that he could live both worlds - he could enjoy life while staying sharp and focused. Their intellectual and emotional compatibility intrigued him, and their chemistry kept him hooked. He was drawn to her not just because of her knowledge, but because of the way she navigated the world with such control. Aemond’s relationship with Alys is more than just attraction - it’s about learning a new way to protect himself while still being able to not just live, but thrive. Imagine a worldly, mysterious and intriguing professor with society connects and crazy stories, all with a sad past to match - that's Alys. How can he possibly say no to that?

So no, she's not the other woman. Not in Aemond's eyes. She's someone that's widened his horizons. BUT Wylde won't see it that way - her reaction to it is natural. Concern, worry - and because she's grown feelings for him, hurt.

Despite his want to maintain the casual nature of it all, there are things that he doesn't account for - that Alys is an unattached to her partners as they come, and his feelings for Wylde (and hers for him) are too serious to involve someone else.

Aemond’s growing attachment to both Alys and Wylde sets the stage for a messy chapter 3. He believes that if Alys can balance her emotional detachment with the pleasures of life, he can too. What he doesn’t realize, though, is that Alys is emotionally removed from her partners by choice, while his feelings for Wylde - and hers for him - are far too serious to involve someone else. He’s playing a dangerous game, caught between two women and two very different sets of emotions.

The final chapter of their story will be a mess of unresolved feelings and emotional tension, leading to where Aemond will have to confront the reality of his relationships with both Alys and Wylde and figuring out what he wants, ultimately. I’ve taken a fair amount of inspiration from Sally Rooney in terms of tone, trying to keep the dynamics as realistic and emotionally grounded as possible. The hope is that I don't make it a wild ride, but simply as a part of their lives that is beyond their control and overwhelming, if you get what I mean.

Anyway, sorry about the rambling lmao. I just needed to discuss the POVs and motivations, really. I've been talking about this with @humanpurposes @chattylurker and @aemondstark a lot, and it's quite nice to have someone ask me about the mess that is this triangle hehe.

[no-psi-nan]

"Kuniharu is a kind and funny dad, you're misconstruing canon if you call him abusive!!"

Literal intro chapter, the very first serialized chapter & first episode of the whole series:

- Kuniharu lies to his son in an attempt to guilt-trip him

- Kuniharu thinks about, then suggests to his son that he start stealing money

- Kusuo himself introduces his dad as a shameless and pitiable sleazeball.

- Kuniharu dehumanizes his son by calling him "Kusuemon", a reference to Doraemon, a robot cat that serves a human.

- It's revealed that Kuniharu "carelessly flew into a rage and smashed all the window panes in the house" because his "beloved" wife ate one (1) dessert out of the fridge, and he thinks that's a just and proportionate response and that "[they're] both to blame".

For reference, their house looks like this:

That's a lot of windows!

And even in the case of it being a gag manga, smashing all the windows in his own house over a minor offense by his wife is a completely insane level of retaliation. It doesn't matter that his son can instantly repair the house, the fact of the matter is that he had a long and extended violent outburst against his wife IN HIS INTRO EPISODE!!!!!!!

Kuniharu was NEVER meant to be seen as a good person because he's not. He's (at BEST) a constant source of annoyance for his son and a crappy husband who can't even do his job right, licking shoes to compensate for his ongoing problems at work:

It's fine to enjoy him as a character, he IS really funny in his insanity, but to say that people are making stuff up about him being abusive is a ridiculous statement.

The concept of "child abuse" includes psychological and emotional mistreatment or neglect by a parent, it's not just about physical assault. One definition of psychological child abuse is:

"A repeated pattern of caregiver behavior or extreme incident(s) that convey to children that they are worthless, flawed, unloved, unwanted, endangered, or only of value in meeting another's needs."

Kuniharu hardly interacts with his son except to seek favors or to try to assert dominance/superiority. He constantly refers to Kusuo as a monster/robot/nonhuman (dehumanization, another form of abuse).

During the favorability/love meter chapter, both Kuniharu and Kusuo were certain that the love score would be very low due how little Kuniharu cares for his son. The fact that the score doesn't go down doesn't actually mean much if his literal mind-reading son could not tell that he was loved.

In fact, just as Kusuo's kindness can be explained by Kurumi's influence, Kusuo's tendency to self-blame, his trouble forming bonds with others, and his extreme conflict-avoidance can be seen as classic results of childhood emotional/psychological abuse.

And sure, Kusuke (who's introduced wayyyyyyyy later) might be the source of some of this trauma, but literally who raised him lol?

Anyways. You're ignoring canon if you think Kuniharu is a good dad or person, which is fine! Just recognize that.

"It's a gag manga, it's not that serious" <- Even in a gag manga world, Kusuo himself says that his dad is kind of garbage and that his mother is the only reason he hasn't exploded the planet. And the whole premise of the series is that he's fucking miserable.

The fact that bad things are presented in a funny way doesn't make them less bad, especially not from an in-canon perspective. A war in a gag manga is not really that funny to the characters themselves.

And exploring different aspects of a work is literally one of the main activities to do in fandom. If you only want to see exactly what's in the show exactly as it's presented in the show, then go rewatch it! Maybe you'll catch a few more details this time too.