#but they dont care because they want to win
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if we hire That gm i dont even know what i will do as a fan tbh. i dont know if i can stomach More of my two favorite players playing in my face all for the sake of winning
yeah its. well. like if any of those men involved get a job in the nhl/w the oilers it’s just another instance of “the worst thing you can be in professional sports is bad at the sport” (obviously also applies to those involved w the wjc 2018 case) which is bleak quite frankly because a drive to win comes w many costs one of them being morality and like. sure it has nothing to do w the players’ morality (as we see it/as they are to the public) if they play for a shitty gm (up and until they say something/do something etc etc) but hockey is a team sport through and through and in the nhl the gm and the owner and the ceo are all part of that team they’ll get their names engraved on the cup next to the players and the coach and could you celebrate an oilers’ cup win knowing that the organisation itself is rotten top down
#i will be the first to admit we r worrying about eggs that havent hatched yet but the fact that its a possibility and that he’s a top#candidate or wtvr is sickening and disappointing and the bar is on the fucking floor for these teams and theyve managed to find a way under#it w the rumour#and like. most men in the nhl are not good men <- players and staff and pencil pushery types#but they dont care because they want to win#they’ll hire men who’d be in jail if there were a fair system in place and those men had less money because they know ultimately its only#going to be the name on the cup that lasts#[redacted] tumblr user#asks#wjc 2018
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The sensation of waking up next to you ❤️💙
+bonus doodle:
…and they mimir’d happily ever after the end. ❤️
(ID under cut!)
Miles is roused from sleep by sunlight shining on his face. Slowly, his eyes adjust to the light, until finally, his scope of awareness broadens to a body he had been sleeping on.
Page 2
Miles looks up to the figure that holds him, and upon seeing, his eyes widen in recognition.
Miles looks up to the figure that holds him, and upon seeing, his eyes widen in recognition.
The bottom panel of the page shows minimal details of a window shedding light onto the bed and blankets as seen from a higher view in the room.
Page 3
On the other side of the bed, Phoenix rests, his head propped by the headboard. His hair is messy from sleep, and his expression is thoughtful. The light of the morning highlights his features.
The sun shines through the blinds of the window.
Phoenix finally notices his observer, and turns to look at him.
Page 4
Phoenix takes Miles’ hand in his, and lifts it to gently kiss the ring on Miles’ finger. They both move to share a kiss, and their hands shift to hold one another. Miles’ ring sparkles in the sunlight.
Page 5
They link their fingers as they kiss, and the morning creates a quiet atmosphere around them.
They part, but remain close, their fingers fully interlocked. Phoenix greets “Good morning,” with a tender, loving expression as he looks at Miles. Miles’ own expression is soft, unguarded, and fixed on Phoenix.
Page 6
Phoenix and Miles settle back into their shared bed; the morning sun illuminates them. They both smile softly, seeming happy and at peace. Miles rests his head under Phoenix’s neck, and his hand on Phoenix’s chest. One of Phoenix’s hands rests over Miles’ own on his chest, while his other hand holds Miles closer, revealing a matching ring of his own. Both rings shine softly in the sunlight.
Bonus image
A small simple drawing of Phoenix and Miles having fallen asleep again while holding each other as in the final page of the comic.
End ID.]
#narumitsu#wrightworth#phoenix wright#miles edgeworth#ace attorney#this is so sappy i nearly choked the entire time i was drawing it#aa#fan art#smooches#ah yes my favorite tag <3#rendevok#this is vaguely set post AA5 but i truly have no timeline in mind i just want them married#like ding DONG bitches get ur shit together aren’t u tired of pining??? it’s time to go apeshitt and furiously makeout#i’m going to start mashing them together like dolls i dont care anymore!!!#NRMTS KISS RIGHT NOW OR IM BITING BOTH OF YOU#(a win win situation for me)#anyway if you can’t tell i am deeply in love with phoenix and projecting onto miles so hard#who doesn’t love making him down horrendous for a little flavor?#image description and alt text are the same because i suck at those still#writing that out was deeply embarrassing for me bc for whatever reason writing it out is something WAY more visceral than drawing it#i wish to evaporate nobody look at me unless you want to talk about them kissiing more then my dms are open
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there is someone out there who insists on putting horrible comments on fics, in people's tumblr inboxes, anywhere they can get their grubby little paws. often just the usual fare for pathetic trolls - rape threats, suicide bait, the odd racial slur... occasionally, they branch out and try their hand at slightly more insidious attempts to sow discord between people.
they mostly don't make an impact, however, not only because they are so transparent, but also because anyone who has ever come into contact with this person knows full well who they are, and knowing that sort of makes the whole thing vaguely laughable.
however, now and again they sort of... widen their scope a bit, and just on the off chance that they might send their little attacks to anyone vulnerable, or unknowing, I just wanted to let you all know that they really are just the work of one very sad individual who has nothing better to do with their time. they're not a real threat to anyone, except maybe themselves. please please don't take anything they say to heart. just block, report, turn off anon comments, anything you need or want to do.
I'm not sure if they'll get bored – they haven't yet, and frankly I don't think they have much else to sustain them besides perhaps deleting and remaking endless tumblr blogs – but ignoring them wholeheartedly is genuinely what is best for you, and that is what is important.
so, look after yourselves. they're just a troll.
#also if any of you feel really gross and want to reach out to someone my inbox is always open. even if you dont know me at all#sometimes that helps. plus i can share stories of some of the weird shit this person has done that might make you laugh.#i recognise the usual rhetoric is 'dont feed the troll' and this acknowledgment might send a frisson of thrill through them#however i truly dont care. in fact i hope it does because they could do with a win#their ego is nothing to do with me. i just need to reiterate that they really are Just Some Guy.#they've been at this for well over a year now btw. lmao.#mash#mash 4077#mashblr
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at this point of the atp side i actually would be happy with every possible outcome from here on out winning the title. i literally don’t remember the last time this happened in a tournament
#i mean not strictly true im still rooting for whoever wins from the american half and jannik/danya#but like. would i say no to literally any of these men winning? not really!#this draw is just so blessed#thank you taylor alexei grigor jannik 🥰🥰#tennis#i cant say the same for wta because i dont want navarro or maia to win but i think karo and aryna will take care of them easily so whatever
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lowkey the posts where people are like 'well i need kevin to date some totally unrelated exy person' are corny for multiple reasons but i think the main one is if kevin didn't care about exy with everything he has then it's not kevin day innit. who's this other character you're imagining in your head
#and no offense to my sisters but the reason kevin is shipped with other players so often is because he actually#loves that sport. you know.#theres no doign away with exy entirely in kevins life and there shouldnt be#if he wasnt intensely obsessed with it to a point its unhealthy then its some other guy right? its not our wife#he DOES have other things. he does have other interests. but exy is the most important thing in his life for several reasons#which dont need to be changed#i think he can and does compromise often (like sending jean to the foxes' biggest rival likely knowing itll cost them the championship)#but even then u can argue his focus isnt just winning. its exy as a whole for Everyone forever#and its not the Only thing he cares about now. obviously. but to say he needs to not only Be more normal about it#but also date some person who knows nothing about what is basically the thing that kept him alive for years#so silly. he would not do that#i want kevin to get More into exy on purpose and im not kidding#txt#kevin
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the bad: i have been raised without much warmth from my parents in childhood, but also pressured to conform to familial authority, doubt myself always, and value familial connections above all else (<- failed at this, and feel guilt about it.)
but also in experiencing this i have been so isolated from the entire rest of the world and others, that it will be nearly impossible to create my own "family" -> find safety and comfort in anybody else once my family is Gone. despite dis i find it really difficult to break away from the familiar, disobey and disappoint, because, well, why are my wishes more important than anybody else's. why would I cause upset and distress in anybody, and exert so much effort into my doubt filled half decisions, for my meaningless little Wishes. being away would also mean less time with these people who I'll never see again once they're gone. being raised this way is definitely paying off for those who did so.
the good: yaaaay adjacent inspiration for writing talon lore
#talkys#my dad scaring me but also giving me no advice on what to do instead only saying if i do this it will be the wrong choice leading#to more wrong choices well yep you got me i am scared. i am inept. i fear regret and punishment for wrong decisions.#i struggle to make decisions because i cant go back on them.#''ill never have savings again'' and ''you cant value friends over family they'll abandon you''#and ''living here is only a problem for you because you dont communicate. there is a way to work things out''#i wish i could work it out and stay i dont know why i cant work it out ! and what do i want#to leave so badly for... to continue to never have stable housing#never have savings again? be alone and in danger?#to be able to wear whatever i want and...buy things? really? that doesnt seem very worth it#nothing seems very worth it#im miserable here but maybe i'd be more miserable away...it is true#well at least the chances to leave are very slim. and will continue to get slimmer the more time passes.#but maybe its fine i dont want to ruin my life or be even more of a burden or reason for distress in someone else's#moving out wouldnt fix anything. wherever you go there you are.#my friend said i have to be a little selfish (positive) to push myself to leave. bt i dont want to be selfish. im ashamed of that as a trai#delete later#even now i feel immense guilt and stress when my dad does things that hurt or bother me bc i know ill miss him when he's gone.#(and ill have nobody after all of that. due to the being kept in a cage)#that sucks. why does everyone else always win. why am i always the weakest pliable one. i wish i had no emotions#my surgery is the only decision in my life ive been 100% sure on for years#and even then my parent's words had me crying and rapidly changing emotions daily until the day came#im not strong enough or sure enough about anything else to withstand More of that#<- and i know that tomorrow im gonna be like actually you know what who cares lets try to leave#and the next day ill be resigned to staying here forever#and the next day ill be like actually you know what who cares l
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iliad alnst au with patrochilles mizisua and odydio lukahyuna (<- person who would pay to watch achilles beat odysseus into the ground)
#dont ask me whos ivantill i dont know. paris and helen. fuck it.#anyway.#odysseus is obviously a luka guy. guy that makes everyone pissed off and wanting to kill him.#diomedes may not seem like a hyuna but hear me out ok#unwavering faith that the greeks will win into unwavering faith that humanity will be free#i know if patrochilles is mizisua the instinct is hector luka which also could work but idk who the fuck hyuna is in that scenario.#hector luka menelaus?? hyuna. helen hyunwoo.#i fucking guess.#once again dont ask me about ivantill. could be odydio in the hyuluka hector-menelaus scenario.#actually kinda slay. i just like hyuluka odydio better because well. theyve already got the stabbing thing down#anyway. ! no one look me in the eyes.#patrochilles mizisua the only universe in which achilles does not die i guess. hopefully. if mizi dies i fucking kill myself.#incredibly nicheposting that none of my followers will care about brought to you by mack at 11 o clock am.#alnst#the iliad
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some1 tell me something to write/draw
#vixen rambles#i need something 2 do so i dont start eating bricks#thing abt getting told i have hashimotos is. they are Refusing to treat it.#because i have 'nothing else going on'#i am UNABLE TO WALK WITHOUT PAIN#IM NOT EVEN 20#I AM WALKING WITH A CANE DAILY#like i can tell you now. its hypothyroid arthropathy. and fuckk man all i want is to GET RID OF IT#i wnana fucking run again i wanna hike i wanna climb stairs without pain#i want to have energy again i wanna play games i wanna work i wanna live#im so sick of being called a cripple#im so sick of my entire life being classes and my room i want to be a real person again#we're trying a different doctor thurdsay to see if i can get Any kind of help. i dont care if they take the whole thyroid out#i just wanna get rid of these symptoms#MY IMMUNE SYSTEM IS EATING MY THYROID#THE THYROID IS KIND OF. A DECENTLY VITAL ORGAN. YKNOW.#'DONT SEE A REASON TO KEEP SEEING ME' LORD#GOD#sorgy. im ok#i stay winning. im batman#this will all be over in a fwe months. but GODDDD
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thinking about the elections tonight... bad, cellbit, baghera, and forever are four candidates who are devoted to the island- more specifically, to the residents of the island. They care for the eggs, and they care for each other, and the way they exhibit that care through their primary presidential strategies is fucking fascinating.
Bad is who I watch the most, so I know him best. He's a classic mother hen. He doesn't like to take risks with the eggs, and he likes to prepare. If there's any sort of variable that could hurt an egg then he wants to control it. They have a stable relationship with the federation right now- it's not great, but they know the parameters. Don't trust cucurucho. don't follow cucurucho. send the eggs to NINHO every time there's a threat. the time of day changing means you need to run. Other than that they're p okay and roughly safe. But adding a president could potentially change everything. What if the president makes a rule that makes it easier to kill the eggs? And what about the way a president could cause tensions between the players to rise even higher? The dynamics of the island could change drastically. It's safer to neutralize that threat before it ever becomes a threat. It's easier to stop a war before it can start.
Baghera's primary concern is the way the election is designed to pit the residents against each other. All of them know that the Federation is a threat and she, like Bad, is focused on not letting them hurt more people. But, unlike Bad, she's less resistant to change. If the power is spread to multiple players rather than just one, it will be harder for the Federation to corrupt any one of them. Each time before the Federation has gotten to someone it's done so by isolating them. Felps, Cellbit, Jaiden- they've all spent a lot of alone time with Cucurucho. A council isn't just to consolidate the ideals of the island; a council would protect the players themselves. Sure, there might be disagreements and arguments, but they've had those before (and they're having them now!) and there's no reason to think they wouldn't be able to get through them again.
I hit a bit of a wall with Forever and Cellbit's pov here. Everything I know about their plans are from the debates and paraphrased discussions that have been translated here on tumblr, I'm going to talk less about their explicit plan and more about what the result will entail- a single president who takes responsibility for the island. It seems to me like they've recognized the presidential seat as the powerful opportunity that it is, and they want to take advantage of it. Here's some extra personal speculation but, adding rules, adding or removing mods, proposing public works, enforcing laws- those are just the abilities that are listed. Those are incredible opportunities to make the Federation take action, which is more than they've had before. We've seen before that the Federation isn't perfect; the Federation makes mistakes.
By working with the Federation, by making them take action (in a semi-controlled, semi-predictable way) you open them up to more opportunities for them to fuck up (while benefiting you). And, maybe, one of those fuck ups will be the key to taking them down. Maybe they could reopen ender chests. Maybe they could open the nether. Maybe they could learn why the Federation is holding an election in the first place. It's possible to do all these things with Baghera's plan, sure, but that's not a guarantee and, if someone like Bad is on the council, there's absolutely no way to be sure it would get done. And, if there's a council, then that opens up everyone on the council to the Federation's wiles. If there's just one president, then that's where the Federation's focus will be. By using a single person to build a relationship with the Federation, they only risk that single person. By electing ministers instead of a council, they can ensure that the island residents' needs are being heard while placing the federation's focus on that one person. A point can be made that they've done that before- with varying results. like kidnapping. selling your soul. etc. But! overall, I think they've gained more than they've lost by singling out one person. Because of them, we know that Cucurucho can't be trusted. We know that the Federation has a series of tunnels underneath the island. We know that the Federation not only has some sort of cryo technology, but had some unknown reason to use it. We know that there was another person working with Cellbit to take care of Felps (theorized to be ElQuackity), so we know there's at least one more Fed that isn't Cucurucho + blank-faced workers. There's been risk, but there's absolutely been rewards. This is just a very long meandering way to say that their plan to sacrifice Forever to the presidential seat reminds me very much of Cellbit's plan to sacrifice himself to the federation. They're saving their friends by potentially damning themselves and I, for one, think that is cool as hell.
they all care about each other so much. bad's plan means taking on no more risk. baghera's plan means spreading that risk evenly to stand strong together. and cellbit and forever's plan means taking the risk onto themselves so they can reap the rewards for others. am i reading too much into things? no this is tumblr and this smp is about LOVE and i really genuinely think that their election plans are a fantastic example of just how much they love each other
#qsmp elections#qsmp#qsmp analysis#again i haven't been following cellbit and forever's exact plan too closely but i've gotten the sense that their pushing of public works is#just to get people to vote for them and the true reason they want forever to be president is to infiltrate the federation#if that's not it tho feel free to let me know i'd love to know these cubitos reasonings#but with my interpretation i like the silly little extra headcanon of mr cell “sold his soul to the cops” bit#subconsciously sacrificing forever to the feds and pushing him into corruption#which ALSO makes the forever-killing-cellbit-to-kick-him-out-of-the-running plan Even More Tasty#'what if i let you kill me. what if destroying me destroyed yourself. what if i have already destroyed you on purpose and you forgave me#now what if i dont mean it when i do it again'#if anyone wants to examine the other candidates (or these same ones) and figure out how their election strategy is an example of their love#please do#i don't know enoguh about the others#but i know that gegg is love-turned-grief burn-the-world-down#and foolish is love for Item. love for cloud. love for being a silly#i don't know etoiles' plan for if he gets elected but i know he also deeply loves the island and the residents#him and his security <3 and the care packages for new players <3 and the way he Craves Violence but absolutely refuses to hurt anyone who#doesn't deserve it. most guy of all time#personally i want foolish to win because i think it would be really fun#but i think that any of them (even the candidates i don't know) would be a Fantastic president#we're going to get some good roleplay any way it goes so ill be happy :3#the only mechanic thing i want is for them to open the nether but that feels like a given for anyone so im not worried about it tbh#ty for coming to my tedtalk#hello if you're reading this tag. i see youre just as un-normal about these characters as i am. or you just like to read. respect either wa
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i understand the frustration with “i made this gay pairing cis x trans so they can still have biological babies” with no thought to other methods and how ppl assume thats the case when it comes to mothpool aus where mothwing is also the mother of the three, but also…. idk i kinda dont give a shit if someone wants to do that and i dont really think its inherently transphobic as long as its handled with care and respect.
what really concerns me about this debate is how some people are adamant that you cannot portray trans people having biological children in media or youre being disrespectful. and im gonna say as a nonbinary person who doesnt want children for themself- thats kinda fucking weird? like i understand that for some people, theyre trans themselves and theyre speaking from a place of dysphoria, and i absolutely get that, which is why i think the topic should be handled with nuance and diversity in trans characters, but like…. guys. pregnant trans men exist irl. trans women get people pregnant irl. trans ppl’s ability and right to parent and have biological children are being debated irl. we get denied the opportunity to adopt as well.
in a climate like this, are we SURE we want the stance on rewrites and headcanons in the silly cat books to be “if you portray trans characters having children, especially with a gay couple, youre a transphobic freak no matter what!” does it really matter? especially if its being done by a trans person handling the topic with nuance who has a lot of trans characters with varying perspectives?
obviously yes, remember that thats not the only way certain gay couples can have kids, remember that not every trans person is fully comfortable with it and keep that in mind, remember that surrogacy and adoption are also perfectly valid ways to give fan babies- but remember that there are OPTIONS. not that you need to condemn the idea of transgender parents in the first place unless they fit the very specific criteria of “proper transgender representation” and anything that dares deviate from that is proof the op is a transphobic monster (bonus points if theyre a trans creator bc i mostly see trans people getting shit for this and it kinda pisses me off. although idm if cis people do it either as long as theyre handling it with respect)
#and this isnt getting into how trans mothwing outside of mothpool is a really good way to read her character#sorry. remembered the shit bonefall got despite being trans as well and got annoyed#that especially annoys me bc hes got plenty of surrogacies but the second hed touch a trans pregnancy#‘’no you cant do that!!! you freak!!! obviously you only see trans people as a loophole for gays to have babies!!!’’#also my gf and i were talking and obviously take this with a grain of salt bc this is our experience#but…. i think a lot of the ppl saying this……. havent really talked to trans women?#dude some of the ones i know LOVE the idea of getting people pregnant#did you know trans women have sex? did you know trans people in general have sex?? did you know trans people irl wanna start families?#did you know that? did you? or do you black out at the idea of a trans woman being anything but strictly pure and nonsexual#and OBVIOUSLY this is not every trans woman. some do have dysphoria around the idea#but im genuinely starting to wonder how these people act around irl transgender parents#whether they had kids before or after coming out#bc ngl. the attitude that thinking about this makes you a transphobic pervert?#directed at trans people making content for themselves?#im starting to think you all just dont want us to reproduce. if we reproduce we arent ‘’good’’ trans people#because a ‘’real’’ man wouldnt carry a child. a ‘’real’’ woman would carry the child. and god forbid the gays even THINK about reproducing#and being around children!#if we have children then we’re doing things that might make cishets look at us and declare we’re not perfect#we’ve proved we’re not just identical to cis ppl!! (and therefore deserving of respect!)#idk. i think this was mostly a case of tumblr going ‘’oh someone said no to this so lets push this to an unhealthy extreme!!’’#and i cant help but notice nobody really brings up nonbinary parents at all in this discussion#not that we have it ‘’better’’ or anything for that but yknow. are we supposed to swear it off?#is the idea of us having kids inconcievable? or worse…. does it mean we ‘’picked a side?’’#so its not even worth getting mad at a pregnant nb person bc ‘’well thats a woman so who cares’’b#HMMMMM.#ohhhh i bet they also get mad if you make transfem pregnancy possible too. no winning#idk really think about it when you go ‘’you can NEVER EVER portray a trans person starting a family. bc REAL trans people would never.’’#ohhh you probably get mad when trans ppl dont get surgery for one reason or another dontcha#whether we want to or its not in the cards for us for whatever reason like cost and such#(while also getting mad if we do bc we cannot win in this no matter what)
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right ways to get mad at catholics: your institution and your practice of beliefs has irreperably harmed millions of people, end the lives of more, and brought struggle and strife to many cultures on a global scale
wrong ways to get mad at catholics: you believe in "sky daddy" so you are stupid as fuck
#yall are WEIRD about this and its super fucked up#god i dont want to defend the religion i actively fought tooth and nail to get out of but sometimes you all make just. wow.#like hello? you can shit on someone's HORRIBLE orginisations without like. actively insulting the central part of *multiple* religions#you reealise thats the same god in islam? judaism? and even if it wasnt... the 'believing in god' bit isnt the bad part?#thats super fucked up to be focusing on instead of. you know. the actual attrocities caused by the catholic church#istg...#you can condemn someones practices without denying them a core part of their life. weird as shit behaviour really.#'mimse this isnt important' um yes it is bc that same rhetoric can be returned on ANY belief system so yes you do have to care#even when its turned on the people you hate#you cant be hypocritical about shit like this that's how they win. because they do that already. and we all know how that goes.#dont do what they do.
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unleashes the horrors upon you (the horrors are my gay little ocs)
#hello gays come get yalls food#myart#yes the design notes are all useless. except for like ris’ one maybe#his design is very square bc he is. er. evil#anyway i really like how they all turned out :) my little guys#didn’t even struggle with the colors for that long (lie)#ok maybe some actual design notes or something similar#wt and ris both have lighter hair streaks and wrinkes bc they are. old👍#and also ris and soar have the same hair and eye color. if u care#cd still has their fucked up eye of course <3 i like what i did with the hair too#bro cuts it themself it’s soo choppy and messy. but it’s ok it adds to the gamer charm#fta has heart shaped hair because. i want hearts to be part of his design tbh#like the gardener has a heart too. so#it’s bc he likes cute things btw. but he won’t admit it so don’t ask him#son giving you the tbh stare…. i feel like they are the type of autistic to make uncomfortable amounts of eye contact#they just dont know when to stop or look away#also their hair is matching with wt’s yayy!!! found family win i think#i mean with son it’s more like forced family but yknow#oc: weaving tales#oc: recognition in spirit#oc: cognitive dissonance#oc: spins on axis rapidly#oc: fates torn again#oc: speaks of nothing
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every so often i will see a post from a leftist on this website that is so egregiously ableist that i remember that like. oh yeah the userbase of leftists on this website is violently anti-disabled people and will jump at any chance to demonize any of us for any reason. i just forget that fact because i'm extremely dedicated to curating my space
i'm paraphrasing here but i saw a post that said, "every time i see an American [disabled person] mention being scared about the election because they're afraid of losing their benefits i have to laugh. anybody who wants blood-soaked money from the US government deserves to starve" which. like. goodness that's a lot to unpack. i think we should burn the whole suitcase instead !
#i inserted [disabled person] because they used a fucking slur instead and i didn't want that in my post#like i feel like there should be room for disabled people like me whose lives literally entirely depend on accessing said >#> extremely limited benefits in conversations about whether voting in this election makes you complicit in genocide#which like! i do understand. i do. it's nauseating to think about what this shit ass country is doing. it's horrific. i do not blame anyone#> for not wanting to be a part of that. *and* i am also terrified for my own life because i remember the first time trump won it suddenly >#> became IMPOSSIBLE for ANYONE to get on benefits. EVER. and so many disabled ppl i know went to renew benefits theyd had for decades >#> just to be denied. one of whom was a below-the-neck paraplegic. he died because he lost those benefits!!! because trump won#i really do understand why people dont feel right voting for harris. or why they don't vote at all. i truly do. but holy shit i am so scare#and yes! i am aware that people in palestine and gaza are suffering so much worse. and i wish i could change that#but every single person in power in the US is pro-israel and eagerly drinking the anti-palestine kool-aid. no matter who wins >#> things will not change in that part of the world. and it is infuriating. when the revolution comes this will change. but it hasnt.#the revolution will not save me as a physically disabled person. it will not save any of us. we do not matter to leftists. i am sorry but >#> this is the one thing i have learned after being in leftist spaces for over 10 years. and posts like the one i mentioned prove it#so i am very sorry. i really am. for being physically disabled. but i cannot survive another 4 years relying on my parents for everything#if trump wins i will be killing myself. this is a promise. i cannot do that again#i know it makes me a bad person to be afraid that harris will lose. but people on the left already think i'm a bad person for being disable#i want the genocide to stop. i absolutely do. i also want to survive. i am terrified that the US leftists will sacrifice disabled people#like me so they can feel good about being put in a real life trolley situation#again. im sorry. im so fucking sorry. i wish i was a better person. i wish i was able to give more. i know that if i was just a good#person i would be able to have a job and give to every palestinian gofundme on my dash. i would be able to do more than my daily clicks >#> and reaching out and calling representatives that don't care. if i was a good person i would be able to convince my parents that z*onism>#is deeply fucking racist. and that israel is wildly racist and killing palestinians for fun. if i was a good person i would be able to make#>them leftists too. im sorry. im sorry. im sorry im not good enough. im sorry that im scared. im so scared and it's not right for me to be#when so much worse is going on because of this countrys bloodlust. im sorry that im benefiting from being born here i dont want to be#im sorry for not having any other options. if i was a good person i know i would have them. im sorry. god im sorry im so fucking sorry
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ok last minute predictions on the artfight theme im thinking it's either arctic vs tropic or seafoam vs stardust. or maybe rain vs shine could come in with the steel chair . or maybe im completely wrong and nothing in that gif they posted is reflective of the theme at all
#i dont care about the theme that much this year because my most wanted theme finally got used last year so its jsut whatever now#i mean there were some options on the poll i didnt like that much but one of those winning wouldnt stop me from playing#i think i picked arctic vs tropic on the poll. because that was my second most liked behind vampires vs werewolves#but now that im really thinking about it idk which team i would pick if it won because i like both options
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love paying thousands of dollars so I can sit in a lecture hall and over think my identity instead of maths
#its like. god idk. the more i think about it the more i feel like i have to accept that i am just aroace?#and the more i realise i really dont want that to be true?#it just. feels so fucking lonely#like. god.#all my friends are in relationships and im not. everyone was talking about childhood crushes yesterday and i just couldn't join in. we were#fillimg out these identity chart things and there just. wasnt an option for what i was#relationships are always going to be more important than friendships and that makes sense. i get that. but that also means im always going#to be lesser to someone else#like yes amato/allonormativity is bullshit and i shouldnt listen to it but. fuck its depressing feeling like im just missing a core part of#what makes someone a real person yk. it fucking sucks#like i think im already sensitive to that bc growing up trans and neurodivergent means i already feel like ive missed out on so many#milestones#and now i have this. and im always going to have this. and it fucking sucks#like idk!! i wanna date!! i want someone to care about me in that way!! but ill never be able to do that without feeling like im decieving#them so whats the fucking point yk!!#like im just overexaggerating the few hints of sexuality i have now to at least try to pretend i have one#because at least then i can be included in those conversations and not feel like a lesser person for those few seconds#but then it changes. and im back to feeling like a freak and half of a person !! and i feel like a freak and gross whenever i di exaggerate#my sexualoty at all so yk. no winning there ig#god idk#this got uh. more depressing than i thought#i think i just already feel lowkey like shit constantly so this just makes it worse?#idk. im too tired for this shit#thumbsup#i swear im normal
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stef keeps dropping the first set n im like yay hes losing and then he wins anyways
#whatever. ofc i hope fils wins his match rn but no matter who wins both of them are able to beat stef amen#ultimately no longer care abt how far zverev gets because hes already qualified so whatever right#i dont want him to win paris tho#but i DO care abt stef because he has yet to qualify but technically still could and i dont want that#tennis
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