#but there's literally no reason for jack to have a french name

[lazyjellyfishcreation]

We don't talk about Enochian enough.

To my knowledge, enochian is a holy language spoken my angels and god. This means it's probably also spoken by Lucifer, whom canonically has contact with the other demons (azazel for example). It's wouldn't be a long shot for the demons in hell, or at least for hell's royal family to speak the language too. It would be like french in medieval England. Speaking enochian would be a status symbol. A symbol of wealth, class, intellect and hierarchy. Especially since it's so notoriously hard to learn. But because the language only comes through one source and Lucifer isn't exactly giving seminars on the language, it would be safe to assume that the language starts to change and evolve, as languages often do. The language would change quite a bit over the centuries and millennia that Lucifer is down there, making it a different dialect. Devilish, or Hellish enochian.

The enochian used by angels/god would still be named just enochian, heavenly enochian, or the Lords enochian. Now here's where the Winchesters come in. Because they are the true vessels for Lucifer and Michael respectively, it is probably safe to assume they pick the language up faster then any other mortals ever could.

Still, Dean, even though he spends all his time with Cas practically in his ass, still struggles with the language. It is difficult to pronounce, remember and string together words. Not only that, but there are words and concepts in the language that there are no words for in english or any other human language.

The world and existence as a whole is so different for humans then it is for angels, it's almost impossible to completely get a grasp for the language if you only have a few decades of life in your lifespan. It would literally take you more then an average human lifespan to learn the language, in the same way it takes babies several years to learn their first language. So yeah, Dean struggles. Sam on the other hand, spend more then one human lifespan in hell, and came back speaking hellish enochian perfectly. He barely even had an accent. As a matter of fact, his english had a slightly different lisp to it that wasn't there before and Sam occasionally makes weird grammatical errors in his sentences. He doesn't consciously remember the cage, because of the barrier in his brain, but his soul remembers the language well enough. The reason Sam doesn't get triggered into a panic attack when he hears the language of his captor coming from Cas for the first time is because the accent, feel and intonation is so diffrent from the hellish enochian Lucifer talked to him in.

Jack is fluent in both hellish and heavenly enochian. Cas speaks heavenly enochian and Sam speaks devilish enochian. Dean is just confused

[tryin2writehere]

Gentlemen Fanfic (Eddie x Susie)

PEOPLE IN GLASS HOUSES

1

Susie Glass’s layers rivaled an onion, but with hardened surfaces like the earth’s own fucking mantle. A polished design of layered wools, tweed, velvets and silks, as though they could literally armor her against a consistent onslaught of fatuity-prone workmates. Eddie spent long moments dealing devilish ideas of unfurling her from these layers. He often soothed himself with the notion that a personal union could be possible without imploding their professional partnership.

 

He found himself seeking signs like a meteorologist to predict her temperature, (cooly aloof with a sixty percent chance of snark.) When she warmed, and her eyes revealed a playful gleam, it could set him on the edge of reason.

Like he called her forth with desire alone, the outline of her body emanated on the decorative glass frame of his study. Before she was even fully in the room, he smiled, “Hello Susan.”

“Evening Edward,” she returned and sashayed across the room in a perfectly tailored blue plaid suit he’d never seen. She planted herself in a chair across from Eddie. 

The low light glinted off the amber bourbon Eddie poured into baccarat tumblers, “did you hear back from Brussels?”

“Our Belgian friends have a different timeline in mind and no sense of urgency. I reckon we’ll hear sometime next week.”

“Do you speak any Flemish?” The most successful way, he found, to get to know Susie Glass, was micro-information obtained in seemingly innocuous questions.  That and surviving nazi twat machine-gun fire.  

“Very little.  Mostly vulgarities, really.  I get by with French.  You?”

“Not a word,” he rounded his desk, sat on the edge, and handed her the drink, eyeing her on-business demeanor. 

She sipped, looking up at him through thick eyelashes and fringe, and his chest tightened slightly.

“Jack is doing well?”

Her countenance visibly lightened with her brother’s name, her azure eyes suddenly balmy, “he is indeed. Fortuitous you mentioning him.”

“How so?”

“I’ve a meeting tomorrow afternoon with an unpleasant but necessary gym owner. Thought you might like to join me.”

“I would like to join you, yes.  A gym owner?”

“I’m looking to acquire a few more locations.”

“For Jack?”

“He isn’t ready to train, and I need to keep him busy, keep his mind occupied while he’s recovering.  GlassKnuckle is a fine place, but his pride…he needs a bit of a fresh start. He’d be a good coach really,” she paused and smirked. “He’d be a shit awful manager, but I can outsource that to a degree. It’s the only environment I reckon will keep him contented until he can train again.”

Eddie nearly asked if fighting again was even a realistic possibility, but thought better of it.  He didn’t want to squash the hopeful glimmer in her eyes or again draw attention to his own culpability in Jack’s condition.

Instead he asked, “who is this unpleasant Gym Owner?”

“Sugar Walsh.  He owns three locations, and rumours abound he’s looking to unload them and retire.”

“What time tomorrow?”

“Two o’clock. You available then?”

“I’m not, unfortunately. I’m taking Chuckles and Junior to the doctor.”

“The doctor?” she leaned forward in concern.

“Just a scheduled check-up for the baby, but she asked me -“

“Of course,” she nodded, “you’re a good brother.”

“Mm. Yes, I try. Can we reschedule?”

“Had better not. As I said, he’s unpleasant as it is.”

She stared into her drink, her posture stiffening slightly, her body weighted again with some unknown problem-to-be-solved.

“Susie?”

She glanced up at him.

“Is there something -”

“- nothing I can’t handle,” she blinked softly.

“Of course,” he nodded again. “We should return around four pm tomorrow; would you like to have dinner with me, and we can discuss some overdue security upgrades?” 

“Dinner with the Duke of Halstead.  What shall I wear?”

“Something blue.  Compliments your eyes.”

“Hm. Blue it is.” She swallowed the last of her drink and was gone before he could conjure a chaste enough reason for her to stay.

[kluskinoodles]

TO THE SURFACE MASTER POST

Okay okay so the characters are as follows: Redemption Done Subpar: Main Characters: Yi Suchong, Brigid Tenenbaum, Jack Antagonists: Frank Fontaine, Reggie, Fontaine's Goons Background characters: Nurse Chavez, J.S. Steinman, a bunch of Rapture citizens Three's A Crowd: Main Characters: Gilbert Alexander, Eleanor Lamb Supporting Character: Augustus Sinclair Antagonist: Sofia Lamb Background/Side Characters: Stanley Poole, a bunch of Rapture's Citizens and Lamb's Followers, multiple Fontaine Futuristics' Employees Give Me Freedom Or Give Me Death: Main Characters: Kyle Fitzpatrick, Silas Cobb, Martin Finnegan, Hector Rodriguez Supporting Character: Anna Culpepper Antagonist: Sander Cohen Background/Side Characters: Jasmine Jolene, multiple of Fort Frolic performers Note: Characters and locations may change, still working out the kinks

More random headcanons that don't matter but kinda do: -Sinclair legally adopted Jack, Eleanor, and Kyle for tax write offs -Kyle was homeschooled, up until his father took him to Rapture -Down the hill there is this one neighbor that is super suspicious of Sinclair but not Jack who literally has glowing yellow eyes 😭 -Silas got arrested for resisting arrest with violence and assault, Sinclair bailed him out but now he has a court date 😕 -Alexander is super paranoid that his family will track him down like Silas' mother found Silas. He does NOT want to see them, any of them. They are part of the reason he went to Rapture in the first place. Sadly, his family has found his info and whereabouts, and are on their way, send Gil thoughts and prayers cause he's not gonna be mentally well. 😬 -Eleanor does arts and crafts with Martin, the things she creates are a little wonky but Martin keeps all of them on his trinket shelf -Hector taught Eleanor and Jack swears in spanish, he got yelled at by Sinclair -The house is a multi language house hold. The languages that are spoken are Spanish, Korean, German, French, English, and Italian I'LL THINK OF MORE LATER Anyways anyways, NEXT QUESTION "Do the children have nicknames for the adults?" Yes. Jack can't say most of their names but Suchong is Papa, Tenenbaum is Mama (she hates it but is warming up to it). Jack heard Sinclair call Gilbert, Guppy, once and he will NOT STOP CALLING GIL THAT. Like they've tried to get him to stop, albeit he can only say it like "Gubby" (he can't say his P's that well yet) but still. He does stop when he's older. Sinclair is Poppy Auggie or just Poppy. Eleanor is Ellie. Kyle is Ky and Ky-ky, Silas is Sy (pronounced Psy) , Martin is Mari (pronounced Mar-ee), and Hector is fucking Tío (he taught him to say it). Some of these nicknames change after he grows up. Eleanor after a while she started calling Gilbert dad, the first time she called him dad, he sobbed for an hour. Sinclair is Papa Augustus/August. Suchong and Tenenbaum are Uncle and Aunt. Jack is well Jack. And the other 4, she just calls them by their first names. When Silas' mom finds him, Jack calls her Gigi (pronounced Gee-Gee) and Eleanor calls her Grandma Cobb. I will add to this post if need be with reblogs but that's it for now. I am going to grab this au and throw it around like a ragdoll. Me currently vvvv

People-- @js-sexchange-surgeon-steinman @yuro-skell @arsont-t

[yuurei20]

Rook Info Compilation Part 1: Nicknames and Hunting

Rook Hunt is the vice-housewarden of Pomefiore and consistently refers to him self as 愛の狩人 / le chasseur d'amour / the hunter of love.

While both Floyd and Rook both have unique nicknames for everyone around them, Floyd never uses anyone’s real name at all (with the exception of Azul and Jade), while Rook will shift freely between first names and names of his own creation.

(On NA Vil is the exception to Floyd’s rule, but that may be less canon and more continuity issue)

Rook’s nicknames are not always the same on both servers. While Trey’s Chevalier des Roses and Leona’s Roi de Lions are the same, Jamil’s Monsieur Multi (NA: Monsieur Pyramide) and Jack’s Monsieur Tough Guy (NA: Monsieur Fier a-bras) are not. His name for the player is Trickster.

Rook's NA nickname for Ruggie is a trilingual pun: Ruggie is Monsieur Tanpopo on JP, which is Japanese for “dandelion”, as Rook once found him looking for dandelions to eat. On NA he is the French word “Dent-de-Lion”, which is also “dandelion” but also, literally means, “tooth of the lion”.

(Like Floyd, however, Rook’s nicknames are also met with the occasional continuity issue. He shifts from Dore to Doré (I have been told that d’or might actually be what it’s supposed to be) with Kalim, and from “Roi de l’Effort” to “Roi de Fort” with Azul (a French speaker once told me that it would “Roi du fort”, not “de fort”, but “de l’Effort” is both grammatically correct and probably what Rook is going for, since this is Azul.) Floyd refers to him as Seagull.

Rook is originally from Sunset Savannah, along with Ruggie and Leona. He has exceptionally good eyesight and hearing, which are referenced fairly often.

In a voice line he says, “I suggest you wear a hat. The glare makes it hard to see your prey”, which is perhaps part of the reason why he wears his own. In a chat Rook says he wears it because he considers "the huntsman who served the Fairest Queen of All" to be a "font of inspiration".

He has an excellent sense of smell and dislikes garlic for impeding his ability to hunt.

[nequittezpaswrites]

Will Turner Is Not Smart: Dead Man’s Chest Edition

It’s time to dive into the second Pirates film, in which Will Turner suffers the consequences of his own actions, yet stubbornly insists on repeating the same mistakes. Previous take on Will’s unhinged decision making in Curse of the Black Pearl is here.

Prologue: Rescuing Jack in the most dramatic way possible

This was #5 on the list of Will’s unhinged decisions in Curse of the Black Pearl, and it bears repeating here because it is the inciting incident for literally everything that comes next. Will and Elizabeth would not have been dragged into the nonsense with Davy Jones or anything else that happens in the second and third movies had they not publicly saved Jack Sparrow in front dozens, if not hundreds, of witnesses.

Clownery the First: The ‘deal’ with Beckett

After Will and Elizabeth are arrested, Beckett has Will brought to his office, where he tells Will the following things: 1) The East India Trading Company wants him to recover Jack Sparrow’s compass. 2) In return for the compass, Jack is to receive letters of marque, meaning a full pardon and employment as a privateer for England.

Beckett also mentions in this conversation that Will and Elizabeth “face the hangman’s noose,” but notably he never states outright that he intends to free or pardon Will or Elizabeth. He tells Will to “Bring back that compass or there’s no deal.” But what exactly is the deal? It is implied that Will and Elizabeth can go free, but Beckett never explicitly says it. This is the sort of deal you want in writing, Will. And if not, then at the very least stated aloud, and preferably in the presence of witnesses.

Will got a pass on the clumsy wording of his bargain with Barbossa in the last movie, but apparently he learned nothing from the way that backfired. There is absolutely no excuse for his lack of due diligence here. Clownery.

Clownery the Second: Serving himself up on a plate

I hate the whole sequence on the cannibal island, so I won’t go too far into it, but if someone tells you that they eat “long pork,” run hard in the other direction. The guy who takes Will there won’t even get close to shore, and even if you don’t speak French, the word “dangereux” is pretty self-explanatory. And then, when Will runs into Cotton’s parrot, who says “Don’t eat me!”, he moronically assures the parrot that he’s not going to eat it. Have you forgotten how parrots work, Will? They repeat phrases they have heard humans say. Clownery.

Clownery the Third: Playing Jack’s puppet

In the last movie, Will didn’t trust Jack enough and knocked him out with an oar for… some reason. In this movie, by contrast, you can do anything to Will Turner. He’s shiny and dumb and easy to trick.

First of all, when Will tells Jack that they need to return to Port Royal and trade the compass for Elizabeth’s freedom, he fails to specify: 1) to whom the compass is being traded, and 2) what’s in it for Jack. He literally doesn’t even mention the letters of marque. And sure, maybe Jack wouldn’t want them, but Will doesn’t know that for sure.

So instead, Jack names his own price: Will must help him find the key. Will displays a stunning lack of curiosity in this conversation, asking almost no questions, and what questions he does ask are the wrong ones. Observe:

Will: This is going to save Elizabeth? Jack: [hesitating, looking visibly worried; when he speaks, his voice is low, pitched so the rest of the crew can’t hear] How much do you know about Davy Jones? Will: [oblivious] Not much. Jack: Yeah, it’s going to save Elizabeth.

Will asks zero follow-up questions about this, or about Jack’s straightforwardly suspicious behavior. Later, he asks Gibbs why Jack is afraid of open water and receives some exposition about the kraken, but some questions a reasonable person might ask Jack in this situation are: What is this key? Why do you want it? What does Davy Jones have to do with it?

The conversation with Tia Dalma reveals this information, and Will gets a pass on agreeing to fetch the key from the Dutchman. It’s a stupid plan, but charging in thoughtlessly is basically Will’s specialty, and he’s desperate to save Elizabeth.

He does not get a pass on telling Davy Jones that he’s there to settle Jack’s debt, though. Will, for God’s sake—when Jack says that if you get caught you should say “Jack Sparrow sent you to settle his debt”, your immediate response should be, “Hold on, what debt?” Do not just thoughtlessly repeat what Jack tells you! You have no idea what you’re agreeing to! Clownery.

Clownery the Fourth: Fighting with Jack and Norrington

Will manages to be decently clever about stealing the key from Jones and escaping the Dutchman. Well done, Will.

On Isla Cruces, where Jack, Elizabeth, and Norrington have unearthed the chest, Will drops to his knees and prepares to stab the heart right then and there, so as to save his father. He doesn’t yet know that this is a bad idea, as it has only been alluded to at this point that whoever kills Jones must take his place. Jack stops him, because he needs the heart for Jones to call off the kraken, and Norrington also wants the heart, in order to give it to Beckett. All three begin fighting over the key.

The thing is, Jack and Will’s objectives are not actually opposed to each other. Will promised to free his father by killing Jones, but he could just as easily free him by bargaining, like Jack intends to do. Will and Jack could unite against Norrington, take the heart, and make their deals. Both of them could get what they want. Instead, Norrington runs off with it and both of them lose.

(Also, though Will doesn’t seem to realize it, he has good reasons not to kill Jones. If he does, he will be destroying the bargaining chip which was supposed to see him and Elizabeth freed. True, they’re both out of jail now, but they’re both outlaws unless they can be pardoned, and killing Jones would essentially make that impossible.)

Clownery.

Clownery the Fifth: Believing the Pearl can beat the Dutchman

When they’re running from the Dutchman, Will tells Jack, “My father is on that ship. If we can outrun her, we can take her. We should turn and fight.”

First of all, no. Being able to outrun a ship does not equal being able to take that ship in a fight. Those things are not the same, Will.

They are especially not the same when we are talking about a ghost ship crewed by a supernatural entity. You’ve seen Jones freaking teleport. You know by this point his crew can’t be killed. You’ve seen the Dutchman dive beneath the waves. Why on earth would you think that you could win a fight against her? You can’t beat Jones with brute force any more than you could beat Barbossa that way—did you learn nothing from the last film?

The worst part is that Will persists in this mad conviction for a very long time. At the end of the movie, he’s not sad about losing Jack—he’s angry that the Pearl is gone, because for some reason he’s decided that he needs it to free his father.

Why would that be the case, Will? Catching the Dutchman has never been the problem. You got onto it in the first place by climbing aboard a doomed ship. And even if you did catch up to it, or get on board it, you wouldn’t be able to do anything to help your father, because you don’t have the heart!

But for some reason, Will has decided that he needs the Pearl to save his father, and this delusion is the driving force behind essentially all of his ridiculous choices in the movie that follows. Clownery.

[sophieswundergarten]

Alright I know I made a whole impassioned speech about the gorgeous symbolism in Milligan's name and everything last night.

But.

Mr. Stewart. Sir. My good man. Author of one of my favorite series of all time and all around creative genius. As much as I absolutely adore your books.

What was going through your head with your naming system???

Some of them make complete and total sense, and some of them are just odd in the most weirdly intriguing way? I respect the decision on all of them because they fit the characters amazingly (for the most part), but, on occasion??

Therefore, I am going to rank all of the names from the main people in no particular order, according to my own research and slightly goofy reasoning.

S. Q. Pedalian - Exquisite character. But his name is a pun?? And it's an ironic pun, because "sesquipedalian" means to have a lot of syllables or use long words, which S. Q. continually struggles with!!!

7/10 Sad, and a little bit funny, but all in all clever and a really unique name for a sweet boy. Very calm and soft colors and connected to a very curly and gangly word that fits him quite well. I think he would really like using the word that is his namesake, whether he knows it or not.

Constance Contraire - "Constance" is, of course, a name meaning "constant" or "steadfast". "Contraire" is just an actual French word that means "opposite", which is an amazing summarization of her personality.

10/10 Hysterical and one hundred percent accurate, and it is alliterative! Very poetic. The "ire" at the end feels very defiant and Constance-y, not to mention that "Ire" as a word means "anger".

George "Sticky" Washington - "George" means "farmer" or "someone who works the earth", while "Washington" likely means "home of the Wassa people", and can be attributed to a place in England. Now, the very obvious connection is to George Washington the historical figure, who is likely someone Sticky looks up to, and also had a lot of pressure on him, there is something to be said about the metaphorical meanings of "home" and "settling" in conjunction with "farmer" (someone who works hard to grow).

8/10 Not as much fun in the meaning, but still a solid and green/blue cool colored name. It feels like a particularly friendly frog with sticky frog skin.

Kate Wetherall - "Kate" is short for "Katherine", which means "pure" ("Caitlin" is also a form of "Katherine"). I've talked about "Wetherall" being a play on "Weather all", but it is just so spectacular I had to go over it again. There are not a lot of credible sources, and while one mentioned that it might mean "place where wether sheep are kept" (wethers are male castrated sheep), I am much more inclined to think that it is made up, as it makes more sense.

7/10 Still love the way it communicates her independence and how hard she works, and the "pure" part is a nice association to her and Milligan's relationship with water (and the both of them being strong swimmers). Her last name also feels very windmill-y and helter-skelter energetic, like her.

Reynard Muldoon - "Reynard" is from a Germanic name meaning "strong in council", which is beautiful and poetic and just the best name for the one who tends to guide the group and continually falls back on them for reassurance. "Muldoon" is just one of those old Gaelic kind of names that means "descendant of whoever".

9/10 Lovely hidden meaning, and even more so when you consider that the only person to purposefully continue calling him that is Curtain. Really soothing colors, warm browns and more reddy colors, soft like a sweater.

Jackson & Jillson - I don't know their last names, so they get put together. First off, "son" as a name suffix literally means "son of". Some people say "Jack" is a form of "John", meaning "God is gracious", but there are one or two other theories. "Jillson" is a name of dubious realness, as I can't find a lot about it. Some sources (very, very few) say it might mean "Son of Juliana/Gills", but it is highly unclear. "Jill" by itself means "youthful", so the "son" suffix doesn't make much sense there either.

10/10 Even though they don't really make any sense, the "Jack and Jill" theme is evident and they both feel suitably pointy to be executives. Wonderfully silly and yet sharing the facade of trying to be Serious and Official.

Martina Crowe - "Martina" is a name derived from Mars, the Roman god of war, and "Crowe" is to do with the bird, and can be used for someone with black hair. It is also possible that "Crowe" means "hound of destruction", but either way it works with her aggressive and competitive spirit.

10/10 Perfectly fits her, black hair, need to dominate and all. It is a sophisticated sounding name, and comes across as authoritative. It is also prickly, and you can feel the prioritization of winning over social graces.

Milligan - Not really a name, but has the inherent meaning of his promise to take Kate to the "mill again" and is therefore a great name full of the most heartbreaking and incredible symbolism.

∞/10 I can't describe how well this name works in every conceivable way.

Number Two/Pencilla - Despite both of them being hints at her pencil-like appearance, I really like all of the love you can see in "Number Two". Her decision to go by her code name is initially out of her dislike of her legal name, but it is also a reference to her being Mr. Benedict's second in command (and possibly to the fact that she was the second person to join his organization, depending on when Milligan arrived).

10/10 A terrific way to show her commitment to her work, and, in a similar way to Milligan, how her name changes to be what those who love her call her.

Rhonda Kazembe - "Rhonda" can either mean "good spear" or "noisy", depending on who you believe. "Kazembe" is the name of a traditional kingdom in Zambia, from what I could find. This has very little to do with her personality, but it sounds really pretty and is distracting, which I think may have been the point. Similar to her appearance when she was initially introduced to the kids, her name is unusual and draws attention to her (which is why I included "noisy" as a meaning), and it aids in her misdirection.

8/10 Not a lot of symbolic meaning, but I very much love how it sounds, her first name is full of nice round sounds and warm smiles, and her last name reminds me of the fun patterns on her clothes.

Dipika Perumal - "Dipika" means "light", and "Perumal" means "great one". While "Perumal" 's meaning is in reference to a version of the Hindu god Vishnu, in a literal sense it is quite accurate. Miss Perumal is a great light in Reynie's life, and in the lives of the others she meets. She is a guide and a kind but truthful source of advice.

9/10 It sounds like tea being poured into a cup. A lovely name that describes her in an intimately accurate way, as well as her surname being in Tamil.

Nicholas Benedict - "Nicholas" means "victory of the people", and "Benedict" means "the blessed one", both of which are in line with his personality. He is fighting for the people of the world, and while he may not consider himself blessed, he is certainly a blessing and a benevolent figure to others.

9/10 Extremely comforting name, fits him and his intentions amazingly. It has just the right amount of whimsy while still being grounding and secure.

Nathaniel Benedict/Ledroptha Curtain - "Nathaniel" means "gift of God", and with the surname "Benedict", it is easy to see how this applies to him. He definitely believes that he is a blessing, God's gift to the world. "Ledroptha Curtain" is a whole other story. Either it seems to be his real, actual name and some crazy people named him that, or maybe he made it his legal name (the books), or he definitely made it his name, for some weird reason (the show).

5/10 I'm really pleased with whoever made the decision to make his name "Nathaniel" for the show, but I just can't condone the stupid pun that he never uses!! What was he going to use it for?? He basically never interacts with a curtain, especially because his master plan isn't really physical!!

We're including Garrison and Crawlings because I feel like they're sort of each other's counterparts? Seeing as one is show-only and the other is book-only.

Dr. Garrison - "Garrison" can be both a name and a real word, and both mean "fortress" or "stronghold". And while Garrison may be considered a stronghold of secrets, she also hides herself in many strongholds, first on the island and then in the rootcellar.

7/10 Very thematic, but I wish we had learned her first name. I feel like it could have been just a little more creative and well-fitting.

Crawlings - That's just his name. There isn't really a way to find meaning in it, especially as it's only one word. I suppose it conveys a creeping, spooky, unsettling feeling, but he just sounds odd.

?/10 I don't really know what to do with him.

And, lastly, because I felt bad for leaving him out:

Jeffers - It means "Son of Jeffery", which, in turn, means "peace" or "God's pledge". Now, this does not really refer to his personality, because he is never at peace, poor man. It may refer to his goal to keep the peace, sort of?

7/10 Just a good goon name.

[rowanmuppet]

To go with the penny and mischa headcanons could you do some for noel? I love your other ones smmm

Absolutely I can noel is literally my number one fav and he is rotating around my brain at all times like a microwave

- as a kid he ABSOLUTELY wore his mother's high heels/fancy dresses and had a little tea party on a regular basis with all his stuffed animals bc DUH. He would force his mom to participate but she loved it

- she would paint his nails as often as he asked her to and in whatever color he picked. She'd have a giant collection of colors/glitter/etc and some of his earliest/favorite memories would be of him sitting on her bed getting his nails done and watching reality tv or a devastating french film he's DEFINITELY too young to be seeing

- he is also a giant theater kid and is only in the choir because he was banned from being in the school's plays after the waiting for godot incident

- everyone loves "nischa where Mischa is oblivious to Noel's flirting" but in my heart and soul it's the other way around

- bro is clueless fr Mischa could literally walk up to him and say "I am in love with you noel gruber and I want to marry you" and he'd be like ha imagine. Obviously you'd never mean that though

- was definitely given makeup from his mother for a birthday or something and it's all subtle enough that he can wear it places without people REALLY noticing but he knows it's there (it's like, clear mascara and tinted chapstick but he definitely cried when he opened it)

- side note he definitely has one of the nicest moms out of everyone in the choir??? People hc that she's an alcoholic for some reason and it's like. Nah she's his number one biggest fan fr !!!! We would know if she was 💀

- she doesn't KNOW about Monique per se but she's definitely seen the outfit in his laundry and just never brought it up

- because I know for a fact he's had it in his closet for YEARS and wore it for funsies when he knew nobody was home. Definitely has the entire choreography of cell block tango PERFECTED

- even before he worked at taco bell he high key hated it and that was just amplified with all the shit he had to deal with at that job

- everyone else in the choir literally loves it and it annoys him to no end

- half of his texts with ocean are "hello!! How is my favorite member of the choir today 😄😄" "what do you want ocean" "Baja blast please" "okay."

- he loves ocean like a sibling your honor. They're literally mlm wlw hostility but in a best friends way

- ESPECIALLY AS KIDS when they were kids they were just best friends it was him ocean and constance. But then she beat him at duck duck goose and their relationship was never the same (this is canon to me)

- my favorite thing is making them all best friends with Constance even before the accident because of course they were

- she was the nicest girl in town!! I know her yearbook was signed with a bunch of meaningless "I never met you but you seemed nice" crap

- but my personal theory is that noel, ocean and constance were a lil trio in elementary school and then ocean and noel became mortal enemies (/hj) so they grew apart

- and that's why they're allowed to bully each other relentlessly bc they're basically siblings at this point

- titanic was one of his fav movies before he discovered french new wave cinema but he didn't cry much when he watched it (and if he did, it's because he was wishing a stranger he met on a cruise in the 20s would die for him the way jack did for rose)

[I don't know why I have titanic headcanons for basically every member of the choir I don't even like it THAT much???]

- also he insists there was no room for Jack on the door (he's right)

- he has a black cat named Lola. There isn't much to this hc but I just think it's objectively true.

- On the rare occasion the choir would hang out before the accident and the rarer occasion it was at Noel's house, Ricky would ignore everyone completely and make a beeline to the cat

- the first time Ricky came over he said "you have a cat, don't you?" And noel just kinda looked at him like ???? Before eventually saying "yes... But how did you know that?"

- he loves rain and thunderstorms from the comfort of his home but will literally not be caught DEAD stepping foot outside in it without an umbrella + rain boots + jacket because he doesn't want his clothes to get wet. And he's real for this

- speaking of noel and being dead (I am a god of segues), before he left for school the day of the accident he said these exact words to his mom: "farewell mother. I'm off to die in a tragic accident, don't wait up for me, for I will not return to you in this lifetime"

- this would have been a common way for him to say goodbye to her, and she would always roll her eyes and say "oh how will I go on without you! Surely the grief would be too much for me to bear! I shall stay up at night, clutching an article of your clothing as a single limpid tear rolls down my cheek" And then laugh and tell him to be safe

- and then he actually dies in a tragic accident

- oops #rip

- I don't know why, but imagining Noel's mother after the accident always made me so much sadder than the rest of the choir 😭 I just imagine that they were super duper close for basically his whole life

- also, despite yearning for this whole tragic life I feel like he's super squeamish?? He cannot stand the sight of blood or vomit

- maybe in his fantasy part of that is he can actually handle the things that end up happening in the movies he likes

- also I refuse to believe that their favorite rides aren't somewhat related to something that happened the day of the fair itself

- what I'm saying is basically he rode the ferris wheel with Mischa and almost lost his god damn mind

- it would have been so romantic if he knew his crush was probably mutual

- and finally. Nischa holding onto each other for dear life when things started going wrong and having to be pulled apart post mortem

Thank you for your time this is literally so long and I could come up with so many more

[chicmntndie]

My headcanons

I said I liked other dorms too and this is me trying to prove it

literally just the basics like where I think they’re from in our world equivalent and gender/sexuality type stuff unless I get inspired

also yay I finally worked out formatting

Heartslaybul:

Riddle: either a trans man or a trans woman I don’t make the rules. I feel like Riddle wouldn’t care much about gender so long as he loved someone but doesn’t know how labels work (sheltered childhood does that to you) definitely British. Ace: Either cis and supportive but will tease you or somewhere nonbinary and masc leaning. I headcanon him as biromantic (no preference) and Demi or grey sexual He’s Latinx but like specifically from Spain Deuce: Genderfluid. But is way too nice to correct anyone. Bisexual with a slight male preference (he likes big muscles) Latinx as well but specifically from Mexico Him and Ace 1000% argue in Spanish in front of their dorm to pretty much everyone’s confusion. It’s heightened by the fact that Ace is using Spain Spanish and Deuce is using Mexican Spanish Trey: Trans male in my brain but really he’s a token cis. Very supportive, though. Doesn’t really care what pronouns you use on him. Sometimes him and Cater will test pronouns for Cater by using them for each other so Cater doesn’t feel alone or like a burden for wanting “weird” pronouns. Identifies as bisexual. For some reason my brain sees Trey one of two ways- as pasty as canon and British like Riddle or black and German Cater: they/them nonbinary. They want to distance themself from the feminine cute but also don’t want to be a macho masculine man so when they discovered the label nonbinary they were beyond delighted. Online they probably go by neos but with schoolmates they are generally referred to be he/him and are too scared to correct anyone. I see Cater as French. Why? I don’t know.

Savanaclaw:

Leona: Cis man but also doesn’t care what pronouns you use. Identifies as gay but if he fell for a woman he would just kinda shrug and change it. Somewhere on the ace spectrum as well but is too lazy to find a name for it. can you tell I’m asexual from this- From around Namibia Ruggie: trans man. If asked what his sexuality is he would say something along the lines of “I’m attracted to a comfortable life and good food” He’s really demisexual. South African Jack: Gonna be upfront, Jack is my least favorite character so I don’t have much to say. This is a cis Good Boy who loves his partners (the first years) very much. Polyamorous and pansexual. From Russia’s area it’s 3 am I can’t remember the name of that area but that

Octavinelle:

Gonna preface this one by saying that since under the ocean gender, sexuality, and number of partners don’t matter much, the whole of Octavinelle don’t care much. In fact, when Floyd first heard about gender he asked if it was edible. If they absolutely had to put a label, this is what they’d go with in my mind Azul: Genderfluid but defaults to she/her. Pansexual and polyamorous. Italian/Spanish I mean look at his name Jade: Trans female. Bisexual with a female preference and polyamorous. Italian Floyd: Refuses to label himself at all for gender because he thinks it’s utterly stupid but goes by he/him. Can’t see a difference between platonic and romantic relationships so he just sort of. Loves everyone? He calls it romantic because what do you mean humans don’t just kiss each other for love? And snuggle? Only one person? Preposterous. Literally doesn’t understand that some people aren’t polyamorous and keeps flirting with everyone, much to the horror of Riddle and Ace when Riddle caught Floyd kissing Ace on the cheek while Riddle was dating Floyd. Floyd explained it and Riddle was a bit confused at first but realized he was also polyamorous upon looking into it. They are both dating Ace now. oh he’s also Italian.

Scarabia:

Kalim: trans female to the horror of her parents. She accidentally came out at a huge family gathering. Bisexual with a heavy female preference. Also has a very hard time distinguishing between platonic and romantic attraction so she just sort of treats everyone like a lover. Jamil is suffering. Jamil: Another definitely trans but I can’t say which. Bisexual and traumatized away from relationships. Also on the ace spectrum and probably the aro spectrum, though he’s not sure.

Pomefiore:

Vil: trans fem but goes by she/he. Really doesn’t like they because she feels it’s dehumanizing. A lesbian. Polyamorous but only in closed circles. German obviously, again look at the name Rook: also trans fem but is just she/her. Also like Kalim and Floyd has a hard time distinguishing and acts like how she is- a little in love with everyone. Though she’s not always the best about flirting and loves Vil and Epel just a bit more than the rest From Northern Africa Epel: yes I know it’s somewhat against canon but I headcanon Epel as nonbinary she/he in order of preference. Okay okay, hear me out. While Epel is super sick of just being seen as feminine and wants to be seen as masculine, seeing Vil makes her realize that being feminine doesn’t have to mean she’s weak and in fact can make her stronger. With that, he realizes he doesn’t have to reject femininity but also doesn’t have to be hyper masculine so people won’t just see him as a girl. Vil calling him a pretty boy AND a pretty may have also had a hand in it /j Norwegian

Ignihyde:

oh my god Ignihyde I have way to many headcanons for them keep it simple yes post crazy amount of headcanons later be warned I have feelings about Ortho Idia: Yet another character I can’t decide if I see as trans male or trans female but he’s one of these (though I tend to go for trans male) He is very bisexual with a female preference. He doesn’t mean to seem creepy in front of people, but he’s too shy to talk to anyone so when he does he comes off as a creep because he’ll shout something like “YOUR CHEST LOOKS GOOD IN THAT!” And run away. He meant it as a compliment but nope most people won’t see it that way Greek Idia is my passion. I will not be taking arguments. He definitely swears in an older form of Greek that STYX uses while gaming so people can’t get mad at him because there’s no way they know it. One time Lilia responded and oh boy panic lead to a deeper friendship OG Ortho: knew he was trans from a very young age, this carried over to the AI and later the combined Ortho soul thingy (post ch 6 ortho) POST CHAPTER 6 Ortho: asexual spectrum and unlabeled romantically. Definitely got a bit of a crush on Vil, though whether that’s aesthetic, romantic, or sexual, Ortho doesn’t know. Greek as well, duh

Diasomnia:

same drill as octavinelle Malleus: A literal dragon. Doesn’t care what you call him so long as you call him. Also doesn’t understand that oh my god Malleus you can’t just kiss (insert partner) on the cheek in plain daylight. Irish Lilia: Genderfluid and uses this to prank people. Has been with every gender and loves all equally Originally from the German area, but moved around a lot to the center of Briar Valley and now lives in Ireland Silver: Goes by he/him for others convince but when Kalim came out and started crying on him in fear after that dinner he immediately switched to she around Kalim and Jamil in support of Kalim. Views love the same way as Kalim, loving a bit of everyone. Born in Serbia but now lives with Lilia and Malleus in the equivalent of Ireland Sebek: cis male but doesn’t mind any pronouns. Polyamorous and unlabeled Half German half Irish

enjoy my sleep deprived fueled bullshit and have a nice morning/day/evening

[bracketsoffear]

Batter propaganda:

His main goal is to purify the world, which involves destroying it. However, he doesn't quite get to that point until later in the game. Early on, he is genuinely outraged at Dedan's cruelty and sets out to selflessly help several Elsens on the way. After seeing the awful status of the world and how awful the guardians are, his resolve in his mission sets, whatever empathy he has left erodes away, and his zeal becomes unshakeable.

The world of OFF relies on meat and smoke: without smoke, everyone will suffocate, and without meat, everyone will starve and/or eat each other ("Ils se devoraient"). Both of these elements are produced in Zone 1 and exported to the other Zones. Zone 1 is the first Zone to be purified, which means no more smoke or meat, so everyone is totally fucked already--but he doesn't even stop there, continuing on his mission of purification.

And what are "purified" Zones like? The world has gone completely white, every NPC is gone, signs and papers everywhere are completely blanked out, and the track is ominous music filled with whispering and sometimes the noise of someone slamming their fists frantically accompanied by muffled cries (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0K_xO8JltXc). While most of the whispersnote  are unintelligible, some of them sound like "What have they done to deserve this?" and "Why did you kill them?" You can occasionally hear someone cry, "Au secours!" which is French for "Help!"

Above: Zone 1, pre-purification.

Above: Zone 1, post-purification.

The enemies are replaced with demonic dolls called Secretaries:

Mortis Ghost (the game's creator) has stated that they are the reason as to why the Purified Zones are so desolate and empty, as they killed all of its inhabitants. These things are an improvement in the Batter's eyes.

In the purified Zone 2, a single, solitary Elsen resides in the corner of an out of the way house. He's the only living thing left in all the purified zones. When you talk to him, all he says is: "The specters are gone... The color is gone... Everything is gone... I'm finally safe..." But the name for the purified zone music is "Not Safe."

After purifying the Zones, the Batter faces off with The Queen:

He defeats her and goes on to confront Hugo--a literal infant:

You can guess how that goes.

After the..."battle"...here's the last exchange between Hugo and The Batter:

It seems The Batter justifies his actions as "saving" the world--he eradicates the darkness of a broken world where two of the Zones are ruled by despots, one Zone's inhabitants have become too afraid of everything to enjoy life, another's are hopelessly addicted to a drug made from the ashes of the dead (which is being exported to the other Zones, meaning they're on track to meeting the same fate), the whole place is infested with murderous ghosts, and the ruler seems totally disinterested in doing jack about any of this. His response to the catastrophic downward spiral of a world terminally dependent on industry and drugs is to cause even more terrible change by destroying it all--something that ought to sound familiar to Gaius fans.

This is furthered by the final showdown between The Batter and The Judge:

"Karin" is the name of the player in the video I'm getting these from. The Judge aided The Batter before, but now regrets his complicity in The Batter's crimes and seeks to prevent the apocalypse he has brought upon his own world. He calls upon the player to help him stop the destruction they've caused by guiding The Batter throughout the game.

If the player sides with The Batter, then...it's over. The Batter wins.

It's the end of everything. And it was always meant to be.

And even if the player sides with The Judge, it's already too late.

Sure, you can defeat The Batter...

But the world has already been destroyed beyond repair. Yet The Judge prefers letting this purified hellscape persist over allowing The Batter to turn the world OFF:

This is all that's left by the end is white nothingness. No matter what you do at this point, The Batter brought The Extinction.

Also, Hugo's death is implied to be extra tragic for several reasons. The world that we explore in OFF is utterly artificial. Liquid water has been replaced by plastic and the land is all metal. The Elsens themselves are implied to be artificial as well, unable to reproduce and seemingly just there to mold the world back into something resembling what it once was. Hugo represents the first hope that humanity in some form will survive the calamity that took place before the beginning of the game, as he seems to have been naturally born to his absent original parents. He and the Guardians of the Zones vowed to create a better world...

And Hugo even created parents for himself in the form of The Queen and The Batter...

And then his own son/father ended everything all over again.

.

[crossover-enthusiast]

Jack and Streber brother headcannons??? Perhaps???

Hehehe-

You know the drill, stuff under the cut

- The difference in age between them is probably about 7-10 years? Their parents weren't expecting another kid after Jack, but they adore Streber all the same - This technically isn't a brother headcanon but before I adopted it I headcanoned that Jack's last name is Flic, the French word for cop. I don't want to change it so that's Streber's last name now too lol - These two were inseparable when they were little, they did everything together! - They are both autistic (and undiagnosed) bc I said so - In their old hometown Jack and Streber were bullied for being the "weird kids". Jack protected Streber a lot and this caused the two to rely on each other even more - Their family moved to the spookytown when Jack was a teenager, and the town is so messed up nobody cared if they were a little weird sometimes so it was v good for them both - They are absolutely the reason boxes and plastic totes have the "don't put small children in this" warning - They are German and also bilingual! Jack has surprised many a person by suddenly speaking German - They are probably also the type of people to come up with a made up sibling language so when they were kids they just constantly swapped between English, German, and their own language and no one had any idea what they were saying - Streber shares Jack's fear of clowns lol, please save them - When Streber was in theater club in HS Jack tried to attend every show Strebs was an actor in, and in general Jack is just super supportive of him - When Streber came back to town after his failed stint as an actor Jack took him out for dinner to catch up. It was nice :> - They are such bad enablers to each other oh my god - If Jack has a day off when Streber's doing his haunted house, sometimes he'll come over and help out, usually as a scarer - Huge fans of dark humor. Sometimes use it to cope - Jack gets Brother Privilege discounts at Go Nuts For Donuts - A funny series of miscommunications led to Jack having no idea the candy kid was Streber's boyfriend, and Kevin having no idea one of the cops he insulted was Streber's brother -- Jack knew Streber was dating someone, and Kevin knew he had a brother, they just didn't know who. The eventual meetup was very awkward lol - If Kevin ever actually did patch things up with John and Jack, John and Kevin would take one look at Jack and Streber goofing around and go "yeah that explains a lot"

And because you're probably expecting it, angsty post-Tender Treats headcanons >:>

- Jack left his phone at home (he forgets to grab it sometimes), so he found out about Streber literally right as they were leaving the hospital after getting the amulet from Patty, still arguing about Jack's prank, because a nurse caring for Streber saw them - Whatever anger John had in the moment completely dissipates as he watches Jack's face just drop - He then had to go collect Jack as he just ran off for Streber without actually getting what room he was in from the nurse - They're only allowed to visit Streber for a little bit since he's in the ICU (and unconscious, so they couldn't talk anyways), but Jack hangs around outside his room for a good while before John finally manages to pull him away to go home - Jack is silent for the rest of the night and most of the next day just. Thinking. It's almost unnerving, how hollow he seems - So you know that bit in my John and Jack headcanons where after the fire John spirals because he couldn't stop thinking about what could have happened? That's kinda what Jack's going through here. He keeps replaying Evermore chewing them out, Patty "congratulating" them on letting eight people get killed, because they're right. If they had focused on Bob and dealt with him sooner, nine people would still be alive, Streber wouldn't be down an arm and on death's door, and it's all their fault, his fault his fault his fault- - This is one of those rare times where John comforts Jack and whoo boy he's still really bad at it, but he's trying. Compared to Jack's reassurance, John's methods are more to ground, keep him from getting stuck in his head over it, y'know? - One of the only brightsides of this whole thing is that Kevin and Jack actually managed to bond because of it, a little bit. They keep coming to see Streber at the same time bc of how their shifts line up, and even if he's asleep Kevin just sits next to Streber's bedside to be with him. Makes Jack realize just how much Kevin cares for his little brother, and maybe that he isn't such a bad guy after all - After Streber gets out of the hospital Jack is SO PROTECTIVE OF HIM. John honestly can't fault him for it since he was the same way with his kid after the fire (and still is lol) - If you so much as look at Streber wrong when both Jack and Kevin are in view you will feel a sudden inescapable wave of dread wash over you

- Streber doesn't blame Jack at all for what happened, he couldn't have known what Bob was going to do (and tbh hearing what Jack did to him made him feel a little better about the whole thing) - One of the first things Streber saw when he woke up was Jack looming over him and while it's funny in hindsight he screamed so loud - After that, though, there was a hug. A hug where two grown men fucking bawled - Streber passed out shortly after Bob walked off the porch, and the only things he could feel were pain, fear, and a tiny bit of hurt from Skid and Pump thinking he was just some prop -- seeing that he's still alive, with someone that actually cares, just makes him lose it. Jack meanwhile is a mix of relief and guilt, seeing Streber awake after days on end pops the cork on the bottle of emotions he'd been holding back - Streber really appreciated Jack and Kevin being there as often as they were. Being in a small hospital room all by himself just made him feel cramped and antsy - Streber both loves and hates how protective Jack's gotten of him, because on one hand it reminds him of when they were kids and it's nice to think of that during a time like this, but on the other he feels babied when Jack tries to help him with every little thing and he does not need that - Though on a lighter note to the above, it kinda is just like they're kids again -- the night Streber got out of the hospital they had a big horror movie marathon for the first time in ages, and it was fun! - Streber also kinda sorta takes advantage of the whole thing to make Jack and Kevin finally bury the hatchet and get along. He's tired of his boyfriend being scared of his brother >:{ - If that does happen, Streber eventually convinces them and John to go on a double date. Kevin is mildly stressed and John acts like he hates it, but by the end of the night they're all having a nice time - Jack chips in when he can to help Streber get a prosthetic. None of them have insurance lol

There you go :> 🍩🦇

Jack's part of the post-TT hcs was kinda just ranting about a fic idea I had, hah, hope you don't mind

[compte-jaques]

I read evrey post on this account tonight... why- did I post literally anything that I did ever? Like wtf was I doing?

Illegal activities, drugs, alcohol, sexual implications, feeding on lust, sins, masturbating, blasphemy, wanting to be a priest, God complex, desperation, and vampires/vampyrs.

Like that is the main description of my account. Which I've had since I was 13/14 :( I almost wanna start over and forget about this monstrosity of an acc.

I've always hated this acc with a deep passion, but I do believe it is about time I start over.

I am hardly even "compte Jaques" anymore aswell, I don't even really speak French on a regular basis anymore.

Like I am not Jack, ya' know like I've changed.

I honestly tried so fucking hard to stick to old habits but due to unforseen circumstances everything is diffrent now. Things are real, ya' know?

I may one day tell you about what I am talking about, but at this very second, it would not be in good taste to tell you anymore than I just did.

Now, writing this I have indeed decided on abandoning this account, and that means all my other accounts associated with this one.

I do not want to stop being on this app, I'm an adult now (been an adult for like 6(?) months already) and I feel disgusted with my posts. Especially the ones of sexual nature, now I will not delete anything- frankly, this account and the old one before it are archives of how I was.

I'm different now... I swear to all that is holy, I'm different...

To an individual: I did not say anything in your asks, besides that one time when I was trying to contact you. sincerely the only reason why I had tried to contact you was what I told you in my message. Since you called me by my name on here, I feel I have the right to ya' know answer you're speculation. I would never, not anymore at least say what that ask had said. That is ya' know illegal. Now, I'm sorry in every possible way, especially for me contacting you. Ofc, I'm not gonna broadcast anymore on anything about you other than this statement.

So- stay tuned for updates on my new account.

I'm sorry for this being so ooc, and like not talking all fancy and shit. This is me, not some fucking charecter that I play, ok?

[starlingsrps]

vanessa atwood.

BASIC INFORMATION

FULL NAME: vanessa marie atwood (nee copeland)

REASONING: nah

NICKNAME(S): nessie, van

PREFERRED NAME(S): vanessa or van

BIRTH DATE: july 12

CHART: cancer sun/libra rising/scorpio moon/leo venus

AGE: thirty three

GENDER: female

PRONOUNS: she/her

ROMANTIC/SEXUAL ORIENTATION:  heterosexual

NATIONALITY: tbd

ETHNICITY: caucasian

CURRENT LOCATION: tbd; originally based in st. louis

LIVING CONDITIONS:

BACKGROUND

BIRTH PLACE: indianapolis, in

HOMETOWN: owenboro, ky

SOCIAL CLASS: middle

EDUCATION LEVEL: degree in vocal performance

FATHER: taylor copeland, 65, basketball coach for kentucky wesleyan

MOTHER: libby copeland, 65, retired nurse

SIBLING(S): jack, 39 (marathon runner); kendra cox, 36 (swimmer); eric, 34 (basketball)

BIRTH ORDER: youngest

CHILDREN: no.

PET(S): rosie, tabby cat

OTHER IMPORTANT RELATIVES: jessica copeland, 39 (taylor 10, alexis 6, ava 3); michael cox (addie, 6); carrie copeland, 26

PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIPS: there have been several but her most recent before beau was a pretty serious three year relationship that ended when they went to eric and carrie's wedding and he reacted to jokes about being next like he had been shot.

CURRENT RELATIONSHIP: married to beau atwood

OCCUPATION & INCOME

PRIMARY SOURCE OF INCOME: voice teacher out of the guest bedroom

SECONDARY SOURCE OF INCOME: for the first time since she was a teenager, she only has one job. it's AMAZING!

CONTENT WITH THEIR JOB (OR LACK THERE OF)?: is it what she always wanted? no but the met was very definitive about saying no and she was hitting a point where she loved opera but it didn't love her. in a dream paradise world, she would be renowned and be singing all the time but she doesn't think she'd be as happy as she is now.

PAST JOB(S): literally everything at some point but mostly waiting tables and bartending. she did have a career performing opera but was never as booked and busy as she would have wanted to be.

SPENDING HABITS: very frugal but also very not. when she is allowing herself to not be frugal? hoo boy.

MOST VALUABLE POSSESSION: her wedding ring

SKILLS & ABILITIES

PHYSICAL STRENGTH: p good upper/body and core, as it's helpful with projecting her voice.

DEFENSE: she's a mouthy little shit.

SPEED: nimble

INTELLIGENCE: street smarts moreso - good at reading people.

ACCURACY: not bad

AGILITY: good!

STAMINA: boundless

TEAMWORK: a very strong second in command but also an excellent finisher.

TALENTS: determined, generous

SHORTCOMINGS: impulsive, judgmental

LANGUAGE(S) SPOKEN: english fluently but she can sing in french/italian/german, depending on the job.

DRIVE?: yes

JUMP-STAR A CAR?: nope

CHANGE A FLAT TIRE?: nope

RIDE A BICYCLE?: yep

SWIM?: yep

PLAY AN INSTRUMENT?: piano

PLAY CHESS?: nope

BRAID HAIR?: yep

TIE A TIE?: kind of, given instructions.

PICK A LOCK?: no but she thinks she could, again given instructions.

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE & CHARACTERISTICS

FACE CLAIM: brianne howey

EYE COLOR: brown

HAIR COLOR: blonde

HAIR TYPE/STYLE: long with layers and the style depends on the day and occasion.

GLASSES/CONTACTS?: reading glasses

DOMINANT HAND: right

HEIGHT: 5'3

BUILD: petite

EXERCISE HABITS: general cardio and such

SKIN TONE: fair

TATTOOS: nah

PIERCINGS: ears

USUAL EXPRESSION: absolutely zero poker face and very expressive eyebrows.

CLOTHING STYLE: cute and casual and a big fan of a matching set. comfort is key and she's delighted to have a husband to steal flannel from.

JEWELRY: wedding ring always, whatever's right for the outfit otherwise.

ALLERGIES: nah

DIET: nothing too out of the ordinary and a big baker

PHYSICAL AILMENTS: —

PSYCHOLOGY

ENNEAGRAM TYPE: 8 - the challenger

MORAL ALIGNMENT: lawful neutral

TEMPERAMENT: sanguine

MBTI: ENFJ

MENTAL CONDITIONS/DISORDERS: nah.

SOCIABILITY: extrovert

EMOTIONAL STABILITY: steady but Dramatic.

PHOBIA(S): deep, dark open water. delighted to be landlocked.

ADDICTION(S): nah

DRUG USE: nah

ALCOHOL USE: socially

PRONE TO VIOLENCE?: nah.

MANNERISMS

SPEECH STYLE: spunky disney princess

ACCENT: not especially

HOBBIES: reading, very long walks, baking

HABITS: she likes being domestic - baking projects (ask her about her sourdough starter), projects around the house, teaching voice lessons. she likes being married - it gives her someone to tend and care for. acts of service bitch right here.

NERVOUS TICKS: she rubs her nose and shifts her weight around a lot

DRIVES/MOTIVATIONS: praise. she likes being told she's doing well.

FEARS: anything happening to beau and sharks. she knows one is more reasonable than the other.

POSITIVE TRAITS: confident, charismatic, self possessed, nurturing, kind

NEGATIVE TRAITS: stubborn, possessive, conflict avoidant, intense

SENSE OF HUMOR: good! giggly.

DO THEY CURSE OFTEN?: no more or less than anyone else

FAVORITES

ACTIVITY: singing, baking, hanging out with beau

ANIMAL: cats and squirrels

BEVERAGE: iced coffee

BOOK: not the biggest reader but can get down with a good bestseller

COLOR: yellow

DESIGNER: sezane

FOOD: grilled cheese

FLOWER: daisies

GEM: diamond

HOLIDAY: christmas

MODE OF TRANSPORTATION: walking or driving

MOVIE: the birdcage

MUSICAL ARTIST: taylor swift

SONG: "daylight" but also "o mio babbino caro"

SCENERY:

SCENT: beau and bread

SPORT: no. absolutely note. does vanessa know an ungodly amount about basketball? sure does (and will hustle when it comes time for march madness brackets) but she’s an artist in a family of jocks. her brother eric played for duke and professionally for a bit in europe and they all know he’s the favorite. 

TELEVISION SHOW: gilmore girls

WEATHER: love a good snowstorm. she love to prep.

VACATION DESTINATION: she and her opera singer girl posse did a big vacation together every year and honestly: anywhere warm where she can lay by a pool and have a margarita.

ATTITUDES

GREATEST DREAM: they've changed A Lot pretty quickly. she was dead set on making a career in opera and having a hard time accepting that she loved a career that didn't love her back. meeting beau came at the exact right time - it showed her this other venue of life that she hadn't even given much consideration. so her dreams now are as much time as she can with beau and a lot of kids.

GREATEST FEAR: rejection.

MOST AT EASE WHEN: relaxed with people she loves and who love her

LEAST AT EASE WHEN: she's being contradicted

BIGGEST ACHIEVEMENT: this. it's not a lot but it is hers.

BIGGEST REGRET: eh!!!

TOP PRIORITIES: beau, most other things

[marias-wonderland]

To start, let us first take a look at the word “Fell” and its various meanings.

Noun: Hide, Skin, pelt

Noun: A breed of Sheep. “Rough Fell”

Noun: A moorland pony. “Fell Pony.”

Verb: To Cut, knock or bring down. Past tense of “Fall.”

Adjective: fierce, cruel malevolent, deadly

Next, let’s look at the etymology of the word.

Noun: Middle English, from Old English; akin to Old Hight German, fel skin, Latin pellis

Verb: Middle English, from Old English fellan; akin to Old English feallan to fall

Adjective: Middle English fel, from Anglo- French – from the word Felon.

Evil, felon, deadly?  All words that could describe Hannibal Lecter. Hide, skin or pelt? Words to describe a man in disguise. A breed of sheep? A kind of horse? Did he perhaps think of Agent Starling when creating his persona?

What’s more, there is a fairly famous historical Doctor Fell, which Hannibal Lecter would have been familiar with. Doctor John Fell (June 23, 1625 – July 10, 1686) was an Englishman, academic, as well as the Bishop of Oxford, who worked extensively on translating several great works from Latin into English.

But Doctor John Fell is likely best known for a poem with supposed authorship by Tom Brown (The Dialogues of the Dead).  As a student at Oxford, Brown had gotten up to some kind of trouble – enough to get him expelled. Doctor Fell – so the story goes - offered to not expel Brown if he could translate  extemporaneously the 32nd epigram of Marial, which reads:

Non amo te, Sabidi, nec possum dicere quare. Hoc tantum possum dicere: non amo te.

The English translation is roughly:

I do not like you, Sabidius, and I can’t say why.                                              This muchI can say: I do not like you.

Instead of doing the literal translation, which Brown was clearly capable of doing, he instead gave the following:

I do not like thee, Doctor Fell                                                                            The Reason why I cannot tell;                                                                            But this I know, and know full well,                                                                    I do not like thee, Doctor Fell

True or not, Tom Brown was indeed expelled from Oxford, and the poem eventually made its way into Robert Graves’ (of I, Claudius fame) 1927 book Less Familiar Nursery Rhymes.

The poem is also briefly alluded to by the character of John Utterson in Robert Lewis Stevenson’s novel The Strange Case of Dr.Jekyll and Mr.Hyde.

There is something more if I could find a name for it. God bless me, the man seems hardly human! Something troglodytic, shall we say? or can it be the old story of Dr. Fell? or is it the mere radiance of a foul soul that thus transpires through, and transfigures its clay continent? The last, I think; for, O my poor old Harry Jekyll, if ever I read Satan’s signature upon a face, it is on that of your new friend.

This is significant for a few reasons, the first being that Hannibal follows many of the classic tropes of the Gothic novel, and indeed even mentions several famous Gothic novels within the text itself – Frankenstien, Dracula, and now here is a reference to The Strange Case of Dr.Jekyll and Mr.Hyde, a story about the duality of man – a seemingly nice doctor who does terrible things via his alter ego, which matches our own Doctor Fell/Hannibal Lecter perfectly.  It should also be noted that at the end of The Silence of the Lambs, “Buffalo Bill” was rebranded by The National Tattler as “Mr.Hide.”

We are never given Doctor Fell’s first name in the novel Hannibal, though I would like to safely assume that it is John. This references the historical character, but would also show Harris giving us significant characters in Clarice Starling’s life that share the name John in some form or another. Johnny Brigham, John Fell, and Jack Crawford – Jack, being a name often used for someone named John.

I DO NOT LIKE THEE DOCTOR FELL: HANNIBAL LECTER’S FLORENTINE IDENTITY

Artwork: Lecter with Frame by Roboqueer. Text added by Kathrynethegreat.

Nearly ten years after the reader left Hannibal Lecter behind in Thomas Harris’ The Silence of the Lambs, they find themselves meeting the good Doctor again – this time in Florence, living under the alias of Dr.Fell, the relatively new curator for the Capponi Library after the previous curator disappeared under suspicious circumstances…

But what is the significance of the name Dr.Fell?  As we all know, Thomas Harris chooses his words with great care, and Hannibal Lecter’s false identity is no exception.

Keep reading

[nathanbatemanfucker]

Lifelong: 20 years

summary: an impromptu trip across the country to take care of aaron.

pairing: fem!reader x aaron hotchner

content: unrequited love, guilt, angst, sadness, fluff if you squint kind of?

an: aaron is soooo baby in this one. okay my friends we’re close to the end here, hearts will be mended soon. next part is massive <3

word count: 1k

series masterlist | masterlist

When Aaron calls you for the second time this week you know that’s something’s up. The two of you have a weekly call that’s already been had and you’re still at work. In fact, he’s still at work.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’ve been served.”

“Divorce papers?” You can’t say you’re not shocked.

You know that they’ve been separated, you know that Haley’s wanted more but you always imagined that they’d work it out. They’ve been Aaron and Haley to you for so long that you’re not sure what a world looks like without them together, though your mind goes to selfish places immediately.

“Yeah.”

“Aaron, I’m so sorry. What do you need? What can I do?”

“I…” You hear shuffling on his end of the phone and can imagine him running a hand through his hair, “I don't know.”

“That’s okay. It’s okay to not know,” You have to say it because he’s not okay with that. He likes to know things, feels like he has to but you want him to just stop thinking about fixing everything for a moment. “Do you have any idea when the next case is?”

“I don’t know, we just got back from one.”

“Put in the time,” You say, switching tabs on your computer to look up a last-minute flight. It wouldn’t get you there until after midnight because of the time difference in Seattle, but it’ll do.

“It’s too late for-“

“You’re the boss. Put in the time.”

“I couldn’t ask you to waste your yearly visit on this.”

“You didn’t ask, it’s not a waste, and you’re my best friend.”

“Are you sure?”

“You just have to tell me how many days you’re putting in for so I can do the same.”

“3.”

It takes just a few clicks of a button to get your trip set up. You send an email to your boss citing a family emergency, “The flight’s booked, you’ll pick me up?”

“I’ll be there.”

He meant that in the most literal sense. When you arrive he's standing at the gate, looking down at his phone with that slight frown that's become his face’s resting place.

“You didn’t have to do your FBI privilege thingy,” You say as he embraces you tightly.

“I didn’t want you walking through here this late by yourself,” He murmurs before letting you go.

“There’s hardly anybody here,” You reply, gesturing around to the quiet airport.

“My point exactly,” He holds his hand out for your bag. There's no reason to argue with him and you hand it over with no protest. He transfers it smoothly to his far hand before offering his arm to you. Again, with no protest, you slip your arm into his and the two of you walk to his car that’s parked with airport staff.

“You know they built one of those burger joints from home here,” He says once the two of you are off the airport’s grounds.

“Fries do sound good. Have you been since they opened?”

“No, I was saving it for when you came into town.”

“Then take me, Hotchner.”

He reaches over to pinch your thigh playfully, “You don’t call me that.”

“I was trying to get a rise out of you. It worked. Predictable as always Aaron Hotchner.”

He rolls his eyes, and fiddles with the radio, turning on the oldies station you always listen to. It’s warm in Virginia still so you let down the window, and stick your feet out, resting your head on his shoulder while he orders the food. When you try to stick your hand in the bag he swats it away, and you pout the whole way home.

You feel 17 again eating burgers and greasy french fries on his couch. You talk about everything but Haley and the divorce. He’s somehow managed to give you every detail about his visits with Jack without even mentioning her name. All you can do is hold him close when his voice gets thick with tears. He doesn’t let them fall, but he gets to a point where he has to stop talking. He clings to you, listening to the sound of your breathing until he slips into a slumber.

His soft snore makes you smile and for a moment you let yourself bask in it. You let yourself imagine waking up to it, to this, him lying on your chest with his arms wrapped around you every day. The guilt comes quickly. Haley has always been kind to you, and always supported your friendship with him. Though you love Aaron with all of you, you can’t blame her for leaving him. Regardless, you’ll always be here to pick up the pieces because he’s yours, just not in the way you long for.

Eventually, you try to move to get cleaned up but his grip on you tightens, even in his sleep.

“Aaron,”

“Don’t, please, let’s just stay here,” He mumbles sleepily, his eyes barely opening.

“I just wanna clean up and then we can go lay down,” You pull away again and he looks up at you again with wide eyes. That sadness that you hadn’t seen since his wedding day is there and it makes your heartbreak. “Just let me throw this in the trash, stay right there, I’m not going anywhere.”

He nods and releases you, and you get your trash cleaned up and in the bin in record timing. He uses his bathroom to get dressed for bed, and you use Jack’s before heading into his room to lay down. He joins you shortly, facing away from you. You scooch across the bed, pressing into his back before throwing your arm over his side. Thinking he’s about to fall back to sleep, you close your eyes in an attempt to join him, though every cell in your body is standing at alert from being so affectionate with him.

“Do you think it was always meant to end like this? That I wasn’t made to be happy?” His voice startles you and he runs his hand over yours in apology.

“Hush, you’ll be happy again. You’ll be okay. We’ll make sure of it.”

“Promise?”

“Of course.”

“You’re always here. Thank you,” He leans further into you, and you curl your chin around his shoulder as he knots your fingers together.

“Always, Aaron.”

if you’d like to be tagged in this series let me know!

tagged: @ssahotchsbitch, @shyhotch, @chelseyjoyce, @dadbodhotch11, @ssamorganhotchner, @kuolonsyoja, @heliotropehotch, @averyhotchner, @zetasaturno99, @art-and-thoughts, @laurensprentiss, @ssa-montgomery, @thinking-bucky, @silvermercy, @freesiasandfics, @ashhotchner, @fightingdragonswithreid, @moonshine-evelyn, @emlynblack, @ssahotchnerxx, @sunshinexhotchner, @angelfxllcm, @wheelsupkels, @jaspxr, @gspenc, @sadgirlml, @hotchs-bitch, @crowfootwrites, @wilbur-rabbit, @hotched, @aaronhotchy, @mommyhotchner, @reidselle

series tagged: @lesbianhotch, @rousethemouse, @ssaddyhotchner, @skyler666, @katieslotherford, @kryptonitejelly, @eternal-silvertongued-prince, @red-red-rogue, @kajjaka, @dielgonacoffee

[foryourownbosom]

Favorite Laukids headcannons?

hi anon ! so sorry im answering this just now, life has been chaos with uni and i havent had the time to properly respond 😔 BUT THIS IS MY FAV ASK EVER SKFJKSFGDSG ITS MY TIME TO SHINE .

ALRIGHT. i have LOTS of fav headcanons,,,, probably too many. based on the number i am ashamed to admit how much time i waste thinking about this family. so, im gonna *try* to pick some of my favourites and write them below! (beware, this is gonna be long. because of that, the headcanons are gonna be under a cut for anyone who might actually be interested in reading them 😭) to the ones who do, enjoy <3

SO OKAY my favourite headcanon of them all (and the one that i believe i kind of,,, developed the most?) is that each sibling had a specific flower name as a nickname, all chosen by eleanor. i like to think that based on the traits and personality she saw in her children, eleanor would pick a flower whose symbolism matched with the child in question. when calling them, she would adress the children by those flowers (eg. calling jack "my sunflower", nelly "my little magnolia", etc!)

in the case of polly for example (the last one born shortly before eleanor's death), polly had "sweet pea" as a name. eleanor knew she wasnt going to live much longer but still wanted to continue the tradition of nicknaming her babies, so she chose a flower whose symbolism typically means strength, departures and goodbyes. according to the symbolism, sweet peas mean "thank you for a lovely time”. eleanor wanted to, at least, thank polly for the time she could spend together with her last baby, as short as it was. (i wont get into details about every nickname bc i would ramble for too long 😭- i really wanna make a separate post or smth explaining that one day kdjgksdgd,,, but thats mainly the reason why the laukids have a specific flower for each of them when i drew the charts :"))

alright so thats the *main* headcanon i have. here are some other fav hcs that are not that,, extense KDJSKAF. they are pretty much random thoughts i collected throughout time:

one night, way past their bedtimes, nelly and patsy swore they saw ghosts on the graveyard while going outside to play. they swore to never sneak out and go out to play at night ever again

henri, john and nelly (ages 5, 4 and 3) would often make "mud stew" on poodles after it rained with literally anything they could find.

their favourite games were playing pirates, climbing, and playing hide & seek behind the oak trees

john slipped from a pretty high branch that bruised his knee. that left a big scar on his left leg that even as an adult was still visible

nelly was the first one of the girls who started playing the harpsicord, and patsy followed after her sister. nelly would teach her simple little melodies and play together sometimes. after nelly passed away, john usually sat by patsy's side when she played so she wouldn't be alone. he couldn't play of course, but he tried singing to accompany patsy on the little melodies she learned by her late sister

john had really good hearing and could replicate bird sounds with high accuracy. that caused the birds to usually come very near him and to not fly away. patsy called john a "bird whisperer" because of that

kids patsy and john once found an egg below a tree, and brought it home to take care of it. it turned out to be a carolina parakeet, and patsy named her iris. they taught her,,, french curse words. and thought it was the funniest thing ever. after a few months, they set her free

polly has the record for the sibling that broke jars and china cups the most (followed by jemmy, but he would argue that those were harry's fault)

also, now that we are on the topic of harry and jemmy: although most of the time they were inseparable partners in crime, sometimes they would fight over really small things (but to them of course, those things were. pretty big deals™) one some occasions, they were so crossed with each other that they would sit the furthest from one another at the table, and used john as their messenger for days bc they refused to speak directly to the other. they would exchange Very Serious Angry Letters across the room as if they were two opposed kingdoms, and john was in the middle delivering those letters. john always succeeded on the mission to cease the fights though, and as soon as he would fall for a prank, he annoyingly (but happily) knew jemmy and harry befriended again

jemmy once beat harry on a game of marbles (harry was considered the best player among the siblings) and harry was so frustrated he swore to never play again. (that promise lasted, of course, less than a week. and that jemmy victory was probably the reason why they didn't speak to each other for days)

when john was a toddler he once doodled over an entire set of letters of henry sr and he had to start all over again from scratch. that child had 0 awareness of space and he thought literally everything was a potential canvas to draw on-

he also probably drank paint water while using watercolors too many times ,, (artists' culture for ya)

the Main Kids (john, patsy, harry and jemmy) would often organize little plays where they created stories and whole worlds/kingdoms with their characters in it. at night, they couldn't be as loud so with the help of candles they played by creating shadows on the walls

harry stopped two of his siblings from eating,,, questionable AND dangerous things by pure luck . one, when toddler jemmy wanted to eat a worm. and two, when he stopped john from eating a poisoned berry. (the latter was originally a bit dark though so i wont elaborate much)

jemmy was almost 6 years old when he sailed with john and henry sr to europe for schooling (harry joined a bit later), so i headcanon that his first tooth fell around that time while on port, and he rushed to john and showed it to him :")

jemmy doodled the three of them (he and his two older brothers) on a piece of paper, and john almost cried. he kept the drawing safe on one of his books so it wouldn't get lost or damaged

eleanor would always sing lullabies to the kids before bed because it help them wind down. after eleanor's gone, the siblings usually asked john to sing to them because he was the one who knew and remembered the melodies the most. while abroad in europe, john promised harry and jemmy that he would keep singing them for as long as he could.

john finds comfort in the fact that, at least, the last thing jemmy heard was a lullaby from his mother, sang by john. he hoped that it brought him peace for one last time.

when john, harry and jemmy were finally joining patsy and polly in europe, little polly was euphoric and was literally asking every 5 minutes when were their brothers arriving. polly had no memory of them as they all sailed when she was a baby, so of course the excitement was over the roof. when she finally met her brothers, she was glued to them, specially john. polly asked for piggyback rides and races all the time, as well as asking his brother how to do "fencing with sticks" which he delightfully obligued to provide lessons.

polly also made everyone attend and wear dresses to her Very Fancy Tea Party™ once

polly is the #1 candy theft. harry, the #1 victim of her robbery.

during the war, john liked to stay up really late and sleep by the fireplace of headquarters, as he sometimes did that with his siblings. he would also keep things that reminded him of home

later on her life, patsy would tell stories and memoirs of her childhood with john to both frances and polly. her own children would listen as well and would wonder what it would've been like to have met him

this is all for now! if you made it this far, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. i love you dearly, truly 😭😭😭💖💖 thanks for coming to my TED talk my fingers are sore from typing a

[tarosin]

the great adventures of y/n, tubbo and jack - we built a boat

requested: yes/no

this is part 10 to the great adventures series

you didn’t actually expect to be filming a vlog with tubbo and jack today, you were spending one of you last days away from home with lani at the beach, not knowing that tubbo and jack would make you join them. you ended up finding several rocks you liked and ran off to pick them up thinking tubbo would like them, so you put them in your pocket. whilst you were collecting rocks, lani was on the phone to tubbo letting him know you were actually at the beach if he wanted you to join him in the vlog.

“wait y/ns there? put them on the phone.”

“they’re in the water.”

“why?”

“ill ask, Y/N WHY ARE YOU IN THE WATER?!”

“I FOUND A ROCK THAT MATCHES RANBOOS BRAND BUT A WAVE TOOK IT AWAY FROM ME AND IM NOT LETTING POSEIDON WIN!”

“yeah they’re fighting Poseidon, where are you going to be? ill bring them to you.”

few minutes later you made your way to lani drenched in water.

“i fell…stop laughing!”

“im not!”

“you’re eyes are literally watering because you’re holding in your laughter, anyway look what i got you!”

you placed a clear quartz crystal and a piece of sea glass in lanis hand.

“thank you y/n!! wait this isn’t like your other rocks?”

“i know!! it’s clear quartz and sea glass. i felt like you should have it! i think it’s because i won the battle with Poseidon!”

“you fell.”

“shut up!”

“are you staying at ours again tonight?”

“think so… wanna turn the crystal into a necklace?”

“definitely!”

lani ended up taking you to where tubbo was, but didn’t tell you what was happening, you only found out when you looked up to see jack recording you and lani.

“hold up, guest appearance.”

“oh hi lani…y/n, guess what?”

you looked down to see the boat.

“oh fuck no!”

you walked away laughing, tubbo followed after you dragging you back to the others.

“they said they can’t wait to go on the boat with us jack!”

“how likely is he to be able to build this?? how likely are me and y/n going to drown??”

“uhm good chances!”

“of what?”

“lani, am i going to live or die?”

you laughed as lani walked away shrugging.

“tubbo how much money did you spend on this…”

“£50.”

“oh great i’m drowning today!”

you stood next to jack tilting your head as tubbo attached the sail to the pole.

“just remember if you two die, i’m in your will.”

“i didn’t write a will.”

“well that was your first mistake y/n did!”

“tubbo gets my rock collection, tommy gets whatever he wants just not the rock collection, ranboo gets whatever tommy doesn’t want, and you get what ranboo doesn’t want.”

a few minutes later you helped tubbo put the sail up whilst jack stood filming you both.

“this looks unsafe..”

“and muddy.”

“it’s unsafe and muddy but we’re trying our best.”

“jack didn’t do anything.”

“rude!”

you stood next to lani trying to convince her to go on the boat so you didn’t have to as tubbo tried to lasso jack. after being told no several times, you stood with jack whilst tubbo began to tie a figure of 8, you watched as tubbo began teaching you how to actually tie a figure of 8 using a really morbid story.

“…heh”

“why was that so morbid?”

“we like death on the tubbo channel!”

“i want to go home!”

“no!”

“okay!”

the three of you began to carry the boat out to the sea, however you crashed into something straight away.

“could be worse…could have hit a member of the public.”

“IM TRYING!”

“i can tell…it’s not good enough but i can tell.”

“…TO HIT SOMEONE!”

“NO!”

“my bad T bo!”

“what the fuck did you call me?”

as you were getting ready to go down the ramp, lani looked directly at you and tubbo who were now trying to push each other into the water.

“try not to hit little people in the water!”

“little people…”

“shall we waterproof up?”

you turned around a minute later only to have tubbo holding his phone up to your face after annoying jack with it .

“say hello.”

“hi there , please send help. i’m going to die!”

“ignore y/n, they’re just dramatic..i wouldn’t let them drown.”

you helped tubbo get the boat into the water as jack filmed the pair of you .

“it’s cold.”

“i’ve been in here before…i fell.”

“how cold was it?”

“very.”

“the weed of the sea is in my feet.”

“ew! what the fuck!”

lani noticed you had all let go of the boat and yelled at you all to grab the boat before it left you all behind, jack, and tubbo got in the boat, however you refused as lani kept yelling that the trailer was on.

“oh we’ve left the trailer on.”

“that’s what lani has been saying.”

tubbo got off to untie the trailer and you stood nervously laughing as the wheel fell off .

“i'm actually going to die!”

“it’s fineee!”

you helped jack get out the boat, so you could all fix the boat.

“he thinks we could be doing better.”

“i think everyone could think that.”

jack got on the boat first, then tubbo, who then helped you get onto the boat.

“off we go!”

for the first five minutes, the three of you sat yelling at each other what you all should be doing to make the boat go forwards.

“i quite like this.”

“we’re not moving!”

“exactly!”

soon enough you had figured it all out and waved goodbye to the others after they gave you a thumbs up.

“TO FRANCE!”

“so now what do we do?”

“pray.”

“heh?”

“to what?”

“god..say your final goodbyes we’re going to die!”

“hey that rhymed, you’re a genius!”

at this point the boat had completely stopped moving, however tubbo didn’t think this was the case, and began trying to turn the boat around as it was apparently going to shore, despite the fact you and jack were telling him you all hadn’t moved.

“so what’s the sail for?”

“i mean jack has a point you are paddling.”

“luck!”

“….HEH?”

“y/n you talk to technoblade too much.”

“i’ve been saying heh before i met tommy, what the fuck?”

“jack go up to the front, so y/n can sit next to me.”

jack moved and you sat next to tubbo.

“so how long does it take to go to france?”

“ahh you know, about 20 minutes.”

“how fast do you think we’re going bud?”

“on a, on a, on a train.”

“how would you get the train?”

“i don’t think the train can go across this..”

rather than answering that question tubbo decided he made a hit list.

“we’re going to just go through here.”

“…through where?”

“between the people.”

“NO!”

“you’re creating unnecessary danger.”

you and tubbo started bickering about why he suddenly decided that he was going to hit a bunch of people with the boat for no reason.

“fine you take control y/n!”

“tubbo you were going to kill them!”

“that’s just part of the sailing life!”

you just stared at tubbo shaking your head slightly, trying to process what just happened, then all of a sudden tubbo got up and put you in charge of controlling the boat. you were surprisingly good at it, which was lucky for tubbo and jack who were now leaning out of the boat claiming that they were hiking. they only stopped when the boat began to go faster and noticed you had no idea what you were doing.

“y/n is going to be the reason we crash!”

“yeah i will!”

“why do you sound happy about that?”

“eta france?”

“any second now.”

you decided to focus on making sure the boat was going where you wanted it to go, whilst the others yelled out to the sea occasionally yelling phrases in french as they claimed they could see the french. well you think tubbo was yelling phrases in french, however halfway through you were convinced he started just yelling things in a french accent as he revealed he didn’t actually know french, resulting in jack asking to go to russia as he knows russian.

“y/n, sail is to russia!”

“you know what i don’t wanna drive here you go jack it’s your turn.”

“I DONT KNOW HOW TO DRIVE!”

“we’re sick of this shit aren’t we y/n, jack take that…you’re on the wrong side switch sides with us.”

you all swapped sides and you and tubbo sat with your arms around each other instructing jack how to sail .

“yeah, yeah, yeah.”

“thats good now turn us and we’ll be in the wind.”

“we’re about to catch the wind.”

“JACK MANIFOLD GET READY!”

you all swapped sides again and tubbo whispered in your ear, as you sat next to him, about making the boat capsize so jack would go into the water, jack ended up doing a lot better than you and tubbo did, and you all actually started going pretty fast. however, there was absolutely no way you’d get to land any time soon. you sat laughing with tubbo whilst jack yelled about how he was a fisherman, and that’s why he was doing so well and how he studied their fins so he could find out how fish swim.

“for a £50 boat it’s done us well, look we’re sailing, the water cleaned the boat.”

“we havent died.”

“im a little wet, but not too bad.”

“must be nice.”

“oh yeah you fell earlier.”

“how?”

“they were fighting Poseidon.”

“huh?”

“they probably found a rock they liked and went to get it but it ended up in water.”

“…yeah.”

you all ended up catching the wind and tubbo decided to make you and jack do reaction images.

“help girl, i don’t know how to sail.”

“okay jack your turn, drive and film.”

“hey look i’m filming and driving!”

“no film me and y/n!”

jack filmed the pair of you, tubbo had his arm around you to prevent you from falling out of the boat as you had a habit of leaning out the boat to touch the water. you had no idea what to do so ended up copying tubbo, the pair of you took off your hats .

“tips fedora…what do you want to name our boat?”

“tubboat!”

“no way..”

“THE TUBBOATS REAL NOW!!”

it was around now you and tubbo claimed you were all drifting out to sea, and to just let the wind take you wherever it wants to, whereas jack claimed the boat wasn’t moving at all. you pointed at a boat which was moving a lot quicker than you were.

“HES GOT WIND!”

“WHERES OUR WIND?”

“he stole our wind.”

“we’re stranded jack,y/n.”

you noticed lani and waved out to her.

“LANI!”

“jacks sailing, hes getting sailing tips from my cousins!”

“great can he take us to land?”

“no.”

“YO WERE ZOOMING!”

“i hope we don’t capsize..”

“why would we?”

tubbo looked at you and you nodded back at him.

“hey jack we’re gonna tip this boat!”

and with that the pair of you stood up and began tipping the boat over whilst laughing.

“SUCKER WERE STILL DRY!”

“tubbo i’m about to fall!”

tubbo grabbed your hand keeping you up on the boat with him, you both even managed to get back in the boat without getting wet.

“no, if i’m in you have to be in too.”

jack pushed tubbo into the water tubbo then went on to pull you into the water with him.

“NO!”

“IM FREEZING!”

tubbo helped you onto the boat first as this was the second time you ended up in the water, and you were quite clearly cold, he got on after you. you sat on the boat as he filmed the outro and jumped back into the water. once jack ended the recording, you reached out your hand to tubbo helping him back onto the boat. the way back to shore was you and tubbo clinging onto each other trying to warm up, and the three of you making shit jokes, and enjoying each other’s company. you even made a few more plans for when ranboos in the uk. few hours later you had said goodbye to jack and went back to tubbos house, tubbo let you shower first while he stayed with lani as she streamed.

“chuck your clothes outside the door, i’ll put them in the dryer whilst you shower. you can change into these.”

tubbo gave you a hoodie from his merch collection that would be dropping soon, along with your pyjama pants, 30 minutes later you sat with lani whilst tubbo went off to shower, lani ended up finishing the stream after 15 minutes.

“wanna make the necklaces lani?”

“i’d love to!”

not long later tubbo joined the pair of you.

“oooh tubbo i got you some more rocks, they're over there with your phone.”

you ended up making a couple of them into necklaces for him, so the the three of you had something to help you remember the day.

“y/n, i hope you’re enjoying your stay, youll practically be living here for a few month soon.”

“wait their parents said yes?!”

“what are you all talking about?”

taglist:

@dumb-chaotic-bi-energy @uselesssapphickitten @l0ver0fj0y @etheriaaly @xx-smiley-xx @hawarun @kylobensgirl @cawcaw-pretty-thing @reverse-iak @renleicrashed @augustine-is-joy @c1loudee