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#but there is not much cringe here
reasonsforhope · 6 months
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Sometimes you just have one of those moments where the progress we've made as a culture get thrown into stark relief. You look at something and go "Holy shit, that would never have happened when I was a kid."
Today, I had one of those moments when I realized that the teenage boys I'm working with are just. genuinely, openly enthusiastic about going to Build-a-Bear for their outing.
These are sixteen and seventeen year old boys! They just had a whole conversation about what to name their "cute", mostly new squishmallows! They're genuinely excited that they're going to Build-a-Bear this weekend and asking other kids to pick up specific accessories for them!!
Holy shit, that never would've happened when I was 16. None of the boys would have dared to be visibly interested - and neither would most of the girls! There would have been a million gay jokes and "Haha, you're a girl" jokes and "What are you, a baby?" jokes. Teenagers weren't even supposed to care about anything back then!
Less than 15 years later, and I'm watching three 17 year old boys treat all that as not even worthy of comment.
So let's call that a reason for hope. Even when the kids aren't alright, in some ways apparently they are alright. Go Gen Z, honestly. It's so lovely to watch you guys just openly doing and saying stuff that, when I was a teen, would've been a social death sentence.
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la-pheacienne · 6 months
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I'm reading the lord of the rings and I'm once again amazed at how... good most characters are. Like, they are genuinely good people. They are a bunch of kindhearted, gracious, caring people, coming together under adverse circumstances and trying to figure things out and find a solution and support each other through it all. Like Frodo and Sam meet Faramir and Faramir is a bit suspicious at first and kind of implies Frodo may be a spy, and then when he hears his story and he's like Frodo, I pressed you so hard at first. Forgive me! It was unwise in such an hour and place. And this blows.my.mind. He wasn't even particularly mean or threatening to him in the beginning, he's just such a kind, considerate man, recognizing the kindness and honesty of another man. And they're all like that. Even Gollum starts slowly changing (for a short while) when he encounters Frodo because that's the thing about kindness and humility and grace, they are contagious. They transform people, even a creature like Gollum cannot be immune to that. Like, you may consider all this simple and basic and I get it but, hear me out. It is quite rare to see that in modern media and it is also pretty difficult to pull off in a way that is not corny and simplistic. It is mind blowing that you actually don't have to present the entire palette of human cruelty and vice in order to tell a compelling story, contrary to popular belief. Lotr does the exact opposite, and it is just beautiful and it warms my heart. Especially taking into consideration tolkien's pretty grim growing-up experience, him being a double orphan without a home, raised between an orphanage and a priest and having no family apart from his brother and then the war and then he almost dies and then he's poor as hell and then a second war and it all makes sense somehow. He writes to his wife who is also an orphan two days before the marriage "the next few years will bring us joy and content and love and sweetness such as could not be if we hadn't first been two homeless children and had found one another after long waiting" and, yes, yes! The love and sweetness just radiate from his work, the entire lotr series is a little radiant bubble of hope and love and grace that he imagined in his head to deal with a dismal reality and then he just gave that to the world, and isn't that what imagination and art is all about after all?
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lazylittledragon · 2 months
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hi i'm unw el l
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ladsofsorrow24 · 8 months
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7 years... still the same thing lol (also the old art is from this post)
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b0nelessdoodles · 4 months
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i keep thinking im gonna like actually finish these but that ain't happening so have some gay people
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lucienff · 7 months
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the leader and his bloodhounds
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cthulhu-lemon · 22 days
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did I do this right
anyway this is mormon trauma Miku
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vellichorom · 6 months
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did you know i ALSO dabble in spooky monthifying all KINDS of characters? at the PEAK of last october, i spedrun through drawing canons, fancharacters, & OC references in the spooky month artstyle for a thing between friends & DAMMIT I'm STILL PROUD of them!
so here's me flexing a little;
FEATURING! @thedoodlecorner's OCs as WELL as @tomiechu's !!!!
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 2 years
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You can wash off the makeup, but the mascara still runs.
[First] Prev <—>Next
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karmathehalflander · 1 month
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Are we at a point in society where we’re ready to talk about how Eddie and Venom are both absolutely autistic and the movies double as a metaphor for nurodivergance as well as queerness and that we really don’t talk about it enough and also I need more fanfic of them being autistic?
Edit: I have now made and posted that in depth post about this if anyone is interested
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luck-of-the-drawings · 7 months
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my TWO FAVORITE THINGS IN THE WORLD, VAMPIRES N COWBOYS... deacon keller is SUCH a fun character, hes charming and funny but ALSO formidable and STRONG when he feels he needsta be. i hope him and arthur can get a chance to talk more and be better friends. l ike really good friend s. . like. like really good f. hangon i gotta go i think i hauve rabies.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#jrwi suckening spoilers#deacon keller#arthur bennett#OOUGUGHHAAOGUguguhh i feel so cringe whenever i ship two characters. like theyre not even REAL#why cant i be more 'hyperfixated' on getting bitched or something. CHRIST. anwyay i want em to hold hands or smth. yknow. freak stuff.#SO DEACON KELLER!! HE OVERHEARD ARTHUR TALKIN ABT THIS PLACE GETTING ATTACKED.. WE SAW HIM APPROACHING#AND THEN THE WHOLE FEAST PORTION OF THE PARTY HAPPENED N HE GOT STUCK#BUT HE KNEEEWW HE OVERHEARD ARTHUR SOMEHOW!! i just think thats neat. hes dedicated to protecting his people. hes respectable!!#GOD he doesnt even have that much screen time but i LOVE HIMMM n his silly lil shadow steed named Sunshine.. like cmon.... ugh.....#hes sweet n hes funny and he CAARES about the things hes in charge of on some levels. he certainly does his best to look after his own.#god idk what else to write here other than how much hes been on my MMMIND lately. the doctors are still running diagnostiscs#i just think hes so neat... also i think its funny that hes afraid o snakes. OH YKNOW lemme just talk abt my damn art. first o all this too#SSSOOO LONG. WEEKS EVEN.IVE BEEN WORKIN ON IT SINCE EP 5 WAS ON PATREON.it was sposed to be justa buncha doodles but then it Evolved#idk man...cowboys are just so cool...especially w VAMP POWERS..fastest shot in the west for a REASON BABY...n with the red smoke#n the glowing eyes..CMOn thats so cool i hadta get my visions into reality. the eyes were inspired by the music video for RATTLESNAKE (kglw#that where the IM THE SERPENT lines come from.lyrics from tha song.ooh yeah i love kglw so much...i also have other hidden messages here#i like to hide things...ALSO ALSO. I HAD SO MUCH TROUBLE W SO MUCH O THIS. the two bits with arthur n deacon biting eachother. AGONY#POSES ARE SO HHARRDDD SAME WITH THAT doodle o arthur slammin deacons head into the ground. WEEKS to get that pose RIGHT. I BLED SO MUCH#OHH AND GUNS???COWBOYHATS?? HIS GAY LIL JACKET? W THE DANGLIES?? AGOONYYY IT TOOK SO LONG TO PERFECT IT..especialy guns. OUUUHH#i also dont draw mustaches enough... which sucks bc im weak for a good mustache... BUT i think im doing pretty well on that.#it was hard but yknow what!! i think i did good! i rly like how this all turned out!! EXCEPT FOR THA FUCKIN RIBBON BOW THING I FORGOT TODRA#IN THE TOP RIGHT... THAT I JSUT NOTICED...its fine its fine i dont care that much. this is good enough to FEAST upon so im content n happy.#anyway i gotta leave ina few hours to start TRAINING for my NEW JOB!! CHEER FOR ME!! TRUCK IS A BLACKJACK DEALER NOW!! IEAAAHHH BABYYYY!!!!#thanku for reading my weird lil scrolls i bury beneath my posts. if u leave tags i WILL absorb them. and feel joy.
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unspuncreature · 10 days
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howdy, y’all
i am scheduled for top surgery in just a few short months! i’ve wanted this surgery since i was 14, and i’m beyond stoked that it’s really truly finally happening
although i have a little in savings, i live paycheck to paycheck, and i need your help to keep the lights on while i’m recovering
click here to view my gofundme campaign! even a $5 or $10 gift goes a long way towards offsetting the costs of surgery not covered by my insurance provider and carrying me through recovery while i am unable to work
if you’re unable to donate right now, please share this post to your dashboard, with your personal trainer, on your nearest bathroom stall wall, or with that one 3 person group chat with the really specific name. you know the one i’m talking about
sincerely, thank you so much for taking the time to read and share and donate. this online space has been beyond important to me through transition, and i wouldn’t be the person i am today without you and your shitposts and meta and edits and fanart and fic and friendship
i love u guys :o)
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creamhoodie · 1 year
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˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ Internet Cafe Love ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖
synopsis: The white haired boy who regularly visits the same internet cafe as you becomes your boyfriend but can your relationship survive when his best friend seems distrustful of you?
warnings: 7,915 words (long one shot with multiple settings),Nagi X female reader, gamer Nagi, per fluff no smut since it is written while he attends high school still.
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You had often noticed the white haired boy at the internet cafe as he seemed to go nearly every night the way you did. 
While you also brought projects and subjects to study on the side when you were taking a break, you noticed he never took breaks, the clicking of the keyboard and mouse were constant companions. This had led to you bringing your own noise canceling headphones that were much more soundproof than the gamer ones that came with the PC set at the cafe.
That was your current situation, headphones in practicing a new writing style of kanji when you felt a light tapping on your headphones. You glanced up and towering over you was the white haired boy. He wore an oversized gray sweatshirt and black sweatpants. You moved your headphones around your neck. 
“Did you need something?” You asked, meeting his gray eyes. 
“Do you have any money?” He asked straightforwardly. 
“Money? What for?” You asked, looking him up and down again. He didn’t seem in need based on his lounge outfit and you now noticed the light up rainbow keyboard he had under his arm. It had gone unnoticed before since his tall domineering figure was the main spectacle. 
“Lemon tea. I wanna buy one from the vending machine but I’m low on money because I spent it all on this and the gacha games on my phone,” he said motioning to the keyboard.
You raised a brow at not only his abruptness but also his poor money management. You had some cash on you but weren’t too keen on giving it up since you planned on getting food at your favorite food stand after you left the cafe.
“Well I don’t have any money,” you said.
“Bummer,” he replied, not sounding convinced as he plopped down in the spot next to you and began removing the default keyboard and setting his own up to the PC. 
You bit the inside of your cheek, chewing on it a little to hide your annoyance. Now he was gonna be right next to you making all this noise. 
“Do you really have to sit here?” You asked. 
He looked over at you as the PC booted up, his gray eyes seeming slightly hurt.
“Is that a problem?” He asked. The way he asked made you feel guilty. Yes he was a bit eccentric and odd but so far he was harmless.
“No it’s fine,” you said. By now your kanji was forgotten and you watched as he opened a first person shooter game and signed into his account.
“God of soccer?” You teased regarding his gamertag. 
“Oh yeah I’m on the soccer team at Hakuho High School,” he said. 
This guy went to the elite prep school? He didn’t seem like the type. You yourself were in the neighboring public school.
“I wasn’t aware Hakuho had a team,” you stated as he loaded into a game. 
“My friend Reo and I started the club up so we’d have a team to go to nationals.”  His focus was now on his game however as he had chosen a sniper character. You watched as he hit every headshot. He was eerily good at the game and you didn’t miss how match chat came up with the enemy team accusing him of using aimbot. When his team won the game he exited the queue and remained on the menu and looked over at you as he had been aware you were watching the whole time.
“You’re really good, how long have you played that game?” You asked.
“Just a few months now,” he said, shrugging. 
“And you aim that good already?” You asked in disbelief. You weren’t half bad yourself and had always considered your aim to be impressive but his was godly.
“I grew up playing first person shooter games,” he said as if it was no big deal. He glanced at your notepad before adding, “what’s with the studying?” 
You blushed. 
“I alternate between studying and gaming,” you answered his question. 
“No, I mean I see you studying here all the time even when it’s not exam season,” he said. So he had noticed you before as well? That was to be expected as you were both regulars. 
“I just like to study consistently,” you replied. He made a face and you added, “you don’t? You go to Hakuho, surely that’s more rigorous than my public school.” 
“Well sure but I just study a few days before the exams. Hey, are you sure you don’t have any money? I could really use that lemon tea.” 
His delivery made you wanna laugh. He was easy going and charming all without meaning to be and yet he was still odd, you hadn’t ever met anyone like him before. 
“I'm still thinking about it. Do you have a name or is it just god of soccer?” You asked. 
He chuckled.
“My name is Seishiro Nagi. What’s yours?” 
“Y/N Y/LN,” you replied, telling him your first and last name as well.
“Nice,” he replied, “you wanna play some games?” 
The two of you were duos on the same team with him playing the sniper character again and you his support offering him both damage boosts and heals. Between both of your combined skills and efforts the two of you went on an eight game win streak. 
An hour of gaming had gone by even though it didn’t feel like it and the two of you decided to call it quits.
“So Y/N,” he started.
“No about the lemon tea,” you joked. He shook his head.
“Forget about that. I have a home game tomorrow at my school in the evening. The match starts at two. You should come,” he said. You noticed the slight pinking of his ears when he said it. 
“I’ll try to go,” you said. You did enjoy playing with him even though originally you had felt slightly annoyed by his presence. 
“You should, our school’s marching band is gonna be there too for the first time,” he said. He finished unplugging his keyboard and putting the original one back and stood up. He scrolled through his phone quickly before adding, “will you be back online tonight? Maybe we could play some more too.” 
You felt your heart somersault at how he sounded hopeful.
“I may but I’m not sure I don’t usually play late.” 
“Bummer. Hey Y/N?” 
You prepared to be asked about the damn lemon tea again. 
“What?”
“Do you have a boyfriend?” He asked shyly.
“No I don’t.” 
“Good keep it that way. I’ll see you online tonight,” he said quickly before waving bye and taking off. 
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You were back home in your room that night freshly showered and sitting on your bed getting ready to settle in for the night and watch TV. 
You heard a notification from your PC and received the notification on your phone as well through the gaming app. 
It was Nagi using the whisper feature where you could message online friends direct messages.
GodOfSoccer: get on 
You smiled at his eagerness. 
SleepyKoala: Kinda don’t want to I’m tired
GodOfSoccer: don’t care I wanna play with you 
SleepyKoala: Nagi we played so much today 
GodOfSoccer: true well are you coming to my game tomorrow? 
SleepyKoala: Yes
GodOfSoccer: WOHOO LETS GOOO 
GodOfSoccer: forgot to say earlier cute gamertag 
SleepyKoala: Thanks :) 
GodOfSoccer: give me your number 
You did and not even a minute went by before you got a message from him. It was a plushie of a koala on his desk next to his PC monitor. You also caught a view of the rainbow keyboard from earlier. You created a contact ID for him and added a koala emoji to the end of his name. 
You: Cute plushie 
Nagi: he says thank you. I’m gonna game a bit I’ll see you tomorrow 
You: see you 
You then settled at last to watch more of the Netflix show you were currently binging until you lulled to sleep. 
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The next morning you woke up at noon having slept in later than you would have liked. After doing your morning routine and eating, you made your way to the supermarket to buy a lemon tea for Nagi. 
You hadn’t been able to ignore the butterflies that you had gotten thinking about him. You had checked his online status and had noticed he had stayed up until one in the morning gaming. 
Supermarket mission successful, you began to make your way to Nagi’s high school. You had timed your schedule perfectly so the metro would arrive at 1:30 giving you enough time to head to the stadium before the game started. Your outfit of choice was casual with a tote bag to hold the lemon tea and your noise canceling headphones though you doubted you’d need them. 
Arriving at the school on time you couldn’t help but notice how much more expensive everything seemed. You knew it was an elite academy but as you followed the crowd into the stadium you noticed just how much the school invested into its extracurriculars. 
“Y/N!” 
You turned around and there was Nagi coming up to you. 
“Hey Nagi,” you replied feeling slightly shy from your flirtatious exchanges with him. 
“You like the stadium? Reo’s dad is this mega rich guy and he donated the funds and manpower to build it. He doesn’t care for soccer but he frequently donates funds to the school for them to use for whatever purpose they’d like.” 
You nodded. He looked handsome in his soccer uniform, the black jersey, shorts and black socks contrasting against his white hair and skin. 
“Oh before I forget, since you kept asking yesterday,” you said, taking the tea bottle out of the tote bag and giving it to him. That made him laugh in glee.
“Thanks for this,” he said gratefully. 
“Nagi! We need to warm up!” A purple haired figure shouted as he ran over. When he caught up to where the two of you were his equally purple eyes were distrustful of you. 
“Reo. This is Y/N. Remember I told you about her?” Nagi said. 
So this was Reo? His suspicious eyes took you all in.
“Yeah I remember. Nice to meet you,” he said but his words didn’t match his tone or expression.
“Nice to meet you too. Nagi’s talked a lot about you as well,” you said and you noticed that did soften his eyes a bit if not fully. 
Nagi seemed oblivious. 
“Y/N, if you sit there you’ll have a good view of me,” he said pointing to a specific section before continuing, “and I want you to look at me not any of these other guys.” 
His words sent a jolt of heat between your legs and to your face but you simply nodded and assured him you’d be watching him. 
“Nagi,” Reo scolded impatiently, “we have to warm up.” 
“Alright alright,” he said following him but yelling back to you, “stay after. Text me if you can’t find me.” 
You headed to the section he had designated would have the best view of him. 
Throughout the game Nagi had lived up to his gamertag. He truly was a god of soccer. He was lightning bolt fast his legs moved just as fast as you had seen his fingers were capable on the keyboard. 
He also worked incredibly well with Reo. They were a dynamic duo on the field and the passes between them were strategic. 
When Nagi had scored a goal he had looked directly at you and pointed, unmistakably claiming it had been for you. 
His team was in the lead right now and you hoped it would remain that way. 
During the halfway break, you waited eagerly waiting to see him again. When they came back his eyes searched for you instantly and met yours sending you a sweet smile. As expected his team won and you cheered happily for him. As others started leaving the stadium you waited for him afterwards like he had asked you to. 
You didn’t have to wait longer than ten minutes. He was racing towards you, changed clothes, freshly showered and his gym bag over his shoulder. To your dismay you noticed Reo tagging along behind. It’s not that you didn’t like him, you just didn’t understand his scowls and distrustful attitude toward you.
“Y/N! Did you like the game?” He asked, standing in front of the railing of the seat you had remained at. 
“I did. It was so great seeing you score,” you said. 
“I wanted to score for you,” he said, his cheeks turning pink. “Hey Reo and I are gonna go get something to eat. Do you wanna come?” 
Your eyes dashed to Reo a second after Nagi asked the question and you could tell he was exasperated.
“That’s okay I think I’m just gonna head home,” you said softly. 
Of course you wanted to spend time with Nagi but you couldn’t risk Reo disliking you even more after all he is Nagi’s best friend his opinion must count for something. 
Nagi, still oblivious to all this, furrowed his brows in confusion.
“Okay. Well when can I see you again?” He asked. He seemed hurt that you weren’t coming. 
“I’m free tomorrow. Maybe text me later and we can come up with something,” you offered, not feeling comfortable under Reo’s purple gaze. 
“Okay I will. Thanks for coming, it really means a lot,” he said, giving you a sideways hug now as you stepped down from the bench you had been sitting at. He towered over you and he smelled incredibly good. 
“You’re welcome. I enjoyed every minute of it.” 
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“So how long have you and Reo known each other?” You asked as you took another mouthful of ramen. When you had gone home yesterday you had gotten caught up on school work and chores. Nagi had texted you at night and asked if you wanted to play some games to which you had agreed. Somewhere between steam rolling the enemy teams and playing silly custom games in the arcade he had suggested going out for ramen and boba the next night.
Now as the two of you sat in the restaurant’s outdoor patio seating with red paper lanterns illuminating the night sky you were interested in knowing more about his best friend who didn’t seem to take to you. 
“Not too long. I met him here at school probably six months ago,” he replied. 
“He seems very fond of you,” you said. 
Nagi shrugged.
“Reo got me into soccer and I have him to thank for that. Before him no one really talked to me at school.” 
This surprised you. He was good looking and charming, sure a bit strange and had his quirks but he was friendly and good company.
“Really? Not even girls?” You teased. 
“Especially girls,” he joked back. His gray eyes were looking at you softly. It gave your stomach butterflies. Lately it seemed like all he did was either give you butterflies or make you belly laugh. His hand reached out to lift your chin up so you were forced to meet his gray gaze head on. 
“You always look away from me when you notice me looking at you. You never look at me for too long,” he said in a gentle tone. 
“I don’t mean to on purpose,” you said trying to be casual although the thumping of your heart was a great contrast to the calm you were trying to portray. 
“I like when you look at me and when you watch me play video games and soccer,” he said, inching closer to bridge the gap between the two of you as you sat on opposite ends of the table. 
Was he going to kiss you? It seemed like that was his intention. You wanted to kiss him but worry and concern and feeling Reo’s stinging rejection you pulled your chin from his hand and looked away. When you glanced back at him he wasn’t looking at you for once but looking down at his lap with clear hurt in his eyes. 
“I thought you liked me too,” he said with embarrassment coloring his voice. You couldn’t take him thinking you were rejecting him, not when he was perfect and sweet and everything you could ever want.
“I do like you!” You said. 
“Then why won’t you let me kiss you? I want to so badly,” he asked in desperation.
“Reo-“ you started but he didn’t let you finish.
“Oh,” he said, sounding deflated, “do you like him or something?” It was obvious he was trying to sound nonchalant but jealousy threatened to burst through.
“No no I don’t. I mean I don’t dislike him. He’s your best friend so I don’t have anything against him. I just don’t like him in the way I like you,” you stammered. His response had thrown you off completely because it was the last thing you had expected him to say. 
“You don’t like him? Lots of girls do because his dad is that rich guy and girls think Reo is good looking,” Nagi said. 
“No, I don't see him that way. I like you,” you said, face flushing at your confession. 
“I’m confused. What does Reo have to do with you not letting me kiss you then?” 
“It’s just. Reo doesn’t seem to like me. He looks at me as if he’s distrustful and suspicious,” you said. 
Nagi instantly relaxed and laughed.
“Oh that’s just how he is. He’s very overprotective of me. It’s nothing personal he’ll grow out of it once you’re around more,” he said. 
While Nagi’s words assured you, you still found the whole bit a little odd but maybe that was just their friendship. Maybe Reo saw Nagi as a brother he looked out for. You decided to focus on the latter part of his sentence. 
“Once I’m around more?” 
At this he reached out across the table taking your hands in his.
“You know how I asked you if you have a boyfriend?” He asked playfully.
“Yes it wasn’t that long ago Nagi,” you replied.
“Well I want to be your boyfriend,” he said. He looked at you from under his long eyelashes, his gray eyes so sweet and vulnerable. 
“Well I don’t know this guy at the internet cafe told me to not go getting a boyfriend,” you teased.
“What a little prick he probably wants you for himself,” he went along with your joke. 
The two of you laughed before he spoke again, 
“Can I be your boyfriend? I promise to be good.” 
“Yes you can be Nagi,” you replied. 
“Awesome. Can I kiss you now?” He asked practically whining.
“Yes Nagi,” you laughed but your lips were soon overtaken by his. The kiss was sweet and made your head spin. 
You wondered if this is what it meant to be on cloud nine. 
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Your routine for the past few weeks had become Nagi centered. 
You continued to go to the internet cafe regularly. In fact that’s where you spent the most time with Nagi since you still went to different schools. You would go watch him practice and go to his games, he had even given you one of his jerseys to wear and he was strict about you wearing it to each match. You’d stay up on video chat with him as well and watch as he streamed his games for you when you were too tired to play with him yourself. 
As for Reo, there wasn’t any progress to be made there as the two of you were still virtually strangers but at least his scowling had  toned down. 
“I wanna see you more often,” Nagi said, his lips kissing the top of your hair as you hugged him bye at the end of practice. 
“We see each other nearly everyday, Nagi,” you laughed. However he did have a point since the majority of the day you were at different schools you only saw him in the evenings at the internet cafe, at his practice, or when he had games on the weekends. You were also busy studying a lot of the time as well and still not feeling comfortable enough to hang out with him and Reo who was often around. 
“Why don’t you stay over this weekend?” He asked but was trying to hide the shyness he felt from asking. 
“You mean like at your dorm?” You asked. 
“Yeah, why not?” He shrugged. 
You thought about it, you were so comfortable with him you didn’t have any objections and most of all Reo wouldn’t be there. 
“Sounds like a plan.” 
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“This is Choki,” Nagi said, motioning to a little cactus in a pot on his desk. You had your travel bag with you around your shoulder and had taken the metro to go to Nagi’s dorm in the late evening. 
He had met you at the stop and walked you back to his room. 
“It’s very cute,” you said. He was eye level with the cactus smiling at it. 
“He is very cute not it,” he replied defensively. 
“Yes he is cute,” you corrected, continuing to look around his room.
For a dorm room it was quite spacious but that was to be expected of the elite school. His bed was made and neat with a plush dinosaur throw blanket folded neatly on the comforter. He had a television in his room on a stand next to his desk where his PC was. His PC setup consisted of the rainbow keyboard and the koala plush and Choki next to it, and a gaming chair. He also had a mini fridge with a magnet holding up a photo of Reo and him that was taken on a Polaroid camera. Towards the entrance of the room there was a sink and mirror and the toilet was secluded in a cupboard-like closet separate from the full walk-in closet that held his clothes. The room was illuminated blue from the LED lights he had. 
“What do you think of my room?” He asked tentatively as he watched you inspect the place. 
“I like it. It seems very comfortable and clean,” you replied.
He let out a sigh of relief.
“Good because I cleaned it before you came over. I’m not a slob or anything but I can get disorganized because I procrastinate,” he explained. 
You nodded but felt yourself blushing as now the full prospect of being alone with him was setting in. 
“You wanna watch a movie?” He asked. 
“Sure,” you replied. 
He grabbed the remote and laid back on his bed, kicking off his shoes while doing so.
“You can lay down you know,” he teased watching as you stood there. You followed his lead and also took off your shoes, dropping your overnight bag on the floor and laid down next to him. Gently he brought you closer to him, wrapping his arms around you and kissing your hair. He flicked through movies on the streaming service.
“Do you have a preference?” He asked. 
“We can watch whatever,” you replied. He chuckled.
“You’re not helping here,” he teased but then settled on an animated movie about animals. He started the film and then put the remote down, his arms still holding and caressing you. 
“Is this okay? I want you to be comfortable with me,” he asked. You could hear the vulnerability in his question however and knew that it would hurt him if you didn’t want him to touch you. Fortunately, you did enjoy his comfort and warmth. He felt like a bear hug. 
“It’s okay I’m comfortable like this,” you assured him. 
You watched the movie intently but your heart still pounded in excitement from his closeness and you wondered if he could hear it.
He watched the movie as well, occasionally peppering kisses into your hair or chuckling when he found something funny. It was peaceful and not awkward in the slightest. You enjoyed this comfort only Nagi could bring. If it were any other guy you’d worry about his intentions but when Nagi said watch a movie and spend time with you he meant it, not trying anything else besides cuddling.
Towards the end of the movie you heard slight snoring and looking up you saw Nagi had fallen asleep. He looked more boyish when sleeping. You watched the rest of the movie and when it finished you turned the tv off. Nagi was still fast asleep but you didn’t mind, taking it as a sign that he felt comfortable around you. Ever so carefully you moved out of his arms and went to brush your teeth using his sink. You then used his walk in closet to change into your oversized tee and shorts for sleeping. When you came back you saw Nagi blinking in confusion from having woken up. 
“I thought you left,” he said sadly.
“No Nagi, I was just changing. You fell asleep towards the end of the movie.”
“Oh I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to,” he rushed to get his words out but you were quick to assure him.
“It’s okay, I thought it was sweet. I didn’t wanna wake you but I already brushed up for bed.”
He looked you up and down in your pajamas and his eyes softened. He repositioned himself so he was now laying in the bed underneath the sheets and blankets.
“Come snuggle with me. It felt so good having you in my arms.”
You obeyed his words and got into bed with him facing towards him. His  eyes looked at you lovingly.
“I love having you here. I got up early today to clean my room and make sure everything was perfect. That’s partly why I fell asleep but most of it was because of you. Cuddling you and smelling the nice scent of your hair was so relaxing.”
His way of declaring loving and saying things so openly with his childlike innocence was so endearing to you. Other guys were much more guarded and wouldn’t admit such things out of fear of vulnerability but Nagi just said what he always thought. 
“I love being here with you Nagi, you make me feel so safe,” you replied truthfully.
He pouted a little.
“You know you can call me baby or honey or anything you want,” he said. 
“Okay baby,” you said, giggling a bit. It was still new and felt a little strange coming out of your mouth. 
“Hey what’s funny?” He asked before adding: “you’re my baby and I’m yours and that’s that.”  He pulled you closer to him as you laughed.
“You’re right baby, you’re so needy,” you joked. 
He pouted again but it didn’t last long because he kissed you nice long and slow. He tasted so good like mint and just Nagi, his ocean breeze scent intermingling with the kiss. Your hands felt his soft white hair as you kissed and he moaned a little into your mouth. 
When your kiss broke you gazed at each other. 
“You mean everything to me,” he said, cupping your cheek. You curled up closer in his arms so he could snuggle you again how he had loved.
“You mean so much to me too,” you told him. He yawned.
“I wanna sleep with you again, it felt so good. This feels so good, but don’t get any ideas. I brushed my teeth before you got here,” he said. 
That made you belly laugh and swat him a little in laughter.
“What? It's true I always brush my teeth right before I see you. I want you to like me,” he said innocently.
“I do like you,” you said. In fact you were starting to think you more than liked him and as you both dozed off to sleep you heard him say the words you had been thinking out loud and it was the last thing you heard before being overtaken by sleep. 
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“I’ll be here waiting,” you told Nagi as he ran off towards the locker rooms to change for practice.
This morning you had woken up completely entangled and cuddled into him. His long legs had interlaced yours and after very prolonged kisses and cuddles you had gone out for miso soup for breakfast at a little restaurant nearby then returned to the high school campus for his practice. 
“I was almost starting to think he wasn’t gonna show up,” a voice said behind you. You turned around and Reo was standing behind you on the field already dressed in his uniform for practice.
“Reo, where did you come from?” You asked wondering how the two of you hadn’t noticed him on the way in.
He ignored your question and you felt small under his violet intense eyes. 
“You know Nagi is never late for practice. He’s usually here early with me,” he said in an accusatory tone. 
“Yeah sorry about that it’s just-“ you stammered but he cut you off.
“It’s just you were with Nagi last night and because of that he was thrown off routine this morning,” he finished for you. By now you felt yourself growing frustrated with him. You didn’t know him and he didn’t make any effort to know you, your only mutual connection was Nagi and he seemed hell bent on disliking you.
“Reo what is your problem with me?” You asked out of genuine curiosity and frustration.
He seemed more than happy to tell you.
“My problem is that ever since you’ve come into Nagi’s life he’s been changing. It all started with him wanting to spend more time at the internet cafe and when he told me it was because of some girl I knew it would become a problem,” he said. 
Nagi had been spending more time at the internet cafe not to play games but because he had wanted to see you? He had noticed you before he had even spoken to you and liked you? If it weren’t for this confrontation with Reo now you’d relish in that fact more.
“How is it a problem? We’re not doing anything wrong,” you said in an effort to defend yourself. 
“Maybe not, but Nagi isn’t like other guys, surely you’ve noticed that. He wears his heart on his sleeve and he’s a good guy. I don’t need you hurting him when he’s already changing for you,” he said.
“Changing how?” You said not fully understanding. 
“He’s more motivated. Before you I had to do everything for him because he thinks everything is a hassle. He showers after every game now because he knows you’re there waiting for him, he cleans his room because he knows you’re coming over, he does those things he normally wouldn’t wanna do because he has you in mind.” 
“Isn’t that a good thing?” You asked. 
Reo’s gaze was still sharp. 
“Maybe so but if you hurt him I’m worried he’s gonna be worse than before. Before he was just lazy after you hurt him he’ll just be unmotivated and depressed.” 
Your heart hurts at the thought. 
“I’m not gonna hurt him,” you said quietly. 
Reo didn’t seem convinced. 
“You and I both know that’s not how relationships work. Eventually you’ll hurt him and when you do I’ll never forgive you.” 
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GodOfSoccer: where did you go after practice? I thought you were gonna wait for me but Reo said you left early :( 
You saw the whisper message come through the game server as you loaded up the game to play. You had set your status to offline but Nagi was savvy enough to know when you were online. 
SleepyKoala: I didn’t feel good 
GodOfSoccer: do you need me to come over? i can take care of you 
SleepyKoala: No it’s okay 
GodOfSoccer: do you wanna play a few games? 
SleepyKoala: I think I just wanna play by myself 
GodOfSoccer: oh alright 
GodOfSoccer: good luck in your games :) 
GodOfSoccer went offline
You sighed as you watched him go offline and you knew you had hurt his feelings despite his good natured response. Nagi was never offline and he wasn’t the type to set his status to offline so you knew he was really not gonna play games tonight which didn’t bode well. You didn’t mean to hurt him, it's just you couldn’t get Reo’s words out of your head. He’d never forgive you if you hurt Nagi? You’d never forgive yourself. He was so good and sweet and pure and Reo was right that relationships were messy. Did you really want to be the one to give Nagi his first heartbreak? 
You tried to play a few games but it was futile, the game had grown stale without him. 
You logged off and crawled into bed. Soon it began to pour outside and it reflected your inner state. 
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The next two weeks were exam season so luckily you had an excuse to not be around Nagi as often. 
You stopped going to the internet cafe altogether and instead went to your school’s library to study. These days you only saw Nagi at his games and though he was understanding about it because he knew you had to study you could tell he was sad.
The two of you still texted at night but the conversation grew stale as Nagi wasn’t always the best texter and from your experience with him you knew that comfortable laid back atmosphere of being at peace with him was something text couldn’t capture. Text was made for talking and it forced this dynamic where it felt as if you always had to come up with something to say and often times the best moments with Nagi were just being able to enjoy each other’s presence. 
When you got home from school one afternoon you had noticed a bouquet of flowers waiting for you on the porch table. 
You had taken the flowers to your room and put them in a vase with water. You got your phone out to text him. 
You: Thanks for the flowers 
Nagi: you’re welcome. I know you’ve been working hard studying and I wanted you to have something to brighten up your desk. 
Your heart fluttered at his thoughtfulness and again you wondered why you were being so distant. You knew it wasn’t fair to him but what Reo said really got to you. You knew he was only looking out for his best friend but you were worried you were really going to be the one to hurt Nagi. 
Nagi: I miss you :( 
Nagi: Are you coming to my game tomorrow? 
You felt overwhelmed by it all. The flowers, his double texting, and all the while you still felt Reo’s disapproving eyes on you as if he were watching you now. Part of you thought maybe it was better to back out of things early on before they got any deeper. Maybe then Nagi wouldn’t be as hurt. It was that rationale that led to your reply:
You: Sorry I can’t. I have to study now more than ever. 
Nagi: oh okay
He didn’t say anything more after that. 
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When you woke up the next morning you had ten missed calls from an unsaved number. You also had text messages as well. You unlocked your phone in confusion. The messages read:
It’s Reo, are you awake? 
Nagi is hurt he got hurt at the game 
He’s been crying for you and wants you here
You instantly called the number back. 
“Reo what’s wrong? Where are you guys?” You asked, your panic and worry not giving you time to feel weird about calling him. 
“We’re headed to a nearby medcenter clinic that's across the school. You can meet us there,” he said then hung up. 
You raced outta bed and got dressed quickly. You didn’t bother to eat breakfast as all you could think about was how you hadn’t been there for Nagi. You were so worried and your heart hurt. 
The ride on the metro seemed obnoxiously long despite being the same as always. You anxiously tapped your fingers along your thighs the whole way there. 
At last you arrived and headed toward the clinic Reo had described. You felt nervous and shy as a nurse directed you to what room Nagi was in when you asked and told her you were his girlfriend. 
In front of his door you hesitated a little bit not knowing what to expect. How hurt was Nagi? Would he be upset with you for not being there for him? The only answers you’d get would be through that door. 
You pushed the door open slowly. 
Nagi was laying down in bed with his right ankle wrapped in med bandages and an ice pack against it. He perked up instantly when he saw you.
“Hey I knew you’d come,” he said. This wasn’t what you expected. He wasn't upset with you at all.
“Reo said you asked for me,” you said, noticing how the room was devoid of any purple. 
“I did. I needed my girl,” he said. His words tugged at your heartstrings as you walked closer to the bed so you were right beside him. 
“Where is Reo?” You asked. 
“He went to get us some food from the cafeteria and call my parents,” he said. You stroked his hair. 
“So how bad is it?” You asked. 
“Not too bad it’s just a sprained ankle but it hurt like hell when it happened. It should heal quickly,” he said. 
You nodded and stopped stroking his hair. 
“I’m sorry I wasn’t there when it happened,” you said. 
He shrugged but you could tell he was a little downcast even if he didn’t say it.
“It’s okay I know you’ve been busy,” he said. There was an awkward tension in the air that you knew was your doing. You were the one that had been distant lately. You just didn’t want to hurt him but it seems like you already were. 
“How long are you gonna be here?” You asked.
“Reo wants me to stay for a few days for some reason since he thinks I won’t take care of it but I told him I have you to take care of me,” he said beaming up at you his smile wavered when you didn’t react and added,”you will take care of me won’t you?” 
You wished he hadn’t asked that with his begging gray eyes that looked at you with the eagerness of a puppy.
“Nagi I’m just really busy right now, maybe Reo is right,” you said softly. His face fell.
“Why don’t you wanna be around me anymore? Am I doing something wrong? Am I spending too much time on soccer?” He asked. 
“No Nagi it’s not like that-“
“Bullshit. I know you have to study but you always did before and we were able to see each other. I’ve tried to be a good boyfriend and spend time with you by letting you stay over. I just don’t know what I did,” his voice almost broke. You reached for his hands but he pulled them away.
“Nagi, you didn’t do anything. I love being with you and spending time with you,” you said. He looked at you again, his eyes ever so stormy and sad.
“Then tell me the truth,” he pleaded. 
You swallowed, you'd tell him the truth but you didn’t want to make Reo look bad after all he was his best friend. 
“You remember the morning after I slept over and we went to your practice?” You started reluctantly.
“Yes,” he replied, understandably confused.
“Reo started talking to me and saying this stuff about how he’s scared I’ll hurt you. He told me how you’re already changing for me and taking initiative and doing things you normally wouldn’t like: showering after your games and waking up early to clean your room. He’s worried I’ll break your heart and you’ll be unmotivated and depressed.” 
There was silence for about a minute after you told him this. He was the first to break it.
“He really told you I didn’t shower after games before you?” He asked.
“I guess he kinda implied it,” you said wondering why he focused so much on that part. 
“Well that’s embarrassing,” he said with a wry smile before adding,”you don’t have to worry about hurting me.” He reached for your hand now and brought it up to his lips to kiss softly. 
“Why aren’t you more concerned about this? Reo is right. Relationships are messy and people get hurt and I don’t want to hurt you ever,” you said shivering at how his lips felt against your skin. 
“Reo is cynical. Yes people get hurt but I don’t wanna close myself off from you just because something may or may not happen.” He kept your hand laced in his and that’s how the two of you stood until Reo himself walked in a few moments later. He had two trays of sandwiches that he set down and seeing the state the two of you were in he asked: “Am I interrupting?”
“No Reo, I actually wanted to talk to you. Why have you been telling my girlfriend that she’s gonna hurt me?” Nagi asked in a conversational tone.
Reo glanced at you before looking back at Nagi.
“Nagi, you know everything I do is to protect you. I don’t want you getting hurt. You know how the girls at school are,” Reo replied. 
You didn’t understand this and looked curiously at Nagi but he ignored you.
“She’s not like that, she's nice to me and sweet and I need the two of you to get along otherwise you’re hurting me both,” he said firmly. 
At last you and Reo looked at each other, his last words resonating with both of you so there was no malice or ill will in the others eyes.
A nurse interrupted, coming in and saying she was going to change Nagi’s bandages to freshen them up before he left for the night and you and Reo were ushered into the hallway. 
“Thanks for coming,” Reo said genuinely once the door closed behind the two of you. 
“You’re welcome. I really care about him,” you said. 
“Yeah I can see that,” he said, running a hand through his hair that was loose out of its usual ponytail. 
“I didn’t mean to snitch on you or anything like that. I only told Nagi because he was asking why I was being so distant,” you said to him. He nodded in understanding. 
“No it’s fine I knew something was up when he was bumming around and blue because you weren’t around all of a sudden. It’s my fault,” he said. Now that he wasn’t looking at you with suspicion he seemed friendly and you could see why he got along with Nagi. 
“I know you were just trying to protect him since he’s your best friend,” you said.
“Still I shouldn’t have said anything to you like that or in that way. The last thing I wanted was for Nagi to be sad but I seemed to have caused it by you being distant. I've never seen him so down like that before.” His words made you feel guilty, after all you had only distanced yourself in order to not hurt him. 
“What did you mean by that comment about girls at your school?” You asked him. 
“Girls at school think Nagi is weird. Well, not just the girls but everyone does. He sticks to himself and he’s not concerned with impressing people the way everyone else is,” he said. 
You did know Nagi was a bit odd but he was endearing and now you knew why Reo was so protective of him. He was very attractive as well so you had truly thought he was joking when he had said that girls especially don’t talk to him. 
“Reo I wanna be able to get along. I don’t wanna stay away from Nagi because I care about him,” you said, deciding to call for a truce.
“Yeah that sounds good to me. I guess I  judged you unfairly and like Nagi said he wants us to be able to get along. It’s just always been him and me so I have to get used to it,” he said. 
You assured him you didn’t wanna ruin his and Nagi’s friendship and that of course they’d still be able to do the things they’ve always done. When the nurse came out of the room you both went back inside to find Nagi playing games on his phone in his typical fashion. 
You and Reo smiled at each other both knowing this was a sign he was recovering. 
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“I never said thank you,” Nagi said, stopping in his tracks as you both walked in the park.
It had been three weeks since his injury and he had recovered with you by his side. These walks with him had been a form of physical therapy but once he had healed they had stuck around as a routine thing for you two. 
“For what?” You asked. 
“For accepting being my girlfriend. I had liked you for a long time before I spoke to you and I was always too nervous to do so,” he said. He looked wonderful surrounded by the cherry blossoms of the trail you too were on. It had been his idea to go cherry blossom viewing with you and he had been looking forward to it for weeks even drawing a little blossom on your calendar for this date. 
“You’re welcome. Reo had told me about how you had started spending more time at the internet cafe because of me,” you said. A blush the color of the blossoms formed on his cheeks.
“The only downside to you and Reo being friends now is that he tells you all the embarrassing unfiltered things about me,” Nagi said but you could tell it meant a lot to him that you and Reo got along. 
In the weeks following Nagi’s injury you had stayed with him at his dorm and took care of him and Reo would come over in the evenings and all three of you would binge watch shows and movies you took turns picking. Of course you and Nagi continued to support Reo by watching him practice and coming to games as well while Nagi was healing. 
“I don’t think it’s embarrassing. It’s sweet you like me so much,” you said. 
He reached out to cup your face in his hands in the way he was so fond of doing. 
“I more than like you,” he said seriously before adding,”I know you were scared of hurting me but the truth is I’m not scared to be hurt if it’s by you. I wanna be with you always.” 
Your head was spinning at the way his eyes penetrated into yours. 
“I more than like you too,” you said shyly. He looks at you lovingly before leaning in to kiss you. 
When he pulls away he looks into your eyes and tells you those three words you had sworn you had heard before you had dozed off to sleep when you had slept over: “I love you.” 
This time as he kisses you again even though it feels like it, you know you’re not dreaming.
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leanned-too-hard · 7 months
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Nevermind I regret watching dnp now WHAT DO U MEAN I HAVE 18 YEARS OF LORE TO CATCH UP TO. Being a phannie is not even a job anymore its a full career plus retirement
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koluniie · 3 months
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Killer tries pick up lines on Dust(it doesn't work)
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gen loss dump part 2 :]
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i have a gen loss playlist so the last two was me hitting randomize and drawing a pic based on the song before it finished. the second one technically isn’t that cause charlie’s inferno isn’t on apple music cause they hate me so it’s way more of the song out of spite because they wouldn’t give it to me.
#spotify is prolly better (definitely is for finding playlists i use spotify to find playlists still and then add those songs to my own lmao#but dad pays for a family apple music subscription and free music streaming is infinitely better then paying for my own spotify#also my wound reference i feel like i let him off easy from the seven foot tall wire security monster#but idk this was drawn a year ago idk what i was doing#like i agree w the vest just being REALLLL bad bruising and internal stuff but i feel like he had wayyyy more open area besides that to get#fucked up besides just his arms#but i guess since the wire monster also got turned off by the button since it didn’t immediately go at ranboo next then maybe that’s still#reasonable idk#generation loss#generation loss fanart#ranboo fanart#continuing my not spamming tags trend so even though i bc puls have tagged all three of them im not gonna#still posting this primarily for me and for everyone else second#OH THE OUTFITS ARE FROM MY PIN BOARDS#I MAKE OUTFIT BOARDS FOR EVERYTHING ITS SO FUN#LIKE EVERY FANDOM IVE POSTED HERE HAS ONE#ITS BAD#and then irl i wear sweats and t shirt lmao#i found mouse trap game board earrings#i spend too much time on those finding highly specific bullshit#the jrwi one is especially cringe cause i have a different section for all of the what ifs#and that shit lasted one (1) episode#also the full color drawing i’m so >:| about it#i need to practice coloring sooooo badly but i always get frustrated w it#i need to slow tf down idk#but thats also from nearly a year ago so
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