#but then the dogs and other animals (things like snakes too)

[raspberry-gloaming]

I keep seeing videos online being like "back in my day we wanted toys and things that were popular and people around us also wanted for Christmas but now my kid wants trendy things and an Iphone 15"

and ive seen it phrased so many times that their idk 8 year old is like "I need the iPhone 15 for Christmas and I'm you bought me the iPhone 14 for my birthday but now that's old and crusty" and acting like wow my kid is so spoilt and bratty kids these days suck like - YOU ARE THE ONE WHO BOUGHT A KID THE IPHONE 14 FOR THEIR BIRTHDAY?! THEY'RE 8. YOURE DOING THIS!

They act like it's the kids fault when really they're growing up with access to things they really oughtened to, and some of the other things are just "my friend thinks it's cool and the rich kids at school have it so I want it" like you millenial parent didn't do the exact same thing just with other things. I hate that they're making fun of the kids due to their parenting choices.

[i-love-you-just-the-same]

this is entirely @tame-the-lion-writes fault for giving me brain worms lol

it really does start with kyle-- he's the bird, he can scope out the area the 141 are staying for the time being. what he doesn't expect is you, the pretty thing fixing up one of the cabins near them. he starts to hang around, becomes noticed by you (especially when he leaves you trinkets on the porch). johnny is next, he follows kyle to see where he goes when he disappears for hours. johnny plunges in faster than kyle. he's rumbling through drawers and sleeping in your blankets not too far along while kyle perches on your desk chair. you're receptive but hesitant. should wild animals be this friendly?

it gets more concerning when there's a bear rolling around in your front yard. he pushes your mailbox down--then back up once he realizes it's down. he sticks his head through your kitchen window and demands toast. price wants in, the best way for that is being as harmless as possible. so letting gaz perch on him and soap sleep on him (grumpily). eventually he's rewarded with head pats and cuddles in the living room (thankful for the wide door).

simon is much more reluctant. you can see him lurking, following you from afar, but he only ever gets close if you're in need of help. one time another big dog snarled at you and he attacked it. another time he led you away from a burrow of snakes. you see him with the fox, who plays with his tail and nimbles his haunches, but that's about it. he'll sleep on the porch when the other three are inside. you leave him scraps and let him be distant for awhile. it's a trust exercise to get him to be near you, so when he eventually comes to lay at the door to your room and allows soft touches to his ears, you take the win.

they're surprisingly helpful. ghost will bring you your shoes and gaz retrieves earrings. soap picks out blouses while price decides how cohesive the outfit is. they're good at online shopping and johnny will hide in your bag when you go to pick it up. they like to "find" money for you so you don't feel as bad dressing up more. gaz learns to braid with his beak while simon lays his head on your thigh.

they've managed to explain their nicknames of "gaz" (fridge letters), soap (lots of soap bars with teeth marks), "ghost" (a bed sheet and the way he acts), and "price" (money, lots of it, with help from the fridge letters).

they're not sure how to broach the "shifter" topic, so they don't for the time being. they take care of you in the ways they can, you bandage their paws and offer forehead kisses.

[littleheartsong]

Laios x fem or gn reader where she also enjoys monsters but she also enjoys animals (in the mentally ill way). Which leads to them always chatting about them, like chilchuck will be walking by and he'll hear that female hyenas have a penis. He just walks away thinking "what in the fucking fuck was that!?" I imagine they would also stay up late talking about monsters. :D

(↑The big little man learning that information)

i too am mentally ill about animals i could talk about biology for literal hours

laios/gn reader content: fluff. autism-to-autism conversation warnings: casual conversation about killing animals+monsters. mentions of animal genitalia. pretty normal!

"So... what's your favourite monster?"

The sudden question prompted Laios to look up from the delicious aroma of simmering kelpie, probably the one thing to take his attention away from food, while both Chilchuck and Marcille grimaced at what you'd just unleashed.

"My favourite monster?" Laios ponders the question as you nod in confirmation, "Well, Basilisks are pretty cool since they have two heads, though it's thought that the snake head is the actual head." 

"Really?"

"Yeah! Since it's cut in half, the snake head lives longer." His smile widens at your interest.

"I wonder what would happen if you cut a two-headed animal in half. Would one head live longer or would they both die at the same time?" You wonder while tilting your head.

Laios thinks about that for a second; it's a pretty good question! He's only seen two-headed calves in his village, and they didn't live long after birth.

"I think it depends on where it's cut since two-headed animals aren't supposed to have two heads and Basilisks are born that way," he concludes with a nod to cement his statement.

"That makes sense! It probably depends on the animal too; it would be harder for a larger animal like a calf to live longer than something smaller; like a snake," you say.

It appears Marcille has since lost her appetite and absconded from the area to avoid any more of this conversation and tucked into her bedroll, praying to whatever spirits can hear her you will stop soon. Chilchuck is more morbidly fascinated by what you two are talking about. He didn't even know animals could have two heads, and he hopes he never encounters one. Two-headed monsters are enough for him.

"No one can seem t' decide where th' 'ead begins n' ends," Senshi chimes in while preparing dinner.

"So are Basilisks your favourite then?" you ask Laios.

"Huh? Oh!" Laios perks up, reminded of the original question, "They're cool, but not my favourite," He taps his finger to his chin, once again in thought, "I'd have to say Wargs are my favourite," 

You smile at that." Wargs are so cute! They remind me of hyenas or bears, with their big, boxy heads and bulky bodies.

Laios is stunned for a moment; never in his whole life has he heard someone describe Wargs as 'cute'. He'd sooner describe them as 'cool' or 'ferocious'; does that mean you think bears and hyenas are cute too? He could understand bears. They look fluffy, though they also have those big claws. What other things do you think are cute?

"Yeah, they kind of are; they remind me a bit of my dogs back at my village," he says. "They also have really soft fur,"

"Wow! I wanna pet a Warg!" You clap your hands together in delight. "It'd probably bite my hand off, but it'd be worth it."

Warm laughter falls out of Laios' mouth before he can catch it. "Maybe we can find one and pet it together sometime."

Your face breaks into a grin as you sit closer to Laios. "Sounds like a plan! Hey, maybe they're really social, like hyenas."

Laios has to clear his throat, so anything he wants to say doesn't get stuck in there, as a flush rushes to his face. "I don't know that much about hyenas... I've only seen pictures."

That moment is when you really light up. "Oh! They're so cool! Especially spotted hyenas; they're the biggest ones, and they're also called bone-crushing hyenas since can break bones with their bites," and off you go.

"The females are larger than the males, and it's a matriarchal society too! So even the lowest-ranking female is still higher-ranked than the male. Even their penises are bigger!" 

Laios watches you share this information with wide, wondrous eyes. "Wait, their penises?"

"Oh, well, it's not a real penis," you correct yourself. "It's just the clitoris enlarged, but it pretty much acts like a real penis. They mate with it, pee through it, and even give birth with it!"

A pause

"... How does that work?" Laios asks.

"Well-

At that point, Chilchuck silently excuses himself to his own bedroll. He doesn't need to know the details. Birth is excruciating enough as is, but with a- no. No. He shakes his head to get rid of the terrible thought.

Senshi seems interested in listening, though.

[herballwitch]

Altars For The Greek Gods

Hello, My name is Alva Tauri! I am an herbalist, spirit worker, tarot and oracle reader, and lunar and herbal witch dedicated to closing the education gap when it comes to herbalism and witch practices!

Today, I wanted to talk about ways in which I connect with the Gods and deities I worship in my life via my altar, as well as some of those Greek gods that I do not have a direct connection with to help those who are just starting!

NOTE: I did already say this above but I am going to say it again, I only work with (as far as Greek gods go) Hades, Apollo, and Dionysus. However, I have been working with spirits, Gods, and deities for nine years now, so the information found in this post will be a compilation of everything I have learned in those nine years from my own experiences and the experiences of friends. If you have any information you feel should be added to this post please feel free to message me!

With that being said, let's get into altar work with Greek gods...

ARES

Ares is the God of war and the spirit of battle and was typically associated with:

ANIMALS: eagle owl, barn owl, poisonous snakes, boar, vulture

COLORS: red and purple

CRYSTALS: bloodstone, garnet, red jasper, smokey quartz, black tourmaline, hematite, metals, obsidian, carnelian

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): spicy things, chocolate, basil, cinnamon, weapons

ARTEMIS

Artemis was the goddess of chastity, hunting, and the moon. She is often associated with:

ANIMALS: deer, wolf, wild boar, hunting dogs

COLORS: white, blue, black, brown and green

CRYSTALS: morganite, moonstone, celestite, moss/tree agate, amethyst

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): anything moon shaped, frankincense, cypress, mugwort, amaranth

APHRODITE

Aphrodite is the ancient Greek goddess of sexual love and beauty. She is typically associate with:

ANIMALS: swan, dove, sparrow

COLORS: red and pink for love/sexuality. white and blue, and gold.

CRYSTALS: rose quartz, pearl, opal, aquamarine, rhodonite, ocean jasper, moonstone

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): roses, chocolate, shells, myrrh, gold

APOLLO

Apollo is the God of archery, music and dance, truth and prophecy, healing and diseases and, mostly commonly known as, the God of the Sun. He is commonly associated with:

ANIMALS: deer, hawk, crow/raven, cicada, swan, bees, wolf, fox

COLORS: yellow, white, red, orange. purple and green for the Oracle.

CRYSTALS: sunstone, amber, calcite (specifically honey and yellow), citrine, sapphire

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): sun shaped anything, bay leaves, laurel, cypress, playing music (especially the lyre), poetry

ATHENA

Athena was the goddess of wisdom, war, and the crafts and is normally associated with:

ANIMALS: snakes and owls

COLORS: white, grey/silver, red

CRYSTALS: metals, celestite, fluorite, bloodstone, obsidian, iolite, azurite, and lapis lazuli

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): anything to do with olives, snake shed, cedar, cypress, cinnamon, weapons

DEMETER

Demeter is the goddess of the harvest, grains, and agriculture. She is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: serpent, farm animals (especially pig), lizards, turtle-dove, crane, owl

COLORS: green, brown, yellow, and black

CRYSTALS: jade, tree/moss agate, carnelian, amber, aventurine, rutilated quartz, pyrope, and almandine

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): oats and grain, anything baked, flowers, spices (like cinnamon or cloves, allspice is good too), leaves that have begun to change colors for fall, mint, poppy

DIONYSUS

Dionysus is the God of wine, pleasure, and festivity and he is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: panther/leopard, tiger, bull, serpent

COLORS: purple and green for association with grapes/wine, leopard/tiger print for his holy animals

CRYSTALS: amethyst is largely associated with Dionysus, as well as grape agate, garnet, and rose or rutilated quartz

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): grapes (or any derivative), alcohol, cinnamon, ivy, pinecones, playing music, partying, sex/masturbation

HADES

Hades is the God of the underworld. However, Hades also rules over wealth and finances. He is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: naturally, dogs are frequently associated with Hades, as well as owls, sheep, and cattle

COLORS: black, red, and white are typically used in association with death. purple and metallics are used in association with riches/wealth

CRYSTALS: hematite, onyx, black crystals (like obsidian), jet

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): narcissus, mint, asphodel, white poplar, pomegranate, coffee, cinnamon, elm, money, chocolate, keys, shells

HEPHAESTUS

Hephaestus is the Greek god of fire, volcanoes, blacksmithing, and metalworking. He is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: donkey, dog, crane

COLORS: red, orange, and yellow, metallics.

CRYSTALS: metals, fire opal, honey calcite, smoky quartz, black quartz, rock crystal, amethyst, chloritized quartz, and rutilated quartz

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): spicy things, hot beverages, anything handmade (especially if made by you), dragon's blood incense, seashells, anything on fire

HERA

Hera is the goddess of women, marriage, and childbirth and is frequently associated with:

ANIMALS: peacock, cuckoo, cow

COLORS: red, pink and white for association with love and marriage. gold because she's the Queen of the Gods.

CRYSTALS: pearls, diamonds, topaz, opal, moonstone, malachite, tourmalinated quartz

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS: iris, rose, patchouli, coconut, cypress, maple, peacock feathers, pomegranate

HERMES

Hermes is the messenger of the gods and the mediator between the realm of the dead and the kingdom of the living. He is commonly associated with:

ANIMALS: tortoise, ram, goat, hawk, pig

COLORS: green, red, gold, white and brown

CRYSTALS: theres actually not a lot of evidance that crystals and stones were used in the past for altar work for Hermes. however citrine, alexandrite, and tigers eye are used frequently today

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): money, crocus/saffron, strawberries

HESTIA

Hestia is the goddess of the hearth, home, and hospitality. She is normally associated with:

ANIMALS: donkey, pig, crane, cow

COLORS: red, orange, and yellow, brown or white

CRYSTALS: amber, jade, red garnet, ruby, sunstone, amethyst, honey calcite

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): tea/coffee (drink with her), pine, bread, cider, apples, anything on fire, cinnamon, anything that feels like home to you

PERSEPHONE

Persephone is the goddess of the dead and queen of the underworld in ancient Greek religion and myth and is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: deer and ram

COLORS: purple, pink, yellow, green - any spring colors. (Hades colors can be used as well)

CRYSTALS: the garnet is the most commonly associated with Persephone, but amethyst, moss/tree agate, milk quartz, and jade can also be used

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): pomegranate, flowers, grains, lavender, rosemary, Spring

POSEIDEN

Poseidon is the god of the sea, earthquakes, horses, and water. He is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: horse, bull, dolphin, hippocampus

COLORS: blue and white, gray, brown and green

CRYSTALS: coral, opal (especially water opal), blue calcite, aquamarine

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): coffee, mint, ocean water, salt, seashells

ZEUS

Zeus is the god of the sky and is considered the ruler, protector, and father of all gods and humans. He is typically associated with:

ANIMALS: eagle, bull

COLORS: white, blue, gold, grey, yellow and black

CRYSTALS: opals are said to have come from Zeus' tears of joy after defeating the Titans, so they are heavily linked to Zeus. diamonds, gold, turquoise, lapis lazuli, celestite, iron/steel, any quartz

OTHER ASSOCIATIONS (good for offerings): rain water, oak, olives/olive branches/olive leaves, vervain. images of himself or anything with lightning bolts or shaped like a lighting bolt

That's all for altar connections with Greek Gods! I hope that you found this helpful in your spiritual journey and I hope that you are able to apply this information to your practice.

if you have any questions regarding anything discussed here or anything you feel that I have missed, please send an ask to my ask box! I appreciate all comments and questions!

For more information on my practice, witchcraft, herbalism, spirit work, and divination please check out the guide on my page (linked here)! Everything I have ever posted can be found there!

I wish you all a blessed day filled with peace, endless wealth, and eternal health! Until the next time we meet!

[imaslutforwritingshit]

Edward Cullen Imagine (XF!READER)

PART TWO

Warnings- smut, p in v, cunnilingus, faint jealousy (Jacob), passionate (lovey) sex

P.S I’ve actually never made smut where the characters actually loved each other😭 it’s mostly just desire. So this is actually kinda well written , just a foreword to the poetic shit she says.

Read PART ONE here ;)

I didn’t understand what he meant when he said that. I didn’t understand, until his cold fingers snakes down the bones of my hips, and he covered me with his strong body, like the crevices in my pelvic bone were made solely for his hands.

“You,” Edward strained, his voice gravely, unlike the normal smooth charisma he embodied. As he spoke in my ear, he pushed my shorts down with his thumbs, the cheeky underwear I had picked out this morning on a whim now on full display to him.

When Edward let his fingers graze the shape of my ass, his hand wavered on my skin, like every movement was delicate- and yet something he couldn’t contain. “You are making me lose myself. The way you sound, look, smell,” Edward inhaled sharply, grinding his hard cock across the sheer fabric of my underwear. The feeling sent shivers and tingles down the nerves of my stomach.

I wanted more. I’ve never wanted anything as much as I wanted this. His voice was amplifying my desire for him, each rough syllable a new jolt of electricity through my body.

Edward groaned as my panties rose up, his dick deeper in the planes of my ass. I could practically feel the veins of his body sliding on the skin of my ass cheeks.

He finished his sentence in a husky tone, each word getting harder for him to speak. “You make me want to do horrible things, Calypso. I want to be selfish with you. To you.” The lowness of his voice, if I didn’t know him as my boyfriend, would be straight up deadly- and terrifying.

My heart melted at the thought of Edward getting what he wanted, a strange mixture of lustful hormones and admiration for the words. Everything Edward has always been was good, and gentleman-like, and selfless.

So, yeah. I want him to be selfish. I want him to have what he wants, just for this evening.

I arched my back, pressing my entire ass against his erection. “I need you to be selfish, Edward. I want to see you lose control.”

Edward stopped moving for a second, breathing heavily over my body. I could feel his cock twitching on my underwear, and I bucked my hips backwards, urging him to keep going. He stopped my movement with a rough push on my hips, bringing my entire body to the cushion.

“Callie, Callie. I will never lose control.” he felt my body up, each grope electrifying my senses. “I desire ruining you. My body begs to. The amount of times I fantasized of killing you when I met you…You drive me insane, beautiful.” He paused, and I could almost feel a smile on his face. “But I’m not a dog. I wouldn’t eat you alive the first chance I get, for my own filthy benefit.” Edward bit his lip, tilting his head in a dangerously playful motion. “Unless, of course, you would prefer that. Canines?”

Realization dawned on me. Jacob. He was mocking me about Jacob. Where was this coming from?

“Edward, I don’t care about him. I want you.”

Edward draped his head by mine, the graceful stands of his hair falling on my cheek. “I don’t know why you enjoy that so much, Calypso. The thought of being weak. Under Jacob’s ruthless control.”

The words were true, but still irritating. I could only assume this fire of emotion was coming from his episode of lust, but my body was getting too many mixed emotions to understand how to feel about it.

Edward thumbed my panties now, sliding the strings down in a slow, taunting manner. “I know that animal would love to see you like that. Begging.” He snarled quietly at that, and took a quick breath as my underwear slid off my ass. “To see you asking him, pleading him to take control from you.”

I whimpered, a strange thrill coming from the anger in his voice. He was jealous- because he wanted me.

Maybe I’m sick for that having fueled my desire more.

But then again, maybe I’m sick for loving a vampire.

He kissed my shoulder blade, a soft contrast to the hardness of his words. “I’ve thought about tasting you for a long time.”

My blood.

A strange, unusual spike of fear entered my heart.

This was Edward. But he’s different now- fueled by emotions, unpredictable.

Is he gonna hurt me?

Edward kissed the small of my back, dragging his hands to my waist.

“I’ve thought about tasting you, Calypso. I just never said how.”

Edward grabbed my side, rolling me to be on my back. I stared at his eyes, animalistic and wild, blending in with the dark of the forest behind him.

“Spread your legs, my dove.”

My heart was pounding so fast, I could feel the pulse all over my body. Specifically throbbing in the area between my thighs, which I spread out per his orders.

Edward sucked in a breath in his teeth, the fangs in his mouth sticking out in a predatory manner. Only staring at my naked body, like the very sight was granting him vitality. He didn’t drop his frighteningly focused stare, and instead leaned over me, kissing my thighs. Each touch was tipping me over, teasing me in a painful way.

I remember what Edward had told me a month ago.

“So the lion fell in love with the lamb.”

I was indeed, a stupid lamb.

He grazed the skin below my stomach with his lips, tracing the lines of my hips with a trail of burning kisses. I was practically rocking my hips, a silent beg for more.

Edward pushed his cold, comforting hands on my hips again, forcing me down.

God, I could live in this moment forever.

This is my life now. He is my life now. I can’t see anything farther than this.

This is my past, my present, my future all encapsulated in one small, fleeting moment.

Edward stared at me, with intense, hot eyes, dragging on my breasts, my hips, and the slow trail to my clit. It would embarrass me- the heavy eye contact, with anyone else.

But Edward’s not like anyone else.

So I kept my gaze on him, as he kept his eyes on me, and let his warm tongue heat the area between my folds. I shivered from his godlike touch, unable to tear my eyes from the beautiful scene of his mouth on my body. He grasped my thighs harder, tracing circles with the perfect pressure on my clit.

As if he couldn’t control the quick movement, he snaked his tongue down to my wet opening, rolling movements inside of me. I mewled, gripping the sheets with white knuckles. My toes were already curling from the very idea of him touching me like this.

Edward bite down a little harder on the top of my pussy, licking my body like I was his last meal. Every touch was strategic, but am I surprised? He had 104 years of experience.

Orgasm was rising to my surface too quickly. I grabbed his hair, increasing the screaming thoughts of my mind, hoping he’ll understand. But the desire took over him- and he began flicking his wet tongue more, causing me to jerk my head backwards, clasping my thighs over his head.

“Please, Edward.” My gasps were filling the empty space, all of his movements sickeningly perfect.

He let go of me, the warm tongue exiting my folds, and I clenched my thighs together harder as he kneeled over me, his breath ragged and heavy. His lips were sleek with my fluid, and I felt my ears go red.

He was looking at me like I was the most beautiful thing to exist. He watched me, so intense that I could cower from his breathtaking gaze. Edward pulled his shirt over his head, the pale, shimmering color of his skin mesmerizing me.

The sun was out. Fading over the large pine trees of Forks- as if the universe had some perfectly divine idea of the first connection of our bodies.

His eyes were light brown in the sunlight, the lines of his abs sparkling in the warm orange of the sun.

“I’m crazy about you.” My confession was soft, so soft I wasn’t sure he heard it.

Edward slowly shook his head, but all I could focus on was the color of his eyes. It was the only thing tethering me from heaven.

He was a fallen angel, looking at me like I was the cure to his sin.

“Calypso. You are my destruction.” His breath quickened, his lean chest rising and falling with the pace of my own.

Edward’s mouth met mine one more time, one more soft, passionate time. I grazed my fingers over the muscles of his back, memorizing every part of this moment. Solidifying it in my nimble, mortal mind.

He let the tip of his dick slide on my wet pussy, staring at me with lustful eyes, eyes waiting for confirmation.

I nodded, biting my lip in preparation.

Edward let his thick shaft slide in my cunt, and I yelped, clenching his thick shoulders.

It hurt. His dick was so big, I was hardly prepared for it. But Edward, with the last remaining piece of willpower he had, slowed his movements, his hard body meeting the spongey, untouched area inside of me.

He hissed, dropping his body on mine, and he grazed his fingers through my hair, each thrust getting more powerful.

With that, I realized something.

Edward is a vampire.

A vampire with exceeding amounts of supernatural strength, and… stamina.

He showed no signs of reaching climax as he warmed my body with his cock, each stroke inside of me causing pleasure to shoot to my stomach.

I could faintly hear my reaction- unreal, loud moans that I assume the deers of the forest could hear. I mewled as he slowed down, pushing his forearms into the cushion. Edward let out a soft groan, stroking my face with his thumb. He repositioned his position, pushing his dick back in, and reaching new lengths of pleasure in my insides. I moaned, shamelessly, letting my fingers dig into his back.

The warm ball of nerves were heating at my core, a sign that I was reaching climax. Edward’s mouth dropped to my collarbones, sucking sharp hickeys as he thrusted inside of me, each movement rolling my eyes back.

I whimpered, stammering from the euphoria shaking my legs. “I’m-close…”

Edward moaned, a sound so beautiful I could’ve just watched him now, an artist and a masterpiece. He ground his hips to mine, hissing with the feeling of his body completely in mine. I let my hands fall over my head, closing my eyes to try to preserve the orgasm rising in my gut.

“No.” Edward’s voice was strained, the softness of his movements gone. Each thrust inside of me was hard, rough, matching his untainted desire. “Don’t close your eyes. I need to see you.”

I need to see you.

How could I love someone so much it hurt?

I opened my eyes weakly, meeting the heavy lidded, black pits of Edward’s. His abs clenched as he pushed inside of me, his hips bucking with a renounced speed. I gasped at the feeling of his dick hitting my cervix, trying to focus on his face, overwhelmed with pleasure.

“Please,” I begged one more time, the need for my climax forcing my legs to shake on his.

Edward managed a smile, and dropped his body again, fully covering mine. He rocked into me, and I whimpered in his ear, letting my hands drop over his neck.

Nothing has ever felt this good. Nothing will ever feel this good.

Edward groaned, the thrusts getting so hard it began to hurt again, with a strange, overwhelming pleasure that came with the pain.

“Callie…” His voice was soft for the jerk of his hips, a warm sensation rolling over my body.

“Edward!” I squirmed, peak taking over my nerves.

“I know, love.” Edward’s breaths were fast in my ear, the jerk of his hips creating the sounds of skin slapping throughout the room. He let a heavy groan slip from his lips, and I felt the leak of precum making the inside of my pussy even more liquid.

“I’m going to-” Edward’s voice was nothing more then a raspy groan in my ear.

“Please, please!” I whimpered again, clenching my legs around his abdomen to avoid the painful desire of climax. He had edged me on for so long, I don’t think I could’ve waited anymore.

Edward’s movements turned hard, fast, a ripple of sensation arousing my body again. He growled, our skin smacking together with new volume, and orgasm blinded my vision, making me roll my eyes back, and arch my back until my clit touched the root of his cock. I screamed, scraping my nails on his back until I could’ve been sure there was blood.

Edward didn’t protest; in fact, he thrust harder with that, each movement causing him to heave breaths, the warm air hitting my ear. He moaned, a vibration in the mess of my hair, and quickly pulled his warm, wet body from my own, shooting strings of hot white on the base of my stomach, dripping down my sensitive cunt.

Edward rolled off of me slowly, collapsing on the small couch, both of our bodies reeling the affects of the tiresome fuck. I attempted to catch my breath, feeling my heart beating so fast I couldn’t hear the birds chirping anymore. Hesitantly, I turned my body to meet his, but Edward was already staring at me, the warmth of his expression a relief to me. He bit his lip, his chest rising the similar pattern mine was.

I processed everything, opening my mouth to speak, but not understanding how to phrase it.

“Edward?”

He smiled, the soft, mesmerizing action in my peripheral. “Yes?” The melody of his voice still left me catching my breath.

I couldn’t say the words. They rung in my mind, an untamable message dancing through my heart.

Three words.

I love you.

Edward let his eyes fall on mine, hearing the silent plea of my mind.

“I love you too, Callie.” His mouth was parted, and his lips were red from before, and he read my mind and read those words. I couldn’t help it when I draped over his body, kissing him like it was the first time all over again.

He snaked his arms over my bare body, his smooth knuckles tickling my spine. His lips draped over mine as if we were two puzzle pieces, separated for too long, and now here, and alive, and in love.

I loved Edward Cullen. I had the very first day I met him. And even if I die a mortal, holding the hand of the boy who will exist forever, I know I’ll live until the day he ceases to.

I’ll live in Edward’s heart,

And he’ll live in mine.

Because that’s what love is, right? A taste of forever.

And we were forever.

Okay that’s it byeeee

I am super open to constructive criticism and feedback, as well as recs. Thanks for reading ! :> <333

[jaythes1mp]

Are you considering any other alternative animals? Because I think that Gotham would be more suitable, for example, an opossum hybrid Reader, if it means a pure law-abiding civilian or a raccoon/fox, for a more morally gray, but peaceful one (just ife is hard), or a badger and it would be a villain or antihero. Can you imagine the degree of comicality if someone catches Bats or Wayne with a real live badger, which they squeeze like a puppy, and meanwhile he behaves completely wildly and tries to bite off their hand? (except for Damien/Robin, he obviously and notoriously loves all non-human animals with unconditional love). Or a situation where the raccoon Reader helps Alfred wash the dishes? Or how the possum in a human body leaves some of its instincts and pretends to be dead when attacked by some villain (ideally, probably the Joker), that is, it really convincingly pretends like a real animal and deceives others, at least until it considers the situation safe, and the rest of the hostages are not so lucky (because it's a Joker)? (I think this would be the first meeting) If you need birds/flying/non-mammalian animals, I think of a pigeon, a crow and… I do not know what large birds of prey should be found in the geography of Gotham (and I did not name hybrid bats, because it is too obvious and it has already been mentioned in a couple of posts on this topic). And I would be a rat, whoever kept them as pets knows that they are just mini dogs. Of course, wild rats or passerines can be more aggressive than decorative ones, but this is rather due to their forced female survival. I use a translator because I don't know English so well and I don't have much free time for thoughtful translation. And I also had an anonymous smiley face, but I forgot it —.^,—

Thank you for the ask, anon!

I definitely have thought through some other animals, and will for sure write some one-shots and hc in the future if anyone asks for them. 

I’m open to making any and all kinds of hybrid readers.

So far I have a robin reader, a cat reader, and a puppy reader. 

I've been staying on the more common pet side of things, but the thought of a possum, opossum, badger, or raccoon reader is definitely an interesting concept. This is due to their wild and untamable nature in contrast to domesticated pets.

However I know jack shit about those animals so it wouldn’t be as detailed. Though I’d for sure attempt it. 

Because the idea of The Bruce Wayne, the wealthy philanthropist and Gotham City's golden boy, standing up at some random podium, trying to give a speech, with a rabid, hissing and scratching badger in his hands would definitely cause a large, hilarious commotion. 

Or even if the family attended one of those many fancy galas that they fund with this enormous, ferocious looking, sharp-taloned eagle perched on one of their shoulders. 

Or perhaps the family are attending a high-brow dinner, with a rat seated in the centre, one of those miniature harnesses wrapped around its form. The entire restaurant's attention drawn to the billionaire family and the rodent they’ve brought with them in a way that borders on being alienated. Because rats are usually chased out of a restaurant, not brought in and treated like royalty. But who's to go against the Wayne family?

Maybe the reader is a villain or anti-hero that the Gotham vigilantes are tasked to capture, in which they end up becoming unhealthily attached to, to the point where they can't have the reader in their human form without the chance of being recognised. So instead the Waynes/vigilantes are always seen with a snake wrapped snugly around their necks, torsos, thighs, or arms. Or a ferret tied safely to their utility belts, folded comfortably in their pockets, or peeking out from inside their shirts. Perhaps the reader can shift into a some form of sea water creature, like a seahorse, jellyfish, or octopus. Where in that case they never even get the chance to ever leave the estate, unlike how they would as a reptile or mammal. Trapped in a large enclosure, in the middle of the manor, designed to accommodate your species perfectly, for life.

[novy2sirius]

Vietnamese Astrology Traits

• Remember that enemy signs are still fatally attracted to one another but will not last in the long run and things between them could end badly. The matrix tries to set you up and leeches off your emotional energy which is why it sets you up for failure in some cases

• Your numerology is also important and may overpower some of your astrology traits. The negative traits will only apply if you’re at a lower vibration in life

Vietnamese Signs

The Rat: favored by the matrix, if anyone hurts them the matrix will come after them, intelligent when it comes to how they navigate life, adapts to surroundings quickly, most likely to gain wealth (second to the goat, pig, and cat trine), determined, lively, manipulative, will leave out parts of stories where they did something bad, greedy, stubborn, always nervous

The Ox/buffalo: grounded, often comedians, one of the least sexual signs unless they’re born under 1/5/9 energy, loyal, leaders, lots of willpower, strong, dependable, stubborn, blunt, gaslights a lot, can be violent, communicates poorly, too judgmental of others, petty

The Tiger: masculine, good health (unless numerology goes against this), sexiest sign, good fighters/strong, strong/muscular build/fitness model body, good at body building, go getters, smooth talkers, born leader, age gracefully, they have it the hardest in the usa (the usa was founded in their enemy sign year which is the year of the monkey), most likely to cheat (especially the men), childlike temper tantrums, know it alls, aggressive

The Cat: easily understands people/natural psychologist, observant, great designers, kind, creative, stealthy, quick witted, good chess players, third smartest sign, strong money maker, shouldn’t eat eggs or chicken, pessimistic, selfish, plays lots of mind games, often insecure

The Dragon: charismatic, adventurous, intelligent with the choices they make in life, sexy, energetic, powerful, confident, masculine, great fighters, bossy, rude, complicated at times, too demanding, arrogant

The Snake: wisest sign, intuitive, seductive, calm, second most influential/persuasive sign, observant, analytical, vengeful, best liars/manipulators, holds grudges, gets jealous easily

The Horse: very hard workers (workhorses), positive, animated, energetic, warm-hearted, has it the hardest in the matrix since its enemy sign is the rat (the sign the matrix favors), stubborn, superficial, self centered, impatient, impulsive, very delusional or in denial constantly

The Goat: most likely to gain wealth other than the rat (even more than its friend signs the cat and pig), the most good looking sign, most influential/persuasive sign, nurturing/caring, romantic/flirtatious, fun energy, go with the flow, usually into both spirituality and religion (they dabble into it all), funny, high maintenance, manipulative, lazy, has a hard life, lots of anxiety, gullible, emotionally sensitive/the softest sign, needs to constantly be pampered, shouldn’t be aggressive because it ends bad

The Monkey: smartest sign, popular, funniest sign, sociable, intuitive, brave, very curious, plays games with people, selfish, liars, egotistical, untrustworthy at times, always trying to get in others business

The Rooster: confident, humorous, loyal, one track minded, passionate, independent, observant, outgoing, talkative, narcissistic, control freak, bad temper/overly aggressive at times, hypocritical, picky

The Dog: very hard working, loves attention, loyal, honest, protective of the people they love, committed to the people they love, reliable, witty, helpful, overly aggressive, exaggerates stories, stubborn at times, always paranoid

The Pig: humble, strong money maker, responsible, luckiest sign, creative, classy, foodie/food lover, they love sex, tolerant, intelligent, friendly, easily influenced by others, promiscuous, overly materialistic, laziest sign, second most likely sign to cheat, naive, overly emotional, flaky

Vietnamese Elements

Metal: always looks out for loved ones, perseverant, independent, must create their own success, enjoys their freedom, enjoys comfort, stubborn, wants a romantic partner that they can control, too demanding at times, stubborn

Water: creative, intuitive, sensitive, adaptive, empathetic, sympathetic, gains others trust easily, likable, talkative, everyone feels special around them, tries to hard to make everyone around them feel happy which can lead to sadness, people follow their lead, influences others minds easily, passive aggressive, emotionally manipulative

Wood: optimistic, open minded, good at socializing, active, confident, organized, family oriented, good marriage partner, good friends/colleagues, gets attached quickly, always improving as a person, overworks themselves, passive aggressive, gullible

Fire: ambitious, determined, leader, strong, seductive, attracts people to them easily, enthusiastic, very giving in relationships, inspires others easily, affectionate, adventurous, competitive, optimistic, always stresses, impatient, gets mad quick

Earth: wise, patient, loyal, trustworthy, perfectionist, stable, always makes challenging sacrifices for others, good at giving advice, serious, goes based on logic rather than emotions, controlling

[yandere-sins]

the whole feral scary naga thing is good👀 but do you know of a legend when a white snake was about to be killed but someone saved them, in return they became the snake’s bride? the delusional naga not only making things worst for the reader by forcing them to be their mate, but now the village has no choice but to sacrifice y/n if they dont want to starve to death (nagas in some cultures are higly respected and are important for livelihood and crops)

Oh my gosh... This is perfect... (I have heard of the legend but haven't researched it but even so it's perfect >:3)

You pet dogs and pspsps at cats when you see them, smile at the cows, and oink alongside pigs. All that and more, but you're not necessarily involved with animals as much as other people in your village. You like animals, and you tolerate them around you, but the thing that actually gets you excited is plants. No wonder you became the town's doctor as one of the few people who can differentiate between poisonous berries and digestible flowers. You are an integral part of the community. Nothing could threaten your position as a respected member and being needed by everyone.

Nothing but the damn naga you stumbled upon one day.

There were stories of these creatures, as with every belief, there are countless creatures to know of in your culture. You heard them, acknowledged them, but didn't actually believe in them. Most stories are scars for children anyway, and half-human, half-snake? Sounds impossible for you as a doctor.

For years you roamed the forests for plants for your medicine and studies. Years of never meeting anything scarier than a wild cat or a completely normal but still somewhat scary big snake. Years of walking in and out of the forest unscathed and unharmed. But you are immediately alerted when a human voice calls out to you from a pitfall. You don't recognize the voice from your village, but as a doctor, it's your duty to help.

You do everything you can, from telling them that you're there for them and will get them out of the trap and patch them up once they're out, to cutting vines to make a rope and throw it down into the dark. The possibilities of what could be down there don't unsettle you. All you see is your mission to help. When you tell them to try climbing your makeshift rope, you still expect a human to appear from the very deep, very large pitfall. Oh, how wrong you are.

Because while at first, you see the right things like hands, shoulders, a head, and hair, nothing from the waist down is normal about the suspected human clawing its way out of the trap. But it's too late now to cut the vines as its tail slowly drags itself out of the hole, the proportions becoming uncanny on a body much too big for a human and the tail much too white and standing out to be of a snake.

The real horror, though, is when you meet the creature's eyes, slits for pupils that fixate on you, dilating and narrowing as it musters its savior, its nose sniffing the air while you feel like you're going to throw up as you notice the claws, scales, fangs. The unnaturalness of this monster in front of you.

You made a mistake. A big one. The pitfall was not a dangerous creation for a human by a human. It was a last effort to save humans and keep a monster locked away in a prison it couldn't escape. You released it—enthusiastically even. The desperation you feel, knowing you might have doomed your village, is immeasurable. You can already hear their screams echoing in your ears as they are torn limb from limb by this monster, all while you'll probably die first, unable to help them as they call for you to heal them.

Both of you are staring at each other for what feels like a breathless eternity until the creature slithers—slithers!—towards you, its claws reaching out while you close your eyes, unable to watch it go for the kill. Its arms wrap around your body, and you gasp as it buries its face in the space between your neck and shoulder, your heartbeat racing as you listen to it sniff loudly, deeply inhaling and exhaling through its mouth. A mix of a purr and growl reaches your ears, vibrating in its chest and making you shiver in its grasp as the creature declares you as "Mate" before picking you up, feet dangling so far from the ground you might break a leg if you fall.

Luckily, that's not the creature's intention, and it seems delighted by you clawing at its shoulders, trying to hold on to it out of fear as it begins to carry you away. It's then that you realize that no way can you let it take you somewhere deeper into the forest. You are needed in your village! You are important! Too good to be eaten somewhere even your bones cannot be found anymore! It's a little scary, but as the creature has to lower itself to slip under tree branches and the like, you take the risk, kicking its stomach when it least expects it to create enough distance between arm and body to slip out.

You never ran as fast and breathless in your life as you did with the naga right behind you, crashing into tree trunks and hissing and growling, its claws always dangerously close to your body. You knew the forest well, but the only thing this monster seemed to care about was getting to you. It was foolish to lead it back to your village, but maybe... maybe! The warriors were skilled! The elders might know where to hit its weak spots! There was at least some hope that you could escape it!

The naga only caught up to you when you stumbled into the open clearing where your village was settled. Gasps and screams echoed around you while your face slammed into the ground involuntarily as you two collided, your body collapsing from the run. You heard the calls for the warriors, the terrified screams of the women and children, but all of a sudden, everything becomes very nauseatingly quiet.

Even with the hand of the naga pressing you down into the ground, keeping you from running from it anymore, you somehow manage to look up. What you see is almost more terrifying than all the possible scenarios you could have imagined. Everyone—the warriors, women, children, elders—knelt on the ground before you, bowing their heads, foreheads touching the dirty ground while you heard the unsettling sounds of the creature behind you, hissing and thumping its tail.

"My mate!" it declares loudly, possessively, and the people shudder in reverent fear. Finally, the oldest member of the tribe lifts their head, nodding before answering, "All yours. We will not interfere."

Their eyes fall on you, their lips silently mouthing, "I'm sorry."

You are once again picked up, settled tightly against the naga's chest, enveloped like an inconsolable child in its arms before it turns. You have to watch the villagers slowly rise to their feet as the creature spares their life with your sacrifice. The eldest shakes their head, turning to a warrior before asking how the naga could possibly escape. "I don't know," sighs the warrior. "But that's one more doctor lost to these creatures. And we tried so hard to keep this one."

"Better them than us," the eldest comforts him, patting the warrior's shoulder. "We knew the trap wouldn't be able to keep the naga from what they want forever."

Tears brimming your eyes, you meet the disappointed gazes of the village you thought you were so important to. People who gave you away in a heartbeat to appease some monster, and the bitterness overwhelms you as you realize they knew it was coming. Coming for you of all people, never telling you to leave the village and run for your life. Instead, they used you for as long as they could.

Until you rescued your own death sentence.

[rip-cod-brainrot]

You know what would be funny? A little childish maybe, but funny?

A Lilo and Stitch kind of situation but instead of aliens… it’s shifters

Like, just imagine… I can’t decide between Makarov, Graves, and Valeria, so I’m gonna throw in all fucking three. Makarov is a wolf shifter, Graves is a hunting dog shifter, and Valeria is a cat shifter.

They’re running from the task force in animal forms, and as they’re trying to escape, they suddenly crash right into Reader, taking a walk in the middle of the night.

Of course Makarov and Graves end up bowling her over, they’re huge. Makarov and Valeria aren’t too inclined to give a shit, but Graves hangs back for just a second to check on Reader… and that gives the task force enough time to catch up.

They burst out onto the path, and immediately Graves and Makarov’s hackles raise, they’re baring their teeth… and the task force sees Reader having fallen on her bum, bewildered at the sight of four military men and two huge growling dogs.

Graves, however, instinctively steps between Reader and the task force. A guard dog is a guard dog, after all. Which gives Valeria an idea.

The growling is interrupted by a quiet meow, and a soft, warm weight pressing into Reader’s back. She turns around and…. Oh. Oh, a kitty! And she looks so scared….

Without even thinking, Reader scoops the kitty up onto her lap, trying to shush her. The movement grabs everyone’s attention.

Graves catches on quickly. The task force wouldn’t put a civilian at unnecessary risk…. And had to keep the existence of shifters secret. The task force couldn’t apprehend the trio if they were with Reader without revealing the truth…

So with a smug narrowing of his eyes, he steps back towards Reader, growling fiercely to ‘protect’ Reader from these strange military men….

And now the task force looks like the bad guys.

Adding a readmore cause it’s getting long and kind of a fic

The four soldiers are staring in shock as Valeria curls up into Reader’s lap, mewling for comfort like an infant. That little snake. If only Reader knew she was a cartel leader….

Gaz and Ghost start to raise their guns; they have the shot, they can take out Makarov at the very least…

But Price holds a hand out. “Hold your fire,” he insists as he lowers his weapon. His eyes are on Makarov… who is glaring back with cold, heartless eyes, his fangs inches from Reader’s neck as he stood right behind her….

They were at a standstill. Even taking Makarov out now was too dangerous; not only would his damned human corpse reveal the existence of shifters to Reader, but Makarov’s followers would be left with his image as a martyr. They would be left unchecked and wild, yet still as fervent in their belief of the cause.

No, they couldn’t shoot.

“Miss,” Price says as he steps forward, trying to ignore Graves’ growl. “Are you hurt?”

Reader looks up, her eyebrows tented. “I’m- n-no,” she stammers out. “What’s going on?…. Why do you have guns?”

Price only shakes his head. “I’m afraid that’s classified information, lass,” he says simply.

“It’s a military thing,” Soap jumps in, giving Reader a firm nod. “We can’t tell you.”

Reader blinked in surprise. “…. Does that mean it’s… dangerous here?” she asked slowly. “Should I go?”

The other three members of the task force lion to Price. He’s been in the game the longest, he’ll know what to do… right?

They see their captain hesitate, staring down Makarov over Reader’s shoulder. “…. You should,” he says eventually. “Are these your dogs?”

The question has Reader glancing between Makarov and Graves. “… well… no…”

Almost on instinct - panic, more like, he needed this to work out - Graves steps back to press against Reader’s side, shielding her as any guard dog would. Soap immediately raises his gun at the movement… which has Reader gasping.

“What are you doing!?”

“Lass, you need to get away from that dog-“

“He’s not doing anything!” Reader gets to her knees, putting a hand on Graves’ back. She uses the other arm to hold Valeria, who’s purring against her chest. “He’s not trying to attack me, he just thinks you guys are dangerous!”

That’s when it clicks for Makarov, the idea that Graves and Valeria are trying to pull off.

Honestly? He doesn’t want to do it, but… well.

Reader could make a good hostage, and it would give the trio enough time to plan a real escape, wouldn’t it?

So Makarov follows suite. He presses his shoulder against Reader’s back, his head over her arm as he glared coolly at the task force.

‘Your move.’

“Cap,” Gaz warns as he raises his gun, aiming at Makarov.

“I see it,” Price says, not even looking at Gaz. “Stand down.”

Soap’s eyes snapped to him. “Sir-“

“Stand down, Soap,” Price repeats. “… this is a misunderstanding.”

Ghost’s eyes narrow, but similar to Makarov, he realizes what Price is trying to pull off.

He relaxes his stance, pointing his gun down. “These three have been causing trouble all night,” Ghost said, his low, gruff accent taking Reader by surprise.

“They have,” Price nodded. “Do you know if they belong to anybody in the area, miss?”

Reader glanced between the three animals now surrounding her, shaking her head. “… no….?”

She suddenly squinted at them. “Wait- you guys were chasing two dogs and a cat with guns? What’s wrong with you?”

Soap and Gaz opened their mouths to protest, but Ghost held up his hand this time. “They distracted us from what we’re actually working on,” he said. “We had to chase them out of the area.”

“And on that note, you should also head home,” Price added. “It’s not safe out here. We’ll escort you back.”

Gaz and Soap relax at that, finally letting their weapons point down. They glare at the three shifters surrounding Reader, but they somewhat understand what’s going on now.

“We’ll make sure you get home safe,” Gaz says.

Reader looked between the four men before shrugging, starting to stand up. “Well… okay, if you say it’s that serious….”

But she doesn’t drop Valeria. She holds Valeria close, even wrapping the cat slightly in her jacket.

“What are you doing with the cat?” Ghost asks quietly, his eyes on Valeria.

“Oh, um….”

Reader looks between the cat and the two dogs - why was that black dog so big, - and pouts slightly.

“… Well, um…. If they’re causing you trouble…” she says quietly, “I can keep them at my place for the night. So they aren’t interfering with your… military business.”

She looks up to see the stern, concerned gazes of the task force. Her eyes widen, and she shakes her head, holding a hand out.

“I-I’ll look for their owners, yeah?” she said quickly. “Maybe they’re just… lost. But I can’t leave them running around all alone out here, and… and you have work to do! I can take care of them. Really!”

Price and Ghost give each other a quiet glance, a silent conversation between them. Valeria purrs in Reader’s arms with a smug smile on her face. Makarov casts a judgmental glare at Graves before turning his eyes back to the task force.

Oh, this was stupid… really stupid.

But for the task force, this meant that their three main enemies were now able to be monitored in one location. They wouldn’t let Reader get hurt.

And for the trio, this meant that they suddenly had a place where the task force couldn’t bother them… giving them enough time to plan a real escape.

The game is on.

[vicariousresearcher]

rn I just need to be held by Ghost. i need it to be post-mission where it was such a shit storm and there was so many close calls that the adrenaline crash getting back to base is bone-crushing. the kind where when you lay down in your bed you can feel your soul just melting out through your pores. constantly wondering if you had died out there would it have mattered? who would've cared? noticed? anyone aside from the team that relied on your abilities? you came back to this base again- not to a mother or a husband or friend or even a fucking cat. no, you came back to this base where you’re just another number in a nameless room. 

you know you’re not the only one who feels the pit in your lungs that slowly spreads its infection with each breath you take. it’s why Price is always out at the pub after a mission and why Gaz is always scratching for a new thing to spend the night with. all just trying to stave off that feeling that threatens to drown.

it’s how you find yourself in Ghosts room for the first time. 

You doesn’t even realize how touch-starved you are until you feel your throat close up even just in anticipation of it. the click of the door, a flick of the lights, thin laces unravelling between your fingers as you pull your boots all lighting up every nerve in his body. fight or flight igniting at the same time. barely dampened by the bone deep want to be touched.

neither of you quite able to sooth that need naturally. unable to just go out to the bar and find someone willing to smooth away the mission like how everyone else could. it was easier this way. you already knew and trusted each other. with a stranger, he’d have to spend just as much of the time disarming them as you would enjoying himself. 

doesn’t matter how dark the room is, you still hear that sharp hiss of air he sucked through his teeth when you settled down on the mattress next to him. part of you is wondering if he can hear your pulse pounding through your head.

two bodies squeezed into the small military-issued bed, scratchy blankets and all. and for the first time, you see Ghost hesitate. looking unsure. 

worried.

you have to tuck into him, one leg slotting between his and the other curled over his hip. his hands hovering above where they should go. paralyzed by the feeling of warmth against his body. 

his heart rabbits against his ribcage like a scared animal. a chained dog so used to its leash that once it’s unclipped and faced with freedom it freezes. as much as it hated that fucking yard there was comfort in its familiarity.  

this was not familiar.

it takes some time for his strung-up muscles to settle. hand cradling the back of your head. your hands snaking around his wide waist to slide under his shirt. scratching circles with your cracked nails.

the gentle rise and fall of your chest against his being so soothing it makes him wonder if this is what infants seek when they cling to their mothers.

You left your heart in his jaws you realize a bit too late. pulsing and oozing. soft. vulnerable in ways you abandoned in your childhood bedroom among the stuffed animals and stained carpet.

you doesn’t even know that he defanged himself as soon as you walked into his room. maw bloody and forgiving as his body lets out shaky breaths to accommodate the splintering gap in his chest

when was the last time you was touched like this? in a way that wasn’t clinical or corrective? willingly touched as a human rather than as an embodiment of training and skills? 

it's as scary as it is unpredictable. yet you and Ghost stay like that until morning. waking up to untangle limbs and shared, gooey viscera. 

you walk out of that room pretending to not know what it sounds like when his heart slows or what his hands feel like carding through your hair. 

just teammates when you walk out the door. strangers to each other's beds. 

until that itch to be held like you matter comes up again.

[thebirdart]

Some features of the earth urchins compared to the four hedgehogs of the world of Sonic!

One day I asked myself the question of how would be the anatomy of Sonic and I began to investigate the anatomy of the ground urchins but I liked so many details of them that I put together some characteristics of these animals to compare them with the four hedgehogs of the world of Sonic.

us start!

Starting with obvious facts:

In the world of Sonic only showed to have four hedgehogs; Sonic, Amy, Shadow and Silver, (the green does not count because it is still Sonic)

They all appear to be of a "same species of hedgehog".

For we know 16 types of earth urchins on our planet.

On the other hand I thought Silver was of a different species like Shadow. (By the shape of its spikes) But I don’t see the point, so they must be the same species. Although Shadow might be a little authentic in his design, I’ll explain later.

(Data: the hedgehog Atelerix algirus and the hedgehog Hemiechinus auritus are the ones who take care more to be pets at home)

FOOD

-Ground urchins eat insects, worms, molluscs, snakes, some fruits, small vertebrates, acorns, young birds and eggs.

(the hedgehog thought about it a little before attacking)

-Sonic and the others eat things that could be considered human; chili dogs, coffee beans (this is done by Shadow), strawberry cake (eaten by Amy and Sonic hates it), hamburgers (by SonicBoom), apples (by a drawing of Silver), and so on.

ANATOMY

The ground urchins have very good flexibility, an arched spine and strong and flexible muscles, that allows them to become ball. Comparing it with the deformed hedgehogs (Sonic) there is not much difference since all present good strength and flexibility, except Silver that can not be made ball.

The spikes of hedgehogs are made of keratin, which is a protein substance. I guess the same applies to Sonic and so on. Although in Sonic Unleashed when he is electrocuted we can see that it does not have "bones" in its large spikes, it is a little obvious to know but data that goes without saying.

The skeleton of ground urchins is similar to other mammals, only that its spine is a little more curved, as well as other details; as that its clavicle is well developed so that it can dig hard. This is very different from Sonic’s body and so on as it would resemble more a human structure.

Although also to keep in mind Sonic’s feet are… a closed thing…

By the way the snout and mouth are very different too. Sonic has a snout but the nose and mouth are different from the ground urchin. And another fact: the hedgehogs take incredibly long walks if it is for food; something like 7.2 km/h and if we combine it with the particularity of Sonic being very fast this powerful detail does not overlook.

Time when I jumped out of my spot when I was reading this.

I love this, I have no idea if the creator of Shadow has taken this as a reference but did you know that hedgehogs have a blue border that surrounds their dark eyes? This can only be seen when hedgehogs look to the side. So the great "eyeliner" of Shadow could be a real detail of the animal but taken as a reference to leave it beside your eyes on the outside.

The tail of the common hedgehogs is bare, but the tail of the deformed ones appears to be of the same color as all their other spikes.

I think, canonically, the characters of the Sonic world can mate. But I didn’t see anything that highlighted this, I mean, we can witness Cream’s mother.

Male hedgehogs have a small penis, (bulge), located in what would be their navel and have intra-abdominal testicles (they remain in the abdomen instead of leaving through the scrotum) and the female vulva is a small button that is located in front of the anus.

I guess since they’re characters from the '90s, it’s obvious that this wasn’t thought of at the time of their creation. There’s not much to think about since they’re characters who may or may not wear clothes (Tails-Nine and Sally-Amy) and yet we wouldn’t see anything, not even the nipples! Because hedgehogs have five nipples, both female and male, and you’ll notice that Sonic has nothing.

But I found a picture of Sally where she has more clothes. I suppose it must be a hallmark that female characters wear clothes. (Although Sally is not a canonical character, of course.)

THE 5 SENSES:

Sight: they do not have good view, it is said that hedgehogs have no sense of space, but they can distinguish shapes. Although the hedgehogs are blind and may have collisions with objects, they continue to travel great distances and this does not cause them to slow down, they continue with the same speed as if they had good eyesight.

Smell: very developed, so I guess the four hedgehogs can smell very well from several meters, maybe Sonic can smell Eggman without making noise, will smell of egg?

If you hid a chili dog under the ground in a box, Sonic could find it.

Hearing: the ear of hedgehogs can detect high frequency sounds, their developed sense allows them to locate their prey underground.

Tip: If you saw the Sonic Prime series you will notice that Sonic’s ears move often before a sound. I think a good detail added for the blue hedgehog, this is also added in the IDW comics, I did not find the panel but it is when Amy stays listening to the ground and knows that two hedgehogs are close, those hedgehogs were Shadow and Sonic.

But although hedgehogs have a very sensitive ear I do not consider it the same for the four hedgehogs as they would go crazy at the sounds of Eggman machines, explosions or a simple click of the computer mouse. (Ground urchins get stressed too fast with a simple computer click)

Taste: These animals have a peculiar… sense of taste. They like the taste of a hundred feet. So it’s not uncommon for Shadow to like bitter, for Sonic to like spicy, and for Amy to like sweet, what would Silver like? Healthy or the first thing he finds in his world to eat?

Types of sounds hedgehogs make

Sounds of joy: these little things purr like a cat, and they can even mix it with whistles. Could it be that Shadow purred when he was with Maria?

Bullying sounds: they emit a sound through the nose from a strong breathing, they do it when they feel attacked or are upset. (I don’t know if they thought of it this way when they made Shadow growl annoyingly in Sonic Prime. The same with Amy and Sonic when they got jealous or bothered with each other at Sonic Boom)

Whining sound: when they feel pain they emit a sound like a scream, I could notice this in a video of a hedgehog that was in the water of a bathtub. (although there are always exceptions)

Sleeping sounds: Hedgehogs snore, I guess they all snore too?Hedgehogs fall asleep anywhere. In the Sonic game where Amy’s birthday is celebrated, Tails mentions that Sonic can sleep anywhere, even in the most unusual.

Data: the hedgehogs have nails/claws that they use to dig the earth and since the of Sonic characters are put gloves to not show their hands I think they should not have pads like normal animals but rather human hands. Well, Sticks is the only one I’ve seen without gloves and she’s a badger and badgers have pads. So all Sonic characters should have hands without the characteristics of their species.

BEHAVIOR

The behavior of one ground urchin and the other four is very different, except Shadow, he should stay on the side of the ground urchins.

Since hedgehogs are solitary, they only come together when it’s mating season. (Although Sonic likes to spend time alone…but he’s not a lone wolf like Shadow)

UNGIMIENTO (I couldn’t find the word in English)

When tasting a taste or perceive a new smell, or rare, the animal bites the source of this flavor or smell (Animals, objects, people, whatever) to then make a frothy, thick and white drool that with the tongue are smeared on the side peaks and those near his face. (Scientists don’t know why they do this) If I imagine it for the four deformed hedgehogs maybe this does not exist for them, as they smell new things all the time.

EXTRA DATA: Hedgehogs can swim but they don’t like to stay in the water too long because they can drown, I saw a documentary that mentioned this. I like that touch they gave Sonic that in the water he is scary, I don’t know if it’s something canonical or fandom but it was nice to see him be the only one with a life jacket in the Olympics.

Remember when they did that twitter and tiktok special where they asked Sonic what would happen if he was a worm? Well, hedgehogs eat worms. And did you know that the Egyptian hedgehog is prey to foxes? While it’s another kind of hedgehog this is funny. In Sonic the movie the character Longclaw is the "mother" of Sonic… the funny thing about this is that she is an owl and owls eat hedgehogs.

Who had the idea to give a friend and mother predators to Sonic?

That’s all. I hope you liked these characteristics that I came up with. See you later!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Aita for joking about putting my cat in the soup?

🍲🐈⚫️so I can find later

I (20f) feel so fucking stupid for posting this. I have a pretty dark sense of humor (not the racist kinda dark humor though, to be clear. I’m a jackass but not *that* kind of jackass), and for the most part I keep things tame around my family (Yeah I live at home with my folks. Sue me. Rent is shit) but sometimes when I’m alone in the living room and my cat is there trying to crawl into my skin for cuddles, I’ll joke about preparing him for food in a silly baby talk voice. This usually isn’t a problem, except my sister (24f) came into the room at the wrong time while I was telling my cat how delicious he would be if I turned him into soup

She got upset and told me that it wasn’t funny and that if I actually hurt him she’s going to hurt me. Note that this woman is a giant baby who could easily be taken down by one punch to the stomach and barely leaves her computer except to harass whoever is leaving the house at any given time to buy her a coke. I don’t think I was doing anything wrong, nor am I going to hurt my cat. He’s an annoying little brat but he’s *my* annoying brat and I would never do anything to cause him harm

From my perspective, people are way too sensitive about putting cats and dogs on a pedestal and acting like they’re worth more than other animals. I didn’t say shit when my sister told me in full confidence that she thinks all bees and wasps should be killed and that all insects are inherently evil. She also told me that if I brought a snake into the house she’d kill it. I made a silly joke that my cat couldn’t even understand, and yet people make jokes about eating people’s pet chickens and pigs to their faces- in fact my sister has made that exact joke? What makes cats so special?

I genuinely don’t think I’m in the wrong here, but my sister insists that it’s not ok to tell the cat that he would taste good.

What are these acronyms?

[a-dinosaur-a-day]

Mammal bias is esp rampant in the pet community. I've had pet reptiles and spiders/tarantulas since I was about 10 and being told right to me face that the animals I cared for and cherished were gross and weird and some even "jokingly" staid they would gladly stomp on.

Nothing against dogs and cats but if you wouldn't say that about someone's dog or cat why would you say that to anyone who loves their pets?

Yup yup yup. Honestly, I've always known mammal bias was a thing, and when I majored in biology it was shoved down my throat, but I kind of figured its scope was limited or not really that damaging until I got my pet birds.

Apartments list themselves as pet friendly, but they only ever mean cats and dogs (and good luck trying to find ones that have other pets listed as okay online - same for temporary lodging)

Vets are usually only trained in cats and dogs, and it is impossible to find vets for other species close by - sometimes, at all - fish literally are done a major disservice alone

Homes and group living areas like townhouses, apartment buildings, etc. are not built with the safety of non-catdog pets in mind. How many have linked ventilation systems, which would endanger birds to emissions from other homes?

Service animals can only be dogs. Because dogs were literally bred to be our obedient servants. Never mind that other animals are more intelligent, and can also be trained. Just dogs.

Heck, cats and dogs even form a binary! Are you a cat lover or a dog lover? If you say neither, you get weird looks, and are accused of hating animals! Even though that's only two animals out of the billions!

And of course there's the death threats. Whether its someone threatening to kill someone's pet tarantula, to stomp on their snake, or eat their chicken, that just comes up again and again.

Cats and Dogs are elevated to essentially human status, because they are companion animals in our society and seen as part of the family. But no one can fathom that other pets are seen as family, too, that we'd like the same level of care and respect given to them.

like take this example: many people suggest eating non-cat/dog pets on the internet, and they're hardly ever called out or criticized. "It's just a joke!" and all that. Never mind these pets are beloved animals, and not actually a threat to anyone. Meanwhile, outdoor cats are actively causing ecological collapse. But if you suggest any form of aggressive population control - not of people's pets, of feral cats - you get called a monster. These aren't even beloved animals, just the *concept* of a cat is enough to make people lose their heads. this is a blatant double standard. an actively damaging double standard.

anyways if you want a non cat/dog pet remember to research vets and housing rules for your area before you accidentally screw yourself.

I would be remiss if I didn't add an afterthought that while small mammal pets and other mammals other than cats and dogs do have better vet treatment and some other benefits thanks to mammal bias, they often face similar struggles, and this hierarchy for pets really has cats and dogs on a pedestal lording over everyone else - including rabbits, hamsters, and especially mice and rats, and all other mammal pets as well as pets in other groups.

I hate cat-dog supremacy so much it sends me into a blind rage. Like, there isn't a 24-hr emergency vet for birds within three hours of me. I either have to drive that long or wait till my (hour away!) daytime vet opens up if I have an emergency. Birds can bleed out fast. This is just negligence. And there are so many animals, not only birds, that have been bred for captivity and rely on us. It is irresponsible and cruel that we designate them second-class pet...izens.

oof, you probably didn't expect this long of a ramble, I'll leave it off there.

[blood-grove]

//body horror, monster! 141 + reader , death, gn!reader

other; c/n = callsign

a/n: idk how the military works neither do igaf much also this story was not planned this was just something i needed to get out of my system do nto expect it to be good

Shapeshifter!Reader whos always since they were a kid felt itch that there skin was ready to shed and peel like a snake, Who always felt like there body wasn't right had to be perfect flaws and all because that was human.

But they weren't human, weren't hybrid either.

The first time they had ever shifted they were eleven there Father in one of his moods again taking it out on there poor mother.

Something inside them itched at that moment hearing her cries there old dog bite injury felt like it was on fire now as they itched and scratched at it till the skin gave way giving the breathing room for transformation.

The next time they open there eyes they were being kicked there Mother sobbing as she screamed.

Father laid dead mauled beyond recognition.

Did you do that?

Why was she screaming at you?

You were kicked into the foster system the next day narrowly avoiding Juvenile detention your mother had given her last bit of gratitude by explaining to the police that you were defending her you thought she'd praise you after the police left.

You were packing your clothes that night.

You got a DNA test when you arrived due to your mothers alibi to the police.

Human.

They figured it too your mother being clearly traumatized and you sudden violent act of self defense could have made her see anything at moment.

Still didnt explain the injuries that only a dog could cause.

You were 15 when you had a good grasp on what you were.

By 18 you were barely you anymore picked pieces from other peoples faces and bodies till you felt like you looked normal.

By 19 your mother had passed the news reached you slow and the grief went slower.

By 21 you've already been in the military for a while now, If that means with a new face and body each time some higher up sticks there nose into your business then so be it.

Shifting from human to human was easy the more you practiced it.

More harder things like non-humans and animals were doable but animals were getting easier and easier.

You've tried been a K9 once didnt work out for long.

You've had a few nice call signs.

Few you quickly forgot.

[c/s]

Thats been nice to be called recently.

Oh.

Right.

You should focus your meeting your new task force.

Right.

We should focus.

Woof.

Heh.

Its been a few days and wow these guys were something.

Did you mention they were monsters?

Not in a negative way of course.

But getting to know them while they were around base was nice.

Gaz you felt was the easier to get to know the harpy felt open, Talked about how they've never had a human on the team before.

Nice.

Threw Gaz you got to know Soap, You felt like the man was holding back the calm energy around him felt forced at times as the days past both of them seemed to get to know you better and you got to know them better as well.

As for the Captain and Lieutenant you were honestly nervous,

Price had a welcoming aura to him his voice gruff and firm you warmed up to him soon enoug.

Ghost?

You tried.

And shuffled away every time he looked at you.

He noticed.

He noticed?.

You eventually did warm up to Ghost!

You realized he wasn't glaring at you for once and tried to talk to him it was..awkward to many silences but it was a conversation.

So you and him were okay.

Were you okay now weeks later slowly making your place into the team?

No.

You were itching beyond belief this wasn't a good sign—

Actually you didn't even know what kind of sign this was.

You had all just gotten back from a particular rough mission a few more injuries than you all would like you got a few stitches in your arm and every since you could just feel them moving.

Being shifted around stubbornly as if they were a dam in a river.

You couldn't do that here.

You were in the confines of your own room but what if one of them walked in?

Would they report you?

Get you kicked for the military?

Maybe if you could just shift slightly enough to easy the unease under your skin.

The sound of cracking bone was sure to grab attention.

But surely you could just pass it off as stretching?

You could not pass it off as stretching and you were currently hiding in the rafters near sobbing.

Gaz had came in to check on you and caught you half shifted you panicked and lunged at him or the door you couldn't remember you were pretty sure one of your bones were jutting out of your skin as it readjusted into place.

You didn't hurt him.

You were just hoping you could calm yourself enough to shift into something smaller and run away shift into a new person new age try again at childhood maybe?

Maybe you panicking too much?

There also monsters they'd understand?

You didn't mean to lie about what you were.

You just.

The fear of the unknown paralyzed you to afraid of what'll happen what people will think.

You know you could be a threat.

Someone able to take face and shape of anyone?

You could understand if you were saw that way.

But you didn't want to be seen that way.

Every since your mother stared you down in fear not admiration not even shock.

Fear.

You knew you could never let someone look at you that way again.

Not someone you cared about.

Maybe if you hid away long enough they'd forget.

Memories fade.

Faces fade from recognition.

But that's all what you wished what have happened.

Now you were in a awkward stare off with Gaz not to subtly watched your arm pop and snap back into place along with your head.

"I see I should have knocked.."

"Yeah you should have."

A voice of not your own replied.

You hated when your body was out of sync.

You were using the wrong voice again, rearranging your own brain and vocal cords was odd.

Odder when one of your new teammates watched.

"Are- Are you okay?-"

"No" Ghost's voice replied.

"Oh..I-..Er..Do you..need a medic I.."

"No" Your own voice replied finally.

"Can you please leave..My ribs are still not in place and I doubt you'd want to see how that works."

He left.

Probably to tell Price rather then not wanting to see you basically play with your own rib cage like tuning a piano.

a/n; idk where this was going i did not plan this out i just wrote it on a whim

[comfortless]

sylly (like silly yk yk) what are your könig hcs? 🌹

SYLLY?! i…. Ok…. fair warning this is a little long… all that i do is think about this guy someone get him out of my head.

tread carefully reading this! there is a lot of sensitive content here: mental health stuff, abuse, mentions of sex and pornographic material, suicidal ideation, etc etc.

Generic, silly headcanons:

He prefers coffee (black) over tea, but he does have a bit of a sweet tooth (will never resist caramel if it’s presented to him). Honestly, he’s pretty self-reliant when it comes to food, too. On lazy days, he makes enough to where a takeout bill is hardly a concern, but for the most part he cooks! Not a chef by any means, but nothing he ever makes is bad!

Definitely wants a big, loving family, the polar opposite of what he had growing up as an only child in a far less than perfect household. Not a dealbreaker, but he does yearn for all of the love that he’s missed out on and then some.

Not big on video games, but… I do think he is absolutely spending every lonely leave playing Elder Scrolls. Would be so easy to convince to go larping or to a renfaire. I see everyone’s car/bike guy headcanons and I raise you… obsessed with fantasy König. He loves history and myth!! Why not combine the two and see him in chainmail.

The scent & kink posts. But to add… he’s an affectionate biter. (,: Knows the correct places to do so that won’t cause damage or hurt too terribly much. Likes to sniff you just as well! The embodiment of the “merge souls with me” post; in love, he just wants to feel you any way that he can and have some part of you lingering on him, even if it’s just a stray hair or your scent clinging to his shirt or pillowcase.

Cheating is never on this guy’s mind when he’s in a relationship. If he’s found a lady not running for the hills the second she catches sight of him, that’s his one and only. Sure, he may find himself attracted to someone else at some point or other during the duration of a relationship, but he’s devoted and disciplined! There’s never the fear of anyone coming in between he and his lover. He’ll spoil you with gifts, clingy to a point it’s overbearing, always giving you the utmost care… but is not opposed to bullying you into being a submissive, trembling mess either. He’s balanced!

Adores animals. Like any of them. There’s a special place in his heart for cats, but having a constant companion that he can take on hikes like a large dog would be ideal. Would definitely consider owning a tarantula or a snake, too. ^^ He isn’t scared of anything, let alone a creature that most are misinformed about… (he projects a little..). He would treat them just as well as anyone would treat a more “normal” pet. Understanding if you wouldn’t want to hold a giant arachnid (they’re delicate and you squirming over it would make him a bit protective over the poor thing. ): ), but it would mean a lot to him if you were more accepting.

König would not be a pretty sight (to most people) the majority of the time… I doubt that he takes care of himself past training his body and his allotted one-two minute military showers. His character description describes what is rumored to be under his mask as scary. Let him have his buzzcut, and scars, and teeth or old wounds a little too fucked up to fix! Unconventionally attractive is still attractive! (i think his ‘face reveal’ is actually so cute…)

Lots of sporadic little thoughts, but… Ambidextrous, can not ride a bike, whistles/hums to fill lapses of silence, flexes his fingers/cracks his knuckles when he’s nervous, definitely snores (loudly), brushes his teeth like 3-4 times a day (when he can) because he eats so much, not a picky eater at all, thinks it’s cute if you’re affectionately a little grossed out by him from time to time, absolutely the kind of person that thinks fuel and fire smell good, fluent in English and German but certainly knows many words and phrases from other languages.

Kind of clumsy. Overthinks the way his body looks to the point where sometimes his movements are a little stiff. Overestimates how tall a door frame may be if he’s distracted in the presence of others, hits his head and plays it off like he didn’t even notice. He’s (obviously) highly confident on the field, but in regular circumstances it’s totally reversed.

Though. Yeah. Sometimes this does translate onto the field. Can’t stay in one place for too long, once knocked an enemy soldier out by barreling into him. He’s a quick shot, skillful with any weapon that falls into his hands, but his focus can get a little skewed.

He collects some things. Nothing exactly pricy, but antique knives, coins, and a pocket watch or two. And he isn’t the most apt at putting things together in an appealing way… The first time you’re allowed into his house it looks like he’s robbed some vintage hunting shop/is planning something nefarious with the way he’s just got a few daggers strewn about his kitchen table. Just push them to the side, it’s fine! (His favorite is certainly one with a handle carved from a stag’s antler.)

Definitely takes a physical approach to bad feelings. @melancholic-thing mentioned to me that he bites himself when he’s feeling dejected or frustrated and yeah. (All of Ghost’s hcs for him are factually correct.) Not going to punch a hole through the wall but may aggressively slam a door or raise his voice before he can catch himself.

I have many thoughts about König’s childhood/early adulthood. Like, too many. But to summarize…

I think that everyone experiences bullying to an extent but what would make it so bad that it managed to make its way into the scraps that we do have of him? What made him so fundamentally unlikable to his peers? /: With my König I’ve settled on it being a blend of neurodivergency and a nightmare home life and alienation from his peers.

Height is predominantly viewed as a good trait. I don’t think it was necessarily his appearance at all that got him picked on so heavily (albeit… I do think that he would have had some scars, crooked teeth, regular facial bruising or cuts from scraps with other children/his father). Perhaps not the most conventionally attractive guy around, but normally viewed as a solid 5/10, just average. The kind of person who you wouldn’t remember from just a face alone.

His personality was always memorable though.

Whilst the other children/teenagers were interested in the regular trends, sports, whatever was shown on the television or heard on the radio at the time, I think he probably would have had a great interest in escapism!!

Comics, books, researching history and geography, etc, anything that could keep him from thinking of where he was/what other people viewed him as. He had a lot of strange things to say: odd facts (like the kind of person to tell you the longest word in the dictionary because he thinks it’s cool, “um actually—“ to correct something, monologuing about some bug you’ve just squashed and how it was not just a pest but very useful in nature, borderline concerning reactions to being shunned (feigned threats of violence that he would laugh off, things he’s probably heard from media and his own parents), over explaining himself for the simplest of misunderstandings, and… quoting his Oma’s very old-fashioned turns of phrase (think of little Kö regularly saying “Du gehst mir tierisch auf den Keks.” when he’s annoyed whereas the others say things far less dated like “Du gehst mir auf den Sack.”)

With him being difficult to relate to and having the most uncanny things slip out of his mouth, others probably did view him as a bit of a freak. He didn’t particularly stand up for himself often either apart from a few fights (and would never hit a girl). He would stay quiet, pretend to focus on his studies or whatever else was before him while the other children jeered and taunted. Regularly a target for fake confessions and offers to hang out outside of school, too.

König did have crushes, did have people he thought were cool and wanted to befriend, but after the third time of showing up someplace that he had to walk to on his own to find that no one had actually wanted to spend their time with him, he gave up.

I don’t think he had a good relationship with his parents or much of anyone. Seriously, leaving for the military at seventeen sets off a ton of alarm bells! He left the week of his Oma’s passing, because what else was there for him — no girlfriend, no prospects, hardly a relationship with his mother or father.

His father was your standard shit parent— womanizing, loud, physically abusive towards König. “Bonding” activities with him always had a heavy lean towards violence: hunting and arguing that usually resulted in fist fighting his own son seemed to be his favorites. A small man with an equally small ego— he probably would have boasted about his affairs to König, exposed him to pornography as a way of making sure his son wasn’t anything other than straight (which: never stopped his curiosity). He would never hold back from telling König that he would never in a million years find a girl willing to put up with his supposed stupidity and shortcomings. Generally just viewed his own son as utterly worthless if not for use as a punching bag.

In turn, König always loathed him, would dread hearing the bastard just walking around the house because he knew he would always find something to bicker with his wife or son over. Nothing that they ever did would be deemed correct, and his social anxiety initially developed from his dealings with him.

His mother was withdrawn, emotionally neglectful. König was just… there to her; another mouth to feed, another person begging for the attention she would have rather spared on herself.

She wasn’t a bad mother and she did try, but the product of dealing with his father’s nonsense + letting her own mental illness go unchecked (as in, his father controlled the family financially and why would he let her blow through their funds to see a therapist and “lose her lucidity with pills and ridiculous talks”). There were some days when she would be feeling more like herself and take König along with her for walks through the park where she would try to ask him about his life, about school, and… he would end up spilling his guts to her only for her to return to silence. Still, those were his favorite days. His fondest memory was picking a flower for her on one of those walks, one that she kept pressed and later framed.

There were never family dinners, no movie nights, no day trips or vacations. The most blissful of days were spent in the comfort of his room where he could keep the door locked and muffle the sounds of his parents arguing with loud music.

So, König did not have much of a safe space within his own home, but he had his Oma and her cluttered little house. She had books and plenty of food, even a cat, too. Though she was like his mother, stern and withdrawn, she would at least sit with him and tell him stories of her own life. She would at least tell him “Ich lieb dich, Käferchen!” in her quiet voice, stroke his head where he would sit with his nose buried in a book beside her. She would show him her dusty antiques, her old photographs, and in turn taught him to be a proper man by making him tend to what needed to be done around her house. And the garden. He loved his Oma’s garden, full of orchids, petunias, and tomatoes she would mash up to make him goulash or tomatensalat!

With Austria’s leading religion being Catholicism, I do think his Oma would have dragged him with her to service plenty, too. Not that he ever particularly enjoyed it… just zoned out with a plastic soldier in his pocket to fidget with or some trading card he spent the money he earned doing chores for her on. He’s never considered himself religious, thought himself to be bound for Hell no matter what, even if most of the time he felt that he was already there.

You take a puppy that’s been beaten down his entire life, but still remains eager and throw him in a barrack with people more horrible than any bully he’s ever had, though…? He starts taking his father’s advice more and more then. He wouldn’t harm anyone that he didn’t view as deserving of it, but it didn’t need to go that far that often, anyway. König is aware of the space he takes up by then, aware that all of his training has made him more broad and sturdy, and those playground fights are nothing compared to what he’s capable of now.

He gets his callsign from a quip about him owning nothing. His barrack is empty, devoid of pictures or any sentimental belongings. He rarely checks his phone, there might be the occasional missed call from a spam number, what is there to even see? He has no social media presence, every leave is spent in a shitty apartment only a days travel from his hometown, and he is utterly silent when the other soldiers invite him out for drinks. So yes, he’s a king. The king of absolutely nothing.

One of these rowdy boys does eventually coax him into talking to a woman. He loses his virginity in a disgusting bar bathroom, where he asks her after the two minutes he’s spent inside of her if it means anything to her at all. She laughs, washes herself in the sink and calms him down, but doesn’t give him her number or anything more than her first name.

He’s starved for love, utterly miserable without it, but doesn’t have much of a desire to seek it out, either. He’s seen how people are, how they treat him. But time and time again he will grapple onto any thread that may lead him to a pinhole of hope when it’s offered to him. For the most part, he has his hand and a perpetually almost-empty bottle of lotion.

And it’s not much of a surprise that König has contemplated suicide more times than he can count. It has never culminated in any way, only fearing that he would disappoint his men, even further disappoint his parents, maybe even a small part of him still believes in a Hell; that maybe with enough vigilantism on his part he’ll earn his way to a pleasant afterlife, one he teeters on the separation of believing in and not.

He doesn’t think about his mental health, always haunted by his father’s words, thinking that assuredly it would make him weak if he were to seek help for something like his own thoughts. So he overexerts himself during workouts, bottles everything other than rage and love inside: no one is going to see him cry, not ever again after being laughed at for him hundreds of times during school where he sat being called an “ugly giant” a “daydreaming freak” and an “idiot” near daily where silent tears did escape, only spurring further laughter.

Though I do not write him with these things in mind for every au, there are always subtle hints scattered about. ^^ I could probably prattle on forever about him, but I will leave you with this for now…

[livestock-and-bibles]

Things I've Noticed During My Several Rewatches of The Doomstar Requiem

(Lock in, this is gonna be long)

Murderface is the only one out of the group to have a completely obscured face, possession foreshadowing perhaps? Also he lacks the golden streaks on the halo-esque circles behind them. Inch resting... (Not gonna talk too much abt when the scene goes red and the beam behind Murderface is dripping blood because I believe it's already been talked about before by others, and I don't want to include anything in this post that's already been discussed) Also I love how all of their weapons match their instruments

The way Toki doesn't even flinch when he gets alcohol poured on his wound is heartbreaking, likely either because the torture his parents put him through as a kid has given him a wicked pain tolerance or because he's so dissociated, similarly to how he behaves in Dethfam when his parents are around or Dethzazz when he's mentally in the punishment hole (I do believe this sort of catatonic state he's in is what's causing him to seem so much worse off than Abigail—though his untreated diabetes + Magnus targeting him more because of his relation to Dethklok probably also adds to it—he's likely not really eating or taking care of himself)

At first I thought that Magnus was feeding them dog food, but on closer inspection I actually believe it to be human remains. Yeesh. You can see it really looks like muscle fibers, and there's bones, as well as skin that still has hair on it. Magnus Hammersmith they could never make me like you

On the table is the Klokateer from Tracking/Ishnifus and The Challenge!!

I think it's interesting how much Nathan's fantasies look like Toki's! I just think it's neat! They're more similar than they seem :)

This is the most expressive we've ever seen Charles and it makes my heart hurt AUUGHH

The way Nathan licks his lips/teeth after the "How can I be a hero when my dick's as big as a shoe" line. DISGUSTING /affectionate

Does this fan look familiar? He should, because it's Dethklok's son, Fatty Ding Dong!! Good to see he's doing well lol, and his real name is Rick, we can also assume that at LEAST four years have passed since season 1, since in season 1 episode 10, he's said to be 14. Since he has a roommate now, he is likely to be around 18 years old

(Apologies for the low quality screencap I had to nab this from Youtube) I kind of wish that the animators didn't change this original animation for the end of The Fans Are Chatting. I just feel like Nathan pushing away the Klokateers is more symbolically relevant. Nathan is quite literally pushing away the safety and security his avoidance has given him, the hologram disappearing and the fans leaving is a metaphor for the fact that he can no longer keep himself deluded into thinking that everything is fine, he can't hide from the truth anymore

Almost all of the Rock A Roonie Fantasy Camp counsellors came to the Dethklok audition, there's even the depressed blues guy in the background. There's also Sammy Candynose from Snakes 'n Barrels, so I like to think that Pickles told him about the auditions

There's also the guitarist from Get Thee Hence

Toki's shadow!!! The wings!!!

The animals they take the form of match two of the guitars Brendon Small created with Gibson, The Thunderhorse and the Snow Falcon :D

It's super tiny but their smiles :'))!!! Also the way their parts play on different sides when you listen with headphones but then combine at this part makes me so crazy. Not only does Toki challenge Skwisgaar and inspire him to get better, but they're also having fun! Which I can imagine never really happened when he played with Magnus

Probably just an animation error but Skwisgaar is animated as his present day self here. Idk, just thought that was interesting

I think the order of the rest of the band joining in on the background vocals is really interesting, it goes: Skwisgaar, Pickles, Nathan, Murderface. Personally I choose to interpret it as a representation of how long it took each member to warm up to Toki as their rhythm guitarist, Skwisgaar was super fast since he was the one to choose him, Pickles was the one wanting a new guitarist in the first place, Nathan and Magnus seemed to be close, so it would definitely take more time for him to accept Toki as the whole Magnus situation would still feel a little raw, and Murderface is a professional hater so of course it took him the longest

I really love just how soft and content Murderface looks in Toki's fantasy. We all know he has a softer side and I think that either Toki perceives it, or possibly Murderface shows it towards him (Which I can believe because they're often together and they get along pretty well, Toki is probably the person Murderface gets along with the best actually)

I also want to mention that at this part of I Believe, Toki is no longer singing along with the other's background vocals, and is harmonizing with himself, which gets really sad when you realize that it's because this was just Toki remembering this to keep himself sane and he's actually kidnapped, hurt, and alone. Ouch :(

The drunk driver who crashed into the Jomfru brothers is the same guy who crashed into Nathan's second grade class in Dethgov. I guess there's only one drunk driver that exists in the Metalocalypse universe lol

I think we as a fandom need to appreciate Eric Jomfru more. He's such a real one. The way they make you care about him after he's already gone is so evil lol /affectionate

The way the Klokateers join in on this song makes me wonder if perhaps they view each other as brothers, or if there's just like a strong sense of brotherhood between them

The groupie on the left can actually be seen in Fatherklok at the beginning of the episode, as one of the women Skwisgaar has been with, so y'know what? She has valid reasons to be mad honestly

Murderface's pose up top always sends me, sir please calm down, keep it together king

Murderface holding his wrist :(

If you look closely, you can actually see that the Revengeancers are eating Ishnifus. Which is just,, utterly horrifying

In between the shots of the band and the assassin, there's so many inconsistencies in the placement of the characters. For the last two images, I just like to rationalize it as Pickles immediately attempting to run away, then noticing that the rest of the band is still there and being like "Oh shit we're squaring up? Ok I guess". I know it's just so Nathan can be in the center when they use the Dethlights but I just think it's funny

Also in the second to last picture, the way Murderface, typically the most cowardly of the band, isn't looking at the assassin, but instead, is looking worriedly at Toki, makes my heart hurt. I adore their relationship

Murderface is actually sleeping in Nathan's bed here. If you compare different shots of their bedrooms and beds, it's clear that this is Nathan's, you can tell from the striped pillowcase. I'm not gonna talk too much about this, mostly because I want to make a separate post talking about how Murderface is seen more than once sleeping in Nathan's bed when he's hurt/unwell. It's very sweet lol

ANYWAY! Thanks for reading these rambles, I love The Doomstar Requiem so much! I might make a post like this for Army of the Doomstar as well, and also just some analysis posts if I get the confidence lol. Big thanks to @ratskal for watching this a dozen times with me and pointing out things too. (I actually reached the max limit of pictures allowed in a post which is a little funny, I am so normal about this show /lying)