#but then my mom texts me like “is that legal???” and I remember that I am not crazy it's residency training that's insane lol

[prince-liest]

Slowly but surely, I got some more writing today. I'm hoping that now that I'm getting used to the orientation schedule, I'll be able to finish at least another two chapters of Once Bitten in the next 2.5 weeks before orientation ends, because if not, then I probably won't be able to write during my EM-Peds rotation. I think ortho after that is "only" 50-60 hour weeks, so maybe then?

I dunno, it just feels really weird to know that I'm hitting that part of my training where inpatient rotations are going to be 72 hour weeks (12 hours a day, 6 days a week) and it's a genuinely relevant part of our orientation to be reminded that we have to let our attendings know if we're going to break the 80 hour workweek limits. We get lectures on wellness from admin people who have never worked more than a 40 hour week, and then the psych program director comes by and says, "Yeah, no, you guys are going to be unwell. You will get burned out, and when you meet all of the clinical criteria for depression and think that you need medication, here's my personal number. Call me with whatever you need, and I will also be able to tell you whether you're depressed or if it's residency," because that's the actual triage he can offer given that the problem with resident wellness isn't that we don't know how to take care of ourselves, it's that we're worked to the bone across the board.

Isn't it just wild that this is, like... considered normal?

Anyway, I know that I'll be able to handle it, I appreciate that the actual social culture of our program is full of nice people, and I'll get through it and it's temporary, etc, etc, but I just really want to finish Once Bitten before I get too tired to write for another extended period of time. I don't mind taking breaks from writing, but I like for my projects to be finished so they're not hanging out at the back of my mind. So that's my goal!

[todayisafridaynight]

ik a mention rgg nerfing ttm's features when modelin sawashiro every five minutes but they really had to cause aint no way in hell would a been intimated by this bruv if they didnt

[truckstoptigers]

sometimes i feel bad because i feel... angry w/ my youngest brother's mom. she's a much better mother to him than she was when she was still with our father, but i can't seem to forgive her. not when she almost backhanded my brother for accidentally spilling his toys and came within inches of doing the same to me because i darted in front of him when she raised her hand. not when i saw how absolutely abysmally she treated my brother because he's autistic (and so am i).

not when if it weren't for her, our father never would've gone to court & gotten custody in the first place, and i never would've been abused. he held me once when i was born & promptly fucked off after until i was four, and my brother's mom convinced him to take my mom to court. he signed away his rights on my big sister, and i was born just a year or two after her. he had no intention of being a father to any of us, and she found that out the hard way.

i hate her sometimes for being the one that actually convinced him to fight for custody. i can't help it. i kind of hate the judge that looked at his track record & somehow thought he was a worthy father that deserved time with the child he made explicitly clear he didn't want. she was not nice to me in the years that they were together. she screamed at me often if i did anything wrong/anything she just didn't like, & i got that from him too. i never once felt safe in that house.

she doesn't know what he did to me. she doesn't know how fucking lucky she is that he wasn't interested in my brother like that. i made sure the question never even came up. i wanted to be enough for him, because if i was, then nothing would happen to my littlest siblings on his side. she has no idea that he took so long to put me to bed every night i was there (mom got 80%, he got 20%) because he was raping me. sometimes he'd even sneak in a couple hours later just to wake me up and do it again.

all while she was just down the hall in the living room.

she was right there and she has no idea. i HOPE she has no idea. if she knew and didn't say anything, it'd kill me. at that point in time i wouldn't have put it past her to know & not tell anyone, especially my mom, about what he was doing to me. i wouldn't put it past his next girlfriend either, who gave me my little sister. i can only pray to a god i don't think i believe in that he didn't do the same to my little sister. it would kill me. but as far as i saw, he didn't try.

my brother & his mom live in kentucky now. she's with a much kinder man who loves my brother the way a father should and i couldn't be more grateful to him for that, even though i've never met the man. her relationship after our father was abusive, and even though i can't say i like her, i do firmly believe that she didn't deserve that. no one does. i have half a mind to think our father hit her too, because he hit me. i don't know. i'm just glad she and my brother are safe.

i don't think i can forgive her. i wish i could, but i can't find it in myself to do it. i remember too much. we were still living with her when he started trafficking me. didn't she think it was weird that he would always be driving me places & returning alone, often not leaving again for hours? didn't she wonder where i was? what did he tell her when she asked? DID she even ask?

did she care enough to ask?

[astrolook]

Mercury in the houses

(Where does your brain do the most damage? Let’s find out! 😆)

Mercury in the 1st House: "I Talk, Therefore I Am." 📝

Speaks like they’re in a debate competition—even when ordering coffee. ☕

When it comes to job/career, can succeed in anything requiring fast thinking, persuasion, or scamming people legally. (Lawyer, salesperson, journalist.)

Will text you a 3-paragraph explanation for why they took 5 minutes to reply. 📱

Probably debated with your siblings (if you have any) so much as a child they now have trust issues.

Flirts like it's a TED Talk—informative, persuasive, and slightly exhausting.

Looks like their pen was possessed by a demon mid-word. 👻

Your brain runs at 5G speed, but their mouth runs at 6G.

Mercury in the 2nd House: "Money Talks… and So Do I!"💰

Talks slow and calculated—like they’re charging per word.

For job/career, you are perfect for finance, business, or making passive-aggressive Etsy shops.

"Who owes me $15 from 2020? I remember."

Your Handwriting: Fancy-looking cursive that belongs on an expensive check. ✍️

If has family, you might have an Excel sheet of who spent what on Christmas gifts. 🎁

Watches finance YouTubers like they’re movies.

Mercury in the 3rd House: "I Have 1000 Thoughts Per Minute."

Can out-talk an auctioneer. Never. Shuts. Up. Talks so fast, even their Wi-Fi can’t keep up.

For job/career, you could do well as journalist, social media manager, or that one coworker who emails at 3 AM.

Chaotic bisexual, pansexual, or flirts for sport. 🏆

Handwriting: Could be unreadable. Like a doctor’s prescription.

Probably has 50 tabs opened at once.

ADHD? I've seen this placement with people who has mercury in 3rd house.

Mercury in the 4th House: "Let’s Overthink Our Childhood."📝

When they talk it sounds like a therapist even when giving food orders.

For job/career, anything home-based (Freelancer, therapist, professional nostalgic, home maker).

Writes long emotional texts and then deletes them.

They're the one that tells their sibling, "Mom always liked me better" or "You're adopted".

Handwriting: Cutesy and emotional—like a grandma’s love letter.

On their social media accounts, they posts sentimental throwbacks way too much.

Biggest Flaw: Lives in the past.

Mercury in the 5th House: "Flirting is My Second Language."📝

Flirty, dramatic, and annoyingly charming.

For job/career, anything creative—actor, writer, public speaker, meme creator.

Flirts with everyone, dates no one. Flirting in the comments section.

Was the funny but annoying child.

Can’t take anything seriously.

Mercury in the 6th House: "I think in bullet points."

If anyone asks them a question, it would sound like a Google search result.

For job/career, perfectionist boss (or their employee’s worst nightmare).

Too busy analyzing red flags to enjoy romance.

Handwriting: Neat, small, and borderline obsessive.

Leaves detailed Yelp reviews.

Mercury in the 7th House: "Let’s Discuss This… Again."📝

Speaks in "we" instead of "I" (even when they’re single).

For job/career, they are good at lawyer, diplomat, or customer service expert.

Always "the mediator" in sibling fights.

Plays marriage counselor to their parents.

Can’t be alone, but overthinks commitment.

Mercury in the 8th House: "Secrets? I Know Them All."📝

The way they talk: Low voice, deep words, big secrets.

For job/career, they're good at investigator, psychologist, hacker, or a blackmail expert.

In love, communicates in mystery and sexual tension.

Handwriting: Looks like a serial killer’s notes.

Leaves cryptic tweets.

Won’t admit their sexuality… but they are. Sometimes they could be straight, but a sibling could be gay.

Mercury in the 9th House: "I will talk your ear off about philosophy and conspiracy theories" 📝

Flirts by explaining history.

In love, turns deep convos into foreplay.

Probably thinks they’re smarter than their parents.

Posts long Reddit rants.

Handwriting: Could be messy, but big and confident.

For job/career, could excel at teacher, philosopher, or annoying podcast host.

Mercury in the 10th House: "I’m CEO of Overthinking My Career."📝

Talks like a LinkedIn post and takes life too seriously.

For job/career, could be a CEO, politician, or a corporate robot, lol.

Will literally schedule date nights.

Takes love as seriously as a business contract.

Will only befriend "useful people."

Mostly posts work-related updates.

Mercury in the 11th House: "I'm the human embodiment of a Reddit thread"📝

Speaks like they’re in a sci-fi movie.

Tech startup, social activist, or online troll.

In love, probably falls for their best friend.

Might like the idea of "open-minded" relationships.

The "black sheep" of the family.

Handwriting: Either it looks like it belongs on a protest sign or kinda bad.

Mercury in the 12th House: "Did I Say That Out Loud?"

Mumbles, forgets what they were saying.

Job/Career: Psychic, therapist, or mysterious writer. If writes, these people would write under a pen name.

Either super close to their siblings or never speaks to them.

Very much into horror, psychological thriller movies.

Handwriting: Looks like a haunted diary.

Terrible at explaining emotions but fantastic at writing it.

Mercury is where your brain lives, where your mouth runs, and where your Wi-Fi connection to reality glitches. 😆🌍✨

[deadsetobsessions]

Sea Cryptic! Danny AU- Pt. 7

[Pt.1] [Pt.2] [Pt.3] [Pt.4] [Pt.5] [Pt.6] [Pt.8] [Pt.9] [Pt.10]

“I’m having a child.”

Danny stared at Batman.

“…Uh, congrats?”

Batman whips out a stack of paper and a pen. “It’s you. Sign here and initial the highlighted spots.”

Danny instinctively, from years of dealing with Vlad, whacked the stack right out of Batman’s hands and into the bay. He doesn’t even feel bad about littering this time because, “Begone, fruitloop!”

Wait, no, that’s not what he meant.

“I mean- I have parents!”

“Not for long.” Batman muttered and then did a double take. “You have parents? How?”

Danny gasped, placing a hand on his chest to clutch his metaphorical pearls. He ignored Batman’s mutters. Everyone knows the vigilante has an adoption problem. At least, everyone who lived in Gotham did, as everyone who didn’t was somehow convinced that he “worked alone” or some bullshit like that. “Are you naturally this insensitive or were you dropped on your head as a baby? Obviously I had to come from somewhere.”

“They’re still… alive?”

“And kicking,” Danny said, inching away from yet another rich weird guy trying to adopt him. “Mostly the kicking part, though.” He said, remembering the sparring sessions. His mom could kick his as six ways to Sunday with nothing but jiu-jitsu and still have time to work in the lab.

“I see.”

“I’m charging you extra for the emotional upheaval. I have trauma regarding rich people trying to adopt me.”

Batman sullenly handed over a thousand.

“Sweet. There’s a group of shades down here asking if you could find their murderer. Apparently the serial killer is still at large.” Danny pointed.

“Of course. Tell me everything.”

The adoption papers disappeared as Batman went into detective mode.

Danny shoved the cash into his glowing chest and breathed a sigh of relief. He needed to make rent this month so it was a windfall running into Batman.

——

“Hey, Tim?”

Tim woke up from his Power Nap. “Huh?”

“Phantom’s complaining that Batman kept trying to adopt him.”

Tim blinked. “Uh.. what does that have to do with me?”

Danny stared at him, a patiently amused smile on his face. “Just in case the rumor about the Wayne’s sugar-daddy-into the Bats was a thing. Other than that, we might have to confront Batman to get him off of Phantom’s back. ”

“You… want to confront Batman.”

“Hey, man, Phantom’s a friend and it’s ride or die.” Danny snickered. It was literally die, with his Phantom side of things. He held two fists up, and wound them, like Popeye right after eating spinach or something. “And if Batman bothers Phantom, we ride at dawn.”

“Batman doesn’t come out unless it’s dark, though? Or for the Justice League.” Tim grinned. He mentally classified Danny under his “to go to” list. That’s where Bart, Bernard, Cassie, Kon, and Garfield were. If he starts shit, he could count on them to have his back and cause even more shit. Danny, wanting to fistfight Bruce over the man making Phantom uncomfortable? He absolutely is making that list.

“Then we ride at, like, dusk. Or uh, like 10PM. I gotta get my beauty sleep.”

“You’ll definitely need it,” Tim inconspicuously texted the group chat, which quickly blew up.

“Shut up,” Danny playfully shoved Tim. “Wait, can Batman even legally adopt? Isn’t being a vigilante illegal? And how can he adopt someone dead?”

Tim dramatically flailed and splayed over Danny’s carpeted living room. “Dunno about his identity,” he lied to Danny, like a liar. “But Gotham has a bunch of laws for the undead/restored to life people so there’s probably enough gray space there.”

Danny spluttered. “You guys have undead friendly laws?”

“Yeah, geht do you think Grundy just chills out? Plus, we have like a minor resurrection event every few years. It usually doesn’t stick but sometimes it does. Bruce pushed for those laws when Jason came back to life, except he doesn’t actually want people to know he’s like, alive.”

“Jason died?” Danny blinked. Well, that would explain the vibes. “Huh. So what’s up with his rank vibes then?”

“Rank vibes?” Tim pressed record on his phone.

Danny nodded. “Yeah, you know how Phantom’s got like a really chill green vibe?” Inwardly, Danny snickered at his pun. Chill. Yeah, he meant that very literally. “Jason’s got kind of a rank green vibe. He’s kind of stinky? Definitely never introduce him to Phantom.” Danny’s senses got worse in his ghost form.

“Jason regularly showers, though?!”

“Not smell! Like, a spiritual smell?”

“You can smell souls?!” Tim sat up. “Bro, you’re a meta?!”

“Uh.” Danny hesitated. “Yeah. I can smell souls. It’s a thing. Everyone from my town can do it.”

“What?!” Tim paused. “Wait, can Phantom smell souls?”

“Yeah. We’re, uh, from the same town.”

“Danny, what the fuck?”

“Hey, don’t look at me like that, you’re the one with a soul-sick brother! Not to mention, you’re kinda stinky too!”

“Hey!”

“Soul-stinky nerd man!”

——

“I stink?!” Jason spluttered out, extremely offended.

“The Lazarus pits. He’s most likely smelling traces of Lazarus pit on you, you imbecile.”

“We need to speak to Phantom. This instant.”

“I dunno, B. Danny sounded like he was gonna break your face if you bothered Phantom anymore.” Dick snickered.

“Yeah,” Tim chimed in, from his seat in front of the Bat-computer. “He was pretty serious.”

“Are we just gonna glaze over the fact that they’re from the same town?!” Stephanie exclaimed, practicing her moves on a training dummy.

“How does that even work? What does that mean? I thought Phantom was an immortal?” Duke asked.

“We also can’t rule out time-travel.” Barbara slammed her baton into a training dummy, twisting her wheelchair in an agile maneuver that left the dummy on the floor.

“No bothering Phantom.” Cass proclaimed.

“That’s quite right. You all have a warm dinner sitting above your cave and should it remain uneaten, I assure you that sherbet Sunday and crêpe Tuesday shall be canceled.” Alfred stepped in. The Bats, threatened, scrambled to ditch their gear and go upstairs.

[joelswritingmistress]

Neighbors with Benefits: Chapter 14 (Joel x reader)

Joel Miller x f!reader

Word Count: 2000

Your mother was busy getting all the side dishes ready for the picnic while your dad packed coolers of beer, soda and water outside and prepped the grill.

“I'll bring these out,” you offered, repeating what felt like a thousand times, “What else do you need?”

You knew your mother had a thousand things to say, and maybe a hundred questions after that. Still, she remained cordial and attempted to seem normal on the surface. You knew by her tightly wound mannerisms that she wasn't even close to portraying that - at least not to you. She might've fooled a coliseum full of people with her mask, but not you.

When everything was set up and less than an hour remained until guests began to arrive, you tried to excuse yourself.

“Okay, I’m going to shower.” You scampered toward the stairs but your mother called you back.

Fuck. You had almost gotten up the stairs, but without stalling made your way back to where your mom stood in the kitchen.

“Do you need any more help?” You tried to butter her up a bit by offering your aid and pressing on a smile, but your mother wasn't having it.

“You need to consider what you're doing, (Y/N),” she warned, “I'm saying it for your own good.”

“Okay,” you halfheartedly agreed.

“I mean it,” your mother went on. “I honestly don't know what other advice to give you. He’s a man. He's married.”

“He's not with Cecille,” you insisted, “Do you really think I'd get involved with a married man? I mean, I guess legally he is but they haven't lived together for awhile and they're getting a legal divorce.”

“You're twenty-three.”

“And I'm able to date who I want to date,” you said without trying to sound confrontational. “Mom, I know on the surface this looks bad. But I'm going to feel this out and see where it goes. If I get my heart broken, it's on me. I have feelings for Joel and he has feelings for me. I’ll deal with the consequences, whatever they might be.”

She stared at you for a long moment before saying quietly. “Okay.” Her white flag was waving and, if nothing else, she was done fighting you on it - for the moment.

A temporary victory. You knew this meant your mother wasn't going to tell your father; not yet. And so you silently thanked her with a closed-mouth smile and took the stairs to take a shower.

***

The picnic had dragged. You checked your phone again and again and again. Joel, you guessed, was refraining from being the one to initiate conversation. You couldn't blame him, and you hoped that was all it was - him being cautious.

What if it's over? You wondered. What if that's it? What if all this scared him off?

Your anxiety got the best of you and you wandered around the side of your house to text him. Your thumbs danced on the screen as you asked how his day was going, if he got in touch with Tommy and if later was still good to meet up.

You chewed on your thumbnail and rounded back into the picnic. It was much to your relief that Cecille hadn't shown up. As the hours ticked by you grew more hopeful that she wouldn't swing by. Still, seeing her car in the driveway next door made your insides twist with a concoction of feelings.

Ding! Your phone sounded off and your head was pulled down like a magnet toward the screen.

Text me a time, Joel texted back to you, remember how to get to the fishing spot?

You typed back without hesitation: Yes. I'll let you know when I'm done here.

All you wanted was to be back with. You wanted to take in his body language, hear his words. You wanted to know that despite what had happened that morning, that everything was alright.

You glanced around the backyard at the scene you would have typically enjoyed. There was a four on four volleyball game going on, two people were playing cornhole, others were talking and laughing around the tables you'd helped your parents set up. Regardless of the smiles, the music, the laughter and the sun shining down on everyone, your smiles were forced and fake.

By the time the last of the guests were waving goodbye, you couldn't wait any longer.

Seven o'clock? You typed to Joel, while helping your parents clean up.

You folded a table in half and began lugging it toward the open bay of the garage. When your phone pinged, you set the table down on the driveway so you could check it.

I'm addicted, you acknowledged. Fuck.

Being head over heels for someone was more than you bargained for. You truly felt addicted to Joel Miller.

I'll be waiting, Joel wrote back.

His words out more pep in your step, and you hurried to lug in the cornhole boards and a second table. Inside, you helped your mother wrap up some of the leftovers and wipe down the countertops before finally hurrying to retrieve your keys and a backpack you prepared.

“Are you going to be home tonight?” Your mother asked. She held your gaze and you shook your head.

“I don't think so “ you told her honestly, “But I'll let you know for sure.” She added, “Is that alright?”

“Like you said, you're twenty-three.” She shrugged. “You can do whatever you want.” Your mother turned toward the sink. “Be careful. And text me.”

“I love you.”

She turned and met your gaze. Despite her outward, quiet concern for the situation she said honestly. “I love you, too.”

On a completely opposite and oblivious note, your father high-fived you by the front door as he entered after putting some things in the garage.

“See ya later, kiddo!”

You smiled to yourself, relieved by his nonchalant demeanor. “See ya later, Dad. Love ya.”

“I love you, too.”

You were out the door a few seconds later, speeding off into the night to meet Joel at your secret location. You needed to see him in the worst way. Despite his agreement to meet, there was doubt that plagued the back of your mind.

What if, what if, what if…

Your foot hit the gas a little harder as you drove from back road to back road until the park came into view. You had to really think to remember a few of the last bends in the road but soon you recognized the wooded area that led down to the lake.

Where is he? Where is he?

Relief filled your core when you saw Joel’s truck in a small clearing. Your stomach filled with butterflies as you pulled up beside him. Joel turned from where he sat in the driver’s seat and he flung his door open almost immediately.

Oh, no, you thought. He has something to say.

Joel looked like a man on a mission. You prepared yourself for the worst. You prepared yourself for the heartache. The other shoe was about to drop. All of a sudden you were scared to get out of the car. Joel's face was too serious. If you just sat there then you wouldn't have to hear his let down.

Stop! You scolded yourself.

You popped open your door and let yourself as Joel rounded the front of your car.

Fuck, he looks good.

Joel was all you thought all about all day - not that that was anything new. He stared at you down with jeans a snug fitting white t-shirt. It hugged his rugged upper in all the right places and your former anxious thoughts were replaced far different ones.

“Hi,” you said to him, folding your hands in front of you.

Joel didn't immediately say anything. He appeared as if he was studying you. You were sure he was far better at it than you were.

He walked the rest of the way to you and you went to speak again.

“Joel, I-” You were cut off when he grabbed your face and kissed you firmly on the lips. You kissed him back, letting your guard down completely in his embrace. Almost immediately it grew heated. Your hands began to wander. He began to snake your shirt up over your head and before you knew it you were nearly naked in the bed of his truck with his body blanketing yours.

“Joel,” you finally choked out, “I want you.”

“I love you,” he voiced in a gruff whisper against your lips before devouring them once more.

“I love you,” you whimpered back. One of your legs hooked around his naked waist and Joel groaned into your mouth.

Everything about the moment was feral and raw and right. Being apart all day amidst the uncertainty and the angst made you needy for one another. As bad as you wanted Joel, you wondered if he wanted you more. It felt impossible, but the way he approached you that evening without even saying a word left you breathless.

Darkness had fully taken over the world when the two of you finished. Even long after your lovemaking was through, your lips touched, your hands explored one another and Joel kissed along your collarbone, neck and shoulders.

Being out in nature completely nude and basking in the afterglow of perhaps the most tender, emotional sex you had ever had was an experience you wouldn't soon forget.

“I was afraid you were going to break things off with me,” you said quietly, kissing Joel’s neck as he closed his eyes beside you.

“I could never do that.”

“Never?” You let your teeth graze his neck as you continued to kiss him there.

“Mmm..” Joel moaned out loud, “Never.”

Laying face-to-face you linked your arm up under his and rested your palm on his shoulder blade. You pulled him close and kissed him. There was no getting enough of Joel. You slipped your tongue past his lips and he eagerly reciprocated. As you made out you felt him harden again against your upper thigh.

“I want you again,” you practically begged, pulling him closer. “Please.” Your hand drifted down to his lower back and Joel rolled his body back on top of yours with your encouragement.

His kiss was smoldering. You pawed your arms around him and tangled a hand in his thick, dark hair. When Joel’s lips parted from yours he kissed down your neck to the tops of your breasts before separating himself from you.

“No,” you begged, pulling him back with a smile as your teeth caught your bottom lip.

Joel satisfied you with a sloppy, closed-mouth kiss. “I'm just reaching inside for some blankets,” he explained, whispering against your lips. Joel pried open the back window on his truck and grabbed a small stack of blankets from the back seat.

You adjusted so he could place a few down on the truck bed and then laid back down flat and pulled him back to you.

Your bodies connected immediately as his lips crashed back against yours. When your lips finally parted to take a breath, you gasped out the words, “Don't leave me.”

Why was this such a problem for you? Even Joel, himself, saying he would never leave wasn't convincing enough. You were too deep into it emotionally and it was making you a wreck inside.

Joel, patient as ever, brought his lips to your ear. “You're mine.” His teeth latched onto your ear lobe and he swirled his tongue around the area. “All mine.”

Your head dropped back in pleasure and you dug your fingers into his back.

New kink unlocked.

CLICK HERE FOR NEXT CHAPTER

@mellymbee @pedropascal111 @axshadows @mybritishstyle @untamedheart81 @amyispxnk @goodvibesonly421 @cosmic006533-blog @ashleyfilm @maybetomorrowgirl @rebeccawinters @cuteanimalmama @vickie5446 @writlingerz @drewharrisonwriter @churchofjoemiller

[marnerparty]

go blue pt. 3

Maybe i’ll start posting more!? pt. 3 back by popular demand!

Luke Hughes x McCarthy!reader

*for those who do not know, JJ McCarthy is the quarterback for Michigan's football team, so yn will be his sister!

part 1 here! part 2 here!

ynmccarthy

Liked by trevorzegras, yourbestfriend and 67,009 others

ynmccarthy t- 14 days until I'm a Hughes !?

View all 567 comments

yourbestfriend bestie boutta be a WIFE

ynmccarthy wifey era incoming

lhughes_06 I cannot wait

_quinnhughes my main man Beau

ynmccarthy I swear he doesn't walk as good with anyone but you

_quinnhughes I have that effect

jackhughes weird

jamie.drysdale omg I'm so nervous for you

ynmccarthy jamie! wtf

biznasty my invite get lost?

ynmccarthy trevor zegras.

trevorzegras ma'am

ynmccarthy where's biz's invitation

trevorzegras hmmmmmm

biznasty the little shit just texted me trying to ask me to make it seem like I'm crazy

trevorzegras do i have any friends?

ynmccarthy biz, you're invited. please come

lhughes_06 preferably with a good gift?

ynmccarthy Jesus.

elblue6 I can't wait! ❤️

ynmccarthy love you mama Hughes!

lukehughesfan that's my man

rutgermcgroarty how is Luke getting married

lhughes_06 I ask myself that everyday

jackhughes you ask yourself that because yn is out of your league. we ask ourselves that because you're immature

rutgermcgroarty precisely

lhughes_06 okay, ouch???

hater1 yn is ugly.

ynmccarthy you're right

jamie.drysdale oooh my favorite show is on!

nicohischier can't wait to party!

ynmccarthy oh we are turning UP

jackhughes NO

dawson1417 NO

ynmccarthy ????

trevorzegras do you remember anything when you drink

ynmccarthy evidently not

nicohischier what did i do

dawson1417 you guys destroy everything in your path when you're drunk together

ynmccarthy stop bullying the bride to be

jjmccarthy not too late to back out btw

ynmccarthy ????

lhughes_06 didn't we talk about this?

ynmccarthy ??????????

jjmccarthy Luke could always have me. just saying

fan1 I'm obsessed with Luke & YN

Liked by ynmccarthy

trevorzegras wait ... didn't you guys get eloped

lhughes_06 there may have been an issue with the marriage certificate afterwards

ynmccarthy aka Luke misspelled HUGHES

trevorzegras tell me that's a lie

ynmccarthy legally for 2 days I was YN Huge

_quinnhughes he forgot 2 LETTERS!?

lhughes_06 my handwriting was up for interpretation

lhughes_06

Liked by jackhughes, dawson1417 and 77,334 others

lhughes_06 big hickey guy

Comments on this post have been limited

jackhughes oh Lukey boy

markestapa and the dumbest Hughes award goes to ...

devilsfan poor luke

jamie.drysdale yn is the world's greatest support

ynmccarthy thanks jim jam!!

jamie.drysdale my game next?

ynmccarthy dont push it 😑

jamie.drysdale do you even love me anymore

rutgermcgroarty Luke a freak

lhughes_06 what is everyone on about

biznasty get this boy an editor

fan#1 no wonder she's marrying him

njdevils 😳

yns#1fan wedding ready

trevorzegras we really never figured out who this is?

rutgermgroarty my money's on fantilli

adamfantilli its mackie

mackie.samo its rutger

nhl feels like this should be on the secret account

Liked by ynmccarthy

elblue6 oh my

lhughes_06 not you too mom??

_quinnhughes you'll be embarrassed later kid

trevorzegras put him out of his misery someone

lhughes_06 you maybe????

trevorzegras nah

yourbestfriend wait until yn sees this

ynmccarthy maybe limit the comments on this post babe

lhughes_06 what the hell am I missing

ynmccarthy I'll let you figure it out

fan#2 Luke always been fine

ynmccarthy facts

lhughes_06 HOCKEY! HOCKEY! HOCKEY! I MEANT HOCKEY!

ynssecretaccount

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ynssecretaccount big hickey girl???

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jamie.drysdale MY EYES

jamie.drysdale HOW COULD YOU

jamie.drysdale I'M TOO BABY FOR THIS

ynssecretaccount your punishment for leaving us for Philadelphia

trevorzegras who's us?

masonmctavish23 you're not included yn

ynssecretaccount im an honorary duck?

jamie.drysdale will I ever live this down

trevorzegras nope

masonmctavish23 nah

ynssecretaccount come back?

lhughes_06 you're kidding.

ynssecretaccount have I said how much I love you lately?

lhughes_06 no.

ynssecretaccount I'm marrying you

trevorzegras vintage yn is back

ynssecretaccount thank you for appreciating it

jjmccarthy ew. brother here?

jackhughes and here

_quinnhughes and here

ynssecretaccount you guys have never given or received a hickey ... right

edwards.73 I've missed this account

ynssecretaccount i've missed YOU

yourbestfriend no babies

ynssecretaccount you can't make babies from kissing

yourbestfriend kissing leads to touching, and touching leads to babies

jackhughes seriously, no one needed this

jackhughes I do enjoy the making fun of Luke part

ynssecretaccount I try, I try

_quinnhughes doors OPEN from now on

ynssecretaccount we have our own home?

_quinnhughes I'm selling it

_quinnhughes and taking my nephew

ynssecretaccount NOT MY BABY

_quinnhughes that's what you get

barzal97 hmm .. weird first impression here

ynssecretaccount it won't always be like this

ynssecretaccount i'm really fun

trevorzegras uh?

jackhughes when did he get here?

ynssecretaccount been here. there's a lot of randoms here. they'll make their appearances eventually

jjmccarthy

Liked by lhughes_06, michiganfan34 and 148,339 others

jjmccarthy No better man to be marrying my sister! Congratulations Mr. & Mrs. Hughes. I love you endlessly, sis 🥹

tagged ynhughes and lhughes_06

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lhughes_06

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lhughes_06 12.28.24 - I present to you, the best day of my life. I love you more than words, Mrs. Hughes

tagged ynhughes

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trevorzegras lukey pookie is GROWN! congratulations brother. you got a really good one!

lhughes_06 the best one!

lhughes_06 thanks trev :)

elblue6 I couldn't be happier for you guys! it was such a gorgeous day!

lhughes_06 all thanks to you mama!

ynhughes we love you so much Mrs. Hughes!

elblue6 I think you can call me Ellen, now, Mrs. Hughes 😉

ynhughes 🥹 CRYING

trevorzegras you made it

markestapa beyond happy for you both

ynhughes thank you! thanks for coming :)

nolan_moyle michigan reunion went crazy

ynhughes 😑

nolan_moyle I said sorry for the cake :(

mackie.samo what did you do to the cake!?

lhughes_06 you would know if you were there

mackie.samo ouch

fan#1 CONGRATULATIONS!!!

rutgermcgroarty congrats!!!!!

ynhughes so so good to see you!

lhughes_06 thanks for coming man @mackie.samo

mackie.samo okay dude

ilovelukeyhughesy off the market officially

nhl another congrats to the newly weds!!!

Liked by ynhughes

colecaufield congrats you guys! thanks for the invite!

ynhughes uhm DUH!? we missed you!

lhughes_06 thanks for coming Cole!

biznasty don't fuck this up Hughes. congrats you guys!

lhughes_06 wouldn't dream of it

ynhughes thank you! and thank you for behaving at the wedding!

biznasty I may be a dick, but I could never ruin yn's wedding day

ynhughes you love me 🥹

trevorzegras why are you so nice to them and not me

lhughes_06 just get married

njdevils congratulations YN & Luke!

ynhughes YN Hughes has the best ring to it

lhughes_06 Mr. & Mrs. Hughes

ynhughes YN & Luke Hughes

lhughes_06 have I told you I love you?

ynhughes maybe a few times. have i told you i love you?

lhughes_06 maybe, but I forgot

trevorzegras GO AWAY

colecaufield this is GROSS

jjmccarthy if there had to be another name yn takes, I'm glad its Hughes

lhughes_06 that means a lot jj (if it doesn't work out i'll give you my last name instead)

jjmccarthy don't mention it (good I was shaking in my boots for a minute)

ynmccarthyhater what does he even see in her? no one uglier

Liked by ynhughes

_quinnhughes

Liked by biznasty, njdevils and 91,556 others

_quinnhughes no better person to be adding to the family! Congratulations to the newest & automatically best Hughes, and Luke. Thanks for letting me step in for the first dance @ynhughes :)

Comments on this post have been limited

elblue6 you're the best older brother for Luke, Quinn!

_quinnhughes thanks ma :)

jackhughes middle child over here

canucksfan my man looking fiiiiine in a suit

ynhughes Quinn 🥹 you're the best brother in law. thank you for your endless love & support! i wouldn't have wanted to dance with anyone else. i love you

_quinnhughes I love you back!

biznasty nice post Hughes

Liked by _quinnhughes and ynhughes

nhl congrats to the newlyweds!

jamie.drysdale it was touching to see you guys dance

_quinnhughes too bad yn has two left feet

ynhughes oh i'll remember that

canucks congrats yn and Luke!

lhughes_06 I love you bro

_quinnhughes love you long time!

trevorzegras awww, quinny the sap

jackhughes I'll never get used to it

_quinnhughes you two can expect no posts for your weddings

#1hockeyfan WAKE UP MOM AND DAD GOT MARRIED

jamie.drysdale it's the best day ever

ynhughes Jamie responding to fans >>>>

trevorzegras Jamie responding to fans 🤝🏻 YN responding to haters

jamie.drysdale couldn't have said it better

jjmccarthy thanks for taking care of yn like I would

_quinnhughes no need for thanking. it's my job

ynhughes QUINN STOP I'LL CRY AGAIN

yns#1fan Joy of my Life was the perfect song

ynhughes bye.

_quinnhughes I think I need to get involved now

ynhughes omg wait ... mackie didn't even go. it's up to rutger and adam

jackhughes and adam's been reeeeeaaal quiet

adamfantilli congratulations yn and Luke!

adamfantilli you guys looked great!

adamfantilli the venue was BEAUTIFUL

ynhughes TILLI

ynhughes HOW COULD YOU

adamfantilli i can explain?

ynssecretaccount

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ynssecretaccount and party we did 😎

tagged nicohischier

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[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

azul meeting leech parents and leech twins meeting ashengrotto parents?

Family means Nobody is Left Behind or Forgotten.

Azul meeting the Leech parents!

“Ahhh, you must be Mr. and Mrs. Leech. It’s wonderful to finally meet the parents of my dear vice dorm leader Jade and my invaluable associate Floyd. Azul Ashengrotto, at your service.”

His smile was dialed up to 11 as he produced business cards from within his jacket. One for the father and one for the mother, then an extra card apiece in case the first were lost or damaged. Azul handed them over with a flourish. Only Mr. Leech accepted a single card, slipping it from the boy by pincering his index and middle fingers like a crab’s claw.

He held it out for his wife—a hand covering her mouth, hiding her expression. Mr. Leech ran his own gaze over the printed text, reading simultaneously. Name, positions, contact information. His eyes slightly narrowed, in that almost imperceptible way that Jade’s did.

Ah, there’s the family resemblance.

“I would provide you with my own, but I’m afraid you would have to sign an NDA first. Due to the nature of my… occupation, there are many legal hoops for others to jump through.”

“An NDA!! I see that you’re a man after my own heart,” Azul gushed. “I’m a businessman myself, so I completely understand the importance of keeping trade secrets. Please, think nothing of it. Just keeping my information on file is enough for me.”

With a nod, Azul’s business card vanished into Mr. Leech’s suit. “Agreeable young man.”

It was difficult for Azul to hold his smirk at bay. Bingo. I’ve gotten an ‘in’.

“Ehhhh, how strange. You’re a little different in real life than how Jade and Floyd described you,” Mrs. Leech piped up, giggling.

“Oh? And how, may I ask, did they describe me?”

“Let’s see… What was it again? Do you remember their specific wording, angelfish?”

“I believe it was… ‘A cute, squishy crybaby with an absolutely terrible personality. High-strung and hopelessly greedy. Prod him in the right places and his composure will break down completely. A treat to bully.’ Something to that effect.”

“Wh-What…!!” Azul sputtered, his jaw agape. “I-I am no such thing!! I STRONGLY refute their claims.”

Those two…! Making me sound like an utter buffoon to their parents!!

“My, myyy~” Mrs, Leech drawled, latching onto her husband’s arm. “Did you see that just now? His cheeks turned bright pink and his eyes went sooo wide. He really is as adorable as Jade and Floyd said he is!”

“Is that so? Hmm… I’m getting hungry myself. The young man is starting to look rather appetizing.”

“A-Are you joking!?” Azul demanded, bolting up from his seat. “If so, I do not find this the least bit amusing…!!”

“Fufufu. Perhaps you can kindly recommend a hearty octopus dish or two from your eatery’s menu.”

“Ehehehe~ I’m so pleased that Jade and Floyd have such a fun friend around at school!”

“This is no laughing matter!!”

Jade and Floyd meeting the Ashengrotto parents!

“Mr. and Mrs. Ashengrotto.”

“Azul’s mom and dad!”

"It's nice to see you again, ma'am," the twins said in unison. They wore a matching smile, showing all of their sharp teeth. "And it's nice to finally meet you, sir."

“Ah, I recognize you.” Mrs. Ashengrotto’s eyes lit up with realization. “You’re the Leech boys that would come by and drag him out to play with you. You used to be so small—look at you now, you’ve grown so much!”

“Yup, that’s us!”

“We were little rascals back then. It was terrible of us to pull Azul away from his precious studies." Jade chuckled into one hand. "But not to worry, we've been on the straight and narrow ever since those childhood days. Isn't that right, Floyd?"

"Yeah, Jade~"

"It must be fate that you were brought back together at Night Raven College." Mr. Ashengrotto's laugh was warm and hearty, like a stew in the dead of winter. "What do you three get up to nowadays?"

"Lotsa stuff! Azul's got this whooole operation going on, and we're there to help him out," Floyd replied cryptically. "Jade and I advertise and do crowd control! Azul's the brains, he handles the plans and money and whatever."

"Advertise" as in, "luring unsuspecting souls into making deals" and "crowd control" as in, "dealing with debtors who tried to weasel out of those deals". Trinkets, money, talents. Everything Azul collected had a chance of being paid for in blood. Dirty prizes--but it was a secret none had to know.

"You work well as a group," Mrs. Ashengrotto remarked. "Reminds me of myself and my own restaurant staff!"

"Well, Azul does often speak about how he respects you. It does not surprise me that he works to live up to your sparkling reputation." Jade's eyes cut to a table across the way, where Azul was seated and chatting with his own parents. He appeared to be flustered about something, having risen from his seat, his mouth flapping in protest while Mr. and Mrs. Leech grinned widely. Jade himself smirked at the sight.

"He's been a blast to be around!" Floyd agreed, slinging an arm around his twin. "Azul's suuuch a good leader. Think we'll be stickin' with him to the ends of Twisted Wonderland and back, hehe."

"That's right, Floyd."

Until he becomes boring, he had once claimed. It had been winter break, and they were seated on the floor of Scarabia's lounge, mancala beads in hand. Azul had agreed, had already considered that inevitability.

But Moray eels were not known for their honesty. The truth, they only spoke out of his earshot.

"It's nice that you'll always be there for each other. I envy that deep bond you share." Mr. Ashengrotto raised his glass--provided free, courtesy of Azul. "A toast? To the future of our boys and their friendship."

Mrs. Ashengrotto followed her husband's lead. Then Jade, then Floyd.

Their glasses met in the middle with a resounding clink.

[reiderwriter]

♦️Pardon The Way That I Stare♦️

Chapter 8 of That's What You Get

Prev Chapter || Next Chapter

Summary: After some encouragement from Emily and Penelope, you try to explain your reaction to Reid at work. Until you find yourself reacting to him more and more, distracting you from doing your job. Warnings: Alcohol consumption, mentions of sex, Reader is just really horny for Reid (REAL). A/N: We're getting closer to the climax and I'm SO beyond excited for everyone to read the next chapter because I think it's going to be so good but also so evil and I enjoy that very much. If you like the series, let me know by dropping a message in the replies or in my inbox, and follow my other account @reiderslibrary for just fics from me without my random thoughts and bullshit in between... You can find masterlist here, and the series masterlist is linked here!

You were stupid, there was no other logical explanation for it. Staring at Emily on your doorstep as your brain stood there, slack-jawed and wide-eyed, trying to process the words she’d just said to you, there was really only one thing running through your brain.

“I’m a fucking dumbass.” you groaned, your hands coming up to your head as you pondered your next move.

“There’s no chance that you’ll believe this was all just one practical joke that I’ve been playing to test how quickly you could turn up at my place with wine?” You looked up hopefully at Emily, and she returned with a concerned look of her own, that silently communicated ‘No, I wasn’t born yesterday.’

“Worth a shot, come on in.” You opened the door wider for Emily and grabbed a second glass from your kitchen to share the wine before she could start her interrogation.

“So,” she prompted as soon as you returned to the couch, and you sighed heavily as you nodded and began.

“I married Reid in Vegas.”

“Yes, I got that from the text, what I didn’t get was why, what, when, where, who, and how! Question words, Y/N, important information if you please.” You chuckled at Emily’s tone, and you melted a little into your couch. Just like with Penelope, letting others know had comforted you. You’d never been one to bottle up your emotions, and you couldn’t exactly tell Spencer how you felt about him, so your dearest FBI-assigned best friends were a welcome compromise.

“You promise not to tell anyone? Penelope knows, and so does Rossi, but no one else does. Well maybe someone else but I don’t know who that someone is - long story.” You rambled, still aware of the promise you’d made with Spencer, and knowing that you’d actually broken it twice now.

“Scouts honor, now get on with it.”

“You were never a scout.”

“That’s beside the point, Y/N, now spill!”

“Do you remember when we finished the case in Vegas last weekend, and we all wanted nothing more than to go home, but the jet was landed?” A small nod encourages you to continue. “Well, Reid offered to show me this bar that he thought I’d enjoy, and honestly, I’d had a tense phone call with my mom and was feeling a bit crappy, so I thought a drink wouldn’t hurt.”

“A drink might get you married though.” You glared at her at the interruption, and she held her hands up in surrender as you continued.

“The bar was amazing, and he noticed I was feeling down, and I don’t know, he just has this way of making me feel calm and fully together. I was a mess earlier that day, but with like one short conversation, he kind of turned my mood entirely around.” You flushed then and decided to ignore Emily’s next interjection.

“Oh god…”

“Apparently after that, we went to a casino or another bar or something, but honestly, I drank so much I don’t remember any of that. But at some point, we bought a very expensive engagement ring, made our way to the Bureau for Wedding Licences and then a chapel and now we’re legally married.” You tried to end your story there, but Emily wasn’t having that.

“No, you’re not stopping there. You said you kissed, and you ruined everything, and you mentioned a wedding night in that text, do not shortchange me now, Y/L/N. Wait, should I be calling you Reid now?” She grinned at the flush that coated your entire body with that, and you buried your head in your pillows.

“Okay, okay. Well, we’re trying to figure out who the witnesses to our wedding were. We know that two team members were there, and Penelope was one of them, but Spencer doesn’t know that yet. Again, another long story.” You let your words sink in as you realize the tangled mess you’d spun for yourself in the last week.

“We spent some time researching our options on Saturday night, to see if we could get our memories to come back and I might not have left until a couple hours ago?”

“Y/N! You’ve been banging Reid for the last three days?”

“No! No, nothing like that, we didn’t- well, we did just not at his house, but also I don’t think you want to hear about that.” You spilled all the details about your last few days with Reid, his touches, his care, the dates you’d been on, the way you’d wrapped yourself around each other in your sleep, but still woken up to an empty bed, all the way up to that fateful kiss and your stupid reaction.

“So there, I’ve ruined it.” Emily looked at you pityingly and started to say something when your doorbell rang a second time.

“That’s reinforcements,” Emily said, standing and moving to greet the newcomer herself. You were relieved when Penelope Garcia came marching through the door, ice cream in hand and mouth already moving.

“Have no fear, your guardian angel is here. Emily texted me en route and I disentangled myself from my plans with a now very suspicious Derek Morgan to race over here. I think I managed to throw him off the scent by mentioning my ukelele lessons with Sam though, he always kinda glazes over whenever I go into heavy details about that.” She perches herself on the couch beside you and starts organizing things on the table, pulling out three tubs of ice cream and locating adequate spoons in the drawer.

“Pen, you didn’t have to do all this…”

“Yes, I did. Emily tell her I did. I need all the details that you suddenly remembered Y/N or I’m going to go crazy, and let me tell you, I am not an effective tech analyst when my mind is all aflutter with wonder.” You smiled awkwardly at the situation. You’d glossed over the details of your wedding night with Emily, going no further than insinuating that you’d had sex, but now the pressure was on.

“We just want to help you, Y/N. And we’re morbidly curious.” Emily joined in. Both of their eyes were trained on you in a hopeful expression, leaving the ball firmly in your court as you fought down the embarrassment rising from the back of your throat.

Closing your eyes, you took a deep breath.

“I think it was the best sex I’ve ever had in my life,” was all you managed to squeak out before they were reacting, asking twenty questions each in the space of a minute as your body both caught fire at the memory and shrunk down to the size of an ant at the attentions.

“Calm down, calm down, I’ll tell you more but you have to calm down.” They stilled themselves and bit their tongue, and you continued.

“Well I don’t want to get into the, uh, specific details, but let’s just say that he’s very good at putting theory into practice. That or he’s actually very experienced in sex and nobody ever realized, because the things he was doing were like, expert-level maneuvers. I didn’t think I was that flexible until he was hitting from-”

“OKAY not that much detail, this is still Reid we’re talking about.”

“Sorry,” you giggled sheepishly and decided to spare them all the details. “All I’ll say is that we both finished multiple times. And I might have stupidly let him finish inside of me.”

“Y/N, you should know better! Safe sex is really important, especially if you’re fucking in a hotel room in Vegas.” Emily half-chastised you, but you could hear the humor in her voice and just rolled your eyes.

“Yeah, well, I wasn’t exactly having sex with a stranger, I was having sex with my husband.” That got you a teasing cooing from the two women and you buried your face in your hands again.

“So he’s your husband now, is he? How long have you been married? Like three days?”

“Five. Fuck, we’re running out of time.” The length of time that had elapsed since you’d walked down the aisle shocked you as soon as you’d acknowledged it, and you downed your glass of wine as your brain ran rampant.

“Rossi said that if we didn’t tell everyone in a week, he’d do it for us so we didn’t lose our jobs, and we need to file for an annulment soon so we don’t have to get a divorce but there’s like… a one week window, and it’s already been five days. Shit. shit shit shit shit.”

“Hold on, Y/N, you said he kissed you earlier today, right? I wouldn’t exactly recommend getting married and then dating your partner, but it sounds like you both at least like each other enough to pursue this relationship, why would you need an annulment?” Emily’s confusion only served to remind you of the reason they were both here in the first place.

“That’s the problem. I think he thinks I don’t like him like that. And it’s totally my fault that he thinks that, because when he kissed me I didn’t react well and then he just left, and I think I ruined everything.”

“Define not reacting well,” Emily probed further.

“I pushed him away and slammed the door in his face. But that was only because I remembered everything that happened between us on our wedding night, and remembering the most satisfying experience of your entire existence while face-to-face with the man who you’d hitherto never thought capable of that, and having it occur in like 0.02 of a second is a paralyzing experience.”

“Oh my god, you’re an idiot,” Penelope whispered from her side of the couch and you nodded heartily in agreement.

“And what, he just left?” Emily asked again, tone incredulous with all the information she was receiving.

“Well when I’d had my moment and realized what I’d done, I opened the door again and he wasn’t there. And that was only like a minute later. He messaged me this after he left.” You grabbed your phone and opened it up, showing the girls the message and noting their winces in reaction to his words.

“It’s bad, right?”

“No! No, this is salvageable! You just have to… be brave?” Penelope didn’t seem to believe her own words as you pulled your phone back and poured yourself another glass, ready to drown your sorrows once again. Emily was a little more confident.

“Okay. Here’s what you do. I’m going to talk to Rossi for you tomorrow morning at work, get him to hold off on his big reveal while you go and explain everything to Spencer. How does that sound?”

“That sounds doable, I guess.” You sniffled a little, rereading the text having made your emotions jump back up to the surface again as you fought off tears.

“Brilliant. And then you can stay married and continue having wonderful sex, and make some genius babies and make me their godmother.” You threw a pillow at Penelope that she was just too slow to catch, and filled the rest of your evening with wine, ice cream, and good company.

–X–

Emily sends you a thumbs-up text after she talks to Rossi the next morning, and a weight falls off your shoulder. One step down, one to go right?

You’d arrived at work probably a little bit too early, having spent the night tossing and turning and playing every possible outcome in your mind over and over again. It had been half an hour before the next person turned up, and Hotch had only given you a confused half-nod in greeting before secluding himself in his office. Rossi had been the next to arrive, about twenty minutes later, and he too had questioned your presence but not in so many words.

“Early morning, Y/N? Settling into new routines in your newly-wed life, are we?” You’d stuttered out an answer but he was halfway up the stairs by the time you finished, obviously meaning the comment to be rhetorical.

Morgan, Emily, and JJ were all next, showing up only a few minutes before your shift officially started, but there was no sign of Reid, and you were running out of time - and privacy - to talk to him.

Then at 9 sharp the elevator doors opened, and from your seat at your desk, you watched him step out, feeling your tongue grow thick and your heart beat faster as he made his way into the office. This wasn’t how you were supposed to feel, this was cartoonish like a teenage boy in a brat pack movie watching the hottest girl in the school walk down a corridor. This was Spencer, your husband, and your best friend, and here you were feeling giggly and shy.

You almost felt like texting Emily back, telling her if you started giggling and twirling your hair, to take you out back and put you out of your misery.

He didn’t make eye contact with you as he settled into his morning routine, pulling off his scarf, putting his bag away, and then moving to the kitchen to fill up on his morning coffee. You did your best to covertly follow him, trying not to alert the others to your heart eyes as you looked at him and forgot everyone else.

“Spencer, can we talk?” You blocked off the entry to the kitchen as he spun around to face you, a bittersweet smile playing on his lips.

“Sure, Y/N, what’s up?” His voice didn’t betray any of his emotions, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes, and you could tell you’d hurt him the day before. You took a deep breath and walked closer to him as he continued making his coffee, again refusing to look you in the eyes as he continued as normal.

“It’s about yesterday-”

“We probably shouldn’t talk about this here, right?” He cut you off in a whisper, his voice sending shivers down your spine as you gripped the countertop beside him for support. You’d gotten closer than you expected at first, somehow magnetically drawn to him, your body language just as open to him as he was closed to you.

“I think we need to, Spence. I’m sorry, I panicked.”

“No, it’s my fault, I shouldn’t have done that-”

“Spencer I got my memory back.” His eyes widened and he blossomed in front of you again, attention entirely on you now as he took in your words.

“You did?”

“Partially, only the… Only the memories of your hotel room.” His eyes darkened in understanding, moving unconsciously closer to you, placing a hand next to yours on the counter as he effectively trapped your body in.

“Oh. Those memories.”

“Yeah. So you can see why I was a bit distracted.” He nodded at your words, but he was still coming closer to you now. Your body felt weak underneath you, entirely reacting to his closeness, the warmth rolling off his body, the electricity sparking between you despite him not touching you anywhere.

“Distracted?” His eyes darted to your lips as he grew closer, and your legs chose that exact second to give in underneath you.

Your knees hit the ground uncomfortably, as he reacted to your sudden movement, trying to grab you and pull you up, but only managing to grab the hand that was already holding the counter above you, awkwardly twisting and pinning your arm up.

“Oh my god. Oh my god, I’m sorry, I think… I think I should go,” you were face to face with his crotch, and looking up at him in that position was certainly giving you unwholesome thoughts. He jumped back as you scrambled out from underneath him, begging whatever god was out there that none of the profilers you worked with would question the dazed state that would follow you for the rest of the day.

–X–

Despite your need to straighten things out with Spencer, you’d avoided him for the rest of the day, and, having been called out on a case, you spent the better part of the week avoiding him as well. After literally falling for him, you’d decided that maybe in your newly weakened lovesick stage, it was best for everyone on the team that you try to stay as clear-headed as possible.

Not everyone on the team, though, agreed. He’d trailed after you like a lost puppy for days now, and you wanted nothing more than to give in and throw yourself in his arms. But there was a murderer on the loose and you needed to give your entire attention to it.

He’d tried multiple times to get you to help him with some work, suggesting that you go through some files together, or check out one of the witnesses together, much to your discomfort. Luckily, Hotch had picked up on some of the discomfort between the two of you and had kept you somewhat apart, not asking questions.

But the last night on the case, he’d cornered you, and you had to work twice as hard to extricate yourself from the situation.

“Y/N, why are you avoiding me?” He’d caught you alone in the hotel lobby, pulling you into a dark corner without much foot traffic to confront you. “Is it because of the kiss? Because the way you talked about getting your memories back the other day made me think we were okay about that again, but if we’re not then I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable.”

“It’s not the kiss, Spence, and we really shouldn’t be talking about this here.” You tried to turn and leave, but he grabbed your elbow and spun you back into him, bodies pressed flush up against each other now.

“Spencer let go, someone could see us.” Even you knew your voice sounded half-hearted, not really wanting him to stop touching you at all.

“If it’s not the kiss, then why are you acting like I don’t exist?” His face was close again, and you felt your body reacting the same way it had done in the staff kitchen. Your knees went weak again, but he was prepared this time, holding you up in his arms, gently maneuvering you so you were pinned against the wall.

“Is this it?” He asked, letting his hands trail over your body as you whimpered under his touch. “Your reactions?”

Your brain was empty of a response, so you just held still, desperate to see what he would do or say next.

“You know, the deadline on our annulment has passed. It’s been over a week now,” he said, his forehead resting on yours as he brought his hips ever closer.

You were the one that gave in first, pushing your head up to capture his lips in a crushing kiss, needing him the way you needed water, food, and sleep. You’d deprived yourself for so long, and now you were hungry, ravenous, and he was the same. Your lips opened, and soon his tongue was snaking in, caressing you in ways both familiar and new, and your entire body heated up to its boiling point.

You moaned under his touch as his hands wandered, silently begging for more of him. Your brain only kicked back into gear when you registered the sound of voices about to turn the corner. Quickly pushing him off, you pulled yourself together just as JJ and Morgan found you there.

“Y/N, Reid, Garcia got a positive ID on our unsub, we’re about to go SWAT his house, get your gear ready.”

Either you were very good at masking your emotions and the physical outburst you’d just shared, or Morgan was just too caught up in getting his job done that he didn’t look too closely at the way Reid’s tie was half undone, your lips were pink and swollen and that both of you were breathing abnormally. Whichever it was, you were just thankful that neither of them questioned you as you all left to go and do your job.

–X–

To your detriment, you’d avoided him on the jet back as well, choosing to wrap a blanket around yourself and sit in a single seat at the end of the plane rather than risk his hands on you again like last time. You already couldn’t be trusted around him, and you wanted to take no risks with everyone else present.

He’d sat in your line of vision purposefully though, making eye contact every now and then to remind you that he was still watching you. You’d feigned exhaustion and pretended to sleep in the end, despite the flight duration only being a measly two hours. He’d let you exit the plane alone though, and said a general goodbye to the team upon landing, giving you a second look and wave before taking himself home.

The ball was firmly in your court.

“What the hell was all that?” Emily whispered in your ear as you both watched him leave alone. “What happened to the plan?” You smiled awkwardly, not wanting to admit how fucking horny the man made you feel, and how it was affecting your work performance so badly that avoiding him was the only way to keep your job.

“We had the talk, everything’s fine.”

“The two of you aren’t walking out of here hand in hand, so obviously everything is not fine, Penelope, tell me I’m wrong.” The other woman had stumbled into the bullpen upon landing and Emily had immediately drawn her into your hushed conversation as soon as Morgan had made to go home as well.

“What’s going on, hot stuff, I thought you’d be enjoying every second of your marital bliss by now.”

“He’s too distracting.” You whisper shouted at him. “He kissed me again last night and I almost let him take me in the lobby. And Morgan and JJ almost caught us, so yeah, he’s too distracting.”

“Oh god, you’re horny for Reid.” Emily laughed slightly at the implication as if it had just dawned on her and you hadn’t had an entire conversation where you fawned about how good in bed he was.

“Yes, I’m horny for Reid, okay, now please stop laughing, I’m in pain.”

“Well you know there’s only one solution, right?” Penelope said as if it were clear as day. “You need to go have sex with him again. See if you can be normal with him when you’re not so pent up.”

“I don’t know, Pen….” You were still staring at the elevator doors, even after it had been so long since he’d left.

“What is there to not know? You like him, he likes you, you’re married. Like you said before, it’s not like you’re having sex with a stranger, he’s your husband.” Having your words thrown back in your face gave you the boost of confidence that you needed, and you sprang from your chair.

“Okay.”

“Okay?” Emily repeated and you looked back down at the two women.

“Okay, I’m gonna… I’m gonna go seduce my husband, I guess?” You turned on your heel and left, marching out to the sounds of whoops and cheers from the two women behind you.

🏷️ @w-windyy @multifandom-on-the-side @reidandhotchsgirl @babybluecakes @hugyourlungs @prentissesredtanktop @reidscaffeine @bethanyhaas01 @average-sunflower @academiareid @sailortongue @daddy-dotcom @high-functioning-cosplayer @anniewhalelover @abbyshmaby @isabel-ffl-xoxo @sujan39 @frxcless @bluestuesday @busy-buzzing @breadbrobin @maxinehufflepuffprincess @l0v3cam @booksandwonderlands @myescapefromthislife @ferrjulie @scoobydoopoo @aelinismyqueen @littlesingingbean @jamiemuscatosslut @xohoneybun @anchovy89freya @dysphoricsanity @ghostheartbeat @casss2111 @rebloggiest-reblogger @wishyoudaskme @imawhoreforu @academiacoffeelover @softservepunk @andiebeaword @r-3dlips @wakaladjarin @ratbastardchild @mcira @danika1994 @stargurl99 @whovianwholikesgirls @its-not-too-late-for-coffee

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for telling my best friend I'm in love with her mother?

I (18m) have been friends with this girl (I'll call her S for this, 18f) forever. I can’t remember a time when we weren't friends. We've always spent a lot of time at each other's houses, though more at hers as her family is wealthy and has a really nice place with an in-ground pool... and also her mom just makes the best snacks lol

Her mom and I have always had a good rapport. She's a funny lady, charismatic, kind, and did I mention the bomb-ass snacks? I had a sort of a puppy love crush on her as a kid, but as we've gotten older the feelings have only gotten stronger. Meanwhile, S has had a crush on me since middle school. She isn't subtle, but she hasn't confessed and I haven't brought it up because I'm not interested and I don't want to hurt her or lose her as a friend. S has caught me checking her mom out a few times, one time even walking in on me in the bathroom while I was trying to lowkey check out her mom in the pool through the window. I don’t think she ever put together what was going on, though.

I never planned on acting on my feelings for her mom, but since her dad took off, I'm pretty sure I've been getting flirty vibes from S's mom? I might be seeing what I want to see instead of what's there, but like... Okay, so, this summer she's been paying me to do some of the housework her husband used to take on. Mowing the lawn and stuff. And S's mom will come out with just a towel on to tell me I missed a spot. To me, that seems flirty.

I never thought I'd have a chance, but now that it seems I might, I kind of wanna go for it? I mean, I'm 18 now, so it's legal, so I don't see why it would be a problem? But I didn't want to shoot my shot while S is entirely in the dark, so I sat her down and explained. We were hanging out around her pool and her mom wasn't home, I figured it was a good time. I started by finally acknowledging her feelings but gently telling her she just wasn't the girl for me. Then I said straight up "I'm in love with your mom."

S just kinda stared at me? Then she just said "dude, what the fuck" and yeah. Yeah, I know, what the fuck, but the heart wants what it wants, right? I said that I was pretty sure her mom had been making moves since S's dad left. I've never heard S laugh the way she did at that, it was kind of scary. She asked if I was serious and then told me I need serious help. I was a bit hurt by that but I know I'm asking a lot so I didn't go off about it. I just said yes I'm serious and wanted her blessing to act on it. She didn't say anything. She just got up and left, and pushed me into the pool as she passed.

She wouldn't talk to me except to tell me to go home and it's been weeks now but she won't answer my texts. I think I've just lost the two most important women in my life (don't tell my mom she's third pls.) Am I the asshole here? I know it might be wrong, but I can’t help it if I'm in love with Stacy's mom. :(

What are these acronyms?

[dirtylittlefairytales]

Don't play with fire | - Part 2 - |

Autors Note: I recommend to read Part 1 first. This is going to be a rollercoaster, but I hope you like it. I liked writing it and I'm really happy I started writing again. Now I try writing smut too. If you like the song 'Unholy from Sam Smith' listening to it later on, made the scene better. At least I listened to it while I wrote the scene.

Also as before, english is not my first language, I hope I corrected most mistakes.

Summary: After having a panic attack and realizing that Cooper could be the Butcher., you tried living your life normally again, until you got a text from an unknown number. Should you go to the police? Half a year later everything is normal again, at least you think it is.

-> Writing in 'italic' is supposed to be the your thoughts

Warnings: Dark!Fic, Describing of a Panic attack, Age Gap! (Legal), Swearing! Praise! Alcohol consumption!, drugs!, bit of Smut, Angst!, Arguing

Rating: R

Word count: 7,4k

Tagging: @a-movie-that-youve-never-seen, @amethystblackkchaos, @hereforthehitsbaby, @waywardtigersandwich

That was your first panic attack you had in your life. You spend that day at the hospital, your mom picking you up in the evening. She didn’t pry for information, although she was very worried. When you got back to her house and sat in the living room over a hot tea, you told her everything– Though more like everything she could know.

You told her about the concert, how you weren’t feeling well because of the crowd of people. So you went home early, then your bike got stolen and your boss fired you after some nasty words. You said you didn’t know how you ended up at the hospital, you were just aimlessly walking and then woke up in the hospital. Remembering a lot of concerned voices around you but nothing more. 

Seeing that you were near tears again your mom started to hug you for several minutes. You let it all out. All those bottle up emotions of the day. You just didn’t know what to do with all these emotions. It was too much, like you weren’t in control anymore.

“You know sweety, you should move closer again. Ah no disagreeing! Think about it. You know my grandparents also had their apartment. Please consider it, I worry about you.” she said, squeezing your shoulders. “You could save so much money!”

“Okay mom. I promise I’ll think about it, but not today. Let me find a new job first.” you tried avoiding the situation. She nodded

“Well, come one you can sleep in your old room today. Tomorrow I'll drive you to the mechanic so you can get your car back.”

“Thanks mom.”, she kissed the top of your head and pushed you towards the stairs. Shaking your head, you went up towards your old room. You could barely say no to anything, when it came to your mom. However, moving back was the one thing you didn’t want. It was stupid. You wanted to live independent and not in your moms apartment, where she probably wouldn’t even allow you to pay rent.

Stepping inside your room, everything looked as you last remembered it. Your mom tried to make it look like your old room. The big double bed near the window, with the one teddy bear on it. A small wooden closet near the wall. You closed the curtains on the window and went to bed. 

On the bathroom mirror you could see a bruise starting to form on your shoulder, where Cooper had gripped it. Clearly you couldn’t wear something without sleeves the next few weeks. 

Before going to sleep you checked your phone. You nearly forgot about it. There was nothing. No new contact, no number saved anywhere, everything was the same. You remember it clearly, he told you he had saved his number, but nothing. You checked your phone completely. Looked through everything, photos, deleted messages, deleted contacts. Still nothing.

‘Had he just been toying with you? Playing into your anxiety?’ After checking your phone for a second time you gave up. Maybe you imagined it, maybe you should just call it a day. As soon as you put your phone down and your head hit your pillow you were out. The events of that day were finally catching up with you. 

Waking up the next day, you still felt exhausted but overall better. True to her word, your mom drove you to the mechanic, and reminded you to visit her once a week like you promised her on her last birthday. No more work excuses. 

You promised, she was getting older and you did want to spend more time with her. She turned 59 this year. You loved her, she always did her best. Recently your grandfather passed away, leaving everything to your mom. Your grandparents had an estranged relationship with your mom, but seeing as she was their only child… she inherited it all. Now your mom could live without worries. She had a house and had a spare apartment. Seeing as they did have a bit of money.

Over the next week you wrote more job applications and went to a couple of interviews. Until you finally found yourself a new job. The company and boss seemed nice and you even got to work from home 10 days a month. Big plus and the pay was decent. You stayed in your apartment most of the time after the concert, fearing you might run into Cooper somewhere. You were quite paranoid. Fearing what he would do to you. Were you going to be next, if he was the Butcher? 

With the new job, came new energy and you started to live again. Step by step you were going outside, to the office, meeting your friends or going out for drinks. Still sometimes, you looked around you. Feeling like someone was staring holes in your back.

The second panic attack came when on a day you were working from home. A few weeks had passed and overall it started like a totally normal day, just a few calls. Not much work to do that day and around lunch time you still wore your pajamas. When you went into the kitchen to cook, you suddenly got a text message from an unknown number. First you thought it was someone from work. Though, the number didn’t seem familiar, so maybe it was a customer? However, none had your private number. You opened the message and instantly knew who sent that text.

–You should watch the news. Unfortunately I must tell you that Spencer didn't seem to be very grateful. Sorry to disappoint you sweetheart. –

You dropped your phone, heart pounding in your chest. ‘Sweetheart– Was that Cooper? So he did have your number… Why should you watch the news?’ Slowly you crept down, picking up your phone from the floor and almost dropping it again. Your hands trembled so much. 

After releasing a shuddering breath, you put your phone in your pocket and stepped towards your living room. One step at time, fearing you might fall if you walked too fast. Holding on to your sofa for dear life, you reached for the remote. 

Turning on the TV, unsure of what you would find, you switched programs until you found the news channel. Your hands still trembling, you took deep breaths trying to calm yourself.

‘Maybe you should sit down?’ – Letting yourself fall onto the sofa you turned up the volume. You saw a lot of police in the background then view switched to the reporter, who started speaking

“Yesterday in the early hours, two hikers found something horrible on their daily hiking trail. We waited for further information from the police and we can now announce that the Butcher has found yet another victim. This marks the 13th victim of the Butcher.”

Your knuckles around the remote turned white from anticipation, your fingernails digging in your own palm. ‘Maybe you should stop with the acrylic nails’ You held your breath. They showed a photo of a young man on the screen. It wasn’t someone you knew.

“The victim seems to be a young man named Spencer–” Spencer.. That was the name he told you that day. You didn’t even listen to the rest of the news. Completely blending everything out, thoughts racing in your head. A sob escaped you, your whole body shook uncontrollably. Gasping for air, crying, you had your second panic attack. It felt even stronger then the first one, but maybe it was only because you were more aware now. 

A part of you felt like you killed Spencer. You had thought he was just playing with your fear. It was your fault. ‘What have you done… you were right all along. Your sixth sense didn’t leave you. Why haven't you gone to the police? Were you an accomplice now? Why haven’t you told somebody? You could have saved him…’ The answer was simple. You hadn’t been 100% sure. Hell until now you thought you imagined most of his weird behavior, were overthinking it, writing it off as anxiety.

Helplessly you wandered around towards your kitchen in the search for a bag. When you finally found one, you sank down against your cupboard. Taking deep breaths with the plastic bag to calm your breathing. After calming down and just sitting silently in your kitchen for 20 minutes, you got up and shut down the TV.

‘You couldn’t go to the police, could you? What if they held you responsible for it because you didn’t say anything until now. You didn’t even know his last name or where he lived.’ 

A dry and humorless laugh escaped you. Putting your face in your hand, trying to come to terms with reality. Finally you pushed your hair back and grabbed your phone.

Pondering if you should write back? Try to get information from him and go to the police? Could you get burned even more? Thinking for another minute you decided against it. Panic and anxiety controlled your actions. Your course of action was going in the complete opposite direction. Simply deleting the message. Deleting the evidence, deleting a small part of your guilt– ‘out of sight out of mind’

You didn’t continue work that day, called in sick, went to bed and just stared aimlessly at the ceiling. Thinking about everything. About the concert, about every small detail you remembered. All the strange things you thought he did, but in the end you thought it was just your imagination. 

This was so fucked up, why were you still alive and not locked up in some basement? Why were you still alive? He knew that you knew. By sending you that text, it almost seemed like he wanted you to know. It hardly made any sense to you. After hours and hours of thinking and getting a headache from it, you fell asleep rather exhausted.

Not even a day after you even changed your number, telling your friends and mom another lie. The excuse, you got too many spam calls on it, seemed to be good enough. You were that anxious that you were one step away from moving back into your mom's house. However you didn't want to exaggerate.

Everything you did, to feel secure didn’t help. The anxiety remained. Whenever you went outside you felt like a scared mouse, always looking around, getting in your car and inside the office building as quickly as possible. At first you looked for a black van, then you remembered that stupid little you had the great idea to reveal to him what the profiler said. Of course he was not driving that van anymore. Perhaps now he drove around in a girly pink car.

‘How could you have been so stupid?’, you wanted to bang your head against the table. You even judged Lady Raven for her naivety and here you were telling the Butcher what car to not drive. What to look out for. You helped him even further, by not going to the police. He must have been laughing at you in his head. What a fucking joke. He also must have realized what effect he had on you, using that for his advantage. That for one you found him attractive, on the other hand you were intimidated by him. You were glad you were still alive, but it also made you nervous.

A month later and nothing new from the Butcher and no strange occurrences you finally started to relax again. Cooper and all that happened was slowly being pushed to the back of your head. 

Furthermore, you moved out of your apartment. You felt spooked and unsafe in it. Living near your mom again gave you a small aspect of security back. Fortunately your workplace had a second office 20 min from your mom's apartment. You rented some transporter and with the help of your friends you moved your stuff into your new apartment within a day. Moving out helped your anxiety a lot.

Another month later, you started to go out with your friends again, didn’t look around every time you left your apartment and became more yourself. Feeling confident. You were slowly going after your hobbies again. Running outside, Swimming, visiting your favorite coffee shop or reading in the park on a good day. All without turning around every few seconds. 

Before you knew it about half a year had passed and it all was a mere memory. You hadn’t had another panic attack in months. Your job was great, you met your friends a lot, also visited your mom every week and you could even listen to music with noise canceling headphones again. It felt normal. Back to how it was before. There was no news from the Butcher. No new Butcher victims, just some mom in a horrible car crash, but aside from that there was just the usual news. 

It was around January, a Saturday, your birthday to be exact, where it began to get strange again. Even though it started out as every other birthday since you were 21. First brunch with your mum, having some good quality time in your favorite restaurant. After that, you went home again and around the evening your friends should arrive to go out. You should be around 10 people later. Normally you would just celebrate at home, but your best friend Simon wanted to party. Who were you to deny his wishes?

You had been Besties for ages, growing up with the same situation of a cheating parent, pushed you even closer together. It was only after high school where you went in different directions. Simon wanted to study, whereas you started working. There he met his better half Sebastian, they’ve been together ever since and when the three of you did something together they treated you like their child. Which you found hilarious. You loved them.

So a couple of friends were coming over and around midnight you would go dancing. When you arrived back at your apartment you noticed something strange. There was a small gift in front of your door. You looked around if you saw any of your neighbors before picking it up and unlocking your door. 

It didn’t seem to have a name anywhere. ’Strange. Maybe it was from that elderly woman on the first floor?’, you wondered. You put it on your kitchen counter, saving it for later. Seeing as you had only a couple of hours left to clean and dress up. Also you needed your makeup done before simon came, or he would go way overboard with his ideas. You already agreed to let him do your hair and change your outfit, if it was “too boring”. 

That was another reason he wanted you to go out. Maybe you would finally find prince charming and you could go on cute double dates.  In his opinion, your ‘no dating’ phase had been going on too long. Looking at yourself in the mirror you felt good. You decided to go with some short black pants, and a glittery black top with an open back. 

By the time the others arrived you totally forgot about the present still laying wrapped on the kitchen counter. Friend after friend arrived, all of them overly punctual. Except for two individuals, as always. You didn’t mind, it was only Lucas, a friend of Sebastian, with his girlfriend Mary. You didn’t particularly like her, Mary needed to be in the spotlight, sometimes you felt like she tried to replace you in your friend group. None of the others saw this most of the time though. She was ‘little miss perfect’. Well, except for Simon and Lizzy, they did see her other side sometimes.  

Putting on some music after everybody sat down in the living room, you went back to the kitchen to help Simon with the last drinks. As Simon was putting away the cake he brought on the kitchen counter he saw the small present laying around. “Who is this from?”

You walked towards him to see what he ment. “Oh, I actually don’t know. I think one of my neighbors left it for me.” shrugging you picked it up.

“Do you know what's inside?”, You shook your head, now you’ve done it. Simon loved a good mystery, something to solve, something thrilling.

“Well then, open it! I’ll get the rest of the drinks.”, he ushered you towards the living room where the others sat around your coffee table. Climbing over the back rest of your couch, you made yourself comfortable in the corner. Simon brought your drinks while you started to open the present. “What is it?”

“It’s…” you frowned. Pulling out a simple small teddy bear, with something silver on top. It was made out of plastic, nothing overly special. It was a Keychain.

“I think that’s something I could put on my keychain? Wait there's more…” There was something shiny at the bottom of the present. 

“A bracelet– Oh, it’s really pretty.” You held it towards the light, it sparkled brightly. It was a simple silver bracelet, with a little charm in the center. A cute colorful flower. 

“Aww how cute. But it seems like it was more for a child? Are you sure your neighbors know your age?” Lizzy laughed and poked you. She was what you would consider your girl bestfriend.

“Or maybe they know that you still have stuffed animals in your bed”,joked Simon and threw a pillow at him. “Hey, be careful, my drink!”, he exclaimed with a feigned outrage. You flipped him off. It wasn’t your fault that you could only go to sleep, while holding something in your arm.

“Don’t pout, come I’ll put the bracelet on. Then we get you a tiara and you’ll be a Disney princess.”Lizzy grabbed the bracelet of your hand and put it on you.

“And put the keychain thing to your keychain–”, Marcus said as they all laughed at your embarrassment. You gave them a look. 

“Really guys, do I have to?”, you whined. 

“Yes, give it to me, I’ll do it. You open the rest of our presents. I promise you’ll like them”, winked Simon and held out his hand. Reluctantly you gave him the key chain and started to open the other presents.

The other presents were way better. You got some games, wine and everybody plus your mom pitched in to buy you a new bike. They hid it in front of your door before. You had tears in your eyes as you thanked each of them. ‘You had the best friends’ 

After eating the cake there was nothing to stop you guys from going all out. Drinking games, Beer pong, dancing or just talking. Later on, Lucas and his girlfriend arrived around 10. At this point everybody was in a good mood and slightly drunk. On seeing the bike, Mary was offended that they hadn’t waited for them to give me my present. 

You were about to tell her that it was your birthday, when some of the others already apologized to her. Telling her they didn’t know when they would show up.Annoyed, you refilled your drink, and went back to the friends playing beer pong. You needed to get drunk more to be nice to her. She wasn’t even here for 5 minutes and everything had to resolve around her.

The party got louder and better, all having a good time. Half an hour before you wanted to leave Mary came to you while dancing, grabbing your arm. “Is that the bracelet you got from your neighbor? The others told me about it. It's so cute. Can I try it on? I always wanted something like this…”, Mary asked you with her stupid baby voice. She immediately tried grabbing it off your arm.

“Ehm, hey wait a second. Here, but I want back before we go.”, You didn’t want any drama today. She nodded her head, waved you off and reassured you that you would get it back in a second.

You did, in fact, not get it back within a second and when you were standing in the queue to the club, you realized that she still had it on. Now it was too late.

Inside the club your friends surprised you, they booked a small area to sit with a table in the middle. Some drinks and bottles, waiting for you in the middle. 

“Guys! You shouldn’t have!”, you exclaimed happily. 

“Only the best for you Birthday girl!” Simon cheered! Hugging you tightly. Celebrating your birthday never felt better. You did a few shots and then most of you went off dancing to the dancefloor for the next hour.

Coming back from the dance floor you sat back down exhausted. Every time you went out you asked yourself the same question. ‘Why did you even decide to wear heels today?’ All of you started to get new drinks and someone suggested to spice things up and play an old fashioned “Truth or Dare”. Without truth of course, because it was way too loud.

You loved these games, it was always fun to watch. Though you didn’t like doing dares yourself, always feeling a bit shy and easily embarrassed. Now with the alcohol you did feel more comfortable. Maybe you would be up to do a dare. As if reading your thoughts Simon yelled at you over the table “Y/N”. 

You looked at him with pleading eyes, your confidence dwindling. “Noo.. Please…”

“No! I’ve waited enough. I dare you to go out there and make out with a stranger!” he exclaimed, pointing to the dance floor. Some of your friends whistled at that. 

Not waiting for you to think about it Simon stood up. “Do you trust me? We go dancing and I promise I won’t let some creep near you. Only handsome guys?” He held out his hand. You thought about it. If not now, when would you ever do it? You needed to get over your own shadow. Quickly you emptied your glass. For the extra bit of confidence.

“Pinky promise?” you asked, feeling bold suddenly and holding out your pinky. He looked surprised and instantly linked your pinky with his. “Promisee.” happily he dragged you to the dance floor. 

“What's your age range? Still someone around your age?” Simon asked, wiggling his eyebrows. 

You rolled your eyes at his behavior. “I don’t know. He can be older… but not above 50!!” Simon pretended to be shocked at your revelation, holding his hand above his heart. 

“Older men! How scandalous!”, you jabbed his side. 

“Let's go before I change my mind.”, you threatened. As you made your way on the dance floor they started to play one of your favorite songs ‘Unholy’.

“As information, I’m going back as soon as I see you enjoy yourself. I’m not watching a full make out session from you.”, he shouted in your ear. Laughing, you nodded. Fair enough, you wouldn’t want to watch him make out with Sebastian either. Both of you started dancing to the music, stealing glances at the people around you. 

More like Simon was looking around, whereas you tried not to think about the dare too much. 

You felt the people dancing all around you. Swinging your hips and moving your arms around your body, you felt yourself getting lost in the music. 

Simon and you danced yourself further into the crowd. Someone bumped against your ass, touching it. Before you could even react somebody else pushed that person away. It was not Simon, seeing as he was still dancing right before you. He raised a brow gesturing behind you. Mouthing the simple word ‘Hot’.

While dancing you turned your head slightly to look behind. You couldn’t see much, all the flickering colorful lights made it hard to recognize anything. He was tall, broad shoulders and his hair seemed to be a bit longer. You continued dancing, Simon nodding at you. ‘Fuck it. Simon better not be wrong’ You trusted his judgment. In the rhythm of the music, you danced backwards until you found yourself practically grinding your ass on him. He didn't move away, dancing in sync with you.

One of his hands placed itself on your hip, pulling you even more against him. You felt a sudden rush of confidence, as you continued swaying your ass against him and felt something hardened in his pants. It felt huge. 

Using this confidence boost and as a confirmation you spun around, still dancing. ‘Could you do it?’ Looking up at his face, sadly, the flashing lights still barely illuminated his face. Looking closer you could make out a few facial features. He also had a slight beard. Even without knowing his exact looks, you felt a certain pull towards him. ‘I bet he is handsome’ You were not one to make the first move, but you were going to fulfill your dare. 

‘You could do it. You looked fucking hot  and you wouldn't see him ever again.’ Dancing against him, his slight erection pressing against you, you took the initiative, steadying yourself with one hand at his shirt. 'Why wouldn’t he take the first step? Why did the women need to take control in this situation?' Until now you were always the more experienced partner, so it was nothing new for you. Even though you would like some change. Him taking control, getting rough or just doing what he wants… Maybe you read too many dark romance books.

Slowly wandering with the other hand up his chest, resting it at his neck. Slightly you pulled his head towards you to push your lips onto him. His lips were rough. At first it was just you moving your mouth against his. You felt him putting away his drink on the high table next to you. 

As he still did not reciprocate the kiss and for a second you thought that you read the signs wrong. At least you fulfilled your dare. However as soon as you broke the kiss and stepped back, he roughly grabbed your face, pulling you back into him. Surprised by the sudden force of his grip, a small yelp escaped you, before he silenced it with a kiss. The action instantly sent a warm fuzzy feeling down to your core. 

Kissing you hard, your mouths moved in sync. His large hand on the side of your face kept your head in place. You winced slightly when he bit your lip, but he hardly seemed to notice. He tried to slip his tongue between your lips, but you denied it. 

Trying to gain control of the kiss and situation. You heard a low grumble from him, he seemed discontented with your attitude. You smirked against his lips, which seemed to annoy him further. Moving his hands down your body, he grabbed your ass, hard. The pain going straight into your core, making you moan into his mouth. He seized the opportunity to slip his tongue inside your mouth. 

This time you didn’t even try to get the upper hand, you liked that he was in control. Finally someone who was more dominant in these things. Giving you the time to explore this new, more submissive side. Letting go of your face he moved his hand down your body. Over your chest, stomach and finally resting at your hips, pulling you against him. Goosebumps traveled all over your body, where his hands touched you. Your brain felt dazed, this was the hottest makeout session you ever had. You didn’t care about his roughness or the biting, you rather liked it.

When he broke the kiss you were both panting heavily. Slowly, almost teasing, he traced his fingers up your spine before grabbing you by your hair and tilting your head upwards to look at him. Your mouth parted slightly, a small moan escaped your lips. It stung where he had his grip on your hair, but the slight pain turned you on even more. Sure you knew you liked reading about these kinds of things, but experiencing them made you feel even more aroused.  

For a split second, you thought you saw his panting expression change into a smirk. Before you could think twice, he kissed you again. Your mind instantly went blank, his kiss was like a drug. This kiss was slower, still rough but he set the tone. Moving his lips against yours, pushing his hand between your legs. You felt hot, everything felt way too hot to bear, never had you been kissed with such passion. You needed to be closer to him. You tried running your hands down his body. 

He removed his hands in an instant, grabbing yours and pushing them back to your sides. You let out a small whine. ‘What was going on with you? You never whined. You felt like a schoolgirl, making out for the first time’ Shaking his head disapprovingly, he turned away to grab his drink. Taking a sip, he held it near your lips, offering it to you. “It’s just water.”

You knew you shouldn’t drink from strangers, though you were way too drunk to think straight or even logically. ‘You wanted to keep making out and if that helped?’ Looking up at him you tilted your head forward against the glass and emptied the whole glass. You didn’t even realize how thirsty you were, and a glass of water seemed like a good option.

“Good girl.”, you heard his deep voice beside your ear. The loud music was making it hard to hear him clearly. The praise went straight to your core. He put his drink away and you began dancing to the music. More like grinding on each other. 

He still didn’t allow you to touch him much and you wanted nothing more than to travel your hands up and down on his body, or under his shirt. He leaned down, grabbing your hips to press you against him. Pressing his hard crotch against your lower stomach, making you inhale a sharp breath.  

“Can I get your number?” his deep voice mumbled against your ear. You pondered. It felt like he was growling. Slowly he began caressing your ear, gently kissing his way to your neck, making you close your eyes, leaning your head back to give him better access. Your legs were feeling weak. Running his thumb along your jawline, he sucked and bit in your neck, as he kissed his way back to your ear. 

“Please?” his voice was a low growl against your ear. Your eyes fluttered open again as you nodded, desire filled your body. You would do anything, if he kept going on like this. 

He kissed you softly this time and you bit his lip as he tried ending the kiss. You wanted to kiss him longer. You missed his warmth already, and also missed the dark look flashing up in his eyes. He pulled his phone out, tipping something before handing it to you. As you grabbed his phone, you felt yourself wobble to the side. Luckily he grabbed you in time and stadied you against his body. Now your back was pressed against his front.

You thought about grinding your butt against him, but as if sensing your thoughts he nudged you towards his phone. Looking at the screen, it was truly hard to concentrate for you. He kept sidetracking you by placing soft kisses on your neck.

Blinking rapidly you slowly made out the numbers. Your vision seemed a bit blurry, your eyes feeling so heavy. ‘You didn’t even drink that much’ After what felt like hours you successfully put in your number. As soon as you were done, he grabbed his phone back.

You were so drunk that you didn’t notice the contact already had a name. - Sweetheart - Turning back to him you nearly lost your balance, falling against his chest. His arm wrapped around your side, steadying you as he began walking you through the crowd of dancing people. You found it so difficult to keep your balance, you felt funny. You couldn’t seem to focus, everything stayed a bit blurred. You didn’t even know where he took you. Was he taking you home?

“Hey, sorry to bother you guys.”, he loudly said to someone over the music as he came to a stop. You leaned your face against his shoulder. You were really tired.

“You are her friends, right? I think someone put something in her drink, one minute she was fine and the next she could barely stand.” Your brows furrowed, ‘drugged? You were fine… when should that have happened? Didn’t those drugs work way quicker?’ Shocked gasps filled the air. 

“I thought I would bring her back to you, so you can get her home.” He had such a calming and sympathetic voice. ‘Why would he bring you back? You were having fun.’ You playfully bit him in his chest, making him tighten his grip on your hip. His lips pressed in a firm line.

“Yes, yes she is our friend. Oh fuck. Thank you so much man!” Four hands grabbed you off the stranger you were leaning onto. You pouted.

“No-o I don’t wa- want to”, your voice slurred, you sounded like a brat. Struggling against their grip, not wanting to leave his side, but they were stronger than you. Also your fight wasn't really that much of a fight as you thought, you could hardly stand straight. You didn’t even knew his name. His jaw clenched as he looked towards you and the two holding you, his eyes lingered on the arm of the girl.

“Yes yes, hopefully you got his number.”, said a high pitched female voice near your ear. It sounded like Mary. You looked around, it was Lucas and Mary who supported you. ‘Why those two?’

 “Why didn’t you tell me you liked older men?” Giggling, you shrugged your shoulders.

“He is so fine, maybe I should talk to him too.” Mary whispered in your ear. ‘What about her boyfriend?’

“Well, thanks again man, I’m Simon, her best friend. We’re taking her home asap, before something happens…” he began, as Lucas and Mary led you away. He gestured for them to stop, but they didn’t look back. Thus you couldn’t hear the rest of the conversation play out. It was a good thing. Drugged or not, your subconsciousness would have freaked out sooner or later.

“No problem Simon. It is what everybody would have done. Call me Cooper.”, he held his hand out for him to shake, which Simon gladly accepted.

“Nah, I don’t think so. Some sick fuck, may have taken advantage of her in a state like that. So thank you Cooper.. Shit, I just wanted her to have a good time on her birthday.”

“Don’t be too hard on yourself Simon. I was glad I could help. Wish her a happy birthday from me, I hope she feels better in the morning.” Simon nodded, turning around to talk with the others and Cooper soon vanished in the crowd. Slowly your friends started to follow the three of you back to the entrance of the club. 

“Hey, Y/N you stay here and wait. Lucas and I get the jackets. Just hold onto the handrail of the stairs or sit down. You can stand on your own for a bit, can’t you? ”she asked, concerned and something different in her voice. You gave her a thumbs up before holding onto the railing again. 

“We will hurry as best as we can, the others should be here soon.” She came closer, whispering in your ear. 

“Also you can stop your show now. Yes it’s your birthday, but do you need that much attention?”, with that she and lucas made her way to the coat check waiting line. 

You let your head fall back as you take deep breaths. ‘Show? What show?’ Deeply breathing in the fresh air that was coming from the entrance. Few people were walking past you either coming in or leaving the club. Still it was hard concentrating on anything, but you were doing okay.

Until you weren’t. All of a sudden you felt something against your back and in the next moment you lost your footing and along with the grip on the handrail and flew down the stairs. Instinctively your body tried not to hit the ground face first. For that you turned around to face the top of the stairs. ‘Was there a man?’ you thought. Blinking once whoever you thought you saw was gone, just panicked bystanders. Did you hear Simon?

Your side painfully crashed first into the stairs, then continuing falling further down the stairs. You tried your best to stop or push yourself up, but failed. Someone behind you grabbed your arm to stop you. The only thing it brought you was, that you landed on your foot, with your butt while also twisting it in a painful way. 

(A/N: You know, I thought about it, Leaving you hanging right here. However a)  I should not end all my chapters the same, you could get bored and b) I’m not evil.)

Pain shot up from your foot, as your tears began to form in your eyes. “Fuck, Y/N.” Simon and Sebastian seemed next to you in mere seconds. Carefully they lifted you off the ground and gently removed your foot from under you. It hurt like hell.

“Is she alright?”, one of the bouncers came towards you from the entrance, having heard the commotion. 

“Hey, can you move your foot?” Simon asked. You gave it a try, whining instantly. Crying even more you shook your head, your brain was way too foggy to come up with a smart ass reply. 

“Where were you?” yelled an otherwise rather quiet Simon. 

“Getting our jackets...” began Mary.

“She was drugged and you left her alone? Are you serious Mary?” Lizzy yelled too, her face enraged.

“How do we know she really was drugged? Maybe she just played it to get away from that man?” Mary suggested in an annoyed tone. 

“What the fuck? Did you look at her? Does she seem like a normal drunk to you? You have seen her drunk before, but never like this!”, came Lizzy's angry reply.

“Also from what I saw in the beginning, she sucked his fucking face off! Didn’t seem like she hated it.” Simon countered. 

“Why did you even leave her alone in the first place? None of this would have happened! Lucas you have no brain of your own anymore?”, Sebastian joined their yelling. The statement made Lucas' face turn the darkest shade of red. 

“Fucking pathetic. Lets get her to the emergency room, someone order an uber?”Simon turned around angrily, and he and Lizzy helped you up. Each of them supported you as you hobbled down towards the streets. The way from the Club to the ER was gone in a blur. You couldn’t remember most of it. One minute you were leaving the club and in the next you laid on a bed in the ER. ‘How did you get here?’

You looked around for your friends, but the room was empty besides Simon who was sitting next to your bed with a worried expression. Your head felt clearer, you cleared your throat.

“So what did the doctor say, Simon? What's the damage?”, better get it over with.

“Well.. bad news first. You have a bruised foot and a hyperextended ligament. As a consequence you have to wear a bandage and walk on crutches for the next month at least.”

You sighed. It seemed like he wasn’t even finished with the bad news yet.  

“You also got a few bruises on your arms, legs and back. Buut the Good news– they've given you something to counteract the effects of the drugs, but you'll probably still have to sleep it off, to fully feel better.”

“Better?” you laughed “I feel like I’ve been hit by a truck. Anything is better than this..”

“I know..” he said as he patted your head. “Listen, they want to keep you here overnight, but just call me in the morning and we will pick you up and drive you home, ok?”

Defeated, you nodded, he squeezed your hand and left soon after. Leaving you alone in the empty room. The rest of the night was uneventful. The nurses checking up on you from time to time, bringing you more water. Sadly they also woke you up at 6 to check your vitals again and give you painkillers. After one final talk with the doctor, getting instructions from him for the next weeks and your crutches, you were ready to go home. 

As promised Simon picked you up, he even cleaned your apartment from you and forbade you from helping. He was too kind. He even made Sebastian shop some groceries for you, which he brought over. So you didn’t need to stress about that for the next couple of days. About two hours later they left, telling you to call if you needed something. 

You never had a wild birthday like that before, but somehow trouble seemed to find you. It was just a small consolation that nothing had happened to you the last months.

Still exhausted, you laid back on the couch, still in your yesterday's outfit. Closing your eyes as you enjoyed the silence. The ping of your phone ringing loud through the quietness of your apartment. You grabbed your phone and held it above your face. It was from Simon, he left not even a minute ago. Did he forget something? You opened your Phone.

– I totally forgot to tell you something. I meant to wish you a happy birthday from the man from the club last night. He also wished for you to get well soon. –

A second message followed.

– You remember? The one you made out with? He said his name was Cooper. –

Cooper…You knew that name. There was only one person that came to your mind with that exact name. Alarm Bells were going off in your head, but whatever they gave you in the hospital was working. You weren’t shaking or panicking, you were rather calm, what confused you. 

That couldn’t be true, no. Surely you would have recognized him, even in the dim light of the club. It wasn’t that dark, was it? You rested your phone on your chest and began thinking about last night. Trying to remember, you realized that reconstructing the evening would be way harder than you thought. There were a lot of gaps in your memories and many were quite foggy. Perhaps it was because of the drugs mixed in your drink.

Sighing you closed your eyes, attempting to recollect what the stranger looked like. He was tall, had a small beard, you didn’t remember his eye or hair color, but his hair was a bit longer? You were unsure. You remembered his large hands on your body, holding your head in place while kissing you. He was strong for sure. 

‘Think straight!’ you warned yourself, already starting to feel hot again. Just thinking about it still turned you on. ‘If that was Cooper, the man from that concert. You were fucked.’ 

You tried to arrange your thoughts. Yes, you made out with him, a serial killer, and you liked it, you felt disgusted. ‘You didn’t know it was him. Why would he even be there? The possibility was close to zero’ Suddenly you remembered something. 

Didn’t you drink from his drink? Of course you were drunk before, but after that everything went downhill. Recalling how super drunk and tired you felt soon afterwards. It would all make sense.

Except… Why did he bring you back to your friends then? Perhaps it was a weird coincidence? 

Maybe you should ask Simon if his name was really Cooper. Maybe he misunderstood? That looked like a good option. Opening your phone, you started to answer Simon as a new message came in. 

It was from an unknown number. A simple: – Happy Birthday Sweetheart. –

It couldn’t be, you changed your number. Not many people called you that and you faintly remember Cooper calling you like that. Before you could wonder about it more, a second message from the same number appeared. What you read then made your heart freeze in fear, your pulse increased and hands started shaking, which made reading the message harder.

– You know, you were always nervous and so easily startled, like a cute little doe. Constantly on alert and looking around, to run away, at the slightest noise. Though if there were a little accident to happen. Where will you go now little doe, if you can’t even run? –

(A/N: nvm i am evil)

[ellesthots]

Fateful Beginnings

X. “discernment”

read on AO3 🦇

parts: previous / next

plot: back in your respective hometowns, you navigate a sudden shift in family finances. Bruce Wayne contemplates an identity shift.

pairing: battinson!bruce wayne x fem!reader

cw: 18+, health issues, chemotherapy, debt, substance use

words: 3.1k

a/n: i feel like this chapter is kinda the end of the setup. i’ve had a lot of fun subverting expectations of Batman’s identity usually being kept secret, and seeing how that impacts the story to have it be known so immediately. ahhh i’m very excited to keep writing <3

You did your best to shower as quickly as possible, ransacking your medicine cabinet behind the mirror while the water was heating up. Toothbrush, toothpaste, you had it all back at home, and it went into the trash. Shampoo, conditioner, body wash, all did the same after you used up what you could and jumped out of the shower, wrapping yourself in a single towel you were fine with leaving behind. As you walked back into the main room, you stopped for a moment. With the sheets off the bed, the kitchen empty, and the rest of the room deserted besides what was left of your luggage, it felt final. Gotham was finally being abandoned and you could go back to the safety of hometown life.

Sweats, tee, sneakers. The plane ride was going to feel massively long with how much anticipation was in your bones thinking about being able to make your mom's appointment. You'd clarified with your dad with a text message and he responded that her treatment was at 3. Even if the plane left by noon, that was 9 to them--you'd be home by 2, could head straight from the airport to her chemo. Luggage zipped, key in hand, you nearly made it out the door before remembering you had edibles sitting in your nightstand. You couldn't technically have it in your apartment, and you definitely couldn't bring it past TSA... you shoved it in your pocket to discard in a public trashcan and made your way to the lobby. You gave the keys and your name to the same young woman, and walked out of the lobby for the final time. Damn. I'm really done here. I'm done with Gotham. I just need to make it on my plane. Then I'm gone.

Bruce was slumped down in his chair trying to avoid passersby. You slipped in beside him and yanked your thick luggage between your legs. He sat up and nodded at you as he buckled, and you did the same. As you reached to click the seatbelt in, the edibles slipped out of your pocket and fell at his feet. Shit. He reached down, read the package, and his brow furrowed. "Marijuana?"

You laughed. Hadn't he ever seen it before? "Yeah uh, I can't take it with me to the airport or leave it here." You shrugged and held your hand out expectantly, but he hesitated.

His eyes scanned your face, confused. "You do marijuana?"

Now you were looking at him with confusion. He'd never done it? Drops were hardcore; weed was legal in Gotham, it was legal in most states now. You'd gone to a dispensary just around the corner from your complex to get it, surely he had experience. "Sometimes. Why are you looking at me like that?" A slight defense crept into your tone; people drank alcohol all the time, why was it strange to have edibles?

He gave the slightest shake of his head and mumbled. "I just don't see the point."

"I don't get the point of drinking alcohol either, but,"

"I don't drink. I don't do any substances."

You whipped your head toward him. "Like ever?"

"I need to be clear at a moment's notice." He gestured for you to click your seatbelt in, dropped the edibles in your lap, and pushed on the gas.

You sat in silence for most of the ride there, and just before he took the exit toward the dropoff lane you held them out to him. "Here. Take them." You paused. "Please."

He shot a glare at you, nearly missing the exit. "Why?"

"You don't have to take them or anything, I just can't have them on me at security." You shrugged and he begrudgingly obliged, tucking them into his pant pocket. He pulled to the right and stopped, unlocking the car. You sat for a moment, staring at all the passengers going in, all the couples embracing each other with heartfelt goodbyes. Your heart throbbed. You wanted that. You wanted to be held, you wanted someone to miss you—someone that didn't have to, like parents. Someone that liked you enough for you, as you were, for no reason other than enjoyment and care. Already in your mid-twenties you were beginning to wonder if that would ever happen for you, and it didn't help to be sitting in a car with the most frustrating, cold man imaginable while looking at so much warmth and love.

He hesitated before asking what had been on his mind since City Hall. “How did you know it was me?”

You hesitated just the same, then shrugged. “I don’t know, i just… knew?” How else could you express just how unique his eyes were? You turned toward him and met his available gaze. His eyes were so distinctive... you couldn't even quite place the color, further puzzling you as to how you had matched him so immediately to the vigilante. Maybe that was the whole thing—his eyes were so unplaceable. Sitting between a gray and blue with no particular lean to one or the other. You hadn't seen anything like it. "Thank you." A smile was easily conjured for him, sympathy and guilt fueling it. "I know I pushed my way into your home. And again, I won't tell anyone. Promise." You cleared your throat and averted your eyes as you popped open the passenger door and grabbed your luggage.

He didn't respond until the door was almost shut. "I know. Have a safe flight."

You hid your smile as you shut the door behind you and walked through to the lobby of the airport. You were just in time to get in line for TSA and still make it to your terminal. You shuffled around in your purse to find your ID and pulled up the virtual ticket on your phone. God. You were finally going to be home.

You woke to the pilot over the intercom: "Good afternoon folks, we have arrived in Seattle, Washington. It is now 1:39pm as we pull into the terminal. The weather is a comfortable 73 degrees with partly cloudy skies. Alaska Airlines thanks you."

Waiting for you in the lobby was your mother and father, but your eyes quickly landed on your mother's new wheelchair. She looked frail, with more deep-set wrinkles exaggerated by her new thinness. A lump formed in your throat. He'd said she'd gotten worse. You hoped it wasn't impossibly worse, but soon you would find out more information. You hid your surprise and ran to them with open arms. Your mother started weeping, pointing out how much more grown up you looked. "Your updates on Facebook didn't do you justice," She complimented. Thankfully her voice was unchanged.

Your dad drove you all straight from airport parking to her doctor's office. Chills traveled up your spine remembering the times you'd sobbed alone in your car wondering if the chemo would work, if the medicines that made her vomit and cry in the middle of the night when she thought no one was listening would be worth it. Only to end up back here. But, you reminded yourself, with so much more time than some people got.

Your dad looked tired, so you told him you'd take your mom inside. She was happy to get some time alone with you, chattering on with questions about what exactly Gotham had been like. "I've heard so much about it. Your dad focuses on the bad things now more than I do, he's been worried sick. Especially with all the explosions. Those did worry me I'll admit. But you're back now! We got your room ready, and Walter is so excited to see you! Ever since we made the room up he has been sitting at the foot of your bed." Walter was the family cat your mother got about seven years ago when she was first diagnosed; he was her therapy cat, and he'd taken to everyone in the house. You were excited to see him, you'd missed him tons.

The receptionist smiled when you walked into the clinic, gesturing for you to follow her to a room down the hall. "Mrs. Y/L/N, how are you doing? This room is ready for you." As you wheeled your mom in and sat her next to the IV, you pulled a chair over to sit nearby. You noticed it wasn't already pulled close—did people normally not accompany their relatives, friends, neighbors to their appointments? It saddened you to think about someone having to endure chemotherapy alone. You'd never do that to her.

About halfway through some more casual conversation—the neighbors were doing great, excited to see you, your dad had been working on a back porch for them to spend nights looking at the sunsets together, she'd stocked the fridge with all your favorites, asked about your classes, and gushed to the nurses about how you were now a soon to be college graduate. She also expressed sorrow about having you come back so early and miss graduation, to which you immediately and profusely told her not to worry. You were so glad to be back, and grateful to just do everything you could. You told her how you'd be looking for a job this summer.

A nurse walked in and gently reminded you both about payment. Your mom gestured to her purse sitting at the table opposite her and you went to find her credit card. Long ago your family had abandoned debit, as the mounting costs of having cancer were too much to front all at once. You hurried to the receptionist and stood in line behind a mother and young kid with a bald head. God, kids shouldn't have to go through this. No one should have to. "Miss Y/L/N?"

"Yes, this is for Y/L/N." You held out the family credit card but the receptionist cocked her head at you with a furrowed brow.

"Oh hon, your balance is paid."

You stopped. What? "Uh, I'm sorry, I don't think I've paid yet." You stared at her as she clicked a few buttons and focused on her screen.

She shook her head. "Nope, but an anonymous benefactor has paid your remaining balance and left a card on file." She smiled over at you. "Must be your lucky day!" She clicked a few things with her mouse and walked over to the printer, handing you an invoice. In bold print next to the mountain of numbers which had previously had a negative in front was a new 0 next to PAID.

Concerned, you rushed back to your mother's room. She noted your concern at once. "Y/N, what is it?" She moved toward you enough to get the monitor to start beeping to stay put.

You stared down at the paper. "It, it says it's paid. By an anonymous person, I don't, I don't know."

You fell back in your seat as you handed your mom the paper. She pored over it, then shrieked with relief. "Honey, this is a blessing. I can't believe it!" Tears came to her eyes and she looked around. "My phone, I need to tell Thomas,"

"Here, I'll call him." You took out your phone with clammy hands and dialed him. This was... unbelievable. The debt had been well above six figures. Each treatment was a few thousand dollars, with a month-long course going above thirty thousand. Not to mention the massive cost of the at-home medications she had to take multiple times per day that weren't covered by insurance.

Your dad shouted happily, saying he was going to order everyone pizza tonight. "Golly," he sounded on the verge of tears as well. "Looks like luck might be on our side."

As you helped your mom out of the clinic and into the car, your parents embraced each other and danced in place in the parking lot. Your mind was occupied, still in shock. If they had their balance paid, if all the costs coming up were covered, your dad's job at the school would be more than enough to sustain the family. Maybe they could even retire. He'd been saving up his 401k to pay off the balance in one lump sum, though he was only halfway there. It was nice to see them celebrating, but you had a strange feeling in your stomach. Who had it been? Who could have known? Your mother wasn't keeping her diagnosis a secret; many neighbors had been very supportive, and she had many friends who were decently well off that had helped your family when things got rough. But none of them had nearly enough money to do something like that.

As your dad pulled up to Domino's, it hit you like a ton of bricks. It had to be him. There was no other person who could afford it. But how had he known? Did he snoop? Did it even matter?

It had to be Bruce fucking Wayne.

Bruce dragged his pointer finger along the embossed lettering—LEMON LIME THC GUMMY. He was worn out, but could not possibly sleep. The night had been shockingly uneventful with only a few carjackings on his radar. Even the walkie talkie Gordon had lent him from the station was quiet. The night had ended early, yet he still felt tense with untapped energy. Pulling out his phone from his nightstand he Googled marijuana and sleep which elicited clear results: Cannabis may improve sleep quality by helping people fall asleep faster and wake up less often at night. Sigh. He checked the dosage instructions on the back of the tin and pulled off a small piece. Here goes nothing.

Immediately after swallowing he started to feel fearful. What if you had poisoned it? A final blow? Your last revenge? He pictured your eyes meeting his from the passenger side earlier that day. Again, I won't tell anyone. Promise. He thought your eyes were too kind not to mean it, but he still walked up the stairs over to Alfred's room. He was still up reading the paper when he walked in.

"Alfred, I'm gonna be taking some weed tonight." As soon as the words left his mouth he wanted to scream with embarrassment. Here he was, in his late twenties, telling his guardian that he was talking drugs. Non lethal ones at that.

Alfred peered up from over his papers with a small bit of surprise. Bruce had never shown interest in drugs before, and it felt a bit awkward, like he was admitting something terrible to a parent. He tried to make his reaction measured and interested. "Oh. Okay! Sounds... good!"

Bruce shifted his weight between feet, wanting to fall through the floor. He was still nervous of how he would react. Would his face melt? Would he have a panic attack, "Yeah. I'll be in my room." Alfred, having known him all his life, easily read between the lines.

"Do you want me to, check on you?" He paused halfway through, not wanting to come across condescending. Bruce seemed anxious. Alfred tried to smile at him. The kid averted his gaze.

"I got them from Y/N. They're just for sleep." He turned to leave as Alfred continued.

"Okay. Uh, have a good rest."

Bruce mumbled "Thanks." before disappearing back to his room. He laid in waiting facing the ceiling with his arms crossed across his chest, looking small and worried. Why had he trusted you so implicitly? What if your kind words at the airport had been nothing more than a ruse? He needed to be smarter than that. And the crosswalk? How he'd almost hit someone? He couldn't believe it. You clouded his thoughts more than he'd even realized. You weren't stupid and he couldn't ignore the possibility that you knew exactly what you were doing. But what were you doing? You didn't like him. You left Gotham to care for your mother's returned cancer. You were so ready to rid yourself of the city. And he did believe you when you said you wouldn't tell anyone. You puzzled him.

He decided to take a hot shower to try and relieve some extra stress before the weed kicked in. The heat coaxed his muscles to relax, his shoulders to drop, and his eyes to close. He focused on the sounds of the water, the feeling of the soap on his tired, chronically injured body as his hands ran over his bruises. He forgot the time while he was in there, until he started feeling floaty. Blinking to try and shake the sensation, he stepped out of the shower and threw on a pair of sweats. He sat on the edge of his bed and felt its emptiness. His vision was slightly blurred, reminiscent of when he got hit too hard in the head. It wasn't as jarring as he was anticipating, and let himself relax back to his initial position staring up at the ceiling.

His walls were painted black, and that made him a bit nervous. Through his periphery he saw the empty darkness of his room and turned on his bedside lamp. The soft incandescent glow felt warm on his skin and he relaxed into it. Thoughts began creeping up at the edges of his mind. Your eyes gave it away. I don't know, I just knew. Your words fluttered around the room to dizziness. That was possibly the worst answer you could have given, knowing that unless he wanted to reduce visibility while fighting and wear some sort of glasses, he could be recognized any time. In the haze of his high he pictured himself in front of him. Bandaged, bruised, melancholic, isolated. His hair dark and in his eyes. It came to him akin to an epiphany: he needed to make himself more distinguishable from his nightlife. He looked like someone who might be Batman. How instantly you knew him. There had to be someone else like you. You weren't an anomaly, no, you couldn't be.

He got out his journal and started scribbling on the page.

Me now: dark, casual, isolated, angry, unfriendly, critical

Batman: dark, isolated, angry, unfriendly, critical

Too many similarities.

Then he wrote down the opposite: bright, fashionable, connected, easygoing, friendly

As his high peaked he looked out the window at the streets of his city. It hit him like a ton of bricks settling into the pit of his stomach. He needed to become a Wayne—public facing and more inconspicuous, he needed to create distance from the two halves of him. He needed to become so different as to practically gaslight the people of Gotham into discarding their suspicions as madness. He fell back onto the mattress. He couldn't hesitate.

He had to become Bruce fucking Wayne.

[ultimate-shipper-blog]

Substitute Teacher Steve Au

Delilah felt nervous. She ran into her little brother Paul in the hall because neither of them were looking in the correct direction...too nervous.

She hurried into her English class and grabbed her seat. The class's energy was off the charts. Everyone was chatting and gossiping.

"-sub! Can you believe THE St-"

"I just don't understand? Arent they fam-"

Uh oh. She thinks she understands now and pulls out her flip phone to type out a quick text to Paul to warn him. It's too late. He already texted her first.

"Code purple"

"Fuck."

"Language B!"

"Shit."

He laughs as he walks into the classroom. Someone slaps her shoulder as if they're trying to tell her "Hey! He looked in your direction!!!!"

Sitting on her teacher's desk is retired pop icon Steve Harrington. He lights up when he sees her looking at him and waves to her. He's waving so fast his hand is a blur.

"Del what the hell is happening?" Mandy, her best friend is looking at her expectantly.

"I-"

"Ok class! Attendance time!!"

'Adams'

'Andrews'

'Chase'

'Finch'

"Henderson!"

"..."

"C'mom B," he looks at her disappointed.

"Here," she grumbles.

A girl in the back raises her hand.

"Can this wait until after the attendance is taken?"

"Unfortunately not Mr. Harrington I just have to know, how do you know Delilah? Why do you call her B? I mean out of everyone we were not expecting you to be here for her." She says the last part kind of like a sneer.

Delilah knew she wasn't the most popular but she made a choice to stay out of the spotlight.

"Well...student-"

"Sam."

"Sam, I'm not here for Delilah."

Gasps went around the room.

"I'm also here for Paul!" His famous bright smile is shining bright. "He's getting his braces off today! Isn't that exciting! Gosh I remember when his dad got his off. Brings a tear to my eye."

Delilah sinks lower into her seat.

"As for the nickname-"

She shoots up, ramrod straight.

"Um Uncle Steve you don't really have to-"

"Now B it's nothing to be embarrassed about. When Del's mom was pregnant with Paul we told her that she wouldn't be the baby anymore. She was so frustrated that was the only name she responded to for six months!"

Sam pipes up again, "so B is short for-"

"Baby." Snickers went around the room. Delilah groans. "Obviously we couldn't go around calling her baby that's weird. So we shortened it, nickname. It also helps because she's baby Henderson, helps to distinguish the difference between them all."

Steve gives her a soft smile, like he's still imagining her as a toddler.

"As most of you may know I retired about five years ago along with my boyfriend." (Gay marriage was not legal yet but she's working on it.)

Josh's hand shoots up. "Your boyfriend famous metal musician Eddie Munson?"

"Yes student in the back, we decided it was time to retire and enjoy our time together. Then I got bored. I was always planning on being a teacher if music didn't work out so I became a sub. We have a house here to see the kids and I knew I wanted my first assignment to be one where I could see my favorite Hendersons."

Ok she can't be mad at him. She loves him so much and he obviously is just doing what he can to be closer to her.

"Uncle Steve-"

Uncle is whispered around the room.

"I appreciate you coming here but-"

"Henderson I'd appreciate it if you stayed after school to help me grade papers. I can give you a ride home. Uncle Eds is taking Paul to the orthodontist now so you don't have to worry about driving him."

Conveniently, beeping was heard outside along with the sound of a motor like an engine revving. The students all ran to the window to see what was going on and were shown Paul with his head down running to the convertible.

Poor kid. Everyone would be talking about this for at least a week.

Paul looked over at the window along with Eddie, when he saw Steve he blew him a kiss. As soon as Paul was buckled up he sped off.

Steve sighed wistfully and then headed back to the desk.

"Alright everyone! Let's learn!"

[auckie]

Honestly. Adding balsamic vinegar to something could be considered “lezzing out”. Accidentally having your phone set to the Spanish keyboard so that balsamic vinegar when typed through swype text autocorrects to ‘mi batshit vagina’ can sometimes be considered “Lezzing out”. Doing a crazy quick but shy little two step in the electrical section of Lowe’s— that’s right, that’s lezzing the fuck out. Now, not everything is lezzing out, because I think there has to be a balance for some people, like maybe, I dunno. ‘Rustic as fuck’. And they’re not always opposites, like they can happen at the same time. Installing pointless barn doors, like on a bathroom or cabinet, is not lezzing out, but it’s rustic as fuck and it sucks. Using an allen wrench is lezzing out and rustic as fuck and pretty good. Calling it that instead of a hex key are those things too. Saying minge is lezzing out but not rustic at all. No one says minge anymore and it’s a shame because it’s really funny. Yknow I took some of them fly amarita amanina whatever legal but scary, yet quaint red and white toadstool ass mushroom gummies along with bootleg adderall chewables and then chased it with an entire bottle of moscato by accident and I can admit it’s neither lezzing the fuck out of me, nor rustic as shit it’s just. I’m scared. I’m in bed scared and I gotta get up early and go to the post office and bank and I’m wishing I was just munching on minge right about now. There’s a lot of awful slang for vagina that’s really funny, like cartoon lumberjack Phil and Lil’s dykeass mom type vernacular like calling it a clam. A poonani. Gash. The ole axe wound. Chowing down on some beaver. Rippin into that roast beast manwich. Parting the meat curtains. The clandestine cloaca. When I was little I tackled a boy who thought girls shit our their vagina to the ground and held his eye open while I dropped a pinecone around it. I always tell people that story but it’s important to remember I didn’t do it because he said he thought girls pooped out their front UGH EW I forgot about front butt. Fupa. My fucking pufa. Interchangeable pussy upper frontal area and such. sorry so I didn’t do that because he was wrong about where poop came from but because he made a border joke at me. I never hit his eye; I knew what I was doing. That was lezzing out. I was lezzing the fuuuuck out in third grade dude I was wearing a fleece vest and wire frame square glasses like my life depended on it. The boot cut jeans and sketchers. Not very rustic, which is for the best. Children rarely are, nor should they be rustic as fuck, let alone at all, but boys and girls of all ages can lez with the best of ‘em under the right parenting and guidance, the right conditions.

[transwicky]

Ollie and Wicky eloped.

Everyone feels offended and they think maybe the others got invited but the truth was nobody did.

They eloped winter break junior year, but everyone thinks they got married after graduating.

Until Bitty is stressing out planning his and Jack's wedding and Ollie is like "this is why we eloped junior year" and Bitty freezes and stares at him.

"Junior year?"

"yeah. My student visa was expiring for the year and we had plans to get married anyways, so Pace' suggested eloping earlier than planned so I could get a green card. Fuck, Tango was literally the only one there as our witness and to tell immigration "yeah they genuinely love each other, it's kinda gross how in love they are with the PDAs" so. We never had a real ceremony, just did paperwork for it. It helped that we were broke college students who had been dating since our freshman year."

Bitty is floored.

He texts the others asking if they knew.

They are all HORRIFIED to know they've been thinking the worst of Ollie and Wicky when the only person who went was the freshman that was the honest and genuine tadpole that Wicky pretty much adopted, and probably because there was no way immigration would not believe the kid.

Bitty hesitantly asks if they'd want a ceremony, and Ollie shrugs.

"it's not a big deal to me overall. I think it'd be nice, but I don't need one. I think Pacer would like it though, but his family is also kinda fucked up so I don't know for sure how he'd feel about it. I've offered though. He said no."

Bitty asks Tango.

"He and his cousin planned their weddings when they were eight, Bitty. He wants a ceremony. He doesn't need one, he knows that, but he wants one, he just doesn't want Ollie to think it's something he needs to do to like, prove they love each other or something. It's from the fucked up childhood. His mom was kinda stupid. Said weddings were proof that they love each other. So Wicky says no when Ollie offers 'cause he remembers that and doesn't want Ollie to feel like he has to do it as proof, because he already knows Ollie loves him. It's stupid. People are stupid. Why are people so stupid?"

"Good Lord, that's the million dollar question, Tango."

And so he talks things out with Tango.

Tango gets in touch with Wicky's cousin.

She gives him the old baby wedding planner they did as kids, and the one Wicky had started when he and Ollie first made plans to get married after graduation (the baby one was for cute little laughs at what 8 year old Wicky wanted, it wasn't actually what Tango asked her for. Nobody is complaining).

She sits Ollie down. Tells him what their moms told them as kids, and that Wicky will never tell him he wants a ceremony because of it, and especially since they're already married.

So Ollie has to finish planning things. They can have the ceremony on the day they actually got married ("Make it romantic! He'll love it!") And it can be in their backyard, even ("where doesn't matter, so long as the people you both care about are there!").

SMH is invited, that much is clear.

Bitty is Ollie's best man, Tango is Wicky's, because Ollie knows Wicky wouldn't want anyone else there unless it's Johnson (which is true).

But Johnson is allowed to wed people legally, they have no idea why, but he can, and Ollie knows Wicky would LOVE that.

The ceremony really is in the backyard, and it's covered in snow, and Wicky comes home from work to their friends and families over and holy shit Ollie did all of this?!

And his dad just grins, gives him the suit he got married in, and his own father got married in, and his father had married in, and Wicky is crying by the time he's standing with Ollie at the end of the aisle, with Tango as his best man, and Johnson is the one marrying them.

He whispers thank you before Johnson starts talking.

It's absolutely everything he could have wanted for their wedding.

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

Every generation in my family starts going fully blind (vs "legally blind without correction") at some point. My aunt Florence went blind in her 30s, my grandma in her 70s, my mom hasn't fully gotten there yet but has been progressing along grandma's trajectory since her early 60s. I'm in my 30s now and my sight is so bad thatI can't see jack fucking shit without my glasses unless it's practically touching my nose.

When I finally lose my vision, I do sorta wonder how I'm going to introduce all my adult community (has only known me since going full visual lip reading) to the experience of tactile lip reading on my behalf. Because I'll need to, at least with a few people. And it's also been literal years since I used it, so will I still be able to pick up how mouths make sounds now?

I dunno. It's an interesting thought though.

I remember being about 6yrs old when I had my first isl lessons at school, and the teach had us read a biography about Helen Keller first, and showed us both printed and braille versions so we could understand the difference. I remember being so fascinated and overwhelmed by the idea that I could touch the words to understand them, and I remember that for the rest of my life when I read, my fingertips would skim along the line as if printed text left a texture behind to help me interpret its meaning.

But mostly I remember the passage in that biography where Helen first uses her fingers, her hands, her touch, to feel the shape, breath, and vibration of the sounds other people made. I had always done this myself, never fully realizing why it was important and being confused and distressed when people didn't like it. I have always had difficulty hearing without my sight or seeing without touch, and this was the first time I could remember someone sharing a similar experience. The idea that this happened to others was revelatory to me.

I speak only broken isl, as I only learned for a couple of years and no one but my mother ever learned with me. I do still read lips, to the point that I often have to put my glasses on when people are talking to me. I rely heavily on others being open to helping me understand them, and I think it can be easy for othersnot to realize that is happening. When they DO it is also common for them to begin treating me differently. As less competent and capable, less able to function in the world. The last isn't untrue, but the infantilization of the first two can make it hard to swallow.

I have been thinking about this a lot, and I have a very real question for non-deaf/blind people:

Can you stop what you're doing for a moment and imagine a world that is muffled in every way that matters? Where sound comes through almost like being underwater and every view was like peering through the hazy fog you can barely drive through, only it comes right up to your face. Imagine moving through that muffled experience of the world. This is NOT physically what it is like to be Deaf/Blind, but emotionally I think it isn't too far off. So the question is, what do you want your response to be when someone tells you they need help seeing and hearing you?

I do understand why tactile lip reading makes people uncomfortable. When I was a small child, even with tiny hands and a weak grip, grown adults would understandably flinch back if I tried to feel their lips or throat while they spoke. I don't fault them for it, but I do ask "well then what else can we do so that we are capable of communicating with each other?" If not tactile vocal cues, then perhaps isl and hand spelling as needed? Even braille notes? What CAN you offer people like me?

I don't ask this to be confrontational, but to give you all the chance to think about this before you need to have an answer.

People like me are about to find themselves with very little recourse or resource to navigate a world of escalating hostility to disability (among many other aspects of self). We are going to depend on people who love us being willing and able to BECOME those resources in many ways. Do you know ISL/ASL? Do you know how text readers work or how to maintain the equipment? Do you know how braille texts are made (hint, it's a process that means blind people are charged OBSCENE prices for accessible texts for the sake of profitting off us)? Do you know how we will safely move through town if we can no longer drive, get rides, or use public/medically assisted transportation? How about clothes, do you know how we dress? What clothes we can work with and what makes our lives harder? I know some deaf blind folks who prefer zips because it's a grab and go, and I prefer laces over any other kind of fastening because I can do them up entirely by feel as needed.

Basically, how have you learned to think about your role in the lives of your Deaf/Blind loved ones? And what do you know about how you may react to some of the accommodations and supports that help them navigate their world? Can you actually functionally accommodate us at all? The answer may be no, but if that's true I want people to understand how important it is to communicate that NOW rather than risk a loved one finding out when the rubber hits the road that they do not have the resources to make do and may need to prepare some.

It can be very important to have these talks with yourself, not just about what kind of ally/community you VALUE being vs what kind of support you can ACTUALLY FEASIBLY provide. It's okay if there's a difference, but please don't let that difference sneak up on you.