#but the typing in my bio is meaningless

[slug-demon]

look. proship vs anti-ship is another one of those debates that is treated too black and white for my tastes. i do not consider myself proship and a lot of people who choose to describe themselves as proship make content that makes me deeply uncomfortable and conflicts with my personal moral perception of the world. however i am STRONGLY anti-censorship and i feel like a lot of anti-ship people really do not understand the implications of the stuff they seem to want. like i hate to say it but i like ao3 because you can host just about anything there. you never have to worry about 'sensitive' topics being banned unjustly. and like, you can't really ban a topic all together in most situations because it blocks productive portrayal and discussion around real-life topics which is important. i would rather have uncomfortable and weird fanfic on the site i use than have to worry about the website being bought out or changing management or some shit and starting censoring any mention of 'distasteful' or 'inappropriate' topics. sometimes writing contains rape, incest and other uncomfortable topics in a non-glorifying or productive light and censoring those works would be unfair. also the idea of all art needing to have a purpose or a sort of productivity to it comes from capitalistic ideals about art as a product and not as expression, so i also don't think the gross underage incest rape fic should be censored either. if you start censoring, where will the line be drawn? how will you maintain the line? what will you do if societal and/or popular opinion of what should be allowed changes? it's all deeply rooted in capitalism and exclusion and othering/'i'm better than you' ways of thinking. so i'm not proship or anti ship i'm anti censorship and pro minding my damn business when something unrelated to me makes me uncomfortable. ao3 has tagging. block the tags from your searches. it is that easy.

[justadeadreaper]

I'm in love with a fictional man and I blame the 'tism for it. Aldbskdnen

As he's heavily tattooed, what does Jack-Pot think about more "cute" tattoos? One of my tattoos is a cat with fairy wings. 👀

ALSO!! Does he like cats? I have this massive rat bastard who enjoys being babied and carried like a child. Sleeps on my bed every single night and likes bothering people for pets and walking on them when they're laying down. 😭

This is going to be very long as I have so much to say

Jack-Pot is okayish with tattoos that can be deemed as "cute" or "silly" but it very much depends on the context of the tattoo and why you have it

Also sorry about this but I will be doing into a mini rant as I want to just make note of something as I know some people will ask about this. Yes, even though Jack-Pot is a highly religious man he has tattoos as tattoos are not a sin in the bible anymore

I will try to explain this as quickly as I can in the shortest amount of words but it starts in the Old Testament. In Leviticus it says to not put tattoos on your body but that is in the context of Elijah on Mount Carmel. At Mount Carmel worshippers of Baal were cutting themselves and letting the blood flow as to get Baal's attention and this would leave a permanent mark in the form of scars and a stain. God was just telling his followers to not get a permanent mark like a tattoo as it would associate them with the worshippers of Baal (plus some tattoo methods also drew out blood) and they should be different from that culture

But, now, those followers of Baal are not alive so it would be seen as okay to get a tattoo as you are not mixing yourself up with the followers of Baal. The only way it would probably not be okay is if the tattoo is disrespectful to God or it was a tattoo of a Demon

Like I said before, sorry about the rant but I needed to get that off my chest and if you want to date Jack-Pot get used to it as he will go into mini rants like that as he knows the context and every verse in the Bible. Plus he is the type of autistic that if you ask him a question about something he knows he will talk about it for hours

So Jack-Pot is okay with any tattoos from a religious standpoint but he also has two other things affecting his view of tattoos due to how he was raised. That is that tattoos are only for criminals and that if you have to get one it has to have some greater, deeper meaning

If you have a "silly" or "cute" tattoo either due to the style or what it is but it has a deeper meaning? He is perfectly fine with it. Jack-Pot will ask questions about why you got it and why that particular style or why it looks like that as he prefers to get hyper realistic tattoos with a lot of meaning behind them. It is not his taste but he is fine with it

If you have a "silly" or "cute" tattoo either due to the style or what it is but it does not have a deeper meaning? You will be getting side eyed. He will not directly say anything but the way he says 'Okay love.' hints at something being wrong but he learnt not to say anything after his brother kicked him in the balls after Jack-Pot said something about his brother's meaningless and cute tattoos. He does not see the point of getting something meaningless as that in his opinion is wasted skin especially for something so "silly" looking

Apart from that, you could probably convince him to get a cute tattoo if he loved you enough. It would probably have to be a matching tattoo that you both have to have the meaningfulness he wants but he would be fine if you asked him to get a matching set of teddy bears together. Also when he is a dad finally he would get tattoos of puppies that would follow behind the dog tattoo he already has

Here is a fun fact; originally I planned for him to have a cute, dumb hedgehog tattoo as to prove how much he loves someone but I could not choose on where to put it (that also reminds me that I need to add how he has stigmata on his hands and feet as I forgot to mention it in his bio and he has a whole backstory on why he got them in the first place)

Cats? He loves them! He grew up with a tabby cat called Rhubarb and a black and white cat called Snowpaw. So from a young age he grew up around cats which gave him a love of them

He loves them so much that he gets Makarov a pet cat in my Rewrite. One day he found a stray cat (I am debating on if it should be a Devon Rex, Lykoi, Sphynx, or another cat breed) that reminded him of Makarov as it had heterochromia, a missing front leg, and it had jet black fur. He picked it up and gave it to Makarov as he thought it was Makarov's birthday when it was not but Makarov kept the cat just because it gave him the stink eye and was not scared of him

That is how Makarov got his pet cat called "Lucifer" as that cat is as evil as its owner but Makarov spoils the thing. In return Makarov got Jack-Pot a ginger Maine Coon which Jack-Pot named "Lilith" to match Lucifer and he loves the cat like his own child. Most of the Konni soldiers have a game where they try and spot the two cats as they are always together somewhere on the base as they like to sit and judge the soldiers before going back to their owners for treats and cuddles

Also, another fun fact is that Jack-Pot has trained Lilith to bite at Milena's ankles and the cat does, because like their owner they do not like Milena. And she can not do shit against the cat as Makarov would kill her as his cat and Jack-Pot's are two peas in a pod that can not be without one another

He would baby your cat and carry it around all the time and he would get a mini bed for the cat to sleep on with their own little mini blanket. He is used to be walked on and being pestered for attention so he can deal with your cat doing that just fine

[butch-reidentified]

> gets gender affirming surgery

> hates trans women

make it make sense

normally I try to be polite but I've had an absolutely shit day and honestly, you're fucking vacuous beyond what I previously thought possible, so fuck that.

BOTH of those are factually incorrect assertions I have extensively addressed with great detail on this blog on multiple occasions, but you sent this ask without doing even the slightest bit of informing yourself about me or my views. you could have answered your own question lmfao. again, absolutely brainless.

my bio says "got top surgery as a proud woman." y'all believe woman is a gender (I don't, for the record). so if woman is a gender, and I call myself a woman, and "top surgery" is considered gender affirming for "non-women," then what someone needs to make sense of is how on earth you think that my elective mastectomy served a "gender affirming" purpose. this is a tier of irrational stupidity that earnestly causes me to feel a deep dread for the future of the species.

I don't hate trans-identified males, and I have broken down why that narrative is straight up BS propaganda nonsense many times, and I have dived onto the nuance about this and about my feelings toward trans-identified males many times. I hate many trans-identified males I have interacted with or read the misogynistic ramblings of, but I hate them for their misogyny in exactly the same way I hate any other misogynist. I do not start out by hating them for being trans-identified. I start out giving everyone a fair chance to be a decent person (unlike y'all lmao). If it seems like I hate trans-identified males just off rip BECAUSE they're trans, either you're misinformed by your own propaganda/making assumptions OR there might be a bit of a misogyny problem in the modern trans community that causes me and many women to wind up hating a large number of trans-identified males for being misogynists, but instead of perceiving that that's what's happening, y'all will just point and screech at the evil witches bc doing the former requires a modicum of critical thinking. it's just so much easier to shout "feminazi bitch!" and call it a day, isn't it?

If you really think that there's just no possible way that other people could simply not subscribe to gender identity ideology (GII) without it coming from a place of hate, you've crossed into religion. "Atheists are inherently on Satan's side" type mindset fr. I don't subscribe to any religious faith, and actually have outright criticisms of patriarchal religion in any form it takes, but I've never heard anyone on the left claim that not sharing in religious beliefs - or even having criticisms of misogyny and other bigotry within religious spaces - means I hate everyone who does and want them all dead; I only see that from devoutly religious conservatives. Yet the narrative we're all supposed to believe without question is that you either fully subscribe to gender identity ideology - which is inherently faith-based* - or you must hate trans people; you must literally want trans people dead. [never mind the absurdity of the belief that hating something or someone inherently entails desiring its total destruction. tell me, do you want every person you've ever hated to be murdered? do you want every concept you despise, every item you personally can't stand, wiped from existence? if yes, please seek help!]

*It is inherently faith-based because the foundation of gender identity ideology is how people feel. We are required to accept a male's "I feel like a woman" as proof that he literally is a woman, and that his motives are pure must never, ever, ever be questioned - even if this male does nothing to "transition," is wildly misogynistic, openly fetishizes his perceived womanhood, and/or blatantly takes advantage of being welcomed into women's spaces.

We are required to reject material reality and the actual definition of "woman" in favor of the materially meaningless circular definition "a woman is anyone who identifies as a woman." We are not allowed to ask for clarification as to what exactly he is identifying with that indicates womanhood.

We are expected to fully accept and preach the Gospel of Gender Identity: Every person has an innate Gender Identity. If one claims not to have an innate sense of Gender Identity, that person is either a liar or simply wrong about their own internal experience (note that this is the ONLY time it is okay to question someone else's internal identity!), and we are encouraged to "correct" the individual in question. Everyone can be accurately categorized as either Cis or Trans. Not only does everyone have an innate Gender Identity, but we are born with these - but also, your gender identity can change over time or be fluid! Everyone has an innate Gender Identity, but also, gender is inherently fluid. And above all else, one's Gender Identity must absolutely NEVER be questioned no matter the circumstances.

[ridebyldr]

I stabbed a guy in my tc's class

long time no see girls. this is a really concerning interaction but just wanted to share because i can't feel a thing anymore. everything is so numb.

as you all know, S is my bio teacher. so today in class, we were discussing genetic mutations in plants and stuff. he started to say something about earthworms. now the problem is i have a huge phobia. i genuinely physically panick even at the mention of its name. it's hard to even type this out. i can't recall any past trauma related to it but it's a fear that has caused me to behave really irrationally in the past. so ofc as he was explaining stuff i kind of jumped in my seat at the word. also, i did this in his previous class where he just kind of stared at me and then moved on. i don't know what he thought about my reaction then.

and a few classes before he was giving out our midterms paper and i just got one mark less than the maximum grade. me and another classmate got the highest grades. but we're overachievers so we went up to him to ask if he could increase our grade. he looked at my other classmate and congratulated him and said his result was already good enough while smiling. then when i asked about a diagram which i sort of messed up, he just said that it needs improvement and asked 'is that all'? so obviously that was time to leave. i went back to my seat. that day me and my friends who know about my feelings were sitting at the back. so i kinda bawled my eyes out quietly and hoped he didn't notice.

but maybe he did! cause today he asked... 'are you getting emotional again-?' but my friend cut him off and said that i was scared. he asked of what. i explained. he just smiled and said that while talking about it he would use the word 'blank' which he did throughout. it made me so happy to see someone like him care for my stupid feelings. i felt so peaceful then, like a little child.

but then a guy behind me, who is also my friend started to really graphically describe blank. so i tweaked and sort of smacked him lightly in the arm. BUT what i didn't notice was that i was holding a pen. so his arm legit started bleeding through his shirt. it was just a small cut but the bitch had to make a scene. S just continued with his lecture and later asked him to go to the nurse. now he didn't talk to me after class.

does he think i'm psycho? crazy? mentally unstable? it must've made him so confused and disappointed. i'm really sad. i don't know what will happen tomorrow. i have his class. if it gets big and i get like- suspended or something... that scares me.

but no matter what, i always have this sweet love. and also the ability to k1ll myself. so i'll just get through as many days as i can. it all seems meaningless without his presence anyway. like a tornado blowing by but there's a glass wall protecting me.

[subconsciousmysteries]

I'm removing type from my bio. I'm sick of the primitive narcissistic way people use enneagram and I'm not even going to be polite about it anymore. If you know anything about this shit you know that you're supposed to work on ALL your ego fixations, all nine of them. Go read Almaas. Most of all you're supposed to balance all nine lines that exist inside of you which basically represent all your fragmented warring selves. Enneagram is a powerful healing tool when used right because it allows you to better visualize the fragments of your personality that are struggling with each other and need to be unified to make you whole. or as MPD therapists call it, "integrated".

I'm much more interested in that than going in circles debating how people shallowly perceive me over the internet. Or shallowly trying to perceive other people over the internet. Stop this obsession with how you are perceived. It's navel-gazing self conscious 4 bullshit that has become the promoted norm in this community. No wonder everybody is "mistyping" themselves as 4s, you have to be a walking dysfunctional 4 case who is obsessed with categorizing how others perceive you in order to fit in to this community at all. Stop looking for your true type. Stop thinking your One True Type even exists, cuz it probably doesnt. Start living life without the idea of type in your head and then during reflection time you can use the enneagram framework to see if you find patterns in your behaviors and feelings, and the behaviors and feelings of others. You'll find heaps. Remember if there is no movement, ie if you're saying something is "3" but there is no wing action, and no 9 or 6 movement to back it up and connect it back to the whole, your observation is kind of meaningless.

People are holding back so much authenticity in this community because they're scared of getting retyped if some sanctimonious wanker puritan typologer thinks that one thing they said is out of line with the way they were previously typed. It's such a shame because we draw the most typological insight when we are being totally authentic about our experiences and allowing ourselves to speak whatever comes up and relate to whatever comes up, which could really be fucking anything. When we limit ourselves to one core type or one tritype or one xwx xwx xwx, we make our scope of self realization so needlessly limited. The only people this serves are neurotic, narcissistic busybodies on the internet with a terribly unbalanced 1-4 line who want to turn everyone into a caricature for the sake of their own fragile, self-serving ideologies.

The truth is we have all nine types in us and we will exercise all of them at different moments. it's unhealthy image type nonsense (specifically unhealthy 1-4 line nonsense, also 5/6 resistance of ambiguity you're guilty too) to believe otherwise.

[clarrise-rose]

I Love-Hate Being A Lesbian.

I’m a lesbian. There’s no other way to say it, I’m a raging lesbian. It’s beautiful, and wonderful in so many ways. I love being a lesbian, and I have ever since I figured it out. That doesn’t mean it’s easy.

I knew I liked women long before I knew I was a lesbian. At first I thought I was bisexual, and came out to my parents as such. I was twelve at the time. They wanted me to keep it quiet. I was young, and didn’t fully know what I was talking about, and my grandparents were Catholic, what would they say? (As I grew into the identity, I found that my gran had nothing to say on the pride pins she found on my blazer as she took it to wash.) It felt disheartening, but they hadn’t demanded I stay straight, or deem me a child of the devil, so I took it as a win. I suppose they took me still liking boys as a win, too. They’d told me the world was dangerous for people like me, so knowing I was still straight-passing must’ve been a small reprieve.

The first time I came out, it was with a terrible joke. I thought long and hard about it, and spent far too long deliberating and hoping it’d go well, and trying to prepare for the worst. The second time, I texted my mum that I was a lesbian. I was signing up to do volunteer work, and they asked me my sexuality. I wanted to avoid any confusion, if my mum thought I was bisexual and my work thought I was a lesbian. It felt so easy then. Shame that that didn’t stay.

When I finally downloaded FaceBook and made an account, I had lesbian in my bio. I saw no reason not to have it, it was as much a part of me as being a D&D nerd or musical theatre enthusiast was. My dad didn’t seem to agree. He told me to take it out, since I had family friended on there, and he wanted me to come out to them properly. I didn’t see the big deal, but I took it out anyway. I don’t want to come out to them properly, I don’t see why I should. What does it matter if I’ve got a wife or a husband, or no spouse at all? I’m still me, aren’t I? I took it out anyway.

My mum and dad are scared. Scared of the homophobia I’ll face, scared of the unknown, scared of the world around me so violent against my type. And they have reason to be, sure, reasons that aren’t my fault. I feel bad anyways. They wanted a simple daughter, who’d get a boyfriend and a husband and two kids behind a picket fence, or something along those lines. Then I said the word ‘Lesbian’ and it all came shattering down. Then they had to worry about me holding hands with a girl. Then they had to worry about me going out on a date and coming back in a body bag, because I saw the wrong homophobes at the wrong time. No parent deserves that fear. And I’m the one who inflicted it on them. All because I didn’t want to hold hands with a boy.

I haven’t had a proper relationship before. I had three short-term boyfriends by the time I was in Primary 7, meaningless, of course. My first girlfriend was my best friend, who I dated for a year or two. We’re still friends now, and I love her to bits, if less romantically. But, outside a couple Discord relationships that went… less that well, I’ve had nothing. The dating pool in a small town full of NEDs (Non-Educated Delinquents), half of which are men, and another quarter are homophobic, is rather small if you can believe it. I don’t get the standard girlhood things, of talking about crushes on boys and your dream date with a guy. I wouldn’t trade being a lesbian for the world, but I yearn for those experiences of girlhood more than anything.

Sometimes, I really hate it. I look online and the world hates lesbians. I look in ‘safe’ spaces and there’s discourse over how queer is too queer to be a lesbian. A boy calls someone a faggot as they walk past me in a hall, not knowing how sharp that word feels when it’s not a joke between you and your mates who know the pain of being queer. I look at my parents and I mourn the little girl they wanted. The little girl who could look away from all that gay stuff, who could brush slurs off like words, who wanted some stupid husband and a stupid picket fence. They’ll never say it to my face because they’re the best parents I’ve ever known, and I wouldn’t trade them for anything. (I look at the little girl and wonder if I’d trade myself. I can’t say ‘no’ without a quiver in my voice.)

I don’t know how to deal with this type of thing. I don’t know what the right way to feel about this is, or if there even is one. Do I suck it up? Do I cry? Scream? Do I lock my heart up and find a nice man with a big bank account? Do I stare longingly at girls, and hate myself for it as much as I love myself for it? They don’t teach this stuff in school, so I’m stuck. Stuck and, worst of all, scared. Being queer is radical, and proud, and loud, and I love it. But sometimes I want that quiet life, with a picket fence. Sometimes I wonder if I’ve let myself down, being myself. I wonder if I’d have been happier closeted and included, than proud and not.

Deep down, I know I wouldn’t have been. There’s no fighting me being a lesbian. But, when I look at my mum and dad, I can’t help but wish that there was.

[eiyutan-no-mikoto]

WIP

〈Japanese〉

【第五話　カ災対、初出動】

「TANABATAが時空の歪みを検出！　予想通り、姉御港西部、CORE南部からだ！」

　カイジュウ災害対策室、略してカ災対。その本部。不滅親衛隊最高司令部と併設された施設。そこにサイレンが響く。

「生体パター��は？」

「パターンシアン。カイジュウです。」

　カ災対の室長が部下に問う。やはりそうだったか、という顔をした。

　カ災対室長……彼女は、顔の右側が焼け落ちた浄瑠璃人形の付喪神。名前は「ハツ」。かつて、曽根崎心中の劇に使われていたそうだ。

「総員、第二種戦闘配置。周辺10キロ圏内の地域に避難命令。カ災対権限による非常事態宣言を発令。不滅親衛隊は迎撃を開始せよ。」

　不滅親衛隊陸軍航空隊。ジェット爆撃機の編隊が現場へと向かう。

「またっすか。」

『どうやら。ま、今回のやつはステルス能力がない分、やりやすい。』

『こちらブットビエンバン。隊長、敵を正面11時の方向に確認しました。』

『仕事が早いな。お前たち、南から向かってきている海軍航空隊が囮になってる間、バンカーバスターを奴の鱗にブチ込んでやろうぜ！』

『『『「了解！！」』』』

　現場では、空母から発進した攻撃機による機銃掃射が行われていた。やはり、カイジュウ相手では意味がない。

　しかし、囮としては十分で、敵は南へ向かい、東の港町から離れている。

『クソっ！　こいつ、どんだけ撃ちゃいいんだよ！』

『知るか！　カイジュウってのはいっつもこうじゃねぇか！』

『こちらムーン・スクリーム、光線をくらった、メーデー、メーデェ……ｻﾞｻﾞｯ』

『まずい！　また1機やられた！』

『北東より、陸軍航空隊の爆撃隊を確認！　やったぞ！』

『バンカーバスターをブチ込んでやれ！！　行けぇい！！』

　超音速の爆撃隊。搭載された誘導ミサイルが2本ずつ放たれ、カイジュウへと向かって……爆轟が辺りに立ち込める。

『こちら、陸軍航空隊。こちら、陸軍航空隊。司令部に通達。全弾の命中を確認。繰り返す。全弾の命中を確認。』

「やったぞ！　カ災対抜きでカイジュウを討伐した！　しかも、出現から最短の17分でな！」

　不滅親衛隊の士官が半ば嘲笑うように笑顔を見せ、カ災対の本部で叫ぶ。

「……。」

　アンダインはその士官を、冷たい目で見つめ、黙らせる。

「すまんなハツ。最近、部下たちも統制でストレスが溜まってるようだ。」

と付け加えて。

「……元帥のライムさ��も来ないくらい、な。」

　しかし、彼女も内心、

（ハツのやつ、数日前まで部下だったくせに、我々よりも強い権限を持ちやがって……）

などと、ガムを噛みながら考えていた。

「……！？　生体反応を確認。」

　不滅親衛隊との対立を、心配そうに見つめていた部下が叫ぶ。

「パターンシアン、先程のカイジュウです！」

「！！？」

「あれだけ誘導弾が直撃したのに！？」

　カ災対を嘲笑っていた士官が一気に青ざめる。

〈English〉

*This may not be a correct translation due to the use of automatic translation software.

【Episode 5 "BK-K, First Deployment".】

"TANABATA detects a space-time distortion!　As expected, it is coming from western Anego Port and southern CORE!"

　The Kaiju Disaster Response Office, also known as BK-K, is the headquarters of the Kaiju Disaster Response Office. This is the headquarters of the Undying Royal Guard (UR for short), a facility attached to its high command center. There, a siren echoes.

"What's the bio-pattern?"

"Pattern cyan. Kaiju."

　The head of the BK-K office asks her subordinate. She looked at him, "I knew it.

　The head of the BK-K office ...... She is a joruri doll with the right side of her face burned off. Her name is Hatsu. She was once used in the play "Sonezakishinju" (Sonezaki Shinju).

"All personnel, move to Type 2 Combat Deployment. Order evacuation of all areas within a 10-kilometer radius of the site and declare a state of emergency by BK-K special authority.

　UR's Army Air Forces. A formation of jet bombers heads toward the site.

"Again?"

"Apparently. Well, this time the enemy doesn't have stealth capabilities, so it's easier to do."

"This is Buttobi Enban. Captain, I have the enemy in sight, 11 o'clock.

"You're working fast. You guys, let's put bunker busters into the enemy's scales while the naval air force takes the bait in the south!"

"Yes, sir!"

　On the scene, the attack aircraft launched from the carrier were firing machine-gun fire. After all, it would be meaningless against the Kaiju.

　But it was enough as a decoy, and the enemy was heading south, away from the port city to the east.

"Damn!　How many shots do we have to fire at the enemy!"

"I don't know!　Kaiju are always like this!"

"This is Moon Scream, we've been hit by a ray of light, mayday, mayday ......"

"Oh, no!　We've lost another one!"

"Army Air Corps bombers from the northeast!　We're safe!"

"Get those bunker busters in there!　Go, go, go!"

　Supersonic bombers. Two guided missiles are released at a time, and the area is filled with ...... detonation roaring towards the Kaiju.

"This is Army Air Forces. This is Army Air Forces. Command post notified. All missiles confirmed hit. Repeat. All rounds confirmed hit."

"We did it!　We took down the Kaiju without BK-K!　And in the shortest 17 minutes since it appeared!"

　The UR officer smiles half-mockingly and shouts at BK-K's headquarters.

"......."

　Undyne looks at the officer with a cold stare, silencing him.

"Sorry, Hatsu. My men seem to be under a lot of stress lately due to the strict controls on their lives."

Adding.

"So much so that even ...... Marshal Lime can't come to work, you know."

　But she was also thinking this inwardly, chewing gum.

"Hatsu, you were my subordinate until a few days ago, and now you're ...... acting all high and mighty!"

"......!　Confirm bio-reaction."

　Hatsu's subordinate, who had been anxiously watching the confrontation between BK-K and UR, exclaimed.

"Pattern Cyan, it's the kaiju from earlier!"

"!!!!"

"After all those direct hits from the guided missile!"

　The officer who had been mocking BK-K turns pale at once.

[littlemessyjessi]

-

Chapter Eight: "Kaleidoscope of Chaos": A Yandere Kim Taehyung Story

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Plus size female, yandere.

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Warning: does contain yandere themes and therefore some sensitive content. Also of you are under 18 please leave as this will contain some mature themes. Obviously, I dont BTS nor do I think Taehyung would exhibit this type of behavior. It's purely a work of fiction. I hope you enjoy and come along for the journey.

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Also, this will contain a mixture of written text as well as edits, fake social media and fake texts. I personally enjoy them and I think they add another layer to my content so I like to include them.

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This story and all kpop content can be found by accessing the Navi link in my bio. It will be on masterlist 2.0. From there you just access the BTS Masterpost and it's fairly self explanatory from there.

💙

-

Jess watched as Poseidon roamed around in her backyard.

The white duck making noises and attempting to snatch bugs out of the dirt.

Of course, he had been fine without her for a day or so.

She'd asked her neighbor to watch after him with a simple text and the poor college boy was so in lust with her that all she had to do was batt her eyelashes at him and he came running.

She wasn't in the slightest bit interested in him.

However, she wasn't stupid.

She knew he was easily manipulated and sometimes it amused her to get him to do her bidding.

A run to the grocery store here.

Taking care of her duck there.

Small, meaningless things really.

She supposed it was wrong of her.

Though, she had never been able to find it in herself to care.

Her attention was far too focused else where to ever worry about little Jungho and his fleeting lust fueld feelings.

Especially not when she'd already over heard him claiming to his little friends that she had already put out for him numerous times.

Viscious lies, of course.

She didn't put out that easily or at all really unless it happened to be a one, Kim Taehyung.

Then she was 'insatiable' as he had so eloquently put.

The memory made a smile tug at her lips even if it was soured moments later by the events that followed.

She was obsessed with Taehyung and she knew it.

She would do anything to have him and to keep him.

Except for being something she wasn't.

And there was a twisted little inkling curling in her gut that his sometimes traditional values would eventually flare up and want her to be June Cleaver.

And she was most certainly not… nor would she even entertain such an idea.

She wanted Taehyung.

She did.

But if being with him meant being someone she wasn't… well then she'd just have to take another route.

She wasn't above manipulating him.

She could do it easily.

Hack into his bank account, steal his identity.

It would be so easily.

Even with him knowing that she could do it, it wouldn't take her long.

She doubted she would even have to do that.

She could simply threaten to do the same to one of his precious members.

That seemed to be a touchy subject though she supposed it would be.

He had spent years with these men.

To kidnap him, tie him up, lock him away… all of that was just way too dramatic.

Way too much work and honestly… it seemed rather boring to her.

And pointless to be honest.

She could find him easily of her own doing but he seemed set on the idea that she would never have to do that again.

There was a honesty to his words that unsettled her a bit.

Mostly because she thought that she was the deranged one in this situation.

She had expected at least a little resistance and the fact that he went so easily was a bit bothersome to her.

Perhaps, it was the fact that she felt like she didn't have quite the power that she thought she did.

She had been so sure.

Played it out in her head so many times and no scenario had ever come to fruition like it did.

It had been easy, blissfully so, even.

And that, in and of itself, was a problem.

It was too easy and so her guard was still up a little.

She knew she could weasel out of it easy enough if he tried to turn her in.

She could hack his entire life and have him by the metaphorical balls faster than he could blink.

And she had contacts.

Plenty of them, willing to do any number of unspeakable acts.

She spoke numerous languages, could hack anything and could charm the pants off anyone.

She didn't necessarily make friends easily but she did have acquaintances and she had dirt on them.

And the backup blackmail that would go viral even if she were dead.

The kind of dirt that would make someone willing to commit murder just to keep you quiet.

It was both of her insurance and her ammunition.

So keeping Taehyung in line should've have been a problem.

It shouldn't have caused her the sense of dread pooling in her stomach.

But it did.

She glanced at her phone sitting on the table, lighting up for the fifth time in an hour with another text.

Taehyung: Baby, please come back. I really miss you. I know you just left a few hours ago but I feel like you left on bad terms. I don't want bad blood between us. At least, come back tonight. I just want to hold you. Call me when you can. Please.

She lifted an eyebrow at the screen.

Lovesick for sure.

Almost, desperate which would be dangerous if it were not for the fact that she had no sense of self preservation.

She decided to test the waters just a bit and see his reaction.

Her fingers flew across the screen as she texted.

Jess: Are you in the studio today? Maybe I could come see you for a bit. I have an early schedule tomorrow so I can't come over but maybe I swing by with some dinner and a good night kiss?

She knew she was playing dirty but she was curious.

Tae: I am in the studio but I don't know if it's a good idea that you come by. Of course, I want to see you and I definitely want a good night kiss but I don't know if the others should meet you.

She narrowed her eyes at the screen.

Jess: I've already met Hobi. I don't see what the big deal is. But it's fine. I'll see you in a few days then.

Tae: No, come see me, baby. I want to see you and I can't wait a few days. Please, sweetheart. If you won't stay the night again, just come see me. I'll take us out for dinner after. Just the two of us.

Jess: I can bring food. Actually, I can pick up food for everyone. It'll be a good opportunity to meet the others. I have to at some point, right? I mean, we're it, right? They're a big part of your life and you and I are going to be together for a long time. Might as well. I can't think of a reason not to, can you?

She had him and she knew it.

She had backed him into a corner and she knew that if he denied it now, then he would look like a total asshole.

Tae: Ok, baby. Come whenever you like. Not everyone is here today but you can meet Namjoon, Jimin, Yoongi and Jungkook. They're here writing today. Tell me when you get here and I'll come walk you in.

She smirked at her small victory.

Jess: Ok, love. Do you have a preference? I'll pick up something you like if you tell me what you want.

Tae: I trust you. Just nothing too spicy for me. Jimin and Joon don't eat seafood but Jungkook and Yoongi will eat pretty much anything. Whatever you want, baby.

Jess: Pizza it is. Sound good?

Tae: Sounds great, baby. See you soon?

Jess: I'll be there around seven or so. That ok?

Tae: I'll be not so patiently waiting. And I'm gonna need some kisses. Like on sight.

She laughed at her phone.

Jess: Pizza with a side of kisses. Got it.

Tae: Just for my order though, right? No side of kisses for anyone else.

Jess: Of course, my love. Only a side of kisses for you. I saved those kisses for a very long time just for you. You don't think I'd give them away would you?

Tae: Good. I need them for the rest of my life. Breakfast, lunch and dinner. Snacks and elevensies.

Jess: Taehyung, you just referenced The Lord of the Rings. I will marry you right now.

Tae: SOLD! SOLD RIGHT NOW! TELL ME THE RING SIZE!

Jess: Lol, see you soon, babe.

Jess tossed her phone down on the bed.

She had a feeling that this was about to be a rather interesting evening… but she couldn't wait to see it play out.

—-

Hey loves! Thanks for checking out my work! For all kpop content check Masterlist 2.0 in my navi! Link in bio! Love, K 💋

@thickemadame ​ @blackirisposts @therealmrshale   @thegreatirene @angelus320   @disneymarina @sullybot   @alisoncdariel @amethyst09   @kalliravenne   @gruffle1 @leah-halliwell92    @queenlexusloverofbts @owenniasstars   @adventuresofnight   @halobaby @tacobacoyeet @glassesandthunderthighs   @poopypantsmcgee666-blog @teenagesublimefan @lyn-g @milkshakelol @sunnysidesblog @speedyhandsbonkpalace @mwitsmejk @pinkcherrybombs @abc-abc1234-a

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[idontwanttospoiltheparty]

hi!! i was thinking that the two intros in ‘Julia’ (Half of what I say is meaningless [...]/When I cannot sing my heart [...]) are imo two key lines to understand John’s approach to love/communication (could be applicable to his relationship with Paul) what do you think about it?

Hi anon!!

It's interesting you bring this up. I've often gotten the impression, for example from reading the letters John wrote, which often contained very little content and seemed to be filled with some stream-of-consciousness filler (e.g. this letter to George, this love letter to Cyn, this other letter to Cyn with a lot of content but it's filled with "I love you" and "I miss you" interludes), that John was a very phatic communicator.

That is to say, he liked communicating for the sake of communication, to feel like he was being perceived, especially by loved ones.

(sidenote: if you google phatic communication you'll see that it often takes the form of small talk, which John I believe specifically says he hates in the Davies bio – I don't think this disproves my point at all; I simply think he didn't enjoy phatically communicating with just anyone and also did it in ways other than small talk)

I actually find this a really relatable trait of his, filling up the space between you and someone else with words to ensure the connection to them remains uninterrupted (also belonging to this category: his teasing of Paul, "spiderhand", among others; to me, these actions all appear to be for the sake of upholding some type of communication)

That does seem to be what he's saying in Julia, doesn't it: Half of what I say is meaningless / But I say it just to reach you, Julia

When I first read this message, my mind immediately went to the scene in Get Back Ep2, when John is quoting song lyrics and Paul is seemingly not responding. I’ve never been entirely convinced that John was specifically communicating the meaning of the lyrics he chose, partially because of the monotonous tone he used. Whether he meant it or not though, from my perspective, it isn’t unreasonable for Paul to assume John didn't mean anything specific with the lyrics, but was instead just trying to make sure he and Paul are still communicating in some way, because, from what I’ve observed, he was like that? So, John wasn't necessarily acting much out of the ordinary in that scene.

The "When I cannot sing my heart / I can only speak my mind" line feels like a completely different beast to me, that I don't as intuitively "get" as the first one. I do generally think John was probably not great at outright stating his feelings and that the lyrics might be an admission to this flaw. They might also be referring to the juxtaposition between being truly vulnerable and being flippantly honest in a way that shuts down a conversation, which John was prone to do.

Anyone else have any thoughts on this?

[thewoodshungers-if]

Hi dear author!! Would it be okay to ask you for typing in how can we address you (w pronounce) in the summary/bio of the blog? So we won't ever forget it (I'm a forgetful dumbass)

On the other note, if only it's allowed to ask abt ROs reactions ofc, can we have a reaction of lovely ROs to MC who placed gently a flower crown onto their head while saying "for the ruler of my heart"?:)

Oh ofc!! I shouldve done that from that start, thank you for telling me!

I accept RO reacts! Feel free to send them to me

Viel

He'll like it too much the moment your hands touched his head, so when you placed a flower crown and said that? He'll get flustered and will cover it up by complaining a lot although his face will turn red.

"Stop teasing me! .. This feels like it's the other way around, is this a crown or a collar?"

Nora

She reached for your hands as you pulled away, grasping them and pulling them to her lips. Her kisses littered your knuckles and fingers as she watched your reaction, but she couldn't resist and would ruin the moment

"And you're the ruler of my ass- Ouch! You can't take the crown away, it's mine!"

Ylfa

Eyes going wide and heart jumping out of her chest, she told you to wait and stay there before rushing off. When she returns out of breath, she took your hand and slipped a flower ring onto your fingers before lacing her fingers with yours, laughing.

"I promise I'll do right by you! I'll be a good ruler, you won't regret it!"

Aen'frie

Melts. They'll stare at you, starry-eyed before taking your hand and asking you to teach them how to make one for you. They learn quickly, and as they placed the flower crown on your head, they'll place a kiss on your forehead.

"All of me is yours. For the ruler of my heart"

The Cook

Teases you at least once for it. At least. Which means you won't hear the end of it. If you kept pouting at them, they'll pull you closer to press a kiss on your cheeks before pinching them just to be a menace.

"Rulers are corrupt, I'm abjudicating- No, no, don't give me that face. I'll give you all of my heart, so will you give me all of yours?"

Caine

Oh no rip Caine. Swoons. He'll stare at you dumbstruck, cheeks slowly turning red. He a prince, he's familiar with thrones and power, but after seeing the way you look at him, any other throne but the one you just gave him was meaningless.

".. Thank you, I'm- I'm honored.. I'm sorry I need a moment"

[purple-ktj]

What happened to your curious cat???

Update 31 Dec 2021

Happy New Year!

I will no longer be returning to the old cc and continue to disable unregistered users from sending messages. This is the new link I’ll be active on: https://curiouscat.live/9370db. 

There were far too many trolls and antis in the previous cc, and I realised that word filters and such were not working well. This is hopefully a stronger deterrent so I’m very sorry to the kind anons I’ve chatted with so far who’ve been affected as well. 

I realized that there are no options for you to post anonymously as a registered user on CC. Here are some solutions:

Please unlink your cc account from your main and link it to a dummy twitter/facebook account. 

OR

Go to your settings and uncheck like below: 

Please make sure you’re using an unidentifiable (from your main twitter account) username.

Once again, I’m really sorry for the extra trouble. If you have any further issues, you can send in messages and request for me to not post them. I’ll try to address them if I can either here or in the new CC. 

Update: 27/12/2021

Due to some technical issues with Tellonym, some users requested I go back to CC. So... this is a brand new untainted CuriousCat: https://curiouscat.live/9370db. I disabled unregistered users from sending messages so you’ll still need a CC account. Sorry for the second move within a week! 

Fair warning, I learned that I can’t differentiate between a baby army or a troll so if I deem the message meaningless, it’s an instant delete/block. (Sorry to the baby armys, please do your own basic research or watch original BTS content to try to satisfy your curiosity. I can’t answer the same question fifty times.) 

Besides that, if you created an account just to ask me “Why is Tae’s friend Wooshik only following JK out of all the members and not Jin?” it’s an instant block + delete. 

(Tellonym will be disabled in a day or so)

Second round of meow chaos, here we go!

Update: Merry Xmas!

Thank you for giving me your suggestions, I have decided to go along with Tellonym for now. 

Link: https://tellonym.me/9370db

After a lot of consideration, I’ve decided to turn off anonymous asks. I know it’s extra trouble and probably not worth the trouble but for my sanity and safety, I’ve decided to turn it off. If there’s anything curious cat taught me, word filters aren’t enough, I need to be able to block certain users/trolls. 

Pros/cons

- Your account username will not be visible after I reply to your ask so you're as good as anonymous to other users. Only I will be able to see your username

- Create a dummy account or a few dummy accounts if you’d like (that way I wouldn’t know if you’re the same anon

- I can and I will block at my discretion (again, for my own sanity) 

- Cosier and safer community (I hope)

- No popping veins over annoying toxic Taekookers or other shippers (I hope)

- I can edit the bio! :D so I’ve linked this blog over there so if even my tellonym link gets circulated in weird places, they have no excuse, therefore I am free to delete any asks from people who clearly have not read this blog  

Cons

- I don’t know if there are word limits and if you can type a whole essay expressing your love or confusion about Taejin

- I turned on language filter to the highest level but the app doesn’t specify so I don’t know what sort of profanities will be filtered (don’t even try)

- Sorry you’ll have to fumble with logging in especially if Taejin happens and you’re dying to scream about it but still gotta log in 

Well... lets see how this goes. Happy Holidays! <3

:)

Hellooo

I've been informed about my broken curious cat and seems like the entire site is down. Curious cat itself isn't working, not just mine. I don't know if it'll get fixed. If it's getting fixed, when it'll be up or if it's not, then the platform is forever gone.

I don't have any alternatives in mind so if you would still love to communicate with me about Taejin casually, feel free to hit the comments or DM me with suggestions. I'll see what I can do. (Preferably equally low profile and non-attention attracting options. Anonymity might be compromised but we can work around that, hopefully.)

[aropinions]

So What Is Exclusionism, Anyway?

As I've looked through inclusionist circles, I've come to a startling realization that most of them have an extremely skewed understanding of what exclusionism is (along with its various offshoots, subtypes, and related beliefs). They equate it to hatred of whatever group is being excluded, and they don't think people part of the excluded group could ever support exclusionism.

So, I've decided to write a long post to clear up some of those misconceptions. This post is mainly targeted to inclusionists and people wondering where they stand on the inclus/exclus sides of various types of discourse, but if you're exclusionist already, please feel free to reblog or boost it. <3 Thanks in advance for reading!

I'll start by introducing myself. Hi, I'm Ivy, or at least that's what I go by on here. I am a heterosexual, aromantic female. I am neurodivergent (ADHD, so forgive me if I ramble or write in a scatterbrained way) and have several other mental illnesses that I don't wish to talk about online. I do not have gender dysphoria, but I do not "feel feminine," and my personality has been described as rather masculine. In fact, many people in the inclusionist trans community have tried to convince me that I'm nonbinary because I don't feel a strong connection to a female gender, and I'll talk about that more later in this post.

I'm going to put all my relevant discourse opinions on the table right now. (In the next paragraph, I'm going to explain what all these labels actually mean and why they don't automatically make someone a horrible person.) Contrary to popular belief, I am not a trans-exclusionary radical feminist (TERF), an aphobe, a transphobe, or a bigot. I am ace-exclusionist, aro-exclusionist, trans-exclusionist, transmedicalist, pro-LGB, and gender-critical.

Now here's the fun part. Bear with me -- we're about to debunk the myths about these opinions, explain each term's real definition, and talk about some of the reasoning behind the beliefs.

Exclusionism, as a blanket term, is the belief that gatekeeping is necessary to make any group or community meaningful and safe. Various types of exclusionists fight against the lumping together of various marginalized identities or groups, because they believe that letting different types of people into spaces meant for more specific groups will detract from the safety and functionality of those spaces. They do not hate the groups they are excluding, and they typically want to exclude both ways. For example, ace exclusionists don't want allosexual LGBT let into ace spaces any more than they want asexuals let into LGBT spaces. Many exclusionists in LGBT discourse support the exclusion of groups that they themselves are part of, because in addition to the idea that it's harmful to the main LGBT community to lump them into it, they also think their group deserves its own recognition as a separate thing from the LGBT community. Exclusionism is not hatred.

Time to get into more specific terms. Let's start pretty simple, with truscum and transmeds. Someone who is truscum believes that people must have dysphoria to be trans. Someone who is transmedicalist believes that gender dysphoria is a mental disorder, and that transness is a medical condition synonymous with gender dysphoria. All transmeds are truscum, but not all truscum are transmeds. Most truscums and transmeds are against MOGAI, neopronouns, gender microlabels (e.g. genderflux or demiboy), and xenogenders. Most truscums believe in nonbinary people. There are some transmeds who don't believe nonbinary dysphoria is real, but they're not the majority.

The direct opposite of truscum and transmed is "tucute," which denotes a belief that dysphoria is not required to be transgender and gender identity is completely unrelated to biological sex or medical disorders/conditions. Tucutes also generally support MOGAI, xenogenders, neurogenders, microlabels, and neopronouns.

Next, we have bio-essentialism. Bio-essentialism is the belief that oppression is based on biological sex, not gender identity, and that identifying as a different gender than your birth sex doesn't automatically mean you are oppressed. This doesn't necessarily mean bio-essentialists believe that gender doesn't exist or that you can't identify as whatever you want, just that your social oppression is based off your biological sex. Not all bio-essentialists are truscum or transmeds, but most are. Bio-essentialists prominently use the terms "male" and "female" to describe biological sex rather than gender identity, and non-radical ones will use "man" and "woman" as blanket terms that include transmen and transwomen while maintaining "male" and "female" as words for biological sex only.

Then, we have the big bad term, TERF. I've seen a lot of people misuse the TERF label, so I'm going to try to clarify its actual meaning. The acronym stands for "trans-exclusionary radical feminist." It's important to break that down into two main parts -- TE and RF -- because trans-exclusionists are often called TERFs when most of them don't fit the "RF" part of the acronym at all.

Trans-exclusionism (TE) means that you believe transgender issues/discourse/activism should be separated from LGB issues/discourse/activism because they are fundamentally different. L, G and B all have one thing in common: being attracted to people of the same sex as you. T is about someone's gender, not their sexual orientation, so trans-exclusionists believe that the LGB and the T should not be lumped into the same community. It doesn't mean they think trans people deserve less respect or are not real. Most trans-exclusionists are also truscum or transmedicalist, but not all are. Many trans-exclusionists who are also feminists are gender-critical, but not all are. Pro-LGB is a synonym of trans-exclusionist, but in my experience, people who describe themselves as "pro-LGB" are more likely to also be gender-critical than those who identify themselves as "trans-exclusionist."

Radical feminism (RF) is a subset of feminism that -- in addition to general feminist beliefs -- is anti-porn, anti-kink, against the makeup industry, and very often openly misandrist. Radical feminists are not always trans-exclusionist, and trans-exclusionists are not always radical feminists (in fact, most aren't). Most radfems are anti-capitalist, and all are against pink capitalism and rainbow capitalism (the commercialization of feminist ideas, gay rights, etc.) Most radfems are truscum or transmedicalist, but not all are.

All TERFs are also gender-critical. "Gender-critical" people are bio-essentialist, but they go a step further to say that gender identity is a meaningless term, and that biological sex is the sole basis of oppression. However, one can be gender-critical and still support trans people if one is a transmedicalist. GC transmeds believe that trans people are still oppressed in society according to their biological sex, not their gender identity, but that social/physical transitioning is acceptable as a treatment for the mental disorder known as gender dysphoria.

Neither trans-exclusionism nor radical feminism is inherently transphobic or hateful toward transgender people. To differentiate a regular trans-exclusionist from a TERF, ask yourself if the person fits the radfem beliefs outlined above. If not, they aren't a TERF.

Now that all of that is covered, we can talk about the last couple types of exclusionism I want to touch on -- asexual exclusionism and aromantic exclusionism. These almost always come together as a package called aro/ace-exclusionism or aspec-exclusionism, but it is technically possible to be ace-exclusionist and not aro-exclusionist (or vice versa), though I've never personally met someone with such beliefs. Aspec-exclusionists believe that aspec people should not be included in the LGBT community because the lack of sexual or romantic attraction is a completely separate struggle and involves separate experiences than having attractions that exist, but are not heterosexual. Some more extreme aro/ace exclusionists strongly gatekeep aromanticism and asexuality. These ones don't believe in microlabels on the "aro spectrum" or "ace spectrum" such as demisexual or grayromantic. They maintain the belief that if someone has sexual attraction (regardless of whether they actually pursue people sexually) then they are not asexual, and if someone feels romantic attraction at all (even if they don't pursue romantic relationships) they are not aromantic.

Aro/ace-exclusionists, regardless of their beliefs on aromantic and asexual spectrums or microlabels, are not inherently aphobic. They only want aromanticism and asexuality to be separated from the rest of the LGB or LGBT community, and treated as their own distinct identities.

I hope this post was informative, and if anyone has feedback on anything I should edit, they should let me know in replies. Regardless of your beliefs, if you actually read this whole post or even just scrolled to the bottom, I'd like to offer a sincere thanks for bearing with me thus far. If you are an inclusionist or otherwise disagree with the things in the post, but you read it anyway, I have a lot of respect for your willingness to hear opinions other than yours rather than blindly blocking out everything you disagree with.

No matter who you are, I hope you have a great day. <3

[redhawtriot]

Tinder Games (BNHA x Reader online dating)

Let’s get one thing straight: You loved to ‘play’ Tinder.

At first you felt a considerable amount of guilt from the mindless swipes that you would dish out and believed that it was completely shallow to begin a connection to someone based solely on looks.

However.

The more that your thumb slid across the front of your phone, the less impersonal the action felt and soon the guilt faded into the back of your mind like a lost sock.

Besides, you never really met anyone off of one of the site. It became more of a game really. You played to see who you matched with and would rally up some meaningless but nevertheless interesting conversation with strangers and maintain them just as that—strangers.

Until a certain someone ruined that trend.

Y/N

Age: Y/A

Work: Y/W School: Y/S

Just looking for someone to paint me like one of their French girls. Send me your best pick up line!

Izuku: I don’t wanna sound rude or anything but you are so beautiful and I would love to have the chance to get to know you ❤️ if that’s okay.

Y/N: Bio.

Izuku: ...Huh?

Y/N: “If you wanna be my lover, you have gotta give... me your best pick up line.”-- Spice Girls (don’t look this lyric up just trust me)

Izuku: Okay... Um.

Izuku: Is your name Y/N? because you’re beautiful and I would like to get to know you❤️ if that’s okay.

Izuku: plz.

Y/N: you make a compelling argument.

Y/N: Okay deal.

Todoroki: I will be there at 8:18 to pick you up. 

Todoroki: I need your address.

Y/N: Woahhhh there Buck-a-roo🤠. Lets slow down a little there buddy.✋

Todoroki: I am very confused. I am sorry if I offended you in some way but I thought that you had asked for me to give my best pick up time.

Y/N: Line***

Todoroki: Oh so there is a line? What time will you be finished with my competitors?

Y/N: No a Pick up Line*** it’s where you say something witty to grab the attention of someone you want to... court? is that a term that can be used here...?

Todoroki: Oh my mistake... I am assuming I have grabbed your attention enough with my foolishness.

Y/N: You have assumed correct. 

Todoroki: so the next step is courting. 

Todoroki: I will be there at 8:18 to pick you up.

Todoroki: I need your address.

Y/N: I-- okay.

Y/N: Hey you super liked me but never messaged me...?

Bakugou: And?

Y/N: And I was really looking forward to your pick up line.

Bakugou: You’re dumber than you look if you think I’m doing that weird shit.

Y/N: okay bye.😒

Bakugou: whatever idiot.

Bakugou: Hello?

Bakugou: Fine. 

Bakugou: You look like trash. Let me take you out.

Y/N: Now was that so hard?🥰

Bakugou: ARE YOU GONNA COME OUT WITH ME OR NOT??

Y/N: Let me think about it...

Y/N: I was jk! Jeeze!

Y/N: Stop whatever you're typing right now!

Y/N: I can literally feel the rage through my cellular data.

Y/N: I’ll go out with you! Ok? (against my better judgement)

Bakugou: Good.

Kaminari: Baby girl, let me take your world by storm. I’ll be there in a flash like lightning, and make you wet like rain, then we can bang like thunder. 

Y/N: Oh god. You have a weather quirk don’t you?😷🤢🤮

Kaminari: Your quirk must be making me fall in like with you.🙃

Y/N: fall in like with me...?

Kaminari: Of course I will. Your wish is my command, princess.

Y/N: I hate that this worked out for you so much. 😂

Kaminari: 😈

Iida: Good Evening. My name is Tenya Iida. I would like to propose a formal invitation to you to meet at a nearby convenient location so that we can become better acquainted.

Y/N: nope. try again. with more soul.

Iida: Excuse me? I don’t think I understand your dilemma. 

Y/N: I need a pick up line. Only then will I decided if you are truly worthy of my affections. Aaaaand ACTION.

Iida: I don’t see how that will aid this situation.

Y/N: *yawn*🤭  

Iida: You cannot yawn through text!!!

Iida: Oh my goodness, I caught your yawn! It’s contagious! You can yawn through text!!

Y/N: Haha I’m still waiting on my pickup line lover boy.

Iida: Hopefully my admiration for you is just as contagious as that yawn was.

Iida: Now, when are you available to get together?

Y/N: Right freaking now.

Y/N: So you never gave me your best pick up line, but is it okay if I give you mine?😊

Kirishima: yeah, man go ahead!

Kirishima: Im sorry for not messaging you. You’re kinda out of my league honestly... I just wasn’t sure if you would really answer.

Y/N: pardon my French but exscusez moi?!? outta your league? Um no. It’s the other way around. 💀

Kirishima: I don’t agree but thank you.

Kirishima: actually no, let me come up with the pick up line. That wasn’t very manly of me, was it?

Y/N: “yeah man go ahead” You can do it!!!

Kirishima: Roses are red, My hair is too, youre the embodiment of my dreams come true,

Kirishima: Im already falling, so hold my hand, I’d always protect you if I was your man.

Kirishima: hello?

Kirishima: Uh... Y/N ? That was kind of corny. Sorry if that went too far...

Y/N: no ... it’s just. I have something in my eye🥺😭

[kinetic-elaboration]

June 17: 1x23 The Omega Glory

Watched the very uneven episode “The Omega Glory” today. Upon some reflection.. I think I have seen it? But I think my last rewatch ended abruptly after “By Any Other Name” so it might have been some time ago.

Anyway, it was... something. Decent, I might even say good, until the last 10-15 minutes and then it just went off a cliff? That’s how I’d summarize it.

Sulu, my beloved. I’ve missed you.

Kirk knows where all the ships are. I mean, obviously, but I love to hear it.

Phasers on heavy stun huh?

It’s so weird to be on a different ship. That looks like the same ship. It’s so empty and haunted looking.

With creepy crystal remains of bodies everywhere.

“These white crystals... are the crew.”

Something was thirsty!! Perhaps... a water vampire? Perhaps... a former McCoy girlfriend?

(Honestly having watched the whole ep...they could have expanded this intro longer. It was creepy and mysterious. Then cut the last act.)

Oh no, they’ve been infected and now must quarantine. Sort of. I guess.

...Oh no, is this Vietnam? Again?

“Our old enemy, Vietnam.”

My mother suggested the disease might be communism and I don’t think that metaphor tracks through the whole episode but you know what.. anything’s possible.

I don’t like this whole “you can’t leave the planet or you’ll get sick and die” thing. Too familiar.

"I may never be able to leave this planet but I have a worse problem: a colleague may be breaking a rule."

Says the man who has frequently violated a directive that has never been referred to as Prime before.

Kirk is getting very mumbly. That’s his serious voice.... bu it’s also his Denny Crane voice lol.

Like bio warfare in the 90s? TOS really thought the 90s was going to be the dark ages, didn’t it?

Only 90s kids remember...

Spock bursting in with a wounded man, just bringing the drama, as he does.

He’s not even listening to McCoy. Rude.

Spock absolutely 100% would have killed Captain Tracey on instinct as soon as Kirk is threatened.

Sulu’s in command? I love Captain Sulu but where is Scotty?

Kirk is so good. Clever, strong, smart. Knows all the regulations.

Tracey’s so dumb. “They’ve eradicated disease and live for hundreds of years!” Man, have you considered that they are...aliens? And their life spans are simply.... naturally longer than human life spans? And even if you could isolate the serum, it might not work on humans?

And his master plan is to isolate their immunity and bottle it for profit. It’s our old enemy... capitalism and the exploitation of intellectual property.

A fight scene!

“The pointy-eared one stays.”

Another fight scene!

Spock is watching all of this, and you know what, I feel like he’s not upset about it. It’s just like Pre-Reform Vulcan. Perhaps some... Amok Time flashbacks? “Damn, I wish that was me.”

Peanut gallery Spock.

“I wish you could teach me that.” / “I have tried.” Omg where is my scene of Spock trying to teach Kirk the nerve pinch?

And then that look Kirk gives him.

I don’t get the point of this scene but it amuses me that as soon as McCoy sees the pretty girl, he feels better.

A post-apocalyptic alien world... a very interesting concept. Like you could do a lot with that idea imo.

“That’s our worship word [freedom too.” Umm.... questionable.

Damn bitch, that was cold. Just knocking him out like that.

Damn yankee.

...Yankee and Communist dammit.

McCoy’s not even surprised to see Kirk and Spock out of jail.

Nature created a natural counterbalance to the biological disease. Where is OUR natural counterbalance, I ask?

McCoy sounds extra Southern rn. It’s all the stress.

I really don’t think Shatner gets enough credit for his subtlety. His face when McCoy explains the whole situation...

Oh he's mad now. "You've hurt Spock for nothing! Oh yeah and also killed thousands but MOSTLY THE SPOCK THING!”

Whereas Tracey really doesn’t seem to care about anything but war for its own sake. He knows now that his master plan for immortality was nothing the whole time...but he still needs to call those Yangs.

In other words, another once-reputable figure of authority now gone mad.

Kirk’s voice is so casual when he’s talking to Uhura and Sulu, you feel like he’s gotta have something up his sleeve. He can never hide when he’s really upset about something.

...Apparently what he had up his sleeve was his crew knowing regulations and then another full body tackle. Fight scene 3!

"My need for attention is vital.” Same, Spock.

This is a very attenuated and unbelievable connection Kirk is making but he’s Kirk so I’ll assume it makes sense that he’s putting it all together so fast.

Alternate Universe: Vietnam canon-divergence lol.

For anyone keeping track, this is right about the point where the episode goes off the rails.

YOU���RE A ROMANTIC, JIM. Well he’s right about that at least and he should say it.

Oh no, an American flag.

Cloud William, chief and the son of chiefs. That’s continuity of government for you.

(Also pretty hilarious that this society is supposedly So American with our exact flag and Constitution and everything... but they’re not a democracy.)

I really don’t want to believe that “under God” is still in the pledge 200 years from now.

"You're confusing the stars with heaven." Kirk thinks he's being called an angel.

The absolute mishmash of meaningless, referent-free words here. America. Native Americans. Communists. The flag, the Constitution. God. Angels. Devils. What???

Like how can they both be flag worshippers AND...believers in God? Who is their God? Alien George Washington?

So rude to call Spock Kirk’s “servant.” That’s his space husband!

Is that a literal picture of Spock as a demon in their.. Bible?

I can’t even follow this anymore.

“You command him.” I mean...yes, that’s how the military works.

“He has no heart.” Wow, rude.

“His heart is different!” I stan one (1) Southern Doctor.

I feel like Spock is just... not having this at all. His face loos like he’s thinking what I’m thinking.

Oh no is that the CONSTITUTION??!

“Kill his servant” wow Tracey is obsessed with Spock, isn’t he? I guess everyone in the Fleet knows about them and their special relationship.

Spock is even amused by the knife at his throat. His eyes say "I am distressed--but fascinated!"

A FOURTH fight scene? And here I thought Kirk was going to recite the Constitution.

“I’m open to suggestions.” He’s just as worried about Kirk as McCoy is, bu the doesn’t show it.

...Yep, he’s being telepathic again. Not really in line with his usual telepathy but okay. Alien magic is flexible.

Okay I have a JD and I can confidently say there is nothing about good defeating evil in the Constitution.

And now this alien guy is immediately ready to make himself a “slave.” That seems problematic. What happened to the holy word “Freedom”?

Wow, Kirk's in a bad mood. "You can't pronounce your own holy words worth shit."

“This is only for the eyes of a Chief,” he says and Kirk just pushes him away.

Spock literally turns Tracey around for Kirk’s big final speech like “Listen up, bitch, my boyfriend’s talking.”

Is this the 4th of July episode?? Feels like there should be canons and fireworks going off behind him rn.

Idk, the words of the Constitution can't be so unique and unprecedented if a WHOLE OTHER ALIEN CIVILIZATION just came up with them, too, on their own, like monkeys typing Hamlet. (Given the timelines here... they probably did it first too lol.)

"Liberty and freedom need to be more than just words." Like what does that even mean in this context? Sounds nice but it’s very hard to put into the context of all the rest of this.

“And uh be nice to the Kohms,” after most of them (?) were probably just killed.

I really was into this until the last 10-15 minutes and I think there were under-explored concepts that could have taken the fever dream of whatever that bizarre-o fever dream at the end was. The abandoned ship. The leftovers of bio warfare. The whole weird and under-explained concept of immunity. The tragedy that so much was destroyed,, including but not limited to the whole Exeter crew, for no reason. What happened to Tracey to so destroy him--was it just greed? What about the “Prime” Directive? Is it important or not. They just leave at the end after (as Spock pointed out) doing quite a bit of their own meddling, even though meddling is allegedly the worst. Also, we know almost nothing about the Kohms at all. The “American” society clearly wasn’t democratic. Were the Kohms literally Communist?

I’m willing to accept a certain degree of alternate Earth scenarios--like Miri (though imo that was not a necessary component of that story) or Bread and Circuses, but this was too much. TOO unbelievable. And frankly unnecessary. You could do an allegory for alternate-Vietnam, and it would be just as clear but even more effective. There wouldn’t be any distraction in the form of “what the fuck is that flag doing here?”

There is a potentially incendiary concept here, which is the same one I thought of reading about actual COG plans--certain aspects of the Yanks’ culture survives, but with absolutely no meaning attached. They have a Constitution but they mispronounce all the words. They have this tattered flag but it has no other meaning. They’ve turned the symbols of the government into a religion, but they don’t practice any of the civil aspects of it--they have chiefs, not democratically appointed leaders, for example. Like, COG asks “what IS the country, and how do you make sure the country endures no matter what?” This was an opportunity to show the worst of that: the country continues to exist as symbology only--incredibly strong symbology, but only that--and all of the actual values that were supposed to be stored with that symbology have disappeared. Similarly, their hatred of their enemies endures. It’s lauded in the ep as their attempt to get “their land” back but what if it’s just war for its own sake, as Tracey seems to be engaging in? To tell that story, especially in the 60s, against the backdrop of Vietnam, and with the references to bio warfare and nuclear warfare, could be powerful. And I know TOS can work in metaphor and comparison. It doesn’t need to bring out a literal fucking flag.

Honestly, it was like they had one good, classic, sci fi story but it didn't fill 52 minutes so they tacked on the American Pride 4th of July Propaganda Extravaganza at the end.

It really felt like the lesson was “America good” lol.

I liked the concept of the post apocalyptic society in the aftermath of bio warfare as a cautionary tale for 1960s America, and I'd be up for crazed snake oil salesman Starfleet Captain (or...whatever his rank was) if it were a bit better explained. But the rest of it....

It also... could have been kinda incendiary with the idea that the Constitution and flag are religious symbols... I mean some people do treat them that way and I've always found that, first, blasphemous, and second, bizarre in such a hyper-Christian country. But I feel like instead of digging ito that, they just tempered it with "But also they're Christian, as you can tell by their drawing of devil!Spock, for some reason."

Idk, this story could have been complete with out the whole weird “Vietnam AU” back story or alternately it could have been a biting commentary about what defines America, and about whether or not our symbols might be more enduring--or even more important to people today??--than the laudable but more complex and difficult ideals that underpin the country’s founding. Are the words of the Constitution just gobbledy gook? They are if you don’t live by them, and America has always struggled to do that. It definitely would struggle even more in the aftermath of an apocalypse.

...I’m more annoyed now, thinking about the possible sci fi story that could have been...

Anyway next is an ep I’m fairly sure I haven’t  seen, so that should be fun.

[arigatouiris]

the tinder date // shinshou hitoshi

Author’s Note: I am in LOVE with @myherowritings​ ‘You Suck at Gaming’ so I wanted to do something in appreciation, albeit a bit differently! So, this happened to me irl haha so I wanted to write about it~ I turned the real guy into Shinsou so that no one would know hahahaha I’m such a creep oh my god 

Word count: 3046

Pairing: Modern! Shinsou Hitoshi x Reader

Warnings: fluff, humor, smau 

❝

You never really wanted to use Tinder to meet new people, but ever since a terrible breakup, your friends, your classmates, your goddamn mind told you that you needed a push and maybe, just maybe, Tinder might do good. 

You weren’t a fan of the idea of meeting people using an app, which honestly, came across the same as buying groceries where some things were available and some things weren’t—you believed you couldn’t do that with people, and you believed with all your heart that people weren’t meant to be either swiped right on or swiped left on. Your heart was already weak as it was, and there was no way you were ready to emotionally invest in something real; at least for the time being.

So that lonely Friday night, you downloaded the app, created your profile, chose the perfect bio after 14 attempts at writing something about yourself, each time forgetting a vital piece of information. You didn’t start swiping right away, something about the process scared you—but there you were, mentally preparing yourself, telling yourself that it was okay, you were going to meet people on these dates and maybe, the app might be good for you, after all. 

You have heard success stories of people meeting via Tinder and having a great relationship and all that; some even find their best friends on the app, which is weird despite the social stigma attached to an app like Tinder. Some of your friends even know people who have gotten married and that’s the tea. You were not ready for either of those, maybe you’d get some coffee with a cute chap and maybe, just maybe, hold hands.

Alright, fine, make out or whatever.

But the prospect felt so wrong, you didn’t know what you would do if he turned out to be a creep. So, bucking it all up, swallowing your pride or what was left of it, you started to look at the men Tinder presented to you.

The very first picture was of a boy whose face revolted you—and if you thought that sounded rude, wait until you start complaining about the grapes he had for hair. 

The second boy was decent, but you were not going for decent on this app. You wanted something written on the bio—something that they were willing to communicate with, something you could identify with, something you can vibe with; and if you didn’t find anything like that, despite how cute the guy can be, you are swiping left on that ass.

It was after what felt like a thousand left swipes did you find someone a least bit attractive. But, you blinked—there was an odd feature under his profile; it was marked blue with a star.

Immediately opening WhatsApp, you texted your friend, Ochako, asking her what it was. Ochako being Ochako instantly called you.

     “Someone super liked you in less than an hour!?”

What in the world was a ‘super like’?

     “Ocha-chan, what’s a ‘super like?’” You rubbed your eyeball as you continued, “And what does it have to do with the fact that I’ve been on this app for less than an hour—”

     “Most super likes are usually done by creeps,” Uraraka didn’t hold back, “But sometimes, if someone really finds you attractive or interesting, you get a super like from a very decent guy. I heard one of my classmate’s brother’s friends met his boyfriend via the ‘super like’ feature!”

     “Y-Yeah, I’m not... I’m not looking for—”

     “It just means that whoever this person is, finds you interesting! So go through his profile and let me know what you think!”

You ended the call right then before going back on the app, finding his profile still open. You wouldn’t lie, he was very attractive—not in the way most people would flaunt over, but you couldn’t take your eyes off him. There was something about the way he was lazily smiling at the camera, or how the light fell on his lavender hair, or how he looked so unapologetically as himself. You then went on to read his bio.

If you matched not to start a conversation, then don’t swipe right. Being left alone is easy. 

It wasn’t all of the bio but this part of the bio somehow stuck to you. It was incredibly honest—and wasn’t the usual ‘interested in trekking’ or fancy words like ‘selenophile’ (words that you had to google basically). You noticed that in one of his pictures, he had a tattoo—of a particular animal but it was so minimalistic you could barely recognize it from the odd angle in the picture.

You swiped right and the pop up appeared ‘It’s a Match!’. Your heart skipped a beat for god knows what and you gulped, wondering what would come next. You didn’t even hold back before looking at the new chat screen. You gulped before shutting your phone and lying back on your bed, wondering what the ideal time to send him a message would be. 

Swallowing your leftover pride, you opened the chat once more and went ahead with, “Please don’t mind my stalker tendencies, but what is that tattoo on your hand?” You wanted to clarify some more that you were not a stalker, but held back.

You closed the app and felt your stomach grumble. This was the start of something—you were sure of that much, but you weren’t sure of what. And this person, Hitoshi, whose last name you did not know, seemed very interesting.

*

The next morning, you woke up to a Tinder notification. Your stomach flipped as the purple-haired boy’s face was your first thought and you instantly opened the message where he had explained that it was a tattoo of his cat.

Your heart melted at this gesture but you reminded yourself that you didn’t even know this person and there was no use feeling warm over one sentence. But, what came next sent your heart on overdrive.

Your eyes widened as you read the messages one by one,

You closed the app and almost screamed, but held yourself back; you figured this was a bad idea because the sound really needed to come out of you and you squealed like a dying animal just seconds after. You needed to tell someone this, but before that, you had to reply to that. You opened the app again with trembling fingers before figuring out what could be the most appropriate response to something like that.

Haha; No, that’s too lame. 

You’re so funny!; No fucking way! 

Ughh, what do I say? What do I say?! You had reached a slump. You had no words. So, you did what you do best—you went with your gut.

You slapped yourself in the forehead. There was no way you were going to live past this one—

You chuckled. He’s funny. You quickly were about to type a response before he added, “Just wanted to have a good conversation with someone new. Not intending on using this app to fornicate like lonely bunnies.”

You stared at the message before feeling a soft smile crawl on to your features. You felt the same, but this wasn’t supposed to happen, right? You weren’t supposed to agree with whatever a random Tinder match was saying, right? It wasn’t supposed to be this easy.

You replied, Same. Intending on great conversations because somehow, that’s taken the backseat these days.

No one really talks anymore, you thought before waiting for his reply. You didn’t know where this conversation would go, really, but you were intending on finding out. You never really chatted with anyone on Tinder before but you were curious as to why he super-liked you, and what this person had in store for you. It was strange, but you enjoyed this feeling. It wasn’t a crush, it had no expectations attached to it—yet, there was a fresh excitement bubbling in your stomach at the mere thought of some stranger talking to you.

You and Hitoshi kept chatting during random points of the day. You’d be cooking for yourself (since it was a weekend), or you’d be taking a dump or you’d try to take a nap—and a simple ping would send your heart to the skies. You didn’t know him for that long, it had been less than a whole day since you two matched, but somehow, talking to him about random things really helped keep your spirits high. You felt genuinely happy—and the excitement kept you going.

You stared at the conversation and wondered why it wasn’t as easy with people you really did know in life. You wondered why people didn’t have time for conversation unless it’s a stranger—isn’t that the entire point of it all? To talk, to spread joy, to ponder on life’s meaninglessness together?

You blinked. Boarding a flight? To where? You wanted to ask, but you really didn’t want to come across as some prying clingy individual. You were curious though.

Oh! Where to?

You hoped that the message sounded less inquisitive and more cheerful for god knows what reason.

Going to Reykjavik for a week. Always wanted to see the lights.

He’s going to... ICELAND?! You felt strangely excited and disappointed, but the fact that he had no obligation to meet you stung.

However—

Your heart shot to the skies. You wanted to respond immediately, but you held back. Clearing your throat, you replied earnestly.

Sure. Looking forward to it! 

And that was that.

*

You never knew how well you could jump to overthinking, especially when it came to strangers. You knew Hitoshi (whatever his last name was) was in Iceland right now, and that only meant that considering the time differences, there would be little to no text messages.

What you didn’t understand was why you got no notifications in three days. A suspicious thing, because Tinder usually throws a thousand notifications at you especially when you don’t want to check them. So, being the inquisitive little cat that you are, you opened the app. Only to find that your account on Tinder is banned.

     “What...” You blinked a couple of times before closing the app and opening it again, “What the fuck!?”

You didn’t know what to do at this point. How could it have been banned? There were no ill comments, no ugly or obscene photographs of you from your end, then why did Tinder ban your account?

You went through the community guidelines and found nothing. Your heart was breaking—Hitoshi must have thought you unmatched him (Ochaco once told you that if you unmatch someone’s profile, they won’t see your chats anymore). You couldn’t even log in, you couldn’t even let him know that it was Tinder cockblocking you and not you being an idiot. Oh, god, why!? You screamed into your pillow, wondering how this could have happened before calling Ochako to help calm you down.

     “How the hell can they ban you?” She asked, causing you to roll your eyes.

     “If I knew that then I would have done something else, Ocha-chan!”

     “Okay, okay. So let’s do this. Find him on Facebook and send him a message saying Tinder banned you. It has to be a bug from their end. I’ve read that it happens to a lot of random profiles.”

You blinked. Really? Or was she simply just trying to pacify you? You didn’t care, you needed the pacifying.

     “But, I don’t know his surname...”

     “(y/n)-chan,” Ochako took a deep breath, “You spoke to him for two days and you didn’t take his surname!?”

You undermined yourself pretty hard in the past, but right now, it had reached the pinnacle of it all. You felt low, you had lost the prospect of not only great conversations but a cute boy who even asked you out.

     “Try finding him on LinkedIn.” Ochako said, and you blinked.

     “LinkedIn?”

You could practically hear her nod, “Yeah. Just type in his workplace or education, whatever you remember from the Tinder app, and his first name. It should show you a result that matches.”

You couldn’t wait to try. You opened your laptop, while Ochako was on call, and did exactly as she told you. You typed in ‘Hitoshi’ and then his workplace, some gaming studio—for the life of you you couldn’t pronounce it, and your eyes widened. The first result was ‘Shinsou Hitoshi’.

     “Oh my God,” You gasped, “I found him!”

Ochako giggled, “Is it really him?”

     “I’d really not mistake that face anywhere, Ocha-chan! You’re a genius!”

     “Of course,” She said, giggling, “Send him a message then!”

Doubt said hello a second after, “But what if he thinks I’m some stalker?”

     “Tell him your account got banned. Just be honest. He might even appreciate the effort.”

You weren’t too sure about that, actually. Your hand ghosted over his profile before attempting to send a message; but, apparently, LinkedIn wouldn’t let you send a message to someone new—someone you didn’t already have any connections with. When you mentioned this to Ochako, you wondered if you were the stalker or if she was.

     “He’s on Facebook, (y/n)-chan. Just go for it!”

You gulped before opening Facebook, wondering all the while if this was entirely normal for anyone to do for a Tinder date, before typing in his name. It was the same picture he had put of himself on Tinder, and you gulped, unsure of what to send. Again, you did what you do best—went with your gut.

Hey! This is (y/n), from Tinder. So long story short, my account got banned and idek why. I just wanted to let you know that I didn’t unmatch/ghost you. I didn’t want to leave you hanging so I turned into an interim stalker to let know you this. Is there any way we can contact each other besides Tinder?

You breathed slowly, as slowly as you possibly could. You could feel a weird numbness asphyxiating you, unaware of how to proceed or what would happen next. You shut your eyes and released a breath, before falling back on the bed.

     “What’s wrong?” You could hear the worry in Ochako’s voice.

     “I don’t know...” Nothing made sense anymore.

Did you like Shinsou? You weren’t sure—but what you were sure of was how little you knew him. Was that enough? Was the fact that you had never met come into play here? Just because the conversation was easy? Or was it merely the idea of meeting someone through a dating app? You couldn’t like him. Maybe, it was a crush.

But, can you have a crush on someone you didn’t even know?

You heard a ping and you felt that familiar stomach flipping sensation you knew so well in school. You never realized how much that feeling was missed ever since you grew up.

You were quite practically rolling and squealing at the same time. Ochako joined you, not knowing what the reply was but she was merely just happy for you. 

     “He replied!”

     “In like ten minutes! So fast!”

You didn’t know how he could reply, considering the time difference and everything, but that didn’t matter. He had given you his number, and you were going to text him and that was that. 

     “So, should I text him now?”

Ochako hummed, “Not now. Wait till the morning.”

So, you waited until the next morning. As soon as you woke up, you remembered the details Ochako had given you and you carefully composed a message in your head. Saving the number into your contacts, you tried to send him a message—but it failed.

Heh? You thought before trying again, with each attempt failing each time. You felt nervous, wondering if something was wrong with your phone, before realizing you were late for work. 

Ugh, you thought before sending him another message, not bothered to tell Ochako about this.

Hey, so I can’t seem to send you a message, why don’t you ping me instead? It’s xy-xyx-xxxxx. 

As soon as you reached work, you forgot entirely that you had even sent him that message. For some reason, your manager seemed to know you had other things in your mind and was intending on squeezing the life out of you. You had never worked so hard in the entirety of your life but that Thursday, you felt God’s wrath. After 9 hours of painful clock time, you began to head home, feeling incredibly tired and done with everything there was about adulthood.

You checked your phone for the first time in 9 hours and your heart skipped a beat. Shinsou had sent you two messages, one on Facebook—

—and one on WhatsApp.

You freaked before replying to him, apologizing for the wait—apologizing internally a thousand times; and wondered if you’d get a response real quick. Judging from where you were, you realized you needed to get home first.

As soon as you reached home, you threw your bag on the bed and checked your phone again—nothing. You sighed before getting some food, constantly looking over at your phone, wondering what had gotten into you, wondering if you were the only one flipping over a Tinder date like this. You were sure Shinsou wouldn’t be responding the same way; he was in Iceland, he probably wasn’t even thinking of you! And yet, here you were, thinking about him all through your day.

You felt strangely pathetic. Were you so lonely that you couldn’t live without this minor excitement that a random stranger was giving you? It felt so odd.

You spent the next two days, not texting him. You wondered if you were intentionally ghosting him, but he hadn’t texted you either. You felt low, being proven that he had better things to do, but you had gotten your answer. Serves you right that you were excited over someone you didn’t even know. Serves you right for jumping over your head for a Tinder match. 

You sighed before hearing the familiar ‘ping’ of your phone.

You smiled a bit, feeling the sides of your cheek hurt. 

Sure, but won’t you be tired?

It was a second later did Shinsou reply to that. You stared as the conversation rolled on, before knowing for a fact that you weren’t meeting him tomorrow. Maybe on Tuesday? You thought, giving yourself the benefit of the doubt.

His message only proved that he did want to see you. So, that means, you weren’t the only one wanting to see the other person. This being clarified to you made it easier for you to accept your obsession over the purple-haired male, but you had to restrain yourself.

When Tuesday morning rolled by, you were very close to giving up. You texted Ochako all day, asking her if he had given up interest in you or if you were annoying or clingy or desperate and she assured you that you were neither of those things. She told you that you were overthinking, that Shinsou was probably busy, he went back to work after Iceland, so maybe he had a lot to catch up on.

You didn’t know when you took a blow to your confidence, but you had and it bothered you. You wondered if it was alright to test everything on one random Tinder match, but you sighed, giving up the entire thought process. You raged inside your head, but there was very little clarity left. You decided to let the day pass and see if he was going to text you.

He didn’t. 

It ran past 12 p.m. You had lunch on your own, staring at your phone the whole time, wondering if he had forgotten even. You felt your energy reduce in intensity before spamming Ochako about what to do. 

You couldn’t bear the thought of him losing interest in you, and you didn’t know why. He seemed interested, your conversations were really fun—you had a few things in common and he asked you out twice! 

What went wrong? Was he really that busy? Was he bored with you? Was he cat-fishing you?

It was then you saw a message pop in.

Hey, sorry about not texting. I’ve come down with a cold. The date’ll need to wait.

Your heart skipped three beats. You sighed before wondering why you hadn’t thought of the possibility of him being sick. You replied a genuine, ‘take care’, but in your heart—it was as if the universe was saying this wasn’t going to happen. You didn’t bother to see his further replies; you weren’t blaming him for being sick, you were blaming yourself for being so overtly excited by someone you didn’t know.

He’s just a Tinder match, you thought before collapsing on your bed after coming home. 

Ochako called you that night, and you revealed to her in detail about what you were feeling.

     “What’s wrong?”

You sighed, “I'm lonely. And I'm lonely in some horribly deep way and for a flash of an instant, I can see just how lonely, and how deep this feeling runs. And it scares the shit out of me to be this lonely because it seems catastrophic.” 

Ochako was quiet. 

     “Do you think Tinder was a bad idea?”

You scoffed, “It has to be. It just showed me how lonely I am. That’s what these apps do! They show you how pathetic you are, how lonely you are on the inside and it’s just... It just sucks.”

You don’t remember falling asleep that night. It was a Friday, and you knew what work had in store for you. However, you had nothing on your mind—you forced the thought of Shinsou to the back of your mind before walking into work with a clear head. You worked all day, ate lunch alone, worked again—not checking your phone, not bothered to read or be interested in anything remotely online. 

As soon as work was done, from the corner of your eye, you noticed notifications. You shook your head before rushing on home, before realizing you weren’t watching where you were going. 

Your office was on an incredibly important street. Sometimes, you met people you never thought you’d meet—schoolmates, enemies from the past, old teachers. You were thankful that you worked in such a location but sometimes, just sometimes, the fact that you worked on such a busy street proved to be a tad bit too... cliche.

You look up and your eyes met with purple locks and wide black eyes, shocked at seeing your form just as shocked as you were seeing his.

     “(y/n)?”

You blinked, gasped and stood up straight.

     “Did you follow me?”

Shinsou chuckled, “I think this is what they’d call a coincidence.”

Your cheeks suddenly felt warm, and you wondered how in the world he had shown up there before—

—his arm extended forward, a soft smile on his features.

     “Can I take you out for coffee then? You can’t imagine how long I’ve been waiting.”

I can’t imagine? You giggled before shaking his hand, I think I can.

❞

[blazetwin88]

Okay, so, weird post, maybe (but I'm kinda like, whatever at this point), but I wanted to do it anyways.

So some of you who have stumbled upon this account, might have read the bio for it where I state, and I quote, "A girl currently on a quest to find her sexuality". A sentence which I should probably have changed a while ago seeing as how that topic has developed recently.

But getting back on track.

I'm not entirely sure how this, sort of, works, the whole sexuality thing. Of course I know it's not something you like get a certificate on or anything like that. From what I know, and do correct me if I'm wrong here, "things like trans, gay, asexual, aromantic, nonbinary, and so on, are labels that we as people can give ourselves whenever we want and can just change them if something in how we feel changes. It's a label we decide ourselves based on how we feel towards our self and other people that no one except us can change." So it's sort of like a fashion style. We decide what we wear (if we have a choice some people can't exactly choose some types of attire, like school uniforms for example) and we base it on how it feels and looks to us primarily. Other people can influence our opinion, sure, but in the end is our decision to make, the same usually goes for hair styles and colours.

I'm getting off topic, sorry. But to get back, if it is the way I think, then (it's oddly simple and I'm defently over thinking things) I should just be able to say

"Right now, I identify as a Asexual Biromantic/Panromantic with a slightly bigger preference for females (I kinda only know one nonbinary person and I haven't exactly met them irl yet, so I'm not entirely sure whether I fit into pan or bi on the romantic part yet, it's a wip). But, because of the constant arguments from my parents regarding me being asexual, I'm kinda obliged to say that this label might change in the future (although I honestly doubt that).

It feels kinda weird and uneasy stating it like this, but that might just be my anxiety talking.

Some people might have just gone with a simple "I'm a Asexual but I don't know my romantic preference yet" instead of this rant I went on, but I just wanted to be sure I didn't offend anyone, stated false facts, or confused people. I want to be a person that people like or at least, don't dislike hate. But at the same time ranting might have that effect, but ranting is one of many things that I can't help doing.

I'm once again sorry for all this meaningless text, it mattered to me to say it, but that doesn't mean it matters to anyone reading. I hope you all take care during these times and I wish for all of you to have a great day.