#but the months of september-february are just so hard emotionally

[wormsdyke]

happy holiday season, best time of year to listen to snippets of teenage emo playlists while taking breaks from socializing in the bathroom

[caramellles]

my top 24 screenshots from 2024✨

thank you very much for tagging me @aurorangen!! it was great to remember this year!

i tag @mdshh @linalinsims @bakersimmer (but feel free to ignore) <3

january / it was yves and phoebe's birthdays. i just like these screenshots, i think they are very cute!

february / in february, i began to introduce a little more plot into my legacy, and i also decided to develop the plot in the direction of music (since my heiress's husband is a musician). that's how it all started!

march / the first appearance of new characters!

april / zane, nevea and baby in the belly. i love this screenshot, it seems so warm to me…

may / nevea and baby kyan are such cuties in the first screenshot!!! i LOVE it! also, i started experimenting more with processing. the second screenshot is one of my favorites in the granite falls adventure series. it was such a great trip for the kids to the forest with their grandpa! and we learned more about this adventure from phoebe's diaries <3

and, of course, in may, the story "along the oasis" began! to be honest, it was a difficult decision for me. i was worried that i wouldn't be able to switch to the full storytelling format yeah, i'm an anxious bby however, i decided to give it a try and that's how this story began!

june / the first screenshot is one of my favorites on my blog… how boys look at each other..

the second one was one of my experiments with editing. i think it turned out cool! this year i tried to be bolder in choosing the format of posts <3

july / i like each of these screenshots in its own way. they just perfectly convey the mood! i love everything about them

august / ohhh it was a month of emotionally difficult posts. i chose this screenshot from one of my most favorite posts from that period. moreover, i think this is one of my best posts of all time! it turned out to be quite cinematic and it conveys so many emotions… my poor bbies

september / screenshots from hospital posts! the first screenshot is related to devin's awakening, after which everything changed. i like the processing and composition! this screenshot is very important to me.

the second one is related to the lives of the characters i love so much, but i don't spend as much time with them in the story… i really wanted the moment when ernest proposed to nina to be very sensual. i hope i've managed to convey the love they have for each other

october / another difficult month in the history of my boys was there ever simple one? i tried really hard on the first screenshot, i wanted to convey some kind of desperation. i'm still learning how to use different visual techniques, but overall, i like how i did it in this screenshot. and the second one just seems very sensual to me

november / ooooh it was THE HARDEST storyline i've ever had. when i showed you devin's past, i was very worried that i wouldn't be able to convey everything that was in my head. there were SO MANY difficult topics that i wanted to show, but not to delve into them too deeply (just because it's too hard). and i'm incredibly proud of what i did

december / and finally screenshots from my recent posts that i love very much <3

[kinnporsche]

2023: a year in review.

thanks for tagging me @aejeonghae ilysm <3

rules: link your favorite and most popular post(s) from each month of the year and tag some friends!

january:

favorite (& most popular) post ⇢ the sixth installment of my kinnporsche + tumblr text posts gifsets

february:

favorite post ⇢ this gifset of tinn & gun featuring a bunch of beautiful quotes containing the words “i love you” most popular post ⇢ kinn & porsche’s first kiss on the pier (but make it purple)

march:

favorite post ⇢ kinn & porsche’s iconic almost-kiss in episode five because it’s everything in the entire world for me most popular post ⇢ porsche getting fingered for the first time basically (or at least that’s what’s happening in my mind lmao prove me wrong)

april:

favorite (& most popular) post ⇢ my entry for #kpappreciation week one (pretty much my absolute favorite gifset i’ve ever made)

may:

favorite post ⇢ just a silly little text post i made about missing kinnporsche because i’m still here emotionally most popular post ⇢ my entry for #kpappreciation week three that i’m still really proud of like we love green & yellow & cinematic parallels over here

june:

favorite post ⇢ my entry for #kpappreciation week six (once again probably one of my favorite gifsets that i’ve posted) most popular post ⇢ this pantone-inspired gifset i made for #kpappreciation (though to be fair it’s only got a few more notes than the gifset i linked above lol)

july:

favorite post ⇢ mile & apo’s iconic onstage kiss because i could literally watch it on loop forever most popular post ⇢ these stills from the hidden messages trailer (incredible, amazing, show-stopping, never-the-same, totally unique, etc.)

august:

favorite post ⇢ porsche’s bathroom breakdown because it’s seriously in my top three scenes of the entire show most popular post ⇢ more stills from the hidden messages trailer (trailer of all time let’s be honest)

september:

favorite post ⇢ this gifset of porsche in episode three because he’s my baby most popular post ⇢ porsche’s sexy ass by the pool wins this round (i mean of course he does)

october:

favorite (& most popular) post ⇢ this is literally the only thing i posted for the duration of october lmao

november:

favorite (& most popular) post ⇢ the kinn & porsche fanvid that took me like a year to finish lmao your bitch was struggling (still i’m really pleased with how it turned out so please watch/reblog i’m begging i worked so hard asdfgh)

december:

i posted nothing in december sadly :/

i’m tagging: @loveisactivated, @khaotunqs, @taeminie, @jimmysea, @mileapo, & @nattawins (but only if you want!)

[time-is-standing]

top 10 songs of february

- a bit late. I'm really sorry, these past two weeks were terrible. but let's skip to the good part

1. under the weather by CORPSE

as you might tell, I've been quite under the weather this past month, so yeah, fitting song to be in the first place. I love corpse, no matter what he does, his new music is always finding a way to my heart but this time... it couldn't have been more perfect even if he wanted to. I love this style, the song is pure perfection!

2. we've been loving in silence by MARO

ooooh this one. I don't even think it's possible to describe it in words. lovely rythm, immaculate beat, perfect lyrics. I'm obsessed.

"every crooked line in your back feels like part of me, your story's in my fingers, you'll never wash away"

3. Parasite Eve by Bring Me The Horizon

this month has been such a rollercoaster. emotionally, physically - actually, in every way possible. it was a tough one so I needed the support & energy this song gave me. I bought myself tickets for the BMTH concert this summer and I couldn't be more excited. I explored some of the new music with my bf and we found out another crazy coincidence: when I stopped listening to BMTH (right after that's the spirit) he started enjoying their music. it's all surreal.

4. September by Sparky Deathcap

this song never gets old. the line "we got fire" is on repeat in my head, it gives me such peaceful vibes (even thouh I know the song is not peaceful at all). I love it to bits.

5. i love you by Billie Eilish

I needed a calm song to fall asleep to as I've spent some nights in absolute terror and anxiety. I'm getting worse as we speak & don't know how long will these home-made methods help me out. hopefully, I won't go absolutely insane.

6. Watch The World Burn by Falling In Reverse

similarly to Parasite Eve, I love the energy of this one. I love FIR so much and these new songs are matching my style in music so well. I'm so thankful I found them again. to be honest, this song was sent to me through a group chat message from some new friends. I gave it a chance and fell in love instantly.

7. watch by Billie Eilish

"go ahead and watch my heart burn"

this is such a meaningful song for me. I never thought that one day I'll experience a healthy and "normal" relationship, but it happened & it makes me realize how much of my previous experiences were toxic. the weight of all those years are crazy. I thought of most of Billie's songs as some kind of strange love songs but realizing they never were any of that is an unique experince.

8. So Long, And Thanks For All The Fish by A Perfect Circle

I was brushing my teeth, getting ready to leave my bf's place and he played the usual "getting ready" playlist but a new song occured on it: this one. I fell in love with the chorus and the vibes, I ran out of the bathroom to ask him what the hell the song was & why he never showed it to me before. we laughed a lot that day.

9. ZOMBIFIED by Falling In Reverse

the wake-up song. any time we're sleeping in and we have a hard time waking up, we start playing this gem and it works like a charm. I don't even know if I mentioned it but this new years' eve a friend - who has similar taste in music - played this at 2 am just for fun and I got out of my sleepy mood as soon as it started playing. that was the time I learned this song works, we didn't go home until 5am.

10. Call Me What You Like by Lovejoy

I loved this song so much, streamed it a bunch. my love for Wilbur will never leave my body, I am obsessed! I reread my Wilbur fanfic the past weekend and I'm so proud of it all. I don't think there's anything that's worth my time and energy more than this fandom.:)

[teenmomcentral]

Jenelle Evans recently made her return to the Teen Mom franchise following her separation from husband David Eason, but the former Teen Mom 2 star– who was fired from MTV in 2019– claims her marriage to David had been rocky for quite a while.

Ahead of her Teen Mom: The Next Chapter debut, Jenelle told E! News that she and David had been “going through ups and downs for six months to a year” before she ultimately filed for legal separation in February after more than six years of marriage.

“I was over it for a while and would tell friends that I’m over it and I’m going to leave,” Jenelle claimed. “But at the same time, it’s hard to leave when you’re both on the same deed to the house. It took me a while to actually get a little window of opportunity to leave, to file everything I had to file.”

As The Ashley previously told you, after parting ways with her aspiring rapper husband, Jenelle continued to live on The Land with her three children, while David began residing nearby on his and Jenelle’s broken-down boat. (Per North Carolina law, married couples must be separated for a year before they can officially file for divorce; during this period of separation, both spouses must reside at different locations.)

Jenelle noted that when she and David previously separated back in 2019, she briefly moved to Tennessee but returned to The Land after she “realized that if you just leave your house within a marriage, it’s called abandoning your house.”

“ … I didn’t want to do that and I had to come back,” she claimed.

According to Jenelle, she decided to end her marriage for the second time after David was indicted by a grand jury in January on a child abuse charge stemming from an altercation with her 14-year-old son Jace back in September. Jenelle claimed that she “didn’t want anything”– including David’s case, which is still pending– to come in between her regaining custody of Jace from her mom, Barbara Evans.

“So for him to come in between that, it was just a real breaking point for me as well,” she said. “I’ve been at the battle for Jace for years and it’s like, he’s finally here. So I’m not messing that up.”

(It’s worth pointing out that Jenelle’s statement seems to conflict with her actions immediately following the September incident. As The Ashley previously reported, Jenelle vehemently supported and praised David on social media immediately after David was charged with child abuse for his alleged attack on Jace. In fact, she later went on to insinuate that it was Jace and not David who was a danger to the family.)

In her return to the ‘Teen Mom’ franchise, Jenelle has opened up about some of her estranged husband’s other unsavory behavior, telling Briana DeJesus that David was both mentally and emotionally abusive towards her– allegations that David has denied.

“I cannot elaborate on any of that at this time but I can tell you that those things did not happen,” he told E! News. “When the truth does come out, you will all be very, very surprised!”

As you may know, Jenelle was granted a protective order against David in May that is in effect for a period of six months; however, she is still required to allow David to see their daughter Ensley.

[taylorrloverr]

Hey @taylorswift , Natalie here!!

I hope you and your family are staying safe and healthy during this crazy time.

As you can imagine, I have a lot of extra time on my hands (yenno quarantine and all) and I thought I’d give you a lil update on what’s been going on with me lately.

Sooooooo in August 2019 I moved to Vancouver to pursue my dreams of becoming an actor. I’m from Winnipeg, so leaving home & my family for the first time was a hard adjustment to say the least (you best believe I listened to/sobbed to “Never Grow Up” the first night I was alone in my apartment).

I had about a month to adjust before my full time acting program started in September *** FUN FACT ALERT *** During this month of adjusting, I went to my first soul cycle class (yenno to get out of the house and try and meet some people) and it just so happened to be “Taylor Swift Themed” so we only listened to/rode to your music!! (Fate right?!?) Anyways, I had a moment in the bathroom before class started where I just cried because listening to your music in that soul cycle studio was the first time Vancouver felt like home. And I know that sounds dramatic (lol hence the whole acting thing). But I found it really hard living on my own for the first time and going to that class and just hearing your music picked up my spirits so much!

Fast forward to September.....Now when I say this program was the hardest thing I’ve ever done, that would be an understatement. It pushed me in so many ways. Mentally, emotionally and physically. There were so many times I didn’t think I could do it (or there was literally someone telling me I couldn’t do it), there were so many days where I sobbed because I was lonely and missed home, but I still kept going because I know you have to fight for your dreams. You taught me that 😊

I graduated end of February and moved into my brand new apartment!! I’m so excited to start decorating and baking and just making it my home. If you have any tips on decorating or organizing or some good recipes please share some! I’d greatly appreciate it 💗💗

Of course this was all before the virus became as serious as it is now. So I ended up flying home to Winnipeg to be with my family until everything settles down. It’s so nice to see everyone (I haven’t been home in 6 months) but it’s hard knowing I left my new life behind. And I’m not going to lie, being laid off from work because of the virus has been stressing me the fuck out lolllll (rent prices AM I RIGHT???) But I know I just need to appreciate my health and everything I have and not stress about what I don’t have.

My school was going to have a showcase at the end of March. I auditioned two pieces (a monologue and a partner scene) and got in for both! Unfortunately it had to be cancelled because of the virus. I understand that it was a necessary measure but I’m disappointed because it was going to be my big shot at getting an agent. But I know whatever’s meant to be will be.

Anywayssss I’ll wrap this long ass essay up by saying thank you. I’ve literally grown up listening to your music (11 years strong babbbyyyy) but in this last year, your music has really been there for me more than ever. It was something I could always count on to lift my mood or to make me feel understood and like I wasn’t alone. And yaaaa idk I just really appreciate everything you’ve done for me 💗💗💗

I love you so so much 💕

Stay safe!

-Natalie

[futurewriter2000]

2021, thank you.

I know a lot of people don't really do this but I wanted to say thank you to my 2021 because after everything that had happened this year, there was good and there was bad and I am thankful for both.

My January started with a heartbreak but it was a wile emotional rollercoaster that I went from dark to light in February. I had been dealing with one person most of the year. If I am honest with all of you, I've been dealing with him emotionally and mentally from December 2020 to September 2021. But it's okay because we have good memories and I am thankful for them. I am thankful for the lessons and for him especially. We just weren't meant to be in this lifetime. I'm going to miss him but to be honest through all the shit I went through emotionally- I want to thank all the good things that had happened.

I had the most amazing time with him in February. Always. That February morning was a day I will never forget. Never. I was extremely happy in February. Extremely happy, happiest I had been in my entire life. Even if we don't talk anymore, I am so thankful for him.

By the end of February I started getting closer with my childhood friend and we started going on walks that helped me immensely to talk about my situation. She's driven and exciting. I am thankful for her that we reconnected.

In March I got my ears pierced with a friend that I grew extremely close to. It was a real bonding moment for both of us and she is my sister's best friend. Now we were never much close but that day we got close and this New Years she gave me such a good speech telling me how much she loves me having around her. How much she loves my energy, my whole personality- me for me. And if I am not thankful for that as well, then I must be a fool. A blonde beauty. I wish her so much joy.

April started with the same heartbreak as January, only this time I had more memories to reminisce about. More things to miss about him. I was wrecked. Somebody put a bullet through my heart and he was staring me right in the face as he did so. I cried on the bus, I couldn't hold up the tears and the lump in my throat. God- it was so hard but me and my coworker, who is also another childhood distant friend, we got close and it was like having a big brother I could joke with. We started bonding, talking, having fun. I swear if it wasn't for him, I don't know how I would have gotten through this heartbreak. Now they are still friends and I don't mind it really but he? God, am I thankful for him because he was there to make my day brighter when all there was was darkness.

Memories started catching up in May but I decided one thing. I want a tattoo and I did get one. It was a butterfly on my back and that day I promised myself that I will mark it as "hope". My hope that I can evolve into that. That one day I'll get wings to fly. Transform into something so much more beautiful. Also my tattoo artist is so hot but that's not the point. He gave me a protector and my butterfly is protecting me from all the negative energies that try to get in the way of my path. I am thankful for my own protector.

June? What happened in June? I quit my job. I couldn't deal with it. Everything was rapidly changing and I couldn't keep up with it. I was lost. I was so lost. But I'm thankful for that rock bottom because sometimes you have to go down to get back up stronger. It's a stupid analogy but it works because you can't go more down than the lowest point in your life. You can only go up and I did.

July wasn't really easy but I pulled it through. I started moving my body and I started reading and painting and drawing and loving ife again. I forced myself to reconnect with myself. Who I was without him? Who was I alone? I had my family there for me. I am thankful for them.

August was challenging enough. I had to get my priorities straight. June and July were my rest months. All the time I had, I put it into that. Now I had to go create my life again and I did. I got my job back and it wasn't a really fantastic thing to do but it was different. The memories faded. I was different. Nothing there reminded me of him and my coworker was still there. We reconnected again. Though it ended a bit dramatic with me, my childhood best friend and me hit a rough patch that ended in November or something. I was furious, betrayed, upset but I'm thankful for that because it made me realise that sometimes, you have to work on friendships to keep a strong, good one.

September was easier. It was so much easier. No more memories, no more nostalgia, except at times it still started to hit but I met someone. More or so, we reconnected. An old friend and I started catching feelings for him, which I still hold to my heart. We went to the ZOO together and that was... not yet that moment. I started to open up more and I devoted my time to my friends. The butterfly started to finally have some wings. I also got fully vaccinated that month but I remember how betrayed I felt by that same friend I reconnected with, after my second Pfizer doze. It doesn't matter though because he is still one of my closest friends. Like I said... a good friendships is to be battled for and I am so thankful for him- so thankful for him.

October I got happier. I could enjoy myself. I changed my hair. I read books, I went out... I felt freed. I got so close with my friends. All of them that I am thankful for them more than any word can describe.

November hit a rough patch on the family part. There were some court things going on but I did reconnect with the childhood best friend that we got in fight in August. Around that time I met another guy and he is such a good friend now. I didn't know he would be though back then but he is. Me and my childhood best friend... she appologised, we worked through and it was the effort of both. Our trust level is amazing. We have good communication, we have boundries that we both respect and now I love her. Like a sister, a soulmate, going through this life together. It was the simplest, most fun month I had in my life. Everything was just perfect at that time.

December has a lot of stress. A lot of stress. December started off rough. I donated blood, I worked my job, that friend I got my ears pierced with had a birthday party at her home and it was a blast! It was so fun. My best friend... I started appreciating her more, loving her more. I met so many new people and my love life started to develop. I got most of the month off because of holidays and all of that. I got another tattoo. A scorpion to protect me. Another protector. Another mark. Another reminder. I changed my hair again, I got sick and my nose is still a bit delicate. I got another job that pays so WELL! So good. Met such great people. It is amazing how much it can happen in a month.

Wow.

I am so thankful for 2021. New Years spent with close friends... January spent hungover at work... AMAZING.

I look forward to see where this year will take me.

[queenofmoonstonetarot]

Full Moon in Virgo ♍︎

The Full Moon in Virgo is happening February 27th 2021. In this Full Moon in Virgo, we are completing the 6 month cycle which started on the New Moon in Virgo on September 17th 2020. Try to think of where you were/what you were feeling/what you started on September 17th 2020. This Full Moon in Virgo is bringing completions to our life. Look at your zodiac sign, which house is the Full Moon ruling in your horoscope, try to think of September & what you were going through. Is it coming full circle this Full Moon in Virgo? You can expect personal goals to be reached. Use Virgo’s energy to stay motivated when everything feels slushy, gray and dreary. Buy that new planner you’ve been eyeballing. You’re going to need it. The Planet Virgo rules the 6th house which is symbolic of work life and routine. This full moon I ask all of you to take a deep look at your routine & get determined in your career. Use this energy to get stuff done. Virgos pay attention to every single detail!

Aries & Aries risings,, Full Moon in Virgo triggering your 6th house of health, work & routine. I want to urge you Aries to pay attention 3 days before the 27th of February & 3 days after as well. The Sun & Moon is making an amazing aspect in your second house of Uranus of income/finances. Positive news & recognition at work this Full Moon in Virgo for you. Health related issues you have been worrying about within the last 6 months will be going away because I feel this Full Moon in Virgo will be making you feel in tip top shape. In work you could be feeling really appreciated & working with others in your career feeling pleased. My Dear Aries, You guys have received the Death card which is symbolic of endings & new beginnings. Think back to September 17th 2021, how much has your life changed? Your life has just reached a complete cycle. The Full Moon in Virgo is asking you to release the old you fully & to move forward with the new people in your life, the new you. It's time to acknowledge all the change that has happened & that change is the chapter of your life has ended.The constellation number for the Death card is number 3 which is the number in tarot that is symbolic of creativity & collaborations with people at work & creativity that you have projected in your life.

Taurus & Taurus risings, Full Moon in Virgo is happening in your 5th house of love, romance, creativity, fun, self expression. Feeling very content right now Taurus’s. It is a fantastic time to be with friends & loved ones. You might be getting a new unexpected opportunity to pursue your longer term plans very soon Taureans. The 6 of Wands is the card that I received for the Taureans for the Full Moon in Virgo. Think of the last 6 months, September 17th 2021 was the start of the cycle & now the cycle ends in the Full Moon in Virgo on February 27th 2021. What in your life is coming full circle? The 6 of Wands I feel I am getting a pull to career & passions. I do feel there is positive movement forward in regards to your career. This card is about victory, personal power, movement in your career/job, a new job or promotion. This energy is having people giving you the recognition you deserve & how much has changed for you during the virgo cycle. You are making progress in your life. Taureans be proud. The Six of Wands is a positive encouragement to believe in who you are and your accomplishments so far. Have faith in what you’ve done and how others will receive it.

Gemini & Gemini Risings, Full Moon in Virgo is happening in your 4th house of family roots, home life & the past. Both the sun & moon are in aspect to your Uranus in your 12th house. At this time you can be hearing really positive news from a family member or in regards to your home. You will patch something up this full moon within the home or a close family member. You will feel empowered this Full Moon in Virgo. The 2 of Pentacles was the card I got for you Geminis. During this Full Moon in Virgo I feel you guys will be finding that balance in your life again. I feel that time management hasn’t been the best in your life recently but I feel you guys regaining that balance in all aspects of your life during this Full Moon in Virgo. I also feel that finding balance with your family will be balanced again at this time. Your finances will start being secure & stable again. I feel at this time your priority will be family this Full Moon.

Cancers & Cancer risings , Full Moon in Virgo is happening in your 3rd house of sales, siblings, communications & short distance. The Full Moon is active 3 days before February 27th & 3 days afterwards. At this time you are receiving good news in communication with others around you, receiving good news from people abroad that you know & making plans to travel. Mental Health wise you will feel stable & may look back at the last 6 months & feel that you have learned a lot. I pulled the Queen of Swords for you Cancers this Full Moon in Virgo. I feel that you guys will be very blunt & upfront with your wants & needs to others around you & yourself. The Queen of Wands is a rational, clear thinker who is very patient. I feel that this Full Moon in Virgo will be a good time for you to reflect on your thoughts & actions from the past 6 months. You may feel like withdrawing from your life to think about yourself & your direction in life.

Leos & Leo risings, Full Moon in Virgo is happening in your 2nd house of values, self worth & income. Leos can expect great news in finances during this Full Moon in Virgo, possibly a bonus, a new business deal, may hear news of a raise. You are feeling very confident in finances. Ace of Pentacles was the card I received for you Leos. The Ace of Pentacles is all about newness in finances. I feel that there is a sum of money you will be receiving around the Full Moon in Virgo on February 27th 2021. This card can mean getting money from investments you have made, new ways of income & promotion. You are being handed wealth this Full Moon Leos & I feel a sense of you feeling secure & stable. I also feel you will feel very grounded during this time as this card is an earth card & the sign Virgo is an earth sign.

Virgos & Virgo Risings, Full Moon in Virgo is happening in your 1st house of identity & physical body. You seem to be reaching a point in your life where you feel satisfied with a certain love partnership or business partnership that is paying off beautifully. You will feel aligned from a mentality perspective. There is a high chance if you or your partners were waiting on news to legal institutions, you will get the positive news during this Full Moon in Virgo. I pulled the 7 of Pentacles for you Virgos. Virgo’s there is something that you have put a lot of energy/hard work into & while you may be reaping some rewards it is not fully completed yet, this is where the 7 of Pentacles comes in. This card depicts a man who has grown this money tree but the tree still has more potential, this full moon in virgo you will be paying attention to details in this regard ( as virgos love to do), I feel you will be revauliting your plans & how to go about this. Keep going, your hard work is paying off, the potential is endless.

Libras, & Libra Risings, Full Moon in Virgo is happening in your 12th house, also triggering your 6th house of daily routine/work. You are completing a process of introspection. You seem to be resting/ isolating during this Full Moon in Virgo. You may have realized this Full Moon in Virgo you need to let go of certain people in your life, especially friends that are no longer in alignment with who you want to become. Libras, the full Moon in Virgo is going to hit hard for you as I pulled the 5 of Cups, I feel someone you had to leave in the past will be coming up when you are feeling sad during this Full Moon in Virgo. The 5 of Cups is feeling emotionally isolated thinking of relationships in your life. I feel that you could be feeling sad this Full Moon in Virgo. The Five of Cups shows you that, even though things aren’t going your way, new opportunities and possibilities are waiting for you – but only when you are ready. It’s time to shift your mindset and focus on what can go right from this point onwards. Be open to the brighter side of life and know many blessings are in disguise right now. Instead of giving in to a ‘glass is half empty’ perspective, look at it as the ‘glass is half full’.

Scorpio & Scorpio risings, Full Moon in Virgo is happening in your 11th house. You are going to be enjoying the Full Moon in Virgo the most. Relationships are going really well this time during the full moon. It’s a fabulous time to go out with friends. Ace of Cups was the card you received. I feel you guys will be feeling emotionally fulfilled with an outpouring of emotions. It may be that… Scorpios will be showing emotions?? I feel all relationships around you will be going very well. I feel you will feel this sense of vulnerability where you are sharing your feelings more than usual. There is a new beginning or new stage happening in a relationship during this full moon in virgo. You could be getting closer to someone or being more committed to someone. I feel a lot of healing energy will be happening in relationships for you this full moon in virgo.

Sagittarius & Sagittarius risings, Full Moon in Virgo is happening in your 10th house of career, public status & reputation. You may be receiving a massive acknowledgment from your boss. You are getting good news from work & or co-workers. I got the 3 of Pentacles for you guys. The 3 of pentacles is symbolic of collaboration, working with others to get things done. I feel Sagittarius will feel very determined this full moon in virgo. You will be getting stuff done around your home, things you have pushed off will be getting done as well. The 3 of Pentacles is about people getting recognition at work. In your work/career you are making progress & deserve to give yourself a tap on the shoulder. Foundations for your future are being laid out.

Capricorns & Capricorn risings, Full Moon in Virgo is happening in your 9th house of foriegn lands, foriegn cultures, society, spread of ideas, marketing & advertising. You are going to be loving this Full Moon in Virgo. You are completing a cycle of study or planning somewhere to travel. A fantastic time to promote an idea or marketing/advertising your creative works. 8 of Pentacles was the card I got for you guys this Full Moon in Virgo. The 8 of Pentacles is about focusing on one goal, taking your time & almost at completion. You are focusing on being a “master” at something & your hard work is going to be paying off. The #8 in tarot numerology is significant of success & luck. I feel that if you have been questioning if you want to go to school this is your sign Capricorn to go back. This is also the card of inner strength, think of how much your life has changed since September 17th 2020 when the New Moon in Virgo was in effect how much has your personal power grown.

Aquarius & Aquarius risings , Full Moon in Virgo is happening in your 8th house finances, values, intimacy & self worth. Securing the resources to invest in your home, investments in real estate or getting fantastic financial news. I received 9 of Cups for you Aquarian’s on this Full Moon in Virgo. The 9 of cups signifies feeling emotionally fulfilled & content where you are right now in the present. I feel a lot of things are falling into place in your life where you can feel stable & secure. This card is about feeling comfortable in your own skin & also financially comfortable where you can splurge. This is a very positive card to count your blessings & to feel genuinely happy. The Full Moon in Virgo will bring you blessings.

Pisces & Pisces Risings, Full Moon in Virgo is happening in your 7th house of marriage, business partnerships, partnerships & relationships. Uranus is aspecting the Sun & Moon in your 3rd house with communications which is really positive . You seem to be reaching a higher level of commitment in a relationship. Resolving communications & relationships in your life. 3 of Cups was the card I received for you Pisces. This Full Moon in Virgo for you is all about relationships, I do feel a strong pull people from the past could be reading out to you during this period of the Full Moon. I see a lot of social activity going on around the 27th of February. I feel surrounding yourself with people who make you smile & support you unconditionally. I feel a celebration, possible birthday party coming up for you as the 3 of cups are all about parties. The 3 of Cups is also about emotional fulfilment with relationships in your life including family.

[murfeelee]

End of Year Collage - Best of 2020

Rules: Find your fave pics of your story or your blog in general and post them up in a collage! :D it can be 1 picture or 100 whatever you want. But just reflect on your fave moments in your story or on your blog. It can be cute moments or pictures you’re just really proud of.

I did this last year and decided to make one for 2020, to celebrate simming, the one source of joy I got out of this crapfest of a year.

I used the TumblrTop10 generator for my top CC uploads, which naturally get more traffic than my gameplay pics & photosets.

But I like giving a top 10 for my gameplay pics too, looking back at all my fave fandoms I incorporated into The Sims 3 throughout the year.

MY THOUGHTS (for each month) under the cut:

January: Skryim Werewolves

AAAAWWWOOOO~!

February: Voodoo & Necromancy

My theme for February was Voodoo and Necromancy. The irony doesn’t escape me that I had my best creative boost (focused on morbid/macabre themes), right before the pandemic hit.

March-April: Roaring 3020s Gameplay!

These 2 months were all about my futuristic-Asian-scifi-artdeco/nouveau save in Oasis Landing, where I give the backstory of how Sakura and Ryuu first met. I always describe Sakura as a faery from the future, and this is what I mean by that; she’s a jet-setting time-traveler. Y’all seemed to really like my posts of Sakura this month, particularly her arrival in Oasis Landing in March, and her One Four All challenge in April. But by far the post that got the most attention were my WIPs of Hotel Luck at the end of April, the headquarters of Ryuu’s best friend Lucky’s club.

May: Green Isle, and Malec’s Wedding!

May was totally dominated by my run-through of @crowkeeperthesimmer ‘s Green Isle (Beta) world. But the most emotionally driven gameplay pics I posted this month were actually from my Shadowhunters saves, where I finally got around to recreating Malec’s wedding, which I posted on their 1st year anniversary. ^_^ *blasts Ruelle*

June: Rainbows! 🌈

I started the month still gushing about how pretty Green Isle is, which was great, cuz it was Pride Month! 🏳️‍🌈 Because the events of Summer 2020 were downright disgusting, I had Bartros & Nagron, and Gwynburn & Malec do community work in honor of LGBT+ and Black Lives Matter solidarity.

July: Bleach Gameplay starts!

I have been dying to start sharing my Bleach inspired gameplay for months. Bleach is one of my Top 5 fave anime, quite possibly even Top 3 (it’s tied with Attack on Titan). So I tried my best to do the anime justice in TS3, giving me recreation of Episode 1, when Ichigo Kurosaki becomes a shinigami. I plan on doing A LOT more; it’s just gonna take awhile.  

August: Sakura & Ryuu in What? Magazine

Technically, my Sim Bin Collage Pt2 got the most notes this month, but that’s not really gameplay. Even though I posted a bunch of Dragon Age gameplay, people were far more interested in Sakura’s post, particularly my fake What Magazine post, where I trolled y’all with a tabloid spread of Sakura and Ryuu caught by the paps getting frisky in the park.

September: Dragon Retexture WIPs Pt2

According to the Chinese, 2020 is the Year of the Rat, but I was all the way in the Year of the Dragon, baby! #SquadGoals #BoyBandRealness (And I was back in Green Isle AGAIN, lol!)

October: Dragon Master

I love Simblreen, and the Halloween season; it always puts me in a creative mood. But the best inspiration I got this year was after my anime marathon binge of the Bleach spinoff, Burn the Witch, which gave me the idea to make dragons as functional magic broomsticks. I had the occult household from my Deathless gameplay test out all the CC I made for Simblreen. Everyone seemed to really like that, and I was so happy!

November: Shinto Shrine vs DA:I - Tevinter

Another classic example of the photosets I did the bare minimum on that get like twice the amount of notes as posts I’m insanely proud of. XD

I try to upload CC at least once a month, but I’ve had such low motivation this year that come November I was scrambling trying to think of something to make. Then TS4′s Snowy Escape EP came out and I was like BINGO. So I did all of that in a few days, really quickly, and cracked open my Moon Medicine save to test the CC & take pics. No big.

But I’ve been working hard on my Dragon Age INSP gameplay & pics for well over a YEAR, and I had been so excited to start posting my Tevinter gameplay with Dorian Pavus. That Blood Magic post got far less traction, but that’s like the best photoset I think I made all year. Crazy how Tumblr works. :\

December: A Bunch of Stuff Happened, Holy Cow!

First there was the Pinterest Challenge, which y’all really seemed to like. Then I did another installment of BrennaIvy’s Modern Male Project (which got the most notes for December). Then I did Magnus Bane’s birthday post for the Shadowhunters fandom, which is usually one of my more popular posts. But then I posted my WIPs of my Maximalism set, and y’all really REALLY liked that one, so basically I was so so happy this December! :D

__________________________________________________

Thank you everybody, followers, mutuals, lurkers, and all simmers who continue to support me and The Sims 3, and like my content!

Happy Simming, and Happy New Year!

[varsitycult]

Reading List 2020

One of my resolutions for 2020 was to read a book per month to incentivize myself to actually finish books. I’m geeked I succeeded and ended up reading 14 books plus+++. Sometimes you just start to feel genuinely fucking dumb; then you know it’s time to create new habits and engage in new hobbies : )

I was able to find a lot of books for free--I’ve included links below.

January --

“The Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents” by Lindsay C. Gibson PhD truly fucked me up. Lots of highlighted passages. Being almost a year removed from the revelations that this book helped me have around my own family dynamic, I’m really thankful with the amount of actual peace and contentment I am able to feel now.

February --

“Beyond Mindfulness in Plain English” by Bhante Henepola Gunaratana is the follow-up to “Mindfulness in Plain English”. Very helpful for more advanced meditative techniques, particularly around the Jhannas. Also highlighted the fuck out of this book. Not much to say about the book itself, it is more about the advances in meditative technique that can be gained from using the advice in this book....uh is there a difference idk 8 ) let us chat abt it

March --

“Fever Dream”/”Rescue Distance” by Samanta Schweblin. It was aight! Read it in one sitting one night under the impression it was a genuinely scary horror short novel, but wasn’t really impressed as a horror nerd, though I do appreciate Schweblin’s stylistic choices.

April --

“Perfume” by Patrick Suskind is a banger and I look forward to the end of quarantine when we will all engage in an end-of-Perfume-level orgy together : )

May --

“Chi no Wadachi” by Oshimi Shuuzou is genuinely the best manga I’ve read in a long time. It is an exceptionally well-executed psychological horror manga about an abusive mother and her son written by the same guy who made “Aku no Hana” (which I also read in May lol).

“Black Hole” by Charles Burns was both good and irritating! Really enjoy his artistic style. Could do without a huge percentage of his dialogue tho eheh.

June -- 

“How Nonviolence Protects the State” by Peter Gelderloss created a lot of space in my brain, which I think is the most valuable thing a book can give you--space from prior immediate cognitions. I started reading it because we live a few blocks away from where George Floyd was murdered; the way in which American (white) liberals choose to intellectualize violence and decide what an “appropriate” response is, when a vast majority of them never experience violence directly, esp at the hands of the state, is really telling of our collective psychological development as a country. ie our collective American ideology is always in support of the state. Let’s conceive of violence differently.

July --

“Paul Takes the Form of a Mortal Girl” by Andrea Lawlor was rad. Just read it.

August --

“Audition” by Ryu Murakami -- this was a long time coming, I guess. I watched Audition when I was maybe 13 or 14? It is a genuinely good Japanese horror film and so I bought a copy before I lived in Japan hoping to read it there (uh i didn’t lel). It was a very fast read; the pacing was odd, and there was a lot of weird theorizing about trauma, and also lots of misogyny (I mean you’d think so). I honestly didn’t feel much once the book was over. The movie reigns supreme here.

“Capitalist Realism” by Mark Fisher was also a long time coming, glad I finally read it. rip Mark ;-; you would hate this timeline.

and 2 shorts, “Lone Shadow” by Mia Nie and “Lady of the Shard” by GiGi D.G. BOTh really gOOOD!!!1

September --

“Kindred” by Octavia Butler was a ride.

“Chainsaw Man“ by Tatsuki Fujimoto (up to September) is just fucking so good, get Viz it’s only 2 or 3 bucks a month.

October --

“The End of Policing” by Alex Vitale is essential reading.

November --

“From Here to Eternity” by Caitlin Doughty was an overall poppy (to be expected) but very interesting exploration of different cultures’ relationships to death. It is hard to imagine growing up in Indonesia, participating in Torajan mummification practices, keeping your deceased loved one dressed and housed indefinitely after death. This book made me want to read more anthropological and religious stuff again.

December --

“Consciousness: A Very Short Introduction” by Susan Blackmore is what it is! At times her writing style is overly wishy-washy and concluding segments often feel abrupt and not succinctly explained but it was short and an adequate primer.

Books I Read A Lorge % Of:

“On Violence” by Hannah Arendt

“What Terrorists Want” by Louise Richardson

“The Origins of Political Order” by Francis Fukuyama

“Imperialism: Past and Present” by Emanuele Saccarelli and Latha Varadarajan”

“Neuromancer” by William Gibson

*Hoping to finish all of these in 2021.

[vanaera]

The Heart Holiday | Act 1 | myg

Synopsis: Valentine’s Day is declared as an official holiday. However, private companies’ standards dictate it’s only for the people who are currently in a relationship. Unluckily for Y/N, she doesn’t have this year’s PRS’ (Proof of Relationship Status) “in a relationship” box ticked – the only ticket out she can have to enjoy one paid week of holiday leave away from her hellish job. And more unfortunately for Y/N, everyone around her is oh so conveniently currently committed in a relationship. Except for one person: Min Yoongi, Y/N’s biggest critic in every pitch meeting, the picky guy who always picks on her, and the most annoying jerk of the century. Desperate for that holiday leave, Y/N strikes Yoongi up with an offer: Fake date each other two weeks before February 14, just enough time for the Department of Relationship Management (DRM) to consider processing your PRSs. After Valentine’s Day, they will go back to their own ways and never speak about whatever that may happen during the plan. Good, plain, and simple. That is until, Yoongi uncharacteristically oh so enthusiastically agrees to Y/N’s offer, leaving her thinking that she may have bitten something too much more than she can chew.

Characters: Yoongi x Female Reader

AU/ Trope: Office AU (Creatives manager!yoongi x PA!reader), enemies to lovers, fake dating

Genre: fluff, angst, comedy (the triple t(h)reat)

Wordcount: 11, 798

Warnings: Lots of curses from two emotionally-constipated characters (PG-15 Rating)

A/N | This fic is in part with FWL’s Valentine’s project, The Luv Library: Romance. I had this premise about a Valentine’s holiday for a while and finally, I got to use it for this fic.

next  | series masterlist

             Ten seconds are enough to look at Min Yoongi. Two seconds to look at his unkempt, unprofessional, and stupid fringes that nonsensically cover his already small eyes. Three to look at his stupid, smug smile. Another two for his overly-confident stance—leaned forward in his chair, elbows on the table, hands clasping together—as if he’s better and of higher power than anyone else around the room when he’s just a measly representative of the day for the Creatives Team. And the last three seconds—they are enough to look at his mocking eyes, his jeering gaze, and the arrogant quirk of his brow.

               This is the same look he gave to Y/N when he got promoted ahead of her. This is the same look he flashed to Y/N when he berated every word choice in her reports. And, this is the same look in his face when he ruined her presentation which could have been her ticket way out from this hellish job. Smug, arrogant, and proud, Min Yoongi is set to ruin Y/N’s life. And all Y/N could do now is glare at him and hope her eyes could set him on fire so it will be easy for hell to swallow him up and—

               “Y/N?”

               Y/N whips her head to her right, “S-sorry?”

               Nancy Kim clicks her tongue, “Why are you just standing there, glaring at the windows? I told you to distribute the copies among the room.”

               “R-right,” Y/N gulps and rushes forward. She hands the copies of last month’s Travel Loca issues among the representative of each department. Gracie from the Marketing Team sneaks her a small smile, which Y/N returns. However, that smile falls into a frown when she reaches the devil himself.

               “Good morning, Y/N,” Min Yoongi greets, chin rested on his palm. When Y/N doesn’t greet back, Yoongi takes it upon himself to wink at her. With a huff, Y/N slams down the copy on the table in front of him, enough for the glossy, firm cover page to hit his pile of notes and cause some pages to fly off the table.

               “Thank you, Y/N,” Nancy calls out, sighing. She waves away at Y/N and the latter takes it as a cue to sit back on her chair. Nancy leans back in her huge black chair, “Okay, let’s get the ball rolling. Now tell me something I don’t know.”

               Y/N seats herself on the chair by the corner of the room, behind Nancy’s chair, far from the round meeting table. Every team representative starts to report their progress last month and their suggestions for the next, next month’s issue. Meanwhile, Min Yoongi is still busy picking up his notes on the floor. When he’s gathered them back, now in a sloppy stack, he looks from his crouched position and flashes Y/N his middle finger. She flashes back a finger at him, grinning. Y/N looks down at her small pocket notebook.

               “Y/N – 1. Yoongi – 0.”

               So far, this morning is really good.

               Y/N hates Min Yoongi, and this is beyond an understatement. She hates him so much that the word “hate” started to become insufficient to describe her tantamount distaste for that man. Y/N blames his last name for that. “Min” should not be how his last name spelled. It should be M-E-A-N because that man is beyond mean.                

               When Y/N first met Yoongi, she knew there’s something off with him. He stands so arrogantly, so prideful as if he deserved every bit of the floor space of Travel Loca’s Main Office when he just got hired because there’s no other job-seeker that has actually applied. Yoongi looks at other people as if he’s any much greater than them. Lazy eyes, far-off gaze, indifferent façade—he just looks at you as if he’s listening when he’s actually just hearing so he can make some witty comeback. And Yoongi talks like a dictator know-it-all. He corrects every word people say here and there, like “Y/N, are you sure it’s ‘demonstrate,’ not ‘visualize’? We can’t physically see something if there’s nothing to see,” or “Y/N, you shouldn’t say ‘Xerox.’ It should be ‘photocopy.’ Xerox is just a brand, our junior high teacher told us so,” as if every word anyone says but him, will always be wrong. Yoongi talks as if no one but him will always be right and that everything around him does not deserve a bit of his attention unless they prove their worth to him.

               And it frustrates Y/N to no end that no one seems to see his real form but her. Because apparently, Yoongi is “amazing.” Yoongi knows a lot of foreign places, having traveled to Malta, New Zealand, Hawaii, and yaddah yaddah, making his first-hand knowledge essential to the Writing Department. Yoongi has a lot of expertise in various editing apps, and he’s willing to teach the tricks and nicks to it to anybody. Anybody but Y/N. Because behind closed doors, Y/N knows his true face:  Min Yoongi is a thick-skinned, double-faced bitch. That even if his name is on the tip of the tongue of anyone around the office every single morning, his quick promotion as manager of the Creatives Team a never-ending topic starter, Y/N knew the real story. Because Min Yoongi started out as Nancy’s Personal Assistant…just like Y/N.

               Nancy Kim is the best photojournalist in the history of travel magazines. God-tier even, because when Nancy is just an intern in The Traveler’s Foot, she wrote the best articles Y/N has ever read. It didn’t matter if they were about a cliché tourist spot that has been featured over and over again or something bizarre that could make anyone wonder someone in their right mind would actually go there. Nancy is the goddess of travel journaling and Y/N obsessively consumed every article she wrote during her entire senior high and college life. So, to be able to get accepted in a company Nancy built, as Nancy’s personal assistant, is a sweet as fuck dream come true. Y/N didn’t care if she has to go home by 12 A.M. or 1 A.M. as Nancy said PA’s always have to leave the office after their bosses left. Nancy just shows the dedication to work one must have. Y/N didn’t find it tiresome when Nancy has to send her back-and-forth for errands both for work and personal life. She’s learning how to be resourceful while being good at time-management all at the same time. She’s learned a lot from Nancy. So, seeing Min Yoongi be so lax at work after getting hired frayed Y/N’s nerves to no end.

               Yoongi doesn’t keep a tab on Nancy’s schedules just like Y/N does. He says there’s no reason for such rush to keep every event on track because Nancy will just cancel or push forward them anyway. It’s true, Nancy does sometimes mess up the week calendar Y/N arranged for her, but still, not tabbing anything on your work diary is still an evident proof Yoongi slacks of.  He even takes a nap in between work hours for God’s sake. Yoongi also likes to talk behind Nancy’s back: of how inconveniencing, overbearing, and unnecessarily over-the line abuser she is as a boss. He tells this to Y/N day in and day out. Yoongi even mocked Y/N’s work ethic as a “willing subservience to work slavery.” He mercilessly reduced her dedication to work as blind obedience to an authority for the sake of monthly paychecks instead of hard, honest efforts to learn the essential skills in travel journalism.

               And, it’s not a miracle no one finds out about this. Because when Yoongi is indeed caught, he finds one loophole in his and Y/N’s dynamic as co-PA’s for Nancy and implicitly, oh so subtly, turns it around against Y/N. Y/N remembers one time when Nancy berated them two for not inserting her friend Rosa’s son’s first birthday party into the 6 PM slot of one Monday in March. After her long sermon, Yoongi apologized for not encoding it into Nancy’s Schedule Work Sheet. Y/N handles Nancy’s Schedule Work Sheet, not Yoongi. Nancy knows this. So, after her 9-12 shift that same Tuesday, Nancy reminded Y/N of her replaceability in Travel Loca during one of the most tension-filled elevator rides in her life. She went home to her flatmate, Mina, in tears which did not permit her to get an ounce of sleep. Y/N turns up the next day at work, red eyes and red nose close to make Rudolph the reindeer run for his title, only to know from the call logs that Yoongi did not receive Rosa’s call because he was sleeping when Y/N outright told him to take over the phone because she needed a bathroom break.

               Min Yoongi is mean and Y/N has seen the last straw of her respectful tolerance to people ticked off by this insufferable man one cursed Thursday night of September.

               Thursdays are horrible. It is always assured to be the worst day Y/N will have in a week. Either an investor will change their mind about a deal with Travel Loca, or Nancy will lash out at her because of stress from stupid shenanigans of her rebellious teenage daughter—Thursdays always have it out for Y/N. Y/N can already tell this so when Nancy called for her at 10:30 P.M. to give her a run-down of her schedule for the weekends and the upcoming week. It is already an established routine that Nancy will have Y/N over to her office to give a schedule report at any time of the day. It’s just happened this day that Yoongi took a leave and Y/N shouldered every task to be done, easily wearing her out in the afternoon.

               Y/N is close to crying right now because of exhaustion and it does not help that Nancy is wearing a sour face. She does not even look up at Y/N from her laptop when she said, “Tell me this week’s schedule.”

               Y/N pulls up her notebook and traces her pen over her notes, “Tomorrow you have an 11 AM meeting with investors from VanTae Apparels. At 1 PM you will have an online meeting with our overseas partners, JM Restaurant Group. We also have to submit the Kim Yuna special feature by 2 PM and at 3 we have the Travel with RM to interview. And–”

               “Push the Travel with RM to 2. We’re holding the Yuna feature ‘til next week because Jennie is writing as if she’s still in college.” Nancy presses a hand over her forehead and huffs, “The Writing Department has been consecutively disappointing me with boring, generic articles. Are fresh pieces non-existent nowadays?!”

               Y/N looks up, eyes wide, hands sweaty.

               Nancy turns back to her laptop, “What else is on my sched?”

               “Um, O-on Saturday 4 PM, you are invited to your friend’s, Rica’s baby shower, and for 5, you are invited to Jungsoo’s son’s 1st birthday party. Then Sunday 2 PM is Hana’s sister’s daughter’s 1st birthday party. You are also invited to Nick and Ken’s wedding on Friday and–” 

               Nancy clicks her tongue, “Cancel them all. I have no time for these parties and meaningless chit-chats that always have these housewives bragging how great their husbands are or their children’s stupid what-nots.”

              Y/N nods and slashes through her notes, “Okay.”

              “So send them my apologies and give them a $300 gift instead.

              “Okay, ma’am.”

              Nancy turns her swivel chair to face her, “Did you get my daughter the unpublished sequel of The Swallowing?”

               “Yes, ma’am,” Y/N smiles, recalling her last week’s adventure and success. Maybe Nancy’s mood will lighten up if she knew how she accomplished such an impossible task. “I got to grab a copy after weeks of talking with R. Lewis’ manager. Luckily, R. Lewis caught wind that it’s for your daughter. So he agreed to give me the copy. I actually have it right now, let me go back to my table –” 

               “You don’t have to. Suzie changed her mind. She doesn’t like The Swallowing anymore. Return the copy and get her the unpublished sequel instead of Bird and Foe.”

               Y/N’s jaw nearly falls as she stammers, “S-sure, no problem.” Deep inside, Y/N cannot help but think to herself, “Yes, Nancy may be fickle-minded and forgetful of differences in company protocols that intervene with such transactions, but she cannot just disregard my hard work! All the money in my train tickets and brain cells have gone all in the drain for nothing—Okay, calm down, Y/N, this is Nancy. Nancy can help you to write the best articles in no time. This is just training for the real deal—

               “Y/N, did you hear me?”

               “S-sorry, what?”

               “I said, where’s the USB I told you to get from my laptop at our home? I need the files for the JM Restaurant Group.”

               Oh shit. The USB. Y/N told Yoongi to get it since he lived nearer to Nancy’s residence in West Street than her. And since, Yoongi’s on leave, the USB is—!

               “And first thing in the morning, I want you to go to the Writing Department to get some fresh stories. I do not want to personally see them or else I will be able to fire one whole department in a day.”

              At this, Y/N fiddles with her fingers. “Umm, I think I have a story.”

               Nancy quirks her brow.

               Y/N wrings her hands behind her back. “I-it’s not yet polished and I still have more to cover on–”

               “So, you’re already telling me it’s bad before you even pitch a formal proposal –”

               Y/N’s eyes widen and she rushes to Nancy. “No! I-it’s about the Write and Backpack Trip Club. The-they’re a club of unpublished writers, usually late 30s, who met on Facebook and decide to travel together to the countries or places their stories are supposed to take place.” Nancy tilts her head and Y/N picks up her tone. Her hands start to quiver with her voice as she says, “People think—people think it’s hopeless. Like, like, they’re wasting their lives on something so trivial instead of focusing on their jobs. But this club gave them a purpose to still reach for their dreams even when people tell them it’s already too late. And I just,” Y/N wipes a stray tear on her cheek–which she doesn’t know if it’s because of her attachment to the club, Nancy’s new orders, or her frustration at Yoongi for leaving all their responsibilities on her–but she sucks them up and breathes out, “I find it really inspiring to have the courage to seek out your purpose when everything in the world is against you.”

               Nancy stares at her, brows furrowed. Another drop of tear falls from Y/N’s eyes. Nancy fixes her eyes back on her laptop. “The USB, Y/N, I need it now. A.S.A.P., capiche.”

               Wiping her cheeks again, Y/N nods, “Ye-yeah, capiche.”

               Y/N could not remember any time she’s rushed out the office as fast as now. Yoongi’s cell is out of reach and nothing is present in Y/N’s mind but to just run out of the building. She needs to clear her mind. She has to think of a solution. She can’t go back to Nancy empty-handed. Nancy’s already unimpressed of her sloppy work for this day, much more at her uncalled emotional breakdown in her office. She will definitely get fired for sure this time.

               The cold dry wind hits Y/N’s face the moment she pushes past the large glass doors of the Rockfort Building. The night sky has blackened into dark indigo and the establishments that dot the neighboring grounds of the building have blurred into monotonous dim shops. With just their solar lights left on, the rest of the complex looked like a washed-out commercial center. The only thing that stands out has to be the small mango tree just a meter away from her—the center-piece and quite the only humanizing element of the harsh Rockfort Complex.

               Okay, this is great. Y/N always tend to get the best ideas and solutions when she’s standing near this tree. She proved this twice. First, when Nancy demanded her to re-do all their presentations for VanTae Apparel. Y/N managed to slay it by getting inspired by the mangoes and editing the templates to look like nature’s rendition of Van Gogh’s starry night, which happened to be the favorite painting of VanTae’s CEO. And second, when Yoongi messed up Y/N’s schedules for Nancy’s personal events by misnaming each invitation, this mango tree provided her peace to quickly fix everything up before Nancy gets to the office.

               Put your thinking cap on, Y/N. What should you do? Should you rush to Nancy’s house now? Oh no, maybe Yoongi already got the USB. Should you go then to Yoongi’s house? Shit, I don’t know his house address—

               “Here’s $25, sir. Thank you!”

               Y/N freezes. It can’t be.

               Y/N turns to her right only for her eyes to land on a man with a familiar jet black mop of hair, standing about two meters before her, talking with a blue-vested delivery man.

               No. No. No. NO. Min Yoongi cannot just swoop out of nowhere and sound so chirpy like that while I have to stress over a problem that I DID NOT create. I cannot get fired in a company I’ve spent my life on for two years just because of this man’s unreasonable incompetence!

               Fueled by the purest form of aggravation, Y/N stomps ahead and brushes Yoongi’s shoulder, making him turn back to her.

               “Oh, hi, Y/N.”

               “‘Hi?!’ ‘Hi,’ yourself, Min Yoongi!—"

               “Oh my God,” Yoongi rolls his eyes, “she’s Adolf Hitler again.”

               “Adolf Hitler?!” Y/N scoffs, “Say it for yourself, Min! You’re Hitler because you’re twisted enough to ruin my career because doing shit in yours is not enough. Where’s Nancy’s USB?!”

               “If you’re going to talk about work again, I gotta leave. If you didn’t know, a ‘leave’ is a leave.” He emphasizes the last syllable as he starts to walk toward the street.

               Letting common sense knock into her, Y/N momentarily disregards her pride and runs after him. When he rounds the corner of a clothing boutique, she slips by his side and places herself in the middle of the sidewalk, blocking him.

               Unlike his usual work attire, Yoongi is clad in a black hoodie and denim ripped jeans, an ensemble that remarkably turned to look horrible in 0.5 seconds just because he’s wearing it. Y/N deduces it’s just Yoongi ruining fashion because he 24/7 looks like an asshole.

               “What, are you just gonna stare at me?”

               Yoongi’s voice brings Y/N back to her purpose. “No, I’m here to tell you, you forgot to do your job—Nancy wants her USB for JM Restaurant Group right now.”

               “Well, I don’t have it, sweetheart. Work hours are already over so practically, I’m in no responsibility to do whatever the fuck Nancy wants,” the man quips back, smiling.

               Y/N cannot help but snap. “Why are you even here in Rockfort, then? You didn’t turn up for work and now you’re just casually strolling in front of our building. You didn’t take home at least a quarter of our tasks and dumped everything on my shoulders like an irresponsible, signature free-loader high school groupmate. And now you think it’s okay to tell me ‘sorry, I don’t have the USB’ when I told you yesterday to bring it today?! I cannot believe what an asshole you can be, Yoongi.”

               Yoongi raises a hand. “Okay, chill, tiger. To answer your question, I am here because my friends and I hung out at a bar near here. Not that you will understand, of course, considering your whole life revolves around work, work, and work. Ooh, and Nancy,” Yoongi grins. “How can I forget you idolize Nancy? Actually no, you worship her.”

               Y/N’s face falls into an indignant scowl, “I do NOT worship Nancy! I respect her. Which you also should do because she employed you, not the other way around. Also, I have friends! Mina is my friend!”

               “Correction, Mina is your only friend at work. And she happened to be your flatmate and college buddy first before you both had luck to also be co-workers. So no, your friendship with Mina is out of the equation.”

               Y/N opens her mouth to tell him Mina cannot be out of the equation when Yoongi beats her, “And second, how could I be a free-loader? A leave is a leave. Our job description did not say we should also take work home. You are the only one who does that because you’re paranoid. So don’t impose your so-called work ethic, that is actually masked obsession, to me because I am a mentally healthy person. I don’t want to have a stick in my ass like you do.”

               Y/N steps closer to Yoongi, making the latter cock a brow at her. “I’m not paranoid, Min. It’s you who is the problem. You don’t take this job seriously. You don’t take on responsibilities like a mature adult. You think you’re so great just because no one told you you suck at something when you were a kid. Well, let me tell you now. You suck at plain human decency, something that should be innate in every people. You’re so high up your ass you think you can just do anything and get away with it and you–”

               “If you’re just going to insult me, can you do that tomorrow? My food is getting cold.”

               Oh no. Nancy’s USB. Y/N closes her eyes and releases a long sigh. She thinks her eyes already did a 360 by the time she managed to fix her composure. She looks up at the man in front of her, currently giving her an amused look. Y/N’s voice cracks as she says, “Yoongi…This is the only time I will ask a favor from you. Please help me with Nancy’s USB. I just want to end this night and go home peacefully without her chewing my head off further more. So please, please, please, can you just help me for once?”

               “Hmm,” Yoongi scratches his chin, “let me think about it first.”

               “Yoongi, please!”

               “Okay, fine,” Yoongi grimaces, “considering you practically begged to me for dear life, I, as a human with pure soul will help you out despite all the shits you said to me—”

               “Just help me out!”

               Yoongi slaps your reaching hands, “Stop, I’m not yet done with my speech. Anyway, considering this as a favor, not a request, I expect a return of favor, too.”

               “Sure, fine, anything!”

               “Okay, I think I may or may not have slipped in Nancy’s USB in my bag,” Yoongi breathes out as he reaches for his black satchel. “Oh yeah, I totally have it,” he says, flashing the orange 32 GB USB in front of you.  

               What the fuck. All this time-!

               “Why didn’t you tell me you already have the USB?!”

               Yoongi nearly guffaws, “Didn’t I tell you a “leave” is a leave? Wait, oh my god, you should see yourself, sweetheart. You’re about to pop a vein.”

               “Min Yoongi, I fucking hate you!” Y/N snatches the USB from Yoongi’s hand and stomps back to the direction of the Rockfort Building. The man doesn’t seem to go on his own way though because Y/N hears him holler “Same sentiment too, Y/N!”

               Y/N doesn’t turn back. She just raises a middle finger up that she’s sure Yoongi will not miss. And he did not, for the man’s faint chuckles only continued.

               The travel back up to the 12th floor seems like the longest elevator ride Y/N has ever been on. Every additional second into the constricted metal box feels like a one-second deduction from her own lifetime. So when the elevator doors open to Travel Loca’s floor, the air is immediately knocked off Y/N lungs. But not because of relief. Nancy stands in front of her, bags in hand, and obviously upset.

               Y/N quickly steps out of the lift. “Nancy, here! The USB!”

               “You took too long. Just e-mail them to me. I have to cram-reading them in the morning anyway because a certain someone forgot to do their job.” Nancy brushes by her shoulder and steps into the elevator. “You know, Y/N, if I’m paying you to make my life easier for me and instead, you’re making it harder, your position in this company is useless.” Nancy presses the button for the parking lot. The doors close in front of Y/N, letting her see the disappointment on Nancy’s face for the last second of the night.

               Y/N goes home twenty minutes later, worn out, and ready to sleep the second she reaches her floor. But when she opens the door, Mina’s smiling face greets her, and she immediately rushes to the sofa next to her bestfriend.

               “Mina, oh my god, I have so much to tell you.”

               “Me, too!” Mina giggles, wrapping her arms around Y/N’s arms, “Can I go first though?”

               “Yeah, yeah, sure,” Y/N smiles, fixing her seat.

               “Well, remember last week when I told you I finally confessed to Mark?”

               “Mark, as in, the café barista Mark Tuan?”

               Mina jokingly hits Y/N’s arm, “Yes, what Mark would I be talking about?”

               “Sorry, you know how I get so spaced out when I’m tired and groggy. Anyway, what happened?”

               “Well, Mark finally said yes!” Mina bursts into a wide grin, arms outstretched in joy. “I finally get to date Mark!”

               “Oh my god, I’m so happy for you, Nana,” Y/N engulfs Mina into an embrace, “I can’t believe you’re finally in a relationship! I mean, who would not want to date you? You’re smart, pretty, and funny. The boys have missed out on you for seven long years. And now, there’s finally someone who has eyes and can see what a gem you are. And damn right, Mark would see that. It’s not every day he can have a gorgeous girl court him for six months after getting rejected twice.”

               “Oh my god, stop bringing that up!” Mina playfully slaps her back and Y/N chortles.

              “Okay, okay, I’m just joking. What I really mean is: Mark is a lucky guy. I’m glad he finally realized what an idiot he will be if he rejects you again for the third time when you’ve been with him through all his problems. He won’t find another beautiful girl willing to ride his motorcycle with him in a huge-ass dress just to help him deliver orders in time. You’re the total package Mina and I’m so happy Mark has realized it.”

              “Oh, Y/N, you’re making me blush,” Mina laughs. She sways the both of them in their hug, “Mark has an impossibly high standard to meet now because of you.”

               “Mark doesn’t have to meet any standards,” Y/N snickers, “You already drool at his face the moment we enter The Daily Bean.”

               Mina detaches herself from Y/N and dramatically places a hand over her chest. “How can you remember that so well and not who Mark is?”

               Y/N shrugs, “Because I’m not staring at Mark and eye-fucking him 24/7.”

               “Oh my god, I do not!” Mina giggles, making you laugh again as she hugs you tight once more. Mina’s fingers card through your hair as she murmurs “But you do know, Y/N, even if I’m in a relationship now, I’m not gonna leave you alone. Even if Mark will start to occupy the top priority in my life, it doesn’t mean you will lose your spot in the top-pest part of my list. You know you’re still and will forever be my number one, right?” Y/N hums at that, closing her eyes from the head massage Mina is currently giving her. She feels Mina nod, “Right, you should because you’re practically my baby.”

               “No, I’m not.”

               “Yes, you are! Who would wash the red stain on your pants and underpants in the girl’s CR while you prance around the cubicle only in a top because you bled through your bottoms during your period, much more, on our Christmas Party, other than me?”

               Y/N grimaces, “Oh god, you didn’t have to bring that up.”

               “You hit right through me when you said I eye-fuck Mark so yeah, eye for an eye, bitch,” Mina cackles as she finally unlatches her arms around her friend. “Anyway, I’m finished with my story of the day. Your turn. What happened tonight?”

               Y/N bites her lip, unconsciously easing an inch between her and her bestfriend. Mina is in a good mood today. Y/N doesn’t want to ruin it by ranting off about how horrible Yoongi is again. She knows Mina. She will listen to her rant about another bullshit done by her co-PA and she will also indulge in an insult-fest against the man. That’s just their dynamic: Y/N’s enemy is Mina’s enemy and vice versa. So as Y/N looks at Mina’s smile which doesn’t do much covering up her dark eyes, which have grown from staying up late to wait for her to come home for multiple nights on end, Y/N decides it’s enough negativity for the day.

               “It’s nothing, Mina,” Y/N shakes her head, forcing a smile on her face, “just another tiring day from work.”

               Mina tilts her head, “Are you sure?”

               “Yeah,” Y/N flashes her another smile as she heads for her room, “I’m totally fine. Just tired. Congratulations to you and Mark again.”

               “Yeah, thank you,” Mina replies, but the look on her face tells Y/N she’s unconvinced of what she said. Seemingly aware that her friend needed space, Mina turns back the TV. Before Y/N closes her door, she hears Mina chuckle to a punch-line in the airing sitcom.

               Y/N flops on her bed face down. If Yoongi didn’t put much of a fight and just handed her Nancy’s USB when he knew he already had it, then maybe this night won’t be so horrible. Y/N would have given Nancy her USB in time, and her boss could have acknowledged it as a peace offering to her unremarkable work performance that day. Y/N would have totally rejoiced with Mina with her full heart into it and not force a smile on her face when such an announcement deserves much more celebration.

               Y/N releases a stifled scream into her pillow. Thursdays are really the worst and it’s all Min Yoongi’s fault.

               However, what Y/N didn’t expect is that the following week will get much worse. The Writing Department is late in their deadline, causing the online publication of the September issue to be pushed in the first week of October, a big deal late to the releases of their magazine competitors. Thus, Nancy became more pissy and naggy, giving Y/N a cold shoulder for the longest streak in her work life. Nancy became more frigid when Y/N failed to get Nancy the copy of the unpublished sequel of Bird and Foe. Y/N tried her best, she really did. It’s just that the publishers of Russell Park refused to give another copy because they said they cannot give out two unpublished copies at the same time. Of course, this turned out as a lazy excuse to Nancy, making her dump additional workload on Y/N’s already staggering pile. But that was not what made Y/N’s last week of September the worst week she’s ever had. It was Min Yoongi getting promoted as a staff member to the Creatives Team after giving Nancy the unpublished Bird and Foe sequel.

               Ringing phones, staff members running to- and fro- the beige faux wood office floor, and the occasional requests for coffee from the break room–Travel Loca is buzzing with life as usual. But not for long though, because the clock hands are currently on 12:49 P.M. At 12:57, it seems everyone on the floor have gone silent. Almost everyone taps their foot against the floor. All eyes were set on the digital wall clock. Some have even glanced on their own wristwatches to check if the wall clock was right. The hands start to move. Everyone gulps.

               The hands hit one o’clock. Everyone scrambles off their swivel chairs. Some have bee-lined for the break room.  Meanwhile, a huge mass had created a bottle-neck of office workers at Travel Loca’s main door. No one is left on the staff chairs, except for one: Mina Young.

               The accountant slides her swivel chair to the left. Her hands meander through her large file cases and when she feels a cold, ribbed metal surface on her index, she smiles. Mina pushes the on-button and immediately, the then-silent office space has now become a replica of her own flat.

               “Good morning everyone! Today seems an extra sweet day than yesterday because you know what? I can smell and see the sweet aroma of those dark, chewy chocolates and those pretty pink balloons surrounding our streets. That’s right folks, Valentine’s Day is just around the corner! Which also means–drumroll for me, Alexa–Holidays are about to sweep in! It’s just three weeks to go, folks, note that! So, for our dear, sweet listeners, I hope you already got your hotels booked and your plane tickets ready so you can finally have that amazing buffet, relaxing spa, or a fun tour around places you’ve never been with your very lovable significant others! I’m sure all of you will have that wonderful, exciting, and pleasurable rendezvous away from school, work, and any responsibilities. Just make sure to channel in on our station if you want the best playlist to get you in the mood for some steamy, passionate, and intimate time–”

               “Mina, will you turn off that radio?”

               The short-haired brunette frowns at her friend, whose also frowning at her. Mina pushes up her glasses on her nose, “Why? You know I always listen to this station during break time. Plus, Nancy is not here.”

               “Still, it doesn’t excuse how irritating that DJ sounds.” Y/N rolls her eyes as she plops herself on another swivel chair. “His voice sounds like there are two styrofoams gyrating each other in a sweaty club.”

               Mina’s jaw drops as she turns off her portable mini-radio on her desk. She faces Y/N with a frown this time—actually a scowl now. “Kim Seokjin’s voice is like creamy velvet to the ears! Also,” she scrunches her nose in disgust, “you did not just sexualize non-living objects so casually as if you’re not aware that the mental image you’re painting is so disturbing.”

               “First off,” Y/N turns to her, swivel chair squeaking in her abrupt movement, “you’re already seeing Mark Tuan for you to have any weird fantasies about Kim Seokjin and his voice or how cute his laugh is when it literally sounds like he’s an old man dying on a choked-out old joke. And second, sexualizing objects is not illegal by law and even if it so, I did NOT sexualize them. They are just the perfect representation of how Seokjin’s voice sounds.”

               Mina purses her lips and props her elbow on her desk to cup her face. “Cut to the point, Y/N. Just tell me what is with you today. You barged in furious in here for no reason, threw a fit at the break room, and now you’re ruining lunch by insulting Seokjin for something so trivial.”

               “Trivial?! His voice is fucking irritating! Just because he’s handsome does not mean his voice will also sound good on the radio. It’s like listening to a whale dying while making mating calls–”

               “The point, Y/N?” Mina cuts you with an unamused look.

               You deflate in your seat. “Fine, it’s Min Yoongi. He made it a point that he is more intelligent and capable than me in our 10 AM meeting with Nancy for this month’s spread. Said he knows more about weird facts and trivia about Sweden because I never got to travel outside this fucking country when I damn well know he only uses some advanced search engine to look for info like the computer whiz that he is! I went so many times on his Facebook to know he posts nothing in his wall but his work achievements—and his dog! Of course, if you went outside the country, you will post pictures in your wall, ‘cus social media sites are just platforms masked as an outlet for free expression when we damn well know it’s just a place where you can brag and be not called out for being arrogant. And damn hell, Min Yoongi does not have any out-of-the-country pictures posted there. What only comes close is his picture of that gumbo he said he made—yeah, quotation marks—because it looks too good to be made by his ugly crooked hands and even if it’s got this aesthetic background not expected to come from this fucking country, I still think he just photoshopped it.” Y/N crosses her arms, “Bet that gumbo did not even taste good.”

               Mina scrunches her forehead, “Are you the only flawed person Min Yoongi sees? Why does he always have to nitpick every single bit of your work? He just criticized your last week’s report because of your ‘poor articulation.’”

               “Right?!” Y/N leans back on her chair. She groans, “I still remember how he sabotaged my files for Nancy’s professional and personal events. Who in their right mind would change the contact names to mythical creatures? Rica’s 2nd baby shower was named ‘Merlin’s Demon Baby’s Party?’ It’s a baby event for God’s sake!” Y/N looks at her friend, “I swear Mina, one day I will get a brain hemorrhage because of Yoongi’s shits.”

               Mina winces, “Please don’t. I don’t want to be the one to tell your mother you already died before you even managed to pay your housing loans.”

               “Hey! Don’t attack me like that,” Y/N slaps the back of her friend’s chair. Mina, choking on her spit first, erupts into a fit of giggles.

               Unfortunately, it seems lunch’s fun will be cut short as Y/N hears Nancy’s megaphone’s speaker start up, “Calling for Y/N to come into my office. A.S.A.P!”

               Y/N scrambles from her seat as Mina sees her off with a sad wave. Pushing through Nancy’s glass door, Y/N could see the lines of ridges forming on Nancy’s forehead before the latter can even eye her.

               “Y-yes, Ma’am? You called for me?”

               Nancy pins her a look, “You’re asking me if I called you? Are you deaf? Did you not understand what I said?”

               “Yes!—I-I mean on the understanding part, yes, not about being deaf or something hehe-“

               “Y/N,” Nancy clasps her hands on her table, “I called you here because I have something important to tell you.”

               Y/N nears her table, pulling up her notebook and pen.

               “I need you to work in the Creatives Department for the next two weeks.”

               Y/N’s fingers freeze. She looks up at Nancy with eyes as wide as a goldfish. And before she can brain-filter out her words, they’ve already escaped her mouth. “What do you mean I have to be in the Creatives next week? I’m your personal assistant, not Min Yoongi’s!”

               “Y/N, I didn’t say you will work for Yoongi. He’s not the head of the Creatives. Steven Spielberg is,” Nancy gives the girl an unamused look, waving her off from her desk. Y/N bites her lip as she takes two steps backward. She didn’t know she’s rushed up too close to Nancy’s table just at the prospect of Yoongi and her working together came from her boss’ lips.

               Nancy leans back on her chair, “I know you two have this petty children-in-the-playground fights ever since the start of October last year. I get that your differences are too great to be bridged anytime soon, thus the reason why I grew tired telling you to stop doing your cat and dog thing because I know you two wouldn’t listen anyway. You two just like to bang heads whenever you like—”

              “But, it’s Yoongi’s fault-”

              Nancy raises a finger, “But, Y/N, this is really important. I will be out-of-the-country for the next three weeks for both some business and family matters. Hence, why I cannot bring you with me as usual. And why I will need you to work under Steven for the meantime: to report to me about any of their progress. The Creatives’ current designs will have us late into this month’s deadline and I do not want this business going down anytime soon because of a weak holiday cover. So, as my PA, you will report everything about their progress to me, and you will report my feedback to them. At the same time, you will tame your childish fights with Yoongi to a minimum so Travel Loca will function as well as it can be while I’m not physically here. Understand?”

               Y/N nods, “understand, Ma’am.” She doesn’t have a choice even if she wanted to object. Whatever Nancy dictated is already set in stone.

               “Also,” Nancy looks at Y/N, “since I will be off the next three weeks, my schedules for the weeks in my absence will be pushed and packed on the following week. So, I expect you to still work on your station—and work even harder after I came back. Understand?”

               More workload? Y/N internally groans. She doesn’t like work getting reduced early into the week then doubling into hell in the latter part of the month. She likes them evened out—everything is balanced, familiar, and predictable. Nevertheless, Y/N only nods, “yes.” “No” doesn’t exist in Nancy’s dictionary.

               Nancy returns to her laptop and waves her off, “Okay. Then, capiche.”

               “Yes, ma’am, capiche,” Y/N makes a quick bow and scampers out of her boss’ office.

               When Y/N reaches her station, she sinks herself into the cushion of her seat. First, Min Yoongi belittles her researching ability in the morning meeting. Then now, she will work with him for the majority of three weeks. After that, another hell will start because of Nancy’s incoming packed schedules.

              Y/N’s eyes land on her laptop and she immediately sees her calendar. January 16, 2020. Thursday.  Y/N releases an inhumane groan. Of course, the goddamn Thursday curse. When will she ever live?

.

               “When will I ever die?” Y/N sobs into Mina’s shirt. Her friend keeps her arms around her tight as she cards through her hair.

               “Hey, don’t think so negative,” Mina coos, “Think of this as an opportunity to finally have Nancy off your back.”

               “Yeah, as if working with Min Yoongi is better than that. He already ruins my life when we only physically encounter each other in meetings and breaks and lunches. Imagine working with him for a whole fucking day!”

               “Okay, okay, I’m sorry, I take that back,” Mina hugs her friend tighter.

               Y/N continues, “And after enduring all that, my workload will quadruple when Nancy comes back after three weeks! I already experienced this during her daughter’s debut last year. When Nancy said a pile of work will come, it fucking means four metal file cases of work. I spent the last two weeks of August plunging myself into an abyss of papers. I did not sleep for two weeks straight! And now— I will have three weeks-worth of hell work to come after spending three weeks working with the personification of Satan. Can the world just eat me up?!”

               “Wait, wait, wait, wait,” Mina pulls away to hold her bestfriend at arms-length, “What did you say will happen in three weeks?”

               Y/N closes her eyes, “Another hell will come because a shit-pile of work is coming in three weeks! Mina, I’ve been telling you this since morning-”

               “Y/N, after three weeks, it’s Valentine’s Day.”

               Y/N’s eyes immediately shoot open, “What?”

               “Look,” Mina clicks on her phone and flashes Y/N her calendar app. “Today’s January 17. Exactly after three weeks is the Valentine’s week.”

               Y/N’s jaw drops ajar, “Oh my god.”

               “Yes, Y/N, oh my God. It’s the fucking Heart Holiday.”

              “…The country’s long-time problem with their low birth rate has driven the government to build another department that will help its citizens build, manage, and maintain healthy relationships. The Department of Relationship Management was established in 2015, and ever since then, there have been impressive developments in our country’s birth rate. One of the best programs of DRM behind this wonderful growth is the Heart Holiday, the holiday held in the week of Valentine’s Day. It grants any person employed in a private sector one week of paid holiday vacation leave as long as they are currently in a relationship. Meanwhile, education establishments and students are given one week off their academic calendars without regard to their relationship status. Isn’t that sweet? The only downside to that, folks, is that government employees can only have two days of paid holiday leave on the 14th and 15th. But, still, a holiday is still a holiday! So for our lovely listeners, start planning your vacation trips and hangouts! Especially when Cloud 10 Airlines is there to make your holiday week even sweeter with their 70% discount on local trips! Just contact 675-9859 and 568-987—”

               “Mina, can you turn off the radio?!”

               “Again?!” Mina heaves, “What’s with your aggravation streak these days against Kim Seokjin’s voice?”

               “It rattles me,” Y/N half-screams, plopping into the swivel chair next to her friend’s cubicle. “Yesterday, he already announced that goddamn timeline of the DRM and ‘all hailed’ importance of the Heart Holiday. Why does he have to repeat it again today? In that overly-enthusiastic voice, too, as if he’s never read of that script again and again?!”

               “Y/N, it’s how broadcasting works. It’s one of the most awaited holidays in the year, so of course, they will nab as many advertisement deals as they can.”

               “Well, I don’t like how they work!”

               “You cannot just tell a radio company to stop working,” Mina turns in her chair to face her friend, “Also, stop venting your frustration on Seokjin. He doesn’t even know you hate his voice. Routinely doing this noise pollution doesn’t do anything at all. Just tell me what made you upset today.”

               “It’s Yoongi!” Y/N scowls. “He won’t explain to me the technical editing terms on Steven’s report for Nancy! He said a five grader can even know what they are. I went through fifth grade, Mina, and I did not freaking know about any photoshop shit!”

               “Well, that’s because you’re old.”

               Mina looks up and sees Yoongi hovering her cubicle.

               Y/N’s scowl deepens, as she turns her chair to the direction of the intruder.  “As if you’re any much younger. From what I know, you’re four years older than me, dumbass.”

               “Well, at least I know what Steven is talking about,” Yoongi props his chin on Mina’s cubicle.

               Y/n rolls her eyes, “Because it’s your freaking line of work! Of course, you’ll know about it!”

               “Well, you’re now working most of the time in the Creatives Team and you don’t know it. What does that make you, then? I’ll give you a hint: It’s what you called me three seconds ago. Starts with the letter ‘d’ and ends with the letter ‘s.’”

               “What? You think you’re so smart now just because you know that vector-mask-thingy?! News flash, Yoongi, you did not graduate with any Latin honor. I did! So, who’s the real dumbass?!”

               “You damn well know Latin honors doesn’t actually have any effect on real life. Practical knowledge has—especially knowledge about terminologies used in digital designing. Which you need because you won’t be able to report anything to your god Nancy. Because, well: You. Don’t. Know. Anything. Like. Always.”

               “Min Yoongi, fuck you–”

               “Guys, guys, guys, can you stop?”

               Y/N gives Yoongi another glare before fixing herself back in her seat. Mina puffs, “Yoongi, can you leave us alone for a while? We’re talking here and you just invited yourself in our conversation.”

               Yoongi chides, “Well, tell your friend that if she wants to shit-talk a person just a meter away from her without the said person barging in the conversation, she should keep her voice on the down-low. Not screaming around like a crazy ape.”

                Y/N’s jaw drops open, “What crazy ape?! You’re the crazy ape! You look like a fucking gorilla who accidentally get dwarfed by a tooth fairy and-”

               “Min Yoongi, just leave us alone,” Mina gives the man a pointed look.

              Yoongi shrugs and detaches himself from her cubicle. He heads back to their office but he doesn’t completely leave the room without giving Y/N a middle finger.

               Y/N’s mouth drops open in disbelief. She turns to Mina. “See? Isn’t it obvious he just wants to make me the bad man to Nancy again? What kind of person are you to not cooperate with your co-worker like a goddamn adult? I don’t get why no one sees this bitch’s true face but you and me! I just want to freaking tear off his face, make him wipe it in his ass, then place it back on his head since he’s such a literal ass—”

               “Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Mina clasps a hand over your shoulder, “don’t get too homicidal. What you just said, aside from disturbing, is very disgusting.”

               Y/N slumps in her seat and crosses her arms.

              Mina sighs. “Okay, yeah, I know, Min Yoongi is the worst. But I don’t want you to do anything stupid so let’s not talk about him for a while, ‘kay?” Y/N nods. Mina leans back in her seat with the nth sigh for the day. “Okay, I got some update from Jaehyun.”

               Y/N leans forward. “What did he say?”

               Mina gives you a sad smile, “He already has a fiancé.”

               “So soon?” Y/N scoffs. “He was just courting me two months ago.”

               “Yeah, well he’s getting married this week. Whatever,” Mina waves off, “I don’t like him for you anyway. He dresses like a college fuckboy.”

               “Okay, what about Dahyun?”

               “Already married.”

               Y/N’s eyes widen, “and she didn’t tell us?”

               “Yeah, I already nagged her on the phone. She said it all kinda happened too fast–her and Sana. And the marriage was in New York. We’re too broke for out-of-the-country trips to attend anyway if we were informed.” Mina smiles, “She said she’s gonna invite us to the Christening of their baby.”

               “Okay, I’m glad she still cared about us. Oh,” Y/N pipes up, “what did Jackson say over the phone?”

               Mina gives you a tight smile. “Getting married, too. And guess what, the invitations were already in our mail box when I went to get our bills.”

               “Momo?”

               “Engaged. She and Heechul just broke out the news a week ago.”

              “Sam?”

               “Married. And 4 months pregnant.”

               “Jongdae?”

               “Engaged. Also has a baby in way.”

               “Hana?”

               “Engaged.”

               “Changmin?”

               “Engaged.”

               “Jaebum?

               “Engaaaaaged.”

               Y/N throws her hands in the air, “Why is everyone getting married?!”

               “Well, we’re in our late 20s. It’s the “marrying age” they say. It got more enphasized when DRM’s programs had succeeded in encouraging hundreds of people to marry in the recent year. Even my mom already expects Mark to propose by next month. We’re just dating for 6 months!” Mina cringes. She pulls Y/N’s chair closer to her to hold her hands. “Y/N, I’m really sorry. It kinda slipped my mind that we always apply together for the Heart Holiday every year. It’s just that Mark and I—”

               “Hey, hey, don’t blame yourself. You’ve been pining after Mark for about two years and now look at you—together, stable, and in-love half into the year! I don’t want you to fret having a relationship with the boy you liked for so long.”

               “Yeah, Y/N, I know,” Mina closes her eyes. “It’s just sad and unfortunate everyone we know are already in relationships.”

               “Yeah…” Y/N nods and the two fall into silence. Why is everyone conveniently in a relationship just in time with the Heart Holiday? What, the whole world suddenly knew the loophole in DRM’s program? Y/N and Mina studied that for a whole year! This is unfair. Y/N cannot be the only single person out there who’ll miserably work in the office while everyone gets to have the time of their lives—wait.

               Y/N grabs Mina’s hands. “Hey, Nana, I know we said co-workers are off-limits because Nancy will definitely know it’s a ruse. She’ll block my application form before it can even have the seal from the HR. Especially when she found out our lesbian “relationship” was fake after you and Mark updated your civil statuses.” Mina winces and opens her mouth to apologize again but Y/N cuts her with a finger to her mouth. “Nancy will definitely call me a liar and grill my head if she finds out what we’re planning to do now. But look, Nancy’s out of the country. Teddy is the general supervisor and she’s the next in the hierarchy. We damn well know her 45-year-old heart is soft for some nicely-woven romantic story. Even more, in an office setting—the bane of every middle-aged woman’s sappy romantic heart. So, what do you say?”

               Mina lets out an exasperated breath, “That crossed my mind, too, you know. But, Y/N, the thing is—the whole Accounting Department is in a relationship. And the same goes for the Writing, Marketing, Logistics, and HR.  All of them are either in a relationship, married, or getting married.”

               “What?” Y/N’s eyebrows curve up high, “How come I didn’t know this?”

               “Uh, because you’re busy working for Nancy day-in and day-out?  Also, I just happen to be friends with Jisoo from HR. She’s in charge of the company’s relationship records. Sometimes, she slips in everyone’s stories while we listen to WWL Radio during break time.”

               Y/N bites her lip. This can’t be happening to her. Not now. Not when the most un-objectifiable reason for a break from Nancy is about to slip through her fingers like fine sand.

               Mina scratches her nape, “I…may have someone in mind though.”

               Y/N’s eyes look straight into Mina’s. “Tell me.”

               “Well, the entire Creatives Department is either married or engaged save for one.”

               Y/N holds Mina’s hands tighter. “Who?”

               “Min, Yoongi.”

               Y/N must be going crazy. She thinks she must be growing a nest of vultures in her brain now, the mother routinely picking on her numerous dead brain cells to feed to her young. It doesn’t help that the bags under her eyes have started to droop like a waterfall, forming a sad saddle of grey on her cheeks. She cannot even remember the last time she had a decent meal. All she remembers is the finger foods Mina hands to her station every once in a while.

              The universe is being unfair to her and it is all taking a toll on her body. They weren’t kidding when they said adjusting to a new environment is an entire whole work in itself. The Creatives Team runs a completely different routine. Large monitors crammed with multiple editing softwares Y/N cannot understand surround the studio-size office space. There are drafted papers and previous issues scattered in every possible corner, some even gathering dust by the floor-to-ceiling windows. Y/N is not even sure if anyone has re-arranged their desks in the last few months. The Creatives’ work ethic is loosely bound on schedules and everyone seems to be doing everyone else’s job.  Except for Y/N, because Steven is the only one willing to share their team’s progress to her. But that alone is not enough for her daily report to Nancy because Steven is always busy in his computer. More unfortunately, everyone is wary of her. Y/N’s sure she even saw Kim Myungsoo clutch their design folders closer to his chest when her eyes glanced at his cubicle.  

              Sure, Y/N expected everyone will have their guards up on her. Who wouldn’t be when they know Nancy still has eyes on them even if she’s countries away? But still, it doesn’t lessen the pain on Y/N’s self-esteem and the stress on her back. If Y/N can’t get someone to talk to her, she won’t be able to provide a more substantial report to Nancy more than just reading Steven’s printed reports verbatim.

              Y/N is desperate to find a workmate to discuss everything happening in the Creatives with her, but unluckily for her, she only has someone she wishes to not even breathe the same air with. Of course, no one in the Creatives wants to talk to her except for Min Yoongi. He’s an insufferable ass who doesn’t know when to shut up.  He welcomes Y/N every single day with an annoying “Yo, Y/N” and an unneeded commentary about her outfit, like how yesterday he told her “I know retro is in but I didn’t know grandma blouses are deemed stylish again.” He blabbers about his unnecessarily extensive general knowledge about every South Asian country, even if Y/N countlessly told him she didn’t care.  He brags about the cover designs and templates he did in the previous issues, flipping the pages too close in Y/N’s face while he speaks about colors and mixing like Y/N is an imbecile about basic color combinations high school students used in their PowerPoint presentations. Yet despite them all, Yoongi still refuses to explain to her the jargon in Steven’s reports.

              Y/N tried her best to keep herself from bursting and giving Yoongi an earful of sense. Yes, everyone knows she does not like Yoongi but Y/N doesn’t want them to know to what extent she can go to express them, afraid of embarrassing herself.  But in her defense, three days into the first week without Nancy, Yoongi has gone as far as to chip a small bit off Y/N’s mug in the break room. The mug with the “creative juices” in cursive printed around its body—Mina’s gift from college. Y/N’s patience meter was blasted off the roof. It will be safe to tell that at the end of the day, Y/N has screamed the hell out of Yoongi that everyone can be sure the latter’s ears may have fallen out of his head. Steven was close to reporting to Teddy what just happened. It was just Y/N’s remaining luck that helped her successfully and implicitly begged Steven not to do so by telling him calling Yoongi “a mean, inconsiderate, self-absorbed jerk who should eat his shit because people are what they eat and he is obviously the biggest shit in her life,” is just her “unique” way of expressing co-worker appreciation to the man.

              Aside from putting up with Yoongi’s Satanic attitude, Y/N has to endure Nancy’s intermittent calls with her forever pissed voice coming in first thing in the morning until in the late, ungodly hours. And despite Teddy’s patient guidance over Y/N’s “transition” to the Creatives Team, Y/N’s still close to digging a six-feet deep hole in her station. No, not because of Teddy or Nancy. It’s because she poured her remaining effort dedicated for work by spending the entire week going through every staff member of Travel Loca. Y/N thought Mina must have overlooked a face. That it’s possible Jisoo skipped on a detail she told to her friend. But despite learning Lee Minyoung from the Writing Department is going to call it quits to her boyfriend just after Valentine’s, or how Michael Park from Marketing is about to pop the ring to his girlfriend just right on Valentine’s Day, the looming fact Y/N dreads presents itself on January 24, two weeks before Valentine’s: No one else in the office is single but her…and Min Yoongi.

              Of course, it didn’t surprise Y/N, Yoongi must be single. With that know-it-all façade and condescending tone wearing you out like a 24/7 walking instruction manual no one even asked for, who would even like to date him? One week with him as a co-worker alone already makes Y/N want to throw herself into the flaming hot pit of the nearest volcano.

              But it’s only two more weeks before Valentine’s and Y/N is desperate and desperate times call for desperate measures. Y/N did a last-minute check-up on her and Mina’s lists of contacts—phone, social media, e-mails, everything under the sun—only to come up with nothing. Mina’s “marrying age” theory must be true because everyone, every single one, of their acquaintances are already married or getting married. Y/N then changed up her game.  She started to opt for resources she never thought she will ever use in her life: dating apps. Tinder, Bumble, The League, Grindr—name it, Y/N had made every account for every conceivable dating site. She even spent the most of her break time this week hiding her phone beneath her desk and swiping right. But even this last considerable option proved to be pointless as all the replies she received are either honest “sorry, not interested,” rude “you’re no fun,” or out-right salacious “suck my dick.”

              This then left Y/N no choice but to consider the most unspeakably horrendously unfortunate option she didn’t even want to have. Min Yoongi is her only choice left. And for that, Y/N spent two days making an elaborate plan. She can’t afford any loose threads or plan-holes that can further make her at the mercy of the infuriating jerk. However, even if she made everything as seamless as it can be, Y/N knows it will be the worst decision she’ll ever make in her life. Mina also expressed the same concern, even apologized for planting that small information about Yoongi in her friend’s mind. But even her friend’s day-by-day discouragement to push through with her plan is not enough to deter Y/N.

              Because even if just thinking about the plan makes Y/N feel the world is about to crumble and swallow her down in its unending, fathomless depths; even if it makes her want to set up an appointment with an exorcist, Y/N knew she won’t back out. It’s not viruses or bacteria, it’s a seeded idea that is the most contagious living entity that can take hold of any human being. And the moment Y/N realized there’s no other ticket way out of her dilemma but Yoongi, she knew this thought will haunt her for nights on end.

              This is the reason why Y/N’s currently standing by the corner of the Creatives’ office when it’s already 6:46 P.M. while almost everyone has left the office. Almost, because Yoongi, apart from her, is the only one left in the office as Steven requested him to finish a color palette by tonight. Y/N gulps a thick blob of saliva. Sweat runs thick on her forehead. God, if Mina could see what Y/N’s about to do, she will be already by her side, yelling for her to just give up. Y/N shakes her head. This is Mina’s fault anyway. If she didn’t plant the idea in her head, she wouldn’t have to do this. She wouldn’t be creeping behind a door like a disgusting stalker. She wouldn’t be profusely sweating in an air-conditioned room like a guilty murderer. She wouldn’t be-

              “What the hell are you doing behind the door?”

              Y/N shrieks and jumps a half-foot away from her spot.

              “The hell—what’s gotten into you?!” Yoongi frowns, “And why are you even here?”

              Y/N’s brows meet together in her forehead. But before she can speak, Yoongi’s snickers drown out the words in her throat.

              “Wait, don’t tell me you’ve come as far as spying on my work. I didn’t know you’re going to be this petty,” Yoongi sighs and puts his hand on his waist, “Well, if you think going through my work laptop will get you to understand Steven’s report, I’m sorry to say you won’t get anything, little girl.”

               Yes, it’s true. The words did die out in Y/N’s throat. It’s just flames of anger sweeping in the valleys of her mouth. Y/N surges forward, fists clenched tight, “‘Little girl’? I am not a fucking little girl!”

               Yoongi grins, “Then what should I call someone who’s a foot smaller than me?”

               “What fucking ‘foot’?! We’re just inches apart! Have you ever seen yourself in a mirror? You’re not even that tall!”

               “Says the one who’s looking up at me just to level her eyes with mine,” Yoongi raises his brows, “and who’s now standing a little too close to me because apparently, standing a socially-decent foot away won’t enable her to see my face.”

               Y/N’s eyes widen and she immediately takes a step back. She doesn’t get how easy it is for Yoongi to rile her up that she instantly forgets how to control her body. When she looks up at him, the man is smirking at her. Her mouth aches to tell him he actually looks stupid with that lopsided smile if he thought doing it will make him a tad bit inch sorry excuse of “sexy.” But then, Y/N remembers she has a purpose tonight. She didn’t just waste an hour waiting in the excruciating office space of the Creatives Team just to get nothing done.

               Y/N closes her eyes and breathes out. When she opens them again, she looks at Yoongi in the eyes. “I’m not here to fight with you, Yoongi. I’m here to make an offer.”

               Yoongi scoffs, “An offer? You? Are you hearing yourself right now? In case you weren’t informed, I don’t need anything from you. And I didn’t—”

               “You’re single right?”

               Yoongi gawks at her, “W-what?”

               “Well, I’m single, too. And Valentine’s week is coming in two weeks.”

               “So?”

               Y/N tries not to grit her teeth, “So, that means the Heart Holiday is also coming. Nancy is bound to come back during that time, too, with an obvious incoming large workload to come for me. I can’t afford to hole myself up in this office while everyone gets to enjoy a paid holiday week. And since you have an affinity for disliking your job, I figured you also wouldn’t want to go to work during Valentine’s week.” Y/N crosses her arms, “So I’m here, Min Yoongi, to give you an offer: Fake date me for two weeks to make it to DRM’s PRS’ application deadline. When our application gets approved, we part ways and never speak about what happened in these two weeks. It’s a win-win situation. I don’t get to work during Valentine’s. You also don’t get to work, and we both will still get paid. So, what do you say?”

               Yoongi just stares at her. Y/N could feel cold sweat running from her scalp and down to her back. Why is he looking at her like that? Why is he being so silent? Is he about to make fun of her and bring it up to work tomorrow? Oh God, Y/N shouldn’t have even gone through with this plan. This is a bad idea. A bad, bad, bad, idea that should have never been entertained and buried in a trunk of embarrassing memories, never to see the light again—

               “I’m in.”

               Y/N freezes, “W-what?”

               Yoongi takes a step closer to Y/N. He leans forward, closing the distance between their faces into mere six inches. Y/N doesn’t need to crane her head up anymore because this time, their eyes are finally leveled with each other.

              Yoongi smiles, “I’m telling you, Y/N, I’m in in your plan.”

              Y/N looks at him. She just looks at him. Five seconds have already passed. Yoongi should be laughing in her face right now. But the man did not, and takes a step back away from her. He fixes his satchel on his shoulder and closes the Creatives’ glass door behind him shut. When Yoongi looks back at Y/N, he gives her a shrug, “Hey, if you’re not going home, I am.” He heads for the main door, hands dug into his pockets. Y/N’s eyes just follow his figure. Before Yoongi completely gets out of the office, he hollers, a hand cupping over his mouth, “I said I’m already in in your plan. You can go now. See you tomorrow.” He sends Y/N one last smile.

              It takes Y/N five more seconds before she breaks her frozen stance. What did just happen? Yoongi didn’t laugh at her. He didn’t put up a fight. He….agreed? Just like that? This is impossible. This cannot happen! Yoongi doesn’t agree, he argues! Always! And he just doesn’t bid her goodbye and “see you tomorrow.” Yoongi annoys her with one last hit of “goodbye, grandma.” And Yoongi doesn’t smile. He smirks. He just pulls up one side of his lips, squints his eyes, and snorts. Y/N must be going crazy. This is not Yoongi!  A whole different man has suddenly appeared before her. This cannot be!

              But despite all the things going back and forth in her head right now, there’s only one looming thought on top of them all that had Y/N release a staggered breath:

              What the fuck did she just get herself into?

next  | series masterlist

Disclaimer: This first chapter is based on Netflix’s Set It Up (2018), particularly Nancy’s briefing scene and the USB scene. Netflix’s Set It Up (2018) is the inspiration for this fic and so I based Ms. Nancy’s personality on Lucy Liu’s portrayal of Kirsten Stevens! Ms. Lucy Liu was fantastic in her performance! That being said, all scenes and references from the movie used in this story are the property of its respective owners. The rest belongs to the author. This work is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement is intended. Anyways, if you wish to watch the movie, don’t worry about encountering any spoilers in this fic!

A/N pt. 2: Hi hons! I decided to cut this fic into parts as this will be very long (hello banter dialogues). Writing a 25+k wordcount (so far, this is my assumed final wordcount) may overwhelm a lot of readers and make them not want to read this anymore ☹ Anyway, the succeeding parts will be released soon as I already have a detailed storyboard and outline for this mini-series so you don’t have to wait that long. Thank you for giving this fic a chance, hons. Also, feedback is more than appreciated. Tell me what you guys think!  ♡♡♡ \(> u

Taglist: @fangirls94​​ @ditttiii​ @chogiyeol-utopia​​

All Rights Reserved 2020 © Vanaera. Reposts, modifications, and translations of content are not allowed.

[lunaleetarot]

Capricorn Year Ahead Birthday Spread

Starting from the top clockwise, theme in the middle.

1. December 2020- The World- This card usually means you will have a good outcome. You have completed one stage of your life, and now you're moving on to the next. You’re made your goals a reality, and now you want to make new ones. Often you see this card with newlyweds in marriage or someone who started their own business. You will need to get comfortable in your new life. This is a travel card. You may be more involved in issues going on around the world. With the pandemic going on, this meaning may not resonate with most of you but I want to point out that it is a potential interpretation. 

2. January 2021-Death- As we move into 2021, you are undergoing a transformation. Perhaps you were warming up to a new life change last month and now you're ready to make that change happen with the death card. Although the name of this card is enough to turn you off, it could mean something as simple as a career or love life metamorphosis. You will be faced with a life changing decision. Sometimes we need endings to move on to something better, so this may not necessarily be a bad thing. Usually this is a dramatic change. You won’t come out of this the same person you were before. Keep in mind this card does have a sinister meaning. This change is going to be drastic. It can mean literal death, but it doesn’t always have to. The best case scenario for your January outcome is that this is the beginning of a blessing in disguise. You will likely feel sad or depressed over these events and should take extra care of yourself. Especially if this is an unwelcome change. This is a Scorpio card, so you may be dealing with one of them.

3. February 2021-The Emperor- This February you are going to achieve a level up in status. You will be an authority figure, or will have an authority figure take you under their wing and pull you up. I feel this has to do with career advancement. This will likely be a male. This is a person you love, that is in a higher social standing than yourself. You will have powerful and stable people around you. It could be in your career, where people see potential in you and want to promote you or invest in you in some way. Remember you don’t know everything. There’s a lot to be learned from this person. No matter how smart or capable we are, we need to enlist help to achieve our goals. If this doesn’t apply to your career, it could be your father, father-figure or husband. This is an Aries card so you are likely dealing with someone of that sign here. 

4. March 2021- The Fool- While winter melts away and spring begins to bloom, you will go through yet another transitional period. New beginnings for you this Spring!  I feel like you had one stable month in February, and now your back at the drawing board ready to reinvent yourself once again. You will have a burning desire to try something new. In this case I think you should go for it! If you overthink it you’ll only come up with reasons why you shouldn’t. Perhaps you are comfortable in February’s stable situation but you don’t find it rewarding emotionally or spiritually? I feel if you follow your heart's desires, all will go well.  However if this is nothing but pure rebellion be mindful of what you’re doing. Don’t just run away from your responsibilities. If you are no longer happy in February’s outcome there is the “right way” and a “wrong way” to leave it. This card can also mean someone else will do the running from you, so keep that in mind. This may be a risk that has no promise of reward, as a Capricorn I’m not sure you will be comfortable with that. You may go through a period of uncharacteristic indecisiveness. On the positive sign I feel you will have a lot of fun this month. You will have a level of enthusiasm and a thirst for life that will help you recover from January. Just don’t let your behavior get too wild. Especially if mental health is a concern for you. 

5. April 2021- Four of Pentacles- In April, you are going to be holding on tightly to all you have. This is a card about possessions and possessiveness. You need to pay attention to how much your financial habits and health.  In more extreme cases, this could be hoarding behavior. Perhaps all the change you went through in the beginning of the year has made you want to hold on to what you have. However it’s unlikely you will want to share with others. You may be holding onto things that no longer serve you. This doesn’t have to just mean material things, it can be emotions or relationships you’ve outgrown but keep holding onto. In love, you may want your lover all to yourself. You refuse to let them go. This behavior may make you look needy or even worse obsessed. After awhile this behavior may annoy your partner and push them away. If you’ve been supporting a family member, you are no longer going to be footing the bill. You feel like you shouldn’t have to cover their groovy lifestyle. Or it could be vice versa. Assign the roles as you will. This could also indicate a revision of a will or inheritance. However if you have money, you are lucky to be in the position to hoard in the first place. Many are struggling right now and don’t have it as easy. Keep that in mind when you cling to your purse strings. There’s nothing wrong with being frugal, but don’t become cheap. This is your own card, so I feel this is your energy. However it’s possible you could be dealing with a fellow Capricorn.

6. May 2021-Five of Cups- In May you will be hit with a wave of sadness. You may have fallen into self pity and don’t know what your next move will be. This is a shift for you into being more concerned about your personal relationships than you have been for the year so far. This is a break up card. I feel the overbearing behavior from last month will bring your relationship to an end. This is going to be very hard for you to deal with, but rest assured there is someone out there who is better for you. You and this person you're having the break up with weren’t a good match, your personalities weren’t compatible. But you don’t see that yet. Your life is not over by any means, Capricorn. Nonetheless, you are feeling doom and gloom over it. You should seek help for your feelings from a therapist or people who are understanding in your life. Just don’t try to battle this alone. If that doesn’t apply. It could mean a  fall out in your career. This will seem bad at first but you will gain valuable experience. Divorce and strained friendships could be at play here. All is not lost here, you will get a second chance after the dust settles. The universe likes people who get back up after being knocked down. This is another Scorpio card.

7. June 2021-Seven of Cups- Halfway through the year you will be faced with decisions. You will be faced with many valid choices, and will have to pick one. To make it even more tricky you will have a time frame to make the decisions. If you don’t make your choice soon you could go from having many options to having none. You will also hear a lot of opinions about it too, everyone in your life is going to give you their two cents. Keep in mind not everyone knows your situation or has your best interest at heart. The work you do this month will dictate what your future looks like. One positive thing about having a lot of options is that you will be living a comfortable lifestyle. However nothing is guaranteed in your future so think about what's best for you down the road. This is yet another Scorpio card!

8. July 2021- Six of Cups- Something or someone from your past is going to reemerge this month. This is the “ex” card. So if you want to get back with your ex-lover this is a welcome sign. If that doesn’t apply to you this is also a family expansion card. A case of childhood nostalgia may resurface because you are dealing with adult responsibilities now. If you want to have a baby this card is a good sign. This card can also mean the house you grew up in, or town. It’s up to you to apply how this would fit into your life. On the negative side, there may be people from your past coming back that you don’t want to see, or old drama coming out when you don’t want it to. Something near and dear to your heart may vanish this month. Watch out, because this could be because you are neglecting the things you care about. This is yet another Scorpio card.

9. August 2021- Queen of Cups- You have a loyal female in your life with strong intuition. She’s sympathetic towards those she loves. This could be your own energy or a female who is close to you like your mother, sister or wife. This person puts others before herself. No matter what she has their back. Sometimes this can be a negative when you're looking at a situation with rose colored glasses. This card can also mean you need to take on the traits of this person. You may not be thinking of the other’s point of view or you're just being down right selfish. You should aspire to be more like the Queen of Cups. How can you be more understanding of other people’s feelings? You may be dealing with someone born on the Gemini-Cancer cusp (June 19-24).

10. September 2021-Ace of Cups- As we roll into September, we see the ace of cups which usually means a sweet and pure love! I believe this could mean the start of a new relationship for you! So expect your love life to be of interest to you this month. However this may not be a long term relationship, but enjoy it while it lasts. This is also a pregnancy card. Specifically the birth of a female child. If this doesn’t apply to you it could be your mother, sister, or someone close to you. This card can also mean a new beginning after a tragic ending. This card also means you will have a lot of dinner dates with friends and family. Hopefully we won’t have to socially distance anymore by then!

11. October 2021-Queen of Swords- With the queen of swords for your October, Halloween hi jinks will be the least of your worries. There will be a female in your business who loves drama and conflict. You may already know who this person is. She just wants to know the news of your life, she does not actually care about you as a person. Beware because this month she will be more involved in your life. This is a period of your year where you are going to feel very lonely. If none of this applies to you, it’s possible you need to adapt the queen of swords mentality. This person is very direct and to the point. I feel you are like this as well Capricorn. Even if she comes across as sort of a, well, bitch- at least others know where they stand with her. She tells it like it is. You may need to stand on your own two feet here and stop relying on others. You’ve got this Capricorn! You may be dealing with someone born on the Virgo-Libra cusp (September 19-24).

12. November 2021- The Chariot- This November will be a month of triumph for you! You will succeed in all of your endeavors this month. You won’t have any competitors. You will have an abundance of energy to make this all happen. However you may step on a few toes to get yourself in a higher status. The chariot can mean that you will use other people to get what you want. You should try to keep this behavior in check. Enjoy your accomplishments, but don’t live off them for too long. If you start to look down on others you will lose their respect. Modesty will benefit you in the long run. If you have a driving test coming up, you will likely ace it! If you are in a position of power watch how you treat your employees. You may be dealing with a Cancer here.

13. Theme of the Year- Seven of Swords- You or someone else in your life is causing trouble this year. Drama and conflict accompany this card. You're surrounding yourself with people who are not loyal to you. When they sell you out, it’s going to leave you feeling hurt and betrayed. You may get the blame for something you didn’t do. This is likely someone who is trying to cover up their own bad behavior. You will become the scapegoat. This person may be you. Consider if you are the type of person who tries to cover up their own bad behavior instead of facing the consequences. In less extreme cases this card can mean self-deception. You may be forcing yourself into believing you are happy with something you aren’t. This will start to affect you emotionally this year. Play your cards close to the chest. Be honest with yourself about what it is you truly want. You may be dealing with an Aquarius in this situation or someone of this sign will have a major impact in your year ahead.

[eclecticash22]

2021 Pick-A-Card: Pile One - Quija Pin

Hello, pile one! I hope you enjoy the reading and I hope your year is incredible :)

Themes for 2021

• The year 2021 is a year for better understanding yourself and what you deserve, and not settling for anything less. Setting boundaries is healthy and necessary for us to self-preserve. Allow yourself to be empowered and do not let others dull your shine.

• This year is also a year where you're going to be feeling quite abundant. Whether this be money, happiness, positivity, etc. You’re going to be receiving an abundance of something or many things.

• This year is an important part of a cycle you are in/will be in. I feel this pertains towards the Boundaries card, in that in order to progress forward, you need to set boundaries and feel empowered in your own energy.

The Months of 2021

• January: You're starting the year of strong and feeling good about things. You may have your sights set on goals and know exactly what direction you would like to go in. 

Charms: Angel #3 - Follow your intuition and use your skills to manifest your desires.

• February: Things will really start to feel lighter and better this month. You're on your way to incredible things! 

Charms: You may have a commitment happening this month! Your angels are with you.

• March: You've been working towards a goal, and that's great! You may have even achieved this goal, and have continued to work hard. Either way, well done! But remember to make time to relax, to take a break, and to have fun. 

Charms: You are in control of what you do in life. You are in control of your destiny. Life is an adventure, so make it your own. Be smart about things this month. A relationship could move to a deeper level. Share some love with those close to you.

• April: Be careful this month. Do not overindulge in anything and be cautious o who you work with. On the flip side of this, this card can also represent marriage. So you may get married this month, get engaged, meet the person you're gonna marry, or just make a commitment this month. 

Charms: You seem to have quite a bit of representation coming out about something "sweet" so remember, do not overindulge. Do try and have fun this month though, but know your limitations. You may be deciding on something this month.

• May: After some hard ship, you are bouncing back and feeling great. You may have a lot of ideas swirling around in your mind and may be on your way to new opportunities and goals.

• June: This month, you may be walking away from things that no longer serve you. You may be figuring out what you want in life, which may lead you to walk away from things that no longer match what you want. You're on the right path for you and are moving on to great things. 

Charms: Angel #5 - Balance. Learning from life experiences. Individuality is important here.

• July: Oooo, pile one! This month you may be finding something that you really fall in love with. Whether this is a person, job, or something else, you're really going to enjoy this. This is also the soulmate card, so if you're meeting someone new they could be your soulmate/become a soulmate! 

Charms: Angel #5 again! Interesting.

• August: Things may start changing this month as one door closes and a new one opens. Be open to receiving help, and be open to helping those who need it. Remember those boundaries, though. It's okay to help others, but don't give all of yourself. 

Charms: The wheel is turning and things will keep on moving. You're progressing forward wonderfully. You're on your way to success.

• September: You maybe feeling more creative and/or passionate about something, and that's awesome! Keep going! If you're working on a project, keep up the good work. If you're picking up a new hobby, keep it up. Whatever this is, keep that passion and creativity alive. 

Charms: Allow yourself the freedom to do what you love. Tap into your uniqueness. Surprises, good luck, and strength. Angel #1 - A reminder to pay attention to your hearts desires and to be aware of the thoughts your having.

• October: This month, you may be feeling great emotionally. You may be on a great headspace and feeling good. On the flip side, you may be overwhelmed or frustrated. Remember, it's okay to ask for help. 

Charms: Angel #1 carries over into this month as well. Something new may be happening. Something may be happening rather quickly or may feel overwhelming. Communication is important this month as well as nurturing yourself.

• November: Change is happening, and it may be dramatic. But don't worry! The tower may seem intimidating, but only because change can be scary sometimes. This change seems as though it will be a positive one. Have faith that things will work out wonderfully and hold on to the trust you have in yourself and the universe. 

Charms: Something or someone new may be entering your life. This could be in regards to education and/or work. Try to relax a little.

• December: A new beginning may be coming towards you this month. You will feel relieved and as though a weight is lifted off of your shoulders. You may be ending the year feeling good about where you stand, and that's incredible! 

Charms: Infinite love. Intelligence and Intuition. New projects or work.

Misc. For 2021

• Runes: Surprises or New directions. Gifts, relationships, prosperity. Passion, courage. New Beginnings.

• Shufflemancy: Song #1- So Yesterday by Hilary Duff | Song #2 - Song Like You by Bea Miller | Song #3- I Don't Wanna Love Somebody Else by A Great Big World | Song #4- Wicked Games (cover) by Ursula Vulpine ft. Annaca

• There is some symbolism of fertility in this reading, so if you're not looking to start a family/have more children then be careful and have protection there.

Important Notes:

This is a collective reading. If it doesn’t resonate? That’s okay! Take what does resonate and/or pick a new pile. This reading is for entertainment purposes. Any decision you make is 100% your own. I am not responsible for any decisions you choose to make.

[ener-chi]

Man. It’s been one hell of a year.

New Years is probably my favorite holiday out of all of them. It’s secular; but beyond that, I draw personal meaning from it because 1. I have absolutely no concept of time and it helps me kind of keep track of things that happen in my life 2. It is a time to reflect on your growth as a person. 

The latter is part of the reason that I keep a journal here on tumblr. It’s partly a way of me sharing my experiences with others, but for the most part it is a way of documenting my experiences, so that I can go back and look through them - either as a means of analysis, or of reflection.

So I went through all of my posts from this year (it took quite a while!) and here is what happened for me this year:

January - I went to the Fae Court for the first time... Holy fuck I cannot believe that that was this year! It seems like I started doing that ages ago. I kind of miss working with the Fae... and Prince...

I had my first day of school… Damnn also cannot believe that that happened this year. Seems like eons ago. I had a good first semester before all of the schools went online lol.

February - I met one of my guides - GG... That’s right! He came into my life when I was having a particularly hard time. GG stands for “Gentle Giant” an endearing, descriptive nickname that I’ve given him. He’s like a giant lumberjack, with insanely strong Autumn energy and vibes... like anytime I’m around him the visuals is all just golden forests

I got really sick... I do remember this. I was sick for a whole month straight - with what one of my professors dubbed “the cold from hell.” I don’t think I’ve ever been that sick before... it broke me lol and it took me months to recover practice-wise.

March - Because of being sick, this month was particularly uneventful. Oh also Covid happened lol

April - I started an herb garden... I made an herb garden in some mason jars!! It was a mixed-bag of success. It was mostly herb-dependent, some worked really well, others did not.

I opened up to my best-friend about my Path... Prior to this, literally no one in my life irl knew about anything going on with me spiritually. They didn’t even know I was spiritual; I was very closeted and careful. But this year, I actually opened up about it to pretty much everyone that I am close with; I’m grateful for that.

May - I met Skadi in a dream! I started having strangely lucid dreams where I was confronted and working with some strong female deity. I would discover later that it was the Norse Goddess of Winter, Skadi.

June - Speaking of which, I started working with Skadi! We made a contract, and I’ve been working with her ever since. I never thought that I’d be doing any deity work when I started out; it’s been interesting to say the least. I’m grateful for her patronage, and oversight.

Midsummer Celebration... I was invited by Prince to celebrate with him in the Fae Court. It was a wild experience - one I will never forget.

July - This month was insanely busy, so I will be succinct:

I took a trip home... along with that, I took my second homeopathic remedy. I was out of sorts mentally... this stabilized me, and I decided to be completely sober shortly thereafter (I only smoked pot recreationally)

At Skadi’s behest, I started learning runes...

I bought a massive crystal collection, and started working with them energetically...

I met Ca! She’s a Fae that is related to Prince; she will end up being a mentor of sorts for me later on, once I start doing Past Life work.

My discernment improved dramatically; things were fuzzy at best before this

I became a teacher at RAMA!

August - I began to have some past life experiences... I didn’t know what they were at the time, though.

September - I started school again... still online

There were massive wildfires here in Oregon...

I experimented with Astral Projection - I think I’ve come to the conclusion that Projection and Travel are the same thing

October - Autumn!

First time visiting The Cosmic Place and doing past-life stuff with Ca... this would dominate my practice for the next while.

I stopped working with Prince

November - I flew back home for the holidays... This month wasn’t too eventful spiritually, as I was very occupied with family and finishing up school.

December - Homeopathic Remedy #3... this was different than the other two, and its’ experience was beyond words. But I’ve definitely grown energetically, and I feel more stable emotionally.

The first time visiting The Temple in the astral... After my remedy, I began having new sets of experiences in the astral, The Temple being one of them. It is still currently dominating my attention at the moment.

The Vision... I’ve been having a vision for the past couple of years... and on the Solstice/Conjunction, my family took a spontaneous trip up to a cabin in the mountains, where it was fulfilled. Massive energy upgrade.

Very crazy! What a year! Despite how hard the year was, I really grew a lot, and I’m thankful for it. Also, reading through my old journal posts - I feel like I was so cocky lol. I feel like I’ve matured more as a person, too. I also feel much older than I was at the beginning of the year.

I am looking forward to what opportunities and lessons 2021 will bring.

That’s it for now.

Blessings!

[cwrp]

NAME: Casey Wells AGE: 29 DATE OF BIRTH: September 15th 1991 GENDER/PRONOUNS: She/Her HOMETOWN: London, England LENGHT OF RESIDENCY IN SAINT CLAIRE: 5 Years NEIGHBORHOOD: Downtown an Sol Pointe OCCUPATION: Assistant district attorney FACECLAIM: Dakota Johnson

QUOTE

“The most dangerous heart disease: strong memory”- Nizar Qabbani

BIOGRAPHY

TRIGGER WARNINGS: Suicide, death, homophobia, drug abuse, self harm

Casey Delilah Wells was born in London, England, to an American father and a british mother. She was one of three girls for most of her life and in a wealthy family she seemingly wanted for nothing. Her father was a hedge fund manger from Boston and his mother a Pediatric Doctor turned housewife after losing her fourth child when he was only six months to pneumonia. She couldn’t face treating other people’s children when her own hadn’t managed to pull through and this threw her into a deep depression.

She was supposedly dedicating her time to her three daughters Tatum (20) Casey (14), and Tallulah (6 - at the time), but she wasn’t really checked in. Casey saw her mother go from a strong woman to a husk of her former self and she could hardly bare it. When she was sixteen she insisted that she be sent back to the USA for boarding school. The school was a prestigious one that held a pristine reputation, but Casey Wells in her final year found herself on the wrong side of that reputation. It was the year of her exams to get into Harvard Law School, a dream she had had for years, when Casey found herself falling for another girl in her class. Falling hard. Chloe was like kryptonite to the wannabe lawyer, enticing her away from classes for elicit meetings in the back row of the library. Until one day they were caught. They were faced with two very cut and dry options, cease their relationship which the dean believed would sully the reputation of the school if it got out, or be expelled. Chloe had far more gumption than Casey, pushing for the two of them to fight back, but with the potential of the Ivy League on the horizon it wasn’t something the girl could face. Denying her own feelings she shunned Chloe for the rest of her final year at school, insisting since that day that she was straight as the day is long. It still causes her guilt when the thought passes her mind.

Finally she heard back that she had managed to get into her first choice university and attended Harvard Law until she was 24 getting the top education that money could buy. She wanted to get away from the pain that had encompassed her family as well as her now denied past relationship, but it didn’t work as she’d hoped it would. It was in her first year of collage that life began to fall apart drastically for Casey yet again. Her mother took a turn for the worst in a way that no one could save her from this time, no medical professional or member of her family, and it was the middle of one of her lectures when Casey was called with the news that Elizabeth Wells had taken her own life.

Casey hadn’t seen  her mother in a whole year, and the gap that her death left in her life she tried to fill with work, work and more work. Eventually succumbing to pills and other various study aids to keep her on top. She spiralled down into a deep depression that she became a pro at covering up with a tight smile and a smart quip, but the truth was the girl was never going to be the same again. She could hardly look at Tatum, her other sister, without seeing their mother since their features were so alike, and she strayed from her family even worse than she had before. She now hasn’t seen them in three years, and doesn’t really like talking about them at all. She looks perfect on the outside, but she is actually just a husk like her mother had become, searching for something to fulfil her and hoping if she worked hard enough it might be her job. Maybe if she hit on the right case she would be able to save someone else in the way she couldn’t save her own family. She was controlling of herself and controlling of the situations around her, to feel out of control was something that sent Casey into a tailspin. Often she would turn to alcohol, self harm, and prescription pills to drown memories and emotions in a drunken, drugged up haze, just to give her some kind of relief. She wanted to feel something, something strong and real. She is her own worst enemy.

Casey then found out she was pregnant by her now new husband Etienne almost four years ago. Shocked to say the least she decided to keep the baby, which they later found out was twin girls. Battling with her pregnancy as well as working a full time job Casey is run even more ragged than usual, she is supported by Etienne but everything is still causing her to run herself into the ground. So emotionally blocked off she only just admitted that he was her boyfriend, but slowly he is breaking down her emotional barrier which Casey finds terrifying. As of 2nd February 2020 Casey gave birth to two twin girls called Elizabeth and Ophelia. She has just returned to work as the ADA for the SVU unit of Saint Claire, her office in City Hall.

As for Etienne’s involvement in crime, the lawyer is aware of it, but that doesn’t mean she’s going to let anyone else know that. She has made it clear to Etienne that she will do everything in her power to protect him if push comes to shove, but none of his fellow members will be given the same luxury. If anything she will do everything in her power to bring them down in court. Not at all pleased that this is all going on, quite literally, in her back yard. Still, no one she works with is any the wiser. So far. The two of them live above Lux in the penthouse most of the time with their girls, escaping to Sol Pointe when they have the chance, wanting to spend family time on the beach for an occasionally more relaxed way of life.

[curlygirl84]

Twenty Years Ago...

It was my the second day of my senior year of high school. I had just returned from visiting a bunch of colleges in Washington, DC. I was wearing a black/silver shirt from the Hard Rock Cafe in DC. It was a gorgeous day; perfect blue sky and only a few small, fluffy clouds. I was in AP Spanish class when two of my classmates got called out of class. This was not unusual because they ran the school news station and knew how to work all of the electronic equipment in the school.

Suddenly, we were told to turn on the tvs. Our principal came on and told us that a plane had crashed into one of the World Trade Center towers. I remember being a little bit puzzled as to why he would tell us this, but I do live relatively close to NYC. We were allowed to keep the televisions on and it was switched to the news. A few minutes later, we watched the second plane hit the second tower. That was when we knew something was very much wrong and out of the ordinary. A little while later, the towers collapsed. I think that was one of the most gut wrenching, horrifying moments for me; I knew that all the people in the towers were gone and none of this was an accident. I remember our teacher, who was from Colombia, showing us pictures of soldiers stationed around public and government buildings. It was absolutely not what we wanted to see or talk about, but he was absolutely correct that more security and war were in our future.

I remember coming home from school that day and my mother was trying to contact friends in NYC. One of her friends is a doctor. Another is an author. They were both okay physically, but mentally and emotionally shaken to the core. In February 2002, I attended a conference for high school students in DC (Presidential Classroom). Someone involved in the conference had connections at the Pentagon. I was on the second tour of the Pentagon since that September; the group ahead of us was the first and were interviewed by the local news. It was a very quick tour; we had soldiers in front and in back of us; they kept our IDs until we left. There were some memorials in the halls; cards and pictures mostly. The hole in the wall looked like a regular construction site from the outside; you couldn't even tell from the inside.

Years later, we met the brother of one man who died in one of the towers. He holds a lot of anger and bitterness stemming from his sudden, unjust, tragic loss. At first it surprised me, but I realized that if anyone so much as looks at my little sister the wrong way, they will hear about it from me; I cannot imagine losing her in such a barbaric way. If you are religious, please pray for the families; it is always hard, but I imagine milestone anniversaries are worse.

The war in Afghanistan ended last month after twenty long years. I can only offer my apologies and condolences to the Afghan people; war has ravaged your country and I fear that your immediate future is bleak. I don't know what the answers are, but I do know that the country and its people deserve better than endless wars and brutal terrorist regimes.

I must also mention the American military personnel and our trusted allies from around the world. I know that you followed orders and did your best to fulfill the mission. I can only imagine how heartbreaking it must be to see all your hard work undone. Let's hope that this is not the end for Afghanistan; thank you for your service. I do believe that you made a positive impact; I think of the generation of girls who went to school and respite from the terrorist regime that you gave the country. Hopefully, we can all learn from this, defeat the terrorists, and somehow rebuild the country in a way that will last.

On this solemn anniversary, I hope that we can come together and remember the sense of true patriotism, the deep compassion, and the overwhelming kindness we felt towards one another and our nation. If we can stand strong in our hearts and minds, then the terrorists have lost; let us be defined not by the smoke from the New York towers or the Pennsylvanian field or the Pentagon, but by the love in our hearts that lead to countless kind deeds that day. "It was the worst day we have ever seen, but it brought out the best in us."--Senator John Kerry "If we learn nothing else from this tragedy, we learn that life is short and there is no time for hate."--Sandy Dahl, widow of Jason, the co-pilot of flight 93