#but the literature is so very underwhelming....

[jackredfieldwasmyjacob]

studying the 17th and 18th centuries the same day is such a whiplash cause wdym in the 17th century you have don quijote and la vida es sueño and quévedo and lope and meanwhile the most exciting work of literature from the 18th century is 'informe sobre la ley agraria' ('essay on the agrarian reform') by jovellanos

[unbizzarre]

One-Esk and Murderbot meet in the waiting lobby for Robo-Therapy

(…specifically rage counseling )

Probably two of my favorite robot/ai/construct protagonists in literature! Though I have a lot. (What’s up Culture shipminds…)

Creation notes:

A pattern I’ve been noticing is that a lot of these robots are very traumatized, very angry, and don’t like talking about their feelings. I was gonna originally make this short comic about One-Esk (aka Breq) and Murderbot on the first day of group therapy for rage counseling and it would just be a bunch of shots of them sitting in silence cuz neither of them like talking about their feelings but, uh…. the shots were just a lot and the series of events wasn’t really flowing right so I scrapped that idea in favor of not having to draw a zillion backgrounds. Still wound up taking a stupidly long time to create a product that feels… underwhelming. I really like how Breq turned out but I just couldn’t get the hair or costume design on MB to really fit the corpo-futuristic spacer asthetic I was going for, while still capturing that social-anxiety-comfort-hoodie energy. (Was originally contemplating having a shot of MB pulling hoodie strings closed over their face in one shot but wound up scrapping that idea as well.) Cannonicallly, MB should probably be in all dark blues and blacks, but the colors just weren’t working so I went with yellow instead. Idk. Maybe it’s a loaner hoodie from one of MB’s humans.

Here’s a shot I never wound up using:

Anyways! I hope this made you smile if you like one or both of these series! 😊

Post script: if you like Martha Wells Murderbot Diaries, you should definitely check out Ann Leckie’s Ancillary Justice trilogy, or vice versa. More angry traumatized non-binary human-ai constructs for all! Mega-latestage-capitolist dystopia, or xenophobic -imperialist-socialist empire? Sentient space ships? C’mon. Just read both series u know you’ll love it.

[laroserie]

— characters : my oc's - separate ! ( yandere!incubus - yandere!omega - yandere!high noble fae - yandere!piercer )

— content : x gender neutral reader - spending christmas with them, typical holiday fluff, the yandere-ness isn't really here ( expect for yan!omega )

— authors note : ... i haven't posted the introduction post for my yandere piercer but ! it's okay :) also ! this was supposed to be a lil bonus but writers block is kicking my ass so you get this

• yandere! incubus

Before you he wasn't exactly big on doing christmas at home - he used to go out in bars and picked people up to go have 'fun' in the bathroom of the said bars.

After you came into his life, and he kidnapped you, he obviously stopped doing that and finally saw the perspective that christmas was a holiday to spent with thoses that are dear to you. And well, you were more than dear to him.

He will set up and decorate the christmas tree with you - he prefer for it to be neat so he may fix up what you put up when you aren't in the room.

In term of christmas eve, unless you are a good cook - you both are eating a regular take out for it, but he will purchase a yule log though !

And for christmas in itself, he will buy you a gift - you most likely will know what it is in advance because he isn't exactly discrete when asking what 'you could eventually want but it's only hypothetical and totally not for christmas'.

On the 25th of december, he will wake you up very early, like 6am. He will act surprised and happy whatever you gift him. Will jump into your arms and kiss you. And you better act surprised and happy at this gift too if you don't want him to be all grumpy.

• yandere! omega

Asper most likely forces you two to spent christmas like a 'regular' couple - except for the all hanging out outside and looking at the decorations or going to a christmas market. It maybe a holiday season but he cannot afford any risks or you leaving him.

He will try his best though. He will decorate the entire house to be christmas themed - in the hope that he may win a few points with you, after all yes. He may be holding you captive but hey, at least he made the house cute, he deserves something for that right ?

He'll try to make you forget for a moment your current situation - he is delusional enough to think that him trying to give you a sense of normalcy ( which he do mostly for himself ) may make you like him more - or forgive him a bit for kidnapping you.

He's the type to cook an entire christmas dinner and force feed you it - he will buy oysters force them down your throat, he will cook scallops and cut them in smalls bits and make you eat them while you are tied up to a chair, with red ropes, obviously.

• yandere! high noble fae

Christmas is not really a thing for faes, they have somewhat similar holiday, mostly focused around gift giving and spending time with your family but it happen during the summer and is quite underwhelming compared to christmas.

Realistically they already knew about christmas but they couldn't bring it first, they could wait for you to bring it up. But they already have prepared a few things like a gift for you and a small tree, it's in one of their closet which they forbade you from cleaning since you started working as a servant.

Once you bring up christmas, they laugh at your face and tell you something along the line of 'Do you really think, I could celebrate a silly human holiday ? How do you take me for ?' but it will be quickly followed by a 'Well, if you beg well enough I may indulge you.". Even if you don't beg, they will be very much in on celebrating christmas.

With only the two of you of course ! They refuses to get anyone else involved - with the exceptions of their family cook which they will give the tasks of cooking.

They use this as an occasions to make a ginger bread house, they saw various things about it while reading human literature and they always wanted to try so they will act as if they only did it for you. ( The house ended up breaking after 30 seconds and the kitchen they borrowed was such a mess, cleaning up was awful and they regret their idea - they still check it out of their list of thing to do. )

• yandere! piercer

Thomas was never big on christmas and it doesn't change with you - if you really insist in it he will try his best to be enthusiastic about it but don't expect too much from him.

He won't even help you decorate or anything - at most he will get you a gift for christmas that he won't brother wrapping up and will accompany you at a christmas market solely for the food, and because he does find it cute and romantic to walk around with you in the snow.

[a-modernmajorgeneral]

At the ancient Olympics in Greece, athletes weren’t the only stars of the show. The spectacle also attracted poets, who recited their works for eager audiences. Competitors commissioned bigger names to write odes of their victories, which choruses performed at elaborate celebrations. Physical strength and literary prowess were inextricably linked.

Thousands of years later, this image appealed to Pierre de Coubertin, a French baron best known as the founder of the modern Olympics in 1896. But today’s Games bear little resemblance to Coubertin’s grand vision: He pictured a competition that would “reunite in the bonds of legitimate wedlock a long-divorced couple—muscle and mind.”

The baron believed that humanity had “lost all sense of eurythmy,” a word he used to describe the harmony of arts and athletics. The idea can be traced back to sources such as Plato’s Republic, in which Socrates extolls the virtues of education that combines “gymnastic for the body and music for the soul.” Poets should become athletes, and athletes should try their hand at verse.

That philosophy was a driving force at the 1912 Stockholm Games, where organizers introduced five arts competitions as official Olympic events. Modern history’s first written work to win an Olympic gold medal was “Ode to Sport,” a prose poem by Georges Hohrod and M. Eschbach. It begins:

O Sport, delight of the Gods, distillation of life! In the grey dingle of modern existence, restless with barren toil, you suddenly appeared like the shining messenger of vanished ages, those ages when humanity could smile.

Over the following eight verses, the poets sing Sport’s praises. “O Sport, you are Honor! The titles you bestow are worthless save if won in absolute fairness. … O Sport, you are Joy! At your call the flesh makes holiday and the eyes smile. … O Sport, you are Fecundity! … O Sport, you are Progress!” And so on.

Today’s readers are often underwhelmed by the first poem to win gold, describing it as “florid,” “saccharine” or “overblown.” But as far as the 1912 jury was concerned, Hohrod and Eschbach knocked it out of the park.

“The great merit of the ‘Ode to Sport,’ which, in our view, was far and away the winner in the literature competition, was that it is the very model of what the competitions [were] looking for in terms of inspiration,” wrote the jurors in their report.

It’s perhaps unsurprising that Hohrod and Eschbach understood the spirit of the competition, the fabled marriage of muscle and mind, so acutely. That’s because they were pseudonyms for the man who had conceived the whole idea: The author of “Ode to Sport” was none other than Coubertin himself.

The first major excavations at Olympia, the Greek sanctuary that hosted the ancient Games, began in the 1870s. While previous digs had revealed ruins around the Temple of Zeus, the large-scale efforts that followed uncovered sprawling structures and thousands of artifacts.

At the time, Coubertin was a teenager living in France. He had already seen the ruins of ancient Rome on family trips as a young boy, and now he was hearing all about the excavations at Olympia. He had recently started attending a Jesuit school, which provided him with a classical education and strengthened his burgeoning interest in ancient Greece.

“[Coubertin] was raised and educated classically, and he was particularly impressed with the idea of what it meant to be a true Olympian—someone who was not only athletic, but skilled in music and literature,” Richard Stanton, author of The Forgotten Olympic Art Competitions, told Smithsonian magazine in 2012. “He felt that in order to recreate the events in modern times, it would be incomplete to not include some aspect of the arts.”

The baron’s fellow organizers never fully shared his vision. After a few false starts, Coubertin formed the International Olympic Committee (IOC) in 1894, and the first modern Olympics took place in Athens two years later. But the inaugural 1896 Games included only athletic competitions, such as the discus throw, swimming, fencing and pole vaulting. Several new events debuted in 1900 (among them water polo and archery) and 1904 (boxing and lacrosse), but muscle and mind remained firmly at odds.

Coubertin pressed on. When officials announced that Rome would host the 1908 Olympics, the ancient city’s selection evidently set the baron’s gears churning. On August 5, 1904, he published an article titled “The Roman Olympiad” on the front page of the French newspaper Le Figaro, writing:

The time has come to enter a new phase, and to restore the Olympiads to their original beauty. At the time of Olympia’s splendor … the arts and literature joined with sport to ensure the greatness of the Olympic Games. The same must be true in the future. … Let the Romans now give us such a typical Olympiad and reopen the temple of sport to the ancient companions of its glory.

Coubertin argued that the partnership of sport and art had “outlasted the destruction of Olympia,” and the time had come to “restore this ideal completely.” Now that the first three modern Games had gotten the ball rolling, it was “possible and desirable to bring muscles and thought together again.”

Two years later, the IOC held a conference to seriously consider “to what extent and in what form the arts and literature can participate in the celebration of the modern Olympiads.” The event program listed several arts categories that were under consideration. Under “literature” were two bullet points: “possibility of setting up Olympic literary competitions; conditions for these competitions” and “sporting emotion, source of inspiration for the man of letters.”

Coubertin gave a rousing opening speech, doubling down on the metaphor of muscle and mind’s remarriage. “I would verge on being untruthful if I said that ardent desire compels them to renew their conjugal life today,” he said. “Doubtless their cooperation was long and fruitful, but once separated by adverse circumstances, they had come to a point of complete mutual incomprehension. Absence had made them grow forgetful.”

Officials ultimately agreed to add five arts competitions to the upcoming Olympics in 1908: literature, painting, sculpture, music and architecture. All works entered into these categories, collectively named the Pentathlon of the Muses, would need to be inspired by sports, restoring the ancient harmony that Coubertin had envisioned.

[retrieve-the-kraken]

So I finally read "Red, White and Royal Blue" by Casey McQuiston, and although it's not the greatest piece of literature ever written (I mean, I wasn't really expecting it to be), and it's very flawed, it was fun and funny and I might reread it. Also it's a rom-com, and I'm very selective about rom-coms, but this one passes.

Then I watched the movie, and it was underwhelming, for obvious reasons. I mean, of course the book was better because it usually is; and although I liked the pacing at first, after the halfway point it careened off like a shopping cart with a crazy wheel going downhill. And the omission of certain plot points and characters was very odd, and even Stephen Fry was underwhelming (I didn't think that was possible).

Buuuuuut... my god, it was worth watching just for the chemistry between Taylor Zakhar Perez and Nicholas Galitzine. There are some bantering moments in there that had me squealing into a cushion like a giddy teenager. And the Paris scene? Beautiful. All the heart-to-heart moment were lovely. They don't make rom-coms like this anymore...

Also worth watching for Taylor Zakhar Perez himself, and I'm distraught that his eyelashes didn't get their own line in the credits. Also Shaan Srivastava, who got an unfairly tiny amount of screen time for someone that handsome. Same for Nora, who was adorable and underused.

My favorite moments: Zahar's panic attack in the hotel room, Zahar's call to Shaan, Zahar's pillow attack... Basically Zahar in general. Also David. Also Amy.

OH AND THE CAKE SCENE! THAT WAS SO GOOD! VERY WELL EXECUTED. TEN POINTS.

Most heart-wrenching moment: any moment when Nicholas Galitzine looked tortured, but especially that whole pier scene.

Weirdest change: Miguel. Who the fuck decided that... Also I'm sad that the "History, huh?" quote didn't make it onto the emails and therefore didn't make it onto t-shirts either...

Anyway, it was still worth a read and a watch.

[betterbooktitles]

RIP Paul Auster. Here's a short piece about a time he came into my bookstore:

For a while, I've been hearing a lot of chatter about my first humor book How Not to Read: Harnessing the Power of a Literature-Free Life. No, I don't mean that I've been reading book reviews on Goodreads or the twisted rantings of my internet stalker. I've been hearing the hype (or underwhelmed sighs) about my book firsthand. I've been listening to customers from my semi-incognito perch behind the counter of an independent bookstore.

To all writers who want to know what people really think about their work, I can't recommend working as an incognito author-bookseller enough.

With a title like How Not to Read, I expected some vitriol from customers who misunderstood the concept. I thought 18 to 35-year-olds would especially love it but for a generation defined by its penchant for irony, we sure do know how to not take a joke. For the most part, people much younger than I am are the ones most offended. I hear little children with pained, screechy voices asking their mothers: "Why would someone write this?" to which the mothers reply "I don't know sweetie," as if informing the kids about death for the first time. Another favorite is hearing a sixteen-year-old say "who would do this?" over and over with the type of outrage reserved only for political candidates who claim Barack Obama wasn't born in the United States. The answer is "I would" but I keep it to myself. I want to see how far it goes. I keep waiting for someone to impulsively tear the book to shreds. That's how mad some people sound.

But most people who read a lot, get it. They come into the store, they laugh at the cover, the very concept of a guide to helping people read less is funny! It tickles them. They flip through the book and laugh and laugh and laugh, then put the book down and promptly leave the store without buying it.

"Wait!" I yell, "What didn't sell you on this book?" (I'm careful not to reveal who I am at these moments).

"Well," the person responds, "I'm just not in the mood to laugh right now." Not in the mood… to laugh? I wouldn't want to see this person at a restaurant: the waiter comes to the table and says "How were your appetizers?" and this person responds: "you know, food just isn't my thing…" I thought everyone was in the mood to laugh, but this was one of my many misconceptions about readers before working in a bookstore.

I've been working in this store for about a year, during which time I've spent countless hours talking about my own book, trying my hardest not to tell every person who enters the store that I wrote it lest I lose my ability to observe the impartial reaction of customers. Tip to published writers, though: if you can hand your own book to a customer and say "this is my book and you should buy it," people usually do. Most of the time they buy the book because they're excited to tell people they've met you, and sometimes they buy the book because you made it very awkward for them to leave the store without doing so. Keep eye-contact. Don't show fear. Always be closing.

Deciding when and when not to be the incognito author has many humbling benefits. Though the big lesson it teaches you most first-time authors are already know: the number one review of your book won't be a petulant rant. Your number one review will be silence. People will walk in, they'll read ten pages of your book, and without so much as an indecisive "hmm" they will disregard your book forever. As Oscar Wilde said: “There is only one thing worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.” I'll take the petulant rant any day over nothing.

At the risk of this essay becoming like If on a winter’s night a traveler, the more I sell my book in secret, the more my real life mimics a Paul Auster-y meta-literary detective novel where I keep spying on people to figure out who will like the author (me) the most. It keeps getting weirder and weirder. People who have read the book now come in quoting a particular joke they didn’t like, then stand staring at me without laughing. I laugh uncomfortably to break the tension, but they refuse to crack a smile. Sometimes, I picture the future author version of me walking into the store while Current Dan is working as a bookseller. I see Future Me looking at the book nostalgically and saying “eh, this wasn’t my best!” then leaving me behind the counter alone to cope with what just happened.

The closest story I have to this Auster-esque fantasy is when the real-life Paul Auster came into the store the day of the book’s release. He leaned on the counter, aviators still on, and said: "How Not to Read, huh?" He was laughing! Laughing at the very idea of my book’s existence. Paul Auster gets it.

I took a sharp breath in. The owners of the store were so excited about my book that they gave me the entire front window for a day to promote the book. The same bright red cover in 8 by 8 rows and columns. I was suddenly embarrassed that I had published a book at all, and frightened that my literary hero might actually page through it in front of me. 

Then I remembered I had something to tell him.

“Paul!” I watched as he took off his sunglasses. I had his full attention. “I originally had a section in this book that parodied the New York Trilogy, and you yourself were in it," I said excitedly. Then, before I could stop myself, I saw the words pour out of my mouth while my brain screamed ‘DAN. Don’t!’ I let this out:

“The editor suggested we cut it because no one would get the reference."

I watched Paul grimace. He pushed himself off the counter and put his aviators back on. “And that's why you never listen to editors!" he announced before abruptly walking out the door.

If I have any advice for a writer, it is this: spend ten years as an editor for other people while you work on your own stuff. You’ll get used to looking at words on paper as malleable and in need of repair. Maybe after a decade of cold perusals through the work of a stranger, you'll be able to whittle down your own work into a readable form. After that, spend another decade selling your published books in person at an indie bookstore. Twenty years in, you won't take anything personally. You'll be so used to rejection and snide comments, you’ll be impervious to criticism.

My only other advice is if you meet your hero during any stage of your literary development, don’t tell him he was cut from your book because he isn’t famous enough.

Subscribe for more fun pieces about bookselling and the like!

[cbk1000]

So, if you don’t mind, why would you not let anyone IRL read your fanfic? Obviously it is really good writing, so is it the subject matter then? Based on your other posts here, it doesn't seem like you are someone who would fear judgement for that? Or is it different IRL? (I understand not letting your mom or dad read the porn though, lol).

No, I wouldn't let my parents read the porn. Lol My parents are also both very homophobic, so even if I didn't mind people IRL reading my work, I'd just keep it from them full stop, because even if I gave them the sanitized version of something with the sex scenes cut out, they'd think it was disgusting because two men are in love.

It's not the subject matter; I just find the thought of anyone I know IRL, and regularly have to look in the eyes, reading my writing to be incredibly cringe. I'd let my sister, a fellow writer, read it if she really wanted to, but she would not be allowed to do it in front of me, and she would also not be allowed to talk about it afterward. Lmao

It's not shame about fandom, or subject matter; I've read plenty of off-the-wall stuff and happily terrorize the people who know me by talking about it. "Jenn writes and reads gay fanfic" would probably be one of the least surprising things my friends and family could learn about me. It's my writing specifically that I don't want them getting hold of, because I find the idea embarrassing. I do not, tbh, think it's that good; obviously I enjoy doing it, or I wouldn't have written close to a million words in the last few years, and I take joy in it, and there are lines or scenes I think are well-done, but I don't think readers really understand how I and my Imposter Syndrome perceive my writing. I don't think it's the worst thing in the world, because I have read some really REALLY terrible writing, but I do think it's kind of just mediocre and underwhelming overall, so I think really the motivation for not wanting anyone IRL to see it is that I would find it embarrassing for friends and family to find out I'm really not that great at a hobby they've seen me put so much time and effort into.

It's different with internet strangers, who don't see the alarming volume of medieval history and Arthurian literature I've collected to help with world building, or how many times a week, and for how long, I disappear into my room to write. I also don't have to live in the same house as them after they read my writing. And, too, my specific audience is full of fanfic readers, who are judging it as fanfic, and who are comparing it to other fanfic, a genre that has absolutely no quality control, and where just spell checking your work puts you ahead of a lot of the pack. It's being judged, by fanfic readers, on its merits as fanfic, and it's being compared to other fanfiction. Of course it looks good and polished under those circumstances; a lot of fanfiction is written by people who haven't even been alive as long as I've been writing. But most of the people in my life are not fanfic readers, and would be judging my writing against the actual books they've read. So I guess what I really worry about is when it breaks containment, and has to be judged on its own, just as a piece of writing, and not as fanfiction being compared to a lot of works written by inexperienced authors, it'll be obvious that it's not very good. Even as fanfic, if you were to compare my work fairly, to writers of a similar age (30s) who have been writing for decades, it doesn't really stand out. A lot of writers of that age and experience level are far more educated than me, and, even as hobbyists, often have actual degrees, or at least some kind of credentials, in creative writing or literature. Whereas I am just someone who reads a lot of books and loves to tell stories, and I think that's fairly obvious when you compare my work to people who actually have formal education or training in writing.

[vlindervin7]

two books i’ve been wanting to read for a very long time, with very different results. didn’t finish babel and loveddd young mungo. not that anyone asked but let me write down a quick little review

- young mungo: LOVED IT. heartbreaking and heartwarming at the same time like my heart was just going through it. written with so much humour and tenderness and compassion, while also never shying away from the harsh realities of the lives depicted. i thought the main character was written with a lot of subtlety and i enjoyed being in his head so much. and this might be a bit controversial (possibly? idk) but i really liked that even some of the antagonists weren’t put into the antagonist’s role entirely, but were also offered empathy and were shown to have other, less violent sides (not all the antagonists though, let me be clear. i’m very much talking abt the hamish category and not the the two Actual villains (no spoilers)). without romanticising or downplaying the bad, still there was good found in it which i thought was just very well-done. anyway. do check the trigger warnings please

- babel: i’m a little sad bc i’ve been looking forward to reading this literally ever since i heard abt it which was before it was even released but… it just didn’t keep my attention. it’s not that i disliked it bc i didn’t and i actually really really really (really!) enjoy the translation elements and the world building off of it. i think that part’s great. it’s interesting, well-researched, unique!! and paired with the footnotes it’s unlike any book i’ve read before. the author took the term dark academia and went all in and i really do admire that. however i think the problem for me is the writing. the prose isn’t bad, but to me it read a bit like ya. and yk i don’t think ya is a lesser genre, i think it serves its purpose really well, but it has this tendency of explaining every little thing and also to take on a sort of moralising function, which is fine for children’s literature, but once you grow out of it it gets kinda tiring. and that’s the issue i had with babel, that some things were a bit over-explained to the point where i didn’t think the message and themes were that interesting anymore because they were just so clearly spelled out to me constantly and were sometimes lacking some nuance. i didn’t really feel connected to the characters either sadly. and this is all very disappointing to me bc i would’ve loved to read more on the translations, so i’m not saying i’ll never finish it but for right now it was just too long for smth that lost my attention the more i read. and now i’m realising the things i didn’t like abt this book are also the things that made yellowface a bit underwhelming to me

[nyaerysfics]

The King’s Heartstring - I

Being the King’s niece came with benefits.

Rhaenyra got what she wanted, when she wanted it, and she always got the best of the best. She was gifted the finest silks, jewels and wines from lords and their sons vying for her hand.

None touched gifts from the King, however.

He’d gifted her rare Valyrian steel and fancy cut jewels only Valyrian jewelry makers could have produced (Westerosi jewels were so… underwhelming. Thank the gods his family brought over a lot of jewels before the Doom). He gave her spools and spools, varying in color of pure Myrish lace to be used in dresses made by the seamstress he paid.

He gave her multiple dragonbone corsets, ones that made her figure look the best at court. He imported rich oils for her hair and skin and fragrant ones that lingered in the air as she walked by.

He’d built Rhaenyra her own personal library, full of books solely in High Valyrian. She’d complained once that she hated reading books in common, the language was so bland and ugly. His Grace sent far and wide for all kinds of books in their mother tongue.

From poetry, to literature, to science, to history, to battle strategy, she read every single book, seventy-four of them by the time she was five and ten. She hadn’t wanted her kepa to think her unappreciative.

Rhaenyra’s father never liked it, the nature of their close relationship and when Aemma died and he married Otto’s whelp of a daughter, she didn’t either. She complained that it was unseemly, ungodly to lavish the girl in such treasures.

“It is as if he means to court her! This is far too much, Viserys! She must return this, this instance,” she cried looking at the large diamond and pearl ring that once belonged to Queen Rhaenys. “He does not even gift his own wife such things! Not once have I seen her with jewels she did not get from her father’s house!”

Alicent had been right of course, Laena had never received a single gift from the King, not even so much as a freshly picked flower. He’d figured Queenship was gift enough.

Plus, her father had openly bragged time and time again of his great wealth. If she wanted something, she’d better ask him.

Rhaenyra had refused to give the ring back, and out of defiance, had placed the ring on the fourth digit of her hand, the one meant to house her wedding ring.

No harm or punishment would ever come to her though, not with the King there. Or so she thought.

As it turns out, there are things even Daemon could not protect her from.

Her stunt with the ring inspired her stepmother, and she quickly began looking for a husband for the girl. Alicent consulted Otto, of course, to figure out what would be best for them, and ultimately decided on Lord Jason Lannister.

“Her dowry will pay the way for this family for years if the insolent girl can play her part correctly,” Otto had spat. “It is time she starts contributing to the family instead of complaining all the time. Perhaps with her out of the way we can advance our plan to have Aegon named as heir.”

Alicent had wholeheartedly agreed.

“No way! Father, tell her no! I am not marrying that Lannister fuck!”

“Watch your mouth, Rhaenyra! My father and I have worked hard to find you a match worthy of your station. He has a good seat and his family is very wealthy. Wealthy enough to spoil you with gifts like your dear uncle has, mind you. You will be happy there.”

Rhaenyra didn’t want to hear that, though.

“Father! Will you let her do this? She means to send me away because she’s jealous! She always has been. She and her ambitious fool of a father want to pawn me off to some lord they’re in cahoots with to be bred like some mare. I won’t have it!”

“Rhaenyra, please,” her father pleaded, his voice tired. “Alicent wants only what is best for you, my dear girl. You are just too young to see that. You are five and ten and due to be wed. Jason Lannister is a good match, and your sons will inherit a great seat. In time you will see the beauty of the match. You will love your husband and children. I’ve always thought you would be a great mother.”

That did nothing to appease his daughter.

“The King will not allow this,” Rhaenyra seethed, disgusted with her weak dunce of a father. “Jason Lannister is a pompous ass, one undeserving to lick the sole of my foot! And you’d have me marry him? Why? How much dowry did the Lannister’s offer you, huh?! How much does your father get off the top?!” She was full on screaming at her stepmother, so much so that her Kingsguard, Ser Erryk, popped his head in to assure the safety of his charge.

“Stop this at once! You will marry Jason Lannister and it will be in less than eight moons time. He has even commenced the building of a Dragonpit at Casterly Rock. Isn’t that sweet, Rhaenyra? Most men would not go to such measures for their betrothed. I think you could love him, stepdaughter, if you wanted to. With age you will learn that love is worked for and earned, not made upon first sight like some poetry book.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?! I am not some mere lady of the realm, someone like you! I am a Targaryen Princess and I have been since the moment I was born. That is what makes me different from you, from your half-blood daughter. You had to marry into power. I was born with it. I don’t care what you think, I will not marry him. The King will not let it be so. You know you will have to bring this to him? Right? Have you forgotten I am a Princess and my marriage is a matter of the crown?”

Viserys and his wife shared a dark look. Rhaenyra just cackled.

“You had forgotten, hadn’t you?” She smirked at the two idiots.

“It matters not, Rhaenyra.” She could tell even he didn’t believe that. “My brother, the King is a reasonable man and he too shall see that Lord Lannister is a fine match, the best one available.”

The Princess huffed, “We shall see.”

•

Jason Lannister tried and tried to connect with the Princess, to no avail.

She declined audiences with him and returned the gifts he sent her. Why would she want Lannister gold when she had Valyrian steel, gifted to her by the King himself? She had no need for any of his tacky shit, she would not be his wife.

So she publicly rebuffed his advances. She declined one walk in the garden, three invitations to supper and one dance at a feast her uncle had thrown in honor of his late parents wedding anniversary.

He’d seen, the King did. Rhaenyra had looked so disgusted with the Lord of Casterly Rock, and she hadn’t even voiced her dismissal, just simply waved her elegant hand and turned him away.

She’d quickly retired after that (after a sweet peck on the King’s cheek and bow to His Grace) and readied for bed. She couldn’t stand being in the same room as Alicent and Otto and their stupid glances. Fuck!

So the King summoned her, to break her fast the next morn. He’d had the kitchen prepare all of his nieces favorite foods and sat at his dining table waiting for her to arrive. It took less time than he thought it would, Rhaenyra loved to take her time. “The Valyrian Freehold wasn’t built in a day, my King,” she’d oft say.

She was announced and walked in wearing a gorgeous red silk gown, littered with rubies her uncle had provided. Her hair was flowing down her back, full and with a beautiful sheen. On her ears, neck, and fingers were all gifts the King had bestowed upon her. She looked like wealth.

“Good morrow, Your Grace. I was told you wished to speak to me? Hopefully I haven’t done anything to cause to be cross with me.”

He nods, a smile only she could pull out of him dancing on his lips. “Of course I’m not cross with you. I never need an excuse to want to see you, my love. Now sit.”

He went and grabbed her plate and began piling all of her favorites onto it. He served her fried eggs, slices of bacon, roasted potatoes, mushrooms, and scones. He had a selection of jams there for her as well. She loved her sweets, he knew.

“Thank you, kepa. You didn’t have to,” she said as she watched him make his own plate, the same things, just bigger portions.

“Nonsense, Princess. Eat,” he said before filling her chalice with sweet raspberry wine. “I haven't had much time to speak to you lately. It seems like the realm falls apart the moment I take some time for myself. I am so sorry for that. Perhaps we can start breaking our fasts together?”

She broke apart her eggs, the yokes spilling out onto her potatoes. With a mouth full of smashed bacon, she smiled. “I would love that, my King. I have missed you, greatly. Caraxes as well. How is he? Syrax always calls for him when we go on a flight.”

This is why he loved her, his sweet girl. “He is swell, Rhaenyra. I took him for a ride not two days ago. Tomorrow, mayhaps, we can go for a ride to Dragonstone and back.”

She nodded enthusiastically, her knife swiping her scone full of jam.

“How have you been?” Her King asked.

“I am alright, kepa. Father and Alicent are insufferable, as always. But other than that, I am okay.”

Daemon just frowned, “Do not pay any mind to Alicent, she is jealous of you, my girl. She is still cross I will not give those Andal shits she pushed out her worthless cunt titles or named that disgrace she birthed heir. The bitch is delusional.” He rolled his eyes. “You are my niece, the Princess and you should be more than fine. Tell me what bothers you and I will make it disappear.”

But Rhaenyra just shook her head. “Alicent and my father have arranged a match for me. They plan to sell me off to Jason Lannister for fifty golden dragons! Is that all I’m worth?”

”You know you aren’t.”

“They mean to ask for an audience with you in a few days to speak about it.”

“And this match doesn’t please you?”

Rhaenyra almost wanted to scream. “No! He is creepy and unfit for a woman of my station. Father and his wife keep telling me he is the best match I will get. If that is true, send me to the Silent Sisters, I beg you.”

“Hush now, no need for all of that. Why haven’t you come to me?”

“Father forbade me to speak on it!”

“You can always speak to me, no matter the topic. I will take care of this problem for you. Don’t worry.”

This time her eyes watered, “That is the problem. Eventually I will have to marry and I will be sent away, sent from you! The childbed is an unavoidable fate and some fat Andal lord will send me there, I will be made to squeeze out heirs, with no regard for my health. It is the burden of being a woman.”

The King shakes his head.

“You are no mere woman, Rhaenyra. You are a Targaryen. Remember that.”

-

Three days later Viserys and Alicent came to him.

“Brother, thank you for receiving Alicent and I. We come with good news, Your Grace. As you well know, Rhaenyra has been old enough to wed for quite some time.”

The elder quirks a brow, “Has she been? She is but five and ten. Some would say she is still too young.”

“She flowered at one and ten. She has ripened for four years! That is time enough. It’s time she does her duty to this house. Alicent was kind enough to arrange a match with Jason Lannister, with a dowry of fifty thousand gold dragons. Quite a match, huh?”

“Quite the match indeed. And how does Rhaenyra feel about the match?”

The look the two swapped would have told him all he needed to know, if he hadn't already.

“She is resistant, but so is the exuberance of youth. I’m sure in time she would love her husband and children,” Alicent spoke for the first time. “The marriage would provide her wealth, security and a seat for her son to inherit. It is a fine match, Your Grace.”

Gods, he thought. Her voice is fucking annoying.

“Wealth, security, and a great seat. What of love? Or my niece’s happiness? Has no thought of that? Viserys?”

“Us women are-,” she tried.

“Do not think to compare yourself to my niece, Alicent. You two are in no way the same. She doesn’t have to marry some man for wealth, she has that. Abundantly. She doesn’t need to marry for security, she is the most cherished maid in all of the known world, she is secure. And a seat? As you know, I have no children of my own. Her son could very well be my heir,” His Grace growled. “So again, why has no one thought of her happiness? I demand an answer.”

“Daemon. You know as well as I do, Princesses are not oft granted matches for love. It is usually a political match. She has not shown interest in looking for a husband so it has to be done for her. She will be well taken care of by Lord Lannister.”

“She is not just any Princess,” he told his younger brother.

After that, he’d dismissed the two and told him he’d inform them of his decision when he came to one.

-

King Daemon I Targaryen, in truth, was a simple man. He liked good, well aged Dornish strongwine and wouldn’t say no to a hot, wet mouth on his cock, either.

He was a good king, fair and just, exactly as Baelon the Brave and his mother, Alyssa, had raised him.

He was a conqueror, the first to add to their new empire since the original three-headed dragon, after winning the Stepstones in the first decade after his ascension. It took him six years (and 40,000 men) but he’d done it, and been named King of the Narrow Sea.

Almost immediately he’d broken ground on Bloodstone, to build Bloodstone. A gorgeous keep to pass down to his future son. He’d hoped.

Men thought him alike to Aegon, but he felt more like Visenya, and not just because he wielded her sword. Daemon was the elder and could also could be described as harsh, unforgiving or austere. There was nothing wrong with that. That is how you stay alive.

There was a reason Visenya outlived her siblings.

Daemon was comfortable in luxury, or in the trenches of war. He knew Visenya was too. If only her bloodline had survived, he thought. I’d be unstoppable.

And so, he felt like he related to her.

Visenya, like Aegon, married once for duty and once for love. Why couldn’t Daemon? Was he not King of the Seven Kingdoms as much as they were? He did not answer to the likes of men, he was a Targaryen, for gods sake.

Was he truly destined to be stuck in a dull marriage to Laena for the rest of his days? That couldn’t be so. Flames have mercy, he wouldn’t let it be so.

He deserved to spread his seed, to watch his sons grow in their mother. It was his birthright, but of course he was burdened with a barren wife.

Whispers followed him, “He is Maegor come again, even unable to get his seed to quicken. The gods speak, the gods know.”

It was bullshit.

It was definitely Laena’s fault, two dead (pregnant) whores can attest to that.

He was sick of bedding her. She was dull and meek, nothing like a true dragon. She had no fire, only still water.

After nine and ten years of marriage, and no heirs, he was done. Done with the ridicule and whispers of the lickspittles that populated his court. He had two seats to pass down, and no one to pass them to! He refused to give them to Viserys' sons, Aegon and Aemond. Absolutely no way.

He would marry for love too. He had made up his mind about that when Rhaenyra was ten. He knew if he made the right investments, the return would be astronomical. So he waited, and patiently watered his precious flower until she was ready to be plucked.

He lavished her with gifts, of all kinds. Anything to get her to smile.

She was the picture of Valyrian beauty, the youngest dragonlord of their family history, she was destined to be his. He was patient.

When her mother died, and Viserys was too caught up in grief, he, the King himself, cared for his dear niece. That brought the two together even more.

When Viserys decided to knock up her serving girl and asked to marry her, Daemon was overjoyed. He couldn’t agree fast enough.

Not even the existence of a Targaryen bastard in that whores belly couldn’t dampen the elation he felt. Viserys would push her straight into his arms with his haphazard treatment of the girl.

It worked too. She’d downright hated Alicent. It had been amusing to watch Viserys try and hold his household together. Rhaenyra was not going along with the happy family narrative Viserys tried to create.

It got even worse after their first child, Aegon, was born. Viserys didn’t see Rhaenyra for moons at a time, at that point. She much preferred to spend time Daemon, and he welcomed her with open arms. Viserys moved back to the Red Keep just to see his daughter, even though Alicent and Rhaenyra objected.

Dragonstone was damp and dull, but Daemon wasn’t there, and that was something to Alicent.

Alicent spit out two more children, Helaena and Aemond in quick succession after that. Daemon truly appreciated their efforts to push Rhaenyra into his arms.

He wasn’t stupid, the King. He knew that Alicent would start offering his sweet girl up to the lords of the realm at one point, but he didn’t think it would be so soon. Don’t get him wrong, his niece was beautiful and got his cock harder faster than anyone, ever had. Her figure was slim, but Daemon would spread her out in time. She had what looked like perfect handfuls for breasts and he just couldn’t wait.

But he’d been prepared to wait, for at least one more turn of the sun. Six and ten was not too young to be full of life, not when some girls were wed at one and ten.

Honestly, the anticipation was killing him. He would still have to wait, after the announcement. A wedding would need to be planned and had before he could bed his wife, and get her fat with his babe. He bristled at the thought. She was his already, he didn’t want to wait.

But he cared for her reputation, and would give no one reason to belittle her so she’d remain a maiden until the bedding.

As he came upon the small council room, he tried to shake the thoughts of lust from his brain. He needed a clear mind.

In the room Rhaenyra, Laena, Viserys, Alicent, Otto and Jason were all sitting at the table waiting for him. They all rose and gave gracious bows.

His wife was first to speak, “Good afternoon, husband.” He afforded her nothing but a nod.

“Princess, you look breathtaking. Come with me.” He held his hand out for hers and led her to the head of the table, where Otto had taken the seat to his left. “Switch seats with Otto, my pet. Thank you.”

After the switch was begrudgingly, on one side, made Daemon continued.

“I called you all here to speak of Rhaenyra’s impending betrothal. I understand that Alicent and Otto have come to an agreement, as well as a dowry price for my niece's hand. Fifty thousand gold dragons is no small dowry.” Jason looked quite pleased with himself.

“There are things my niece must be afforded, in any match that is made for her. She will have final say on the man she marries and bears children for,” that effectively wiped the smirk of Jason’s pretentious face. “Her happiness is of the utmost importance to me, and it will be considered.”

The girl in question was beaming at him, her lavender eyes bright and wide. Thank you, they scream.

You’re welcome, my love, he answers.

“We tried that Your Grace, but she has shown no interest in finding a husband. She skirts her duties! So unfortunately, a husband must be found for her,” his brother countered.

“I would treat the Princess well, my King, if you were to grant me her hand. She and any children she would give me would be well taken care of. I swear it. I have even started construction of a dragon pit. I would treat her with the respect she deserves.”

“Ha!” The Princess exclaimed. “Is that why you are going around court telling people that ‘my defiance won’t last long?’ Have you been saying that? Surely no man that respects me would tell anyone that I would soften promptly after the bedding. Right?”

The Lord of Casterly Rock paled, “Princess, I do not know what you have misheard but-,” he tried to wiggle his way out.

“No need for your feeble excuses, Jason. Rhaenyra will not be marrying you.” Rhaenyra reached out and grabbed his hand. The King took a deep breath and turned fully to her.

“Sweetling, I pray to the Fourteen daily for your good health and happiness. There is nothing I want more in life. I hope you find it in your husband.”

She smiled at him, wide and full of teeth. “Thank you, my King. There aren’t words to describe how much I appreciate you.”

“Like I said, you have final say, even in what I am about to propose to you. Understand?” She nodded. “Good.”

He straightened his back and looked to the rest of the room. Laena’s narrowed eyes didn’t escape him, she hated when he spoke in High Valyrian because she had never taken the time to try and learn it.

“If the Princess Rhaenyra will have me, I intend to take her as my wife, as soon as she turns six and ten.” He turned to look at the young girl. “You would be my Queen, Rhaenyra.”

The room erupted, with Laena and Alicent crying out the loudest.

“How dare you? I will not be set aside for the likes of a child. Nearly two decades of marriage and this is how you repay me?!”

“This is ungodly! You have a lawful wife already! This is an abomination!”

Viserys had yet to say anything, he was too stuck on the look gracing his daughter's face. She looked happy, ecstatic even. She launches herself out of her seat and at the King. Thankfully, the King was a warrior and could easily handle her mass. Her shriek cut through all the noise.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you! Of course I will have you, Your Grace!” She threw her arms around his broad shoulders. “It would be an honor to become your wife, kepa. Thank you so much.” She looked at Daemon with such love, such adoration.

“This is wrong! You have a wife already, you cannot set her aside!”

His eyes snapped to Alicent, “I know damn well what I have. You needn’t remind me, good-sister.” He turned to Laena. “I will not be setting you aside, relax. I will be taking Rhaenyra as a second wife. You are right, Laena, two decades and countless trips to your rooms and for what?! Not a single pregnancy. I’ve given you space and respect but I do not have endless patience! I need heirs. I needed them eight and ten years ago.” He reached for Rhaenyra’s hand and pressed a lingering kiss into it. “My niece is young, ripe and fertile. She will give me many sons and daughters, won’t you, my dear?”

She nodded so enthusiastically he thought she might knock a braid loose.

“As many as you want, kepa, I swear it. I won’t disappoint you.”

The King smiled. None in the room knew the long road he’d traveled to get here, to this level of undying loyalty. It didn’t happen without hard work, and it didn’t happen overnight. But anything worth something, would take a little time. And she was definitely worth it.

She would be so good for him, the King knew. He doubted it would even take her long to conceive. She did everything she put her mind to well, and Daemon knew this would be no different.

“Of course you won’t, my love.”

Laena had enough. It was bad enough she’d to get reports of his whore mongering down at Flea Bottom, to hear his exploits screams as she laid in her chambers beside his. Now this?! A second wife? Is he serious? She allowed him so much freedom to do what he wanted and this is what he does? Humiliate her in front of the Seven Kingdoms?

My love? Daemon had never addressed her as anything more than a cold Laena. She was sick already. And she knew he needed heirs, but that’s why she allowed him to fuck whores, she assumed one would get pregnant, maybe they could even pass the babe off as hers if they controlled the narrative well enough. But no. No, Daemon had to continuously disrespect her in front of the masses. What a dutiful husband he was.

“Visenya and Aegon married twice, once for duty and once for love. I shall too.” He grabbed both of Rhaenyra’s hands and stroked the soft skin on the top of it. “I would treat you well, Princess, with adoration and devotion. I swear it on the Flames. You and your children would be loved and taken care of. I will fill your days with laughter, your belly with children and your nights with love. I promise.”

Viserys had since snapped out of his trance.

“She is a child herself! You can’t Daemon. You are twenty years her senior! It isn’t right, and you know it.” He looked at Jason Lannister who still looked dumbfounded. When he looked over to Alicent and Otto, they were fuming. “Jason is the best match she could possibly hope to get! Don’t ruin that with your possessiveness, my King, please,” he pleaded.

It was Rhaenyra who responded to him, though.

“Better than His Grace? No, no. He isn’t. And I wasn’t a child when you were planning to send me off to some fucking rock with a man you haven’t spoken more than three words to!”

“Alicent vetted him! She wouldn’t arrange a bad match for you, Rhaenyra! She is your friend.”

“She’s a whore! One who used me to marry well, and now you’re mad I refuse to be handed off to some lion? Is it so crazy to think I might have ambitions too? Your head is far up Alicent’s ass you can't tell that all she feeds you is shit! You’re pathetic. I can’t wait to be rid of you and your halfbreed family. I don’t want you living here after the wedding. Go back to the Hightower, the lot of you.”

“You ungrateful brat! How dare you speak of me, of your siblings like that? I have only ever tried to guide you, but you resist me! You would rather be in a concubine than the lawful wife of Lord Lannister! How much more foolish could you be?!”

But Rhaenyra had always been self-assured and if anything, Alicent’s disapproval told her this was what was best for her. She was convinced the wench was hell bent on ruining her life.

“You would do well to remember I am your future Queen, and you will not be speaking to me in such a manner anymore. Do you understand me, stepmother?”

Alicent sneered, “And what of the dowry?”

“I will waive it, Alicent, as a gesture of goodwill. No need for you to pay me for my hand. The crown is not lacking for money.” When her eyes popped out of her head he smiled. “Surely you didn’t think I would be paying you?”

“Those fifty thousand gold dragons were going to support our family! How are we to survive with no income if we are to leave here?” She turned to her husband for help. He was none.

Daemon just shrugged. It wasn’t his fucking problem. The only person he cared about was Viserys, but he had chosen the Hightowers. The King had long accepted that truth. He’d tried to show him reason, but you can only lead a horse to water. You can’t make the fool drink.

“You are the daughter of a second son, you must come from hardworking people. Maybe go home and start working hard? Perhaps your uncle might have some work for you. You’re quite good at dressing people,” Rhaenyra chuckled. It delighted her to no end to see the flush of red that swept over Alicent. “Honestly, you should have thought about that before calling your future Queen an ungrateful brat. Now all of you, out. I want a moment alone with my betrothed.”

When Laena lingered Daemon barked out at her, “Did you not hear her command? You’ve been dismissed.” She subsequently left, albeit not without a huff of air and the stomping of her feet. Daemon even dismissed his Kingsguard outside the door.

“Tell me the truth, Rhaenyra. Are you truly happy with my proposal? A sennight ago you were so against marriage and having children. Even if you wish to never marry, you won’t have to,” he faked a grimace.

He knew she was happy and excited to wed him, it was written all over her gorgeous face.

“Of course I am. There is no man more deserving of my hand than you. I know I will find happiness and love with you, that my worth extends beyond the silver hair on my hair or the hue of my eyes. So no, I don’t mind being married or having babes if it’s with you, kepa. I just didn’t want to be sent away, to be parted from you. Alicent had power over me, over my future and she knew it. She was trying to separate us! It wasn’t fair, you’re my best friend. My only friend. We can’t be parted, I wouldn’t be able to bear it, my King,” she’d frowned, her eyes welling with tears.

Relief flooded his body. He worked so hard, for so long for this. It was surreal that it was finally time.

The King took her face into his palms, felt her tears slip past his fingers and pressed his lips to hers in a deep, passionate kiss. “No one shall ever part us, sweet girl.”

[yourtastefulcannibal]

"Hello, Dr Lecter!" *sits next to him on the bench in front of several paintings*

"Thank you for your thoughts on my photo. It's not John Constable who I had in mind, but it was through my first options as well."

"Regarding your lifestyle as a polite individual..." *she sighs softly* "it's understandable and interesting. Being raised as such can influence an individual's behaviour towards the one you adopted it. I can risk to affirm you have nothing to lose by being like this. Yet, I risk again to affirm some might have mocked you for being always so stoic. But I think we both can agree politeness has done no harm to no one.

No worries, you have answered my question just as I expected you to do. I'm satisfied by the explanations I have received."

"I will refer now to your tardiness in replying. Can you agree with me it's considered being rude, Dr Lecter?"

She looks at the man next to her. "I doubt you would allow such behaviour should the situations (not necessarily with me) be reversed. While I understand time is precious and you are indeed a busy man, I'm hoping you have the same notion and you respect the time of your partners of conversation."

"As for my pseudonym you chose for me... yes, I am very pleased. Its meaning and history are very fitting with my self. Yet, the name is rather rare where I'm from because it's considered being an almost archaic name, used for girls at the countryside. But worry not. I will take no offence whatsoever. Some names, despite them being outdated, still remain beautiful and with a beautiful history."

"You mentioned I am a mystery to you. I would be overjoyed to explain why is that? I often considered myself an open book anyone can read."

Aspasia

Aspasia,

It seems you feel slighted by a perceived lack of attention to you on my side of things. That is a stance you are, of course, wholly validated in holding, and with your explicit expectations in mind I will endure not to further upset you in the future, however to make a promise that I will never fall short again would be to assure you of something I am not certain I will be able to uphold. My intention was hardly to be rude, however if this is how you have taken my lack of prompt response, it is hardly within my power to change your mind, nor would I hope to do such a thing.

As for John Constable not being the artist you were seeking, I would be curious if you ever did happen upon the correct artist in question. I did a good deal of research (a part of the reason why that question in particular took such a great deal of time to answer, as I even neglected others during this period of time) and decided upon the romantic style being most apt, but there are so many painters who create art in this style, classical and modern artists alike.

One reason I chose the name ‘Aspasia’ at all was due to its uncommon nature as a name in the modern age. I imagined that something too commonplace would not be befitting for you — while I also feared that too common a name might be underwhelming, where I promised I would offer a unique name. This is coming from a man named ‘Hannibal’ — at times, an uncommon name may be unfortunate and incide ridicule, but also such uncommon names set one aside from the crowd from the outset. It can be seen as a boon or a hinderence, depending on one’s view in the moment.

You are a mystery due to the fact that you seem to know me, my character and life, quite well, while I do not know the same of you. You seem to be intelligent, a lover of art and literature, and one who insists upon fairness and values reciprocity, but beyond this? I know very little of the woman from Romania to whom I speak. Do not feel obligated to share yourself with me, as I know firsthand that the ordeal of being known, as I have heard it called, is a terrifying one. I hardly feel owed, I assure you.

Kind regards,

Hannibal Lecter

[slowdripsunrise]

jfc okay so i have forgotten/been too lazy to write up reveiws here i apparently havent updated since. lone women which is well. so ive read a shit ton since then so i'm going try my best to write up as much as i can in this post bc i don't want to just. stop and skip over stuff. so well. here we go. spoilers for various books under the cut, i'll tag them all !

first book i finished after i last updated was silver nitrate by silvia moreno-garcia. been a while but damn do i remember the fucking vibes. absolutely killer vibes and atmosphere, and the plot was fun and interesting; i do remember being a bit confused in one of the final scenes fighting the guy but it wasnt enough to take me out of the story. the characters felt real and i could feel their love of movies and maybe each other off the page, definitely recommend if you're looking for an atmospheric, creepy little book.

next (and i'll just group these together) i read the poppy war trilogy by r. f. kuang ! absolutely wonderful storytelling and the characters were interesting and loveable. i think that this story succeeds in being one of the few good "war stories" as in it doesn't glorify or make light of any aspects of the war. there are good moments and bright spots throughout, but in the end pretty much every single character we know and love ends up dead, and before they're dead, they've been shaped so thoroughly by the war around them that there is no way anyone could have come out of this series thinking that it in any way romanticized the events. i loved everything about it and more. but while i did love the series. tbh i don't agree with everyone saying that its the most serious and intellectual and groundbreaking book in the entire world. yes it is groundbreaking and yes it is based on a lot of real life horrific events, but it's also. extremely entertaining. it's written beautifully and has some very poignant scenes that i love, and i am gonna be honest i lost where i was going with this point. i think what i'm trying to say is like before i read it, i saw a lot of people on the internet saying that it is like. the highest peak of literature and such and like. for me, it's mostly just a damn good time. i go into most books looking for entertainment (meaning like. i would like to feel emotions, not necessarily happy ones, just emotions in general) and what i think a lot of people made it seem like, was ONLY an epic tome about the brutality of war, the military, and colonization. and it absolutely is about that ! i am not docking points for it being about those things, in fact if it hadn't had all these hard hitting topics i wouldn't have liked it as much. but it's ALSO about rin, kitay, and nezha, and how they love and hate each other. and sometimes i think people lean too much into one aspect of the book, one way or the other (i have absolutely seen the inverse of this, people forgetting about the colonialism and militarization aspects in an impressive show of hypocrisy. which... is worse imo.) but idk. i have no idea what i am trying to say i just like this book yall.

next oml. okay again grouping them together for my own sake but i read the southern reach trilogy by jeff vandermeer ! this series was such a creepy and weird and offputting good time i ate that shit right up. the first book and the biologists pov are my favorites, and all of the insight we get from her and the first book into area x was just. so compelling i could not put that shit down. i'm pretty sure the second i finished in the hospital lol i was INVESTED. and honestly. i did really like the second book. not as much as the first, but i don't think it was bad or underwhelming compared to the first. once i got past the pov shift, i really liked controls pov partly because he is just some guy. like he is just so average and banal, and seeing this set against the absurdity of the rest of the book was really interesting. i liked how even though we weren't IN area x, the southern reach still had that otherworldly and offputting suspenseful energy, even in a familiar setting (office building type i mean. as opposed to weird as fuck forest). that and also i am deep into my f1 phase so like i kept picturing control as checo perez. like hes just so guy to me like hes just a normal guy that has no fucking clue whats going on and thats really funny and awesome to me. like man. anyway the third wasnt my favorite, but i still really like the series as a whole and will probably read the 4th one coming out whenever it does.

NEXT. sharks in the time of saviors by kawai strong washburn. did i cry. maybe. did i really like the story. yes. it was definitely a change of pace for me after reading the above books but the story was lovely and magical and engaging and very sad and i enjoyed every bit of it.

after that i read scattered all over the earth by yōko tawada, which is a story that i kinda have mixed feelings about? i listened to the audio book and the narrator did such a wonderful job, i loved listening to the two man characters talk about language in the mc's made up language, panska. and if the book was just about that, i probably would have liked it more, exploring language and the loss of it; however one of the side characters constantly get's misgenders when the story is outside of her pov. and it's like. really fucking distracting. so like i guess i don't have very mixed feelings about it lol. i liked one bit, definitely did not like another bit, and the rest of the book wasn't really strong enough to sway me back into the "i like this book and think it's interesting" camp. although if you can get past the blatant transphobia, the audio book really is nice to listen to, especially coming off a post surgery high.

next i read the ghost bride by yangsze choo ! this was another really atmospheric, palpable book. i could feel the setting, the humidity, the smells, all of it and it was so good! an engaging story, i'm pretty sure i read this one in a day or two. the characters were fun, the plot moved quickly in a way that made sense, and exploring the realms of the dead and the living with the characters was so fun, definitely recommend !

im gonna wrap this post up here mostly bc im hungry but i still have a lot more to update on ! if u made it this far thank you and also im sorry. happy reading!

[silent-partner-412]

you know, in hindsight, doki doki literature club was VERY underwhelming.

i sort of get why it was popular? i think most people will always find the sort of bait and switch it pulls at least somewhat novel, and i do think that the horror elements were, if nothing else, interesting. it's not a bad game by any means, but i think that if it weren't for the horror elements, it would be.

the main visual novel stuff before it gets all weird and fucked up is just not enjoyable. it's so cutesy and saccharine that it hurts, the dialogue is pandering to an uncomfortable degree, the characters are somehow both annoying and yet also boring, and that's all you get for the majority of the game. if i didn't know that the game was more than just that going in (or if the game was any longer than it was), there's no chance in hell i would've finished it.

which like, okay. i get that this is on some level the point. it's supposed to be a parody of the dating sim/visual novel style. but like, it's a poe's law situation. if it weren't for the horror elements, you wouldn't be able to tell that it's supposed to be a parody/satire. and honestly, i think this makes the horror elements less effective. my thoughts when i got to the first scary scene weren't "holy shit what is going on," they were "oh finally something interesting has happened". which, in my opinion, is a failure on the game's part!!!

i'm still glad i played it for the sake of understanding its place in gaming culture, and i have found great joy in watching youtubers play it when they had no idea what they were getting into. but for me, it failed as a visual novel, and as a psychological horror game, i felt far more scared by other indie games doing similar things.

[scarlet--wiccan]

I think the name of Wanda’s big adversary for this arc is like… scythia of the Bacchae unless I misunderstood something in one of the later solits. I think she’s Darcy’s problem? Which is kind of disappointing that cover with the shadowed villain was like a “who’s that pokemon” thing her being an unestablished villain feels underwhelming

Yes, this character is named Scythia, and she is identified inthe solicits as the leader of the Bacchae.

Just when the Scarlet Witch thinks she’s shielded Darcy Lewis from their new enemy’s vendetta, Scythia returns – covered in armor made from the same antimagic rock Wanda’s been studying. Can Wanda defend Darcy – and herself – against a warrior who’s immune to magic? [x]

In classical literature, the Bacchae are female worshippers of the god Bacchus. Most people are more familiar with their Greek equivalent, the Maenads, who appear in various stories as cult worshippers of Dionysus. The Maenads were famous for tearing men limb from limb during violent fits of religious ecstasy, which is scary, but also pretty metal.

In the Marvel universe, the Bacchae are an ancient clan of warrior women who serve the demigoddess Hippolyta. They're like the Amazons, if the Amazons lived in Manhattan and did organized crime. They popped up a few times in the late-90s/early-2000s as antagonists to both the X-Men and the Fantastic Four, but they are very minor characters. I assume that the Bacchae in Scarlet Witch are the same group, but Scythia is brand new. Hippolyta died a while back, and things have been kind of up in the air with the Greek gods since No Road Home, so I'm guessing that the Bacchae are just under new management.

The Bacchae aren't all immortal-- they recruit regular people, kind of like a gang. I'm assuming that Darcy got involved with them, got in trouble, and had a hard time getting out, which is how she found herself stepping through the Last Door. We'll have to wait to see what Darcy could have done to piss Scythia off so badly, and what, if anything, it has to do with the mystery of the magic-repelling stone.

A couple fun facts about the name "Scythia": the Scythian people were an ancient culture that dominated the Pontic Steppe-- a region very close to where Wanda was born-- from the 6th to 3rd centuries BC. "Scythia" refers to their kingdom during that period. There is a Marvel character called "Scythian Algurus," but he is an alien from the Negative Zone, so I don't think he's related to this new lady. I've seen some folks getting confused about that.

[libraryleopard]

Mid-Year Book Freakout 2023

Tagged by @violaeade, thanks Sabrina!

1. Best book you’ve read so far this year

Aaaahh that's so hard, I've had a really good reading year. I finally read She Who Became the Sun by Shelley Parker-Chan and it really blew me away–the characters! the tension! the narrative foils! the revenge! the ambition! the complicated queerness! I absolutely tore through it even though I was busy with school and walked around thinking about the ending for weeks. I can't wait for the sequel this August and also I am terrified to see what will come.

2. Best sequel you’ve read so far this year

THE THOUSAND EYES BY A.K. LARKWOOD!! Fucking fantastic sequel, took some incredible risks that really paid off and did some amazing things with the characters. Caused me exquisite agony in the best ways possible. Shuthmili's character arc in that book lives in my head RENT free.

3. New release you haven’t read yet

I'm hoping to read A Day of Fallen Night by Samantha Shannon this summer (it is so long but I am so excited for more dragons and lesbians). Also, When the Angels Left the Old Country by Sacha Lamb because I love their short fiction!

4. Most anticipated release for the second half of the year

A Study in Drowning by Ava Reid (gothic YA fantasy about Welsh mythology and a creepy seaside manor) sounds exactly like my kind of book and I'm quite excited for it.

5. Biggest disappointment

Probably The Hacienda by Isabel Cañas. I've gotten really into gothic literature lately and I was super excited at the idea of a postcolonial gothic set in 1800s Mexico but it just felt kind of like a middling mash-up of Rebecca and Mexican Gothic. Subpar gothic atmosphere, some nonsensical plot points, boring romance, standard prose. Alas!

6. Biggest surprise

I read Little Blue Encyclopedia (For Vivian) by Hazel Jane Plante on kind of a whim because the idea of a novel told in the form of an encyclopedia entry for a fictional TV show sounded interesting (I love stories that experiment with form) and it turned out to be an incredible exploration of grief and friendship and trans community that packed a lot of nuance and emotion into a very short work.

7. Favorite new author (debut or new to you)

Ava Reid! Her debut novel, The Wolf and the Woodsman, was a personally kinda underwhelming to me, but their second novel, Juniper and Thorn, was an incredible gothic fantasy exploration of abuse and I think she really found her authorial voice through it. Super excited for their YA debut coming out this fall, it sounds very up my alley. Also, having read Andrew Joseph White's debut novel Hell Followed With Us, I am absolutely keeping an eye out for his future works.

8. Newest fictional crush/newest favorite character

I'm reading Spindrift by Anna Burke right now and Morgan Donovan I am free to hang out on Thursday when I am free to hang out…

Also, Heather After from G. Willow Wilson's Sandman spin-off comic The Dreaming: The Waking Hours is incredible (trans anarchist sorceress) and I love her.

9. Book that made you cry

I don't really cry over books, but Among Others by Jo Walton made me so unbearably sad as someone who has a twin sister (though I do have some problems with that novel).

10. Book that made you happy

 I read Highly Suspicious & Unfairly Cute by Talia Hibbert because I enjoyed her adult romance novels and thought it was adorable, absolutely top-notch YA rom-com. (Also, I relate to Brad so much considering he is a teenage boy jock named Brad.)

Tagging uhhhh oh god @kazz-brekker @acewizard @shirleyjacksons @displayheartcode and any other book-inclined people who see this and want to answer? (i'm very bad at remembering mutuals off the top of my head, sorry!)

[ciaran]

sometimes the story just doesn't hit,,, no such thing as universably loveable literature, after all! i saw a person doing a reaction thread and was underwhelmed by a moment i and a lot of other fans loved, which just goes to show that what suits one person won't work for another, and such

yeah, pretty much! i know that a lot of the stuff i like and consider deeply moving and important is just utterly forgettable for a lot of people and that's fine, I'm not offended by that.

I'm also, in general, more drawn to flawed media that has cracks i can sink my own interpretation and headcanons into. tlt feels like a very definitive text to me with very little room for interpretation? which makes it a good read but means that a lot of fandom takes about it fall flat because they are either restating what the text says or making very little sense bc they're headcanoning detached from the text. of course, there's middle ground, but it's not interesting for me to find it or think about it, so I'm just going to let this stand.

oh no, wait, another thing—i find the writing style of tlt incredibly grating. something about it pisses me off for no reason i can identify in a way which rarely happens for me. either i find something dry but readable (Sanderson) or difficult to read but still something i can get through if I try (Dorothy Dunnett) or just straight up uninteresting to unpack (can't recall examples). rarely does a style of writing make me wish to take a hammer to it and reconstruct the sentences to be less fucking tortured

[howlsmovinglibrary]

Mid-Year Book Freakout 2023

Thanks for the tag @books-are-portals!

1. Best book you’ve read so far this year

It’s a tie between Emily Wilde’s Encyclopedia of Faeries by Heather Fawcett, A House With Good Bones by T Kingfisher, and The Adventures of Amina al-Sirafi by S.A. Chakraborty.

2. Best sequel you’ve read so far this year

Hell Bent by Leigh Bardugo!!! (a fully unhinged book)

3. New release you haven’t read yet

Translation State by Ann Leckie (although to be fair it only released last week).

4. Most anticipated release for the second half of the year

I’m really looking forward to Thornhedge by T Kingfisher, Silver Nitrate by Silvia Moreno-Garcia, and A Curse for True Love by Stephanie Garber.

5. Biggest disappointment

My one DNF book so far, Unseelie by Ivelisse Housman. I thought it would be a fun fey fantasy book but it was very clunky and generic, with a very underwhelming love interest.

6. Biggest surprise

Genuinely surprised by how much I enjoyed We Were Villains by ML Rio - although having remembered how much the author made fun of YA literature and booklr’s tastes back in the day it was fucking hilarious to me just how YA and HOW VERY TUMBLR that book was.

7. Favorite new author (debut or new to you)

AK Larkwood!! I was surprised by how much I loved The Unspoken Name. 

8. Newest fictional crush/newest favorite character

Both Wendle Bambleby and Emily Wilde, for both of these prompts in the true nature of bisexuality. 

9. Book that made you cry

I don’t think I’ve cried at a book this year, but we’ll see I guess!!

10. Book that made you happy

To be honest, nearly all the books I’ve read this year have made me happy, because this year I genuinely feel like I’ve gotten over my pandemic reading slump and actually started to get back into the groove of reading. (but if you want a non-soppy non-cop out answer then the reading hat trick of Hell Bent, The Unspoken Name and Amina al-Sirafi back to back bc they were all fucking 5* bangers and it was a really good week to be reading)

Tagging! @pearlcaddy, @serkershit , @eldritchcow, @vagabondly and anyone else who wants to do it!! :)