#but the key is that it *should* be ok and i shouldn't feel like i can't enter certain spaces for fear of being dragged for my apathy
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would people drag me if i negged the pirate game on main
#i don't actually care that much either way but the implication from many fans that i *should* kind of bothers me#it's not even that i was coping for K3 or JE3 or anything else specific because i knew those weren't going to happen already#i just have zero capacity to care about 'the first solo majima game' at this point in time#certainly not when majima has been playable more times than several other characters#like. yknow. saejima. shinada. tanimura#and ichiban ofc he's only had one solo game and he's literally the new main protagonist of the entire series#like i thought 8 was about passing the torch to the next generation#point being that number of 'solo games' is not a good metric for how much 'content' a character 'gets to' have#truly i do not give a single shit about the game outside of 'i think it should be a historical spin-off or star new characters instead'#i can just not buy or play it. i can save £55 of my gaming budget.#what bothers me is the fan response to it and to folk not being 100% /pos about it because half of you fuckers thought 8 was too convoluted#like i have to reiterate i don't have much to say about the game itself other than 'this isn't for me and that's ok'#but the key is that it *should* be ok and i shouldn't feel like i can't enter certain spaces for fear of being dragged for my apathy#i guess what i should have asked initially is whether it's ok to neg the fandom on main lmao#anyway idk how much i'll post here realistically until the next game announcement i'm probably just gonna keep to my smaller curated spaces#Once Again if anyone wants my discord you need only ask#don't be intimidated i'm definitely more scared of receiving your message than you are of sending it to me#me#text#8 gaiden
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Alright because of all the support on my last post with Stiles, I figured I should write another 😚👍
Worried Sick Stiles Stilinski x fem!reader
Context: established relationship, Stiles comes to visit you when you don't show up to school
Warnings: none, just fluff
Wordcount: 1.1k
You had been in your room curled up in bed, tangled in blankets and stuffed animals all while you were supposed to be at school.
You had just gotten your period and your cramps left you nothing short of bedridden and on the verge of throwing up all day. You were experiencing womanhood at its absolute finest, to say the least.
Suddenly, the door to your room swung open, and a very confused and distressed Stiles entered your room. His expression softened once he saw you weren't dead or bleeding out, and a wave of relief seemed to wash over him.
"Not using the window to get in anymore?" You asked jokingly, rolling to your side to face Stiles who had now set down his bag and kneeled at the side of your bed. Being Scott's twin, you and Stiles needed to keep your relationship a secret. That's why when it came to hanging out, Stiles would always come in through your window rather than your front door so the both of you wouldn't get caught.
"Well, you gave me a key to your house for a reason right? Also going in through the window would've taken me too long," Stiles explains, his expression still slightly filled with worry as he placed one of his hands on your bed while the other tucked a strand of hair behind your ear.
"What were you in such a rush for?" You ask with a chuckle in reaction to Stiles's seriousness, snaking your hand out of your covers and placing it on top of his.
"Well you didn't show up to school and I was worried," He explains, his expression soft and genuine. "I thought something bad might've happened," He says quietly and slowly.
For any other boyfriend, his girlfriend not showing up to school shouldn't cause them this much stress, but considering all the supernatural shit Stiles has somehow managed to get involved in, he couldn't help but worry himself to death.
"I'm okay Stiles, really I am," You say, reassuring him, "Just on my period that's all," You explain, trying to manage a smile but your stomach felt like it was being turned inside out, so it probably came out as more slightly disturbing than comforting.
"Ok good, I thought it could've had something to do with that. Which is why-" Stiles says, relieved, as he gets up and grabs his bag before sitting down next to you on the bed. "I have come prepared," He continues with a goofy smirk plastered on that stupidly cute face of his.
You sit up lazily as Stiles begins to show you what he bought. He whips out a plastic bag from inside of his backpack with items ranging from Tylonal, Advil, and Mydol, (which you immediately snatched and swallowed), all the way to chocolates and a heated stuffed animal.
"I got confused when I saw all the... feminine products, so- um-" He explains while taking out yet another plastic shopping bag from his backpack to reveal at least ten different boxes of tampons and pads.
You pause and stare at the ginormous haul of items that Stiles has bought you and you can't help but feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude.
You appreciated Stiles and his caring towards you more than anything, especially in moments like these. He always knew the right things to do and the right things to say, and you loved him for it.
Stiles, however, didn't take your silence in the right way. "I'm sorry- it's stupid I know, I bought way too much. I bet I still have the receipt somewhere, maybe I can still return it-" He asked, sadness and disappointment slowly creeping into his voice.
"No!" You reply quickly. "Don't return it, and none of this is stupid," You confirm before sighing for a moment. "Stiles, this is literally like the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me," You explain, turning to look at him while you say it, a smile slowly forming on your face as you do so.
"Really?" Stiles questions, his embarrassed expression being replaced by one of relief and pride.
"Really," You say while scooting over in your bed and patting the space next to you, beckoning him to join you.
Stiles lays down next to you, and you gladly roll over and climb on top of him, resting your head by the crook of his neck as you wrap your arms around him. The heat radiated off of his body as you listened to his heartbeat and the slow movements of his chest going up and down.
Stiles brought the covers over you and kissed your head before speaking once more, "You don't want to use the stuffed animal I gave you?" He asks with a chuckle as he wraps his arms around you, his thumb rubbing soft circles into your back.
"Nope, I think you'll do just fine," You say as you lift your head to look up at him.
Stiles takes this moment to lean down and kiss you gently. He kissed and held you as if you were the most fragile thing in the world. As if with one wrong move you'd shatter into a million pieces, so he treated you with such care, holding you softly and closely to make sure you didn't.
Though the kiss only lasted a few moments, it made you forget all about the pain you felt in your abdomen and replaced it with butterflies. He definitely had a way of making you feel safe and comfortable whenever you were around him.
Once he pulled away, he looked at you with hearts in his eyes, "You're so beautiful, you know that right baby?" He said, his voice so faint that it practically made your heart beat out of your chest. He removed one of his hands from your back and placed it on your cheek and you immediately melted into his touch.
You could only let out a satisfied hum in response, you were too lost in his features to bother replying coherently.
Stiles let out a low chuckle as he kissed your forehead, his hand moving from your cheek to the back of your head, stroking your hair as he did so.
"Get some sleep okay?" He said while wrapping his arm just a bit tighter around you, "I'll be right here if you need anything," He said softly.
"I know," You say, your words muffled slightly as you rest your head in the crook of his neck, "You're not goin' anywhere," You say with a smile as you place a quick kiss on his neck.
"Didn't plan on it," Stiles mumbles, about to fall asleep even before you do. But as your meds kick in, you can't help but slowly drift off to sleep as well.
Okay, I'm having WAYYYYYY too much fun writing these I'm sorry 😭
I finished majority of my finals so I'm going to be much more active again so keep sending in requests! I'm continuing to work on them
Also, I cannot thank you guys enough for all of the compliments and praise I've received on my last post with Stiles, it was literally so sweet of you guys. My inbox was literally filled with people praising my writing and y'all have no idea how happy that made me, like literally my heart almost burst.
#teen wolf stiles#teen wolf#teenwolf#teen wolf fanfiction#teen wolf imagine#stiles stilinski#teen wolf stiles stilinski#stiles stilinski fanfiction#stiles x reader#stiles stilinski imagine#teen wolf x reader#x reader#teen wolf fanfic#stiles stilinski x reader#stiles fluff
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steddie | 1,7k words | angst | mature
Written for @steddieangstyaugust Day 13
Prompt: "Please, Stay"
Read Part 1 | Part 2
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Eddie spends a lot of time having no words.
As Steve carries him back to the beemer, Eddie doesn't have words. He hums against Steve's shoulder when Steve asks him if it's ok for him to put him down but in reality he would very much like to keep clinging to Steve.
He has no words as Steve pats his pockets until he finds his keys to open the trailer door and he almost says something to calm Steve down about Wayne not being there but Steve doesn't seem worried about it.
Which really should clue him in that there are things he is unaware of, but his face is bloodied and his chest hurts every time he breathes and he doesn't have energy to worry about it.
Steve carries him to the couch and puts him down gently, but it still hurts.
Eddie closes his eyes when his head hits the pillow but he lets out a low groan when he feels Steve moving away.
"I need to clean you," Steve says and Eddie can hear him moving through the trailer. Maybe he should feel embarrassed, but he doesn't.
Steve Harrington is at his house after all. If Eddie plays his cards right maybe he'll get his Star Wars marathon after all.
When he comes back, Eddie almost says something, but then Steve is touching him and it hurts but it's also so good. He's gentle and sweet and he bats Eddie's hands away when he tries to touch his cut.
"Behave, Eddie," Steve says, and Eddie groans, but he abides.
When he's done, Eddie immediately misses his touch.
"I'm gonna get you something for the pain. I think you might have a broken rib and the best advice I can give you is to rest and wait until it's healed."
Eddie groans again and delights himself with Steve's laugh as he walks around the trailer as if he belongs there. Eddie imagined someone like Steve wouldn't feel comfortable in a shithole like the trailer.
Not that Eddie doesn't love it. He does. So fucking much. But Steve lives in a mansion, his bedroom alone is probably bigger than Eddie's entire house.
Steve comes back and he helps Eddie to sit down. He feels better, even if everything still hurts. But he's home and Steve's there because he found him by some miracle and now he's putting a glass of water to Eddie's lips and helping him swallow a pill that will probably make him sleepy.
Steve smiles proudly when Eddie drinks the entire glass and moves to put it back in the kitchen and that's when Eddie sees it.
His eyes move to their old center table and he knows what he's going to find there. One of his Star Wars cassettes that he was too lazy to put away the other day.
Maybe he could get away with suggesting they watch it but as his brain is considering the best way to ask Steve that, he spots something that so obviously doesn't belong there he has no idea how he hadn't noticed it before.
A big bouquet of flowers. Red roses, if Eddie is not mistaken.
He moves even as his entire body seems about to catch on fire and grabs it, pulling it closer to smell it.
They smell good. Eddie doesn't think he ever saw such gorgeous flowers and he knows for a fact Wayne didn't buy them. He's more of a Peonies kind of guy.
Which only leaves...
"Oh, uh, sorry, I shouldn't have-" Steve says once he's back, and he moves to get the flowers but Eddie holds on to them.
"Did you really stood up a date to go rescue me?" Eddie asks, and he doesn't know why he does it.
Steve frowns as he looks down at Eddie, "Oh, no, the flowers are-"
Eddie breaks eye contact with Steve because he feels bad now. Glances at the clock, it's almost nine.
"If you show up at her doorstep with these flowers, I bet she'll forgive you for missing the date," Eddie says, and then he raises the bouquet in Steve's direction so he can take it. "I'm sorry I got in the way."
Steve grabs the flowers and Eddie thinks this is it, he's going to leave and Eddie will be left alone to lick his wounds. But then he puts them back on the table and kneels in front of Eddie.
"Don't be sorry. I was worried about you and I'm glad I trusted my gut," Steve says and he does the sweetest thing, cupping Eddie's face and looking directly into his eyes.
Eddie feels... naked. Completely stripped of his attitude and his snark and everything else he uses to protect himself.
The worst of it all is that it feels good. He feels a calm washing over him when he's this close to Steve. He has no idea when his dynamic with Steve changed from the King and the Freak to this.
To Steve on his knees on the trailer being the one fucking good thing in Eddie's life right now.
But Eddie knows better than to believe that things are really like this. That even if Steve is something good in his life, he knows it's not the same for Steve. Eddie is still just his drug dealer, the one person who can get him some weed for free.
"You don't have to do that," Eddie says and Steve raises a brow. Up this close, Eddie can count the freckles on his face and he's trying so hard not to stare at his lips.
"Do what?"
"Take care of me," Eddie says even as he's cringing inside. Even as if all he ever wanted was someone to take care of him like Steve is doing and now he's pushing him away.
"I don't mind," Steve says as his thumb moves on Eddie's cheek.
It's too soft and Eddie is all sharp edges.
"You don't have to do that to get free weed."
Steve pulls back as if he got burned. There's a shift in his expression that Eddie hates and he thinks maybe this is the reason he has nothing good in his life.
"Maybe I should go," Steve says and Eddie feels it on a molecular level. He doesn't want Steve to go but he doesn't know how to ask him to stay.
"Don't forget the flowers," Eddie says and Steve looks at him like he's insane.
"Eddie," he says softly. Eddie sees him almost reaching his hand but giving up mid-air.
"She probably won't even care about the flowers, dude. If you show up looking like this, she'll take you anyway."
Steve presses his lips together. He's annoyed, Eddie can tell, but he has no idea why. Eddie is complimenting Steve and the fact that all he has to do is smile and then he has any girl he wants.
"That's good, because the flowers weren't for 'her'," Steve says the last word making air quotes and Eddie doesn't get it.
"I'm not following," Eddie says. He's still on the couch and Steve is still on his knees and it's so fucking weird.
"There's no girl, Eddie," Steve says and maybe Eddie hit his head when he fell because this doesn't make sense.
"Are they for your mother?" He asks and even as he does it he knows it's a dumb question. Steve doesn't talk about his family a lot, but from the little he does, Eddie knows his mom is not the flower type.
She would need to be around for his son to get her flowers.
"You know they are not for my mother. I carried you inside, Eddie. How the hell would I've brought the flowers too?"
Eddie stares at him as he lets the words sink in. It's a little embarrassing that Steve had him in his arms, especially because he could've walked on his own but Steve felt warm and nice and Eddie had no idea when he would have him this close again.
"The flowers were already here," Eddie says under his breath and he can't lie, Steve's exasperated expression is kind of cute.
"The flowers were already here," Steve repeats as if Eddie needs him to. And maybe he does because that doesn't make sense unless...
"Were you here waiting for me? Did Wayne let you in?"
Steve smiles and claps his hands once as if he's proud of Eddie for figuring it out.
"I was waiting for you. And Wayne did let me in. I was actually waiting in my car because I didn't know if you'd appreciate me meeting your uncle like this, but he tapped on my window and said he knew who I was and told me I could wait inside if I wanted. He had to leave and said you'd probably be here soon and then you weren't and I started getting worried and I decided to go look for you."
Steve says all in one go and Eddie feels glued in place as he looks at him. Wayne knows Eddie's been sporting a huge crush on Steve for months and he knows his uncle was delighted that he would have something to mock Eddie with.
"Why were you waiting for me?" Eddie asks and he feels dumb as the words leave his mouth but Steve just smiles fondly, as if he thinks it's cute that Eddie is that naive.
"With flowers," Steve adds and Eddie sighs.
"Why were you waiting for me with flowers, Steve?"
"Because," Steve says and Eddie's afraid he's not going to elaborate. That he's going to leave Eddie to figure out for himself and worse, that he's just going to leave because he can't take Eddie's dumbness. "I was hoping the flowers would make my intentions clear."
"I'm not sure they did," Eddie says, eyeing the flowers behind Steve. They are nice. The kind of flowers you get for someone you really care about.
"Eddie!" Steve says and Eddie snorts because he's being a little shit on purpose. "I'm going to leave."
"Please, Steve," Eddie says and he has him again. Doe eyes and full attention on him. "Please, stay."
Steve smiles and nods and Steve leans in and Eddie thinks he's going for a kiss but he just hugs Eddie and for now, that's enough.
#i'm sorry#I know you want them to kiss#and they will#but they have to suffer a little bit more first#steddie#angst#steddie fic#steve harrington#eddie munson
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Issues T | 608 words Prompt for steddielovemonth: Love is being able to say you're sorry and mean it
"No, that's enough!" Eddie yells, slamming his hands onto the table with a deafening thud. "I'm fucking sick of this!"
"You're sick of this?" Steve echoes, upper lip curling with disgust. "How the hell do you think I feel?"
"How the fuck am I supposed to know? It's not like you ever talk to me about anything!"
"Don't pretend you suddenly care now!"
"Jesus Christ, I've always cared! You're the one too fucking focused on your ego to notice what anyone else is going through!"
"That's a joke. You've never been there when Dustin needs you to sit with-"
"He doesn't need me! He's never asked for me! He needs you because you're the one that makes him feel safe!"
"He needs you too! We almost lost you and Dustin had to-"
"I know! We've already-"
"He still has nightmares about it!"
"Oh for- whatever. Dustin still needs support, got it. You do too!"
"This is stupid, you're stupid."
"That- what are you doing?"
"Leaving. I'm gonna stay with Robin for the night."
"Seriously?!"
Steve doesn't reply. He grabs the small bag that he's thrown a change of clothes into, grabbing his shoes and keys, and slamming the door shut behind him.
Eddie gawps at the empty doorway for a minute, only moving to follow when he hears the beemer roar to life.
"Steve!" He tries.
But Steve ignores him, barely sparing him a glance, pulling out and driving away.
"What the fuck," Eddie whispers to himself, reluctantly going back inside.
He knows too well how much worse an argument can get if he tries to follow Steve on the rare occasion that he needs to leave.
But he also expects Steve to be back in the morning, either with his tail between his legs or demanding an apology.
He does neither. He doesn't come back in the morning.
Or the afternoon.
Or the evening.
The sun has long since set by the time Eddie parks on the street outside the Buckley household.
"Eddie," Robins mom greets warmly.
"Hey, uh... is Steve here?"
"Yes, he stayed the night, they're just up in Robbie's room."
"Could, uh... could you tell them I'm here?"
"You can go up, dear, it's no worries."
"I know, it's... uh..."
"ah," she smiles knowingly, patting his shoulder. "Alright. I'll go let them know. He'll be down in a moment."
"Thank you."
Waiting in the cold, on the porch, is horrifying.
Thankfully, he doesn't have to wait long before the door opens again and Steve steps out, looking awkward and sheepish.
He shuts the door behind him, crossing his arms, looking anywhere except at him.
"I'm sorry," Eddie finally chokes out. "I didn't mean to push, I really am just... I'm worried about you. It scares me sometimes but I shouldn't have lashed out at you because of that."
Steve stares at him for a moment, face blank, before he frowns. Confused, he says, "what?"
"I'm sorry."
"No, I heard, it... you aren't the one who should be apologising."
"I pushed you when I should have-"
"No, Ed, you were trying to take care of me and I-"
"Steve, stop it. I wasn't listening to you. I'm sorry."
"It's ok, really. It's not like I was trying to have a conversation or something. I just got..."
"Scared?"
"Yeah, I guess."
"I'm sorry I made you feel like that. But, like... if you ever do need help with any of that, I'm right here. I want to help."
"When I'm ready."
"When you're ready."
"Ok. Thank you, Eds. I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have started yelling at you like that."
"It's ok. We'll work through it."
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Forget Him Sweetheart
Gojo Saturo x fem reader
Synopsis: You were just cheated on by your shit ex and go seek comfort from your friend Gojo, but one thing leads to another and soon you receive a huge comfort
You open the door to your apartment and head inside. So many things going on in your head and all of it gave you the biggest migraine. You close the door behind you and set your keys on the little table beside you. You stand there for a second and then your tears start to fall. You were able to hold them back when you saw your boyfriend cheating on you, on the drive home, and on the way up to your apartment. You wanted to be that woman you've always seeked to be. The one that would throw away her man like trash when he was caught cheating and not even be phased about it, but you couldn't hold them back. It only hurt your head more.
You walk to your bedroom and wrap yourself under the covers. This pain was immense, it hurt so much anyone could hear it in your cry. You grab one of your stuffed animals and cry into them trying to avoid being too loud. You never thought of yourself as cheatable but right now that's all you're calling yourself. Someone who can be cheated on easily. That night you fall asleep crying thinking that the last thing you thought of was yourself as unlovable but really the last thought in your head before you fell asleep was the thought of him, Gojo Saturo.
The next day you were working at your job. A cafe where a regular would visit. All the baristas fawned over him and honestly you did too. How could you not he was so tall and charming and not to sound full of yourself, he had a thing for you. Always calling you by pet names, sweet thing and sweetheart, he made you feel beautiful. Your friend had a way with women and you've always told him his future wife would be the luckiest girl on earth.
Speak of the devil, a tall white-head enters the cafe and immediately makes eye contact with you. He smirks and goes to sit at a table by the window. You go and stand next to him, "Hello ready for your order?"
Gojo looks up at you with an eyebrow raised, "What's wrong sweetheart. No 'Good Sir' today?" You have gotten close to him to the point where you'd call him Sir or Mr as a joke. Your guys relationship had a little bit of teasing in it but thats all it was you never thought more of it.
You gave a weak smile. "Oh sorry, I've just been," a flashback of your boyfriend kissing another womans neck came to your head. You heart pound against your chest and you subconsciously clutched the fabric of your uniform above your heart. You sighed, "I just been under the weather lately." You tried of thinking about anything else that would stop the tears from falling.
Gojo did not like the view in front of him. Why was sweet thing crying? He could tell that something was wrong but he knew he shouldn't push you here of all places. He could also tell that you were trying to hide it and probably felt embarrassed.
He chuckles softly, "Well then, I have my order ready."
You look at him and get ready to write down his order in your little notepad. He looks at you, "The whole menu. Cuz it's me-n-u." You're stunned but you laugh anyway. Gojo smirks, there we go that's better. Seeing that smile on your face just looks right.
You shove his shoulder playfully, "You wierdo."
He chuckles, "Ok for real though, can I get the espresso with..." he looks back at the menu for a bit but then turns to you "What are your favorite cookies from here?"
You smile at him, "I like (f/c). They're amazing Gojo! You should try them."
He puts his menu down, "Alright then sweetheart I'll have two (f/c) please."
You write down his order in your little notepad and giggle, "Alright then we'll have your order ready for you in no time."
He leans back in his chair "I'll be waiting. Don't take too long." he says giving you a wink. You blush and turn around to make his coffee all while Gojo stares at you in your cute uniform.
Gojo is smooth as hell. He didn't take his eyes of you. Anytime you were gonna look at his direction he'd already turn away to avoid your gaze. His strong instincts just knew that something was wrong. While you were making his coffee you looked a bit too sad when usually you would be smiling and he'd get to enjoy watching you be cute. Whatever happened to make you this depressed made him want to fight your problems for you. He would fight for you but you two established from the start that you guys would just be friends and so he knew it was not his place to go fending for you. That was your boyfriends' job.
After a while he finishes his drink and was on his last cookie. He grabs the last one and takes a bite of it. Why are you so cute? Even your favorite cookies were cute like you. He gets up and heads towards you where you were cleaning one of the tables. He acts dramatic when he says "MMM! These are good. I was expecting you to have terrible taste." he teases.
"Tch you're the one with terrible taste. Don't go rubbing it off on me." you tease back. By now the cafe has gotten filled with customers so you go back cleaning the table you were cleaning. You wish you could've just stayed home and take the day off. After what happened last night you honestly didn't have the will to work today. But if you didn't than you never were gonna become that strong woman who doesn't cry over a man.
"Sweet thing." Gojo calls for you softly interrupting your thoughts.
You look up at him. Although his eyes are covered with a blindfold, you can still read his facial expression. He had a soft look on him like if he was worried for you. You stare at his facial features and then he holds out the last piece of his (f/c) for you to eat. You stood there frozen for a sec. The rest of the cafe disappeared and right now it was just you and him. Then after a while you open your mouth and go to eat the cookie he has in his hand for you. You were careful to not put your lips on his fingers, but you accidentally did, and you didn't move back. You loved his taste and frankly he loved the feeling your pretty lips touching his fingers. You slowly pull away and chew on the cookie and then looked up at him.
He's looking down at you and then he rests the palm of his hand on your cheek. "Listen darling, if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here for you. I'm here to listen and comfort you. Ok?" he says waiting for a response.
In a quiet voice you say "Ok" and he smiles softly at you. Without another word he turns around and leaves. You stood there for a bit watching him leave.
For the rest of your shift, you didn't stop thinking about him. Truth is you did need someone to talk to and you also just wanted to see and be with him. So when you got of work instead of going home you went to his place. You're not sure why but you get the feeling that soon after your gonna forget all about these thrash feelings right now.
Finally you arrive and you go up to his door. You ring the doorbell to his huge house and after a while he opens the door. "Oh sweet thing! What are you doing here?" he asks leaning towards you.
You respond shyly "You said I can talk to you when I need someone. Gojo I need someone." Gojo shocked allows you inside and he brings you to his living room. He was being so sweet the entire time. You've never seen this side of him and you've never had anyone be that kind to you. Not even your own boyfriend. Your boyfriend cheating came back to mind.
You stop walking and Gojo turns around and goes to you a bit worried. You sniff "I'm sorry it's just-" you get cut off by Gojo. Telling you that shouldn't apologize for feeling upset. Gojo goes closer to you and you feel safe. Such a pretty feeling, you've been around strong men before but not once have you ever felt this intense feeling of comfort and security.
You let go, "My boyfriend cheated on me. I don't know why he did it. I know I'm not all that pretty but the least he could've done is brake up with me. It would've stung yes but not as much as this." You continue to cry and the entire time Gojo hates it. That fucking bastard. He thought that guy was doing his job of fending for you.
"I'm such an unlovable piece of shit! I'm not worth being loved"
Those words made Gojo wrap his arms around you. He was avoiding touching you because he didn't want to invade any of your personal space, but after hearing those heartbreaking words he knew he had to hold you.
You continue to let out your emotions in his chest. The whole time Gojo did not let go and after a while you begin to calm down. "Baby listen to me." Baby? You wipe your tears again and look up at him. "Its the other way around, that bastard does not deserve to love you. You deserve only the best kind of love and trust me when i say you do have it." He pulls a strand of hair behind your ear. He smirks, "I know you're not supposed to hear this right now but I love you sweetheart. Always had and always will and hearing you talk like this hurts. Seeing you cry hurts sweet thing. You are loved. I love you sweetheart."
God how you needed to hear those words. I love you. And those words are coming from him. You slowly start to realize the whole time you should've been with him. You start to realize that it's not your fucking boyfriend cheating on you that made you cry. It was the lack of love. The lack of his love. It was him that made has always made you feel beautiful and loved and right now you wanted that even more.
Gojo notices how your look went from sadness to lust. Careful with his next move he decides to let you do whatever you want to him. You lean in closer to lips and with that he lets you kiss him. Thats all he needed and now he can pull you closer by you waist and deepen your kiss. He continues to kiss you and then pulls away.
The taste was amazing unlike anything you've ever tasted before. Gojo smirks, "I wasn't expecting you to get so bold sweet thing." You're so hot now. You want more of him.
"Gojo please~" you sigh.
"What? Does baby want me to help her feel good?" he teases.
Now you go to kiss him again to which he happily returns. Without breaking the kiss he picks you up effortlessly and you wrap your legs around his waist. He takes you upstairs to his bedroom and places you on his bed. He gets on top of you and smirks, "Let me help you forget him sweetheart."
He takes your clothes off and you take his off. There you two were, fully naked with him on top but he was still wearing his blindfold. You reach out to take it off of him and he let's you, revealing his beautiful blue eyes. "You look beautiful" you tell him. He smiles and kisses your lips "As do you sweetheart"
He kisses every part of your body making sure you understand just how much he loves every part of you. All this riled up energy both of you have for each other leads to him positioning himself at your entrance already. You look up him with those gorgeous eyes and he goes to kiss you on your lips, "I'm gonna take good care of you darling." and before you can say anything he starts sliding into you.
He's so big, "Ah~ Gojo" you whimper and the only thing Gojo hears is music to his ears. Fuck so far he's been loving your cute noises but that whimper of filling you up made him smirk. He kisses your neck "Fuck baby you're so tight~" he says in a husky voice. You wrap your arms around his neck and wrap your arms around his waist wanting to feel every bit of him.
Gojo holds onto your hips "You're so cute when you're like this." he dotes on you. You look up at him with little tears in his eyes, "Please move~". So demanding, he licks your tears away and smirks, "Your wish is my command." He starts thrusting into you causing a wave of euphoria to rush into both of you. You feel amazing, he feels like he's in heaven and he wants, needs, you to feel the same so he focuses and making you feel good.
"Fuck yes~" you moan out loud. He's pounding into you with such force its driving you wild. As he continues to thrust into you he's looking at your face. Seeing you feel so good made him feel good and your noises drive him wild. You look into his eyes and the whole world disappears. Right now it's just you two making love and it feels so heavenly.
"Kiss me~" you moan, he leans in and kisses you. The kiss was full of passion and lust.
He pulls away, continuing to thrust into you the room full of moans and your whimpering. "Is my princess feeling good~" he moans to you which you nod your head, "Yes baby~ you feel so fucking good~"
50 minutes later of him thrusting into you and you hanging on for dear life and your phone rings. Gojo didn't even see it but it was right beside your head. He looks at the caller ID and its that fucking bastard. He answers the call and puts it on loud speaker.
Baby can we please talk about this
At the sound of that Gojo starts thrusting in and out faster and rougher and you moan but he's quick to kiss you, so you don't give away your secret just yet.
I miss you (Y/N). That girl meant nothing to me, I promise if you come back things will be different.
Gojo is thrusting into you with rage. He'll be damned if he thinks you'll go back to him. You whimper his name making Gojo smirk, he's got you now and he's not gonna let you go.
"(Y/N) please give me another chance.
Both of you laughed at that and Gojo pulls out flips you onto your tummy thrusts back into you causing you to let out a load moan. He's pounding you faster and rougher and he's not being dicrete about it anymore.
"(Y/N)?" the guys calls for you with confusion in his voice.
Gojo smirks, "My baby isn't going back to him huh? Who do you belong to princess?" he asks between pants. Loud and and proud for him to hear. You respond "I belong to you Gojo.~" you say breathlessness and before the guy can say another word Gojo hangs up on him and now you're both at your reach.
"Gojo I'm *whimper* close~" you moan out. Gojo grabs your jaw and makes you look up at him. He kisses you, moaning in it, and then says "Me too baby. Together yeah? On three" you nod your head eagerly.
One.
You're already such a moaning mess and this causing you to moan even louder the whole world can hear.
Two.
Fuck Gojo is so close he starts pounding into you at an insane speed and with such force causing you cry out.
Three!
You both release and make it well known with your voices. He falls onto you panting and chuckles lightly, "That was amazing sweetheart." You reach up to play with his hair "You were amazing baby." He gives you a gentle kiss and says he'll be back. He leaves to the bathroom and comes back with a towel. He wipes you both down and then lays in bed with you holding you close.
"Gojo?" you call his name. He looks at you with his mesmerizing blue eyes, "I love you." he smiles "I love you too sweetheart"
You are that woman you want to be. A strong woman who forgets all about her cheating boyfriend and when she goes to find a better man to help her feel good.
#gojo saturo x you#gojo x reader#gojo x y/n#gojo x you#gojo saturo#jjk gojo#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk smut#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk x y/n#jujutsu gojo#jjk gojo satoru#jjk gojo smut#gojo smut
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Ok, so imagine you're dating Aki and he knows Denji has a crush on you, so Aki makes a point of fucking you on the couch when he knows Denji will be coming home soon so he walks in and sees, or fingering you on the balcony while Denji's eating in the living room and can hear, or leaving the door open when you while you ride him in bed because he know Denji will try to take a peak. Anyways, imagine Aki exerting his power by showing Denji how good he makes you, better than he ever could. 🥴🥴🥴
oh anon.. this is too good.. bless u 😵💫
i had a lot of fun writing this! hope to see more requests from u in the future, anon :3 🖤
warnings- afab reader, denji is lowkey (highkey) a little perv, riding, voyeurism, fondling, nipple play, masturbation, filming, reader doesn't know denji can see them
you and aki were just supposed to be watching a movie together while denji was out of the house for the night. but the way it always goes with him, you ended up sitting on top of your boyfriends lap with your tongue in his mouth. "fuck.. aki.. won't denji be home soon? i don't know if we should be doing this on the couch, don't you just want to go to our bed?" you asked at your boyfriend, a little worried. you didn't want denji to walk in on you and aki having sex, that'd just be so humiliating.
"calm down baby, denji shouldn't be back for at least another hour or two, i got you all to myself.." he cooed into your ear as he started to kiss down your neck. aki hated lying to his sweet girlfriend, but this time, he deemed it necessary. he noticed the way denji always started at you. whether it be your chest, ass, thighs, or face, he always found a way to look at you. aki decided something should be done about it, so he waited patiently for his opportunity. and this one was perfect. he was going to make sure denji saw just how good he made you feel.
aki's hands traveled up your shirt and pawed at your chest. your face flushed a deep red with the combination of the kisses at your neck and aki pinching your nipples. "ki.. please.. i want you inside of me already.. please no more teasing.." you whined desperately to him. "okay baby i hear you, i'm sorry" he falsely apologized to you. you buried your face in his neck and while aki pulled your panties to the side, prepping with his fingers, he heard the faintest sound of keys jingling and the door unlocking. aki smirked and curled his fingers up, causing you to moan loudly. denji heard the sound from outside and slowly walked in the door.
"i.." denji muttered quietly. aki locked eyes with denji and put his finger on his mouth mimicking a "shh" motion. denji was so shocked and embarrassed. he'd liked you ever since aki introduced you to him, and now here you were in front of him, getting fingered by his best friend. he fantasized about seeing you like this every night, was he dreaming? even if he was dreaming he knew one thing for sure, there was a growing aching in his pants.
"think you're ready for my cock now baby? did i stretch you out enough?" aki asked you, still making eye contact with denji. "yes.. yeah please i need you in me so bad ki.. you're always teasing me... nnhgh.." upon your plea, aki reached his hand inside of his sweatpants and pulled out his cock, denji did the same. aki pushed his cock inside your aching pussy, denji pushed his into his fist. aki put both of his hands on your ass and helped you move up and down. "hah.. fuck aki.. it feels so good! please don't stop!" denji stroked his cock at this sight and bit back his moans. he wished he could watch this moment back everyday. wait. he reached into his pocket. fuck. is it okay for him to do this? does he care? "ah! aki fuck, please harder!" no, he doesn't. he pulls out his phone camera and presses record.
fuck, a 25 minute video of a girl he likes getting fucked?
yeah, he's jerking off later.
#csm smut#csm denji#denji csm smut#denji smut#smut#chainsaw man#denji chainsaw man#denji hayakawa#aki hayakawa#aki hayakawa smut#aki smut#sub!reader smut#voyerurism#requests are open#request
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Chapter 2
Masterlist
It’s what I like to call my day off; Anton gives me Sunday so I can rest and enjoy the day. I would love to see his face if he knows that instead of going out, I’m sitting in the living room seeing my little sister Mia struggling to brush her hair while we do our daily video call.
“That’s why you should use a conditioner.” Mia is a diver, even though she has practiced since she was 5 years old, she normally is careless with her hair, she takes a deep care of her body but her hair seems to be in another world. Mia keeps making funny faces as she tries to get the comb out of her hair.
“Auch!”
Liam even getting his keys, he chooses knocks first, waits for a couple of seconds and opens the door.
“Morning, morning.” Liam enters with my new supplies of ice bags, bigger ones.
“What about if…” As he passed to the kitchen leaving the bags in the cooler, he noticed who I’m speaking to. “Oh, hi Mia.”
Mia with a comb stuck in the top of her hair and taking a bite of her sandwich smiles and waves her hand.
“Hi Coach.” Liam smiles and lets us talk.
“Show me, show me.” My hands fake the sound of tambourine on the table, Mia takes out a silver medal under her shirt, she got it this afternoon. “Congratulations! Oh, I would love to be there.”
“I love having you here too, but first you need to recover, I mean, I want the next medal we celebrate be from you, and if I don’t ask too much, a golden one.” Mia is my personal cheerleader and I’m hers, since she was little it was easy to recognize her in my junior competitions for her big pink poster in the crowd.
“Breathe and feel the air in your lungs.” We spoke at the same time, the words our dad always repeated to us when we were so overwhelmed.
Talking about the king of Rome, we hear him shout for her. “I have to go, I’ll call you tomorrow, ok?” Mia smiles before ending the call, still I was able to see her picking her sandwich and running to dad.
“Hey, you have really cleaned the apartment.” Liam is observing the kitchen and the living room, I stand not before grabbing the ice bag one more time and putting it over my shoulder.
“It’s my way to pass my free time.” Liam lends his head and his face turns serious. “Come on Liam! Don’t look at me like that, I go out for groceries… Oh! And I found a really nice place where they prepare delicious french toast.”
He doesn't need to tell me anything just grabs the keys one more time, takes the ice bag from me and drags me out of the apartment.
“Fuck” I whisper lowing my head not before dropping the scapular to the floor. “Sorry, it's just…”
“It’s ok Y/N, it’s a different exercise, take it easy.” This week the towel is left aside and I start to use the scapular, for a scapular stretch. To be honest I try to use scapulars.
“Here.” Liam gave me an ice bag, and lately it became my best friend. The ice bags help to reduce the swelling and minimize the pain, always wrap around a towel. “Let us talk a little, I will make sure to call you for a check up.”
That means they will talk about things I shouldn't hear, yet. So, I grab my bottle of water, my phone and the ice bag with me walking straight to the garden.
“That’s a better hack.” I turn around when I hear Max's voice. My bottle now has a strap avoiding it rolls out of my wrist.
“Oh, yeah, it makes my life easier.” Max nods and points to the chair next to me.
“Can I?” I nod so he can sit. “Are you all right? I mean, the ice bag is not a good sign, right?”
“It’s a small inflammation, I’m ok, thanks for asking.” I don’t want to mention right away anything he probably hears the first two minutes someone mentions when meeting him for the first time.
“You? Are you all right?” My questions take him by surprise but he presses his lips in a smile and nods.
“Just a little bit of physical conditioning.” The silence that follows, he cut it out with a question. “You mention about being ready, what do you mean?”
“Amm, well, there is a competition in a year, but the test begins in 10 months, so if I want to be there, first I need to be in the tests. It's a long story.”
“I love to hear it.” I am getting goosebumps all over my body.
We talked for 40 minutes, in the middle of our talk he already mentioned what he does and his really impressive achievements and his goals, naturally, not trying to brag about just as he’s telling his day by day.
I felt comfortable talking with him about my goals too, how I terribly miss grabbing a bow and shooting arrows over a field, even allowing myself to tell him things I usually don't tell anyone who I just meet.
“Y/N, ready?” Liam appears in the crystal doors with my bag over his shoulder and his in the other one.
“I have to go, thanks for listening to me.” The ice bag stops being ice now just a liquid gel forgotten in my lap.
“Please, thanks for hearing me too, Y/N” Max stands with me, however he remains in the garden as I walk where Liam is waiting for me.
“Ready.” I plan to take my bag but he moves faster and takes it out of my hands. “Is everything alright?”
Liam smiles and puts his hand carefully over my right arm. “Just good thighs, just good things. So…”
“HEY Y/N!” Max shouts at me. I don’t know if Liam recognizes Max or he is pretending not.
“I’ll wait for you outside.” Let me alone so Max can reach me.
“It’s ok if I… well… If I talk with you when we meet here, you know, just a simple talk.”
“Are you really asking me if you can talk with me?” Eyes hide just a little bit between his eyelids, smiling.
Can it be cuter?
“I mean, I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable around me.” He jokes, making me laugh.
“I'm already feeling the pressure.”
Max’s smile is contagious, now I know that.
That's how our small talk happens every time we meet in the center, varying each one of them; sometimes long, sometimes short but each time I get something meaningful from him and I give him something meaningful from me.
“That's nice! Well done Y/N.” My exercises of internal rotation have been pretty well, the swelling slowly decreases; Anton hopes in a few weeks, we will introduce advanced ones.
A soft knock on the door calls for our attention, one of the nurses of the center told us she has an envelope for me.
Mia has been sending me photos, not for email, not for a message, a palpable ones; for at least I make the apartment look a little bit like home.
“I have to fill some papers, I’ll wait in the reception.” By the time Liam ends that phrase leaving the room with Anton, the third beep of the call I made was interrupted.
“What about if instead of a boring Sunday shut in your four walls you spend a full package all included for a F1 race?” The train tickets, the name tag with my photo, and a strange brochure from 3 different restaurants are in my hand.
“Max, I really, really appreciate it…” He won’t let me reject him so easily.
“No, no, wait, let me finish, have you ever been in a F1 race?”
..............................................................................................................................
Thank you so much for reading.♥️
#fic#max verstappen#max verstappen x reader#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 x female reader#max verstappen imagine
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MHA chapter 423 rant
Ok so this is later than usual and Iam not going to be as active as I want to be due to exams😭 (chemistry is going to kill me tomorrow)
Anyway this chapter was a flipping mess to me and Iam not liking some of the takes Iam seeing like someone somehow blaming izuku for shigarakis death like??!?!!?
Again the lack of izuku intropsection is annoying me. Seriously Izuku please think I wanna see your thought process what's going on behind what you're doing. Like at this point I feel so distant from the MC I can't understand why he is doing anything and everything seems so ooc or in character it's annoying and confusing. Like he pities AFO? What does he think of Shigaraki? Is he not upset that he couldn't save shigaraki? What does he feel about losing his quirk and all? So much we don't know that we should know 😔
Shigaraki is dead so that's it?!?! Also can we talk about how random his last words are. I hated it 😭. I guess Iam glad shigaraki is dead so hori can't ruin him even more but dam that was such a horrible way for him to go. Also why were his last words towards spinner out of all people? Like the manga hasn't really given us a clear focus on their relationship just a few moments here and there. Also, I would of liked for shigaraki to at least say thanks to izuku or something like that. I don't know but all of this felt empty and if hori does somehow decide to bring Shigaraki back which I doubt it, it would be worse. Ok but like I low-key love seeing the OFA vestiges also punch AFO in shigarakis side
Still hated how this fight went and bakugo just had to make an entrance. I have already voiced my opinions here but due to the lack of build up and development between Izuku and other characters the whole fight where they come fighting with him feels empty as hell. It just felt like a cheap and quick way for everyone to get their moments and don't get me on bakugo making another comeback like Iam sick of seeing him truly Iam. He had his moment can hori not leave him to rest?
I didn't care for AFO. I think he should of been dead long ago. I think I have also made it clear that I don't like the way AFO is written. He had potential and I genuinely love the analysis that his fans give him but I don't like him at all especially because to me the plot revolves around him in such an aggravating way that it makes it so that the root of all evil and problems is due to AFO. Like ok cool afo is dead and with yoichi but shouldn't and couldn't help for just done that himself? Like I simply can't seem to comprehend the main villain of the story being like this
Rip kurogiri for caring way too much about shigaraki just for him to not care about you at all.
Also extra rip for izuku because he couldn't save the one person he wanted to and gran Torino was right shigaraki should of been killed and all of this would if been avoided at this point
#mha critical#bnha critical#mha#hori is a bad writer#horikoshi critical#izuku deserves better#bhna critical#bnha#anti bakugou#anti bakugo katsuki#anti bakugou katsuki
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Ok so Buddy can somehow be in all the books Chase enters
Which, according to silver should not be possible
But he somehow is always there
Also like about the last chapter, I mean we're not sure what role he got, but I kind of feel like he got the sister's? That's the obvious answer?
And I feel like he's been there a while, so probably since the beginning of the book
Like look at him he looks like he lives in the jungle
He threw a spear at Chase
And still wears useless belts
So he's been there while chase hasn't
Also I remember chase telling him about "the Shortcut" he found with the bookmarks and Buddy being like YOU CANT DO THAT
And like, if he's there since the beginning, how did he not notice chase just appearing randomly near the end?
Also wait, this is random, but wasn't his first appearance with him chilling on a tree? What's the villainess doing on a tree 😭 he's just a cat
Anyway
I remember seeing somewhere that theory that Buddy is Violet, and perhaps trans, hence being a guy in the stories while they key as far as we know is a girl
Which um could explain why he is everywhere I guess? If he is the villainess
Hm also his color palette, his main outfit is purple
And kinda outdated I guess?
We've also never seen him leave or enter the book, he's just there
The only thing that makes me believe he's not a key is that he referred to the keys as "it" while Chase uses the correct pronouns of the keys, he views them as people whereas Buddy called them "it" cause he views them as objects
And yet, he's on a talking stage with Violet since she gives him outfits
And freaking awesome outfits at that
(Unless, as someone else said they have a bad relationship and he goes out of his way to make his own outfits just to prove chase wrong)
...
Honestly I don't think I'm going somewhere with this post I'm just pointing out stuff
And Punko said on her live yesterday that she can't spoil his name cause it'd be much better when we find out on our own
So like
His name means something?
Or like I guess she has a good scene planned or something like that and doesn't want to spoil it which makes sense
If he's trans violet I'm guessing his boy name is Victor 🤓☝️ I couldn't sleep some days ago and thought about a whole plot with Victor and he and chase had a somehow tragic ending
I can't wait to find out more about him
How is he in every book
What is his purpose
Why
What is his name
Hm wait okok
New theory what if he's trapped
He somehow is trapped into book world
And maybe cause a kid disappeared ex libris kinda broke up
But he doesn't know and just tries to leave, or do whatever it was he was supposed to be doing
So he just shows up into whatever book the hero/ine characters chose
Like c'mon chase found the key at a random library and Buddy is like you stole the key!! C'mon dude I don't think ex libris had that one
And like he then found 2 other keys on yard sale c'mon
Shouldn't these guys know what's up
How do you lose keys you don't let out
Something has happened
Oh god can't wait for more lore
#i should sleep i have a flight tomorrow wtf am i doing#Cinderella boy webtoon#buddy cinderella boy#Cinderella boy buddy#stargoth#punko#webtoon#Cinderella boy
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ok lol officially most annoying anon in the world (“mischaracterization” anon who just said they were abdicating from the convo 4 being high as balls which. is real and i should stop cuz atp im p sure the whole point of what ur getting at is going over my head lmfao) BUT in terms of what u said u were getting at in ur poll (like if the writers were cognizant of it or if it’s more a display of their own internal biases? again im stupid and high sorry if im once again missing the point by a mile)… BUT
I don’t have any strong inclinations either way but if I had to choose I’d have to say it’s more their own internal/personal bias’s coming out rather than something they were expecting the audience to pick up on and maybe think about. And the only reason I say this is because the identities/status of the people she killed were never really explicitly stated (at least from what i can immediately recall of the episodes) or brought up again.
like it’s notttt rlly brought up throughout the episode aside from just learning that those people are dead and she killed them? like idk nothing about it rlly inclines me to believe it was anything more than subconscious or latent beliefs in the writers because I do think we were supposed to empathize with her so it does make sense in that sort of lens that the writers chose “criminals” or whatever to kinda “soften the blow”, if u will, of her having killed people?
idk. i wanna know what what u think tho!!! like in terms of the poll u posted what would ur answer be?
I have mixed feelings about it, because I think the previous associations the writers have made with Sam and class (as well as Dean and class—for example—in 2.20 "What Is And What Should Never Be") make it very possible it's intentional. Sam justifies Amy's actions partly based on class, and Dean condemns her actions partly for the same reason—that she doesn't get to kill people and get away with it just because they're beneath her on the social ladder. It seems so obvious that one wants to assume it's very intentionally and purposefully done.
At the same time, you are right that the presentation of the story—told through the mouth of a cop and a few newspaper clippings—is heavily biased against the victims. The cop says the third victim deserved it because he had been in and out of jail for petty offenses, and Sam calls him a "low life". You have to work very hard to capture the story of the second victim in the newspaper article. You really can't capture the story on those pages without really sitting down to read, paused on the correct frames. A prominent part of the article is focusing on the victim being a heroin addict who had relapsed and was high when he went to the park. He was vulnerable and "in the wrong place at the wrong time". What gets me the most though is the prominent headline for the first victim: "Body found in park, victim known to police". What a gross way to poison the well. The barely visible subheading reads: "Man had been arrested multiple times, had outstanding warrant". (Again—these multiple arrests indicate petty offenses rather than felonies—probably another addict). When Amy makes an attempt on another victim in the park (only to be stopped by Sam), the target is drunk and fumbling with his keys, trying to get into his locked car. So in every case, the presentation not just from Amy and Sam and the cop but the episode as a whole attempts to bias the audience against the victims, trying to paint them as people who shouldn't be missed, who deserved what they got, and/or whose vulnerability was to blame for what happened to them.
Amy seems to target people who are high or drunk in the park at night because they're vulnerable and alone. I think some fans jump to frame her choice of targets as vigilantism that helps assuage her guilt, but none of those people deserved to die—and it really isn't vigilantism—she's simply following her own mother's shrewd M.O.—you target people who are alone and whose situational awareness is impeded by substances and whose deaths the cops won't put much effort into investigating because they don't see them as victims.
I also think this episode tries very hard to paint Dean in a negative light even prior to him killing Amy. Bobby insists Dean's concern over Sam's well-being isn't warranted when it is perfectly warranted. (We've seen Bobby brush off Dean's reasonable concerns before in 6.06). Then Sam pops off, cutting Dean off to throw a bunch of nonsense in his mouth, and conflating himself with Amy in an absolutely ridiculous way. Dean's voice is suppressed (which is also imo—a prominent feature of the Dabb era in general later in the series). On top of that, this certainly isn't the only episode where Dabb and Loflin's most overt messages try to bias the audience against Dean.
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Could you please write an imagine where Pedro and reader know each other for a very long time and reader comes from a not so happy family (unlike Pedro)
He’s in love with her and she does love him but does believe love is real or that relationships can last (thinking everyone only wants her for her body from past flings) and can’t give him a chance due to fear
Happy ending if you want
Thanks
warnings: angst, and brief talk about reader's bad childhood
a/n: im starting to honestly think yall should start writing fics, cause the shit you come up with is so good like
The first time you told him you were 13.
You had showed up at his doorsteps asking for a place to sleep.
You couldn't stand another minute of hearing your parents scream at each other two doors down.
They hadn't even noticed you were gone, they never did.
He was your only real friend at the time, and after a sort of awkward moment with his parents, he'd led you to his room and asked what had happened.
And that's the first time he heard the sentence he'd grow to hate.
"Love isn't real. It never lasts"
Your parents were the proof. Love is a trap, it deceives you into thinking you can spend your life with someone, when really, all you're doing is locking yourself into a cage, and when you finally realize what you've done, it will be too late, because then you'll be scared to get out, to start new, and that's why you'll stay, forever imprisoned because your own stupid choices.
From then on, it became your mantra.
With every guy who disappeared after having gotten you into bed, with every guy who dumped you as soon as they'd seen what's underneath your clothes, one sentence engraved itself in your mind.
Love isn't real. Love isn't real. Love isn't real.
And that's why, he, of all people, knew better than anyone why he shouldn't tell you, why he should continue pretending like he'd been doing for almost twenty years,
Maybe he was a masochist, or maybe his feelings were getting too strong and they had started to fog his brain, but he couldn't hold it in anymore, he'd kept it hidden for too long, and no matter how many women he'd meet there was always you in the back of his mind.
It had always been you.
And that's why tonight... tonight he had finally let go.
"Y/n, I love you"
He saw you freeze before his eyes, shocked and terrified of the words that had just come out of his mouth.
"I'm sorry" he murmured, swiping his sweaty hands on his jeans and looking around your living room to try and gather some composure. "I'm sorry to drop this on you like this. I know how you feel about the whole... love thing" he winced internally as his eyes set anywhere but on yours "And- and I don't want to ruin our friendship, and it's ok if you don't feel the same way, but..." He swallowed what felt like sand in his mouth as he finally looked into your eyes "Y/n I've felt this way for so fucking long" he breathed "I-I think I was too young to understand it when we met, but as we grew up it just became clearer and clearer and... and I couldn't do it anymore, I couldn't keep it to myself anymore y/n, I'm sorry"
His words felt distant, muffled.
You felt like you were drowning and he was trying to talk to you from above the water.
He'd just told you the three words you dreaded most in the world, and now you didn't know what to do, or say, or even think.
And it wasn't the same as when any of your old boyfriends had said it, no, with him, with Pedro, those words scared you because they meant so much more,
because they reached into that deep, hidden part of you that... that felt the same way.
And that part of you was hidden for a reason, that part of you was the only thing that prevented you from becoming like your mom, from falling into the trap.
And now he'd just handed you the keys, and all you needed to do was decide to open the lock.
And you didn't know if you wanted to.
"I don't want to lose you y/n, the last thing I want is to lose you, you- you're the most important person in my life, I-I'd be lost without you, so if you don't feel the same way, it's fine, I promise it's fine, I can take it, but before you say anything I just want you to know that when I say I love you I mean it," Both your hearts were beating faster than they'd ever beaten before"I mean I love every single part of you, every single inch, that I love you when you sing off-tune and I love you when you call me in the middle of the night" he laughed "That- that I wake up and go to sleep thinking of you- that without you I wouldn't know how to breathe, that since I met you, I felt the need to become a better person so that maybe I'd deserve you." he said more softly now "And I'm sorry about your parents, and I'm sorry about everything that happened in your life, but I promise you that I'd never do anything to hurt you, that if you just give me a chance, I'll try my hardest to prove to you that love is real, that- that it can last if you just give it a try"
The soft roar of an engine made its way to your ears as a car drove by outside, the fabric of the couch felt itchy all of a sudden, and your breathing had become uneven.
You didn't know how long you both stayed silent, how long it took you to take in all he had just said, but when you finally opened your mouth, your voice didn't sound like your own.
"Pedro-" his eyes were filled with hope, but yours only with pain "Pedro you know how I feel about this" you murmured, like doctors did just as they delivered bad news "I'm sorry I- I can't do this, you know I can't... I just-" there was this feeling in your stomach, like all your organs were twisting, like your body was telling you you were making a mistake "I don't want to lose you, and I know that if we did... this, it would only end badly" you watched all the hope in his eyes crumble and you didn't think you'd ever hated yourself more than in that exact moment.
"I'm sorry Pedro," you said "I can't"
He didn't look like himself anymore, he didn't feel like it either. He felt as if all the life had left his body, and all that remained was a useless sack of skin.
But still, still, he couldn't help but realize that you hadn't said one thing, the one thing that was gonna make him give up forever.
"So you don't feel the same way?"
It wasn't tears threatening to spill from your eyes, it was liquid pain, liquid hatred for yourself.
"T-that doesn't matter"
He frowned, trying to come up with something to say that wouldn't make him sound any more pathetic than he already was.
"B-but it does y/n. it does"
You swallowed thickly "Pedro, please" you begged
"I need to know," he said with a thread of voice
"I-I can't" you murmured, as a tear finally stained your cheek "I..."
He took that as his answer.
You didn't love him, and deep down, he'd always known.
"I think-" he cleared his throat to try and gain some composure, "I think it's best if I go," he said as he stood up.
you didn't know if you nodded, you didn't know anything anymore
He glanced back at you for a moment to see if there was any sign of you wanting to stop him, but your head was down.
both of your hearts broke with each step he took, and as he got farther and farther, this... feeling spread inside your body, this presentiment of having just made the biggest mistake of your life sneaked up your throat and robbed you of all oxygen.
And was only when his fingers grabbed the doorknob, and you grasped his arm, that you could breathe again.
"y/n-" he tried to speak, but you needed to do this before your mind could catch up, so you cut him off.
"I do," you said, as more tears fell from your eyes "I love you, Pedro"
His mind was a mess and his heart was a mess but he still managed to spit out a sentence
"Y/n, if you're saying that just because-"
"Pedro" you softly placed your hands on each side of his head, as you huffed out a silly laugh "Just kiss me"
#pedro pascal x reader#pedro pascal blurb#pedro pascal fluff#pedro pascal x fem reader#pedro pascal one shot#pedro pascal fic#pedro pascal smut#pedro pascal x female reader#Pedro Pascal#pedro pascal fanfic#pedro pascal fanfiction#pedro pascal imagine#the last of us#joel miller#tlou#the mandalorian#javier peña#pedro pascal x you#pedro pascal x y/n#fluff#daddy pascal#pedrohub#jose pedro balmaceda pascal#pedrito
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i cant watch the tsunami eps 😭 ive only watched it once and then skipped one or both eps on the 2nd rewatch. it was so stressful!!!! i knew christopher was gonna be ok - the joys of watching the whole show years after the air dates - but it was still so fucking stressful!
however in revisiting the source material (3x01):
i literally *just* realised bobby was lying through his teeth telling buck that "chief alonso" and "the department" are concerned about "liability issues" - not that he was wrong to be worried because buck was cleared and recertified and then he coughed up blood and passed out and what he said that the doctors don't know what's causing the clots + buck being on blood thinners = yeah, you shouldn't be putting yourself in risky situations. which. is the whole job.
and i also just realised buck quit because bobby said he would only ever be cleared for light duty. i honestly thought buck was wrong to quit instead of waiting until his health issues got sorted. even if it had already been 5 months since has was on medical leave. see aforementioned coughing up blood and passing out. but bobby wanting to bench him FOREVER? because of *his* own personal issues? real "i made a mistake so im putting my kid under lock and key so they dont make the mistake" energy of overprotective parents.
and you know what you could do if you believe your subordinate and/or "son" is putting too much focus on his job and not enough on outside-of-work life? send him to ✨ counselling ✨ (hey, he has the authority to issue department mandated therapy like he did for eddie in s5, no?) go learn all about work life balance, buck. so. big L for bobby, tbh. maybe he should go to some self-mandated counselling too, huh?
AND THEN. BUCK SURVIVES A WHOLE ASS TSUNAMI. SAVES HIMSELF + KEEPS CHRISTOPHER SAFE (before the second wave hits iirc?) + SAVES A BUNCH OF OTHER PEOPLE. and bobby sees all that and still doesn't budge? like. he's clearly alright.
speaking of people too lost in their own issues to sympathise with buck who's going through a fucking rough period: *side eyes eddie* (even though dragging buck out of bed and sending him off with christopher is one of the most genius moves. need me a freak like that when im in the depression pit 😔) (but then saying "[christopher] never feels sorry for himself" eddie im gonna bonk you on the head with a newspaper)
i don't understand how i missed a lot of these little details. i feel like i definitely sympathise with buck a lot more now. he was basically told that his options are desk duty or nothing? instead of "desk duty until you are cleared by the doctors" which is obviously necessary for new symptoms. and the fact that someone he trusts so much was responsible for the fact that he lost his job. that would have hurt.
#send post#your leg gets crushed under a fire engine and then your girlfriend dumps you and then you lose your job#yeah i would have microwaved forks and knives too tbh#evan buckley#my beloved 🥺#my meta
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What your favourite Doctor says about you (just like the Master and Companion lists, this is all just jokes and my own terrible takes, absolutely no offence intended towards anyone). This is gonna be a long one, so good luck:
One (I think):
Is somehow able to sit through The Keys of Marinus whilst completely sober. Their feelings on Twice Upon a Time completely depend on whether they are able to accept that TV shows made in the 1960s will inevitably have some outdated bits or not. Loves slow-burners and less science-heavy stories, and wishes the Doctor would go back to trolling his companions again. Prays every night for The Celestial Toymaker and Marco Polo to be found. Hates the Timeless Child with a burning passion.
Two:
Two fans deserve a lot better. Despite a large chunk of their era being limited to surviving audio, PowerPoint presentations telesnaps and the, er, mixed bag of animated reconstructions, they still contribute a lot to the discussion of Classic Who and are usually well versed in the lore of the EU. 2nd Doctor fans are remarkable, as they are able to get along with pretty much every other group of fans. However, there is plenty of infighting thanks to the UNIT dating controversy and which story should be reconstructed next. If they ship Two/Jamie, they have fully earned your love and are surprisingly good if you pass them the aux.
Three:
Pretty much blows a gasket whenever some idiot says that the modern era is 'too political'. Like, I'm sorry, but was the "England for the English" scene in the Claws of Axos a little too subtle for you? Were Malcolm Hulke's scripts absolutely apolitical in your eyes? Does the mere existence of The Green Death mean nothing to you?! Oh, well maybe you should try WATCHING THE SHOW and DOING YOUR RESEARCH before you start claiming that it's become 'tOo pOLiTiCaL' because the main characters aren't always played by Whiteguy McStraight now, shouldn't you?! YOU AND YOUR MEDIOCRE OPINION SHALL COWER BEFORE MY KNOWLEDGE OF THE THIRD DOCTOR'S ERA AND THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO TO STOP ME!
It is for this very reason that 3rd Doctor fans get along particularly well with 13th Doctor fans. Perfectly nice people with a great sense of humour and an excellent taste in episodes, unless a conversation resembling the above occurs, at which point you will see how much damage the repressed urge to do Venusian Akido can do. Refuses to admit that The Ambassadors of Death is two episodes too long.
Four:
Either a child of the 70s or chaos incarnate. Yes, 4 is pretty much the universally recognised Doctor, but that doesn't stop him from being one of the most unhinged Doctors. Loves more gothic horror-themed episodes and can ignore the somewhat questionable production qualities of early Baker stories. They have almost certainly attempted to make The Scarf at one point; whether they were successful or not entirely depends on their talent for knitting. Is surprisingly ok with admitting that Tom Baker stayed for a little too long and that his later seasons were a little underwhelming. Hasn't stopped them from watching every version of Shada though.
Five:
The tired parental figure of any group they are in. They immediately related to this Doctor when they saw 5 trying to hold it together whilst his multiple adopted humans argued, whined and got themselves trapped on doomed freighter ships. Has tried to play cricket once, but a general confusion over the rules and a few broken windows stopped that. You can take care of the cinnamon roll that is the standard 5 fan by providing them with cups of tea, giving them lots of hugs and removing all copies of Time Flight from your house.
Six:
Best fashion sense out of all the fans... somehow. Their favourite episodes are usually Vengeance on Varos or Revelation of the Daleks (both bangers), although they lean more heavily towards EU and Big Finish material, where the stories are more consistent and the costumes are less yikes. Either the best or worst fan to be around, either giving fair balanced views on the show or just being an absolute arse. Loves cats. Hates Michael Grade. Kind of ambivalent towards Mel.
Seven:
If 2nd Doctor fans are well versed in the EU lore, then these individuals are fucking academics. Constantly annoyed that 7 had two of the best seasons of Classic Who and was the darkest Doctor but is only remembered for Time and the Rani for some reason. Their favourite companion will always be Ace, which is what motivated them to watch Power of the Doctor. Usually excellent taste in stories, but is completely capable of dragging you to the depths of the EU. Wishes the Doctor would commit a few more genocides. Their religious beliefs can be summarised in the phrase "Cartmel Master Plan". Still annoyed that the most strategic Doctor was killed by the two most American things (guns and bad healthcare), but gets along well with 8 fans despite that. Somehow understands Ghost Light after just 3 rewatches.
Eight:
Big Finish fan. Basically willing to explain the entire plot of Dark Eyes if you ask them. Thinks the TV Movie is just OK, and has rewatched Night of the Doctor too many times to count. Loves a sad boy, and has definitely referred to 8 as a "poor little meow meow" at some point. Wishes 8's TARDIS interior was still intact and that he'll get his own live action series. Had an actual heart attack when he appeared in Power of the Doctor. Usually a bisexual from my personal experience, and looking at Paul McGann in the 90s, I can see why.
War (or is it Nine?):
We're stepping into the depths of the Moffat cult with this one. Wants a more traumatised Doctor, and kind of wishes we saw more of the Time War beyond the laser battle in Day of the Doctor. Content to sit back and watch due to the fact that the War Doctor had the perfect arc in his one episode, although they are happy that the War Doctor still pops up in the EU. Bridging the gap between the modern and classic series means they get along well with everyone except Shalka fans.
Nine (the Curse of Fatal Death one):
Does this one count? Just loves the classic series. Still praying for Joanna Lumley as the Doctor. Nowhere near as obnoxious as the Shalka fans and surprisingly funny.
Nine (the Scream of the Shalka one):
They pride themselves on being 'against the trend' and being fans of an overlooked bit of Doctor Who history. Doesn't quite realise that Scream of the Shalka was basically an B-tier Big Finish story with janky animation. Wants Richard E Grant to show up again. Constantly attempting to upset Eccleston and Hurt fans, only to get angry when everyone forgets Scream of the Shalka existed. They definitely listen to Weezer.
Ten, no, another Nine (the Eccleston one):
The word "fantastic" is permanently superglued to their vocabulary, and yet it never gets old. Owns a leather jacket too. Wishes that the BBC hadn't been stupid and Eccleston had stayed on for another series, but doesn't hold it against Tennant. Knows the Daleks were at their best in S1. Really wants the Reapers to return, and was utterly distraught after Chibs kind of ruined 9's role in the wider arc by blowing up Gallifrey again. Major nostalgia for the 2000s with this one, and is slowly becoming a member of the Big Finish cult thanks to Eccleston's return. Understandably forgot Adam was a thing. Both loves and hates John Barrowman.
Ten? Eleven? Ten and a half? The Tennant one. I hate numbers:
Their first experience to Doctor Who was during the golden age- wait, no, sorry, the RTD cult has threatened to terminate my membership if I'm not honest with this one.
Either a child of the 2000s, a member of the aforementioned RTD cult or someone who just likes the show to be more emotionally resonant. Well, that or they are the blandest person alive. If they acknowledge how good 10's arc was in terms of deconstructing the Doctor and setting up his fall from grace via misplaced attachments and vanity, then absolutely someone to be around. If they simply say "because he was popular", definitely bland. We all know Tennant was popular, it's still not one of the many valid reasons to love him. They have an easygoing relationship with 4 and 11 fans, and otherwise OK relations with the rest of Doctors fan groups, although there is a bit of friction between 13 stans due to 10 being dragged into a lot of 13's media post-2020 to boost ratings. They didn't like it because it cheapned 10's return and era whilst also overshadowing 13. 13 stans didn't like it because it basically gave the message that the BBC had given up on 13 before her era had finished.
Definitely excited for the 60th after the regeneration and the announcement of RTD's return. Has tried owning a pair of converses, only to find out that they aren't exactly cheap. Has fought for the Ten/Rose ship on multiple occasions. Tried hair gel once, with disastrous consequences.
Huh. This one was incredibly easy to write. All I had to do was look in a mirror.
Thirte- no, Eleven:
Major ADHD energy in the best possible way. Saw the chaotic excitable Doctor and immediately fell in love. They will not rest until they have forced every former Doctor to read the "Hello Stonehenge" speech. They have also cosplayed the most out of any fan, due to the availability of fezzes and bow ties. Definitely the most fun to be around at a party. Was disappointed by Matt Smith's decision not to return for the 60th, especially after the absolute banger that was Day of the Doctor. If they ship 11 with River, they're cool, even though 11 was very asexual in S5. If they ship him with anyone else, then yikes. Wishes for the show to return to a quirky fairytale tone again.
If they were present during the SuperWhoLock days, keep an eye on them. You're only one drink away from dragging us back to 2013, and I ain't reading any of that fanfiction again *shudders*.
Fourte- FUCK, Twelve:
A certified member of the Steven Moffat cult, or just someone who likes some of their stories to have a slightly more mature tone. Has tried to play the electric guitar more than once, only to be forced to stop by their partners or housemates. Either willing to admit some of the flaws of the era or strongly defends it, with no inbetween. Absolutely correct in their assertion that S9 and 10 absolutely slapped, although this cam be undermined if they try to defend Sleep No More. If they ship River and 12, then you can trust them with anything, and they will offer you good relationship advice. If they ship 12 and Clara in a romantic way (which is strange to me cos i always got platonic BFF vibes from them, but that's just me), they definitely have relationship advice, although waiting 4 billion years to get your memory wiped is a questionable means of resolving conflict. They have a pair of the sonic sunglasses. Cried when Capaldis majestic floofy hair got shaved off for a superhero film.
Thirteen? That's right? Phew, finally getting the hang of this. Ok, Thirteen:
There are two types of 13 fan. The first is cinnamoniest of rolls. Is just happy to sit back and have fun, thus allowing them to enjoy pretty much any episode (something that a lot of people could learn from). Immediately realised that Jodie is an amazing Doctor and deserves more praise and justice. Definitely shipped Thasmin, and are the best at constructive criticism, recognising what worked and didn't in a respectful, polite way (again, something we could all learn from). Wierdly enough, they get along well with all the Doctor fans, as they are a wholesome ray of sunshine that reminds us that every era has something to offer, no matter the general consensus.
The second type masquerades as the first, but gets all hipster-y and more than willing to use the term 'overrated' when RTD or Tennant are mentioned (so basically a healthy 80% of the #antiRTD tag).
Both are convinced that the Chibnall Era will receive a massive reappraisal like the 12th Doctor's era did, despite the odds of that happening being the same as an on-screen Thasmin kiss. I'm so sorry, that's a really mean line to end this bit on. Let's instead end by saying Haunting of Villa Diodati is an absolute banger of an episode.
Ruth:
Loves the admittedly cool concept of a mystery incarnation. The rest depends on their theory of where the Ruth Doctor fits in. If they use the season 6B theory, then they have an encyclopedic knowledge of the classical series and the EU regardless of whether they have watched it or not. If they use the Timeless Child/Division theory, then they basically settled for the easier version of 6B after looking into the insane asylum that is classic who and EU discourse (wise choice). If they think she's from an alternative universe, thinks that she's Omega, Rassilon, The Rani, The Master or any other figure, then they practically have a gold medal in Mental Gymnastics. Either way, all of them don't like to admit that they are unfortunately limited to 4 episodes (three of them being fairly mid, the other being a mild car crash) and a pretty good comic. Cool fashion taste. Gets along with 13 stans and, surprisingly, 2nd Doctor fans.
Fourteen- oh for fucks sake:
YOU ARE TENTH DOCTOR FANS. GO BACK TO EARLIER ON IN THE POST. YES, I KNOW THAT'S THE BBC'S OFFICIAL LINE AT THE MOMENT. YES, I KNOW YOU'RE HYPED FOR THE 60TH, I AM A HYPED RTD CULTIST TOO. JUST WAIT UNTIL SEPTEMBER. P L E A S E.
Fourt- no fifteen- no, fourteen- BBC, HAVE MERCY:
Only in the Doctor Who fandom can a Doctor who has only appeared in a brief clip and some photos have a fully developed fanbase. I should know, I've already joined it. Ncuti's photos in that suit sealed the deal. Either an RTD cultist or someone just looking forward to a fresh new direction. Also very fashionable. Has a somewhat complicated relationship with 13th Doctor fans due to the fact that Ncuti's first season and casting completely overshadowed S13 and the specials, but Ncuti also had to deal with the same levels of toxicity from the same 'fans' who threw temper tantrums at Jodie's casting in 2017. Best haircuts out of all the Doctor Who fans. Strange but true.
Full Fathom Five:
Y'all scare me.
Zagreus:
Y'all terrify me.
The Watcher:
Y'all confuse me.
The Valeyard:
Has wanted a darker series since god knows when. Was kind of annoyed when the Time Lord Victorious arc wasn't dedicated to a whole series. Also, the Valeyard is the Shadow the Hedgehog of the Whoniverse. I refuse to elaborate any further.
The Curator:
"Alright gang, let's see who the Curator fans really are!"
Pulls off mask
"Fourth Doctor fans?!"
All jokes aside, they just want a more experienced Doctor. Accepts that the show will have to end one day, and is cool with that, since they already have the perfect ending. Either cool grandad vibes or an actual grandad. Good knitwear. Their response to everything is simply putting the kettle on.
Doctor Moon:
Now these ones are very, very rare. I personally love the theory that Doctor Moon is a future version of the Doctor who is keeping River and the Library safe, but limiting your favourite Doctor to two episodes and an endorsement of the theory from Steven Moffat? Now that takes guts, and I like it. Usually partial to classy clothes, and talks in a very formal tone. Their best subject is usually maths.
Dr Who (Peter Cushing):
Unashamedly insane. Saw the absolutely glorious cheese-fest that was the 1960s Dalek movies and ended up loving one of the most unique versions of the Doctor. Is absolutely fine with bypassing 90% of the TV shows lore, making them really fun to talk to. Time Lords? Nah. Sonic screwdriver? Nope. Their Doctor is a wacky grandpa who built a multi-dimensional time machine in their back garden, and they love it. Is a sucker for Alternate Universe stories and usually loves classic B-movies. Knows that the movies kind of suck as adaptations, but as pure 1960s camp, they are unbeatable. Absolute legends.
All of Them:
The glue that holds this fanbase together. Enlightened individuals who have to check in every now and then to make sure that we mere mortals are behaving ourselves. They just simply enjoy the show and hold no biases. Absolutely infuriating to talk to for that very reason.
#doctor who#1st doctor#2nd doctor#3rd doctor#4th doctor#5th doctor#6th doctor#7th doctor#8th doctor#9th doctor#10th doctor#11th doctor#12th doctor#13th doctor#14th doctor#15th doctor#war doctor#rtd#moffat era#chibnall era#classic dw#nu who#doctor who eu#doctor who meta#doctor who funny#dr who and the daleks#doccy who#doctor who 60th anniversary#ruth doctor#fugitive doctor
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"Neytiri is such a hypocrite! She hates Spider for being human but Jake is a human too!!!" except that Jake's and Spider's situations and how they relate to Neytiri's are completely different though
Neytiri taught Na'vi culture to Jake personally and was there to watch first-hand as his perspective changed and he gradually fell in love with Pandora and the Omatikaya people. And being able to watch that process, having a level of personal investment in it as his teacher, was a major factor in her falling in love with him in the first place.
Neytiri didn't simply "fall in love with a human", not really. She fell in love with a human who in her eyes became Na'vi, and that part is significant.
I don't think Neytiri really views Jake as a human, not anymore. Though she knew it existed, she never actually saw Jake's human body until the final battle in A1--well after she'd already fully established her relationship with him in his avatar body--and even after that she probably didn't spend much time with him in human form because he permanently transferred to his avatar body shortly thereafter. She's still aware that he was born human of course, but as of the end of A1, despite the eyebrows and extra fingers, Jake is throughly Na'vi as far as Neytiri is concerned, and she watched him get there every step of the way.
She just doesn't have that experience with Spider (at least, not yet--we'll come back to that).
"Well, she SHOULD'VE taught Spider like she taught Jake!! Why didn't she??!"
Why should she?
Remember that she wasn't particularly jazzed about teaching Jake at first either. She didn't volunteer for the position, she only did it because Mo'at explicitly ordered her to. No one's assigned her to teach Spider like that. She's got enough to do during the day with her regular clan duties and raising her own four children; why, exactly, should we expect her to go way out of her way to take enough special interest in Spider, someone whose presence she's kinda iffy about to begin with, to teach him the ins and outs of Na'vi culture like she did for Jake?
"Well, she shouldn't have been iffy with his presence at all!! That's not fair!"
Ok, let's back up a bit. Hear me out before you start yelling.
Neytiri has been through a ridiculous amount of serious traumas in her life, most if not all of which have come at the hands of humans. She witnessed/experienced firsthand:
her sister getting shot and killed.
the Tree of Voices getting bulldozed, an incredible sacred location to her culture where she and other clan members could come to commune with their ancestors, including her now-dead sister.
her ancestral home being brutally destroyed, killing many more of her clanmates in the process.
her father dying in the aftermath of the destruction.
Seze, meant to be a lifelong partnership, getting shot and killed while Neytiri was connected through tsaheylu, meaning she probably experienced not only the heartache of loosing her ikran companion but also the physical pain of the bullet
...yeah, is it really any wonder she feels kinda iffy about humans? And Spider specifically has the added factor of being the son of not just any random human solider but of Quaritch, whom Neytiri had personal beef with.
Now, is it fair to Spider to be judged for the sins of his father and/or species? Of course not. Spider is an innocent party, and has done nothing wrong.
But is it unreasonable, based on everything she's been through, for Neytiri to look at Spider and be reminded of Quaritch etc., and to be uncomfortable with that? Not really, I don't think, and if we could stop demonizing her for it that'd be great.
No, Spider does not "deserve" Neytiri disliking him. But expecting Neytiri to quickly, nigh-magically just get over all of her human-inflicted trauma in order to love or even like Spider right away is a lot.
Key words: right away. Because guys, I think we're forgetting here that these character's stories are not over yet. We're on movie 2 out of 5. That's not even HALFWAY through the story!!
Yes, Neytiri still has issues she needs to work through, areas where she still needs to grow--of COURSE she does, because her story is not over. If she, or the other characters, were already perfect, there would be no story left to tell--or at least, not a very interesting one. Characters need room to grow, otherwise they become boring (isn't that the whole problem with the dreaded "Mary Sue"?)
Same with Spider, his story is not over yet. He and Neytiri still have PLENTY of time to work things out and develop their relationship, among other things, however they need to.
And I do think that their relationship is something that will be explored and resolved by the end. Said resolution might not come until A5, but I think it will come.
Overall I just don't really think it's fair to vilify Neytiri simply because that resolution didn't happen in Spider's childhood--y'know, before the real meat of the story even got started. Have some patience, friends.
tl;dr in a vacuum is Neytiri "in the right" for disliking Spider based on his ancestry? No, of course not. But is she a bad person for struggling to like/trust humans in general after all the very real and very serious traumas she's experienced? Also no. Is it something she needs to work on, sure--but give it time, and let's see how the story develops.
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ateez cancer moon squad: the moon... has so much power...
k so we know that ateez has a hilarious gemini moon/cancer moon* split, and we've observed the various ways the gemini moons channel their personal chaos brains so now let's get into our cancer moons: seonghwa, wooyoung, mingi, and yeosang. the moon is at home in cancer, so she is. powerful. the moon/mother archetype is not just nurture happy nurture she is also murder angry murder, don't forget!!
*(and jongho, whose moon is either aries or pisces with about an 80:20 likelihood for aries based on his birth date and like... his personality)
cancer moon: feelings are the soup from whence i came :) luke i am ur mother :) i am both a magnificent vessel of compassion who truly understands the cycles of life and the divinity of the moon but also i am a tyrant who can and will do terrible manipulation bc i had a feeling about something and had to survive somehow probably by screaming and screaming and screaming :) negative attention is attention :) if a feeling falls in the woods and no one validates my emotions do i EVEN EXIST????
seonghwa: i am completely ruled by my emotions and subconscious search for security but i pretend i do not see it
wooyoung: sure have a lot of generational curses :) anyway bye :)
yeosang: none of your business (cutely)
mingi: i am completely ruled by my emotions and subconscious search for security and i'm going to make it your problem
cancer moon squad: wow these guys could really radiate 'lunar' as in 'killer werewolf' or 'lunar' as in 'majestic icon of bountiful love illuminating the darkness' looks like gemini moon doesn't have a monopoly on duality!!!
ok listen. seonghwa and wooyoung's moons are crazy. their sections are really long. can't believe i am saying this, but in this area at least mingi and yeosang are normal. kind of.
seonghwa
right off the bat it's clear why seonghwa and wooyoung project cancer moon energy more than mingi or yeosang usually do--wooyoung's moon is up by his mc, and seonghwa is a cancer rising. everything in seonghwa's life is really herded and driven by that moon in cancer energy and his need for emotional security.
cancer moon: i feel safe and happy when i care for others! i need to nurture and to be nurtured :) i can sense unhappiness in ur microexpressions!! let me make u soup :) wait why didn't you make me soup?? >:( i felt the need for soup loudly in your direction why didn't you pick up the hints?? talk about my emotions i shouldn't have to do that it's very clear from my face! and incredible ability to radiate vibes so powerful they fog up the entire building! u don't love me. omg. wait ur yelling at me, u do love me! in the moon decan: extra that :) extra all of that :) crescent moon: u could be anything :) for better or worse :) ur youthful and also kind of tied to the past and ur gonna have to deal with that, but damn girl ur potential!! in the 12th house: my ultra-sensitivity means i can really pick up vibes...omg i'm drowning in the emotions of the world.. ... i need to express them artistically and then be by myself for 5 hours or i am literally gonna ghost everyone and join a monastery i swear to god quincunx neptune: i just do so much sacrifice... all the time... that no one is asking me to do, and yet, in the 7th house: i have no choice but to do this self-sacrifice, because I Think of The Group First, so, again, i don't have to communicate about it or ask if i should, it is obvious, that i must, for the group in aquarius: and it's because of my Higher Understanding and Intelligence About Humanity, don't question me, i know what i'm talking about, again i'm doing this for humanitarian reasons,, that again i do not have to communicate about,
trine south node: my nurturing and empathetic and somewhat self-sacrificing nature can both drag me back into my primordial soup and yet is also the key to my soul learning its lessons???? in the 8th house: union with others is the way to know urself :) subverting my own personal power through relationships to other powerful people or through manipulation worked awesome (??) in my past lives (????) so, in pisces: also, delulu is the solulu!! when in doubt, subsume the self in whatever escapism is convenient :)
seonghwa is truly so wild because so many of his planets are basically unaspected. you can see what happens (1-->2) when i tighten the orbs a little bit and then, with more generous orbs but no minor aspects visible (2-->3).
SO depending on your view, we have an unaspected moon, a yod with neptune and pluto, or a duet with neptune. so. that's fun! they always work together and they do not have to abide by the laws of any country they have diplomatic immunity and they honestly should be arrested they're doing too much! however seonghwa, as the government, can't even see them! is this metaphor getting too convoluted? buds i'm mercury ruled and you can fucking tell, if you didn't like this narrative style i assume you would not have gotten this far in this thing. i am really trying to keep my thoughts in order here but there are so many variables. but let's keep going!! fighting!!
here are the main interpretations:
his moon is unaspected -- the moon is like "baby i'm not even here i'm an illusion" and seonghwa is like yes, true, very true, again i'm very even-keeled and do not have intense emotions at all. meanwhile, everyone around seonghwa is like, uh... the moon is... very obvious? the emperor has no clothes??? you have so many feelings?
his moon and neptune are in a duet -- emotions and escapism are the same thing. not one feeling is had without neptune's heavy hand. lord the empathy is off the charts but so is the ability to ignore anything inconvenient. delulu is the solulu indeed. also other people can see this very clearly, but seonghwa is like what? me???? i'm so practical and grounded. what are u talking about.
with more generous orbs, we can add pluto to complete a yod. pluto has a lot of aspects and a yod is also. a lot!! an even more intense generational lesson. this one is a little bit of a stretch tbh, but it has yodishness in the vibe, i guess.
well! seonghwa can thank his ancestors, because unaspected planets and yods represent a talent or skill or a potential you have but also something your family has been struggling with for generations (usually by repression or overemphasis) and with you, it's finally time to get some shit done. (i have 3 yods, it's not that bad i feel like it often makes you Majestic and Wise but god it ain't easy)
moon, neptune and pluto in a yod: hey girl... ever spent generations suppressing your emotions and dreams and denying your intense personal power, probably? :) time to sort that out :) 12th, 7th and 5th in a yod: should we subsume our identity in the emotions of others and the suffering of the world? or should we subsume our identity in personal relationships? or should we (and this is crazy, i know) express... our identity... creatively? too bad we will never agree on how to go about doing anything! let's bounce around between extremes!
nobody in this dynamic can do anything without arguing with the other planets.
moon in cancer in the 12th house: safety is found in caring for others and being cared for, but in the 12th house i really believe in caring for the world!! my emotions are porous in a way that may be unhealthy! i need to withdraw into solitude, maybe with an intimate partner! neptune in aquarius in the 7th house: not so fast there buddy. ever considered that real people will never live up to your theoretical imagination of who they could be?? the idea of relationships are cute but actual ones, idk, i agree we should definitely withdraw into solitude tho pluto in sagittarius in the 5th house: ew, withdRAW?? safety??? in solitude?? yuck!! like, dwelling on things, becoming obsessive, that sounds great and sign me up, but how can you possibly express yourself creatively and receive many accolades and awards for said creative self-expression in solitude? i don't think so. use your power! express yourself! the drive for transformation through creative expression is so fucking strong in you buddy. and i brought backup! i have like. so many other aspects.
seonghwa i'm so sorry bro you have a lot of shit to unearth and an eternal searching feeling you will have to learn to live with and enjoy! but ur talents are so many!!
unrelated to his moon journey, his aquarius venus is straight up unaspected. like not even arguably, she is completely unaspected, not even to his ascendant or MC. nothing. no wonder seonghwa has no idea why people see him as a unique beautiful fashion icon (venus) who plays with unconventional, out-of-the-box expression (aquarius) and is high drama and powerful (8th house). he literally cannot see his own gift and talent in this area! he is. so empathetic and observant of other people and yet, about himself, god knows.
and. we're not done. we are not done!!! his aries venus, saturn and mercury (retrograde) are conjunct each other, square the ascendant (more themes of identity and conformity), and that's... it? there a duet for 3. a trio? triplets? is this a thing too? i've read three entire books about unaspected planets and it has not come up, just duets, and yet i feel like... i feel like it's pretty much the same thing as a duet but with three so... lord. i gotta move on or i'll spend all day on seonghwa. wild i am telling u. wild.
wooyoung
haha. speaking of generational shit.
we don't know wooyoung's exact time of birth so this is just in the window, but let's run with it. in the time given not that much would shift.
cancer moon: i feel safe and happy when i care for others! i need to nurture and to be nurtured :) i can sense unhappiness in ur microexpressions!! let me make u soup :) wait why didn't you make me soup?? >:( i felt the need for soup loudly in your direction why didn't you pick up the hints?? talk about my emotions i shouldn't have to do that it's very clear from my face! and incredible ability to radiate vibes so powerful they fog up the entire building! omg u don't love me. omg. omg ur yelling at me, u do love me! in the moon decan: extra that :) extra all of that :) in the 10th house: also, i need public attention for my achievements to feel safe! gotta make myself vulnerable on national television! my water moon in the 10th means i gotta get creative and artistic and express emotional truth. also i am a little too attached to societal norms for my own good :/ i've really internalized some stuff emotionally... .. . haha? widely conjunct MC: success and praise = safety. same thing. job is life. i love to nurture (cancer) people i work with (MC, 10th house) and make people feel loved! cancer moon in the 10th conjunct MC: i am intensely sensitive to the minute disapproval of others because that signifies a lack of safety :) quincunx the sun in sagittarius in the 3rd house in the jupiter decan: one prob here bud--ego expression should be done by getting the hell out of here??? and never taking anything seriously for one second??? how do you not know this by now?? chat chat chat but keep it cute and be the first to leave, sound familiar??? also, your career? society? gross. i have ideological concerns. also i'm going to make ur personality larger than life ;) u ready :)
his MC (public identity) is in a yod with his sun (identity) in sagittarius (gotta be ME) in the 3rd house (let's TALK about it i am curious about trying out different things!) and neptune (dreams, illusions, creativity) in aquarius (no. seriously. gotta be me) in the 4th house (uh... have u ever considered ur idyllic dreams of ur perfect childhood might not be... 100%... accurate? lol?) conjunct mars (action, will) in capricorn (no wait i love being #normal i was joking before) in the 4th house (no... seriously... about your childhood memories... let's rethink some of that....... ... were u ever, perhaps, experiencing misguided aggression. .. towards u???? at any point?? ha ha???!).
all of this is pretty interwoven with his moon's aspects, so we'll see some of the same themes repeat.
moon in cancer in the 10th: yeah so like i was saying, expressing emotion publicly to many people is awesome and wholesome and makes me feel great-- square libra ascendant: definitely, love that, like it's great to make everyone like you, totally agree, however, about those darker emotions, idk if that's the vibe necessarily-- venus in the first house in the uranus decan: vibe? dude i love vibes. playing by the rules is silly i don't do that because i'm fun :) and cool :) don't you like me??? you like me right??? i feel alienated somehow even though u like me... .. idk venus conjunct astraea, who is an asteroid and not a super mega one but we'll still talk about it: better cling to past behaviors even if they aren't healthy :) too bad u have a complete inability to see urself the way others see u :) almost like ur always desperately striving for love u already have?? quincunx pluto: knock knock, transformation desire for big changes and unconscious soul safety needs here, i'm gonna play a real big role in ur life! every time you find safety through public approval and your job i'm gonna just wiggle in there and be like, is this enough? and it won't be :) because of me :) in sagittarius: also what you've described doesn't sound like finding security through independent thought and/or running the hell away... which it should, imo, time to go! in the 3rd house: no seriously ever heard of seeking security through gathering information? i wanna talk to everyone and experience everything. that's security! duh! emotions are weird! moon exactly quincunx chiron in sagittarius in the 3rd house: knock knock it's me, childhood trauma!! i'm reeaeaalllly gonna destabilize your emotional foundation possibly because of being a kid who asked questions and said things people were trying to hide?? or about being an independent thinker unable to suppress ur unique self-expression in a conformist society?? idk!! oopsie! lilith, conjunct chiron and also quincunx the moon: hey i'm mostly here to really amplify chiron! u know those wounds? they are real loud. i'm also here to just add. so much energy and potency. to everything around me! and also unconventional expression. :) just in case you weren't already torn between your irrepressible personality and your safety-seeking need to please everyone by conforming! haha! your pain can really drive you towards darker behavior and escapism!! trine hygeia in scorpio in the 2nd, who is an asteroid and not a super mega one but we'll still talk about it: self-esteem and the body are the same, which is a very healthy and normal thought that will never become a problem, also i'm a little too comfortable with harsh action as a way to achieve "health", anyway, much nicer, i have a natural gift for healing others emotionally :) with my words and presence, but also my body :) just kidding! unless... full moon: i'm just gonna sprinkle in some illumination for u, some culmination of a cycle, some need for higher meaning, some searching, some power, some witchery, some fertility as in creation, incredibly strong Pulls from different directions that you're gonna have to reconcile with each other, enjoy!!!
tbh you could also argue wooyoung has another yod between pluto, the moon and saturn... which would be more generational stuff about power/transformation, emotional expression, and whether to or how to break free from societal conditioning, so we are on theme. boy. no wonder seonghwa is like, that is my baby kitten. struggles!
yeosang
yeosang does have two quincunxes from his moon, but they're a little too far apart to make it a true yod however he still vibes with that energy. interestingly he both has some definite past life stuff and a fresh slate of new incarnation cycle energy. also fun, as an aries rising his houses are paired with their own signs, so they are a little more intense in the sign!
cancer moon: i feel safe and happy when i care for others! i need to nurture and to be nurtured :) i can sense unhappiness in ur microexpressions!! let me make u soup :) wait why didn't you make me soup?? >:( i felt the need for soup loudly in your direction why didn't you pick up the hints?? talk about my emotions i shouldn't have to do that it's very clear from my face! and incredible ability to radiate vibes so powerful they fog up the entire building! omg u don't love me. omg. omg ur yelling at me, u do love me! in the moon decan: extra that :) extra all of that :) new moon: omg a whole new incarnation cycle!! so fun!! so fresh!!! plan nothing!! enjoy spontaneity! it's time to explore the world and discover who i am!!! this is so exciting!!! in the 4th house: i need. a stable home. to feel secure!!! god! i've learned to roll with instability throughout the many changes in my life but it is annoying as hell conjunct IC: do NOT look at my feelings i do NOT have them and if i DO they'd be none of ur business! in cancer: my shell will protect me, get out! opposite mc: family and home are real important to my expression of self in the world and how i feel i fit in the fabric of the universe. hey have you ever tried in capricorn: repressing all of your emotions? :) to succeed and find your place in the world?? ruler of the mc saturn in taurus in the 2nd: feel like that subconscious fear of poverty and deprivation could really help you with all that repression, huh, maybe you should work so hard every day all day :) suffering is normal :) square ascendant: hey i'm also here to complicate ur journey for safety and security! your life path and identity is gonna force you to integrate your emotional self and security needs with your overall purpose and that's not gonna be super comfortable for you, sorry buddy!! although i also bless you with an intense intuition and ability to read people, so, you're welcome for the penetrating eyes in aries: welcome to a whole new soul cycle! i'm excited! i'm here! i'm ready to vibe! let's go! ruler of the ascendant mars in libra in the 7th house: mmm... not so fast there... let's not make decisions all at once... or ever? or ever! or if you want to, like, that's fine with me. i can roll with whatever hahaha honestly it's up to you... . idk i don't want to make a decision ok?? mars in the mercury libra decan: i fear... intimacy... why can't we just keep it cute :( keep it chill :( moon quincunx pluto: knock knock, transformation desire for big changes and unconscious soul safety needs here, i'm gonna play a real big role in ur life! in the 9th house in sagittarius: being safe at home is not enough. you gotta develop a personal philosophy, a wider place in the world, a bigger frame to see the world... honestly you should probably run away from people and maybe society so that you can properly protect yourself... quincunx lilith in the 9th: you are so right society does suck and you should feel an innate desire to rebel that is categorically at odds with your cancer moon's desire to stay out of it and your capricorn mc's desire to fit in perfectly with the structures of society..... wow wouldn't it suck if your intense magnetism in your creative and social life (lilith trine venus in leo in the 5th house) naturally drew you to notice the structures of society and the individual... and idk, just spitballing here, what if everyone fell in love with you, idk... moon in cancer: (inside crab shell) anyway
god it is so nice to see someone who is not caught up in a deeply complex generational karmic struggle right now, only the normal generational karmic struggle! i have been writing this thing for hours. yeosang is so brand new! aries rising, new cycle; natal new moon, new cycle. cute. altho, again, lots of personal soul past life stuff he's just on a new journey now and also not tapped in as much to his own family's psychological neuroses.
mingi
we really don't know mingi's birth time at alljk, we do!!! i'm gonna go further into mingi's chart in a future write up but this is the moon.
moon in cancer: i feel safe and happy when i care for others! i need to nurture and to be nurtured :) i can sense unhappiness in ur microexpressions!! let me make u soup :) wait why didn't you make me soup?? >:( i felt the need for soup loudly in your direction why didn't you pick up the hints?? talk about my emotions i shouldn't have to do that it's very clear from my face! and incredible ability to radiate vibes so powerful they fog up the entire building! omg u don't love me. omg. omg ur yelling at me, u do love me! in the pluto decan: but make it sexy. make it passion. make it fuck you a little bit i'll fuck u up. crab got claws balsamic dark moon: here is some karma for u, hey but with karma comes wisdom!!!, you felt different from other people when you were a kid probably not in a good way and you're gonna have to work thru some stuff for closure!! in the 7th house: i need to be in a relationship like yesterday. right now bro. i'm not kidding bro. i am willing to compromise whatever u want ok i swear, i can make it work, just, semisquare venus in virgo in the 8th: yes i crave deep transformative union with another, and the minute i feel this relationship isn't going well i will torpedo my entire emotional health in one second :) trine mars: man fuck that, energy! style! ability to assert yourself! you've got it all! also your emotions feed into your temper and vice versa so maybe be careful there in scorpio: how do u say... depression? constant need to bury urself in the depths of Truth? idk maybe people are lying?? double check. don't trust anyone!! in the 11th house: yeah better be in charge of everyone because that way you know you will accomplish your dreams!! all or nothing bro! make everyone see it your way!! moon in the 7th house: wait but i... trust... everyone?? bro? sextile saturn: no listen. train try hard, then society approves of you, repeat, and when you work hard everyone loves you including authority figures!! you can finally accomplish a societal ideal of masculinity, look how tall you are right??? just hide several pretty important things about yourself! don't worry about it! think about all the success! in taurus: but do it in a chill way, man. like ultimately... we all die. so maybe let's just work in the here-and-now and acquire some soft items and delicious food, that is also success, in the 5th house: that restrictive childhood was not a vibe, but it sure taught me a lot! for example i love scheduling and policing my own creativity and fun and then punishing myself when i don't live up to my own insane standards :) quincunx uranus: i agree with mars and disagree with saturn, just make a bunch of choices and commit to them without thinking at all lol also authority figures are dumb don't trust them in aquarius: hey also, ever wonder if no one understands you quincunx uranus: mmm.. .very good point.... no one does understand me... in the 2nd house: which is awesome. being different is cool. although uh. maybe don't check your bank account. haha. sextile vesta and hygeia in virgo in the 9th, again asteroids and not one of the huge biggie ones but still gonna touch on it: ever got anxiety from ur own perfectionism and harsh life philosophy so hard ur body stopped working? haha. just wondering. i mean u could also find emotional health and healing through good work habits and a commitment to a healthy vision of the future but idk quincunx south node in aquarius: the profound loneliness of life... and past lives... haunts me... in the 2nd house: man having my past lives spent so much time in survival mode sure didn't give them a ton of space for transforming themselves and dealing with their own issues and themes! bummer. good luck to whoever does have to deal with all this mess lol glad that's not me!! north node in the 8th house: :) south node in the 2nd house: ... it is me isn't it north node in the 8th house: :)
#kpop astrology#ateez astrology#mingi astrology#seonghwa astrology#wooyoung astrology#yeosang astrology#now with edited mingi!
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... Warning, rant in coming. Sorry.
Hot take, the only morally gray character in mess, that fits the exact definition of it, is Nie Huaisang.
I've seen more and more people trying to tone down Jiang Cheng's terribleness by saying that he's morally gray. I'very also seen those same people say that Wei Wuxian is morally gray because he did terrible things for good (and, no, lmao, he didn't. Most of those come from people not understanding how his cultivation works.) and that that was why he is so interesting. (Again, lmao. Lol even. Just say you don't appreciate depths and confuse "kind" with "boring", so you gotta give every character that you don't find boring a label to justify why you like them.)
I think the term "morally gray" has become a buzz word thrown around for any kind of character that isn't one dimensionally good or evil.
Jiang Cheng isn't morally gray. He is a bad person. Again, a PERSON. Not a monster, not some sort of creatures that has no concept of humanity, just. A bad person.
Society's habit of separating people that do bad things from themselves, that "us vs them" mantality, that dehumanization of bad people, it just leave a bad taste in my mouth. Even fucking serial killers have qualities, can be smart or charismatic or empathetic. Even pedophiles have hobbies and people that love them. Even rapists have people that they love and respect.
Being a terrible person doesn't mean that they're not human. There is no one in the world that has absolutely no redeeming qualities to them. But because of that separation that so many people take for the truth, because of that "they did this because they're a monster, but I'm not so I would never do this", people just cannot accept when a bad person isn't bad all the time.
They'll look at Jiang Cheng that, ultimately, loves his family and is arguably hard working, and they'll think that that means he's "morally gray", because he possesses good qualities, completely ignoring the fact that he's just a trash human being in general.
Low key, it pisses me off. Especially the people that relate so hard to him, and ask me if I wouldn't do the same in his shoes. Because no. I fucking wouldn't cause genocide. I wouldn't torture and kill complete strangers because they dared to have a surname I don't like or because they make me think of someone I resent from my past.
Like, I took can see myself in him, totally. He IS well written, and between the cartoonishly bad Xue Yang and the paragons of moral virtue that is Wangxian, he's definitely the one that feels closest to an everyday man, in personality if you ignore all the murders. I am petty, I hold grudges, I can be entitled and selfish, I am overall a massive rude cunt, but I do not want to hurt people and everyday I strive to be better than the last, even in infinitesimal ways. As should anyone. But that is something that Jiang Cheng doesn't even acknowledge, stuck as he is in his victim mentality and inferiority complex.
But Jiang Cheng is morally bankrupt. He is not morally gray. Not even dark gray. As an adult, he is painstakingly human and in general, a bad person.
And that is OK.
To make him a better person, you don't have to change his entire character with half assed head canons, just make him acknowledge his flaws and let him (finally) grow as a person, past that stubborn mentality he has had for decades.
He IS a bad person, but even bad people have a capacity for growth and change, of the moment they allow themselves to. If he ever gets forgiven for his past actions, that's on the people he has hurt, not that it should even be considered in his journey towards growth.
(Frankly, I don't think he would be. I think he shouldn't be, but that's not for me to decide. However, I can definitely JC finally making some tiny progresses but for all the wrong reasons, and get insulted when, if he ever even get to that point, his apologies don't end up fixing everything. He is totally the kind of person that would see you being mad at them and feel like he's the one being victimized because you didn't accept his half assed apologies. The emotional maturity on this man is below -100.)
(Also, Wei Wuxian isn't morally gray in the total opposite, in that he is such a good person, be it morally or emotionally, just. God, I envy his mental fortitude and his capacity for forgiveness and love.)
Sorry again for the ask, just had to rant somewhere about this and I am kind of curious about how you consider the "morally gray" argument. I think it's total bullshit, if the entire post didn't tell you, but yeah, I'm curious.
I hope I was coherent enough, I did not plan this ask at all, it was all streams of consciousness.
So before I get to the actual material of your rant—of which I agree with—I want to go on a tangent. Bad people as a category are not “dehumanized.” Dehumanization is the act of stripping someone or a group of people of their humanity as a tool of oppression, and it must come with material consequences. Saying that a continent of people are only capable of non-human animal intelligence to justify centuries of enslavement is dehumanization. Saying that a country of people are born terrorists to justify flattening their homeland and claiming it by a different name is dehumanization. Claiming that the man who called you out on your desires to be the new oppressors is a literal demon wanting to destroy your heritage in order to justify leading an army to kill him and his charges while attempting to remove their ability to reincarnate is dehumanization. Calling a child abuser a monster is not dehumanization. It is just an insult.
In fact, the “human traits” of terrible human beings do not need to be defended, because more often than not the absolute worst human beings are materially protected from the consequences of their actions by people who want to defend their “humanity.” In mdzs, I don’t give two fucks about Jiang Cheng’s one “human” trait of loving his nephew, because his “inhumane” traits of abusing said nephew and everyone else in his life intentionally overshadow that by his own design. Jiang Yanli loved her son just as much and lost much more than Jiang Cheng ever did, but she didn’t become an unrepentant monster. Humans are not “monsters-in-waiting” whereby we must act as if every individual is always one step away from committing unspeakable acts of depravity. If that was the case, we would not have survived as a community-dependent social species. Therefore, I do not find Jiang Cheng as the most relatable character ever because I do not find the way that he gives into anti-human behaviors to be relatable to me on a personal level or to be representative of most people’s actions throughout the course of their lives. To feel pain is human, and to have outbursts about it is understandable. To abuse about it? To murder about it? To mass murder about it??? Absolutely anti-human, anti-community, and the type of behavior that can only survive and thrive in an environment that privileges people with those specific “inhumane” traits above everyone else. (One might even call it the environment of a corrupt hierarchy of power that mdzs critiques.) The exact opposite of dehumanization. So if I choose to call Jiang Cheng a monster, it is to intentionally point out the ways that his conscious actions as a character in this story are a negation of human life and community.
On that note, I’ve discussed how this fandom uses “morally gray” in this ask (excuse the fact that I switch between “grey” and “gray” lmao). To bring back a point from my rant from above, Jiang Cheng has his one (1) good trait leveraged by fandom to whitewash his crimes under the guise of “morally gray,” while Wei Wuxian is the one actually being dehumanized by that same label as people use it to justify his literal murder (and those of the Wen remnants) in the story, so that’s my feelings on that. Whether Jiang Cheng can be redeemed or not, I frankly do not care to speculate because the story concludes his character arc at him regressing back into Jiang “hunter of Wen” Cheng, still rich, still single, and still only loved by his nephew. At the end of the day, he is not a real person and I’m only here for wangxian.
#mdzs asks#anon#sorry anon#it was supposed to be a short tangent#it is not in fact short#no offense to you I’ve just found myself increasingly unsatisfied with how ‘dehumanization’ has been stripped of its actual meaning#in the recent months#it’s meant to be understood as a tool that oppresses people#and none of the groups or characters you’ve listed are oppressed *because* of those traits#none of the characters listed are oppressed *at all*
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