#but the juxtaposition of their perception of the relationship

[word-wytch]

Don't Stand So Close To Me

Eddie x Teacher!Reader

Chapter 1/? 3.5k Series Masterlist

��︎ Summary: Forced to move back home to Hawkins after your fiancé cheats on you, you begin to fall in love again with an audacious 20 year old metalhead, only there’s one problem — he’s still in high school and you’re his English teacher.

While you struggle starting over in a place you never thought you would return, Eddie struggles feeling stuck in a place he can’t manage to leave — until you offer to help him.

Of all the lessons learned, the most important are the ones you teach each other.

✏︎ Series CW: forbidden romance, slow burn, perv!eddie, smut (18+ mdni), true love, internal conflict, student-teacher relationship, 10 year age gap, mutual pining, sexual tension, emotions, drama, angst, character development, happy ending :)

A/N: I've poured my heart and soul into this one.

Fourth period English was the only class that Eddie Munson could seem to pay attention in, though not exactly to the lessons. 

He propped his cheek against his knuckles as he watched you from the back of the classroom.

“See, everything is filtered through Holden’s limited first person narration, so we get really pure insight into how he sees the world, but we also have to take it with a grain of salt,” you said, delicate heels clicking against the tile floor as you paced back and forth. “We see what he pays attention to, and therefore what we ought to pay attention to as readers.”

Eddie’s eyes traced the curve of your waist, over the back of your tweed pencil skirt as you turned to place the chalk back on the ledge at the bottom of the board. It was hugging you in all the right places, as it did every time you wore it. His favorite.

“Alright let’s break out the quotes and notes assignment from chapter ten. Who would like to share their thoughts on a quote with the class?” 

Your eyes scanned the room. Students shifted in their chairs in an awkward silence before a hand shot up in the front row. 

“Nancy,” you smiled and gestured to her, “Take the floor.” 

“Ok so one of the quotes I picked out was where he says ‘I damn near gave my kid sister Phoebe a buzz, though. I certainly felt like talking to her on the phone. Someone with sense and all.’ I think it’s really interesting that he says that she has sense,” said Nancy.

Eddie barely registered a word of what Nancy said. He was too transfixed on your shirt, the way the fabric parted at the buttons when you leaned in just the right way. Sometimes if he was lucky he could catch a flash of skin, a glimpse of delicate lace from your bra. It almost made him wish he would have picked a seat closer to the front of the class. 

Nancy continued. “Right now he’s surrounded by very mature things at the hotel that he’s trying to make sense of and has really negative opinions about. He keeps thinking of his little sister though, and that’s always positive, so that’s in contrast to the rest of what’s going on.”

“Thank you, Nancy, that’s exactly right. A juxtaposition, very perceptive of you.”

Eddie shifted in his seat, feeling his pants start to tighten. 

“Does anyone else have a quote they’d like to share their thoughts on with the class?”

Chairs creaked, a few legs scooted loudly against the floor in the restless silence. A sniffle.

“Come on, Nancy can’t carry this entire class.” You tapped your fingers on the desk behind you. “Well, I know she could but I’m not going to let her,” you said, giving her a little wink.

Still silence. 

“Alright, fine.” You glanced around at the rows of averted eyes until yours settled on the young man in the leather jacket seated at the very back far right corner of the classroom. “Eddie,” you said with a gentle smile. 

His dark eyes shot up, face flushing. 

“Do you have any thoughts on what you read in chapter ten last night?”

Eddie licked his lips, casting his eyes downward in thought. “I uh,” his mouth was like cotton, “No I don’t really think I… understood the chapter,” he said, giving a sheepish grin. The soft pout of disappointment on your pretty lips made his stomach drop.

“I don’t think he can even read the chapter,” muttered the blonde athlete in the seat next to him.  

“Jason,” you began, but Eddie didn’t miss a beat.

“I don’t think you can even read your girlfriend,” he said, to which the class awakened audibly.

Jason shot daggers at Eddie. “Why don’t you quit talking to her and find a girlfriend closer to your  age, huh? There’s plenty at the senior home across the street.”

The class erupted in laughter.

“Stop it, both of you!” you shouted over the din. “The next person to make another sound has detention,” you said sternly. The class grew quiet again, allowing space for your voice to soften. “Eddie, please see me after class.”

“Oooh,” mocked Jason as he sat back and laughed.

“Jason, detention.”

“What? No!”

“I told you, the next person to speak has detention. I don’t make idle threats.”

Eddie’s lips curled into a satisfied grin as he watched you command the room.

“Please,” Jason begged,  “It’s the last practice before the game tomorrow.”

“No. You can use your time in detention to work on practicing some self control.”

Jason huffed and shot Eddie another glare but Eddie’s eyes were fixed on his desk, teeth sinking into his bottom lip as his face contorted. It took all of his strength to bite back a laugh.

You sighed and leaned back on your desk at the front of the classroom. “Now then,” you started, composing yourself, “I’ll be very curious to read all of your assigned journal entries from this chapter, since clearly so many of you have something to say.”

Chairs shifted. A cough.

“Alright, pass them forward,” you said, gesturing to the class. 

The room was filled with the sound of sheets being torn from notebooks, binders opening, paper shuffling. The students passed the pages forward up the four rows and you walked by to collect them.

“Why don’t we spend the last fifteen minutes of class silently reading the book, hm? Then maybe tomorrow we might have something to talk about.”

You returned to sit at your desk with the papers as the students opened up their books. 

Eddie dug his beat up copy of The Catcher in the Rye out of the mess of his backpack. The red, soft cover spine was beginning to peel away from abuse.

He opened it up to a random page and began to gloss over the words but none of them registered. His mind was too full of other images — the arch of your back, the way you toyed at your lips with your finger in thought, of what you would look like bent over that desk of yours with him on top of you.

Fifteen minutes passed like this. The bell rang. 

Eddie waited in his seat as the other students filed out of the classroom, turning to bury the book in his backpack in an effort to avoid Jason, but it didn’t matter.

“Watch it, freak. I mean it, I’ve got my eyes on you,” said Jason, to which Eddie simply raised his eyebrows in mock fear.

After the last student left, Eddie slowly approached you, dragging his feet a little as he walked. 

You swiped the last of the chalk from the board with the eraser, leaving a small cloud of dust as you turned to face him. 

“Sorry for the outburst today.” The chain on his wrist rattled as he brought a hand to his chest, “I meant no disrespect,” he said earnestly. “Well, I did to Jason, but never to you.”

You returned a soft smile, “Thanks, I appreciate the apology even though I can see that you weren’t exactly the instigator.” 

“Yeah, well, Jason, like any basic primate, seems to think that any male who comes within three feet of his mate is a threat.”

A snort escaped you. Basic primate.  

Eddie’s eyes crinkled, his smile contagious. “Besides, Chrissy’s the one who came over to talk to me anyway.”  

You sighed and shook your head, not really knowing what to say.

“Sorry, I know, I’ll stop.”

You gave him a gracious look and took a deep breath to compose yourself, “Eddie,” you started.

His mouth curved ever so slightly as he relished in the way his name rolled off your tongue.

“We’ve been in class for about a month now,” you began, “You haven’t turned in an assignment in the last two weeks.”

Eddie scratched the back of his head, “Yeah, uh, sorry about that.”

“Now I might be new to teaching here, but I know this isn’t your first time in this class, nor your second. Clearly there must be some part of you that wants to graduate, or else you would have just dropped out two years ago, right?” you asked, searching his eyes. “You don’t strike me as the sort of person who does anything they don’t want to do.”

Eddie smirked, “It’s only been a month and you already know me so well, miss.”

There was something about the way that he said it that brought a heat to your cheeks. You tucked your hair behind your ear in an attempt to hide it. “Well, what do you think we can do about this little conundrum then? I don’t want to see you fail.” 

“I dunno, maybe I just… need a little help?” he said sheepishly.  

You hummed, bringing a curved finger to your lips in thought. “I want to help you, but you have to be willing to put in some effort.”

“I know, I’ve been totally slacking. That’s on me. I can change that,” he said assuredly, “I promise.”

You smiled softly at his earnestness. “If you’re willing to put in the effort, I would be open to tutoring you. I have some time after school today if you want to stop by my classroom, we can come up with a game plan then.”

Eddie’s dark eyes widened at the suggestion, “I’d appreciate that very much, miss.”

You gave a nod, “Sure thing. I’ll see you after school then. I’ll be here.”

 “See ya later,” he said, grabbing his well worn backpack and slinging it over his shoulder. “Oh, and,” he turned back toward you, closing the distance between you even further. His eyes lingered over your lips for a moment before meeting your gaze again, “Thank you.”

“Of course,” you half whispered.

You turned toward your desk to gather the papers in as neat a pile as you could manage with the frayed edges left by spiral notebooks and placed them in your fourth period grading folder. The bell rang out again through the halls signaling lunch period. You grabbed your purse from under your desk and closed the classroom door behind you. 

Walking through the halls of Hawkins High was like a strange recurring dream. Same drop ceiling, same tile floor. Same weird smell when you walked past the science room. The same cliques too — the jocks, the burnouts, the party animals. This time with less bell bottoms and fringe, more leg warmers and hairspray. Surprisingly little had changed. 

You opened the door to the teacher’s lounge adjacent to the cafeteria. The wood paneled walls and old carpet were much less familiar to you than the hallways and classrooms you had spent countless hours in. It was strange to be on this side of things now.

“How’s your day going so far, sweetie?” chimed Ms. Click, putting the glass coffee pot back on the warmer. 

“Oh, you know, just another day of pulling teeth from my class. I swear Nancy Wheeler was the only one who read the chapter last night.”

A swoon swept across the room. “Oh Nancy, she really is such a bright star isn’t she?” Ms. Click remarked, her voice sweet like table sugar.  “You know she kind of reminds me of you when you were her age, doesn’t she, Doris?” 

Doris O’Donnell hummed and pursed her lips with a little nod.

“Well, smarts-wise anyway. Boy I try not to pick favorites but you certainly were a pleasure to have in class. If I’m remembering right you were valedictorian, weren’t you?” 

You offered a weak smile, “Yep, class of ’74.”

“’74? Goodness it hasn’t been that long has it? Gosh we sure are getting old aren’t we?” she called over to Ms. O’Donnell, the beads on her glasses chain rattling as she laughed, “Oh goodness I don’t mean you sweetie,” she said, putting her hand on yours reassuringly, “Heck if I didn’t know you I would have mistaken you for a student!”

“Thank you Ms. — I mean Peggy.” You grabbed a mug from the stack and turned it over in your hands. #1 Teacher. The matte apple and text printed on the front of it was fading with age. You filled it with coffee and and grabbed a small open milk carton sitting nearby, watching the cream swirl in the mug before taking a seat at one of the three round tables with plastic veneer to look like wood. 

“Gosh, you know I don’t mean to pry, but with such a pretty face to match the good head on your shoulders I would have thought you’d have a different last name by now.”

You stared into your coffee, feeling the ghost of the ring on your finger. “Ah, yeah. Almost, but… it didn’t work out.” 

“Oh — I’m sorry sweetie, I didn’t realize.”

“It’s um — it’s fine.”

“You know there’s plenty of lovely young bachelors at St. Michael’s, we’re having a potluck tonight if you want to come.” 

It took all of your strength to hide a visible grimace. Sounds delightful. “No thanks, I can’t. I’ve offered to tutor a student after school today.”

“Who might that be?” asked Ms. Click.

“Eddie Munson.” 

The whole room groaned. 

Ms. O’Donnell cackled from her corner, her toad-like face contorting. “Good luck. I’ve been stuck with him for the last three years. Honestly I don’t know why he’s still in school. He’s too old to be here anymore if you ask me.”

Your eyes shot up from your coffee. “Well, he must have some desire to be here or otherwise he wouldn’t be. Isn’t it our duty as teachers to help students achieve milestones?” 

Ms. O’Donnell huffed, “Oh yeah, he needs help alright. None that I can give him though.” 

“I can imagine that help would be a difficult thing to offer while putting him down.”

She snorted, “Sure sweetie. Say some magic words of encouragement, that’ll do the trick. Hey, pick me up a little fairy dust too while you’re at it.” 

Laughter rang out across the teachers lounge.

Your lips formed a hard line as you popped open the tupperware container which held your salad.  

“Keep us posted, will you? We’re all dying to know how it goes.”

______

You could hear the lockers slamming shut as the din in the hallway began to die down, students filtering out with the last bell of the day. You flipped through the pile of notebook papers on your desk, making small notes on each one with a green pen before setting them onto the neat pile in front of you. You never liked to use red, too harsh. 

There was a strange feeling in your stomach that you couldn’t seem to shake. You wondered if perhaps the chicken on your salad had sat in the fridge for a few days too many. 

Your eyes shot up from your papers as you heard footsteps at the door. “Hey, Eddie.”

Eddie flashed you a smile and a little wave as he dragged a chair from the far corner of the room to the empty spot across from you and plunked himself down in it.

“How are you?” you asked.

“Oh, you know, just another day in suburban paradise.”

You chuckled dryly, “Yeah, you could say that again.”

Eddie fiddled with his rings, twisting them as he looked at you with those big dark eyes.

“So first off, let’s talk about the book we’re reading in class. Have you read any of it?”

“I did read the first few chapters, kind of lost interest though, sorry,” he admitted.

You nodded curtly. “The Catcher in the Rye seems to be a fairly polarizing book from my experience. Some students love it, others hate it. I myself am in the former camp, of course. I tend to find that most of the people who don’t like it just don’t quite understand it.”

Eddie gave a short puff of air through his nose. “I could say the same thing about most of the shit I’m interested in.”  

You smiled sympathetically. “Is reading not really your thing?”

“Actually, contrary to the opinion of a certain primate, I do like to read.”

You raised your eyebrows, “Really? Like what?”

“Fantasy mostly, The Lord of the Rings, really anything Tolkien writes. I’ve read those books a few times through actually,” he said, “Probably kind of stupid to read the same thing over and over when you could be reading other things, but — ”

“No, that’s not stupid at all! I’ve read them more than once too, actually.” Your eyes were sparkling. “They’re some of my favorites.”

Eddie sat back in his chair, a smile playing on his lips. “You? A geek? Never would have guessed.”

You smirked at him. You couldn’t quite tell if he was being sarcastic or serious. “Actually incorporating world building with storytelling the way that Tolkien does is something I’ve always tried to emulate in my own writing.”

“Your own writing?” Eddie shifted in his chair, leaning in.

“Oh, yeah,” you said, glancing downward, wishing you could suck the words back into your mouth.  

“You write books?”

“I… don’t know if you could quite call them books if they aren’t published, or totally finished but — I do like to write stories.”

Eddie’s eyes were enormous. “Can I read them? Oh please let me read them.”

The heat was back in your cheeks again. “Oh jeez, I don’t know, it’s been ages since I’ve even looked at them myself.”

Eddie leaned in even more, his elbows on the desk. “Come on,” his smile was so disarming, “What,  you think I’m gonna like, judge you or something?”

You looked down at the papers you were grading and clicked the pen in your hand. “I don’t know, writing is such an oddly… personal thing.” 

“Please? You know I’m like the last person to be passing judgement on something like that, right?”

You sighed. His eyes were big, and wet, and pleading and you cursed yourself for being stirred by them. “Ok, how about this, if you can get your grades up, get at least a B in one of your classes, I’ll let you read one of my stories.”

Eddie sat back in his chair, grinning from ear to ear. “Challenge accepted.”

You tucked your hair behind your ear as you met his smile, “Whatever motivates you,” you said trying not to think too hard about the implications of the deal you just made. “You know, what I really want to talk about is the creative writing assignment you turned in the first week of class.”

He raised his eyebrows. “That bad, huh?”  

“No! Actually not bad at all. Actually quite good. You’re very creative, Eddie.”

“Oh is that what they’re calling it these days?” he deflected.

“No, I’m serious. You’ve written stories before, haven’t you?”

“Well, I am the dungeon master for my DnD club.”

You squinted your eyes curiously at him.

“Oh! So basically, I come up with the plot of the story that they players are going to play. I create the world essentially, lead them through the story. Well, to some extent. The monsters are all from a guidebook but the plot is all me.”

You raised your eyebrows. “Creativity and leadership.”

Eddie chuckled and scratched the back of his head to distract from the heat creeping across his cheeks. “Yeah, well, doesn’t change the fact that I’m 20 years old and still in high school.”

“About that,” you started, “Why do you want to graduate? Maybe if you can identify the reason for reaching your goal, then you can find the motivation to work toward it. Besides wanting to read my stories anyway, like a personal reason.”

Eddie sat back in his chair for a moment, biting his lip in thought. “Uhh, maybe to prove all the assholes in this god forsaken purgatory wrong?”

You laughed, probably a bit too hard. “I think that’s an excellent reason.”

Eddie beamed. “See, I knew I liked you.”

You coyly returned his smile and fidgeted with the pen in your hand again. “Let’s figure out a day or two when we can meet weekly. Got any after school conflicts?”

“My band plays at the Hideout Tuesday nights, Fridays I’ve got Hellfire Club.”

“How about Mondays and Wednesdays then? Does that work for you?”

“Sure does.”

“Great, and I can help you with other classes too, to the best of my ability anyway. Show you how best to study, how to approach papers and essays — that sort of stuff.”

“Looking forward to it,” he said softly.

 The feeling in your stomach was back again. “Me too.”

______

Thank you so much for reading, tons more to come! Comments and reblogs keep me going! 🙏

Tag list: @ooo-protean-ooo @toxicjayhoo @mermaidsandcats29 @jadequeen88 @msgexymunson @wroteclassicaly @inknopewetrust @storiesbyrhi @kissmyacdc @cherry-vamps @willgrahamspsycheval

There are some of you are on this list who I talked to about this months ago! Sorry it took me a while to get this up but I’ve spent the last month outlining this monstrosity. That’s mostly out of the way now so updates should be pretty regular, like once a week. 💕

[marithlizard]

I just read the best comment about "Full Moon" over on youtube, and had to share it here. Spot on and witty to boot.

"I usually can't stand the misunderstanding/miscommunication trope because it can always be solved with a conversation, but...what Helluva Boss showed is single-handedly the most realistic, true-to-life, and genuinely damaging-to-a-relationship misunderstanding I've seen in a very long time. Both Stolas and Blitz just don't know each other. Their communication languages are so different at a base level that they only just started to get on the same page in the last couple of seconds of talking (before Stolas cut Blitz off by teleporting him outside). Blitz sees Stolas as this powerful, god-like royal being who treats him like a pet or a toy (as shown in Blitz's drug trip from "Truth Seekers"), and Stolas sees Blitz as a wounded lone wolf or lone moon drifting in space when not tethered to the Earth (Stolas) as seen in "Look My Way". Blitz and Stolas were tailoring their communications based on their flawed perceptions of the other person. Stolas was gentle and very clear and vulnerable because he thought he was in a BL slice of life drama, and Blitz shouted and yelled at the godlike royal who dared to see him as a toy because Blitz thought he was in a shonen with an overall theme of classism. I can't imagine how hurt Stolas feels thinking back to all of the times he was so vulnerable with Blitz only to realize that Blitz saw it all as a king commanding a servant to service him. I also can't imagine how blindsided Blitz feels upon realizing that Stolas genuinely loves him and having the rug ripped out beneath him because Blitz didn't react in the correct way or because Blitz just acted according to how he understood their reality. Stolas had no idea he was cast as the depraved villain in Blitz's head, and Blitz had no idea he was cast as the dreamy bad boy love interest in Stolas's head. I'm struck with the narrative juxtaposition all over again. I can't help but love it."

And that's the core, isn't it? Blitzo and Stolas haven't been talking to each other since Ozzie's, and maybe not ever. They've each been talking to their own imaginary version of the other. (This is frighteningly easy to do and guaranteed to fuck up any sort of relationship, and I don't think I've seen it portrayed this well before. The worst part is that you only realize you've been doing it when the illusion breaks, and then it's usually too late to fix things.)

[lesbian-kyoru]

skip and loafer chapter 55 thoughts

this chapter was so poignant but one aspect that stood out to me was all it told us about mika & mukai's dynamic so far!

mukai followed along on a whim & subsequently ended up witnessing a lot of vulnerability on mika's end, someone who he still doesn't have a good grasp on yet—after seeing her worst + being surprised by her capacity for kindness, his perception of her is continually being challenged & muddled. we've seen already how mukai is a very logical, cut & dry person in his thinking, so imo mika's Layers are both confusing & intriguing to him.

at the same time i thought it was interesting how mukai realizes that mika ALSO doesn't have a clear perception of him—though their scenes always feel very Intentional, they actually have not interacted a ton within the context of the friend group, esp given their rocky start.

so from there, we get this juxtaposition within mika & mukai's relationship where they are v unsure of each other and yet there's an odd sense of trust there. it's definitely not an ACTIVE trust, but something more peripheral; mika doesn't mind mukai being there while she talks to nao because, in her mind, mukai already knows abt this insecurity so she isn't revealing anything new to him. after opening up to nao, she apologizes to mukai for getting him caught up in her venting; despite this, it really struck me how this felt like such growth for her to simply move on rather than carrying the feeling around shamefully. it's like a weight lifts off mika's shoulders & it's cathartic for this to happen in front of mukai, who was the accidental catalyst for her confession to shima. mukai, in contrast, seems more unsure than ever.

he's puzzled to realize that mika's confession to shima wasn't fueled by a desire for reciprocation but rather the courage it took her to express her feelings openly, instead of always attempting to hide behind a facade & never experience the vulnerability in risking rejection. we know that mukai's experience of romantic confessions is almost entirely filtered through shima, since he's never been confessed to himself—and it's interesting how mika's confession to shima directly flies in the face of how negatively shima feels about being confessed to.

for shima, girls confessing to him has always been a sign of what's expected of him, people wanting something specific FROM him rather than liking him as a person—now that mukai knows how drained that makes shima feel, it's interesting that he learns mika's reasons for confessing & how they're entirely different, motivated by a desire to be brave rather than expecting something of the other person. nevertheless, this leaves mukai with a lot of conflicting thoughts in his head about how a confession should make you feel. again, he's very logical, so the ambiguity is confusing to him! (and all of us honestly)

but then, back at the house, we see mika through mukai's point of view—she shoots him a look!—at which point he decides that he couldn't think of being confessed to as "not that great." i'm just gonna let that sit there :)

so with that!! i loooooved all this chapter gave us to work with in the development of these characters, esp mika & mukai's dynamic!!!! with a character like mukai who spends so much time as an observer, it's so fun to see him start to actually reflect on his own point of view within the story, like he feels himself going from being the background character in everyone's lives to really developing his own outlook—and it's all thanks to girl of all time mika egashira who inspires EVERYONE to think nine million thoughts trying to understand her.

[appleflavoredkitkats]

youve gotta let us know all your fave cfundy fics...the people need it...

hello anon . u have been bestowed a pin that says "best anon" for enabling me to talk about this fox a bunch more

1. banks of newfoundland by honeydowo

genuinely life-changing. writing style alone, i want to put it in my mouth.

but what makes the fic a genuine standout is that it's one of the first i've seen that encapsulates the concept of fundy as nationalism/l'manberg in a way that's super profound and super, super sad.

i love how fundy is portrayed in this. there's so much emotion in this fic, but it's explained in a very low and casual way that makes you feel more terrible for this guy. it's a cyclical showcase of fundy's tragedies, and how he can't even react to it in a visceral manner because it happens so frequently.

genuinely one of the most beautiful fundy fics out there. three years later and i still come back from this fic crying

2. be my home by neg_nancy

this one's a newer gem i found, one that portrays las nevadas as a "family" without making it fall into stereotypical family dynamics. i was simply put in awe by how well the author writes the connections and relationships the characters have with each other, imperfect and untrusting yet ultimately united for the same base causes

i specifically love the way they portray quackity. he's cunning and perceptive, knowing how to extract what he wants from his members without asking them directly. but what i absolutely love is how compassionate he is behind the sternness, and wow, i'm just absolutely floored by how he mobilizes fundy by the end

3. there is a quiet passing into silent, desolate pain (and no one is allowed to see) by readinglass

this one's depressing, but definitely unique. essentially, it's a fic about tommy witnessing fundy clean schlatt's grave. there's a ton of original, religious imagery in there, which i thinks taps into desperation in ways we don't often find with fundy

i love anything that looks into fundy and schlatt, and this not disappoint. it utilizes fundy's desperation and endless devotion to someone as a way to emphasize his ultimate loneliness. it is just so depressing, and the addition of tommy as both a character and a mirror to what we might be thinking is also so great

4. pandora's box by rabbitsintheclouds

saboo i miss u come back /j /lh

for real though, i know this is more of a c!dream fic more than anything, but the way fundy is used in the latter chapters is honestly so fascinating. the juxtaposition between fundy's optimistic, goofy, and unconditionally loving self and dream's charred-ness, memory loss, and pessimism makes for such a lively yet tense dynamic.

i promise you, this does not water down dream's abusive character to anything but that. but fundy reminds dream of what he's uncapable of being, which somewhat pacifies him a little. it hurts to see them relive dream after dream depicting end-world scenarios, especially considering how peppy and depressingly cheerful fundy is in these scenes

those about are my favorite fics but i suppose i can advertise my own as well. love of the fox is my ongoing one atm, a fix it of sorts that focuses on fundy and schlatt during las nevadas. i have 5 other fics, but i mostly stand by the fics "last resorts" and "one less sleepless night" the most. im too lazy to link those but just check em out on my ao3 :3

[aspoonofsugar]

Akane + Kana = Blue (Shadow) + Red (Light)

Here come 2 great girls and 2 great characters! Akane Kurokawa and Kana Arima are Aqua's 2 love interests, but more than that they are key for the story and themes of Oshi No Ko.

SHADOW AND LIGHT

Akane and Kana are linked to 2 opposite ideas:

Akane is a person who accepts others' shadows

Kana is a person who gives others hope and light

Akane is the most perceptive character in the manga. She is incredibly sensitive to the people around her and able to guess their secrets from little details. For example, she infers Ai's personal life by looking at some records. Not only that, but people feel they can trust Akane and share with her intimate information. This is true for both Aqua and Ruby:

Both siblings tell Akane a part of their previous selves' story. Akane doesn't ask for it, but listens to them. She is so accepting, she is even ready to compromise her morality for others:

She looks straight at people's darkness and doesn't flinch. She welcomes the shadow.

Kana is strongly associated with light:

The acting who makes her famous as a child is her ability to shine on the stage. Not only that, but she chooses white as her idol color and sings about becoming a full moon. She brings light into the night and helps others shine. So, she fittingly becomes a beacon of hope for both twins:

Aqua is drawn to Kana's cheerful and strong personality and wants to see more of it. Ruby wants to help Kana, even when she is going through her DarkRuby phase. For a moment, her friendship with Kana brings back Ruby's inner light.

So, Akane is so empathic she accepts people's flaws, while Kana is so cheerful she brings joy to people. Still, their juxtaposition doesn't stop at what they represent for others.

BLUE AND RED

Akane and Kana have opposite color schemes. Akane is blue and Kana is red. Blue and red are complementary colors and they are generally associated with different ideas:

blue is mind, shyness and introversion

red is heart, impulsiveness and extroversion

These personality traits fit Akane and Kana and their acting methods:

Akane studies alone and immers herself into the script. She looks inside:

Her acting is understanding the characters.

Kana reacts to the people around her and matches their performance. She looks outside:

Her acting is interpersonal relationships.

Akane is introspective and focuses on the characters (blue). Kana instead is reactive and focuses on the actors (red). That said, the 2 actresses' color juxtaposition hides an additional meaning:

Ai is purple, which is the combination of blue and red. Similarly, Akane and Kana (just like the twins) are 2 sides of Ai. Still, who is Ai?

I have never been loved by anyone Nor have I loved anyone else

Ai is a person who has never loved nor has ever been loved.

TO LOVE AND TO BE LOVED

To love and to be loved are the 2 sides of Ai (love). Akane and Kana too explore these 2 concepts.

Akane is surrounded by people who love her. Her parents genuinelly want her to be happy and they support her career and relationships. The same goes for her manager. Still, when Akane gets cyber-bullied, she struggles to call for help. Not only that, but later on she states she is not sure she loves Aqua:

In short, Akane has trouble understanding relationships and approaches them in the most complicated way possible. She admires Kana and wants for her to shine again. Instead of conveying her feelings properly, though, she starts a rivalry. She wishes to help Aqua and to build a relationship with him. Still, she both lies and silently accepts Aqua's lies.

Kana is instead very upfront with her feelings, but she ignores people's darkest sides, which makes her easy to manipulate. After all, Kana often gives in to others' requests, even if it is not what she wants. This tendency stems from trauma:

As a small child, Kana is abandoned by the adults around her because she stops being an asset. Both her mother and manager ditch her and nobody gives her work anymore. As a result, Kana becomes a push-over in the hope of being accepted.

So, both Akane and Kana have self-issues which prevent them from developing healthy relationships. Akane doesn't know how to love, while Kana fears to be unloved. These 2 complexes make so that Ai gets sometimes reborn in the 2 girls:

Akane is actress Ai, the genius performer, who lies to both others and herself

Kana is idol Ai, the girl, who shines brightly in her genuine search for love

Akane and Kana's similarity with Ai is why Aqua feels drawn to both in different ways. He projects his mother on his 2 love interests. However, Akane and Kana are not Ai, but their own people. So, their arcs break this dychotomy between them and show that they are 2 girls growing up. Not only that, but they are deep down very alike.

AKANE = BLUE + RED

Akane is associated with blue (blue hair and eyes), but her name means red. Why is there this contradiction? A possible answer is that Akane is strongly disconnected from herself. Or to better say, Akane has no idea of who she is. This is precisely why she struggles so much throughout her introductory arc.

True Love is a reality show, where the participants have to play themselves and flirt with others. For example, Yuki uses her true feelings as an inspiration for her performance. However, Akane can't do the same because she is confused by romance and lacks a personality of her own. This is why she is a genius actress. She forgets herself and becomes someone else. It is Akane's modus operandi and she eventually uses it also in True Love. And who does she become?

She plays Aqua's ideal girl. Not only that, but she keeps on this role throughout time, as she becomes more involved in Aqua's revenge plot:

Akane knows Aqua is not in love with her. Still, she decides it is fine to be used, as long as she is aware of it. Later on, she realizes Aqua has feelings for Kana, but accepts them in exchange of his honesty. Akane believes that with time her bond with Aqua will become the real thing. However, she is wrong, as a lie stays a lie:

In the end, neither Aqua nor Akane are honest with each other. Aqua violates Akane's privacy and Akane keeps silent about Aqua's father. She decides to solve things by herself, just like she did with the cyber-bullying. Akane is full of people who love her, but she refuses to depend on them. She tries to deal with everything alone and puts her life in danger:

She is very much like Aqua in this, which is why the moment they come clear they break-up. Akane and Aqua genuinely care for each other. However, they can't have a proper relationship because they choose to lie and to self-sacrifice.

Akane gives up her whole sense of self to properly play the part of Ai. Still, she isn't Ai and her break-up with Aqua is the perfect chance to realize it. Right now, she is determined to save Aqua by herself. She still believes she can be Aqua's perfect girl, one way or another. However, she is wrong. She can't and shouldn't save Aqua alone. She should open up to others and ask for help. In this way, she can finally break character and show her genuine self. She can embrace her inner red.

KANA = LIGHT + SHADOW

Kana is linked to light, but she is currently stuck in shadows both in her career and in her personal relationships. This is made clear since her introductory arc.

Sweet Today is a low budget production whose real goal isn't to tell a good story, but rather to advertise models. Kana is chosen because of her good personality and fame. She sees this as an opportunity and a sign of appreciation. However, the producer's words reveal she is being taken advantage of. Nobody cares about her second chance in the enterteinment world, but they only use her because she is convenient. Not only that, but Kana is forced to match the other cast members' level of acting. The result is that she hides her real self.

Luckily, Aqua is there for Kana and eventually she is able to shine a little:

This is a recurring dynamic between Kana and Aqua. Kana tries to hide her real talent for the sake of harmony on the stage. However, Aqua takes care of things, so that Kana can shine:

In short, Aqua is a healing presence in Kana's life. She feels invisible and unwanted to the point she is ready to do anything for some care and appreciation. However, Aqua gives her selfless support:

Still, Kana herself is unaware of Aqua's shadows:

She has known him for a long time, but knows nothing of his revenge plan, his past as Gorou and his manipulative streak. It is telling that when Aqua masks as Piyo Kana is unable to see through the mask. She can't because she doesn't know who the real Aqua is.

Here it comes a contradiction in Kana's arc. Among all the characters, she is the one mostly linked to truth:

She is so honest she makes her feelings for Aqua clear five minutes after meeting him. She even ends up confessing her crush on a stranger out of loyalty towards Aqua and her own emotions. Not to mention that it is to protect her that Aqua reveals the truth about Ai. And yet, she is kept in the dark of others' machinations. She is oblivious to her friends' struggles and seems not to notice their strange behaviours.

So, her arc should really be about overcoming this flaw. If Kana wants to shine, she needs to experience shadows. If she wants to have healthy bonds with others, she needs to discover and accept their darkness. She is slowly going through this process.

As a child, she shines, but is self-centered. When she grows up, she painfully realizes she has to value others more and becomes much more selfless. However, at the beginning of the series, she is being consumed by this approach and is helped by others to re-discover her selfish self a little bit more. She realizes she is beautiful when she steals everyone's attention and that her brutal honesty can help people grow.

Right now, she needs to reconcile her caring personality with her personal need to shine. Her trust in people with the knowledge even her loved ones can make mistakes. In short, she must find a way to shine, while helping others to shine too:

She doesn't have to sacrifice herself to be accepted, but at the same time Kana herself is at her happiest when all the actors play together to the utmost of their abilities. She must be the sun who selflessly makes others shine.

AKANE AND KANA'S ENDINGS

So, what will be the conclusion of Akane and Kana's stories? So far, it is too soon to say, but some hypothesis can be made.

First thing first, let's address the elephant in the room. I think Akane, Kana and Aqua's love triangle will resolve in Kana's favor. Imo the story has been very clear about it.

Aqua's reaction to Akane and Kana is opposite:

He involves himself with Akane to pursue his revenge and he is drawn to her because she resembles Ai

He stays away from Kana because of his revenge and his fear Kana is gonna end up targeted like Ai

In short, Aqua projects on both girls with different results. He projects on Akane his wishes and on Kana his fears. So, it makes sense that by the end he lets go of Ai's ideal (he says goodbye to Akane) and overcomes his fears (he acts on his feelings for Kana).

Of course, recently, there has been a shift in this dynamic. Aqua has in fact broken his bond with Akane to protect her, while he has started a manipulative relationship with Kana. Still, this inversion is due to the story entering its climax. It is in fact necessary to challenge all the characters.

Structurally, Akane and Kana do not have the same focus. Akane's storyline serves Aqua and Kana beautifully. She supports their arcs, while developing herself. Kana instead is the tritragonist of the manga. A lot of focus is given to her feelings and career each arc. Moreover, these plotlines have nothing to do with the main conflict, which means Kana is basically having her own story. Still, obviously Kana's story and the main plot are meant to become one in the climax. So, she is meant to have a big role in Aqua's arc.

Finally, a conclusion where Aqua and Kana are together fits both girls' individual arcs.

Akane should stop imitating others and discover who she is. For her to succeed she should go back to what she originally desired:

Akane's true desire is a genuine connection. She starts acting not because she thinks it is cool, but because she wants to become friends with Kana. However, Akane's strategy to grow closer to others is to change herself and become an ideal:

She wants to win Kana's friendship by becoming like her. And yet, this backfires as Kana is already struggling with people discarding her to favor other children. Surely, a girl who imitates her is not the kind of friend Kana wants by that point. Interestingly, Akane is mature enough to figure this out and doesn't really resent Kana for it. To the contrary, she deep down wants Kana to go back to shine, but her attempts to inspire Kana do not work. So, what can Akane do to grow close to Kana and help her shine?

Maybe Akane simply has to tell Kana the truth about Aqua. She could let go of her stubborness and open up to another person. After all, the only way to forge bonds is to show who you are and hope the other will accept you.

Such a resolution on Akane's part would help Kana. Kana's problem is that she ignores everyone's shadows. She can't hope to help her loved ones if she has no idea of who they are. Kana's test will be to accept Aqua's darkest part and to keep on loving him.

She will 100% succeed. Kana is great at pursuing what she loves, even when it's not perfect. She is the character who has been a part of the enterteinment world the longest. She has been broken and let down many times. However, she still loves acting and the people she meets in her job. She may not be a genius anymore, but she is a strong, dependable and flexible actress. She likes the enterteinment world despite its flaws and will keep on loving the twins and Akane.

This is why Kana is the brightest star:

She has more passion and attachment to life than everyone else.

[closetsof-backlogged-dreams]

a Mai-Azula-Ty Lee analysis bc i have Many feelings

so this is definitely super random for my blog, but i just rewatched the boiling rock (bc ofc i did lmao) and i've been obsessed w this quote since like age ten, but it just hit different this time around and i feel the need to share:

"You miscalculated. I love Zuko more than I fear you."

so. here's the thing. this quote is objectively insane for a million reasons, but i want to talk about some of the parallels we can pull from it bc imo it makes it so. much. WORSE.

"No, you miscalculated! You should have feared me more!"

here comes the main theme of this post: fear, juxtaposed with love.

i do genuinely believe that Azula loved Mai and Ty Lee. not in the way typical friends love one another, because Azula is not a typical person who learned to love in a typical way, but love nonetheless.

(we can trace this back to her relationship with her father VS her relationship with her mother. Azula had a very distinctive way of looking at her childhood: she was her father's daughter, and Zuko was her mother's son. while we never saw Azula's reaction to his banishment, whether it was positive or negative, this surely cemented this idea for her. once their mother was gone, her father had no use for him. but of course he still had use for her—he loved her.

and if her father loved her, in a father-daughter relationship fueled by fear and intimidation, and her mother didn't, in a mother-daughter relationship that wasn't, what do you think she learned of love? but we'll bring this idea back later.)

she loved them, and she trusted them, and they betrayed her.

but before i really dig into the quote, i want to go over this love-fear juxtaposition, because it is a common theme throughout her character arc as she spirals further and further.

this scene is set after the betrayal, and the fact that they brought in a hallucination of her mother is very, very important.

once again, these opposing feelings of fear and love are brought back again. before, i said that Ursa and Azula's relationship wasn't fueled by fear. but is that true? Azula says very clearly here that her mother fears her and thinks that she's a monster. And this hallucination of her mother, a figment of all her worst fears and regrets and internal conflicts, brings up Mai and Ty Lee.

And then:

Even you fear me. No. I love you, Azula. I do.

"even you fear me" "no. i love you"? this is so, so crucial to what we know about Azula and her perception of love. she views love and fear to be very closely linked, even intertwined, not something to be separated in such a way.

even you fear me — but do you love me? i don't know if you do. but you fearing me does not stop you from loving me. they are not separate entities. i do not know how to be loved if i am not feared.

no. i love you — you are my daughter. i do not fear you. i love you. they can be separate. i love you without fearing you. no, i do not fear you. i love you.

and this is Azula's breaking point. tears stream down her face and she shatters the mirror. this separation of fear and love—it's too much. she doesn't know how to handle it. she knows fear without love, but she does not know love without fear.

her relationship with Zuko is another prime example. i fully believe that Azula loved her brother, or at least cared for him in some capacity. you see it in scenes such as these:

she had no reasonable ulterior motive here. she genuinely was trying to help him and look after him—but he's also afraid of her. he's afraid of what she might do or what she wants from him, even if in this particular scene that fear is unnecessary.

even when she recruited Ty Lee, she used fear to get Ty Lee to join her:

Ty Lee is legitimately happy to see Azula, but you can see the fear on her face when she turns down Azula's offer to search for the Avatar. and then, you can see that fear again when Azula tells her she'll be attending her show. and of course, Azula sets the net on fire, and Ty Lee ends up accepting Azula's offer.

i do believe Ty Lee and Azula had genuine love for one another, but Azula just never knew how to have that love without the fear.

and finally, we come back to the quote.

I love Zuko more than I fear you. / You should've feared me more.

or: I love Zuko more than I love you. / You should've loved me more.

the use of the word "miscalculated" fits perfectly here. everyone adores Azula. she's the prodigy, the crown princess, the Fire Nation's darling. no one is supposed to love Zuko. Zuko is the failure, the banished prince, their nation's greatest shame.

you miscalculated. you were supposed to love me. you were my friend. you were my ally. i trusted you. i made you fear me. you were supposed to love me. no one loves Zuko. everyone loves me.

you miscalculated. love doesn't work like that. love doesn't come with fear. fear chases love away. you made me fear you. you made me hate you. i chose Zuko, because you don't know how to love.

and it all always comes back to Zuko, doesn't it?

but i'm yours. Zuko was mother's, and mother is long gone, and see, Zuko was a traitor. Zuko was nothing. you treated Zuko terribly because Zuko wasn't yours. but i am. i am your daughter. i am your prodigy. i am your princess. i am your heir. how dare you treat me like him. like nothing. how dare you.

i also believe that this was the true final blow that sent her spiraling into her downfall. she's extremely vulnerable here: her two most trusted friends and allies have just betrayed her, and here it is, another betrayal. where she is usually cool and collected, she is snappy and hot-headed, here.

his betrayal is quickly and immediately rectified when he informs her she will become the new Firelord. see, she's not like Zuko. Zuko is banished with no crown and no legacy. she is different. she is her father's child. Zuko is her mother's. she gets the throne. he gets nothing.

but Mai still chose Zuko. and she was absolutely furious, of course, but even this she could still handle. it's what happens after that she can't.

The thing I don't understand is why. Why would you do it?

why would you choose him? why would you choose Zuko? only one person ever chose Zuko: Mother. but she doesn't matter. she's gone. but why. why. (why do they keep choosing Zuko?)

and then, probably my favorite shot in the entire series:

Ty Lee looks at Mai, then Azula. it's barely a second long, but it speaks volumes. she's making a decision. Mai, or Azula? Mai, or Azula?

throughout our time with Ozai's Angels, it's obvious that Ty Lee is Azula's right hand woman. she goes with her everywhere. even in this scene, Ty Lee is right next to Azula the whole time.

and Mai chose Zuko. Mai chose Zuko. she says that "I love Zuko more than I love you" and she should've loved her more, and so now Azula is going to kill her. she's about to summon her lightning, and—

so Ty Lee chose Mai. and Mai chose Zuko. and her mother chose Zuko. and Azula chose her father and her nation and her ambition, and she thought her father chose her, and he did, he did.

thing about Azula: she loves. she loves Zuko, and she loves Ty Lee, and she loves Mai. but she doesn't prioritize her love the way Zuko does. her love comes last. her father comes before her love. before her father, her nation. but before all of that, her ambition.

for her ambition to ever come to fruition, she needs fear, doesn't she?

and Zuko fears her.

so she wins. right?

wrong.

she loses.

she gave up everything, absolutely everything, and she. still. loses. to fucking Zuko.

he won their mother's love. he won Mai. he, indirectly, won Ty Lee. and now he won the crown, her crown.

Azula, born lucky, born a prodigy, never wins.

[oddygaul]

Hacks, S3

woof… me and my partner were talking about how much more cozy and relaxing this season was than the rest of Hacks, then we hit the second half. That ending was brutal.

This season is an odd juxtaposition of characters who have clearly learned and evolved, but who can't let go of one particular thing that ultimately undoes all that progress. Throughout season 3, Ava seems more stable, self-assured, and compassionate than she’s ever been. Before, it was sometimes hard to stay in her corner - for every moment I’d agree with her, she’d go and do something frustratingly short-sighted or shallow. Now, she seems to have grown so much. Every time she has one of her little pick-me-up sessions with Deborah this season, I was amazed at how empathetic and understanding she was - and not just using buzzwords like before, but actually understanding what they mean and how to provide support for someone.

At the same time, her rekindling of her relationship with Deborah is essentially a relapse. Even though she’s become wiser, and understands much more of what she personally needs from a relationship, we watch her give up everything she’s built on her own since being fired and crawl right back to Deborah. Honestly, it feels like the series’ backbone at this point is codependent toxic relationships, rather than the gender gap as it pertains to public perception, the workforce, and aging.

It felt like such a backslide that I was expecting Ava to, at some point, realize she deserves better than this and leave on her own terms. I was genuinely pretty shocked that the conclusion was Ava instead embracing the dark side and moving forward as Deborah’s writer. It’s a big, defining character moment, a fork in the road - a deliberate choice to embrace all of the negative traits she’s learned from Deborah, rather than rejecting Deborah’s belief that success only comes from ruthlessness.

In any case, this feels like the moment of the show’s arc where Ava might supersede Deborah. Despite inherently connecting with Ava’s character more due to age and my place in life, I’ve always regarded Deborah Vance as the real main character of this show; her life, past, and psyche are always center stage, with the other characters largely existing to provide impetus to explore them more deeply. This moment, though, may mark a turning point where Hacks becomes more about Ava and her ascension - and about Deborah leaving behind a legacy of not just what she’s accomplished, but who she’s created in her image.

[roobylavender]

something tangential to the enforced motherhood post i reblogged but while dc's contention with this concept is pretty horrid and distasteful in general what i find worse is the fan reaction in batman circles, specifically with regards to talia and selina. on one hand, you have the very obvious projection of a racist and xenophobic trope onto talia where she is stripped of any and all personal agency and to the point her character can never be severed of motherhood or even worse only viewed as an abusive party within the concept. fans not only project their own experiences of abuse onto her despite these projections being contrary to her own ambitions and writing prior to her character assassination; they also, in the event they don't want her to be an abusive mother, decide to relegate her to a static concept of motherhood where she has no existence outside of raising damian and where there isn't even a possibility of toying with the idea that she may not have actually acquiesced to the concept of motherhood to begin with. i'm always so surprised by how little people seem to contextualize the life talia led as lex corp ceo with her potential role as a mother. how would she be able to live that kind of isolated, purpose-driven life where she could set every personal desire aside for the sake of her duty to the world if she was expected to parent a child first? this is a rare viewpoint i've never really seen expressed but one reason i find morrison's portrayal of bruce and talia as parents to be really ironic is bc i think the roles are nearly reversed. at that point in her life and with the slew of burdens and responsibilities on her shoulders i honestly think talia (regardless of what immense affection i'm sure she would have for her own child) would be the one who had trouble acclimatizing to her role as a parent, versus bruce who made it his intent for several years to parent various children and when he found out talia was pregnant impliedly committed to shielding that child (and her) from violence and a vigilante life at all costs. it's a narrative thread i really would have loved to see explored but on a practical level would likely be impossible to do not only bc of dc's handling of asian mothers and their racist degradation due to their juxtaposition against white fathers, but also bc of dc and dc fans' constricted view of motherhood to begin with. either you're a good mother or you're a bad mother. there's no room for the in-between nuance of possibly loving your child but not knowing how to balance that responsibility bc of what you view as important responsibilities you have to others

on the other hand, you have dc fans' engagement with selina's relationships with younger orphans and sex workers in her community. this is a really interesting one to dissect in light of ship wars specifically bc while i agree that there isn't any sense in having selina act as a mother-figure to bruce's children i also don't really agree with people's justification that she's not a "motherly" character. it's once again a very striking example of the restricted perception people have of motherhood or of behaviors commonly associated with that role, bc i don't think people who say this are really criticizing her ability to be a mother at all. what they're actually criticizing is her capacity to care. there's oddly all too many people who believe selina's anarchy or more self-serving nature is antithetical to any expression of compassion. so what you end up having is a phenomenon where one group of fans is eager to see her co-parent with bruce and another group of fans is eager to see her severed of any significant connections at all bc it somehow fits her "villainous" nature. and all-in-all, from both sides, her relationships with kids like holly and arizona are completely obscured. there's no room made to discuss how selina can possess deep empathy for young people whose experiences she identifies with and that she can care for them and even take them under her wing without necessarily wanting to adopt them, but that if she wanted, maybe she would adopt them. i honestly feel like that was the direction alan grant and doug moench were going in with arizona in the early 90s had mary jo duffy not abruptly excised arizona bc, like a lot of fans, she thought having significant emotional attachments was antithetical to the catwoman persona albeit there was no actual canon to back that notion on a behavioral level. i don't think selina has to be a mother, but i also don't think it's an infliction of stereotypical gender roles on her to imagine a scenario where she might adopt a stray, esp if that scenario occurs within a context where she is still independent and forging her own way of life and liberty. if anything, taking care of holly and arizona were some of the highest points of her narrative, bc they were a looking glass through which to explore selina's capacity for love and mercy, in spite of all of the trauma and abuse that she had to suffer at the hands of others

to me, the problem with dc's contention with motherhood is not so much that it's attached to these women at all, but that the definition of motherhood used is entirely framed with a heteronormative understanding of the family unit, despite the reams of potential to explore characters like talia and selina as independent figures acting outside of that traditional hierarchy

[makingspiritualityreal]

Making Spirituality Real Vedic Astrology Masterpost

A list of references linking directly to my Writing strictly on Vedic Astrology.

Return to General Masterpost Here.

Nakshatra Masterpost

Vedic Basics

Bhava Karakas - Decoding Astrological House Potential

Case Study of Mula Galactic Center Ayanamsa

Dharma, Atma, Kama, Moksha - Your Soul’s Desire

Introduction to Nakshatras

Nakshatra Gana - Deva, Rakshasa, Manushya

Nakshatra Planetary Rulerships and their Meaning

Natural Planetary Sight in the Chart - Derivative Houses / Parashara’s Aspects

Vedic Astrology - The Ultimate Truth for the Worthy?

What do you talk about in your private readings and can they be Vedic ?

What does a Karaka (producer) Mean in Vedic Astrology?

What is a Yoga Karaka planet?

Why Vedic Astrology will convince you Astrology is Real

Dasha Periods and Divisionals

Aries Planets in the Natal Chart and Divisional Charts - Break Ups and Blow Ups

Ashtakavarga Scores - how to “save” your low scoring planets

D9 Chart Activation Myth

Dasha Period Analysis Special - Planets Activated by Nakshatra Rulership

Dasha Periods - Natural Nakshatra Flow in your life

Interpreting Rahu and Ketu in context of Navamsa

Moola Dasha vs Nakshatra Dasha - Your Individual Planetary Timing

The Advantages of Divisional Charts in Vedic Astrology

Transit Influence on D9 Chart - An Important, yet often skipped Aspect of Vedic Astrology

Rahu and Ketu

Don’t Confuse Rahu Influence for Uranus Influence!

How does the Rahu “illusion” work?

How the Rahu - Ketu Axis matures throughout life - Development of Dispositor Houses

How to use the Lunar Nodes correctly?

Human Fears of Profitable Rahu

Ketu achieves Purity through Disgust with Excess

Ketu is a Graha that looks both Inwards and Backwards.

Ketu - Picky Like a Boss

Ketu = Ruled by Virgo?

Rahu and Ketu both rule Different Types of Challenges.

Rahu and Ketu - Juxtaposition of their emotional responses to stressful situations

Rahu - Cold Blood

Rahu - Impressionable and Impressive

Rahu in our Charts is Where we have a Tendency to Rebel at all Costs, Sometimes Without a Cause

Rahu vs Lakshmi - Money, abundance and greed

Strong Nodal influence, even Malefic, is one of the Main Factors of being in the public eye. “Rags to Riches”.

The Difference Between Rahu and Ketu lies in the Element of Fear.

The Nodal Axis and the Morality Conflict

The Nodes - Ascesis Vs Hedonism

The Nodes - Spiritual Failsafe

The Nodes - Suffering while Caring

The Nodes of The Moon Filter Your Perception, Just like the Moon Itself

The Positive and Desirable quality of Rahu is its Ability to Create an Atmosphere in the Physical World.

Using your Instincts to Master Rahu and Ketu

Venus and Lunar Nodes interplay - Your Karmic Relationship Score

Which planet is Ketu most compatible with?

Why is Rahu friends with Mercury?

-*-

Always Judge Saturn Retrograde Periods by Retrogrades of other Planets in Saturn’s Karaka Houses Relative to the Ascendant.

Artha Houses (2, 6, 10) and Moksha Houses (4, 8, 12) require a completely opposite approach.

Don’t Panic if a Major Astrology Transit Starts and you don’t see any immediate changes.

Malefics Teach You Boundaries

Moksha Houses Contain within them an Interesting Conundrum.

Natal Jupiter Ketu Conjunction - A Risk for Every Blessing

Of all the Grahas where we Feel out of Control, Ketu and Saturn areas are where you Carry the Most Burden.

Physical vs Spiritual Survival in an Astrology Chart

Planetary Stages of the game of Morality

Rahu and Saturn Create a Unique Blend of Pressure and Fear.

Saturn is the first Nakshatra stage where we experience genuine success. It’s our moment of triumph.

The Planetary Life Cycle

The Power of Individuating

There are Very Specific Stages to Solid Manifestation, that are Achieved Between Rahu, Jupiter and Saturn Arcs.

The Transition between Rahu and Jupiter Redefines the Idea of Greatness.

Using the Right Colors for your dominant Nakshatra can Change your Life

Vedic Astrology Fashion Observation

Why are 2nd and 7th Houses called “Maraka”?

Your Chart is How you End Up

[haydenigmatic]

Hanniel (HAYN-yell) Amlinger (Connell)

Meet Hanniel, acknowledged but illegitimate, his lineage bears both the prestige of a Duke's blood and the stigma of a bastard's birth. His journey weaves through the courtly dances of power and prejudice, guided by the shadows of his parentage.

His face and voice claim are none other than Henry Cavill of course.

Family Dynamics:

Duke Gerard- The Father

Hanniel holds a strong physical resemblance to him, for which he is favoured over his other half-siblings. However, the favouritism has strained the Duke's relationship with his legitimate children, especially Roderick, the heir.

Lady Myrah- The Loving Mother

His primary source of love and support. Lady Myrah shielded him from the harsh realities of courtly life, fostering a deep bond until her untimely demise.

Baron Matous - The Strict Grandfather

Strongly disapproves of Gerard for dishonouring his daughter. Initially distant from Hanniel due to the circumstances of his birth, but later provides support when his mother passes away.

Lord Rigel- The Understanding Uncle

Served as a mediator between Hanniel and his grandfather, providing a link to his maternal side.

Duchess Naraina - The Hostile Stepmother

Hanniel's stepmother, adds to the family tension. She holds animosity towards him and contributes to the hostile environment within the Connells.

Half-Siblings:

Roderick (Half-Brother, Older): Gerard's heir and the half-brother who feels the weight of his father's expectations. He harbours resentment toward Hanniel for being favoured and sees him as a possible threat to his inheritance.

Dreana (Half-Sister, Younger): The younger half-sister who, influenced by the family dynamics, shares the resentment towards him. Their relationship is strained, and she struggles to understand her father's preference.

Ulric (Half-Brother, Youngest): The youngest half-brother, caught in the tension between the older siblings and the family dynamics. Ulric is still impressionable, and his feelings toward Hanniel are influenced by the prevalent animosity.

Some details about him:

He possesses an exceptionally keen sense of smell. This heightened olfactory perception, though not widely known, allows him to discern subtle scents and detect changes in his surroundings, making him unusually aware of his environment.

Is renowned not only for his exceptional swordsmanship but also for his courtly manners, a juxtaposition to his internal struggle with the shame of his bastard status.

Despite his prowess in combat, often avoids bloodshed when possible, having a distaste for unnecessary violence.

Apart from his pet hawk, is an expert falconer, having trained various birds of prey.

Struggles with confidence issues, especially when interacting with those of higher social standing or women he finds attractive.

Takes meticulous care of his sword, meticulously polishing and maintaining it. The blade, a symbol of his prowess as a knight, holds sentimental value beyond its practical use.

is more active during the night. Whether it's training, reading, or reflecting, he finds a sense of peace and solitude in the quiet hours after sunset.

In childhood, struggled with a stutter, especially when overwhelmed or anxious. Though he overcame it with time, the occasional stutter reappears in moments of extreme emotion or when he's at a loss for words.

His deep connection with his mother shaped his values and ideals. Her death served as a catalyst for his determination to prove his worth.

Despite the familial discord, his father continues to provide for him through his uncle, ensuring Hanniel's well-being without his grandfather's knowledge.

Firmly believes in redemption and second chances, an ethos he carries both on the battlefield and in matters of the heart.

Shares a deep bond with Damon, considering him a close friend. Unlike the societal prejudices that often accompany bastards, Damon sees him as a true companion, transcending the labels imposed by noble birth.

[ailelie]

Different ways to lie

Pure deception: What you say is false and you know it

Omission: You leave out information that would change the listener's opinion or perception and you know it

Implication: You provide enough, often true information that your listeners create the lie in their heads. You never said it, but you knew what you were doing.

Juxtaposition: You place two truths next to each other so that your listeners intuit a relationship that you know does not exist.

False narratives: You cobble together fiction and fact into a story and convince your listeners of its veracity. This story warps their perception, hiding the truth from them even if you never say another word.

Double meanings: You use words that bend in multiple directions, knowing your listeners will believe you meant one of the false directions.

The truth: You tell the full truth, either plainly or in an off-hand manner that belies the reality of your words, knowing that your listeners will not believe you or that they will believe you are exaggerating or being purposefully dramatic.

[esther-dot]

What do you think about song Bear and the Maiden Fair? While the bear is described as brown and black with hairs while the maid described as honey in her hair and pure. Many think that song is about Hound and Sansa because he saved her when other knights couldn't but the bear in song didn't seems to saver as it tastes the honey of maid when she was shrieking and kicking. Seems like forced touching just like Hound forcing on Sansa. Tyrion, Penny and Jorah had played the characters in Meereen.

I also received this ask about the song:

(These are so old, neither of you may be around anymore, but I finally typed up some thoughts on this. Sorry for how belated this is! 😬)

I would assume that the reason so many relationships have a connection to the song is that Martin has an interest in developing relationships between extremes. At one point or another, he’s formed a relationship between youth/age, brother/enemy, beauty/ugliness, life/death, love/hate and I totally forgot the big one and had to circle back to add: ice and fire! Lmao). “Beauty and the Beast” is based on the interest in the juxtaposition of extremes, The Bear and the Maiden Fair offers something similar, so it makes sense to me that he repeatedly utilizes it.

The placement of extremes in relation to each other is an aesthetic thing some find compelling (created via The Hound’s size and scars against Sansa’s remarkable beauty and youth, Dany’s size, eye and hair color contrasted with Drogo or Jorah’s…), but more importantly, a thematic thing. We see the contrast vividly with Brienne and Jaime as well as Sansa and the Hound. Their appearance is at odds, of course, but what really matters are how their values are contrasted. Sansa’s beliefs and her nature are entirely opposed to the Hound’s, and if you think of Jorah as the knight exiled for being a slaver and the shame of his house helping the woman who attempts to end slavery (until she needs it) and restore her house…well, you get a version of that there too.

Being that Martin has stated he played with the Beauty and the Beast angle with Sansa and the Hound, but was surprised people shipped it, we should accept that Martin uses tropes/references for different purposes, not necessarily to signal an endgame romance or mutual interest even if that is the initial thought by the reader. Martin likes the inside/outside view of things, likes to examine ideas from multiple perspectives, and a character occupying different roles throughout the story allows him to extract a lot of meaning. Fans like to focus on how Sansa is wrong about a certain character, but the main intent behind all of this is the author challenging his reader when he forces us to examine and re-examine who characters are and what he is saying with them. The lyrics of the song twists our perception of things, so, even if I reject how it’s often applied, I agree that the concept behind the song is being discussed in these relationships.

We see the same beast/knight ideas with the Hound and Sansa as with Jorah and Dany. Both Dany and Sansa have these guys who are associated with specific animals (bear, hound), who function as protectors at some point even though they also betray them. Jorah’s betrayal is labeled as such in the book, but the Hound going from rescuing Sansa to assaulting her is a betrayal as well. Both men develop loyalty to the girls, they offer some protection, both have a sexual interest in the girls and both sexually harass them (Jorah kisses Dany without permission, the Hound assaults Sansa). I suppose Sansa and the Hound fit a little better with parts of the song because the girl is initially frightened by the bear while Jorah presents quite differently despite all the bear references. The bear-ish description of Jorah isn’t just the bear sigil, we also get all the hair stuff:

"I shall wish to speak with Ser Jorah before the night is done," her brother said. Dany found herself looking at the knight curiously. He was an older man, past forty and balding, but still strong and fit. Instead of silks and cottons, he wore wool and leather. His tunic was a dark green, embroidered with the likeness of a black bear standing on two legs. (AGOT, Daenerys I)

“He had a neck and shoulders like a bull, and coarse black hair covered his arms and chest so thickly that there was none left for his head.” (AGOT, Daenerys III)

and of course, he is referenced as a bear pretty often:

“Ser Jorah, her gruff old bear” (ADWD, Daenerys VI) and he’s referred to as her “bear knight” (ADWD, Daenerys III) and “My bear, she thought, my old sweet bear” (ADWD, Daenerys X).

I selected those from ADWD because to me, that’s when it for sure was deliberately connecting back to the song as Tyrion puts Jorah in the role of the bear:

"That one is part of our show. The bear and the maiden fair. Jorah is the bear, Penny is the maiden, I am the brave knight who rescues her. I dance about and hit him in the balls. Very funny." (ADWD, Tyrion X)

So, we begin the story knowing Jorah is a bear (Mormont), that he’s described as bear/beast, called a bear/bear knight, and then eventually, he’s playacting the bear from the song. Interestingly, the "knight" who fights the bear is acted by someone Martin has called a villain. I could never argue that the author isn’t being intentionally self-referential, he clearly is. However, we do have the fact that Jorah betrayed/molested Dany, and this:

Jorah Mormont's face was dark with anger, but he answered. "To serve her. Defend her. Die for her, if need be."

That made the widow laugh. "You want to rescue her, is that the way of it? From more enemies than I can name, with swords beyond count … this is what you'd have the poor widow believe? That you are a true and chivalrous Westerosi knight crossing half the world to come to the aid of this … well, she is no maiden, though she may still be fair." (ADWD, Tyrion VII)

I’m uncomfortable with the emphasis placed on virginity in the books and hate to use that (or beauty) as a determining factor in which couple the song is “really” about, but we have this line which I see as direct guidance from Martin about interpreting the Dany and Jorah relationship as a straight up version of The Bear and the Maiden Fair. The way it’s presented and challenged indicates that while in a particular dynamic or in a specific scene a character fulfills a certain role, that isn’t necessarily their overall role. To me, looking at the story as a whole, Brienne’s role is true knight, more so than maiden. Just as the idea that Dany is the maiden/damsel is present in her interactions with Jorah, but that isn’t her role in the story as a whole, no more than Jorah is the true knight. (He’s a slaver ffs).

As for the Jaime and Brienne of it, Jaime protecting Breinne from a bear slots him into the knight role, but as they struggle over who is fighting the bear, there’s a play on who is in the knight role and who is in the “maiden” role. Also, Brienne is mockingly called beauty and Jaime is described as a beast, and while those characters are being cruel to Brienne, to the reader, we know Jaime has done horrible things (attempted kid killing = monstrous), and we know Brienne is the purist soul (goodness=beauty), so taking a step away from the superficial, we are getting a layered play on the trope. And yes, Brienne is a virgin and Jaime a knight, we can leave it there, but Brienne is a knight in the truest sense and Jaime is beautiful, so I think the best way to look at this question of who this song is “about” is to accept that the trope being discussed is getting a rotisserie chicken treatment. We’re allowed to see it from every juicy angle, not limited to one. After all, Jorah is a knight and a bear.

Of course, as I already said, since the author likes to reference things without implementing them the way people expect, this doesn’t necessarily mean romantic endgame, but saying that doesn’t mean I’m dismissing Braime because I do think Martin wrote in the romantic stuff deliberately. The whole knights/fools etc is at play in that scene too:

"What are you doing here?"

"Something stupid. Get behind me." He circled toward her, putting himself between Brienne and the bear. (ASOS, Jaime VI)

Brienne is referenced as the maid in this scene, but later she reads like a knight on a quest to save the fair maiden --Sansa. We even get some “The Bear and the Maiden Fair” singing there. If they ever meet, I would expect some beauty/beast discussion to crop up just as part of this continuing conversation about roles, part of the characters revolving through them to allow the author to thoroughly analyze the ideas and evolve what fairytales are/say. In their pairing, Brienne would be the knight to Sansa’s maiden to allow for Martin to contrast Brienne with all of our failed knights.

We get a lot of duality with these characters/their roles which means we can ask, who is the knight/who is the bear and come up with many, many answers. All of them true in a certain light, only to then turn them on their head. Sometimes, a failed knight rises to the occasion, and sometimes the maiden saves the knight, and sometimes, the knights are evil, sometimes the knight isn’t a true knight. Sometimes salvation comes from where you least expect it, and sometimes, rescuers are also a threat. The roles are there, but Martin is playing with them, challenging them, so the multiple ways we can read these characters and dynamics is very much intentional. All of that being said, it’s undeniable that there is one maiden for whom the song is particularly relevant.

Sansa fits the maiden role in a much more overarching way than our other contenders. Not only because she’s a virgin, not simply because of her interest in romance or because so much of her story has been driven by various people’s sexual/political interest in her/marrying her, but because she represents certain attributes, foremost of them, mercy. We get in trouble when talking about how beautiful she is, but it can’t be disregarded because she represents hope, innocence, compassion, peace. Martin made her beautiful not just as a physical thing, rather, because she is representative of ideas; she is the beauty of certain ideals.

The Hound who laughs at killing children is moved to protect her, can’t follow through on his own desire to harm her. Dontos tells her,

"A knight?" Joffrey had decreed that he was to be a knight no longer, only a fool, lower even than Moon Boy. "I prayed to the gods for a knight to come save me," she said. "I prayed and prayed. Why would they send me a drunken old fool?"

"I deserve that, though . . . I know it's queer, but . . . all those years I was a knight, I was truly a fool, and now that I am a fool I think . . . I think I may find it in me to be a knight again, sweet lady. And all because of you . . . your grace, your courage. You saved me, not only from Joffrey, but from myself." (ACOK, Sansa II)

Personification is a thing and even though she is a multidimensional character, I think the way Martin has written Sansa makes it clear that he is calling back to old archetypes here which is why, when you hear “maiden fair,” Sansa is the referenced character in an overarching way, not just in a specific dynamic, not just in a specific chapter or one book, but in the series, this is who she is in a way that no other character is.

Her role in the story is notably the tropey damsel in distress/princess in the tower (in a way that Dany and Brienne are not), and even with the revision of what that means by a modern author, even with the idea growing and evolving into something new, with the girl having far more agency and inner life than in older stories, it’s so clear this is who she is that even her haters know it. They call her a princess in a tower to show their disdain, but all they’re doing is admitting that even they recognize who she is in the story.

And of course, there is the fact that Sansa is referred to as a fair maiden, even in her TWOW chapter, that her beauty is often remarked upon, and that she has some parallels with Persephone which seems pertinent due to the Beauty and the Beast/Hades and Persephone/Death and the Maiden connection:

Petyr cut a pomegranate in two with his dagger, offering half to Sansa. "You should try and eat, my lady."

"Thank you, my lord." Pomegranate seeds were so messy; Sansa chose a pear instead, and took a small delicate bite. It was very ripe. The juice ran down her chin. (ASOS,

LF is her uncle (by marriage), he spirits her away from KL and is clearly intent on making her his, and as we know, he’s orchestrated destruction for her family/the realm, so he fits in here as a kind of Hades (death) to Sansa’s maiden which is relevant considering how loosely related death and the maiden is to the beauty and the beast idea.

However, the thing that feels the most like the author directing us to a specific conclusion must be reading her first chapter in ASOS which might as well be called “the Bear and the Maiden Fair chapter” because we finally get the lyrics to the song, and it’s interspersed into a scenario that is kinda telling a similar story. Sansa wants a beautiful knight (Loras), but is offered a stranger instead (Willas). We’ve also just read a speedrun through all the fake knights/bears/suitors/“love interests” Sansa (or fans) have selected for her:

Sansa wondered if Joffrey knew of this supper. For all she knew, it might be his doing. That thought made her fearful. If Joff was behind the invitation, he would have some cruel jape planned to shame her in the older girl's eyes. Would he command his Kingsguard to strip her naked once again? The last time he had done that his uncle Tyrion had stopped him, but the Imp could not save her now.

No one can save me but my Florian. Ser Dontos had promised he would help her escape, but not until the night of Joffrey's wedding. The plans had been well laid, her dear devoted knight-turned-fool assured her; there was nothing to do until then but endure, and count the days.

[…]

Even so, she must accept. She was nothing now, the discarded daughter of a traitor and disgraced sister of a rebel lord. She could scarcely refuse Joffrey's queen-to-be.

I wish the Hound were here. The night of the battle, Sandor Clegane had come to her chambers to take her from the city, but Sansa had refused. Sometimes she lay awake at night, wondering if she'd been wise. She had his stained white cloak hidden in a cedar chest beneath her summer silks. She could not say why she'd kept it. (ASOS, Sansa I)

So, we have the prince who turned out to be a monster (Joffrey), the guy everyone thinks of as a monster who protects her (Tyrion), a knight who she saved but sexually harasses her (Dontos), a man who threatens her but ended up saving her only to then turn around and be a threat himself (The Hound). See what I mean about multiple roles? My gosh, it’s almost like the author has intentionally been writing variations of the song into Sansa’s story all along, or even, dare I say it, he's written Sansa’s story into a song, only, none of these match up perfectly, so we are still waiting for the true(est) incarnation of this song to manifest into her story.

Or, all of that shorter:

"I CALLED FOR A KNIGHT, BUT YOU'RE A BEAR! (ASOS, Sansa I)

"I prayed to the gods for a knight to come save me," she said. "I prayed and prayed. Why would they send me a drunken old fool?" (ACOK, Sansa II)

So, if Sansa is the maiden of the song, the maiden fair of A Song of Ice and Fire, who is the bear, who’s the knight? More importantly, where is this poor girl’s hero?

Y’all, this is getting ridiculously long. Now, I’ve never not done something for a silly reason like not wanting to appear ridiculous, but I can’t post seven thousand words all at once. tumblr staff will deactivate my account to save me from myself! I will get to Jon and the Jonsa of it all in part two.

[fairylandblog]

Faeries in Disguise

Throughout literature and mythology, the idea of faeries passing for people in the mortal world provides a rich tapestry of themes and stories. These stories frequently examine the nexus between the magical and the everyday, emphasizing the difference between faeries' ethereal quality and the grounded reality of human existence. This pattern represents life's duality and the depths that lie beneath the surface of ordinary reality. Traditionally portrayed as magical, otherworldly creatures, faeries actually have the ability to change their appearance and fit right in with human civilization. Not only may this shape-shifting capacity change physically, but it can also symbolize the flexibility and malleability of identity. Faeries traverse the complexities of human emotions, relationships, and societal standards by disguising themselves as humans; in the process, they frequently challenge and redefine these norms.

Faeries are frequently catalysts for change in the human world, both for those around them and for themselves. These creatures highlight the oddity and beauty of everyday life by shedding light on the human condition through their supernatural abilities and age-old knowledge. Through their interactions with humans, they make previously hidden options and hidden truths visible, which can lead to self-discovery and transformation. Belonging and estrangement are common themes in tales about faeries posing as humans. Even though they may blend in, faeries frequently experience a sense of otherness and yearning for their home world. This tension reflects the common human experience of feeling alienated from or detached from one's actual self. These kinds of stories inspire reflection, making people think about who they are and the masks they put on every day. Furthermore, the relationships between faeries and humans frequently emphasize how fleeting and delicate human life is. Faeries, in stark contrast to human existence's fleeting nature, provide a glimpse into the eternal, as they are creatures that exist outside of time. This juxtaposition serves as a reminder to people of the importance of cherishing each moment of life and the transience of existence. The tales of faeries in disguise also explore the nature of perception and reality. Because of their own prejudices and preconceptions, humans in these stories frequently fail to recognize the true identity of the faeries living among them. This theme emphasizes the idea that reality is arbitrary, and that there are often deeper realities hiding beneath the surface of what is initially apparent. It pushes the characters—and readers—to see past outward manifestations and reconsider their presumptions about the world.

Numerous stories reveal the true nature of a faerie, prompting the human characters to reevaluate their goals and way of life. It challenges individuals to reevaluate what is genuinely important, such as kindness, love, or the quest for knowledge. This realization frequently arouses feelings of awe and surprise, igniting the magic in the ordinary and fostering a fresh appreciation for life's secrets. To sum up, the idea of faeries posing as humans in the world of mortals is a potent storytelling device that delves into issues of perception, identity, and belonging. It invites readers to view the world with awe and possibility by bridging the gap between the mystical and the commonplace. Through these tales, faeries not only bring their presence to the human world, but also extend an invitation to people to set out on their own paths of self-awareness and personal growth.

[gold-rhine]

lol ik that i'm in the minority w how i see zhongli, it's just funny to me how the fandom vs my perception of him differs 🧐 also i guess i kind of phrased that thing about guili wrong, it's just like. the juxtaposition between guizhong, cloud retainer, ping (also sea gazer lmfao) arguing about whatever. and zhongli's there with his square cups ^.^ idk i think that i didn't make the tone of that ask too clear, that's on me

yeah the tone of ur ask was a bit too aggressively on "he's a grandpa, he was always a grandpa, why would anyone want to fuck him" side. also idk how from girls arguing follows that he was "giving them old man life advice" when he was young. when like zhongli\guizhong is strongly implied relationship in canon and you're sending that ask to a person whos written fics for it, you can see how that comes off weird asdfghjkl

[dawnsbreaking]

One of my favorite things about MLQC is the frequent use of symbolic imagery and motifs to set scenes and center characters. I think it’s incredibly clever, considering the importance of MC’s dreams, that the dreamlike symbolism is present throughout the story. At times, in MC’s confusion of piecing events together, reading the story almost feels like a sort of dream or vision interpretation. I love how consistent these symbols are for the characters and the way conflicting or contrasting imagery is used to add depth throughout the story. Also, since the story is told through MC’s perspective, the use of imagery shows us that her perception of the world is colored by her care for the main cast. When she’s with Gavin, MC notices fluttering leaves, when she’s with Victor, time slows, when she’s with Kiro, the sun is brighter, and when she’s with Lucien, she’s more attentive to light and shadow.

Under the cut, I have written more (1400ish words more) about symbolism in MLQC and how it adds depth to Lucien's characterization in particular.

Aside from adding to the mood of the story, the symbolism can also be used to narrative effect, showing us how MC is interpreting a character’s actions or motivations.

For example, we can look at how MC sorts through her feelings about Kiro/Helios in Chapter 29. Sun imagery pervaded previous chapters that centered Kiro while moon imagery is associated with Helios. In CH29, MC uses the harmony between the sun and moon as a metaphor when she accepts that Kiro and Helios are one and the same. This adds depth to what MC is feeling about Helios and also serves to contextualize the relationship between the two identities. (Note: I just love the idea that Helios has the same “sunshine” as Kiro but that he reflects it in a subtle way rather than being overwhelmingly positive like Kiro. This dynamic is only ever implied by the imagery and symbolism but it’s so perfect.)

In particular, though, I want to talk about some of the symbolism associated with Lucien and what we can learn from the way these symbols interact with one another.

Light and Shadow

One motif that is very present when the story is focused on Lucien is the balance between light and shadow. (Note: It’s very on the nose at times but executed well, I think, so I’ll give them a pass.) This motif is introduced far before Lucien’s betrayal is ever revealed, as early as his first meeting with MC. (Note: I literally wasn’t sure when the motif was first introduced but I went back to Lucien’s first scene and SURE ENOUGH, there it is. I love how consistent the writing is in this regard. The motifs are handled so well and so intentionally.)

During Lucien’s first scene in the game, light shining in from the window obscures his face. Far ahead of the betrayal, light and shadow are symbolically playing at obscuring his identity from MC. The light/shadow motif is used at first to symbolize Lucien being duplicitous, without much hinting toward his internal struggle. Later, when it’s clear that Lucien is struggling with a choice between metaphorical “dark” desire to continue his mission and “light” of protecting MC, light is used to hint at that internal conflict. An example of this is below, from Lucien's first standoff with Victor in Chapter 11.

Notably, though, sometimes, the “light” represents MC directly while the “shadow” represents Lucien. After Lucien’s internal conflict and desire to protect MC is first touched on in Chapter 16, the two are symbolically juxtaposed by scene-settings back-to-back in the last two units of CH16. 16-24 opens with a description of Lucien’s dark, gloomy room and 16-25 opens with a description of the lamp on MC’s desk casting a bright light. (Note: MC’s Evol is also represented by light often, so I think this imagery for her works even beyond its juxtaposition with Lucien.)

The same thing happens again when MC comes back from the Eternal Winter world, Lucien’s office is described as dark and shadowy when he is alone and then it’s cast in an “ephemeral glow” as soon as MC steps into the room.

Mirrors

A large part of Lucien’s character arc is his failure to properly make sense of his own identity, this struggle is represented by mirrors/reflections. Often, mirrors are shattered or distorted, implying an added difficulty of perception.

Because of the expectations that have been put on him from a young age, Lucien is very disconnected from his own identity. Even with Black Swan set completely aside, because of his savant-like personality and inability to relate to others, Lucien doesn’t view himself as a human being. Beyond that, there is also a struggle between the two identities of “Lucien” and “Ares” implied.

I think that the answer to this struggle is MC understanding Lucien and having clarity about who he is as a person. Light reflected in mirrors represents this concept symbolically in the Mirror Painting date. (Note: I believe this date is only currently available in the CN server, I read this translation) In this date, Lucien and MC paint each other and then use mirrors to reflect light onto the painting when it’s displayed. After being painted and, therefore, symbolically seen by MC, Lucien is finally allowed to turn away from the mirrors and stop worrying about who he is. The mirrors that represent his struggle with identity are able to add depth to a beautiful image when paired with the lights that represent MC’s understanding.

Shattered and Distorted Glass

This goes hand-in-hand with the mirror motif but is worth mentioning on its own because the symbolism is slightly different. While distorted mirrors imply difficulty for Lucien to perceive himself, distorted glass implies a difficulty for others to perceive Lucien. Shattered glass also represents a fractured relationship between the identities of “Lucien” and “Ares” in a few scenes.

On the wall of the abandoned Ultima Bioresearch Lab, MC finds a quotation written on the wall from the Bible. “For now we see through a glass, darkly. The truth is projected into the hearts of men through a glass lens. It’s distorted, blurry, and one-dimensional.” (Note: I’m assuming that this verse was translated from the Chinese dialogue and not transcribed from an English Bible translation, because this is, at the very least, not a popular translation of the verse that I’m familiar with. Ironically, it’s more popular to translate “glass” here as “mirror” so there goes this whole section LMAO.)

Because of the way it’s presented, I think that this image of distorted glass represents not how MC actually perceives Lucien but, rather, how Lucien believes he perceives her. Obviously, this is also foreshadowing the betrayal so, in a way, he’s correct in asserting that she is not seeing all of him. But, on the whole, this distorted glass imagery is delivered in a way that implies the distortion more as an insecurity on Lucien’s part rather than the reality of MC’s vision.

Rainbows

Keeping with Lucien’s themes of paradox and duplicity, one of his main motifs is the appearance of rainbows, despite the fact that he is colorblind. This is, again, representative of MC’s “light” being transformative to Lucien because the rainbows appear when they are together. I think that, rather than being a symbol for Lucien alone, rainbows represent Lucien’s relationship with MC. It’s a sort of combination of MC’s light imagery and Lucien’s refraction/distortion imagery. In the right circumstances, they can create something beautiful together.

It’s also implied throughout the story that Lucien is able to see colors when he’s around MC, so he is truly only able to appreciate the beauty of rainbows when he is with her. (Note: It’s unclear how this works but I think that it’s a side-effect of his Evol mimicking hers. There’s a footage mission where it seems like Lucien has to ask MC to look at something before he can tell the color of it so I think that he is somehow able to see the world through her perspective, possibly by using her Evol to have real-time visions. Does this make sense? Who knows, but I refuse to accept it just as soulmate magic!!!!)

If you haven’t, I highly recommend reading Lucien’s “Rainbow Luck” R&S. (Note: A recording is available here!) In this story, told from the perspective of Lucien’s pen, Iridescent, MC and Lucien see a rainbow together and it’s implied that this is Lucien’s first time being able to see a rainbow because MC is there. (Note: Iridescent as a name itself is an instance of Lucien’s rainbow motif.)

(Note: Lucien's Moments also features a rainbow paperweight at Bond Level 40.)

TLDR: Imagery and symbolism are used in MLQC to imply things about the characters and their relationships with MC. In particular, with Lucien, recurring imagery is used to represent his internal conflict and his desire for love and understanding from MC. The symbolism of light and its reflection/refraction is used to great effect throughout Lucien’s story, implying a complex web of internal struggles.

[nattyontherun]

Hey! I have a question, hope you don't mind. In Hearthfire Ino and Sakura say that Kakashi can be petty... is he really, though? What has Kakashi done that they consider petty?

fun question! and one i've been waiting on someone (other than @emberswrites lmao luv u bb) to ask!

so HF plays a lot with perception - as in, how characters view the situation at hand (Shisui coming back to life), themselves in relation to the situation (this answers why I chose "revolving closer - to collision" as the series name, yes) and each other.

to ino, sakura (though hardly perfect) is sorta the victim here? imagine it from her perspective: long time bestie, potential love of her life, shags up with the love of her life, they have a few blissful years of marriage (because why would sakura reveal that she's having problems with sasuke because of his mental health??) and then they break up ("mutually") only for said love of sakura's life to immediately move in with kakashi? the fact that sasuke gets SOME side-eyes and maybe a few whispers is literally amazing??? that's how you know ppl are scared of him??? because trust, if he were some commoner chuunin he'd get dragged to FILTH for this.

and so that's ino's perspective. she's already predisposed to thinking less kindly about sasuke and kakashi - kakashi in particular because, considering the beach and kakashi's age and literal job as hokage - it's easy to point at him and go "hey, this is the mfker who caused all this" so when kakashi lashes out in little ways: giving sakura the cold shoulder, some extra work maybe, or distancing himself or sasuke physically from her sometimes, that all just comes off as petty as fuck!

as for sakura - i like to think that HF sakura at least understands exactly why their relationship broke apart. it's this weird juxtaposition of knowing it wouldn't have worked out whether or not KKSS became a thing, yet hating specifically that KKSS became a thing because kakashi was sasuke's shoulder to cry on, so to speak. so she's in a position where, when ino points out something kakashi did as "petty", she doesn't /want/ to disagree, but she can't really /agree/ either, so she just lets ino do all the talking for her and lets the truth sit between them like still water.

so that leads us to that final scene between sakura and ino in HF, where ino asks about kakashi's pettiness and all sakura can do is *proverbial shrug*

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i do wanna say though that, especially early on in the SSSK "separation", i do think kakashi has a strong need to be very very petty and that he indulges that need. it's small things ofc. like i said: cold shoulder, extra work, avoidance. without context, it goes from petty to downright mean, tbh... with context, from sakura's perspective at least, it's kakashi lashing out in a way that least disrupts their lifes work while making it abundantly clear how upset he is at her. so all the rumors start and die this way, early on, without context.

ino does learn bits and pieces about sasuke's illness over the years... but smth smth first perceptions, smth smth kakashi and sakura aren't really/friends/ anymore in that point in time. like i said FUN stuff!!