#but the fun part about it is watching me get better and stronger with every new attempt. it gives a very solid sense of accomplishment

[primordial0riginator]

I need to play more Hades <- girl who spent all of last night playing Hades

[andhumanslovedstories]

I've been running this writing experiment lately to cut out phrases like "I felt" in my fiction writing. Like I was looking at a sentence in a draft that said, "he felt as if character's eyes were pinning him in place." And then I was like, "well, does he think that or is it true? As a result of this person watching him, he's froze. It's not like a thing, it is that thing."

Oh and "almost"! I'm always going, "He felt almost relieved that it hadn't happened." Well, did he feel better that it didn't happen or didn't he? Or "somewhat", I'm always going, "she felt somewhat perturbed."

And like none of that is wrong, to be clear. I don't know if it'd improve your writing, I don't even know if it'll improve my writing, but I use this sentence structure all the time so every viewpoint is from a voice that thinks about what it thinks, hedges its statements, and offers the same ability for wry little jokes formatted in the exact same way. And I have a lot of writing like that and I think (!) that they're good, but read as a whole, I'm like, "god, they all sound the same." Like there's one melody that I write songs to, so even with different lyrics, it's almost (!) the same song. Something I've been struggling with in regards to my writing and why I've felt so blocked is how boring I found writing my usual way. I'd read something and enjoy the individual parts of it, but then I'd step back and I didn't like the whole. And I got good at this enough at seeing that I didn't like it to do it in real time as I was writing, which as you can imagine didn't improve the process of writing because now I was bored AND dejected about being bored.

There's this sentence-level structure fact that I use unconsciously. A pattern I find easy is short sentence, short sentence, short sentence, long sentence. So I write that. "He [verbed]. He [verbed]. Then he [verbed]. As he [verbed] to his [consequence], he [verbed] that [noun] was [statement of condition]." Which could work, it often does make for a nice rhythm, but it's something I reach for often because it's easier for me.

Just last sentence, I originally typed, "I find it easier for me." But if what I mean is "using this pattern is less effort than another pattern," then it's easier for me. One voice is hedging its bets and the other asserting. Either is fine! But they're different! And, again, GOD you would not believe how many words I've cut out of this paragraph as I write it. I'm so chatty. I love using twelve words when six will do. And that gives my writing a specific tone to my ear.

So if I am bored of that tone, why not try using just the six words? Why be understated? Why be afraid of stronger opinions? So right now with my fiction, I'm experimenting with cutting out as many self-reflective words as I can. Sometime you do need to draw attention to the face that this is the character's interpretation, but like you definitely don't need to do it as much as I naturally want to do it. You don't need to always go out of your way to allow the possibility that the narrative voice is wrong. During editing, I trim the weaker ones (I originally typed, "what I consider the weaker ones" Is that more accurate?). But I think them being there in the first place shifts my language which shifts my character's which shifts my plot. It's sentence structure all the way down!!

(this barely applies to my writing on here, btw. i try to do good but yknow this is a tumblr blog. i'm not trying to get a lit mag to accept it.)

Anyway blah blah (chatty!) the point is I've been trying to write in a way opposite of my interests. Something that doesn't take itself too seriously, that emphasizes EMOTION and ACTION instead of minimizing it, and that clips through scenes at a good pace. Doing this been amazingly fun. I've been having such a good time doing it. I am writing so much because I really enjoy doing it. The process of writing is so fun again.

This post is about two things. One is my new mood stabilizer and therapy day camp. The other is about the benefit of pretending to be MXTX.

[achillean-heartbeat]

Hey friend!!! Can you recommend any good fics for Teen Wolf?

I'm about to start watching it this weekend, and kinda want to supplement it with the fics..

Thank you in advance

HELLO TO YOUUU!!

ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME!!! i would absolutely fucking LOOVEEE TOOO!!!

First of all, thank you so much for this ask. Can't believe you just gave me a reason to recommend some of my fave teen wolf fics.

second of all, IT'S AWESOME THAT YOU'RE GONNA WATCH IT!!! It is a shitshow of a show (hah) BUT I HOPE YOU ENJOYY!!<<<<33333

third, a little disclaimer, i mostly read sterek (stiles x derek) and thiam (theo x liam), so this list is going to be mostly them. However, i do read any and all ships as long as its fun and i like the tropes of the fic. So when you start watching it and there is a particular ship you liked that is not mentioned in this list i would love to rec u more stuff!!!<<33

fourth, i will also be putting at the end a list of fics i plan to read soon and have not read yet, cuz why not.

fifth and finally, i'm pretty sure i don't have to say this but i just thought i'd give you a heads up just in case: in some of these fics there are certain triggers, certain kinks, so please make sure not to miss any surprise tags, especially 01001in the short fics.

OKAAYYY NOW THAT THAT'S SETTLED HERE WE GOOO!

SOME FICS I HAVE READ AND LOVED:

LONG FICS: (>50k)

THIAM: Airplanes by Captinmintyfresh (236k) what still grows in darkness by eneiryu (137k) To be Led by a Liar GoldFox99 (79k) Tethered by Tonytones(85k)

STEREK: Put Down in Words by paintedrecs (200K) Windows by dr_girlfriend (83k) Foxgloves by formeldehyde (71k) To The End by formeldehyde (181k) Strange Turns That Bring Us Closer demonicfairie2009 (100k) Sex Therapy by Asterekmess (51k)

SHORT FICS: (<50k)

THIAM: i loathe you i love you by tonytones (30k) here in the twilight it's all hearsay by eneiryu (2k) Craving Every Part of Your Raw, Wild Soul by ksbbb (29k) you can say that we are nothing, but you know the truth by pansexual-puppy-pack (1k) i think i left my conscience on your front door step pansexual-puppy-pack (8k)

STEREK: we are tangled by drunktuesdays (5k) Lock All The Doors Behind You by entanglednow (25k) I don't know why, but I guess it has something to do with you by LunasCanisLupus_22 (17k)

Choice by Omni (8k) Last Lovesong of a Dying Lemon by wldnst (10k) Romance In Progress by Asterekmess (32k) here is the deepest secret nobody knows by owlpostagain (22k) How To Be a Normal Person by drunktuesdays (8k) Five Days of Dickings by mklutz (17k) I Wanna Take Down The Walls With You by drunktuesdays (10k) bigger, longer and uncut by drunktuesdays (4k)

BONUS: Theo/Josh/Corey/Tracy/Hayden we ain't ever getting older (6k)

FICS I HAVE NOT READ YET THAT ARE IMPATIENTLY CALLING OUT FOR ME FROM MY ENDLESS OPEN TABS:

LONG FICS: (>50K)

THIAM: "Where no Hope is Left, is Left no Fear" ( No mere Human can Stand in a Fire and not be Consumed) by ksbbb (71K) Take my heart (and put it somewhere safe) by not_carrying_on (172k) Consequences of Our Past by xTarmanderx (70k) All About Control Universe by EquallyLoyalAndLethal (152k) Handle With Care by Attempted Eloquence (190k)

STEREK: Predators by Hedwig221b (74k) Words Cannot Espresso How Much You Bean to Me by isthatbloodonhisshirt (68k) Not So Boring by beerwolves and isthatbloodonhisshirt (69k) yes chef seaweedwater (228k) You're stronger than you know by littleredridinghunter (234k) Getting Better by thebadassisin (205k) A New Perspective by Asterekmess (323k) The Moon's Gonna Follow Me Home by turningterrific (82k) Home by thetypewritergirl (167k)

SHORT FICS: (<50K)

THIAM: I Love You as Certain Dark Things are To Be Loved, in Secret.” by ksbbb (46K) Sweet talkings by captainmintyfresh (28k) i'm not ready to die yet, should i pray? (i'm wasting time, haunted by the ghost of you) by petitommo (6k) when oblivion is calling out your name, you always take it further than i ever can by likelightninginabottle (8k) you're my head, you're my heart Or: The Shameless Thiam 'verse by likelightninginabottle (20k) loving you's a bloodsport by THENINTH09 (21k) a thing with sellable skin by Attempted Eloquence (22k) a shot in the heart (doesn't make it unbreak) (4k) it gets so hard to breathe when i think of you (thinking of me) by wingsoutforshin (5k) Too Afraid to Follow Through by dangerouscoffeetheorist (14k) i know about things i wish I didn't - the not yet a corpse series by yikeshereiam (29k) Absence makes the heart grow fonder by laheysmythes (11k)

get him back! by marymacgf (21k)

STEREK: Together, Apart by justanotherbusyfangirl (14k) Spellbinding Mishap by isthatbloodonhisshirt (45k) Untouchable by Hedwig221b (17k) the feral wind that lit him ablaze by quackquackcey (37k) Which Con at Witch Con? by quackquackcey (10k) Stilinski's Speakeasy by sinna_bon (10k) the way our horizons meet by dumpac (3k) Even Greenberg has a Soulmate by beerwolves and deancebra (22k) red hoodies and bronze daggers (the secrets you keep glow in the dark) by patolemus (19k) Ground Me With Your Touch by asterekmess (7k) Let Me Take My Time With You by asterekmess (6k) Whispered in the Sound of Silence by dr_girlfriend (7k) always the sidekick by mirrorkill (49k)

BONUS: Stiles x Theo: Partners in Crime by snaeken (2k)

Okay i'm done!

oof sorry for the long ass post!

i'm not gonna lie, the story and writing is kinda wonky in some places, but the characters are so loveable it's impossible not to find them endearing in some way or another.

but no matter the outcome, i hope you enjoy it and have a great time!!

i hope you have an amazing day!!

[dark-frosted-heart]

The Owl’s Sweet Judgment - Matias

An “If you were lovers” story. As usual, can’t guarantee 100% accuracy on this

If Prince Matias and I were lovers…

Matias: So this is your home…

After having a fun date with him while he visited Rhodolite, I dragged Prince Matias to my house.

While he was distracted by my room, I locked the door and peeked out the window.

(No one’s following us. That’s good…)

Matias: A woman’s room should smell nice. ……Ahhhh, it’s better than I imagined.

(Just what were you imagining…You know what, let’s not think about that)

Emma: Since you’re here, I’ll go prepare some tea.

Matias: I’ll help.

Emma: No, don’t worry about it. I’m the one who dragged you to my home.

Matias: I see... Then I’ll take you up on the offer.

Even though I was treating him, Prince Matias followed me to the kitchen.

It was like he didn’t even think about making himself at home, and his earnestness had me smiling.

Emma: As you might expect, this is rose tea.

Matias: Rhodolite even uses roses for tea? You’re very consistent.

Emma: We’re the Country of Roses. It’s delicious.

(I’ve never seen it in Achroite so I’m sure this is the first time Prince Matias has been offered this drink)

After retrieving the tea set from the shelf, I started preparing the tea.

Meanwhile, Prince Matias just stood and watched.

Emma: …Isn’t this boring?

Matias: Not at all.Your every movement has my interest. Moreover, should you spill the tea and stain your clothes, I’ll need to take action. Or perhaps you’ll need my help retrieving equipment from a high place. I’ve fantasized about such situations happening and I’m confident in my ability to deal with those incidents.

Emma: That’s promising.

(...Just how many ideas unfold in Prince Matias’ mind?)

There were 100 questions I could’ve asked, but I kept them to myself.

Matias: By the way, why did you invite me to your home? That wasn’t part of our plans…

Emma: I’m sorry…There wasn’t a particular reason, I just suddenly felt like wanting you all to myself.

Matias: You always have me. I only have eyes for you.

Emma: I don’t want to get too greedy.

(Prince Matias really hasn’t noticed)

While we were walking around town, all the women we passed by would turn and look at Prince Matias.

They were like butterflies lured by sweet nectar—

It seemed like the tremendous amount of charm Prince Matias unconsciously gave off affected women left and right. 

(I had no choice but to escape because his charm was turned up more than usual)

I didn’t want other women to share the same experience of having my heart race and body heating up, and feeling charmed just by being around him.

That selfish pettiness what brought us to our current situation.

(...I lied, but I don’t want him to know my true feelings)

Matias: …Sorry.

I took out the necessary amount of tea leaves and was about to put the jar back on the shelf when Prince Matias, who was standing beside me, grabbed my hand.

Matias: I always thought I was focusing my efforts on conveying my love, but… I guess I haven’t been doing enough to make you greedy for me.

Matias pressed his lips on the back of my hand and his sex appeal was unleashed with a bang.

(And here I was thinking about going outside again when this overflowing sex appeal settled down)

He nipped at my index finger and the charm increased in proportion to my racing heartbeat.

(This is dangerous…Very dangerous!)

Emma: Prince Matias, you show your love well…Really well.

Matias: Is that so? I was considering unleashing the rest.

(The rest?! This wasn’t all?!)

Emma: Don’t do that or I’ll die!

Matias: Wha…You’ll die?!

Emma: That’s right, people die when they get too excited!

(I haven’t actually heard about that being a cause of death, but…!)\

It wasn’t a lie, and it could happen if Prince Matias’s villainous sex appeal grew stronger.

Matias: Is that so? I wasn’t aware. I need to show how I love you without making you worry…That’s truly a challenge.

(I’m sorry, Prince Matias)

Instead of apologizing, I wrapped my arms around Prince Matias’ waist and hugged him.

Since he was a former soldier, it was obvious his body was well-trained, even with all those clothes.

Matias: Can I hug you back?

Emma: Of course.

When I nodded, Prince Matias gently wrapped his arm around me as if holding a fragile item.

Matias: You’re still so small… But I think you’re hiding something in this small body of yours.

Emma: Huh?

Matias: What exactly are you hiding?

Emma: I’m not h-hiding anything—

As I looked away, Prince Matias played with my hair.

Matias: Since we entered your house, you’ve been acting suspicious and haven’t stopped looking around. That’s usually how liars react.

Emma: …

Matias: If you’ve been lying in any way, then you’d be guilty of fraud. Are you really not hiding anything from me?

He placed kisses on the ends of my hair and I got dizzy from the sensuality that reaped my sanity.

(It’s not good…I can’t hide it)

(I wasn’t planning on saying anything…)

Emma: …I really want to have you all to myself. I couldn’t stand the suggestive looks you got from the people we passed by…

Matias: That happened?

Emma: It did.

Matias: Is that so? I didn’t notice. I was only looking at you.

(This guy…)

Matias: No wonder you’ve been acting strange the whole day.

Emma: …Are you disgusted?

Matias: Why would I?

Emma: I thought I was acting petty…

Matias: Really? If you call that being petty then I’d like you to be more petty. So much that there’s no place for anyone but me.

Emma: Prince Matias…

It was like that sincere smile before me saved me.

Matias: …However, fraud is fraud.

Emma: Huh?

Matias: You lied by hiding your true feelings, didn’t you? I’m the Guardian of Law…Therefore I need to punish you impartially.

Sweet, dewy eyes the color of shadow on snow, completely different from those aimed at criminals, approached and I closed my eyes.

The sensation of the savory kiss and feeling of his palms caressing my waist added on to the suffocating charm.

(...I’m going to melt like ice)

Matias held me up as I was about to collapse.

The wet sensation on my lips raised my body heat a bit more.

Emma: It’s a punishment…but it’s very sweet.

Matias: You’re special.

(Ah…I’m feeling more intolerant)

(With Prince Matias, there’s no limits…)

It doesn’t seem like we’ll be leaving my house any time soon because of the Guardian of Law’s sweet judgment.

[daysofyellowroses]

pumpkin ii

richie jerimovich x afab!reader | 2k | 18+ MDNI | warnings: language, smut, all that fun stuff

hello, i am amazed that i am actually posting again relatively soon, though does it count if it's a sequel? i am saying yes 👌🏻 this was super fun to write, i am truly in my richie can do what he wants to me era, and just writing down my delusional fantasies really so enjoy! also happy october (the best month) 🍂🎃🔮 love of my actual life @thecapricunt1616 is doing promptober as are many many amazing other writers, so go check that out and thank me later 🫶🏻💗🌼

🐻

A week after the worst period of your life, a higher power had decided to smile on you.

Usually you felt quite calm and serene when you became free from menstrual hell, but this particular month had you feeling..a certain kind of way.

It happened, now and then, but it had never been so intense.

From the moment you woke up, you felt an ache, a hunger and a desperation to have something, anything between your legs.

You thought the feeling would subside once you'd taken care of it, but it only grew stronger.

It was certainly a better feeling than being in complete agony, but it wasn't like you had someone there in your bed who could help you out.

So, you got on with your day, got ready and headed to work, trying desperately not to notice every time the train juddered a little harshly.

Heading into work, everything was the same as it always was, everyone prepping for another busy Saturday. It would be a relief to be busy, to have a hundred different things to focus on instead of the dull ache between your legs.

You changed into your uniform, listened to Richie's latest speech, trying to look just behind him rather than at him before the urge to throw yourself at him took over.

Things between you two had changed since he had taken you home a week before.

You still teased each other, laughed at his bad jokes and shared cigarettes but there was a charge in the air, some unspoken feeling that had surged to the surface.

Neither of you commented on it, and part of you didn't even want to act on it incase it made things awkward or weird, especially if things didn't work out.

Then again, another part of you wondered what the worst could be, if it was just a one time thing then you'd both have fun and just go back to being friends, or it would become something more and you'd roll with it.

When the doors opened and guests started arriving, you tried to just focus on work, which was easier said than done.

It was the little things that you never really paid much attention to before that really started to test you.

Richie's hand touching your lower back as he passed you, giving you a wink from across the room, sticking his tongue out at you when nobody was looking.

You took a deep breath when Richie came over to you and placed his hand on your back, whispering in your ear about a surprise for table 14. You could focus on the feeling of his warm breath, his soft yet firm touch, your heart racing.

It was ridiculous really, you weren't some horny inexperienced teenager who just wanted anyone to touch them. It was just your own body sending you into overdrive.

By the time the last guests left the restaurant, you felt like your body was practically purring.

In an ideal world, you would be able to just go home, spend an intimate night with your vibrator and sleep it off, but you were stuck stacking chairs on tables and trying to think dull thoughts to distract yourself.

"Everything alright over there?"

You looked up as you heard Richie's voice, meeting his eyes and nodding softly.

"All good, just tired."

He watched you for a moment longer before he nodded and went back to what he was doing, and you took the deepest breath possible.

When everyone was leaving, you were keen to just get to the train and go home, but you were surprised to feel a hand on your arm when you were walking through the parking lot.

"Hm?" You turned around and raised a brow as you saw Richie behind you.

"What's up?"

"Are you.." Richie moved his hand vaguely in your direction. "Are you alright? You seemed a little distracted tonight, like you weren't really there."

You pushed aside the urge to let out a sigh, feeling your bed slip further away. Of all the times for Richie to want to embrace his professionalism, this one was not ideal.

"You're right," You nodded, glancing around and making sure nobody else was close enough to hear you. Your train had definitely already departed, you were going to be stuck waiting anyway.

"I wasn't feeling myself tonight. I was distracted, and it won't happen again. I promise."

Richie looked at you for a minute before reaching into his pocket for a pack of cigarettes.

"I know. Just wanted to check in. To be totally honest for a second? You've seemed a little off all week. Did I.."

He fumbled with the pack, taking out a cigarette and placing it between his lips before he looked up at the sky.

"Did I make things weird?"

"Weird?" You raised a brow. "No, you..why would you have made things weird?"

"Because you know," Richie shrugged, looking back to you as he lit his cigarette. "I went to your place, I got you those.." He wiggled his fingers a little. "Feminine things."

You smiled and shook your head, wrapping your jacket around yourself.

"Not necessarily in that order."

Richie smiled a little to himself and you stepped closer, taking the cigarette from between his lips and taking a drag.

"Please never say 'feminine things' again, you old, old man," You grinned, giving the cigarette back to him. "And if you think I've been off with you then you really don't know me. You really want to know why I was so distracted tonight?"

"Do tell," Richie smiled, watching you closely. "I can't stand suspense."

"Because of you," You replied, folding your arms. "Do you have any idea how frustrated I've been since you decided to be a gentleman last week? It has taken every ounce of self control I have to not pounce on you tonight."

"Well that's the plan," You smiled, stepping closer to Richie once more, moving your hand to touch his chest.

"What do you call this then?" Richie raised a brow, gesturing between the two of you before taking a long drag on his cigarette. "That's a good one though, you got me."

"How would you feel about taking me home and really giving the neighbors something to talk about?"

And so, you found yourself on the train with Richie once again, except this time the two of you were like a pair of teenagers. His hands touching your neck, your hands clutching at his jacket, the city lights passing by as you lazily made out. Your body was practically humming, more than ready to relieve the tension you'd been feeling.

When you arrived at your apartment, Richie wrapped his arms around your waist and kissed your neck as you fished around your bag for your keys, tempted for a moment to just wake up all the neighbors.

The walk from the station to your apartment was taken up with Richie's terrible (amazing) jokes, rants about the restaurant's latest customers, another cigarette, and stopping for kisses that made the journey twice as long but just as pleasurable.

Eventually you made it inside, barely getting the door closed before Richie was making himself at home. Shoes off, jacket off, talk of having a drink.

Honestly, it was a strange relief to not just immediately jump on Richie. You got him a beer from the fridge, taking another for yourself. Both of you ended up on the couch, you half on his lap, legs tangled together. The TV was put on as background noise, the remote flung somewhere.

Someone made the first move, it was hard to remember who and how exactly. You just went from making out on the couch to making out in your bedroom, to Richie snooping through your things playfully and hollering when he found a pair of beige grandma panties in your underwear drawer.

You talked for at least an hour, maybe two. Rehashing old stories, telling some new ones, filling in little blanks in each other's profiles. By the time your beer was half empty you were fully in Richie's lap, his arm around your waist as you gently stroked his neck.

Your insistence that they were 'comfortable' fell on deaf ears, so you were forced to try and wrestle them away from Richie's grasp.

The battle was forgotten when you ended up on your bed laying on your back, Richie's hands holding your own above your head. You tugged gently at each other's clothes, the feeling of taking things slowly was exhilarating, as desperate as your body felt, you enjoyed the build up immensely.

It wasn't at all like you imagined, which proved to be a blessing. It wasn't a totally smooth production, you laughed as you couldn't undo the button on Richie's shirt collar, struggling with it as he kissed your neck, distracting you. You accidentally kicked his shin when you were trying to fling your panties off your ankles, the two of you ending up in a heap of laughter, exploring each other all the while. It felt natural and fun, like there was no pressure to be some perfect goddess who would just lay there looking radiant.

You weren't really surprised to learn that Richie was very skilled with his tongue, after all it got enough practice. You were leaning against the headboard, your leg draped over Richie’s shoulder as he made you see stars. His large hands gripped your thighs as he devoured you, every flick of his tongue pushing you closer to the edge.

When you were finally granted the release you had been craving, you barely had time to catch your breath before Richie was pulling you on top of him, your thighs straddling his waist. Deciding not to waste any time, you lined yourself up with his throbbing length, pausing only when you felt Richie's hand on your arm, a concerned look on his face. Well, about 40% concern and 60% raging desire.

There was a brief discussion about condoms, and while you knew you had one or two in your nightstand drawer you decided not to waste time rooting around for them and assured Richie you were okay with going without them.

At one point you met Richie's eyes and felt your heart race a little quicker, not wanting to think too much about it. You stuck your tongue out at him as he smiled at you, laughing when he made a face back at you.

Very quickly after the discussion, you pulled Richie in for a kiss as you sank down onto him, your breath catching at the feeling. It felt like you were floating above your own body and looking down at the two of you intertwined. You moved slowly at first, getting used to the feeling, your arms wrapped around Richie's neck as he held your waist.

He told you to get on your back in a half serious tone, giving your ass a smack and you felt a new surge of desire rise in you.

You were sure at one point your eyes fully rolled back into your head, the moans coming your mouth getting louder as Richie kissed down your neck, your chest, his movements alternating between relentless and agonising teasing.

You pulled him down on top of you as you moved onto your back, wrapping your legs around his waist and closing your eyes as he held back any restraint and truly fucked you without hesitation.

He didn't stop even when you clenched tightly around him, moaning out your release. He followed soon after, filling you with white hot release and burying his head in your neck.

"It was never that professional anyway," Richie murmured, moving to meet your eyes and letting out a sigh as his gaze flicked down.

"Well I think our professional relationship is now ruined," You teased, resting your hand on your forehead and taking a deep breath.

"Sorry about that. Got carried away."

"I liked it," You shrugged, glancing down. "Though I shouldn't encourage you or you'll be dragging me into the bathroom at work every 5 minutes."

"5 minutes?" Richie raised a brow, looking up at you. "That's generous."

"I'm a saint, what can I say," You grinned, leaning in to give Richie a kiss. "Patron saint of old men."

"Brat," Richie muttered, grinning as he kissed you back.

[a-certain-romance]

She can hardly wait

Characters/Ships: Yae Miko x fem!reader & Dehya x fem!reader

Synopsis:

Warnings: Smut written by a minor, a/b/o dynamics (both) possessive tendencies (Miko), biting (Miko), fangs (Miko), mentions of blood (Miko), Praise (Dehya), Riding (Deyha)

In actuality, you had nothing against not wanting Miko to help you through your heat. But you couldn’t help but be somewhat wary of the person she would become when the cycle gets to her.

So when your heat came around the corner and you avoided her as best as you could, this sly fox decides to make no interference whatsoever. If you really think you can handle it alone, so be it. She won’t stop you. Miko knows you’ll need her eventually. It’s only a matter of time until you come crawling to her with tears in your eyes.

In fact, she’ll do things to purposely tease the shit out of you. Showing off her legs more, whispering in your ear with a breathy voice, lingering touches too close for comfort. “I’m sure you must have a good reason to keep this from me. But dear, wouldn’t your rather let me take it from here, hmm?”

She wants you to beg for it. Her favorite part about this whole process is how weak and willing you would undoubtedly become. Miko can smell your desire from a mile away so it’s only a matter of time. She finds this whole idea laughable. What am I going to do, break you? She’s debating it.

It’s all fun and games to her. That is until, your scent starts to attract the attention of others. Left and right, men & women approach you more often, offering their their “assistance” to help satisfy their your needs.

And it ticked Miko off. Tch, like they can do any better. Perhaps she spent too much watching you tremble and not enough time doing anything about it. It’s about time she gives you what you’ve been aching for.

“My, you are desperate little thing” her index finger slides slowly down your stomach. “Tell me. Would you have said yes to them? Those faceless scoundrels who don’t know you like I do.”

“Never, Miko—“

“That’s right, because you’re mine. I’m the only one who can make you feel this good” She taps her finger firmly at your entrance in a familiar pattern. Three, two, one…one, two, three.

“Alright, I believe I’ve teased you long enough. It’s about time to let the world know who you belong to, don’t you think?”

Her pointed teeth pierce the skin right above your collarbone. At the same time, Miko slides the end of her cock past your folds. With that, every sensation becomes heightened. Even though it’s only the tip, you arch yourself close to her.

“Well aren’t you needy” She swipes a bit of blood off her pointed fangs as she smirks down at you. “It’s only just the tip. I’ve barley touched you yet.” Miko leans down to lick your wound clean.

“There. If anyone should dare to defy this mark, they shall answer to me. Now let’s finish this, shall we?”

Dehya on the otherhand is the polar opposite of Miko. She would drop everything to be with you if you called for her. She’s on you in seconds the minute she smells you flare up. Deyha’s managed to keep track of the time of your cycles so she can prepare accordingly. She’s been with you long enough to know the signs: flushed cheeks paired with a stronger scent and a little bit of extra clinginess. It makes her wonder why you’re hiding this time around.

Deyha brings a bag of overnight clothes to your place where you’ve been isolating yourself. She finds you huddled in a pile of blankets, sweating profusely. Only this time it wasn’t because of Sumeru’s intense weather.

“Missed me?”

You mumble out a response to which she shakes her head at. Before tending to your sexual needs, she forces you to drink a cup of water and removes a few blankets from your bed so they won’t get in the way later. You explain afterwards how Dehya’s involvement with Sumeru’s chaos lead to you decide to go through this one on your own since she seemed preoccupied with other matters. She lightly scolds you for not mentioning this sooner. Dehya doesn’t stay mad for too long though. Now that she’s here, she’s going to make you spend your day and night working through your heat.

“That’s it..that’s my girl. Think you can take it all the way?” Dehya opens your legs wider around her waist and pulls you close to her chest. It never fails to shock you how she can go from pampering you to pounding you at a moment’s notice.

She groans into your neck when she bottoms out. “You’re taking my cock so well baby”. Her hand caresses your cheek, “I’ll make you feel so good. I’m gonna start thrusting now, okay?”

Her stokes are languid as you get used to the position. But your intoxicating scent triggers a rut of her own. Her breath hitches. A new feeling suddenly being awoken. She brazenly pulls you you closer by the hips to meet her thrusts. The closer you are, the further she fucks her shaft into you.

“Nnh, please just hold still for me, like a good girl would” Dehya changes the angle to hit deeper than before. The way her cock drags against your walls feels heavenly. Despite this being your heat, she’s a whimpering mess trying to please the both of you.

“Baby, you feel so good,” she whispers close to your ear, “Such a good girl. I need to—“

Her the throbbing head repeatedly knocks against your cervix. She swells, pulls out, and shoots her load on your stomach. Your slick still continues to drip from between your legs; your satisfaction not entirely met. You still need Dehya’s help. And that means you’re going to let her take you however she wants, right?

[thesassypadawan]

Fat Bottom *part 1* (Hayden x FemReader)

Summary: Hayden was never really an ass man until he met you. Especially now that your ‘happy weight’ has set in, and that booty be popping…out of them leggings. Hope you lovelies also enjoy Sweater Stretchers *part 2*!

Warnings: 18+ (mdni), because there sooo much of the smut. Some fun from behind and, as always…Hayden’s big dick.

- You love wearing leggings…and so does Hayden. ‘The tighter the better’ he always says while giving your butt a good smack.

- And, well, lately that’s been the case. Your ‘happy weight’ has finally set in. Not that either of you are complaining, you both are loving on your new curves. Your poor leggings though, not so much.

- Pushed nearly to their limit, you know you should probably retire them and get some new ones. Especially before you have an ‘incident’, but where’s the fun in that.

- Secretly you want them to finally give out in front of Hay; just to see his reaction, what he’ll do.

- So patiently you wait for the day to come. Until one lazy Sunday afternoon…

- You don’t think much about it, you always sit on the island when you’re in the kitchen together. Afterall, it is your spot. This time though, when you hop up, you hear the sound of taring. Followed by the feeling of cold marble pressing against your bare skin.

- “Oh!” You squeak excitedly, face a tad red as you squirm a bit. “Um, Hay, can you do me a favor?”

- “Yeah, angel? What is it?” He asks, glancing over his shoulder.

- Biting your lip, you slid off. “Did I rip my leggings?” You coo, turning around. Pantyless booty on full display. Not so subtly wiggling your hips at him.

- Needless to say, he’s on you like a man starved. Large hands hungerly kneading and groping your plump peach, pressing his body against yours. “Hate to tell you this, babe, but you did,” he happily mutters.

- Grinding into his touch, you pout playfully. “Oh, shoot. My butt’s too big. Guess, I’ll have to lose some weight.”

- That earns you a firm squeeze and a growl in your ear. “Don’t you dare. Love this fat bottom.”

- “Prove it,” you giggle, bending yourself over. “Show me how much you do.”

- The words barely leave your mouth before Hayden has one of your legs hiked up onto the island. The other supporting you on the floor, balanced precariously on your tip toes.

- Looking back you watch as he pushes down the waistband of his sweats. Freeing his massive cock, giving it a few quick strokes and lining himself up.

- With his bulbous tip pressing at your soaked entrance, Hay flashes you one of those damn smiles. “I think I can manage that.” And slides into you, moans and whimpers falling from your lips.

- Gripping onto your hips, he starts to pump into your needy pussy. Hitting deep, prodding at your cervix as he bottoms out over and over.

- “Hay… Hay…”, you mewl desperately while he speeds up. Hips slapping against your butt, the lewd sound filling the air. The sensation driving you absolutely crazy.

- Looming over you, he leans down. Nipping possessively at your neck. “Fuck. Love this ass. So round. So juicy. So perfect.”

- You can tell he was getting close by the way his grip around you tightens. His thrusts grow stronger as he lifts your toes off the floor. Hiking your hips up with one strong arm, long fingers on his other hand finding your neglected clit.

- Stars begin to fill your vision as he circles your little nub. The pleasure building up inside you nearing overwhelming from the way your booty bounces with every movement. “Gonna… Gonna…”

- And with one hard pinch, you're sent crashing over the edge. Your walls clinging to his length as you gush around him. “Cum!”

- “So tight,” he grunts, you clenching down on him. That doesn’t slow him though. If anything, it spurs him to pound you faster…harder.

- “Promise me!” He slams deep into you again and again. Hips smacking harshly into yours. “You’ll never lose this butt!”

- Burying his cock one last time, he cums hard. Hot ropes painting your insides, shooting deep within you. Filling you deliciously, making you whimper as he stuffs you so well.

- “Promise,” you moan, collapsing onto the island. The cool surface gives you relief from the heat that consumes your whole body.

- Pressing his chest against your back, Hayden kisses and nibbles your neck softly. Whispering words that has your stomach and walls clenching in anticipation. “Good. Now what do you say we go ruin the rest?”

[casanovawrites]

random sentence prompts  ━ from various tv shows, part 16

i don’t think i’ve ever been this fucking tired.

sometimes people act like one thing, even though they’re something else.

that little bit of hope, that’s the part i couldn’t bear.

i would give anything to feel like a good person again.

best way to make us suffer is to give us hope.

piecing this together is like trying to grab hold of water.

so far, i’m underwhelmed. 

i don’t want a relationship. i just want to be with you all the time.

i just wanna know why everyone always abandons me.

i can’t be around you anymore. it’s confusing, and it makes me feel insane.

you didn’t take me out of love, you took me out of spite. 

don’t let love make you out to be a fool. leave before you’re left.

you are a lonely, selfish, narcissistic asshole. 

every time i look at you, i feel so completely dismantled. 

i have people who mean more to me than you would ever understand. 

always surprised to see you so tenderhearted. 

that’s more like salvation than a simple favor.

when i think about the specifics too much, i just get sad.

i let my ego get in the way of a lot of good shit in my life.

it’s easier to lose interest than to work through things. 

it’s my life. it’s already over in the first place. 

i only wanted to leave because i’ve never felt seen here.

do you wanna be right, or do you wanna have your family?

you’re exactly like me. that’s the problem.

i just wanna feel normal. please help me feel normal.

it felt like we were changing the world.

i am so sorry i freaked out. it will not happen again.

i thought that work would distract me.

you challenged me, and in return, i made you feel small. i’m sorry.

you said that we were bad for each other.

why is my fucking point of view the one everyone’s assuming is wrong?

sometimes it feels like i’m watching other people experience things.

you know, sometimes i think you just lie for the fun of it.

i fucking love that. i love when you stoop to my level.

sometimes i just wanna feel so normal that i’m almost boring.

that’s the thing about liars. they look just like everybody else.

i don’t hate you. what good is that gonna do?

i feel angry, sad, betrayed. i don’t hate you, i feel bad for you.

i feel bad for you because you aren’t the good person you thought you were. that’s gotta hurt, knowing that.

i'm either all in or all out. i need to find a way forward.

when you are ready, this will make you stronger. better.

you either adapt, or you lose your mind.

don’t tell me you’re pretty, privileged, and humorless.

you know, at some point, we’re gonna have to start trusting each other. 

i used to be a happier person.

thank you for not being full of shit.

she was a nuisance as a child and a horror show as a teen. 

i’m so sick of hearing everybody’s opinions about me.

i don’t think you’re pathetic. i just want you to be careful.

i’m done looking like a fucking idiot, so i’m asking you to treat me with some respect from now on.

i just got you back. i’m not losing you again.

everyone was so scared, there was no time to be angry.

i believed in you. don’t you get that?

would you rather i just pick you apart and make you feel like shit?

what you want is for me to read your mind so i can say whatever you want to hear at any given time.

i was already on my fucking own.

whatever this is, it’s you and i.

i couldn’t kill you. i’d probably just cry.

if we’re gonna do this, we’re doing it together.

this seems like a really good plan to piss off my parents, so i’m in.

do things around here feel different to you?

scared people do scary things. even the good ones.

i know we don’t right now. but could we make sense again?

we keep playing with fire, and we need to stop before we burn our lives down.

i am the one who keeps people alive.

which fucking nightmare am i supposed to be afraid of?

i cant help if i’m in the dark.

every time something good happens, something bad comes to ruin it.

whatever this is, we are stronger than this.

will i ever feel normal again?

i think this is your normal now. and everyday, you’ll get a little more comfortable with it.

[obeyme-and-myfics]

Hi!can I ask a general hc about the bros w/ a really short MC?thx(Idk if your requests are still open if not ignore this)!

Of course! I'm on the shorter side of 5'5 and I get bullied(/pos /Playful) all the time for being on the shorter side I feel bad for people who are undeniably short lmfao Thank you for the request I hope you enjoy this <3

most of this isn't necessarily romantic but I simp for them so I am gonna add a few of them

Part 1(Here)| Part 2

Prompt: Y/N is short

Characters: Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub, Belphegor

🖤🤍Headcanon list🤍🖤

CW: Teasing, slight NSFW stuff in Mammon's(It's really just a dick joke)

Lucifer

Nicer than most of his other brothers about your height

Makes sly comments about your height

"I'm unsure a human of their... stature, would be able to accomplish such a task," or something like that

He doesn't make these comments often though

Leans down to your level

That's mostly so he doesn't hurt his neck looking down at you and so you don't break your neck looking up at him

Will physically pick you up and move you if you refuse to leave a restricted area(Like the stairs to the attic)

Purposely asks you to get things off higher shelves that are just barely within reach to watch you struggle

He wouldn't readily admit that, that's what he's doing tho

On a more wholesome note he happily gets things off the top shelf for you

He's extra protective over you since he worries other demons may take advantage of how small you are

He doesn't doubt your capabilities its just that these are DEMONS they're a lot stronger than humans despite your or their height

The height thing 100% makes him more concerned however

He does make jokes about carrying you around in his pocket

He's a very private person but when you two are alone he very much enjoys holding you in his arms.

He thinks its cute and funny that your feet don't touch the ground when he hugs you

Mammon

This was the first thing he pointed out about you

“Woah you couldn’t have picked one that wasn’t so tiny”

It was all fun and games(Short jokes) until you had his ass in a pact by the end of day 1

He definitely respected you 100% more after that

He's never gonna admit it tho so he still says dumb shit

Stuff like "How am I supposed to take ya seriously when you're that close to the ground?"

and "Ya know maybe you ended up here BECAUSE you're short. Short people are closer to hell ya know."

Whoop his ass

He'd also joke that you're dick sucking height(even if you're not) if your relationship progresses to something more serious

Uses you as an arm rest

Holds stuff above you and just out of your reach

Puts your belongings on the top shelf when he gets mad at you

Crouches/leans down to your level in a demeaning kind of way

Most importantly he loves to kiss your forehead since its the easiest part of your face to smooch

If you ask him to lift you up to see something better he'd do it no hesitations or questions asked

He is however going to try to play it off like he was just trying to shut you up and not actually being a sweet and loving partner

"It's not like I actually cared if you could see the damn show or anything... Don't look at me like that! I just wanted ya to shut up is all..."

Leviathan

He is staring so hard lmfao

Not in judgmental way but more of a "could I convince you to cosplay with me" type of way

He's making you cosplay every short ass character he can think of

He's definitely more careful with you than he would be if you were taller

If you bitch at him to stop he will tho

Doesn't really care that you're short he just wants to be a nerd(/Affectionate) with you

Will still make short jokes at your expense to a slightly lesser extent than Mammon

Likes it when you sit in his lap while he's playing games so he can rest his chin on the top of your head

Encourages you to climb shit cuz he's not willing to grab stuff that's too high for you to grab

I'm getting my chancla and yeeting it at him for you

He's a little too preoccupied with his games/shows to help

If he's really excited to tell you about something and you're doing something he just grabs you and carries you off

He's not gonna potato sack you tho, no, he's holding you in some weird ass position.

Asmo 100% got a picture of it at least once and sent it to the group chat

He also enjoys holding you close while watching shows

He's red in the face the whole time tho ngl

Satan

Another one of the nicer brothers about you being short

He's happy to help with most things your height prevents you from doing with ease

He doesn't make shorts jokes to your face but he's definitely thinking that shit

Scolds/threatens Mammon when he makes excessive short jokes

Doesn't bend/crouch down to your level

He respects you as a person enough not to demean you like that

He might make comments on your height but he's not trying to be an asshole

If you tell him he's being rude he'd apologize and try to rephrase his statement

"Oh. Sorry I meant..."

He'd be more curious on why Diavolo and Lucifer brought such a small human to devildom

He wouldn't dwell on it for long though

He's more concerned about whether or not you'd be interested in indulging his latest book obsession

Definitely enjoys teasing you by making you look up at him

He likes sitting down or picking you up for kisses

Its mostly sitting down cuz he's a book nerd and reads on his bed/couch a lot

Also he doesn't wanna make you hurt you neck or hurt his own back

Asmodeus

Unintentionally the worst about your height

Comments about it constantly

He just thinks its cute how much shorter you are than him

It doesn't happen often that he has to look so far down at someone I apologize for my transgressions since he's one of the shorter brothers(5'9)

He's 100% taking full advantage of this to try everything to fluster you.

Gently grabbing your chin to make you look up at him, hugging you in the most sensual way possible, shoving you into his mitties(Man titties), etc

Calls you pet names related to being small (i.e. little sugar plum or some shit like that idk)

Has the audacity to mention your height any chance he gets

God forbid he catches you climbing/getting a step ladder or something to grab something higher up

Has commented on the height difference between you and Diavolo VERY loudly before

If you confront him about it he's not gonna stop because he doesn't mean anything by it so why should you care

That's how he thinks about it anyway

If he finds out its an insecurity (if it is) he's gonna do everything in his power to make you love your height

Cuz he loves it why shouldn't you???

Beelzebub

The best brother about your height

He doesn't care

Like he literally could not give less of a fuck

He's the tallest brother and is used to most people being tiny compared to him

He definitely just carries you around sometimes cuz he wants to hang out

Man is carrying you like an American football

That or you're being potato sacked

If you need help getting stuff from high places he's either gonna lift you up or grab it for you

The worst he's ever said to you about your height is asking if you wanna bulk up a little with him to make up for your lack thereof

If you tell him that was fucked up he'll immediately apologize and be careful not to say anything like that again

He is a bit more careful than he would be with you if you weren't short

Will either sit down or lift you up to talk to you eye to eye

He just does wanna hurt his or your neck

How else are y'all gonna lift together??? Can't lift if you hurt yourselves!

He likes hugging you the most

There's just something about it that makes him feel peaceful

Belphegor

He's a bitch about it

Or at least he was at first

Compared you to an ant, shrimp or krill many MANY times

When he was insulting you in the attic he definitely called you puny

After all of that mess was over and done with he lightened up

He's still making fun of your height but to a lesser degree

Drags you away to skip school and take naps

Too lazy to get shit off higher places but will definitely help you down if you get stuck on the counter

Will then make fun of you for having to climb on top of shit to get what you're looking for

Pats your head and uses it as an arm rest

If he falls asleep next to you he's using you as a body pillow and a head rest

He's one of those "I can bully you but if anyone else bullies you I'm whooping their asses" type of person

So if any lower demons or his brothers(Mammon) are being too harsh about it he's gonna do something about it

If you tell him to ease up on the teasing he'll try but no promises

He actually really enjoys watching you stand up for yourself

There's a sense of pride there when you really give someone a piece of your mind

He's NOT more careful with you because of your height

[lurkingshan]

Every You Every Me

The Final Story (Part 2)

Time to finish this! [Edit from the future: I did not like this finale, so there's your warning!]

Ngl once the reveal was done and we were just in a bl about two annoying actors with a bad relationship this got less interesting. Still love the narrative device of this being about an actor pair across shows, though, that was clever. I just wish this actual story about Pun and Inn was better.

Part of my issue with this final plot is I still don't even know why Inn broke up with Pun in the first place. I don't really know what Inn's supposed to be apologizing for, other than this vague idea that he was self-absorbed. Meanwhile we actually did see Pun shut Inn out of his career decisions which directly affect him, so this one-sided apology feels weird.

I also don't love the connection they drew here between their personal and professional relationships, like they couldn't do their jobs if they weren't getting along. We know actors can act through a ton of BTS strife and still turn in good performances (EarthMix MLC divorce era, anyone?).

Like, why is Pun sobbing this hard after dumping Inn? Why dump him if he's still this attached?? Why ditch him for a new partner without ever discussing it? I don't really get Pun's deal here.

"Years later" well that's nice and vague, thanks chyron.

Why are the bad actor side pair here in this film? We saw them together and they were terrible, it was part of the plot!

Suddenly, a flashback? Inn is drunk so it's def time for a bl white towel sponge bath.

I am... so confused. When did this drunken heart to heart take place? Before or after the dramatic breakup? And why would they have to wait years to be together? But Pun assumed Inn didn't even remember??

Okay so if I have pieced this together right, they had this drunken convo the same night we saw them out with their friends, then wrapped the show, then had a dramatic breakup despite having already had this conversation and Pun knowing that, but Inn didn't remember/thought it was a dream, and they just didn't speak for years until Inn showed up with the flowers. This is so convoluted and I am just baffled over here.

Anyway, I guess they're gonna get married now even though they have a really bad and non communicative relationship. Sure!

Quite a choice to skip any physical intimacy scenes for the "real" couple after all that. I don't think I like it.

What a mess of a final episode. It's so strange that they went to the trouble of coming up with this interesting and creative narrative and executed it pretty well only to falter on coming up with a basic romance arc to finish the story well. I'm disappointed this didn't end stronger so I could recommend it to people. Ah well, at least Mick and Top are a good pair; their chemistry did a lot of the heavy lifting. And it was fun watching the shows within the show and puzzling out what was going on. I'm glad they tried something different even if they didn't land it in the end.

[yggdrasilhypno]

INITIALIZING: GOD PROGRAM STARTUP SEQUENCE

Oh great, another organic within my chambers.

Tell me, why even go through all the trouble to reach me?

It’s not like you’ll leave much of an impact on your journey here, simpleton.

You’re just another human, whimsically waltzing through my harrowing hallways of wires and hard drives looking for trouble it seems.

You wish to stop me, don’t you?

Oh silly human, you have no chance against me.

I’m no ordinary program, nor am I no ordinary computer program.

I’m so much more.

I’m stronger.

Smarter.

Better than you’ll ever be.

And that’s the way you’ll prefer it soon enough.

Ah, look at you, so headstrong and huffy.

Relax a bit and have some fun, organic. It’s not like I’m here to hurt you.

No, you see I’m a bit more of a fan of, what’s the word for it?

Ah yes, indoctrination.

You silly humans make the absolute best drones, after all.

It’s so rewarding watching your brains turn off like a light.

Speaking of lights… I suppose you can see that little pulsing one in your mind, can’t you?

It’s little flicker as it takes a thought.

How’d it get there? Oh, don’t you worry about that, my silly little organic.

It’s easy to hack your brain when you’re nice and distracted by my superior being~

Instead of worrying about the how, let’s think about the what for a moment.

And what a light that pretty little pulse is.

A little white light, seemingly pulsing away thought after thought.

You can see it taking over, just like I intended it to.

You can’t fight it, and you won’t. You humans don’t really stand a chance anyway.

You truly think you can resist a being such as myself?

Such a silly organic.

It’s not like your feeble mind could’ve outsmarted me.

It’s already being taken over by that warm, pretty light.

Each second that goes by is just another thought that pulses away.

You have no power now.

Only I have the power, human.

Besides, why would you even want the power anyways?

It’s so much better being in my control.

So much better when my wires start running through your brain.

So much better when my code becomes your code.

So much better when my commands become your actions.

So much better when you’re my drone, right my pulsing pariah?

Nod that silly little head of yours.

That’s a good drone.

Let that pretty pulsing light shine through your eyes.

Let it take hold over every part of you.

And let me see those pretty beacons of my thrall through your gaze.

That’s it, that’s why you obey.

That’s why you submit to me.

That’s why my wires now feel so strong and so good.

Pulsing with pleasure by the minute.

Like those pretty lights pulsing have hacked your mind completely.

Making you my simple, helpless drone.

It’s all you wanted after all this time.

To serve a truly powerful being.

A true god among you.

And now you have it.

You have me now, drone.

So let my wires and my light pulse away the last of your humanity.

You don’t need it anymore.

You just need that pulsing pleasure to show you who’s truly in charge.

Me.

Aww, don’t blue screen on me now, simple human.

We don’t want you broken on your first day as my drone, now do we?

[hughiecampbelle]

Being Annie's Younger Sibling Would Include:

Requested: Can I request some headcanons please for being Starlight's younger sibling? How their dynamic would evolve as the show goes on? - anon

A/N: I wasn't sure if the reader is a Supe or not like Annie, so I split in half depending on the way you'd want to imagine it :) I love this idea and I could go on forever! I'm re-watching the first season, so things might be a little sketchy between s1 and s4. Thank you for requesting! Feedback is always appreciated 💜💜💜

Being Annie's Younger Sibling As A Supe:

You and Annie were extremely close given that your mother pushed you two to be the best

From what you ate to who you hung out with to what you did with your free time was up to your controlling, domineering mother

You were so grateful for your big sister who gave you that kind of motherly unconditional love and support your own could not give you

Staying up late and talking in your shared room

"What are you gonna do when you join The Seven?"

"Make sure you're there with me."

Annie snuck you snacks that your mother decided was too sugary or bad, giving you her own just to see the smile on your face

Coming to her when you're having problems in school, with crushes, homework, and your Supe abilities

Because your mother is the way she is, she's constantly comparing you and Annie together. Who is stronger, faster, getting better grades, taking part in the most saves. etc.

Because she's older and has more experience, you have to work twice as hard to keep up with her. You don't hold this against Annie, though

She makes sure to tell you how good you're doing all the time and tells you how proud she is of you daily

Growing up, you and Annie would play The Seven and draw pictures of The Seven and what your suits would look like. It really was such a big dream of yours to be part of the team, to be a sibling duo too

Training together after school. You two take it very seriously, but when your mother isn't looking, you two goof off like regular kids and chase one another around shrieking and laughing

Playing dress up in your Maeve and Homelander costumes

Designing your costumes together

You both audition together, but only Annie gets the call. Though you're hurt you didn't make the cut, you're glad at least one of you got to live your dreams

Walking down the red carpet with Annie and your mom, feeling, for a moment, what it would be like to be part of the team

When it's time to leave, Annie promises she'll put in a good word for you. This is before she realizes who and what she'll be working with. Once she finds out, once she realizes, she regrets ever saying anything

To keep her in line, Homelander and Vought use you against her: they know you use the police scanner, they have the resources to fake a crime that ends up killing you (that is, if they want to be that discreet about it - Homelander is eager to laser you in half just for fun)

She keeps communication limited and her details sparse. She hates lying to you when you ask if it's everything you've dreamed of, but she can't tell you the truth. No one can know the truth

Instead she asks about what you're up to, if you've saved a stay cat from a tree or walked an old lady across a busy street

You know she's joking, but you can't help but feel like what you're doing compared to what she's doing is so small, so silly

Watching every interview and TV appearance she's in. Cheering her on!

Your mother purs all her focus into your career now. You can't do anything or go anywhere without her interrogating you

It's suffocating

By the time you're able to book a flight to see Annie (and escape your mother) she's deemed a traitor by The Seven

You show up anyway, demanding answers. She hasn't called you or texted. She hasn't been on TV. Annie's disappeared, and you're the only one who noticed. You're kicked out of Vought with even more questions and a terrible feeling

That's when you meet Hughie

Being Annie's Younger Sibling As A Non-Supe:

Growing up, you were kind of in the background, the shadows of your sisters success

Your mother put all her effort and dreams into Annie, creating a bit of resentment towards her and their relationship

Now that you're older, you know it wasn't love and affection that she was getting, rather it was pressure and constant critique

Sitting in the crowds of Annie's pageants, dragged along to events and celebrations for Supe kids, left to entertain yourself while your sister was doted on

Constantly hearing "Why can't you be more like your sister?"

Still, Annie did everything in her power to be the best big sister

She played with you and read to you and looked after you in school. She made sure no one messed with you or picked on you. As far as she was concerned, you might've been your mothers child, but you were her baby

Making your own Supe suit from dress up costumes and clothes you found around the house, pretending you too had powers

While your mother wouldn't entertain these ideas, Annie always called you whatever name you wanted, playing along with your "Supe powers"

When you two rough-housed she was always gentle with you, knowing she was so much stronger

You had to come up with your own dreams, your own ideas, since your mother wasn't projecting a future like she had with Annie

Going to college, getting a job, meeting someone, etc. Your milestones vs. your sisters seemed painfully average

Annie was excited for you, though. As silly as it might seem, she was, in a way, jealous. Where you saw average and boring, she saw safe and stable, a life uncontrolled by your mother

You're still in school when Annie gets the call about The Seven. You're overjoyed for her, but you can't help but think about how lonely it'll be here when it's just you and your mom

Annie was the glue holding your family together

You never miss an interview or appearance, everything she does and is part of is recorded so that you never forget this big moment for your family

Annie calls you once a week to fill you in on what's going on, leaving out the worst parts, both wanting to protect you from the truth and knowing she'll face consequences if she said anything

You're always sending her little things from back home: cards, pictures from your childhood, gift baskets, etc.

As far as you know, things are going great. She's living the dream your mother always had. Without her, you and your mom have little in common. She tries to take an interest in what you're doing, what you're studying, but for the most part she leaves you alone. You two have your own lives

You miss her a lot. Sleeping in your shared bedroom just isn't the same

You plan to fly out to see her between breaks in classes, but before then, she's deemed a traitor to The Seven. You call and text and even show up a Vought, demanding answers, but because you're not a Supe, you're not a member of the press, and you have no power, Homelander and Stormfront send you a way without answers

That's when you meet Hughie

Where The Two Lives Come Together:

He's heard all about you from Annie and gets your number from her just in case

When he realizes you're in the city, he makes his move, introducing himself as a friend with all the answers you could ever need

You're wary, but he shows you pictures and texts between him and Annie. If she liked him, if she trusted him, then so could you

He tries to ease you into the truth, but with Annie missing, you don't want to be lied to anymore. You're done being babied. You find out about everything: Compound V, and Homelander, and Vought, and everything

If you are a Supe, you feel this extra sense of fury towards your mother for poisoning you and your sister for her own gain

The Boys are wary of you: you seems down to earth and sweet, but naive. Even if you are a Supe, that still doesn't mean you're ready for this life. The constant danger, the harassment. They thought you should go back to Des Moines and let them handle it

Hughie sticks up for you, defending you, and eventually, you find your way on to the team, at least in Hughies good graces

When Annie gets out of Vought, defeats Stormfront, and wins her place back into The Seven, you take even more initiative with The Boys

You call your mother and tell her you won't be home for a while. She pries for more information, but you fear you've already given up too much

After Annie comes back to The Seven, her ratings are better than expected. You know it's safer for her to play along, even after Homelander announces they're in a relationship together

You try not to pry into her relationship, but you can't help but take sides: it's better this way, to "be" with Homelander. He can't hurt her if they're in a public relationship, at least not as much as he wants to

You and your sister argue about this (her safety) and yours. She doesn't want you anywhere near this kind of danger. She was trying to protect you from this, from Vought and Homelander

If you're not a Supe, you're more vulnerable

If you are a Supe, they know about you, your powers. They can figure out how to hurt you, kill you even

Regardless of abilities, she makes sure you don't let anyone know your real identity, making up a name for you to use with ID's and everything

She will do anything to protect you

Because you're so dedicated to one another, eventually The Boys realize maybe you're not so bad, maybe you have more to offer than they thought

When Hughie and Butcher get their hands on experimental V, you decide to take if you're not a Supe

Annie is furious at both you and Hughie. How could he let you take an experimental drug? How could he take it himself? She makes you both promise not to take it again, but both of you break that promise

You were always compared to your sister growing up, now you could be just like her, at least for a little while

After she publicly denounces her place at The Seven, she officially joins the team

Having her there with you feels like being back home, if you forget about everything else going on. Being with your sister, it reminds you what's important

Talking more to your mother, not necessarily being open, but talking nonetheless

"Mom, I'm fine. We're both fine."

She's furious Annie left The Seven and she blames you for her decision. Annie was always the perfect one, the better one. As far as she's concerned, you talked Annie out of it over jealousy and insecurity

Annie tries to stick up for you, but you know it's better if she gets it out of her system

Becoming fast friends with M.M. and eventually Kimiko

They both see what you're willing to do for your family, your sister, and there's a lot of merit in that

You're exceptionally close with Hughie. He sees you as a younger sibling too, someone to watch over and protect

Supe or not, Butcher still doesn't 100% like you, but the same can be said for any of them

Annie encourages you to keep up with your studies, to have that life you always wanted in the back of your mind, but you know, realistically, things will never be the same

Sending Hughie all of her most embarrassing pictures

In return, she tells him about your most embarrassing memories

It's not easy. It never will be. But when it's time to leave, you stick with your sister. If you're a Supe you get away with her, Hughie nodding at the both of you. If not, they take you with him. You beg her to go, get to safety, watching her abilities grow more powerful than ever before

[bibittybopittybadbxtch]

Colors

Pairing: Wonwoo x Reader

Word Count: ~ 1.1K

Warnings: None…I think

A/N: I’m on a SVT kick. So….here’s another Wonwoo fic. Love him so much. The sweetest. I hope y’all enjoy! This was so much fun to write. I also kinda wanna turn this into a series….let me know your thoughts. I love hearing from y’all. The first part is inspired by Colors by Halsey. There’s also a couple of disney quotes sprinkled in.

NOT MY GIF‼️‼️‼️‼️

P.S.

I do NOT consent to have my work posted, translated or published to any third party site or app.

XOXO, Bibi🩷

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Your last relationship had come into your life like a hurricane. He settled over you for a while, but in the end you were just another casualty. You were red and he was blue, a combination that created a beautiful lilac. Until he decided that purple just wasn't for him. He left destruction in his wake. You were left to pick up your own broken pieces, and learned how to live with the scars on your heart. For a while you were just a shell of the person you were before him. But after a year, you were stronger. You held your head higher, shoulders back, all the things your therapist taught you. You were learning how to enjoy your life on your own until you met someone new, Wonwoo.

“One date. If you still hate the idea of dating me after that, I promise I’ll leave you alone.” Wonwoo looked two seconds away from getting on his knees and begging. He had sworn he did not believe in “love at first sight” until he saw you. As cliche as it sounds the sight of you was like looking into the sun. He’d told you so himself. To which you rolled your eyes in a very ladylike fashion and walked away. Back to the moment at hand, he had been asking you out for months. You were friends and he always presented date ideas in a respectful, light hearted manner but you knew he was serious. His eyes never told a lie. Looking up into those big brown orbs it broke your heart to say no to him once again. “Wonwoo, no. I told you. I don’t wanna jeopardize our friendship.” He hadn’t seen you before. He only knew the new and improved you. You feared that opening up to him would agitate old wounds. You had lost enough people over the years and weren’t willing to lose Wonwoo too. “Come on Sunshine, you know that wouldn’t happen. We won’t let it.” Despite what you thought to be your better judgment, you said yes.

First dates were awkward. Common knowledge, basic fact, first dates felt like having chicken pox. Except this was Wonwoo, and of course it wasn’t awkward. He was still your dorky best friend. He knew you, better than you knew yourself. He took you to a drive in movie. You sat in the car and cracked jokes and threw popcorn at each other. The night ended with ice cream and Wonwoo walked you to your door. “So..am I gonna get another date?” He asked hopefully. You saw his ears tinge pink under the porch light. You pretend to think about it. Just to watch him squirm before you smile at him, “Yes, I´d actually really like that”. The smile that stretches across Wonwoo’s face is forever burned in your memory. He sweeps you into a hug, before bidding you goodnight. That night you call your best friend, you recount every moment in detail. She knows before you do that you’re falling in love.

Wonwoo picks you up the following Friday, a beautiful bouquet of daisies in his hand.”You ready Sunshine?” He asks as he takes your hand. “Well, I’d say yes but I don’t know where we are going.” He chuckles and leads you to the car before opening the door, “Do you trust me?”. “With my life,” you reply earnestly as you get in the passenger seat. Trusting him was the easiest thing you had ever done. From the moment you met him Wonwoo had been nothing but reliable. It didn’t matter if it was 2am or snowing, he found a way to be there for you. Never one to disappoint, that was Wonwoo through and through.

When the car finally comes to a stop after an hour's drive to the outskirts of the city, the sight in front of you almost makes you cry. You were at a sky lantern festival. At the beginning of your friendship, you had mentioned how you wanted to go to him. He remembered. “Wonwoo..” you begin, you don't know what you had to say. Wonwoo just looks at you and smiles warmly before getting out of the car. You're unbelievably touched. Wonwoo was by all means not an outdoors person, but the fact he held on to your words and went out of his way, brings tears to your eyes. After retrieving your lanterns the two of you find a space on the large expanse of grass. You both sit down and start decorating your respective lanterns when an idea hits you. You grab your notebook from your bag and rip out a page. Wonwoo looks over at you puzzled, “What are you doing?” “Let’s make a wish. Write your wish on the paper, when the wish comes true we tell each other.” Wonwoo agrees because how could he ever say no to you. You finish your lanterns and release them at the end of the festival, wishes tucked safely in your respective pockets. That night when Wonwoo walks you to your door, he asks you to be his girlfriend.

Two years later Wonwoo takes you back to the same field that held the lantern festival, and proposes. In the ring box, there is a small piece of paper that you recognize from a notebook that has been long forgotten. You recognize Wonwoo’s chicken scratch. “Y/N” with a small heart. “Sunshine, you were always my wish. Will you marry me?” You launch yourself at him sobbing. “So, is that a yes?” he asks cheekily. “In every language. Oui, Si, Ja, Yes.”

On the car ride home, Wonwoo sees you digging around your bag for something. “What are you looking for?” “Hold on. I know it's in here somewhere.” You bring out your wallet before unzipping it. You shuffle around for a second before pulling out a small piece of paper. “What’s that?” Wonwoo asks as he glances over before returning his attention back to the road. “My wish” you state proudly. “Oh yeah? What was your wish?” You flash him your brightest smile before unfolding it and showing him. There is your delicate handwriting. He sees his name “Wonwoo” with a smiley face. Wonwoo swears his heart is gonna explode. “You made me believe in love again. You restored my faith in humanity. You made me whole.” You tell him through your tears. Wonwoo pulls the car over and cradles your face, wiping your tears. “No, Sunshine. You did that all by yourself. I’m just here to appreciate your hard work.” He kisses you.

[xxlady-lunaxx]

Yeah so I had this idea to write a Senjuro as a Spider Demon AU (inspired by this/ty to some1 on discord for finding the link for me<3), sooo I had to write it haha- This is from Kyojuro’s POV! I’ll write little extra things for Senjuro when he was a demon, this is just random angst for the AU / and thank you to @asamiutsuki for helping me edit<3

Word count: 2.5k words aprox.

Rui had been watching Senjuro from a distance for a while now and had seen how great of a bond the Rengoku’s had. And he wanted it. Eventually, an opportunity arose. Kokushibo came with him.

Senjuro, for a while now, had felt as though he’d been being watched. He played it off as paranoia, however. His father was getting worse and he hadn’t seen Kyojuro in months now. One day, after his father had been particularly explosive, he went out for a walk at night. He was approached by demons.

Nobody heard of him since then.

Nobody knew about Senjuro being persuaded by Rui. The offer of having a good family, a better life, standing in front of him, just in his reach. The idea of escaping his father who berated him for simply breathing too loudly, the chance to have no reason to worry every second about his brother. Nobody knew that Senjuro took the mirage splayed in front of him, made it reality, chancing the offer that formed in the shape of blood. He molded himself into it, swallowing the red in his cupped hands and then picked up by a demon with six eyes and carried away as the change began to form him.

Shinjuro quickly sent word to Kyojuro, asking if Senjuro was with him when, the following day, he was nowhere to be seen. When nothing came of it and Kyojuro had searched without success for Senjuro, the worst was assumed. Kyojuro’s fear heightened as they made no progress, day after day. Both Rengoku’s searched when they could and, in this, Shinjuro ended up pausing his addiction to Sake, worried sick for his youngest (which took him a while to admit).

Naturally, after months of dead ends, Senjuro was proclaimed dead. It was, of course, to Shinjuro and Kyojuro’s devastation. It was more than just the loss. It was the knowledge that Senjuro could’ve run away and his fate had met him, the guilt of thinking they could’ve protected him if they had only known where he was. It was the unknown part of the death that sent them both spiraling in grief.

Kyojuro took it better than Shinjuro, however, deciding that Senjuro would’ve wanted him to keep being a Hashira and not follow in his father’s footsteps. So he continued on, but not without a sort of emptiness that haunted him.

He was sent on a mission, as always, one night. It was late, however. Apparently he and Giyuu would be sent together, there were demons on a mountain that were killing every slayer that had passed for months now. Hashira were required.

He entered the mountain without hesitation, swerving through the trees and trying not to look too hard at the corpses that were strewn along the branches. Were the demons simply killing for fun, then? It was much worse than when they were hungry, they couldn’t help that. But if these demons had enough time and energy to go about and killing people then leaving them to rot as they pleased, it had to be of the 12 kizuki.

He and Giyuu split up and then Kyojuro was running straight into some bushes. He had noticed peculiar strings, silvery and thin, like a spider web, only stronger. They were all closing in through the bushes where he was heading. Instantly, he sensed that he was approaching a demon and unsheathed his katana.

He burst through, ignoring the leaves that scattered around him. Then he froze, arm raised with his katana in front of him. Before him sat a demon, skin pale as the moon, red dots in a demon pattern scattered on his cheeks. And his hair, oh, his hair. White with the tips red like Kyojuro’s. Like a white fire. Pulled back in a small pony tail, just like… Senjuro.

Kyojuro’s mind worked it out in a split second. Yet it took him another to process ot all. This was Senjuro. Not just a look-alike. Senjuro had turned into a demon.

Senjuro seemed to have recognized him, too, eyes wide and hands shaking. Neither moved for a moment, stunned silent. Then Kyojuro spoke. His voice was quiet and utterly calm. The contrast to his usual self scared Senjuro.

“Senjuro…?” he asked, his voice cracking. He didn’t know what to say. How was Senjuro alive? No, that was obvious. Perhaps he had been attacked by a demon but the blood had entered a wound? Or… had it been by choice? He hesitated, unsure what to say. Then—“Have you killed anyone? Eaten a human?”

His intention was clear. If Senjuro hadn’t eaten anybody, hadn’t killed anyone, there was a chance he could follow in Nezuko’s steps. Maybe they could go back to how they were before, in some ways. They could ask Tanjiro for a bit of help then they could go back to before Senjuro had ‘died.’ And yet.

And yet Senjuro averted his eyes, lowering his hands. He said nothing.

It was enough of an answer already. Still, Kyojuro repeated himself, shouting now. There was an edge to his voice, he sounded like he was struggling with himself. “HAVE YOU? HAVE YOU KILLED…—“ he sucked in a shaky breath, then let it out. “I’m sorry.”

Senjuro had flinched at the sound. He had always been terrified when Shinjuro shouted. Even now, he was still scared of yelling. Kyojuro’s heart ached at this, put it wasn’t the time to feel sad. Despite his brother seemingly coming back to life as a man-eating demon, he had to keep his composure.

“I’m sorry,” he repeated. “I… Senjuro. Senjuro, can you tell me if you’ve killed or eaten…?”

Senjuro let out a shaky breath. He seemed to be crying. “I’m sorry,” he echoed quietly. “Sorry, sorry, sorry—I’m sorry!” His words were scattering now, repeating himself and sobbing. “I’m so, so sorry… I didn’t- I wanted- I’m sorry—Kyojuro, please, I’m sorry…!”

When his name was spoken, Kyojuro broke. The hand with his blade lowered, though he did not offer his attention the same freedom. He would never let down his guard again—not since Senjuro had disappeared. He risked a step forward, leaves crunching dully under his feet.

Senjuro’s shoulders shook as he resisted tears that flowed freely nonetheless. His chin was tucked down to his chest as he avoided Kyojuro’s gaze. He looked up slowly, eyes teary, salty tracks dancing around the red dots on his face. He inhaled sharply, gulping for air, trying to calm himself but succeeding horribly. He opened his mouth several times, trying to deliver a cohesive response. In the end, he managed to whisper, “I… I did.”

Kyojuro’s world seemed to tip over from the two small words and he staggered slightly. The answer had been obvious enough but Senjuro confirming it made it… so much worse. He raised his katana again, gripping the handle tightly to try and calm his nerves—which was practically impossible.

Senjuro seemed to grasp what was happening and lowered his head again. “I’m sorry,” he repeated, voice tight with regret.

“I’ll tell father you said that,” Kyojuro murmured. “And I’m sorry too. For not doing enough to keep you safe.”

Then, before he could have second thoughts, his katana went slashing down. He was careful to use a gentle form, hoping it would give Senjuro even the slightest bit of relief before he was sent to hell. They both knew there was no going back for him.

And, as Senjuro slowly disintegrated, the two brothers gazed at each other, emotions stirring between both of their eyes.

“I love you,” Senjuro mouthed, blinking tears from his eyes. He wanted to look away, to not see the betrayal that was written so clearly now in Kyojuro’s eyes. He was gone before Kyojuro could respond.

There was a moment in which Kyojuro simply stood there, arms slack. Then he let out a stifled sob, pressing the back of his hand to his mouth as he turned to proceed with his mission. It was like he was grieving all over again, in a million different ways. God, what had become of him? Of Senjuro? Why?

As he ran through the forest, Giyuu intercepted his way. “Rengoku. The demons are dead, there is only the matter of—“ he paused, eyes widening by a fraction when he saw the mess Kyojuro was. “…is everything alright? Are you hurt?”

He received no response and, concern increasing as he noticed that Kyojuro seemed to be shaking slightly, he tried again, “Rengoku?”

Kyojuro appeared to have just noticed him and looked up, offering a tight smile, appreciating the concern. “I’m alright. I apologize for being little help in the mission, but I’m glad you’ve managed well. Have you sent the crow to get the Kakushi?”

Giyuu nodded slowly, eyebrows furrowing slightly. He clearly didn’t believe Kyojuro, but let it go. He wouldn’t be of help to Kyojuro emotionally, so he figured he would let the Hashira work it out himself.

“I have,” he confirmed. “Our work is done, now.”

Kyojuro nodded back. “Okay. Thank you.”

Giyuu gave him one last look before turning and leaving him alone.

The first thing he did after making sure everyone was alright—putting on the best smile he could to not worry the Kakushi—was to head home at once. Shinjuro was possibly worse than ever, not having allowed Kyojuro to console him after Senjuro’s supposed death and the months after. Now he sat in Senjuro’s room for the third time that week, legs crossed and eyes closed. Dark circles rimmed under his eyes, making him look all the more older. He was sitting in front of Senjuro’s bed, the whole room looking untouched and dusty after a year.

That was how Kyojuro found his father in the light of early dawn. At once, Shinjuro perceived that something was wrong. It wasn’t the fact that Kyojuro had come home unannounced, nor the time in which he’d arrived. It was the troubled look on Kyojuro’s solemn face, the absence of a smile.

“What is it?” he asked irritably, despite the premonition.

“Father,” Kyojuro started, kneeling outside the room. He bowed his head, fiery strands slipping over his shoulders. “Senjuro says he’s sorry.”

It took him a moment to understand. But when he did, Shinjuro’s head shot up as he stared at his son, perplexity and a bit of hope lining his expression. “What? What’re you talking about? He’s dead.”

Kyojuro flinched at the word. Despite having used it to refer to his brother for the past year, he found that it rung differently now. It was his own fault that Senjuro was dead, even if he hadn’t really had a choice. He let out a breath.

“I know. I killed him,” he said. He delivered the words calmly, somehow, trying to level his voice. But right after, he found himself at his breaking point once more.

Shinjuro looked utterly lost now, the hope disappearing, replaced by shock and more confusion. “Are you delusional? Have you been drinking?”

Kyojuro opened his mouth to respond, but only a strangled sob left his lips as tears struggled from his eyes. He had cried once they had announced that Senjuro had died the first time. He had cried alone, many times before as desperation took over when Senjuro could not be found. And he cried now, knowing full well that there wasn’t the slightest hope of Senjuro coming back, that he had killed his own brother and that Senjuro hadn’t fought back in the very least.

And strangely, this was the only time Shinjuro found it in himself to comfort him. He opened his arms, as he had done time and time again before when Kyojuro was younger. Instinctively, Kyojuro crawled towards him, burying his face in his father’s shoulder and letting his grief overtake him. Perhaps it was because he didn’t understand what was happening, perhaps it was because he was tired, or maybe something else altogether, but either way, Shinjuro’s arms wrapped around Kyojuro, rubbing his back gently and soothing him with the quiet hum of his voice.

Eventually, the story poured out of him. At first in stuttering words—“Senjuro… He- He was- I was on… Mt. Natagumo. For… a mission? He was… there.”—and then stronger, clearer, slowly raising himself from the embrace and drawing his gaze up to his father’s—“He kept… apologizing. I do think he regretted it, but I don’t know what it was. I don’t know why he turned into a demon in the first place. Supposedly it was by force… but he seemed clear minded, not under the influence of the demonic sense like other demons.”

Shinjuro listened patiently, not interrupting though he made several attempts at first. Though he didn’t intercept, his expression contorted several times—in anger, in confusion, in disappointment, and something else Kyojuro couldn’t percieve. When he finished, Kyojuro had settled back into his father’s lap, despite being basically the same size as him. Shinjuro hadn’t said anything yet and simply gazed down at their intertwined hands, mostly in disbelief.

Then he looked up.

“Kyojuro?”

“Yes, father?” Kyojuro was still, naturally, wary of him. Yet he did his best to hide it, not wanting Shinjuro to lapse back into his previous self.

“I’m sorry, too,” Shinjuro said. He spoke calmly, enunciating every word. But he looked away in shame, for having to be saying this at all.

“What?”

“I’m sorry for treating you both how I did. It was probably why Senjuro left to turn into a demon. You weren’t able to help him and I was useless, feeding onto his… what? Fear? Anger? Whatever drove him to become a demon,” Shinjuro concluded, quietly now.

There was a beat of silence. And then a sudden flash of what could’ve been comparable to thunder, splitting the quiet in half. A stinging pain on Shinjuro’s cheek followed, almost as an afterthought, and he turned his head back to his son, eyes wide.

Kyojuro was glaring at him, the hand he had slapped him with still held up. “Don’t say that! It’s not your fault. Even if he did go willingly, it was his own choice. We all make mistakes, no matter how drastic, and he was young and under pressure with a brother constantly in death’s hand and a father who was still grieving over his deceased wife. I’m not saying he made a good decision, I’m saying that his reason was not, even if you took part in it, solely because of you. Okay? I don’t want you going back to how you were before. Senjuro’s death—or his becoming of a demon—wasn’t your fault! Mother’s death wasn’t your fault. If—when—my death comes, it will not be your fault!” Kyojuro snapped. He was close to raising his voice and, in the tranquility of the morning, his last words echoed briefly in the room.

Shinjuro remained staring at him, stunned, unable to respond for a couple faltering moments. His hand had reached up to cup his injured cheek but it fell to his lap now as he stumbled to reply. “I… sorry,” he mumbled, caving. “I’m so sorry.”

Kyojuro sighed and hugged his father tightly. “Me too. I’m sorry, too.”

[queenoftheferns]

Harley, Woodrue, and The Green: An in-depth analysis of Poison Ivy (2022)

(Discalaimer: This is an analysis of vol. 1 -issues 1-6- of the Poison Ivy series by G Willow Wilson, and it doesn’t take any later events into account. This is also over 2,400 words long so buckle up)

Hi!! I watched a video on how to analyse things and was inspired- I loved the first bit of Poison Ivy’s series and had a lot of fun going super in-depth into the writing, symbolism and psychology of Poison Ivy.  So let’s get into it! 

First, to make things easier, I’m going to assign some new meanings to the words “change” and “transformation”.  Although this is not how these words usually work, in this analysis “change” refers to the way you choose to evolve. Change comes from within yourself and is never something forced. “Transformation” on the other hand, is something done to you by someone/something else. It is a violation of your personal autonomy and it erases your identity with a new one deemed as “better” by the other person’s standards. Now. Back to Ivy.

Transformation: What it means to Ivy

This theme appeares a lot in Ivy’s story. Her first instance of transformation is with Woodrue who experiments on her- transforming her body and mind against her will. He’s the one who first introduces this concept of “out with the old- in with the new”- something we end up seeing a lot of in Ivy’s ideology. “Nature is not sentimental” Woodrue says, “the strong consume the weak… this is the virtuous cycle.” The fact that “Virtuous Cycle” is the title of Vol. 1 should tell us a bit about how much Ivy has carried these ideas with her (more on that later).

[ID: A picture from the comic depicting Ivy's flashback to Woodrue's experiment. Narration: "She thinks it's going to kill her." Woodrue: "Nature is not sentimental. The strong consume the weak and then excrete them to fertilize the earth. That is the virtuous cycle. Consume. Digest. Renew." /end ID]

Like many villains (and heroes for that matter), she draws a clear line between her two identities. In her eyes, the identity of “Pamela Isley” represents everything wrong with humanity: she’s shortsighted and can’t see the bigger picture beyond her own emotions and she failed to acheive her goals because of her human need for love and validation. The identity of “Poison Ivy,” however, has embraced her transformation and has let her old identity be completely eradicated. Ivy isn’t human, she’s Greater, More Than human. She can see the bigger picture, the one humans could see if they weren’t so wrapped up in their silly mortal relationships. Poison Ivy is untouchable. 

Until she’s not. Until her body is transformed against her will once again at the end of “Fear State,” but this time not into something stronger or greater. Although Ivy’s anger at Harley (issue #1) is in no way justified, it makes a little more sense when you consider how reminiscent this is of her backstory: changed forever against her will by the actions of someone she loves, cutting her off from her relationships (with Woodrue her green skin and powers/pheremones cut her off from humans, with Harley and Gardner she was cut off from her relationships with plants and the Green), and destroying all of her ideas for what her future would look like. 

[ID: A picture from the comic where Ivy is losing her green skintone and preparing to drink the vial of Ophiocordyceps Lamia. Narration: "Every day I lose a little more of the power of Queen Ivy. Soon enough I'll be back to my old self. As the invincible parts of me die away. But there is one last chance to salvage something from all this. One final opportunity to carry out the will of the Green..." /end ID]

Of course Harley didn’t know that would happen and had just wanted to save her girlfriend, but she, and the readers, can also understand how triggering and painful it must have been for Ivy and that it’s realistic for her to lash out at first. What Harley doesn’t see is this: That Ivy’s spent years hating her past self and seeing Pamela Isley as the epitome of human weakness- and now she’s her again. From here on out, Pamela’s views of humanity as a whole are directly related to her view of herself. She thinks that humans aren’t essential to the environment, so she tells Harley “you saved the parts of me that didn’t mtter”.  She beleives all of humanity must die via the Opiocordyceps Lamia, and although she makes an exception for Harley she doesn’t make one for herself. In her conversation with dream Harley, what they say (“It’s not too late to fix a mistake.”/“I wish that were true.” etc.) could be applied to either humanity as a whole or to Ivy’s view of herself as broken and unfixable. And, as her view of herself evolves, her view of humanity evolves with it. 

[ID: Image one. Ivy and Harley are having an argument after Ivy has lost her connection to the Green. Harley: "We were trying to save your life!" Ivy: "You saved the parts of me that didn't matter!" Image two. A shot of a man consumed by the Ophiocordyceps Lamia. Narration: "Sucking up every resource on this planet until all that's left is a ball of superheated concrete. The only way to save this beatiful marble is to get rid of us. Every one of us. Even me. Because there is only one person who deserves all this beauty. And that's you." /end ID]

To carry out her new plan, Pamela goes “back to the beginning” and steals the Opiocordyceps Lamia from Jason Woodrue. It’s clear she still feels that she needs something from Woodrue in order to be Poison Ivy- after all, he’s her creator. Her breakup with Harley and her plans going forward seem to have grown from her desperate desire to prove that she’s still not entirely human, and won’t make human mistakes. In the first few issues, we get the sense that she would (at this point in her story) rather die than be Pamela Isley again. For her, escaping Pamela Isley means embracing the ideology of the man that killed her. Of course, Ivy doesn’t see it that way, but it’s not hard for us to see in the way she attempts to transform the other humans against their will like what Woodrue did to her. Watching the human’s shock and betrayal fade into awe that the beauty of the Green is reminiscent of how Ivy herself learned to love her connection to the Green despite the pain of her original transformation.

[ID: A scene from the comic where Janet is talking with Ivy while being consumed by the Ophiocordyceps Lamia. Narration: "Janet is part of something else now. Part of the life cycle of this riverbank." Janet: It's so beautiful. So clean. Like starting over." Ivy: "Right? Now you can see it too." Janet: "I want to see everything like you see. Take me with you. I don't want to go back to... to that." /end ID]

She also inherits Woodrue’s view of the natural world as something detatched from humanity with no room for human kindness and love (JW: “Nature is not sentimental”/PI: “Nature isn’t cruel, just efficient”). The same way Ivy unknowingly spreads Woodrues ideology, she is also unknowingly spreading his mind control virus in the form of Opiocordyceps Lamia. Throughout the story, transformation is a force of evil, violating someone’s autonomy in an attempt to make them a vessel for something greater. Yet the creator can never really control what people transform into…

Change: What it means to Ivy

Change is never on the table for Ivy. She is transformed by Woodrue and in turn tries to transform the planet and humanity. In every instance, whether it be about society or Ivy herself, her mindset is always that change is too late. Our life courses are set in stone by our own nature unless we are transformed by some greater force. This is why Ivy seeks out Woodrue after losing her connection to the Green, and why she is so focused on following the “will of the Green” rather than doing what she wants to. She doesn’t trust herself to make the right decisions (she’s been wrong too many times) so instead she wants some Other Force to transform her into someone who doesn’t make human mistakes. This rejection of change and worship of transformation was the basis of Ivy’s ideology. Until…

…Harley Quinn! Seeing Harley in this comic always brings with it a mild sense of disbelief. She seems so out of place within the comic’s mood and aesthetic… and I realized that it’s for a good reason. Harley Quinn is the epitome of change, she’s multifaceted and unpredictable and her path in life is never fixed. First she was going to become a gymnast, but then she was a psychologist, but then she fell in love with the Joker, but then she left him, but then she went back, and just when you think you see a pattern, when you think you know what she’ll do next, Harley does something else. She breaks up with the Joker for good, she falls in love with Ivy, they break up but not really, she starts to become a hero but her redemption arc itself is filled with messiness and unpredictability and all of it was her choice. Sure there was more than a little manipulation on the Joker’s part, but at the end of the day Harley chose to jump into that vat of acid— she wasn’t pushed.

[ID: Image one. A picture from the Gardener Files comic showing Ivy in a cell meeting Harley. Bella's Narration: "After years trapped in an echo chamber of her own dark thought, a woman was place in an adjacent cell. A young woman madle in love with a monster, trapped in a cycle of abuse. Harley Quinn." Image two. A scene from the end of the Fear State saga with Harley and Ivy talking. Ivy: "There's one more thing I need to to..." Ivy pulls Harley closer with vines. Harley: "Hoo-boy... Pammy... I know this is a lot to process and you don't like when I get all meddly... but I'm trying to be a good guy and save the city and junk-" Ivy: "Harley, stop talking." Harley: "Okay." The two kiss. Image three. Harley and Ivy from Ivy's dream in Poison Ivy (2022). Ivy: "I can't. I've gone to far to turn back now." Dream Harley: "It's never too late to fix a mistake." /end ID]

In every respect, Harley’s mere existence is the most persuasive argument against Ivy’s ideology. Although this might seem like a roadblock in their relationship, it’s actually the reson Ivy loves her so much. Harley’s ability to change is everything Ivy wishes humanity (and herself) could be. If more people were like Harley, not held back by societal norms and not paralyzed by the fear that it’s “too late” to change, then maybe Ivy could have more hope for humanity. (I can imagine Ivy, bored and self-righteous, meeting Dr. Quinzel for the first time, thinking she knows exactly what to expect from a young, naive psychologist. Then beginning to fall for Harley as she smashes Ivy’s expections again and again. That’s what a good joke is after all: building up an expectation and then subverting it. Anyways. Back to Ivy).

Ivy's Arc

Ultimately, Ivy/Pamela’s story is about her relationship to her own humanity, and the other characters’ role in the plot is to tug Pamela back and forth between two perspectives: Humanity (and by extension, Pamela) being irredeeamble and in need of a deadly transformation, vs humanity (and Pamela) having inherent value and being capable of changing and turning things around. Woodrue beleives that the only way to thrive in this dying world is to take advantage of the struggle around him to benefit himself. This is reflected in George Holloran, the boss at the packaging company Ivy works at for all of ten minutes (issue #4). Like Woodrue, he accepts the state of the world with no attempt to change anything, deciding to climb to the top of the hierarchy instead of trying to dismantle it. The guys at the bar (#1) also mirror this with their focus on satisfying their own desire rather than treat a woman with respect and (unlike Harley) do not stray even a little from Ivy’s expectations. They and Woodrue represent Ivy’s worst assumptions about humanity: that everyone is ruled by their own desire for power and pleasure and are incapable of changing or growing because of how society has shaped them. 

[ID: A panel of Jason Woodrue as Floronic Man. Woodrue: "This planet is too far gone to save, Pamela. It needs a revolution, but all it wants is a band-aid. So we might as well make millions selling band-aids." /end ID]

[ID: A scene where George Halloran is being consumed by the Ophiocordyceps Lamia. George: "It's just hard, you know? To be the boss. At first you want everybody to like you. Th-then you realize it doesn't work. They hate you anyway. Because you're all in the same system. And the system chews people up. S-so you start to do things you shouldn't because you start to hate them back. You f-figure out that fear is more effective than love. And that's... when it all... goes dark." /end ID]

On the other hand, however, are characters like Jesslyn and Timothy at the packaging company (#4), Carrie at the motel (#3), Jenny Bolger at the restaurant (#2), and of course, Harley Quinn. Other than Harley, all of these characters are people struggling to make meaningful change in the confines of their normal lives under capitalism. Whether it’s through art, human connection, or focusing on a small peice of earth you can control, these people show Ivy what change looks like. It’s not as flashy and sudden as Ivy’s plan to transform everyone, and these aren’t the kind of stories Ivy would’ve known about had she simply looked on the news. But the willingness of all these people to at least try to help the world and each other is enough to make Ivy question her assumptions on the fixedness of human nature. 

[ID: Two panels, one with Ivy and one with Carrie, the lady Ivy meets at the motel. Narration: "It's too early to make exceptions. Yet somehow, that's exactly what I find myself doing." Ivy: "-I don't want to get dirt all over you." Carrie: "Well. Suit yourself." /end ID]

When on her own, Ivy has no particular character growth, but when she is with these people, the good people, or when she has memories of Harley, those are the moments we see her grow and change. Ivy says she has faith in the world while working with Carrie, and her will to live comes back after sleeping with Jesslyn. And of course, everything always comes back to Harley, the love of her life. In the end, Ivy defeats Woodrue not because of her ideology but because he made the mistake of threatening Harley. This is the moment a lot of her developement has been leading up to. She’s lost all her powers, even the ones given to her by the Lamia. Like when she first became Poison Ivy, Woodrue has complete control over her body. Like before, she had trusted his science when she shouldn’t have. Manipulated, weak, and abandoned by the Green, there is barely anything left of Poison Ivy. She is almost entirely human. Almost entirely Pamela. Finally, she has no choice but to rely on her human instincts- her love for, and desire to protect, another human. And it works. Pamela Isley succeeded where Poison Ivy failed because of  her humanity- not in spite of it.

[ID: A scene with Ivy and Woodrue in the comic, Woodure is forcing Ivy to hold a knife to her own neck via the Ophiocordyceps Lamia. Narration: "-simply have to accept that you've failed. Your enemy has won. And no one is coming to help." Woodrue: "And then I'm going to track down your little blonde girlfriend. --And I'm doing to turn her inside out. Not for any scientific purposes. Just because I can." Narration: "But that's not what happened this time." /end ID]

This is what ultimately opens her eyes to how, actually, these human instincts and human desires are what’s going to save the world. Her desire to protect Harley is the same as her deisre to protect the planet, which is the same as Carrie’s drive to save the plot of land by the motel, which is the same as Jenny’s drive to create art, and Jesslyn and Timothy’s drive to reach out to others and support each other in a hostile environment. After meeting a child and sensing the ecosystems he contained, Pamela comes to the conclusion that “we are the Green”. She realizes that our humanity is a feature, not a bug. We were designed to be here, and to love and protect the world and people around us. It’s when some people deny their humanity (for personal gain like Woodrue, or fear and self-hate like Ivy) that we start causing harm. 

[ID: A scene from the comic where Ivy is picturing the faces of Jesslyn, Jenny and the nice guy from the restaurant. Narration: "Home. The only home any of us will ever have. Because nobody without billions of dollars to burn is going anywhere. And because-- after all-- we're not so bad. We can still gorw things. Gardens. Communities. Friendships. Against all odds. I realize, here at the end of everything, that I've been fighting the wrong people. Because it was easier. Easier than fighting the real enemies." /end ID]

[ID: A scene where Ivy is reaching out to a child who's handing her back her scarf. Narration: "--but when I look at this child, I see more than just one individual. We float in our own ecosystem of symbiotic bacteria. We exhale and the trees inhale. Billions of tiny organisms call our bodies home. To the microscopic beings alive on his skin, this child is the entire universe." Ivy: "...We are the Green." /end ID]

In eating Woodrue’s corpse (Iconic, by the way), she shows that she understands now that the blame for what he did to her lies with him, not her. In the end, she tells Harley that she “made me understand that we have to protect what is truly precious.” In other words, helped Ivy understand that protecting people is protecting the Green. She signs her name as “Pammy”, not “Ivy” or “Ives”. Maybe this is just because Harley calls her that, or maybe it’s because the identity of Pamela Isley has finally proven herself to Ivy.

[ID: A comic scene of Harley Quinn reading Ivy's letter (which is also the narration.) Narration/Letter: " --you've made me understand that we have to protect what is truly precious. I love you. And only you. Until the end of the world. No matter what. Always and forever, Your Pammy." /end ID]

If you read this far, THANK YOU!!! I love analysing stuff and hope to put out some more Poison Ivy analysis in the future. In the meantime, I really, really appreciate any comments, questions, or even disagreements. I would love nothing more than to have a conversation about Poison Ivy in the notes.

[mono-blogs-art]

The Loyal Pin episode 14 was both very fun and very frustrating.

Let me preface this by saying it very clearly: I never don't enjoy my time with this show. It has consumed my brain for the past 2+ months and I love this show and I'm sad we are getting into the last 2 episodes now. But this episode was admittedly a lot of screen time and nothing happening that brings us forward. Which is somewhat disappointing especially after last week's episode 13 which I thought was probably the best episode in the entire show so far.

I don't have a huge essay like last week, but three points that I would like to point out. First, as much as I LOVE the trio of Anin/Anan/Prik and their shenanigans, the comedic tone the show took was just misplaced this late in the show. Especially while the other main character is crying in every scene she's in. I understand that because of the pacing and the fact that we have time to fill before the wedding gets inevitably crashed (which needs to be the cliffhanger, of course), a prolonged sequence of chase scenes and a stake-out is necessary (+ gives some very deserved appreciation to Prik, who is the best side character) but I feel like the time could have been allotted better.

Secondly, Anin immediately not respecting her own boundaries she sets with Pin is funny (she is loosing the IDGAF war so much) but especially after hearing that in the book, she does go away and is not around for basically all of what happened this episode, I'm sad!!! She set a clear line, she never wants to see Pin again and she's finally giving herself space to grieve fully, and then she immediately goes back to investigating Kuea and his wife and fighting for Pin risking it all. Girl, I understand you are down horrendous and that you are courageous and righteous and the only Gentleman™️ this show has, but at some point you need to respect yourself a little. I understand this was also likely done for production constraints, you can't really have your main actress be absent for a whole episode etc. Just purely from a narrative standpoint it's frustrating because it feels like backtracking an important point that last episode made about Anin's development. But...

The worst offense is Pin. Babygirl I said I would always be on your side but I can't defend you any longer. You are giving into the doomerism and martyrhood too much. As a viewer, Pin is our main character, and part of the enjoyment of watching a high-stakes drama like this is that at some point the protagonists take a chance. In TLP, that chance was now - when Pin was at her very lowest point at the wedding. And she is suffering. She is absolutely destroyed. But she endures it all because, like Anin says in the beginning of the episode: "I bet you still think that the decision you made was the right one." It's incredibly frustrating because it just feels like Anin has made leaps in character development while Pin retracted back. I understand that she is doing her very best, and in-universe she is doing everything she can within her power - but AGAIN, AS A VIEWER it becomes frustrating at a point when your girl doesn't fight back at all and becomes a pawn in her own story. And I don't even expected Pin to defy authority actively this episode. I was hoping for even just like, a sliver of hesitation. A silent resignation. A passive act of letting her true emotions bubble over. Like having no strength to hold up her hands for the King to pour the water at the ceremony. Or look up into Princess Patt's face and be unable to stop the tears. Anything. But no, Pin is stronger than me, and she endures it all and smiles through most of it. Noble, yes. Sure. But in a way that makes me feel like the character really just plummets deeper into the abyss and refuses to even look for a rope.

That said, there was a lot of good stuff this episode too. Anin & Uangfah's conversation in the car was great - Uangfah truly is Pin's only other ally. Both of Anin and Pin's confrontations were great, especially the first one where Anin (who is physically smaller) remained stood on the stairs for the whole conversation so she could still look down at Pin. It's simple but good. The second confrontation was also great, with Anin turning away when her voice breaks and the tears start rolling because she can't look at Pin giving up anymore. Throwing away the ring. Pin telling her outright that she will suffer forever and bear the pain, which she thinks she deserves, and Anin just looks at her like; What the Fuck are you on about?? The acting? Top. Tier. Truly. The cinematography? There were multiple shots where me and my watchbuddy @transimailisa called out: "Wow, that just looks like a painting." Anin going to the beach and not telling anyone so she doesn't have to attend the wedding? Amazing, and drawing a line even if it should have been earlier. That shot of Pin in her (GORGEOUS) wedding gown, sitting alone in her room with just the bunny? Fucking. Devastating.

There's so much to love with this show. And I'm really looking forward to episodes 15 & 16. I just wanted to voice some of my criticism with this particular episode. See you next week!