#but the fact that they are doesn't make it seem more real?

[gabessquishytum]

The ton of London is abuzz with the latest drama unfolding between Morpheus Endless and his father, Lord Time, over the question of the former’s marriage and just who is meant to meet him at the altar.

From almost the beginning of the Season, everyone had been treated to the sweet and clear courtship of Morpheus by Mr. Hob Gadling. It seemed to be love at first sight, and from a practical standpoint was considered to be a rather good match; Hob might have been new money, but what he lacked in connections he more than made up in wealth, looks, and honest charm. The Endless family are well-connected and well-respected, and while Morpheus could possibly have held out for a more equally-connected match, he was a third child (thus bringing little status to a marriage, when compared to his elder siblings), and furthermore had been considered rather unapproachable, aloof and cold, at least until Hob had managed to melt that icy exterior.

It had gotten to the point where anyone paying attention expected to hear of a proposal any day now, when chaos erupted: Lord Time, who had evidently not been paying any attention to his son or his courtship, heard the match being talked of as a settled thing, and quite firmly announced that he would not allow it. That he had in fact been arranging Morpheus’ betrothal to Mr Roderick Burgess!

Society is shocked by such a choice. The Burgess family was nearly as nouveau riche as Mr. Gadling, but with a much worse reputation (and possibly less rich). And to Roderick, to whom most of the poor reputation belongs, and who has a grown son of his own! By every measure Hob Gadling is clearly the better catch, besides which Morpheus Endless’ honor is quite firmly engaged at this point, and it would be scandalous to jilt Mr. Gadling after such a blatant courtship for such an inferior alternative.

Yet Lord Time refuses to budge on his decision, and no amount of attempted persuasion by his acquaintances, children, or even his wife (who normally presents a united front with her husband), will convince him that this course of action will damage his family’s reputation and his son’s happiness.

Morpheus doesn’t intend to take this lying down however. He plans to put himself in increasing compromising positions with his real fiancée (who is fully on board with the plan), until he is either officially engaged to Hob or considered so thoroughly ruined that the Endless family’s reputation can never recover.

And so the ton holds its breath at this game of chicken, waiting to see which happens first: the son bending to his father’s stubborn will and submitting to the sanctioned match, or the father breaking against the son’s determined willingness to drag the family name through the mud in order to marry his preferred suitor.

(Little does the ton know just how unlikely the former outcome is, as Morpheus loves Hob Gadling as strongly as he hates Roderick Burgess. Thus he is fully ready if necessary to bring himself and Hob off in the middle of a crowded ballroom, and make it very clear that this is not the first time they’ve engaged in pre-marital relations, if that’s what it takes)

Yes!!!!! I love these Bridgerton adjacent ideas for dreamling because those two are SO dramatic, you just know that they'd thrive in those conditions.

The nice thing about Hob being new money is that he doesn't really have much of a reputation to ruin, and no family to be disappointed in him. He cares very little about what anyone thinks of him; the only person he's interested in pleasing is Morpheus! And although he'd certainly prefer to save Dream’s reputation, for the sake of his beloved's place in society, Hob has no trouble at all in following Morpheus’s orders and misbehaving all over the place!

And it's certainly convenient, since they've been fucking ever since the Season began. Now Hob doesn't have to bother trying not to mark Morpheus’s neck above the line of his cravat. Hob has some well-placed conversations with some of the most notorious gossips in the ton, and soon enough everyone is craning their necks to see if the love bites are visible on Morpheus’s pretty white neck today...

Finally, Roderick Burgess seemingly can't take the idea of marrying a ruined slut like Morpheus any longer (despite the connections to the aristocracy, and all the benefits that would come with the marriage... Burgess can't cope with the fact that he would not be the first to break Morpheus in, so to speak). He breaks the deal with Lord Time, and what do you know, less than a week later, Morpheus and Hob are quietly married at an intimate little ceremony.

The ton decides to conveniently forget about the couple's scandalous behaviour - they're safely married now, so it's all quite alright. It was for the best that Morpheus married the man he clearly adored! And the honeymoon period seemingly hasn't ended either... at every ball of the next season, the newlyweds are bound to sneak off for old times sake, to some secret corner where they can renew their marital bliss. Not to mention what they get up to on the carriage ride home! It's quite clear to everyone (thanks to all the noises of satisfaction coming from behind the curtains) that Morpheus chose the right husband <3

[arcane-ish]

I know it's not a fun thing to think about it, and we have one more arc to think about it, but my worry is that the correct take from this is that the writers just have a different, more negative read on the relationship of Silco and Jinx.

Some interviews with cast members give me the vibe that they weren't that comfortable with the too positive read some fans had on Silco. (ie Ella Purnell for example)

My read on Silco as a character, as a person is that he was a guy who suffered trauma, who hardened, and it was important for his character development to grow to care about Jinx. But he's not the subject of this season. Jinx and Caitlyn and Vi are.

And it's not so much that there isn't enough time to do a montage to show Silco's softer side, it's that from Jinx's point of view, from her character development, Silco just isn't as positive a factor. (for the record, this imo doesn't just affect Silco. With Warwick we also didn't really get much about his torture and what it means to him to become the beast, his role also is heavily dictated by what his existance means for Vi and Jinx, like when the flashbacks of his past seemlessly roll over into the montage becoming about Vi's point of view of her mother and sister)

I read the writers interview with things like:

SCIFI VISION:   Yeah, it's definitely going to make a change, it sounds like. Talk about the fact that Jinx doesn't, I guess, at least right now, have anybody, now that Silco's gone, too. I mean, is that a good thing? Is that a bad thing? I mean, his influence isn't there, but I do think he actually cared about her, as crazy as he was. CHRISTIAN LINKE:   Yeah, I mean, it's the first time in Jinx's life where there isn't someone else telling her who she's supposed to be. In the beginning of her game, it's Vi, her big sister, who she really wants to impress and please. Then it's Silco, who really wants to make her, like, the most potent version of the talented weapons tinkerer that she is.

So, suddenly, the voices are gone, and she has to figure out for herself who she wants to be and what she wants to do, and that is a true first for her.

This reads like they see Jinx being "free" of Silco and figuring herself out as the positive aspect and I think in the show this being represented as her forming relationships and having some happiness and maybe even glipses of "Powder" showing up (when Silco insisted Powder was gone) or Jinx trying to reject being Jinx.

I think there's a good chance that it can't stay that way and Jinx goes back to being Jinx, but the issue is whether that is being portrayed as a bad and tragic thing. Because Act 2 certainly seems to feel wistful about the way Jinx is in it. (that said, there's certainly maybe some meta meaning to be mined on how Viktor's community seems beautiful but it's likely the wrong path/not the real deal)

From the show it's still clear that Jinx cares for Silco, but again in regards to his influence on her it seems to be a more mixed bag. Or even the show leaning towards Silco represents Jinx represents violence and it's something that makes Jinx unhappy and that she tries to back away from a bit.

Now there's a good chance that the death of Isha might put her in a vengeful state and have her go deeper into Jinx as a personality. But again with the open question being whether that makes her happy or actually unhappier.

Right now it feels like going deeper into Jinx seems to be more liked to her losing emotional connection from others (because she's withdrawing deeper into herself and becoming more abrasive with others).

I guess we will see in Act 3 if she goes more Jinx if she comes to enjoy it more and if Silco shows more up in connection to it. (I could see maybe a glimpse of Silco and Jinx's past relationship showing up at like a fundamental transition moment, like giving fully into Jinx or when she is close to death)

I think the problem is that for fans of Silco his relationship with Jinx represents a softening of his hard stance, while the writers from Jinx's point of view seem to mostly be casting as him representing her hardening. Rather than let's say, the softer aspects of their relationship being something that is guiding her out of a dark or hopeless moment.

(which again doesn't mean that Jinx feels negatively towards Silco or that what she takes from it is negativity. And I think there's still plenty of room to tell a story of his having positive influence on her. It starts with her letting go of him and one can argue that having the strenght of let go is an important thing to teach a person (especially if I see Jinx being haunted by the ghosts of Mylo and Claggor being symbols of her inability to let go). And even when Silco fans joke about Jinx's line about how things might have been different if Silco had found the letter, to me that is still a representaiton of Jinx having softer feelings, a softer read on Silco. Maybe it's an unrealistic take on him, but it's a softer take on him rather than her reading him as a negative and oppressive force in her life)

Okay, I'm rambling and not making much sense and we will know soon enough if Silco's role in regards to Jinx becomes more pronounced as she maybe embraces her Jinx side more. Or if the writers have just an a lot more mixed or negative view on his role in her life as it relates to her development. Or if they want to specifically write a story of her emancipating herself from both Vi and Silco and if she makes her choices towards violence or whatever she decides on they want it to be on her own terms rather than just being what Silco wanted. Because they want it to be truly HER story and her choices and not "actually this is the story of badass Silco who formed attachments, sacrificed himself for his daughter and triumphs from beyond the grave because she is finishing what he started because of his badass influence on her".

I guess what I want to say is that I don't think that there being no young Jinx & Silco flashback so far doesn't have to do with lack of time, but them going with a specific characterization for Jinx where her might for whatever reason (too fresh, emancipation, Silco being associated with violence and she is still in the grief phase, her memories not being as positive [people might not like it, but I get the impression if we compare how Jinx interacts with Isha if maybe her childhood with Silco she felt lonely despite his best efforts]) doesn't want to go there yet.

Can I get something off my chest? I was really hoping we'd get more flashbacks of Jinx and Silco together.

their backstory holds so much potential for deeper exploration, expanding on how he raised her after Vander's “betrayal” could have given more insight into how Jinx became who she is, and the complexity of their bond.

Scenes that truly delve into how he cared for her, how their bond was built over time.

I wanted to see those tender, fractured moments where he helped her navigate the chaos in her mind, whether through tough love, quiet support, or simply being there when she had no one else.

Moments where his stern but protective demeanor softened just for her. Maybe a glimpse of him patching her up after a dangerous mission, or the way he'd indulge her quirks when no one else could.

He wasn’t just her dad, he was her anchor in a world that had abandoned her, and it would’ve been fascinating seeing more of how he filled that role. Their bond was so complex god

There’s so much we don’t know, and so much that could have been shown, and I can’t help but feel like more flashbacks could have given it even greater depth.

[sunsetsover]

i went back and watched first ep of thk again this time without being psychologically flashbanged every 2 seconds (which was only semi-successful tbh) and my biggest take away out of everything was that bison really gets off on power.

you can see it clear as day in that very first scene with the guy that they're targeting. this is clearly someone who has money and power - he's picking men out of line up like they're nothing more than clothes on a rack. but the reality is that bison is the one who's really in charge. bison is the one who has all the control. bison literally has this big, powerful man's life in his hands, and he really, really likes that.

you can see it in the look on his face when he shoves the guys face into his chest - he's disgusted, clearly, but he's also smiling. he looks so deeply satisfied, and why would he in a situation like that if not for the fact that he knows he has all the power in the world in that moment and is almost a little turned on by it. it doesn't matter that the other guy thinks bison's some weak little guy to be bought and given commands. it doesn't matter he's sitting there all smug thinking he's in control. bison knows the truth. that's enough. it's probably why he can so easily play along - that knowledge. that power. because really, what does it matter how rich or powerful someone is now that bison has him in his clutches? and what is that if not complete and total power?

you can see this desire for power and control bleed into other dynamics too. i think it's why he's so 'difficult' with fadel. fadel clearly loves and cares about him, and his concern is well meaning, but he does treat bison like a child. and to a certain degree it's probably warranted (i mean look at what happened at the karaoke bar). but at the same time between him and the little bit we know so far about their mother, bison's completely smothered. and sheltered (the guy doesn't even know how to cook a burger. they literally run a diner). and i think that has less to do with bison being inherently untrustworthy or reckless, and more to do with the fact that he just doesn't want to do what he's told. and i imagine in turn that made his mum - and by extension fadel - tighten the reins on him.

because bison, at least so far, seems to have really no control or even any say over his own life. he just does what he's told, either his mother or by fadel. he has no other choice really - it seems he has nothing and no one else. he's effectively trapped (which i think will be the catalyst in his and kant's relationship, bc kant is also trapped in a situation he can't get out of, but i digress) so he's rallying against their control over him in whatever little ways he can - causing problems, being difficult, being purposefully obtuse. i think bison is someone who knows he doesn't have any real power, and so uses what he does have to his advantage. he plays dumb and weak and naive and sweet to manipulate people and situations so he can get what he wants for a change. that's his power. and it seems effective enough, and he probably likes the little things that it can get him, but i think what bison really likes is the fact that he can make people bend to his will. sure he has to work for it, but the fact that he can have people dancing to his tune while being completely unaware of what he's doing is what he really likes. i think that's where bison's true power lies. and i think that that power goes straight to his head.

which brings us to kant. kant, who - at least in my opinion - bison thought was just another guy with a big ego who just expected bison to lay down and take it. like idk i just got the impression that bison was not super impressed w kant at first. and bison does try briefly to wrestle kant for the dominance/power that kant obviously thought was his to take (like the tapping to see who was going to go to who, and getting in each others face to see who was going to break and kiss the other first) but soon enough bison just lets him have it bc ultimately it's not that important. they weren't supposed to ever see each other again. he was gonna get off either way. but even so bison gave as good as he's got, making sure kant knew he wasn't just gonna lie down and take it. and i think that at some point bison kinda realises hey this guy is actually listening. hey he's kinda malleable actually. hey he's kinda putting on a lil show for me, taking his shirt off nice and slow. hey this is a lot more fun than i thought it would be. but at the end of the day he doesn't get his shit rocked by kant the way kant clearly gets his shit rocked by bison. bison literally put that man to sleep. kant's lying on his sofa all but twirling his hair afterwards. in comparison bison doesn't even seem particularly bothered about the whole thing until kant shows up at the diner.

but anyway my point is we pretty much know bison's desire for power is going play out in his dynamic with kant bc of the whole bdsm thing. imo this is going to be even more important if it does turn out that he knows/suspects kant's motives - which, after a second watch, i am a lot more likely to believe. it was just so obvious. of all the things bison could've been doing right then, he just so happened to be cleaning the windows? with a big mirror right next to him? yeah ok sure. but don't expect me to act surprised if we find out down the line that bison was behind the scenes puppeteering this whole thing with kant - and with his family too.

because really the question is if he suspects kant's intentions - which he clearly did, no matter how briefly - why would he not tell fadel? why would he not seek help? and i think the answer to that lies - again - in the fact that bison wants power. any thread of it he can grab onto he does with both hands, whether that be that killing or domming or pissing people (fadel) off. playing games with people's minds and lives in that way - even those of the people closest to him, even his own - really doesn't seem like that much of a stretch judging by his behaviour so far. i think he'd probably be rubbing his hands together like an evil little fly at the thought of everyone thinking he was dumb or naive or a liability when the whole time he's the one pulling all the strings. he's the one who has everyone's lives in his hands. he's the one keeping all of their asses out of prison while at the same time he's got the guy who's supposed to be his downfall tied up in knots (both literally and metaphorically)

and even if that isn't the case and bison really does have no clue what kant's up to, i still think he's loving the fact that kant is so desperate and eager to win him over. bc ulterior motives or not kant really was sooooo dickmatised by bison. even before chris got on his ass he was telling his bestie abt it like 'i didn't even get his name 🥺️ it's like i slept w a ghost 🥺️ he only exists in my memory 🥺️' like he was down horrendous for bison the moment he got him in that hotel room, and bison KNOWS it. he knows the power he holds over kant, and he loves that shit. he loves that kant ate that shitty burger just to stay on his good side and he loves that kant is so doggedly persistent in trying to be his boyfriend and he loves that when his big brother tried to scare him off kant didn't run or give up but instead asked him 'well how can i get him off our backs?'

and sure we know why. but does it really matter? bison just loves the fact that he can tease kant and not give him what he wants and still kant will just grin and continue to chase him, drooling like a cartoon dog who's just caught scent of a freshly cooked steak. it doesn't really matter why: bison loves power and he loves how eager kant is to give it to him. that's why it's really not that shocking their relationship veers into bdsm territory. kant already seems more than willing to give bison whatever he wants, and what bison really wants is power (and freedom, but we haven't really seen the depth of that particular want just yet). of course kant's going to give him that power, no matter what that looks like.

(but while we're on the topic, i'm really interested to see the dynamics kant and bison adopt the next time they have sex. we know they venture into bdsm territory eventually, but if bison introduces that into their sexual relationship right away (excluding their first time obv) i'm gonna be really side eyeing that little guy bc it's like oh? why are so desperate to be in charge? is it bc you know that guy thinks he's playing you and you wanna see how far he'll go to get what he wants? is it bc the idea of you having this man - this man who thinks he's playing you for a fool - blindfolded and tied to your headboard makes you feel drunk with power? is it bc the idea of hurting this man who's trying to hurt you and him wholeheartedly LETTING you gets you off like nothing else? bc if that really is the case we're reaching unprecedented levels of horny i fear)

anyway this post was just supposed to be a little thing about bison getting off on power i didn't meant for it to turn into a character study/ted talk on his relationship dynamics but here we are lmfao anyway i love bison already i wanna dissect him in a lab <3

[stilljuststardust]

Hello Stardust, I hope you're doing well! I've been debating over this certain thing I've read about LOA (multiple times) so I was wondering if you could help me.

I've seen all kinds of posts from LOA blogs that say that the reason you have to persist is to get your desire in the 3D and that the 3D can be difficult at times, but that you just have to return to the 4D where you already have it and remind yourself that your desire will come in the 3D.

I've also seen posts were it says that you must feel like you already have it and that there is no waiting.

Maybe I'm not understanding it well, but it seems contradicting to me.

Can I know that I have it in the 4D already and that there is no waiting there, but because I can't (and shouldn't) deny what my 3D is (which is normal and fine from what I know about LOA), can I have it in my head that it is coming in the 3D even tho I shouldn't be waiting? I feel like the only thing that I have to know is that the most important thing is the 4D and that it is the real reality and that I have it there already, but when it comes to the 3D I feel like I have no other choice than to be aware of how it is and still hope that it changes, but now, since I am persisting, with much more confidence in that hope/I know that it will change.

From what I think it means-you have to know that the 4D is the real reality and that you already have it in the 4D, but when it comes to the 3D you are aware of how it is, but you know that it will change if you keep persisting and you don't get too uspet by it because you know it is just mirroring the real reality which is the 4D and you already have it in the 4D.

So for example, I'm in school and my classmates are being annyoing, my teachers are being rude and it's like any day before this one which is exactly what I want to get away from with shifting my reality, so when I experience this-in my head I have to know that the 4D is the real reality and that I'm already in my DR and that I will soon be in my DR in the 3D and that this shouldn't bother me that much because soon I won't have to experience it anymore and I just simply have to know that I'm already in my DR (where it matters the most) and that it will come in the 3D. I could also return to my imagination and experience my DR through it (if I need fuel).

Sorry for making this so long, I just wanted to get my point across since this is the only thing left "bothering" me about LOA. I love your posts and you have helped me so much!!! Thank you 💛💛💛💛

Hello! I kinda think "3D/4D" is making it sound more complicated than it is.

Take a deep breath and let go of all the conflicting information for a second. This may be long but that's only because I'm trying to address any possible misconceptions I promise the actual concept isn't convoluted.

When we are speaking practically all it means is that you understand the physical world is not final and is completely changeable by you.

I don't expect you to completely disconnect from your physical body or to somehow be completely unaware of the physical world.

"Ignoring" the 3D does not mean you are magically blind to it it just means you don't mentally contradict your manifestation when you see it.

The 4D is just your internal world (thoughts, visualizations, internal conversations, etc).

Essentially, your subconscious believes anything you're repeating to it. It doesn't know or care if what you're repeating is reflected by the physical world. Its only job is to provide you proof of whatever you're giving to it.

The reason people tell you to fulfill in imagination is because it's supposed to be a way of telling yourself subconscious that it's a fact.

"Ignoring the 3D" is actually just making the conscious choice not to repeat to your subconscious that you don't have what you want because your subconscious will provide more of that.

You don't necessarily have to "feel" anything. Emotion is hard to control, hard to define, and inherently fleeting. Scientifically speaking most positive emotions don't linger very long and negative emotions are much more likely to stick around for longer periods.

You don't need to fuel yourself because it's not about motivation or emotion or drive. It's just consistently repeating to yourself what you want to happen.

Repeat a sentence that implies what you want to happen has happened and don't repeat anything to yourself that implies the opposite.

That is all.

[midnight-mourning]

RESTART

My submission for an angst event, and I'm gunning for the win /j

For real though, had a lot of fun writing this! It's based on my promptober day 29 response, though you don't have to read it to get the jist, hope you enjoy!

Word count: 2,998

☀️🌙☀️🌙☀️🌙☀️🌙☀️🌙☀️🌙☀️🌙☀️🌙

You double check that there's no one around, and sit back down on the box you were previously moping on. In particular, backstage. Sun wasn't likely to look for you here, not liking to leave the Daycare and all that. Though, he had been getting more comfortable with it lately, which meant you'd have to start finding more hiding places. 

You stare down at your hand, you'd come to accept it as that now. It works just like your original, it flexes, bends, grips just the same. It's just pure white, and completely mechanical now. 

The rest of your body functions relatively similar to how it did before, too. At least, you think it does. You'd like to say it's because you've lost track of time since the incident that you can't tell. In reality, you know it's been seven months, 19 days, 21 hours, and 7, 8, 9-god, you still struggle with getting that to quit. 

No, it's just that you've been like this so long, you don't know what it feels like to be human anymore. Your thoughts are still human, that much you're sure of. Sun doesn't think like you do, from what you understand. He doesn't like to talk about it much, he doesn't like to talk about what happened at all, frankly. 

You get it, he feels ashamed, blames himself for it. But still, you don't think it's fair that you can't even acknowledge how much has changed. Your entire life is here now. You can't never leave the Plex, never go home again. You're stuck here, forever, it seems. 

You want to say that you tried harder to find a way to, fix this? move past it? you don't know. But you didn't. You didn't try to contact your friends, your family, anyone. You just, accepted it. What choice did you have? Besides, as far as you knew, nobody seemed to notice you were missing, so you guess it wouldn't have mattered in the first place.

You sigh, and then laugh at the sound. Your voice is hardly still your own, the metallic ring always noticeable to you despite your best efforts to ignore it. 

To Sun's credit, he had tried his best to make this entire ordeal as comfortable for you as possible. 

No Moon, that much had been established. You think he was also afraid of what the naptime attendant was capable of, if he could so effortlessly kill murder destroy harm you, without a second thought. Though, you were surprised to find that Moon did avoid you when the lights went out from time to time-not nearly as often as before, you're still trying to determine how Sun managed that one-not even sparing a passing glance. 

Additionally, you had your own space, in their room, that is. Still, you treasured the area where you could put a bed, books, and other such items that you no longer had a need for-but they helped. They helped. 

And, while reluctant, Sun allowed you time to yourself when you needed it. You could tell that despite all your reassurances, and the amount of time that had passed, he was still concerned about you potentially, having a glitch, as he called it. You called what happened when you first woke up like this a psychotic break, but you digress. 

Regardless, if you weren't running errands, or helping out in the Daycare, you typically chose to be by yourself. Far away from the place. You could tell it upset him, but to be honest, it was hard to be in there 24/7, you don't know how he did it. 

Besides the obvious fact of the matter that you'd died there, it was just too much. He was just too much. 

The music, the noise, kids running around, screaming, crying. Now that you were a bot, they didn't treat you nearly as nicely. You got beat up on, a lot. More than once having to have Sun patch you up or repair you after a long day. 

And Sun. You, at one point, you think you had loved him. Loved Moon. But that had been a long time ago now. Before this. 

And it wasn't even that you couldn't feel the emotion anymore, or hell, even because of what happened. 

You just, you'd grown hollow. Maybe it was because seeing each other all day every single day got to you. Maybe it was because of his constant attempts to get you to engage, doing crafts together, watching movies together, playing games together. Even a few times where you went out in the Plex on these little 'dates' because that's what they were, no need to pretend. 

Maybe that's what it was, all this, pretending. He always just wanted to move on, have everything okay without putting the effort into making it okay. 

You don't know anymore. But what's new?

You lean back against the wall, eyes closing. Even like this, you still have that damn interface pulled up, unavoidable with its synoptics of your system. 

You see there's a notification in your messages. Opening it, you're unsurprised to find it's one from Sun. 

'Starshine! You've been gone for a bit now, everything alright?'

You answer shortly after reading, 'Fine. Just taking some quiet time.

Doing that meditation thing you suggested.' An obvious lie to you, but he buys it. He always does. 

'Oh! I'll leave you be then. I knew it would be just the thing to help :)'

You scoff, opening your eyes and shaking your head. Resentful. You've grown resentful. And that, that makes you feel ashamed more than anything. 

You send back a quick reply, ':)'

It wasn't his fault. You know it wasn't. You called it 'the incident' but you truly don't believe it had been intentional. Though any attempts at an explanation were shut down immediately. And not in the same, nervous way every other similar discussion was. This was a firm 'No' with no exceptions. 

Whatever had happened to Moon to cause him to act that way, it seemed to scare Sun badly enough that he'd even snapped at you one time. 

"Sunshine, I won't tell you again," Sun warns, "We're not talking about it. It doesn't matter. Moon is fine. Okay?" He shakes his head, "He's just, not feeling so well these days. But I have it under control, do you understand?"

You'd been taken aback by his tone. Too, shocked, and honestly a bit frightened, that he'd lashed out at you like that to say anything. 

He sighs, coming over to where you stand. He hesitates to put his hands on your shoulders when you flinch, and instead clasps them in front of him. 

"I don't mean to sound harsh, Love, but it's for the best if we just drop it. Please."

You find yourself nodding, muttering a quiet "Okay."

"I'm sorry," This time he does initiate contact, pulling you into a tight hug. He doesn't tower over you quite as much now, so it's not as awkward as it used to be. 

"You know I love you, right?" He asks in the quiet, voice low. 

You hum, "I know."

He seems to be waiting. If you still could do so, you'd be biting your cheek to steel yourself. 

"I love you too," You say after a moment or so. 

Sun pulls back, and leans down. Your faces touch and there's a brief, soft, static between the two of you until he stops kissing you. 

"I mean it. I love you. More than you know."

Even though you can't return the feeling, you didn't doubt that he meant it. 

The memory replay is interrupted when you hear voices off in the distance.

That was another thing about this new body of yours, all of your senses were heightened to a degree that was borderline uncomfortable.

You double check your location is undetectable-something Bonnie had taught you early on-and listen in. You weren't a snoop, but sometimes you needed help passing the time. And this was one such example. 

"I just don't know what else to do, Freddy," Sun's voice, you'd know it anywhere, "I've tried everything! I don't know what it will take for things to just..."

Freddy's tone is soft, encouraging, "Just what, Sun?"

"Go back to normal? I, I know it can't be like it was, then, before, but, but surely I can get their old self to shine through again, right?"

You realize they're getting closer to your spot. Shit. You need to hide. 

Quickly, you duck behind another stack of crates, pressing yourself snugly behind them. 

Just in time for Freddy's voice to become clearer as they walk backstage, "I'm afraid it's not that simple, my friend. You still haven't told them the full story, have you?"

You peek just slightly out from your hiding spot, able to just see the two bots standing not far from you.

"N-no. But, I'm going to! I swear I will. I just, I need more time," Sun's hands grip his rays, "I have to win them over again first. That way, that way it won't hurt as much."

Freddy seems to want to say something, but doesn't. 

Instead he puts a hand on the taller bot's shoulder and smiles, "I know you'll do the right thing, Sun. Now, I believe Monty has challenged Roxy to an arm wrestling contest, would you like to join?"

"I would! But, I'm afraid I lack the skills nor the strength to participate myself."

They walk off then, chatting happily, but the conversation sticks with you. What did Freddy mean by full story? What did he know that you didn't about your own, demise. 

A message pops up in the corner of your vison. You expect it to be from Sun, inviting you to watch the match. 

It's from Moon.

You're... more than just surprised. You hesitate, but end up opening it. 

'I can tell you the truth.

If you'd like.'

You panic, you swore your location had been off, you know it had. 

You play dumb, '?

What are you talking about?'

'I wasn't with him, I just happened to notice your signal in the system coincidentally at the same time.

He doesn't know you were there, if you're worried about it.'

'How can you do that?'

'Does it matter?

Do you want to know or not?'

'I shouldn't even be talking to you. I don't want to be talking to you.'

'Aw, still upset are we?

I don't blame you, but I think once you have the full picture, that may change.'

You don't answer, sitting back and looking up to the ceiling. You're debating. You want nothing to do with Moon, especially because he doesn't even seem the least bit remorseful, which, hurts more than you'd care to admit, but still. You do want to know what happened. You want the truth. 

And god do you want someone to talk to. Really talk to. About your death, and just in general.

'Fine. Tell me.'

'Not like this. Later. When he's busy.' 

'He's not busy now?'

'When I'm in control.'

'Why? What's that have to do with anything?'

'It's more fun that way.'

Seems despite everything, he's still got that same cheeky personality. 

'Alright. Give me and time and a place and I'll be there.'

Once that's sorted, you exit your hiding space, going to join in the festivities briefly with the other bots. You'd say it was difficult to pretend everything was fine, but that'd just be lying in and of itself. You try to have fun, at least. Afterall, as far as you can tell it's only Sun and Freddy hiding things from you. 

Right?

When the lights go out in the Daycare, Moon doesn't approach you immediately. Instead, he heads out for his usual patrol. About ten minutes later, you receive a message. 

'Catwalks above Monty Golf.'

You take that as your cue, and head that way. Upon arrival, you spy Moon juggling several golf balls to amuse himself. When he sees you he stops, catching them one by one. 

Something stirs in you, and you clap. He seems surprised at this, but bows anyway. The moment takes you back to-you shake your head, everything is different now, and dwelling on the past won't change that. 

"Alright, let's hear it," You keep your distance, leaning against the railing out of his reach. 

You don't think he'd hurt you, but you'd thought that back then, too. 

Moon notices your choice it seems, and chuckles, "I don't bite, Star."

You stay firm, his eyes narrow at this. 

"It's better to show you than it is to say, and for that, you need to come closer."

"And if I don't?" You cross your arms.

He tsks, "Then you won't get the full story. And that's what you want, isn't it?"

You pause. 

"I won't harm you. Not this time. I promise."

You scoff then, "You've made a lot of promises, Moon-man," You curse yourself for letting the nickname slip, "What proof do I have that you'll keep this one?"

"You don't. But he's also made promises, don't you want to know which one's he's kept?"

If you could, you'd be biting your lip right now. 

"He has everything to gain from lying to you. I do not," He holds out his hand, "What's your choice?"

You consider your options, but you'd already made your choice before showing up here. 

You take his offer, hand resting on top of his, "You break this trust, and you'll regret it."

His hand grips yours and you're suddenly spun around and then lowered into a dip, Moon's other hand on your back to secure you.

"I wouldn't dream of it," He leans in, and as he grows closer you swear there's a flash of purple in his optics, "Now hold still, and watch."

Your vison glitches, and you're no longer on the catwalks. Instead, you're standing in the hallway outside the Attendants' room. Inside, you hear an argument occurring. 

Before you can do anything else, a hand rests on your shoulder. You glance up to see Moon. He puts a finger to his smile, then leans over you and cracks the door slightly. 

Inside, you can see Sun pacing back and forth, and another Moon? Sitting on the dresser. One leg swinging back and forth as he watches the fretting playtime attendant. You take note that there's, an air of static around him. Causing a hazy effect around his entire, otherwise relaxed, form. 

"What do we do, what do we do?" He asks, hands gripping his rays, "They're leaving, they're leaving and they're never going to come back."

Other Moon rests his head in his hand, "They just mentioned potentially moving divisions. It's not for certain, and they'd still be around even if that was the case."

"But they want to go, Moonie. They'd rather a different job than working with us. Do they hate us that much?"

A shrug, "I thought the kisses I got the other night proved otherwise, but maybe I'm misinterpreting."

Sun makes a noise of frustration, "You're no help with anything anymore! Ever since you-"

"Ever since what?" Moon growls, and his visage grows darker, the entire room darkening and glitching.

Sun cowers, putting his hands up and things return to normal, "Since you're, upgrade, you've been, less than supportive, to put it plainly."

Another shrug, Sun goes back to pacing. At that moment, other Moon seems to notice you and waves cheekily, but says nothing. 

His counterpart suddenly stops his movement. 

"What if, what if they, couldn't, leave?"

"You're going to make them stay in a job they hate?" Moon tsks, "How selfish, Sunny."

"Yes, but no, I-" Sun hesitates, really, hesitates. 

This piques other Moon's interest, he sits up a bit, "Go on then, I'm on the edge of my seat."

"What if, what if something happened to them, that made it so they had to stay... Forever?"

Moon pauses, then chuckles, "You're not suggesting what I think you are, are you, Sun?"

"It's for the best," Sun argues, seemingly mostly with himself, "They're not thinking straight. This would, this would help. And then, we'd never have to worry about them leaving ever again."

Moon stands, walking over and putting a hand on the playtime attendant's shoulder, "You can't take this back, you know. There's no do-overs, no fixing things. This is final."

"I know," Sun nods, "And you can, take care of it?"

The edges of the room shift again as Moon snickers, "Can't do your own dirty work, Sunny?"

"You say that as if it doesn't benefit both of us," He mutters. 

"It won't. Not for a while. You can't change their memories, they'll know what happened. It's just the cause that will be, murky."

Sun shakes his head, "They'll never know. I'll make certain of it."

"Are you sure about that?" Other Moon asks, and points to the door where you stand, partially visible. 

Sun's eyes widen, and the world around you starts to crumble. 

With a gasp, you find yourself back on the catwalks, stumbling away from Moon. 

You're shaking, and your system starts sending warning signs of an overload. 

You hear a click. 

Looking up, you see that Moon's reached over to a nearby switch, and the light's start to come on one by one. 

"Good luck~" He snickers, bowing one final time as rays start to pop out from his faceplate. 

Sun's face snaps to yours, immediately starting to walk towards you, hands up, "Starlight, you have to listen to me-"

You can't. You won't. And you don't get a further choice in the matter, either. 

In your haste to get away, you stumble back against the railing. And panicking, trip, and tip backwards. Sun reaches out for you, but it's too late, you're falling. You're about to go through so much pain all over again, and all you can think, the only word you can see, is 'LIAR'.

LIAR. LIAR. LIAR.

☀️🌙☀️🌙☀️🌙☀️🌙☀️🌙☀️🌙☀️🌙☀️🌙

Aw, what a fun twist! Oh, but bummer for you though, yikes, sorry about that one :/ Anywho, thanks for reading!

Tag list:

@scarletcowboy @beemyhuneybee @fishm0ther @deviouscrackers @elsajoyagent8

@luckyyyduckyyy @zenkaiankoku @jogimote @local-shrub @eternal-soup (IT WON'T LET ME @ YOU I'M SORRY)

@robinette-green @everlightreader @sinister-sincerely @starredeclipse @dangerva

If you want to be added to the tag list, or check out my other stuff, see this post here for more information, bye!

[purplesaline]

If you think that knowing the punchline of one joke in one episode ruins the entire podcast you're definitely missing the point of the podcast.

The joked like above? They're fun, sure, but they're secondary to the point of the podcast which is the byplay between the two characters/hosts and it's the little lessons about how they're surviving their World Gone Wrong that we can use in our own world gone wrong and make it a little bit better, even if it's just for a couple of people.

But let's be real, I don't think that actually matters to you because I don't think you even care about the fact the little joke for this one episode of this podcast was spoiled. You just wanted something to spark about. See, I've read your reblogs and tags on those posts you've interacted with on my dash and I've noticed this seems to be a pattern with you. You like to shit on things. You like to sit on a high horse and look down on others when they do things differently than the way you think they should be done. You have a very rigid view of how things should be and anyone outside of that seems to be a target of your derision.

And you do you, I guess, but in my experience that makes for a rather lonely sort of life, even when you have plenty of friends. That sort of antagonistic approach to the world certainly left me with a hollow, cold space inside at least. Thankfully it went away when I started being less rigid and judgemental and the world became an even more wonderful place to be.

Take a lesson from that if you want, or not, it doesn't matter to me either way.

What does matter to me, though, is playing any part in someone dimming the light of another person sharing their joy. What you do and the way you act is up to you, but for me that's a boundary I'm very careful about enforcing. Be as snarky as you want on other sorts of posts, but if I see you being an ass on a post I've reblogged where someone is sharing something they enjoy I'm going to soft block you. I won't enable that sort of thing when we need every lumen of joy we can find to survive the years ahead.

For anyone who actually is interested in listening to the podcast, definitely check it out. Knowing this little joke won't spoil the episode, let alone the entire podcast, I promise. It's a bright spot of that joy so many of us are desperate for.

World Gone Wrong is a hilarious and great podcast and i've been meaning on making a proper rec post as for why people should listen. but honestly it's near midnight and i'm just giggling to myself about the gag how one episode is just about how the world has been covered by mysterious restaurants serving mysterious food items that no one seems capable of fully naming, with these food items slowly being found to have infiltrated the menus and freezers of restaurants, institutions, and homes all across the world

and gradually

as it gets explained piece by piece

you realise

it's pizza

leaving you with the realisation that either: a) the entire world forgot about the existence of pizza and was made incapable of perceiving the word "pizza" and is now thinks it's an eldritch foodstuff from beyond mortal ken

b) this world legit didn't have pizza but the universe manifested it, presumably as an apology for all the lycanthropy and fae and alien bodysnatchers and shit

[thefirstlioveyou]

My interpretation of lonnie and will's (+ jonathan's) relationship from what we get from the show:

Lonnie is a neglectful and manipulative father above all, this is what the show tells us. He is a terrible father and person.

Lonnie wants to fix Will and change him. He forces him to play baseball and get into things he doesn't like to make sure he grows up to be a "real man." Joyce knows Lonnie believes he's a queer, a fag. There is no indication that he said it to Will's face, HOWEVER this doesn't make it any less worse. Lonnie still has homophobic opinions about his own son and is trying to "fix" him.

Then we get to the Jonathan and Will scene. Jonathan is trying to distract Will from their parents fighting. When Jonathan brings up Lonnie, Will just seems... Indifferent about him. He doesn't tense up or begin to show fear. He literally asks Jonathan "he isn't coming, is he?" with disappointment. In Billy's childhood memory playing baseball with his father, he literally tells him to leave him alone and runs away. (the parallels are indeed there, but are there to show different situations. billy fears his father because his father is explicitly cruel to him. will is clueless to his father's behavior because his father's cruel intentions are communicated differently through manipulation and control.)

He's indifferent because Will is manipulated by the false hope Lonnie may be giving him. Lonnie does this to Jonathan as well but he sees through it. He knows Lonnie already.

Will is holding onto hope Lonnie may show up more as a father. He wants more time with him. But what he doesn't know is the time Lonnie spends with him, he's actively trying to change him. Will goes with whatever he says because he's young and that's the type of person Will is. He doesn't stand up for himself and goes with whatever is being presented to him.

Jonathan points this out.

He makes Will aware of what Lonnie is actually trying to do. He's making it clear Lonnie isn't trying to be a father to him and spend time with him, he's trying to fix him and make him 'normal.'

Based on Will's body language and choice of words when talking about Lonnie, it seems to me he knows a different Lonnie than Jonathan does. Lonnie would pretend to be someone else to him and mask his true intentions.

Are there implications of physical abuse?

In a way? To me, Lonnie was physically aggressive in a playful but controlling way. In his eyes, it's playing. But he gets to choose when they play with no regard for what Jonathan wants. Lonnie masks it as playful behavior when in reality it's him wanting control and power over someone else. It still hurts Jonathan though. I don't know what to classify this as exactly, but it's wrong It's about the fact there is no consent.

Another example of Lonnie wanting control: Lonnie forces Jonathan to kill an animal with a gun, traumatizing him for a good while, in attempt to make him more of a man. Lonnie gets Will to play baseball to make him more of a man. There is a huge difference obviously, and it could do with their age. Lonnie has a more subtle approach with Will than Jonathan. Will could've eventually been in Jonathan's position if Lonnie had stayed.

From what we are given, between the two siblings, Jonathan was the one that got more shit from Lonnie. It possibly has to do with age and their personalities clashing. Jonathan protected Will from it and made sure Will learnt to not listen to Lonnie at an earlier age than he did.

About the trunk: In my honest opinion, looking back at it, he could have been looking for bags. The more I think about it, it'd just ODD to open a scene with implication he was kidnapped and stuck in the trunk, and not even touch on it and leave it there. Just speaking from a writing perspective. That's a VERY heavy subject to bring in just like that and to treat it like whatever. It's weird to just CASUALLY imply he kidnapped his son like nothing, but the writers want us to actually know Lonnie forces Will to play baseball above anything else. And then just never imply anything else similar to kidnap ever again. It feels off and inconsistent. So I can't fully see the interpretation that Jonathan was looking for Will's body in his trunk. I get why some could come to that conclusion but there's just not enough evidence to support that he would do that.

To me it seems more logical that he believed Will was staying there, especially with the scene between the two. Jonathan sees Will is indifferent to Lonnie. He knows Will's easily manipulated. He plays baseball because that's what Lonnie wants, he'd probably stay at Lonnie's for the same reason.

Will shows no indication of physical abuse unless we're talking about the trauma he has from the UD and possession. Outside of that, he shows more signs he was emotionally abused. This is something we know. We know he's experienced bullying and possibly knows what Lonnie thinks of him, because we know Will can tell when someone think he's different. He's internalized it. The bullying, the UD, and the way people think of him -- it all made him feel like one big mistake.

There are indications of **physical** abuse in other characters in the show and they are quite in your face. From the top of my head, you've got Billy's aggressive behavior, El taking her clothes off in front of the boys, her trauma response from being hid in Mike's closet.

ST and TFS does not hesitate to show us physical abuse on children. They will show us what we need to know. We aren't shown that with Lonnie. The show emphasizes his neglect and need to control/take.

Our first introduction to Lonnie is through Joyce. This is important. They have to tell us exactly what we need to know about Lonnie with little words. And from her description, he sounds like a deadbeat of a homophobic father who is critical over his children. Joyce even says he has nothing to do with it. It doesn't cross her mind that Lonnie could play a role in Will's disappearance because he is an absent father. I think she would have a different mindset if Lonnie was this vicious physical abuser. But no. She sees him as a deadbeat, because that's what he is

When Joyce tells Lonnie to leave after figuring out Lonnie was just there for the money, she goes on a rant on how he was never there. That's what she chooses to bring up. That's what the writers want to emphasize over anything else. His absence. His controlling behavior. His lying and manipulation. This is what makes Lonnie a bad father.

Lonnie is very manipulative, controlling and neglectful. I don't think physically abusive fits in the most. This show in particular will tell you when a father is very physically abusive and bring that to light through several instances (ex: billy's dad). They will show signs a child was physical abused.

Will still struggled in his home. It was a broken home. He wasn't accepted by his father, whether Lonnie made it clear or Will could just tell. His parents fought. Lonnie was never there for him or rarely was. He was abandoned by him. But I do not think Will is fearful of him. I don't think Lonnie is to Will is how Neil is to Billy (Which doesn't make him any less of a bad father! Just different). He's indifferent because Lonnie (from what we can infer) presented himself in a certain/different way to him. Jonathan shows more distaste and anger towards Lonnie because he knows his real intentions.

Now, S5 can obviously introduce something. I bet there is more to Lonnie and the Byers. But this is just how I see it based on everything we're given. Please do not attack me. I am not a fucking Lonnie stan. This is just an analysis.

[canonicallyobserving911]

Eddie Diaz - Season 8A

This post is all about my favorite character Eddie Diaz and HE IS THE MAIN AND ONLY FOCUS OF IT. Therefore, if someone doesn't want to read about how I'm pissed off at the lack of character growth for him, keep scrolling. It's just that simple.

I'm NOT HAPPY about the LACK of development in his storylines and I'm tired of him being put on THE WHEEL OF MISFORTUNE.

I've been quiet long enough about this and I'm tired of the way Eddie Diaz is treated on this show. He's always sidelined and his arcs are pushed back in favor of Buck's which is interesting especially since they're both main characters. Don't get this twisted because I like Buck too but Eddie's my favorite and I would like it if he got the ATTENTION HE DESERVES FOR A CHANGE. Also, guest stars have received more character development than him and that's asinine as hell (Brad and Taylor come to mind).

Before I get started, I'll admit it's unlikely that I'll do a review of 8x8 because like 8x7, there was a lot going on but nothing major happened in it for the mains but they sure did a number on Eddie and regressed him. Therefore, this post is about my favorite character Eddie Diaz since the show and a lot of the fandom treat him like he's a side character. He's a main and I'm f~cking sick of the way his story continues to be sidelined so he can orbit around Buck.

BE CLEAR, I FULLY UNDERSTAND THE IMPLICATIONS OF LAST NIGHT'S EPISODE AND WHAT IT MEANS FOR BUDDIE! I ALREADY KNOW BUCK AND EDDIE WILL BE TOGETHER BUT MY ISSUE IS THE LACK OF DEVELOPMENT FOR EDDIE.

No shade to anyone but I'm not looking for clues that point to Buddie anymore because they've ALWAYS been there and doing that doesn't excite me. I WANT TO SEE REAL CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT and I've been wanting that for all the mains for 7 damn seasons. But the issue is every time Eddie's about to experience some growth, he's regressed back to a point of no return. He takes one step forward and 80,000 steps backward and this is exhausting.

Last night's ending was not for Eddie's benefit, it was done for shock value and for Buck's growth even though Eddie's been haunting Buck's love triangle f~ckery since 7x4. Eddie was ALL ALONE and NO ONE was there for him when he needed to talk. Therefore, Eddie choosing to move back to Texas DID NOT HAVE TO HAPPEN and IMO, it was lazy writing. Do the writers from LS have any idea who Eddie is at all? It sure as hell doesn't seem like it. What happened to the Eddie who said, "I'll always fight to come home to my family?" Or the one who said, "After Shannon died, they wanted me to give Christopher to them but that's not what I wanted then and it's not what I want now." He's practically nonexistent anymore and that's just sad.

Since RG's not leaving the show, what was the point of any of this? Oh, that's right to further Buck's arc while Eddie remains stagnate. Furthermore, TM (showrunner) said Eddie was wearing a mustache and when he shaved it off, he would find out who he is outside of being a father but...

NEWSFLASH!

THOSE TWO THINGS ARE NOT MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE.

The fact is Eddie is a father! He has been since he found out Shannon was pregnant, he always will be and it doesn't matter if he wears a mustache or not and/or whether he lives in L.A., El Paso or Antarctica. Therefore, TM saying that was an oxymoronic statement because since Eddie is a father whatever decision he makes will and should be for the benefit of him and his son. That's been one of the main issues for him since he's used Chris as a shield for his own heart while ignoring what he wants. Him deciding to return to Texas IS NOT doing what's best for either of them.

Additionally, for the entirety of 8A, all he was shown doing was being a dad. He spent all that time in 8x4 trying to help Mike reconnect with Weston but NOT ONCE did we see Eddie going above and beyond to visit Chris. It's like the showrunner put more effort into that than Eddie's on storyline and it's ridiculous. So, it doesn't matter if Eddie's married to Shannon (I know she's deceased but I'm making a point) or if he dates Ana, Marisol or Buck, HE WILL ALWAYS BE CHRIS' FATHER! THAT'S NEVER GOING TO CHANGE and whatever decisions he makes, until Chris becomes an adult, it always will be true.

Be clear, Eddie choosing to move back to Texas is NOT HIM CHOOSING JOY, it's him regressing and doing the same things he did in previous seasons. In season 5, instead of talking to Chris about how he was feeling, he up and quit the 118 but HE WAS MISERABLE because he didn't want to leave. Granted he needed the break and he also needed to go to therapy but since that time, it's been nothing but crickets on the therapy front for him. When he finally did talk to his son, Chris SAID HE DIDN'T TELL EDDIE TO QUIT. So, why wasn't he allowed to talk to Chris this time and ask him what he wanted? Or better yet why aren't they doing family therapy or something? Chris is talking to him now but we didn't get to see how they got there from 8x1. It all happened off-screen and the last time Eddie said something about Helena was 8x5 so he's been out of the loop on his own child for weeks.

Chris is a child which means Eddie has the final say. His parents don't have any legal rights to Chris but NOT ONCE has Eddie been allowed to tell them about the legal guardianship. After he told Buck about it, it's never been mentioned again and I don't want Eddie to have an NDE for Chris to come back and I don't want Buck to have that conversation with Helena and Ramon. It's good for fanfic writing (I've written several with the narrative) but in real life it gets messy and it's possible Chris doesn't even know Buck's his guardian.

This situation is a cluster f~ck of epic proportions and it needs to be resolved like NOW. It's been more than 5 years since Eddie changed his will and they haven't talked about it.

Another issue is Eddie IS ALWAYS TOLD WHAT TO DO and the one or two times he's made a decision on his own, he was happy about it but it was short lived since the showrunner always regresses him back into the Terror Dome. His dad told him to be the man of the house at 10 years old, they and those busybodies at church told him to marry Shannon because she was pregnant, he went to the Army and all they did was tell him what to do (it's the military so that's what they do) and when he was honorably discharged Shannon tried to tell him to move to California. Then his parents tried to coerce him into leaving Chris with them when he applied to work at the LAFD and Helena told him to move back to El Paso after Shannon died. His parents and Bobby told him it was time to move on from his dead wife in season 4 so he dated Ana. Buck told him to break up with her in season 5 and he did. Pepa told him he needed to put himself back out there in season 6 and she pressured him into going on a blind date with Vanessa. In season 7, Bobby asked him about the time he was married and his commitment issues, Father Brian had to tell him to find joy and Brad had to tell him not to let the gap widen in his relationship with his son. Also, instead of talking to his raggedy parents, he's making another decision that he won't be happy with. He'll be miserable because it's not what he wants. He established a whole life for him and Chris in L.A. and instead of fighting for it and telling his parents to get the hell on, he's surrendering.

That's not the Eddie Diaz from previous seasons. Seasons 2, 3 and 4 Eddie didn't want his parents raising his son. What happened to him? Where is he? He's missing and he has been for a while. I need him to come back and stand up to his parents. I'm sure there won't be a good resolution to this storyline and it's unlikely that Eddie will tell his parents off especially since the show is handing out undeserved and unearned parent redemption arcs like they're lollipops or some shit.

Eddie has A MOUNTAIN of things he needs to work through like his grief over Shannon dying, that whack ass doppelgänger Kim, his inability to tell his parents where to go, addressing the issues that are in front of him and all the pain and grief he's been carrying around for years regarding his failed marriage. He needs to have an open and honest conversation with Chris about Shannon and instead of asking Buck to talk to him in 7x1, he should have done it.

What I want to see is Eddie choose Eddie for a change instead of this hamster wheel of doom he's constantly being put on. Seeing him dance around in his underwear was cute and nice but that's not growth. He did something that brought him joy but the only reason he did it was because the priest told him to. When is he going to do something for himself? When will Eddie Diaz decide that's enough of this shit and tell himself he deserves better? He deserves to be happy just like everyone else and it's time for Eddie's FULL STORY TO BE TOLD.

I'm tired of waiting and I'm sure there will be some who'll read this post and say, "The second half of the season is supposed to be Eddie's." LOL 🤪. Haven't we been here before? Like five times actually and three of them were due to the F*X network's interference. Eddie's arc keeps getting delayed and it's possible there will be something else that causes TM to delay it again.

The fact is there is something else that could hinder Eddie's growth and the path to Buddie CANON but since I don't talk politics on my blog, I'll just say IYKYK and January is only 9 weeks away. This should have happened in season 7 but TM delayed it yet again so he can write it the way he wants to and if he keeps on, he might not get the chance.

Eddie and Buck both need to show growth because there are two people in the Buddie ship. It's unfair for Eddie to be sidelined while Buck gets to date and do whatever the f~ck he wants while Eddie sits at home and blows up his life yet again. I don't want Eddie to have another mental breakdown, an NDE or anything else that will cause him to be in the hospital or have him struggling. I want to see him go back to therapy so he can finally unpack all the shit from his childhood and his young adult life. Change takes work and him dancing around in his "tighty whites" like Tom Cruise is not the same thing.

Where is the consistency and the continuity?

Hopefully, 8B will happen without any hiccups so Eddie can finally be happy.

[theshadowsingersraven]

I'm just going to explain something real quick because the inability to grasp this is very amusing to me. I want to break down exactly how it is that a character can be toxic in one relationship, but not another.

Let's make some characters. We'll call them Character A, B, C, and D. Character A has trauma surrounding love/feeling like they're worthy of love and struggles with self-image. Character A pined over someone long-term in an unhealthy, one-sided dynamic, likely due to their own unconscious self-sabotage and tendencies to set impossible standards for themselves.

Character A is drawn to Character C, and the feeling is mutual. They might want to pursue a relationship. Character C is in an arranged marriage with Character D, and by all accounts, Character D has done their absolute best to do right by Character C. Even if Character C doesn't seem interested in making the relationship work currently, there's still reason to believe that might change. After all, there's plenty of circumstances that could bring them together and give Character C a chance to see aspects of Character D that they never considered before.

So, given Character A's struggle with believing they're worthy of love, even if they decide to be in a relationship with Character C, and Character C doesn't pursue things with Character D...wouldn't it make sense for Character A to feel at least a little unnerved by Character C's arranged marriage? It's not currently possible to get a divorce, so Character D is still somewhat present. Character D is often away, but Character A and Character D work for the same overall organization, though not in the same branch.

It would be reasonable to suspect or even actively anticipate that this could trigger Character A's trauma and insecurities because of this obstacle unique to Character C's circumstances. Of course, Character A still needs to do the work on their own time to unpack their trauma, but it's probably easier to do without a constant, underlying sense of unease that they could be left for Character D.

It's harder to heal when you're in a dynamic that actively aggravates your specific wounds, even if it's not any specific Character's fault. Character A might doubt their self-worth more, and that could make Character C feel frustrated or suffocated because they might be in a position where they have to spend more time reassuring Character A that they won't leave them for Character D instead of actively being together.

It's even harder when the other characters around Character A and Character C are surrounded by two other couples in arranged marriages that made it work. In fact, the party responsible for arranging these marriages has a pretty solid record of making good arrangements, though there's definitely been some bad reviews and bad experiences. So, there's even more reason for Character A to suspect that Character C will leave them.

Character A doesn't really have particularly good coping mechanisms either. Character A works themselves to death, and might even avoid Character C out of fear of getting attached to something doomed to fail. Character C might be hurt by this. Or, Character A might do the converse and work extra hard to make sure Character C is happy enough not to leave them for Character D. And that's probably exhausting in and of itself, but what about Character C? What if they start to feel suffocated or like they don't have the space they need for their own independence because of Character's A trauma being triggered by their specific circumstances?

It sounds like there's a lot of potential for toxicity between Character A and Character C, but not something necessarily inherent to their specific persons. It's a circumstancial issue.

So, if we look at Character B, who might be a romance interest for Character A, that aggravating factor doesn't exist. There's no threat that triggers Character A. So, Character A isn't unnerved, nor is Character B suffocated or having to reassure Character A that their fears won't come to fruition. Instead, Character A can focus on healing their trauma, and Character B can support them while on their own healing journey, too.

I'm sure plenty of people already understand this to be the case, but for those who didn't before--congratulations! You now understand why Azriel is, in fact, potentially toxic in a relationship with Elain but not with Gwyn.

And that's what you missed on Glee.

[miriani-lavellan]

It sounds to me like the way Zara starts saying 'Amatus,' her tone of voice and her expression, that she really is in love with Illario. But having said that, I have no doubt that if she bored of him, or had any inkling she was being used, she would have done to Illario what she did to Lucanis. In fact, I think that sooner or later, she would have wanted to bind Illario to her more permanently. To make him 'more,' to have him entirely enslaved.

And Illario would have been the perfect vessel for an envy demon.

It's probably one of the reasons that Lucanis seems more frustrated at him than truly vengeful - Illario is a spoilt, jealous, immature man who took the entire opposite from Caterina's training than Lucanis did. He was always more in danger than Lucanis was, a hair's breadth away from a fate that nobody deserves.

It's a testament to his ability to charm and captivate that he doesn't end up that way almost immediately. And that's part of the tragedy - Illario is very capable, very skilled. But a lifetime of being compared to the golden child has, essentially, fucked him up.

Illario has probably been thinking about ways to remove Lucanis from the board for a long time, perhaps only holding back out of fondness, out a of a sense of familial affection. But then he meets Zara, who cultivates Envy, who knows exactly how to draw out that emotion, to play with it and shape it to her desires. Who has manipulated with it for so long it's probably second nature to her.

Illario is not innocent in any sense of the word. But I think his early encounters with Zara, however they happened, certainly helped to unlock something that would be detrimental to everyone around them. Something that, when he's back in Treviso and out from under her cloud, suddenly starts to make him realise how entirely stupid he's been. His grief at Lucanis's 'death,' I think, is real. And so he scrambles, to cover up his crimes, and to salvage anything he can from the mess he created, using Lucanis's new reality as justification for it.

So, when I played Lucanis’s questline for the first time, I genuinely thought that Illario was going to turn out to also be possessed. I like to try to come up with theories if there's some kind of mystery involved. Obviously, Illario is suspicious from the get-go but if you want to give him the benefit of the doubt you can, after all, grief really does make people act strangely, but not usually immediately after the death. But when he shows up after the defeat of Zara and kills her just as she says “Amatus” upon seeing him there's no doubt he was in cahoots with her. But then something interesting happens, he uses blood magic, some enchanted pin. He still keeps up the act of innocence though. We get further confirmation during the questioning of Zara’s corpse that the two were extremely close, at least from her perspective. But then we get a strange little tidbit from the memories of Lucanis later in his quest line when you're with spite. Lucanis has a memory or maybe it's some warped memory of Zara talking about the cultivation of an Envy demon. 

Zara’s project was to cultivate and bind different types of demons more easily through new techniques. Zara was talented enough to be able to put a demon inside of a non-mage subject, something that shouldn't be possible in the first place, or at least unheard of. She also wanted to cultivate certain types of demons, ones that are more rare and possibly harder to bind. We see the results of most of her test subjects, either walking corpses or bound demons. Let's say she agrees to take Lucanis to be a test subject, thinking the whole thing would just kill him and the terms of her deal with Illario would be met. Let's say shes surprised Lucanis is even able to merge with spite, let alone survive well afterward. Now let's say this gets her thinking, can she replicate this? Can she put demons and spirits into non-mages? Was this a freak accident?

I know I’m speculating a lot here but hang with me. Now I don't know if her scheme is to take advantage of Illarios jealousy and use it to create an envy demon, something rare and hard to bind, but it would naturally be attracted to that much envy in a person. Or maybe it's presented as an opportunity later down the line, that Illario could become an abomination and gain as much power as one, being able to tap into magic even if not in full control would still give him an edge. I don't know, I just think there was a bit more to the story that we don't know about, aside from what we’ve seen in some of the concept art. Which shows something akin to Illario being manipulated by either Zara or some kind of desire demon or??? Just someone in a pool of blood, with horns? But pieces of these ideas got left behind in the game. Fragments of something larger and it drives me up the wall. 

There's an obvious romantic connection between Illario and Zara that is never elaborated upon in conversation, It is a deeply interesting tidbit of information and nothing is done with it. Then there's Zara’s line in Lucanis’ memories of her saying that the conditions of cultivating an envy demon must be perfect (the line that sent me through this spiral). And then there is Lucanis’ log book. His 5th one if you don't save Treviso shares a reading list of books and he writes some notes with his thoughts about each. He says that Spite “trusts nothing to do with envy demons” which to be fair to spite, is reasonable they're… creepy, and envy as an emotion is a huge liar sometimes. 

There's just something there. Obviously, the story got cut up and changed with time but there was a time when I started to think that the reason Illario is so suspicious is that he's a red herring, or he's a patsy, or not in control of himself or being manipulated or SOMETHING. But no he's just… kinda stupid. He locked up his grandmother and kept her alive? IS HE STUPID?

Anyway, I just like the idea of some grander conspiracy or grander narrative and that maybe Illario wasn't all to blame for everything or that he was, and he was actually even more villainous. Being controlled by his own jealousy to the point of madness blah blah blah you see why I’m thinking about this so much now yeah?

[rat-rosemary]

No one's falling for edited screenshots. Everyone believes it because of Karl's mods. They tweeted out hearts and liked replies and not a single one has denied them, even the mods who are literally in the screenies.

If it's fake then Karl's entire mod team would have to be in on it.

I'll be honest, that doesn't make it seem less fake. That seems like the mods are fucking around and laughing because the thread is literally so absurd

And considering they're Karl "i will kill you entire family hehe" Jacobs mods Im not that surprised thats whag they're doing

[kookies2000]

Blue Sky Never Dies

Just found this in Nimona. Give me a moment.

[supersecretnerd]

Ok so these designs are cute as hell, the Internet is just mean

I have too many thoughts about a game I still need to watch

[whumpitisthen]

Actually talking about dreams reminded me that i had a dream with Grim before he even had a name or was even a character of mine!! I can't believe i forgot about that the only reason i even know about it is bc i found some old text messages where i talked about it and it must have been such a defining moment i decided i must share it with someone at 03:40 am

Reporting from the future, according to past me: "the god of death visited me in my dream" and "he was very fun" and "he sang to me in latin". I also thought it was an omen but wasn't sure if it was a good or bad one. I also said "hes a trickster ofc hed love to visit you and scare you" (to friend i was messaging). Thats literally just Grim. Like all of this fits him except he looks a little different today; like his hair isn't pale blond its just white, and his eyes aren't dark but red, but i guess. They can be dark. At the same time. He visited me before he even existed and that's a little freaky tbh i hope he visits again soon

This does help answer a question thats been bothering me since the parley happened which is what language do him and his majesty speak? And auden for that matter. Bc ofc i write in English but other languages do exist still, and both grim and the lord speak most languages (so the interpreters weren't even rly needed with the humans) but that doesn't mean they just speak english bc i write in english bc that seems unfitting to me.. now ive decided they just speak latin in reality. Or some other form of lost language no one else speaks. That or if they are speaking to someone else, then they speak the language the person they are talking to speaks. Same with the Doctor actually, since it "talks" in people's thoughts, and whatever it says is interpreted in a way unique to each individual, so if its communicating with a Spanish speaking person for example then that person would hear its words in spanish bc thats what they understand and thats the filter their brain interprets things through. But it doesn't rly talk it just kinda beams its own thoughts into people, so it technically speaks all languages, but also doesn't speak any.

[queerpyracy]

"op i get what you're saying but--" blocked. nobody asked

[wild-at-mind]

If you ever see me becoming one of those transmisandry people, please fucking call me out immediately.