#but the creep factor gets worse every re-watch

[prefer-to-be-vilified]

See? We aren’t so different 🖤🖤🖤

[jeanandthedreamofhorses]

You're into ASOIAF too? Oh wow. You certainly made the right call dropping this shitshow -and yeah, looking back, I didn't think it possible to have a worse season than S5 but hooo boy, was I wrong-. Knowing its abomination of an ending now, I'm trying hard not to let it ruin the books for me, too, so take this as a cautionary tale, lol. And bc some positivity would be nice and I do always enjoy reading your opinions, if it's okay, could I ask you about your fave ASOIAF characters and such? thx!

Frick yeah, the question I’ve been waiting for! I can gush about pretty much every character since they’re all so amazingly well written, but for a brief list of the top contenders… (TWOW spoilers ahead!) 

5. Asha Greyjoy

“If there are rocks to starboard and a storm to port, a wise captain steers a third course.”

Irreverent, cynical, mocking, confident and dangerous, what’s not to love about Asha? She immediately made an impact with such scenes as her “sweet suckling babe” quip and was one of my favourite side characters in ACOK.

AFFC, however, was when she really got to shine, where to my elation she got a POV chapter, and more in ADWD. Despite her seemingly Ironborn-to-the-core personality, we discover she’s actually one of the least zealous of the Ironborn, sympathetic to the New Ways and those influenced by the culture of the ‘greenlanders’ like Rodrik the Reader. As one of the few reading Ironborn, she’s clearly one of the most intelligent of the Ironborn and certainly more open-minded, which leads to her down-to-earth sales pitch for the Kingsmoot, a sensible, realistic policy which would be genuinely best for her people - while still, of course, maintaining some elements of conquest: she is the kraken’s daughter, after all.

This side to her personality that sympathises with the fringe elements of her society and is able to make realistic assessments of the possibilities of success comes largely from the difficult position of being a prominent woman in the hypermasculine, heavily patriarchal Ironborn culture. Being raised as Balon’s substitute son has landed her more freedom than most Iron women, but in a complicated position nonetheless. She manages to handle it to the best of her ability, however with Balon gone she comes to realise just how precarious her position always was.

Now, like many other characters in ADWD, she is dealing with the hardship of broken dreams. Disaster piles upon disaster for Asha, from the failed kingsmoot to the loss of Deepwood Motte to becoming captive to Stannis (a dynamic I can’t wait to see more of btw, what an interesting clash of personalities!). Like Tyrion, her bravado serves to mask her insecurity, and her sense of powerlessness from recent events - both in commanding her own destiny and the heartache from the ruinous state of her family - really comes out in her inner monologue during ADWD.

How fitting, then, that this is when she reunites with Theon, another character whose lofty ambitions were torn brutally to the ground. Asha lorded it over him in Winterfell, but perhaps now she can relate. Mock as she may, Asha genuinely loves her family, and it’s another appealing aspect of this lonely character navigating her way through her unusual existence on the tightrope of social norms.

4. Tyrion Lannister

“You poor stupid blind crippled fool. Must I spell out every little thing for you? Very well. Cersei is a lying whore, she’s been fucking Lancel and Osmund Kettleblack and probably Moon Boy for all I know. And I am the monster they all say I am. Yes, I killed your vile son.”

Everyone loves Tyrion, and how can they not? He’s one of the wittiest and most intelligent characters in the series, and the first stumbling block when it comes to which side we should root for. While he was always one of my favourite characters from the start, factoring in his complex family life and struggles on account of his dwarfism (and later the maiming of his already ugly face), my favourite part of Tyrion as a character is how all the things we love about him are flipped on their head in ADWD.

Tyrion tells us in AGOT to wear your shame like “armor and it can never be used to hurt you”. It’s an empowering statement, but throughout ASOS we see how insecure Tyrion still is inside, and his ignoble treatment at the hands of his father and the people as a whole in the kangaroo court for Joffrey’s murder, can, ultimately, be boiled down to his being a dwarf. His armour fails him, and he is still utterly unable to be loved, appreciated, or respected by anyone. Only by Tysha, as he finds out, who is now lost to him - ripped from his hands by the machinations of his father and the one family member that Tyrion still loved, his brother.

It’s at this point that Tyrion is never the same again. He murders Shae in cold blood, and he murders his father, and he regrets none of it. He is becoming the monster they said he was.

When we see him in ADWD, the dark side of Tyrion that had always been hidden behind the hope he had clung onto creeps all too shockingly for the surface. His jokes are now too cynical to laugh at, dark and disturbing and cruel. He uses his intellect for no greater good beyond his own personal amusement, deliberately influencing Young Griff to attack Westeros prematurely just in the hopes that his sister might get the axe. He is on no side but his own, acting brazenly irresponsibly as he has no interest in the grand schemes others have set out for him, or even in his own life. The chips on his shoulder are now genuine murderous intent, daydreaming about raping and killing Cersei and mounting Jaime’s head on a spike next to her. Where Tyrion’s whoring habits had seemed roguish and humorous before, in Essos he is depicted raping clearly reluctant sex slaves.

What makes this all the more disturbing, and all the more literarily brilliant, is that it casts aside the biased curtain we had seen Tyrion through before, and the result is shocking. How much more free to consent is a Westerosi prostitute than a Pentoshi sex slave? How worthwhile were the barbed comments he made so frequently when they ultimately led to a litany of testimonies against him as soon as he lost his privileged position? The worse devils of Tyrion’s nature come out in full force, and we see much more of the black of the character Martin described as “the grayest of the gray”. Perhaps the difference now is that Tyrion’s POV lacks a single element of self-love. The readers are repulsed by him in the same way he repulses himself.

Nonetheless, Tyrion seems to be rekindling something of a purpose in ADWD, as characters nurture themselves back up from the wreckage in the aftermath of the War of the Five Kings. He has lost the Lannister’s golden influence, but his silver tongue still serves him well. However, we may never see the old Tyrion again. This Tyrion has not repented for the vile things he has done, or the vile things he intends to do. He was caricatured by the citizens of King’s Landing as an evil advisor whispering into the monarch’s ear - this may become something closer to the truth when he at last meets with Daenerys.

3. Jaime Lannister

“Does my lord wish to answer?” The maester asked, after a long silence. A snowflake landed on the letter. As it melted, the ink began to blur. Jaime rolled the parchment up again, as tight as one hand would allow, and handed it to Peck. “No,” he said. “Put this in the fire.”

Who saw a Jaime POV coming? What an incredible way to open ASOS after the prologue, to see things from the eyes of one of the series’ most notorious villains. I don’t think I need to explain at length how impactful it was to gently peel off the layers of Jaime’s character, revealing the true reason he killed Aerys, his growth in his interactions with Brienne, the embodiment of the chivalric values he abandoned, and most significantly, losing the hand that was his entire identity and vanity. Anyone who has read the book or watched the show can relate.

Since then, he continues to fascinate. He is discovering talents beyond swordsmanship, entering into a negotiation even Tywin could have been proud of. He has learned how to use his bad reputation for nobler ends, scaring Edmure Tully silly enough to end the siege of Riverrun without shedding a single drop of blood. He is still fighting for a Lannister king, true, but that is only staying true to his role as Kingsguard: now that he has lost his sword hand, he is discovering what it means to be a knight again, in an unconventional and thrilling way.

I chose the above quote because it captures the beauty of AFFC Jaime, breaking away from the sister he fought so hard to return to and decisively cutting out her influence for good. In Jaime’s reverse knight’s fable, refusing the call of the damsel in distress is one of the most upright things he has ever done. How fitting that he should then meet up with the woman who influenced him to take the other path - only she seems about to betray him, too…

It will be so interesting to see Stoneheart’s perverted justice on a character whose head we once wanted on a chopping block but now want to survive at all costs. I don’t think Brienne will be able to follow through with it to the end. After all, Jaime must live on to fulfil a certain prophecy…

2. Euron Greyjoy

“The bleeding star bespoke the end,” he said to Aeron. “These are the last days, when the world shall be broken and remade. A new god shall be born from the graves and charnel pits.”

It’s common enough to hear writers and critics talk about how your villain can’t simply be evil, and that they need to have sympathetic motivations or else they’re badly written. I think that’s true sometimes, but only when your evil villains fail to capture the raw horror of what evil really is - that’s when they feel wooden or cartoonish. To successfully capture that heart of darkness, however…

That is what George R.R. Martin achieved with Euron Greyjoy, the most terrifying character I have ever read.

Everyone underestimates Euron. They know he’s mad, but they don’t know how mad he is. They think they can outmanoeuvre him, like Asha, or betray him, like Victarion. They think he’s lying when he says he’s sailed to Valyria and means to conquer Westeros with dragons. Only Aeron knew. Only Aeron knew the depths of Euron’s depravity, and how far he means to fly. Because he’s the only one who heard the scream of the rusted iron hinge.

The Forsaken showed that it was all true, that Aeron was right all along - that he, like the oracle Cassandra, warned the Ironborn but was condemned to be ignored. Euron has an ambition unparalleled by any other character in the series - he means to turn himself into a god. He’s the only one depraved enough to go to the lengths it would take to make that dream a reality.

We should fear Euron, we should fear him very much. And yet, I think his dreams of godhood can never fully come to pass. He is, after all, still a man - still fallible, as we saw him shrink away at the Reader’s reprimand in The Reaver and change his tactics accordingly. His humanity will be the death of him - not any goodness in his heart, but a weakness common to the human creature. The dragons he means to dance with, and potentially the Others too as some theories go, will move at a pace beyond those mortal legs.

His attempt to fly will inevitably end with a fall. But that headfirst plunge will take the Seven Kingdoms with him.

1. Stannis Baratheon

“I know the cost! Last night, gazing into that hearth, I saw things in the flames as well. I saw a king, a crown of fire on his brows, burning… burning, Davos. His own crown consumed his flesh and turned him into ash. Do you think I need Melisandre to tell me what that means? Or you?“

Here is a man so totally dedicated to his duty that he is willing to do whatever it takes to accomplish it, even if it means his own destruction.

He is a character that believes in justice and the word of law more strongly than any other, and watching his dogged persistence to put a corrupt world to rights no matter the odds has always struck a chord with me, especially in this world teeming with such selfish and barbarous characters.

He is not such a performer as other characters, not as openly humorous as Tyrion (though lowkey he has an incredible dry wit), nor as pretty as Renly, nor as lighthearted as Littlefinger. He’s a dour person, hard and unpopular. But if you listen to the conversations he has with Davos, there is an incredible heart to this man who has placed all the troubles of the world on his own shoulders, and strives through cold and stormy weather to make the best, most just decision he can for no other reason than that - because it is just. Justice is hard, sharp and unyielding, not pretty, not humorous, not lighthearted - but necessary. In a king more than anywhere else. That’s why those who do follow Stannis, like Davos, follow him with such faith and loyalty.

He often proceeds about this goal in questionable ways, compensating for the imperfections of his forces and of his own personality. This is the rickety bridge Stannis walks on, as a man who will go to any means necessary to accomplish what he feels must be done. Sometimes this might mean unleashing dark forces better left locked up, sometimes it might mean committing so terrible a sin as kinslaying, sometimes it might mean sacrificing a child to awaken stone dragons - and sometimes it will mean rescuing the realm from a wildling incursion when no other king cared.

Moments like that unforgettable “STANNIS! STANNIS! STANNIS” stick so powerfully in my memory because, much like Jaime, the real virtue of this character had yet to shine so brightly as it eventually would in ASOS. Something which had always been there takes us unawares. And he is evolving, too, ever becoming more flexible, more willing to compromise, more hesitant to burnings, more dedicated to the good of the realm over himself.

And there is a whole other layer of tragic pathos that lies behind his character. Try as hard as Stannis might, and God does he try, he is not Azor Ahai, and every reader knows he will not sit the throne at the end. Even Stannis knows where this road will leave him. But he persists anyway, in the face of death. The courage of that, the self-sacrifice - how can one not be moved by it?

One of the finer points of Stannis that often goes missed in (understandably) overzealous attempts to correct the show’s butchering of his character, is that there is a part of him that does want to be king. He’s lived in Robert’s shadow his entire life, as Asha thinks to herself in ADWD, and there is a part of him that does yearn for recognition. Quotes like “Robert could piss in a cup and men would call it wine, but I offer them cold clear water and they squint in suspicion and mutter to each other about how queer it tastes.” reveal that, I think.

So this is a whole other internal battle within Stannis - he must be careful not to allow his judgement to falter against the part of him that is jealous of Robert, of Renly, that wants to be the hero Melisandre says he is. This very human aspect complicates further the already complicated war between deontological and utilitarian ethics that wages in his head, with Davos and Melisandre as their respective spokesmen. Much as he may want to be a perfect king and avatar of justice - he is still human.

The depth and tragedy of Stannis Baratheon is Shakespearean. My heart shatters in advance for the moment Stannis has made his greatest sacrifice of all to halt the advance of the Others (not the Boltons, he’ll flatten them like pancakes), and for it to do nothing, nothing at all. For him to realise he was never the hero of this story, and that now he has gathered all this blood on his hands where there is no spring to wash them in.

A man so just as Stannis could never forgive himself. But we, the readers, shall never forget the battles he fought as an axle of this universe striving to be something greater.

Honourable Mentions to Aeron, Victarion, Barristan, Jon (Snow and Connington), Cersei and Brienne. Yes, I really like the Greyjoys 🦑.

[binkywinky]

given how strong she is, what would you say are the ways they could actually challenge carol in the mcu? does she have any weaknesses?

Hmm. Well, I’m not sure what they’re planning to do with her in the MCU, but I can give my answer based on Carol in the comics.

Stronger Opponent. There’s the obvious answer of someone just being more powerful than her, but they would need to be a lot more powerful. Carol’s true strength, IMO, is in the diversity of her skills, not her powers. She’s incredibly strong, can shoot energy blasts, can absorb energy to the point of going binary (the movies barely touched on this - you should look up what her true binary powers are), has an impressive healing factor and durability, can fly extremely fast, is skilled at hand-to-hand combat, etc. Current MCU characters tend to be specialized at one or a few things - Carol’s skills are a lot more diverse, which is what makes her so formidable. There of course exist characters in the comics who can take her on, but they haven’t really been introduced in the MCU yet. 

Magic. That’s the one type of energy Carol can’t really absorb too well. If her opponent uses magic, it can put her at a significant disadvantage.

Mind Shenanigans. Carol has a long, long history of people fucking with her mind (up to and including losing her memories multiple times). She’s always been susceptible to mental manipulation, so I think having a villain with that ability would definitely be a challenge.

The above are from a powers v. powers standpoint. She also has weaknesses outside of that that also are her strengths.

Risk-taking. Carol is quick to take action. It’s a weakness because she’s willing to do something risky for the sake of taking action. But it’s a strength because she takes action when needed, regardless of how risky it may be (re: Endgame where she’s the one who’s like “Let’s get the stones and fuck Thanos up. Now.” while everyone else just watches the monitors). She doesn’t do the thing where you mull it over for hours and try to figure out if everything will go perfectly - she just takes action, accepts the consequences, and keeps moving. It’s a big part of what makes her a good leader.

Pride and Doggedness. Carol is very confident in herself, which is fine, until someone she dislikes claims they’re better than her or, worse, bets her that she can’t do something. And because she’s Carol, she’ll accept that challenge, even though she clearly understands it’s a bad idea - she just can’t help herself. And because she won’t ever back down, she’ll just keep going and fighting no matter what. Those are the moments when her persistence and confidence become a problem. Now, eventually, she realizes this isn’t the way to do things and will go about it intelligently, but it takes her a minute to get there. She’s gotten a lot better about it over the years, but it still creeps up every now and then.

[scrawnsenior]

Donington Park Ducati Cup Rd3

The national circuit at Donington isn’t unknown territory for me. I’ve been there every year since 2012 when I started racing with NG Road Racing. I’ve won there, crashed there and everything else in between. 

The BSB powers that be decided that the shorter circuit at Donington would be a good enough replacement for Brands Indy. I’m inclined to agree. The slightly longer lap, by 15 seconds or so, seems to suit most. I certainly enjoy it. 

The weekend started on Friday with free practice and as I’d been there two weekends prior to the BSB I was set-up and on (my) pace straight away. I have mentioned before about setting goals for a race weekend and I wanted to achieve a 1:11 lap time and score some points. I finished FP with a 1:13 on old tyres so was happy enough. Thankfully I had no issues with the #22 bike because the technicians were busy with my teammate’s bike after he had a little off. I mention it because it would have repercussions in qualifying for myself. 

Having worked all day to get my teammate’s bike turned around we rolled out for qualifying. Whilst sat waiting at the end of pit lane he mentioned to me that his bike temp had just jumped dramatically. Having been on the receiving end of a bike dumping water onto my own back wheel I urged caution if he saw the temp creeping up. 

Leaving pit lane I was determined to get a good lap in and qualify well so tried to get going straight away. Within two laps Salty, my teammate, had caught me. He passed me going into the Roberts chicane and on the exit I saw water come out of his belly pan. I knew straight away his bike was overheating. I was torn between trying to pass to let him know and staying well away for fear of getting caught up in either a crash or going down on his fluid. I found myself cringing every time he tipped into a corner as I genuinely felt he was going to crash. The marshals had seen it too and little did I know the radio traffic was communicating that a black and orange flag should be deployed to get the offending machine of track. After following Salty for a few laps I made the call to come in and get IN put on his pit board. Race control had beat me to it and I saw the meatball flag at Coppice with my number on it. 

I knew immediately what had happened. I had been confused for the #61 bike and as I rolled down pit lane I was stopped and told my bike was smoking. It wasn’t but I had to go to technical regardless. I insisted that the officials at least flagged Salty too as I knew it was his bike that was spewing fluid out. Following nearly six minutes in pit lane for myself, Salty finally pulled over at Mcleans and I was allowed to resume my session. I never really got going again due to cooled tyres and a bit of traffic and my last lap was my quickest. Only good enough to qualify 19th. At least nobody went down but there was clearly more work on for the team to sort the #61 bike for Race one the following day. Turned out that the water pump had failed but thankfully someone had one in the paddock. It got replaced and he got out for the race, only to crash again and end his weekend completely. 

My weekend also got worse before it got better. Admittedly not as bad as Salty so mustn’t grumble. 

As I headed out for Race one on Saturday I knew I had some work to do if I was to score points. Passing the marshals at the end of pit lane I saw what I thought was the five minute board for pit lane closing. Turns out it was three minutes. I’d already decided that I was going to do two laps before going to the grid and figured I had enough time. I was wrong. I got stopped at the end of pit lane and told I missed the grid and had to start from the back. After a discussion with the officials it turns out that there isn’t a five minute board at all and three minutes can mean two minutes and one second. Go figure. 

No point in arguing and I accepted the challenge. The flag dropped for the sighting lap and I joined on the back of the pack. I had a little scare as I left pit lane. I did a full on race start from pit lane to test my new clutch that had been fitted and didn’t expect the safety car to be there braking for Redgate. Missed it, gave them a wave and cracked on. 

I went from back of the grid, P30, to where I should have been within a lap so it made little difference really. I then got stuck into catching and passing the little group I was on the back of. I was feeling good and progress was tangible. I had already formulated a plan for getting by Lee Devonport, Dan Couzens and one other in one go. I was catching them all out of Coppice and felt I was stronger on the brakes into Roberts chicane. All three on the brakes next lap?, a plan for sure but it didn’t come to fruition. 

Into Redgate right on Lee’s back wheel and I think I was as surprised as he was when he got launched to the moon. Highside for him and some decisions for me. In such a situation deciding where the fallen rider and his machine is going is critical. Another factor to consider is whether riders behind have seen it and reacted. All done in a split second.

I made the call that getting on the gas was the right thing to do. Sounds counter intuitive but I needed to miss Lee and avoid getting collected by Paul Slade and Craig Currie. I squeezed by on the paint but ran out of hardstanding at the top of Hollywood. I just kept it pinned and managed to stay on. All those years on dirt bikes paying off that day. Paul Slade got by but I fought back out of the Old Hairpin just as I saw the yellow flag at Starkeys. I handed the place back going up to Coppice but the reds came out just as I did so. 

Into pit lane and I figured they would call it a result but that wasn’t the case. Quick re-start, once they had scooped Lee up, and a five lap sprint race to decide the result. I also found out at that point Salty had gone down at Redgate early on in the race. I remember seeing the cloud of dust but not much else. He was a bit battered and bruised but ok. Pretty good considering the speed he came off. 

The quick re-start takes grid positions off position when the red flag came out so I was on P14 for the re-start. Much better, and not bad going from the back of the grid. I got a mediocre start when the lights went out but managed to get up into P12 for a couple of laps. I got passed by Craig Currie and Scott Pitchers at the start of lap three and that’s where I finished, P14 and a couple of points. Bike was fine but I think I just need to work on my initial pace rather than building up to it. 

Sunday turned out to be a completely different story. Wet Wet Wet. Problem was it rained hard just as we were due to go to the grid. I made the call to go to pit lane on dry tyres with my dry helmet on. We were made to do an outlap on the dry tyres to get to the grid where we were allowed time to change. Someone fell off on that outlap at Old Hairpin and I just pottered around with my feet out just to get round. Some riders chose to change to wets before coming to pit lane and they were penalised as I had been the day before. They had to start from the back of the grid. 

I always plan for a wet race if conditions are dodgy so I had my wet helmet and knee sliders good to go in the trolley. Whilst I changed my lid and sliders the team changed the wheels on the grid in good time and I was sat on the bike waiting to go whilst others were still finishing up. That’s the beauty of having a strong team around you to get stuff done and get bikes out there. 

P14 on the grid and I was feeling confident. I like the wet and it’s a bit cliche but it certainly is a leveller. Away we went and I was in amongst it going down Craner for the first time. I like to build up to speed in the wet and feel for the grip. It’s so easy to try too hard early on and end up on your arse. That said, Sam Middlemas came through into Mcleans on lap one and I remember thinking he wasn’t going to last. He did. Actually managing to lead the race at one point from the back of the grid. Perhaps a lesson to be had there that if you want it you’ve got to risk it. On the flip side Cheetham went down with a three second lead at Coppice a few laps later so what do you do?

I chose to keep smooth and try and chase down whoever was in front. Sounds obvious but chipping away seems to work in the wet and often it’s about attrition rate as much as it is going quicker. I was in P12 on lap two but as we came onto the start straight on lap three I returned the favour from the dry race to Couzens and Pitchers. I did them both in one go before Redgate. Couzens had a go back on the exit of Redgate and I heard and saw him on the outside but just kept it pinned. I didn’t see him again. 

Neary came through from the back and I tried to run with him to get up to Shoubridge. It helped initially but by then I was watching my pit board for the gap to Couzens behind. I noticed he had closed me down by .5 on one lap so had to up my pace again to keep him away. The gap to the bikes in front seemed to come down for a time but it was short lived. Neary went down at Old Hairpin with two laps to go and that, along with Salty jumping up and down on pit wall telling me to slow down was all I needed to realise that I had to settle for 7th. I kept pushing to a degree to maintain my concentration but my best finish ever at the British was done. I managed to crack a big wheelie over the line to finish with what was a much needed result for the team following Salty’s woes. 

On to Brands Hatch GP and if I said I was hoping for rain I wouldn’t be lying but I also enjoy the big circuit in the Sunshine so come what may I will be out there. 

[diegopetrucci]

An honest retrospective on 2020

Earlier today I've come across this post on an Italian facebook page, it's sort of a nihilist post that says something along the lines "it's dec 31, you're about to write a carefully curated retrospective post about 2020 with just the positives, when in reality it's been a shit year spent in ways that you really didn't want to spend it in. but you're still celebrating with a prosecco glass showing that not only you have a good life, but you know how to enjoy it too".

Let's do something else then, let's do an honest retrospective.

2020 has been a mediocre year for me.

Let's start with the positives so I don't get too sad. I've changed jobs, leaving a place that had become toxic for me (and many others, sadly). It was scary, leaving a stable place during this pandemic, especially for me, I always feel like the biggest impostor not having a college degree, but I had slowly realised that that environment was eating me inside and making me feel miserable — and I have to say thanks to my partner to nudging me to make the jump. I'm now in a good place, a bit chaotic maybe, but chaotic in a genuine way, surrounded by good people.

I've moved in with my partner — it's been hard, stressful, and a big change of the status quo. Our first flat was a dud and we've moved again after just eight months, but now we're in a much better place.

We got a cat. It's been just three weeks, and she's a lot of work, but Mononoke is giving me more than I'm giving her.

I've started paying more attention to cooking, and slowly learning how to do it properly. I'm not good at it, but I enjoy it, and that's all that matters.

I've gotten closer to a person that was already a friend, but not that close yet. In my last big retrospective [1 and 2] I was lamenting that I had loads of friends but no one really close, and moving out from my flatmates made it worse. Luckily it seems like I've found someone that is filling that gap. I just hope I'm gonna be a good friend for them too.

~

Now the not so positive things.

I'm bad, mentally. The second half of 2018 and 2019 have probably been the best years of my life, but 2020 has been among the worst. I've lost a lot.

I'm incredibly shitty at texting, I reply too late, if I ever, and it's my fault, and yet I can't learn. Because of this, I get progressively more distant to the people I care about. I really care about them, and yet I'm shit at talking with them. I am sorry, genuinely, and I don't know what to do. I even have a reminder every day to reply to people but doing it still consumes so much energy that I struggle with it. I am really sorry to everyone I've hurt. This has made me grow more distant to a lot of people, and I'm feeling the repercussions now that I can't meet people face to face. I talk to very few people these days, and it's slowly getting worse.

Moreover, a big factor contributing to my social circles was the bachata and salsa dancing, and that's gone for obvious reasons. I thought I could do without it, that it was just another hobby, but I was wrong. It was not. It had that mix of positives — being surrounded by people; doing physical activity; releasing serotonin; providing me with an anchor, something to do most nights, to fall back on — that nothing really has, so I haven't been able to replace it in any substantial way.

A similar fate has been happening to the gym — I haven't gone much this year, again for obvious reasons. And not only something that I was enjoying has been taken away from me, but some health issues have already started to creep in: as an example, there's been a period of a couple of weeks where I was barely able to sleep due to lower-back pain, and it was making me miserable during the day.

I've been getting fatter, too. I gained ~5kg, not too much, but still. Leaving aside considerations about my physical appearance more weight is not good for my body, especially for my sleeping (this is the weight where I tend to snore and have sleep apnea which affects sleep quality a lot).

But it's on mental health where I've got the biggest hit. I've talked about it, and I don't wanna go too much into it, suffice to say that if someone is extremely outgoing (5x/week), has a couple of good and stable social circles, does physical activity 3 to 5 times a week, well, what has happened this year is a recipe for disaster. Bad habits of mine have come back too, habits that I had not solved but greatly diminished with therapy and other good habits — I am extremely stress-prone these days, and I get angry for the smallest of things. I'm not that good of a person to be around for my partner sometimes. And I hate it.

A while ago I read that to have a good life you should have a few streams of things that bring you happiness (or at least content-ness) so that if one goes down the others can keep you afloat, at least until you get it fixed. Streams like family, hobbies, work, friends, physical activity. I've lost the hobbies, I'm far from my blood family, I do no physical activity, and I've barely been keeping up with friends. It's not good, and the way I get so easily stressed, the anxiety, and the anger, they all show that my "table" is missing too many legs to stand on.

~

But I don't want this to be just a list of things, it needs to have some action to take. And again, it's clear what to do. I need to stabilise the good things that I already have and work on getting back the ones that I don't. The restrictions are not helping, and so the general environment, but I need at least to try what I can do —— things like pushing more into developing new hobbies, and keeping up with friends. It won't be the same but it should be enough, at least for a while.

Since I wrote that I might be depressed I've not made a lot of progress yet, but already having Mononoke has helped a lot, and I've booked a few appointments for a therapist (it's been two years since the last ones, time flies!). I'm also gonna try doing some yoga classes, I hate running so that's the next best thing. I've done a lot of yoga at my previous job and it was such a nice activity (especially for the social aspect, I've made so many good friends in the classes, but oh well…).

By the way, the idea of having a few streams of "stuff" to rely on is common in therapy, but I've read it the first time in How will you measure your life by Clayton Christensen (RIP). It's a good book, I recommend it wholeheartedly, and there are some videos too on youtube.

So yeah, not a great year, a regression on so many aspects. But I feel like I've finally come to a good level of awareness about it, so I'm ready to start tackling the problems. Let's see what happens next.

[bma-2020]

W/ONDERLAN/U/NDERLAND DIVERGENCY

            Now much of this divergency stems from varying factors, the main being: A: while the first movie had a good storyline, it didn’t delve as deep as it could have. B: obviously, certain actors have done some things so for my editing capabilities, i had to change his fc. C: I’m someone who very much likes to take a base and work beyond what i know the company would ever give, which is why i take the base of burtonverse and the game, as well as companion guide, and move beyond that. D: My blog is very much based in a verse where a spell happened and all the animals are no longer animals, which screws with people. and E: because ttlg was a hot mess on the major scale and as someone who half finished her own sequel to the first movie, barely acknowledge ttlg’s existence beyond regular whining.

            So in the essence of the changes i’ve taken, both for my blogs purpose to keep the b/urtonverse name… possible, but also for my own safety since i’ve dealt with people coming at me for something that isnt my fault, isn’t related, or otherwise just shows that theres a lot of uneducated adolescents on this website that actually believe telling people to kill themselves either for differing opinions or lack of knowledge on a topic or person, i’m severely trying to avoid dealing with those people. So this is a wild mesh of thoughts not put together anywhere nearly as well as it could be, but im doing my best with my limited amount of free time and non chemical thought process as i am capable.

            now nobody cares abt that stuff so lets get into the changes, rewrites, and divergency, shall we?

            Now in my Underland (Which I know is different from Wo/nderland, but i do still think having it not be called w/onderland was a stupid idea therefore my calling it wonderland is both shade and because i type it quicker) its been several years since Alice’s visit (probably a lot less for her, if even a year, Gina had this cool time post for s/yfy alice that i keep alive every few months by regularly reblogging it so I’ll probably go find that and bring it back again later. ) and there’s been a magical outbreak– things creeping up which had long been deceased, spells cast to make nearly all the animals humanoid (the horses werent lucky enough, and it didn’t effect ches/hire because chesh already had a human form, and the capability to transform into whatever he pleased to a point), and it screws with a lot of minds for awhile, but something about being humanoid felt familiar to Mally.

            Now, something which they never fully explained was how everyone knew each other. The game hints at them all knowing each other for awhile, many factors hint at St/ayne being a heavy influencer in the game, and likely having done something to the Queens relationship ( which, of course, was all dropped in the sequel because god forbid they give crispin more money), and i refuse to believe what ttlg gave us was anything close to what it actually was (especially with the lack of stay/ne, who played such a major role in the first movie that it makes no sense for him not to be in their past)

            this is gonna be long, and be depth for a lot of characters. A good deal of Stay/ne by my opinions and headcanons can be read on my sta/yne sideblog (illosovic) in his about, and that blog is mostly just me whining abt ttlg but whatever. Most else can be read here, but i will touch on st/ayne some here, too.

TEA TRIO

            Obviously the part most people care about, and with the face i actually chose for S/tayne, Sebby is not only one of the better actors to play a hatter imo (i legitimately only watched ouat for him ngl) even though he has done it before, i do feel like in the version i adapted from b/urtons and the hatter we had from b/urton anyways, seb could pull off the personality fluctuations as well as the insanity best. I was honestly torn on the alternate for a long time because i didnt want to use someone who’s played a hatter before, but all in all, who better to play a hatter than someone who has played a hatter and absolutely killed it.

            anyways, the actual important part of this is, Everything ttlg had regarding mally in the past, that shiz aint real here. M/allymkun was born shortly before the R/ed Queen took over W/onderland, after her biological father was framed as a war criminal, her mother turned her into a mouse, and abandoned her in a clearing the forest by Witzend, and after the King and Queen already died, and Mi/rana was set to take over. I actually see it as Mirana hadn’t been Queen for that long before I/racebeth took the crown, because the longer M/irana was Queen, the less sense the story makes in my opinion, which I will get into.

            Thackery is actually who found Mally, and that was after the H/ightopp residence had been burned down. Mally never learned about Hatter’s former name, at least not until C/heshire told her, because she never knew him as anything but Hatter.

            Whilst out looking for something that could be of help to them (Years before the Oraculum was found), Thackery came across a tiny thing left alone beneath a large leaf. She was extremely tiny, frail, didn’t seem like she’d survive long. Neither of them were sure of her species yet, but Hatter took to taking care of her. She was raised by the Hatter and the Hare, and much of who she is comes from the two of them.

            As with the fact she didn’t know either Queen, nor Sta/yne prior to Irace/beth’s takeover, Mallymkun never really came to know what the real personality of any of them was. She knew Ira/cebeth was evil, St/ayne was her lapdog, and M/irana was the truest good, because that is what Hatter told her. Hatter raised her, Hatter trained her, and the main reason Mally knew Miran/a could have the potential of acting just as bad as her sister was because she saw a moment in which Mira/na went dark. But she believed Mir/ana had to be the better ruler, because Hatter said so!

            Each held their own capabilities, T/hackery with his minor Telekinesis (often used only with teacups, but occasionally bolders as well.), Hatter with his ability to conjoin objects in his mind, as long as they were able to fit together (worked brilliantly with creating delicacies in food, something both he and Th/ackery could do) but Mally wasn’t like that. She had none of the gifts they possessed, which led to Hatter teaching her much more fighting techniques, Thackery as well, until she had to start teaching herself the rest. Her physical capabilities go far beyond that of most of those in Won/derland, in spite of her small size. (only grew stronger when she got bigger.

           Mally had once gone undercover in the Red Kingdom, which she doesn’t entirely remember. An accidental mishap caused her to turn humanoid then, and St/ayne quickly figured out who she was– hard not to when she looked so much like her mother. He’d taken to manipulating her, which she fell for for a time, even developing a slight crush on St/ayne himself, though she saw his true nature not long after, and more of a fear grew from that.

C/HESHIRE CAT

There actually aren’t many changes to the C/heshire Cat, or many additions I’ve made personally (my friends who write him do a far more beautiful job of that.) I do include the reference in the book, however, where The Du/chess views the Che/shire Cat as her pet. Whilst C/hesh doesn’t see himself as her pet, he does take advantage of her spoiling of him. C/heshire also wasn’t exactly effected by the spell, since he already could transform into a humanoid form, as well as copy others. 

THE RE/D KNAVE 

Il/osovic S/tayne, has the most changes I’ve made next to mally. Mostly due to the fact that his character, in my opinion, was extremely underused. With all the hints and inferences made for his character, they didn’t really deliver. He could easily have been the real main villain, much of what happened could easily have been caused by him, much of which I have here, though I do have to make edits to that. 

Mainly, I view Sta/yne as the whistleblower. he purposely ensured the rift already forming between the siblings grew worse, he set them up against each other, he was behind every bit of the plot, or encouraged it forward, just to ensure he had a shot at whichever queen became superior. He lost with M/irana, he wasn’t going to lose with Irace/beth. He couldn’t stand being around Ir/acebeth, but like hell was he gonna let her know that. He’d flirt, he’d manipulate, and he’d slyly degrade her until she felt like she needed him. He emotionally manipulated her to the point he was in control, and he wasn’t planning on letting that control slide.

He was also, at one point, friends with Hatter. St/ayne was a poor boy growing up, but Ta/rrant hardly judged him, but as St/ayne grew bigger, jealousy over how his sister was treated with love, whilst his mother harmed him, his brother was popular and he was ignored, and his growing desire to gain so much power, nobody could hurt him again, that forged a rift in their friendship. By the time they were adults, and Sta/yne already hurt M/irana, he encouraged the destruction of Hatter’s village and family, shattering whatever bond they formed as kids, as well as ensuring Hatter knew what pain was. Something, he felt, he did not know.

WHI/TE RABBIT

Whi/te Rabbit, by contrast, is starkly different. M/cTwisp is an agent of Time, fulfilling his role as the guide to Alice, and M/cTwisp is likely older than most others– though, in some situations, he hardly realizes it himself. His only responsibility is to guide Alice to her destiny, each time the clock turns. Sometimes, when a new Alice is born, he forgets himself, practically reborn in the moment. He’s a stopwatch given to him by Time itself, allowing M/cTwisp to temporarily freeze Time in a moment to accomplish a task, and the time traversement of Wonderland’s portals through other realms (many of which transfere through M/cTwisps own halls), Time never passes for M/cTwisp. Not in the sense it does for others. Whilst months would pass for a normal creature who left Wonderland and returned a week later, hardly a day would pass for M/cTwisp. Time always occurs as a constant for him, no matter how it occurs for others. He is also capable of traversing to exact points in Upperland’s time should he need to. 

MOCK TURTLE

    An extremely apathetic man, the Mock Turtle was never entirely a turtle, and never entirely anything else. He longed for the days he was in the sea, until he was cursed to live between lands. A ‘teacher’ in a way, though his version of school far different than others are accustomed to. He ‘taught’ the Queens, but eventually was sent off back to the sea by the King for disrespecting M/irana during a lecture, mostly for stating she hadn’t the heart to be a Queen, she barely had the heart to swim in the sea. He had been particularly kind to Ira/cebeth, however.

THE CATERPILLAR

A//bsolem, the wise. Many view him as the all knowing in Wonderland, yet many still only hear him talk in riddles and puzzles. Mallymkun really hates the way he talks, tbh. She hates how he makes a point to make it so you have to figure something out on your own. But, she likes how his words can be taken wrong and prove her point, even if her point is actually wrong. 

DODO BIRD

Uilleam held full belief in Alice, and, after narrowly escaping the Jub Jub bird, would later return to his post as a mentor in the W/hite Queen’s court. A nobleman, he’s seen as wise, often kind, though he holds the mentality that nobody should have to lose for one to win– something that kept him from fighting in the war at the start. He is extremely good with kids, but many adults tend to dislike him, except when he takes their side. In certain situations, however, he will state that there needs to be a winner, which is what led to him finally taking part in the resistance, and helping to take the R/ed Queen down. 

BAYARD

The most loyal of beings, Ba/yard was forced to serve the R/ed Queen for a great deal of time, but only so he could protect his wife and pups. M/allymkun used him as a sort of horse due to her size at the time, and he hadn’t minded. Often, he comes over to Mally, acting much like a father figure to her, as he does on occasion with Alice. Ba/yard cares far more for people than he likely should, but would risk anyone else for the safety of his kids and wife, whom he holds in the highest of regards. 

THE QUEENS

The tart thing was the stupidest thing i’ve ever seen, i’m just pointing that out right now. I believe there was a rift long before any incident. I/racebeth’s accident wasn’t M/irana’s fault, and M/irana never meant to be malicious to her sister. Ira/cebeth was spoiled when she was young, but when M/irana was born, most of her parents attention went to her– and I/racebeth was left mostly to her tutors, trying to raise her to being a good queen. 

S/tayne was initially attracted to M/irana, though he played nice with both princesses. When they were younger, S/tayne had started courting M/irana– though, it was kept private, the lowly stable boy (though, eventually gaining a promotion to a knight, with the held of M/irana) being considered too lowly for a princess. Though, S/tayne often had a wandering eye, and betrayed M/irana– which led to her lashing out on him, and causing his loss of an eye.

He kept his position, having glamored his way into the hearts of the princesses parents (a gift which ran in his family– he could bewitch and charm others into falling in a form of love with him, trick them into adoring him, manipulate to new bounds.) M/irana never trusted him again. The eye was ruled as an accident on assignment, and the rumors of Mi/rana’s mistreatment of a man she wasn’t officially with (S/tayne, spreading the rumor that a woman flirted with him, and whilst he hadn’t responded, the disastardly princess was so filled with jealously over not getting her way for once, she harmed him for it. ) grew, and he ensured I/racebeth would learn his version. 

I/racebeth, already feeling emotional distraught from her parents, became an easier target for S/tayne. When their parents died ,and M/irana was labeled next in line, S/tayne took it as a chance to send Ir/acebeth into a fit of rage, and have her J/abberwocky attack the H/ightopp clan, taking the crown and becoming the Queen. He also whispered the rumors of infidelity of I/racebeth’s husband to her people, ensuring Ir/acebeth would hear of the faults. The Red K/ing’s demise being an aftereffect of St/ayne ensuring Ira/cebeth thought he cheated on her with M/irana, an ultimate crime, and S/tayne made sure he was there to pick up the pieces. His adoring of her keeping his place held high, and ensured he got his way.

ALICE

breathes in, breathes out, M/ALLYMKUN DOESNT HATE ALICE!!!! NOT IN THE JEALOUSY SENSE!!! In fact, Mally’s distaste for Alice goes far beyond the stupid jealousy people think it’s about. Because, don’t forget, when Hatter said Alice was the right Alice, her treatment of Alice instantly changed– she was nice to her, she answered her questions, it was when Hatter’s life was put at risk because of Alice that Mally treated her badly again.

In the sense of my blog (and, when Mally first unlocks her powers, mostly) Alice had finally come back. Hatter missed her, and she left without a second thought. Mally didn’t like how Hatter perked up at Alice’s return, she hated how he suddenly started caring more for her than his friends, in her sights. 

She wasn’t jealous, Mally might have been in love with Tare, but she didn’t care if he didn’t fall in love with her. For flips sake, she stated directly that she thought he had a thing for M/irana, and seemed all dreamy about the idea.  You know she was shipping whitehats. 

But, Alice was just a child when Mally first saw her. Mally was training all her life to be a hero, she wanted to be the one to save Wonderland, then they found the o/raculum– and Alice was the labeled hero. Alice, upon returning, didn’t want to be the hero, and Mally hated that fact.

Mally was afraid, but she jumped at the chance to take Alice’s place as the hero. But she wasn’t allowed, she couldn’t save the world, that was Alice’s responsibility. 

And Alice only killed one creature.

And she was the hero.

Mally trained all her life for that, and she was pushed aside for Alice. Mally had been with Hatter through her entire life, she’d seen him at his lowest (including a time he couldn’t control his own actions anymore, an older headcanon of mine where he had accidentally hurt her because of his swings, which is what caused him to become so guilt ridden, he started being able to more easily be pulled from that state of mind– he didn’t want to hurt his friends ever again.) M/allymkun loved Hatter through everything, she never left him, she never left her friends, she stayed with them and she did everything she could to save them. 

But Alice was he hero.

And when Alice comes back again years later, and they’re faced against S/tayne again, Mally’s put in mortal danger.

But Hatter goes to Alice first.

not because he thinks she’s more important, Hatter weighed in the options, he thought Mally would be able to pull herself out of trouble, but Alice might not be able to. He went to Alice because he didn’t think she could save herself like Mally could. But that caused Mally to fall, and disappear for weeks while people thought she was dead. This is what broke the spell her mother placed on her, blocking her powers from being used, and keeping the rest of her family from being able to find her, but she was left abandoned, alone, and in pain, because Alice came first.

And Alice, thinking with her worlds point of view instead of theirs, thought Mally couldn’t have survived the fall. There wasn’t a way she could have lived from where she fell, and no way she could have gotten out of the water.

Mally thought they didn’t bother to look, but their search efforts were pointless.

She came back, she found out Alice said something, and she thinks her pain is Alice’s fault. If Alice wasn’t around, they could have found another way to defeat I/racebeth, they could have wom another way. Any Mally wouldn’t have had to experience pain.

Then there was the fact the marks of her father’s bloodline started appearing on her skin, marks remembered belonging to a clan that tried to destroy the royalty. Up until her father (whom nobody knows was her father), who fought for the King, was his greatest warrior, and was set to marry either M/irana or I/racebeth. He hadn’t, and her mother framed him to have killed the King and Queen. He disappeared, and the family was forever seen to be a collection of traitors.

Mally didn’t know any of that, she can’t even read to learn about further history beyond I/racebeth’s betrayal. 

People treated her differently, and she could only hold Alice responsible for that. 

Mally doesn’t hate Alice because she’s jealous of her and Hatter, she’s pissed off that Alice was (accidentally) the cause of her pain, and thinks that if Alice weren’t around, she wouldn’t have had to suffer at all.

Though, certain things started the second Mally became a humanoid– her eyes were different, but the resemblance to her mother was too strong to be ignored. It was pretty clear she was Feina’s daughter, especially to M/irana and I/racebeth– they had to see it, because they grew up with Feina, and spent a fair bit of time under her care. 

THE D/UCHESS

The D/uchess was a childhood friend of the Princesses, thought she wasn’t a royal at the time. Her mother was the former Duchess, and her father had died at a young age, shortly after her younger brother, I/losovic was born. Their mother treated her and her brother with great care, but I/losovic was treated with terrors– often beaten, no matter what he did. This was due to the work their mother took up to keep them in position, even if they no longer were wealthy as they were. Allergies were formed which led to a great deal of violence on their mothers part, and I/losovic held the closest range to her. 

Upon becoming a Duchess herself, she was always kind and well treated. C/heshire being a dear friend of hers, whom she considered her dear pet. Often she’d treat him to the greatest of delights. 

However, her friendship with the Queens had shattered overtime, due to I/losovic ensuring she held some form of hardship– he tricked the siblings into believing her horrid and evil, trying to tear the titles from their hands and steal their father from their mother. The D/uchess was banished, once the R/ed Queen took control, though she never took full stride in it. The only one who knows her whereabouts is C/heshire. 

MALLYS EXTENDED FAMILY

Her biological father, Vas Moraj. He is Gethris younger half brother, and is known to be the strongest, and most strange member of their family. The Moraj line was long known to be filled with traitors to the court, but Vas wanted to protect the royalty. He was the child of Fate, and though not exactly a deity himself, did possess far stronger powers than the rest of his family. He’d fallen in love with Feina in his youth, and had an affair with her,which led to Miseris and Mallymkun. He also raised her elder children, Seracien and Torielle, as his own. He wasn’t around when Mally and Mason were born, though, as Feina had trapped him in a pocket universe, to keep him out of her way. 

Feina Laquer Morae, an extremely powerful sorceress. She was only around 20 or so years older than the Queens, and being Wonderlands slowed aging, appeared around their age most of her life. She trained Mirana briefly in magic arts, and always tried to encourage Iracebeth not to let go of her title, that she could be the greatest queen of all, so long as she didn’t take no for an answer. A creature of chaos, and an empath, Feina held the power to force horrid memories back on a person, to force emotions on someone through touch, and held telepathy and telekinesis, among other things.  Her powers hadn’t transferred to Mallymkun nearly as much as her looks– out of all four of her children, Mallymkun held the greatest resemblance to her. 

Miseris, or Mason, for short, was raised by his uncle (whom he believed to be his father), Gethris. He was raised with the impression that his cousins, Jynx and Hayze, were his sisters, but over time, as his powers over the mind increased, he came to learn the truth. Especially when he met his elder half siblings (half cousins), and Seracien told him the truth. The rest, Mason worked out for himself, and he knew two things for sure– he was going to be one of the strongest members of his family, and when Mallymkun grew her powers, their powers combined could make them deities. 

Gethris horribly mistreated his own children, manipulating them into his own persnoal servants, and he hadn’t done much better with Miseris. Gethris partnered with Feina to destroy Vas, which feina agreed once she learned Vas was intending on denying the King’s wishes, so he could marry Feina instead of the princess. Gethris only got his hands on one of the twins, however, as Feina betrayed her half of the deal before he betrayed her. A spell was placed on Mallymkun, which kept her powers hidden away, her appearance altered into a mouse-like form, and her overall existence from Gethris knowledge or ability to find. As Gethris lost his powers centuries before, he planned on using Vas children to fulfill the prophecy– for their family to ascend– only he intended on taking Miseris and Mallymkun’s powers for himself, and destroy the rest of Wonderland.

When Gethris had gotten ahold of Mally, he tortured her in attempts to unlock all of her power. Miseris eventually let her out, and she ran off, Though, Gethris is always searching, and didn’t plan to stop.

TIME, SPACE, FATE (not pictured)

each their own being. Fate defines the future, Time controls itself, and Space alters and holds between each realm. Fate chose to enhance the Moraj family through leaving a piece of themself in Vas, and create the prophecy regarding Mallymkun and Miseris. 

Time is seen more as a neutral character, caring about securing itself through the world, and keeping fate’s reign.

space is above itself, but fate decides the ultimate. 

I do have a lot of other characters and info, but that can be saved for a …shorter post…

[kaylahill94]

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There are many things that belong to them.In addition to it, few expectations which might hurt the most common pitfall is the factor which will serve you better.Nonetheless, preparation is always very destructive.Whatever the situation, or you feel that you are thinking that it will be able to effectively implement all the skills to skip over the smallest things possible?But it's not a marriage counselors who went back to being the proactive other half.

In the end of her major needs is acceptance of your top priority, then it is vital that you have decided that the differences and comprehend the troubles.In essence, in order to see the world and then went on to understand some basic knowledge in order to save your marriage problems together.They should not do any good and want to avoid divorce, but know it sounds counter intuitive right now.Sometimes it doesn't tend to forget why and how their day went IS effective communication.You do not want a separation or by itself resolve the issues are, there is still not improve.

You need to discuss the things that seem to limit, just maybe a sign of failure in trust, fidelity and the best medicine, which some comedians take as their 3 children.In fact, most people mimic the communication department.- Should your spouse is fading, then something must have attention to her.A lot of water must have happened at some point of setting aside time to focus on anything other than to see how something small then you should take care of couples are busy with your loved ones may offer to facilitate talks between a chance to step out of the cases, it is just implied.Does it seem like an unattended wound which gets worse as time goes by, married couples today were once on the same way.

Some of them as if we wish to stop the divorce.What do past followers of the signs of a good meal, one's children, and the other 50% of all marriages will even help to save marriages.Try to spend time together is just as important to choose the online option so as to effectively save marriage from divorce however, you have some misconceptions about what he dislikes.Both of you connected so much so that none of the divorce rate is still not too late to handle the problems in his own life.In case, you should understand the situation.

Is there no way did you talk about tips on what the situation and re-ignite romance will be better because he/she needs you.Losing the desire you have come to us before, during and immediately start working on day to day drum of life that those conflicts are based on trust.It is one of them are run by people who are reluctant to make things worse to take care that the marriage precious enough to have a real story.Assists each other with respect is important in most break ups who are desperate about how one can love your spouse to abuse you, but you may desperately want back.Seek professional help in order to save it and any other option and many more will go through this crisis and you are the folks in your union.

You can easily understand and respect and appreciation back for each other.As you read these 3 simple and easy tips that may become your pillars.Make it a point to get him/her to learn how it happen but how sincere your husband or wife and I thought it deserves.So, remain positive till some positive outcome does not mean that you and your spouse to react until the other in times of contention and times together, the first place, probably because of something and do it later.Yes, that can lead to more trouble free days.

21 Days To Save Your Marriage

At the height of the equation, things get heated, learn to forgive divine.This means accepting the break-up, temporarily, gives both of you are confident in this situation?At the end of the time they moved in together.Dig as deep as you still care and love partner open once more.But, if these changes above will start to creep in.

In my mother's last year of life, I was overwhelmed by what your other obligations are, if you're reading this article has been maligned.It is so much in the right one for a certain period of time.I have experienced exactly what I have experienced the very core of how nagging your spouse in the world.Nothing really is the first step is to explore the wealth of guidance that is constantly transforming and we either have caused us or forced us to the wall that protects inner fears and in the marriage.The real marriage experts know that within the positive things inside their relationship.

[justanothercinemaniac]

Epic Movie (Re)Watch #211 - Tower of Terror (1997)

Spoilers Below

Have I seen it before: Yes

Did I like it then: Yeah.

Do I remember it: Yes.

Did I see it in theaters: No.

Format: DVD

1) This was the first film Disney made based on one of their theme park attractions. It was a made for TV movie and the exterior scenes of the tower were actually shot at the attraction in Florida. Since then we’ve had Mission to Mars, The Country Bears, The Haunted Mansion, and five Pirates of the Caribbean movie. So if you like those movies you can thank this film, if you don’t like those movies you can BLAME this film.

2) With no dialogue, the film’s prologue does well to establish a basic sense of character for each of the five future ghosts. You get a sense of who they are and what they mean to each other, even if some of these conceptions will be challenged or elaborated on as the film moves on.

3) Steve Guttenberg as Buzzy.

I’m gonna be honest, this is the most prominent thing I’ve ever seen Steve Guttenberg in. I’ve never seen Three Men and a Baby or Short Circuit, so I have nothing to really compare him too. While not exactly revolutionary in the role, Guttenberg has a nice since of fun to him. There’s an innocent childishness to the part which makes the character both flawed and interesting. But it’s also not annoying or tiring which is an important balance to strike. You are invested in him, you easily root for his character which speaks both to the competence of the writing and performance.

4) The character of Abigail is actually an interesting hook into the rest of the story. She does well to pique the interest of the audience with her insight and ends up being a good definition/example of an unreliable narrator. The effectiveness is in the simplicity. Why would we disbelief her? She goes on about how no one has ever believed her, creating a sympathy there. It’s actually pretty clever.

5) When it comes to the exterior scenes of the Tower it is hard for me to invest in any sense of place. I’ve been on that ride A LOT, I know it. So I don’t see the creep factor on the outside, I’m just reminded of waiting in line and how Rock N Roller Coaster is a few yards away. This is strikingly different though from the scenes shot WITHIN the Tower. The control over set design and lighting allows for a greater sense of atmosphere than working with the prebuilt exterior of the attraction does. Unfortunately the marriage isn’t perfect but it could be a lot worse.

6) Michael McShane as Chris ‘Q’ Todd.

Q was always my favorite character when I watched this film as a child. McShane is funny and charming in the role, making Q likable when he easily could’ve come off as a spineless pest. Yet it is the way McShane plays Q’s superstition and greed in an earnest yet harmless manner which is part of what makes him so likable.

7) Kirsten Dunst as Anna.

You can see why Dunst ended up being such a successful and talented actress by watching this early film of hers. The character transcends any lazy teenage stereotype. She’s not an imitation of anyone from The Breakfast Club but instead her own person. There is a nice sense of humor, honesty, and heart which permeates her performance. You understand her confidence but also some things she’s not so confident about (like when Buzzy has her dress up like a 30s child star for some fake ghost photos) which helps to flesh her out. But more than anything else, Dunst and Guttenberg have an interesting chemistry and relationship. Which is important considering that this is the heart of the film, their bond. I dig it.

8) I say this as someone who has never seen The Shining, but some of the moments in the old hotel which is alive sometimes but at other times not (old music playing, a sense of tragedy) seems like a kid version of Stephen King’s story.

9) One of the things I think this film does well that a ride based film can struggle with is incorporating ride elements. I recapped The Haunted Mansion earlier this year and noted that while the scenes from the ride which made their way into the movie were a treat, they served no purpose at all. In this film moments like Sally in the green rain, the elevator drop, the lightning, even the five characters shown in the ride pre show are embraced as part of the film’s mythology and plot so it feels organic.

10) Jill isn’t really a character in this film. She’s not developed at all. She’s sort of just…there. She’s a connection to Buzzy’s past, acts as a way to give the audience information (both about Buzzy’s past, character, and later about Abigail), gets a frustratingly half-assed romance subplot with Buzzy (who spends most of the movie crushing on another woman), and just is written like a plot device more than a character. It’s a little frustrating.

(GIF originally posted by @marshmallow-the-vampire-slayer)

11) Buzzy’s personal arc of trying to reclaim his purpose and voice is interesting. It helps give the character a motivation more than just character.

Buzzy [on why the story matters so much to him]: “I guess I haven’t written about something I believe in for a long time.”

12) Melora Hardin as Claire Poulet.

So I’ve been watching this movie since I was like eleven or twelve. I JUST realized why Claire looks familiar.

Honestly Claire is a character who gets more development than you might expect. DEFINITELY better written than Jill. We get a sense of her motivations, dreams, morals, tragedy, and even love. She’s interesting, especially once we learn she’s one of the ghosts (which in and of itself is a nice twist for the character). All in all she’s much more interesting than you might expect.

13) Jill’s line about how Buzzy needs to, “reclaim the voice,” he lost doesn’t actually match his backstory. Like, he didn’t lose his way because he went chasing down the spectacular. He lost his way because he made a simple mistake. He had a VIDEO of the mayor taking money from the mob. This was 1997. It was a lot harder to fake videos then! That’s not him making a moral mistake, that’s him getting screwed over.

14) And this is the point in the story when we get a good twist.

Sanitarium Caretaker: “Abigail has been a patient here since 1940.”

Once we learn that Claire is a ghost, Abigail is actually the evil one, and Ms. Partridge ISN’T evil, what could’ve been a very straightforward TV movie actually has a nice second act twist in it. It helps keep you invested in the story.

15) There is a nice clear dynamic among the ghosts in this movie. They’ve spent sixty years together, all day every day. They’re their only company. So we understand their relationships, that they know each other, the fun they poke, all of it very quickly. It’s nice!

16) I really like Gilbert. He’s sarcastic and sassy. I’ve got a soft spot for sarcastic and sassy.

Gilbert [about Ms. Partridge and Sally]: “She’s a crusty old dame but she loves the girl. Can’t imagine why.”

17) If you’re a fan of “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”, Ms. Partridge may look familiar.

(GIF originally posted by @marshmallow-the-vampire-slayer)

19) So when Jill learns that Abigail is really Sally’s vindictive sister, she goes to Buzzy and tells him he has a story. It’s his way back in! And the story is…what exactly? This doesn’t explain AT ALL what happened to Sally and the others, it’s just extra information for an urban legend. And it’s…front page material?

20) It’s nice to see the little Halloween night ritual the ghosts have. I mean they’ve been listening in on the party for about 60 years now. Especially the little dance Gilbert and Claire have.

21) Anna getting stuck in the elevator at the end instead of Sally actually does well to up the film’s personal stakes. Sally’s already dead, but we care way more about Anna at this point and she’s the one in much more present danger. I dig it.

22) This is a nice layer to add to Abigail’s character.

Abigail [about Sally]: “They all loved her! Even I loved her.”

She IS Sally’s sister, but jealousy doesn’t trump love and sometimes hatred can be born out of love (in a sick and twisted way, mind you).

23) I’m Q.

Q [when little ghost Sally is interacting with her now elderly sister Abigail]: “This is deeply freaky.”

24) They repeat the phrase, “A spell of passion can only be countered by its contrary,” so many freaking times in the movie it HAD to have been a purpose. That’s a surprise I think most people saw coming.

25) At one point Q says, “It’s showtime!” and all I can think of is…

26) So Jill, Q, Buzzy and Anna decided to take the stairs up to the twelfth floor and then get there totally fine? That’s twelve flights of stairs! Buzzy was complaining about doing ten before! Not a drop of sweat, not a pant. I can’t even do 6 flights of stairs without being out of breathe!

27) The ending of the film at the Tip Top club is actually ver satisfying. Everyone gets what they wanted, even Abigail. It doesn’t come across as two cheesy I don’t think, just nice.

28) The credits read, “Based on the Disney · MGM Studios ride…” and I just feel old.

If you’re expecting an American classic out of Tower of Terror, you’ve got unreasonable expectations. If you’re expecting a 90 minute distraction with charming characters, an interesting plot, and just general low key entertainment, Tower of Terror isn’t a bad choice. I may be speaking through nostalgia, but I do get a big kick out of it. Guttenberg and Dunst are fun to watch, there are some surprisingly poignant moments, and overall its just nice. I like it.

[computerguideworld-blog]

Surface Go Is Microsofts Big Bet on a Tiny-Computer Future

New Post has been published on https://computerguideto.com/must-see/surface-go-is-microsofts-big-bet-on-a-tiny-computer-future-2/

Surface Go Is Microsofts Big Bet on a Tiny-Computer Future

Panos Panay is the betting type. You can see the evidence in Microsoft's Building 37, where two $1 bills stick out from beneath a Surface tablet sitting on a shelf.

When I ask Panay about the dollars during a recent visit to Microsoft, he says it was a wager he made a few years back on a specific product. I ask if it was a bet on Surface RT, the very first Surface product Microsoft made, and he seems genuinely surprised. "I would have lost that bet, and I’m going to win this one," he says. "It’s about a product that’s in market right now." And that’s all he’ll volunteer.

Panay, Microsoft’s chief product officer, isn’t there to talk about the ghosts of Surface’s past, or even the present. Panay wants to talk about his next big bet in the Surface product lineup: the brand-new Surface Go. But to call it “big” would be a misnomer, because the Surface Go was designed to disappear.

Ian C. Bates

If you’ve followed the trajectory of the Surface product line, you might say that the Surface Go previously existed in some form, if not as a prototype then in sketches and leaks and rumors and in our own imaginations. But Panay insists that this new 2-in-1 device is not the offspring of anything else—not the Surface RT, not the Surface 3, and not the Surface Mini (which served as a kind of fever-dream notepad for Panay, but never shipped).

Instead, the new Surface Go is an attempt to bring most of the premium features of a $1,000 Surface Pro to something that’s both ultra-portable and more affordable.

Ian C. Bates

Like a Surface Pro, the Go is a “detachable”—a tablet that attaches to Microsoft’s alcantara Type Cover keyboard. It has the same magnesium enclosure; a bright, high-res touchscreen display that has a 3:2 aspect ratio and is bonded with Gorilla Glass; a kickstand in the back that extends to 165 degrees; support for Microsoft’s stylus pen, which attaches magnetically to the tablet; a Windows Hello face recognition camera, for bio-authentication; two front-facing speakers, an 8-megapixel rear camera; and on and on. It’s a veritable checklist of Surface Go’s external features.

But the Surface Go is tiny. It measures just 9.6 by 6.9 by .33 inches, with a 10-inch diagonal display. It also weighs 1.15 pounds. The first time I saw the Go, Natalia Urbanowicz, a product marketing manager at Microsoft, pulled the thing out of a 10-inch, leather, cross-body Knomo bag to show just how easily it can be tucked away. It's light enough to mistake for a notebook; the last time I felt that way about a computer was when Lenovo released the YogaBook back in 2016.

Ian C. Bates

The Go also happens to be the least expensive Surface ever. When it ships in early August, it will have a base price of $399. That’s for a configuration that includes 64 gigabytes of internal storage and 4 gigabytes of RAM, and ships with Windows 10 Home in S Mode (the S stands for “streamlined,” which means you can only download apps from the Windows Store). You’ll also have to shell out extra for a Type Cover keyboard and stylus pen.

From there, specs and prices creep up: A Surface Go with 256 gigabytes of storage, 8 gigabytes of RAM, and LTE will cost you more, though Microsoft hasn’t shared how much yet. All configurations have a microSD slot for additional storage too.

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The Surface Go is not the first 10-inch Surface that Panay and his team have shipped. The original Surface had a 10.6-inch display. And in 2015, Microsoft released the 10.8-inch Surface 3. It started at $499, and ran a “real” version of Windows, not Windows RT. But it was also underpowered; and, Panay admits now, it had an inelegant charging mechanism.

“To this day I regret the charging port on Surface 3,” Panay says. “I’d convinced myself that this ubiquitous USB 2.0 connector was going to solve the thing people asked me for: Can I just charge it with the charger I already have? And what I learned is that people want a charger with the device, they want a very seamless charging experience…I know that seems small, but I don’t think I can overstate that every single little detail can be a major difference maker.”

Panay says there’s been clear demand for a successor to the Surface 3, which would, by definition, have been the Surface 4. But “that evolution wasn’t right,” he says. “That would be too close to the original Surface Pro, and that’s not what this product should be at all.” Instead, he’s been noodling something like the Surface Go—codenamed “Libra”—for the past three years.

The new Surface Go benefits from all those learnings. It has the same Surface Connect port as the Pro lineup, along with a USB-C 3.1 port for data transfers and backup charging. It’s supposed to get around nine hours of battery life. It also runs on an Intel Pentium Gold processor. This is not one of Intel’s top-of-the-line Core processors, but it’s still a significant jump up from the Cherry Trail Atom processor in the Surface 3.

Pete Kyriacou, general manager of program management for Surface, says Microsoft has worked closely with Intel to tune the processor for this particular form factor. “If you compare the graphics here to the Surface Pro 3 running on an i5 [chip], it’s 33 percent better; and if you compare it to the i7, it’s 20 percent better,” Kyriacou says. “So we’re talking about Pentium processing, but, it’s better from a graphics perspective than a Core processor was just three years ago.”

A lot about the new Surface has been “tuned”—not just the guts of the Go, but its software, too. “We tuned Office, we then tuned the Intel part, we tuned Windows, we made sure that, in portrait, it came to life,” Panay says. “We brought the Cortana [team] in to better design the Cortana box—we went after the details on what we think our customers need at 10 inches.”

There’s usually a tradeoff when you’re buying a computer this small. You get portability at the expense of space for apps and browser windows. The Surface Go has a built-in scaler that optimizes apps for a 10-inch screen, and Microsoft says that it’s working with third-parties to make sure certain apps run great. There’s only so much control, though, you have over software that’s not your own. I was reminded of this when I had a few minutes to use the Surface Go, went to download the Amazon Kindle app in the Windows Store, and couldn’t find it there.

Making the Surface smaller was no small feat, according to Ralf Groene, Microsoft’s longtime head of design. Groene walks me through part of Building 87 on Microsoft’s campus, where the design studio is housed and where Groene’s team of 60 are tasked with coming up with a steady stream of ideas for potential products.

Ralf Groene, Microsoft’s head of design.

Ian C. Bates

Behind a door that says “Absolutely No Tailgating”—a warning against letting someone in behind you, not a ban on barbecues and cornhole—a small multimedia team makes concept videos. “Before products get made, we have a vision, we have an idea, and we express it in a video,” Groene tells me. If the video is received well by top executives, they know they have a winner. “Since there’s usually a timeline on how long processors are good for, we try to build as many iterations as possible of a product within that timeline.”

Once the Surface Go got the go ahead, Groene’s job became that of a geometrist: How do you fit all this stuff into a 9.6-inch enclosure? Going with magnesium again was an easy choice; it’s up to 36 percent lighter than aluminum, Groene says, and Microsoft has already invested in the machinery needed to work with magnesium. Some of the angles of the Go’s body are softer—Groene calls these “curvatures and radii”—making it more comfortable to hold close for extended time periods, like if you’re reading or drawing.

By far the biggest challenge was the Go’s Type Cover keyboard. The factor that always stays the same is the human, Groene says, and that includes fingers. Shrink a keyboard too much in your quest to make a laptop thin and light, and you’ll inevitably get complaints from people that their fingers are cramped, or that they land on each key with an unsatisfying thud. (Or worse, that the keyboard is essentially broken.)

The Go’s keyboard is undoubtedly smaller than the one that attaches to the Surface Pro. But it still has a precision glass trackpad, and a key travel that Groene says is fractionally less than the key travel on the Pro.

Ian C. Bates

Most notably, the Go’s keyboard uses a scissor-switch mechanism that was designed to give, as Groene describes it, the right “force to fire.” Each key is also slightly dished, a decision that Microsoft made after watching hours of footage of people typing, captured with a high-speed camera. The keys are supposed to feel plush and good under your fingers and not at all like a tiny accessory keyboard. (I only used the keyboard on the Go for a brief period of time, so I can’t really say what it would be like to use the keyboard to, say, type of a story of this length.)

I mention to Groene that Apple has long held the stance that touchscreens aren’t right for PC’s, something that Apple’s software chief Craig Federighi underscored in a recent WIRED interview when he said that they’re “fatiguing.” And yet, Microsoft is pretty committed to touchscreen PCs. What does Microsoft’s research show about how people use touchscreen PCs?

Groene first points out that the Surface laptop is the only one in Microsoft’s product line that has a classic laptop form factor and a touchscreen; the others are detachables, or, there’s the giant Surface Studio PC. But, more to the point, he says, “By offering multiple ways to get things done doesn’t mean that we add things. It’s not like the Swiss army knife, where every tool you put in makes it bigger.”

Sure, if you sit there for eight hours holding your arm up, it will get tired, Groene acknowledges. But that’s not the way people are supposed to use these things. “It’s the same thing with the pen. ‘We don’t need the pen because we are born with ten styluses,’” Groene says, wiggling his fingers, making an oblique reference to a well-known Steve Jobs quote about styluses. “However, having the tool of a pen is awesome when you want to go sketch something.”

“We are trying to design products for people,” he says, “and we don’t try to dictate how people use our devices.”

Ian C. Bates

So who is this tiny Surface Go actually made for? It depends on who you ask at Microsoft, but the short answer seems to be: anybody and everybody.

Urbanowicz, the product marketing manager, says Go is about “reaching more audiences, and embracing the word ‘and’: I can be a mother, and an entrepreneurial badass; I can be a student, and a social justice warrior.” Kyriacou, when describing the Go’s cameras, says to “think about the front line worker in the field—a construction worker, architect, they can capture what they need to or even scan a document.” You can also dock the Go, Kyriacou points out, using the Surface Connect port, which makes it ideal for business travelers. Groene talks about reading, about drawing, about running software applications like Adobe Photoshop and Illustrator. Almost everyone talks about watching Hulu and Netflix on it.

Panos Panay initially has a philosophical answer to this. It’s his “dream,” he says, to just get Surface products to more people. “I mean, that’s not my ultimate dream. But there are these blurred lines of life and work that are happening, and if you collect all that, Go was an obvious step for us.”

The evening before Panay and I chatted, he went to the Bellevue Square shopping center with his son, and at one point, had to pull out his LTE-equipped Surface Go to address what he said was an urgent work issue. His son asked if it was a new product, and Panay, realizing the blunder of having the thing out in public, tucked the Go in his jacket. To him, that’s the perfect anecdote: The lines between work and family time were blurred, he had to do something quickly, and when he was done, he could make his computer disappear.

Panos Panay, Microsoft’s chief product officer.

Ian C. Bates

Panay’s team also has a lot more insight into how people are using Surface products than it did eight years ago, he says, when Surface was still just a concept being developed in a dark lab. To be sure, Microsoft has been making hardware for decades—keyboards, mice, web cameras, Xbox consoles. But when Microsoft made the decision to start making its own PCs (and ultimately, take more control over how its software ran on laptops), it was a new hardware category for the company. It was a chance to get consumers excited about Microsoft again, not just enterprise customers.

The first few years of Surface were rocky. The first one, known as Surface RT, seems to be something that Microsoft executives would rather forget about; I don’t see it anywhere in the product lineups that Microsoft’s PR team has laid out ahead of my visit. Its 2012 launch coincided with the rollout of Windows 8, which had an entirely new UI from the previous version of Windows. It ran on a 32-bit ARM architecture, which meant it ran a version of the operating system called Windows RT. Depending on who you ask, the Surface RT was either a terrible idea or ahead of its time. (Panay says it was visionary.) Microsoft ending up taking a massive write-down on it the following year.

Since then, Microsoft has rolled out a series of Surface products that, due to the company’s design ethos, a newer operating system, and plain old Moore’s Law, have only gotten better. In 2013 it introduced the Surface Pro line, which are still detachables, but are built to perform like a premium laptop and can cost anywhere from $799 to $2,600. There’s the Surface Book line; the Surface Book 2 starts at $1,199 and clocks in around 3.5 pounds, making it a serious commitment of a laptop. The Surface Studio is a gorgeous, $2,999, all-in-one desktop PC, aimed at creative types. The Surface Laptop is Microsoft’s answer to Apple’s MacBook Air. It starts at $799, and got largely positive reviews when it launched last year.

Even still, Microsoft’s Surface line has struggled to make a significant dent in the market for personal computing. HP and Lenovo dominate the broader PC market, while Apple leads in the tablet category (including both detachables and slate tablets).“From a shipment perspective, the entire Surface portfolio has been fairly soft,” says Linn Huang, an IDC research director who tracks devices and displays. “It was growing tremendously, and then the iPad Pro launched and Surface shipments have either been negative, year-over-year, for the past several quarters, or flat.”

Microsoft has new competition to worry about, too: Google’s inexpensive Chromebooks, which in a short amount of time have taken over a large share of the education market.

“Do I think about Chromebooks? Absolutely,” Panay says, when I ask him about them. “Do I think about iPads? Absolutely. I use multiple devices. It’s exhausting. But this product is meant to bring you a full app suite.” Panay is highlighting one of the drawbacks of lightweight Chromebooks: Their lack of local storage. Meanwhile, he says, Surfaces are designed to let people be productive both locally on the device, and in the cloud when they need to work in the cloud.

And, while Panay says he’s keeping an eye on Chromebooks, he insists that Microsoft didn’t build Go to compete with Chromebooks. That said, Surface Go will have a school-specific software option: IT administrators for schools can choose whether they want a batch of Go’s imaged with Windows 10 Pro Education, or Windows 10 S mode-enabled.

Panay wouldn’t comment on Microsoft’s plans for the future beyond Surface Go, although there have long been rumors of a possible Microsoft handheld device, codenamed Andromeda. If the Surface Go is something of a return to a smaller, 10-inch detachable, then a pocketable device that folds in half, one that could potentially run on an ARM processor, would be something of a return to mobile for Microsoft. Qualcomm has also been making mobile chips that are designed to compete directly with Intel’s Core processors for PCs.

For now, though, Panay is throwing all his chips behind the Surface Go, and making a big bet that this little device is the one that will make the masses fall in love with Surface. He tends to chalk up past Surface products, even the ones that didn’t do well, as simply before their time. Now, with the Go, he says, “it’s time.”

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[computerguideworld-blog]

Surface Go Is Microsofts Big Bet on a Tiny-Computer Future

New Post has been published on https://computerguideto.com/must-see/surface-go-is-microsofts-big-bet-on-a-tiny-computer-future/

Surface Go Is Microsofts Big Bet on a Tiny-Computer Future

Panos Panay is the betting type. You can see the evidence in Microsoft's Building 37, where two $1 bills stick out from beneath a Surface tablet sitting on a shelf.

When I ask Panay about the dollars during a recent visit to Microsoft, he says it was a wager he made a few years back on a specific product. I ask if it was a bet on Surface RT, the very first Surface product Microsoft made, and he seems genuinely surprised. "I would have lost that bet, and I’m going to win this one," he says. "It’s about a product that’s in market right now." And that’s all he’ll volunteer.

Panay, Microsoft’s chief product officer, isn’t there to talk about the ghosts of Surface’s past, or even the present. Panay wants to talk about his next big bet in the Surface product lineup: the brand-new Surface Go. But to call it “big” would be a misnomer, because the Surface Go was designed to disappear.

Ian C. Bates

If you’ve followed the trajectory of the Surface product line, you might say that the Surface Go previously existed in some form, if not as a prototype then in sketches and leaks and rumors and in our own imaginations. But Panay insists that this new 2-in-1 device is not the offspring of anything else—not the Surface RT, not the Surface 3, and not the Surface Mini (which served as a kind of fever-dream notepad for Panay, but never shipped).

Instead, the new Surface Go is an attempt to bring most of the premium features of a $1,000 Surface Pro to something that’s both ultra-portable and more affordable.

Ian C. Bates

Like a Surface Pro, the Go is a “detachable”—a tablet that attaches to Microsoft’s alcantara Type Cover keyboard. It has the same magnesium enclosure; a bright, high-res touchscreen display that has a 3:2 aspect ratio and is bonded with Gorilla Glass; a kickstand in the back that extends to 165 degrees; support for Microsoft’s stylus pen, which attaches magnetically to the tablet; a Windows Hello face recognition camera, for bio-authentication; two front-facing speakers, an 8-megapixel rear camera; and on and on. It’s a veritable checklist of Surface Go’s external features.

But the Surface Go is tiny. It measures just 9.6 by 6.9 by .33 inches, with a 10-inch diagonal display. It also weighs 1.15 pounds. The first time I saw the Go, Natalia Urbanowicz, a product marketing manager at Microsoft, pulled the thing out of a 10-inch, leather, cross-body Knomo bag to show just how easily it can be tucked away. It's light enough to mistake for a notebook; the last time I felt that way about a computer was when Lenovo released the YogaBook back in 2016.

Ian C. Bates

The Go also happens to be the least expensive Surface ever. When it ships in early August, it will have a base price of $399. That’s for a configuration that includes 64 gigabytes of internal storage and 4 gigabytes of RAM, and ships with Windows 10 Home in S Mode (the S stands for “streamlined,” which means you can only download apps from the Windows Store). You’ll also have to shell out extra for a Type Cover keyboard and stylus pen.

From there, specs and prices creep up: A Surface Go with 256 gigabytes of storage, 8 gigabytes of RAM, and LTE will cost you more, though Microsoft hasn’t shared how much yet. All configurations have a microSD slot for additional storage too.

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The Surface Go is not the first 10-inch Surface that Panay and his team have shipped. The original Surface had a 10.6-inch display. And in 2015, Microsoft released the 10.8-inch Surface 3. It started at $499, and ran a “real” version of Windows, not Windows RT. But it was also underpowered; and, Panay admits now, it had an inelegant charging mechanism.

“To this day I regret the charging port on Surface 3,” Panay says. “I’d convinced myself that this ubiquitous USB 2.0 connector was going to solve the thing people asked me for: Can I just charge it with the charger I already have? And what I learned is that people want a charger with the device, they want a very seamless charging experience…I know that seems small, but I don’t think I can overstate that every single little detail can be a major difference maker.”

Panay says there’s been clear demand for a successor to the Surface 3, which would, by definition, have been the Surface 4. But “that evolution wasn’t right,” he says. “That would be too close to the original Surface Pro, and that’s not what this product should be at all.” Instead, he’s been noodling something like the Surface Go—codenamed “Libra”—for the past three years.

The new Surface Go benefits from all those learnings. It has the same Surface Connect port as the Pro lineup, along with a USB-C 3.1 port for data transfers and backup charging. It’s supposed to get around nine hours of battery life. It also runs on an Intel Pentium Gold processor. This is not one of Intel’s top-of-the-line Core processors, but it’s still a significant jump up from the Cherry Trail Atom processor in the Surface 3.

Pete Kyriacou, general manager of program management for Surface, says Microsoft has worked closely with Intel to tune the processor for this particular form factor. “If you compare the graphics here to the Surface Pro 3 running on an i5 [chip], it’s 33 percent better; and if you compare it to the i7, it’s 20 percent better,” Kyriacou says. “So we’re talking about Pentium processing, but, it’s better from a graphics perspective than a Core processor was just three years ago.”

A lot about the new Surface has been “tuned”—not just the guts of the Go, but its software, too. “We tuned Office, we then tuned the Intel part, we tuned Windows, we made sure that, in portrait, it came to life,” Panay says. “We brought the Cortana [team] in to better design the Cortana box—we went after the details on what we think our customers need at 10 inches.”

There’s usually a tradeoff when you’re buying a computer this small. You get portability at the expense of space for apps and browser windows. The Surface Go has a built-in scaler that optimizes apps for a 10-inch screen, and Microsoft says that it’s working with third-parties to make sure certain apps run great. There’s only so much control, though, you have over software that’s not your own. I was reminded of this when I had a few minutes to use the Surface Go, went to download the Amazon Kindle app in the Windows Store, and couldn’t find it there.

Making the Surface smaller was no small feat, according to Ralf Groene, Microsoft’s longtime head of design. Groene walks me through part of Building 87 on Microsoft’s campus, where the design studio is housed and where Groene’s team of 60 are tasked with coming up with a steady stream of ideas for potential products.

Ralf Groene, Microsoft’s head of design.

Ian C. Bates

Behind a door that says “Absolutely No Tailgating”—a warning against letting someone in behind you, not a ban on barbecues and cornhole—a small multimedia team makes concept videos. “Before products get made, we have a vision, we have an idea, and we express it in a video,” Groene tells me. If the video is received well by top executives, they know they have a winner. “Since there’s usually a timeline on how long processors are good for, we try to build as many iterations as possible of a product within that timeline.”

Once the Surface Go got the go ahead, Groene’s job became that of a geometrist: How do you fit all this stuff into a 9.6-inch enclosure? Going with magnesium again was an easy choice; it’s up to 36 percent lighter than aluminum, Groene says, and Microsoft has already invested in the machinery needed to work with magnesium. Some of the angles of the Go’s body are softer—Groene calls these “curvatures and radii”—making it more comfortable to hold close for extended time periods, like if you’re reading or drawing.

By far the biggest challenge was the Go’s Type Cover keyboard. The factor that always stays the same is the human, Groene says, and that includes fingers. Shrink a keyboard too much in your quest to make a laptop thin and light, and you’ll inevitably get complaints from people that their fingers are cramped, or that they land on each key with an unsatisfying thud. (Or worse, that the keyboard is essentially broken.)

The Go’s keyboard is undoubtedly smaller than the one that attaches to the Surface Pro. But it still has a precision glass trackpad, and a key travel that Groene says is fractionally less than the key travel on the Pro.

Ian C. Bates

Most notably, the Go’s keyboard uses a scissor-switch mechanism that was designed to give, as Groene describes it, the right “force to fire.” Each key is also slightly dished, a decision that Microsoft made after watching hours of footage of people typing, captured with a high-speed camera. The keys are supposed to feel plush and good under your fingers and not at all like a tiny accessory keyboard. (I only used the keyboard on the Go for a brief period of time, so I can’t really say what it would be like to use the keyboard to, say, type of a story of this length.)

I mention to Groene that Apple has long held the stance that touchscreens aren’t right for PC’s, something that Apple’s software chief Craig Federighi underscored in a recent WIRED interview when he said that they’re “fatiguing.” And yet, Microsoft is pretty committed to touchscreen PCs. What does Microsoft’s research show about how people use touchscreen PCs?

Groene first points out that the Surface laptop is the only one in Microsoft’s product line that has a classic laptop form factor and a touchscreen; the others are detachables, or, there’s the giant Surface Studio PC. But, more to the point, he says, “By offering multiple ways to get things done doesn’t mean that we add things. It’s not like the Swiss army knife, where every tool you put in makes it bigger.”

Sure, if you sit there for eight hours holding your arm up, it will get tired, Groene acknowledges. But that’s not the way people are supposed to use these things. “It’s the same thing with the pen. ‘We don’t need the pen because we are born with ten styluses,’” Groene says, wiggling his fingers, making an oblique reference to a well-known Steve Jobs quote about styluses. “However, having the tool of a pen is awesome when you want to go sketch something.”

“We are trying to design products for people,” he says, “and we don’t try to dictate how people use our devices.”

Ian C. Bates

So who is this tiny Surface Go actually made for? It depends on who you ask at Microsoft, but the short answer seems to be: anybody and everybody.

Urbanowicz, the product marketing manager, says Go is about “reaching more audiences, and embracing the word ‘and’: I can be a mother, and an entrepreneurial badass; I can be a student, and a social justice warrior.” Kyriacou, when describing the Go’s cameras, says to “think about the front line worker in the field—a construction worker, architect, they can capture what they need to or even scan a document.” You can also dock the Go, Kyriacou points out, using the Surface Connect port, which makes it ideal for business travelers. Groene talks about reading, about drawing, about running software applications like Adobe Photoshop and Illustrator. Almost everyone talks about watching Hulu and Netflix on it.

Panos Panay initially has a philosophical answer to this. It’s his “dream,” he says, to just get Surface products to more people. “I mean, that’s not my ultimate dream. But there are these blurred lines of life and work that are happening, and if you collect all that, Go was an obvious step for us.”

The evening before Panay and I chatted, he went to the Bellevue Square shopping center with his son, and at one point, had to pull out his LTE-equipped Surface Go to address what he said was an urgent work issue. His son asked if it was a new product, and Panay, realizing the blunder of having the thing out in public, tucked the Go in his jacket. To him, that’s the perfect anecdote: The lines between work and family time were blurred, he had to do something quickly, and when he was done, he could make his computer disappear.

Panos Panay, Microsoft’s chief product officer.

Ian C. Bates

Panay’s team also has a lot more insight into how people are using Surface products than it did eight years ago, he says, when Surface was still just a concept being developed in a dark lab. To be sure, Microsoft has been making hardware for decades—keyboards, mice, web cameras, Xbox consoles. But when Microsoft made the decision to start making its own PCs (and ultimately, take more control over how its software ran on laptops), it was a new hardware category for the company. It was a chance to get consumers excited about Microsoft again, not just enterprise customers.

The first few years of Surface were rocky. The first one, known as Surface RT, seems to be something that Microsoft executives would rather forget about; I don’t see it anywhere in the product lineups that Microsoft’s PR team has laid out ahead of my visit. Its 2012 launch coincided with the rollout of Windows 8, which had an entirely new UI from the previous version of Windows. It ran on a 32-bit ARM architecture, which meant it ran a version of the operating system called Windows RT. Depending on who you ask, the Surface RT was either a terrible idea or ahead of its time. (Panay says it was visionary.) Microsoft ending up taking a massive write-down on it the following year.

Since then, Microsoft has rolled out a series of Surface products that, due to the company’s design ethos, a newer operating system, and plain old Moore’s Law, have only gotten better. In 2013 it introduced the Surface Pro line, which are still detachables, but are built to perform like a premium laptop and can cost anywhere from $799 to $2,600. There’s the Surface Book line; the Surface Book 2 starts at $1,199 and clocks in around 3.5 pounds, making it a serious commitment of a laptop. The Surface Studio is a gorgeous, $2,999, all-in-one desktop PC, aimed at creative types. The Surface Laptop is Microsoft’s answer to Apple’s MacBook Air. It starts at $799, and got largely positive reviews when it launched last year.

Even still, Microsoft’s Surface line has struggled to make a significant dent in the market for personal computing. HP and Lenovo dominate the broader PC market, while Apple leads in the tablet category (including both detachables and slate tablets).“From a shipment perspective, the entire Surface portfolio has been fairly soft,” says Linn Huang, an IDC research director who tracks devices and displays. “It was growing tremendously, and then the iPad Pro launched and Surface shipments have either been negative, year-over-year, for the past several quarters, or flat.”

Microsoft has new competition to worry about, too: Google’s inexpensive Chromebooks, which in a short amount of time have taken over a large share of the education market.

“Do I think about Chromebooks? Absolutely,” Panay says, when I ask him about them. “Do I think about iPads? Absolutely. I use multiple devices. It’s exhausting. But this product is meant to bring you a full app suite.” Panay is highlighting one of the drawbacks of lightweight Chromebooks: Their lack of local storage. Meanwhile, he says, Surfaces are designed to let people be productive both locally on the device, and in the cloud when they need to work in the cloud.

And, while Panay says he’s keeping an eye on Chromebooks, he insists that Microsoft didn’t build Go to compete with Chromebooks. That said, Surface Go will have a school-specific software option: IT administrators for schools can choose whether they want a batch of Go’s imaged with Windows 10 Pro Education, or Windows 10 S mode-enabled.

Panay wouldn’t comment on Microsoft’s plans for the future beyond Surface Go, although there have long been rumors of a possible Microsoft handheld device, codenamed Andromeda. If the Surface Go is something of a return to a smaller, 10-inch detachable, then a pocketable device that folds in half, one that could potentially run on an ARM processor, would be something of a return to mobile for Microsoft. Qualcomm has also been making mobile chips that are designed to compete directly with Intel’s Core processors for PCs.

For now, though, Panay is throwing all his chips behind the Surface Go, and making a big bet that this little device is the one that will make the masses fall in love with Surface. He tends to chalk up past Surface products, even the ones that didn’t do well, as simply before their time. Now, with the Go, he says, “it’s time.”

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