#but thats the thing; its Not meant to be for me its meant to be for yourself and your peers
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ill make a seperate post with the non-professional advice i give anyone with mental illness (active or history of) that is seeing a physical medical doctor. because this post ended up pretty long.
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this is about some of our experiences of mental health issue affecting physical health care. as well as our physical health conditions affecting/interacting with our mental health conditions.
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forewarning, it is a very long read. i tried to condense it, but i struggle to do that.
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ooph, this shit is so true. although i do think there's a good amount of truth in neurosciences, i just think there are alot of /neurologists/ specifically that are shams, or at least extremely biased and prejudiced about alot of things. neurologists also seem to have the biggest ego of all specialists drs ive seen.
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i have a couple genetic disorders, which like i have the clinical profiles for and also have genetic tests that match. but only after alot of years of progressively getting worse and going to so many doctors to try to find out why. i actually had to do a bunch of research when i could, even analysed my raw dna data from an ancestry test, found a specialist in the suspected disorders, and got a very clear clincal diagnosis, then got official WGS testing to further confirm that.
so my self-diagnosis was right for a good couple of my disorders actually, but most were diagnosed by others after the other diagnoses were confirmed.
(like evidence of one phsyical disorder made other drs start to take my other symptoms seriously thankfully, bc now it was less likely to be mental illness/conversion symptoms in their eyes.)
but one of the /very first diagnosis/ that a neurologist tried to give me was Functional Neurological Disorder (which i do think is understood to be a bit different now than conversion syndrome, but to most drs it meant the same thing back then. even now, alot of doctors use FND and conversion disorder interchangeably, they think FND is just conversion disorder but "rebranded" so there's less pushback about a diagnosis, which isnt true.)
but FND is a diagnosis of exclusion. thank fuck my moms knowledgeable about stuff and said "no, you cannot diagnose my child that from one conversation and zero tests except routine labs, thats only by exclusion. you have done no tests to investigate their symptoms." so it never was an offical dx, but it was in the doctors notes still, which follow me to other doctors unfortunately.
it should never be the first thing a neurologist diagnoses or suggests to someone. he probably tried to for me because i was on medicine for anxiety depression and OCD, and was having alot of neurological symptoms.
(he also tried to say all my decline, daily headaches and constant migraines id developed after a TBI was just "post concussion syndrome" and "stress", but it was still going on 4+ years at that point. we had no idea PCS is not supposed to last that long, and trusted him about that at least. but when i had to switch drs, my new neurologist was actually /appalled/ the previous one didnt do further tests, or even get an updated MRI. he honestly seemed in disbelief that the old dr was trying to tell us it was "totally normal" to still be so affected after so long, let alone be having a decline as well.)
id literally had to stop my OCD meds very abruptly and have awful withdraws because he (the old negligent neurolgist) refused to do any further testing until i stopped that medicine (without consulting a psychiatrist even, he just said i had to stop it. such such dangerous and reckless doctor advice/order).
i was progressively declining and having alot of seizures and different dangerous medical events. so i stopped it and suffered bad withdraws ontop of everything else that was happening, went back to him, just for him to say it mustve been stress still, i was "stressed".
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"its stress" is a dr code phrase for "i dont have any idea whats happening with this patient but my ego will never let me admit that, so im going to blame the patient and say its all anxiety".
alot of drs wont admit if they dont know something. but all of my good drs, who have actually been investigating things and gotten to the bottom of a couple of my disorders, have admitted that because im a complex case, they dont know which issues are being caused by what.
they do tests to rule out or confirm major issues and then we try meds/treatments for various things to see if they help to try and find origins. and sometimes we just wont know what a symptom is from, but the goal is to find ways to improve my quality of life and capabilities, while doing frequent testing to keep an eye on the issue. like, all my best drs put their egos aside and say "lets investigate together".
i have been failed in alot of ways by the medical systems and doctors, but i have also had good drs and recieved alot of help as well.
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but alot of that good help, only came after advocating and fighting like hell for my symptoms to be investigated properly. after doing a fuck-ton of research myself because the system was failing me and i was dying (literally), then finding a specialist in what i suspected was my main issue. they investigated and tested for it properly, then gave me a clincial diagnosis, then "proof" of the disorder via genetic testing later on.
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im actually lucky in the sense that i actually have some known variants. because a couple of my genetic disorders dont always have known variants found yet, and despite myself having a very clear clincal profile, some doctors didnt even want to "accept" the diagnosis i was given, until they saw a clear genetic marker. even though i was diagnosed already, it was always "patient suspects ____ disorder, still awaiting WGS test to confirm.", "patient has concerns of ___ disorder, no genetic testing done yet.", "patients claims was diagnosed with ____, but no genetic testing done."
if my doctors hadnt been refusing to treat me for my other disorders, "until genetic tests come back", then i wouldnt have tried to get testing, because alot of drs who specialize in this disorder advocate for patients to NOT get testing, because even if someone has a clear clinical diagnosis and treatments are helping, if genetic results come back negative some doctors will take away the clinical diagnosis, stop treatments, and slap a conversion/FND label on them. then the patient doesnt improve because they dont have that, they have a genetic disorder with an un-found variant.
like, im talking about a disorder that the vast majority of people who have it, DO NOT have an identified variant, and it has clear clinical diagnostic requirements, which i fit. its not a diagnosis of exclusion, i fit the clinical tests and profiles, but so many doctors wouldnt accept my diagnosis unless i had a genetic test showing positive.
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from the time of clinical diagnosis to actually getting testing was a little over 4 years, and my other doctors were all still treating my very real, very clear clincal diagnosis as if i was just suspecting it. so everything, all treatments except for PT (which always made me worse, which is a known thing with my disorder) and some of the meds i was already on, was being delayed and put into limbo, of "lets wait for the genetic test first", even things unrelated to that diagnosis.
everyone said i needed WGS before anything else, but insurance wouldnt cover it, even with appeals, and fighting for so many years for it. so i had to try and save for it myself which is crazy hard when you're disabled with no income. while saving up, we were still trying to get insurance to cover it.
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so in this circumstance, thank fuck i actually had some known variants! because if i hadnt? i honestly would be dead. and i firmly believe that would be due to medical negligence and malpractice. which i also firmly believe was rooted in mental illness stigma, and stigma/bias due to the fact that an abuser was intefering with my health care (still is actually) by calling doctors offices and telling them that i have munchausens and/or by proxy.
(which i consider this to still be a mental health stigma/bias issue, not a genuine concern, bc alot of the tests and diagnoses i had are not something that someone can fake??? so seeing those shouldve made drs not take my abuser's words seriously, had they not been so biased about it, had it not clouded their judgment so much.)
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also, on the topic of phsyical abilities affecting mental health:
ooph i also have alot to say about that, in particular how my disabilities affect my OCD, and sometimes needing other people to engage in my compulsions for me, which sounds really weird when i word it like that.
and often i cant engage in some compulsions, or others cant get things "just right" for me, thats a major theme/pattern for my OCD. so ive basically been getting exposure therapy more and more as my physical abilities declined. and its awful awful for both me and my caregivers/helpers when im trying to convey while very stressed the exact way they need to place something or do something, etc. and when im overhwlemed or dysregulated (like how OCD can cause) then im very prone to meltdowns and to speech loss episodes as well, which then interferes with being able to communicate what i need in that moment too.
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and needing help requires so much vulnerability, often i have people willing to help. safe people, who i love and the logical part of me knows would never actually hurt me. but with traumas and triggers, sometimes i just dont shower, or dont change my clothes, or i hold my urine in, or dont do some other things if i require help.
(and having experiences that match a PDA autism profile, whether from trauma or autism or a mix of both idk. can make all that worse too. i deny my own needs, even when i can do them, because my body is trying to demand it from me, which feels like a threat to my autonomy and choices.)
on the phsyical capabilities level though, i try to wait it out as long as i can until i can muster the energy and abilities to do something myself, or until i cant wait longer and need help. ill try to orient myself to remind i am safe, and sometimes just have to face those emotions, face those triggers.
i know that sounds bad, and i mean it is bad. i dont want to downplay it too much, but i also think its a fairly normal response to the things have have happened to me, and the loss of control my illnesses cause/create/exacerbate.
i have all the supports in place to be able to recieve that help, im often needing that help, but i need to try to hold onto control and autonomy as much as possible that id rather be lacking in my hygeine (especially bc im not even leaving the house or being very active to get sweaty or gross), or have abdominal pain from holding urine/bowel movements in, than traumatize myself if i might just be able to wait a longer until i have the ability to transfer myself and clean myself.
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my mental illnesses and PTSD affect my willingness to recieve the help from safe and well meaning people even when i do need it. and that then further can affect my mental and/or phsyical health.
like, its just a really shitty situation, that im still trying to learn the best way to cope with. trying to find the best way to let myself recieve help. to let myself to vulnerable, to truly /feel/ that its safe to ask for help even. not logically know, but actually feel it.
thankfully, my main caregiver is respectful of my "no's", and even if shell emphasize if i need to shower, check ive ate or drank water, and offer me help if i need it, she respects when i say "i need help but i dont want it, ill let you know when it gets to the point you need to be hands-on."
shes well meaning, but we still have some communication issues, especially when i have alot more speech issues, and can struggle to communicate to her.
i often think others can read my mind, not in the delusion way, but in the sense that i assume others can read my body lanaguge (even when im not being physically expressive, flat face, etc), and that the way i feel and the things i need are just already understood by others.
and i dont always realize how different some of my thinking patterns/needs are from others as well, and assume they experience some of the same things, so they are just automatically understand.
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and ive had multiple instances now, when i was having anaphalaxis, but have traumas around needles i cant control (and auto injectors count as a needle i cant control). ive had to wait until i was too incapacitated from an allergic reaction, to have my mom inject me with an epipen.
i am mentally incapable of injecting an auto injector, and will physically resist when capable too even if i want the epinephrine. i can get really severe flashbacks just /thinking/ about needles being inside me. i cannot get the body to do it.
so, i have given prior consents for her to be able to inject me with an epipen if im having really bad reactions even if i say no. but she has had to wait until im too weak or sick, or just dissociated and disconnected and in fawn/flop/freeze rather than fight/flight, to inject me.
so its at least not too bad of a trauma, but it is still extremely traumatic. to need that, and to need someone i love and feel safe with, need to be the person that injects that needle i cant control.
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well, this was a very long responses. seems when i do post, i write alot. i can struggle to condense and summarize things well, so i apologize if there was too many details or words.
just writing to the void of the internet, a world of strangers and bots. so if feels like i can be more open i think.
i cant speak for everyone but i feel like it's underrated just how much impact being physically disabled has on mental health. because physically disabled people often have to remind others that we struggle with mental health issues that it sometimes sounds like an afterthought to others. but it's a real impact of being physically disabled. being unable to go outside or leave the bed worsens depression. having actively declining health worsens depression because part of depression is being unable to imagine a future for yourself. it also creates anxiety. you have to rely on people. on carers, family, the government. it's hard to assure anxiety when you are in a precarious position and the "worst case scenario" is not something you can circumvent or deal with, because lack of care will kill you. has killed people like you. being told you are worthless, that people like you should die or never live in the first place has a big impact on mental health. being physically disabled and unable to defend yourself, being forced to rely on people, opens up a lot of opportunities for abuse and trauma. being in pain is traumatic, medical procedures may be traumatic - and being a disabled child leads you to be doubly vulnerable. people often have to focus on their physical needs to keep them alive - to keep them clean and fed and such. and with such little energy to spare it is difficult to manage mental health. all the stigma surrounding mental health doesn't disappear because you're already disabled. sometimes when you do reach out people will just focus on trying to make you less disabled in order to cure the mental illness issue, instead of giving you the tools to help manage it in your current and real life.
#physical symptoms mentioned#physical illness mentions#tw doctors#doctors#cussing#tw needles#needles#epipen#physical disability#mental health#mental illness#ptsd#complex dissociative disorder#tw medical#actually ocd#just right ocd#pure ocd#obsessive compulsive disorder#erp therapy#autism#pda#pda autism#intersectionality#struggles with speech#did system#im so grateful for my mom#pf did#semiverbal autistic#functional neurological disorder#medical negligence
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kind of feeds into your jimmy ecosystem idea that on impossible minecraft he is lowkey thriving and not dying the most by a long shot. like on the server thats supposedly SUPER difficult to survive on, and all the environmental factors want to kill you, he's doing well because the OTHER PEOPLE are meant to be working together.... and the most deaths he's had at one time so far was when another player was actively targeting him for their entertainment (grian).
like idk man! jimmy isnt bad at the game nor is he more suseptable to dying! its literally the people around him that turn him into a self-fulfilling prophesy by not believing in him and sabotaging him!
SPEAK YOUR TRUTH!! SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK!! This is one of the reasons I'm really enjoying Impossible SMP despite it being so far detached from what usually gets me invested in mcyt content. He is absolutely the person most people would expect to die the most alongside Skizz and he doesn't. Do you ever think about how he was the only one not to die in the nether until Grian persuaded him into trying to save him from a Blaze. Because I do
The ecosystem takes a backseat because everyone is fighting for their lives on a constant basis, not just Jimmy (via other people making his environment more difficult to thrive in) and it really puts things into perspective seeing how he's getting by so much better now. Justice and peace and love for Jimmy
#blabber#solidaritygaming#I dont dare to maintag usually but I need the Jimmy positvity out there. he is so good and compent
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A thanks to critical role
Disclaimer: english is not my native language and i dont mean to ignore certain people or groups of people, i just cant rhime as well as Sam, this is just meant as a nice thank you. I wrote this myself but i was inspired by sams poëm so certain word 'rythems' may be very similar. This is a thank you to critical role, as a reaction to sams poëm he did in c2 (look it up, itll make you cry in the good way) Anyways because its critmas enjoy:
I know sam’s poëm cant be upstaged
But I wan’t still want to try, and no i dont want to rage
Because we should all be kind to eachother
And sometimes also help one another
But thats not why im adding this bit
Im just waiting for the right words to fit
Cause i want to remind the critical role cast
You didnt mention you when saying thanks, please dont put yourselves last
We al live by the content you make and inspire
Honestly, watching all your shows is my only desire
So this is a big thanks from all of the critters
From spellcasters, poëts and also hard-hitters
So next time you ask yourself: is it Thursday yet?
The anwser is yes, for us it can be Thursday whenever wherever, on any continent
We love and adore you, all the critters together, you and me
And every Thursday we watch a bunch of nerdy-ass voice-actors play DnD.
Thanks for reading this whole thing, i may turn this into nice lettering with horrible art later but for now i am just gonna enjoy critmas
Remember to love eachother and have a merry critmas!
#critical role#marisha ray#laura bailey#matt mercer#sam riegel#travis willingham#liam o'brien#ashley johnson#taliesin jaffe#poem#critmas#my writing
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in spite of everything, I had fun <3
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#jjk leaks#yuji itadori#fushiguro megumi#nobara kugisaki#itafushikugi#jjk 271#well we made it :'>#im kind of ignoring a lot of the tag rn ghsdff ik people are upset#if u follow me u know th full extent of my thoughts on the wrapping up of the series but tl;dr the caption says it all#this series meant a lot to me and im working on a bigger tribute to fully express that love and gratitude#but take a redraw 2 tide u over for now#im just so happy. its bittersweet but those r my kids n theyre tgt and theyre okay#i think the return to normalcy is good fr them. i say let them rest n b together n process everything in time#/i'm/ satisfied with what i got out of jjk as a whole and that's all that matters to me#however ik that not everyone shares tht sentiment n thats valid!#regardless of how u feel abt the finale i hope that u at least take time to remember things abt the series that brought u joy#thats all i can say#oh yeah anyway i lightened up megumi's expression his face is so funny in that panel i can't believe he really said -_- until the very end#still tho i think megu deserves a content lil smile
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This is exactly what NASA and space exploration agency's are not meant to do and is part of why people insisting spaceX is better than NASA because "cheaper" drives me up the fucking wall.
As you just said, we know a bunch of stuff about the moon. So why would you want to send a data collecting probe there? Its a waste of resources. NASA is supposed to explore and make discoveries about our cosmos. Not bring a bunch of minerals back from the moon to make profit.
And this is not even mentioning the fact that mining minerals from other planets and moons is disastrous for international relations. Space is a neutral zone and the second one nation starts taking resources from it, you end up with a massive race to colonize space and take resources. Thats just going to become a massive mess I dont want to even consider.
When doing a space mission the last thing you want to consider is how to turn a profit from it. Thats for a business to do, not a space agency. If youre making a space mission the main things you want to do are make it cheap and figure out how to get the most information possible from the mission, whether it be from developing new tech or from data collected.
Bit of a different ask:
If you were in charge of NASA or another space agency, what places would you want to send a space probe to first?
ive recently been radicalized on this by kyplanet, the moon. its right there, it's rich in minerals and has no ecosystem to disrupt, building and launching rockets from the moon will be vastly cheaper than launching them from earth due to lower gravity and no atmosphere, you don't need to expose workers to low gravity & radiation for too long because it's right there and they can be shipped back to earth, the earth's moon would be the ideal target even if we lived on venus. it's just a win win win win win win win win.
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Being someone who read Under The Red Hood and came out with the firm belief that, for Jason, it's not about killing Joker, it's about Jason wanting proof Batman would choose him over the Joker (bc shelia chose the joker). Makes seeing any other media where it's all about just wanting the Joker dead is a teeny bit frustrating. to be honest
Jason could've killed the Joker himself, really, really easily. Jason kidnaps the Joker before the confrontation. I can't open my comic for a reference right now, but it felt like he had the Joker for quite a bit before the confrontation. He had him. He beat him up with a crowbar. He had every single opportunity to kill the Joker himself, but he didn't because that wasn't his goal. Make no mistake, he did plan for the Joker to be dead by the end of it, but do you see what im trying to say here
Edit: If I knew this post was gonna get 1000+ notes I would've tried to word it better or something, this was a rant I made on the way to the grocery store 😭
It's not about making Batman kill either. When Batman says he won't kill, Jason adjusts and goes, 'Let ME kill the Joker or kill me to stop me' instead. The test is all about Batman choosing him. The whole final confrontation is Jason's first death again. The parent, The Joker, and the explosives. It even ends with Jason unable to move as a bomb goes off right next to him again because the parent didn't choose Jason. And instead tried finding an option that'd benefit them and (consequencely) letting the Joker walk, again, lol, lmao <-in agony
#the final confrontation was basically his first death again#and YES he Does want the Joker dead#and it would've been really really nice if Batman was the one who did it#but when batman made it clear he wouldn't kill the joker. Jason easily switched to saying “LET me kill the joker” to accommodate#because he Wanted batman to pass his test#he gave a test to dick too. and technically tim but it wasnt the family test it was a different one so it doesnt rly count#AFTER utrh and the reveal and the batarang you can go hog wild about it. i care less about it then#granted i do believe they make jason more scared of the joker after it at some point#i guess because hes a bit too willing to kill the joker and ive heard jason wasnt meant to live after utrh#my watsonian explain for that is he was so fixated on his plan he cpuld override his fear. or maybe the pit. either work#i prefer the fixation bc i dont like the explanation that the pit was the /only/ reason he could get all plan together and done#BUT THATS UNRELATED!!!#dc stop putting the joker in jason stories im begging you please please please. lock him in a vault for the next 20 years or something#it Cpuld be good and i understand. but also. after so long of people that dont know or go for jasons need for family and parents#that love him and he can trust#the joker starts to feel like?? hm. words. a cop out? oh haha its that guy that killed him woagh hes here#i bet you dont even know that jaybin got beat until unconsciousness by an angry mob#while asking batman to save him only for batman to have to walk away#anwya. where was i going with this#i think i got off topic#jason todd#dc comics#batman#ADDED AN EDIT. SORRY. this post has been haunting me it keeps me awake. what if people misunderstand#they cant read my tags where i ramble more depth. thisbis the only option#EDIT EDIT: hiii#removed the sentence abt jason having the joker for several days bc i misremembered some things#go read its-your-mind 's addition instead also#ok no more i wont edit this post anymore i promise
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His heart belongs to another
And no other heart will do
#no other heart by mac demarco : D#I drew this a couple of days ago because i was feeling crazy and i just love the idea that#these two should be great together!! they should!!! but#theyre not together#theres just . theyre missing something#and thats okay!!! its not meant to be#and theyre friendship is very valuble to both of them!!#their* fuck my baka keyboard#trolls#yall are gonna be mad about this one i feel it ...#i think we all know who jds gonna end up with now right ...#i just gotta .. draw them more 💀#i actully have the perfect ruveal i just have to finish painting it#urrgg i HATE painting#trolls oc#trolls oc cory#trolls movie#trolls john dory#trolls jd#john dory#jd ex husband#oh uhh i imagine this feels like a new years thing. or something#something that happened like right after they reconnected#before floyd and cory started going out#on god one day im gonna put all my tags lore into a post#i just shy 😔 who wants to read all this in a caption#not me brother!! I'm not reblogging that shit!!!#and im not finishing this cause i dont wanna give false hope 😘#although jd dating sim ... is pretty real#i would love to do endings with all his exs
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It has come to my attention that people who haven't read the comics don't realise Wallace was the one who harassed scott into being his friend. Like he saw that nerd at uni and went oh yeah that's my guy now. This bitch would not shut up and showed up at his house uninvited to hang out till scott gave in and befriended him, then they got suuuper drunk and scott let him crash at his. He comes to family dinners, is best friends with his sister, and chats to his mum.
He despises envy more than anything and is furious when she tries to mess with his life again and scott gets hurt, so he cooks him breakfast and comforts him. He coaches scott in fighting and helps with strategies so he doesn't get his ass kicked. He bullies him to leave the house because there's a heatwave and he wants to make sure he doesn't get heatstroke. Like they're close enough Wallace walks around in his underwear (though scott whines about it).
I've seen people assume Wallace supports scott out of pity but that man is a bitch and morally questionable (affectionate), I do not think he would put up with it at all if he didn't want him around, especially given he can barely afford to support them both. When they stop living together he doesn't just kick him out it's because their landlord kicks them out, he actively enchorages scott to move in with Ramona out of care for him and offers to stay with him if he needs it, though ends up signing a lease with his boyfriend (in his defence scott didn't ask for him to stay and decided to try make things work with Ramona) but still let's him stay at the new apartment with them when Ramona kicks him out.
Yeah he's mean to scott sometimes and makes fun of him/is brutally honest but he basically became part of Scott's family and part of that is calling people out when they're being a total jackass and teasing them, he's that kinda guy and scott knows that he doesn't actually hate him or something. Yeah scott will do puppy dog eyes if he wants something but wallace is frequently nice to him on his own initiative and scotts not a suck up to Wallace, he can be a bitch right back at him.
They're a really important part of each other's lives. though I can understand people not familiar with the characters who watched the show thinking Wallace doesn't care about scott being gone, literally all the characters reacted super casually. Bryan has tried to clarify his way of trying to cope is him "being a jerk"/disconnecting/acting apathetic. Also in the show o'malley basically confirms Wallace had feelings for scott and that was why he had the affair with Todd and you can quote him on that, aswell as scott admitting how they became roomates was "somewhat gay" in the comics, so there's definitely some weird more than friends emotional mess tied in there.
comic panels i reference under the cut
TLDR wallace lives with him because he cares about him, whether you read that as still somewhat romantic or now platonic, with either interpretations fitting better with different versions of the story
#scott pilgrim#this comic means a lot to me if you cant tell#it made me less scared of growing up reading it for the first time in middle school and countless times since#because it makes it clear that yes scott starts off as an immature selfish self centered asshole#it is made very clear and if the reader still idolises him imo it is 100% on them and a reflection of them as a person#but the comics give him the time and care to give him real character development and shows him realising all the shitty things he's done#he learns from and owns up to and faces his mistakes and in turn matures as a person#and I know mid 20's isn't old but to 13 yr old me I was supposed to have my shit together by 18 man#so seeing him be shitty and fail as an adult and still become a better person meant I wasn't doomed if I messed up#also that relationships suck sometimes and thats ok#you can fix it or move on#anyway#ig this includes scollace ?#scollace#wallace wells#hi its me
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all you ever need is to be nice and friendly
#undescribed#bonk.png#great god grove#ggg#great god grove spoilers#ggg spoilers#first thing is like that post thats like ''making my fav do community service so i can enjoy them uncritically'' bc i think its funny#n SOMEONE is gonna have to clean up all the inspekta merch also gave him a gay little ponytail bc i had trouble with his hair#second thing is supposed to be that image thats a lady in heels standing ontop of a guy so she can get to the higher shelves in a store#but i COULDNT find it also thats meant to be vib stepping on capo but i didnt draw it too clearly tbh#third thing its not meant to be like genuine shippy rick's response to if u use the blush line on him is like a very specific thing of#romantic relationships not as connection but as a status symbol a material good to show you've made it a prize to show off#which is like catnip to me n also extremely not that deep within the game bc its entirely optional n goes nowhere but OUGHHHH.......#i have. a kajillion thoughts related to that kind of stuff but i dont have the words rn so i will say that in the unlikely scenario they did#get married i dont think they'd even live together or go on dates or anything its a relationship defined by being absent n squeaky clean#godpoke is in a wedding dress bc to me relationships that are a performance go hand in hand with forced conformity n closingoff authenticity#they get to be the bride bc rick is already the groom their face is hidden by a veil bc it doesnt particularly matter that its them#n the little crown holding it is mean to resemble the clippy part of the clipboard whats underneath the paper is irrelevant#theres more but again i dont have the brain for it rn#fourth thing ouppy ^w^ also related to the caption bc its just a line from my fav song from the first game
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got this reblog on one of my posts were i talked about being anxious about the future of the zelda series after totk and-
i even went back and unblocked them just to check my own post and check twice what they meant exactly- but i still dont know how they got to these conclusions
i never said i 'want a good uwu ganondorf' (bc that would mean hes aligned with hyrule bc thats how goodness works!!!!11!1!!!), i also dont think of any of the zeldas as 'whores' (seriously, where did that come from?? neither me nor the addition of someone agreeing with me said anything like that??? did they think bc the addition called tloz misogynistic means we think zelda is a whore????? huh???)
its also funny how they say they want zelda to stay a simple fairytale rather than have 'people like me' bc .. one point i talked about in the og post was how the evil arab thing VS good white people media likes to do so much is so normalized here that its simply seen as a simple harmless fairytale trope instead of a big underlying issue in general media and the writers might not even realize it (which is worse) bc the most 'generic' appeal is to people who dont think of it as a problem in the first place, because it is so normalized
(huh, i wonder about what kind of person that part was about .. hmmmm)
(ALSO funny they mention princess hilda as nuanced villain ... like ... wow they are so nuanced about purple haired people!!- like guess why we want a nuanced/less badly/less flat written ganondorf and what he, in particular, has not in common with other villains! its not his hair color! .... or was that point supposed to mean .. look we have one female character that is a villain, its not misogynistic! idk honestly)
(and the classic, "you just call it this/dont like it bc its not what you wanted !!!!!!!2!"1!112!!")
also funny how its 'never gonna be progressive enough' like asking for the franchise to maybe put a little more thought and nuance into their white divine right vs evil desert man simulator instead of making it worse is already asking too much
(i dont know what the last point has to do with anything??)
(also yes totk is racist, like most if not all of the franchise and a alot of other media as well, shocker- you can still like it though, i and plenty of other people are still fans of it, we just wish they did a little more with their stuff and maybe not make the racism problem WORSE)
(also yes the hyrule monarchy is also evil :))) )
(and also not so secretly so either :)) )
#ganondoodles talks#zelda#ganondoodles rants#ganondorf#wanted to search my blog for the post at first and tumblr showed me two posts and their reblogs#i have so many more posts in this tag#the fuck#.....im sorry to all the zelink shippers with a brain but i cant say im surprised that they were one#i could go through every point in their addition but tbh its not worth any more of my time really#needed to say something though bc .....#yeah no wonder nintendy dont have to put any work into their story if thats how some people react to mild criticism of it lol#who are you fighting for little man?#defending the big corporation from mild criticism from people that want the media they produce to be better??#....... in the end i kinda did go into every point#or what point i thought they were trying to make which ... was rather unclear to me#anyway#wild to come across people like that here#only had one other i can remember but they went straight to insults lol#(was there ever a divine prophecy that said only gan can be king??? how was urbosa or riju on the throne then??-#(wait was that meant as “see? the gerudo have the divine right thing too!! samey as hyrule so they not bad!!”#i am genuinely so confused
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."Are you even listening to me, McCullum?".
#jonathan reid#geoffrey mccullum#mcreid#vampyr#vampyr 2018#mccreid#vampyr game#mxm#geoffrey x jonathan#jonathan x geoffrey#sketch#.you can basically make any HIM song fit these two jsyk.#.idk why i thought of geoffrey reading vampire fanfiction but here we are anyway.#.probably bc of that hc about dorian reading qunari pirate fanfics and being all 👀👀👀👀 hello!#.AGAIN sorry still obsessed but if yall got any stupid things u wanna share w me go ahead.#.idk if its better if theyre already a thing in this or not lmao but THATS UP TO YOUUUUUU byebye.#.meant to say seathrun is the Irish version of Geoffrey.#.like irl I know brothers called Vladimir and George so Geoffrey should totally have a proper Irish name that was anglicised.#. Just for the English or something ykno.
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can I hug the narrator? I’ve had a shitty week :(
P.S: tell him I love his voice 🥰
#android’s insides#the stanley parable#the stanley parable art#the stanley parable fanart#tsp fandom#tsp art#tsp fanart#the stanley parable narrator#tsp narrator#thats you btw#It's meant to be silly I swear!!#I typically don't skip around as I like to answer them in order they're received but this one felt a tad urgent#I'm very sorry you had a bad week but hey; it's over now and next week may be better!#I know its an awfully Sisyphus way to think about things but it's gotten me through#we're both still kicking so we must be doing something right ey?
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"I think this is the most inhuman; and human, that I've ever felt.." MUCH CAN HAPPEN IN A YEAR. IN FIVE YEARS. A DECADE. imagine how much can happen in a century. just ONE (1). How will you grow? what phases do you find? even in 5 years, you will find patterns.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#jrwi suckening spoilers#jrwi the suckening#arthur bennett#HEY SO THE REALLY FUNNY THING THAT THE CHARACTER DID THAT SEEMED RLY SILLY N GOOFY IN THE MOMENT?#LIKE THE WHIPLASH BETWEEN SERIOUS N SILLY ALMOST PISSED YOU OFF? WHAT IF I FOUND A WAY TO MAKE YOU SAD ABOUT IT#this was meant to be a scribble that would be a bigger part of a bigger page.might leave it on that page.#but still. bc o that i nearly posted it onto my wacky side blog.BUT NAYY I SPENT TOO MUCH TIME N ENERGY N YOU GOTTA SEE IT#ARTHUR BENNETT DRIVES ME CRAZY. I FEEL LIKE ITS ODD FOR HIM TO BE SO TECHNOLOGICALLY OUT OF TOUCH#WHERE HAS HE BEEN. HAS HE BEEN IN WAR? IS THAT WHERE MAGNUS CAME FROM? WHERE WAS HE WHEN HE WAS WITH EDWARDS CREW?#ARTHURRR I HAVE QUESTIONS ARTTHUUURR!! HEY CAN I ALSO ASK; WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU BECOME#DO YOU THINK HE HAD ANY IDEA HE WOULD VEER CLOSER AND CLOSER TO THE MONSTER HE DESPISES. ALL BC HE DESERVES IT. OR WATEVER#HE FASCINATES ME SO MUCH. TO LOOK AT THE STONE COLD STOIC FOOL FROM THE START OF THE SHOW#AND TO FIND OUT THAT HE USED TO BE A BAD BOY.. A DELINQUENT... A LIL PRANKSTER.... MY GODDD THATS ADORABLE#I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW MORE.... BUT I DOUBT THE LAST EPISODE IS GONNA ANSWER THOSE QUESTIONS..i love arthur bennett so much....#AS FOR THE ART!! i mostly used the fire alpaca watercolor brush. tbh im not a brush guy. anti aliased default pen tends to be my main game#but LATELY IM SQQQUIRMIN OUT OF AN ARTBLOCK so expirimenting like this is helping#DONT LOOK TOO HARD AT IT!! im still proud tho. colors are fun :3 im also very proud of the backgrounds#I LOVE THE CARTOON THING where the background looks all fancy n painted but the characters are solid colors#what else can i ramble abt. OH YEAH. i looked up the bikes to make sure they were time accurate tehehehe. 1913 to 2012.#almost a century apart!! isnt that neat? ALSO FUUUCK CAN I JUST MAKE A QUICK CONFESSION. DOWN HERE IN MY TAGS.#only the strongest can read my tags anwyay. SO I REALIZED WHY I LOVE ARTHUR SO MUCH. TIME IS A FLAT CIRCLE#while arthur is a Stoic and Cool vampire w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORs#THERE HAPPENS TO BE A ROBOT FROM A BAND W A TITANIUM ALLOY SPINAL COLLUMN#WHOS A Stoic and Cool ROBOT w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORS#the fuckkkiiinnngggnn The Spine from steam powered giraffe. WHATEVER. i cant escape from my heart. i guess.#i think The Spine and Arthur could be friends. Arthur saw the band perform back when they were the Steam Man Band#EDIT: WOOPS I DIDNT REALIZE THIS WOULD END UP IN THE SPG TAG. HI GUYS DIDNT KNOW U WERE STILL ALIVE SORREE 4 THE CROSS CONTAMINATION
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Samurai and Ninja in crappy pics because December here is under a constant cloud and I just want y'all to see them all golden and cute without learning how to take aesthetic pictures 🥴 💙❤️😆🥰
linktr.ee/Mezzy
#klance#can i tell everyone to look away before i write tags to someone privately lmao no? damn#anyway yes i meant music!! and thank you for sharing something!!#baking seems like a hyperfixation#like i know you said you baked once but then look at me#...i was thinking if i could make salads.... i gotta be medicore at least at one food thing#its a joke its a joke#i will one day get used to focusing on more complicated kitchen work than heating up meat or cooking things in salt and water#anyone else had trouble getting out of bed this december?#once i do i try to pick physical activities that dont require creative thinking because man#at the post office i had small talk with a lady waiting in line she didnt speak polish so u know me it happened#and she recommended light therapy lamp#im very tempted to try it becase i had record bad thoughts sleepless nights and jerking awake this month#it might be rooted in economic instability growing inflation costs of living and shitty working conditions while still trying to buy gifts?#but hey there are things we cant have control over and there are things we can#ive got winter wonderland comic coming though#i will try my best to speed-finish it as a christmas gift aight#i hope its going to be a nice thing!!#wow thats a long set of tags
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Something something it's a metaphor. Hair as a form of communication but also as passage of time and also as a way for letting people in and also as a detail etc etc you get it
Actual explanation in the tags btw
I'm really nervous about this comic actually, is not the best. It doesn't make sense, and the art is mid, but I put love in it and I think that's enough
#sbg#sbg (webtoon)#aiden clark#aiden sbg#ashlyn sbg#ben clark#ben sbg#logan sbg#taylor sbg#tyler sbg#school bus graveyard#hey full pages#hey its a comic oh my god its a comic#hi hi hi#really nervous about this thing actually becuase its not very good but i have mkre content lined up#so i dont mind one shitty thing breaking contaiment#metaphors about hair and about allowing people in via innocuous mundane things#watch canon explain the hair color thing and watch me cry about it#the concept is actually not communicated alright#so ill put it here#Roots as in finding his place with these people#because even if theyre running for their lives all the time#they are friends yk? and he loves them#across the comic you can see so clearly that Aiden loves every single one of them and that to someone who travels a lot and probably#struggles emotionally the act of “putting down roots” must be hard#so his hair here is a representation of his roots growing deep into the people he loves and the things they do together#and the last dialogue is meant as a way to let THEM see that he trusts them#but idk i wrote it but i dont know what im talking about#make your own interpretation i think thats more fun#berry art
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homest[ar/uck] posting. this was meant to be supplementary to the gerome comic as him 'explaining the joke' but i uhhhhhh forgot.
i'm not much for crossovers in the the traditional sense, but it IS one of my favorite character exploration exercises to just go like 'if x media existed in this universe, who would and would not be a fan of it?'. and these ones are pretty notorious and always very fun to mess with for that and so here we are
#technically evangelion too but i couldnt think of anything intersting for eva with these guys#pizza tower#fake peppino#noisette#gerome#peppino spaghetti#these guys will just show him things and then he brings it home to peppino and hes gotta deal with all that#the simple fact is if you watch homestarunner at an impressionable age it WILL fuck up your lexicon permanently#and i think fp is the sort that is just kind of eternally impressionable. so#gerome is the only one of the cast whos into hsr he quotes it Constantly but no one knows hes referencing things#they think hes just saying shit. he knows this. he thinks it's funny. secret references for only him#but yeah that opening line was meant as an actual in-universe reference to hsr. when he says 'an old joke' it's literal jsjkskjdkjfd#idk what time pt takes place but hsr is perpetually yesteryear to me. that shit is so 2008 you really had to grow up with it i think#as for the other one. everybody i think at least knows OF mspa bc noisette talks about it All The Time#but the rest either dont get it or dont care. anyway its her right to be obnoxious about it. her privilege‚ even.#noise hates it though. hes so sick of hearing about it. if you mention a classpect hes gonna stab you#this is the only thing i have where the three besties are even close to interacting thats so sad.i need them being funny in a room together#pizzaposting#off-art
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