#but thats the PROBLEM i wanna be up a few hours before its time to get up

[kirexa]

Alarms just fully do not work on the waking me up front so every night I set 30 alarms at max volume with loud sharp songs and pray

[phagodyke]

kind of annoys me sometimes how I can happily listen to my roommate explain the entire plot of whatever she's currently into but when it comes to my interests she can only listen for a few mins before wordlessly walking out of the room

[celestialtarot11]

Your future spouse 💰💍💗 fears, how you’ll meet, etc! Collab 💌

Hey friends! Today we’re doing a lovely collab with the mystical and wonderful @julyourwitch ! This was honestly such a cool collab with her 🤗💘 Ya’ll might wanna sit down for this one…its juicy 👀 we actually had some telepathy going on between us too as we were channeling 🤣 anyway, pick your pile below and enjoy this reading brought to you by us 💘🤗 feel free to comment, like and reblog. Your feedback is appreciated 😍 Happy picking!! (The last pic could not fit properly 😭)

Pile 1 💰🤍: Channeled by the lovely @celestialtarot11 Hi pile 1’s! Welcome to your reading 🙌☕️ let’s get started. Your future spouse is someone who loves spending quality time with you and money💰 your first date could be during the winter season for some of ya’ll, or in the summer. It may involve ice cream as seen in the card 👀 this person may be at a physical distance from you and you’d probably drive a few hours to see them, or have to take the plane. They have no problem paying for the plane 💅🏻 This person mentally & emotionally has fears about the future when it comes to commitment, but I see they are open about this and are willing to work on this with you. They are sweet, reciprocal, open and very chatty 💘💅🏻 they love to sweet talk you and they have a very attractive smile and laugh. Something you’ll feel drawn to. They could have Leo placements and Sagittarius! This person before you meet could work through self sabotage issues, especially abandonment. They’re afraid someone will leave them first, so they’re afraid to show themselves to you but eventually your connection will grow wonderfully. Lots of mutual attraction, values, goals. This is a spiritual connection as well, how you two will meet will be spiritual. You may have visions of them, so will this person. You may feel them close by (their energy) and know they are coming to meet you soon. This is someone who can meet you at your level and show up 🙌 This person could be hesitant to show their feelings for you at first but this will be overcome. I believe spirit is divinely guiding this marriage, and you may actually manifest each other before meeting 💍☕️ this person may do it unconsciously, whereas you may have a whole sit down and journal everything you want in a partner. Honestly thats valid! Get clear on what you want before ya’ll meet, this is important spirit says. For some of ya’ll, ya’ll are ready for this marriage commitment now 💗 ya’ll deeply want this and know what it takes. Spirit is offering guidance and says you’ll get there. Thank you pile 1’s! Feel free to like, reblog and share your thoughts always 🤍 your picture below —>

Pile 2 💼����: By the lovely @celestialtarot11 Welcome dear pile 2’s! This is your reading if you felt drawn to this. This person could interact with your social media before talking. They may heart your story, stalk your account, and try to know all there is about you before talking you up. They want to get a better sense of who you are, but here’s the thing, social media only shows a small portion of our lives. This person is deeply curious and wants to have a stable connection or idea of you. Eventually this person will text you, find the courage to speak up and start something! It may catch you by surprise but maybe you’ll know this stalking was happening already. For those who do not have social media you could meet them at a wedding, reception, or a regular event. They will be the waiter/waitress, and serve you. But their eye will be on you. They want to know all there is throughout the event. This person overthinks a lot and feels alone and scared in the world, they have a tendency to think they have to do it all alone. This person desires support however and someone to understand them. They want stability, for someone to take their time ❤️‍🩹 they have been through a lot. Its easy for them to get overwhelmed as you two talk for the first time. But they dream of you a lot, daydreaming. They have lots of fantasies of you, and they may even place you on a pedestal. This person does have self esteem issues, this is something that will be worked on through your marriage. There’s an awareness that they want an intimate connection, but also feel they aren’t worthy of it too. This will come up to be healed throughout your relationship. The Share Tenderness card tells me they are someone who is reciprocal, giving, gentle with their hands 😉 and loves knowing how you feel. They will constantly want to know from a place of care. I’m seeing lots of texts when you’re first dating, hows your morning going? Hows your night? How do you feel about xyz? Tell me what you think. Lots of that. Incredibly sweet, but is afraid of loss and rejection. They want you to send pictures of you because they find you beautiful 💘 and attractive. They love to admire you. It’s not necessary sexual in nature although it can develop, but this person has very genuine intentions towards you when they approach you. Not necessarily lustful. I think a part of them is spiritual as well, but it’s in the baby stages of developing. So when they meet you, an awakening will occur. Or many, as much as its needed to grow this person 🤗 i think you two will explore the cosmos together. This person is dreamy, romantic, and has a nostalgic vibe to them. But they won’t show this first. The more you know them, the more they are a softie. Cancer vibes are strong here, so is Scorpio and Virgo 💅🏻 thank you so much pile 2’s!! Feel free to comment, like and reblog 🤗🤍 thank you for your continued support! Your picture below —>

Pile 3 💪❤️‍🩹: Channeled by the one and only @julyourwitch ! Hello viewers, lovely souls and even readers(tarot or not) of the pile 3! Well, let's start with the energy that I feel most strongly from signs: Earth (mostly Virgo and Taurus) Fire (Aries & Sagittarius) and a bit of Air (Gemini & Libra) but I believe there are also some placements that dominate the following signs I mentioned above! I see here that the future husband (whether female or male is not something specific) has high self-esteem and knows how to take care of himself/herself, his/her values, his/her things, important people around him/her, knows how to behave and appreciate the other as well as be appreciated back! I feel like they like to wear good quality clothes and generally obsess about wearing things to feel good about themselves (they don't discriminate against any kind of quality clothes or anything, they've been through that 'poverty' phase too) I believe that respect and manners are everything for them and how much more they see it in those around them. But there is a little ego-pathy or beauty-pathy (I mean, they feel overly beautiful and even enjoy it, I wouldn't characterize them as narcissists anyway!) They appreciate what they have and acquire, mostly they are not ungrateful and this is very important for them not to be something they don't want to become or happen to them in a situation or people. I can tell that they have an obsession or tendencies to obsess over some object or person or something that they create and make it theirs! They really love stability, they don't want to rush at all or make rushy or sudden moves/decisions without properly processing and filtering them. They want everything to be on schedule, even their time off at home/work!Something I noticed now, they may want many other things, such as more money, stability, full schedule, clothes, household items, etc...but they wouldn't at all like to see the other person just like them. As if they'll get competitive or they might make a scene and leave without let you say a word ☠️ They enjoy and rejoice greatly in the positivity of life, the satisfaction and pleasure of what they have achieved and acquired/conquered! They are very optimistic people, they'll always want to help you with the honor and generosity in them (sometimes they will want to take something from you but not maliciously) it seems that they really went through a lot either in their childhood or growing up after puberty(or while they had puberty) and they had some intense situations with people who abused and manipulated them emotionally and physically. I heard very clearly "You know, I can read your mind and how you express yourself just by your facial/body expressions" No matter what they've been through, they know when to speak up if the other person is faking, lying, or trying to hide something. They are grateful for what life has taught them, because they always say "It's all in life, so with a smile and courage it gives you strength and peace within you" Their motto is like" I'll be stronger mentally and emotionally so why should I be scared or a coward?" WOA HAHAAHAH I LAUGHED HARD HERE I'M SORRY 😭😭

Omg pile 3, your future spouse has been really hurt, victim and in a tough situation indeed but they already know that it won't be temporary they're so self aware I can't 🥺🥺 As I said, they cherish and respect people that are honest and real with them,honesty and a stable psychological or mental state are everything to them because that is what they want to see in their partner or in the world. They went through a lot of transformations and they KNEW it would happen (not only self aware here but intuitive people as well) they knew that all these situations and the pain, the impasse all these unbearable and unexpected feelings would lead to a beautiful outcome/beginning, growth and acceptance for themselves and personal/emotional healing. Your future spouse also has been feeling also out (as if they're alone 😭) They also gotta need to understand that being happy or grateful with beautiful and unique appearance won't let you love yourself. (I heard "self love is needed too") Someone closed to them-some close person who played an important role in their lives, honestly treated them like garbage. It made them feel terrible about their bodies (which they are maintaining well so far) it made them think if they really know how to love and appreciate things and people the way they are (I felt a female figure here for some reason in this behavior ) taught them to believe that "If you want to have someone close to you or get married first and foremost you will look at appearance because that is everything, I don't want our image to be ruined". Nawwwww😭😭 they might overthink a lot because of all the shitty things they went through, they don't actually want to show fragile or weak in front of you, they really prefer to not talk about it(yet but slowly their feelings will exposed them once they feel comfortable with you) they'll also be/feel/show as if they're tired but no, not tired IT MIGHT BE THE FIRST GLANCE, but once you meet and understand them better they'll open their heart to you! (I heard" You know sometimes I need your attention.. "😭😭)

With the ace of pentacles upright and 6 of wands upright as extra cards I'm getting that they're open for new opportunities and new connections even professionally and personally too, also they really adore and admire people who value their life and respect their life and family too!

Take what resonates love and leave what it doesn't! Reblog&like it if you had fun &enjoyed!

Pile 4💘🤗: Hello viewers, lovely souls and even readers (tarot or not) of the pile 4! I didn't start yet and I heard very loud ("I do see you right away") AND I GOT CHILLS. I feel for sure that the signs here are fire signs, mainly Leo and Sagittarius, or these two strong fire signs may dominate their astrological chart and they may also have a little water sign here and there (or might have Scorpio or Cancer Rising or MC) That is crazy pile 4 cuz your future spouse is really REALLY interested or into spirituality, energies, reiki and you know when Isay intuition, right?? They ALWAYS FOLLOW THEIR INTUITION AS IF IT'S THEIR BESTIE! I feel that someone higher up has taught them about how to anticipate things or think without overdoing it I feel a motherly side or some feminine energy, it could be the feminine energy/divine feminine in them)! I feel like they didn't have enough friends or they didn't have a big circle of friends, probably just acquaintances and always a smile on their face wherever they go. Such crazy and dynamic energy first time Imeet/ sense. 0o They like to watch instead of talk, they prefer to observe instead of doing it(when it's needed tho) They're really really thoughtful and very wise with their words and how exactly can make you believe and count on them. (Not in a bad way obviously) They won't let you see through them first, they'll first analyze and read you first in oder to be open and free with you Iheard "You'll see if our energy matches or not boo") Sometimes though they make some mental or creative blockages LITERALLY OUT OF NOWHERE, they can have a mini breakdown with themselves and their feelings, but guess what.. THEY'LL BE BACK AGAIN! UNSTOPPABLE ENERGY HAHAHAHA Okay I'm not gonna lie but they might not have a program or some schedule for their plans and goals(as the pile 3) but they're visionary dreamers. Actually they changed a lot of places and traveled a lot and they're not lazy/bored to do it everyday! They're literally OPEN TO EVERYONE AND ANY OPPORTUNITY OR NEW PATH. Guys, pile 4 for real I really like this energy here They're ready for everything omg omg Iheard "Al or nothing. Nothing scares you more than doing nothing or leave it in the middle " I feel that nothing and no one scares them or stops them. They are fearless and want to convey to the world the message "Whatever you do in your life, whatever risks you take, never regret them. They make you strong both mentally and externally, take it as a victory and an experience!" They would like to have such a person by their side, but not quite like them. They're so open-minded and hardworkers for their goals and dreams(they also feel like young in their hearts 9(9) Why Ido keep seeing that they're connected with their higher self and very spiritual aware too? They also tend to be mysterious and secretive mostly their private life, they're so protective with those around them and with their partner(and their life too) but also open to see if the others have good or ill intentions towards them. Sometimes they might confuse their feelings with their intuition too. (They get so deeply in some things to get to know someone till they drain their energy which is very unhealthy) omg they often get misunderstood and disrespected- I CLEARLY HEARD - " I know, it's something from my childhood, it's fine it doesn't scare me at all. Everything is ahabit"

Pile 3,they might be extroverted but inside THEY'RE SOOOO INTROVERTED! I'm getting they have also an artistic way prolly dancing or singing or something related to. (I do see painting , music. Wow they wanna share&explore everything with everyone but sometimes their introverted shyness (not always tho) makes them freeze A BIT and think about it twice. Indeed they have real and few at least 2-3 friends max they trust a lot or dearly, They're so forgiving people and they not what they did wrong or right, they can also notice/find it very easily too. They like people who are outgoing, real and pure with their energy and soul&words too. They pay big attention to eyes and lips -

They currently have some kind of financial loss but Ido see them overcome it! PILE 4 THEY'RE S 0 0 0 0 0 ENERGETIC AND ATTRACTIVE ASF O M G THEY REALLY REALLY LIKE TO TAKE CARE OF THEIR BODY AND THEIR MUSCLES OSSJEJFIXJSJE They’re so active emotionally, physically and spiritually too! Not gonna lie but they enjoy being the center of attention too- HAHAHAHA

Once you meet them guys you won't regret it! They can also bring joy and love and support to others and those around them(even when they're with their partners too) THEY'RE SO ECSTATIC HAHAHAAH REALLY REALLY GOOD THO! They'll be there when you need them not only in the good times but also in your darkest times too, full of energy Iwish Icould describe more but I'm so happy and excited in, if you guys could see my smiley face you would understand!

With the 7 of cups rx and 4 of pentacles upright, it is telling me sometimes their choices or thoughts about their actions and in their love life might be chaotic and overwhelming cuz they confuse themselves and they need some clarity and some guidance and support from their partners) and must hear their inner voice too, and might be overprotective and jealous as well but not in a crazy stage/level of being jealous or possessive too!

Take what resonates and leave behind what doesn't! Reblog &like if you had fun and enjoyed!

Thank ya’ll so much for reading our post! @julyourwitch This was incredibly fun to do with you 🤗💗 Hope ya’ll enjoyed and feel free to like, comment and reblog!

[sarah-bear706318]

Paring: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x fem!Reader

Warnings: implied smut, Hangman being himself, love sick Rooster

A/N: Just a little something I thought of awhile ago for Rooster🩷

If there was one thing about Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw was that he loved you more then he loved flying.

Rooster and you had just got engaged and the two of you could not be happier, that was until he got his orders to return to top gun. Bradley having to return for a mission did put a damper in the wedding plans but thats what you signed up when you said yes to marry a Naval fighter pilot right?

"How would you feel if I came with you" you ask while eating dinner one night

"You mean to San Diego" he looks up from his plate asking

"Yeah why not as long as I have wifi and my laptop i can work from anywhere"

"Baby that would be amazing" he said with a big smile grabbing your hand

"It's settled then after dinner I'll look for flights"

"Why not drive out have a little impromptu road trip, we'll take the bronco" Rooster says

"Even better" you reply

After dinner you begin packing and making preparations for your trip seeing how you only have a few days to get things in order.

3 days later the Bronco is packed, Playlist is made and you and Bradley are on the road heading west to San Diego!

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

After a great yet tiring trip you make it! You were able to find housing right off a base that offered short term stays. You pull up to the little house and start to unload your things.

"What do say we go to hard decks for a drink tonight baby" Bradley says wrapping his arms around you "wanna see who else was called for this mission"

"Sounds great hopefully Nat did I miss her" you tell him "let me shower the rest of the road trip off" you say walking down the hall before pausing taking your shirt off you turn to Rooster "you gonna join me fly boy or..." before you could finish your sentence Rooster is already down the all throwing you over his shoulder "have I ever turned you down"

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

An hour later you and Bradley are pulling into the parking lot of hard deck. He jumps out and jogs over to open your door and help you out and you both walk in.

"Baby I'm gonna go bathroom then I'll get us a few beers" you tell him "ok baby heres my card" he replied with a kiss and handing you his card

"Bradshaw, is that you? Is this how I find out your state side" Rooster hears Phoenix say while she's playing pool

"Yeah well thought I'd surprise you" He says with a cocky smirk. She then takes her shot and hits him right in the stomach with the pool stick "guess I surprised you back, it's good to see you"

"Its good to see you too" he says then gives her a hug

"How's that girlfriend of yours" Phoenix ask

"Well she's not my girlfriend anymore, She's my fiancé and she's great she's in the bathroom right now, she'll be so happy to see you" he tells her

"No shit you popped the question congratulations"

"Thank you..."

Before Rooster could say anything else another voice from his past comes to his ears

"Bradshaw, as I live and breathe"

"Hangman, you look...good" Rooster says

"Well I am good Rooster I'm very good, in fact I am to good to be true" the cocky pilot says taking a shot at the pool table eyes never leaving Roosters

Rooster just rolls his eyes at the cockiness of his fellow pilot, as the group starts talking about the mission they will all soon be on.

Meanwhile you walk out of the bathroom and over to the bar and wait your turn to order. You look over your shoulder and see your fiancé and he sends you a wink.

It still amazes you that after all this time he still gives you the same butterflies as he did the night you met.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

As Rooster is still talking to his friends he see y/n at the bar and sends her a wink, little did he know Hangman also saw y/n at the bar and wanted to prove how good he was. The problem was he didn't know who she was but he was about to find out...

"Well look what just walked in" Hangman says and everyone looks over to the bar

"Yeah thats..." Phoenix starts to say but is stopped by Rooster

"Damn that girl is fine" "look at that ass" Rooster hears Cody and Fanboy say. Rooster just smiles to himself. Nobody had ever met Y/n or even knew about her but Phoenix

"And Rooster I'm about to show you just how good I am. If you'll excuse me I'm bout to go by a beautiful lady a drink and get a number" Hangman says walking away towards the bar

"Aren't you gonna stop him" Phoenix ask

"Nope he'll find out real fast that my girl can take care of herself" Rooster says with a smirk.

Back at the bar you are still waiting for the bartender when you hear a voice beside you

"Well what brings a gorgeous woman like you in a navy bar" you turn and look and see it's one of the pilots Bradley was just talking to.

You shoot Rooster a look and he just winks and that let's you know you can have some fun.

"What can I say I love a man in uniform" you say in a flirty voice. "So you gotta name mr navy"

"Jake but my callsigns Hangman"

"So a pilot even better" just then the bartender makes it your way

"What can I get you ma'am" he says

"2 coronas with lime please" you go to give him the card Bradley gave you when a hand stops you "I'll take care of it" jake says handing the man his card.

"Well thank you flyboy" you say

Hangman continues to flirt and throw his best pick up lines your way, you are trying hard not to laugh. The bartender comes back with your beers and you pick them up but not before Jake throws his arm around you.

"So what about you give me your number" he says "we can go out one night what do you"

Neither you or Jake saw but that was it for Rooster it was funny but he isn't gonna let any guy touch his girl

"You know..." you start to say as you try to move his arm when you hear Roosters voice behind you

"Hangman"

"Can we help you Rooster" Hangman says again in a cocky voice with a smirk

"Yes you can get your arm off my fiancé" He says with a cocky smile while Jake's smile falls from his face

"No way Rooster this girl is to hot for you" jake says laughing til he finally looks and sees the ring and the dog tags around your neck how did he not see any of that before he thinks to himself then pulls his arm off you.

"Yeah but thanks for the beer man, come on baby Nat is dying to see you" Rooster says grabbing your hand and tipping his beer bottle to Jake

"It was nice meeting you" you say hopping down off the bar stoll with a wave leaving Jake standing there speechless.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

"Nat I'm happy to see you I missed you" you say hugging Phoenix

"I missed you too I can't believe you didn't tell me you got engaged to this man"

"Its been less then a month I haven't told many people yet plus I never know how to get ahold of you"

"Baby let me introduce you to everyone this is Coyote, Payback, Fanboy, Bob," just as Rooster is introducing you to everyone Jake walks over "and you met Hangman" he says with a laugh

"Nice to meet you all and Hangman thanks for beers" you laugh and everyone joins in

"That was a mean joke" Hangman says

"Sorry how bout next round on Bradley and me" you say as a peace offering

"Deal" he says

A few minutes later you are getting another round for everyone when you hear the sound of a piano. You don't even have to turn round to know who's playing it

"You shake my nerves and you rattle my brain

Too much love drives a man insane

You broke my will, but what a thrill

Goodness gracious, great balls of fire

I laughed at love 'cause I thought it was funny

You came along and you moved me honey

I've changed my mind, this love is fine

Goodness gracious, great balls of fire"

You walk over and sit on Roosters lap while he sings.

Kiss me, baby, you kiss his cheek

Ohhh the feels good

Hold me, baby

Well, I'll still love you like a lover should

You're fine, so kind

Got to tell this world that you're mine, mine, mine, mine"

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

You get home that night a little tipsy and very touchy

"So wanna have some fun Lieutenant Bradshaw" you say stripping your clothes off

" I love when you call me Lieutenant" Bradley says running his hands down your hips to your ass

"Well Lieutenant have your way with me"

" On one condition...you leave the dog tags on" he says kissing down your neck

"Yes sir"

[scarlett-or-wtv]

This is Vegas after all,

A Christopher Sturniolo Fanfiction

Warnings (will be different for all parts): Alcohol (very small mention) Thats it!!!

Summary: Y/N finds herself lost in Las Vegas when she bumps into a stranger. What happens when you fall in love on vacation?

A/N: This is gonna be a series im not sure how many parts yet but I tend to over write and have a very hard time making stories short 😭. This is just an introduction chapter to give you an understanding of the story line! Enjoy!

If theres one thing I thought was gonna happen on this trip, it definitely wasn’t this. How could an innocent trip to Vegas with my best friend go so wrong?

The summer air turned less inviting as the hours went by. The night wasn’t particularly cold, but the cool breeze that came along with it was enough to make goosebumps appear on my arms.

Go figure I wouldn’t bring a jacket. I wasn’t planning on being outside. I walked along the road as I helplessly tried to call Audrey. Voicemail, thats just great. Of course her phone was dead. Never go to a rave in a city you have never been in.

I was staring down at my phone as I tried to call an uber back to the hotel. The lack of wifi made me groan in frustration. Due to my lack of paying attention I bumped into a group of people. My eyes widened as a can of Pepsi came crashing at my feet. Seriously?

I quickly picked up the can and lifted my gaze to meet the person that was previously holding it. “Im so sorry. Ill buy you a new one. I should have watched where I was going.” I quickly apologized.

The unfamiliar man chuckled. “Its fine it was almost empty anyways.” He said with a charismatic smile.

Its only then that I truly studied his face. This man was absolutely gorgeous. I fixed the strap of my dress that had fallen off my shoulder when I picked up his drink. Thats when I realized I was stood in front of 3 identical men. “Are you sure? I really am sorry.”

He chuckled again. The sound was absolutely beautiful. “Its really okay. It’s almost 2am. Why are you out here by yourself?” He asks looking around the area before meeting my eyes again.

“I was with a friend. We went to this rave and got separated in the crowd. I tried to call her but her phone is going to voicemail.” I explain.

“You shouldn’t be out here by yourself. This is vegas.” He says with a smile.

“I don’t have any wifi to call an uber. So I was just gonna walk to my hotel.” I say crossing my arms over my chest as the cool breeze makes me shiver slightly.

“We were just about to head back to our hotel. Where are you staying? Maybe we can give you a ride?” He says watching as I try to keep myself warm.

“Im staying at Bellagio. Are you anywhere close?” I ask looking at the other men before looking back at him.

“Your kidding. Im staying there too.” He chuckles again. “We can give you a ride if you want. I understand not wanting to get into a car with strangers.”

“Then lets not be total strangers. Im y/n.” I say putting my hand out to shake his.

“Chris.” He says shaking my hand. “This is Nick, and thats Matt.” He points to the other two men.

“Triplets?” I ask looking at each of them carefully.

“Yeah.” He chuckles. “So, would you like a ride?”

“You aren’t gonna kidnap me right?” I joke with a small giggle.

He laughs and shakes his head before leading me to their car. Matt gets into the driver seat and Chris gets in the passenger, which leaves me with nick. I studied the piercings on his nose for a moment. My gaydar was telling me this man was definitely not straight, but thats not something you just ask. What if he isn’t? That would be extremely awkward.

“Thank you.” I say putting on my seatbelt.

“Its really no problem.” He says turning behind him to look at me before looking forward again.

The drive to the hotel was peaceful. Quiet but not awkwardly quiet. The guys would make small talk with each other here and there. I stayed quiet because I didn’t wanna intrude on their conversation.

After a few long minutes we pulled into the hotel parking lot. Matt pulled into a spot and put the car in park before we all got out. I shivered again as the outside air pierced my skin. We swiftly walked into the hotel.

Once the door was open I was met with Audrey. I ran to her and gave her a hug. “Oh my god where have you been? I was so worried.” I say squeezing her tightly.

“Im so sorry I got lost and I called an uber right before my phone died.” She explains.

She looks behind me and sees the triplets. “Am i high or is there triplets behind you.” She says jokingly.

I giggle. “This is Chris, Matt, and Nick.” I say pointing at each of them. “I bumped into them and they were staying in the same hotel and offered to give me a ride.” I explain.

“Oh. Well thank you.” She says to them.

Chris returns his thanks before I look at them again. “Im gonna head to sleep. Thank you again.” I say.

“Your all good. Maybe ill see you at breakfast tomorrow.” He says with a smile and a nod.

I return his smile and nod before turning and walking with Audrey to the elevator. Once we have turned the corner she swats my arms.

“Holy shit. How did you manage to bump into the hottest set of triplets I’ve ever seen.” She says before dropping her jaw.

I laugh again. “I know right? Chris is absolutely gorgeous.” I say shaking my head as i click on our floor number.

The doors close as she looks at me again. “Are you kidding? Matt is gorgeous.” She says.

We continue our bickering before the elevator door opens. We walk to our room and I put the card in the door. The light flashes green and I turn the knob. The room was a mess of open suitcases. I plop down on my bed and take a deep breathe, thankful we both made it back safely.

After about an hour Audrey had fallen asleep. My mind was absolutely racing. Thankfully, this hotel has a 24 hour jacuzzi and pool. I quietly grabbed my swimsuit and stepped into the bathroom. The swimsuit was a small purple tie bikini. I tied the top around my neck before grabbing a towel and wrapping it around myself.

I quietly crept out of the room and back to the elevator. I clicked the button for the ground floor before looking around in silence as i waited for it to stop.

I stepped out of the elevator and followed the signs to a glass door. I put my card in and pushed it open.

After setting my towel down by the door I turned the corner and froze when I saw them in the jacuzzi. There eyes flicked in my direction, pulling them out of their previous conversation.

“Oh, hey.” I said awkwardly scratching the back of my neck. I suddenly felt exposed in my bikini.

“Come in.” Nick says happily. I smile at his kindness. My body heats up as I sink into the steamy water. The jet’s underneath making the surface turn a bubbly white.

We all talked for awhile. I looked at Chris every now and then. He looked so good, hair dampened from the steam, cheeks flushed from the heat, in nothing but shorts. God this man was so perfect.

“I think im gonna head to bed.” I say suddenly. Chris gives me a disappointed look.

“Okay. Goodnight y/n” He says with a small smile.

“Goodnight Chris.” I say standing up. “Night Nick. Night Matt.” I say before going back around the corner and grabbing my towel.

Once I made it back to my room I quietly opened the door and made my way to the bathroom. I changed into my pajamas before climbing back into my bed.

Time skip ☀︎︎

I woke up the next morning to see Audrey doing her makeup in the mirror. “Good morning.” I say sitting up and stretching.

“Hey!” She says looking at me in the mirror. “You need to get ready like right now.” She says continuing doing her mascara.

“Why?” I ask confused.

“Lets just say a certain triplet came by our room this morning and invited us to breakfast with them.” She says giving me a suggestive look.

I jump out of bed and start rummaging through my suitcase. I pick out some baggy Jncos and a white tube top. I quickly get dressed. I grab my BB Simons belt and swiftly put it through my belt loops.

“Where are we going for breakfast?” I ask.

“He said it was a surprise.” Audrey says with a shrug.

I quickly do my makeup and my hair before putting on my air forces. “I went to the hot tub with them last night.” I tell her as i tie my shoe.

“What?!” She says whipping her head around to look at me. “Did Matt look super hot?” She asks.

“They all did.” I say with a giggle.

We finish getting ready and I pick up my Dior purse from the hook on the door. I throw it over my shoulder and open the door.

We make it down to the lobby and we see the triplets. My eyes widen when i realize Chris and I are unintentionally matching.

“Dude. You copied my swag.” He says with a fake mad face.

I laugh. “You copied MY swag.” I say with a smile.

“Lies. I was wearing this when i came to your room this morning and you were still in bed.” He says sassily.

I turn to Audrey. “You let him in our room?” I ask jokingly.

“Sorry!” She squeals putting her hands in the air defensively.

I give her a fake glare before turning back to Chris. “Where are we going?”

“Its a surprise.” He says with a shrug.

We walk outside to Matt’s car. Audrey insisted on sitting in the passenger seat. I knew it was because of Matt, but I think she also just wanted me to sit next to Chris.

We arrive at our destination a few minutes later. I read the sign on the building. “What is this place?” I ask.

“You’ll see.” He says helping me out of the car.

We walk inside and my eyes widen as i see the roof is a gigantic aquarium tank. Colorful fish swim around above us as people are dining below.

“Is this a good time to tell you im afraid of the ocean.” I say looking at the fish.

“You’ll be fine.” He says taking my hand and leading me to a table. My nerves catch fire at the contact. He brings me to a table and the others follow behind us. Audrey sits next to Matt. I sit across from them with Chris and Nick on each side of me.

The waiter approaches our table some minutes later. She asks us what we would like to drink.

“Can I get a strawberry margarita? On the rocks.” I ask and she nods.

“ID?” She asks and I take out my wallet.

I hand her the card and she looks at it for a second before handing it back. “And for you?” She asks Chris.

“Pepsi please.” He says with a smile.

Audrey orders a Dr Pepper along with Nick. Matt gets a root beer.

I start looking over the menu before Chris suddenly speaks. “Your old enough to drink?” He asks.

I give him a confused look. “Please don’t tell me your a minor.” I say.

He laughs. “No. Im 20.” He says shaking his head.

“Good.” I say relived.

“Good?” He asks.

“Good your not a minor.” I explain.

“Why?” He asks teasingly.

“Because that would be very illegal of me.” I say with a shrug.

“And what are you planning that would be illegal?” He asks with a smirk.

I kick his leg under the table. “Shut up. You know what I mean.” I say playfully rolling my eyes.

Our drinks arrive and we order our food which comes short after. Matt takes a picture of us for instagram.

The clattering of plates being stacked and the sound of forks screeching against porcelain filled the restaurant. The ongoing sound of chewing echoed in my ears as the situation became slightly overwhelming.

I sipped on my margarita with my eyes closed trying to drown out the atmosphere around me, to no avail. The sounds were only washed away when Chris started speaking.

I focused on his words as they flowed out of his mouth, concentrating on each syllable he pronounced. I took a deep breathe as the relief washed over me. His voice and the way he used it was all too hypnotic.

But when his sentence was finished, the silence of the restaurant retreated with his words. I looked around the table trying to concentrate on someone else’s words, but they didn’t flow like Chris’s.

Thankfully after a long excruciating hour breakfast had concluded. Thank god.

A/N: This is my first published work! Let me know what I can improve and any thoughts or opinions you have!!

Click here to find my masterlist☆

[rockstvrdotcom]

okay, hear me out, a D/S dynamic with Ticci Toby. One day you leave the mansion and go into town to buy a couple of things with Toby, and while he's gone to go get something some random guy approaches you. You don't realize it but he's flirting with you and again without realizing it you're somewhat flirting back, but Toby definitely noticed and when you get back to the mansion he's decided that you need to be taught who you belong to.

- 𝙔𝙊𝙐'𝙍𝙀 𝙈𝙄𝙉𝙀 !! ⪼☆

TICCI TOBY X FEM! READER ♡

enjoy!

oh my gosh i literally love this OMGG

CW: hair pulling, being tied up, dom/sub, jealousy fuck, breeding kink, orgasm denial (like once) , light choking, degradation, name calling (slut, whore, cunt), fwb, dub con (if u squint..)

you can skip to the part where it becomes NSFW cuz its kinda long

"you ready to go?" toby asked, keys to the mansions shared car in hand. he wore a black hoodie and some grey cargos with a belt, a mask covering the lower half of his face. you were just gonna get groceries for the mansion, you and toby were the more "normal looking" people.

you nodded, heading towards the exit. he opens the door for you and you thank him in response. you heard the old van's engine begin to run, you were suprised how that old thing still works. you head to the van, opening the door to the drivers seat. toby grabs your wrist. "we both know you suck at driving, let me drive." he said so passive aggresively. you roll your eyes, "i also suck something else." you winked. he looked away, shoving you into the car.

you mostly sat in silence for most of the ride, the occasional sex joke here and there. the ride to get into town was almost half an hour with this old ass van, leaving you both plenty of alone time.

but, you and toby arent a couple. actually, you aren't even that close as friends. it's more of a friends with benefits situation, whenever you both are horny or whatever, you fuck. that's pretty much it. you don't really talk when you're not doing that.

you think hes cute and hot, and he thinks the same for you. thats for sure. but relationships in the mansion never really.. work. you asked toby out before, but he rejected you since it "distracts from work" or whatever he says, you guys never became more than just friends with benefits. you breathe in as you both arrive to the grocery store. just a few snacks and frozen meals, you both didn't want to be out for long. your faces have been on wanted papers lately, you didnt wanna risk it.

you looked at the checklist..

waffles

broccoli

kitchen knife

pizza

noodles

water

it wasn't much, so you took your time look through the aisles for something you wanted. as you walked, you accidentally bumped into some random guy who had tons of stuff in his hand.

"i'm so sorry-" you let out a little gasp, apologizing for the inconvenice. you don't usually apologize, let alone do you even say anything thats somewhat nice, but damn this guy was smoking hot.

"it's no problem," the guy laughed. you smiled back sheepishly. "would you mind helping me pick this stuff up? if you have time of course." he asked.

you nodded yes frantically. picking up this fallen cans of food and whatever else there was, as you were, he asks "what's your name?" while scratching his neck, trying not to make it obvious he was trying to get your number.

"it's y/n. what's yours?" you ask back. you finished helping him pick everything up.

"it's emir." he smiled. he was almost as tall as toby, he was about 6'1 (ik thats not tobys canon height) with (h/c) hair and (s/t) skin.. and he was mighty fine.

"sooo.. i think you're pretty cute. and i may or may not have bumped into you on purpose just to get your number.." he laughed nervously and you giggled in response.

"aw thanks! i think you're pretty cute too," you took out your phone, "my number is-" you felt an arm snake around you, and another snatch your phone out of your hand.

you looked behind you, a figure slightly towering over you. "what the f-" he shushed you.

"she has a boyfriend." it was toby, you realized that when he grabbed you by the wrist and dragged you to the exit, grocery bags in his other hand. you looked behind you to emir and mouthed sorry. he laughed awkwardly, disappointed.

toby let go of you so you could get in the van. you both went in and literal steam was about to come out of your ears. "toby, what the actual fuck was that." you said with furrowed eyebrows.

he stayed silent and turned on the radio. he began to drive and you scoffed. "the guy was actually hot too.." you mumbled under your breath. you faintly heard a grunt escape tobys mouth and you rolled your eyes. "while you were flirting with some guy, i got the groceries." he said, eyes focusing ahead of him while he started the engine.

"we weren't even flirting, he just wanted my number!" you told him, anger obvious in your voice.

"like hell you weren't flirting. you literally were about to give him your number dumbass." you kept silent after he said that, and looked out the window for the rest of the ride.

by the time you both were out of the car and at the mansion, he had a death grip on your arm as he dragged you up the staircase and into his room. he slams the door behind you, locking it.

nsfw below the cut! ★

he pinned you against the wall. "you're fucking mine." he whispered into your ear. he moved strands of your hair away and bit and sucked at your neck and shoulders, showing everybody who you belong to. you moaned out his name, feeling his dick growing through his pants against your leg. he shoved you onto the bed, getting ontop of you with his knee inbetween your legs. he took off his belt and took ahold of your wrists, tying you to the headboard of his bed.

his look softened for a second, admiring your body beneath him. "you're such a fucking slut. what makes you think you can talk to other men like that? you're mine, you belong to me." he said into the nook of your neck, lightly choking you as he was taking in the smell of your perfume. he took off your clothes that were already half off. he fondled with your breasts, smashing his lips against yours, your lipstick lightly smudged on his lips. his lips found their way across your body, he left occasional hickeys on the way down to your pussy.

he aggresively kissed your inner thighs, "all mine." he grunted inbetween kisses. hands gripping your thighs, his nails digging into your skin.

"i'm all yours, toby." you said under your breath, your back slightly arched.

"bullshit." he scoffed as he looked up at you, pushing your panties aside and putting his fingers inside of you, thrusting them in and out of your dripping wet cunt. a loud moan escaped through your lips as he began to eat you out while he fingered you, tongue circling around your clit.

"you love my tongue, don't you? slutty bitch." he said, words laced with venom and jealousy. his harsh words brought heat straight down to your pussy, you clenched around his fingers. you became increasingly hot, and knew your orgasm was coming.

"toby- fuck- i'm coming." you moaned, biting your lip. the knot in your stomach began to untie. you felt his pace begin to slow, then stop. you whined, bucking your hips up hoping to get some pleasure and bring you to your high. he retracted from your pussy and took back his fingers. leaving you a panting and sweaty mess, still tied up. he shoved his fingers into your mouth, making you taste yourself on his hands. "suck, whore." he told you, pushing his fingers further down your throat.

"please toby, let me cum, please. i'm sorry. " you cried out through his fingers, begging for your release. he chuckled at your pleas.

"you wanna cum so bad, don't you? fucking slut." he laughed at you, the humiliation brung red to your cheeks as you tugged at his belt that kept you stuck to the bed, begging to be untied and atleast finish yourself if he wasn't gonna do it for you.

you sighed in relief as he took off his shirt and pants, throwing them to the side and pulling down his boxers just enough so his dick would pop out. "i'm gonna put all of my babies inside of your pathetic cunt." he growled, eyeing down your naked body like a hungry wolf.

he pushed his dick into your pussy, already thrusting in and out at a brutal pace. you cried out, back arched. he admired how your eyes rolled back and how your beautiful voice was chanting his name. he messily played with your clit as he pounded in and out of you, the bed banging against the wall.

you felt the knot in your stomach being brung back once again, tears of pleasure flowed out of your eyes. he straddled your hips, nails plunged into your sides, enough to break skin. you tried to grip onto something even with your hands tied, clenching on his dick.

"fuck fuck fuck fuck- i'm coming, please let me cum." you begged. he looked at you for a second, as if he was making a decision. then he picked up his pace, going faster than before. you cried out in pleasure, a wave of ecstasy washing over you as you came around his cock.

you felt his hips stutter, his pace became slower and sloppy. he wrapped his hand around your throat, leaning over you while playing with your tits. you bit your lip, still riding out your high. his thrusting sped up, then came to a stop. you felt him release inside of you. "fuck, your gonna look so pretty with my babies growing inside of you." he told you behind clenched teeth, roughly caressing your cheek.

"i don't wanna see you acting like that with another guy again." he said, about to unbuckle your wrists. you scoffed in annoyance.

"i asked you out and you said no, that's your fucking problem." the sexual tension was still there, but you could see rage on his face.

"your cunt belongs to me, you belong to me." he growled, before he roughly took ahold of your face and connected his lips with yours. his hands creeped down back to your pussy, playing with your clit. you tried to speak, to tell him that you were still sensitive. but it was muffled as he aggresively made out with you. he untied your hands, leaving them free to roam all across his body. you traced his muscles with your fingers, caressing every scar.

eventually you guys stopped eating at eachothers faces, and he laid down on the bed. you held him close to you, the room still smelled like sex. he pulled his boxers back up and pulled the sheets over both of you, kissing your forehead.

you laid there, your body sore. slowly, you began to drift away and fall asleep, head on his chest.

its not proofread so sorry if i made any mistakes. another post is coming otw! ♡

[gimmethosedaddymilkers]

Just general Arthur headcannons cause I can't sleep and I'm stressed

WARNINGS!: Fluff, female reader, maybe some smut knowing me so 18+ general feel good things

Tags: @kieropal @mrsarthurmorgan7 @photo1030 @cantchoosejust1 @6kaja9

My gif I made that looks like shit lmaooooo the quality dropped EMMINSELY

Arthur loves cuddles almost more than his s/o

He is very touch starved so when he finally gets someone to be with he loves to be close to them all the time

As close as physically possible

Granted he does like his alone time still and occasionally takes a few days out of camp or will sit with you but not quite all the way up your ass

When he is in a cuddling mood though he will crawl into the cot with you and place his head on your chest with his full weight, as long as you can take it anyway

He loves his hair being played with

He will fall asleep to it almost instantly

He absolutely adores the feeling of your fingers threading through it

Sometimes though he likes to hold you rather than you holding him

He likes to feel like hes protecting you, and he likes the feeling of your ass pressed against his crotch

He loves to pull you into his lap when he's sitting around the fire at camp

His favorite thing to do is embaress you, if your face is red he's happy and feels as though his job is completed.

He also loves it when after he's fucked you and he steps outside to smoke for a bit before coming to bed

If you come out in one of his shirts, and just his shirt (or his shirt and your knickers if you're a little bigger in the tummy and taller in the legs)

And you beg him to come back and cuddle you

He can't say no to your face he just can't

You're too sweet

And he loves you too much

Sometimes he comes back to camp with animals

Like a kitten or some shit

And you can't tell him no

Dutch however has no problem telling him to get it out of camp

Arthur is really hot when he cleans guns

You ask him to show you sometime

And hes so passionate about the weapons he uses

Its just so cute to watch him talk for hours about the guns he likes the best and why he likes them the ones he doesnt

But it's also incredibly difficult for you to focus on anything he says

Because he continues to clean as he explains and all you can focus on is his forearms and how they flexed with each movement of his arms

He tries to get you to do it, and he sits behind you and takes your hands in his to show you

The motion is...uh...

Familiar

To say the least

And you def give him a handy later

He has a love hate relationship with dominos

They can be really fun

But hes also more of a poker guy?

So dominos is calm and fun but poker gets people mad and thats more fun than calmly winning dominos

Speaking of poker

You are his good luck charm

And he hardly will play unless you can sit on his thigh

If you're subtle enough you can ride his thigh whilw he plays, just don't do it with Abigail at the table she can tell what you're doing even if you're as subtle as physically possible

He loves kissing you too

Like

A peck

A deep kiss

A regular one

Make out sessions

Slamming his lips against yours

He lovesssss

Any kind of kiss with you

Its his absolute guilty pleasure

(That and getting back scratches from you)

Which if you scratch hid back just right

He will literally

Just

"Oooohhhh yeah...mhm....right there, keep fuckin' scratchin'...Yessssss...."

He literally makes you wanna fuck him

All the time

On accident

He likes to hold your stomach the most

Just cause he can kinda hug you rather than just squeeze something

But if hes in a squeezing mood your thighs are the go to target

He loves the feeling of them and loves being trapped between them more

(He loves seeing his cum splattered against them the most but he's a gentlemen he won't tell you that in broad daylight....he will when he's trying to get you in bed tho)

If you put flowers in his hair he pretends to be grumpy because hes supposed to be a big grumpy outlaw but

He loves it

Lets be honest

He just loves how you always find something to do for him, regardless as to whether its something perminant or not

(Like putting flowers in his hair to help destress)

He also loves laying in your lap, awake rather than sleeping, having you play with his hair while he draws you

His horse loves you more than him

And it makes him angry

Because his horse is supposed to be his horse

Not yours

He brings you gifts

But not like

The typical ones

Like drinks for the two of you, like amazing Wine thats like EXPENSIVE

Its so he can take you out on a date out past Strawberry and get you to relax

He'll get you anything he sees that reminds him of you

Anything

I mean

Anything

The dumbest things

He'll hand you like a little tiny piece of candy

Because the wrapper matched one of your shirts

Of course he gives typical gifts too

Like flowers

And jewelry (usually stolen but sometimes purchased)

He buys you dresses too that he likes

(Lingere too, if he sees it in the window, of course he's nervous to give it to you at first but he will)

He loves it when you wear it

He loves it when you love what he picks out

And when you wear it?

Ohhhhh

It does not stay on very long

I mean

I unless theres a slit where there needs to be one

Then it stays on

But

Otherwise its doesnt last long

Sometimes it does if he's too eager cause he'll just pull the fabric to the side instead of taking the whole thing off.

He hates wearing suits

But if you convince him to

He will

Its the same with nicer shirts and vests, and ties too

But you can persuade him to put on a nice tie and long sleeve button down easy

Especially if you tell him that you think he looks extrodinarily handsome in them

He is a prankster

If you watch him carefully in camp

He causes more mayhem than Lenny or John, or Javier anyone, but he's sneaky about it

So hardly anyone ever realizes its him

But if you watch closely enough

You'll see him do the most hilarous things

Some pranks are smaller than others

Some are bigger

Like theres differences

Sometimes he tosses herbs into the camp pot that'll make the stew spicy

And then he'll sit back and watch everyone panic and rush around for drinks to quell the fire

Or he'll wait until camp is practically empty and unscrew one of the chair legs (usually the ones that Dutch likes to use)

And wait until he can catch Dutch taking a seat

He acts like he doesnt see it

But you can see him holding back kaughter to the point where he almost cries.

He didnt have a pillow before you moved in with him

And you made him get one

You also made him get a bigger and comfier cot because he's been sleeping on pretty much a sheet of plywood for like 15 years

If he cuts himself while shaving you make fun of him but kiss the spot (even though you know thst won't heal it and he does too, but he likes the idea of you healing his ailments)

He makes you get a professional photo done so he can put it on his nightstand and you only agree if he's willing to take a picture with you

He doesnt want to at first

But he's fine after you convince him

By telling him he could fuck you anyway he likes that night

(which I mean usually he does anyway, but the idea of you with your back arched and hands tied behind your back with your face in the pillow does things to him)

He takes the picture with you

Jack likes Arthur more than you

He doesnt say that

But he always asks for Uncle Arthur's help rather than Aunt Y/N

Arthur picks you up from behind and kisses your neck sometimes before dropping you, smacking your ass, and running away

Usually he hopes that you'll chase him

He loves it if you catch him and push him to the ground to kiss him

Massge him

If you though scratch his back did a lot?

Massage it

He'll lose it

"O h...Darlin'...jesus....fuck...yesss...do that....yeahhhh jus'....jus like that girl"

He literally just melts

He'll probably fall asleep if you massage him though

He'll get sleepier and eventually stop speaking but rather his words will be replaced with groggy grunts and groans

That is all for now, brain will allow the sleep now lmaooooo

Hopefully these are fun though!!!!

[magickpancakes]

hii update on xael’s languagey thingy it went well :D

it was a christmas gift i think i said friend in original ask it was for my brother but hes my friend lmao so it was a bit of a piss-take/jokey because we’re like that idk

the like actual gift was a gift card for like a local games/anime/comics/pop culture stuff store called area 52 but their gift cards are metal tokens which is cool but yeah so was inspired by that to do something alieny

and was heavily inspired by i recentlyish had played started playing roblox pressure with a tumblr friend and love the documents i was gonna like redact with marker some things but forgot (redacted in the images here uh place names even though ive said the store name and its local to our city and also his name for idk a smidgeon of privacy)

(made my own stamp out of floor mat foam but forgot to mirror it so had to stamp it onto a piece of paper and then onto the file so thats why that is shitty)

(i had to make up a few characters sorry i went through again and couldnt find L i know you mentioned that you have used it before but i couldnt find it, i think i used my own B G L and X didnt do j q or z because yep) (also huge shout out to your updated Y its so much easier lmao) (like the three diamonds i was getting good at writing by hand ( idk if youre stylus or mouse or finger when digital arting but i can imagine if i were using a mouse itd take me probably 6 minutes to draw one Y) if did the top ^^^ then the bottom vvv instead of 1 diamond 1 diamond 1 diamond but yeah idk lmao)

the notebook was the day by day musings of detective inspector theodore allen from PISSER and his like descent into obsession over glorp over the course of like a week and yeah basically had a translation table from xaellian(?) xaels series of glyphs to english in it because hes not as like pattern coded idk (me when i saw 1234 (what) and 4234 (that) in one of your xael arts and that led me to fit together almost their whole character set) but yeah he had to like translate a series of clues that led to more clues that led to his actual gift which were yeah metal gift tokens which its sci-fi so glorp called them credits it did take him about an hour to solve everything lmao but it was like 11pm when he started and had been a big day idk

so yeah idk just wanna say thanks to you and to xael hope theyre chilling in the void all nice style and i hope youve had a good past couple days and wish you the best in the new year :3

bit of long ask(?) bit rambly but yeah just wanted to update, again thanks for letting me use their language :)

No problem, im incredibly happy you wanted to use the glyphs in the first place ^w^ that gift is so creative and awesome!! I bet your brother had an amazing time figuring out all the clues n such :D

Ive been doing well, and i hope you have been too! May the new year be fortunate for you as well :3

[5-htagonist]

god damn im so happy rn... ill stick it under a readmore bc its about food and my appetite idk if it would be triggering also this turned into more of a diary entry than anything lol My Blog My Rules though

i made curry last night and im really happy because ive been having a lot of trouble eating and Making myself eat, on top of being really erally really broke so we havent had much food in the house thats just Ready To Go consistently.. like, we always have oats, but we dont always have milk, and i cant eat them with water.. or we have ham but we run out of bread, or all i want are fruits and leafs but we cant really keep anything except apples/oranges/grapes because they dont go bad before we finish them, or bananas cause they arent really ruined if theyre overripe you just throw them in the freezer. so we cant get salad materials.

if i try to just shove calories in my body and i dont like it i wont finish it. like i will feel full until i stop trying to make myself eat it. and this isnt even just when adderall affects my appetite.

then, on top of all that, i know if i eat i have to do dishes. my husband usually does them, but hes been going through a really bad time for the past couple months too, plus we only moved out july 2023, and before that his mom had been Divorced outta the house earlier that year iirc plus id been living there since july 2022, so his brain and nervous system has felt safe enough for the ptsd recovery stage for nearly 2 years. and he gets hit really hard with seasonal depression, and he has adhd too. he typically does dishes, i typically do laundry. the problem is its easier to wear the same clothes for a few days, or rewear laundry that isnt rancid, or wear ill fitting clothes that have been shoved to the back of the dresser, but its hard to wash a dish when the sink is full and the kitchen is overwhelming.

so, to avoid having dirty dishes, i wont eat. whats worse, is i was insanely stressed over school for like 3 weeks. all the stress i should have had this semester hit me really bad all at once. when im that stressed, i cant think about anything relevant to maintaining myself-- especially not maintaining neutral-positive self talk and constructive self esteem. which means i shut down if anyone needs anything from me real or imagined. which means i cant be there for my husband and make sure he eats and check in on him. so all this stupid shit just feeds into itself. ive had more s/h urges than ive had in years i think, and not even in response to anything extrinsic.

my goofy ass got drunker than i usually do super quick the other night, it wasmy husbands birthday party. i cleaned up the apartment super nice since mostly my stuff was strewn everywhere and did the dishes. i didnt eat all day and i think i had like, one inadequate meal the day before. so i was exhausted after cleaning, our roommate ordered pizza and i ate and passed out for 3 hour nap. by the time i got up everyone was already at Least buzzed. my brother in law got a mom call and my husband (drunk) was like Hey. Give me the Phone.. tell her i wanna talk... because she LOVES being upset that her kids are having a good time and feels the need for Hour Phone Call when and where she wants it, and my BIL is an adult but they dont treat him like one, so hes still really deep in feeling trapped in these trauma responses.

this i think is what really got me, other than not being on my full dose of adderall so my emotional abilities were compromised lmao. i was tryingto tell my husband i love him, because i was leaving to weed store, and he was getting triggered while drunk, so he was annoyed i was interrupting the call and i didnt get my byebyehugnkiss. not to mention they were being really loud earlier. so now i feel bad. i get back immediately down 2 shots (3 shots is where i am Comfortably Drunk) and share a j actually post cancelled kendrick just dropped. the point was that i got too drunk and started hitting myself on the head and crying in the kitchen floor lol but who cares about that KENDRIIIIIIICKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

[twipsai]

heyoo! just wanted to say love your rewrite comic of sonic forces!! tis very cool :)

if you don't mind me asking, is anything else going on in this rewrite which you could let us know about? or tis a secret?

ok first of all this ask, the two reblogs you added tags to, and the comment you left literally made me wanna write so much more for this rewrite you have no idea. genuinely such a large motivation burst TYSMMMM

SECOND OF ALL! this rewrite is kind of vague rn, i have an idea for a four or five chapter fic that takes place in the month gap between forces and idw, but (glances at my 2/3rds finished wip thats 32k words rotting in my gdocs) well. im trying to finish something else for the time being, so i have no idea when thats gonna happen

in terms of actually rewriting forces itself, i have quite a few ideas for it but not a lot of concrete things written down -- my main problem with the game, especially after fully playing it (5 hours of my life fucking WASTED), is that it is simultaneously such a serious story, but doesnt take itself seriously in the slightest -- you have, on one hand, Sonic being tortured for six months in a tiny prison cell, but on the other, you have Sonic walking out of there completely fine and it's never acknowledged again. you have, on one hand, two teenagers leading a resistance in a war, but on the other, you have those two teenagers acting bland and uninteresting the entire time. theres so much that could have been done with this story, but instead of grabbing hold of that spark, the writers, instead, decided to write something bland, boring, and worst of all, disingenuous. this is worse than writing something thats bad, in my opinion.

my rewrite takes a lot of notes from my buddy Chip's rewrite called Reinforced (which theyve only really posted about on artfight here), so much so that sometimes i talk about them interchangeably lol, one of the biggest changes in the story is that Tails and Rouge work together. also Infinite is a much bigger threat, specifically to Sonic, and his death is much more intense

this might sound like a deranged thing to say but ive been tossing around in my head what i want Sonic to go through during his time in the death egg, whether i want it to be a white room torture sort of deal, or if i wanna torment him with visions (illusions), so ive sorta been trying to figure out in exactly what way hes fucked up LMAO

additionally, like most other people, im cutting the avatar and Classic Sonic from the script -- theres something to be said about Sonic going through something that fundamentally changes both him and the world, and fighting that threat along side his younger self, but the source material isnt interested in exploring that, so im not either (i actually am, but not in this rewrite,,,, not in this rewrite.) and im cutting the avatar from this in favor of bringing Tails back into the story beyond him being scared and smart for like 10 minutes of the total runtime and then saying "true dat" at the end. i mean cmon!! he watched his big brother presumably die right in front of him! the unbreakable bond, well, broke! thats fucking important! Frontiers and IDW explored this, and i want to as well. its very interesting to me. and he should have been playable. i will die on this hill

also, Sonic doesnt get rescued at the start of the story, it happens wayyy later into the story (right before the climax probably). i hated how they found him practically two seconds after they lost him

a lot of this may be influenced by Sonic Forces Overclocked, which i have plans to play (once i have. free time), since ive heard a lot of good things about it and am very interested in the story it has to tell.

"wheres shadow" idk :( probably brooding in a cave i havent thought that far ahead

[neaxsfiction]

Bakugo comfort fic please 🥰

Bakugo's a character I've not read many things about but I'll try my best to portray his personality the best way possible. Its a bit rushed but i did my best. Thanks for the request ❤️

Bakugo comforting his friend

I knock softly on his bedroom door hoping I am not disturbing him. I just need to talk to him.

He opens the door after a few seconds. His hair is messy and semi wet, he prolly was after shower. He was wearing a black tanktop and some matching sweatpants and also the usual angry expression he always has.

"Whatcha want at this hour?" He scoffs.

"I needed to talk to someone" I reply truthfully.

It's gonna be a rough night tonight.

"Shut up and come in" he growls and gets inside his room

He sits on his bed and glares at me.

I take a deep breath and start speaking. I tell him how my ex boyfriend dumped me some hours ago. I explain him what that guy meant for me. I cannot help it, when I flashback our memories, tears slip out of my eyes. How could he do this to me?

For a split second I thought his eyes softened as I was tearing up and explaing him. It must've been the tears though, Bakugo is never being soft for anybody, not even his closest friends. I think he has never seen me that way before so thats why seems to listen to me carefully.

"Told ya from the start he was a piece of trash" he spits out after bearing my meltdown.

I find myself tearing up more. How could he say that now?

"Stop being so weak. It's just an average guy. Nothing special about him." He explains. His anger seems to have toned down and he seems invested in this conversation.

No, bakugo is not like that.

"He was my first love..." I manage to say to him between my sobs, not knowing what else to say at this point.

Maybe I was the stupid one for not seeing his red flags from the start.

"And? Are you gonna let it be your last as well?" He asks and his tone softens.

"I don't know..." I say in pure despair.

"He wasn't good for you. If you find a guy as great as me - if that's possible, you won't have such a problem again" He explains with a rasp on his voice.

My sobs calm down a bit after his words. Maybe he was right. Maybe not. Maybe my head's too much of a mess to be able to think properly.

I notice him stand up and heading towards me. He looks at me with a soft expression. Maybe I didn't imagine that earlier.

He places his hand on my head and raises it so I can look at him directly in the eyes.

"Next time show me that you actually have a proper taste to guys." He smirks coming close to my face.

I nod and his words are traveling around my brain. Maybe I actually need to get some better taste in guys.

He stares deeply into my eyes as if he's unfolding my memories with my ex boyfriend and slowly remove the feelings behind them. Does that guy have a second quirk?

He lets me stay a bit in his room and we have fun while talking about cringy moments with my ex. Maybe he's right about him. At least I will now think of those moments and will be mentally thanking him for dumping me.

He offers to take me to my room that night. That's so strange of him, he never does that but anyway.

"Wanna make him jealous?" He asks jokingly.

"If it means to regret dumping me, then hell yes" I reply with the same playful tone he has.

"I'd help you in that." He says and for the first time that night he stares to the floor as we reach my bedroom door.

There is an awkward silence for a few seconds that totally ruined the playful mood.

What did he say again?

"Goodnight. Please don't cry over that douchebag." He says now looking at you with an almost apologetic look in his eyes. After that he slowly walks away.

"Goodnight to you too. I won't, I promise, and-" I say without thinking straight at this point.

He stops as I haven't finished my phrase and turns around, tilting his head to the left expecting me to continue what I was saying.

"I'd let you help me." I finish off my sentence and quickly open my room's door hiding behind it.

~

Bakugo pic

[fallingforel]

arabella pt 4 - menswear

masterlist

“WHERE ARE YOU? YOURE MEANT TO BE HERE BY NOW! I MEAN IT Y/N I NEED AN EXPLANATION. NO THEY DONT GO THERE ON THE MAIN TABLE SMALLER CENTERPIECES ON THE ROUND TABLES, I NEED AN EXPLANATION?? IM WAITING ON ONE.” “It was matty okay luce, he forgot to wake me up, so im gonna be just a tad 3 hours late”“Oh good lord, okay look as long as youre here for the rehearsal dinner everything is going to be fine im sure” “Okay good? How are things anyway? Hows henry? Luce?” “Err alls good here. We have a slightly larger problem though. Em and him just walked in”

⋆��°✩

⋆｡°✩

where all of the 1975 gang and y/n attend a wedding 

warnings: a few swearing, recreational drugs use (coke and weed) and a panic attack, also please let me know if there is any more that I need to be aware of them

A/N and here it is im taking tommorow and monday off, but I promise you, chap 5 will be out next weekend, kisses x 

⋆｡°✩

“Well get rid of them then, because I tell you now Luce if they are still there, when the wedding comes around I will just stay at my mums house until they’re both gone and you don’t want your maid of honour to cancel on you last minute do you?” 

“No I suppose not. Okay I will do my best to get them gone, look I’m gonna have to go now babe I haven’t got time to sit around and chat I have got a wedding to sort out, I’ve still got to make sure the DJ knows the no plays and when to play our songs so I love you and I’ll see you in about 4 hours kisses.” Lucy says while making an unbareable smooching sound down the phone. 

“Love you. But I mean it when I say, I want them GONE.” 

“Yes, yes, okay I’ll see what I can do babe love you, but I really have to go now hun” which is her final sentence before I was met with the signal of her putting down the phone. 

⋆｡°✩

Before, I start properly focusing on my drive back to Wilmslow, I had to make sure Adam knew that both of our exes were there. So thats exactly what I did. 

reaching out to press my home button on my phone “phone ad” 

“now phoning ad” I was met back with the robotic voice speaking out to me through the aux cord

the phone rings a couple of times before Adam picks up 

“Hey Y/n whats up?” 

“err look I thought you should be aware, that Em and him are both there and that you should be warned because they might show up tonight or tommorow, and I kinda don’t want them to because then I’ll have a panic atta-” 

My waffling on was then cut off by adam’s voice ringing through the aux in my car, 

“look y/n/n, who cares if they’re both there, I certainly don’t I’m over her now, you should be over him too it’s been 6 months, it’s no longer fresh in our minds and plus we’ve both got new people in our lives, you’ve got Al and I’ve got Carls, infact I’m inviting her to the wedding, there was already a spare place from Em being uninvited and Lucy said yes to inviting her so now shes coming, you should invite Al im sure he’d be well up for it. G told me he was a massive fan of ours” 

“I’m not too sure Ad we literally only just met last night, do you really think it would be that smart to invite him?”

“look just tell me you’ll consider it y/n/n you at least deserve to have someone there for you” 

“okay, okay! I’ll think about it but its not a yes”

“good im glad, right im gonna go. Because ive still got to pack some last minute things, and I’ll see you later on at the rehearsal dinner okay” 

“okay lots of love” 

I say before putting down the phone. and going to phone alex to see if he wants to come. At this point I’m stopped in a petrol station to phone him as I didn’t save his number earlier. 

ringing once twice three times biting my nails in anxiousness, before i hear a thick northen accent ringing through my ears 

“Hey, who is this?”  

“Al?” 

“Y/n? is that you? was wondering when you’d call are you alright darlin’“ 

“yes yes it’s me look listen. I’m going to a wedding this weekend and I was wondering if you’d wanna go with me. its just theres an extra place due to some dramas that happened and so..”

“look love, I would really like to go, I wish you would’ve told me sooner, I’m literally about to board a plane to leave England right now, but we have to sort out a date some time soon, I’d love to get to know you better”

“Yeah no of course. I 100% get that plus its not like you would’ve missed out on anything anyway. It’s literally a boring wedding” 

“You don’t have to downplay it fo me love, sounds dead interestin” 

soon an announcement is made that I cant quite hear but it is soon made clear that it’s Alex plane because he bids his goodbyes and then he hangs up the phone 

⋆｡°✩

“omg! y/n/n! thank goodness you’re finally here! you’ve missed out on a lot it’s like grand central station in there, people flying everywhere moving things honestly I don’t know how I do it for a job. It’s soooo good to see you, honestly, I’ve missed you so much, how’s London and the modelling life treating you?” Lucy says running up from the front entrance of the moderately sized building, and to my car giving me a rather large squeeze. 

“It’s been good, London is manic though, all the time, and these shoots they are just amazing I did one recently for a major U.S. company had to travel to L.A. for it. but honestly my career has taken a major turn since I moved to London with the boys.” 

“That’s so good I’m so happy for you. And how are the boys? Are they good? Is the music life treating em well?” 

“so well, I can’t say too much because it would spoil it. But they have recently been getting so many radio plays it’s ridiculous but I am so proud of them!”

“thats so good! Looks like that move was good for all of you then!” 

“yeah yeah it was, Luce I’m freezing can we go inside? Are they in there?”

“ of course we can babe, no no they’re not! my mum told both of em where to shove it. that soon made them leave!” 

“I’ve always loved your mum. did you know that!” I say throwing an arm around her shoulder and walking into the venue. 

⋆｡°✩

“so when are the rest of you London lot getting here?” Henry asks standing next to me. 

“umm not too sure but I’m sure they’ll be here soon. shouldnt be too long they set off about 3 and a bit hours ago. so in like in a few” I say in reply. 

“Hopefully, they won’t be too long. Luce is stressing way too much I dread to know what she’s gonna be like tommorow.”

“Ha! Yeah. I know what she’s like, I remember Matty’s 18th suprise party, she was dead stressed when I organised that, and she wasn’t even the organiser! But look don’t worry, it wont go too mad. I know that with her everything goes to plan” 

“yeah, thank you for being here by the way, I know it can’t be easy being here especially after what happened 6 months ago.”

I was about to reply when I was cut off by a curly haired boy, a really annoying one to be precise. 

“THE PARTY HAS ARRIVED” 

“Matty shut your mouth, go get your suits on boys, rehearsal dinner commences in 10, you’re late already as is” Lucy says. Before walking over to where Henry and I were stood having our conversation

“y/n/n, I need you to go get your dress on too.” 

“okay, I will go and do that now” 

⋆｡°✩

The rehearsal dinner was a success, I knew it would be, anything Lucy organises is. It’s what she does best, kinda always knew she would be an events planner, her and Henry was meant to come to London with us, Lucy living with me and Henry living with the guys, but then the both of them recieving their dream job offers in the heart of Manchester, so they never did. I think it was meant to be that way if I’m completely honest. I just don’t think it would’ve ever worked, especially with the guys and I all being single and them two being in a relationship. Sure,it worked in Wilmslow where none of us lived together but the whole dynamic that we have now would’ve shifted and just wouldn’t have worked.  

Currently I am squished between a tree and a skinny curly haired man, we ended up, going back to my mums last night and both George and Matty insisted that they had to see my mum. So just like we were 17 again and had just had a drunken house party, we are sleeping in my bed. To be fair its quite a large bed, however all three of us, are slightly bigger being 22 and 23 now, we just dont fit. 

So I did what I had to do in order to get up. Wiggling to the end of my bed as so to not wake the two massive lumps in my bed, and eventually getting off at the end and then I went on the search to check for my phone. 

Finding it laying on my bedstand on G’s side, he must’ve found me passed out and it still on so he must’ve put it there. 

Turning it on to find out the time reading 7oclock, the wedding starts at 11 so its time to make my way to wake up the boys so that we all can head to the hotel, both of them being groomsmen and me being lucy’s maid of honor, so I do just that but I cant do it normally, thats just not our friendship dynamic. So I head to the bathroom to get a jug and fill it with cold water, heading back to my bedroom I start pouring it on matty.

“What the fuck y/n.” 

“It’s time to get up, we have to head to the hotel, to get ready. We all have to be ready by 9 incase the event staff need help with anything, and I promised Lucy we’d be there by half 7, 8 at the latest to make up for all of us being late yesterday, now help me wake up G. While I find out where the fuck Ross and Hann are” I say while pulling my phone out to find out where the other two of our group are. 

“I dont fancy getting slapped by the tree thanks, you can do it, I’ll call Hann and Ross” 

“uh uh, you made me late yesterday, you get the pleasure of waking up the giant, I’ll get us a maccies breakfast on the way if you do.”

Soon enough he does it, earning a slap from George “it’s the crack of dawn, Matty what the fuck do you think you’re doing?” 

“To be fair G, it’s 7 we have to leave in 10 because Lucy wants us at the hotel, and I dont think any of us want to anger bridezilla, I just know shes gonna be on a warpath today. Plus I promised stink here a maccies breakfast, right now though I’ve got to phone the other two find out where they are, can one of you two phone ross? I’ll phone ads” Matty nods his head reaching for his phone. while Im on mine pressed to my ear, trying to get through to him stepping out of the room so I don’t get distacted by Matty on the phone to Ross.

Finally after about a minute I’m met with a raspy voice. 

“Hello?”

“Adam? Are you with Ross”

“yes, yes its me, and No what do you want at this ungodly hour, Y/n?”

“I promised Lucy I’d make everyone head to their respectful getting ready rooms, at half 7 so can you head to Hen’s and start getting ready I’ll bring you a McDonalds.” 

“yes yes okay. I’ll head there now, when you come knock on my hotel door its 432, Carls will have my car keys, your stuff is in my car, Matty couldnt fit it in his” 

“okay, okay. Bye I’ll see you.” 

“bye bye, see you in a bit, double sausague and egg pleaseee”

“yes yes okay, see you in a bit Ad’s” I said before hanging up the phone and returning to my bedroom where Matty and George still reside in my bed, although this time a phone was pressed to Mattys ear talking into it 

“Yeah, Y/n wants us to get ready, so we will be there in a bit”

I mouth to George “is that ross.” earning a shake of his head. “his mum” i nod my head waiting for him to finish his conversation. 

A few moments later a “yep okay bye mum I love you see you tommorow” ending the phone. 

“Right as much as I am glad that you were on the phone to your mother Matthew what is the situation on Ross?”

“He was with Henry already, apparently Lucy banged on his door at half 6 this morning making sure he was up” Matty said chuckling a bit

“That girl honestly” I say shaking my head 

“Right come on you two lets get going we’ve got places to be people to see” I say slapping the two boys on their legs. 

⋆｡°✩

The ceremony was a success, and it all went well. now we were heading on a little walk to where the reception was being held. Matty George Ross and I were infront, and then Adam and Carly following suit behind us. 

We walked into the marquee tent finding our seats George and I both sat at the head table as I was Maid of honour and G was Best Man, Matty, Ross and Adam were sat on the table infront of us though so we all weren’t too far from eachother, luckily I was sat next to George and Lucy so I didnt have to endure meaningless conversations with other members of the bridal party like I did at the hen do. 

“C’mon G we’re sat here”  I say grabbing his hand and pulling him towards our seats after checking the seating plan that was displayed on the foam board standing on the white easel. 

⋆｡°✩

And soon enough the reception was well underway after Lucy and Henry had their first dance. George hopped on the decks doing what he knows best, Lucy had let him have an hour at it giving the DJ an hour break to dig into the buffet. 

I walked up to G wondering if Matty had any Joints. Because Lucy had want to let loose, and she hadn’t smoked in ages but claimed it was “my wedding night so I can do whatever the fuck I want” clearly having had taken too much advantage of the free bar at that point. 

“well your the best man so whats the plan? we gonna smoke” 

“y/n/n I’m busy doing my best to give everyone a fucking good time here, go talk to Matty about it, he’s outside. He’s the one thats got ‘em I’ll smoke my own later” 

“okay I will, c’mon Lucy lets go find Matthew, bye G”

We walked outside finding Matty perched on a log smoking, we approached him 

“oh Matthew” Lucy called out 

“oh here comes trouble” he shouted out earning a giggle from lucy 

“look we just wanna know if you’ve got any of those joints left, I know you must have at least half of one left, I can see you smoking one, and it’s not even halfway finished. The bride here wants some to let loose, Hen hopes it’ll calm her down and stop her being so stressed about everything. ” 

“Look bug, I would and you know I would, but I’ve only bought three like I told you before, you’re gonna have to ask about. We went to school with half of the people in there and we all know they’re all pot heads, someone in there is bound to have some” 

“Come on! I know who will have some” Lucy says. 

⋆｡°✩

Eventually we found someone with some after asking about three people. Joining Matty on the log he was sat on when we came outside previously. Staying in silence, we sat and smoked. Until Lucy eventually piped up 

“You wanna know why I’m smoking?” 

“Because, it’s your wedding day and you can do whatever the fuck you want?” I question laughing 

“no, it’s cause I needed to put off crying, this day couldn’t have gone worse. Henrys Mum sent me a text this morning saying that I shouldn’t be marrying him that he doesn’t really love me and I don’t deserve him, she’s been giving me evils all day. y/n/n I almost left him at the alter especially after Em’s text” she says tears flooding her eyes when she turns to look at me. 

“oh Luce, c’mere babe” I say with my arms wide open and she shuffles along the log we’re sat on and hugs me, sobbing fully at this point. tears not coming to my eyes. After she pulls away I can’t help but ask about the text. 

“what did you mean by the fact that Em texted you? what did she say” 

“she said about how I banned her from my wedding, and that I needed to grow up because I took your side after the whole argument six months ago and that she would make an appearence along with him today, but not before she said that in a year or two Henry would leave me for her, I’m so sorry for not telling you earlier Y/N, I haven’t even told Henry, I’m not sure I even want to. I don’t want to make him leave, I know it’s silly because we’ve been together close to a decade at this point. But what if he decides he doesn’t want to be with me any more y/n/n, I don’t know if my heart will be able to take the pain especially with you in London” 

“Don’t be silly Luce it’s okay, but she has no right to make you panic like that especially after warning you that she’s going after Hen, Luce, you are aware that you’re going to have to tell Henry about all of this right, especially about his mum, she has absolutely zero right to tell you whether you’re good for her son or not.” 

“She’s right you know, you have to tell Henry, even if you dont want to, he needs to know. I’ve never known the two of you to keep secrets from eachother, especially one this big Luce, you know I may not have liked you at the beginning when you were dressed in nowt’ and telling everybody you were shagging every boy in Wilmslow, But Luce I like you now, and I know that you would really benefit from telling him, I can go get him if you want, y/n/n and I can be there while you tell him if you want?” 

“no, no it’s fine I need to tell him on my own you two go. enjoy your night, come find me when you’re leaving.” 

“okay okay, I’ll see you in a bit we’ll send him out to find you” 

⋆｡°✩

After finding Henry, and telling him to go find Lucy outside, Matty dragged me to the bar. 

“so bug.” he says turning to me “whaddya drinkin’?” 

“malibu and coke” I say in reply 

he gains the attention of bartender “scuse me lad can I have an ameretto and a malibu and coke please, passionfruit variation please” This boy knows me too well at this point as he asks for the passionfruit variaton because he’s all too aware after too many slip ups at parties to fill my glass with original malibu and me turn up my nose at the coconut flavoured liquer. 

He thanks the bartender after handing us our drinks. And we go over to our tables but not before matty spills a load of his on a taller lad who we’re not too sure we know. 

“watch where you’re going pot head yeah and also watch your girlfriend yeah think she might be getting some tonight but certainly not you, you scrawny fucker” the 6″3 skinny lad pipes up 

“look I might be spilling my ameretto because of previous joints yeah, but don’t talk about my best mate like that, I don’t know who you think you are, yeah you might be taller than me, but you look just like me so I reckon I could knock you out, so just watch what your saying yeah” 

“Matty, leave it hes not worth the fuss yeah” 

“ooh getting your girl to sort your problems are we?” I can see Matty clenching his fist just as if matty was about to swing for him so I step infront of him before anything can happen. 

“Do you want anything to end up in the press about Denise’s son losing it at wedding?” I ask him knowing thats exactly what would happen knowing the fuckers that went to our school. He shakes his head no in reply “exactly, so leave it yeah, this guy is not worth our time or effort yes?” he nods his head I tap him on the back throwing an arm around his shoulder “come on then stink” and so we’re off, back to the dancefloor so we can forget our troubles and have an absolute blast of a time before I’m back to work in two days, and the lads are back to the studio next week.

⋆｡°✩

“Matty, I need to go to the loo” I shout over the loud music but not before making a sniff gesture with my hand signaling that it was time to bring the sniff out, It was kinda known in Wilmslow that our group, were drug users, not hardcore as much as people think, only when parties were going on or when one of us wanted to feel something. 

“cmon then bug, lets go to the bathroom” 

Once we made it into the bathroom I lock the main door so that no one could make it in especially, Lucy’s conservative great-grandmother that definetly had some interesting views. 

as I came back from locking the door hopping onto the counter where matty wasnt cutting lines. After he finished cutting the lines he handed me the rolled up 20  but not before saying “two each” “ooh a 20, very rich of you” “shut up and just sniff your two, off the porcelain basin will you” “okay okay chill out, Matthew” I say hopping off the counter taking the rolled up 20 that he was still holding out for me to take. 

⋆｡°✩

Safe to say I was feeling the effect of the drug I had taken just a mere 10 minutes ago. 

and soon enough, Em and him were here and I was making a beline for the exit, Making Matty clearly confused as he hadn’t noticed them. so obviously as confused as he was, He followed. 

“bug, bug, slow down.” he called out and I turned to face him, my breathing irregular and tears streaming down my face, my makeup clearly smudged. 

“Woah,woah. Whats happpened? why the tears bug?” He asked. 

I tried replying but I couldn’t I was too worked up to explain. My hands doing anything they could. Unsure of whether it was the drugs making me like this or just seeing him in the flesh after 6 months. 

“okay okay, bug look at me” Matty sounding so distant at this point, so I didn’t even know where he was “Honey, you’re gonna have to look at me so I can understand what happened” 

Touching my chin, he gently lifted my chin with his fingers. removing them, my breathing still rapid at this point. 

“cmon bug, copy my breathing, deep breath in, and then push it out” doing exactly what he said. We just sat there in silence me following Matty’s breathing. Until it was back to a normal pace. 

“You gonna tell me what happened in there? What made you all worked up, so much so I had to do breathing excersises with you which we hadnt done in ages, god last time we did them was when you caught him cheating with Em” and suddnely his eyes go wide realising that thats what happpened. “oh bug!” he says scooching over to give me a hug. Knowing me too well at this point to realise, that in that moment thats exactly what I needed a good hug from my best mate. 

I start tearing up again, “I saw them together, Matty and I thought I was doing so well as well I hadnt thought of him until a couple of days ago.Yet, I saw him in the flesh and it feels like I’ve now taken three steps back.”

“No, you havent bug, not at all, It’s natural it generally is, do you remember when I got cheated on?” he asks me I just nod in reply “well I remember she disappeared a while after that. And then like a year later I saw her, in cafe nero when i was working, god the tears all started to come out then, I had to get out of there, and because of that I got fired, it was right in the middle of morning rush aswell” “so thats why you got fired, we all thought it was because you burnt yourself or set off a smoke alarm lighting a joint in the bathroom, but awwh Matty you’re so sweet, I never thought you would be that heartbroken over her, we were only 15/16″ 

“Look, I’m just saying it’s natural to feel like you’ve gone back in time, anyway are we gonna go back inside or do you just wanna get out of here?”

“Just want to get out of here, I don’t think I can face him if I’m being perfectly honest, sorry stink you probably want to go back inside an enjoy the rest of your time with everyone, probably pick up a girl too.”

“No. No. don’t be sorry bug, you have every right to. Besides I’m probably gonna yosh in someones mouth soon if I stay any longer, plus I dont want some random coming up and going in for the kiss” reaching inside his blazer pocket to check for the time “and It’s 5 past three I can hardly see and if i stay up any longer I’ll probably pass out so its probably best if we go now anyway.” 

⋆｡°✩

end of chap 4

[bloomed-night-flower]

Gn reader

(THIS ISNT ACTUAL NRC. Just there are actually other gender than boys 😨)

This is Reader x All!

“Have you heard that a new play will be happening?”

“Yeah, I’ve heard. Apparently they already chose one of the love interests of the story!”

“Really who is it?!”

The gossip of the two girls that say near Ace and Deuce interested them very much.

“I heard it’s gonna be Y/N!”

“REALLY!”

Now all of the sudden Ace and Deuce where theater kids. And that didn’t end there. Now apparently many lovely boys and girls wish to play the part of the “Heroic love interest” to get a chance you kiss Y/n.

All of the people who wished for the role were ass.(Apparently to the judges.) Well except for 21 very unique students. Riddle, Trey, Cater, Deuce,Ace, Leona, Ruggie, Jack, Floyd, Jade, Azul, (YOU KNOW WHO ELSE IM NOT WRITING EVERYONE….), Kalim,Jamil, Vil, Epel, Rook, Idia, Malleus, Lilia, Sebek, and Silver.

All boys were perfect love interests for you, but the judges had thought of them as all equal acting skills. (realistically most would be butt cheeks but oh wells man) Some don’t even know how Idia got in here? But the judges had came up with the quickest solution ever. Through out the story the boys will switch out with each other. They would all wear the same outfits and all wear wigs. (Some would wear platform boots to match the height of the supposed character.[short asses😨] ) The play was about 3 hours and 50 minutes, so each boy would get ten minutes with you. And the kiss is around the 3 hours and 30 minutes mark. So now all the boys are slowly calculating who would kiss you,(some calculated slow than other but thats okay) and the boys came to a conclusion you would kiss AZUL! (THE CROWD GASPS 🔥🔥🔥🔥

Now there was only one problem…They all wanna kiss you on the little lips. So now each of them are scheming each others down falls. Isn’t that splendid!

And now finally comes the day of the play. Half of the students in the theater were there to see Y/n and the other half was to watch their personal ships of y/n x [character] sail. I mean we love a balanced fan base. Besides the point, backstage there stood all 21 boys glaring at each intensely, some just smiled and glared. But the boys focused their glares more on Azul. Azul just had a sly smirk while thinking how king triton had given him so much luck. Footsteps were able to be heard and the boys slowly turned their heads to the sound. Their stood you in all your beauty. You wore some medieval clothes that you preferred. Now this made the boys want to sabotage Azul even more, while Azul just wants to faint from your beauty.

Its a few minutes before the play starts, when suddenly a large bang of a door is heard. “WHAT THE HELL!?” Ace’s voiced could be heard in the front and now the guest were worried. In walked in the man himself…..

.

.

.

It was shrek. SHREK RUSHES IN THROUGH THE DORR HE JUSTED SLAMED OPEN AND HE SLOWLY WALKS UP TO YOU. “Y/n L/n, I ask of you a favor. Will you run away with me to my swamp?” Shrek’s eyes stare at you awaiting your answer. WHEN SUDDENLY, ONE OF THE CEILING TILES FALL DOWN. The ceiling tile hits Trey and knocks him out. But who comes down from the ceiling tiles?

.

.

.

Its BARNEY, YES THAT PURPLE DINOSAUR. “STOP Y/N DO NOT ACCEPT HIS PROPOSAL!!!BECAUSE IF YOU RUN AWAY WITH HIM, YOU WILL LEAVE ME YOUR CHILDHOOD FRIEND BEHIND!SO STAY WITH ME INSTEAD Y/N!” Barney now held your hand on one knee. You weren’t able to comprehend wtf just happened. As you were about to say something, a big force punches both Barney and Shrek. And the one who punched them was….A CAT? Oh wait, it was pusheen. Pusheen meows at you to just go back home with your family and pusheen. This time you knew the exact answer, “Okay!” You pick up Pusheen and walk out of the theater. And the boys stood there flabbergasted at what just happened. And in the end no one got to kiss you.

The End

Also happy april fools man, THIS IS NOT AN ACTUAL SERIOUS FIC. I made this during 2-3am so yeaaaaa. (I can’t believe my first writing post is for april fools 😔 Also probably add the header blocker thing later)

[ask-carmenpondiego]

Chapter 10: Talk about an acid trip

The sun rose, toast was buttered and cinnamon-sugared and eggs were fried. The smell of coffee roused everyone as they prepared for the day. Carmen sipped her coffee as everyone gathered around, collecting their food filled plates she had offered. She leaned on the counter watching everyone, such different beings coming together bonding as friends rather than coworkers. This was much different than when she hired henchmen. She felt she could trust them more than the traitorous goons from years past. She grumped at the memory of them easily trading her over for a plea deal when Interpol was involved.

Maybe this time, if she treats them like the family she desperately wants to bring home, just maybe they will prove more loyal, and she will trust them too like family. Hopefully this would be a worthy investment. “What’s on your mind? You look a bit puzzled.” Asta munched on her toast. Carmen looked up and smiled, “Oh I was just remembering the last time I had a team like this, let’s just say this is a major upgrade.” She winked at the carbuncle.

Drake whistled, “Alright! Listen up you degenerates: Let’s stick to the schedule, finish what you’re doing, we are wheels up in ten.” Carmen gave a thumbs up and rinsed out her cup. She grabbed her pack and her coat with hat from the coat closet by the door, finishing up with a tactical belt. She grinned to herself, she didnt have to remind them or anything. This investment was already paying for itself.

Soon they were all boarding the plane, Drake and Vasha making sure everyone was fastened safely to their seats and directed to where parachutes were in case of emergencies, since this was the first time everyone was in their plane. M, being paranoid, double checked everything in case of loose screws or bolts. “Flying makes you nervous, M?” Carmen asks, while M settled back in his seat. “I’ve made too many of these really easy accident jobs. I dont need this one adding to the list so I’m making sure nothing is wrong. Not that I don’t trust yer work, Drake, it’s just my job is to crash these on occasion and we don’t need that today.” Drake nodded with slight concern, “Much appreciated..”

A few short hours later, they landed at their destination. They made their way to the facility as Drake and Asta hung back, Asta booting up her laptop and activates her multiple weather radars. The other four make their way to the maintenance entry, Vasha breaking off towards the hangar. M slips in first, blending in with some shadows, and shifting shapes into one of the guards he saw pass by. He strides down the hallway, signaling the clear path.

Carmen and Lekir quickly sneak down the hallway to the room in question.

Lekir whispered, “So I hear you wanna name this thing Sir nibble-bottom? Or something? What kind of name is that?!” Carmen whispers back, “Oh my god thank you! Thats what I was saying!” M frowns and unlocks the next sentry point before the door to the Keter room, “Its name is Mister Nibblesworth. It’s very fuckin distinguished!” Lekir scoffs quietly, “Why not Rocky or Mittens?!” Carmen chimes in “Stormageddeon?” Lekir shakes her head, “No, some baby already named themselves that.”

Carmen uses one of the stolen codes to unlock the door. Lekir slips in as Vasha confirmed that she secured the helicopter. Lekir pauses and looks around, “Carmen, we got a problem. This room is empty.” Carmen frowned and stuck her head in and cursed, ”M! Check the schedules! They moved rooms! We need to see where they went!” The changeling grabbed a tablet from a wall guard console, going through it. “On it. Looks like they had issues with equipment decaying, they moved one floor up three rooms down the east wing.” Vasha blipped in. “Changing extraction point one floor up, east wing, three units over. Roger.” Asta checked the change in location, “Careful, there is a bit of an upstream gust coming from the south on that side of the building.” Vasha confirmed and made the adjustments on the controls.

The three changed course and raced up to the upper east wing, M transforming a few times into SCP-173, the concrete statue to scare away some newbie guards. They finally reach the door and heard equipment whirring like a saw. “M, do you see what experiments they have scheduled?” Carmen whispered, M checking the tablet, “Dismemberment and reconstruction research and observation.” Lekir scowled, “Reconstruction?? Are they building it? Or is it a healing thing?” Carmen shrugged, “Could be both for all we know. Too much on the file was redacted to be of any use.” M grinned and turned to Carmen, bouncing with anticipation, “Red! Can I Alucard them? Pleeease let me fuckin Alucard them!” He begged in a hushed whisper. Carmen facepalmed and waved him on, “Fine…. But no killing!” She hissed at him but he was already in his tentacled nightmare demon form, phasing through the wall, loudly growling out, “Hey kids! Who wants to see a dead body?!” followed by screams, violence and wet splatters then silence after a few moments. M opened the door for the two ladies, using a bone shard to pick his teeth. “Ugh, God Dammit M! I specifically told you absolutely no killing!! Dammit.. and dont tell me you were hungry! I already fed you breakfast!” Carmen crossed her arms, fuming at the changeling. Lekir stepped over some severed limbs, kicking an eyeball to the side. “Stand back, I’m going to create the exit!” She outstretched her hands and a sheet of ice quickly formed over the back wall and windows, giving a blast that shattered even concrete like glass. Carmen and M rushed over to the creature lying on its stomach on a table strapped down by metal restraints. One front paw was looking like it was pure bone as if the flesh was ripped away, yet the flesh was actually actively and rapidly growing onto the bones. A laser had been slicing the other front paw and a saw just severed a back leg by the knee, the limb falling to the floor and withering like a dead branch of driftwood. Patches of raw skin and damaged scales grew in patches of what looked like chemically burnt bog moss. Carmen checked the reactiveness of its eyes and found it to be completely unconscious. She winced and jerked back her gloved hand, the leather tips were eaten away by the acid and started to burn her fingertips. “Shit, they keep it doused in acid. Quick, get some heavy rubber gloves. We need to get these cuffs off of it. Is there any tarp or anything? The original transport plan needs changing, theres too much acid residue on it.” M finds some gloves and hands them to her, “They have this fuckin sling to take it from the vat to the table, looks like it is mobile. We could use it to get it to the chopper. From there we can fuckin find something at HQ to get it into one of the reinforced rooms.” He works on getting the back and hind restraints unhinged, Carmen works on the neck and front. “Huh. I thought it would be bigger.” M commented, bringing the mobile sling over to the table. Lekir helped reduce the acidic contact by a thin layer of frost over the places they needed their hands to be. “Are you seriously telling a dick joke right now?”

M made a show of looking offended, “I would never tell a dick joke about my sweet Mister Nathaniel T Nibblesworth Marshmallow Deathbringer Esquire the third…” Carmen groans, “You are not naming it that. Get that end and wrap it this way.” She secured her end of the sling straps. Vasha came up along side the blasted hole, “I heard you guys need a lift, your uber is here.” Lekir hopped in and helped reach across as M and Carmen guided the cargo sling on board. Once secured, a whole group of guards and military personnel rushed into the room. Lekir froze a barrier between them as Carmen was the last to climb into the aircraft. She turned to the guards and military and waved her hat with a grin, almost egging them on. Once the helicopter pulled away, they noticed more forces on the ground, “Drake, Asta, wheels up, they’re swarming!” Drake copied over the radio and the three sat back, panting as Vasha flew towards the HQ.

Carmen smirked, then grinned with a chuckle. M started to chuckle along with her. Soon all four were laughing. “I can’t believe we did that! Is it always like that?” Lekir laughed. Carmen sighed and still had her grin, “Yeah. It pretty much is. It’s the challenge that I usually look for. And this was admittedly a good one.” Vasha looked over her shoulder, “Next time you get the getaway chopper and I’ll steal the thing.” M chuckled, “Please, I saw you taking fuckin selfies with the unconscious guards you took out by the hangar. I was still hooked into the security feed long enough to see that.”

Once back at the HQ, M found a pallet jack and was able to move the creature to one of the reinforced rooms. Over the next few hours, as everyone else rested up and raided the kitchen and wine cellar in celebration, Carmen spent time with the sleeping creature. She had switched to her jeans and old tshirt with a leather workshop apron. She had on long rubber gloves, and had multiple boxes of baking soda, soda ash, a bucket of water and soap. She had spent hours neutralizing the acid and rinsing with soap and water.

M had come by to actually help out. “M, check this out. It has wings like a dragon, the tail too, and horns. But this bog moss is actually fur.” Carmen showed what she had already scrubbed.

As the acid was washed away, the regenerating had become more rapid. The skeletal paw was just missing scales and fur now. The nearly severed from limb had almost healed up and the hind leg was complete save some muscle still forming. “So the fuckin reconstruction was regenerative, not mechanic. Thats handy as fuck.” M mused, tilting his head, “I wonder if I could dye it a different color.. I ain’t feeling the red.” Carmen splashed him with a bit of water, “You’re not fashion dying this thing! Now get scrubbing, I haven’t gotten the hind end yet, under the tail. It’s too heavy for me to roll. I will need to get the underside soon.” M sighed and grabbed a sponge and a box of baking soda. “Yeah, yeah.. leave the ass end to me. I see what you did.” She tilted the head by the horns to reach a spot, her breasts just resting over the eyes.

“I honestly don’t know how long this sedation is going to last..” she started to say, as she felt the creature start to stir underneath her. She fell back onto her ass as the draconic eyes flash open. M had just lifted the tail and was begrudgingly scrubbing when the tuft ended tail suddenly pulled away from his grip and gave him a hard swat that sent him flying across the room.

Carmen yelled after him as she scrambled to her hooves. She watched the dragon like creature start to lift itself to all fours, shaking its head and letting out a menacing growl. It looks around slowly as M’s cackling could be heard somewhere around the far corner of the ceiling. Carmen dodged out of the way as she saw him leap from above at the creature, onto its back, tentacles wrapping around its limbs.

M was right about one thing, the size was smaller than once suspected. Once up and about, the creature could stand upright and be a foot or so taller than M himself. The creature easily plucked M from its back and slammed him onto the ground, near Carmen. M gritted his teeth in a shark like grin and just about did the same to the dragon creature. He fought and wrestled with the beast for roughly an hour. For the most part, M was thrown about like a rag doll while getting a few punches or so in, cackling like a kid at a fun park. M was just starting to tire a bit, and lunged towards it as it came close to swiping claws at Carmen, who had to dodge multiple times already. This time the claws contacted with M’s right shoulder and pec. M stumbled back and held his shoulder, wincing in disbelief.

“Ow?! What the ever loving fuck?!” He looked at his hand, covered in his blackish green shimmered red sludge-like blood. He stood up shakily and got hit in the opposite hip with a second swipe of the claws, knocking him down. M panted and got up on his hands and knees, watching the blood dribble a bit onto the floor in slight concern. Nothing has been able to touch let alone cut him like this. “M! Are you alright?!” He heard Carmen calling out to him as his vision felt off. His blurred vision saw her rushing towards him, he used his tentacles and effortlessly picked her up and out of the way, “Don’t you fuckin get near me! I got this!” Carmen protested but stayed where she was placed.

M ripped the rest of his shirt off and wobbled to his cloven hooves. The claw marks had cut into his flesh fairly deep and the wound edges started to look like the flesh was decaying like ash, only to have a glowing green glow follow it like slow burning embers as he healed himself, leaving fresh tender scars behind.

“Time to go nighty night, big guy. Sun’s lookin real low..” He growled, slowly picking up speed to tackle the beast. This action was met by the creature grabbing M’s head and slamming him back to the ground, sliding him along the now cracked concrete flooring. M coughed and wiped blood from his mouth, chuckling. “Okay.. okay. Time out.. I need a break.” He waved the creature off as he limped towards the exit, by Carmen. The creature roared at him, charging after the retreating changeling in deep bloodlust. Carmen looked around and instinctively grabbed a magazine that was on top of a moving box. Rolling it up, she gave a heavy swat to the creature’s muzzle as it passed her. The creature stopped in its tracks and looked at her in bewilderment. Carmen breathed heavy in anxiety, holding the rolled magazine like a sword. She gulps and shakes the magazine at it, “Yeah, thats right. Keep going and I’ll do it again! There’s no killing in my house!” The creature pinned its wolf-like ears back and sniffing her with its black canine nose, growling again. She squeaked and swatted it again. The beast scrunched its nose and stood upright, rubbing its muzzle with its hand.

“Did you actually hit me with a rolled up magazine?! Twice?!” It spoke with surprise. “You can talk?!” She screeched at it, taking a closer look at it…him. She looked him up and down, blushing and looking away quickly when realizing he was bipedal and very naked. “Why did you hit me with a rolled up magazine?!” She frowned, “You attacked us first when we were washing that acid off of you! You’re welcome, by the way!” The creature pointed towards the door where M had left. “I know why I attacked him! I wasn’t going after you! Thank you!” Carmen held onto the magazine tighter, “I protect my family! And if you go after him again, I’ll …I’ll call you a bad dog!” He growled low with a grin, looking at how her clothes were still wet from the washing, she already taken the apron off when M set her aside protectively. “You do and I may like it.” Carmen blushed again as he came closer. “Really now? Thats kinda kinky..” she smirked. “I’m Carmen Pondiego.” She tossed the magazine and held out her hand in greeting. He takes her hand and kisses it, “Always a pleasure, I’m Kiros Ashby.”

“And I cant fuckin believe that for five fuckin minutes I leave, I come back and you’re fuckin FLIRTING?! WHAT THE FUCK, Red?!” M stood in the doorway, covered in his bandages. He brushes his ginger hair out of his eyes and storms over to her, “What the hell did you do to him?! Did you somehow pour your horny monster fucker pheromones onto him or something?!” Kiros laughed, “That might have been me, I do have that effect on women.” M waves him off, “No, she’s just a horny ass bitch.” He calls everyone into the room, and once they all gathered, he paced with his hands behind his back, “A show of hands, who here has Carmen NOT fucked…” Only Asta blushed and shyly rose her hand, M pointed to the whole lot. “Case in point. They all knew her less than 48 FUCKIN HOURS!” Asta raises her hand again, “I’m just ace. I don’t go looking for sex…”

Kiros crosses his arms, raising an eyebrow at M, “Sounds like she knows what she likes and is respectful of preferences.. whats your excuse?” Carmen pipes up, “He’s just an asshole. And my brother in law.” Kiros points, nodding, “Gotcha. That actually makes sense. Now I have a bit of a favor to ask, if thats alright.. is there a shower I could borrow and possibly some pants?”

[juyomiao]

Hello^^

I came across only one last week and i found the plot to be very cute,,you're really doing a great job with it!!

You look like you know where you're going with it so i wanted to ask about how do you keep track of your ideas for the story and the characters, i personally use a notebook + notion but it tires me to transfer information from a support to another (digital to paper, paper to digital)everytime, i could have two good ideas but i can only use one so choosing becomes veryyyy hard, also sometimes i'd have an idea clear in my head but when it's time to put it into act, making convos (or tweets, but esp convos) seems veeery difficult taling into account characters personalities...do you have similar problems when writing? If so, how do you deal with them?

This is a hanbin smau im working on if you wanna check it out, id love to get your feedback even if i haven't posted much,

And no pressure to answer me, ik you haven't opened any q&a session but i wanted to try my luck and ask ><

Thank you and have a nice day/night!

hi omg i love getting long asks like this one ehehdhdhgheh

first of all tysm for liking only one !! 🫶🏻

when it comes to writing ,, im flattered that someone would think i have any idea of what im doing n organize my ideas in any way but , i .... do not . everytime i post a new chapter i usually wake up that day thinking 'holy shit its been almost a week since the last chapter i have to post something' n make everything a few hours before posting , i dont have a set idea of where im going with it (like i have the overall plot down n how it should develop but it already happened that it went in a completely different direction than what i was planning so) . all the ideas i get r stored in my brain , no writing down no anything just hoping i dont forget them ‼️‼️the voices in my head keep them company fr fr /j

for the characters personality ,, i usually just associate each character to one of my friends based on vibes n try to match their texting style etc , that makes it wayyy easier to come up with convos n keep their personalities consistent !!

i do get the problem of having a set idea but not being able to actually work with it tho , thats why a lot of my old fics i never posted were just ,, abandoned in my google docs :')) i dont rlly know how to deal with that , i usually just give up on everything when i cant get to do it just like i want it to be 😭😭😭 thankfully that hasn't happened with only one (yet)

ur smau already looks amazing i cant wait for the chapters ?!???!!! pls add me to the taglist i wanna know what happens 🙏🏻🙏🏻

i hope my answers were coherent enough my brain is like . fried rn gnight

[tayne-dot-exe]

I almost never interact with anyone on here but I want people to be able to Know me, so I'm trying to get into actually blogging and just spilling my thoughts and what I'm up to… its kinda weird cos I use to pretty much only have online friends and discord chats were like my main spot but I'm just not really checking servers as much and most of my friends I'm no longer at the place where I'm telling them every thought I have anymore? I want those kind of connections which is why I'm still putting it out here in case anyone here wants to go from parasocial to social, but most of it has started to feel like, not interesting enough to message any person or groupchat in particular, so I have started to prefer just waiting until the next time I see someone in person and having a long catch up chat, letting the conversation go to whats been on my mind. But thats prob due to actually going out to do a lot more social activities and trying to HAVE people I do things with irl, even though it's still pretty frustrating that I feel like I can't find the kind of person I want to build like a super codependent friendship with…

Like I think I've been trying to make friends the way that people date where I'm just meeting up with someone from lex or bumble, and I keep finding new ways that things just Aren't Working for me, I have started trying to just be pragmatic about it…. It's one thing to try to find people who are interested in the type of activities I want to do with people- thrifting and nature walks are like sooo general, but I'm going insane from people saying they want to do something and then having so many logistical problems actually going… I know I'm super privileged that I'm just free after 4pm and have a car but like… I'm tired of doing sooooo much to accommodate hangouts just cos I want someone to go to things with like driving 40 minutes extra each way to you to pick you up…. or like if you can't tell me it's gonna be another hour before you're ready to leave your house…. I live in the suburbs of a super big city and there should be gay people everywhere but I can't find anyone within 15 minutes of me who is not too ADHD to actually make plans??? And then on top of just being willing AND able to go do the stuff I wanna do you're telling me I have to build a 1 on 1 rapport with people and sometimes we're just gonna find each other annoying??

Anyway I've actually joined a ton of groups that I'm pretty happy with adding a bunch of stuff to my calendar to just run into people and at least trying to find these connections irl if everyone on lex is a bum. Biggest thing is master naturalist where I've been going to tons of moth nights and bioblitzes and making friends with educated older women, kinda funny this parks and wildlife guy who is like the cult leader of the area keeps talking to me about on cinema at the cinema cos my inaturalist is also Tayne. And I found a new lgbt social group that has some interesting people but I wish was better at posting their casual activities cos I wanna just meet people at the things that are not video games and support groups. And I wanna get a little more involved with this climate action group I did a book club with. And I found a place where I can do Tai Chi actually guided by Chinese people, and that the place also does language/culture classes for adults so I will probably sign up for that in the spring. I'm even giving "the club" a try since we have one of very few lesbian bars in the country, but I think I'm just not interested in drinking with strangers where it's hard to converse and I don't care about most of the music (love dance music but even if it was my music idk how much I care about hearing it in it's natural environment), I'm giving it my best shot but I really don't have the clubber's spirit, I like the idea of dressing up for the club more than actually going… (honestly i think most ppl I've been trying to take to nature walks like the idea of being someone who goes out in nature more than actually going too)

But like its kinda crazy I'm obsessed with making lists of stuff I want to do, and for a long time it was creative projects that I dread having to actually do but I want to be finished, and during quarantine I started thinking like, what are the things I would do if I didn't feel like I had "homework", like if I was free from the stuff I was putting pressure on myself, and I've already done and have lined myself up to do a bunch of these now… I'm very happy with the adult I've settled in to being, and I want to meet other people who are too. I've found that I am such a busy body and love having things planned where I get to go hang out and meet people!