#but that was really good and even if it’s lowkey retconning that makes me want to rewatch the series with the thought that sutehk is always

[jstorfancam]

rtd really said. hey you know that thing I said in my very first episode of doctor who (2005)? just gonna circle back to that one

[fandom-geek]

anyway just realised i completely forgot to make a post abt completing the first part of the arl of redcliffe quest and the broken circle, so thoughts!

...i had completely forgotten that alistair does know who his dad is.

on that note, alistair does say that duncan also knew, but it's not entirely clear if alistair told him (and duncan pretended not to know already), if the reverend mother told him (and he pretended not to know already), or if duncan was actually transparent about already knowing but just didn't say how.

alistair also gave me the quest about finding goldanna, which again makes me think abt fiona. when he eventually finds out that his mother is actually an elven mage who is alive, he's gaining a living mother and losing a sister who... doesn't want anything to do with him (from what i recall), but is still alive and has her own kids. which isn't necessarily much, but when alistair's spent most of his life thinking that she's his only relative, that's some complicated grief to have. especially if he finds out that duncan did know abt him and promised to look after him secretly (as per the calling).

anyway - back to the quests!

defending redcliffe was. a pain. the mayor did not survive, despite me turning on easy mode. i was tempted to try a few times to get the cutscenes for "you saved everyone" but i hate the long walk between the two fights so fuck that. rip mayor dude, you were decent.

the redcliffe sideplots! hi bella and kaitlyn! i not-so-immediately showered them in gold so they can both yeet away to denerim. apparently i may have fucked up getting kaitlyn's "marry bann teagan" ending by not buying the sword, but i also gave her a ton of money so who knows. we'll see when i get to the epilogue. also yeeted the blacksmith's daughter back to her dad, so i've finished all the redcliffe side quests i actually care about that are the most significant.

you know how i was complaining abt veilguard because of eurogamer's review of the press demo the other day? there's a good chance that plots like bella and kaitlyn will be non-existent there given the "can't really interact with any random city npcs". so. that'll be a fuckin tragedy if that's the case. same for the whole of redcliffe, actually - even if they're not questgivers or lack extended dialogue, it's a town that actually feels like a town thanks to the variety of npcs you have.

redcliffe castle wasn't too painful to get through, and it's actually pretty interesting in hindsight of the later games. connor, unlike wynne (who we shall meet shortly), cole and anders, is kinda our foremost example of an abomination actually living up to their name. and the boy is creepy, even if him making bann teagan dance is lowkey hilarious. sorry teagan.

i had completely forgotten how alistair goes from "he's an abomination, we must kill him D:" to "...we can save him? oh thank fuck". it's pretty interesting that despite being raised as a templar against his will, he'll repeat the chantry's stance at first but he's immediately pretty glad if you offer a reasonable alternative - no matter how much it stands in opposition to the chantry.

broken circle time!

it's very funny how your introduction to the templars is "all the mages are corrupted and lost to demons.... we must kill them" only to immediately go through and realise they've managed to clear a section, courtesy of wynne and her spirit of faith. i reblogged a piece of meta abt this a while ago, but this quest is nowhere near as morally grey as some ppl make it out to be. the templars are practically buffoons (with some having the excuse of being tortured) who do literally nothing to solve the situation, while the mages are actively risking their lives to save each other. cullen is just... urgh. it says something that wynne is willing to defend him by saving he's been tortured, and the fucker doubles down on his "murder all mages, even the kids" rhetoric. i really hate that bioware retconned his endings from da:o.

it's kinda a shame that despite alistair telling you that the templars are addicted to lyrium, it never actually comes up in the broken circle. cullen being tortured and in withdrawal would be a bit more interesting to explore, but idk. would it be insane of me to draw a parallel between a tortured cullen thirsting for blood and a contemporary usa jumping to indiscriminate warfare over 9/11? .... yeah? ok, fair enough

wynne, my beloved! i hadn't realised how blatant it is almost from when you meet her that she's been possessed by a spirit to help her keep working past her own literal death. she also immediately adds a much calmer adult voice to the party, even if i wanted to yeet morrigan into the abyss with the "survival of the fittest [and none of the circle mages are it]" bullshit she kept spewing when we first met wynne. darling, please get over your elven-god-mother's brainwashing some time this game, it's deeply frustrating

(also, morrigan gave me her quest to steal flemeth's grimoire while murdering her mum! wooooooo!)

the fade is the fade. mildly less tedious with a guide in hand, but annoying as hell. i conceptually get what bioware was going for - the companions' nightmares and the shapeshifting are both fascinating narratively and gameplay-wise, but the trudge to get there is frustrating as hell. there's a line btwn purely linear levels and forcing ppl to slowly backtrack a ton, and this doesn't achieve anywhere near the balance it needs. though it does reinforce that the mages are significantly more willing to save each other, regardless of the risks to themselves.

oh, and it always cracks me up how much weisshaupt looks like ostagar. i know they only had so many tilesets for decorating, but the main part looks practically identical to the raised platform/lower hall where you meet alistair and later having the meeting with loghain/cailan.

i burnt through health poultices like no one's business on this level, so the final boss was fun. not actually that bad, but i had to seriously micromanage the party's healing post-fade onwards. plus preventing him from corrupting the mages is hilariously easy once you've got the litany.

managed to run into zevran on the way back to redcliffe (and stopped by honnleath too), so now i've got another rogue and shale. i get there's plenty of worldbuilding reasons for you to have less mages than rogues/warriors but with my poor cousland also being a rogue, this party feels insanely rogue heavy.

camping was also pretty funny, bc wynne basically threw a ton of her major dialogue conversations at me back to back. alistair also snogged my cousland despite much teasing, so that was fun. speaking of things i had forgotten, i had definitely blanked on zevran's backstory in the crows frequently involving torture as a training method. wonder if they'll include that in veilguard since one of your companions is the grandson of the head crow (i fucking doubt it).

back to redcliffe - not much to say except the fade section here is pretty interesting. it's heartbreaking that saving him means damning him to the circle but hey, at least he's only stuck there for the next seven years! given his age, he probably doesn't even go through the harrowing before the circles dissolve.

[peachviz]

I finished Picard so you know what that means. It’s a Picard wrap up post:

(this one may contain hot takes bc ik the series is split on mixed reviews)

Season 1 - beautiful. Made me ugly cry. Sucks that i saw Data die twice (but if i had a nickel for every time that happened…)

- Picard still dealing with PTSD of being Borg i love that continuity

- Seven is a badass but seven did not have to have character development at the risk of killing Icheb. Out of all the deaths in Season 1, that one was so pointless. But given the previous actor of Icheb’s conduct i think that may have been a benefactor idk im not a conspiracy theorist

- Data has daughters??? We love to see it

- Narek was useless we could have done without the male manipulation

- Riker being a happy dad (idk wtf was going on in season 3. We didn’t have to forget him making pizza. He and Deanna always have a kiss and makeup storyline can’t we just have the Riker that makes pizza and smiles)

- I cried the most with this season, out the gate just full on ugly cried. Data getting a beautiful ending, Picard overcoming death, Seven returning, good elements

So then why was Season 2 lowkey a clusterfuck. Random and confusing at times

- seven is still a badass, but oh no Star Trek is starting to suffering from Star Wars syndrome. It’s the one where they overcorrect their wrongs by making women bad asses, but then that’s all they are, badasses with suffering

- Q dying was dumb sorry im with de lancie on this one they could have involved Q without the weird dying storyline just kiss and make up, Picard “you matter” “all gods have favorites, and you’re one of mine” too much yapping not enough hugging like come on (i did love that line)

- Seven and Raffi are the couple of the season

- Elnor dying almost made me turn it off

- I found Rios boring sorry

- Wesley is in his River Song era, really didn’t understand it but ok I’ll bite

- Laris and alter ego not Laris was also boring really don’t understand it and did not see chemistry with Picard and clearly pointless bc she never shows up again at the end of s3 (once again too many cooks in the kitchen with too many characters. Star Trek is still suffering from that thing they do where they introduce a character and then phase them out or quit talking about them abruptly)

- Jurarti showing the Borg queen the power of friendship and love…….just for the Borg queen to retcon all that in season 3 but I had to sit through that was unbearable

Idk overall I didn’t really like Season 2. I thought it was the weakest season with the weakest storylines and characters. And as much as it pains me to say this, Beltran was right (just threw up in my mouth a little) in rejecting a Chakotay involvement. It’s just unnecessary fascism and he was right Prodigy is the superior storyline for Chakotay

Lastly, Season 3

- I just want to start out by saying I liked it I genuinely thought it was gonna be a lot worse than it was bc of the way people were so split on it

- I’m not mad about Soji not being in this season. While I feel like it is necessary for her and Data to connect and finally have that interaction, it would have been overshadowed by everything else going on in this season. Same with Elnor. There wasn’t really a place for them.

- Sidney and Jack are kinda cute af a Picard/LaForge pairing would be something to see

- They lowkey sidelined Seven, but once again she was getting overshadowed

- Not really thrilled with what happened with Ro Laren. I’m not even gonna get into it bc I’ll just get pissed off.

- Jack did read as a self insert at times BUT I found him compelling. I don’t really find him a Mary sue, people said the same thing about Wesley way back when too. Idk Beverly is just blessed with arrogant perfect children

- His storyline was the finale after all the show was about Picard and Picard passing on the baton and what he learned. The theme was constant, it made sense with the whole Locutus storyline. Maybe that’s controversial but idc I liked it. Picard would have been a good father.

- There wasn’t enough focus on anyone else, but I think that’s was at the request of Patrick Stewart. There were terms he agreed on to return it’s in his book. He withheld on having the entire TNG cast return because he wanted something fresh and something focused on Picard. And honestly? There wasn’t room, everything was overshadowed by this storyline.

- After this, we don’t have to touch the Borg. We are so fed on Borg shit we don’t ever have to come back to the Borg. I’m so over the Borg

- Wish the changelings had kept their old form. It was cooler. I miss Odo. Rip René

- We are still underutilizing Worf but I forgot he can’t have too many scenes when Riker’s around.

- I know it hurts to see something change from what you used to know and love. I just don’t want to deal with the same discourse as I do in the Star Wars fandom. It’s exhausting and I miss civil discourse. There are some critiques to be had for new Trek but I’m always wanting new content. Maybe it’s time to explore a new ship and crew. No callbacks to old characters idk. There’s an edge to starfleet that has changed over time that I find interesting, that I found interesting in DS9.

Overall, it brings interesting concepts. It’s not all perfect, but it’s starting a conversation. Some of the gore was unnecessary and there were a few deaths that didn’t have to happen as a literary device. Im really hoping once the Picard movie is off the ground, we can have a lighthearted mission or something bc bro yall clowned insurrection saying it was “just another TNG episode” like we don’t need that rn

As much as I love the Janeway content and mentions, and appreciate that voyager fans are finally being fed there is so much untapped content in DS9. I just don’t understand why we can’t incorporate it. I’m begging you on my hands and knees, writers, please please please everyone wants it give the people what they want please please I need to see Kira I need to see Bashir I need to see Garak like come onnnnnn

Most of this is pretty scrambled bc it’s a lot to process bc each season is its own storyline.

Current Captain ranking:

1. Sisko

2. Janeway

3. Picard

4. Pike

5. Seven of Nine

6. Kirk

7. Freeman

8. Riker

9. Shaw

Current Series Rankings

1. DS9

2. TOS

3. SNW

4. TNG

5. PICARD

6. LOWER DECKS

7. VOYAGER

Some changes in the rankings for both. Picard brought the TNG ranking up from last place. Voyager sank lower for me because the longer I sat with it, the more I realized I didn’t connect with it like I did the others.

(THESE RATINGS WILL CHANGE SIGNIFICANTLY ONCE I FINISH PRODIGY)

now to finish prodigy, start discovery and then take a break before enterprise

[solar-halos]

i’m about to have a hater moment

basically i wanna write another umbrella academy fanfic. so obviously this got me thinking about the umbrella academy. and then this got me thinking about how they absolutely destroyed our girl allison. like they really said let’s have one of the very few poc characters we have on the show assault another character. and then they really had diego tell allison “i don’t think the rest of our (white) siblings really understood how hard it was for us in the 60s” without actually fucking showing us the hardships diego faced for being a man of color in the 60s. like what? they covered the civil rights movement which now that im thinking about it was probably just bc they had to like if they could get away w skipping it i 100% believe that they would. diego literally called grace Mom (bc that’s his Mom) and all grace did was smile at him funny and go “you have no fucking game.” like okay writers producers directors WHOEVER at the umbrella academy maybe if u wanted to show how hard it was for diego in the 60s u could have had grace go wayyy harder on him and had him kicked out of the party and then it’d be this whole thing as he and lila try to sneak back in but nooo apparently retconning everything was the way to go

this rant was also partly inspired by the stranger things controversy. like i had a whole long post about this that i deleted but i had literally never heard anyone talk about racism in this fandom (to this degree!) until argyle’s actor wasnt invited back onto s5. then all of a sudden posts that are like “lucas doesn’t have an actual developed storyline like the white characters” are getting SO many notes, and it’s good that they are bc more people are actually paying attention, but did it seriously take a comedic relief character that got randomly introduced in the latter half of the shows running to get yall to care about racism? and if anything the fact that argyle is the comedic relief best friend to the white main character who is high all the fucking time is racist in itself but whatever. that show had so much potential it’s such a shame s5 doesn’t exist

anyway i also made a reallyyy long post about the umbrella academy portion of the rant but now that the last season is so close (like months and months away) im lowkey hoping they actually do retcon that scene?? i mean allison and luther’s relationship in general is to showcase how these characters didn’t have a normal upbringing and the assault scene expanded on that but the aftermath was handled so poorly. “im sorry” “nah it’s ok don’t worry about it” guys i know we were in a time crunch but if ur gonna have something so heavy u can’t just fucking dismiss it like that. even ella enchanted had a scene where the prince was like “kiss me” “okay” “i’m not giving you an order… just a request” “i know.” like im fucking sorry but if ur gonna make allison go thru that sort of arc u need to do it right. but also i’m a very negative person (cringe) so take all my complaints with a grain of salt

[nolongerapileofashprobably]

I SAW YOU WANT TOTK FIRST IMPRESSIONS I HAVE SO MANY.

Rauru?? Such a good design 10/10 character and voice. Extremely worried about his backstory because it's just a liiiiittle too close to retconning and I despise when games do that and zelda usually just 'yes and's itself.

Zelda looks so good too! And link! And our favourite nerds! Don't know how happy she is with being back in a ceremonial worship dress tho lol. Really hoping she doesn't pull a skyward sword zelda.

Hyrule is nigh unrecognisable. It's struck a perfect balance between knowing it like the back of my hand and being completely lost. Like I know where things SHOULD be. I know where to find the biggest points. When tf did that get here. I SWEAR there's way more deep ponds than there used to be. I'm in love again already.

And it might just be the fact that I've played so many loz games and botw just yesterday, but Link feels so incredibly entrenched in the world. Intertwined. Bound up in every inch of it. Everyone knows his name, they respect him and care for him if they don't know him personally. I recognise places and symbols and cutscene locations. It feels right to scramble all over things and talk to everyone and vanish into the grass and no one bats an eye.

It's only been a few hours but totk is just incredible. Even if I have to run everywhere again XD.

Just. YES!!!

I feel the SAME WAY about Hyrule. I’ve played botw so many times that I feel like I should know where shit is but then I’m like “wait this rock formation is higher than normal, wait when did that get there, oh my god what is THAT, hey I recognize this!!!”

Getting to go near Hyrule castle and not hear panic-inducing piano music is something I should have been prepared for but it still messed me up.

Hyrule isn’t this desolate wasteland with barely any civilizations. It’s got people, it’s got structure, there’s teams and a whole system going on. And it. It makes me SO happy.

Link and Zelda really did all that. GOD!!!!

God this game is fantastic. I’m getting major ss Zelda vibes 😂 so I’m envisioning she’s going to be just out of reach the entire game (but who knows!!!)

I’m wondering if botw is just going to be in its own timeline to make up for them lowkey retconning stuff LMAO

Thank you so much I love hearing everyone’s impressions of this game it is so so wonderful

[lab-trash]

I meannn... for Mighty Med it really depends what you consider filler. It's only 2 seasons, I really do think it's worth watching all of them. But I suppose here are the ones I regularly skip when rewatching.

(I'm using the Disney+ numbering system, which means that the pilot is two parts)

S1E3: Frighty Med. I like it a lot and it establishes some dynamics, but it's not the most important.

S1E4: I Normo. This one might actually be considered important, but it's also lowkey retconned later so whatever.

S1E15: Growing Pains. The B plot makes me uncomfy, and the A plot doesn't have a lot of bearing on the show. But, if you wanna see Oliver as a four year old, forty year old, and ninety-four year old, go ahead and watch it.

S1E18: Fantasy League of Heroes: I actually watch the Kaz and Skylar plot, but I don't watch the Oliver plot. It's about football. The main relevant thing in this episode is seeing how good a hero Skylar is.

S1E20: Guitar Superhero. This one is... iffy. Oliver and Kaz help create a super hero and it shows some of Skylar's ideals, but overall not super important. I recommend watching it, but you dont Need to.

S1E23: Are You Afraid Of The Shark. Its just. This is filler. It's one of the only episodes that I'll be like "go ahead, skip it, who gives a shit." Horace has a shark. He hates his boss. There, you got the gist. I don't even remember the kaz plot.

S1E24: The Pen is Mighty Med-ier than the Sword. Another that I can't remember the b plot. Oliver’s plot this time though. Couldn't tell ya if you forced me.

(Others you could afford to miss but I wouldn't exactly recommend it is E6, E8, E11, E12, E16, E19, E21. I would watch them, but you could skip them if you really Really wanted to. Read the synopsis before deciding.)

As for Season 2. I watch most of these, but you're asking about filler and season 2 has more distinct episodes.

S2E8. It talks a lot about their potential futures, which are disproven completely by lref so it nearly doesn't matter. This one I definitely think is worth watching though.

S2E9. Another I think is worth watching, it shows a lot of the dynamic between Oliver and his friends.

S2E10. This one's completely fine to skip, I wouldn't even judge. Any progress that happens is undone.

S2E11. If you like the idea of Oliver being trans ABSOLUTELY WATCH THIS ONE. If you don't care about that, you can go ahead and skip it.

S2E12. Kaz goes on a date with toxic girl. Really funny, it used to be my favourite.

S2E13. If you like Wallace and Clyde, definitely worth watching. Despite my cringe, I still revisit it. Its a good one, but not super plot important for Season 2. If we're talking Season 1 plot, very important. But Season 2? No.

S2E15. It's not the most important. It's confusing to me, honestly. Good episode. But okay to skip.

And that's it, I'd say. Again, Mighty Med is just below 50 episodes and I absolutely think it's worth watching all of it. I love Mighty Med.

Anyway, for LREF. You wanna skip episodes unrelevent to the plot? Here ya are.

Need for Speed. The most that happens is that the mission suits are made. That's it.

Coming Through in the Clutch. I hate this episode actually.

Sheep-Shifting. I like it, but not terribly important.

Game of Drones. I like it, but not terribly important.

They Grow Up So Fast. It's not bad, but definitely not important, especially not as much as the penultimate episode should be.

Hey Lab Rats/Mighty Med/Elite Force fandom,, what are the essential episodes to watch so I can skip the fillers?

[piccolina-mina]

Our girl is thriving this season, but what the fuck is this Wyatt plot? I need your thinks about this one. I just knew you'd be six posts in on this by now. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

*sighs* For fk's sake, nonny. I don't even like talking about it because I get ranty.

What do you want me to say? Honestly, everything you can imagine I would feel about this, you're probably right. Because you know, I'm that b*tch always getting ranty about racism and stuff.

In short, I hate it. I think it's unnecessary, tone-deaf, random, pointless, lowkey offensive, and illogical. I legitimately find it triggering AF. And it doesn't make sense.

It's Unnecessary. There is a fraction of a chance that it will connect to something more significant, but even if that's the case, I'm confident that end result or connection could've taken place without this random reform racist Wyatt storyline. This series has struggled enough as it is properly utilizing all of its primary characters as well as providing them with decent screentime and arcs. It literally makes no sense to spend any of that time that could be used elsewhere on primary characters on a recurring guest star.

This isn't actually about Rosa, it's about Wyatt. Following up on the previous point, this specific arc caters to Wyatt. Revolves around Wyatt. Rosa is just a passive participant and vessel for this Wyatt storyline. So again, the arc itself is about a recurring character. At least when they did something similarly bringing back Cam to siphon time and arcs away from its main cast they found ways to implement it better and tied her to multiple main characters, so it wasn't a total waste.

The intended Wyatt/Rosa parallel is illogical. I know what they're intending to do with this storyline, drawing parallels between Rosa's experience coming back from the dead after ten years and trying to make sense of that and atone for things before and having this second chance to make things right and go down the right path and so forth and Wyatt losing his memory and his racist ways and having to reconcile with who he was to who he can be and all of that. I understand the concept they're trying to sell. It just doesn't work. Rosa's addiction is not equivalent to Wyatt's racism and violence. Her mental illness isn't either. It's dangerous to invite the comparasions with this storyline.

It's not successful redemption. True redemption is Wyatt knowing and remembering his actions and then trying to atone for them. It's not the convenience of amnesia wiping out his memory only giving him distance from his actions rather than really facing up to them. Because of the amnesia, to Wyatt, it's like he's hearing about another person. It's a cop out. He doesn't Actually have to do the work to redeem himself or atone or learn or grow. IF we're supposed to compare it to Rosa, she knew what she did and remembers and knows how she hurt her loved ones or whatever and she's actively trying to make amends for that as part of her program... a program that Wyatt isn't working or anything BTW.

They've contradicted themselves too much and are rewriting their own work and thus twisting everything up just to make this storyline work and it still doesn't. The timeline is all fkd up... what they established already all of it..The Longs were racist before Kate's death. Kate was racist. To suggest that a 10+ amnesiac blackout clean slates and erases all of Wyatt's racism is just wrong. As in it literally doesn't even make any sense. That is not how the amnesia works but they keep playing both sides of it trying to make it work. To sell us what they're claiming, he would have to have ALL of his memories wiped and have forgotten who he was completely.

Wyatt is behaving like he's shocked by racism in this town but they're also trying to argue that he was born into it. Wyatt was surrounded by racists and his friends come from racist families but he's acting like the very concept of him ever being ingratiated in it is some huge surprise. Wyatt looks affronted by things like Confederate flags. Wyatt being steeped in and surrounded by racism predates his amnesia period.

Kyle mentioned that line about Wyatt putting Whites Only on water fountains, and it sounded like a school prank. It also sounded like something Kyle was reminding Rosa of as if she was alive when that incident happened. Therefore, Wyatt was doing racist stuff before she died. Kyle would've been out of school by then so how else would he know that or why would he bother retaining it?

IF Wyatt and Rosa really were friends before (which holy retcon), then it makes no real sense that he would get psychopathically angry about his "friend" who does drugs getting into a car accident with his sister who does drugs. He would've mourned them both not jumped to severe racism and violence. But both he and Jasmine's family (who are MIA for all of this) did that... jumped to racism. So was Wyatt indoctrinated by his family or indoctrinated by message boards and shit? And if Wyatt and Rosa were friends than why was Kate such a racist bitch to Rosa?

They're backdrafting history JUST to make this storyline that we don't need with a character who isn't even a main one to work.

By not actually addressing that Wyatt has to unlearn racism and giving him an out through amnesia, there is the very realistic issue of that latent racism to come out at any given time. What happens when he's drunk? What happens when he's really angry at a POC?

Tying Wyatt's redemption with his clear affection for Rosa is again dangerous and irresponsible. I know we would all like to think that love is the way and through love it can heal racism, but that puts the responsibility on the disenfranchised person to be "lovable." Because if Wyatt WAS friends with Rosa once then that means the second Rosa did something unlovable she was just another *insert racist slur of choosing* right? It means that there's a possibility that if his feelings for Rosa dwindle or things go sideways in some way there's a chance that he could revert back to those racist ways. Loving Rosa(linda) and pinning all of his wanting to be better on her because of her makes his actively learning to be anti-racist conditional. Right now he's not doing this for him. He's doing it because of Rosa.

This entire storyline has placed the burden of forgiveness on Rosa, his victim. Without him ever having to actually make amends. It's this turn the other cheek BS that means there's nothing too big or harmful that can't result in forgiveness. It relies on Rosa and all that she represents to extend an inhumane level of mercy and grace to their tormentor and oppressor that was never once extended to them. It's such a consistent and problematic thing projected on disenfranchised parties that ONLY benefits the majority and makes them feel good. It's a narrative of meeting someone halfway when the playing field was uneven and the minorities are in actuality doing more work and making a longer trek. Halfway and meeting in the middle only works if both sides were even. They are not. It's the reaching across the aisle both sidesms when one side was clearly and actively more harmful than the other and than calling that peace and equity. It is not.

This storyline was meant to scintillate some viewers with this "what if" notion and teach others a meaningful lesson or be this poorly thought out gateway to exploring a complex storyline but it came at the expense of other demographics who actively have to deal with racist crap. And because of their problematic approach what is simply "just entertainment" to some who has the luxury of not having to think about it beyond that, is just gross and insanely triggering and uncomfortable to others. The others who deal with the reality of the subject at hand.

They wrote themselves into a corner with Wyatt so trying to dig him out of that no matter the cost or logic is absurd. This storyline could've worked better if Wyatt's racism didn't also include conscious, constant, extreme violence. But they spent all of this time making Wyatt the face of violent racism and now are trying to redeem him with no real effort. He wasn't just using slurs or making microaggressions. He wasn't some insensitive or aloof white person. He is a murderer. He has killed people. He technically murdered Liz in cold-blood. He knew she was in the crashdown when he shot up the place. The lights were still on. He beat up Arturo so badly he nearly killed him well after his friends even stopped. He attacked and intended to kill Rosa. And his handiwork was a constant thing, enough for Jenna to comment on it. And now we're supposed to ignore all of that because he has amnesia and has puppy dog eyes?

The fact that we can entertain (and for some succeed) Wyatt in all of his hot white dudeness' redemption after everything he has done slips into the inherent racism of society in the first place and is enraging. Because systemically and culturally and inherently society will bend over backwards to find a way to absolve a hot white guy no matter his actions. Flint and Noah couldn't get this type of redemption... So their intended storyline about evolving from racism STILL plays into the racist structures set up in society.

And because some people like it, there's this slippery territory of NO everyone who genuinely enjoys this aren't racist for enjoying it. But yes, this entire storyline and how it is playing out is at the very least racially insensitive.

In order for this storyline to work they would actually have to show Wyatt doing the work. They don't have enough time to dedicate to such a delicate storyline. It's been a C and D filler storyline with 45 second to a minute scenes. That's not enough time to explore this properly. We would've needed to see Wyatt returning home from the hospital. We would've needed to see Wyatt with his friends and it not feeling right and his discomfort. We would've needed to see Wyatt going through his yearbook and googling himself and the horror and disgust he felt. We would need to see this through his eyes. But we didn't have the time for that and we wouldn't have anyway because he's not a main character. We only get Wyatt through Rosa's eyes and they haven't even dedicated enough time to that for it to work. Rosa isn't conflicted at all. She didn't struggle to forgive him. She was reduced to a school girl with a crush and an insane level of grace and they just threw that at us with no buildup whatsoever. I don't know where Rosa's head is and how she got to this to place. Not really. And the only thing working about this is the chemistry between two actors who are allegedly dating so of course there's chemistry.

It literally feels like another instance of a favorite actor being shoehorned into a storyline just for the hell of it. Just because they didn't want to let Dylan go or something. Just to give him something else to do.

[thegodcomplcx]

For the Doctor Who themed ask game:

I want to hear all of your incredibly detailed and thought out opinions on all of the questions 👿🔪

300 word minimum per question (lol jk)

oooooo boy. strap in for a long one boys. i answered a couple already, but i'll do the rest here.

(2) what was the first entire series you watched/remember ?

series 1. the revamp, baby. the first ep i watched was from series 5, but i was a completionist even when i was 11, so i started the series from the beginning. (didn't know about classic who back then, or i would've been in for a ride lmao)

(5) any complaints about the show? (20) if you could change anything about the show, what would it be?

i'm gonna combine these two bc i feel like theyre the same kinda. i kinda wish it had a more consistent lore? sldkjfds okay i know this is a ridiculous request and like obviously if something shite happens ppl want to retcon it. or just the fact that it's been going on for 60 some odd years and things slip through the cracks. but i think SO much about the show changes when the showrunner changes, and i know thats a good thing that keeps the show fresh, but it would be interesting to see it all weave together just a tad more cohesively. idk i don't have any REAL complaints overall. doctor who, my beloved.

(6) nuwho or classic who ? why ?

nuwho only because i haven't seen enough of classic to have an informed opinion.

(7) the tenth doctor or the fourth doctor ? why ?

ten. see above.

(8) favorite outfit of the doctor's ? why ?

literally a flawless outfit. it's simple but so fucking effective. first of all, it just looks good. it's reflective of twelve as a character i think, and it has a charmingly classic feel. twelve's era really felt like we were maturing and taking a step away from the doctor that was a young, foppish, dandy, and this outfit SHOWS it. that flash of red in the coat makes me go FERAL. stunning. showstopping. thirteen also looks good in it. (second place goes to eleven's first outfit tho. cus of the nostalgia)

(9) least favorite outfit of the doctor's ? why ?

i like all of them tbh! is it cheating to say six's technicolor dream coat?

(10) favorite companion ?

martha jones. i'm so normal about it, though. (uhhh i've spoken about why i love her at length, and i don't feel the need to elaborate on it here. if you want to hear more thoughts about martha tho lmk i'll make another post)

(11) favorite romance involving a doctor? (12) what is your favorite romance involving a companion?

i'm also gonna answer these together. OBVIOUSLY tenmartha takes the cake. hence the url. i love their fucked up little relationship. i love the way the characters parallel each other and the narrative implications of this. i both think it was depicted perfectly in canon AND that martha jones and the doctor should have fucked on screen. the unrequited aspect is so gutwrenching and compelling. i love it and hate it. i also think ten was in love with martha for real in canon, so i must be fucking delusional. tenmartha hits too good tho.

i'm also a fan of thoscei in all iterations bc i love narrative foils <3

(16) who is your favorite doctor/companion duo ?

take a fucking guess. (tenmartha, my beloved) (11amy close second)

(17) what is your favorite alien species ?

hmmmmm. i don't have super strong opinions on this. maybe those like record keeper boys from demons in punjab? it was a super interesting concept for the doctor to be making assumptions that these guys were evil just to have the script flipped on her.

(18) what is your favorite alien planet ?

gallifrey, i suppose. that burnt orange sky.

(19) cybermen or daleks ?

daleks! they're lowkey kinda funny. there's that scene in daleks of manhattan where two daleks have a little office gossip moment in the sewers talking about how dalek sec is off his shits. it's hilarious. i also own a couple dalek shirts lmao.

[queenlua]

Ace Attorney case tier list

so, in the past year, i finished replaying games 1 through 5 for the first time in forever, and also played game 6 for the first time ever

so here’s where i ruthlessly rank each of the cases based on that most scientific metric of all, My Opinions:

OPENING CASES

S-tier: Turnabout Trump (4-1).  I already knew this case, and I still gasped with surprise when Phoenix showed up, and when Kristoph showed his true colors, and when Apollo realized OH SHIT OH FUCK I REALLY AM ACCUSING MY BOSS OF MURDER HUH... what a wonderful, splashy, shockingly concise case to open up the post-O.G. trilogy world.  Marvelous.

A-tier: Turnabout Memories (3-1).  Seeing Mia Fey (finally!) in action is a long-awaited delight; seeing Phoenix being a total dumbass was an unexpected-yet-perfect and fitting delight.

B-tier: The First Turnabout (1-1).  Solid lil’ case with some conventional-but-well-executed humor.  I’ve got a soft spot for Larry Butz.

C-tier: The Lost Turnabout (2-1), The Foreign Turnabout (6-1).  The former’s fine but a little forgettable; the latter has some fun gags (Payne’s ridiculous new outfit, dude absolutely shredding on the mandolin, etc) but is marred by how uh... kinda silly the game’s core conceit is, lol

E-tier: Turnabout Countdown (5-1).  The context surrounding this introduction is just sloppy (badly handled in media res + let’s lowkey retcon game 4 isn’t a great setup), and also the case itself is just. irksome. ted tonate is just fundamentally irritating to look at

FINALE CASES

S-tier: Bridge to the Turnabout (3-5), Turnabout Goodbyes (1-4).  No explanation needed.  God they fuck so hard

A-tier: The Cosmic Turnabout + Turnabout for Tomorrow (5-4 + 5-5), Turnabout Succession (4-4).

The former two cases are what makes AA5 worth it, and they make for a tremendously fun ride.  It fumbles the execution in some notable ways (Apollo’s sudden j’accuse moment feels a little forced/awkward/inadequately foreshadowed, and damn it sure would’ve been nice to know Clay Terran at all before he died, and also The Phantom’s final meltdown could’ve used a bit more emotional heft)... but okay let’s be real, I’m here for Simon Blackquill, and this case gives me so much of him so who gives a shit.  (And Aura!  Condescending obnoxious engineering queen!  I love her!)  

As for Turnabout Succession... while I earnestly wish the game had explored more of Klavier’s feelings about this whole setup, and some more emotional beats for Apollo, the case still makes for such a satisfyingly twisty and fun investigation overall (the poison stamp! what a ridiculous murder method! I love it!) that it’s a more-than-worthy finale.

B-tier: Turnabout Revolution (6-5), Farewell, My Turnabout (2-4).

The former does some cool stuff—I particularly like the opening half, where Apollo’s being real snippy and coping with Frankly Bizarre Dad Feelings, and giving Apollo a chance to finally throw down against Phoenix is a blast.  The latter half of the case starts feeling a little... ridiculous? cramped? idk? like, they didn’t do nearly enough foreshadowing about Nahyuta’s whole deal for me to care about his drama, this justice system is so obviously silly and the manner in which the revolution is playing out strains my already-suspended-sky-high disbelief... fun, and flashy, but more noise than signal in the last part, I guess.

As for Farewell, My Turnabout: of course I love Edgeworth rolling back into court goin’ through SOME kind of bizarre emotional arc of Hey I’m Totally Healed Now and obnoxiously preaching about Truth TM.  And it’s cool that the game set up a case where you want to lose.  But the net result is a bit strange tonally—it’s trying set up some kind of message about It’s Not Just About Winning, It’s About Pursuing The Truth, but it feels really muddled when that’s combined with Okay But Maya’s Literally Being Held Hostage Like Right Now, Surely A Reasonable Justice System Has A Process For Dealing With This Obviously Complicated Situation, Right?

but also Franziska takes a fucking bullet (how did I forget about that) and then gets to roll in like Ms. Save The Day so, really, lots of good shit here

FILLER CASES

S-tier: Reunion, and Turnabout (2-2), Turnabout Beginnings (3-4).  Look, the first one gives me all the Fey family drama a girl could ask for, and the latter gives me young Edgeworth being a total shit in an obnoxiously shimmery outfit.  The whole enchilada is here

A+ tier: The Magical Turnabout (6-2).  DELIGHTFUL!  MAGICIAN!  SHENANIGANS!  Like you get to guess the trick behind a magic act as part of the case, how fucking fun is that, and also the Apollo & Athena duo’s chemistry is perfect, the villain is a FANTASTIC bastard, and even the bit characters you meet during the investigation are total delights... Probably the best “standalone” case in the series, in that it doesn’t rely on any emotional connections to previous cases (unlike 2-2 and 3-4) to still totally and completely rule.

A tier: Turnabout Samurai (1-3), Turnabout Reclaimed (5-DLC).

For Turnabout Samurai, I remembered before this replay how delightful the TV SHOW STUDIO investigation and actor-fandom stuff was; I had TOTALLY forgotten Vasquez calling in her mob connections to try and wreck you.  What a fantastic villain; what a fun case.

Turnabout Reclaimed is just good solid goofy nonsense.  Probably receives a boost for me in particular because, yeah, Simon Blackquill.  But then again who isn’t giving cases a boost on that account; they are MISSING OUT

B tier: The Stolen Turnabout (3-2).  Ron and Desirée are so great sighs into hands

C tier: Listing roughly in order of preference: Turnabout Academy (5-3), Turnabout Serenade (4-3), Turnabout Sisters (1-2), Recipe for a Turnabout (3-3), Rite of the Turnabout (6-3), Rise from the Ashes (1-5).

Four of these (5-3, 4-3, 1-2, 3-3) are perfectly solid cases; I just don’t love them quite as much as “thievery hijinks” or “Hollywood hijinks” or other such particularly delightful flavors.  Everyone has a favorite flavor of Jolly Rancher and all that.

Rite of the Turnabout is interesting and connected with the larger themes of the game in a cool way, and makes good use of the divination mechanic.  However, the last bit gets twisty enough to actually be kind of confusing, and said larger themes of the game are... kinda hard for me to take seriously... which, yeah, leads to it feeling a little stilted when it really should be singing.

Rise from the Ashes landed awkwardly for me.  I know it was added well after the first game’s release, and it does a good job of continuing some of the cool stuff from that game—it’s neat, in isolation, to see Phoenix and Edgeworth working together (while still sniping at each other!), and some of the DS-specific mechanics are neat.  However, I just didn’t feel like I learned quite enough about Ema and Lana to care about them like I should, and retconning “(almost certainly true) rumors that Edgeworth was involved in Shady Shit TM” into “actually Edgeworth was totally ignorant of Shady Shit TM, like at worst his crime was willful ignorance / incuriosity, he was just been manipulated by the Police Chief”... makes Edgeworth less interesting to me!  Like, it’s cool to see Edgeworth caught off-guard and under pressure, but I wish the circumstances had been different?  Also Gant’s theme song is annoying as shit, which is petty but hey this is my blog post so

D tier: Turnabout Storyteller (6-4), Turnabout Corner (4-2), Turnabout Big Top (2-3), The Monstrous Turnabout (5-2).

Turnabout Storyteller has some fun gags with My Dude Simon and also Taka, but was heavily marred by Everyone Talking Down To Athena The Entire Fucking Case Oh My God Can You All Just Shut Up.

Turnabout Corner has... lots of fun elements but... look the fucking stolen-panties setup just grates ok

I don’t think I hate Turnabout Big Top the way most people seem to, but I did find the final murder setup more annoying that I remembered this playthrough—bro you were really sure the dude was going to conveniently stand right there and the heavy statue was definitely going to strike a killing blow and not just give the guy a concussion?  ok lol

The Monstrous Turnabout suffers mostly from poor puzzle/investigation design, being too hand-hold-y, and also having a core gimmick/setting that just wasn’t really my thing.  Alas!

[this-is-quite-homoerotic]

did you say John/Ianto 👀👀 because same

I did indeed, Anon! Truth is, I spend at least half my time thinking about John/Ianto because I'm predictable trash 😩💅

I’m taking the opportunity to answer @grinchwrapsupreme too since I feel it’s on the same wavelength:

Well... I have several John/Ianto AU ideas that I think about on the regular, including but not limited to:

the one based on that one Buffy episode where dark!Ianto from a parallel universe is dropped in the canon universe post-season 2 and makes everyone think Ianto's affected by some weird alien thing because he’s acting so weird (until they realise it’s a whole other Ianto. Jack probably makes a threesome joke). Of course, canon!Jack and canon!Gwen are too straight-laced and vanilla for dark!Ianto so he decides to see if he can find John, because John is always a good time, and he’s always down for a bender ;) Long story short, they go on a bender. John is very confused at first, but dark!Ianto is such an unexpected delight, he soon decides to go with it. (I currently have 4 variations of this AU in my head because it turns out it could be a lot of fun to drop other dark!team characters as well and have them wreak havoc; all of the variations include John/Ianto, and all of them include polyamory, at least in spirit if not in execution)

the one where 21-year-old!Ianto who's working in T1 meets time agents Javic (just 'Javic', like 'Cher' or 'Prince') and John Hart (pseudonym) and becomes entangled with their case (and them ;) ) so he has a whirlwind romance with both of them for the few weeks it takes them to do whatever it was they were tasked with before they disappear again. He knew it couldn’t last, of course, but Ianto’s still disappointed; it’s still hard to let go. Imagine Ianto's surprise when he later runs into the leader of Torchwood Three when he shows up to argue with Yvonne over [random excuse]! Except... Javic doesn't seem to remember him at all, and John is nowhere to be found... 👀

the one where Ianto is a vampire and Jack is a succubus and John is sometimes invited into their relationship because why not

the really long elaborate one that started as a CoE fix-it AU but also was me trying to force Ianto and John into a situation where they had to work together and learn to trust each other without Jack being there and oops they end up falling in love and also being badasses and going on space adventures but they’re also both still in love with Jack so as soon as they can get back to him this leads to John/Jack/Ianto ot3

the one where Ianto wants more from Jack than Jack’s willing or capable of giving him, so Ianto leaves, only Torchwood isn’t the kind of job you can just quit, and retcon doesn’t exactly sound appealing to him, and also he’s very, very angry about Jack’s emotional unavailability and he’s depressed and feeling self-destructive, so what he does is he escapes into space. And who other than John motherfucking Hart does he run into in a nondescript space bar? 👀 (John knows a thing or two about running, and also about self-destructive behaviours and unhealthy coping mechanisms. John has also been lowkey wanting a piece of Eye Candy since he put a gun to his face and the man bared his teeth at him in response. Now it looks like he might get the chance.)

the sequel to You Got Me On Edge (Any Minute I Might Jump) (also a John/Jack/Ianto one). This one is pure fluff.

the proper Buffy AU I keep thinking about despite my best efforts, I blame James Marsters for being so good at making himself look soft and vulnerable even when he’s playing a character who is Such a Fucking Asshole™

I’m sure I’m forgetting some, but I like the general idea of John joining the team and slowly gaining everyone’s trust (and coming to love all of them while becoming more trustworthy while also still being a Bastard ❤) so take that one as a given. It goes without saying that Ianto and John fall in love and have a nice happy triad situation with Jack in this scenario. Sometimes, John dates other people too. Sometimes it’s a closed triad. Always, they’re very happy. A classic I often use as the backdrop for other ideas.

[lizacstuff]

Sen Çal Kapımı ep 48 asks

THE EPISODE WHERE THEY FINALLY GOT MARRIED!!!!!!!

SERKAN AND EDA ARE MARRIED!!

FINALLY!

YES!!!!!!!!!

Okay, now that I got that out of my system, asks under the read more.

andhewonherheart asked: @andhewonherheart I love that Bolat is Aydan’s last name, not Alptekin’s. I know it’s a little of a retcon, but this way we don’t need to worry about Serkan and his family carrying that man’s name. And Aydan would be a woman that strongarms her husband into taking her last name.

I LOVED THIS!  I sat up straight when Kemal made the comment about Alptekin taking her name and cheered. Seriously. What a great turn of events. Serkan is so attached to his name, it’s nice that he didn’t have to have an identity crisis over that on top of everything else. And now it’s not weird for Eda and Kiraz to take his name after finding out Kemal is actually his father, which I wanted for them. I wanted them all to be tied together with a name, to have that feeling of belonging. Plus, as you say, it’s nice they don’t have the name of that man. 

I will say one thing, though... is it really a retcon?  Did they ever say Bolat was Alptekin’s given last name? I don’t think they did (but who knows with the iffy translations we all rely on). I do remember Aydan bragging on the lineage of the Bolats in a very early episode (maybe 2?) and at the time I thought it was odd that she was so proud of the lineage when she just married into it, especially because if memory serves she was sort of heckling Eda, who was marrying a Bolat.  Perhaps this was always intended, and we only feel like it’s a retcon because we’re programmed by a patriarchal society to assume a woman always take a man’s last name?

Anonymous asked: I don’t really like the idea of Serkan giving up Art Life. I understand the symbolism of him giving up his work for his family, but I would’ve preferred that he finds a balance, like he did with bringing Kiraz to work. I feel like that would’ve been a more rounded way of approaching his character, instead of swinging him in the other direction, now instead of having only work, he only has his family. When he could have both.

He will have both. Eventually. He’ll figure it out and get back to where he was. He is Serkan Bolat after all. You don’t expect him to sit idle for any length of time, do you?

As much as part of me was just torn up at him selling his stake in the company, I thought it was really beautiful.  Sure, balance is good, but this is a man who has ripped out Eda’s heart twice by telling her that work is more important than she is to him. This is a man who left ON HIS WEDDING DAY, who put work first ON HIS WEDDING DAY, who got on a plane ON HIS WEDDING DAY because he tried to balance (do both, go to Italy and get married in one day) and it ended up putting them both through hell and almost ruining both of their lives.

Picture how you would feel if the person you were marrying decided to fly to another country on your wedding day? 

So I disagree with you. I’m more than fine with Serkan Bolat unequivocally putting Eda first over his career and company. After everything they’ve been though, and her insecurities in that area, it was incredibly important and now she will never, ever doubt where his heart lies. It’s with her. She (and their family) is his top priority.

Besides, the show started with Serkan having destroyed Eda’s dream of studying to become a landscape architect in Italy, it’s quite poetic that he gave up something substantial so that she could realize a dream of working as a landscape architect on her dream project in Italy.

I’m pretty sure she’ll be more than happy to help rebuild their company. Together. 

Anonymous asked: i know you said in your previous ask round-up that as far as the actual proposal goes, nothing would top that speech in 27.. i was wondering how you felt about his speech this episode. sure, it wasn't actually the proposal, more like a "reception" toast, but for me i think it was my favorite speech, or at least top 3, serkan has said to/about eda.. just pure love about their journey together and a huge full circle moment with that video from the pilot episode.

YEEEEEESSSSSS. I so agree with this, and actually thought exactly this while watching.  It was a marvelous speech and while, as you say, it was presented as more of a toast, it was really more of a wedding vow.  

I loved it. And I’ve rewatched it multiple times and I plan to watch it many times more. As always Kerem and Hande were excellent in the scene. Eda and Serkan were in front of their friends and family, but they were so focused in on one another they might as well have been alone. The emotion was palpable. 

She is love. Dang, Serkan!  He’s mentioned love at first sight a couple of times, it was nice that in this moment he gave another nod to that.

Loved the call back to the video from the first episode, it worked really well, especially to remind us of how it all started and how she felt like he destroyed her dream. That segued into him mentioned them destroying each other’s dreams. As I said above, quite poetic, especially since he then put his money where his mouth was by the end of the episode and destroyed his dream to preserve hers. 

Well done, show. 

Anonymous asked: i have loved the tone of this season so much. none of the drama we have is super heavy, outside of the kiraz reveal which was given the angst and importance it should have bc of how it important it was. otherwise, we've had happy (now married!) edser coming back together and now facing trouble and issues as a couple! this was basically all i wanted for them since 28!

Yes, me too. I really enjoy the tone this season. As you say, it’s not super heavy, the melodrama is at a minimum, most things are light and fluffy and even heavy issues are played with a light hand. 

For me, I’ve really enjoyed this season and I’m super glad we got it.  I think COVID did us one favor by shutting down production when it did and forcing them to reevaluate what they were doing.  If they hadn’t I’m guessing the show would have continued in a very messy and directionless manner, with lots of melodrama and storylines that would have been traumatic to watch. 

Season 2 has direction and purpose and a plan and once we got past the horrified shock of the time jump and the secret daughter (which I grant you was no small feat) it’s pretty much been trauma free. 

Anonymous asked: After watching the episode, I'm lowkey disappointed. we did get Pretty Woman SCK-style. I was promised Serkan as a gigilo and Eda encouraging it!!!!! LOL, jokes aside, I'll never forget the outrage over that fragman over "harassment" or "prostitution" of all things when the actual dinner scene lasted 3 minutes, Eda was being at the hotel the whole time, and the scene where people thought she was encouraging him was about her project. Almost 50 eps and you would ppl would learn how fragmans work.

The fragman was insanely misleading, but lots of them are, so you would think they would have figured it out by now, but nope! A large swath of people really embarrassed themselves with their complete over reaction to something that turned out to be nothing like they thought. 

Thankfully Serkan was entirely in the dark about how dire the situation was and why Eda was pushing him to make nice with Deniz, and only humored Deniz very unwillingly and then completely cut ties with her.  I think the best part was the least shocking twist ever... that the Serkan staying in her room line was an actual joke on the show. Come on, kids, it was pretty obvious to anyone with a brain that Serkan would never actually consider staying with her, and certainly not just days after he got married. Preposterous!   

Having said that, I do agree with people who think that Deniz being obsessed with him to that degree is dumb. There is a thread of misogyny and internalized misogyny (depending on which writers) running through the writing of these female guest characters who come in and absolutely shed all dignity, sanity and common sense when it comes to Serkan. Selin, Balca, the actress and Deniz.  Good grief. However, I just don’t care enough to get pissy. If that’s what they’ve come up with to fuel the jealousy trope that apparently is a must for Turkish dizis without having Serkan ever have eyes for anyone but Eda, then so be it.  

The formula is more than obvious by now, so I’m not sure why some folks made asses of themselves jumping to other conclusions. 

[sepublic]

Y’all ever read an angst fic without a happy ending that just UTTERLY wrecks you. And even if you know what happened in the fic would never happen in canon, that the characters would never do that, that it isn’t canon by the end of the day and just someone else’s interpretation- You just can’t rest?

Because even if you look at other fan content that has the characters be happy or reconciling, deep in your heart you know that this version of the characters, from that fic you read, will never get that happiness? And even if they did, that doesn’t change nor retcon the tragedy of what happened, it still happened and will forever mar their memories, and it’s just so unfair-

And then because you’re an utter wuss, your heart hurts. You feel a genuine pressure there from the ache and emotional pain that makes the chest feel heavy, that’s how powerful this fic was, especially if you really resonate with the characters hurt! Sometimes you gotta take a deep breath, just to relieve the physical hurt, and all the while you curse yourself because why are you so goddamn sensitive, they’re just fictional!

Just move on but you can’t, the worry and lack of closure is getting to you even when you should be working on something else, and then suddenly it’s hard to focus! Then you can’t even enjoy other happy content, especially if it included those hurt faves, because you keep thinking back to THAT fic and how that happened and how it ended there, and how it will always be left off at that point forever.

Seeing your faves, even in a happy context, just reminds you of that unresolved angst and it leaves an empty hole in your heart. It’s this bitter feeling and taste in your mouth and a part of you wishes you never read that, especially if the angst came as a gut-punch and back-stab to genuine emotional vulnerability and happiness, because there’s just that feeling of frustrated betrayal! And you WANT just the happy bits but not the sad bits, and it reminds you sometimes of things in your life that went so right until this one thing at the very end ruined it all. And now that happiness is forever tainted by the bitter potential that was torn away- And you can never take that back, can’t take back what happened, not in the story nor in real life. And it’s just utter despair when you realize that because what’s even the point of trying then?

Just... man. People really write this stuff for free, stuff that makes me FEEL, huh? And then they tear out my heart and stomp on it and I’m impressed but also lowkey salty. And obviously this all speaks to the larger wonder of the human condition and experience, but just focusing on the moment wow this really sucks. The characters really deserved better and seeing them happy is like a reminder that this is a lie of what they won’t ever have in that fic, and JEEZ why are you such a drama queen over a piece of fiction?!

And by the end of the day, there’s that bitter resignation that it might just take time. Time for you to heal and move on. But you’ll be damned if you won’t be kicking and screaming the whole way because that stuff made you FEEL things, and if you’re going to tease me with happiness, follow through on it! You’re lowkey salty and in some ways wish you never read that. But who knows? Life is weird. There IS a catharsis to sadness for many, but for some you also really need relief afterwards, especially if you really care for and resonate with these characters, that angst for them actually hits close to home!

So then you’re just bitterly left considering what could’ve been. Oh, if the author had cut things off at that happy point! Just kept it fluffy! But of course you’re not entitled to their writing decisions and the fact that it makes you feel this way is a testament to how good it is. And sometimes you’re just left wishing it wasn’t that good. Alas, that’s just how it is sometimes- Opening yourself to joy means opening yourself up to despair. And writers are entitled to make what they want, you kind of accepted the warnings. Plus as someone who’s written angst without a happy ending yourself, you’re not one to talk- There’s this dim realization of “So that’s what it feels like.”

You have empathy for your readers now and does this mean you will be more merciful? Who can tell. Sometimes if something hurts you as a writer that YOU made, you kind of revel in sharing that with others so their reactions can validate your feelings, and so they can get that unusual catharsis too. There’s that satisfaction that you can inspire emotion. Maybe we can BOTH share the pain and move past it together, of what happened in this story- Especially if you don’t intend to expand on it. Like damn that’s cruel exposing others to that misery of your own making, but that’s also media and content and catharsis y’all.

And sometimes it’s worse when it’s not a fanfic but a fully official piece of media. Sometimes that can be WORSE because it IS fully canon, even if there’s usually a hopeful guarantee that there has to be a resolution. But not always, depending on the type of media at hand. And as I said, that’s just part of the risk, and really the thrill, of emotionally opening up and engaging with media, with putting yourself and your heart there, seeing yourself, and having empathy that feels like pain to yourself when those characters suffer. Empathy sure is a bitch, but it’s a begrudgingly worthwhile one that you’d never give up. And that’s just for FICTION, too- Stuff that isn’t even real, characters not even actual people with real emotions!

Jeez- You’re an utter mess. And lemme tell you it’s even worse when that fic leaves off right in the middle of that despair, not even giving either you nor the characters that coping period to come to terms with what happened. Just leaving them stunned in that eternal hurt, right smack dab in the middle of where it hurts most. Not even the luxury of getting to step back and look back, no you and the characters, they never left that moment, and that’s what I mean when it sucks about that lack of closure. This is their ending and that’s all there is, any speculation lends to the worst of your imagination.

So it’s like you’re both trapped in that moment. No time afterwards to recover. No time afterwards to reflect, even if it still ends in despair, because there’s not even that solace of it ending, of you getting away physically- You’re still IN that moment forever, and it’s lowkey suffocating and feels like it’s surrounding you 24/7. You can never escape, you won’t, it’s still there and always will be- You’ll always be there. You’re trapped and you need an escape, anything, but it’s not there. And even if you write your own escape and happy resolution or alternate ending in denial, that’s just your imagination and wishful thinking, not the reality of what happened in that story. So not even your or others’ fanfic can help, and dammit this really sucks huh?

You can’t move on because you never got to see the characters do the same, after all- And unfortunately, you’re seeing too much of yourself in them. It’s all fun and games torturing the reader until you, the writer, are one of them! And in some ways the writer IS the reader too, of their own work, they have the control so that just makes it all the more funny that the writer still subjects themselves to that anyway, stubbornly. With determined, sadomasochistic resolve. You’re gonna make your own bed and lie in it, yet you complain how the bed was made and that you’re lying in it in the first place, when no one is making you!

Why are you like this, why do you keep coming back to this? But again, such is catharsis and that release of emotion that puts it into words and something that feels real and validating, when otherwise you’re just dead inside and can’t explain nor justify it. Sometimes it’s easy to be cruel when you’re detached, other times you deliberately hurt yourself when writing or reading- Because somehow there’s a relief in THAT to your emotions, that you get to feel them fully now instead of just dully grasping at them numbly but not really...

...But damn if you don’t wish it could’ve gotten the happy ending. If you’re writing, there’s always that relief that you’re in control, that you chose this, that you can always reverse it if you wanted. But if you’re a reader or viewer you’re at the helpless whims of someone else, vulnerable and out there. As the writer you saw it coming, but as the audience you’re just as blindsided and betrayed as the characters. There is no hope of agency or change or control, no realization of what’s to come, and THAT. Sucks.

But hey- At least you’re writing about this. At least you’re putting this out there into tangible words, because that makes it feel real. Your feelings are real and valid. And it helps to cope and process and realize how this made you felt and sometimes that’s worse, but also that understand grants some lose agency and control, because you can now at least comprehend it. And maybe then, can you come to terms with it. Accept, and finally... move on. Hopefully to happier things. And if you see yourself in those characters, then it gives hope that they can move on too, in this hypothetical fic, in this universe of theirs where something inevitably had to have happened afterwards.

...Unless they died. But uh, at least YOU can move past that I guess. And that shows that even amidst that despair, others can feel joy afterwards, and damn it if it wasn’t all worth it anyway for those characters, too! You can look back and decide it was worthwhile, so can they in there hypothetical sense, so they don’t regret living even if their ‘death’ wasn’t exactly ideal. That somebody, out there, understands, that it wasn’t all for naught- That the audience can benefit at least from the joy and pain, that the character is at least understood before death, and that provides a relief and closure of its own, that the story is not unsung and unheard nor forgotten, far from it. They are in a sense immortalized by the media and thus protected and preserved, and that can help make up for it- Not just another nameless and senseless tragedy but one that can be learned from and felt for catharsis!

...I dunno, I’ve just been really waxing and poetic lately over angst without a happy ending. I guess talking about that helps to prove my earlier point about coping, but also reassuring myself that it’s not the end of the world. And sharing those feelings out there means others who feel the same can arrive. They can also feel solace and reassurance and validation from this perhaps, and provide it as well. And we realize that in the end, we’re not alone and it’s okay to feel- It gets better. Maybe not that moment, but life as a whole, and even if life doesn’t improve, at least you got that and the release in the first place.

And that’s that relief that because it’s all fiction, it gives you a place to be ultimately safe as you explore these ideas and feelings, VS real life. Your feelings are still real probably, but at least the suffering of the characters themselves isn’t, and that is in many ways a relief, because even if there IS something to be learned from this- There are better and infinitely less painful ways to do so! And dammit, the tragedy can be salvaged to a degree, but the pain was not at ALL worth what we got out of this! This is more minimizing damage by trying to control it than an actual trade really. Suffering CAN be learned from, but let’s be a real, it is it not at all worth it, nor justifies its cause by the end of the day.

Even if the characters’ suffering and by consequence joy isn’t real- Even if they themselves do not exist, what you see in them, what’s reflected from yourself in them, the feelings they inspire... THAT is real and if you can see and feel yourselves in that, in some ways they’re real too, because aren’t you as well? And again, it’s like you’re exploring yourself, but ultimately there’s that safe reprieve that comes from fiction.

...But dammit you really do wish that author had just stuck to the happy bits and not bothered with the angst, we could’ve had it all! And Y’know what, those feelings and gripes are valid, even if the author’s choices are as well. Reader and writer are both valid, just don’t put them in the same room together, because there is SALT there!

[clumsyclifford]

hi my love i’m hope not too late but i would like you to tell me about my loves jewish cake, anything you want to but specifically baker calum 🥰 thank you i love you

of course you aren’t too late!!! ESPECIALLY to talk about jewish cake oh my goodness meg i shall die for you i love you. alright let’s see what i can dig up

ha’ahava hazot shelanu + it’s so simple

a cut, per usual

so let’s start WITH:

ha’ahava hazot shelanu

jewish cake was a labor of love for myself. little known fact about me is that i am in fact jewish! :) and around christmas time i always get a little prickly about the surplus of christmas spirit and in this case the amount of fic for it. and i’d sort of had this hesitant idea to write a jewish fic in the back of my mind for a long time, but it felt like a really big divergence from the Cast of Characters that was for some reason a lot more dramatic than any other circumstances into which i could place them, so i’d basically been hesitating for several months. in november we had a brief conversation about it in the club which looked like this

but the idea still made me a little nervous and so i kind of talked myself out of writing it, as always. and THEN, middle of december, iba sent me this 1d fic out of nowhere with this accompanying message:

and i kinda lowkey almost cried!! it was such a jewish fic. i read the word kvetch and i almost lost it. the fic was just so unabashedly jewish. and i was like...well. that’s what ive been wanting to do. so now i have no reason not to do it.

in the ao3 notes i talked a little bit about my internal debate over How Jewish To Go with the fic because on the one hand i really do understand that it can feel alienating going into a fic with zero understanding of the culture but on the other hand since it was MY fic i wanted to make it jewish the way i’m jewish. which is like...............very. i don’t think i ended up striking a balance so much as just deciding to say fuck it and write it the way i would want to read it, but i definitely think that was the right decision for me.

there was actually one more motivator for writing this fic, especially the WAY i wrote it, in eight chapters, and that motivator was that i wanted to break 400k on ao3 before the year ended. i just wanted to have an even number and 400k was a good goal. which i did achieve thanks to jewish cake fic being the 13.6k beast that she is! so that was also part of it

NOW! as for the PROCESS. i created the doc on december 22 and i originally kind of thought it was a little bitchy to write a hanukkah fic after hanukkah had already ended but was reminded that most christmas fic is neither written nor posted on actual christmas which reassured me well enough. i had already had the idea to divide it into eight chapters for the eight nights of hanukkah and i thought that would be a nice way to showcase different aspects of the holiday (seeing family, playing dreidel, opening presents etc) and also in certain cases (like the third chapter where they do some baking) some days that weren’t necessarily hanukkah-driven but just a nice natural consequence of being on break for hanukkah. i wanted it to feel like hanukkah feels to me!! normally i don’t like people seeing the way my outlines look but this one i don’t mind sharing so here’s what i had at the top of the doc for reference while i was writing. not everything in that first list got included but most of it did !!! 

i’m not really sure how this fic ended up being cake. i never used to default to cake but for some reason as i was diving into this one it just felt right. that’s all i can say about that. meg you have genuinely shifted my approach to fic i DO default to cake sometimes now and that’s on YOU. 

the very first thing i ever wrote down for this fic was this part that ended up going in the summary:

“Happy Hanukkah,” Calum says, smiling at Luke as their fingers intertwine.

Luke murmurs, “Chag sameach, ahovi,” and Calum’s face is aglow in the candlelight.

that was The Moment for me. i didn’t even write the rest of that scene until later but i had those two lines written down straight out the gate and i knew they were gonna close out the first scene because it just Felt Right. and i was right! very cool and fun for me

now the nice convenient thing about having this fic separated into eight discrete scenes/nights/chapters was that i didn’t have to write it in order, and i didn’t. i DID write the first night/chapter first, but then over the course of maybe a week, i wrote (deep breath get ready): the first half of chapter 2 (hemmings family) > the beginning of chapter 5 (the dreidel game) > most of the scene in chapter 7 > the beginning of chapter 3 (where they bake) > finished writing chapters 2 & 3 > started chapter 4 and finished chapter 5 > finished chapter 4 and wrote the rest of chapter 7 > all of chapter 6 > all of chapter 8 aka the proposal. i deliberately saved the proposal for last because i don’t think i could have written it exactly right without knowing the events that came before it but everything else was all over the place as you can see. 

a problem i ran into a lot, and i talked to my sounding board and fellow jew sam about this among many other things, was that i had a lot of trouble characterizing very obviously Not Jewish people in a way that made them Very Jewish. not even like, Jewish But You Can Ignore It. i wanted them to be front-and-center jewish like i am and that was hard for me to navigate because obviously my speech patterns and vocabulary as an american jew are extremely different from 5sos’s as australian goyim (non-jews) like i do use hebrew words in my day-to-day communication all the time and i somehow had to keep their mannerisms but also insert mine BUT not insert so many of mine that the fic became incomprehensible and it was just. a Challenge. here’s some insight into THAT crisis

and then again writing the other characters in other chapters

i sent sam the doc when i was mostly done writing it, mainly just to be reminded that at least one person was going to appreciate this fic, which worked out nicely because she very very much did. genuinely i cannot stress enough how insecure i was to write and share this fic. like i’m gonna be really straight up with you meg, i think part of the reason i had calum and luke baking sufganiyot was because to me that felt like a sort of bribe? i basically wrote what felt to me like the least appealing fic ever and then my mission from there was to add stuff in that would convince people to give it a shot anyway. i was trying to make it worth everyone’s while. the baking was my trade-off, i was like “well yeah it’s a jewish fic but maybe she’ll be happy enough that it’s cake and they’re baking that she’ll forgive it for being a jewish fic” yes i realize how kind of hilariously tragic this sounds but !!! you never get jewish fics!!! and you especially don’t get them in fanfiction for obviously non-jewish bands!!! anyway. we’re not gonna get into this whole thing but like. even though objectively i knew that i had been told again and again people would appreciate the fic i still had doubts and knowing something and feeling secure in it are very different things.

also, i didn’t remember this, but apparently i had a lot of problems with writing the proposal! here’s a sneak peek into that mental breakdown

don’t actually think the fic specifies (making life easier for myself) but they have already had dinner in that scene. so now you know. 

i could choose to not get this elbows-deep in the details of Crises I Had While Writing This Fic but instead i am choosing to go all out. here’s another thing i had trouble with:

(i did end up using transliteration obviously but i DO think actual hebrew would have been a cool flex)

and as for the title, ha’ahava hazot shelanu is the name of an ivri lider song that i love, and it translates to “this love of ours” and i realize titling the fic in hebrew was a Choice but i did talk to sam about this as well and that went roughly like this

by the way here is the song, i absolutely love it and i cannot recommend it enough. also i’m not sure how glaringly obvious this is but the chapter titles on ao3 are just hebrew numbers. like the first chapter is echad which literally means one. and so on. are they the correct genders? i don’t know ! fuck gendered language.

one more thing and then ill move on but an unfortunate natural consequence of writing a hanukkah fic (at least the way i wrote this one) is that it necessitates presents. so i had to come up with presents for these dumb boys to give each other. and to be completely honest with you i don’t remember how i did!!! the ones calum got for luke were trickier because they were actual things. for some reason this luke was always a version of luke that just kinda like, wore makeup, so that was just a question of figuring out an eyeshadow palette that would be Nice but not obscenely schmancy (i did ask the club for help since i know nothing about makeup but as usual i ignored their replies). but that by itself didn’t feel like enough of a gift, and so i tried to think of something that would be more than just the gift of an object. like, something that would maybe enable luke to spend more time on something he loves. piano music made sense to me because it wasn’t just a thing by itself it was a thing that encouraged luke to play piano and even to improve at it and to learn songs that he could be excited about. so! that was that

the trip to israel gift was a little bit of a retcon situation i really liked the idea that luke had been planning to give that “gift” to calum for a hot sec that he’d have had it ready, but i’d already written the scene where he and mali talk about israel, so i went back to it and edited it a little to hint at the idea (luke plays it off very casually because he is a clever boy) but i thought there was something very romantic in the idea of the israel trip, of luke planning a future with calum and a trip to a place that means so much to him (to me yes maybe luke and i are the same blah blah) and getting to drag calum around to falafel places and teach him words in hebrew and it just seemed like the appropriate trip for these two cute jewish boys to plan so i rolled with it.

okay moving on slightly!! to baker calum <3 baker calum was more of a cameo in the hanukkah fic, in the chapter i wrote with you in mind, but i can talk about it’s so simple here as well because i fucking adore that fic.

it’s so simple

so the inspiration behind the fic came from the “kitchens are for lovers” rhetoric and the realization that that would be the perfect...sort of thesis to build on for a fic for you in specific, because you are, in my mind, a very kitchen-based person, given your baking habit. it actually just worked out pretty nicely for me honestly because i’ve been wanting to write a big Kitchen Romance type fic for a while and you just gave me the perfect opportunity. here’s what i had at the top of the doc for the fic for you

and then once i sort of landed on the idea for the fic, it just made a lot of sense to make it jewish cake because, well, im gonna be real w you, because i identify very strongly with jewish cake and the kitchen-romance aspect felt like a very bella thing in the same way that jewish cake felt like a bella thing. and so i wanted to be able to romanticize these kitchens to share the way that i, bella, feel about them, and that was easy to do when the characters were so similar to me. not to mention this cake already existed in my head as a very settled, domestic duo, and they had their own home and had already had a kitchen-romance scene in the hanukkah fic and the whole thing just fell together perfectly. i had this sentence in my head and it was: “Shabbat in Luke and Calum’s kitchen looks something like this.” the kind of thing you would read in a fic summary right? and especially having it take place on shabbat felt like an extra layer of domestic easy romance to me so that was kind of my guide

here was my "outline” for this:

Romance :)))

obviously calum was going to be the one doing most of the cooking/baking because he had been established as the Kitchen Boy between the two of them and maybe i realized in the course of writing it that while i was luke, you were very much calum. so the goal was then basically to romanticize (1) the kitchen and (2) luke as much as humanly possible for you (see: message sent to helen and ainslee)

unfortunately i was unable to do baker calum justice as much as i would have liked because i could not have him baking anything complex because i can’t bake anything complex and if i had tried to describe him baking something complex and then described it wrong i would have died of shame so that is why he is only baking brownies BUT they have chocolate chips which hopefully makes up for it. also i just stumbled across this which i think pretty well represents the crisis i had regarding baker calum

:)))

re: the soundtrack (so to speak), i wanted to include some songs that i associate with you meg but you see the situation is that some of those songs are 5sos/mali/atl songs and so i couldn’t include those, for obvious reasons, which did narrow down my choices somewhat. fortunately i think the mcfly worked pretty nicely i mean yeah it’s a little obvious that i was forcing mcfly into the story but they deserved to be there. i think i’ve mentioned this but i genuinely have a memory of listening to star girl on a loop in my kitchen at home and in my head the hood-hemmings kitchen looks like my kitchen because i have zero imagination so it felt to me like these songs just belonged in kitchens. and that they’d be inherently romantic. woah i think my brain is short-circuiting i’m not sure i’m making sense anymore. point being i hoped that you would appreciate it nonetheless.

a note about the short introduction, because it’s very unlike anything i’ve put in any other fic to my knowledge. i kind of wanted it to feel like the prologue to a fairytale, almost. i wanted it to feel like the beginning of a movie, when the camera is slowly, slowly zooming in from a Big Picture down to one house on one street and then through the window into the kitchen while the voiceover is very serenely describing the scene. i wanted it to feel like we were in the kitchen before even calum was and that we were standing against the fourth wall watching the fic unfold. and also, i wanted to make the fic romantic as fuck, from the get-go. there was to be no confusion: this fic was going to romanticize the living daylights out of the hood-hemmings kitchen.

(also you may have noticed that despite having “london” in the list of Meg Things at the top of the doc, the fic never actually specifies that they’re in london. that’s because this fic was really an exercise in “how much can i hint that they’re in london without outright saying it so i don’t establish a canon that i may later regret” which went as far as me asking helen what her kitchen floors and counters are made of. like. if you want it to be in london then hell yeah it’s in london but i didn’t wanna lock myself into that decision just in case so i never actually said it but i hope it kinda felt london-y anyway lmao)

so...............i THINK that’s all i have to say. “all” as if i havent just written an entire dissertation but at least it’s done now. i sure did say a lot! that was a lot!!! but also a very very fun and interesting dive into the ~process~ of writing these jewish cake fics. also, for what it’s worth, the way hanukkah fic was received basically calmed all my fears about writing jewish fic, which was a relief for me. so thank you for loving it, i don’t think you know how much that means to me!!!! i love YOU so very much

[fantasyinvader]

Kamen Rider Saber: Finale and Series Review

Okay, before I start disemboweling this series I want to give the finale two points of props.

It was nice to see the main trio fight the big bad together rather than it just being the lead Rider.

The ending really feels nostalgic for me. It's like one of those old games or anime that tried to do something like Evangelion, mostly Star Ocean 3 comes to mind.

I was going to add another point: how the ending didn't have to rely on a cosmic retcon to turn things into a happy ending like Build or Zi-o did, leaving those who died dead and having some level of maturity. I was going to give the show that point, even if it felt like it was leading into Touma essentially becoming God, but then the show did it and...I'm going to be honest here, I was saying fuck you at the screen. Multiple times, kinda like when Doctor Who's 50th anniversary where it turns out Gallifrey wasn't destroyed, the Doctor sealed it away and just couldn't remember it. Like, that is the level of bullshit I was calling out, and with Doctor Who I only said it as an “oh fuck you” rather than just “fuck you fuck you fuck you” until I noticed I was doing this and stopped myself.

Got it? Good. Now let's put Kamen Rider Saber on the examination table, rip it open, and see what went wrong with it.

Oh my god, where to begin with this series?

You ever see a show or movie that tries to do too much for it's runtime? Maybe a book that has some ultimately good ideas, but it never fleshed them out properly? That's my biggest feeling with Saber. Individual parts of the story, some arcs and characters are good on paper. Not to mention, Touma has two incredibly sexy upgrades (the Ryuki-inspired Draconic Knight and the berserker Primitive Dragon). But there is just so much in here that, given the proper focus could have carried the show if properly developed. It's a case of quantity over quality.

But the main problem comes to it's central McGufffin, the Omniscient Tome. This book is supposed to have all knowledge and later on all stories contained within it. It's what powers Wonderworld and the Wonder Ridebooks that are the main collectable trinket of the season. But when you stop and think about it, Saber is a world where there is no free will and the antagonists are all rebelling against this in their own way. Kento's dad (former Kamen Rider Calibur) went rogue in the backstory because he was given a vision of the future through his sword, and it led to the former Saber taking up the role of Calibur and going rogue in order to learn the truth. When the other riders are turned against Touma, the argument is over how he's destined to become more powerful, making Touma seem like he's seeking power and could be a future threat. When Kento returns from the dead, he's haunted by visions of the world ending in multiple variations, leading to him trying to seal the Sacred Blades in order to stop it. But then Master Logos is revealed to be buttfucking insane, wanting to rebel against his position in the world. Then it turns out the monster faction's leader, was a former poet who lost hope when he learned that all his creations were already in the Omniscient Tome, so he decided he would end the world his way rather than the predetermined ending. And even then, the world still ended the way it was always fated to end, even with Touma disappearing to nu-Wonderworld if only for a year.

The world wasn't saved, it was destroyed and then rebuilt because Mei wrote an online post that encouraged people to share their stories, which they did in oblivion even though these guys shouldn't have seen the post at all and instead just heard her voice.

Like, maybe the nu-World has free will. I'd buy that. But when applied to the 47 episodes I've spent the last year watching (alongside the Zenkaiger crossover episode), it felt pointless because it ended the way it was foretold in the Omniscient Tome. It didn't matter that Storious was defeated, fate was not averted. It's like, the complaints people have about the MCU post-Loki. It doesn't matter that Tony decided to sacrifice himself, because he didn't have free will. He was always going to sacrifice himself. Thanos was always going to snap away half the universe, and it would always be undone because choices didn't matter before Loki's ending.

And that's not even going into how they final arc reveals that Touma can somehow create stories not present in the Omniscient Tome. That he can somehow, because the personification of Wonderworld choose him as a child, that for some reason he's the only writer in history that can do this. His catchphrase is about how he'll be the one who'll decide how the story ends, but with the idea that everything was set into stone? It's laughable.

Like, my problem with Zero One's ending was the last scene. Aruto had learned a lot about the Humagears and was an advocate for them finding their own dreams as they became self-aware AI. So him trying to treat a new humagear as just an amnesiac Is  and try to help her “remember”? That felt like a betrayal of the character and what he stood for. But the post-series movie revealed that Is left a copy of herself in the Zero Two driver, and merged with the non-self aware nu-Is who the movie kept reminding us wasn't the Is we knew. Aruto even had a sobbing scene about what he was doing, lowkey acknowledging what he was doing but without overtly calling him out. It fixed Zero One for me after that last scene left me with a bad taste in my mouth that overshadowed an otherwise excellent show.

You can't fix Saber with a single movie, that's what I'm getting at here.

So, with that out of the way let's go into my thoughts on each character.

Touma: Is one of the blandest main riders in the franchise. His sense of style is probably one of the worst I've ever seen though. Like I know they like to try and give the main riders their own look rather than having them dress like normal people, like Aruto wearing a hoodie under his suit jacket alongside with his very bright shoes, but this wasn't a W or even something like Ghost (where honestly I really liked Takeru's robe-like shirts). What they eventually settled on with Touma was a stupid hat, really baggy pants, and shirts that look like they came out of a stern librarian's closest. You know, the type with her hair in a bun and their horned-framed glasses on a chain.

Rintaro:Is one of those cases where he's meant to be the secondary Rider of the series, but is overshadowed because the writer likes to use someone else more. The idea of him having to turn against the organization that raised him (like a child soldier) could have worked really well if the series had a more free will-direction. But alas.

Kento: Kento's the one character I found I could really like. His arc was more interesting during the first quarter, his return as Calibur, but then he returned to being Espada and, as much as I love that suit, he just became Touma's main cheerleader. Really, I felt like towards the end it was a waste of him, especially since he doesn't get any power ups like Rintaro did to solidify him as one of the main three. He definitely feels like a victim of rewrites or just the writer not knowing what he was doing.

Mei: The female lead. Honestly, I just found her annoying most of the time. A womanchild to match Touma's more manchild moments, with a potential romance with Rintaro thrown in to only be confirmed in a future movie. Really, she should have taken over as Espada after Kento disappeared early on (especially since she's one of the three in the Ending dance while Kento isn't).

Daishinji: I'd say best boy, but he became a background character pretty quick.

Ogami: An older Kamen Rider who is also a father to a young child? Cool, and could even have worked in contrast to Rintaro's raising as essentially a child soldier. But alas, it was not to be.

Ren: OMG. A somewhat psycho younger Rider, idolizing Kento, and his social Darwinist beliefs on strength leading to conflict as Touma gets more powerful, leading to him abandoning the team to train with an enemy monster? HOW DO YOU MAKE THAT NOT WORK! I swear, Ren should have been the secondary Rider of the series, with his changes in beliefs being used more effectively.

Yuri: One of the most competantly written characters in the entire show. One of the original swordsman who became his sword, returning after 2000 years and not only feeling the culture clash of then and now but even how the idea of what makes a hero has changed? Good boy. Also loved him using a shadow body early on during fights.

Sophia: Why are you even here?

Reika: Oh boy, the swordswoman who leads the rest to distrust Touma under the orders of Master Logos, and doesn't sway from this until he's proven to be batshit insane? And even then, reluctant to join the others? Could have been better, especially if her relationship with her brother didn't come across as incesty. Though, could we please return her to Magine in Zenkaiger? Reika hugging her was really cute, in a socially awkward type of way.

Ryoga: Reika's brother. With his powers being something out of Jojo, time manipulation powers which are a bit hard to explain. He starts them and to his opponents things seem like the fight is continuing as normal, but he really exists outside of that and then can attack from a blindspot? Could have been really good with if the series had gone Team Free Will is all I'm saying.

Master Logos: What I mentioned above, but his Rider suit is one I'm in lust with. Just laughs like a madman and you're wondering why Reika and Ryoga don't rebel against him earlier.

The Megid: Two are a waste who I never bothered to learn their names. Fall out of focus for a bit and only return to be beaten, with the sad fact that they were once human. Storious is the exception, but even then I felt he was a little too late to save the series.

Tassel: Bon Lecture! I still hate you you weirdo, even if your death scene made me feel a little sad. The fact that you treated the early parts of the show as a story you were reading? Have you seen my other complaints?

As for the message of what the show tried to say? I don't really mind it. It's encouraging people to love stories, even if they are copies (considering the controversy of Time Paradox Ghostwriter and Cheat Slayer within recent memory, I'm trying not to make jokes about Saber encouraging plagiarism). And I don't think that's a bad thing in itself. Hell, how many stories take stuff from older stories and just tweak elements to make them their own? I love the Elric saga, but that was based on old legends and meant to subvert the likes of Conan the Barbarian, and some other stories I've liked have borrowed elements from it as well. The idea that stories can be used to pass on our hopes, thoughts and dreams to others is pretty nice as well, rather than writing being a form of masturbation on the author's part.

But in the shadow of the Omniscient Tome and it's implications, I really feel the story should have taken another route.

A lot of Riders start of weak, having to introduce the plot as well as the main release of whatever trinket they want kids to gorge themselves on this year. But they usually start getting better towards the end of the first quarter, while maybe stalling a bit towards the end of the second/third. Saber was a series that I felt never really found it's legs. Too many bareboned plot threads on the go, dropping some for a while only to pick them up again after they've been forgotten about. This is not a good series, to be honest I think Zi-O and even Ghost were better, and really feel it would have been better handled in the hands of someone who could actually write. 

Not to mention, this gave me flashbacks of Power Rangers Megaforce over how much this series relied on fight scenes. Throw in greenscreen everywhere, lack of civilians...oh god, it is Kamen Rider Megaforce. And it felt like Saber was trying to have a story, unlike Megaforce, but it has the same “it’s a kid’s show, we don’t have to try that hard” energy.

[whitherliliesbloom]

✿ stories you want to write

Tagged by: @earthlystar, @fistsoflightning, @stars-bleed-hearts-shine​, @windup-dragoon​ THANK YOU SO MUCH!!

Tagging: idk, whoever wants to do this lmao. just say I tagged you!

Anyone who knows me knows I’m a bundle of unfulfilled ideas / headcanons. I have a lot of stories / AU ideas I want to write.. but either don’t have the time or energy to write them... Or you know, I’m just plain lazy.

I’m also kind of leaning more towards Genshin Impact now than FFXIV oops

1) More time travel AU

I KNOW!! I’m the only one who cares about this au okay but 

TIME TRAVEL STORIES ARE ALWAYS SOME OF MY FAVORITE STORIES??? ADDING TO THAT ANYTHING INVOLVING LIKE.. META COMMENTARY AND POSSIBLE 4TH WALL BREAKING??? STEINS;GATE??? MADOKA MAGICA??? CHARLOTTE??? UNDERTALE??? The ability to stop time and rewind time is just such a COOL ASS concept to me?? I won’t shut up about wanting time mage in ffxiv just so I can OFFICIALLY make her a canon overpowered time and space manipulator. Maybe then, time travel au won’t just be an au anymore.

On top of that I just really like Cronus. The idea of an Illya who is so damaged and broken she becomes an entirely different person. I just don’t really have a set plot planned for this au or have any idea on how to resolve the conflict between Cronus, present timeline Illya and Alphinaud... or if I even wanna give Cronus a happy ending iafnioafas. But whenever there’s an opportunity to talk about time travel au, you bet your gil I will.

2) More Nier Automata AU

I kinda lost steam for this AU really really quickly for some reason but.. I had pretty ambitious plans for the plot of this which I really hope I’ll find the inspiration to write out some day.. because I really don’t like just.. reducing my ideas to simple bullet point headcanons. 

Some brief idea of what I had in mind though:

 bad ending depending on illya’s actions at one of the climatic scenes

different ‘good’ endings depending on her last dialogue choice which would lead to her ending up with different love interests. 

love triangle, of course

side plot for alisaie and ryne involving an escort mission

really really meta writing about the meaning of an android’s life and who 2C feels like she really is

scene of 2C regaining memories of alphinaud’s death and losing her shit

Like I said. I’m a bundle of lots of ideas that are almost always unfulfilled. I still really like this au though and I don’t want it to go to waste...

3) More Modern AU

Oops another AU. At least this one isn’t depressing or something that might give you an existential crisis. I have A LOT of headcanons for modern au ffxiv characters... not to mention different versions of the modern au concept. There’s Youtuber Illya AU, there’s highschool AU, there’s that AU where Illya works at a coffee shop and Alphinaud is a university student. 

I just love how laid back and Slice of Life-y modern au can be and I just... really love the idea of Illya living a normal happy life that doesn’t involve her having to kill gods every other day as much as i do love to torture her, yes. 

Some ideas for modern au fics i had:

Highschool AU Ryne asking her friends to cosplay sailor moon characters for a cosplay convention. Laurelis as Sailor Moon and Haurchefant as Tuxedo Mask. Ryne herself as Sailor Venus. Gaia as Sailor Mars. Illya as Sailor Saturn. 

Youtuber Illya attempting to vlog outside her home for the first time while she’s on a date with Alphinaud because her viewers requested it so much. Just pure fluff and the dorks being dorks. 

Highschool AU Illya working on a set of mini terrarium jewelry to sell at the school fair to raise money. The jocks at the school sort of laugh and lowkey bully her for the idea but she ends up making a ton of money.

SOL comedy AU where alisaie and alphinaud both have a crush on Illya sort of compete for her attention. She’s completely oblivious to all of it. 

Cafe AU where Illya has raised enough money (and with Alphinaud’s generous donation) to send in an entry to university. Alphinaud helps her study for the entrance exam. 

More double dates? :eyes:

4) To Aru Majutsu no Index AU

LOOK SOMETHING I HAVEN’T TALKED ABOUT ON MY BLOG BEFORE. I just really like the premise / setting of this anime. ARE YALL READY FOR WORD VOMIT???

Academy city, a city that houses many schools, and research intuitions devoted to the study and advancement of science. Espers are individuals who use scientifically based supernatural powers, all of whom gained and trained their powers artificially under the system of Academy city. However, there is another underground side to the city - a small organization of people with supernatural abilities that cannot be explained by science. They are called magicians - and due to the rarity of magic, and how Academy city is so repulsed by the idea of abilities that defy the laws of conventional science and their understanding, some people even believe that magic is simply a myth or urban legend. 

While espers typically specialize in only one or two types of ability, magicians are often able to wield a variety of different abilities that take time to train and nurture, making them so frightening to the science side of academy. Some magicians even end up dabbling in the occult or black magic.

Alphinaud, a level 4 esper with the ability to physically see energy waves emitted by other espers. Couple that with his high intelligence, he is able to analyze the movements and abilities of other espers and even pin point the weak points of their abilities. His twin sister Alisaie is also a level 4 esper who is able to teleport herself and one other person she touches a certain distance in a radius around her current location. 

Alphinaud comes across Illya on his home from his training program one day, beaten and exhausted on the side of the road. He wants to call the hospital, but she begs him not to, saying she’s afraid that ‘they’ will find her. He takes her back to his home and nurses her wounds. Not seeing any energy waves being emitted from her, he assumes that she is simply an ordinary citizen. He asks her where her home is and how she ended up injured on the side of the road, but she refuses to tell him.

One day, a fight breaks out on the streets near his home, where a level 5 esper has gone rogue and is attacking innocent bystanders. He asks Illya to stay behind while he and Alisaie takes care of the situation. They are outmatched however, and Illya, watching the situation from the balcony of his home finally decides to step in. She easily incapacitates the esper using a variety of magical abilities the twins have never seen before, draining the man of his energy before returning to heal Alphinaud and Alisaie. 

They question Illya later, and she finally confesses to being a magician who is on the run from an organization who had been keeping her captive for the past few years. She has the ability of perfect memory - being able to memorize spells from any grimoire she reads and utilize the powers for herself, though often at some debilitating cost. The more powerful the spell, the more dire and painful the side effects.  She has been forced to read a total of more than 500 grimoires by now, and only managed to narrowly escape thanks to a mysterious man who took pity on her. 

Due to the side effects of her ability, and also having done nothing but be chained up and forced to read grimoires for the past few years, Illya is physically frail and cannot fend for herself beyond using magical abilities, which she is often hesitant to do.

5) Pokemon AU...carmela im looking

Waiting for @windupnamazu​ to provide more details on her pokemon au buttttt i’ve already been working on illya’s sort of backstory, her pokemon team, alphinaud’s pokemon team and other headcanons regarding this au. Also.. working with an artist regarding illya’s design for this au, which i’m very excited to be able to share =3c Not the time yet tho

I actually talked about a pokemon au with Jam as early as June of last year. I made a pokemon team for illya aaaaaand only half of her original team I had for her over a year ago is still in her current team oops. It’s okay, the retconned ones can stay at home and relax with Lachlan. 

6) More amaurotine stuff

Oh finally something relating to canon. I’ve been thinking about Chloris x Apollo from time to time and honestly I.. really love their dynamic.. despite how sad and lowkey awful Apollo can be towards her. But I think that’s part of the charm of what makes alphinaud and illya’s relationship later so sweet, being able to acknowledge that they had their flaws and learn from them ;w;

I had an idea for Chloris inventing a type of flower with the unintentional suggestion of Apollo, and it later makes an appearance where Alphinaud discovers the flower and asks Illya about it. 

7) The twins... no, not the Leveilleur twins

I think everyone’s talked about their lovechildren more than I have and I’ve already kind of explained why I haven’t made any screens or talked about them at length but.. I really do love them so much ;;;; I wanna find the opportunity to write a fic of them maybe spending a day inside with their army of carbuncles... Also @ancientechos​‘ OC Esme (son of haurche and laurelis) developing a crush on one of them =3c 

Also another idea I had involving them is being taken to the site of some of Illya and Alphinaud’s adventures...

8) Butler AU...hey, anyone remember this? 

Remember when I did several comics back to back and was super motivated for this AU? I do. I miss being motivated and inspired and not like.. wrecked with depression. I have plot points... ALSO INTERACTIONS WITH OTHER OCs WHO JOINED THIS AU???? Maybe one day I’ll find the drive again. At least I was able to finish one plot arc!! Which is more than I can say for most of my other AUs. Someone get me back in the shoujo manga mood!!! please!!

9) Idol AU 

Hey idol AU anon where are you.... WHERE ARE YOU?! YOU STILL HAVEN’T TOLD ME YOUR EXTRA HEADCANONS PLEASE COME BACK

10) More Alphinaud and his interactions with DRK Illya

I’ve already written a good number of fics about this, but I still... wanna do more... Acceptance, unconditional love, Illya learning that he won’t leave her despite all her insecurities and flaws... ILLYA FINALLY LEARNING TO IDK ACCEPT HERSELF. HELP.

I just really like DRK Illya okay, and you can pry the symbolism of her duality with her dark side from my cold dead hands. 

[lucarioisinthevoid]

m!a time. you gotta work with Candys employees and bots for a promotional stunt for 5 asks not including this one! sorry phone guy but a jobs a job.

“Wh-what?! Are you SERIOUS?!” Distressed Simon and everyone else snapped up. “E-excuse me, but- uh- WHAT? We’re stuck trying to deal with HENRY, th-that surely comes FIRST, r-right-“ Sorry boys! IT’S CANDY TIME! “NO! NO, NO, NO!” Simon howled. “I DON’T- I DON’T- STOP THIS. I’M NOT DOING IT.” S o r r y b o y s ! Henry meanwhile just snorted. “Oh, for sure. You will do it. Have fun, I will look after the restaurant. Do not fret, I-“ Oh, no, you’re coming too. “… what?” Yeah, everyone! Anyhow, send out the animatronics- and probably Ethan, seeing as he never leaves Evelyn on her own- to Candy’s. Not sure what “work with” means, but I’m supposing the restaurants get exchanged somewhat. Four animatronics and one guard in exchange! So, who is coming- Candy, Cindy, the penguin and Vinnie? You know what, asker, if you’re still around, please do clarify, I’ll retcon this ask in specific to fit it. Oh also, fair warning, I’m rather uninformed on the overall lore of FNaC, the only thing I remember well is the last game. Jeremy was the only one who seemed excited. “Candy’s? That is a pretty good place too!” Cheerful he said. “I think it would be great to have a cross promotion going on- we’re really similar after all!” Simon was rocking back and forth, while Mike awkwardly tried to pet his shoulders. The youngest one didn’t even seem to notice that anyone was distressed. “Heck! I was even there a time or two!” Marion petted him gently, not commenting however. Everyone was staring at the door. Well- At least this would distract everyone for long enough that the situation they were in seemed less scary. This felt familiar, this was chaos, this was busy work. Jerry rubbed his hands, nervously. Hopefully the new employee was nice. Finally, the door opened. Everyone instantly stood up to greet- A young woman stuck her head through the door, looking sheepish. “Hello? Uhm… is this the location?” “Is there any other around?” Henry instantly asked back, only drawing a giggle out of her. “Oh- yeah, I guess. Hello, I am Mary Schmidt!” Everyone turned to Mike who looked as irritated as them. The brown-haired girl- had no real similarity to him. At least in his opinion. Scoffing the aggressive guard spoke up. “Hey, fuckwit. Move it. If you stand in that door like that, a gust of wind might cut off your fucking head. Why are you standing in that door like that anyways?!” “H-hey, that wasn’t nice! And I’m standing here because-“ Like on cue, she was shoved forward, as two colorful animatronics jumped inside, a blue and a purple cat. “I’m Candy!” “And I’m Cindy!” The pre-recorded voices started playing, as both of them bounced and danced in the middle of the place. “And we’re the cat-companions! We’re here to ensure you have ton and ton of FUN!” Mary chuckled, slightly nervous. “Yeah, very nice, but you don’t have to-“ As they cat spotted the Phone Guy, both of them exchanged a look and moved squarely towards him. Cats just knew if you disliked them. “Hey boss!” Candy started. “I- I’m not-“ “Oh, yes you are!” Cindy continued, grinning maliciously. “You LOOK like a bossman!” Candy continued. “Take good care of us, bossman!” “Yes, be nice to us! We want to be good friends!” For once it wasn’t Mike who’s knuckles were so tensed up that they were white. “Y-yeah, uh-“ Simon forced out. “How about you do- me a favor and move back? That- that would help a LOT!” “But booooooooooooooooooooooooooss-“ Both of them said at the same time, before Mary finally managed to get between them. “Candy, Cindy, that’s enough! I’m sure you made enough of a good first impression- oh- penguin, stop!” She had turned just in time to see the penguin repeatedly driving over Henry’s foot, who didn’t react at all. Back and forth. It wasn’t heavy enough to do instant damage, but it was getting there. Before Mary could rush over there however, Henry had kneeled down and- Whispered something. Instantly the Penguin seized to move. Out of breath and concerned the other guard picked him up. “A-ah, thank you! How did you do that?! I never seen anyone-“ Kindly Henry smiled. “Why, I worked at Candy’s for a short while back in the old days. It was quite a lot of fun and I learned a few exploits.” “Exploits…?” “No worries about that. They are not supposed to have them anymore anyhow, so please do not tell, will you?” Still smiling he put a warm hand on Mary’s shoulder, who hesitantly nodded- Before abruptly turning around. “Wait- where’s Vinnie? He wanted to come along-“ “… Vinnie, you say?” Interested Henry looked around as well. “… how come he WANTED to come?” “Oh- I guess because he’s my friend… at least I think he is…? He’s sometimes a bit difficult-“ The blue Marionette had slowly floated in, its arms and legs dangling and sliding over the ground, like he was being pulled forward by an invisible string, by a bad puppet master, who completely neglected the rest of this being’s body. It was moving straight towards the actual Marionette, who was tensing up instantly. Separating from Jeremy, Marion moved forward, being as tall as he could be- And as Vinnie came to stand in front of him, it tilted its head to side the, far, far, its neck making an uncomfortable sound of metal scratching over metal, its head now being the wrong way around- Then it snapped up, matching the Marionette in height, its eyes suddenly starting to shine- It looked so… … ANGRY… But before either of them could do something, two people rushed up to drag their respective puppet away. Jerry whined. “Please- Marion… please, don’t be so upset-“ Mary was concerned too. “Vinnie, please! Why are you acting up like this? Please be nice to our new co-workers…” Simon was clutching his receiver. “Th-this is gonna go terrible, huh?” “Ah, fuck it. It’s going to be fine. We’ll survive.” Mike carefully put an arm around his partner’s shoulder, inspecting the whole group. Mary seemed competent enough… it would probably not end up in absolute disaster. Hopefully. Mike just prayed this would go over as smoothly as possible. (… I guess asks open for the Candy crew? I’m lowkey considering making them into my own AU versions, but more about that in the next post)