#but that is irrelevant. I wanted to draw her

[earl-grey-crow]

Distracting asks 7 and 8? :}

hiiii <3

7. Draw something that makes you happy, don’t worry about your art skills!

I like drawing my ocs so I drew one of my current ones. :)

8. Name something you are looking forward to?

going home this weekend! and also celebrating someone’s birthday.

[voltttmeter]

Dame Morgana, princess and protector of the Den

[atomic-rattz]

grr all this tmnt iteration stuff is making me TWEAK.. the more aus i see the more im reminded of my own…. I HAVE LIKE FOUR DESIGNS I MEED TO DO RAHHCHDHSNSKS 😭😭🙏🙏🙏🙏

[aberooski]

Updating/redesigning my Enchantix refs for the GX girls to try and ease back into drawing instead of working on Chazzerella and I actually really do need to write really badly like fr this is bad akskskskksksksks

[phagodyke]

mfs will listen to about today on the bus to work like u didn't even Try to have a good day...

[sodisco]

Doing an OC census bc I forget how many I have. This is not a complete list (notable exceptions being val, Frankie, and fil bc I haven't drawn them in a way I like yet... Wait a minute that's a pattern... Whatever) and I'm probably forgetting more of them. Listed name, species, pronouns but you probably can't read it bc it's in sketch ink. Also a couple doodle beetles just for funsies (and to hide some ink bleeding)

[cosmic-kinglet]

Ah, nothing like sketching some angst while listening to a gen z childhood trauma iceberg video

[chanafehs]

My Veilguard review:

Note - I will be honest in saying this is very long and very negative. If you enjoy this game please don't let me be the one to ruin that for you and skip on this post. I will be discussing spoilers. This is just my opinion so please don't crucify me for it.

I think my thoughts about this game were shaky to begin with as I had been exposed to different spoilers and information before the launch. I wasn’t actually expecting this game to be amazing but as someone whose favorite Dragon Age game is Dragon Age 2, which is arguably the weakest in the series (until now), I still went in with the impression I would have a good time regardless. I did not have that at all, in fact towards the end of Act 2 and the beginning of Act 3 all I wanted was for the game to be over. 

The problems for me really started right in the beginning with the Inquisitor character choices and their characterization. No choices for your Warden, no choices for your Hawke, and only three choices for your Inquisitor out of the dozens you made in Inquisition. The romance option just felt like a very polite way of asking if you romanced Solas or not, especially after completing the game where your non-solas romance will only get one letter for you to read, outside of that, the Inquisitor will not even mention them. Disbanding the Inquisition meant basically nothing and vowing to stop Solas felt like it had little bearing on what my Inquisitor said when she showed up. 

The time frame to make Dragon Age 2 was just over a year and somehow included more choices from Origins than Veilguard did with over ten years of production. That is the information that's been banging around in my head throughout this entire game. In Dragon Age 2, we get the consequences of our decisions with Alistair’s fate and we get extra dialogue concerning Isabela/Zevran/Leliana/Anders/Nathaniel + some sidequests. Veilguard couldn’t even give us so much of a mention of our Inquisitor’s friendships and the consequences of those friendships outside of Solas. The Inquisitors themselves are locked into one personality type as well, and regardless if you choose to stop Solas or not, they are very amicable toward him. 

During the second cut scene you get with the Inquisitor in Dock Town, they will go on to ask you about your progress and then go on about Solas. Mind you, my Inquisitor is extremely unsympathetic to Solas and I chose the option to stop him no matter what, so why is it that every time I speak to her, she keeps trying to ask me if Solas is being genuine and that he was her friend? That doesn’t sound like someone who has vowed to stop him. They will also try to draw parallels between you, Rook, and Solas. Even at the end of the game, they will still try to appeal to you to see reason with him. That is essentially all the Inquisitor is there for. Incredibly frustrating. 

Throughout the game you will get missives from the Inquisitor detailing the devastation that is being brought to southern Thedas and every letter feels like more and more of an insult. To keep it short: Southern Thedas as we know it has been essentially wiped out. I think that deserves more than a footnote in some missive most players aren’t even going to see.

So the setting we spent all three games in, that we saved countless times, had our companions and protagonists die for, gets demolished in the background where we cannot see it. Skyhold had to be taken back from demons and whoops, that's not actually something you can do anything about. Nothing the Warden, Hawke, or the Inquisitor ever did mattered at all and it renders everything from the previous games absolutely irrelevant. 

With that aside, the companions are also another issue for me. I found myself having trouble getting attached to any of them and every single time I recruited one I had the internal question “Why are you even here?” None of their companion quests really tie into the story at large, save maybe Harding and Davrin, and they are incredibly boring save for a few cool moments.

The main appeal of Dragon Age for me is the companions, it’s why Dragon Age 2 is my favorite of the series. Despite the overused environments and the rushed production I still had a great time with it because of the companions. I was actually eager to do the companion quests and learn more about them and how they all fit into the main narrative. Even characters I didn’t like, I still understood why they were important to the story. Like I can’t stand Anders but I know why he is there, he has a purpose.

Every companion is painfully amicable towards you even if you decide to be “stern” towards them. I found myself not caring what dialogue option I chose about them because it made absolutely no difference. There is nice, funny nice, and gentle parenting. That is really all you have to work with in terms of the dialogue wheel. It was more difficult to get disapproval than approval and I can probably count on my fingers every time in this game I actually got companion disapproval. There is only one companion in my playthrough that became hardened, Lucanis, and it had virtually no impact on his character other than the fact he leaves for a couple of saves and comes back to kissing your ass. 

Something I actually really liked about BG3 and the previous Dragon Age games was working for your companion approval - this meant actually learning about your companion and what made them tick. If you don't understand them well enough you get disapproval, when you actually listen to their ideas and thoughts you get approval - there is an active effort to get these things. In Veilguard this does not exist and you are essentially promised approval no matter what, meaning there is no encouragement to know who these people are if they're just going to support you regardless.

I have to agree with the Skillup review they made about this game saying that every dialogue option feels like it was made with HR in the room and I one hundred percent agree. This is not how real people talk to each other. This is how teachers talk to toddlers when they want to explain the virtues of sharing toys with their classmates.

It felt honestly insulting at times to be treated like I don’t understand the concept of bigotry, I still have no idea what they were trying to go for with this, like were they trying to appeal to a market of high school boys who hadn’t discovered what empathy was yet? There is zero trust in the player and every dialogue and decision you make in these moments feels handhold-y and preachy. Like Pixar levels of life lessons you learn.

In the moments where I had to settle arguments over coffee and companions not respecting each other's interests, I could not honestly believe this is the same universe with Loghain Mac Tir, Meredith Stannard, fuck even Corypheus. Humor has always existed in Dragon Age and I love the comedic banter between the characters but it was always humor that served as an escape from the oppressive and dark situation around you, here the dark and oppressive situations feel like an escape from the unrelenting friendliness and tone deafness of your companions. 

The companion I probably had the most issue with was Taash and the way they were handled. I’m not going to get too deep into the Bharv scene because even thinking about it makes me cringe but If someone messed up my pronouns and then immediately dropped to do pushups I am most definitely killing us both. Isabela’s explanation is extremely preachy and she proceeds to do the exact thing she says she hates about people messing up pronouns. Anyways. Moving on. 

Taash I think is a good example of how to not write a multiethnic character. I don’t expect a white person like Trick Weekes to understand the first thing that comes with being multiethnic or having strict parents that intersects with that identity but it is most definitely not whatever the hell this is. 

The only thing I can offer here is that as a multiethnic person (my father is Palestinian and my mother is mainly Irish and Seminole) is that there has never been a point in my life where I felt like I had to choose what culture I am let alone give that choice to someone else in my life I just met.

That’s not what being multiethnic is. I do not have to choose between anything - I am whole and I don't need to cut myself into halves and quarters to be accepted.

It also feels subconsciously like you are supposed to choose Rivain as the Qunari are depicted as bigoted and oppressive as they always have been in this game. Knowing all of this really tainted my experiences with them as a character and I understand a lot of other non-binary individuals love the representation they brought on that level but personally, I’m just tired of “queer representation” always coming with racist undertones. Again, this game feels like it always had white queer people in mind, not lgbt poc. 

These kinds of comments are really only made worse knowing what the Qunari take inspiration from - primarily Black and Brown SWANA Muslims. Why should Trick Weekes have any authority over a questline like that is beyond me. 

Also, this sucked. Especially because they said it to Neve too. I don’t really want my non-binary representation sprinkled with Misogyny as well, especially since we can’t really call Taash out on this comment unless you’re playing a woman (as far as I know).

Aside from Taash, I thought the writing around Harding was strange. Don’t me wrong, I love Harding, but I do not remember her being this friendly and people-pleasing in the Inquisition. If you play as a Dalish elf the first thing she says is she’s surprised that you would care about anyone else - there is absolutely no inclination of this kind of perspective in Veilguard. Additionally, despite knowing everything Solas has done and the consequences that had on her ancestors, she still tries to push you to reason with him?

All of her quests about learning about the Titans, experiencing and embracing their anger, and you still want to appeal to Solas? That was another thing I found so weird about this game, throughout the entire story you are being told again and again that Solas cannot be trusted, he is to blame for everything, and will stab you in the back and yet it seems like every companion tries to push back on you if you agree with this viewpoint? 

Also, something I didn't know at this point of the game but I do now is that Solas had killed Varric and she does know this so why is she acting like this knowing Solas had killed her friend who she spent years with?

Genuinely this whole game felt like: Devs: Solas is a villain

Rook: okay understood

Devs: actually nvm you don't understand him if you think he's a villain

The only companion quests I was actually genuinely interested in were Emmrich and his thoughts around death and becoming a lich. Lucanis' quests had the best boss fights for sure. Outside of that, it felt like “Go here with Bellara” or “Go here with Taash” and it got so grating I couldn’t wait for these quests to be over so I could progress with the main story. It felt like an annoying back-and-forth game to finish a main quest just to finish all the companion quests and then go back to the main quest. Like a list of chores to get through before you can have any fun. 

The inclusion of characters like Morrigan and Isabela in this universe was extremely hollow and they do not feel like the Morrigan and Isabela we know at all. With Morrigan there is a bit of an explanation to this with the essence of Mythal however she reiterates that it is still herself and it is only the memories of Mythal that remain inside of her.

In my canon playthroughs of Dragon Age, I romanced both Morrigan and Isabela, so I was curious to see how the developers would address their pasts with our Warden and Hawke. Unfortunately, the answer is that they don’t address it at all. Morrigan hardly mentions her past, leaving us to wonder if Kieran even exists. The game implies that the relationship between Morrigan and the Warden is insignificant; a codex entry oddly suggests, in a very slut-shamey way, that Morrigan had more lovers than there are trees in the forest. Isabela doesn't reference Hawke either, as she fondly remembers Kirkwall for found family and friendship. It seems that if you romanced Isabela or Morrigan, congratulations—your canon doesn’t exist.

I will echo the statement others have made about all the cameos feeling like mascots because that is really what they are. There is no substance to any of them, Isabela only feels like she is there to be a supportive voice for Taash, Morrigan will only really talk about Solas and Mythal-Dorian is the only one who actually gets a substantial quest related to him. I thought he was fine minus the "illegal slavery" bit because what is illegal slavery Dorian. Next up we will discuss legal murder.

Another thing that genuinely broke the immersion for me in this game is how awful the armor is. It is a Dragon Age game so I wasn't expecting Haute Couture but the design is all over the place and nothing looks right. Not to mention the extremely weird orientalist undertones that follow the Lords of Fortune everywhere. The outfit Isabela is wearing is even worse in person and I tried to give this game the benefit of the doubt by thinking we would be getting some underwater mission with her and that would be the explanation behind her bikini outfit - this did not happen.

The belly dancer-esque outfits with the coin-bedazzled turbans were pretty egregious and made me want to limit my time in Rivain as much as possible. For a game released in 2024, I am disappointed we are still dealing with the same Orientalist fantasy tropes. Even the Qunari are more naked in this game than I had ever seen previously. At least DA2 and DAI gave them pants. But hey the Antaam are all blighted and evil so who cares right.

Speaking of the Antaam, a lot of the antagonist motivations for this game genuinely did not make sense to me. The Antaam are suddenly giving up their fear of magic to pair up with...the Venatori? To fight for the elven gods? It honestly felt like they had no idea who to make fight for the Evanuris so they just pulled two of the baddies from the Inquisition and went "We can just use them and call it done". When you press for information on why this is the answer is always a mustache-twirling dialogue about power. Nothing much deeper from that than any of the villains besides Solas. All of the villains, especially Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain, are extremely one-dimensional and have no motivations other than being evil and striving for power. At least Corypheus had cool lines.

I'm not going to get too deep into lore changes since I know a lot of things happened in the comics, books, and TV show (all of which I did not read or watch) but I honestly do think it's a bad idea to have a "soft reboot" while needing to read several books to understand everything. That's not being welcoming to new players that's homework. If you wanted a soft reboot probably don't start off with half your plot and characters coming from various comics and novels people need to catch up on.

The portrayal of the Dalish in this game is inconsistent. When we inform them that their gods are evil and planning to overthrow the world, they respond, "Okay, heard you." How can they accept this explanation so readily? In previous interactions, Solas shared that the Dalish did not listen to him and even threatened him when he revealed this truth. Yet, when we present the same information, they believe us almost immediately. Is there no pushback or skepticism? The Dalish accept everything about the evil elven gods meanwhile Andraste’s followers remain completely unaffected by these revelations.

I think what frustrated me even more was watching our elven companions express grief and regret over the actions of the elven gods like they had something to do with it, painting the Dalish as adjacent to oppressors when they themselves are oppressed in every way. The only thing that remains consistent is the sad boy Solas act about it.

At the end of the game, two of my companions - Harding and Emmrich- were killed. Emmrich's death was unfortunately overshadowed by a zoom-in on a rock and I had no idea he had died until I got the popup. Still, all I can think about is just going "Rock moment" when he died. I don't really have anything negative to say about Harding's death other than the way she went out was fitting for her narrative. Bellara got blighted and there were no consequences for this and she walked away from it - forgive me but I am still under the DAO impression that if you get blighted that's game over but all the rules about the Blight have been changed in this.

I decided to trick Solas, and honestly, I don’t have anything negative to say about it, except that Solas should have noticed me holding the fake dagger since it was clearly in his line of sight. I liked the idea of outsmarting the god of trickery. While it wasn’t extremely satisfying, but I’m okay with how it turned out.

Even as the credits began rolling I still have trouble believing rook's role in any of this. Just the persistent nagging idea that they really just have no place in this story at all. In the beginning I wanted to see how Rook is looped into all of this and how they become central to the fight against Solas but just like with most of the companions, I have no idea why they are here. This should've been the Inquisitor's story to finish.

I'm not going to pretend that everything about this game was irredeemable and terrible. There were genuinely parts I enjoyed and had a good time with. The romance ending scene with Neve was fantastic, even though it took a long time to get there. Davrin was an unexpected aspect of the game that I actually liked, as I never cared much for Grey Wardens before, but he changed my perspective. Harding's mention of the Inquisition was also very sweet. Although I wasn't particularly invested in Emmrich, I loved the conclusion to his quest when he became a lich lord.

While I'm not the biggest Solas fan, I actually really enjoyed the cutscenes between him and Rook because one of my aims with this game was the ability to be mean to Solas and kick him while he was down. They definitely delivered there even though everyone else kept disagreeing with me.

The worlds are beautiful and the CC is definitely the best we've gotten in any Dragon Age game, I spent probably a solid hour in there. The hairstyles are great and the four unibrow choices? Bioware you shouldn't have <3.

Overall I definitely didn't have the best time with this game and towards the end of act 2 I was incredibly bored and the combat became repetitive and stagnant enough that I turned down the difficulty to get through it faster. I can't see myself replaying this any time soon and I am unsure what my stance on Dragon Age is now, do I Ignore this game ever existed or do I carve out everything I liked and pretend this is the Dragon Age I love? I have no idea, I am disappointed at how this game leaves us off and I really wanted to sit here and say It's good but I can't.

I think this game will reach out to and resonate with a different group of Dragon Age fans than me, I just wish I could enjoy it as much as I see other people doing. I was originally going to give this game a 3/10 but knowing you can pet the cats I will give it a very generous 3.5/10.

[saphiccarma]

- The Red Means I Love You

Relationships - Mob Boss!WandaNat x Reader

Summary - You almost get killed again before some comfort with your girlfriends.

Warnings: Violence but nothing really

Pt.1 Pt. 2 Pt. 3 Pt. 4

The rifle was shoved firmly against your shoulder, the material pressed through your tactical suit. You twisted a nob, fixing the scope and letting it adjust properly before exhaling slowly. You had done this hundreds of times before. This was nothing.

Just another person to kill, another person to cross off the list that Natasha gave you. It was someone irrelevant. You had no idea who they were, or how important they were, but all that mattered was Natasha told you to do it. You didn't dig into their life at all - you soon learned that it only made things worse. Even as is, guilt throbbed in your stomach as you waited for your target to show themselves. The cement was hard from where you laid against it. Your shoulders ached from sitting out here all day.

Earmuffs quieted the world around you. The bustling of the streets as people went about their day. Birds circling overhead as they flew around in search of food. Music blaring from the apartments below you. It was all silenced by the muffs you wore. That was a dangerous thing, you couldn't hear a single thing - it left you vulnerable. Natasha had told you to leave them off whenever you weren't shooting, but you were too exhausted to remember.

Natsha had been working you into the ground.

Day and night on jobs. Whatever she wanted you to do. Kill someone? You would do it. Spy on someone for days straight? Yes ma'am. It was never a question of how morally bad the task was. Morals didn’t matter in this line of business. You knew better than to question her. Your body ached with a constant dull pain from constantly moving. You were always doing something. Whether it was in bed or out in the world or training with someone else. There was never a minute for rest for you.

Even still, that was not an excuse to get sloppy.

Evidence of that was a knife pressed against your throat and the earmuffs ripped from your head.

"Hi again," a voice whispered in your ear and you instantly knew who it was, muscles locking up tighter than before, "It's nice to see you." The cool metal dug into your skin, almost deep enough to draw blood but not quite. Your fingers twitched from where they sat on the rifle. "Now, I'm going to remove this knife, and you are going to stand up slowly, hands off the gun."

You waited with bated breath as she removed the knife from your skin, and you heard her take a few steps back. Carefully, you stood, removing your hands from the rifle. The instant you turned around and caught a glimpse of her taunting smirk, you reared your hand back and swung. It landed solidly against her cheek, her head snapping to the side.

She chuckled, spitting blood out onto the ground, "So that's how you want to play it?"

There wasn't even a second for you to react before she was lunging at you, throwing a payback punch. Your cheek throbbed with a newfound pain. The fight that ensued was a mix of grace and pure brutality. Rio's eyes were alight, a devious glint in them that promised pain. You were only focused on not dying.

Her punches landed nearly every time, but she rarely threw them - only when she knew they would hit. It was a smart tactic; you had to give her that. She was a good fighter, graceful in every movement she made. You admired that. Natasha taught you to be graceful, but you leaned on the side of being aggressive. It was odd since you didn't like violence. But that didn't matter when in a fight, as seen now.

The two of you traded blows, Rio dodging yours with little laughs, taunting you. Frustration boiled inside of you and your movements grew less strategic. They were desperate blows; you could tell you were losing. There was no way you could win this. But you weren't someone to give up.

Blood leaked from your lips from a nasty right hook and Rio had a black eye already forming. Both of you stood, breathless, for a moment, taking each other in. Rio had more time, expertise, she was more experienced. You barely had a year, maybe not even that, while she had who knows how long. You didn’t stand a chance.

For a moment, a crazed grin split your lips to match Rio's. Adrenaline pumped through you, buzzing beneath your veins and making you feel alive. There was a rush of what almost felt like joy. Although it was more like exhilaration - joy was the wrong word. There was no joy in fighting. It only lasted for a brief second before the two of you were at it again, dancing around each other in a skilled dance. Eventually, Rio got the better of you.

Shoving at your shoulders, Rio pushed you into a planter box. You spluttered as the wood dug into your bag and knocked the wind out of you. Rio stood above you, licking blood from her lips, and her eyes shining with pure mischief.

"You're cute," She whispered, a tugged her knife out. Your fingers tug into the planter box at the sight of it, chest heaving as you tried to regain your breath. The knife was pressed onto your neck, "Listen to me," Rio crouched and then leaned until she was right in front of your face, breath warm, "This is not a battle you will win. I was sent to kill you, but you're fun, so I'll leave you alive for now." Her words sent a flash of desperation through you and panic seized your thoughts. Gasping, you went to grab at her wrist. You weren't sure what you were going to do, but before you could Rio pulled back, smirking furiously before she was gone. Just like that she was bolting down the stairs.

That did not just happen.

You shut your eyes for a moment only to open them a second later. The sun was slowly setting, the sky a dusty pink with a few hues of blue in there. It was beautiful sight, unlike the blood that slowly leaked onto your lips, metallic and salty as you licked it. Rio had nailed a solid punch to your nose. It mixed with the blood that slowly bled from your lips as well, a small cut there.

Slowly, you shoved yourself off the planter box, groaning at the throbbing pain, but you snatched up your rifle and made your way down the roof. Time to head home. Your motorcycle was waiting for you once you climbed down the several flights of stairs. Going down was just about as hard as going up.  The helmet fit snuggly on your face, almost too snuggly that it was pressing against all your bruises. Regardless, you sped off, making your way to the house.

Natasha and Wanda had been doing digging for months, searching for some evidence as to what was going on. Danvers clearly had a part in it, from what you could tell, but Stark had gone radio-silent ever since that man came to the doorstep of the base. Another name that came up frequently was Agatha, and now this scuffle with Rio only made things clear they were part of it. You had to tell Wanda and Natasha, and maybe you could have some more quality time together.

As busy as they were, they made time for you. Slowly Wanda became part of your routine. She was confusing at first. Hot and cold, sweet and harsh. You never knew what to expect from her, but that was part of the excitement. However, a routine slowly built that you were familiar with. Wanda became as important of a part of your life as Natasha.

Your motorcycle buzzed to a stop as you parked it in the driveway, sliding your helmet off. The rifle strap dug uncomfortably into your shoulder; it was heavy for your tired body. Making your way to the door, you fumbled with the key in your pocket, pulling it out.

Key in lock. Key in lock. Turn the key.

It wasn't that difficult, but your fingers trembled around the key, and you eventually got the lock to turn.

You stumbled into the house, droplets of blood staining your hands and dirt underneath your nails. After you first killed someone, Natasha began sending you out on more solo mission, killing more people. It still hurt, a dull ache constantly thrumming in your chest. Tears would swell in your eyes at night when you lay awake, breathless and naked, while Natasha and wanda slept on your sides. But you were able to shove all the emotions down in favor of the sweet praise you got from your girlfriends when you got home. It made all killing worth it - at least that's what you told yourself.

Your fingers fumbled with the latch on your holster, finally pulling your gun out after a moment. It left the holster with a soft click, and you set the gun down on the table next to the door, taking your belt off next. You dropped the rifle next to the door and threw your keys onto the table so that they clattered softly.

Sinking to your knees, you fell face first onto the cool, wooden floor and turned so that your cheek was resting against it. The cold soothed the warm fire pulsing through your veins. You exhaled slowly, your eyes fluttering shut and you could hear soft footsteps coming down the stairs. You didn't have to look up to know it was Wanda, and she glided past you smoothly, heading into the kitchen. Her vanilla scent lingered. It had become a routine now, where you would just collapse on the floor.

It was part of your process. There was a familiarity to just lying on the floor, something plain and simple. Absently, you picked at your own fingernails, trying to erase the feeling of violence on them, the lingering trail of blood you slowly began to leave. You were so different from where you first started out, despising the business but being forced into it. Now you were killing people for a living. The thought of it made your insides churn anxiously and your eyes flutter shut. It was what you had to do. It made your girlfriends happy. Now that - that made butterflies erupt in your stomach whenever you thought of them. They were perfect.

For the next several minutes, maybe half an hour even, you let the floor comfort you. Swallowing thickly, you pushed yourself off the floor, legs shaky beneath you. It nearly physically hurt, you wobbled towards the living room, hoping on of your girlfriends would be there. Sure enough, you saw Natasha's hair pulled into a loose ponytail, a book resting in front of her from where she sat elegantly on the couch. Her legs were tucked beneath her as she flipped the pages. You staggered over, limbs screaming from the physical battle you just had, and- didn't make it. You fell just before you were able to land on the soft cushions, instead your knees sinking to floor and head landing on Natasha's shin.

You knew she glimpsed your face, but she didn't ask about the blood or the bruises, just offered quiet comfort. You appreciated the lack of questions. If she asked you weren't sure if you would be able to form a coherent answer, not with how exhausted you were.

Her bare skin was cool in a comforting way. You whined into her skin, head limp and body sore with dull pain. Her soft laugh echoed above you as her hand slid into your hair, gently tugging on all the tangles. The touch made your eyes close once again, leaning into her. She brushed her hand through your hair rhythmically, occasionally teasing the hair on your neck and scratching with her fingernails, but still gentle. She lulled all your worried thoughts with a soothing touch. Then after a few minutes, her fingers grabbed at your hair, tugging your head back. You whined petulantly, eyes opening reluctantly.

"Up." Her words were hardly directed at you, eyes still trained on her book, but you obeyed the command. The minute you were on your feet, Natasha spread one of her arms out, a silent invitation. Her eyes were still trained on the book, but you knew she was waiting. You fell into her lap; your legs bracketed her hips as your head landed on her shoulder. She hummed, pleased, and her arm snaked around you, stroking up and down your back while the other held her book.

You sat there for a while, listening to the soothing beat of her heart that was clear and steady beneath you. Every minute or so her hand would love your back to turn the page of the book, the ruffling sound just barely audible to your fuzzy mind. You could feel the fog slowly coming over, all worries leaving you completely with every second that ticked by. There was nothing coherent in your head, just absorbing Natasha's quiet comfort.

Your hands had buried into her shirt at some point, and lips began teasing her neck. It was nothing special, just a needy girl searching for something intimate without starting something you didn't have the energy to finish. Natasha's skin was pulled between your teeth as you alternated between softly biting and shallow sucking. Even as you did something, your eyes were squeezed shut, and soon enough even those small movements stopped.

Wanda came in, her footsteps soft as her baggy pants swished around her ankles. She wore a soft smile on her face, eyes amused as she took in the sight of her wife and you on the couch. Her hands found your hair the minute she came over, sinking onto the couch next to you, drawing a small sigh out of you. You shoved your face further into Natasha's neck. Wanda laughed, amused, but the sound hardly reached your ears.

"Sweet girl," she whispered, "It's time for some food."

It was as if you didn't register her words, still drawn into a certain headspace by Natasha's soothing movements. Natasha gave her wife an amused smile, finally looking away from her book for the first time and setting it down on the side table. Sighing softly, Wanda pecked Natsha on the cheek. Then it evolved into more, their lips melding together and tongues clashing. Both of their bodies pressing against you woke you up a bit and you began squirming in Natasha's lap.

They both chuckled against each other's mouths but otherwise ignored you. You whined quietly and sat up so that you could grab Natasha's collar, politely shoving Wanda away, before you pressed your lips onto Natasha's.

"There's our girl," Wanda mumbled, her hand in your hair tugging you back. An immature sound escaped your mouth as your eyes finally opened. Wanda raised a brow, questioning if you really wanted to go down this road when you protested to her hauling you up. And as unsteady as your legs were, you let her guide you into the kitchen. A warm meal was ready for you. But instead of heading to the table, she led you to the sink, her hands gripping your waist until she hauled you up onto the counter.

You made a small sound of protest, still surprised at her strength. Wanda pulled a cloth from the counter and ran it under the sink water. Gently, she pressed it against your face, softly hushing you when you flinched and whined. It was cool against the warmth of your skin from being shoved in Natasha’s neck, but it helped dull the pain that pulsed through your cuts. She dabbed away at your wounds, cleaning them up softly while Natasha plated some food for the three of you.

"What happened?" It was phrased as a harmless question, but there was a dangerous undertone to Wanda's words. You hesitated, eyes flickering down to look at the ground. Wanda pressed down particularly hard, and your gaze snapped back to her with a glare, "What happened?"

You shook your head, "Nothing."

Wanda sighed but let it go and in turn you let her guide you to the table, setting you down at a chair for food. You inhaled slowly. Everything was fine. You were fine. It was all going to be fine.

Taglist: @macaroni676 @gaylorvader @ashadash0904 @sunshine-makes-flowers-grow @wolfangnight @rosekjsses @jessycatatiana

[witchpassing]

“I’m beginning to think, darling-” She taps the crop against her thigh in thought, folded leather tip level with your eyeline. “-that this may be just a little counterproductive.”

“Miss?” You shift on your knees, suddenly unsure where she’s going with this. There is a routine, an understood sequence of events, anticipation-ordeal-catharsis. Deviations are - unusual.

“I mean, look at you.” The crop strokes your cheek; a flinch, a caught breath, a lingering, flutter-eyed shudder that terminates at the base of your spine. “Can’t even pretend you don’t want it. Takes the edge off somewhat, considering that this is meant to be a punishment. Does it not?”

You do not comment - rhetorical question, response optional - but the rapt attention with which your eyes follow the crop as it settles back into its tap, tap, tap is tell enough.

A laugh. She steps away, tosses her tool upon the low table at the centre of the room; the widening gap tugs a string in your chest, but you have not been told to move. “How many was it this time, doll?” she asks, drawing the pin from her hair. It cascades along her spine, agate-black, heavy as silk. She doesn’t really need to ask, but this time there comes a delicate little hook woven into the skein of the words, and to answer is compulsion.

You swallow. The mechanisms of your throat tick like the tumbling of a lock. “Fifty, Miss.”

She makes a contemplative little hn as she steps behind the folding screen. (An exquisite image of a blood orchid roils upon the silk.) “You know, what I would do is have one of your sisters take it. Cinnabar, perhaps, or Silky.” A small pause for your hitched breath to drop into - time to picture Silky’s tears, Cinnabar’s silent, shuddering resilience - before she continues. “Unfortunate, isn’t it, that they’re in town this afternoon.”

“Perhaps we could–

“No, no,” she says, plucking the sentence from your tongue like a heron with a fish. “No deferrals. I know how important schedule is to keeping you in tune.” You nod your gratitude and wait, violin-string tense, for what comes next.

The witch emerges naked, and everything else in the room becomes immediately and totally irrelevant. She moves without haste, feet silent amid the cloudlike thickness of the rug, sparing not a moment’s regard for the wordless adoration that courses along the lines of her flesh - almost. Not quite. Despite her efforts, you catch the mote of a smile in her gaze as it passes across you. She is no great actress, your Lady, and she loves to be seen.

Then: “I suppose it can’t be helped,” she says, a little sigh of mock resignation. She stretches herself belly-down upon the chaise lounge, catlike, radiant in her shamelessness, and flicks her eyes at you.

“What are you waiting for, sweetheart?” she says. “Begin.”

The crop lies on the table between you; you’d quite forgotten, addle-brained thing that you are, that it was still there. You balk, of course, stutter and freeze, dread blooming in your chest like icewater. Direct order, you have to, but- but–

“I don’t want any fooling around, you understand?” she says. Oh, she’s really beginning to enjoy herself now. She wriggles, settling into the give of the upholstery as if she plans on taking a nap. You can hardly hear her over the tchk tchk tchk of your internals shifting up several gears at once - and yet her voice asserts itself, the very forefront of your mind, sparing you not a syllable. “Do it properly; if I don’t feel it then there’s really no point, is there? As for location, the back of the thighs or-”

“Miss please I can’t-”

“You will.”

You are on your feet, your fingers curling around the hilt of the crop, every string drawn taut. It’s true; you will.

“Don’t worry, love.” She smiles over the crook of her folded arm, and oh, she says it so kindly, as if she isn’t extracting from you a blasphemy. A sliver of honey-gold eye beneath the feather of her lashes, warm and merciless. “I’ll keep count for you.”

[late-draft]

One, two, three... a couple of moments in narrative, or all of them viewed isolated, could be called "misinterpretation" and "an incurable case of shipping goggles" but when the events start piling up and staying consistent between each other, every new one adds context to the previous events.

Zuko keeps Katara's necklace for 10 episodes? Oh it's a plot device so he can track them. Zuko steadies Katara so she doesn't fall off of the shirshu? Oh anyone would fall off of it while paralyzed. Katara jokes about giving a kiss to Zuko for the necklace? Oh she's uh... teasing Aang to whom this completely goes over head? Iroh keeps encouraging annoying love songs during music nights on the ship? Oh it's typical content for sailors. Zuko randomly recites cringe poetry after basically ending a fight in a draw against Katara while he's clearly running out of time? Oh it's the Rule of Cool. Katara randomly defends Zuko's hairstyle when Sokka insults it? She's uhh... defending Sokka's hairstyle even though Sokka didn't insult his own hairstyle (honestly I have no other explanation for this one). Katara is in Zuko's personal space 5 minutes after they started talking without being on opposing sides? She's uhh just that much empathetic. Zuko smiles at her on the very same day they let him stay near them? Uhhh... He waits an entire night awake to apologize to her? Uhh he's just a master manipulator hiding his selfish motives he's really sorry and would do this for anyone. Katara's glued to his side since their hug? Uhh she's empathetic. Zuko plants himself next to Katara during the play and won't budge? Uhh he's just socially unskilled (for now due to abuse) and does't quite understand what Aang wants from him. Zuko intercepts lightning for Katara in slow motion? It's the Rule of Cool again.

All of these things are true, but it's also true that when viewed as a whole... the narrative is portraying something. Reality is everything, the purposeful and the pointless. But theatrical stories pick and choose what to show, and we are taught how to interpret shorthands. Good writing won't have pointless or unconnected events. Neither is it smart to over-animate irrelevant actions.

And I purposefully didn't even list any of the symbolism or outside events that don't "originate" from the characters themselves (other than Iroh's actions because it's hilarious).

[ai-manre]

The way that characters keep accusing Jon of fucking someone just because he's kind and open-minded and wants to protect people...

Sam:

Jon drew his longsword. He dared defy Ser Alliser only to a point, and he feared he was well beyond it now.

Thorne smiled. "The Bastard wishes to defend his lady love, so we shall make an exercise of it. Rat, Pimple, help our Stone Head here." Rast and Albett moved to join Halder. "Three of you ought to be sufficient to make Lady Piggy squeal. All you need do is get past the Bastard." - Jon IV, AGOT

The plan was Chett's. He was the clever one; he'd been steward to old Maester Aemon for four good years before that bastard Jon Snow had done him out so his job could be handed to his fat pig of a friend. When he killed Sam Tarly tonight, he planned to whisper, "Give my love to Lord Snow," right in his ear before he sliced Ser Piggy's throat open to let the blood come bubbling out through all those layers of suet. - Prologue, ASOS

Melisandre:

Jon could feel her heat, even through his wool and boiled leather. The sight of them arm in arm was drawing curious looks. They will be whispering in the barracks tonight. - Jon I ADWD

Alys:

"A wildling. A filthy, murdering wildling." Cregan's hands closed into fists. The gloves that covered them were leather, lined with fur to match the cloak that hung matted and stiff from his broad shoulders. His black wool surcoat was emblazoned with the white sunburst of his house. "I see what you are, Snow. Half a wolf and half a wildling, baseborn get of a traitor and a whore. You would deliver a highborn maid to the bed of some stinking savage. Did you sample her yourself first?" - Jon X, ADWD

Satin:

Ser Malegorn stepped forward. "I will escort Her Grace to the feast. We shall not require your … steward." The way the man drew out the last word told Jon that he had been considering saying something else. Boy? Pet? Whore? - Jon X, ADWD

Val:

"Easily remedied." Florent's smile was so false that it looked painful. "Where is she, Lord Snow? Have you moved her to one of your other castles? Greyguard or the Shadow Tower? Whore's Burrow, with t'other wenches?" He leaned close. "Some say you have her tucked away for your own pleasure. It makes no matter to me, so long as she is not with child. I'll get my own sons on her. If you've broken her to saddle, well … we are both men of the world, are we not?" - Jon X, ADWD

The watch is constantly whispering and gossiping about his sexual deviant tastes because he's?? Nice and kind to people?? Irrelevant of who they are??

[hiiikiko]

Ellie x Chubby reader :3 ?

𝕖𝕝𝕝𝕚𝕖 𝕨. 𝕩 𝕔𝕙𝕦𝕓𝕓𝕪!𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕖𝕣

tlou m.list

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹

ellie williams x chubby!reader headcanons

[a/n: i tried]

‧˚₊•┈┈┈┈୨୧┈┈┈┈•‧₊˚⊹

୨୧ ellie is convinced your figure was sculpted by the god of olympus themself because how could someone be so perfect??

୨୧ before she ever approaches you, she studies you from afar, sketching you in the margins of her notebook and maybe even on her worksheets

୨୧ she thinks you’re so fuckin hot, your curves, your smile, your style? ugh, they all tie in so perfectly together

୨୧ one day after class, the two of you are the last to leave and she finally works up enough nerve to ask you out

୨୧ ellie is a homebody, so she invites you to her place for movie night! (this is her go to date i fear)

୨୧ she can barely pay attention to the movie with how close you are, her eyes constantly darting over to you and she chuckles awkwardly anytime you lock eyes

୨୧ after five awkward eye locks, she mutters under her breath ‘fuck it’ and leans over to give you a kiss

୨୧ it would’ve been perfect, if only you weren’t looking the other direction, causing ellie’s face to push into your hair

୨୧ she could DIE from embarrassment as you giggle and try your best to reassure her that it’s okay and that you’re surprised she even likes you like that

୨୧ her head whips back in surprise like what do mean?? why wouldn’t she like you?? you’re a goddess put on this earth for her to worship??

୨୧ she tells you that of course she likes you! and even if you say something about how you don’t fit the beauty standard, she’ll shrug it off and say that those kinda things are irrelevant in her mind because to her, you are the perfect example of beauty

୨୧ she even, in a moment of passion, pulls out her notebooks and shows you all the little drawings of you to emphasize how beautiful you really are

୨୧ after the two of you start dating, she’s on top of the world, she feels like she won the lottery

୨୧ if you struggle with body image, she’ll comfort you and do tons of research to understand what you’re going through

୨୧ if it’s your family that’s the problem, she’ll want to have a ‘word’ with them but after you talk her out of that, she’ll just reassure you that you are beautiful and you don’t need to change for anyone

୨୧ now, if its some douche bags on campus that say that? its a whole different story, you’ll have to be holding her back because she’d try to run them down but you remind her that it wouldn’t be worth losing her scholarship over (she totally thinks it is but she doesn’t wanna worry you, so she nods and goes back to your dorm room)

୨୧ overall, ellie loves you! she doesn’t see beauty the way the rest of the size obsessed world does, she loves you for you ♡

[foreverisntenough]

‘OURS’

Summary: You were his and he was yours but what would it be like adding one more? Thrust into a whirlwind romance you never could’ve imagined that became your forever love. You continue building a new life across the pond with a very beautiful Scouser. A sequel to the ‘You’re Mine’ fic.

INDEX

Warnings: This series is 18+ and will contain fluff, suggestion, SMUT (unprotected sex,) pregnancy, parenting, mental health struggles, eating disorder, self doubt, body image issues, daddy kink, angst, alcohol consumption - not sure what else really… if i miss anything please lmk!

Note: Thank you for reading! Please be sure to like, comment, or message me what you think of the series! Try not to nitpick with any real pregnant/ baby logistics it’s better if you just read along happily.

P.S. Thank you so much for completing this series. 'You're Mine' and 'Ours' have been a massive labor of love and so much fun to write. I hope you have enjoyed all 60 chapters! There will be epilogue but until then... The End.

Chapter 30 - 'All Ours' | ‘Ours’ - The Final Part

word count - 14.2 k

Trent was on the carpet in your living room sat in between your legs as you were sitting on the couch behind him. Teddy was on the couch next to you sitting in Marcel’s lap as the four of you watched a NBA game on the TV that night. Maybe the four of you watching is a stretch. Marcell and Trent were watching. Teddy was bothering Marcel with irrelevant and unrelated questions. You were occupied playing with Trent’s hair, scratching at his scalp, occasionally massaging his shoulders. You were just keeping your hands on him. You couldn’t get enough of him lately. You still had yet to tell your families about the pregnancy. You were hiding in sweat sets and t-shirts of Trent’s lately attempting to hide your slightly now more noticeable bump. Trent leaned his cheek against the inside of your thigh as he kissed your knee. 

“Celly, know mama has a baby?” Teddy asked Marcel, looking up at him as she pulled at his shirt begging for more attention. You were just far away enough that you couldn’t clearly make out what they were actually talking about but also you were in such a trance focused on Trent you weren’t really trying to listen in either.

“Yeah, I know. You're Mummy’s baby, Ted.” Marcel cooed, confirming what he assumed she was talking about. He kept his focus on the game though. She scrunched her nose, annoyed he didn’t understand her and that he didn’t actually pay much attention to her.

“No, in her tummy, tay?” She tried to correct him, looking at him with a ‘duh’ type face like how could he not know she was talking about a new baby.

“What?” He whispered to her bringing his face close to hers but flicked his eyes to you and Trent with confusion over her. He was shocked to say the least. 

“A Celly.” Teddy attempted to clarify what she was talking about pulling his attention back to her. His eyes widened. It took him a moment before he was able to compute what she was referring to saying you had ‘a Celly.’ He debated for a moment if Teddy was like just talking nonsense or if she was serious.  Was he supposed to tell you and Trent he knew? What if you were not pregnant and he asked? He didn’t want to offend you. He grappled with the thought for a second.

“Ted, can I tell mummy and daddy what you told me?” Marcel asked her loud enough to draw the attention of Trent. He furrowed his brow but disregarded them and wrote it off as something silly Marcel and Teddy usually talked about. 

“Nooos, it’s secret Celly!” Teddy yelped. Trent shook his head with a smile at her not knowing what she was yelling about. Marcel dragged his finger between his lips and locked it at the corner's edge, signaling to Teddy he’d keep their secret but his mind was racing. He needed to know. A little while later you had gone upstairs and put Teddy to bed after Marcel and Trent said a lengthy goodnight to her filled with her giggles. When you came back down, they had moved to the cinema to play a game of FIFA.  You made your way there to find them but didn’t say anything or even acknowledge them really when you went in. You just cuddled up to Trent and fell asleep on him in the dark room. Trent made sure you were tight to him, laying his hands with his game controller onto your back keeping you so. As they played, sporadically he’d whisper ‘I love yous’ to you and kiss your hair. 

“Bro…” Marcel turned in his seat to look at Trent as they waited for the next game to load and start. Trent raised his eyebrows confused what Marcel’s impatient facial expression was for. “Sooo…” Marcel waved his hand at Trent to signal him to start talking but Trent gave no response. “You and Y/N….” He finally just spelled it out for his brother who was just taking too long for him.. 

“Oh... Fuck. Mate, it’s not obvious right? Were you able to just tell?” Trent babbled out quietly but relatively panicked. He looked down at your body and tried to examine you hidden under the baggy clothes trying to deduce if Marcel had been able to make out your bump visually. “We’re supposed to go to mums tomorrow. You think she’ll be able to tell? We were trying to wait to tell everyone.” Trent’s anxiety over ruining something you were fairly excited about doing washed over him.

“Wait so you are?!?” Marcel yelped out but bit his lips tightly closed after hoping he didn’t wake you with his excited outburst.  

“Yeah. We’ll she is or we are. I’m so happy.” Trent cooed gently, turning his focus to you. He smiled brushing his hand over hair before kissing your temple.

“Damn, that’s amazing. But nah, I couldn’t just tell. I had no idea. I don’t think mum will know either. Your daughter just yaps more than you and she told me.” Marcel smiled simultaneously taking a jab at Trent whilst letting him know that Teddy had spilled the beans. 

“Oh dammit, Ted. I knew she wouldn’t keep it to herself. Evidently, she doesn’t really understand a pinky promise and I guess the concept of secrets either.” Trent laughed, Marcel did along with him. Teddy wasn’t the most tight lipped.  

“Bro, this is sick… I’m so happy for you guys. How is she?” He nodded towards you. He wanted to make sure you were fine. If anyone knew the depth of how bad things had gotten it was Marcel. 

“Yeah, she’s been all good so far. She’ll do amazing. I know that.” Trent smiled again praying that you would be fine this time around. He didn’t know if he could bear an episode like the one that occurred after your pregnancy with Teddy. “Let her tell you about this though bro. I know she wanted to.” He instructed his brother because he knew that you had talked about the way you wanted to announce this to your families, especially Marcel. You wanted everyone to kind of have their own individual announcement, different from your fist pregnancy. In the following days Marcel kept his mouth shut as you began to send out customized newspapers announcing your baby. Each one including a snippet to keep it quiet till everyone knew.  Something along the lines of ‘Call us when you read the news. We can’t wait to meet our baby but until all our family and friends know… shhhh!’

“I’m fucking crying. Are you serious right now?” Winnie was balling over a Facetime after she had received hers. It naturally set you off right away.

“Yeah, going to have a little boy. I don’t know anything about them but I know he’ll be really cute.” You gushed with a giggled, starting to deep that you knew zero about little boys. It probably was a similar feeling that Trent had when you found out about Teddy. Things were going to be generally the same but also wildly different.  

“Baby, he’s just going to be like a little me. I swear interests will be fairly the same. You, food, sleep, footie. Simple boys.” Trent explained to you as he kissed your shoulder. You smiled hoping that was true but also knowing he was vastly oversimplifying things. 

“Do you have a name picked out? Are you keeping ‘TAA’ initials? Wait.. does Teddy know? What does she think?” Winnie rattled questions at you at lightning speed.

“Sheesh, Winn. Slow down please. Teddy does know. I think she’s on board but I don’t think she understands that after he arrives that he’s staying so we’ll see how that goes.” You laughed and Winnie hummed. “Names… Well, I have my opinion and T has his so I don’t know. To a degree I kind of felt like some little nod to dad would be nice.” You kept talking, explaining your current name debacle. You and Trent had talked about this at length. The only thing you had decided though was that you wanted to keep the initials ‘TAA.’ Aside from that, you and Trent just sat around throwing ‘T’ names at each other saying them all day. Trent often saying his suggestions as if it was an announcement at Anfield. 

“And number 6…” He paused his dramatics for a quick caveat. “I don’t want him to take 66 so thinking he can have half of my number.” He clarified to you and you nodded. “Trey Alexander-Arnold.’ Good, no? I kind of like it because he’d be the third ‘TAA’ kind of vibe I think.” He looked at you with a smile fairly proud of his idea. 

“So you’ll just ignore Tyler’s initials…” You cooed gently with a teasing smirk. Trent rolled his eyes wrapping his arm around your neck pulling you into his chest in a headlock. 

“You’re just so funny, huh?” He huffed, kissing your head and then releasing you. “Yes, I know. But this is also my family so he’d be the… You know what fine, scratch Trey. Now I’m not going to be able to think about anything but how salty Tyler would be. Thanks for sending me back to square one, baby.” He muttered with a huff. 

“Aww. I’m sorry, T. It was a cute name though but yeah square one, sorry. I will not listen to that argument for the rest of my life.” You cooed, caressing his cheek with your thumb. Back to square one you went, the list of names fluctuating between lengthening and shortening every couple days as you added some and ruled out others. It was all quite nice for the moment. Everyday was kind of exciting because you’d get a call from a family member or a friend who had received the news. You decided you’d hand deliver your announcement to Dianne, she deserved that. That said, Dianne aside, your only other delivery was to Marcel.

“Oh are you serious…” you whined. “You definitely already knew. I can read you like a fucking book. Who told you!” You yelped with a bit of a laugh leaning over your kitchen island slapping at Marcel. You definitely could read him like a book but it also wasn’t that hard. Lying wasn’t a strong suit in the family across the board but Marcel was particularly bad at it. His contrived reaction to your announcement confirming just that. 

“I’m sorry! Teddy told me in a backwards way and then I asked Trent but he told me you wanted to tell me so here we are. Can I know what you’re having now?” He asked with a cheeky smile that also ran in this family. 

“I still want you to find the gender with Ty. I just wanted to talk to you first. You’re important to me. You really are the best uncle to Teddy.” You began to start the conversation of why you wanted to hand deliver this news specifically to him. 

“And you’ve told Ty this, correct?” He interrupted you and you rolled your eyes subsequently. “I'm kidding, I’m kidding, go on.” He laughed not realizing how serious you were being. 

“You’re Teddy’s Celly and her best friend but in all seriousness how good you are with our kids aside. Even though this is exciting,I just wanted to talk about… me and you. Sometimes you and I get caught in banter and brother-sister type things which is fine, I love it, I just need you to know that I know what T does for me… Obviously, he and I’ve talked but Marce I also know what you’ve done for me. I wouldn’t have survived without your friendship. You are my best friend before you’re my brother, honest. You’re just really important to me and I want to make sure you and I are good because… I love you a lot.” You softly smiled at him hoping your confessional was going to be received well.

“Fuck… wow.” He choked out a little taken aback hearing your voice begin to shake a little. “I love you too. Y/N, I don’t think I ever thought you didn’t know what Trent does for you. You guys have one of the healthiest relationships I know. You value each other, I know that. You’re my best friend as well. I won’t be telling the boys that but yeah, I know.” You shook your head with a little giggle. Naturally, he wasn’t going to get soft on you without a little humor. “We’re fine. Promise. It just feels like I’ve lost him as a brother, sometimes. It’s strange that we went from messing about in L12 and now, I know I see everyone still, but it’s not just… us. Sorry it’s stupid.” You tried not to pout at him. Marcel gave you a little more than you thought he would. You were slightly worried he wouldn’t open up. 

“I’m sorry it feels that way. I can’t really totally wrap my head around his trajectory myself and what that must have felt like at home. I know how you feel though to a degree, having to share him feels wrong because he’s just our Trent and not this global figure to us but as much as we have to accept that’s kind of the way it is, you haven’t lost anyone.” You wanted to comfort him but you knew it was an abnormal situation. You just wanted to make sure he was okay. You really meant it, he was like a little brother.

“Nah, I know that as well. It’s been mad though to have all this happen and then like don’t get me wrong I love Teddy, she's goated, a pain in my ass, but she’s amazing and like I said I love you as well” He smiled prefacing his next statement. “But just on top of footie he’s just got this whole other life that I’m not in.” He puffed out some air, not happy to be admitting to his feelings. You weren’t a younger sibling but you understood and related to how bizarre it was to live in this very abnormal situation less than 1% of the world experienced. 

“Marce… You are very much so a part of this life, our life, and his life. I think you should tell him this kind of stuff because seriously, you and Ty are literally a part of every single day and if you’re not physically here bothering me, you’re in that annoying group chat that doesn’t stop. I totally empathize with this kind of grappling with growing up… I’m not saying you’re not grown, just that I know I really struggle to accept that we’re not what we were or maybe aren’t in the same place anymore, you know in our favorite places but we always find new ones. I found one with you all, no?” You smiled coming around the counter hugging him from the side, laying your head on his shoulder. 

“Yeah, course. New favorite places.” He mumbled out leaning his head onto yours. “I like our places together.” He muttered. 

“Yeah, me too. Those are the good ones. Your pain in the ass Teddy included.” You giggled, squeezing him once more before letting go. “What do you want to do for lunch before the match?” You asked, jumping back into normalcy.  

“Erm… anything really but Y/N, I am happy you know for you, and for him. I love your family and you being a part of our family, and obviously Ted.” Marcel shuffled in his chair. 

“I know. I know that.” You smiled, turning to grab your phone off the counter. After said match, the group chat lit up as it always did filling with who was coming over to your house. You needed a headcount, they never gave you for food but you always had a general idea, the usual cohort of rowdy boys in your cinema. Teddy gassed with the attention and chaos. 

“Come on, Teddy girl. You don’t want to be with all these icky boys anymore. We’re going to eat.” You cooed, coming to grab Teddy from them. She wasn’t going to eat what they were and she needed to eat her dinner at the kitchen table. You didn’t want to taunt her with whatever they were indulging in. 

“Too many, mama.” She told you, climbing off a couch next to George. He dramatically acted offended. You scooped up Teddy and kissed Trent’s head. 

“One more soon though.” Trent pipped up and you shook your head at his delivery.

“Sorry?” George looked at Trent with a confused look. It was a game of who could put together the dots the fastest. All of the boys in the room had received the newspaper announcements and said their congratulations but not until this moment, had anyone discussed your baby further.

“Shut the fuck up…” Marcel’s jaw slacked. He sat up in his chair. “Oh my days Project TAA, we get fucking project TAA. Bro!” He yelped. Thus the real chaos ensued as all the boys collectively freaked out. You gave a few hugs but you let them all pop off about Trent having a son.

“Do my boobs look bigger?” You asked Trent looking down at your chest before you looked at him. He gave you a cheeky smile. You rolled your eyes. You knew he wasn’t exactly complaining but you weren’t asking about his preference for the visuals he was getting in the bedroom, you were asking about how they looked in the top Prada had sent for you to wear to their show in Milan tonight. 

“Your boobs look amazing, baby.” Trent confirmed. They did look good. They were a bit more ‘plump’ than normal. He leaned back on his hands behind him on the mattress with a grin really enjoying how you looked. He licked over his lips.

“I can’t wear this.” You huffed unzipping the tight top. You stood there just in your sheer organza pants and satin high heels now topless. You watched Trent’s eyes light up. Your gaze flashed to his crotch unintentionally but the way he was sitting with his legs spread wide had your mouth watering. Your hormonal flares were getting the better of you. “I’m so horny for you, T.” You whined moving towards him, running your hands over his bare chest. 

“Wow, baby. I forgot this is what you being pregnant was like.” Trent smiled greedily, wrapping his arms around you pulling you to sit on his lap. His face coming close to yours. His lips ghosting over yours. 

“And I’m so sensitive now.” You moaned, pushing your lips into his for a passionate kiss. You moved his hands from your back around you and up your body, over your nipples. 

“Arrgh. We gotta go baby.” He groaned feeling your tits in his hand but trying to not let himself fall into your trap and get lost in you. 

“Come on, T, please.” You begged him. You didn’t need to beg. Trent would fuck you but you actually really did need to leave if you wanted to make it to the show on time and you still needed to put on a top despite Trent’s preference to your current state. 

“You love Prada. Let’s go sweet girl. You know I can’t say no to you so you have to get off of me.” He laughed at himself knowing the longer you stayed put on his lap with minimal clothing on the thinner and thinner his resilience was getting.    

“Fine, fine, but you owe me.” You huffed annoyed that he wouldn’t just take you right then. You were genuinely so horny for him you were praying you’d be able to make it through your night. “I’m just going to wear the sweatshirt.” You got off his lap and stood up looking around the room for the second option for a top for your look. “That still looks chic right?” You asked Trent awkwardly pulling the Prada Oversized cashmere and shearling sweatshirt over your head in an effort to not get any makeup on the cream color. 

“Nah, it looks sick baby. I like it.” Trent cooed standing up with a puff of air trying to collect himself. 

“Are you sure? I could always change.” You deviously smiled, beginning to peel the sweatshirt off again.

“I’m fuming right now that I’m saying this but can you please keep your clothes on f’me.” He gave you a massive smile and a disapproving head shake as he laughed pulling the fabric back down. This was a couple months ago and your horniness for Trent and your larger tits had not changed. Despite the World Cup being some amount of time away you found yourself in a similar situation trying on clothes, asking for his opinions but back home in your bedroom. Trent was in bed, he deemed your late night activity unnecessary but still entertained you. You were digging through your entire wardrobe trying to find just the right top. To no avail, you came out in a defeated huff. Trent smiled seeing you act so childish over something trivial. 

“C’mere baby. You’ll look great regardless. Just come to bed. It’s really not that big of a deal.” He tried to reason with you but it was a big deal… to you. Pulling together looks for a big tournament where you were playing a secondary role was insane but you did it nonetheless because well, you liked dressing up. Doing this insanity while pregnant? Not nearly as fun. 

“Nothing, and I’m actually serious, nothing looks good.” You complained, crawling on your bed towards him. You laid next to him and let him pull your tired body into his. He turned your chin to look up at him and kissed your lips. You hummed returning his kiss. “I’ve missed you.” You whined, pulling away from the kiss momentarily. 

“I’ve missed you more. Promise.”  He pecked your lips again as he tightened his arms around you. You hadn’t actually been apart long enough, only an away game, to warrant any sane person to say they missed one another but you two? You really did. The way his warm body felt against yours felt like heaven. His familiar comforting yet equally sexy scent encased you. His arms felt firm like he’d never let go and you didn’t want him to ever. His breath slowed as he looked deep into your eyes. You felt a shiver run up your spine staring back at him. “Turn around, baby.” He whispered close to you, turning your body in his arms letting your back now press into his chest. He leaned his head down and began kissing behind your ear. Your brain couldn’t really even process anything, you just felt this sense of relief and comfort being held by him in addition to this primal urge to get him to fuck you. You didn’t say anything. You let him work kisses down your neck as you pushed your ass against his hardening cock. “You want me to make you feel good?” He hummed as you let his hands roam over you, peeling your clothes off slowly. He relished in the sight of your now naked body against his. You tried to roll your hips back into him needing more. 

“T, fuck me, please.” You begged him desperately. His lips pulled into a teasing smile against your skin. It wasn’t long before he was sliding his length inside you. His hands all over you.

“You want me to fuck you? Show me how bad you want it then, baby.” He whispered against your neck. He steadied his hips behind you and let you move against him. You pushed further against him, taking more and more of his length inside of you. You were wet enough that his cock slid in without a struggle. Needy as ever you bounced your hips on your own, fucking yourself. “That’s right, baby. Good girl.” He smiled, enjoying your desperation. “Use me however you like to. Go on.” He groaned. 

“Please. T, baby. I need you.” You whined and he caved, giving into your pleas. You tipped your head back and Trent took advantage of the space returning his lips to your neck. He nibbled on your sensitive skin, scraping his teeth against you, marking you in the millionth way that you were his. You felt the knot in your stomach grow tighter as one of Trent’s hands slid to massage your tits cheekily pulling on your nipples. His other hand slid down in front of you coming to play with your clit and began to circle harshly around it. You couldn’t stay quiet as your orgasm got closer and closer. You clenched your pussy tighter around him. He moaned your name, unable to think about anything but you and how good you felt, the pleasure consumed all his thoughts.You shut your eyes as you awkwardly turned your head to kiss his lips. 

“Cum on my cock, baby. Be a good girl and cum f’me.” He sweetly whispered in your ear in contrast to his crass words. The pleasure started to be too much to control. Your pussy clenched tight around him as your body was filled with white hot pleasure. Your warm, wet, and tight walls were becoming too much for Trent to manage. “Can you do that for me, baby? Huh?” His thrusts were mind-numbingly perfect. Your eyes were shut tight but you nodded eagerly for him. Trent held you so tightly, completely flush against him. His pace had become relentless, his hips unforgiving as he moved, driving his cock in and out of you, consistently hitting a spot so deep inside you. Swiftly he was twitching and fucking you full of his cum.

“Fuck T…” you whined feeling his thrusts continue but slow. He emptied himself with slow lazy pumps. He didn't stop though as he came. He kept fucking you at a slower pace though as he watched his release seem from your pussy fucking it back into you untill you came once more for him.

“I love you so much, baby.” He hummed kissing your shoulder. He cuddled up to you keeping his strong arms wrapped around your frame. 

“I love you, T.” You sleepily cuddled back into him. He kissed the back of your head and pulled you closer into him.  You fell asleep just like that in the most loving embrace possible.

There was a World Cup friendly ahead of this summer’s tournament. In an unexpected turn of events the once very exciting information that the World Cup was going to be held in the United States was now one of inconvenience. By the end of the tournament you’d be a month or so out from your due date and you weren’t sure if you’d be able to fly risking the possibility of attending a potential final, should England make it that far in the tournament. You needed to have your baby in England. You could’ve tried to make arrangements to work around staying in New York for the birth but it didn’t make sense, at least not to you.

“I’m not even listening to them.” Lauren laughed keeping her eyes fixed on Trent and Jude filming a relaxed interview together for the England Youtube page. “Just want to sit on his lap, you know?” She cooed to you with a devious smirk, eyes staying put. 

“Laurennn…” You reprimanded her even though you knew Teddy wouldn’t have picked up on her innuendo. “Can you see dada, hmm?” You squeezed Teddy to you as she sat in your lap. You were sitting crossed legged on a turf pitch with your cheek pressed to the side of hers.  It was fairly hot and not an easy position for you to get in and out of but it’s where you currently were. Teddy nodded following your finger pointing to a monitor relaying the video of them as it was being filmed. “Fine, they look good to be fair.” You quipped to Lauren with a smug smile agreeing with her sentiment of wanting to sit on your respective man's laps as you watched Trent adjust in his seat raising his hips upwards. 

“What dada talking bout?” Teddy turned and asked you before letting her head fall back onto your chest lazily.  

“Footie.” You told her. Frankly, you hadn’t really been listening but you assumed that’s what they were on about.  She gave you a sort of blank ‘oh…’ in response that made you smile. “ What? You’re not interested in footie?” You asked her just interested in what was going on in her little brain before Trent and Jude broke out into a big laugh about god knows what. You couldn’t really hear their conversation because of their distance from you but the sound carried. They were yapping and laughing away as usual regardless. 

“Want to laugh with dada and Judey too, mama.” Teddy complained hearing and seeing their laughter. She was jealous. They looked like they were having so much fun and yet they weren’t including her. The ultimate offense. Your eyes were fixed on the monitor but Teddy was trying to see how far away she really was from where they were sitting to see if she could get there. 

“When they’re done, okays?” You cooed gently with a kiss to her hair. You gave her a cuddle and she sighed dramatically letting her body limply fall sideways on to Lauren’s lap as well. She was definitely inheriting some of Trent’s dramatics. 

“What? You’re just too cool to be with us now? You’re not having fun so you want to go be with the boys instead?” Lauren teased tickling Teddy’s tummy eliciting a giggly squirm before she pulled her entirely into her lap. “Wait, Ted. No, no, no!” Lauren hushly but sternly tried to call out as Teddy broke away from her in childish defiance running towards Jude and Trent. She even had the cheek to turn her head back to look at Lauren with a conniving smile as she did it. It was a jarringly similar grin to Trent’s that made you shake your head. 

“Think we’ve got an intruder, lads.” Jude announced, watching Teddy clumsily step over wires and cords around where they were filming. Lauren stood up and attempted to chase after her but the crew had welcomed her in before she could nab her. Jude laughed seeing Lauren’s face grappling between slight panic and a sly grin thinking this was a little funny. You were stuck as is because no shot you were going to be able to stand up on your own from your seat on the grass in time and you certainly weren’t going to run. 

“Oh, sorry.” Trent smiled, turning to see his little girl. “Are we able to cut for a second? This isn’t live, right?” Trent asked, really trying to remember if they said this was going to be streamed or something. They told him he was fine so he stuck out his arms to reach out for Teddy who was currently trying her best to navigate as carefully as she could through the cameras. “Sorry.” Trent apologized once more before grunting, picking up Teddy and lifting her over some equipment. “C’mere Ted. What are you doing, silly girl?” He asked her. She just shrugged with a giggle. 

“Did you get bored with mummy and Lauren? We do too.” Jude asked her teasingly with a wink to you and Lauren who was now just opting to sit back down. You couldn’t hear his question but you heard your respective names and rolled your eyes in sync. 

“Want to play a game with us?” Josh, the host of their interview, asked Teddy. Her eyes lit at the question. A game with daddy and Judey, absolutely… well and also with this stranger. Josh looked to Trent for his approval to include Teddy in a small game but very quickly he then turned to you for your opinion. You didn’t really know the context so you implied it’d be up to his discretion. “Come here sweetheart. Want to play a game with Jude and your daddy?” Teddy shyly hid behind Trent’s legs. 

“You’re okay, baby. Want to play or no, hmm?” Trent cooed, pulling one of Teddy’s curls straight and then letting it bounce back. She sheepishly nodded. He nodded his head towards Josh for her to go over. Teddy looked back towards you and you smiled and waved reassuring her despite not having really any idea what was happening. “Go on, yeah? We’ll have fun!” Trent reassured her. You knew she was fine as long as Trent was with her. Josh explained a game the crew made up on the spot. The boys would each have a guess and write what they thought the answer Teddy would give to a question on a white board. 

“Alright, so we’ve got Teddy Alexander-Arnold with us for our next little segment. Mum’s given us a go ahead?” Josh spoke to the camera and looked to Trent for confirmation. He nodded as Josh rattled on a further explanation of the instructions before they began.  “What do daddy and Jude do for work?” Josh asked, looking down at Teddy who had plopped herself onto the turf picking at it with her hands. She tilted her head up to give her answer when he gave her the go ahead. 

“Play.” Teddy responded nonchalantly and fairly disinterested before flicking her gaze back to the grass. Josh laughed a little at her answer. Trent wasn’t phased by her attention. He turned his board around to show the correct answer with a smug smile. 

“Nah, not having that.” Jude snapped annoyed. He leaned closer to Teddy. “Ted, but what do we play? You’re not saying footie? Also, I don’t know why I’m slightly offended by your answer.” Jude started to laugh at Teddy's belittlement of their careers teasing her reaching over to poke at her pudgy tummy.

“Yeah huh, Judey. Play footie with my daddy.” Teddy clarified with a giggle wiggling away from him. Jude had written ‘Footie’ on his board. 

“Hey, hey, hey. Can’t be trying to coerce her into an answer. She said ‘play’ not ‘footie’ you lost the point. Me and my baby bear just vibe different, mate.” Trent quipped back. Josh laughed a little at the back and forth. Trent leaned off his seat and kissed Teddy’s hair.  

“Alright, alright. One nil to Trent. Another question for you, sweetheart. What team do you think will win the World Cup?” Josh asked the next question and gave the boys a minute to write their answers. 

“Libpool.” Teddy answered with a bit more of a yelp and giggle, very certain and proud of her answer. Both boys turned their boards around begrudgingly with incorrect answers throwing their heads with a groan. Teddy looked at Trent confused and a little disheartened with their reaction.     

“Baby… Yeah, that’s a good answer but what team do Jude and I play together on. Where do we live?” Trent tried to clarify for her. As much as Trent was amazing if not perfect with Teddy he could never quite drop his competitiveness, he wanted to win. 

“Libpool, dada.” Teddy doubled down. Trent ran his hands over his face. Josh laughed. 

“Teddy girl.” Jude shook his head with a goofy smile. “I don’t play in Liverpool. You know I don’t live near you. We have to talk on the phone usually, don’t we?” He gently explained trying to direct her to the correct answer.

“This isn’t really fair though is it though because her answer is wrong.” Trent quipped trying to rationalize why the game wasn’t going to work. Teddy tried to complain, not really appreciating the fact that Trent was talking about her like she wasn’t there. 

“Mate, the game is guessing her answer though.” Jude snapped, interrupting Teddy. She stood up and grabbed his arm. 

“Judey! Listen!” All three boys laughed seeing Teddy come out of her shell a little more as she got more comfortable. “Live in England, tay? My mama not from there though but dada said can’t laugh at her.” Teddy segued into the unrelated topic about you. It was a discussion that came up recently with her of why you sounded different. You american accented words versus Trent’s made her laugh. 

“Right, we won’t make fun of mummy, alright?” Jude told Teddy and she nodded. “But you’re English still and that’s who you’re supposed to say is going to win, Teddy girl.” He explained to her as she pulled herself up to sit in Jude’s lap.They carried on with more questions and banter. It was a little while later on when she started to get tired. She wasn’t even involved in the video at this point. She just was chilling. You were gossiping away to Lauren who wasn’t really listening as much as she was just watching Jude be sweet with your little girl. Teddy started to get worked up in Jude’s arms though beginning to progressively get more fussy as she got more tired. 

“Uh oh! Want to just go be with daddy?” Jude cooed gently as Teddy began to start crying. She nodded sadly with a hushed ‘pleabs.” He kissed her before passing her to Trent’s outstretched arms. 

“Not having that?” Josh asked Jude with some cheek as Teddy continued to cry. 

“Nah, that’s why I love Ted. I just hand her off when she gets upset.” Jude laughed as Trent rolled her eyes as he whispered asking Teddy what was wrong. ”To be fair, she’s so chill more often than not. My only beef is that she won’t wear my Madrid jersey but I think that’s more of an issue I’m taking up with him.” Jude laughed with a smirk.

“Aw, baby C’mon. Going to be okay. Let’s go sit with mama, okay?” Trent cooed, kissing Teddy holding her as she cried ‘mama’ on repeat. “Can I just pop over to my wife quick?” Trent asked in the general direction of the men behind the cameras as he was already standing up. He knew that no one wanted to hear Teddy wailing before even asking. The director nodded. 

“Oh, is mummy asleep on daddy.”  Lauren giggled, bouncing Teddy on her hip walking back into your living room holding a glass of wine in her other hand noticing you. You’d passed out laying on Trent. She had come to stay for a little to spend some time with you and to help out with the nursery you desperately needed to finish.

“Uh huh… my mama lub my dada so um they um have baby.” Teddy explained squirming in her arms to put her down. Lauren bent over and placed her on the carpet. Teddy immediately took off running to the couch jumping on Marcel who had come over. 

“Yeah mummy has a baby. You must be sleepy like mummy though, no?” Lauren cooed carefully sitting herself on the white couch keeping her glass of wine steady. 

“Nos.” She giggled despite it actually getting close to her bedtime.

“I think you are…” Lauren cooed, pulling on one of her legs hanging over Marel’s lap. “Have to set a good example for your baby brother. Don’t want him to be like Celly do you?” Lauren teased.  

“The stray was so unnecessary.” Marcel quipped with an eye roll.   

“I like Celly, Lauwen. No bruber though. No tanks al zander arnol girls only.” Teddy explained through stumbling words, sitting upright hugging Marcel. 

“Yeah, you’ll still be Alexander-Arnold girls. Why don't you want a baby brother though? If you had a sister you'd have to share all your cute clothes like mummy has to with Winnie.” Lauren laughed.  

“Shares a generous word.” You slowly and groggily spoke coming out of sleep.

“Mummyyy!” Teddy squealed hearing you, crawling off Marcel towards you and Trent on the couch. 

“Hi baby. You’re so cute and so loud.” You laughed watching her make her way to you. “Come here, yeah?” You cooed bringing her into you and Trent.  

The following weeks were a bit hectic with the World Cup fast approaching. Trent was so busy and you just the same so it was fairly common that someone from your family helped out with Teddy. Frankly, you really needed to accept the fact that you might need a babysitter eventually because this was getting even more overwhelming as your due date came closer as well. Marcel had just begun dating this girl Gracie. Maybe ‘begun’ wouldn’t be the word considering you met her years ago and they had a whole situationship before this current relationship. She was sweet and you liked her. Cute, fairly meek, not in a negative way but she definitely was trying to “fit in” with your family so she wasn’t the most outspoken at the moment. It was a lot for you to walk into but for her it was a little different and slightly more strange. She’d actually known the Alexander-Arnold family longer than you did but since Trent was so successful and famous now it was almost an entirely new environment. That said, she definitely just wanted to be liked by all the people that felt like permanent stays like you… and Teddy. 

“Excuse me, my Celly.” Teddy reprimanded Gracie, moving her hand off of Marcel. She was attempting to make it clear that Marcel was hers as you all sat at a restaurant for lunch on a random day. Having someone with you and Teddy all day made such a difference so you took the liberties of going out for something fun and leisurely when you did.

“Okay, I’m sorry sweetheart.” Gracie gently apologized, running her hand over her hair. Teddy didn’t concede though. She just kept her unimpressed glare on her. Marcel laughed a little at Teddy’s upset and Gracie’s kindness. 

“This is my Celly. Tay?” Teddy yelled. Your eyes widened. You knew she was possessive of Trent and you but this was really the first outburst about someone else. It wasn’t all that surprising though that the someone else was Marcel though. 

“Teddy girl…” You cautioned her. That's really all it took. It was a tone she knew well. “Can we be polite please? That’s not very nice.” You asked her. You mouthed a ‘sorry’ to Gracie. You wanted to really tell her that jealousy was not the way to get a man. She frowned at you and then her face pulled into offense as she watched the biggest betrayal, Marcel wrapping his arm around Gracie.

“It’s okay, really.” Gracie assured you brushing off Teddy’s sass. You smiled and so did she.  “We can share him, yeah?” She gave a toothy smile to Teddy before pecking Marcel’s cheek. That was the straw that broke the camel’s back  

“Nooooo mine!” She yelled and you immediately looked at her with wide eyes and a shake of the head. You were fast approaching the delightful stage of toddler tantrums. Teddy was really well behaved but sometimes she just didn’t know any better way to communicate her feelings. She sat in her chair as her eyes welled with tears, upset with Marcel and Gracie and now upset she had done something wrong. 

“Oh my little teddy bear.” Marcel pouted at her. “Come here. You’re still my best friend, hmm?” He leaned over and tried to pick her up but her tears began to fall as she rejected him. 

“You’re okay, baby. Celly loves you, promise. Come sit with me. I got you.” You grabbed her out of her seat knowing she wouldn’t say no to you. She wrapped herself around your neck and sniffled. “You didn’t eat any of your chips, my cute girl. You love them. Want to eat some with mummy?” You cooed and she shook her head ‘no’ but she contradicted herself when she eventually turned back to the table to grab one of your plate. 

“I have?” Teddy asked Gracie sheepishly, reaching a chip towards her plate close to yours that had a bit of ketchup on it. 

“Of course, Teddy. I'll share with you” Gracie smiled and pushed her plate and thus the ketchup a little closer to her. She shoved her chip into the ketchup and then into her mouth with a greedy smile and a hum. You and Marcel exchanged eye rolls at her. She was very cute and always managed to get her way. 

“I’m fucking worried 25 hours a day.” You cried over the phone. You couldn’t even Facetime. You couldn’t bear to look at Trent right now. The World Cup did not end how you would’ve wanted it to but nevertheless Trent and Jude and a few other England teammates had stayed out in California for some time off. You had flown back immediately after the team was knocked out. You were so close to your due date you didn’t want to leave anything to chance, have any complications or be told you couldn't fly home after their departure in the Semifinals so you and Teddy were back home alone sans Trent.

“Baby… come on.” Trent groaned tired from his night out. “Just don’t deep it please.” It was like he forgot who he was talking to. Like the difference in your time zones wasn’t the only thing disconnecting you two. Trent rolled in the massive bed he was staying in really wishing you were in right now. He sighed, rubbing his hands over his face, disgruntled, not even sure how he had just got home. He was very drunk. It was maybe three or almost four am for Trent and late morning for you back home. It wasn’t how you anticipated your day starting and suddenly you felt the tides of your afternoon changing. 

“I mean who was there? Are there photos? Like why are you telling me this?” You rattled quickly in a panic after Trent had sort of unintentionally but intentionally filled you in on his night. They had gone to a club. Not your favorite thing in the world but you knew he was going out. What you were unaware of was that they were joined by… let’s just say a man who was a “promoter”  out in LA but that title really didn’t encapsulate what he did for a living. You knew nightlife. You knew it well in fact and you knew of this man and you knew that the England players request to blow off steam wasn’t just coming with bottles it was coming with bottle girls. 

“I don’t knowww. I just don’t want you to be caught out if someone says something shitty on twitter, alright beautiful?” Trent whined, throwing his head back into a pillow. You could hear other people in the house with him. He clearly was alone in his room or if someone was there they were dead quiet but you knew there were other people there.

“Well, why would they have something to say? What was happening?” You asked, feeling a bit nauseous and you weren’t sure if it was a symptom of your pregnancy or the vagueness of Trent’s borderline black out drunk phone call. 

“Nah, nothing baby. Wish you were here with me, you know.” He segued into another conversation entirely. You didn’t know if he intended to do this or if he was just drunk enough to not remember what he was talking about. He poorly attempted to convince you to have phone sex with him. You usually wouldn’t be opposed but like this? No. He was wasted, it was almost the afternoon for you, there was this weird tension and secrecy about what his night actually consisted of was putting you off. 

“Okay, can you just go to sleep for me, T and get some water before, please.” You tried to calm yourself down just thinking more about his well being and the pain in the ass he'd be when he’d inevitably call you complaining he didn’t feel well wanting you to baby him when he woke up after this. You tried to say goodnight but you definitely didn’t miss the female voices echoing in the house and one in particular calling his name. He knew. He knew you heard it as well. He was too drunk to process how to handle this appropriately. Another woman's voice calling his name close to four in the morning wasn’t a great look for him and it wasn’t a great feeling for you. For some reason it really bothered you that it was an American accent. He couldn’t think quickly enough to act or say anything before you had hung up. You must’ve hit decline 50 times after that. His vision blurred. Trent didn’t leave his room that night, he slept alone.  

“You know why I’m here.” Tyler gently spoke to you standing at your front door. You had waited for this all day after you’d seen the predicted photos emerge on football gossip sites alike. You didn’t want to see them but people would just DM them to you unprovoked. It was so invasive and so… sad. You did not want to see the thread putting together that the interior of the house from this LA model’s Instagram story was the same one in the photo Jude had shared. You didn’t want to see the screenshot of another stranger's story they posted unintentionally capturing a woman standing in between Trent’s legs at the club and you most certainly did not want to see the photo where you could not make out where his hands had disappeared to.

“Yeah, sure. On cue, no?” You snapped a little unfairly at Tyler as you let him inside. You rolled your eyes not really even greeting him. You knew Trent had sent Tyler over that night. You didn’t know what time it was on the west coast, you could’ve looked but you were ignoring Trent. You were raging. 

“You know it’s just misinformation nothing happened.” Tyler tried to reassure you that the photos were just nonsense but frankly this had happened one too many times. It wasn’t like you really had the image that Trent could actually go through with having sex with someone else but you just didn’t like that he was even entertaining another woman. It made you sick because you’d imagine he’d be comparing her to you.  

“No, I’m tired of ‘nothing happened,’ ‘it’s just a photo,’ ‘it looks worse than it was.’ It isn’t always about international footballer Trent Alexander Arnold’s image… Do you know what a fucking mug I look like? Sitting at home with his daughter and pregnant with his son? Why is he even entertaining it… why is he there to begin with?” You really lost it. You couldn’t hold it together anymore. Tears started to fill your lash line but you wiped them away with a tired gruff. You knew this was your brother in law but this was also Tyler’s job. 

“Y/N…” Tyler cautioned you trying to not let you get too worked up but the ball was already rolling. You couldn’t stop the crying. 

“No, I’m fucking sick of this. I can’t handle this” You sobbed. You gripped the kitchen counter top before just slamming your phone onto it and leaving the room. Tyler sighed letting you go, he knew you deserved to be mad. He wasn’t going to fight you on it but he was concerned by what you meant by your ability to ‘handle’ this. The thing that really sucked about being mad at Trent in these situations was that you would never keep him from Teddy. It was a little annoying that there had been multiple of these as well but you weren’t going to let his indiscretions or your anger towards him take away from her relationship with him. That said… you didn’t want to be there so you made Tyler call him with her before she went to bed.  

“Baby, where’s mummy?” Trent asked Teddy as he Facetimed Tyler who held her sitting on a stool at your kitchen island.  

“Um.. mama’s sad, dada. Sad in beddy, thinks.” Teddy babbled unknowingly, kind of spilling the fact that you’d really been upset over this. He knew that but knowing Teddy was conscious of it broke his heart all the more. Tyler’s eyes widened not realizing Teddy had even picked up on that.  “Why mama sad?” Teddy asked innocently.

“Mummy is tired.” Trent sighed. “Can you give her a big kiss from me?” Trent cooed kind of wishing he could just give you one himself.  

“Mate, you gotta get home now. This one was out of order.”  Tyler put Teddy down and readjusted in his seat. “She’s tired of your shit.” He quipped at Trent. 

“Ty, I didn’t do anything!” Trent yelped defending his innocence. 

“Bro, I’m not questioning that but they’re dragging her online, they’re dragging you. It’s a mess and you need to take care of your wife and your daughter. I’m worried about Y/N.” Tyler replied in a serious tone. “You lost and it was a shitty way to go out of the tournament but this was dumb. Get your ass home. You’re not 19 bro.” Tyler really drove home his point that Trent needed to leave asap. Tyler always had a delivery that made Trent shutter. He would never not make Trent feel young and naive. 

“Please come here, okay?” Trent trailed behind you in your bedroom when he returned to England days before he had anticipated. He listened to Tyler and left that night, returning the next morning for home. 

“T… I’m upset. Let me be upset. You can’t just make me change my mind to make you feel better.” You snapped turning around to look at him frustratingly. The only words you’d heard for the past couple hours were ‘I’m sorry’ and you weren’t all that convinced by them. 

“It’s not about me. It’s about our relationship. I’m sorry.” Trent frowned at you. He genuinely was apologetic, you knew that but it was almost agitating you more because he knew he had put himself in a stupid situation knowingly. It also was agitating you that you felt like you wanted to disappear realizing you were about to have a new born baby and embark on another fresh hell of your postpartum body again. You didn’t want to think about him with other women ever and certainly not right now given how you felt you looked.

“It is about you because who looks bad? I do and you're unphased. I’m upset Trent. It’s fine, okay? I let you do what you need to do. I get it you’re a ‘baller’ or whatever and you guys all love showing this sort of lifestyle.” Trent wanted to interrupt you and correct you. That wasn’t true. Trent didn’t really push that narrative but it just backed your point up a little better if he had. “But you know where I am… you know that I am carrying your fucking baby right now and your calling me what? While some girl is in the fucking house? Why is someone calling your name at 3:56 am? Tell me.” You tore into him remembering the exact time you’d hung up on him. “Why is there another American girl calling your name? Tell me about your night with her… Did you call me after… Did you call me because you felt guilty?” You started crying, gasping for breaths unable to control it.   

“That’s not fair. You know that’s not true or what happened here.” Trent pleaded for some sort of mercy but he knew he fucked up. You hadn't necessarily accused him of cheating, it was sort of hinted at but that wasn’t the point. You were upset about how shitty seeing his hands near another woman was making you feel about yourself.

“Fair! You want to talk about fair!?” You yelled between sobs. You stuck your hand out to distance him from coming any closer to you when he tried.

“Y/N… I’m sorry. God, I’m such a fucking idiot. I was just trying to be chilled and relax with the boys. I didn’t want to make a big deal because I was getting chirped for being such a dad.” He woefully tried to explain, unknowingly digging his hole a bit deeper.  

“Hey, hmm maybe because you are a dad.” You sarcastically rolled your eyes. “But you’re right… teammates over us always. Got it. Made that one proper clear.” You continue to sort of take digs at him for things that maybe weren’t the most accurate, and definitely a little too harsh  maybe. You didn’t feel that way but your insecurity about the photos and that familiar valley girl accent was haunting you. 

‘Hey, baby… the attitude isn’t necessary. I'm trying to apologize.” He looked at you both with a stern face not appreciating the jab knowing you two had to get through this but also absolutely terrified he’d upset you like this. 

“Well you shouldn’t have to apologize, you shouldn’t be doing this shit. You’re married, you are a father of two babies by the way. So, tell me about her? What’s her name?” You snapped as your emotions continued to run high. 

“I know! I know! And I fucked up. I don’t remember anyone they invited names, baby. Honest.” Trent once again took a misstep. Honestly, he was never great in arguments. You were. Your tactics weren’t the most fair but they were poignant.

“Oh, that’s brilliant you did all this for women you can’t even remember their names. Be honest and don’t fucking lie to me… did you touch her?” You made yourself feel sick asking him as you reimagined the blurred images. 

“Baby…” He didn’t want to talk about this. Tyler was right Trent was not 19 and this was not some silly cheating scandal. Trent probably shouldn’t have been in that position but he would never cheat on you. You knew that and he knew that you did. It had nothing to do with him, it was more about the ‘woman.’ You were playing that angle though because it was easier to rationalize but both you and Trent knew that this anger and this conversation was stemming from your insecurities. 

“Did they touch you?” You pushed for him to answer you. “Tell me. Did you get tired of the fact that while I carry your child for 9 months I don’t look like some Insta baddie worthy of a post World Cup party?” It was a big unfair blow. Trent felt like you punched him in the stomach. He shut his eyes, swallowing his need to defend himself and his pride. 

“No, absolutely not…” He whispered, throwing his head trying to refrain. 

“Did you touch her?” You asked him and he paused for a bit longer than you would’ve liked. “Oh my god… fuck you. Honestly.” You cried falling into more sobs as you sat on your bed dropping your head into your hands.

“Y/N, let me at least fucking answer. No… Fine, a woman tried and I told her to get away from me. That's what the photo is. I was moving her off me, alright?” He explained.  It should’ve made you feel better but it didn’t. It wasn’t enough to shake the idea that your body currently couldn’t compete with some LA model’s.

“Why T… Why would you? Fuck… Am I not enough, you needed to seek out more? You want me to be this confident strong woman for Teddy and it’s things like this that just rip me apart. My husband, her father had other women practically in his lap… and I’m… I’m just. I can’t manage it.” You’d gotten to a place where you would always remember the pain and trouble you endured mentally from your damaged self image.You could forgive yourself, but you’d never forget all the insecurity and hatred and right now Trent’s night in LA had you remembering every piece of your past. You’d healed a lot. It was one of those situations where you had a hard time accepting your own treatment of yourself and the only person you could fault was yourself. Trent said no. It wasn’t even a competition for Trent. He’d pick you everytime but you were taking this out on him.

“You… you are more than enough. I never want anything but you. I'm so sorry I made a mistake even going but I definitely didn’t make a mistake getting myself out of there. I called you in my room, alone because I missed you, baby. It was a lapse in judgment. I’m a fucking idiot putting the most important thing in my life at risk for my ego to be cool for them.” He cooed sitting down next to you. You caught yourself sat on the bed now beside him in the mirror. It was the perfect storm. Emotions high, Trent’s error, pregnancy kicking your ass. You didn’t recognize yourself. You saw a woman who was overweight you’d never met. The problem was that you were underweight and no one could convince you otherwise. It was obsession and all you could think about as Trent yapped a heartfelt apology was that her arms, that women standing in between your husbands legs was that her arms looked thinner than yours, her collarbones raised a bit more. You weren’t sure if you really were upset about their positioning or her presenting the idea of a more attractive option to Trent. 

“T… I worry every time you leave. I really do trust you… I do but it’s like sickening sometimes knowing the temptation that is literally thrown in your lap.” You had been on a relentless and unattainable pursuit of visual perfection and that fear and distortion you hid in and it came storming back. 

“There is no temptation. There is no one that is you. No one could ever be you. Nothing could fill the void you’d leave behind if I didn’t have you. You are my world. I would crumble without you.” He began to cry.  “I’m so sorry.” He leaned his head on your shoulder attempting to take a deep breath. Trent hated arguments. He hated confrontation, and he hated that sometimes he felt like he couldn’t win against your disordered way of thinking. 

“It’s fine, T…” you whispered consoling him, cupping his cheek. You’d made progress with your health but it definitely felt like you’d revert back to old ways of thinking the second some sort of comparison was thrown at you and that’s exactly what this was. 

“It’s not, baby. I love you. God, I fucking love you.” Trent whimpered trying to reel in his own emotions. He kissed your shoulder and it made you take a deep breath. 

“I love you.” you whispered again. The words were tiny and fragile. Trent pouted seeing your tear stained face. His pout turned into a soft frown when he looked up at you. You both sat there in and out of tears. Trent was a light that gave you a strength you weren’t sure you even wanted to have sometimes. He gave you a happiness that you weren’t sure was even humanly possible and you hated that you questioned your worth despite not only the love he gave you but the belief and support. “Please, don’t stop loving me.” You barely were able to mutter out. Trent let out a defeated breath and pulled you into a hug. “I don’t think I can do it without you. Sometimes I think that this unconditional love I have for you makes me feel more insecure because I just want you to be happy and if that’s what someone else does for you. I’d let it happen” You shamefully admitted.

“Stop, baby. Never could someone make me as happy as you. I need to be better but.. You also have to be better for me. It kills me when you think like this.” Trent sighed. “I need you to know that that’s insane. I’d be insane to want anything else but you. I’m so sorry, baby. I never want to lose you.”  You could tell he was about to rant. 

“Please just shhh, baby. I don’t need an apology from you right now. I just need you.” You explained calmly and honestly just needing your husband, your Trent to hold you and so he did. You stayed quiet for a long time after that, moving to lay on your bed. 

“T… Is it okay if we don’t have sex tonight?” You sheepishly asked. You weren’t sure why you were asking. He never pressured you. You just weren’t sure you’d be able to stomach it still kind of fixated on your own insecurities. 

“What? Yeah, course. You haven’t been doing it lately because of me right? You’ve done it because you wanted to, yeah? Baby, whatever you want, I’ll do.” Trent cooed, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“No no, I’ve been fine. I just… I just want to be with my best friend tonight. I’m just a little tired and still a little sad.” You told him, hiding your face in the nape of his neck.  

“I’m right here, baby. Never ever leaving you. Won’t ever leave. I never want to hurt you and I’m sorry I did. I love you so much.” Trent cooed, pulling you into a tight embrace. He rested his chin on top of your head. 

“You can’t imagine how much I love you.” You spoke. Your voice muffled by your proximity to his skin.  

“I think I can…” He smiled, pressing a kiss to your hair. You were quiet for a moment before he pulled your face off him and held your face in his hands. “Baby?”  He cooed. You sympathetically smiled at him, still a little sad. “I don’t want you to be anyone but yourself for Teddy. If she’s anything like you when she’s older she’ll be perfect to me. Even now, when I see glimpses of you in her. It’s everything to me. That’s all I want and when I think about our little boy and Teddy the most important thing is that they know how much I love you. I just want them to not just hear me say it or see it, I want them to be able to see and feel how much I love their mum, how much I respect you and believe in you, how beautiful you are, how amazing you are and I want them to know that. We are so so lucky to have you, baby.”  You smiled and a few tears escaped. He wiped them off your smooth skin. “Tell me something.” He sat up. “Can you do me a favor?” He smiled back at you. Your brow furrowed a little surprised given the circumstances. You were about to be having a month full of gifts and you were sure about that. Post fight? Yeah. Before leaving for preseason? Surely. Push presents? Definitely. You doing something for him? Questionable. “Tell me what you think I love about you.” You shook your head in defiance. “Yeah, go on.” He nodded at you.  

“T, I don’t know!” You whined with a pout not wanting to do this. 

“Well, what do I tell you I like.” He smiled, leaning over kissing your shoulder.  

“I don’t know… my ass.” You sheepishly threw out one. He hummed and nodded for you to continue. “This is stupid.” You muttered but he gestured for you to keep talking. “My tits.” He nodded with confirmation. “My lips.” He hummed again with assurance. “My toes.” You laughed and he laughed with you knowing he recently commented that he liked your white pedicure. You were grasping at straws for ideas.  It wasn’t that Trent didn’t tell you things he liked, in fact just the opposite. 

“You’re sort of right. But baby, you could literally name any part.  I love every fucking inch of you inside and out. Your missing volumes of things I love about you. You know me, I don’t fucking like to lose and I’m not loosing this. I’m going to get you to love you the way I love you.” He wiped his thumb over your lips with a glint in his eyes. “I wish you could just see the way we see you. Be brave for me right now. Tell me what you thought when I was in LA. Like mouth off, baby. You need to learn to back yourself. Give me a ‘you’re a fucking idiot because I’m sexy.’” He gave you a cheeky smile knowing this was something you wouldn’t want to do but hoping you’d do it for him. You thought for a moment and smiled. 

“You couldn’t have created a prettier baby with anyone else.” You smiled back at him. He squinted at you. It was a little bit of a passive one. You really we’re complementing both Teddy and him in the process. 

“I’ll take it butt I was looking for more of a ‘I’m the lengest girl you’ve ever seen, you’re lucky I gave you a chance.’” He laughed and you rolled your eyes. “I want to hear one of these everyday. Remind me and yourself everyday that you’re it baby.” He kissed you a few times. 

“Thank you for loving all of my imperfections.” You smiled into the kiss. 

“They are not imperfections, they are what makes you everything you are and everything I’m madly in love with.” He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you tight into him. He swayed you back and forth with a hum and a few kisses. “The fact that I get to just be in your presence. Get to experience you in my life and be a part of yours, it’s the biggest blessing. I have never seen a more beautiful person inside and out, baby. Please don’t ever forget that. You’re incredible.” He kissed you a couple more times. You muttered out a ‘thank you.’ “Do you believe me?” He brushed his nose against yours. 

“I think I am starting to. I like… life with you. Our life. I feel like I used to dread the lulls and now it’s like there could never be enough time in this life with you or my babies. I just crave more of it all. You made me like to live” You giggled a little. “Sorry, I know that sounds dramatic.” You shyly smiled.  

“Good.” He kissed once more, sealing how much he loved you. Things would always be hard but progress was being made slowly and you think that’s what made you so upset. It felt like you took a few steps backwards when Trent went to LA but as he held you, you knew things were better than they’d actually ever been. You believed what he was telling you. 

“Want to go see mama and dada, Celly.” Teddy huffed, kicking her dangling legs back and forth off a chair in a hospital waiting room. You had gone into labor hours ago. Teddy wasn’t even there the whole time but she was getting restless. 

“Nah, you don’t. You want to hang with me, yeah?” Marcel laughed, pulling her towards her. She wiggled out of his hold. 

“Nosss humph.” Teddy huffed again, folding her arms over her chest. She was still holding on to some serious resentment towards him because of his relationship with Gracie.

“What’s with the attitude?” Marcel laughed a little more. He shouldn’t but he almost fueled her behavior because he thought it was funny the way she huffed about but still managed to remain really cute. 

“My Celly only, tays?”  She repeated her statement that had been on a loop lately to him. She wanted him to understand that Gracie had to go in her mind. That wasn’t really an option nor her decision but she’d try. 

“Sweetheart, come on! You're always going to be my best friend, I promise.” Marcel reassured her, picking her up and placing her on his lap. She smiled greedily and giggled happy with his confirmation. “Alright, so we’re good now?” He asked her and she nodded content that she was now sitting with him. “Good. I have some questions for you. How small do you think he’ll be?” He asked her just to keep her busy for god knows how much longer. 

“Small.” Teddy simply confirmed. He hummed, agreeing.  

“What do you think his name will be?” He asked her another question, one of many he was starting to think of.  

“Tom.” Teddy answered again very matter of fact. She said it as if she knew that was 100% correct. 100% going to be your son’s name but Marcel knew that wasn’t going to be the case. He was pretty sure he knew the names you’d narrowed it down to and ‘Tom wasn’t on that list. 

“Tom? Why?” He laughed a little at her. “You know what? Okay. My nephew Tom Alexander-Arnold. Got it.” He smiled as she nodded, verifying.   

“Did so well sweetie. I’m so proud of you.” Dianne cooed, giving you a gentle hug. You smiled at her with tear filled eyes. She and your mum were the first to come into the private room to meet your son. Early that evening you and Trent welcome your baby boy Theo James Alexander-Arnold into the world. He was perfect and there were no disagreements with that fact. Thankfully this time around both of your families were here and on time for the delivery, Trent included. 

“Let’s see him then.” Tyler came into the room shortly after to meet little Theo. You offered if he wanted to hold him but really you were having trouble even being a foot apart from him. “Ready to play in the prem, mate?” Tyler smiled running the back of his finger over his chubby cheek. This was already a running joke before you even had Teddy that there was this predetermined destiny for a child of Trent’s to play football but it really kicked off once all the boys in your life found out you were having a son. It was all in good fun of course but at the moment you were really emotional. You pouted at Trent sadly. He took Theo back from Tyler but not before giving him a reassuring nod that he was sure that that was going to happen. He kissed Theo and placed him in your arms softly.  

“No, he’s going to stay with mummy forever.” You held Theo to your skin letting his head rest against your chest as you began to cry again. “Never ever leaving my perfect baby boy.” You frowned looking at how adorable he looked. Trent hushed you sliding next to you on the hospital bed, taking a seat. “He’s so perfect. I love him.”  You explained to him but kept your eyes locked on him.

“Yeah, I know, baby. You did so well. Look at him. I actually think he looks a little like me.” Trent teased running his hand gently over his son's head.  You started blubbering crying. Trent let out a sympathetic breathy laugh at you. “Hey, just joking. It’s okay.” He kissed your forehead. 

“He looks like you. He looks just like you, T and he’s perfect… and beautiful.”  You kept crying. You were a mess. You don’t know why you felt so protective this time around. Of course you did with Teddy but you were also slightly terrified having it be your first pregnancy. 

“He’s pretty cute, huh?” Trent asked you inspecting your little boy. You nodded. Trent was emotional after Theo was born. He was balling in fact. 

“I’m so proud of you. You did so well, beautiful. You’re did so amazing.” Trent kept his lips pressed to your hair. You could feel him shake a little. He was crying. He was having a hard time wrapping his head around the fact that you had created one more little miracle that was finally in your arms. Theo Alexander-Arnold was an exact replica of Trent, marginally more than Teddy even was. You could already make out the little dimples indented in his cheeks. His nose, the shape of lips, everything was perfectly matched and perfectly cute.  “He’s everything baby. I’m so in love with him.” He cooed, eyes full of tears as he ran his hand over Theo’s head. “I am so grateful for you and all the sacrifices you’ve made for us and for him. I love you so much, beautiful.” He whimpered, leaning over more to see him. He gently nudged his nose against Theo’s tiny identical one. Theo batted his eyes open and Trent sucked in breath. The same perfectly warm deep brown eyes he had looking back at him. He fell in love instantly, completely in awe.   “He’s so beautiful. I can’t believe we made him.” You cried through a smile tugging at your lips as you inspected the tiny cherubic figure in your arms. Trent looked at you. You were absolutely glowing. Your eyes were tear stained but shining bright, filled with love. You were flush but your skin had never been softer. You were perfect. His heart swelled to the point where he got a little nervous it was possible it could burst. He would do anything for you and that little boy, Teddy too. 

“Shhh, baby. You’re okay. Just close your eyes for me, alright? Can you try to rest for a little while?” He asked you. You initially tried to say no  “Your boys will stay right here with you, I promise.” You gasped in a breath hearing ‘your boys’ for the first time in your life starting up crying again. Trent delicately took Theo out of your hold.

“Oh my gosh… You guys are making me cry stop.” Winnie cried along with you sitting in a chair in the room. Having missed your first birth she was a mess seeing you. Trent rolled his head to see Winnie pouting looking at you two.  

“Okay.. Okay.. come on though. Let’s go see mummy and daddy and your new brother.” Marcel cooed to Teddy holding her hand coming into the room. 

“Mummy matter?” Teddy yelped out too loud despite Marcel’s earlier instructions to be quiet. He laughed, shaking his head at her disregard once she saw you laying in the bed with an IV in your arm. She ran to the side of the bed Trent was seated on and he smiled with a laugh as she attempted to use him to climb onto the bed. “You tay?” She asked you, concerned. 

“I’m okay, Teddy girl. Come here, baby.” You smiled and reassured her. Winnie picked her up to help Trent and placed her on the bed between you two. “Can you say hi to your baby brother?” You asked her quietly. She tilted her head actually taking a closer look at the swaddled baby in Trent’s arms she hardly noticed before. 

“Hi baby. Is my Celly?” She asked you sitting up to peer into Trent’s arms that made you laugh a little. 

“Yeah, but this is your baby brother, Theo. Have to look after him and be the best big sister for me, okay, baby?” You cooed, running your hand over Theo’s head gently. Trent reached towards her and pulled her onto his lap with a kiss to her head and helped her hold Theo in front of him.

“Oh Tio… hmm.” Teddy spoke looking at the baby in her arms. “Hi Tio, we can share my mummy, tay?” She cooed kissing him. She was so sweet and gentle it made you start crying again. Winnie quick to follow. You guessed for the foreseeable future he would be ‘Tio’ to Teddy as opposed to ‘Theo’ with an h.

“What about daddy? Gonna share me too?” Trent asked her, dropping his head to press the side of his cheek to hers looking at Theo. 

“Nos tanks.” She replied with zero hesitation. Very sure of herself that daddy was not going to be on the table yet but she’d settle sharing you. 

“Teddy, can you watch mummy for me? I’m just going to get her a drink from the kitchen quickly, okay?” Trent asked Teddy standing up from the couch. A few days passed of having Theo in your lives and you were exhausted. You had fallen asleep next to Teddy. Theo was in a bassinet. Trent didn’t really need her to do anything but it’d make her feel important. It was important to make Teddy not feel left out despite all the focus on him. He could see and hear Theo from the kitchen and you’d be fine. You needed sleep.  

“Tay, dada.” Teddy confirmed plopping her head onto you. You shuffled a little maternally knowing it was your little girl without a thought. You pulled her into you instinctually.  

“Dada, mummy won’t let goes.” Teddy complained a little while later after Trent returned and you still hadn’t released her. She was getting bored.  

“Oh, I’m sorry baby.” He laughed. You looked happy with Teddy but he knew she was getting restless. He kissed your cheek a few times settling behind you before leaning to whisper into your ear. “Can you let go of our Teddy bear, please.” He smiled, flashing a wink up to Teddy. She giggled when you reluctantly let go of her. “C’mere. Can give me a cuddle instead, yeah?” Trent cooed pulling you back into him burying his face into the nap of your neck, kissing your skin. 

“Hello big sister.” Dianne cooed as Teddy ran to the front door to greet her after she let herself in to your house.  

“Nana shhh! Mama sleep with dada and baby.” Teddy explained to Dianne pushing her finger flush against her lips signaling her to be quiet. 

“Oh goodness. I’m sorry, are they upstairs?” Dianne asked her, lowering her voice. You knew Dianne was coming over but of course, she didn’t know what room you’d be in. She smiled, letting Teddy take her hand and drag her into the living room where you were after Teddy answered a simple ‘nos’ to her question. 

“Hey mum.” Trent lowly whispered, sitting up a bit but keeping you in his arms. “Sorry, Y/N just finally is sleeping. I didn’t want to get up. I’m not sure the last time she slept so…” Trent gave Dianne a sympathetic smile. 

“It’s good for her to rest. Let me see that beautiful boy. Looks just like daddy, huh?” Dianne gently picked up Theo from his bassinet as he began to wake. “Teddy girl, come with me and Theo to get you a snack. Want to come with us to the kitchen?” Diane asked Teddy who had just plopped herself on the carpet. Dianne winked at Trent knowing it’d probably be nice to just have a moment with no kids even if it was only for five minutes, even if they were only in the other room. 

“Hi…” You pouted as you woke up exhausted in Trent’s arms. Your eyes fluttered open more as you nuzzled into him until panic rushed through your entire body. “Wait! Where is he? T…” You looked at him terrified, almost on the verge of tears. God, you were so tired. 

“Baby, he’s with my mum. He’s okay. You’re okay. I got ya.” He cooed gently, kissing your lips. You nodded relieved. He leaned forward a little more and you thought he was going to kiss you again. You tilted your head ready to let your lips meet. He didn’t though. Instead Trent ran the tip of his nose against yours. You left out a shaky breath as he pressed his forehead to yours. “I’ve got you, I’ve got Teddy, and I’ve got Theo. Promise I will take care of all of you.” He whispered. You felt your heart falter hearing him. 

“We’re so lucky to have you daddy.” You smiled. You were going to say more but you heard Teddy’s giggle along with the scamper of your dogs come rushing out of the kitchen. Suddenly Theo’s cries began. Trent cupped your cheek and ran his thumb over your skin. He gave you a cheeky smile. He sat up and you sighed as he pulled you with him. 

“Where you going baby bear!” Trent cooed, reaching out and nabbing Teddy mid run swinging her off the ground. Her giggles continuing. You got up and took Theo back from Dianne as they entered the room and calmed him down. Trent came to you with Teddy in one of his arms and pulled you and your little boy into them with his other. “They're ours, baby. All ours.” He laughed a little and you sighed before he pecked your lips. You smiled up at him with a happiness you never wanted to loose and returned the kiss.

•

Thank you for reading! Please like, comment, or message what you think of the chapter and the entire series 🤍

I cannot believe the series is officially over. I really can't express how much I loved talking about this with anyone that has messaged. The first part of The Epilogue is out now! I hope the official conclusion will do Y/N and Trent's story justice.

The End 🫶🤍✨🧸

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Homebrew Mechanic: Meaningful Research

Being careful about when you deliver information to your party is one of the most difficult challenges a dungeonmaster may face, a balancing act that we constantly have to tweak as it affects the pacing of our campaigns.

That said, unlike a novel or movie or videogame where the writers can carefully mete out exposition at just the right time, we dungeonmasters have to deal with the fact that at any time (though usually not without prompting) our players are going to want answers about what's ACTUALLY going on, and they're going to take steps to find out.

To that end I'm going to offer up a few solutions to a problem I've seen pop up time and time again, where the heroes have gone to all the trouble to get themselves into a great repository of knowledge and end up rolling what seems like endless knowledge checks to find out what they probably already know. This has been largely inspired by my own experience but may have been influenced by watching what felt like several episodes worth of the critical role gang hitting the books and getting nothing in return.

I've got a whole write up on loredumps, and the best way to dripfeed information to the party, but this post is specifically for the point where a party has gained access to a supposed repository of lore and are then left twiddling their thumbs while the dm decides how much of the metaplot they're going to parcel out.

When the party gets to the library you need to ask yourself: Is the information there to be found?

No, I don't want them to know yet: Welcome them into the library and then save everyone some time by saying that after a few days of searching it’s become obvious the answers they seek aren’t here. Most vitally, you then either need to give them a new lead on where the information might be found, or present the development of another plot thread (new or old) so they can jump on something else without losing momentum.

No, I want them to have to work for it:  your players have suddenly given you a free “insert plothook here” opportunity. Send them in whichever direction you like, so long as they have to overcome great challenge to get there. This is technically just kicking the can down the road, but you can use that time to have important plot/character beats happen.

Yes, but I don’t want to give away the whole picture just yet:  The great thing about libraries is that they’re full of books, which are written by people,  who are famously bad at keeping their facts straight. Today we live in a world of objective or at least peer reviewed information but the facts in any texts your party are going to stumble across are going to be distorted by bias. This gives you the chance to give them the awnsers they want mixed in with a bunch of red herrings and misdirections. ( See the section below for ideas)

Yes, they just need to dig for it:  This is the option to pick if you're willing to give your party information upfront while at the same time making it SEEM like they're overcoming the odds . Consider having an encounter, or using my minigame system to represent their efforts at looking for needles in the lithographic haystack. Failure at this system results in one of the previous two options ( mixed information, or the need to go elsewhere), where as success gets them the info dump they so clearly crave.

The Art of obscuring knowledge AKA Plato’s allegory of the cave, but in reverse

One of the handiest tools in learning to deliver the right information at the right time is a sort of “slow release exposition” where you wrap a fragment lore the party vitally needs to know in a coating of irrelevant information,  which forces them to conjecture on possibilities and draw their own conclusions.  Once they have two or more pieces on the same subject they can begin to compare and contrast, forming an understanding that is merely the shadow of the truth but strong enough to operate off of. 

As someone who majored in history let me share some of my favourite ways I’ve had to dig for information, in the hopes that you’ll be able to use it to function your players.

A highly personal record in the relevant information is interpreted through a personal lens to the point where they can only see the information in question 

Important information cameos in the background of an unrelated historical account

The information can only be inferred from dry as hell accounts or census information. Cross reference with accounts of major historical events to get a better picture, but everything we need to know has been flattened into datapoints useful to the bureaucracy and needs to be re-extrapolated.

The original work was lost, and we only have this work alluding to it. Bonus points if the existent work is notably parodying the original, or is an attempt to discredit it.

Part of a larger chain of correspondence, referring to something the writers both experienced first hand and so had no reason to describe in detail. 

The storage medium (scroll, tablet, arcane data crystal) is damaged in some way, leading to only bits of information being known. 

Original witnesses Didn’t have the words to describe the thing or events in question and so used references from their own environment and culture. Alternatively, they had specific words but those have been bastardized by rough translations. 

Tremendously based towards a historical figure/ideology/religion to the point that all facts in the piece are questionable.  Bonus points if its part of a treatise on an observably untrue fact IE the flatness of earth

[allmyocsarebritish]

Unspoken words, still recieved

Pairing: Alastor X reader

Warnings(?): fluff, mentions of drugs and alcohol, 5+1

Husk

~

Husker was the first to know about your feelings towards his overlord. It had been a long, stressful day filled with Charlie's 'bonding exercises', and you wanted nothing more than to crash at the bar with a strong drink in hand. So, that was how you ended up swirling a glass of alcohol, taking the occasional sip which scorched your throat and fogged your troubled mind. Naturally, in your tipsy state your tongue was greatly loosened. Husker knew this; he was an experienced bartender, and used to listening to the bitching and whining of those intoxicated. What he didn't anticipate was exactly what slipped out.

"What would you do if you really liked someone, but you knew that they hated that kind of thing? And they'd probably hate you too if they found out?" You asked, lazily drawing circles on the counter top with your finger. Husk sighed deeply in slight irritance, once again ready to assume the role of therapist, offering a listening ear to your irrelevant problems.

"I wouldn't know, kid. I lost the ability to feel years ago." He continued to wipe the countertop, a slight frown prevalent on his extended eyebrows (what kind of description is that lmfao).

"Pfft, edgelord." You scoffed light heartedly, to which Husk offered a small smile of amusement, still not meeting your eyes.

"I guess I'll just keep it all to myself then. I doubt Al would appreciate any sort of elaborate romantic gesture anyway." You downed the last of your drink, hopping off of your stool and fishing into your pocket for change. Husk's eyes narrowed at the mention of the Radio Demon, a shadow of concern crossing his features. He gently grasped your sleeve as you reached out with a few coins, tip included, stopping you from placing them on the counter.

"Al? As in Alastor? Oh, Y/N, you've got to be fucking kidding me."

Your eyes narrowed at this. You expected the miserable old bartender to be disapproving, but hearing him voice his doubts was unpleasant to say the least.

"No, I don't think I am."

Husk rolled his eyes, your sleeve now firmly held between his claws, in a way that would rip the fabric should you try to pull away.

"Listen, kid. I know I'm not here to be your pop or anything but please, for the love of everything, stay safe. He's a dealmaker, and I wouldn't put anything past him." He could feel the invisible neon green leash uncomfortably cold against his furry neck.

"Fuck off, Husker. I can look after myself. Thanks for the drink." You scoffed, pulling away, not caring for the fresh tear in your shirt.

Husk's eyes continued to fix on the direction you exited long after your shadow had disappeared.

"Good luck, kid."

~

Charlie

Charlie was next to know, which, was inevitably going to happen eventually. It was a few weeks following your drunken outburst at the bar, and you could frequently feel Husk's eyes boring into you when you looked away. The pity was infuriating, who the fuck was he to tell you what your Alastor was like?

Charlie, ever the curious devil, noticed the tension radiating from both you and the cat, and decided to involve herself in an attempt to force the two of you back into your companionship.

"Sooo, Y/N," She clasped her hands together, bouncing up behind you as you crossed through the lobby of the hotel, her doe eyes wide and practically pleading. "I noticed you and Husk fell out. But you seemed so close to him!"

"I mean, not really." You shrugged, already trying to walk away from the awkward conversation. "He gave me whiskey, I paid him, we talked a little. I wouldn't call that 'close'."

"But what happened?" The little hellborn princess was persistent, you'd give her that.

"Husker won't understand that he doesn't dictate how I feel about someone." Deep down you knew that was a massive escalation to the situation. It wasn't Husk's fault, he was trying to keep you safe. But you weren't a child, and certainly not his.

"Wait, how you feel about someone? Y/N, do you have a crush?!"

Shit.

"It- it's not a crush." You fucked up. Big time.

"You have a crush!"

"Charlie! Stop!" Your tone was harsh, potentially too much so, causing the demon to back off slightly, although not completely.

"Oh, okay, well I've been known to be an excellent wingman! Woman? Wingwoman? It doesn't matter, if you feel comfortable I'd be absolutely honoured if you trusted-"

You zoned out halfway through her tangent, not having your usual energy to find amusement in her theatrics. You promptly excused yourself, slipping out of the hotel, preparing yourself to take a walk and clear your mind.

"Princess, I know you want to help her, don't push it. The best thing you can do is let her deal with it herself. Trust me, I'd know." Husk warned following your departure, memories of your hostile response to his advice fresh in his mind.

Charlie absolutely did push it.

In fact, you could probably consider her behaviour that followed for the next two weeks low-level stalking. It was her mission to set you up with whoever you fancied. After all, all she wanted was for you to be happy.

Although, after 14 whole days of trying her hardest, she had almost given up on finding out who it was that caught your eye. That was until she saw you with Alastor. It was subtle, not something anyone would notice had they not been searching. But the level of digging she had done on you made it obvious.

The respect you held for the overlord was unmatched by any other. Your usual fairly hot-headed personality had much less of a bite, more aimed towards others than the radio star. Not to mention the way your eyes lit up as soon as he entered the room.

Oh.

Well, this was a spanner in the works she didn't expect. But it was alright, if there was a way for you and Al to be together, Charlie would do her best to help you both reach that conclusion.

~

Vaggie

Naturally, as soon as Charlie knew of your feelings, so did Vaggie. This was to be expected, even though you weren't necessarily aware that the princess was onto you, it wasn't rocket science that word would pass eventually.

"I just need to find a way to set them up! Oh Vaggie, how cute would they be?!"

Charlie paced through their shared bedroom, ranting to her girlfriend as the fallen angel sat on the bed.

"Cute? Alastor?" Vaggie snorted, refusing to accept that as a way to describe him.

"But Vaggie!! Imagine them together! Oh, she could absolutely soften him up! Imagine Alastor all sweet and in love! Maybe it'll push him into redemption and they can be all smiling and happy in heaven!!"

"Babe," Vaggie interrupted the ceaseless yapping (I'm so sorry but there's no other way to accurately phrase it lmao. Charlie's a yapper) "Seriously don't push it. You know Alastor isn't the type to go all gooey eyed over some girl, even if it is someone he's close to. So don't expect anything, just leave her to get over it herself."

Charlie drew out a long, exaggerated sigh, showing her disappointment.

"I know you want to make them happy, sweetie, but some things just aren't meant to be." Vaggie held her girlfriend's hands in one of her own, the other resting on the Princess's cheek.

Ultimately, Vaggie held a high level of concern for you in this scenario. She hoped and prayed for your safety, though she knew better than to meddle in your business. Despite this, she did make a mental note to keep an eye on you, the angel would never forgive herself if you made a deal she could have prevented. Of course, none of this she could voice to Charlie; her girlfriend adored Alastor and looked up to him, so she opted to keep this to herself, as she hoped you would do also.

~

Angel

Angel was someone in the hotel whom you truly did consider a friend. And, friends trust friends, or at least according to your wasted brain they did. So, you came clean to the spider, and, in the process, subjected yourself to an eternity of even more torment. For fuck's sake, you were already in hell.

"Angel?" You asked cautiously, tone sending a shiver of worry into the demon. Your voice held an aura of seriousness, something that made him rather uncomfortable.

"Ya'lright, toots?" He asked, his own words reflecting the slight anxiousness you had bestowed.

"Yeah, just got a 2am confession to make." You responded, eyes focusing on the ceiling, your body draped over Angel's bed. The two of you were sprawled over it with your heads together in the middle, although the spider was substantially closer to toppling off than yourself. He chuckled at your revelation, feeling the slight worry vanish.

"Well, then go ahead."

You took a deep breath, drug induced confidence already beginning to ebb. Another long drag of your joint however, and sobering up was no longer a cause for concern. Yet.

"You know Alastor?"

"Yeah?" Angel asked, already suspicious of how this was going.

"I'm just saying-"

"HeAr mE oUt" Angel mocked, to which you swatted his arm, leading to the star erupting into a fit of laughter at you retaliation.

"You're inta Smiles?!" Angel laughed "Well, Sugar tits, now I've seen everythin!"

"Shut the fuck up, Anthony." You grumbled, despite suppressing a smirk at Angel's antics. There was no getting yourself out of this one now.

~

Niffty

Niffty was not one you were expecting to have to explain yourself to. But, being the nosy little bug she was, you realised only too late that she was peering at your phone screen as you texted Angel Dust.

"You like Alastor?"

"What? No! I-" Niff's singular, unblinking eye bore directly into you soul, unsettling you and making your mouth run dry with unease. You sighed, holding up your hands in submission.

"Maybe."

"I think you should go tell him! You know he really likes you too? I honestly can't blame you, he is a bad boy" the little bug let out an unhinged, slightly manical laugh. You cringed at the way she referred to your Alastor, almost entirely missing the part where she said he liked you back.

Wait.

He liked you back?

You tried your bloody hardest not to raise your hopes after that one, this was Niffty we were talking about. But regardless, there was a possibility!

"Wait, he likes me too?" You asked, trying not to show the way adrenaline and excitement pumped through your body at this potential revelation.

"Oh, yeah. I heard him talking to Rosie about it a couple weeks 'go. Said it was a 'disgusting weakness he couldn't show to anyone'"

Oh.

Well.

That wasn't exactly helpful.

But at least he liked you back?

"So what did she say?!" You asked, suspense rising.

"Who?" Niffty asked, eyes wide and staring at you in utter bewilderment.

"Rosie!" You responded incredulously.

"About what?"

"Alastor!"

"Oh! She said that he should get over it and just tell you, that he'd feel better and even if you didn't feel the same way you'd understand 'cause you're human too. And if not he could just eat you."

"What?!!"

"Although I might have made that last part up." She tapped a spindly finger against her chin in concentration, trying her hardest to recall the conversation.

Your brows raised in concern before shaking your head and resigning not to question her.

"Okay, well, thanks, Niff. I gotta go now but I appreciate you telling me!" Your exit was rushed, but you really didn't want Niffty to catch you delighting in your newfound optimism. (Kicking your heels and squealing).

~

Alastor

Two days. You had spent two days preparing what you would say to Al and how, yet no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't for the (after) life of you think of what to do or say.

The worst part was the fact your favourite bartender was no longer there for you to turn to when life got tricky. So, you resolved to drowning your sorrows in your own alcohol, and, in the process, inexplicably and subconsciously avoiding your Alastor.

The Radio Demon did not like this.

Every time he descended to the lobby you were missing. Every time he walked to Cannibal town you weren't accompanying him. Every time he broadcasted you weren't waiting for him outside the tower.

This was becoming a problem; Alastor held you so highly in his estimations that he found your presence more than tolerable. So the fact that you just up and disappeared left him feeling an odd sensation.

Emptiness? It was strange, unpleasant and Alastor didn't like it. He was no fool: he knew of his feelings for you, and, after months of denial, finally reached some sort of acceptance of the merciless scenario he found himself in. Such a powerful overlord resigned to a schoolboy crush. Pathetic, really.

But, this loneliness wouldn't do. No, it wouldn't do at all. So, Alastor was going to do something about it. Force proximity with you? Of course not, that was far too desparate, even for these circumstances.

His eyes trailed across the lobby before landing on the bar, and subsequently, the bartender. Bingo!

"Husker! My dear fellow~"

"Go fuck yourself." The cat raised a middle finger to Alastor, bottle held to his lips and tilted.

"Now is that any way to talk to your old pal?" Al taunted. Oh this was fun; how he adored pissing off Husk. In fact, he almost even forgot the motivation for his inquiry.

You.

"Say, Husker. Is there a chance that you've seen Y/N around here recently? She seems to be avoiding me for some strange reason."

Husk scoffed and rolled his eyes. "I wonder why."

Alastor's eyes narrowed as his smile tensed. "Careful, my friend." He warned.

"Listen, boss," Venom spiked the cat's tone, insincerity lacing the word. "I haven't seen her in a week or so. We had a... disagreement and she's avoiding me. Go find her yourself if you're so fucking concerned."

Well, that was conclusive. "Indeed I will. So long, Husker!" Al hopped off the barstool and made for your room, hoping you would be there, as to not look a fool.

Yes, that was it.

Raising a fist to the door, the Radio Demon knocked.

Once. Twice. Thrice.

At the third and final knock, you opened the door, recognising the clear, precise knock.

"Hello, my dear!" His transatlantic voice rang out, laced with static as ever.

"Hi, Al." You responded, quiet and solemnly.

"Why so glum? Smile, my dear! You know you're never fully dressed without one!" His clawed fingers came to rest at the corners of your mouth, delicately and fondly pushing upwards. His own permanent grin softened as he looked at you, and you couldn't help but lean into his touch.

"Have you been intentionally avoiding me, Cher?" He blurted out, surprising even himself.

"What?! Ha, Al, don't make me laugh! I'd never avoid you, how ridiculous!"

He narrowed his eyes at you. "Cher."

"Al."

"Be honest with me."

There it was. That thing he had about him, making it impossible to lie.

"I wasn't intentionally avoiding you." You drew out. " And I'm sorry, I didn't mean to."

"But, why?"

"Because I love you."

After freezing like a deer in headlights, (HA) his face morphed into an expression entirely unreadable, even to you.

Shit.

Fuck.

Bollocks.

You fucked up. That was it. Friendship over. Potentially even afterlife over.

"Al? I'm sorry I-" you were interrupted but the feeling of his arms wrapping around you. It was slow and gentle, as though you were made of fragile porcelain, easily breakable beneath his warm embrace.

"It's okay, Cher"

I love you too unspoken words, yet still received.

Bonus:

You hopped onto the barstool as Husk refused to meet your eyes. A long, awkward silence drew out, and you kicked your legs, fingers drumming on your knee. Realising there was no way the bartender was speaking first, you resolved to dive straight into your apology.

"Husk? I'm sorry. I was a bitch and shouldn't have taken it out on you because you were only trying to keep me safe-"

Your apology was cut short as a shot of whiskey slid across the counter towards you. You smirked and brightened when you looked up to meet Husk grinning at you.

"Well if that wasn't the most insincere fucking bullshit I've ever heard."

You rolled your eyes, downing the alcohol in one, causing your throat to sting and eyes to water.

"Just stay safe, kid. That's all I ask."

"Deal." You joked, sticking out your hand.

"Deal." Husk responded sarcastically, though the both of you knew it was lightheaded. You were just grateful to have your favourite bartender back.