#but that doesnt mean they dont deserve a chance at change and a better life away from the nightmare called claw

[espectres]

so tempted to add npcs. extensive ramble in the tags.

[raveneira]

'Ada deserves better than Kawaki'

The worst thing Kawaki has done to Ada

The worst things Ada has done to Kawaki

The worst Kawaki ever did to Ada was grab her collar to force her to lie which she could've disobeyed, thats it.

The worst things Ada did to Kawaki is

Trade everybody important to Kawaki in exchange for Code to spare him so she can pursue him, essentially human trafficking according to Bug, which is a horrible experience Kawaki's already gone through

Asking Code to spare Naruto after seeing how much he meant to Kawaki but when he refuses she says fine and to just not let Kawaki know shes involved because she dont want him to hate her, but could care less about the pain losing Naruto would have on him

She could've sent Daemon to intervene when Momo was brutally beating Kawaki and then about to kill Naruto right infront of him yet she sat there watching the whole thing and never tried to help despate literally watching in real time the despair Kawaki was in watching Naruto about to die.

She says Codes goals have nothing to do with her and that shes only helping him in exchange for Kawaki, yet when Shikamaru offers to make that happen without Code she still chooses to leave with Code and help him get his limiters off knowing how difficult that'd make things for everyone he cares about because she knows in the end they'd have to rely on her and Daemon for protection which'll give her access to Kawaki in exchange for that protection

Forced him on glorified house arrest

She holds the entire village hostage by the fact that they need Daemons strength and Ada's sight to deal with Code in exchange for getting to live with Kawaki against his will, Kawaki is not asked for his consent about ANY of this and it was all a deal that Amado and Shikamaru made with her on his behalf and she did not care as long as she's benefiting from Kawaki's trafficking

She allows her brother to beat Kawaki unconscious UNINTERUPPTED when they first meet and does not apologize to him for it

When Kawaki confronts her about her partnership with Code and correctly deduces that she sold Boruto out in exchange for him, Ada doesnt feel any remorse for it nor does she apologize for her selfishness, instead she changes the subject altogether and doesnt even address it

Even though it was unintentional she made omnipotence happen and completely miscontrued what Kawaki wanted by making him take Boruto's place entirely when all he actually wanted, and clearly stated, was for Boruto to be seen as an outsider so that nobody would interfere or feel bad when he kills him

Because of her now Kawaki is being forced to live a miserable life with everyone treating him like Boruto when he doesnt want that and also listening to ppl talk about how much they actually hate him and want him dead everytime they talk about Boruto who they really mean Kawaki when they say those cruel things. Meanwhile Ada is at home chillin without a care in the world about how her mess has affected him, infact she just suggests giving up on trying to undo it despite supposedly feeling bad for making Kawaki seem like a coward.

STFU

Ada does NOT deserve better, KAWAKI does, from the moment she's been introduced, literally the MOMENT she was introduced she didnt give a danm about Kawaki's feelings or consent AT ALL and made multiple deals disregarding the ppl he cares about with 3 different ppl in exchange for him like he wasnt even a human being but a piece of property to be bought and sold.

She felt zero remorse, I repeat, she felt ZERO remorse about working with Code who nearly killed Naruto right infront of him, and sold his brother out in exchange for him, when confronted about it by Kawaki himself and she has the chance to apologize she DOESNT do it, not just there, but she NEVER owns up to the fked up things she did nor apologizes to him for it, yet she apologizes to Boruto multiple times despite Kawaki being the one she supposedly loves.

How anybody, and I mean ANYBODY thinks Ada's the victim here is beyond me, even more so how anyone thinks Kawaki would ever even CONSIDER being together with her after all this when he himself has said she's scum and that he would've rathered taken his chances with Code than even meet her, 3 years have passed and Ada is still sitting home alone while Kawaki completely ignores her existence, how any of you think this ship has ANY possibility of happening is laughable, its even worse than KawaSumi's chances and theirs are low as hell too, but even that has more of a chance than Ada ever will.

So like I said, stfu, Ada doesnt deserve better, Kawaki does, if anything Ada deserves WORSE because she has gotten off scott free with no repercussions for way too long.

[leninova1997]

Really random headcanon stuff about Doom3guy from my novel (series) 'cause why not

Obviously, he is not and never will be my own character. Yet doesnt mean i cannot work on him and extend his personal depth in the name of creation.

- He is easily fitting into the “silent but deadly” type. Not a huge fan of wasting his time on small talk or somehow have them change their minds: he either takes his chances in action or nothing else (well, for the most part that is)

- From the outside, he can be seem like a cold, distant, unfriendly individual who has no feelings and only has interest in his own things. While in reality, he is just a person who is extremely picking when it comes to trust and reliability (mostly taken from his own experiences). He wont spare anything on those who dont deserve it. His introverted side doesnt “help” the situation either (he doesnt really care since this kind of operating has proven to be more useful in the long run, even with all the disadvantages intact). In fact, he may not be the most easily approachable person, however he has a truly loving heart that has all the place to those who he really cares about. You could even say he has a totally changed personality when they are around: he is talkative, friendly, very supportive, encouraging and smiles a lot. Its a rare sighing yet stunning to see and experience. 

- He is the type of guy who would stay behind and fight to his last drop of blood just to make sure, anyone who is involved gets to have the change to be saved. He puts everybody in the first place, then himself on the second. It is not rooted in ego rather in his fundamental beliefs: he is the leader, he is the man, he is the father - he has to step up, has to be the strongest line of defence and at the same time be ready for the possibility to give the best of his best or even his life for others. And he is never shy about projecting this kind of view: he is absolutely convinced, this is the reason he is around and the main purpose of his existence. If you ask me, his father had a great influence on him for sure 

- He was born on the 13th of January, 2118 (not friday!). Originally the place of birth was New York City, then decided to ditch the idea for a better alternative and a sharper narrative contrast. I hope one day you get to see why

- He joined the marines right after he graduated from high school. He was not only preparing heavily for the entry test (we all know who notoriously hard it is and i can confidently believe this wont change a lot in the future) during the 4 years but was a huge dream of his (again, his father’s influence since he served the UAC in the same way, for a fairly long time before his death). Before he got stripped from his rank and achievements, he made it to the “sergeant” (and wasnt too far to make it to “staff sergeant”). 

- He got married with his high school sweetheart not soon after he got accepted to join the marine corps. Their connection is much more based on deep emotional and intellectual properties rather than purely on physical attraction (its there though). Essentially they are total opposites who complete each other (like she is an very open, overly kind hearted and emotionally expressive individual yet a little bit naive and shy) but that doesnt automatically mean they cannot attach to the same principles and live by that. Its more about balance and a steady state that they are both happy and confident in. Also, one of the simplest conformations about their dynamic is how they usually sleep: big spoon - small spoon since it not only represents perfectly their inner sides but their relation to each other in the relationship (or because its romantic in this way and they like it a lot, lol)

- His wife and daughter (born in 2138) not only represent a strong pillar in his life but something essential he can always return to find refuge and (emotional) support in. He is a tough guy with a strong personality and enough hard times behind his back, yet he is not immune to the overwhelming hopelessness and sadness that lingers around and even more inside him. This kind of craving for care become much more evident when he returned back from Mars and had to deal with the trauma of the invasion, the truth and the agonizing nightmares that never stopped haunting him for years. His wife worked as a psychiatrist for the Company, although it wasnt truly her expertise in the field that were needed in these cases, rather her affectionate and devoted nature that helped him out the gutter many times. 

Sorry, i had to put this gif here because its so beautiful  😭 😭 😭

- He has his own interest in many things, but the most important was always drawing to him, especially in an illustrative way. He has a great photographic memory, so combining this with his skills, it often results in well made even stunning art pieces. He kind of neglected his hobby when he become the member of the army, but after his daughter was born, he started to return back to it more and more. He didnt really imagine himself doing this for long or for life, however the entertainment value never seemed to fade away

- He is a huge fan of travelling, specially in tropical and/or warmer areas such as the Mediterranean peninsula, Central and South America and some parts of Southeast Asia. Wasnt the best experience for him though when he had to serve in such places like Syria, Libanon and Libya since the temperature and the environmental conditions were unbearable at best (along with the warzones he had to anticipate in). But to prove somewhat he is an actual admirer: he had his honeymoon in Portugal (it was a short weekend) which he still likes to relive to this day. 

- He is a great grandson of a somewhat “famous” individual (who is NOT polish and have nothing to do with WW2, rather was active during the difficult era from the early 2030s and later 2040s). His first name comes from his deceased uncle to honor his remembrance (thanks to his father) who was suffering from Duchenne dystrophy and died in an early age. His name was given when Mars and colonization was a hot topic during the 2090s and many parents named their child after or in connection with the planet. 

I hope you liked my mindblowing post, hope to make more in the future. I guess

Cheers

[wioaase]

guess who drank again?

its me. i thought altered states of consciousness were supposed to unlock more creativity but i got nothing lmao. anyways i wanted to write something? not proofread cuz i cant think rn <3

i wanna write something kinda hard but i feel like all im capable of is soft? yn tired of being mistreated and gives up on relationships all together and the boys try to make them feel better / take them out to prove that relationships (specifically with them) would be worth something?

chan

hates seeing you upset like this

completely understands

doesnt want you to give up completely

takes you out to dinner as just friends

you go back to your place for a movie afterwards

he tells you that you deserve better

that the nice dinner you had together is what you should expect from a partner

what he'd do for you

you think his confession / admittance to this is kinda silly until you see hes serious

"please yn. let me show you"

how could you say no to your best friend?

acts like a bf for the rest of the night

ends with yall either falling asleep together or "falling asleep" together

miniho

makes fun of you until he realizes youre actually upset

then feels kinda bad about it

agrees that relationships are kinda dogshit

because both of you have come to the same conclusion you spend more time together

during this time he realizes he may have been wrong

doesnt know how to bring up that hes changed his mind about relationships / is scared of ruining the bond youve made so far

stays quiet for a while until you make a comment about wishing dating could be as easy as it was hanging out with him

mindlessly states that you could just date him and itd be easier for both of you

doesnt register as a serious statement until you see him kinda flustered

you give it a rest for a day before asking him about it

doesnt want to pressure you into anything, tells you youll still be best friends regardless of his comment

shut him up by kissing him

surely you can try relationships one more time

changbin

absolute princess

would do the most after you get rejected / decide that other people arent worth your energy

easily buys you ice cream / is always able to clear his schedule whenever youre having a bad day and really need him

would never admit to crushing on you

lets you hang out at the studio when you dont want to be alone but have no where else to be

admires your company

doesnt realize his feelings until you continuously complain about none of your dates working out and all the people you see being shitty

jealous binnie

during one of your visits to the studio its just him and theres a bouquet of flowers in a vase you dont think too much of

he cant take you not saying anything / asking about it anymore

shyly begs you not to go on any more bad dates with people you meet through apps and to let him take you out just once

you take him up on his offer thinking hes just being a good friend

isnt until the end of the night you realize that he means more than friendship

butterflies butterflies butterflies for both of you

maybe ends in hand holding walking you home and maybe maybe maybe a kiss on the cheek as he drops you off

thinks about this night while laying in bed and kicking his feet / blushing

hyunjin

doesnt understand how you could give up on love?

love is everywhere

how dont you see it?

makes an effort to point out the nonromantic examples of love whenever youre together

you more or less roll your eyes because he knows what you really meant

he knows too but doesnt know how to show you without directly asking you to give him a chance

during one of your hangouts you make another joke about being alone forever

he hates seeing you hurting and cant do it anymore

cups your face in his hands

"please"

he almost looks like crying

you dont understand why but you make an effort to try and be more positive about relationships in your life

seeing you smile at an older couple as they go about their daily routine has him thinking about what life would look like if you two were together

thinks its a phase and tries to get over it but starts to paint you (oops)

eventually you find some paintings and ask him about it and he has to confess

youre scared of change but he promises you wont lose him even if things dont work out

puts a ton of effort into your first official date and is such a gentlemen it gives you butterflies

maybe you were wrong about relationships being hopeless

han

i love this man sm

would wholeheartedly agree when you rant to him about your most recent shitty date and tell you that all men are trash

your declaration that youve officially given up on relationships gives him the idea that he can freely flirt with you now

it started as a joke but the more he said it the more he genuinely believed it

didnt realize that he had caught feelings until you brought up maybe trying dating again

makes him sick to his stomach

after you go out on another date you want to meet up and talk about it but he makes up an excuse not to see you so you have to share the evening over text

hes terrified that youre going to replace him and hates himself for feeling that way but at the same time wants to be the only person that you need to depend on

you think his excuse is weird but text him regardless rather than telling him everything in person

hes secretly relieved when you say that you dont intend to see them agian

even more relieved that you told him over text cuz hes grinning like an idiot rn

decides to do something before you want to go on another date with someone thatll just leave you broken

does something omega cheesy like invite you over for your usual movie night

rose petals and candles and a card inside a bouquet

card defo has some shitty pickup line in it but it makes you laugh

baby boy is nervous but you just hug him and say sure

he thinks hes dreaming at this point and looks at you with heart eyes for the rest of the night

felix

would encourage you not to give up

offer to look through peoples dating profiles with you in an attempt to vet the shitty ones

the more he was helping you build your profile and look at potential candidates the more he wanted to say no to every potential match you had

makes a joke about dating you instead of going through the hassle of trying to find someone to date

what begins as a joke ends up weighing heavily on his mind and keeps him up at night

what if you two went out?

what would you say if he asked? would he be rejected? laughed at? ruin the friendship completely?

after this would be relatively quiet when you asked for help with dating

just tells you to trust your gut

youd have to physically go over to his place and confront him about it before hed tell you anything about it

would still be hella nervous

you find it cute though and tell him yes

he starts planning the next cafe date asap

seungmin

tells you youre unlovable

youre used to his tough love and accept it

delete any dating apps you had and officially give up on trying to meet other people

youre content for a while until it finally gets under your skin that everyone around you keeps nagging about finding you a relationship

you ask him to pretend to be your boyfriend to try and get everyone to stop asking questions about your personal life

he spends the entire night flirting with you and genuinely acting like boyfriend material

it fills the void in your heart momentarily

he considered it just helping out a friend but since that night hes seen you differently

have you always been that pretty?

eases off the harsh teasing and tries to compliment you more often

you notice eventually and make a comment

he brushes it off as nothing

youd have to instigate anything if you want things to go any further but some of that playful flirting has carried over since you asked him to pretend

jeongin

doesnt really understand why you care so much about being in a relationship in the first place?

like it genuinely doesnt make sense to him

if you have friends that treat you well why would you need anything more?

starts to worry that maybe he isnt doing enough as a friend

ups the game while unknowingly fulfilling boyfriend criteria

spends all his free time with you. texts you on breaks. finds himself thinking about you whenever hes not allowed to contact you for extended periods of time

performs better when hes able to hear your voice / see your face the day before a big event

would need someone else to point out that his feelings are growing past platonic

probably freaks out a little bit and ignores you for a day or two

plays it off as being sick even though you knew he was busy with other schedules

eventually confront him on it

isnt able to tell you exactly what hes feeling but does tell you that he doesnt like being apart from you

you think hes over exaggerating until you go out on another date with someone you dont know and one of the other boys texts you saying that jeongin is sad and youre the only one who can make him better

you try and joke with him to lift his mood but nothing helps

you fall asleep on video call with one another and when he thinks youre asleep he confesses

"sleeping angel.. i love you.."

you have to pretend to still be asleep despite hearing him or else hed never acknowledge it

when youre ready you can approach him and ask about it

until then though you can expect him to keep protecting you from a distance

[myfictionaldreams]

hi! i’m that asshole anon :/

at the time i really was just very upset about the fics! theres so many people who don't care to grow and change, or dont care if it “glamourizes” that behavior. it was for sure a knee jerk reaction. i definitely should have chosen my words better and could've for sure been kinder. I do want to say that while the dynamics weren't good your writing is FANTASTIC!!! ive seen you on ao3 and your work is sincerely really good.

i'm sorry that my (rude) message made you feel bad, i think you are an amazing writer and I appreciate you coming back with a nicer response than I would've. I really do feel bad.

your smut is done really well, and i’m hiding behind the anon wall because at first it was just bc i have a *tiny* following. but now its because i’m so very ashamed at my behavior. i do agree that that was shitty and I don’t deserve any kindness or good will.

i can see that you’re a growing writer and I do understand how much those kind of comments can be. again you are a good writer. i think maybe reading those felt like such a shock and I should’ve handled it better, maybe come to you in private with respect and after cooling down. i only wrote that to you because I wasn’t seeing disclaimers for the ones that i was talking about (on ao3)

i sincerely apologize, I hope that I didn’t make you feel bad or discourage you in any way. I was far too harsh and I understand that we are all human and none of us are perfect. I wanted to explain my feelings, but not excuse my actions. i wish i had a time machine. and i appreciate you as a writer, and when the time comes I hope you can forgive me <3

Hi! firstly sorry for taking a few days to respond my personal life has been very hectic & also needed to think about what/how to say my response.

Right, firstly i really really appreciate you returning and apologising and understanding that way that you worded the message was wrong etc and it’s clear from this message you do feel bad and understand that it was wrong so I do want to thank you for that.

However, I really do want to emphasis how difficult these negative/hateful messages make writers feel. This message or any other hate messages I will always remember, particularly when its feedback for things that aren’t intentinal (such as the bdsm dynamic you referred too). Sometimes writing doesn’t always come across how I wanted to in my mind and doesnt mean that it is written with malicious intent. Furthermore, there are ALWAYS warnings on my writing that I do feel like people just half read and don’t fully take into account. Yes, I could have labelled it further to specify that the reader enjoyed to be punished therefore there was pre-agreed consent but as I said, it was one of my very first fanfics so had a lot to learn still.

Again, I really do appreciate your response because every time I reply to a hateful anon, they never come back and I feel like it wasn’t worth the response in the first place so I’m very happy that you’ve actually read my explanation etc and giving me another chance.

Just for future though, for you or ANYONE going to send a message, always do it with kindness and education in mind. It’s hard to see that you have mentioned that you have enjoyed my other work so you know my writing style and still felt that one fic was glamourising something so negative you felt the need to send me a hurtful and patronising message instead of taking a moment to think ‘oh i like the other fics, this one is a bit different maybe i should message just to clarify’ - instead of what was sent in the first place and just assuming that I’m willing to write abusive fics.

But anyway, all is forgiven because I really hate negativity, I hope you are also doing ok, I do believe you are sorry and regret sending the message so everything is absolutely fine, lessons are learnt on both end of this interaction. Sending peace and love ღღ

[sereniv]

Just make it until 30 and see how you feel and go from there

30 feels so good

remember all the years where you were just learning colors and words? and then emotions and the concept of good and bad? and then learning more and more, going through puberty still stumbling around, your teens where your consciencness practically really just started-

and then your 20s is practically your teens, where youve had enough experience as a concience human to actually start doing something with it, to actually start beginning your life

your 20s you are still lame and awkward. you still worry about what people think to a point where it affects your life. you still care about trends, and being up to date. you feel like youve been wasting your life when you literally just started figuring things out

and by the time youre 30 its just...

ive seen so many people talk about how good 30 feels it feels like you can finally stop holding your breath

in your 20s and before, it feels tense like so much expectation

but once you reach 30 you are able to understand what actually matters. and it takes such a load off

everyone is different and some people have no option. literally no option. and i support those people. i love them. i understand as an outsider

i always say to wait, that there is always some other option, but for some that option is death.

But before that, wait until you are 30. not on the day, live until 31. And see where your options are and how you feel

and from what ive heard 40 is even better. and 50. and so on

I definitely am in a place of privilege because i am not on hell like some are. and ive been around those people, my mother was one and we all agreed that there was no other option . she wasnt living

i look back and i dont know if i was right. i have more knowledge now. there have long been more opportunities. different platforms new medications

right before she died, when we thought the pills didnt work, she wanted her favorite food and talked about wanting to go to the movies the next day

and that is such a common story

not to get all heavy on a more lighthearted post

but seriously for YOU, wait.

But also know you are not selfish for feeling like theres no other option. you are not selfish. it is selfish of others to only think of their wellbeing in the face of your pain

But know that too many times is there regret, there are people who lived after an attempt and glad they lived

who changed their mind before they fell

If you are already 30, reach 40. not for anyone but for you because you deserve after all the shit you have had to go through, to get some compensation for it.

and that doesnt mean happiness. no one can say for sure if you are going to be a textbook definition of happy

but how different could your life look? what new things can you find joy in and what old things become new under different circumstances

I have heard of terrible situations that people have been in, especially lately. And none of us have any place to keep people here who are not living life simply because we want them to stay

we can not claim to understand exactly how someone feels even in a situation we also have been through

but when you are in that terrible situation, and you feel that the only option is to kill yourself, remember that in any other circumstance, you would choose life

no one aspires to kill themselves. its not some goal people look forward to

This is why if you can, be vocal on how you feel. Be blunt. "I have no option left and i feel i need to kill myself and i need help from anyone to find more options for me"

You have to make sure there is not a hidden option. One no one close to you has thought of but maybe a stranger will

You deserve the chance at a life where you live, not just survive, not just a zombie going through the motions

if we had waited, there would have been more options for my mom.

If i had reached out to more people, maybe my friend wouldn't have gone back to her abusive household

if i had waited those options would become apparent to me.

If you are young, wait until you are 30. If you are 30, wait 10 more years, and so on.

move the goal post, until you cant. And remember that at least I support you. I dont want you to die, but you are not selfish. I am there with you even if we dont know each other

You are not a bad person. You are in pain, you hurt, you are at the worst youve ever experienced. And you deserve a better life, even if that might mean for some people, and end to that life

Again to be clear to anyone who hasnt seen this take before: People dont kill themselves because they want to, they do it because they feel they have to in order to escape trauma.

When i say i support these peoples decision i am not saying it lightly. ALWAYS do whatever you can do for however long you or others can to give this person options and oppurtunities.

But there becomes a point where there is nothing left. its been years, theyve hit their goals, theyve suffered and nothing has changed.

That is when you support them. When they need it the absolute most.

You are not urging them. Not at all. You are holding their hand and showing them that they are not vilified. that they matter so much, that you want whats best for them. And only them

In my experience, this has helped people step away from suicide at least for the time being. Because in the moment they are thinking of what they want to be rid of, but also what other people think of them killing themselves

this is why i am just 1000% against seeing suicide as selfish. it is NOT selfish because its not about YOU

Anyway. Ive been dealing with this my whole life, ive made mistakes and ive helped people. And this is what ive learned in my 31 years of life

you have to stay alive. you're going to be such a beautiful middle aged freak. young freaks will see you in the street and know that things can be okay.

[b0mblover]

scars dont last forever. (thankfully) nor do people.

By: J

vauge tw; i wrote this bc i over think fucking everything. ikitai by shimon has saved me once again /srs

again. keep in mind i dont reread most of this stuff.

this would be better suited on my main but since its writing.

Ah, fuck.

im getting really tired of the game i play with myself

constant abuse

its nothing new

smoking and drinking myself to near-death

its nothing new, almost like second nature.

those hateful words that he spewed,

those mean jabs that she said,

acting as if i dont take them to heart.

XXX is this

XXX is that

its all a bunch of nonsense in the end.

you tell me to stop drinking, stop smoking

i consider it thrice

giving it chances

i feel like i never change.

you calm me down

saying how i deserve to live

its something i could almost believe.

Her piling up lies

his non-existent self respect,

it all comes crumbling down in the end.

XXX is this 

XXX is that

without noticing im.

when they beat me down

you gave me life.

when they cut me up 

you cleaned the wounds.

purposeful or not.

i cant help but wonder.

‘that jealous- self serving- selfish zealot’

‘the one they always wanted.’

wouldnt you know all about it?

after all. 

they miss you.

they hate me. 

XXX is this

XXX is that

I dont need reassurance from the dead

acting like XXX is-

you dont know -

i watched you question over and over again.

“Who are you” 

repeated more everytime.

XXX isnt this

XXX doesnt know you

that name.

isnt yours to hold onto.

I cant help but wonder, do you care?

[hoshi9zoe]

hi,

(if you dont wanna read all this thats fair in that case i just hope you have a good day)

i dont know you and i dont wanna bother you, but i saw your reblog of the post about being scared of trans women, and i just wanted to say that its not always gonna be like that. im younger than you and i dont wanna be lecturing a person with more experience than i have, but reading what you wrote made me concerned. at the same time it is exactly what goes through my head sometimes.

i know i cant fully understand your struggles, because im trans in the other direction, but im starting to think its unfortunately true for all the people who are seen as something theyre not - right now we really have to accept there are our kinds of people and we cant change the rest. you absolutely deserve a better world in which people dont see you as dangerous just because you exist but in the meantime you need to remember your whole life isnt defined only by the people who hate you or are scared of you. it still absolutely sucks that people are intimidated by you just existing, and it shouldnt be like this and i can only imagine how lonely it could make someone feel. none of it is fair, but you can and should try to be happy anyways.

i try to think about it like we got the short end of the stick, but that doesnt mean we should break it and throw it away. it really is shit but (as cheesy as it sounds) we only get one chance at living, and as much as itd be understandable to do so, we cant spend it thinking about how unfair it is.

remember that there will be people who will see you as a person and not as a danger. it might feel like theres few of them, or they dont exist, but they do, and hopefully you get to spend more time with them than you ever will have to spend with the people who are transphobic.

i personally still cant accept it but its the advice a friend of mine gave me (though it was in the context of me being autistic) and i do think its smart even if not groundbreaking. i have trouble applying it to myself, so i might be hypocritical and/or projecting, i apologise for that. still i wanted to share it because i dont think theres any better option for us. im really sorry you feel that way and i hope we both get better at focusing on the people who can see us as people

ps well this is bible length im sorry and also sorry if its rude? i really didnt want to come off as condescending or like i was assuming you dont know any of this so i hope i at least managed that (and i sincerely apologise for my punctuation. )

I still can't wrap my mind around the fact that because of my depressive ass comments on a post people are trying to comfort me and cheer me up. I've done nothing to deserve this kindness and while I think that this kindness and your time is wasted on me, i'm grateful non the less. don't worry about coming across as lecturing me. you're just sharing your thoughts and feelings on that matter and I don't mind. even tho i may be older than you, I absolutely do not have more experience than others. less even probably... and I did not want to make you or anyone else concerned about me. as i said that's absolutely wasted on me. it's just me trying to somehow vent my depression so that I don't do something more harmful. it is just irrevocably true that trans women that are not thin, white, effeminate, with clear skin and no body hair will be seen as dangerous and intimidating by afab people and especially cis women. But i'm grateful that you with for a better world where that isn't happening. It's admirable. And I don't want to spoil your positive message but it's gonna be hard to keep my depression about that in check and I wanna apologize in advance for probably still being very negative about that. You are correct that my life isn't defined by those that are scared of me, but they still can affect it in a profound way even if I try to ignore them. And yes it is incredibly lonely, but I've already been lonely before I came out so there's not much of a difference. Just maybe a new flavor.

I'm just gonna skip the next paragraph with the short end of the stick so that I don't let my depression speak my mind and just rip all of that to shreds. You've got a nice mentality there and I don't wanna take that from you especially since you went out of your way to try and cheer me up. I know there are people that aren't scared. I'd like to meet some one day. But all deprecating jokes aside, I will always get reminded of it when I see how the trans community and especially trans women have their own separate isolated corner from the wider LGBTQ+ community. I'm not faulting you for struggling to apply the advice your give yourself. I really know a thing or twenty about that... Realistically I know that it's not as bad as my insecurities, depression, anxieties ect make it out to be. But acting on that; confronting your fears is exponentially harder. Especially if you have to do it alone because you're shit at meeting new people and making friends and very good at driving existing ones away. And please don't worry about grammar or punctuation or all that jazz. School makes a way bigger deal out of it than I feel is should be on the internet in casual situations. It's your intent and your feelings that matter not punctuation ^^'

[pepperminty-7]

One of the numerous things I love about my OTP trope is Brienne got her man. She doesnt even realised that Jaimie is her equal. Women in Westeros would definitely kill perhaps to get on his good and sexy side but sorry for them Jaimie found the woman of his dreams in Brienne.

And they dont even realised it. It is effing romantic. It is every Westeros man's loss for judgimg her through her looks because they never realised that Brienne has everything a man shoud ever want in a woman. It is their loss. Lucky Jaimie, the SOB arrogant man knows what he wants and he effing got it.

Fate brought these two together. Seven blessimgs to GRRM for creating them and giving life to the most beautiful romantic couple I have ever laid my eyes onto.

I contemplate on the unconventional beauty that is Brienne and truly beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. Her strenght and her heart are her armour and her ethereal qualities. Her loyalty and kindness are her weakness and her strenght in equal measure. But she utilised them wisely maybe not all the time but she comes close to perfection.

Jaimie is the ultimate man for Brienne because he understood her where no man or even a woman ever did. It took time because he is a slow learner but he realised his potential and his purpose on this earth but his demons got the better of him in the end which was so sad and tragic. But he was not to blame because D&D did him dirty and Nikolaj resigned attitude towards Jaimie was a bit political IMHO. But he has not got a choice on the matter Im afraid.

The ending was so tragic because Jaimie has not reached his full potential.

Everytime I think about it I am beyond awe that this gorgeous man from Westeros ( even men knew like that of Edmure Tulley noticed and acknowledge it in his face ) has found the truest of beauty and perhaps one of the most if not only in Brienne. His heart preceeded his uncanny qualities brought about by his dysfunctional upbringing and with time as their friend opened his eyes to the truth that Brienne is the most gorgeous woman in Westeros. And i.have to give credit to Nikolaj acting that was superb but perhaps partly he is a tad smitten by Gwen' s talent and looks in a professional way I guess. I assume it is a mixture of that. Gwen after all has this ethereal glow about her. She has this unconventional lovely face that not most people realised because they have their own standards of beauty which the industry unjustly upholds.

Brienne doesnt even have to change herself to change Jaimie's mind and heart. Everything just fell into place like nobody's business. Old gods and new are shipping them like crazy too. Because no other OTP deserve that storyline other than Brienne and Jaimie.

I should be grateful that they were given a chance to consummate their affections and unspoken love for each other which was a long time coming and long overdue. As said time and time again about their relationahips actions speaks louder than words. I am grateful I really am but it was unfairly done. It shoudlve been explored, doesnt have to be soft porn GOT kind of way. But perhaps them lying on that beautiful bed with Jaimie caressing her with kisses on her neck as both their hands clasp. Jaimie on top with alternating view of their faces. A bit of thrusting wouldnt hurt at that time would it.? The thing about this is why other major couples get their screentime while Brienne and Jaimie were given scraps. But luckily Nikolaj and Gwen gave their all on that part that sort of transcends on the screen. They made that scene golden for the die hard fans.

The way Nikolaj kissed Gwen was so authentic I can feel Jaimies longing for Brienne was so sexy, astounding and impressive. It portrays the deeper meaning of their first sexual encounter. Full of pent up emotions and hunger for one another brought about by their restricted enviornment and situation.

The way Gwen kissed him back was equally seductive and alluring. I can feel Brienne being herself who was willing to explore this strange unfamiliar ground in their relationship. Taking each other on that next level.

I for one was a bit disappointed with the editing. It was cut prematurely. Bad editing. I could sack them. I was wishfully thinking that there are more scenes hidden at the editing room securely guarded to be shown in the near future to drive the die hard fans crazy.

The kiss was so passionate it cant be just all that Ive got a feeling theres more to that scene that was cut due to time constraints.They sacrificed that pivotal moment for Dany and Jon scenes. I love Dany and Jon but not as a couple. I dont want to delve into that.

But yeah it was a let down because of the editing team. Amateur could do better than that.

Fans like me should just use our imaginations. Im grateful for all the die hard Braimie creators that my thirst have been quenched by arts and fanfiction. Seven blessings to people that matter in this world.

But most of all I am always grateful to Gwen and Nick for their ability to make use of what was given to them and transform them into the most beautiful relationship on screen. That is so rare few and far in between that comes once in a lifetime IMHO.

[askata]

okay wow hi

heres my take

matter or energy, it doesnt really matter. i go off the idea that it can only be recycled, not destroyed nor even created. whether thats true or not idc.

i like to think that we were physically once stars, or empty air, or soft and loving hands, or shards of glass from broken bottles, or everything else.

i love you because you were stained glass windows and beautiful sunsets, but you were also broken skin and blood. youre everywhere, everything really. and i really love everything.

life is unfair too, but it doesnt mean to be. i think so often we wonder why life does this stuff to us, what we did to deserve bad things. theres no reason, really.

its like making a drink, or mowing the lawn, or watching the sunset. maybe the drink has too much something, or the lawmower blades werent spinning right, or the sunset wasnt as pretty as you thought it would be. sometimes, life doesnt go right, and sometimes that happens in big or personal ways.

life doesnt mean for your drink to taste off, or your lawnmower to stop working, or for the sunset to be like that, and thats okay. yeah, life is anthropomorphized far too much, i dont know if life marches for us or simply for the sake of marching, but it goes and goes regardless of our wellbeing.

outside of life and the universe in general, things dont really have a plan. things happen because time doesnt stop to protect us, and sometimes we bump and hit and smack into walls and tables because we keep moving.

it isnt your fault, its no ones fault. nothing is setting up a track for us to follow, we simply walk what we think we should, and sometimes that leads to bad places without us knowing. youre not responsible for how youre hurt, youre not responsible for tragedy.

i stopped shitting on myself because it felt like I was wasting precious time. this is the last year itll be 2024, there wont be a 2024 ever again, i plan to enjoy every minute i can until i count the seconds down to another unique year.

this is the last time youll live this exact date, or maybe the last time youll do something at that exact time, or the last thing youll read before bed. tomorrow is another day, but dont forget to cherish the moments that flow through your fingers.

it gets better, you just have to change your perspective a little bit and work on seeing the stuff in the shadows. you cant always focus on the spotlight and believe its the best you have.

its enough to breathe, that in itself is a miracle, and youre so precious for simply just existing. youre worth a life, and you deserve a good one.

and no matter what you do, someone will love you. someone out there would stick by your side until the end, the same way someone out there would hurt you for a laugh.

i love you, i love your bad habits, i love your laugh and your teeth, i love how you cope, i love the things you do that you hate, i love what you hate about yourself, i love you unconditionally. i love you, your doubt wont change that, i love you and your problems.

we always believe that people have the worst intentions because we worry so much about the people we see every day. some people youll meet might have bad intentions, but the internet (forgive me, i sound old for this) is full of negative talk and hateful people, and sometimes its so much we cant see what else is there.

yes im afraid of being hurt, but its so beautiful i have the chance to trust people. its so beautiful to even have the ability to fear or trust or feel betrayed. a moment doesnt last forever, it may feel horrible, but eventually youll get yourself a drink and you wont even think about what happened.

life is a river, live to prove them wrong, and remember that to be hateful is to be miserable. be the change you want to see, be the love and the goodness we doubt we have. i love you now, and now never ends.

i love you, my grain of sand, you are a beautiful piece of one big thing. dont let anyone trick you into thinking otherwise, not even yourself. sleep well, may the sun rise, and know, i will love you then, too.

i need to lovepost for a sec

[yellowbluemoonshine]

Noone Should Be Named As Villain for the Rest of Their Lifes

This line is so so fcking important. Not just for bnha but also other series and even such a good lesson for real life too.

Yeah people make mistakes, sometimes those mistakes are so messed up, a kind of mistakes hurted many many people, kind of mistake that crossed the line, unreturnable but even so, people's desire to change or their suffering means nothing?! Because we all can fall into despair very easiely, we all can make horrible decisions, we can be 'villain' in someone else's story but does that mean we always have to live our lifes like that?

You will see two general reactions to someone messing up. Whether they ignore the mistake and justify it or they will tell how awfull you are and justify every bad things happens to you and say "you deserve it".

Even in many so called redemption arcs, villain gets killed or to live his life as inferior to "hero" of story. People's idea of giving someone a chance is most of the time making that person as inferior. Like, villain, even after redemption can never be "good and pure" as hero because heroes never messed up, they were lucky enough to stay as "pure" so even villain try their best, even they actually feeling guilty, even they take full responsibility, they still somehow has to live their lifes as inferior. 

Yes, i am saying "luck", this is not me being ignoring people's effort to be better, this is me being empathizing people's pain and understanding that people can express their pain with destructive ways. That they act as awfull as hell because THEY ARE IN PAIN AND THEY COULDNT HAVE A CHANCE TO LEARN TO COPE THIS TRAUMA WITH HEALTHY WAY.

Yes, people might act as awfull but when they realize it, when they really geniuely want to be kind person, should their titles and awfull past  always hunt them down? That they can never actually seen as "good person"? Do they not deserves to be loved and live normal life?

Yeah, this is how Deku acts, he is not one of those "kind" main characters who shows superficial empathy to the people he reach out.

Deku understand himself, his own suffering, his own flaws, his dark sides and he accepts that that part of him is exist. He knows that he is lucky enough to not fall into "villain path" and he just looks at Aoyama and see him as person too. He doesnt looking down on him for messing up. He just reach out to him with pure empathy, noticing that Aoyama's goodness and telling him that he can still be hero.

This is what actually giving a new chance to change to be better means. Deku is starting to understand that he can be easiely in Aoyama's place and instead of ignoring the fact that he was lucky enough to not messing up like most people do, he just puts himself and Aoyama on same place, that they both can be equally good, that they both can be heroes, despite him not making the same mistakes Aoyama did.

This kind of mindset that will save villains like Shigaraki, Toga, Dabi too. Yeah, they made horrible things but if anyone who desire to be kind person, anyone who geniuely wants to change, anyone who desire to take responsibility, anyone who actually feels guilty, they deserves to be happy, have normal lifes, they shouldnt be called as villain for the Rest of Their lifes because their suffering and effort for changing matters. Because yknow what? Awfull people dont change. (Not saying that anyone who dont change is awfull cause its not that simple but anyone who actually does the things i mentioned is definitely not awfull. ). Being"kind/good" doesnt mean always stay as pure, it means doing your best to be better person, its effort for changing, thats the point.

And btw, Spinner taking care of Shiggy was cute ^^.

(I am sick and should resting rn, but get excited after seeing Deku's speech and get up to write this meta. I AM ON FIRE NOW. I know that Deku still didnt reach that point, he still has way to go but this is such an important point and people should really take a lesson from it. I especially calling out other authors for this.)

Yeah, Deku is main character so of course, he would reach out to Aoyama with this idea but i never thought it will be this important. Its amazing, This is why he is my favorite character with Shigaraki. :))). If you think that i am overreacting, you are wrong cause i am sick of hyprocy of stories. Finally a character said this. Deku is amazing.

[bridgyrose]

y...ellow fellow - whiterose, but it only affects Ruby

“I dont want to be the bee’s knees, I just want to be a regular girl with regular knees.” Ruby slumped down into her seat on the airship as she watched the city of Vale move below her. A small frown crossed her lips as her vision started to go red once again. “Besides, we all know its a fluke that I’m here. I mean, I’m excited to start, but I was at the wrong place at the right time.” 

“And you deserve to be here just like everyone else,” Yang said as she sat down next to her sister. “Besides, you know its not a fluke. You’re a talented huntress in training and you nearly caught a criminal on your own. If that doesnt say you deserve to be here, I dont know what does.” 

“Doesnt change the fact that I’ll be at least two years younger than everyone here. Or that none of my friends will be here with me. I dont know anyone!” 

“And there wouldnt be a guarantee that you’d know anyone in a couple years either. The entrance exam was brutal and people fail it all the time.” 

Ruby let out a sigh as her vision started to tint from red to green. “Yeah, but I’d have a better chance of knowing someone when my friends were ready to come as well.” 

Yang put a gentle hand on Ruby’s shoulder and smiled at her. “Look, all I’m saying is that maybe this is life telling you that you absolutely need to be here now. Mom always said you were destined for something important.” 

“Not that again…” Ruby rolled her eyes and pulled out her scroll to look through it. “I dont want to be important, I just want to be a huntress and help those that cant help themselves. Maybe become a hero, but I… I dont know if I actually want to be enough like mom to be like that.” 

“Why not? You’ve always wanted to be like her.” 

“Yeah but…” Ruby let out a sigh and put her scroll down. “What if being like her means disappearing like she did?” 

“I wouldnt worry too much about that.” Yang smiled and stood up as the airship started to dock at a cliffside overlook of the Emerald Forest. “You’re talented already and you’ll have me backing you up. With the two of us working together, what could possibly go wrong?” 

“Does that mean you want to be on the same team as me?” 

“Actually…” Yang gave a small smile as her friends walked past. “I’m going to go hang out with my friends! Catch you later sis!” 

“Wait Yang dont leave-” Ruby reached out to Yang and put her hand down once her sister was out of sight. “-me.” 

Ruby let out a sigh of frustration and walked off the airship as her vision started to clear up and a breeze from over the forest picked up around her. She paused for a moment as she looked at the trees around her, amazed by the colors she had never seen before. A smile crossed her lips just before she felt another student bump into her, bringing the much familiar sound and feel of a dust explosion. Smoke, fire, ice, and lightning billowed around her as she found herself on the ground, her ears rang but still managed to pick up the sound of another girl yelling at her. 

“You dolt! Watch where you’re going!” 

Ruby coughed and waved a bit of dust and smoke away from her face as she picked herself up. “I did stop and move out of the way for a moment.” Once the smoke and dust were finally out of her eyes, she stared at the girl in front of her. “But I’m Ruby-” 

“I dont care who you are,” Weiss said as she started to pick up the rest of her dust off the ground. “All I care about is that you stay out of my way. Do you even know who I am?” 

Before Ruby could give her answer, she heard another voice from behind her. 

“Weiss Schnee, heiress of the Schnee Dust Company.” Blake walked past the two girls, eyes still buried in her books. “The same company that abuses the faunus they employ.” 

“Those are just rumors spread by the White Fang!” Weiss retorted angrily. “You cant believe anything those terrorists say.” 

“Rumors or not, your father’s company still does nothing to refute those claims.” 

“There’s nothing to refute when the claims come from the same group that wishes to destroy everything the SDC uses to bring dust to every corner of Remnant!” 

Ruby watched the two walk off and her vision started to tint to red again. She took a step forward to follow, though she paused to process everything that happened. Between seeing the world as it should be and the dust explosion, she wasnt entirely sure if what happened was real or the result of hitting her head. After a few moments to realize that everything that happened was real, she started to walk forward again to follow Blake and Weiss, a smile crossed her lips as she spoke to herself in a quiet whisper. 

“I think I just found the reason life wants me here.”

[jackassbroadcast]

Hello im a Tommy enthusiast who watched that one stream where he monologued to foolish for like hafe an hour bc i heard it was a cool stream or wtv to realize how much amazing character moments it had that barly anyone in this damn fandom is talking about so ill fucking do it

(Only after finishing this i realized i wrote 1.7k words LOL OOPS)

If u dont know what in talking about its this stream (apologies for linking a clips channel the actual vod on foolish's channel is deleted by now)

Also heads up /rp /dsmp every time i refer to someone here by name is their character unless stated otherwise bc writing c! Before every name Is tiring LOL

Also // suicidal idealization , death mentions

The conversation starts off with foolish and tommy mining for Wilbur, and foolish questions how simply mining will solve the problem to which Tommy reponds with "they dont get solved, do they? It just ends uo with some madman screaming 'Hes solved it!' And now look at him." And how he wants to "prevent the problem before it goes outta hand" something that clearly references Wilbur and his destruction of lmanburg, which paired with him collecting stone for Wilbur as the way to stop said problems he believes if he does anything he can for Wilbur and support him by his side enough this time around, that he wont do anything like thay again, which as im writing this makes be realize by doing that we learn hes blaming himself for what happened to Wilbur in November 16th and pogtopia and a whole, by not being enough for Wilbur in his mind.

The conversation continues, foolish off hand asks why would tommy want to stop Wilbur? Weren't they friends at some point? To which tommy leads foolish to lmanburg and tells him the story of the nation (how it was him and Wilbur's nation, how they made it to espace dream's iron fist and how they held an election "which puts your life on the line, which is good- if you're confident but- perhaps we were too confident", how they lost)

Tommy: "You know the phrase: 'treat other how you wanna be treated', foolish? People dont ever listen to it. Wilbur- he decided he wanted to be treated poorly so he treated everyone around him poorly "

This Tommy quote, to me at least, so so amazingly strong in conveying how understanding he is? To the world around him. Like-

I have not seen one person bring this quote up, and yet its (at least to me) shows such growth and understanding in Tommy i saw little to nothing like it in other streams. It shows he understands, he knew Wilbur didnt change just because, he knows he was struggling, that he thought everyone around him were againt him, were going to abandon him the first chance theyll get- and he thought he deserved it. So he, as a last way to defend himself against that, hurt them first, abandoned them first, so theyll see how much of a 'bad' person he was and take him out- and tommy saw right through that, possibly understanding it more after exile.

This next qoute was talked about much more but i still wanna bring it up

Foolish: "Do you believe in second chances?"

Tommy: "Oh, no I don't really believe that its not really a thing for me foolish its just that-" *sigh* "- i believe everyone has a little bit of good in then and this is not about giving him a second chance or a third chance- its not about *chances* foolish. Its about not giving up on the poeple you care about. "

Which. I mean. I dont know how healthy that mindset is, but comign from Tommy it makes so much sense.

Techno, tubbo, eret, sapnap. These are all people Tommy used to be extremely close to, had either a war or had been betrayed by them, and yet still found it in his heart that he still cares for them, with all of these, they did horrendous things, that hurt tommy physically and mentally, while also not being once or twice, but a contentious thing, but while tommy is to this day still effected by their actions he still found it in himself to forgive, because he knows he fucked up too, a lot, and he knoes they learned from their mistakes just as he had (except c!techno FUCKKK c!techno mf doesnt learn SHITTT) and he knows, when the time comes he knows hed want the people he hurt to forgive him too. (And he wants Wilbur to do the same)

Next qoute i will cut to a couple parts because its really so good and full of character i had to bro

Foolish: "Do you consider yourself to be the good guy or the bad guy?"

Tommy: "It really depends who you ask, isn't it? Yknow? If you asked dream he'd say im *his little toy that he plays with* you know? It doesnt.."

This part really stunned me when i first heard it because, and correct me If im wrong, but i dont think tommy ever acknowledged how dream sees him, and  how right he has his viewpoint too. Just the fact tommy is so *painfully* aware of how dream doesnt even see him as a person anymore but just a toy to mess around with for a while than just throw it away when it get too boring really hurt me. Someone give this kid a hug

(Continued) Tommy: "...foolish, honestly? I used to consider myself 'the good guy', you know? The fuckin'- second in command! But these past- these past like six months or so, foolish, everything got so much harder than it was before. Because before it was just us vs bad guys, it was all so clear! But- its not been 'clear' for so long, right? It wasn't; 'these are the bad guys! These are the good guys!' Now it's : 'he's doing this and it makes him a bit worse-' i mean, it all got so complicated, so- i don't know. Depends who you ask."

He says this, in response to foolish asking if hes a good guy- but its awfully similar to if Wilbur asked him if they were the bad guys. Because foolish just asked about him, and yet in his answer tommy made sure to keep using the words "us, he's, guys" as if hes not really talking about himself, as if hes explaining how Wilbur was wrong. Which he was. Also something interesting ive noticed, he says "the last 6 months or so", which indicated that with Wilbur he knew better to follow his word and leadership- with Wilbur he was always on the right side but when he lost him he felt much more lost alone, and couldn't trust himself enough to be on the "right side" .

Foolish: "I dont know, it all seems strange because just from, you know- hearing from others and, you know, learing a little bit, its seems like you've been the hero, you've been the villain, the conqueror, the savior, and, even now, i have no idea what you exactly are."

Tommy: "that's up to you to decide, isn't it? Im just- *uh*  i dont know. These days, foolish, I'm a little weaker than i used to be"

Foolish couldn't be more right with what he said, another example of this we see where a character acknowledges tommy never sticks to one thing us Charlie when calling him "tommy fron nowhere" which shows more how he cant stick to one thing, during the course of him on the server he had been friends and enemy with nearly everyone, been on pretty much all sides, and while never really intentionally, being in the center of conflict. When foolish says he doesnt know who tommy is anymroe at this point and all Tommy says in return is that "hes a little weaker than he used to be" does to show he misses who he used to be, with lmanburg, with Wilbur, when he knew who he was, now he doesn't know who he is anymore, but still so desperately want to be more demonstrated by the lines coming rigth after that one:

(Continued) Tommy: "..I'm not- I'm now who i want to be, but-"

Foolish: "Being honest with you, Tommy, that's the same case for me as well."

Tommy: "...heres the thing, foolish, unlike you i dont really have a choice. I have to try and be who i want to be, because if i dont, very bad things are gonna happen in this server. And now that Wilbur's back i can't- quite frankly *no one* can risk that. So i dont really have a choice."

Tommy want's to change- he wants to be better than he is now, to be closer to who he used to be, no matter how impossible that might be, but he also sees it as an immediate thing, he wants to change now, or asap, which is why hes collecting stone for Wilbur in the first place- old him would've done that with ease just because Wilbur asked and he wants to have that back so badly, asap. The way he talked about this reminded me of when he tried getting over his trauma stream before he went in the prison to kill dream: he knew he wasnt the best but he tried getting over that asap to go kill dream asap. He didnt wanna take the long road of years of healing and instead thought he could get over it just like that, and that experience clearly didnt teach him anything because now hes trying to slide back to the relationship he and Wilbur used to have and ignoring the drastic changes they both had plus the bad moments that were the reason they feel out in the first place, or maybe he knows, but at this point, after everything that happened to him and the server, he doesnt care anymore? He knows hes not the same he was and he'll never be the same, because thats not how it works, but his mentor, president, big brother is back after so long tommy felt so lost and alone he thinks maybe, this time around, with Wilbur, he could try and be better again.

[twisted-leader-of-something]

I dont exactly know what theme is Yana going into with Twisted Wonderland, I know it sets place in a Twisted World a Villain's world but neither of the characters we meet are down to the core villains, but just flawed people who are finding their way in a harsh world full of judgements, prejudism and other issues. Yana said that this isnt even a tale of forgiveness or salvation, but to me, these people deserve to at least have a second chance to find their own happy ending

Continuation 1: To have their own happy ending than having the same fate as the villains they are based on. Yana explained that the concept of Overblot are those people who underwent such negativity that they are willing to throw away their morality just so they could get what they want, but they have become the villain they are meant to be. I couldnt say the others were innocent, many can be just as selfish as those who overblot.

Continuation 2: But eventually, they have learn many lessons through that experience that may help them grow or change little by little. But It doesnt mean they get to change their way that makes them for what they are, you cant force them to be good like those RSA people, and it makes sense because its what human nature is. The NRC boys can change for the better but theyre still the same person we knew. Everyone deserves a happy ending, as long as they freed from their cage and start a new.

Ah! While I would like evidence of Yana's post about this, mostly just so I can confirm it's true (I don't want myself to get false hope when it was never there and also to confirm I'm not misinterpreting something about the post)

But, you know what, I respect that from Yana to do. 

Redemption is kinda of a really, really hard thing to pull of correctly, and even then, it's up to interpretation if a person became good. There’s a lot of ways that someone’s redemption can be interpreted, and what feels like redemption to you may not be the same to me. After all, a person’s redemption arc is basically subjective, since there's so many schools of thought as the to what truly is redemption for someone, and wither if a person’s even worthy of such depending on their past actions. Redemption isn’t a cookie-cutter thing that can happen to anyone and it just works, as much as society might want it to seem like it. 

But, there is something that I think we can all agree on: 

All of us deserve to be happy, and deserve a second chance at things. 

Life doesn’t always give us that, but we all do deserve a chance to change and grow as people and find our way in life. We’re not static beings. We need to grow and learn to find our way in life. Our past mistakes shouldn’t define us as people. 

While, yes, huge change is wanted by most because it makes things easier, that’s not how life works. Little changes that add up over time is what normally happens, because humans don’t suddenly change habits, personality or other things overnight. It take time to get to big things, which is why I’m often told to remember the little things, as they add up.

And, based on the fact the main cast we’re with are villains, I think having them change slowly over time is more reasonable than suddenly redeeming them. After all, they’ve still committed pretty offences, but they can grow and learn for it. In mean, I think these characters are prefect for slow change over time, since villains are kind of a strange archetype, that is actually quite fluid, after all, all that’s required to be a villain is that you’re the central problem of the story they are in. And, that alone can be interpreted in millions if not infinite amounts of ways because of the concept being so basic in nature. Villains are fluid in nature, as long as they are the problem of the story, it doesn’t really matter who, where, when, why, or how the person itself are the problem of the story. And, I think Yana might be exploring that. That villains are only really villains because they cause issues for the story, it might not even be because of who they are, or what they’ve been through in the past. Villains are mostly defined by an act they’ve done in a story, and that’s what they can only be known for. And, that’s dehumanizing, as they may have a reason behind what they did that might have been for a good reason. 

I maybe getting waaay into Yana’s motives here, but basically, I like her approach! 

[jajanvm-imbi]

Headcanons of Krel living on earth because he’s my favorite and I love him and I haven’t seen anyone do this yet so I feel like I have to

^^^^^because of this very moment I love the idea of Mary and Darci befriending Krel.

Since Aja,Vex and Eli went back to Akaridion-5, Mother was destroyed, and Claire was busy with Trollhunting stuff, earth gets pretty lonely. So Mary and Darci adopt him into their friend group. 

At first Krel was a little apprehensive to joining their friend group, but he quickly warmed up to it because, he, being Krel, loves the attention.

like I can totally see Mary and Darci taking Krel to like a mall or something and doing those like teen romcom movie shopping montages where he goes into a changing room and the girls judge the outfit until they find the perfect one.

I personally believe Krel would adopt a soft boy look, with like oversized button ups and t shirts tucked into jeans, but thats just me.

anyway, because he’s friends with Mary and Darci, Krel has a new found social popularity in Arcadia.

because of this, Krel would prolly get nominated for Spring Fling king and shit

I would say Krel wouldn’t really care about being nominated, but seeing how he cared so much about the science fair and the Battle of the Bands, he would definitely care

Steve is conflicted because he wants to be Spring Fling King, but he can’t mess with Krel like he did with Jim and Eli cause Krel is his girlfriend’s brother 

Krel notices this and takes advantage of it to mess with Steve and actually tries to win.

like Krel would just dominate the contests, and his theme presentation would be the flashiest and most appealing and people would just generally like him, and that would really worry Steve

like Krel, with four arms would be really good at the Touch-a-Truck-athon or whatever its called.

Krel would prolly let Steve win anyway because watching Steve squirm and freak out over prolly losing the crown and not being able to do anything about it cause he's Aja's brother is much better than any highschool dance crown

also the school 100% asks Krel to DJ future dances and events to save money, and Krel absolutely loves it

He would also definitely do the school play. Seeing how much he enjoyed being in Toby and Eli's short film, and again, he loves the attention, he would totally be down 

Also it would just be another chance to mess with Steve to be the lead. 

Because of this, Ms. Janeth would do another Shakespearean play, but do one of those modern renditions. Like it's the same play just in a modern setting, to take advantage of Krel's Akaridion form like they did with Jim's armor. 

If not in the play he would do stage crew/tech.

Like he would create elaborate settings for them using A5 tech and Ms. Janeth would adore it 

moving on, because home life is pretty lonely with just the Lucy and Ricky for company, Krel loves to host his friends for parties and sleepovers and whatever

and since Krel lives in the coolest house on the block, they love coming over

He hosts girl’s night every other week with Mary, Darci, and Clarie (becauuse she deserves a fucking break) 

since we’ve all agreed that Krel is 100% a gaylien, I love the idea that he casually comes out during a girls night

like Mary would be like “So Krel, are there any girls you like?” and Krel’s just like, “*snort* Girls? Who ever said I like girls?” and the others are like “….....?“ and Krel just rolls his eyes and says "I like boys, ladies” and they’re like “ooooohhhh, okay. Cool.”

So now they spend girls night talking about boys. Claire and Darci about their mans and Mary and Krel about cute boys.

One day the girls give Krel a little rainbow pin and Krel’s just like “what’s this?” And the girls tell him that it’s an earth symbol for the gays and he’s like “theres a symbol for that here? I didnt think it was that big of a deal. On A5 it’s pretty normal” and the girls explain why theres a symbol and he’s like “oh shoot wow, thanks" and he put it on his backpack.

He’s pretty confused the first time someone is homophobic towards him cause like that kind if behavior doesnt happen on A5 and hes just like, “why does this bother you? I hardly know you” and just brushes it off. Its doesnt really bother him, mainly cause he doesnt know the earth insults towards gay people so he doesn’t even realize, but if the girls (or Toby, or even Steve, too) catch anyone being homophobic towards their friend they will attack that asshole on sight. Especially Mary and Steve

Random person on the street: Ha, *slur*

Marry: WHAT DID YOU SAY TO HIM BITCH???

Krel: Marry its fine, it’s not that big of a dealoHSEKLOSANDGAYLENMARYGETOFFOFHIM

Marry: SAY IT AGAIN ASSHAT, I D A R E YOU

Claire and Darci: *trying to hold Mary back* maRY NO

Steve: THATS MY NINJA KICKING SPACE ANGEL GIRLFRIEND'S BROTHER BUTTSNACK I'LL END YOU

Toby: *now chasing after Steve to stop him* stEVE NO

Mary would 100% find out who the rando is and destroy their life on social media. Like she would leak their job, phone number, email, school/college (if applicable) to her thousands of followers and absolutely ruin them with no remorse. And honestly, good for her

Also whilst on the subject, Krel can not drive or cook for 2 reasons: 1. Hes gay and 2. He’s a prince so he’s never had to do either before

Like he can obviously do math but that’s it.

Proof? That one scene in Wizards when Douxie had him drive the airship. You know the one.

Coach Lawrence refuses to get in a car with him at Drivers Ed after the 3rd day Krel shows up.

Krel gets addicted to sugary coffee shop-esc drinks thanks to Darci. Not coffee cause we saw in 3Below Part 1 that he doesnt like coffee, but refreshers, coolattas, frappuccinos etc…? Definitely.

As for warm drinks, he’s more of a tea person.

Moving on

He face calls Aja everyday because he really misses her

He tells her all about school and his friends and whatever and Aja tells him about the changes she’s making to the A5 government

Thanks to the wormhole they visit each other often. Sometimes Steve tags along cause he misses his ninja kicking space queen angel girlfriend. (And Eli, but that's also for another post)

They take turns housing Luug.

Krel genuinely loves it on earth, but he hates the primitive technology so he begs Aja to send him supplies and materials for his projects. 

He would 10000% apply to HexTech for an after school job. Seeing his reaction to HT in Wizards and the fact that “Akaridion tech and magic are so compatible”, he would be the perfect addition to the HT staff. 

The Wizards wouldn’t be sure at first but after he shows them A5 tech and Douxie’s email of recommendation about the time loop thing they made together, the wizards are like “oh yeah we definitely keeping this kid. This is going to be so much fun.”

Their inventions become more and more extravagant because Krel can and he's just extra and the wizards love it.

He would definitely find a way to use magic using A5 tech. But he would have to study magic in order to figure out how, so the wizards help him learn all about magic. And since he's learned everything there is to learn about science and technology and whatever, he's super excited to learn about something completely different and interesting. The wizards are happy to teach him. He would be the first Akaridion to learn and use magic

Like he would make his own staff with his serrator and everything. He's like "earn a staff? Nah fuck that going to make my own"

Speaking of which he really likes human swear words. But he doesnt know when it is and isn't inappropriate to say these swear words so he's gotten in trouble a few times for swearing at the wrong time

For example:

Ms. Janeth: excuse me Mr. Tarron?

Krel: what the fuck do you want?

Everyone in the room: krEL NO

Anyway, back to Krel at HT, thanks to Toby, he would definitely have a bowl of candy in his little lab. More like multiple jars of different candy just scattered around the room. Small candy like fun sized chocolate and skittles and jelly beans and whatever

And a mini fridge, of course.

Steve, Toby and Arrrgh come over to the lab alot to mess around.

Toby has a lot of sci-fi requests for Krel to make

Toby: do you think you can make a shrink ray? Laser blasters? Invisible ray? My own hoverboard? My own serrator *gASP* WITH A WARHAMMER SETTING???? WITH SPACE ARMOR TO MATCH???!!!???!

Krel: Toby you already have a warhammer and armor why do you need more?

Toby: I dont have a space warhammer and armor Krel!!!!!!

Going back to school life, I feel like Krel would take an interest in Spanish class. I mean, his human form is latino and in Trollhunters (I'm pretty sure the lightning in a bottle episode) he said "Si" in response to a question someone asked him, so I feel like he would like to learn another human language. 

I also feel like he would just like to learn about Latin American culture in general since Mother gave him that form. He'd like to get in touch with his human self. 

Claire (when she isnt busy Trollhunting with Jim and the gang) is happy help him learn about Latin American culture and help him with his Spanish. 

Krel, being a fast learner, becomes fluent quickly with a perfect accent. 

Señor Uhl, who already liked the Tarrons to begin with, would really appreciate this. 

Claire's dad would also appreciate this.

Since he has such a fascination with human music, Krel would especially love Latin American music. Specifically reggaeton, since its kind of like techno music in a way and he already likes techno music.

And naturally, he learns to dance. All the styles of latin american dances. And he becomes quite the favorite on the dance floor.

He and Claire become great dance partners cause they both have the natural Latino rhythm and because Jim respects and trusts his girlfriend he doesnt mind them dancing together at parties and stuff

Although, Jim does ask for dance help at some point cause it looks like fun and he wants to dance with his beautiful talented incredible amazing gf and Krel is happy to teach him and anyone else who wants dance help. 

GUITAR LESSONS with Douxie cause in 3Below Krel said he really wanted to learn how to play guitar, steals Shannon’s guitar from the bonfire and is seen multiple times strumming it throughout the series. So of course this is included.

Toby introduces Krel to YouTube and Krel instantly makes his own channel.

of course his channel is called DJ Kleb and he posts his tracks and remixes. and maybe even some vlogs

its a little slow at first, only Arcadia Oaks students are subscribed to it but Mary blows it up by posting one of Krel’s tracks on her own social media and now he has thousands of subscribers

he also gained other forms of social media like Instagram and Tiktok, platforms to post his music

At this point every girl in school wants to be friends with Krel but not in the toxic GBF (gay best friend) way, girls just genuinely think he's 10x more interesting than every other boy in Arcadia Oaks

I think that's it for now sorry this is really long I just really love Krel and I had so many ideas. Feel free to add on!!

[generalexcuse]

Alright. I am beating a dead horse here but taking time off of this show and fandom did not work. This will be the last time I ever say something about it but it’s upsetting to me so I need to vent. And to everyone saying “You are an adult man and this is fiction, why are you so obsessed? Weirdo. Learn to differentiate between fiction and reality.” I am going to address these notions as well as other problems I am having here. But really, Inuyasha was one of my first Anime, I have many dear memories and especially Rin was one of my all time favourite characters. Seeing her being mistreated like this upsets me. Ofc it does because if you watch something in formative years it’s not just fiction like a boring sitcom you watch now. Shows and characters are important to people and to simply dismiss it like that even if they would have been equally upset if it wouldnt have become canon, is infuriating. Really this is just therapeutic for me because even after weeks it’s still so baffling to me. Also please excuse the grammar and spelling mistakes. I am not a native speaker.

So the problem is obviously Sessrin and how it’s done because while I absolutely dont agree with this pairing, it would have been fine if it wasnt like it is. 

In the original show, Rin is an 8 yo child and her entire character reflects just that. She behaves like a child and depends on others. She has also been traumatized, doesnt speak at the beginning of the show and dies twice. Both times she is saved by or because of Sesshomaru. In many ways, while she has survival skills on her own, she depends on his presence alone to keep danger away. He also leaves her with trustworthy humans at the end but stays in her life as a protector. Now I like the original dynamic. It’s sweet, innocent and both characters grow because of it. Rin can work through her traumatic experiences, learns to trust others and Sesshomaru becomes a better person.  What happens afterwards only happens offscreen right until Rin gives birth to his children at the crippling old age of 15. 15. My lil sis is 16 now and couldnt consent to something like that. And she is mature af. It’s ridiculous. My blood boils just typing that shit out. And if you give me the ‘it’s legal in Japan’ excuse. In Germany a 14 yo can be with a 20 yo sexually. Still not okay in societies eyes and on tv it’s never shown as something positive. It’s even explicitly forbidden for authority figures like teachers or protectors to be with their protégé before the age of 18 because the chances of even unintentional grooming are too high. 

Now lets take a quick break and discuss how this kind of relationship usually plays out in other fictional pieces. A minor with an adult is something that is being portrayed at times and I dont have a problem with that. The problem is how it’s being done in Yashahime. And I dont mean the nonexisting character development but the fact that even in adult fiction this type of relationship isnt depicted positively. And this show is for young adults and teens that will exist way after all the discourse as the official sequel to Inuyasha. A cult anime. Meaning that in the future young people will watch it. Just like many still watch Inuyasha to this day. It’s on Netflix for fucks sake. Just to preface what comes next.   Some people say, “But cant you differentiate between reality and fiction?!?!?!” Adults can but younger people havent developed this ability to the same extent.   What happened to Rin was statutory r*pe in the USA, illegal even in Germany and should have been depicted as such unless the showrunners and fandom are okay with watching it without criticism or deconstruction. At best it was done with the intention to please the fanbase but really it’s neglectful to anyother part of the present and future audience. Not even most Animes do that. And I get that Sessriners arent into that shit in real life and an adult show could have gone this route because the viewers understand and add the criticism in their heads. Not ideal but whatever to me. But a YA show to go this route is so wrong on so many levels. The younger viewer who will watch this show in the following years might subconsciously internalize that this is acceptable under certain conditions when it’s not criticized properly on the show. That lowers their alertness when an adult actually starts to groom them. How dense do you have to be to assume that the lack of criticism on this YA show is a good thing?? Not everyone who will ever watch this show is an adult or capable of the same reasoning.

But another thing: for the same reason r*pe isnt depicted in a positive light, these types of relationships arent either. Because it’s not a positive thing and most people and showrunners dont want to see or create it as positive. Even in adult fiction, even in other anime, the media critizes and deconstructs what it’s showing because normally the showmakers dont approve but show it for realisitc or dramatic reasons. the same sessrin storyline would fit a fucking horror or thriller series. Just change the music and show it all. No showmakers in their right mind would go “Aye we got a r*pe scene coming up, lets put romantic music and have a pink filter over it.” “But it’s a different time and culture!” People will say and I agree but to have the audacity to assume that back then it was okay or that in todays Japan it’s okay, is fucked up. Think about it for a second. That’s so fucked up to think. Even if the society back then or in Japan thinks it’s okay, does it make it okay? 15 yo girls werent able to consent to adults and bear their children back then. They had to. They were raised with the expectations and they simply grew up thinking that it was the normal thing. But that doesnt make it right. That’s just societal grooming which did not prepare them in any way or allowed them the human dignity that they would have deserved. To now act like it’s all cool to just show the “positive” aspects or to twist it into something positive is so fucked up. Child Brides are a fucked up concept and to portray it as anything else is fucked up and also undermines the experience many girls still have to make. period.

I heard people say that it’s okay to portray it in this way because “Sesshomaru is not human!!!1″ and that’s correct. He is not. BUT, it’s not about being human but about maturity, consens, and independency. Him being a yokai makes it worse imo because there is an obvious power discrepancy. But in this particular fiction a good relationship could have been established (Kagome and Inuyasha for example) on those foundations but they did not because I can only assume they wanted Sesshomaru to smash and the show to pick up at a point where the other characters arent too old to be cool.

“What’s with Sango and Miroku, Kagome and Inuyasha?? It’s the same!” No it’s not. Rin was 8 at the beginning of the show. Kagome was 15 and Sango was 16-17 when they met their significant others. If you now tell me that you think 8 to be comparable to 15-17, I must ask you to get a reality check. Kagome’s and Sango’s relationships were slowburns starting when they already were able to have sexual and romantical feelings. Rin was a child. And Kagome did not kiss Inuyasha until they knew each other for a long ass period of time and bonded as friends and maybe more. Sesshomaru and Rin never were friends in the same way that Kagome and Inuyasha were because the maturity levels are way off. No adult is friends with a little child in the same way they are friends with their adult friends. And normally you dont grow into such a friendship but in the rare case you do, it’s not when she is 15 but maybe 20 or 25. 

Last but not least, Rin is not a character to the audience the same way Kagome or Sango are. Why? Because she was never shown as an adult or 3 Dimensional character to the audience. We know her as a child who wants to be with her trusted group. She is naive, but tough and doesnt have any motivation or drive on her own outside her group. Like every child she clung to the adults around her and her world outside of this group was nonexisting. Kagome wanted to be successful in school, Sango was a demon hunter and wanted to find her brother. Those are motivations and traits that dont circle around the love interest. Rin never had those because she was not developed to that point. Because she was a child and her entire existence was to develop Sesshomaru and to perhaps give the viewer a character to simply adore. What we see is of her: Mistreated child, -> Dead child -> Child being looked after and healing, -> Child not being homeless anymore -> ????? -> Teenager getting knocked up, pumping out main characters and then getting yeeted into a tree. 

This is not the way you treat a beloved character. There is no dignity to her character. “But she is fictional!!1″ Yes she is. But please show me a show that treats its child characters like this without criticizing it. 

I would have loved to see her grow as her own person. Go on her own adventures or learning a craft or developing meaningful bonds with other characters her age. Forming ideas that dont revolve around Sesshomaru alone. You know her being 3 Dimentional and not just there to pump out main characters. And if she then with 20 or 25 met Sesshomaru again and thought he was the hottest shit, I would have been fine with it. Not happy but fine. But in the little time we saw her as ‘not a child’, she still behaved the way she did before.