#but thank u for being so nice about it!
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a redraw of the first drawing i posted here to celebrate the fact that ive been in tumblr for more than a whole year posting my shit and havent deleted my blog in panic yippee \:D/ (mushy rant in tags)
#i realised too late that it has been more than a fuking year (august 9)#and for context: ive had 3 different intagram art accounts and i deleted all 3 of them a few months before creating them. anxiety amiright#here it has been so different bc people are so nice??? it has been a pretty plesant experience here w all of u really#im so glad to have found myself in such a wonderful part of the fandom and amazing mutuals that i never talk to bc im shit w texting#the atention has been overwhelming ngl. i have over 2000 followers which. holy fuck???#it doesnt feel like a real number and for my own sake im nnot gonna treat it as one#like i apreciate the support and ppl liking what i do but im not here to make number go big yk? im here to connect w other humans#and yall have been amazing humans ^^ thank u for all the wonderful tags and comments and the support overall#it has been so cool sharing my art and finding other artist whom i respect oh so very much. some of them even follow me back wtf#i hope to continue being here for as long as i can and keep growing as an artist and sharing that process with other without fear#also my amy redesign actually goes so hard idk why i forgot about it nxnfbcncb#sth#sonic fanart#sonic#amy rose#nov.aart#nov.junk
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messier doodle pages feat. mostly loop because i'm thinking about the body horror of it all... amongst other things.
... at least one of those things being. hey. unrelated to this doodle page. how many months was siffrin travelling with the party? It wasn't that many, right? How many loops would it take before they'd've been in the house longer than they had even been with them? Much to think about!
#i wasnt going to actually put these thoughts to paper but everyone has been very nice in my notes so i was encouraged :) thank u.#LONGER TAG RAMBLE BELOW THE ORGANISATIONAL TAGS. CLICK SEE ALL THANKS#in stars and time#isat fanart#isat spoilers#isat siffrin#isat loop#sifloop#isiloop#siffrin#isat#isat isabeau#isat bonnie#isat mirabelle#isat odile#lucabyteart#samdontlook#<- spoiler tag for my bestie dont PEEK#post a6 loop just rocking up and being supremely volatile and uncomfortable is what im here for. what if a guy could look so disquieted#anwyay. about the body horror of it all. SIMPLY PUT: I do not think loop is fully tangible in places.#especially not like. their head. i think that thing is impassable but not graspable or solid. i dont think it has much feeling either#the chest star being the same white is why im joking about it being intangible too but. thats also a Kaiba reference so#no blood no organs no nothing impermeable skin guy should be allowed to get frustrated about that. its fertile ground for thoughts#being punished for not valuing your body as a vessel for your Self enough by being reduced to nothing but is MEAN..... BIG FAN OF IT.....#anyway !!! kiss your local mouthless entity on the NECK!!! get CREATIVE! ! ! ! MUST I SUPPLY ALL THE NONSEXUAL INTIMACY IN THIS ECOSYSTEM??#UEAGH.#anyway odile would get on their collective asses so hard about the philosophical ramifications of this polycule. she'd tease them about it#also @ everyone who makes bonnie call loop 'lulu' i owe you my life.
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Entering new fandoms sometimes feels like coming home after being away for a long time
#personal#this is about hl#but applies generally if u relate#thanks for being so nice#always motivating to feel like my art is loved#even if im just drawing my fav blorbo over and over
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it's always been difficult for me to make new friends, and now that i'm almost 30 it seems just impossible. unless it's a 40yo geologist i know. then it all goes back to the childhood method that always worked: "hey look at the cool rock i just found"
#she likes my drawings :))#yippie#little human interactions make me happy when it's something simple#“hey it's a dog we've met on expedition!”#“i didn't know you drew him!”#“i found this rock i thought u might like it”#also being genuinely interested about something the other person likes is really nice when it's mutual#like hey tell me everything about this boring mineral and i'll tell u everything about those new pencils i use#i am SO.#starved of normal nice interactions with people OUTSIDE !!!! OF WORK !!!!!!!!!!!!!!#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#thanks
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Might be a hot take as a bkdk and tgck truther here, but I find izuocha endlessly fascinating, beautiful, but also tearfully tragic.
I see their love for each other as something representative of their innocence and naivety when they only knew so little about who they were, and what was to come.
I think the main barrier of their relationship is that its rooted in how they see each other very idealistically, specifically that they're attached to the image of their Best Heroic Selves, and not the deeply selfish, destructive, freaky, and egotistical parts of them. To each other, they need to keep fulfilling that image or else that same person they looked up to would almost die in front of them, and that would be too cruel. Although that hero is still there, that same person they looked up to is not the same now because of...well...everything.
Izuku had barely even talked to girls when he first met her. She was Izuku's first ever real friend (Sorry Kats, everyone and him knows he was terrible), so he saved her in that entrance exam even if it was so dangerous. She gave a new meaning to his derogatory nickname just by being a friend that believed in him. After that, she saved him several more times (Blackwhip and Megaphone are the biggest samples iirc). It makes perfect sense that she is Deku's hero.
Ochako hardly knew what it meant to be a hero when she first got into UA. Just by reaching out to some kid tripping, she made a new friend who would then save her in that exam, then save him again in return. This boy then became someone who was always working so hard to save everyone in trouble, and she realized she wanted to be just like him too. "I want to save people"
But...Deku changes. The weight of One for All is on his shoulders and he needs someone to carry this burden with him. He continues to want to save other people at the expense of himself, still not letting his true selfishness and ego ever show- and it only grows more and more unbearable.
Then...Ochako fell in love with Himiko. Truly, relentlessly, selfishly and devotedly in love with a girl who then dies giving her blood to her- the greatest expression of love Himiko could ever give.
Not that they can't love each other because of this happening (and...so many other things oh god), I'm honestly not sure how to explain it- But them ending up together after losing that innocence and naivety? After Ochako will forever grieve the girl who showed her love in its most beautiful and ugly form? After Izuku changed so fundamentally as a person that the butterflies of a nice girl talking to you doesn't exist anymore? After that simple image of being a hero and being in love has completely changed for them both?
Even so, I believe they still love each other. There is no label I know of that can properly describe them though. They are each other's image of being a hero when it comes to saving people. Aside from Shoto, no one else can grasp the grief of the person you tried to save dying in your hands. They would no doubt try to cope with these losses together, and just try to get better together...but so much has changed. They've changed. The world changed. What are they now? Who are they now?
"What happened...to us?"
#I just think the tragedy of falling out of love for the person who represents who they Used to be is so...so painful#Kacchan isn't even here yet and it's already so complicated.#also. Izch healing together after all this would also be really nice#if u like them ending up together thats also perfectly fine too. im just a bkdk and tgck truther myself. thats kinda my whole thing#but izch forming a deep bond from their experiences and saving eachother#and maybe later on trying to date too...oh boy#and them being able to just...be more casual again. talk abt their lives and dreams together too just so they know they have each other#oh itd be so healing and beautiful#im so glad izuku talked to ochako on that cliff man oh man...#izuocha the underrated tragic love that they could've been if ppl werent so close minded abt them#only the real izch fans understand just how much these two actually mean to each other. god bless yall I swear even if I dont ship ship it#thank u to that person who wrote abt them being characters than run in parallel#that narrative structure for them is permanently in my brain. I love these two so much its no joke#my Extra hot take is that izch wouldve been treated better by the fandom if it was gay.#but we'd still agree on bkdk as the endgame after all that happened. maybe. idk this is a hypothetical.#if you switch ock and kats genders...this wouldve been a very different story and fandom. insane food for thought with this one.#ok thats my yap for the night oh god i have so many feelings about them...#evelynpr bnha#bnha#mha#my hero academia#izuocha#actually confidently putting this tag now. sorry for the angst you guys...and maybe being seen as a traitor#im a strong girl I could take on potential haters hahaha...#izuku midoriya#ochako uraraka
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a collection of all the doodles of purple and peachy i was brave enough to post at the moment. more coming soon!
i put the dates on each image to explain how inconsistently i draw them (and to make myself feel better about it.) my art has definitely gone through some growing pains over the past year--i've never been able to improve at drawing humans until now. i have been possessed by the power of women
(the cute little drawings near the top of the fifth image were done by my dear friend cuteosphere! these two wouldn't be nearly as developed without their encouragement.)
#btw purple isn't sad in that last comic. she's emotional about beetles#the most important thing to know about their dynamic is that Both Of Them Are Stupid#splatoon#my art#purple and peachy#long post#im being so brave by posting one of my incredibly scratchy sketches please be nice to me. thank u
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Holding out hope that the writing in veilguard will get more bearable but rook saying to lucanis that it's "not nice that Spite hurt him" and he "shouldn't accept that it’s fine bc it wouldn't be ok if a person did that" like. That is a demon. Built off a single emotion called SPITE. Rook I am finding it really hard to believe that u have lived in thedas for more than 30 seconds.
#wow the demons which are one of the consistently evil forces in these games did something bad#hey players do you know that that was not nice#ok thank you. do u think I am 4#dav spoilers#veilguard spoilers#dragon age the veilguard#also grinding my gears that everyone (including dalish elves???) just immediately accept the evanuris are evil/have come back#like the first person to not immediately believe it is the first warden and honestly he is the only character so far I respect#like maybe if this was like inquisition and a huge hole in the sky/rifts opened everywhere#but it seems like nothing like that happened but everyone somehow magically knows about the ritual and instantly believes everything rook sa#the more I think about these things the more annoyed I get#guys did you know being a leader means u sometimes need to make hard decisions... varric taught me that in my ma15+ game#i am enjoying the combat at least lol and I like Bellara and want to see Babylon so I'm in it for the long haul#why does everyone have a gun to their head making them nice though like it's so painfully out of place sometimes#and being able to only say the same thing but in a slightly boring slightly funny or slightly serious way is driving me insane#like I seem to be the only one who had no problem w the limits on dialogue in inquisition but this is driving me insane#Mourn watch rook what if you were somehow boring and nice. yay thank you bioware#ALSO rook stop talking and forming opinions without me getting to choose what u say like no I don't want u to day we have to save that perso#ok I swear I'm done now.. I need to go back to writing my thesis instead of grinding my teeth about this game#this is all coming from an inquisition enjoyer as well (sorry) but like so far I have found nothing I enjoyed about inquisition in this game#maybe if the inquisitor and Ghilan'nain are cool latee on I can focus on that (big maybe)#I am only early on still (just met first warden) so there is still time... i guess..
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RamKing + Venus Flytrap || by kinnbig
#HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO VENUS FLYTRAP ON AO3!!! Happy 1 Year of fic posting to my very cool and very smart and very talented wife!!!#My Engineer#RamKing#Perth Nakhun#Lay Talay#KingRam#tumblr user kinnbig hiiiiiii#ram myen#king myen#myen#bee.gif#we are SO BACK babyyyyy#if you havent read it!!! go do that now!!!!! please!!! its just!!! lovely!!!!!! and perfect!!! and linked in the description hehe#Your mission should you choose to accept - is to gently bully darcey into finishing the rest of that series#by leaving soooo many nice comments on the fic that she has to complete it hehehe#also big thank u Rissa tumblr user divorcedmalewife for being so so niceys about my idea and being the bestest sounding board hehe#I suffered more than god to get the colouring lookin pretty on these bad boys but OH it was worth it!!!#it's what ramking and my lovely wife DESERVE <3#also did anyone notice the photo frame and ram and king staying saturated in the photo frame while everyone around them fades??? did you???#do u see the visual metaphor of it all#do u understand#I'm insane about them forever thanks for asking#I love themb#flashing gif cw#lgbtedit#thai bl#thai bl edit#ql edit
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not to mention the entire antaam fleet like 😭 that was the PERFECT moment to show off what the lords could do!!! The antaam fucked over rivain, theyve been a thorn in the whole nations side for a long time now, they would not pass up a chance for payback via full scale naval warfare so that the veilguard can do what they need to!! Sure dreadnoughts are dangerous but at this point they probably have tricks up their sleeve, thats one of the few things they have!
also wouldn't it be personal because does solas not try to blow up kont-aar because he's trying to 5d chess tevinter and the qunari into destroying each other. like. i know technically this would not be incredible widespread news because the attack was stopped, but i don't think the wonderful citizens of kont-aar would have missed the tsunami that nearly hit them and the shockwave that actually hit them. rumors go around. and i assume irian/vadis tell varric. who i think would tell isabela. who would tell the group she leads. who would care because ofc, they LIVE IN RIVAIN, and now know that solas and his followers thinks they can trade rivaini lives* to further his plans.
*while i also think there's probably a divide between kont-aar and the rest of the nation, it's one that the rivaini love to jump across and back over. an interesting comparison to be made here with most of rivain having similar sentiments towards dairsmuid and the chantry. like this is the country specifically mentioned to have a lot of citizens who follow the qun/are non-andrastian + it being MUCH more multicultural and accepting than other nations. any attack on rivain, even if it's a qunari settlement, would fan a lot of flames that solas cannot put out so the idea of trying to him taking multiple steps back because he didn't realise how intensely the qun/rivaini/lords would react is very fun for me. it would have been soo interesting for rivain to be a hub for efforts against solas because of how it's not influenced by andrastianism, how he (or his agents) specifically fucked them over, and (maddeningly for solas) also part of this resistance has spirits who willingly guide them against him. this could have even been a plot device where the door goes both ways and solas finds out rook's plans because he manages to eavesdrop through a seer or something.
and on the spirits. all the stuff where the mourn watch regularly communicates with spirits could have been done with rivain as well, and with different takes on being 'friendly' with spirits. iirc there's a spirit in the hall of valor which is so interesting but it's literally just there for flavour text. THERE'S A SPIRIT IN THE HALL OF VALOR THAT DOES NOTHING BESIDES LIKE. SAY HI. ??? bioware i would have liked to see more spirits and seers and the matriarchal pantheists you have talked about please. and also the idea of the peaceful qunari settlement being pushed to protect the country they are part of and what that means for them as qunari vs. rivaini. taash's storyline could have contributed to this . so A LOT less about choosing a side, more about how kont-aar has developed, changed, how rivain has influenced it and what it means to be qunari. not the qunari agents and fighters that we have seen, but their 'civillian' way of life in kont-aar.
complete waste not seeing any of established lore reflected in the lords of fortune or rivain because i stupidly actually thought we were going to see some kind of settlement and be introduced to a very different cultural norms.. in my beautiful mind i like to think taash is a little taken aback by how badly mages/elves/etc are treated. like they understood it was different outside of rivain (they would have been young when the dairsmuid circle annulment happened right? so they don't 'remember' it themself, they likely heard others talking about it when they're old enough to understand) but until they actually saw what was happening first hand, they had a weird dissonance about it. but what we got was a deserted beach, ties to another faction (wardens are fine!! they are great !!!! the fourth blight is interesting!!!! yet they are not the faction with a lack of info about them!!!!!) and also the hall of valor that exists as flavor text with nothing meaningful behind it besides a pub used in a few cutscenes and a minigame.
#it's just hard to discuss the qunari in general when it is so obviously written to be quote unquote bad#and theyre like. in veilguard. really just reduced to being an invading force. which they were before. but there's literally nothing else#not a single character that explains more about the qun or how it operates + the game presenting choices about taash#that obviously lean towards favoring rivain. god knows why. its not like we know enough about it to choose it#even a quick peek into a rivaini lifestyle would have been helpful. all we know are from lorebooks !!!!#its actually like. 'qun would have made taash into a weapon/they are actively invading treviso/theyre working w ghil+el/shathaan' etc#and then on rivain's side the points are just 'umm. well the lords are super nice. and love freedom... and its also NOT qunari!'#there ARE reasons to pick rivain just none of them are in the fuck ass game. no one who doesnt read the books would know this shit#does anyone know why the antaam are acting outside of their orders. i dont rmb if this was explained or if its supposed to be like#a very severe response to solas and defying orders to 'deal' with a threat?#but god. kont-aar as it exists is so interesting. maybe elements of like .#'the main qun ignore the changes in kont-aar/rivain because it's such an important part of their trade' situation. idk#i just cant see a lot of the extremely rigid qun followings actually meshing with this extremely 'accepting' culture that is in rivain#eg. rivaini seers allowing possessions vs. sareebas#but its said that the rivaini pantheists actually have lots in common with the teachings of the qun (?)#and again. its peaceful. most of the issues that are mentioned in games/etc are to do with the ORLESIAN chantry causing issues in rivain#so it just. makes me think. maybe things have changed and there's a blind eye to whatever happens in kont-aar#or if there are more hostilities or issues caused by their differing beliefs then it would be good to fucking like. hear about it#plus the qun in general is just. worldbuilding standpoint is like. what. im not a guy who knows too much about this part of da lore so#i had to fact check a few things while writing this response and some of the answers were like#just so unbelievable that im choosing to do whatever i want#anyways. sorry. got out of hand. let me know if anything i said isnt true#its entirely possible. my knowledge of rivain is patchwork but this is probably to do with the fact there's not a lot. yeah#god. i have to stop talking now. thank u anon for agreeing w me. sorry u asked me about the lords and i took it as an excuse#to air out my issues w rivain. because tyche was partially built up around that and then none of it even mattered#veilguard spoilers#answered#rivain
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Hey everyone thank u all for being so kind about my silly Crowley art. Work has been kicking my ass lately so I don’t have much to offer however I do have
Alec with acrylics
I genuinely cannot stop making these they’re so fun and so stupid.
#he’s serving cunt!#I fear this is my new addiction#do y’all want more bc I am happy to do it#does this count as fan art???#also genuinely thank u all for being so nice on my last post#broadchurch#alec hardy#david tennant#someone ask me how i feel about alec hardy
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WHAT IS UR INSPIRATION FOR COLORS .............. do u have any specific things you focus on while coloring or is it a fuck around and find out kind of deal. im never NOT in awe of your beautiful and interesting color combos when your art comes on my dash, SO SO COOL!! thank you sm
thank you Too, i appreciate it 🧡💗 this is what i could squeeze out of my brain at the moment, as usual, general understanding of color theory really helps. now it seems i only operate on 'i like these colors' so i don't think i follow actual logic when coloring, but maybe you'll see it, i don't though. my color choices will probably change sooner or later so we'll see what happens. also talked abt colors back in june in dis post so maybe it'll be useful as well
helpful (?) autopsy performed on my art
#ask#someone else sent me an ask about colors as well not so long ago so it's for that person too; thank u for being nice 2💟
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the pics of morgan and joel are from travis sanheim's wedding this weekend!
^^^me experiencing the one-two knockout punch of “oh they WERE each other’s wedding date” followed by the realization that sanny finally got married 🥹😭 cheers indeed!!!
#have i ever told you all how i have the best anons in the world because i do. you’re all so nice to me and whenever i just. yell things#you come here and answer my questions and i love you for that thank you anon. i love you. 💕💕💕#also yes i KNOW i said finally and sanny’s like what twenty five however that is a) an old bachelor by most hockey standards b) he and alex#are high school sweethearts/been together forever and are disgustingly in love thank you they’ve been married in spirit if not reality#for years now. this has no bearing on my actual personal opinions on when you should or if you should be married or how long it should take#anyway. truly deeply madly obsessed with the joel/morgan of it all now because did they have to conform to a blue suit theme and if so#joelle why were u not wearing a belt. were all the flyers in blue suit uniform because that’s what our beautiful sensible sanny could trust#them to do &if so which ones were at the wedding i WILL be investigating post-haste. i have to update my tags 1st bc i’m the future me rn#who is currently dealing with them potentially being matching wedding dates & dunking my head in tinfoil to say morgan broke up with his gf#and ohhhhh if i don’t have a five weddings fic floating around SOMEWHERE for them. god knows i have the comment marriage fic AND fantastic!#liv in the replies#travis sanheim#<- in spirit i guess because it’s about his wedding so i felt like he should be included#philadelphia flyers#joel farabee#morgan frost#<- for my own sorting purposes#ANYWAY CONGRATS SANNY HAPPY MARRIAGE WE <3 U (do have to mention that i laugh so hard every time about that post calling him a rpf void i-)#also also bc i keep adding p.s. to this i was very pleased with myself to have flat fuck tk in the reply so that the travii were present 🫶
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another one +uncolored ver (can u tell i skipped school today
#i feel like it kind of looks better uncolored idk i think it's the eyes#laurmau#aphmau#mcd#minecraft diaries#i b on that danny gonzalez grind im CONSTANTLY rewatching his stuff im so serioud#i had this phase back in like december january i forgot where i literally binge watched like at least 12 of his vids a day Idk what i was d#ing like girl STUDY FOR YOUR SATS#hashtag Laurmau forever Idgaf (i've been avoiding continuing my mcd rewatchbc the next episode has aaron in the thumbnail(im really scared😭#I WILL FINISH YOU#Garroth soon contrary to popular belief i am a big Garroth fan too hes just kind of been irrelevant in mcd lately like come back......#I LIKE HIM KN THE SIDE STORIES THOUGH idk how i feel about my street but i Just started so we will see#o dont likr what jess is doing to him and laurance why are they crazy creeps☹️my daughters....#ummm what else omg i want to animate the nicole audio video thing that post is SO FUNNY literally live changing imma do that tmrw maybe umm#big emphasis on the Maybe😅😅😅i am a junior in high school#Hopefully ugghhhhh GET ME OUT!!!!#laurance zvahl#aphmau mcd#laurance mcd#awesome#also omg#thank u all for being nice tome on that laurance design it made me so happy like samn people rlly still care abt mcd😭😭(Positive
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no promises anymoooooreeeee i'll appear online when i appear online 😭 every time i say "ooh i think life is almost done being overwhelming!" it. becomes even more overwhelming in the dumbest ways. all i can manage rn when i'm not stressing myself into a shut-down state is staring at the wall while listening to youtube essays + mindlessly crocheting.
i might queue up ppls art and fics w/o commentary in the tags... i want other ppl to see what all of my cool friends have made, but i genuinely can't think right now with this monstrous brain fog. i'm really sorry, just. yeah. maybe i'll think of some way to make it up later!!! once the dust has settled!!!! but until then i wuv u and miss u. smiles.
[venting in tags including familial manipulation and ableism. i. didn't mean to write all of that, thiss was originally going to be a main blog post but. aaaaaAAAAAA!!!!!
also no need for replies or anything, i'd turn them off for just the one post if i could kjsndkn, i just needed to get things out and go eep jsjndsfdn ok bye bye bye bye!!!!]
#goddd my family finds it sooooooo funny that i can't do basic tasks! it's soooo funny that i can't even think of a horror movie to watch#on halloween bc i genuinely can't remember a single one right now. it's soooo funny that i can't take cardboard boxes or#old furniture out of my room without help bc i've physically and mentally and emotionally burnt out for Months.#and me not being able to move shit out after two (2) days makes me a hoarder somehow. and ofc hoarding is a moral failing#and my mom has to give me a stern talking-to about hoarding things... that were. again. in my room for 2 days....#[tbc it isnt a moral failing no matter the reason. life is hard and things happen and it can be hard to get rid of things for Reasons.]#nevermind them making constant snide remarks about me using ugly 'mismatched' desk / storage furniture. bc it was free / cheap? no income??#AND!!!!! i have a couple of new diagnoses. which doesn't change much day to day but it does make my family making fun of me#even more dumbfounding. like. this explains a lot of really scary unexplained symptoms that constantly leave me#housebound for weeks but uhhh haha hehe hoho??? so silly so funny that i'm barely conscious for multiple weeks???#and you can see that i'm getting worse but that makes it funnier??? hmm!!!#also nevermind that i've told them the exact reason why i've been like this (read: them) but that ALSO makes it funnier somehow.#but i also can't say shit bc they're doing something ~nice~ for me (out of convenience + after almost a decade of 'don't get comfortable'#and 'don't decorate this room bc it isn't yours' and 'you need to be ready to move out by x date'#only for the date to arrive and them to pull the 'i never said that. and if i did say it i didn't mean it like that.#and if i did mean it like that i don't anymore.' card. + any big renovations are things they wanted anyway. hmmmm!!#and how i have to do all of the phys labor alone bc if i ask for help i get made fun of!!! and yelled at that i'm doing things Wrong#(hint: i'm following instructions to the letter but. my family knows better than those silly things!! ^^ ))#jfc i sure did rant. uh. yeah. things. are really weird and uncomfy and i feel thankful that i finally can have my own things on display#outside of closets and bins again after a decade?? but i'm also waiting for the other shoe to drop / them to tell me i owe them in#some way??? bc that's how it works. 'i'm doing a nice thing you didn't even ask me for so now you have to do whatever i tell you to.'#meanwhile i can't even maladaptive daydream my way through it bc my brain is soup right now. can't remember basic things abt#my interests bc i've been on negative battery / spoons for a couple of months straight and it's only getting worse.#OKAY TLDR i'm not in a state to do anything until everything irl gets settled. and i'm trying So Hard to get it all over with but there's#only so much i can do in a day before i completely shut down. i didn't even get into the insurance stuff i've been fighting too ughhhh.#so if i show up on here in short spurts -- hi! bye! hi!! i wuv and care u!!! hope youre well mwah mwah!!!!!!! i'll post what i can and then#disappear when i need to recharge. it is what it is. i need to try to sleep now... uh if this post disappears when i wake up.... yeah......#📌 [ my posts. ]#💭 [ my thoughts. ]#vent -
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Every time I go to a party I'm reminded that it's not that I can't interact with people, it's just not a desire I have :(
#i always feel so guilty when ppl i just met are like wow u seem so cool! because im really not!#im good at masking and making people feel comfortable! its got nothing to do with my personality unfortunately#no version of me is as true as who i am by myself and idk i feel like a fraud for being nice?#ive had many people be disappointed when i just. dont want to hang out#im not a 1 on 1 person i hate being alone with someone#even with people i dearly cherish i just cant find myself comfortable when others are around#and its not about them either i think im just not compatible with social interactions#im not really looking for advice btw like this is just something im coming to terms with#i love people i truly do i just cannot exist properly around them#anyways fat bear supper was really nice :')#the mashed potatoes??? they were so fuckjng good like bro you dont understand#and shoutout to the ppl who made a salmon lasagna that was so good as well#friends played a beautiful beautiful song they made (if they end up putting it on spotify ill share it here its about a cow named Margot)#anyways i guess soft reminder you never know what people are struggling with regardless of how functioning they appear#(mashed potatoes recipe is as follow: unpeeled potatoes#+whole milk+butter+rosemary+thyme thats it thank u)
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ALSO
whats the context for the burning picture? its not their nest that burned down that was sad? is that while theyre still in the permadeath world? i assume so since it mentions retribution? is this something to do with the vex arc we havent seen but obviously made things worse in new and different ways? can we appreciate how cool that art is and how impactful that scene feels even though i don't know whats going on entirely?
the burning drawing isn't one of their nest! the nest they will have at some point is built in a meadow, and it's high off the ground, built up, to cater to grian's instincts that he kept stifling for so long. (remember, he can't fly. he yearns to be high up, but can't.)
the burny burny from the art does happen while they're still in the permadeath server. it's a deliberate decision grian and scar make. they're not burning anything that belongs to them.
i will be writing a ramble about it at some point, so look out for that! :3 (if you look at the hhau masterpost, you might even spot a placeholder for it ready in the outline—)
i will say, it does happen during the vex arc. but it's not actually important, as no vexes get mentioned. it's an event solely between scar and grian, and i'm excited to tell you guys about it, but i need some time <3
aND. WAH. OKAY. i did not expect the art appreciation after all the questions 🥺🥺🥺🥺 thank youuu!! i wasn't sure how well i'd be able to draw the scene but i'm pretty happy with the results, so hearing you affirm that really helps me feel good about it <333
#ange answers#hhau#the burny burny incident has so many emotional swings#i'm looking forward to telling u about it!!#i also should really move on with the mimic arc because currently it just keeps me and link unable to talk about [redacted]#and it's driving me mildly crazy lol#the vex arc is also fun!!#you're right in that it ends up making some things worse in new ways :3#link might be the one to do main vex arc rambles at some point!!#so excited for them <333#AND AGAIN THANK YOU SO MUCH#FOR THE NICE WORDS#FOR BEING INTERESTED IN THE AU#AND FOR THE ART APPRECIATION#🥺❤️❤️#burny anon
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