#but she's my absolute disaster child and i would do anything for her

[mcrcki]

Was that [PENELOPE MITCHELL]? Oh no no, that was just [MARLENE MCKINNON], a [CANON CHARACTER] from [HARRY POTTER]. They are [TWENTY ONE] years old, use [SHE/HER], and [ARE] aware that they are not actually from Washington DC. Too bad they can’t stray from this city for long.

how long has your character been here -

marlene’s been in dc for almost five years now. so while her information says twenty one for plotting purposes, she’s actually closer to twenty six now.

what is your character’s job -

she currently owns a bar with her father, ewan mckinnon! she does enjoy her job but she also feels like she could be doing more with her life. like there is more to her life than just pour drinks all day. i think keep debating the secret service, but everything say “no gun marlene” so. lame. she might end up becoming some kind of teacher too, i think she’d be great at that, but we’ll see.

where has your character been pulled from in their fandom -

marlene is pulled right after she’s died, so late july 1981. her last memory is travers’ killing curse flying at her.

has any magic affected your character -

she’s been brought back from the dead a couple times now, both from england and then after an event. she died in james’ arms during the island event and both of them still refuse to talk about it. trauma just goes away if you bury it , right??? but for now, she’s got her memories and everything is totally cool!

extra information -

alright here’s where i’m going to get wordy and ramble !!! bear with me while i gush about my disaster daughter.

background :

sixth child to maddie and ewan mckinnon, the youngest daughter of the mckinnon children. has a younger brother oliver (we’ll get into that dw), and five older sisters ; marina, abi, esther, cleo, and felicity. marlene is also very much the kind of person to consider her friends her family, so you won’t be able to miss hearing her calling lily, dorcas and mary her sisters.

fully pureblood family, but they are not in the pureblood society. marlene hasn’t asked questions about it. she’s perfectly happy being a blood traitor and wears it with pride.

the family is pretty evenly spilt with houses, considering marlene, ewan and fliss are gryffindor, oliver and esther being hufflepuffs, abi, maddie, marina being slytherin and then cleo being the odd one out in ravenclaw. 

she has an absolute insane phobia of flying and will do everything in her power to never get on a broom. shout out to dad for dropping her off of one at four !

is so fiercely loyal to her family, or at least the ones that she can be loyal to anymore. they’re always her first thought and even though she has her secrets, she thinks that she’s protecting them by keeping them all at arms length.

gryffindor through and through. the absolute epitome of blind bravery and loyalty.

honestly if you had to assign deadly sins to her, she’d be pride without any shadow of a doubt.

will die for her friends. has died for her friends. would do it all over again without a second though.

would be the friend you call to bail you out of jail, but unfortunately she’s probably in jail with you, or is calling you first.

got into way too many fights in school, mcgonagall probably had letters written mad libs style for the mckinnon household in her office with the amount of time she spent in detention.

was the girl to throw the parties in the common room, even if she hated playing quidditch, she loved celebrating a gryffindor win.

had decided very early on into hogwarts that she would be joining the order. she was probably only 13 or 14 when her mind was fully made up. it made it harder for her to focus on school at that point, having done rather poorly on her o.w.l.s outside of dada and charms. she was also mostly focused on dueling club for the majority of school. anything she could do to prepare her for joining she was going to do. why did she need to worry about a job after, there was a war to win.

went into the order the moment she was off the train after hogwarts. she mentored under alastor moody during her time there, having absorbed all she could from him, a second father figure when she started to distance from her own for their safety.

she moved out of the mckinnon manner right as things started to heat up, living fully at headquarters by the start of 1981. it felt safer that way.

she also didn’t want her parents worrying if she didn’t make it home at night, if she was sometimes away for days on end. or showing up battered and bruised after a mission. marlene has always been one to run head first into danger and think about the action later, consequences didn’t have much immediate damage so she never thought to worry about them. it’s unfortunately something she’s still got now even years later. will always act first and think later.

i won’t hurt yall with talking about the mckinnon death again, feel free to read the death para if you’re interested in what went down that night in july. i do have to update it a little with new names and all that jazz but the gist is there lmao

life in dc :

like i said she’s been here for almost five years so she’s gone through a lot.

currently living in a flat on her own, which she doesn’t mind really, but she really misses the comfort of living with so many people. she’s not used to solitude, considering how big her family is, and then living in dormitories, then the order house-- she misses having people around and absolutely crashes at her friends’ homes more than she should so she isn’t alone.

she will say, she’s got some not so great secrets, but she’s trying her best to be more forthcoming with her family and friends. about almost everything.

she has made sure that everyone knows about her brother oliver. the issues marlene is personally dealing with, nothing to worry about. focus on the traitor boy.

oliver, the youngest of the mckinnons, was secretly aligned with the death eaters (for his own reasons that marlene actively ignores because the second she hears death eater her vision goes red). oliver is the reason the death eaters knew marlene would be home that fateful night, and had unknowingly brought down the entire mckinnon line with one comment.

marlene will not forgive this. she can’t. she doesn’t know how. she’s spent the better part of five years blaming herself for everything, for allowing her family to ever be hurt and now knowing that she was not the one to shoulder all of the guilt, she doesn’t know how to really process that.

she couldn’t sleep for weeks at a time, had started to develop a drinking problem, was constantly being eaten away at by her guilt. it’s hard to just switch that off but if she can put that blame somewhere else, she will.

might be why she’s acting out.. see below for that ::

if you have seen anything with marlene you know she’s an absolute queen of getting into situations she should never be in, and putting her foot in her mouth the second she does.

she used to hook up with rita skeeter, she’s fought with rabastan, squared up to bellatrix without a wand, is currently trying to keep travers’ attention on her so he stays focused on her and not her family, and most of those fights were done without a wand in her hand.

she got her ass kicked by bellatrix, who then went and snapped her wand post fight. so. she’s doing great. promise.

she’s gotten it back so it’s FINE but man she really doesn’t want to talk about it. it’s probably the most embarrassing thing that’s happened to her here in the city. 

honestly, marlene has spent most of the time just bottling all of this stuff up, because she refuses to let anyone worry about her and is going to figure out how to fix this without adding any stress to the rest of the marauders. they all have enough to deal with instead of cleaning up after marlene’s dumbassery.

the mckinnon messes are ones she will deal with on her own. even if she doesn’t really know how yet, she’s going to fix it all, or go absolutely insane trying!!!! at least she’s got a good concealer to cover up those dark circles from not sleeping.

right now, she’s just a mess. idk what to tell you. can’t handle herself, will keep getting into fights, because if she shies away from them? they’ll catch on for something being off.

anyways that’s my idiot child im so sorry

connections 

✩ co workers / employees

marlene is the co-owner of a bar downtown with her father, ewan mckinnon, so if you’re looking for a job, feel free to come hit her up with your resume. girl will hire anyone atm, just so she can get a day off

✩ regulars

again, she spends a lot of the time at her job, so she definitely would know people who also are there a ton.

or even someone who just stopped in once or twice and they hit it off

✩ friends !!

friends from when she was unaware, friends from work, from other odd jobs she’s had, people she’s met while out

honestly she’s a huge advocate for friendship and having a lot of them and all that jazz and she is a ton of fun to be around. she absolutely is the kind of person to just adopt friends immediately and bring you into the fold so if you need a friend she’s your gal

✩ any former roommate or a current roommate

marlene has been in the city for nearly four years, and she has moved around the city a few times so she definitely could have had a few roommates.

would love a current one as well!!

would absolutely be down to have had a former roommate and run with that idea. maybe they still live there, maybe they didn’t get along and there’s tension, what have you !!

✩ any marauders era / order characters

listen girl still longs for the vibes of home, has debated restarting the order on her own here, so if you have a character that might be interested please, come hit her up.

she also has big aunt vibes and would 100% be down to take any of the younger gen under her wing. is she chaotic? yes. should she have any kids she mentors? absolutely not. will she do it anyways? you bet your ass.

✩ exes / ex hook ups / flings

marlene has been in the city for over four years now, she is no homebody saint so she absolutely would have been on some casual dates, like friends with benefits kind vibe. open to anyone ( marlene is pan )

[sunshine-jesse]

Ashley Graves Did Something Wrong

TCOAL plays a lot of fun games with the ways it makes you perceive events. From the title screen itself, to various pieces of official art, it primes you to accept certain narratives surrounding the game. Namely, the one that Ashley is very not good. She is, in fact, very bad! And it's pretty easy to see why- many of her actions fit neatly into the mold of an abuser. She's controlling, she tries to deflect blame, gaslights Andrew into making him take the blame for things she pushed him to do to begin with, and harasses other women to ruin his relationships with them.

It's all so easy, and makes so much sense. Case closed.

Right? Well, no. But actually yes! But actually, it's not that simple.

Y'see, as I said, the game establishes this framing from the get-go. It introduces us to our, uh, heroes and tells us in no uncertain terms that Ashley is bad and Andrew is a non-entity. It sets this framing intentionally so that many players will engage in a little quirk of human psychology called…

Confirmation bias!

I'm sure we all know what that is, right? Well, for those who don't, it's when we start with a bias towards something- or an idea of how things SHOULD be- and view every piece of evidence as confirmation that said bias is correct. The game, very blatantly, does this with Ashley's actions by priming us to see them as part of an abuse dynamic, with her as the primary abuser. And, indeed, it's not too hard to dig into Andrew's behavior and figure out that he, too, is fucked up and awful and come to the conclusion that their relationship was mutually fucked up and abusive. I did that in my last two essays, so I won't cover that ground again here. With this, it's easy to think that they bring out the worst in each other and that any relationship they have would be toxic, fucked up, dark, and every other word or phrase that describes the same idea, whether it makes them happy or not.

… But what if I told you that this, too, was an intentional misdirection?

So. Let us, for a moment, completely remove the framing that their relationship is toxic. Let us remove the framing that their relationship is abnormal or aberrant. Let's even remove the framing that either one of them is responsible for the harm of the other. I'm not arguing that any of this is not the case. Please, for the love of god, do not think that I am, if only so you can take the rest of what I have to say seriously. What I'm doing is trying to examine the two of them free of as many preconceptions as I can, using nothing but textual evidence and inference to figure out why Andrew and Ashley treat each other the way they do.

I will later examine why they MIStreat each other too, but first comes the reasons they treat each other well.

I'm going to start with Andrew, because, despite being the more complex of the two, it's actually pretty easy to figure out why he treats Ashley the way he does based on what he says. Let's go all the way back to the earliest known incident between the two in the story, where the two of them were at their most, uh, "pure," for lack of a better word: The cupcake scene.

Leyley was supposedly a problem child. She was neglected by her parents, disliked by her friends, and had nobody else but Andrew to rely on. She got nothing- absolutely nothing- from anyone else. And so, Andrew decided to celebrate her birthday, by buying her the cupcakes she wanted, by giving her what she lacked from others. By providing for her, and taking care of her. All he wanted was to make her happy, more than anything else. And, as Nina learned the hard way, at the expense of everyone else.

He doesn't lack empathy, per se. Andy just loves Leyley more than he loves anyone else by such a wide margin that his desire to provide for her overrides his fear of consequences… until those consequences threaten to separate the two of them.

That is a very Gender Roles thing to do. More on that later.

So. Ashley. Everyone's favorite disaster. Why does she treat Andrew the way she does? What does she provide for him? Well, isn't it obvious? She, too, wants to provide for him. Remember, she wanted the lemon cupcake because she thought it's what HE wanted. She also does most of the chores around the house. She prepares food, cleans the house, and does their laundry. She also provides for his non-sexual physical needs by offering him comfort whenever he needs it. It makes her feel useful. Wanted. Needed.

Ah, another very Gender Roles thing to do. See where I'm going with this?

The two neatly fit into a standard husband/wife relationship in a lot of ways. It's THE platonic ideal of such a relationship, actually! They make each other happy and provide WHAT THEY THINK the other really wants. It's really cute and perfect! As long as you ignore all the bad.

ignore all the bad …ignore all the bad… But we obviously shouldn't ignore all the bad. That would be ridiculous.

What I want to do is, instead, examine where the bad comes from, and why it's there. With the abuser/abused dynamic in mind, it's pretty easy to come to the conclusion that a mutual desire for control and power over the other is the sole determining factor. It's arguably the Central Theme of the game, and maybe a big part of what Nemlei is trying to convey. But, like, why should it end there? Why should that be where the analysis ends? There's a reason for everything.

They don't want to control each other for its own sake. They don't want to control each other solely to cover their own insecurities.

So why?

Ashley, first. She's obviously an insecure little monster, having never received the validation that she needs to really come into her own as a person. She keeps seeking it. Keeps trying to provide for Andrew. Keeps trying to make herself useful. Now, let's look at her calls towards Julia:

"DO YOU THINK YOU'RE BETTER THAN ME!? Just because you can fuck him and I can't?"

Ah, wait, hold on a minute.

"You think that's love?! Are you fucking delusional?? Cumdumpsters like you are just that."

Where does that wording come from?

"He will never love you. Not like he loves me. I am the only one. I am everything."

She doesn't need validation just for the sake of her insecurities. She needs it because she needs Andrew to be happy, and in her mind, she's the only one who can provide it. She knows him better than anyone else. She can see how happy she seems to make him, and that nobody else can do what she does. She knows, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that she makes Andrew more comfortable than anyone. She knows how important physical affection is to him. She can feel it. She doesn't lack empathy towards his plight or feelings; she has more of it than anyone, actually!

But Andrew, crucially, never seems to provide her any validation for this, even though she knows better. That's why she's so insecure.

"But wait," you might say, "didn't he, literally, fucking kill for her?"

Yes. But he always tries to place the blame on Ashley or use her as a scapegoat, when he was the one who pulled the trigger. He never accepts even the smallest amount of responsibility. And if a man can't even take responsibility for the violence he inflicts on others, what does that say about him? What does it say about how much he actually cares? oh. more gender roles. huh.

In Ashley's mind, that validation isn't validation because he didn't do it to prove he cared about her. He did it to shut her up. And… he never says anything to the contrary. He refuses to. All his validation is depressingly, overbearingly conditional.

His words always come with a caveat. They're always said in spite of something. They lack warmth. They lack kindness. They lack affection. She is never, ever given a key to lock the door to her insecurities…

…even though Andrew obviously has that key. He just refuses to give it to her.

But why?

Society! :D

There is something so fundamentally, obviously wrong with the way Andrew feels towards Ashley. She is a tar soul. A pariah. So horrid that her parents don't want her, so obviously bad that even demons don't want her. And yet Andrew, in spite of everything, still wants her. He wants to take care of her, when society tells him not to bother. He wants to protect her from other men, and even from herself. It manifests as jealousy because…

He, too, thinks the only one qualified to provide for Ashley is himself, because he was the only one who ever had. Violence comes so naturally to him that he takes it for granted. He kills for her, threatens to physically assault her when he thinks she's putting herself in danger.

It's so second nature to him that he thinks it should obviously be enough. But it isn't. His violence is so second nature as to be passive. It's non-committal. And what Ashley wants is committment.

But because of how society views Ashley, and how the world would view a romantic relationship between them, he can't truly commit to her. He can't give her the validation she really needs, because everything and everyone has told him that it's wrong. That she's wrong. And all his parents ever taught him is to be afraid of how others will react to that wrongness.

hey look, a man fearing the commitment a woman wants from him! more gender stereotypes!! I wonder what this game is trying to say!!!

Maybe I'm crazy or something. Maybe I'm just looking into it too deep. But I don't really care. I don't care if this is the intended reading, and neither should you. The fact of the matter is that most of the things that define them as toxic are not their fault. Most of the reasons they mistreat each other come from without, rather than within. The only reason they can't love each other is because the world tells them not to. Because it expects them to fill certain roles, to be certain people.

But Ashley can only ever be herself.

Maybe someone who's an actual expert on this subject matter could weigh in and give a true feminist reading. But me? I'm just here to point out patterns. I'm just here to point out facts. And one of those facts is that, to the world around her, Ashley did something wrong: She was born.

The Steam reviews of this game are fucking funny, but a lot of them say one thing that couldn't be further from the truth:

"I can fix her!"

No, you can't. She's only 'broken' in the context of her environment.

But in the words of another analyst:

It's madness to expect tar to behave like water.

So cut them some slack! They might finally succeed in a world that wanted nothing more than for them to fail. It's not our right to take that away from them.

[checkoutmybookshelf]

From Criminial Mastermind to Fairy Tale Hero: The End of Artemis Fowl

Here we are, everyone: The final Artemis Fowl book. It has been a journey revisiting the first series I was old enough to follow and fandom, and it's wild to me that we're finally at the end. Especially since I picked up the first Artemis Fowl book in late elementary school (I'm genuinely not sure when though, because the first book came out in April of 2001, when I was in fifth grade and it's very possible I didn't pick the book up until sixth grade, which would have put me at 11, same age as Artemis in that first book) and the final book came out in 2012, when I was in my junior year of undergrad. So at that point, Artemis, Holly, and Butler had been part of my life for a long time. And now here we are, to say goodbye to them again after this leisurely re-listen/read. Let's talk Artemis Fowl: The Last Guardian.

Artemis grew and changed so much across eight books, which makes sense because holy cow do kids change a LOT between 11 and 15. We get so busy living life in those years that we don't really think about how much we truly learn and grown between prepubescence and full-on teenagerhood, but that is a time of massive change, and I think that more than anything else really justifies how Artemis goes from a chillingly vampiric child to a teenager with enough compassion and empathy to understand that sometimes the right choice is a heroic self-sacrifice for the people that your people (both humans and the people, in this case) love. Artemis also did a really interesting version of that thing so many teenagers do where they hit a point where they can't just phone in their abilities anymore and have to actually put effort in, but for Artemis it was emotional rather than intelligence. And yet even when making said heroic sacrifice, we have the absolutely beautiful callback to the end of book one, where Artemis drugs his mother, Butler, and Juliet to keep them from being harmed by the bio-bomb. To stop Holly from preventing him from stopping Opal, Artemis sedates her. The more things change, the more they stay the same...

Except where best villain ever Opal Koboi is concerned. By this book, Opal is so disconnected from reality that she is willing to risk literally going nuclear to escape captivity, and then just...casually sparks off the apocalypse because if there is one thing our girl wants, it's to be Empress of the World, and if that means using spirit zombies and an ancient fairy doomsday device, then I guess it's a good thing she's already versed in black magic. Or something. Opal is fully and completely off the rails at this point, and if you catch yourself referring to yourself as "Mommy" in reference to the spirits of several scores of ancient elven berserkers who would--barring a geas--murder you for it, you might want to stop and take a long, hard look at your life choices. And maybe don't forget that you've cloned yourself, because that's the kind of little detail that can completely ruin your chances of being Empress of the World.

Holly quite possibly deserves every medal that exists for managing to drag Artemis's extremely out-of-shape butt through increasingly dangerous and high-stakes missions while navigating fairy politics and *checks notes* breaking up with her commanding officer after a disastrous date where they both got kicked out of a crunchball match. (And once again...HOW DARE Colfer leave this in exposition and not show us this amazing disaster of a date!?!?) Holly has also just been through the emotional wringer with Artemis and every time he decided to double-cross or lie by omission to bring off a plan and every time he does something infuriatingly human that drives up her blood pressure and yet makes the mission succeed. And then she has to sit there and watch him die to save humans and fairies. Seriously, the fact that Holly Short is a functional being rather than a hot mess is nothing short of a miracle.

And then we come to Butler. Long-suffering, super fucking over it, broken-hearted Domovoi Butler. Artemis got DAMN lucky that the whole "put my spirit in a clone of me" plan panned out, because if it hadn't, Holly was entirely correct: Butler would never have recovered. Butler and Opal might be my two favorite characters in the entire series at this point. That's not where I started--for a very long time, Holly was my favorite character, and Commander Root still gets an honorable mention--but as a grown-ass adult (I'm not doing that math for you, if you want to know that I'm old, you do the math), I cannot escape how dedicated, competent, kind, and just AWESOME Butler is. I feel like the vibe here is very similar to the thing that happens when you watch Sound of Music as a kid and either Maria or one of the kids is your favorite character, but when you come back to it as an adult, Captain Von Trapp is EVERYTHING (RIP Christopher Plummer, we loved you). Butler has a similar vibe but in a different genre.

So, I was an adult and had enough experience of watching fandoms to see the mixed reactions to this book being released. People were sad the series was ending, people were disappointed because the series had seemingly drifted, and people loved it. My reaction was pretty mixed, because I had a lot going on, I knew there were good things here but I was also kind of missing the heisty, criminal mastermind vibes, but also OPAL KOBOI. So I was pretty unsure how to feel about this book when it came out, and then I didn't reread it for literal years because I went to grad school.

Returning to this book now, I have suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuch respect for how Colfer tied up the series and how he pulled off a new Irish mythological cycle, but updated for the twenty-first century. I have enough life on me to appreciate the changes Artemis goes through, and enough literature degrees to have a new and deeply fulfilling perspective on the series structure. Last Guardian is not my favorite book of the series--it's not even in the top three--but I think that what it does is genuinely impressive and I love how you can finish this book and go instantly back into the OG Artemis Fowl. The story does not, strictly speaking, have to end. And that is a vibe I can 100% get behind.

I deeply love the Artemis Fowl books, and I cannot recommend the series enough. They have so many strengths, are incredibly well-written, and they live rent-free in my head even now as an adult.

[nono-uwu]

First oc post i am shaking crying throwing up for multiple reasons and also anxious as hell- anyways, meet the man, the failure disaster gay, the forever doomed ginger(derogatory/lh)

I forgot to add his birthday omg, it's march 13th

Lore utc (i wrote a lot lmao), the uh post ch 134 stuff will be elaborated on later (or if asked. Actually, ask me anything about him. And my other oc's once they're posted. Please. I will answer in great detail. I also need a distraction. Pls.)

So basically, among the first few vampires (a 4th progenitor to be percise) turned by Shikama was a woman who showed great potential for spells and magic. She had a loving husband and child which she tragically lost in an accident. Upon turning into a vampire, her family was still the only thing on her mind. She accepted to help Shikama in his endeavors to revive Mikaela since she hoped she could revive her own family in the proccess. Unfortunately it didn't work. Disillusioned, she abandoned vampire kind and started searching for the possible reincarnation of her beloved husband, whom she may be able to have a child with and have family again.

Fast forward a a lot, and I mean a lot, of years and she arrived in 60s japan. None of the people she had hope for turned out to be the reincarnation of her late husband until that fateful day. She encountered a (rather pathetic may I add) man in his late 20s and it was like a miracle. The woman cornered the man in disbelief and from this awkward first meeting blossomed true love. Then everything went to shit lmaooo

The first problem was that the mans family didn't approve of the woman. Tough this didn't stop their love. Next was the issue of bearing a child, something that a vampire simply can't do. Well, an ordinary one but this woman was anything but ordinary. By some impossible miracle she bore a child. A biological child. (GIRL HOW?? We will never know and frankly, i don't want to think about it💀)

The child was, as expected tbh, kind of a disaster. Already born with pointy ears and sharp fangs. The child needed both human food and blood to properly sustain themselves. Drinking blood outside of their family would permanently stop their aging. Despite this, the couple was overjoyed. (And then named their child "mistake" bc that would help /s.) They named him "Machigai". Why tho?? I dunno man something along the lines of "a mistake but the best mistake of their life" bruh

So after Machigai was old enough to walk, but not old enough to remember, the mother diappeared, leaving father and child behind. The father did his best to raise such an... extraordinary child but it was understandably kind of impossible. Machigai grew up alone and isolated from his peers. He was always wearing a hood of some kind and rarley opened his mouth to talk. In high school, he met a girl who he became good friends with but she is another oc I'll post about sometime adlf,wpl.

Anyways! Come Machigai's high school graduation and 18th birthday, his father... disappeared. All he left was a note saying, that Machigai now owned the apartment and that there is enough blood in the fridge to sustain Machigai's thrist while he could grow and mature. To an already depressed and disillusioned Machigai this obviously didn't help. Throughout the next years he became a shut in, who only left the house if absolutely necessary. All he did all day was play video games, watch tv and later be on the internet. Once he ran out of his fathers blood was when things changed. He had to go out and actually find a new source of blood. Welp, sorry to unlucky bastards who went into dark alleyways at night bc these types of people became Machigai's source of blood. (That's when he stopped aging)

On one of these nightly escapades, Machigai was greeted by a large man in a neat black suit who called himself "Saito". Saito claimed to have known Machigai's mother and offered a deal: Machigai would offer up his unique constitution to the Hyakuya sect's research and in turn get a well paying job and a guaranteed source of blood. He agreed. "Welcome to the Hyakuya sect. I look forward to your performance"

Machigai was practically a lab rat for the development of cursed gear. Thanks to his half-n-half physiology he could tank wounds from cursed gear/magic n shit while still providing useful data to how effective it is. During this time Machigai aquired knowledge of vampire culture(?), became familiar with magic and it's quirks and learned how to perform simple spells and whatnot.

Around 2011, when the internet was already fairly well used, Machigai came across a forum dedicated to paranormal sightings. Various users claimed that a secluded spot in Kyoto was home to vampires. (Ferid was the one spreading these rumors btw) Most would have dissmissed this as someone wanting attention, yet Machigai was intrigued. He was well aware that vampires existed across the world but he mever knew how to actually contact them. Perhaps out of morbid curiosity, perhaps out of a genuine want for connection with people like him, he went to check out the spot. There, he met none other than the eccentric Ferid Bathory who specifically manufactured the rumor to meet Machigai (extra much?). He was well aware of Machigai's work for Rígr "Saito" Stafford and was trying to one up his father by stealing his most prized lab-rat. Machigai declined, not trusting a single thing out of that vampires mouth. Ferid left, already proclaiming that one day Machigai would be working for him.

Machigai stuck around that area as it was already well into the night and public transport wouldn't start up until the early morning. There he met another vampire: Crowley Eusford. Their meeting wasn't planned or meticulously calculated, it was actually rather awkward. Their chat was meaningless and short but in the end leagues above whatever Ferid likes to plan. Crolwey has already unwillingly heard about this curious being from Ferid and seeing Machigai himself left him wanting to learn more about him. Machigai was left a little hopeful, that perhaps it's not too late for him to look for connections.

So the apocalypse rolls around-

Machigai makes a deal with Saito that in exchange for his freedom (*eagle screech*) he would keep his mouth shut about anything the Hyakuya sect discovered while Machigai was there.

Machigai seeks out the Demon Army where he successfully keeps his half vampire identity a secert until someone on his squad gets blackmailed into revealing it. Before that, he gets a cursed weapon, a pair of daggers. And lo and behold, the demon possessing the daggers is his own mother. Unfortunately since the now demonic mother didn't witness Machigai growing up, she falsey believes to be able to still shape Machiagi to her will. After getting locked up by the army, Machigai completley gives up, only wishing for his miserable existence to end (spoiler: It won't! Ever. :) ). He ultimately loses any and all trust he has in humanity or just anything in general.

After about half a year of grueling torture and some experimentation, Machigai gets freed (kidnapped) by Ferid and promptly brought to Kyoto Sangiuem. Krul Tepes, finding Machigai to be useful in her fake-ish war against humanity and whatever she's planning with Yuu and Mika, lets him be part of the japanese vampires under Ferids faction. Ferid found himself unwilling to deal with the often uncooperative and irritated new "recruit" so he did what he does best and made it Crowley's problem.

After a rather agressive and disrespectful first impression, Machigai was officially a... coworker? of Crowley and thus also Chess and Horn in Nagoya. The three got the additional task by Ferid to somehow domesticate this feral and angry stray animal and get him to open up. At least that's how Ferids orders were phrased. Shenanigans, Drama and FeelingsTM ensue.

(How did I write so much??)

[mister-e-muss]

Parenting: A TiPo microfic

(No I have not seen Kung Fu Panda 4 yet)

You know, looking back on it, maybe letting Lei Lei invite friends over to the Jade Palace was a mistake. Not that Po would ever say so out loud, mind you. But a veritable litter of kids rallying around one very capable, very mischievous leader was always a recipe for disaster.

The birthday celebration hadn’t been this out of hand at the start. There were no less than seven Kung Fu Masters just in their immediate surroundings, how hard could watching the neighborhood kids be?

As it turns out, very hard. As soon as the celebratory noodles had been eaten, they all scampered, scarpered, and scuttled away in every direction. Crane had to be dispatched to provide an aerial view, Mantis was busy checking small spaces, and Monkey was furiously taping down every breakable item the Hall of Warriors had. (The Urn of Whispering Warriors was the sole exception; it had already been broken before the party started.)

Where Tigress and Viper were, Po couldn’t say. Neither did he know where Master Shifu was, but he was sure they were doing their best.

———————————————

“Inner peace,” Shifu breathed to himself, trying desperately to ignore the sole pig child gnawing on his shoe.

———————————————

Really, Po reflected as he turned the corner, his real mistake had been teaching Lei Lei how to do Kung Fu. A smart kid was dangerous. A dangerous kid who’d been taught to be dangerous was dangerous-er. But most danger-est of all was a kid who was smart, strong, and adorable.

A fact reflected by the sight before him.

Lei Lei waved at him innocently from across the hallway. “Daddy!” She called.

Po felt a moment of relief. Whatever chaos was ensuing the rest of the Jade Palace, at least his daughter was safe. “There you are. Ah, I was starting to get worried. Didn’t hear a thing.”

Lei Lei smiled with satisfaction. Po’s heart was warmed for a moment, before he noted the shadows slowly opening the doors on the hallway.

“What’s going on?” Po asked, not very sure if he wanted to know the answer. At the very least, he knew now where the kids went.

Lei Lei still smiled, but it was the smile of victory. “Destwoy him my awmy!”

————————————————

Viper savored the smooth warm comfort of her tea. “You think it’s all right letting the guys watch the kids?”

Tigress waited to answer, finishing her own cup. “If Po is good at only three things, it’s cooking, Kung fu, and kids. I’m sure he has-“

They were cut off as a familiar cry of distress rang across the Jade Palace. Tigress heaved a deep, long suffering sigh before finishing her thought. “-. . . Absolutely nothing in hand.”

Viper have a sympathetic smile. “Want me to check on them?”

Tigress stood. “It’s fine. I’ll save him.”

————————————————

A few minutes later, Tigress found Po. Or more accurately, she found the mass of hyperactive children currently smothering him.

“Am I interrupting anything?” She asked rhetorically.

“Tigrehf?” A muffled voice called from beneath the squirming playful mass. “I don’f mean to scare you, but I fhink our daufter is drying to take ofer the world. And I don’f know if I can ftop her.”

Tigress smirked. “I guess then I’ll just have to catch her!” Her announcement came with exaggerated menace and showy growls near the end. The mass of fur and feathers fled in delighted terror.

Tigress spared a moment to look at the Dragon Warrior in all his overwhelmed, completely unprepared glory. “Want to tag out for a bit?”

Po waved away the suggestion, still panting for breath. “Nah, nah, it’s fine. I’ll be chasing them in a second.”

Tigress huffed in amusement. “I’ll be herding them for a bit. You join me when you’ve caught your breath.”

Po’s head collapsed “I love you so much.”

Tigress smirked as she squatted down to look Po in the eye. “Oh don’t say that just yet. You’ll be making it up to me later. After she’s gone to bed.”

“Eh,” Po said in lieu of a question.

“I’ve been thinking,” Tigress continued. “It could be nice to give Lei Lei a little sister. Don’t you think?”

Po’s face turned red. “Eh-Heh. Like we don’t have enough to do, right?”

Tigress theatrically pulled herself up to full height. “Of course, if you don’t feel like you can handle another. . .” She started to walk after Lei Lei and company.

Po pulled himself to his elbow’s “No no, I can totally handle it. It’ll be fun!”

Tigress smiled as she started to run. “Then come on; we can’t let our daughter take over the world just yet!”

Po was laughing in full as he sprinted after her.

[aurorawest]

2023 Reading Wrap-Up

Is it February of 2024? Yes! Am I still going to post my favorite books that I read in 2023? Also yes!

Ginn Hale's Cadeleonian Series, the second half of which I read in 2023: Champion of the Scarlet Wolf, Book Two; Master of Restless Shadows, Book One; and Master of Restless Shadows, Book Two

This series begins with Lord of the White Hell and continues with Champion of the Scarlet Wolf, then concludes with Master of Restless Shadows. Each duology follows a different set of characters, but it's a true series so you need to read them in order. It's a toss-up for me whether I preferred Champion of the Scarlet Wolf or Master of Restless Shadows. Both are fantastic duologies. I particularly loved getting Atreau's story in Master because he's sort of an unlikable playboy-esque character in the preceding books...but wait! Turns out there's more to him after all.

After Francesco by Brian Malloy

Who would think a book about living through the AIDS epidemic in NYC in the 80s would be as funny as this book is? It will also tear your heart out and stomp on it. Also takes place partly in Minneapolis (and is by a Minnesotan author).

Silver in the Wood by Emily Tesh

Folklorist meets the Green Man and they fall in love. This is the first half of a duology, the second being Drowned Country, which I just finished today so can't included it on my 2023 wrap-up. All the dark and violent whimsy of the mythic past and the most brutal versions of fairy tales, plus a lovely romance.

Some Desperate Glory by Emily Tesh

Imagine the love child of Lost, Person of Interest, and Battlestar Galactica, but queer and with multiverse shenanigans thrown in (the author has cited Ender's Game as a huge influence). I don't want to say anything more than that, because I feel strongly that you need to go into this book knowing nothing. The twists and turns are so good, the main trio are wonderful, complicated characters, and the world is super cool.

The Bedlam Stacks by Natasha Pulley

In some ways the most heartbreaking of Pulley's novels. Also probably her most dreamy and magical. It's my least favorite of her books, but my least favorite Natasha Pulley book still ended up on my best of 2023 reading list.

The Half Life of Valery K by Natasha Pulley

This book awakened in me a latent love of Soviet queers. You'll see this book filed under sci-fi by booksellers, but it isn't really—it's historical fiction about a very real nuclear disaster in the USSR that was covered up for decades. Like all of Pulley's books, the characters are deeply complicated and flawed. The pleasure is really in reading the way she tells a story and her beautiful use of language, so even if you're not interested in Soviet nuclear disasters, I absolutely recommend you read this. Also, you'll probably be interested in Soviet nuclear disasters when you're done.

The Lost Future of Pepperharrow by Natasha Pulley

Haha, you thought The Watchmaker of Filigree Street punched you in the chest with feels? Get ready for the sequel, which will have you Curled Into A Sobbing Ball On The Floor™. Join Thaniel Steepleton, Keita Mori, and their adopted Waifish Victorian Orphan, Six, as they go to Japan, where things are weird, there are ghosts, and Thaniel and Mori still somehow don't understand what they mean to each other.

The Kingdoms by Natasha Pulley

"What if France won the Napoleonic Wars because of time travelers" shouldn't have shattered me the way this book did, but of course it's a Natasha Pulley novel so it absolutely did. Missouri Kite is the most Gay Little Man™. And Joe, poor Joe. The PINING. The YEARNING. When the reveal happens, I had to go back and read prior sections of the book and good god do they hit different. Different and SADDER. This book is my favorite of Natasha Pulley's novels.

Tommy Cabot Was Here and Peter Cabot Gets Lost by Cat Sebastian

The first two books in Cat Sebastian's The Cabots series. The books are historical fiction that follow various queer men in the Cabot family. The Cabots are one of those old money, liberal New England families—think Kennedys. Both books are about Sad Gay Men™ finding love in soft, tiptoeing Cat Sebastian fashion. Peter Cabot is a road trip romance and a bit longer, so the characters have some time to breathe.

Something Wild & Wonderful by Anita Kelly

This was probably a Stucky fic at one point, right? I mean. No shade though, truly! This was my favorite romcom that I read in 2023. It was also a comp for Strangers to Husbands, haha. I love the setting—hiking the Pacific Crest Trail—and I love the main characters, Alexei and Ben. Alexei came out to his family recently and got rejected, while Ben is from a big, accepting Portuguese family. Funny, touching, and an excellent love story.

Cattle Stop by Kit Oliver

Looks like a romcom but will stab you in the heart repeatedly. Kit Oliver has a gorgeous way with words and captures the dynamic between two people who have no idea how to talk to each other so well. I'm also a sucker for farm settings.

The Sugared Game and Subtle Blood by KJ Charles (The Will Darling Adventures)

I've read almost all of KJ Charles's books at this point, but the Will Darling Adventures are my favorites (I read the first book in the series in 2022). I love the combination of romance and action/adventure. I've never met a m/m book set in the interwar period that I haven't loved. Will and Kim are wonderful characters, and sometimes I think about what other adventures they had after book three ended.

Honeytrap by Aster Glenn Gray

An FBI agent and a GRU agent get assigned to work a case together in 1959 and they fall in looooove. There's a road trip, a family dinner, and FEELS. I'm not sure I've ever had a time skip hit me in the gut so hard. Remember how I said I love Soviet queers? Here's another example.

Wranglestone and Timberdark by Darren Charlton

What if the real dystopia isn't the zombie apocalypse, but "normal" life? I don't know if I've ever read a YA series that sucker-punched me as hard as this one. I know I've never read a zombie book that sucker-punched me as hard as this one. I don't think these books have even been published in the US (only in the UK), but if you can get your hands on them, they're worth it. Really beautifully written in a style that evokes the emptiness of the great national parks of the American west.

Honorable mentions:

The Charioteer by Mary Renault

The Scottish Boy by Alex de Campi

A Power Unbound by Freya Marske

[oneforthemunny]

can you do headcannons for mafia!eddie when the baby is born?

sure I'll put what we have right here so enjoy :) feel free to send in anything else you think might add to the lore.

eddie's petrified at first (obv lol) but once he realizes like "oh were having a baby" he goes into planner mode. doesn't even really give himself time to celebrate or experience the pregnancy a lot bc he's on level ten with anxiety. like will wake up in the middle of the night bc he thought of something else and he has to be prepared. he has to have a plan.

you pull him away for a baby moon after he's adamant that the nursery needs to be in the closet and that he's threatened the hospital that they shut down an entire wing for you. it's just the two of you, in a really small cottage out in the middle of absolutely no where. it's not really a destination place but you just want to spend time with him where there's no one else and he can let his guard down for a while.

when baby bea is born, eddie is a fucking disaster of a human being. you go into labor and it's over for him. like he's prepared but he's still a wreck. he's so fucking awful and just anxious and it stresses you out to the point where you yell out him just to get out of your birthing suite. wayne has to pull him to the side and be like "you gotta calm down. everyone's got it covered, just go be in there with her." so he finally does calm bc they do have it covered.

fucking sobs like ugly cries when bea lets out her first cry. like he's been so stressed and anxious and he looks at this teeny tiny baby and is like overwhelmed bc it hits him for the first time that "holy shit that's a baby. I made that. that's literally my child what the fuck."

obviously he's most worried about the dogs and baby bea, but lucky for him they adore her. they sniff her once and like she comes in with you, and they're like "yes this is my baby right here" especially lucifer, he's like bonded to her. will not leave her side. the first time she cried they freaked out and started howling and barking and it was pure chaos.

eddie quickly realizes he prepared for a lot of things, but he has no fucking clue how to change a diaper. max, surprisingly, had been going to classes with you and is like "here dumbass." and shows him.

bea doesn't cry all the time, but when she does she is a wailer. like wakes eddie out of a dead sleep. he's used to not sleeping, but that newborn parent sleep is so different. he keeps trying to show up to meetings and is so tired or all over the place that rick quite literally forces him on a staycation/vacation.

he has the most fun when bea is like six months, because she's started gaining a personality and makes these cute little faces and sounds and it just makes eddie melt.

when she gets older, she goes through a phase where she really wants to be a mermaid, so for her birthday he rents out an aquarium for the day. has those mermaid performers come in, it's so goddam extra and over the top but she wanted it???? the goody bags are insane lol.

that's all I have for rn feel free to add what you would like

[eyesofshinigami]

Asking for a snippet of 'Adventures in Babysitting' for WIP Weekend, please and thank you 💖

As you wish, darling!

A huff from behind the couch, then Eddie opened his arms to let his son snuggle in. “How did you know it was me?” 

“Magic,” Eddie replied, rubbing his cheek over the top of Dustin’s head. He still smelled soft and powdery, his puppy-scene comforting to Eddie. “Guess you heard everything, huh?” 

Dustin nodded, pressing his nose into Eddie’s neck. “It’s okay. I didn’t like Annie that much. She said my books were too long and didn’t like to listen to me read.” 

Eddie sighed. Finding Dustin a babysitter that was worth a damn was proving to be an epic pain in the ass. It wasn’t Dustin’s fault, not by a long shot. Even without being his dad, Eddie would tell you what a well-behaved child he had. Dustin liked to read and liked to build things; the kid had more legos than he knew what to do with, and Eddie was constantly finding his appliances taken apart while Dustin took note of how things went together. He never talked back, never threw a fit, and was pretty easy-going, even if he could be a bit of a know-it-all sometimes. 

They just… couldn’t find a good fit, it seemed. Most of the nannies that had come through had been absolute disasters. They either wanted in Eddie’s pants, had no interest in Dustin once they found out his hobbies, or were apparently trying to sneak information about the band’s newest album. 

It was exhausting, for both of them.

“You know you didn’t do anything, right?”

“Well, yeah. All she talked about was how much she liked your music and kept asking me if I knew where you wrote your lyrics and stuff. Like I would tell her anything anyway,” Dustin replied with a snort. “I liked her less than I liked Jacob, but way more than I liked Susan.” 

Eddie sighed again. Jacob had been really good, a sweet-faced Omega who Dustin took to immediately. He thought he’d found a good one, right up until Jacob took it upon himself to crawl into Eddie’s bed like he belonged there. Eddie was no stranger to groupies (that’s how he had gotten Dustin, after all), but the very idea of the guy just inviting himself into Eddie’s space and pawing at him like that wasn’t going to work.

So, yeah. Here they are, nanny-less and with Eddie wondering what the hell he was going to do about it. 

HELP ME WRITE

[anthurak]

What a lot of Helluva Boss fans have in common with Blitzo...

Something I’ve realized recently is that there is this great, fascinating irony in this fixation that much of the Helluva Boss fandom has on the idea of some simple ‘wholesome’ family dynamic between Blitzo, Stolas, Loona and Octavia. Where Blitzo and Stolas are in some happy marriage and raising Loona and Octavia and everything is sweet and wholesome.

Because you know who ELSE is super-fixated on finding some idealized ‘wholesome family dynamic’?

Blitzo.

And after watching Seeing Stars, I think we can say pretty definitively that this very fixation is one of the biggest PROBLEMS with Blitzo and one of the main reasons his relationship with Loona is so dysfunctional.

Looking back in hindsight, it’s pretty clear that Bltizo’s decision to adopt a hellhound was driven by his desperate need for emotional connection to someone. Because that’s the crux of Blitzo’s entire character: Thanks to his metric shitton of childhood trauma and baggage, he is absolutely desperate for emotional connection and validation, while simultaneous being absolutely TERRIFIED of any kind of commitment or letting himself be vulnerable. It’s why he burned down his relationship with Verosika, it’s the source of his relationship problems with Stolas, it’s why he’s so obsessed with the M&Ms (because he’s desperate for what they have) and it’s why he’s such a dysfunctional father-figure to Loona.

Because looking at the flashback in Seeing Stars, we can easily infer that Blitzo wasn’t looking to adopt some disaffected, traumatized loner just about to age out of the adoption system like Loona, but rather an actual child. Instead, the entire reason he adopted Loona was because her situation and the words of the overseer positively smashed Blitzo’s sympathetic trauma button and caused him to adopt Loona right there and then. I mean, think of it this way: Adopting Loona was effectively an impulse buy from Blitzo.

Now, this alone isn’t necessarily a sign of bad parenting from Blitzo. The problem is that it’s pretty clear Blitzo never adjusted his expectations of what a daughter like Loona actually needs. Because he seems to have been so fixated on creating some wholesome father-daughter relationship that would solve all his perceived problems, he’s therefore fixated on treating Loona like she’s some troubled child or teenager, rather than a young woman in her early twenties, something Moxie pointed out as early as the pilot. We see this in basically all of Blitzo’s interactions with Loona, particularly in how overly protective, overly affectionate and generally ‘clingy’ Blitzo gets towards Loona.

And combined with how Blitzo’s approach towards fatherhood seems to consist entirely of ‘don’t be like MY dad’, this seeming unwillingness/inability to see Loona as an adult rather than a child looks to be one of the central reasons for Blitzo being such a disaster of a parent and his generally dysfunctional relationship with Loona. Which we in turn see play out across the show and is on full display at the beginning of Seeing Stars:

Blitzo seems to be working from the idea of ‘be everything my dad wasn’t’, so his approach to parenting seems to be little more than ‘shower Loona in praise and affection and give her anything and everything he thinks she wants’. Which happens to be just about the exact OPPOSITE parenting/help someone like Loona actually needs. Because all he’s doing is basically enabling all of Loona’s unhealthy, anti-social, hyper-defensive coping mechanisms for her own trauma.

Like I’ve seen a number of people take issue with how so-called ‘abusive’ Loona is towards Blitzo with how much she physically lashes out at him, such as when she gives him a nutshot at the end of Seeing Stars. But frankly, that behavior should NOT be surprising at all, given what we’ve seen of them: As we see with both Loona and the M&Ms, Blitzo has basically zero respect for or even concept of personal boundaries and has a tendency to get super clingy and overly-affectionate. So is it any wonder that someone like Loona who is extremely defensive both emotionally and physically, after what has clearly been a VERY traumatic childhood would almost reflexively respond the way she does?*

That’s not to say that Loona’s tendency to beat the crap out of Blitzo is a good thing, but rather it’s a symptom of both their dysfunctional relationship and how Blitzo clearly has NO IDEA how to be a functional parent. Blitzo’s overly-affectionate, protective, clingy nature keeps Loona retreating into her shell, and his unwillingness to set any kind of boundaries for her and give her anything she wants simply allows Loona to stay in her hyper-defensive comfort zone.

It’s why despite Loona being 22 years old, she generally acts not much older than Octavia, someone at least 4 years her junior. Because in many respects she’s likely still much the same as she was when Blitzo adopted her. Blitzo’s parenting has enabled all of her pre-existing issues and allowed her to simply stay as she was while growing and maturing very little.**

Which of course is not to say that Blitzo doesn’t love his daughter. Far from it, in fact. As I’ve mentioned elsewhere, the overarching narrative point of the problems both Blitzo and Stolas have with their respective daughters, and which Loona highlighted in Seeing Stars can be summed up as: It is entirely possible for one to both genuinely, unconditionally care for and love their child and want nothing but the best for them, AND be an utter DISASTER of a parent.

Which all ties back to the grand irony I opened with: How much of the fandom is fixated on Blitzo, Stolas, Loona and Octavia being some simple, wholesome, happy family while Blitzo’s obsessive fixation on having that exact sort of family dynamic with Loona is presented as one of his biggest FLAWS as a character.

Just compare Blitzo’s fixation on being a wholesome, doting father to a clearly unreceptive Loona to how much of the fandom seems to view Blitzo and Stolas as already being married and Loona and Octavia as already being sisters.

Or just as Blitzo seems unwilling/unable to view Loona as a young adult rather than a child, look at how much of the fandom seems to want to view Loona and especially Octavia as children being raised by their two dads, rather than the two young adults that the show clearly seems to be treating them as.

I’ve spoken before at length about my issues with the fandom’s fixation on Loona and Octavia having a ‘simple and wholesome family relationship’, both with each other and their fathers. And this might be the biggest reason I simply DON’T see the show going in this direction that a lot of the fandom is thinking/hoping it will.

Because it runs counter to what is looking to be a major aspect of Blitzo’s character arc as both a father and a person in general: Learning to stop chasing the nebulous, vaguely defined idealized relationships he’s been so obsessively fixated on, and realizing that he CAN have the close, happy, validating personal connections he’s so desperate for if he simply opens up emotionally to the people around him and recognize how much they DO actually care about him. Like how Moxie may not appreciate his clingy attempts at being a family, but clearly would be happy to have Blitzo as a close friend. Or how Loona isn’t and was never the young, innocent child Blitzo wanted her to be, but she still appreciates him as a father who has helped her.

As I detailed in another post; Helluva Boss seems to be a story all about showing characters in messy, dysfunctional, dare I say… problematic relationships, yet also showing those characters that do genuinely care about each other can still work through and overcome their problems to find genuine happiness and fulfillment with each other. Not in some idealized ‘perfect’ sense, but one that works nonetheless.

--

*Which becomes rather tragically ironic when we see that Loona does recognize and appreciate the fact that Blitzo cares about her. And even recognizes how dysfunctional their relationship is, given her ‘this kind of shit gets messy’ and ‘everybody’s got issues’ lines. But while Loona might recognize this, Blitzo clearly does NOT. And given how neither of the two are any good at meaningful communication, it gives the sense that Loona’s lashing out at Blitzo is in part kind of the only way she has to enforce personal boundaries around him.

**This actually makes it all the more ironic that when Loona and Octavia actually meet, Octavia’s mere presence seems to immediately encourage Loona to start acting more mature and insightful than we’ve ever seen her. Which in turn is why I think it’s pretty clear that a friendship between these two is so significant: Loona and Octavia each represent something the other desperately needs in her life, and a clear contrast from their complicated, dysfunctional relationships with their respective fathers.

[blood-orange-juice]

Hello! May I ask if you have any headcanons for Fischl, Albedo, or Kaeya? Or thoughts about them in general?

Either way it’s quite fun to read your posts on Childe’s personality✨

Hello! ^^ Thank you for the ask and for the kind words! These guys are among my favorite characters and I mostly have incoherent shouting.

*

My main Fischl headcanon is that Oz is not an electro construct but an instance of true creation magic, similar to what Gold did and Narcissenkreuz Ordo tried to replicate.

Girl just accidentaly performed a godlike feat because she was lonely and bored. She does that.

Other than that, all my previous headcanons have been covered in the last year summer event. She's talented, kind, observant, a bit too sensitive for the everyday world and brave af (not the "rush into danger" brave, the "I can look at myself closely and admit I was wrong" brave).

Lil sis is majestic. And she got all the important stuff right. If she wants to roleplay through life then I see no problem.

(it's so often shown how caring she is! during Unreconciled Stars she's one of the first to arrive in the disaster zone. and she regularly invites Mona for dinner because she knows Mona keeps spending all her earnings on books instead of food.

she just... helps others. all the time.)

Also Bennett absolutely has a crush on her.

Also sitting in a garden watching a play is THE shit (even more so in real lfe) and I loved that summer event.

*

With Albedo it's weird in the sense that there's a lot of going on with him but we either have obvious things (him being Gold's creation) or things we can't really connect with anything yet. I wonder if him being a potential danger to Monstadt will be subverted.

I also hope that him not getting a winter event this year means Hoyo are cooking something else. They usually do that when a character doesn't appear for a while.

*

For Kaeya I would need a week and multiple posts.

Do you know that his surname, Alberich, means 'king of elves' in Old High German?

(which in Old French slowly became Alberon and then Auberon. so not just a king of elves, the king of elves)

Which is incredibly bizarre because he's a descendant of the regent family, not the royal family. Why were they called Alberichs?

Also In The Song of the Nibelungs (which for me rhymes thematically with The Ballad of the Fjords spear lore) Alberich is the dwarf/dark elf (svartálfar) who guards the treasure of Nibelungs.

(actually I should write a detailed post about it. hold my beer)

A smaller thing: it also makes me sad how his EN VA makes him sound slightly sadistic while in CN he's more of the "teasing older buddy/coworker" type (and later in the story we learn he's incredibly kind). He's just so beautifully voiced in the Chinese version and none ot the translations do him justice.

[writerfae]

I heard you are interested in the disaster that is Endre's gf, Odette (19), and their relationship! Oh boy!

A little worldbuilding for context:

In the country of Galla three people rule together at once. They are called the triarhists (or that's how i decided it will be in English) and they have magic (gold wings that they can summon on their backs and grow to any size they want, gold fire and gold chains), and they pass this on to their first born. Their primary role is to protect the people of Galla if the Black swamp ever threatened them again, and in the worst case scenario lift Galla higher so they can't be reached. Triarhists are NEARLY seen as gods, but everyone knows they are just humans.

Odett and Endre are both soon to be triarhists. Endre hates it, but Odette always helps him with everything she can.

Odette loves being a triarhist. She loves her people, and wants to help them in every way she can.

She is smart, understanding and compassionate. Everyone thinks she'll be one of the best rulers in history.

The other characters love her! Adél, Ákos and Bendegúz all see her as a big sister, and she also genuinely loves them. Not to mention the true love that is between her and Endre. See, they all grew up together, so they're really close.

So, what went wrong?

When Odette was really little she had this idea. She listened to the scary legends about the swamp and had nightmares about them like every other child. She saw little Adél, bearly three years old crying at the mere mention of the place. But what if they, the triarhists could destroy the Black swamp for good?

She told this to her dad, who at the time praised her, because it was just another sign of her growing to be a caring ruler. But as time passed, and she didn't let go of this idea they argued over it alot.

Odette's dad said that she shouldn't start a war when they are safe. That her plans are cruel and extreme.

They fought about this until Odette turned 14. Her father thought she simply grew to realize what was wrong with her idea. Truth is Odette just hid the plans and worked on them in private.

But you know how curious Ákos is. He was bound to find a secret drawer. Years after Odett hid the plans there. And he doesn't like it.

Odette pleads with him to keep it a secret, but he doesn't want to. What he read was strange, and scary and so unlike her.

So Odette looks at this ten year old. The one she taught how to read, hugs him close, says "I'm sorry". Ákos relaxes. And Odette pushes him down into the abyss.

Odette tells everyone it was an accident. They were just playing and Ákos stumbled. She tried flying after him, to catch him, but to no avail. Everyone believes her.

She doesn't regret it. It was for her people. Anything for her people.

Still she tries distancing herself from her friends. It wouldn't be fair to them.

But, of course they don't let her go that easily.

A week after the incident Endre corners her in the library and confronts her, saying that it wasn't her fault and noone blames her.

And Odette knows it's not a fair question to Endre, but she still asks:

"If it was my fault would you still love me?"

And Endre, who thinks Odette saw his little brother stumble to his death despite her best efforts and is traumatized by that, of course says "Yes"

Weeks later Adél and Bendegúz disappear. A week after that they come back with Ákos.

Odette is glad that Ákos is safe, but still she doesn't regret what she did, and she'd do it again if she felt it was needed.

-

So that's what happened.

Everyone has varying levels of trust issues after this.

Endre, summoning flames into his palms: Are you sure your boyfriend would never hurt Aiden?

Henry standing before Callan: Yes, I am absolutely sure-

Endre: I WAS ALSO SURE!

Aiden just eating popcorn in the background.

Endre and Callan would like echother I think. They can trade ruler gossip. But they might need to get past... this first.

Also I'll tell you about Endre some other time, but know that Aiden and Endre would fight so much over who gets to adopt the other! Since they're the same age

I absolutely am! And damn am I invested in this now.

First off, I love Odette. I love her name and I can even understand her reasoning for what she did (though that doesn’t excuse shoving a literal child down an abyss)

I love characters that seem just so born to be rulers, that you know would do everything for their people, even if it’s not always the right thing.

I’m really curious though, what were her plans to destroy the black swamp? If even her father calls it cruel, I probably don’t want to know do I? 🙈

It must’ve been quite the shock for Ákos to find out about all that. And having to deal with the fact that she as someone he trusted pushed him into the abyss must be hard too. Poor thing.

I feel so sad for Endre too. Must be hard to be betrayed like this by a person he loves so much. I can see why he has trust issues afterwards. All of them, honestly. I hope they’ll still be okay.

I think if Callan manages to convince Endre that he doesn’t intend to harm anybody they’d get along quite well. They could complain about having to be the ones in charge.

And Aiden and Endre can declare each other their respective honorary brother, then everyone would be happy I think xD

[garden-of-omegas]

☘ THE DEVIL AT MY DOOR [DIAVOLO] ☘

┌── ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ••✎•• ──────────

characters: diavolo warnings: some references to bullying, witchcraft rating: sfw a/n: these first meeting one-shots are so short, hope you guys don't mind too much. i'll hopefully make longer ones in the future, or i might at some point switch how i make them.

~🎕

└── ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ••✎•• ──────────

you open the ragged door to the shack you and your mother call home, finding diavolo standing behind it with a cheerful smile. you frown, slamming the door in his face.

"mom! the devil's at the door!" you shout to your mother, who's brewing something in the kitchen.

"stop calling the mayor that, little dove!" she calls back, to which you scoff. that damn mayor is worse than the devil.

"that's not what i meant!" you shout back before opening the door again. diavolo's still there, waiting patiently. "mom's making love potions, you're gonna have to wait if you wanna talk to her."

diavolo tilts his head, being far too adorable for a literal demon. you don't trust it a bit. "i'm here for you, not your mother, [name]."

"..." you stare at diavolo, squinting a bit. "why?"

"i find you interesting!" diavolo answers. you scoff, but let him in anyways. diavolo happily follows behind you to the dangerous looking stairs standing in the middle of the living room.

"mom, i'm taking the devil to my bedroom!" you shout, and immediately hear something crash in the kitchen. you ignore it and lead diavolo upstairs to your room. diavolo curiously looks around, amazed by how cleanly white everything is. a few black details jump out at him, probably on purpose as they seem to be your personal defects.

"a curious room for a witch's child." diavolo comments, lifting up a small protection bottle sitting on the window pane.

"mom thinks that keeping my room white will make people think that i'm less weird. it doesn't really work, nobody's ever seen it before." you explain, sitting onto your bed. diavolo nods, setting down whatever he's fiddling with now.

you watch him look around, wondering what he's doing here. your initial meeting had been... awkward to say the least. you can't quite comprehend what he's want with you after that disaster.

"soo... want to help me make hex bags to throw at the old women in town?"

diavolo looks far too interested in your words for his own good.

"so, like, she's a total bitch! she keeps finding all my notebooks and writing false spells in them. they're not even convincing! if she wants to bully me she should do it better." you rant to diavolo while stringing up one of the hex bags. diavolo's been listening to your ranting about the people in town for the past two hours, nodding along like he understands anything that's going on. you don't think he does.

"so why are you throwing these at old women instead of this girl?" he asks.

"cause they insult mom, and that's something i won't allow. not on my watch." you point a finger at him for emphasis. "anyways, so last week brittany hid some sage in my locker, like that would get me expelled or something. she's absolutely the worst, so i've decided to trick her into thinking that i've cursed her, i just haven't decided how yet..."

you say goodbye to diavolo at your door, this time closing the door much softer and with a smile on your face. your mother comes out of her room, looking extremely confused.

"who was that?"

"the devil." you answer, not thinking much of it. your mother on the other hand suddenly looks extremely alarmed. "did you know he hates pickles? never would've thought the devil is a picky eater."

"...the mayor dislikes pickles?"

[science-lings]

what’s some of your favorite loz/Lu fics of all time? :)

Most of my favorite LU fics are here

but what you guys may not know is that I'm also a big fan of botw and modern au Zelink fics, however, take heed, most of these get a little spicy

Like Real People Do by ScarlettStorm: one of the best post-botw fics out there, lots of pining, I absolutely adore how Link's experience with Gender is portrayed, how he and Zelda are both treated as equally traumatized, as sometimes it feels like there's always one troubled one and one caregiver and I can get that for shorter fics but this one is long and beautifully balanced in that aspect. It also gets real horny at the end and in my opinion, it's very tasteful.

Alone With You by @deiliamedlini: honestly this author has a bunch of bangers, I'm waiting for their pirate au to finish so I can binge it all and I reread their Zelink oneshot collection all the time, this one is their modern high school au where Link is kind of a bad boy who is secretly Fucked Up, and Zelda is a popular girl and surprise surprise, they both get along really well. Normally I hate anything that reminds me of high school but this is the only exception. I love how previous characters are included, like how Link knows ASL bc he's friends with Pipit who is deaf and how Revali is a bitch and I still want to strangle him. Also big sister Aryll is a treasure and this fic does such a good job portraying Link's mental struggles and PTSD and how Zelda is being neglected and I'm also a big fan of the overarching plot of medical issues and trauma.

The Calamity of Link's Cargo Shorts by @zeldaseyebrows: I don't understand how someone can make smut so funny and so focused on Zelda's own self-hatred. Seriously though, there's a lot to love with this fic and I adore Zelda's pov. Sometimes you have to have sex before opening up emotionally and that's okay. Also, it's a modern au too, I just realized how many of these are modern aus.

Strangers in the Night by @zeldaelmo: Another modern au, this time Zelda has a kid from a ons with Link and he doesn't know about it for a bit, I just love Link being a dad and how they both work for a museum and there's just something about the courtroom scene that makes me want to reread it over and over again. Sometimes it's hit or miss with family ocs but Tetra is my favorite zelink child ever. All the fics on this list are ones I reread a lot but this one is the one I'm currently rereading bc it's been a few months lol. I love the domestic but also a little dysfunctional vibes, it's definitely not the normal romcom type of thing but I think I like this more.

K.K. Love Song by @airplanned: Again, modern au, pandemic edition. This one in particular has a certain unexplainable soft vibe, like there's some long-distance, Animal Crossing online romance and idk why I like it so much, I guess I was one of the suckers that got pulled in by new horizons when it came out so there's some strange kind of covid nostalgia and it's nice to see how a functional government would deal with the pandemic. Also, Link's grandma is a treasure and there's something sweet about crown princess Zelda meeting some guy on animal crossing and accidentally making him a public figure by dating him. Honestly, this author has a lot of great fics that I reread a lot lmao.

Farore's Day and Windvane Lane by Jenseits_der_Sterne: modern thanksgiving au, Zelda is a quirky scientist single mom and Link is her neighbor. I love Link being a nerd and Zelda being a bit of a disaster. Like she accidentally almost blows up her kitchen and he's just looking on with heart-eyes, after helping her put out the fires of course.

tbh, I'm probably not the best person to go for fic recs as I just find a few really good ones and then reread them till the end of time and rely on other people to recommend me things to read lmao, I hope this was at least a little helpful anyway.

[innerpalaces]

The Life of a Cannon Fodder Mother-in-Law - 33 Part 2

Chapter 33: The Deceived Mother-in-Law 33

Back in the present, after the Xu family discovered that they were being targeted, they quickly learned the culprit. Young Master Xu went to the Jiang family to negotiate. Father Jiang had discovered that Liu Huixin was very capable. Seeing that he could devour the Xu family, and the meat was already in his mouth, he would naturally not let go easily.

Father Xu also went to Liu Yuniang to negotiate: "Boss Liu, I have heard a little bit about the incident between Little Three (t/n: Father Xu is talking about Xu Kui here. 'Little Three' is an affectionate way of referring to him since he's the third son of the Xu family) and Cai Miao. I am also a parent, and I understand how worried you are about your child. They had a good relationship with each other, but have ended up like this. It's quite regrettable. How about... letting them reconcile?" Liu Yuniang smiled angrily: "My daughter is not in such a bad state that she needs me, her mother, to threaten others to treat her well. She is a very good girl. Your Xu family are blind and can't see it, but there are many sharp-eyed people in this world." This was not a lie. After Qi Cai Miao did business with her for several months, more than one person expressed his desire to marry her. However, after encountering such a thing, Qi Cai Miao felt that men in this world were not as reliable as money. If she had money like her mother, she naturally wouldn't have to worry about anything. This was true. When she was still just a daughter of the Qi family, no one came to propose to her. Now it was different. She can feel the admiration in the eyes of men. It was not the way they looked at a woman who needed to cling to a man to live, but that kind of rare respect and acknowledgement.

She enjoyed living like this and no longer wanted to be locked up in the backyard competing with other women and having to take care of the housework. Master Xu was silent for a moment. "It is said that marrying an unvirtuous wife will bring disaster to three generations. What my wife did... I am really sorry." He poured a cup of tea. "Today, I will use tea instead of wine to apologize to you and your daughter on behalf of my wife."

Liu Yuniang nodded: "I accept the apology. But if the Xu family wants me to stop, I absolutely cannot. The damage has been done, and it cannot be erased by an apology."

Master Xu thought that even if he could not be forgiven, he could at least win a little breathing space for his family because of their past relationship. He was silent again, before saying: "As far as I know, there is deep affection between Little Three and your daughter. It is said that it is better to demolish ten temples than to break up a marriage..."

Liu Yuniang interrupted him unceremoniously: "No one knows better than me how many grievances my daughter suffered when she was the wife of your Little Three. In order to break up their marriage, let alone demolishing ten temples, even if it is a hundred, I will demolish them! As long as my daughter can live comfortably for the second half of her life, even if I have to be a cow or a horse in my next life, I am willing to do so."

She stood up and said, "I will join forces with Master Jiang. I don't care what he is doing, I just want to get justice for my daughter!"

After saying that, she walked out. After this discussion, Master Xu finally understood how much he had offended others for the sake of the family's business and inheritance. He brought Madam Xu to the house to apologize. Liu Yuniang originally didn't want to meet the Xu family again, but when she heard Madam Xu had come, she suddenly became interested: "Madam Xu, you're a rare visitor. When you looked at me before, your eyes were raised to the sky. I thought you would never come to see me in your life." Madam Xu had been arrogant for many years and had never been ridiculed like this. In the past, she would have gotten angry, but now the situation was different, and she could only suppress the anger in her heart. "My son's mother-in-law..." Liu Yuniang raised her hand. "Don't address me like that. My daughter is still unmarried and can't afford this title." Madam Xu pursed her lips. "I wronged Cai Miao in the past. I came here today to apologize. We have been family for a long time, and I am willing to make it up to her. We can discuss whatever conditions you have."

"I don't want to discuss it," Liu Yuniang said with a smile. "I'm satisfied seeing you unhappy." Madam Xu: "...Why are you so cruel?" "It's not as cruel as watching your eldest daughter-in-law poisoning your third daughter-in-law with cold eyes." Liu Yuniang looked her up and down: "You have such a good mind. You don't like your eldest daughter-in-law, so you coax her to harm others... But what your intentions are has nothing to do with me. I only know that my daughter is innocent. The Xu family can't distinguish right from wrong, and your family's methods are corrupt. It's better for a family like yours to be ruined as soon as possible."

These words stung the Xu couple, and they were very angry. The two of them could also see that Liu Huixin had no intention of letting them go. If they begged again, they would only make themselves more shameful and embarrassed. So the two families parted ways unhappily again. After that, Liu Yuniang was even more ruthless. It's worth mentioning that at this time, the Jiang family seemed to have accepted some benefits from the Xu family and stopped their attacks. The alliance between Liu Yuniang and the Jiang family was a verbal agreement without any written evidence. This kind of thing was just a matter of mutual consent. Liu Yuniang did not blame Master Jiang. She simply introduced a new material, collected another wave of money, and intensified the attack on the Xu family. The Xu family thought that after the Jiang family stopped taking action, the Liu mother and daughter wouldn't be able to hold on for long, but they didn't expect Liu Yuniang to be so powerful. Seeing that his family's shops were closing one after another because they couldn't sell their goods, and the clerks were quitting one by one, Xu Kui came to the gate again at the request of his parents. The last time he came was when he was bitten by a dog. It was also at that time that he saw clearly what mother and daughter were thinking, and he refused to come forward to bother them again. It was the same now. He knew that his family was in a desperate situation, but he never thought of coming to ask for help. If his parents hadn't nearly knelt down, he wouldn't have come this time. The difference from before was that this time Liu Yuniang invited him in. This rare courtesy made Xu Kui's already dead heart move again. Looking at the scenery in the garden, he suddenly realized that the mother and daughter's yard was much larger than the last time he came. They must have bought the left and right yards and opened them up. He couldn't help but ask: "It's so spacious now?" The maid glanced at him and said: "The boss said that the reason to make money is to make yourself comfortable, especially in food, clothing, housing, and transportation." Obviously there was an implication behind these words, and Xu Kui's face was hot when he heard it. In the past, when Qi Cai Miao was his wife, because his mother had cut back on expenses, their food and accommodations were not very good, so Cai Miao often had to use her dowry to supplement her expenses. Back then, she vaguely mentioned it a few times. At that time, he left early in the morning and came home late, rarely ate at home, and the matter didn't affect him much so he forgot it after hearing it.

In the main hall, both mother and daughter were present. As soon as Xu Kui entered, his eyes fell on Qi Cai Miao: "Cai Miao, how are you doing lately?" Qi Cai Miao asked him, "You're looking at me now; does anything seem wrong?" Whether it was energy or spirit, she seemed to be doing well. The makeup on her face was much better than when she was in the Xu family, her eyes were much sharper now, and she was no longer as gentle as before. Xu Kui felt a little strange seeing her like this: "Where are the children?" "They're well. They're practicing calligraphy with the teacher today, so they don't have time to see you." Qi Cai Miao said casually: "If you came to beg for mercy, you don't have to open your mouth. My mother won't stop, and I won't plead for you."

Xu Kui asked without hope, "For the sake of the children, can't you?" Qi Cai Miao shook her head: "It was actually my idea to see you today. I just wanted to see how blind I was before to actually think you were a good person."

Xu Kui fell silent, before: "Am I not good?" Qi Cai Miao sneered. She shook her head and said, "Let's not talk about anything else. Was it your decision to come here today?" No! Xu Kui had failed to convince her to come back before, and he knew that he owed her, so he planned not to come bother her again. Because he wanted to keep the good memories between the two of them, and if they met too much, the good things would eventually be washed away. If they didn't meet, he could at least deceive himself that they separated because of his mother's actions, not because their relationship was bad.

He didn't answer, but his expression said it all. Qi Cai Miao shook her head again: "Look, you will never fight for yourself in front of your parents. As your wife, I am also the one who is always wronged. They are your parents, and it is your business if you are willing to compromise. But I am also my mother's treasure at home, so why should I be wronged to death for you? How can you constantly let your wife be harmed like this?"

Xu Kui once again clearly realized his mistake, but giving in to his parents was a habit engraved in his bones and he could not change it at all. He was unwilling to accept it: "I am sincere to you." Qi Cai Miao said unceremoniously: "You are not the only one who is sincere to me in this world. Compared with them, your sincerity is just lip service. Why should I choose you?" Walking out of the Liu family gate, Xu Kui seemed to have lost his soul. The people around him shouted several times, but he didn't hear them. After returning home, he packed his bags the next day and left, going somewhere far from his parents. He never returned for the rest of his life. When a tree falls, the monkeys scatter. The Xu family's shaky tree was about to fall, and the steward and employees were running away as soon as they could. It became increasingly clear that the Xu family was in dire straits. One steward stole goods out of anger because he couldn't get his wages, and in a panic, he lit the warehouse on fire... This fire was the last straw for the Xu family. The Xu family had been in business for many years, and there were many dandy children in the family. The victims who were bullied by them in the past did not dare to say anything due to the Xu family's power. Now, seeing the decline of the Xu family, they all went to the Yamen to complain. After this incident, the reputation of the Xu family plummeted. The Xu couple came to beg for help again, but Liu Yuniang refused to see them. She heard that the Xu family father and son blamed Madam Xu for all their mistakes and wanted to give her a letter of divorce. Madam Xu has been arrogant for many years, so naturally she was not willing to accept it. During the argument, she seemed to have been injured quite seriously, and died soon after. Later she heard that Madam Xu's death was suspicious and the father and son were under investigation for a long time. Although it was later found out that Madam Xu really died of her injuries, the two of them lost most of their spirit after this disaster. Later, they made a living by setting up a stall in the outer city, and their lives were extremely difficult. Qi Hechen stayed in the Yamen taking the county exam for a few days and fell asleep as soon as he got on the carriage. When he got home, the doctor was already waiting for him. After having his pulse checked and drinking medicine, as well as two bowls of soup, he was about to fall asleep when he saw his father coming in from outside. Qi Zhengming had a serious look on his face: "Don't sleep, I have something to tell you." The county examination was particularly difficult. Answering questions, eating, drinking, and sleeping were all done in a small space. Qi Hechen had never suffered like this since he was a child. Hearing this, he became a little impatient: "Hurry up and tell me."

"It's about your wife." Qi Zhengming told him everything he found out. "She calculated quite deeply. She had a hand in Rumeng's death, and Liu Chanchan's attack on her was also part of her calculations." After hearing these things, Qi Hechen completely woke up: "Could it be fake?" What he really wanted to ask was whether Liu Huixin just wanted them to believe this. "I also hoped it was fake." Qi Zhengming sighed: "She... can't have children. You are about to become a scholar, and you can't spoil your concubine and kill your wife. What will happen to the children of our Qi family in the future? What's worse is that your grandfather found out this morning." Qi Zhengming wiped his face and said, "He asked me to find a new wife for you." Originally, the old couple didn't care whether they had legitimate children, but Liu Huixin left so decisively. Things happened one after another at home, and in the final analysis, it was all because Qi Hechen was an illegitimate son. If he was Liu Huixin's biological child, how could these things happen?

Therefore, the old couple agreed that such chaos could not happen again and they would nip such things in the bud. Qi Hechen asked in surprise: "How?"

Qi Zhengming looked at him indifferently: "Don't you want to avenge Liu Chanchan and your mother?" Hearing this, Qi Hechen felt a chill in his heart: "But no matter how many things she did, she never wronged me..." "Nonsense!" Qi Zhengming slapped his son on the head: "You are so stupid. She harmed your heir! As a legitimate wife, she should protect your concubine and illegitimate children, but what did she do? Such a woman, you actually still think she is good? Why did I give birth to a fool like you?" He and Cheng Rumeng had been in a relationship for many years. Although, at the end, everything about her seemed bad when she was alive, now that she was dead he only thought of the good things. Qi Zhengming regretted it when he learned that she had been murdered. Especially when it came to not burying her properly at that time... Qi Zhengming regretted it. When a person regrets, they want to make amends, such as giving her a good burial, or helping her take revenge. That morning, when Zhao Zhenyan woke up and vomited black blood, she suddenly understood what had happened. She looked at her pale face in the mirror. Her mind went blank, and after a long while, she smiled. Qi Hechen, who was on the bed, expected her to question him. He was thinking about how to cover it up, but when he saw her smiling, his heart trembled. "Yan'er, let me call a doctor for you." Zhao Zhenyan looked at him in the mirror: "Husband, I realized that I was very wrong. To rip out your heart and soul for a heartless person is simply asking for death. " Qi Hechen was panicking. "I don't understand what you mean. I'd better hurry up and call the doctor." "I've been drinking soup in the morning these past few days." She looked at the door and ordered, "Go and make another bowl of blood-replenishing soup." The maid outside responded and left. Zhao Zhenyan looked out the window: "Mom is a smart person. Getting involved in the quagmire of your Qi family will only make you smell bad, and you will never be able to escape. It's a pity that I only see it now." She felt the pain in her chest getting worse and worse, and because of this, she didn't feel the need to call a doctor. If the doctor came, it would only add to her disappointment. Qi Hechen looked unhappy: "Don't say that... Yan'er, you vomited blood. This is very abnormal. Maybe someone poisoned you. Let's see a doctor first." "In this family, the only ones who can poison me are you and your father." Zhao Zhenyan smiled bitterly: "Qi Hechen, how have I let you down?" Qi Hechen fell silent: "I am the one who let you down." Zhao Zhenyan looked at him for a long time, carefully dressed up in front of the vanity table, made an elegant bun for herself, and put on her most beautiful jewelry. There was a knock on the door. She stood up and took the bowl of soup herself. She secretly dipped her fingers that were stained by the ink jade jewelry on the vanity table into the soup. Then, she brought the bowl of soup to Hechen: "Husband, we are a married couple, but I probably have to leave first. Drink this bowl of soup so I won't have any regrets, okay?" Her eyes were full of expectation, without any hint of blame.

Qi Hechen pursed his lips. "Yan'er, I'm sorry." Zhao Zhenyan shook her head: "I was too cruel, and it would have happened sooner or later. I don't blame you." After hearing this, Qi Hechen felt extremely guilty, and he drank the bowl of soup after accepting it from her. He had an attack very quickly. Almost immediately after drinking the soup, he felt as if his stomach was burning and his throat was sore. He coughed a few times and then vomited blood. He looked at the blood with disbelief on his face: "You...when did you poison me?" The maid was obviously from the Qi family, and this was freshly made soup. He watched her bring it in with his own eyes. It can't be tampered with. The only opportunity was the few steps she took. She couldn't stand, and neither could he. Zhao Zhenyan looked at his face and said, "Husband, I paid for your talent. How could I let you live alone?" Qi Hechen was speechless and vomited out one mouthful of blood after another. When the Qi family arrived, the two of them were already lying in a pool of blood. The elders of the Qi family were very old. When they saw that the grandson they had such high hopes for was gone, they immediately fainted. The Old Master could not be saved. Old Madam Qi woke up, but she was paralyzed. From then on, the Qi family gradually declined. Qi Zhengming could not make money, and only drank and got drunk. The family's house and shop were completely destroyed within two years. Finally, Qi Zhengming took his mother to live in a shabby courtyard. He got drunk all day long and was immersed in wine all year round. He was less than fifty but lived like he was 100 years old. Later, when the old madam disappeared, he regretted it and drank more and more. Later, there was a drunken lunatic on the street who was always delirious and was often insulted and driven away.

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[agentrouka-blog]

Criticising Dany, Jon and Robb as leaders is right but then pretending somehow Sansa will be a better leader than them is outright nonsense. We cannot judge Sansa on her leadership because we haven't even seen leading anything except when she calms the ladies during the battle which is admirable but could have been also easily done by a well meaning noble woman. Cersei is just too misanthropic.

There are two books left and we could see Sansa as a leader and how she has to deal with more serious stuff managing the food crisis, settling disputes etc. This is just within the space of being a Lady. Being a queen adds even more responsibilities. Even in the Vale, she puts no interest towards the food situation and how the prices are meant to be driven. Granted Baelish doesn't tell her but it also doesn't pique her curiosity at all. Robb, Jon and Dany fuck up many times but there is no definitive proof that Sansa also might not end up making big leadership disasters even if her intentions are well meant when considering the big picture. The child leaders like Robb, Jon and Dany are faced with insurmountable tasks. Rebuilding a new economy or trying to create a truce between Northerners and freefolk despite having centuries of bloodshed or trapped between your lords and wanting to save your sisters - they are not easy feat though I have simplified what Dany, Jon and Robb have to do.

Yes Sansa hasn't made any grey decision like the other three till now but she also hasn't been granted that kind of power to make those big mistakes or fucking up on that grand scale. You are trying to tell me no monarch ever fucked up. We don't know whether how good Sansa will be as a leader. Maybe she will be better than the three but it's equally possible she could botch up things more tha the three.

It would be really helpful if you could let me know which of my posts you're referring to, actually, because I don't think I've ever specifically said that Sansa is going to be "a better leader than Robb and Jon" (I'll accept the charge on Dany because we won't see Sansa do any of that nonsense.) Nor have I ever said that no monarch has ever made mistakes. But there's mistakes and then there's hypocritical cruelty. Jon makes mistakes - and he will be saved from what should be certain death because the narrative values his approach beyond those mistakes. Robb made the kinds of choices that GRRM put a final - tragic - lid on. Let's see about Dany, shall we?

I have specifically speculated that GRRM may give us an example of Sansa trying and failing at something more ambitious during the conclusion of her Vale arc, or that her lie about Marillion may come with short-term costs to her credibility. Seeing her deal with that is going to be fun!

That said, geez, yes, there's two books left with the actual endgame slowly shaping up now, you'd think maybe seeing what Sansa's learning arc has resulted in might be part of that? No, we don't know yet! That's the literal point of it being unfinished. But there's enough writing on the wall to make educated guesses about where GRRM may want to take it.

I'll keep on criticising Robb (enthusiastically), or Jon (kindly), or pointing at Dany with a big red arrow saying "absolutely not like that". I think GRRM absolutely encourages us to.

And I'll keep speculating about Sansa as Queen in the North too.

You absolutely don't have to like it. I like it enough for the both of us.

[walnutcookie]

hello there mister almond sir i just read your Misfortune infodump and i. am intrigued. i would like to hear more pretty please /nf

MISFORTUNE RANT PART 2💥💥 THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS ASK BWAAA/GEN ...

part 1 here

so . Unfortunately i am a sucker for fluff and also capchat so that is precisely the ending my fanon gets HXVDKDB

langue comes to visit cappu in her office the day after he saw misfortune again and finds her like half dead with a hangover and theyre like Hey. What the fuck happened. shes a little hesitant because yknow not everyone will believe you when you say theres a giant 10 foot raven inside of you!! but he tells langue EVERYTHING and based on what cappu tells them. They believe her!! they are horrified and greatly disgusted (thhey dont like the thought of a giant bird covered in blood crawling in and out of cappus mouth so they make her swish out his mouth before they kiss him /hj)

but langue is a stubborn fuck. a perfectionist and an overachiever. they are going to fight misery itself just to prove they can. So!! misfortune feeds off of cappuccino being miserable? then they just have to make her life As good and lovely as possible so that he never feels miserable. or at least not enough for it to feed off of her

they manage to convince their parents (who were never very fond of cappu and just saw her as a bad influence for their precious lovely child) to let cappu move in with them temporarily and they quickly start to adore him because Of Course They Do. Langue is going to nag him about every little thing until he Actually Does It so eventually they manage to get him a proper sleep schedule, wean her off of cigarettes, heavily cut her daily coffee intake, and most importantly keep her from being isolated so often. Love wins !

obviously it takes a loong time and misfortune is NOT happy that this little fuck is managing to ignore all of the disasters its causing (falling furniture. fires. shattered windows. anything it can manage to do) and somehow not die from any of it and eventually They succeed ! Cappuccino is actually happy! even though misfortune still tries to make her life a living hell she now has support from langue AND their parents and so shes able to actually push through and recover from his bad luck instead of just having to sit there and endure it (or desperately find ways to escape it)

right now the silly ending is misfortune senses a very very miserable being walking down the street and goes to hide in them instead but it turns out it was ROGUEFORT and misfortune has thousands of year old beef with their sentient cloak goddess (lupine) and it escapes heavily weakened.

it is so itty bitty now. but it has found that movie theaters produce a good amount of misery for it to feed off of and it lives in there now lol. Diversity win! The spirit of misfortune likes popcorn!

this is all just a silly ending though idk if its canon or not . Either way misfortune leaves cappu and finds another victim HXBDKFB

meanwhile cappu is FUCKING DYING!!! It clawed its way out of his chest since it no longer cared if she died or not and had no use for her it just left her to die. Thankfully it was in langues house so he was rushed to a hospital as soon as langue saw her with his chest literally wide open (they frew up) and Cappu Survived!!!!

thats basically it HXVDKF cappu rides in a car while conscious for the first time in years when langues parents drive her home from the hospital and he is an Anxious Mess because of how many accidents hes been in and how its caused her to be absolutely terrified of cars. but langue is there to hold his hand and. um. yeah just kind of hold her hand because they are AWFUL at comforting people. But their parents try to say some comforting things !!! poor thang is trembling

if anyone has any questions i would love to answer :3!! i love this silly raven thang so much