#artemis fowl the last guardian

[brams-stupid-thoughts]

Artemis fowl was DEAD and he came back to life with NO MEMORIES and NO ONE CARES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE WON’T EVEN REMEMBER HOW HIS PARENTS TREATED HIM GROWING UP (BASICALLY NEGLECT I THINK??)

[checkoutmybookshelf]

From Criminial Mastermind to Fairy Tale Hero: The End of Artemis Fowl

Here we are, everyone: The final Artemis Fowl book. It has been a journey revisiting the first series I was old enough to follow and fandom, and it's wild to me that we're finally at the end. Especially since I picked up the first Artemis Fowl book in late elementary school (I'm genuinely not sure when though, because the first book came out in April of 2001, when I was in fifth grade and it's very possible I didn't pick the book up until sixth grade, which would have put me at 11, same age as Artemis in that first book) and the final book came out in 2012, when I was in my junior year of undergrad. So at that point, Artemis, Holly, and Butler had been part of my life for a long time. And now here we are, to say goodbye to them again after this leisurely re-listen/read. Let's talk Artemis Fowl: The Last Guardian.

Artemis grew and changed so much across eight books, which makes sense because holy cow do kids change a LOT between 11 and 15. We get so busy living life in those years that we don't really think about how much we truly learn and grown between prepubescence and full-on teenagerhood, but that is a time of massive change, and I think that more than anything else really justifies how Artemis goes from a chillingly vampiric child to a teenager with enough compassion and empathy to understand that sometimes the right choice is a heroic self-sacrifice for the people that your people (both humans and the people, in this case) love. Artemis also did a really interesting version of that thing so many teenagers do where they hit a point where they can't just phone in their abilities anymore and have to actually put effort in, but for Artemis it was emotional rather than intelligence. And yet even when making said heroic sacrifice, we have the absolutely beautiful callback to the end of book one, where Artemis drugs his mother, Butler, and Juliet to keep them from being harmed by the bio-bomb. To stop Holly from preventing him from stopping Opal, Artemis sedates her. The more things change, the more they stay the same...

Except where best villain ever Opal Koboi is concerned. By this book, Opal is so disconnected from reality that she is willing to risk literally going nuclear to escape captivity, and then just...casually sparks off the apocalypse because if there is one thing our girl wants, it's to be Empress of the World, and if that means using spirit zombies and an ancient fairy doomsday device, then I guess it's a good thing she's already versed in black magic. Or something. Opal is fully and completely off the rails at this point, and if you catch yourself referring to yourself as "Mommy" in reference to the spirits of several scores of ancient elven berserkers who would--barring a geas--murder you for it, you might want to stop and take a long, hard look at your life choices. And maybe don't forget that you've cloned yourself, because that's the kind of little detail that can completely ruin your chances of being Empress of the World.

Holly quite possibly deserves every medal that exists for managing to drag Artemis's extremely out-of-shape butt through increasingly dangerous and high-stakes missions while navigating fairy politics and *checks notes* breaking up with her commanding officer after a disastrous date where they both got kicked out of a crunchball match. (And once again...HOW DARE Colfer leave this in exposition and not show us this amazing disaster of a date!?!?) Holly has also just been through the emotional wringer with Artemis and every time he decided to double-cross or lie by omission to bring off a plan and every time he does something infuriatingly human that drives up her blood pressure and yet makes the mission succeed. And then she has to sit there and watch him die to save humans and fairies. Seriously, the fact that Holly Short is a functional being rather than a hot mess is nothing short of a miracle.

And then we come to Butler. Long-suffering, super fucking over it, broken-hearted Domovoi Butler. Artemis got DAMN lucky that the whole "put my spirit in a clone of me" plan panned out, because if it hadn't, Holly was entirely correct: Butler would never have recovered. Butler and Opal might be my two favorite characters in the entire series at this point. That's not where I started--for a very long time, Holly was my favorite character, and Commander Root still gets an honorable mention--but as a grown-ass adult (I'm not doing that math for you, if you want to know that I'm old, you do the math), I cannot escape how dedicated, competent, kind, and just AWESOME Butler is. I feel like the vibe here is very similar to the thing that happens when you watch Sound of Music as a kid and either Maria or one of the kids is your favorite character, but when you come back to it as an adult, Captain Von Trapp is EVERYTHING (RIP Christopher Plummer, we loved you). Butler has a similar vibe but in a different genre.

So, I was an adult and had enough experience of watching fandoms to see the mixed reactions to this book being released. People were sad the series was ending, people were disappointed because the series had seemingly drifted, and people loved it. My reaction was pretty mixed, because I had a lot going on, I knew there were good things here but I was also kind of missing the heisty, criminal mastermind vibes, but also OPAL KOBOI. So I was pretty unsure how to feel about this book when it came out, and then I didn't reread it for literal years because I went to grad school.

Returning to this book now, I have suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuch respect for how Colfer tied up the series and how he pulled off a new Irish mythological cycle, but updated for the twenty-first century. I have enough life on me to appreciate the changes Artemis goes through, and enough literature degrees to have a new and deeply fulfilling perspective on the series structure. Last Guardian is not my favorite book of the series--it's not even in the top three--but I think that what it does is genuinely impressive and I love how you can finish this book and go instantly back into the OG Artemis Fowl. The story does not, strictly speaking, have to end. And that is a vibe I can 100% get behind.

I deeply love the Artemis Fowl books, and I cannot recommend the series enough. They have so many strengths, are incredibly well-written, and they live rent-free in my head even now as an adult.

[seabeescribbles]

The End(?)

[liznfin]

Coincidentally Day 5 of Fowlfest: Favorite Scene and our adieu from the books with Mulch just absolutely freeballing it in The Last Guardian

It’s been a blast peeking into the fandom for a short period of time (and who knows maybe we’ll reemerge every now and then to revisit the series) but for now Liz n’ Fin gotta go and take a look at some other series for book club. As always we’re always on the hunt for good recommendations!

[af-answers]

Since Artemis was cloned he lost holly's eye so only Holly has artemis's eye....my question is to Holly...does it feel strange having artemis's eye but he not having yours?

Holly: It is strange-- so strange, I had to talk through it in therapy. On one hand, it feels like a connection is gone. Artemis is renewed, reborn, looking to the future, while I have to look the past in the eye-- pun intended-- every day. I felt lonely, like I'd been left behind, again. On the other hand, I wasn't left behind. When Artemis Prime (as Foaly calls him) died, a part of me literally died with him. I blamed myself for his death for a while, until Foaly pointed out that Artemis had been experimenting with fairy magic for so long at that point, the curse would have taken him even without the elf eye. In which case, I'm glad some part of me followed him into the grave. It's a weird sort of closure, I guess.

What's weirder than only having one eye in the world, though, is having three. Artemis and I have both had a lot of eye-related therapy.

Mod: Other eye-related posts can be found here and here.

[grass-and-citrus]

Hi yall, long time no post!

Here's a quick little watercolor I made in effort to break some major art block.

I think I'll always be fixated on the orange rose imagery from TLG 🌹🧡

[indyviree]

GUYS I FINISHED ARTEMIS FOWL TwT

I DONT KNOW WHAT TO READ NOWWW- I LOVE ARTY TOO MUCH

[shortace]

Four year old Myles Fowl telling Artemis "I'm not three, for heaven's sake" has the exact same vibe as 16 year old Arial telling her dad she's not a child anymore.

[cantheywinthehungergames]

@rockett-to-the-purple-moon

Tribute Name: Artemis Fowl II

Age: 12-15 (biologically)

Restrictions: Can only use tools and weapons supplied in the Hunger Games arena

If you would like to see a character aged 12-18 enter the Hunger Games, please submit them through my asks. 19+ aged character submissions are currently closed.

Please also look at my pinned post for submission rules as well as a list of previously submitted characters prior to submitting your character.

[astraeajackson]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARTEMIS FOWL YOU ABSOLUTE GENIUS AND MY RELUCTANTLY REFORMED CRIMINAL MASTERMIND NO MATTER WHAT MYLES SAYS HE WILL NEVER BE BETTER THAN YOU POOKIE YOU'VE BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH SO ENJOY YOUR FIVE YEARS CHILLING IN SPACE WITH BUTLER

FAV ARTEMIS FOWL QUOTE: if i win, i'm a prodigy. if i lose, then i'm crazy. that's the way history is written.

[irunaki]

cry

[checkoutmybookshelf]

Re-listening to Artemis Fowl and the Last Guardian to wrap my reviews of the Artemis Fowl series and uh...

Yeah, yeah I had definitely forgotten about the berserker zombie spirits buried below Fowl Manor.

This is gonna be a TRIP.

[seabeescribbles]

Here's my art that Pisces_Pixie on Ao3 made a fanfic based on for the concept of Artemis getting permanently scarred by the troll in the first book, and having to live with his face disfigured for the rest of them. I'm not tagging this as gore because it's art of a scar, people can just have those. Also that would be super ironic

Not sure whether my version of Artemis would still die in the last book. There are a few changes that I would make if I was writing the story, but Pisces did a fantastic job with their preferred version of events

[alma-n]

Have some last guardian crap

[artemisfowl-ii]

Just remember that Beckett Fowl almost killed Opal Koboi herself with one single hit

[grass-and-citrus]

Hi yall, long time no post!

Here's a quick little watercolor I made in an effort to break some major art block.

I think I'll always be fixated on the orange rose imagery from TLG🌹 🧡