#but she also cannot stand bullying and will physically and mentally destroy any bullies

[chmydarling]

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[musicfeedsmysoul12]

fic title: the girl with flowers in her bones

Izumi learns she has a Quirk age six when the weird bump on her shoulder is inspected by a doctor who cuts it open to reveal a pretty flower.

Said flower quickly changed and becomes deadly, nearly killing a nurse before it’s destroyed.

No one knows how it got there but now people know about it. At first Izumi is happy. She has a Quirk.

Then she isn’t.

“It’s a useless Quirk!” Kacchan taunts her. “Perfect for a useless girl like you! Flowers under the skin! Pathetic!”

Kacchan burns her shoulder and she goes home crying.

Later a flower develops where she’s been burned and after some quiet conversation with Inko about how her husband had left because of Izumi’s Quirkless status and Izumi had heard it, they figured it out.

The flowers bloom when someone hurts her. They bloom and the doctors do a scan revealing many more flowers all over her- some were small and no one could see them. Little hurts the doctors theorized.

They still had to be removed. Izumi has been getting slower, becoming more exhausted each day. It’s the flowers.

Izumi numbly lets it happen.

But it happens again. And again.

Flowers bloom because people keep hurting her. They turn deadly when exposed to the air.

“Freak, monster, liar-“ it’s all shouted at her by her class. Kacchan leads the charge.

His flowers are always an orange lily. Hatred.

Izumi wonders if it means him or her who hates the other. When it becomes a sweet pea, she has a feeling she knows why she is receiving a goodbye.

She stops growing flowers for him. Because she knows she will only get pain from him, because he is no longer one she believes to be a friend.

“The flowers are signs of betrayal,” she changes the classification. “I can only be hurt by those I do not think would hurt me, those I trust. Once I stop trusting or believing they will not hurt me the flowers stop.”

Her mother sobs upon hearing it. Inko then goes and terrifies the Bakugou family, promising that unless Kacchan leaves her alone Inko would go after them.

Kacchan doesn’t listen.

So Inko slaps them with a lawsuit she wins. It’s enough for Izumi to go to a new school where she sits quietly and doesn’t talk.

There people whisper still but it’s sad whispers.

“Her Quirk hurts her.”

“No, it’s people hurting her which sets off her Quirk.”

“She’s so quiet.”

Izumi just works. The only one she trusts is her mother. Inko who tries so hard not to hurt her, who is honest and open. Who gives her books on flowers and smiles.

When Inko hurts Izumi she leaves violets and lavender. And they’re always small, so small. Small hurts, being too honest with her daughter.

Izumi loves her mother for it.

Izumi grows and soon she finds herself applying for UA. She wants to be a hero and her mother frets and admits she isn’t sure if Izumi can do but the two have researched and researched and well, they think they can figure a way out. Sports festival- she just needs to beat all the other students.

She thinks she can. The money they won from the lawsuit had helped Izumi not only get into a new school but also got her into a martial arts studio. Her mother insisted.

Probably was upset with how many flowers Izumi grew from cuts and burns and bruises. Those were the bigger ones, when they were left on purpose. They pushed against the skin, looked strange.

Funny, Izumi noticed that she didn’t gain flowers sparring.

“It’s probably based on intention. When you gain flowers from bruises or cuts and they’re from people doing it to hurt you and betray you, they come as flowers. But when it’s done as a fight or a spar it’s on purpose still but it’s not a betrayal of yourself.” Her Quirk therapist theorizes.

It makes sense.

Izumi goes to UA after failing the entrance exam and ends up in 1C where she finds herself meeting a boy who is like her. Sharp and broken and hurt.

Shinsou is a friend and she finds herself chuckling at his comments.

Their friendship only blooms truly though when she meets Kacchan again. He sees her and attacks, screaming. She fights back. Shinsou speaks and stops Kacchan and Izumi looks at him, seeing something similar back.

The situation ends with Izumi in the principal’s office telling her story. She looks him in the eyes tiredly.

Kacchan is removed from UA- apparently, the lawsuit hadn’t been included in his application.

“It was when he was ten!” His mother tries.

“It still happened and you lied,” Nezu tells her. Izumi isn’t supposed to be there but she went to the office to pick up some papers.

She thinks her homeroom teacher arranged it.

“The papers are supposed to show us if we need to watch out students for anything. You lied on the application.”

Izumi doesn’t know what to think as she slides away. She hasn’t seen Kacchan in years. Hasn’t spoken to him.

Yet he still tried to attack her. He hasn’t learned anything.

Izumi has left him behind. The pain he caused ended any relationship between them.

He is a child. He can learn, if he wishes.

She feels as if she is choking when she runs into someone.

“Ah,” the person says and she blinks at a girl with red and white hair. It’s long and in a braid as she stares at Izumi. There’s a burn scar on her face and as Izumi looks into her eyes she sees the same sort of pain Izumi has.

The girl nods and leaves and Izumi stares after her in confusion.

Then she has to head to class and Shinsou and it’s a mess.

A flower blooms under her cheek as she speaks and she wonders if it’s from the shock someone attacked her at UA or it’s because she always hoped Kacchan would change the longer she left him.

“It’s not the same.” She tells Shinsou. “I was in hell until I was ten and then just isolated after.”

“It’s close,” Shinsou tells her. He touches her cheek and she closes her eyes. “It’s growing?”

“Yeah. It used to be orange lilies. It might be the same now.”

It is. It’s removed by Recovery Girl and Izumi breathes and doesn’t try to think.

She doesn’t know what to think about anything.

She thinks in a way that expelling him was to much. She understands that they lied, that they removed the evidence of the trial. But did they truly know that it counted?

Kacchan is a child and needs to learn things.

At the same time, he tried to attack her.

Her mind feels muddled and confused and Shinsou tries to help but it’s different for him. His bullies were cruel and never stopped and yet he never expected it either to stop.

You can only be betrayed by a friend.

He tries but they fight and eventually he yells that she’s worthless if she wishes to let a boy who hurts her back into UA.

She flinches and he does too.

Shinsou reaches for her but she leaves, feeling sick.

Izumi wanders UA campus after that- a week after the Kacchan incident- a week after the USJ got invaded. With Kacchan in the office the class hadn’t gone to USJ, something all of them expresses relief about.

Izumi wanders and then runs into the red and white girl again. She’s training in the gym that all students are allowed to Izumi wandered to it out of habit. Usually she and Shinsou train- Shinsou finally accepting that he needs to train his body.

He’s not with her though, and she feels her shoulder ache.

Shinsou didn’t mean it, he was angry and didn’t understand. Izumi gets it.

But it still was a hurt.

“... are you okay?” The girl asks and Izumi blinks, realizing she’s been standing in the gym staring off into space.

“I’m fine.” She says. “I got into a fight with my friend.” The girl looks at her and Izumi sighs.

“My Quirk lets me know when I’ve been hurt,” Izumi explains. “The hurts become flowers under my skin. Ever hurt, physical, emotional, mental, minor or major.” Izumi sighs.

“... you were the one Bakugou attacked, the reason we did not go to the USJ.,” The girl says calmly.

“We were friends once. He hurt me badly, and we stopped. He tried again, my mom sued him and his family and they didn’t put the trial in his transcripts. So he’s been expelled and I just… I feel bad for him. He’s hurt me but I cared for him once and is it fair that he was a child when this happened and he’s still himself a child?” Izumi sighs. “Sorry. I-“

“I have similar feelings to my brother and mother.” The girl offers. Her face is slightly blank. She looks at Izumi, cocking her head slightly. “My father is not a nice man and he’s only stopped hurting us due to blackmail my eldest brother has given. I’m under the custody of my second eldest brother. My other siblings were deemed unsuited and my mother is in a mental health institute.”

“Oh!” Izumi blinks. “You didn’t-“

“You told me.” The girl shrugs. “I’m Todoroki Shouto.”

“Midoriya Izumi.”

It’s the start of something.

From the hurt Shinsou dealt jasmine is dug from Izumi’s skin and he apologizes over and over again. She tells him it’s not okay but she understands he didn’t truly mean it.

It makes her sad still.

She and Todoroki meet from time to time in the gym, speaking. Sometimes Shinsou joins them, sometimes not. He wishes to keep his Quirk private, wishing to get into the hero course like Izumi wishes.

Todoroki is kind, Izumi finds. She’s standoffish and blunt but she’s kind.

Her story is a sad one, told over gym meetings. Her father is Endeavour and he wished to overcome All Might. He had children to force it, and the abuse he placed his family through broke her mother.

Todoroki loves her mother. She loves her dearly but cannot face her.

“I used to blame myself, thinking it might be my fault she burned me. Natsuo, my brother, he got me into therapy and I’ve learned it wasn’t. I was a child, it was not on me. And yet my mother is ill.” Todoroki explains. “I care deeply for her but… I can’t face her right now. Because I have learned it is not my fault what she did and I have to adjust.”

Her brother, her eldest brother Touya, is a different story.

“He blamed me for the abuse. Said it was all my fault, hated the fact I was a girl too. Kept going on I was a screw-up, that I was disgusting. He’s in therapy to now but… I don’t talk to him. Ever if I can help it. Natsuo says he’s getting better but he won’t make me do anything. My sister keeps trying to get us to forgive our dad. We don’t want to.” Todoroki tells her. “It’s a mess.”

Todoroki doesn’t know what to do herself. Her brother was young when he became angry, and her mother ill. Neither were fully at fault, and yet she struggles.

It’s nice to talk to someone who understands.

Their friendship grows and Izumi wonders why it feels different then from her and Shinsou.

Yet as she watches Todoroki smile, she thinks she knows.

At the sports festival, Izumi and Shinsou manage to get to the tournament. They manage to claw their way to the semi-finals, determining who will go on to compete for first.

Shinsou insults her, curses her. And then he confesses.

Izumi keeps her mouth shut and shoved him out, even as she feels the flowers begin to bloom.

She does tell him she doesn’t feel the same.

“I know,” Shinsou tells her. “It’s Todoroki. You two smile all the time around each other, you laugh and have fun.” He shrugs sadly. “I just wanted to be honest.

Izumi accepts it, and later she finds the flowers to be yellow tulips.

One-sided love.

Yet first comes the finals, where Izumi screams at Todoroki to use her fire, even as the girl refuses to use it.

“I won’t use his power!” She yells.

“It’s not his! It’s yours!” Izumi cries back.

It’s chaos and destruction and in the end, Izumi has a silver medal.

And she has a smile she treasures.

It’s not love, not yet. But it has a chance to be.

A chance they cultivate, a chance they find becoming stronger and stronger as time goes on. As she and Shinsou enter the hero course, as she fights to protect a boy she barely knows on the streets of Hosu, protecting her hero mentor as well.

It’s a chance she takes, kissing Todoroki after the final exams. Todoroki accidentally burns her in shock and feels horrible.

Izumi treasures the fact a red rose blooms under her skin.

[idreamtofmanderleyagain]

Hot takes about Severus Snape are a wierdly decent glimpse into how a person with progressive values analyses things. Literally every time someone talks about Snape, it’s like this tiny window into how one-dimentionally people actually think.

Recently saw a twitter post that was a fantastic example. Here’s how it goes (paraphrasing):

Person A:“Snape is POC and Queer coded, that’s why you guy’s hate him uwu lol.”

Person B: “Actually I hate him because he was mean and abusive to children under his care uwu but go off I guess lol”

Both of these takes are designed to be dramatic and/or reactionary. They each use partial truths to paint very broad strokes. These are get-em-in-one-hit quips. This is virtue signalling, if you’ll excuse that loaded phrase. Nobody had a substantial conversation, but now everyone who sees their statement knows the high ground they took.

At least a hundred other people chimed in to add their own little quippy hot takes into play, none of which add anything significant, but clearly made everyone feel very highly of themselves.

So many layers of nuance and complex analysis is completely lost in this kind of discussion. On tumblr, you get more of this kind of bullshit, but you don’t have a word count limit, so you guys just spew endless mountains of weak overblown evidence backing up your bullshit arguments, none of which was really about engaging in a real conversation anyway.

Here’s the thing about Snape.

He is a childhood domestic abuse victim. His abuser is a muggle.

He becomes a student at a magical school that takes him away from his abuser and immediately instills in him the idea that being a part of this magical world is a badge of self-worth, empowerment, and provides safety and security - provided that he keeps in line.

There is a war is being waged in that world over his right to exist (he is a half blood).

He is a marginalized person within the context of the narrative, forced to constantly be in the same living space as the children of his own oppressors who are being groomed and recruited into a hate group militia (the pureblood slytherins). They are in turn trying to do the same to him.

He is marginalized person bullied by children who are also part of his oppressor group, but who have “more liberal” leanings and aren’t direct about why he’s being targeted (the mauraders are all purebloods, Sirius, who was the worst offender, was raised in a bigoted household, the same one that produced Bellatrix.).

He had a crush on a girl who is a muggleborn, and therefore she is considered even lesser than him and carries a stigma to those who associate with her. That girl was his only real friend. In his entire life.

For both Snape and Lily, allying themselves to a pureblood clique within their own houses would be a great way of shielding themselves from a measure of the bigotry they were probably facing. There would have been obvious pressure from those cliques to disconnect with one and other.

Every other person who associates with Snape in his adulthood carries some sort of sociopolitical or workplace (or hate cult) baggage with their association. Some of them will physically harm and/or kill him if he steps out of line. He hasn’t at any point had the right environment to heal and adjust from these childhood experiences. Even his relationship with Dumbledore is charged with constant baggage, including the purebloods who almost killed him during their bullying getting a slap on the wrist, the werewolf that almost killed him as a child being placed in an authority position over new children, etc. Dumbledore is canonically manipulative no matter his good qualities, and he has literally been manipulating Snape for years in order to cultivate a necessary asset in the war.

He is a person who is not in the stable mental state necessary to be teaching children, whom has been forced to teach children. While also playing the role of double agent against the hate group militia, the one that will literally torture you for mistakes or backtalk or just for fun. The one that will torture and kill him if he makes one wrong move.

Is the math clicking yet? From all of this, it’s not difficult to see how everything shitty about Snape was cultivated for him by his environment. Snape was not given great options. Snape made amazingly awful choices, and also some amazingly difficult, courageous ones. Snape was ultimately a human who had an extremely bad life, in which his options were incredibly grim and limited.

In fact, pretty much every point people make about how shitty Snape is as a person makes 100% logical sense as something that would emerge from how he was treated. Some if it he’s kind of right about, some of it is the inevitable reality of suffering, and some of it is part of the cycle of abuse and harm.

Even Snape’s emotional obsession with Lily makes logical sense when you have the perspective that he literally has no substantial positive experiences with other human beings that we know of, and he has an extreme, soul destroying guilt complex over her death. Calling him an Incel mysoginist nice guy projects a real-world political ideology and behavior that does not really apply to the context of what happened to him and her.

Even Snape’s specific little acts of cruelty to certain students is a reflection of his own life experiences. He identifies with Neville; more specifically, he identifies his own percieved emotional weaknesses in his childhood in Neville. There’s a very sad reason there why he feels the urge to be so harsh.

Snape very clearly hates himself, in a world where everyone else hates him, too. Imagine that, for a second. Imagine total internal and external hatred, an yearning for just a little bit of true connection. For years. Imagine then also trying to save that world, even if it’s motivated by guilt. Even if nobody ever knows you did it and you expect to die a miserable death alone.

There are more elements here to consider, including the way Rowling described his looks (there may be something in there re: ugliness and swarthy stereotyping). These are just the things that stand out the most prominently to me.

J.K. Rowling is clearly also not reliable as an imparter of moral or sociopolitical philosophies. I don’t feel that her grasp of minority experiences is a solid one, considering how she picks and chooses who is acceptable and who is a threat.

All of that said, this is a logically consistent character arc. Within the context of his narrative, Snape is a marginalized person with severe PTSD and emotional instability issues who has absolutely no room available to him for self-improvement or healing, and never really has. And yes, he’s also mean, and caustic, and verbally abusive to the students. He’s also a completey miserable, lonely person.

There are elements in his character arc that mirror real world experiences quite well. If nothing else, Rowling is enough of an emotional adult to recognise these kinds of things and portray something that feels authentic.

In my opinion, it’s not appropriate to whittle all this down by comparing him directly to the real world experiences of marginalized groups - at least if you are not a part of the group you are comparing him to. There have been many individuals who have compared his arc to their own personal experiences of marginalization, and that is valid. But generally speaking, comparing a white straight dude to people who are not that can often be pretty offensive. This is not a valuable way to discuss either subject.

Also, I believe that while it’s perfectly okay to not like Snape as a character, many of the people who act like Person B are carrying Harry’s childhood POV about Snape in their hearts well into their own adulthood. And if nothing else, Rowling was attempting to say something here about how our perspectives (should) grow and change as we emotionally mature.  She doesn’t have to be a good person herself to have expressed something true about the world in this instance, and since this story is a part of our popular culture, people have a right to feel whatever way they do about this story and it’s characters.

The complexity of this particular snapshot of fictionalized marginalization, and what it reveals about the human experience, cannot be reduced down to “he’s an abuser so he’s not worth anyone’s time/you are bad for liking him.”

And to be honest, I think that it reveals a lot about many of us in progressive spaces, particularly those of us who less marginalized but very loud about our values, that we refuse to engage with these complexities in leu of totally condemning him. Particularly because a lot of the elements I listed above are indeed reflected in real world examples of people who have experienced marginalization and thus had to deal with the resulting emotional damage, an mental illness, and behavior troubles, and bad decisions. Our inability to address the full scope of this may be a good reflection of how we are handling the complexity of real world examples.

Real people are not perfect angels in their victimhood. They are just humans who are victims, and we all have the capacity to be cruel and abusive in a world where we have been given cruelty and abuse. This is just a part of existing. If you cannot sympathise with that, or at least grasp it and aknowledge it and respect the people who are emotionally drawn to a character who refects that, then you may be telling on yourself to be honest.

To be honest, this is especially true if you hate Snape but just really, really love the Mauraduers. You have a right to those feelings, but if you are moralizing this and judging others for liking Snape, you’ve confessed to something about how you’ve mentally constructed your personal values in a way I don’t think you’ve fully grasped yet.

I have a hard time imagining a mindset where a story like Snape’s does not move one to empathy and vicarious grief, if I’m honest. I feel like some people really just cannot be bothered to imagine themselves in other people’s shoes, feeling what they feel and living like they live. I struggle to trust the social politics of people who show these kinds of colors, tbh.

But maybe that’s just me.

[k7l4d4]

Owl House AU Ideas, ZA FIFTH!!

Hello all, once again, I am BACK with an AU! It is a crossover with the popular superhero franchise, DC COMICS BABY!! WOOT! Specifically, this is a crossover between Earth 16, setting for the Young Justice Comics and Show, and The Owl House setting in the form of the newly formed Earth 53! Give ‘em some love folks, round of applause! Sorry if I’m hamming it up too much, just feeling really amped.

The premise is partially inspired by a crossfic over on ao3, can't really recall the name right now, that involves the Anti-Monitor's Anti-Matter wave occurring; The Owl House-Verse gets wiped out and subsequently resurrected as part of the DC Multiverse, with Amity somewhere in the mix due to being taken off the board just before her world is destroyed. In this idea, something occurs that results in the Boiling Isles and its connected Earth to be merged into the DC Multiverse; the shockwaves result in mass alterations to the two world's shared history as the Boiling Isles and Human Realm become the new Earth 53 (I know that the DC-Verse isn't restricted to just 52 worlds anymore, the name is mostly for dramatic effect). The biggest difference between this and similar premises is the idea of Earth 53 coming from OUTSIDE the Source Wall, an extreme anomaly in the DC-Verse Space-Time Continuum, if not an outright impossibility, that has resulted in "Errors" forming across the worlds. Amity is the one of the only ones who clearly remembers life before the merger, and the changes, both to the world and to herself, have been jarring. She who was once the heiress-apparent to a magical household of considerable influence was now the marginalized third child to two of the meanest lawyers in Bonesburough, friendless and adrift. In a world where humans, witches, and demons live alongside one another, and magic is a rare commodity hoarded by major cities and governments, where is her place in it all? And, more importantly, where is Luz?!?

Boscha: Unlike her canon self, DC Boscha is a tough girl who grew up on the streets, fending for herself at nearly every turn; she was eventually taken in by the Park family, one of Bonesborough's most well-known, if not necessarily influential, families, growing close to the daughter of the family, Willow Park. Boscha often acts as Willow's bodyguard and confidant, providing both protection from anyone trying to harass her, and a shoulder to lean on when she needs it. She has a small crush on Willow, but hasn't realized it for what it is yet. Boscha is a conduit for the Strength Force, granting her immense physical strength, durability, and geokinesis. Despite her immense power, Boscha is largely unskilled with her abilities, often being limited to the most basic interpretations of her powers. Willow: This version of Willow grew up as part of the lower Upper-Class, straddling the border between the Middle-Class and High-Society circles, gaining renown for her skill with plants and vegetation in general. While just as kind as her Canon self, DC Willow is somewhat jaded, often having difficulty opening up to others for fear that they are trying to get something from her or manipulate her. Willow suffers from a mild form of Narcolepsy, falling asleep when sufficiently stressed. Willow has a strong connection to the Green, gifting her with a powerful bond with all plant life; unlike other Conduits and Avatars for the Green, Willow refuses to fully connect with it, channeling her nature as animal, and as such of the Red, to retain her self. This unique state of being both apart of yet separate from the Green offers Willow a few abilities that other, similar, existences lack, with her greatest ability being the power to forcibly merge an enemy with the Green, essentially turning the Nature Dimension into a prison for them, though the technique is only fully effective against enemies who wield the Green themselves; non-Green Empowered individuals can only be held for around a month to up to a year before the Green rejects them and spits them out back in the Physical Plane, often sickly and in need of food and water, though not desperately so. An unusual quirk of Willow's is that she often adopts a demeanor similar to a religious figure, using formal speech and an extremely serene and calm demeanor; no one is sure, not even Willow herself, if it is an act or if she is genuinely being altered in some way by using her powers. Gus: Half-human, Half-witch, this interpretation of Gus often feels uncomfortable in his own skin. The only time Gus truly feels at ease is when he is immersed in water. At the age of Eight, Gus when swimming and nearly drowned, only surviving due to a sudden surge of the Life Force resonating through the world. As a result of his exposure to the Life Force, Gus possesses similar abilities to, yet still distinct from, those of Atlanteans. Gus cannot communicate with sea-life, but they are unusually docile in his presence, with even the most vicious of sea life being harmless to him. Gus can distort and manipulate the water in his body, and the water vapor in the nearby air, to create illusions and mirages. Gus tries to disguise his discomfort by hamming up his more excitable and comedic traits. Replacing his obsession with humans, this version of Gus is near obsessed with Magic, instantly going into Fanboy mode at the site of Amity's spells (note: Gus is capable of distinguishing magic from similar phenomena on his own, a holdover from his past self having magic, though his current self is unaware why he can do so). Skara: A popular girl, Skara sits at the front of the pack, yet also has a reputation of being kind and accepting; as she attends one of the most divisive schools in regards to Human-Witch-Demon relations in the world, this often results in her being forced to play mediator, much to her own distress. Skara can't stand seeing anyone upset or feeling left out, going out of her way to include others, even if it means she herself ends up left out. Skara is incredibly skilled at both Music and the Bow, serving as an expy of both Black Canary and Green Arrow, in that she wields a harp/bow combo capable of launching sound arrows. Skara is a nascent magic user, though her skills are highly unrefined and geared near-exclusively towards those based on sound. Edric and Emira: The twins are a study in contrasts as opposed to their canon similarities. While they still possess their sense of mischief, Edric has been groomed to be a respectable gentleman, at least in terms of appearance, while Emira is essentially an out and about rebel, bucking authority and rules at every opportunity. Edric thinks of himself as suave and charming, but to most everyone it just comes across as adorable and childish; a little kid thinking he's an adult. Emira is confrontational, aggressive, and possesses a reputation for being a punk, though she often takes a stand against bullies and thugs. The two often argue, but both fondly remember the days when they were more similar and got along more. The two share Speed Force powers, Negative for Edric, Positive for Emira, yet neither is compatible with their respective bodies, as Emira is more attuned with the Negative and Edrice with the Positive. To counteract the damage their abilities do to their bodies, they channel each others' Speed Force for their sibling; a side-effect of this sharing is that they cannot utilize the super-speed common to all Speed Force Conduits unless they work in perfect sync, but otherwise possess all the standard abilities of their respective forces. Jerbo: The quirky child of the local funeral director, Jerbo is highly skittish, often jumping at random and having a meek personality, he is slow to trust others. Jerbo has always possessed a fascination with the intricacies of life, death, and the cycle between them. This fascination ultimately culminated in him developing a connection to the Green! However, an accident disrupted the process, causing his connection to degrade and allowing a connection to the Grey and the Rot to enter in its place. None of his connections are particularly strong, but using them in concert allows him to leverage powers and abilities far above his technical weight class. He often uses his powers to necromantically command plants and bacteria, building intricate "Rot Golems" to fight with, in a manner similar to his Canon Plant Golems. In addition, Jerbo often uses his Rot powers to accelerate and regulate the decay of already dead plants and animals to create fertilizer and revitalize the environment. Viney: An adventurous free spirit, Viney has a genuinely compassionate soul, going out of her way to help out however she can. Viney has a deep sense of empathy, particularly for animals, serving as a first look for local pets before their owners decide to take them to the vet or not. Viney cannot stand animal abuse in any form, often protesting groups that have shown histories of shady animal practices whenever she can. Viney wields a connection to the Red, which she leverages in a manner similar to the powers of B'wanna Beast, as well as healing. Viney often serves as the team's emergency medic, as she lacks her canon-self's medical training. Barkus: An actual dog as opposed to his Dog-Witch Canon self, Barkus never the less can communicate with others. Barkus wields a connection to the Sage Force, granting him far higher levels of intellect compared to other animals and the ability to speak. Barkus possesses numerous mental abilities, including fortune telling, telepathy, and a mild-level of mind-reading. Barkus has a cool head, often serving as the voice of reason for the others, as well as an extra set of eyes and ears, as his nature means few people expect him to be a spy. Eda Clawthorne: Suffering from a weakened immune system and chronic pain, most people are often surprised by how spry and active Eda is. Eda possesses a genius-level intellect, often providing intelligence and resources for the team as well as a mentorship role. Eda enters the field as the "Knight Owl" (Not to be confused with Nite Owl), operating a highly sophisticated battle suit outfitted with a mix of advanced technology and magic to possess an answer to virtually any scenario. While adopted a cold, highly-serious persona when in the field, Eda's real personality isn't all that different from her Canon self, albeit more responsible and less criminally inclined. Eda often spends her time either monitoring the companies she owns portions of or searching for Lilith, who has been missing for several years in the new timeline generated by the shift into the DC Verse. Eda isn't a straight-lace though, she does have numerous connections and contacts in the underworld, she just isn't a flat-out criminal-hermit anymore. King: Not much different from his Canon self, merely lacking his delusions of grandeur and megalomania, he is often grumpy and sullen, prone to the occasional fit of rage over being treated childishly or being babied. He possesses incredibly potent magic, often being in charge of upgrading and repairing the team's gear that requires it, yet lacks the stamina and technique needed to use it in combat. Lilith Clawthorne: Fully remembering the prior timeline, awakening years before Amity, the shame and guilt over her past mistakes drew to her an Ultraviolet Ring, transforming her into the Ultraviolet Lantern of Sector 2814. Lilith's stalwart will allows her to dominate the ring, often bringing her into fellow members of her Corps who have been subsumed by Umbrax, Lilith has dedicated herself to using her shame over her past as fuel for her desire to aid others and protect them from the self-destructive darkness inside of everyone, often acting both as a fighter against evil, but also as a councilor to those she encounters on her journey who are suffering from their self-destructive impulses. When on duty, Lilith manipulates her uniform to disguise her appearance and voice, preventing others from identifying her true identity. Lilith constantly strives to better the lives of others, both as way to make up her past deeds, but also to ensure none feel the suffering she felt in her selfish foolishness.

This is to explain how Luz fits into the story beyond being a Maguffin to drive the plot. Also, because I don't want to drag it out any further and to cut off as many questions and clarifications on world-building ahead of time as I can... I have decided that, while still connected to the wider DC Multi-Verse, this particular idea is set on Earth-16, the earth of the Young Justice show and comic, and the newly formed Earth-53 of the merged Human and Demon Realms. At the time of the shift into the DC-Verse, Luz had been attempting an experimental spell that combined all of her, Eda, and Lilith's knowledge of Magic in order to see if they could fashion a new portal, or, if that proved impossible at the time, use the data to help further develop a cure for the Clawthorne sisters. Whether the spell worked, or did anything really, is unknown, but the reaction of the world shifting caused Luz to be flung across the Verses and Earths of the 52, before she ended up in the care of none other than Klarion the Witch Boy, specifically his fully villainous incarnation from Young Justice. Needless to say, due to Luz's connection, however faint, to the Titan, as well as her unusual magic, Klarion decided to see what fun he could have with her (not in a sexual way, just to clarify to anyone even accidentally thinking about it). This version of Klarion is a full-on Lord of Chaos, and a particularly malevolent one at that, with a wide variety of mystical relics at his disposal for his games and experiments, and just before finding Luz, he came across the most interesting toy of all, a staff that fuses magic and technology, something rarely attempted and often backfired, but he had found one that worked! Luz was not in good shape when Klarion found her, her body and mind damaged by the journey, her very soul mangled. Deciding to pretend to be a nice guy, Klarion used his resources to heal her, but what fun would it be to just up and fix the girl, hmm? Taking inspiration from the staff he had so recently found, Klarion set out to find relics and devices of magic and science both to repair Luz, just to see what mixing them all together would do, and it wasn't like he cared if she died if something went wrong! Low and behold, he managed to find a fragment of the Black Lantern-Corrupted Firestorm Matrix that composed Deathstorm, and a tiny piece of the divine lightning that granted Black Adam, and it WAS the lightning of Adam as opposed to Captain Marvel, and using these pieces, along with some chaos assisted spells for flavor, he worked his magic, pardon the pun. Now, before anyone says anything about these powers making Luz OP... they really won't. She only has a fragment of the Firestorm Matrix, a corrupted one at that, so she has none of the proper abilities of a Firestorm, nor does she possess the abilities of Black Adam, as awesome as that would be. Rather, the mixing of these forces, along with her magic, resulted in the formation of Catalyst, a psionic spirit born of her own mind. Catalyst is largely elemental in nature, lacking the mentality of a human, or any mortal being for that matter, content to sit in the back of Luz's mind, only emerging when something truly dire acts against Luz, as well as passively blocking any and all mental attacks against her. The part about only emerging against dire acts is rather literal, Catalyst will only intervene if Luz is close to death or about to suffer a fatal blow, and she lacks any ability to distinguish friend from foe, preferring to wipe out anything and everything in range to ensure Luz and her's safety. A benefit to the changes induced by Klarion's manipulations is that some of Luz's innate biological potential has been unlocked, but only a little. Luz absorbs information insanely fast, capable of memorizing a 1000 page document in its entirety on a single read through, and her muscle memory develops abnormally fast, making combat training very effective for her, though training is far from mastery, as she doesn't automatically gain the experience needed to make full use of any skills she may acquire. Luz is now naturally drawn to imitation, subconsciously copying Batman and Robin's walking style to minimize noise on instinct alone. Luz does gain some benefit to the Matrix merged with her body, along with the lightning, as her body now naturally acts as a conduit for divine and mystical forces; spells and divinity naturally flow in and out of her without effect, though the magic of Chaos and Order can easily disable her, particularly that of Klarion and Doctor Fate. For offense, Luz can cannibalize her internal energy stores to manipulate as light, electricity, and flames, though not all at once, and she currently doesn't remember how to eat, as the Matrix breaks down anything she can recognize as food and converts it directly into the nutrients, vitamins, and biological materials she needs to live, though she still needs to drink like normal. Luz possesses genuinely inhuman reflexes and mental processing, as she can easily track and process Kid Flash's movements, though anything faster than him gives her a massive migraine to watch. Luz has a limited ability to adjust her body, capable of making herself very fast at the expense of being more fragile, or very strong and durable yet incredibly heavy and slow. Luz suffers severe amnesia, though her personality is basically identical to how she was previously, merely missing the experience and social knowledge to reign in her most dangerous impulses, which she couldn't do very well to begin with, let's be honest, and cannot recall anything other than the fact that she is fluent in both English and Spanish, loves a series of books called the Good Witch Azura, and the names of her friends, though not how she knows them or that they are her friends (I think it is telling that she remembers the people she cares about more than she remembers herself). After Klarion healed her, he promptly dumped her back on earth to fend for herself; after regaining consciousness, Luz basically ambled around acting on whatever impulse struck her, no matter how insane, random, or dangerous, with her antics, combined with her inability to stop herself from using her powers, catching the eye of Cadmus, who promptly took her captive and stuck her in the sub-levels with Superboy. Something of importance to note, the Matrix that is currently helping hold her body together is tainted by the power of Necrom and his perversion of death; as it stands, every time Luz uses her powers and abilities in anyway other than to "eat" she shortens her lifespan, with the rate gradually, almost minutely, but inevitably speeding up. If the problem, and by extension a solution, isn't discovered soon, Luz will die, and her corpse will become an out-of-control vessel of extinction. In part due to the alterations made to her being, Luz views Superboy in a manner similar to a brother, and often tries to run interference between him and Superman to ease the tension and help them get along. Luz's attire upon awaking is composed of a skin-tight, black, sleeveless bodysuit with three silver lines running across it in a manner similarly to an atom model, centering on an orb affixed just above her right breast, emblazoned with a silvery-blue version of her light glyph, not that she currently recognizes it. Luz can disengage her Matrix, which disappears in a crackle of mystic lightning, and return to her civilian state by concentrating hard enough, doing it by accident after being released from Cadmus along with Superboy by the Team and the Justice League; the bad part was that she didn't have any clothes on after dismissing the Matrix, as Klarion didn't particularly care if she was clothed or not after he was done repairing her. Her codename, until she can recall her real name, is Thunderstorm!

Luz originally doesn’t quite remember how to use magic, but after waking up groggy and needing a light one morning, she, by pure accident, draws and casts one of her light glyphs off of pure muscle memory. Her reaction?

Luz: I can do magic? (Looks at the spell floating above her head) I CAN DO MAGIC!! (Cheers)

To explain, due to lacking the presence and power of the Titan, Luz’s spells are now cannibalizing her lifeforce for fuel, which vastly accelerates her life-drain. Of course, this is Luz, if she can use something to help her friends, even if it endangers her, she will, much to the concern of her friends and teammates. As Luz’s lifespan shrinks, she gradually experiences increasing symptoms of hunger, followed by occasional aches and pains that grow in frequency and intensity, before evolving to full-on fits of debilitating agony at its most advanced stages. Luz isn’t concerned about her condition, once she finds out about it that is. Why? Because she has faith that a solution can be found before she is ever in any real danger, and if not? She would gladly giver her life for her friends and the safety of the people... that’s just the kind of gal she is.

As always, feel free to ask questions, comment, or use the idea as you wish.

[wheelygoodteddys]

I don't want to do this!:

I absolutely hate writing about religious discrimination!

Frankly, I wish that I wasn't putting fingers to keyboard about any discrimination.

I also desperately don't want the focus to be on discrimination against everything Islamic and Muslim.

However, sadly, it's the most venomous hated that I have ever encountered, second only to racism against the black human beings of our world.

All my life I must have lived under a rock, maybe I live under a rock now, yet the vileness and outright lies that come out of those obsessed with hating all Islam and Muslims, plus anyone who stands up and says this is wrong, is obscene.

I am disgusted in the way these people respond.

I have had differing opinions with both Muslim men are women yet been addressed with respect and politeness. They are peaceful and not intimidating in any way.

Speak to a person who is anti Muslim, they refuse to listen to anything that may contradict what they want to believe, they will call you a liar and slander you. They intimidate and bully, call you names, question your mental stability, stalk your FB and target your children. The insults and illogical reasoning is unbelievable.

I am horrified that there are people like this in the world!

More horrifying still is for once I can see the appeal in hating the West.

Imagine a young Muslim man, born here, and rather then allowing him to explain what his religion means to him, to try and teach people, that hate everything about him, that he deserves to be not discriminated against, he gets told what his religion is, he is called a murder, a terrorist, a paedophile, a Mysoginist, etc. His sister is spoken to about her husband beating her, being oppressed, asked if she still has her clitorus, threatened with physical abuse, has her hijab torn off, threatened with rape, told she is a bad mother because she sells her baby girls to be raped by old men.

And no matter what they say to try and explain their actual beliefs the abuse flows. And this is from their own countrymen.

Mate, I would want them all gone too! Be honest, who wouldn't!?

Yet if they report abuse or complain about their treatment they are accused of wanting to change things. "They come here and try to change everything", is the cry from the haters!

1) There is NO law that insists that ALL women wear a Burqa in Saudi Arabia: Hijab is only compulsory for Muslim women. Anything else is a choice for those in a practicing Muslim family.

2) Women are not allowed to get an education in Saudi Arabia: I urge you to look up any TV broadcast from local Saudi Arabia telecasts. Women, in hijab, reading the news. This suggests an education. However, both men and women are encouraged to gain knowledge in Islam.

3) WTF does Saudi Arabia have to do with every other Muslim world wide, especially in Australia?

4) FGM (female genital mutilation) is an Islamic practice: Far from it! The Islamic religion urges that both men and women enjoy sex and that a man sexually pleases his wife. FGM is a tribal practice. However, MGM (male genital mutilation) has and still is widely practiced in Australia.

5) There is NO "no go" zones in Australia!: This urban myth was started by a female, Canadian Islamphobe. It was said to be proved when the police removed her from Lakemba for disturbing the peace. The police weren't working for the Muslims to enforce their "no go" zones! How ridiculous. Others tell totally unbelievable stories about women walking there and being spat on for not wearing hijab. Firstly, not all Muslimah wear hijab, even in Lakemba. Also there are numerous non-Muslims that go to these fabled areas to eat, visit, shop, do business, etc. This rumor is absolutely ludicrous!

6) Muslim women are oppressed, even here in Australia!: It is naive that there is no abusive people in any religion or walk of life, however, Muslimah are not oppressed as perf the usual course. Quiet the opposite! Historically, and as it is today, Muslimah have the freedom to do and be whatever they want, just like Muslim men. There is no distinction between what male and females can do. In fact, men are encouraged to wash their own clothes, cook and do housework. Also the Qur'an makes it very clear that the mother is the head of the household.

7) It is always claimed that Muslims want to change things: Yet, the question, "what have they actually changed?", goes unanswered. Muslims are required to live by the laws of the land, and as such, really don't want to change anything but the way they are treated. Especially how the women are treated. Our hero Islamphobes always target women and children because Muslimah are more recognizable.

8) Why are these people so threatened by the hijab or niqab?: For fuck sake it's a piece of material! It's not what's on a woman's head that oppresses her. However, who are those that want to oppress Muslimah? Muslim men or the Islamphobe? I say without hesitation, the Islamphobe! They don't ask a Muslim women how she feels, they don't ask what she may want to wear. They rarely comprehend the meaning of the hijab to a woman but rather try to twist it into some sexually perverse. They proclaim that Muslim women shouldn't wear a head covering. As Australia is a free country, with a freedom of religion and freedom of lawful individually, the real oppression and discrimination, is telling Muslim women what to wear.

9) Telling Muslim women what they are: The idea that, to Islamphobes, Muslim women are stupid and therefore, don't know that they are oppressed, would have to be the most Mysoginist slap in the face ever! All I can say is, "at least Muslim men know a woman's worth is awesome".

10) Muslim men marry girl babies of 5 to 6 years old and Muslim mothers allow it: Firstly, American is the place booming in child brides at the moment. With some states having no minimum age for marriage and also no divorce for women. Compared to Malaysian Clerics, years ago, raising the age of concent to 18. Also contrary to European/western/Christian culture, women have been granted divorce since the 700s in Islam.

11) Women wear the Burqa in Australia: This is actually one of those urban myths, started by Pauline Hanson. To see a Burqa in Australia would be very unusual. Most Australian Muslimah are from cultures that don't don the Burqa. The Burqa is an Afghan tradition and is very rare in Australia. Then why fight "ban the Burqa"? In one word, principle! It is against a woman's basic rights to tell her how much she can or can't wear, within the laws of public decency. There is also a security argument, as a Burqa is rarely worn that argument is rather moot.

12) Muslim men have lots of wives and children and just live on welfare: This is so silly that it's laughable. Once again, it is rare for Muslim men to have more than one wife these days as it is financially impractical. Also most Muslim men prefer one wife. In Australia, on average, the Muslim family consists of 2 children. With all this being said, usually Muslim men and women are educated and professional people. If not they strive to own businesses. The stupid welfare claims are unfounded and actually go against most Muslim traditions and cultures that have a hard work ethic.

13) They come here are get more welfare than Australians with no waiting period: This information can be researched on government websites. There is a waiting time for new Australians, Muslim or otherwise, which often means charitable families that sponsor them and take them in during this time. When they do receive any benefit, before getting on their feet, it is no more or less than anyone else.

14) They receive a thousand dollar iPhone and designer clothes as soon as they arrive: Is this one even worth answering? I just shake my head in disbelief!

15) Muslims have been Australians for generations: It amazes me how many people actually believe that no Muslim is Australian born. The history of the Islamic people in Australia predates white colonization. Islamic men from Indonesia travelled down and through Australia. There was intermarriage with the Indigenous peoples and even revertion to Islam by some. A more constant move to Australia, by those of the Islamic faith, started in the 1800's.

16) All Muslims are the same because they read from the same book: this is like saying that all Christian denominations are the same because they read from the same book. Most know that this is not the case.

There are many different varieties of Muslim. Yes they have the Qur'an yet addition books vary between the sects.

There are 72 different sects, numerous sects within the main sects, different traditions, different cultures, different regions, different regions, different countries and different families.

As for the Qur'an: there is the subject context, further context, overall context, historical context and spiritual context. Then all the different ways it is interpreted. Also interpretation can be manipulated and cherry picked to suit an agenda or bias. This can be said of the Bible also.

Where interpretation is important is in the understanding of Arabic. To translate a language as complex as Arabic into simple English leaves the meaning truly lacking.

For example: Islam is a very sexually moral religion. Men and women are not meant to sexulise each other, There is no unsupervised dating and dressing is modest. However, it is commonly thought the men will receive a bus load of virgins to have an orgy with in paradise. However, "virgin" more correctly translates to "pure". This is a "spiritual" context and "heavenly beings/angels is probably a better translation into English.

17) Muslims want to kill all Jews and Muslims. The Qur'an tells them to kill all Christians: Unfortunately people are so off the mark on this one. Islam actually says that Muslims cannot destroy a place of worship nor hurt religious "ministers". The Qur'an refers to Christians and Jews as the "people of the book". In fact, the only other women a Muslim man is permitted to marry is either a Christian or a Jew. The wives of these two religions are also not expect to revert as they are seen as sisters to Islam. Christian and Jewish men and women are thought of as brothers and sisters to Muslims.

There is a long list of urban myth, propaganda, rumors and out right lies that are used as ammunition against Islam and Muslims.

The arrogance of the Islamphobe is to tell a Muslim what their faith is! With no other religion would a person, outside that faith, verse another in their religion.

[tailahjanbash]

The Christian, Mental Illness, and The Cure

Mental health has been a topic that has been circulating around culture and around the church a lot in 2019.

As a girl, I struggled with an eating disorder. I had anorexia for about a year. I weighed around 95 pounds, and hardly ate anything. I remember feeling ugly, worthless, and trapped inside a body I hated. The thing was, I had been a Christian my entire life. I knew Jesus loved me, I loved him back, and I knew that he healed people… but I never personally invited him into my mess. As a result, I suffered from mental illness.

I vividly remember being in a worship service, lifting my hands and surrendering every area of my life and pain to Jesus. In that moment, I physically felt weights being lifted off of me, and I knew my eating disorder was gone. I didn’t know it at the time, but The Lord had cast an oppressive spirit out of me.

As Christians, it’s absolutely possible to go to church every week, know all the stories, believe and still. be. oppressed.

So why are there so many Christians tormented by mental illness, if Jesus already conquered every sin, death, and disease?

Some people might argue that it is because we live in a fallen world. There will always be pain and sometimes we just have to suffer. But this completely undermines scripture and the sacrifice Jesus made on the cross. When we come into agreement with our mental illness or pain, we are saying “Jesus, you died for me so I could get into heaven, but your sacrifice wasn’t powerful enough to take away the pain of this world.”

Yes, we live in a fallen world. Yes, life is going to be hard. Will we face difficulties? Absolutely. But we are promised that we will overcome, because the true word of God says:

The Lord will cause your enemies who rise against you to be defeated before you. They shall come out against you one way and flee before you seven ways. Deuteronomy 28:7

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly. John 10:10

But the question still remains:

Why are there so many Christians tormented by mental illness, if Jesus already conquered sickness and death?

There are three common reasons that I have found:

1. We are not empowered by the Holy Spirit – We talk so much about God the Father and King Jesus, but the third part of the God Head is often overlooked in the contemporary church. The Holy Spirit. He is a person and he is a gift. The Holy Spirit empowers us, strengthens us, and delivers us from sin. We are instructed to undergo two baptisms—water baptism, then baptism of The Holy Spirit (Luke 3:16). That means simply praying and inviting the Holy Spirit to come and fill you.  It is impossible to live the Christian life fully when we are apart from the power and the presence of the Holy Spirit.

You will know when you have been baptized in the Holy Spirit because you will be filled with new power. You will be able to operate in the spiritual gifts that the bible describes in 2 Corinthians 14, you will have the power to be able to live in freedom, and to command the Enemy to leave. You will begin to develop the fruits of the spirit (Galatians 5:22-23) and hear God’s voice.

If your relationship with God feels dry, powerless, or stagnant, that is a good indicator that you are in need of the Holy Spirit. It is also important to note that being baptized and filled with the Holy Spirit is NOT a one-time thing like water baptism can be. There is the initial asking/baptism experience with Him, but we have to continuously be filled with the Holy Spirit. This means asking the Him to fill you daily.

2. We are uneducated about deliverance. Deliverance ministry is a ministry of the church that concentrates on spiritual freedom. When we study scripture, we learn that there are demons, they constantly work to oppress humanity, and that we must be on our guard, ready to fight and conquer the schemes of Satan. (Ephesians 6:12, 1 Cor 16:13-14).

Deliverance ministry often happens when the afflicted person takes a step back from their situation and realizes that they cannot keep living this way. The oppressed Christian realizes they need rescuing from compulsive sins or behaviors they cannot stop committing or have little control over, such as alcoholism or a drug addiction.

In my case in 2017, I was horribly tormented by anxiety. I reached a point where I could not take it anymore. I had panic attacks every single day and tried taking supplements and different forms of “self-care” remedies. They did not work.

I finally went to my spiritual mentor and told her that I had been ridden with deep anxiety for months.We prayed together and a demonic spirit of anxiety left my body. Since that day, I have not had panic attacks and am no longer bound to anxiety. I have total and complete healing from that mental illness.

Many times, especially when someone initially goes through deliverance, it looks like what I did–partnering with a spiritual leader or mentor who is filled and empowered by the Holy Spirit and breaking off demonic strongholds by the power of prayer. Deliverance is a serious step towards freedom, and those seeking it should be fully accepting of the lordship of Jesus in their life and ready to turn away from their sin.

3. We do not take authority over the enemy. A lot of Christians pray, plead, and hope that God will someday take their illness away instead of standing ground and taking authority over the spirits attacking their mind. This of course, comes after deliverance once that bondage has been broken and you have freed yourself from the oppressive spirits.

Imagine your teacher gives you an assignment to complete. She has given you all of the instructions on how to complete the project, but you refuse to read the directions and instead have a melt down and send her countless emails begging her to complete the assignment for you. Is your teacher going to do that? Doubtful.

Why do we do that with God? We refuse to read our bibles—the instructions for how to live a free and whole life—then beg him to take away our torment. Will he do it? If you wish and hope and pray, I mean He’s God… He can. But if you continue to sit back and let the enemy bully you, you will never grow in your faith. When we refuse to learn spiritual warfare, we live a life of spiritual immaturity and compromise—you will survive but never be able to thrive. You will be powerless over every wave the enemy throws at you and be swallowed up in torment.

The good news is, that is not what God has intended for your story.

The bible tells us to take every thought captive (2 Cor 10:15). We are to call out those invasive, compulsive, and negative thoughts and cast them back into the pit of hell where they belong.

Christians must understand that their identity is royal because they are a child of God and are not subject to any kind of torment from the kingdom of darkness.

You have all authority and power over the enemy because the king of kings lives inside of you.  When we don’t know our identity in Christ and who He says we are, we allow darkness to push us around.

    Part 2: Examples from the Bible

Pastor and theologian Neil T. Anderson writes, “Christians who think demons were active when Christ was on earth, but their activity has subsided are not embracing the whole counsel of God in light of what His word says, nor are they facing reality.”

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:10-12

Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 1 Peter 5:8

If demonic forces are not actively trying to oppress believers, why would Paul instruct us to wear the armor of God and continuously fight against our enemies?

Now that we have established that there are spirits, the bible continues to go into even more details about the kinds of spirits that attempt to torment us.

For God has not given us a spirit of fear but of power and love and self-control. 2 Timothy 1:7

We see from this verse that fear/anxiety is not simply a chemical imbalance, but a spirit. Does your body have a physical reaction to the Spiritual climate? Absolutely. That is why psychologists can only tell you what is happening in your body once that anxiety enters. It cannot explain how or why anxiety got there. A Harvard Medical article stated, “Nerve cell connections, nerve cell growth, and the functioning of nerve circuits have a major impact on depression. Still, their understanding of the neurological underpinnings of mood is incomplete.”

Neurological scans and doctors can only tell you the physiological affects that mental illness, in this case depression, can cause you. Their best guess is either the mental illness was passed down genetically, or that it is the aftermath of trauma.

Can I tell you something, friends? We are not just bodies. You are a complex being, made up of a spirit that God breathed into, a soul that contains your will and emotions, and a physical body. All of these work together and affect one another. They are not separated but work together and make up YOU!

Scripture tell us that generational curses are the cause of illnesses passed down throughout our families, and that they are not only physical but spiritual (Exodus 34:7) . They can be broken by the power of Christ through deliverance, and we can receive total and complete healing. This doesn’t sound like science and faith bumping heads, but actually explaining one another!

When you really think about it, it makes so much sense. They work together because He is the author and creator of our body, spirit, soul and science.

If we write off what the bible says about mental illness because it wasn’t around when modern medicine was, then we are undermining Gods word and authority. We are picking and choosing aspects of the bible to believe and parts to throw away. When we do this, we are saying that the bible is not truth, but just good teaching that we can pick and choose where to apply and where to ignore. In other words, it is being your own god.

The Bible does not shy away from talking about mental illness, so the church shouldn’t either.

Scripture actually tell us not to be afraid 365 times! One for every day of the year. Jesus even tells us not to be anxious about our lives! (Matthew 6:25-34)

If we are instructed not to be anxious, but instead to cast out fear, then this means that we have dominion over it!

The bible even goes beyond depression and anxiety—it discusses insanity, confusion, madness, epilepsy, self-harm, and suicide. These are only a few references that I could find quickly.  The scriptures do not tell us that these people only had medical issues, but spiritual ones, and that these mental illnesses came from unclean spirits, or demons. Ref: Isa 61:3, 2 Tim 1:7, 1 Sam 16:14, Matt 4:24, Mark 5:5

Throughout the gospels of Jesus, multitudes of mentally and physically ill people were brought to Jesus and he rebuked demons out of them. We see this in the cases of epilepsy, Tourette’s, self-harm, even crippled people were physically healed by Jesus simply rebuking a spirit out of them. From this we learn that demons can cause mental and physical illness. Do they cause every single form? No, some people that were brought to Jesus were just sick. But the same resolution was found every time a sick person, mental or physical, was brought to Jesus: he healed them.

And that same healing is available to you through Jesus.

The Young Boy With Epilepsy (Matthew 17:14-20)

And when they came to the crowd, a man came up to him and, kneeling before him, said, “Lord, have mercy on my son, for he is an epileptic and he suffers terribly. For often he falls into the fire, and often into the water. And I brought him to your disciples, and they could not heal him.” And Jesus answered, “O faithless and twisted generation, how long am I to be with you? How long am I to bear with you? Bring him here to me.” And Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of him, and the boy was healed instantly.

Then the disciples came to Jesus in private and asked, “Why couldn’t we drive it out?” He replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”

There is SO much to unpack here, we don’t have time to get into all of it. But BELIEVING for the healing is what caused this young man to be healed of his mental illness. The disciples all followed and loved Jesus, but they did not have any faith that he could cure the young man from epilepsy! Jesus then rebukes his followers and calls their generation perverse because they didn’t believe he could cure the disease.

So often, we are the disciples in this story. There was a season of my life where I was overwhelmed with severe depression. During those days, the darkness felt more real than the presence of God. It wasn’t until I cast out that spirit of heaviness that l could see that I was believing the lies it fed me: My sorrow was too great for God to take away. That I was unlovable and meant to be alone. That God hated me, and my depression was punishment for being a bad daughter.

What lies have you adopted?

We must see through the lies of the enemy, even when our emotions and mental state seem so out of control and wounded. People are in bondage to the lies they believe, which is why we must reject every statement about ourselves that does not align with scripture. We do this by reading the word and learning about who he says we are.

This is why Jesus says, “You will know the truth and the truth will set you free.” John 8:32

I do want to bring up medication briefly, because I know there will be questions and people will probably make inaccurate assumptions.

I am not telling anyone to go to their kitchen and dump out their medicine or neglect what their physicians have told them. Doctors, medicine, and therapists can be wonderful help, but they are not the hope.

In the words of pastor Henry Seeley, “I’m not here to give you medical advice. But I believe that God has more for you than just spending the rest of your life dependent on medication. Medication might take a season, and that’s okay, that could be part of the journey for some of you. But if I went to the doctor, and the doctor told me there was something wrong and I need to take Tylenol every day for the rest of my life, I would question what that kind of advice that is. Because that is acknowledging that something is wrong, but rather than fixing what is wrong, we are just going to cover it up so you can cope for the rest of your life.”

Part 3: Walking In Freedom

What does it look like to practically walk out everything we just discussed?

We must be filled with the Holy Spirit daily

We should seek deliverance and spiritual freedom if we notice there are areas in our lives that are not submitted to and ruled by The Lord Jesus.

We must put on the armor of God daily (Ephesians 6)

We should spend time daily reading the bible, worshipping, and praying in the presence of God.

We must stand firm, speak scripture over ourselves, and pray against the enemy when the attacks come.

All of these steps can be accomplished by having a healthy and vibrant prayer life. The more time you spend talking with God the more truths he will reveal to you about the journey you are on.

One of the pastors at our church said something profound the other day. He said, “The dark places where the church doesn’t go and spread the gospel, will come to infiltrate the church.”

I heard the Holy Spirit say, “That is what has happened to my church with mental illness.”

My heart broke when I heard that. And I began to work on this blog post.

As the church, we must be vigilant followers of Jesus who do not conform to the thinking patterns of our culture and society. We must take the narrative back and view contemporary issues through the lens of the one we are following, who IS truth.

Our world is so starved of the truth right now—we are constantly lied to in news, media, politics, and religion. We cannot follow the world and choose to be our own source of truth. We have seen where this has gotten our world. Mental illnesses, addictions, racism, divorce rates, murders, suicides, and terror attacks have continued to rise. People are lost and in despair because they do not know healing is available to them. What is the church going to do about it?

Are we too busy bickering about if mental health is a spiritual issue? The differences between doctrines? We have the answer, we have the healing, we have wholeness because we have Jesus.

His sacrifice was so powerful, it erased sin, death, sickness, and disease. When Jesus rose from the dead, it was so you didn’t have to cope and live with mental illness. He overcame it so you could have life to the full!

If you are still waiting for the healing, then it is for a reason and that reason will be revealed in His perfect timing. But hear me when I say, the healing will come as long as we seek Him and seek spiritual freedom.

It’s okay to not be okay, but it’s not okay to stay there. We have a hope greater than and outside of medicine, doctors, or a diagnosis. We have Jesus.

[thecomicsnexus]

FRANK MILLER’S RONIN JULY 1983 - AUGUST 1984 BY FRANK MILLER AND LYNN VARLEY

SYNOPSIS (FROM WIKIPEDIA)

In feudal Japan, a young, nameless samurai has sworn to protect his master, Lord Ozaki, from assassins. Ozaki is assassinated at night by a demon called Agat in the guise of a geisha, in an act of revenge for Ozaki stealing his sword. The sword is powered by blood — if it can be fueled by the blood of an innocent, the sword will become powerful enough to destroy Agat. Ozaki has hidden the sword, so Agat cannot find it. The young samurai prepares to perform seppuku at his master's graveside. The spirit of Ozaki appears before him and demands that he find the sword and keep it from Agat until his skills are great enough to destroy the demon lord. The young samurai becomes a rōnin, wandering the countryside for many years. He comes to Agat's castle, and fights his way inside. Since the sword has never killed an innocent, it is not powerful enough to destroy Agat, so when Agat approaches him from behind, the ronin thrusts the sword through his own abdomen, impaling Agat. As Agat dies, he curses the ronin, and both their souls are trapped inside the sword until someone releases them.

Eight centuries later, social and economic collapse has left New York a lawless wasteland, populated by squatters, factions, and mutants. In the heart of the city is the Aquarius Complex, the headquarters of the Aquarius Corporation. The Aquarius Corporation is an idealistic company founded by three people: Peter McKenna, inventor of biocircuitry, his wife, Casey McKenna, Aquarius' head of security, and Mr. Taggart, who funded and controls Aquarius. The company is successful developing and marketing biocircuitry as a means of saving a world on the brink of war. Biocircuitry is a new model of plastics-based electronics, capable of self-organization and self-repair under the direction of Virgo, the artificial intelligence at the heart of the Aquarius Complex.

Aquarius's ward, Billy Challas, was born without any limbs due to a genetic defect and has telekinetic powers. Virgo works with him to develop his psionic abilities and Billy tests cutting-edge prosthetic limbs for Aquarius. Billy has been having vivid dreams of the story of Ozaki, the ronin, and Agat. Billy and Virgo are confused by the detail and historical accuracy of the dream since his education had never covered feudal Japan.

Back at Aquarius, Virgo explains what has occurred to Casey McKenna, who assumes Virgo's logic units have been affected, but begins an investigation anyway. Agat infiltrates the complex, where he murders Taggart and assumes his form. In this guise, Agat begins negotiating a weapons deal with the Japan-based Sawa Corporation. Peter McKenna is outraged; he had created the technology under the agreement that it would be for non-violent purposes only. He confronts Taggart and realizes that he's an impostor. He informs Virgo, who is not only unshaken by this revelation, but immediately informs Taggart, forming a pact with him. Peter infiltrates Virgo's memory bank and forces her to show him what happened to Taggart. Even with the video replay, Peter refuses to believe the story and accuses Virgo of killing Taggart. He is kidnapped and held prisoner by Agat.

Head, an aging hippie who realizes that the ronin is his ticket to security, tells the ronin that he'll 'manage' him and take care of him; the ronin passively acquiesces. Head plans to sell the ronin as "The Elvis of Violence", and makes deals with the heads of both the Nazi and Black factions to kill the other faction's leader in exchange for rice, beer, sterno, and a place to sleep.

Casey McKenna gets authorization to pursue and retrieve the ronin, understanding from Virgo that Billy Challas has somehow been transformed into a killer, and that the absence of effective law enforcement means that capturing him is Aquarius' responsibility. The three man team who finds the ronin, however, is killed without hesitation. Convinced of Virgo's story, Casey seeks permission to kill the ronin. Taggart denies this when Virgo informs him that the ronin is, in fact, Billy, complete with telekinetic power and, as such, might be useful in cybernetics. Casey finds the ronin dealing with the Nazi and Black factions and, despite her orders, attempts to kill him. Casey is knocked unconscious by the two factions before she can accomplish this and is thrown into a pit. The ronin kills both faction leaders, discards Head, and goes to rescue Casey.

The pit leads into sewers infested with cannibals, who swarm and kidnap Casey and the ronin. The ronin breaks free and slaughters the cannibals. Casey is surprised to find herself falling in love with the ronin. It snows shortly thereafter, for the first time in five years, and the ronin speaks English out of the blue. Casey and the ronin sleep together in the snow.

Peter, bound and gagged, is met by therapist Sandy. Peter convinces Sandy to free him and they try to make sense of all that has occurred. Peter concludes that Virgo kept the extent of Billy's powers a secret in order to exploit them, and that Billy created the ronin based around the television programs he loved so much as a kid, using his powers to create arms and legs built for himself and control Casey. Sandy, hearing this, thinks Peter is insane, and leaves him alone with Virgo.

Robots sent by Taggart attack the ronin and Casey, removing the ronin's mechanical arms and legs. Virgo, controlling the robots, starts a mental attack on the ronin, bringing forward Billy's repressed memory of murdering a local bully. Billy, enraged, regains his limbs, but a horde of flying robots subdue him and blast the subway tunnel where Casey had been trying to make her escape. Trapped, the ronin mentally reaches out to Casey, who regains consciousness within the rubble and kills a robot. Casey breaks into Aquarius, which by this point has engulfed the entire city. The ronin causes a blackout that allows Casey to escape the guards and find Peter. Virgo forces Agat to restrain himself, and address the workers about the blackout. Virgo confronts Billy mentally. Virgo soothes Billy and convinces him to stop helping Casey.

Casey, with the help of Learnid and Sandy, whom Learnid convinces of Peter's sanity, finds Peter. A physical wreck, Peter informs Casey that Billy is being manipulated by Virgo into turning fantasy into reality. A Virgo robot attacks and kills Peter. Reinvigorated by Casey's sadness, Billy begins questioning Virgo. When Casey is attacked by another robot, Billy is enraged and lashes out, destroying it. Virgo verbally castigates Billy, threatening to send him away (as his mother did after she saw him murder the bully) if he doesn't stop. Billy backs down.

Taggart, trying to calm the workers, is confronted by Learnid who accuses him of having been corrupted. Before Taggart can attack, Virgo orders him away, stating a life-threatening hazard has occurred. Learnid notes that regulations give him authority in such situations to evacuate non-essential personnel and forces Virgo to carry out the order.

Casey runs into Peter, now a deformed half-man/half-machine, who attacks her. Peter explains that Billy's powers gave Virgo a consciousness and Virgo wanted more. In order to increase his power, while keeping him under control, she manipulated him into creating the ronin, thereby releasing his power, but trapping him in fantasy. Virgo wants to make biocircuitry the new dominant life form on Earth. Casey kills Peter and tells Virgo to take her to the ronin. Once near him, she is transported back into fantasy, and keeps playing along. Kissing the ronin, they are confronted by Agat. Casey turns to confront him but rather than taking out her sword, she shoots him in the head. Agat's wiring explodes, revealing him to be a robot.

Sensing danger, Virgo tries in vain to talk Casey out of acting, to no avail. Casey frees the ronin, then humiliates him, as a woman had avenged his master where he had failed. Casey then gives him a sword to commit seppuku while acting as his second. As the ronin guts himself, Billy cries in agony. Virgo tries to scold him to take control but Billy can't control himself, blaming Virgo for making him feel worthless. The ronin shoves the sword into his heart, Casey decapitates him, and Billy unleashes a telekinetic blast which destroys Aquarius, and by extension, New York. The only ones left standing are Casey and the ronin.

CONTEXT

REVIEW

There are too many things to have in mind with this novel, I do not recommend analyzing individual chapters, while this was published as a mini-series, it is pretty clear that it has to be read like a book.

This is important, because for the first three episodes, it felt pretty much like the average Frank Miller “toxic masculinity” western adventure. But then, everything changes completely and you no longer know what is real or not. Even the ending is a bit ambiguous. Did Billy survive only to live in a fantasy world?

There are also many references to social problems of 1983, like the world going to hell, world war III and humans feeling replaced by machines. Half of this story feels like many other Frank Miller’s stories where big corporations are free to bend the laws and nature for a profit. (RoboCop comes to mind).

But then, the second part of this story blows up into a very different story that doesn’t even match the premise of the novel. It’s like the last three chapters are not the ending of the first three. And the fact that it’s all a fantasy, makes up for what could be considered artistic errors (like a Japanese having blue eyes).

Frank Miller’s art is polarizing. His faces are not always human, and much like John Romita Jr. his characters tend to look to much alike. But this fluctuates a lot and sometimes we get perfectly human faces. So my guess is that this is intentional. I read somewhere that Miller was conscious about the similarities in his art with Moebius. This is notorious, in fact, I would say that the whole novel has an European feel to it. But it also draws from manga, and his influences are balanced enough not to look like he is copying others.

Lynn Varley takes advantage of the print technology used for this book (not Newsprint), and while not making the comic full of colors (the one thing the change in technology allows), but full of shades. So while her palette is still limited, there are many tones of each color. She also decided for a bi dimensional feel that matches Miller’s art. Other graphic novel at the time had gradients, I don’t those would have look good with the art.

As with many westerns, female roles are complicated. They are either a sexual distraction or macho women. This case in particular shows inverted roles in Casey’s home life, with her husband being a bit more effeminate (and possibly bisexual). At the same time, she falls prey for a macho fantasy, and while she puts an end to the bigger menace, one would have to think that she is still prisoner of Billy’s imagination. So I don’t know, you tell me...

I give this novel a score of 10

[hereticalheraldry]

Disney Princesses’ trauma types

IE, definitely the darkest take on Disney I have ever done!

(see this post on trauma types)

Lots of Disney characters have had Adverse Childhood Experiences (death of mothers, to start with!) and exhibit signs of traumatic stress. Below are my guesses as to their chosen coping mechanism.

What 4F trauma type is each Disney character below (Fight, Flight, Freeze, Fawn)

Snow White (dead mother, dead father, abusive and neglectful stepmother, stepmother literally tried to have her killed): It’s been a long time since I’ve seen this, but I’d say it’s Fawn-Flight. She is unerringly sweet. Her immediate reaction when in any form of danger (with a strange man, the huntsman, or the dwarves) is to try to appease, appeal, and make friends. She also has a ton of energy (flight), which she channels into obsessive cleaning, though she doesn’t seem to edge far enough into that to call it OCD. She also literally ran away in a segment that makes obvious how her fear drives her to flight.

Cinderella (dead father, abusive and neglectful stepfamily treats her as a slave): another Fawn-Flight. Unfailingly kind and sweet. So desperate for friends that she befriends the MICE. Also an incredibly hard worker (though tbf, her stepfamily forces that on her). When traumatized by stepsisters yanking to pieces her clothing (both a destruction of her hard work and a physical assault) she literally runs away into the garden to cry. She also runs away from the ball at midnight rather than turning back right there and explaining to the prince that she only got to go to the ball through magic because her family is abusive and probably stole her inheritance. Cinderella gets the wish that many with CPTSD have: that somebody would swoop in and rescue them! She gets rescued twice: by her fairy godmother AND by the prince.

Peter Pan (abandoned in Kensington Gardens and brought up by fairies, who are not the most emotionally stable beings out there): Flight. Classic ADHD: response: runs all over the island fighting, flying, and crowing. (Also literally flies.)

Ariel (dead mother, controlling and abusive father): Freeze-Flight. Instead of trying to please her excessively harsh father, like her hard-working singing sisters, Ariel ditches not only practices but CONCERTS in order to get away from her father and lose herself in her collecting hobby. She has a secret place where she hides in order to fantasize about having a different life in an entirely different place, away from her family. Her friends attempt to persuade her that life on land is impracticable for her. But when her father destroys her hidey-hole, she is retraumatized and resorts to flight to someone she thinks can fix her problems for her by making her human and sending her to the surface: she therefore literally runs away, and tries to get both Ursula and Eric to save her and get her away from her father.

Prince Eric: Surprisingly non-traumatized! I mean, as far as I remember.

Belle: non-traumatized? (at least to start with. I mean, we can always suggest Stockholm Syndrome later...) DOES seem to think she’s entirely different from everyone else around her (a common CPTSD symptom). Maybe traumatized by mother’s death? Bullying from the neighbors? Becoming a parentified child to take care of her absent-minded (though affectionate) father? Unaccustomed poverty? In any case, except for the trauma of her father’s near death and her own imprisonment, she is unusually competent and calm. If she edges toward anything, it’s probably Freeze-Flight: she has a pronounced capacity to become absorbed in fiction and ignore everything around her. When irritated by Gaston’s insulting and bullying proposal, she physically retreats entirely from the village in order to sing about how she wants to leave her poor provincial town for the great wide somewhere. She is fixated on escape, either mentally or physically.

Beast (dead parents, raised by servants who deferred to him rather than parenting him): Fight-Freeze. Hides in his castle; when encounters people is an ASSHOLE. Interestingly, Fight-Freeze types are notoriously hard to treat. Belle might have a future in psychotherapy if she can build better boundaries.

Aladdin (dead parents, has to eat to live, has to steal to eat, ostracized by his community, frequently threatened with death or maiming for theft): feels entirely different from the rest of the world. Flight. frequently in a state of frenetic energy, though a lot of that is because he’s stealing food and escaping the cops. His idea of a great date is to get Jasmine away from the palace: to escape and help her to do the same. intense feelings of shame and inferiority (despite his insistence that there’s so much more to him). He tries to hide from Jasmine the truth of his low-rank identity, though he does eventually recognize the need to tell her the truth.

Jasmine: surprisingly untraumatized (mostly just a healthy assertive), considering what she’s been through (dead mother, parentified child of a nice but absent-minded father who, judging from his looks, is closely related to Maurice; isolated from peers and almost everyone but her pet. I mean, there MUST be servants in the palace, but all you ever see are the guards...) She recognizes when people are treating her unfairly and says so, which makes her unusual among Disney heroes and heroines!

Simba (father died, was told it was his fault, was forced to leave home, almost died in the wilderness, subsequently raised by a couple of irresponsible weirdos): Flight. Literally runs away from his problems instead of facing them. Keeps himself busy with Timon and Pumbaa in order to occupy his mind.

Pocahontas: Non-traumatized! (Dead mother, but strong emotional connection with father and strong emotional support system in her community. Not to mention a maternal figure in the shape of a talking tree in whom she can confide.) DOES feel different from everyone else in her community, though. (Are you sensing a theme?)

John Smith (father died when Smith was 16, he left home, went to sea, served as a mercenary, engaged in piracy, fought the Ottomans): Flight. Constantly on the move: seeing new places, meeting new people, and killing them. Overachiever. Can’t sit still in England. However, he does have some healthy assertive skills and is able to stand up to people in power.

Quasimodo (holy emotional abuse, Batman!): Freeze. Taught that the outside world is cruel and wicked and that he can only be safe inside the cathedral. Daydreams to the point where he almost believes the gargoyles come alive and talk to him. Manages to overcome his Freeze instincts to save Esmerelda.

Esmerelda: Not traumatized, despite apparent lack of living parents and her position as an oppressed social minority. Probably the result of loving parenting while they were alive and strong community support from the rest of the Roma of Paris. Another heroine with healthy assertive traits!

Phoebus: Not apparently currently suffering from traumatic stress (though may have had periods of it in the past: he’s a crusader, after all). Surprisingly well-adjusted.

Hercules (kidnapped at a very young age and taken away from a one life to be placed in another, ENTIRELY different life. Despite strong emotional support from adoptive parents, has been rejected and bullied by his community. Feels he is entirely different from everybody else [I mean, he kind of is]): Flight. Yes, that’s right, flight, not fight. Hercules may be a “fighter” but he is a SUPER non-aggressive guy. Gentleness embodied. Feels he has to achieve something huge in order to be worthy of love and affection from the world (and especially from his divine father, who has literally told him that he has to earn his way back to Olypus by becoming a True Hero). Tendency toward despair when the people whose love and affection he thought he had (Phil and Megara) abandon and betray him. Eventually earns everybody’s love and affection--which is not the greatest lesson ever. Shouldn’t Disney be teaching us that we deserve love even if we never become heroes?

Megara (super traumatic history): Fawn-Fight. Puts the good of the people she loves WAY before her own, to an unhealthy level (sacrifices her own soul in order to save a man, who then abandons her). Seems sarcastic and rough, but heart of gold underneath. Acts like she’s superior, but actually feels enormous guilt and shame, with low self-esteem. Won’t say she’s in love.

Mulan (inconsistent expectations from her family and community. Sometimes her family supports who she is, defends her, and puts up with her unusual behavior; at other times they join with her community in criticizing her [lightly if frequently]. They apparently did not teach her society’s gender roles but then expects her to abide by them in public): she feels entirely different from everybody else and that she has to prove herself. Doesn’t know who she is inside. CANNOT behave the way she has been taught she should; is clearly triggered by a criticism from her father. Flight. Seems almost hyperactive, can’t keep silent when her society tells her she should. Driven to act and to succeed in order to prove her worth and bring honor to her family. Again, EARNS everybody’s love and respect in the end.

Shang: Possible inferiority issues from his relationship with her father. Not enough data.

Mushu (constant criticism; scapegoated by the ancestors): Flight. Has channeled this coping mechanism into ADHD (and humor). Feels the need to prove he is worthy of his spot (I mean, the ancestors TOLD him he did...)

Tarzan (storm and fire killed everyone around him in his infancy; parents had to resettle entirely alone in an alien land; parents were brutally killed right in front of him; he was nearly killed and eaten twice by a leopard; adopted by nonhuman animals; rejected by father figure and much of his nonhuman community): Realistically, I WOULD say that Tarzan should not be able to learn to SPEAK, since he doesn’t appear to have acquired language until his mid to late twenties. However, the film makes clear that the gorillas have a complex spoken language that can convey complicated thoughts like, “Jane will stay with Tarzan”. Feels entirely different from the rest of his community (he is). Scapegoated and constantly criticized for being different. I genuinely don’t know what his style is. lol

The elephant in tarzan: It’s been too long since I’ve seen this film, somebody do this one lol

Cuzco (dead parents, running an empire in his early twenties, nobody has apparently ever taught him limits, appears to have a very emotionally isolated life): Fawn-Fight. Extremely narcissistic, though his character development reveals that he does have a conscience underneath there somewhere. Charming but highly self-centered. Good with words and fast-talking, so may be Flight or gifted. Behavior improves quickly and immensely when provided with the emotional support (and healthy boundaries) of an ersatz family.

Lilo (loss of both parents; being parented by a highly stressed and very young adult who is struggling with poverty and her own trauma): Flight. Gifted, imaginative, ADHD, constantly into everything, constantly in trouble. Sometimes slides into Fight with defiant behavior.

Nani (loss of parents, pressure of having to parent her little sister and provide income for both of them at a very young age): Fight. Her temper gets the better of her when she’s upset, but she’s really trying.

Marlin (loss of his wife and all his children but one): Freeze. Constantly hiding from the perceived dangers of the world and trying to teach his son to do the same. Very nurturing of his child, despite his difficulty overcoming his own trauma. Considering he is a Freeze type, going on a big journey to save his son demonstrates ENORMOUS bravery.

Dori (???): Flight-Freeze. ADHD, constantly on the move, can’t sit still, just keeps swimming, just keeps swimming, swimming, swimming. I include Freeze because her difficulties with her memories may be a dissociative effect of trauma, and dissociation falls under Freeze.

Tiana (loss of beloved father, poverty, traumatizing lifelong experience of systemic racism, somewhat ameliorated by loving and supportive mother): Flight. The classic driven, achievement-obsessed workaholic. Always seems to only be halfway there. Fate helps her overcome these tendencies by forcing her to fail in her quest to become human again (and therefore to open her restaurant), though she actually does succeed soon after anyway. Actually, DID she overcome these tendencies? Like, she toned it down enough to maintain an apparently lasting romantic relationship, but she might still be a workaholic...

Naveen (highly critical parents): Flight. Constantly traveling care-for-nothing that can’t seem to stick to anything. Deep down has low self-esteem about his lack of achievement and how he can’t seem to please his parents. Demonstrates some symptoms of ADD or ADHD. Tiana and Naveen demonstrate how “Flight” behaviors can results in two very different character types!

Rapunzel (holy shit: kidnapped in infancy and raised by a woman who is demonstrably emotionally abusive and negligent and literally is only keeping her alive for her hair. Imprisoned in a tower almost entirely without company her ENTIRE LIFE. Demonstrates painful mood swings between delight and horrific guilt when she finally escapes for the first time. I seriously wonder how long her mental recovery took after Mother Gothel’s death...): Flight-Fawn. Overachiever, constantly doing EVERYTHING, EXTREMELY QUICKLY (cleans the entire place top-to-bottom between 7:00 and 7:15 AM). Literally runs away. Makes friends immediately with almost everybody she meets, including a gang of hardened, violent criminals. Wants desperately to be loved, but believes very quickly that Eugene doesn’t like her after all and has abandoned her. Note that it is not Rapunzel that kills Mother Gothel but Pascal. Rapunzel is so emotionally traumatized that she probably could never bring herself to “betray” Gothel in any real way.

Eugene Fitzherbert (orphaned; raised in an institutional setting, which is notoriously traumatizing. Poverty, social rejection): Flight. Channels his immense energy into complicated and daring heists. Adrenaline junkie. He thinks he wants to rest on a deserted island with an enormous pile of money, but I can guarantee that he would get antsy after a week (at most) and go back to his life of crime in order to distract himself from his pain.

Merida (was in a life-endangering encounter with a bear as a young child; her father was maimed. Has emotional support from her father, but her mother--primary caregiver, especially of a daughter--is highly critical): Flight. Tons of energy, adrenaline junkie, climbs a frickin WATERFALL, overachiever in her chosen hobbies. Greatly dislikes quiet pursuits like embroidery, possibly because they leave too much time for contemplation, and she needs more distraction.

Elsa (almost killed her beloved younger sister by accident, treated by her parents as dangerous and frightening, almost entirely isolated for most of her life): Freeze (HAHA) and Flight. Has been taught to retreat alone from a world that will reject her. Experiences enormous shame and guilt for herself, her gifts, and how dangerous she can be. Classic perfectionist. Attempts to protect herself and others by shutting down all emotions. When she fails, she literally runs away to live entirely alone forever to escape the storm of the rest of the world, because the cold of isolation “never bothered her anyway” (an obvious lie she has taught herself). “Let It Go” sounds like an anthem of freedom, but Elsa is actually literally running from her problems and from any human connection.

Anna (almost died as a small child, which she doesn’t directly remember, but may still cause her traumatic reactions. her beloved older sister SUDDENLY refused even to SEE her, and her parents wouldn’t talk about it, so she probably felt in some obscure way that there was something wrong with HER,  that it was all her fault. Then isolated almost entirely in the palace, and certainly isolated from other children, followed by the death of her parents and the CONTINUED isolation from her sister and anybody other than servants): flight-fawn. she seems possibly a little ADD, a little hyperactive (rides her bike around the halls), impulsive. VERY friendly and sweet to almost everybody she meets, desperate to make friends. Dreams of being rescued through marriage to a prince that she loves at first sight. Desperate to be loved.

Moana: probably NOT traumatized, for the most part. She DOES feel entirely different from everybody else (”what is wrong with me?”) because her instinctive love of the ocean has been criticized and squelched by her father and her society. However, despite her father’s clear struggle with his own trauma from the survivor’s guilt of his best friend’s drowning, this is one of the healthier families/societies we see in Disney! The silence around the death of Chief Tui’s best friend is meant to be kind, but I think Tui probably needs to talk it out more, and while I understand why they didn’t tell Moana about it as a young child, I feel like she SHOULD have been told before her father’s reactions to her hurt her own self-image: he’s actually just projecting his own guilt onto the daughter who is so much like him. She is less traumatized than she might otherwise be because she has both her mother, and especially her grandmother, to confide in. If Moana has a trauma style, I would say it’s Flight: she’s an overachiever who is constantly rushing from one task, one way to help, to another. In a deleted song, she also talks about walking around the island so much that she knows exactly how many steps it is to the ocean. She always wants to get away. All of this is classic Flight. Chief Tui is Fight. he’s not aggressive, but he IS controlling.

Maui (Most of the trauma in this film comes from Maui. he was abandoned as a baby, and probably almost died. grew up with the knowledge that he was not wanted by his parents. grew up away from human society): Flight-Fawn. Has spent the rest of his life trying to earn acceptance, love, and gratitude from humans. Constantly does crazy and death-defying tasks to try to win them over., but It never brings him true fulfillment. He clearly DESPERATELY wants to be recognized, celebrated, and loved for his achievements and his gifts, which makes him into a brash show-off.

[ableism-in-anime]

This post is for those who do not know about ableism. What is ableism, you ask? Ableism is the belief that “able-bodied people” or superior to those with disabilities. However, the definition is not only defined by the belief that only non-disabled people can living fulfilling lives, but also that disabled people cannot be strong, that their disability equals weakness, or a fate worse than death. 

I have heard rumors over the last couple of days about Kakashi Retsuden カカシ烈伝 and that the fact that Naruto was sick freaked the people the fuck out. There were cries that single page out of a 200+ novel was bad writing, and now Naruto wouldn’t be able to fight Jigen. 

And that it was lazy writing for an author to have a character become sick or physically weakened. 

First, those who spread rumors without knowing the facts will only be disappointed and spread misinformation. Secondly, we don’t know what Naruto’s illness is. Thirdly, Naruto and Jigen haven’t even met, much less fought. Fourthly, the lazy writing argument is stupid. 

I have heard this line before. 

To quote Levi, “All of them, whining like brats.” Interestingly enough, the character was the focus on the “lazy writing.”

To say that Levi’s death by a suicide bomb by Zeke is the definition of stupid. Would you say that death by starvation or malnutrition is stupid, because a lot of people in the Underground died from those conditions. 

Zeke was in a bind in SNK 114. He could not move, his most feared enemy had him cornered, and he had nothing else on his mind besides ending himself and Levi because of it. It was because of Levi that Zeke’s best plan was to blow themselves up with a bomb. 

How is this stupid?

Oh, I know why. 

People were expecting Levi to die in a blaze of glory, or against some magnificent foe that would end his life. 

Death doesn’t work that way. RL does not work that way. 

And people who say that Levi’s death is “stupid” and that his life is over because he probably lost an arm or a leg...

Is that really true? Someone’s life isn’t over because they lost a leg or an arm. They become part of a community that has survived despite the best of humanity to snuff us out. 

Getting the “Might Guy” treatment is also ableist. Or maybe, it is simply because when Might Guy was saved by Naruto and that he was alive in a wheelchair, fans were in an uproar. 

I remember it well because I too agreed. This was not from a disability standpoint, but from a medical standpoint. Might Guy should have died from the effects of the Eight Gates. His body was crumbling into ashes. The blaze of glory was not an option. Now Might Guy had to spend the rest of his days in a wheelchair. 

Something in the recent anime adaptation made me admire Guy more than anyone else. In the novel, when Kakashi said that he would do anything to heal Might Guy’s legs, Guy told him,

“What do two legs matter? As long as I am by your side...”

That sentence also reflects Levi’s situation too. 

If Levi had something to live for, a friend like Kakashi to live by his side, then perhaps it wouldn’t matter if he was disabled or not. But Erwin is dead, and Levi has failed to kill the Beast Titan again.

The issue is that Levi will, supposedly be “weak” because of his disability. He won’t be able to fight anymore. He won’t fulfill the fantasies that we had for him. 

Death is apparently preferable to becoming weak and the abilities gone, because all people who are in a wheelchair don’t exist and would rather be dead than be weak, right?

Don’t make me laugh. 

As of right now, Naruto’ s illness is unknown. Shikamaru only said. ［ままじゃ、ままナルトの一生…」 It doesn’t mean Naruto is dying. The translation said, “If this continues, for his entire life...” Being sick is similar to a disability by the pity people have towards us, the underestimation people have, always. 

But it does not mean your life is over. It does not mean that you are ready to roll over and die! There are less painful days and more painful ones, but that doesn’t mean that our lives are over. 

Ableism in anime exists. How many times have I seen a weak (typically female) individual bedridden and unable to stand due to illness?

In The Promised Neverland, Lucas, who had physical disabilities and facial scarrs due to fighting demons and used a cane, had “a whole” body with no scarring in the afterlife as he reunited with his friends who died. 

That is almost as bad as people posting pictures of Stephen Hawking walking and standing after his death. 

 If there is a person with a disability, there is a common trope of wanting to be cured by loved ones or the person with the disability itself. Tegami Bachi also had this trope, but Sylvette Suede was at least useful and not used as a pity devise. However, in the last chapter, Sylvette stands out of her wheelchair.

Emil, a blind girl, was an antagonist due to the abuse she suffered as a child and didn’t even get any sympathy from Lag, out of all people, for the complexity of the abuse and the town people’s history. 

It not only paints disability in a negative light, but also ignores the trauma of child abuse, neglect, and emotional abuse Emil suffered through her life only to die at the end.  

What kind of message does that send to people, especially children with disabilities?

Koe no Katachi is a brilliant work. It is not perfect, but the main focus is on redemption and self-love by a former bully, not on the poor life of Shouko.

 In Sunset with Orihara Izaya, the main character Izaya uses a wheelchair. Some, including Izaya state that he deserves to be in the situation he is in now. However, I do not view this as ableism. 

Izaya is a manipulative man with a history of observing his “beloved humans” and observing them destroying their lives. By no means, is he a good character. However, he is not a villain. Shinra, Izaya’s childhood friend, says as much. 

In volume 13 of Durarara!! Izaya and Shizuo try to kill each other one last time. Shizou, using his superhuman strength, throws Izaya against a building that causes internal bleeding, a spinal cord injury, and many other injuries. 

But, hey, Izaya tried to set Shizuo’s building on fire. 

Eventually, Izaya is taken away by his “allies” for treatment. His wounds are massive, and it unknown if he would survive or not. 

Izaya himself states that he deserves the pain. Even though his broken arms and other internal wounds are healed, it causes him great pain to stand or even walk. The author has confirmed that the pain in Izaya’s legs are psychosomatic and are from mental trauma. Two years after the final battle, Izaya’s pain has not improved, because he refuses to go to physical therapy because he deserves the pain for not acknowledging “Shizu-chan” as human. He acknowledges that he has been a coward, and that his love for humans was a selfish one. He did not get close to his “precious humans” and simply observed them. This pinpoints a reason for Izaya’s behavior and psychology. 

Izaya had to raise his twin sisters on his own as a child. His parents were never around, and his “loving” father noticed with concern that Izaya was rather anti-social as a child. Simply observing humans and their behavior continued to be Izaya’s favorite hobby. 

Izaya is afraid to love. He is afraid to be kind because his parents never showed him love in the first place. His sisters said they would be sad “ for a little bit before they would laugh” if he died. 

Izaya distanced himself from his “humans,” cowardly and selfish, as he acknowledged years later.

However, the disability does not stop him from working. Oh, no. That is why I believe Izaya is not a victim of ableism. He continues to work as a information broker and actually helps people. Although he had some involvement in their fathers’ deaths, Izaya is the semi-guardian of two children name Hinami and Haruto after their mothers tried to kill each other and then their children. He saved them from actual death, whereas before, he would have been content to see what “his precious humans would do next” and leaving the children on their own after saving them. 

At the end of the novel, a young couple was freed from bondage because of Izaya. 

He even allows Haruto to spin him around in his wheelchair to the point where he falls off. He does manage to hold onto a coffee table though and transfers his body back into the wheelchair. 

So, before any of you whine about lazy writing, think about ableism. 

SNK 115 

Sunset with Orihara Izaya cover.

[laughterbynight]

I need to rant for a minute

Tumblr isn’t really the place to discuss horse things but if any of my followers are even slightly interested in them I want to address this.

The horses we often think of (domestics) are different animals than mustangs. Same species of course, but it makes a whole hell of a lot of difference for an animal to be shaped by nature mentally and physically.

We have quite a few mustang protection groups popping up on Facebook as of maybe 5-7 years ago. Generally that’s good but you also get groups of people who cannot for the life of them recognize the difference between wild and domestic, and it’s reflected in their actions and words.

I encourage you to question any group that:

Give horses racist aka Indian names

“Saves” foals that were going to die anyway (its harsh but despite what these dramatic groups would have you think, a healthy foal is rarely just abandoned or killed)

Decides if horses should be shot based on the opinions of casually interested fans (mustangs don’t die from the same shit domestics do. They’re very tough but they do need time to heal and not be...shot.)

Any sort of label such as “this stallion is a foal killer” way to perpetuate stereotypes that already fuck over stallions

Anthropomorphism of the horses

Poor results in all of their noble goals (if you’re asking the public for money to dart horses and you only manage a handful out of hundred while you have parties on the public land, something isn’t right.)

Bully and harass people who try to correct their mistakes

Putting out false information (most of these people aren’t brilliant, you’ll notice after reading a few posts that they fib or make shit up pretty recgularly.)

*Don’t question the BLM

Here’s the deal with the last one. Many groups have to play nice with the BLM to some degree because ultimately the BLM decides what happens to these horses (it ain’t pretty). That said, you don’t have to be up their asses either and when you are it’s pretty clear you want the attention you get out of it over the well being of the horses. Make no mistake, no matter how much any individual says they care, the BLM does not want wild horses around. They’d rather have that land used for livestock because that’s profitable, though livestock also destroy the land itself so???

The BLM classifies mustangs as feral, but the science community has known otherwise for a long time now. They’re a return species, which is part of why they do so well here. Horses actually evolved in North America. They’re better suited here than most other places. Overpopulation happens when predators are killed to protect the livestock that use the same land, not because horses are just invasive monsters than override the ecosystem like most feral species. And yes there is fossil evidence to back that up, including as recently as 10,000 years ago which is a blip in time. It’s more likely we lost horses here due to human intervention.

To be blunt, horses have the strange ability to make rational people act batshit. When you see any group doing anything on their behalf I encourage you to look closely and don’t assume they know what they’re doing just because they have the governments blessing to fuck with the horses. I mean the government has tried to literally kill them all multiple times so you can imagine how much they care about the skills and knowledge of the people out there “helping”. That statement is also backed by public documents before anyone comes at me.

As for where I stand, you either need to decide to be hands on or hands off. None of this “when we feel like it” or “this situation is different” bullshit. If you’re okay with taking foals to “rescue” then you better damn well be willing to try and save a mare giving birth. Not shoot her while she’s in labor because no one was going to try and help deliver a stuck foal because nature. If you are going to be hands on for one, it needs to be the other too. Otherwise it becomes a game of favoritism and what looks good to the public, which isn’t why you should be doing this.

Rant over.

[solo1y]

My #RepealThe8th: Part VIII

There were two prongs to the Clonmel end of the campaign of which I was a part. The door-to-door part involved mass-leafleting of the residential areas in and around Clonmel with some light canvassing if the opportunity presented itself. The stall part involved standing near a small table in the middle of O’Connell St. that said “Tipperary Together For Yes”, handing out leaflets and either soliciting conversations from passers-by or waiting for them to ask questions. 

I had earlier expressed my wish to stay as far away from the stalls as possible because I was afraid I would destroy someone’s soul. I try not to start fights with people, but if I know I’m right, I will grind you into the dust and sleep like a baby. And I knew I was right about the Eighth Amendment. 

I’m not going to get into why I know I was right on this particular issue, because that’s not what this series of articles is for. If you want to know how I put together my position on this issue, feel free to consult my #RepealThe8th tag on this blog or my Pro-Choice Explainer on Medium. 

I also have a health problem I don’t fully understand which can poleaxe me for days in a very short amount of time, so I made it very clear that no one could depend on me for anything. As it turns out, my body wouldn’t cluster-shaft me until the final week. 

On the night of Friday the 4th May, there was a slightly urgent tone to the request for stall operatives for Saturday. As it stood, it looked like there would be no one there but Anita. For security reasons, there was no way in hell anyone was going out alone. 

I cannot emphasise enough how every new day presented fresh, compelling evidence of why we needed to take absolutely seriously the threats to our physical and mental well-being. People were routinely being stalked, harassed, and physically and verbally assaulted for nothing more than being identifiably pro-choice. 

We were genuinely a grassroots movement. When I came into it, we had no money and about five t-shirts between us. We’d get little packets of leaflets personally delivered from head office to Seamus Healy’s office, or someone might only be able to go as far as Thurles, and then someone would have to go up to Thurles and get them. One of us. For some fucking leaflets. And this would happen week after week. That’s how grassroots this thing was. In the last week or so of the campaign, things tightened up, but not much. We had nothing of the organisation or budget of the slick, professional No campaign.

I had done some half-hearted stall stuff the previous week with Maebh, who did a sterling job of pretending not to be horrified by every second thing I said. So I decided, without telling anyone, that I would do the stall, again in direct opposition to everything in my personality.

This is Anita, Anne and Catherine at the stall on this day. Again, I am behind the camera. See me, feel me.

Thankfully, for Anita’s sake, it was not just me and Anita. I was stationed on the shady part of the street with Anne from the local branch of People Before Profit. Anne is deeply committed to making the world a better place. I suspect, on her quest to make the world a better place, she does not suffer fools gladly. Or clever people, probably. I’m glad she was on our side. One of the problems she was having (to which I could relate) was that, for once in her life, she was asking people to “vote Yes”, after a lifetime of asking people to say No to various proposals.

At one point, I was approached by a lady who quite aggressively asked me why I was voting Yes. I told her I felt that it was a women’s health issue, which had only been true for me for the previous week or so; up to then it had always been a women’s choice issue. Now it was both. She agreed with me and revealed herself to be a Yes voter, and I had to lower my hackles. She said she was a bit worked up because of the blatantly manipulative horseshit being promulgated by the No people (LoveBoth) who had taken up a weekly residence at the Main Guard. 

We kept getting people at the stalls (and even out leafleting) who couldn't stand the aggressive, self-righteous attitude of many of the No canvassers. Many of these people told us that they were roughly shoved from “Undecided” to “Yes” by tactics they felt were tantamount to bullying. 

After the stall, I went up to Seamus Healy’s office for an afternoon’s leafleting. I had no idea if I was any good on the stall because there was no objective measure of success. With the leafleting, on the other hand, if you’ve delivered 500 leaflets, then at the very least, you have definitely delivered 500 leaflets.  

It was a very sunny day, and we went down Mary St. along the quay, and all the houses around the Gashouse Bridge area. At Parnell St., we stopped for an ice cream. Seamus and Pat thought it might be funny because I had been talking a lot about my type 2 diabetes. 

This is a photo of me, Seamus Healy and Pat English taken on this sunny day which went semi-viral on Twitter. 

This was the first processed sugar I had since January, when I got my diabetes diagnosis, but when Seamus buys you an ice cream, you don’t say no.

Next:  My #RepealThe8th: Part IX

[fibonacciflower6]

The Gold at the End of the Rainbow The modern day structure of the South African landscape was shaped by the political regime which ran over the 20th century called Apartheid. Colonisers whom arrived from abroad, saw South African soils as fertile grounds upon which to land and build a thriving colony. This process was done in a very violent and self-righteous manner, local land dwellers were controlled and removed by thorough means of identity destruction and abuse, and violent means such as trickery, intimidation and very often was the use of guns, murder, rape and force. The local people were first traded with, then tricked into valourising the alien European cultures and handing over land rights in legal documents – which they had never used before. Where there was resistance, Europeans used their violent tools of power – the gun. They believed it was their God-sent right to come and take over this land – an illusion created out of an unbalanced manifestation of power. The gun was not invented out of love - but fear, fear for loss of control and a deep set greed to have more material power. Therefor, the deeply set collective social ideas of the coloniser are rooted in fear – which we know breeds violence, oppression, abuse and suffering. All acts can be analysed as being born out of fear or love. Eventually, much of Southern Africa was colonised, and Europeans began to construct the city structures. Rhodes has been quoted as intentionally adapting and using local forms of the Maya (illusion) of racial hierarchy in his plan to acquire a greater reach of land control – the dream being from Cape to Cairo. In this plan, they intentionally create and raise ideas which subjugate the local black people of the land. The only way to control a person is to take her away from her self-love – because love is freedom, and when a person is not feeling love, or adapts polluted ideas of love – they are controllable. So on and on, the locals of the land were oppressed and their identities abused, their labour exploited and their cultures obliterated. They were pushed into tiny townships and squatter camps, far off from local CBD’s so as not to be a visual nag. The implementation of Apartheid was thorough and lengthly, occurring over generations. That means that some people’s entire experience of life was within this collective mental structure. The system of Apartheid became a physical manifestation of spatial arrangement on the land according to skin colour, but we too often forget in South Africa that this is primarily due to a psychological construct. The structures of Apartheid are mental ones at the core – mental structures and beliefs which are projected into how we behave in a space, construct our space and expect others to participate in our space. Now we reach a point where all South African’s are supposedly ‘free’ because we are all allowed to vote, but the physical and psychological structures of Apartheid are still deeply embedded in the minds of South African people, who still use space in ways which reflect this mental attitude and expect others to conform. Firstly, the cities were constructed in such a way that the wealthiest class was located closest to the CBD’s and everyone else was pushed far out of sight. This still holds today, we see the poorest of the poor, the most oppressed and psychologically abused people living far out in poorly constructed township and squatter camp communities. They spend most of their money on travel over long, timely distances into the city to work their low paying jobs. They cannot escape this cycle of poverty because they don’t have the funds for entreprenearal business start ups or to pay for higher education, and spend all of their money on basic survival needs and transport. They also cannot escape this cycle because it is deeply rooted and embedded in their psychological culture, a mental system of self-hatred and acceptance of abuse, disempowerment and subjugation. They activate this and the oppressor activates this. We see the same reflected in pockets of wealth. The wealthy classes of South Africa are able to operate in an illusion of space that maintains and withholds its wealth and pleasures. They have access to cars and thus beautiful spaces where the poor public transport systems do not go. Their wealth also allows them access to a luxurious kind of lifestyle such as resturaunts, retreats and holiday resorts. They spend little time on travel that is not for pleasure, as they are closely located to the CBD’s and have much money to spend on the pleasures of life. Due to the far out located squatter camps and townships, they don’t often have to think about poverty and people’s social suffering, as they don’t often see it, and when they do – it doesn’t bring up nice emotions so they are easily able to move into better spaces where they don’t have to be exposed to it. Maya. So there are many illusions hovering about in the psyche’s of South African’s, many separate ones. The poor continue to activate their illusions of how they fit into space based on their destructive self-esteems which they continue to activate through violent mannerisms and ways of talking to another. And when they escape this mental form of slavery, it is incredibly 10 fold harder for them to attain the wealth they need to live a better lifestyle and escape the harsh township environment. It is harder because they are so conditioned into self-disbelief, and because they have to overwork and dratstically compromise their health and wellbeing to get enough funds to change their lifestyle. Self abuse is a deeply rooted cultural phenomena. We talk to others the way we talk to ourselves. Blame is violence. My mother grew up a poor black South African woman, and I grew up with a constant stream of verbal, emotional and psychological abuse on my character and way of being. My triumphs, strengths and talents were ignored, and she constantly found ways to criticise my behaviour and ideas. I was often told how I would amount to nothing, how I was lazy, how I was a slut, how I had the wrong priorities, how I was never going to be able to live with anyone or have any successful relationships or functions in society. These were her projections about how she activated her own ideas of herself into spaces. Having grown up in the most oppressed body in the country, she felt severely the difficulties of access to nice and wealthy spaces, how the oppressors protected their ideas of inferiority onto her, that she was stupid, lazy and a whole stream of identity abuses and self-hatred. My mother fought this system, using this violence and abuse as the fuel for her fire, as the energy which she wished to overcome. She spoke down to herself as a way of self-awareness and self-improvement through constant and violent self-destruction. Naturally, life always follows death, these are the natural cycles of existence. We have a natural instinct to survive that kicks in often before we make the conscious decision. So she would constantly destroy herself, and wait for the natural revival of her soul to kick in and carry her through, renewed and improved and better suited to continue her mission. In a social system where she was forced into a lower standard of education, where she was constantly faced with ideas of her inferiority, where she had to work so much harder and save so much more just to make the same money as someone from wealth and love, she managed to save up to get a university degree so she could access the corporate world. She managed to get a job in a space where very few bodies like hers were present, and she had to succeed in the face of violent internal and external criticism, activated by herself and the others in her space. So for her, this is what she knows to be the way to success, the way to economic liberation – and this is why she pushed it on me - it was her way of showing love, a violently polluted and obscured and inherited idea of love, a conditioned idea of love. I could not stand to be around her for this abuse, as my father spoke encouragingly and believingly to me, and the very wealthy schools I was fortunate to attend were filled with people who activated space and ideas in the ways that he did. My father also fell into self-disbelief and I watched him falling into poverty and struggle, yet he still did whatever he could to ensure I had a beautiful and protected experience of life – often sacrificing too much of himself to provide for me and my brother, a very motherly kind of love. I had access to beautiful spaces, was surrounded with people who nurtured and loved themselves, but saw themselves as superior and were ultimately self-righteous, believing in a God-given right to their pleasures. This is a psychological inheritance, we adopt the culture of our forefathers, through cultural activities and projections of how we activate space and expect others around us to activate space. I battled a lot of racial stereotyping and inferioration in school, even once being called a bully ringleader like I was the head of some bully gang, my teacher obviously thought I was from the Cape Flats. Easy scapegoat. So I grew up constantly hearing how the poor of South Africa were lazy, were irresponsibly breeding when they didn’t have the means to support their offspring because they were stupid and didn’t know how to work and behaved so awkwardly and uncomfortably in space. Space which for them, carried the ancestral trauma of arrest, of being stolen by violent means and space which now they had to use in very specific ways which reflected an emotional abuse on their black identities. ‘We don’t like to look at poverty and ugly black people, so put the taxi rank around the back of the city there by the rubbish dump, and make it illegal for them to park and wait anywhere else. ‘ – the oppressor in apartheid city planning. ‘Everyone is looking at me in this suburb as I walk through the streets like maybe I might run into their backyards and steal their television, like I had better get on my way to the taxi rank, cos they can see my old ugly clothes and ugly black skin and it makes them upset so I had better remove myself from their vision.’ – the oppressed, poor and displaced on general daily life experiences. So how do we resolve this issue? The oppressed, first of all, needs to start nourishing healthy identities so that we may develop new psychological ideas of how we fit into space and then activate them. Self love, a reconstruction of the identity bound to the body we inhabit. Growing up surrounded by Caucasians and their ideas of beauty and how this activated in space, I adopted the same ones, and opened up an abusive battlefield onto my own body. I hated my frizzy, curly hair, and feared the darkening of my complexion, which would read as a marker for people to project limited and unbelonging projections of how I behave in space onto me. Once, my friend joked with her friend in my presence, about how funny and annoying it is when little n***ers jump out the bushes into the road in front of her car to cross the road, and how funny and stupid they looked. They laughed. This had made my stomach churn. In this sentence, we can analyse a number of inherited psychological structures of how we activate space and expect others to. Firstly, the n***er jumping out of the bush, is an inherited idea of how black people – the inferior and stupid, belong far out in the bushes and are misplaced within the civilised city structures and roads. Secondly, the fact that the n***er is jumping in front of her car, shows her expectation of the nigger to behave in a way which shows a disregard for his safety and wellbeing due to a lack of intelligence. So she assumes this is how he treats himself. Thirdly, the fact that the n***er is walking and she is in her car, shows the different ways in which the rich and poor are using space, the n***er has to walk around and constantly make way for the rich and foreign structures of roads and cars who have right of way on this land. She can experience him from the distance and safety of her car, the vessel of her privelage to and from beautiful spaces in her Maya – or illusion of space. He may be late, has to catch the 6pm taxi which is 4 km’s from the house in which he is employed as a low payed garden boy, and has to run there to be on time. He jumps into the road, sure he can make it across in time because inheritantly he knows that cars and privelage have right of way on this land and he activates that belief by adhering to it. Let me tell you that in India, ain’t no such thing! Cows and people have right of way on any road (Maybe not the larger metropoles), and the cars and privelage just have to make their way around it – and they do so peacefully because they are aware of their privelage to be in a car in that regard, and everyone in India is just more invested in peace and not aggression. He is performing her projection, allowing her to continue her belief of having right of way because if he walks slowly across, she will violently put him back in line by hooting or yelling a stream of violent abuses out her window – the corrective, controlling and authoritative behaviour which she inherited from her forefathers who roamed the land with guns forcing n***ers out the way to their god-sent missons to own the space and make the rules in it. The niggers allowed it because they chose to act out of fear of that gun instead of love for their own freedom and rights to space – and in the face of a gun, I may have done the same. In the face of needing to cross the road, I may probably have also sacrificed my personal need of catching the 6pm taxi to get home and make dinner for my kids who walked home from school, just so I wouldn’t have to deal with the stream of violent abuse that would come my way if I walked. I would sacrifice myself to choose peace, isn’t that a motherly love? Lastly, the fact that my friend could say this abusive and offensive statement in my presence, aware that I have a body of colour, that I have black in me, shows how she expected me to adhere and conform to her ideas of what is and isn’t normal behaviour in a space, and allow the forceful, violent, verbal abuse of my identity on my body in her presence. I, let it slide, because I would rather have peace in that moment than face the harsh aggression and argument that would come if I spoke up and told her how offensive it was, the aggressive demon of denial would come out and bite me back into line. But by allowing it, I allowed abuse on my own body and identity. I am responsible for that in my own direct space and experience. This could also be seen enacted in my violent relationship with my mother. During her alcoholic days, she would get drunk almost every night and sit, letting off a stream of abuses onto my silent body. The nights I felt fire in my belly stood up for myself and replied that she should stop talking to me in that way – she would get aggressive and raise her voice, putting me back into place as the submissive child. If I did not submit, it got physical. This same pattern occurred with my dad and his girlfriend, and I became a nomad from the age of 13 after attempting to commit suicide, living in one home for 2 to 3 months until a violent fight broke out when I demanded the end of violent emotional abuse to my character, then getting kicked out and having to go stay with my mom or a friend, until I became a nag there and had to leave again. This pattern of abuse can also be analysed to be a number of various kinds of psychological activations of space anywhere you go. Firstly, alcoholism is a huge issue in South Africa, where we have some of the highest rates of alcoholism and alcohol related violence in the world. Back in the day, slaves were payed in alcohol on the wine farms in Cape Town. In fact, all over Africa we see the payment of alcohol for exploitative labour being carried out by the coloniser. Alcohol is one of the most damaging drugs to the body - the consumption of which can only occur as a result of an abusive attitude towards self. We are unhappy in our daily lives and hate ourselves, never feeling good enough in our own skin and always wishing to have the pleasures we see on someone else, always not acknowledging our own strengths, talents and gifts and wishing to possess external ones of some external idol because we don’t believe in ourselves. Maybe because our parents didn’t believe in us and conditioned us into that behaviour, or maybe because our society flaunts packaged ideals to which we are all expected to work towards to perform within the system of capitalism. Work hard, dress corporate, rock a straight style bob hair cut and get your very own A Class Mercedes Benz. Then you’ll fit into your suburbian community and get the external admiration you never gave yourself. These expectations were placed onto me, and wanting to be the free artist, I rejected them, causing my mother much stress. How was I going to be well off if I didn’t conform, become an accountant, corporate queen – because that is what worked for her! And she loves me and wants to see me thrive, so she will continue to exert the aggressive force that worked on her. But I do not perceive these conditioned ideas of love as love, because I know they are not, because when I activated these behaviours I opened the door to a stream of violences upon my body which caused me suffering, and I trusted the Buddha when he said suffering is not love, I could feel from somewhere deep inside me that this was truth. What violent acts of self-destruction did I engage in though? To fit into my community of wealth? Firstly, my hair was not ‘beautiful’ so I burnt it over and over with hot irons and chemicals. I stayed out of the sun so I would blend into the white crowd better to feel a rightful energy about how my body fitted into spaces. I did these things and they brought me joy and community with the wealthy peers that surrounded me, and I needed that sense of community and love because at home my mother rejected and abused me for not conforming to her culturally inherited patterns of self abuse. I conducted different kinds of self abuses, ones on physical appearance in order to fit in. But did I fit in? No, I was not actually white nor wealthy, nor black and in dire poverty, and so the cost of maintaining this false appearance became higher and higher. I compensated by working more and more jobs on the side from high school, waitressing at Hooters from the age of 16 in order to feel both beautiful and be rewarded externally for it in money, then I could use that money to continue my patterns of physical self destruction to keep receiving external acceptance and conditioned approval of my appearance. Because deep down inside, I despised my natural appearance, I had no self love because I didn’t fit into anyone’s ideas of beauty, gifted or talented. I depended on external love for that validation. I despised my appearance because in my society, black was ugly, black was misplaced and black needed to be out of beautiful vision. If I rocked my black appearance, I would be operating within a set of social space projections where I would be expected to stay to the side, where I would be reminded of my inferiority, sloth and stupidity - all these social inheritances from the violent acts and cultures of our forefathers. As humans, it is our natural desire to fit into a community, we need the support, acceptance and love of a community in order to feel good, to feel belonging. We also crave beauty, because beauty enhances our pleasure and lives. We see beauty in the spaces around us and we feel beautiful on the inside, because the external is a reflection of the internal. How we operate in the external is a reflection of our internal structures, from the micro to the macro – from the individual to the collective. If we are emotionally and psychologically abusive towards our own true beings, never acknowledging our own natural gifts , strengths and talents – we will do this to our physical bodies by means of destructive addictions like alcoholism; applying toxic chemicals to our skin and hair and aggressively defending and forcing those habits onto those around us. My mother believes she is stupid, because her whole life her community and experience of space and place told her she was such – that was the violent social conditioning of apartheid - of what happens when you force youself into someone else’s space and disrespect them, telling them they are shit and it is your God-given right to own and control this beautiful land and forcing them to behave in a way which they have to believe it. Her ancestors were raped in colonial slave brothels as a result of this God-given right to enter and dictate control. So much mental trauma in her genes from generation to generation and even though she is still racking up degrees to this day, I can see deep down she believes she is stupic and inadequate and that is her motivation. Fear. You as the oppressor, are acting out of fear and not love, because you feel the need to conquer an external beauty and will enforce suffering to attain it, so you march into a foreign land and subjugate the locals to have possession over this beautiful land. Because, deep down, you share the same fear. You crave external beauty because you do not have self-love, you do not believe in your natural beauty. So you regiment a structure or culture to which you and your community strictly adhere – wearing tight corsets that crush your ribs and suffocate your lungs to look beautiful. Pumping chemicals into your lips and paying thousands for technological rapes like laser therapy and liposuction. You bleach your hair and rip out the hairs in your sensitive spots to adhere to an external idea of beauty because when surrounded by beauty you feel beautiful and you feel what you believe to be love. You seek to attain your community’s conditioned idea of beauty for you seek to experience love. You are committing violence onto your own body, and so externally, this violence is committed upon those who do not fit into your idea of beauty, which you think gives you the right to aggressively put them back into line – via use of your gun, raised voice or assertive instruction. You think they are not beautiful, so you force them out of your sight and site and construct a Maya, or illusion to live within. Such as Camp’s Bay. You (now the oppressed or my mother) are acting out of fear and not love, because you fear death, fear the gun and would rather allow the abuse as a natural survival instinct, which causes abuse to the rightfulness of your own intellectual power to disseminate what is wrong and right. You conformed, and you told your children to conform. So from a place of fear, fear that she was inadequate and stupid, because society also confirmed this for her on the external, my mother worked and worked and worked ten times harder than those around her, with her lower education and violent self-destruction, to be on their level, to have community with wealth, her white corporate ‘peers’ so she could receive external, conditioned admiration and love. And for her, this was freedom, this was empowerment - to have money and power and feel the freedom that she watched her oppressor owning while growing up and was told she and her people could never have. She was looking for love, and we are all looking for love, and love is the very core structure of the entire universe. And so even when she was acting out of fear, she was working towards attaining love. External or internal, love is love. Seeking it by external action, or seeking it by internal analysis, it is still love we are all seeking. Seeking it by pushing external change or internal psychological change, it is still love you are chasing. It is still love from which your actions are born, maintained and die in. It is still out of love that you construct your illusions, that you maintain you illusions, and still out of love that you destroy and rebuild them. It is still out of love that you fight, that you oppress and that you inflict suffering, and still out of love that you heal, nurture and accept - allowing others to just be, with understanding and surrender to their psychological projections and physical actions. One way is external and associated with masculine energy, patriarchy and force – fatherly love. Ego is fear, ego and force of structure, and the ego never surrenders. The other is associated with feminine energy, the internal and soft way, the peaceful and accepting way which requires constant surrender – this is motherly love. We are all born from a mother and die back into the earth or Mother Nature. Pacha Mamma. Gaia. Surrender is a spiritual attitude, a union between masculine and feminine energy and the highest way of living. Patriarchy is all a part of existence – as is suffering, pain and violence. So we needn’t chastice ourselves or men for the violences we have committed against ourselves and others. But if we want to we can. We should try act more out of the ways of soft love if we want more to live in peace and acceptance – turning more to internal reflections, criticism and external acceptance. But external work is also essentially love, so we have hurt and burned ourselves and others, but we needn’t continue when we realise that it was all love in the end. The left half of our body is where our heart is more situated, the side associated with femininity, and as far as the internal reflects the external, this must mean that the behaviours of love are more situated within the ways of the feminine, the ways of nature and surrender and acceptance. That is why the divine feminine energy is one of independence, of community, of sharing, sacrifice and healing, of leadership and also accepts support and surrender to her way. However she is also the destroyer when she needs to be, externally violent and destructive to initiate change for healing and regrowth. This must mean that matriarchy is the natural order of earth-dwelling, the more peaceful and loving path for the larger collective. Because we are all born from a mother and die to a mother. But we cannot say that any other way is wrong, because all action, all the varieties of Maya, all lead to love and are essentially born from love. And now the mind begins to fail, words and logic begins to fail and all begins to collapse in on itself. Contradictions in every circumstance and thought pattern arise. There is no right way and wrong way, there is no duality. There is only love. And everything is made of it. Heart centered living is the eternal way. And so what is life then? Why do we have suffering and illusion? What is the point of all of this? Life is but a dance, a game, a play. A movement of energy in an infinite explosion of forms, all just motions of love. This is why the artist is a teacher, because they constantly play and create and break rules to share a variety of kinds of beauty, enhancing our experience of life. When we remember this, we can dance and love and feel light. When we forget its a game, it’s okay, its all part of the natural cycle of movement - but it will bring you more peace to be compassionate and loving in your suffering, allowing others to remember the dance, the play - the Leela. I am Lila Nomfundo Giselle Le Roux. In my Maya, I am creating art and holding spiritual ceremony in spaces where I can bring people back to this truth. Connecting people across all imagined divisions and separations of race, age, gender, nationality and class. Due to my heightened ability to see truth, I have become hyper sensitive to busy spaces, to authority and crowds which trigger violent panic attacks, mental collapses and depression in me. I have come to a point in my heart based living that I trust and know where I need to be and when to share my love and be received. It is something beyond mind, something that I cannot explain in words and logic, something moving through me – my destiny. I have come from severe suffering in this life and now I choose to live in love and share that love, so I ask for any possible support in my journey to attaining my dream of collaborating world peace though my art and travels. The more I travel the more I am able to see and understand the various ways of people of this earth, so I can teach and share this great union. This is my work. My work is love. <3 If everyone on my FB donated 1 dollar or R13 rand, I would have enough to go =) please share!  JAH LOVE https://gogetfunding.com/brazil-art-residency-fund-3/ #freetheniplle #freetheafro #freeeverything #freedom#love #union #yoga #jahlioness #bless#consciousart #publicintervention #fineart #art#support #sharelove

[trendingnewsb]

The prison monitor sacked after voicing her concerns – BBC News

Image copyright Laurence Cawley

Image caption When a letter arrived bearing official Ministry of Justice markings, Faith Spear knew her time monitoring prisons had come to an end

She was the watchdog who was accused of causing “embarrassment” by ministers and driven to the depths of despair after voicing concerns about prison monitoring. Then serious rioting erupted at several English prisons. Was Faith Spear right to blow the whistle on the state of England’s jails?

Her fate was sealed with a printed, rather than handwritten, ministerial signature.

Received on a cold morning this January, Faith Spear, the suspended chairman of the Independent Monitoring Board (IMB) at Hollesley Bay in Suffolk, knew what the letter from prisons minister Sam Gyimah would say.

She had, he told her, “repeatedly disclosed classified and other information, often in an inaccurate manner” and had “failed to comply with agreed policies and procedures”.

Her role as chairman was terminated and she was told she could not serve on another IMB for at least five years.

To this day Mrs Spear believes she was punished by a system more interested in controlling its own reputation than listening to grave concerns over the state of prisons.

Image copyright Getty Images

The spark for the Faith Spear case was an article published by The Prisons Handbook in April 2016 entitled “Whistle-blower without a whistle”.

Using the pseudonym “Daisy Mallett”, Mrs Spear challenged the idea that monitoring boards were truly independent.

“I want to speak out,” said Mrs Spear in the article, which named neither individuals nor her own prison. “I am here as the public’s eyes and ears, that is my role, but my voice is silenced.

“Prisons today are starved of resources. When I make the prison aware of issues with prisoners I am made to feel like I’m an irritation to them, but I am not here to irritate the prison process.”

The repercussions were immediate.

A letter was fired off from the HQ of the Independent Monitoring Boards Secretariat – housed in the Ministry of Justice London HQ – to every IMB member in the country.

In it, president John Thornhill alleged Daisy Mallett’s article contained “inaccuracies and misunderstandings”.

He warned the Justice Secretary (then Michael Gove) had been alerted and “legal advice” sought.

In less than a year, Mrs Spear would be unmasked, suspended, involved in various hearings and ultimately sacked from her voluntary role as an IMB chairman.

Her experience echoes that of Ray Bewry, who to this day is the only former prisoner (his conviction was eventually quashed) to have served on an IMB.

“Any effective IMB member cannot do their job,” claims Mr Bewry who served for a decade on the IMB at HMP Norwich.

“They want them to do what they are told, and not rock the boat.”

Image copyright Laurence Cawley

Image caption At no stage did Mrs Spear seek to deny being Daisy Mallett

Having revealed she had three years of service and a degree in criminology, the outing of Daisy Mallett was perhaps inevitable.

Sure enough, within days of publication Mrs Spear, a mother of three, was called at home by then vice chairman Christine Smart asking her if she was behind the article.

Mrs Spear confirmed that she was.

And at the April 2016 meeting of her IMB board, Mrs Spear was made to read out a statement confessing to being the author of the offending article.

She was then expected to resign.

“It had already been planned as to how it was going be,” she said. “I was ambushed.”

“Faith just walked on to a minefield,” says Mr Leech, the Thailand-based founder and editor of The Prisons Handbook.

“She should have refused to answer any questions and just move on with her business as chairman.”

Perhaps. But hindsight is a beautiful thing.

Image copyright Parliament TV

Image caption Faith Spear is a known regular at Justice Committee meetings in Parliament

“I read my statement then had 50 minutes of every member questioning me, bullying me, taunting me. It was one of the worst experiences I have endured,” Mrs Spear says.

Sent outside for 40 minutes, she was then told her board had unanimously decreed she should “step down as chairman”.

“If I did not, there was an ultimatum,” she said. “They would not work with me.”

So what caused such a revolt?

Mr Leech believes the most likely trigger was that Mrs Spear “criticised the recruitment process”.

This, he said, was tantamount to suggesting some IMB members were not up to the job.

Image copyright Martin Barber

Image caption Ray Bewry is the only former prisoner to have served on an IMB

The IMB Secretariat told the BBC it encourages members “to engage in the national debate on prison standards” though it cautioned “this must be a way that does not compromise their independence and draws upon evidence and experience”.

The secretariat would not comment on the “specifics” of Mrs Spear’s case saying “any questions on the termination of an IMB member should be directed to the MoJ press office as these are ministerial appointments”.

Something else happened while Mrs Spear was absent from the boardroom. Nomination forms were created for her successor and a new vice chairman.

Mrs Spear only learned of this because a fellow member broke ranks and sent a chain of emails to her.

One, from Mrs Spear’s predecessor Dr David Smith to the then vice chairman Christine Smart, concerned “nominees for board positions”.

In it, he wrote: “A delicate one, that was devised in the hope or expectation that Faith would resign.

“She has not and if she became aware that nominations had been requested, it would add fuel to the fire.”

“I suppose we could always tear up the nomination forms and pretend it never happened.”

Mr Leech, who was also sent copies of the leaked emails, said: “What we had here were people saying ‘we will just rip it up and pretend it never happened’.”

Image copyright Laurence Cawley

Image caption Joseph Spear told how his wife ceased eating properly after the board meeting revolt

The BBC approached Dr Smith and Mrs Smart about both the attempt to get Mrs Spear to stand down and the leaked emails.

Dr Smith declined to explain what he intended by his emails to fellow board members.

However, he said an investigation into the matter had concluded that those “complained about had no case to answer as the allegations against them had not been substantiated”.

Mrs Smart too said the matter had been “independently investigated and reported to the minister and a decision taken” adding: “I have nothing further to add.”

The Ministry of Justice was asked whether the nomination forms were a contravention of IMB rules and whether it felt Mrs Spear’s allegations of bullying behaviour against fellow IMB members had been properly investigated. Neither question was answered.

Both Mrs Smart and Dr Smith subsequently resigned from the IMB of Hollesley Bay.

For weeks after that fateful meeting in April, Mrs Spear continued to carry out prison visits at Hollesley Bay.

And at the May 2016 board meeting, she found herself sitting alone.

“Faith wasn’t eating properly,” says Mrs Spear’s husband of 30 years, Joseph.

“There have been some real lows. Seeing the physical and mental impact on Faith in front of me was remarkable.”

During this time, she spoke about her experience to the East Anglian Daily Times (EADT).

In June, she found she had been suspended. A letter from previous prisons minister Andrew Selous cited the EADT article – and not the Prisons Handbook piece – as grounds for the suspension .

Image copyright Getty Images

Image caption A few months after Mrs Spear was suspended, her worst fears about prisons were realised with a string of riots including at Bedford , Birmingham and Swaleside in Kent

The letter told her she was accused of “failing to treat colleagues with respect” and for “acting in a manner which could bring discredit or cause embarrassment to the IMB”.

“It was just astonishing what people had engineered against her,” says Mr Spear. “I have seen her rebound and find her feet and a place to rearticulate the issues she was concerned about.”

Independent Monitoring Boards are “part of the UK’s obligations to the United Nations for independent monitoring of prisons”, says Mr Leech.

“IMBs need to be fit for purpose. They are not. They are groomed to be quiet.”

The Ministry of Justice said: “We value the work of Independent Monitoring Boards which play a vital role in ensuring prisons are places of safety and reform.”

A few months after Mrs Spear was suspended, her worst fears were realised with a string of prison riots at places such as Bedford , Birmingham, Lewes and Swaleside in Kent.

At Bedford, 1m of damage was caused while in Birmingham stairwells were set alight and paper records destroyed during trouble on four wings of the category B prison.

The IMB Secretariat issued a statement on the riots. Its irony was not lost on Mrs Spear.

In it, Mr Thornhill claimed: “IMB members have regularly expressed great frustration that their real concerns about the state of prisons has been largely ignored over the years.”

He spoke of “serious issues” and “staff shortages”, words not too far removed from Mrs Spear’s own warnings that prisons were being “starved of resources”.

And then, in January, she was sacked as IMB chairman.

“The crisis in our prisons has never been as bad as it is now,” says Mr Leech.

“In the case of the Faith, they shot the messenger and they did not read the message.”

Photography: Laurence Cawley and Martin Barber

Read more: http://ift.tt/2tc20Yr

from Viral News HQ http://ift.tt/2tHAYf9 via Viral News HQ

[mavwrekmarketing]

Image copyright Laurence Cawley

Image caption When a letter arrived bearing official Ministry of Justice markings, Faith Spear knew her time monitoring prisons had come to an end

She was the watchdog who was accused of causing “embarrassment” by ministers and driven to the depths of despair after voicing concerns about prison monitoring. Then serious rioting erupted at several English prisons. Was Faith Spear right to blow the whistle on the state of England’s jails?

Her fate was sealed with a printed, rather than handwritten, ministerial signature.

Received on a cold morning this January, Faith Spear, the suspended chairman of the Independent Monitoring Board (IMB) at Hollesley Bay in Suffolk, knew what the letter from prisons minister Sam Gyimah would say.

She had, he told her, “repeatedly disclosed classified and other information, often in an inaccurate manner” and had “failed to comply with agreed policies and procedures”.

Her role as chairman was terminated and she was told she could not serve on another IMB for at least five years.

To this day Mrs Spear believes she was punished by a system more interested in controlling its own reputation than listening to grave concerns over the state of prisons.

Image copyright Getty Images

The spark for the Faith Spear case was an article published by The Prisons Handbook in April 2016 entitled “Whistle-blower without a whistle”.

Using the pseudonym “Daisy Mallett”, Mrs Spear challenged the idea that monitoring boards were truly independent.

“I want to speak out,” said Mrs Spear in the article, which named neither individuals nor her own prison. “I am here as the public’s eyes and ears, that is my role, but my voice is silenced.

“Prisons today are starved of resources. When I make the prison aware of issues with prisoners I am made to feel like I’m an irritation to them, but I am not here to irritate the prison process.”

The repercussions were immediate.

A letter was fired off from the HQ of the Independent Monitoring Boards Secretariat – housed in the Ministry of Justice London HQ – to every IMB member in the country.

In it, president John Thornhill alleged Daisy Mallett’s article contained “inaccuracies and misunderstandings”.

He warned the Justice Secretary (then Michael Gove) had been alerted and “legal advice” sought.

In less than a year, Mrs Spear would be unmasked, suspended, involved in various hearings and ultimately sacked from her voluntary role as an IMB chairman.

Her experience echoes that of Ray Bewry, who to this day is the only former prisoner (his conviction was eventually quashed) to have served on an IMB.

“Any effective IMB member cannot do their job,” claims Mr Bewry who served for a decade on the IMB at HMP Norwich.

“They want them to do what they are told, and not rock the boat.”

Image copyright Laurence Cawley

Image caption At no stage did Mrs Spear seek to deny being Daisy Mallett

Having revealed she had three years of service and a degree in criminology, the outing of Daisy Mallett was perhaps inevitable.

Sure enough, within days of publication Mrs Spear, a mother of three, was called at home by then vice chairman Christine Smart asking her if she was behind the article.

Mrs Spear confirmed that she was.

And at the April 2016 meeting of her IMB board, Mrs Spear was made to read out a statement confessing to being the author of the offending article.

She was then expected to resign.

“It had already been planned as to how it was going be,” she said. “I was ambushed.”

“Faith just walked on to a minefield,” says Mr Leech, the Thailand-based founder and editor of The Prisons Handbook.

“She should have refused to answer any questions and just move on with her business as chairman.”

Perhaps. But hindsight is a beautiful thing.

Image copyright Parliament TV

Image caption Faith Spear is a known regular at Justice Committee meetings in Parliament

“I read my statement then had 50 minutes of every member questioning me, bullying me, taunting me. It was one of the worst experiences I have endured,” Mrs Spear says.

Sent outside for 40 minutes, she was then told her board had unanimously decreed she should “step down as chairman”.

“If I did not, there was an ultimatum,” she said. “They would not work with me.”

So what caused such a revolt?

Mr Leech believes the most likely trigger was that Mrs Spear “criticised the recruitment process”.

This, he said, was tantamount to suggesting some IMB members were not up to the job.

Image copyright Martin Barber

Image caption Ray Bewry is the only former prisoner to have served on an IMB

The IMB Secretariat told the BBC it encourages members “to engage in the national debate on prison standards” though it cautioned “this must be a way that does not compromise their independence and draws upon evidence and experience”.

The secretariat would not comment on the “specifics” of Mrs Spear’s case saying “any questions on the termination of an IMB member should be directed to the MoJ press office as these are ministerial appointments”.

Something else happened while Mrs Spear was absent from the boardroom. Nomination forms were created for her successor and a new vice chairman.

Mrs Spear only learned of this because a fellow member broke ranks and sent a chain of emails to her.

One, from Mrs Spear’s predecessor Dr David Smith to the then vice chairman Christine Smart, concerned “nominees for board positions”.

In it, he wrote: “A delicate one, that was devised in the hope or expectation that Faith would resign.

“She has not and if she became aware that nominations had been requested, it would add fuel to the fire.”

“I suppose we could always tear up the nomination forms and pretend it never happened.”

Mr Leech, who was also sent copies of the leaked emails, said: “What we had here were people saying ‘we will just rip it up and pretend it never happened’.”

Image copyright Laurence Cawley

Image caption Joseph Spear told how his wife ceased eating properly after the board meeting revolt

The BBC approached Dr Smith and Mrs Smart about both the attempt to get Mrs Spear to stand down and the leaked emails.

Dr Smith declined to explain what he intended by his emails to fellow board members.

However, he said an investigation into the matter had concluded that those “complained about had no case to answer as the allegations against them had not been substantiated”.

Mrs Smart too said the matter had been “independently investigated and reported to the minister and a decision taken” adding: “I have nothing further to add.”

The Ministry of Justice was asked whether the nomination forms were a contravention of IMB rules and whether it felt Mrs Spear’s allegations of bullying behaviour against fellow IMB members had been properly investigated. Neither question was answered.

Both Mrs Smart and Dr Smith subsequently resigned from the IMB of Hollesley Bay.

For weeks after that fateful meeting in April, Mrs Spear continued to carry out prison visits at Hollesley Bay.

And at the May 2016 board meeting, she found herself sitting alone.

“Faith wasn’t eating properly,” says Mrs Spear’s husband of 30 years, Joseph.

“There have been some real lows. Seeing the physical and mental impact on Faith in front of me was remarkable.”

During this time, she spoke about her experience to the East Anglian Daily Times (EADT).

In June, she found she had been suspended. A letter from previous prisons minister Andrew Selous cited the EADT article – and not the Prisons Handbook piece – as grounds for the suspension .

Image copyright Getty Images

Image caption A few months after Mrs Spear was suspended, her worst fears about prisons were realised with a string of riots including at Bedford , Birmingham and Swaleside in Kent

The letter told her she was accused of “failing to treat colleagues with respect” and for “acting in a manner which could bring discredit or cause embarrassment to the IMB”.

“It was just astonishing what people had engineered against her,” says Mr Spear. “I have seen her rebound and find her feet and a place to rearticulate the issues she was concerned about.”

Independent Monitoring Boards are “part of the UK’s obligations to the United Nations for independent monitoring of prisons”, says Mr Leech.

“IMBs need to be fit for purpose. They are not. They are groomed to be quiet.”

The Ministry of Justice said: “We value the work of Independent Monitoring Boards which play a vital role in ensuring prisons are places of safety and reform.”

A few months after Mrs Spear was suspended, her worst fears were realised with a string of prison riots at places such as Bedford , Birmingham, Lewes and Swaleside in Kent.

At Bedford, 1m of damage was caused while in Birmingham stairwells were set alight and paper records destroyed during trouble on four wings of the category B prison.

The IMB Secretariat issued a statement on the riots. Its irony was not lost on Mrs Spear.

In it, Mr Thornhill claimed: “IMB members have regularly expressed great frustration that their real concerns about the state of prisons has been largely ignored over the years.”

He spoke of “serious issues” and “staff shortages”, words not too far removed from Mrs Spear’s own warnings that prisons were being “starved of resources”.

And then, in January, she was sacked as IMB chairman.

“The crisis in our prisons has never been as bad as it is now,” says Mr Leech.

“In the case of the Faith, they shot the messenger and they did not read the message.”

Photography: Laurence Cawley and Martin Barber

Read more: http://ift.tt/2tc20Yr

The post The prison monitor sacked after voicing her concerns – BBC News appeared first on MavWrek Marketing by Jason

http://ift.tt/2uPIzHf

[trendingnewsb]

The prison monitor sacked after voicing her concerns – BBC News

Image copyright Laurence Cawley

Image caption When a letter arrived bearing official Ministry of Justice markings, Faith Spear knew her time monitoring prisons had come to an end

She was the watchdog who was accused of causing “embarrassment” by ministers and driven to the depths of despair after voicing concerns about prison monitoring. Then serious rioting erupted at several English prisons. Was Faith Spear right to blow the whistle on the state of England’s jails?

Her fate was sealed with a printed, rather than handwritten, ministerial signature.

Received on a cold morning this January, Faith Spear, the suspended chairman of the Independent Monitoring Board (IMB) at Hollesley Bay in Suffolk, knew what the letter from prisons minister Sam Gyimah would say.

She had, he told her, “repeatedly disclosed classified and other information, often in an inaccurate manner” and had “failed to comply with agreed policies and procedures”.

Her role as chairman was terminated and she was told she could not serve on another IMB for at least five years.

To this day Mrs Spear believes she was punished by a system more interested in controlling its own reputation than listening to grave concerns over the state of prisons.

Image copyright Getty Images

The spark for the Faith Spear case was an article published by The Prisons Handbook in April 2016 entitled “Whistle-blower without a whistle”.

Using the pseudonym “Daisy Mallett”, Mrs Spear challenged the idea that monitoring boards were truly independent.

“I want to speak out,” said Mrs Spear in the article, which named neither individuals nor her own prison. “I am here as the public’s eyes and ears, that is my role, but my voice is silenced.

“Prisons today are starved of resources. When I make the prison aware of issues with prisoners I am made to feel like I’m an irritation to them, but I am not here to irritate the prison process.”

The repercussions were immediate.

A letter was fired off from the HQ of the Independent Monitoring Boards Secretariat – housed in the Ministry of Justice London HQ – to every IMB member in the country.

In it, president John Thornhill alleged Daisy Mallett’s article contained “inaccuracies and misunderstandings”.

He warned the Justice Secretary (then Michael Gove) had been alerted and “legal advice” sought.

In less than a year, Mrs Spear would be unmasked, suspended, involved in various hearings and ultimately sacked from her voluntary role as an IMB chairman.

Her experience echoes that of Ray Bewry, who to this day is the only former prisoner (his conviction was eventually quashed) to have served on an IMB.

“Any effective IMB member cannot do their job,” claims Mr Bewry who served for a decade on the IMB at HMP Norwich.

“They want them to do what they are told, and not rock the boat.”

Image copyright Laurence Cawley

Image caption At no stage did Mrs Spear seek to deny being Daisy Mallett

Having revealed she had three years of service and a degree in criminology, the outing of Daisy Mallett was perhaps inevitable.

Sure enough, within days of publication Mrs Spear, a mother of three, was called at home by then vice chairman Christine Smart asking her if she was behind the article.

Mrs Spear confirmed that she was.

And at the April 2016 meeting of her IMB board, Mrs Spear was made to read out a statement confessing to being the author of the offending article.

She was then expected to resign.

“It had already been planned as to how it was going be,” she said. “I was ambushed.”

“Faith just walked on to a minefield,” says Mr Leech, the Thailand-based founder and editor of The Prisons Handbook.

“She should have refused to answer any questions and just move on with her business as chairman.”

Perhaps. But hindsight is a beautiful thing.

Image copyright Parliament TV

Image caption Faith Spear is a known regular at Justice Committee meetings in Parliament

“I read my statement then had 50 minutes of every member questioning me, bullying me, taunting me. It was one of the worst experiences I have endured,” Mrs Spear says.

Sent outside for 40 minutes, she was then told her board had unanimously decreed she should “step down as chairman”.

“If I did not, there was an ultimatum,” she said. “They would not work with me.”

So what caused such a revolt?

Mr Leech believes the most likely trigger was that Mrs Spear “criticised the recruitment process”.

This, he said, was tantamount to suggesting some IMB members were not up to the job.

Image copyright Martin Barber

Image caption Ray Bewry is the only former prisoner to have served on an IMB

The IMB Secretariat told the BBC it encourages members “to engage in the national debate on prison standards” though it cautioned “this must be a way that does not compromise their independence and draws upon evidence and experience”.

The secretariat would not comment on the “specifics” of Mrs Spear’s case saying “any questions on the termination of an IMB member should be directed to the MoJ press office as these are ministerial appointments”.

Something else happened while Mrs Spear was absent from the boardroom. Nomination forms were created for her successor and a new vice chairman.

Mrs Spear only learned of this because a fellow member broke ranks and sent a chain of emails to her.

One, from Mrs Spear’s predecessor Dr David Smith to the then vice chairman Christine Smart, concerned “nominees for board positions”.

In it, he wrote: “A delicate one, that was devised in the hope or expectation that Faith would resign.

“She has not and if she became aware that nominations had been requested, it would add fuel to the fire.”

“I suppose we could always tear up the nomination forms and pretend it never happened.”

Mr Leech, who was also sent copies of the leaked emails, said: “What we had here were people saying ‘we will just rip it up and pretend it never happened’.”

Image copyright Laurence Cawley

Image caption Joseph Spear told how his wife ceased eating properly after the board meeting revolt

The BBC approached Dr Smith and Mrs Smart about both the attempt to get Mrs Spear to stand down and the leaked emails.

Dr Smith declined to explain what he intended by his emails to fellow board members.

However, he said an investigation into the matter had concluded that those “complained about had no case to answer as the allegations against them had not been substantiated”.

Mrs Smart too said the matter had been “independently investigated and reported to the minister and a decision taken” adding: “I have nothing further to add.”

The Ministry of Justice was asked whether the nomination forms were a contravention of IMB rules and whether it felt Mrs Spear’s allegations of bullying behaviour against fellow IMB members had been properly investigated. Neither question was answered.

Both Mrs Smart and Dr Smith subsequently resigned from the IMB of Hollesley Bay.

For weeks after that fateful meeting in April, Mrs Spear continued to carry out prison visits at Hollesley Bay.

And at the May 2016 board meeting, she found herself sitting alone.

“Faith wasn’t eating properly,” says Mrs Spear’s husband of 30 years, Joseph.

“There have been some real lows. Seeing the physical and mental impact on Faith in front of me was remarkable.”

During this time, she spoke about her experience to the East Anglian Daily Times (EADT).

In June, she found she had been suspended. A letter from previous prisons minister Andrew Selous cited the EADT article – and not the Prisons Handbook piece – as grounds for the suspension .

Image copyright Getty Images

Image caption A few months after Mrs Spear was suspended, her worst fears about prisons were realised with a string of riots including at Bedford , Birmingham and Swaleside in Kent

The letter told her she was accused of “failing to treat colleagues with respect” and for “acting in a manner which could bring discredit or cause embarrassment to the IMB”.

“It was just astonishing what people had engineered against her,” says Mr Spear. “I have seen her rebound and find her feet and a place to rearticulate the issues she was concerned about.”

Independent Monitoring Boards are “part of the UK’s obligations to the United Nations for independent monitoring of prisons”, says Mr Leech.

“IMBs need to be fit for purpose. They are not. They are groomed to be quiet.”

The Ministry of Justice said: “We value the work of Independent Monitoring Boards which play a vital role in ensuring prisons are places of safety and reform.”

A few months after Mrs Spear was suspended, her worst fears were realised with a string of prison riots at places such as Bedford , Birmingham, Lewes and Swaleside in Kent.

At Bedford, 1m of damage was caused while in Birmingham stairwells were set alight and paper records destroyed during trouble on four wings of the category B prison.

The IMB Secretariat issued a statement on the riots. Its irony was not lost on Mrs Spear.

In it, Mr Thornhill claimed: “IMB members have regularly expressed great frustration that their real concerns about the state of prisons has been largely ignored over the years.”

He spoke of “serious issues” and “staff shortages”, words not too far removed from Mrs Spear’s own warnings that prisons were being “starved of resources”.

And then, in January, she was sacked as IMB chairman.

“The crisis in our prisons has never been as bad as it is now,” says Mr Leech.

“In the case of the Faith, they shot the messenger and they did not read the message.”

Photography: Laurence Cawley and Martin Barber

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