#but part of it is like i totally love bullying really nice guys. Sorry america

[firefox-official]

In as much detail as possible, what makes superman attractive in your eyes

well because hes the nicest guy in the world. Because not only is he a superhero (hot) hes also a nerdy guy with glasses and a necktie (hot) and no matter which personality he is on any given day hes still the nicest guy in the whole world. Just in a different form. plus hes really sexy. Also hes jewish

[loubrary]

Billy Hargrove x Male Reader

Headcanons: You’re new in town and help Billy become a better person.

Warnings: mentions of violence and homophobia, hints of smut.

A/N: This doesn’t really follows the ST timeline but who cares about canon or accuracy, am I right?

[ Masterlist ]

Your parents move you a lot due to their jobs, they’re always researching something in some strange corner of the world. You can’t understand how you went from living in South America for the last six months to living in middle-of-nowhere Hawkins Indiana.

You’re out to your parents, and they’re very supportive. You consider yourself lucky, they’re very modern and open-minded people.

The kids at your new school don’t know what to make of you with your different clothes, hair and accent. Some of the teachers are fascinated to learn of the places you’ve been to. 

When you met Robin your gaydars went off and you’re both excited to have a Fellow Gay in town. She introduces you to her friend Steve and the three of you become very close. Soon you are also helping Steve take care of his kids.

Billy hears of this strange new kid and goes to look for him to show him who owns this school. When Billy sees you he is enthralled, the world stops and all he sees is you, he feels a strange sensation inside, and he hates it.

In the days that follow, Billy makes his moves. He is mean to you, calls you names. He tries to intimidate you and scare you. But you’ve dealt with his type many times before and you have some tricks up your sleeve. 

Billy hates that you don’t react to his taunting. You just smile and laugh.

“F*g!”

“You too?! Wanna go on a date, darling? Bad boys with pretty hair are totally my type, Hargrove.”

His words don’t work, so he changes his tactics. 

You’re walking through an empty hallway when he attempts to grab you and slam you against the wall. Only to find himself on the floor completely immobilized. He had no clue you had trained in various martial arts. 

Putting the pain aside, Billy is turned on by the feeling of being dominated, he feels himself hardening against the cold floor. 

You lean down and whisper in his ear, “think twice before daring to touch me, pretty boy.” You let him go. 

One side of him wants to fight but when he sees the determination and fearlessness in your eyes he backs down. “This isn’t over,” he huffs and leaves stomping the floor.

Billy leaves you alone after that. He only glares at you and curses at you under his breath. He hates that he can’t stop thinking about that day. He hates that he enjoyed being under your control. He hates how he can only cum to images of you. But at this exact moment he hates seeing you with Steve laughing. 

You feel his eyes on you, how they follow you as you move. When you face him his face hardens and his fists clench, but there’s something in his eyes you can’t decipher. 

One day you’re alone in the showers, or so you think. You turn and see Billy checking you out from the other side, completely frozen. You notice his hard-on and his eyes open wide. He thinks you’ll say something but you just smile and wink at him. He leaves hurriedly trying to control himself. 

That confirms your suspicions and you know what is up with Billy. You’ve met guys with internalized homophobia, but never like Billy.

After that, teasing Billy becomes one of your favourite activities. You pay him visits at the pool, making sure he gets a nice view of you. You notice when he covers his lap with his magazine, and tries to focus on something else. 

“Why do we come to the public pool? We both have pools at home,” Steve complains. Robin laughs at the clueless boy, and proceeds to explain the situation.

One day Billy finds you alone and he attempts to make a move on you. He was so confident believing you’d accept his advances. 

“I’m not some desperate lonely gay boy, Billy. I don’t bend over for any hot guy that offers me his dick.” “So you think I’m hot?” He smirks. You scoff leaving him there.

Billy hates that you rejected him. How is it possible? He thinks of the guys he tormented and then fucked back in California, how easy they fell to their knees for him. 

Billy has never met a gay guy as confident and unafraid as you. Deep inside he feels jealous and admiration for you. He secretly wishes he could be as open and be free as you.

You get paired for a project, you are prepared to do all the work and let him take part of the credit. You’re shocked when he asks if you want to get together to work on the project. You’re even more shocked when you learn that he actually understands the material and is quite smart. 

Against your better judgement you invite him to your place. You’re surprised he shows up on time.

When he greets your parents, it’s like he’s a completely different person. He laughs at your dad’s jokes, compliments your mom, and even asks about what they are working on.

Billy is even more jealous of you when he sees how loving and caring your parents are, how happy and peaceful your home life is. 

The second time he comes over he has to excuse himself and go to the bathroom to splash some water on his face and calm down. All he can think of is everything you have that he doesn’t.

He finds you and your parents sitting tightly together as your mother reads a book out loud in french for you and your dad. 

“Sit down honey, I’ll translate for you,” your mother says. 

By the fourth day he accepts your parents’ invitation to stay for dinner. He has fun, he’s fascinated by your parents’ stories and their research work. 

You get a glimpse of the real Billy and can’t help but smile. 

One day during dinner your mother talks about your exes trying to embarrass you, and asks Billy if there’s a special boy in his life.

Billy’s breath hitches and starts to sweat. He stands up quickly bumping into the table, saying he has to leave. 

Your mom tries to apologise and your dad asks him to stay. 

You follow him outside the house. “Billy, wait!” 

He turns around to face you and his eyes are red as he tries to hold in the tears. “Hey, it’s all—“ “I’m not a... I’m not.” he grunts before getting in his car and speeding off. 

Billy parks somewhere secluded and hits the steering wheel with his fists, he cries and yells in anger. He’s angry, sad, jealous. 

He cries for his mom, for a life he wishes he had, for the love and support he yearns for. 

Billy returns the following week to finish the project. He plans to just focus on the project, finish it and never return. 

Your mom answers the door. “So good to see you, love, we’ve missed you,” she says warmly rubbing his arm, “sorry about the other day”. He almost doesn’t hear the last sentence, he hasn’t heard those words or felt that way in a long time. Someone being happy to see him, missing him, calling him love. 

Your dad greets him and calls him son, and asks him to join him later in the study to show him their latest findings. 

You and Billy don’t talk about what happened. You focus on your project.

“Have you always been out to your parents?” Billy blurts out.

You decide to be honest. “Yeah, they sort of figured it out when I was little.” You tell him how growing up you met all kinds of people through your parents. You tell him about your parents’ gay friends that you call uncles and aunts. Telling him how you always felt free to be yourself with your parents even though you know the world is cruel and unaccepting. 

After a moment of silence Billy speaks. He talks about the only openly gay person he ever met, a friend of his mom back in California. He tells you about how his father hated his mom’s friend and got in fights with his mom about it. 

He tells you about his dad, how aggressive and angry he is. He doesn’t tell you about the physical abuse. He went on about how unhappy he was, and how different your lives were. 

You start to see why Billy acts the way he does. Bullying others is his way to feel he is in control.

“How do you do it?” 

“What?” 

“Being gay like that, you don’t hide.” 

“We only live once, I’m not gonna let a world full of bigots tell me I can’t be myself and be happy.” You pause. ”Billy? You can always be yourself here.”

After you finish your project, Billy keeps coming to your place to hang out. 

He’s more relaxed and tones down the attitude. He even starts being nice to Max.

He’s still the bad boy to everyone else, but when he enters your home all that stays outside.

You learn more about the real Billy. How he likes science and music. How curious he is. How funny he can be. And you slowly start to fall for this Billy.

One day Billy and you are in the living room listening to music lying on the carpet and giggling when your mom comes in. “Honey, your friends are here.”

You both look up and see a shocked Steve and the kids, and a grinning Robin. Max is especially shocked by the whole scene.

“Oh hey guys, you know Billy, right? We’re just listening to this new album.”

Billy panics, and stands up to escape, “I have to go.” You understand, not wanting to force him into anything. 

The others sit down looking suspiciously at Billy as he leaves. Billy avoids all eye contact. “What did I get himself into?” Billy thinks. 

Meanwhile Robin and you have each other’s arm over your shoulders as you sing dramatically.

“Is anyone going to talk about how you were on the floor giggling with Billy Hargrove?” Mike asks. 

One rainy night, Billy is driving to your house. His eyes sting, his knuckles turn white gripping the wheel. He feels his cheek and eye starting to swell. He stays on the driveway debating on what to do. He sees your bedroom light on and goes to ring the bell hoping that you open the door.

It’s your mom that opens the door. “Billy? Come on in, love, you’re soaking wet.” When he steps into the lit hallway your mom finally sees his face. “Oh my god, sweetheart. What happened?” 

“Who is it darling? Oh Billy!  Are you okay, son?” Your dad asks him.

Billy wants to lie, he had this planned, he would have said how he got into a fight with another guy and didn’t want to go home looking like that. “I got—I...” he tries. But he can’t keep it in anymore. “It was... My—my dad...” he chokes as he lets out a cry. 

He feels two sets of arms engulf him, and he lets is all out. He cries like he’s never cried before. He thinks he hears your name being called. He hears your parents’ voices, encouraging and supportive words he can barely make up. He cries even more when he think of how these people that he met not long ago care more about him than his own father. 

You find your parents consoling Billy. Your mom is holding him while your dad rubs circles on his back. And Billy holds on to them like his life depends on it.“Billy?” He looks up to you and you see his broken face, all the pain and suffering he has endured and your heart breaks for him. 

You help him get up and walk him to the living room. Your dad goes to prepare the guest room and your mother prepares some tea. Billy is curled into a ball under a blanker with his head on your lap. You run your hand through his hair as you rub his arm comfortingly. 

When he calms down, he starts telling you of everything his dad has done. All the punches, the bruises, the hurtful words. 

Later you take him to the guest room, you help him get his clothes off and rub some medicine over his bruises. 

“Can you stay with me?” 

“Of course.”

You hold him close, his face pressed on your chest. 

For the first time in a long while Billy sleeps peacefully.

After that day your parents take action, they’re on the phone with their lawyers, looking at how they can help Billy and Max.

Your parents help him get custody of Max. 

The both of them move in with your family. 

“Can’t believe you’re taking me to live with your boyfriend,” Max tells him. “He’s just a friend,” he groans. “Yeah, right.”

That night Billy is in your bed as you read to him, his head on your lap. “Thank you,” he says pulling your book down to look at you. “What for?” You ask, running a hand through his hair. “For saving me, and Max.” You smile and kiss his forehead and continue with the story.

In the morning you wake up to Billy facing you, looking at you and he smiles. 

“You okay?” He nods and reaches for your hand, holding it tightly as he scoots closer to you.

You move a loose strand of hair behind his ear, caressing his cheek, feeling how soft his skin is. 

You two stay like that for a while just enjoying each other’s warmth in silence, playing with your hands and looking into other’s eyes. Neither of you can’t stop smiling. 

“I love you, (y/n).”

“I love you too, Billy.”

[erumai-maadu]

@rock-n-roll-lee here’s the nejiten oneshot you bullied out of me (jk ily and I wanted to write this for you hope you like it)

Modern AU, established relationship, fluffiest shit I’ve ever written.

word count: 1351

warnings: none

---

“Tenten? Hey, Tenten, wake up. We’re at your apartment.”

The sound of Lee’s voice pulled Tenten out of the haze of sleep. The chill of the window against her cheek reminded her that this, unfortunately, was the real world, which meant she had to get up to get back home. Opening her eyes, the harsh glare of a street lamp immediately assaulted her vision, making her squint.

She let out a little groan as she slowly sat up, her body aching. “Sorry about that,” Tenten mumbled, bending down and rummaging around for her bag. “Didn’t mean to fall asleep.” Not finding it, she reached into the back of Lee’s truck, feeling around blindly in the dark.

“No problem. After all, anyone would be tired after what you did today. You were so awesome, Tenten!”

“Aww, thanks Lee. You did really well too!” Finally finding the strap of her bag, Tenten hauled it into her lap, wincing as her muscles protested the exertion. “Kami, I’m gonna be so sore tomorrow. I’m gonna have to skip out on our daily run.”

“I do not blame you. I think I’ll do the same, honestly.”

“Yeah, I get that.” She smirked at him. “Gives you an excuse to spend some quality time with Gaara in the morning.”

Lee flushed bright red at her implication and sputtered a bit before regaining control of himself. “Speaking of significant others, Neji comes back from his trip in a month, right?”

Tenten sighed, mood immediately soured. “Yeah, but he hasn’t texted in days.”

“What?” Lee demanded. “He hasn’t texted? That is very unlike him! You should call him and inquire what the matter is.”

“Tried that. Went straight to voicemail.”

“Seriously?” When she nodded, Lee yanked his phone out. “I’ll call him right now. If he picks up, he’s in for it.”

“Don’t bother.” Tenten waved her hand dismissively. “I’m too tired for this shit. I’ll try Hinata’s phone tomorrow.”

Lee’s eyes were filled with concern. “Are you sure, Tenten?”

“Yeah. It’s okay, Lee.” She smiled at him. “We know Neji. He’s probably just busy with some job that Hiashi-san gave him. Honestly, I’m pretty sure he’s trying to work Neji to death so he doesn’t have to hand the company over to him.”

Lee nodded, concern still etched into his expression. “I suppose. Let me know if you need anything at all, Tenten.”

“Thanks, Lee.” She opened the van door and stepped out, shielding her eyes from the brightness of the streetlamp. “Have a good night.” The door slammed shut, the noise echoing through the empty street in the dead of night.

“You too, Tenten. Don’t forget to stretch and get a good night’s rest. You earned it.” Lee shot her his signature Nice Guy Grin. “Congratulations on winning gold.”

They waved goodbye and Lee drove away as Tenten scanned her key card to get into the apartment complex. She painstakingly made her way up three flights of stairs and finally reached her door after what seemed like ten years. Fumbling with her keys, it took her three attempts before she managed to unlock her door and step inside. 

In a haze of exhaustion, she removed her shoes and dumped her bag somewhere on the ground, the medal inside making a loud clank as it hit the ground. Shuffling into her bedroom, she flopped down on her bed and let out a sigh of contentment, already half-asleep.

“Tenten.” A deep male voice came from behind her, startling her awake. Who the hell was in her apartment? Shooting up, she looked for the source of the voice and found her gaze locking with a pair of lavender eyes. The breath rushed out of her.

“Neji,” she breathed, not daring to believe this was real. “What are you doing here? Aren’t you in America? You’re not supposed to be back for another month.”

“I asked Hiashi-sama for early leave. I missed you so much.” He smiled, stepping closer. “I also wanted to watch your tournament, but my flight was delayed. I got here about ten minutes before you did.”

“Is that why you haven’t texted for the past few days?”

He nodded. “It was a hassle, trying to get Hiashi-sama to approve my absence, and then he tried to shove as much work as he could at me before I left. I’m sorry about that.”

“Don’t be. I totally get it.”

“I’m going to take a shower.” He took another step forward and slipped his hand into hers, squeezing once. “Join me?”

“Neji I don’t have the energy for—”

“Not like that. We’re both too tired for that.” He let out a warm little laugh and squeezed her hand again. “Just getting clean. Then we sleep.”

“Okay.” She allowed him to pull her up and out of bed.

A short shower later, they dressed and dried their hair, Neji gently removing the tangles from the rat’s nest she called hair in a way only he could do.

(“Don’t call it that!” he admonished. “Your hair is beautiful, just like the rest of you.” He pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her neck.)

Neji’s hair, of course, was smooth and silky with minimal tangles, even after two days of airplane travel because the universe was unfair like that.

“Frickin’ Hyuuga and their magical hair.”

“Magical hair?” Neji asked, his voice full of amusement.

“Two days of airplane travel and like three minor tangles? That’s the definition of magical hair.” She ran the comb through, marveling at the easy slide. “You’re like Rapunzel or something.”

“Does that make you my prince then?”

“Obviously. I’ll ride in looking all dashing and handsome and save you from the tower and take you on a wild adventure.” She yawned, exhaustion crashing like a wave over her. “Well, maybe we can go on a wild adventure tomorrow. For now, I need to sleep.” She stood up with a sigh and took a step in the direction of the bedroom, but Neji hadn’t moved an inch. Turning back to him, she frowned. “Neji?”

“In a way,” he started slowly, “I suppose you did save me from a tower.”

She stared at him for a moment. When his meaning finally became clear, she let out a soft huff of laughter. “Huh. Well, I suppose I did.” She walked over to him and pulled him up, planting a small kiss on his mouth that was more smile than kiss, in all honesty. “You’re such a dork, Neji.”

Neji laughed and stood up, gently tugging her in the direction of their bedroom. She gladly followed him, throwing herself on the bed and snuggling under the covers as quickly as she could. Neji switched off the lights and slipped in next to her, wrapping his arms around her and drawing her to him once again.

“I’m glad you’re back.” She shifted even closer to him, letting her forehead rest on his neck. He smelled like lavender, from her soap. The scent reminded her of the color of his eyes, which was part of the reason she preferred that soap in the first place.

(She’d been using lavender-scented soap since middle school, but he didn’t need to know that.)

“It’s good to be home. I heard you won gold in the competition?”

“Yeah, I did. It was super hard, though. Remember Karui? The girl from Kumo? I fought her in the finals. I just barely won.” She was probably slurring her words, but she couldn’t bring herself to care.

“Ah. No wonder you were so tired when you got home. Lee dropped you off, didn’t he? I saw his truck outside.”

“Yeah. That green hunk of junk is hard to miss,” she grumbled.

He laughed, the pleasant vibration of his chest lulling Tenten further to sleep. “It certainly suits him, I suppose. It matches his jumpsuit too.”

“Mmh. It does.”

Neji let out another soft laugh and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. “Ah, sorry for talking so much. Go to sleep, my love. We will talk more in the morning.”

“G’night. Love you.”

“I love you too, Tenten.”

[translightyagami]

Hi! If you're not too busy, could you write headcanons about Soichiro being super-supportive of Light and/or Sayu being trans/lgbt please? I need something to cheer me up

Hello! I think i’ve written about this before but being a really unruly tag-er of posts, I don’t think i can find them posts easily. so i’ll try to make some fresh headcanons nonny.

i think this depends on how you see the yagami sibs - their identities n such. i imagine they both end up tumbling into adulthood as trans and gay, albeit in different ways. Sayu comes around to a genderqueer lesbian understanding of herself and dates a LOT of anti-cap art students that Soichiro doesn’t like at all. he tells himself he dislikes how disrespectful her partners are, that they don’t have her best interests at heart, but the truth is that Soichiro can sense how Sayu is looking for a way to be Someone when she’s only been seen as a part, a piece. He fumbles everyone’s pronouns but gets it right on the third try, and Sayu always asks what he thinks of her choices. Soichiro is too honest for his own good but the fights don’t last super long. And even as all the different flags she’s worn collect on his desk - each one a token from a different Pride parade - he knows she’ll be okay; Sayu has never had trouble thinking for herself, and making her own path.

He’s a little worried about Light. His son, who transitioned when he was 14 and who never stopped being Soichiro’s shadow, even when he gained those last few inches on his dad. His son who won’t stop dating men Sayu uncharitably (but, Soichiro privately thinks, correctly) calls weasels. Oh sure, this revolving door of well-payed, nice-enough lovers that Light faithfully brings to dinner twice and then never again - they aren’t a threat to Soichiro’s son. Few things in the world are a threat to him, which is why Soichiro worries about those few things. He supported Light when he had top surgery, went with him to the clinic for testosterone (altho, a bit of needlephobe himself, Soichiro let his wife handle the actual shot), and got Light his job at the NPA with not a small amount of pressure to the higher-ups. Light’s happiness is important to him ... but he wishes Light would care a little more about his happiness too. Instead, Light does what he’s supposed to do - date nice but pliable men, bring them home, and remains effectively single.

“Light,” Sochiro corners him during a work lunch. “I want you to be happy. I want you to meet someone nice.”

“Ah, Dad,” Light laughs. “That’s not for me. I don’t think I’m supposed to be with anyone.” He gets quiet, twiddling his thumbs. “I have other things to do. Important things.”

Sayu graduates colleges and announces she’s moving to America. The whole family is in uproar, in a good way, and they see her off at the airport. Soichiro follows her Twitter updates, sees her meeting new people and getting into social activism. She tells her parents she’s seeing a therapist and she misses them.

“How’s Light?” she asks and Soichiro hesitates.

“He should visit you, I think,” he says.

Light is doing fine. He’s been fine for years. Now working in a higher position and living on his own, he doesn’t bring home boyfriends anymore. His passion is burnt, Soichiro can tell, and he starts asking more and more for advice - something Light never used to do. And Soichiro doesn’t know what to say: what Light needs help with is something Soichiro never had to deal with. His own life was, comparatively, easy - he met Sachiko in college. He married her. They had children. Light can have those things, sure, but it will be different and Light’s never been great at being different. So Soichiro tells Light to keep going forward - he just doesn’t know what else to say.

Sayu meets her future wife at a reproductive rights rally and brings her home after several Facetime calls that were really just gushing about how much she loves her. Sachiko and Soichiro love her too; she’s a little older than Sayu, a trans woman who has a steady job running a bookstore and pink streaks in her hair. She calls Sayu babe, and asks Sachiko for recipes. Sochiro knows she’s uneasy around him at first, but warms when he asks her questions about softball (Sayu played it in college, and Soichiro always found it more fun than Light’s short-lived tennis days). Light is courteous toward her, but he never seems fully present during the meeting. He keeps taking calls and returning to the dinner table a little red-faced.

“It’s classified,” he tells Soichiro, who asks the caller’s name. “I can’t say. But it’s someone safe, I promise.”

Light and Sayu’s future-wife go to bed early, both staying over in the house, so Soichiro sits with Sayu getting some father-kid time in. He can’t help but get her perspective on Light’s behavior. She laughs when he asks.

“Oh c’mon Dad,” Sayu says. “Light’s totally talking to a guy he likes. That’s how he always has been with crushes.”

“What?” Soichiro is shocked. “But ... I’ve never seen Light have a crush.”

“Oh yeah, okay.” Nodding, Sayu taps her chin. “You were kinda MIA at the time with the Kira case. Light used to get all blush-y and red back then when he got calls or visits from this college friend he had. I tried to spy on them once, but you know Light. He’s so good at swattin’ down spy stuff.” She scratches her head. “What was that guy’s name? It was like that actor’s name, wasn’t it? Anyway, Light would go totally dreamy after talking to him, all in his own head. Never seen him be like that around anyone else.”

Soichiro’s mouth gets tight. “Was his name Hideki Ryuga?”

“Huh? Oh yeah!” Sayu slaps her knee. “Oh my god, I used to like that actor soo much. Although that guy didn’t look like him at all.”

“Yes. I remember.”

Soichiro digs through his drawers that night while Sachiko tells him to keep it down while they have guests. But he needs to find a very specific number that he was told to use for emergencies only. He finds it taped under his bottom drawer and dials it on the kitchen phone. There’s a long period of hold music before anyone answers; its not that bad a tune.

“There’s no reason for you to call this number,” L says when he picks up. “I’m hanging up now and destroying this line. What a waste.”

“Do you have feelings for my son?”

There’s a crackle that makes Soichiro think L hung up but chewing noises revive him. L is just eating candy.

“Why do you ask?” L still sounds the same, yet there’s wrinkles in his voice that make him sound almost ... well Soichiro wants to say mature, although the candy ruins that a bit. “I need to hang up.”

“If you have feelings for him,” Soichiro bullies through, “then you need to tell him. Light deserves to be happy and I think you make him happy.”

“Hm.”

“He’s a very special person.” Soichiro has water in his voice. “I don’t think he wants to be, but he is. And if he chooses you, then you would have no better choice in the world than him.”

“Mm.” L rolls the syllables around. “I’m hanging up now. This number will not work again. Good bye.”

Soichiro stands in the kitchen for a minute listening to the dial tone before a scuffle catches his attention. Light steps away from a spilled glass of water, eyes gleaming and wide, as Soichiro hangs up the phone.

“I’m sorry.” Light grabs a towel, his voice wavering and his head turned down. “Sorry, I was getting a glass of water.”

“I meant it.” Soichiro gets on his knees and holds his son’s hands. They’re not as small as when Light was a child but they fell the same - warm, smooth, full of grace even when flexing nervously. “You are special. And you’ll find someone who thinks that someday.”

They hug, briefly, but Light’s phone disrupts them with a loud ringing. Hesitating before he takes it out, Light looks at his dad and his eyes are filled with hope - Soichiro thinks its a nice, new look for Light.

“Sorry,” Light says, “I have to take this. It’s classified.”

Three years later, and Soichiro is worried about his kids - they are both having weddings during the same week. “It’s easier!” Sayu says, because she doesn’t want to fly out twice. “We’re not doing anything big anyway,” Light says, because he and L have almost no guests invited beyond family members. But Soichiro isn’t worried so much about money or flights or anything like that. He’s worried about how it will feel, to see his children going off into the world to make their own families, to be so happy, to see them survive and thrive. And maybe he’s worried for himself, more than the kids. After all, how will it feel to be a man who got everything he ever wanted?

[rottmntrulesall]

A Serving of Tea With a Side of Feelings

Hiroki always loved the pretend tea ceremonies she and Yosh- Splinter used to do back in their childhood. It was one of the very few good memories they had. And introducing her nephew to this practice was even more exciting.

Mikey was rocking slightly as he sat on the floor, clearly excited. Splinter, meanwhile was gathering the supplies and items needed for the ceremony.

"Back in historical times, Michelangelo, tea ceremonies were a ceremonial way of preparing and drinking green tea typically in a traditional tearoom with tatami floor." Hiroki chirped happily, "Beyond just serving and receiving tea, one of the main purposes of the tea ceremony is for the guests to enjoy the hospitality of the host in an atmosphere distinct from the fast pace of everyday life. The ceremony itself was called (茶道, sadō or chadō, "the way of tea" or 茶の湯, chanoyu),' she stated writing out the symbol so her reptilian nephew would have a better grasp of what she meant. "Nowadays, the tea ceremony is practiced as a hobby, and there are places where tourists can experience it, as well."

"That all sounds so nice," Mikey smiled, nodding a bit at her explanation. If tea ceremonies were just as much about relaxing and being social as they were about making and drinking tea, it was no wonder so many people enjoyed them. Watching his aunt carefully as she wrote out the symbol, he tried to study her brush strokes so he could try and write it out himself later. "I'm really gonna have to learn more Japanese," he told her, "the way you guys write is just so pretty-" he stopped, wincing a bit at how childish he probably sounded, hoping it didn't sound like he was mocking his aunt's native language. 

"Aw, Thank you! It takes practice but it's very much worth it in the end! You're an artist, so I know you'll catch on to it fast!" Hiroki smiled. It was so nice to see the younger generation get in touch with their roots. Mikey smiled again, beaming at the compliment. He then heard his father chuckle as he set a plate down in front of them. "Another good thing about tea ceremonies? The tasty cakes you get to eat with them!" Splinter grinned, "Unfortunately, we don't have traditional tea cakes, but I figured cut up snack cakes would work just as well." 

"It's still lovely. Reminds me of the many ceremonies we had as children." Hiroki sighed. Yosh-Splinter was the only one who was willing to participate in them with her. Saki thought her ceremonies were "Stupid, pointless nonsense' and she should be more focused on training. Nori was too much of a tomboy for it. Kenji just found them kind of boring, but he was nice about it at least. Mei would rather talk about summoning dead things. *shudder*

Splinter's smile softened. "I remember those as well... They were always pretty fun, I'm not sure why no one else enjoyed them. Who could say no to a good cup of tea and some cake? Though, spending time with my little sister was always nice too."

"Well, it's their loss. They probably would've spoiled the fun anyway. You were always the fun one, Yosh-Splinter. Hikari...he tried. But, it just wasn't his cup of tea....pun sort of intended." Mikey chuckled at his aunt's joke. "Well, I'm sure it'll be my cup of tea!" he told them, lifting up his empty cup, "What do we do first?" 

"Well, a full, formal tea ceremony is a multi-hour event that starts with a kaiseki course meal, is followed by a bowl of thick tea and ends with a bowl of thin tea." Mikey blinked. "...Cool. So, we should start with preparing the meal then?" Hiroki smiled sheepishly, "Well, Kaiseki meals have a prescribed order to their dishes, most of which are prepared by using one of the common techniques of Japanese cooking. However, kaiseki chefs have considerable freedom to add, omit or substitute courses in order to highlight regional and seasonal delicacies and personal style. I don't think we have the ingredients for it here. Unless I could get it now if you wish." 

"Mm, nah." Mikey wouldn't want her running errands when they were supposed to be having tea. "Maybe we could use substitutions? Like, have a NYC version of a kaiseki meal so you don't have to go all over the city for ingredients?" "OOH, that would quite unique! Let's see what we can whip up in the kitchen! I'll tell you ALL the traditional dishes we would have while your father finishes setting up!” Mikey grinned. "Sounds good to me!" Splinter chuckled again, patting his boy's shell as he got up and followed his aunt towards the kitchen.

"You three seem to be having a good time..."

"Hm?" Splinter's ear twitched a bit as he turned towards the voice. Hikari slowly stepped out of the shadows of one of the sewer tunnels. “Mikey is really getting into Hiroki’s tea parties.” Splinter's face lit up. "Oh, Hikari, it is you! Would you like to join us? I'm sure Mikey would not mind the extra company, nor would we." Hikari shook his head. “No thank you. You know I could never really get into the flow of these ceremonies. Besides this was more of a you and Hiroki thing. I always preferred just exploring the forest or pranking Saki with you instead.” Hikari said softly. 

"Oh... Well, uh, there's a forest just outside the city. We could go there after the ceremony if you'd like," Splinter told him, "We actually have a friend who lives there. He is a bit strange but he makes really great lemonade." 

"Oh uh...is he a mutant by any chance?", Hikari asked nervously. They've been to New York a few times now but Hikari still hasn't gotten over the fact that mutants and yokai were real.

"...Yessss," Splinter replied slowly, "But he's a capybara so, super chill. And uh, he has a bunch of normal, non-mutant puppies too, so..." 

Hikari shrunk back a little at that, "Perhaps another time then. I probably would be a nuisance to you....like I always was." The last part he muttered to himself. Splinter blinked, his rat hearing still picking up on that last bit. "What do you mean?" Hikari glanced at his older brother, "I was a pest, a total pain that drove you away. That's...that's why you left us...left me." 

"What?" Splinter's ears folded down, his eyes sad now. "No- No, Hikari, that is- I never considered you a pest, and you had nothing to do with me leaving." 

Hikari's eyes widened, "I wasn't? but...Saki said...you hated us...and that I was one of the main reasons you ran away. I was always clinging to you and following you, like a second shadow. And that life in America was better than hanging around me for a second longer." Remembering those horrible words their eldest spewed at him when Hikari had asked for the umpteenth time where Yoshi was and when was he coming back.

Splinter scowled. Damn it Saki... it was bad enough his oldest brother was a bully and a pain, only caring about honor and tradition, but did he have to drag Splinter's name through the mud too?

 "Hikari... It broke my heart to leave all of you behind. ...Well, all except Saki. But I had to leave - not because I was tired of you or annoyed by you but... because I couldn't be the Hamato Clan Warrior that Father wanted me to be." He scowled to himself. "I couldn't take the training, or the discipline... I could not take the pressure, or the pain of continuing to hide my true self."

Hikari's lip trembled as tears slowly formed in his eyes. "I had no idea, I didn't. I didn't know you were suffering so much. But why didn't you take me with you? You know I would follow you anywhere. We could've started over here together." Hikari lowered his head, "Instead we didn't hear from you in years until recently. Nori tried telling me you were off doing something important, but I had my doubts."

"Otōto..." Splinter stood up, walking towards his younger brother to hug him. As much as he had tried to ignore it, he had always known how much his leaving had hurt his siblings, but he hadn't known by how much until now. "I'm so sorry, Hikari... I would have taken you if I could have."

Wiping his tears away, Hikari hesitantly placed his arms around his Aniki. "Then why didn't you? Did someone stop you, was it too dangerous?"

"Heh..." He smiled sadly. "...Did Kenji ever tell you about the night I left?"

The second-youngest Hamato shook his head, "No, every time I asked him about your whereabouts. He just changed the subject."

"...The night I left... it was Kenji who helped me escape," Splinter told him, motioning for Hikari to sit down, "I had been locked in my room for a while at that point, barely been given anything to eat or drink. Father was trying to get me to break and submit to the Hamato way, to 'stop my foolishness' as it were... It was the middle of the night when Kenji woke me up, practically dragging me out of my room and off to the train station." Splinter blinked away a couple tears as he smiled softly at that memory. "If not for him... I do not know how long I would have been able to hold on. It was Kenji that told me to leave, while I still could. I did not want to abandon you all... but I also understood that it was my only shot - that it would not be as easy to escape a second time, and that Father would only be harsher as the years went on. So, I followed Kenji's advice. and I left."

Hikari didn't know how to react to that. He knew their father was an intense man, he himself had some rather scarring memories he would rather not bring up. But was Spli-Yoshi really put through such hell? And Ken Nii-San actually disobeyed their father to set him free?? His second older brother was always the keep the peace guy.

"Aniki...I'm sorry...I know how harsh Father could be...but I didn't know he would go THAT far. Nor did I think KENJI would do something so daring. He really saved you." 

Splinter nodded. “He did... and as much as I missed you, my little brother, I could not afford having Father finding out where I was and sending Saki or one of the clan members after me. ...and, for what it is worth, while I would have loved to have you with me, it was probably better that you weren’t. I was in a new country, a new language, people who didn’t look or speak like me. Also, you don’t just become a big movie star overnight, after all. I had a couple of rough years trying to find roles and only getting bit parts.” It was a wonder he didn’t starve during that time, honestly.

"We probably would've been separated...or worse.” Hikari said. Everything finally made sense but that didn't mean the pain was gone.

Knowing this, Splinter hugged him again. “I am still sorry that I wasn’t able to see you grow up... or that I wasn’t able to properly say goodbye.”

Hikari hugged him back tight. "Aniki...I wish I was able to help you, I didn't realize you were in so much pain. I'm just happy that we're together again now."

"I am too, my brother, and please believe me that I want to spend as much time with you and our siblings as possible while you are all here with me. Both I and my sons do." 

Wiping the remaining tears and snot (ew) from his face, Hikari started to smile. 

"Is that offer to visit your capybara friend still open?"

"Of course," Splinter smiled, "We can do whatever you want."

"GET READY FOR THE FINEST CUISINE NEW YORK HAS TO OFF-" Hiroki sang as she and Mikey left the kitchen. Immediately noticing her twin and their older brother practically bear-hugging each other. And the slightly red eyes Hikari had. Hiroki immediately passed the platter of food to her nephew and rushed to her brothers' side.

"Hikari!? What's wrong? Why are you crying?? What happened, Nii-san?" Splinter took his sister's hand, patting it to try and calm her. "Hey, hey. It is alright, Hiroki. Everything's fine! We were just, ah, having a bit of an emotional moment." ‘More like a conversation that was long overdue.’ 

"Yes Hiro Nee-chan, nothing to worry about now.” Hikari sniffed, a relaxed smile appearing on his face. "Nothing at all." For the first in a long time, he finally felt at peace. 'I was actually wondering if I could join your little tea ceremony. I hear you're quite the chef, Michelangelo."

Splinter's smile grew at that, his own eyes getting a bit teary. "Wait, really? Well of course you can join us!" Setting his own plates down, Mikey joined in on the group hug. "And heh, yeah, I am sorta the family cook. Auntie Hikori was just teaching me how to make a traditional tea ceremony meal, and I was showing her how to add a bit of razz-ma-tazz to it." 

"Razz...Tazz? That sounds...unique. Let me try this tazz." Hikari said letting go of his family and reaching for a piece on the platter.

Hiroki beamed and squealed, "I never thought you'd want to take part in my tea ceremonies, Hikari! What a pleasant surprise! But I still want to know what the tears were for from the two of you." She said giving Splinter a look.

Mikey giggled. "Help yourself!" he told his uncle, hoping he'd enjoy it. "I will tell you later," Splinter assured Hiroki. If Saki had told his little brother such things, who knows what he told his sister. Hiroki finally looked reassured and started to set everything out. "Now! Traditionally, we start off with bite-sized appetizers and a small glass of alcohol." She pulled out some apple juice instead.

“Since Michelangelo is underage, we'll stick to juice." 

"Will you please present the appetizers, dear nephew?"

Mikey saluted before getting the plate, bowing slightly as he presented it to his father and uncle. Splinter sniffed it. "Mmm, smells yummy!"

"This is absolutely wonderful, Michelangelo. You really are gifted!" Hikari smiled. He wished for more moments like this. Just relaxing, chatting, and bonding with his family. They may not have had a great beginning, but he hopes that in later times they'll create happier memories to look back on. As the group of four dined and talked, Hikari sat closer to his beloved older brother.

Mikey beamed. If not for the plate he would have hugged his uncle again. "Thanks Uncle Hikari, and there's more where that came from! There's still a whole lot more where that came from!" They had a whole meal to enjoy, after all. Taking a sip of his apple juice, Mikey hummed and leaned a bit towards his pop. "You knowww, I am a mutant turtle, which means I don't HAVE to follow the law since I can't really get arrested, given that human cops don't even know I exist. So, if I WERE to have a bit of alcohol-"

 "Mikeyyyy," Splinter said, giving his son a bit of a look, making his answer to the unasked question quite clear. The box turtle sighed. "Worth a shot." 

 "Why are you so interested in drinking anyway?" 

 "Rupert Swaggart uses alcohol in his cooking all the time! Plus I'm curious about the taste. I mean, it has to be pretty good if people drink it all the time.”

The twins stared at Mikey in confusion. “Rupert Swaggart? Isn't he that gross fat pig thing you boys were fighting the other day?" Hikari asked. "I bet he tastes delicious." Hiroki chimed.

END

This was an RP I did with @fanfic-inator795. Big Thanks for the help, friend!

[angellightwood-bane-blog]

What Lurks In The Dark // Alec Lightwood X OC

Disclaimer - One - Two - Three - Four - Five - Six

Chapter Seven - Awake

Simon and Jace stumbled forward, Alec shouting for help and Isabelle ran off to find a medic. I was at the point of gasping for air and my head pounded like nothing I'd ever felt before, pleading for oxygen.

"Over here! Put her over here!" A voice I didn't recognise - or couldn't identify in my state - called. I felt myself being dragged forward before being laid down on a cold table. I felt hands pressing different areas of my chest while a new wave of blood sprayed from my mouth.

"She has a punctured lung caused by on of four broken ribs, her lungs are flooded, possible skull fracture and internal bleeding. We need to operate before her healing runes can be used effectively - now!" The world seemed to move around me and faces jumped in and out of my vision as the table I was on was wheeled down the corridor. Jace, Clary, Isabelle, Alec, Simon, Clary, Isabelle, Jace, Simon, Alec. Everybody was talking to me, but I could no longer hear the words coming from their moving mouths. The last thing I saw was the bright white ceiling of the operating room before everything fell into darkness.

I could feel weight on one side of the bed I was in. Realising someone was holding my hand and I felt my fingers twitch.

"Bre? Breeanna? Can you hear me?" I squeezed the hand that I was holding to tell them yes.

"Come on, come on open your eyes." At first the light was so overwhelming to my senses that I couldn't make out anything. After blinking a few times, I could distinguish colours and shapes and I realised that there was a head of blonde hair, looking down at me.

"Jace?" My voice came out cracked and my words were slurred but the head started to nod and after a few more seconds of blurry vision, Jace's face became clear.

"What are you doing here?"

"Waiting for you to wake up obviously," He rolled his eyes, but I could see his smile was gentle and he was genuinely worried.

"Dude what happened?" I asked, trying to wiggle my way up. Jace helped me into a sitting position before he replied.

"You saved Alec's life," He whispered,

"And nearly died."

"Is Alec okay?" I asked, looking down at my hands. Jace let out a strained laugh,

"I tell you that you nearly just died and you're asking if he's okay? My God." He looked down at me realising I was still looking at him expectantly and he cleared his throat,

"Yes, he's okay," He assured me.

"And Clary? Isabelle? What about Simon? Is he okay?"

"Yes- yes- they're all fine calm down," Jace said, holding his hands up.

"And you?" he nodded again. I let out a sigh and fell back against my pillows, remembering what I had been meaning to talk to him about.

"I know that my mom was part of the Circle, and I know they killed your father, and I just wanted you to know that I'm sorry for that." He offered me a small smile and squeezed my hand,

"You really are something else you know that?" he chuckled. putting a more serious look on he said,

"You had me so worried, I thought we were going to lose you."

"Why? Don't you care that I'm the daughter of the enemy?" I asked half-heartedly.

"Not at all, Bre you're my little sister now." I grinned,

"Yeah because you love Clary," I teased. He snorted, but looked me in the eye again,

"and if you're talking about Alec... he doesn't really think that. He was really worried-”

“Because he feels guilty is all, he would rather be rid of me and Clary," I mumbled. Jace sighed,

"That's not true Bre, you should have seen him, he was a wreck." I couldn't bring myself to believe him and so just shook my head, finding arguing futile.

"Just... all that matters is that everyone is okay, you're sure that you’re not sugar-coating anything? Izzy, my sister, Simon," Jace was nodding along,

"...Alec? They're really okay?"

"I'm okay." I snapped my head to the direction of the voice so fast that I may as well have given myself whiplash. Alec was leaning against my doorframe, arms folded. He gestured forward,

"Can I come in?" I shrugged, and he took it as a yes, walking over to me. Jace shot me a look that said he cares, be nice, before getting up, allowing Alec to take his place on my bed. Jace walked out the door and the room fell silent for a few seconds. I tried to avoid Alec's gaze, but it was very difficult.

"Breeanna, I'm so sorry," Alec's voice cracked a little and I made eye contact with him for the first time since I'd snapped at him in the tunnel.

"I never meant for any of this," he waved his hand over my body,

"to happen."

"If you're only here because you feel guilty, then you can go," I said quietly, looking down at my fidgeting hands. Alec placed a hand over both of mine, bringing my attention back up to him.

"Of course, I feel guilty, you almost lost your life trying to save mine. After everything I said about you, accused you of, I know you overheard Jace and I talking, even then, you still risked yourself for me. Breeanna, when I thought you were going to die, I didn't think I would be able to live with myself, knowing what you did in spite of the way I treated you. Of course, I don't think you're working with Valentine, you couldn't possibly be. I'm so, so sorry," Alec sounded so genuine. Hesitantly, he wrapped his hand around mine, taking hold of it. I let him.

"It's okay," I whispered, my voice still scratchy.

"No, it's not," he replied, hanging his head with shame,

"But still, I'm sorry."

"Alec." He didn't look up.

"Hey," I brought his hand up, wrapping both my small ones around it, holding it to my chest. Alec looked up, into my eyes and I whispered,

"I forgive you, but you need to forgive yourself too. You were just protecting your family and I can't hold that against you. I'll be fine, so you can't dwell on this." Alec looked as if he didn't know whether to smile or cry.

"What did we do to deserve someone like you, Breeanna?" He gently pulled me forward into a tight hug, and I sighed into his shoulder, rubbing his back,

"What are we going to do with ourselves hey?"

"Alec, Jace told me to come and get you, he thinks he has a lead on the Mortal Cup," Isabelle raced into the room. Alec slowly pulled away from me and looked at Isabelle who now wore wide eyes and an apologetic look. Alec looked back at me and I nodded indicating that he should go. He quietly whispered,

"Thank you," kissed the top of my head and left, with a very confused Isabelle following. I decided that I couldn't lie around in bed all day and so I got dressed into some fresh clothes and shakily made my way downstairs. I was certainly feeling better; I was just a little sore - as was expected after nearly dying and all. I caught Clary and Simon on the stairs down to the op centre.

"...Can't keep me prisoner here," Simon was saying.

"Prisoner? Wait, what Simon! Where are you going?" Clary grabbed his arm.

"I'm going home, Clary, and if you haven't already completely drunk their Kool-Aid, then you're coming with me," Simon replied.

"You know I can't," Clary said.

"Yes, you can, it's not safe here," he insisted. Jace stepped out of the elevator in the entrance hall and blocked the doorway with his arms crossed.

"In fact, this is the safest place she could possibly be." Simon was having none of it though, pointing a finger at Jace,

"You don't get to talk to me, Captain America."

"Considering I'm the guy with the weapons, I pretty much get to say what I want."

"Okay, come at me, bro!" Simon took a step towards him.

"Oh, yeah?" Jace snorted.

"Yeah!" Simon made for Jace, but Clary got in front of him, pushing him back.

"Hey, what is your problem?" She demanded.

"He's my problem!" He pointed at Jace again,

"He's just like Kirk Duplesse from high school. Do you remember him? Total jerk with the square jaw, smelled like body spray, always bullying people." He looked at Jace over Clary's shoulder and shouted,

"Why don't you do your own homework? Just once, yeah?" Then to Clary he added through gritted teeth,

"I can take care of myself." Simon walked around both Clary and Jace, heading straight for the door. Clary turned to look expectantly at Jace who furrowed his eyebrows,

"I'm not saving his ass a second time." Clary ran after Simon, and Jace caught sight of me on the stairs. He jogged over,

"Woah there, you should be in bed." I waved him off,

"I'm fine, operated on and rune-healed. Isabelle said you have a lead on the Mortal Cup?" Jace nodded and walked me over to a table in front of one of many large screens. Alec and Isabelle were already there, and Alec raised an eyebrow at me as if asking whether I should be out of bed, and I just shrugged in return, offering a sheepish grin. Clary joined us with a disheartened look on her face,

"Simon's gone."

"But Bre is back, she's fine by the way," Alec snapped, Clary look startled and looked to me to defend her, but I shrugged again and turned to the screen.

"So, Magnus Bane?" I asked. Hodge started the run down, flicking through some pictures on the screen,

"He's over 300 years old and, as you can see, he's not exactly shied away from the pleasures of every century. His tastes are both exquisite and quite excessive. Now, Magnus is one of the most powerful warlocks I've ever known. He has a deep mistrust of Shadowhunters."

"Well, then why did he help my mom remove my memories? Isn't she a Shadowhunter?" Clary asked.

"Bree’s memories too," Jace added, giving Clary a pointed look.

"Yes, one of the best - but help might not be the most accurate word," Hodge answered.

"Now, did Magnus provide a service for Jocelyn? Perhaps. But more than likely, your mother paid Magnus handsomely for his magic." Jace added,

"Warlocks usually require payment before they help anyone with anything."

"Word from the Clave is that most of the warlocks have gone into hiding since Valentine began hunting them," Alec informed the group.

"Valentine must be searching for the warlock, who aided Jocelyn-" Hodge seemed to choke and inhaled deeply through the pain of his burning rune.

"So how do we find Magnus?" Clary asked, ignoring the man in pain in front of her.

“Hodge!” I placed a hand on his arm, silently asking if he was ok.

"We don't. Magnus finds us. We'll set up a meeting, somewhere protected. Lure him out of hiding," Jace replied while I continued to rub Hodge's arm. He shot me a grateful smile just as Isabelle added to Jace's response with a smirk.

"And I know exactly where we do it."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm late, I know

Hope you enjoy my Lovelies.

-Angel

[ckerouac]

fic: other duties as assigned

Title: Other Duties as Assigned  (AO3)

Fandom: MCU

Summary:  Peter wasn’t sure how exactly he ended up playing errand boy for the Black Widow in a department store downtown while she bullied Captain America into a new wardrobe, but if that's where the friendly neighborhood Spider-Man was needed, he wasn't going to leave his SPIDER BRO hanging.

Notes: This is all @slayediest fault - the prompt was ‘anyone takes Steve shopping for new clothes’ and, well, this happened.

Peter wasn’t sure how exactly he ended up playing errand boy for the Black Widow in a department store downtown.  One minute he was working on a chemistry lab report with Ned, and then next he was getting a flurry of texts from Mr. Stark about an ‘intervention’ and ‘secret mission’ and ‘if it’s too much for you you can say no’.  Which, of course he wasn’t going to say no! He was an Avenger! Well, sort of… mostly… close enough. Technically.

And then there was a text from the Black Widow asking politely if he’d be willing to help out a fellow spider because there was someone in terrible need.  

HE WAS GOING TO BE SPIDER BROS WITH THE BLACK WIDOW.

Ned promised to keep the app open in his phone that they’d linked to KAREN just in case Peter needed his guy in the chair, because if it was something that Natasha Romanoff was asking for help with, it had to be something serious. Life threatening.  Maybe there were more aliens. Or an accident at a chemical plant. Or a nuclear bomb.  Or a mass arrest of guys on Wall Street because it turns out they were linked to HYDRA and that’s why they were trying to bring down American democracy.  MJ talked about that lot, so that would totally be something that the Black Widow would be involved in. He wasn’t sure what he could do to help with that, but he could web up bad guys with the best of them and if they needed him, it didn’t matter what it was.  He was going to be there!

“I just think the blue looks better,” Natasha said, reaching over to pull the navy blue t-shirt from the pile on Peter’s lap to hand to Steve.  “It brings out the blue of your eyes.”

“Is that really a thing?” Steve asked, taking the shirt and looking for all intents and purposes like a defeated man as he stood in the doorway of the dressing room.  

Natasha gave him a light squeeze of the shoulder.  “I get that you’ve been out of the dating game for a while, but trust me.  It’s a thing.”

“I’m not trying to get back into the dating game,” Steve replied.  But he took the shirt, along with the pile of jeans Natasha had already handed him and retreated back into the dressing room.  

“You can’t blame me for trying!” she laughed.  “What about Melissa?”

“Which one is Melissa?”

“The one who coordinated the HVAC repair to the tower last month.”

Natasha…” Steve said, his voice going for ‘warning’ or ‘not again’.  “You sound like Old Mrs. Goldstein who lived two floors down from me growing up.  She was convinced Bucky was going to die alone and unloved if he didn’t find a girl who was dumb enough to settle for him.”

“And what about you?” Natasha asked.

That got Steve to crack open the door and smile.  “She figured I’d die alone after getting punched by someone for talking back to them.”

“So, pretty much how you’re likely to die now,” Natasha pointed out.

“Pretty much,” Steve said, and closed the door once again.

“Excuse me,” Peter said.  “But… um… I thought you said that there was a big crisis that needed the Avengers?”

Natasha dropped down onto the bench next to Peter and smiled.  It wasn’t that it was unnerving when she smiled, Peter decided, it was just that you couldn’t tell at all what she was smiling about.  Like, was she smiling about Captain America in a dressing room? Or the pile of clothes in his lap? Was she smiling about how it was silly that Peter thought she wanted to be spider bros, even though he’d never actually used the spider bros line yet?  He was gonna wait until they were taking down the bad guys, and then slip is casually into conversation, and she was gonna laugh and think that it was brilliant, and then he’d name the text thread that they’d inevitably start SPIDER BROS and it would become a thing.  

It’s like whenever MJ decided to smile.  She only smiled when she thought he was doing something stupid.

Oh… shit… was the Black Widow smiling a ‘Peter you’re so dumb’ smile?

“What I said was there was someone who needed our help,” Natasha pointed out.

“And it was… Mr. Rogers?”

A bigger grin this time.  “I love it when you call him that,” she said.  “Look, I’ve been trying to get him to update his wardrobe.  He lives in khakis and SHIELD shirts, unless someone specifically pulls something different out for him.  I think if he had his way, he’d live in his uniform.”

“I mean, what’s wrong with that?”

Natasha leaned in a little closer.  “Do you have someone you like?”

Yes. “No.”

“Have you dressed up for them in the past?”

Yes. “No.”  Peter’s eyes went wide.  “Wait, does Mr. Rogers have a date?  Is that why we’re here? Are we getting him ready for a date?  Where would someone like him go on a date? Like, the Statue of Liberty?  Is that too cliche?”

She reached over and gave him a squeeze on the shoulder.  Peter tried hard not to look too excited. It was the same thing she did to Captain America!  They really were going to be spider bros! “It’s just a closet refresh,” she said. “Don’t think too hard about it.”

“But… if it’s not something… wait, why me?” Peter asked.  “Why did you and Mr. Stark ask me to come along?”

Natasha shrugged as Steve emerged.  “We told him you were struggling with a personal problem, and he jumped at the chance to help.”

“Wait, you used me as bait?!”

“And I fell for it,” Steve replied.  He placed his hands on his hips and glared at Natasha.  “Taking advantage of an old man is elder abuse.”

Before Peter realized what he was doing, he’d lifted his phone to take a picture of Cap’s stare of disappointment.  “Sorry, sorry,” he said. “It’s just that’s the exact look you have in the videos they show when we have detention, and I always thought that was some acting they made you do, but it’s…”

“It’s just his face,” Natasha beamed.  “But I’m immune to it. Plus, I don’t think that’ll be any way to get a response to profile I put up for you on SexySeniorDating.com.”

“What detention video?” Steve asked, ignoring Natasha’s jab because Peter was sure that she’d actually put up a dating profile for him behind his back.  Would she?

“You know, the ‘so you’ve found yourself in detention’ video,” Peter explained, doing his best Captain America expression, complete with sigh and pursed lips.  “There’s a whole bunch of them.”

Steve looked like he was going to deflate right there, and his frown was about as large as Natasha’s grin.  “I still can’t believe I let Tony talk me into those,” he mumbled. “Just like your USO tour,” he mimicked. “But enriching the minds of today’s youth.”

“You were recently thawed, your brain was probably still a little icy,” Natasha pointed.  

“No, wait, they’re great!” Peter insisted.  Insulting Captain America would probably completely squash his plans to be spider bros with the Black Widow cause even if she liked to make fun of him, no one else could make fun of Captain America.  I mean, he was CAPTAIN AMERICA. Why would anyone want to make fun of him? He was amazing, and he was here hanging out with Peter, even if it was technically because Peter was bait in a convoluted plot for the Black Widow to keep making fun of him…

Wait… ‘squash’... like a bug… he just got that!  He needed to remember to tell Ned that he’d come up with a great spider pun with his spider bro Natasha.

“I can pull one up for you!”

“Please don’t.” “I already have one as my voicemail message.”

Steve and Natasha turned to stare at each other.  Peter was pretty sure neither of them were telepathic, but he couldn’t actually be sure, but there was obviously something getting exchanged between them.  

Steve was the first to relent.  He sighed, shook his head, and grabbed another couple of shirts from Peter’s lap pile.  “Let’s get this over with,” he said, retreating back into the dressing room.

“Wait, I’m going to find you a jacket,” Natasha said.  

“I already have a jacket.”

“Not one you’ve gotten shot in, a nice blazer,” she called out as she left Peter to watch Steve and, as she’d explained when this whole outing started, ‘make sure he didn’t run away like a coward’.

“Is.. there anything I can get you, Mr. Rogers?” Peter asked.

A laugh came from behind the door.  “No, kid, I’m fine.”

“I’m sorry for being bait,” Peter continued.  “I thought there was, you know, a thing that needed attention and all hands on deck.  I didn’t know shopping was part of the… internship. Mr. Stark keeps it pretty… undefined.  You know, and I totally get why, and I’m not complaining about it at all. That’s not what I’m saying.  I’m happy to be here and do whatever I can to help. I just didn’t think it would be… shopping buddy.”

“I’m pretty sure this falls under other duties as assigned.  But if it makes you feel any better, people have tricked me into foolish job related duties since the 40s.”

OMG he and Captain America had something in common!  Maybe it wasn’t just him and the Black Widow that were going to be SPIDER BROS.  Maybe Captain America didn’t think he was just a kid from Queens and they were going to be bros too!  He didn’t seem to hold the airport stuff against him. Not too much. He only brought it up once. Maybe twice.  The Falcon brought it up a lot more. But if Captain America thought they were just like each other… oh man, if his seven-year-old self and his Captain America lunch box could see him now.  Wait, there could be a lunch box with both Captain America AND Spider-Man on it! With their arms around each other! Giving a thumbs up!

He had to text Ned.  He’d die seeing the same look on Cap’s face as the videos.    just out w bw & cap bc we’re bff now he texted along with the picture, followed quickly by disappointed!cap is disappointed .

The response was immediate, like Peter knew it would be.

...but it wasn’t Ned.

I thought you were at Ned’s studying??

He’d accidentally texted Aunt May.

sorry!! I meant to send that to Ned

That was fine.  She knew about… all of it.  And it proved he wasn’t getting shot at or thrown off a building or any of the number of things she’d yelled at him that Mr. Start was irresponsible for letting happen to him once she found him in his suit.  And considering that that’s what he thought he’d be doing on this little outing, she should appreciate how little danger he was in compared to how much he could’ve been in if what he thought was going to happen actually had happened.  How could she object to a shopping trip… even if he had told her this morning he was spending the day with Ned working on their lab reports?

Why is Captain America disappointed with you??  What did you do?? AM I GOING TO BE DISAPPOINTED WITH YOU??

no it’s fine I didn’t do anything. I’m at my internship.

“Are you texting the girl?” Natasha asked, scaring the shit out of Peter because for some reason she was the only one who could sneak up behind him without his senses catching on.  “Is it the one who you dressed up for that you said you didn’t?”

“What? No!” Peter tried to look as casual as possible, but his phone started buzzing again.   Wait, I recognize those dressing rooms.  I’m going to give Captain America a piece of my mind.

“Is something wrong?” Steve asked, cracking open the door to the dressing room and catching the blazer Natasha decided to throw at him.  “Do we need to-”

“My aunt is coming cause I accidentally texted her, and I thought I was texting Ned cause you made the face and I thought he’d find it funny, and May’s too worried that I’ve done something to make Captain America mad at me, and I think she’s coming to yell at you, so please don’t be angry with her, she doesn’t mean it, she just… I think she likes yelling at people.  Mostly Mr. Stark,” Peter explained. “But she doesn’t yell at him a lot! Only when he shows up. Or when I come home with a bloody nose. But those aren’t always Mr. Stark’s fault.”

“Just usually,” Steve said.  “Does she… know about...”

Peter nodded.  “Yeah, she knows.”

“Maybe this is a good thing,” Natasha said.  “We could use another opinion. Because those jeans are going to make Heather in Operations -- “

“No.”

“Or how about Tonya in -”

“Natasha.”

She just smiled that MJ smile again.  Peter was certain there was no way she was giving up, and surely Cap realized that.  He could say no all he wanted, but Peter would bet money she’d have him on a date by the end of the week.  

It took 15 minutes, but eventually the back and forth interrupted by, “Peter?”

The three of them turned at the new voice and Peter gave his Aunt May the most contrite, most apologetic, most ‘but at least I’m not dangling off of a building and the highlight of the 11pm news’ wave that he could muster.  “Hi Aunt May.”

“I think you wanted to yell at him,” Natasha added motioning to Steve, who at this point was standing there with a pile of clothes draped across his arm.  

“Yes,” May said, pausing to just stare at him for a moment.  Peter was sure this wasn’t going to end well. She wasn't impressed at all with Mr. Stark each time he showed up, and sure he was the only one of the Avengers to show up at their apartment, but if she wasn’t impressed by Iron Man, surely she wasn’t going to be any more impressed by Captain America, especially once she got it into her head that he was angry with him.  “You’re a lot taller in person.”

Steve smiled.  “Yeah, I get that.  Sorry, where are my manners.  I’m Steve,” he said, extending his free hand.

May shook his hand and smiled as well.  “May Parker. You know Peter through… his internship?”

Steve nodded.  “He’s a good kid.  Quick on his feet,” he added.

“Sticks with something until it’s finished?” May volleyed back.  

“Really swings for the wall,” Steve replied, amused.  He was interrupted by Natasha clearing her throat. “Oh, and this is Natasha.”

May let go of Steve’s hand a gave the Black Widow a wave.  “Yeah.  These are not the friends I thought Peter would be hanging out with in high school,” she added.  “Or the job I thought he’d have in high school. I mean, Jesus, I worked in a grocery store in high school.”

“Oh, really?  Me too!” Steve beamed.  “And, I don’t mean to brag, but I got pretty good at stacking apples into a pyramid.”

“And there would be some ass who thought it was funny to pull the piece of fruit from the bottom of the stack?” May laughed.

“And then I’d point it out and get knocked around a bit in the alley,” Steve admitted.  “They didn’t pay me enough to put up with that kind of jerk.”

“How much did they pay you?”

He grinned.  “A quarter.”

“Oh yeah, you totally deserved at least 30 cents,” May replied.

“Yeah, that’s what FDR said too,” he laughed.

“See, May, he’s not angry at me,” Peter interjected.  He didn’t want May to get laughed at any more by Captain America, and if he could just convince her that he was fine, and Captain America wasn’t angry with him any more, and it was just a joke, she wouldn’t have to hang out in the dressing room with them any more.  “His disappointed face was for something else.”

“What was his disappointed face for, then?” May asked.

“I got tricked into going shopping,” Steve admitted.  “Natasha thought I could use some help with some new clothes and told me that Peter needed my help.”  

“And you just wanted to help him?” May asked.

“He’s a good kid,” Steve said.  “Of course I wanted to help him if he needed it.”

“Yeah, I like him.”  May turned and smiled at Peter over her shoulder.  “I think I’ll keep him.”

“So… everything’s cool,” Peter said.  “You can head home.”

“Or you could help Steve decide between a couple of shirts that he was debating,” Natasha intejected. “We could use another woman’s opinion.  I like the blue, but Steve is partial to the white.”

“Sure,” May said.  “Always glad to help.  And blue is always a good color.  Especially with your eyes,” she added.

Okay, so not how Peter saw the afternoon going.  At this rate he’d never find the right time to suggest to Natasha that they be SPIDER BROS, especially not with May bothering Captain America…

***

“May?” Peter called out as he closed the apartment door and dropped his backpack on the couch.  “I’m home.”

“How was school?” she called out from her bedroom.

“It was fine,” Peter answered.  “Sorry I’m late, we had Decathlon practice and then I had to finish my lab report with Ned.”

“Not a problem, dinner is in the fridge.  Blue lid. The spaghetti from last night.”

“Are you going somewhere?  I thought you worked days this week?”

There was a knock at the door.  “Peter, can you get that?”

“Sure.”  He opened it to find Steve standing there, in one of the outfits Natasha had bullied him into buying last Saturday.  “Hi Mr. Rogers. Hey, wait, what are you doing here? Does… does Mr. Stark need me? Did he send you to come get me? Wait, what’s going on, I can… May!” he called out.  “I’m going out-”

“Hey, no, it’s not an internship thing,” Steve said, stepping inside the apartment and closing the door behind him.  “Not an Avengers thing.”

“Oh,” Peter said.  “Then what are you doing here?”

May popped her head out into the living room and smiled.  “Hey, you found it okay.”

“Yeah,” Steve replied.  “Sorry, I’m a little early.  Never spent much time in Queens.”

“Not a problem, I’m ready to go.”  

Peter realized that May looked a lot nicer than her normal Tuesday night sweatshirt and… “Wait, where are you going?”

“Steve and I are going to grab some dinner,” May said.  “Like I said, spaghetti is in the fridge. I’ll be back in a little while.”  She kissed his forehead as she walked past. “Make good choices.”

“Good to see you, Peter,” Steve said before focusing on May.  “You look really nice.”

“Why thank you.”  She gave a quick little tug on the hemline of his t-shirt as he opened the door for her and led her out into the hall.  “Blue looks really good on you.”

It took Peter a full minute after the door closed before he was able to sputter out, “You… make good choices.”  Before he could question it any further, his phone buzzed.

Thx for your help on Sat!  Mission accomplished - FINALLY got old man out on a date

No shit, Peter thought, as he changed the name of the text thread from ‘Natasha’ to ‘SPIDER BROS’.  She could just deal with it.

[spearbe]

sorry to bother you but i noticed that you post a lot of nct content and i was wondering if you could tell me a little bit about each member? maybe even link some videos (don't worry if that's too tedious)? im a new NCTzen and i would like to know more about nct :)

omg hello fellow NCTzen and welcome to this crazy and amazing fandom! it’s not a bother at all, hopefully others will find this helpful as well :) now let’s get this party started!

taeyong:

known for having “2D visuals” bc he’s so handsome but he gets really shy when ppl compliment him IT’S ADORABLE 

super powerful stage presence like just watch any nct u or nct 127 live performance and he will BLOW YOUR MIND

if he didn’t become an idol he 100% would’ve become a world famous chef  

actually pretty sensitive like he seems tough + cold but he just wants to be loved so LOVE HIM PLS

taeil:

vocals voCALS VOCALS 

kind of awkward and a total dork but also really lovable

really likes mark’s ears lololol

would truly succeed if he debuted in nct dream

johnny:

his iconic parrot impression. enough said

1/3 of the foreign swaggers squad (he’s from Chicago) 

really genuinely cares about all the members (not to say that the other members don’t but he especially sticks out to me as such); he cheers everyone on and is super supportive 

is a daddy

yuta:

his healing smile could cure cancer 

loves winwin with all of his heart

so underrated like he can sing, rap, and dance (HE HAS IT ALL) but still doesn’t get much screen time or lines 

secretly the most savage person in nct

kun:

SM did him so dirty bc he has yet to debut in any of the current NCT units (but there are rumors about a china unit debuting soon so hopefully he will debut then or sometime soon!!)

so good at magic tricks like the whole world was shaken when he performed a card trick on one of nct’s v lives

a total sweetheart like you can tell that he’s a genuinely nice person 

nicknamed “fat kun” by his roommate, lucas (who else)

doyoung:

his eyebrows move a lot when he sings

does not and will not deal with anyone’s shit (like a no nonsense sort of guy but in a more relaxed way if that makes any sense lol) 

part bunny 

if you let him mc and host his vroom vroom talk show he will be a very happy camper

ten:

a dancing legend, his hit the stage performances are proof; this one is my favorite

a total scaredy cat 

you honestly can’t not love him he’s so full of love and gives so much love 

surprisingly really funny like some of the things he says will make me cry actual tears

jaehyun:

1/3 of the foreign swaggers squad (he lived in america for four years which totally qualifies him as a foreigner lol)

can go from cute to sexy in half a second

apparently a couple people from his high school find him unapproachable bc he’s too good looking lolol 

has the cutest dimples

winwin:

needs more lines + screen time + appreciation 

ridiculously flexible

used to be kind of lost bc he didn’t speak much korean but he understands and speaks a lot more now! 

needs to be protected

jungwoo:

looks A LOT like taemin

so fluffy and soft i just want to hold him he’s so precious alskdjghada 

can impersonate several of the nct members

sweet + soothing vocals

lucas:

will pick his nose anywhere (especially on v live) if he deems it necessary L M A O 

really wants to be part of the dreamie squad (he knows literally all their choreo) 

basically the most extra member of nct 

justin bieber’s doppelganger 

mark:

so so so hardworking he tries his best in everything and is the only member to be a part of all three current nct units

rly doesn’t want to be a square 

1/3 of the foreign swaggers squad (he was born + raised in canada) 

gets bullied by the dreamies 24/7

renjun:

a true angel but may actually be the devil in disguise? like you do not want to get on his bad side he will FIGHT you 

used to have an adorable snaggletooth but it’s gone now :( 

a good bro to chenle; he used to translate a lot for him but chenle’s korean has improved a lot so renjun doesn’t have to translate anymore! 

early riser maybe idek lol 

jeno:

has a beautiful eye smile :) 

“no jam” meaning he’s no fun (at least according to the dreamies); i beg to differ

animal lover 

goddamn he can dance (he and jisung need their own sub unit) 

haechan:

a very affectionate troll (especially with mark); he will hug you + kiss you + LOVE YOU but he will ROAST ur ass a hot second later 

such a brat but everyone loves him anyway 

in my opinion he’s kind of an underrated vocal like i wish people would appreciate his voice more 

basically the king of covering other groups’ dances 

jaemin:

he was one hiatus for a while due to a back injury 

like it became a huge thing and fans were really worried but now he’s back better than ever!!

his rapping will set you on fire 

lowkey kinda jealous and possessive of everyone LOL

chenle:

has the cutest dolphin laugh 

didn’t really know a lot of korean when he first debuted (renjun translated for him a lot) but now his korean is really good! 

really clingy + affectionate + overall just plain adorable 

has the potential to become a really powerful vocal, especially as he gets older

jisung:

lowkey the most savage person in nct #maknaeontop 

made all the noona fans faint with his lemonade dance challenge

do not let him choose yaja time as a game bc he will go hard on your sorry ass 

used to be such a smol but is now all. grown. up. 

i hope this was helpful and that the videos (credit goes to all original owners) were enjoyable! sorry if this is ridiculously long haha. if anyone wants another “starter pack” like this one for a different group feel free to pop a request in my ask box! anyway, have a great day anon and i hope you learned more about nct and love them even more

[fandomtrash4]

Spiderman’s Secret {11}

Word count: 1,773

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7  Part 8  Part 9  Part 10  Part 12  Part 13  Part 14  Part 15

I feel my phone start to vibrate, and with the almost complete silence around us, it's audible, even without super hearing. Before I can form the words, any words, really, to disguise the buzzing, he pulls my phone out and throws it as far away from us as possible, ensuring no one can reach me, and I can reach no one.

~

I try to remember where he threw my phone, memorizing every detail, so I can pick it up later. I glance at my captor. He looks to be in his mid-twenties with stubble on his jaw. He's dressed in all black, which confirms that this wasn't a spur of the moment decision. This was a thought out and planned act.

"So, what do you say we lose the chains?" I ask sweetly.

"Not a chance," he replies.

"Aw, why not? Surely a strong man like yourself doesn't need a chain to keep little ol' me where you want me. And it hurts. It's bruising my wrists and my sides." He huffs before removing the chains around my torso. He grabs a rope and binds my hand, leading me like one would a stubborn, shy dog. "So much better." I grab the rope in front of me and yank as hard as I can. He flies towards me, hitting his head on the cement. I unwrap the rope, using it to tie him up instead.

I throw him into the van, making sure he's secure, before grabbing my phone and driving to the nearest police station. Before I go inside, I change into my suit, electing to not be myself for this. I switch the rope with webs, pulling his partially conscious body into the station.

"Well, well, well. If it ain't my favorite Spider. What have we got here?" One of the officers wonders.

"An attempted kidnapper. Hey, Rickie. How are you doing?" I answer.

"Doin' well, Spidey. Doin' well. Will I be seein' you again tonight?"

"Not tonight, Rickie. Was on my way home when I saw this one, so I took a little detour. I'll be out tomorrow, though. I'll be sure to stop by and say hi."

By the time I get home, Peter is already sleeping soundly. I silently climb into my bed, shaking my head. It's a miracle he hasn't been caught yet. Just before sleep finds me, I hear a voice.

"Where've you been, Pipes?" Peter asks.

"It doesn't matter, Pete," I mumble. In my near sleep haze, I feel hands grabbing my arms. My eyes fly wide open, and before I realize what had happened, Peter is on the floor, with me on top of him. "Sorry," I wince.

"Who did that to you?"

"No one." He gives me a look. "It's nothing, Pete. Just drop it, please."

"Go to sleep, Pipes. We're talking in the morning," he says before returning to his bed. 

I wake up to see Peter sitting on his bed, waiting patiently. I debate falling back asleep or just fleeing to the safety of wherever May is, knowing that Peter wouldn't dare ask about it around her. One look at his face and I know I can't do either.

"Morning, Pete," I say.

"Pipes, what happened last night? And don't tell me nothing, because that is not nothing," he replies, gesturing at my wrists. At the bruise that still surrounds them.

"It's fine, Pete. I handled it. It won't happen again."

"No, don't give me that. Tell me what happened. Please, Piper."

"I got jumped. These are from the chains they put around my body. I got free and took them to the cops. But I'm fine, really." Peter looks at me for a while before nodding, satisfied with my answer and half-truth.

"Something weird happened to me last night. These people were robbing a bank, but they had some serious high tech weapons. One of those weapons lifted me, but it didn't touch me."

"You're right, that is weird. You tell anyone else? Like Happy or Tony?"

"I told Happy, but he didn't really seem that interested, you know?"

"That's not it, is it? There's something you're not telling me. Spit it out, Peter."

"Ned knows."

"What?!? How could you let this happen?"

"He was waiting in our room when I got back last night. He saw me crawl on the ceiling in my suit, what was I supposed to do?"

"Peter, you have got to be more careful. And Ned better not tell anyone, you know what he's like. We have to keep a close eye on him. If he talks, you're done, and you know it. Ned can't really keep a secret to save his life." I pause for a minute. "Does he know about me?"

"No. You know I wouldn't do that." A knock on the door. "That's probably Ned."

"I'll get it. Grab our bags, we're going to be late." I make it to the front or before Peter has even left our room. Opening it, I see Ned, like Peter predicted, ready to walk to school. "If you tell anyone what you saw last night, I will make you regret it. Do you understand me? We may be friends, but if you spill that secret, nothing will save you." Ned looks completely terrified, but he nods. That's good enough for me, for now. "Good. Peter, you ready?"

"Yeah," he replies, walking up behind me. "You alright, dude."

"He's fine. It must still be sinking in," I say before Ned can open his mouth. Ned regains his ability to speak and starts asking questions about "Spider-Man".

"You got bit by a spider? Can it bite me? Well, it probably would've hurt, right? You know what? Whatever. Even if it did hurt, I'd let it bite me. Maybe. How much did it hurt?"

"The spider's dead, Ned," Peter answers. The boys stop when we near Delmar's. One glance tells me exactly what kind of danger my brother was in. Our favorite sandwich shop is almost gone.

"You were here?" Ned asks.

"Yeah."

"Pete, you could've died," I say.

"Do you lay eggs?" Ned wonders.

"What?" I question.

"No," Peter laughs.

Ned continues in chemistry class, and I have a feeling these questions aren't stopping anytime soon.

"Can you spit venom?"

"No."

"Can you summon an army of spiders?"

"No, Ned."

"The Sokovia Accords were put in place," the history teacher starts.

"How far can you shoot your webs?"

"I don't know. Shut up."

"... to begin regulating..."

"If I were you, I would stand on the edge of a building and just shoot it as far as I could-"

"Shut up, Ned."

"Hi, I'm Captain America. Whether you're in the classroom or on the battlefield..."

"Do you know him too?"

"Yeah, we met."

"... fitness can be the difference between success or failure."

"I stole his shield."

"What?"

"Today, my good friend, your gym teacher," the recording of Cap motions to the right, but Coach Wilson is standing on the left of the T.V., "will be conducting the Captain America Fitness Challenge."

"Thank you, Captain. I'm pretty sure this guy's a war criminal now, but whatever. I have to show these videos. It's required by the state. Let's do it." 

Peter is doing sit-ups while Ned holds his feet. I'm next to them doing sit-ups on my own.

"Do Avengers have to pay taxes?"

"Shh!"

"What does the Hulk smell like?"

"Shhh!"

"I bet he smells nice."

"Ned, you have to shut up," Peter and I say.

"Is Captain America cool, or is he like a mean, old grandpa?"

"Ned, just shush, okay?" Peter pleads.

"Hey, can I be your guy in the chair?"

"What?"

"Yeah. You know how there's a guy with a headset telling the other guy where to go? Like, like life you were stuck in a burning building, I could tell you where to go. Because there'd be screens around me, and I could, you know, swivel around, and... 'Cause I could be your guy in the chair."

"Ned, I don't need a guy in the chair," Peter tells him.

"Looking good, Parkers," Coach Wilson says, walking past us.

"Now, see, for me, it would be F Thor, marry Iron Man, and kill Hulk," Betty comments.

"Well what about the Spider-Man?" Charles wonders.

"It's just Spider-Man," Betty replies. As one, Peter and Ned turn to look. This can't be good. I stop my sit-ups and pay close attention to that conversation. I have to stop Ned before he blurts something he shouldn't.

"Did you guys see the bank security cam on YouTube? He fought off four guys," Liz says.

"Oh my God, she's crushing on Spider-Man," Betty says.

"No way," Charles answers.

Liz shrugs, "Kind of."

"Ugh, gross," Betty replies. "He's probably, like, thirty."

"You don't even know what he looks like. Like, what if he's, like, seriously burned?" Charles chimes in.

"I wouldn't care. I would still love him for the person he is on the inside." Oh, no! Ned's gonna say something.

"Ned, don't-" I start.

"Peter knows Spider-Man!" Ned shouts. Everyone turns to look at Peter except me. I'm staring daggers at Ned. I check my strength before slapping his arm. "Oops."

"Yeah, 'oops'."

"No, I don't. No. I... I mean..." Peter tries explaining it away.

"They're friends," Ned continues. That earns him another slap, a little harder this time. "Ouch."

"Yeah, like Coach Wilson and Captain America are friends," Flash says, dropping from the rope he was climbing.

"I've met him. Yeah. A couple times. But it's, um... through the Stark internship. Mm-hmm. Yeah, well. I'm not really supposed to talk about it."

"Well, that's awesome. Hey, you know what? Maybe you should invite him to Liz's party. Right?" Flash adds.

"Yeah, I'm having people over tonight. You're more than welcome to come," Liz says.

"Having a party?" Peter repeats.

"Yeah, it's gonna be dope. You should totally invite your personal friend Spider-Man."

"Um..." Peter starts.

"It's okay. I know Peter's way too busy for parties anyway, so..." Liz tries helping.

"Come on. He'll be there. Right, Parker?" Flash goads.

"Well, if it's to prove you wrong once again, they'll both be there. Peter and Spider-Man." I say, putting an end to this conversation. The bell rings soon. Everyone files out, but the three of us hole our little circle.

"What are you doing?" Peter asks.

"Helping you out. Did you not hear her? Liz has a crush on you," Ned starts.

"And Flash is a bully who needs to be proved wrong. Don't worry, Pete. It'll be fine," I reassure him, giving him a little wink Ned can't see.

[theartificialdane]

Galactica, part 243

In this we party, characters take sides, Raven is attentive, shit hit the fan and Bianca keeps checking Instagram.

Thank you @toriibelledarling @samrull and @veronicasanders - You’re all amazing, and V deserves an extra shout out for being the master of drama <3

“Allison!” Jaslene hissed, approaching the blonde over by one of the nail stations. “Did you hear what your roommate and her friend are saying about Raven?”

Allison’s shoulder’s tensed up. “Oh god, what?”

“Apparently that bitch Courtney is going around gossiping about the Marie Claire shoot where her girlfriend fired Raven, and the Galactica show where we had that little tiff with Tati, all of which I thought was ancient history, didn’t you?” Jaslene looked like she was about to boil over, the woman fiercely loyal.

“Yes, I did, but we’ve totally put that behind us-- I mean, Courtney is pretty ok-”

“So why is she still talking about it, on camera?! Is she trying to railroad Raven?” Jaslene threw her arms up.” Are they trying to make her look bad at her own party? Because I’m not gonna let her get away with that! Now come on Alley cat”

“I really don’t want to get involved in any Courtney Act drama…” Allison started, very unsure if she should follow Jaslene’s plan.

Jaslene put her hands on her hips. “Did Bianca del Rio threaten you, too? Is this about that time you dated?”

“We didn’t exactly date-”

“What does she have on you?”

“Nothing! I just don’t want to--”

“Ugh! Where’s Naima?” Jaslene turned on her heel and stomped away, clearly done with Allison.

***

If there was one thing Jeremy could do, it was butter up a damn middle-aged woman. Especially a tipsy one. He smiled at Ramona.

“They’re reeeeally big fans of yours, but they’re too shy to come up to you. They told me they want advice on how to get attention from cameras. But if you ask me, they are plenty beautiful and dramatic. I mean, there was a whole shakeup at the Galactica show last fall, that got a bunch of press. I’ll give you all the details.” Jeremy gave another sly grin, handing Ramon a glass of wine. “They just probably need to own it more. Maybe you could encourage them.”

“Thanks, Jeremy, I’ll tell them!” Ramona giggled, sipping daintily from the glass, Sonja leaning on her arm for support.

***

“Ravey! You ready for your surprise?!” Juju shrieked, yanking her best friend by the arm and dragging her onto the dance floor.

“I guess so?” Raven raised an eyebrow. She’d made it a point as the host not to get plastered, but Juju didn’t seem to have that trouble. Her matron of honor was wasted.

“NOW!” Juju yelled, and a bunch of police officers swarmed into the room.

For a moment, Raven was frightened, until she realized what was going on. Ohhhh, /those/ kind of cops. She turned and laughed at her crazy best friend, who was already grinding on one of the young, burly “police officers.”

Attracted by the hot strippers and happy shrieking of the hostess, more guests began pouring onto the dance floor to join in the fun.

The Hot Cops formed a line and, in unison, ripped off their tearaway pants. Raven clapped her hands. “YEAHHHHHHHH!”

The guys spread out and began to dance with Raven and the rest of the guests. Juju snatched the hat off one of their heads.

“Hey, cutie…” grinned a tanned, muscular stripper, coming up behind Courtney and dangling a pair of handcuffs in front of her. “You’re under arrest.”

She frowned distastefully, slurring, “Um, no. You know what’s not sexy? Police brutality...”

Adore covered her face with her hands, looking at the bewildered stripper apologetically. “Sorry, she’s drunk.” She grabbed Courtney by the wrist and pulled her into the lounge area. “Jesus, dude. He’s just a dancer.”

“I mean, come on Adore. Does anyone in this country even read the news? What’s sexy about cops? Honestly.”

“You are /insane/. Here, eat this chocolate thing. What is this?” Adore examined the fancy-looking pastry, shrugged, popped one in her mouth and handed the other to Courtney, then shoved the blonde towards the sofas where Jinkx and Alaska were lounging, relaxed after their massages.

“Adore, I have something to say, alright? I’m allowed to have a voice!” Courtney insisted. “Stop oppressing me, like some kind of republican fascist.”

“Okay fine.” Adore greeted both of her girlfriends with kisses and flopped down on the couch, pulling out her phone. “Go ahead, buttercup. Tell us allll about what’s wrong with the Hot Cops. And America.”

“Well,” Courtney began, “For starters, maybe they shouldn’t kill unarmed minority children? I mean just this year there were like 4 million.”

“Four million... stripper homicides?” Adore clarified from behind the camera.

“Yes!...No...Adore, shut up…And the war on drugs! Is a bunch of bullshit! And the KKK! Just had a rally! In Orange County! ORANGE COUNTY! CALIFORNIA! That’s like...what?!...” Courtney continued.

***

Raven was having a splendid time at her bachelorette party and she couldn't be more content. Her custom drinks were flowing nicely, her guests enjoyed the decadent pastries and even though there was a fully equipped camera crew, it didn’t feel invasive at all, but then again, Raven had always loved attention above everything else. And the bevy of hot male strippers was the icing on the cake.

She got up, giggling, from her third lap dance, kissing the dancers on the cheeks and tucking a large tip into each of their g-strings. She noticed a familiar, slender figure tucked around the corner and decided it was a good time for a break from the sweaty dance floor and the champagne, and to check in on her young maid of honor.

"Hey, are you ok lovey?" Raven asked, approaching Violet. "You’ve done such a good job hiding from the cameras; I almost forgot you were still here."

Violet blushed bowing her head, knowing that even in the midst of her fun, Raven grey eyes missed nothing. "Sorry," Violet replied softly. “This isn’t really my scene..”

Raven nodded at Violet's response, there was indeed a lot happening in her home, from camera crews and manicurists. The group of drunk adult women who were filming was being tolerated, just as long as no one spilled or broke anything.

Raven drained the rest of her champagne and placed the glass on a nearby table. "It's a lot more stimulation and energy than I anticipated at first. I'm going to kick the camera crew out soon, they should have plenty to work with and they're not even paying me to be here."

Violet smiled at Raven's pout, the other woman truly spoiled, though she had had no problem with the camera crew filming her opening her mountain of pre-wedding presents. "The nerve of some people."

"I know!" Raven agreed with a smile, "letting them enjoy the opulence of my home and hospitality, and I didn't charge them for their dirty tread marks on my once clean floors."

"Hopefully Raja doesn't freak out," Violet supplied. Frida had never been in Raja and Raven’s apartment for that exact reason, the little dog properly housetrained, but Violet didn’t want to risk her beloved dog ending up on the end of Raja’s rage.

"You know, if you want, you can leave and go to Sutan's.”

Violet looked around at the party still in full swing, literally and figuratively, "Are you sure? I don't want to be rude…”

Raven waved her comment away with a wave of her left hand, engagement ring catching in the light. "Don't worry about that," Raven said kindly, standing up and offering her hand to Violet so she could stand. "You're not a party girl.”

Violet accepted a warm hug from Raven and headed for the door, just missing the moment when all hell broke loose.

***

“Well, it looks like the girls are having fun,” Sutan commented. He turned to Detox, showing him a snap from Jaslene of Juju getting a lap dance from a half naked cop. His girls had been sending him snaps all night, the models all loving the quick and easy way to contact their manager to either tattle or brag, and he was pretty sure tonight was a series of brag snaps. Sutan had looked for Violet a few times, but just as he had expected, she was nowhere to be seen, except for a few pictures with Tatianna that looked like they had been taken in a kitchen. A new snap dinged in, and a video of Juju throwing champagne at the strippers ass came on, everyone yelling with excitement.

“My lovely wife,” Detox sighed happily, handing out plates full of grilled steak and vegetables.

“Thanks, Detox, this looks delicious!” Fame exclaimed as she took her plate, the woman clearly slightly wine drunk.

“Well, it looks edible. Don’t exaggerate,” Bianca corrected, leaning over Sutan’s shoulder to see the pictures. Sutan just handed Bianca his phone since he knew she was looking for pictures of Courtney.

“You realize you can just text her, right?”

“Shut the fuck up Amrull.”

Patrick rolled his eyes. “I’ve truly missed this hostile energy…”

“And we missed you too, bro,” Detox said, thumping him on the shoulder.

***

“You know,” Ramona said, putting one arm around Celia and the other around Naima. “You guys just need to embrace your naturally dramatic natures and you’d get tons of publicity.”

“What do you mean?” Celia asked.

“I mean like that thing at the Galactica show! Sure some people may have thought you were bullying that girl but hey! It was also very entertaining and you were just like, being you! Don’t apologize.”

“Is that bitch still talking about us?!” Naima demanded.

“What bitch?” Sonja slurred.

“COURTNEY ACT!” Celia snapped.

“No, she’s not. I didn’t know you knew her. You know her?” Sonja smiled.

“Don’t play dumb with me!”

“She’s not playing dumb, she’s just a little dumb,” said Ramona.

“Ramona!”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, you know I love you!” Ramona threw her arms around Sonja and kissed her cheek.

“Um, hello? We’re not done here!” Naima exclaimed.

“Sorry, who are you again? I was just trying to be nice, because I heard you wanted advice--”

“Heard from who? That dumb bitch Courtney? Cause she’s a lying whore.”

“What is happening? Sonja asked, blinking.

Jeremy yawning, stretching, picking up his walkie. “/Jane, are you seeing this? I need a raise./”

***

“Oh shit..” Allison saw the fight happening in slow motion, everyone’s voices growing louder and louder, Celia and Jaslene both looking like they were ready to murder. All of them were drunk, and Allison knew that if there was one thing Celia didn’t give when she was drunk, it was half a fuck. Alllison looked around, quickly locating Tatianna, the only thought in her head that they had to get out before the producers caught them on camera. If anyone filmed either her or Tatianna anywhere near the fight, it could be suicide for the campaign Tati just landed with Moschino and the assistant photographer gig Bianca had gotten her with [designer]’s Spring campaign.

“Tati! Come on! We’re leaving!” Allison exclaimed, grabbing Tatianna’s purse and hand, tugging the woman away from the chair she was sitting in, only half of her nails painted.

“I’m in the middle of a manicu-”

Allison dragged her towards the door.

Tati barely had time to grab her shoes before flying down the hall after the petite blonde. “Okay, okay, slow down!”

***

“Did you just throw a DRINK at me?!” Ramona shrieked, red faced, looking like she was ready to haul off and slap Celia. Sonja jumped up to hold her back as the rest of the guests began to pay closer attention to the argument.

“You bet your fat ass I did!” Celia screamed back.

“FAT?!” Ramona lunged forward, clearly about to grab Celia by the hair, when Raven raced over and stood in between them.

***

Violet pressed the elevator button, more than ready to go downstairs and take Frida for her afternoon walk. Violet was considering if she should call Betty and hear if she wanted to watch a movie since she knew Sutan was worth next to nothing when he was drunk. It had been forever since Violet and Betty had hung out outside of work, both of them busy with the holiday collections.

Violet couldn’t wait to find out what Shane was like around the Christmas season, the man a genius in the kitchen. At Halloween Shane had made candied apples, the treats so good Violet had had two. The door opened, and Violet stepped inside, picking her phone out of her pocket, already dialing Betty.

“Hey! Hold the elevator!”

***

Bianca hung up the phone. No answer, again. Fuck.

BIANCA: Everything okay, baby? I haven’t heard from you all night.

BIANCA: I really hope you’re having fun

Bianca shivered, standing on the patio, hiding from the party inside. She’d waited as long as she could, but finally, after not hearing from Courtney for hours, the possessiveness took over, crawling up her spine, and she’d dashed outside without an explanation to try and make contact.

BIANCA: Call me if you get a chance, okay? I love you

Bianca sighed and opened the door, heading back inside.

***

“Thank you for letting us in Violet.” Allison looked around. It had been ages since she had been in Sutan’s apartment, the place exactly as she remembered it, right down to the horrible art on the wall. Orange wasn’t a good color, ever, no matter what any acid trip artist said.

“You’re a lifesaver.” Tatianna smiled. “I mean, I look like a homeless person, who only has four nails done?”

Allison could feel that Tatianna was giving her a dirty look, but Allison didn’t take it to heart. If she knew her friends right drinks where flying upstairs right now, and she was just grateful not to be here.

“It’s fine.. But.” Violet put Frida down, the little pug happily running around her owner’s feet as Violet took Tati’s hand, examining her nails. “I think I have a color that matches this… Should I look for it?”

“I’d be delighted to step into your salon!” Tati giggled.

***

“Just what in GOD’S NAME IS GOING ON HERE?!” Raven yelled.

Suddenly, Ramona, Sonja, Celia, Jaslene, Naima, and Fo were all screaming at once, and none of it made a lick of sense.

“This bitch tried to bring up ancient history--”

“I was trying to help you--”

“Nobody asked for help you old hag--”

“--dragging your name through the mud--”

“--and that little cunt Tatianna!”

“--I’ve never even met Tatianna, who does--”

“--Courtney and her big fucking mouth--”

“--I literally have no idea what you--”

During the course of this commotion, Courtney had come running over with a stupid innocent expression, Adore at her heels, and Raven was sick and tired of all of them, feeling a pounding headache coming on.

“ENOUGH! All of you, get out! And that includes the cameras. Now!!”

Everyone stopped talking, looking at her with slow, blinking eyes.

Raven waited for a beat, and when nobody moved, she added, “I SAID NOW!”

The entire room erupted in chaos again as everyone began to panic, screaming at each other, scrambling for their coats, Jaslene bursting into tears.

Raven stomped away from the group to call Raja, barely holding it together.

***

Raja lay sprawled on the couch, her feet in Sutan’s lap, head in Fame’s, listening to her friends tell stories about her wilder single days.

“...Remember when you and Jinkx got thrown out of that nightclub in Queens and arrested for drunk and disorderly conduct and then Jinkx /bought/ the club and you legit passed out on the chaise lounge after a bender and she made the bouncers put caution tape around you and told everyone that you were part of a performance art piece?”

Raja burst out laughing as her phone began to ring. “We were quite the team...”

“Oh, god, and remember when-”

“Hold that thought-” Raja said, sitting up and answering her phone. “Hello, princess, how’s the party goin-”

“You have to come home /right now/, everything is RUINED!” Raved wailed.

“Wait, what? What are you talking about?!”

“I should never have let the cameras come! The fucking housewives practically got into a fistfight with the elite girls and I’ll explain more when you get home just come NOW!”

Raja stared at the phone, shaking her head. “Dear god.”

“What the hell was that about?” Detox asked.

“Apparently there was drama with the housewives and some of your girls, TanTan.”

“Fuck.”

“She’s really upset. I better go.” Raja signed, reaching for her purse.

“I’ll come with you.” Sutan and Bianca looked at each other, both of them speaking at the exactly same time, the worry for their girlfriends clear in their faces.

Bianca snickered bitterly, following Raja to the door. “Who would have guessed there’d be drama at an event orchestrated by Andy Cohen’s minions? Your fiancée is an idiot.”

Fame cleared her throat, looking down at her phone. “Uhh, B...I think I figured out what Courtney’s been up to. Check Adore’s insta story.”

Bianca pulled out her phone while she exited, nearly slamming the door in Sutan’s face in her haste to find out what the fuck Fame was talking about.

“Jeez, B…” he griped, following the women out to the car.

***

Bianca sat in the backseat of the car beside Sutan, clicking through Adore’s instagram story, cringing at Courtney’s drunken nonsensical ranting.

On the screen, Courtney was going on and on, pacing around the lounge area, swaying unsteadily in her heels while the trifecta of the damned egged her on.

“What was I saying?”

“You were saying the cops need body cameras because of corporate lobbyists,” Alaska offered, as Jinkx laughed in the background.

“Yes, because of the prison industrial complex, which, think about it, is really what all of this is about, capitalism, and money, and the fucking rich people taking everything and using racism to control people. Jinkx understands. Right, Jinkx?”

“That’s me. Capitalist scum.” Jinkx yawned.

“Jinkx, it’s not your fault! You’re a victim too! I mean that’s why you’re an alcoholic. The guilt!”

“Jesus, Courtney,” Adore said, though Jinkx was still laughing.

“Sorry, but I’m just being real. And why isn’t healthcare free? Can anyone answer that? I mean can you answer that? Like right now?”

“No one can answer that, Courtney,” Alaska giggled.

“Just what in GOD’S NAME IS GOING ON HERE?!” Raven’s voice suddenly cut through in the background, causing all four girls to jump in alarm.

Hoo boy, Bianca thought, clicking off and calling Courtney once again. Hopefully she was somewhere safe and getting sober after whatever fight Raven was talking about, which thankfully appeared to be taking place away from Courtney and Adore. Bianca was slightly pissed at her sister for putting that nonsense up on social media, but she’d deal with her later.

No answer. Fuck.

“Well, I guess you shouldn’t be throwing stones about anyone’s intelligence tonight, huh B?” Raja teased.

“Shut up,” Bianca sighed. She decided to try Adore instead. Maybe her sister would answer.

***

Ramona burst through the elevator doors into the lobby, drenched in red wine, burst into the lobby shrieking like a madwoman, followed by a giggling Sonja, being supported by Courtney, and trailed by Adore, Alaska and Jinkx.

“Who does that little B.I. think she is?!”

“What’s a B.I.?” Alaska asked Jinkx.

“I think she means ‘bitch.’”

“I was trying to help her! And her little posse of nobodies! And she calls me old, and FAT!?”

“Ramona, slow down! I don’t understand, what were you even fighting about?!” Courtney asked.

“Apparently your little feud with those models caught up to you, Courtney, and they took it out on me!”

“Feud?! What feud?! Ramonaaaaaaa! Slow DOWN!” Courtney chased her out the door, onto the sidewalk.

Adore answered her phone. “Hey, B, what’s up? Yeah, I’m with her...Well, she’s not answering because she’s currently chasing a crazy blonde woman down the block...What do you mean ‘filming her in a compromising position’? She had her top on…Yeah, I’ll make sure she gets home safely….Calm down, mom.”

Jinkx laughed. “Your sister is too much.”

***

“You realise I’m not a professional, right?”

“What? Really”

Violet smiled at Tatianna’s mock surprise, trying not to blush, as she carefully painted each of Tatianna’s nails. This was the longest she had ever touched the other woman, and it felt weird, but also oh so good. It was like her own little secret, a safe place since Violet knew without a shadow of a doubt that Tatianna was completely straight.

“Oh my god, have you checked Insta?” Tati laughed, holding her phone in her free hand. “Can you believe Adore caught Raven’s face?”

“What? Really?” Allison took the phone.

“Remind me to avoid any future housewives-adjacent activities.”

“I will,” Violet said.

“I dunno, I think it’s kind of fun…” Tati mused.

“Wrong answer!” Allison scolded, pinching her on the ass. “If Sutan could see you no-”

“Hey girls.” The girls turned around, and saw Sutan standing in the door, his jacket over his shoulder.

“Sutan!”

“What are you doing?”

“Drinking wine and painting Tatianna’s nails.” Allison smiled sweetly before she moved to make space for Sutan on the couch, the man sitting down. Allison could see on his face that he was burning with curiosity about what had happened at the party, but she also knew that Raja would most likely fill him in on anything he needed to know, the twins never keeping secrets from each other as far as she was aware.

“Do you want a glass?” Allison held up the bottle, and Sutan nodded with a smile, his arm around Violet, all of them soon falling into easy conversation about their christmas plans.

[ryanmeft]

Spider-Man: Homecoming Movie Review

All Marvel Studios really had to do with their new Spider-Man movie, after a rash of poorly received efforts from Sony, was to get it right. It didn't need to blow anyone's mind; it just needed to be Spider-Man. It is that. It also contains the best supporting cast in a Marvel movie to date, pitch-perfect comedic timing, a fantastic villain, and some genuine twists whether you've read Spider-Man for decades or couldn't tell a Doctor Octopus from a Doctor Robert.

No matter how good a superhero movie is, the part a reviewer always dreads is having to describe the origin story, but I'll give it m...wait, there's no origin story? No, there isn't. It's one of the many touches that make this iteration of the web-slinger fast and funny: it just assumes you already know about Peter Parker's famous origin, and only briefly mentions a bite from a spider in passing. Right to it then: the film begins eight years ago, as a private clean-up crew led by a man named Adrian Toomes (Michael Keaton) is getting set to cart away the remains of the alien battle from the Avengers, a job that is apparently a windfall (2017 minus 2012 equals five, not eight, but it's no big deal). He's stopped by an officious Tyne Daly, who informs him Tony Stark has created a thing called Damage Control to deal with this kind of stuff and that he's out of a job. Realizing he's already got some of that sweet, sweet alien tech sitting in his warehouse, he announces "World's changing, boys. Time we changed too."

Jump ahead eight years, and Peter Parker (Tom Holland) is an energetic, overconfident Spider-Man, getting on the nerves of his handler Happy Hogan (Jon Favreau) and begging his patron Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) for more important assignments than retrieving stolen bicycles and giving directions to old ladies. All of this builds from Captain America: Civil War, though Homecoming is a stand alone story that doesn't deal too directly with the fallout from that movie. Parker's no Avenger. Despite his comics pre-dating those of most of Marvel's characters, he's always been the kid in the room; the movie makes that official by having him be several decades younger than Iron Man or Cap. He's enthusiastic, naive, awkward, and yes, sometimes annoying, because a 15-year-old who is never annoying is like a unicorn. He acts before thinking (as when he heroically stops a man from stealing his own car), confronts crooks without considering the potential collateral damage, dismisses the advice of his mentors and treats it all like a game. He's bullied, too, though not as brutally or physically as in the comics, perhaps because that's a hot topic these days. If you give a put-upon kid a high tech suit that can actually talk to him, the power's likely going to go to his head. Holland gets both the man and the mask right: inside the suit he's a celebrity, outside of it he's too awkward to admit a crush.

He's up against a baddie who is a nice break from the usually larger-than-life villains of Marvel's movies. Toomes builds himself a suit of armor and set of mechanical wings that he can also operate independently of the suit, and becomes The Vulture, though this name is never stated. He doesn't want to rule anything; he simply wants to make a better life for his family and crew. To this end, he pulls off small-scale heists of alien tech, which his men turn into weapons for sale to ambitious crooks. Keaton is vital to the film. As Sam Raimi proved in his first two Spider-Man films,  the hero needs a good villain to be effective, someone who is fascinating even when not pulling off acrobatics. Keaton makes Toomes more of an antagonist that should get equal billing. He doesn't kill if he can help it, focuses on crimes that won't get him noticed, and isn't given to grandstanding. Keaton's key moments come late in the film, in which, like any smart super-baddie, he tries to get the hero on his side. Most of the time that goes something like this: "Join me and be totally evil and kill lots of people." Not tempting for most. Toomes's offer is more realistic: join me and get a slice. Donald Glover, in a small-but-effective role that is also a nerd nod, calls him a psychopath, but he doesn't seem like one.

Also vital is the strong supporting cast. I was of the opinion that this was a major weakness in the much-loved Wonder Woman film, and Spider-Man is the opposite of that. Instead of being defined entirely by a single character trait, Parker's classmates, teachers and family seem like real people living real lives. The students naturally get the most attention. Parker's crush Liz (Laura Harrier) is the serious leader of his Academic Decathalon team, while his classmate Michelle (Zendaya) is frankly more interesting, nerdy, aloof and abrasive in that way young, smart people are. It's frankly a major step forward for female roles in superhero movies that she is both a nerd and not the butt of jokes; she puts me in mind of Mae Whitman in the underrated film The Duff. Peter's best friend Ned (Jacob Batalan) is adorably nerdy, more so than Parker, and I'd like to note that no jokes are made at the expense of his size. Marisa Tomei is completely perfect as an updated Aunt May, and rather than shy away from the ridiculous nothingburger that was the controversy about her age, director Watts and his army of screenwriters emphasize it, as waiters and billionaires are not shy about flirting with her.

Other excellent roles that I just don't have the space to go into detail about (I'm so sorry, actor people) go to Tony Revolori, Garcelle Beauvais, Logan-Marshall Green, Bokeem Woodbine, Michael Chernus, Michael Mando, Jennifer Connelly, Kenneth Choi, Hannibal Buress, Angourie Rice and Martin Starr. This alone is a shock. I recall my dread at having to simply list every X-Men character every damn time, and here I am wishing I had space to devote to each of a dozen minor characters.

The film's more down-to-earth plot is reflected in action sequences that mostly feature Spider-Man squaring off against a single baddie, but the two that define the character are when he must try and keep the Staten Island Ferry from splitting in half due to his own arrogance, and the final showdown with the Vulture, which I dare not describe. The reason they're fighting in the first place may be a bit shaky, but that's par for the course. What matters is the last fight feels, like the one in the original Iron Man, true to each combatant. Their respective motivations don't change at the last minute, and neither behaves in ways that haven't been established as part of their personality. The conclusion, and even the obligatory mid-credits scene, reinforce this as one of the better rivalries in superhero flicks. I'll go ahead and toss in a disclaimer here: I'm a big Spider-Man fan for lots of reasons I won't be discussing here. I have enjoyed all of the movies, though unlike the first two, I haven't felt the need to see the last few more than once. I saw this one twice in one day, when I almost never see a movie twice, period. Your mileage, as they say, may vary, and if you loathe the webbed one this won't change your mind. It is absolutely a product of the MCU universe, and trades in the quirk of earlier films for a more grounded story that may not be to everyone's tastes. Those who longed for Edgar Wright to return to Ant-Man may be left cold. For most, though, I think they'll find Jon Watts and his mob of writers have made a true crowd-pleaser. That word gets thrown around a lot to define a movie that is basically sugar (all sweetness, no nutrition), a definition I personally reject. Homecoming may not be prime rib, but it's completely enjoyable the whole way through, sad and surprising at times, with both good guys and bad guys you want to see again. The day I feel the need to get sniffy about a movie like that is the day I ought to hang it up. And yes, that was a reference to Spider-Man's webs. Hey, I never denied my own nerddom. Verdict: Highly Recommended Note: I don’t use stars but here are my possible verdicts. I suppose you could consider each one as adding a star. Must-See Highly Recommended Recommended Average Not Recommended Avoid like the Plague You can follow Ryan's reviews on Facebook here: https://www.facebook.com/ryanmeftmovies/ Or his very infrequent tweets here: https://twitter.com/RyanmEft All images are property of the people what own the movie.

[artificialqueens]

Make America Gay Again (Shalaska) - Chapter 2 - Grey

A/N: Thank you for the kind messages on the last chapter! I really appreciated them. 

An ear splitting ring shot through the air. Sharon covered her ears as she watched Michelle pick up the phone installed in the bus. She tried to shake the nightmare she had been having, all that glass and wood collapsing around her as Alaska, covered in blood, continued to throw grenades into her grave, laughing.

This was worse than being hungover. This was far, far worse. Her head pounded, shoulders screaming with pain. Her legs were basically jello they were so tired, lungs aching for a breath, her ribs bruised.

She slowly, painfully changed into boy clothes and finally washed her face with some hand soap and water from a bottle.

It was still morning, the thin light trickled through the slats in the windows. She couldn’t have gotten more than an hour or two of sleep. Her mouth tasted sour, and when she brushed her teeth she spat out blood.

Michelle stayed on the phone for hours, her serious face on, talking to headquarters. Sharon wasted the morning, scared to look at Alaska and nervous to be around Willam after their tift.

The bus had parked in a deserted county an hour north of Austin, waiting for instructions on the next mission.

Eventually, Sharon found herself opening the emergency exit in the roof of the bus, just above the highest stacked level of bunkbeds.

It was February, early springtime in Texas, the earth barely shaking the dregs of winter. Springtime had been coming earlier than ever after Trump made the executive decision to end all attempts at preventing global warming.

She pulled her aching limbs onto the metal roof, relishing in the heat on her sore muscles. She laid out, pretended she was suntanning at the beach. She could practically hear the distant crash of waves, the call of seagulls, Alaska’s ecstatic laugh at her side. They used to go to Lake Erie together every summer, where Alaska had grown up. She’d tell Sharon stories of being a kid, riding her bike through those same roads, getting ice cream at that now-closed convenience store when she got chore money from her mom.

Sharon could recall their drive up the lake the last  summer they were together. Trump had just been declared as the Republican nominee the night before. Alaska had held Sharon’s hand the entire car ride up, silent, rubbing her long thumb along Sharon’s knuckles. The quietest act of rebellion.

Sharon was yanked harshly out of the memory as Phi Phi climbed through the hatch and laid down next to her on the roof.

They were quiet for a few moments. Tensions between them had been high after their season of Drag Race, but it was hard for Sharon not to come to like Phi Phi. She was so determined and headstrong, so brash and unafraid. So unbelievably extra. It had taken a while, but eventually they realized the reason they had feuded so much was because they were so alike.

“It’s so nice up here” Phi eventually said, looking up at the wide desert sky. Not a cloud in sight, the sun was steadily climbing higher and higher as the time spun closer to noon.

Sharon “humphed” in agreement.

“Not like the mess in the bus.” She said. Another long pause rocked between them. “Alaska’s gonna be okay. She climbed far enough away from the explosion that most of her injuries were just from the fall from the crane.”

Sharon nodded slightly, her tangled hair swaying slightly in the weak breeze.

“Are you mad at me for letting her do it?”

“Phi Phi, I love ya girl, but if you’re looking for a fight now is not the time.”

Phi scooted herself closer to Sharon, turning her head to look at her. “You can’t make enemies out of all of us. Willam alone could kick your ass.”

Sharon turned to look at meet the other’s eyes, glaring. I could totally kick Willam’s ass. She thought annoyed, before seeing the glint in Phi’s eyes, the half smile on her tan face.

The two locked eyes for a moment before Sharon snorted out a laugh, rolling her eyes. “Okay, fine, I’m not mad at you. I just don’t know how all of you could be so irresponsible.”

Phi rolled her eyes. “Sharon, you’re being ridiculous. If you were the one to throw the explosives you’d do it in a heartbeat. And what the fuck are you doing now? Yelling at Willam for playing a small role in maybe slightly injuring Alaska, who you haven’t even talked to since we got back?”

Sharon bit her lip slightly. They had deflated since juviderm had become inaccessible. They made her feel so young, so untouched. It brought her back to being a kid, when she felt afraid all the time. Of the bullies, of herself, of all the uncertainty she had housed in her skinny frame.

She was absolutely terrified to talk to Alaska, for a thousand reasons she didn’t have words for. Alaska seemed like this distant concept, this idea that she had missed so fucking dearly for the past year. She couldn’t be real, that perfect person couldn’t actually exist. Her bony elbows and kind eyes and soft lips were some sort of fever dream, and holding them so close to her body last night as she ran back to the base was frighteningly real.

It felt like standing on one foot, reaching out into the mist, hoping someone would steady you. And Sharon was too afraid to see if Alaska was still standing in all that fog.

“Do you miss Mikhael?” She asked finally.

“He… he got deported, last May.” her voice shook, turning her eyes away. “They cut overseas mail, so I haven’t spoken to him since. I don’t even know where he is. I don’t even know if he’s alive.”

“I’m so sorry.” Sharon said, touching Phi’s shoulder gently. “I didn’t know.”

“You know, all those Trump supporters? How can they still believe in him? How has any part of this country become greater than it was before?”

Sharon sat up, legs folded crookedly under her malnourished body. “They’re evil fucking people. And if they’re not, they’re terribly misguided.”

Phi Phi wiped away a stray tear, rising into a seated position.

“I really am sorry about Mikhael.”

That fire returned to Phi Phi’s eyes. “Don’t let them take Alaska away from you Sharon.”

“We’re not… we aren’t… that’s over.” Sharon struggled out. “We can’t focus on that right now. She doesn’t love me anymore.”

As that sentence left her lips, she was hit with the idea that it might be true. That it probably was true. It had been a year, after all, since Sharon had refused to join Alaska and their friend Jeremy on the last plane out to California. A year is a long time in a war. Sharon had never considered the possibility that Alaska might have moved on. It was too painful.

Phi Phi was looking at Sharon like you’d look at a lost dog, a mix of pity and something else playing along her lips. A soft noise came from behind and they both turned to see Courtney, half out of the hatch, resting her elbows on the top of the bus with a crooked smile on her face. Her pink hair was tousled around her shoulders, mixing with the freckles dotted along her tan skin.

“You don’t just un-love someone.” Courtney said in her Australian know-it-all way. But her words had a soft certainty to them that drew Sharon in. “Sure, the other emotions, the new experiences might pile on top, might stifle the love. But it’s always there. You can’t run away from it all Sharon. Once you slip into that intimacy with another person, you’re linked forever. You already knew that.”

Courtney’s smile grew at the incredulous looks on the other two’s faces. “Come on back into the bus, make up with Willam. We’re going to eat soon.”

+

They ate lunch around the small coffee table that rested in the middle of the sitting area of the bus. Next to it was the long couch Alaska was recovering on, bookended by the two small armchairs that smelled like mold. Lunch consisted of cold beans, granola, and limp lettuce, with chicken for the non-vegetarians.

Sharon, cross legged across from Alaska, struggled to maintain eye contact with her mash of food. She didn’t know if she was embarrassed, guilty, or-god forbid-feeling things.

Willam plopped down next to her. “So ya gonna say sorry?” she spouted through a mouth full of chicken.

“I didn’t think you were the kind of person who needed an apology” Sharon asserted, looking up from her food.

“However-” she cut off Willam as soon as she opened her mouth. She didn’t need one of Willam’s monologues right now. “-I am. Sorry, that is. You did the right thing, the plan or whatever. I just got scared.” she quieted at the last sentence, stealing a quick glance at Alaska, who had miraculously been able to sit up for her meal.

“Ha! Pussy.” Willam laughed, but it wasn’t mean. Somehow all the shit that spurred out of Willam’s mouth never seemed to be mean. Sharon joined in laughing. She was just glad to be back on Willam’s good side.

Trixie slunk in from the bunk area, finally awake. “Mornin’ sleepyhead.” Willam chidded.

“How are you Alaska?” Trixie asked, her Wisconsin accent stronger with exhaustion. She was in one of her pink nightgowns, but wig and makeup-less.

Alaska moved to sit up a little more, Michelle hovering around her cautiously. Not having her real daughters to fret over had made Michelle more protective than ever.

“I’ll be fine” she drawled. And despite the damage she had sustained - it looked like she would be. Her arm was still fractured and her head wound would sporadically start bleeding sometimes, but the dizziness and confusion was fading.

“I’d rather be in your shoes than have to have another fucking night on guard with Michelle” Trixie rolled her eyes.

“You sure missed some drama” Raja joined, perched on the arm of one of the chairs. “Sharon nearly had a conniption, and Willam was passed out for a good minute or two after the shit went down.”

“You guys get all the fun” Trixie pouted jokingly.

“You were on guard because you were the only one who hasn’t been involved in any revolutionary activities before.” Alaska explained, always the rational one.

“So I hope fucking Katya in Australia for the past year was worth it.” Willam yelled, Trixie screeching and smacking him.

“For the record it was, you cunt” she stuck her tongue out as the noise died down.

“Heard she’s a total slopabottomus now.” Willam said factually, finishing his food and slinging an arm around Courtney.

“Do you have a fucking radar for when tops turn to bottoms?” Sharon asked incredulously, having confirmed Katya’s new sexual position by the redness spreading across Trixie’s cheeks.  

“A bell goes off and a picture of the fallen top flashes in her mind, like the fucking hunger games.” Alaska replied, laughing. She made eye contact with Sharon for a second, still giggling. Sharon could feel her heart swell with pride. Making Alaska laugh was one of the most fantastically happy things a person could do with their life.

“Even halfway across the world” Sharon noted.

“There’s probably hot gay aliens Willam can sense bottoming right now.” Alaska replied, still laughing.

Trixie interrupted the two, “All aliens are gay and that’s a fact.”

“The dead dad from Contact wasn’t gay” Courtney chimed in.

“He wasn’t an alien, bitch he was just dead.” Raja said through a mouthful of food, completely drowned out by Trixie screaming that someone had brought up Contact.

Sharon, half listening to the yelling match about whether the dad from Contact turned into an alien when he died, watched Alaska’s pained face as she tug on Michelle’s arm and whisper something to her. Michelle guided her carefully off the couch and into the back room, as the oblivious queens starting animatedly discussing whether Matthew McConaughey was gay too (“He has to be, anyone who agrees to wear that priest outfit for an entire movie has gotta be on the Kinsey scale.)

Sharon waited a second before quietly stepping around the scattered queens towards the bunks. She hesitated outside the curtain, trying to make out the near-silent whispers of Alaska to predetermine how welcome her presence would be.

Michelle didn’t looked surprised to see Sharon as she shuffled awkwardly through the curtain.

“Sweetheart, I have to go talk to Shawn. Could you sit with Alaska for a while? She’s in some pain.”

Sharon sunk into a crouch next to the lowest bunk bed. Alaska had curled into it, carefully moving around her bandaged left arm, the ulna of which she had snapped.

She was still smiling a little, lips also slightly smaller now that plumpers weren’t readily available for refill.

Alaska looked so much younger, with her short hair and fuller eyebrows. But the war had aged everyone’s eyes. Sharon could remember how tired Alaska looked those first few days Trump was in office. Every racist, sexist, or homophobic executive order that got sent out was like a personal stab at Alaska’s giant heart. A heart that by now could probably barely fit in her absolutely emaciated chest. If Alaska was skinny before, she was verging on disappearance, tucked into the bunk.

It took all the restraint left in Sharon not to run her finger along the others cheekbone. Just to test and see that she was still as warm as she remembered. Still as soft. Still smelled like earth and sweetness.

“I’m sorry.” Alaska broke the quietness.

Sharon almost laughed, it seemed so ridiculous to her that Alaska was apologizing.

“We shouldn’t have deviated from the plan without letting everyone know. We didn’t account for you and Raja hearing the first explosion, or for Willam’s yell when it went off too close to her. Raja told me how much that scared you both.”

Sharon stayed quiet. She didn’t know how to reply without being overwhelmed in emotion.

“It was irresponsible and it could have gotten you hurt.”

Hearing Alaska in this executive position was definitely strange. Everyone knew she was the best person to lead the operation-level headed, calm, intelligent beyond belief, able to make difficult decisions-that’s why she had unspokenly been accepted as such. But Sharon still saw that fierce tranimal in the PIttsburgh clubs, breaking the rules and laughing about it. Watching her become this grownup…

“And I just wanted to apologize.”

“Alaska…” Sharon could feel her eyes welling up, meeting the wide blue specs of her former boyfriend, someone she never thought she’d see again…

The only words she could choke out, “I’m just glad you’re okay.”

They both stayed silent for a moment, making and breaking eye contact, flitting in and out of the past.

Sharon finally broke the silence. “Do you remember how we used to go up to Lake Erie over the summer?”

“Yeah and you’d bitch and moan about getting too tan and how your fans would be upset if you showed up anything other than ghost white.” Alaska laughed.

“That’s not… really?” Alaska kept laughing at Sharon’s incredulous confusion.

“Yes, and you wouldn’t go in the water because it was too cold.” Alaska kept laughing breathlessly.

“Do you… do you remember any good things?” Sharon took a shallow breath, distraught thinking that she had misremembered it all.

Alaska stretched out her arm, touching Sharon’s cheek gently with cold hands. “Of course.” She said quietly. “Of course.

“We’d sleep in my childhood room because we couldn’t afford to rent a beach house, and you whispered into my pillow, like it was a telephone to the past, that baby Justin shouldn’t worry so much about fitting in, because one day I’d find you and I’d be happy. And my mom would make us pancakes every morning, and you’d eat them even though you hate pancakes, just to make my mom happy. And you’d kiss me every time you saw a seagull and said it was for good luck, even though we both knew you made that up. And one summer you made me laugh so hard I peed myself in that candy shop, and I can’t even remember what the joke was about.”

Alaska blue eyes gazed into Sharon’s, inches away. Her slow voice drawled over the words preciously, giggling intermittently. Her hand still rested on Sharon’s cheek. The world had faded into that fog, leaving the only the two queens.

“Don’t you miss all that?” Sharon asked, barely audible.

“I can’t afford to think about that any more.” Alaska said, her lips only slightly parting around the weight of the sentence.

“I can’t afford to stop thinking about it.” Sharon said, surprised at her honesty.

The sentence hung heavy in the air. It was true, Sharon thought. The thought of reaching Alaska again was the only thing that had kept her going all those months.

Alaska pursed her lips softly, curling her hand off Sharon’s face and back into the bed sheets.

After moments of silence, Sharon broke eye contact, yawning deeply.

“You’re tired.” Alaska chewed her bottom lip before opening her arms, pushing back into the depths of the bunk. “I know the couch isn’t very comfortable. You can sleep here if you want.”

Sharon, slightly shocked, moved from her crouching position into the small bunk and Alaska’s arms, careful of the broken one. Alaska’s long arms tentatively crept around her waist. Sharon gripped at the other’s hands, overwhelmed that after day upon week upon month of imagining Alaska’s body next to hers, it was finally there.

Her hands were shockingly cold, but she still somehow smelled the same.

Sharon felt the other’s forehead nudge against the back of her neck, pressing her nose into Sharon’s spine. Alaska’s voice softly whispered into Sharon’s messy hair,

“The world doesn’t stop for two lovers gone wrong.”

Sharon laid silently for a moment, absorbing the thought. “Do you think we can try to get it right again?” Sharon replied quietly, but Alaska had already fallen asleep.

[pviiiton]

Stella and Jenny

Stella and Jenny- Part 1 out of ? (It was originally only going to be a short story but I ended up falling in love with the characters and the storyline so this is going to be a whole series i guess)

Author: Peyton M. @hufflepuff-on-the-tardis @peys-shorts

Word count: 2,391

Jenny’s P.O.V.

I really don’t care if you re-blog so… here goes nothing!!

You know what is absolutely cruel? The way North Florida High makes me wait through multiple boring-ass classes that don’t teach me squat about actual things that I will need in life, all for the glorious thing that I call pizza, and then have it be the most shitty pizza on the planet. On top of that, they make me eat it in a room full of people. I hate it.

When I retrieve the shit pizza, I go and sit with my best (and only) friend, Max, who is already done with his pizza. Today his hair is a borderline neon shade of green, and only yesterday it was pink. I plop my rear end on the bench, and dig in. The pizza is doughy, greasy, and the cheese is totally fake, but right now, it is the best thing that I have ever tasted, I am so hungry. You see, I made the mistake of not eating breakfast this morning, which is in fact not good for a 16 year old girl who is only five feet tall but a totally kick ass skateboarder. Yep, that’s me, in case you were wondering.

As soon as I finish the pizza, Max stands up, and over all the noise, yells, “I’m going to head to the library.” I nod, and he walks away.

I hear someone calling my name, and turn around to see Stella Alden heading towards me, accompanied by her bratty bestie, Laura Jones. Laura hangs behind Stella as she comes up to me. She stops, and says, “Hey, Jenny. Do you know what the homework for last period is? I forgot to write it down yesterday…” Stella is in the same History class as I am. The thing about Stella is that she’s pretty, smart, has a great sense of style, and is one of the nicest people in the school. It just doesn’t seem fair to me, who is none of those things. It really pisses me off sometimes.

“Yeah. We were supposed to be writing an essay on the Trojan War,” I tell Stella. She smiles, thanks me, and then she and Laura saunter away, (this was mostly Laura) their long, blonde hair bouncing. I’ve never understood why Stella hangs out with that spoiled bitch. I sigh, and begin to stand up. Suddenly, I feel something hard hit the back of my head, and a cold liquid runs down my back. I whip around, and see a milk carton on the floor and Matthew Jackson and his entourage doubled over with laughter. He flipping had the nerve, I think. I start shaking with rage, and I’m seeing red. I’ve had to deal with Matthew’s shit since my freshman year, and I decide that I am done. I begin to storm up to him, but someone steps in front of me. It’s Stella.

“You asshole.” This was the first time I’d ever heard Stella swear, and by the astonished looks of everyone around me, it was their first time, too. Matthew stops laughing, and his mouth hangs open. “Leave her alone. If you’re going to bully her like that, you’ll have to do it to me.” Stella places her hands on her hips, waiting. We all know that he would do nothing to hurt her, seeing as she’s A) Popular and B) Naturally good-looking. Matthew grunts, and he turns around, and walks away, shoulders hunched, and his gang following close behind him. Stella makes a small hmph noise, and says, “That’s what I thought.”      

Laura looks back and forth between her friend and Matthew, then hurries after Matthew, yelling, “Wait up! She didn’t mean it!”

“Heck right I did!” Stella says. She turns around to face me, and begins to say something but I interrupt her, saying politely, “Thank you, but I could’ve handled it myself.” Her eyes widen, and she replies with,

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to… I mean… Sorry.” I tell her that it’s cool, and head to the bathroom to clean myself up. I wipe the milk from my short, red hair, and curse myself for choosing today to wear my favorite Paramore t-shirt. I throw away the poor paper towels, reapply another coat of plum lipstick, and am on my way to my next class.

When I get to my last class for that day, my History class with the ancient Mrs. Leeman, I sit next to Max after handing in my Trojan War essay. “I heard about lunch,” Max whispers to me. I shrug, and open my textbook to page 97, like Mrs. Leeman wrote to do on the whiteboard. On the top of the page, it says, “World War II.”

I look up from my book just in time to see Mrs. Leeman go up to the front of the classroom, and she says, “Today, I am going to be assigning partners for a group PowerPoint project on World War Two. I know, we’ve already gone over this, but you each will be focusing on a different part of the world during that era.” I groan. I hate group projects from the bottom of my heart, and if Mrs. Leeman will be choosing our partners, who know who I’ll end up with?

She begins to call out names. “Laney will be with Dillon, Rose with Rory, Jaiden and Terrianna, Amalia and Tyler, Parker and Haiden, Sadie with Sean, Taylor and John, Luka and Dean, Saniya with Harry, and Jane with Max,” Max stands up to go join his partner, and my heart drops into my stomach. “So that leaves… Stella and Jenny.” Shit.

I stand up, my face burning red. I go and stand with Stella, who gives me a large, blinding smile, and I give a small one in return. I realize that Stella is a whole lot taller than I am, and I try to stand up a little straighter, because I’m not about to be outdone by Stella Alden. I am still only as tall as her shoulders now. It’s okay. I’m used to being short.

Mrs. Leeman tells everyone which part of the world we would be researching for the WW2 project, and when she gets to Stella and I, she says America. I feel a bit better about this stupid project, since we wouldn’t have to do it on another country. We go and sit down at Stella’s desk, and divvy out responsibilities. I need to collect information on the military, and Stella would focus on the civilian aspect of things. We exchange phone numbers and E-mails, and I go back to my desk, and Mrs. Leeman tells us that when we have finished, we are dismissed for the day.

I go out the classroom door without looking back, and head to my locker. I grab my backpack and my gym clothes, which are in desperate need of a wash. I begin to hurriedly walk outside when someone taps me on the back. I turn around, and see that it is Max. “Hey,” he says.

“What’s up?” I ask. He smiles slightly, and I know exactly what he is going to say before he says it. “Nope. Nu-uh. Not again. I mean it. This is the fourth time this month.” Max has been trying to set me up with a boyfriend for as long as I can remember. He would set up dates for me with guys that I don’t even know, then expect for there to be some sort of spark or something. As much as I love Max, (platonically) I tend to get a tad annoyed whenever he does this. Just a tad. The last one went especially horribly after the guy who I was with tried to kiss me and I kinda freaked out and yelled, “HOLY FUCK NO!” way too loudly and got us kicked out of the restaurant. My bad, I should have known that explicit language was not allowed in that fine eatery.

“Can’t you just accept the fact that I’m perfectly fine being single?” And plus, I like girls. I don’t say that out loud, but I think it. I haven’t told anyone yet, not even Max. I figured it out after I saw this hot ginger in Publix a few weeks ago and had the overwhelming urge to kiss her. I didn’t, (sadly) and I ended up not even saying a word to her. On the drive home, I realized that this may be why I haven’t ever had a boyfriend. ‘Cause I’m a lesbian.

“Nope, I can’t accept it,” Max says, smirking.

“Have you ever thought about the fact you are single? You idiotic goose.” Max smiles.

“What a lovely name. I almost like it. Much better than the usual spread.”

“Shut your mouth, you filthy son of a bitch.” I sigh, and we go out to my car. I unlock the doors, and throw my backpack into the trunk. I am max’s ride to and from his house because he is still fifteen, thus he is not able to drive for another two months. As we pass the park, I turn down the radio, which is up all the way, and ask, “What time, and where? And what’s his name?”

“Five thirty, El Jalisco’s, and Dillon.” I nod, and turn into our neighborhood. I drop him off at his place, which is at the beginning of the six mile long drive to my house. I really like being in the car, the car radio blaring Twenty One Pilots, (ha-ha, get it??) and the bumpy road making my car shake softly.

I pull into the driveway, and get out of the car. I grab my gym clothes from the trunk, but leave my backpack. I’ll get it later. I unlock the front door, and step in. My little sister, Jamie, and my brother, Joshua, aren’t home yet, because Jamie’s only in 6th grade, and Joshua’s in 8th. Middle school doesn’t get out until about 4:30, and they take the bus home, so that means they normally are home at about 4:50-ish, which is good for me, so I have some time to do my homework while the house is quiet, even though I have all weekend to do it. I get started with math, and then move on to science and English. Before I know it, it’s nearly 4:00. I decide to start getting ready for tonight, and head up to my room. I hop in the shower, then wrap myself in a fluffy towel and brush out my short, brown hair. I slap on some heavy eyeliner, mascara, and bright red lipstick, and decide to give whoever I’m on the date with tonight a chance.

I put on my one pair of jeans that don’t have holes in the knees, and a clean Twenty One Pilots t-shirt. In my opinion, I look pretty nice, at least, nicer than usual. I check my phone. 4:30. I go downstairs, and turn on the television. I watch Doctor Who, and Joshua and Jamie come home. They go right into their rooms and get started on their homework. They often complain about how much their teachers make them do, and it always takes all of my willpower not to say, “It’ll only get worse.”

5:15 comes before I know it, and I grab my keys and hit the road. The drive to El Jalisco’s only takes me about ten minutes, so I go ahead and go inside the restaurant. There is a server (who is my age and totally good looking) who shows me to my table. I order a Sprite, and wait for Dillon to show up. Five minutes passes, then ten, and twenty. My waitress keeps coming back and refilling my drink, giving me looks of pity. It takes thirty minutes for me to realize that my date fucking stood me up. I want to blame Max, but he isn’t responsible for the actions of his friend, who I’ve never met but I’m already assuming is a d-bag. I mean, who leaves an amazing girl like me hanging like this?

I pay for my drinks, and leave the restaurant. On the drive home, I think of what a crappy day today has been. I call Max. “Hey, Jenny. How’s the date going?”

“He didn’t show,” I say, stopping at a red light.

“What do you mean?” I don’t respond. “Oh my god, I’m going to kill that-“

“Listen, I have to go. Talk to you tomorrow.” I hang up, and pull into my driveway. I go inside, and see that my Mom is already home from work. She is sitting with Joshua and Jamie at the dinner table, dishing peas onto Jamie’s plate. “Hey honey. Where have you been?”

“Nowhere. I’m going to bed.” I begin to turn around, but my mom says,

“Jenn, why don’t you eat some dinner?” I tell her that I’m not hungry, and go up to my room. This has been a shitty day if there ever was one. I put in my earbuds and get on Tumblr. I have a new message from The_potato_171023, who’s real name is Lizzie. She is someone that I’ve been talking to for a couple of months now. She is my age, and runs a fandom blog, like me. I haven’t talked to her in real life yet, but she is easily my second best friend. She said, Hey. Five minutes ago.

I message Lizzie back, saying, Hey. Wuts up?

She responds immediately, Nothing much. U?

I’ve had a pretty crappy day. Date stood me up, I type.

Sucks. Theyre obviously not worth ur time. Don’t think about it too much. U don’t need them. Ur beautiful. I think about this, and realize that she’s right.

Thx, I type back. I turn off my light, and turn up my earbuds. It doesn’t matter. I’m a fabulous little lesbian, anyways. I decide to come out tomorrow. Look out, world.

There will be a part 2 in a different P.O.V.