#but now this will be the second time i've posted photos because i'm obsessed with him so much

[cherriesandpomegranates]

Please be aware of my baby boy, Dracula. This coming Sunday I will have had him for a whole month 🥲🥰🥰

[reflections-in-a-critical-eye]

This will be more of a personal post sprinkled with some thoughts on AYS?!, so for those interested strictly in shipping content, you can skip this.

I couldn't help myself yesterday to wait until my work schedule was done. So I watched the first two episodes during lunch break and work, while using the keyboard from time to time to not appear offline.

And then a second time in the evening, without as many interruptions. I even texted my sister to remind her that the episodes have been released (she has JK's songs on her playlists and that's where it stops). My tone was very casual, as if I just remembered it was already up. As if I haven't actually been thinking and obsessing about that show for a year now. But that's because I can't let this online, fandom "life" seep through my other, "real" one. I've always struggled with my feelings of shame over being part of such spaces. Which is why I avoided them completely. Up until four years ago. I'm still dealing with it. I don't want to tell people that I have an interest in a kpop ship and that it's been ongoing for a few years now. It feels to foreign to the image I allow others to have of me and this kpop stuff is childish to say the least. I've fallen victim to the talking points I've argued against intellectually. But life doesn't work that way. My rational brain doesn't get along with my feelings.

So I keep my thoughts about shipping, fandoms, jikook here. And I share them with friends and people that have a connection to it. It's why I have a blog. So I can post a photo of jikook holding hands at the beginning of their journey and at least 10 people will understand it cause they like the same thing. I'm not a loser on my own here so the thought feels comforting.

I didn't have specific expectations about AYS?!, but I felt happy watching it. It was different, but a good different. Having the opporrtunity to witness them from morning till evening without any interruptions painted an interesting picture and it's the first time to see some parts of their dynamic.

They bicker, they flirt, they get lovingly annoyed, they get bored, they get silent, they get touchy. It feels more real than any 2-min clip from a Memories DVD could possibly show us. I don't want picture perfect jikook because it doesn't exist. Being in stan spaces, all I see everyday is worship, a mentality that is then transfered to the people surrounding the idol. But I don't want JK to worship Jimin 24/7 or vice versa. That's not a real relationship of any kind. I want to see them treat each other like they're just people. Which is what they did. Too bad that some have interpreted that as negative when in fact all we got were clear signs of actual closeness. And nothing beats it like Jungkook's attitude towards Jimin being sick. Shippers/supporters have clips and endless arguments on hand to explain the closeness between jikook, but honestly? That first evening in the cabin when JM was in the bathroom and subsequently the next morning should be the sole argument from now on. It can't be more obvious if it hit us in the head.

It's not about needing confirmation at every step of them being a couple. At least I don't need that. In the long run, it wouldn't even matter if they're not. What's noticeable is that they appear to be one and that doesn't come out of thin air.

Is my mood volatile these days? Yes. Actually these past few months. Do I need this show as one of those feel good series? Definitely, because there's nothing else out there to catch my attention in terms of tv content. I don't want to pick apart and poke holes and question every single line to make myself feel miserable. Everything else is too bad and I am too lame so I rely on this show for a short, temporary thing that improves my mood. I don't care about other things, doubts or worries. I really really just want to enjoy jikook doing whatever they want. I don't have high standards.

[kissmetwicekissmedeadly]

MO'S FANFIC BEAUTYFYING MASTERCLASS!👩‍🏫

So it seems like you guys like how I do my banners and layouts on @xxsycamore ! I wanted to share a few tips about making similar ones, along with some of my observations on their importance! Be warned, some of the screenshots I'll use to illustrate my point will be of my smut fics! This post is intended for the ikemen series community. While the tips could be found useful for other fandoms as well, it's important to note that it's only this fandom that I've taken into account and because of that my observations could be unreliable if you chose to follow my advice outside of the fandom!

The importance

First of all, a good layout is a subjective term. Second, a "good" layout is not guaranteed to boost your fic's popularity. Not all of us are able to put the time and effort into fancy banners and dividers, but the good news is, you don't really need them! You should always strive to do only as much as you can without straining yourself. Here you can see a minimal effort fic layout vs one that took 30~ minutes to put together, both posted around the same time, both having a similar reception when it comes to notes! Keep in mind that a layout is just one of the many factors to take into account for your fic's popularity status, and you shouldn't obsess with it either way.

2. The minimum: Banner + Title

Not everyone checks out every single post on their dash while they scroll! I follow around 1100 people and while not all of them are active, it's easy to miss a post that could as well have been the best thing I'd see that day. Your brain recognizes what a typical fanfiction post looks like - a rectangular picture with a title above/underneath, followed by text. As long as you scroll past a post with a similar construction and you're interested, you might want to scroll back and check it out.

3. Banners

The information that you get from a banner is typically about the character(s) featured in the fic. Using the example above, you'll see that a simple cropped picture of the character gets the job done! (an in-game sprite at that, not a fancy card photo)

If you decide to use a card, you can browse google for a good one of your character(s). I try to select a card that depicts something similar to what's happening in my fic, either the action or the "vibes" (daytime or nighttime, outside or indoors, canon or modern, etc.), but sometimes it's better to choose the one that will look good instead of the one that's more fitting.

Finding cards of good quality is also challenging, and I'd advise you to avoid blurry/low-quality banners even if those would be best fitting.

Stick to the rectangular horizontal format if possible. I like square banners sometimes, but it's better when you can see the whole layout at once!

4. Editing the banners & photo coloring

If you decide you want to go out all, you'll need a photo editing app or a program. I use one called Snow which is mainly for selfies but gets the job done. It has many filters to choose from, but inputting text there could be a hassle sometimes. Another one I use is Pixlr. Yeah, I couldn't let it go ever since the days it was just a website...it's been about 10 years but I still rely on it (now as an app) for some stuff, like cropping down images with very big height to width ratio (like thin strips for dividers). In very rare instances I use my (paid) art program, Clip Studio Paint. I know that many people use Canva for their banners but I can't get used to it, I guess it's not my thing, haha. That's why you should see what works for you. I prefer a certain amount of limitation, like having filters to choose from, simply because I don't want to think too much about it and to be able to spend too much time on it (I'm a perfectionist)...

Maybe you just want to give your picture some nice coloring, nothing too much, just a slight change of tone that it's noticeable but not in a screaming way. There are still some things to avoid, mainly old-looking filters. I'm talking about the ones that were mainstream on Instagram during the last decade, the pinkish sepia one for instance. Ones that have too high exposure value and make the bright parts practically glow are not a good look either, same for the too dark ones. Making the character unrecognizable is also not good, and some filters can do that, especially in the case where they have fair hair and the filter makes it appear as another color. Again, those examples are bad only in my own opinion and could look good in certain circumstances or if it's a desired look!

Here's the collage for the banner used for my fic Nine Nights (MDNI) before the filter (first picture), a variation I did but scrapped (second pic) and the one I went with in the end (third pic). While the bottom pic is in contrast with what I said about making characters unrecognizable, here I rely on the fact that it's enough that it's obvious this will feature all of the Crown members just by looking at the bunch of them. I liked how the colors pop up, almost as if each one gets assigned a theme color (interestingly I didn't pick the cards for that purpose), and it's just a pretty coloring in my opinion as a whole. I achieved this by tweaking the RGB values from the "Curves" tool in Snow.

Another cool thing to do with your banner is adding transparent elements in it, like how I did with this one (see it from the link below, it's not depicted here on the pics). The thing is, this could be very energy-consuming, you'll need an app/program that can do that as not all of them work with transparent images, and in the end, it could be just barely noticeable. But it can be fun from time to time.

5. Titles

A title is the other main element of your fic's layout and it should stand out. If you hate coming up with titles (understandable...) you can just put a "(character) x reader fluff", for instance. If you look at the example in point 1, I simply used the character's name in place of a title! It doesn't have to be a stressful aspect of putting your fic out there. As a side note, you can try centering your title simply by putting some spaces at the front, but leaving it aligned to the right could be a stylistic choice.

6. Colored text

This one is very optional but good if you want to fancy it up. Tumblr already gives you a bunch of colors to pick from and you can make use of them if they fit the style of your fic, but they're very limited. Luckily we can use just any color we want. (This only works on the fonts tumblr supports! The ones you can choose from when you highlight a text) Unfortunately, the way to do this will make you work with the HTML editor which you can access at the top right corner of your post editing screen (from desktop, click the settings, scroll down to Post editor) and things might seem pretty scary if this is your first time looking there. It's not too hard! You need to use a site that takes your desired piece of text, lets you select colors, and then gives you a code that once pasted in the HTML editor will make it colored when switching back to the Rich text editor. Here's the one I use because it also allows me to blend colors. At the bottom right of the page, I put the text in the first box, select the colors, and upon clicking Run it gives me the code in the bottom box. I use colored text for my title, and sometimes for my information tags.

7. Information tags

This is how I refer to the part of your layout dedicated to showing the pairings, genre, content warnings and wordcount of your fic. This is all optional even to add in the first place. I personally don't bother too much with beautifying that part, but a good tip is using some kind of symbol to separate these pieces of information if they're all in the same paragraph (I use big dots), or to place in front of them if they're in different rows (like bullet points). This gives a lot of creative freedom for text art, you should explore it if that's your thing!

8. Fonts & font size

You can experiment with Tumblr's fonts, or you can look for more fonts online - here's a handy site. It's good to find one that is legible enough. 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐟𝐚𝐯𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞. Again, be warned, those fonts that are outside of tumblr's post editor cannot be colored (as far as I'm aware of)

You can spell your title in all caps if you deem that's a good look for your fic.

Play around with bolds and italics instead of making everything a different font.

The "Biggest" font option here on the editor is not the best one to use as it's simply too big. Big title fonts should be avoided if your title doesn't fit in a single row.

Having different font sizes for different things in your layout can be eye-catching! Besides the obvious upscaling of the title, you can also upscale your information tags. Using small text is also nice and prevents your post from getting too long, but this should only be done for the part of the fic that is not the fic itself. Small text could be harsh on the eyes if it's in big quantities.

9. Dividers

Dividers are another crucial part of a fancy layout! They divide different parts of your layout, like the information tags and the fic's body. There are tons of styles to choose from. Some people like to use dividers that spell out something, like a "minors DNI" warning, a "support your creatives" reminder, the name of the character featured in the fic... You can make your own set of dividers for repeated use. I like to use very thin lines which I color differently according to the fic's theme colors. I also find dividers online, mostly here on tumblr, as there are tons of them if you look them up. It's important to use dividers which are marked free to use, or to otherwise credit their creators.

10. Additional tips

Use gifs. Everything that moves is eye-catching. But don't go overboard with it - one or two moving objects on your layout is plenty. They shouldn't be put too close to the fic's body too, as people might find it distracting. Avoid flashing and glitching gifs, or if you use those and you deem it necessary, tag the post with an epilepsy warning. You can make your banners into gifs by putting a moving filter on them, making it into a video, and turning the video into a gif (the site I use for this is called ezgif and it has plenty of other options for working with gifs and videos), and you can also make or find gif dividers.

Banner themes are nice, but they don't always look good. I'm talking about making a series of banners (like for a bunch of fics made for the same creative challenge) look the same, with the same coloring and filters. I used to make all my banners purple to follow my blog's tumblr theme but I realized not everyone looks good in purple...

Try adding a synopsis for your fic! I know, this is worse than coming up with a title, but we love flipping the book over to look at the synopsis before jumping into it. Keep it very short and try beautifying it with symbols or fancy quotation marks.

Use the "intended" font from the tumblr post editor to make your information tags or synopsis stand out and shrink the overall length of the post!

Put the body of your fic under a "read more" (the last option when you hit a new row in the post editor). This is very important, especially if you're writing smut - you wouldn't want to make people scroll through all of that if they're not in the mood for it. Putting your whole fic on the dash doesn't make it more likely for people to stop and read it, or at least that's just how I see it.

Use emojis! Emojis stand out!

Take inspiration from other people. Get out of your bubble and look at how other fandoms do it, but obviously don't steal.

11. Final thoughts

Making this post felt weird to me! I was motivated by my mutuals complimenting my layouts but also because some of them said "they can't do that" and I wanted to show them it's easy. I also wanted to show them it's not that important and that they shouldn't stress over it at all! At the end of the day it's your fic that matters, not how pretty you can make it work. But instead of simplifying it, I ended up with this massive post of 11 parts, and now it looks scarily big. It's not, okay! I went too much into detail at times, and I want to stress once again that it's all optional anyway. I, personally, don't follow all of this advice. I don't go through the 10 steps of constructing my layout every time I'm about to post a fic. I typically post my fics just before going to bed, and 99% of the time I need it to happen ASAP because it's that late in the night. It's a way to beat my perfectionism, really, and I find it to work for me. I also already have these steps tested and memorized so it all happens quickly and mechanically for me. Making the layout is extremely fun for me and this is my sole driving force for putting in the effort. At the same time, I remind myself not to go overboard because it's stupid to focus on it more than on the fic itself. I love ao3 because everything looks equal on there, but I also love tumblr because I can unleash my creativity in one additional way.

In the process of making this post, I started to wonder if it seems like I'm making this out to be way more important and difficult than it really is, and I want to assure you that this is not my intention at all!

My only hope is that this proves to be helpful for whoever feels like they can use some of the information above. If it leads to just 1 additional note to those criminally underrated fics I see, then I'd be beyond happy!

Have fun posting your fics :)

[jillvalentine]

re: my relationship with my abuser, currently @/gwendaria (part one?)

[edit: new usernames + accounts since this post has been made: scarymovies, walkingdeads, samcarpenters, the-mummy]

My abusive ex has unfortunately been going full-on with the latest DARVO / smear campaign, and this time it seems to have reached a few people. These callouts are made-up, and they've been popping up continuously in different forms since early 2021 in an attempt to silence or smear me, regardless of their inconsistencies. One second I'm an emotionally abusive gaslighter who they've finally been freed from. The next, I'm someone they don't even know about. The next... I'm a renown stalker. The next... I'm a random girl who got romantically obsessed with them and turned into a terf when I got rejected. The neeeext... I'm a terf stalker racist? Okay! I don't even know anymore. There's definitely more.

I mostly want to focus on the facts. The facts are that I've shared about my experiences enough that I shouldn't have to entertain stupid shit anymore. There will always be the next narrative, more scandalous than the last. Going forward, I just want to make the evidence more accessible so that anyone can find it.

I still have all of our texts, discord logs, whatsapp logs, voicemails, facebook messages, hundreds of screenshots from me and from others (onlookers & other people who have been harmed), and I've become friends with people who have also been friends with or intimate with this person and came out from the other side (some are public and others aren't, because, hey! Look what happened to me after I came out. I have been stalked almost on the hourly for about 4 years now, and I know it won't stop, because I know exactly who my abuser is.)

About 3 years have passed now, so a lot of the 'big' conversations or screenshots I shared earlier on when I spoke out about what had happened to me have been buried in time. (but they are, still there.)

Screenshots where they ragged on and on about my friends, about me being naïve and that I'd know better when I was "a real adult" like them, telling me to drop dead, telling me about slitting their wrists, telling me that someone was messaging them about 'cumming on my face' after I posted (1) selfie. Blocking me everywhere for a bit over that selfie. Unblocking me. Yelling at me. Blocking and unblocking me again because I said something about how they were being awful to me. Rinse and repeat with the next insane shit.

This was during covid lockdown, and it was 24/7. I couldn't fucking breathe. I got questioned about going to the supermarket with my mom. I got mindfucked for not explicitly saying I was back home when I said I was getting the mail, under the guise of caring so much about me, of course.

One time, I sent a snap of these leggings I liked online. Because the photo sent as a file instead of a normal-full-screen-just-taken snap, it became a whole argument of "Did you share this with anyone else?" and I would be like... what would be wrong if I did? Why is it wrong for me to send a photo of some leggings I think look good to a friend to get her opinion? A lot of conflict happened this way. They were incredibly controlling and suffocating, all under the claims of past trauma, undiagnosed mental illness, and most of all - flowery apologies or proclamations.

I used to think I was able to push through anything that happened because they would apologize to me, and it made it okay again. I genuinely thought they just needed someone to give them a chance to heal and get better, or get back to how they used to be early on in the relationship. I wanted to be that someone, I wanted to be strong enough to take all of it and be okay at the end. It gradually got worse, and I found myself trapped in the relationship. Anytime I was close to getting away, I would get drawn back with push-and-pull manipulation tactics. If I had pulled away to recover from their mistreatment, I was then the one apologizing for having had to pull away, and how bad that pulling away had affected them. How awful I was and how much I regretted being affected by anything. I would blame anything else (it wasn't you, it was my own anxiety) to make things calm down.

I didn't see any of this coming from the start. It was a gradual process. Near the end, I was googling things about how to fix toxic relationships (it didn't work because the relationship wasn't a two-way street, it was abusive), trying to think for 5 different people to avoid outbursts, trying to explain away how someone might gaslight and manipulate others without it being fully conscious and intended. I found out it was 100% intentional when I got out. They were telling others that I was doing to them what they were doing to me, along with a bunch of other bullshit to pre-emptively plant seeds.

Gwen frequently tries to use the worst buzz words to create stories and alienate people from one another. She doesn't care about any social issues. What she likes or dislikes is entirely based on what she needs to get out of a situation. If someone she's fixating on positively likes xyz thing, she likes it too. If someone she's fixating on negatively likes or dislikes something, she'll do the opposite. She constantly invented stories and tried to frame people I'd known for years, or anyone who dared to interact with my posts anywhere. She literally impersonated people and had accounts hacked. All she does is obsess over people. She constantly monitored me and created conflict over anything, real or made up. She especially liked to create conflict when it was late, or when I was otherwise not-fully-there, like when I was drugged following a surgery. I was so out-of-it that at that point I didn't want to fight for myself or others anymore.

Near the end of the relationship, I had a private account that I would hide on because social media, and really anything social, had become a minefield. Multiple people had witnessed the change from before the relationship, the start of it, up to the end. I deactivated my main twitter for a period of time (although I was careful enough to reactivate it once every 30 days so it wouldn't be permanently lost) and had to ignore people, stop myself from posting or liking things, and plead with people not to mention anything about me because I would have to answer for it. Multiple people remember me asking them to delete certain posts, or just be careful not to give out that I was doing anything with them. I was abnormal and an immature adult for wanting to spend a bit of time with or buy a gift for my friend on their birthday. We had an age gap, and at first, it was all "you're probably more mature than me :)" - until it turned to Real Adults Don't Spend Time With Friends, lol. Real adults are 100% focused on their partner. Real adults aren't on social media, and other thinly-veiled degradation + mindfuckery. Funny how my age became a bad thing, but they were the experienced 29-year-old who knowingly pursued the inexperienced 23-year-old.

Near the end of the relationship, I was starting to hide away to spend more time with people who treated me well, and it helped me get out. I saw that the way I felt every day wasn't normal. It reminded me of what good relationships are like and what they feel like. My friends tried their best to be supportive, but it was very difficult because my partner was trying very hard to isolate me from them through threats, aggression and manipulation. I'm incredibly lucky that they stayed by my side and told me that what was happening wasn't normal.

Getting out was hard. Staying out was hard. Even after everything that happened, following the split, I told my friends I didn't know what I would do if they tried to get me back again. SO fucking glad that's over.

[nipuni]

I have another DW report! It took a while because we've been hosting friends and family visiting from abroad for a few months now and had a lot of work on top of that so we haven't had much quiet time alone to sit and watch but we made it to the end of S10!!

I'll share our thoughts under the cut because it's a lot!

We adored 12! His run was amazing, one of the best! A lot of episodes became all time favourites for us and Peter Capaldi is now our second favourite Doctor after David. His acting is impeccable and he is a delight to watch. He is so funny and inspiring and everything The Doctor should be, absolutely loved him!!

We enjoyed Clara, her characterization had some inconsistencies with her having several different arcs that felt disjointed at times but she is so memorable and made herself into such an integral part of The Doctor's life. Watching her change and their relationship become more codependent and unhinged as time went on was super interesting. Nardole grew on us. And BILL? Bill!! Oh my god dear Bill managed to outsuffer even Martha and that is saying a lot, I'm still traumatized I was not expecting the finale to go that way for her what the fuck and what a finale that was, devastating, we loved it!! but GOD sweet Bill her fate was brutal, I would have loved to see her go on more adventures and grow 😭

Now, the highlight of these seasons for me was Missy!! I'm obsessed, she's my favourite version of The Master so far and my favourite character after The Doctor, I LOVE HER 🙏 She needs more seasons! (I'm aware of the audios I'll get my ears on those as soon as I can) She's hilarious and clever, mean but soft and so so gorgeous AHHHHH She somehow manages to be terrifying and endearing at the same time and you can feel and share The Doctor's hope for her. Her death broke my heart, what do you mean The Doctor will never find out she stood with him in the end!! The romance, the tragedy!! I didn't dare hope they would take their story there and they went above and beyond. Every second she was on screen I was holding my breath and kicking my feet for real. To the people that said I would love their relationship when I started watching DW you were so right and know me too well 😳

Some of our favourite episodes from 12's run were Listen, Mummy on the Orient express, Heaven Sent and The doctor falls. Though there are a lot of good ones really, all the ones with Missy in them, Deep Breath, Flatline, Oxygen, the heist one, Thin Ice, The pilot, the one with the ghosts underwater, the ones with the pyramid monks, the parts with River, the one with the boxes and Zygons, the last special, all really enjoyable!!

We are also five episodes into S11 and I have to admit that despite our best efforts so far we are not enjoying Chibnall's writing at all 😫 but it's still early so we stay hopeful, maybe it's just a rough start and it will pick up after all the exposition. We will keep going so that we are all caught up by the time the new season starts airing!!

I hope you are all doing well! I am once again apologizing for not replying to asks in ages!! I've been mostly away from social media for months outside of posting every now and then so they keep piling up and it's become intimidating 😫 but I'll get to them soon!!

I also wanted to thank you for all the kind comments and tags on my art and photos, they really keep me going so I'm very grateful!! 😭💖

[scarlet--wiccan]

Don't act dumb? Your account is literally nothing but Roma Virtue signalling. If marvel is such a racist company why interact with it? The information on your page is again incorrect. We are not a tool for you to make yourself feel better and feed your saviour complex. Just weird you really should stop speaking about and on behalf of Roma it's giving obsessed and just the most ignorant type of saviour complex and it's all in the name of marvel we truly exist outside of Marvel but idk if y'all can comprehend that.

This is really extreme and unfair. I don't want to continue this conversation, as it's clear that you're not willing to engage in good faith, and frankly, after years of being clear about my background, I don't feel like I owe anything to an anonymous user who could very well be the exact sort of troll I was just talking about. But I suppose it would be helpful to clarify some things, since nobody ever reads my old posts.

I am a second-generation American of Cale Romani descent. I identify as a white-presenting person of mixed race. I have been consistently clear about this and there are photos of me on this blog. I'm not hiding anything. I am a Marvel fan and a long-time comic book reader. This page started out as a general fandom blog, but because I happen to be gitano, I am particularly invested in Romani characters and speak often about issues of Roma representation. I don't think that's weird or hard to understand, and I do still post about other stuff. I'm not trying to be a savior or spokesperson, I'm just talking about what I know and what matters to me. I don't think that Marvel comics are wholly or irredeemably racist, nor do I think that's a productive way to approach critical consumption. This is a massive literary canon and a reflection of many different aspects of American pop culture, and I prefer to engage with it as such.

People are entitled to have different opinions and feelings about these characters, and I've acknowledged plenty of times that I don't speak for everybody-- I've even expressed anxiety about drawing too much attention to comics when I know there are Roma who're sick of hearing about it! But I don't think that it's uncommon for marginalized people to have complex relationships with flawed or problematic representation. I, personally, like these characters and see value in them, but more than that, I think it's important to initiate critical conversations about them because they're very popular now, and they're going to exist in perpetuity, whether we like it or not.

I often make it a priority to direct those conversations towards actual Romani history, because I want readers to learn more about that and to participate in allyship beyond Marvel fandom. In fact, I've repeatedly said that I think fans' tendency to tokenize these characters is detrimental on all sides, and I do post about Romani issues outside of comics, but again, this is specifically a fandom blog, so that's what I focus on. If that's not getting across to you, either you aren't actually reading my blog and you just decided to bother me unprovoked, or I'm a much worse writer than I thought.

If you don't always agree with me, that's fine, but everything I've said about Romani history and racialization is just verifiable fact. I don't think that I'm wrong to say that whitewashing and erasure are bad, and that if Marvel is going to continue making and adapting stories about Romani characters, we deserve to advocate for ourselves and demand better inclusion. I've never had to speak over or argue with other Romani people about this, because, honestly, the only people who disagree with me on this basic principle are belligerent anons like you! And I know other actual Roma who would agree with me. I have a life, and a relationship with community and culture outside of comics, but you don't see that because you don't know me, and again, this is a fandom-specific blog.

[m00nsbaby]

Pedro Pascal STOLE my GIRLFRIEND!

Marc Spector x F!Reader.

This is literally just a post from reddit that I saw and made me think of jealous Marc lol.

SPKTR:

It all started when we watched "Kingsman: The golden circle." I was interested for the plot and Colin Firth but she found Whiskey to be so much better than Harry Hart. Yes, the traitor cowboy was hotter to her than the badass Kingsman Agent Harry Hart. She said girls always found villains hotter than heroes, I was making a huge fuss over it. Okay, true but it's Colin Firth for God's sake! Days later, I catch her watching "Kingsman: The golden circle." again and says she really wasn't paying attention to the plot and wanted to understand it better. The "plot" to her was Pedro Pascal and his "seductive voice." I didn't get the big appeal when Firth was right there, but whatever, you do you. We usually watch movies when she comes over and she insists on picking the movie one day, I say "Fine, as long as is not Kingsman" thinking her obsession was only caused because of that movie. She puts on this action movie called "Triple frontier." Cool, I love action movies and then PEDRO PASCAL SHOWS UP. I'm sensing a pattern but I quietly observe her reactions when he's on screen. She's giggling, blushing, kicking her feet, the whole shebang whenever he appears and she absolutely loses it during that scene when he speaks spanish and she repeats over and over "I would have folded" NO SHAME. Like, hello? Your boyfriend is right HERE! It takes me a minute to notice she's REPEATING the scene and squealing like a school girl. Her whole face is red by this point and she's just rolling on the bed giggling excitedly, it doesn't end there, though. She starts watching Narcos JUST for Pedro Pascal. It's one thing to watch a movie for an actor but a 3 season show is downright INSANE. She soon forgets I exist and replaces the photo widgets she had of me with Pedro Pascal. That's when she crossed a line. Simping over Pascal I understand but he DOESN'T get to REPLACE ME on her phone like that. Then The Last of Us comes out and never hear the end of it. My girlfriend is a books/movies person and she's never had any interest in videogames but now that "her man", as she's been referring to him for the past week is starring in this NINE EPISODE series about a fungus pandemic, she just HAS to see it. She says it's a good way to catch up on the videogame but we all know the real reason. But fine, we see it and she's so excited the entire time. Seriously, I've never seen him so happy before. So now I'm an idiot who's indulged his girlfriend's obsession with Pedro Pascal for too long and now I'm second to him. But it doesn't end there because WHY WOULD IT END THERE why did nobody warn me about the amount of thirst traps in this series?? Her jaw drop seeing him get aggresive, the words are on the tip of her tongue, I can practically hear her say how much she wants him, so I lean over and whisper in the pettiest tone I could muster "Just fuck him." She gets embarrased and starts giggling nervously while hitting my arm softly saying "Babe, no! What? No" but by her tone it was SO OBVIOUS she was saying "I would if I could." Anyway, we all know Colin Firth is better so count your days Pedro Pascal.

sorry for tagging you in this lol

Mk's tag list :)@ninebluehearts @icreatedthisat317am @onefinnedwonder-fm @shousha133

I couldn't find the original post but here's where I saw it lol <3! https://www.tiktok.com/@requestedreads/video/7279590034729291054?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc&web_id=7179670435260827141

[cementcornfield]

do you like any other ship(s) besides joemarr? i’d like to know more about nfl rpf!

other ships?? besides joe'marr??? those exist??? 😱😱

kidding of course, though you wouldn't know it looking at my blog at times. i DO tend to get very single-minded. but there are lots of great ships in nfl rpf!! many more than i can even pay attention to!

some of my favorites below the cut

bengals ships:

okay so it's really an extension of joe'marr...but joe'marrtee has been HITTING lately oh my god. just the last month and half alone? those three are obsessed with each other and clinging to each other with everything they have at the moment. thinking about them too much hurts my heart!! (god this offseason is going to be stressful!)

treymarr: i talk about them a good amount too lmao but this pro bowl sweethearts couple is just so much fun for me to think about lol. too lazy to link it now but if you go through my trey tag you should be able to find my video of my favorite treymarr moments. it's the teasing and pigtail pulling from big tough guy trey for me!!! the way he steals his candy but can't help but give it back when ja'marr looks at him with his big eyes <3 <3 the way trey wore ja'marr's chain at their first pro bowl together. it's incredibly adorable to me and i need us to extend trey and sign ja'marr this offseason!!

'23 rookies + mike: kia was just talking about how we need a better name for these guys lmao and they've got a point tbh!! what a mouthful. but in a way it's fitting because they certainly are dealing with a mouthful if rumors are to be believed 😏 ANYWAY i just love how quickly the three rookies clicked. how they seem to be inseparable on and off the field <3 the way that yoshi and chase spent the whole summer down in atlanta together <3 and then how QUICKLY mike got involved once he joined the team!! when it's only their second year and his....9th?? in the league. and yet they seem to have the exact same level of maturity hahaha. the really all seem to have the same sense of humor if you check their instagram posts and honestly 4 incredibly weird football guys all finding each other like that? that's love baby.

germaine and bj is not one i talk about as much as they deserve tbh!!! but they actually are the 'and they were roommates' trope!! they've known each other forever, they clearly and obviously love each other. bengals social has filmed them going to the zoo together, they've done some joint interviews, i think there's a video out there of bj driving germaine around his farm like through a bunch of mud?? and then germaine got bj a framed photo of his for christmas?? (bj loves photography!) they are a lot of fun and definitely deserve more love!

non bengals ships

joe'marr + justin if that counts - not counting it as a bengals ship because this is an lsu ship To Me. literally no one who wasn't on that team is going to be able to understand the experience they all had together. and the connection they all had then and STILL have (even if it's a little different now) is just so plain to see. i'm so glad the three of them got to spend time in france together last summer and i'm really hoping it becomes an annual thing <3 plus joe talking about how he wants to win the gold in flag football in LA with justin and ja'marr?? beautiful.

but honestly i think my favorite ship that doesn't involve a bengal (hahaha) has got to be mike/tua. holy shit they just have one of the MOST beautiful relationships i've ever seen. in like, real life!! not even counting shipping (but ofc that is the main focus of this blog lol). just the way that mike came in when everyone had given up on tua (including tua himself) and just had allllll this evidence about how tua was amazing actually. the way he spent that whole first year building tua back up after flores had torn him down. how much FUN they seem to have together. how mike is always joking and flirting and how confused tua was about all of it at first. but he eventually learned his quirky tendencies and started responding in his own soft tua way <3 and then GOD all the tragic shit they've been through together too :( that first (second really) awful concussion during OUR GAME against them. that shit was so scary and every report is that tua was just laying there asking for mike - "where's mike" over and over again holy shit. and then right at the beginning of this season, when we finally thought tua was over all the health scares, and he goes down in another very scary moment and mike is immediately there for him. helping him, guiding him off the field. giving him the most tender and soft kiss i've ever seen on the cheek and then watching him walk off. probably terrified inside but knowing he had a job to do. god. these two really do kill me.

jj/koc is a much less angsty vein than above lmao. this ship is just so Hot and Fun and Silly to me. go through my koc tag (simply because it's shorter than my jj tag) and you should pretty quickly find the Heart Eyes Gif that started it all because oh my goodness. justin!! staring at your coach like that on national tv for all of america and god to see??? have some Couth girl!!! and then you listen to the mic'd ups for both justin and koc and it is literally CONSTANT flirting. these two are completely enamored with each other it's ridiculous!!! and my favorite little headcanon is justin and ja'marr (in a continuous competition! as they do!) just arguing about whose hot tall blonde older QB boyfriend is better :') imagine the double dates lmao.

cj/bryce is a CRAZY ship tbh that my dear friend em has really defined for me over the last two years. oh my god like??? they've been best friends for forever??? they end up being the top 2 QB prospects in the same draft class and are nationally scrutinized/compared/ripped to shreds during the draft process tbh! but this doesn't break them!! draft night!! watching both of their reactions to the other being drafted??? they love each other SO MUCH. but then but thennnnn oh my god they couldn't have had more different rookie years. bryce is selected number 1 but on an awful panthers team. cj number 2 on a texans team that is perfectly situated to GO OFF. and you have to assume that put a strain on their relationship!! suddenly they aren't talking about each other as much, we don't get any offseason content of them together, it's ROUGH. but now look what's happening, they're both coming back to earth around the same time (bryce up from hell and cj down from heaven is the way i mean this). meeting again in the middle. cj able to understand at least some of what bryce went through last year, bryce finally getting his confidence and joy back. i hope this offseason we can get something more from them <3 (em ALSO has this insane theory that keeps proving to be true?? a deal with the devil where one of them can't seem to do well while the other is?? you'll have to check that out because it's WILD)

and then i'm gonna end it with probably my silliest ship which is sauce and justin lmao. just watch them play madden against each other first at the pro bowl live and then over stream a few months later. they are RIDICULOUS the way that they both clearly want to kill each other but are also having the time of their lives. sauce just cannot HELP himself all he wants to do is piss everyone off, justin especially. and justin gets so heated but also isn't stopping. in fact keeps trying to initiate more!!! he wanted to play more with sauce on stream but sauce shut it down because he won! (the game AND getting justin to laugh hysterically. getting justin to actually ask for more. and that's when you gotta leave! stop it! before they get tired of you/too annoyed with you! leave 'em wanting more sauce!) but then on another stream sauce just sitting there watching justin's stream and critiquing it. completely ridiculous lol. oh and right they DO play football professionally don't they. i think if i remember correctly they had a pretty even game against each other. sadly he didn't end up pissing justin off like he did ja'marr (who i'm also convinced he has a crush on. oh sauce and these unavailable hot LSU WRs. why do you set yourself up like this!)

there are definitely more that i'm forgetting right now! but these are the ones i'm most emotionally invested in!! let me know if you have any thoughts or questions about them because despite my blog being 99% joe'marr i DO care about other things i promise!!

[hislittleraincloud]

Old Man Rambling

Yanno, I kinda miss the days of Tumblr where you kids were identifying as inanimate objects. There were kids IDing as kiwis and biscuits. Biscuitkin, kiwikin, shit like that. It kept this place relatively quiet because, well. Inanimate objects don't make much noise. And it was amusing as shit because there was always a teeny tiny part of y'all who knew it was all goddamn bullshit, but you never let the razzing force your masks off. You wanted attention and ya got it. You still kept to yourselves, even though you were thoroughly obsessed with your otherkinship.

But now. Holy Hell.

The current "kids'" personal lives are so hollow and so horrible that they've resorted to policing the lives of people they don't even personally know (celebrities, particularly young Hollywood). The identification is so strong that what they love so obsessively* couldn't possibly be anything else but what and how the heavily biased observer wants to see them as.

It is for that reason why I do sympathize with Ortega, if only a little (she did choose this life, her parents could've stopped it at any time knowing how strange celebrityhood has changed throughout our decades alive). Social media is evil. We did not have this when I was young, when the young Winona Ryder who is being splashed all over my fyp was posing for those photos, we only got to see them on paper, in magazines, bro. We didn't have all of this creepy connectivity where there was a very good chance that a celebrity would see our comments. It just was not like that at all.

So I get it, I get that it's changed and it can be really hard just to be a regular person because everyone has a goddamn video camera in the palm of their hands with videos ready to go online within seconds. It's shitty, and probably one of the things that's killing pro paparazzi (though in some cases it's made them worse); anyone and everyone can get a scoop now.

And if that's the case, why are kids behaving like paparazzi, knowing what the paparazzi did to Princess Diana (and Britney, offering up those umbrella photos out of their context of her situation that hardly anyone really knew about). The Chappell Roan concert footage is the best current example of that (I've removed the one part that I briefly posted as promised), and I've seen the biggest Wenclair accounts pass that shit around here like it's normal to invade a girl's private moments. And in some instances, using Photoshop/AI to gaslight people into believing crap that never happened. It's RPF to the worst degree, and it isn't cool.

*ETA: I started writing this last night before I passed out from the heat, but now I want to go back to the obsessive fan thing (partially bc of my recent experience here). User name redacted because I don't want to give her any more attention:

This ain't cute and not to be normalized. Had a male done this, it would've been seen as creepy.

It's this level of obsession — and the false sense of closeness that social media connectivity brings — that gives the Ortega stans a sense of entitlement over her (personal and professional) life that they do not have a right to influence.

And as someone who has studied and observed adolescent psych for decades, it amazes me to see young ♀️ adolescents behave like stalkers and get a pass for the behavior just because of their gender. Some of the most dangerous stalkers can be female, since they're not always taken as seriously as the males (male stalkers aren't always taken seriously either, so think about how much less female ones are). Jodi Arias, Victoria Rickman, Shayna Hubers, Liz Golyar, Vegas Bray...the list goes on and on.

It's obviously not a direct comparison; I'm not saying that what the kids are doing is necessarily dangerous for the object of obsession (since there is no direct relationship and physical access) or that it even has the potential to get violent (doesn't seem so), but it's not always entirely harmless.

Now, I understand that obsession is a thing with adolescents. I've seen it first hand. One of my favorite films is about the very type of 🏳️‍🌈 obsession that forms between two girls sometimes**, and features Kate Winslet's first screen kiss with a ♀️.

Most of us old farts grew up in an era where acting was acting: Even with the lack of connectivity, we knew Kate Winslet and Lyndskey weren't gay, but we still adored and appreciated the performances. Same goes for Hillary Swank in her Oscar winning role as 'Brandon Teena'; we knew she wasn't a 🏳️‍⚧️man. It was acting. More than half the cast of the original L Word was straight, and there wasn't anything close to this kind of creepy stalker crap back then.

Sadly I think that the more connectivity there is, the less real connectivity happens, and that presents obsessively attached fans with a false sense of security that would crumble if the people they worship turn out to be something contrary to the image in their minds that they've cobbled together from their celebrity's public behavior and works.

I don't think this type of delusion was present with Biscuitkin and Kiwikin. The foodkin did nothin' to anyone but exist, and food is food. The Ortega stans are fucking scary and need to cut it out. It's made fandom a scarier place for celebrities, because the Internet is forever and you're out there showing just how twisted up/potentially obsessive towards people you can be. It may not be embarrassing to you now since you have this false sense of 'community', but out there where y'all actually have to talk to real people and get on with real life crap, this type of behavior wouldn't fly. In 15 years when you're not a pimply, awkward high schooler/early college-aged person, someone might ask you how you spent your teen/high school years when a good chunk of it was scrolling through social media for pics and y/n stories about your favorite actress (and sometimes her co-stars).

[starleska]

Huzzah! Art Fight nears its end, I think. I have survived! As have you!…I hope. I’m pretty sure you survived. <3 I know a lot happened there, but we both did ArtFight stuff! You did stuff! I did stuff! You fought hard! Idk if you’re doing any better or worse than before, and idk if you feel bad about any kind of inactivity, but there’s no need to! You’re alive and that’s what matters! If you want or need to take time away a little longer, you can take as much as you need! I’m sure we all love you and will be here when you’re ready <3

Also, since the “war” is over, or ending, we can go back to drawing whatever we want of whatever quality forever again without any pressure or self-imposed pressure to draw something else goodly! Woe! Art be upon ye!

(…I couldn’t remember where I saw your full lil persona before so I’ve been referencing your tumblr pfp and ArtFight pfp and going by memory sorry-)

…love toaster quality art…Ig that proves my point! Though sending this to myself on discord and screenshotting it may not be a good idea…post art fight delirium my beloved. uh let me just-

SCREAMING!!!! okay okay i have been mulling over how to reply to this for days because i was so just. delighted and overwhelmed with this little blorbo-processing universe you've invented for us!!!! F/O Inc...oh man, what a delightful place to work!!! that really is what it feels like logging into Tumblr Dot Com to yell about some new idiot 😂💖💖💖

but now i'm thinking...what exactly are our jobs? do we do fieldwork? certainly you and i are collectors of f/os, hunting down potential obscure characters for people to get obsessed with...what's the corporate hierarchy here? are our clients other selfshippers, or are they the f/os themselves? i'm cracking up at the idea of it being like one of those matchmaking dating services crossed with a crime drama...Ace Attorney style, people bringing in their woes and desperately hunting for an f/o who'll match them perfectly...!!! 😂😂😂 Client, visibly sweating: "Gosh, I-I never usually do this sort of thing, but...it's been so lonely on my dash recently, and I...I was wondering if you had any new, um...Tumblr Sexymen...to recommend?" You, chain-smoking cigarettes with three hanging out of your mouth: "Sweetheart, you've come to the right place. Take a look at these puppies." You yank a thick file from your drawer and slap it down, open, on the desk. "Now, keep an open mind, toots...but you ever hear about this Once-ler fella?" all of the DETAILS in this art are killing me 🙈🙈🙈 your countless cups of coffee, as if you've been trying to cope with the new freaks i've brought into the office 😭💖💖 the little Employee of the Month photo too, oh my gosh!!! i'm honoured :3c and oh my god the TINY Piers, Ramón and Maxime...!!!!!! FUCK the second i get a new laptop and can draw again i need to add to this universe, thank you for coming up with something so brilliant 🥺💖💖💖 accepting new hires for F/O Inc. today! 😉 and HUGE CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU FOR GETTING TO THE END OF ARTFIGHT FRIEND!!!! 😭💖💖💖 so sorry that July decided to kick me in the metaphorical nuts and i wasn't able to attack you back, but THANK YOU SO MUCH for the wonderful art you made me which i treasure so much 🙈💖💖💖 shortly i'll be compiling all the lovely art i received into a little chart, and i can't wait to show off your work!!! i owe you big time 😉 thank you as well for such a lovely pep talk and all the niceness you've thrown my way 🫂 of course i do feel a bit guilty about needing to take a step back and being so open about the burnout, but it's been a busy month for all of us, haven't it? i think August is going to be really nice and fun :3c anyway this is kickass and i'm so glad to be your colleague at F/O Inc. bahahaha 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[sweetlikehoneystingslikeabee]

I want to hear more about Zero Year Riddler being kind of a loser, please.

Zero Year Riddler is Actually A Nerdy Dork-Ass and I Have Evidence

aka at max ten pictures from the comic books. I apologize now that I had to get selective with photos and that these photos I took myself because I'm too lazy to scan. Includes hcs based on the canon stuff.

TW: Spoilers for Batman: Zero Year also known as Zero Year - Secret City and Zero Year - Dark City

We are going to be jumping around a little with these pictures. So the most basic/stripped down timeline- Edward sets off a massive plot w/ Doctor Death to first black out the City of Gotham while he prepares the Big Guns. Weather balloons filled with toxins to ensure no one is getting in or out of Gotham. He floods the city. Tells the surviving citizens that if they all want to get out, they have to give him a riddle he cannot solve. If you think that last part sounds very folk-lore or fairy tale like, YOU WOULD BE RIGHT. This period where he's setting up this challenge is the titular Zero Year. He is set up inside the Sphinx display in the Gotham History Museum. Batman stops him. onto the actual discussion.

We are first going to start with his introduction. I've discussed this before in a different post but this is meant to tell you multiple things. He has fifteen degrees he's earned. He makes conspiracy theory string boards. He is a dweeb who wears pocket protectors. The important thing to note story wise is that most of the points in this board are important/have a specific role in the story. He's correct about them. They matter. You might be saying "ok Fox/Belle but how does this say he's a nerdy dork-ass?"

look at him. He's described as being "boastful and annoyingly egotistical, but socially he's an egghead." This is not a man who plays well with others. But he genuinely thinks of himself as someone better than everyone else. What do you get? A smokescreen of theatrics, egotism and showing off to hide how socially inept he is.

Next, and sorry the first picture didn't turn out as well as I'd hoped. This is the first meeting of Edward and Bruce Wayne. Of course Edward has already plotted his death. Will try to enact this plot. The page with the snake is a reference to the ancient Egyptian game of Mehen which Edward mentions in passing earlier in the story. Historians currently don't know much about the game other than it's distinctive board- However here it becomes a parallel to Ouroboros. The snake that eats it's own tail. Its known as an alchemy symbol and spiritually represents the unity of all things. Life, Death, Rebirth. In Edward's mind: destruction and rising from ashes aka Gotham in his plans.

The second is post Zero Year, telling the citizens of Gotham his motivations. This is his monologue showing his warped version of the Hero's Journey. The Hero's Journey for those who don't know is a very old archetype on which many fictional stories are all based on (whether they realize it or not.) In it's simplest terms, a hero goes on an adventure. The hero through trauma and hardship, learns a lesson, wins their "boon" and returns home with newfound knowledge that transformed them as a person. Note this sounds kind of similar to the Ouroboros thing, doesn't it?

Edward wants to leave a mark and transform Gotham. Potentially the world. He wants control he never had growing up. He wants all of it.

On the headcanon end... This information combined with his hyperfixation on mythology (mentioned below), this man plays tabletop. Hear me out. God complex. Verbose. Theatrics. Obsession with heroics, the heroes journey and folklore... this man not only plays DnD, he has been a GM countless times. I think he'd play other tabletops as well, but DnD is his bread and butter.

His main race (in traditional) is a gnome because of the intelligence stats. When he does DM/GM, the story is rich and so fucking detailed. He is also mean as hell and will murder all your characters in emotionally devastating ways if you get unlucky. He'll never admit any of this to people he finds cool or too attractive (unless they get to know him first). He has a strong wall up to try and prevent any weakness or vulnerability to show through.

He likes fun facts. Not just about mythology he is the one who spits out statistical data and random fun facts in regular discussion. It's almost compulsive. At another part of the comic where he almost shoots Lucius Fox dead via robot, he states the statistical probability that he was already hit with a bullet, but to reload and shoot again anyways. Then he is in the middle of telling a trivia fact about foxes before Batman comes in to save Lucius.

This feeds into my headcanon that he's neurodivergent. And also was a Jeopardy fanatic as a child. Probably still is. He likes to impress (especially dates) with the knowledge he can pull from seemingly nowhere. Also if you haven't gotten the impression yet, he cannot and will not stop talking. Loves the sound of his own damn voice. You know he's monologued himself to trouble multiple times. Also note how smoothly he's just glossing over his shitty dad/abusive childhood (again.)

Piggybacking on the last point- He has a special interest (read: potentially hyperfixation) on mythology and folklore. On multiple occasions he mentions these stories in passing as an anecdote for the events currently happening around him. Archimedes was a greek mathematician in ancient Sicily. He invented a great many things and would come to be known as one of the leading scientists of classical antiquity. The story Edward references is a rather famous one- Archimedes invented complex pulley systems and was tasked to prove the strength and ingenuity of these pulleys by moving the Syracusia, a luxury cruise ship, in and out of the water.

The second he mentions the story of the Gordian Knot. The tale goes as such: Alexander the Great's time. Whoever could untie the Gordian Knot was said to be destined to rule all of Asia. No one could solve it. The knot was impeccable. It was complex. Alexander the Great showed his great mental genius by doing what no one else had done. He cut the knot. There's more to it but that's the gist. That's the why of why Edward looks to this story and remembers it.

Everything about The Riddler of Zero Year is about proving his intelligence. Creating a name and a culture enveloped with smarts. If we didn't have the lore associated with Egyptian mythology as well, I'd say ancient Greece is his topic of choice but I think he likes all of it. That said, this man likes historical movies, historical texts, museums. If you take him to a museum or any kind of zoo or aquarium, he's going to talk your ear off on what he already knows for at least several hours. Are you impressed? Please be impressed. Tell him how smart he is and praise him like your favorite house cat.

The final pictures with actual analysis. These might seem silly or a rather insignificant detail to zoom in on.

This is him setting off the triggers to flood the city. Note the suitcase. He says this out loud to no one but himself. His own joke that only he gets to laugh at. Then he LITERALLY walks away whistling. A lot of this kind of behavior feeds into him knowing and being so smug about how clever he is. He's watching dozens upon dozens of citizens who have no idea what is going to happen to them, running in fear. And he's focused only on how gleeful he is that it's all coming together.

In the second: this is the final trial. Batman saving the city of Gotham and Riddler getting to have his big villain moment. And from the moment he reveals the lightshow of lasers ready to cut down our hero at will- he begins playing with his cane and hat. To the point that Batman is almost panicked for him to stop and just ask the damn questions.

These both run to one point and that's to him, this is all a game. We don't know this in the story yet, but he has an additional failsafe to blow the city up even if Batman wins (he doesn't expect him to, but he always makes sure to be a step ahead in case). He's lighthearted because, despite his curiosity around Batman and being constantly surprised that Batman keeps surviving, he considers this chess game match and set. His own arrogance supersedes the idea that Batman could be a genuine hero willing to take all the risk to save these people.

Riddler says to "get smart or die." Edward does not expect someone to do just that and more. For these the behaviors are more dorky vs the actual analysis but you get the point.

Bonus: we get the full picture that he constantly has a crown image above his screen in Gotham Square during Zero Year. Sir, Why Are You Like This? A lot of this comes down to: please give him attention he is so desperate for attention and probably physical affection. He's starving for it.

If you actually read through all of this, I'm love you and I hope you're having a fantastic day. Thank you for taking the time to listen to my rambling.

[thekingofcrochet]

Just shy of 30 I drew my own nude portrait…

I'm not new to nude figure drawing. I went to art school after all. And figure drawing courses are the least sexiest thing about art school.

Sometimes the model is moving through poses quickly so you never get to see one area for too long. Sometimes they sit for multiple sessions in the same pose and by the time it's over you may have developed a tense relationship with the back of someone's left knee.

If you fall in love, you've done it wrong. Plain and simple. It's a school child's definition of love - persistence and obsession, a single two-sided coin

But when was the last time you saw yourself as other's see you. I don't mean in a philosophical sense. When your friends take pictures of you, are you happy? or disgruntled? or sad? or bored?

What about when you see those photos? Do you hate what you see?

So far, most of my self portaits have just been that - portrait shots. From the shoulders up, I got really good at drawing my eyes, nose, mouth, ears. I've figured out how to draw glasses and how to get the eyes to look almost the same. At least twice a year I would draw myself. Usually for a class. And then I'd just start doing it because it seemed like a fun thing to do. And what better reference than one's own body.

I was never good at drawing the rest of me - body dysmorphia and body dysphoria created a me that was never me. Mirrors were my enemy. Or a window to a me who didn't exist. Or the me who existed while I was trapped in the mirror.

But then I started getting naked. I put myself on display. For people to look at and think their thoughts. I lavished in the praise and ignored the hatred. What did they know about me? About my body? The eating disorders? The hormone problems? Walking through life tits first, personality second? Who cares what they think. I certainly don't.

So why did I hate my body? Who is making me hate my body?

I chose to remove my facial features and instead draw some flowers. Because if I'm anything, than it's a hypocrite. A beautiful, sexy hypocrite.

If you’ve made it this far, then you should know that I had originally posted this reflection on ko-fi many months ago. But my page has been suspended because I included “censored nudity” which is against the guidelines. They don’t care that I made this work for non-sexual reasons.

So now that’s one less revenue stream for me and my art.

You can support me at any other link while i try to figure out either how to get my page back or if I should switch to Patreon or something

[sizzlingpatrolfox]

Thank you for talking about mijoo cause I just went down a rabbit hole and it snapped me out of being delulu lol. I can't believe army and shippers really convinced us she was married, and now I'm finding out that was a lie and there was more to the story. Also while going through message boards I found out that allegedly, during the 97 liner scandal, they were at a club trying to hook up with girls in their vip room. Now I just feel silly for ever thinking jungkook could be queer 😅 like this man clearly has a type cause mijoo, nain, and chaewon all give off a similar vibe.

Do you believe the rumor about jimin and daeun? Like I was a bit skeptical, but I find it weird that she tries so hard to connect herself to him. It's giving obsessive ex

I've always thought he could be bi, but to believe that he's like GAY 100% gay is a bit too crazy. And I wonder if part of how hard some people push the gay label on him doesn't have to do with all the rumours.

Yes, the very first thing that came out about Jungkook that night of the club in 2020 was a french girl who said Jungkook had bought drinks for her and her friends at the club. If I recall correctly, she posted about it that same night.

I don't believe about Daeun, no. And there's nothing to really talk about because what I'm supposed to do... analyze a freaking carpet? Then there's the fact that ya'll talk about that woman but it's not even present time stuff, it's all allegedly about the past. I don't really know how to make myself understood, but I'll try.

I was talking about taekook once and said how I don't like going back in time to try and figure out something that happened years ago, and that's the same thing. I just can't be bothered to go back three years (in Jimin's life, we're not even talking about my own life) to try and find clues about it. As 2020, 2021, 2022 was going on, there was nothing I saw that would've led me to believe Jimin was in a relationship with her. In fact, 2020 he literally was spending every single day with Jungkook, it's still unclear if Jimin was spending more time in 911 or in the dorms, but they even slept in the same room with him.

After 2020, there was nothing, absolutely nothing in the following years where I thought Jimin could've been living with someone else. If I didn't see it back then I'm certain that I didn't see it because nothing was going on. So, ya'll are too late, even if it somehow it was true, ya'll are just too late.

If I talk about things that happened years ago it's because I was there, and I lived through it. It's not the same to what people are doing saying "see how Jimin was in a relationship in 2020 and we know it because she posted a photo in 2024?" It's too ridiculous. Next time, try to get the rumours as the relationship is still going and have at least one single photo of them in the same room. Otherwise, I just can't be bothered.

This is literally Jimin's first and only relationship rumour, ever, in 10 years. All of the other members have had the same type of rumours, some of them had several, and none of them turned out true or at least nobody could confirm it. I didn't care about those rumours either because same this same that was never "evidence" for me. Namjoon even laughed about it once, posting on instagram the headline and saying it was fake. I remember there was a dog involved, too.

So, that's pretty much it. I don't believe it because first, that's just not me, I don't think "same this" is proof of anything when there's not even proof that Jimin knows her or has even talked to her, ever. Second, because of who initiated the rumours and the timing, it's always conveniently brought up at very certain times. Lastly, because even if the taekookers detectives are right (because it's literally all them), it's too late. I'm not about to revisit history to try and fit something that I never saw and of which there's not proof enough for me to say that it actually happened.

[roadyblr]

NO! DONT. TELL. HIM. HE IS MY HUSBAND AND I WILL NEVER LET GO (me saying this like I haven't said it to 25 other idols..)

this you??? but all jokes aside I'm so proud of myself for taking this beautiful picture from their kindergarten TRICKY HOUSE episode. its beautiful. and the best part is that JUNGHOON IS ACTUALLY THERE ASKFKFKSFSFFJKAFFSK

can I know what ur main is so I can follow?? I don't really mind what kind of blog it is, I just wanna follow

anyway, Haru is one of my obsessions (YECHAN IS STILL FIRST. DONT SAY ANYTHING.) as of right now. like he's so pretty.. and he's so talented. there's this video of nexz singing live and their voices are SO CLEAR!! like they're literally so freaking talented its crazy. AND THE BEST PART IS, theyre 5th gen.

so sorry to be a hater but illit and I've could never (don't use me, I love their music)

back to yechan, on kprofiles his favourite foods are ramen (a no-brainer, who doesn't love ramen), tteok bokki (I love it but I had to search up how to spell it), sushi (another no-brainer) AND THESE LITTLE CRACKER THINGIES THAT ARE SO GOOD WAIT HOLD UP.

THESE THINGS. THESE ARE SO FREAKING GOOD, THEYRE MY WHOLE LIFE (I mean he is but like..) it says on kprofiles its called gorabab??? someone fact check

AND TO MAKE IT EVEN BETTER HIS FAVOURITE DRINKS ARE COKE, BOBA AND TEA!! WE'RE SO ALIKE!! (except one can skate and one cant :D)

also, I played a game today and we won by idk how many. anyways, there is this one girl that plays for that team. her nickname is triple C or CCC because her eyes are so far apart she looks like a chameleon. and during training camps she would wear the same cheetah print shirt like three out of the five days. that translates to Colour-Changing Cheetah. (shes such a pick me like nobody likes her. she reeks of main-character syndrome fr.)

anyways. there was this time she scored a goal during the game and on her way back to the bench she was showing off to her teammates how she did it. (she spun around and shot it. annoying) to be fair we didn't have our regular goalie and this girl has only played goalie like twice in her life.

and she scored twice within the last 20 seconds of the game.. like girl. let it go.

anyways, we won like 13 or 14 to like 7 or something. ME. I SCORED A WHOPPING, drumroll please...

5 goals. :D

it was a great day. and I got to hangout at my teammates house the rest of the day.

(sorry for being a certified yapper)

love ya!!! <3333

YECHAAAA-*gets shot*

i keep saying how much i want new tricky house episodes but that usually means album on the horizon *touches ground* i feel it coming... it's already in motion (sumin spoiled the vibes, and considering they learned choreo for watch out not even a month after trial and error that album is already pre cooked)

also it's @vanumanum 💜!! i've exposed myself on here before for my silly edits but full warning i 9 times out of 10 forget to post but i've been trying to be more active im just dumb (xikers drop more spooky photos so i can edit sh monsters in them)

5th gen actually pulling out a bunch of good groups ("XLOV DEBUT AAAH" i screm) and honestly considering what company their under it's almost expected (jype boy groups eat)

also me, an illit liker, as tick-tack plays in the bg: 🧍but also understandable (this is fine everyone's entitled to opinions/i can't speak for ive i can't speak for 99% of ggs that's not my area)

oh i've had those before! the korean reads as goraebap but take what i say with the biggest grain of salt because it could be read differently but i think i'm close enough

i love when i understand nothing about sports i was a shotput/discus clown that's all i got :> (i played three way soccer and took a ball to the face i was like ACTUALLY this is not my sport andalsoididntgetalongwithsportsplayers-) but you got five goals!! that's like 36-39% of the teams goals so i'm gonna say you carried for funsies and because i have giving blatant favoritism💜

[fuckitalltbh2]

making my own post about ed while actually medically obese.

I've been doing this shit since 11 or younger, my weight went from average to uw but didn't have scales or much photos survive all the time. I almost went the mi@ route even without Internet (mid 20s)

I became medically obese because I developed BED after traumatic events along with psych meds in my early 20s.

I developed full blown anorexia at 22, kick started by going to a dietician that put me on diets that were legit 500 calories. Despite all of my behaviour, I restricted without calories counting and didn't know much. Then I learned about it through "normal ppl" weight loss places and here we are.

I lost weight very fast until I reached 60 kg, from 106 kg to 60 in about 4-5 months.

I recovered for a while at 25, but it was unmonitored and basically a big binge cycle. I went through a fitbro era there, macros obsessed and protein, but the binging got to me.

First of all, everyone will say mean comments. You'll be ashamed to get out of the house and you know it's not in your head. You're actually obese, the number say it, people say it to your face.

Second, when you start restricting. Everyone is happy about your diet. For me it's all I could talk about, excited about my progress, obsessed. No one considered it wrong, they enabled and fueled my behaviour more.

Third, you'd go through different phases of weight loss and different bodies. People will have comments "yeah you're good but your body still has a belly or thighs or whatever, you need to lose more"

Fourth, you'll be praised for your control and refusing food. You're known as the diet person. "I wish I had your control, wish I was that lucky". People will come to you for tips. One triggering moment when I told a fat person at the time while I was skinny aka average, that I lost it in 5 month and they said not fast enough.

Fifth, you're going to deny your ed because it's "not bad enough" despite having all the rot, symptoms, behaviors, everything. Because you're not at your ugw or uw.

Sixth, plateau at an average weight hurts like a mf, hair fell out, heart was aching like crazy, my teeth were damaged from c/s and binging. All that shit.

Seventh. Yes loose skin, lots of it, collapsed stomach muscles, collapsed muscles in your arms. Even if you become ugw, your body will not look like sp0 and you'll feel like shit.

Eighth, god forbids if you decide to recover or enter a binge cycle. God fucking forbids, everyone will bully you. They'd say you lost your control. Pull up old pictures and say how pretty and skinny you were (mother in my case), everyone will do that. Even now, my family still fat shames me, throws around comments I need to diet or hit the gym.

Ninth, tip, keep your fucking clothes and store them. I'm lucky I still had all my old obese clothes because I would have had to buy an entire wardrobe. "it's not gonna be me I'll stay skinny", nope trust me, lies, ed is unpredictable, it's a disease and mental disorder. The @n@ to bed pipeline is real. I don't mean to scare anyone, but I think some of you know this already.

Tenth, again people will notice your relapse and encourage it even if they know about your ed history.

11th, recovery places are toxic as shit. They have attractive to skinny people, lip service, and predatory in the financial sense. Plus, the people are comptetive even there. I rather talk about my recovery with my ed friends that I've known for a while. It's not as triggering. Also, you can recover however you fucking want, there's no script, harm reduce, whatever. You don't have to listen to anyone asides from a therapist if they are right for you . Plus, recovery accounts are restriction focused not mi@ or bed friendly, similar to here in a way, 🤷🏻

For me personally, working on the thoughts and reducing the habits. But I want a lifestyle change to reach an average weight and stay there. All the brain rot still lives, but it's a compromise because I can't cope with still being obese.

[qlventingspace]

Rando anon, sorry, but I just got back into BL fandom. I heard about the poi incident that happened in april I think, and I thought things were okay since Build had a concert recently. If you dont mind, could you tell me what exactly is going on? Unless you were just venting about the past... thanks in advance!

hi human, if you don't mind I'm gonna turn this post into some of a rant, because I'm about to implode. Sorry, it's not because of you, but because I've had enough of people treating other people as some saint idols just because they're actors instead of treating them as FUCKING HUMAN BEINGS. And disclaimer, I am mentally tired. So tired.

(I'm gonna do bit of summary of everything, so if you don't have time skip to next brackets for what's happening now)

To all hell bent on laughing at us and 'proving us wrong': You think some pretty face is gonna make me forget my morals? We've been there, 7 months of hell, every minute of it. Cause when you love someone you WILL make sure you make a very informed decision if you'll continue or not and you WILL sacrifice the time to do it properly.

We turned every information upside down to analyse it properly and find what is the truth and what is fabrication, so my stance is very solid. I'm making an informed decision (unlike all the people that only come to me saying he's in wrong without any proofs, only shouting).

What you could've missed?

Perhaps you missed that it was Build who made himself scarce to the point his family didn't want to leave him alone for a minute in fear of what he might do to himself while Poi was trying to obsessively reach him, provoking him to speak to her, changing her narrative every 5 seconds, happily insulting people around, left and right, including Builds sister for being some lowly single mother because her husband passed away, INCLUDING religion (islam specifically) and sending death threads to fans. Which of their actions screams A Victim and which Abuser? I beg you use your brain for a bit.

Build is the one who waited for subpoena, since Poi was shouting she was at court (she wasn't). Build is the one who went to court with a folder thick with concrete and empirical evidence. BUILD is the one PROVEN INNOCENT BY A COURT.

And POI is the one who ADMITTED TO MAKING THINGS UP.

(now what's happening currently)

Every time Build tries to move on with his life, some low life (you can guess twice who) brings up unverified 'accusations' against him.

He said it himself, if you don't like him, just don't stay in a fandom. Just don't go around spreading more hate and misinformation about him.

He.just.wants.to.live.in.peace.

As I said in my convo with a hater under my latest post: Is leaking private photos okay when it's half naked man? Is leaking private chats okay if it's a man? There's several 'new' accounts spreading his private half naked photos that were taken without his consent or knowledge he's being photographed (taken by Poi). And now the account is spreading chats (not verified) where he badmouths his colleagues and company.

First of all, there is a fake translation of those chats, that is done by (wonder wonder) a completely new burner account (joined to twt this month I think). Secondly, Build only apologized for the chats leaked yesterday (was it noon?) in those he is complaining about unfair treatment he got from his former company (BOC).

Build never left anything for which he was truthfully responsible for go without an apology.

Why is he required to constantly apologize for the fact that HE COMPLAINED TO HIS FRIEND IN HIS PRIVATE CHAT ABOUT UNFAIR TREATMENT AT THE WORKPLACE?

I'm absolutely sure (sarcasm) that if all of your private chats got leaked now you would come out of it as absolute saints.

And then the account continued to publish thai chats with misleading captions, and fake translations, while the actual translations of those chats weren't that bad as the caption wants you to believe.

All in all it's just a normal person venting to his friends about his life and private matters.

Oh and did I tell you about that account threatening Build to leave the entertainment industry or they never stop?

As of today, guess who's again going to court because he's getting continuous harrassment? Build.

Because he's a victim, whose abuser is constantly attacking him and he has no other means to defend himself but the official jurisdiction.

And think what you want, but the lack of action from the company's side while he was under their care, unfair treatment, complicity in assuring he's gonna stay with Poi when he tried to seek a way out, throwing him under bus while he was under their management and also after, playing on both sides.....

I'll let you make up your mind. But there is too many things that just click together and for me: BOC as a company is complicit. In harrassment, in abuse. They are still working with and following Poi.

If you don't wanna see Build as victim, what about Barcode then? She harrassed him. What about Mile and Apo then? SHE HARRASSED THEM.

Yet the company is still working with her, because she has money and power and they have a sinking boat and planned projects.

I said what I said.

That cursed company will never see a damn penny from me ever again.

And someone on twitter said enlightening thing.

Why is it only now, only THIS company that has a problem with Build? While people from all his previous projects (actors, directors) are hyping him up and supporting him?

Build just wants to live his life. He is just a human being, as we all are. We sometimes do weird shit and bad shit and vent to our friends. But because he's public person he needs to be humiliated and treated like shit publicly while if it was you or me we'd just disapear for a week in our room and no repercussions would await us after?

Build is not an abuser. He is proven innocent BY COURT.

All he ever did was that he trusted the wrong people.