#but not the cunning kind

[itsriotmotherfuckers]

Sirius caused the longest hat stall in Hogwarts history when he was sorted, by the way

[feroluce]

So Sampo is canon described as the only person who can travel between the overworld and underground, but it's never actually revealed HOW he gets around.

I'd like to believe part of the reason he's so secretive really is just because of business. One of the best ways to keep your customers is by being the only one to offer something, and Sampo stands to make a pretty nice profit if he's the only one able to smuggle in supplies. Gotta protect the trade routes ☆

BUT the other part is because he's probably one of the only ones that could SURVIVE it. I'd like to think a lot of his routes enter the overworld either in places like Backwater Pass, where it's technically in the city but is overrun by Fragmentum, or on the frontlines, where it's frigid cold and crawling with Silvermane Guards.

If someone manages to get all the way up, and even if they manage to sneak past all of the Guards/monsters and not freeze to death, there's still the possibility of getting caught in the city proper by regular civilians.

And if Cocolia heard word of someone caught in the overworld, I can't imagine there's any way she would just leave that, she separated the halves for a reason. This person would be interrogated, and then the route sealed off, and then the Undergrounders would lose a vital supply route. Sampo has to be extremely careful to not get caught and not be tailed.

And I'm sure he does a lot of shady trading in Belobog proper, but I think a lot of it also comes from him looting the Fragmentum-corroded areas, too. After all, in the Cyrille the Fool quest line, when the trailblazer sees something strange in the Fragmentum, the first person they think to consult is Sampo.

So I love the thought of Sampo being like extremely disciplined and being able to be out there for like days at a time.

Looting is easier in the beginning, but eventually Sampo has to go farther and farther out for supplies. Sometimes he'll be out there for days, and it's not exactly a safe place to sleep, but he can stay awake and alert for absurd amounts of time if he needs to be. Going for 24+ hours isn't unusual for him on a big supply run; Sampo will be awake for a day or two, he'll bring back everything he finds to Natasha, then sleep for a solid 8-12 hours and be back up again. He takes a couple of low key days where he rests or does easy work, then he's ready to plunge into the fray again!

On the rare occasions he sleeps in the Fragmentum, it's not for very long, less than an hour, and Sampo has traps he sets all around him while he sleeps sitting up with daggers in hand. Caelus finds out about this habit the hard way because he gets restless and decides to go explore (I'd like to think with the Stellaron dwelling within him, he's largely immune to any kind of Fragmentum corrosion), and he sees Sampo curled up in a corner, head down. So of course he approaches to see if he's ok, and-

A trap pops and hisses

There's a bright flash of pink

Caelus blinks

His back hits the wooden wall behind him

There's the sound of reverberating metal-on-metal right next to his ear

Caelus blinks again

...and is shocked to suddenly find that Sampo is looming over him, pinning him to the wall, one dagger sunk into the wood and the other blocked by his metal bat.

And they both just stand there for a beat, until Sampo blinks the bleariness out of his unfocused eyes, and then he yawns obnoxiously right in Caelus' face and tells him he shouldn't interrupt people's beauty sleep! How is Sampo supposed to stay so handsome otherwise!?

Caelus only notices shortly thereafter that there's a thin line of blood on his neck, and he belatedly realizes that Sampo really would have taken his head off by pure instinct if he weren't also incredibly quick with his reflexes. No wonder he's the only undergrounder surviving out in the Fragmentum; anything that approaches in his sleep thinking they have easy prey is almost instantly demolished.

[ninicaise]

"why don't we see laurent's schemes in kings rising? why does he act so helpless, like a puppet?" idk maybe because laurent & damen are no longer friends for the entire first half of kings rising so laurent is back to being completely alone and after prince's gambit he has no idea what to do without damen beside him. maybe bc laurent is not actually the domino master of the series. the regent is. maybe bc laurent is (canonically) behind in the game and the only reason he ever had a chance of winning is literally bc not him nor his uncle can ever predict wtf damen is going to do next. this is textual btw i am not making shit up. just as the "captive prince" is both damen and laurent, the "prince's gambit" is both laurent's and damen's gambit.

[peachetteprice]

Born For It | Kyle "Gaz" Garrick

Enter: Rich-boy!Gaz who was never born into wealth, but rather, born for it.

Thankfully, his blagging skills were never subpar, as convincing the wealthiest blonde bimbo at a conference in Fort Lauderdale would have proved tricky had he not mastered the art of running his delicious mouth. It was, in his own words, piss-easy to convince the woman he was 'in love with' that he was, in fact, a very well-off, well-known auditor for numerous major tech companies, and he was, additionally, all too talented at forging the paperwork for a 2024 Kia Stonic in cerulean blue – that certainly did not cost him a month's worth of groceries to rent for two weeks – to prove that it was truly all his. And, goodness, thank the creator that his father was so devoted to owning three gorgeous, pin-striped Italian suits before he passed, otherwise he would have nothing prim and proper to wear on their first, second, third, fourth, and fifth dates! Well, before he devoured her on her velvet couch and stole her hand in marriage, of course.

Naturally, he takes to the role of pompous, spoilt, entitled husband like a moth to a flame, as he has an inordinate ability to stretch the truth with his long Ralph Lauren fleeces tucked at the elbows, VVS diamond-studded watches, and tinted Versace sunglasses.

Oh, but don't be fooled by the crass social act: the man knows a con artist when he sees one.

He doesn't spend long at the country club with a glass of red in hand, talking to Brian and James and Marcus and their wives Tiffany, Tiffany 2, and Tiffany 2.5, respectively, about the recent tax evasion scandal from Johnsons and Co. (and how they all might do it better without getting caught) before he spots you across the outdoor pool on a sun chair: the young, recently wed beauty with ample time left on your wrist to be doing anything with your life other than seduce poor, geriatric, twice-divorcée, once-widowed, thrice-Viagra'd Mr. Shepherd – or, more crucially – the vast riches he carries in those flabby jowls of his, just ripe enough for the taking as soon as that weak heart of his drops him dead in the shower on a cold Tuesday morning, months later.

It's a shame, really, that the old dog didn't put his conversation skills into the will, because it takes Kyle no more than three minutes of ogling to read the smudged guilt and lost desire on your face, and poses, to you, over a kiss on the knuckles and a well-timed whisper into your ear, the question of joining him one day for lunch in his large, supersized, monstrous mansion that hardly gets used by his married-to-her-work-first wife who, herself, would never think of Kyle wishing to screw another woman on the weekends to entertain himself in such a lonely... drab... suburb.

It does perplex you a little a first, especially when you aren't certain why he wants you of all the women at the country club, when every wife, waitress and pool girl would burst open their bras and dangle their naked breasts in his face at just a chance of that silver tongue on their bodies, because he's simply that irresistible.

Not only because he knows your golden secret to greed, and has been known to – again – run that scrumptious mouth of his to anyone he can throw under the bus for another grand or two, but because it's clear to anyone that dear-old Shepherd's cock does nothing for a pretty pussy like yours, and you desperately need to cream over his thick, severing, thigh-splitting one until you cum, to make up for all the flab he wiggles in and around your folds at nine in the evening before he conks out in his silk pyjamas – he has to wake up early to catch the morning run of his favourite radio show, don't you remember?

Though, you do agree that he is irresistible. In fact, you have to.

And you wouldn't tell on Kyle even if you could, even if he didn't have his wife's lawyer on speed-dial, due to that legally-binding, twenty-three page contract locked within a safe in your makeup drawer which clearly states that anything of yours from the inheritence – whenever your old biddie shoots the gun, kicks the bucket or collects his final paycheck, that is – is automatically his, too, as well as the properties in Toulouse, the estate in Dubai, the stocks and shares in Google and Facebook that only ever seem to be going up... oh, and that divine cunt of yours he laps up like a starved dog whenever his wife is away.

| Masterlist |

[dootznbootz]

I think it's kind of funny that people have an Epic!Odysseus design and then they have an Odyssey!Odysseus design because to me, Epic!Odysseus is just Jay.

[passingnights]

I don’t care what story it is, if there’s a small talking fox with infinite wisdom, never ending trust and a love of trickery, I will love them.

The Wizard, The Witch and The Wild One’s Fox

The Little Prince’s Fox

D20 Neverafter’s Fox

The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse’s Fox

All very beloved by me and I’m sure I’m missing a few of them

[stil-lindigo]

So due to the trickery he'd pulled on others, how deserving would you say Cunning was of his fate? (Side note: FUCK, great comic! Had to cuddle a ferret when I read it because it was sad but it was good! Well done!)

thank you anon! and as for whether Cunning deserved his fate, I think that’s up to the reader to decide. You could see it as karmic retribution for his previous actions that Cunning just underestimated his mark this time. Or maybe it’s just tragic, because of all the clues that indicate he’d never had a choice in being lured in by Charity, and that he was humiliated and demeaned before he died. Up to you!

[lionheartedmusings]

also yes q!bad is manipulative but let it be known that q!tina literally knows? that he's a manipulative liar?

i simply feel like we need to give q!tina just a little bit more credit in that interaction (and in general to be completely honest) because she blatantly answered his forest burning metaphor with "i was thinking about starting some fires to help the ecosystem myself"?

yes, she wants to be included and to be alone and feel lost is maddening. q!bad recognises that because he feels the same way, and it's obvious he cares about q!tina a lot, all tests and schemes put aside. he won't *stop* his tests, but hey... if q!tina can be useful and he can help her feel a part of something?? win win!

this is a mess of a post but TL;DR: this whole interaction was quite literally just grey, no black or white to be seen? yes, q!bad is manipulative and devious but have you considered that maybe as long as the people on her off list are good, q!tina doesn't care?

let them be morally grey together!! they both need company!!! let them be awful together!!!!!!

[ice-feast]

This episode has revealed that, yup, Jace is part of the Conspiracy of the season - but I don't think he's the mastermind behind it all. What would Jace gain from all this? His entire character is being chill. Why would he suddenly want responsibility? He intentionally teaches the subject with the least information to teach!

I don't think he's the mastermind.

I think it's Arianwen Abernant.

Ragh didn't just see Jace talking to Kalina. Arianwen was there too.

Everyone, including the Intrepid Heroes, is taking it for granted that Arianwen is still being chased around the Forest of the Nightmare King by a van with hands. But does the Forest of the Nightmare King still even exist? The forest of Sylvaire does, but Cassandra is no longer the Nightmare King. Her forest has become that soft twilit woods Kristen has visited a few times (and now contains a manticore). Even if Arianwen was meant to remain trapped in there (chased by a van with hands), Arianwen's punishment was hardly Cassandra's first priority. Getting new followers and not dying again was very much Cassandra's preoccupation. Arianwen could have escaped.

It's been a while since I watched Sophomore Year, but weren't the Abernants sent to Solace partially to separate Arianwen from her research into the Nameless Goddess? She could have learnt then that the Nameless Goddess had a forgotten wife. Anything the Bad Kids discovered could also have been discovered by Arianwen, an adult woman who didn't have the distractions of school and being a teenager taking her from her research.

What's more, wasn't Arianwen's motivation for helping the Nightmare King having him use his power for vengeance on Falinel? Falinel stripped the Abernants of their position and imprisoned Aelwyn. Arianwen cannot conceive of any of her actions being wrong. ("I was very warm and loving," she tells Adaine, the child she neglected and abandoned, without any trace of doubt. She also killed that guy to get into the Nightmare Forest, so we know she'll kill to achieve her goals, but tbh I find that less revealing than her reaction to Adaine's recounting of the abuse she's suffered.)

And now it's worse! She has no position of power, she has no magic, both her daughters turned on her, and one of those daughters punched Arianwen's husband to death. Isn't that unfair? Isn't that an injustice? Doesn't that make you angry?

If you fail to use one forgotten god in your revenge plot, you can always try again...

[sorrbet]

Have been playing a lot of ZZZ and I think the main headcanon I’ve made is Nicole being older than she says she is.

Mostly coming from how Anby didn’t have a last name when she met her so Nicole gave Anby her last name and in a sense taking care and mothering all of the Cunning Hares even if they get rowdy with their antics especially Billy.

So she’s a boss and like an older sister figure that’s almost motherly in the way she’s willing to go full stops to take care of Anby and the others especially since I’m pretty she herself was an orphan but just a thought.

[athinginmotion]

Smiling women and girls in art history

Mère Poussepin Seated at a Table, Gwen John, oil on canvas, 1915-20

Portrait of the Artist’s Sisters Playing Chess, Sofonisba Anguissola, oil on canvas, 1555

Portrait of a Young Woman, Frans Hals, oil on canvas, 1655

Portrait of Isabella Brandt, chalk on paper, Peter Paul Rubens, 1620

Self-Portrait with a Camellia Branch, Paula Modersohn-Becker, oil on canvas, 1907

Self-Portrait with her Daughter, Elisabeth Vigée-Lebrun, oil on canvas, 1786

[aokuni]

griffinjo and ravenkuna

[cuntstable]

was talking about this with a mutual just now but it really is so funny how dio was such a failure in his god complex at the end of the day that arguably the best lesson he ever taught pucci as his evil mentour was ”ok dont do what i did which basically was just fuck around and do drugs and have sex in my mansion because i got nothing done vis a vis Heaven Plan and ultimately got killed by the joestars” and pucci took that to heart so strongly that instead of becoming another fail slut he turned into a straight edge celibate priest and ended up doing 99.9% of the heaven plan and sucessfully killing all his enemies like LOL

[mostlikelytofangirl]

Thinking of post-sunshot au where the Wen were allowed to live (and re-group) for some reason, where JGS somehow manages to majorly fuck with JGY's head/brainwash him, and WRH who has been after JGY for revenge and yoinks him, but suddently he has the brainwashed JGY in his hands and he's like "This is Not Right what THE FUCK happened to my Yao'er"

(JGS should flee the jianghu while he has time xD)

Ohhh what an unpleasant surprise D:

But it's also funny to imagine WRH ready to ennact his revenge on JGY after finally getting his hands on him, only to find out about the change and doing a 180, all "wait what happened to my Yao'er???"

A nice 'who did this to you' moment bc even if he considers JGY his enemy now, he still respects him ;u;

[sketching-shark]

Starting Journey to the West assuming its the story about a silly goofy monkey going on monster-of-the-week adventures with his friends:

Reading about Sun "was-definitely-a-warlord" Wukong smashing the upteenth person's head into a meat patty but a few chapters in:

[zsofiarosebud]

ok but manu chao was right