#but no. bc im not as important or as pressing or as ill or as whatever as them
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krispiecake · 1 year ago
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sorry just. can i be insane a second? can i be completely honest but also batshit for a really quick second?
#im getting absolutely furious at the fact that staff are just casually having a convo like laughing and gossiping#maybe like 40ft away from me or something#while im sat her alone in the garden obviously not doing well and theyre just… having a giggle#like theyve asked me ONCE the entire fucking day if im alright its fucking insane#and yes i know things feel more intense and more targeted bc im triggered and have a pd ect ect ect#but this js MY blog and im sick of making disclaimers for how i feel so im not going to anymore#bc im sat here in the freezing cold bc if i stay in my flat im gonna try and end it#but i cant sit in the louge bc theres a meeting going on#what fucking meeting needs to be happening 10 at night#and like lets say it does#why is it not happening in their flat#you know a private place that doesnt impact anyone elses care or needs#like i know they have a living room too like its not fair theyve been using the communal lounge all day and all night for now the 4th day#in a fucking row#other people need it too#but no. bc im not as important or as pressing or as ill or as whatever as them#i have to sit alone with no support cold in the fucking garden#great im sooooo glad that everyone is being treated equally and that everyones needs are being taken into consideration 👍👍👍👍👍#i just feel like screaming and crying and throwing shit and hurting people im so sick of referring to a fucking text book its not changing#ANYTHING like i still have to deal with it all but now its prolonged and now its worse and now i dont even get any results#im so fucking sick of all of this why cant i just be fucking normal#i dont get why i have to be stuck with this stupid pd and all my other shit bc of other ppls actions and i dont even get a fucking APOLOGY?#im so fucking exhausted and i just dont wanna do this shit anymore#update not even the crisis team gives enough of a shit to fucking pick up the stupid phone lol#its a sign i suppose
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hisaame · 1 year ago
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OK kinda a specific request but like- could you do a Scara x fem!reader or gn!reader where he’s like overworking himself due to his studies(probably bc of his mommy issues sjsjks) and reader is like comforting and convincing him to go to sleep w her/them since it was late? Modern au ofc. And basically Scaramouche is being all stingy about it like “no I���m fine” and stuff but eventually goes to bed because of readers sweet words haha
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Of m y god this ones adorablw i love soft scara THANK UU!!
╰⪼ “fine, for you." ♡
╰ — scaramoucheˊˊ」
╎『modern au!ˎˎ
[fluff] — 『warnings: workaholic scara, soft scara again (i swear these arent real warnings), cursing, scara mommy issues, readers pronouns arent used, but feminine body type』
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It has already been a long week for you and Scaramouche, school was a pain in the ass, as well was studying. You would usually be studying at the schools library with friends, or mainly with your boyfriend, Scaramouche. But even with you being done with everything, he continued studying, alone.
It was late at night, around one in the morning, you had just finished some chores since you didn't have much to do, and you weren't tired then. But now you were, all the chores you did worn you out. You thought your lover jad already gone to sleep or is possibly waiting for you, but once you entered your twos' bedroom with a tired yawn, you saw Scaramouche still at the desk, focused.
'he's still studying?..' you thought to yourself, slowly walking over to your lover who seemed too focused to even notice your there. But with a gentle pat on his shoulder, he flinched slightly, then turned to look at you with tired eyes. "[yn]? Why aren't you in bed?" he asked, rubbing his eyes as his other hand still held a pen between his slender fingers.
"Shouldn't i be asking you the same thing?" you replied with a raised eyebrow, looking at Scaramouches own eyes that seemed to already have eyebags under them, his eyelids drooping as he forced himself to stay awake. "shit," he mumbled "you go, ill join you later. I have to finish this shit." with a groan, he turned back to studying, his eyes trying to soak in every word he reads from the book, and writing the more important things down.
You sighed, a bit frustrated now. "Scaramouche, please, finish it tomorrow, you look like you're barely awake." you pat his head, running your fingers through his dark indigo locks. You just loved him too much to let him overwork himself like this, he needs to be getting enough sleep. "Cant you fucking see i cant? This is important, alright? Do you think i wanna fucking do this either?" he groaned, frustrated with how long he's studied, and barely able to focus with his sleepiness. But seeing how he was a bit too mean to you, he mumbled "... Shit, im sorry. Love, please just go to bed, im fine."
he rubbed his eyes yet again as you replied "not without you. If im going to sleep right now, ill make sure you're right beside me.", you crossed your arms below your chest, glaring at your boyfriend. Why must you be so persistent? He cant even get his studies done with you like this. "I told you im fine, plus ill be in bed soon anyway." he put his hand on your hip, still reading over the words he's trying to memorize. His hand caressed your hip, then went around your thighs to pull you close. "There will be no later, come on." you groaned, too worried about your overworked lover.
"mmh, so soft..." the male mumbled, pressing his head against your stomach, to where he could reach since he was sitting down and you were standing up. He used your stomach as a head rest while reading. His hand still caressed your plush thighs. "Yeah? U can hug me all you want when we're in bed." you smirked, seeing how this was actually working. He narrowed his eyes, very tempted. After all, he could just finish this tomorrow, right? No big deal? Tomorrow he promises himself to study with you.
"fucking fine... Lets go. You better keep your word." he finally gave up, standing up lazily as the both of you walked to bed. He quite literally threw himself on the bed while you followed by doing it the.. safer way. He groaned as soon as he stretched his back, cramped from being in the same position. Now he gets his reward. You.
He lazily wrapped his arms around you, nuzzling his face into your neck, all while you held him in your arms. You did scold him a little for overworking himself, to which he only giggled and said "oops".
And he fell asleep almost immediately...
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mrsnancywheeler · 10 months ago
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IM SO SORRY THIS ONE IS LONG ILL LEAVE YOU ALONE SOON YOU JUST GIVE ME BRAIN WORMS
I’m back on my Finnick silliness
Finnick who sits by his sweet girl (yes. She was his sweet girl again) while she lays unconscious after her games. The overwhelming feeling of guilt, relief, exhaustion, and mourning.
Relief because his sweet girl (yes his sweet girl, she was finally his sweet girl again) was alive and breathing in front of him. Relief because after 2 years, 2 years that felt like a lifetime, Finnick was finally able to hold his sweet girl again. He was able to hold her hand, kiss her face, give her the adoration and delicacy she deserved.
Exhaustion because seeing her in the arena was probably the most emotionally draining things he’s had to go through. The fear of her getting hurt, or worse, dying ate away at him. The jealousy and silent rage he felt watching her kiss and hold Conway. The fear and anxiety he felt when he realized Conway would kill you. He didn’t sleep a wink, every moment he could he was looking at her. He was getting her sponsors (watching her get hypothermia was probably the worst thing he’s been through, and that’s saying something)
Mourning because he mourns the person she was. He knows she won’t be the same. He knows the fear, anxiety, the depression, the guilt, everything that comes out of the games. He mourned the carefree girl he loved, but that didn’t matter, he needed to be there for his sweet girl.
Yet as she lied there there must have been a subtle anger he began to feel because imagine if he began to hear talks about his sweet girls desirability. How people would have loved to spend just a night with her, or perhaps both him and her if they had the chance.
He probably realized he would be able to hold her once more but soon he wouldn’t be the only one. And that? That is probably what truly broke his heart.
Okay…bye
I MEAN IT WITH MY FULL CHEST WHEN I SAY YOU DON'T HAVE TO LEAVE ME ALONE BC I LOVE TALKING ABOUT THIS STUFF SM LIKE I'M SO GRATEFUL FOR YOU POOKIE
tw trafficking, violence, death
so at the beginning of midnight rain finnick was so prickly and like multiple times reader mentions that he's trying to be too much like a mentor, he's comforting her but it's not the same until after he tells her about what snow does to so-called "desirable" victors because that's him breaking down his walls
and I'm just thinking about what a tumultuous time that was for their relationship because they're so young and have both been through so much trauma and he has his sweet girl back but at what cost
and he feels so responsible that any of this happened to you, so he has to do his best now to mentor you for the press after and the eventual victors tour. he gets to hold you, to kiss you, to be with you, but he has to make sure you know the importance of keeping up performances. so their's a lull where you feel different because of what's happened that compounded with how you feel like he's different too, he's keeping things from you, and is still guarded
like there's 6 years between reader winning her games and the version we see in the lakes and the river, so much more healing and bonding, so much love strengthened. so the finnick who tries to be there for reader after her games and is scared to tell her about her fate learns so much to become the finnick trying to bring reader back in the lakes.
but yes finnick would've been exhausted during your games, he can't eat if you're starving or ill or hurt, or if you're trying to convince conway you love him. he can't sleep when you could die at any time. this man would go through lengths to make sure you had the best sponsors, it didn't matter how many more customers he had to take it it meant you would survive. and then your fate was nearly out of his control when the hypothermia hit. something people can die so quickly of and he feels like he'd truly snap if that happened, he spends every sponsor dollar to get you that blanket, and is so grateful that marlowe knows how to take care of you. because you're his sweet girl, freezing and shivering in the rain. then there's the trauma reader has related too the cold and rain after that, he's so grateful he's always warm because he can end your chills with his touch. but it takes you so long to leave the house in the rain even when warm and you still hate it.
and yes, you've changed so much. there's less impulsivity, less dreams of a life out of your grasp, maybe because you have it now, but you also have no hope for anything but misery. you're more forelorn, there's less walls you put up, you just cry, but you still worry more about him then you to yourself which crushes him. his poor sweet girl, so traumatized, so cold all the time, and so utterly distracted by wanting to help him instead
oh my god, when finnick was doing whatever he could to get you sponsors I can imagine all the people that invested because they saw your interview and wanted you. all the people who'd say, "well if I sponsor her, I'd definitely get my money's worth." with a chuckle to their friends, so disgusting, who laughed back
"those tears would be even prettier in person"
"I would love to see what else they mouth could do"
and finnick's blood is boiling, but he needs the money so his sweet girl can live. he feels so guilty for it when you're with him though, it's one of the reasons he doesn't tell you about it for so long. you'll be safe as long as he keeps you out of reality, which he can't do forever.
and yes people definitely want both you and finnick at some point, I mean the beloved couple from district 4 people can't get enough from and he doesn't know if it's better or worse that way. because then you have to watch each other take the rougher treatment but he can also be there for each other.
especially early on he can clean you up, put you back together if you're both wanted, before the tragedy that it's commonplace hits and you learn to take care of yourself because so often you're alone.
he hates that other people want you that way, that other people will see you that way because he knows that if neither of you were forced to be in a place like this you'd just want each other and just have each other so completely. but his sweet girl is being forced to perform and sold to the highest bitter which will always make him sick and angry. because he just wants to love his sweet girl.
sorry this is kind of all over the place lmao
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bitchfitch · 2 months ago
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sorry if my asks overwhelmed you, i just thought it was important to point out. the poll itself is not important, but it is important that you understand that your poll exposes a subtle antiblack belief about slavery that you (and many others) hold. i would hope that someone who truly believes that "BLM" would be receptive to considering why distinguishing between slavery and immigration is actually extremely important (even in casual, mostly non-consequential instances like this.) im not pressed for an answer, but i truly do hope you can bring yourself to learn more about why this distinction is key to understanding black history and black oppression
nah it's cool and I understand where you're coming from. if I could edit the poll to add more nuance options (bc it's still a poll about the most recent immigration, so someone with slave ancestors but who's mom is from like, Canada would still probably need/want an option seperate from the second one and so on and so- It was a badly designed poll, it needed more nuance in general you're smart, you know what I mean) but tunglr doesn't like, let me do that or delete it from other people's blogs you know? And at this point making another one kinda seems like a job for someone who's better at poll design than I am
So it's a big Shrug situation I guess is the point, it sucks and I'm sorry it upset you and others and ill be attempting to do better in the future, but there's nothing I can like. do about it in the here in now.
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subwayfloorlicker1978 · 3 months ago
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tadc works better in the medium that it unintentionally conveyed itself as
okay. you’re probably reading this title thinking “but subwayfloorlicker1978… what IS the medium in question????” okay the medium in question is being a lore filled mysterious series with twists and turns and having an emphasis on twists and turns just as much as its characters.
now. this baffles me a little bit bc even though one could get that exact idea of tadc just by watching the first episode (and the fandom ITSELF literally got that impression. i mean its even evident in the fanmade aus.) gooseworx made a twitter post a few months ago that apparently tadc is made up of. and i quote. 95% character depth/stuff/etc and like 5% of lore. which is… hm.
which also baffled me! because my GOD was there a lot of lore foreshadowing and spooky (if you want to call it that.) stuff throughout episode 1. like WAY too much of it, especially if your main goal of tadc is to have it be a series centered heavily on the characters. not saying you can’t have background plot things going on, but like… 95%? seriously? i’m definitely praying she hadn’t entirely thought out that ratio before pressing the post button.
and that’s why tadc unintentionally comes across as a series with super deep lore, literally to the point where i’ve seen certain people unironically call it a horror series (which is wrong btw. even if you’re taking the c&a scenes + caine’s suspicious moments into account). it quite literally spends like 1/3 of its main scenes in episode 1 putting SO much emphasis on the c&a lore and the abstraction and everything else.
and the thing is. i dont entirely blame gooseworx for this. obviously it would be very important to flesh out the environment/world that the characters are in during the first episode (LITERALLY your first impression), which obviously includes locations like the lore office area pomni was in or the cellar where caine banishes all of the crazy people to go to. (oh and also even the topic of abstraction itself via kaufmo) but like..... there’s a reason why tadc has a game theory episode.
i’ve said this before and ill say it again. tadc and the entire “digital circus” thing and the implementation of vr headsets + lore into the story is ONLY an excuse for gooseworx to tell a compelling story about compelling characters in a cartoony wacky environment. its basically a guaranteed way for the viewers to actually see these goofy characters in a humanoid manner. however… you can’t just implement characters with these vr headset backstories and existential themes without it sounding entirely ominous. AND you can’t just drop a huge bombshell regarding the lore of the show and WHY the vr stuff happened and then go on twitter and say that its 95% about the characters.
and with the direction of the cellar and office scenes.. im not sure if it’s even possible for someone to make a clean cut resolution to the lore tidbits while still fulfilling the “5%” lore thing and not having it come off as giving off the wrong expectations. the direction of these scenes is SO intense like. some of these camera shots clearly put emphasis on small little details and the tone of these scenes pale so much in comparison to previous scenes that it catches you so off guard.
which is what makes them very well written! however they pack so much content and foreshadowing into themselves that its such a far fetched thing to say that only 5% of lore will make up tadc. that combined with the prospect of past lives. and also with the clear foreshadowing of jax being a morally corrupt person. what about the extremely heavy motifs of exit doors? there’s no way THATS going to just be gone after episode 1. goose, what do you MEAN there’s going to be corpse imagery? all of this ties into each other. lore and tone tie into each other too. come on.
but these aspects can definitely be used to craft a great story. WITH character arcs and character deep dives throughout episodes. gravity falls literally nailed this. and theoretically tadc could too. emphasis on theoretically.
also if the “memory loss” thing was actually canon and not something the fandom thought was canon (again reasonable misinterpretation because obviously if you hear pomni say “HOLY FLIP I FORGOT MY OWN NAME!!!” you’re going to assume she forgot everything else.) that would also work well along with the theoretical lore stuff if it was more emphasized. literally think of the vast opportunities for foreshadowing. maybe pomni finds out something about the other characters via revisiting the office that THEY can’t remember. maybe do something with like… reflexes and muscle memory or something related to “the mind forgets but the body remembers”. maybe use it as a plot point in relation to jax’s keys or his weirdly implied secret or something. IDK! i just think a lore and plot driven story in this environment combined with character things (50/50…) would be marginally more interesting than what we will be given.
okay one more pet peeve in relation to this before i go. deep breath……. i really hate the cartoonish body language of the main human cast. GO AHEAD BOO ME. THROW TOMATOES AT ME. LET ME EXPLAIN OKAY.
one piece of media that i think does a GREAT job when it comes to utilizing body language in storytelling is duck season. it clearly humanizes the guy in the suit by giving him certain habits that seem undoubtedly human and make him feel very… alive. like whenever he smokes a cigarette but then quickly puts it out when the player gets near him bc he’s startled and needs to keep up a facade. like THAT. that’s what strikes me as a human behavior.
so if goose’s goal would be to humanize these “cartoon” characters… realistic body language that clashes with their digital circus designs would be a perfect way to make them stick out in comparison to the npcs or caine and bring out the fact that they’re humans in an environment curated by nonhumans. it would also help a little more with tadc’s target demographic problem i think? the characters having little humanoid habits would make it seem a little more mature i think and would also go well with my idea of theoretical lore-focused tadc. not saying 20 year olds CANT be into pieces of media that have bright colors and are very cartoony. im just saying. there’s a reason why there’s so much content slop of tadc.
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narwhalandchill · 9 months ago
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hsr 2.1 kit leaks
ok idk how but even w the preliminary aventurine kit leaks i didnt register before seeing a comment on how he would actually just shred in herta+himeko FUA teams for PF too and im just? obsessed actually i Love this
like PF is already in that weird place where sustains are kinda good still but kinda useless but aventurine being an actual FUA sub dps in addition to his shielding is just? so fucking good and will go so well with the never ending follow up after follow up death spiral that himeko and herta inherently bring to PF it should be a massacre 💀💀 i cant wait
anyway his kit looks sick i rly love how its designed. ACTUAL sub dps potential in a sustain finally 😭😭 and how much crit rate (40%) he gets just from reaching 3600 def is just? so delicious. obviously the fact that he will want crit, def, spd and possibly eff res too means you kinda need to invest hard into his build to rly get the most out of him but i love that blonde fucker so. yeah ill commit. i farmed my ass off for my fu xuan to be as stacked as she is i Will do it again 🫡🫡
the eff res hes giving to the team is actually massive too ?? CC immunity to himself when his passive effect is up? shields on skill no ult dependency and shield stacking on teammates being attacked and FUAs (and like. hes not dependent on FUA teams lmao its just going to boost him) just like that???
AND hes fast as fuck somehow like what 😭😭😭😭 bro looks stacked as hell i hope he stays strong. aventurine with that 106 speed rly out there running from the consequences of his antics 🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️🏃‍♂️💀
anyway wow im hype for this bastard i Cannot wait for his animations
as for acheron im. somewhat interested? but not like too pressed abt it for now. her stacking mechanic seems interesting and ive already seen the asset leaks for her red ultimate state (which is like 700% better than her base design) but if you only see that design for a v short time idk how much itll motivate me to get her.
the lack of LC options definitely hurts like. all i realistically have for her is s3 GNSW but thats on kafka rn. ig if i got acheron i prolly wouldnt be running them at the same time but its still food for thought ig
also she really copied neuvillettes homework for that nihility team passive HSJSJSKSKF idk how i feel abt it like w our current cast it kinda feels pretty tricky to genuinely get a strong team going for an actual max stack team for acheron. like run her with pela and what? guinaifen? ig we will see what shes all abt
ig i just dont feel as much of an incentive for a lightning dps for now w kafka but eh i might go for acheron still. i do have a guarantee tho so it might be nice to save it for aventurine straight up bc then i could maybe go for his LC since it gets him even more sub dps potential but who knows
ig only gripe w aventurine (which isnt that big of deal rly) is the current lack of FUA charas like idm building ratio eventually even having daniel (and them having such heavy synergy is very funny. renheng could never 💀) n i could see myself maybe getting topaz even if im not a huge fan of her character (tho i do think shes well written; my mixed feelings r a result of her being complex) but idk. i hope we get more leaks for upcoming FUA charas.
obviously theres xueyi but her FUAs arent That frequent and unironically i wouldnt Want someone like aventurine w his likely frequent FUAs on her team eating away the toughness bar from her so itd only really work against enemies who are quantum weak but not imaginary. but worth thinking abt still. at least herta n himeko will be a guaranteed PF synergy for him so thats hype
and most important of all: def mainstat with double crit we are so back. relics with double crit that half rolled into def we are so back. etc etc etc
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bonesandthebees · 1 year ago
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I got a little too excited when reading rose and
so it took me a while to work thru the chapter since I write my comments as I read and I decided not to repeat everything started in the thats important to learn about the characters bc that would be almost the whole chapter so i saved it for my analysis here, but I kept getting lost in a cycle of too many thoughts and not much reading about the characters and everything going on oops
time to gather the base info we have (im telling myself analysing this is practising for my literature classes so im technically doing stuff for school when in fact im procrastinating stuff for school, ill do it after this I promise I just need to get this out of my head)
wilbur:
- studying to be the next consil and phil is giving him some lesson, but it seems hes only now going to get fully introduced to all the inner workings
- the ferronnière: hes basically constantly aware of it, both physically (keeps checking he has it) and mentally (aware of his position and controlling his actions, the metaphor of ferronnière pressing on his head as the pressure being put on him) which isnt really healthy but theres not really another option
also he keeps making sure the ferronnière is visible whenever he needs to be respected and we saw a guard doubt him before they saw the ferronnière so its not just a feeling but the ferronnière actually gives him respect and wilbur himself doesnt really have any
- his relationship with phil is as can be expected, phil is not a bad dad, he needs to prepare wilbur to survive in court, but he might be a bit too focused on that + his duties as consil and that results in very strict and bit distant parenting
from his fear of phil not telling him about the announcement and the flinch when called his full name you can see that wilbur is very afraid of disappointing phil, bc in the past that probably meant something like shouting and he was probably called wilum at those times
but its not that phil doesnt care, hes making sure wilbur will be able to be a good consil and I believe it when he says hes taking care of their family (which is just sandduo, or maybe techno too?) and so far he looks satisfied with wilbur, proud even (me when phil is proud of wilbur in any universe bdhdhdjjfjen)
- hes really close friends with niki, since childhood, and there is deep trust between them, with wilbur letting niki even touch his ferronnière, something very personal and important, sharing fidgeting with their rings....
they plan to hopefully rule together (which is not at all unrealistic in their situation) but it wont be able to work the way it has so far, the way they imagine it, already with the strain of wils promise to phil and more will surely com, niki will learn about wilbur not telling her everything eventually and idk how shell take it
im not saying their friendship couldnt work im just afraid it wont survive bc theyll keep trying to hold it up to their childhood standards which isnt possible in this situation and I predict a falling out maybe becoming enemies even
- we dont see much of his relationship with quackity and the tension of niki vs q with wilbur on nikis side is ever present, but theyre still friends
when quackity arrived at the palace they were all still kids and while they did know about the competition going on but they probably had some classes together and I assume wilbur and niki were there only other kids in an adequate position to play with so theres nothing weird about the friendship
also I wouldnt be surprised if phil encouraged it, it was him who told wil to keep his chances open on all fronts
they also both have mutual respect
theres also this undertone to their conversation that is just so tntduo of them
1/2
wilbur's ferronnière plays a rather symbolic role in the story. it's important to wilbur because it's his status symbol. it's the thing that, in his mind, gives him power. that's why he's constantly aware of it. that's why he's constantly adjusting it. it's representative of his position as the son of the consil and everything that comes with it
phil definitely isn't a bad dad in this, but he's not a great one either. he and wilbur have such a complex relationship I'm so excited to really dig into it. phil deeply cares about wilbur and wants the best for him, but wilbur is terrified of disappointing his father. phil sometimes sets his expectations too high, and wilbur scrambles to try and reach goalposts set out too far. but phil is still proud of his son, and just wants to see him thrive.
niki and wilbur's friendship certainly goes through a lot in this story... I'll say that
oh yeah phil 100% encouraged wilbur's friendship with quackity. they have a very... unique relationship i'll say. they're also childhood friends like he and niki are, but they're not as close in some ways and, in a sense, they're closer in other ways. you'll see what i mean later lmao
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butterscotch-brigade · 2 years ago
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Can we see the Violetshine quote list
ASKLDJSALKJDAS SURE!!! (for context anon is talking abt an ask i sent to @/wc-confessions talking abt violetshine warriorcats where i mentioned i have a quote list for her LMAOOO)
this list is a combination of quotes said by her and quotes relating to her!! just stuff that rly hit me in the mentally ill kinnie brain aksljkldjf (putting under the cut to avoid this post getting unnecessarily long LOL. also all the quotes r screenshots but bc tumblr doesnt let u post more than 10 pics im gonna write em all down manually lol)
EDIT: HI SO UH. I HIT THE CHARACTER LIMIT WHILE I WAS WRITING THESE DOWN ASKJDSKL SO THIS LIST IS INCOMPLETE OOPS SORRY. BUT U GET THE IDEA
Besides, Ratscar's words were still gnawing at Violetkit too sharply to allow her to concentrate on Littlecloud. She's not really one of us, is she? She'd heard the skinny, dark brown elder's meow as she passed the elders' den that morning. He was talking about me.
Darktail stared at her. "What's it like living with Clan cats when you know you're an outsider?"
She tried not to remember how lonely she felt in the Clan. How Pinenose's kits ignored her. How she wasn't allowed near Grassheart's kits in case she passed on an infection. "They try to make me feel welcome." Her breath caught in her throat. Don't they? Darktail leaned closer. "And yet you don't."
I'm not wanted here. I never truly was.
Twigpaw only comes to see me when she wants something. She hasn't tried to find me in the four moons since I left. Hasn't she been worried about me? She huffed to herself. She thinks her needs are more important than anyone else's.
Anger surged through her. Did no cat want her? She'd spent her life being passed around by other cats. First Alderpaw had taken her from her mother's nest. Then Rowanstar had snatched her from ThunderClan. Then Needletail had taken her to the rogues. This was the first time she'd had any choice in the matter, and she was choosing ShadowClan. They were lucky!
She searched Violetpaw's gaze for a reaction, but Violetpaw seemed unmoved. Pity swamped her. When had Violetpaw stopped expecting to be loved?
"Oh, Twigpaw." Sympathy flooded Violetpaw's gaze. "You always want to be close to some cat." "Don't you?" Twigpaw frowned, puzzled. "I guess I just didn't think it was possible."
"Let's never forget we have each other. We're kin, and that's stronger than being Clanmates or denmates. We'll always be close. Nothing will ever change that."
She didn't understand. Twigpaw had said she wanted to be close to her. They'd talked about being sisters--how that was more important than anything. You made me trust you!
"You can't leave!" she wailed. Twigpaw stared at her from among her Clanmates. "I can't stay." Why not? Fury surged through Violetpaw. Why had Twigpaw begged to stay close if she was just going to leave?
Violetpaw bit into her mouse, stung by Twigpaw's words. Violetpaw has always been sensitive. Her sister hadn't meant them meanly but it felt like a criticism.
Violetpaw glanced back at him. Talking about Pebbleshine seemed to have made him happy, even though she was dead. Was that how it was when you lost someone you loved? Her thoughts drifted to Needletail. Even thinking of her friend made Violetpaw's chest tighten with grief. I could never talk about Needletail happily. Not after what happened.
"You're abandoning me again!"
"You left me when we were in ShadowClan. And you're leaving me now. All for your precious ThunderClan! What's so special about them? They're just a bunch of meddling know-it-alls. Why do you want to be with them instead of me?"
"I don't care!" Violetshine hissed. "I don't care if you're not happy! What about me? Why am I never allowed to be happy?" Her eyes rounded as though she realized what she'd said. Her body shook. She dropped her gaze. "I'm sorry," she mumbled. "I just believed that everything was finally going to be the way I dreamed it would be."
Hawkwing pressed against them, soothing Violetshine with a gentle stroke of his tail. "Twigpaw is right," he meowed softly. "We will always be kin. We'll miss Twigpaw, but isn't it better to know she's found where she belongs than to live with her knowing she wishes she were somewhere else?" Violetshine lifted her glistening gaze. "I just wish she wanted to be with us," she mewed thickly.
He'll probably decide to move on, she told herself, trying to ignore the hollow feeling in her chest. Just one more cat who leaves me behind, whether he means to or not.
"He is," Violetshine admitted. "A bit like you. Except he follows through."
Twigpaw gasped, stung by her sister's words. "Look," she meowed, "I'm sorry about leaving SkyClan, but I just didn't belong there, as much as I wanted to." When there was no response from Violetshine, she asked, "Haven't you ever felt that way?" "More times than I would have liked," Violetshine sighed.
"This is for Needletail!"
Anger surged in Twigbranch's chest. "But you can't leave me!" She glared at Violetshine. "How can you go after all we've been through?" Violetshine stared back at her in surprise. "But you left me, over and over."
Rootpaw had heard stories about Darktail and his Kin, and how they had nearly destroyed ShadowClan. And he knew that for a while his mother had been part of the Kin, and that she had eventually helped to destroy it. But Violetshine had always refused to talk about it. Too raw, too painful, Tree had explained to him and Needlepaw.
"I can't do it," she meowed. "I worked too hard to find my kin. I could never leave Hawkwing."
"But if Bramblestar is violet toward other cats, especially those in his own Clan - cats he is supposed to care for - then he must be stopped." Her voice shook a little as she added, "I learned about that from Darktail."
Rootpaw stared at his mother. She must feel very strongly to mention Darktail. Normally she never talks about that part of her life.
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greeds · 1 year ago
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by popular request @fruitcube JDJSKFHKD this is what im using rn and how often i use them!
face wash: wash oil cleanser by wildcraft
this is the only oil cleanser ive tried so far and i loveeee it its super gentle but also does a rly great job at cleansing. it also removes makeup and wont clog ur pores. after massaging the oil into my face i remove it gently with a warm damp face cloth. might try the oil cleanser from old soul soap company bc i already get my face cream and shampoo and soap from there so like!!!
exfoliator: buff face and body scrub by wildcraft
i exfoliate every couple days right after washing with the oil cleanser. nothing much else to say ahdjhsjfjd
face cream: face cream by old soul soap company
until recently i was using a cream by wildcraft but i found it didnt absorb into my skin that good and left a greasy feel (it was the one for combo/oily skin!). i am soooo happy w this cream from old soap its got great ingredients and im obsessed w how it feels on my skin. its good for all skin types and is super affordable
eye cream: renew eye serum and spot treatment by wildcraft
as much as i enjoy this product idk if ill repurchase bc im trying to simplify my skincare routine due to no money and also its just a bit insane how we r expected to follow like a ten step routine daily like hello thats exhausting and also its important to give your skin a rest bestie she knows what shes doing, all you need to do is help her out a lil
notes: i have dry skin and depression so i dont wash my face every day, ill wash it every 2-3 days at most, and never in the morning. on evenings i dont wash, i press a warm damp towel to my face, pat dry, and apply face cream. personally i think its been good for my skin to give it a break while also maintaining a bit of consistency!
wildcraft is an indigenous owned skincare company, and both wildcraft and old soul soap company are dedicated to making small batch and affordable products with natural ingredients and low waste packaging. they make their products in ontario, canada. i buy old soul from shopify to offset carbon emissions
i recommend these products, but i also recommend doing a lil research into small natural skincare companies in your area that could use your support! or hell learn to make your own natural skincare....! its fun learning about different ingredients and what they can do for you!! ok bye
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pithyorangecurd · 2 years ago
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Banh Mi
Banh mi is a nice easy on the go meal with very little work to it. It's main components are flavored meats, pate, mayo, pickled veg, chilis, fresh herb, and crispy veg.
Im not a fan of pate, just because im sensitive to nose feel, so when I make banh mi I don't add it. For the bread its things like baguette, focaccia, or any other crispy outside soft inside breads like it. Using thinner breads like regular white bread will offset the flavors, and tend to rip apart when eating because of the amount of veg. Foccacia is most available to me because we use it at work, so its what I usually go for. For the bread you toast it lightly with a mixture of mayo sriracha and worchestershire sauce.
The pickled veg can either be had on hand or made on the fly, whatever veg you have around just put in a jar with a cup of water, a fourth cup of rice wine, tbs of sugar and salt, add any other spices you prefer with pickling. I have a pickling blend that comes premixed but if I were pressed to say what I actually like it would be bay leaf, peppercorn, mustard seed, and coriander. Leave that for an hour and bobs your uncle, on the fly pickled veg, just be sure to chop it thinly.
Fresh veg is things like lettuce, cucumber, bean sprout, predominantly watery textured veg. <- not how people describe these things but its how i see it in my heart. Just slice to preference and add it, i like to lay out my lettuce in sheets and take all my fresh and pickled veg and make wraps like that, to layer the sanwich with. Just for cleanliness.
Herbs and chilis are any chili to preference, i know birds eye is good and etc etc but im texas boy girl so im always partial to jalapeno. I roast mine (just turn on the stove and put it straight on the burner. Turn it when you hear it crackling until theres some char all the way around it) bc it brings out the sweetness of it, and i like to snack on them while i work. Yum. Uhmmm basic herbs tho. Cilantro, green onion, you can add mint or basil but I have a preference towards basil.
The meat can be any kind of meat you want, but I like to do a sweet heat pork with mine.
Sweet Pork:
Boil water on the stove, while I goes to temp thinly slice pork, put it in the water and let it boil for a minute. Drain in strainer and rinse, let sit to dry, while that dries put a pan on the stove, let heat on mid high for a few minutes, add sugar and fully caramelize. Add pork, soy sauce, dark soy sauce, and shaoxing wine. It should be 2:1:6 in your ratio, so. Idk? On that? I just eyeball it. Toss it to coat, add a pinch of five spice if you have it, toss to coat, add half a cup of water cover and leave it alone for five minutes, uncover and let reduce to desired consistency. Stoves and heats can differ so be sure to check it, if you think it should go covered longer then go for it, and thickening may very.
^ that is basically a stolen and reutilized hong shau rou recipe, but i think its rly nice. Typically used with pork belly it really works well with a lot of pork in general, and give a sort of sweet sticky coating that I really appreciate.
That said, its any flavorful meat, whatever you have on hand so long as its prepared in a flavorful manner, ive done a couple different things but find that I just rly do like sweet pork. If you want quick easy recipes for meats to check the market of things id recommend my mommy [not fr] souped up recipes. She does a great job explaining how to use things, why you do them, and the importance of certain foods and dishes.
I wouldnt worry about using chinese recipes to a viet dish, im like. Working on some quesaburria rn and when I finish eating these, ill save some meat and freese the rest and make the quesaburria meat into banh mi in a couple days when I want it again. So like :shrug:. All that to say, banh mi is just smth you throw together when youre hungry, there are staples, and things to replace, and change for taste, but like just do your thang, she's just a sandwich.
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pinkseas · 2 years ago
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[parasocial bestie] going by quaggyday's ask if that's ok to intercept- but tbh i agree with that perspective too!! like gosh if anything it's actually a really nice depiction when it comes to defining how xiao's karmic debt works in a realistic sense. cus like, to me in my dumb poopoo terms, that karma is the residual corrupted power from the dead gods yeah? and this comes from either those that are stronger than him or not. what lumine can or cannot get rid of with her purification abilities depends too, and even for her she doesnt know the extent that this unknown ability provides since the start (since it's pretty sudden but useful trait when treating dvalin)
there's plenty of interpretations and fics that get me a lil pressed that ppl wants his karmic debt to ~~disappear completely~~ for a happy end, when how i personally see things it doesnt need to be the case bc its all about his growth. not that xiao needs to be in constant suffering when he already is, still, but that highlights so much of the importance of his support system, the people who can guide him and help lessen the pain with whatever they can manage. and it doesnt have to center to lumine too, which is another common thing that gets me a lil icky in their stories that she's the only person who can save him (and other ppl with the purification ability, which i dont need to mention who).
putting a difference of whats inside karma, between the gods power and chronic pain as an effect is super good and is what i thought of too!! and true as heck that it's something xiao's body has been accustomed to and even if the corruption chips away bit by bit, it doesnt completely rid of whats already damaged and even then, healing comes so slow for an adeptus. especially if the source being dead gods of higher power. this is something his siblings couldnt overcome long enough in their lifespan, and what xiao is still trying to push back (or accept it, and in turn he suffers more of its effects). so like!!! it just makes sense this way imo
i love pondering of his karmic debt being a metaphor of chronic illness cus man is he fighting so hard for it, and the clock always ticks down for him faster than anyone, even as an immortal. which is sad as hell, and we all copiums together how to at least make it a lil easier for xiao yknow. explodes too
"when it comes to defining how xiao's karmic debt works in a realistic sense" real!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! god and with lumine not knowing the extent of her own ability,, and yeah no like. in my perfect world the karmic debt is very under control and no longer agonizing or life threatening but i dont think i could ever believe it going away Completely, and i think that if it DID vanish completely itd be a huge disservice to. everyone involved, xiao included. no he does not deserve to be in pain 24/7 but this is something hes willingly accepted and carried with him for so long, something he probably feels has shaped him, i just. idk itd feel so fucking Weird for it to just magically be completely gone ?? it does something and sends a message i cant figure out how to put into words, as opposed to being able to live with it and in spite of it and show that you dont need to be ""cured"" just to be able to exist and be content and supported and loved.
"the clock always ticks down for him faster than anyone, even as an immortal." IM GOING TO SOB THIS HITS SO HARD AND HURTS SO BAD GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDD what if we exploded Together. what then.
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ventilation4thesoul · 2 months ago
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so, po texted me today and asked for us to get the chance to talk tonight. he was very to the point, she didnt really say a lot which was shocking since they were the one to initatie? but ok i guess, were keeping our distance. They apologized for thursday and for cutting it off, and said it wasnt because i didnt remeber wht they said, it was bc they had other feelinsg from before in our session and had a lot of weird feelings going on, which i can relate to. She wanted to share the score cards we made, but i said i wasnt ready / didnt want to do that. I felt like it would have amde things worse, or raise more questions and negative feelings, which seemed to upset po since they wanted to share them, but like ultimately if i say no you cant press them onto me. i respect your boundaries and so you must respect mine. that is what happens lol. but regardless- we did agreee to share the 3 best moments with each other. mine were in a lot more detail (no suprise lol) but 2 of the moments po chose were really interesting to me.
th first one was from our second (i think?? maaybe third) date at the arcade, and how me taking care of him and comforting them with their fucked up knee made them feel safe, cared for, and like they could be vulnerable with me. the secon one was actually about saturday night, how we had a miscommunication and how later we talked about it, and left each other alone so po coud process his feelings, and that made po feel optimistic about how far we had gone as a couple.
The last one was the least suprsing, i knew he was gonna put this one lol. it was about the first petplay party last acfi, and how well it went and how happy he was to do it. i still have mixed feelings about that party but i did really enjoy it, and i know how important it was to Po.
he left off with "love you, see you Thursday" so i said "i love you too. can i tell you again tomorrow?" and he just replied with "sure" which doesnt make me feel good, but oh well. at least i got a "love you" out of it. Compared to nothing, ill take it.
ALSO MY DBT BOOK GOT SENT TO SWEET CADDIES INSTEAD OF HERE UGH so po's brining it with a few of my other things (idk what those could even be tbh) for me on thursday. pissed about the book bc i wanted to start on that TODAY but oh well. i think i should wait till friday to actually do it since therapy with po is going to be hella draining i bet. but hopefully not, we'll see i supose.
tomorrow im still going out with julianne, and i also wanna do a release ritual since its the eclipse starting technically! excited for that, and excited to keep moving forward with healing.
for right now, i am doing good. Tomorrow will be good to, i know it.
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moved-2-coyotejone-s · 3 years ago
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oh my god zhongli talks so fucking much
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lynnthefrenchtoast · 3 years ago
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🌱reading fanfic reccs
so. i made a post abt my favourite fanfics and asked for reccomendations. and i can say with 100% certainty these reccs DID. NOT. DISSAPOINT.
so ill be posting my thoughts after i finish every fic and hopefully we can brainrot tgt
⚠️: i dont believe in unsolicited criticism so this isnt a 'judging fics' thing. its more like 'omg this is so cool let me scream abt it'
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in pitch dark i go walking in your landscape by snowbrigade
• i love the headcanon that the pearl galley is an..., aha,, bc one of my fav fics also includes it (unsure what fic it was but its probably Set in Stone by seredemia)
• HUTAO CONTENT WOOHOO
• e-escort childe??? im listening.
• "He wasn’t a good person, not in the slightest, but it was sickening to prey on the vulnerable." SEE WE STAN MORALLY GOOD MASS GENOCIDERS
• th-the way they describe zhongli god i mean we all know hes pretty but gOSH- IN A WHITE DRESS SHIRT?? WITH COR LAPIS JEWELRY?? MANZ I DONT EVEN DESCRIBE THE OUTFITS IN MY WRITING BC IM UNCREATIVE
• "exposing the salacious curvature of his legs." the writing feels erotic even though its not a dirty scene smhdirnr i aspire to be able to write like this////
• THE TENSION. thetensionthetensionthetension- also: gambling? not good. childe and zhongli gambling tgt in fiction? yesyesyesyesyes
• "Zhongli wondered what his eyes betrayed about himself." god. what an incredible line.
• "but a human-sized lucky charm isn’t convenient. The purpose of a charm is to carry it around, correct? One couldn’t reasonably carry another person around all the time."
"You could with dedication,"
• *lynn is filled with dedication*
• (thats an undertale reference)
•“Maybe I do, but ask me if I mean it with everyone.” 
“Do you mean it with everyone?”
“No, but I mean it with you,” 
....SORRY ID SIMPLY PASS AWAY
• “I’m a detective, with the Wangsheng Detective Agency.” AND EVERYONE CLAPPED!!!
• slightly embarrassed for childe telling a lie to the man himself but the TENSION. TENSIONTENSIONTENSION- makes up for it.
• "was sort of cute, honestly, in part because of how impartial he’d appeared most of the time." ZHONGLI POUTING. CUTE.
• “I do not believe I am that mysterious or handsome, so you can just call me Zhongli.”
“Humble mysterious handsome detective then,”
yall think youd do so good in a mafia au but the moment he says smn like this to me its game over hes won im giving him my info
• the deadness of childe behind his playful facade is something i need more emphasis on in zhongchi fics.
• “You say I’m bad, but who keeps paying for me?”
“Arrogance isn’t a pretty look.”
“You’re one to talk.”
hes going to be important. hes going to be unlikeable, i know.
• ...BUT HE HAS BLUE EYES HOW AM I NOT SUPPOSED TO LIKE HIM
• blue is my favourite color black is my favourite hair color HE HAS BOTH.
• "my camellia." bye. yea. vortex, his name was?? yea hes mine now.
• side note; i has to go back and check the fic for vortex's pronouns bc i didnt wanna assume then i realized.... hes literally a book character how would i be assuming hE HAS NO FACE LYNN
• “C’mon, you stared at me enough the other night to know my body’s in great shape.”
Zhongli curled the hand he was resting against into a fist, pressing his cheek to his knuckles. “I was not staring at you.” 
• sure xiansheng, sure.
• "He wondered, was it an innate inclination to distrust? Or life experience? His myriad of scars, mysterious lines tugging at Zhongli’s curiosity, made him inclined to believe it was the latter."
the innate curiosity to want to see someone as who they really are. MMM.
• "“Did you rest well last night?” Zhongli asked, an innocent question which made Childe pause, calculating some hidden meaning."
genuine consideration for my wellbeing? oh no. *pulls out wedding ring*💍🧎
• “Believe it or not, this is me being gentle,” *COUGH* *COUGH* HEAR THAT?? ITS LYNNS SELF RESPECT- FLYING OUT THE WINDOW
• "-Zhongli imploringly to call off his attack dog"
CHILDE AS ZHONGLIS ATTACK DOG MAKES SO MUCH SENSE AGAGGAHSDH
• “Let’s get some food, shall we? I know a good place.” EMOTIONAL ATTACHMENT TIME.
• "And you cannot hold a pair of chopsticks."
"I can hold them."
"Not properly." 
mood.
• im chinese and i also cant hold chopsticks
• “So with chopsticks, how am I supposed to eat rice?” He looked between the utensils and his bowl of rice as if he were figuring out a math equation. “Do I just… pick it up one piece at a time?”
Zhongli bit the inside of his cheek, and nodded stiffly. “Yes. Try it out.”
• zhongli, you true menace.
• theory right now: vortex is gonna be a part of the san flore gang.
• “if I recall correctly, you said you enjoyed those.” THEYRE SO CUTE
• "Am I not the epitome of caution?"
"No," Zhongli answered immediately, blunt as a hammer. "It’s selfish, perhaps even egocentric, but I feel responsible for your well-being since I allowed you into the investigation."
genuine consideration for my wellbeing? oh no *pulls out a second, more expensive wedding ring* 💍💍🧎
• THEORY AGAIN: VORTEX IS GONNA BE THE LEADER OF THE SAN FLORE GANG AND THE ONE WHO KILLED HAVRIA
• update: i was wrong abt the leader thing. THE HAVRIA THING MAYBE?? LIYUE QIXING??
• "Zhongli continued, far, far gentler than Childe would have been with himself." a detail. a tiny detail but wow.
• "He almost wished Zhongli would take his forearm in his hands and snap it in half, just to feel something familiar."
..you ok bestie-
• "he looked away politely as Childe changed into it, as if he didn’t work in a brothel where it was his job to be ogled. " TREATING PPL WITH BASIC RESPECT IS THE FIRST STEP TO GET THEM TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU GOOD JOB ZHONGLI
• "Cute, said a part of his brain, which he promptly dismissed, while another voice wanted to chide him into wearing clothes properly." ZHONGLIIIIIII
• the hotpot scene. ITS SO GOOD THE DIALOGUE THE WRITING THE CHOPSTICKS THE REX LAPIS THE FINALLY ADDRESSING CHILDES MYSTERIOUSNESS
• "This was nice. It made Zhongli's stomach twist."
• and
• "Havria was a vegetarian."
• amazing sentences.
• THAT GOODBYE SCENE WAS BRILLIANT. WITH CHILDE FLIRTING JUST BEFORE SAYING GOODBYE. AND WITH ZHONGLI WATCHING HIS FIGURE ALL THE WAY UNTIL HE DISSAPEARS. AND AND AND.
• i could literally feel what it felt like as you left your friend's house and soaked in the silence
• like that mix of 'woo im tired' and 'oh. its quiet.' TRANSLATED PERFECTLY
• "until he stood undeniably alone." see this line is perfect because 'alone' is obvious. 'alone' doesnt say much. when you say 'undeniably alone' it tells a little bit of a story: that zhongli is in denial of his loneliness.
• and that, i think, is the kind of writer i wish i could be
• "The hands in the mirror were covered in blood, sticky and red, heavy rivulets dripping down his wrists. The thick blood seeped into every crevice of his hands, stained beneath his fingernails. It kept dripping. He would drown in it. Even if he washed his hands again, he would not be clean."
• ...that imagery OW.
• "I mean, it's what a person is. Alive. Or dead. Or they’re you and get to be both alive and dead, but you’re a unique case.” THATS SO HUTAO TO SAY I LOVE HER
• ...ITS NOT FINISHED????
• BRO ITS SO GOOD BUT IT HASNT BEEN UPDATED IN SO LONG CRAP
..and thats where the notes end. PFFT
all in all, very much enjoyed it. thank you for the recc, SEND ME MORE THATS A DEMAND
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jovialjuggernaut-draws · 2 years ago
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Heyo! 14 and 17 for the fanfic writer asks?
14) What is something you wrote in a fic that you're hoping readers picked up on but don't know if they did? What is something that you're excited that readers did pick up on?
oh man i am Constantly putting Little Details in there....
for Guidance (zukka soulmate au) i had an entire reoccuring Theme with a pressed panda lily that was a metaphor for their relationship for the first 2 books that folks Did pick up on pieces of- im hoping to (if i ever manage to write the finale) remember to put in a bit about zuko growing a garden of panda lilies for sokka near the fire palace
christ, though, i dont remember anything i didnt already babble about in authors' notes for riddlebat fics, id have to reread things to point out specifics-
ummmm.
oh! i was really excited how many people picked up on my hints about the True Culprit in Bruceswap, that was very fun! esp the comments from folks who guessed it early and then second-guessed themselves lmaooo
Bleeding had several little Moments that will be fun for re-readers, but i didnt expect anyone to pick up on the Hints the first time, they were Deliberately Obtuse and mostly for my own amusement at the time
anyway, yeah! if you think youre overthinking something in a fic of mine, there Is a possibility its a Deliberate Detail! ill do Subtle stuff that compliments the Outright stuff all the time! just bc i think its fun lmao it takes me A While to write things and the Little Stuff gives me Small Goals while i work toward the Big Goal
17) Do you have any WIPs that you can tell us about? What are you most excited for in your WIP?
oh man now that i finished Bleeding im Between WIPs.....
the only Work i have In Progress is Vibe Knight right now (which... i think ive mentioned before.)
which is an Arkham Knight hornyfic im writing for sigma
i had gotten Stuck on it after writing the Buildup and need to rehaul it to make it flow better (Very important for hornyfic, gotta get readers In The Mood)
i have a whole List on my phone of fic ideas to work on, but Ideally they all stay relatively short. Bleeding got a Bit out of hand
edit: OH thats the other thing from Bleeding i hoped folks would pick up on and no one did- the title itself!!
Bleeding is a double-duty play on both the obvious (lots of blood in a vampire au) and the way the past is Bleeding into the present! the name is based on the Bleeding Effect from the Assassin's Creed games- so for anyone whos played those, thats what i have in mind Visually for that fic!!
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m4rkiza · 4 years ago
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pile of headcanons
bunch of raihan/leon headcanon nonsense from my twit*r
theres alot under the cut, warning : its cheesy, also, i headcanon raihan calling leon "bubu"
Raihan is really good at baking and leon is great at cooking savory & spicy food, raihan likes spicy food and leon likes baked goods, they complete each other
Leon so thick and firm he'd be so good to hug and raihan took advantage of that, holding his bubu until leon complains or whine, yknow when ur pet looks so cute and u hug them, like that
leon contacts name on raihans phone is like "♥💖my bubu♥💕", but raihans contact name on leons phone is "Raihan" with capital R
raihan complained about it, showed leons contact name on his phone, leon is surprised bc he thought his contact name on raihans phone is just "Leon" or "Lee"
then leon changes rai's contact name too "🥰raihoney💖
leon doesnt look like the guy who'd be extra on hair and skin treatment, the reason his hair and skin (especially his hair) is unbearably soft and shiny is bc raihan kept reminding him to do so (and buying it)
sometimes leon act spoiled so raihan will do an entire haircare for him
yes raihan do it bc he loves leon unconditionally and he thinks leon deserves it
raihan has a dirty mouth and uses every swear word but for some reasons, around leon all he can say is "jerk" "ugly" and "dumb"
raihan does that bc all he remember when hes with leon is pet names and how-to-coo-and-woo-your-boyfriend
raihan being leons moral compass feels fitting, not bc leon is dumb but bc leon himself is swallowed by his own title and got the hero complex, making him selfless and have a hard time to say no
raihan is there to "what the fuck are you thinking, dont do that baby, you'll die"
but leon seems stubborn yes? he wont listen if people just say "no", he'd ask the reason why, and if the said person doesnt give a clear answer, he leaves but raihan always tries to explain him in full description, short & long lasting damage, consequence etc
so obviously leon listens, and as time goes by, raihan is.. his moral compass, in a way
raihan playfully growls while squeezing leons body parts but its definitely not so playful in leons mind
raihan always ask leon to wear his freshly-washed-hoodie at sunday so when he go to work at monday, his hoodie will smell like leon
raihans laugh is like "aha haha haha *low volume wheeze* phew heehee" and leon got a laugh that can trigger an earthquake
Raihan sneeze like a kitten while leon sneeze like a buldozer
Leon muffles his laugh by hugging raihan so it wont surprise anyone around them
leon demanding affection from raihan by giving him stupid empty threats
leon : Kiss me or ill
raihan : u will what
leon : i-i will shrink your hoodie and make it mine
raihan : no, now come here bubu
In reality, leon doesnt need to do "things" to get raihans attention, raihan told him he can just ask or "just sit on my lap or tug my shirt and ill cuddle and kiss you till the next day", but leons ego is too high for that so he does stupid shit instead
raihan is very loved by leons family bc surprisingly hes able to stop leon and hop from fighting
if u ask how, raihan simply pick up leon up and walk away
aihan is the only guy who leon will listen too and got called as the "champion tamer"
but all raihan do is just
raihan : bubu, no
leon : no..?
raihan : leon. no
leon : no...
then nag him softly while explaining the consequences, sometimes short and long term effect it depends on the situation
leon is stubborn, so it took sometime to convince him that his plan or an action he almost took to partake is very impulsive or doesnt give a good result
the thing is leon is not stupid, infact hes quite brilliant, therefore its hard to convince him if a person who tries to stop him doesnt have a similiar mind like he is, but thankfully theres raihan
for some reasons raihan is able to found leon in any occasion so the league staff ALWAYS calls him whenever leons gone
league staff : mr rai-
raihan : is it leon
league staff : yes
raihan : im on my way
leon likes to ask raihan for hairbands bc he kept losing them
raihan : bubu, isnt this your third time asking for them this week
leon : ....yes..?
raihan spoiling leon bc he feels he wants to make up for him, bc he wasnt available near leon when fought eternatus
leon follows raihan everywhere in the winter and kept pressing himself to him, whenever raihan question whats wrong leon just looked him in the eye and "im warming you up"
leon is small by raihans perspective but he hugs leon tight anyway
raihan is possessive of leon hes THAT hot, charismatic yet very adorable, leon is the one who keeps his chin up and soothe his fears, and hes the champion, everyone wants the champion, u think he'll let go that easily? no, never
and leon is probably possessive too, raihan is a hot nerd, affectionate and gentle, hes the one who push him to his best, the one who also stops him for doing too much, hes his source of comfort and he wont let go and wont let anyone take his raihan away from him for sure
10 years of friendship and healthy rivalry means 10 years of being on each others live, being one of the biggest contributor and supporter for the other, who pushes to the limit yet stopping when one is too close to the edge of the cliff
no matter if its platonic or romantic, they wont let anyone take their rival, friend and lover away that easy, you wont let anyone try to take away one of the important and huge part of your life
raihan big, so hes the big spoon, he loves cooing right at leons ears and kissing the back of his neck, shoulders and sometimes reaches forward to press a sloppy wet kiss to leons cheek
leon crying to raihan when he founds out raihan smokes when hes stressed out, and begging the other to stop and talk to him instead or cope with healthier way
raihan doesnt need an alarm clock to wake him up, leons just need to grin and say "good morning!" its so bright it WILL wake him up
raihan and leon lives together and since then the outfit leon has on his wardrobe is a collection of formal tailored outfits and his battle tower outift, some booty shorts and work out clothing, and obviously underwear and socks.the rest he just stole from raihan
especially t-shirts, hoodies, and jacket, raihan seeing him walking and opening his wardrobe after shower is such a common occurence that he doesnt even need to ask anymore
raihan looks like the type who carries lipbalm and hand cream in his hoodie pocket, he carries 2, 1 cocoa lipbalm for him and honey lipbalm for leon. whenever he met leon, he applies the lip balm on him, it becomes habit that leon even raise his chin up for raihan
leon can sleep alone fine, but when he woke up he felt groggy,but if he slept on top of raihan he'd woke up like he had a perfect 8 hours sleep even tho he slept for only 5 hours
raihan is a heavy sleeper but waking up with leon glued to his chest/back make his whole day better,especially when he woke up to leon peppering his face with kisses to wake him up
raihan being lowkey flustered and overwhelmed by leons beauty/cuteness/sexiness/everything while leon is being clingy and acting spoiled around him
leon cant be serious around raihan, when he saw the gym leader,he automatically let his guard down infront of him, changing from champion leon to leon from postwick, all giddy and happy
leon unzips his champion outfit and once raihan heard the zipping sound he zooms to leon to plant his face between leons chest
if leon wants attention from raihan he will do various things from holding his arm and press his head to raihans shoulders,sitting on his lap and loop his arm around raihans neck,hugging him from the front and put on a cute face
but if raihan wants attention he just, hug leon from behind,put his head on leons shoulder and doesnt let go until leon does SOMETHING
leon has been taking care of others for so long,so when raihan takes care of him ,its a new,yet quite familiar feeling.
its hard to accept since he felt bad about receiving the attention,but raihan kept doing it until leon tend to act spoiled around him
raihan always kiss leons forehead before he sleeps,when raihan is away, he has the urge to videocall raihan so he can coo him to sleep,but hes too embarrassed to do it
he thought abt that and raihan suddenly videocalling him,its noon on the region he visited, and hes like "heeeey, i just want to say good night to my beloved!! good night leon,sweet dreams,sorry bc i cant kiss your forehead but ill kiss u 10x more when im back"
leon was shocked and stared to his camera "lee? fuck,is the connection that bad-" and leon stuttered "n-no! i was surprised...thank you darling, have fun and stay safe okay?"
"of course! dont stay up thinking abt me for too long,i love you so much bubu,good night!
"..good afternoon raihoney,i love you too" leon stayed up for the next 20 minutes rolling around the bed screaming
raihan actually helps leon on taking care of his dragons, which made leons dragonmons actingspoiled around raihan,and sometimes leon thinks that his dragons loves raihan more than him
raihan plays with his dragonmon as if hes playing with a yamper,calling them "cute little babywubby" and playing with their hands,kissing their foreheads and lays with them on the floor,and of course leon joins in by laying on top or next to raihan
even leon have seen raihan carrying his dragapult like a baby with a baby axew hugging his legs, raihan is legit a dragon pokemon magnet
raihan has a habit of cooing or complimenting at leon even when hes doing the simplest thing ever and leon feels giddy like a 5 y.o everytime raihan does it
can u imagine how many pictures of leon raihan have on his phone,its probably more than 1000, he takes picture of leon as if hes a baby pokemon
leon comes to raihans place at 2 am without any warning,i mean raihan DID gave him a spare key so, raihans flat is HIS flat too,and there he goes,going to the bedroom and slip himself under the duvet,crawling to sleep closer to raihan
at first raihan is SO surprised that he jumped from the bed,but now he doesnt care anymore and just kiss leons head,mumbles "goo'nite bubh" and sleep again
leon does it so often that if hes gone from his apartment,people call raihan instead of him
raihan hugging leon from the back while leon is doing stuff in the kitchen while singing,and raihan is there like,peppering smooches and compliments while leon is STILL singing,and giggling bc raihan is smooching him
raihan is BAD at it but he sings along with leon in a joking manner and leon cant even sing anymore bc hes just wheezing while raihan is just "cmOn bAbeEEe SING AgAiiiNNnn"
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