#but no one ever talks about this song. AND ITS ONE OF HER BEST ALBUM CLOSERS

[titsthedamnseason]

maybe now everyone will appreciate my darling dearest evermore (song)

[leclercdream]

maroon

this is part 2 of maroon

✮⋆˙ when carlos breaks reader’s heart, lando is ready to mend it

✮⋆˙ ex carlos sainz x singer!reader | bestfriend lando norris x singer!reader

✮⋆˙ warnings: cheating, carlos is an asshole, slut shaming

✮⋆˙ tofi talks: thanks for the love on part 1! one last part coming soon x please ignore dates

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yourusername

liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc, carlossainz55 and others

yourusername: my new album GOOD RIDDANCE out march 27! presave in my bio 💜

this project means a lot to me and i hope you love it as much as i do. i can’t believe this is my first full album!!

i also wanted to thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the love you are giving to MAROON 🍒 i wrote this song at 3a.m. in my best friend’s room, crying my little pisces heart out and accepting that sometimes letting go is for the better. i never expected it to get big, it was just an outlet for me, so again, thank you a million times!

this one is for you, you know who you are.

view 839 comments

landonorris: woop woop landonorris: i’m so incredibly proud of you landonorris: please let me listen to the whole album :(

yourusername: not yet 🤍 lilyzneimer: babe CAN I? i just know a few of these are love songs. oscarpiastri: me too please x yourusername: sending u the link for tmr!!! user1: WHICH ONE ARE LOVE SONGS!????yourusername: i don’t kiss and tell x user2: BITCH ALDNWNS

maxverstappen: P is so excited to hear it!

yourusername: i will send you the link to the early listening party 💜

user3: carlos liking this 😥 the audacity this mas has user4: why is no one talking about the last part guys, is it for lando? carlos???

user5: its not always about them u know?

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yourusername just posted a story

replies

landonorris: can’t wait to see you tonight landonorris: you look beautiful yourusername: lan 🥺 thank u love, got pretty for u!!! landonorris: i’m giggling and kicking my feet landonorris: think about what i told you yourusername: i already said yes lan 🤭

oscarpiastri: why is lando blushing? what did you do? yourusername: lol yourusername: he asked me out on a date and i said yes? 👉🏻👈🏻 oscarpiastri: KALSW SUAVW YN!!!! oscarpiastri: sorry lily took over oscarpiastri: that’s amazing tho, told you he likes you! yourusername: don’t you think it’s too soon? after everything that happened? :/ be honest oscarpiastri: nah, after what carlos did you are allowed to move on. plus if you listen carefully to your songs lando and you are long overdue yourusername: thank u osc 🤍 please take carlos out on the next race yourusername: kidding!!! (not) oscarpiastri: at your service (kidding) (not)

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lando.jpg

liked by yourusername, danielricciardo, kellypiquet and others

lando.jpg: yourusername just finished the first leg of her tour looking beautiful as ever. in honour of new year’s day being played today you can have that picure we took drunk at said party

view 920 comments

user1: i thought this was a yn post lol

user2: the second picture i’m screaming!!! the fact that she was dating carlos at the time yet she always looked at him like that 🥺

user3: slut behaviour

oscarpiastri: i’m so normal about this

yourusername: my favorite photographer ever 🤍

yourusername: glad you could make it tonight!! let’s get a podium tomorrow so we can go home and rest

lando.jpg: yes ma’am

maxverstappen1: Did you do it?

landonorris: yes maxverstappen1: What did she say? landonorris: yes maxverstappen1: 🤝🏻👍🏻 user3: what is this user4: they have such a weird relationship i swear

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yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, lilymhe and ohters

yourusername: highnobiety thank you so much for having me! martietomanova shooting with you is a real rare joy. link in bio if you wanna read my interview taking about silly things and my new album! view 923 comments

user1: my jaw is on the floor

user2: lando must be loosing it rn lol about to risk it all

oscarpiastri: you are correct user2: nooo dont expose him lol

landonorris: asdjqenxf

landonorris: WHAT IS THIS

landonorris: YN???????

landonorris: please pick up the phone im so in love with you *deleted*

landonorris: GORGEOUS GORGEOUS WOMAN

landonorris: stop looking at her PLEASE im going insane

landonorris: you are the most beautiful human being on this whole world

yourusername: 🤭🤭 im blushing yourusername: see u soon? landonorris: YES landonorris: im picking u up RIGHT NOW landonorris: i would risk everything for you *deleted*

user3: anyone else saw lando’s deleted comments? boys down bad haha

user4: i love how as soon as she broke up with him he started showing he likes her lol long overdue

last part coming soon

taglist: @evie-119 @landossainz @noneofyallsbusiness @ladyblablabla @likedbygaslyy @softiecaro @1655clean @willowpains @lightdragonrayne if your name is crossed out i couldnt tag you

[starrywilliams]

guilty as sin? | abby anderson

“these fatal fantasies giving way to labored breath, taking all of me, we’ve already done it in my head”

warnings: masturbation, slight masochism, ruined orgasm, angst, perv!abby (a little), internalized homophobia (discussed in more detail below)

notes: no surprise my favourite ttpd song is the gayest one on the album, but guilty as sin? screams lesbian guilt i fear!!!! i’ve been writing this for over a month so i hope u guys like it 😭

cw: discussion of lesbian guilt & comphet - these are somewhat based on my own experiences with my sexuality and i absolutely!!! do not think a man can ‘cure’ a lesbian or anything similar to that. nor do i believe anyone should ever feel guilty for being gay. realising i’m a lesbian has been extremely freeing & dykes r the best x

wc: 1.8k

likes, comments + reblogs are greatly appreciated :)

the door slammed harshly behind abby as she stormed into her room. she pulled her jacket off desperately; her skin hot under its tight vice. she’d been in the gym, trying to work out her endless frustration of late, when you’d walked in.

you’d only said “hi" and smiled politely at her before setting your things down. but she felt her stomach churn, a black hole opening inside her. abby stood up, pulling the weights off the barbell and onto their rack. she grunted softly, glancing at you from the corner of her eye.

you’d started stretching, currently bent over as you touched your toes. her eyes drifted for an infinitesimal moment, locking onto the swell of your-. she looked away - wrongwrongwrong.

but then she looked back, her stare feasting on your body. she wondered whether you were doing this on purpose, trying to tempt her from across the room. she wondered if you knew her dirty little secret, abby picturing a smirk on your face as you mocked her for such indecent thoughts.

she didn’t want to feel this way. she didn’t want to feel the poison ivy swarming around her chest, getting tighter, tighter. the rash spread inside her; this invisible whip of lust lashing against her skin whenever your face appeared in her mind. well, had it been just your face maybe she wouldn’t feel like some depraved sinner.

now it wasn’t like abby believed in god, in a world where death and destruction infect every crevice you’d have to be mad to believe that any ‘god’ wanted its followers to suffer so greatly. but something inside her screamed every time she had these thoughts. these impure, twisted thoughts about you.

she didn’t know what made her feel like this. what made her resent you for simply existing; and what made her resent herself.

she recalled her teenage years, when manny had subtly suggested that owen liked her - so she was supposed to like him back, right? and she tried! she loved him even - but there was always that something, that feeling in her gut that told her that something was wrong, something about him that just would never sit right with her.

but all the other girls wanted a boyfriend too, and the jealousy was nice at first - she’d thought. after all, mel was the star student, a doctor in the making, her dad’s favourite; and nora was this freshly trained medical officer, and abby was- abby was just abby.

her dad began noticing her more too - previously too preoccupied with his firefly duties and his favourite student. now his little girl was slipping away from him, he finally began paying her the amount of attention she’d craved for so long.

before, their conversations had often drifted into talk of mel and her new achievements, or his hopes of a vaccine, or some animal he was tracking. never anything about his daughter’s life.

having a boyfriend made her interesting, it gave the other girls something to envy. which was a nice reversal, for a while. then her dad died, and she had become this object of pity. owen helped a bit, she supposed. he tried to distract her and keep her focused on their new role as soldiers, but she barely cared about him anymore. all she wanted was revenge, and with revenge, came you.

you were one of the gyms trainers, passionate about helping the members of the wlf stay fit and healthy! you’d helped her start lifting weights, squealed as she reached every milestone, and had remarked jokingly about just how much you loved her new physique.

it was innocent at first, the most being her brain going a little fuzzy when you’d bit your lip while spotting her; a slight blush when you’d hugged her a little too tight. then, once she and owen were finally broken up, these new pictures began hanging themselves on the walls of her mind. still, innocent, just slightly tainted with desire - the true nature of them still an avoidable matter for her back then.

when she could ignore the truth in her recent behaviour, abby loved spending time with you. after all, you were just really good friends! anyway, she’d had a boyfriend before so everyone knew she was normal, and absolutely not different, and she would never ever have to feel like an outsider.

yet it took a mere three months before she gave up on this foolish lie. she liked you, and as long as nobody ever found out, it wouldn’t matter.

but as her mind grew dark and twisted - joel a constant topic in her head as she obsessed over finally getting to enact revenge - her thoughts got worse in turn. she wanted you - filthily and desperately.

every gym session ended with another cold shower, a desperate plea for her body to stop and let her focus on the task at hand; a hopeless attempt to bury this ache into the ground; an endless endeavour to escape these urges for just one second.

but then she came back changed, every hair on her body endlessly erected with guilt. the way she’d killed him so mercilessly, the way it had done nothing to ease the pain, and the way you had tormented her mind ceaselessly throughout the entire trip.

maybe, had she never met you, she could’ve just killed him and been satisfied. maybe had you never offered to train her personally, she could’ve just stayed comfortable in that stuffy closet. maybe if she found the right man she’d stop feeling this way.

abby deemed such ideas unfathomable now.

owen made her feel nothing. being with him was like an eternal thursday, an endless wait for the week’s end and its pleasure to turn up at her door. every day she’d wait for some spark to arrive, the routine only becoming more and more tedious by the minute. but he helped her get people’s attention, which was enough when she was just abby.

but then she was abby anderson, top scar killer and isaac’s favourite. she got attention on her own, she was praised for her own accomplishments: people worshipped the fucking ground she walked on. but they didn’t know who she really was.

they didn’t know she liked girls the way she was supposed to like boys. she’d seen it in enough of those wlf movie nights - cruel jokes about anyone who even thought about being different. she’d heard the way people gossiped, “did you hear that they’re moving lesbians into the family unit? what a joke.”

they said it like it was something dirty, something egregious, something that she had to hate about herself. so she did.

but as long as she kept it secret, kept it locked away in her mind, maybe she’d be okay. after all, only your actions talk: it was the age old question really, if a tree falls in a forest and no one else hears it, does it make a sound?

abby fell back against her bed sheets, calloused hands pushing her cargos down to her ankles as she replayed the sight of you in her mind. bent over - she felt like you were trying to tempt her on purpose.

she felt like a heathen; staring, fantasizing, worshipping. her mind was bursting with the idea of every possible position she could put you in; head a chorus of every little noise she wanted to hear you make; eyes screwed shut as depravity filled her every sense.

she shoved her bralette up her chest roughly, fingertips dragging over her nipples with little mercy. she pinched them, the peach skin stinging underneath her touch.

she wanted it to hurt; wanted it to feel like some sort of punishment for her thoughts. but as her hips bucked into the air, a long whine dragging from her clenched jaw, she realised it needed to hurt more.

she imagined you, finding her like this. disgust burnt into your features - what the fuck was she doing? repeating your name like some subverted prayer, fingers harshly scratching along her stomach as she tried to make the pleasure feel more like pain, trying to induce some connection between the two.

if it hurt enough, would she stop? force herself to forget? could she torture this part of herself until it surrendered?

her hand slipped over the top of her boxers, a finger running tentatively over her clit through the now darkened fabric. she bit down on her lip, groaning against it as she pushed down harder and harder, attempting to break through the skin.

another finger pressed down, beginning to draw circles down on the throbbing bud. she jolted against her own touch, your head between her legs burning into her mind. your hands, trailing along her flesh - groping at her with little tenderness; tongue, swiping at her pussy with no intent of fulfillment: she wanted you to make her weep, smoke out her lungs with shame, deny her from gratification until all she could feel was regret.

she pulled away, only to cover her fingertips with her spit - diving under her boxers to continue with her corruption. abby let out a strangled sigh, hips grinding against her fingers as they toyed with her clit.

she moved a hand to her hair, knuckles stretching against her scalp as she began to pull her braid. she grunted, yanking even harder. she whispered your name: pained, hopeless.

she sped up her assault against her pussy, feeling that pit in the bottom of her stomach begin to grow. “pleasepleaseplease” her voice cracked as she begged, unsure what she was pleading for.

she wanted to stop, but she needed to try and make this feeling go away. she knew it would come back, it always did - but even five minutes free from your torment on her mind might save her.

her fingers kept going, drawing desperate circles against her weeping pussy relentlessly. the void was growing, almost consuming her entirely at this point. she thought of you laughing at her current state: a crying mess, pussy wet with perversion.

it was sick, really - how the idea of you hating her for this made her need even worse. you’d probably think it appalling: someone who was supposed to be your friend, now sat here burning at the thought of you.

a part of her wished that you shared this sickness. that you too let yourself be overwhelmed by the thought of sin. maybe you didn’t let the guilt swallow you whole - she hoped so.

but there was no point lingering in the what-ifs, they were far too fleeting.

her deft fingers quickened their pace, the ache all consuming. the climb began - a desperate jump towards oblivion. closer, closer. the flames scorched her bedsheets as her breathing hastened.

fuck, she hissed before reaching the apex with a scream of your name. a scream? a whisper? a thought? it didn’t make her actions any less deplorable.

her conscience grabbed pleasure by the throat as she ripped her fingers away, putting out the blaze on her hips like a cigarette crushed on the ground.

the desire imploded within the walls of her torso; scratching against her insides in the vengeance of her denial.

it was wrong; she had to stop it. yet still, the guilt poured into her lungs with no chance of resolve. she was a fool for thinking it would fix her. maybe next time it would work. maybe next time the exorcism would finally purify her.

until next time.

[starsinthesky5]

you are in love | joe burrow x reader

description: how did you end up falling head over heels for the quarterback of the Cincinnati Bengals? but most importantly, how did the quarterback end up falling harder for you?

a/n: this is my first fic ever so bare with me! i’m still getting the hang of writing about joe. i have tried a few times but ended up deleting them because I didn’t like how they turned out LOL. buttt I got bored and got a little confidence and decided to try again. i hope you all like it (if anyone even reads this). this is based off of one of my favorite songs ever and I thought it would make a nice fic. i hope its not too cringe, enjoy :)

warnings: slight smut and allusions to sex, language

word count: 5.5 k

part 2

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present day:

One look, Dark Room

Meant just, For you

Time moved too fast, You play it back

“And that should do it,” Joe says as he places the final pillow onto the fort.

“Didn’t know you had “architect” in your job portfolio. This is impressive,” you giggled as you got into the fort.

“No need for the flattery babe, gotta make sure your first night here is comfy so you come back,” Joe replied while draping a blanket over your legs.

“Oh I’ll be back, someone has to use the massive pool, and knowing you, you won’t go in there without me,” you said while thinking about all the exciting things you’ll get to do with him at his new house.

“You got that right, but you’re the one who needs to hang on to me and use me as her personal flotation device,” he says as he settles on the pillows across from you.

“Well then, maybe you shouldn’t be so huggable Mr. Burrow,” you say before throwing a pillow at him.

Today was you and Joe’s 6 month anniversary. You two had spent the entire day moving Joe into his new house that he bought when he signed his extension. There were boxes everywhere and hardly any furniture set up, so Joe ended up building a blanket fort for the night. He spent every free moment apologizing for not being able to do something romantic for your anniversary, but you didn’t mind. Any moment with him was special.

“Thank you for helping me out today, I know you probably didn’t think we’d be spending most of the weekend doing this when I asked you to come to Cincinnati,” He said as he was fidgeting with his wristbands.

You lived all the way in Los Angeles and were currently in the middle of working on your 3rd studio album. You were in desperate need of a break and inspiration, so you jumped on the first flight to Cincinnati to see your favorite person.

“Joe, you've apologized enough. Seriously, it’s perfectly fine. You know that I don’t care about the fancy dates and over-the-top gestures. Any time we get to spend together means the world to me, even if it involves carefully moving your extensive Lego collection to the new house,” you chuckle while rubbing his foot.

Joe’s heart was exploding while you were talking. He seriously doesn’t understand how he got so lucky. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to him and he wanted to do everything possible to show you. But the one thing he adored most about you was that you didn’t care for all the glitz and glamor of dating an NFL quarterback. And you loved that he didn’t care about your Hollywood status or all the attention you’d get from the public.

Joe got up on his knees and crawled over to the spot next to you. Once he sat down, you immediately latched onto him and buried yourself into his neck, missing the warmth of his body.

“See, you’re so huggable,” you murmured against his neck.

You heard him softly laugh and felt his hand move up your side, squeezing your arm. “How did I get so lucky” you wondered to yourself.

——————————————————

first meeting:

Buttons on a coat, Light-hearted joke

No proof, not much

But you saw enough

Flashback to July 4th: The Hamptons, New York

You dreaded going to the big 4th of July bash hosted by Micheal Rubin every year, but as an up-and-coming musician, saying “No” to this kind of party would be stupid given the number of connections you could make. The party would always have the most elite Celebrities, Models, Musicians, and Athletes; meaning a lot of small talk and fake laughing. This would be your third time going, and every time you end up sitting in the corner, alone with your way too strong Vodka Martini, counting down the minutes until you could leave. But this year, something was different.

You did end up sitting in the corner with your way too-strong Martini, but you weren't alone. And you certainly weren't counting down the minutes until you could leave. Hell, you were even wishing this night would never end.

“What happens to Football Players when they become blind?” he asked.

“Hmm, I don’t know,” you replied.

“They become referees,” he said while smirking.

“Joe! You can’t say that!” you wheezed out. You couldn't contain your laughter any longer. You weren’t sure if it was because of the Martini, or the fact that Joe Burrow was sitting next to you, also drinking a Vodka Martini.

“Hey, it’s the truth, but you didn’t hear that from me,” Joe said while throwing his hands up.

“You got it Mr. QB1, but I do agree; it’s such BS when they miss the most clear calls,” you giggled.

You weren’t really sure how you and Joe ended up basically spending the entire party by each other's side. One minute you're about to sit and scroll on your phone as usual, and the next thing you know you’re telling your life story to a guy you just met. Were you a little buzzed, absolutely. But something about him made you feel comfortable and safe, even though you just met.

“You’re really cool by the way,” Joe whispered.

“Gee, aren’t you Shakespeare,” you smiled and took another sip of your drink.

“Seriously though. The entire time we've been sitting here, not once did you purposefully bring up the fact that I’m an NFL quarterback. Not many girls can talk to me without bringing up football or trying to flirt with me. It’s exhausting,” he confessed but quickly realized how cocky he sounds. “Not that every girl tries to flirt with me,” he added. 

You laughed and said, “Well, lucky for you I find more value in real conversations than all that superficial stuff. I totally understand the feeling, I love talking to people about my music but after a certain point I just want to talk about normal things and have real conversation,”

I do think it’s cool that you’re a football player since I grew up watching it, but I want to know more about you, not the quarterback,” you continue.

“Well then Miss Y/N, I’m in New York for a few more days, let me take you out to dinner so you can get to know the real Joe a little more,” he boldly asked.

You stared into his deep blue eyes, eyes you wouldn’t mind getting lost in. Something about those eyes was promising. You’ve only just met him and for all you know, he could be a typical “Fuck Boy athlete” looking for a quick hookup. There was nothing to attest to what he was saying, but part of you was willing to take the risk. Something about him felt different.

“Earth to Y/N-”

“Okay,” was all you said.

Little did you know that saying yes to Joe was one of the best decisions you’ve ever made.

——————————————————

early dating:

Small talk, he drives

Coffee at midnight

The light reflects, The chain on your neck

He says, “Look up”, And your shoulders brush

No proof, one touch, But you felt enough

Flashback to your first time visiting Joe in Cincinnati

It had been a few weeks since you and Joe had dinner together and he had been nothing but a gentleman. The two of you talked about everything from your childhoods to your current aspirations, to your favorite music, and even geeking out about Marvel Movies plus everything nerdy. Joe made you feel good about yourself. He would always tell you how pretty you looked and paid the most attention whenever you would talk. He made you feel butterflies, something which you hadn’t felt in a long time.

After you left New York, the two of you couldn’t stop talking to each other. The silly conversations eventually turned into deep ones; you telling him things you’ve only shared with a select number of people. You felt comfortable when you were talking to him, so this wasn’t difficult for you. He shared things with you about himself that he would only share with those close to him, which was very few since he kept a tight circle. You both shared a mutual feeling of trust, willing to lay yourself bare just to get to know one another. You’d always text him after a vigorous studio sesh to vent and he would update you on his off-season progress. Those texts eventually turned into late-night facetimes, which ended up in Joe asking you to fly out and see him. You hesitated a bit before saying yes. In the back of your mind, you were scared. You knew that the more you two talked and saw one another, the more attached you’d get. He could break your heart into a thousand pieces if you weren’t careful. But you owed it to yourself and to Joe to try.

You hummed along to whatever song was playing on the radio as you looked out the window and watched the bright city skyline fade. It was currently midnight in Cincinnati and Joe insisted that he take you to his favorite secret spot on your first trip here.

“You tired?” Joe asked as he glanced over to you, taking in every one of your features.

God you looked so pretty, he thought. You were wearing one of his old Athens Football hoodies and had your hair in a messy bun. You weren’t wearing any makeup and even had on a pair of his slides, which were a few sizes too big. Even in your most natural state, he looked at you like you were a diamond.

“A little. Didn’t get a lot of sleep on the plane,” you yawned out.

“I promise this will be worth it,” Joe said as he placed his hand on your bare thigh.

You immediately tensed up at the foreign contact. Joe felt you tense up and went to remove his hand but you put it right back on your thigh and felt your face turning red. Your stomach was doing somersaults right now.

“Those damn butterflies,” you thought to yourself.

“So, how’s the album coming along?” Joe casually questioned as if he didn’t just make you want to scream out of excitement.

“It’s good, slow, but making progress. I feel like I’ve hit a dead end and am having major writer's block so I think stepping away from it for a little bit will be good for me. Things were getting a bit stuffy and loud. I feel like I was getting somewhere but it always ends up being nothing,” you say as you place your hand on top of his, playing with his fingers.

“That’s good, I hope this weekend will be a breath of fresh air for you. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Always remember that you’re doing your best,”

You looked over at Joe and felt your heart swell up. He knew exactly what to say and how to make a girl feel special.

~10 minutes later~

“We’re here,” Joe says as he turns off the car. 

You looked out the window and saw nothing but trees and grass. You were confused as to where he brought you but before you could ask him, he got out of the car and jogged to your door to open it for you.

“Thank you, Joey,” you blushed as he closed the door behind you.

Joe stepped behind you and whispered into your ear “Close your eyes, I promise it’ll make it even better”.

You closed your eyes and felt his hand on the small of your back. He led you through what felt like a clearing in the trees to a flat grassy patch. You could feel the cold wind against your bare legs meaning that you were out of the woods.

“Open,” he told you.

When you opened your eyes you were met with the most beautiful sight. The same skyline you saw up close, now you were looking at from a distance. It was breathtaking. In Front of you was a picnic blanket and a beautiful set up of candles.

“Holy shit Joe, this is beautiful,” you say in awe.

“Welcome to the lookout point. My favorite place to go when I need a minute alone. I also remember you mentioning how you loved looking at skylines during the sunset and even though we couldn’t make it for the sunset part, I thought this would be the next best thing,” He says as he leads you both to the blanket.

You both sat down on the blanket and he immediately pulled you into his chest. You both faced the bright skyline and all Joe could think about was how much peace he felt at that moment. It was just the two of you sitting in your own little world. The darkness and quietness around you both felt comforting because it was a sign that this moment was just for you both;  no outside noise or distractions.

“This is insane, I mean you can see the whole city and river from up here!” You say as you settle into his arms, your back to his chest.

“That’s not even the best part Y/N, look up,” He points.

You turn your head up to look at him and then you look up. You’re met with what is probably the clearest view of the stars you’ve ever gotten.

“It’s beautiful,” you whisper, not removing your eyes from the sky.

“You’re beautiful,” Joe says while looking down at you.

You got that feeling again. Your stomach was doing somersaults and the butterflies were back. Could this be that feeling? A feeling you hadn’t felt in a while? That feeling you get when the right person enters your life at the right time? Was Joe that person? So many questions filled your head that you didn’t realize Joe had been softly caressing your thigh the entire time which pulled you out of your trance. 

“That right there is the Big Dipper which points straight to-”

“Polaris,” you interrupt.

“Space nerd,” Joe shakes his head and laughs out.

“Don’t think I don’t know about your space nerdy ways Burrow, I know this is your domain,” you huff out. Joe had told you back in New York that he loved anything and everything space and physics-related. You admired how someone like him was a complete nerd under the tough shell he had. You naturally went back to your apartment and spent an hour or two updating yourself on space quick facts, which certainly paid off.

You slowly got out of his embrace and sat up across from him. 

“Is something wrong?” He asked with a hint of confusion in his voice.

“No, nothing’s wrong Joe,” you chuckle.

“It’s perfect actually. It’s all perfect. You’re perfect,” you say as you move closer to him, still sitting up. “You know how to make a girl feel special, this was really sweet of you Joe,” you say as you play with the strings of his your hoodie. 

“I just wanna make my girl feel special,” he confesses while moving your hair out of your face.

His girl.

Those were the only words you needed to hear before you jumped onto him and pressed your lips against his. His lips fit perfectly against yours like you were made for each other, so soft and sweet. He slipped his tongue in between the valley of your lips and entered your mouth which caused you to let out a soft whimper. You both spent a few moments exploring each other’s mouths before he broke apart the heated moment.

“I take that as a “yes I’ll be your girlfriend”,” he questioned while searching your face for an answer.

“I didn’t know you were asking,” you teased.

Joe’s face dropped, did he push you too fast? You noticed his facial expression change and immediately pressed a soft kiss onto the tip of his nose and laughed,  “Yes silly, I’ll be your girl,”.

——————————————————

it's getting serious:

Morning, his place, Burnt toast, Sunday 

You keep his shirt, He keeps his word

And for once, you let go, Of your fears & your ghosts 

One step, not much,  But it said enough

Flashback to Joe’s house (4 months into dating)

The warm sunlight flooded the room as you slowly woke up, your body sore and wrapped up in Joe’s sheets, and Joe himself. Joe was sound asleep, fully koala bear hugging you with his head on your chest. God, how does he look so perfect this early in the morning? His dirty blonde curls were sprawled out against your chest and his lips were curled up, almost smiling. Your eyes moved to his back, a few red scratches still visible. You made a mental note that you should probably trim down on the length of your acrylics if this was going to become a common thing for you two, smiling at the thought of what unfolded the night before. You freed your hand from under the sheets and moved it around his back, hoping to soothe any pain you caused. 

The two of you had stumbled into his house late last night after a delicious dinner and wine tasting at a local winery. You two had a few too many glasses of wine and were lucky you made it home in one piece. 

 Flashback to last night 

“I don’t think I’ve ever had that many glasses of wine in one sitting before,” you slurred as Joe led you inside the kitchen.

“Me either, next time make sure I stop after the 3rd glass. And it’s a good thing we got someone to take us back and forth,” he said as he took off his jacket and went to get you both some water. 

“Literally. If you were to drive I think we’d end up in the Ohio River,” you deadpanned. 

“Haha, really funny,” Joe said as he handed you a glass of water. 

“God my feet feel like they’re on fire,”. You wailed out while taking a sip of the icy cold beverage.

Joe looked over at you and saw you eyeing your feet. You were wearing a short skin-tight black dress; one of his favorites. The low cut of the dress highlighted your neck which had his favorite part of your outfit. The necklace he gave you for your 1 month anniversary. A simple pendant with the letter “J”. After he gave you that necklace, you never took it off. It became a part of you, and he noticed that. 

Joe crouched down and began untying your heels. 

“Joe you don’t have to do that,” you cooed while twirling your fingers through his hair. 

“I don’t have to, but I want to,” he said while flashing you a smile.

He helped you step out of your heels and back onto the ground. Once he got back up he wrapped his big hands around your waist and your hands immediately found their home around his neck and into his hair again.

You inched your face a little closer to his and pressed a delicate kiss onto his soft pink lips.

“Hi,” you whisper against his lips. This time, he pressed a soft kiss on your nose.

“Hi,” he whispered back, staring into your eyes.

“Tonight was really fun. Thank you for always knowing how to get my mind off of things,” you say while staring into his baby blues. 

“No need to thank me Y/N. I know how hard you work and how things can become overwhelming. I’m glad that I can get your mind off of things, even if it’s for a little bit,” 

He wasn’t wrong. Things often become too much for you back in LA and coming to Joe was your escape. Being with him blocked out the outside noise, you would completely forget about whatever was bothering you. You guys would often end up doing the most random things together, without any plan, but that was okay. Those nights where you’d end up eating Chinese takeout on the floor while building a new Lego set were your favorites. The hot summer days where you both would spend the entire afternoon attached to each other in the pool was one of your favorite ways to destress, it was just the two of you. He is your shelter in the hurricane that is your life. 

For Joe, it was very similar. Anytime football would get too real, he’d come straight to you. You were always there whenever he needed to vent or talk something out, knowing you’d always listen. You had been to every single one of his games so far and were always waiting for him in the suite after. Whether he was upset after a shitty game or on Cloud 9, you were always there waiting with open arms. And he loved it. He loved being able to share his high moments with you, even if you had to see some of his lows. Your relationship hadn’t become public yet, which you two were incredibly grateful for. You both were incredibly private people and wanted to take in as much as you could before the whole world had an opinion of your romance. Getting to know each other in private, away from prying eyes, was a blessing.

The two of you continued to stare into each other's eyes, you found yourself once again getting lost in his. 

You felt Joe’s hand migrate to your ass, giving it a soft squeeze.“Getting handsy now aren’t we, Burrow,” you softly giggled. 

“Can’t help it if my girl looks so goddamn beautiful in this dress,” he said matter-of-factly. 

“I appreciate the flattery Mr. Burrow, but do you need something from me or are you just being a flirt” you teased.

“I need you,” he blurted out. 

Your heart almost beat out of your chest when you heard him say that. You and Joe haven’t taken that step in your relationship. You’ve had your fair share of heated make-outs that occasionally involve wandering hands, but nothing like that has happened, yet. It’s not that you didn’t want to, god you wanted to. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t want to climb him like a tree. His perfectly sculpted chest, his muscular arms, those thighs, and that face. He made you weak in the knees, and he was well aware. He never pressured you to go there, letting you know that it’s okay to take things slow. But tonight you didn’t feel like taking it slow. 

“Then show me, Joe,” you said as you felt your arousal shoot up.

Joe immediately picked you up, bridal style, causing you to let out a shriek. Your arms wrapped around his neck as he launched you both up the stairs, taking the steps 2 at a time, eventually rushing into the bedroom.

“Joe, slow down!” You squeak out while laughing. 

He carefully laid you on his bed admiring you for a second; you looked perfect, even with messy hair and smudged makeup. Joe moved onto the bed and started placing soft butterfly kisses up your arm, right up to that spot on your neck that he knows you love.

“Joe, please,” You whimpered, fully implying you wanted more with the tone of your voice.

Joe removed himself from your neck, looked into your eyes, and said “Are you sure?”. 

You smiled and said “Absolutely,”. 

He then captured your lips in a passionate and deep kiss. You felt like kissing him till your lips fell off, it was like heaven when you two would connect. Slowly, both of your clothes ended up on the floor and those passion-filled kisses turned messy and sloppy. You felt those butterflies in your stomach again as he was kissing his way down your body. You did not doubt that Joe would be careful with you, and you knew he wanted this just as much as you did. 

End of Flashback

You decided to go back to sleep since it was still pretty early and you know Joe was tired from last night. You woke up a few hours later to the smell of cinnamon and coffee. 

“Mmmm,” You say as you stretch out. You didn’t feel any weight on you anymore so Joe must have woken up. You looked around the room and didn’t see him anywhere so you decided to freshen up in his bathroom and head downstairs. When you entered the bathroom you saw one of his shirts (a purple long sleeve LSU shirt aka one of your favs) on the counter with a sticky note saying “For you :)”. You put on the soft shirt (which was way too big) and start fixing your messy hair before heading downstairs. 

You walk into the kitchen and see the dining table decked out with a vase of pink carnations (which happens to be your favorite flower), 2 plates of French toast, and a smoothie for Joe. You also noticed a mug of coffee which made you smile. Joe knew that you would be a zombie the whole day if you didn’t have your daily morning coffee.  Joe was too busy cooking the bacon to notice you coming downstairs, so you walked up behind him and wrapped your hands around him from behind.

“Good morning sexy chef,” you murmured against his back.

“Tryna get me going again?” He teased. 

“You wish, last night was a damn workout. I need at least 3 hours to recover before we go at it again,” you giggled.  

You heard his soft laugh before he spun around and wrapped his hands around your waist. “Well, we will def be repeating that. “Sooner the better,” he added. 

“Horndog,” you said as you pressed a kiss on his cheek.

“Only for you babe,” he says before going back to the bacon. “I’m almost done with this, you can sit at the table.”

“Damn, quarterback, perfect boyfriend, and chef? Impressive job portfolio,” you say while walking to the table and sitting down. 

Joe finished cooking the bacon and sat down across from you. “The French toast is a little burnt, I got distracted by the TV,” he admitted. “They were showing this month’s Top 10 funniest cat videos.” 

You burst out laughing and say “Guess I should add Cat Lady to your job portfolio too,”

You two spent the morning digging into the delicious breakfast Joe had prepared, even though the French toast was slightly burnt. He talked about the upcoming football season and how excited he was for the new offensive schemes they had come up with. After breakfast, you both ended up on the couch and decided to play a round of go fish. You gave him some album updates, which he’d constantly ask for, and even played one of your demos for him. 

“Y/N this is amazing,” he said softly. The song he had just heard was called “Sweet Nothing”, and you weren't planning on ever letting anyone hear it because of how intimate and special it was. A big part of what you did involved you being in the public eye a lot, which allowed everyone to nitpick and talk about your life. It was exhausting how often people would comment on your relationships, friendships, career, body, and everything in between. They always expected you to be perfect in every aspect and when you weren’t, they would make it known. You had written about how Joe never expected anything from you like everyone else did. Being with him was easy and you knew you could always go to him whenever the background noise would get too loud. And now here he was, listening to those feelings you had a hard time saying out loud. 

“Thank you. To be honest I wasn’t planning on letting anyone hear that,” you say while looking down and fidgeting with your rings. 

“Really?” he asked. “It’s really good, and I’m not just saying that because I’m your boyfriend.” 

“Yep. I love it, I really do. I think it’s one of the best songs I’ve written so far, but I feel like it’s too bare and the fans won’t understand the real meaning behind the song. And I feel like they won’t like it.” 

“And that’s exactly why you should release it. I know the real you, and that is the real you,” he says while pointing at your phone. Screw the fans, you should do what makes you happy.” he says before reaching for your hand, giving it a tight squeeze. “You make music because that makes you happy and you shouldn’t have to worry about what people will say. If they have an issue with you doing what you want, then they are sure as hell not fans.” 

You got up on your knees and jumped onto Joe’s body, making you both lay flat against each other on the couch. 

“How do you always know what to say,” you beam while prepping soft kisses all over his face. 

Your heart felt like it was about to explode. It only took a few months for someone you just met to understand you more than people following your journey over the past few years. Joe’s words felt like a warm comforting hug, and they always made you feel like everything was going to be okay. You valued his words so much, you trusted him so much, and he loved that you were so open and vulnerable with him. He knew that opening up was difficult for you, and he felt at peace knowing you felt comfortable confiding in him. You weren't holding back anymore. You were 100% open and honest with him and he never took advantage of it. Your fears of getting hurt were fading away.

——————————————————

present day:

You kiss on sidewalks, You fight and you talk

One night he wakes, Strange look on his face,

Pauses, then says, “You’re my Best Friend”

And you knew what it was, He is in Love

“Y/N?” was all you heard as you felt your shoulder shake. “Did I lose you there?” Joe asked. 

“What?” you questioned as you looked up at him. You were back in the fort Joe built for you two. 

“I was asking what you thought of the house,” he says as he plays with your hair. “Is something wrong?” he asks. 

“Oh. Sorry, I must have dozed off for a second,” you lied, not admitting you were caught in a series of flashbacks. “I think it’s amazing. It’s sooo big and has so much potential.” you continue. 

“Yeah, it is pretty big,” he says with a sigh. You look up at him and immediately sense the change in his tone plus the dejected look on his face, “Is that not what you wanted?” you say with concern. “I thought you wanted a big house.” 

“I did, I do. I just don’t want to be alone in this big of a house when you aren’t here,” he confessed, feeling slightly embarrassed as if he didn’t have other things to occupy his free time. “Unless,” he added.

“Unless what?” you asked. 

He hesitated before saying, “Move in with me”. 

It took a few moments for your brain to register what he said to you. You immediately sat up, as did he. You were about to say something but he cut you off before you could.

“Y/N. These past 6 months have been nothing short of peaceful and amazing. Being with you brings me the balance I need in my life. I know that if I ever fly too high or get lost, I have someone who can find me and bring me back down. You are everything I’ve ever wanted in life, and now you’re everything I need.” he says. 

“You’re my biggest cheerleader, my support system, my safety net, but most importantly.” He pauses and says, "You're my best friend.” “And I love you.” he finishes. 

Those 3 words. The 3 words that you’ve wanted to say to him for months but didn’t because you weren’t entirely sure if he felt the same way. Those 3 words just came out of his mouth, and he meant it. He loved you more than anything and he needed to make it known. He needed to wake up to your smile every morning. He needed to hear your voice echo through the halls of the house. You made him feel loved, and he needed you to know that.

You didn’t realize the hot tears streaming down your cheeks until Joe lifted his hand and started wiping them.

“Y/N, are you okay?” he asks, feeling nervous since you didn’t respond to anything he just said. 

You started crying even harder. He loved you. He really loved you. 

“Y/N you’re scaring me”.

“Shut up,” you said before you put your hands on his face and brought him in for a passionate kiss. 

You kissed him for a few heartbeats and finally whispered against his lips “I love you,” loud enough for just him to hear before you captured his lips in another kiss.

He stops kissing you and stares into your eyes for a moment, getting lost in them like you do with his eyes. “So about my first question,” he beams. 

“Yes silly, I’ll move in with you,” you giggle. “Someone has to make sure that you don’t burn this place down while making french toast. You got lucky last time,” you laugh out while remembering that morning. 

“Haha, really funny babe,” he says before pulling you into a hug. The warmth of your bodies pressed together was the most comforting feeling in the world. Joe spent the rest of the night telling you how much he loved you, and you reciprocated the feeling by showing him how much you loved him.

We’re in love.

—The End—

[strangersteddierthings]

The Interview

Inspired by this post by @xoxoladyaz. Read on Ao3.

-

Eddie wakes up to one single missed call from Gareth on his private phone.

No one calls his private phone.

He dials back instantly.

"Hey Eddie," Gareth greets. He sounds tired.

"What's up? What's happened?" Eddie asks, a thousand and one scenarios running through his mind. Gareth is in Indianapolis, and Eddie's thoughts are filled with only his uncle back in Hawkins.

"Nothing's happened that we can't deal with, or rather, that I've already been dealing with. But, uhh, there's an interview you should watch. Let me send you a link-" there's a pause as Gareth does just that "-and just call me back after you've watched it. I know we usually ignore the shit people say about us but this- it's different."

"Okayyyy," Eddie says slowly. "I'll watch it."

They hang up without goodbye because Eddie's just going to call him back after the video. Opening his messages he sees the link, and then Gareth sent a follow up text you need to watch from 12:32 onward.

The video is nearly two weeks old already, and YouTube shows him a face he knows. Robin Buckley looks older but it's definitely her. Her hair isn't styled much differently than she had it in high school, just above her shoulders and a little wild. She's wearing a three piece suit in emerald green, slightly oversized on purpose by the look of it. She's sitting in a chair, cradling a grammy with one arm, as the interviewer sits across from her.

Eddie taps the screen and drags the progress bar closer to the 12-minute mark and listens. He hears the tail end of Robin's response to some question about her album before the interviewer asks what must be the question Gareth wants him to listen to.

'So, I think everyone is dying to know if you and Eddie Munson are friends. You're both from Hawkins, Indiana. Isn't that correct?' the interviewer asks.

Robin's smile slips a bit, 'I- uhh, this is going to be unprofessional of me but I made a promise to someone regarding if I was ever asked about Eddie Munson. So, can I have one minute to make a phone call before I answer your question?'

'Oh. By all means, make your call.'

Eddie watches as Robin is brought her phone by someone who is probably her personal assistant. She wastes no time in unlocking it and finding whoever in her contacts list.

'No time for formalities. I've been asked about Munson. Can I tell the truth?' Robin's mic isn't strong enough to pick up whatever answer she gets on the phone but she shakes her head to whatever answer she's been given. 'I told you, I love you more than this career and I've already got the grammy. I'll handle the fallout. It's not about me. It's about you.' What follows is a few seconds of silence before Robin nods and says goodbye, ending the call and passing the phone back to the PA.

The interviewer's eyebrows are up to her hairline in shock. 'That sounds ominous. You think it's career ending?'

Robin grins and it's almost feral. 'Corroded Coffin's fans have always been ruthless, and perhaps a bit heartless, so what I have to say will certainly set them on the attack. To answer your original question, yes, Eddie Munson and I are from Hawkins. We even shared band class in high school, but that's the end of what connects us. We are not friends, but we once were.'

'Can you elaborate on that?'

'Our friendship ended ten years ago when he ruined my best friend's life for fame and fortune, and Steve's never really known a day of peace since.'

Eyes wide, the interviewer leans closer, 'Steve? As in, Hey Steve, Steve?'

Robin nods, 'Just the one.'

'Are you prepared to talk about how one song ruined your friend's life?'

'That was the purpose of the phone call. Yes, I think people should know the truth. Munson vented his bullshit breakup rage into a song and fucked off out of town. A week after its release, his fans doxxed Steve. He wasn't out to his parents, you see, and Corroded Coffin's fans, Eddie Munson's fans, outed him. They sent hate mail to his house by the ton, it seemed. The fallout from that- the aftermath-' Robin cuts off as her eyes water and she swipes at them, smearing some mascara across her cheek. 'I'm sorry. I almost lost my best friend, the platonic love of my life, that day.

'It's public knowledge, what happened, you can look it up online if you know what to look for. But it is also so incredibly personal. I want to be the one to say this because it's important. What you do in life, it has consequences, and sometimes those consequences are for other people. Whether you think it will, or not. I'd rather people hear it from a human voice, from someone who loves Steve, and not the journalist view. No offense,' Robin shoots the interviewer a sweet smile.

'None taken, please continue.'

'Steve was hospitalized, I won't give the details,' Robin says, in a watery voice as she's clearly trying to not cry at the memory. 'When Steve was finally released from the hospital, there was no one but me to pick him up. And he's going through this while nursing a broken heart. He and Munson had only been broken up for maybe a month before Hey Steve came out.

'In less than two months, Steve had lost his parents, his home, all his belongings, and the man he thought he'd marry one day. And to top it off, that man gets to become rich and famous off a venomous, hate-filled song about their breakup. It talks about Steve like he's coward for not willing to be out, yet, and how... what's the line, about conformity?'

'Conformity holds your leash, baby, so run to the end of your chain and bark,' someone off camera shouts.

'Yes, that, thanks. Accusing Steve of picking 'conformity' over his love. Steve wasn't picking conformity, he was picking safety! And the worst part? The hate mail has never stopped. Steve lived with me and my family for a few months after getting out of the hospital before the hate mail got too much, and someone showed up at my childhood home, looking for him, threatening him. They had a gun. It was traumatic. I was still in my senior year of high school-' Robin cuts off, taking deep breaths.

The interviewer reaches across to place a comforting hand on Robin's, 'I can't even imagine what that must have been like.'

Once Robin has composed herself, she says, 'sorry, this is a lot. I've had ten years to come to terms with it, and I've waited seven for someone to ask me about Munson. I didn't think it would be this hard.

'And it's not- I can't blame Munson, or Corroded Coffin, for everything that happened. He doesn't control his fans. But he's never said anything about the treatment his fans give Steve. And if they're like this towards Steve, are they like this towards all his other ex's? Does Munson not care, or, almost worse, does he not even know?' she stops again, getting a faraway look for a moment before looking at the interviewer again. 'I had to help Steve move again. Just last month. They're still finding him. Sending him hate. Doxxing him.' Now she looks at the camera directly, "Eddie Munson. Call off your fans. Stop playing Hey Steve at concerts. Isn't a decade of hurt enough?'

There isn't a lot that makes Eddie feel anything these days, he'll admit. A decade of fame has made him a bit cynical and callus. However, Robin had said something that made his insides squirm. He swipes across the screen, rewinding the video to hear Robin say Steve had lost his parents, his home, all his belongings, and the man he thought he'd marry one day. Swipe. -ents, his home, all his belongings, and the man he thought he'd marry one day. Swipe. The man he thought he'd marry one day. Swipe. Marry one day.

He pauses the video. That can't be right. That has to be a lie Robin is adding. To garner more sympathy or make Eddie, and therefore Corroded Coffin, look worse. Steve and he had been young and naive when they'd dated. There was no way they'd have ended up married, even if Eddie had stuck around Hawkins longer. Gay marriage wasn't even legal when they broke up in 2013.

Eddie unpauses, skips forward to the end and listens to Robin speak directly to him. Stop playing Hey Steve? The song that rocketed Corroded Coffin into the limelight? No way. And call off his fans? Like they're dogs he's supposed to control or something. The video ends and the YouTube algorithm shows him a number of react videos. Eddie clicks on one and falls down the rabbit hole.

At first the algorithm shows him responses in his favor. Videos made by his fans defending him, or strategically picking apart what Robin had said. Eddie wants to agree with them, he doesn't think he's done anything wrong other than live his life, but then.

Then a video of a guy wearing merch sold during their tour last year plays. He's on the right side of the video while a screen recording is on the left. It takes him less than five minutes to get Steve's past addresses found. And Eddie is... well, he's a little horrified at how long the list is. At the short amount of time Steve's spent in any one place is.

The guy in the video reads out the state, city, and how long Steve lived at each address. The longest one is when Steve made the jump from Florida to Maine, where he lived for 19 months according to the video, and that was years ago.

And then the guy, he fucking starts to speculate about where Steve might have moved to next.

"We can't know for sure, but it looks like he headed back west? You can see from the last 3 addresses he's been just jumping state lines to the next place. I'm guessing Oklahoma, Kansas or Nebraska next. If Steve thinks he can try and ruin Corroded Coffin through Robin Buckley, then it's up to us to prove him wrong," the guy is saying, and Eddie thinks maybe this guy is just exaggerating but the comment section is already filled with other people saying vile shit about what they should send to Steve or what they'd like to do to him physically and-

Eddie clicks off the video, to the next recommended. The more he watches, the angrier they seem to get. He goes to the search bar and looks for new react videos.

He finds that everyone has an opinion. He watches videos where his own fans express their disappointment in him. They talk about how Corroded Coffin runs an antibully campaign and then allows their fans to bully an ex and for not calling out the ones doxxing people, wanting to know which was the reason - does Eddie not know, or does he not care? Eddie didn't know. Truly. But he can't help but wonder if he didn't know because he didn't care.

He'd written all his feelings into a song, and now that he's older, he can see that a lot of what he was feeling is an exaggeration and dramatization of what really happened. But the point is, he'd written out his feelings and moved on.

The man he thought he'd marry one day.

His stomach twists uncomfortably as Robin's voice rings in his mind.

He continues his spiral down YouTube until Gareth calling him again breaks through and he answers.

"How is this the first time I'm hearing about Robin's interview?" Eddie demands.

"You've got a damn good PR team, that's how. I guess you fell down the rabbit hole, then?"

"How'd you-"

"Is been almost 4 hours since we talked. Doesn't take that long to watch a 30 minute video."

"Oh. Alright. So, why did you want me to watch the video? Am I supposed to respond to Robin?"

"No. People don't actually want to hear from you. They want to hear from Steve. And that's why you needed to watch. 'Cause Robin's announced that Steve's finally ready to make a statement. Robin's going to post it on her Twitter. Tonight. So, we've got to be ready. If anything Robin said turns out to be true, we might have a problem on our hands. A slander lawsuit being just the beginning."

"Fuck."

"What a way to sum it up," Gareth chuckles into the phone before his tone becomes serious, "hey, how are you doing, though? With it all?"

He thinks about it, and how he really feels, before answering. "It's been years since I've thought about Steve, y'know? I... I've had that luxury. I didn't know.... Did you?"

"No. Hell no! I'd of said something. I mean, shit man, we run an antibully campaign 'cause high school was shit to us. If I'd known at all we'd have been telling them to fuck off. Harassment's just what they call bullying adults."

Eddie swallows. "Guess we just have to wait and see what Stevie has to say."

"I'd come sit on the couch with you and refresh twitter frantically but, well, Indy's a bit of a ways off. I'll call after Robin's posted, then?"

"Yeah, man. Let's see the damage," Eddie sighed. "Talk to ya later."

"Bye."

Eddie digs out his laptop and pulls up Robin's twitter page. He adds an auto-refresher extension and sets it to refresh every minute before opening his phone and pulling up YouTube again.

[pedrithink]

delicate ✩ jude bellingham

about: the massive hate you are getting on internet and the way jude stood by you, supporting you.

couple: jude bellingham x reader! singer

request: hey babyyyy! what do u think about a jude x reader (maybe olivia rodrigo fc) ?? xxx love u

face claim: olivia rodrigo

NOW: Jude’s Bellingham talks ‘Real Madrid’, His first World Cup’s impressions & His favorite Y/N’s songs.

comments ⬇️

user1 he’s so perfect ���� yn and him seemed like soulmates

user2 I REMEMBERED WHEN YN POINTED AT JUDE DURING GORGEOUS AND HE TOOK A PHOTO AND SHE WAS ALL GIGGLY

user3 yn once said “you’re so gorgeous, it actually hurts” and “they say home is where the heart is, but that's not where mine lives. you know I love a london boy.”

user4 @user3 im yn

user5 imagine being jude bellingham and having yn write her best love songs and best title tracks about you a DREAM

judebellingham has added to their story

ynusername

Liked by judebellingham, selenagomez, and 5.682.972 others

ynusername vampire song and video out now 🧛🏼. writing this song helped me sort through lots of feelings of regret, anger, and heartache. it's one of my favorite songs on the album and it felt very cathartic to finish. im so happy it's in your hands now and I hope it helps u deal with any bloodsuckers in your lite. all my thanks 4ever 🫶🏻

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judebellingham proud of you, vampie 🧛🏼🩸🥹🫶🏻

ynusername @judebellingham love u babs

user1 vampire is one of the best songs ever

user2 another song about another ex 🥱🙄

user3 @user2 literally let people write out their feelings or WHATEVER they want. obviously yall can only attack women for this tho...

user4 people calling yn boring or overrated for writing songs about her ex does not sit right w me …. like let her write about whatever she wants?? she’s 20??? all singers have songs about their ex’s???? stfu

user5 @user4 SPEAK. ON. IT

user6 "yn makes too much songs ab her ex" "all she write is break up songs, she’s so obsessed"

ok then stop listening to her songs 🤷🏻‍♀️

user7 whaaaaat 😭 why are there so many people mad that yn wrote some songs about her ex. meanwhile, there are men who only write songs about fucking hoes and using drugs and yet they still get praised for it 🥱

judebellingham

Liked by ynusername, masonmount, and 7.899.082 others

judebellingham date night with vampie to celebrate all of her achievements, proud of u ❤️‍🩹

View all 34.872 comments

ynusername 🧛🏻‍♀️🩸❤️‍🩹🧛🏼

user8 JUDE CALLING YN VAMPIE >>>>

user9 i hope i find someone who supports me the way jude supports yn

user10 ill always be soft for these two. its amazing how jude supports yn in any way he can and yn never forgets to save jude a seat. fucking POWER COUPLE!!!

user11 @user10 i just love them

user12 lets talk about the fact that at the 2020 grammys she didn’t feel like there was someone to celebrate with and now she has one and he helps her and supports her and take her on dates when she achieves more and more in her singing career 🥹

user13 yn and jude be like: happiest relationship of my life, so let’s go cheer for my breakup songs together 💕💞💓💗💖💘

ynusername

Liked by judebellingham, arianagrande, and 10.927.526 others

ynusername delicate is out now 🫧 surprise song for y’all, hope u like it 🫶🏻

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user14 delicate video really speaks to me. yn let go of the world's expectations of how she should act, smile and behave. once she did that, she was able to find who she was looking for. i’m shaking and crying, so so proud of our baby!!!!

user15 @user14 it’s already my favorite music video of her!!!! i love the lyrics 2

user16 these pics were taking by jude i’m CRYING and the lyrics… I JUST LOVE HIM EVEN MORE

user17 @user16 yeah 🥹 i’m so happy that she found someone that makes her feel like that

user18 delicate is one of the most beautiful songs yn has ever written, it’s so GENUINE.

[spideysbruh]

short n sweet

a/n- just pretend okay

~

liked by tchalamet, melissabarrera and 4,615,777 others

y/n please please please tonight!!

view all 87,716 comments

tryinyn DONT TELL ME HES IN THE MUSIC VIDEO OMFGGGGGG

florencepugh spicy!!

tchalamet best set ever all because of you

snoozeyn when timothee is nominated for an oscar for this >>>

timsgf it's a music video he can't get nominated. and it's a shitty one at that, he was the best part

snoozeyn aren't you like 60?

wallowsyn WAIT WAIT WAIT

@chalametupdates just tweeted- Timothée and Y/n behind the scenes of Y/ns new music video!

@ynscurtains replied- BEST MV EVERRR

@timmysgf replied- I wonder how he feels about his girlfriend sexualizing herself for streams

@horroryn replied- HE'S NOT GONNA DATE YOU STFU

liked by tchalamet, sabrinacarpenter and 6,177,388 others

y/n please please please!!! enjoy the video, bitches. the actor in this one is super sexy

view all 98,717 others

rachelzegler that actor is really good!

y/n ik I'm so glad he auditioned

tchalamet superrrrrr sexy

y/n wow full of yourself much?

tchalamet I was talking about you 😔

pleaseyn timmy as a crazy ass criminal is just too awesome

goodgracesyn "men suck" and whole time she's dating timmy LMAOO she's so real

liked by tchalamet, rachelzegler and 3,387,827 others

y/n short 'n' sweet is all yours tonight

view all 91,277 comments

tchalamet and you're all mine every night

mystyn I CLAIM COINCIDENCE ALREADY

ynsheadphones im so curious ab what the love songs ab timmy sound like

rachelzegler my favorite album ever

liked by y/n

timyn his comment 💀💀 so down bad

y/n just posted a story!

caption- damn maybe he should've released an album

liked by y/n, kidcudi and 6,716,773 others

tchalamet this beautiful girls album released today. bed chem is objectively my favorite, also juno.

view all 101,177 comments

supergraphicyn juno omg he's a freak

shortyn LISTEN TO GOOD GRACES AND LEARNNNNNN

y/n who's the cute guy in the white jacket- oh wait he's sitting next to me rn nvm LOL

tchalamet liked

daylightyn bed chem.. lucky girl

tchalamet just posted a story!

caption- date night 😍😍

liked by haileybieber, tchalamet, madisonbeer and 5,717,888 others

y/n so.. what's everyone's favorite ?

view all 103,287 comments

exesyn WHO MADE YOU WRITE DUMB AND POETIC

ynsdune BRO ITS SHAWN I SWEAR

tchalamet how does it feel to be this generations Shakespeare?

y/n liked

sabrinacarpenter I wish I made this wtf

y/n you've got it in you!!!

@companyyn just tweeted- WHOS THE CUTE BOY IN THE WHITE JACKET BITCH WHICH ONE

@beetleyn replied- also what fucking accent is she talking ab

@yn replied- idfk I needed a rhyme 🤷🏽‍♀️

@byeyn replied- HELLO!?!??! HEY GIRL

@infiniteyn replied- she's so fucking funny help

@laurieslaurence replied- he speaks french too so maybe that's what !!

@celebnews just tweeted- weeks after her new album released, Y/n L/n is seen happily with her boyfriend Timothée Chalamet. He was taking several pictures of her on a disposable camera. They stopped to say hi to fans and were apparently very kind and interactive.

@beliebyn replied- the way you started that scared the SHIT out of me omg never do that again celebnews

@comearoundyn replied- likely thing for them to do

@lovelyyn replied to @comearoundyn- what does your @ mean 😭😭😭😭

@modernyn replied- and we'll probably never see those pictures he took 💔💔

@mariasyn replied- ON TOP OF THE CHARTS AND LIVING HER BEST LIFE

liked by tchalamet, haileesteinfeld and 7,726,277 others

y/n to celebrate one month and all the love yall have given me, i wanted to release two other songs that i wrote after i finished the album. hope you enjoy!

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povyn BUSY WOMAN IS POP PERFECTION

paulsoneandonly oh goddd here we go, more shitty music 🙄

sweetyn I'm still not over coincidence girl WHO would do that to you

timsgf slim pickings is a crazy song to write when your bf is timothée

shortnyn can you shut the fuck up and get out of her comments for ONCE

liked by tchalamet

ynslipgloss I DIDNT WANT YOUR BITCH ASS ANYWAY🗣🗣 🎶

liked by y/n, florencepugh and 5,727,827 others

tchalamet my girl is on top of the world

comments on this post have been limited

y/n not us being goofy 🤣🤣

florencepugh my bestest friends !!

liked by rachelzegler, tchalamet and 4,817,132 others

y/n i am so grateful i could cry 💕💕✨️

view all 87,727 comments

rachelzegler you deserve it all and more my lovely

tchalamet forever proud of you pretty girl

bearyn remember when she was excited over her getting 100k views on her video 🥺😭😭 and now she's getting MILLIONS

ynsucks all thanks to her boyfriend

fuxkyn is she serious w this shit, she uses timmy for likes???

amyyn he posts her all the time too, so now what?

liked by tchalamet and 7,276,277 others

y/n vmas 😳😳😳

comments on this post have been limited

tchalamet i love you w so much of my heart that none is left to protest

y/n are you shakespeare

tchalamet nah i just made it up right now

liked by tchalamet, yourfriend and 7,727,266 others

y/n if you think they're looking at you... they're looking at me. happy anniversary my love 🥰💕💕

view all 120,187 comments

rachelzegler IM DEADDDDD

tchalamet happy anniversary my angel girl

timmysgf rude asl

laurieslaurence istg its the same person behind these accounts

timsgf what no

ynswaterbottle LMAOOOOOOOOO

lightupyn her old lyrics 🥺🥺😭😭

liked by y/n, zendaya and 8,277,265 others

tchalamet i ❤️ my talented girlfriend

view all 142,177 comments

horroryn HE SAID FUCK ALL YOU HATERSSSS AHHH YALL MAD

y/n why not uponeth me?

tchalamet liked

bedchemyn BYEEEE

tomholland2013 we need a double date soon!

modernyn MY PARENTSS

y/n I love you my darling boy

*

[puppym3]

heyaaa!!! if u still do requests, i have a request for minho! if u also havent done this one, but what if u do their song "i like it" about minho ??

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆

── .✦ 'i love that i like you, but i don't wanna love'

minho x reader

wc: 4.1k

warnings: MDNI! 18+, situationship, fwb, angsty, one-sided pining, minho is an asshole, "i can fix him" reader, awkward, reader is so delusional at the start it's funny, hurt comfort, late confessions, fluffy at end, i heal ur wounds dw, (lmk if i missed any)

a/n: omg anon ur trying to break my heart, as a hopeless romantic this might be my first ever sort of angsty piece. but either way i love "i like it" its literally been on repeat its probs one of my favorites from the album. i loved writing this so much you have no idea, THANK YOU for suggesting!

reminder to not be too delulu, these are just fictional stories that i write to show off my creative writing!! also i have a taglist if you're interested!!!!!

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆

The city lights glimmered through the window, casting a soft glow across Minho's apartment. The hum of the city outside was a constant reminder of the world continuing on, regardless of the turmoil within. You lay on the bed, staring up at the ceiling, Minho's arm draped lazily over your waist. The familiar scent of his cologne lingered in the air, a mix of comfort and longing that you had come to know too well.

"Hey," Minho's voice broke through your thoughts. He propped himself up on one elbow, looking down at you with those piercing eyes that always seemed to see right through you. "You okay?"

You forced a smile, nodding slightly. "Yeah, just thinking."

He sighed, brushing a strand of hair away from your face. "You know you can talk to me, right?"

That was the problem. Talking meant opening up, and opening up meant risking the fragile balance you had. Friends with benefits, a situationship, whatever it was, it worked because there were no labels, no expectations. At least, that's what you kept telling yourself.

"Minho," you started, hesitating. The words felt heavy on your tongue, a mix of hope and fear. "What are we doing?"

His expression softened, but there was a flicker of something—uncertainty, maybe?—in his eyes. "We're having fun, aren't we?"

"Yeah, but..." You sat up, pulling the sheets around you like a shield. "Is that all this is? Just fun?"

He ran a hand through his hair, a habit you had come to recognize as his way of stalling for time. "I like what we have, you know that. I just... I,"

You swallowed hard, the words stinging more than you wanted to admit. "And what if I want more?"

Minho's gaze dropped, his silence louder than any answer he could give. 'I like you'—if only it were that easy.

"I can't do this forever, Minho," you whispered, your voice barely audible. "I need to know if there's a future here, or if I'm just fooling myself."

He looked back at you, his eyes filled with a mix of regret and confusion. "I'm not ready for anything more right now."

The words hung in the air, a painful confirmation of your deepest fears. You nodded slowly, the ache in your chest spreading. "I understand."

As you got dressed and prepared to leave, Minho reached out, his hand catching yours. "Wait, don't go like this."

You paused, looking at him one last time. "I need to go think."

With that, you slipped out of his grasp, each step away from him feeling heavier than the last. The door closed behind you, the finality of it echoing in the empty hallway.

That night, you cried until your eyes were raw and your head ached until there were no tears left and all that was left was an empty feeling in your chest.

"What are you doing here?"

You saw your best friend standing in your doorway, her brow furrowed with worry. "I needed to see you, you didn't pick up any calls."

You felt the tears starting to form again as she pulled you into her arms. "I'm an idiot," you managed to say in between sobs.

She gently patted your back. "You're not an idiot, he's the idiot."

"He's not an idiot," you said softly.

She held you at arm's length, looking into your eyes. "Then tell me what happened. What has your eyes all puffy at 9 in the morning?"

"He wants to be just friends, that's all." you sighed.

"What?" her brows furrowed. "I thought you liked each other? What's stopping him?"

"I asked what he wants to be, and he said 'he's not ready for anything'."

She groaned, "he doesn't deserve you"

You let out a deep breath. "He doesn't, does he? But, I like him."

"Why are you putting yourself through this?" She said with worry in her eyes as she traced circles on your back.

"I wanted to fight for him, but every time I end up in his bed, I hurt myself more."

"Fight for him?"

You nodded slowly, your resolve hardening as you said the words aloud. "I'm going to fight for him."

She rolled her eyes, a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "And how are you going to do that?"

You hesitated, realizing that you hadn't thought that far ahead. "I guess I'll... call him? No, no that would be awkward... maybe I'll just stop by his apartment and—"

She raised an eyebrow, looking at you pointedly. "And what, you're gonna sleep with him again? What would that do?"

Your cheeks flushed. "Okay, no. Maybe I'll take him out to coffee? No, that's too casual. Maybe dinner?"

"Dinner would be good."

"Dinner would be good," you agreed, a hint of nervousness creeping into your voice.

Your best friend put her arm around your shoulder and gave you a reassuring squeeze. "You shouldn't be doing this, but I support you."

"Thank you."

She shook her head, laughing softly. "If it doesn't work, we're gonna eat so much comfort food tonight."

That afternoon, you paced around your apartment, phone in hand as you tried to muster up the courage to call Minho. Your best friend's words echoed in your mind, reminding you of the risk you were taking. With a deep breath, you hit the call button.

As the phone rang, you felt your heart pounding in your chest, your palms growing clammy. After what felt like an eternity, the familiar sound of Minho's voice filled your ear.

"Hey, it's me." You paused, gathering your thoughts. "I wanted to apologize for the other night. I was upset and I shouldn't have taken it out on you."

You could hear the hesitance in his voice as he replied, "No, it's alright. I'm sorry, too."

"Can I take you out for dinner? I think we need to talk about things." You held your breath, waiting for his response.

"Yeah... I think that'd be okay," he said after a moment, "When?"

"I'm free tonight," you offered, trying to hide the hopeful note in your voice.

There was a long silence before Minho spoke again, "Okay, I'll see you at 6."

You hung up, the finality of the words hitting you. Was this your last chance?

The minutes passed by slowly, your anticipation building with each passing minute. Finally, 6 o'clock came around, and you made your way to the restaurant. You took a deep breath, steadying your nerves as you pushed open the doors.

You spotted Minho seated at a table, and made your way over to him. He stood as you approached, smiling.

"Hey," he said softly, his voice sending shivers down your spine.

"Hey." You swallowed, trying to find your words. "I, I've missed you."

Minho looked away, a mix of emotions on his face. "It's been a day."

You laughed, trying to ease the tension. "Oh, right."

There was a moment of awkward silence before Minho finally spoke again, his voice barely a whisper.

"I think I missed you too."

You looked at him, the realization dawning on you. He had missed you too. It was something, he at least thought about you during day. "Minho—"

He looked up, meeting your gaze. "What is it?"

"I just..." You took a deep breath. "I don't want to lose what we have. But if that means being friends, then that's what we'll do. Because I can't stand losing you completely."

He stared at you for a moment, his eyes filled with surprise. Then he nodded slowly. "I don't want to lose what we have as well."

Your chest ached, but you smiled anyway, grateful for the small victory. You would be fine with it. You could be fine with it if that's all you could ever get.

"But," you started, an idea coming to your mind, "if I get a boyfriend, we'll stop whatever this is."

Minho blinked, the words sinking in. He took a moment, contemplating. Then he nodded slowly.

"Okay," he said. "Okay."

His expression was unreadable, was he upset? Or was he fine with the idea of never speaking to you again?

Your heart sank at the thought, did he really feel nothing at all for you?

You forced yourself to smile, trying to hide the ache in your chest. "Thank you," you said softly.

Minho smiled, but you could tell it was forced. You excused yourself and went to the washroom to splash cold water on your face, trying to stop the tears that threatened to spill.

You had to leave, you had to get out of here. You made your way outside, the cool night air helping to calm you.

You leaned against the wall, taking a shaky breath as you tried to hold back the tears. You closed your eyes, taking deep breaths, trying to calm your racing heartbeat.

You forced yourself to come to reality with all of this, you ran home without thinking twice. You had to end all of this now and leave before you ended up in his bed again.

You slammed your front door shut, locking the deadbolt and falling on the ground crying. The tears wouldn't stop flowing, it felt like a river of emotion that was overwhelming you. You were so scared of losing him, of not having him in your life. You sat on the ground for what felt like an eternity, trying to make sense of your emotions.

Getting rid of him now was the only way, the only way you'd survive without being broken-hearted. You dragged yourself to bed and cried yourself to sleep, clutching the pillow and blankets like they were your lifeline.

A week had already passed. You did your best to stay busy, trying to distract yourself from thinking about Minho. You had blocked his number, so you had no idea if he had tried to reach out to you at all.

Your best friend had been beside you to keep you from losing your mind completely or unblocking his number.

The two of you decided to watch movies all weekend long to take your minds off the situation, which helped for a while, but now that it was Monday and you were back at work, you felt like a walking zombie.

Your thoughts drifted to Minho throughout the day, wondering what he was doing, if he had moved on yet, or if he still thought of you at all.

You pushed the thoughts out of your head, trying to focus on your work. But it was no use. He was constantly in your mind, even though you knew there was no point in thinking of him.

You closed your eyes, letting your mind wander back to when things were still good between the two of you, the feeling of his tender hands on your body and his soft lips against yours. You remembered his words, 'I like what we have.' Did he mean it? Did he still think that after everything that happened? Or were they just words?

You opened your eyes, tears forming again as you stared out the window, lost in thought.

The clock seemed to move agonizingly slowly, but eventually, your workday came to an end, and you gathered your things to head home. You took a deep breath before heading out the door, bracing yourself for another long, lonely night.

You walked slowly through the dark streets, lost in your thoughts. You came across a familiar intersection, and you hesitated, memories of Minho flooding your mind.

The two of you used to take this route back to your apartment when he would walk you home from work. You stood in the middle of the empty intersection, staring at the stoplight, debating on whether to continue home or take the long way to your apartment, the way the two of you used to take.

You shook your head, trying to clear your thoughts. It was silly, getting hung up on someone that didn't even care.

You crossed the street, heading in the direction of your apartment. You glanced down the familiar route, memories of the two of you talking about the stupidest things.

You closed your eyes and sighed, a pang of longing hitting you. You missed him so much, more than you had ever expected.

You kept your eyes closed, your mind replaying memories of Minho as you walked home. It hurt to think about, but it also hurt not to think about him.

The two of you were inseparable, even when you fell in love with him, he enabled your feelings, kissing you, touching you, and sharing nights with you.

He was so easy to love. And he was so easy to lose.

You opened your eyes as you reached your apartment, the familiar surroundings providing you with a sense of comfort.

You trudged up the stairs, feeling more drained than you had all week. You reached your apartment, the familiar walls surrounding you like a warm embrace.

You threw your keys onto the table, slumping down in a chair and closing your eyes.

You breathed in the comforting scent of home, the ache in your chest still lingering, but you felt a sense of calm wash over you. You were home.

You sat for a few minutes, just enjoying the feeling of being at home after a long day at work. The quiet was comforting, a contrast to the busy, loud environment you'd spent your day in. You sat with your eyes closed for a few minutes, allowing your thoughts to settle.

You heard a faint knock on your front door. Your heart stopped, and you shot up out of your chair, hesitantly walking to the door.

You paused, taking a deep breath before opening it, knowing you couldn't keep it locked forever.

"Minho." The word slipped out before you could stop it, your voice a mix of surprise and pain.

Minho's face was somber, his expression unreadable as he spoke.

"I think I love you."

His voice was soft, the words tinged with sadness. You looked into his eyes, seeing the pain there.

You took a deep breath, your heart aching. You opened your mouth to reply, but he continued, the words pouring out of him.

"I'm sorry. I didn't think it would feel so painful to not see you, or hear your voice, or touch you. I just couldn't stop thinking about you, about how you made me feel."

You couldn't hold back the tears any longer as his words filled your ears, your chest aching more than it had in a long time.

You bit your lip, trying to stay calm. Is this real, or are you dreaming? Did he come back to fuck with your feelings?

Your heart pounded in your chest, a mixture of pain and happiness flooding you as you looked into his eyes, trying to see if he was sincere.

His face was pained, his expression vulnerable as he stood in your doorway. You hesitated, trying to find the words to say.

He stepped closer to you, closing the space between you, the proximity causing your heart to skip a beat.

"I liked what we had, that part is true. But I never realized how I felt until you disappeared from my life."

You tried to breathe evenly as he reached out to take your hands, his touch gentle as he spoke again.

"I know I've been selfish this entire time, but I miss you. I miss everything about you."

His words pierced through your heart, leaving you speechless. You were frozen in place, trying to comprehend his words.

Minho closed his eyes, a small smile forming on his face. "I missed you."

The two of you stood in silence for a few seconds, his hands holding yours tightly as he stared into your eyes, his gaze softening as you finally managed to reply.

"I missed you, too."

Without hesitation, you grabbed his face and pulled him in, crashing your lips together as his hands pulled you close to him, holding you as if you would disappear any second.

Your hands moved from his face to the nape of his neck as the kiss grew deeper, his lips parting as the two of you explored each other's mouths.

Minho's hands roamed your body as yours did his, a familiar warmth spreading through your body as you gave yourself to him once again.

You broke apart for air, panting as you tried to catch your breath. The two of you stood there in your doorway for a moment, catching your breaths and staring at each other, neither one wanting to let go.

You were still unsure of where your relationship stood, but as Minho's hand reached for your waist once more and pulled you close, his lips capturing yours again, all your worries seemed to disappear.

He guided you into your apartment, shutting the door behind him and backing you against the wall. Your hands found the back of his head once again as you melted into his touch, his kisses filled with longing.

His hand wandered up your back and into your hair as his other hand rested on your hip, a soft groan escaping his lips as the kiss grew deeper. You wrapped your leg around his, your body pressing against him as you held him close, trying to convey the emotions you couldn't put into words.

After a few minutes, you finally broke the kiss, looking into his eyes as you both panted softly. Your chest was pounding as you looked up at him, trying to read his expression.

He smiled softly at you, his face flushed from the intensity of the kiss. His eyes met yours and held your gaze, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he took in your flushed cheeks and disheveled hair.

He reached up, gently tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, his thumb caressing your cheek as he leaned in and pressed a soft kiss against your forehead.

You felt a familiar warmth spreading through your chest at his touch, a small smile forming on your lips as you reached up and wrapped your arms around his neck. You leaned into him, your chest pressing against his as you hugged him tightly, your cheek resting against his.

He hugged you back, his arms wrapping around you as you nuzzled your nose against his neck, breathing in his familiar scent. The two of you stayed like that for a few moments, enjoying each other's warmth and closeness, the silence broken only by the soft sound of his heart beating.

The two of you stood in each other's arms for what felt like an eternity, but could have been minutes or hours. Time didn't exist anymore as the two of you held onto each other, neither one wanting to let go.

Finally, you reluctantly pulled away, looking into his eyes as you spoke. "We should probably talk properly."

His eyes searched yours, his expression serious as he nodded, a hint of hesitation in his voice. "Okay," he said softly.

You nodded, stepping away from him and moving to the living room, the distance between the two of you growing again. You sat down on the couch, your hands resting in your lap as you stared down at them.

Minho sat down next to you, his body tense as he watched you.

You looked up at him, meeting his eyes as you gathered your thoughts. You opened your mouth to speak, but the words seemed to get caught in your throat, your voice coming out barely louder than a whisper. "I've loved you ever since we started sleeping together."

Minho's eyes widened slightly as he stared at you, his mouth slightly agape as your words registered with him. You felt a familiar pang of sadness in your chest as you remembered that time.

He looked down, his voice barely above a whisper. "Why didn't you say anything?"

You bit your lip, struggling to find the right words. "I thought you knew. I would always bring up going further with you, but you dismissed me."

You looked down, fidgeting with your hands as you tried to hold back tears. "I just thought things would change if we put labels on things."

The silence in the air grew deafening as you looked up, your heart pounding as you saw tears forming in Minho's eyes. He reached out and placed his hand on your shoulder, his touch light and reassuring.

"But I want those labels now, all of them," he whispered. "I'm so sorry I made you feel that way."

The tears that had been threatening to fall finally began to trickle down your cheeks as you looked up at him. "Minho, I thought you felt nothing for me."

He reached out and gently brushed the tears away from your face, his eyes filled with concern as he stared into your eyes.

Minho took a deep breath before continuing. "I know I've hurt you, but I never want to see you cry again."

Your chest ached as you tried to process his words. It was as if everything you had gone through since the 'break-up' was suddenly erased, as if none of it had mattered. You stared into his eyes, trying to figure out what to say.

Minho's lips curved up into a small smile as he cupped your cheeks, wiping away the tears with his thumb as he gazed into your eyes.

You reached up and wrapped your hands around his, holding onto them tightly as you felt a familiar warmth spreading through your chest at his touch.

"I want to try and start again, as your boyfriend," he said softly, placing a soft kiss on the back of your hand.

You felt your heart racing as the words left his mouth, your chest tightening as he looked into your eyes, searching for your reaction.

You took a deep breath, your eyes closing for a second as you tried to steady yourself, the words that left his mouth feeling almost unreal. "Minho," you breathed. "Is this real? Are you serious?"

A smile broke out onto his face as he nodded. "If you'll let me, yes."

Without saying a word, you grabbed his shirt, pulling him into a kiss as your heart raced, the tears on your face now dried.

Minho kissed you back with equal intensity, his hands cupping your face as your hands tangled themselves into his hair. The kiss was soft and filled with longing as the two of you lost yourselves in the moment.

As your lips parted, you felt Minho's forehead pressed against yours as his hands traced down to the small of your back, holding you close. You closed your eyes and smiled, relishing the feeling of being in his arms once again.

You wrapped your arms around his neck as he held you, the two of you taking in the feeling of each other. It had only been a week, but it felt like a lifetime had passed.

"I'm your girlfriend now?" you asked hesitantly, still not sure if this was all real.

Minho laughed softly as he nodded. "You're my girlfriend," he confirmed, his voice filled with affection.

You laughed and leaned back, taking in his expression and memorizing the look in his eyes, feeling a warmth in your heart you hadn't felt for a while.

He suddenly wrapped his arms around your waist, picking you up with ease as you shrieked in surprise. He carried you to the bed and gently placed you down on the mattress as if you were made of glass, the mattress shifting from the weight of his body as he moved to lie beside you.

"What do we do now?" you asked softly as his hands cupped your face, his thumb brushing lightly against your lips as he leaned in for a tender kiss.

When he broke away, you found yourself expecting more, but he simply smiled at you as he laid back down and pulled you closer, wrapping an arm around your waist to hold you.

"This is all I want to do," he whispered, nuzzling your neck and kissing it lightly. "I want to fall asleep holding you and wake up beside you in the morning."

His words were tender as they reached your ears, making your heart melt.

"Okay," you breathed, pressing a kiss on his cheek and turning around so your back was facing his chest. You snuggled closer to him as he pulled you close, his hands resting on your abdomen and holding you tightly as he buried his face into your neck, kissing it.

You breathed in deeply, his scent surrounding you as your heart swelled with affection.

"Good night, I love you."

His voice was soft, but you could feel the emotion behind the words. You let out a soft sigh as your eyelids fluttered shut, the feeling of Minho holding you lulling you to sleep.

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆

taglist for my beauties : @loverbangchan, @reignessance, @imperfectlyperfectprincess1, @armystay89, @ihrtlix, @jiyeonslays, @lovestaysblogs, @jeyelleohe, @celebration88

[fortheloveoffanfic]

Broken Chords: The hardest part is who we are.

Hozier x fem!reader

Author's note: okay, so in my mind, Y/N an actress BUT please feel free to imagine her however you like.

Summary: After his concert in New York and a private moment shared in his dressing room, Y/n and Andrew are confronted with the reality of their situation, and one party isn't willing to go on like that.

Warnings: SMUT/NSFW, Angst

Part 1 Part 2

He’s determined that they can never be anything more than whatever they are right now; two people that exist in each other’s orbit without ever truly meeting, wound up in something that hurts too much to be worth it but feels too good to let go of. It's like a blade in a clenched fist, splicing through flesh and grating bone. It's like a full-bodied port in the dead of winter.

Exes with benefits? He knows that its the best term to describe their state of affairs, but it makes Andrew feel so twenty-something.

They’ve unofficially adopted some sort of arrangement that involves ignoring the elephant in the room and enjoying each other's company just enough to get by; since Y/n left Ireland after the wedding – and their tryst at the hotel – they’ve seen each other exactly three times. First, it was two weeks later, when he was in Manchester for a night while she was, then again in Los Angeles when her meeting with a director coincided with his meeting with another songwriter for a collaboration. And now, tonight, in New York. He’d heard from a mutual friend she's going to be home for a few weeks – because after nearly five years of being mixed up with each other, so many of their friends are shared – asked his manager to run her tickets to his show at The Bowery.

And of course, she came.

He spots her when he’s in the middle of one of the new songs, one he wrote about her. Because even if they’re mostly over, she’s usually at the front of his mind when he puts pen to paper. A stray comment on his part has led to word getting around about how most of the upcoming album is about an ex, and now he feels a little guilty about saying that so freely after he struggled to talk about their relationship when they were still in it.

He wonders if she's heard about his little slip up, if she's as mad at him as he is at himself.

She’s standing at the railing guarding the mezzanine and there’s a plastic cup in her hand, he doesn’t even have to be there to know what’s in it. There are probably gonna be pictures tomorrow, paired with speculations, because people have been speculating for years. But he’ll play them off, and so will she. It used to be a point of contention for them; Y/n was growing tired of hiding, so much so that she said it felt like an insult. Things are different now, though;

Tight lips and dodged questions are encouraged, especially by her. It's almost as if she's ashamed, Andrew thinks, and as much as he tries to not take it personally, he can't help the way his heart does an awkward twist when she says something like; "I just don't think anyone should know what we're doing, you know?"

Would being with him again really be that bad? Andrew avoids asking himself that question, because it reminds him of their tiff in the hotel room;

"Would it really be that bad? Being married to me; would it really be that bad?"

He still isn't the marrying type, the prospect of it sickens him the way looking down the barrel of a gun might.

But he is the being with her type.

Ironically, while Y/n has been doing everything to make sure their entanglement stays hidden, he's just started wondering what it would be like if they’d never hid at all. What if everyone knew that she was there because he wanted her there? What if they knew that he was meeting her eyes when he glances at the area above the main floor?

When the set is over and he’s through with humoring the audience for a bit longer, Andrew returns to the backstage area with the intention of seeking her out. He’d asked her to meet him there, but after a quick look around he can’t seem to find her. Even when he asks his manager, a couple of the assistants and some of his bandmates, they all claim to have not seen her recently. There aren't any recent texts or missed calls from Y/n either, and that’s really all it takes for his mind to jump to the worst.

Has she changed her mind on him?

She can’t do that. Well, she can, but if she’s gonna tear his world apart, a warning would have been nice.

Andrew is so defeated by her absence that he halfheartedly dismisses Alex’s offer to have a drink with the rest of the band, mumbling a lie about having a headache just so he can retreat to his dressing room and be alone. He doesn’t even think about why the lights are on when he pushes the door open.

“Well, that took you long enough.”

Andrew jumps when he hears her voice. Y/n is sitting on the chair at the long, barren dressing table. She carelessly sets her phone down as he enters the room, and Andrew shuts the door before responding. “What the fuck, Y/n. I’ve been looking for you, I thought you left.”

“You asked me to stay,” she knits her brows.

“I asked you to meet me backstage,” he corrects.

“This is backstage,” Y/n determines, “besides,” she shrugs, “I thought it would have been weird if I hung around back there. Its…..that’s not what this is,” her voice drops an octave lower, and a pang of guilt stabs at his chest. He knows she doesn’t mean anything malicious by her words, but it does sting.

Andrew crosses the room to stand beside where she's sitting, leaning against the table. “Right,” he licks his lips, “ehm, did you have a good time?”

Y/n grins, “I did,” she takes his hand in both of her smaller ones, stroking his knuckles with her thumbs before starting to absently massage it. For a moment, Andrew almost forgets that they aren’t actually an item anymore; this is exactly what the first few minutes after a show used to look like. “You were fantastic out there….you always are. They love you.”

“I like it more when you love me,” he elicits, raising his free hand to touch the side of her face.

“Andrew,” Y/n sighs, turning away from his touch, “don’t do that.”

“Do what?” He scoffs, suddenly defensive.

“Act like….” A sound of irritation escapes her throat and she shakes her head, “like we’re something.”

“We are something,” he counters, matching her growing frustration.

Y/n doesn’t let his hand go, but her ministrations slow, “not that kind of something.”

Andrew turns his hand over in hers, holding onto one as the other drops to her lap. Gently, he urges her up, and slips his arm around to the small of her back. His fingers toy with the lace of her black blouse and he bends his head a little to search her gaze. “Can we not do this tonight? Please?” He drops his face lower just as she tips her chin a bit higher, and his forehead is almost touching hers.

Y/n’s eyes soften and she reaches up to settle her palm on his shoulder, the roughness of his jacket – the same one he wore in London the night everything started falling apart – letting it linger there for a few seconds before shifting it up to cup the side of his neck. Ther lips lock in an ardent kiss, that starts slow, only growing more impassioned when his fingers curl against her back as he presses her closer. Extracting his hand from hers, Andrew places it on Y/n’s hip so he can switch their positions, easily trapping her between his body and the table.

His hand on her hip slides downwards, skimming the length of her short skirt before he slips it between her thighs. Her skin is soft and warm, and when he brushes the lace of her underwear, Y/n shivers, the quaking breath falling past Andrew’s lips. Suddenly, he isn’t worrying about optics and nursing the ache of something just past them, he’s in the moment, right there. The lingering adrenaline from being on stage just twenty minutes earlier is being harbored by their proximity and the first traces of moisture pooling just over his fingers. Already, he can feel himself responding; the zipper of his jeans feels restricting and his breathing quickens.

It doesn’t matter if he last had her the night before or a month ago, his yearning for her never wavers. Andrew could spend the rest of his life losing himself in her.

Y/n pushes off his denim jacket, and it hits the door with a soft thud that isn’t acknowledged and then flattens her hands on his chest, gently urging him into the chair she'd been sitting in earlier. Clumsily, he stumbles backwards, pulling her into his lap as he falls into the chair.

Hastily, he reaches for her cheek again, large hand dwarfing her face. Some of her hair is caught under his palm, but Andrew doesn’t spend any effort brushing it away. Instead, he cruises his thumb along her ruby stained lips; he loves that colour on her. “You look so beautiful tonight,” he rasps, “I’m glad you came,” he adds.

Her eyes move quickly as they search his, and Y/n cradles his face in her small hands, the prickle of his beard prodding at the soft skin. She furrowed her brows at his words, not quite knowing what to say; she doesn't want to ruin their night but she doesn't want to make things any more confusing than they already are.

If that's even possible.

“I wouldn't rather be anywhere else,” she finds herself saying it without much effort being expended to hold it back. It's the truth; she wouldn't want to be anywhere else.

Andrew looks like he's going to say something else, and she holds her breath for it – but he doesn't. Sliding his hand forward, he threads his fingers through her hair, guiding her face towards his. Under her skirt, Andrew shoves the crotch of her underwear aside and introduces two of his long fingers to her center, curling them slightly.

Stirring her hips, Y/n moans against his lips while gathering fistfuls of his printed t-shirt in a white knuckled grip. His lips are hot on her neck, leaving marks that she’ll have to cover up tomorrow and her head is tilted to the side, allowing him access. When his thumb swirls around her sensitive nub, Y/n gasps and presses her cheek to the top of his head.

“Andy….” She rasps, reaching for the hem of his t-shirt so she can slip her hands under it, cool palm's against the heat of his chest. Eager for more, she grinds against his fingers as he introduces another. “I wanna feel you….” She pleads, nails grazing his skin.

When he finally extracts his fingers in favor of tugging her underwear down her thighs. In a series of clumsy motions, the lacy thing is thrown to the floor and Y/n reaches for the buckle of his belt, hastily undoing it before opening up the button and zipper of his pants. They don’t shove it all the way down, just enough for her to ease herself down on him.

“Fuck sweetheart,” Andrew hisses, fingers digging into her ample hips. With a bruising grip, he guides her into a steady pace. The way she’s wrapped around him is dizzying, and everytime she moans his name, in that breathy way that she does, he swears he inches a little closer to heaven.

She’ll never get over the way he fills her up, they way it feels like they’re two puzzle pieces snapping together. “Andrew….” she croons, half a praise, half a desperate whine. Clutching his t-shirt in one hand and cupping his neck with the other, she tips her forehead against his. Their eyes meet, in the haze of lust blown pupils and tangled lashes and Andrew tips his chin slightly to bring his lips closer to hers, almost touching them but not quite.

“That’s it, honey. You feel so fucking good wrapped around me like this,” he praises through gritted teeth when she quickens the erotic roll of her hips. Every crude compliment is achingly familiar, music that Y/n is so used to hearing that doesn’t think she could ever go without it – the world can have the poet in him, but this is only for her.

His palm journeys up her hip, tracing the contour of her body over the thin lace of her blouse before eventually grabbing her breast, giving the flesh and eager squeeze. There’s something to be said about the way he appreciates her body; as if she were a work of art conjured up just for him.

A loud moan reverberates in the small room when his lips connect with her collar bone, and Y/n’s knees buckle. “Almost there,” Andrew gasps, heady words spilt on her skin, “come on, sweetheart,” he encourages, bucking his hips.

Her breaths are heavy and erratic, and Andrew can feel the pound of her heart against his chest, matching the excited thump of his own. Y/n’s name is like a little prayer on his lips, a mantra, as she finally crashes down. Limbs shaking, words muddled and head thrown back. His lips find her neck again, muffling a strained against her throbbing pulse as he finds his own, euphoric release. His grip on her tightens, holding her as close as possible.

“God,” Y/n heaves, head falling into the crook of his neck. Just then, Andrew’s hold slackens and he envelopes her in a loose embrace. He lolls his cheek against the top of her head and sighs softly as their breathing slowly evens out.

He knows they should probably untangle themselves after a while but holding her like this, it feels like the closest he’s been to home in a damn long time. Even his own house doesn't feel like this anymore – not since she left. And it isn’t just the familiarity of her curves, or the comfort of her voice; its the security of proximity. The way he can feel everything she holds for him coming off her, the way warmth oozes from a fire. She’s safe, she cares.

He doesn’t have to think too hard when they’re together, his mind is empty and quiet – in the best way.

He wants to tell her he misses this, he misses feeling her warmth against him as he falls asleep. Hearing her breathing so close to his ear, the proof that she's real and not just some figment of a weary artist's imagination. He misses the way they'd just lay together after they're spent, her fingers tracing circles over heartbeat, his trailing up and down her back.

The way she'd raise off his chest and use the back of her hand to brush hair away away from his face before leaning down to kiss him.

He's had it with other women – before and after Y/n – but it doesn't come close to the way it feels with her.

Because it's more than the simple pleasure of being with another, it's the great privilege of getting to love her.

“I-”

“Hey, man I – oh, shit,” Alex tugs the door shut faster than he'd pulled it open.

In a series of stumbles and hasty movements, Y/n scampers from his lap, and Andew barely resists the urge to tighten his grip and pull back down onto him.

“Sorry! I didn't know you were…..” Alex trails off, “you said you had a headache and one of the assistants said she saw you go in here.”

Andrew stutters, standing to pull up his jeans while Y/n steals away to the small bathroom to get cleaned up. “Ehm….it's….” He doesn't want to say it's alright, because it would be far from the truth, but its also his fault for not locking the door.

But they shouldn't have been doing that in there anyway. Though, he and Y/n seem to have a knack for doing things they probably shouldn't.

“Gimme fifteen,” Andrew eventually manages. He doesn't catch Alex’s response, he isn't too concerned with it anyway. Andrew is more focused on what Y/n will think, what she'll say. She's been so adamant about keeping things quiet that he isn't sure if the threat of being discovered will be enough to drive her way.

He isn't sure because his Y/n wouldn't have cared; they'd been caught sneaking off way too many times for her to be phased. Hell, if they were still together, Alex wouldn't have even come looking.

But everything's different now – she's different now. She's not his Y/n.

Andrew brings his fist to the door in three short knocks. “I'm sorry,” implores when she doesn't respond, “I didn't mean for that to happen.” He sighs heavily, waiting for her to say something, “I didn't think anyone would come back here.”

And she still doesn't say anything.

Soundlessly, Andrew presses the side of his fist to the door while planting his free hand on the edge of the door frame. “Darlin’,” he breaths, hanging his head, “please come-”

“Don't call me that,” Andrew stumbles forward a little when Y/n unlocks the door and yanks the door open.

Andrew scoffs, pushing his hair out of his face with one sweep of his fingers, when she slips out from under his raised arm, “that's what you open the door for?” Y/n doesn't respond with anything more than a huff and a shake of her head as she collects her phone and purse off the table. “Come on,” he reaches for her arm, “please.”

She sighs, dropping her shoulders. “What?” Y/n turns to face him, lips pressed together and eyes sullen.

“I should've locked the-”

“Its not about that, Andrew,” she glaces away, briefly catching a glimpse of them in the mirror. His long fingers loosely gripping her arm while they stand barely a foot apart. It feels strange seeing herself like that; she's never wanted to put distance between them, ever. Even after she left him, all Y/n ever wanted to do was bridge the oceans between them, wade through whatever had ripped them from each other and find her way back to him.

Its why she opens herself up to him every time they see each other, some of him is better than none at all.

But being caught changes everything; it makes her the girl who keeps going back to a man who won't commit. Pathetic, foolish.

That's what she sees staring back at her.

A silly girl who's lovelorn for a man who keeps telling her - with his own words and his own mouth - that he will never want the same things he does. He will never return the kind of love she has for him.

That girl is staring at her, eyes brimmed with stinging tears, asking her why she's wasting the best years of her life fucking this man in a dressing room. In hotel rooms booked under an alias. In the back of her rental parked near the beach at ten pm.

He is not going to change, and neither is she. But this can end.

“Let's just talk,” Andrew begs, “or, or, come for a drink with us. You're friends with the band –”

“What is this to you?” She glances back at him, watery eyes struggling to keep years worth of heartbreak at bay.

Stunned, Andrew deserts her arm and runs his hand over her hair. “It's…..” the closet thing he has to the best three years of his life. It's the thing that's killing him slowly, whether or not he can admit.

It's a thing so undefined that he isn't sure he has a word for it, but given the alternative, he's willing to trudge on.

Beginning again, Andrew emits a frustrated sigh, “it's….doesn’t it matter. You're the one that doesn't want us to be together – you broke up with me,” his tone hardens. He doesn't want to have the fight against, not when they've finally found some steady footing, no mind it's more of a liferaft than a boat in the middle of a pitch black sea. It's still something, it's all that's keeping him from going under.

“I am not having this conversation again,” she hasn't been shouting, but for some reason her words still sound pained and raw.

“I'm just saying,” Andrew pinches the bridge of his nose, “I was good with the way things were,” he spats, forgoing every thought he'd had on stage earlier, all in the name of self preservation.

“You wouldn't tell people I was your girlfriend–”

“Our friends knew –”

“Just barely,” Y/n scoffs, “you kept telling everyone that we were “seeing where it goes,” it had been three years; what more did you need to see?”

He doesn't have an answer, and, at a loss for words, he just stands there. He wants to say something, slap another bandaid over the still-bleeding bullet hole, but nothing comes. That sort of callousness can't be excused or explained.

Andrew suddenly remembers that his brother once called him a commitment phobe, so maybe those are the words. But a reason still isn't an excuse, it still isn't an apology. It still isn't a hall pass to run someone's heart through a woodchipper.

Y/n stands in front of him, a shell of the woman he'd held in his hungry hands earlier, and Andrew figures he's something of the same. It's all forgotten now; her gentle massaging of his hands – cause she must be the only person he's ever told that they get sore after playing all night. The way her chest melted into his, her breath tickling his collar bone.

It's all gone now, a memory that feels so long past him that he isn't remembering right. Her lips must've been sweeter that he's recalling, she must've felt warmer because there's a chill hanging in the air and he hadn't been cold then.

Those people aren't them – or maybe its the other way around. He can’t get it to make sense in his head, but it doesn’t matter anyway. It doesn’t give him something useful to say; its not going to make her stay.

Surprisingly, Y/n closes the space between them with a couple steps, and she stands on her toes to kiss the corner of his lips. “You don’t have to say anything, Andy,” his heart contracts; why does it feel like the last time she’s calling him that?

Is he going to be Andrew to her from now on; entirely cold and formal? Or is she just never going to say his name?

“But um…..maybe we shouldn’t do this again,” she says, settling on her feet.

“No,” desperately, Andrew takes her hand, “please.”

He isn’t even crawling back this time; this isn’t him crawling back to her. This is him pounding down the door, begging to be let in.

But its closed – locked even.

“Not this time,” already, he misses his name on her tongue. Y/n’s hand slips out of his – centimeter by centimeter – until the barest tips of their fingers are touching. And, more than anything else he’s wanted in a damn long time, he wants to take a step forward and take her hand again.

He wants her to turn around and see the emotion threatening to spill out of his eyes as the world gives out under his feet.

Andrew wants to beg her to stay – but it won’t make a different because the defending sound of the doorknob’s click rattles in his ear as she pulls it shut, and all he’s left with is a cloud of jasmine perfume and a hollowness in his chest as he slumps against the table.

[riality-check]

tw for mentions of substance abuse (part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7)

ao3

Steve Harrington has been awake for fifty four hours. With luck, he'll be able to eke out another eighteen. Three days seems to be the sweet spot, even if he only makes it there half the time and, of that half, it only works half the time.

It's better than nothing.

Maybe four days is the sweet spot. Ninety six is close to one hundred, and that seems like a good omen.

Omens don't really matter though. What matters is staying awake.

So, Steve chugs his coffee and walks into the conference room. Coffee isn't enough, not nearly, but it'll do until he gets desperate enough to take something.

He really does try to only take them when he's desperate. It's easier that way, to just do it when he feels like he needs to rather than measuring dosages and remembering times. Hours start to blur around hour forty of being awake.

He walks in, sits down in the chair closest to the door, and is met with a withering glare from Eddie Munson.

Listen. Steve isn't happy about this either, but at least he doesn't look like he stepped in dog shit on the way here. Then again, Steve doesn't have the luxury of ever looking truly unhappy.

Eddie is a rock star. Mean is part of his brand, while mean is the antithesis to Steve's.

Whatever.

"Are you kidding me?" Eddie says, still staring at him, but Steve knows he's not who he's asking.

"He's the best person for the job," Chrissy, Eddie's manager, says.

"We don't need him."

Someone taps Steve's left shoulder. He turns to see Jeff, the lead singer of Corroded Coffin, give him a warm smile.

"Nice to meet you, Steve," he says, and Steve shakes his proffered hand.

"Happy to help," he says, and it's only half a lie.

The drummer and the bassist - Steve would probably be able to remember their names if he wasn't so exhausted - wave their hellos from a few seats away.

"Hi, Steve," Chrissy says.

He takes another swig of his coffee and gives her a little wave in response.

"We don't need a pop singer to write lyrics for us," Eddie says, still not letting this go.

"Yes, you do," Steve says. He sets his coffee cup down on the table and opens the folder he brought with him. "I read through the lyrics of every one of your songs."

"You didn't even listen to them?"

"Would have taken too much time."

That's a lie. Listening, even with the lengthy guitar solos, probably would have taken less time. But Steve needs something to fill the hours when he's supposed to be asleep, and reading, that slow process with its ample, awakening frustration, is the perfect thing.

"You became so much less interesting after your first album," he says. "Every one of your songs talks about the same thing. Conquering evil, killing demons, blah blah blah."

"That's what's in right now," Eddie snaps.

Out of the corner of his eye, Steve catches the drummer and Chrissy make the same motion. They pinch the bridges of their noses, clearly frustrated.

Steve sees why Chrissy wanted to talk to him.

"It is," he concedes. "But I also read the lyrics of every song by the bands with top ten hits. They don't talk about it nearly as much. They sing about other stuff. And they don't use an F major chord in every one of their songs."

"We don't-"

"We kinda do, Eddie," the bassist pipes up. "I'm a little sick of playing F."

Eddie takes a breath. Steve takes the opportunity to take a pill.

He found a way to make it less obvious for people who have something to say about it. Steve will take one from his pocket, yawn, cover his mouth, and swallow it dry. Easy peasy. They don't notice, he doesn't have to deal with people who don't get it making comments.

Except when he does, this time, Eddie narrows his eyes. Like he knows what he's doing.

Steve doesn't like that look.

"Have you read my stuff?" He won't ask if Eddie has listened to any of it. He knows the answer is no, if he keeps bringing up genre like that really means anything.

Eddie doesn't respond. He keeps those narrowed eyes trained on Steve and stays silent.

"Didn't think so," he says, and he slides over the thick stack of papers Robin stapled together for him last night. "Here's everything. Read it. Tell me if you like it. I'm only helping you if you give a shit. This goes two ways, and I don't want to waste my time if you think I'm wasting yours."

Eddie doesn't take the stack, but the drummer, sitting next to him, tugs them closer. "Thanks."

"Let me know tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" Jeff says, eyebrows raised.

Steve forgets that most people don't actually take advantage of their twenty four hours.

"End of the week," he says instead, and he relaxes when Jeff does.

The drummer starts flipping through the pages while the bassist looks over his shoulder.

"Need anything else from me?" Steve asks Chrissy.

"I don't think so," she says. "I'll call you back to set up a time for Saturday."

He's amazed by the fact that someone as sweet as her works with someone as pretentious as Eddie.

"Sounds good," he says, and he walks out, trying to ignore the feeling of Eddie's eyes on him as he goes through the door.

It only halfway works.

The pill should kick in soon, within a half hour, maybe shorter because of the coffee. Maybe he'll write something. Maybe he'll work on the piano melody he's been tinkering with for the past week. Maybe he'll read the latest book Robin picked up from the library, something interesting enough to be worth the frustration of the moving letters, something that will still fill the time.

He'll make it to seventy two hours. Then he'll crash because his body is a worthless piece of shit, and he hopes this is the half of the time when he doesn't have any goddamn nightmares.

Maybe he should pop another pill, just in case.

[billsbabydoll]

“𝓃ℴ ℴ𝓃ℯ𝓈 ℯ𝓋ℯ𝓇 𝒽𝒶𝒹 𝓂ℯ, 𝓃ℴ𝓉 𝓁𝒾𝓀ℯ 𝓎ℴ𝓊.”

contains:PURE FLUFF<3

summary:being apart of tokio hotel was a complete dream come true! me and bill had quickly grown closer as the years passed but would we ever tell each-other about our secret crush on one another? one day while working our new album “humanoid” someone has a long confession to make.

WARNINGS:cringe fluff again, friends to lovers, crush confession, first kiss.

notes:requested by anonymous hope you enjoy this story!also my dms are open to more suggestions:)))

ive been apart of the band since they were devilish and i played second guitar, working with the four boys throughout the years has been a wonderful experience.they all were like family to me but bill was different, every other member i saw as a brother but him something about him was different.he was confident, silly understanding, caring, and obviously sooo handsome.

bill and me had become best friends over the years, doing each-others makeup, shopping together, writing lyrics together, sometimes we even cuddled together in the tour bus.

the other boys would poke fun at us and say “can yall just kiss already?” or tom would usually say “bill fuck her before i do.” we both would just nervously laugh it off but something about the way he looked at me longingly afterwards told me maybe he did want to do just that, but too afraid to just say something.

today we had to do some recording and stuff in the studio, i was the first to arrive making my way inside beginning to set up and plug in my guitar.

then the door suddenly opened and there came in my favorite boy ever, little to no makeup on, his dreads resting on his shoulders, wearing some black sweats, his adidas sweater and a pair of sneakers.he yawned as he closed the door and made his way over to me, tapping my shoulder from behind.

“hallooo liebling! (hi darling).” he said his thick german accent coming through as he clapped his hands excitedly together.

i turned around meeting his gorgeous hazel eyes and cheesy smile, i quickly return the smile “hii billy!” i reply matching the same excitement as i pull him into a gentle embrace, before letting go.

he lets go as well before taking a seat on the nearby stool tapping the one next to him, signaling for me to sit as well.i nod and take a seat turning myself to the side now facing him, he does the same thing, our eyes meeting again.

we began talking about whatever random things we always talked about giggling and laughing our heads off like we always did, not realizing 30 minutes passed and the other boys still hadn’t shown up.

when we do realize, we confusedly check the time seeing it’s been an hour passed the original time we were supposed to be recording and working on some new lyrics.we debated on leaving or waiting it out for a little while longer, we figured it could just be traffic.

we decided to make use of us being at the studio and began to work on this song we came up with “down on you”.

“how about we change it to -an angels kiss is waiting- ?” i suggest humming it softly to him.

“okay okay i like it!” his eyes lighting up at my suggestion, writing it down quickly on his notebook.

we continue working on the song for a bit (more like 5 minutes) before soon giving up, finding it too hard to work and also focus as bill keep cracking jokes and making me laugh.bill got up putting the notebook, coming back to sit down again.

he suddenly began to speak up again his demeanor now anxious and tense, “i have something ive been keeping from you and I don’t know an easier way to say this.”

“bill what’s wrong, it’s okay i won’t judge you if its something bad?”i responded trying to sound as reassuring and polite as possible, trying to make him feel at ease.

“ich mag dlich wirklich du bist alles was ich wollte und suchte.ich weib dass es kompliziert sein wind wenn du schriebst dass ich auf tour bin, wir werden dafür sorgen, dass es klappt, das verspreche ich. (i really like you, your everything ive wanted and been looking for.i know it will be complicated when you write i tour, we’ll make it work i promise).”he said looking down to not see my expression.

truly i was shocked but not at his confession but that I was right, i knew he felt it too!

“ich mag dich auch wirklich, du hast recht, wir werden dafür sorgen, dass es klappt liebe. (i really like you too your right, we’ll make it work love).” i reply while reaching my hand down grabbing his chin making him look up at me, letting go once his eyes meet mine.

his expression transforms into a delighted and happy one a smile now tugging at the corners of his lips, his eyes glistening with joy.he then leans in wrapping his arms around me as he holds me in a tight and warm embrace, kissing the top of my head.

he sways me in his arms for a moment longer before letting go, his hand now intertwined in mine.looking at me with so much excitement and adoration, (this guy was whipped).

i move in closer closing my eyes as i place my lips upon the lips ive been longing for forever, catching his lips into a gentle and perfect kiss.fireworks seemed to pop around us, our first kiss of many.

he moved his hand onto the side of my waist the other on the back of my head keeping me in place. his tongue finding its way inside, our tongues soon moving in perfect harmony.he’s an even better kisser than i ever imagined, tasting like mint and sweet honey.

the moment was quickly put to an end as we heard the sound of hands clapping and laughing, we both confusedly pull away and look over, seeing tom, gustav and, georg giggling like little school girls.

“when did yall come in?!” me and bill unanimously yelled.

“oh not long ago yall were just too busy swapping spit to hear us come in, so we decided to enjoy the show.” tom chuckled crossing his arms over his chest, the other boys still laughing.

“TOM!”we both yell.

THE END

[venusvity]

˚˖𓍢ִ໋🍒✧˚.⋆ UR MY BABY! HELLO, I'M BAEBI!

cw: sexualization + controlling company

  JUNG YOONAH took on the stage name BAEBI in 2018 upon her debut with VENUS and the world was never the same.

Baebi would take the world by storm with her solo debut the same year Venus would debut, sparking much discussion among fans over favoritism, a debate that still rages today. But who cares about favoritism when the music is good? Bubble Pop! Would take the Kpop world by storm, becoming the song of the summer.

It peaked at number two on South Korea's Gaon Album Chart and charted atop the US Billboard World Albums. As of 2023, it has sold 560,000 copies in South Korea. 

Bubble Pop! 's commercial success was the main contributor to Angelico Entertainment's leading music sales. The song peaked at number one in South Korea, where it has sold over 2.5 million digital units. To accompany her solo release, Baebi held a series of small concerts called Baebi's Summer Splash. She was awarded Best Female Artist at the 2018 Mnet Asian Music Awards and at the 2019 Golden Disk Awards.

Chart data is boring. Let's talk about something else.

Returning just a few months later with the mini album "Tell Me More" and a title track of the same name, fans grew slightly more concerned over Yoonah's concept as a soloist. According to her most dedicated fans, her sound and look were very mature, very sensual, and bordering on sexual, which didn't really match Yoonah's character.

No one would be shocked at the music and content Baebi would be releasing when looking at her creative team:

The Son Brothers, Jinhwa and Roan, would be the proud creative directors behind all of Baebi's solo work. Bubble Pop! would be Son Roan's, later turned CEO of Angelico after his brother departed from the label to become CEO of Mydol, Angelico's now parent company, first project in the Kpop realm.

"I like working with Baebi because she's something different than what you're used to seeing from the other idols out there. You can do things with Baebi you can't normally do with other idols and I find that very exciting." – Son Roan when asked about the Baebi brand in 2020.

2020 Baebi hit a career-high with her mini album "Glassdoor" and the lead single, Gashina. This song was everywhere, but even more to an extent, no Angelico artist had ever seen. Baebi was an international sensation. She'd go on a mini world tour as a soloist, the first and only Venus member to do so, promoting internationally, being the first soloist under Angelico to do so internationally.

A point of contention in Baebi's career is the botched release of her first full album, "Hello Baebi!" with the poorly promoted single, Hello. When Baebi was coming back, you knew about it, your friends knew about it, your mama knew about it, hell, even your grandma knew about it. For Hello Baebi? Not a peep. Even Baebi fans were confused when Ktown4u posted a pre-order poster for the album before Angelico even posted teasers. Which, mind you, she only got four photo teasers and a single video trailer for a full album.

When the comeback happened, promotions only lasted for two weeks, something unheard of for Baebi and the outfits? Fresh off the Forever21 rack. The stages? Bare. Nothing. The MV? Budget cut in half. Something wasn't right...Then when you looked at the album credits, neither of the Son brothers were anywhere to be seen. The entire album was made by Baebi herself, something she shared often on her Instagram or during the few interviews she did during this era.

Either way, Hello Baebi, her one cute era completely controlled by her, was deemed a flop and the Son brothers used that to their advantage, taking full creative control over Baebi's image again.

Which is where Touch came in.

Touch was noted for its overtly sexual music video, on-the-nose sexual lyrics, and latex outfits Baebi would promote in. The single, which was, of course, promoted ions better than Hello Baebi!, was phenomenally on the charts and in sales, "proving" that the mature concept is what people wanted from Baebi. At least, that's Jinhwa's belief.

Baebi's release after Touch would be a mini album titled "Stupid B—" with the promoted track TWIT. Fans that worried for Baebi would be soothed by this less sexual yet mature concept and the actual look of enjoyment on Yoonah's face when performing the song, something that seemed to be lacking when she was performing Touch.

After a year break from solo activities, Baebi would come back swinging in 2024 with her second full album, "Choke On It," and the title track LIPLOCKER, which was a hit, of course. Though the concept was leaning more toward sexual than mature, Baebi seemed more comfortable performing and actually had fun during this promotional period. She'd go on to say that LIPLOCKER was her favorite comeback since Hello Baebi!, which fans are hesitant to believe, but whatever makes her happy!

[billie-reportingbadnews2you]

A sneaky afterparty/ a Billie Eilish fanfic

a song too math cuz it was on

warning: fingering (kinda), swearing 18+!!!!!

Ever since Billie Eilish's first album came out you have been a huge fan, ALWAYS listening to her music and you had, posters and clothes all Billie Eilish related, but when she was having a concert in your city you just had to go, so when you bought them you were overly excited.

its the day of the concert and you obiously so fucking excited, you get there early and take you seat, which was really close to the stage, a couple hours later the gates closed and the first song started play, you'll never forget the moment you saw billie eiliesh stop onto that stage.

*45 mins later*

as your singing along to a song, she and you make eye contact you started blushing, but obviously she couldn't see that, but just as you were going to grab out your phone she sort of bend down, and dry humped the stage looking directly at you, this made you a big wet and really turned on, at the most sexual parts of songs she'd make eye contact with you, once the song finished she went over to one of the guards and pointed at you, were you in trouble? the guard walked over you go and grabbed you by the arm and with a stern voice he spoke "miss Eilish would like to invite you backstage, would you like too?" I was too stunned, the motherfucking Billie Eilish noticed me? and chose me, out of the thousands of people , I was overthinking maybe it's just a lucky chance or some prize think, as I left the stadium and entered backstage the music getting quieter the further I went he place me on the couch and spoke again "Mrs. Eilish has one song left, after that she will come talk to you, help yourself to the refreshments" and he just walked off, so many questions going through you head, why the fuck did Billie Eilish choose you? and what for?.

just as you were about to ask the guard more questions, the music stopped, and everyone started clapping I looked at the tv, to what looked like her concert just recorded, and a man standing on stage well Billie walked of as he shouted "LADIES AND GENTELMAN, BILLIE EILISH" as she left the stage you could her cameras clicking, the paparazzi were already waiting for her, the guard was able to shove them away, as she approached you and sat next to you, she shoved a cookie in her mouth "18,948" I had no idea what she was saying "18,948 is how much people came" THE Billie Eilish was talking to me?, she turned to me at put out her hand "Billie Eilish" you shook her hand, it was soft, fragile it was warm, like comforting, "Y/n L/n", Billie spoke with a slight seduction in her voice "hot name for a hot girl huh?" you chuckled she thought you were hot??? as she sat next to you for the next couple of minutes, you froze, her hand was going down your inner thigh making you whimper "oh you like that baby mommy going to make you feel good, now open up" without saying anything you spread your clothed legs, Billie ran her hand up and down your leg slowly applying pressure to your clothed pussy and clit, "f-fuck Billie" she applied more pressure "shhhhh, be quiet baby don't want anyone catching us not would you" she was right you didn't want anyone to, I mean being fingered but Billie Eilish is a dream come true, within a couple minutes her hand had gotten into your pants thrusting 2 fingers inside your aching cunt "awh you love mommy's fingers huh? I wand you to come all over them" she started thrusting hard and without a doubt you clench the couch and came on her finger, she slowly took her hand out of your pants while licking them clean while staring at you, she handed you a little cardboard note, with her number on it as she got up she mouther "call me"

that was the best concert ever.

Hey y'all! this was my first fanfiction, I hope you liked it! a very good TikTok edit inspired me, ily y'all!!!!

[brat-pack-it-up-boys]

Ponyboy that was then this is now headcanons

• I’m a big believer in ponyboy continuing to dye his hair blonde after windrixville for sentimentality (also I fuck with the character design aspect)

• so his hairs died blond but it’s also grown out, its the late 1960s and greased hair is becoming even less of a thing than it was before, so his hair is choppily cut above his shoulders and it has the worst grown at roots

• he is the KING of hand me downs, more so than in the outsiders because he fits into more of the clothes that darry and soda actually saved, soda’s flannels, pants, shirts, Darry’s old jackets, he owns his shoes and that it

• okay this one goes more into the au where sodapop is drafted and killed in the Vietnam war because it technically lines up with the twttin timeline. But ponyboy would wear soda’s dog tags literally every day

• more reckless than he was in the outsiders, partially because he’s grown up and partially because of his friends and the people he surrounds himself with

• his friendgroup basically consist of the remainder of the gang, curly and Angela, mark, scout, and two bits sister Brenda I guess

• on the topic of Brenda, ponyboy basically reacreats his and Johnnys relationship with dally with her, they’re so siblings you don’t understand, the brother and sister ever

• very unpopular in school, not in a way of getting bullied but in the way of a lot of kids in his grade being scared of him

“that Curtis kid who helped kill someone”

• the beef Bryon has him is entirely one sided to the point that Ponyboy doesn’t even realize it exists

• despite not having the best reputation he’s finally grown into his looks and if it weren’t for the events of the first book he would be pulling

• Him and Cathy start dating a little bit after twttin, Cathy had been at boarding school during the entirety of the first book so she didn’t have the same stigma against him that the other kids at school

• he actually gets pretty into the Beatles after he starts dating Cathy because they’re her favorite band, he likes the please please me album

• he also adopts M&M into his little gang with Brenda (pushing my M&M and Brenda as best friends agenda)

• in the end all that really means is that he helps M&M with kids picking on him (his reputation from the whole bob incident makes him pretty intimidating), M&M and Brenda also get to tag along on some of Pony and Cathy’s dates to the movies

• honestly I could talk about him and Cathy for hours but as the youngest him dating her and realizing how much she has to do as the oldest makes him gain more of understanding for darry

• also him and Cathy’s song is definitely Do you want to know a secret

@izaacs-notdeadyet because you mentioned you wanted to hear them, sorry it took me thousand years to actually get around to posting this

[lovebvni]

holaaa!! (dr rant + just an appreciation post)

(TW SLIGHT HINT TO GROOMING)

soo i’m shifting soon and i decided that im going to make my first album when i get there (LIKE START JT, DUDE. START IT. IM SO EXCITED) there’s going to b an ep i’m going to finalize when i get there and it will be released on the 26th of the month i get there (as it is kinda a diss on a MAN who was 26 when we dated… i was a minor still.)

i’m also gonna make a family tree because i’m really bored (and i also kinda js wanna see all my siblings yk? im gonna draw them all soon bc like AUGH AJAJDKDJ I MISS THEM!!!)

omgz i’m so excited dude!!

(appreciation below!!)

also i saw billie eilish in my dream last night. one of the funniest and sweetest people i know 😭 SHARK WAS ALSO IN THAT DREAM HES SO SWEET ‼️‼️ god i wish i could hug them today, just right now. yall don’t understand how much billie and finneas have been through together, and im so proud of how far they made it. i love you both, and although you won’t see this post in this reality, i know you will when we r together :DDD u guys make me so happy, so inspired, and just a better person overall. also huge thank you to billie in helping me with directing my music videos and being featured in one of my favorite songs — ripple effect. thank you finneas for just 😭 for keeping her alive, giving her a passion, and being so protective and supportive of her.

i’m so excited to b friends w both of them n js talk to them daily — it’s so fun.

i’m also super duper excited to meet one of my closest friends — nile — in person finally!!!! it’s been like 3 years of shifting together, and i know she’s excited too. i know she’s reading this, btw so i love u sm nile and thank u for being such a great and perfect friend throughout this whole journey. i truly don’t think i would still be kicking without you. i owe you the world, and i know you’re going to be blessed with many MANY things in the coming months, and the years following will be some of your best, but that’s only a taste of what is truly to come.

i’m so proud of you, and i’m also so round of everyone that has been clinging onto shifting even though it hurts. i’m always here for you. i love you all so so much. i want the best for you, and i know you’re going to get it. i’m always here to help in ANY way i can. ask me anything, i promise you i will answer with the wisdom God and the universe has given me!!

i cannot express my gratitude to my father, loki, enough. i don’t know how to even put it into words. he’s been there at my hardest, he’s been there at my best. i don’t think i would actually even be this far without him either. he’s one of the silliest and sweetest people ive ever met. i can’t believe he’s my FATHER you guys!! ITS SO COOL AUGHH

i also have so many people here i need to thank, there’s more that i can think of right now but just know i love and appreciate every one of you guys.

staring with @smellofemale!! you were such a sign when i met you. i don’t think i’ve met a christian shifter — you’re the only one i still talk to if i have! im just so so sooo blessed to have met you. i don’t know what to say, dude! i love you so much. you’re so sweet, so kind, and so inspiring. i love you!

@eneablack although you’re one of my newest friends, you’re another really really inspirational one. you’re so open about your struggles with shifting, even though you’ve had success time and time again. it shows me and many others how shifting sometimes is a hard thing to get used too, even with successes under your belt!

@daisys-reality! if you don’t know them, FOLLOW IMMEDIATELY PLEASE OMGGJAJSN she gives some of the best and most accurate readings i could ever ask for. also her drs (specifically her mermaid one) have inspired me so much!!

@kanachaka UR AO COOL BRO I JS LOVE SEEING UR POSTS AJSJDKDJD

@kazylynn i love u sm!! u rlly show me i can be an inspiration to others, and that’s something i’ve hoped for all my life. i want to be a good, helpful person — and i love you for showing me i can be.

@babybearthepsychic a few months ago you gave me a free reading that was just so accurate and so real. i don’t know if i would still be on this spiritual journey without it, because i was at one of my hardest points then. i cannot believe how just truly accurate and kind you are. i love you so much, you’re doing amazing. i wish i could give you the biggest hug, and i could donate like a million dollars to u rn but i literally don’t have a job 😭

@zipperrants i don’t think i rlly need to explain this… dude i thought u we’re so cool even when u we’re js interacting with @maddies-chronicles and i rlly wanted to interact w u so bad but i was so so scared bro!! and thank u hale for giving me the opportunity to meet them!!

@accidentalshifter YOU DONT UNDERSTAND HOW MANY PEOPLE U REPRESENT IN THIS RESLITY — YOURE ONE OF THE FIRSR ADULT SHIFTERS I SAW ON HERR AND IM SO SO SO SO SOOO FUCKING HQPPY YOURE SO OPEN ABOUT IT! you’re just so free and it’s beautiful. i love you so much

and there are so many more but i just.. im gonna cry i love you all tooo much.. please know u all mean so much to me and i can’t wait to tell u so many stories when i get back, and help u guys shift. i am working so hard to post more, and i pray this post can help me become more active.

so so so much love, to everyone in this community, you’re so wonderful. may the gods bless you.

so much love, peace and joy

the abyss

[mariailoveyou-guerin]

Bridgerton cast the roles they auditioned for Vs the role they actually got in the end! Y’all see NICOLA oh!

Nicola Coughlan Pen got Pen

Claudia Jessie Pen got Eloise

Jonathan Bailey Simon got Anthony

Luke Newton Simon got Colin

Phoebe Dyvenor 2 roles Pen and ? got Daphne

Calam Lynch Colin got Theo

Hannah Dodd Daphne got Francesca

Luke Thompson Duke got Benedict

and people cry about why she’s the favourite and why she’s the main character face of the whole show like I’m need y’all to be fr no one is on her level no ever reaching her range and versatility all of them combined couldn’t even reach miss face of the 😂 sit down now

I just know on my mothers life Shonda was sob crying thanking her gods on her car on her way home when she got Nicola in that room and said that’s my main character face of my franchise and she was so right! It’s fcgo Shonda always I don’t like her but she really ATE but not really since its really Nicola that devoured that audition effortlessly too she didn’t even try hard because she knew it’s shondaland and there was like 500 other people auditioning for pen so she just said I’m do my best and not force it and Shonda really said you shall be my whole everything an she was right still fcvk Shonda always tho genuinely hate that eh woman

Ofc Nicola fav song on Beyoncé new album is bow down 😂 it’s literally what everyone should be doing every time they see her or go near her! bow down bitc*hes when you are in the presence of your betters!

not Nicola literally talking about having a day or two to prep for pen (in her new video that dropped now 😂 they saw me talking about and said let’s give you the proof for the antis before they jump you best girl) and being the face of one of Netflix biggest show oh she’s so silly love of my life what a legend what a queen! TV