#but no instead I have to think about that. sigh life is so hard 😔

[running-in-the-dark]

did nothing all night, now I can't fall asleep. great!

[megistusdiary]

Hi again LMAO

Can i request a gentle dom sampo eating out reader to help her destress from her studies??👉👈

i hope he comes home to you soon😔😔

With love, Cait Someone you dont know

omg hey ~ 🤭 sorry i disappeared for a few days there, everyone. chemistry is hard ‼️

i also hope sampo comes home. i saw his attack recently with the chocolate box or whatever and also his wink....panties? dropped.

wouldn't it be nice to have someone come relieve all the stress from studying... also this turned out long bc plot

gentle-dom!sampo x fem!(anatomy/pronouns) reader

warnings: 18+ content, minors dni!

oral (reader receiving), praise, sampo asking natasha for sex advice, gripping the hips (real), sampo is stronger than reader (enough to hold you still 😏), fluff and some after-care at the end!

"guess who's here?~" sampo called out, pushing the door closed with his hip and kicking his shoes off to the side.

when you didn't respond immediately, sampo tossed his hair to the side, taking in a deep breath. "i said, 'guess who's here?' it's a real surprise!" sampo grinned, sneaking around the corner towards the couch.

he jumped out, eyebrows furrowing when he realized you weren't sitting (even sleeping!) there. aeons...

sampo called out again for you before he heard frustrated paper crumpling from your room. "aha!"

sampo came barreling in, pushing your door open and scaring the shit out of you when you saw his shadow before you saw him.

the way you nearly jumped out of your skin had him doubling over. "that's right! it's me, the amazing, sampo koski! and i brought you," he paused to reveal a singular ruby-red rose, "a gift!"

it took him a moment to realize what was going on before he faltered, seeing crumpled up papers at your feet and books stacked a mile high on your desk.

"you're still studying? it's after dinner time. have you eaten yet?" sampo suddenly kneeled down next to you, laying the rose on your desk in favor of taking your hands instead.

"sampo, it's fine, i'm fine! really-"

"not acceptable!" he shook his head, wagging a finger in your face and pulling you up.

"i'm really not hungry, i just need to finish this."

you could see sampo pouting as you slumped back into the chair.

"won't you at least take a break and spend some time with me?" sampo whined when he sat back down by your feet, leaning his chin on your thigh.

"you're not a puppy."

"but aren't i as cute as one?" he gave you the biggest eyes he could manage, watching your lips quirk up as you shook your head at him.

"okay, okay." you turned to gather all your papers in a stack, standing up and kicking your failed notes into a pile. before you could pick them up, sampo was already collecting them in his arms.

"allow me!" he smiled up at you, dumping everything into the bin beside your bed.

"helpful and sweet, how did i get so lucky?" you mused, sitting on your bed, patting the spot next to you.

sampo, taking liberties, of course, flopped onto your bed on his stomach, rolling to rest his head on your lap. you carded your fingers through his hair, feeling him snuggle further into your thigh.

"what's got you so worked up anyways?" he questioned as you sighed deeply.

"school stuff. i've been studying some of these concepts for hours, but it doesn't even matter. i still don't get it."

"why don't you let me take your mind off of it for a little?" sampo suggested, looking up at you with a cheeky smirk as you scoffed at him.

"don't even-"

"i'm being one-hundred percent serious!" he rushed to sit up, almost knocking you in the jaw. "come on! let me make you feel good~"

"okay-" within seconds, sampo had you resting against the pillows on your bed, already peeling off your shorts. "woah, someone's eager."

"i've been thinking about this all day. you know, i was asking natasha about this stuff and i really think i've got the hang of it now."

your eyes widened, processing exactly what he meant. "sampo, have you been telling natasha about our sex life?"

sampo froze, fingers hovering over the waistband of your panties. "...was i not supposed to? you don't have anything to worry about! miss natasha is a doctor, after all."

you groaned, covering your face with embarrassment.

"i promise it'll feel good." sampo tugged your underwear down. you watched him fling the piece of cloth somewhere across the room, spreading your thighs and holding them down against you.

you felt shy, face heating up as he exposed you completely. he leaned down, hair tickling your thighs as he kissed your clit tenderly. your hands moved down, gripping his hair when he slid his tongue across your pussy.

little noises slipped out from your lips as he circled your clit, sucking on it gently every so often. mumbles of his name and whines came out as you shifted around, though to no avail beneath sampo's iron grip.

"good, so good-" sampo groaned into you, feeling you shiver from the vibrations.

you felt his tongue prod at your hole, circling around and collecting the slick, pressing in and feeling you clench around his tongue. your thighs trembled beneath his hands, feeling him holding you down firmly.

he moved back up to play with your clit, using the tip of his tongue to trace out the letters of his name and then yours as your soft moans turned into more breathy whimpers and cries.

he pressed you down further, exposing your pussy more for him as he breathed heavily against you, fingers twitching against your skin. "you're pretty like this. i like it when you're relaxed and enjoying yourself. you deserve a break." he cooed into you, trailing wet and messy kisses across your thighs.

"you think so?" you laughed, wiping the tears from the corners of your eyes.

"mhm," he nodded against you. "working too hard."

"oh- i'm sorry!" your hands pulled at his hair, hips jumping up against his grip when he played with you just right, pulling you closer against his lips.

your hearing began to turn fuzzy as you stared up at the ceiling, eyes fluttering shut as he mumbled something against you again, feeling vibrations course through your body as your orgasm built. "please..." you muttered, moving one hand up to grip the sheets as he sped up his actions.

sampo kept going, doing exactly what miss natasha told him to. he trusted her fully, glad that he went to her for guidance as you trembled underneath him now. he liked seeing you like this, away from your work and enjoying yourself for once. you were too cute, he thought to himself.

as soon as your orgasm hit, you twisted your fingers into your hair, riding it out as he collected the dripping slick from your hole.

you relaxed onto the bed, twisting your body when he continued to lap at your pussy. "sampo- hey, no more, ah-" you lightly batted at the crown of his head, feeling him pull away reluctantly.

"so...was it good?"

you laughed, feeling exhausted as your eyes closed against your will. "yeah...really good.."

sampo grinned, leaving briefly to grab a damp cloth, cleaning you up before depositing you into your bed. "a little nap is good once in a while." he decided aloud.

he tapped your shoulder quickly, watching you tiredly open your eyes. "i'm going to go get you something to eat. you stay here and sleep a little, okay?"

"don't have to tell me twice." you mumbled, rolling over and burying yourself into your blankets, drifting off into a peaceful, dream-filled sleep.

[kattythingz]

Where is he? / Where is the man with whom you’ll spend your life?

Penelopeeeeee... Penelopee.... And ED AS PENELOPE, SIKE. I did say my original epic au stemmed from this root concept >:D! (Ft. Nina as Telemachus, obviously.) This au has been a terrible brainworm since before the Ocean Saga, but the Wisdom Saga broke into my house personally and kicked the shit out of me with that Man of the House reprise. I think I blacked out between then and drawing this.

Rip to all the edling animatics I'd make to Epic if only I had the skills, starting from Man of the House. Sigh 😔

Bonus Ed & Nina scene under the cut~

The Emperor of Xing has been gone nearly a decade now.

At eleven years old, the heiress to the throne, Nina, begins to grow anxious of the suitors inviting themselves into the palace, all to win her father’s heart. All for naught, however, as Ed only has eyes for the distant sea; frozen at the window, he watches every new ship that docks at the bay.

Always hoping it’s Ling’s ship. Always deflating when it’s not.

One such day, Nina’s watching the sea with Ed, this time standing properly at the dock with the breeze in their hair. When the last of the ships have docked, none to Ed’s hope, Nina asks with a small voice whether Ed will marry any of the suitors.

Ed turns surprised eyes to her. “Why would you ask that?” he asks genuinely.

“Because…” Nina starts, wringing her hands anxiously. “You married Papa to be happy together, right? So… so, if you want to be happy again…”

She stops when Ed laughs. “Nina, marrying one of those suitors definitely won’t make me happy. I was never even interested in marriage when I met Ling, you know? I wouldn’t marry one of those guys in comparison if they begged me on their knees and punched themselves.”

Nina giggles at the image, and Ed ruffles her hair with a grin.

“I know it’s hard,” he continues, “but don’t worry yourself about those guys. They’re my problem to deal with.”

“But... the other day... I heard one of them say…” She bites her lip. “I heard them joke about killing you. To—to take your crown…”

Ed knows what she means. They joked about cutting off his head in his sleep to slide Ling’s crown from his neck. He heard them too. 

He schools his revolted reaction even now still, letting out a sigh before kneeling at Nina’s level. She doesn’t fight it when he tugs her into a comforting hug.

“Then they’ll be sorely disappointed when they fail. I’ll stay regent until the day your father gets home... or the day I die waiting for him.” Ed smiles sadly to himself with the last words, and Nina starts at them too.

He doesn’t give her a chance to protest before pulling back to look her in the eye and smile properly.

“And, if that ever happens,” he tells her, “then they still won’t get their kicks, because this kingdom will just have a beautiful queen instead.”

Nina’s eyes go big. Ed sobers in comparison, looking solemn as he holds her eye. “I won’t lie to you; those suitors will try to poison you with a lot of thoughts. They’ll tell you Xing has never had a queen before, or that you aren’t Ling and I’s blood. But all of it’s bullshit. Even if Xing’s never had a queen before, you are the rightful blood to the throne. Ling and I made sure of that when we first adopted you, when we fed you our combined blood in proper ceremony.”

Nina pulls a face, and Ed lets out a laugh. “Yeah, it’s pretty gross. But the process does hold meaning, especially here. It means you are Ling and I’s blood. And anyone who says otherwise clearly has some cultural history to catch up with.”

“But... I don’t want to be queen,” Nina says lowly, looking down at her hands. “I... I know I will be. But you’re the king now. And then it’ll be Papa when he gets back. I don’t…” 

I don't want either of you to die yet.

She doesn’t say it, but Ed hears it all the same, and his heart aches for her. 

He nudges her chin to meet his eye again, expression softer. “I know. Trust me, doll, I know. This is all still a far ways into the future. But I want you to think about it, so you’re not unprepared. Alright?”

“Alright.”

Ed’s eyes lift when Nina nods meekly. He stands up again, holding out his hand for her to grab, and she does so immediately with a squeeze. “That’s my girl. That’s enough depressing talks today. Since it’s still early, why don’t we hit the kitchens to... surprise the suitors a little?”

Nina catches onto his mischievous intent easily—truly his daughter—and giggles. “What kind of surprise today?”

“Hmmm... you had a pretty good idea with their wine last time, didn’t you?”

Nina’s excited little gasp is well worth the trouble from the suitors that morning.

[loverboy-havocboy]

Could I request number 17 with Cody/Kix? 🙏

17. an upside-down “spider-man” kiss - cody/kix

i'm gonna be honest (and apologetic), this was hard, and i think i gave up a little 😔

Cody never thought he'd meet a CT whose schedule could give his a run for its money - and that's not him being patronizing, it's him being responsible for the entire 7th Sky Corps.

Kix proved him wrong.

Cody supposes that if it were anyone, the man responsible for tending to the injuries of Rex’s island of misfit troopers makes the most sense.

If life had been kinder, they could have been good friends. They could've been content with a comm call here and there, where time allowed. They could've bumped shoulders when they ran into each other at 79’s. They could've separated from their joint missions without the aching, gnawing fear that this would be the last time.

Life wasn't so kind, though, and instead it chose to crash their hearts together like two ships colliding in hyperspace. They needed each other now, and they were rarely so lucky as to get a moment alone. Tonight's no different.

Every time a comm goes off, it's anybody's guess as to which of them are being called away, and whether they hope it's for something arbitrary like an inventory meeting or a life threatening emergency. Cody thinks this one had damn well better be an emergency.

They'd just fallen asleep.

Their reunion had been quick - too quick - because they'd just known they'd be interrupted. Cody almost wishes they'd been interrupted during the act, because now he's pliant and warm with the full length of Kix’s solid body pressed against his back, and all he wants is to stay that way.

“Yours or mine?” Kix mumbles against the back of his neck.

Given that he's closer, Cody reaches for their comms and groans a little, which is enough of an answer.

“Sorry,” the medic says, loosening his grip on him. “I’d make it mine if I could.”

“No you wouldn't,” Cody grouses, careful to keep the blanket over Kix as he extricates himself, cringing at the mess between his legs.

“No, I wouldn't,” Kix agrees, trailing his fingertips over Cody's bare back. At least he has the decency to sound apologetic about it.

Cody sighs heavily as he drops down from the top bunk, his feet hitting the cold durasteel floor. Kix rolls the short distance to the edge of the mattress and peers down to watch him dress. When Cody looks over, he snorts softly at the sight of his boyfriend's head hanging upside-down off the bunk.

Unable to resist, he steps in and takes Kix's face in his hands. Tempted further by the curl of his lips, Cody dips his head to steal a kiss from them. Kix sighs lightly against him.

“I’ll miss you,” Kix tells him.

“You’ll be asleep again before the door closes,” Cody disagrees.

Kix just shrugs a little, so Cody just kisses him again.

He'll sleep in Kix's arms before they part if it's the last force-forsaken thing he does.

[meowriddler]

Sunrise

A/n: i need him 😔

Warning: just fluff

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅

Edward never seems to sleep well, and that was the cause before you came into his life and changed everything for the better. Of course, back then he would only take naps, afraid of the nightmares that may come with those rare times he actually slept; they always hunted him, but having you around, you were the light in his darkness just the touch of your hand alone eased that fear and anxiety he usually gets.

Sleeping with you was his favorite part of his day besides hanging out with you all day obviously, feeling the warmth of your body pressed against his while watching your peaceful face drift into dreamland he loved to admire your beauty up close his hand slowly reaches out to touch you but hesitates not wanting to disturb you but finding it hard to resist his hand gently caressing your cheek while smiling at you with adoring eyes god you have to be the most beautiful person he ever led his eye upon finally his eyes feel heavy needing nothing more to sleep he gives in feeling more at peace then ever.

Edward reaches out in his sleep looking for that source of comfort but finds a cold place instead, now awake more than ever, Edward gets up looking confused while squinting his eyes. He goes to grab his glasses and puts them on, finally being able to see. He looks around and finds the room empty.

Making his way out of the bedroom, he sees a strong source of light at the end of the hallway, squinting his eyes and trying to adjust to the light, and there you were standing in front of the window watching the sun rise. He could have sworn his heart just skipped a beat at the sight of the many colors of the sun reflecting on your stunning figure, making you out to be an angel.

His angel sent here to answer all of his prayers, and he slowly makes his way over, not wanting to disturb this moment.

Hearing soft footsteps behind you standing there is your Eddie with his messy mousey hair and his cute Batman pjs that you got him. smiling softly at his sleepy state

"Sorry luv, did I wake you up?" Frowning slightly and feeling a bit bad, you must’ve woken him up.

"Don’t worry about it Angel," giving you a tired smile "what are you doing up anyways?" He says rubbing the sleep off of his eyes.

"Oh, I went to get a glass of water, and well, I couldn’t help myself to the view." Now facing the window while sighing slightly, you always did love watching the sunrise; something about it never failed to captivate you.

Eddie on the other hand was busy captivated by your effortless beauty, so unique yet so compelling. Edward wishes he were an artist just so he could capture this moment and paint it on a canvas—not even that would be enough.

Now feeling a pair of long arms around your waist and the warmth that comes with Eddie Just sinking into his body, hoping to be one with him, you could stay like this for eternity and never get tired of it.

Slowly rocking u both, you feel Eddie plant a few butterfly kisses on your temple, each one going further down until reaching your nape. You can’t help but giggle at the feeling.

Eddie stops and chuckles lightly against your nape, choosing to stay there finding serenity within you.

"Isn’t it pretty?" you asked.

Finally, Eddie looks up at the view and has to admit it was pretty, especially by Gotham standards, but nothing could ever compare to you. "Yeah, it’s pretty I guess but it doesn’t stand a chance next to you, Angel." Eddie says Smirking slightly

You feel yourself flush from that complaint, but not wanting to give in, "Stop it, I’m being serious, don’t you think so?" u lightly tap his hand

He lets out a cute giggle at your reaction: "Ok fine, it's kind of pretty. Are you happy now?"

"Yup, I’m satisfied now." feeling smug as u made ur point, you feel his arms tightening around you. Finally, it was your turn to look.

You find Eddie starring back at you with adoring eyes suddenly, and now you remember why you could never look away from his gaze—it was so full of affection you don’t think anyone has ever looked at you the way he did.

God, he falls deeper in love with you every time he looks into your eyes. They are so full of care and love that he can’t help but blush, feeling paralyzed under your gaze alone.

Sensing his hesitation, you plant a feather-like kiss against his lips. He blinks at you, trying to process what just happened, but immediately dives in for more.

As cheesy as it sounds, if your lips were a drug, he would be considered an addict because he could never get enough of them. He could feel his knees buckle slightly. You must know the effect you have on him, right?

Gently holding your face so softly as if you were made of glass, not wanting to shatter it, you deepen the kiss, wanting to stay cradled by his soft touch, but at last you softly pull away from the lack of oxygen, smiling at each other, finding it unnecessary for words at this point only exchanging looks of adoration feeling nothing but love for one another, forgetting all about the colored sky.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅

A/n: thank u for reading!! I hope u guys enjoyed this don’t forget to drink water👹🤍

[bambooshuohuop]

zhongli would be the type of grandpa that while he doesn't have a secret stash of money to give his grandchildren (he's still broke /hj 😔), he will instead make them sit around him— said grandpa perched on a creaky, old rocking chair as he gives valuable life lessons for the next generation to learn from. his experience makes him somewhat able to weave his words enough to make it interesting for the youngsters. so almost everyday in a lovely afternoon, zhongli's grandchildren can be seen huddled all around him; obviously charmed by his stories and calming voice.

~~

zhongli's own kids wondered where in the world had their children had gone to. when the finding took a while and they began to panic, all of them rushed to their father's home— knowing well that zhongli still has connections to help find their missing children.

as they reached zhongli's humble abode, all their panic turned into mush as they see the chaos unraveling before them.

❛grandpa, what's 19-6?❜

zhongli blinked, glancing at the child studying in Grade 3. he pondered for a moment, wondering if the school curriculum has changed or— ❛hm.. has your school teacher neglect teaching you, young man?❜

said kid blushed as he hears the quiet snickers of his cousins. though as he glanced back up to zhongli, he could genuinely see the worry in his eyes as they held their homework paper.

❛no!❜ he replies quickly as he thinks of a plausible excuse [he just wanted to listen to his grandpa and no one else :,( ]

❛I just don't get it, gramps.. school is so hard! help me, please?❜ he then whined.

zhongli couldn't help but cave in. his grandkids are just too cute. he was charmed with their puppy eyes that it makes him remember the good old days with his own children. which by the way, glued themselves by the front door.

❛what are you lot doing here?❜ zhongli questions, though he held no malice as he shuffles the children's homework paper around.

❛nothing, just thought we could hangout too- haha..❜ they replied, wiping off the sweat from the previous panic phase.

❛alright then, make yourselves at home.❜ zhongli ushered them down the cushions. though he couldn't move much apart from the small distance created for him as the children huddled all around the living room.

❛grandpa!❜

❛yes yes.. I'll help you, little one.❜

zhongli sighed, giving a side-eye to his own kids wondering why they couldn't teach their own children instead. though now that he thinks about it, he didn't mind the company the grandchildren brings on his home.

❛alright,❜ zhongli breathes in, eyes focused and brows furrowed on the math question in hand, ❛Johnny has 19 bottles of dish soap, and gives Gina 6—❜

overall, zhongli felt his heart beaming in pride when his grandchildren's grades are full of A's.

[expiredsoda]

It’s hella late for me so you’ll get a less unhinged ask but multiple edition because you’re the one FCD member I haven’t personally victimized or interrogated

WOULD YOU RATHER

• Face off against Donna in a fist fight (you HAVE to defeat her in order to be released from the ring, she doesn’t want to fight you but she isn’t being given a choice)

• Deal with the stans, Mia, Miranda and Cassandra all over the course of 6 hours (how you deal with them is up to you, do tell how you’d deal with them)

Dealing with them: nullify them so they can cause no more harm

And an additional ask, do you have any pets? What kind of pets?

Do you play any games? Which games? :)

just when you thought the fire wouldn't burn to ya own doorstep 💀

1.) hmm obviously, fist fighting donna is a "hell nah" I mean come on not like I would could ever lay a finger on her, I ain't no wife beater 🗣️‼️

which now led us to face the other option... sigh

I think the stans and mia are relatively easy as long cassandra isn't mentioned in a convo/do something that could endangered the filipino twink. I have plenty of experience dealing with the ✨popular griles✨ for example, just be their dog

ughm I mean ughh yeah what I'm saying is I can deal with these kind of people if needed, as for "nullify" them welp they wouldn't cause any harm as long I'm smart about my mouth 💀

for cassandra herself I think she wouldn't actually be too hard either, at most I got my ear yapp off or get flirt ig 🤷 which both are fine with me 😔(😏) engaging some convo with cass would actually be fun though ngl

last but not least, miranda the bird bitch herself 👏 there no room for me to speak, she's the one to decide how to deal with me 💀. honestly though, I imagine miranda would just be the typical headmistress to npc student, so at most she's just gonna ask me a lot of stuff about my grades 💀

now that I think about it I rather spend the time with donna instead🧍huh what you say? I have to DEFEAT her in order to get RELEASED from the ring? who say I wanna get released 😏 (ayo bro???

2.) I only got one doggo (milo) as for now, another precious old baby just passed away not long ago 🕊️, though I am more of a cat person lmao ':3c

3.) as for games, mostly gacha games rn like hsr/re1999/path to nowhere, they all got good artstyle and amazing plot lines which made sense that I also enjoy some visual novels, or interactive story based game like life is strange etc

[tragicstarz]

Something I always think about when it comes to Gus’s death (if i remember correctly) is the

fact that it could have been stopped if Jesse did end up shooting Walt in his house. Jesses motive for this was because he had just figured out that Walter was the one who poisoned Brock but immediately as Jesse is holding the gun to his head, Walter manipulates him into thinking again it was actually Gus rather than himself because of how Gus, earlier in the show, “let that other boy get murdered” which brings Jesse around enough to where he doesn’t shoot Walter. Then this allows Walter to continue on with his plan on killing Gus without Jesse getting in the way and having Jesse think he was the good guy in this situation and Gus was a devil spawn so that Walter could carry out his plan without Jesse disagreeing 😭 even Giancarlo, Gilligan, and Gould all say that they believe Gus to have morals and not be completely batshit crazy like the others even though he lets a lot of things slip through the cracks *cough* *cough* nacho *cough* *cough*

Something else that pisses me off about Walter white is the fact that after you see better call Saul, Walter just looks like some random dick that waltzed in and destroyed everything everyone had worked so very hard for. And all because Gus let him into the operation. at first, Gus didn’t want Walt and Jesse working for him because of Walt’s clumsiness and jesses inability to be sober but suddenly some way some how Walter woos Gus over. This is because Walter starts to talk about family to Gus. I believe that the sole reason for Gus and Max coming to Mexico and out of Chile was because Gus’s dream was to be apart and have a family of his own. But because of hector, that plan obviously went down the drain. I mean, I also feel like Gus also feels the need to fit in and be respected. He’s not respected and doesn’t fit in with the cartel and he has had to EARN his respect and his spot with the Albuquerque community (DEA, fire department etc). I think he also feels the need to be apart of everything and be the benefactor for so many things because of this respect and this normal life he wants so badly but with his sexuality and his nationality etc he feels it’s hard for him so he has to do EVERYTHING to give his best attempt to gain that positive attention… I feel like it’s not a mask he wears but something way deeper than that. I love his character I just wish they went deeper on screen instead of the people who love Gus having to do deep psychological analysis on him lmaooo. But Walter talking about family sparked something in Gus because Walter had something that he didn’t and if he did have it- he would care the same and even more about his family because if I remember correctly Walter was talking about how his family needed the money and he wanted to protect them. Sigh. Gus my little sad lonely criminal that just wanted to fit in 😔

[derangedanomaly]

Welcome to incorrect quotes with our fav squad (kris, ace, blade, lilian)

Blade: Fuck capitalism. It's a rigged system that keeps us poor and it isn't fair. You shouldn't need to work three jobs to afford basic necessities. Blade, playing Monopoly: Sorry, if you wanted to win you should have tried not being poor.

~

Blade: Hey! Wanna hear a joke?

Ace: Sure.

Blade: Your life!

Ace: Actually, my life isn’t a joke, jokes have meaning.

Blade: Ace no.

~

Lilian, lying on the floor, depressed: I'll never be a cop. I'm gonna have to be a robber.

~

Blade: Lol. Heads up if you try to make a candle with food coloring, the food coloring will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom all the food coloring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you’ll throw your tea on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food coloring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter. Please take my word on this.

Lilian: What did you do Blade?

Blade: a Mistake.

~

Blade: HELP! I TOLD LILIAN I'D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN'T COOK!

Ace, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I would help?

~

Ace: While I'm gone, you're in charge Blade.

Blade: Yes!

Ace, whispering to Kris: You're secretly in charge, but I don't want them to feel bad.

Kris: Obviously.

~

Blade: Advice of the day kids, if you ever meet someone who calls Gatorade flavors the actual name of the flavor instead of just the color then they are a certified nerd.

Ace: Yeah but you have to specify, frost glacier or cool blue? You can’t just say blue because there’s more than one blue.

Blade: Blue and light blue, nice try nerd.

~

Blade: I know this isn’t going to end well and I don’t care. So don’t you try and stop me, Lilian!

Lilian: I wasn’t stopping you. I was asking if you had a spare camera so I can record this.

~

Lilian: You are an absolute fucking dork.

Blade, singing: Yeah, but I'm your dork!

Lilian: *sighs* Yeah, you're my dork.

~

I'm gonna do this more often it's so fun

Blep:p

LMAO- I DECIDED TO DO SOME WITH LILIAN AND BLADE

—

Blade: Talk dirty to me, baby~

Lilian: The dishes.

Blade: Wh-

Lilian: They’ve been there for 4 days and it’s your turn to wash them. You still haven’t cleaned them and I have asked you to do so several times.

—

Blade: So you like cats?

Lilian: Yeah.

Blade: *tries to impress them by slowly pushing a glass off the table*

—

Lilian: You have to apologize to them Blade.

Blade: Fine! But I must warn you that this might make me a better, nicer person and that is NOT the person you fell in love with!

(it wouldn't make him a better person 😔)

—

Lilian: Are you ready to commit?

Blade: Like, a crime or a relationship?

—

Blade: I want to kiss you.

Lilian, not paying attention: What?

Blade: I said if you die, I wont miss you.

(he's lying his ass off btw 😭🙏🏻)

—

Lilian: Ugh, crushes are so dumb.

Blade: I know. Whenever I’m near the person I like I just start acting stupid.

Lilian: But you’re always acting stupid?

Blade: ...

Blade: Yeah, don’t think about that too hard.

[velvetyh]

it’s meiiii

oh! that sounds SOOO nice, i’m glad that you’re back in your hometown, chilling for a few days. hope that you’re enjoying your time <33 you deserve it !

no like, i get what you mean. i HATE these kind of situations SO much bc it lowkey feels like you need to idk… “sacrifice” something. like, you like the job itself but your colleagues not so much (or at all), so it’s like - you either let go of the good job in order to keep your peace of mind OR you tolerate ugly people so you can keep the good job… sigh…

i can’t only pray for you and hope that some clarity gets send to you. and you should know that whatever decision you take, it's okay, it's the right one - don't regret it, don't look back and think "i should have...", no, you took a decision that, at the time you did, you believed was the right one ! that’s it, don’t look further into it. and remember, sometimes we must let go of certain things, of certain opportunities, close a few doors so new ones can open ! believe in yourself, babe. you got this <3

GIRL be so fr, you’re talking to someone with a PhD in yapping lmaooo we should probably use messages more often so we actually gossip about our lives and so 🙂‍↕️

i knowwwww, tumblr has become SOOO demotivating ))’: like… almost no one interacts any more, very few people reblog and leave tags commenting on your posts, it is so sad actually.

also, i’d love for you to give me an honest (not brutal, just honest😔) review on my last cobtober chap cause’ i actually lowkey hated the result… and it just made me want to never again write “sub” jacob, like ever 😭 ITS JUST NOT FOR ME

thank you so much, you’re so sweet ily :( i’m also grateful to be back home but it’s so hard to stay only a week there 🥹

im trying to chill but with my dad around, its not that easy :// but i try nonetheless!!

yeah, i really feel like i need to choose between having a good job and shitty colleagues or nice colleagues and a shitty job… plus if you switch jobs to another company, hoping for change, you never know if it’s going to be better, or worse. my current colleagues are nice (most of them), but i know they wouldn’t hesitate to stab me in the back if it could get them a promotion or appear nice to the boss. so i just stay professional and distant, but then i get remarks that im not opening up enough to my colleagues and i don’t want to integrate myself in the team. im not going to give weapons to my "enemies" to stab me!!

it’s really sweet of you to keep me in your prayers, it really means a lot to me 🫶🏼🥺 it’s hard for me to have some clear-headedness in this cloudy part of my life, i play it by ear and it’s really not that easy when you have very various opinions around you, telling you to do this and that or no wait, do this and that instead.

your words really mean the world to me :( i made some decisions in the past that made me doubt myself and i still feel guilty about them today… thank you, really 🫶🏼

i love how easy it is to talk to you, youre so sweet and i love getting messages from you !! we should totally message more sissldfjsns id really love to!

yeah, it’s so sad how tumblr has become a ghosted place… i know i didn't help the cause bc i kinda disappeared for a year bc of writer’s block but i hadn't expected the place to be this deserted lol

i know i said id give you feedback on your project yesterday (im so sorry i haven't said anything yet) but my mom dragged me to her friend’s house to say hello and i was unable to touch my phone for the day. today im going shopping so when i get back home ill write you an ask about it (honest, not brutal 🫶🏼) so you can choose whether you want to post it or keep it for yourself 🫶🏼

[spacedlexi]

i always wondered if you ever read any violentine/twg fanfiction and if you have could you tell us your favorites? Or what tropes would you like to read? Idk I just really like this ship and since there was so little content I could find so i read a lot of shit 💀 but I hold a special care for it since it was one of the first fandoms I entered and finding out Clem was bi meant a lot to me cause you don't see a lot of bi representation that isn't like "I like fucking anything that moves���(Yea Im looking at you Elite)”.

So yeah I'd like to hear you thought of fanfiction and stuff.

i tried once or twice but didnt get farther than the first chapter or so on the few i tried 😔 i kinda for the most part stopped reading fic after high school to be fair, so im very particular about what i Do read when it comes to fic now. and on ao3 at least since im afraid of wattpad there really hasnt been anything that held my attention (at least in the past. like i said i havent tried looking in a couple years so who knows). i need plot/character development heavy stuff that i can really sink my teeth into and i didnt really find much of that... and the "tropes" i like are more determined by which characters im applying them to so i dont always like the same ones across the board

someone asked me this question a while ago and i asked for any fic recs at the time but i only got like.. one? im really not sure what the state of twdg fic is like honestly

DESPITE all that tho im still slowly slowly SLOWLY meticulously steadily working on my own oneshot that i WILL FINISH I SWEAR its over 20 pages currently and only like 2/3? done?? and half edited BUT it IS outlined so..... i just have to.. you know..... actually Finish it....

i posted some snippets from it a while ago (HERE) but here's a couple longer ones since ive written about 10 more pages (plus like 5 in outlines) since then. im Really particular about the flow of my writing which is like.. the main reason why i take so long to write.. gotta fix it until it Feels Right

A comfortable silence seemed to settle over them then. The wind outside the shack still blew harshly, whistling against the broken windows. But as the girls sat by the warm glow of the fire, and listened to the crackling of the burning logs, it was enough to melt their tension. At least a bit.

The silence continued until the fire began to dwindle with the last of the logs. "We're going to have to start burning those..." Clementine said as she looked at the loose boards they had kicked aside earlier.

"I got it," Violet said as she stood, not even giving Clementine a chance to move. As she grabbed a board and kicked hard at its center, trying to break it in two, Clementine twisted her mouth. Not at the other girl, but at herself. She was still getting used to her new limitations, and it frustrated her knowing there were just certain things that she couldn't or struggled to do now.

The boards had been sturdy once, but due to age and exposure, they had eroded enough that Violet was able to break them with relative ease. She threw a couple of the pieces on the fire and set the rest by the hearth as she returned to where she had been at Clementine's side. She gave her a soft, reassuring smile as the fire came back to life, and Clementine gave a soft smile in return, breaking her from her thoughts, if only momentarily.

She heaved a sigh as her eyes were drawn back to the missing portion of her left leg. She thought about the trek awaiting them in the morning, and her mouth twisted again. "Ugh, walking through all of that snow is gonna fuck up my leg..."

The soft smile on Violet's face became mischievous. "Don't worry, I can just carry you instead." She said it nonchalantly, but the fluttering in her chest betrayed her.

Clementine quirked her eyebrow in response to the bold statement, smiling skeptically as she laughed "Uh, aha, yeah right."

"What, don't think I can?" Violet responded, the look on her face unbothered by the other girls reaction. "Brody was the one who carried you to the school after you crashed and I'm, like, at least as strong as Brody was."

Clementine's face dropped at the revelation. "Wait-... Brody brought us back?"

"Uh..." Violet hesitated at the change in Clementine's voice. "Yeah... Her and Marlon. She was the only one he would ever take outside the safe zone." She explained, and as an aside to herself said "Huh, guess it makes sense now..."

The playful atmosphere had now quickly disappeared, only to be replaced with a quiet, somber one. In the short time Clementine had to get to know Brody, she felt they had started to become friends. However, there weren’t many good memories made between them, and so Clementine more easily remembered the bad ones.

She could still remember that stormy night in the cellar clearly, could remember the sounds of Brody's inhuman screeching. The hot blood on her hands as she fought against the turned girl for her life. The guilt sinking in her chest like a black hole as she looked over what she had done. What she had to do. Clementine mourned her in the way she mourned everyone else she had lost. And it never got any easier.

Violet watched Clementine as she internally fought through her feelings, and once again regretted her words. She didn't want to think about Brody, either. And felt guilty over unintentionally bringing those awful memories to the surface. Clementine told them what Marlon had done that night, yet never talked about what happened after. But Violet had helped the others with the bodies, had seen what Clementine was forced to do. She remembered the sight clearly, as clearly as she remembered feeling that Marlon got what he deserved.

--

"Maybe we should try to get some sleep before it gets cold in here..." Clementine suggested tentatively.

Violet shifted, stretching her arms out in front of her, catching the last of the heat from the hearth on her fingers. "We should use the bed, then. It'll at least be better than the floor. Plus, there's a blanket."

Violet stood up then, stretching her legs as Clementine looked up at her. "Are you sure that thing isn't completely rotted?"

"It should be okay. We only brought it in here a little over a year ago."

"'We'? Why?"

"Uh-" Violet started at that, averting her eyes. "Um... Minnie and I... we kinda... used to hang out here..."

"Oh..." Clementine wasn't sure what to say to that, but it did confirm her suspicions. So instead, she relented. "Okay."

But she hesitated, looking between her leg and her prosthetic where it still sat propped against the side of the fireplace. "Hmm..." Should she put it back on? The bed wasn't far...

"Here," Violet reached her hand out, noticing the hesitation, "let me help you."

Clementine eyed the outstretched hand, considering her options, and once again twisted her mouth at her new limitations. She kind of hated this. She had done everything on her own for so long, and now...

"C'mon, it's okay."

She looked back and forth between Violet's face and outstretched hand a few times before finally relenting. "...Fine." She really didn't want to lace up her prosthetic just to immediately take it off again.

Clementine took her hand, and Violet helped pull her up to stand. They leaned close as she found her balance, gripping tightly at Violet's shoulder with her free hand. It only took a short moment, and once Clementine stabled herself, her eyes locked with Violet's. They both started a bit when they noticed how close they had become, face to face.

"Aha. Um, you good?" Violet asked, slightly flushed.

"Yeah," Clementine said, hiding her blush better than the other girl. "Thanks."

[khaleesiofalicante]

"Godhood is just like girlhood: a begging to be believed" -forgot the author but this quote gives me chills

David represents me, like, everyday I try to wake up, but can we talk about how fucking funny it is that Alec can't think of another way to wake him up than just, pulling at him??

I was soo confused on why they were in the Unseelie Court for a hot min, ngl

David wanted his hand to be the only one holding Max. Only his lips know what Max tasted like. I love my two obviously boys not knowing the other feels exactly the same 🥰

David sighed. “Mr. Lightwood-Bane, I don’t want to train.”

“It’s Alec,” the man corrected. “Or Uncle Alec.”

David made a face.

Yeah, I kinda hate that too😂 But omg I love how Alec respected that he didn't want to fight💙💙💙

THE WAY DAVID AND MAGNUS JUST FIGHT WHEN THEY ARE PROTECTING BUT NOT BECAUSE THEY WANT TO🥺🥺

But they had never forced him to train. Not even once. Instead, his parents had trained harder themselves, because they had one more person to protect. THIS FAMILY>>>>

David immediately felt uneasy. He didn’t like it when other people touched his books. I understand this man on a personal level 😔

The Prince of Darkness had the blood of Lucifer. FUCK FUCK FUCK WTF??? Now I have more questions than before 😭

Going from promising to protect the love of his life to protect the love of his son's life in Rome💙

THE AMOUNT OF SASS DAVID AND ALEC HAVE TOGETHER ITS PURE GOLD JDVDJDJ

David chuckled. “There is a new travel year student from Abu Dhabi called Basheer who is nice.”

“Is he cute?”

Now he is just trying to kill that poor boy😂😂

How can they go from making me laugh with their interactions to making me cry form the immortal warlock angst???

“Gratitude has nothing to do with love,” Alec pointed out. “And I understand. I told you, it’s not easy.”

///

“I don’t think he feels you don’t care enough. You care a lot for Max,” David replied. “Maybe Magnus is worried he won’t be able to make up for it after…well, you know.”

If you put them both together they are amazing at this!! Why can't they talk like this and figure shit out more often???

David dragging Alec to see museums and historical places is a content I never knew I needed 😂😂

DAVID AND ALEC BONDING OVER RACING CARS. HOLY SHIT. I NEVER EXPECTED THIS AND YET THIS WILL LIVE IN MY MIND FOREVER JSHDKDKDKD

Can we just fast forward 15 years in the future where Mavid and Rosewood live close by with their kids and it's all good and happy and not people wanting to kill them??

“Put your seat belt on,” David said.

“There isn’t time for that-”

“PUT YOUR SEATBELT ON!” David yelled.

Alec did as he was told.

Safety is no joke to this man

He was driving like the goddamn devil himself.

“David,” Alec said carefully, clutching the car seat tightly. “You realize we’re trying not to die, right?”

Look, I know this is all horrible right now, and I want to kill Mallory and Logan so bad, but it's just this is so goddamn funny jshskdjdkdk

“I’ll be fine,” Alec said as he climbed to the roof of the moving car. “And David?”

“Yeah?”

“If you ever drive like this when my son is in the passenger seat, I will feed you to an Iblis demon.”

He heard David’s delirious laughter. “Noted!”

David: *having Truth or Dare flashbacks*

Alec walked to the warlock and grabbed him by his t-shirt. “WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?” IS MALEC A JOKE TO YOU???

Alec be like: he is trying to kill me, David and the love of my life, but I draw the line at hurting the Maserati!!!

“Did you just hit him with a book?” Alec asked.

David pulled him out of the car and exhaled deeply. “It’s a hardcover.”

He is my role model in life!!! It's hard seeing other people living your dream😔

Logan chuckled softly. “Sweety, that’s not even close to what we have planned for you.” WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT BITCH PLANNED FOR HIM???

He smiled.

The same smile Alec had seen on Jace before he did something incredibly brave and incredibly reckless.

Max is not here to say it, so I will: that was kinda hot😎 No but honest talk, everytime I forget how unhinged this man is, you hit me with a wall to remind me. Not complaining....

“We go to Devlin Corp and set the fucking place on fire until they tell us where David is,” Lexi said as if it is the obvious solution. I agree with all her plans at this point

“Don’t lie to my face,” Magnus hissed. “I know you have been teaching him warlock math.” I KNEW HE KNEW!!

“Are you mad at me?” Nicolas asked, his voice soft. “For teaching him?” You can't be math at him with that face!! I SAID WHAT I SAID!!

“I didn’t,” Leviathan shook his head. “I created the seashell for his equal.” God I hate princes of hell and his riddle-like talking. At least he is funnier than his siblings...

Max broke down in his arms, crying and shaking and gasping for breath.

Magnus didn’t know what to do.

So, he played his part and did his duty.

He held his son.

Max crying and Magnus consoling him is both the best and the worst thing😭😭

“Fine. I will text you,” Ragnor huffed. “It truly is the end of the world.” I missed his sass and exasperation so much 🥰

“What does that mean then?” Rafael asked. “Only the person who is destined to use the seashell can touch it?” Wait, so, why could Max, David and Alec touch it?? They touched it on the last part, didn't they??

Rafael kissed her on the nose. “Go. I’ll keep an eye on Idris.”

“And maybe take a shower,” Anjali wrinkled her nose.

Rafael stuck out his tongue. “I’m stress sweating, woman!”

“And I still love you!” Anjali yelled back as she walked away

✨ ❤️ ROSEWOOD SUPREMACY ❤️✨

Rafael wanted to throw everything away and go comfort his brother.

He wanted to pick up his sword and wander around the world looking for David.

But he couldn’t.

There is something so personal about the Lightwood-Bane siblings for me 🥺🥺

“I think David is not coming back,” bapak whispered. “And I’m scared it’s going to drive your brother into madness.” It would drive ME into madness so we can't really blame him...

“We already have seven,” Anjali informed a little smugly. God, Rafael wanted to marry her yesterday. Anjali is just... AHHH I ALSO WANT TO MARRY HER😍😍😍

“I asked someone who is very good at hiding to find them for me,” Anjali winked. KIT. OMG THE PIECES ARE COMING TOGETHER!!

THEY ARE UNITING THE ELDEST CURSES!!! HOLY SHIT!!! I AM LITERALLY SHAKING. THIS WAS SOOO GOOD WTF??

Loved this chapter as always. I can't wait for Tuesday!! My mom is concerned as to why am I screaming at my screen🙂

Song rec: Lonely Ones by LOVA (It was on the Young Royals playlist and I can't stop listening)

Idk why but this live blog made me so emotional 🥺🥺🥺

And thank you for the song rec! The season 2 playlist was so good! I loved it so much!

I really liked Most Beautiful Boy 😭😭😭

[atopearth]

Court of Darkness Part 8 - Jasper Lane Route

Jasper seems nice and attentive, like a perfect butler🤔 But Guy will always be his first priority so hmm. Anyway, I feel so bad for the heroine. She was practically forced into dancing with Guy when she doesn't even know how to dance, and it was in front of people too. I can't imagine how crap she must feel even if Guy used magic to make it seem like she danced okay since the point was, she didn't enjoy it at all. Aquia is such a nice boy🥺 he helped tend to the heroine's swollen feet after dancing🥺 Um, I was just about to say Sirius is pretty hot, even though a bit sketchy, and a route for him would be nice, but now that I look closer at his face, isn't he Jasper??😶 The heroine really needs to be more cautious!! Following this random guy to a tavern and taking a drink from him instead of herself, she really should have just tried to look for Haru again. I'm not even sure if he put something in her drink or she's just weak to the spirits in this world. Anyway, regardless, he's really taking advantage of her😶 and he's figured out her powers, and sounds like he's going to use her. He definitely drugged her. Yikes. There goes his gentleman image I was so fond of. Heroine can't catch a break with a crazy possessive master and now the drugging valet😔

Anyway, it seems like the heroine's life back in her own world is quite saddening since she lost her parents in an accident and the only family she has left is Haru. I'm glad she at least has Haru in this world with her. Haru is so loyal to have been waiting by the academy gates for her the whole time after he got picked up by Fenn🥺 Anyway, these guards are pretty chill considering she didn't come back to the academy for a night. Honestly, I blame Toa and Guy for being childish and that's why she ended up going out anyway!! Not as much Toa though, because at least when Guy decided to pull her out of the classroom, he wasn't childish enough to continue pulling her back and hurting her. Guy is definitely annoying though. I have to agree with the heroine. He dragged her away from Toa only to force Jasper to teach her because he has no time, like seriously, Toa was the teacher for her class, of course he should be teaching her if she doesn't get it, and here you are barging in ughhh. Otherwise, I think Jasper and the heroine's tutor-student relationship to be rather cute, since she tries hard and he puts a lot of care and effort into teaching her the things she doesn't understand. Honestly, I wish I could enjoy the Jasper moments more because him kissing her on the cheek on their date was so cuteee, sigh, all I can think of is how he's definitely going to ruin these precious moments😔 I feel so bad for the heroine that she had to kiss Guy to save him from the poison. Especially in front of Jasper.

Props to the heroine for trying so hard to tell Guy that his life is in danger. Like, okay he can't do much about it and stuff considering the chaos that could ensue so he has to fend it off himself but seriously, can't he acknowledge or appreciate the heroine a bit more? He doesn't need to thank her but I'd be grateful if he was less dismissive zzz. Anyway, the heroine finally found out Sirius is Jasper and he had to say things in the most terrible way. I'm still not sure if they really slept together, but if they did, he's the most vile guy ever. I'm still pretty disgusted and uncomfortable with him anyway and I feel bad for the heroine. Jasper is probably using the Sirius appearance pretending to go along with their plans to see who is really trying to kill Guy but yeah, still zzz. Lmao at the heroine totally ruining their plans, I guess Guy underestimated how much her lessons with Jasper have helped her improve in using magic. But yeah, it was nice to see Jasper care for her. Honestly, I was pretty moved when Jasper went against Guy to ask him to yield the heroine to her. Considering how much he listens to Guy, reveres him and will do anything he asks, it's pretty sweet to know that he loves the heroine so much that he's willing to risk his bond with Guy. Anyway, as expected, Guy doesn't really care as long as she's with the Avari lol.

Wow, I didn't think that Guy and Jasper would be bound by magic, and that Guy actually gave him some of his magic. But at the same time if Guy was in life threatening danger, he could take that magic back and it could possibly kill Jasper. The other stuff are useful though, like Guy knowing wherever Jasper is, and being able to summon Jasper no matter where he is. It's a forbidden form of contract magic, but to think Jasper and Guy trust and love each other enough to form that contract when they were young is pretty wow. Awww it's so cute how all the other valets are so happy about Jasper's return, they're such nice buddies! LOL at Guy getting annoyed when Jasper said he will protect the heroine with his life, I died when Guy called him a traitor and philanderer😂😂😂😂

Anyway, overall, Jasper’s route was rather cliche with the “acting as a spy in disguise to try and catch the people aiming for Guy’s life” part of the story, which played out okay I guess, because I found it hilarious how the heroine ruined their plans lol. But I honestly still find the beginning of this route rather uncomfortable. Not only do I think that there was honestly no reason for us to be introduced to Sirius in that way, but it really didn’t make me interested in Jasper more in any way, other than feel rather disgusted with that part of him lol. Personally, I feel like if they removed that part, I would have liked Jasper a bit more because I have a thing for guys who are loyal to their masters lolll, but yeah anyway, I really felt like that encounter was pointless because I’m sure he could have figured out her powers another way. Anyway, if we ignore that part of the story, I do really like the gentleman Jasper is and how caring and attentive he can be. But I guess, that’s not the main part of him, so I’m just liking the superficial part of him lolll. I guess I can just stay disappointed that I didn’t get the gentleman I really wanted from this route lol.

[sarah-sandwich]

if you’re taking prompts,,, #14 from list 2? whichever characters you like

I tried to stick to writing the whump I really did. I’m just no good at it 😔 So here’s de-aged Peter instead ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ [Read on AO3]

14. “Don’t Hurt Him!”

“Don’t hurt him!”

“I’m not hurting him! Calm down!”

“He doesn’t like it! Let him go!”

“Peter, I swear to God if you don’t get off of—,”

“Give him back!”

“Peter!”

Harley’s chair topples as the weight of the super-powered four-year-old’s body slams against it. Stupidly, he cradles the stuffed Elmo protectively against his chest and lands hard, flat on his back. All the air punches out of his lungs and for a long moment, all he can do is lay there in shock until his lungs remember how to pull in air.

“Oh no! Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” he wheezes.

“Not you,” Peter says with all the vitriol his four-year-old self can muster. “Elmo doesn’t like you. Give him back.”

Wordlessly, Harley hands over the stupid Elmo, no longer caring that the batteries are dead. Peter can have the stupid dead toy if it means a moment of peace.

Peter scrambles up the wall and stands upside-down on the ceiling, safely out of reach, and gives Elmo a hard shake. “He’s not talking! Why isn’t he talking?!”

He closes his eyes. He can’t do this. He can’t.

The elevator dings, announcing a new arrival to the penthouse and he nearly cries. Very nearly. Then Tony enters the living room and his eyes mist up.

“Hey there, Peter-Peter Pumpkin Eater,” Tony coos, instantly spotting him on the ceiling. “Were you a good boy for Harley?”

“Harley was mean to Elmo and now Elmo won’t talk!” Peter exclaims, scurrying down the wall before launching into Tony’s arms.

Tony grunts on impact, but catches him without issue.

“Oh?” Tony says, smirking at Harley with an amused twinkle in his eyes as he straightens up with Peter on his hip.

“You can’t do that,” Harley says from the floor. “It’s been like 30 minutes. You can’t start calling him cutesy toddler names.”

“Just think of how embarrassed he’s going to be when we get him aged up again,” Sam says, bypassing Tony to collapse on the couch with a sigh.

“Fair point,” he agrees, not with a small amount of vindictiveness.

It’s been the worst half-hour of his life. Peter seems to remember everyone except him. Which is stupid and doesn’t make any sense because he didn’t know Tony or the other Avengers when he was this young so why is it that he seems fond and happy to see all of them but he treats Harley like a nanny that has fallen out of his favor? He hates to admit it, but it hurts.

“What did Strange say?”

“Something along the lines of, ‘I’m off-world for the foreseeable future, figure out your insignificant problems on your own’.”

Harley’s stomach drops to his toes. He sits up. “Are you serious? So he’s stuck like this until whenever Strange comes back?”

“Nah,” Sam says. “We talked to Wong and he said it should wear off on its own. Usually lasts a few hours.”

He groans and flops back. He can’t handle Peter as a toddler for any number of hours. He could hardly stand him for the minutes he’s already suffered.

“Don’t worry,” Tony says, “you’ll have your boyfriend back in no time. For now, Petey-Pie has a play date with Miss Morguna that she is very excited about.”

“Yay!” Peter cheers. He doesn’t so much as wave goodbye over Tony’s shoulder as he’s carried off down the hall.

Sam clicks his tongue in the silence that descends in their wake. “Jealous of a toddler. Not a good look, man. Not a good look.”

“Shut up.”

~*~

“Harley.”

“Harley, wake up.”

He flinches back from the sticky finger that pokes his cheek and blinks blearily down at little doe-eyed Peter with his mop of curls and pudgy cheeks standing beside his bed in a borrowed pair of Morgan’s Spider-Man pajamas.

“Ev’rythin’ okay?” he asks, tongue thick with sleep.

“Can I sleep with you?” Peter asks, an anxious tightness to his mouth that’s familiar from his adult-self.

“‘Course,” he says. He scoots back and is surprised when Peter doesn’t hesitate to climb in bed and curl up against his chest, clutching his t-shirt tight in his little fist. He curls his arm around Peter’s back and he relaxes. “You sure you’re okay?”

Peter nods against his chest. “Just wanna be normal again,” he says, voice small. “Feels wrong like this.”

Harley frowns, his heart rate escalating as his mind jumps to the worst conclusions. Is his Spider-sense trying to tell him something? Is it the spell? Is he going to de-age further rather than revert back to normal? What if Peter blips out of existence without warning?

Peter puts a hand over his heart and rubs it in little circles like how he’s seen May do against Peter’s back when he’s stressed. “No scared, Harley.”

“Sorry. What feels wrong, Pete?”

There’s a long pause where Peter doesn’t answer, then he finally says, “You. Me. I don’t… I just wanna go back to normal.”

His chest caves in around his heart. “I feel wrong?” What is this? Is he getting broken up with by a four-year-old? What the fuck? He pulls away and sits up.

“You don’t have to be in here with me if I make you uncomfortable. Tony—,”

“No!” Peter exclaims, sitting up as well. “No, you don’t—” He makes a frustrated sound and hits the bed. “I miss you!”

“I’m right here, Pete,” he tells him, desperately lost. “I’m not going anywhere, buddy.”

“I know. That’s not what I mean! I remember, okay?” he says, staring up at him with wide serious eyes. “I remember how it was before and I don’t want any of that yucky stuff.”

Harley stares at him. “Pete, I’m not gonna kiss you while you’re a fucking four-year-old. That is literally the last thing you need to be worried about.”

“Are you sure?” Peter asks, eyes dark and wide.

Harley can’t help but laugh, relief coursing through him like a drug. “Yeah, bud. I’m a hundred percent sure. A thousand percent. That’s not— No.”

His bottom lip puckers out in a way that’s unfairly adorable. “Not even the forehead kind like Aunt May does?”

“Only if you ask me to. Is this why you were such a little shit to me earlier?”

Peter’s chin drops to his chest. “I’m sorry.”

He ruffles his hair. “I forgive you, but when you get big again I’m gonna give you hell for it. It’s only fair.”

Peter pouts up at him again. “No, Harley, please? I’ll be nice now, I promise. I won’t even hog the blankets.”

He snorts. Somehow, at this size, he doesn’t think he could hog the blankets if he tried. “Alright, I’ll let you off the hook this time. C’mon, let’s sleep. I bet when you wake up you’ll be a real boy again.”

They lay down and Peter retakes his place against Harley’s chest, clutching his shirt. “Harley?”

“Yeah?”

“I want a forehead one now.”

“‘Course, sweetheart.”

~*~

The next time he wakes up is to a ripping sound and a weight sinking into the bed beside him as the little body under his arm expands.

He lurches to a sitting position and Peter, his adult boyfriend, blinks up at him.

“Oh thank fuck!” Peter exclaims. He rips up the blanket and groans. “Morgan’s gonna kill me.”

“Peter.”

Peter turns to face him, eyes wide with worry at his serious tone. “Yeah?”

“We’re never having kids.”

[nobody-knose--archive]

(for the cw? crew as we know them so far!) #squad: who's friends with who? what are the squad dynamics like?, (for the standing tally gang (you dont have to do 5 whole songs dhsdfh i just want to hear abt their music taste in conjunction w their styles yknow):) mixtape: 5 songs that describe your OC(s) or songs they themselves would like!

(also unrelated but everytime i go to search your url i type in "nobody" and the first guy to show up is @/andstillnobodylistenstotallyhall and THEN it's you and that feels unfair to me)

cw? up to chapter 2 you say? well.

darius’s been telling amber all it knows about coral (which isn’t a whole lot, but it’s enough to sound meaningful) and that’s led to amber developing a far more human, comfortable friendship with darius compared to a bit of distant reverence for coral. i mean, they’re alien, hundreds of years old, had companions in the past, and they sure don’t act human (or their age). it’s just hard for him to believe they take a lot of stuff seriously- save what he’s seen of their determination to keep their friends safe. maybe he wants to be considered a friend like that. maybe. darius itself is doing its best to be observant of the sort of relationships others are forming with it. coral really wants to take him out and about, show him the world; amber cares greatly about having a friendship that’s normal and honest and true; but jay is harder to read for how they don’t appear to do more than show up when he needs it. beyond the enigmatic behavior and ability to coax a laugh out of him at any time, xe’s for the most part unapologetically helpful and kind. darius has hardly met marcy at all but senses a similar rejection of pretense in eir modus operandi, the main difference being that marcy doesn’t care about forming (new) close relationships at all. that, he can understand. corals a natural leader! has been for all their life! and every single companion they pick up is just another addition to their ensemble, a growing roster of people close to them who’ll eventually end up inspired to strike out on their own and never need them again or get killed. ...at least, that’s how they’re always described. how do they actually feel? they’re cheery. they’re busy. and while they’ll easily enough admit how much better off they are with friends by their side, it takes quite a bit more for them to say how much better off they think their friends are with them. and, if they think the best they can do for their friends is make them better for their own sakes, then maybe that’s alright.

songs songs songs songs. i can either answer this as “what are the characters’ music tastes” or “what songs inspired them” and considering their stands are literally based on songs & not much of my music taste lends itself to character building, i’ll go with the former. the only problem with that is that i am not, in fact, very well educated on what music was hot shit in the year 2006, so yknow. take all this with a grain of salt.

cal. sigh. cal listens to they might be giants. plenty. ween too. if it’s worth anything, it’s also a big fan of old jazz musicians like jimmi hendrix. duncan’s stuck to a lot of the miscellaneous prog rock from when it was young; yes, ritchie blackmore, and fleetwood mac come to mind. ash is the type to subtly judge someone for being a fan of sex pistols. they keep the most current out of everyone, listening to fall out boy & green day & the like. edu was a prince fan! xey would enjoy most psychedelia if xey ever got around to listening to it instead of r.e.m. and billie joel and whatnot 😔. xey also listen to rave/dance music though don’t worry xey’re not hopeless bodur listens to black sabbath. they are also an oasis fan. i cannot elaborate. oh shit i nearly forgot about juno. he was a backstreet boys fan but would never admit it. spends the rest of his time listening to quote un quote “weird shit” like kraftwerk but even more obscure.