#but maybe that means he'd been restraining himself the whole time because of that. and romeo being so happy to have it in the end

[danieyells]

@yuri-is-online @jadeleechsupportgroup

Taiga, Romeo, and Gluttony

NOTE: This post contains spoilers for the entirety of the recently released Auction chapter. Read at your own risk.

So the recent chapter was everything to me. It was the shortest, but in my opinion it showed us a lot about Taiga and Romeo and their relationship to one another, and it also helped me refine a specific thought I had about Taiga and his whole deal he has going on.

To put it shortly; I think Taiga has a gluttony curse, and I think it functions as a mirror to that of Romeo's stigma, and is part of why they had a falling out, and why they can't seem to get away from each other.

To put it horrifically, horribly long....

So what do I mean when I say Taiga is cursed? Well, exactly that. I believe he's cursed in a similar way Rui or the MC are; he has an insatiable need to eat anomalies. I believe that this grants certain side effects like the MC and Rui's curse, and that one of them is a sixth sense for anomalies and anomalous circumstances.

I want to explain this before the Romeo part, because it's the basis for my analysis and thoughts on the two of them.

To start from the very beginning; I think Taiga, during one of his missions, was cursed by something like a jikininki as punishment for his 'gluttony' — the rapid rate at which he completed missions in his first year. This left him with his insatiable need to eat anomalies, but more specifically, is the reason he doesn't seem to want to eat them.

While I'm not certain the anomaly is for certain a jikininki, especially because there's certainly other similar folk legends out there, I chose that one specifically because they are noted for their sharp teeth and for not liking the insatiable need to eat corpses.

Now, what does this mean for Taiga? I think he's stuck between being a ghoul and being a jikininki, or whatever anomaly it ends up being, and I think this has given him a sixth sense that messes with his perception of time, self, and memory. But why would it do that?

Jikininki are immortal creatures, and wish to be freed from the torment they're in for the most part. If one was cursed to be part Jikininki, it would make sense for their existence to be similarly excruciating, with a difference being a lack of full immortality.

Remember the Mortkranken chapter, with the failed mermaid flesh? How their bodies continued even as their minds didn't? Taiga has multiple lines detailing how his 'body' remembers, even if his mind doesn't. Yuri and Jiro also explain that part of the side effects of the reaction are rapid mental deterioration. If Taiga had gone through a similar deterioration, it would explain his seemingly sporadic memory loss (not total blackouts like Jiro, nor specific category based amnesia either, just like. Random shit) and the fact that he doesn't have a concrete sense of identity (showcased through his constantly shifting first-person pronoun choice in Japanese). His cells of his body are reverting to their pre-aged self, and his mind is attempting to do that too, but it's imperfect and messy.

The key to the idea of the sixth sense comes from the fact that he's specifically cursed for anomalous gluttony. I think that he can sense anomalous material or anomalies themselves, and as demonstrated from Ed, this includes some sort of future sense. While we don't know the full specifics of what a sixth sense grants, we can see him utilise it in multiple different places. It's also, in my opinion, why he was sent on the Prologue mission.

Some examples of his supposed sixth sense are how he intuitively understood the anomalous dealer's entire thing, the scenes where he knows the Like Dove will appear before it does, when he senses Romeo approaching (Romeo is carrying an anomaly: his artifact), how he understands the auction is an anomaly, when he gets the mask under unknown circumstances, when he directly knows there's no anomalies... the list honestly could go on forever.

There's one other fact that I personally believe sealed this theory for me; his association with Haku.

In the recent chapter, when the MC is thinking about who to talk to about curses, Taiga instantly knows who we're thinking of, and rejects it on the basis that '[He] can't get rid of curses unless the anomaly that did the deed's right in front of him.' and that he's a 'Simp for the rules anyway.'

... Which is interesting, since it seems like Taiga has tried to ask him about this before. But if you think of this as Haku's stigma, and imagine Taiga trying to get his curse cleansed before, it makes sense! It would also be a good reason to put Haku and Taiga together in the prologue; Taiga can track the anomaly with his sense, and Haku can cleanse whatever curse it gives so long as Taiga manages to capture it or subdue it for long enough.

(Which, side note, is so tragic for the MC...)

Okay, now that the basis of 'Taiga is cursed' is out of the way, how on earth does this relate to Romeo?

Simple. I think Taiga's curse directly mirror's Romeo's stigma, and it's what caused their rift.

Romeo's stigma, as we learn in the new chapter as well, is dependent on his attachment to the items he throws. This, thematically, works with Romeo, who is known to be greedy. Everything he does is motivated by a profit of some kind, whether that profit is social or monetary or whatever. He wants special privileges so he does special missions. He wants money so he raises fees and coerces people to gamble. He wants popularity so he dresses nicely and pampers himself. It doesn't always mean he is money grubbing and stingy (because we see he's willing to spend lavishly on grooming and decor!) but it means that he's attached to what he has. His stigma requires him to give up that attachment. It is a punishment, a sacrifice, as a result of the pact. Similar to how Luca lost his brother (and gained a protective stigma), Romeo has to lose what he feels is worth something in order to fully utilise his ability. Call it a sort of pride.

I think, on the other hand, Taiga's curse is one of envy. He has a desire to eat anomalies, yes, but the desire becomes stronger the more attached someone else is to the anomaly. He doesn't need any interest in it, really. If someone else likes it he will need to eat it.

Taiga covets Haru's Peekaboo to eat instead of the wild one that we also know is in Jabberwock. He's composed about the Like Dove (barely, but he restrains himself!) until Romeo wants it. He steals the plants from Rui's BAR, not the ones in the garden outside (both are Rui's, but his bar is arguably the more loved thing of his since it was fully his choice). He covets Mortkranken's anomalies, and becomes mildly obsessed with the immortal one as soon as it becomes a major research subject. He's also completely fine holding and handling the mask, presumably for a long time, up until Romeo sees it as valuable and worthy.

Now, this doesn't necessarily make them instantly incompatible. But when you take one of Romeo's core traits being 'Greed towards anomalies' (He wants to collect them and frequently complains that other houses are 'stealing' them from under him; he sells them; he gets missions from Hyde to get them; etc), it becomes evidently clear that Taiga's curse is directly oppositional to it.

I think it's pretty obvious by now that Taiga and Romeo have a pretty turbulent relationship now, but were extremely close in the past. Multiple characters state that it would be nice to see them on good terms again, and it's certainly worth mentioning that Romeo is one of the few people Taiga consistently remembers. They both know each other exceptionally well, too. Taiga knows how to get under Romeo's skin and Romeo knows Taiga's habits.

Going back to the idea of this curse causing their rift, if Romeo was constantly on the verge of an important capture, or even if there was just one mission that was important, and Taiga ruined it by eating the anomaly, I doubt Romeo would easily forgive and forget. I think it could very easily cause a massive rift that just kept growing with each new snack Taiga picked up.

I think a moment that gets its nuance overlooked a lot is the scene just before Taiga eats the dove. The Japanese line emphasises that Taiga is referring to HIS heart, that Romeo could shoot through HIS heart, not just a general appraisal of sharpshooting. He even points directly to his heart as he says this, and it makes Romeo hesitate. They're BOTH in pain in this scene. They're both conflicted; this is their ex-partner (which I don't mean in the romantic sense, just in the general sense) who they were very, very close with, and who is now literally at arms length with a loaded gun. Romeo could just shoot him. Romeo could put an end to all of this supposed pain. And Taiga might even let him. And wouldn't that be karma for all he's done? But he can't. He hesitates.

And you know what appears after that? The dove.

This dove that symbolises both general desire (flies over peoples' heads when they're thought about) and Romeo's desire. His desire to escape probation. His desire to make money. His desire to capture, not kill. His desire to reconcile instead of fight. His desire to shoot.

And Taiga kills it. Eats it.

I think this is the most tragic scene between the two of them. This is the crux of it; they both want to reconcile. They want to be friends, to be close, to stop the war raging between the two of them that has done nothing but hurt them both AND hurt the wellbeing of Sinostra, but they can't, because Romeo will ALWAYS desire, and Taiga will ALWAYS take that from him.

It's a cycle they can't escape. The auction chapter shows it too. Taiga is almost disappointed at Romeo's greed. He seems jaded by it, and seems proud and happy when Romeo gives it up for once. Romeo is happy too; MC goes out of her way to say that Taiga handing him the mask makes him look more peaceful than he ever has before. It is quite literally a perfect ending for the two of them and a perfect way to reconcile.

And then Taiga eats it! Again! But I think the most horrifying part of it is that he tries to warn Romeo.

The comic doesn't translate or even transcribe it, so it's so, so easy to miss, especially if you don't speak Japanese, but Taiga grunts out the words 'I', 'Eat', and 'Next' as he approaches Romeo and the mask, and it's the direct reason why Romeo is able to realise that Taiga is about to eat it before it actually happens. He basically just grunts out 'I'm gonna eat that next' as he's fighting against it! But inevitably, neither of them can stop it. The cycle continues.

As long as Romeo is greedy, and as long as Taiga is gluttonous, they will never be able to fully reconcile, no matter how much they both want it. Both of them have to change, but I want to point out that at this moment Romeo is the bigger active obstacle between the two of them. Romeo can't let things go, he holds onto everything and lets it build until it explodes in one way or another. Tiris, his stigma, is symbolic in that sense, that he has to learn to let things go, because if he lets it build too much it will explode spectacularly.

(All of the ghouls have this sort of symbolism with their stigma, so it's not just a Romeo thing, but it's definitely important to his character.)

But Romeo can't get over it yet. He can't get over his greed, he can't let go of things he can't achieve (like getting Kaito's necklace), he can't get over past betrayals (Taiga, what happened with his family, etc)... He's too stuck and stubborn, and his refusal to budge has therefore lead to Taiga's refusal to push. Taiga has stopped caring about getting on good terms because he knows it won't turn out well. He's given up and become cynical, which in turn means that IF Romeo were to change, Taiga... still probably wouldn't. They're cyclical again. Always, always missing each other. So close and yet so far.

I hope the MC can be the catalyst for this cycle to end. Or Ritsu, who is a good equalizer to the two of them. But until she learns to see her own worth in the Academy, and until Ritsu accepts that sometimes he's wrong / he doesn't always know the most out of everyone in the room, I'm afraid Romeo and Taiga will remain stuck in this loop forever...

[themisplaceddemigod]

i'm immortal, i can wait

PJ!Apollo x F!Reader

summary - Apollo has loved you since he first saw you, but he's had to wait several years before he could make such a confession. Especially since you're the child of his scariest uncle, Poseidon.

warnings - Apollo is his own warning. that and his haikus, also i am KEEPING JASON ALIVE in the Trials of Apollo part of this (curse you Rick)

He met you in person when you were fourteen.

Westover Hall, you had been summoned to collect two demigod kids with your brother Percy and friends Annabeth and Thalia. The mission turned sour, Annabeth was kidnapped, and Artemis saved the day before calling him to give you all a lift back to camp.

Both of you could remember how red your face turned when you'd seen him, and he wouldn't tell you but he'd heard you talking about how hot he was with Thalia. It boosted his ego (which quite frankly does not need any more boosting), and he was smug the whole ride.

"Percy, you never told me you had a sister!" He spoke so loudly the whole bus could hear him.

"Um, because we've never met in person?" You brother suggested, a little nervously. Apollo was pretty chill, but that made him even scarier.

The god of the sun just laughed, before turning to look at you. The way his eyes roamed your figure felt less-than-innocent, and your face flushed as you yet again turned a bright shade of red. You couldn't believe the Apollo, the hottest Olympian, was actually staring at you with interest. Like he found you pretty enough to be stared at.

"What's your name, sweetheart?" He smiled flirtatiously, earning some aggressive threats from the Hunters behind you, which he ignored. "Just kidding, I know it already. (Name), right? Pretty name."

You felt as if you might explode. From embarrassment, from being flustered, you didn't know. Maybe he was toying with you, as gods tended to do, but then he looked at you again and genuine interest and attraction glimmered in his stunning blue eyes.

"Thank you, Lord Apollo," you stammered out, unsure of what else to say.

"So shy," he teased, grinning, "Cute. I like you."

Of course, he had to restrain himself from charming you entirely, since you were still a minor. Poseidon would have his head if he touched you at this age, so he decided it was best to wait a few years.

Those few years were full of struggle and pain for you, losing so many friends in the battles with Kronos and then Gaea. Apollo almost intervened just to comfort you several times, but was stopped by his sister convincing him to give you a few more years - and also reminding him that the Olympians could not intervene.

But you grew into such a beautiful, smart, brave woman - and extremely sexy, but he would have to keep that to himself - and Apollo felt lucky to have watched this growth. It made his attraction to you all the more prominent, and he began to feel something he hasn't felt in centuries - genuine. true love.

And it scared him.

His past lovers that he had really, truly loved had both been killed in gruesome ways. He was afraid of what being with him would mean for you, but ultimately decided on getting Poseidon's permission first.

The god of the sea said no.

Then came his trials.

The first demigods he went to were you and Percy, of course. Since he was stuck with an infuriating little girl, he hoped that you might tag along on his perilous journey to make it a little better.

To his delight, you agreed.

"What's so funny?" He demanded when he caught you snickering during a break from all the running.

"You," you laughed, "Never thought the god Apollo would be reduced to an average teenage boy with acne." You laughed even more at that, and he pouted, but enjoyed hearing you laugh nonetheless.

His first sign that you might have a crush on him too came when he mentioned he'd turned some gossipers into ravens just for telling on his previous cheating girlfriend. The mere mention of his ex-girlfriend seemed to irritate you, and Apollo was amused.

Though his turn for jealousy came when he noticed how close you were to Jason Grace. He couldn't do anything, though, so he watched miserably as you got along with the son of Jupiter so well that any outsider would think you were dating.

"What's with the pout, then?" You had asked him when you noticed how upset he looked.

"I am not pouting!"

"Yes you are."

You stepped closer, and your intoxicating scent filled his nostrils. He felt like a schoolboy with a massive crush, just you being that close scrambling his thoughts and making it difficult for him to answer.

"Alright, keep your secrets," you laughed, then walked away, and Apollo was left disappointed.

He was not even going to talk about the whole thing with Reyna. You had suddenly gotten so angry with him after that, you hadn't spoken to him for two days - unless absolutely necessary. It hurt, but he knew you must have been even more hurt by what had been implied.

The end of the trials eventually came and relieved all of you, the defeat of the Triumvirate taking a great weight off the world's - and yours - shoulders. Apollo disappeared after he went to fight Python, and for two weeks you heard no word from him or Olympus.

Then suddenly he was in the middle of camp, spouting the worst haikus you had ever heard in your life. And that was saying something, since all his haikus were pretty terrible.

"Like captured water

You hold me in your cupped hands

I flow on your palm."

Your jaw dropped. That was even worse than you assumed it would be, especially since he chose to center it around the fact that you're a daughter of Poseidon.

"Lord Apollo-"

"See what I did there?" He winked, coming up to you with a cheerful grin. "Did you like it?"

"Well-"

"Fear not! I have another one prepared that is sure to woo you."

Your face flushed, "Please don't say "woo", your kids are listening!"

He was already reciting his next haiku.

"You shatter my sleep

All milk-need and petal lips

You smile and I melt."

You frowned in confusion, "What does that even mean?"

"Aha! See I knew that was the one!"

"I didn't-what?"

He ignored your puzzlement in favour of coming so close to you his overwhelming godly power almost made you pass out.

"I'm sorry I haven't been around for two weeks," he apologised sincerely. "I was in a coma. I swear on the River Styx that it's the truth. But I came here as soon as I woke up, for you." He grinned like that was the best confession he could muster.

"Are you serious?" You breathed out, unable to believe what you were hearing.

"Technically I wanted you when you were fourteen, but that would have come across as creepy apparently," he informed you, "So I had to wait a few years until you turned the right age. That was okay with me, I'm immortal, I can wait."

Your jaw dropped further, "Are you, um-is this-?"

"A love confession? Yes!" He gleefully exclaimed, as if it were perfectly normal for an Olympian to invade camp and profess his love for a demigod.

The entire camp was silent, except for the Aphrodite girls who seemed to be glaring holes into you while trying to curse you - fortunately only the Apollo kids (ironically) had the power to curse a person to speak in rhymes.

"And what did...what did my dad think of this?" You cleared your throat, slightly nervous.

"Oh he was against it at first," Apollo admitted, "BUT he came around. It seems the trials proved a lot more than I thought."

"Well, uh, that's great," you half-smiled, not sure why you felt a sense of dread. This should be the happiest moment of your life.

Apollo's smile faltered, "Do you not-"

"No I do!" You quickly cut him off, sparing him the embarrassment of being rejected in front of a few dozen kids MUCH younger than him. "It's just...you're a god..."

He sighed, "Let's go take a walk."

A few minutes later you were away from prying eyes, sitting by the lake since it always calmed you down. Water soothed you, as cliche as that is for a Poseidon kid.

"I'm just worried," you started after a few minutes of silence, "You know, about all your mortal affairs and having demigod children and all that." You sighed. "I know it's silly. But I just don't think I can go through with it knowing that."

He frowned, but understood, "I can always stop-"

You laughed bitterly, "All the gods promised a woman what. Zeus promised Hera, but there's Jason and Thalia. Poseidon promised Amphitrite, but here Percy, Tyson and I are. It's in your nature, you can't help it."

He felt offended by that, "Yes well, none of them had the displeasure of being turned into mortal for a few months. It changes a god, you know."

You turned to look at him, "Are you really sure about this? That this is what you want? I'm what you want?"

"I've waited for you since you were fourteen," he reminded you, "Of course I'm sure." Despite your reluctance, he took your hand. "Please, just give me a chance."

You thought it over for a moment, before smiling softly, "Fine. You have your chance. But the first mortal affair you have-"

"I won't need them," he smiled, moving closer, "You can have all my children."

Your jaw dropped at his blatant suggestion, a deep blush forming on your cheeks, "Are you crazy?! I can't-"

"You can," he leaned in even closer, "Once I make you immortal."

You started stuttering and stammering just then, uttering some kind of incomprehensible nonsense that the god of the sun just laughed at. He pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead, before finally leaning in and claiming your lips.

He had waited long enough, now he was going to kiss you every chance he got.

[starlightshadowsworld]

To be burned in light

(While Kouyou's in the Agency's clutches, she and Atsushi have an unexpected talk. Atsushi reveals he understands her situation better than Kouyou realises.

Tw for talking about child abuse.)

Atsushi hesitated, his hand hovering over the doorknob. He should leave, he was done here. Kouyou was doing well, she was updated on the plan with Dazai.

The peace between them was delicate. The whole time Atsushi felt like he was standing on ice. One wrong move and it would crack, sending him falling into the icy depths.

What Atsushi wanted to say would no doubt get him stabbed. He would deserve it too, because he would absolutely be crossing a line.

And yet, at the same time Atsushi felt it needed to be.

"Ozaki" 

The Port Mafia Executive sighed, exasperated "what now boy?" She was certain he'd have ran the moment they were finished. The whole time he'd been civil but out of duty.

Much like herself. 

Oh sure Kouyou wanted to attack him. But now wasn't the time for that, not when Kyouka's safety was on the line.

The Agency wouldn't take kindly too the weretiger showing up bleeding out. Besides, Dazai was the brains behind this operation and he'd taken the brat under his wing.

He'd always been protective over who he deemed as his people. Not that Kouyou could say much, she was the same.

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry." Said Atsushi. Kouyou smiled but it wasn't kind. "Whatever for? Taking my dear Kyouka from me?"

Atsushi held back a wince at at. It wasn't the words themselves, but the tone. Chilling, barely restrained rage that reminded Atsushi all to well of the Headmaster.

Atsushi had his back to her but that didn't mean he couldn't feel her sharp gaze on him. He took a deep breath and braced himself.

"I'm sorry that the light burned you."

The smile on Kouyou's face fell. Whatever she was expecting him to say, it wasn't that. Her mind went blank, she couldn't formulate a response. And even if she could, what do you say to that?

Atsushi took her silence and that he wasn't being stabbed, as a sign go continue.

"I don't know you, I won't pretend that I do. Or that we're anything but maybe allies but..." Atsushi takes a deep breath in "the light won't burn Kyouka."

Anger.

Anger like Kouyou had never felt in her life filled her veins. Her composure shattered.

"You know nothing! How dare you, you drag my Kyouka into this destructive light. And than you have the audacity to say that you can gurrantee her safety."

Atsushi didn't so much as flinch at her words. He turned around to face her. The look in his eyes was not one of fright or fear like Kouyou expected, but sadness.

"Because the light burned me too." His voice was soft but there was a strength to it that hadn't been there before. Kouyou was taken aback, she was still angry but curious.

"I was born into darkness. I'll spare you the details but my parents were awful people. One thing led to another and eventually they threw me out" He chuckled, but there was no humour in it.

"Literally, in a rubbish bag. But someone found me, let me out and took me back to his Orphanage." Atsushi wasn't looking at her.

His gaze was fixed on the wall behind her. But it felt like was looking at a person.

"He was the Headmaster. He gave me clean clothes to wear, a place to sleep. And even took the leftovers they had and cooked me some Chakuze. It was the best meal I ever had."

He shakes his head, a sad smile on his face.

"So I ended up staying, not like I had anywhere to go. And I was in debt to him. I'd be dead without him, so I did whatever he ordered me too like a servant to a king."

Atsushi looks at Kouyou. "You stabbed me when we met." It's not accusatory, there's no anger in it he just states it like a fact. "I did" confirms Kouyou, not sure where he's going with this.

"I stopped bleeding before Kunikida and Kenji showed up. Akutugawa cut off my leg off, it came back in minutes." Said Atsushi.

Kouyou nodded, unable to move her gaze away. It's true she stabbed the boy, anyone else would be left wailing in agony before suffering a slow death.

Even without Kyouka's intrusion. Kouyou was one of the best assassins in the Port Mafia for a reason.

She hadn't known Akutugawa had done that. And here it was, like nothing had ever happened.

The weretiger had an incredible healing factor, so to have scars that were clearly years old seemed impossible.

And yet here they were.

She'd have thought he was lying if she didn't know Akutugawa. Or of she hadn't fought the weretiger prior.

"I was mopping the bathroom, knocked over a bucket of water." Explained Atsushi, letting his shirt roll back into place. "I wasn't referring to a literal burn" Said Kouyou, regaining her composure.

But Atsushi just chuckled.

"Yeah, I know. But I figured it'd get my point across."

His smile fell "the man who saved my life turned into my own personal nightmare. That might be the only scar I have to show for it, but I should have so much more."

Kouyou found herself believing him. People like that never striked once, especially if it began over something so trivial."You're afraid we'll do the same to Kyouka."

Kouyou nodded "it's a fair assumption. Besides, how do I know this isn't all a rouse conjured up by your mentor to win me pity."

Even she knew that wasn't the case, but it was hard to accept this. That this boy on some level understood her, that he was trying to reach an understanding with her.

"No one in the Agency knows about my past." Said Atsushi. Kouyou raised an eyebrow in disbelief but Atsushi just shrugged.

"It's true. They know it was rough. But they don't know the details. It took Dazai so long to believe I got kicked out in the first place."

The kid was practically transparent. He was like an open book. A liar he was not and despite herself Kouyou deemed what he was saying truthful.

"Than why tell your enemy? I could easily use this against you."

Atsushi shook his head, amused "can't be any worse than I use it against myself. And if you do... Well it was for Kyouka anyway so it was worth it."

That suprised her.

Kouyou had noticed, she'd have to be blind not to see that the weretiger had a fondness for Kyouka. Almost like that of an older brother, but how? "Why would you go so far for her? You barely know her."

Because as much as Kouyou wanted to deny it, the lad did care. He had been alight with protective fury, so much so he'd been about to attack her before Dazai stepped in.

All because he deemed her a threat to Kyouka. He hadn't cared that she'd attacked him, only that she could hurt Kyouka. That's where his priorities lied, it was clear as day.

She expected the usual response, that it was because he was of the Armed Detective Agency. That he was on the good and just side that saved lives. But that was not the response she got.

"It sounds dumb but... When I saw her on the train with that bomb strapped to her chest. All I could think, was that she looked scared." He hugged his arms around himself.

"I've always been helpless, too powerless to do anything. No one was ever there to help me, no one wanted too. When I looked at Kyouka, I saw myself." Said Atsushi, a frown on his face as he recalled that fight.

"I didn't want to fight her, I had no choice. We found out the bomb was rigged. Kyouka, she said she didn't want to kill anyone else and jumped out the train. I went after her, destroyed the bomb and we fell into the water."

Kouyou absorbed this, and made several mental notes to have a word with Akutugawa... Because to strap a bomb on her Kyouka and rig it to explode no matter what.... He was going to pay for it.

"I see, I can't say I quite understand your reasonings... But I am glad you were there." Kouyou admitted, Atsushi blinked in suprise but than smiled.

"Of course."

Atsushi's gaze flickered to the wall again before looking at her. "The women who treated your wounds was Doctor Yosano. She once worked under your Boss, back when he was underground doctor."

But she wasn't content to let this end there.

"But you may care for her, reluctant as I am to admit it. But who's to say your fellow Agency members won't shun her away. That they won't do as your Headmaster once did to you."

Kouyou blinked in suprise, she hadn't known that. Though it made sense she supposed. Looking back the doctor was kind but she was quite sadistic for one living in the light.

"We didn't even know Dazai was former Port Mafia up until recently, and frankly no one cares." Said Atsushi with a small fond smile. "... I can't tell if that's endearing or stupid" replied Kouyou.

Somehow his confidence was infectious, because she felt her worry dim.

Atsushi shrugs "and well, the President was a former assassin. And between you and me, his ability might just be adopting strays. He wouldn't turn her away." He said, and it honestly suprised Kouyo to hear the unwavering confidence in his voice as he spoke of his boss.

It was still there, but it was less than before. Kouyou knew Fukuzawa, not personally but she'd heard enough to back that claim from Mori himself.

"Will I be able to see her?"

Atsushi looked at her in suprise and Kouyou scoffed. "You haven't won me over yet brat." But it was clear she was wavering. Atsushi didn't comment on it though.

"That'll be up to her. But I won't stop you, neither will anyone else unless Kyouka declines or you become a threat to her."

That, Kouyou would agree with. It didn't escape her that the weretiger specified if she became became a threat to Kyouka. Both of them knew once she returned to the Port Mafia, this alliance was over.

... But maybe this alliance could last just a little longer.

"Very well, I agree to those terms." Said Kouyou. Atsushi nodded, turning to the door. "We can talk when I get another update, but I've taken up too much of you're time. I should go."

He got up to leave but Kouyou stopped him. "Before you go, what is your name?." Atsushi paused, suprised and turned back to her. "It's Atsushi. Atsushi Nakajima."

Kouyou nodded, committing the name to memory. "Thank you, Nakajima." She waved her hand dismissively and Atsushi bid her goodbye and left.

She'd lied, she had another question but hadn't been prepared to ask. Probably because Kouyou had already figured out the answer.

'Why did he apologise?'

It was because Atsushi had looked at her, and he'd seen himself. His Headmaster had never apologised, the man probably never would. So Atsushi had apologised to her, just incase it helped.

Kouyou chuckled to herself, what a strange boy.

She looked out the window, watching the bright cloudless sky. 'I will take you out there and show you the radiant world.' Was what he'd said.

Before the ex Boss found out. And the very light she'd become entranced by, was the very same light that burned her.

Dazai had told her the same fate would not befall Kyouka. But it wasn't until now that Kouyou believed him.It will be kinder to Kyouka than it ever was to her.

'And I hope it this radiant light will he kind to you, Nakajima.'

(To clarify on Atsushi's past, because there's a lot of headcannons about it.

The only part that's confirmed in canon is the burn scars, but not the cause though it seems linked to punishment involving chores. And that yes Atsushi's parents threw him away in a bin in a rubbish bag.)

[senka-mesecine]

Not to be overly angsty, but could you write headcanons for trying to break up with the various platoon characters? And maybeee if you want (and since it’s been previously discussed they’re all a *little* obsessive) some of their reactions could be on the darker side? Thank you.

-

― I imagine everyone would think that a break up with Chris Taylor would be a normal affair; you think so, everyone who knows him thinks so and even Chris himself thinks so about himself --- fact is, he doesn't envision himself as the type to flip out, have a dark side or a messed up reaction where the prospect of you actually leaving rears its ugly head or really, Taylor doesn't think he'd have a nasty reaction regardless of the situation and the context --- he'd ironically be convinced with his whole entire being that's the domain of men like Barnes or Bunny, not him. See, he thinks he's above these day-to-day suburban notions too, dating, break ups and make ups --- all that everyday jazz. If he wanted all of that he would've stayed in college. He's a nice guy regardless. Cool. Righteous. Level headed. He can handle a rejection no problem. He knows right from wrong. He can move on. And all of these traits are genuine in him except when they're not anymore, though. When the break up ceases being a theory just hanging in the great ether without actually happening and becomes a reality now that's when everything dormant inside of Chris begins flooding out and he starts being scary. He'd be so shocked you're actually serious about this he might go the route of smashing things up, getting in your face, arguing with you and even attempting to restrain you from physically leaving. It's not that Taylor's a bad person. Not that he'd do this with malicious intent. He didn't plan on this...at least not unfolding the way it ended up unfolding. It's just that when he's impassioned about something or someone he can end up seeming over zealous and even over-attached to the degree he starts becoming everything he'd never in a million years describe himself as.

― King tells Rhah and Rhah tells Crawford and Crawford tells Big Harold and Big Harold tells Chris and Chris tells a bunch of other people within Elias' squad in the platoon, and regardless if they're still in the army or have already rotated back into the world somehow these boys all find enough mutual solidarity to meet up amongst themselves, communicate, correspond, make plans and discuss the matter of King's break up like it's a tactical issue of great importance (maybe have some weed to commemorate the good old times while they're at it too; swap tales and all that shit) and confront you about it at a later date as well. They function like a brotherhood. React to this like a brotherhood. You break one heart and you've broken everyone's because they possess enough innate togetherness to have each other's back, even if having each other's backs in this case means demanding closure from you or maybe even a one last ditch to try and persuade you to get back with their friend as an united front. All several of them at the same time, yes. Functions suspiciously like an ambush even though they swear, all smiles and jokey attitudes, that that's not what it is. In fact, it feels like breaking up with King you've invertedly ended a relationship with various other people too because it's admittedly a little startling to have a barrage of people, some of which you don't even know and perhaps only just met now, there wanting answers out of you, practically pestering you to give it another shot. They're not wholly unpleasant about it, but yeah, it's all maybe a tid bit obsessive when one really thinks about it; how you're cornered into this. Meanwhile, King himself could be there with the biggest shit eating grin ever like he knows exactly what he's doing.

― O'Neill is an occasional coward in his own right, sure, and as a result one might think he could be too much of a doormat to actually do anything necessarily too awful if he was ever broken up with, but see, I think that's astoundingly untrue because I feel it would be shocking how quickly he could technically go from someone willingly servile and deferential to you to someone downright mean. Making fun of you, being faux-threatening, being a little cruel, going from being your lover to being your very own personal bully, outright lying that he has someone else lined up somewhere waiting for him and that he's flying out to (throws dart) a base in Okinawa to meet up with someone special and have some fun and this is all your doing because you don't know what you're losing out on by being the way you are --- it's all part of the special O'Neill menu under which he covers up just how devasted and afraid of losing you he actually is --- which yes, he wants and needs to cover up to seem tough because if by chance he showed you how he truly felt, he could reveal himself as the losing side over here and that's just no good in his books. So, he overcompensates. There was never a leech so difficult to get rid of as getting rid of Red actually is. He stalks. He prods. He pokes. He taunts. Might give you puppy eyes the next minute. Could whine. Act sleazy. Act smarmy. Could revert to being mean again. But thing is, there's no getting rid of him. It's difficult to tell after a while if his efforts are pathetic, weirdly endearing or both but one almost feels sorry for him. Almost. Funny thing is, O'Neill might just win you back on account of how awfully persistent he is.

― Everyone would assume a break up with Bunny would be unhinged and that's because it would be unhinged; he doesn't accept this pussy shit, as he calls it, and as a result he might do anything from shooting your neighbor's dog, shooting your own, breaking your windows or attempting to personally set your house on fire as retaliation; to him, this is free reign to do just about anything he wants. Heck, Bunny thinks he can do whatever he wants anyway (a notion he developed in the war) but when you give him an excuse as strong as this, all bets are off --- it's like you've left the gates to Disneyland and the Hugh Heffner's Playboy mansion simultaneously wide open for Bunny boy to browse and peruse as he wishes with zero consequences. He doesn't care if you love him or hate him after all of this, so long as you pay attention, even if it's of the most negative variety, he'll be gleefully content because it means he's on your mind and you scarcely have time for anything else seeing as how you're constantly fending off the crazy things your sick ex is doing to mess up your life. He rather relishes this a lot. The role of a sick ex. It's quite funny to him, actually. Bunny might love being your sick ex just as well as he likes being your actual boyfriend. Not a grand difference for him. It's almost hotter this way in his eyes. He gets into it. One could even say he's happy about it because there's seldom been a time this kid hasn't been smiling from ear to ear ever since the titular break up. It is undeniable it turns him on and that he views this as a bizarre form of foreplay and in fact, he ignores the fact you're not together anymore altogether; he meets you at a public place and he might just grin and throw his arm around your shoulder because that's his piece of ass right there.

― You break up with Wolfe and after the initial shock of that wears off on his end he immediately turns it around on you and makes it seem like he's actually the one taking authority and initiative and breaking up with you after you've already done all the legwork of starting this difficult conversation and breaking the ice around it. He's like a General ready for combat after the battle's already been done and concluded. Naturally, this is a self defense mechanism on Mark's part; a slightly spineless one, admittedly. But, no, this was his idea all along, you see, and he doesn't care anymore. Actually, he's walking away from this conversation altogether, so watch him go. That's it, he's going, all exasperated and up in arms. Going before you can actually pitch in with a counter argument that this was actually your decision and he practically usurped it making it seem like he's come up with it and somehow, you're the one seemingly ending up dumped, having no clue how or why it happened. I mean, you did want a break up...and you could be initially relieved it happened so quickly and seamlessly but part of you might have a bruised ego. Perhaps part of you is surprised at this turn of events. Wolfe might've never vocalized this once and now somehow he's the aggrieved party in control. All of this could serve as a bit of clever reverse psychology on his part, see, because now you might actually be tempted to question him why he wanted the break up when he's been nothing but happy up until like...yesterday or confront him that he's being manipulative; but you so long as you're still pursuing him and actively interested in his train of thoughts and he has the upper hand over you. He weirdly enough has a teensy, tinsy hook you in you don't even realize is there. Ironically, he's keeping you around through pretenses. It's a little sleazy but it works.

― Rhah calls you a Jezebel, Desdemona, Eve Accompanied by the Serpent itself, a Siren, the Whore of Babylon, more deceitful than Delilah, Salome and her Seven Veils, a Maneater, a Witch, a filthy Red and any number of creative, poetic epithets you can only really imagine nonironically, in all seriousness coming out of Rhah Vermucci's mouth and nobody else's. In fact, the insults are so flowery and highly decorative at times (even seeming...oddly flattering if you squint) one almost spots the barely concealed twinge of admiration and attraction still very much present even as you attempt to break up with him because while technically offensive, the ways Rhah theatrically describes you to your face in a feverish, passionate heat almost come off like he's describing the most desirable, vicious, alluring person alive and the subject of all his yearnings, all of that being peppered with sexual tension galore. It's like you're standing on the precipice of trying to end things with him or being dragged along for a round of angry hatesex just about now; either outcome is possible, with things weighing closer to winding up with you two desperately heaving and griding up against each other seeing as how Rhah might just be inches from your face, hot breath in your nostrils as he rants and raves how foul you're doing him now. Things could really quickly escalate from a shouting match to a frenzy of hungry, needy kissing where you're practically wrestling against each other and still arguing in between smooches because Rhah might be still there accusing you of being the equivalent of a trickster minx harlot and you very well could be trying to defend yourself. In either case, it's possible this break up goes nowhere because somehow both of you wake up the next morning properly fucked dry, high, sore, groggy and exhausted.

― While Elias might be the one who'd handle the break up with most grace, understanding and even outright forgiveness he also just downright wouldn't move on, in fact, you guessed it --- drugs and narcotics are his prime comfort. He gets high and he decides not to come down because now that you're out of his life there's not much worth coming down for. Not that he's hopeless. Man's sad. Melancholic, is all. He just wants to preserve the sole semblance of all the good feelings he had while you were here replicated in the form of the consolations and the escapism opioids offer; heck, he might even affectionately name his favorite combination of hallucinogenic dry plants rolled into a blunt after you personally because it's that obvious that the only way wants to cope with your absence is by effectively being on some figurative cloud of smoke somewhere, pretending you're there, and if you ever got worried because you did part on relatively good terms, feeling it's only right to check up on him every once in a while for old times sake you might find him entirely buzzed, smiling at you blissed out and vaguely relaxed and happy seeming because he doesn't think you're real. Something a break up from him and King might have in common. In fact, Elias could be all tenderness and emotion seeing you, pulling you close like you could disappear in a whiff of smoke any minute now and say something genuinely tender about how there's so much good in there world and how much of it is contained in you. How long has he been like this exactly? He seems loosened up and generally content but has he simply been in this den all the while smoking? His eyes are glazed over, joyful and distant and he thinks you're a waking dream and there's something bittersweet but a little disturbing about that.

― If you ever wanted to break up with Barnes he might nonironically hand you a gun and say something of the likes 'Go ahead. Do it.' in regards to the fact that if you want to end things you might as well end him. Kill him. He is coldly daring you as well as wholly meaning it with every nonplussed, frighteningly calm bone in his body. Because that's the only way this will ever actually end is if you effectively murder your partner. Widow yourself --- and you either have the guts to do that or you don't and if you don't then go around starting shit you ain't capable of going through with in the first place. That's his whole stance on the matter. If you hesitate he might just grab and turn that very gun, knife, firearm, weapon of murder of any variety around on you and hold the prospect of doing to you dangerously close to completion so it has time to settle into your head. It's a bit like Russian Roulette. That's what a break up technically is in his eyes; it's either or. Total finality. He isn't some sort of snot nosed, green boy, breaking up. Heck, those two words alone sound funny and unnatural even when he says them outloud to the degree he'd much rather do something entirely bloody and murderous to either you, himself or both than ever actually let you go and continue living with that. If he had to live with that he'd much rather return to warfare as a career and keep killing until he's eventually killed or keep the corpses piled up so high he's no longer himself. Either way, leaving him isn't really an actual possibility. He's giving you a way out, but it involves being just as coldblooded, murderous and cruel as he himself tends to be at his worst along with embracing every bad instinct he has as your own. Effectively, to break up with Barnes you need to kill Barnes...and to kill Barnes you need to become like Barnes. He knows and understands it and is goading you into it like a trial of fire. If you're not capable of going down that extreme route you'll never be rid of him.

[dee-in-the-box]

thinking.

thinking about Dave and his thoughts on Jack pre-Everything (in my headcanons, obviously)

like, the way i view Jack pre-Dee's Murder is that he's still rather blunt and rude, but he could still be rather sweet to others when he wanted. like the whole "kind, but not nice" type of thing.

(also, note that Dave mentioned, while talking to Dee, that he was never fine with Henry murdering her, and that he even tried to talk Henry out of doing it. there's also a Henry Tape where Dave sounds like he regrets what had happened to Dee, mentioning to Henry that he "knew this was a bad idea," and even sounding like he doesn't agree with them framing Jack for the crime. all in all, it's one of the few times we get to hear Dave go "Henry, I don't like what we're doing, and I don't feel comfortable helping you with this." so me writing Dave in this to regret Dee's murder and be generally uncomfortable with what's happening is not technically out of character.)

(this also turned into a bit of a fic whoops-)

thinking about Dave deciding to talk to Jack because...well, he seems kind of approachable. if a little...blunt at times.

he didn't hesitate to talk to Dave about whatever while he worked on animatronics. sometimes it was just complaints about his coworkers from other jobs, sometimes it was his past.

but a lot of the time it was about his siblings. he spoke rather highly of them, especially his sister.

Jack was oddly concerned about him, and the sheer number of scars that littered his body. he was nice to Dave, treated him like an actual human and not a freak (Jack would "jokingly" laugh it off when Dave would bring it up, saying something along the lines of "Well, I mean, a lot of people consider me to be a bit of a freak too, so I guess I understand a bit, man." Dave tries to ignore the sadness in his eyes as he says that, about how it's clear that Jack's had that particular insult slung at him more than once himself, albeit for...different reasons than Dave).

Dave will admit...maybe he got a bit infatuated.

Jack certainly didn't hesitate to let people know what he thought, that was for sure. as Dave had noted early on, he was blunt. he didn't even have much restraint with Henry, his boss. sure, he never said anything that would get him fired, but there were times where you could've convinced Dave that he stepped right up to that line.

sure, Dave could understand a bit why Henry might not have been particularly fond of Jack.

it was when Henry brought up killing Dee that Dave had tried putting his foot down a bit. he tried bringing up every excuse in the book (besides legality, because Henry clearly didn't care about that at this point) to keep Henry from doing it: they wouldn't have a place to hide the third body, Dave was worried about getting cold feet (definitely not because he'd grown close to Jack. definitely not), but, most of all, because it was likely going to piss Jack the FUCK off.

(it had come up during a conversation one afternoon.

"So, Old Sport...you said you were willing to die for your sister once-"

"Oh, fuck yeah, I'd give my life for her's in a heartbeat, Will."

"And...what if someone ever tried to hurt her, like seriously hurt her-?"

He didn't even hesitate.

"I'd tear them limb from limb where they stand.")

Dave had hoped that Henry would've dropped it by the next day.

he definitely didn't.

(Dave had to restrain her while Henry tried killing her. it took a while, given that she kept kicking right at Henry's arms, scratching and biting him. she didn't go down easy, that was for certain.

Dave kept telling Henry not to do this, that he couldn't do this. can't they just threaten her not to say anything? they don't have to kill her. c'mon Henry, please-)

they took her scarf. Jack said that their mom had made it for her before she and their father died. even Dave felt a little bad about that.

Jack came back that evening, and he started looking around for her. Dave couldn't help but feel pure guilt over what had happened. he had to console Jack as he ran around the restaurant, screaming for his sister, saying things like "C'mon Dee, this isn't funny! Come out, Kiddo!" and "Dee? Dee?! Where are you, please!" he had to console Jack during a breakdown where the only words Jack was able to get out through his sobs were "Peter's gonna fucking kill me." he couldn't help but feel shame, remorse as he was practically forced to lie to Jack's face, saying "We'll find her, I'm sure she's alright."

they sent Jack home for a few days, just to process his grief. Dave continued to do his job. it felt like his guilt was eating him alive over those few days.

(he feels eyes on him. he hears whispers. he notices the animatronics getting aggressive. things are moving around.)

Jack comes back, eye bags darker, his eyes still red from crying, but with a determined look on his face. he's rather short with Henry, clearly suspicious of him, but he goes off to do his job.

Dave never sees him...alive after that.

Henry acts weird after that. the hauntings get worse.

after a few days, he decides to finally confront Henry about everything. to try and put his foot down once more.

it doesn't work. but he does learn a few more things.

Henry's building a vessel for Dee. and Jack is dead.

they're framing him for murder.

Dave tries to protest; this isn't what he wants!

Henry shushes him again.

"You wanted this."

Dave goes back to talk with the cops. he still doesn't like this.

Henry promises to show him what happened to Jack later that night.

and when the restaurant closes that evening, Henry tries to take him back to show him after they waited for a bit in the office to make sure that Fredbear and Springbonnie wouldn't move too much and potentially kill one of them. they did hear some movement, but it didn't last long. Henry tries to take him to the Saferoom to show him Jack's resting place.

the suit's empty.

Dave doesn't think he's ever seen Henry legitimately scared before. they both head out into the dining room, where they discover something they failed to notice earlier, and probably the source of the noise.

a trail of blood across the tile floor, leading to the door, where the trail turns into footprints.

it doesn't seem like Jack's dead anymore.

Dave doesn't remember much after that, just that he must've taken a nap or something and woken up sometime around 5:30 in the morning.

(why does his head hurt?)

Henry seems annoyed, taking Dave outside to look at something.

Henry's car has been scratched by someone, the word "LIAR" scratched into the door, and the windshield smashed. it was Jack, it had to be.

Henry had apparently also caught Dee, and put the Puppet on strings. something of which really seemed to piss her off.

(that thing kept staring right into his soul, almost shaking in rage at the sight of him. he keeps his distance)

Peter sued them at one point, and also won. Dave doesn't like thinking about it much, it brings The Guilt back up.

over the years, he felt his mind get more and more scrambled. he felt less remorse, and...even a little bit of his memories got screwed up.

he didn't recognize the name "Jack Kennedy" anymore (oh, but Jack can sure recognize him).

at some point, Henry either vanished or died, Dave's not sure which, and he was left alone again.

but...it wouldn't be for long.

(Colorado. Dave heard the Saferoom door open, and he turned to see...an orange man, no, a zombie.

he can help Dave with his plan!

"Hello there, Old Sport!"

in that moment, for a reason Dave can't understand, the new employee looks at him with a look that can only be described as a mix of annoyance, mild fear, and...pity.

...wait.

why does he look so...familiar?

has Dave met him before?)

[invisiblegarters]

Only Friends Ranking - Ep 4

Genuinely had to sit and think on this for a bit and watch certain parts of the ep again (oh what a burden) and ponder my own reactions a little. I fucking love this show.

But I want to add a little disclaimer, since I guess it's needed: these opinions are subjective. I'm not objectively sitting here ranking the messiness I'm subjectively ranking how much the messiness (or lack thereof, for now) entertains me personally. It's not a statement of fact over which character is the "villain" or the "good guy" because frankly, I don't think we have any of either (maybe in their own heads, but not in the show itself).

Okay. That out of the way let's do this.

Character Rankings (Fave to Least Fave atm)

Sand. Yep he's back on top, it felt weird to demote him last week but he was much less boring this ep. I think I'm starting to get a better read on him, which I didn't have before, and I'm enjoying what I see. While I would like him to be much more guarded against Ray in particular, I think he's just too forthright. Not just with other people but also with himself. And I wonder how much of that stems from his situation. Back before ep 1 First said that Sand doesn't have time, he is patient, he has to do a lot of things just to make ends meet, and I think that extends to his personal life as well. He knows Ray's a bad idea and he also knows he's gonna walk right into it, and I am tentatively hopeful that this is what will make him come out okayish in the end. Because at the end of the day he still isn't gonna have time for bullshit, either other people's or his own. I feel like Ray's gonna fuck that up a bit (or a lot) for a while, but in the end he'll reset to form, probably a little more jaded but altogether still fairly whole. I think that's about all we can ask for him.

I hope that the ex shows up for real. Flashbacks are fun but I want a little bit of mess and it seems clear to me that Sand still has unresolved feelings there, maybe Top too. I am also more sure than ever that he has some serious anger issues and I think we might get to see the Return of the Bat, and I for one am so very here for it. He still seems the most put together out of all of them which is a little disappointing, but again, I do wonder how much of that is because he doesn't have the time to give into the hot mess he really is. I'm very very curious to see how his relationships with both Nick and Ray affect that moving forward, because it seems like regardless of what went down with Top and the ex that better be Mix or I will revolt, he tends to keep himself fairly restrained, and those two are so openly messy and so very unrestrained that you can practically feel the car crash coming (hopefully not in the literal sense).

Also people need to stop calling him a green flag like yesterday. He is not. He's just better at compartmentalizing, give him two episodes I feel it in my bones he's gonna turn out to be a messy messy bitch.

Mew. Never let it be said that I can't admit that I was wrong. I still think that Mew is manipulative but I no longer believe that he is specifically keeping Ray on the line. Ray is keeping himself on the line, every time Mew tries to yank him off he just bites in harder. Which means it's really gonna sting in so many different ways when Mew eventually decides fuck it and does what Ray's been begging him for for two years, because I'm not sure the feeling will be there then either. But I still expect it - frankly the real surprise for me would be if Mew and Ray end the show without fucking. And while I guess it's still possible that they did sleep together two years ago in the current timeline Mew has put a firm "no" down - at least for now. And I have to respect him for it.

Kinda wish he'd stop talking Sand up to Ray though. For one, the more he pushes Sand at him the less likely Ray will actually develop organic feelings for him. For two, he needs to back away from Ray's love life wholesale until Ray no longer wants him to be intimately involved in it. It's just smarter, although I can understand why Mew might think differently.

Then again if he wants to keep noticing how lovely Sand is (he is Mew, good taste no notes) he can go right on, because I wasn't kidding when I said I was shipping this. Maybe instead of Ray Mew should have Sand be his ill-advised hookup after things with Top blow up. I for one would not say nay.

I genuinely thought I'd be annoyed if Mew were not some sort of mastermind, but I'm not. At all. That said, I still don't think he's half as innocent as the show wants us to believe. And I still feel like he's playing with Top. Oh, Top is playing back, a little, but there's something about the way he looks sometimes and the things he says ("I don't want to hide anything from you / I need you to be honest with me") that makes me feel like he's still got more going on than we're seeing. Also he has to know that Top's not gonna stop doing drugs if he sexes him up. There was something about that whole interaction that struck me as weird. I can't put my finger on it right now but it's one of the things that I am going to be chewing on in the days to come, I can already tell.

Ray. This one was a surprise, and I want to be clear. I do not like this guy, and yes, a lot of that stems from the fact that he's set up to hurt my fave, but also he's a wrecking ball in human form and the worst thing about him is that he is an aimless one. Boston is a wrecking ball too but he's pointing himself in one direction; Ray just swings wildly in every direction because he himself is aimless, he doesn't know who he is or what he wants and that is dangerous, especially when you add in his substance abuse and his struggles with depression (look I don't like armchair psychoanalyzing but yeah, depression is what I am going to call it). He feels worthless and hopeless, he hates himself, and the problem with that is that no one else will ever be enough. He will turn his hatred against anyone who cares for him because he hates himself so much that he truly does not understand how anyone else could like him, and the self-hate turns into a weird derision for anyone who tries to see past the shell.

Mew is only exempt from this, I think, because he doesn't want Ray in the way Ray so desperately wants to be wanted. He loves him, he cares for him and tries to build him up, but he is not in love, he can and will step away if Ray is becoming too much, he will set boundaries and stick to them. So Ray's ire can't fall on him because he's reinforcing all the things Ray thinks about himself: that he's a burden, that he's too much, that he drives people away, that he's so unlovable even his own mother couldn't love him.

Sand, however. Sand is gonna fall right into the trap that Ray is laying for him, and oh boy is Ray gonna make him pay for it.

I was surprised by how much he seems to have held on to all the mean things Sand's called him, though. Not that he held on to them as further proof of who he is but that it was Sand specifically that was calling him those things. That was interesting and unexpected.

I do not think that Ray genuinely cares about either Mew or Sand as people at this juncture, but I also don't think that it's on purpose. He's a drowning man grasping at any and everyone within reach who is treading water, and he can't look past his own panic at not being able to get enough air to understand or care if he's dragging others down with him.

So yes. I do not like him but I find him utterly fascinating and Khaotung is killing it. That bathtub scene was amazing and painful (and yes I'm still feeling smug for calling it, mostly because I made a bet with my friend and now they owe me fic. Man do I love profiting off of being right. It's like Christmas AND my birthday) and finally made me understand why he clings to Mew so hard, and why he will keep clinging in spite of everything that happened this ep, in spite of having someone else who wants to care for him the way Mew won't, in spite of probably trying to think of something (or someone) else.

But the sad, sad truth that Ray will have to face (maybe not in this show but eventually, as a character) is that it's no one else's job to fulfill him, and they can't anyway. He's gotta learn to love himself before he can really love anyone else, or let them love him. I can't get over the idea that at some point he's gonna have to break his own heart to figure that out.

Nick. He gets this spot just for the way he smiled at Top like "bitch I know Boston's the worst, do you really think I'm not?" I knew he wasn't gonna go to Mew with the sex recording though because he wants Boston and breaking Top and Mew up at this point is counterproductive to his goals. Still think that he should blackmail Boston into a real relationship though. Opportunity wasted. Also he's making me very wary of wanting to take my phone into IT if I ever break it, lol. Because you know Boston didn't give him his passcode.

I'm also curious why he went for Top because he has to know it was Boston pushing things this whole time.

Boston. He went from winning last ep to being kind of pathetic this ep. The elevator scene in particular. I was embarrassed for him. Don't tell me that he really thought that Top would just give up and start fucking him on the regular after one night? Come on. Top's pettier than that, my dude. He's gonna make you feel like a pathetic loser for it as well as renew his efforts with Mew just to prove that he can do everyone one better.

I have to admit I am curious what makes him pull the "I want to try settling into something" thing with Nick next ep. Does he suspect that Nick knows more than he's saying? Does Top outright tell him he does?

I am also looking forward to him or NIck causing some havoc with Ray and Sand. One of them is gonna spill the RayMew beans, right? Boston would do it out of pure nastiness, but Nick I think values Sand as a friend and would do it as a warning. Or maybe he's like Boston and will hold onto it for when Sand pisses him off...

Top. Frankly unless we find out that Boston has further evidence of Ray and Mew actually fucking or at least showed him some sort of manipulated vid, I think he's a complete dumbass. You don't get to police who the guy you're with now kissed before he even knew you existed (or did he? 👀👀👀). Literally the only reason I was on his side was that if they fucked it was less about the fucking and more about the deliberate dishonesty, but let's be real, even that is a little sketch. Especially when you yourself don't know how many people you've slept with.

However I also kind of want to be weirdly charitable and say that maybe it has less to do with being pettily annoyed that Mew *dared* to have some sort of non-platonic contact with someone else before him and more being blindsided by how much the idea of Mew playing with him hurt. Whether that's because players hate being played or because he has genuine feeling for Mew I'm on the fence about.

But I still think Boston showed him sex. Because he was very insistent about that point. Whether it was RayMew sex or something else I do believe there was something. And I wanted to look at that scene again to see what Mew's face does when he replies but youtube at this point youtube told me to go f myself so no dice.

Also I think we all called the addiction problems. Dude's a mess. And he's not going to stop being a mess for sex.

Relationships (most to least fave atm)

This time I'm not just going to include romantic relationships because finally we're seeing some real meat out of the other interactions.

BostonNIck. Genuinely I think these two of the best chance of actually working out right now, very much in a "they deserve each other" way. Neither one of them knows what boundaries are and they're both obsessive af. If they turn that on each other they're doing society a favor, lol.

SandTop. You know what I would love? If Top was actually into Sand and deliberately lured his ex away to make him available. Of course that's not where we're going but that's why fanfiction exists. But weirdly I do think that Sand hates Top more than Top hates him - maybe he feels remorse for stealing his ex. Maybe they were friendly before he did that. I don't know. I do know that I want them to make out about it and I will never stop. You hear me? I will. Never. Stop.

SandNick. These two are gonna be fun. You can just tell by the way that Sand didn't even bat an eye when Nick was like hey listen to this audio recording I got when I bugged my FWB's car.

TopMew. Both still playing games. The balance of power between these two fascinates me because it seems to switch back and forth at will. I still feel like neither of them is *really* feeling much but I wonder if and when that will change.

MewRay. It's the only thing I can't make myself ship, but I thought that their whole dynamic was super interesting this ep. I can understand Mew trying to build Ray up, especially as he seems to be the only one who is privy to how deep Ray's issues go, and I can also understand Ray latching on to him hard because of that. When he kissed Mew while Mew was trying to sleep I recoiled from my screen so hard it physically hurt, lol. I do not know if that was the intention but it's what happened. Ideally I'd love it if they came out of this mess stronger friends but not sleeping together or paired romantically, but I don't have the highest hopes for it.

SandRay. I'm gonna be frank. Ray doesn't need a boyfriend. He needs a therapist and possibly a stint in rehab. Sand's gonna bash himself on this one like a bird against glass and it's gonna hurt him a lot. They're gonna flare hot and bright and burn to ash, but maybe, just maybe, they'll be able to emerge from the ashes as friends. It isn't lost on me that they do genuinely seem to get on even when they're not preluding to sex. For me this really depends on how fast it falls apart. If they've split by ep 9 I can really see a friendship emerging from this, but if not...nope.

Franky this one worries me. Because Ray latches on and it would be very easy for him to become far too dependent on Sand far too fast, and that's the last thing that either of them needs. Whether they fall in love or not (and I still think Sand will and Ray probably will not) is immaterial. If Sand (because for better or worse it's gonna have to be Sand) doesn't catch on fast enough to what Ray's doing with him it's gonna spell trouble, even without any interference from an outside party or even counting in Ray's continued feelings for Mew.

Sand clearly wants to be with Ray as equals, whether their relationship remains just friends or something else. And Ray is incapable of fulfilling that wish as he is.

SandMew. New ship alert! They should make out. The only reason it gets lowest billing is that it's a pipe dream comprised of one line from Mew and the fact that they both would be very good at communicating their needs with each other, at least from what we've seen thus far.

[kiigan]

ㅤ«I think we should decide for ourselves.» It was as simple and as complicated as that. «Very rarely two people will agree on exactly everything. From small matters, such as what is the most flavorful tea, to big matters, such as who should rule a village and why and how. Disagreeing, by itself, is not inherently bad - on the contrary, it's important to know how to listen to different perspectives rather than to remain in an echo chamber. Even if, in the end, we still disagree, we can coexist peacefully if we know how to respect the other. The problem is-»

ㅤA brief pause, to glance at Kakuzu and then back to the road ahead, «Most people don't know how to make an informed decision. Which, in turn, is often fueled by those in power - uneducated masses are much easier to manipulate and to control through means such as fear-mongering. If the people are unsure on what to decide, or how to decide, they are much more prone to allow others to decide for them and relieve them from the burden of responsibility. And another problem is that most people are often taught to do what is so-called right in order to avoid some form of punishment, not because they intrinsically relate to certain values. Think of stealing, for example. If I do not steal simply because I do not wish to be arrested, all this will result in is that I will refrain from stealing during times I know there is a high risk I'll be caught in the act, but nothing will prevent me from stealing when I feel at ease to do so. On the other hand, if I understand that I should not steal because that is unfair towards the person who worked hard to achieve whatever it is that I might steal, then I will not do it regardless of if I'm being monitored or not.»

ㅤAnd maybe this whole spiel could be shrunk into one single concept: empathy. Put yourself in somebody else's shoes, so to speak; take the time to consider what your actions and choices will cause to that person. And, from there, compassion. Be sensitive to another's suffering, and have the motivation to want to help them.

ㅤ«I also agree that respect should be given to all, by default. And then either continued or taken back, according to what that specific person offers you.» In a way, maybe this explained why Kakuzu, so infamous for having butchered several partners before and not having yet done the same to Hidan only because the zealot literally could not be killed, had yet to raise a finger towards Itachi? Because he'd been offered respect by default? It truly wasn't rocket science, at the end of the day. Speaking of Hidan-

ㅤThe large hand came to pat his head, fluffing down the strands of deep black, and it took the Uchiha every ounce of self-restrain to not just freeze on the spot and, instead, continue walking in the same tranquil cadence, like nothing at all was amiss. When was the last time somebody had patted his head...? Hell, when was the last time somebody at all had touched him [or attempted to; a certain red-haired puppet master came to mind] in a way that did not immediately warrant a defensive reaction? There was Kisame, yes, and occasional little playful shoulder bumps and careful touches when tending wounds and even sitting close together for warmth during cold nights in the open, but that didn't really count. Kisame was someone Itachi had no doubt at this point that he could trust. From someone who effectively was a stranger, though, like Kakuzu? It felt as unsettling as it did comforting, and he found himself missing the contact as soon as it was gone. Who would have guessed that even a genius was not exempt from touch starvation.

Alas, there was a mask to be kept on.

ㅤ«My reason was never a mystery. I wished to test the limits of my powers at the time, and there was no better standard than to overcome what used to be Konoha's most powerful clan.»

      Kakuzu could not help but to see the similarities and yet striking differences between his younger self and the young Uchiha that stood next to him. As a young man, he had been devout, perhaps more so than Hidan, a man of faith only lead away from it to serve his country and village, to which he was even more faithful to. Despite all that faith and trust into the authorities at the time, he could also see what was wrong with the system. The injustice done both by the deities he worshiped and the government that should stand for him. Still, his faith had blinded him, much in the way perhaps Itachi's strong ideals blurred his sight. For Kakuzu, it had all ended with him being brutalised by the Shodaime, the very man that created the village in which Itachi had grown up in.

      ❛  Indeed,  ❜ Kakuzu agreed, though it was hard to truly conceptualise what would classify as right, wasn't it? Who was to decide such thing? Kakuzu used to wonder quite often the intricacies of morality, of right and wrong, many times questioning the monks at the temple he frequented for surely they'd have the answer. They did not, or perhaps they simply did not wish to tell him.  ❛  Although, who do you think should get to decide which is which?  ❜ he asked, unaware that Itachi had similar thoughts.

      ❛  Many like to say there is no light without the dark, perhaps the very same can be said for things such as 'right' and 'wrong'.  ❜ The miser shrugged, much of it was all very subjective to one's experiences and desires. Someone as Itachi, who desired peace, would see any action that opposed to that as wrong and any in favor of it as right, but what of the countless people who had died between the wars to bring about the very age of seemingly peace they walked on. The little villages trampled by bigger ones in their avid search for peace. Would they see it their own dead and think it was a good thing?

      Now, that, Kakuzu could agree with wholeheartedly. Authority in their world, in general too, but specially in the shinobi world was done to benefit those who did not have the general well-being of all in mind. An allegory, a title more than a hard-earned honor.  ❛  Respect should be given to all, regardless of age or status, or so I was taught,  ❜ he began, green and red eyes once again staring at the younger man.  ❛  Authority, however, should only belong to those who strive to earn it, who have earned the trust and collective respect of those they seek to oversee.  ❜ Which, in a way, was why Kakuzu put his faith on money so strongly.

      People work hard to earn their money, they are less willing to betray or perhaps less willing to 'play' when money is at stake.

      Itachi's next words prompt a low chuckle of the older man, eyes glinting with amusement at the saying.  ❛  Hardly. The dead are dead. It seems more like peer pressure by the living who remember, and are using the dead and the grief they left behind as leverage over the living.  ❜

      Kakuzu caught the small joke, though he did not laugh at it. He was not one to assume, but sharing that particular conversation with Itachi showed him there was more to the young Uchiha than met the eyes, although he wouldn't call him out on it.  ❛  Perhaps, but family is hardly only made of those who share your blood,  ❜ he paused, and hesitantly approached the younger man, hand gently patting his head. Kakuzu was not one for physical contact, but Itachi was but a toddler compared to him, it felt like he might have needed it somehow.  ❛  Besides, I don't believe you killed your family without having a logical reason to. You don't strike me as someone to do so. You're not Hidan.  ❜

[rottingformerfirstmate]

Ed and his body don't entirely get along.

He has come to accept this over the countless years at sea, and accepts that some things will simply be as they are; his knee will twinge in the rain and may twist from its place without his brace, and his body will bleed from time to time to release whatever past remnants of childhood remain, and his head will hurt when the ocean roars too loudly, and his vision will darken from standing too quick when he's been tired lately. His body is like the vast ocean in that way- uncontrollable, but yet predictable when one knows the signs.

He doesn't know the signs that could have possibly indicated this. Hopefully he doesn't have to learn them. It all happens so quickly that he looks down at his body to ensure he hasn't been run through the chest, as that's the first and only explanation that crosses his mind when it begins to feel like he's breathing, but not getting any air. Ed flattens a palm against his chest. He can feel his heartbeat against it. He takes a step back away from the railing, just because every sailor knows to get away from the edge of the ship when feeling unwell, but the slight movement sends his vision spinning.

"Captain? Captain, can you hear me?"

The words sound like they're coming from underwater, and the face in front of him is blurry. He'd guess Frenchie by virtue of the voice and the black smudge of curls, but he's too busy trying to regain control of his breathing to be certain. Someone's hand touches his arm and he smacks it away so quickly that it feels like he's barely moved. The whole world has tilted on its axis, leaving only him struggling to reorient himself on a new plane.

He looks back out at the ocean he'd been watching mere moments ago, and it gets worse. He thinks about the shrinking dots of the marooned crew and swears he can see them still if he squints, nevermind that he'd been eating breakfast with them all a couple hours ago. They're safe now, safe from Ed's darkest moments and back on board, but some part of him knows they're dying at his hand. He told Stede he didn't kill, that it was all given to his crew, but he also mentioned the technicalities. If they died there, it would've been starvation or dehydration or heat stroke, sure, but it also would have been Ed.

"Come on, now, sir, you have to breathe, right? All that gasping isn't helping- can someone find Captain? Stede, I mean. Or Izzy, maybe?"

It's Izzy who gets there in a heartbeat, a fact that doesn't surprise Ed. That's the way it's always been. He feels Izzy's hand in his arm, never his face, and focuses on the harsh rasp of his voice.

"Stay with us, Edward. What's happened?"

"I d-don't know," he manages. "Can't- can't breathe, Iz."

"Oh dear."

That's another voice, and Ed can pick Stede's out of the most booming crowds. Stede and Izzy are here. Both of them. Between the two of them, they won't let him die, he reasons, even if he ought to be executed for all that he's done. Ed presses his palms against his face to hide it, hide the tears that have come from nowhere, hide the darkness that's brewing inside him, hide what he really is.

"Frenchie, have Roach put on some tea, if you don't mind. We'll take it in our quarters."

It's Stede's hands that curl around Ed's wrists. He knows them just as well as his voice. Still, they're holding him, restraining him, and Ed can't fight the panic that rises between being trapped and being unable to breathe. He tries to pull away from the touch but finds his motions foiled instead.

"Izzy, love, help me-" then he's being grabbed by each arm, two hands on each bicep, and there's no way that Ed is not being executed right now. He struggles to get free, but between the dimming edges of his vision and the firmness of his imprisonment he doesn't succeed in even getting one side free. "It's okay, Ed, come on. Let's just get you back to bed. How does that sound?"

Before he can work his mouth around an answer, the mattress is soft beneath his thighs and Izzy is lifting his calves up into the bed while a blurry figure that must be Stede lingers in the doorway, talking to someone outside of it. This is a trap. Izzy and Stede have betrayed him, but he's fairly confident they wouldn't, but there's no other explanation, but Stede is pushing a teacup into his hands, but, but, but- he sucks in a deep breath that burns the whole way through his lungs and sobs at the warm porcelain cup clutched in his shaking left hand.

"That's it, darling, breathe. Take a sip, nice and slow- perfect."

"Are you alright, Captain?"

A gloved hand touches Ed's jaw and he jerks away from it, spilling the hot tea but barely registering the way it burns his skin. He hadn't realized he had started to breathe better until the privilege is taken from him once more. The teacup falls to the ground and shatters. A bare palm reaches out once more, soft and barely calloused, the hand of a man who has done no hard work in his lifetime, but it still sears into the sensitive skin of Ed's forearm. Never before has he been so certain of death's embrace. He just wishes it would come quicker.

"-like Alma. It's a panic attack, and if we just-"

Before the sentence finishes, long before Ed can make sense of the fragment he's caught, a familiar backhand whips his face to the side. He tastes blood in his split lip as he looks up slowly. There will be a mark, he thinks, as he stares at his first mate.

"Stede said you were panicking," Izzy explains. "Hard to reason you back into breathing if you're panicking."

Ed works his jaw for a moment before giving up and popping it back into place with his hands. It's not the first hit he's taken to do that kind of damage, and Ed has found it's taken less over the years. This is another thing his body will do that he will cope with, just the same as all the others. He does feel a little more clear-headed with the pain, though. Ed has always understood how easily this soothes Izzy, even if it's not quite as effective for him.

"I don't agree with your methods, but he does appear to be breathing a tad better," Stede sniffs at Izzy.

All the same, they sit on either side of him. Stede slings an arm around Ed's shoulders, hand resting lightly on his right upper arm, while Izzy's fingers curl around the left side of his waist. He feels secure, but not trapped, he realizes, and takes a slow, deliberate deep breath.

[cinnamonest]

Zhongli (Genshin Impact) - Yandere Profile

This man's voice has a POWER over me I SWEAR

tws: yandere, mentions of n/sfw

tws (under the cut): very ddlg-esque vibes, sorta? infantilization, noncon

I'm sorry I get such strong daddy vibes it unintentionally went in this direction, hope that isn't too bad lmao

I’m working on all the prompts I’ve gotten in! I’ve gotten a few so I’ll be working on those.

----------

What are they generally like? Lucid, aware? Obsessive? How do they behave?

He's one that might be likely to misunderstand his feelings at first, think that he sees himself as a mentor or maybe even an authority figure, someone to guide you and teach you and serve as a dependable partner to your travels. As time goes on, and he begins to recognize how utterly flustered he gets around you, he's forced to acknowledge the actual feelings he has.

While some yanderes with a slight aloofness or pride to them get worse when in love, such as Childe or Kaeya, his drops completely. You bring out a softer side of him, really, one that's protective and tender and loving, so very loving, wanting to be around you, with you. He's certainly an obsessive, protective type, ultimately allowing his protective nature to get the better of him as he demands to know everything you've done, account for your location at every moment, constantly keep track of your habits, inquire about very personal details of your life. If he realizes you're bothered by it, he might draw back a bit, but he's convinced that that's just your perception, that it's necessary, truly, and not at all unusual.

Pet names. Particularly fond of love, darling, and angel. Sweet things that represent what you mean to him -- something precious, something to represent his adoration and idolization.

The primary form of delusion comes from a perception of you. He's obsessive, and idolizes you to an extent. He perceives you as pure, innocent, angelic. The thing is, this applies regardless of whether or not you actually are. If you are, it will solidify the idea, but even if you're not, he will find a way to see you so, anyway. No matter how wise you are, no, you're naive. No matter how capable you are, no, you're weak and fragile. No matter how experienced you may be, no, you're pure. He can always keep this delusion running by bringing into account age and comparison - you'll never be as strong as him, so you might as well be frail and weak. You'll never have lived as long as him, so really, do you think there's that much difference between you and a child, when compared to someone like himself?

How likely are they to kidnap their darling? How quickly will they do so?

Actually highly likely, and pretty quickly. As he observes you, it becomes very clear to him how very fragile you are, how naive you are, you are quite literally too pure, too angelic, to be living in this world with such beings as humans. Fragile, beautiful little things have a place where they belong - protected. Where do we put fragile, beautiful things? We put them behind glass, behind ropes, in pretty cages, in secluded rooms. It's only natural that you, too, need a similar environment.

He's one of the ones that will... Elegantly kidnap you, as odd as it sounds. He's not a brute that would do something horrendous like knocking you out or drugging you, no, he'll find an excuse for you to come to his abode, invite you in, and you'll walk in none the wiser. Only after your in, and the doors close, does he guide you to your new room, calmly explaining that he's come to the realization that you're too fragile to continue your journey, and ought to simply give up on your travels. He knows you'll be upset at first. Like a child being denied, you'll get pouty, moody, you might cry, you might lash out at him. It's predictable. He'll dry your eyes and calm you down, brushing off any harsh words you may have, holding your wrists in his hands when you try to push him away, softly reassuring you that it will all be alright, that you're safe now, and you'll learn to accept this with time.

How difficult is it to escape from them? How do they keep you restrained? How do they deal with attempted escape? 

He would want something... elaborate. He's a man with taste for the most beautiful of things, including yourself, and he won't settle for something as simple as a chain or ropes. No, that would be too simple and brutish, and you, one of the finest things in his life, deserve something equally beautiful and delicate.

He's one of the ones that would go to a great deal of preparation for your arrival. He'd have a room prepared just for you, very ornate, beautifully tailored to you -- the walls your favorite color, the bed made of the same material as your old one, and the whole room completely filled with things you're certain you never even told him you liked. Clothes that fit perfectly to your body. It's frightening how perfect it is, because you know he had to go out of his way to acquire the information to achieve such perfection, but you have no idea how.

Everything about it elegant and detailed, right down to the series of ornate locks on the door. They're some of the sturdiest available, made with essentially unbreakable metal alloys and the most intricate lock systems to date. The windows don't open, and he'd certainly find some way to ensure escape through them isn't an option -- perhaps metal bars, perhaps an unbreakable glass substitute, perhaps merely locating your new home right on the edge of one of Liyue's most beautiful mountains, so that if you were to go out the window you'd plummet to the earth below. He's a bit delusional, but he's not stupid, and he will think through every possibility. Every little detail he needs to keep you safe and confined.

He's certain that, perfect as it is, this room is all you will ever need to be happy. Should you desire anything else, he can bring it to you. You'll never have to leave.

So it goes without saying that it would be exceptionally difficult to escape him. You'd have to find a way through the locks, for which your best bet would be to get some hair pins or tiny writing utensils. Even if you managed it, though, which would frankly be a very difficult feat, you'll have to deal with staying free. Zhongli has ties to the people of Liyue as a whole, and needless to say, he has eyes everywhere. You can't risk appearing in the harbor area, there will be far too many people who would immediately report you, and you'd just be walking right to him anyhow. The surrounding areas also have ties to him, so you'd want to try and reach Mondstadt, as far as it is, which is a difficult travel by foot all alone. You won't get far. He's faster, he's wiser, and he will find you long before you could ever hope to make it there.

However, he's not quite as angry as some yanderes would be about it. He doesn't take your escape personally, no, he blames himself, only calculating his own mistakes as to how it happened. He sees you as something like... a little runaway pet, so naive and dull that you don't know any better than to go wandering off. Or perhaps like a child, just sheepishly curious and wanting to explore, not knowing the dangers of the world. Or, perhaps...

"I haven't been giving you enough attention, have I? That's why you pulled this little act of rebellion... you're hurt by my negligence and wanted to be reassured of my care for you. I'm so sorry... I understand now, love. This was my fault. I've been so caught up with work... I'll delegate some tasks to my workers, and I'll be able to spend more time with you from now on, alright? Don't worry, I'm not angry, I'll take full responsibility. I'll be sure to make it up to you... now, let's go home."

How easy are they to trick, deceive, or manipulate?

Much like Childe or Venti or anyone who has been around as long as he has, you really don't stand a chance. He's an incredibly perceptive man. There's not much to say on the matter, as any attempts will be quickly shut down.

He'd find it amusing, really. Like a child trying to lie, but the evidence is all over their face and hands - it's that obvious to him. It's cute enough that he almost hates having to discipline you for it, but, you have to learn.

How lenient are they? What privileges can you have, and what will you be denied?

He wants his little angel to be safe - and unfortunately, you, being so naive and empty headed, don't always know what's best for you. He knows rules can be hard to follow perfectly, but they're there to keep you safe.

Extremely strict, will want to monitor every moment of your life, every little movement you take, and will insist on watching over you in every task. He'll pick out everything you wear, everything you eat.

Occasionally, if you ask very sweetly, he may take you out for walks in Liyue. Honestly, he'd be lying if he said he didn't enjoy taking you to what he knows are the finest locations, shops with the highest level of craftsmanship, restaurants with a high price tag and reputable food. He enjoys showing off his refined tastes and discerning selective abilities. And honestly? There's a certain... Powerful feeling to knowing you're made aware of the costs when he makes high purchases in front of you... even if you don't realize he's not always actually the one paying for it, or that he forgot mora again but promises the owner to pay later - but he'll make sure you don't know that. You hear the numbers, and your eyebrows raise, your eyes widen. You'd nearly faint if that total was on your responsibility, and he knows that. Which is why he'll simply smile at you, and tell you you're worth every last Mora. He'll buy you nearly anything you may desire. It seems like leniency, but in reality, it's his subtle way of locking control and dependency over you, making you respect him, making you love him.

"Don't worry, love. It's not a lot... Not to me, at least. Even if it were, my angel only deserves the best, no?"

What kind of rules do they have? What kind of punishment would they use?

Oh dear. Again, he's very strict, and wants to monitor everything you do, every little aspect of your life. He decides what you eat, portioning your meals to make sure you're eating enough, he worries about you going hungry during your travels, but luckily you'll never have to worry about that again. If you have a sweet tooth, he'll sigh and worry about your teeth and health, but he'll make sure to account for a little bit of sugar in your day, and will even pick up little treats from some of the most reputable places in Liyue.

He picks out clothes for you with each day. They're not... Normal clothes, per se. Certainly not what you'd normally wear on your travels. And it's not like anyone will see you except him - which is exactly why you'll have clothes he would never want anyone else to see you in. Frilly, lacey things, somehow both highly sexualized but also incredibly infantile, soft pinks, baby blues, gentle off-whites. They accentuate the curves of your body so perfectly, while just barely letting him see the parts of you normally kept hidden.

You'll have a schedule - a bath time, a bedtime, a wake-up time. He's weak to your requests, though, and may let you stay up a little late every now and then, or sleep in just a bit, if you make that soft pouting face and beg. He'll insist on bathing you, dressing you, so that you don't have to - and can't even if you wanted to - lift a finger even to wash yourself or put your clothes on.

He has a set of rules for you, very simple ones he hopes you can easily follow. No trying to leave. No doing anything dangerous. No talking to strangers when you go out. You must hold his hand whenever you're walking together, don't go wandering off.

He'll feel ashamed of the thought for a while, but eventually he'll cave and give into the desire, no, the security precaution, of a nice little collar for you. It's not too embarrassing, no, he went out of his way to find one that was delicate, almost like a necklace, made with fine materials, the engraving only visible up close. If you look closely, though, it clearly bears his name.

Breaking the rules is expected, he anticipates it. You're not the brightest, he might even view it as a mistake. A benefit is that you can easily pass it off as simply forgotten, or an accident. Hence, he's not too harsh - normally. He'll sigh, forgive you, and pat your head, contemplating how to prevent your access in the future.

Perhaps you wriggled out of his hand and ran off while walking? You were just excited, distracted, like a child. He might be able to procure a small leash, one that wouldn't be immediately obvious or embarrassing, to attach to your collar. Perhaps some cuff-like links to latch your arm to his.

You forgot the rule about not handling the kitchen knives and cut yourself? He'll have to get some kind of lock and simply keep them safely away from you. No big deal. Any measures are worth your safety.

If you push the limits, or have a defiant attitude, he might reach the point of punishment. As for not-unwholesome things, this would usually include taking away privileges, such as walks or sweets, but overall, punishment will mostly come in more impure forms.

How do they deal with rivals, or perceived rivals? Will they get rid of them? Will they kill them themselves, or find another way?

Not too much to say here - he has connections. He doesn't need to dirty his own hands. For all his supposed humility, if he truly dislikes someone, they're no more significant than an insect to him. He has no reservations about ridding the world of people who, in his mind, are obviously trying to deceive you, abuse you, corrupt you.

Thankfully, he is very capable of keeping a neutral face, even when he feels laughter building up. It would probably look strange if he were smiling over the newest body to come into his parlor.

How easy is it to make them mad? What does their anger look like?

It's a slow buildup. He views restraint as a virtue, and looks down upon those who lack control over their own tempers. He's a man who strives to meet his own standards of character, and that very much applies to self control and ability to maintain a controlled demeanor, even when he feels a bit of frustration due to you being intentionally and deliberately defiant.

It's his responsibility to be a good role model for you and make sure you understand how to behave. However, in the end, he's very keen on properness and rules. If you have a tendency towards brattiness and pushing your limits, you may drive him to a boiling point.

However, even when expressing his anger, he's remarkably controlled. It's very mature, really. Nonetheless, he will have you shivering and tearful with his voice alone, booming with that depth that reverberates off the walls, that vibrates against your very core. His true anger is one that can strike fear even in the most courageous individuals - he's terrifying when he wants to be, fierce and intimidating, a sort of power just eminates from him.

Nonetheless, it's quick, he calms down very quickly, wipes the tears from your eyes, and sighs.

"I do hate having to be firm with you... but I can't have you thinking you can just act however you want. You understand that, don't you?"

So they see you as above them, beneath them, or equal to them?

Both? It's difficult to describe. You're an angel to him. You're the finest work of art, the most intricate creation, the kind of person whose body and likeness deserves to be preserved in art and tradition, one of those women who should be renowned for beauty even centuries long after you're gone from the earth. It's almost goddess-like. At the same time, there's a beautiful, tragic duality to your essence, he thinks. A fragility and a dependency that leaves you in need, but an inherent status of perfection that makes you deserve the utmost perfect of care. You need to be coddled, cared for, protected, but you deserve it. Like a deity incarnated into a mere fragile human form, a queen that needs support to retain her grace.

Unlike some, he doesn't view his care and protection as some kind of favor that should be repaid with your gratitude, no, really, he is grateful that he is the one who is even deserving of being your caretaker, your provider, your lover.

Even if he is the one who determined that he deserves that role.

How determined are they for you to love them? How hard will they try to make it happen? Or are they content just having you?

He's convinced that he can show you that he is your protector, your lover, that it's fate itself that has locked you together, not just his own will.

And he is, above all else, patient. One of the most patient you could encounter. You think a year is a long time? It's nothing to him. A century for you? More than a lifetime. For him? Nothing. He can and will wait, as long as it takes, and he will never falter in his continual care. He'll remind you frequently, he'll shower you in affection, but if you don't return it? It's not that bad. He has all the time in the world to fix you.

Bonus: Is there anything that makes them unique, in comparison to other yanderes?

Moraless Sugar daddy

But in all seriousness, he is definitely of the gift-giving love language. He sees beautiful things, and beautiful things make him think of you! It's sweet, he thinks. So many little things he sees throughout his day make him think of you, and he has to have all of them, see your face when he gives them to you. He likes making you happy, for one, but he'd be lying if he said there wasn't a sort of satisfactory pride he gets from the power dynamic of it all. He wants to be the sole source of provision in your life, he wants your dependency.

If we're talking prior to the events of the game, it will be even more extreme. He treats it like it's truly nothing, throwing around massive purchases, seemingly as if he's not thinking about it at all. But he is - rest assured, he's taking it into consideration, at least, that is, how it will affect your attitude and perception of him.

General perverseness: how sexual of a person are they? What’s their drive like? How touchy do they get? Do they have any reservations about sexuality?

On the reserved side. He'd never conduct himself improperly in public, of course. It's out of the question. He cares about proper behavior and public image, and he'd never behave in a vulgar manner.

Even in private, he's certainly one of the ones that struggles with a certain guilt. To some degree, he would feel like you're so innocent and pure that he doesn't want to corrupt you. He goes through stages. First, he'll lie to himself, telling himself that the feelings he has for you are simply protective, platonic, a natural sense of responsibility for you. That becomes more and more difficult to convince himself of, the more excited he becomes around you, the more he finds his eyes drawn to whatever bits of skin are exposed on your body, finding himself drifting off to impure thoughts, trying to push them away. 

Second, once he's forced to acknowledge the true nature of these feelings, he'll simply practice restraint, something he's rather good at in this area. He tries, he really does. He tells himself he can't do something so impure, that it would violate you, that he should be ashamed of himself for it. It becomes more and more and more difficult to restrain himself with time, the feelings rising and the thoughts become more difficult to push away, eventually entertaining the fantasies in his head in an attempt to rid himself of the urge in real life. It doesn't work, no, it only makes the urges worse, and he can't be around you without his body nearly commanding him to do something. And finally, he'll take a different stance entirely, telling himself that, no, it's not going to corrupt you, rather, it's taking care of you. If he really wants to love you, really wants to care for all of your needs, then surely that would include your physical needs, and therefore, really, it would be wrong of him not to help you.

As that shift in viewpoints goes on, he'll become more and more bold, hands lingering just a little longer, face coming just a little closer. It's a slow build of tension, just waiting to boil over. 

How forceful are they? Do they care about your willingness?

He understands you're nervous. Again, no matter how experienced you are, somehow in his head he makes it out to be insignificant. Even if you've had other relationships, he convinces himself - and tries to convince you - that they were inadequate, they didn't care about you, not like he does. And he'll treat it as that -- any resistance you put up is nervousness, nothing more, nothing less. He'll reassure you a million times that you won't feel pain, that he'll be gentle, that you'll feel good, even if his size and strength frankly is rather intimidating regardless of experience. He'll keep cooing in your ear, softly whispering reassurance, softly running hands over your skin, holding you in place as the last inch stretches you apart. 

What sort of kinks or fetishes do they have, or would they fill?

Infantilization

Again, no matter how smart, experienced, and capable you may be, you're none of those things to him. You're a fragile, little thing. He has to take care of you at all times. It may not be evident at first, and he himself likely doesn't fully realize it, but there is something highly sexual to this for him. Caring for you puts him in a position of dominance, control. It gives him access to your privacy, dressing you up, fingers running over your skin, bathing you, watching your skin glisten. He'll talk to you in this way, too, often softly, remarking every little way in which you need him, and even condescendingly so. He wants you to be his, not only in a sense of love, but of possession.

Oral

Primarily giving. Even on its own, he loves the taste, but the effect it has on you makes it that much better. He loves anything that forces you to depend on him entirely for pleasure, that puts you at his mercy. And he'll be torturous about it too, restraining your arms and legs so you can't control anything, hold your hips down so you can't roll into him, so that only he can determine exactly how much pressure and speed you get. And he won't rush it, no, he'll go so slowly it's torturous, and telling you very simply that if you want any more, you'll have to beg.

Edging

For a variety of reasons. The power trip is as exhilarating as it is pleasurable, but he also loves watching your body writhe. Each little muscle that moves under the flesh when your arms strain against his hand holding your wrists together, the convulsing of your stomach muscles, the way your toes curl and legs spasm and the sweet little whimpers you make when he draws back just short of your high. He's mastered watching your reactions, knowing exactly when to stop, even if you try to mask it. He'll want you to tell him, though, nonetheless, tell him when you're close, if for nothing else but the sense of you obeying his commands.

Collaring

Similarly to infantilization, it gives him something of a sense of control, of possession. He loves seeing his name engraved on it, marking the whole of your being with his ownership. In his somewhat rare moments of roughness, he'll want to pull on it, use it to draw you towards him, in a moment of your defiance, in particular. If you're being mouthy, whiny, disobedient, and you finally make him snap, especially if you try to walk away from him, he'll yank you back with force, pulling you close to him, and when the force of it shuts you up, changes your demeanor, forces you to acknowledge your submission - the satisfaction he'll get from that is incomparable.

How do they feel about pregnancy or babies? Do they want them?

As much as he likes the idea, to him, you're already like a child, naive and fragile. Could your body even handle a pregnancy, a birth? He'd likely try to avoid it, but in the end, if it happened by accident anyway, rest assured you'd be getting the best care of any woman to ever be pregnant in Teyvat, and he'd do everything in his power to ensure you were always comfortable, taking his caretaking to another level, almost never even letting you get up, insisting you stay still and calm and needy.

What kind of (nsfw) punishments would they use?

He'd be one to pull the "it doesn't hurt you as much as it does me" line, but really, even if he refuses to admit it to his own self, having you bent over his lap is just as much for his own enjoyment as it is a disciplinary measure. It's more humiliating than it is painful -- he'd hold back, afraid of hurting you with his strength, but taking in every little flinch and whimper you make as he brings his hand down on your ass, keeping your head pressed down, kneading at the flesh. He'd insist it's the most effective punishment measure, but you can feel the hard-on digging into your stomach. The worse the behavior, the worse the beating, but every time, after it's over, he'll hold you upright, wiping the tears from your eyes and asking you if you learned you lesson, if you intend to do it again, and smiling when you insist you won't.

What body parts of their darling do they like the most?

Your skin. It's beautiful, and he loves the way that light from the moon and sun look on your naked form. He loves the way your skin feels, soft and delicate, smooth, so paper thin and fragile, and so, so deliciously prone to showing marks from the slightest of harm - a simple smack can make the plump flesh darkened and reddened, the lightest suckling will leave beautiful hickeys all down your neck and chest. There are so many ways to mark his property, to stake a visible claim all over you, it's irresistible.

He also will go out of his way, when picking out all the things he wants you to wear, to find colors that best go with your skin tone, in a contrasting sense - particularly lacey, sheer things that contrast very well, so he can see your soft flesh perfectly defined against the little lace patterns.

[baka-writings]

𝑱𝒆𝒂𝒍𝒐𝒖𝒔 𝒔𝒆𝒙 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉: 𝑶𝑵𝑬𝑼𝑺

𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔: s m u t obviously, as the anon requested them to be a bit possessive then that's a warning too ig

I'm sorry this took me ages, I'm barely alive .. Hope you like it! Also everything in this is just my opinion so If you have a different opinion that's okay :)

Requests closed!

𝑹𝒂𝒗𝒏

okay honestly you do NOT want to make him jealous

the most possessive in the group, you can't change my mind

anyway

a jealous sex with Youngjo would be really intense, more than usual

he wants to have you only for himself and he wants you to only look at him

he'd still call you baby girl, baby, princess or whatever

but that doesn't mean he'd go easy on you

the opposite

if you don't obey, you should expect a punishment in a form of a very long night (i wish)

jealous Youngjo would be more rough than usual, not only his thrusts but also actions

he'd just like to see you cry while he's deep inside you

I feel like he'd get turned on if you cried

because that'd make him satisfied and would teach you a lesson

or maybe not

but you'd remember that night for a long time

possessive Youngjo would have his hand around your neck, while he'd whisper who you belong to

𝑺𝒆𝒐𝒉𝒐

oh boy

2nd most possessive

he'd be kinda similar to Youngjo

we know Seoho is a cutie, but could also make you forget your name real quick

that'd happen

okay tbh I don't think Seoho would get jealous easily and much

but when he's jealous he'd turn on hard dom mode

like he sees you talking to someone he doesn't want you to talk to for whatever reason

he'd sneak y'all to the nearest private place and fuck you right there

also foreplay? lol no, not happening

possessive Seoho would overstimulate the shit out of you, I kinda feel he'd enjoy seeing you cry from overstimulation

okay but unlike Youngjo, he'd feel kinda soft the next morning and would be a bit freaked out that he hurt you

would be the softest baby the next day

𝑳𝒆𝒆𝒅𝒐

okay hear me out

i don't see Geonhak too possessive or jealous

of course he'd get jealous if you gave him a reason to be

honestly i also think he'd first try to talk it out with you

but if it happened a few more times he'd snap

we all know he'd be scary when jealous

he'd want you on your knees right then and there

would fuck your mouth and make you gag a few times :)

oh well the rest would just be you being under his control

gentleman Geonhak? always, but forget it now

he'd hold your hands over your head with one of his hands

the other one would be holding your hips down while he fucks you ... a few times

i think this would teach you not to make him jealous next time

as for possessiveness, i don't think there would be any need for that tbh

he'd make you behave rq

𝑲𝒆𝒐𝒏𝒉𝒆𝒆

okay this boy

i don't think he'd be possessive nor jealous

i feel like he'd probably cry if he was jealous lmao

anyway if jealous sex happens

i don't think you'd be in much danger

but be ready for a semi-bratty Keonhee

he'd have some sarcastic comments at times as well

usually sex with him is not that intense, but this time his thrusts would be a lot deeper and rougher

but he'd still be caring after y'all done

if it's the first time he's been rougher with you he'd ask you if you're okay after y'all done

𝑯𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒘𝒐𝒐𝒏𝒈

okay i see woong as a switch, fight me

he's a freaky boy

and that's why i kinda see him having you tied up under his mercy

his hips don't lie nor does his pretty tongue

i think I'd rank him 3rd in terms of possessiveness tbh

but his possessive side would mostly be some whining followed by sarcastic comments

because i think he'd feel easily insecure

anyway jealous sex would be kinda sloppy and I'd say quick until he calms down

like i said before he'd have you tied up or restrained in any way

when he's calm he'd be satisfied with himself maybe get kinda shy but wouldn't admit it

𝑿𝒊𝒐𝒏

i think Dongju would be such a brat ngl

at first if he felt jealous i think he'd be a bit dramatic

so the sex wouldn't happen asap

he'd talk about it with you

in a dramatic manner ofc cuz yeah we know him

but after seeing you smirking at his jealousness

he'd bring our his soft dom self

soft dom cuz he doesn't want to hurt you, but also wants to show you that you belong to him

"having fun?"

he'd ask you unimpressed

i don't think he'd be that possessive tbh, only when you really piss him off or when you're trying to make him jealous on purpose

but other than that no possessiveness wouldn't happen

he'd want you on your knees ngl

would guide your head as you suck him off

he'd be giving you a silent treatment the whole time y'all gonna have sex

would only use body language

he'd be so bratty the whole time lmao

[brotherhoodoftheblade]

Ahhh, I love that! 😎💕

And yesss, I, too, headcanon that Percy dedicated a lot of his free time to art. <3 Painting especially, because he'd probably wanted to paint when he was younger but it would've been far too expensive a hobby for him back then. And Percy likely didn't travel as much in the winter unless he really had to so I imagine he wintered at Trois Fleche and spent the months painting (among other things). And he would, no doubt, have befriended many famous French artists during those years and improved on his craft by leaps and bounds once he was no longer restrained by practical concerns.

It's actually a central part of Percy's story in my fic The Deathless Divide, where after having been forced to examine the life he'd lead in the land of the dead, he realizes so many of the things he'd done had been for the wrong reasons. And then when he's sent back to relive his life, he has to make a new path in life -- for the right reasons, the ones that are true to himself, rather than motivated by the way others see him.

And in this life John actually (eventually lol) makes an effort to properly get to know Percy on his own terms, to get to know the world Percy comes from, rather than the onus of trying to fit in John's world constantly being on Percy. (You'll have to read it when you get the chance. lol)

And yeah, John really needs to get a real job again -- and not one that Hal just railroaded him into without even asking. 🙄 He honestly just needs to find an occupation that actually means something to him, personally, and that draws on his life experience -- something that he's not tied to out of familial duty. Something that's actually for himself, because John's spent his whole damn life defining himself by everything and everyone that isn't him. The man desperately needs to learn to be his own True North in life, and maybe putting some distance between himself and his family and high society is a good place for him to start getting to know himself better.

Anyway, if you get around to writing this AU, just know that I'll be all over! 😉💕

I was thinking about an AU where Percy lives, sorts things out with John and goes back to England (as Beauchamp ofc and the rest of the family also moves to England because of the French Revolution — and maybe they don’t have any heirs so Germain ends up taking the Beauchamp name and continuing the line and that’s how Claire exists BUT I DIGRESS).

So back to Percy. Spy days are over I guess? It would be too risky to start spying for England, even if he is using his married name.

But the Beauchamps are loaded, so now that he has time and money he can focus on becoming a full-time artist (in fact I have a headcanon that after marrying into the Beauchamp family Percy actually dedicated most of his free time to art, so his skills improved a lot during those 20 years).

He could also go back to the bookbinding business since it seems like it was something he liked to do, given that scene in Echo in which he talks about it.

I just like the idea of Percy living a low profile life in England, doing his art and getting into the more artistic/bohemian social circles. Nothing too fancy because he can’t risk someone uncovering his true identity — or maybe that wouldn’t be a problem after 20 years, a wig, a “fake” name and a fake French accent? idk

I just keep thinking that if Percy and John got back together, Percy wouldn’t be able to fit into the English upper crust like he tried to do in Brotherhood. They wouldn’t risk him being recognized. Which could be a point of conflict in their relationship, because they would have to keep it even more hidden than before. Like, they wouldn’t be able to hang out publicly in John’s circles.

But I think about what Diana said about their relationship in Brotherhood: how Percy wasn’t a soldier, but was willing to enter that life with John.

So for this AU I thought that (given the proper character development) John could try to fit into Percy’s life, and not the other way around. They would have to keep things low profile af, but it could work.

I don’t know what John would be doing with his life tbh (seriously what is his job atp in the main series?? Is he just a retired officer?). But he would be doing something and in the meantime he could keep running into mysteries and trying to solve them, and Percy could help him with that too.

Also I imagine them taking a few months off London every now and then and traveling to different places. Maybe they could finally go to Rome together 😭

[cheekygreenty]

Little Witch - Part 8

The Darkling x Reader

'Are you busy?' You had taken to looking for Aleksander to entertain yourself. You had already done the usual routine for the day and were bored. You had been intending to speak with him for a while but he always seemed to be busy when you asked for him. You had an inkling he knew what you wanted but was scared to approach the topic. Your wandering around the Palace and acting like a leader surely hadn't gone unnoticed by him.

You finally found him in the courtyard hopping off of his horse, looking as regal and handsome as always. The way he stood while talking to his stable boy gave you a clear view of the embroidery on the back of his kefta. The weaves of black shadows seemed to have grown since the last time you had such a close look. Magnificent

'I think I can find a moment out of my day for you' He briefly took your hand in his and lightly traced your knuckles with his thumb in a soothing manner. He always does this.

'Fantastic, I've been meaning to thank you for welcoming me back into the Palace, I feel I owe you big time.' Butter him up first.

'Nonsense, this is as much your home as it is mine' He said and started to walk towards the entrance.

'Well, in that case, is it possible for me to take up my old position?'

You studied his face while a knowing smile replaced his emotionless expression. He didn't look in the least surprised.

'How long have you been waiting to ask me that?' You couldn't help but laugh. I knew he knew.

'I have nothing else to do. I can't just sit and pamper myself for the rest of my life as lovely as that sounds.'

'Do you think you're up for it? It has been a while since you commanded an army.'

You'd be surprised. You were about to give him all the reasons you were even more suited now but he abruptly stopped and looked deep into your eyes, catching you off guard. He looked at you with longing and love. It suddenly rendered you speechless.

'So?' he quirked his head and wore that boyish smile that you loved so much.

'As a matter of fact, yes. If you wish, I'll even take over those boring council meetings with the King to prove myself.' He raised his eyebrows and let out a short hum.

'That does sound like a very advantageous proposition.'

'So I'm assuming that's a yes?'

'I shall think about it.' He looked away, away from your addicting stare and those beautiful eyes.

'Thank- what?'

Did I hear that right?

'You're going to think about giving me my own position back? I made it in the first place! It was made for me!' If anybody walked past the two of your right now, they would surely think you were about to rip his head off.

'A lot has changed since then Y/N' He attempted to walk away but you had other plans.

'Where do you think you're going? We're not done here!' You ran in front of him.

'Y/N I have business to attend to'

'So do I, and it's this' He let out an exasperated sigh.

'I said I'll think about it, I never said no'

'But you never said yes'

'I'll have to run it by the King and the rest of the council. How do you think they'll respond to me appointing a brand new Grisha as Deputy-General? A Grisha like you nonetheless, they’ve never heard of your kind'

There it was. A Grisha like me. He was scared.

'I'll talk to them myself then, maybe even tell him a story or two.' You were so enraged you considered going to the King right then and there. With a little pressure on his old heart, you would be sure to get his approval.

His demeanor suddenly changed. You were talking to the General now. Great, you thought he's talking to the Deputy-General.

'Don't you even dare.'

'You're not leaving me with much of a choice. I'll reduce this place to ash if you're not careful with your words, Aleksander' You went to turn and leave but he gripped your arm and he pulled you closer to him.

'You are so sure of yourself. Did all those years alone make you so arrogant, or were you always like this?' His words were like venom to your heart but fuel for your rage. You shook his hand off.

'That is very rich of you to say don't you think?' Your hands suddenly felt very fidgety and hot.

'Y/N I suggest you calm down before making threats to your General. You should be glad I haven't chained you thus far.' His own hands balled into fists as he restrained himself.

This was your last straw, with a loud whoosh, you sent a stream of fire his way to distract him while a nice gust of wind knocked him to his knees in front of you. You grasped his hands in yours and slowed his heartbeat, relaxing him. His eyes swirled with fear.

'Go on, send the shadows, I'll gladly take them' you said through your teeth.

Suddenly you saw movement out of the corner of your eye, oprichniki. Aleksander looked at them and shook his head. Ivan looked livid. Good for him.

You roughly let go and took a step back, disappointed that he didn't make a move.

'You better think quickly' You warned and walked off.

Suits him right.

******

Your chambers were trashed, the mirrors smashed and the bed overturned. Screams and shouts still echoed over the walls yet nobody came to check on you. The whole reason for your return was to take back your title, to be yourself again, and leave your nasty past behind you.

You swore you were better now, that you could control your impulses, that power wasn't a temptation anymore, but you were wrong. You undermined Aleksander today, embarrassed the General in front of his soldiers. But he didn't punish you. You always knew that wherever Aleksander was involved, your loss of control followed. You never understood why.

He got one thing right though, you needed to calm down. Your mind couldn't get over the feeling right before the guards came, the feeling of almost having his glorious shadows. Of almost having that part of him again. There it is again, the temptation of power. You shook your head to rid of the thought.

You had momentarily thought about taking Alina and some of her power, but quite frankly you didn't feel the need anymore. Shadows were your thing, you always had an air of darkness. So does he. You didn't fit the light, but she did.

Sleep wouldn't come to you, not even briefly. You stared at the damage of the room in the moonlight and thought back to the image of him on his knees in front of you, fearing evident in his eyes. He looked so good on his knees.

You shot up from the bed and yanked the door open, walking with a purpose, your rage having a strange effect on you. You needed him.

******

Aleksander sat at his desk, halfway through a bottle of whiskey. He couldn't stop thinking of what you did. How such a small thing had affected you and made you snap. Your eyes held darkness he had never seen before, not even in himself.

He hoped your intentions were pure, it was better than the reality he imagined in his head as you held an iron grip on his hands and slowed his heart. You looked hungry; ravenous for more.

There was a time when your power made him more attracted to you, you were his equal in his eyes. Together the two of you were unstoppable, a force to be reckoned with. But all of it changed when he seen how little you understood the power you had. Your powers were always ruled by your emotions and not by you. Today just proved to him that even after 98 years of practice, you were still a loose cannon.

He couldn't bring himself to use the shadows on you, not because you would've taken them, but because he didn't want to hurt you. For a split second, he was scared you would do something to him, but it was overpowered by the fear of what you could do to his life; turn it upside down and inside out. And he would let you.

He couldn't decide if he hated you for undermining him or whether he wanted you even more than he ever did. The tension between you two was always thick, but when he was on his knees in front of you, he couldn't help but think back to all the times he'd done it willingly, worshipping you at your feet. Rightfully so. You were a goddess in his eyes.

A door opening and shutting tore him away from his thoughts. He looked up and there you were, in nothing but a nightgown, flushed and breathing hard.

Part 9

ITS COMING sorry I’m making u wait but there’s nothing better than post-fight (literally) sex 😊😊😊

@theonelittleone @searching-for-gallifrey @0-artemis @lostysworld @xceafh @fire-in-her-veinz @cleverzonkwombatsludge @wizardwheezes @aleksanderwh0r3 @tomhollandisabae @hotleaf-juice @justmesadgirl

[mariinara]

A/N: THIS ONE'S AN ELITE ONE AND I HAD TO GET TO IT FOR MY HOMIE SHEA (@lilsnatch). HERE YOU GO, HOMIE, I HOPE YOU LIKE IT <3 (P.S. Of course I'll include Nate. He's THE uncharted boy!)

Q: What kind of drunks are the uncharted boys?

Nathan–

-Nate really isn't a chaotic kind of drunk. But when he does drink?

-Oh, boy.

-First of all, it takes a lot to get a Drake drunk. Especially this guy.

-But, he always needs to have company. He knows shit'll hit the fan, most probably, and someone responsible will have to hold him up and remind him to slow down or give him a ride home.

-Bar-hopping with you was his favorite thing, though. And it was yours as well.

-He was a flirty drunk. At least he'd start off that way.

-"Oh, hey, gorgeous!" He'd exclaim, turning his head towards you with a goofy smile on his face, "You come here often?"

-You have to physically restrain yourself from bonking him every time he does/says shit like that, but you also can't help but fidget and smile and take a VERY RESPONSIBLE swig from your beer bottle.

-And when he drinks more? He gets emotional.

-Overall, Nate was classified as your typical emotional drunk.

-Also performs a lot of magic tricks for the whole bar to see.

-Existential crisis, whining, rubbing his head against your shoulder like a hungry stray cat begging for affection, and then crying. He doesn't even realize he's crying. He just rambles and he cries mid-way.

-And then he'd get clingy. Smooching your cheek when he could, leaving you a hot and bothered mess as you contain him, sheepishly smiling at the bartender as you rub Nate's back and tell him that it's okay. Whatever's bothering him.. or not bothering him.

-His withdrawal symptoms include passing out, snoring, and sleep-talking, which means you have to take him home and stay over until he wakes up, an advil and a bottle of water on his nightstand and your body laying a safe distance from his, your position suggesting that you've been watching over him.

Sam-

-The living, breathing, walking example of fucking disaster.

-Much like his younger brother, he can handle alcohol pretty well.

-Unlike his brother, though, he doesn't really care whether he hops bars alone or with company. Although he prefers company, literally nothing will stop him from walking into the closest bar to his home and having a pint. Or two.

-Maybe ten..

-He's the sort to start a party if the place is just not uppity enough.

-Will get up on the counters and dance and sing awfully loud.

-Will 100% get people singing with him and gathering around him.

-Will have a drinking competition with a complete fucking stranger and he will 100000% win.

-Gambles, too.

-"If I win, you give me your girl for the night."

-The girl approves.

-"Is that the best you could do?"

-Proceeds to down like twenty kamikaze shots.

-Basks in the attention, even when drunk.

-These are all in the cases when he's alone.

-If you're there with him, though?

-It's a completely different story.

-You'll pinch his ear and yank him close when things are getting out of hand.

-You'll yank him down from the counter top and bring him back to sit and not make a scene because there are cops in the area and you're not prepared to bail his drunk ass out.

-He's not allowed to drink as much when he's with you and you explain how he'll definitely ruin himself.

-And while he thought he'd be annoyed by it, he found your concern quite endearing.

-He was definitely sure that he drank that much when alone because he was upset he was alone but would rather swallow a denim jacket than admit it.

-But, God, he'd definitely drink enough to give you an unsolicited kiss on the cheek, despite not being your boyfriend.

-You had feelings. Just never got around to talking about them.

-He'd flirt with you when sober, of course, but the amount of sexual innuendos that had the bystanders either chuckling softly or squirming in their seats was.. astonishing.

-Your face would instantly heat up and you'd cover his mouth.

-He's the kind to lick your palm when you do that and laugh at your reaction, though.

-Might pull his pants down and walk around half naked in public so have eyes on him at all times.

Rafe-

-Drinks a lot. Knows his liquor.

-Expensive taste so he's really hard to please.

-He's used to very specific alcohol concentrations in his drink.

-Doesn't do tequila.

-But, being the absolute hoot of a girlfriend you are, you make him do tequila.

-And then quickly realized why he doesn't do tequila.

-That's an angry fucking drunk if you've ever seen one.

-"The fuck did you just say to me?" at someone who was minding their business.

-BAR FIGHT!! BAR FIGHT!!!!

-The kind to go for the first punch but pass out on the floor mid-swing.

-Like he completely shuts down.

-If he's not swinging punches, he's demanding sex from you in very loud slurs and barely open eyes.

-Or hugs.

-No inbetween.

-And that's when you know you have to take him home and sober him up.

-Then laugh at him because, wow, heavy liquor is not for rich boy.

Harry—

-Handles his liquor just as well as the Drakes do.

-Downright horny drunk.

-When I say horny, I mean he'd be willing to unbuckle his belt and take you on the barstool.

-Dick out, no fucks given.

-Heavy liquor for DAYS.

-You'd just look at him and he'll voice how turned on you make him.

-BAR FIGHTS!! BAR FIGHTS!!

-But just cause someone was staring at you.

-Performs magic tricks that he stole from Nate.

-He will a thousand percent fuck you silly up against a wall in a bathroom.

-And you love it because he's all dirty talk, generally, but he's all filthy talk when he's drunk.

-Is not afraid to be loud during drunk sex.

-Talent? Walking in a straight line even when hammered.

-Sings pitbull songs very loudly.

-His belly gets very red when he's had too much to drink. His ears and cheeks too. It's just adorable.

Charlie—

-Philosophical drunk.

-He knows so much about everything. The man is a damn encyclopedia, even if he doesn't look like it, the man sounds like scholar.

-Can recite Shakespeare from the top of his head while raw-dogging you.

-Make sure you're on birth-control because he will not be pulling out. Nope. Not even if you tried.

-The only person who can beat Sam in a drinking competition.

-Smashes bottles on the ground when done with them.

-Existential crises. All the time.

-Likes watching the discovery channel while drunk. He just stares and laughs.

-"He said horse cock."

-"I know, Charlie."

-"You know who has a horse cock?—"

-"I know, Charlie."

-He gets very hungry and he's always craving a salty snack so you make sure you have a bag of pretzels or salty peanuts for him.

-Likes to rest his head on boobs when he gets a headache.

-Fun history facts.

-Practically indecipherable most of the time.

[curioskitty]

THE・Rarest Bakugou

Given Bakugou-kun's description as a "juvenile delinquent" (Horikoshi sensei uses the term 不良少年, or furyou shounen, meaning juvenile delinquent boy), it's expected that he wouldn't conform to standard. So obviously, it's not possible to find Bakugou-kun wearing a tie properly................

What is up with this perfectly tied nonsense right here?!

Bakugou-kun, I thought I knew you!!! THE LIES! THE BETRAYAL!!!

But, it's probably just a fluke. You didn't mean it, right Horikoshi-sensei?

WTF?! WHY?!!! Horikoshi-sensei?!

Yep. Contrary to expectations, Bakugou-kun wearing a tie correctly only ranks at Ultra Rare status: difficult to find, but not impossible.

So, what's rarer than a tie-wearing Bakugou-kun? Go Beyond, Plus Ultra Rare Bakugou!

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

In fact, it's even harder to find Bakugou-kun wearing a tie improperly. Given proto-Bakugou's loose tie design, I would have expected that to be the likelier delinquent-esque tie option. But I've only seen Horikoshi-sensei draw him like this once:

(Horikoshi-sensei's one year celebration illustration. This is still fairly early in the publication.)

On top of that, Bakugou-kun consistently wears his uniform tie-less and with at least one button undone on his shirt collar. His pants are always slung low on his hips and legs bunching up at his feet (except when he had to wear jeans for Best Jeanist). You can even see panels where Horikoshi-sensei drew in the rips at the hems near the heel where they drag on the ground.

So why the inconsistency, Horikoshi-sensei? I see you over there, stop pretending you didn't notice. I know you're paying attention.

Horikoshi-sensei gave proto-Bakugou a loosened tie, so what is the reasoning for taking Bakugou-kun's tie away?

Some No-Tie Theories

Fan Theory #1: HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW

//Like Midoriya-kun, Bakugou-kun came from a middle school with gakuran uniforms. They never learned how to tie them. Midoriya-kun messes up his tie, while Bakugou-kun doesn't even bother to try.//

I actually think this is the least likely reason. Bakugou-kun was designed to be a naturally talented genius. I think this applies to anything he wants to do. If he does something, it's always perfectly done.

Bakugou-kun can (and does if you look above) tie it perfectly when necessary.

CONCLUSION: If Bakugou-kun doesn't do something, it's completely out of personal preference or because he doesn't see a reason to.

Fan Theory #2: REBELLIOUS NATURE

//Bakugou-kun is a delinquent and maintains that image because he thinks it looks cool. Or maybe he is rebelling against fashion designer parents. Either way, because of his family background he knows how to tie a tie, but wants to be a rebel.//

I'd give partial points for this one. I'm pretty sure he wears his pants loose at least partially because he thinks it looks cool. However, Bakugou-kun's parents were noted to be designers and not specifically fashion designers.

Despite appearances, this is the kid that sleeps at 8:30pm, doesn't break school rules, and yells at his friends for smoking.

He zips up the collar on his gym track suit all the way. Both the summer and winter versions get the same treatment. He doesn't feel the need to "make a statement" by wearing his track uniform incorrectly. Outside of class, he can and does sometimes wear his track jacket unzipped, but during class he always wears it properly.

So then why does Bakugou-kun refuse to wear the band T-shirt and Christmas party Santa outfit? Because he isn't cooperative. In Ultra Analysis, his Cooperativeness Stat was the lowest rank: E.

CONCLUSION: Bakugou-kun may be non-conformist and uncooperative, but he isn't a rebel.

Fan Theory #3: TRAUMA/PTSD

//This is one of the more popular theories. Between Dabi grabbing his neck, the Sludge Villain and being restrained at the School Festival, our boy has been through the wringer. As a result, he just doesn't like stuff around his neck because it gives him anxiety.//

The Western Fandom is definitely concerned about the mental health of the kids. But I don't actually think this is the reason. Not that I don't think they all need some therapy and self care, especially right now, but there just isn't evidence for this specific trauma in Bakugou-kun.

He wears scarves and even turtle necks without a problem.

On top of that, Bakugou-kun ALSO unbuttoned the top button of his shirt and gakuran in middle school; even from before the Sludge Villain incident. There isn't any evidence Bakugou-kun changed his dressing habits due to trauma. He wore a scarf to the entrance exam for UA, too.

CONCLUSION: Bakugou-kun has ALWAYS worn his shirts with the top button unbuttoned.

These 3 theories are inadequate, too. Even if they did explain the reasons Bakugou-kun doesn't wear a uniform tie, they don't factor in the reasoning for why he DOES wear his other ties properly sometimes.

HC#1: Bakugou-kun's preference

Bakugou-kun doesn't seem to care about his image and how "extras" see him. Even during the press interviews after his hero debut, he wore the same style of open collar look. He's not shy about being nude or taking his shirt off.

But what he hates is being uncomfortable.

He is "explosively brawny". Just look at how thick Bakugou-kun's neck is when compared to Midoriya-kun's. It isn't just that Midoriya-kun is supposed to be scrawny, but also that Bakugou-kun has a thicker than average neck.

Bakugou-kun doesn't like to button up his shirts all the way because it's uncomfortable. It's reasonable that he zips his track suit and everything else up because those are looser at the neck or made of stretchier materials.

As for why he doesn't wear the uniform tie at all... Don't forget Bakugou-kun is a perfectionist and a bit of a neat freak.

He always tucks his shirt in. For the band performance he wore a collared black dress shirt. From what we saw of his room, it's minimalist and clean. I don't see him wanting to look like a slob.

A sloppy loose tie would probably irritate him more than just not wearing it (which is even funnier when you think about Midoriya-kun's chonk tie. It probably makes him want to strangle Midoriya-kun, or maybe just tie it himself...)

Bakugou-kun has difficulties compromising when it comes to his high standards. So if he has to wear it, it's going to be either 0% or 100%.

HC#2: Explosiveness

Why draw Bakugou-kun with either 0% tie or 100% tie? If Horikoshi-sensei is going for a delinquent image, wouldn't the 50% tie option make more sense?

Taking a look again at Bakugou-kun's profile page, Horikoshi-sensei describes him to be explosive in every way. That includes his whole body being "explosively brawny", but also adds a note that he looks slender in clothes.

Horikoshi-sensei put an effort to make every element of Bakugou-kun's character in some state of either fully compressed or explosive.

His slimming clothes, general appearance and even his speech patterns are highly compressed (blunt/terse) and loud. The extremes of his attitude are compressed too; if Bakugou-kun is not loudly raging, then he's quietly observing.

This contrast is key to his character. You can't explode if you aren't compressed first. It's supposed to be shocking to see how brawny he actually is under his slenderizing clothes. And I always feel shocked whenever I see this kid compressed into a tie.

HC#3: Deku & Kacchan

These two are set apart from the class by design and very much on purpose. Horikoshi-sensei designed them to be at opposite ends of the same spectrum.

If Bakugou-kun has muscular arms, then Midoriya-kun needs muscular legs. If Midoriya-kun buttons up his shirt all the way to the collar, then Bakugou-kun's collar has to be loose. Their designs reflect their connection.

So if Midoriya-kun has a poorly tied tie, the opposite of that is either non-existant or perfectly tied. If it's perfectly tied, he'd just blend in with the class.

The no-tie option just makes more sense.

Plus Ultra Rare Bakugou

Horikoshi-sensei only ever draws Bakugou-kun with a tie in specific scenarios. Costume events that require the neck tie as part of the costume or "fancy" events where everyone is in formal wear. And even in those, Bakugou-kun manages to not wear his tie 90% of the time.

So, I just imagine that when Horikoshi-sensei makes Bakugou-kun wear his tie, he's super grumpy! Just look at his face in every illustration he's wearing a tie in. He's probably hot, uncomfortable, and really not enjoying himself at all.

Ultimately, the "Plus Ultra Rare Bakugou" is a Bakugou-kun who wears the tie and SMILES while doing it.

(Yes, I know that's NOT actually a tie. Shut up Bakugou-kun. You're only smirking in this one because you won the Popularity Poll for the 5th time in a row...)

(Well that's random, you say? Welcome to my blog. Considering the stuff going down on canon, I figured I should give fans, and myself, a break from angst to talk about something silly.

Please note that this applies only to the manga. I've found that the anime isn't quite so strict about how Bakugou-kun looks.

Regarding the headcanons, I just want to clarify that everyone is free to think whatever they like. I enjoy all headcanons and support your right to have them.

I wrote this a while ago and then debated posting it because it's such a huge meta about... Bakugou-kun's tie. I had regrets. But now it's become my new years post. Regrets were for 2020, it's already 2021!

Demons out, fortune in!!! I know it's not setsubun for another month, but 2020 was such a demon.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!)

[lucifermorningstxr]

Lucifer wasn't always the best at navigating these things, but two things were true here: he didn't mean to hurt the Detective, and all he wanted was to fix what he'd done. "But Detective, I don't want you to lose your job over what we did! You always tell me not to do these things, and I do them anyway. It's free will, but surely you shouldn't be punished for mine." At his partner's desperate pleas, he softened a bit, stepping down from his soapbox. "Fine. Fine, you win, Detective. I won't say anything unless they move to fire you. Then all bets are off." His damn mandated honesty, but it worked out.

The brief respite from the heightened emotions was quickly ended, and back on the defense Lucifer went. "We were just kissing, Detective! Yes, PDA may be distasteful at times, but it's not illegal, is it?" He rolled his eyes, too proud to admit that internally, he'd already decided that would come to an immediate end. "Very well, but we will be revisiting this. He wasn't good enough for you, Detective." He bit his lip to prevent more honesty from vomiting from his divine mouth. He could unload on Pierce right then and there, but it wouldn't help anything. He was struggling to keep up himself, not one used to having these conversations with anyone, let alone someone he cared so much about. "No, I haven't been restraining myself. At least not on purpose." He sighed before continuing. "I didn't know I was, but Eve said I was. I punish bad guys, Detective, and that's the way I do it best, isn't it? That's what I'm good for, isn't it?"

There it was. It was all coming out now, and there was little Lucifer felt either he or Chloe could do to stop it. So he just relinquished himself to that fact and dove all in. What else was there to do when your partner knew you so well, knew how to get inside of you and call you out? He hated this feeling, but it's just Chloe. "I want to help you, Detective. I told you last night, I like work very much. I hated it when my Dad made me do it, but you don't make me do anything. But..." Another sigh. "... Eve was my first love, Detective. We had a lot of fun together back then, and now that she's back, maybe I was deluded to think I'd really ever be better than I was back then. Maybe my ego got the best of even me. Pierce was too good for you, but maybe Eve is all I'll ever deserve." He paused at Chloe's hand, seizing the moment to look around to make sure Eve hadn't followed at his feels like the cute little lap dog she'd been portraying herself to be. He listened, and he nodded. His bloody honesty. "Eve said I was trying to be someone I'm not with you, but I can't lie. I wouldn't lie. I wouldn't deceive you. Eve doesn't seem to think so though." He bowed his head in a moment of shame and embarrassment. Chloe shouldn't have to deal with this eternity-long trauma dump of his.

This afternoon was proving to be more of a rollercoaster than he'd ever intended for it to be, but it was probably a good thing that everything was finally being addressed. The Devil himself wasn't too bothered by the volume of the Detective's exclamation, as he had been open and honest about himself from day one, but he understood her hesitancy give the whole Kinley thing and therefore didn't take offense in the moment. Instead, he replied in a decently level, albeit shaky, tone. "Detective, I know you don't care. I know you're accepting it... I trust you. But you have to understand I'm used to being alone in this! I'm used to handling things my way because there was no other way! I was sent the bad guys to deal with all by myself. I've never had laws or restrictions, or," He took a deep breath before continuing, his hands clenched a bit at the anxiety coursing through his divine body. This whole vulnerability thing was really uncomfortable; how can humans do this all the time? "I've never had someone to share the load with me. Someone to count on and trust to make the right decisions with them, Detective."

His most vulnerable truths just kept flowing, but even the King of Fixing Shit didn't know if any of it would be enough to fix this one, but all he could do was give an honest wffort. "Detective, I would rather say something kind about my Father than tell you to go. It's not gonna happen." Never too much for serious moments, and with a penchant for using humour to cope, Lucifer coughed out a short laugh at his own joke before returning to the ambience of the moment. "I don't want to be anyone but myself with you, Detective. I don't lie about anything, and now that I know, I can't keep it up as it was. What example would that be for Trixie?" While he and the small human didn't have the most in common, they'd grown something of a relationship over the years, and he had secretly always prided himself on being a symbol for freedom and honesty in her eyes. He wasn't going soft by any means, but of course the Detective's offspring mattered to him, too. But that too was second to how much she meant to him. Similarly, his quippy line about Trixie would only be second to his confessions about her. He just needed a moment to collect himself before he could appropriately respond. "Detective, you are the most important person to me too, and that scares the shit out of me. Before I met you, I didn't know humans could be so good. I have never met someone like you, and I would do anything to protect you... even if the person you need protecting from most is me." A deep breath and another heavy topic later, onto Eve: "I understand it, Detective, and I agree. I don't even know if I want her around the penthouse anymore. I don't think I'm actually happy with her. I think we're too... grown." The revelation hit him like a truck, but a truck that would actually hurt a divine immortal. He blinked, not even believing his own ears, and studied the Detective's face for her response.

In all of his grandiose escapades, never in a million years did Lucifer ever think about how it would impact Chloe's job. After all, him and, by extension, Eve were just consultants. Why would their actions affect the Detective after she was on the record against them? Realizing the gravity though, he did feel pretty bad. "Detective, I'll talk to the Lieutenant. I'll explain everything. I'll tell her how you stopped me from going any farther than I did. You shouldn't be punished for the bad guys' actions." He took a pause, looking around a bit uncomfortable with his vulnerability before continuing. "You shouldn't be punished for our actions, for my actions, Detective. I'll fix this." The Devil doesn't lie, and Chloe knew that. He could've never dreamt things would go as badly as they had today, but he'd truly felt he was doing the right thing. Wasn't he just being himself like always?

At her next reprimand, the King of Hell just bit his lip. He hated to see Chloe like this at all, let alone as a result of his natural recklessness. "I knew you wouldn't want her help. You'd think we could handle this by ourselves... she just wanted to help! We just wanted to help." It was appsrent that Lucifer's defensiveness wasn't getting him anywhere, and with his internal aching for the Detective, he opted to relent for a moment. "I'd never set out to hurt you, Detective. We have our past, but it's not all bad... not by a long shot. I would never intentionally hurt you." His moment of vulnerability was cut short by her continued arguments against Eve though. "I don't make out with Eve to hurt you, or to be unprofessional. I do it because she's my girlfriend and she accepts me for who I am. She's not even a witness, she's just accessory consulting. I didn't think anyone would even care." He shrugged, but the look of care on his face was evident as he stepped towards Chloe. "I was unhappy with Pierce because he wasn't good enough for you! I know you deserve better, Detective." He took a deep breath. "Eve accepts me for who I am, so she's what I deserve." The mental picture he'd painted of him and Eve was rapidly fading away as it set in which woman really cared about him, but his self-loathing made it all the more difficult to accept. "If it'll make you happy and make things return to the way they were, I'll try... try to restrain myself. Happy, Detective?" The thing is though, as soon as the words left his lips, Lucifer knew Chloe wouldn't be happy. He wasn't even happy. But he was honest, and he was trying. The mention of Pierce really wasn't helping his regulation either, but he'd do his best to manage that quietly.

Nobody could put the Devil in his place like the Detective. For better or worse, she knew how to get through to him like nobody else could. What would normally result in furied anger with anyone else only made him feel guilty and sad when it left her mouth. Nonetheless, his ego led him to defend himself, to maintain his image in her eyes. "I didn't want you to see me like that, but isn't that why you have me work with you, Detective! Isn't that why we're a great team. Because we combine our skillsets to punish bad guys... isn't that what it's about?" Realizing he was stumbling over himself a bit, going in circles, he took a breath to reformulate his approach. "I don't want to get you fired, Detective. And I don't want to interfere with the case. I thought we were helping, and I'm sorry we weren't." And there it is again; Chloe putting him in his place. It devastated him to know she saw him in such a light, all because of Eve's persuasion. "I am the man you talked to last night, Detective. I am the man you thought I was. I just thought it was only part of who I was. At least, that's what Eve told me. She told me I'd never be better than I was when we met." He bowed his head for a moment like a bad dog. "Thank you for vouching for me with Detective Douche... Dan.... Detective." He nodded slowly.

He raised his head once more as she spoke of the difference between Hell and Earth. Wasn't he the same regardless of where he resided? Either way, he maintained an open mind as the two spoke. "I didn't like what I had to do in Hell, Detective, but I still had to do it. You don't like that I'm the Devil? Neither do I! But it's what I am. It's who I am, and I fear I can never retire from my identity as if it was only a job." His jaw shaking once more, his voice unstable with it. He was so close to boiling over with his issues, but he held it together for their betterment.

The Detective's tears were what really sent him over the edges though. Nothing hurt more than seeing the woman he cared about most cry. "Can we just... can we just give it another go, Detective? Please? I'll try to be what you need me to be. I'll believe you this time. I really will." A slight desperation in the Devil's voice, he needed more than anything right now just to pull her into his arms and dry her tears, but who would desire an embrace from a monster like him? "You know we don't lie to each other, Detective. I trust you. I really, really trust you..." A tear welled in his own eye. The most stoic Angel was on the verge of crying himself, all because he hurt the human he cared about most in this universe.

[sweetandsourstalker]

Sad puppy eyes suddenly fill up with hope at their reassurances. A smile, pained but genuine manages to eke it's way out of him. Even after everything that just happened, somehow they still have kindness in their heart for someone like him. As the world threatens to crumble beneath him, here they are giving him just enough butterflies to lift him up and keep the earth from swallowing him whole. He's determined not to squander this second chance. Peter moves to shake their hand as he speaks; perhaps a bit too eager to touch them but unable to restrain himself any more than he already is. "Y-yeah, okay! It's nice to meet you! I-" A moment of hesitation. The options are weighed in his split-second silence- normally, of course, he'd dodge names and tell them to give him a nickname with little explanation. But this is decidedly not a normal first meeting, to say the least. And he's already got a strike against him for such a strange introduction- he told them their own name, and that he knows where they work, and… fuck, implied he's been to their house. It already looks pretty bad and he feels like he's walking on eggshells right now. Wouldn't refusing his own name make him look even worse, let alone getting caught lying about it if he tried? And they never gave him a more neutral name, opting for one that doubles as a pet name. Adorable, and he loves it every time they call him that, but it's really biting him in the ass right now. Fuck. The dread of hearing his name on their lips is second only to the thought of not hearing their voice at all. What a shitty call to have to make, even if they honor his request. "… I'm Peter," he admits dejectedly, hand so close to Yen's that he can feel the warmth coming off of them. "But please don't-" He cuts out, thrown off by the interruption. Patiently, he waits for their attention to return; it seems important. To say he's disappointed as their hand pulls back entirely would be an understatement. His fingers curl inward as his arm returns to his side, heavy with the feeling of neglect. But… they're rejecting someone? Huh. It's good to know they're not in a place of accepting just anyone's offers, at least. Before he can really ponder the implications of them continuing to talk to him while pushing someone else aside, they tuck their phone back into their hoodie, and- And they smile at him. … How is it possible to feel so much solace and grief from a single expression? "No, it's okay! I- uh- I was just going to tell you to call me whatever you want. Please. I'd really prefer a nickname. Anything." Now his own smile is sheepish. "To make it up to you… I was thinking maybe I could treat you to lunch? I don't know if it's your thing, but there's this korean place I've been meaning to check out…" He doesn't mention that he wants to take them there because it's the only place in town that uses yuzu in it's sauce, and he wants to watch their face while they try something they might not have before. Or how long it took him to figure that one out. His work seems to be cut out for him in wooing them again from here, but… at least he's already got some ideas up his sleeve this time around.

Peter, huh?

Yen considered the name in their thoughts for a moment or two, trying to match it to anyone they could have spoken to in the last...ever, but nothing came to mind. Ah well. He didn't want them to use that name anyway, and while they weren't especially keen on calling him such a cute name as "Sweetheart" they could probably think of something else, eventually. What an odd request, though.

To be fair, this whole situation was odd.

"Well...until I think of something, Peter isn't too bad, is it?"

"It's kind of cute."

...

Huh?

Yen drew in a small, sharp breath, their legs suddenly shaking and feeling weak. They weren't sure if they tried to step forward or backwards but they almost missed it either way, wobbling in place. Everything was was hurting--like their skin was too tight and tearing, like burning rope around their neck, like something was screaming in their ears--for just a fraction of a second, and then it was gone.

Yen hissed, reaching up to rub at their neck, muttering a small swear, and froze when they only felt skin. Wait, where was their ribbon? They never left home without--

My ribbon. My ribbon from--ah.

How could they have forgotten? How long had they forgotten? It couldn't have been more than the morning, but it felt like forever that they'd felt so empty and cold. Like they hadn't known a moment of his love, not even once. They hadn't felt that in a very long time. Not even...or...maybe they had? Nothing made any sense.

But he's here. He's here, and I--oh, I scared him so much...my poor dear...

They blinked their eyes rapidly, like the everything was suddenly too bright, before they landed on him, and they let out a small, weak, unsure laugh.

"S-Sweetheart...? What--what the hell just...happened?"

[MAGICAL ANON: END]