#but makes sense when i remember hoe many times i played the first game in such a short amount of time

[clits-and-clips]

Since I quit weed I've been able to remember my dreams, and the vivid ones have calmed down, but at least once a week I'll have a dream that ends up in some sort of zombie setting and I think that's cause of playing tlou so much

[evanpeterswhoresblog]

Cherry Bomb (pt. 2)

James Potter x f!reader, Sirius Black x f!reader (mentioned)

warnings: smut, unprotected p in v, oral (male receiving), oral (female receiving), switch james? brief fingering, heavy making out, i love this smut w my heart

summary: you proceed with the second part of your plan. james potter.

word count: 2.4k

a/n: i’m so bad at writing summaries i’m sorry, i promise it’s worth it lol. i suppose this could be a stand off but i like reading them in order. hope you enjoy :) also ps if there’s any mistakes i’m sorry grammarly told me it was fine but i don’t fully trust that hoe smh

~~~

James Potter was a different story. He thought of himself as a gentleman though not many seventeen-year-olds were gentlemen. He thought this solely because he was nothing like his best mate. He had to at least know a girl's name before taking her to bed. Though, he typically liked to know a bit more than just that. So, in order to shag James Potter, one must abide by a few more rules than with dear Sirius Black. One, she must be friendly. Two, she must have some knowledge of quidditch. Three, she must be willing to stroke his massive ego despite how humiliating it may be. And four, the most important rule, she must be ready to play along with his games. Because James Potter was a chaser in all senses. And oh, how he loved a good chase.

~~~

You peak around the corner of one of the hallways, a bit out of breath. You just ran down a few flights of stairs to get here. For a few seconds you search the hallway, then he appears. He’s alone. Good.

It’s been two weeks since your night with Sirius, and it hasn’t been easy. You regret your whole show of making him remember your name, it’s caused more harm than good. But it felt good in the moment, it felt more than good. Shagging Sirius all together became your best shag the second he pressed you against the wall and kissed you till you were out of breath. You regret picking him first. In retrospect though, you had no idea how much he’d care for a second time. He’s always been known as a one-nighter. It’s been hard having to deny him, and it’s been hard convincing him that he has you mistaken for another girl. But you’ve managed.

You feel bad about it, but you try not to pay it much mind as the second part of your plan is about to begin.

You clutch your books to your chest and begin to walk down the hallway, your face down. You know what his shoes look like. So, when they begin to come closer you loosen your grip on your books and shift your body ever so slightly so that you’re in his way. Inevitably, the two of you bump into each other, and your books quickly fall to the floor.

“Shit,” you say as you fall to your knees to start gathering your things.

“Sorry love, didn’t see you there. Let me help,” he replies, crouching down in front of you.

You look at him. “Oh, it’s alright, I wasn’t paying attention.”

“Me either.” He laughs, handing you one of your papers. His eyes linger on yours. “I think I know you.”

“I doubt it.”

“No, I do. You’re the girl my mate Sirius thinks he shagged.”

You look away, pretending to be flustered. “I don’t know why he’s so set on me. I mean, I was at that party, but I went back to my dorm with my friend. And I think I’d remember a night with him you know, with his reputation.”

“Yeah, I dunno, he tends to get hammered and forget a lot,” he says. You look back at him and watch as he runs one of his hands through his dark curls. A habit of his. “I’m sure he’ll stop bothering you soon enough.”

“Yes, when the next girl is in his bed,” you reply. The two of you share a laugh and you pick up your last paper. You hold them close to your chest and stand, he follows. “Well thanks for helping, you’re very kind.”

He smiles that brilliant smile of his. “It’s only right.”

You return the smile. “I’ve got to get to class thanks again James.”

“You know my name? Are you one of my adoring fans?”

He’s smirking now, his arms folded across his chest. His ego is taking over. Perfect.

You shyly look down for a few seconds before meeting his eyes again. “Isn’t everyone a fan of the famous chaser from Gryffindor?”

“You’d be surprised how many aren’t.”

“Well, that lot must simply consist of fools.” You look down at your watch. “Seems I’m going to be a bit late to history of magic. ‘Suppose it’s alright, I don’t care for it much anyway. But I best be going, wouldn’t want to keep you from your class.”

“That’s quite kind of you y/n,” he says.

You raise a brow. “Oh? Do you happen to be one of my adoring fans?”

“Perhaps, or perhaps Sirius has been talking our ears off about you.”

“I think I like the first answer better.”

He smirks. “I see. It was nice running into you then. Literally.”

“Yes, it was.” You step past him, your eyes lingering on him for a few more seconds. “Goodbye then James.”

“Goodbye y/n.”

You leave fast with a smile on your face.

Phase one is complete.

~~~

For the next two weeks, you have more of those run ins with James. Each time having a different reaction. Some end in a sweet goodbye, some end with you barely acknowledging him at all, and some end in a quick walk through the halls together. You know how it messes with his head. One day you’re a girl who strokes his ego with flattering compliments, and another day you brush past him as if he doesn’t exist. By the sixth encounter, you relish in the knowledge that he’s starting to bump into you. Not the other way around.

“I’m starting to get Sirius. I suppose he wishes it was you that he shagged.”

The two of you are walking alone, not another person is in the hall. You look up at him, your cheeks flushing when you find him already looking down at you. He runs his hand through his hair. You hate how it makes your stomach fill with butterflies. You turn your head away.

“I don’t know why he would wish that with me.”

“I could name a few reasons,” he says.

You’ve stopped walking at this point. You turn your body to face him, another shy smile on your face. James Potter is such a charmer. You’ve known this. Yet his words affect you as if you have no idea about his reputation of being a flirt.

This is bad, you think.

It’s been hard enough resisting the urge to take Sirius up on another night together, even harder keeping up the lie that it never happened. You should stop this before it gets any worse, you know that. However, from the look James is giving you, you know you won't be able to stop this no matter how hard you try.

“Yeah?” You eventually challenge. “What reasons might those be Mr. Potter?”

“For starters, you are incredibly fit.” You watch his eyes trail up and down your body for a few seconds before returning to yours. “You’re kind, you’re funny, you make your interest noticeable, but you aren’t desperate.”

“I never claimed to be interested in you though, that’s an assumption.” You point out.

He takes a step closer to you, your breath catches in your throat. “So, if I were to, I dunno, snog you right now, you wouldn’t be pleased?”

Despite everything in your head screaming at you to snap out of it and push him away for the plan's sake, you can’t. No matter how hard you plan it seems that James Potter’s charm outdoes it. You don’t dare to move a muscle.

“I’m not sure, you might have to test and see.”

He takes another step. “I don’t want to be hexed though, if this experiment ends in the possibility of you not liking it.”

You take a step forward. The two of you are so close you can practically feel the heat radiating off his body.

“Probability and possibility are different you know.”

He lifts one of his hands to your chin, tilting it up ever so slightly. “So, it’s a possibility that you’ll push me off and hex me, and it’s a probability that you’ll...”

“Snog you harder.”

“Well, I suppose I’ll take my chances then.”

He begins to lean his head down, and you can’t stop yourself from leaning yours up, meeting him halfway. The first few seconds are gentle. You like how soft his lips are, how you can taste the mint chap stick on them. But once that initial new feeling fades so does the gentleness.

Within a few short minutes you’re no longer standing in the middle of a hallway being kissed as if it were your first. Instead, you’re pressed against the wall in a broom closet, with your shirt half unbuttoned and James Potter’s hand up your skirt. Your head falls back against the stone as he sucks the sweet spot on your neck, his thumb rubbing perfect circles on your clit. You run your hands through his curls, they’re just as soft as you expected.

“James,” you moan.

“Yes love?”

You struggle to catch your breath. “I don’t- we can’t- fuck.”

“Hm?” He presses his thumb down harder; you feel your orgasm approaching. “You alright?”

“Yes- just don’t stop,” you reply.

He lifts his head, his dark eyes meeting yours. “Whatever you want.”

It’s safe to say, after that, phase two is completed.

~~~

Another week passes before you reach phase three. You don’t know why but playing James’s game is awfully fun. You know you’ve got him, and he knows he’s got you, but neither of you will say it. So, before anything can move too far in the closets, one of you stops it with an excuse and the other doesn’t question it. Part of you keeps it going because you want him to say the words, and another part of you keeps it going because deep down you don’t want it to be over yet.

But everything must end eventually.

The game's ending comes on a quiet Friday night. James catches you after dinner, dragging you off to one of the now familiar closets. He wastes no time, instantly pressing his lips to yours the second the door closes. There’s a desperation on his lips you haven’t felt before, it excites you. Naturally, you kiss him back, your hands moving up to his hair, his moving down to your waist.

Only a few seconds pass like this, then he pulls back. You can barely see his eyes through the darkness, but what you can see tells you something different is going to happen. He’s starving and you are more than happy to give him a taste.

“Can I have you y/n?” He whispers.

“Have me?”

He nods, his hands roaming up your sides. You shiver. “I need it, need you. Now.”

“You can have me, as long as you promise to keep this between us.” You place your hands on his shoulders and push him till his back hits one of the walls. “We wouldn’t want Sirius to be jealous that you actually got to shag me. You haven’t told any of them about this have you?”

“I have not, and I won’t. I swear,” he answers. “You can trust me.”

You smile and press a small kiss to his lips before lowering yourself to your knees. “I know I can. You’re a very sweet guy James and for that I’m going to show my appreciation.”

“You don’t have to-”

You begin to undo his belt. “I want to.”

“You sure?”

“Positive.”

You unzip his trousers and pull away the fabric. You’re not surprised to find him already hard. You also aren’t surprised at how big he is. From the girls you’ve known to have shagged him, only good things came from them. You don’t waste any more time. You take him in your mouth and as far down your throat as possible. Blow jobs have never been your favorite activity, but from the sound that leaves James’s lips you know you’ll enjoy this specific one.

And you do.

You don’t know how much time passes by the time he’s cumming down your throat, but you do know you’ve enjoyed every moment. He moans your name louder than he should, his fingers tangled in your hair as he cums. Typically, you’d spit but this time you swallow. When you’re sure he’s done you pull back and rise, whipping your drool with the back of your hand.

James is breathless when he reaches for you. He doesn’t hesitate to kiss you, nor to return the favor. Your legs shake as he buries his face between them, licking and sucking your clit at a perfect rhythm. It’s not long before it’s your turn to come undone due to his mouth. You have to hold yourself up on the wall as you finish, you practically see stars.

You pull him back up a minute later and wrap your arms around his neck. He kisses you once again and you savor the taste of yourself on his lips. It’s like a prize. And a memory you will forever cherish.

“Fuck me James,” you whisper eventually. “Like you mean it.”

“Your wish is my command,” he replies.

His hands fall to your thighs, and he lifts you up. You comply, wrapping your legs around his waist as he positions his hard again cock at your entrance. He enters you slowly, both of you savoring the feeling. He stretches you in an indescribable way that makes your toes curl. You hold him tight as he begins to fuck you.

Due to his active role in quidditch, his stamina is very built. He fucks you through two more orgasms before he even begins to show a sign of finishing. Tears role down your cheeks from the overstimulation, he asks you if you want to stop. You shake your head. He continues. Each thrust hits that spot inside you that makes your eyes roll back into your head. When he does eventually finish, he fills you up, his dick pulsing inside you.

He holds you tight after, his face tucked in your neck.

“You’re amazing,” he mumbles, his breath ragged. “I think I’d like to keep you.”

In this moment, you forget about your plan, and you turn your head to press a soft kiss to his sweaty head.

“I wouldn’t mind that.”

~~~

As you lie in bed that night with your diary in hand, a fresh checkmark next to James’s name, you wonder how you’re supposed to go on to the next part. Too many emotions have gotten involved from you, James, and Sirius. You know adding another person into the mix will only cause further issues. However, you also did save the best for last. Intentionally. At least, you think so anyway. James and Sirius have given you times you didn’t know you could ever have.

But then your eyes trail over the last name again.

Remus Lupin.

The show must go on.

[blacksunscorpio]

Astro Musings No. 6

Libra Lilith

Makes one have a charm that can be deadly. The type to entice someone effortlessly. They are the types to appear innocent but have a bit of a Machiavellian ace up their sleeves. They can be subtly controlling and hard to resist. If in the 12th House, they can manipulate subconsciously and their prey

the object of their affections might not be able to see what’s going on. This can make this placement even harder to resist than a Lilith in Scorpio Jupiter square Lilith in natally or in synastry will make two people gluttons for sex. Or it will make a native a glutton for sex. Not a bad aspect but just make sure to practice safe sex and wear condoms. Worst that can happen is an STD, pregnancy if you’re not ready for it, or wearing yourself out. Your North Node

Falling into your 7th house makes one’s life direction and goal tied to their relationships. The key in this life is to care for others and be “other” oriented. If it hasn’t appeared in life [yet], you can be sure that it will manifest at some point or another.  This placement calls you to put others' needs before your own. If this happens, the key is to know that in this lifetime, your needs won’t be met until you give selflessly to another.

Advice?

Don’t rescue others. Don’t be a captain save-a-hoe. However, there’s no need to cut others off either. [Scorpios and Taureans with this placement, I know this might be difficult for you ;) ] Empower others. Listen. Help others/the ones you care for discover their own strength.

Asteroid Apollo

In astrology, is where you can take something for granted, and ignore it to your detriment. So if your Apollo is touching your Mercury for example, you can take your mind for granted. However, when you focus on it, you can become a master. in synastry, it can be the aspect that makes one enthralled with another. Kind of like Lilith or Pluto. Remember, Apollo is master of the Sun. The other person can see Apollo as this vibrant light. There can be a Luciferian light almost. Undeniably beautiful [remember the only thing that kept Lucifer from being God is the fact that he was created. Let that sink in.]  Obsessive energy with that planet/point. If harshly aspected there will be imbalance so there’s a constant need for harmony.

If One Half of Your Natal Chart is Empty... This indicates you most likely have a Bowl Chart Pattern. It typically manifests as an individual who is self-contained, has strong core values, and a strong streak of dependability. Most of their energy is within 180 degrees of their chart.

6th House Stelliums

Bring a strong focus on health and work. This house is ruled by Virgo. Indicated that there can be strong obsessive compulsions in the aforementioned subjects. If Mercury is here, this is particularly apparent. If the Sun lives here within a stellium they can be quite self-conscious. They’ll be forever working on how to be “their best selves” but won’t give themselves much grace. This particular configuration creates an excess of energy coming into the activities and affairs of this house. It generates obsessive energy. These people can throw their all into their work. The types to pull long hours and work overtime even if they don’t need the extra cash. If Mars is within said stellium, they’ll be types to binge eat but then work out for 4 hours just to burn off the calories. Trigger warning: I often see those who’ve suffered from Anorexia or Bulimia with this placement. They can have a hard time relaxing. Hypochondriacs live here as well. Advice? Take a break and get away from work and have private time. Mind your health but don’t leave it up to you alone. Seek a licensed professional to aid with recovery if you sense you might have issues that are hard to overcome. On a positive note, these individuals can become very good health gurus or at their best, be the types to excel at work and/or fitness.

Mercury Conjunct Lilith in Synastry

Indicates two people who will be intrigued or turned on by the other's mind. The Lilith person can act like Pluto [but remember synastry can go both ways] and kind of dig into the depths of Mercury’s mind. It may make Mercury feel quite uncomfortable if there are hard aspects. The Lilith person might make Mercury fantasize about some pretty illicit shit. They might obsess over them mentally. On the other hand, Lilith can find Mercury fascinating [especially in harmonious aspect] and will want to know everything about them. They can share very deep secrets with each other. Be careful about mind-games or mental manipulation. If this were to be a Tarot combination I’d see it as the Magician and the 5 of Swords 100%. Pisces Martians hate to fight and will usually be the first person to call for peace when in a quarrel. Libra Mars’ are actually the types to fight for justice and will be feistier than you think. Though Sagittarius and Gemini are Opposites... Their commonalities are their charm. Gemini’s and Sag’s can be among some of the friendliest in the zodiac. If you’re looking for the life of the party, look out for a Solar archer or twin. In addition, both can be rather detached emotionally. Sag’s are always looking outward. Think the 3 of wands in Tarot. They’re expansive. Looking for the next big adventure. Gemini’s are the social butterflies of the Zodiac, so what they’ll seek is a new friend, acquaintance, or new subject to occupy their time with. Both get bored VERY easily. They need massive amounts of mental stimulation to keep them happy. Sag’s mental stimulation has more to do with the higher mind [travel, languages, philosophy, spirituality], while Gemini’s have to do with the lower mind [numbers, words, basic intellect, etc.] Though Pisces and Virgo are Opposites... Their commonalities lie in the fact that both are introverted by nature. As mentioned above, Virgo rules the 6th house which governs work and routine. Virgos can retreat into themselves while they break things down and organize. The same with Pisceans when they get into reverie-mode. When they get into their creative trances. Pisces’ ancient ruler is Jupiter which rules the mind just like Virgo’s Ruler Mercury does. The mutable quality of their signs will allow them to jump from topic to topic, both of them staying interested in the flow and the outcome of their conversations. Sagittarius and Taurus Though fire and earth, both capitalize in the realm of indulgence. Jupiter can rule addictions just as much as Neptune and Pluto can. Venus can be hedonistic by nature as well. Both can have a tendency to overindulge. Both are quite blunt. Sag has 0 filter and Taurus is master of sarcasm and blunt statements. Both are unable to sugarcoat. Remember to be real but a little tact never hurt anyone, lol.  When You Have two signs in one house... It will also depend upon the degree of cusp both the signs make in the house. So, the energy of one sign diminishes slowly and the energy of the next sign rises slowly. For example with Leo and Virgo will play an equal part in the house and the Sun and Mercury will rule equally. If your Midheaven is in Aquarius You find satisfaction in the unordinary. There is a desire to stand out unusually. Ambition can be based in the intellectual realm since Uranus rules this sign. Uranians have the highest forms of analytical intelligence. They can excel in connecting with people. Their reputation can surprise. Many may have heard of the or speak about them. The quintessential individual whose “reputation precedes them”. They may try to shock others on purpose. However, though their public persona can be known for their charitable works they can be very opinionated and stark in their views. When under-developed they may be too stubborn to entertain other modes of thought. It’s the nature of fixed air to never change [fixed] their minds [air]. Traditional vs. non-traditional is a struggle in how they approach the world, others, and the success they wish to achieve.     1st House Venus will wear their heart on their sleeve. If Venus is in Capricorn, they may a bit slower to move in love. Perhaps take a more serious approach to things. If harmonious, it can bless some natives with life partners who may have well-established professions. Other times they show their love outwardly in practical ways. They’ll SHOW you how they love by making sure you feel secure and taken care of financially. They’ll want to leave a legacy for their children with their partner. They’ll want their kids to have generational wealth to past down. I often see this aspect with people who have a suffix in their name. Like John Doe the 3rd or someone who has a father or mother who is a Jr. People with this placement may name their children after a family member. Remember the 1st house is the house of self. If Venus is in Cancer, they may be shy in love or adversely they can be very clingy or possessive to their partner or their partner can depend on them too much-- there may be a “mommy” thing going on.

If you’re looking for “immediate attraction” in synastry...

It’s not Pluto. Surprised? People mistake that love at first sight thing for Plutonic influence, but Pluto is shy by nature. Hades minds his business. His obsession will grow though the longer he studies and spends time getting to know you. That's when he’ll start netting up the web.

Uranus is who hits you with that out of the blue. Uranus/Venus interaspects

Can make people feel that instant attraction from out of nowhere. Asteroid Cupido can inflict this on two people as well. In mythology, Cupid son of Venus; his job was to "wound" the unwary with his arrows of love; awaken a consuming affection directed towards a particular object of desire. In astrology, the asteroid Cupido itself is associated with initial enthrallment and acts of seduction performed in order to obtain the love object, not the sexual act itself. It’s the “look of love.” Examples of an overactive Cupido can include crushes, cultivating romance for the sake of the game, or putting the object of desire up on a pedestal. In the dark sense, romantic enthrallment can originate out of a love for the chase, only to abandon the prey once it is caught. That can happen with love at first sight if there aren’t stable and grounded aspects to lock two people together. Uranus also represents sudden breaks, so there can be on-again-off-again tendencies in relationships like this.

Common placements found in people who are surgeons and physicians are often:

Strong Virgo aspects or earth placements

Mercury rules the hands. Virgo is dissecting and analytical. The 6th house is also about health and service. They love to take things apart and put them back together.

Capricorn

as well is quite grounded so they often have steady hands- something a surgeon needs if they are to stand for 10 hours straight during an open heart procedure.

Plutonians

tend to be quite good with medical/surgeon/mortician occupations. Blood, the raw parts of humanity, death does not scare these people. They like to know how things work from the inside. I also see many Moon-Pluto

people with surgical prowess. This aspect I often see in gynecologists. Last but not least, Strong Mars is not afraid of gore or blood. Mars is often seen in surgeons. Mars is all about blood and broken bones. As a result, those with Mars in Aquarius is often seen in orthopedic surgeons. Mars in Cancer or Mars touching Chiron can be good rehabilitation or out-patient doctors. Physical therapists as well.

Your Elevated Planet at an Anaretic degree

[last degree in a sign] can make one feel like they have to rush to become successful. To reach the pinnacle of their dreams as soon as possible. They may feel like no matter how much success they have it is never enough. There may be constant transformation to this most elevated. The closer to the MC, the more it will display itself in public life. They may build and rebuild their reputation over and over again. Take Robert Downey Jr. whose most elevated planet is Neptune [like most actors]. It is at 29 degrees and we see him go from drug-addled Hollywood bad boy just for that reputation to die [29 degrees] and then be reborn into Sherlock Holmes and our beloved Tony Stark [RIP].

If you find yourself able to adapt to most kinds of music

Check to see if your Mercury [communication] or Venus [what you appreciate] is in a mutable sign, a water sign. Also check to see if your moon is mutable or in a water sign. Jupiter is also the ancient ruler of Pisces and he rules expansion and joy. Music is often considered a source of joy and higher thinking. Strong Jupiterian influence can make someone like different kinds of music. Uranian placements such as Sun/Moon or Venus too, it can also be processed very much by the subconscious, So look for  Strong Neptunian or 12th House influence. Strong Virgo placements too since music is technically a science. Why? Because it can be measured. 

Gemini Moons 

Especially in the 2nd house will feel most secure in an intellectual environment. They may also excel monetarily by using their minds to make money. Writing books or setting up podcasts to get their thoughts [mercury]  and voices [2nd house] out there.

Sugar Babies... Are usually the Venus in a Venus/Saturn situation, the Moon in a Saturn/Moon connections, or the Moon in a Moon/Pluto connection. Lilith in trine aspect to another planet in synastry brings out the best in Lilith... Yes, they can still be intense but you’ll see less of her “demonic” energy and more of her benevolent yet wild seductress aspect. With Venus, she’ll bring out the erotic side between both people. Borderline Hedonism in both people. She’ll make a more austere planet like Saturn open up. Make him comfortable with his depraved side instead of flogging himself like a penitent monk in private over it.

Dangerous Natal Placements Can Be:

Neptune in the 8th [rules drownings, suicides, death by mysterious means]

Gemini 8th House

[Can rule breathing issues]

Aries 8th House

[Rules violent deaths or those who can be prone to violence. Be it dishing it out or receiving it.]

Saturn square Pluto

Can make someone quite cruel.

3 or more malefic aspects to Jupiter is often found in psychopaths.

Jupiter in the chart is where we show the most benevolence. Forgiveness and Kindness. If Jupiter is having a hard time, a person may be emotionally stunted or out of touch with their spiritual side. 

Dominant Nessus

Can make someone an abuser.

Mercury in hard aspect to Uranus or Neptune

can cause mental imbalances or someone who has sudden breaks of the mind. The native will need to take care to make their mental health a priority.

Excessive malefic placements to Mercury

Can make someone a pathological liar or have a difficult time telling the truth. 

Algol in hard aspect to Pluto, Sado, Nessus, Saturn

Can also indicate cruelty but also someone who gets pleasure from it. Yikes.

Underdeveloped Leo placements:

Can make a native only focused on their ego and their ego alone which can make them into quite self-serving and as a result, they can suffer from megalomania. Same with Underdeveloped Arian/Martian placements. Hitler was an Aries and Benito Mussolini was a Leo/Apollonian. I’ll just leave that there.

5th house synastry

Makes two people have fun together. If the moon is there they will know what makes the other person “feel” good. What that person needs to make them laugh.

Your 12th House Planets

Are the Planets that are either hidden or expressed more in secret. The ones that have a harder time expressing or exposing themselves.

A 12th House Leo Planet

may only feel brave when they alone. These are the types to take part in drama or be thespians in school because they are easily able to express themselves when they feel they have the safety net of a mask.

A 12th House Cancerian

Planet will find it harder to express emotion or be a bit shyer.

12th House Plutonian Placements

may be extremely introverted and perhaps find themselves able to express themselves more online/ in secret. They can be good at covert ops or spying. They can even be quite psychic. 

12th House Venus/ Venusian people can find love to feel dreamy or even goes unexpressed. Dreamy romantics. They can be unconditional in love but sometimes they can get carried away with their fantasies OR they can love the fantasy of love more than the reality which may cause them to either project their fantasies on others or never fully commit because no one will ever live up to the fantasy they’ve created in their minds about someone else. Take care to love who you love because of who they are. Don’t force anyone to fit into a mold they’re not made for. Astro Musings No. 1 Astro Musings No. 2  Astro Musings No. 3 Astro Musings No. 4  Astro Musings No. 5 Astro Musings No. 7 Astro Musings No. 8  Astro Musings No. 9  Astro Musings No. 10

[jinhyun]

how did you get into skz? and who caught your eyes at first?

sorry it was a "one thing about me" game and i just asked about skz 😭 (im the last anon)

lmaooo the question is still about me in a way so don't worry 😹 it's a kinda long and funny story actually

so i had this friend in bts tumblr who became a multi stan and skz became their ults and she was trying very hard to get me into them when they just debuted, but back then i was in my second year of law school and didn't really have time to stan any other groups apart from bts.

while that was going on, i remember coming across a pic of hyunjin at a fansign and i was like. instantly in love. and i dmed it to her and was like HELP WHO IS THIS and she was like THAT IS HYUNJIN FROM STRAY KIDS and i asked about him ofc and found out he was 18 at the time and i was 21 so i went "okay nope he babie, bye" and would just kinda appreciate him from afar jdñskd bc he was soooo beautiful i would melt every time but he was babie to me back then :(

thennnn time passed by and i would always read about this "felix" guy and how talented he was and whatnot, but i didn't have a face to relate to him nor did i know he was from stray kids.

fast forward to early 2019, i was on the train to uni one morning dozing off at like 7am and i didn't have spotify premium back then lmao so once a playlist of mine ended it would just start playing random songs i didn't really look up. so i was listening to bts and their album ended and this reallyyyyy upbeat song started playing and i was kinda startled bc i mean it was 7am jdñaksña but it was so gooddd so i took my phone out to see what song it was and turns out it was miroh by skz 🥲 so i added it to my playlist and texted my friend like DUDE THIS SONG IS SO GOOD and she was like I TOLD YOU TO LISTEN TO THEM!!!!! so yeah she got really excited about it and sent me so many recs and told me all about them and i just finally gave in lol.

the first mv i watched was victory song and i was blown away by felix's voice and i finally saw his face and i was like oh okay so this is why everyone talks about him. and i thought he would be my bias right away BUT THENNNNN i saw hyunjin (kinda had forgotten he was part of skz by this point) and i was like 😭😭😭😭 and i think he was 19 by then and i was like ah fuck it and just stopped fighting it lol.

so yeah i was like, hyunjin first caught my eye as an individual but felix first caught my eye as a skz member, if that makes sense?? and regardless of me being a hoe for hyunjin, i got into skz mostly bc of felix's voice lmao, i just kept watching mvs and listening to their songs just so i could hear his voice. but hyunjin has been my ult all along :(

jinnie stan from day -1.

inbox me one (1) thing you want to know about me!

[putseraphinaonthaphone]

Groupchat pt. I

CW// recreational drug use, group sex, poly dynamics, virgin reader, queer reader who uses she/her pronouns and feminine descriptors, intoxicated sex

It was an interesting group of friends that you had. Well, 'friends' was a stretch, but you had a groupchat. The name was simply 'fuckers' because for some reason Bakugou was allowed to name the chat. You had the same group of stoners you ended up partying with every weekend, getting high off the strongest shit you could buy and letting loose to work off the stress of the week. It was cliche but true, you blew off steam getting high and dancing like a slut-- self care. Somehow it had evolved to more of a four person party that wasn't really a party, but you played music, smoked, and the boys watched you dance while devouring the healthy but tasty food you prepared because when you're high everything tastes 100 times better and you'd been on a restricted diet because of your chronic health issues since you were a teenager. When you'd explained this in the group chat, the most concise response you got was "so you'll cook for us?" Stoners were just your people honestly. Or maybe it was these stoners.

Bakugou mellowed out considerably after a few blunts, and he offered to blow up whoever made you cry the first time you met coming out of a party to smoke after you had a call with your best friend from back home. He'd told you that your dynamic as friends only worked if he was single. You didn't know if you'd ever have another friend like him. And there was Bakugou, offering you a blunt and violence that seemed like just the kind of friendship you craved in that moment.

Shinsou was one of the few people who came to the party simply to find people to smoke with. He rarely talked, but he was really good company you thought. He always brought indica strains-- your personal favorite as well as his you found out. Sometimes you guys talked about how it was cruel to have so many dreams but so little energy to pursue them. Sometimes you guys went back to his place and smoked yourself into a sleepy haze that always ended up in the warmest cuddles you've ever experienced.

Dabi had a viper's tongue and an even worse attitude than Bakugou. But he was cool, you bumped into him at a party when you were looking for another smoker to borrow a light from. You were feeling caustic after a phone call from home. "You got a lighter bro?" He seemed a bit amused by your masculine energy wrapped in a lush femme presenting form, like he was relieved to finally seeing someone interesting. "You look like you got all sorts of daddy issues, why haven't we met before?" His tone was both flirtatious and condescending at the time. "Whatever gave it away?" You snorted as you lit up your blunt, white grape game wrappers. But your tone was flirtatous as well as you handed your blunt to him, "We're meeting now. To shitty dads who deserve to sleep in the bed they made."

Shoto was the anomaly. You saw him around your department, guessing he was an upperclassman in your major. And one day he was at Dabi's place when you all got together to celebrate finally getting an off campus hangout spot. Apparently Dabi was an old friend, kind of like an older brother to Shoto. They definitely had a thing going on, but thinking about it too long made your face burn. His preppy appearance was shattered when he wore a short sleeve shirt instead of his usual button downs, and you saw the traditional japanese tattoos that made a full sleeve in white ink. You also noticed his silver gauges that were almost hidden by his white hair and when he pushed his hair back you saw more piercings on his ears. But when he smoked you under the table you decided you were almost in love.

If you happened to hope that one day at least one of the hot but dumb fuckers you smoked with took the hint of your many personal dance shows and fucked you, that was no one's business but your own.

You worked through the week, bullshitting assignments- but well because you were a fucking genius in your field, and on friday you decided to just wear a bra, shorts and an over shirt to the party with a beanie on your shaved head to complete the look. The pregame was at Shoto and Dabi's place this time, a short walk if you thought about the liquor and weed waiting for you. You weren't prepared for the brisk wind to meet you when you stepped out of your dorm.

"Hoes don't get cold." You chanted under your breath as you started walking. Your construction boots kept your feet warm, but the black booty shorts that were frayed at the edges left your lush thighs and your entire legs exposed to the cold wind. But after a few more minutes of walking you gave up- you weren't a good enough hoe, and you were cold. So you bit the bullet and put into the group chat:

smokerdeepthroat 11:19pm

Someone come pick me up, I'm freezing my literal ass off.

blueflamer 11:22pm

Walk bitch.

boomboi 11:24

Cash gas or ass, you know the drill.

smokerdeepthroat 11:25

Y'all can run a train on my ass if someone just picks me up before I freeze to death.

sleepystoner, icyhot, boomboi, blueflamer | read

Shit. You hadn't actually meant to send that. And of course the one time Shinsou checks the chat had to be now. "Fuckers," you grumbled under your breath. At this point it was almost like calling them your boys in a fond tone, and that thought had you almost puking onto the concrete. The fact that you were blushing was completely irrelevant.

Before you could freak out too much- internally of course, you were not going to be caught simping with one of them on the way to pick you up- you heard the familiar roar of Bakugou's car coming down the street. The bass of his emo ass rock music shook the street and you were climbing into the car before he could yell at you to get your ass inside.

You might have moaned at the heated seats, rubbing your hands over your freezing thighs. "Thanks Bakubro. It's cold as fuck and I was too excited to pregame to bring a jacket."

"A jacket isn't the problem. Your ass is hanging out." His words as usual were followed by a plume of smoke. His crimson eyes trailed over your body and a heated smirk curved his lips. "But that just means easier access for us."

"Y'all dusty ass hoes know I was joking-" You tried to bluff, tried to deflect with bravado as you took the blunt from him. But your hands shook, and Bakugou met your gaze with a quiet intensity that was somehow worse than his explosions.

"You dance like you need a dick in you. And only for us. We waited for you to make your choice, but this is less complicated." Damn it, he was smoking the horny weed. But if you were honest all weed was horny weed to your squad. There was an eroticism in the craving just one more hit. Just one more epic high. Just one more shudder of pleasure, as touching yourself to the thought of the boy's eyes on you when you got back to your dorm was as much a part of your friday night ritual as the weed.

Whenever you started smoking you felt yourself happily descending into hedonism. Bakugou's voice certainly wasn't helping. Your throat was impossibly dry- from the smoke, from desire- as you admitted quietly,

"I'm a virgin." You weren't going to apologize, compromise or argue. It was a statement and he could take it or leave it.

Bakugou wasn't an idiot. But he also was a possessive bastard in a way that made you wet even though you rolled your eyes at it.

"I'll make it good for you when I pop your cherry. I met you first, I'll take you first. I got you." It wasn't a promise, it was confident statement you knew he would stop at nothing to make a reality. His relentlessness was something that drew you to him in the first place if you told yourself the truth. He shifted gears smoothly and rested his warm hand on your bare thigh as he drove you back to the off campus house. You smoked half the blunt listening to his music and getting wet from his hands wandering higher and higher up your thigh.

You walked in to the house and realized how much you'd underestimated how serious Bakugou's words were. It seemed like it was a long time coming when you walked into Dabi's low lit living room to find him with his hand on Shoto's dick, Shoto's hand on his, and Shinsou lazily palming himself.

"It's about time you got here, you can't just drop shit like that in the chat when you're not here to bend over for us." Shoto's white and red hair was a mess, and given that it looked like the two of them were edging each other (sadists), his fucked out face made sense.

"She's a virgin, Icy Hot, you're gonna have to wait. I gotta open her up first." You in the mean time were going to start the music while smoking a bit hurriedly, hoping you were well and truly high before they actually started to run a train on you.

"Play the dick down playlist." Shinsou rasped from the couch and you wanted to cry at the head assery you had to put up with from these morons. (/s) But they're your morons, some lonely part of you whispered.

"It actually better have good music on it." You griped, but yeah, you were feeling the impact of whatever Bakugou had given you to smoke because your words weren't as harsh as you meant them to be.

"I call dibs on her ass cherry." Dabi's low voice cut throat the soft grunts from Shoto.

"Next time." Bakugou muttered watching the way you started to dance, having shed your overshirt to simply dance in your shorts and bra. None of the boys danced with you, a rule you'd had to put in place when they literally started fighting like children over who's turn it was to dance with you. Somehow it hadn't gotten better, these jealous bitches would sulk if you didn't give them all equal attention during your provocative performance. You solved this by closing your eyes and not looking at any of them while you let your body follow the nasty beat of the playlist. Sometimes you murmured lyrics if you remembered them and all four men were enraptured by the sight of you surrounded by smoke and dancing like a ancient goddess that could command them all in an instant.

It was moments like these that made you think maybe you were all a little more than friends by now. More than just groupchat contacts. But friends. Maybe more?

The blunt you finished yourself, until you were light headed and craving more. More music, more bass to move your hips too, maybe something to move your hips against. You didn't hesitate when Bakugou patted his thighs.

In fact, the weed in your system convinced you it only made sense to take your shorts off before straddling him. Better that than having to stop just when you're finally getting what you want right? You forgot you were just wearing some lace boyshorts with pale pink roses framing your luscious curves and dusky skin until you heard;

"Slutty girl." It was a groan as Shoto's grip on Dabi's cock tightened from the view of your fat ass sitting on Bakugou's lap.

"Nah, not yet. She's just needy." Katsuki smirked when you blushed from his words, even as you started grinding down on him in revenge. The choked moan that escaped him and the cocky glare you turned on all of them made all of them crave you that much more.

"You're needy to fuck me too, you all are. Don't forget that, explosion bitch."

"Point made. But watch it, little girl. It's gonna be a long night." His words were low and raspy from smoke, and even thought it should have been a threat your pussy gushed and soaked your panties anyway.

Four pairs of eyes watched your every move, drinking in the sight of you half naked, boldly staking your claim on all of them-- which only made them want to return the favor. Claiming you over and over until you wouldn't deny you belonged to them.

A long night, huh?

To be continued.....

[ninja-bitch]

could you do a hxh adultrio relationship h/c with a female s/o if you wouldn’t mind pls?

This ask is sending me because I’ll be honest none of these guys would make a good bachelor. They’re all horrible. But y’know, we do be into it, so??? You probably already know that and you know anon I’m supporting you a 100%, I would too, I would. I have no survival instinct. Leorio is right there and we all fall for murderer clowns (I’m counting Chrollo in) and the grudge lady ripoff aelflzarnglkznrkz. Don’t mind me! 

Thanks for the ask love <3

Warning: For Chrollo’s behaviour tbh, quite manipulative. Overall the adultrio is pretty bad. Self care would be staying away. Pretty sure Hisoka wants to kill the reader.

Chrollo relationship HCs (SFW)

He’s a hoe who would sleep with the enemy to get information. I said what I said. Do not expect fidelity. He wouldn’t see doing that as cheating. Also, he may or may not have an ulterior motive when he gets in a ‘relationship’

He’d be an asshole. He’d be an asshole that you see once a year who brings the most expensive gifts but you don’t know what he does, he’s always vague.

Very good at speaking his way out of an argument and blame, you’d end up questioning your own behaviour. Oh but he’d be so charming, maybe he’s right?

No but he’d appreciate domesticity too, he’d find it relaxing, he’d actually force it a bit. It would all feel like you’re playing on a stage though if you pick up on his behaviour, like he’s got small tells, he’s good but maybe, maybe he wants you to find out he’s not that good of a person.

But overall very good at playing house (is that the English term???). I do think he’d be good at making someone feel loved, important and smart. He’d be quite nice, but then he would crush you with the most revealing truths about yourself that you try to ignore, he’d do it at random times. I feel like he’d like to do that and then read his partner’s reactions. He’d love to just test things, like a whole experiment. Oh human emotions, let’s see.

I feel like he’d question his own emotions too. But I don’t think he’d be one to fall in love. Maybe he could, who knows? He doesn’t know. He wants to know.

It wouldn’t be a balanced relationship. He’d kind of show up when he wants to, expect a partner to welcome him with open arms, not ask too many questions and definitely expects them to answer all of his. He’d know a partner by heart too. He’d learn to read them quickly.

Very nice conversationalist though. He’d love to share about lots of things that aren’t related to him specifically. He’d appreciate a partner that could follow and talk about anything.

If they figure out what he does he’d actually be proud. Yes ok you figured it out, I steal and kill people for a living, what are you going to do now? He’d be thrilled, are they going to be scared, are they going to ignore that, call cops? Are they going to be happy? He’d be one to date a ‘regular’ person, a civilian, so I doubt they’d be happy about that but well, they could be.

I could also see him having a playful relationship with another thief or hunter. Or even a member of the law, like a detective or something. Do you know killing eve? He’d be Villanelle.

I don’t think he’d talk about them to the troupe, unless they were put in danger and he couldn’t act on it, because despite being a distant, player bitch he still wouldn’t take kindly seeing a partner in harm’s way. If that make sense. He wouldn’t call them his partner, just someone that’s got to be protected here and now. They’d figure it out though, they don’t really care.

Illumi relationship HCs (SFW)

Now, this dude would be the one who’d come the closest to have an actual relationship with someone, next to Chrollo (who’d just be playing house again). How the turntables. No-feelings Illumi is THAT guy.

I feel like his attitude wouldn’t change much with a s/o. He’d get with them and be like, ok so now : marriage, children. Good good good. He’d be pretty blunt about all that.

First I do not know who that guy would go for. But he would make the first move, I don’t think he’d like if someone flirted with him uninvited (unless he’s already into them maybe?), you wouldn’t know I’ll be honest, but if he’s willing to spend some of his precious time with you, it’s a huge sign.

He’d move quickly, it would be overwhelming. Like hey we started dating about 2 weeks ago (And to be honest there’s no change overall in his behaviour) but here’s my mom. Don’t mind her, she’ll try and have you murdered, see if you can take it. If you have what it takes to date her son.  That is if you can open their front door. Like that’s the first step.

Nah but he’d be quite curious about a s/o’s behaviour I think. Like you’ll probably be more expressive than he is. He’d actually like that, but would also apply rules that apply to his family to a partner. Like don’t be too lovey dovey and weak that’ll put you both in danger and that might also annoy him. Though he’d appreciate marks of affections, given at the right time and place. So in private I think.

Would take forever to have a first kiss with someone, maybe they’d have sex before he does that. Or maybe his partner will do that first. He isn’t one for PDA and he doesn’t see it as a huge sign of affection. He may change is mind on that though.

I don’t think he’d fall in love, or at least not easily, I think it would rather be him and this person, his possession (almost) who he doesn’t mind much. Now if they were to really join the family that could change.

Nah but he’d always know where you are and what you’re doing. He’d leave you alone, but he would know, that’s his way of being affectionate. He’d show up unannounced a lot. Like hey I was killing someone in the neighbourhood, here’s their necklace, I thought it looked good.

He’d the only one that would genuinely remember your birthday (the other probably have ulterior motives if they do) but he wouldn’t do anything. You wouldn’t know. Good job Illumi.

Hisoka relationship HCs (SFW but also NSFW-ish)

Lmao, the WORST. Does he want to fight or fuck who knows? He probably wants both and more.

I do not think he’d get in a relationship at all, at least not a regular one. He’d visit a ‘partner’ quite a lot though. Would be one to use the word boyfriend or grilfriend just to annoy them, not genuinely.

He’d still try and fuck a lot of other people too. He’d be a far better fuck buddy I’ll be honest. I feel like he would make it sexual, strictly sexual anyway. Wouldn’t care if they fucked someone else, the more the merrier, he wants to be invited.

Wouldn’t hide what he does for a living (I mean, what does he do really?) and would love to keep his intentions to fight them known at all times.

Nah, but he’d love to play games. Like tease a partner about everything and anything, flirt, let them think he loves them and then ditch. You’d never know what the truth is. 

Oh but he’d both be very good at praising and belittling someone. Whatever he feels like doing to be honest. 

Sometimes he can be nice and more serious, those are the weirdest, most uncomfortable times. Is it real? Is he getting real with you or is he just playing? It would feel so out of character, you wouldn’t know and you’d want to trust it. Don’t

Nah but if they were to suggest a relationship, he’d find it quite fun though. I think he might get in a relationship just for the hell of it, like can you entertain him? Let’s hope he doesn’t get bored too quickly because I think he’d find regular relationships quite boring. If they were to have the same mindset he’d be thrilled. You’re both clowns.

Would be one to love arguments and start them for drama. He’d say some out of pocket shit just to rile them up, that makes him horny.

I want to say he wouldn’t take them on a date, and hell, if he did you’d probably be arrested for outrage or some shit. But would love to hang out. Would use someone as a scapegoat.

Now again, I don’t think he’d fall for someone, but he’d be able to value them a lot. He could quickly change is mind though. Would sacrifice them if it meant he could keep on living and doing his own shit. But you know, I feel like he might get a soft spot for someone. He’d realise it and ditch though. No in this fucking house. He’s not the one being played.

But he could also become very protective, in an unhealthy way. Like that’s my ripe fruit person thing, I get to harm them not you.

Now I don’t know why you’d want to do that but he’d be wonderful if you introduced him to your family. He’d be having a lot of fun. They would love him. Give or take.

[normal-thoughts-official]

I would have loved to see more interactions with the seelies- people who can’t lie but are crafty and secretive sounds fascinating. Think of the dialog! Alec going to magnus for advice since he has centuries of experience talking to them, Alec playing mental chess while trying to maintain peace. Would have loved getting more- but let’s be real, Cassaundra and the show writers weren’t clever enough to actually make any conversations like that of value.

SAME!!!!! honestly i would have loved to see so much more of the seelies. like bro do you understand that their culture predates the VERY EXISTENCE OF HUMANITY??? they are the ONLY kind of downworlders whose culture is completely detached from any human culture, not only because of predating it, but also because of the relative isolationism - which means human culture barely had any influence on their culture and history AS it developed

so like you can literally go fucking bonkers??????????? you can make ANYTHING. they have a whole ass society that doesn't have to have ANY ties to mundane concepts or history AT ALL. complete creative freedom. you could do ANYTHING! and don't get me started on the potential this has, within storytelling, to contextualize a lot of stuff modern western culture sees as natural or timeless as actually pretty fucking specific - like monogamy, cisheteropatriarchy, the gender binary, racism. all immortals have that potential of course since they can come from an array of different cultural and historical backgrounds but seelies in particular have SO much potential that is NEVER! FUCKING! USED! it all goes to waste and they are just a generic vaguely monarchic society that behaves literally exactly as modern western cultural standards. WHY. i'll never stop being salty, especially within sh where all this potential was there and instead they just villainized the seelies like no tomorrow for nO FUCKING REASON, and included a whole plotline about their ruler being a terrible power-hungry person and then proceeded to act as if that would have no influence on the seelies under her rule? thanks for nothing

like i know the seelie queen was so badly written that her own motivations even as a power-hungry wacko didn't make sense or were consistent (like why give simon the mark of cain for example, and for god's sake what kind of power-hungry crazy bitch gives their main enemy the power to literally kill her and destroy everything she has at the blink of an eye, like??? she literally tried to assist in her own genocide, it makes no fucking sense, i fucking hate it here) but if they are going to make her Terrible the least they could do was show how that impacted the people under her rule, especially if they are going to have meliorn be fucking tortured and either forced to display the marks of said torture or choosing to display them themself, like? please give your plotlines one singular thought

but of course it's easier to villainize seelies and reduce them to their obviously tyrannical ruler so they can go back to focusing on the shadowhunters and their issues. nevermind the fact that seelies are obviously equivalent to native ppls/third world countries resisting colonialism/imperialism in sh's stupid ass racial metaphor, which makes making their ruler a big bad unequivocally evil villain that is ruining everything A Choice. and a particularly choicy Choice considering they cast a middle-eastern man to play the most important seelie character. but if they are going to do that they could at least address how the people under her rule suffer and how that's a direct consequence of shadowhunter colonialism and interference, but why would we fkcnig thdo that!!!! when we can have love triangle drama or whatever

and tHEN there is the whole aspect of being unable to lie which is bound to have such an impact on their culture and history since they have to rely on other forms of communication to protect themselves - and considering the whole "tyrannical rule" plotline, to further the queen's agenda in the first place. and how telling the truth without preamble would probably be considered a huge display of trust in a society that has culturally developed so many ways of talking around things. like again the potential of the cultural and historic background for that society! it makes me go insane!!!

anyway all of that to say #JusticeForSeelies and #SeeliePlotlinesNow 2021 and forever. and YES i would have loved to see more interactions between them and other characters, particularly magnus because 1- admittedly i'm a hoe; and 2- magnus was clearly the one that had the most experience talking to seelies and that others relied on for that communication. he also seemed to be the most comfortable with them, which indicates there is either some sort of history there, or magnus just happens to feel relatively at home with the workings of their culture. which makes sense, because magnus also had to develop pretty similar defense mechanisms due to his, A- work as a warlock representative who has to interact with shadowhunters on the regular; B- history with having to deal with asmodeus, which required him to be very smart about what he disclosed and how, especially considering that he had to have been planning banishing asmodeus for a long time before he got to do it; and C- just history with abuse in general. we've seen the way he closed his heart off to new people; but at the same time, magnus is obviously an extrovert and likes to be around people in general. this meant that, in order to be able to both be in the kind of environment where he thrives and protect himself/his heart/his feelings, he had to learn how to interact with people while putting on a convincing façade, which requires pretty much the same sorts of wordplay and defense mechanisms that seelies use

magnus is good at wordplay, he's good at using talking to his benefit; we've seen that. he is also good at hiding and deflecting. he is notably not good at directly lying - every time he directly said A Lie such as "i am perfectly fine and not bothered by this at all :)" it was way less convincing than it was a clear display that he wouldn't budge. even alec, who has difficulty with social cues, noticed the lying and seemed concerned about it. so like. clearly his defense mechanisms were less lying and more dancing around subjects, directing conversation to safe topics, and guiding people to making certain assumptions and seeing sides of his that were safer and he preferred

so in that way it makes sense that magnus is somewhat in his element when dealing with seelies. i think "comfortable" is a strong word because this whole song and dance takes a huge toll on anyone's mental health and energy (which i think is something that could be very interestingly explored in seelies, their collective psyche, and their culture, the way they build relationships, etc. let meliorn have partners they feel 100% comfortable talking without preamble with 2k21), but it's something he is used to and a dynamic he can fall into without as much effort as others who would be second guessing themselves more and going slower, which clearly gives the seelies, who are used to it, an advantage

and like i know that i'm implying a confrontation or sort of situation where they are on opposing sides to seelies here, which i kind of am because i am thinking mostly about magnus' interactions with the seelie queen specifically, since she was the seelie he had the most meaningful interactions with. his interactions with meliorn were very few and almost never relevant, i barely remember them happening outside of generic downworld cabinet interactions tbh. but i don't just mean that because again, stop villainizing seelies 2k21

i also mean just generally that magnus would be in a more comfortable position talking to seelie strangers and slowly working into building a relationship and mutual trust. and just generally understanding them and the workings of their culture because he can empathize with the way they have built their social defense mechanisms. no one is 100% truthful to strangers, but seelies always seem kind of- analytical. and the cultural difference + anti-seelie racism makes them seem untrustworthy to most people, but magnus Gets It, so the potential for friendships! and the mutual understanding and the relative comfort around each other! and both parts understanding the enormity that is letting their walls down gradually and being more direct as time goes by. like.... aaaaaa

and yes magnus becomes a sort of reference on talking to seelies, mostly because he is good at "playing their game", but also making it a point to humanize seelies and making the other parts understand where they are coming from and how they feel :) and just improving their relations, particularly with other downworlders

im not going to get into alec because 1- the relationship between shadowhunters and seelies is already filled with oppression and a lot of complications, and particularly now that the seelie realm is politically fragile due to the loss of their ruler (however terrible she might have been), it would play into either white savior narratives or just straight up colonialism, especially given how alec as a leader already has a history of trying to build tutelage over downworlders (i don't care what his intentions were, it's still true, and although he's learning... well. he's learning, continuous action); 2- that would be more a relationship of opposition and i'm not that interested in that. but i would love to see seelies rebuilding themselves and their relationships and alliances with other downworlders particularly, and all the better if magnus is playing a part in that :)

in short:

more seelies

more magnus with seelies, especially friendships

more focus on the politics of seelies now that the seelie queen is gone

more seelies

more seelies

more seelies

[btsmutimagines]

high stakes. (M)

Finally finished phew

Yes, I’m a hoe for blue haired Taehyung leave me alone

Word Count: 8.1k (oof)

Warnings: Light spanking? Oral (giving/recieving), dirty talk, Taehyung

V.

The 22nd letter of the alphabet to some, to others he was a powerful man. A man who pulled the strings of his many associates that obeyed every command. He was a mysterious figure, a man whose face hasn’t been seen by many but very few described him.

Some say he’s a foreigner that settled in Seoul, on the run from the international authorities. Some say he was a tall muscular man who used to be a hitman before chasing his ventures. Some say V wasn’t even a man at all, but a woman.

You didn’t know the truth behind V either, opting out of the rumour mill that clouded the name. It wouldn’t help you anyhow as you were a mere gambler, spending parts of your paycheck on roulette and the occasional slot machine. You liked playing against dealers, calculating every move that you could make and the rush when you make a small payout from a simple game.

Gambling can be beautiful; the sweet taste of victory could overwhelm the senses and lead to people scrambling for any cash on them to keep playing. You could watch desperate men begging for a rematch, screaming that they had to be cheating because there was no way they could lose.

Of course, you knew they’re being outplayed by the dealer, but the addiction eroded their ability to see their reality.

You haven’t gone off the deep end yet but tonight, you were feeling lucky.

You walked over to a table, a game just about to start and took the empty seat in the middle. You made eye contact with the dealer, Hongjoong, he was rarely on shift here. Made you wonder what the occasion was.

“Count me in.”

“Ah, Miss Y/N, you look lovely tonight.”

“Thank you. It’s been a while since I last saw you.” You rested your head on top of your hands as your elbows sat on the edge of the table.

“Been busy, you know how it is. How much?”

“I’m feeling 75 tonight.”

“Alright.” You placed your stack down, along with the others and watched the pit boss walk over and counts the cash. Your lovely stack of chips was placed in front of you as Hongjoong started dealing the cards.

You quietly watched, glancing at everyone’s cards and he finally dealt himself a card. 13, huh.

Hongjoong had a 10. The man to your right had an ace and a six, a hand you had to watch out for.

He started from the left, the first two chose to stand, you hit, Hongjoong dealt you a card, giving you a 7 and you stood. All you needed was the cards to fall as they may, you had the upper hand here.

You grinned to yourself as the other members of the table reluctantly pushed their stacks towards you.

“Another round, Miss?”

“I can’t see why not.” New faces joined, none that you bothered to concern yourself with. After all, all you had to do was win.

And win, you did.

With all the chips you had, you could build yourself a castle and no player around you were none the wiser.

“Count me in.” You heard, a man saying close to your ear as he took the empty seat next to you. He felt cold, the room dropping a few degrees as he spoke. Any weak-willed player would back out instantly, but you were more than that.

Besides, you could remember the last time you came close to a man as pretty as he was. Dare you to say, he might just be as pretty as you.

“Ah, I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” A man spoke, one that just lost a round to you. Sore loser.

“Anyone that plays a round with her loses.”

“I bet she’s cheating.” Tch. You shoot the man a glare, him retreating and you heard a chuckle.

“I don’t remember asking for advice, especially from a man who just lost.”

“Dealer, I’m betting double of what she’s got.”

“S-sir.”

“You hear me clearly, don’t you?”

“Yes, sir.” Has Hongjoong ever stutter like that?

“And who might you be, Miss?” He took your hand, bringing it to his lips and you stared in shock. His pinstriped suit fit him perfectly, his dress shirt unbuttoned enough to give you a peek at his defined collarbones.

Taking in the image of him staring at you almost knocked you off your seat. Is it possible for a man to be this handsome or was it the trick of the light?

No, you mustn’t be swayed by his appearance. It was a ploy to play with your focus, all that matters is dealing a blow to his confidence. And that starts with your next words.

“The woman who is about to win.”

“Is that so? I like that response.”

“You want to lose?”

“I never lose.”

“We’ll see about that.”

“Start the game, dealer.” The man said, not taking an eye off you and Hongjoong began to deal out cards.

You noted the cards of those around you, making sure to stand when you were sure that you had this in the bag. Despite the man sitting next to you, you still had no clue to what he could have.

You briefly glanced at him, meeting his ominous eyes for a moment and quickly looked away. It felt like he was reading you, opening up parts of you that you purposely kept hidden with the blink of his eye.

As if the more you walled off, the more he broke down with such ease.

It was unnerving, to say the least.

“Stand.”

“Stand.” He parroted, you scoffed. You placed your cards down, having yourself a lovely 19 and glanced around the table until your eyes landed on the cards of the man next to you.

A perfect 21.

“Would you look at that? A Blackjack.” You watched as the chips were pushed his way. His smirk at you mocked you as you received your wager.

“It was nice playing with you, Miss. Hope we meet again sometime.” He threw a wink at the end, taking his earnings with him and you only watched him walk away with the last word.

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

You stabbed your salad, taking a large bite and chewing to yourself. So maybe the thought of that man stewed in your mind longer than you thought. His domineering presence lingered around you like a cloud, making you wish for clear skies.

Those handsome features were distorted by his supercilious attitude, it was a shame.

“Uh oh, who’s next on your hit list? Is it Lisa again?”

“No, but she’s still on thin ice.”

“I hope you’re joking about that.” Your friend, Soyou laughed as she took the seat in front of you.

“And if I wasn’t?”

“Then, HR.”

“Those clowns? They would make me write an apology letter and call it a day.”

“Police?”

“It was a joke, So, I didn’t think you would turn on me like that.”

“So, now it’s a joke?” You took another bite of your salad, smiling at her and she rolled her eyes at you.

“So, what’s really on your mind?”

“There was a man…”

“Was he handsome?”

“Does it matter?”

“I mean hot guys can pretty much get away with anything.”

“You mean, hot, rich guys do. Wait, that’s not the point!”

“Hey, his hotness is a factor in this.”

“How so?”

“Since he’s stirring you up this much, he’s at least pretty.”

“It wasn’t that kind of encounter.”

“Then?”

“He beat me at Blackjack.”

“He’s a dealer?”

“No, he was a player at the table.”

“I thought blackjack was between you and the dealer?”

“It is but I’m usually the one to win my wager in my rounds and this man defied that.”

“And? Did you lose?”

“No.”

“So, why does it matter?”

“Because.”

“Y/N, you need to use your words, honey.”

“Because he smirked at me as he did. Like he knew that he would win his bet regardless of the outcome of me winning my wager or not.”

“Again, why does that matter?”

“I have a reputation to upkeep there, the Weeper they call me.”

“Weeper?”

“Because any man who plays in any game with me is bound to weep.”

“Makes you sound like a villain, you know. Some of these men are gambling their livelihoods.”

“Then, they’ve already lost.” Soyou opened her mouth to say something but closed it, resorting to eating her lunch as you finished yours.

You knew how cold you sounded but those words were a truth that not many wanted to admit.

You’ve seen it with your own eyes.

And who were you to do anything about it? You were a simple office worker who always had time to kill after work. Maybe you could be like others who drink with co-workers or spend night binging Netflix’s extensive catalogue but you like the thrill.

Watching on bated breath as you gambled, whether it was slots, roulette, poker. As long as Lady Luck was on your side, who could stop you?

So once again, you slipped into one of your nicer gowns, your fanciest heels and strutted into the casino.

The atmosphere was to your liking, fewer people than normal but the stacks seemed higher.

“Ah, why isn’t the young Miss from the other night?”

“Oh, it’s you.” As if he came to ruin your mood, the man appears. He wore a slick white suit this time, the flaps as black as the colour of his hair and you crossed your arms.

“Not quite the reaction I would have liked, to be truthful.”

“What makes you believe I would be happy to see you?”

“Why, I can tell you can’t get me out of your mind at least. Whether it’s out of hate or love doesn’t matter.”

“You’re such a strange man.”

“Oh?”

“Why would you remember me?”

“Why wouldn’t I? After all, you’re the woman they call the Weeper. Is that not true?”

“Is that so?”

“Being coy, aren’t we? I thought it was because one look at your face would make a grown man cry.”

“Very funny.”

“But seeing how beautiful you are, it must be your skill.” He tilted your chin; you slapped his hand away and began walking past him.

“Don’t mock me.” You spat, him making no haste to catch up to you.

“I mean not to, Miss. I was merely intrigued by your reputation. The Weeper, enemy of men.”

“You make me sound like a villain.”

“Only repeating the rumours. And yet you were no match for me.”

“We weren’t competing.”

“Au contraire, bunny, I ruined your perfect streak, did I not? Any man who plays against you is bound to lose his wager. Yet I have not.”

“You’re just an irregularity. That’s all.”

“Sounds like you can’t accept your losses.”

“Now, you’re taunting me.”

“Does it sound like that?” He grabbed your wrist, pulling you against the side of a slot machine and you squirmed.

“Want to make a bet?” Those words, spoken as if they were a spell meant to enchant you led you to a roulette table. The dealer of the table looked nervous as the two of you had placed your bets and he smirked at you.

Gosh, how you’ve grown to hate that look in a short amount of time.

Best two out of three, you reminded yourself. If you won, it would mean his win was just an off round. If he wins, he wanted something from you. You tried to press him from more than ‘something’, but he wouldn’t budge beyond that.

Just two wins and you can watch his smirk be washed away.

Roulette was a game of luck and chance, still, you were up against the odds as you glanced at where you placed your chips.

“No more bets.” The dealer spun the wheel, dropping the ball as it joined the wheel in spinning before it landed in its spot.

“31, black.”

“That’s mine, isn’t it?”

“You sure do like to gloat.”

“Because it winds you up so perfectly, I can’t wait to unravel it all myself.”

“You talk as if something were going to happen between me and you.”

“I’m just going to have to get something will.” You regret agreeing to this stupid bet for a moment, it’s becoming clear to you that the game you were actually playing had nothing to do with the spinning roulette table.

“14, red.” You held back a grin, settling for giving him a look before turning your eyes back to the table.

If you could wish on all your lucky stars for this to land on any number you bet on, you did. After a silent prayer, you waited for the dealer’s words.

“21, red.”

“Oh, isn’t that ironic? Isn’t that where we first met?”

“Fuck you.”

“I wish you would, bunny.”

“Forget this.” You got up from the table, the man reaching for your wrist again and you cursed as he gripped hard. Would he just leave you alone?

“Now, bunny, you made a bet with me. Isn’t the honourable thing to do to fulfill your end of it?”

“Isn’t you winning enough for you? You have bragging rights now, just satisfy yourself with that.”

“No. I don’t need that.”

“Then, what is it? Spit it out.”

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

You stuffed your head in a pillow as Soyou sat on the edge of your bed.

“He asked you out?”

“I don’t understand this man at all. One minute, he’s taunting me, the next he’s flirting with me. Is he a sadist?”

“Wouldn’t it make you a masochist for going out with him?”

“Who said I was going?”

“Weren’t you the one going on about reputations?”

“Well, that’s tainted now. So, it doesn’t matter anymore.”

“But, aren’t you at least curious about him?”

“And why would I be?”

“He’s hot from how you described him, he’s rich since he can gamble his life away so easily and he gambled like you, so there’s a shared interest between you two. Hey, if you snag him, you could just use him to gamble for you. It’ll be a definite win.”

“So, he’s probably toying with me-” You heard your phone vibrate next to you, raising it to wake and seeing a message.

Hey, bunny, dress casually and don’t be late. I don’t like waiting.

“He calls you a pet name already?”

“I don’t even know why he calls me that either. Makes me want to punch him square in the nose.”

“Well, don’t. It’ll ruin the atmosphere of the date.”

“I’m not going!”

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

You spoke too soon when you got to the address that he gave you, seeing it was a café. Soyou dragged you out of bed, essentially forcing you into going. She even dared to slip a condom in your purse as if you were going to use it. And with him, of all people.

“You came?”

“Expecting to get stood up?”

“I see you’re sharp as ever, bunny.”

“I have an actual name, you know.”

“Which you have yet to tell me if you haven’t noticed.”

“Y/N. Yours?”

“Taehyung.”

“Hm, your name means ‘all wishes will come true’ huh? Explains your ridiculous luck.”

“Didn’t know you were into things like that.”

“No, I just need something to explain how I lost to you twice.”

“You should let that go, it’s not good for your health, Y/N.” You rolled your eyes, opening the door to the café and seeing a rabbit hopping in front of you.

“Look, it’s your kind.”

“Very funny, Taehyung.”

“But it’s so cute.” He scooped one into his arms, petting it and you watched as it melted under his touch.

“Don’t worry, I can give you head pats too.” He petted your head, his large hand felt warm, but you were annoyed by the casual skinship.

“Ah, thank you customer for catching him! He managed to get out.” A staff member bowed to the two of you and took the rabbit from Taehyung.

“I felt a bond forming with him.”

“You can go out with him instead if you’d like?”

“And miss the chance to spend an afternoon with a beautiful woman? I think he can wait.”

“How many women have you fed that line to?”

“I never had a woman competing with a rabbit before so, none?”

“I’m not competing-”

“It’s okay, Y/N, I’m joking. Let’s order?” He asked, you walked up to the counter with him and ordering your lunch.

You glanced at the rabbits, making eye contact with a small brown rabbit. He hopped close to his gate, you crouched in front and paused. You weren’t quite sure how to approach a rabbit.

A staff member opened his gate for you, letting the little creature hop out and you stayed still.

“You have to show him your hand, bit off to the side so he can see it.” Taehyung was crouched next to you as you followed his instructions.

“Okay.” He began to sniff your hand, you allowed him until he got closer to you.

“I think he wants to go pet him. Go for the cheeks.” You nodded, stroking his cheek and he closed his eyes. It felt like he nuzzled into your touch as you continued to pet him, and you smiled.

“I had no idea you were well versed in rabbits.”

“My grandparents had a farm, they kept rabbits. I can still remember getting nipped by one of the dominant ones.”

“Did it hurt?”

“A bit, he had a nasty bite. But I learned.”

“What else did they have?”

“The usual, chickens and cows. Gramps grew apples and oranges too. When I was born, my grandparents planted an apple tree that day. Every summer, I would check on it and see it grew taller than me.”

“You were competing with a tree, Taehyung.”

“It’s silly but I hate to lose.”

“You were bound to.”

“Unfortunately.” You laughed, Taehyung giving you an incredulous look.

“I pour part of my life story to you and you laugh.”

“Because it’s hard to imagine you competing with nature of all things. Don’t tell me you marked it in your house too?”

“And what if I did?”

“Then, you’re stranger than I thought. Acting all seductive and dominant when you’re a big softie.”

“If I were that one dimensional, that would be boring as fuck. After all, being a one-trick pony wouldn’t let me win, would it?”

“Spoken like a true gambler.”

“Even now, I’m making a wager.”

“On what?”

“Well, it’s not fun if I tell you.”

“Couldn’t let go of the teasing, huh?”

“Of course not, bunny.” You rolled your eyes, getting up as your order was called. The two of you carried your food to an empty table, the meal you ordered was in the shape of a rabbit. A sandwich neatly cut into one with a side of fries.

“That’s oddly perfect.”

“I mean it is the Tokki café, Taehyung.”

“To get the ears so perfectly matched.”

“You’re oddly fascinated by this.”

“Are you not?”

“More curious about you.”

“I like the sound of t-” You stuffed a bite of your sandwich in his mouth, you watched him chewing said bite.

“I thought we start feeding each other on the fourth date at the earliest.”

“I guess we’re moving fast.”

“Mhm.” It was the only thing he mustered, beginning to eat his meal as you ate yours. You patted a napkin around your mouth, careful to not smudge your lipstick and Taehyung kept his eyes on you.

“If you have something to say, you can say it. I don’t think I have telepathy.”

“Just thinking about how I can make this day longer.”

“Did you read some pick-up artist books before coming here?”

“Tch, those books are just for desperate people who can’t flirt.”

“Who knows, maybe they’ll teach you about subtlety.”

“Subtlety? I know what I want and go after it, simple.”

“And if it doesn’t work?”

“I don’t give up if that’s what you’re asking.” Of course, a man like him would chase until the very end. You met him at a casino for goodness sake. A place where people can put up their homes, cars, livelihoods for a chance to win.

Why would he be any different?

“Unless I know for sure there’s no chance. I also don’t like wasting my time, Y/N.”

“Neither do I.”

“Then, let’s go.”

“Where are we going?”

“You’ll see.” You jogged to catch up with him, stopping when he got in front of a rather expensive car.

“Ladies first.” He opened the passenger door, you hesitated before getting in and he got into the driver seat a few moments later.

“This isn’t where you drive me to some unknown fields and kill me or something.”

“We’re downtown, Y/N, also I’m not from here. So, if anything, we’re more likely to get lost in the city.”

“And you don’t have a GPS.”

“Got one in here.” He pointed to his head and you groaned. Is this a common trait amongst men? You still remember ending up three towns over from where you lived when your high school boyfriend wanted to take you to some cool restaurant. Your mother never let you hear the end of it, she still brings up when you called her now and then.

“Oh, great.” You remarked.

After dealing with some traffic, he parked in front of an arcade.

“A change of pace.”

“Right.” The two of you walked in together, him paying the entrance fee and you two entering the hall. The large room was filled with games, the place was mostly filled with teens and kids running around to different games.

“Come on.” He took your hand, pulling you into the direction of a racing game and taking a seat.

“At least you can’t crash this car.”

“Hey, I just like getting to places in the fastest time possible.”

“I felt like my face was going to fly off like it does in cartoons.”

“You should star in a soap opera, really good at being dramatic.”

“I’m just surprised you haven’t lost your licence.” You said as you took the seat next to his, gripping the steering wheel and entered the game.

“It helps with racing games.”

“Does it now?”

“Wanna test it?” You cocked an eyebrow, pressing start and began racing against Taehyung. The two of you were focused on beating the other that you hadn’t noticed the kids that just boosted his way to first place while you two got second and third respectively.

“How?”

“Tae, it’s okay to lose sometimes.”

“You’re only saying that because you got second, but me getting third?”

“Aw, sweetie, I can get you some ice cream to make you feel better.”

“You’re having fun with this, aren’t you?”

“Do you want the ice cream or not?”

“Yes.” The two of you ordered ice cream in a cup, you ordered chocolate chip cookie dough while Taehyung had rocky road.

“Let me have a bite.”

“Fine.” He stole your next bite, giving you a wink as he licked his lips.

“Taehyung.”

“It’s too sweet. Here.” He handed you another spoon, you gleefully took it and finished off your ice cream.

You played a few more games, most of them resulting in a tie or Taehyung winning. You didn’t mind much, having fun watching Taehyung’s competitive nature but making sure you were still enjoying yourself. He drove you home, you sat in the passenger seat with your bottom lip caught between your teeth.

“Can I see you again?” You got out of the car, Taehyung opening the door for you and you leaned against the car door as he spoke.

“Maybe.”

“I’ll take it. Good night, Y/N.”

“Good night, Taehyung.”

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

Soyou came over for a girl’s night, her letting herself feel at home while you gathered the snacks.

“What’s with all the flowers?”

“Oh, he sent them…” You felt your face grow hot; Taehyung has been sending them after every date since your first. They were always the prettiest bunch; no bouquet was the same as the other and the latest was a bouquet of red camellias.

“What are they?”

“Red Camellias.” You placed down the tray of snacks, taking a bite of a cookie after you replied.

“Do you know what that means?”

“That he has a romantic side to him.”

“Oh, sweet child, do you not know about floriography?”

“Do I know what?”

“The language of the flowers, Y/N. Red camellias mean ‘You’re the flame of my heart’.”

“Flowers have meanings? Can’t they just be pretty?”

“What, they can’t multi-task now? Has he sent you others?”

“Yellow tulips, some Primroses, Alyssum, red roses, of course, and I think red chrysanthemums.”

“And you thought nothing of it.”

“Well, not all of us think of flowers like you.”

“Blame my florist mother. Anyways, the tulips mean your smile is like sunshine, primroses, alyssum mean worth beyond beauty, red roses and red chrysanthemums mean I love you and primroses mean I can’t live without you.”

“W-what? Really?”

“Girl, your man is speaking sweet nothings to you with flowers and you’re questioning it?”

“I mean he could have just sent them because they’re pretty.”

“Or that he’s madly in love with you.”

“It’s only been a few dates. Besides we haven’t done anything.”

“Do you have a photo?”

“What?’

“I need a photo of him.” You looked through your photos, choosing a random one and Soyou snatched your phone.

“What is wrong with you, Y/N?”

“Uh, nothing.”

“You have the hottest man alive and you haven’t banged him at least once?” She shrieked; you covered your ears a bit at the increased pitch.

“I don’t just put out.”

“in any other situation, I would applaud you, but this guy could bag a whole nightclub, guys and girls included. You sure you want to keep him on his toes?”

“If he wanted sex, he can hire an escort.”

“I admire your strength, Y/N.” You rolled your eyes, finishing off your cookie and scrolling through Netflix. You settled on a rom-com that Soyou raved about, staring to fall asleep partway through when the main characters had a stupid misunderstanding.

“Past bedtime, huh?”

“If I remember correctly,” a yawn escaping your lips mid-sentence before you continued, “you’re the older one here.”

“The movie wasn’t that boring.”

“I beg to differ. Will give a review in the morning, night.” Soyou rolled her eyes at you, got a tired laugh from you before the two of you went to bed in the living room.

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

You woke up, the sheets next to you empty and someone was knocking at your door. Rubbing the sleep of out of your eyes, you walked to the front door and was met with flowers in your face.

“Special delivery.”

“Tae?”

“Your one and only.” He lowered the flowers to reveal his smiling face, making you smile in return.

“Wasn’t expecting to see you until Friday.”

“I missed you, bunny.” He swiftly kissed your cheek as he stepped inside your apartment, the simple gesture making your heart skip a beat.

“Plus, I wanted to meet the famous Soyou.”

“I wonder where she went.”

“Her shoes are still here.” You checked the bathroom, seeing her not there either and going into your bedroom. On the side table was a note?

“Bunny?”

“In the bedroom.” You replied, Taehyung jogging in and peered over your shoulder.

“Someone took So, thinking it was me? Why would anyone do this?”

“It’s because of me.”

“Tae…?”

“I’m so sorry, bunny. But please leave this to me.” He started to rush out the room, you followed him until you got close enough to grab his arm.

“I’m going with you.”

“Y/N, you can’t.”

“She’s my best friend, Tae. I don’t want to lose you either, no matter how annoying you are sometimes.” He chortled at the last bit

“I’ll protect you both, I promise.” He sealed his words with a kiss to your forehead.

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

“Bunny, whatever you do, don’t leave the car.”

“Okay.” Yeah, right. Taehyung caressed your cheek before he left, taking the time between him entering the building before getting out yourself. You sneaked in, seeing Taehyung standing in front of a woman? Getting closer, you eavesdropped on their conversation.

“You really are a fool, V.”

V? He’s V?

“Am I? Coming to my territory, hiding in my turf and having the nerve to taking my woman? You should be thankful I came here and not my men. I’m afraid they aren’t as charitable as I am.” A cold chill ran down your spine as if someone slid an ice cube down your back. His voice was cold, calculated as if he was drained of any emotion besides silent rage.

“Where is she?”

“Aw, now you put away the venom. She really has you wrapped around her finger.” The woman came close to Taehyung, having the gull to touch his jaw with a wicked smile on her lips.

Is this the world Taehyung lives in?

“Beg. I want to hear the great V pathetically beg for his little girlfriend’s life.” You saw him get down on his knees, you could tell he was gritting his teeth as he spat his next words.

“Please. She’s innocent to the life I lead, someone I should have never tainted with my cursed soul. Let her go, I’m begging you. It’s me you wanted anyways.”

“Bring her out.” You watched as a man carried a passed out Soyou, her face covered in soot and her clothes tattered. What did they do to her?

“Looks like I clipped your little angel’s wings. But don’t worry, she’s still breathing.”

“I’m so sorry they did this to you. I-“

“Sorry to interrupt your little monologue but I’m here for a deal.”

“What?” He barked, the coldness was back.

“Oh, you can’t get all prickly with me. I kept her alive, didn’t I? Killing her would give me pleasure but I want more than that.”

“What is it?”

“I want the White Rabbit.” White Rabbit? What is that?

“You talk big, don’t you?”

“I’m a woman with ambitions, V. After all, is this woman not worth as much?”

“Let me think about it.” He crossed his finger behind his back, was that a signal to someone? To answer your question, you heard a volley of gunshots. You shut your eyes tight, covering your ears as the shots rang out and you tried to sneak back out the building. You hurriedly got in the car, your heart racing as you sat.

He had a shooter hidden in the building already? Was this common for him? You didn’t see him flinch as the shooting started, still as a statue.

“Miss Y/N?”

“Who are you?”

“A friend of V, miss. He has instructed that I take you home.”

“Where’s my friend? She was in there-”

“I know you’re scared but Mr. V will take care of it.”

“No-” You tried to open the door, the handle not budging as the man drove you off.

“What the fuck? You know kidnapping is a fucking crime, right?”

“I’ve done worse, Miss.” Your eyes widen at his statement, quickly giving up on resisting the man. He claims to be a friend of Taehyung who is also the infamous V. If the gunfire you heard was evidence of the people who were his friends, it would be wiser to cooperate.

He stopped in front of your building, you quickly got out and the man rolled down the window to leave with one thought.

“He always keeps his promise.”

Those words took root in your mind as you waited for a response from Soyou. It had been a week since you last saw her, trying to pretend that you weren’t desperately missing her. Just a simple phone is all you wished for.

You just remember seeing Taehyung take her phone before the two of you set out for her. If it didn’t work out, would he just make her disappear? The thought was disrupted by your phone loudly ringing and you answered without a second thought.

“Soyou? Are you alright?”

“Bunny. She’s at the Memorial Hospital, room 2305.” You heard his voice instead, your throat suddenly drying up and you just murmured an okay before hanging up.

You were running down the hall to the annoyance of a few nurses until you opened the door to her room.

“Soyou?”

“Y/N!”

“I was so worried.” You cried, tears already welling in your eyes before you could think and held her hand.

“Psh. I’m a lot tougher than I look, you know.”

“It didn’t hurt that I had a gorgeous man waiting on me hand and foot.” You looked back to where Soyou was staring, looking at Taehyung who shied away from eye contact. Has he been here the whole time?

“The nurses totally thought we were dating until I set them straight.”

“I’m too bad for you anyways.”

“Please, you carried up this huge teddy bear because I said Y/N liked them.”

“Soyou!” Taehyung snapped, Soyou giggling at his blushing face. You stayed silent, glancing at the bear that sat on the side table.  The two of them bickered some more, you quietly excuse yourself to take a breather.

Wrapping your head around Taehyung being who he is. It was mind-numbing, to say the least, but seeing him acting so jovial, so carefree when he can speak so coldly, be so callous and stood still as he basically orders someone to kill.

His life was much more than yours was, a life where him getting close to someone meant they were dragged into it whether they know about it or not. That should have been you in that hospital gown, spending a week in a hospital because you fell for a man with secrets. Secrets that are enough to cost you your life.

It’s shameful how you managed to show your face to Soyou when it’s your fault she’s here in the first place. What a horrible friend you are.

“It���s not your fault.” You looked up to see Taehyung standing in front of you and you turned away from him.

“I know you saw, Kai told me you did.”

“If I knew who you were, I would have never… Soyou wouldn’t be like this.”

“I know. It’s my fault, this is just more sins I should atone for. Getting Soyou hurt, putting you in danger, hurting you in the process. I don’t think a universe filled with I’m sorry would be enough for everything I’ve done. But I am still sorry about it.”

“Taehyung. Please.”

“I made a promise to protect you. Even if it means we never meet again, I’m going to keep my word, bunny.”

“Listen, Taehyung.”

“I’m sorry.” He bowed to you before walking off. You wanted to call out to him, give him a piece of your mind for not letting you speak and saying everything that you’ve been wanting to say since you last saw him but you could make two steps before he was out of your sight.

It’s always the last words with him, huh.

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

You helped Soyou get to her house, driving her house as she was discharged two weeks after your first visit. Taehyung vanished like a shadow, you never heard a word from him since. You kept it that way, putting your energy into rebuilding your life again.

“Did you and Tae have a fallout?”

“What?”

“Y/N, I can see that lovelorn kind of look on your face. It’s been like that for the past 2 weeks, it’s kind of sickening really.”

“Lovelorn, So? I’m not in love.”

“Please. Don’t try to fool me, I’ve watched too many romantic movies to know the situation we’re in. You blame yourself for what happened, and you don’t want Taehyung around because he’s a reminder of it.”

“Even if that’s true?”

“Then, you’re an idiot.”

“Gee, and I was trying to be a good best friend.”

“So am I. I’m not going to let my best friend miss her chance at happiness. You don’t have to punish yourself for me, I’ve forgiven you for worse things.”

“Like what?”

“Letting me wear white after Arbour day.” You looked at her for a minute, gauging how serious she was before bursting out into laughter.

“Seriously.” You said, Soyou laughing with you.

“But seriously, get your butt in gear. We have to transform you into a woman that Tae can’t keep his hands off of. A femme fatale, in simple words.”

“Soyou? What did you plan?”

“Just go with it.”

“Isn’t that what you said to me about Taehyung the first time?”

“Oh shut it, you’re in love with him now.”

“Am not.” You sassed, Soyou rolling her eyes as she pushed you into her bedroom.

“Let me work my magic.”

───✱*.｡:｡✱*.:｡✧*.｡✰*.:｡✧*.｡:｡*.｡✱ ───

Soyou led you out the door, you saw the man from that day bowing. His name was Kai, wasn’t it?

“Miss Y/N, Miss Soyou.”

“Is this part of your plan?”

“Of course. Plus seeing Kai in a suit is a little bonus for me.” You saw her wink at him to which he coughed to cover up the fact he was blushing.

“Do you realize what you’re getting into?”

“I don’t mind playing with little fire, Y/N.”

“Okay, I’m leaving before you start with bedroom eyes.” You got into the car, Kai hopping into the driver’s seat.

“Are you at least going to tell me where we’re going?”

“I’m afraid not, Miss. V wants you to be blindfolded even.”

“Still wants to keep secrets, huh.”

“May I?”

“Go ahead.” The cotton scarf felt soft around your face as a knot was skillfully tied behind your head. You sat in anticipation, anxious about what this plan Soyou devised entails. The car finally stopped and you heard someone else open the door, you blindly taking their hand.

“I’ll lead the way.” You could only follow, holding onto an arm and walking up to what you believed was an elevator from the ding you heard. He led you in, the time you’re spending only making you more nervous.

“It’ll be alright, Miss.”

“I hope so.”

“Miss Soyou really cares about you as does V, even though he tries his best to hide it. I could dare say he loves you.” You thought you heard rustling but you dismissed as your nerves talking.

“But I can see that you both care for each other from how Miss Soyou describes you both.” Note to self: Give Soyou a piece of your mind next time.

“Ah, we’re here.” You followed, walking down a corridor and heard a door click.

“I can take it from here.” You pushed the blindfold up, seeing you holding onto Taehyung.

“You were there since I got out of the car, weren’t you?”

“You noticed.”

“For Kai to suddenly smell like your cologne was a dead giveaway, Taehyung.”

“I’m too good for the cheap one he buys.” You rolled your eyes, letting go of him and taking a few steps back.

You bit your lip, fighting the smile that threatened to show. Was it always this easy for him to toy with you like this?

“He was right, Kai I mean. About me loving you.”

“Taehyung.”

“I’m sorry. I know these aren’t the words you want to hear. Not from me, at least.” He’s still there. That goofball that stumbles on his words, teases you constantly and has more cheesy lines than a cheese factory.

“Are you willing to listen to what I have to say? Whatever it is.” He took a seat, you stayed standing.

“Yes.” You gave him a look, him nervously scratching his neck and you took a deep breath.

“I missed you. The part of you that you showed me, even when you rattled me up into some stupid bets. But when I saw you there, how emotionless you were, I was afraid. Afraid of V. Like everyone else was. Seeing you at the hospital confused me too because I thought it was all an act. That cold man is who you should be.” You looked him in the eyes, knowing that he wouldn’t say a word until he knew you were done.

“But I know it’s not. I feel it in my heart, that smile you give me, those flowers you sent me… It was all real. So I want to accept you, all of you.” You sat in his lap, cupping his cheek before pressing your lips against his.

You kept it brief, gently pulling away and resting your forehead on his.

“Give me everything, Taehyung.” You whispered, Taehyung taking his turn to kiss you. It was more passionate as if he were pouring his heart into every movement of his lips against yours.

Yet it was hot, his tongue playing with you smoothly as he kissed you deeply. His hands found your zipper, the dress giving him no resistance and it pooled in his lap.

“You’re so beautiful.” He murmured against your skin, pressing kisses along your neck. You made work of his shirt, revealing his chest as he played with your nipples through your bra.

You let out a moan to his pleasure, you began to ground your hips against him. A groan gave you the push to keep going, changing the rhythm your hips followed.

“Shit. Bunny.”

“Hm? What is it, Taehyung?”

“Don’t play coy, baby. I’m not afraid to punish you tonight.”

“Don’t act all tough with me, I know you’re wrapped around my finger.”

“Is that so?”

“Prove me wrong then.” A sardonic smile was on his face, knowing that he hated to lose. He took you to the bed, your back hitting the mattress hard while his hands rest on either side of your head.

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” He muttered against your lips, roughly taking your lips. His hands were more callous while touching you, ridding you of your underwear with one hand as if it were a simple task.

His hand dipped between your legs, crudely finding your clit and rubbing fast circles.

“No bite now, bunny? You’re wet enough to soak the sheets.”

“Rich coming from the man who’s hard as a rock.” You pressed your knee against his crotch, rubbing it through his dress pants.

“I’d be crazy if I wasn’t. Hearing you shamelessly moan my name while I pound you into the mattress, gripping the sheets hopelessly. Begging for more like the horny little bunny you are.”

“Don’t even bother to deny it, your pussy is soaking my fingers as we speak.”

“You’re a dirty man.”

“And you love it, Y/N.” He dipped down, moving his body down the bed and pushing your legs up and open for him.

You wouldn’t have the chance to speak, his tongue quickly pressed against your cunt. It took everything in you to stop salacious sounds from escaping your lips but a quick swirl of his tongue on your clit opened them like Pandora’s box.

The long strokes of his tongue alternated with short licks before you felt it enter you. Embarrassment flushed you as you heard wet sounds each time he dipped his tongue in. Soon his fingers would replace his tongue, two entering you without much.

“I want to hear more. Come on.” He smacked your thigh, eliciting a whimper from you. His thumb played with your clit as his fingers pumped fast and deep. You knew he had experience under his belt with looks like his but you were already a mess so early on.

“Show me more of that expression, bunny. I want to see how you look when you come.” He pressed on further, his fingers finding your g-shot and your clit beginning to feel overstimulated.

“Come for me.” You arched your back, toes curling and he pumped his finger while you rode out your high.

“Good girl.” You looked at him, licking his fingers clean and you sat up.

“Let me return the favour.” You said, reaching for his belt and he helped you reveal his dick. From grinding earlier, you figured he was above average but he was more than you imagined.

“You can’t intimidate my cock into getting harder by staring, you know.”

“Sorry. Just admiring.”

“Carry on.”

“Dick.”

“Funny.”

“Can be when I want to be.” You positioned him to lie down, gripping the shaft and begin slow twisting pumps, using your spit to lubricate before sinking your mouth around him.

“Oh, fuck.” You found a pace that made him twitch in your mouth, milking delicious grunts and growls from him in the process. His hands tangled in your hair as if he were controlling your pace but the loose grip let you know you were really in control.

“Shit, slow down.” You let him out of your mouth, still pumping him and licking your lip.

“Let me get a condom.” He looked through the drawer next to the bed, you took the chance to smack his ass to which he shot you a glance.

“What, you have nice cheeks.”

“So do you. Would look real nice with my handprints.”

“Want to test that?”

“Such a naughty bunny.” He retorted, flipping you on your stomach. His shins rested on the mattress on either side of your legs, one hand gripping his dick as the other held you still.

“Please, Tae. I want to feel you.” He plunged into you, the thick girth making you gasp as he slowly entered you.

“Are you okay, bunny? Does it hurt?” He pressed delicate kisses along your shoulder blades, trying to keep still until you spoke.

“I’m alright, Tae, you can move.” You breathed out.

Taehyung kept true to his word, only giving you a few slow strokes before he began his merciless thrusts. Your butt jiggled with each thrust, his hand periodically giving slaps to each cheek.

“Fuck, Taehyung.” You mewled out, unable to say more as he drilled into you. The delectable stretch you felt with each thrust numbed your mind as you felt your cunt set ablaze.

Your body grew hot, sweat forming all over your body and you could only vocalize sounds of pleasure. Taehyung’s grunts only made you wetter, allowing him to slide into your further and drive you even crazier.

“Love the way you clench -nng around me, bunny.”

“Gonna mould this pussy into the shape of my cock, do you want that, huh?”

“Fuck, please- ng. Hnng.” He slapped your ass in response, changing his pace and slid almost out of you before slamming himself back in.

“T-tae.” No words left his lips, only loud growls and grunts with the new rhythm he followed.

You cried out as one odd thrust made you come again and he kept going. Changing his pace again, his dick was perfectly angled to your g-spot and you whined from the overstimulation.

You were losing your mind, was sex always this good or was it because of Taehyung? Taehyung wouldn’t allow you to dwell on the question, pulling you back to edge of another orgasm with his touch on your clit.

“Fuck.”

“Clench around me, bunny.” You did as he asked, a low groan in your ear as a reward before he began to sloppily thrust in you. He stopped, cursing as he finally came.

“Are you alright, bunny?”He pulled out, removing the condom as you two regained your breaths. He went into the bathroom, getting something.

“Yeah.” You responded as he re-entered the room, him carefully wiping the sweat off of you.

“Good, it’s time for round two.”

“Taehyung, we don’t have to fuck like rabbits, you know.”He chuckled at your response, getting next to you and you shielded your self with your arms.

“I meant cuddles, bunny.”

“Now, come here. I don’t ever want to let you go again.”

[dreamingofmilk]

can I get 3 with Erik? please

@alittlejd ! You were our first request, so thank you for submitting one! We had a lot of fun writing this one!

We hope you like it!

3. "Ok, but first kiss me."

Synopsis: Erik had a reputation of being a fuckboy. That meant you had to be careful around him. Guard your heart. It was a solid plan until he came in and ruined all your plans.

Word Count: 3,408

Warnings: cursing

You stared quietly at your friends as you approached them from the Uber you took to the state carnival. You cocked your head in confusion because their boyfriends were with them. And never once in the three weeks of planning this excursion did they mention bringing their fucking boyfriends. 

Of course, why would they, you were the only single one and they really wanted you there and they really wanted you to not feel left out. But how could you not feel left out? Each of your three best friends had their gorgeous boyfriends and you, well let’s just say your Friday nights had become super lonely. 

As you slowly approached them you noticed a guy standing off to the side awkwardly. You immediately recognized him as Tonya’s boyfriend James’ best friend Erik. 

Fuck Erik. 

Well… not literally… plenty of women have already done that and you weren't interested in being the next notch on his bedpost, as much as it seemed like he wanted to, and deep down, in a place you'll never acknowledge out loud, you wanted to. 

You meant fuck Erik in a what are you going to do kind of way. Erik was one of those heart stopping, stomach dropping, butterfly causing looking niggas and you struggled to deal with it. Especially because he made it a point to flirt with you incessantly whenever you were around each other. 

“Hey guys.” You hugged your friends Tonya and Fiona and their boyfriends James and Trey. You smiled with heated cheeks when Erik approached you with his arms spread open wide for a huge hug. Erik wrapped his arms around your waist tightly and bent down to whisper in your ear. 

“Missed you Bunny.” His subtle cologne fills your nose and it takes everything within you not to pant like a bitch in heat. You smiled politely at him and pulled away. Turning around to glare at your friends. 

“What the fuck!” You whisper harshly. They smile devilishly and wrap their arms around you while walking to the front entrance of the fair. 

“You’re always at the dorm girl, we had to get you out.” Tonya said as she stood in the long line. 

“I already agreed to come out with you guys. I wanna know why the fuck is he here!” You quickly glanced back at Erik only to find him shamelessly checking you out. He made eye contact with you and sent you a full on smile, unashamed of him eye fucking you. 

“You stay at home too much whenever we tell you he’ll be there. He likes you and it’s clear that you’ve been avoiding him.” Fiona mentioned. 

“So we figured that we would play Cupid AND have a great time.”

“What if I don’t like him like that.” You started, but your friends were not having it.

“Bullshit. We know your pussy gets a heartbeat whenever he’s around.” Tonya utters with annoyance in her tone. 

Your jaw drops at her vulgarity. She was right. But she didn't have to say it. 

“Now go have fun. Nothing has to come out of this. Just enjoy your time with him and we will all meet up in like two hours.” Fiona pushed you slightly towards Erik, while walking towards her man Trey. 

“Wait we aren’t going to walk around together?” You whisper back. 

“Uh...no.” Tonya uttered and pranced off with James. You watched in awe and shock as your friends left you standing next to the guy that made you fucking weak in the knees and crazy in the head, and he knew it. The longer you watched your friends walk away with their boyfriends. The more you realized that they set this up for the both of you. 

“So what do you want to do first, Bunny?” Erik looked down at you, his arms gesturing that he would buy your tickets for the fair as you approached the ticket booth and entrance. His nickname for you sent shivers down your spine. 

“I’m down for anything.” Erik smirked, licked his lips and stepped forward to buy your tickets.

“I’ll remember that.” You rolled your eyes at his stupidity. Erik shyly took your hand and led you toward your first ride. 

You rode two rides together and got matching henna tattoos, you were surprised when he agreed to get one with you in the same spot. Laughter bubbled up through your throat when he tickled you to distract you when the two of you went into a haunted house. His hands rested gently on your hips, following you slowly through the house of horrors.

The two of you ran out shrieking and giggling when Erik felt one of the actors accidentally brush up against him. 

You slowed down when you passed a booth with a giant stuffed elephant, your eyes big and wide as you stared wantingly. 

“You want it?” Erik asked. You took in your surroundings and noticed the elephant was for a basketball game. Maybe it was your height but you sucked at basketball. 

You slowly shook your head no and started walking ahead of him and away from the giant colorful elephant. 

“Come on bunny, if you want the elephant. I got you.” Erik grabbed you by your waist and pulled you back in front of the game. 

“How many girls have you done this for I wonder.” You muttered. Erik rolled his eyes and pulled out his wallet… again and paid the guy. He explained the game and passed Erik three balls. Erik looked back at you and gave you the sweetest smile. A fuckboy shouldn't be able to smile like that, it's disrespectful really. 

“Can I get a kiss for good luck?” You blushed and shook your head. No way! You weren't getting sucked into that trap.

“Damn, worth a shot.” Erik winked at you and turned back to the game. Crossing your arms in front of you, you sway back and forth watching Erik sink three balls easy. 

“Take your pick, bunny.” Erik smirked and turned towards you, his arms spread wide as if he wanted to offer you the world. He really did have game, no wonder so many girls have fawned over him.

You pointed meekly at your elephant and smiled brightly when Erik reached up and got it for you. 

“What are you going to name it?” Erik whispered in your ear. You shivered but smiled softly when he handed it to you. You loved it already.

“N’Jadaka.” You smirked at his shocked face and held back laughter. “Psych.” That was a close one. He looked so genuinely happy that you almost forgot who you were dealing with. You had to be careful. This guy could really hurt you if you got too close.

After winning your prize, Erik took you to the concession stands. "I'm starving. What do you want to eat?"

You shrugged, "I just want a corndog. I'm not really hungry." You were way too nervous to eat right now. It's a wonder you've managed to make it this far. But fate was a cruel ass bitch and you were her favorite victim. Right before Erik started to speak your stomach let out the loudest growl. Louder than anything you've ever heard before. Your eyes flew to the ground with a quickness and you shrunk into yourself, your face hot with embarrassment.

And Erik, the asshole was laughing his ass off. "Lying ass! Ain't no way you got ass and titties like that and you don't eat proper. I don't fuck with girls who don't eat. Makes absolutely no sense to me."

You hit his shoulder as hard as you could, but he didn't even seem to notice it, he didn't even flinch. "Oh, so you have a fetish?" You let a smirk form on your face, some light teasing will smooth over all this awkward energy.

Erik frowned, "What? Fuck no! Take that shit back right now."

"Look, I get it. Thick women are all the rage right now. Do you, buddy." You shook your head.

Erik moved in so quickly. One second you were staring at the back of his head as he walked in front of you and the next he was so close you could count the different flecks of brown in his eyes. You took a step back in shock, but he grabbed your waist and pulled you back. "First of all, don't ever say no shit like that to me again. I'm not like these weak minded niggas out here. I don't need a trend to tell me what I like. And I'm not your buddy. I'm not tryna be your friend, Y/N. I don't know how many times I need to say it."

“Ah, there he is. How many girls has that line worked on?" You smirked and rolled your eyes. 

Erik rolled his eyes, "I'm not a hoe, Y/N."

"Of course not.” You deadpanned.

You both agreed to split a corndog and a huge slice of pizza. You fought, but Erik insisted on paying for all of it and carrying it all to your table. You huffed as you sat down. 

"I could have paid for half, Erik."

He scoffed and scrunched his face, "What kind of weak nigga lets a girl pay for a date? You don't touch your wallet when you're with me Princess."

You couldn't lie, the way he said that, like you actually offended him by mentioning it at all, was a bit of a turn on. You never would have pegged Erik as that type of guy, he had fuckboy written all over him. 

While you were in your thoughts Erik cut the pizza and corndog in half and set up a plate for you. He reached across the table to set it in front of you. "Here you go, Bunny."

You just looked at him, the shock clear as day on your face. "Thank you. I didn't know you could act civilized." 

"There's a lot you don't know about me." He frowned.

You smirked, "I think I know enough." You took a bite of your corn dog and moaned quietly. There was something magical about fair food. It always tasted so much better than anything else. You heard a groan and opened your eyes to see Erik with a pained look on his face. "What's wrong with you?"

He laughed humorlessly and shook his head. "You’re killing me, Y/N." He leaned across the table and grabbed your face. You were so shocked you couldn't react, you just froze, your eyes wide. He slowly leaned in closer, like he was going to kiss you. Part of you was losing your shit and the rest of you waited with bated breath, the anticipation damn near killing you. Erik stared into your eyes, his own half lidded and seductive. After a beat, he wiped his thumb along the side of your mouth. 

"You had some mustard on your face, beautiful." Once your heart rate slowed down a bit, his words finally registered and you were pissed. There he goes playing with your feelings again. And you fell right into it. You looked over at him and he was holding in laughter. You hardened your glare and he laughed so hard he almost fell off the bench.

"Asshole." You muttered under your breath.

He worked hard to reign himself in, all that was left was the occasional snicker. "I couldn't resist. You're so cute when you're angry. Like a bunny."

You pouted and crossed your arms. "I hate you."

"You don't. You like me." He grinned. 

"That would be a negative."

He shrugged and licked his lips watching you bit yours. "Whatever helps you sleep at night, Princess."

You ignored him and started looking around the fairgrounds for what to do next. You couldn't hide your excitement when you landed on the ferris wheel.

Erik followed your line of sight. 

"You wanna go on it?"

"Can we please?" You even pouted for good measure.

"Whatever you want, Princess." He smiled. 

You squealed in excitement and shot off toward the ride. The ferris wheel was your favorite. When you were a child you used to go with your dad and he'd let you sit in his lap and watch the lights. The ferris wheel has always had sentimental value to you.

While you were caught in your thoughts you weren't paying attention to where you were going. One second you were running through the fair, ignoring Erik's pleas for you to slow down and the next you tripped and were catapulting to the ground. You closed your eyes and braced yourself for impact, but someone grabbed your wrist and pulled you before you made it to the ground. 

You were spun around so quickly you lost your balance and fell into Erik's chest. He wrapped his hands around your waist and steadied you to his body. You looked up, you actually hadn't really noticed how much taller he was compared to you, you only came to the center of his chest. Erik's face was full of concern. He grabbed your face with both hands and scanned you from head to toe. 

"You ok, Bunny? Did you scrape anything?" You could only shake your head silently, you were still in a bit of a daze. You could feel the shift in the air, you felt it earlier when he wiped the mustard off your face, but it was much more potent now. The air was crackling with electricity. 

Erik pulled you in closer, his head tilting slightly. He was definitely going to kiss you this time. You closed your eyes and leaned in. Just a few more inches, a few more centimeters…

You were both startled out of your bubble when a kid ran by and bumped into you. You inwardly groaned with frustration, but you took some comfort in seeing that Erik was irritated too. That was definitely a close call. You almost got swept away. You had to be careful, Erik may be nicer than you expected, but he was still a fuckboy who would break your heart eventually. You shook off the haze and pulled away. You both made your way to the ferris wheel together, but it was different this time. You refused to acknowledge it, because acknowledging made it real, but Erik didn't let go of your hand the entire way there.

The wait in line for the ferris wheel was awkward to say the least. You could feel the heat from Erik's hand as it held yours. You tried a few times to separate the hold when your hands started to sweat, but he wasn't having it. 

He eyed you sternly after your most recent attempt, "Why do you keep trying to let go? I slaved over a carnival game and won you a prize and you can't even hold my hand? That's cold, beautiful." He pressed his other hand to his chest in playful hurt. 

You rolled your eyes and scoffed, trying your hardest not to swoon at the fact that he called you beautiful again. 

"Oh please, you have girls drool over you all the time, I'm sure you're not worried about me."

He moved forward and handed over your tickets. 

"I don't know what you're talking about, Bunny." Both of you stepped forward as the ride came to a stop and got into the car. You smirked as you slowly rose up as the other cars were loaded. "Sure sure."

Once you were close to the top, Erik shifted so he was next to you. His hand reached to grab yours. "I'm really happy you came today, Y/N. I hope I get more chances to spend time with you."

You turned to him and smirked to hide your internal swooning. "You are definitely smooth. I'll give you that. No wonder all those girls fawn over you."

Erik pulled back to rub his hands over his face. "Stop saying that shit Y/N! You've been taking little jabs at me all night and it's annoying! Why do you keep shutting me down every time I try to talk to you?"

"Because I refuse to be another one of your hoes who pines away for you while you're on to the next set of open legs! I'm not that kind of girl and I'm not interested in a one night stand with you!" You sneered. 

"That's exactly what I'm talking about! You've been calling me a hoe all night! Where are you getting that shit from!" He raised his voice slightly. 

You scoffed. “Practically every girl on campus. 'Erik's the best I ever had' 'Erik ruined me for other guys' 'Erik turned me out'. It seems like you've fucked everyone on campus but me. Is that why you're so fixated on me now? Because I'm the one pussy you haven't fucked yet?"

Erik's hand shot out and landed on the top of the bench, the loud sound made you jump. He leaned in closer to you, his mouth in a snarl.

"They're all fucking lying! I havent fucked any girl on campus because I've been checking for YOU!" 

Your eyes started to water. How dare he try to play you for some fool. "You must think I'm stupid. Am I a joke to you? You really expect me to believe that?" You tried to hide the break in your voice and the tears threatening to spill, but you were a terrible actress and your face was far too expressive. You looked away to stare at the lights and people down below. You needed a second to get your guard back up.

He frowned, "Yes! I'm not a liar Y/N. I've told you nothing but the truth since I met you. I had no intentions of getting with anyone when I started school, because I wanted to put all of my attention on basketball. I didn't want any girls distracting me from that. I only went to parties because someone had to drive my drunk ass teammates back home. But that changed when I saw you at one of my games freshman year. I didn't know you yet, but you were the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen. I've been checking for you ever since, trying to get your attention, trying to get to know you."

You knew you were gaping, but you couldn't help it. "I don't understand. Why would all of those girls lie?"

He scoffed, "Because I turned down so many of them, they were probably embarrassed so they tried to get clout by saying they had sex with me. I heard a few rumours, but I didn't pay it any mind because I knew they were all lies."

You paused, "So all the play flirting?"

Erik kisses his teeth and leaned back, spreading his legs out so his thigh rested against yours. "Wasn't playing at all. I like you Y/N. I've been trying to get you to give me the time of day for over a year. I want to date you, get to know you."

Suddenly all of the things that didn't make sense earlier pieced together. Erik paying for your food, his concern when you almost fell, all of the little pet names he calls you. It all added up and the realization hit you in the gut. 

"I've been horrible to you. You must hate me." You covered your face in your hands. Erik scooted closer to you and pried them away. "I don't hate you at all. Now that I understand where your head is I get why you acted like that. But that's not me, beautiful. I'm not that guy. Everything I've shown you has been genuine."

You nodded, "I know. I see it now."

He smiled and grabbed your hands, "I really like you Y/N. You're smart, and funny, and beautiful, and everything else I want. I want to make you mine, if you'll let me?"

You nodded. "I like you too, Erik. Way more than I wanted to admit."

He smiled brightly and grabbed your face. You closed your eyes as he got closer and tilted his head. You could feel his breath on your lips as he closed in, you could smell his cologne and the crisp night air. When his lips made contact you sighed and leaned into him, your hands fisting in the front of his shirt and pulling him closer. Your lips moved together like they were already familiar with each other, perfectly in sync. Way too soon, Erik pulled away, resting his forehead against yours.

"Y/N, will you be my girl?"

You smirked, "Ok, but first kiss me."

He grinned, "As you wish."

Taglist: @aislinnsilver @wawakanda-btch @chaneajoyyy @marvelmaree

[sillyguyhotline]

the joe character ask

i’ve been responding to the prompts so slowly bc school but here’s the one for joe that i didn’t put in the previous ask 

Joe

Why I Like Him-

Honestly, this shouldn’t even be a question at this point, he’s hands down my favorite character. I adore the dynamic that he has with Sara, I adore his cheerful and peppy personality, and I adore the fact that he still undergoes realistic questioning of his morals despite being such a kind and generally “good person.” And, as I’ve stated many times before, I think that his death came at the perfect time to impact Sara’s development while also letting him go through a character arc and become a significant enough character for his death to hurt. I,,, I love him so much dhfbhdfbd

Why I Don’t-

There isn’t really a lot here; like I’ve said, he’s just generally a really good character! If I had to pick something, though, I’d say that there are a lot of unresolved suspicions surrounding him from the get-go and I don’t like that they haven’t been resolved yet. Considering how cheerful and trusting he is otherwise, he’s oddly suspicious of Keiji and the others right from the beginning, and is the first to suggest the possibility of a traitor- rather uncharacteristic for what we know of him. Was it just part of his character arc to make him dying due to the Sacrifice card even more sympathetic, or is there more to him? I, personally, really want the “Mr. Policeman is Joe’s dad” theory to be true, so I’m hoping that if we get that reveal, his initial suspicions will tie into that. I’ll be sort of disappointed if they continue to go unresolved.

Favorite Scene-

Honestly, I’ve always adored the scene where Joe and Sara walk home together. In only around 5 minutes, Nankidai is able to characterize them both perfectly (especially Joe), to portray them as close friends who enjoy teasing each other, and to establish that they’re still good friends even though Joe is dating Ryoko. Especially when you go back and play through the game without the initial worry of whether Joe is going to betray you, it’s easy to realize how genuinely sweet and well-written that scene is. I love it a lot :))

Favorite Line-

Because I’m very shitty at remembering lines, I’ll go with the classic one: “I love ya, Sara! You’re my best friend!” I also thought his AI’s line of “I’ll always follow you- just like a dog!” is a pretty funny one. 

Favorite Outfit-

I probably won’t include this with everyone else’s but I just want to take a minute to appreciate Joe’s gaudy-ass outfit. He has style. Period. Those earrings? That hairclip? Absolutely iconic, there’s a reason Sara cries every time she sees them after 1-2. 

OTP-

LMAO are you kidding me?? Joesara all the way. I also like the concept of Ryojoesara, but I just love their dynamic in-game and how close they are to each other, romantic or platonic. And… I just honestly adore the idea of the two of them together! I love the friends to lovers trope, and their personalities complement each other so well! They’re very sweet.

Brotp-

For this, I’d have to choose between either Gin or Shin. Joe leaning into the “big bro Joe” assignment is so precious, and I’ve always been a sucker for their little exchange where Gin promises to kick his ass in Mario Kart or something. I think he’d make a great big brother to Gin; they could bond over their love of dogs :) I’ve also seen a lot of Nankidai’s sketches of Joe and Shin together, and honestly I think they’d make for great friends- Joe could help pull Shin out of his “loner” persona and they could be buddies! If only </3

Headcanon-

Like I’ve said, I’m really bad at coming up with specific headcanons, but… I hc Joe as bi, he just gives off those vibes. He also probably has Tiktok and tried to get Sara and Ryoko to do Tiktok dances with him for awhile before giving up. Also!! He probably still sleeps with at least one stuffed animal (a stuffed dog would be very on-brand for him) but is self-conscious as hell about it and has only told Sara.

Unpopular Opinion-

This seems to be a pretty unpopular opinion because of how much people love to talk about it, but I really dislike the Mastermind Joe theory. I’ve talked about this before, but I think it’s very implausible; Nankidai’s writing is centric around character development, not the shock value of plot twists. Sacrificing all of Sara’s development throughout Chapter 2 (which consisted of her reacting realistically to her grief and was handled very well imo) would be so counterproductive and it would make the game feel so much cheaper. Perhaps Joe’s AI might be weaponized against her again or it might make future appearances, but I doubt the living Joe will turn out to be evil, much less a conspirator or even mastermind with ASUNARO. It just wouldn’t make sense, and it would honestly ruin his character.

A Wish-

I’ve already mentioned that I want the “Mr. Policeman is Joe’s Dad” theory to be true, so I’m gonna say that I really want my theory about the AI to come true as well. I really want Sara to end up going home with Joe’s AI if she survives, and I want the emotional distress of seeing the fake version of her dead best friend to be evident. Give me that angst, PLEASE </3

An Oh-God-Please-Don’t-Ever-Happen:

Mastermind Joe Theory!! Please don’t ruin his character.

5 Words To Describe Him-

Gaudy Dog Boy Deserved Better

 My Nickname for Him-

I don’t really have a lot, but I think I misspelled his name as “hoe” in a conversation once and ever since I think of him as “Hoe Tazuna.”

[doomedandstoned]

Cave of Swimmers Reach Epic Heights in Infectious New Spinner ‘Aurora’

~Review by Billy Goate~

Album Art by Brian Olson

I've always said that given the right circumstances (say a good set of professional ears lodged in influential places) that CAVE OF SWIMMERS would be a sensation. Why? Because they've got all the right stuff to really connect with people at a time when heavy music has been simmering underground, well-past ready for a fresh outburst. Hamstrung by lockdowns, financial burdens, and fear aplenty, we're ready to dust off our air guitars and party like it's 1987 again (incidentally, the year I first discovered heavy music). I'm not alone in speculating that we're in for another Roaring Twenties, not unlike the carefree days that followed the last global pandemic. And it's precisely this kind of energetic vibe, with its unique Latin-meets-metal flavor, that is ripe and ready to rock 'n' revel to!

Hell, we've not heard a sound this contagious since, well, maybe Sepultura -- and that was another animal entirely. With that said, Cave of Swimmers are very much metal to the core. And oh what a crowd-rousing live show Guillermo Gonzalez (guitar, synth, vox) and Arturo Garcia (drums, backing vox) can put on! I was there when Cave of Swimmers energized a hung-over and droopy mob gathered 'round The Vinyl Stage at the Hard Rock Hotel & Casino, lo those many years ago at the inaugural Psycho Las Vegas.

Doomed & Stoned · The Doomed & Stoned Show - The Cave Of Swimmers Special

All that and they have an appealing back story: two friends whose families relocated to Florida amidst tumultuous circumstances in Venezuela. As teenagers, Arturo and Guillermo grew up idolizing bands like Iron Maiden and Metallica and now they've crafted a fantastic, original style of their own, with wicked guitar play and grandiose vocals built atop a rhythmic array that is simultaneously feverish and suave, with choruses that are imminently singable. Stream their latest LP at least twice through and I can predict which lines you'll be humming at work and crowing in the shower at the top of your lungs.

When the band burst upon the scene in 2013 with Cave of Swimmers, I remember the community sharing it like mad. From "Materia" onward to their incredible namesake anthem, it was as if the Latin Candlemass had emerged from the salty Atlantic to enthrall crowds like some kind of warbling Creature from the Black Lagoon.

Cave of Swimmers by CAVE OF SWIMMERS

Their music-making only got better from there. 2015 gifted us with a second EP, Reflection, featuring a song I have no doubt will one day be a doom metal standard, "Prince of the Power of the Air". I'm telling you, the Psycho crowd went stompin' nuts when they heard those quasi-Biblical lyrics sung in epic doom fashion accompanied by that stern guitar tone, leading up to an incredible solo, and then a delirious second-half, which made everyone dance (whether we wanted to or not). It's infectious, like I said. I'm telling you, this sound cannot be matched. And I'm convinced it will not be stopped, either.

Reflection by CAVE OF SWIMMERS

2021 is Cave of Swimmer's year to ascend, for thus saith the Prophet that dwelleth atop the Rocks on High! Pandemic or no, it was this duo's time to release the material that had been welling up inside of them for so long. I guess we can call this their first LP, even though every spin so far has felt sufficiently hefty to refer to as a full-length. Six songs clocking in at over 30 minutes -- it's the band's next stepping stone in their journey from the recording studio into your earbuds and mine.

Aurora by CAVE OF SWIMMERS

'Aurora' (2021) plays like the first songbird of spring, if you'll indulge my idyllic wording for a moment. It's just so full of earnestness, life, and yes joy. Three things that we've been longing for in the midst of so much treachery and nihilistic despair. Hell, I consider myself something of a nihilist, but this band melts away my grim pessimism. It's all encapsulated in the thrashy, downtuned attack married to a kind of urgent Latin vibe that says "We've got one night left to live, let's die with a smile!"

After an atmospheric introduction that foreshadows material still to come, we're treated to "The Sun," which the band released as a single awhile back. I remember telling them at the time, "You guys should be huge." I meant it with all my heart, too. Certainly, this isn't watered down pop music fare, yet I think the average heavy music listener will find it wholly accessible. I'd put this Cave of Swimmers neck-and-neck with any Top 50 touring metal act, based on this track alone. Maybe I'm just enamored of their sound and being less than objective. So sue me.

Next up: "Double Rainbow," which is a kind of resurrection of optimism. Hope for a new and better tomorrow. "Forget the hate, forget the scene, forget the life of complacency," Guillermo sings. "A second arc, new scenery, our time is here. Don’t let it go! When I hear it, I too want to believe." It's a message that's especially important for us to convey to the next generation of rockers and metalheads, lest they be weighed down by our own disillusionment and mistakes. This is a song that encourages that that brash, foolhardy youthful joie de vivre and its power to change the status quo.

"My Human" opens up with a burst of syncopated guitar that reminds me of something Tom Morello likes to cook up, but its mere window dressing for a song that develops into something purely Cave of Swimmers. A single melodic line of epic singing accented by a soft layer of synthesizer lays out the verse, followed by one headbanger of a chorus. It's a song about companionship and the consolation that we can have in one another, if we will only open ourselves up long enough to being truly human. To give and in turn receive. It also seems to speak of a hope beyond this life, at least in some ethereal, metaphysical sense.

"Looking Glass'' unloads a spitfire of "Say hello to my little friend!" style riffage that rips open into a chorus I could definitely take with me to salsa lessons, if I were to dare return. Remind me to tell you about the time I accidently cracked a partner's nose with my elbow while trying to pull off one of those fancy turn-and-swing maneuvers. Sigh. Some of us have no rhythm, whatsoever. But I recognize a good slam-dancing song when I hear it!

Which leads me to talk "Dirt." Much more gritty than its predecessors, accompanied by a spooky synth of the kind Rob Zombie or Acid Witch are apt to toy with. Even as the mood turns grim, it's a foot shuffler nonetheless. And there's no denying the power of those soaring, falconesque vocals. Guillermo seems capable of transporting listeners to a higher plane of consciousness. Good thing, too, because the message is that we've all been living in our mental prisons for far too long, reinforced by "pride and ego trips."

Billions of us Where are we going to? Chasing our tails around the sun Bleeding our hearts Divided and conquered, too Buy us for sale at the dollar store Raised like pigs on dirt

It's time to break free. The song ends with a section of flamenco-style guitar executed with deft classical technique. It reminded me a bit of Psychroptic's "Euphorinasia" -- another song that makes brilliant use of acoustic guitar.

"C.S." is Cave of Swimmer's swan song -- a send-back to their earliest work. Their reprisal reminds me of something Metallica would do. There's a certain "Nothing Else Matters" mood about it all. Then out of nowhere, a spurt of volcanic riffage and mad drumming breaks out into a Gojiraesque hoe-down. Oh yes, and there's another celebratory trve metal guitar solo lodged in there juxtaposed with complex rhythmic percussion.

I'm telling you, Cave of Simmers cannot be beat. The game belongs to them. Their time is now. Give ear...

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[sweet-xoxo-thatcares]

1st dream I ever had of JA together was right after I started my new job at the tax spot, and Jay was texting me about a house they wanted to rent and was looking for a roommate to help cut the cost. They showed me this brown house with an upstairs and downstairs, but it was like near the Northside kinda...but near Kettering. I remember looking at the map thinking dang it look kinda rough in the neighborhood, but 800 something month sounded good split between 3 ppl.

The dream that night was us in this small looking house in the forest, but we were happy until we actually went outside towards our backyard and there was the trees. Pine trees to be specific. We started running towards it because we were playing a game,, idk if it was tag or hide and seek...all I know is that it felt like we both were playing, me and Jay running with Ayunna nearby running too, and then all of a sudden we had to start running back to the house cause a bunch of peopl started coming out of the woods chasing us, before we even hit the trees.

We ran for our lives, at almost full speed, but I don't remember who hit the house first and no they didn't look like zombies. It was just a burst of a bunch of people covered in black, from head to toe chasing us, going as fast as we were. I remember when I got to the house I couldn't find everyone and I told my lil sister (idk why she was there) to go check downstairs and low and behold Ayunna was whispering, calling someone on the phone as she was in the living room and I was peeking in on her through the kitchen. She said my name and said it sort of alert, but kept it on hush hush like a teacher calling a student's parent. She said "Kylee's shaking and freaking out about it."

And I think she meant it like I was ready to go home. I thought she was calling her mom, cause I didn't plan on telling my mom about moving out with them at the time.

Because I was scared and paranoid about being far away from home with strangers chasing us from the woods. I didn't see Jay when she made the phone call, Interestingly enough. I remember there was a closet filled with supplies with like an orange kayak, some sports gear, some oars, and some other stuff. I don't remember what I was looking for in the dream, I was just trying make sure nobody from outside got into the house.

Crazy right? And this was in 2019. Had I said anything, I'm sure they would have just thought it was a bad dream. The house in the dream didn't look Nothing like the house Jay had shown me. It looked sorta different, because there wasn't no carpet on the floor except in the living room. The house in the ad had carpet everywhere.

Also, as gross as I'm willing to admit....the 1st sexual dream of Jay happened in January right before we got let go of that bookstore temp job....

Jay was grinding on me fully clothed and kept grunting the words "respect it" with each ride/hump on my..... I woke up wet and confused because I didn't understand why Jay would have said that to me, hovering over me, starting with a serious face, one hand over my left shoulder, the other between my right arm and right side of my body. As if I was supposed to be scared or something....like wayyy too rough.

Now that I see it, I think Jay wanted me to respect their privacy and their body. Because around that time, I was questioning if I was even gay and how I could possibly even like them when I didn't even know if they had a dick or not or nothing at all....I was concerned and confused because Jay was taken and why was I thinking about it so damn hard for like a solid week I didn't see them at work and it drove me nuts not to know, but I couldn't ask cause that's rude. I kept trying to prove myself wrong with counteraccusations like "how can you know you're gay, when you haven't even kissed a girl? We don't know if she or they has boy parts?"

I felt really guilty about liking Jay, someone out of the spectrum and not my normal type....cause they weren't normal. They were like an alien to me, I usually could observe people 1st before talking to them and trusting them to see if we would even be a good fit or so....but in Jay's situation....i needed to do some research before I was the curious George asking too much information that I shouldn't have been interested in knowing but still wanted to know for my own sake. Like how to address non binary ppl, how to say they and use the pronouns, and xr./xrs. or etc...but Jay wanted to be called Mister later on.

I made sure I knew alot more than my coworkers to be prepared for conversation matters so I didn't come off like an ignorant associate who didn't bother to Google it before saying it out loud. Cause with anything new, I always google 1st and look on reddit for unfiltered personal opinions about stuff.

Which is still the reason why I think Jay could actually want to date/have sex with men in the future. after taking hormones so many ftms said once the dysphoria felt like it was gone and they were comfortable being themselves, as a man...they started opening back up that door they once closed towards men. Some even went girls only, to bisexual, to just gay (dating men). And there were a bit more reddit asking why there isn't as many straight ftms and why is there more ftms turning gay after transitioning....which sorta sucked to hear but I needed to know in case I had another panic attack again from being shocked from any more unexpected, extreme news from someone who always acted like they were anti-dick. Even to go as far as declining dick offers from sugarmommas they told me about.

It was gross to hear that they offered me up to that same random sugarmomma without even asking me if I was comfortable or even wanted to have sex with another stranger. Cause I sure as hell didn't. They just offered my name up to her, like they were selling me off as some hoe-sub. Being petty cause I started looking for an actual commitment on tinder.

I hated them for doing stupid, inconsiderate, uncomfortable shit like that, thinking Imma just go along with everything just because I liked them.

I'm still mad about that too. That jealous pig. Man whore themselves. They've slept with more ppl than me and had the nerve to call.me a "bedhopper" when you're the one getting yourself emotionally caught up and cheating on your girl by breaking rules she told you not too. Petty, angsty, stupid bitch with man issues. Didn't want nobody checking them about they behavior cause I guess they thought they were being overdominated.

This idiot thought I was tryna challenge their dominance (red flag #142🚩lol) when I said sarcastically "I wasn't gonna buy you none, anyway" when Jay interrupted me with "oh I don't want any candy." after I said as we waited in the avengers movie line "I should have gone to the dollar party to get some candy, had I known it was gonna be this long of a wait." They thought I was being hostile....when noooo I was just stating the candy wasn't for you, and why should I give a fuck? Lol 😆 I always do that with my sisters and parents at home. That's how we talk to each other, sarcastic assholes and smart jokes. I asked Jay is your masculinity sensitive after they called me out about making that comment that I thought wasn't offensive...but I guess it rubbed then the wrong way?? But like how, cause it was about candy and I wasn't mad at them when I said it.

They took that candy comment way too seriously. Cause even ayunna agreed with Jay that I was challenging their dominance? Like wtffff how can I challenge someone's dominance without even being aggressive, pushing a button, or getting in your face?

I think they thought I was just the nice girl who never talks back. Bullshiiiiittttt I have a mouth. I'm allowed to speak 🤣😅 fucking idiots and they thought I was the sensitive one. Jay sensitive too. Any time they felt less like a man, they took it out on us, like a lil crybaby, like a punk. But I didn't say anything....cause it seemed like anything I said to defend myself they would get into my head too about how it don't make sense.

Truly I think we just came from 2 different backgrounds, one where I was taught to obey but speak my mind. And Jay was taught that control and making others controlled by fear, while they got to be enabled to do so...was their life at home being the oldest. I never like even my own manager for doing that, controlling, poking, and bitching about stress then then taking it out on us because he has anger and commitment issues at biglots.

Jay came from "I'm the man, you're supposed to shut up and be quiet when I say it." I came from a house that woulda whooped yo ass for saying shit like that to my own momma. We don't play that shit around here and I grew up in the south, and southern raised folk. You always respect women just as proper and equal as men too. Yes sir, thank you ma'am, and do you need some napkins, that southern hospitality and respect for other people, friends, and family I was taught that. Jay must have not been taught manners and stuff like I did. My momma and daddy a mind even teachers made me be nice and be a good listener, and a good student always ready, alert, paying attention. You got off task, you fall behind in school, so always pay attention. Dad always was hard on me reminding me to do my best and treat people the way you want to be treated.

[frostbytetherebel]

Obey Me! Brothers as songs from BLACKPINK’S ‘The Album’

I’ve been listening to the album on loop since its release. All the songs SLAPS. Eventually I came up with this so yeah let’s get started. 

(All English lyrics are taken from genius.com)

Lucifer: How You Like That 

This one is pretty obvious. 

First single from the album, first track, multiple records hit upon its release - idk sounds pretty much like “the mighty first-born” to me 

The song is basically about escaping a toxic relationship. You know who else has a toxic relationship? That’s right, Mr. Godly Daddy Issues. He literally started a war against his dad.

“Again in such a dark place, light up the sky” & “In such a darker place, shine like the stars” is literally the Morningstar himself in Devildom and no one can change my mind on this. Fact. 

Pridey McPrideface moment: “Look at you, now look at me”

There’s this line in the lyrics: “The day I went down with my wings lost/ Those dark days when I was trapped”, which I think fully represents his fall from heaven. Also queen Roseanne Park NAILED this scene in the MV: 

Yep. That’s the fall of an Archangel for me. 

Mammon: You Never Know 

Tbh I’ve had a hard time deciding on Mammon’s song. 

But then these lyrics hit me: “The words that everyone said so easily/ Maybe you can hear it soon/ I've heard enough I've heard enough/ Of the things that I'm not”

Mammon is constantly harassed by his brothers for being stupid. Sure, he might lack common sense, but it doesn’t give the brothers the full authority to shame him like that. 

“But you'll never know unless you walk in my shoеs/ You'll never know, my tangled strings/ 'Causе everybody sees what they wanna see/ It's easier to judge me than to believe” That’s our classic misunderstood tsundere right there. 

He’s probably the one who’s gonna stick with MC until the very end (y’all know how clingy he can be). “Even if the whole world changes/ I'm still the same”

Also remember during the Lamp event, he was the first one to say that he’d rather be with MC instead of ruling the world? Yeah, the line hits right there. 

At the same time, his feelings for MC? Y O U N E V E R K N O W

(But everyone does eventually) 

Leviathan: Love To Hate Me

“Kinda sad that you always been like that/ See me making waves and you don't like that” Levi usually gets emotional because of mangas/animes/video games (and I wouldn’t be surprised if he would actually flood the House Of Lamentation). And how many times do we see the brothers complain about that throughout the storyline? Countless. 

“Only thing I think about is big stacks” except the stacks are Ruri-chan goods. 

Notice how Levi is the one who gets involved in family drama the least (unless his video games are the direct cause for them)? Sounds a lot like “I keep it light/ No, no, no drama in my life”. 

Classic introvert line: “I need you? Nah, I been good lately/ Blowin' up, workin' busy” because who the fuck needs people when you can binge watch animes and blow shits up in video games all day? 

Poor boy keeps chasing Mammon because of the debt. “I'm takin' back what you've taken from me” yeah you go boy.  

Satan: Pretty Savage. 

The song title speaks for itself. 

Satan is definitely a pretty boy (fight me, I dare you). He shows off a friendly smile way too often that people sometimes forget that he’s the Avatar Of Wrath. 

And yeah, he can be pretty savage. 

He HATES being compared to Lucifer. “It seems similar, but we are different from the core”. He loathes it even more if people start calling him by his bRoThEr’s name. “If you get our name wrong, ddu-du-ddu-du hit” aka prepare for the wrath of kitty boyo.

Did I mention how he loves messing up Lucifer’s life? That’s exactly what “Yeah, we some bitches you can't manage/ I make this difficult thing again” means. 

When he gets angry, well “You better run, run, run”. 

This whole song just fits him perfectly. 

Well, except for the “I wore something similar to you, but it looks better on me” part because this man has absolutely no fashion sense. 

Asmodeus: Bet You Wanna

“MC I know you want meeeeee” 

Horny song for a horny demon boyo. 

Asmodeus is beautiful and he knows it. He’s undeniably the most confident demon in Devildom. He knows his looks are on another level. “Uh, I'm gonna make you go blind/ Every time I walk, my hips, they don't lie”

He’s also a party animal full of energy. Anywhere he goes, he’s gonna make sure all eyes are on him. “You wanna run with my love, I know you wanna/ From the club to the tub, you said you wanna/ Give me an all night hug, I bet you wanna”

And of course, the song screams his signature trait: his lust. “Let's do what we both desire/ On God, like I'm in the choir/ I bet you if you make me sweat, I'll still be on fire” Yeah mister, thank you for announcing your desire to have such intense sex that you’ll moan like a whole choir. Totally useful information. 

Also imagine Asmo singing along to this with Cardi B. 

The S A S S tho. 

Beelzebub: Ice Cream 

Another obvious one. 

“Wow, a food-themed song! Totally fits the Avatar Of Gluttony perfectly!” 

That’s what you think, right? Well, there’s actually more to that. 

At first glance, we all think that Ice Cream is just another summer song with cheerful and light-hearted beats, right? But haha SIKE BITCH it’s actually a horny song. 

It’s even more horny than Bet You Wanna. See the lyrics for yourself. 

And Beel, he may appear as a totally friendly demon who craves food 24/7 at first. 

But as we go deeper into the storyline, we realise that he’s actually not nice and naive like we thought. 

His personality has darker aspects (aka depressing memories) along with a needy side. 

How many times were MC asked to feed him (and then given the option to have a passionate kiss with him) during the storyline? Idk, I lost count already. 

Also I’m sure that 80% of this fandom wouldn’t mind being a hoe for him. 

Belphegor: Crazy For You 

(SPOILERS FOR LESSON 16)

Oh boy, here comes the yandere vibes. 

Belphie’s love is extremely obsessive. “If you're my (hu)man, I want you to myself”. 

When he was trapped in the attic, he knew he needed a plan to get out. And he knew that plan would eventually trigger Lucifer so much. But he proceeded anyway and approached MC first, because all he needed then was their attention. “I know I'll have enemies long as you're into me/ But I don't care 'cause I got what I need”

Being the natural cunning demon he is, he knows how to manipulate MC into helping him. “I saw you/ And knew what I was trying to do/ I had to play it rеal, real smooth/ And once I finally made my move/ I went crazy over you”

Remember what he did to MC after lesson 16? Cow boyo began pining to us like crazy. That part was so smooth I almost forgot he choked us to death. (Admit it, some of you actually forgot about it.) 

Like Jennie sang, “Feels wrong but it's right, right?”

[lowkeywritings]

Games - O.D. imagine (1/2)

Disclaimer: Hello! This is my first imagine for OMB; felt like writing some Spooky stories. A second part will be coming for this, so please let me know your thoughts on it! And thank you to @spookysprincesa for helping out! (gif not mine)

Feel free to send in requests!

Warnings: language, far too angst-y, will be redeemed in second part 

Word Count: 2931 oops

//

She knew it had been a bad idea. Her sister had said as much, too. And her mamma. And that really short kid from around the block, big eyes and all. 

There are some things you just know.

The sun will rise tomorrow. Prophets are the enemy. Water is wet. The sky is blue. There’s no such thing as the ‘friendzone’. 

Also, Oscar Diaz is an asshole. 

Yet, knowing that, and having witnessed hordes of women enter and leave Spooky’s life, most for quite short-lived affairs, she had managed, unluckily for her, to get involved with him. 

It had started the way most of these things do - somewhat intoxicated and unbothered by the idea of consequences. A few too many blunts had her floating above the sofa, getting lost in a dark, hypnotizing gaze, losing all sense of where he ended and she began. Years of friendship down the drain, of swallowing down feelings, because of course he doesn’t like you and this couldn’t work out, he’s not like that.

His lingering touches told a different story that night, yet here they were. She, locked in a damp and dimly-lit bathroom, losing a staring contest with her own reflection - he, smugly sat on a decaying barcalounger in his own living room, winning a contest of his own in which his hand battled with rising up an excessively short skirt tightly wrapped around an excessively attractive woman. 

Had to be expected, really. A few smashes after parties, unbeknownst to everyone they knew, didn’t exactly make for a solid relationship. They weren’t a thing. She didn’t want them to be, anyway. Right?

Contest over. Her reflection won, puffy eyes and all. But what did it matter? He wasn’t hers to cry over. She took an extra minute to talk herself up, index finger pointed at the mirror.

You a bad bitch. You don’t care about him, or his stupid pretty face. You’re a warrior. Show no fear. 

It seemed a bit much, but it worked, and soon enough she was ready to face the outside. 

The air was heavy as she emerged from the bathroom, blasting music bringing her back to the harsh reality unfolding in front of her. The door snapped behind her - forgot it did that - bringing a few questioning stares her way. 

His, namely. His eyes flashed of regret for an instant, so fast you could’ve almost missed it. She didn’t. 

Miss short-skirt didn’t, either, and certainly not when he stood, quite roughly, and her excessively round bottom nearly won over the floor. He held her back, his hand around her waist, and the room suddenly got blurry once again.

Confused as to why this was bothering her so much, she opted to leave it to the universe to figure its stuff out and cut the night short. Why stay around if the only person you truly want to hang out with is busy with someone else? 

What kind of game is that? 

Fresh air entered her lungs and she breathed it in, like pushing her head above water. It felt light, freeing. Nothing anchoring her down in that god-forsaken living room. She had fond memories of that place, of hanging around him without a care in the world, laughing it up. Simple times. When the idea of him feeling up some other girl didn’t matter much, because he just didn’t know what he was missing then. 

He did now, yet he was still in there with her and she was out here by herself.

She was barely passed the outside sofa, however, when she heard the door, her chest tightening at the idea that it might be him. Probably wasn’t, though. That kind of thing only happens on TV.

“Hey.”

His voice was low, but clear and unmistakably his. It cut through the dark night and stopped her going forward, feigning surprised as she turned to him. 

“Hmm?” she sang back, a perfect picture on nonchalance. She wasn’t leaving because of him, or his new conquest, and she didn’t care about his stupid ass anyway. 

“Where you goin’?” He caught up with her in a few long steps, simultaneously getting out a pack of cigarettes from his pocket. He offered her one, and she declined with a wave of her hand. 

“Dunno. Why?” she asked, raising an eyebrow and watching as he lit his own cigarette. 

He shrugged. “Just curious.” Yeah right. “Shouldn’t go walkin’ around too much at night, though. Lookin’ like this,” he added, avoiding her eyes as he looked around, then at the ground. 

“Like what?” she insisted, raising her eyebrow in a dramatic fashion. He smirked swiftly, the sight of his dimple making her stomach flip, but evaded the question. 

“You know,” he replied, voice low, still not looking at her much. He seemed more interested in staring into the distance and squaring his shoulders, like he was trying to intimidate the air or something. She knew, of course, what he meant. He meant to say she looked nice, like someone who might get attention. He meant it as a compliment, but seemed very intent of not letting it out.

She waited, hopeful. It never came. “Sure,” she sighed. 

He was a very poor conversationalist for someone who had chased her down in her leave. She stayed silent, watching him take a long drag of his smoke, taking the time to admire his face.

“Doesn’t mean anything, you know,” he said quite suddenly, meeting her eyes for the first time. Her questioning look let him know she wasn’t sure what he meant, and he went on. “Deena.”

He said the girl’s name like that was supposed elicit some sort of reaction. Miss short skirt doesn’t mean anything, he said. Ah.

Their own encounter didn’t seem to mean much, either, despite their prior friendship, yet they had still seen each other naked five times. Did it really have to mean something for her to be annoyed? 

She hadn’t even been with anyone else, not that he’d asked her for that. Though she knew, as well as everyone else, that he probably wouldn’t have taken kindly to it. Typical older brother, alpha-male attitude. 

Never wants to share anything. 

“What’you mean?” she asked, perfectioning the act of pretending she didn’t know, or care, that he would or had already stuck it in with some other chick. That the mere idea of it was making her blood boil. That she didn’t wish she could walk back in the house, grab that puta by the hair and yank her through a window, and flying far away from Freeridge, Spooky’s living room, and his dick.

Spooky didn’t explain, and instead studied her face for a minute too long. He seemed annoyed, for a second, like he hadn’t expected it. Like he, too, wanted her to go back into the house, hair-yanking galore.

Had he been putting on a show for her benefit, she wondered. Sounded like him, the way he always enjoyed mocking others and getting a laugh out of it. That kind of game, however, with her as the butt of the joke, seemed a bit far fetched even for him. 

“Oscar,” she continued innocently before he could say anything, taking a step towards him, getting close enough that she had to tilt her head up slightly to catch his gaze. She batted her eyelashes at him, and his eyes widened in excitement, enjoying the feeling of her soft hands on his broad chest. 

He had always liked the way she said his name. 

The way she whispered it through her lips made it sound something of a promise, a warmth he didn’t remember much of. 

The next thing she said, however, felt cold as ice. 

“You ain’t my man. Chill, okay? It’s not that serious.”

His nostrils flared as she stepped back, any hint of her presence now replaced with a gust of wind. 

She flashed him a sad smile, turning away and walking towards the street. She was heading home, not that she was going to tell him that. She preferred to give off the feeling that she was going out, enjoying her night, outside of him, who isn’t her man. 

“Hey!” he said again, this time much louder than before. She was further, to be fair, but he also seemed a little less friendly than before, too. She turned back, staying where she stood, in the middle of the street. 

“What?” she replied in the same tone, squaring her jaw. Time to drop the act, it seemed. She knew she has struck a chord, telling him to chill and leaving him behind. Knowing him, he was bound to be annoyed. Angry, even, or so his eyes said.

“What’re you playing at?”

“I ain’t playing. I’m leaving.”

He kissed his teeth, taking a deep breath. Trying to calm himself down, she realized. He really was angry. She beamed at the thought, pleasantly surprised that she could incite that in him. She had always been the one to calm him down, when he got riled up. When they were just friends.

“You’re not leaving, for one,” he said, his voice rumbling. She felt a shiver run through her spine, but hoped it didn’t show on her face. Now is not the time, hoe. “And you’re not talkin’ to me like that, either.”

“Or what?” she challenged him, using a loud voice she didn’t know she had. “What’s your problem?”

“My problem,” he went on, clenching his jaw as he took a step forward, “is your fucking tone. Now get back inside.”

She let out a humourless laugh, tilting her head to the side like she was truly wondering if he was serious. He clearly was, by the stare he was giving her, his tensed body and the dangerous steps he kept taking towards her. 

‘Spooky’ was right. 

“My tone’s just fine, and I am leaving. Give Deena my regards, will ya?” she spat, turning away like she didn’t know he was already steps away from her and about to catch up with his ridiculously tall legs. She knew by saying that, she was admitting defeat, but it was too late now.

“Ah!” he exclaimed, and she heard him very close, as he was fast approaching. Her power walking kept her ahead, however, and she tried her best to ignore him. “So that is why you’re tryin’ to leave,” he laughed, suddenly a lot less tensed. “Don’t worry, mami, you still the finest hyna on the block.”

She all but punched him square across the face as she heard him chuckle behind her.

Asshole.

She cursed herself for letting the situation get the best of her like this. She knew very well he didn’t owe her anything, and that kind of reaction only made sense if they had agreed to some sort of exclusivity, which they had not. Still, with years of friendship behind them and what she thought was mutual respect they had between them, she felt entitled to a better treatment than that. Instead, he seemed to be taking far too much pleasure in knowing he had gotten under her skin. 

“Come oooon, don’t be like that,” he insisted, suddenly catching up to her like he’d been holding back until then, rounding his arm around her waist and stopping her dead in her tracks. She fought against his hold, but he was too strong, and she turned to face him, pure rage flashing on her features. 

“What do you want? Why don’t you just go back to your putas and leave me alone,” she spat, pushing against his chest. He let go of her, letting out a loud laugh as she fumed in front of him. 

“Chillout, mujer. It’s not that serious, right?” he replayed her words, smirking. If looks could kill, he would be dead, the way she stared him down like he was the most unpleasant thing to look at on the planet. 

Far from it, obviously.

“You don’t get it.” 

“Get what? That you’re mad? No, you’re right, I don’t.”

She cursed under her breath, shaking her head, more at herself than at him. Of course he wouldn’t get it. She had been a fool to think that having known him and cared for him all this time would change anything. He was still the same guy, and she wasn’t special. 

She wasn’t special enough to be the one he would be true to. 

“Forget it, then,” she sighed, feelings tears swell up. She bit at her cheek, trying to focus on other things. Not them, him, with his deep eyes and his sweet touch and everything about him that she knew but no one else did. They way he laughed, the way he smelled, the way he said her name, the way he hugged her when they said hello, the way he kissed her forehead when they said goodbye, the way his features softened at the sight of his brother…

She closed her eyes suddenly, hiding her face in embarrassment as she tried, in vain, to pull herself back together. His face dropped, filling with worry as he realized what was going on.

“Hey, hey, hey,” his voice reverberated like a whisper somewhere above her head. She had to keep looking down or he would see the tears, and he obviously already knew she was crying by now but she couldn’t bare the thought of him seeing her.  “Baby?”

His use of the nickname only made the tears double, and she tried to turn away but he had her locked in place in a second, like he already knew what she was about to do. His palms caressed her face as he tilted her head up, getting a full view of her wet cheeks and puffy eyes. He must think I’m quite a sight, she thought. Such a sexy alternative to whatsherface in the skirt. She averted her eyes, ashamed and annoyed.

“Look at me,” he asked, and she did, biting at her lips to try and control the tears. “What’s wrong, mami?”

He was surprisingly soft, like she knew he could be, and she enjoyed the feeling of his fingers by her temple, and the proximity of his body. He smelled of smoke, and some cologne he’d been wearing since forever that she loved. 

“Nothing, I’m s-sorry. Forget it, okay? I’m fine,” she lied, staring into his eyes with her best attempt at seeming genuine. She sniffed, swiping the tears away from her cheeks, trying to erase the damage.

“Stop lyin’ to me,” he insisted, and she sighed. 

“I’m not-”

“Yes, you are. Cut the bullshit, tell me what’s wrong,” he ordered, and despite the tone, she knew he meant it to be caring. 

She stayed silent, trying to steer away from all the things she wished to say but couldn’t, wouldn’t, and she knew would make her cry more. 

“Baby, it’s me,” he insisted. “You know you can tell me anything.”

“Not this,” she finally replied, wiping away a few more stray tears. What could she say, really? 

She couldn’t exactly let him know how she felt, what she wanted from him. She knew this had been a mistake, going from friends to whatever this was. Especially knowing how she felt about him. Telling him what was wrong meant never being able to be as close as before. It would ruin everything. 

“Just tell me.”

“No.”

“Just fucking say it.”

“There’s nothing to say.”

“Bullshit!” He was getting annoyed, speaking with a bit more vigor each time, but she wouldn’t let up. She took a few deep breaths, refusing to answer. “Is there something you want to tell me, nena?” he added, searching her eyes, and her heart sped up. 

It’s almost like he knew. 

Asshole.

She had grabbed the back of his neck and crashed her lips on his before she could really register it. All she knew is that she needed this, to have him to herself just one more minute.

He reciprocated in full force, meeting her with his soft, plump lips and slipping his tongue inside her mouth in a strong, efficient effort into taking control of the kiss. She fell into his arms, his hands going to her hair, both her arms around his neck. Electricity flew through her body as she let out a moan, heat rising in her face and between her legs. This is what she craved for. All the time. 

Letting go to catch some air, she let her stare wander across his face, taking in all the details of his features like this. Panting, flushed, looking at her with a desire she couldn’t get enough of. She pecked him on the lips one last time, and on the cheek, and stepped away before he could reach for her again. 

“Have a good night, Oscar.”

Her breathing was still erratic, and her hands trembled slightly as she took a few more steps away from him. He looked at a loss, his arms fallen on either side of him, deflated.

“You can’t be serious,” he said, his voice breaking slightly, just enough for her to notice. “What are you playing at?”

“I’m not playing.”

She left before he could witness the waterworks again, going from a strong walk to an all-out run as soon as he was out of sight. He called out to her, but she was too embarrassed to turn back. 

Everyone was right. This was just the worst idea. 

She should’ve known sleeping with the man she loved was a mistake.

What kind of game is that? 

[taylornock]

how cell phones made our lives better while simultaneously ruining them

hi fam!! it’s me, again. are you tired of hearing from me? me too. that’s why I’m here to rant about social media / phone / technology. bc i hate it… but in a loving way???

everyone remembers when they got their first iPhone. seriously. why is that such a monumental moment in our lives? i can hardly remember what i felt like freshman year of high school but can pinpoint the feeling of sheer glee unwrapping my iPhone 6 in eighth grade. i have this thing that is attached to me 24/7 - when I go anywhere (even downstairs) without my phone i feel weird. that is f***ing SAD! PATHETIC. i hate feeling that dependent on what is essentially a pocket robot.

for what it’s worth - phones have done INCREDIBLE things for the world as we know it. for example, this quarantine shit has been testing all of us; and our phones are helping us get through it in so many ways. our phones let us see the faces of those loved ones we are missing, our phones provide us with stupid tik tok content to keep everything light hearted, and our phones let us check in on each other. all amazing things! when we are at school, we have instant access to our lives at home . being able to call my mom whenever i want is something i definitely abuse. “mom, I’m on my way home from Thompson right now and i think i have a brain aneurysm but my bio final is at 11am tomorrow will i make it” … an actual conversation i had with my mom at the end of freshman year. needless to say i was medicated shortly after THAT meltdown. I am such a brat that i don’t know what i would do if i couldn’t text my dad and have him immediately get me the password again to our Uverse account…… god forbid i miss an episode of the bachelor. i have this phone, and that’s what i do with it? abuse its powers to ask my parents for medical advice or a password i forgot? have we lost sight of everything here?

throughout life and especially throughout quarantine… my phone is the definition of a possession that is a blessing and a curse. I’m so grateful to have the ability to bother my friends - whenever i want! the options are endless! i love keeping in touch with people i thought id never hear from again, and being able to talk to so many people in my life and make my heart swell. now, when a conversation with someone other than my two roommates (shoutout parents) is so rare ⎯ that phone is my weapon and i use it to help flatten the curve: flatten the curve of covid19 and flatten the curve of my mental illness 🙃 [humor is a coping mechanism okay let me live] but like, i KNOW i’m not the only one that looks at my screen time and immediately wants to die. how can i honestly be looking at my phone for that long? picking it up THAT many times?????? my phone is the best distraction and also the most toxic - it makes me feel better but has a tendency to bring up all my issues and blast them into the reflection of my blue light glasses...... its called fashion look it up.

to give some examples - let’s open up my most used app: snapchat. I go on snapchat with the best of intentions - to see a memory from a year ago that makes me smile. to respond to my friends and see what their mood today is based on the look on their face. to creep on snap stories and see what everyone’s cooking and doing with their lives. somehow, tho, after spending a few minutes on the app.. i end up with a pit in my stomach most of the time. the person i want to respond hasn’t responded in 4 hours. oh god lets overthink this- they don’t like me anymore and are no longer interested in speaking to me and only respond every once in a while out of pity or because they are uncomfortable. everyone hates you. oh and GOD FORBID someone leaves me on open??! I am not funny nor interesting nor worth a reply - suddenly, i have equated my value to receiving or not receiving a photo of someone’s blank stare. this is extreme, and this is dramatic. but trust me —— this is the hamster wheel always turning in my head. I’m not even going to touch on snap maps; that feature is pandoras box and someone better fucking shut it.

second most used app is instagram. i scroll for hours, i have time limits set for the app acting like i’m actually going to listen to them and get off. lmaooooooooo. i love looking at aesthetic stuff and dogs and food and recipes and my friends’ beautiful faces. but you know what i don’t like? constant nudges to compare myself to others. oh look at her having a party with all of her friends even though we aren’t supposed to be. am i a loser for trying to be safe? oh look at her washboard abs, i’m never going to look like that and will never live up to the standard of beauty society has set for me. look at all of these people in their happy relationships. why can’t i have that? it goes over and over and over. its not like i sit there and think of these things just like that, its a precedent in my mind when i stare at everybody else that i am going to size my own life up against theirs. for years i followed every single elite model / VS angel on instagram to motivate me to do better - to start being psycho about what i did to my body so i could be as gorgeous as them. what kind of fucked up mindset is that? i would literally watch their footage of them eating rice and vegetables once a day and try to copy it. i would watch their runway walks obsessively trying to recreate them in heels alone in my house - like that was all i could imagine doing with my life. did i ever stop for a second to look at that photoshoot of gigi hadid and wonder if she was happy? wonder if the constant pictures she saw of herself ever made her insecure? what was i doing? the day i unfollowed those girls was a monumental day in my journey to a better self image. i didn’t realize the people i thought were my “motivators” were actually my triggers. i have grown to a point in life now that i would much rather eat a stack of chocolate chip pancakes that make me dance in my chair like an infant than practice my runway walk and shame my body in the mirror. and i am so freakin happy! 

i could go app by app for hours. but moving on to the next thing i hate about cell phones - how they have destroyed our biological methods of communication. you hear about those psychos who think the world is destroyed by technology and we are going to be overrun by robots. but hey, I’m with the psychos on this one. i have this amazing friend, Trevor Wright, who without fail at EVERY dinner announces “phones off friends on” and collects our phones into the center of the table. yes, we are 20 year old adults. yes, we hand our phones over to Trevor and let him yell at us for trying to see if ~that person~ snap chatted us back. i have so much respect for him because of this. there is nothing worse than staring at your phones when you could be having a good conversation about life, about love, about laughter + memories, about “do you think hellen keller is real?” anything, bro, anything. anything but snapchat messaging your hoe of the week or mindlessly playing tetris to twiddle your thumbs. we all need to start loving a little harder, and the first step to doing that is to communicate better. communicate smarter. I’m guilty of alllll of the above, don’t get me wrong. and I am ADD asf and constantly playing mindless games just to stimulate my brain. but i need to stop that! even writing this is taking some time away from the dumb shit on my phone - and encouraging me to communicate how i     r e a l l y   feel to my homies that will read this. communication - especially body language - is fascinating. I’ve studied it in  psych, I’ve learned the neurological bases of behavior and why we do what we do. I’ve learned how much our life experience impacts who we are as a whole...and it! is! fascinating! i also think that’s why i love film so much. because it can capture the raw moments of your friends just being your friends, of you just being the person you are, and the world around you just existing as it exists. i love the raw moments; and not just because indy blue posted one youtube video of her slow mo laughing and now thats the only footage i find myself shooting. 😚

im not quite sure what this post is, lol. but - just a rant on technology. so listen to me:

take advantage of technology + social media! it CAN BE GREAT. for so many reasons. but, don’t let technology + social media TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU. stay true to you - know how to communicate with yourself and your loved ones without the use of a robot. remember that feeling when you setup up your first iPhone? imagine if you could feel that again, with your phone nowhere in sight. if you don’t know how to communicate with yourself yet, start by journaling. WRITE! TYPE! SPEAK! do what you want. getting your thoughts down even without an audience is so crucial to understanding yourself and others. if you don’t like to write, reflect. breathe. meditate. make art. do what makes you feel at peace, and do whatever makes you feel like the world makes a little bit more sense than it does. 

IF YOU ARE READING DOWN TO HERE, I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU, SAY IT BACK! LIFE IS A FUCKING HIGHWAY. AND IM SO GLAD YOU’RE ON MY INTERSTATE. <3

xoxoxoxo

gossip girl

[punkscowardschampions]

Buster & Rio

Buster: Where's Nance? Rio: She was with your parents last I saw Rio: but that was a while ago so Buster: Typical Buster: Oldest trick in the book for when she doesn't wanna talk to me Rio: Can't imagine why Buster: 'Course you can't Rio: 🙄 Buster: Yeah, like I was saying, always a pleasure Rio: Where? Buster: Exactly Rio: Hm Rio: I'll tell her you're looking for her, I guess Buster: Don't Buster: She'll find a new hiding place Rio: What have you done then? Buster: Cheers Buster: Really nice of you to assume it's all my fault Rio: you aren't the one hiding Buster: I'm not a pussy Buster: If something needs to get said, I'll say it Rio: That's why she's hiding then, I imagine Buster: I didn't ask you why, just where Rio: is it that pressing? Buster: What 'cause I'm gonna ruin all the fun she's having? Buster: You've got the wrong sister there, babe Rio: well it sounds like it Buster: I don't need your permission Rio: Why do you need to be a dick? Buster: To her or to you? Rio: Her, obviously Rio: It's not that deep Buster: I'm not being a dick to her Buster: I was last night, which is why I wanna talk to her Rio: Oh, so you wanna apologize Rio: you can't force her to accept it, probably wait for her to come out from wherever she is Buster: Did I say that? Buster: I've got nothing to be sorry for Rio: For God's sake Rio: I forgot how tiring you were Buster: It ain't my fault its been years since you've been able to keep up with me Rio: Please Rio: your memory is as selective as your participation Buster: Your memory is as unreliable as your mum's baby daddys Rio: I don't need this from you today Buster: Name a day you do need it, I'll check my calendar, like Rio: You're so unfunny Buster: I ain't the entertainment Buster: You wish Rio: Neither is my family Rio: sorry to disappoint Buster: It's alright, like I said, I'm used to you disappointing me Buster: Ancient history Rio: Heartbreaking Buster: It makes no odds to me if you can't hold your nerve, drink or your head high Buster: That's your problem Rio: None of which you'd know anything about Rio: you're the only one here with a problem, obviously Buster: Which one of us are you trying to convince? Buster: Either way, I'd work harder at it if I were you Rio: like permission, I definitely don't need your advice Rio: there's no need for conviction, you don't like me, I don't like you, it's simple Buster: There's every need for conviction when it's the pretence you're actually tired of Buster: I understand putting the one, big, happy family spin on things for the kids but we ain't that and you ain't supposed to buy into your own bullshit Buster: You don't wanna be here, don't put that on me Rio: Don't project your bullshit onto me Rio: You wouldn't know, because you don't, but I turn up to events Buster: Just own yours Buster: I know 'cause I can still read you, neither of us have to like it, but it's true Rio: Just leave me alone Rio: don't think about me Buster: Don't cry, you'll fuck up the photos Rio: You wish Buster: You wish I cared Rio: yeah Rio: pleasure, right Buster: [brings her a drink like drown your sorrows but doesn't stick around cos rude hoe] Rio: [gives it to her mans like no thank you] Buster: [LOL love that power move] Rio: [has to be done] Buster: [also how awkward that her man is at this fam function, please don't be cringe Caleb] Rio: [at least you're the least bothered in that sense, you know you bomb enough] Buster: [and you're your dad's fave too so best behaviour with you] Rio: [hopefully you're not looking as messy by this age sir] Buster: [good lord I hope not you'll be the one ruining those photos if you are] Rio: [just put him on the side so you can crop him out] Buster: [#mood and defs crop out shit nan] Rio: [she'll be on fine form, everyone hide she lives to shade] Buster: [Grace just crying cos she only a bab and she already getting shaded] Rio: [no prisoners baby] Buster: [no offense Meena but none of us are living rn] Rio: [soz your wedding is tense] Buster: [thank god there's not loads of them] Rio: [we been derailed though you two think of a flimsy excuse to talk again] Buster: [is Gus still alive or nah that's my last question I promise] Rio: [nah, if we said OG he died when Pablo, that's 22, so a year before the twins are born] Buster: [sad times] Rio: [okay so later, like a time that you've both had to be on it with the drinks etc] Rio: you find her? Buster: No Rio: you still want to? Buster: Forget it Buster: She wants to stay mad Rio: don't you approve of that though Buster: Of martyrdom? Fuck that Rio: nah Rio: being angry, doing your own thing Buster: If that was what she was doing Rio: well, she's with June, obviously Rio: but they seemed content enough Buster: Whatever Rio: Whatever then Rio: enjoy the remaining festivities Buster: Obviously Rio: not been that bad Rio: my nan thinks you're SO impressive, know you love that Buster: Compared to what? St Paddy's? Christmas? My 10th birthday? Buster: I know I'm impressive, I could give a fuck what she thinks Rio: What was wrong with your 10th birthday? Buster: What's wrong with any of them? It was just an example Rio: it sounded like some deep trauma you should repress is all Rio: maybe I already had, idk Buster: I can afford a good therapist, it'll be fine Rio: Yippee Buster: You don't have to lose any sleep over me, babe Buster: Dreams aside Rio: You've been working on your jokes Rio: glad you've spent your time wisely Buster: 'Course you are Buster: So invested in my success, yeah? Rio: Sure Rio: not that I spend enough time laughing at jokes that aren't funny without needlessly indulging you too or anything Buster: Dump your boyfriend then Buster: He's got fuck all going for him if he ain't funny Rio: How do you know I'm talking about him? Buster: Educated guess Buster: 'Cause I am Rio: Well you're wrong Rio: and my dad really isn't that funny Rio: or he thinks I'm still five Buster: I ain't wrong that he looks like he has to sign his name with a cross Buster: And I could've told you that, about your dad Rio: You're just being rude with no basis for it, but I'm not after help with my homework even if he was that thick so what would it matter Rio: I'm sure Rio: why didn't you offer you unnecessary, 'expert' opinion this time then? Buster: I have a solid basis for your lack of standards, but fair point, it doesn't really matter to me Buster: And 'cause you can't even accept my offer of a drink Rio: if high standards means being here alone, you can have it Rio: it wasn't an offer, it was parallel to assault with a 🍹 Buster: If you're that scared to be alone, I'll see you in the shrink's chair once we've given it at least a couple more years to let the trauma accumulate Buster: You never used to be so afraid of everything Rio: I'm no more scared of being alone than you're scared to be with someone Rio: what else am I meant to be afraid of? Buster: Other than acting like I threw a glass of straight brandy in your face? Rio: You weren't trying to give me a drink, you were trying to prove a point you didn't have Buster: Let's not pretend you have any idea what my motivations are/were/could be at any particular point in time Rio: I'd have to join in the delusion you aren't transparent first and honestly Rio: not got the time Buster: 'Cause you don't Buster: 'Course* Rio: Be well busy teaching my boyfriend to read and write, apparently Buster: There's so many delusions it must be necessary to maintain in order to just be with him that neither of us have the time to list them all Rio: It doesn't really matter to you, remember? Buster: Cheers for the reminder Rio: You're so welcome Buster: I feel it Buster: Your nan has such a welcoming vibe Rio: No doubt ⭐ boy Rio: try being your sister, or my brother Buster: She loves it Rio: Judging like God gave her the go ahead? Rio: I know Buster: I meant Nance loves a chance to play the victim, but yeah that too Rio: She'll be over it 'fore the night is out Buster: Don't underestimate her Rio: Yeah, that's me Buster: Well, everyone knows the opposite is reserved for your boyfriends Rio: I highly doubt anyone but you is thinking about it at all Buster: If that idea brings you comfort, you can have it Rio: How generous Buster: Why are you wearing that? Rio: What do you mean? Buster: It's a simple enough question Rio: Too simple for words Rio: because it's a wedding Rio: what else would I wear? Buster: I'm not your stylist Rio: then don't act like it Buster: I ain't Rio: Maybe I don't like what you're wearing Rio: you don't have to announce every thought in your head Buster: I didn't express an opinion, I asked a question Rio: I know what you're saying Buster: No you don't Rio: Then tell me Buster: You've already made it clear that you don't want me to Rio: That's why I asked you to Buster: I don't have to announce every thought in my head, remember? Rio: Fine Rio: well I'm not going home to change, can you handle that? Buster: What if I can't? Rio: I know you can Buster: Fine Rio: Do you want a drink? Buster: Are you gonna throw it at me? Rio: I've got manners Buster: Shame Rio: 😏 Rio: if you're missing playing, there's room at the kid's table Buster: I'm gutted that you don't wanna play a game with me, that doesn't mean you get to push your luck that far Rio: You don't seem like you're in a playful mood Buster: What mood do I seem like I'm in? Rio: So I can't read your motivations anymore but I can still read your moods? Buster: Come on Rio: You seem Rio: annoyed Rio: uncomfortable, like the rest of us Buster: Is that you finally admitting that you're uncomfortable? Rio: I never said I was having the BEST time Buster: Alright, let's have that drink then Rio: as far as non-solutions go Rio: one of the better Buster: You know me well enough to know if it ain't the best, I ain't interested Rio: That's why you ain't brought a plus one, yeah Buster: Yeah Rio: You seem bored too Buster: You don't have to read my mind for that one, it's just common sense Rio: So I'll get you that drink Buster: Cheers Rio: Slainte Rio: [gonna have you get waylaid by your dad and Drew at the bar] Buster: [when you come and literally drag her away from them when you realise cos you don't have to read her mind there either] Rio: [we all know Drew's already getting lowkey creepy at this age, never mind any dad angst or embarrassment 'thanks' as you awkwardly give him his drink] Buster: [when it's been so long since they've touched each other that he can't even speak so just gotta shake his head for that don't cos he didn't do it for the thanks] Rio: ['you already said it for the drink' and a shrug that you can barely keep steady and even because being this close to him but we're pretending this is very casual 'we're even'] Buster: [a shrug that exactly mirrors hers for that beautiful cinematography and matching mood but forcing that eye contact cos gotta pretend you're unfazed] Rio: [maintaining it long enough to take the first sip of your drink, then going to walk away again] Buster: [putting his hand on her wrist just like he did a second ago when he dragged her away from that delightful pair because we've started something now] Rio: [looking down at his hand on your wrist because you cannot] Buster: [unhanding her because you know you have to not because you want to] Rio: ['enjoy, yeah?' and looking back up as you go] Buster: [just staring at her nbd and nothing to see here people] Rio: [a shameless moment whilst you walk back to this boy] Buster: [excuse you sir] Rio: [like so soz her level of investment in you has plummeted rn] Buster: [I'm dying because this lad is probably saying something to her and does she care? NOPE] Rio: [tryna have your own moment like hold up] Buster: [Ava as the only other person he gives a fuck about at this whole function/in the world you've gotta distract him so he doesn't go over there/do something stupid] Rio: [at least you're 8 and will have no qualms in doing so] Buster: [have a cute moment between yourselves so he calms down] Rio: [ask him to dance or something] Buster: [you gotta] Rio: [not that this will help her, just sneakily looking how cute they are] Buster: [just casually reminding her of what a sweet boy he used to be when they were younger] Rio: [and he's good with kids which is so important to you for obvious reasons] Buster: [omg it makes so much sense why they have so many kids now even more than before] Rio: [mhmm Buster: [we is so clever] Rio: [the cleverest] Buster: What mood am I in now? Rio: A much better one Rio: even if you'd like to deny it Buster: I'm not about to deny it, she's the best thing my parents have ever done and you heard what I said that means for my interest Rio: It's nice Buster: I'm capable of nice Buster: It just suits everyone to forget it, including you Rio: I've never said you weren't Rio: it suits you for people to forget, anyway, if you wanted it otherwise, you'd remind them more often Buster: Not tonight, there'll have been others though Buster: Yeah, like I said, it suits everyone Rio: My memory isn't selective Rio: this night or any other Buster: Call it whatever you like Buster: The end result is the same Rio: No it isn't Buster: Tell me how it's any different Rio: I still have memories Rio: that you can't do fuck all about Buster: Memories that make no fucking difference to now Rio: That's your opinion Buster: It's a fact Buster: There isn't a single one you could share with me now or vice versa that would lead to our reconciliation Rio: because we don't want it Buster: 'Cause it's bullshit Buster: It might as well have happened to someone else for all the relevance it has to who I am Rio: Yeah, because you don't want it to make a difference Rio: that's what I said Buster: Yeah, you're the expert on what I want Rio: Don't need to be, that's what you're saying as well Buster: What I'm saying is that it doesn't matter, it's not about whether I want it to or not Rio: Fine Buster: There are loads of things that have a bearing on my day to day live and how it looks going forward, and like it or not, all the summers I wasted here with you as a kid ain't one of 'em, oddly enough Buster: *life Rio: as I said, WE don't want it to matter Rio: so, unsurprisingly, I don't care Buster: Say it like you mean it Buster: You're supposed to kill your darlings, babe, not give 'em the one punch and call it quits Rio: Whatever, have you sufficiently proved to yourself how un-nice you can be too now or? Buster: It's about what you don't wanna prove to yourself though, more than anything else Buster: You're scared if you really hurt me, you'll like it Buster: And you don't want that 'cause you do care, even if it's only for the me in your memories Rio: I'm not scared of that, or to admit I care, because I'm not a sociopath Rio: we're related, like it or not Buster: I'm not a sociopath just 'cause I don't like the fact we're related Rio: You'll get over it Buster: You're supposed to say, 'nah you're a sociopath 'cause....' I've probably got loads of the traits you could pick from Buster: But since you didn't, what if I can't? Rio: I don't think you are one, your narcissistic trait will take that blow hard, I know Rio: There's no choice Rio: I've got plenty of relatives I like less than you, as you're aware Rio: they don't just go away, even if you try to Buster: There are always choices and there are always gonna be relatives I like less than you Buster: But Rio, what if I can't get over this? Rio: Don't take the piss Buster: I mean it, you know I do Rio: Then you know I don't have an answer Buster: You have to if I don't Rio: The only way blood doesn't matter is if the person fucks up so spectacularly you can disown them Rio: even then, not really Rio: so yeah, have some kids you don't want, acquire a drug habit that you do Buster: I've got the latter, I can't say it's especially helping Rio: not really though Rio: just at parties, yeah Buster: You don't have to worry about me Rio: I'm not, just asked a question Buster: I go to parties all the time so it's hardly an occasional thing, but alright, to answer your question, yeah Rio: everyone does though, like Rio: that's alright, that's normal Buster: Only you would find a way to be insulting and reassuring at the same time Rio: Yeah, I'm well sorry if you thought you and your friends were unique Buster: Not those cunts, just me Rio: That's very nice Buster: So are they Rio: Why are you friends with them? Buster: If not those cunts then a bunch of others Rio: But I'm afraid to be alone? Buster: [a big Fearghal style loud lol] Buster: Touché Rio: [shaking her head like 😏] Buster: You reckon I should be more like Nance then, yeah? Isolate myself and pretend human connection is unneccessary Rio: Obviously not Rio: No one wants to be alone Buster: No one's good enough for me, babe Buster: You were the first to prove it Rio: Fuck off Rio: you so obviously fit right in with your friends, that's the truth Buster: I give it 110% same as everything else Rio: I never had any doubt Buster: Good Rio: Even if I had, your socials leave little to be desired in the twat factor Buster: And yet, you can't look away Rio: if you think a car crash is aspirational Buster: You may be one of my poor relations, that doesn't make me a poster boy Buster: Find your own access to high society, Eliza Rio: I'm not your anything Rio: and I've got no interest in that either Buster: Well done then, on both counts Rio: Bye now Buster: For now Rio: Unfortunately Buster: Fuck off Rio: excuse you? Buster: Lie better or don't bother Rio: You can pretend I'm just devastated to see you go, if it makes you happy Buster: That isn't something I need to pretend Rio: There you go, head in the ☁s again Rio: you're welcome Buster: You wish Buster: Stop daydreaming about me, the nights are already so fucking long Rio: You're lucky I don't tell people how weird you are Buster: Go ahead Rio: You think I won't Buster: I dare you Rio: Don't Buster: I double dare you Rio: You know I can't Rio: no one would believe just how weird you are Buster: You can do anything you want, you just have to want it more than you care about what the consequences are/could be Rio: I'm sure they'd just put you in very expensive therapy Buster: And I wouldn't have to see you any more Rio: That's what you want then Buster: Don't you? Rio: I already said, there are people I dislike more around Buster: You know there's only so many boyfriends you can parade in front of me before I kill one Rio: You're not going to kill anyone, you're not a sociopath, remember Rio: and I'm not parading anyone, they're just there Buster: Just saying, like Buster: You might wanna reconsider your rankings Buster: And I didn't say I wouldn't feel guilt or whatever else Rio: Of course you wanna be on top Buster: You don't want me to be? Rio: Why would I want that, Buster? Buster: You know why Rio: Not when me and all the wasted Summers as kids are nothing but a footnote Buster: Don't Rio: You said it Buster: What would you rather I said? Buster: Tell me Rio: Not every thought in my head Buster: Come on Rio: What do you want me to say? Buster: A thought in your head, not every Rio: Alright Rio: you're pretty drunk, that's what I'm thinking Buster: I'm not that drunk, if that's what's stopping you Rio: I could say more if you were Buster: I'll find some brandy, you can say it at my funeral Rio: Things aren't that dire, come on Rio: they're quite a sweet couple Buster: If you say so Rio: you don't think so? Buster: I don't know what kind of couple they are Buster: I barely know them Rio: Yeah but it's a nice story Rio: very boy/girl next door romcom Buster: Knowing what you want in the first place is a better story Buster: They wasted years they could've been together Rio: They might not have been right for each other before Buster: If you're right for each other then you are Buster: You do whatever it takes Rio: Maybe Rio: sometimes you can't Buster: They were the only things stopping themselves Rio: So you can't be happy for them? Buster: I didn't say I wasn't Rio: You still want a supermodel wife then Buster: I don't care what she does, it's not about that Rio: What is it about Buster: What she's like, obviously Rio: You have grown up Buster: It's what happens, yeah Buster: Unless you die Rio: Cheery Buster: I told you, I ain't the entertainment Rio: Alright Buster: Don't marry him Rio: I'm not marrying anyone Buster: Ever? Rio: I mean right now, we're 14, for God's sake Buster: You can't marry him now, I'm saying don't marry him when you're old enough to Rio: we've not been going out long Rio: who knows where I'll be or with who when I even think about that Buster: You fancied him back then though, when I was gonna marry a supermodel Buster: I know you did Rio: that's not what I was trying to say with Rio: I don't think I'll marry him Rio: it's just nice for the people it happens to Rio: like your mum and dad too Buster: Probably use an alternative word to nice if you say anything about it to them Rio: I wasn't planning to Rio: not got a deathwish Buster: [😏] Buster: It wouldn't be very cheery, having one Rio: Doesn't mean I'm the entertainment Rio: just polite Buster: Just as well, polite isn't entertaining Rio: If I wanted to entertain you, I could Buster: But you don't Rio: don't I Buster: Do you? Rio: be well weird if I wanted to, wouldn't it Buster: Depends who you ask Rio: You're the only one in this chat Rio: but not in the room Buster: Rio Rio: yes Buster: Do you wanna dance with me or not? Rio: We could do that Rio: that wouldn't be weird Buster: [comes over and we back on that wrist holding bullshit because of course we are, like you could just let her walk over to wherever you're gonna dance but no] Buster: [stop pulling her around boy you'll give yourself away] Rio: [we all know she's so shamelessly #intoit so good luck keeping this casual] Buster: [remember where you are and that your whole family is here please] Rio: [we know we're starting with a pretense of dancing 'near' each other but just keep 'accidentally' touching and getting closer] Buster: [shamelessly love that] Rio: [like you can't outright slow dance can you even if you really wanna] Buster: [we'll let you at the party but there's no chance of getting away with it in front of the fam unless you somehow did a Twilight prom moment outside lol] Rio: [wish some of these kids would take the initiative to 'force' you to like you're getting fake married lmao] Buster: [@Grace it's your time to shine babe] Rio: [god bless] Buster: [realistically her boyfriend is probably gonna appear to dance with her properly and Buster is gonna be livid] Rio: [sadly, yes, neither of us are thrilled but can't be like no I would rather keep dancing with my cousin so, just sadly watching him go over your mans shoulder] Buster: [he has to go punch something that's not this dude's face] Rio: [don't blame you] Buster: [please don't hurt yourself boy, I know you don't care but it is a wedding thank you] Rio: [at the very least, you don't want the drama of the whole fam being like what happened why etc etc] Buster: [genau dr phil] Rio: [even later, like, Tommy and Meena have pissed off time, which is so weird about traditional weddings] Rio: where are you Buster: Why? Rio: just asking Rio: i wanna know Buster: Well don't Rio: sorry Buster: Where's he? I wanna know Rio: he went home a while ago Rio: paper round in the morning Buster: He's tall for a 10 year old Rio: alright Rio: you can have that one on the house Buster: Why can't he get a real job? He's old enough Buster: Older than you Rio: I don't know Rio: doesn't want one, doesn't need one Rio: his family are minted Buster: Who the fuck doesn't want one? Rio: Are you gonna get one? Rio: he's focusing on school, like Buster: What's he focusing on a paper round for too then, cardio? Rio: Probably Rio: why are we even talking about this, it's so boring Buster: Why are you even going out with him, if he's so boring? Rio: do you actually want to know, really Buster: Yeah I do Rio: 'cos it's easy, simple, straightforward Buster: Jesus Christ Rio: what Buster: What do you mean, what? Buster: Can you hear yourself Rio: There's literally nothing wrong with that Buster: If you're a divorced mother of two looking to get back out there Buster: Instead of like, the hottest girl I've ever seen Rio: you can't say that Buster: I can say whatever the fuck I want Buster: I can't do anything Rio: you're Rio: this is a headfuck Buster: It always has been Rio: I know Buster: Yeah Rio: that's why we need easy Buster: Fuck that Rio: fine, be better than me Buster: There is no better than you Rio: Buster Rio: just Buster: I don't care Buster: It's true Rio: we can't do anything with this Rio: what do we do Buster: You should know anyway Buster: How I feel and how I don't Rio: you aren't as good a liar as you'd like Rio: you can't just talk away this, or one of us would've Buster: I mean you should hear it from me Buster: Instead of all the bullshit you have to Rio: okay Rio: I'm listening Buster: When I see you I can barely stay standing but when I don't, I can't fucking breathe Buster: If I was anyone else I wouldn't win the fight, it'd get called off Rio: I miss you, like, I always miss you, since we were little Buster: It's just constant Buster: Everyone acts like it's meant to get better, or worse Rio: we should've grown out of it by now Rio: probably Buster: Don't Rio: I can't Rio: and I don't think I want to, even if I could Buster: I know what I want, I'm not a kid Rio: you want a lot of things Rio: if we Rio: that could fuck up all the rest Buster: Yeah Rio: but Rio: do you ever feel like Rio: if we did, it'd be less obvious somehow Rio: I feel as blatant as you say I am Buster: I don't reckon it could be any more obvious, whatever we do Buster: Is that why your boyfriend left? Rio: Sort of Rio: he wanted me to go with him but I didn't feel like it Rio: for obvious reasons Buster: I'm not sorry Rio: I know you aren't Rio: I don't need you to be either Buster: What do you need from me then? Rio: I want you Rio: to admit you want me too Buster: You said I want loads of things, but none of them matter as much as you Rio: what if no one would talk to us again Buster: I'll talk to you and you'll talk to me Rio: promise Rio: you can't ignore me Buster: You're right, I can't Rio: you do though Rio: so don't Buster: I swear Rio: okay Buster: It will be okay Rio: when have you ever been okay with okay Buster: Touché Buster: Fine, it'll be the best Rio: it would be though Buster: I know Rio: think about it Buster: I've been thinking about it for days Buster: I went to a party last night to try and stop Rio: did it work Buster: 'Course not Buster: I don't want it enough Rio: I don't want him enough Rio: I said it's easy Rio: but it's the opposite, actually Rio: on paper, it should be but when I actually have to do it Buster: You don't live on paper Buster: And you don't have to be with him Rio: we have to try, don't we Buster: We have Rio: how is just seeing you better than anything anyone else has ever done Buster: I'm better than anyone else Rio: you just want me to say it back Buster: That's not why I said it, but obviously you will, when I prove it to you Rio: I wish Buster: [a location that a wedding guest should not remotely be like an office or storage closet or whatever where he's been] Rio: have you been there this whole time Buster: Why is that all you've got to say to me? Rio: You know I'm coming Rio: I started this conversation asking where you were Buster: How long ago did he leave? Rio: not long after Tommy and Meena did Rio: whenever that was Buster: You just wanted to keep me waiting then Rio: that's not what I want at all Buster: Good Rio: you know what I want, yeah? Buster: I know exactly what you want Rio: and you're gonna give it to me, right? Buster: I'm gonna give you everything Buster: Including things you didn't know you wanted Rio: Jesus Buster: Rio Rio: you can say that out loud for me Rio: we've not been that alone in Rio: forever, maybe Buster: We've never been this alone Rio: it's weird Rio: how many memories I have that feel like just me and you Rio: but they couldn't have been, really Buster: 'Cause that's how we wanted it Rio: bit mean, really Rio: but I'm always with my brother and sisters Buster: I don't care Rio: it's hard to, right now Rio: and then Rio: you were more fun Buster: I still am Rio: you can prove that Rio: if I ever escape everyone trying to stop and talk to me Buster: Don't make me have to come and get you Buster: We may have been blatant but we can't be stupid Rio: I know Rio: even if you did make that sound really tempting Rio: unfair Buster: I'll do it, I just want you to know that I know it's not a good idea Rio: I'll be good Rio: but only in a fun way, obviously Buster: You don't have fuck all to prove to me, you know that, yeah? Rio: yeah Rio: a bit though Buster: I'm serious Buster: You've never been boring, not even close Rio: I'm still gonna make this the best you've ever Buster: It will be 'cause it's you Rio: I need you to feel how badly I want you Buster: I've wanted you for so long Rio: how long Rio: tell me Buster: Come on Buster: You know it's always been you Rio: remind me Buster: Any girl I've ever touched, I've never even wanted to unless I'm thinking about you Rio: I can't stop my brain from thinking about you Rio: how much better it would be if it was you Rio: how much I'd rather Buster: Don't stop thinking about me Buster: If this is the only chance we get or if it's not Buster: Whatever happens, whatever I say or do when I sober up Rio: I can't anyway Rio: even if you were the worst person in the world Buster: I have been a cunt Buster: I'm sorry Rio: forget about it Rio: me too Rio: we know why Buster: No, listen Rio: but it's okay Buster: It's not okay Buster: I love you Rio: you can't just take all this back Rio: just 'cos we're drunk Buster: It'll still be how I feel whether I'm drunk or not Rio: I mean you know I'm not going to forget Buster: Good, don't Buster: I'm in love with you Rio: I've imagined you saying that Rio: so many times Buster: It's real now Buster: I mean, it always has been real for me, but I'm actually saying it, no takebacks Rio: [gonna have you turn up now] Buster: [how obviously he would've trashed whatever this room is when he was mad and sad lol] Rio: [just looking at the room then at him 'cos we doing this] Buster: [using whatever to block the door because you haven't waited this long to risk getting interrupted however unlikely that is given how long he's been in there and how far away they are from the wedding shit] Rio: [gonna say it's an office type moment so it can be a desk and you can hop up on that] Buster: [because your height difference is ridiculous and also that's a mood] Rio: ['is this really happening?'] Buster: [kissing her really intensely so she knows it is and let's take a moment to appreciate and contrast that to their awkward childish first one and die] Rio: [when you'd be dying because how good it is confirms everything like oh shit] Buster: [we know it'd be the same for him so thank god you don't have to worry about being quiet because he is the loudest character we have lol] Rio: [if there was ever a time and a place for a first time moment tbh] Buster: [love it for you guys even though he's gonna have to tell her to take off her own dress so he doesn't rip it cos we that extra and peeps would notice that however drunk and oblivious they have been thusfar] Rio: [when you're so 😍 about that though] Buster: [no chill ever gotta start as you mean to go on] Rio: [likewise, just taking the opportunity to tell him everything you ain't been allowed in between kisses] Buster: [same cos he's already dropped the L word before she even got there so we know he can't shut his damn mouth] Rio: [there's no way she ain't saying it back in person] Buster: [I'm the opposite of mad about it] Rio: [when you can't pretend you don't, like it's just all out there now you've started, tomorrow will be interesting] Buster: [good lord I hope at least you can manage to keep the bruises to a minimum/out of sight of the boyfriend she still has because yeah there's gonna be enough to deal with] Rio: [good luck with that lmao] Buster: [gurl you gonna have to work some makeup magic we all know it] Rio: [or just avoid him like we know you wanna] Buster: [please dump him asap though] Rio: [we clearly are and it'll probably be messy 'cos thinks you've liked him for ages and like yeah you been cute but also not really] Buster: [soz boy but also not soz boy] Rio: [you'll survive honey] Buster: [but for them what is the craic like are y'all gonna stay barricaded in here forever or go back to the reception like nothing happened or go home like you have not thought this through] Rio: [you can probably stay in here 'til one of your parents texts like excuse me where are you, and that'll probably be to go home] Buster: [realistically Baze will wanna go home before Ali cos her and Tommy are besties and baze are antisocial bastards lol] Rio: [exactly dr phil, when you just both gotta think about that like okay] Buster: [giving her his jacket cos 1. he wants her to have it because this may never happen again/all the reminders as if you haven't literally left bruises boy please 2. nobody would question why he doesn't have it/she does because the state of them all and the fact it's not an inherently coupley thing to do necessarily 3. if she had to she could say it was her boyfriends because he is also a rich boy and boys suits lowkey always look the same unless you go wild with it 4. that'll give her a reason to have to see him again/strike up a convo which he obvs wants and so do we] Rio: [1. yes 2. yes 3. yes 4. yes that is all, do we wanna have any more drunk chatting 'cos easily could or do we wanna skip to the AM] Buster: [I think we should to show they're not like instantly regretting/ignoring each other cos that's not the mood like all the goodbye kisses as soon as he realises he can't just ignore the fam/actually has to go would be EVERYTHING] Rio: [truly, hence he's barely out the door and] Rio: I miss you Buster: I love you Rio: I love you a lot Buster: I love you more than anything else Rio: You're making me so happy Buster: Good Rio: I wish I coulda gone with you Buster: You are coming with me, just not in person Rio: Yeah, I know Rio: I just like you best in person Buster: I'll see you tomorrow Rio: What are we doing? Buster: Whatever you want Rio: you then, cool 😋 Rio: might be willing to make a more detailed plan in the AM, see how I feel Buster: I'm fine with plan A Rio: It'd be really beyond awkward if you were regretting it already Rio: so I'm glad to hear it Buster: Being forced to leave, not doing it sooner, how I've treated you for the past however fucking long, that shit is what I regret Rio: We'll find time to make up for the lost now Rio: you're here for a bit, yeah? Buster: Yeah Rio: Good Rio: it won't be that hard to find time and opportunity to be alone somewhere Rio: can't force family fun on us constantly Rio: they'll be recovering from this majority of the time Buster: They can't force fuck all on me, I came 'cause I wanted to see you Rio: Well, I'm very glad you did Buster: Me too Rio: I swear I'm dreaming Buster: You're not, babe Buster: I can still taste you Rio: Fuck Rio: that makes me weak Buster: Everything you do makes me weak Buster: Just as well you can't tell anyone, like Rio: Who, me? 😏 Rio: I'd rather it was just for me anyway Buster: Yeah, you Buster: You know exactly what you're doing Buster: That dress, for example Rio: If you're going to ignore me, I have to make sure it's as hard as it is for me to ignore you Rio: the smallest but only victory I reckoned available to me Buster: I understand not reckoning I was gonna rip it off you but don't sell yourself too short Rio: so, you're only human, and everyone's looking Rio: but you know I wore it for you Buster: I do, so just this once I'll forgive you for saying I'm only human Rio: 😂 Rio: we can brainstorm what I can call you instead then Buster: Like, if you were disappointed in any of what I just did, you could've just said so Buster: Don't have to humble me that hard Rio: Oh, please Rio: you know what you just did Rio: and that I've not recovered, can't see it happening any time soon Buster: It's taken me years to try and recover from the first time we kissed, I'm not sure you'll find me that sympathetic, given that I never did succeed Rio: I get it, I'm not sorry for that either Rio: even if I should be Rio: only sorry we didn't do it more than once Buster: I should've kissed you every day after that Rio: You should've Buster: You know failure isn't an option for me though Rio: It wasn't a failure Buster: It wasn't good enough, that's the same thing Rio: it still made me feel Rio: everything Buster: But you're flawless, it needed to be perfect Rio: I wasn't any better, it was both our first time Rio: how could you have done any better, at, how old were we even Buster: If I hadn't been a pussy about it then it would've been better Rio: well, I still thought about it every time I touched myself after so Rio: I'm not mad about it Buster: Jesus, don't say shit like that when I can't touch myself at the thought of you doing it, you're supposed to be the one with good manners Rio: but you like it when I forget them Buster: Yeah but there's a time and a place and it's not right now in this car with my entire family Rio: 🤐 Rio: sorry Buster: No you're not Rio: I could be persuaded to be Rio: but I like thinking about it a lot, so it'll take a lot Buster: Tell me Rio: Tell you how much it'll take or how much I like thinking about it and exactly what Buster: Tell me what you like to think about and I'll decide if I want you to be sorry or not Rio: What haven't I thought about you, that's an easier question Rio: all the things I want you to do to me, everything I'm going to do for you Buster: Your boyfriend gives you easy, I know what you actually need Rio: you do Rio: you're better than a boyfriend Buster: I told you, I'm better than anyone Buster: Except you Rio: I'll show you that I know Buster: So how many of 'em did I do, these things you want? Rio: I'm pretty perverted Rio: we won't run out of scenarios or settings any time soon Buster: Is that a promise? Rio: Yes Rio: if you want it to be Buster: I want you here but I'll take that Rio: tomorrow Rio: I'm going to be so desperate for you Buster: Fuck that, I'll call you when I get back Rio: You know I'll still be at this party Buster: So go back to where we were Rio: Tell me when you're back, if I go now I won't be able to wait for you Buster: You don't have to wait for me Rio: I do Rio: I want you to fuck me and yourself at the same time Buster: Have I fallen asleep? Buster: I've definitely had this dream Rio: if you were asleep, I could make you cum Rio: can't be blamed for a wet dream Buster: If I'm not, I'll pretend to be Buster: Only my mum and dad aren't Rio: do you know how to be quiet though, babe Buster: I can do anything Rio: then can you think about me being there with you in the car Rio: tell me how you want me Buster: If you're on my lap I can be quiet Rio: I'll have a lot more bruises to show for it Rio: but I want that Buster: Any sounds I did end up making would only be for you to hear, I know you want that too Rio: They are just for me Buster: They haven't always been, our neighbours have definitely heard me before, but now they are Buster: And they're always 'cause of you Rio: I love how loud you are Rio: I wanna hear it more Buster: Tomorrow Rio: but for now, I can make noise for the both of us Buster: Yeah, be really loud for me Rio: I will Rio: though if I'm on your lap you'll have to try and make me quiet Buster: It's okay, I'll give you my fingers to suck, it'll keep you so quiet Rio: 🥺😳🤤 Rio: please Buster: Say it again Rio: Buster, please Rio: I want you inside me in every way possible at once Rio: you can't be close enough Buster: Fuck Rio: I can almost feel it Buster: Tell me what it feels like Rio: like I can't breathe, can't think, like all I can feel is what you're doing to my pussy, how fucking good it feels Buster: But you can feel what you're doing to me too, can't you? Rio: Of course, how could I not Rio: you're really big Buster: And everyone moves loads in their sleep Buster: I can't be blamed for that either Rio: Not at all Rio: and I can't be blamed that there's no room in the car but on you Buster: 'Course not Rio: though obviously, I wouldn't want a seat if there was one Buster: Obviously, you want what I want Rio: you know I don't have any underwear on, don't you Buster: I can tell Buster: It's allowed to be the one thing you're allowed to make easy, I reckon Rio: I can't help but be easy for you Rio: if you don't like it, you'll have to teach me a lesson Buster: You're so wet that you can easily take all of me but that's my fault, not yours, I can't help doing things that I know you'll really like Buster: Or that I want to give you everything Rio: I'm ready for you, daddy Buster: You love me, yeah? Rio: I love you so much Rio: you're just Rio: you're mine, aren't you? Buster: I'm yours and you're mine Rio: I'm all yours Rio: for always Buster: Forever Buster: It's always been me and you and that's never gonna change Rio: Promise Rio: I need you to stay with me Buster: I'll swear on whatever you want me to Buster: You know I need you more Rio: I'll believe you, because the alternative is not and I can't handle that Rio: I want this so badly, however we make it happen and work Buster: You can trust me Buster: Whatever it takes, I'll literally do anything for you Buster: There's never been a time when I wouldn't have Rio: Don't leave me again, okay Rio: I'm too happy right now Buster: There are no words good enough, I'll prove that I'm not going to with my actions though, okay? Rio: Okay Rio: I do trust you, really, and I do know, knew, how you felt this whole time, really Rio: it's just a headfuck how fast we've gone from the pretense to none at all Buster: I can't remember wanting to go anywhere without you, not for a single day from when my memory starts Buster: It was a headfuck how much of my life revolved around being with you or wishing I could be Buster: But I'm not a kid any more, I'm not scared Buster: And nobody can tell me what to do Rio: I thought I could make your life better, and mine too, I won't pretend it was entirely selfless, if we kept as much distance as possible Rio: that those thoughts and feelings would go away, that it'd be better for you to hate me, even if that fucking killed me Rio: but it just, didn't work, nothing was better Rio: lots of shit was much worse, and I missed you like hell Buster: I know Buster: I've been able to do everything I've ever decided I wanted to and loads of things I just had to, really fucking well, except not love you Rio: you can love me now Rio: shouldn't I be the only person who's say so matters Rio: I want you to Rio: and to love you back Buster: You're the only person who matters to me like that, end of story Rio: we'd be good together Rio: everyone would think so if things were different Buster: You were my best friend too, you know that, even my fucking twin couldn't understand me the way you did Buster: Whenever something happened whether it was shit or good I just wanted to tell you Buster: We were good together, they made things different, took all of that away from me Rio: I know Rio: we can have that again, if nothing else Rio: why shouldn't we Rio: you can tell me anything Buster: Fuck everyone else Buster: I hate them Rio: No you don't, not everyone Buster: Alright, the majority then Rio: 😏 okay, probably Rio: but shh Buster: Don't shh me, you just said I could tell you anything Rio: I suppose I did Rio: you didn't realize I'm a really crap girlfriend Buster: I've already realised that's bullshit Rio: Dan would probably disagree Rio: if he knew, like Buster: Yeah well, he'd love to disagree with me purely for the sake of doing so Buster: And I'd rather we had fuck all in common Rio: I mean, more like the bruises he didn't give me but you know Rio: I'll dump him Rio: when you've gone Buster: That's his own fault, if you were my girlfriend I wouldn't leave without you Rio: I didn't want to go Buster: He should've stayed with you then Rio: I didn't want that either Buster: Behave, you know what I'm saying Rio: I'm just saying Rio: not as stupid as you reckon Buster: Him or you? Rio: him Rio: I don't think you called me stupid, not tonight anyway Buster: Is that why you like him? Buster: It shouldn't be, 'cause if anything he's stupider than I reckoned for not being willing to put up a fight for you Rio: No Rio: it's just, I already knew him, when we came back properly Rio: didn't really know anyone else Buster: And you already fancied him Rio: not really Rio: he was cute but Rio: you didn't put me on your list either Buster: I could've told you puberty wasn't gonna do him as many favours as me Buster: I'm not that stupid, babe, then or now Buster: I know I can't marry you Rio: it was just a game Rio: you could've pretended Buster: I don't wanna pretend with you Rio: Do you even want all this Rio: you know, the wedding, the church Buster: I want you Buster: Nobody's gonna let us celebrate it by buying us toasters and champagne flutes, but if we could, I would Rio: yeah Rio: it don't matter Buster: We still belong to each other Buster: And I still choose you Rio: I'd rather have you than any of that Buster: It doesn't have to be either/or Buster: It can't look like theirs but we can do whatever we want in secret Rio: you're so cute Buster: I'm just saying, if you want something I'll get it for you Buster: Whatever it is Buster: I'm not your shit boyfriend, I don't give up Rio: you don't need to get me anything Rio: just stay in my life, that's all Rio: even if you have to marry a supermodel Buster: If I can't marry you, I won't get married Rio: it's a deal Buster: Okay Rio: I love you, Buster Buster: I've missed you so much Rio: I know Rio: I haven't even asked how you've been Rio: what you've been doing, 'cos it's been forever Buster: Don't Rio: I don't wanna know or you don't wanna say Rio: or both Buster: You already know Rio: but you're alright, yeah? Buster: I never settle for just alright, do I? Rio: you know what I mean Buster: What do you want me to say? Rio: you don't have to lie Rio: tell me how I can make it better though Buster: It is better now Buster: Like I said earlier, you don't have to worry about me Buster: Even if it wasn't better, I can handle that Rio: 😔 Buster: Come on Rio: 🥺 Rio: okay Buster: Please don't be sad Rio: I just can't think of you being sad Buster: I'm not any more Buster: I've got you Rio: it'll be better Rio: I'll look after you Buster: I love you Rio: I love you too Rio: I swear I don't even know half the people who are still here Buster: You should be here with me Buster: This house is so fucking quiet Rio: I could easily change that Rio: maybe we can have a sleepover one night Buster: We can Rio: like old times Rio: but better Buster: I won't headbutt you this time, like Rio: 😂 Rio: I appreciate it Buster: Did I ever do anything right as a kid or what? Buster: Fucking hell Rio: Plenty of things Rio: we know there was more stopping us than any awkwardness that happened Buster: Yeah Rio: but fuck that now Rio: they've got no right or need to know Buster: Don't worry, I've learned from my parents what not to do Buster: We won't get caught Rio: neither of us is stupid Rio: I want you too bad to fuck with it Buster: All we have to do is keep things the way they used to be in front of everyone Rio: we've kept it up for ages Rio: at least now, we know it's 100% fake Rio: no doubt Buster: Exactly Rio: You do have to come back more though Rio: or I'll die Buster: I'll think of a reason Rio: Use your big, educated brain, boy 😜 Buster: An idea'll come easily once you're not distracting me Rio: not even sent you any pictures Buster: Me either Buster: But I should shower so Buster: Maybe I will Rio: How many pleases do I have to say to make that maybe a definitely? Buster: Let's see Rio: 🙏 Buster: You have to say it though Rio: Hmm, emojis aren't gonna cut it, noted Rio: Pleeeeaaaaaase Buster: Like you mean it Rio: Insincerity either, okay Rio: Please though Buster: Please, what? Rio: Please send me pictures of you Buster: [does obviously] Rio: More Buster: [he's extra so you know he will] Rio: you're perfect Buster: For you Rio: only for me Buster: Yeah Rio: all for me Buster: I'm all yours now Rio: not gonna take any pictures of my face 'cos I'm just 🥴 now Buster: You're beautiful Rio: That's you Buster: It's not a competition, thank Christ Rio: Awh, baby Rio: I'd let you win Buster: You winning means I win Rio: then you're so welcome Buster: Good Rio: [sends pics from the desk] Buster: We're gonna have to break back in before I leave Rio: or find another desk Buster: I'm looking at one right now, trying to decide whether or not it would break Buster: You'll have to tell me what you think, when you come over Rio: oh Rio: or we could just try and hope for the best Buster: Okay, I'll protect you if it does collapse Rio: I know you will Rio: you love me Buster: And you trust me Rio: with my life Buster: I'll never let anything or anyone hurt you Rio: Only you Rio: and only how I like it Rio: 'cos you know me better than anyone Buster: Some of those bruises are gonna be there after I've left Rio: mhmm Rio: they need to be Rio: I need all the reminders we can get away with Buster: You can have as many as I've got time to give you Rio: you're so lovely 🥰 Rio: I'll take pictures every day, show you how they're healing Buster: Don't forget Rio: Never Rio: when they've nearly disappeared, you come back, yeah Buster: 'Course Rio: 🧡 Buster: Rio Rio: yeah? Buster: Tomorrow, things won't just go back to the way they were before, will they? Rio: I can't do it Rio: I seriously can't Buster: You know I mean everything I've said, yeah? Rio: Yes, and I'm not going to forget any of it Buster: Please don't Rio: I promise Buster: I'll say it all again if I have to but Rio: How could I forget Rio: when I've wanted to hear all of this for so long Buster: You know why Rio: but we can do it Rio: we can keep this secret Rio: I can't go back, can't do what we were Rio: I was bad at it Buster: We both were Buster: And you know how much I fucking hate being bad at things Rio: So, jump with me Rio: you can't keep one foot on the ledge, like Buster: That a dare? Rio: I'd rather you want it, if it's all the same to you Rio: but I can't say I'm above it Buster: You're all I want Buster: The rest, it's not just for me Rio: then I'm yours and that's all there is to it Rio: we'll work out logistics in the morning Buster: If you aren't still there, like Rio: 🙄 Rio: the twins are 💤 in the coats Buster: My dad had to carry Ava in, she wasn't waking up for anything or anyone Rio: Don't blame her Rio: I'm about my ma's size but don't reckon I'm getting away with it Buster: Are you tired, baby? Rio: You know I am, its your fault Buster: I can carry you tomorrow Rio: I'm gonna dream about it Buster: If I can fall asleep, I will too Rio: I'll make sure you do first Rio: manners, babe Buster: I don't think that's the reputation I want though Rio: who am I telling suddenly 🤨 Buster: Not the point is it Rio: You don't need to prove anything to me Rio: there's nothing you haven't already, like Buster: There's always more to prove Rio: I won't complain Rio: show me how good you are so I can't ever forget Rio: 🤤🤤🤤 Buster: [a video because we starting as we mean to go on as being extra bitches] Rio: BABY Buster: I told you Rio: but Rio: that's not allowed Buster: Are you complaining after you said you wouldn't? Rio: No Rio: What's the opposite of complaining? Buster: So you approve? Buster: I'll take the praise then Rio: My nan will love you even more Rio: got me on my knees Buster: Another reason to keep the secret as I obviously can't risk losing her admiration Rio: Obviously Rio: though I'd love the chance to get her to hate me more Buster: We can do that Rio: can we? Buster: You know me, trouble follows me anywhere, it's not limited to Chelsea's confines Rio: Stop tempting me, but don't ever Buster: It's a deal, babe Rio: You have no idea how bored I was without you around Buster: Yeah I do, I've had to entertain myself Buster: Nobody else can come close to keeping up Rio: well you are very entertaining Rio: so I'm jealous of you, if anything Buster: You and everyone else who has had the privilege of meeting me, like Rio: 😏 Rio: you're adorable Buster: Seriously though, all the girls I was talking to earlier were so fucking boring Rio: earlier today or in general Buster: I meant earlier, as in when you were busy with your boyfriend, but it's not any different in general Rio: Hmm Buster: What? Rio: Nothing Buster: Come on Rio: Really, nothing Buster: Bullshit Buster: Say what you wanna say Rio: I just don't like thinking about it Buster: It's not something you have to think about any more Rio: I know, just being stupid Buster: Don't Buster: You're not stupid Buster: I shouldn't have said it, I just meant that I'm lucky to have you Rio: I really know, ignore me, well, ignore that Buster: No Buster: 'Cause if I ignore it you'll still be thinking about it, but without telling me that you are Buster: Then I can't make you feel better Rio: I don't want you to think I'm like that though Buster: Would you rather I think you don't care? Rio: No Rio: you know I do though Rio: but I'm not a crazy bitch, or only a bit Buster: I wanted to kill your boyfriend as soon as I saw you with him, I don't reckon there's any room for me to judge Rio: that's what I wanted though, at least partly Buster: I'll happily kill him for you, it'd be easy Rio: 🙄 that is NOT what I meant, let the record show Rio: asking you to commit murder seems like a further down the line deal tbh but appreciate the level of commitment, baby Buster: Let the record show that I'm planning to say he started it by smacking me with a newspaper Buster: And also that I know exactly what you actually meant Rio: 😂 Rio: point is, it's only my business if you make it so, and you didn't bring no plus one so Buster: You wouldn't have been jealous if I had Buster: It's too obvious that I don't give a shit Rio: I definitely would have Rio: it doesn't take much, not with you Buster: Maybe but so would whoever this hypothetical girl is 'cause wherever you are is the only place I'm looking Rio: Risky Rio: lucky boys aren't that bright usually Rio: or maybe no one's mind goes there, you know Buster: If hers had it'd be easy to turn around, but gaslighting isn't really my idea of a fun night Rio: can think of better Buster: You and me both Rio: though now isn't the perfect time for vivid fuck flashbacks as it looks like my mum might actually be ready to go Buster: I reckon you meant to say that actually there couldn't be a more perfect time Rio: damn, payback is swift Rio: I just forgot you were in the car with your fam, I swear 🤞 Buster: [hitting her with all those reminders of everything that happened in such glorious detail because he is that bitch 100% like okay if your memory is that 'unreliable' don't forget that this or this happened] Rio: like Rio: I deserved that but I don't deserve you Rio: oh my God Buster: You deserve more Buster: [Hitting her with everything he's gonna do to her tomorrow because 100% that bitch too] Rio: Buster Buster: Rio Rio: I want you now Rio: be here Buster: I'm here Rio: Make me feel better Buster: [we're obvs going in even harder with what it would be like if they were actually together rn, he may not have jimothy's way with words but the enthusiasm and urgency are unparalleled] Rio: I'm gonna need your fingers again Rio: or my lips are gonna be unholy big from the bruising Buster: Then you better take 'em Buster: Or I'll have to just kiss you everywhere else tomorrow Rio: can't I have both? Buster: 'Course you can Rio: You spoil me Buster: You deserve that too Rio: I am being really good Buster: How good? Rio: My legs are crossed and my mouth is 🤐 Rio: you'd be proud Buster: Oh I am Buster: I'm very proud of you, baby Rio: Daddy 😖 Rio: you're making me squirmy Buster: No, keep still Rio: I'm trying so hard Rio: but every time I think of you kissing me all over Buster: You're gonna need to try harder until I can actually be there to keep you still myself Buster: Do it for me now and no matter what, I won't stop kissing you when we're back together Rio: I'll do it Rio: not do it, actually Rio: hands to myself, I promise Buster: You know I trust you Rio: I wanna cover your whole face in kisses Buster: I love kissing you Rio: we can do it all day, can't we Buster: Yeah Rio: I'll never get tired of your face Rio: you're so pretty Buster: It's been so hard not to look at you Rio: you're going to struggle even more now you've seen everything Buster: I know Rio: I can send you pictures of how I'm really looking underneath Rio: make it even harder 😋 Buster: Can you? Rio: Right now? Buster: Right now Rio: [the sneakiest of partial nudes you can manage rn] Buster: Jesus Rio: if Edie was 💤 I could do better but Buster: It's even hotter that you did that even though she's not Rio: You told me to Rio: I'll do anything for you Buster: How early can you meet me? Rio: Depends what we're doing Rio: separately or otherwise, 'cos that changes the answer Buster: My mum and dad won't be keeping tabs on where I'm going or who with Rio: Mine either Rio: but I don't usually go out with my friends at the crack of dawn, sadly Buster: Haven't you ever accompanied him on his paper round? Rio: No, I'm not losing beauty-sleep for that Rio: but I will pretend to, that's a good idea Buster: You should get some actual sleep then Rio: no Buster: Behave, by the time you get home it'll almost be time to leave again Rio: but if I'm bad, you'll have to come get me sooner, right? Buster: Keep doing what you're told, you know that's what'll get you what you want the soonest Rio: Alright, I'll try Rio: even though I feel drunker than I am 'cos of all this Rio: high, like Buster: Me too Buster: The way I feel now, I reckon I could stay awake the full week I'm here and not have any regrets about it Rio: like I literally wanna be with you all the time Rio: I missed so much time with you already Buster: Fuck it, we'll stay up Buster: You're better than a load of lines, I won't even need 'em Rio: we can get 'em, if you want Buster: Do you want to? Rio: I'm not just saying no, like Rio: might need 'em, could be fun Buster: Okay Rio: Ryan'll get it, give him a shout when we wanna Buster: 'Course he will Rio: ? Buster: The cunt thinks he's in love with you, you do know that, yeah? Rio: he's just full-on Rio: probably all the coke Buster: No, he's full on and in love with you Rio: he can't be, we've barely had a 1x1 chat in our lives Buster: Like I said, he thinks he is Buster: He don't have to know you well for that Rio: well anyway, he gets decent gear, that's all that matters, yeah Buster: So I won't beat the shit out of him until after he's handed it over, fine Rio: your schedule is too full to be beating up anyone, 'scuse you Buster: It'll barely take a second Rio: second too long, sorry Rio: I'm that needy Buster: Is Edie asleep yet? Rio: Lemme see Rio: you know when you 👀 someone too hard and it's like they feel it then they're 👀 right back Rio: she always does that, so gotta be sneaky about it Buster: I always thought Nance or Junior were doing that but every time they were actually just sleeping Rio: Seriously Rio: slightly worrying how much they could sleep through Rio: but also good to know 😏 Buster: It only seems like they slept shit loads 'cause we never did Buster: I was fighting it until the last second so I could spend more of them with you Rio: Me too Rio: I don't even feel like that kid anymore, most of the time, thinking about what you said Rio: maybe it doesn't mater but I know I miss it, shit was simpler, if not perfect Buster: It's alright, I remember her, in spite of what I said, and I know she's not gone Rio: Maybe Rio: I think Eds is asleep Buster: Definitely, when you smile at me it's the same one Rio: You'll make me emotional Buster: I don't mean to Rio: I know Rio: just not used to this Buster: What? Rio: It just isn't like this, wasn't Rio: it's just been different, with any boyfriend I've had Buster: Different how? Rio: It's hard to explain Rio: like, they're nice but it's like, shallow, surface level Buster: You don't have to explain, I know what lads are like Rio: more than that though Rio: like it just didn't mean very much to me Buster: You wanted to hear it from me Buster: I'm sorry that I made you wait until tonight Rio: It was worth the wait Buster: You are Rio: You're special Buster: You'll make me emotional Rio: It's okay, baby Buster: I'm not used to feeling any of this Rio: me either Rio: we can slow down if we need Buster: No, I'm not gonna fuck this up Rio: You won't Buster: I can't Rio: No, you can't Buster: I won't lose you again Buster: I wouldn't be able to handle it Rio: Buster, it won't happen, I can promise that Rio: that is the last thing I want, I couldn't want anything less Buster: I'll make sure you don't ever want that to happen Rio: likewise Rio: you won't need anyone else for anything Buster: Unless I wanna have a fight, like Rio: you don't think I can hold my own? how rude Buster: I taught you everything you know, 'course you could Rio: maybe I learnt some new moves since Rio: try me 👊💋 Buster: Well there's no danger of you throwing a newspaper at me, you already told me you haven't been out delivering Rio: Oh my God, it's not MY paper round, let me live 🙄😂 Buster: Get a better boyfriend and I will Rio: I've told you I'm dumping him Buster: Yeah Rio: You really want me to get another one, yeah? Buster: Don't Rio: I don't want another boyfriend, you know that Buster: Nobody but me Rio: No one else, ever Buster: I've deleted them all Buster: Every girl I was talking to before Rio: I love you Buster: I need you Buster: It has to be you Rio: It's me Rio: I'm for you and that won't change Rio: 'cos I always have been Buster: It's not just that I've not felt like this before, it's that I know I won't ever again Buster: For anyone but you Rio: That's how I feel too Buster: If I have to lie every weekend to come back and make this work, I will Rio: There must be a decent excuse Rio: some school-related bullshit that they'll approve of Rio: I'll put my less sleepy more sober brain to it Buster: Me too Rio: what are you doing, are you in bed? Buster: [a bed selfie that he doesn't mean to look adorable in but does cos snuggly] Rio: oh Rio: why are you so sweet Buster: Am I? Rio: 👼 Rio: that's what you look like rn Buster: Well then, I could say I'm going to your nan's church every Sunday Rio: 😂 it's well believable you've found God Rio: if you were actually a good boy she'd probably 💀💀 so double win Buster: Yeah cheers, I've had a religious experience Buster: Now I know what heaven feels like and how hot angels are, I'm converted Rio: Shut up 😏 Rio: God really does do it for 'em, though Rio: they all compete over who can make the best cakes for pastor Rio: dread to think how many of 'em he's having affairs with Buster: Or seeing someone who is everything they'd disapprove of, that's what I'd do if I was him Rio: I don't think you should change your career plans, babe Buster: Religion is less of a career, more of a hobby Rio: is if you're faking it Rio: wonder if they'd go in for that on your uni apps though Buster: Definitely would Rio: you're welcome Rio: +points for multiculturalism if you go to my nan's church Buster: I'll see you there Rio: what's in it for me? Buster: Getting to share a hymn book with me Rio: 🤔 Rio: tempting, I'll definitely think about it Buster: Tempting is me in my church clothes, obviously Rio: Okay, I can't deny that Rio: you looked so good today Buster: You look so fucking good every time I see you Buster: But you should post more, it's really frustrating when you don't Rio: Yeah? Rio: How frustrating? Buster: As frustrating as when you walked away from me earlier and I wasn't allowed to stop you Rio: That bad Rio: that was like Rio: painful how much I didn't want to Buster: Almost as bad as dancing Buster: It's painful any time I can't look at you or touch you Rio: I just wanted to dance with you like anyone else could dance with their partner Rio: but more, obviously Buster: We'll go out before I leave Buster: Do it properly Rio: then we can dance EXACTLY how I wanna Rio: which will be way more frustrating but then we can find some dark corner and you can do something about it Buster: Like I said, I'm having a religious experience Buster: 'Cause that sounds like heaven to me Rio: I can be your angel Rio: if you keep blessing me Buster: You are Rio: You're fucking godlike, baby Buster: If I had the power, you'd be here with me right now Rio: I can be Rio: I can't speak to you Rio: still in the car Rio: but you can give me your sermon, like Buster: Everyone's definitely asleep, yeah? Rio: except the driver Buster: Well yeah, but if his eyes ain't on the road, you're at risk of more than getting caught Rio: He's not looking at me Buster: Good Rio: Please, daddy Rio: let me hear your voice Buster: [we calling and we all know what's up and that it'll be fire so that driver better be chill] Rio: [Ali will be keeping a motherly snoozy eye really she's not that shwasted and irresponsible] Buster: [we love you gal] Rio: [no shame from you two though, from the off] Buster: [literally start as you mean to go on, running so JJ can walk tbh] Rio: [tbh x2] Buster: [you've felt bad about it for long enough lads, I don't blame you for having no shame now] Rio: [you can feel bad when everyone finds out, for now the secret is yours lads] Buster: [they gotta eventually fall asleep together on this phone because literally their thing, we'll wake you when you get home gal] Rio: [absolutely Buster: [do we wanna do our skip in this convo or a new one?] Rio: [hmm, let's do it in this one] Buster: [how are we even gonna lol] Rio: [maybe she hangs up when she gets home 'cos he's snoozing and she doesn't wanna wake him but that wakes him up?] Buster: [good idea] Buster: You're home Rio: Yes Rio: you're meant to be sleeping Buster: No, I'm meant to be staying awake with you Rio: it is unacceptable how perfect you look when you're asleep Rio: how dare you Buster: You look perfect whatever you're doing Buster: I'm not mad Rio: Good Rio: because I'd just hate to have to make it up to you 😋 Buster: I'm spoiling you, remember Buster: Not the other way round Rio: How could I forget when you're so good at it Buster: I won't let you Rio: how did you get me to sleep so fast Buster: Just that good, babe Buster: Like you said Rio: too good for anyone else Buster: Yeah Buster: They don't deserve me Rio: I'll do everything to keep being deserving Buster: You don't have to do anything Buster: You're just that good too Rio: 🥰 Buster: I'm so glad that I'm gonna be able to get to know you again Buster: Properly, like before Rio: It'll be good Rio: to have someone to really talk to and trust Buster: You don't feel like you have that? Rio: it's different Rio: like I have my friends and we can go out and have fun and talk about the day to day Rio: and I've got Mum and June and the girls Rio: but I look after them, I'm not bringing my shit to them, you know Buster: Yeah, I know what you mean Rio: just being the oldest, isn't it Rio: and moving somewhere late, when everyone's been friends for years, it's just not going to be that deep Buster: Exactly Rio: You get it Rio: you're the only childhood friend I have, really Buster: You've got Nance too though Buster: She's not constantly with your brother, to her dismay, like Rio: Yeah, that's true Rio: you know you're different Rio: in lots of ways, not just the obvious Buster: She's probably not secretly in love with you as well, granted Rio: 😂 Don't Rio: I know it doesn't make logical sense Rio: that it'd be the same Rio: but it wouldn't, it's weird to even think that about her Buster: It wouldn't be the same, like you said, in so many ways it can't be Buster: I've always felt like this about you and it's always made sense to me Buster: Why wouldn't I? Rio: I don't see why it's so bad Rio: if someone gets with their childhood sweetheart, people don't say it's fucked up 'cos they 'grew up together' Rio: that's why it's so lovely, you know Rio: we weren't in the same house, we weren't literally raised together day to day in the same way by the same people Rio: maybe I've just talked myself into thinking it's okay because I want it to be but I don't care Rio: if no one knows, no one is getting hurt Buster: It is okay, it's not like you're my sister Buster: That'd be fucked Buster: I saw you less than most people see their childhood friends, which you're right, nobody would have a problem with Buster: If you got with that kid who dared us to kiss, for example, everyone would think it was well sweet and he was a little cunt so Rio: Little cunt is a bit harsh but I see your point 😏 Buster: We've established your memory is unreliable Rio: You wish Buster: He wishes 'cause then you could've ended up with him Rio: I'll have to hunt him down and break the bad news Rio: god knows where he is Buster: Don't Buster: You'll only refuse to let me beat him up either Rio: You can't beat up everyone who's ever known me, babe Rio: I'll never see you Buster: Just the ones that fancy you Rio: Past tense Rio: unless he's really kept it going all these years, which would be slightly worrying Rio: in that case, you might have to Buster: Unless he's had a serious brain injury or a gay awakening it'd be present tense again as soon as you tracked him down Rio: you make me feel so Rio: good Rio: in all the ways Buster: You're flawless, I keep telling you Buster: Fucking beautiful, smart, hilarious, really caring, even to me when I was being a bigger cunt than that kid Rio: that doesn't mean I can handle that without melting into a mess of Rio: I don't even know Buster: I can easily handle carrying you, we also established that, so don't worry Rio: I want it Rio: carry me to the bathroom and take off my makeup because I can't be bothered Buster: Leave it, I'll do it for you for real Rio: You don't care the state I'll be if we do that? Buster: No, 'cause you won't be in one Buster: Flawless is flawless Rio: well, don't say you weren't warned then Buster: I don't need to be warned that your skin isn't naturally shimmery, I'm not an idiot Rio: You're perfect, that's what you are Buster: You do remember where I live, right? You wear less makeup than any other girl I've ever met Rio: 😂 Rio: so many girls at school I wanna politely come at with a makeup wipe Rio: less is  more Buster: I've literally had to throw shirts out and all we did was dance Rio: Don't get me started on the shades of tan Rio: I don't know who they think they're fooling with that orange orange Buster: Ava's gonna start on all this shit soon Buster: Fucking hell Buster: I actually won't have time to beat up any lads for you, sorry Rio: I understand Rio: you have a few years though Rio: get some practice in Buster: It's Chelsea, I'm lucky she ain't already started Rio: it's depressing really Buster: She shouldn't be growing up here Rio: it's not consolation to say I think it's much of a muchness everywhere but Rio: you just worry about them, regardless Rio: Billie don't wear makeup ever but it's not like she don't give me grief still Rio: just different ways Buster: Yeah Rio: not lecturing you though Rio: you know Rio: didn't have to beat up boys for Nance and it's still stressful, yeah Buster: I still do, just for different reasons Rio: That hasn't got any better then? Buster: No Rio: I thought she seemed pretty off Rio: she's gonna have to do something about it, or your parents are for her, a big something Rio: current approach clearly isn't cutting it and you can't be expected to shoulder that Buster: She won't do fuck all about it Buster: That's what our fight was about Rio: Ahh Rio: it can't be easy, like it won't be, whatever she has to do Rio: but neither can her day to day, surely Buster: 'Course it is, stop rolling over and taking it, easy as that Rio: for you Rio: if she knew how to do that, wouldn't even be an issue, like Buster: I've told her what to do Buster: If she stands up to them instead of being such an easy target, it'll stop Rio: some people just ain't made like that Rio: if she fucked it up, it'd make it worse, right? Buster: She's a McKenna we're all made like that Rio: My brother ain't like that either Buster: It's different for him Buster: Only having sisters and no proper dad Buster: He still wouldn't let anyone say or do the shit Nance is letting them get away with without at least getting your mum involved Rio: He isn't how he is because of any of that Rio: that's just who he is Rio: and he just chooses to not fully be that with outsiders so they have nothing to say Buster: Alright, I'm not having a go at him Buster: I can't when I'm as bad Rio: I know Rio: and I get the frustration at her, I really do Rio: just don't reckon going on the offensive with her is gonna help at this point is all Buster: She ain't talking to me so there's fuck all I can do anyway Rio: She will Rio: give her some space whilst she's here, she should chill Rio: and we can too Buster: I wasn't gonna invite her along with us, like Rio: Would be a bit rude Rio: and counterproductive to all our plans but Buster: Where are we going? Rio: everywhere worth going, obviously Rio: but tomorrow specifically Rio: 🤔 Buster: Today specifically by now Rio: Oh yeah Rio: God, I'm gonna be knackered Buster: I'll take care of you Buster: Starting with taking your makeup off Rio: maybe we could just pay for a cheap room somewhere Rio: spend the whole day just taking care of each other Rio: can always go somewhere in the PM Buster: It's not gonna be cheap, who am I? Buster: Do you want a pool, babe? Rio: It can't be that expensive or they won't let me in 😂 Rio: but we could splash out on a pool for a day, like Rio: my funds stretch that far Buster: You don't need any funds Buster: And shut up, you've never looked any less than 5 star worthy Rio: you can't pay for everything Buster: Yeah I can Rio: You know what I mean, boy Buster: I know you can't stop me Rio: Buster 😒 Buster: Baby Buster: We're not fighting about it Rio: I'll get us food and 🍾🥂 Rio: then I'll say okay Buster: I love you Rio: I love you Buster: Do you wanna sleep? We can set the same alarm and then I'll come pick you up Rio: We should, that's a good idea Buster: Or I could just leave now Rio: I could sneak you in Rio: but could you sneak out Buster: Again, who am I? Buster: There's nothing I can't do Buster: Especially when it's that easy Rio: You'll have to prove that you can keep quiet again 'cos there's no way we're leaving until you've fucked me Buster: With that kind of incentive I really can do anything Rio: 🥰 Rio: I'll be waiting then Rio: everyone here is dead to the world, will be for hours Buster: Have a nap, I'll wake you when I'm almost there Buster: Put your phone under your pillow, like Rio: Okay Rio: I'll try Buster: Good girl Rio: that doesn't make me wanna leave you Buster: Shhh Buster: Close your eyes Rio: I mean, you can't make me Rio: 😋🤭 Buster: Not yet Buster: But if you know what will happen Rio: We are supposed to be quiet, you're right Rio: if you're not up to punishing me and keeping me quiet, then I'll just have to be good Buster: Don't underestimate me Rio: Never Rio: I'm just telling you what I want Buster: I ain't forgotten Rio: 😶 me Rio: I'll be good now Buster: Yeah? Buster: 'Cause if I have to call you right now and tell you to be, you're in actual trouble so Buster: Really think about that Rio: 😖 Rio: best behaviour Rio: gonna really think about what I've done Rio: how to make it up to you Buster: You've got loads of time Rio: tell me about it Buster: [does tell her about how she can make it up to him in glorious detail obviously] Rio: FUCK Rio: be here so I can be really, really nice to you Buster: On my way Rio: but Buster: I know, this is why you need to sleep, then it'll feel like I'm there sooner Rio: but won't you be lonely without me, daddy? Buster: Yeah but before tonight I always was Buster: I can handle it Rio: I hate that Buster: It's okay Rio: no Rio: but it will be, from tonight Buster: Rio, listen, you can't promise me that and you don't have to Buster: I can handle it, I don't want easy, remember, and neither do you Rio: Maybe I can't Rio: but you won't be lonely, I can promise that Buster: You can't stay up forever, you know Rio: neither can you Buster: I'll sleep when I'm back Rio: I can keep up with you Rio: you said as much Buster: Yeah, I did Rio: There we go then Rio: don't fight me, babe Buster: How else am I gonna see those new moves you mentioned? Rio: we can fight like that Rio: just don't be mean to me Buster: I'll be nice Buster: You'll see Rio: but me first Rio: you've earnt it Buster: So have you Buster: And I'm stronger than you Rio: 🤤 Rio: can't be mad about that Buster: You won't be Rio: you make me feel small Rio: in a good way Rio: safe Buster: Good Buster: 'Cause you are safe Rio: Of course Rio: no reason I wouldn't be Rio: but it's still a nice feeling Buster: Like how you make me feel less alone Buster: I wasn't technically Rio: Yeah Rio: it's just Rio: right Rio: I've had boyfriends, so I can say Rio: it doesn't feel like this, just because of that title, supposed closeness Buster: I don't need a girlfriend to know it's right Rio: I wouldn't like that Rio: if you did Buster: Me either Buster: But I know that's what some people would say, if they found out Rio: it's not like you haven't slept with other girls though Buster: That's different to giving a shit about other girls though Rio: I guess Rio: but how much did I, how much do most people our age Buster: You care about everyone Buster: It's not just part of your night same as having another drink or line Rio: but I care about you more than I have any of them, that's my point Buster: And mine is, from on outside perspective it looks like you've tried harder than me Rio: I get it Rio: you can try Rio: like that Rio: if you want Buster: No Rio: I'm just saying Rio: if you need to Buster: Don't say things like that Rio: I have to Rio: I'm not going to let you not be sure Buster: You think I'm not? Rio: No, I think you are Rio: but I need you to know you've got the opportunity to test it, if you do need it, at any point Buster: I need you, that's all Rio: Okay Buster: Yeah, it is Buster: I'm not gonna change my mind and nobody's gonna change it for me Rio: I won't either Rio: I love you Buster: Your name was there among the first load of words I ever learned, don't forget that Buster: I've loved you my whole life Rio: you'll make me cry Buster: Don't cry, I'll shut up Rio: Don't Rio: you say all the things I wanna hear Buster: I wanna make you happy Rio: you do Rio: this is Rio: beyond happy Buster: No crying then Rio: I can't help it, baby Buster: I know but I can't hold you yet Rio: I won't cry when I see you Buster: You're only allowed to do that kind of shit when you're walking down the aisle Rio: Understood Buster: If we can't get married, you can't cry when you see me Rio: unfair Rio: but not your fault Buster: Yeah it is, I really want all the presents Rio: 😂 Rio: Exactly Buster: Not to mention, if you look that fucking good as a guest Rio: That's just dangerous Rio: less trying not to cry, more dying to get back down the aisle as quick as humanly possible 😍 Buster: I'm fine with dangerous, you know that Rio: I will not be fine with keeping my hands off you Buster: So touch me Rio: in front of the lord and the pastor? Rio: not to mention the guests Buster: I don't care Buster: Do it Buster: Whatever you want Rio: oh Rio: that's fucking hot Buster: It feels like ages since we last touched each other, which is bullshit 'cause before tonight it'd been years, and every part of me knows that, but Buster: I hate that I'm not already there Rio: It's true, it's hard to stop once you start something Rio: especially when that something feels as perfect as this does Buster: I'm gonna have to just live here Rio: If only Buster: You'll hide me, yeah? Rio: of course Rio: you know Chelsea will miss you too hard Buster: Clear out under your bed, like Buster: 'Course, I'm all that place has going for it Buster: Other than the coke being decent and abundant, I'll give 'em that Rio: and your school Rio: even if our system is better Rio: does any school here have the same 'connections' 🤔 Buster: They can get a new Head Boy and I can succeed anywhere Buster: Even catholic Rio: 'course Rio: you're a very good boy, after all Buster: I look like one anyway Rio: 👼 Rio: Okay Rio: come live in my bed Rio: under it Buster: Okay Buster: Sneak me in Rio: You're here? Rio: 🤩🤩🤩 Buster: I mean, I could have the wrong farmhouse, it's been a while Rio: I know you wanna see Dan that bad but that's really mean, babe Buster: Fuck's sake, he's literally the boy next door Buster: Hilarious Rio: I'm so glad you think so Rio: dunno if it counts as the trope if there's a shit ton of farmland between Buster: You really did want that love story, yeah? Rio: Shh Rio: I want you Buster: Make me Buster: 'Cause I want you so bad right now Rio: [Let him in gal] Buster: [don't give them away 🐈s we sneaking] Rio: [at least like Crim, they probably shout all the time for no real reason lol] Buster: [yeah always playing and chasing each other and being cray] Rio: [live for that danger] Buster: [we all know it because there's no way he's not making out with her the second she appears like just wait boy] Rio: [at least your mother is drunk and your sibs will be asleep/could think it was her boyf like mind ya business for a sec everyone] Buster: [Ali is probably asleep too at this point like it's gotta be early AM af] Rio: [we ain't having y'all get caught this quick lol] Buster: [imagine lol #gameover] Rio: [by the grace of god, you're so extra always] Buster: [literally carrying her upstairs as we speak so we rest our case] Rio: [live your best life lads] Buster: [is gonna actually take her makeup off for her and it'll be such a MOMENT bye] Rio: [the intimacy, bye] Buster: [when you do still look beautiful af though he's not even just hyping you] Rio: [like you never wear foundation or any shenanigans 'cos don't need] Buster: [we all know that moment will turn into him kissing her everywhere ever which will turn into every Simon x Alisha gifset ever] Rio: [god bless, get you a man] Buster: [it makes me lol like I don't remember it being such a thing when I watched the show but he's just always doing it appaz] Rio: [when you about that life] Buster: [Buster is so thanks for that blessed content] Rio: [I want 'em to fall asleep for a hot sec for that risk of peeps waking up for the day, like they should be fine but just 'cos 1. it's cute 2. we playing with fire always] Buster: [1000% approve for all those reasons and also it's believable like they literally have not slept and are drunk so] Rio: [exactly] Buster: [we know y'all are exhausting yourself with your antics] Rio: [only so hard you can front] Buster: [The effort of trying to be quiet in itself would kill you both so] Rio: [chatty caths] Buster: [mhmm] Rio: [when you can feasibly make more noise than him 'cos it could be Daniel so you're shamelessly using that to your advantage like you know he ain't gonna get you back later] Buster: [the perils of that posh boy accent] Rio: [loling imagining one of 'em like ew but typical and then being like wait...is that] Buster: [you're not getting rumbled today boy shut your mouth] Rio: [you can and will go ham in the hotel] Buster: [and it'll be fancy and you'll live your best lives just try not to break the bed as you have a habit of doing] Rio: [start as you mean to go on I reckon] Buster: [what do you think should wake them up like a toilet flush or something so you think its later in the morning than it is?] Rio: [that sounds legit and the kinda thing that would make you panic] Buster: [I know it's a big secret and everything but fairplay for waking up cos I would not] Rio: [lol hard same] Buster: [at least they can look at their phones and realise it's not 10am or whatever time they think it is and calm down] Rio: [back to not giving a fuck real quick] Buster: [should we let them go back to sleep or make them leave?] Rio: [I vote it's late enough that you could go get coffee n breakfast somewhere before you can check in] Buster: [and it feels like a mood to be like let's leave rn if they were shooketh and don't wanna risk it happening again if they fall back asleep] Rio: [exactly, you may as well tbh] Buster: [have a sleepy snuggle whilst you're doing the longest car ride back to civilisation lol] Rio: [that'll be a nice moment] Buster: [all the softness forever thank you] Rio: [nice throwback to the very first time we did 'em and they had that soft af coffee morning] Buster: [yaaaas but you don't have to wear Nance's clothes this time babe, you're welcome] Rio: [would be a very weird flex] Buster: [Christ knows what Buster is wearing though cos he would've got changed after the wedding when he went home but I doubt it was into a lewk because you were meant to be sleeping and I doubt even more than you got changed again before you then left your gaff] Rio: [we keeping it casual today] Buster: [we know they both look great anyway] Rio: [when do they not] Buster: [it's rude] Rio: [no wonder you lowkey wanna repopulate the earth] Buster: [love it for you] Rio: [think they have the most kids now p sure] Buster: [they do though gutted its not the 11 you OG wanted lads but it is still more than Ali which was the goal so] Rio: [we not falling into that trap again lol] Buster: [unless a face is literally perfect we mustn't] Rio: [cheeky gal] Buster: [do we want anything to specifically happen that we need to write down or do you just wanna leave this here like] Rio: [we can probably skip I reckon]