#but lucy seeing the beauty in them even with their flaws is something so beautiful to me

[sukibenders]

Snow instantly not vibing with the mockjay birds is so funny to me, they were in his mind from the start and would continue to haunt him. Love them for that.

[andromerot]

my pedro almodóvar marathon. thoughts, feelings, tier list

or, i spent like 50 hours on this so i better get to post about it

well, i'd be lying if i said i set out to do this with any clear goals in mind. i sort of just wanted to watch movies. this year i set out to watch through a couple of directors entire works, but ran into complications or got bored. so anyway when i finished my term i decided id try a third time with my best friend pedro. i had watched five of his films already but was mostly unaware of other things he had made. on the 22nd of november i started with matador, then went on and in exactly a month i had watched all of his feature films yayyy

so this is how i ranked them on letterboxd and this is a tier list. this doesnt really sum up my thoughts though so im leaving a little review for each below the cut, in the order i watched them in this month hope someone cares :) thank you

matador (1986): ohhhhhh my god. absolutely unexpected how insane this movie made me. many people say its not very good, i dont think that's true. transgressive, erotic, camp, necrosexual, implicit faggot tension, beautiful costuming, insanely talented cast of so many characters sick in the head. watching this one first really hyped me up to keep at it and to close out the month i rewatched it the other day and though it was less surprising than the first time i watched it its maybe my favorite now :) it has structural flaws i suppose. but i love it

¿que he hecho yo para merecer esto? (1984): pretty funny! not bad at all, i remember enjoying it as i watched it, it just wasnt very memorable. i enjoy every performance by carmen maura, chus was stellar as always and forqué was really sweet in this one too, i liked it. i literally forgot half of the plot though. did anyone remember the telepathic child or the faked hitler diaries? i didnt until i looked it up.

la ley del deseo (1987) (rewatched): showed this one to my friend, god its iconic. some of my favorite chiques almodovar. so fun to watch and so silly even though its not quite a comedy. the fact that antonio is just called antonio in this one makes me unwarrantedly happy. MAURA THE WOMAN THAT YOU ARE!! very hot all around. i think i liked it better this time than the other two i had watched it.

pepi, luci, bom y otras chicas del montón (1980): everyone talks about how sexually transgressive 80s almodovar is and i was like yeah whatever until i watched this one. straight up trilogy of trash shit. so beautiful. i wish every movie was like this. no one likes it but i adored it. erecciones generales will stay in my mind forever and i loved the musical numbers. and the piss, of course.

entre tinieblas (1983): also somewhat forgettable, though i watched it while pretty worried about something else so maybe i didnt give it the attention it deserved. its not a bad time but i wouldn't rewatch it. based on the premise you think it'd be better.

la flor de mi secreto (1995) (rewatched): OH GOD. until last month my favorite almodóvar, its been outdone but it still destroys me. its terribly underrated. i dont even know what i can say about it... marisa paredes is stunning at doing desperation. the boots, the scene at the protest, the initial meeting with ángel, the poem in the car, that moment in the hall. it's beautiful and breathtaking. lesbian film history, i promise.

todo sobre mi madre (1999): like, its good, but i dont get what people see in it that makes it so acclaimed. again paredes is great in this, but penélope is somewhat tame compared to what she does later, and this is the point in the list where i have to admit cecilia roth is not very good to me and all my compatriots start throwing rocks at me. listen i just wish she'd stop doing that stupid accent its so fucking bad cecilia sincerate seguro sos de villa crespo. anyway its fine if a bit weird about trans women, but hes always a hit or miss w that

átame (1989): took a big break between the last one and this one for some reason. anyway, pretty funny, except it really drags in the middle. shouldnt have been that long, but victoria abril always slays and the last scene is wonderful.

tacones lejanos (1991): WOAHHHHH! really cool i liked it. i love a mother daughter thing especially this mother and this daughter. really fun doppelganger story and i love how it was told, i found it both melodramatic and subtle? miguel bosé makes a really pretty girl, this will inform my every subsequent rewatch of suspiria. big fan of his gender. dance number fucked obvs

kika (1993) (rewatch): ok, i know why people don't like this one, but its so silly... cmon. it sillay. once again incredible abril performance, the costuming my god.... her character makes the whole movie i wish i was her. lesbian rossy de palma was wonderful and every forqué performance is a delight. pedro getting hitchcockian with it to slightly trick the audience is a staple of his 90s filmography, fucks.

carne trémula (1997): the title made me think it would be better! there was barely any carne. i didn't really see the point of most of it tbh, though based on how the movie starts and ends there might be some spanish historical context that im missing that makes it more interesting. strangely reminiscing of the buenos aires affair to me, but puig is better. yeah it was just pretty boring.

laberinto de pasiones (1982): YAYYYYYY i had some trouble torrenting so i watched it really out of order this but its SO FUN. obviously in the same vein as pepi luci bom but i liked it slightly more just for how unnecessarily elaborate it was. the one major role i dont mind roth being in and im a big fan of antonios gay terrorist with an ultradeveloped sense of smell character and arias is really into his very silly character too – he works well in secreto as well, i wish hed been on more almodovares, i should finally watch camila. liné was hilarious too. the problematic incest storyline was really funny to me sorryyyyy and i got a lot of gender out of the musical performances. hey can you believe that beautiful fag covered in blood is a franquista now. i can

hable con ella (2002): ehhhhhhh. some people really hate this one for the couple scenes i found most interesting, others love it for reasons i cant parse. its got parts that caught my attention a lot, but mostly it was eerie in an unenjoyable and uninteresting way and the backstories dragged on too long, especially grandinetti's. like i just don't care sorry. THE scene is quite disturbing though. i appreciated he decided to show rape in a more subtle light for once, it made it a lot more cruel and a lot more interesting.

la mala educación (2004) (rewatch): sighhhh. i really wish i liked this one. its got so many elements i am into – the colours are obviously spectacular, the unreliable multiple narrations and the disassembled timelines are always enjoyable to me, the attempt at social commentary is appreciated, some scenes are stunning (fictional ignacios head split in half is unforgettable) but quite honestly the characterization is so bad it bores me. i liked it more the first time i watched it just because of how confused i was, once i wasnt it lost its magic. maybe the worst in what is considered the "somewhat autobiographical movies about directors" trilogy (i think there's four of them but we'll discuss that later) probably because the character of enrique is so bland. i know its more but it feels that you only spend like five minutes with him. ángel/juan's motivations for anything are so puzzling, ignacio is just a caricature at this point and probably the character with the most depth is berenguer, which is ironic, i guess

volver (2006): WAHHH. its hard to talk about it honestly. it was so unexpectedly beautiful. the acting is so on point – penélope cruz and that beautiful carmen maura comeback are self evident, but blanca portillo is also stellar. it was fascinating from minute one and i couldnt keep my eyes off it. its written with such care and love. i suppose the plot itself is nothing out of this world, but the way it is handled is explosive. i really adored it.

los abrazos rotos (2009): the fourth bastard on the self insert series! cmon, its way more about himself than la mala educación. anyway, its good at some points, not very in others. the strong point is obviously the relationship between mateo, judit and diego, their refusal to be tied as a family and their desire to be tied by love is reaaaally interesting. the scene at the sea... but penélope and her millionaire and her millionaires son do nothing interesting at any point, im afraid to say. sad! surprisingly not very memorable, even though i didnt dislike it as i watched it. like i remember i liked some things but if a couple weeks later i dont remember what they were its probably the movies fault

la piel que habito (2011): AUGHHH OK. fuck. THIS ONE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE GOOD. it wasnt it was really mid. when it started i was like oh is pedro trying out his hand at cronenberg and i was really excited because im SURE he can do cronenberg better than cronenberg but he didnt. it was worse. how are you giving your women less agency than that guy??? honestly probably the first ever film of his where this is a noticeable problem, though penélope in the last one should give us a hint. ughh it should have been good. im mad about that. no desire to question gender or power and the unchronological storytelling does nothing for me. BAD! if anything i recognized its sexual power for if banderas character was a woman i would be throwing up and convulsing on the floor. i hope vicente and his lesbian coworker had a beautiful romance i guess. i cant believe some people call this one one of the most controversial of his work....

los amantes pasajeros (2013): hm well everyone was like THIS is the bad one and i was like i bet you guys are just being mean but no yeah this is the bad one. its not funny and it drags on so long...i can usually defend the rape scenes in his movies, even in kika or hable con ella, but this one just sucks so bad. i was prepared to defend this movie but i cant. as soon as the movie started i was trying to guess where all the threads would connect, how all the characters would be linked and they mostly... weren't? also the reference to the gazpacho scene in mujeres made me groan out loud.

julieta (2016): well i dont really know what this was supposed to be....it feels on the surface it could have been really good but something about it felt so emotionless. it was an odd experience, watching it, because i expected to be moved by so many scenes and i never was. i dont know what the point of it was.

dolor y gloria (2019): ok yeah this one was sweet! didn't blow my mind or anything but it was very cleverly made...a really more beautiful way to do the childhood-as-movie thing than in mala educación, i really enjoyed it. nostalgia bores me sometimes but i feel hes not being annoying about it. long live old man yaoi (and finally an argentinian actor i DONT hate...) and that beautiful beautiful cave and that mind gripping apartment bringing in the characteristic insane set design but in a new way...i had a good time

madres paralelas (2021): oh this could have been so good! it wasnt but honestly i dont remember exactly why i disliked it. i suppose i didnt connect to the characters and that it is a story that requires that to engage you – their motivations were really out of place and unlike other movies that bothered me. really interesting premise, didnt work out. im sad about it. could have been cool.

yeah so that's it i only realized while writing this that i forgot to rewatch mujeres but obvs that ones very good, proper classic, quote it every time i eat gazpacho and such. also extraña forma de vida is a snore i refuse to watch it again. i hope this works as a rec list for someone. and i am ready to be stoned by my wrong opinions by the rest of you

[evita-shelby]

They didn't know we were seeds

Chapter 16

Cw: grief, mentions of rage, prostitution, pedophilia

Heaven belongs to @call-sign-shark

@justrainandcoffee @emotionalcadaver @peakyswritings

She cleans the wounds in his hands and holds him as he mourns his niece.

Drunk with whiskey and grief, he is only a shell of the man she loves. He is broken, in ways hardly a few mentors have been. Not many survive it either, suicides were high amongst the victors even the careers for a reason.

Jack sleeps with her in her floor until the games are officially over. His room was too wrecked, and neither she nor Lyme could trust that he wouldn’t hurt himself in his pain.

Heaven wins on the third evening, with a staggering number of kills that thrill the Capitol.

Eva’s heard the eldest of Shelby’s brothers will be rewarded for his loyalty the same way Luca was rewarded with her. She can’t help but sympathize for the girl knowing she’ll have no choice but to join the roster or risk seeing her family die because of her.

You never win these things, you’re just stuck in the arena for the rest of your life, Eva thinks to herself as she holds Jack after his nightmares like she’s done these past three nights.

The morning after the games end, the avox assigned to Eva comes with Jack’s clothes and a note.

President Snow summons her before lunch, and she’d be a fool to even wonder why.

Jack had told her about that last argument with Gina where he had admitted to what they knew not to confirm. Nothing incriminating had been said, she knows for a fact what he told her in the gym hasn’t been reported and this life has made her into a good liar.

Eva is taken to a greenhouse, a beautiful thing filled to the brim with roses. It is a wonderland of colors and forms only the Capitol can have.

There are simple white roses like the ones Tigris had her wear. They don’t stand out here beyond being the favorites of Snow.

“I see you recognize them from your own games. My cousin knew what they meant to me and sought to hurt me.” He speaks as if they were more than master and servant.

“I inferred that by the way you hid it when you saw it on Dustin’s lapel…and by giving Jack the chance he needed to kill me.” Eva doesn’t play dumb, it’s not her way of playing these things. “Mistakes of your youth coming back to bite you, I supposed.”

She is dying to say Lucy Gray Baird coming back to haunt you. But she isn’t here for that, to play her card right now wouldn’t gain anything.

The words have him change the topic and get to it.

“Your unorthodox relationship with Iacobus has raised many concerns. Mr. Shelby believes as long as the rest of the districts hate District 2 we are in no danger.” Snow doesn’t beat around the bush, something Eva is thankful for.

There is a straightforwardness he shares with Tigris, only where it is comforting with her former Stylist it is deadly with him.

“People find it, what is the word, unpalatable. I killed his brother to win and named our child after him. Too macabre to inspire anything but disgust.” Eva grows brave enough to touch the white rose sporting shades of pink thanks to the acidity of its soil.

An unwanted flaw in the sea of perfection. Snow’s likely to prune it to keep it from destroying the image he portrays.

He'd prune them from existence if he knew what they were truly up to.

“Is that why you try to foster friendships between the tributes by those last day of training parties?”

Ah so that was part of it too! He couldn’t have someone show that the districts can unite for one goal. Heavensbee had said Jack and Eva being together were a threat to Snow’s order but could never be the symbol of the rebellion. The rebellion needed someone cleaner, a newer victor who didn’t have the blood of her lover’s brother in her hands.

“Started out as way to get Finnick and Annie one last date, but the children forget this is a punishment for their forbearers’ sins for a moment and sends them a little more relaxed into the arena with a hope maybe they will be the ones to go home.” Eva answers honestly, doesn’t have much to hide. “As you know humanely treated livestock produces tastier meat than its opposite. tributes who have hope and time to form alliances and even romances with fellow tributes produce better games, as you’ve seen.”

It is a disgusting thing to say, but makes Snow remember how much the Capitol loved Eva and Laurie’s ill-fated romance. There was even fanfiction about it, weird tales about her and him in their last days. Too many people had wanted them to fuck when they broke away from the rest of the career pack apparently.

The drama of friends going from fighting for each other to fighting each other gives ratings, star-crossed lovers dying to save the other or killing the other as well.

Jack’s pain and anguish had the Capitol bet against Heaven in hopes Marius could avenge the little girl on whose corpse he spread breadcrumbs on as was tradition in their district. They had lost their money, wept when Marius lost to the girl, but gave Eva the thing she needed to convince the President what she was doing was only her patriotic duty.

She hates herself for it.

“Your idea has merit; these past games have had higher ratings than their predecessors. I may be inclined to keep the practice for a price, Miss Smith.” Snow delicately cuts the rose she had touched and offers it to her.

“Some clients do not like women who have given birth.” Eva knows exactly what he wants. She was in high demand still, she was enigmatic and sexy, fond of revealing outfits and very well trained in fucking.

“They won’t be able to tell once the surgeons are done with you, dear.” He gives a smile as dangerous as snake oil, the blood on his sore tinging it like the nature he hides.

Snow knows Jack hates it and seeks to drive a wedge between them.

Smart man. Too bad it won’t work.

It’s a shit deal.

He tells her so and yet she comes home without a single hint of ever having nurtured their baby inside her.

Jack hates it, more than he hates how they cover up her freckles with makeup and make him wax off his body hair to fit their idea of beauty. Hates how his room had not a single sign that he had demolished it with his own fists and the metal floor lamp.

Laurie was the physical manifestation of their rebellion against Snow and his freak show, Eva’s ticket off the auction block and his reason for rebelling. His reason to live now.

To let herself be put back in that place for the sake of a fucking party for kids is a bad fucking deal. What if its not enough? What if Snow begins to demand more? What if one of those fuckers decides they want more than just some nights with her?

“I don’t need him to suspect anything about all this, they took Gina and will stop at nothing to take Laurie if we don’t dance to his tune.” Eva reminds him. “He knows we’re a threat, but if we do as he says he will believe he has won and fuck off for a while.”

Snow had taken Gina from him and knew Jack wouldn’t be able to handle Eva being forced to submit to anyone else. Jack had endured his fair share of torments with the people who bought him, he hated to see and even witness how people treated his Eva, his wife, like a fucking toy.

He’d kill them all if he could.

Perhaps that is what Snow wants, for Jack to lose what little restraint he has left and give them a reason to put him out of his misery like Titus from the last games.

Which is why they must run to 13 before Plutarch Heavensbee kills them all waiting for his fucking symbol. On the next shipment, he has to go with them, perfect the passage and see how he can get his family out here before Snow stops trusting Shelby.

It’s the only way.

[viriborne]

Hey I saw you do a character ask thing, and I was wondering if you would do lucifer

I COMPLETELY FORGOT TO ANSWER THIS EVEN THO I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY!!!!!

Okay, just to start off with, quick warning to Lucifer fans...I am VERY UNFORGIVING when it comes to my opinion and interpretation of him. He's too real of a character to me for me to like him. I appreciate his complexity... but I hate him lol.

If you've ever been in a family with generational trauma, you likely know someone like Lucifer. Someone who, while recognizing the abuse they've endured, still perpetuates it over and over again. Someone who controls his brothers just like how his Father did. And this is why he's mom-codedBEFORE PEOPLE GET ON ME FOR THIS, just listen. While we can't determine what Father's motivation is for keeping angels on short leashes, I feel as if we can infer that it's meant to "keep them in line," by force, if needed. We can see this mirrored in Lucifer's treatment of his brothers. Yes, the brothers are Very unruly but, as we can see with Mc's influence, they react MUCH better to when treated with kindness than humiliation and corporal punishment, something that mirrors real life. While Lucifer isn't as Bad as Father is when doling out punishments, it still yields the same effects of the brothers being terrified of the one in charge, something they reiterate over and over again. And Lucifer acknowledges this! He KNOWS his brothers are terrified of him but feels that it's "for the greater good" as he's scared of being thrown out of their home once again.

Okay, now let's get into Lucifer's treatment of Mc (is about to be nailed to a cross by Luci fans)

Sorry, I gotta mention Lucifer beating Mc until they passed out as "punishment" during the early lessons for the heinous crime of...protecting Beel and Luke. Like uhh wtf was that lol?? How am I supposed to like him after this? Even Belphegor had a better motive literally Killing us than he did for beating Mc unconcious lol. Not to mention the god forsaken pact scene where, despite attempting to be forced into a pact by Solomon multiple times, forces Mc into a pact (and a fade-to-black sex scene) and undermines their consent. Yippee!!! Overall, he's really just written to be the stereotypical Christian Grey archetype when it comes to Mc. I'd say he's like Beast from Beauty and the Beast but at least the beast grew as a person instead of being a man baby who can't express his emotions for the rest of his life. Instead, I feel as if he's the husband from The Taming of the Shrew. Okay that might be a bit harsh, even for him, but it still feels like an accurate comparison in some aspects lol.

Onto fandom interpretations: I've already gone at length as to why "daddy dom" Lucifer is inaccurate and makes me wanna deglove my entire body so I won't go into it. There is an issue where I feel like he's reduced only to a sexual object by many fans and that's Weird and Not Good and often aids in how he's so bastardized in writing and interpretation of his actions. It really feels like his bad parts Really get glossed over or completely excused even by fans who Recognize his flaws and I really feel like that's a damn shame. He's a shitty bastard with tons of baggage and u gotta accept that or else you're liking a completely different character.

Anyways take this meme I quickly made while writing this.

[di-daynamic]

@fluffbruary Day 26

Edmund had always liked the night.

That had been the case even before Narnia, and its incredible night sky and stars.

Admittedly, England’s stars were a lot lackluster in comparison, but he didn’t mind it. Much. He sat in the courtyard, leaning back up against the wall. He and Lucy tended to the garden a lot now, much to the astonishment of their parents. Lu had been the first to look at the surroundings back in Cair Paravel, he reminisced. After they had truly begun to rule, after everyone had really begun to look at them as leaders.

As the youngest, and the one Pete and Su were most protective of, she’d had a lot of free time in the beginning, before she began taking the regional court and dealing with soft power and diplomacy. Edmund had been busier – as the ‘Just’ he’d been in charge of most of the criminal trials, with Peter overseeing – but he’d been feeling extremely apologetic to his siblings, especially Lucy, and he’d never denied a chance to learn something. When Lucy had in her excited way rambled about her efforts to garden during one of their ‘compulsory everyone has to sit down and eat together’ meals, he'd liked the prospect of spending time with her enough to start, and he’d never stopped.

Remembering Narnia tended to be difficult though. Here, people still looked to him as a sullen child, while there he’d been a respected king. He sometimes wondered if he missed Narnia for its own sake or because he longed for a place without the flaws of England, where he could be respected.

“Looks like the first snow is here,” came a soft voice from behind him, and he instantly recognized it as his older sister.

Edmund looked up and felt the usual uneasy jerk of his stomach at the sight of anything to do with the White Witch. “So it is,” he agreed. “Is that what brings you out here at this time, dear sister?”

Susan smiled, bumping his shoulder with hers. She had always been beautiful – the kind that made other parents sigh and tell theirs that they were lucky to have such a beautiful girl who would be married off very easily – but ever since Narnia she had attained a maturity and grace of someone years older. Princes and kings had vied for her hand there.

Edmund sighed, and looked up at the stars. As all roads led to Rome, every thought these days led, somehow, twistingly, achingly, to Narnia. And how much he wished they could do it all over again.

“I saw you slip out,” she replied.

“So I can expect the others here soon too?” He asked dryly, but Susan didn’t answer that, instead looking him in the eye in that deducing way of hers. He avoided her gaze.

“What is it that brings you out here, Ed?”

Melancholy and memory, Edmund could answer, but that would bring to the forefront so many of the things they had carefully not spoken of. “I wanted to see the stars,” he said instead.

Susan looked up too. “They are beautiful,” she agreed, but he could hear in her voice the wistfulness for Narnia’s night sky.

Between the two of them, they thought too much. Peter and Lucy balanced them out, gave them joy and hope and optimism, though Pete could be a downer too, High King and all. Lu had her work cut out for her more often than not.

“I say, the pond has nearly iced over!” Lucy’s excited voice came. “Do you remember skating across the frozen rivers?”

Case in point.

“Of course,” Edmund replied, smiling at the memory. “During the winter festival. Every year, without fail. Una and Panna would always drag the two of you out, and then Pete and I’d come out just to keep you out of trouble.”

“Rather hypocritical of you to call the two of us troublemakers,” Susan drawled, but she was smiling too.

“I don’t know,” Peter teased, walking up to join them. “As I recall, it was the two of you who somehow managed to get us to stumble upon the Marsh-Wiggle rebellion. And let’s not forget the time Lucy went off with the dryads and left us to start preparing a recuse mission for an assumed kidnapping.”

Lucy rolled her eyes, and crossed her arms, huffing in a way Edmund had not heard her do since she was seventeen – but wait. She was only nine now, again.

It was difficult to remember that. Lucy slipped between acting nine and twenty-something. Peter gave commands the others obeyed instinctively, even if they contradicted their father’s. Edmund sometimes thought it was convenient to have grown up before and know how it would happen, and prevent the ridiculous ‘growing pains’ they’d had as teenagers, but then sometimes he just got so sick of being back here, with hard air and no magic and no power. It was a beastly business, altogether.

“—can’t talk, Peter!” Lucy was saying, gesturing exuberantly as always. “You were the one who got kidnapped more than a hundred times!”

“Oh yes, I remember throwing the ball for his hundredth kidnapping,” Susan said.

“I still cannot believe that when Oreius was leading a daring rescue, the three of you were dancing around in the ballroom,” Peter complained for the thousandth time.

Lucy waved a dismissive hand. “It was the hundredth time, brother. And that one was fairly low risk. We knew perfectly well you were more valuable as a hostage rather than dead. And those were low-grade smugglers. They would have never dared kill a royal.”

“We must treasure the time you are not there to boss us around,” Edmund proclaimed solemnly.

“To be sure, it was a greater shame that you managed to be captured by such incompetents,” Susan agreed, ignoring Peter’s protests, “The ball really was beautiful, wasn’t it? Though the ice sculptures were—” She hesitated, and all three of them gave Edmund the side-eye, concerned about him. Edmund rolled his eyes, he loved his siblings, but they needn’t think him so delicate so as to still quake in terror at anything even tangentially related to the White Witch.

“Ed, you danced with the Lady Eluna, remember? From Galma?” Lucy changed the topic, easily, as she was wont to do. The charming smile on her face distracted from the abruptness of it. It was why they had always sent her on diplomatic missions – with Peter or Edmund for company, of course.

Which wasn’t to say she wasn’t a terror on the battlefield, but the other three had always done their utmost best to keep their little sister away from the horrors of war, as much as could have been done with her being queen.

Edmund made a face. “Don’t remind me. Pete forced me. Said it was for ‘international relations’.”

Lucy made a clicking sound with her tongue. “Don’t listen to him, he enjoyed it. I caught him and Eluna on the balcony a couple hours into the cleanup.”

“We were only talking!” Edmund protested defensively, feeling heat rise in his cheeks.

“Just talking,” Peter mocked. “And he derides his royal brother for foisting such a great pleasure onto him.”

“Weren’t we only just teasing Peter?” Edmund complained. “Why can we not continue with just that?”

“Family time includes humiliation for everyone,” Peter smirked.

“Except me,” Lucy said cheerfully.

“I’m certain we could find something if you wished it, Lu,” Susan replied amusedly.

“Perhaps the time we went to sort the centaurs-dwarfs fight out?” Peter suggested.

“Hardly,” Edmund scoffed. “Lucy was perfectly fine in that. You’re the one who was humiliated in that, my dear sister.” He grinned at Su.

“Oh, don’t leave yourselves out,” Susan responded coolly, tossing her hair. “I seem to recall the two of you losing to Windstorm several times, and Peter proceeding to fall in the mud, and Ed making the terrible decision of burning the building down with him still in it.”

“It was an impulsive decision,” Edmund grumbled defensively, as his siblings laughed. “And you can’t say it wasn’t a good one.”

Lucy stopped laughing first. “No, we can’t,” she agreed quietly, obviously remembering the worse parts of the episode.

Narnia hadn’t been all fun and games. Ruling had been tough, and involved a lot of ugly scenes and making hard decisions.

“No regrets, then?” Peter asked, eyes and face grave, his High King imperiousness at an all-time high, and they knew perfectly well he wasn’t just asking about that mission.

“Never,” Lucy stated firmly.

Susan and Edmund exchanged a glance. “Certainly not,” she agreed.

Edmund could never, ever regret Narnia and what it had taught him, taught all of them. How it had helped heal the relations among the siblings. How much ever hurt it gave him, gave all of them, he loved it beyond anything.

“Except that you somehow managed to become even bossier, High King,” Edmund said cheekily, and his brother mockingly swatted at him, and the two of them began to playfight with their Susan exasperatedly telling them to stop and Lucy cheering them on.

How on Earth or Narnia could he ever regret this?

[mysoftboybensolo]

My Completely Unasked but Needed Review of BBC's Dracula "The Dark Compass" Subplot

I had no real interest in watching the BBC's Dracula, especially since I heard not so good things from it, but after seeing the post by @luanna801 (x) I was compelled since Jack is one of my favorites from Dracula and I'm growing an interest in the actor Matthew Beard. So I figured I watch "The Dark Compass" with all the Jack/Lucy bits, and, well, there's a lot to discuss here. Warning, very long post, please bear with me, I have a point.

Storyline:

Now set in the modern day, we see Jack getting ready in his house, ignoring the Jonathan Harker foundation, but picks up when he sees Lucy is calling him. She says that he can bring someone with him to the club tonight, and we see that they are clearly not in a romantic relationship, despite Jack having her picture as his home screen. A shot to Lucy in her own room taking selfies, ignoring her mother who is calling for her.

Jack arrives at the club alone, and has hearteyes for Lucy, who is dancing. She then introduces her friends to Quincy Morris, an American from Texas, and he's rich. Jack and Quincy talk, where we find out Jack is a student and junior doctor, wanting to specialize in mental health. Quincy doesn't seem to really care much for Lucy, saying he probably wouldn't be interested in her if she was not pretty, the same why she probably wouldn't be interested in him if he was poor. Outside, Zev, a gay friend of Lucy, tells her that he thinks she's a bit mean to Jack, who is clearly is in love with her, and she responds coldly. He tries to make Jack feel better, but after seeing Quincy propose, Jack accepts the call from the Harker foundation.

He is a student of Zoe Van Helsing, who suggested to him being part of the program for easy money to help his schooling, and they are debriefed on Dracula's return. Dracula is released from their custody because of lawyer Renfield, and Dracula steals Jack's phone, starting a conversation with Lucy. Now on her bachelorette party, Lucy decides she'll met Dracula, disregarding the fact that she is getting married real soon. They have a discussion of death, and Lucy is so disinterested in death that Dracula is drawn to make her a bride.

Jack is called by Zev to check on Lucy as she refuses to see doctors, and he sees the bite marks, informing Zoe. Lucy dies, and is cremating, which is something Dracula warned her about. Zoe and Jack confront Dracula, and Lucy turns up, unaware that she is no longer the beautiful young woman she was, but a horribly burned shell of herself. Jack, who was at first shocked and frightened at an undead Lucy, offers to kiss Lucy, reminding her that he had loved her and would always love her. They kiss and she feels the wooden stake in his hands, but rather than being upset, she begs him to kill her, and does, ending her misery. Dracula is mildly annoyed at her death, calling her an experiment, but Jack tells him that Lucy was never Dracula's or even Jack's. Zoe then, realizing what Dracula's weakness is, tells Jack to go, and despite his initial refusal, he goes when he sees the sun rising, leaving the place, saying "It's going to be a beautiful day."

Questions/Comments:

Ok, so this was, not great. Jack, played by Matthew Beard, was great, and it is such a shame that a Jack this good is in a plot line that is so bad. And really, the biggest flaw is in Lucy's character. In the book, Lucy is a sweet, innocent, and loving individual who hates to make anyone unhappy, but here, she is the total opposite of that. Something I can give Coppola's version of Lucy is that, while she is a flirt/promiscuous, is that she is at least kind. She cares deeply for Mina, is kind to her two other suitors and doesn't make them feel bad for not choosing them, but BBC's Lucy is so mean for no reason. She treats Jack poorly which made me wonder why he is so in love with her, especially since she barely takes note of him through the episode unless it's to laugh at him. This is not the fault of the actress, I think the actors were good, it's just their characters were so poorly written.

I am not saying Lucy owes Jack anything, but she is so mean about his feelings that it really bordered on bullying. I also am confused by the nature of their relationships. They are friends, but they slept together, but they still are hanging out? Is this an allosexual thing that am not getting? I wished that there was some explanation of how they were friends and exactly why he continues to hang out with her, even if it was for a sad, pathetic reason.

I also hated what they did to Quincy, because in the book he was a good character and, like Jack, loves her but respects her choice to choose Arthur. Here, he's a jerk who only seems to care about Lucy because she's beautiful and leaves immediately after her funeral back to America. The only nice characters in this segment was Jack and Zev, and they really got the short end of the stick here.

The one thing I can say I liked was the switch in the end with the "Bloofer Lady". In the book, when Lucy comes back, the children she attacks refer to her as "Bloofer Lady" and subverted expectations here was nice, but the build up to it was not great, because they were expecting the audience to care about her.

Changes I'd Make:

Keeping the general plot line, here is what I would have done. Have Lucy call Jack and instead of saying he's stalking her because he's being sentimental (weird, but whatever) have her be nicer to him, maybe asking if he's tired and if work is draining him, he doesn't have to come, but he insists because she wants him there. Have her not be aware that he has romantic feelings for her until the end, and she just thinks he's just being a great friend. Then we can keep Lucy being an influencer, but is unhappy about how people around her only see her as a pretty face, and not seeing her as anything more. Taking a cue from @forthegothicheroine make Mrs. Westenra be a bit antagonistic by fueling Lucy's insecurity by saying how she doesn't have to go to school when she could just marry a rich man, an easy thing for her since she's so pretty.

When Jack does to the club, have Lucy be so happy he's there, and introduce Quincy to everyone. Have it be that she and Quincy have been talking and having a long distance relationship and they finally met in person. The talk between Jack and Quincy can reveal more of the relationships the men have with Lucy. Maybe Jack met Lucy in college where he was a tutor to her and they grew to be friends. Quincy and she met on a dating app and although it's been three months, Quincy is nuts about her. Imagine their relationship being similar to the typical high school quarterback with the head cheerleader, but while they look like a good couple, one of them is not really happy because they want more. This would make Quincy a lot nicer, where he is misguided in what he believes Lucy is and loves her for that.

Zev sees that Jack is in love with Lucy, and tries to comfort him, even suggesting that he say something, considering that Lucy and Quincy have only dated for a short time, can't be serious. But then Quincy proposes, and Jack, disheartened, goes to the Harker foundation. Dracula still steals his phone, but instead of Lucy talking to him as a flirt, she has a one conversation with him, and intrigued, Dracula stalks her through her social media and sees she is out with her friends for her bachelorette party and goes to find her.

Lucy, having a moment of panic, realizing she really does not love Quincy and is only marrying him because everyone is expecting it of her and he is a good man, but he really doesn't know her, goes outside for fresh air. She meets Dracula, and feeling like she wants to escape, maybe wants to die, Dracula offers her the way out. Zev finds her, and asks Jack to check in on her. Let there be a nice moment between them, where Lucy is appreciative and sorry to drag him into this, but he dismisses her worries and checks on her. Seeing the marks he calls Zoe and Lucy dies.

After the funeral, Jack checks in on a distraught Quincy, who is devastated by her death, can't bear to stay in England so decides to return home, but says that if Jack's ever in America to look him up (which would be a nice reference to the friendship in the book). Keep Lucy being burned and meeting with Dracula, but have her interactions with Jack and Zoe a lot nicer. She'd say how happy she was to see Jack and be introduced to Zoe, who she knows because Jack talks about her.

Lucy would say to Jack how she could only imagine how happy her mother will be now, now that her little girl will always be beautiful, and people will always love her. She'll find out she's burned because Zoe suggests she take a picture to send to her mom, and she'll see that she is no longer beautiful. Have Dracula backhandedly comfort her but Jack to step in and say he'll kiss her, which leads to him admitting his feelings, making Lucy realize not only that Jack has been in love with her for the longest time, but also that despite how she looks, he still loves her for her. This would make her story more bittersweet, as she would have at last known that someone loved her for her, but to die when she did get that love.

I think this direction would have made it much better and less insulting to the original characters than the BBC did to them.

Tagging those who I think might be interested: @forthegothicheroine @luanna801 @spider-xan @the-timelord-a-tardis-stole @angelsbesides @spookbot

[secretsofthewilde]

One of the things I love about Wentworth is the underlying theme throughout the show about the found family that we make for ourselves even in trying circumstances. Even though if they werent incarcirated most of the inmates wouldn't even think to approach one another, let alone become friends, through the circumstances of being forced to live with one another they can't help but build their own families inside.

And we not only see that within the relationships between the characters themselves, but this tends to cross over with our relationship to them as an audience. Through the course of the show we see every character make a variety of choices that can be categorised as good or bad, and we know that everyone has done at least something "wrong" that has likely harmed someone. Yet despite seeing these women make bad choices, which in another show might immediately make us write them off as now being a bad guy/evil, we still know that they are more than these choices. The characters can be violent or say harmful things to each other, but then through the time we spend with them we also see them showing genuine care and vulnerability to one another. No one is without sin, regardless if you are in the teals or watching them, but likewise no one is without love in this show.

I just think it's really beautiful how they wrote a show that captured the complicated nature of people so well. Even characters like Lucy (who we are constantly reminded is not only extremely crass but is also a sexually violent person) aren't a one-dimensional background villain. She has her own family unit who we can see care for one another which remimds us that she must have some likeable traits, and we also see her have two moments of vulnerability with Vera which signal to us that she has a history of being looked down upon and treated poorly for it. And that's without going into the violent retribution she receives from Joan, leaving her permanently disabled (as satisfying as the "licked your last pussy" scene is to watch it was still an awful thing to have happen to someone).

I can't remember the last time I watched something where I felt such strong anger towards a character upon their introduction, but through time I grew to love them to the point that I was distraught upon their death - more than once - just due to how well the writing handles letting us see their flaws but also their humanity.

[savingthrcw]

For a moment she wondered if something was wrong, if seeing her had made him more nervous, but then he explained himself and Lucy let out a pleased "Oh?" and looked down at her dress, which probably had some merits. He was a smooth-talker, her future husband. Maybe she'd get him to talk to the kids, she knew the other married couples helped each other in their jobs. "I have flaws too, if it helps. There is a reason if I was going straight to the spinsterhood road," she joked, but it wasn't too far removed from the truth. Either her suitors were cousins or unbearable, or the men were quick to find less direct, less talkative, women. Women who knew how to be mysterious and seductive, who would be a little less loud, a little less... too much. But Lucy couldn't help herself, there was so much to do, to see, to try. "Sometimes," she started her confession with an awkward smile, wrinkling her nose, "I accidentally say exactly what I think. Well... more than sometimes."

The cornfield was, of course, beautiful, the happiest place where to celebrate their wedding, and Lucy was excited. Even Norm smiled at her after sitting down, and she thought later she'd have to take a moment to introduce them.

This was a chance to get to know at least a little bit about this girl he's supposed to marry. What he came to find, at least, was that she seemed to be awfully cheery for someone who's whole life had been dictated by someone else. "Well, it'd be awfully awkward if you didn't approve at least some." He grinned again, leaning in just a little closer so she could hear. "I'll be honest, sweetheart, I got a little more nervous seein' you. You're," younger? "prettier than I was expectin'."

"Then I guess we'll have to figure out which ones are the good ones." He looked out as they came to the cornfield, and fuck, it looked so... artificial. Made him miss his own boyhood farm more than he was expecting. Would any of it still be standing?

He still remembered his last wedding vividly; the way that Barb looked as she walked down the aisle, how relieved his mother was that he was finally settling down. And the tabloid photos... at least he'd get to miss that this time around. Lucy, at least, seemed so far removed from his ex wife... so much different.

[obeymeoasis]

Demon Bros React: MC Is Insecure

Warnings: mentions of insecurity surrounding body image, physical appearance, self-worth.

Lucifer

It was the day after a party Diavolo had thrown at his castle. You had had fun for the most part, dancing with the brothers and eating delicious foods prepared by Barbatos. 

But you also remembered how it had felt to look around the room and realize you were surrounded by gorgeous demons, not a single flaw on anyone’s face. Doubt and insecurity had begun to creep into your mind, and that feeling had carried over into the next day.

You had only talked briefly with Lucifer at the party because he was too busy interacting with Diavolo’s guests. Every time you tried to catch his eye, you noticed how beautiful whoever he was talking to was and found yourself swallowing down your greeting.

Currently Lucifer was at his desk like always, scribbling down notes and shuffling through papers. You brought him afternoon tea and sat reading in one of his armchairs to keep him company.

You had been telling yourself that you were going to ask him the question that was burning in your mind, but an hour had already passed since you first came in. You tried to distract yourself with your book but the words were fuzzy on the page. Finally, you spoke. “Luci?”

He didn’t look up from his desk when he answered, “Yes, love?”

“Do you... do you ever wish I was more beautiful?”

The scratching of his pen stopped immediately and Lucifer lowered the papers he was holding to show his face, a carefully blank expression revealing nothing. “What exactly do you mean by that question?”

“I mean exactly what I asked. Do you ever wish I was more beautiful? More attractive? As the Avatar of Pride have you ever been... embarrassed to be seen with me?”

At this Lucifer’s expression grew cold and furious. “Has someone... made you feel this way? Has someone made you feel as if you are inadequate?” You shook your head sadly and whispered, “No, just my own brain.”

“Ah, I see. Well pet, I don’t ever wish you were more beautiful because you are the most beautiful being I’ve ever seen. So it would be physically impossible for you to be more beautiful than you are now.”

You snorted. “Luci, that was so cheesy. Your brothers would throw up if they heard what you just said.” Lucifer’s lips quirked up in amusement. “Well, I’m glad I was able to make you laugh. And I do mean what I said. I’ve never once felt embarrassed to be with you; you are my pride, the source of my happiness. If anyone were to suggest otherwise, I would gladly kill them.”

“Luci, we’ve been over this. You can’t just kill everyone who is mildly rude to me.”

Lucifer went back to working on his papers but there was a gentle smile on his face. “Darling, you’ll find that I definitely can. I have a permit.”

Mammon

You were regretting tagging along to one of Mammon’s photo shoots. At first, it seemed like a fun idea getting to look at all the clothes, makeup, and jewelry. Plus, you really wanted to see what Mammon was like when he was working professionally. 

It was fun at first, you cooing over how handsome Mammon looked in his outfit and watching him get all flustered and blushy. But then the actual photoshoot started and you watched as Mammon posed with a stunning model.

You tried to not let your insecurities get the best of you. You were here to support Mammon! But as the shoot progressed you couldn’t help but start to compare yourself, keeping track of how they were more beautiful and you more flawed. 

The photographer stopped to take a break and Mammon immediately bounced over to you. “MC, did you see me? How does it feel to watch the Great Mammon in his natural element? I look good, don’t I?”

You caressed Mammon’s cheek and feigned a bright smile. “You were amazing Mammon! You look so handsome. And this is such a cool outfit!” But Mammon was somehow always able to tell when you were faking a good mood and he frowned. “MC, is something wrong? You look sad. Did something happen?”

You opened your mouth, an excuse ready on your lips, but found you couldn’t lie right to Mammon’s face. You gestured toward the model who was talking to their manager in the corner. “Do you ever wish I looked like that?”

Mammon cocked his head, confused. “Do I ever wish you had blue hair? Not particularly? Although now that I think about it, blue hair would look cool on you too.”

You sighed. “No, I mean do you ever wish I looked like a model? Sexier? Or prettier?” Mammon thought for a moment, processing your question, and then frowned. “Oh no no no. Treasure, what’s this all about? What happened?”

“Sorry Mams, I didn’t want to distract you while you’re working. I just got really low and insecure all of a sudden. Started thinking about how you should be with someone really beautiful, you know? And sometimes I feel like that’s not me.”

Clearly upset, Mammon rushed to give you a crushing hug, tucking your head underneath his chin. “MC I- I wish I could beam my thoughts into your head. That way you’d really believe me when I say that you’re so precious to me. Every day I wake up and think about how lucky I am to be with you.”

You chuckled a little. “I do put up a lot with you, don’t I.” Mammon gently smacked you on your back. “Hey! I’ve been good lately! But seriously MC, you are stunning. You are gorgeous. And it’s okay if you don’t believe me right now because- because I’ll tell you as many times as you need me to! I’ll tell you a thousand times a day! A million times!”

You tried to blink away the tears in your eyes and held onto Mammon even tighter. “Thanks Mams, I love you so much.”

“Love you too treasure. Your first man’s gonna take care of you, don’t you worry about a thing.”

Leviathan

Usually you liked watching anime with Levi; it was one of your favorite things to do together. Levi was always more happy and lively when watching with you because he was able to express his opinions freely without judgment. And you thought it was adorable how excited Levi got over his favorite characters and storylines.

Today, you were snuggled together on some cushions re-watching an episode of “The Magical Ruri Hanai: Demon Girl”. At first you were enjoying the episode, laughing as Ruri got used to the oddities of the human world. But Levi’s repeated comments about how cute Ruri-chan was, which you usually never minded, started to bother you a bit.

You took a quick glance around the room, noting Levi’s enormous collection of Ruri-chan posters, figurines, and other merch. Levi tapped you on the knee, interrupting your thoughts. “MC, you’re missing the best part! What are you looking at?”

You sighed a little, struggling to act nonchalant. “Sorry Levi, it’s nothing. I’m still watching.” Frowning, Levi paused the episode and turned to look at you. “Hey, what’s up?”

Taking a deep breath, you said “Levi, I’m not Ruri-chan.” He narrowed his eyes in confusion. “Yes... I know?”

You continued, “I don’t look like Ruri-chan. Does that bother you?”

“Does it bother me... that you don’t look like an anime character?” He repeated the question slowly, as if you had asked him the strangest question in the world.

Frustrated, you blurted out “I don’t look like Ruri-chan! I’m never going to be as cute as her!”

Levi looked completely bewildered, his eyes wide and staring at you in confusion. “B-But you are cute! MC, w-what are you even talking about?” 

Embarrassed at your outburst you looked down at the floor silently. Levi scooted over toward you so that your knees were touching and he waited until you broke the silence. “Sometimes I wonder if I’m good enough. I think maybe you’d like it if I looked cuter or acted cuter, like the characters in anime.”

Levi hesitated for a moment before quickly grabbing onto your hand, blushing furiously as he did so. "MC, I-I already think you're c-cute. Really really cute. So don't say things like that. And also, I like you because you're you! Not because you're like someone else."

"And you make me really happy. I'm just a gross otaku. I never thought I'd be able to... to find someone like you. Someone who accepts me."

He tried to lock eyes with you but blushed even harder and stared at your joined hands. "Plus, I couldn't to-touch an anime character. But I can touch you. I can hold your hand or give you hugs whenever you need it, o-okay?"

You leaned your head onto Levi's shoulder and closed your eyes, letting the peaceful silence wash over you.

Satan

You were accompanying Satan on a trip to one of his favorite stores: an antique shop that sold all manner of rare books and artifacts. The owner, Ms. Sparrow, was a friend of Satan’s and she welcomed the two of you wholeheartedly.

Today, she looked as gorgeous as she always did. Her chic pearl dress and matching silk gloves shone against her dark skin. Not a curl in her hair was out of place and even the click-clack of her heels on the floor seemed melodious somehow.

You left Satan to look at the books and went wandering off into the various aisles of the store, marveling at all the bits and bobs. In one of the over-stuffed corners you happened to find a glittering silver key on a red velvet ribbon. Taking it in your hand, you went back through to show it off to Satan, wanting to ask him what he thought it opened.

But Satan was busy chatting and laughing with Ms. Sparrow. You watched the two of them for a moment and noticed how well they complimented each other. Both had a certain poise, a kind of confidence and certainty in their movements.

On your walk back to the dorms, you were unusually quiet and Satan noticed. “Pet, is something the matter?”

You hesitated, wondering if Satan was going to find your insecurity childish. “Satan, I’m not very....elegant.”

“Yes, I know. You choked on a piece of bread yesterday. The day before that you tripped over absolutely nothing and fell down.” He smiled, expecting for you to get riled up, but it fell when he saw that you looked dejected. “Love, what is the matter? Have I upset you?”

You avoided his gaze. “Sometimes... sometimes I wonder if I bring you down by being with you. I feel like you deserve someone elegant and sophisticated. Someone who matches you. But I’m not. I’m clumsy and messy and not perfect, like Ms. Sparrow.”

Satan’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Ms. Sparrow? What does she have anything to with this?” He turned you around so that you were facing him. “Pet, please look at me. I love you. And I’m not with you in spite of you being clumsy or messy. I love you because you’re clumsy and messy, because those are parts of you and I love all of you.”

He leaned down to press his forehead against yours. “And why would I need someone perfect? Am I perfect? Yesterday you saw me screaming at my cup because I accidentally spilled some tea and burned my finger.”

You shrugged while giggling, “I thought it was a perfectly reasonable response.” You wrapped your arms around his and buried your face into his shoulder. “Thanks, Satan. You always know how to make me feel better.”

He reached down to give you a gentle kiss. “Anytime, love. I’m always here for you.”

Asmodeus

Asmo has a lot of fans across all his social media accounts. That was made perfectly clear the first time you went on a date with him outside. Sitting in the trendy coffeeshop, several people had come up to ask him for a picture or an autograph. He was never shy about you and always introduced you as his sweetheart, cooing about how beautiful you were. 

Some days it was okay. You loved seeing the bubbly social-butterfly side of Asmo. He was always so sweet to everyone who came up to him and genuinely enjoyed meeting new people. But other days, your insecurity rose up like a huge wave and dampened everything.

This particular day you were shopping with Asmo in a new boutique that had opened up. You were aimlessly flicking through the racks of clothes when you heard a large squealing.

Two demons ran up to Asmo, talking and gesturing excitedly. You could make out that they followed him on Devilgram and were asking if he was willing to take a picture with them. These demons were some of the most attractive beings you had ever seen. Their clothes were incredibly stylish and their hair and makeup were done flawlessly.

Looking around the shop, in all of the full length mirrors you could see the reflection of Asmo and his beautiful fans. And you looked out of place, like a puzzle piece that didn’t fit in at all. 

Tearing up, you grabbed a random pair of jeans off the rack and ran into a changing room. You turned away from the mirror, not wanting to look at yourself, and took deep breaths to try and keep from bursting into sobs. After a few moments Asmo began looking for you, having finished taking pictures. “Sweetheart, are you changing? Let me see what you’re wearing when you’re done!”

At the sound of his voice you burst into tears and your attempts to muffle the noise were futile. Outside the door, Asmo’s voice sounded panicked. “Darling, are you okay? What’s the matter? Please come outside, whatever it is please let me help you!” You hesitated, not wanting to face him, but this made him even more frantic. He started jiggling the doorknob and knocking on the door.

You opened it, afraid that he would accidentally break the doorknob leaving you trapped inside. As soon as he saw you he gathered you in his arms and began making shushing noises while smoothing your hair. “Sweetheart, why are you crying? Please talk to me, please tell me what’s wrong.”

You tried to get the words out in between sobs and hiccups. “A-Asmo, don’t you want someone m-more beautiful? Someone who-who looks g-good with you?” Asmo paused for a moment, processing your words, and then his eyes burned with anger. “Sweetheart, did one of my fans say something mean to you? Did someone make you feel like this?”

You shook your head vigorously. “No, just me.” Asmo breathed a sigh of relief at hearing no one had harrassed you and resumed smoothing your hair. “Oh, darling. You ARE beautiful. You’re stunning, sweetheart. I wish you could see the way I saw you, how adorable and gorgeous you are. And I understand that there are going to be days when you don’t believe me, when you feel like you’re not. But at least don’t go through those days alone, okay?”

You nodded, not trusting yourself to speak without tearing up again.

"Now, let's go get some ice cream. We can eat it while taking a bubble bath."

Beelzebub

You weren’t really sure why Beel liked you coming with him to the gym all the time, even if you didn’t exercise. He said your presence was calming and that it made him focus better, which was odd because a lot of the time you just sat on an unoccupied machine and scrolled through your D.D.D.

Today was much the same, with Beel running on the treadmill and you watching some videos. The gym was pretty empty, just a few students exercising here and there.

Your eyes drifted to Beel who was running without even breaking a sweat. His body was all solid muscle: his arms, legs, and abs looked perfectly chiseled and toned. Last week you accidentally ran into Beel in the hallway and it felt like you had smashed into a brick wall. Beel, on the other hand, was completely fine.

You began to wonder what Beel thought about your body. He could be pretty handsy at times and he wasn’t shy in his affections. But what if there was something he didn’t like? Something that he thought needed changing?

He’s never mentioned anything about exercising to you before. But you thought back to the students you had seen in this gym: all of them were extremely fit with incredible bodies. You couldn’t help but start to compare yourself to them and think that maybe you were lacking.

Just then, Beel finished his run and walked over to you. You weren’t sure what kind of facial expression you were making but it seemed enough to concern him because he asked, “MC, is everything okay?”

“Hey Beel... do you ever wish I had a nicer body?”

He squinted in confusion. “What do you mean by ‘a nicer body’?”

“I don’t know... just better. Whatever nicer looks like for you.”

Beel was quiet for a moment, thinking. “No, I've never wished for that before. I still don't know what you mean by 'nicer'. I love you. And I love your body because its yours. The only thing that matters to me is whether you’re happy. And as long as I'm still allowed to touch you, then I'm happy.”

He looked at you nervously then, biting his lip. "Am I... still allowed to touch you?"

You laughed and reached to give him a hug, loving how safe it felt in his arms. "Of course, big guy. Thanks for making me feel better. You always know what to say."

Beel flushed with pride and closed his eyes in happiness, leaning into your hand as you patted him on the head.

Belphegor

You knew you were dreaming because you were sitting in a R.A.D classroom surrounded by fellow students, but you couldn’t focus on any of their faces. They were blurry, as if someone had smudged them like an artist had smudged some charcoal.

You were at your desk, looking around the classroom, when as if on cue all of the students began to slowly gather around you. They stood there silently for a moment, unmoving, and you felt a shiver go up your spine. 

And then one by one the students began to hurl insults at you.

“You’re not good enough. Not good enough for Belphegor.” “You’re ugly, you’re hideous. “You’re unwanted, go back to where you came from.” “You don’t deserve what you have, don’t deserve good.” “You’re weak.” “You ruin others, you ruin everything.”

As they insulted you the students began to draw themselves closer, pushing and shoving to reach you. They almost made a cover over your desk as if to block out all the light. You hunched over your desk, shaking and panicking, trying to curl up to protect yourself.

One of the demons began shaking your shoulder roughly, you yelping in pain. He began yelling in your ear, “Wake up! Wake up!”

“MC! Wake up!”

You startled awake and looked around the room in fear. You were in Belphie’s bed, your pajamas sticking to you with sweat. Belphie was looking at you with concern, one hand still on your shoulder.

“MC, you’re okay. It’s just me. It was just a nightmare.” You let out a sob and buried yourself in his arms while he patted you on the back until your breaths evened out.

“D-Did you see my dream?” you asked. You were nervous about showing Belphie that weak side of you, the insecurities that had been brewing since the two of you had begun a relationship. He looked apologetic. “I did. You were whimpering and shaking in your sleep. I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

He reached over, one hand smoothing your hair, the fingers of his other hand interlaced with yours. “None of what they said was true, you know.” You looked down, embarrassed. “I mean it, MC. You are good enough. You’re beautiful, you’re wanted, you deserve all the nice and beautiful things in the world, you’re strong. And most importantly, you lift others up. You lift me up everyday.”

He lifted up your hand and pressed a kiss against it. “You lifted me out of darkness. I love you so much. And I’ll gladly stay by your side, for as long as you’ll have me.”

You grabbed the front of his sweater to draw him into a rough kiss, lips bruising. “Forever, Belphie. Forever.” 

[thealexchen]

Highlights of the Katy and Erika Q&A

Link to the Q&A! https://www.twitch.tv/videos/1161022793 

- Erika’s first audition with a scene partner was with Han Soto (Gabe)! Neither of them had gotten their parts yet, but Han still called “I’ll see you on set!” over his shoulder as he was leaving. Erika also said that he was a wonderful mentor figure and also someone who gave her a lot of shit, like an older brother would.

- THEY ANSWERED MY QUESTION!!! 😭 I had asked, "Since you were working on this game for several years, how do you think your performance or skills as an actor changed over time as you got to know your character better?"

Erika explained that in an early callback, she had to act out Gabe’s death scene and got into the moment by imagining that her little brother Evan had died. Later on she realized that it wasn’t healthy or sustainable to go to such dark places mentally over and over: “It's great to bring your lived experience in but not at the at the level of sacrificing your own health.” She later referred to the Lucid Body Technique invented by a dancer named Fay Simpson that she learned while on an acting retreat in Creed, CO (”Fun fact, Creed is actually a small mining town that was saved by theater!”). Instead of calling up traumatic memories, Erika focused on where that emotion “lives” in her body, accessed them safely, and was able to bring herself back to the present moment. Katy also mentioned she studied the technique in college. All super interesting stuff!

- Han pulled so many pranks on set that Webb (performance director) and Corwin (mocap producer) forced him to limit it to “one prank per day... on Erika.” He managed to jumpscare her every time and when she tried to get him back, “He didn’t even blink. I was like ‘What the fuck is going on?”

- Alex evolved a lot over the course of writing the game. Apparently the first iteration of Alex was a lot more like Chloe-- very bitter, brittle and with a lot of repressed anger-- but that got softened as they developed Alex’s power and as Erika brought more of herself to the performance.

- Apparently Gabe’s death scene was fun to film because when Gabe got knocked off the cliff, Erika got pulled in a sled to simulate Alex being pulled toward the edge while tied to Gabe. So they did a million takes of that and Erika just got to sit in a sled. Meanwhile Katy was at a butterfly garden down the street.

- Another fun scene (apparently) was when Alex fell down the mineshaft at the end of chapter 4 and the beginning of chapter 5, as Erika describes: “They basically rigged me up to a swing, like a sex swing-- not a sex swing. I mean, I walked in and I think that was my first question. I was like ‘Is that a sex swing? What are we filming today? I didn’t get these scripts.’” Cue the chat going insane.

What actually happened was she hung onto a board and two pulleys dropped on either side of her so she fell onto a crash pad. Apparently Webb practiced before and “really bruised the shit out of his ribs.”

- The “The crowd is really picking up on my energy. Haaaaa we love you Alex! Haaaaa Steph sucks!” line during the foosball game was entirely improvised by Erika, just having fun on set. Erika also admits she’s very chatty and just enjoyed getting to know her castmates so that they were already all friends when they acted together.

- Webb sent Han and Erika on a day trip to Idaho Springs early in production to bond and of course Han suggested they go gambling (Erika added, “Which of course is something that Gabe would do! Like ‘Let’s go do something sinful.”) They also played with Han’s drone. Katy went to see one of Erika’s plays in Colorado!

- When asked about what Erika would do if she had Alex’s powers: “I think it would be a cool power too because there’s so much covering that happens with all of us in social settings and professional settings. And being able to have insight into what’s really going on would probably create the need to be a much a kinder, generous, forgiving person, which are things that I’m always working on. I don’t think you could not become that.”

- Erika on Asian representation in True Colors: "[Alex is] not the best friend, she's not the tiger mom, she's her own fully realized, three dimensional person with flaws and goals and dreams and things she wished she could do over again. And I think that, for me, as somebody who grew up not seeing people who looked like me in movies-- and that's why Lucy Liu was such a fucking huge deal-- but the fact that D9 didn't do it in a tropey way was incredible. I know how important that Alex is a woman of color. She doesn't fit the mold of typical video game female bodies either, which I think is amazing."

- Erika lowkey hated the mocap suits. She couldn’t understand why Katy didn’t mind them and said “Katy. Katy. Katy.” “No it was so comfy it was like I was in my jammies!” “I remember you said that and I was like ‘What the fuck is wrong with you?! This is not comfortable!’”

- Erika’s advice to aspiring creatives: “Don’t let the fear of being bad at something stop you.”

- E: “I feel like I've been talking a lot" K: “This is your interview!" E: “Yeah I know but your voice is better.” K: “What?! MA’AM. MA’AM??”

- When Erika and Katy talk about teleportation as a superpower: “Or like when you wake up in the middle of the night and you have to pee, like ‘Should I just pee my pants? Or should I walk to the-- it’s just so far.”

- When Erika mentioned she grew up with a Golden Retriever the chat went “RYAN THE GOLDEN RETRIEVER”

- Erika’s closing remarks: I cannot wait for y’all to play the DLC because Wavelengths is gonna be the shit. And I’m gonna tell you why! Because it’s all about Steph! Which means it’s all about Katy! It’s gonna be so fucking good you guys. It’s gonna be beautiful. It’s gonna be funny. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll want to live in Haven Springs even more. You’ll want to marry Katy Bentz. What more could you ask for?? K: Could you be my hype woman forever please?

[cjsinkythoughts]

Ocean Eyes, Cherry Lips, Ivory Keys

Pairing: 40s!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 2747

Warnings: Cursing, mentions of alcohol, I think that’s all

A/N: This is a headcanon I’ve had for a while that I’ve been wanting to write about 40s!Bucky, pre-War. I kinda want to write a series about it, so that might happen. For now, enjoy this little tidbit I’ve written, with the prompt of Occasion for HBC’s Lucky in Love Day 18! (This isn’t beta’d so please excuse mistakes.)

He’s something of a celebrity. A living legend. A God amongst humans. Starting as a kid in Brooklyn, his fanbase rapidly grew, expanding to Queens, Manhattan, even parts of New Jersey, just in the past few years.

You don’t get it. So what if he’s got cool blue eyes, soft chocolate hair, and a charming smile? Who cares if he’s got smooth moves and even smoother words? He’s just a man - a human being - with flaws just like everyone else. A talented and gorgeous man, who has all of New York wanting to fall to her knees to please him, but still just a man.

James Buchanan Barnes.

Most everyone knew his name, but there was a lot of mystery surrounding the actual character. 

You just don’t see what all the fuss is about. You’ve never personally met him, or even seen him, but you know people who have. Your friend’s cousin even claims to have danced with him once. Not that that would be hard. You hear he’s never danced with the same bird twice, and, considering most start dancing in their teenage years, that’s a lot of dames.

It’s not that you’re not curious about him - if he’s actually as dashing as they say - but you’re not about to stop your life for him like some of your friends. They’re obsessed with getting his attention. With seeing if they’d be the one. The one to finally chain him down and tame him. The one he’d go steady with.

It feels like that’s all you ever talk about anymore. It was amusing at first, but now it’s just getting annoying. It’s been three years since that day in March of 1938, when your roommate ran into your room, plopping down onto your bed, before ranting and raving about the new ocean eyed piano player at her favorite bar. And since then, he’s been in your life without actually being in your life.

Speaking of, here you are. Listening to Lucy, MaryAnne, and Jean gushing over the man, trying to enjoy your milkshake.

“I heard from Sally that Thomas said that he knew the brother of one of his friend’s in high school!”

“That can’t be true! I heard from Billy, who heard from Martha, who was told by Ben, that he only had, like, one friend in high school.”

“You’re kidding, right? There’s no way a man like that had only one friend.”

“I hear he does boxing and that’s why he’s got a body sculpted like a Greek God.”

“Oh my God! MaryAnne!”

You rub your temples, resisting the urge to roll your eyes as the three burst into fits of giggles. If you have to hear one more word about-

“I heard he’s going to be playing at Georgie’s on Friday!”

Gasps echoed around the table. “No way! Georgie’s?”

You raise an eyebrow, this actually intriguing you. Georgie’s is a popular little hole in the wall, on the edge of being a speakeasy, which doubles as a pub and a dance hall in Brooklyn. It’s one of the best hang outs for kids like you and your girls, but it isn’t very high class. Maybe that’s why it’s one of the best. “Isn’t Georgie’s a little…cheap for him? He’s been playing at the best bars and restaurants for a while now.”

“It’s a classic in Brooklyn. Near his home, probably.”

“Do you think he lives near there?!”

“Ooo! Maybe we could find out!’

You scoff. “That,” gesturing to Lucy with your glass, you take a sip of your milkshake. “Is called stalking, my friend.”

Jean waves towards you dismissively. “I think he lives near Tin Pan Alley. That’s where he plays the most, after all. Georgie’s was probably just an old hang out for him and his pals.”

“Wait, wait,” you shake your head, a thought popping into your head. You turn to Lucy, confused. “How’d you find out he’s playing at Georgie’s anyways? Isn’t part of his whole act not telling anyone where he’s playing?”

Giving you a smirk and a wink, Lucy shrugs. “I’ve got my connections.”

You roll your eyes again, turning your attention back to your milkshake. “So?!” MaryAnne squealed. “We’re going on Friday, right?”

“Hell yes!”

“Absolutely!”

“Not.” You mumble, causing the other three to stare at you incredulously.

“Not?!”

“I’m not wasting my Friday night going to see some fella you all have a crush on. Especially when he might not even be there.”

Your friends groan, exchanging glances. “And what’re you gonna do?” Jean crossed her arms with a pointed look on her face. “Sit down and read a book like you always do?”

You huff. “I like reading, sue me. I don’t get a lot of time to myself. You know that new girl’s been gumming up the works and I’ve had to stay late to fix her mistakes all week.”

“This is exactly what you need, then! Come out, have a drink, jive a little-”

You look up at that, an amused kind of smirk on your lips. “Jive? Me and my clumsy ass?”

You all laugh. “Okay, so maybe not dance, but c’mon! It’ll be snazzy, you’ll see!”

“Fine, fine.” Standing up with a sigh, you collect your things, smoothing down your dress with your hands. “I’ve gotta scram.”

“We’ll see you on Friday, right?”

You give a small smile, shooting them a wink. “I guess I can make it.”

***************

Friday comes a lot faster than you anticipate. You dress up; a navy blue dress going to your knees with white, heart shaped buttons and a bow around the waist. The shoes you’re wearing are your nice black and white Mary Janes. Lips painted deep red, and hair pinned back in loose curls, you glance over yourself in a mirror. You’ll admit; you look damn good. You don’t wanna go, but you might as well try to have some fun since you are.

It’s a cool evening, early May meaning the summer humidity hasn’t hit just yet. You didn’t even think about bringing a coat, but you start to regret the decision as you start walking. MaryAnne, who you actually room with, already left, being way too excited to stay put.

It doesn’t take you long - you live on the border of Queens and Brooklyn - but your feet are more sore than you’d like when you arrive.

“I knew you’d come!” Lucy grins, coming up besides you and linking her arm in yours. MaryAnne comes up on your other side and does the same to your free arm.

“Where’s Jean?”

“Where do you think? She already found a Joe to swing with.”

You laugh. “Of course she has! So is your dreamboat here?”

The grins that are immediately on their faces answer your question and they quickly drag you inside.

It’s hot and crowded and dim. Skirts with their beaus, guys with their broads, swinging and dancing to the lively music of the band on stage. Smoke from cigarettes, pipes, and cigars is evident in the air as they neared the bar portion of the building, mixing with the boisterous sound of laughter and chatter.

“Everyone’s talking about it! He’s here, but he hasn’t played yet. We’ve been trying to catch a glimpse of him, but we think he’s in a back room.” The dramatic sigh MaryAnne gives makes you laugh a little.

“Okay, khaki whackies. Let’s get a drink.”

You, just as you thought would happen tonight, are left alone at the bar by your friends who quickly found partners to dance with. A few men asked you, but you have never been a good dancer.

You’re lost in thought, running a finger gently around the rim of your cup, when a voice sounded besides you, pulling you out of your thoughts, a slight rasp to the otherwise mellifluous voice.

“You gonna drink that, doll, or just stare at it all night?”

You raise an eyebrow at the jest, turning your head, only to have your breath hitch. What a specimen. Ocean blue eyes, fluffy brown curls, cherry pink lips. A white dress shirt is pulled over his broad chest, gray dress pants hugging thick thighs, matching suit jacket across wide shoulders. He has a blue, black, and white plaid tie around his neck and you can see the edges of his blue suspenders under his blazer. He’s put together, but it’s nothing special, a normal Sunday best suit, that much you can tell.

“Uh, not all night.” You look back to the drink, before looking at the clock with a hum, tilting your head playfully. “Maybe another hour.”

He chuckles, gesturing for the bartender. “Tell me this, sweetheart. What is a beautiful dame like yourself doin’ drinking alone?”

“I’m not very good on my feet, I’m afraid.” You laugh nervously, taking a sip of your drink.

“Don’t come here often, then?”

“Only for special occasions.”

“What’s the special occasion this evenin’, sugar?”

You shrug. “My friends dragged me here. They’re practically in love with this guy who’s supposedly playing the piano tonight. James Barnes. Have you ever heard of him?”

He chuckles, a grin pulling his lips upwards. “Yeah. Yeah I’ve heard of ‘im. Not a big fan yourself?”

“I’m sure he’s fine. I just don’t understand the fascination with him. Let the man be.”

“I agree.” He hums with a nod, grabbing the glass of whiskey the bartender set in front of him. “I actually know him.”

“Really?” You look at him in interest.

He tilts his head with a smile towards you that makes you melt. “Yeah. He feels the same. He just likes playin’. That’s all. He didn’t want all the attention. He gets enough without that.”

You raise an eyebrow, finishing off your drink. “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. I’m Bucky by the way.”

You eye his hand, grabbing it after a second, letting him bring your knuckles to his lips. “Y/N.”

“It’s very nice to meet you, mama.” He shifts his body more towards you, running a hand through his hair. “You said you ain’t fond of dancin’?”

Shaking your head, you quickly defend yourself, “no, no. I like dancing. I’m just not very good. Got two left feet.”

He smirks, tongue poking out to run over those plump lips of his. “Well, with the right partner, it doesn’t really matter.”

“Are you asking me to dance, Bucky?”

“Not if you’re gonna say no.” He responds with a toothy grin, leaning his elbows on his knees.

You sigh and shake your head. “I’m afraid tonight’s not your night, pal. I just can’t seem to get myself in the mood.”

He hums, leaning back. “Is it the music? Too fast for you?”

“I wouldn’t mind if they slowed it down some, I suppose.”

He smiles cheekily. “I can help with that. Hold on.”

You grin at him, nodding. “I’ll be here.”

Watching him stand and make his way over to the stage, you quirk an eyebrow. He seems to know the band well, if the handshakes and the claps on the back have anything to say about it. He says something to the lead, who nods with a grin, shooting him a wink. Bucky laughs, but you can see a tint of pink dusting his cheeks, making you wonder what they were saying.

He makes his way back over as the band shifts tones, the animated swing changing to a slow jazzy number. Bucky beams at you, holding out his hand as he approaches. “Care to dance?”

You purse your lips, narrowing your eyes, but taking his hand anyways. “How’d you do that? Do you work here?’

“Uh…somethin’ like that.” He states vaguely, leading you to the dance floor with the other swaying couples. Pulling you as close as appropriate, his hands resting politely on your waist, he starts moving you side to side. 

“That’s not ominous.” You place your hands on his shoulders, following his lead as you stare at your feet.

He chuckles, hooking a finger under your chin to lift your gaze. “I’ve gotcha, doll. I won’t let you fall.”

“I’m going to step on your feet.” You explain.

“Nah. You’re doin’ great. You just need to get outta your head. Relax a little. Tell me something about yourself.”

You hum. “Like what?”

“Anything.”

“Uh, okay…I have a roommate who is one of the girls who begged me to come, I’m a secretary - I know, boring - and…I dunno. I like reading.”

His eyes lighten at this. “Reading? Whaddya like to read?”

“Different things. Depends on my mood. I’m re-reading The Hobbit for, like, the twentieth time right now.”

“I love The Hobbit.” Bucky grins, making you smile back. “I read it almost as soon as it came out.”

“Me too! I was planning on reading it tonight but,” you gesture around. “Here I am.”

Bucky lips pull up softly, his hold on your waist tightening ever so slightly as he pulls you closer. “Well, as much as I love that book, I’m glad you came out tonight.”

Giving him a little tease, you tap your chin thoughtfully. “Eh…I think I’d rather be at home.”

He pinches your side gently, making you squeal and squirm. “That hurt, sugar. That physically hurt me. C’mon, mama, your gonna say you aren’t havin’ a good time?”

“I just met you ten minutes ago.”

“Well, sweetheart, if you think we’re movin’ too fast, I won’t introduce you to my folks just yet.”

You laugh, blinking up at him. “That’s very thoughtful of you, Buck.”

The two of you rock for a little while longer, before the band stops, announcing they’re taking a break and a special guest is going to play a little something.

“Maybe James Barnes is here.” You say, a bit of intrigue lacing your tone, trying to see through the crowds of people who started gathering around the stage to catch a glimpse of the charming pianist. “I see why he would be over the attention.”

“Yeah.” Bucky sighs, almost sadly, giving you an apologetic look. “Listen, I’ve gotta go work for a bit, but I’ll be right back.”

You smirk. “So you do work here?”

“Um…kinda. You’ll see.”

You raise an eyebrow at his words, but he’s kissing your knuckles and walking away. You frown, but can’t think more on it when three young women are on you, babbling about their dates.

“Who were you dancing with, Y/N? He was cute!”

You roll your eyes, feeling yourself heat up, and not because of the many bodies in the vicinity. “Just…some guy.”

“C’mon, c’mon! We’ve gotta get a good spot to actually see him!”

You huff, letting the drag you through the crowd, shoving their way towards the front just as a familiar deep voice spoke. 

“Thanks for comin’ out, everyone. I hope your havin’ a good night. Let’s get this hop started, yeah?”

Your eyes widen when you finally catch sight of the man sitting at the piano with a polite smile on his features. He catches your eye and shoots you a wink, before his fingers start flying over the keys. The beam that he gets while tickling the gleaming ivories, his azure eyes lighting up, and you can’t fight the smile you get. He looks so relaxed, so invigorated, that it makes you happy just watching him.

“Oh my God! Weren’t you dancing with him?!” Lucy shook your shoulder obnoxiously, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care, mesmerized with the way he played like it’s the only thing he wanted to do with his life. Which, as you remember his words, ‘he just likes playin’. That’s all.’ you figure it is the only thing he wanted to do with his life.

You just danced with James Barnes…and he’s just as perfect as everyone says.

You’re still trying to wrap your head around it, your friends jumping around you, trying to get every little detail of him from you, when your heart skips a beat and your brain malfunctions. Bucky had started up another song, slower and more intimate, and he’s looking right at you. 

You find yourself doing something you never thought you would; you’re swooning over James Barnes, smiling like an idiot, heat blooming up your neck and flaming your face. And yes, he’s just a man - a human being - with flaws just like everyone else. But he’s a talented and gorgeous man, who has all of New York wanting to fall to her knees to please him.

And now that includes you.

[chaggiehearts]

1. Exactly! I think that this specific plot point was actually great to characterize Charlie in a very satisfying manner and not just Vaggie. She was obviously upset about Vaggie hiding this part of herself and she felt conflicted between her goals of redemption and having to confront the idea that her girlfriend's hands were more stained with blood than probably anyone else's in the hotel (since the problem wasn't so much that Vaggie was an angel but instead that she was specifically an exorcist). She was angry both by having been lied to and by the moral conflict she was going through. I think that's great, because it's a challenge of her unwavering idealism and optimism that we see throughout the season and gives her more depth, makes her look more human. Even the most trusting and hopeful person would feel betrayed in this scenario. It felt messy and real and it made her resolution feel more authentic when even faced with this dilemma she chose to believe in redemption and second chances. However, it's also very understandable for Vaggie not to want to reveal the truth about who she is. We don't know much about their first meeting but, knowing that Vaggie sucks at lying, I mostly imagine Charlie rationally thinking that the woman she's found is a Sinner, Vaggie being scared of what might happen if she tells the truth to this powerful demon while being extremely weak herself, adjusting to life without one eye and her wings (just because she spared one demon it doesn't mean that all her prejudices will be gone in an instant and, although we all know Charlie is a sweetheart, Vaggie wouldn't know if Charlie would be understanding of her situation) so simply nodding and the lie getting bigger and bigger and now it's been three years and Charlie's her girlfriend and she loves her, she's making Charlie's dreams come true and knowing the truth might break her heart, it might make her stop loving her. She knows Charlie believes in others but Vaggie doesn't forgive herself for what she's done, which makes her doubt whether Charlie would if she knew. And she's afraid because, after all, Vaggie perceives her past as her biggest flaw and what happened the last time someone saw her "making a mistake"? That time she lost everything she had. Luckily, this whole experience made them both grow as individuals and as a couple and that's what's beautiful about it :)

2. Yes! It's something I've noticed in many fandoms and Hazbin is certainly not an exception. Another example I can't think of is Lucifer and Lilith, with Luci being a very beloved character and Lilith being painted as the worst person to ever exist for disappearing from her daughter's life, even before the reveal of her being in Heaven. We don't know much about Lilith but I truly don't think she just left Charlie to spend 7 years chilling at a beach in Heaven with no worries, the same way Lucifer didn't spend that time just consciously ignoring Charlie to make rubber ducks, he was depressed and that affected his actions. I think there's probably a point to be made here about the difference in how mothers and fathers are perceived in society too. Also yes about the Alastor thing, he's really interesting and entertaining as a character but he's not good, at least not at this point of the story. He might be developing some bond with the other characters but his shady motives are bigger than those bonds, given how he didn't offer Charlie the info on angels being able to be killed for free and instead used the fact that she was emotionally devastated and she didn't have Vaggie by her side to strike a deal with her. That's not a very genuine friend thing to do lol

so like what actually is the Hazbin Hotel fandom demographic that so many people don't think Vaggie should be easily forgiven for hiding the truest part of herself from the people she loves the most out of an irrational but deeply internalized fear that they would hate her. Vaggie was in the fucking closet, folks.

[sweetandsourstalker]

Decided to give Yen a voice! I've never done any VA-ing before outside of tabletop roleplay, but this was fun. The lines are all from various answers (transcript below) but maybe I'll do other stuff in the future...haven't decided yet.))

Enjoy!))

"Of course I do! I love my sweetheart more than anyone, but I have friends, too. TK is really nice, and they're very helpful and patient. I would've been fired a long time ago without their help...I owe them so many favors. Lucy and I get along really, really well! We used to hang out when we had the night off--get drinks, play games, talk astrology. When she lost her job, she closed off and started doing harder stuff than I was comfortable with. So...we stopped spending as much time together. But she's not a bad person...she's in a bad place." [sigh] "I miss her."

"Excessively angry? I don't tend to get angry when I'm upset, I tend to get sad more than anything. I can't think of many things that would make me that mad...but I can think of one."

[snickering] "Alright, alright, that one was funny, I'll give you that. And if this isn't a joke then...boy, you are one dense bastard."

"Well, until I think of something, 'Peter' isn't too bad, is it? It's...kind of cute."

"Ex-fucking-scuse me? String who along? I've never been reciprocal of any of TK's weak attempts to flirt with me! Never! It's not my responsibility to tell them that I--a person with a boyfriend already--am not into them like that! Fuck off!"

"THE ONLY THING HURT IS MY PRIDE...stop laughing...!"

[gibberish] "Wedding?! I haven't put any thought any thought into that yet--I mean, I don't--I'm not--I do--I mean--I don't know, something...pretty???"

"I love the idea of love. Being able to care for someone else in a way that's unique to the two of you is...beautiful...in concept. In practice it's terrifying. Nobody can really love anyone 'completely'. Everyone has flaws, and even the people you love the most will have at least one undesirable trait. I always thought that for anyone to love anybody, they'd have to fake who they were. Hide their flaws, ignore the ones they see in their partner. Or it all falls apart. Even while I'm falling in love with my sweetheart...I don't want him to see my flaws. I'm so happy to have found him. He makes me feel like...like I found something I'd been looking for, for so long. But...surely it would fall apart if he knew what I'm really like? I-I can't go back to missing that piece of me. I can't. So I'll just keep hiding. I'm...good at that."

[charliedawn]

Imagine being the only angel that likes Lucifer and is still fighting for his redemption

" Chloe ! You have awful neighbors, did you know that..?!"

" Lucifer !"

The devil doesn't have the time to make one more step inside the room that you are already jumping in his arms. He sighs as he recognizes you and awkwardly pats your back until you untangle yourself from him, a wide smile spread across your face.

" Y/N..What are you doing here ?"

He asks straight away, but you only shrug nonchalantly, as if your presence was of no importance.

" Just wanted to check on you ! Are you alright ? Father told me that you could use some company ! Plus, aren't I allowed to visit my favorite angel from time to time ?!"

He looks at Chloe that only shrugs at him, as clueless as he is. She had noticed you waiting near her house and had first suspected you to be a threat, but the way you had smiled at her had immediately made her trust you somehow.

" Chloe is a wonderful woman ! I understand why you like her so much. Thank you for the tea."

Lucifer looks at the empty cup and raises an eyebrow at the detective.

" Hey ! Why didn't you ever made me some tea ?"

Chloe scoffs at his poor attempt at jealousy before walking past him.

" Because A) She's better behaved and B) She isn't the Devil. Now, you two have a lot to catch up on I assume, so I'll be taking Trixie to the zoo while you two take care of whatever you're here for.."

She glances at you knowingly and you smile gratefully at her. She slams the door behind her and as soon as she is gone, Lucifer loses his playful smile and looks at you with a worried expression.

" Y/N..What are you really doing here ? You are one of his favorites. You have to return up there. It is not safe down here.."

You frown at his sudden seriousness and give a little pout before replying, your arms crossed.

" But it is for you ? You were one of us, Luci. The Greatest. It hurt me so much when I saw you fall and I am still fighting for your redemption ! You have changed. You have changed so much and I am not about to give up because you have !"

His eyes start watering despite himself and he asks you with a tremor in his voice.

" Why still believe in me ? There is nothing to save anymore..Why try so hard, Y/N ?"

You seem to think about it for a while before sighing and looking up at him with a hopeful smile.

" Because, I remember who you were..I remember who we were to each other and it was so beautiful, Luci. We were beautiful. When you fell, it took Michael, Azrael and Gabriel to keep me from jumping after you. I love you, Luci. We all did at some point but, even if the others chose to forget, I didn't..If only your pride hadn't taken control over you. You could have been magnificent, the angel of angels..This is also why I decided to take care of Hell while you're gone, covering your absence from Dad.."

He frowns in incomprehension before you smile and take his appearance in front of him.

" Neat trick, huh ? Nobody noticed the difference up there..Well, almost nobody. Gabriel did, but he promised not to tell anyone."

He had almost forgotten completely about Hell and takes your hands to kiss your knuckles in a simple act of humble tenderness, knowing what you were risking in helping him, knowing what HE would do if he knew.

" I'm sorry. I just wanted to feel loved..I just wanted HIM to be proud of me..I don't regret what I did that day, but if I regret anything..It's to have made you suffer, my little angel.."

You stroke his hair softly and smile compassionately at him.

" HE knows..HE is always watching you and know that you were doing what you thought was just..One day, you will come back home and that day, I'll be here, waiting for you.."

Luci looks up at you and gently runs his hand through your locks. He then kisses your forehead and you smile before slowly wrapping your arms around his neck to play with the hair at the back of his neck.

" No matter what happens, you'll always have me, Luci.."

You look up at him with all of the love you feel for this cursed angel and Lucifer tightens his grip on you, his eyes momentarily turning red with emotions.

" This is what scares me, Y/N..My poor angel, waiting for me will destroy you. I will never come back. Either Father will send me back to Hell or I'll stay here, among the humans."

You bite your lower lip before looking up at him and finally admit what you had agreed on with the great above.

" I know..This is why Gabriel has allowed me to rule Hell while you stay here, permanently, or at least until Dad finds out.."

His eyes widen at the news and he shakes his head negatively before cradling your face with his hands, almost crying at your act of kindness.

" Oh no, my darling..I..I'm sure he didn't say that, he couldn't have agreed to that. You must have misunderstood..You can't do that..Gabriel would never let you do that. And even if he did, I can't ask you to do that for me.."

You puff your cheeks, upset at his lack of faith.

" Why don't you believe me ?! Have you forgotten that the code forbids me to lie ?! Or do you have such little faith on my abilities ?!"

He laughs at your grumpy expression and shakes his head, making you understand that that wasn't what he meant, before putting his forehead against yours.

" Oh no, angel..It's not about not believing that you are good enough, I know that you are. It's about you not being here, right now, with me..Not being blamed for something that should be my responsibility.."

You try to make sense of his words until you seem to understand and burst out laughing to his astonishment.

" I see what's happening here ! You're afraid I'll put myself between you and the lovely policewoman ! But, don't worry, I'll be as discreet as a mouse as long as I'll stay here..I'm just here for a month and then, I'll be gone. I even got a job as a teacher at the school of Trixie, so you won't have to worry about me asking for money ! Lovely kid by the way !"

If Lucifer didn't have a headache before, he certainly did now..He is overwhelmed by the amount of information you've just given him and falls on the sofa. You follow him and sit next to him with your eternal sweet smile on your face and he runs his hand over his face, worry and tiredness written all over his features. You put your hands on his shoulders and your chin upon one of your hands, trying to soothe him by stroking his shoulders with your thumbs reassuringly.

" Let me take care of you..You've suffered enough, my wonderful little snake.."

Lucifer smiles at the familiar nickname before laying his hand over your back and looking down at you with teary eyes.

" Even after all this time, you still accept me ? You still find the strength in yourself to love me ?"

You answer him with a wide grin.

" Always. I'll always love you, Luci..They can tell me whatever they want, I know you and who you really are. I've seen every single part of you and I will always love all of them. Your flaws and your imperfections are what makes you so perfect..Can't you see ? You're not Father's greatest failure, your Father's greatest wonder. I could never be as human and empathetic as you are, I could never love them the way you can, because you understand them. Their desires, dreams and feelings are in you as well. In some way, I envy you. You'll always be closer to them than I'll ever be.."

Lucifer listens to your words with great attention and when you're finished, he looks at you like he's never looked at anyone before. He is full of gratitude and can't stop smiling at the abundance of kindness you had bestowed upon him. He kisses the palm of your hands, tears rolling down his cheeks and his heart swollen with adoration and devotion towards you.

" There is nothing great about humanity, but you seem to always see good in everything and everyone..You can't imagine how much I've missed you.."

You giggle as he peppers you face with kisses.

" I've missed you too, Luci..But, I think you should probably stop acting this way, or people will think you have a soft spot.."

You tease him and he takes a fake gasp before pointing a finger at himself.

" Me ?! Why never..?!"

You chuckle at his false startled expression before wrapping your hands around his waist to mumble against his shoulder.

" I love you, Luci..I know you don't believe me, but I really do."

He glances down at you with open tenderness before slowly petting the top of your head with care.

" I know, love..But, we both know that it will end in misery for the both of us.."

You smile up at him and kiss him on the cheek before replying with a shrug. You tighten your hold on him and make yourself even more comfortable by laying your head on his thighs.

" Misery with you is better than misery without you.."

He sighs loudly before looking down at you and seeing you suddenly asleep..Unaware that you were still somehow able to hear him, he whispers almost sorrowfully to himself.

" What hurts the most is that..You won't remember anything of what you just said.."

He watches your silent form for a while and takes a shaky breath before looking up at the sky, knowing that HE is listening.

" Punishing me wasn't enough ? You had to punish her as well ? How many centuries must you make her suffer and wait for something that will never happen ? You promised that when I would fall, she would stay safe..You gave me your word ! You turned around and left me to fall without her or you ! Can you imagine the pain I felt when I woke up in that dreadful place; alone and scared. And not only did you leave me, you took her away from me too ! You promised you wouldn't, and yet you did ! You gave up on us ! You gave up on me ! And just when I thought I would finally be able to forget her and live with Chloe, you send her to me and make me love her all over again ! What must I do to finally be able to forget ! I've done what you asked, over and over again ! I erased her memory every time she would come to see me ! I made sure that she would not remember all the moments we shared together after my fall ! And yet, you can't even keep an eye on her and let her run Hell alone ?! Why ?! To make me even more guilty ?! Every 100 years ! Every 100 years you let her come down here and make me suffer by erasing everything ! I thought that once I would be among them, she wouldn't be able to find me anymore, but as always, I'm trapped and must see the only person I love forget about me, over and over again.."

He starts crying and doubles in pain at the rage eating him up from the inside. This is where he feels it, a small tremor, a slight change in body position..He freezes in horror and looks down at you, to meet directly with your wide glassy eyes full of pain and grief.

"..Every 100 years ?.."

His breath stops as he understands that you've been listening to him and shakes his head at his own stupidity.

" Luci...? How many times did I come here to see you ?"

As he bites his lower lip in order not to answer you, you straighten up and ask again firmly, all joy having left your voice.

" How many times, Lucifer ?"

His eyes wander around the room before looking back at you and his heart tightens as he knows that he couldn't lie to you anymore.

" 50 times..You came 50 times and every time, you took a body and as soon as this body would reach its limit, you would die and get back up there with HIM..He would reset your memory and you would forget everything if I didn't do it first..while I remember everything. It hurts, Y/N..Just when I thought I could forget about you, he sends you again.."

You open your mouth agape at the news and look at the body you had taken and feel tears gathering up in your eyes. For centuries, you've fought for Lucifer's redemption, not even noticing that you were the one who was also being punished.

" This woman..Do you love her ?"

You suddenly ask and Lucifer stays silent for a moment before finally confessing.

" Not as much as you.."

You laugh at his answer before shaking your head and looking back at him with tears in your eyes, still full of compassion for him.

" But you will..You will love her with all of your heart and, knowing you, you will find a way for her to be by your side forever, something I can't be.."

He was about to deny your words, but you don't let him and stand up to walk towards the door. He quickly does the same and puts his hand over yours when you were about to use the handle to open the door.

" Please, angel..It is hard enough for me to know that I have very little time with you..Don't go."

He pleads and it takes all of your strength not to indulge in his request. You turn around and kiss him with a burning passion, to let him know that you weren't leaving him because you wanted to..But because you knew that there was nothing that you could do that wouldn't end up in tears and blood, because you love him. When he opens his eyes again, you are gone and he falls to his knees, knowing that it was probably the last time he would see you, or be intimate with you in this life. He knows that you've just given him the highest form of mercy there is: this kiss, signifying his freedom and the start of his new life..But then, why does it hurt so much ? As if you had just taken a part of himself with you..He looks up to see the car of Chloe that parks in front of the house, a very excited Trixie in her arms and wipes his tears away to smile at the family that he had learned to be a part of.

" So, is your friend gone ?"

Chloe asks, looking around to see if you were still in the house. Lucifer frowns before asking, confused.

" What friend ?"

One month later :

" Be safe on your way back, okay Trixie ?"

Trixie smiles up at you and nods vividly.

" Don't worry, my dad is coming to get me !"

You ark an eyebrow, wondering if Chloe had finally got herself a man to look after Trixie..not suspecting one bit that Lucifer would be the one entering your classroom to get Trixie. The little girl jumps in his arms and you can't help but laugh at her enthusiasm, as well as Lucifer's obvious awkwardness. When you make eye contact, you simply smile politely at each other and he turns around to get the girl back home. Perfect strangers. When he is gone however, you feel a pain in your chest and have to grip on the nearby table in order to support yourself. When you look up, you see Gabriel and smile bitterly, knowing why he was here..

" So, my time has come then, Gab ?"

He looks almost apologetic when he extends his hand towards you and answers affirmatively.

" You know the drill, Y/N..one month with him. You're the one who wished to share his burden..Hell is waiting.."

You close your eyes and nod in submission.

" I know..Lead the way, Gabriel."

Lucifer is feeling uneasy..He has this feeling that he knew that teacher somehow..But couldn't seem to recall where he could have seen her before..

" You know, the new teacher is really nice ! She got us some cake today, and said that I was going to become a very fine lady when I grow up !"

She puffs her chest out proudly and Lucifer smiles while they arrive at Chloe's house.

" Really ? And what else did she tell you ?"

Trixie frowns in deep concentration before answering him.

" Well..her name is Y/N..And when I said to her that I was friends with the devil, she told me to take care of him, as he is a very special friend.."

Lucifer chuckles before opening the door of his car and letting the little girl out to enter the house where her mother was trying desperately to find an explanation to her new case, not supernatural this time. It was rather refreshing..However, his thoughts come back to the earlier event when he had made eye contact with you, your smile had almost seemed..sad ? Y/N..Y/N..Where had he already heard that name before ? He searches in each corner of his memory, the feeling of knowing nagging and annoying him. He is in the middle of the driveway when he suddenly remembers and stops abruptly. His tires screech loudly on the pavement when he pulls back. He starts driving at a fast speed towards the school.

" Wait for me Y/N, I'm coming.."

You find yourself on the top of the school and look at Gabriel that seems to read your thoughts.

" He's not coming.."

You smile sadly at the prospect and nod understandingly.

" I know..Hell needs me, and he doesn't."

You take a big breath before opening your eyes, the last rays of sunlight reflecting in your eyes as your body starts shifting into his.

" Are we ready to go, Lucifer ?"

You smile at Gabriel's new name for you and nod before looking at yourself and smirking, the same smirk you had learned to love and hate as you were exercising how to do it in front of your mirror.

" Let's go, humans are such a boredom anyway !"

If Gabriel hadn't seen the transformation with his own eyes, he would have thought that it was the true Lucifer that was now standing before him..It is just when you deploy your white wings that he remembers that it is still you, under all of that pretend..You are both about to take your leave when you hear the loud bang of a car crashing nearby. You both look down and see Lucifer get out of the car, his eyes flashing a bright orange as he looks up at you. You shiver at the anger radiating from him and try to fly up after Gabriel. However, Lucifer shouts your name in such a guttural and ferocious way that you freeze.

" Y/N ! Don't you dare fly away from me ! I forbid you to go !"

You glance down at him and see that he has taken his true appearance back and each step he takes are trailed by little flames of Hell's fire. You shake your head and tear your eyes away from him to take a step back and jump in the air to follow Gabriel. Gabriel tries to warn you, but before he could utter a word, someone had tackled you to the ground in mid-air. When you look up, you see a very angry Lucifer on top of you and it's the first time that you are actually scared of him.

" Luci..? Wh..What are you..?!"

" Enough !"

He cuts you off with all of his mighty authority and you can't do anything but stay quiet as he glares at you.

" What do you think will happen if any of the demons down there recognizes you ?! What went through your little naive mind to think that that would ever work ?! You're an angel, Y/N ?! Come on, you really thought about the consequences of your actions ?!"

Your lower lip quivers at his harsh words and you feel hot tears rolling down your cheeks. He grins evilly at you before wiping your tears in a false gesture of sympathy.

" Aww..If you had done your researches like a good little angel, you would have known that Lucifer Morningstar doesn't cry.."

" Liar !"

You shout back and he smirks at your insult.

" See ? Progress."

He then stands up and yanks you up just as Gabriel flies down next to the both of you. He looks at the both of you before sighing and taking a step back, making you understand that he wouldn't take part of what was to unfold.

" I don't know what's going on, and I don't have the time to care..All I know is that I have to bring one of you in Hell before the gates close tonight.."

You and Lucifer look at each other and Lucifer is surprised to see you get on a fighting stance, but smiles at the determination in your eyes.

" You want to got to Hell ? Fine by me..But you'll have to go through me first."

Far from feeling threatened, Lucifer is amused by your strength of will and his smile widens. He slowly takes back his human form and cracks his fingers theatrically before gesturing for you to step closer with his index.

" Wanna fight the devil ? I must warn you, it plays dirty.."

You smile at his innuendo before running towards him and throw a punch at his face. He takes a step back, not having expected you to actually be fighting him, but quickly composes himself and tries to knock you out with a blow to the head. However, you're too fast and make him fall by round kicking his legs. You can't help but smile smugly at his startled expression.

" Have I forgotten to mention that I've been learning a thing ot two about fighting with Michael ?"

He groans at the name of his brother and quickly stands up to attack again. Soon, you are both fighting each other seriously and, blow after blow, both get tired. Gabriel doesn't even know which one is which at the end, when you both pass out. However, Time is running out and he decides to take the closest Lucifer to fly away. He succeeds in arriving to the gates just in time and when you wake up, you find yourself in Hell. You look around and see the billions of souls being tortured and it takes all of your self-control not to throw up and remain poised on your throne of stone. You close your eyes and take multiple breaths to calm yourself. When you open your eyes, you sit straight and whisper to yourself.

" Okay..Here we go, Lucifer..Wish me luck.."

[crhinge]

Breaking Down The Classic Rom-Com

I feel like I haven’t written a fun post in a hot sec so lets talk about one of my favorite subjects: Rom Coms

According to wikipedia, a Rom Com, also known as Romantic Comedy, is “a subgenre of comedy and slice-of-life fiction, focusing on lighthearted, humorous plot lines centered on romantic ideas, such as how true love is able to surmount most obstacles.” In the past, Romantic Comedies have also been called “Chick Flicks” but I think this is devaluing of both women and  the romantic comedy genre. 

The other day, I woke up to find that the most wholesome rom-com couple of all time reunited: Matty & Jenna (Aka Mark Ruffalo & Jennifer Garner). This got me thinking about the beauty of the Rom-Com and how unappreciated they can be. It has been years since we have seen a rom-com with the cultural impact of 13 Going on 30, and I would like to petition for more of them after a sad and painful year. 

I can already hear the millions (in my head this blog is extremely popular) of comments “What about To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before?!?” “What about The Kissing Booth?!?” And too that I say, "Good Riddance!” If you’re rating your rom coms on a TATBILB scale, or even WORSE The Kissing booth, I feel sorry for you. Truly I do. So let's dive into the best Rom Coms of all time, but first... 

What makes a Rom-Com good? Well let's start with a relatable as hell main character. I am talking a girl (sometimes guy), who has many flaws, but the audience can see themselves within her/him. Let's use Jenna Rink from 13 Going On 30 as an example. Well, she's literally a 13 year old in a 30 year olds body, but don’t we all still have a preteen hiding inside of all of us? She is 100% willing to be herself at every step, even if that means dancing thriller all alone. She touches on all of our insecurities, while teaching us how to break down our walls. 

Rom-Coms also need characters to make realistic choices. This does not mean that the movie itself is realistic, but rather than you can understand the choices the characters make. Again, 13 going on 30 does a fabulous job of this. Obviously, Jenna traveling in time because of wishing powder is not realistic, but the choices that her and her past self make are. Due to the insecurities of her childhood and a need to feel included, relevant, and powerful Jenna pushes important people out of her life, which happens to so many people in the real world. These decisions force her to miss out on the love of her life, and ultimately, the story ends sadly: the love of her life marries someone else and she is left with tears, wishing powder, and an old doll house. That is until she is able to travel back in time and change the course of her life. 

Lastly, Every classic Rom-Com couple needs to have chemistry. There. I said it. Hollywood loves just casting random famous actors without giving them a proper chemistry read. One great example of this is Julianne Hough and Josh Duhamel in Safe Haven. Both fun, famous, Hollywood actors who have zero chemistry. Mark Ruffalo and Jennifer Garner had more chemistry throwing back Razzles than those two did during an intimate sex scene. 

Alright, now that we have broken down the requirements of a Romantic Comedy, let's jump into the best and worst of all time.

Best: When Harry Met Sally. 9/10. A classic. A tale as old as time. Both Sally & Harry are very flawed, yet relatable characters. Sally is too picky and particular, while Harry is a player. They both suck at relationships, but make rational decisions based on their motivations. We all have friends like these two and their chemistry is on point, both on a friendship and romantic level. They bounce off of one another splendidly. 

Worst: Sleepless in Seattle. 1/10 I know, this is a strong take, but this is a terrible movie about a stalker. Meg Ryan (I don’t even remember her character's name) is the stupidest most unrelatable character I have seen in a long time. She is extremely unlovable, cheats on her SO emotionally, and flies across the country to stalk a man that she has never met before. And then you’re telling me that Tom hanks FALLS FOR HER? Nope. No. I refuse to except this. Plus, their chemistry in this is pretty mediocre (You’ve Got Mail is Way Better) and we only get to see them together once. 

Best: 10 Things I Hate About You. 8/10. I was tempted to leave all high School Rom-Coms off this list, but Heath Ledger is my exception. Talk about likability. Kat is a strong, powerful, independent woman who learns how to be more vulnerable while still being a feminist badass. We all wanted to be Kat growing up. Meanwhile Heath Ledger is the classic bad boy with a soft side, and who wasn’’t into that? Both characters grow into new people throughout the movie making them relatable, complex, and realistic. Not to mention the angel that is Joseph Gordon Levitt, who keeps the audience up beat and smiling throughout the course of this Shakespeare tale

Best: My Big fat Greek Wedding. 10/10.  Have you seen this film recently? Because it is an absolute DELIGHT and so relatable. It dives into the difficulty of family expectation and cultures merging. It also has the cutest proposal of all time with a realistic couple that fights for one another on a daily basis. You laugh. You cry. You get a dynamic cast with wonderful chemistry. You feel invested in the family and the relationship. Just a joyful wonderful film.

Worst: Something Borrowed. 0/10. If you’ve never seen this movie, don’t. Ginnifer Goodwin sleeps with her best friends fiancé and we’re supposed to be okay with it because she liked him first. Hard pass. And she ignores John Krazinski who is right in front of her. She is unlikable, unreliable, and makes dumb decisions that no one else would. 

Best: He’s just not that into you. 9/10  I will go to bat for this movie. It follows several realistic storylines in a Love Actually manor, except they actual seem legit. A woman realizing her boyfriend is never going to marry her. A girl facing the fact that maybe some guys just aren’t that into her, and she isn’t an exception to the rule. A man slowly making the decision to cheat on his wife as they are growing apart. A woman realizing that she is worth way more than her bastard husband. A woman realizing that the person she’s sleeping with will never leave his wife for her. It's compelling, has realistic characters that we can relate to, and still warms your heart in the end. 

Best: The Big Sick. 8/10. Okay to be fair, this is based on a true story so it automatically has realistic characters and decisions. Maybe I should leave this off of the list, but I wish this film got the recognition it deserves. Two lovable main characters who make mistakes that are understandable. Wonderful chemistry between Kumail and his girlfriend as well as her family. 

Best: About Time. 11/10 This is hands down the best Rom-Com of all time and Potentially the best film of all time as well. If you don’t cry in this movie you do not have a heart or soul. The characters are SO insanely likable and adorable.It touches on the importance of family and valuing time and how little of it we have. The chemistry within the whole cast is palpable, and we can all relate to at least one character, whether it is the protagonist Tim, his wife Mary, his sister Kit-Kat, or his father. 

Well it is important to point out the obvious here: this list is lacking diversity in a huge way. All but one of these movies follow a cis, straight, white couple, and that is extremely concerning. People have attempted to make more diverse rom-coms over the past few years, but they all seem to be lacking one of the three core components of what makes a rom-com great: Relatable, realistic, and great chemistry. For example. Crazy Rich Asians was a fantastic film, but the high level of wealth that Nick Young comes from, made his character difficult to relate to, and I’m sorry but the chemistry just wasn’t there for me. Always Be My Maybe’s characters fell flat and it’s not a film I would want to watch more than once. Love Simon made some huge waves for LGBTQ representation in the media, but that ending kiss was unrealistic along with his friends reaction to fining out he was lying, which left the movie anti-climactic by the end. 

Now, the most recent film on this list was made in 2017. And before that 2013. So where have all the Rom Coms gone? Why don’t we see more of them. There are a few Rom Coms that could be contenders on the “Best” list from the last couple of years that include a small amount of diversity: 

Yesterday 7/10. The big question here is does this count as a romantic comedy? The love story isn’t the main plot, but is definitely a large sub-plot. This movie features an interracial couple and is highly re-watchable. The main characters are entertaining, relatable, and have pretty good chemistry. We will see if it stands the test of time. 

The Broken Hearts Gallery 7/10. This movie has gotten NO recognition. The main character, Lucy, is an extremely likable 20 something, not unlike our Ginnifer Goodwin in He’s Just not that Into You. The plot is fun and predictable but keeps you watching. I don’t know if this one will stay on my list long, but it’s definitely up there. 

But here is my challenge to Hollywood: create some new, beautiful Rom Coms that celebrate diversity but that don’t throw away the relatable, realistic, and high chemistry characters that we are just waiting to fall in love with. It’s got like 16 ideas up my sleeve, so just give me a call Hollywood. 

[beef-brisket]

Lucifer had no idea what to say. He panicked seeing Adam dead last night. For a moment, he thought Adam found the blade again. But starvation? He didn't even realize that Adam hadn't been coming down for food. He was surprised no one brought him up anything. He honestly expected that no one would want to, but Charlie would have at least brought something up, right?

When Adam died during the extermination, Lucifer didn't even have time to really process it. After beating the shit out of Adam, his life and wellbeing wasn't really his biggest concern at that moment. But when he saw him on his bed, not moving under his massive wing, he didn't know what to think.

The way he called for him when he woke up after those nightmares, calling for Luci, he just got overwhelmed when he realized Adam was dead. Again. He probably shouldn't have been holding him, but he couldn't lose him again.

Lucifer stared at Adam while he yelled, he could hear the exhaustion.

Lucifer: I-I won't leave you, Adam-

Adam: bullshit- the last time you said that, you fucking left me-

Lucifer: not this time, Adam. I'm not leaving

Adam still pulled away from him, but Lucifer held on tighter. He could feel how weak he was. Dying from starvation in Hell was one of the worst ways to go. When you heal, you're still hungry, still weak, and most aren't able to even get themselves up to get something to eat. It's just a horrible, endless cycle.

Adam: why!? You left when I didn't want you to- and now you won't leave when you should just fuck off! D-do you know what it was like after you left Eden?! No-no one came to see me- for fucking months! You didn't come back for me- but you came back for her! It's never me- I'm never the first fucking choice- get the fuck off me, Lucifer! Stop touching me-!

Lucifer: I won't let you go, Adam. I care for you, I swear- I know I haven't shown it, but I do

Adam: j-just stop touching me-

Lucifer held tight, until Adam stopped trying to force his arms open. He did slowly release his grip as he felt Adam start shaking and close in on himself. He wasn't dying, but he was weakening. He was working himself up, so Lucifer eventually did let go.

Lucifer: Adam... please, I care about you

Adam: ...you came for her... you left for her... you killed me... you broke me... I know I'm not... beautiful like them- but I tried... I wanted to look like them, so you'd like me again... I tried

Lucifers heart hurt listening to Adams rambles. He wasn't being coherent, even though he was direction his words at Lucifer, he felt like he wasn't being spoken to.

Lucifer: Adam... you're perfect-

Adam: n-no... not then, not now... I'm flawed... I'm nothing... angels wanted another man... for Eve... but then Eve... betrayed Heaven... I was good enough for her then... she didn't need a new man... she could keep me...

Lucifer had no idea the Angels wanted to make another man. Adam was perfect, he still was. Adam was loyal to fault in Eden, and after he died.

Lucifer: why would they want a new man, Adam?

Adam: I was alone... I broke... they don't want a broken man to start humanity... fucking funny, isn't? I go on and on about being the first man, like I'm fucking prideful about it... it's all I have... a title... that doesn't mean anything, to anyone... I nearly lost it... yet it's all I am... all I'll ever be...

Lucifer slowly hugged Adam again. This time, he let Lucifer hold him. Maybe he was too tired to fight him off? Lucifer didn't know. All he did know was that he hated hearing about Eden, especially in this light. He had no idea the angels were going to get rid of Adam, Eve biting the apple saved him. Lucifer saved him. But not in the way Adam needed.

Lucifer: i-im... so sorry, Adam. I wasn't there for you, and I should have been. I was still your angel- please let me help you... I don't want you dying again- please... let me get you something to eat...

Adam: ...I let myself go... I'm okay, I can handle it...

Lucifer: no- no, I lied Adam, I didn't mean what I said that day- prince of lies, right? I won't leave you Adam, not this time, please let me help you...

Adam didn't move or say anything. Lucifer hoped he was just thinking. After a minute, he looked down and saw his golden eyes were lifeless. Again. Lucifer couldn't stop the tears this time. He wasn't going to leave him, he'll be here when he woke up.

How the fuck did he get this bad? How was he this mentally damaged? Did Heaven not see what was going on with him? Then again, during their meeting with Sera, she was pretty cold toward Adam.

Sera: I knew you weren't good enough for Heaven, and this just proves it.

Adam: m-mom- please! I did what you wanted- the exterminations- i did it all-!

Sera: you went against the contract. You'll rot there Adam, just like you should have when you died on earth.

Lucifer was actually a bit shocked at how harsh Sera was to Adam, she wasn't like that before, but at the time, fuck. He fucking laughed, didn't he? Sera was still standing there, didn't even offer him a glance. Not even while he was laughing at Adam.

He really was horrible, wasn't he? But he fucking deserved it- he attacked Charlie! And all of Pride for a few thousand years! He deserved it.

Didn't he?

He needed to get Adam ready for when he woke up. He'll need to eat straight away. But Lucifer couldn't move. Couldn't stop staring into his eyes. Even though he was dead, Lucifer could still see the last of his tears run down his face.

He didn't want to let go, not even to sit Adam up. Maybe a few more minutes, he had time. He'll find a way to stop his hurting. He owed him more than that, but this will be the start.

Lucifer kissed the top of Adam's head, using his hand to push his hair and antenna off his face.

Even as a moth, Adam was still as beautiful as that sunny morning in Eden, when Lucifer first lay eyes on him.

Moth!Adam having a nightmare! This takes place a few days after arriving in Hell.

@fanofstuff01 MOTH ADAM

---

Charlie: Hey, dad? Could you go get Adam up? He's going to miss out on the group activity!

Lucifer: Honey, if he isn't even going to put I the effort, he shouldn't be here!

Charlie: dad- please, he's only just got here. This is a big change for him. Can you just go wake him?

Lucifer reluctantly agreed and made his way to Adams bedroom. Charlie put him on a floor that had no other members, thinking it would help him get use to things.

Arriving at Adam's door, Lucifer smiled. He decided to take the opportunity to scare Adam. It was almost Halloween, after all.

Lucifer walked softly to the top of Adam's bed. He could see his antennas flicking about. Ljcifer stood by his head for a few minutes, waiting for the perfect opportunity to scare him.

Adam: mm- no, stop... don't leave... please don't leave...

Lucifer chuckled. It must have been some popr winner in Heaven Adam was talking about.

Adam: L-Lu... please stay- pick me, please... don't leave... p-please choose me-

Lucifer stopped laughing and stared at the man. Oh... it was Eden he was having a nightmare about. Shit. He backed away as Adam started to thrash, his wings unfurling.

Lucifer had no idea no idea what to do. The poor guy even started crying. He decided to wake him up. Lucifer couldn't watch Adam cry and grip his blankets. It hurt too much.

Lucifer: Adam... ADAM-!

Lucifer reached over to shake his shoulder but jumped and teleported out of reach of Adam and his wings when Adam suddenly shot up, breathing hard.

Lucifer wasn't too familiar with Moth demons, he only knew of Valentino, and even then, he hadn't had many interactions with him, so he wasn't too sure how good Adams' eye slight was.

Adam: Luci...?

Lucifers eyes widened at the nickname- and the way Adam said it. It reminded him of Eden. Adam sounded so desperate and hopeful. Hopeful that Lucifer was there with him, that his nightmare wasn't true.

Lucifer wasn't sure if he wanted to say anything, he hadn't noticed him yet. That was until he noticed Adam looking around the room, eyes landing on Lucifer.

He felt like he should say something. So he waves and smiles, but just as he's about to say something, he heard Adam choke out a sob and bury his head in his hands, his lower arms wrapped around his thin torso.

Adam: t-thats right... you hate me... why would you be here...?

Lucifers heart broke. He didn't hate Adam. He was an asshole sometimes and a bastard for attacking his daughter, but he didn't hate him. He felt like he should, but he couldn't.

After a few minutes of crying, Adam tried to find his phone. Lucifer could see it on the side table, so he made the phone float in front of his hand. Adam didn't notice the magic, but found his phone. He squinted until his eyes were met with the bright light.

Adam grounded when he saw the time. He was really late now.

Adam: ...fuck it... they don't want me there, anyway... s-should have j-just stayed d-dead

Lucifer stood in the corner of Adam's room for 20 minutes. All he did was hug his pillow and cry. He could tell Adam was tired, but he couldn't fall back asleep.

He never knew how depressed Adam was. But then again, he'd never a good conversation with Adam since he got here. Lucifer really took the opportunity to get as much payback as possible now that he had a contract with him.

He wonders if all of this started when he called him an unlovable piece of shit, that not even the scumiest angels wanted. He knew he overstepped, judging by the look on his face and the lack of response.

For the next week, Lucifer stood in Adams room before he went to sleep and before he woke up. It was always the same: Adam would cry himself to sleep, and he'd have a nightmare about being abandoned and wake up shaking, covered in tears in the morning.

As Lucifer was in his room this night, he was hoping it would be different. Adam was with Angel for most of the day and seemed to be happier. But as soon as Adam sat on the edge of his bed, he knew it wasn't going to be a good night. It was actually about to get a lot worse.

Adam started crying as soon as he closed and locked his door. Fiddling with something in his pocket. Lucifer could see him playing with something as he sat on the edge of the bed.

It wasn't until Adam sat up straight that Lucifer saw it was the angelic needle Nifty originally used to kill him. Where the fuck did he find that!?

Lucifer really didn't plan to get involved when it came to his night watching, but Adam pressed the blade against his scar from the original attack, and start to push in far enough for his dark red blood to start welling up and running down his chest.

Lucifer: NO-!

Lucifer jumped into action. Snapping the blade out of his hands and placing it in Lucifer's hands.

Adam instantly jumped and looked around. Lucifer could see the pain in his big, golden eyes.

Adam: L-Luci-fer... Luci... ?

Lucifer couldn't bring himself to say anything as Adam looked around. He covered his mouth as he felt a tear fall. Adams eyes locked him his. Shit.

Adam: ...please...? Luci?

Lucifer squeezed his eyes shut.

Adam: Not even allowed to finish the job, huh...? I'm just g-giving them what they w-want...

He opened them slowly, and he heard the rustling of Adam's blankets.

That night was worse.

So much worse.

Lucifer has never seen Adam look so small even at his towering height of 11". Adam curled up, hugging a pillow as tightly as he can.

Adam cried to himself all night. He didn't fall asleep at all. Just cried and begged for Lucifer. For it all to end.

Lucifer finally learned how good Adams eye site was. Hed often looked directly at him but saw nothing.

All night, Lucifer just gripped the angelic blade and stood still all night, hoping Adam wouldn't hear his sobbing.

Dude my fucking heart 😭

Adam knew Lucifer was there, he had to be. Blades just don't evaporate out of your fucking hand.

Why couldn't he just let Adam die for good? Lucifer didn't even want him here, nobody did. Sure he started getting along well with Angel but big deal.

Other than height being a moth demon was fucking stupid. He could barely see! He even had to have the largest print enabled on his phone so he could see to use it.

Adam ran out of tears quickly, he was dehydrated from it and he wasn't exactly drinking water to put anything back.

Lucifer never wanted him, so why not just let Adam go? To torture him probably.

Oh look, Adam did still have some tears to cry.