#but like...the framing...I'm not wrong right
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Yes, the "all characters are fictious or used fictiously" disclaimer started in the 1930s after Princess Irina Alexandrovna sued over a character based on her in a movie about Rasputin.
Though in modern terms that's used for films and TV shows far more than it is for books, and it doesn't actually do anything bc people can still sue for defamation - however, that's extremely rare bc the First Amendment protects most portrayals of real people, and under American defamation law, you have to prove they knowingly and maliciously defamed you for it to count
However, between 1915 and 1952 movies didn't actually have First Amendment protections, since the Supreme Court decided they were strictly "business" in 1915 (actually the 1915 case seems convinced that freedom of speech only existed for a free press and also says theater doesn't count) and then overturned that in 1952. That's why the Hays Code existed, the industry created it to forestall government censorship that would've been possible at the time. So I guess the disclaimer was more necessary then
As I understand it, books are given much more leeway. I know they are in terms of brands, something else people mentioned in the replies: for instance, Ready Player One the book was able to write in all those 80s pop culture characters freely while the movie had to pay for the rights. Except if they quote song lyrics, then they have to pay up the wazoo and their editors will yell at them
But I think also Victorian lit grounded itself in reality a lot more. Like how fantastical stories of the time are often framed as "found" narratives - people were just less willing to buy in to something completely fictional. Unless I'm wrong and they weren't
Love the random censorship in Victorian novels. Mr. ------- came down from -----shire in the summer of 18--. Who? Where? When? Wouldn't you like to know, book boy
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I don't know what to think about all this and if the SA or anything else in Robby's story will be addressed.
Take Billy's interview. They act like Robby's side of the story doesn't matter. He is inconsequential. It's about Johnny and Miguel. In canon, Robby is framed as wrong and at fault for how Johnny treats him and for having trauma, even though Johnny is the parent and his behavior is immensely traumatic for Robby. Johnny has done nothing to make things right with/for Robby, while Robby is the one who was abused by Johnny while he prioritized his new family and Robby had to put all of his trauma aside to be a part of Johnny's new family, that narratively Robby's still not treated as completely part of.
Take the SA ig reel. They act like Robby's side of the story doesn't matter. He is inconsequential. It's about Tory and Zara. In canon, Robby is framed as the cheating boyfriend who got drunk and "made a mistake" because he "got played", although he was drunk and can't remember what happened while Zara intentionally targeted him, can remember, and doesn't care that he can't. Robby should be focused on as the one who can't catch a break, but he's not.
Take the apartment fight marketing posts calling it a "therapy session". They act like Robby's side of the story doesn't matter. In canon, they only show Miguel's flashbacks and have Robby take all fault too. The marketing was for Miguel's side of the story. (Tanner wasn't there for interviews for s5, but still no one brought up Robby's side.) They act like Robby's side of the story doesn't matter. He is inconsequential. It's about Miguel only, although the school fight was traumatic for Robby too. Robby does admit this in canon, but it was still in service of the apology to Miguel. Not to mention, the apartment fight itself was plain abuse on Robby by Johnny to force him to be friends with Miguel. This was abuse, not therapy.
Even the school fight was framed as if Miguel didn't do anything wrong, his "I'm sorry" instantly made him innocent, and Robby's the one at fault for it all because of the kick and accidental injury. Miguel had done so much to Robby in that fight, but Robby's side is inconsequential. It's all about Miguel. Robby was and is still scapegoated, that is still shown and hinted at (like in the college essay) but it remains unaddressed. I don't have any of the post s2 or post s3 marketing on hand, but no doubt the marketing would not have shown Robby's side of the story.
There's more to address in Robby's story, but you see...
In a way, how they handled the SA isn't isolated because they literally handle Robby's whole story this way. I mean, child abandonment and replacement are even more recognizable as traumas for the child, but people still are taking the parent's side and are happy he replaced his son, and the show has marketing material promoting it.
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part 2 prof! Izuku part 1 here
synopsis: after a series of ignored apologies, you accepted (kinda) what's happened and decided to finally respond... then months go by and you've gotten over him... you think...
pairing: professor! Izuku Midoriya x student! reader. college AU
cw: angst to fluff! by not so popular demand lol! just pretend that y'all had conversations in between or something, before the party message.
blurb word count: 800+
now gimme your souls! *evil laughs* (there are three outfit photos so u can choose from them)
people were packed in the campus auditorium, sounds of murmuring and the bass of the music slightly overwhelming your ears. your friends spotted you standing alone, becoming one with the wall behind you and scuttled over offering you a drink to sip on while they chatted. they went on about, the course, how difficult finals we're, all the months of stress and boring lectures. you added to their complaints here and there, making light conversation that you didn't really pay attention to, as your eyes drifted around.
you vaguely pay attention to them raving about how great everyone's looking, how surprised they were that they passed, etc etc. and then, he walked in... tall, slim, neatly tousled green hair that exposed his forehead, dressed in a dark green shirt one size too small, squeezing his forearms at the point where he rolled them up, and black slacks, accessoried with an all might buckled belt, that held it to his waist.
might not have been much to him, but to you... it was fucking runway worthy... and you froze, the sight of him bringing back that fuzzy feeling in the pit of your stomach. the buffet table was suddenly the most interesting thing in the room as you averted your eyes from your, former professor.
"hey there," he greeted, walking up behind you.
you slowly turned around, and was soon face to face with that signature, irresistible smile of his, you tried looking away from his almost perfect lips and your eyes landed on his... big mistake... but oh how they looked like emerald gems being held hostage behind glass frames, sparkling with the flashing lights of the party.
"is something wrong?" he asked tilting his head to the side before looking over himself.
"oh! uh- no!" you awkwardly reassured. god you wanted gouge your eyes out right now... "I was starting to think you weren't gonna show," you teased, offering a small smile.
"yeah," he chuckled, "i actually wasn't sure either, but I thought it'd be nice to see y- everyone, one last time." he continued, rubbing the back of his neck.
"everyone seems so different out of the classroom huh?" was your attempt at small talk. and you mentally slapped yourself across the face.
"I was thinking the same thing!" he beamed, "it's nice to see you- all! having some fun. it's well deserved." he fiddled with his wristwatch, then with the ends of his shirt on his forearms.
"I'm sorry, parties aren't really my thing..." he admitted, breaking into a nervous sweat and you rested a hand on his to stop his fiddling.
"did you save me that dance... professor?" you chuckled, nodding toward the dancefloor where people had started to gather.
"Izuku," he corrected, "i'm not your professor anymore..." and he took your hand in his, leading you to the center of the dancefloor, weaving through te crowd of people. you've never slow danced before, but by God, at the moment all you wanted was too feel his body heat, as you swayed to whatever song the DJ decided to play.
the people around you paired up, hugging each other close as the music started, and you both followed them. you take initiative, stepping forward to rest your right hand on his shoulder and your left a little lower down his arm.
he hesitated for second, hand hovering over the curve of your waist, "i-is this okay?" he asked, ever the gentleman and.
"more than okay." you mumbled, the warmth of his palms resting awkwardly on your waist, quietly pulled you in as you began to sway in each other's arms.
the dance progressed, and the awkwardness that was there earlier, was nowhere to be seen. it felt as if your bodies were moving in perfect sync, your steps following his, as you closed your eyes and rested your head on his chest, he moved his other hand to rest lower down your back keeping you there.
for a long moment you were standing there, his scarred arms holding you close to him like he didn't want to let go. not that you were complaining... but the music had been changed to something else... more upbeat to bring life back to the party.
"thank you." you smiled and you could hear his heart rate pick up.
"was that good enough?" he whispered, rubbing circles on your back with his thumb. and you nodded against his chest. you stood there for a singular moment longer, before–
"well, i better go say hi to everyone else!" he said, reverting to his awkward state, "don't let me stop you from enjoying yourself!" and he was still holding your right hand in his.
"right," you exhaled, as he let go and you were heading off to grab another drink. "see ya around, Izuku."
"yeah," he chuckled, yet again awkwardly scratching the back of his head, "see ya around."
mlist!
#bbkoolkatz#kkz mha#kkz smau#kkz fluff#mha x reader#x reader#x reader writer#izuku x y/n#izuku midoria x reader#izuku midoriya x reader#izuku x reader#mha smau#mha au#mha izuku#bnha x reader#bnha fanfiction#bnha x fem!reader#bnha x gender neutral reader#bnha au#bnha x you#bnha x y/n#smau#bnha smau#izuku x you#midoriya x reader#midoriya x y/n#midoriya x you#izuku midoriya#x reader fanfiction#fluff
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nothing matters | lance stroll
summary: the first smutmas installment. crying after sex? slightly more common than you would think.
pairing: lance stroll x female reader!
warnings: depictions of sex, very emotional lmao my girl is stressed the fuck out and needs lance to help calm her down with his dick <3, consent checks are sexy! mentions of anxiety, crying after sex, super sweet lance and lots of aftercare.
"holy fuck, angel, you feel fucking incredible."
lance's fingers fisted the bedsheets as he continued to thrust, keeping a steady pace. she moaned underneath him, sharp fingernails digging into his back. her arousal was dripping on the sheets, his cock bringing her to the brink of pleasure.
and somehow, it still wasn't enough.
"more." she whispered, using her legs to try and draw him closer. "lance, baby, please."
"grab my hand, baby." he encouraged, taking her hand in his. "i know you love it when you feel close to me." his voice was husky as he kissed her, groaning into her mouth.
she had come from work as a ball of nerves. it had been a long day from the start to the end of her shift. everything that could have gone wrong in the office had, and by lunch she'd given herself a migraine. when she came home, she had basically thrown herself at lance, hoping that there was something that could be done to loosen her up a bit.
"you're doing so good, princess. just hang on for me and let me take you there."
she nodded, mind starting to go fuzzy from pleasure. her breathing was laboured, her chest starting to feel heavy. the big ball of anxiety that had settled on her sternum earlier that day was fighting for release.
"deep breaths, sweetheart. come on, breathe with me."
lance paused, resting his forehead against hers, and she met his eyes as she started to inhale deeply. after a few breaths, she felt the pain in her chest start to subside.
she was safe. lance was her sweet lover boy, and he was making her feel incredible.
"you okay?"
"yeah." she swallowed, resting one hand against the side of his face. "just a little tense still."
"do you want to keep going?"
"yes, please."
lance jumped right back in, starting slowly before building up the pace of his thrusts. she closed her eyes and arched her back, moaning as lance's cock slipped in and out of her, one of his hands moving to her clit.
"that's it, sexy girl. fall apart on my cock. you're in good hands. let go for me, you're safe, darling." he knew he was running his mouth, starting to ramble a little, but he also knew what she needed to feel safe and loved <3.
"jesus christ, lance." she breathed, burying her face in the warm skin of his shoulder. he smelled like expensive cologne and sweat, but she wasn't really paying attention to all of that.
"i've got you." he breathed, lips ghosting over her neck as he used both arms to pull her close, hips driving into her under the covers.
"fuck!" she came with something that sounded similar to a sob, the pressure building and building and building until it popped like a very anti-climactic balloon.
she fell limp in her lover's arms, a few tears escaping from the corner's of her eyes. she breathed deeply, chest shaking as she realized what was happening. she drew back from lance, swiping her fingers under her eyes to clear away the salty tears.
"god, i needed that." she sniffled quietly. "thank you."
concern crept into lance's features as he pulled out of her, moving to discard the filled condom. "sweet girl, what's wrong?"
"nothing's wrong. these are good tears, i promise!" she tried to laugh. "i'm just under a lot of stress at work and my emotions are a fucking wreck right now. i don't know what's wrong with me."
unwilling to watch his lover fall to pieces in such a way, lance pulled her close to his chest, hoping that feeling his strong arms wrapped around her slender frame, or hearing the beating rhythm of his heart, would be enough to bring her back to the present.
"hey, pretty girl, it's okay. you're okay. nothing is wrong with you. you just needed a release, and i totally understand that. i enjoyed every moment with you. you did so good, princess. you always do."
he kissed her head softly, brushing a flyaway bang out of her eyes. he kissed her closed eyelids, and then her lips, holding her softly and tenderly.
"i want you to go and splash some water on your face and put on something comfortable. i'm going to go and get you a glass of water and something sweet, okay? and then we can curl up in bed and watch a few episodes of mike and molly. if you're up for it, we can even go for a round two later."
she smiled softly, leaning up to kiss him. "i like the sounds of that."
climbing out of bed, she wrapped the throw blanket form the foot of the bed around her body before tip-toeing to the bathroom, where she ran a brush through her hair and splashed some water on her face. she dressed in her warmest and coziest flannels before pressing a cold compress to each of her eyes.
she heard movement in the bedroom and poked her head out of the ensuite. lance was balancing a tray filled with two glasses of ice water, two mugs of hot chocolate and what appeared to be two massive slices of christmas cheescake.
"did you make cheesecake while i was out?"
lance smiled sheepishly, playing with the hair at the back of his neck. "i gave it a try while you were at work. i actually burned the crust on the first batch, so i gave those ones to scotty. this is the second attempt."
she laughed, pulling him in for a hug and a soft kiss. "i'm sure they're perfect. i love you."
"i love you more."
#lance stroll smut#lance stroll x reader#formula one x reader#f1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 smut#formula one smut#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 smut#formula one imagine#formula 1#formula one#smutmas: tasia's version
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This was a really fun and interesting exercise, I got 88% right (so 6 mistakes out of 50). I probably spent longer than average staring at each picture, though. I'll put my blunders under the cut.
(I went into the google form and noted down all my answers, then went back to check the solutions all at once to avoid "learning as I go" and skewing the results.)
14 — I called it AI too fast after I couldn't make immediate sense of the logic behind some details of the design.
17 — I had never seen AI images in this style, and I'm not very interested in this style in general, so I had no frame of reference of what "tells" to look for. I couldn't find any obvious tells so I guessed human and guessed wrong.
25 — This one left me speechless, I was absolutely certain it was AI, the most "obvious" one so far too! Definitely made me reconsider some biases.
26 — This one is embarrassing because I actually knew this painting. But you see, single subject portraits and landscapes is what AI excels at, so I called it AI too fast without thinking it could be one of the OGs.
44 — I was certain I had seen this painting before, obviously I was misremembering haha. AI tends to fumble crowds but in this case it did a great job.
49 — I had never seen AI art in this style before, aiming for less detail instead of maximized detail. Fooled!
I think I would have scored lower seeing each picture randomly in the wild but knowing roughly half of the answers had to be AI I knew it was most likely the single subject portraits and the landscapes because it couldn't be the multiple figure interactions, animals, complex architecture, etc. because AI struggles a lot with those.
Last month, over 11,000 people took Astral Codex Ten's survey to see if they could they tell the difference between 50 human-made art and AI-generated images. The results were humbling for humans, especially ones who professed a loathing for AI art.
Most participants stumbled through the test, scoring just 60% — barely better than flipping a coin. What tripped them up? Our preconceptions about art styles, it turns out, are deeply ingrained. When people saw classic Impressionist paintings, they confidently declared them human-made (and were often wrong). When they encountered digital art, they quickly labeled it as AI (and were frequently mistaken).
Perhaps the most ironic finding was about people who claimed to despise AI art. When these AI critics picked their favorite pieces without knowing their origin, they consistently chose AI-generated works. Even among those who rated their hatred of AI art at maximum levels, their top two favorite pieces were created by machines.
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I have nothing against op but "sucks that trans women are having to support trans men :/" is just wild. When 90% of posts about transmisogyny end with "and that's why trans men suck", who is really putting the conversation about transmisogyny on hold for trans men? Probably the people who keep making transmisogyny about trans men??
Queer discourse always sucks, it sucks that members of our own community always have to defend each other against each other, but it's also kind of our responsibility to defend each other and anyone who's not a complete asshole will get that. So to be like "I'm sorry that you with your higher concerns have to debase yourselves for little ol us" is weird!!
I get your point and agree with it, but I do think you're reading a bit much into the post. I understand that they were framing it as it being a burden trans women are shouldering, taking away time and energy that could be spent on their own specific issues. You read that correctly. Nonetheless, I feel there's a broader context to take into account.
Transmascs are bombarded with messaging that makes quite a lot of them need transfems to have to tell them that no, they're not misogynistic for existing, and those transfems then have to use their relative authority in the discussion as the people claimed to be the Most Victim to shoot that shit down. I don't consider that a burden on me, but rather an exhausting and frustrating situation to be in for transmascs having to rely on the transfems vocally in their favor to tell people to knock it off because their own voices are diminished and it puts them in a very demeaning position.
So I think all that plays a part in the OP's feelings which I find understandable and coming from a place of more than just "it sucks trans women are having to show solidarity." It sucks having to go to your sister and ask her to get your bullies to leave you alone. It makes you feel guilty for relying on her and it makes you feel less powerful for not being able to do it yourself.
I think in retrospect I really regret not having added anything to it because you are right that solidarity should be the default expectation and I don't want transmascs to feel like their problems are a burden. I love my brothers and it's my sincere pleasure to advocate for them.
Truthfully, if not for this discourse I would be just about useless to the world. I can't advocate for my own issues, not only lacking the circumstances to even attempt doing anything IRL if I wanted to but also being horrifically triggered engaging with the outside world unless I ignore it as much as possible. When I used Reddit as my primary social media outlet I literally had lowkey PTSD from how many times I was accidentally exposed to news stories and had to be very careful to avoid them.
But so many people tell me I have a positive impact on them and their life. As much as I hate these circumstances, I'm happy to have found something I can do for others, and there's nothing wrong with needing your sister's help. <3
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But Home is Nowhere- Chapter 12 Pt2
Pairing(s): Lucien x Plus Size Reader, Azriel x Plus Size Reader, and Ruhn Dannan x Plus Size Reader.
Summary: Azriel and Reader finally start to bond bringing about some strange feelings that Azriel isn't sure how to process. It's made all the more complicated when Azriel confronts Ruhn about his actions.
Word Count: 5.8 K
Warnings: Mentions of nudity, sexually suggestive dialogue (no smut)
Author's Note: I'm still in a bit of a funk, and with the holidays coming up, things may be a bit slower. So I apologize for things slowing down. I can't thank you all enough for the support that this fic is getting along with some of my other little stories.
As always, a HUGE thank you to my beta reader @hardcoremarvelfan for all her help with this chapter. She really helped out with the struggles I was having for the Azriel and Ruhn scene and I don't think that I could have gotten past that block without her!
Series Masterlist Divider by @/tsunami-of-tears
Previous: Chapter 12 pt1 Next: Chapter 13
A half hour passed by quickly and Azriel was back at the front of the townhouse waiting for (Y/N) to emerge. He sent in a shadow to let her know of his arrival, even though she still appeared uncomfortable around them, she seemed to do better with a single shadow at a time. He couldn’t help but wonder if she had the same reactions to Ruhn’s shadows as she did with his.
When she finally joined him in front Azriel drank in the sight of her. He knew instantly that this wasn’t a dress Rhysand had originally picked out for her, but one that was very likely picked with either the assistance of Mor or Bryce. The simple silver off shoulder sweater dress was perfect for her frame.
“Wow.” He whispered to himself.
“I know right. I never thought that I would have the opportunity to actually wear this. Bryce picked it out. Apparently she wanted to take me to this place called Rita’s here. I told her I haven’t been out to a club in like a decade… literally.”
“Wait, how old are you?” Azriel asked, realizing that was something he had never learned about her.
“How old do I look?” She challenged. Azriel paused for a moment as she looked down from the stair stoop of the townhouse.
“I’m not answering that. Not if I want to continue living,” He smiled.
“Good boy,” She quipped.
A couple hours later, Azriel and (Y/N) returned to the townhouse after the concert. They decided to walk back from the concert hall and the entire time she spent gushing about the experience. He noted each of her hand movements as she talked, the way she walked slightly angled towards him. He was surprised that she hadn’t tripped on the cobble stone path in the high heels she wore. Azriel smiled the entire time she spent describing the music, her descriptions even provided him with insights into the pieces he had never considered before.
However, her chatty demeanor quickly dissolved the minute they approached the townhouse, which was still as dark as they had left it before leaving for the concert. Azriel watched as the sparkle that had been in her eyes throughout the performance slowly dissipated. It was starting to get late and it was clear that Ruhn had still not yet returned from whatever Rhys and Cassian were having him do.
“I’m sure he will be back soon,” He reassured her. However, she didn’t bother to acknowledge him. Instead she squared her shoulders, entering the townhouse as if nothing was wrong and resumed their conversation.
“So a requiem in my world also serves the purpose of remembering and honoring the dead,” She explained. “One of the largest religions has a very specific ritual surrounding it and many composers have set music to the prayers that make up the Mass. It’s honestly fascinating to see the same occurring here, but with a completely different religious base.” Azriel couldn’t help but smile as she continued to talk about what she found most enjoyable about the concert. “What were the parts of this one again? I’m so used to the Latin from my world,” She looked at him and Azriel’s mind froze for a half second before he remembered what she asked.
“So there are eight segments, the first seven are based on the elements of life that the Mother placed in her Cauldron to create Pyrthian, which are Darkness, Sun, Moon, Earth, Water, Sky, and Fate. The final segment is the standard prayer that the Fae recites to those that are dying and was added much later.” He explained as they entered the parlor.
“Yes I recognized the prayer. My mother taught me that one. It’s been passed down in my family for generations.” Her previous excitement was diminished, but she was making an effort to not let her disappointment in Ruhn’s continued absence show. “I also really enjoyed the segments for Moon and Earth. I am so impressed with this composer’s ability to encapsulate the imagery of each concept. It reminded me more of “The Planets” by Holst than a liturgical mass of traditional requiems in my world. It’s fascinating. And see this was one of my favorite things about music, the ability to allow us to gain insight into a wholly different culture through sound and the emotions it can help us experience. Oh! And…I’m rambling again…” She trailed off, but Azriel truly didn’t mind. There was a long pause before she spoke again.
“Thank you,” She whispered. “Wow…I didn’t think I’d ever thank you for anything if I’m being honest.” Azriel chuckled, slightly shaking his head.
“Just glad that I could help, even for a few moments.” He admitted as they sat down in the parlor. The conversation between them dwindled, the silence more comfortable than it had been in the past. But just as the silence grew, so did her anxiety.
“I should head up to bed soon.” Her voice was quiet and tried to mask the worry. He watched as she chewed on her lower lip, wondering if she was aware of how frequently she looked towards the clock on the wall. He noted that it was getting late, well past midnight. He also noted how Ruhn had still not arrived.
“Will you be needing more of the tonic soon?” He asked, trying to keep a conversation going, hoping that it could possibly lead to a new topic to help ease her mind. She merely continued to chew on her lower lip and began to pick at her nails.
“He’s never been home this late before,” Her whisper was her only response. “It’s been a week. I was hoping to talk to him tonight…I can’t…” Her eyes flicked to the clock again.
“I’m sure he’ll be back soon,” Azriel tried to reassure. “But what is it you can’t do?”
“I can’t take the tonic tonight. If I take it for more than...a week at a time…” She sighed. “That’s when I pretty much reach my limit before I start to build a tolerance for opiates. After that I notice that I have to start upping the dosage to have the same effect. And that…that just won’t be good for me in the long run.” Azriel nodded in understanding, his own mother experienced the same issue from time to time. He watched as she continued to chew on her lip and pick at her nails. He wanted to rest his hands upon her before she hurt herself again but stopped himself. He could tell she was lost in thought and his touching her suddenly had the potential to undo all the progress they made over the past year.
“Would you…would you like for me to stay here until he shows up?” Azriel asked tentatively. She nodded, her eyes still mostly glazed over from whatever scenario was playing out in her mind. “Go upstairs then and get some rest. I’ll let Cassian know that you won’t be at the training tomorrow.” She nodded again, making her way towards the staircase. Azriel watched closely, but remained a few steps behind her. As soon as she closed the bedroom door, he took a steadying breath and plopped himself on the staircase.
Azriel sat on the center of the staircase, head bowed down as his elbows rested on his knees. It had been a couple of hours since (Y/N) went to bed, though his shadows informed that it was not at all a restful sleep. His own hearing could attest to her experiencing at least one partial nightmare that she was able to wake herself from without screaming. After the first hour of waiting for the Midgardian male to return he had decided that he was going to have a small chat with Ruhn upon his return.
A few minutes later, Azriel heard the beating of Cassian’s wings in front of the townhouse. Given the hour it was slightly unusual for him to even be awake this late, much less out and about town. For a slight moment, Azriel even wondered if something may have happened to Ruhn. That thought was quickly dismissed as a second set of uneven steps were heard all the way from the gate.
As soon as the pair reached the front door Azriel was able to smell the stale and bitter stench of ale. Once the door opened the varying scents of different females were added to the mix. Azriel felt the shadow of rage begin to build within his gut. If the scents of the females truly indicated what he assumed, then he’d have every reason to physically beat some sense into Ruhn rather than just listen to whatever bullshit he may have spun as an explanation for his behavior.
As soon as Ruhn stumbled through the door, he made a beeline for the parlor, falling face first on the couch. Cassian stood in the entryway, his gaze moving towards Azriel. “Go easy on him brother,” Cassian’s voice almost sounded defeated. “He’s been a mess all week and I figured he could use a break. So, I took him to Rita’s. He was quite the novelty amongst the females, I almost wonder if I should have kept a better eye on him.” Azriel stood from his spot on the stairs, nodding his acknowledgment of Cassian’s words, but his eyes remained on the other clearly exceedingly drunk male.
Azriel descended the stairs turning to Cassian and sighed. “I got it from here.” Cassian nodded, leaving the townhouse and returning to his own home. With his arms crossed Azriel entered the parlor and stopped in the other male’s line of sight. Or at least it would have been his line of sight had Ruhn’s eyes had been open.
“What happened between you and (Y/N)?” Azriel questioned. Ruhn merely groaned in response, arm falling off the side of the couch. Azriel sighed again, closing his eyes to take a deep breath and keep the building rage at a simmer. “She said you made her feel ‘forgotten.’ You of all people.” This time Ruhn managed to release a sequence of incoherent noises, only a few words making any sense.
“Stupid… can’t… gonna…up…”
Not even a second later Ruhn bolted up from the couch and ran towards the kitchen, without a care that he bumped into Azriel as he dashed by. Azriel quietly thanked the Mother that the purple eyed male made it to the kitchen sink before puking inside. Ruhn remained draped over the sink, breathing heavily and occasionally spitting into the basin. Azriel walked over to the male, the awful stench of stale ale, whiskey, and whatever food Ruhn had managed to eat nearly overpowering Azriel’s nostrils. Turning on the tap, Azriel rinsed the vomit down the drain before grabbing and filling a glass of water for the other male. Clearing his throat, Azriel garnered Ruhn’s attention, slightly shaking the glass of water. Ruhn made to reach for the glass, but Azriel withheld it. He needed to hear exactly what the hell happened between them, though he wasn’t entirely sure why he found himself caring so much about a squabble between them.
“What. Did you say. To (Y/N)?” His speech was slow, voice filled with the dark undertone he reserved for his interrogations. He blinked away the surprise, having honestly not intended to use that tone when talking to Ruhn.
“I fucked up.” Ruhn muttered, his voice a bit clearer now that he emptied a good portion of the contents of his stomach.
“Yeah, I’m aware of that much. Question is: How?” Azriel insisted, hauling��the younger male to sit at the small breakfast table on the far side of the kitchen. Ruhn stumbles over, the metal chair from the table squeaking against the tile floor as the male practically drops himself down.
Ruhn leans his head back against the wall, “I called her ‘Lidia.’”
“Lidia?” Azriel sat himself opposite the male across the small breakfast table. The water glass was still in the Illyrian’s hand, holding it just out of reach as incentive for answers.
“Lidia Cervos, also known as ‘the Hind’. She was a female shifter from Midgard.” Ruhn paused, letting out a heavy sigh. “I thought… I don’ fuckin’ know.” He paused again, a wry chuckle escaping him. “I…cared ‘bout her. She died before I could… figure my shit out.” Ruhn chuckles again, but the laughter quickly turns to tears. “Lidia died…just to save me.”
Azriel remained quiet, taking in the information. He could almost see where this was going, but needed the other male to confirm, he’d long learned to never assume anything during an interrogation. Ruhn released a pathetic whine, his head falling to the table, forehead banging hard against the glass surface. Luckily it didn’t break. The younger male’s arms came up to support his head as he continued to rest it on the table.
“Okay, so, you called her by another female’s name,” Azriel tried to brush off the icky feeling saying the words out loud gave him, “I’ve called Rhys Cassian and vice versa. So, it sounds like an honest and innocent mistake. Just a slip of the tongue. Unless-”
“I had her nipple in my mouth.” Ruhn’s voice was muffled by his arms, but the shame in his voice was as clear as the winter night skies of Illyria. Azriel felt the simmering rage turn into a boil and it took everything within him not to lash out.
After a few deep breaths, he was finally able to respond with a simple, “Oh.”
“Her sweet, perky nipple…” Ruhn trailed off, as if lost in the memory. “FUCK! I’m so stupid! How could I…I was thinking about (Y/N)! Her intoxicatin’ scent, the way it takes on a slight tinge of amber when she’s aroused. Fuckin’ Urd, I get so fuckin’ hard jus’ thinkin’ about it!”
“Alright, I don’t need to hear that.” Az shuddered. The last thing he wanted was to imagine the human woman in that state. Naked and moaning, another male’s mouth on her breast. He didn’t want to know, let alone allow himself to imagine what that change in her scent would taste like. The sweet and savory taste of the slickness between her…Azriel caught himself. The thoughts swirling around in his head took him by surprise. He couldn’t deny that the woman was attractive, but he couldn’t afford to have those thoughts. There were other…other things-people- he needed to focus on. Azriel shook his head, hoping the physical action would work to clear the questions forming in his mind about (Y/N). His focus returned to the blubbering male in front of him.
“Why’d I say Lidia? I wasn’ thinkin’ ‘bout her, at least not then,” Ruhn continued, his tears were silent and slow. “I wanted that moment with (Y/N) for years now. I can’t believe I fucked it up. When Lucien-”
“Lucien? What does…” Azriel’s attention perked up at the mention of the Autumn male. “Lucien is mated.”
Ruhn sits up, scoffing at the reminder of Luicen’s relationship status, “Yeah, well his ‘mate’ won’ give ‘m the time of day, let alone even acknowledge the bond.” Ruhn took hold of the glass of water, drinking half of it quickly before continuing. “I may be new ‘round here, and mating bonds seem to be a little different, but I’m not blind. Elain wants nothin’ to do with him.”
“I still don’t see what that has to do with (Y/N)?”
“I thought Lucien… he and (Y/N) would be something more than jus’ friends,” Ruhn explained. “But things changed after tha’ first trip to that other court. Lu kept his distance, and even if he didn’ ask me to help I would have. The past three years we’ve become so close.” He sighed, finishing the water in his glass. Azriel stood and refilled it for him before sitting back across from the male. “I didn’ wanna rush things between us either. She’s been through so much. Last thing on her mind was romance or sex. Then her birthday came; I wanted to make it special for her. I didn’ do it with the hope of anythin’, but…she kissed me an’ I thought, ‘Finally!’” He smiled softly to himself. “I could feel it, she wanted me as much as I wanted her.” Ruhn ran his hand through his mangled hair. “I jus’ had to fuck it up.” He reached for the refilled glass again, Azriel sliding it towards him.
“Did you apologize?” Azriel asked, knowing that even if Ruhn had, the likelihood of her being receptive to that apology in the moment was minimal.
“I tried,” Ruhn sighed, spinning the glass of water in his hands along the smooth glass surface of the table.
Azriel sighed again, his own hand running through his short hair, as he debated on saying anything. His own thoughts surrounding the woman were jumbled. It would be so easy to withhold what he knew about her feelings, her worry for the Midgardian prince. Ruhn deserved to wallow in self pity. Deserved to spend a few more nights away from her. However, Azriel eventually settled on his earlier admission to himself. (Y/N) deserved someone that made her feel safe, and Ruhn made her feel safe, even if they were in the middle of a fight. “She misses you.”
“I miss her,” Ruhn picked up the glass, drinking the contents in a singular gulp, throwing it back like a shot. He paused, setting the glass back down on the table, “Did she really say I made her feel ‘forgotten?’” Azriel could only nod, causing Ruhn to groan, his head returning to rest against his arms on the table.
“I can’t believe I did this. She’s all I think about and…” He trails off. “Her softness. Her body is so soft, yet also firm, strong. Even with all the trainin’ over the years she still has those plush feminine curves.” Ruhn closed his eyes and groaned. “And her skin tasted like… like… fuck, I don’t even know how to describe it. Imagine your-your favorite dessert, the one that’s not overwhelmingly sweet so you savor every bite. You then spend the rest of your life only wanting that flavor, craving it and daydreaming about the next time you’ll get a taste.”
The Shadowsinger shifted his wings, bringing them closer to his body. Even his shadows began to swirl and vibrate as the other male’s description of how the human woman’s nipple tasted made his cock twitch. With a deep breath Azriel willed himself to remain soft.
“Lidia…the shit with Lidia is just a jumble of thread. I wanna ignore it; a loose end with no closure.” Silver tears returned to line purple irises. “I had just found her and…there’s a lot of shit I gotta unpack ‘bout her. I sure as Hel didn’ think I’d find anyone else, but…(Y/N) just had to walk into that fuckin’ dining room. It’s like…the more time I spend with her, the more I get to know her, fuck… she is jus’ what I needed. Straight from my dreams. I felt this way with Lidia and… it’s so fuckin’ hard,” Despite the cracks in his voice, his words became clearer. “I feel guilty, like I shouldn’ wanna even be with anyone else. And ashamed, ashamed that I didn’ grieve the female that was likely-” The prince paused, trying to compose the tears that wouldn’t stop. Azriel hated to admit it, but the young shadow wielder was a damn mess without (Y/N). “I’m falling in love…I’m in love with (Y/N).”
Love. That simple word rattled something deep in Azriel, a wave of nausea swirled in his gut. He shouldn’t have been surprised. It wasn’t as if the Prince’s behaviors didn’t give away his feelings towards the woman. Nevertheless, the Shadowsinger didn’t expect to hear that exact word, that exact confession and the genuine emotion in Ruhn’s voice as he finally expressed the sentiment out loud. Azriel felt the blood rush to his head, his vision tunneling as the nausea built and acidic bile burned his throat. His mind echoed a singular truth: Ruhn is in love with (Y/N). The thought played over and over in his mind on a tortuous loop.
Another thought struck Azriel, why the hell did he even care? Why did he care if any male- Human, Fae, or otherwise-held any feelings or sexual fantasies for (Y/N)? He didn’t. He didn’t care. His body just responded as any sexually frustrated male would upon hearing Ruhn’s desire for her. Azriel reminded himself that he’d had similar thoughts about Elain many times over the past few years. Said fantasies regarding Elain made perfect sense for Azriel to have. Just like it made perfect sense for the male crying in front of him to be in love with the human woman that had slowly crept into all of their lives. But if he didn’t care, why did Ruhn’s spoken confession cause such a visceral reaction? Could it be guilt? Azriel recognized that most of his efforts to make (Y/N) feel comfortable in this world stemmed from the guilt from…that week of torture. That had to be what caused these feelings churning deep inside him. Guilt that he wasn’t the one to make her feel safe and secure after he had been the one to break her in the first place.
It wasn’t anything more than that. It wasn’t anything like what he felt for other females in his life. (Y/N) wasn’t all that unique; sure, she was kind, compassionate, and resilient as hell, but so were Elain and Gwyn, and many of the other Priestesses he’d come to know during the morning training sessions. This feeling in his stomach, and the thoughts now swirling around in his head were all just the result of a guilty conscience and nothing more. Settling on this rationale, the nausea in his stomach subsided, and the rushing of blood in his ears died away, allowing the Spy Master to refocus on the still struggling and drunk male in front of him.
“I really fucked up,” Ruhn held his face in his hands, elbows resting on the glass table. “I don’ think…I can’t…atone for something like this. Fuckin’ Hel���jus’ a piece a shit…makin’ her feel forgotten.” Azriel continued to listen quietly, biting his tongue to keep his agreement of the Midgaridan’s self assessment to himself.
The two fell into an uncomfortable silence. Ruhn’s head now leaning back against the wall of the breakfast nook. Azriel glances between the male and his empty water glass, a few minutes pass by before he stands. Picking up the glass from Ruhn’s limp grip, he refilled it a final time. However, instead of returning to his previous perch, he went over to the opposite side of the kitchen. Pulling out a loaf of bread, he ripped off a sizable chunk to then set down in front of the night haired male. Azriel had to pause for the briefest of moments, the tears in Ruhn’s purple eyes reminding the Shadowsinger of Rhysand after he returned from Amarantha’s grasp.
“Apologize.” Azriel tried to keep his voice soft yet stern. “Don’t just ‘try.’ Make her listen and apologize.”
“Make her listen, huh?” Ruhn chuckled darkly, picking at the chuck of bread. “You interrogated and tortured her for a week, and you now spend hours with her every day. Yet you still don’t know a fuckin’ thing ‘bout her.” Azriel stopped and turned from where he stood in the doorway leading towards the hall. He was about to counter the Prince’s words, but the utterly defeated look on the male’s face gave him pause.
“You’re right,” He loosened a heavy breath. “You know her better than I do. So figure something out. Maybe a grand gesture or something.”
Ruhn began to laugh, “I didn’t peg you as the romantic type Azzie.” Azriel tensed his shoulders at the nickname, mentally brushing it off due to the other male’s drunk status. He looked towards the clock on the wall, dawn was only a couple of hours away now.
“Look,” The spy master ran his fingers through his hair, “Just…just talk to her. If a grand gesture won’t work, then start with a small one. She made a comment about not really knowing you. That sounds like a good place to start.”
“The last female I opened up to was killed,” Ruhn lifted the water glass to his lips, his movements slow, as if the glass held the weight of his heavy words. The sips he took were slow and deliberate. His eyes glazed over as he stared ahead. Azriel sighed again. While he kept most of his thoughts to himself, he also understood the other male’s hesitancy. However, the idiot in front of him created this issue. It wasn’t up to Azriel to fix it nor tell him exactly how to do so. Yet, that is exactly what he found himself doing.
“If I was in your position, trying to regain the trust of someone I was in love with, I’d tell her everything and not hide a single part of who I am.” Azriel stepped closer to the male still sitting at the table. “She’d know of every crime, and every life I’ve taken or irrevocably altered. She’d know about my past and the story behind every single visible and invisible scar. She’d know the reasons behind every sacrifice I’ve made over the last few centuries. Especially regarding the safety of those I love and care for. She would become an integral part of my life, she’d know my loved ones and they would know her.” Azriel didn’t care that Ruhn began to shrink away in shame as he loomed over the younger male; the unintended intimidation of flared wings appeared to be just the thing the “Starborn” Prince needed to understand that any apology to a loved one could not be half assed. “I’d lay my soul bare before her… and if she understood, if she stuck around, and she could feel safe with me then I’d know with complete certainty she would be worth it.”
“And if she couldn’t?” Ruhn questioned. Azriel paused, he knew what answer he would receive from (Y/N) if he truly was in Ruhn’s position; and that would be a very different response than what she would grant the Midgardian Prince.
“Just talk to her Ruhn,” He muttered, wings returning to tuck in close before turning around to exit the kitchen. “She wants to listen.” Ruhn’s midnight hair shifts as he nods, a long contemplative sigh escaping his lungs.
“I’ll talk to her, tell her everything…” he mumbled, placing his head on his arms as they rested on the table top.
“And apologize.” Azriel reminded sternly.
“And apologize,” Ruhn nodded, his voice drifting off as he closed his eyes. Within seconds the younger male was asleep at the table. Azriel didn’t even bother to wake him, perfectly content to let the other male’s muscles cramp from the awkward sleeping position.
Azriel made it to the bottom landing of the staircase before a soft whimper caught his attention. Against his better judgment, he ascended the stairs giving into the pull he felt to check on (Y/N). The door was already slightly ajar, the light from the hall flooding into the darkness of the bedroom. The beam of light streaked across the wooden floorboards, up along the bed. Her lower limbs tangled up in the wine red colored sheets. He instantly knew that the level of dishevelment was the result of her tossing and turning during a nightmare.
His hazel eyes followed along her legs, red sheets fading into the black of her night dress. His gaze continued to travel up, snagging on an unexpected exposure of soft flesh. Azriel’s breath caught in his throat as his eyes drank in the sight of her uncovered breast. He tried to avert his eyes, but they continued to linger, a part of him wanting to know if Ruhn’s description was accurate. His questions were answered as she shifted, and a perky nipple made visible in the light from the hall.
One second Azriel stood frozen in his spot, the next, he was sprinting down the steps and out the front door of the townhouse. The cool air filling his lungs helped him regain his senses long enough to force the organ between his legs to return to a limp state. He glanced back at the townhouse, confusion marking his face. Perhaps he was spending too much time with the human…he shook his head, taking a few steps to exit the gate. It had also been quite some time since he enjoyed the company of a female, perhaps it was time to find that release. As soon as he cleared the gate of the townhouse, Azriel shot into the skies of Velaris, taking his time to process the conflicting and concerning thoughts in his head before returning to the House of Wind.
The sound of glass shattering startled Ruhn awake. Sitting bolt upright, he looked around the darkened room, moonlight filtering through the bay window of the breakfast nook in the kitchen. His heart pounded inside his chest, as he took in the sight of the broken water glass now on the floor. It took a few more moments for him to get his bearings and remember what transpired earlier in the evening. He could still smell the alcohol, and the various scents of what he could only assume were Fae females on his clothes. He needed to change. He needed to clean up this glass first. It took him ten minutes, but he finally located a broom and dustpan and swept up the shards, dumping them in what appeared to resemble a trash can. His vision was still slightly blurred as the headache of what was sure to become a monster of a hangover made an appearance.
Ruhn took a few more minutes for himself at the kitchen sink. Grabbing a new, clean glass, he filled it with water from the tap, taking small sips and deep breaths. Gathering the stamina and the courage to face going upstairs. Bits and pieces of his conversation with Azriel stuck out in his mind. He knew that he had to talk to (Y/N). To apologize again, especially now that the woman had some time to get her own thoughts in order. He also knew that Az and Cass were right. He and (Y/N) wouldn’t get anywhere if he didn’t also open up to her. He supposed that he could start small, let her know some of the positives of his life before telling her about all the fucked up shit.
He finished the glass of water, and slowly made his way upstairs. As he reached the top landing, he heard a faint whimper. He instantly recognized the sound and even in his hazy mind realized that (Y/N) had not taken her tonic tonight. He sighed, a part of his heart breaking that he had allowed himself to fuck around while she suffered. She had already been using the tonic for a full two weeks at this point. One week while with Lucien, and now this past week during their time apart. The Prince closed his eyes, standing outside the bedroom door debating if he should even enter. He heard her sharp movements and that was enough for him to move his feet forward.
Ruhn quietly entered the bedroom, careful as not to wake the woman sleeping in the bed. Their bed, he reminded himself. The one that he missed sharing. He missed her warmth and the softness of her body as he would curl around it. They had slept next to each other for the past few years and he was surprised by how much he missed her. The past week had been one of the worst he endured since he first arrived. Tossing and turning. Panicking when he couldn’t feel her lying next to him. He lost count of how many times he startled awake to find himself in a room separated from her. Cassian had seen the change in his attention, and after a week decided that it would be a good idea to let off some steam by taking him to a place called Rita’s.
He carefully made his way around to his side of the bed. Sat on the edge, he took off his shoes; his pants and shirt quickly followed suit. He didn’t care that (Y/N) would likely be pissed that he joined her in bed before she allowed it. He needed to feel her, to hold her. Especially if she had been too afraid to take the tonic tonight.
He knew that he needed to apologize, he only hoped that she was more willing to listen to him now. He had spent most of the evening trying to figure out exactly what to tell her. Where would he start? Cassian advised to start at the beginning, and Az…well all Ruhn could remember was Azriel telling him to just talk to her. However, which “beginning” would be the best to start off with? Should he tell her about his childhood, his mother, and his dickhead of a Father? Or should he start with telling her more about Midgard and what his life was like before his sister turned it all upside down. Honestly, with the way his head was starting to pound he may as well just flip a coin. Whatever he chose to tell her first didn’t matter. All that matters is that he would be telling her something.
Ruhn lifted the sheet, immediately noticing that her body was curled in on itself, back towards the center of the bed. She only did that when a nightmare was starting to take hold. He laid down next to her, and carefully wrapped his arm around her middle. Her body immediately began to relax. The knowledge made him smile, his own shoulders and upper back releasing their built up tension. He curled the rest of his taller frame around her, perfectly molding himself to her. She stirred, hips twitching as if she was going to turn over. Ruhn moved his hand seeking hers, interlacing their fingers once it was found.
She turned over to face him, and that’s when he heard her soft whimpers. Even though he enveloped her during the early stages of her nightmare, it seemed that whatever had played in her mind had already done its intended damage. He hated watching her cry, especially when he felt so powerless against the forces that brought her to tears each and every time.
He adjusted his limbs to accommodate their new position. One of her legs wiggling its way in between his. His arm wrapped around her back, snaking up her shoulder blades, allowing his fingers to find purchase in her hair. He gently tugged on the roots, reassuring her that he was there. She let out a shaky breath and the smallest whine before pressing her face into his chest.
“It’s okay baby,” He assured, another gentle tug, “I’m here. You’re safe.” She seemed to relax a bit more at his dulcet timber. “Go back to sleep. I’m right here.”
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#acotar x reader#crescent city x reader#azriel x reader#lucien x reader#ruhn x reader#bhinfic#lucien vanserra x reader#lucien vanserra x plus size reader#azriel x you#azriel x plus size reader#azriel x y/n#lucien x you#lucien x y/n#ruhn danaan x you#ruhn danaan x reader#ruhn danaan x plus size reader#ruhn x y/n#ruhn x you
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So speaking of that whole duel with Link—he killed a ton of Rito, right? Why did this never come up again? Were there political ramifications to this?
You'd think that, wouldn't you?
You'd think a soldier of the Hylian royal family maiming and debilitating hundreds of Rito would reflect poorly on the Hylians.
But no. Do you know who got all the blame? Me!
The Village Elder along with the majority of the residents decided that it was all my fault for 'not training my men well enough' and 'sending them wrecklessly into battle against the great hero with the master sword.'
And people wonder why I dispise that twit.
He shows up unnanounced traveling with one of those psycotic little 'guardians' that have been attacking and killing our innocent citizens and expects me not to issue a defensive attack? He knew what he was doing - framing me as some kind of fool.
But of course, innocent little knight boy can do no wrong. It's all Revali's fault that soldiers died. He should be screamed at for half an hour and nearly have his job and rank stripped from him, and should be shunned and glared at by the entire Village for weeks like he's some kind of monster.
Some of those warriors were almost like friends to me, you know. But who cares how I feel about it? I'm just the terrible, selfish cheiftan who sent them to die for no reason. Who attacks the Royal Family's precious little blond lap dog unprovoked.
I nearly got refused the role of Champion from the Village Elder all because of that little blight and his antics. Can you imagine the state that Hyrule would have been in without me? However, I'm the one who should be 'greatful', because if the Elder and the Royal family wasn't merciful enough to let it slide and brush the deaths of my companions under the rug so that I could be named a Champion of my people, then I'd likely have been exicuted or banished or something.
All the while, golden boy gets his head pat for doing such a great job while he's washing the blood of my men from his featherless hands.
#revali#age of calamity#breath of the wild#legends of zelda#tears of the kingdom#link#rito village#rito
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Mary follows, quiet, stops in the doorway and leans against the frame — feeling half-real, somehow, as though there are three of them in the room, as though Mary is the dead one of their little trio. Mary Dahl, forever half-formed, chewing the corner of her thumbnail thoughtfully, eyes wary.
"She used to make me so angry sometimes, you know that?" she says after a moment, driven only by an urge to break into the space somehow. To say, I'm here, to split the silence.
They are grown adults. They are criminals. Playing hide-and-seek in the suburbs to escape the police and God-knows-who-else might be hunting them. But for a small moment Mary is no different than the muzzled and frustrated little girl she had been when she'd known Sylvie.
"She could have been perfect. She could have been everything." Her hands drop, twist together in front of her. Her fingertips fiddle with a delicate bracelet, and the tinkling sound of it feels just a little too loud in the quiet space. "The next Martha Wayne," she adds after a moment, a sarcastic little twist of the mouth.
Every debutante in fake pearls thinks they’re the next Martha Wayne, Mary had told him once, only partly tongue in cheek.
"Throwing all that away, it was—" Mary's head tips sideways a fraction as she tries to decide on the right word, the faintest crease between her brows. She had wanted that perfect life. Sylvie had had it all lined up neatly for her, and walked away. As if none of it really mattered at all.
And a part of Mary knows, shrewdly, that it doesn't matter, but another part — one embedded in her bloodstream, maybe, curled up in the liquid marrow at the centre of her bones — knows just the same that it is everything.
"Anyway." There is no perfect word waiting at the tip of her tongue. She looks at Jervis, with his arms braced at the countertop, and the quiet stretches out again, a singular thread between the two of them. One foot draws an absent half-circle on the floor, slow.
"You think she's flawless because she isn't here to prove you wrong." Mary's tone is not unkind; it hovers somewhere between bluntly casual and something approaching gentle. "You think she's perfect because you need her to be perfect. Otherwise—"
There is no otherwise. She shrugs, like someone who has decided to lose interest.
“True enough.” Jervis’ voice is quiet, almost absent, as he lifts the teacup once more, his gaze fixed on the delicate curve of porcelain. It’s as if he’s hoping to find some answer in the dregs of liquid, something beyond Mary’s words. His fingers trace the rim, slow and methodical; an unconscious movement that speaks to an inner tension he’s not quite willing to acknowledge.
He lets his eyes drift as he stands there, clutching the saucer, the weight of her words settling on his shoulders, pressing him down. Sylvie. Alice. Gotham eats its children. His lips squeeze together in a thin line, and there’s something dark flickering behind his eyes, something that catches there and won’t let go. She wasn’t wrong.
He moves toward the kitchen—his steps soft, measured, like he’s threading himself through invisible tripwires. The hollow silence between him and Mary trails after him like the scent of lilac wafting on the breeze. When he reaches the sink, he hesitates; clutches the teacup a bit too tightly. His fingers flex; tightening around the ceramic, then relaxing, over and over. Finally, with a controlled breath, he tips the cold dregs down the drain. He watches as the last remnants of tea swirl and disappear.
Turning on the faucet, Jervis lets the water run for a second, filling the kitchen with a quiet hum. He rinses the cup carefully, scrubbing along the inside as though trying to erase more than just residue. Soap, a dash more than needed, froths up over the edge and slips between his gloved fingers. He scrubs until his hands are damp, until there’s nothing left but the gleaming, empty porcelain. His shoulders are tense; the muscles knotting and unknotting beneath his clothes. And still, he doesn’t set the cup down.
It’s been three days, seven hours, and 54 minutes since they entered this place together—three days of tangled words, of recollections and reflections that hover like smoke, of the bursts of silence that grow between them and never quite settle. Jervis looks over at Mary, the slightest twitch at the corner of his mouth betraying something unreadable—wistfulness, maybe. Or resignation. But his gaze is distant, somewhere just beyond her, like he’s looking through the layers of memory that tie them together.
Sylvie. Her presence slips into his thoughts like a knife between ribs, sharp and sudden. He can almost see her, standing there with that unreadable expression she often wore—the one that made her seem both impossibly close and frustratingly distant. Analytical, innovative, visionary. He’d loved those traits in her, admired how she could slice through complexities with a single, cutting insight. She was disciplined, relentlessly focused, always looking ten steps ahead. Strategic.
But there was more to her. Beneath that cool exterior, beneath the concentrated logic and sharp critiques, there was something he’d glimpsed that few others ever had—a quiet empathy, a deep well of feeling she guarded fiercely. He had seen it in the way her fingers hesitated before touching his face, in the rare, fleeting moments when her gaze softened and the iron walls came down just enough for him to peer inside. Sylvie’s independence, her tenacity, had drawn him in, but it was her vulnerability—hidden so carefully from the world—that had held him there.
She’d been reserved, even perfectionistic, always skeptical of easy answers. Sometimes he’d felt like she held herself at a distance, even from him. But that was the nature of her mind, wasn’t it? Always turning inward, mapping out possibilities, seeking to optimize everything, including their relationship; just her way of expecting the best from herself—and from him. It was why she could be detached, impersonal at times. He knew she’d never been good at expressing affection openly—she didn’t need to be. He could feel it in the way she looked at him, in the way she listened, dissecting his every word not out of criticism, but because she valued them, valued him. She’d loved him as he was, fragile pieces and all, and she’d pushed him to open parts of himself he hadn’t known were there.
He closes his eyes for a brief second, letting that memory settle, accepting that it’s only a memory now, just another of Gotham’s lost faces. Jervis sets the cup down and looks at Mary again, noticing the faint frown on her face.
Human, she had said. The word tugs at something raw in him. Yes, Sylvie was human—brilliantly, painfully human. Not a martyr, not a saint. Just a person, trying to make sense of a world that often made no sense at all. He wonders if that’s why she’d loved him—because in his madness, in his fractured view of reality, she’d found a reflection of her own discontent, her own unspoken frustrations. They had seen each other without the usual masks, without the defenses. And wasn’t that the real vulnerability? The willingness to be fully seen and still stay, despite it all.
He stands there for a long moment, hands braced against the sink, his thoughts twisting inside him. Jervis’ lips twitch again, as though he might answer Mary’s earlier question, but he doesn’t. Instead, he lets the stillness swell between them. Maybe Sylvie wasn’t so different after all; maybe she, too, had once been hopeful enough to think she could outrun Gotham’s darkness. But all that’s left now is her ghost—still hovering in the air, as real as any of them—and the knowledge that neither of them will ever leave its grasp.
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Monarch: Legacy of Monsters - 1x04
#mlomedit#monarchlegacyofmonstersedit#monarch: legacy of monsters#monarch legacy of monsters#cate randa#may olowe-hewitt#anna sawai#kiersey clemons#monarch legacy of monsters 1x04#cate x may#femslash related stuff#but subtext#so I spent the first half of the ep going oh okay never mind my first post#this is clearly setting up a may/kentaro reunion#but this?? was??? extremely unnecessary?#tbh it doesn't fit with their (current) relationship at all?#I mean I guess cate looking after may might have affected her#and the ''one of us has to make it out of here'' meaning to get word to her sister perhaps#which she so easily told cate about and not kentaro >_>#but like...the framing...I'm not wrong right#the last gif
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Fellas can you take this somewhere else. Maybe. Just not in the fucking halls. Thanks 🫡
I couldn't resist drawing out these tags I wrote on a dif post LMFAO
Moe just has...... SO many problems.......
Close-ups of my fave shots!
The elusive Líf...
#fire emblem#feh#i'm like. split between feeling proud of this and feeling So Over It LMFAOOOOOOO#which is why. lighting could be better. but i don't care enough to put in more work than i already have LMFAOO#LIKE... ONE COOL PART is this could be my first fully colored comic piece w completely original dialogue???#where like. i didn't quit at any point of it. EXCEPT. skimping on the backgrounds. but again. more effort than i'm willing to put in#but i think it still counts bc my only real plan was to have the askr pillars/walls as framing/backdrops#ALSO the characterization... in the panel where lif walks into frame. it's SO fun to me#they both look at lif. but moe is Not subtle about it. looking directly at him. while alfonse side-eyes him.#and the most IMPORTANT detail. is that alfonse and lif are making the same kind of face. like 🤨#there is SO MUCH POTENTIAL. in alfonse and lif sharing facial expressions. in having the same knee-jerk reactions to things.#and it's espppp fun to figure out bc you're only working w half of lif's face. it's all in the eyes/brows and SOMETIMES!#SOMETIMES!!!! it's in the nose! in this illust he is more relaxed/resting so you don't see it here#but i'm TELLING you. adding some scrunch to the nose can add soooo much expression-wise#this took longer than i expected it to. also. which is why i'm so over it LMFAOO#but i do think the extra time was worth it... first run of the last panel was too lighthearted/jokey#capturing some conflict between moe/alfonse was the right choice. in how intensely this starts off (tonally)#AND! in showing how they do butt heads at times. in fact sometimes they clash REALLY badly!!!!#which is actually so huge bc i've wanted to capture this since the beginning. how they're so similar but also so opposite#that a lot of times! they understand each other deeply and cover each other's basis. HOWEVER.....#other times. it's just catastrophic. like it isn't That intense here but you can probably see how it goes horribly wrong.#i am... always thinking about it.... and only occasionally stressing myself out about it LMFAOOO#fe alfonse#fe lif#moe tag#summoner oc#my art#my comics
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HOLY SHIT I HAVE OVER 3K FOLLOWERS
oh hi hello!! the rare bit of talking i do on here!!
i'm not sure how to celebrate! i'm not used to being! Visable!!
Im normally very under-the-radar, so to see i even have fans!!
well its all been very exciting!!
But thank you!! I'm glad to see so many of us
LOVE LOVE LOVE Wally!!
(and also dont mind my random reblogs of other fandoms and aesthetic)
I'm currently prepping art for MUCH later dates!
taking things slowly right now!
but still here, still in love with Wally! as we all are!!
I hope everyone remembers to take care of your
Body and Mind and Soul!
#i hope all of my followers also like liminal pools and fish...#ahh i will admit in the tags#that i feel so slow with art rn!#a burn out i think!#i drew wally CONSTANTLY everyday for more than a year#i love him i do!!#i must have drawn him literally hundreds of times and that doesnt count the hundred frame animations i did#I'm trying to tell myself its ok to draw something else#it feels so wrong to not be drawing him!!#but its healthier to not pour my entire self into one being right??#i know what obsession can lead too#anyways sorry for being ominous in my tags#but thank you everyone!#jazzisaspazz
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finally found a place to read With the Light online and i'm thrilled; if you haven't read this manga i do Legitimately recommend it
#N posts stuff#like don't get it wrong it Is Not a series about being autistic it Is a series about raising an autistic kid#but also don't be put off by that because it's legitimately a series that I feel Loves autistic people with its whole being#it's kind of a teaching manga so it showcases a lot of different opinions/characters/conflicts/etc. but the Framing is very consistent#in that the manga is Extremely of the opinion that autistic people are People who deserve to be Valued and Accepted As They Are#the onus for change is never put on autistic individuals the framing is basically Universal in the 'the World needs to change#to be more accepting' -- it's a very Social Model depiction of autism that ALSO never veers too far into the#'autism isn't even Really a disability' fallacy; it's very much a 'A lot of autistic people will need constant support in a variety of ways#throughout their lives but that isn't the roadblock preventing them from having their own lives; ableism in society is the roadblock'#the first two chapters are the hardest to get through bc they take place before Sachiko has any real understanding of autism and#so she's isolated and stressed out and the ignorance makes it difficult for her to care for Hikaru properly (there's also a lot of#other characters Blaming her for what's going on which goes unchallenged at this point though that changes later); but after she#understands what autism is she's Firmly in Hikaru's corner for the rest of the series - you can skip right to ch 3 without a problem#if you're not interested in reading about that initial conflict#there's still a Lot of conflict ofc but by then the chapters have some of my favorite moments so i don't want to advocate skipping#them; like Hikaru's daycare teacher explaining how Hikaru's difficulty speaking is the same as other kids' troubles with#things like jump-roping/etc.; and then a mother who has An Issue with Hikaru's presence in her daughter's class realizing the#depth of the problematic opinion bc Her mother (who had a stroke) faces similar ableism from her peers#i'm cutting this post off b4 the tags get Too long but if you're curious but still hesitant man. send me an ask and i will Happily#write an insanely long essay about how much i love this series; i have all the books i'm not excited about the online availability#for Me i'm excited bc i've been wanting to rec this manga for like almost a full decade and i can finally give you a link instead of#saying 'well. you can find used copies sometimes' lol
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Hm.
#gotta say i'm not comfortable at all with macklemore's implication#that diasporic jews are by default implicated in the actions of the state of israel#there's nothing wrong with applauding jewish students for taking a stand against egregious human rights violations#it's an excellent application of tikkun olam and i applaud them too#but it does feel like a slap in the face to hear that framed as 'finally cutting ties with' israel#disappointed but not surprised that he couldn't get through one pro-palestine song without including the dual loyalty canard
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correct me if I'm wrong but I was just thinking about the roykeeley in season two of it all, and that fight where Keeley loses it at Roy for being clingy because she can't handle how close they are now that they work in the same building but like,,, Keeley and Roy would have been working in the same building while dating for a good chunk of season one as well.
She started working at Nelson Road before Jamie was even sent back to Manchester. They would of had months working in the same building, so either Roy has always been that clingy and Keeley just didn't mind at first, which I found doubtful given that it only takes her like a week to blow up at him for it in season two, or Roy being clingy is an out of character thing for him to be doing that should've raised some kind of red flag to friends and loved ones that I feel like from what we know about Keeley as a character would've been treated with more empathy than she actually had in the show.
#i'm going off of memory so this might not be anything#but wasn't one of her complaints that he sat quietly in her office reading when they were on break?#girl how is that being clingy and not just regular levels of wanting to spend time with your partner?#I stand by that Roy wasn't in the wrong for that#I actually stand by Roy not being in the wrong for MOST of his relationship with Keeley#I don't even think he was wrong for breaking up with her#I will not ever view breaking off a relationship you aren't happy in as selfish#and I don't care how much the show tries to make me view him as selfish for it or like he threw something good away#no he didn't#just because Keeley was hurt by being broken up with (understandable reaction) does not mean Roy did the wrong thing by breaking up with he#he looked at the way their relationship was going and saw that he wouldn't be happy if he stayed so he left#and the show tried to frame that as a bad thing#“maybe i should've just stuck around and enjoyed it”#no sir that's not how these things work#staying in a failing relationship just because you don't want to be alone isn't healthy you did the right thing#your career and your love life aren't metaphors for each other#and let me be clear Roy and Keeley were 100% a failing relationship right from the start of season 2 with the fight that inspired this post#keeley's feelings about the breakup aren't more valid then Roy's just because she's the hurt party#and they clearly broke up amicably if Keeley is willing to sit down and tell Phoebe about it with him#she wasn't jilted or wronged in any way and the show framing it like that grinds my fucking gears
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Wait wait okay why are we suddenly blaming Gwen for this?
#cricket chirping#total drama liveblog#The framing of what happened earlier suggested that Gwen was in the right for being uncomfortable with what Trent was doing#But now the characters are all going ''Wow it's sooo awful Gwen did that to Trent. Poor Trent. Trent who did nothing wrong. Evil Gwen''#Is this a ''characters are in the wrong'' type deal or did the writing suddenly flip?#Because I'll be honest I've seen more than a few breakup arcs where the girl was in the right to break up with the guy#but then suddenly it flips and the guy was just misunderstood and the girl was evil for dumping him#Hrm. I'm not sure I'm liking this arc
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