#but like. the multiplicity of potential is what appeals to me here

[oswaldthatendswald]

I continue to rotate in my head the question of why Rocinante points his gun at Doflamingo, but does not shoot. The question, to clarify, is about both these actions. Why does he draw his gun; why doesn't he pull the trigger?

It's a really interesting bit of background characterization which is mostly overshadowed by Rocinante's speech and Law's panic. Rocinante draws his gun, and the members of the Donquixote crew react, but are stopped by Doflamingo. That's part of why I'm fascinated : Doflamingo lets Rocinante point a gun at him. Does he expect to be able to avoid a bullet? Does he think (correctly) that Roci won't shoot him?

Rocinante draws the gun, aims it, cocks it, but does not try to pull the trigger. Is it a bluff to make Doflamingo pay attention to him, and avoid any chance he might notice Law? Does he intend to shoot, but decide he's too likely to miss? Does he intend to shoot, and discover he can't bring himself to do it?

[delirious-donna]

The Surprise [Higuruma Hiromi]

an: it’s 2am and here I am posting this smut-filled fic because I can’t sleep and I can’t stop thinking about this man. p.s. requests are open for Higuruma specifically so drop me an ask if you wanna give me some ideas for everyone’s favourite lawyer!

pairing: Higuruma Hiromi x female reader

warnings: lingerie, pussy drunk Hiromi (it’s canon don’t fight me), multiple orgasms, unprotected sex (wrap it folks) and other goodies

Masterlist

“Will that be everything for you today?” The cheery assistant asked offering a genuine smile whilst they rang through your purchases and packed them carefully into a neat little box.

Your stomach fluttered with the thought of what might transpire this coming weekend, a long-planned weekend that couldn’t arrive quick enough. The delicate tissue paper wrapped around the items inside the box before the assistant closed it over, tied a ribbon securely and placed it in a paper bag.

“Yes, that’s it. Thank you for your help earlier, I appreciate it!”

With a bounce in your step and a sizeable dent in your bank balance, you exited the boutique store to daydream about your husband’s reaction to your little splurge. Neither of you were accustomed to dropping large sums of money so randomly, both believing that an air of caution and frugality would see you through any potential storms on the horizon, but you had walked past this store so many times and finally been tempted into their den of sinful delights.

Inclusive-sized mannequins displayed a range of differently styled lingerie, from demure bridal wear to raunchy strips of leather and wide mesh that would leave very little to the imagination. At first, you were convinced it would only be window shopping, however, when you spied an elegant-looking black bodysuit that seemed like it would hold all your bits in without compromising the sex appeal element, it was game over.

Once you were interested, the friendly young assistant swooped in and soon you were trying it on in the fancy dressing room. The lighting was complimenting rather than garishly fluorescent, and the lull of soft, sensual music added to the overall experience, one you were rather enjoying. The strapless bodysuit hugged your curves and accentuated your décolletage nicely. Clearly, it was designed by scientists to support your breasts without cumbersome straps, and you silently praised their ingenuity. Paired with crotchless fishnet tights that you could secure beneath the suit—a suggestion from your enthusiastic little helper—you knew that Hiromi would likely lose his mind and you couldn’t wait.

Your poor, overworked and perpetually exhausted husband had been burning the candle at both ends for the past nearly four months, neck deep in a case that if he were to win would be a monumental victory in his career. In support, you packed him off every morning with a full lunch consisting of his favourite foods, mostly to encourage him to actually eat instead of consuming mug after mug of rancid instant coffee. In your evenings, you helped him go over witness testimonies, read over his arguments for clarity, and did everything you could to lighten his load around the house. It wouldn’t be a permanent arrangement, you both knew that, and to say he appreciated your support was an understatement.

That’s why when he told you that it was all drawing to a conclusion and that he was cautiously optimistic it would end in his favour, you revelled in that knowledge. Whether it did come to fruition or not, his weekend would be free, and he promised to spend some real quality time with you without the cloud of looming work. There was nothing more he could do, no more past cases he could study and the thought of basking in his undivided attention warmed your heart and soul.

With two days remaining before your scheduled weekend plans to do absolutely nothing but relax and unwind in each other’s presence, you again peeked at the box you’d tucked into your side of the wardrobe, away from prying eyes. Maybe it was a bout of nerves, a moment of body consciousness, that made you pull your surprise out to examine the contents. Whatever it was, you worried your bottom lip once the intimate outfit was laid out on the bedspread.

“What was I thinking… this is too much,” you quietly scolded yourself.

Flopping beside the expensive scraps of fabric, you brushed a palm down your face and reminded yourself that you looked fucking divine in the changing room of the boutique, so why would it be any different now? More so, you knew deep in your heart that Hiromi adored you and thought you were a goddess, one he claimed he didn’t deserve.

A few moments later, you stood in front of the mirrored wardrobe to scrutinise your reflection. Your eyes narrowed as you tugged the sweetheart cups into place and felt the soft squish of your breast jiggle inside. Turning to the side, a hand ran the length of your torso with a grin unfurling at the tight hug of the sheer-panelled fabric. Damn, your backside looked real good from this angle. But maybe the fishnets were too much, you mused, turning this way and that.

You ran your fingers through your hair, wondering if you should try to style it, maybe give it some more volume and texture. It was at that moment, whilst making kissy faces at your reflection with your hands scrunching handfuls of your hair and up on your tippy toes to extend the length of your legs, that the bedroom door opened, and you froze like a deer in headlights.

~

Higuruma Hiromi was on cloud nine. Not only had he won a career-defining case against all the odds, but the judge had also taken less time to deliberate than anyone expected they would. After a hearty swig of celebratory champagne drank from crappy paper cups with his partner and their secretaries, he was on the first train home to truly celebrate with the only person that mattered—you.

What he didn’t expect to find when he entered the house as stealthily as he could manage was the vision of you standing in the middle of the bedroom looking like one of the pin-up models from the magazines he would hide under his mattress as a young man.

Like a slightly tipsy house cat, he tiptoed his way through the rooms, listening for signs of you and driving straight towards the bedroom to surprise you with his unannounced return. The door bounced open on its hinges and he stood, shell-shocked for a moment before it turned to white-hot appreciation.

You looked beautiful, stunning, breathtaking even. There weren’t enough colourful adjectives for how he felt about you at any given time, but right now, modelling a black bodysuit that hugged both your butt and your breasts, he was entirely dumbstruck. Hiromi didn’t know where to look, or whether you’d rather he look away given your strangled yelp of surprise at his sudden appearance. You made no effort to cover yourself or shove him out the door, no, you both faced one another as if neither of you knew what to do or say.

His eyes continued to betray him, slowly caressing the length of your figure and finding new things to appreciate; the sweetheart cups, the gauzy panels that allowed him glimpses of your skin beneath, and not to mention the fishnet tights. He hadn’t seen you wear anything like those since your dating years, and he had forgotten how much he missed them, or how many he had ruined by ripping through the gusset in his haste.

“What are you doing home?” You glanced at the alarm clock on the bedside table and back to your husband, heat filling your face but something else followed on the tails of your embarrassment, something more pleasant.

Hiromi ran this thumb over his mouth, gaze pointedly fixed on your chest, and you cleared your throat with emphasis until he finally met your eye and the arch of your eyebrow. Already his neck looked red, like a rash had spread from below the collar of his shirt and travelled towards his jaw. If you could describe a person as having hearts for eyes, it would be one Higuruma Hiromi and you adored him for his open adoration.

“We… I won,” he managed weakly, smiling as if coming out of a daze and you blinked for a moment while processing the words.

“You won?”

He chuckled. “I won.”

A wealth of emotions passed over your face until you ended with ecstatic pride, tears near pricking your eyes as you launched yourself into his arms and peppered his cheeks and nose with enough kisses to make him blush more furiously. His hands settled on your hips, his touch more hesitant than you would expect given the circumstances and you pulled back to give him a questioning look.

“What’s wrong? I thought you’d be more excited than this.”

“Darling…” he started, skimming his fingertips up and down your sides before rounding to your full backside and squeezing as he spoke. “What’s this?”

In your joy, you had forgotten that Hiromi had walked in on you wearing the lingerie that was meant to be for this weekend and meant to be a surprise. You guessed it still had been, although not the one you planned. “Oh, just a little something to show my hardworking man that I love and adore him. Nothing much.”

“Nothing much…” he repeated in a disbelieving whisper. A finger ran the length of your spine, from the top of your backside to near the base of your skull, dragging it slowly and watching you shudder beneath his deliberate touch. Your shoulder blades shifted, pushing your chest out further and into his, which earned you a groan of appreciation.

“I wouldn’t call this nothing much. You look like a wet dream come to life.”

He walked you backwards, the scent of champagne hot on his breath and your stomach curled into a mass of twisted anticipation—heavy in the depths of your belly. Your thighs crashed into the edge of the bed and Hiromi used your moment of imbalance to shove you atop, quickly shucking out of his jacket and crawling over you.

“Hiromi,” you squeaked between peals of laughter. The man in question only hummed in response, his hooded eyes heavy with nothing that spoke of fatigue. The whisky colour of his eyes appeared blown almost completely black by the dilation of his pupils, and he licked over his lips in what looked like anticipation of a hearty meal.

That meal was you…

Any protest you might have offered died in your throat when he claimed your mouth like a man possessed. His tongue curled over your teeth, pushing the memory of champagne into the space he dominated and greedily swallowing your answering moan. His forearms bracketed your head, keeping you caged and unable to run from him, not that you had any desire to, not when you could feel the press of his cock thickening against your lower half.

Loosening the knot of his tie with one finger, you took the moment to grab fistfuls of the shirt at his back, tugging the tails out of his trousers and sliding your palms beneath the starched surface to scratch along his spine. Hiromi shuddered, the disconnect of your lips an audible pop that left a web of saliva between you, only breaking with a quick swipe of your pink tongue.

“I don’t even have my make-up or hair done, you beast!” The half-hearted protest fell on deaf ears, or so you thought when his mouth moved to your neck and down to your collarbone, sucking little blooming lovebites on his journey. When he reached the abundant swell of your breasts, he glanced up whilst his tongue pathed across the top of your left breast, dipping into the valley between and then resuming the path over the right.

“You think I need face paint or styled hair to love you more? Fuck, sweetheart… I nearly came in my briefs the minute I opened the door.” The length of his aquiline nose nudged between your breasts, nuzzling the soft mounds like a cat warming by the fire. Carding your fingers through his hair, you wriggled beneath him and let out a breathy sigh, the weight and conviction of his love settling over you in perfect comfort. There would be no more argument from you, and Hiromi won for the second time that day.

With methodical slowness he kissed his way down your body, stopping to lave the sheer panels at either side of your abdomen and forcing you to arch from the warm sensation of his eager tongue. You’d barely managed to get his shirt off his shoulders before he was exploring you like this was his first time with your body. The white button-up hung down his back, sleeves caught by his elbows, and he made no move to strip it off much to your annoyance.

He stopped abruptly when he reached your pelvic mound, chin resting there whilst his fingers trailed the arch of your foot, up the inside of your calf and tickled behind your knee. “Stop that, mister!” You scolded with laughter threatening to bubble out.

“Spread ‘em and I will,” he challenged with a smirk.

The space between your freshly parted thighs became his home, an arm wound around your hip pawing at the fat of your thigh and the line where it met your arse, eliciting shivers that rippled over your skin like a calm lake disturbed by a skimming stone. He fingered the two snaps that kept the bodysuit in place, stroking firmly over your clothed cunt and pushing the barrier deeper until it started to feel sticky from your arousal. Looking all too smug, he freed the snaps with a grunt of satisfaction, sure that his next step would be to rip through the gusset of your raunchy fishnets so he could taste you. That moment never came.

You felt the vibration shudder through your husband, his head falling forward to obscure what you could see of his face, and you rocked your hips back and forth in invitation. The cool air of the room contrasted by the hot fan of his breath on your slit made you clench around a disappointing nothing, frowning at his sudden pause.

For a long moment, there was only silence. When he looked up, his expression nearly stole your breath. Thick black eyebrows pinched together, visible strain around his drooped eyes and a throaty whine made your pussy flutter with need. This was the Hiromi that only came out to play every now and again. The one who would wring you like a wet dish towel for just one more orgasm, one more mouthful of your hot nectar.

“Crotchless, really?” he murmured, dragging a finger across your puffy folds where the thin membrane of the tights should have resided and you nearly jolted upwards to the ceiling, having forgotten that little fact in the heat of the moment.

Cupping his cheek in your palm, you gave a cheeky wink. “Don’t think I’ve forgotten about all the pairs of tights you’ve ruined over the years. These were just a… precaution.” Hiromi groaned, thrusting his face into your pussy without warning. The flat of his tongue ran the length of you, making you perfectly slippery in mere seconds, only for the tip of the wet muscle to fuck into your entrance immediately.

“Oh, fuck… Hiro!”

You yanked great tufts of his hair to no avail; he was lost to eating you out like a man starved. The prominent slope of his nose slid back and forth across your bundle of nerves, and it lit up your insides like the continuous explosion of miniature firecrackers.

Whining from his sudden onslaught, you tried to run by easing up the bed, but your attempts were shot down in flames by sharp insistent tugs of your hips. Hiromi was enthusiastic at the best of times when it came to going down on you, but it was nothing compared to right now. The wet squelching sucks of his lips and tongue flooded the bedroom, only being accompanied by your decadent moans and panting breaths as you tried not to lose your sanity entirely.

Hiromi was lost in you; the scent of your favourite body wash, the taste of your arousal when it trickled from your core mixed with the slight salt of your skin, the plush silk of your thighs beneath his prodding fingertips and the unrestrained noises that caressed his ears.

He almost missed your orgasm so clouded was his mind in the quest to turn you into a puddle of liquid goo for only his consumption. The wave of it crested through the length of your body, vibrating every limb and twitching each nerve ending. Your spine arched from the unmade sheets, the hand coiled tight in Hiromi’s hair spasming and tugging without even meaning to and that’s when he noticed. Without missing a beat, he wrapped his lips around your pulsing clit and sucked it deeper into his mouth.

Stars winked into your vision at being thrust from one orgasm directly into another so violently. Your pussy fluttered ceaselessly, a craving deep in your gut to be filled at all costs, yet right now all you could do was hold on for dear life whilst you bucked and rutted against your husband’s face, wetting it thoroughly. He nosed at your quaking thigh, sharp incisors nipping your yielding flesh until you yelped and tried to close your legs without success.

You became aware of movement, the absence of shoulders beneath your thighs and you blinked to find a desperate predator stripping off his clothes whilst prowling back and forth at the foot of the bed. Hiromi grasped his cock, tugging it down to the base to spread the leaked precum that continued to dribble from his cockhead. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he had already cum, but he was always the excitable type who would leak and leak until you did something about it, usually opting to take him down your throat until he convulsed and spilt everything he had to offer.

Your hand trailed lower down your body, fingers playing in the spit-soaked mess he’d left behind in his hurry to stand and strip. Hiromi whined; head cocked to the side as he watched you play idly with your puffy lips flooded with the surge of blood and circling your pert little pearl. He fucked his fist harder, the other hand rolling his heavy balls until his stomach sucked in and your nostrils flared in warning.

“C’mere mister lawyer, I don’t want you wasting your orgasm when it could be filling me nicely.”

How quickly the tables could turn. One minute he was the predator, pawing and demanding, taking what he wanted without question, and the next he was the prey. Trapped on his back with cheeks a ruddy hue and eyes that begged for clemency. Your much small hand encased his dick, twisting your palm on each upward stroke while you straddled him and rocked yourself against the balls he’d just been palming.

His hands shook with restraint as they reached for your breasts, filling his broad palms and massaging them until you dipped low to claim his lips. You could taste yourself on his tongue, in his mouth and the sensation empowered you, fucking his throbbing cock through your folds until he twitched and whimpered some more.

“Please… fuck. Need to be inside. Might not last. God, you’re so fucking sexy. Don’t deserve you.” Hiromi babbled every syllable, sounding drunk when there was little to no alcohol left in his system.

His fingertips dipped inside the cups of your bodysuit, tweaking at your nipples and you indulged his silent request by allowing him to fold the cups down and let the spill of your tits fill his face. With renewed vigour and enthusiasm, he mouthed at you and ran his tongue in circles around your nipples one at a time.

You keened at the familiar sensation, swept away by a current of pure indulgence when he moved to suckle you. It was the perfect moment to strike, with Hiromi distracted in flicking his tongue over and over, round and round your swollen bud, you guided him to notch at your entrance and slowly sank onto his needy dick. He grunted; his grip tightening on your waist, but he refused to come up for air, continuing to nudge his nose into your breast, lips pulling the nipple taut until he finally released with a gasp.

“Fuck, I love you. I love you more than I can express.”

Hiromi worshipped you with his gaze, eyes full of devotion and unbridled passion whilst you rode him steadily. The sticky pap pap pap of your pelvis meeting his was the soundtrack to your lovemaking, because beneath the sexy lingerie and the ideas you had planned for the weekend, that’s what this was and always would be. You knew he didn’t need the extra faff to love you with his whole heart. You knew that he was aroused by you simply walking through the kitchen in a pair of his boxers.

You knew he loved you for you.

His dappled cheeks darkened further, the furrow of his brow telling of how he was trying to stave off his release, but you wanted him as undone as you had been, and you would not be denied. Leaning forward, your palms found purchase on his shoulders, breasts bouncing freely in time with your hips, and you squeezed around his shaft until the vein in his temple popped and he let out a guttural groan.

Hiromi grabbed around your middle, flipping you up and over so that he could thrust himself into overstimulation without hindrance. Pressing your thighs to your chest, you heard the telltale rip and knew that another pair of tights had fallen victim to Higuruma Hiromi despite your best efforts to keep them safe. His swollen cock pumped thick spurts of his milky cum against your cervix, filling you to the brim yet continuing to sloppily thrust in and out.

“-cum again… gotta—fuckkk. You’re so tight,” he bit through the words, fighting the steady burn of overstimulation to see you orgasm for the third time and you were close. A glob of spit landed against your clit, thick fingers shaking from exertion rubbing the frothy mess into you with insistent motions. He was a man possessed, falling apart for him was as easy as drawing breath and he caught you on your free fall.

You chanted his name in some semblance of a prayer, thrashing and clawing at anything you could reach until you milked him again and he lost the ability to hold himself up. Hiromi fell atop you, his face pressed into the juncture between your neck and shoulder, hot shuddering moans stifled by his mouth on your neck while he weakly tried to bear some of his weight onto an arm.

“Stop squirming, you’re not that heavy, Hiro,” you teased with a light slap against his back.

Once you could both speak without sounding winded, you combed your fingers through his sweat-dampened hair, moving the strands that stuck to his forehead away until you could trace his eyebrows, his jaw, and the bridge of his nose. “Y’know… you ripped my tights—again.”

Hiromi chuckled, rubbing his cheek against your chest. “I did, and I’d do it again. Maybe give them a miss if we do this again, hm?”

“You liked the surprise then?”

“I already told you that I did, not that I needed it. All I ever need is you.”

It was your turn to chuckle, booping the tip of his nose. “Maybe when I show you the receipt, you’ll change your tune.”

“… sweetheart. How much did it cost? Don’t roll away, missy! Answer my question. Hey. Hey! You have to answer the lawyer when they ask a question.”

[hels-a-noon-june]

Welcome to Hels-A-Noon June!!

The Concept

SO. What is Hels A-Noon June? Simple. It's a 30 day drawing challenge encouraging fans of Hermitcraft and Modded Crew to conceptualize and design their own Helsians!! It's a dying art and I wanted to revive it!!

The Rules

All fanwork is allowed! Fanfics about your Helsmits, fanart of them, concept artwork, etc etc... I just wanna see the Helsmits of the fandom!!!

Tag your posts as #helsanoon, I'll try my best to reblog as much art as I see

You DO NOT have to draw a new drawing every day, you are 100% allowed to prep your drawings and queue them for the month! You're also allowed to skip days if you don't have any ideas. This isn't meant to be stifling or anything. If you have a Hermit or Friend you want to draw a Hels for, draw them first and queue it up!! This is literally just to encourage fun and edgy designs based on the Cubitos!!

The rules aren't super strict, you don't really have to do them in order, heck, you don't even have to do them in June. This is a super loose, fun thing.

If I miss any posts, I'll add them to a bit ol queue

What the Heck is a Hels!?

So for those of you who don't actually know what the heck I'm talking about!! A Helsmit, or a Helsian as I like calling them, is just. The Hels counterpart of a Hermit. The only canon Helsmit is Helsknight, we don't actually know if others exist! But that hasn't stopped anyone!!!

There are 2 ways fans typically go about designing Helsmits.

One approach to making a Helsmit by simply making the opposite of the respective Hermit. This is a pretty common method and I can totally see the appeal. It IS a Mirror Dimension after all

The other approach to making a Helsmit is by taking a trait, whether positive or negative, and twisting it until it's something bad. You're making an evil little guy here.

Who's Running this Blog?

This blog is currently being run by @galaxygermdraws! Local Hels enthusiast (Me n one of my friends have 40+ Helsians). I use he/they/it and I will actively be participating myself!

Other things explained below

Why are there Non-Hermits in this prompt list?

Simple answer, because I think it's cool! Back when Skizz wasn't a Hermit, I was potentially the first person to create a Hels version of him! I also made it a point to make a Hels Scott and a Hels Jimmy. Nowadays, it's not uncommon to see Hels versions of Life Series folks! Heck, one of the more popular Hels fics has a very relevant Hels Jimmy!!

Can I Draw Fanart of Other People's Helsmits?

ABSOLUTELY!!! As long as you tag who you're drawing fanart for, it's free game. No passing off a Helsmit that isn't yours as your own, though!! That's stealing!! And that's bad! I know we're celebrating evil clones here but we don't do that!

But yes, you're allowed to draw fanart for other Hels, I know of a Hels Tango that I bet multiple people would want to draw

Why Are You Even Doing This?

I'm doing this literally just because I want an excuse to make references for my Helsmits, design some new ones, and I just want to see Helsblr revived from the dead. I won't even lie I was inspired by Hermit-A-Day May to do this, and I only chose the month of June because it's Helsknight's birth month!

Having said ALL OF THIS!! I hope you have a fun Hels-A-Noon June. I bet a lot of you guys just got done doing Hermit-A-Day May, and you're insane for that. But if ya feel like doing any of this? I hope you enjoy it

[edwin-paynes-bowtie]

Did it ever occur to you that just because you want to ship Edwin with CK doesn’t mean he consented to anything TCK was doing? Edwin asked him to take the bracelet off multiple times because it wasn’t safe for him to stay in Port Townsend. He even told the cat king that the bracelet was their only bond. Implying Edwin was in any way “asking for it” or flirting back with him is really gross. Edwin realized he was gay. But being gay doesn’t mean he likes every boy he sees (which obviously upset Simon too, but that’s a different story).

I... what

You've caught me on a bad night while I'm sick so here we go!

Okay first of all ?? I'm a Payneland shipper who thinks Catwin has interesting story potential??? I would not want them to be endgame???

(Also yeah I like catwin and want to read/write fic about them. Fucking sue me)

But that's not the point??

Second of all no one said he was ""asking for it"". That WOULD be disgusting but oh my God I haven't even met a CATWIN SHIPPER who thinks that the bracelet thing was good beyond being PART OF AN INTERESTING STORY. Literally 0 people in this fandom have insinuated that he's ""asking for it"" you're insane.

Third of all TCK's appeal is that he is a literal fucking cat. He behaves like a CAT.

Fourth of all yeah he's not looking to get dicked down by every guy he sees yeah but also. If Edwin isn't attracted to TCK then pray tell what the hell is happening here

Fourth of all don't imply that I don't care about Edwin's being happy because anyone who I've ACTUALLY spoken to in this fandom knows that's my top fucking priority here. There are literally FIVE characters I feel THIS fucking attached to and I consume A LOT OF MEDIA and love A LOT OF CHARACTERS. I would take a bullet for Edwin Payne so shut up.

Please leave me and other people who actually ship Catwin alone. One of the best things about this fandom is the lack of ship wars. Don't make it ugly.

[madschiavelique]

hii my love! would u mind doing a little blurb on miguel finding out the woman he has been seeing is a stripper? she just feels so embarrassed to admit that and scared It would drive him away but instead he’s pretty much more open about it and become far too protective too. thank you:))

OMG ANON YOU DON'T KNOW HOW OUR BRAINS CONNECTED because listen : i have an au in mind where my spiderpersona is a succub in a strip club, and basically when Miguel is brought there by his friends, they meet

SO YEA i'm living for stripper!reader x miguel (also this was supposed to be a blurb but i got carried away fdkzefrgd - the club scene from Closer really inspired me for this)... now i want to make a multiple chapter fic on stripper!reader x miguel hELP

summary : miguel discovers you're a stripper

content warnings : NSFW, stripper!reader, reader gives a little private show to miguel (just removes the top though, doesn't reveal the cunt), fem!reader, no use of Y/N word count : 2k song mentionned : world outside - the devlins

tag list : @fandom-ash

Up until now, you had decided to keep your professional occupation to Miguel, for one simple reason: fear.

Fear filled your stomach at the thought of telling him you were a stripper. You and Miguel had been dating for some time, and had quickly become close. The bond was shaping up to be strong, and you were worried that the information about your job would ruin everything.

He'd already asked you a few times what you were doing, but you'd always managed to deflect the subject elegantly. Yet there's no stopping Miguel's determination and curiosity, least of all when the topic of conversation turns out to be you.

So he did something he wasn't particularly proud of, but couldn't resist: while you were out working, he asked Lyla where you were.

She'd given him an address, and some information about it...

"A club?" he'd asked, looking at the street information for the address. "A strip club," Lyla had corrected. "There's no mistake? Are you sure?" he'd questioned, taking a closer look at the establishment's hours and information. "Have you ever seen me calculate a lot of errors?" sighed the artificial intelligence.

Never. Hardly ever had he seen her fail in this area. Maybe you weren't really a dancer there, maybe you were a bartender, or a waitress, who knows. Only, the idea of seeing you wearing a fine outfit and swaying on a stage was strangely appealing to him.

Without missing a beat, he made his way to the address. It wasn't far, which surprised him as much as it reassured him. The very idea that your place of work wasn't far from home appealed to him, as it ensured that if you ever needed to be picked up for any reason, he'd be there.

He arrived at the entrance, breathing in, passed the bouncers who joked that with his build he could get into the business, and entered.

Blue light from two corner spotlights illuminated red velvet-covered staircases leading downwards. He moved forward, the mirrored walls reflecting him. The room's bass could already be heard from outside, but now he could hear the music more clearly.

You light up my dreams, light up my skin. You're so far away, you're holding it in.

The place was quite crowded, and Miguel noticed a fair number of men in suits and ties. He wouldn't have cared in any other context about the consumption habits of these men here, but suddenly the very idea that there were potentially regulars coming to see you displeased him enormously.

As for the place, it smelled of violets and lemongrass. The ceiling was high, revealing a second floor from which hung three chandeliers surrounded by red cubes.

Spotlights were placed here and there, illuminating the important places: the round tables, like the one next to Miguel on which two women on their knees were swaying, undressing each other under the watchful eyes of all the men around the table; the U-shaped bar, from either end of which women were dancing in wisps of sinuous white smoke; and pole-dancing pedestals on their red-lit floor that emphasized the curves of the dancers placed on them.

And he recognized one of the dancers: it was you.

It was an evening like any other, your garter belt was already generously stuffed with bills of various colors against your thigh and you'd already put on a private show. You were on the pole bar, dancing and undulating your body against it under the round, adoring eyes of your little audience.

You'd been in the business for a while now, and you'd managed to make more friends than enemies in the club, enough so that your colleagues became your buddies.

In fact, your friend right next to you softly called your name, and you turned to her as you danced.

"Did you see the one that just came in? He's huge," she pointed out, smiling at the customers around you. "And pretty good looking too."

As you continued your endless choreography, you glanced surreptitiously at the said customer. But your heart dropped into your stomach for a moment as you met Miguel's gaze.

You hesitated between freezing on the spot and running away, but instead tried to keep your cool and your professionalism and continue your dance until he arrived near the pedestal.

"This one," you pointed out to your friend, "is for me."

She gave a little laugh as you motioned for another dancer to take your place and gracefully stepped off your pedestal, advancing towards Miguel as you would a normal customer

"So this was where you were hiding?" asked Miguel a little above the music, tilting his head to the side as he looked you up and down.

"What are you doing here?" you asked, as inquisitive as you were nervous.

"Curiosity got the better of me, and I was right to give in to temptation."

He was watching your outfit, which emphasized your body, your curves highlighted by the glitter and rhinestones mixed with the laces. You were close to him, almost to the point where a simple movement on Miguel's part would allow your two bodies to meet.

"But I'd prefer to discuss this somewhere else...?" he says.

"I'm in the middle of working hours, but... how about a private show?" you offered, drawing even closer to him as your eyes seemed to him irresistible through your lashes.

He shuddered.

"I'd like that."

You smiled softly, taking his hand to guide him towards one of the Paradise Suites. You guided him a little further until you came to a door you knew well and opened it to let him in.

A round sofa circled a round table at its center, the latter illuminated in pink. A strip of light circled the sofa, another path laid out to encourage strippers to be creative and use the room as they saw fit. You weren't expecting to give Miguel a private show tonight, but fate had played a nice trick on you.

You guided him to the sofa, letting him settle there as you climbed up on the table, looking at him with eyes that were usually calculated to convey desire, but this time really felt it.

And he looked at you with, his were dark, pools of ink attentive to your every move.

"How long have you been doing this?" he'd ask, his attention unwavering.

"Five months," you toyed lightly with one of your shoulder straps as you let your other hand roam your body.

He was going to be able to ask you all the questions that came to mind, only if he didn't get too distracted by your beauty.

"Are you allowed to flirt?" he asked.

"Yes, I am." you replied, letting your hand slide down your chest.

"Do you have any regulars?" he leaned forward, his head tilted back to watch you dance.

"Yes, I do. Private clients as well." you turned, your back to him to loosen your corset behind your waist, undulating your body.

The idea that you had regular clients here wasn't disturbing, but the fact that you had private ones displeased him a little more, for the fact that your security was much less framed than it was here.

"I want names."

You let out a small laugh as you turned to face him again.

"You want to make me lose my job?" you knelt on the round table to get to his level.

"No, I want to replace them." he said, his eyes moving from yours to your fingers removing the first strap.

"I'm not allowed to have relationships outside of the club with clients," you countered, tracing the skin of your bare thigh sensually.

"And what do you usually do?" his chest puffed out as he inhaled, feeling a little hotter little by little.

"I dance, I talk, I laugh, I strip, and that is all." you confirmed as you removed the second strap, and with a simple movement unhooked the little clip between your breasts to reveal them.

His eyes were eager, watching your perfect breasts as he parted his lips, mouth agape.

"No touching?" he questioned, eyes still on your body.

"No touching, you can just slide the tips in the garter belt" you advised, your hand sliding against the latter where a few bills were lodged.

"What would happen if I touched you now?" he asked, moving a little closer to the edge of the sofa.

"I would like it," you said, shifting your legs over the front to stand up again on the table gently, "but the security cameras would notice, and probably get you out of here."

Miguel looked up, just above the table, on the ceiling, was a small half globe with a small point of red light.

"Pays well?

"Very well." you smiled, your hands playing dangerously with the string of your thong.

"How much will it cost me to be here with you?"

Miguel wasn't afraid of going broke here, especially for you, he was plenty rich enough for that.

"Depends on what you want." thinking that maybe Miguel didn't want to make you work right now, you got off the table and climbed onto the sofa and then its edge instead, sitting there.

"How high are the prices? I haven't seen the menu of services."

"Our VIP options can go up to 1500 dollars." you say wearily, pretending to walk your index and middle fingers in his direction on the strip of light.

"1500?" he almost exclaimed, raising his eyebrows.

"Mhm," you hummed, "two hours with two dancers and a bottle of Don Perignon."

He turned towards you, coming closer, his head level with your thigh as his eyes inevitably fell on the bills you'd been given.

"And what's the price if I only want you and nothing else with me?" he questioned as his gaze returned to yours.

"Here, from 80 dollars I can give you a 10-minute air dance." you said as you leaned towards him, your faces close but not yet touching. "Outside, nothing."

A small, proud smile appeared on his lips. However, you being far too hot and gorgeous, he was beginning to feel tight in his clothes, especially his pants.

"What time do you get off?" he asked, sitting up differently, your eyes falling on his crotch and smiling as you bit your lip.

"Five o'clock. Will you last until then?"

He sighed, his eyes falling on your lips, eager.

"I just don't know if I'll be able to keep my hands to myself."

You smiled, then straightened up, reaching for your top. But Miguel took his wallet out of his pocket and slipped a bill under your garter belt. To be deprived of a view like this? Never. You smile a little more, and sit back down on the table, kneeling upright to let him get a good look at you.

He leaned towards you again, intertwining his fingers as his gaze softened slightly.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

You sighed, biting your cheek as you looked down at your hands carefully placed in your lap.

"I was scared," you admitted with a sigh. "Scared that this would end what we have."

You knew that not all men or simply partners were comfortable with their halves being strippers, and the idea that Miguel shared that opinion terrified you.

"Nena," he called your nickname.

Your head was still down, and you felt the soft sensation of money paper under your chin. Miguel straightened your jaw with a bill, bringing his eyes to yours.

"This isn't a problem to me." he smiled, lowering his hand to place the bill under the elastic of your belt. "This is actually really good."

Confusion seized you along with relief, causing you to frown while sporting a grin.

"Why?"

He tilted his head to one side, smiling proudly.

"I get the satisfaction for everyone to see how gorgeous you are, while being the only one who has the right to touch you."

You let out a small burst of voice somewhere between a laugh and a sigh, the relief of his answer washing over you like a wave of comfort.

After that, he'd deserved more than just a show.

[arceespinkgun]

ooo can you explain what you mean by kup & hot rod being the id & ego to arcees superego?

Sure, I loved the three of them! Keep in-mind this is kinda excepting Arcee's two pretty horrible introduction stories (well, this reading still works with her actual behavior and personality in them and how that could have developed, but the narrative framing which sucks doesn't necessarily. Furman's treatment of Arcee reminds me of people who claim to be "colorblind" about race and claim we should all ignore it, but then ignore all systemic inequalities that exist in reality... his work reminds me of that but specifically about womanhood). This post is also going to contain major spoilers.

In the arc Time Wars, Arcee is out scouting the Decepticons who are going to drain energy from the Earth. She's wondering where the others are and would rather not fight all the Decepticons herself, but she will if she has to. Kup lets Rodimus Prime know about what she's found out and is incensed that he isn't doing anything about it, but Rodimus doesn't want to thwart it because he knows all of space-time is falling apart. But because of Daniel and Spike, eventually Rodimus relents and sends Kup with a squad to go help her. Arcee is connected to Earth's continued safety (makes sense since she was made there) and a higher sort of morality. Ultimately it's Rodimus that has to be appealed to here since he's the Autobots' leader.

In the Aspects of Evil arc, Galvatron tries to goad Rodimus into killing him in order to turn the Matrix back to the side of evil (this is connected to plot points that occurred with it previously, the Matrix being corrupted somehow happens multiple times in this continuity). Arcee is like, can't you see what Galvatron is trying to do? While Kup is like, who cares, Rodimus should go ahead and kill that monster already!

Ultimately, Arcee gets through to Rodimus.

In issue #252, Arcee gets Kup to calm down while they're look for a saboteur, and note that she initially assumes it has to be a Decepticon who sabotaged the ship, not an Autobot:

However, when it turns out it's Rodimus himself who was trying to kill everyone, since Unicron has indeed ended up taking over the Matrix and Rodimus's body, Arcee doesn't want to stand for Kup's emotional stalling while people get destroyed around them.

Kup is so attached to Rodimus, he doesn't want to potentially kill him, but Arcee is actually correct for questioning this. Because Kup's decisions to try and save Rodimus ends up preserving Unicron's existence in the end.

I would love to see these three characters as a trio again, they lend themselves to so many interesting scenarios, and actually appealing to higher morals regardless of if it comes at personal expense and sounds overly compassionate or may even sound a little brutal is one of my favorite aspects of Arcee. She has a somewhat unique perspective on a lot of situations. When it comes to her being part of the team with Rodimus and Kup, it's also an interesting dynamic since she's a lot younger than they are, wasn't built on Cybertron, and Rodimus and Kup have such an established bond.

[cheshirecherry]

Harry Styles has become synonymous with ‟sexiest man alive” and ‟world's sexiest man” simply by existing but at what cost?

DISCLAIMER: I own no pictures, articles, videos, excerpts used citations will follow nor am I affiliated with H / my take

Here I will take you down memory lane magnifying Harry's image from the start of X Factor circa 2010 to present day; with a fine eye pertaining to his sex appeal and womanizer narrative depicted in the limelight and mass media. As boyband 1D began to rise to fame the general public became fixated on Harry's sexual attributes.

Harry Styles appears to be the whole package. He has talent, wit, humor, a sensitive heart and looks but the harsh reality of living in a superficial world is: physical appearances are favored over substance. In result conventionally attractive people like Harry fall subject to heavy sexualization. Harry's professional music career started in 2010 as did the narrative.

2010

April 11th Harry auditions for the X Factor at the age of 16 years old

Harry is selected to be in a 5-part boyband 3 months later in July (birth of 1D)

Sep 26th Harry stars in a X Factor clip that aired with Katie a potential love interest and multiple other female contestants simultaneously

I'M JUST A TEENAGE DIRTBAG BABYYYYY Harry is portrayed to be a manwhore/player multiple women are at his disposal but he gets caught in the end; Harry doesn't pick any of them and male contestant Wagner sweeps him off his feet

Oct 7th The gold thong incident

Harry is exploited in a magazine as a minor (this makes me so angry and sick) and then asked about it in a interview see video Harry is labeled as an exhibitionist which implies Harry likes to arouse the others in the house with his nudeness or derive attention from his habit of being naked Typical child audiences don't know what an exhibitionist is This is a clear indication for adult attention and later grooming

Oct 20th Harry headlines in The Mirror for the first time featuring singer Cher Lloyd and their blossoming friendship

This article is harmless in nature but helps promote Harry and female companionship on X Factor

Oct 21st 1D video diary week 2

Harry's role in 1D is the flirt at this time this is a given and understood (flirts are promiscuous and highly charming)

Oct 31st The Mirror claims Harry denies dating rumors with Cher Lloyd and insists Harry is interested in singer Frankie Sanford

cited: ‟Cher's not really my type. She's a great girl. We've become good friends but that's it.”

A follow up from the first article and the introduction of Harry and love interests in the media (Harry is referred to as a heartthrob - his appearance is emphasized; his sex appeal is apparent) Harry is picked as receiving the most attention within the band and LT of 1D teases Harry about his crush on Frankie Sanford see video (19:27)

Nov 2nd Harry shows some skin on his bunk bed

The boy likes to be nude again why exploit a minor what's the motive?

The boys talk about Harry's nudity

More excessive showing of Harry and nudeness

Nov 11th Harry confesses his worst habit

Getting naked is his favorite (fansite dedication post)

Nov 13th The Mirror uses descriptive language to depict Harry seducing a mystery girl in Simon Cowell's dressing room (STEAMY!?)

Sources state he was caught after kissing-and-telling

Nov 22nd Daily Mail stirs up Harry and Cher rumors with pictures

This is a common tactic in the music industry; articles will be released with a storyline and pictures will be "leaked" or be released to sway the publics opinion regardless of what was previously reported and it successfully added more fuel to keep the fire burning (attention on Harry)

Just in a span of a few months Harry was a subject of news revolving around his looks and women not his singing! That's normal though right?

Dec 7th The Mirror spew more bs 21 year old Peaches Geldof shows interest in little Harry

Harry shows no interest back

Dec 13th The Telegraph makes Harry the center of attention after a supposed naughty lip read to X Factor's winner Matt Cardle

I find it extremely odd Matt won a TV SHOW but Harry was the center of attention for something inaudible and sexual see video

Ask oneself why and how Harry was relevant in the tabloids after losing X Factor

2011

Jan 30th Anorak News talks 1D X Factor lost and groupies

Harry is referred to as a womanizer at the age of 16 years old prior to his 17th birthday (this breaks my heart completely)

April 11th Sugarscape continues the topic of Harry's nudity streak on X Factor and inquires about UAN tour

Pay attention to how it is a common topic for him; more sexual attention is now on Harry

July 29th 1D appears on Chatty Man for the first time and Harry explains comment made to Matt Cradle

Harry confesses it was completely innocent as he was talking about cats; nobody believes him although it got him grounded for a week (his age is really showing here)

Alan Carr inquires about the girls starring in WMYB

Harry replies twice "the girls were lovely in the video" see video (9:05) Alan Carr pokes at Harry about one of the girls Madison

Alan Carr inquires about Harry stripping on a plane

LP of 1D chimes in and Harry laughs it off as Alan playfully gestures himself opening an imaginary cover to show his body off (this made me uncomfortable; Alan insinuates Harry wants to show his genitals to others unprovoked) see video (6:23)

Sep 19th Yahoo reignites Harry and Frankie Sanford rumors

Clickbait

Sep 27th Capital FM ignites Harry and Adele rumors

More clickbait

Incoming Caroline Flack spam *she is now deceased

Oct 24th Daily Mail claims Harry kisses 32 year old X Factor host Caroline Flack

Grooming has begun and future potential love interests will now be milked in every media outlet from this time forward

Nov 4th RTE reports Flack claiming she regretted kissing Harry

Follow up article

Nov 7th Digitial Spy reports joke gone wrong by comedian David Williams

cited: ‟I'd like to suck his c*ck.”

Male sexual attention is prevalent; solidifying Harry's sex appeal to all audiences

Nov 17th The Mirror continues hinting at Flack and Harry

The phrase stop feeling weird to describe the distaste the world had of their arrangement is laughable

Nov 21st The Mirror gets an answer from H

cited: ‟A lot of people write things on the internet and a lot of the time they don't think about what they are writing or how it's going to affect people.”

‟It's a shame people say that. We are close friends.”

‟We are friends. We hang out sometimes but that's about it for now.”

Around this time Flack received death threats for her association with Harry

Nov 22nd Sugarscape inquires about living arrangements between Flack and Harry

Anne Twist; mother of Harry notifies him of the current rumor

Digital Spy reports X Factor contestant Amelia Lily and Harry getting acquainted

Lily refused to speak on their situation due to fear of backlash

Nov 25th Harry talks virginity with Glamour

Why is a teenage boys sex life NEWS?

Nov 29th The Mirror reports tweet from music exec Sarita Borge

Harry has a dinner date with Borge "Weeeeey, just got a visit from the young ledge that is @Harry_Styles. Ain’t he pretty?" original twitter @SaritaBorge cannot be viewed in present day

Tweets around this time can be found on various accounts about Harry and his lifestyle; he is referred to as a man hoe

Dec 7th Digital Spy reports one night with Flack

Harry was spotted going to her home and leaving; great timing paparazzi!

Dec 8th Capital FM interviews 1D at their first Jingle Bell Ball and questions nudity amongst the band's first meetings

Everyone's full undivided attention is on H Harry speaks on skinny dipping at the bungalow see video (40:14)

Dec 10th IBT reports Flack preparing for the holidays with Harry

It cannot be confirmed Flack met family but was followed by Anne Twist; the mother of Harry on Twitter

Dec 11th The Mirror stir up rumors with disapproval from X Factor bosses and Anne

Very interesting

Dec 22nd Daily Mail reports Flack dropping Harry off at a venue for the start of the UK leg

Teenager Harry is referred to as Flack's boyfriend; citations are included for opposing and pro viewpoints (Daily Mail takes a unbiased and neutral stance)

Dec 23rd Daily Mail suggests Flack is a FWB

Harry explicitly states he’s single

2012

Jan 3rd Metro reports Harry NYE fun

LT of 1D and H host a party together at their home This article is a sympathy pull for Flack Metro claims Harry was crying over Flack as he has fallen for her hard (the source: trust me bro)

Jan 24th Daily Mail reports Jody Flack; sister of Caroline Flack dropping Harry off at a train station

This article is propaganda to persuade the masses H was close with the Flack family

Jan 26th Harry tweets about Flack

H gets personal online

Jan 27th The Mirror reports Flack and Harry split

The timing is astonishing; Harry's 18th birthday and the USA leg is approaching; with a breakup in the media Harry is now on "the market" for outlets to rip apart with other love interest pairings as he travels in the USA

Exciting things were coming into fruition! One Direction hit it off in the UK for their very first tour to promote their very first album Up All Night. Little Harry is living his dream and enjoying every moment of it with his best four mates. A Cheshire bakery boy is now transformed into a international sensation.

The media pushed for Harry to be perceived as a attractive young nudist friendly musician that can seduce men and enjoys women of all ages

Marketing plays the biggest role in a musician's career because it sets the tone for longevity, and Harry was a gold mine for sexual attention. As time goes by Harry's celebrity status elevates and speculation about his personal life becomes more intense and invasive.

WORK IN PROGRESS STANDBY

[smallest-fish-inthesea]

I’ve seen a lot of people complain about tmagp and say it doesn’t have the magic or draws them in like TMA did and I think it’s for multiple reasons

1: some of the cases are written by guest writers so ofc it’s not gonna be the same as Jonny and Alex’s writing

2: they’re not bullshitting their way through it anymore you can’t unlearn how to write/soundscape a podcast and part of the reason the quality is so good these days is BECAUSE of us, the fandom, funding them. They’re not recording under a pile of duvets anymore and it shows [i understand the appeal of the rawness of the earlier seasons of TMA where everything isn’t quite as polished but also like. Why are some of you mad about this???{

3: and potentially most importantly this is a universe we already know

I’ve heard Jonny go on multiple times about how the thing with TMA is that it becomes less scary the more it goes on because you discover more and more, you can’t be scared of the unknown if you already know what is hiding in the dark, it loses a certain sense of power.

And tmagp is (to an extent) a universe we have already discovered, we already know it, we know about the fears and the entities and avatars, ofc things don’t seem to work exactly the same but that doesn’t take away the fact that if you’ve listened to TMA you already have a WEALTH of knowledge about how things tend to function so of course it’s going to seem less horrifying and less intense because that’s just how things work here

I just think it’s a shame and a lot of people aren’t necessarily giving tmagp a fair chance over something that is literally impossible to change. Like said before, you can’t simply unknow things and that’s part of what makes the Magnus universes so interesting

Anyway. This isn’t like a call out post for anyone specific I’ve just seen a lot of it on my dash and it’s been frustrating me a lil

[phightingheadcanons]

though i might as well post this here too :P

might sound ridiculous but hear me out, banhammer is a notorious warden and in all his years, a criminal has never managed to escape his grasp. scythe however, is very sneaky and clever and has slipped through banhammer's fingers multiple times. banhammer (at least on a subconscious level) might actually respect her intelligence, begrudgingly.

scythe on the other hand respects banhammer's determination. he knows how dangerous she is and yet keeps coming back with everything he's got and will stop at nothing to finally capture her. scythe is used to easily outclassing others or having people give up trying to chase her after a few failed attempts. banhammer is someone who is finally giving her an actual challenge. that kind of willpower is respectable.

it's pretty clear that they both admire one thing: strength but in different forms. banhammer is all about brute strength and resilience meanwhile scythe admires tactical strength being smart, resourceful and being able to outwit her opponents. they both might recognize the strength they see in each other even though they won't admit it.

they're such 2 sides of the same coin always challenging and pushing each other and that's what makes them so appealing to me. love seeing the foil dynamic.

(again i wrote this really late at night so my apologies if this is incoherent.)

i love this. like the 2 enemies who only reach their full potential phighting each other. top 10 favorite character dynamics

[creativity-deficient]

#3. Most underrated character in your opinion?

So this one, at least for me, definitely depends on what exactly you’d define as “underrated”.

If we’re talking in terms of popularity, one character that definitely comes in mind to me is Tolkien. Not an unpopular character by any means! Just a personal favorite of mine and one I don’t feel like gets enough love, at least in comparison to some of the other boys!

Nichole is another favorite of mine (like as in, literally in my top 3) that I would love to see more of from this fandom! Again, she’s definitely not unpopular, but I do think she deserves more love!

David Rodriguez is one of my favorite minor characters, and I don’t see him get talked about nearly as much as some of the other minor characters!!

HOWEVER-

If you were to ask me who I think is the most underrated in terms of PERSONALITY?? Yall already KNOW my answer to this is Tweek. I know I’ve gone over this very subject multiple times atp, but I truly do think he is SUCH a complex character with a very strong personality, one that is often glossed over imo. Definitely not an underrated character in terms of popularity as he IS a fan favorite, but when it comes to him as an actual CHARACTER, I feel so much of him gets overlooked. I’m really glad I was able to find this community of people who love him and his character just as much as I do! 🥺

#4. Most overrated character in your opinion?

Tbh…none that I can think of? I like most of the characters, or at least can see the appeal in them, and the ones I don’t either aren’t very popular in the first place.

One of the things I love about this show is how memorable all the characters are, I don’t think any of them are “overrated” because I feel like there’s something to enjoy about most, if not all of them.

I know a lot of people consider Tweek and Craig to be overrated, and as someone who absolutely ADORES both characters, I can see where they’re coming from, as there are fans who do tend to treat them like they’re the ONLY characters in this show. However, both are EXTREMELY memorable and well developed characters in my opinion, who I think deserve every bit of love they get tbh. Not to mention, great rep for the gay community as well!!

You’re allowed to have your opinion on them, but I think it’s silly to complain about them getting a lot of love when that love is VERY much deserved!!!

#5. If you could bring ANY one-shot character back in the entire series, who would it be?

THEM!!! MY GIRLS!!!! THEY DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER 😭😭

I always feel SO bad for Tammy in “the ring” omg. Like imagine performing an explicit act on a guy, getting a bunch of hate for it and feeling ashamed because of it, then finally feeling comfortable enough with your new boyfriend to give it another try and then he fucking DIES??

And the fact that we never see her again after that like to I just need to know how my girl is 😭

And Rebecca was such a cute character, it always made me sad that she was reduced to just a “slut” in the end lmaooo, we never see her again after that either so who knows what happened to her after that.

#6. What is your most crack, crack ship- talking a pairing potentially no one has heard of?

Bit of a disappointing answer probably but I don’t think I have one lmaooo

#7. Favorite adult?

I could be missing some, but here’s some that come to mind (in no particular order)!!

#8. Favorite girl?

NICHOLE!!!

As stayed before, she’s definitely in my top three in terms of favorite characters. Shes such a cutie, I love her!!!

#10. Favorite episode?

Probably a bit of a cliche/boring answer lmao, but I personally really love the post covid specials and bigger, longer, uncut!

Tbh though, there’s a LOT of episodes I’d consider favorites of mine, it’s not letting me link it here but I’ve made a whole list of them in a recent post of mine if you scroll a bit back!

#11. Least favorite episode?

Mr Garrison’s fancy new vagina 😭 not only does it skeeve me out, but the transphobic themes are just…eugh 💀

It does have some funny moments to episode though, I will admit.

This part in particular KILLS me 😭😭😭

#16. Least favorite ship? (Keep it respectful)

I mean, unless we’re counting the obvious ones, like anything with incest, pedophilia, etc, there’s none I can really think of? I’m chill with most ships. Even if I don’t ship it myself, I’m not gonna stop people from enjoying what they like, so go ham!!

#17. Least favorite character?

Okay it’s not letting me include a photo of him but the dad from the elementary school musical episode?? I HATED him, he pissed me off sm omg. Whenever I see that man it’s on-SITE 😭😭😭

#20. Hopes for seasons going forward and specific episode tropes you’d like explored?

Honestly? I just hope to see them go back to the old format of episodes, with the boys getting up to their old shenanigans again. I miss that!

I feel like the show has lost a lot of its whimsy overtime. The newer seasons, while not bad, are just way too meta for me?? Sure, South Park has obviously always had SOME degree of meta/political satire to it, but it’s only ever been PART of the equation. Lately however, it’s gotten to the point where it no longer feels like a parody, just real life, and it just feels so…boring to me. The characters don’t even feel like actual characters half the time, just stand ins for when the creators want to make a point about something or to provide exposition. Even the way they interact with each other now can feel so boring and stale. Of course, I say all this pretty loosely as they absolutely do still have their moments, and there are still absolutely episodes and plotlines and character moments that I feel ARE very well written and enjoyable!! Hell, even some of my FAVORITE episodes come from these seasons!! But compared to a lot of other seasons?? I just don’t really care for these ones, for the most part at least.

The end of obesity special did give me high hopes however. I felt like that was the closest we’ve gotten to a really good classic episode in a while, with a few others before that having come pretty close as well!! The season 27 trailer also gives me high hopes! It definitely seems like they’ve been gradually easing back into the old format with time, so I’m excited to see what they’re going to come up with!!

#21. Favorite background or non-main character?

This was a tough one because I feel like it sorta depends on what your definition of “non-main character” would be? So I just went with characters that appear outside of the boys’ friend group and have had limited appearances/episode focus throughout the series!

#22. TFBW or SOT?

Mannn, that’s a TOUGH one! They’re both great! I think I am a little more biased towards tfbw though, as it was one of the first things that got me into the fandom. I also just enjoy the plot line slightly more! (not to mention all the creek moments we get hehe)

I definitely like tsot better in terms of aesthetic though, the character designs/concepts are sm cooler to me in that game!!

#23. If a new game is in the works, what theme would you like to see? Such as fantasy, superhero, futuristic, or so on?

Hmm, perhaps another superhero themed game? Since we got another fantasy themed one with snow day! It would be cool to see them explore other options too though, instead of just sticking to those themes. Perhaps they could make a game based off of any of the cards we see in phone destroyer! I think any of them could be fun, really! :))

@zoot-marimba @panicatthecourtx @justakidnamednick @shroomerr

[beemovieerotica]

Hadestown is NOT bad explain yourself this instant

ok so. it felt very concept album, like it still had a ways to go until it was a fully fledged production. they had the idea of the railroad station and the whole mining town aesthetic, but it was kind of window dressing to the story and didn't really mean much beyond imparting vibes and accompanying the genre of music they chose.

there was the whole theme of industry and greed from hades which i guess was an attempt to create political relevance but it didn't fit snugly anywhere? we're supposed to just understand that hades is a bad man who is doing bad things because he's bad - and then this creates the predicaments that eurydice and persephone find themselves in.

so basically the industry & modernization didn't have a purpose in itself, it was just a set-up for other things to happen narratively. i don't think they had to stick with the original myth or anything like that at all, they can make hades whomever they want, but i feel like i had to fill in the gaps in my head for all the character motivations to understand why they were doing the things they did. the hades / eurydice bit just happened and then was never addressed again, it seemed like something they threw in just to say "look, the capitalist boss also uses people for sex" - again, just to make a point to the audience but it didn't mean anything in the story.

so it did click with "oh! hades is creating warmth and brightness down below because he misses persephone's warmth and brightness, but he's doing it in a way that is harsh and glaring and deeply misguided and destructive, and it deprives the surface of trees and it pollutes the living things that persephone cares so much about, so he's ultimately driving her away by trying to replace her..." but they...did not explore that. they did not get into the deeper meaning and themes behind what was happening in either song or dialogue. i found myself kind of taken out by some of the lyrics just at the simplicity / cliche, i was wondering if it would go deeper at all and it really didn't for me. and then persephone and hades made up instantly at the end? just with a hand hold and a couple of meaningful words / looks? like there was so much potential to have some gut punch moments of meaning and heartache and reconciliation between them, and it just didn't transpire, like they ran out of time at the end.

so they seemed to have gotten halfway through developing the characters; all i know about eurydice is that she was cold and hungry. and hungry and cold. orpheus was a little bit more of a person at least in terms of making him a "head in the clouds" character, but they wanted to use shortcuts to just get to the love story without spending time on it. i get that inclination because, yeah on one hand it's a classical myth and we can accept that they just fell in love and all of it unfolded from there...but if you're going to stage it and make a musical at all, then why not explore how they fell in love, who they were, and what they actually meant to each other? there was no dimension to it and it just relied on the audience's acceptance of "this is how things happened in the myth."

i'm not completely sure what was going on with the wall other than it being another appeal to topical politics---and i don't like pedantry in media analysis BUT they chose to craft all of this in a deliberate way and they established multiple times that their world worked this way, so i have to ask the question: if there are supernatural forces that keep people from going in and out of hell on a whim.........what's the point?

like they were hovering between the subtext of "shhh this is actually busywork to convince the people that their labor is valuable" and "actually we want to keep people from trying to leave because it sucks here" with the latter contradicting their established rules of the world; all while hades is textually saying "we don't want people taking what we have" but people COULD just kill themselves to get down there anyway and be allowed through the wall. which eurydice did. which all dead people get to do. which makes me circle back to the conclusion of, yeah, some of these songs / plot devices got thrown in as a "this is so relevant wink wink hi audience" moment rather than actually enriching or making sense in the world of the story.

specifically for the broadway production, i can count on one finger the number of times the set was used in an interesting way [the crack in the wall]. it was very black box theater and i'm not opposed to minimalism, but it only works if there's something very engaging and compelling going on with the characters and the performances themselves, and a lot of the blocking & dancing was just not...interesting to look at. they moved chairs and tables around. god i would have loved if the final moment between orpheus and eurydice actually used the original lines where they say "You looked back" / "I missed you" like it would have meant something but they just had this weird tendency throughout to not lean into full emotional dialogue.

tldr; i think the vibes and intentions were good but it was messy narratively and the depth of character development and songwriting wasn't there for me. i think the Fates served cunt at every turn and i loved them, though i would have liked them to be used much more to really deliver those gut punches i was expecting but didn't get from the story. i'm a snob. sorry.

[shrimpothy]

literally what is the good in reporting "scammers". if it actually was a scammer great job they'll make another account and go on with their day. some probably wont notice if they're running multiple scams but if you managed to get an actual persons account deleted they have to make a new account prove that they're in an active war site go through the vetting process write a new fucking paragraph about their trauma (if they don't have it on hand already with how many accounts are scamjacketed and deactivated constantly) and regain their meager ass place in the algorithm. for daring to mildly inconvenience a tumblr user. i'm going insane

pls read all the way thru!!

~

is it weird that what makes me the most certain that they’re actually scam bots the fact that they would choose tumblr in the first place. like let me go to emo faggot land, a site that is believed to be dead by most people and is lowkey infamous for its bot problem, to get help. it makes more sense to post something like that on tiktok, instagram, xiaohongshu, etc. or at least imo.

in the event that families are actually flocking here in an attempt to receive help, someone should tell them that they’re likely to be ignored and assumed to be a bot. if you’re gonna support a scam, tell these accounts to catfish people on sugar daddy apps to get donations. there are lonely rich dudes willing to pay to just talk to people. or shit, asking a findom to get their subs to donate could work too.

~

but on a more serious note, it’s generally safer, and better for everyone involved, to help people through legit organizations (like pcrf, map, unicef, unwra, wfp, wck, rescue, etc.) anyways, as these are actual nonprofits and welfare programs and they have potential to reach more than just one family at a time, which is ultimately more effective and efficient when it comes to saving palestine as a whole. it’s secure and safer to trust.

not all people are moral, a lot of humans use whatever they can to their advantage. if someone wants money, even if they don’t remotely need it, they will find a way to get it.

the internet has been littered with scams since its conception.

do not trust strangers with your account information, do not trust strangers with your money, do not trust strangers on the internet, do not trust strangers. full stop.

remember, dead internet theory isn’t a theory anymore. bots have already begun to reign supreme.

~

anyways,

here’s more links to some helpful resources in regards to being confident in your efforts to support palestine.

protect palestine - essentially a palestinian support masterlist

palestinian solidarity campaign

the blop - big list of protests, not just for palestine but still useful and relevant

click to help /li ‼️- this one is great for my fellow broke and/or depressed bitches that lack the funds or energy to contribute more significantly but still want to help out. you best believe that activism burnout is real and prevalent, which is another thing this is good for

is it legit? - read charity reviews and ratings

us campaign for palestinian rights

decolonize palestine - learn about palestine and its culture! history, literature, myth busting, and more

palestine legal - if you need lawful help in your support efforts. this is especially important with the kidnappings of activists that’s been occurring as of late

heal palestine

build palestine’s list of trusted orgs

muslims around the world - they’re international but i linked their palestinian donation page specifically

un crisis relief for gaza

donate stock or crypto to project hope

wear the peace - clothes as activism. all profits go to gazan aid

penny appeal

doctors without borders - helps over 70 different countries, including palestine, ukraine, sudan, and the democratic republic of congo

sign up to volunteer at helping hand for relief and development

impactive - app for organizing and volunteering

turn up activism - app for youth activism

BDS movement

apps and sites to help with your boycotting: no thanks, boycott for peace, goods unite us, uplift

aweea’s list of palestinian owned businesses in USA, CANADA, UK, and AU

shop palestine

actions you can take to help

[liasblocks]

im so excited for the thunderbolts* and have been thinking about how the team defeat the void. and there have been some interesting behind the scene shots of the team with bob in the void. like when bucky punches the man dressed up as chicken or the team in what looks like to be a childhood room. not to mention then in a lab potentially the one where we see the void freeze two people standing up

photos and more explanation below the cut

here we can see the bob with the others in a place that i am presuming to be the void.

now we get to what im assuming is bobs childhood room and this location pops up multiple times in the thunderbolts* featurette trailer

The lab that yelena visits and steals vials out of looks like the same lab sentry could have been experimented with, at first

what makes me believe this is that shelves/lab benches are the same

as well as all that, in the actors listing there is a credit for bobs father which makes me believe the team is not only going through their memories but also bobs to try and appeal to him and stop the void

[planckstorytime]

Your Journey Ends: A Parting Retrospective on Dragon Age (Part Six)

VI. Apotheosis

At a glance, Dragon Age: Inquisition is deeply flawed. The open world, while wide and vibrant, lacks direction in its quest design, with no clear distinction between which quests are rewarding or interesting amid a sea of chores. Skipping the open world entirely, however, robs the player of vital character interactions, lore tidbits, atmosphere, and overall makes the game feel too brief. Thus, there is a problem of not knowing which quests are worth spending your time on, and how much. It doesn’t help that mounts are virtually useless for traversing these vast regions. The war table operations present interesting quests with compelling decision-making opportunities, but their timed nature stifles them, gutting their potential. Combat has shifted even more toward real-time action, and the tactical macros are more limited than ever. Even in the otherwise excellent main story, issues arise. Namely, the main villain loses all semblance of menace after the first encounter with him.

With all of that said, you might wonder why Dragon Age: Inquisition is my favorite game in the series, why it’s one of my favorite games of all time, why I’ve logged almost 500 hours in it across multiple playthroughs, and why it’s my main impetus for writing this essay. The answer is complicated, and has as much to do with my own state of mind at the time that it came out as it does with the game’s intrinsic qualities.

But first, I want to address some of the previous criticisms. Frankly, none of those things bothered me. Inquisition released in 2014, before the open world fatigue hit. Back then, only really big and prestigious titles had huge, lavishly detailed worlds to explore. It also came out a year before The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt (2015), which would set a higher standard for open world interactivity and immersive quest design. As such, playing Inquisition on release never felt subpar to me – the world was breathtaking, and it allowed you to delve into the realm of Thedas more substantially than ever. It offered a sense of freedom akin to The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim (2011), but accompanied it with better writing and characterization. Since the standard of open world gameplay has raised substantially in the intervening years, Inquisition’s foray might not be as impressive to modern players, but it was so easy to get hooked on it at the time.

Combat, too, never irked me – though I also never cared too much for the combat in either Origins or DA2. I think there’s a satisfying flow to Inquisition’s battles that rewards both proper builds and real-time mechanical mastery. I know I’m in the minority, but I honestly like the emphasis on magical barriers, warrior guard generation, and rechargeable potions over healing spells and inventory stockpiling. Not to say the latter is bad, but I think the former works well with how Inquisition integrates its encounters into exploration. Plus, you can run as a knight-enchanter and cleave through enemies with a lightsaber.

But it’s in the aesthetic, artistic, and character departments that Inquisition truly shines. I think the series found its ideal tone here. It’s lighter, more hopeful than those of Origins and DA2, but not at the expense of nuance or maturity. After what I considered the overbearing edginess of the second installment – not to mention the suffocating grimness of Mass Effect 3 (2012) – Inquisition’s earnest and optimistic outlook appealed to me. I also think this is where the series’s art direction peaked. Origins presents a realistic, immersive world, but one that’s also drab and lacking in distinctness. DA2 went for a more stylized, exaggerated look to everything. Inquisition gravitates more toward the realistic proportions and shading of Origins, but spices up some of the designs to reflect the opulence of the Orlesian setting, as well as injecting much more color into the world. This, too, was a welcome sight in 2014, as we were finally escaping the curse of games at large looking gray, brown, and muddy. The diversity of Inquisition’s biomes also acted as a much needed reprieve from Dragon Age 2’s endless reiteration of the same dungeons.

Inquisition boasts my favorite cast of the entire series. The player has twelve main disciples (not exactly subtle, in a game about faith), and all of them have unique silhouettes that set them apart, without anyone looking too over-the-top like Isabela or out-of-place like Fenris. Their personalities are just as distinct, and all loaded with hidden depth that can be teased out. Banter sessions are fantastically entertaining and often display conflicts of ideals that give the world texture (without ever making me question why these people are working together).

I never tallied up and compared the total number of choices between DA2 and Inquisition against each other, but I always felt like I had more influence over the story of the latter. The player can choose the race of their avatar again, with the addition of qunari added to the standard selection of human, elf, and dwarf. The mage/templar choice in the first act influences a variety of aspects going forward, including three pairs of mutually exclusive boss encounters, different sub-villains, and variations on the epilogue slides. The ending that decides who gets inducted as the new Divine and what policies they implement also depends on a medley of choices made throughout the game, rather than a single critical moment. You also get to choose who rules Orlais from a set of five options, the status of the Grey Wardens in Orlais, and even the fate of Hawke. Not to mention the judgments that the Inquisitor makes from their throne, where humbled and defeated NPCs face trial and punishment at the player’s mercy.

All this contributes to an awesome sense of power, in stark contrast to the previous game. Indeed, Inquisition’s illusion of power is intoxicating. There’s an inherent coolness in managing an entire organization, deploying troops and moving mountains at the player’s whim, and recruiting NPCs to populate your personal castle and serve your cause. Exploring the open world and seeing fortresses the Inquisition’s conquered, towns under its protection, or soldiers delivering you treasure out in the field – it all generates this palpable sense of authority that makes roleplaying as a (reluctant) messiah more real and gratifying. “Power” is such an important word for Inquisition that it’s literally used as a currency for the war table operations.

The other operative word is “faith.” In addition to its religious themes, which we’ll touch on soon, Inquisition seems to reward players’ faith for sticking with the series to this point – especially regarding how it carries over past decisions in interesting ways. We finally follow up on Morrigan and her potential child, as well as Alistair, Hawke, and tons of small, personally crafted references and cameos. More importantly, it answers some the major mysteries that the series has lingered on, assuring the audience that it is, in fact, going somewhere with its overarching story. We learn truths about red lyrium, Flemeth, the Blight, the enigmatic Titans, and the elusive Dread Wolf. Inquisition reinvigorated my interest in the lore of Dragon Age after I thought I had given up. In many ways, it felt like the sequel I wanted after Origins.

Beyond these appeals, faith and power both play critical roles in the game’s themes and the individual arcs of its major characters. And these concepts do not go uncriticized within the narrative itself.

Full article: https://planckstorytime.wordpress.com/2025/03/29/your-journey-ends-a-parting-retrospective-on-dragon-age/

[promoxie]

What if I told y'all that Jericho and Beast Boy from the 03 series run of Teen Titans had spectacular dynamic potential. This post goes on for far too long but we die like fanfiction writers.

Parts of this rant come from my headcannons about Jericho in his original material, as well as personal headcannons about Jericho because Jericho doesn't get much screentime in 03, but Jericho's personality, in my opinion is pretty much what you'd expect. Jericho is someone who's very kind and empathetic, he is also someone strong-willed, morally adhesive and extremely honest. He's not a strong physical fighter, his powers are very situationally dependent, but he makes due with what he has. I also headcannon that he's nomadic in the 03 version because he only has his dad, Slade, for family but that he doesn't want to live with him. He also doesn't know anything about his father's villainous life. However, if he were to discover his father's villainous lifestyle, as well as his father's intentions to destroy the Teen Titans, I have no doubt that, like in other material, 03 Jericho would totally reject him because he is a good sweet boy.

Here's the thing, what I'm getting at here is that this interpretation of Jericho's personality and theming and his moral code and actions in this fanfictiony 03 setting is entirely opposite of Terra 03's cannon personality and theming, her moral code and actions. I've always been big on the opinion that Terra sabatoges herself on multiple occasions, that her actions and opinions and cruel behavior are not just products of Slade, but are inherent signs of metal disorder within Terra, disorders that she is aware of and chooses not to fight, which ultimately divides her from the Titans. The Titans were people that she never truly trusted, nor got over her jealous biases with. She pins her feelings of lost opportunities and spiraling lifestyle on their successes and abilities to move forward, is envious of them, and she utilities manipulative behavior with Beast Boy and Beast Boy most in particular. Her "Do you trust me", and "If you're really my friend I can tell you anything and you won't be mad at me", "I have no choice", ECT, are requests for him to accept her for who she is, forgive her, run away, which would cause him to lose his home, his life, and the trust of his loved ones. He denies them, he has to, yet Beast Boy still tries to change her and appeal to her. He stands up for her, he tries to make her a better person, but in the end, she still chooses not to be a Titan.

This isn't a criticism of Terra's character, I love Terra's portrayal as someone who is inherently toxic and flawed, someone who knows that they have these problems but doesn't work to fix them and instead, feeds them until she self destructs. Terra's not stupid, she knows she has these problems, she just doesn't try to get better. You cannot help or save a someone who is mentally ill if that person is not willing to be better, and I love how those things are represented well in the actions of Terra. Her problems are a whole nother reason why I don't think Terra could have ever been real Titan, and that's because one of the principal things that a Titan requires is empathy, and empathy is an emotion that Terra detrimentally lacks, likely a direct result of mental disorder.

Back again, Jericho is the opposite of all these things and qualities, most particularly the one about empathy. He's considerate and forgiving, he is not easy offended as we saw when Beast Boy ranted at him about climbing mountains and Jericho just gives him a little pat on the head when he stops yelling and collapses. If Terra's toxic personality and tendency to not be truthful were all contributions of a negative gain for Beast Boy's well being, then Jericho's positivity, honesty, and a desire for connection, could all be net positives. They are also, in 03, the same age, similar builds and heights, in prime positions as a well written duo dynamic if they were to share other interests, like comics or video games. They are both at stereotypical ages to where they would seek out other peers, and while Beast Boy does have friends while Jericho appears not to, his friends are all older, more mature, and do not share most of his hobbies or interests. Beast Boy also has an extra bed in his room that he never uses, and it wouldn't be strange for Jericho to sleep over there, should they become friends.

Now I wanna talk about Slade, and this is another one of my big points on why a Jericho and Beast Boy duo would be fantastic, and it's because the relationship between Slade and Beast Boy is a relationship of total hatred and personal disrespect. Beast Boy hates Slade on a major level, more than he hates any other villain. We see this in Things Change, as well as every other time Beast Boy deals with Slade post his involvement with Terra. He hates Slade because Slade successfully managed to gain a creepy relationship with Terra, telling Beast Boy things like "You couldn't give her what she wanted", hitting Beast Boy where it hurts and taking advantage of his youth and immaturity to the point where Beast Boy is the most vulnerable to Slade's actions, words and taunts, causing him to lose his head while in battle. Beast Boy is not like Robin, though Robin is affected by Slade just as well, he claims that he is not affected by Slade when he very clearly is, but Robin does eventually heal from Slade, and he does eventually triumph over Slade, and their rivalry, though still alive, does receive some closure.

Beast Boy and Slade's relationship does not end like that, if anything, Beast Boy gets another slap in the face right before the series ends. He tries to get revenge against Slade in Things Change, creating total havoc in his animalistic rage to do it, but that Slade was just another robot, a trick, one last laugh Slade can hold over Beast Boy. Another thing I'd like to point out is that Slade does not like or respect Beast Boy in any way, it's not like Robin, where Slade sees qualities in Robin that he likes, Slade Hates Beast Boy, and that makes a lot of sense. If Robin is a paragon of someone who is mature for their age, someone smart and cool and capable, then Beast Boy is the paragon of someone who is immature, someone who is silly and not serious, and someone who likes to have a lot of fun and good times. He is exactly the kind of person that Slade would dislike, AND, he also hates Beast Boy for his relationship with Terra. It's true. Slade is very creepy about Terra, the whole scene that occurs in the hall of mirrors shows that, and he insults Beast Boy, calling him a "pet" and belittles his relationship with Terra. He tells Beast Boy that he doesn't know Terra, insinuating that He does by contrast, claims that Terra never actually liked him to begin with. Slade is jealous, and that adds to his hatred for Beast Boy.

So what am I getting at here? Well, Slade's son turning out to be a reliable friend for Beast Boy is a fantastic way to turn it around and bring this animosity back into the spotlight but in Beast Boy's favor. Jericho would not betray his friends to gain face with his father, and for someone like Beast Boy, who has been betrayed for Slade once before, that could be a huge deal for him. Finding someone who has a connection to Slade in such a meaningful way, in a way that is even stronger than Terra's apprenticeship, then showing that person as a person he can trust is such a thing that could help Beast Boy heal, giving him too some back up when it comes to his personal animosity towards Slade. Robin receives tons of support from his team when it comes to his trauma with Slade, but Beast Boy, probably because he is not sharing his personal grievances, is completely alone when it comes to his trauma. If it mattered to Beast Boy, then Jericho might want to help Beast Boy defeat Slade, or would want to stop Slade for his own reasons, in the original comics he's that kind of hero.

Nevermind that if 03 Slade cares about Jericho being his son in any way at all, then the idea of Jericho betraying him for a boy that he despises would be icing on the cake, cause wow. What the hell. Slade just went though all this effort to traumatize the boy, then his own son comes in and starts undoing all his hard work? Ironic much?

[drsp00n]

Enough time has passed and everyone's wrote their thought pieces about it so I'm gonna chip in with a little bit of my own.

NMH3 is kind of ass in spite of its limitations, not because of them. The priorities are all over the place.

The gameplay loop becomes incredibly repetitive very quickly. I've seen people try to play word games about the semantics of a hallway of enemies across multiple screens being the exact same as a gauntlet in one room, but at least the fucking environment changes instead of being the exact maybe 8 rooms over the course of 100 possible battles.

There's little in the realm of unlocks. You can play the game start to finish without even touching the chip crafting system or the stats tree. No new moves, death glove chips or weapons. All you really need is to raise your attack to deal with the same enemies with just a larger health pool later in the game. Your kit doesn't change from start to finish.

The open world does fucking nothing for me. You could have made one map with less to explore but more to interact with, instead of five barren and flat maps with nothing to do. I know why this is, but I'll get to that in a bit.

The narrative is significantly weaker than TSA which is a huge shame. I'm imagining that they didn't want the characters to be so wordy in fully voice acted cutscenes like they were in TSA, but I would have loved to see more of the IBM style cutscenes if it meant getting to know more about the characters. Everyone just feels so underwritten so you have to fill in the blanks with your own preconceived notions and the stereotypes they're supposed to convey, something people give NMH2 shit for doing with its characters.

Fu and Damon are NOT compelling characters, one's a brat and the other one is a boring evil CEO archetype. They have zero depth, and for the time that they do give them on screen, all they do is bitch about Travis or everyone around them. Travis doesn't seem even interested in either of them beyond killing them for being annoying. Badman was just fridged to establish Fu as a threat, as if fucking killing every single civilian wasn't enough.

The stuff with Henry could have been interesting if the story had given it any kind of significance or time to breathe. I'm with Travis on that one, I really don't fucking care anymore. There's a giant space alien ship up there dude, that seems a little more important right now than our sad crybaby backstory that will go nowhere because NMH4 is never getting made.

And lastly, I think this game is the most suffocated by all the pop culture references. The premise of the game is a reference, the intro of the game is a reference, many of the bosses, side missions and characters are references, the final boss is a reference. All of this is cool in small bits, but it makes me feel like NMH3 has no real identity of it's own. Which leads me to this conclusion:

Suda should really have doubled down and made something weird and different again. Instead we got a game that is flanderizing No More Heroes itself. People like the open world of 1, boom, open world. People hated the combat of TSA, here's 100 fights. Look, it's the mowing grass minigame. Look, it's Destroyman. Look, it's Henry. Look it's a Marvel reference. Look, it's a Miike reference.

It just feels like the weakest of all the games to me. It tries to do a lot, and what it does is not very good. I don't hate it, I've beaten it a couple of times. I just feel like it wasted a lot of it's potential appealing to the loud majority instead of just being a smaller but better experience, but that's just me.