#but like the very inane shit will be

[triaelf9]

FYI for folks who want to follow someone for dragon age stuff without the petty drama and discourse, I'm here, this is the account for you XD

If you know me, you know what I mean when I say petty. tldr not all dragon age discourse is petty, but my space will be CHILL

[crustycrackhead]

Swampcat but the fic I can’t fucking write but I’m throwing the idea to the tank of sharks— I need to like clean it up but this is a very barebones sketch lol— also I think it would be slay if Kremy has reading glasses (old man)

*I sit a round table full of papers, it’s frantic, it’s crazy (normal), I sound desperate as I describe the scenes to you*

Go under here for my crazy

First lil encounter to me where they start piquing each other’s interests… you picking up what I’m putting down?

Somethign somethign, they usually do their paperwork, accounting, tax fraud in complete silence. It’s both of their quiet time, it’s a welcomed bliss because the rest of the party is pretty loud. ADHD AUTISM BODY DOUBLING MOMENT OKAY!!!

Okay anyway, I think from what I picked up, they’re both pretty competent at handling money and numbers. (Good at math, Frost would be really into theoretical mathematicals while Kremy is more applied maths core. This is all headcanon lol). FUCK IM BAD AT SUMMARIZING SHIT BYT ANYWAYS—

Eventually during their wordless agreement, they begrudgingly let each other check each other’s work, looking for errors and proofreading shit. Mutual respect (THIS IS LIKE SEX TO ME). Blah blah blah, you’re prolly getting tired of me rambling BUT UR IN MY LION’S DEN AND YOU MUST SIT AND LISTEN TO ME!!! 🫵🫵🫵

Frost leans in as he looks over Kremy’s paperwork (this is the sexiest thing to me okay), the fur from his cheek rubs against Kremy’s scales of his neck. I think texture wise, it’s like autism heaven bruh. They’re each other’s stimboard. THAT’S THE DYNAMIC I LIKE MMM YUMMY. It just feels nice to be in each other’s presence, fur against scales, cool against warmth, thermodynamic equilibrium.

Have a Drabble meow ⬇️

————

There’s a tension in the air so thick he could’ve cut it with a knife, and the offer from Frost still rings in Kremy’s head. The lizardfolk almost felt dizzy even thinking about it.

“I can amend that”

Frost’s words repeated in his head, voice deeper than usual. It was such a vague offer but Kremy knew what laced those words, he saw the hunger in that tiger’s eyes. He might just take up his offer, the thrill of it made his spine shiver.

———-

Like imagine that, lien taht, that’s the flavor, the thrill in the anticipation of it! THEY’RE FREAKSSASA !!!!! FREAKSSSS

[orangerosebush]

Socmed discussions about Saltburn, to me —

1) reveal that people are even more squeamish about explicit gay sexuality than they think they are

(And if this is what passes for shocking erotic excess, then we, in the anglosphere, are in a more — not making a comment about individuals here — restrained moment with mainstream American/British adult cinema than we were with mainstream adult heterosexual cinema in the 90s, eg the erotic thriller)

And

2) suggest people are increasingly making art that is in conversation with, if not explicitly nostalgic for, the 2010-16 Tumblr-era.

(I really truly suspect Saltburn is, in part, an adaptation of the tropes and aesthetics that were in certain “The Social Network” fan spaces.)

[dream-sans-mogai]

This will probably get looks from performative and ultimately harmful non-transfems despite my being transfem but-

Some y'alls only interaction with feminist history and theories, radical feminism regardless of its intersectionality and really any feminism deeper and louder and meaner than blatant choice feminism like the barbie movie and whatever TF taylor swift thinks shes got going on is through your occasional and short interactions with terfs and it shows. You call vagina art terfy and it fucking isnt. Its feminist art. Your brainrot is making you a fucking mra. The fact y'all think talking about the man vs bear situation is about/started/ran by terfs (and encouraged some really questionable other transfems shitting on it despite it clearly just being about women's safety and yes all men, not transphobia.), everything from questioning wether certain groups belong in our community to thinking a word is a slur or having a lesbian icon (I have sources don't test me) or not to not liking a certain band has been called "terf rhetoric". I'm all for us Transmascs talking about how terfs affect us cause they absolutely do and their harm to the transmasc community can not be understated but like.... Y'all are not allowed to call Jack shit terf rhetoric anymore. Like nothing. You don't know what it means, you litterally call transmedicalism and sysmedicalism terf rhetoric. Do you mean exclusionist? Say exclusionist. Terfs are not the end all be all hate group. They have a very specific complex mindset that affects so many people in specific ways. Someone hating Neopronouns is not fucking terf rhetoric. It's nbphobia. Holy fuck. Learn what words mean.

(intersectional trans radfems exist, radical feminism isn't terfs and swerfs and historical radfems would laugh in their faces for their idiocy)

[phoenixkaptain]

I wish I was one of those people who made side blogs for all of my interests so that my blog wouldn’t be such a clusterfuck, but unfortunately I don’t want to. I’m stuck with this mess, now everyone else is too.

[child-of-hurin]

fic writers. often heroes*

[gnc-tits]

i genuinely have such an issue w how the general internet approaches trigger warnings like on all sides it just fuckin sucks. either theyre completely unnecessary and if u need one ur a baby or u need to tag every possible trigger theres like no in between. and the meaning of what a trigger actually is gets watered in the process like i know this is kind of 2018 to bitch about but i am irritated!!!!!!!!

[scalpelsister]

anyways i need to be humanely euthanized <3

[nostalgebraist]

In other uncanny-valley AI voice news...

Google has this new thing called "NotebookLM," which allows you to upload any document, click a button, and then a few minutes later receive an entire AI-generated podcast episode (!) about the document. The generation seems to occur somewhat faster than real-time.

(This is currently offered for free as a demo, all you need is a Google account.)

These podcast episodes are... they're not, uh, good. In fact, they're terrible – so cringe-y and inane that I find them painful to listen to.

But – unlike with the "AI-generated content" of even the very recent past – the problem with this stuff isn't that it's unrealistic. It's perfectly realistic. The podcasters sound like real people! Everything they say is perfectly coherent! It's just coherently ... bad.

It's a perfect imitation of superficial, formulaic, cringe-y media commentary podcasts. The content isn't good, but it's a type of bad content that exists, and the AI mimics it expertly.

The badness is authentic. The dumb shit they say is exactly the sort of dumb shit that humans would say on this sort of podcast, and they say it with the exact sorts of inflections that people would use when saying that dumb shit on that sort of podcast, and... and everything.

(Advanced Voice Mode feels a lot like this too. And – much as with Advanced Voice Mode – if Google can do this, then they can presumably do lots of things that are more interesting and artistically impressive.

But even if no one especially likes this kind of slop, it's highly inoffensive – palatable to everyone, not likely to confuse anyone or piss anyone off – and so it's what we get, for now, while these companies are still cautiously testing the waters.)

----

Anyway.

The first thing I tried was my novel Almost Nowhere, as a PDF file.

This seemed to throw the whole "NotebookLM" system for a loop, to some extent because it's a confusing book (even to humans), but also to some extent because it's very long.

I saw several different "NotebookLM" features spit out different attempts to summarize/describe it that seemed to be working off of different subsets of the text.

In the case of the generated podcast, the podcasters appear to have only "seen" the first 8 (?) chapters.

And their discussion of those early chapters is... like I said, pretty bad. They get some basic things wrong, and the commentary is painfully basic even when it's not actually inaccurate. But it's still uncanny that something like this is possible.

(Spoilers for the first ~8 chapters of Almost Nowhere)

The second thing I tried was my previous novel, The Northern Caves.

The Northern Caves is a much shorter book, and there were no length-related issues this time.

It's also a book that uses a found-media format and includes a fictitious podcast transcript.

And, possibly because of this, NotebookLM "decided" to generate a podcast that treated the story and characters as though they existed in the real world – effectively, creating fanfiction as opposed to commentary!

(Spoilers for The Northern Caves.)

----

Related links:

I tried OpenAI's Advanced Voice Mode ChatGPT feature and wrote a post about my experiences

I asked NotebookLM to make a podcast about my Advanced Voice Mode post, with surreal results

Tumblr user ralfmaximus takes this to the limit, creating NotebookLM podcast about the very post you're reading now

[luvtak]

when you know, you know ✭ yji

✭ genre/tw sugary sweet fluff, est. relationship, innie being very sweet, innie and reader being so in love its sick, ‘tiny’ used as a petname, like one swear word ? mostly unedited

✭ w/c 1005

✭ a/n i wrote this in about 5 hours so it could be so bad, who knows :// also, i was listening to the most sickeningly soft love songs so this is where all my devastation went… i hope you love it!! (divider from @cafekitsune !!)

There's something about the morning air that makes you look like an angel: Flushed cheeks and bitten-red lips, your hair still mussed from his hands. He can’t stop himself from staring at you, eyes sweeping to your form huddled in the corner of the practice room. You didn’t want to be here, adamantly refusing when he woke you up this morning, only agreeing when he told you he’d buy you ice cream for breakfast–a deal that left him exasperated until he tasted the sugary treat from your lips. He was reminded why he loved you then… it was the way the sun glinted off your cheekbones, warm light encasing you in a glow that hit him right in the heart. 

When you arrived at practice, greeting all the boys with tight hugs and uncontained grins, the lovesickness started rising up in his throat, and Jeongin did all he could not to embarrass himself in front of his hyungs. He never thought he’d be this gone, so incredibly smitten for somebody, alas the picture you form in his life is endlessly heart breaking.

��You know, in the last ten minutes Innie has looked over here probably five times…” Laughs Seugmin from his place next to you. 

“I did notice that, yes.” you respond. In truth, there hasn’t been one moment of your relationship where you haven’t noticed when Jeongin looks at you. Something about his stare being so hot against your skin that even with your eyes closed you would know he was looking. 

It makes you shy to think about Seungmin noticing your boyfriend’s devotion– your love is so often a secret, a whisper in the dark, a kiss shared with the light off. A love so intimate that it’s often masked with jokes and incessant teasing, anything to make it seem less than it is. When someone is your whole world, when you could survive just off the air in their lungs, that love is too great to be shared. 

Although, you can’t blame Seungmin for noticing. Your boyfriend has looked at you an inane amount of times in the last hour, glimpsing and glaring at you while he should be focused on the choreo. You could count on both hands how many times he’s been yelled at for messing up a step, even now during their break, with Minho berating him, he’s staring at you. 

“See! look at that! What a love drunk dummy, Minho Hyung is gonna kill him.” You can only half hear Seungmin, your eyes stuck on Jeongin’s smile, so pretty and all yours. You didn’t want to be here this morning, having plans to laze around the house in nothing but his sweater and watch stupid tv until he got home, but he begged and begged you to join him; cuddling into you and kissing all over your face until you agreed to come. The ice cream he bought you was only the icing on the cake, as sweet as all the kisses he placed on your skin. How happy you are now that you’re here, getting to see your boy smile and laugh and stare. “Oh god, there you go… you’d think you two would be over each other by now.” 

Unfortunately, the boy is left unanswered as Jeongin finds himself walking towards you, shit eating grin on full display, love in his eyes and mischief on his tongue. He’s so desirable, so undeniably handsome that it kills you to have other people around. 

“Hey loser,” your boyfriend says, “wanna go get a snack?”

“Will that snack be another ice cream cone? Cause if so count me in.” 

“Whatever you want, tiny.” he smiles, grabbing your hand to pull you off the floor and out of the room. Arms holding you tight through the hallways of the company, yet before you can go too far, he’s pulling you into an empty room and pressing his skin to yours. 

It’s not a hug really, his arms aren’t wrapped around you, but he’s so close to you. His nose is settled in your hair and his hands are so warm around your wrists, and even with your eyes closed you know his eyes are settled on you. He’s looking everywhere, from your sneakers to his sweater that wraps around you. Jeongin thinks you’re the loveliest thing he’s ever seen, and if he was braver he would’ve kissed you in the practice room. He would’ve touched you where the light hit, breathed in your air before stealing the words from your lips. If he was braver he would take the teasing from the other boys, if he was braver he would share his love with the whole world… but it’s so safe like this. 

The planet goes silent when he’s alone with you, the only thing on his mind your strawberry kisses. 

“You’re so pretty, tiny.” he whispers, his hands coming around your waist to clutch at you, holding on to you like he’ll never get the chance again. 

“You’re prettier, Innie, like a daydream.” In any other situation, your words would bring a scowl to his face, but here all alone in this empty room, he can’t help but smile. How lovesick can he be that he doesn’t find your silly confessions corny anymore? 

He can’t wait another moment without kissing you, without feeling your life bleed into his. In seconds he’s decided, and without hesitation he’s settling his rosebud lips against yours. The kiss is slow, a profession of everything he won’t let himself say out loud: He loves you, you’re perfect, you’re all he’s ever wanted. He kisses you in place of words that won’t come, his palms encasing your face so delicately, a caress that's been perfected. 

After a lifetime he pulls away, leaving you with goosebumps and shaky vision, you understood what he was saying. Heard every word he put into the kiss, felt every feeling he needed you to feel. 

He may not be able to love you in more than a whisper, but it’s the prettiest lullaby you’ve ever heard. 

© LUVTAK 2024

[bellasfortuna]

butcher!simon has been on the brain so have a small brainworm i've been sitting on

TW: implied dark thoughts, implied kidnapping, creepy Ghost and leering Johnny, slightly NSFW

When the door to the butcher shop opened, the first thing she noticed was the lack of a chime or bell; instead there was only dead silence and the smell of coppery tang and cleaning solution. The shop wasn't completely silent, there was a small table, only two men, in the very corner of the shop, barely visible from the window outside, crammed in the corner. Their bodies seemed almost too large for the shitty metal chairs they were hunched in, talking amongst themselves.

What drew her eye next was the incredibly large and hulking form of the butcher behind the counter; the man was mammoth sized, blood stained apron around his middle, shirt slightly stained (what was the point of wearing the apron at all if he wasn't going to wear it completely?, she thought absently), sleeves rolling up his biceps unwillingly from the stretch of the muscles and veins there. As she drew closer to the counter, to the hulk of a man, could she even call him a man? his face was covered by a surgical mask and his hair was shaggy and unevenly cut like he'd shorn it himself, dirty blond and messy, a scar peeking out from the corner of the mask to his cheekbone, his form seemed even larger, more imposing.

But what caught his attention, no visual indication or warning, was how utterly uncaring she seemed, having just walked into a butcher shop in a rather seedy part of town, that was well known for how unfriendly the butcher was. Simon had seen the reviews (not that he cared, wasn't his business if whatever tosser passing through thought his service was shite and his shop wasn't friendly, his regularly knew his product was good and his cuts were prime), reviews that should scare off birds that looked like her, that wandered around looking too fragile and soft.

She seemed more interested in looking through the glass case, perusing the cuts he had on display, and for now, Simon was content to just leave her be, she wasn't loud or obnoxious (unlike Johnny in the corner who'd parked his ass there with Garrick for the better half of the morning), and she'd yet to ask any inane questions that would require Simon to have to speak. Just as she looked up, eyes connecting with his, her soft brown eyes colliding with his darker irises, the door to the shop opened again, more forcefully, her mouth shutting and stalling whatever question she'd been about to ask.

If Simon hadn't felt mildly annoyed before, he was certainly annoyed now; he wanted to know just how ignorant the bird was, but his annoyance flared into something darker when the newcomer opened his mouth. While Simon stayed silent as the two argued, he gleaned some information from the brusque conversation. The girl wasn't from here, at least her accent was foreign, as was his, so Simon surmised they were either visiting or had just moved nearby. He hoped it was the former concerning the scrawny shit that was now standing in his shop.

The boy made some comment about how she shouldn't be here alone, he had offered to come with her, yet, she brushed him off easily and said she was more than capable of coming to a butcher by herself and getting what they needed for 'the get-together', as she called it, turning back to look at the counter, saying she had been to more than enough butchers to know what cuts she needed, she hardly needed a second, lesser informed, shadow. Simon doubted this but he found it amusing to hear.

Simon watched with disinterest, the annoyance at the squabble going on before him still festering, but standing with his arms crossed over his chest, muscles tight, hoping they'd be done quicker and his shop would return to peace. For such a soft looking thing, she apparently had a backbone, though Simon would have been far more rude and unwelcoming, if someone hadn't listened to him; he didn't care much when the boy made a comment about his shop being unsafe, how these parts had unsavory people, he wasn't entirely wrong but the world wasn't kind to weak people who avoided all conflict. The boy looked like he'd snap in half if Simon leered at him too hard.

What did catch Simon's interest, was the quickness of her hand shooting up and smacking the boy upside the head, the sound cracking through the butcher shop. "Were you raised in a damn barn?" she barked, face unamused as she glared at the boy. "You don't say shit like that." While the boy looked rather nonplussed and incensed, Simon was definitely very interested now, eyeing her delicate small hand, the sound it had made connecting with his head, the wince it had caused.

He wondered how it'd feel against his face, his cheek, if he could fuck away the anger in her face afterwards, his hands pinning her delicate wrists above her head as he sank into her plush body. She didn't seem to notice his darker gaze as the boy left and she made her order in peace, her voice soft again and cordial. She did at least know what she asked for, not using generic shopping terms,so Simon assumed she was being truthful earlier, and that made something writhe inside him. She'd known what she wanted and she had come to his shop. She didn't notice when he gave her a nicer cut of the deli meats and trimmings she'd requested, a little more than she'd asked and paid for, taking the paper wrapped package with a small smile.

She definitely didn't notice when, as she left the butcher shop, package in her tote bag, Simon nodded his head at Johnny before sharply inclining his head towards the door, the shaggy mowhawked man following behind her obediently. Afterall, a butcher needs the best and what better way than sending his dog.

[danburys]

i think one of the things about hardison/parker/eliot is that it'll always be kinda unpredictable whose side the third will take in a debate between two of them.

parker is authentic to a fault and genuinely just contributes her opinion which will either strengthen someone else's side or be such an unhinged take that both hardison and eliot are wrenched out of their bickering bc now they have to deal with that.

eliot will often say that he definitely isn't getting involved in any parker/hardison squabble but in the end he obviously can't help it. when he's in the mood to wind hardison up he'll take parker's side on principle but he also has genuine opinions he finds Very Important on all kinds of inane things and is extremely intense about it.

hardison is a little shit who more often than not just wants to see that vein in eliot's forehead twitch bUT see above: parker has some wild views and also she loves cgi yoda so to keep them all on their toes there will be times where other things (like being right about star wars) just take precedence.

[sweetsaladpainterranch]

The Rival (Chapter 2)

(Summary: Alastor sought to possess one of the only does in Pentagram City for the rut season, however, you wanted a mate, not a master. But what happens when a handsome new buck shows up one day and tries to capture your attention away from the Radio Demon. Who will you choose?)

Hey, so here is part two as promised (I rewrote it like 40 times 😅) please continue keep in mind that it's just practice for a beginner's writing class

***

Alastor POV

GOD, DAMN HIM ALL OVER AGAIN! How dare this bastard come into HIS territory and make eyes at HIS adorable doe. And how could Charlie, the naïve ninny, allow this…this interloper into their hotel as a guest? Going as far as to prevent him from watering the front lawn with the other male’s blood (and perhaps impaling his head on the entrance gate) in warning for any other foolish would-be usurper. He felt that the spice garden could use some Canadian reindeer mulch.

 Alastor couldn’t help but feel he was behind the eight ball thanks to his agreement with the Princess to not lay a finger on any who sought the hotel’s services; however, she even placed the rake next to your room. It seemed like she expected you to show him around and ensure he acclimated to the new environment without issue. To be a friend to this new guest. Was there no end to Charlie’s flagrant disrespect?!

You had had to walk him down to breakfast once because he had gotten “lost” in the hallways and ended up “accidentally” darkening your door asking for assistance. However Alastor knew it was intentional on the misguided reindeer’s part. It was as if James thought he could capture your heart within the span of a five-minute walk to the lobby. Nonsense. But, Alastor noticed how you sported a slight blush when you rejoined the others, with the newest guest in tow by the hand, in response to whatever inane attempt at charm he had thrown your way.

If the flannel fiend wished for a duel, Alastor would gladly oblige.

He had made certain that his precious doe’s hotel door frame was properly marked with scoring from his antlers and his shadow insisted on being posted on guard at night in case of any “lost” reindeer. This didn’t seem to bother you, as your instincts most likely told you to let the males fight it out, so he continued his pissing contest. For instance, no matter where you were, so was Alastor. He continuously shirked his hotel duties in favor of gluing himself to you and if he wasn’t (very publicly) rubbing against your neck or hair to leave traces of his heavy musk, and attempting to jump-start your heat with his pheromones, he was feeding you from the same plate as himself or whispering sweet words into your sensitive ears.

Oh yes, he saw with satisfaction how your ears twitched in contact with his warm breath and how you shivered slightly at his honeyed words of love. He also didn’t miss the glare that the Canadian continuously shot towards him, and aimed a shit-eating grin of his own right back, as you once again unconsciously relaxed into Alastor’s side.

***

Oh yes, The Radio Demon was absolutely certain that HIS doe would choose HIM as the superior mating option like she did every season over the trash that begged for a mere glance from her direction. HE was the one who always provided protection for her during this fragile time. HE always saw to her meals and ensured her nutrition as is the responsibility of the courting male. And HE was the one who you harbored romantic feelings for.

…Those same warm feelings that slept within him as well…

Alastor tried to shut the thought down before his mind strangled itself in a black cloud of doubt. To say that he was wholly unfamiliar with genuine romance, even throughout his many decades in Hell, was an understatement.

He huffed heavily through his nose.

Carmilla better have a good reason for dragging him away from his territory at such a time. As he begrudgingly made his way to the overlord meeting, Couldn't look weak during a season now could he? Alastor reflected on the last time he had allowed his heart to open itself for another long ago. It ended in his technological "friend" nearly voiding him to make a quick buck.

 …Never again…

 It certainly didn’t help his mood that the start of the rut season was ever hot on Alastor’s heels, but he could only wait for his pheromones to trigger his doe’s heat so every second away from you felt frustratingly wasted. He wondered if your body was taking longer than usual in response to the multiple suitors.

…What if she’s with him…

He shook his head as if trying to forcefully repel the vision of you accepting the other male’s advances. Laughing at James’s crude sense of humor turning into allowing him to drift ever closer to you and eventually seizing his chance to- no, his doe would never betray him.

...She's not mine...

It felt like a stone had settled in the pit of Alastor’s stomach at the thought of you being moved even emotionally by another. Ok fine! He was not the most romantically inclined during the rest of the year, but it wasn’t like you weren’t well aware of this relationship's transaction.

…What if she throws me away too?...

Alastor’s grip nearly broke his cane in half, but he didn’t notice in his shock at such an intrusive thought. She’d never reject him. He remembered how it felt like the whole of Hell suddenly stopped spinning the moment he found you hunched and bloody from defending yourself after an entire herd of bucks had stalked and cornered you in an alleyway. He normally never went out during a rut (can’t let anyone see his body’s weakness) but, even from the hotel, he had smelled something too alluring to ignore. A doe in heat.

Alastor thought you were magnificent in your demon form; legs bent like an actual cervid, claws sharp as knives, and covered in the blood of those filthy bucks who tried to take you by force. Even now the image continues to take his breath away.  

…I know her heart needs more…what if I …

No, that is not what this agreement is. You used him and he used you. Just like every other lost soul in Hell, you were leveraging your Satan-given circumstance to better your situation under his powerful allowances. Romance was merely a tool at best and a distraction at worst (Alastor tried to convince himself).

…What if her body chooses the other male’s pheromones…

He stopped dead in his tracks, just a short distance from the Carmine compound, as the surrounding windows shattered, and nearby demons fled from the intensity of his sudden static outburst. He felt his antlers grow and his bones shift in the fury that overcame him at the image of you held under the other man. Keening and gasping James’s name in your desperation to find relief from your heat. A loud snarl escaped him. Dammit! He never should have left her!

…What if his name is on her lips right now??!...

 Alastor had never phased through the shadows so fast in his afterlife.

***

Your POV

The kiss ended as quickly as it had begun once you felt yourself suddenly pulled into a suffocating nothingness, you opened your eyes to see that James was being violently shaken around in the air like a ragdoll. Only then did the blood in your ears stop pounding long enough for you to hear the sharp screeching of a ruined record and the overwhelming sensation of staticky pinpricks uncomfortably all over your body. Your instincts kicked in and you immediately scanned the yard for the cause of the disruption though you already knew its source as Alastor’s shadow was winding around your body protectively, but also in a restraining manner.

Your eyes searched for Alastor and found him, standing in between you and the flailing reindeer, to be almost unrecognizable in the most demonic appearance you have ever seen him and it broke your heart. Shit, he must have seen James kiss you and maybe even heard what you two had discussed. His body was completely stretched out and bent at impossible angles as he laughed manically at his rough treatment of James and snarled wildly, “HOW DARE YOU LAY YOUR FILTHY HANDS ON MY MATE!!!!”.

“ALASTOR! STOP IT!”, you cried out in hopes of capturing his attention away from James, but it seemed as though your voice had only made things worse as Alastor flung his prey high into the air with another laugh before turning his attention towards you.

Heavy footsteps rumbled through the air as Alastor stomped towards you menacingly slow like a predator taking his sweet time in devouring its next meal and you pulled at his shadow with all you were worth to free yourself of its confining hold. “Please wait!”, you pleaded with the Radio Demon (this wasn’t Alastor anymore). Surely he was about to kill you just like every other demon who he felt had crossed him and their screams and lifeless eyes danced in your memory, but, until now, you had never felt fear of the same fate. You knew hot tears were pouring down your cheeks and you tried to look as small as possible as the giant deer finally made his way towards you with the most strained smile you had ever seen split his face. It seemed like the green stitches that lined the smile were about to pop and you saw the black void of The Radio Demon’s eyes that were pinpointed by fastmoving golden dials.

You could only continue to sob and whimper out pleas for your life, quickly losing your voice in desperation, as Alastor kneeled down and bent his neck to look into your eyes before growling fiercely in your face. It wasn’t really understandable, but it sounded like the accusation that you could see in his twisted face and your heart sank even further. Of course, he must be feeling betrayed and angry, however, he also looked a bit…hurt? It was only for a moment but you were sure of what you saw and it made you wonder if this was really because he felt mating competition from the other male. You couldn’t ponder this any further, though, because you were suddenly whisked away from the hold of Alastor’s shadow in a vice of muscled arms, a firm chest, and white fur.

The fuck?!

“GIVE HER BACK TO MEEE!!!!”, Alastor roared so loud that your ears began to bleed and tighten even further against your skull.

You were quickly placed onto the safety of the hotel’s nearby back porch and looked up to your new kidnapper, only for your mind to completely blank as you took in James’s transformed body and the eerily powerful aura that radiated from his very soul. He walked in a circling motion towards Alastor as the two sized each other up. James now had two sets of strong, bent deer-like legs that attached to the abdomen of, what you assumed to be, a huge reindeer. His humanoid torso connected to the deer body and his shoulders to his head was adorned with spikes of thick, black antlers that grew more massive and curved as they reached the crown of his hairline. You recognized this form.

Dude was a freaking cervitaur? Wait…are DxD characters actually real??!

You noticed that thin vines lined his antlers with small, colorful flowers growing on them and that with each powerful step he took new plants sprouted from the contact of his hooves with the ground. James’s expression was marred with a threatening look towards Alastor and he began to kick out his back legs into the dirt as he twisted his, now thicc neck, from side to side in a warning display of his impressive but deadly rack.

The Radio Demon didn’t back down, however, returning the gesture as he coiled his body before both demons sprinted directly at each other as two harsh cervid howls rang out through the air like a thunderclap.

***

I really hope that you liked reading this! I enjoyed focusing on Alastor's side of things and James's demon transformation that is actually inspired by a DxD character. The cervidtaur, though James's powers will differ a bit, I believe that the fight of the next part will show off how awesome of a character design it is. 😊(See the pic below) I think I spent like a week researching reindeer aggression signs and how to write in a dude's pov 😂

Taglist: I hope I did this right!

@Xalygatorx , @songbirdpond , @bitter-rabittt, @sakuraluna2468, @cinnamon-galaxies, @speedycoffeedelight, @diffidentphantom, @wtf-why-do-i-gotta-do-this, @eris-norwega, @anngray1369, @ladyadrasteia666, @wends, @prime-in-time-and-space, @supeersimpeer, @sirens-and-moonflowers, @type-ink, @fantasyhopperhea, @martinys-world, @apad-ravya, @galaxywolf3, @thoughfullovercreator, @Boogiemansbitch, @helluva-simper, @alastorsgirl48, @ohmylovewhereartthou-blog, @need-a-life-or-grass, @michi-keinz, @milkissesx, @ari42, @valerie-is-in-the-cupboard, @lil-glum, @amariskygal, @strawberryoverlord1893, @cherry-cola-100, @noellebellq, @lettuce-frog16, @junieshohoho, @phoephan-123, @dreamraven13

[divorceconnoisseur]

There's a beat of silence where they just stare at each other. Eddie's face wavers for a second before he snorts, running his hand down his face. "What are we even doing here, man?"

Steve falters, the inanity of the situation hitting him. "I, uh, I think we're about to actually fistfight over-- over who a bunch of 14-year-olds think is cooler."

Eddie considers that briefly, tapping his fingers against his mouth before nodding. "Yeah, okay, I've heard of worst causes. Dukes up, Harrington, let's go!" Eddie pushes up his sleeves and waves his fists in the air cartoonishly as he starts to circle Steve.

Steve laughs, following Eddie as he goes like a compass drawn north. "Oh yeah, man? To the death, right?"

"Of course. Is there any other kind of fight?" Eddie says, overly serious, and abruptly tackles Steve.

They wrestle for a moment, and it's playful and stupid, but it still takes Steve an embarrassingly short amount of time to get Eddie in a headlock.

"This is just sad, man," Steve teases as Eddie struggles. "Those guns just for show, then?"

"Oh shit oh shit not the hair please, please have mercy O King Steve," Eddie laughs breathlessly.

Steve considers it-- Eddie seems to take as much care in his hair as Steve does, and real respects real-- and in that moment of hesitation, Eddie hooks his leg around Steve's and pulls.

Steve yelps as Eddie cackles, dragging them both down into the grass.

He hits the ground with a choked gasp, breath knocked out of him, and he squints up at the sky, unsuccessfully trying to hold back a grin.

He turns his head to say something to Eddie but loses his breath a second time for a very different reason.

Eddie's still giggling to himself in little fits, winding down, and there's a lightness to him at this moment that Steve's never seen, only heard described by the kids pre-Vecna. Laughter suits Eddie Munson, much better than terror or guilt or seriousness, and Steve's suddenly aware that he would do anything in this moment to keep that surprised look of happiness on his face a second longer.

Eddie catches his eyes and turns his head toward him. He's got grass stuck in his hair, and Steve doesn't think before he reaches over.

It's soft. Softer than he was expecting. He's careful not to catch any of Eddie's hair as he pulls out the grass and ends up lingering longer than he means to, setting a curl back to rights before realizing that this is, like, maybe a little weird.

He jerks back, and the back of his hand brushes Eddie's cheek, which is-- which is--

Warm. Soft, too, but with the rough start to stubble, and the feeling of it lingers against his hand like a brand.

Eddie's eyes, dark and impossibly wide, watch him, quiet for once. He wets his lips before speaking, and Steve's eyes catch on that, too, before darting back up to Eddie's. Which, god, what even was that? Why-- why is he--?

"A draw, then," Eddie says, turning over onto his stomach and kicking up his feet, and the weird atmosphere vanishes like it never was. "You are a worthier opponent than I realized, Steve Harrington."

"Oh yeah?" Steve says, relieved and disappointed. "Well, you're not so bad yourself."

Eddie clicks his tongue and fans himself. "You're too kind."

Steve looks away, tracking the clouds passing overhead. "No, really. I know I haven't exactly been, y'know, the world's best welcoming committee-"

"Was pretty convinced you hated my guts, yup." Eddie agrees, nodding.

"I don't. I never did. You're just--" Steve wracks his brain, trying to fit a word to the squirming feeling in his chest that Eddie inspires. "You're really good, y'know?"

"I... don't know, actually." Eddie's voice goes flat, and when Steve turns back to look at him, he's looking at Steve like he's a live snake, or something else dangerous and close to his vulnerable bits.

"You're good with the kids. Good for the kids, too. God, Will's really opened up since he joined your dumb nerdfest. You're good with and to the girls, too, and Jonathan, and Argyle, and probably anyone else that crosses your path. You are, patently, a good dude."

Eddie's mouth opens and closes, but Steve barrels on, feeling electric and more than a little crazy. "And, and it's just-- I don't know, I just--"

"Harrington, if you're about to tell me you think I'm a better man than you, I will lose it," Eddie interrupts regardless, voice high and reedy. "I know you're being, like, genuine and honest right now, but I will laugh in your goddamn face-"

"No, it's not that."

"Okay, I know this directly contradicts what I just said, but the speed with which you said that... Ouch."

"No," Steve shakes his head, frustrated. "I didn't mean it like that. It's-- it's not a competition."

Eddie's eyebrows leap up. "It's not? I invite you to remember what we've spent the last few weeks on."

"That was just an excuse," He snaps his mouth closed the second the words leave his mouth.

"Excuse?" Eddie repeats slowly.

"I just. I don't know, man. Maybe," he swallows. "Maybe I just couldn't handle the thought of you being good to me."

"... Why not?" Eddie asks, eyes focused on him, open, not judging, and god, this is exactly what Steve was worried about.

Eddie looks at him, and Steve--

Kisses him. Can't really do anything else but kiss him.

And when Eddie, after the longest moment of Steve's life, starts kissing him back? It's like the answer to a question he hadn't realized he'd been asking.

Turns out it's not the kids' attention he'd wanted-- or not just the kids' attention, anyway.

When Eddie pulls back, lips red and wet, eyes dark and focused just on him, Steve knows he's finally won it.

[idkfitememate]

Hello!! I've been here since your first creation, Boar! Creator. And I'm thinking about something.

What about Squirrel! Creator 🐿️

Like, squirrels in Genshin really have no fear, all they think about are pinecones. Many times I approached them, but they didn't run away like other animals, they just stood there, near their pinecones.

So I imagine a character who has a hat, like Mona or Venti walking in the forest and a pinecone gets stuck in their hat. Then a squirrel followed them all day, leaving them confused, not knowing why the squirrel was following them. And what the worse was that the squirrel had no fear, they even followed them into the city!

Mona Encounter

૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა Pairings : Gn! Squirrel Reader x Mona

૮꒰ྀི��´ ᵕ `∩꒱ྀིა W.K. : 649

໒꒰ྀིᵔ ᵕ ᵔ ꒱ྀི১ Tags/CW&TW : fluff & crack

໒꒰ྀི˶˙Ⱉ˙˶꒱ྀིა Author’s note : Mmmmm big bushy tails the floofa :3

Future note: Mona has a house… not right now she don’t-

Mona was a woman of business.

Booming business?.. Admittedly no, but business nonetheless.

Spending her nights charting the stars and giving out fortunes to those brave enough to handle her sharp tongue, she was more than busy in her life, even if she was just barely getting by.

… Where does she keep all her astrology books, tools and otherwise when she has nowhere to stay? Up your ass that’s where.

One busy night of watching the stars in a forest had worn the poor girl down, and the grass was so soft, and the gently breeze that rustled the leaves was so nice and oh… she’s asleep.

So deep in sleep, she didn’t notice the pinecone that fell into her hat.

Nor did she notice the you who was perched on a branch above, salivating at the mere thought of that now slightly forbidden cone because it fell on a human, and you told yourself not to go near them, if not for self preservation than just to not interact with them.

It wasn’t as if you didn’t ever want to interact with them, it was an inane fear that something might happen so on so forth, especially since you found out that you were in SAGAU. Fuck that chance. Trees, apples and pinecones is enough for you.

But this… this chance… fuck it it was to much to bear. You jumped right on into the hat, curling around the beloved pinecone. Nothing else mattered now except the piney scent and the cold comforting darkness of this idiot’s hat.

Fuck yeah.

૮꒰づ˶• ༝ •˶꒱づ ˚ʚ ꒰⁐⁐⁐⁐୨🎂🍩🍰୧⁐⁐⁐⁐꒱ ɞ˚

When morning came, Mona opened her eyes with a groan and popped her back considering the awful position she slept in. She blinked blearily as she took in the morning air. Feeling around, she grabbed her hat that had fallen off her head, not even noticing the extra weight, and plopped that sucker right on her head, somehow not even feeling your tiny little shivering feet.

Oh shit you fell asleep in her hat and now she was standing up. You sat as physically still as you could as you felt the somehow oblivious woman rose and begin walking.

The swaying motions wasn’t very nice on your stomach, ears twitching and eyes constantly moving around the space to try and find any kind of exit.

For a moment everything stopped, and your tail hitched and breath stilled. Suddenly, a hand reached up into the hat and in a panic you lightly jumped onto the fabric of the back of the hat, staring as the hand scratched the spot you once were and reach around a bit, finding the pinecone you once held and threw it out the hat, muttering some random stuff that was muffled to your ears.

After a few moments of stillness the astronomer was on the move again. And you were in her hat. Trapped. Alone.

૮꒰づ˶• ༝ •˶꒱づ ˚ʚ ꒰⁐⁐⁐⁐୨🍡🍮🍪୧⁐⁐⁐⁐꒱ ɞ˚

City noises were weird when you’re hearing them from inside a hat.

That was your deduction as Mona walked through what you could only assume to be Mondstadt. The hustle and bustle and overall joyfulness permeated even the fabric of the hat you were currently trapped in and made life just the slightest bit brighter, shocker.

Mona was just walking around as far as you could tell, no real destination in mind. But, you were hoping for her to stop soon, your paws hurt a little bit from their harsh grip on her hat and wanted a rest. Issue being, of course, you couldn’t rest on her because then she’d find out you were on her head for Archons knows how long.

The space you inhabited was just barely lit from the sun. The back of the hat behind you moving around due to a slight wind.

As the woman you were riding on continued further into the city, the only thing you could think was:

“Oh Fuck.”

໒꒰ྀི˶˙Ⱉ˙˶꒱ྀིა Author’s note : I was writing this years old when I found out Genshin has squirrels-

Also yes I purposely left off like that for requests/future stuff to pick up on lmao I’m sorry-

[slipintobangtan]

Meet me in my office

Genre: Afab! reader x Heesung, smut,

Synopsis: after a one night stand with a handsome stranger you sneak away before he wakes up only to meet him again as your boss at your new job

Smut warnings: nipple sucking, pussy eating

Word count: 7.7k

Thank you @kyunlov for requesting part 2! 💕

____________________🩷____________________

When I woke up it was still dark, I found my phone on the floor with my dress in a crumpled ball. I checked the time, it read 4:30am. Right then I decided that last night would only be a one time thing because I’m still hurt from my ex dumping me a couple days prior. I slipped my dress back on, picked up my heels and tip toed my way to his front door, making sure to be quiet enough not to wake him. I didn’t leave my number and I gave him a fake name at the club, he’ll forget me eventually.

I walked to the nearest convenience store and ordered an uber home, turns out we didn’t live very from each other. I don’t come on this side of town very often, it’s for the more wealthy people so it’s not surprising I’ve never run into him before. As I’m heading home in the uber I noticed about 10 missed calls from Karina and almost 30 text messages. Shit I thought to myself, I got so caught up with him I had forgotten to tell her I was leaving the club. I send her a quick message telling her I’m alive and I’m sorry and that I will call her later, after she wakes up.

As soon as I opened my apartment door I was greeted by my little cat cocoa, named after the colour of her fur. I didn’t bother getting changed, I just dropped onto my bed. I was tired, not even getting under the covers, I grabbed a blanket I had left on my bed earlier and cuddled up to it. Drifting off to sleep.

I woke up to the sound of my phone ringing, without looking at the caller I answered it. It was Karina “where have you been?? I was worried sick last night, are you okay?” After apologising to her and explaining my night to her, she calmed down a little and asked “how hot was mystery guy?” I laughed and replied “oh course that’s what you want to know” she faked shock and giggled “what? you wouldn’t go home with just any random, he must have been really good looking” I smiled remembering how handsome he was. “He was inanely hot but that doesn’t matter, I’ll never see him again” I told her and that ended the conversation about him. She spoke again “well today you should relax, you’re starting that new job tomorrow right?” She reminded me I needed to get my clothes out of my wardrobe and ready for tomorrow. “Yes! speaking of, I’ve got to go get a few things ready for tomorrow, talk to you later” I got my clothes out and packed my lunch for tomorrow. I plan to spend the rest of the day in bed watching YouTube.

Tomorrow comes around and I’m now on my way to the office I will be working at. It’s on the wealthier side of town, my old car stands out like a sore thumb when I pull up in the car park. I walk into the building and head straight for the reception desk telling the lady behind the desk that I’m a new employee and don’t have a key pass yet. She asks for the floor I will be working on, I give her all my details and she tells me Sam, one of the senior employees I will be working with will be down shortly to bring me up. Sam uses his key pass to buzz me through the security gates and takes me up to our floor.

Once I’m in our section of the office Sam introduces me to everyone and says “you’ll be sitting next to Lily, he motions with his hand to an empty desk next to a friendly looking girl. Lily smiles at me “if you need help, just ask me” I thank her and asked her to show me how to do a few tasks assigned to me. By the time Lily has finished teaching me the ropes I hear the other girls in our team start excitedly whispering to each other. I looked over at them and ask them what’s happening, I want to be in on the gossip too. “The boss is here” they replied and I followed their eyes across the room to see the back of a man wearing a very expensive looking suit.

The second he turned his head I almost passed out in disbelief, it was the guy from the club. I saw Sam talking to him and then they made their way over to us. Sam spoke “Mr Heesung, this is our new employee y/n” Heesung looked over at me, he recognised my face straight away then looked confused for a split second. That’s when I remembered I gave him a fake name at the club. A small smirk appeared on his face then quickly disappeared as he reach out his hand to shake my own. He greeted me saying “nice to have you on the team y/n” putting slight emphasis on my name, thankfully no one seemed to notice. Letting go of my hand after holding on a little too long, he smiles over at the rest of the team and tells everyone one to have a great day. Before he leaves he stops and turns his head “y/n meet me in my office when you have a minute, I have a few things I need to discuss with you” I almost shrank into my seat.

After waiting a few minutes I made my way over to his office door, before entering I took a second to compose myself for what was to come. I knocked twice then heard a “come in” from the other side of the door.

As I walked in he told me to take a seat. He was sat behind his desk, his suit jacket now draped over the back of his chair. After I sat down he stood up and walked around his desk to stand behind me “So y/n” he used the fake name I gave him. I felt strong hands placed on my shoulders, he leaned down and whispered in my ear from behind me. “Is there anything you would like to tell me” he said in a low tone.

I stopped and thought for a second, this is my new workplace, I need to be somewhat professional. I started “Mr Heesung” he stopped me “Heesung is fine, we know each other better than that don’t we” he said, one side of his lips lifting up in a small smirk. I continued “okay Heesung, I’m sorry I gave you a fake name when we met, you were a stranger in a club” he stared at me, his eyes telling me to continue. “I didn’t think I would see you again, let alone run into you here of all places” he still didn’t look satisfied, slowly snaking his hands down my arms until his hands reach my own, he grabbed hold of each of my hands and leaned down into my ear again. “Is there anything else you would like to apologise for y/n” he said using my real name now.

A tiny gulp made its way down my throat “I’m sorry I left before you woke up” I answered him, he was quick to retort back “you remember now” he paused for a second and then continued “ I thought I would have to jog your memory” His lips now dangerously close to my neck, lightly brushing against my skin “that was very naughty of you y/n” he said turning my chair around so I was now facing him. He stood closer to me placing his hands on each arm of the chair I was sitting on “I think you should make it up to me” one of his hands reached up and gently l took hold of my chin. “Can you think of a way to do that” memories of the other night flashed in my head, I suddenly felt hot thinking about how good he felt that night.

Looking at him I lightly tugged on his suit tie bringing him closer to my face, the familiar smell of his cologne again pulling me in more. “Do your lips still taste like strawberry” he asked me, egging me on. I pulled his tie closer until our lips connected, like waves crashing into each other. With his hands now entwined in my hair I grabbed a handful of his dress shirt. I was still sitting down, he scooped me up by my thighs and carried me over to his desk, placing me on top of it. Remembering my weak spot, he started sucking on my neck hard and rough this time, I was sure he would leave a mark but I didn’t stop him. His sucks became lighter, his tongue leaving a wet trail towards my chest.

His hands started unbuttoning my dress shirt, taking longer than he would like to come undone, he ripped the last button off. My bra now on display, he pulled it down, gaining access to my bare chest. He ran his thumb over my nipple before taking my other breast into his mouth. Running his tongue over my nipple in circles, occasionally giving it a little nip with his teeth.

His hands moved to my skirt, hiking it and removing my panties. Then positioning me on the desk where he wanted me, my elbows wresting behind me as I leaned back further on his desk not worrying about the papers and pens I pushed aside. He took hold of my legs and placed them over his shoulders, peppering kisses all the way up my thighs until he reached my now wet pussy. Holding onto my thighs he slowly licked the entrance of my pussy almost teasing me, his warm wet tongue already driving me insane. He continued, pushing his tongue into my pussy until he was completely inside, finding his way to my clit with ease. I grabbed hold of his hair as I felt him flicking his tongue up and down, playing with my clit. My eyes rolled back in my head when he started sucking on it, the pleasure almost unbearable.

I know he could feel my legs slightly shaking, he could tell I was almost at my limit. But he pulled back before I could finish, stood up and took my chin between his thumb and index finger. I looked up at him in a daze from being edged like that. He looked at me and said “that is your punishment for being naughty y/n” I liked the way my named sounded coming out of his mouth. He fixed his suit tie back into place and gently pulled me down off of his desk. With a small smile he spoke again very composed. “That is all, you may leave my office now” I scrambled to put my clothes back on, hurriedly walking to his office door, making sure to cover the hickey on my neck with my hair, praying my lips don’t look swollen.

Once I made it back to my desk I calmly sat down and took a deep breath. Lily looks overs and stares at me for a second before asking “did you lose a button” I pretended to only just notice and reply “oh, it must have just fallen off” then turned to my desk and thought to myself, this is my first day here, how long will I last with him as my boss.

Link to part 1 -