#but learn to live im like. bro. bro. what the fuck

[spineless-lobster]

ALRIGHT LADS MERRY CHRISTMAS ITHACA SAGA’S OUT HERE ARE MY THOUGHTS

(Spoilers under cut of course)

1. The Challenge

PENELOPEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! RAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

NOT HER SEEING THE STORM ODY RELEASED AAAAAAAAAAAAA

I’LL BE HERE BUYING YOU TIME‼️🔥💪

OUGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ANNA ATE THE VOCALS SHE SOUNDS GORGEOUS!!!!!!!!!!!

I KNEW IT!!!!! I KNEW SHE’D BE SINGING “WAITINGGGGG” I KNEW IT IN MY HEART AND SOUL!!!!!!!!!!!

2. Hold Them Down

WHERE IS HE INDEED!!!!!!!!

Oughhhhhhhh ayron’s voice is making me FEEL things rn he makes it so hard to hate antinous 😭 (this sentiment will not be held for long)

“Hold him down ‘til the boy stops shaking” “only the ocean and I will know” okay idk if I’m insane or ovulating or something but like antinous is kind of a freak for telemachus like he’s a little too sensual about killing him idkkkkkkk

Okay okay now it is SUPER easy to hate antinous FUCK when he’s describing what he’ll do to penelope I got chills bro thank god he’s dead 😭

Again I HAVE to reiterate how AMAZING ayron’s vocals are in this song HE GIVES SUCH A GREAT PERFORMANCE!!!!!!!

3. Odysseus

Ohohohohooooo daddy’s home

The electric guitar that’s how you know you’re fucked

“I come back and find my palace desecrated, sacked like Troy” THE GASP I LET OUT AT THE NAME DROP!!!!! SICKENING!!!!!!

When he called telemachus “my boy” what if I started crying

“I. Have had. Enough.” CHILLS!!! CHILLS MOTHERFUCKER CHILLS!!!!!! ASKFJKSJFSKHFKSHDKFH WE HAVE WAITED SO LONG FOR THIS!!!!!!!!

THE ENSEMBLE SINGING “ODYSSEUS” IN POLYPHEMUS’ TUNE!!!!! HE’S THE BOSS NOW BITCHES!!!!!!!

“He’s aiming for the torches!��� JUST LIKE SCYLLA!!!!! ODY IS PULLING A SCYLLA!!!!!!!!!

“You don’t think I know my own palace? I built it.” STILL ONE OF THE HARDEST FUCKING LINES IN THE MUSICAL BRO THAT SHIT MAKES ME INSANE!!!!!! INSANEEEEE!!!!!!!!

OPEN ARMS MENTION!!!!!!! We are NOT greeting the world with opens arms lads it’s fucking over. I love the way odysseus says “no” without ANY hesitation, he’s so tired of this song and dance HE’S HAD IT!!!!

TELEMACHUS!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAYAYAYAYAYAYYAY!!!!!!!

I wasn’t expecting him to relish in the bloodshed like he does in the odyssey because that’s just not how he is in the musical but it’s nice that he at least tried to stop them! You go little wolf!

“Where is he?” Being used to refer to both odysseus and telemachus is killing me slowly

“My mercy has long since drowned. It died to bring me home.” AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

FUCK DUDE!!!!! THAT WHOLE SECTION IS A FUCKING BANGER JAY’S DELIVERY IS ABSOLUTELY INSANE I CAN FEEL THE RAGE IN MY BONES MAN THIS SHIT IS SO FUCKING AWESOME!!!!!!!!

The use of “drowned” is SO CLEARLY a reference to poseidon I’m going to throw up

The screaming. All I hear are screams…

Fuck dude… just… fuuuuckkkkkk

4. I Can’t Help But Wonder

I’ve daydreamed so much about the father-son reunion I’m gonna cry

Ough poor telemachus finally meets his father and he can only worry about if he’s worthy enough to live up to ody’s legacy. And THE FIRST thing ody does is tell him how strong he is FUCK ME DUDE 😭😭😭

“Used to say I’d make the storm clouds cry for you” obvious reference to his whole shebang with poseidon

“Used to say I’d capture the wind and sky for you” WINDBAG MENTION!!!!!!!!

“Held you in my arms prepared to die for you” something something I see you draw your final breath, something something get in the water, something something…

“My son, I’m finally home!” THE WAY YOU CAN TELL THEY’RE HUGGING HERE BECAUSE OF THE SWELL OF MUSIC ARE YOU KIDDING ME ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS RIGHT NOW????? OUGHOGOUOGOGOHOHGHHHHHH

THEY’RE HARMONIZING IM GOING TO SOB IM GOING TO COMMIT CRIMES!!!!!!!!!

ATHENA!!!!!!!!!

My god odysseus learning ruthlessness and athena learning empathy and then uniting and realizing that, while empathy should always come first, unfortunately the world we live in sometimes we have to use ruthlessness in order to survive. And the best we can do is foster future generations that hopefully will not have to go through the same terrible things we have. Ough…

“There’s this girl I have to see” I’m like 80% this is referencing that cut song where ody asks athena to help him court penelope… I hope I’m right because I’ll cry if I am

5. Would You Fall In Love With Me Again

I’m tweaking our rn btw in case you were wondering

The instrumentals are so beautiful I literally CANNOT

The door opening sound effect is so simple but so effective alisjfkshfkshdidjjd

Once again I need to express how much I truly believe the odyssey is a metaphor for ptsd and how it changes a person and the relationships they have

ODYSSEUS SINGING “WAITING” YOU HAVE TO STOP I CAN ONLY TAKE SO MUCH 😭

Fuck the chorus is so beautiful I don’t even know what to say about it I’m so overwhelmed with emotions. Ough. Just… odysseus on his knees begging to be loved the way he was, and penelope knowing her answer only if she can really trust the man in front of her. Fuck… what the hell…

The olive bed… THE OLIVE BED!!!!!!!!!!

Once again I need to emphasize how ETHEREAL anna’s voice is!!!!!!!

THE JUST A MAN INSTRUMENTALS JORGE YOU CANNOT DO THIS TO ME!!!! ITS NOT ALLOWED!!!! YOU CANT FUCKING DO THAT!!!!!!

They’re harmonizing… they’re singing “I love you” and they’re harmonizing… I. I need a moment… I just.. give me a second… please can I have some time to myself? I just really need to… die, I think…

The final words of epic being “I love you” I am literally going to end my own life ITS SO BEAUTIFUL

This song makes me want to rip out my still-beating heart and eat it bloody and raw. In like a good way!!!

shoutout to the only straight couple ever. I love you odypen…

And thus, our journessey comes to an end. It’s over but it’s not over and I think that’s the only comfort I have right now

Now do you’ll excuse me I’m going to go lay face down in a creek forever

[spectascopes]

my brain can fit so many bad ideas inside of it

[krogans-give-the-best-cuddles]

Reading the Orchid Thief and lemme say. So fascinating to see someone like. Try to come up with a Reason Why humans like orchids. Two chapters here in a row pretty much treating Orchid hobbyists and plant hobbyists in general like one would an entirely alien culture- and don't get me wrong I understand why to an extent. Trying to make this book marketable outside just plant circles and what have you. But some of the way the camera is angled here is just. Fascinating.

Like, she explains how there are so many unique ways orchids evolved, as an attempt to contextualize for a reader why people might go crazy for them in specific, and describes individual species unique mating strategies, and the inability of them to self pollinate- but while I think that context is interesting it doesn't explain a damn thing. For one thing, having an extremely specific mating strategy is not solely an Orchid thing- a LOT of plants do it like that. Lots are flexible but I would say a vast swath are not and require specific things. For another- apples also don't self fertilize, but you don't have hundreds of thousands of apple varietal collectors.

She discusses their beauty as a reason they're collected- I won't deny that being a factor for sure, plants that humans like the shape of have a tendency to get collected and overcollected all the time- but like. A lot of people collect things that are traditionally ugly or even smell bad- and if it was exclusively a shallow pursuit, no one would work as hard as is required for an insane amount of orchids.

Part of the reasons orchids in particular are popular has to do with colonization. I can't articulate it all myself bc I haven't done research- but a genus that largely exists in tropical regions, that became popular in the late 1800s, that, in order to get in homes, white men would travel to all sorts of regions to take plants out of to get in the home? That is gonna help it get more popular than tomato or apple varieties for sure. I'm sure she's gonna touch on this eventually, given that the story she's covering actually involves the Seminole nation so I'm not holding it against her.

I suppose I'm just fascinated by her approach so far as to trying to understand why anyone would. Work to grow something? Really like something? I mean she pretty explicitly states that she "wants to want something" as much as these people want their plants- describes hobby communities and the idea of like. Working a hobby into your schedule or having friends related to the hobby as a "religion". She's baffled by like. Putting time and energy into a hobby and gaining joy and community from it and is trying to like. Break down orchids into their component parts to understand what makes someone. Want to grow a plant? And get community out of a hobby?

I'm going to be charitable and not make presumptions that she doesn't know like. The concept of loneliness and therefore a longing for community. Or that on some level she must know what common signs of autism are (ignoring her having spent several paragraphs describing several different people with classic signs and symptoms and then settling on "weird"). But it makes me want to turn the camera lens around for a moment. What makes someone presume that it's Orchid "obsession" (the word hobby is rather rare in the book acrually) that is particularly strange or more obsessed than other obsessions? What makes one abstract others hobbies and interests as needing a solve while the ones you surely have seen all over and even participated in aren't worth that examination? The line between "normal" and "abnomal" is entirely one made by dominant society

So this is why hobbies and kink aren't so different in the way they're perceived-

Orchids are an obsession to this author, to be highlighted and examined, or a hobby, to most people. They get a noteworthy category because they are seen as atypical. Sports-watching, however, is like. Never discussed as hobby. Watching football, watching soccer. It's just normal. No one says "that's my hobby." Even if a guy had a room full of memorabilia he would be noted as a "team fan" not a hobbyist. Sports has been declared normative, so it's not really considered a hobby by anyone. Plants? Non normative, therefore the same exact behaviors will get you considered unusual and a hobbyist.

Kink is the same way. People who are attracted to women being interested in breasts is so assumed to be normal and natural that no one calls it a kink. Breasts, the fatty deposits intended for feeding young, are expected to be hidden bc this kink (which everyone refuses to call a kink or a fetish or what have you) is seen as so universal. It's seen as immutable fact that there is a sexual nature to them. Feet however? If someone's into that that's a kink or a fetish if you're feeling kind, an obsession that makes you strange and worthy of examination and explanation if you're not.

I'm not arguing for doing away with calling things hobbies or kinks- I'm actually advocating for calling more normative things those words actually- I think it's just helpful to see where the framing of something, the way in which we choose to examine it, also has a lot to say about that which we leave unexamined, and unnamed. Because we don't categorize the normal.

[kalashtars]

if I think abt the state of trans politics in the US for more than .2 seconds I start wanting to sob god I hate it here

[creepy-scrawl]

I forgot how fucking rude usamericans are like I was eating normally at the "restaurant" and a bunch of mormon missionaries came and did not greet. and whatever I shouldnt care that much but It fucking boiled my blood when everybody leaving or enetring would tell them "provecho" and they'll be like 🙄🙄🙄 and say nothing to them... Like idk what to tell ya. It is costumary here to greet and if you don't speak the language or more importantly don't care about the manners you can fuck off to your shit hole country omfg

I was this close to tell them "se dice gracias pinche gringo maricon☠️☠️☠️"

[coridallasmultipass]

Working on a fic still and laughing at these absolutely absurd conversations Bro and Dave have. But also lmao, Dennis from Game Bro with his broken thumb.

They're so fucking dramatic, and oh my god I just realized this probably makes zero sense at all, out of context. Idk how to convey how hilarious this moment is to me, without the miles of words written beforehand. I just need to laugh about it publically lol.

[fakeuwus]

MANEATER | SIM JAEYUN (M)

PAIRING: virgin!jake x yn (femreader)

SYNOPSIS: in which jake is tired of being a virgin and you're asked to help him out.

WARNINGS: smut so MDNI! vrignity loss, oral (m and f receiving), unprotected sex (be safe out there), creampie, riding, multiple orgasms, etc. cursing, words like slut/whore, BARELY PROOFREAD

WC: 5k, lowercase intended

MESSAGE FROM NIC: here it finally is!! (sorry for the delay) my first piece of smut,,, hope it's what everyone imagined 😁 (also tysm for 2k notes on the teaser ahh!!) big thank u to my stella, @karinasbaby for encouraging this fic, one of my biggest supporters ilysm. pls be kind as this is something new for me BUT feedback is super appreciated, tell me what u liked and didn't like! (respectfully) also reblogs would be nice as well so feel free to drop one. love u guys sm 🫶🏼

jake sim was a virgin. a pitiful, pitiful virgin. and it’s not like he was ugly. not even close to that. jake was an attractive guy, easy on the eyes. and his flirting? a real smooth talker he was.

it was as if 2000s chad michael murray possessed his very soul every single time he would chat up a girl at a party or in class. 

so why couldn't he ever close the deal? how did he find himself in a steamy makeout session one second and then the next the girl is storming out of the room in disgust. every. single. time.

oh yea, because he was a fucking virgin. a pitiful, pitiful virgin. 

it seemed like girls these days wanted a man in charge. someone who could help them live out their fifty shades of grey fantasies. jake would like to think he could do that for them but how could he ever learn if no one wanted to give him the time of day? what happened to the girls that would spread their legs for anything and anyone?

all jake needed was one chance. one chance to stick his dick in a hole and he can move on with his life. 

his friends didn't make it any better either. he was getting tired of hearing all about their wild sexcapades every week and having nothing to contribute to the conversation.

but they don’t intentionally leave him out or make him feel bad about his lack of experience. they even try getting him with their past hookups because you know, sharing is caring right? 

“dude no way you fumbled sora. she’s a real slut i was so sure she would let you hit,” sunghoon says as he’s unwrapping his sandwich then taking a bite. “bro i didn't fumble anything. it's the same shit every time, once i tell them im a virgin they dip,” jake responds while he steals sunghoon’s sandwich and takes a bite for himself.

sunghoon doesn't even argue, his best friend is clearly in distress and is need of some food. “she started ranting about how she doesnt “do” virgins because they get attached and she thinks im gonna become obsessed with her or something.”

“why do you even tell them you’re a virgin in the first place? if that's the issue why even say anything at all?” heeseung questions with a mouth full of the same sandwich that somehow now ended up in his hands.

“because if he cums in .2 seconds then the girls are gonna think he’s a bad fuck. there's no winning here.” jake nods in agreement with jay's statement as he watches jay snatch the sandwich from heeseung and finish it off.

this is what is so beautiful about their friendship. they share everything with each other, the main things being girls and food. unfortunately for jake, bites of food is all he gets.

—-----------------

“oh fuck!” jakes pants while bucking his hips forward. vision blurry, drool pooling around the corner of his mouth. he genuinely feels like his soul is leaving his body and he wasn’t sure this was even real life anymore. to ground himself and bring him back to reality, he tries looking around the room to find something to distract him.

he doesn’t want to cum embarrassingly fast and he does NOT want to be seen as a bad fuck. out of the corner of his eye he spots a baby yoda squishmallow in the corner of the room, its sparkly eyes watching jake get his dick sucked for the first time.

it’s kind of weird but he finds comfort in the plushie and focuses on it to keep him from fucking exploding. 

now you might be wondering how he got here. in a hot girl’s room getting what he swears is the best head in his life (not that he has anything to compare it to.) the answer is jay, his best friend in the entire world who he now owes his first born to. 

“her name’s yn. just text her and ask when she wants to meet. i told her you were a virgin already so don’t worry about that,” jay explains as he’s scrolling through your profile showing jake what you look like.

silky, flowy hair, curves to die for. to say you’re gorgeous would be an understatement. the whole ordeal seemed too good to be true.

“she wants to fuck me? even after hearing i’m a virgin?” jake asks after grabbing his milk tea from the counter and walking towards a table.

jay simply nods and throws a look towards sunghoon, signaling him to explain the rest as they all take a seat. “yea that’s kind of her thing. she loves virgins. like, her body count consists of only virgins.”

jake was perplexed by the situation. surely he’d hear about a beautiful woman who only drops her panties for inexperienced guys roaming their campus.

heeseung then speaks up, as if reading jake’s mind, “she goes to the college in the next town over. around a 20 minute drive.” before continuing his sentence he shifts his eyes towards jay and sunghoon. eyeballs darting back and forth.

some unspoken dialogue is happening between the three as they sip their sweet drinks and jake just has to sit there and watch. minutes go by and jay clears his throat and sighs, finally breaking the silence.

“she uh, actually took all of our virginities back in high school. that’s how we know her.” 

pause. the fuck? he knew his friends all have gotten their dicks wet for the same girl before but at the same time? jake couldn’t believe what he was hearing. i mean, he did only just meet them three years ago, whatever they were up to before then he can’t judge.

he supposes desperate times call for desperate measures, and jake is sure he would’ve ended up in the same situation soon if they weren’t handing you on a silver platter to him.

“so… you guys had a foursome for your first times??”

heeseung instantly chokes on his boba as jake’s arm receives a punch from jay. a faint giggle is heard from sunghoon, “this bitch is choking on some balls.”

ignoring heeseung’s dramatics jay clarifies, “no you idiot, she took all of our virginities separately. we weren’t as desperate as you were.”

“and like, that pussy is so heavenly. i’d be pissed having to share her with another guy at the same time.” 

“roger that, brother.”

jake looks towards the two, sunghoon rubbing heeseung’s back trying to calm him down from his almost near death over some balls. 

“care to elaborate?” 

“man why do you think we’re all sex crazed freaks? her pussy’s got some voodoo magic in it or something. our manhood didn’t begin when we watched porn for the first time together, it started with her,” jay pauses and shifts in his seat, slight discomfort in his lower region.

he looks up and pinches his nose, “fuck i’m getting hard just thinking about it.” sneaking a peek at jay’s lower half, jake can see his friend chubbing it up in his pants. nothing he’s never seen before honestly. 

but what he hadn't seen before was how his friends were reminiscing so hard on a hook up the way they were right now. and the fact that their origin story of discovering their high libidos is all because of you? he was scared shitless of what he was about to get himself into.

-------------------

fast forward to some exchanged texts between you guys, jake found himself in your room with his pants around his ankles getting the life sucked out of him.

he quickly discovered you were very straightforward and to the point, immediately sending him your apartment address and what time to show up.

jake couldn’t argue though, all this talk about how you were gonna “change his life” and shit got him real worked up. he appreciated the fact that you skipped the small talk and went straight for his dick.

upon arriving and stepping into your living space, your lips smashed onto his and he was pushed down onto the bed. no hi, no hello. just your lucious, full lips swapping spit with his.

his hands instinctively flew to your waist, his digits gripping your plush skin as you straddle him. jake felt so in his element in the moment. making out? this is where he excels. he could do this all day if he could.

but he was here on a mission and he’ll be damned if he leaves without fucking you. or you fucking him. he was honestly down for whatever. you could ask to peg him and he would say yes.

you can sense his impatience, his face twisting in pleasure trying to savor every moment while the cogs are turning in his head, awaiting your next move. every squeeze he gave signaled that he wanted to get things moving.

you make your way down his body, peppering kisses any and everywhere leaving his skin burning. jake couldn’t believe what was about to happen.

in less than a minute he was about to get his first blowjob ever. what does he do? where do his hands go? what if he chokes you? what if he passes out from the stimulation?

before he can think of anymore what to do’s and what if’s, your mouth is on his dick and jake is seeing stars, figuratively and literally. he takes note of the little ones taped to your ceiling and thinks it’s cute.

the pink walls and plushies surrounding the two of you is such a stark contrast to your personality, or what little jake knows of you. but hey, he likes a woman with some duality to her.

“you can put your hands in my hair.”

jake finally takes a look down at you. pupils blown out, lips a bit swollen from all the sucking. you looked so, so pretty like this. he can only imagine what you look like with his cock in you.

trembling hands grab at your hair, slightly pushing you further down and a gagging noise emerges from the back of your throat. oh shit. your nose is practically meeting his pelvic bone and you aren’t letting up.

fuck it, jake thinks to himself. he was done with being patient. he starts fucking up into your mouth relentlessly, chasing the orgasm he was delaying. and you just let him.

you’re merely a hole for him in this moment and you could care less. his dick may be average in size but the girthiness of it was so delicious, you couldn’t get enough.

to make sure he reaches his high, you reach for his balls and start playing with them. his erratic thrusts combined with you squeezing his genitals he twitches in your mouth and his cum is shooting out, pooling out the sides of your lips.

and you don’t stop there. you keep going and going and jake actually feels like he’s going to pass out. “okay, okay please please!” you swallow everything he gave you and finally let him go with a pop to come up for air.

you get up and see him lying there on your bed, unmoving. eyes closed and mouth agape barely taking breaths. one might think he’s dead but this was typical.

once a guy gets to cum in a girl’s mouth for the first time they don’t know what to do with themselves. nudging him with your knee he breaks out of his trance with a lopsided smile adorning his face. god he’s adorable.

before you can suggest a break he immediately grabs you by the hips and flips you onto your back. your shorts go flying onto the floor behind him and he spreads your legs wide to prop them onto his shoulders.

his tongue immediately attaches to your clit and he starts licking you all over. slurping and sucking, as if this was his last meal on earth. he was desperate to get you to cum the way you made him and it was showing.

jake’s eating you out a little too expertly to your liking, as if he’s done this a million times. you won’t judge if he has, you’re literally the last person to judge someone’s sexual history but how is he still a virgin if he eats pussy this good?

he must’ve been met with horrible women who just used him for his mouth and left him dry. you wouldn’t do that to him though, poor guy doesn’t deserve that.

he inserts two fingers into your hole while his mouth was still working your clit. jesus christ. you didn’t notice before but his fingers were so slender and long, reaching places your own didn’t. “am i doing okay? kind of my first time.”

oh? so this was his first time eating pussy. you simply give him a nod of approval, not being able to utter a word as he dives right back in.

in all of your sexual encounters, never has there been a guy so willing to return the favor. and the fact that you didn’t even have to ask? where the fuck did jay find a guy like this? was he aware his friend was a fucking certified munch?

determined to make sure you cum, jake inserts another finger and moves his fingers in an upward motion, trying to find your spot. at least that’s what wikihow told him how to do it.

the sound of your moans and the taste of your pussy on his tongue simply feel amazing and he feels like he could come alone like this. at this point you’re panting and riding his fingers and god it’s so hot. you’re so hot.

jake finds himself humping into the mattress, trying to aid his painful hard on he’s grown since going down on you.

his wrist begins to ache with how fast he’s pumping into you but he doesn’t give a fuck, he’ll do anything to see what you look like when you reach your high.

“oh god, i’m, i’m- ahhh!” you come undone onto his mouth and hand, lips forming an o shape with the most pornographic moan he’s ever heard and he silently releases his load along with you onto the bed.

jake makes sure every single drop of your delicious juices are all licked up, driving your oversensitivity.

“so? how was i?”

you take a look at his annoyingly cute face and he’s licking all over his fingers like a lollipop. cute. gaining some of your composure, your eyes spot a wet spot on your sheets.

“wait, did you…”

“oh. sorry about that. i couldn’t help it.” jake explains with a sheepish smile and a scratch behind his head. not only is this guy a munch but he came untouched while tongue fucking you. you weren’t even sure guys like him existed, like at all.

without speaking another word, you grab the back of his neck and smash your lips onto his. tasting yourself on him has you wet all over again and you both begin to undress each other.

you detach yourself to take your shirt off and he pauses to fully look at you, drinking in every inch of your body. hands grab at your boobs and he pinches a nipple, a small moan escaping your mouth.

your body was literally to die for, the pictures on your profile barely doing you justice. and to finally be able to feel all around your curves and give your boods and ass tight squeezes was a dream come true for jake.

(he may or may not have been jerking off to the few posts you have up, counting down the days of you guys finally meeting but you didn’t have to know that)

you also took a moment to admire his body. to say jake was sculpted like a fucking greek god was an understatement, sporting a six pack and biceps to die for. veins running all over his arms and hands.

deciding it’s finally time to do the deed, you switch positions and motion for him to lay on his back. “are you ready?”

“wait! what about a condom?”

“i’m clean and i know you are so…”

“right.”

you throw your legs over his waist, now straddling him with your vagina inches from his cock. “okay, take deep breaths. i’m gonna slowly go down alright?”

jake throws a thumbs up and eagerly nods. in a moment like this he doesn’t fail to be endearing. you could literally just eat him up with how cute he was. your pussy was about to anyway.

you lace your fingers with his and slowly lower yourself onto him. there’s some intimacy with your actions and jake finds comfort in your eyes, looking at him adoringly.

it was finally fucking happening and jake couldn’t believe it. he was about to become a man. and the fact that it was you taking his virginity, a gorgeous woman who doesn’t care that he’s inexperienced and lets him hit it raw. it's really all he can ask for.

once your walls are wrapped around his tip, jake’s a goner. the little sweet moment you two shared is thrown out the window and he starts bucking his hips up into you, hard and fast.

his hands find purchase on your hips and he’s gripping them so hard you're sure there will be bruises tomorrow. you wanted to start out slow as it is his first time but it seems his thrusting says otherwise.

you press your hands against his chest and begin to move rhythmically in sync with him. jake’s eyes immediately roll back and his breathing quickens.

his hands fall to his side and he lays lifeless beneath you, letting you take full control.

all he could do was stare at the spot where his dick entered you and it was making him even more hornier. he couldn’t tell where he ended and you began.

your wetness didn’t help anything either. the squelching sounds indicated that you were very much enjoying this as much as he was.

“fuck you feel so good baby,” jake moans. the pet name that slips past his lips and it doesn’t go unnoticed but you also don’t question it.

for some reason the simple word made your heart jump. guys always called things like babe or even whore when they really let loose.

those never got to your head, you know they couldn’t really control themselves in the moment and you let them have their fun.

but jake has been nothing but kind to you this whole time, like he knew you were doing him a service and not the other way around.

this only fueled your desire to ensure that his sure first time exceeded his expectations so upped your menstrations. you quickly changed your pace to grind forward, backwards, and in circles making sure his dick felt every inch of you.

jake’s mind was reeling, his breath caught in his throat. he feels as if his dick was about to fall off with the way you were moving.

your body leans forward and you begin to kiss at his neck, leaving hickeys everywhere. your hot breath near his ear sends him into overdrive, must be a sensitive spot of his he never knew he had, but also how could he have known?

his hands that were once gripping the sheets meet your ass and he starts to guide you up and down his cock. you both were about to reach your climaxes, your pussy clenching with every move.

“i’m- where? fuck! where do i cum?”

“inside. cum inside me please.”

inside?? his first time cumming from sex and you were gonna let him do it inside of you? jake swears you couldn’t be any more perfect than you are right now.

you knew you threw him for a loop and honestly yourself as well. pushing these thoughts towards the back of your head you start riding him aggressively, even faster than before. “fuck, jake i’m cumming!”

“me too baby oh my god!”

and there was that damn pet name again. it makes your heart leap out of your chest and sends you over the edge.

the knot in your stomach snaps and jake follows shortly after, his load shooting into you. it pools out of you and you don’t hesitate to swipe some up with a delicate finger and bring it to your mouth, mirroring his actions from earlier.

your eyes meet his fucked out ones and you smile down at him, admiring the masterpiece of lovebites you left all over him. his vision was a bit blurry but he catches the way your lips curled upward, flashing your pearly whites.

jake finds himself instantly becoming hard again, call him easy but when a pretty girl is smiling at him like that after fucking him, can you really blame him?

you move yourself off of him and jake was fully expecting you to kick him out now but instead you position yourself on all fours, your ass in the air inviting him in.

“fuck. you’re into anal?”

you turn your head sharply to look at him over your shoulder, raising an eyebrow to question what he just said. the look you give him says it all and jake takes the hint and positions himself behind you.

“can we try anal next time though?”

an exasperated sigh leaves your lips and you reach over to grab his dick, inserting him into you. “umph! okay sorry.”

upon entering your pussy, jake relishes in the feeling of it. being inside your heat again leaves him breathless for the nth time today.

in and out. in and out. he tries to match his breathing with his gradual strokes. his member is extra sensitive right now and he’s trying not to lose himself. the impatience he had earlier has now moved onto you so you decide to take matters into your own hands and start fucking back into him.

your ass is now meeting his hips and the sound of skin slapping echoes in your room along with your moans. jake’s body is flailing from the sudden impact but he grounds his hands around your waist and grips the shit out of you.

he notices bruises forming on your skin but he can’t for the life of him let go. oops. he’ll do his best to remember to apologize for them tomorrow.

when there’s a good pace between the two of you, you fling yourself upward, back meeting his chest and the new angle has him reaching spots he didn’t before.

you take one of his strong arms and place it around your neck, having him choke you as you ride him like there’s no tomorrow. jake’s brain begins to turn to mush and he feels like he’s even more turned on at the revelation of one of your kinks.

and at this point you’re fucking onto him so hard, so good, he didn’t want it to end. “shit. shit. i love your pussy so much baby.” jake whines into your ear, meaning every word he said.

is it crazy to say you love someone upon meeting them for the first time? well, their pussy. yea. maybe. but who gives a fuck.

he was a man possessed by you, by your pussy. in this moment he truly believed there was some voodoo magic going on down there and he was blessed to be experiencing it.

you clench at his words, and your heart flips once more, prompting you to draw him closer to you (if that was even remotely possible)

the closeness of your bodies creates another intimate moment shared, kisses stolen from one another, hands tangled in his hair.

“i’m close,” he whispers in your ear, his breath leaving tingles down your spine. the hushed whispers you exchange contrast the sporadic thrusting that’s happening.

determined to reach your second high of the day, you push jake onto his back and settle yourself onto your knees, continuing to bounce up and down on his cock.

“yea just like that baby, shit shit shit i’m cumming, i’m cumming!”

jake opens his eyes to watch the scene unfold before him and god was it something. your back arches as you take his cum in you once more and your screams fill his ears, signaling you orgasmed right after him.

this moment alone is better than porn itself, and jake savors every bit of it. there’s absolutely no way he can even bring himself to type “nsfw” in his twitter search bar ever again after this.

you hover yourself over him leaving just the tip inside before sliding right back down, pushing his seed back in while it gushes around his cock leaving jake wanting, no needing, a third round with you.

but to his dismay you roll yourself off of his body, landing on the mattress next to him.

“so… how do you feel?”

he releases a long exhale he didn’t know he was holding, “fantastic. 10/10 experience. would do it again.” you simply giggle at his response with a shake of your head, getting up to gather your clothes.

“wait! um, could we do this again?”

you playfully roll your eyes at him, leaving his question unanswered as you begin to dress yourself.

—-----------------

sat in his computer chair, jake is finding it difficult to finish this stupid ethics assignment. how is he supposed to argue about the death penalty when you straight up almost murdered him with your pussy less than 2 hours ago?

he’s sure his professor wouldn’t appreciate if he wrote that he doesn’t give a fuck about someone serving their punishment if the culprit was you, but honestly speaking he’d let you get away with just about anything. you were an angel sent from above to him who could do no wrong. 

the way your soft lips wrapped around his cock while your innocent (not) eyes bored into his soul. the way you licked and kissed every single inch of his body, leaving nothing left untouched. and god, the way you worked his dick? how was he supposed to move on from you??

you were an insatiable, sex-crazed goddess. a once in a lifetime experience he was so grateful to have. 

his thoughts are interrupted by a loud knocking at his door. two seconds later, jay trails into jake’s room followed by dumb and dumber, all of them having a snug look on their faces.

they make themselves comfortable before they get right into the interrogation. jay leans against the desk, sunghoon sits in the bean bag situated in the corner, and heeseung sprawls himself across the bed.

“so virgin, how was it?”

 “wasn’t i right about her pussy?” 

“where did she make you cum?” 

eyes rolling in the back of his head, jake takes a deep sigh before answering their questions. “one, i’m not a virgin anymore so stop calling me that. two, it was absolutely fucking amazing. literally would give up heaven for it. and three, she had me cum in her. twice.”

heeseung shoots up from his position, jaw dropped and eyes wide. “you came in her twice?!” the boys all share a bewildered expression on their faces, dramatic as always.

jake just shrugs at them, what? didn’t you usually let guys cum in you like the freak you were?

jay slaps his hands down on jake’s shoulders, aggressively turning the computer chair towards him. “jake. buddy. yn has two rules.” 

sunghoon suddenly appears on jay’s left, “one. you can’t cum in her. you can cum anywhere BUT inside of her.” 

heeseung follows and is now on jay’s right side, “and two. she doesn’t repeat fuck.”

immediately following this revelation there’s silence.  complete and utter silence.  the gazes they hold are intense and uninviting. as if they truly couldn’t believe you let their best friend who’s never felt the touch of a woman break one of your rules.

their eyes say it all, they love jake to death and are happy for him, like seriously happy and relieved he’s finally entered manhood. but really? none of them got to do what he did? what was so special about him?

you don’t even know the answer to those questions yourself. maybe it was the puppy eyes or his whiny moans that made you feel like you had him in the palm of your hands.

his eagerness to pleasure you but to also receive reminded you of the sole purpose of why you only go for virgins. they made you feel wanted while also letting you be in charge. call it selfishness but why can’t a girl have the best of both worlds? 

and you’d never admit it, but jake was one of the best fucks you’ve had in a while. he never tried to be someone he wasn’t, just authentically himself. a pitiful, pitiful virgin. and he was proud of it.

it was refreshing to fuck someone who didn’t have some sort of ego right after you were done with them. immediately bragging to everyone what you two did and acting like they could pull any girl as if you weren’t doing charity work for most of them. 

with all of this in mind, of course you let him cum in you. he was doing so well for you, how could you not reward him? had to let him do it twice to drive it home.

and seriously, what kind of guy gives you a tender, sweet goodbye kiss and thanks you for defiling him? you didn’t regret your decisions with him but they were definitely scaring you. 

never have you ever been this intimate with a guy, but jake was different. you felt it. and what you did next didn’t scare you as much as your recent choices with him.

*ping!*

the staredown between jake and his friends comes to a halt and he digs his phone out of his pocket to check it. sliding up, he sees the message appear on his screen:

you: are you free tomorrow?

he glances at his friends’ expectant eyes and throws them a smirk. looks like he gets to break that second rule of yours. 

© fakeuwus 2024 do not repost, translate, or plagiarize

TAGLIST: @alvojake @jaylaxies @ikeuverse @pprodsuga @criminalseung @slut4hee @wonuqrtz @sansluvr @juniorjuneper @hoonven @sunshine-skz @luvyouloser @cha0ticpisces @no-daddy-just-issues-148 @hoseokteardrop @jakehooni @minniejenseo @niniissus @capri-cuntz @simpjay @chansloverr @esloao @strawbrrycuteblog @enhaslxt @vveebee @sakanelli-afc @felixbrownies @yunjinswifee @bobaikeu @minaateez @river-demon-slayer @sjylouvre @nyxtwixx @wonderlandless @eddieeddiesblog @moon4moony @skzenhalove @na-x2 @binniesbabe @monstaxdirtywonk @lauover @iheartjayke @jwsflower @notevenheretbh1 @rik1zzluv @ang0308 @kpopaussieline @jaehyuniewifeu

[mrfoox]

Oliver freaking tf out when im crying as we talk is an favorite thing

[zombvic]

KISSES TO MY EXES (joão félix x reader)

summary : in which y/n & joão soft launch their relationship as a response to their exes dating rumors

face claim : alexandra saint mleux (shes so gorgeous brooo)

notes : this idea came to me in a vision tbh like its so stupid im actually crying but hope you enjoy it. also no hate to magui shes so fine n stuff js her personality is irking me out xx

pairings : joão félix x ex!norris!reader , smau

It's safe to say both of them were screwed over by the two people who were now rumored to be dating.

Y/N L/N became a prominent figure in the sports industry even before she started dating the McLaren driver. She gained recognition in the Formula One community as Lando Norris's girlfriend. However, after their breakup, she became known as the one who was dumped by Lando Norris—in a good way, though.

She used the publicity of being dumped to her advantage. Instead of sobbing over the breakup initiated by Lando, she became the best version of herself.

João Félix, on the other hand, took his "breakup" as a challenge. A challenge to see how many times he could get fucked over by the same girl. The Portuguese actress and model, Magui Corceiro, was like meth to him. He couldn't stop going back to her; he didn't even try to stop himself. People say that "third time's the charm." Well, for João, it was the fourth. After she fucked him over for the fourth time, he decided he was going to start his villain arc (breaking up with her).

João's transfer to Barcelona came with much more than just a new club and a new country to discover; it also brought a new relationship.

The two had bonded over their recent relationship endings and on a personal level, they were a match. As months went by, their bond grew until it turned into an actual relationship. As of June 2024, they had been together for about five months, agreeing to keep it low-key. However, the moment they saw their exes link up they decided to reveal it piece by piece.

Liked by alliseeissainz, ynspookie & 85,725 others.

formulagossip uh, oh !! ex-wag / wag gossip here !! the ex-girlfriend of lando norris, y/n l/n, had attended a wimbledon match whilst her ex-boyfriend (lando) was there with his current girlfriend (?), magui corceiro. they havent interacted at all but neither of the three seem excited about meeting eachother here.

View all 247 comments.

user oh shit

user bro downgraded (personality wise)

user slamming my head against the wall

user lando when will you learn

- user both magui and lando r red flags ..

user wonder if shes gonna cheat on him too ..

user lando x magui seem very pr-like

user doesnt magui follow y/n on instagram

user their relationship seems fun..!

user not a smile in sight

- user y/n is mewing 🤫🧏

Liked by land0sgf, smoothoperator.com & 55,725 others.

formulagossip even more ex-wag gossip! it looks like the ex girlfriend of lando norris, y/n l/n, has arrived at the spanish grand prix. she lives in barcelona and is a long time formula one fan. she got invited by the ferrari f1 team to their garage 👀👀

View all 763 comments.

user are we about to witness a ynlando reunion .

user noooo y/n run outta there

user she looks so gorgeous.. landos loss

user why would she be there for lando, cmon guys be so fr

user her outfits always eat

user shes so fine guys helppppp

user L LANDOOOO

user poor lando, has to see whats he missing out on

user post break up glow !!!

- user more like new relationship glow .

Liked by yourusername, lecleaire & 43,384 others.

formulagossip wave of exes this weekend 👀 joão félix (portuguese fc barcelona player) also known as the ex-boyfriend of magui corceiro was spotted at the red bull garage.

user damnnnn

user guys i lowkey ship joao and y/n

user y/n, lando, joao but no magui..

- user lmaoooo literally we need her here to connect them

user y/n liked ??????????????

user WHY IS NO-ONE TALKING ABOUT Y/N LIKING THIS POST

user i get u y/n

user ooooh she likes barca players

user chat i need him

user f1 & barca.. my two worlds colliding

user a smell a new couple

- user if delusional was a person:

Liked by joaowow, barcafangirl69 & 25,856 others.

formulagossip y/n y/l, ex-girlfriend of lando norris liked our post regarding the portuguese fc barcelona player. the two have been following eachother for a few months and even spotted at some events together (via a fan who messaged to us!)

user 🚢🚢🚢

user chaaaaat i ship..

user the upgrade is wild

user i wouldnt be surprised if theyre dating tbh

- user they match eachothers vibe

user barca fangirl x barca player who ???

user ooooh i fear i like this

user girlie is gonna be the ultimate wag

Liked by joaofelix79, landonorris & 2,125,856 others.

yourusername hot summer nights

user joao AND lando in the likes !?!?!?!?!? thats craaazy

user magui caught shaking

user shes so lana coded

user this is so unfunny i need her like actually

- user joao on a second account is that you ??

francisca.cgomes beautiful !!

- yourusername says YOU

- user aint that maguis bestfriend ...

landonorris 😍

- user brother ..

Liked by joaoswifeyyy, yourusername & 1,055,682 others.

joaofelix79 summer 💆🏽‍♂️☀️

user this pic got me pregnant

user woof woof

user y/n liked !!

user not to be dramatic but i think i’m dead

user the kids miss you

user who took the picture ...

user those biceps ...... rawr

user magui missing ouuuuut

Liked by joaofelix79, landonorris & 3,001,885 others.

yourusername bit of this and that

francisca.cgomes #needthat

- yourusername #comengetit

- pierregasly what the fuck .

- pierregasly im telling your boyfriend

- yourusername fyi i read that in a french accent

- pierregasly much needed fyi .. thanks.

- yourusername what was that?? sorry i dont speak croissant

- user BOYFRIEND ?????

user mother is mothering

user wifey, are you cheating on me?

user who's that MAN.

user guys that's me please respect our privacy!!

user i think it's lando tbh..

- user get a grip

user dont ask me how i know this but those are definetly joaos hands

user the aestheticness is so visually pleasing xx

joaofelix79 posted a new story.

(translation : adorable)

Liked by stanloona123, francisca.cgomes & 103,685 others.

formulagossip former wag of lando norris, y/n y/l, is seemingly soft launching her relationship with the portuguese football player, joão félix. the two have been interacting both on and off social media for a while now and its not surprising theres possible romance going on !! y/n posted a picture of a pair of hands which match another picture of joaos hands. it also appears joao updated his instagram story with a picture of y/ns dog. what do you guys think?

user FINALLY . A HAPPY ENDING FOR THEM

user ahhhh thats so cute

user kika likeeeeeeed

user im so happy for them if theyre together

user ive been waiting for this moment

user beyond excited rn

user what the sigma im so happy

user ughhhhhh me when

user blud learned his lesson

Liked by ynsgirlfr1end, yourusername & 2,875,974 others.

joaofelix79 rio de janeiro🤍😍

user THATS Y/NS DOG

user he hay sports

user my mannnnnn

- user hey girlie...

user did y/n take that picture 👀 👀

user looking good

- user its the girlfriend effect

user WOOOF WOOF

user i wonder how y/n feels about the comments

Liked by joaofelix79, francisca.cgomes & 4,214,824 others.

yourusername cats out the bag n stuff

francisca.cgomes AAAAAAAH FINALLY

francisca.cgomes y/n is still mine tho .

- joaofelix79 nuh uh .. ????

- francisca.cgomes YUH UHHHHHH

- pierregasly bruhhh ☹️☹️

- yourusername sorry mr baguette man

user IM SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW

user aaaaaaaaaaaaaah cuties

user anyone notice magui & lando have been quiet for a while

user talk about an upgrade

user anyone else find it funny that kika (maguis supposed best friend) is congratulating y/n for dating joao (maguis ex)

- user and not even a like for magui & lando

user i love the dynamic between pierre, joao, y/n & kika

user fav couple tbh

chattttttttt this is sillyyyyy but yeah hope u liked it xx

[misctf]

Hunting for City Boys

“Ah reckon they went this way!”

Scott could hear the heavy footsteps and thick southern drawl of his pursuers. His back was pressed against a tree and he did his best to control his breathing. How the fuck did it get this out of hand? It started with the damn car. Of all the places for their car to break down, it had to be in the middle of bumblefuck nowhere. No internet signal, no GPS, nothing. Prior to leaving, Scott asked Will to make sure the car was ready to go. And Will reassured him that his father’s fancy BMW was more than ready to handle the drive across the state. Of course, Will insisted they take a shortcut to make better time.  And for what? To get to the cabin before the rest of their frat bros? In hindsight, it wasn’t worth it.

“Oh, Ah see ’im! There he is!”

Scott felt his heart sink. Did they really see him? No... not him. Will. Scott heard Will cry out in pain, followed by a thud.

“Nice shot, Clay. Y’all wanna keep lookin’ fer the other fella?”

“Ah reckon we ought to git this one back to the house. The other fella won’t git too far.” Clay said, “Besides, we don’t want ’im wakin’ up before we get home.”

Scott could hear the engines of their four-wheelers rev up. And soon enough, they peeled away through the thick forest and back to wherever they came from. When Scott peered around the tree, he realized he was alone.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” Scott cursed, “This can’t be happening.”

He checked his phone again. No signal. He ran a hand through his matted light brown hair. The chase had left him worse for wear. His jeans were torn from running through the forest, while dirt and small cuts covered his hands. Even his white sweater was stained with mud. He quickly removed it, revealing a tight-fitting t-shirt that hugged his lean body nicely. He sighed. It would only be a matter of time before they started searching for him again. Those two fuckers. They came out of nowhere, driving on their stupid four wheeler. At first, Scott thought they were going to help them. It would’ve been clear to anyone that the two privileged, preppy frat guys had no idea what they were doing with the car. And despite Will being a straight As engineering major, his knowledge on car maintenance was lacking. As was Scott’s. Wasn’t like they ever really needed to learn anyway. But it was too late to worry about that now. Scott needed to figure how to get out of this mess.

“If they have a house,” Scott thought, “They might have a phone, or a car, or some way to get out of here.” He took a deep breath. He could follow the tracks of the four-wheeler back. But what happened if he got there and there were more of them? He sighed. He’d take the risk.

_______

Scott wasn’t sure how long he walked until he arrived at his destination. He spent some time hiding behind trees and bushes as his pursuers resumed their search for him. But somehow, he made it to the house undetected. Unlike the mansion his family occupied, this house (if Scott could even call it that) wasn’t much to look at. The home sits on a gravel path that winds through overgrown weeds and brambles, leading to a weathered structure that looks like it's been standing for decades. Its wooden siding is chipped and peeling, with patches of faded paint barely clinging to the surface. Scattered furniture and empty beer bottles littered the overgrown grass of the front yard.

“In and out. Find Will, find a phone, and bounce.” Scott whispered, his heart pounding in his chest. To the best of his knowledge, those fuckers were still patrolling the forest.

With a rush of adrenaline, Scott stealthily approached the front door. When he got inside, he gagged. The living room is a cluttered space with a mix of mismatched, well-worn furniture. An old plaid sofa, sagging in the middle, sits opposite a heavy wooden coffee table covered in a layer of grime and strewn with empty beer cans and fast-food wrappers. The walls are adorned with faded hunting trophies and old, family photos, framed in crooked, mismatched frames. A faint, smoky odor permeates the air, hinting at years of cigarettes smoked indoors, mingling with the pervasive smell of old wood and dust.

“Fucking pig sty.” Scott mumbled, maneuvering through the old home, “Come on, there has to be a phone or something.” But his search wasn’t all too successful, “Y’all can’t be serious, what kinda folks don’t got a phone?” Scott froze at the sound of the drawl leaving his lips “What the fuck?” He whispered, his voice returning to normal, “Shit, I’m losing it. Focus Scott.”

But there was no phone. Or car keys. Or even a radio. He took a deep breath, gagging more as the stale air filled his lungs.

“Alright, so I ain’t gonna be able to reach nobody. But where on Earth is Will?” This time, Scott barely registered the southern drawl that infected his words. Instead, he found himself focused on the basement stairwell. He gulped, “Maybe Will’s down there.” He whispered.

Scott started down the stairs. The smell that permeated his nose was more intense than the one upstairs. It caused the young man’s eyes to water and he felt like he needed to turn around to get fresh air. But Scott knew he needed to be quick. Find Will, get out of there. Head back the way they came until the got cell service. But his train of thought was shattered when he made it to the bottom of the stairwell.

“Will?” Scott asked, gazing at the figure restrained to the chair, “Oh god, Will?”

“Scott, that you?” The man said in a thick country accent, “Scott, come on now, you really gotta help me out here. Please, I’m beggin’ ya!”  

The man in the chair had very few similarities to Will. Or at least to the Will that Scott knew. Where Will’s toned abdominals once were, a small beer belly was jutting out. His stubble had darkened, while his dark locks had been shaved away and covered with a ball cap. His body hair was more obvious now, leaving him lightly dusted from head to toe.

“Will, good Lord, what in the world did they do to ya?” Scott’s mind raced when he realized he was once again speaking in a southern accent, “I cain't, for the life of me, stop talkin' like this! What in tarnation’s goin' on?” Scott’s hand shot to cover his mouth, but when he made contact with his newly grown stubble, he jumped.

“It’s happenin’ to you too, ain’t it? I reckon it is.” Will mused, “It’s the smell, I tell ya. Gets in your head and messes with ya a bit.”

Scott’s eyes widened in terror. And for the first time, he started to really understand his situation. As he looked down at his own body, he could see his stomach starting to push out into a small gut. Simultaneously, small hairs started to poke out from under his collar.

“No, that just ain’t possible.” Scott whispered in disbelief, “Will, we gotta get outta here, and right quick.” He ran over to his friend and began undoing the binds around his hands. All the while, Scott tried to ignore the itchiness of his new beard.

“I tried to put up a fight too, Scott. I reckon I did. But after spendin’ some time down here, I just went on and accepted it.” Will continued. Scott watched as his friend’s eyes dulled, “Ain’t no need for fancy degrees or gettin’ all dressed up. Just a good ol' nice, simple life."

“Will, listen here, you need to focus now.” Scott said, undoing the final bind, “There’s gotta be a way to fix this.” But Will shook his head and without a second thought, tackled Scott to the ground. Scott looked up at his friend in terror, trying to wriggle out from beneath his firm grasp, “Will! Lemme go, gosh darnit!”

“Well what do we have here?” Scott’s heart sank as he heard the voice of their pursuers flood the room, “Billy! What’re you doin’ strattlin’... Scott?” Clay shook his head, “Naw Scott ain’t a good name for a good ol’ southern boy, ain’t it?” He grinned, “We’ll think of somethin’ but go on now and finish the job, Billy!”

Scott’s eyes widened in terror as Billy nodded. And before Scott could stop it, he found his face in Billy’s rank armpit. The bush of moist pit hair tickled Scott’s nose, and the intensity of Billy’s country B.O. filled his nostrils. He wanted to yell out and beg them to stop, but when he opened his mouth, he only breathed in more of Billy’s stench. For poor Scott, it soon became unbearable. And as the laughter of his captors filled the air, Scott’s world went black.

_________

“We ain’t got all day, Billy!” Scott shouted from the driver’s side, “Git in the darn truck already.”

“Aww Cletus, I’m sure sorry. I went back for the gin.” Billy said, jumping into the passenger seat, “We got a long ride ahead of us.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Scott- now Cletus groaned, “Just don’t be tellin’ me about no new shortcuts. I ain’t too keen on goin’ through anything like this again.” He looked over at Billy, who was chugging the bottle of gin. He sighed, “I can’t stay mad at you though.” Sure, his upper class life was gone. And he could barely string together an intelligent sentence. His vocabulary was oversimplified and any education past the eighth grade was absent from his mind. Certainly, folks from his prior social circles wouldn’t tolerate his cigarette smoking, beer chugging, and crude jokes. Cletus sighed. His life as Scott was over, “Well, Billy, you ready?” His hand slowly wrapped around Billy’s cock and he gave it a few tugs. Billy moaned and bucked his hips, only for Cletus to stop, “I knew that’d get your attention. Besides, you got plenty more of that comin’, y’know. Especially if we go along with what Clay’s sayin’.”

Billy nodded, lifting his arm and taking a deep whiff, “Y’all think they’ll recognize us?” Cletus shook his head. There was no way their former frat bros would recognize them.

“Soon enough, they won’t even recognize their ownselves.” Cletus replied, taking a whiff of his own pits, “Now c’mon. We got a long drive ahead of us.”

[pshbites]

LOVE ON AiR: 34. chat is this a date yes or no?

WARNiNGS » profanity, food, riki menace, jungwon nosy, more ynhoon (not proofread)

wc: 1.6k

“i’m sure she won’t care if a couple things are out of place hoon” jay spoke, his voice echoing because jake doesn’t know how to turn off his wide spectrum on facetime. sunghoons phone was placed on his kitchen counter, whilst on a group call with heeseung, jake, and jay. “yeah but im not a messy person, ugh i don’t even know how the place got so dirty” sunghoon groaned, wiping down his stove countertop. 

he’s been cleaning up the house for about an hour now because he started getting paranoid about you being in his apartment for the first time. what if you didn’t want to talk to him because his place was messy, what if you left hating him. he could not have that happening which is why he was in his current state. 

“when did she say was on her way” heeseung said, dishes clanging on his end, causing jake to groan, “bro go on mute or something fuck.” “learn to use your phone dipshit” jay replied, rolling his eyes. “she texted me like 10 minutes ago she was on her way” sunghoon setting the rag in the cabinet under the sink and stepped back, for the most part his apartment was clean (not like it was dirty) everything was good. 

sunghoons phone buzzed and he rushed over, to see a text from you that you were coming up. “okay she’s coming up” he announced, looking at the camera. “good luck!” heeseung said, jake furrowed his brows “wait after she leaves can we play roblox” “no” “wait-“ sunghoon ended the call before jake could say anything else and set his phone down. 

the second he did, his doorbell buzzed. sunghoon walked towards the door and opened it, revealing you. before he could say anything, gaeul ran up, jumping around you. “oh hi baby, how are you?” you spoke in a baby like voice and sunghoons heart almost melted. you knelt down, petting gaeul. “she’s not usually like this” sunghoon spoke, watch you endearingly. “it’s okay” you murmured, picking up gaeul and standing up again. 

sunghoon smiled down at you, reaching over to pet gaeul. the two of you stood there for a couple seconds, just smiling like two love struck idiots. “do you want an apartment tour?” sunghoon cleared his throat, gesturing to the apartment. “yes of course, let me just take off my shoes” you replied, setting gaeul down. you slipped off your shoes and stood up straighter once again. “okay let’s go!” you clapped your hands, making sunghoon giggle. 

sunghoon led you all around his apartment, gaeul following behind you two as he showed you around. “and finally” he opened the door to his bedroom which looked like a very accurate representation of him. “this is so cozy” you glanced at him as if asking if you could go in and he nodded, the two of you going in. you looked around, your gaze falling on his shelf where there was so many pictures.  

“oh please don’t look at those, they’re embarrassing” sunghoon groaned, watching you grab one of the framed pictures. “aww you’re so cute in your little skates” you cooed, smiling at baby sunghoon. he reached for the picture form your hand but you turned around, your back facing him now. “look at you with your chubby cheeks” you cooed again, making sunghoon chuckle. “okay yn jokes over give me the picture” he reached once more but you dodged, grinning. 

“it’s not embarrassing, it’s adorable” you smiled, side eyeing him. “ynnn” he groaned once more, the smile stuck on his face. “fine fine” you handed him the picture, letting him put it back on the shelf. “your room is nice though, it’s like you” you smiled at him again, for some reason you really could not stop smiling with him. “thank you, now what movie did you wanna watch” you followed him out of his room and into the living room. 

“movies on netflix have gotten so bad though” you took a seat next to him on the couch, making him furrow his brows. “i don’t only have netflix, i have like everything” he reached for the remote and turned on the tv. you smiled seeing the multiple streaming apps, you were definitely telling kat and giselle this. “i think there’s a ton of new movies on amazon prime” sunghoon mumbled, clicking through the home page of prime. 

“oh i love that movie” you gasped, sunghoon scrolling back to the movie. “i’ve only seen it once, i can’t remember it though” sunghoon looked to you, you looked at him. “i’ll make popcorn?” he smiled, standing up and you frowned slightly, standing up and following him to the kitchen. “you don’t like popcorn” you spoke up, it was sunghoons turn to look at you weirdly now. “yeah but you do, there’s other snacks too yn don’t worry about me” he gave you a smile, turning around again to put the popcorn packet in the microwave. 

this all felt weirdly domestic to you, but not in a bad way. in a way that you felt like this would happen way more than once. like this felt like the norm now with sunghoon, but what was it all. you told him you liked and cared for him and he told you likewise but now what? was it just the weird phase where you both knew how each other felt but just didn’t know what to do. to be fair you weren’t complaining, it wasn’t like you were worried sunghoon would be talking to other people because it was clear to you he wasn’t like that. now it was just a matter of time of who would pop the impending question. 

“you’re awfully quiet, what are you thinking about?” sunghoon turned to look at you, breaking you out of your thoughts. you gave him a tight lipped smiled and shook your head, “nothing” sunghoon could see right through your white lie but he chose not to pry, maybe you just didn’t want to talk about it. 

he picked up the bowl of popcorn along with some other snacks and turned to you, the two of you softly giggling like children as you made your way back to the couch. sunghoon shut the lights and turned on the movie. then he took a seat next to you. 

you and sunghoon had cleared the snacks that were set on the table and now two movies were done. the two of you were sitting closer as well, somewhere around the middle of the second movie, sunghoon did the classic yawn and arm around shoulder move. safe to say it was a classic because it worked. his arm was now holding you, rubbing your back softly. your head was laid on his shoulder, watching as he clicked through the streaming app. 

you yawned, covering your mouth. sunghoon smiled softly, looking down at you. “tired?” he had this lopsided grin that always made your heart burst. you nodded, groaning. it was 10:45 pm, you told kat and giselle you’d be home by 10 because the three of you had plans tomorrow. “i don’t wanna leave” you whined, cuddling closer into sunghoons neck. he only laughed, rubbing your back. “i know but it’s late, and you said you had plans” he sighed out, a part of him didn’t want you to leave either. 

the two of you stayed in that position, until you sat up straighter. sunghoons hand was still on your back as he looked at you, smiling softly at your slightly disheveled state. you patted his cheek, signaling him to get up with you. “walk me to the parking garage?” you stood up from the couch, sunghoon looking up at you. “is that even a question pretty? c'mon let’s go” there it was, that nickname you so loved to hear. you shoved his shoulder lightly as you both made your way to the door, both putting your shoes on. 

“i had a lot of fun” you looked to sunghoon as you entered the elevator with him. he smiled, brushing some of the hair out of your face. even the slightest touch made your heart burst with pure happiness. “i did too pretty” he tilted his head, dimples on full display. your cheeks were sore from all the laughing and smiling. 

you exited the elevator, luckily your car was not too far from it. you shivered, rubbing your arms. without hesitation, sunghoon lifted his hoodie off of his body, handing it to you. “hoon my car is right there” you laughed, pushing the hoodie away but he pushed it into your arms. “it’s still cold out” you looked at him and then smiled softly. reluctantly, you put the hoodie over your head, letting the warmth and sunghoons scent engulf you. all sunghoon could do was smile. “drive safe okay? and text me when you get home” you nodded, opening the drivers seat door. “you know i will”

just before you got into your car, sunghoon stopped you and turned his head. you furrowed your brows then realized he was asking for a kiss. on the cheek. “you’re so annoying” you mumbled, pecking his cheek and leaning back. you loved how rosy his cheeks got. “now you can go” you laughed, shaking your head. you got in your car and sunghoon stepped back, waving as you drove off. 

sunghoon touched where you kissed his cheek and smiled, occasionally touching that specific side all the way up to his apartment and all the way to his bedroom. what was he going to do with you? 

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[very-d1pper]

inspired by a post from @jamandjazz

How Johnny Cade, Dallas Winston, and Steve Randle are affected by their parent issues.

ok so keep in mind i havent read the book since december (i dont have my own copy) so this might be a bit wrong. im using info from my mind, the movie, the musical, tiktok, and here.

Johnny Cade

so its canon that johnny wouldve ran away if it werent for the gang (starting off strong with dally-johnny parallels OUCH)

the abuse from his parents definitely gave him a fucked up sense on what it means to feel loved

which is why johnny gets along with dally so well, i'll get into that more in dally's part

he 100% thinks that the entire world hates him except for the gang

someone said that he is so sweet its sick, not true. the abuse definitely toughened him up enough that he will be mean to strangers

he canonically is somewhat responsible (going out to the store to buy supplies and giving ponyboy a note)

im saying that because im pretty sure pony says something like twobit and someone else in the gang would forget to buy something johnny remembered

johnny learned that from having to live out on the street sometimes when his parents fought or kicked him out for multiple days

he is the living definition of forgive but never forget

he just wants a home

i personally hc that the abuse started as johnny grew older, maybe when he was 6-8 years old

which is why johnny (especially in the musical) still cares about his parents

because he remembers that they WERE good people

and he hopes to bring them back eventually

Dallas Winston

oh this man...

ran away from his problems. thats canon

his mom died when she gave birth and thats why his dad is the alcoholic deadbeat abuser he is

the abuse from his parents gave him a fucked up sense on what it means to love

which is why he can talk to johnny so well because johnny is used to the type of love dally gives

he 100% hates the world except for the gang

the abuse toughened up both johnny and dally, the thing is dally grew up with it, johnny was raised with love at first

also dally's environment in ny, that place is rough in many areas

tulsa doesnt have that, at least not on the level of ny

he's rough with everyone because thats what he learned

Steve Randle

UGH THIS MAN BRO

screw u se hinton for giving us NOTHING abt him

anyways!!

the neglect sooo fucked him up

then his dad giving physical money for forgiveness?

hell nahhh

steve definitely felt like he cannot be loved without paying someone

like with real money

which made him feel unlovable because he's like broke as fuck

soda was the first person to show him what love actually is

his mom uhh eloped to wherever after steve's birth ig idfk

steve thinks everything in the world comes with a price, even an ounce of love

i literally cant think of shit for this man rn

All Three

accidentally trauma bonding

johnny mentioned something then both steve and dally said "same"

genuinely concerning from an outsider standpoint but really funny to them

if it was modern au darry or soda wouldve sent them to therapy

one time johnny got kicked out and went to the curtis house and found steve in the kitchen

j: "kicked out?"

s: "...yeah"

j: "same."

then dally walks in

d: "bottles got thrown at me in buck's place"

j: "ptsd?"

d: "no-" *remembers he's with two people who had it happen to them* "...yeah"

j and s- "its good."

johnny convinces them to do a cuddle blob thing (the gang's done them before)

darry wakes up and see them, doesnt comment but remembers for blackmail

[fortemelody]

AHHHSHFBTKFNTLFKGNFMDM SONIC 3 TRAILER SONIC 3 TRAILER SONIC 3 TRAILER IM LOOSING MY SHIT RN

here’s some things i noticed/wondered/loved:

- i think in that scene where tom is on the ground yelling for sonic, he is wearing a special forces suit. maybe he upgraded from cop to working with gun?? if so i think that’s a really good use of his character actually! he wanted to save a life and raise a family above all else yes, but he still got his previous dream of doing more serious cop work!

- shadow just. has a big ass portal?? like holy shit he’s just suckin the life outta earth and ig that’s one way to do it (or maybe it’s just a ring and i’m stupid idek)

- i’m sure we’ll learn more about this in the actual movie so i’m not too worried, but i’m super confused at the very beginning scene. apparently sonic didn’t change his heart…but he did tho? like he learned what being a true hero meant in the last movie. tbh i feel like that’s enough but hey i’m not against more character development for our boy so!! (also that bit where he’s like “in my lungs” was actually really funny to me, ben schwartz’ awesome delivery caught me off guard)

- GERALD ROBOTNIK ALIVE HUUUUH?! tbh i would’ve preferred if maria was alive, i feel like that would be an interesting dynamic. but also ig that would make it harder for shadow to learn anything so i totally get it. anyways i’m just glad they’re putting a little twist on the story, it keeps it interesting. they already sorta did that with the knuckles and iblis thing actually! (even if that show sucked ass and although that probably wasn’t intentional 😭)

- even tho bro only got like… 3 lines, i really think keanu fits shadow. he’s very soft spoken in comparison to the rest of the case which feels nice. also he’s like the “really bad” guy so ofc he’s not gonna be yappin on and on like sonic or robotnik and he’s gonna take things uber seriously.

- where was my girl maddie :( i think she was only in like a singular frame. hope shes in the movie a somewhat significant amount. i heart pretzel lady!! could live without wade tho like pls im so sick of his bowling soap opera 💀

- FAT ROBOTNIK FAT ROBOTNIK FAT ROBOTNIK!!! after fucking 3 movies they finally fulfilled jim carrey’s wishes!! let the man get creative like please i love jim carrey sm aughdfhfnfmschxj. also love how we got so much stobonik content within that short scene like jesus come get y’all’s food

- shadow at one point says something along the lines of “when we’re done, there won’t be anything left.” maybe i’m reading WAY to into this but what does the “we’re” part mean?? is he working with others? i feel like this is either gonna be team dark or some new movie exclusive character(s). edit: someone made a valid point that he’s actually probably referring to gerald (look at reblogs!)

-CHAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lowkey wonder if the room therye in is like an amusement park or somethin like that

- no sign of amy :( but honestly my prediction now is that she’s gonna be the post credit scene teaser cus they always do a new character reveal there. first tails, then shadow. and honestly now i think it might be better that way so shadow can have a chance to breathe and show his story in full. i’m pretty sure i vaguely remember colleen (tails’ VA) being kinda mysterious about amy’s appearance when asked, and also the fact that it was confirmed that this isn’t the end of the movie franchise/universe. but ig we’ll just have to wait and see!

so sorry i stated this yesterday morning to give my initial thoughts but then got busy and completely forgot to post/finish it. and today i started (and am close to finishing) a very long edit of the trailer, so be on the look out for that too!

genuinely i feel like this movie is gonna somehow be even more record breaking than any of the previous movies and i am so here for the hype 🙏

[briliantlymad]

Smth smth it's all about letting go but im not gonna lie I feel like wanting to write an anakin not going off the rails having a mental breakdown through palpatines manipulation. Palpy is like. I can teach you force techniques you don't know about and anakin is just like???? You're not a medical professional tho??? You don't have the force chancellor palpatine I think you've had too much wine tonight at the opera. Let's get you to bed.

But he's also not going to take any chances because if there is some force technique he's going to learn it himself. and instead of spending time with palpy he's searching up the jedi library and making his way through all kinds of other dubious sources. What's mastery over death if he's good enough at healing that it never gets to that point?

Council be like: Where's knight skywalker he's gotta go protect this planet with the 501st.

And anakin Walks into the council room manic vibrating out of his skin after having 10 cans of energy drinks: do you know what I need to do to knit someone's skin back together? Do you think I could intern with the healers for a few hours? I think I've figured out how to make the human body regenerate entire organs but it's the useless stuff like the appendix. Can I have access to some sith books I know yall have locked away in the vaults??

And the council :

Just. He's still sleep deprived, hes definitely losing his marbles a little cus his new hyperfixation is healing techniques, bros learning anatomy till 5 am in the morning and healing troopers through sheer force of will by the end of the next battle. Learns how to control the flow of the blood so he can stop bleeding from major arteries while one of the medics stitches people up.

Anyway he's basically so pumped up about his newfound knowledge he forgets about palpatine completely until palply gets impatient and pokes at him hoping to push anakin over the edge but all it does is make anakin run to the council, cus how the fuck does Palpatine know about his visions and nightmares anyway???????

The council goes to confront him. Only this time, anakin doesn't give into his urge to defend palpy cus he doesn't need him anymore.

Mace gets house arrest as a sentence for killing palpy without trial but he's like: jokes on you mfs I like the temple and I didn't wanna leave this place anyway.

Padmè gives birth, it's a pretty safe delivery, she gives birth at an actual well equipped med centre, the twins were a surprise but anakin doesn't get to use his skills which he mopes a little about but then he's too distracted by his kids' big eyes

And they all lived happily ever after ♥️♥️♥️

[pathetickuroo]

fukutora hcs bc theyre funny

- fukunaga shohei #1 lover of badddd bad bad bad movies. terrible films. not good. we're talking sharknado snakes on a plane willys wonderland velocipastor that one thanksgiving slasher film that i cant remember the name of rn (dont think abt the mechanics of it being a thanksgiving movie too hard). generally not a movie enjoyer i think but most certainly clocking in for shit that is Not Good

- tora is baffled every time but definitely not opposed to it (this guy loves cuddling on the couch i think he hits the fake yawn arm around shoulders maneuver like. regularlyyyy and fukunaga doesnt even pretend to think its silly anymore)

- "shohei this movie doesnt even make any sense" "🤷"

- tora the hugger from behind of All Time he is finding any possible excuse. "u look cold" or "makin up for lost time" or "i have practice in an hour plsss plssssss just let me have this PLSSSSSSS" (he uses that one in particular a lot) (fukunaga wouldnt have said no in the first place) (he thinks its cute so he doesnt say anything abt it)

- repressed-as-hell hs tora did not quiteee know what to do w whatever tf he had goin on so he didnt get the guts (ha) to say anything until a couple years after graduation (which he then said over text bc yokohama -> tokyo = long distance)

- fukunaga conveys thoughts in as few words as possible (which is fucking awesome btw if fukunaga has no fans it means ive died) BUT in order to preserve the meaning it sometimes takes a second to respond

- tora did Not have a good time attempting to navigate this when he was trying to confess

- bro immediately started freaking out to yaku "DUDE WHY DID I DO THAT THAT WAS SO STUPID" "omfg its fukunaga give him a second. impatient ass" "I THINK IM DYING" "jfc"

- meanwhile in tokyo fukunaga was staring at "i rly like u dude" trying to figure out if tora meant like (homie) or like (w/gay intent)

- fukunaga only ever calls tora by his full government given name when he is Displeased. tora used the pan he needed for dinner tn so now he has to wash it? taketora. tora rearranges his living room w no warning? taketora. doesnt even say it in a mean/angry tone or anything j matter of fact as all hell. honestly i think if fukunaga was ever genuinely angry abt smth hell would probably freeze over

- tora does get extremely pouty abt it tho. "shoheiii what did i do :(" "the pan" ".......OH FUC—"

- when tora first moved to yokohama he got a cat bc of course he did he graduated from nekoma. tf else was he supposed to do, get a dog? (maybe in the future)

- very very fluffy very cute very sweet tuxedo girl. her name is "destroyer" (yes really) he calls her badass on the reg and she is sooo cuddly w him. fukunaga finds all of this extremely funny

- in fact when fukunaga starts visiting suddenly destroyer doesnt gaf abt tora anymore. worse than pain of death in his opinion it is So Not Fair. first thing fukunaga does after he meets the cat is send a pic to the old nekoma gc "top 10 cats that like me more than they like their owners" tora throws a pillow at him "i RAISED her from a BABY" "did u rly" ".....NO BUT IT AINT RIGHT"

- after theyve been together a few months toras thinkin abt how fukunaga used to Never Talk Ever and he makes a joke "ha i guess i learned how to speak BODY language am i right. right shohei. thats funny right"

- fukunaga calls him taketora for a week. tora retires that joke permanently and they never speak of it again

- tora morning person fukunaga not-exactly-a-night-owl-but-doesnt-love-being-awake-at-5:30 person. one time fukunagas in yokohama for the weekend he wakes up at 6 annoyed as hell (tora got up at 5 and left for a run) bc wtf his pillow literally got up and walked away. falls back asleep wakes up again at 10 tora made not only coffee but pancakes too AND heated them up for him hes immediately like ok nvm this is fine actually no complaints (<- still gets annoyed when his human teddy bear ditches him)

- TORA BABE SAYER. hey babe thanks babe i missed u babe. but it took him foreverrrrrr (forever) to get comfortable actually saying it instead of thinkin inside so there was also (and still is) a lot of dude (romantic) bro (romantic) man (romantic).

- fukunaga doesnt like saying pet names or anything (but to be fair does he like saying ANYTHING most of the time) but does not mind being called them at all (that's a lie he thinks it's awesome and so so so sweet but when tora asks if it's okay he says he doesn't mind)

[woaaahh-itz-caam]

You people need to start TAKING MY WARNINGS SERIOUSLY!!! This is what happens when u let me yap!!

Anyways drops a shit ton of headcanons + random stuff and runs away :3

I actually think they fit the “fell first, fell harder” trope pretty well!! Nm’s first meeting with Error was probably just him sensing a lot of negativity from an au Error was wrecking and when bro walked in and saw that dude covered in dust and laughing like a maniac,,, yea he was into it.

Error DEFINITELY took his sweeeeeet time tho! I don’t blame him though, from his pov a random ass dude he didn’t gaf abt just randomly started stalking him and asking him to “make an alliance” with him out of the blue!! It was only when Nightmare stopped pestering him and just hanged out (crashing into error’s void ink and fresh style) that he actually started crushing <33

Very fun fact tho ERROR HAD LIKE ZERO IDEA HE WAS CRUSHING AT FIRST LMAO— Like man just thought he just REALLY liked being friend’s with Nm until he told geno and swap abt it and they just looked at him weird. Dudes had to SIT DOWN and break down the fact he MIGHT have a silly lil crush. Oh and btw error fucking crashed after that lmao

If u were to somehow manage to roll up one of Nightmare’s sleeves, UR GONNA FIND A FRIEND BRACELET!! (Blue string tied around his wrist in a very shitty and cheap looking way) 

This “”””””””bracelet”””””””” is actually Nm’s way of letting Error know shit’s going down!! I personally hc that, since error can see through the eyes of the people he strings, he could prob feel through em when people pull em n stuff!! (LIKE SPIDERS!! SPIDER ERROR REAL!!!!)

So yea whenever Nm’s in DEEP shit, he just tugs tf out of his bracelet n uses his scary dog privileges LMAOO

They learned they both speak spanish by accident actually!! Nm was prob talking shit abt someone and a random “Maldito pendejo” slipped out and Error had to DOUBLE TAKE

They soooo gossip in spanish ALL THE TIMEEEE (Nm acts like he doesn’t care but he’s a gossiper on the inside im sure of it)

Nightmare prob has a whole ass wardrobe for all of the clothes and items Error has knitted him. Hats, scarves, sweaters, gloves, tiny little dolls of his peers and himself??? u name it, he has it!!

Error meanwhile, has a special place in his string web?? nest?? Big blue scramble thing- Where he keeps all of the wrappers of all the chocolates Nm has gifted him (gay people istg smh)

Nm’s sweater (the one he wears underneath that ugly ass hoodie lmao) is AAAALLL PATCHED UP BY OUR LORD AND SAVIOR ERROR!! Whenever he sees any of the bad sanses clothes laying around with a brand new rip or hole, he’ll just snatch it and returned it fixed. He swears he does it so that “the abominations don’t look like hobos” (funny for him to say that) but they all know its cuz he cares.. a lil.. just a tiny bit..

These bitches r SOOOOO DAMN CORNY!! not in public tho. They would rather die before even daring to SMILE at each other in front of other people.

Not gonna write more cuz i feel like alladat is enough Cam Yapping™️ for u guys today. i DO have more, as these two homosexuals live rent free in my head basically all day long, but ion wanna bother y’all further

Anyways yea moral of the story do NOT let cam yap. Like ever.