#but just a creation to look like a person- his name discarded

[trailblczed]

✧ the whipgraft delusion: the phenomenon in which you catch your reflection in the mirror and get the sense that you're peering into the eyes of a stranger.

obscure sorrows drabble prompts ( 1 + 2 ) | Not Currently Accepting.

WARNING: Injury / Self Injury

Ever since the events in the Fyxestroll Garden, Caelus has been a bit.. cautious around reflective surfaces- primarily mirrors ( especially if it's old or seems far more decorative and designed than a simple wall mirror ). He isn't unfamiliar with being "possessed" ( which is insane to think about ), but that time was.. different. Being actively trapped in a world created in your own mind while your body is used to aide a Heliobus intent on becoming all powerful.

But this... this is different. It's a whole new level of upsetting.

The lad had gone into his bathroom, intending to take a shower at the end of the system day, when the mirror near the sink caught his attention. More so- what he saw in the mirror had caught his attention. Caelus did not see himself, which was odd enough, but what was there was an individual he doesn't know.. at least, he doesn't think he does. The person is more feminine looking than he is- with much longer hair, shoulder width a tad smaller, eyes much larger than his own- but this figure's hair and eye color are the exact same as his own.. Surely it's not- Caelus raises a hand to the air, slowly moving it side to see the one in the mirror do the same gesture. The similarity is uncanny, and Caelus can't help but feel unsettled.

That's not him. This lady couldn't be him. Maybe she was him. Or maybe, he is her. Maybe she was his previous life. Or the person he was created to replicate- to replace. The lad feels tense, hands now clenched at his sides as he stares at the reflection- and the reflection stares back. The woman is no longer mimicking his motions, instead crossing her arms while giving him a bored stare. The action startles him, his own eyes widening with the shock, a single step take to back away. Her voice is lower than he would expect it to be, but it somehow.. seems to be on a same pitch as his own..

❛❛ Do you really think you are your own person? You are me reborn, S̷͚͑͐ţ̴͌é̸̜̝l̸̠̆l̶̛̙ͅĕ̴̯., aŚ̸̩̼͒t̸̞͂͜ë̸̱̣́̕l̴͎͕͗̄ḽ̴͋́ạ̶͊̒r̶͚̥͑o̶͔̝̓ṉ̸̙̎͋ ̵̜̌͝H̶̫̏̿ù̵̯n��̖̱͒̚t̷͔͂ẽ̴̖̘r̴̤̊̈́. ❜❜

Part of the statement is unintelligible, sounding almost as if it were a glitch in a game, but it hardly matters when all he can focus on is the fact that she is claiming Caelus is her. He always wonders whether he is himself, or some deceased person's soul shoved into a robotic body. He prays this is some sort of hallucination, but part of him drowns at the declaration, accepting it to be true. Even so, hasn't get done enough to be able to say he is no longer who he was created from? That he was his own being? Hell, even if this woman was someone who died and he came from her, Caelus has died twice on his own, and came back with his sense of self still in-tact.

❛❛ You can't hide from your past. You can't change the fact that you are simply a replacement for me. ❜❜

She's not even yelling or being aggressive, she's talking so matter-of-factly that he can't help but believe her. Is this what Kafka meant by being unable to defy fate? Being stuck to a script that has your destiny set in stone? No.. no.. No, he is himself. He's gone against the odds and won, changed an outcome, restored destroyed places and pride. He can't be-- but what if what he's doing is simply what this woman would have done..? What if he is following what she has written out for him? That's can't be true.. No- Nonononono--

❛ I am not--- I am not!! ❜

❛❛ Why do you think Kafka left you in that space station? Because you were a defective substitute that she did not want. She tried to bring me back, but all she got was you. ❜❜

❛ SHUT UP! ❜

CRASH.

He hadn't even realized how close he had gotten to the mirror until a bare fist ( he had taken his gloves off beforehand, he had intended to get clean after all ) made contact with it, shattering the thing into pieces that fell into the sink below and to the floor ignoring the shards still embedded into his knuckles. His breathing is harsh, quick to match his racing heart, chest rapidly rising and falling. He blinks at the mirror blind to his own injured limb slow to process what he had just done. His knees gradually lose their ability to keep him upright, falling to rest on his knees getting a few of the broken shards stabbed into his legs and tearing into his "skin". There's gold staining what is left of the mirror hanging on the wall, there's gold trickling down his arm, and there's a small amount pooling under him. His first instinct isn't to check on himself, but how guilty he feels for damaging something he worked hard to earn from Pom-Pom. Pom-Pom is going to be so mad at him for breaking stuff again.

Tears have already fallen down his cheeks, face growing damp as the amount grows larger the longer he kneels there in his bathroom, surrounded by the destruction of his own making. Everything hurts, and he doesn't know how to make it go away. What is he supposed to do? He's doomed to whatever script has been made for him. He is a prisoner of a fate he doesn't even know. He feels his throat constricting as he tries and fails to get his breathing under control, as he struggles to get the tears to stop, as hands lay limp at his sides, as he tries to get the image of a female look-alike out of his mind, tries to erase a voice similar yet distinctly not his own out of his ears.

He can't take it anymore, slipping off his knees as his body crumples under the heavy weight of his heart. Legs awkwardly folded against the floor, adding a few more scrapes to the limbs as trembling hands come to tangle in his hair, desperately gripping at silver locks as his head lowers in shame and grief. Even as he speaks to himself, every word is croaked out.

❛ I'm not.. I'm not..... I'm not I'm not I'm not I'm no--- ❜

An anguished mantra, repeated to an audience of one in hopes that it will some day be the truth.

[ogh-rambles]

Rewriting Fate - Chapter 1

prologue > chapter 1 (you're here!) > chapter 2

word-count! 1.1k

warnings! none unless u count heart-wrenching angst as one

tag-list! @shizunxie , @sam-screams , @swivy123 , @thenyxsky

“... Who’s there?”

His raspy voice echoes around the room and you wince, head against the wall, barely hidden underneath the window.

You wonder how painfully long he had been crying for before you had found him.

Just a few seconds ago, you had ducked down after making direct eye contact with the one… character? Person? Person, you had dedicated hours of your time to.

Levelling him up, ascending him, pulling for his damned weapon (even after losing it to Itto’s claymore), maxing out said weapon… You practically gave him the luxury Genshin treatment. Your face falls with a thin-lipped smile, knowing how much real-world money you had to spend for this man. 

However, ‘this man’ was also currently on the other side of this thin wooden wall. Your mouth goes unbearably dry.

Heartbeats thud deafeningly in your ears as you hear a shuffling of fabric and then an abrupt thud. Shoulders jerking, your poor heart leaps to your throat at the sound.

Hearing nothing but stillness and the sound of your unsteady breaths for the next few moments, you begin to grow worried. What if he fell over? Hurt himself? You remembered that since he's only just been 'let free to roam' by his creator — that was but a small while past his initial creation.

At this thought, you find yourself nervously making your way into the darkened hallway through a rickety old sliding door. 

Sure enough, he lay there, albeit in a more crumpled manner than you last saw him in. Dark indigo hair splayed out around his head like a halo, his veil discarded beside him. Alarmed, you rush towards him, kneeling at his side as your hands hover over his limp form. Did your appearance break him already? Oh god--

A cold hand grasps blindly at your clothes, tugging at your shirt as the prototype lifts his head. You jolt in surprise, not making any noise or movement as if he were a cat you were coaxing.

A few mumbles of inherent words leave his lips. You frown, leaning in a bit closer to hear what he's saying.

"...Why are you here?" He finally speaks, voice thready and weak. 

Pausing, you let the silence linger for only a second before responding, just as quietly as he had. "Well, I heard someone crying and I..."

You trail off. What did you even think to achieve, in following his cries, in walking into this domain?

"I wanted to help...?"

To your horror, it comes out more like a question rather than an answer because, to be frank, even you didn't know why. You hope that he doesn't ask you to elaborate because you don't believe you could give him a proper answer.

His eyes meet yours again, miserable and confused. A look, much too innocent for who he will become... and what he will go through in the future. Unsettled by your darkening thoughts, you fidget under his unyielding gaze.

"Why do you wish to help... me? I don't even know who you are."

Your heart sinks at his very reasonable question. Dammit, what were you meant to say? 

‘Oh, it's nothing! It’s only because I know your entire backstory, and character and have read through your character stories an unhealthy amount of times.’

You'd rather eat your foot.

Reluctant to scare him once more, you attempt to smile at him as you gently take the hand that is so tightly gripped at your sleeve.

"You don't have to know someone to want to help them." You explain, making yourself comfortable in front of him. "Plus... Who says we can't get to know each other now?"

Looking down at him with kind eyes (or so you hope it comes off that way), you tilt your head. "What's your name?"

Kunikuzushi? Scaramouche? Wanderer? He pauses, his eyes wavering and breaking away from yours. Your heart drops at his crestfallen expression.

"I do not have one." His voice breaks, along with your flimsy heart.

You have to physically restrain yourself from spilling what his mother had wanted for him, that she never left him with the intent of abandoning him, never wished upon him the life he was destined to experience.

Barely concealing a frown, you quietly sigh. Fate can be cruel but Gods can be even crueler, you felt.

"That's okay. I don't need to know names to get to know you." You lightly squeeze his hand in yours. "Is it alright if I ask you what happened?"

The forlorn expression swiftly morphs into one of pure heartache as his eyes go glassy. The hand that barely clutched back in your hand tightened ever so desperately around your own, and you narrowly held back a wince at the pain.

You almost forget that he was made with the hands of a God. It was reasonable for him to rival the strength of one.

"My creator... My mother left me without saying a word." He croaked. "She didn't stop to look back at me once."

Your brows furrow as you watch him fruitlessly attempt to hold down his tears. Tears that had led a god to deem him too vulnerable, too fragile, too emotional to uphold such a title as 'The Raiden Shogun's Puppet.'

Reaching over, you place your unoccupied hand on his shoulder. Feeling it shudder and quiver with every concealed cry, you see his teary eyes flick over to you, wide and lost.

"It's okay to cry once in a while." You say. "It's only human."

He looks down at himself, confused.

"But," He spoke in hushed tones, his unoccupied hand reaching up and resting on his chest. "I am not human. I do not own a heart like you."

You knew well of that. But at this moment-- you think he feels nothing but human. Now that he sits in front of you, bearing his sorrow, you can’t help but see this character that you had watched develop through a screen, as a real being. 

"Well, I think... you seem to be very human." You give him a lopsided smile. "Maybe even more human than me." 

(The dam floods and shatters, taking him along with it but he holds onto you for dear life and... and you let him. Your warmth is a sharp contrast against his cool hands and face-- but it is ever so comforting as you wrap your arms so tenderly and kindly around him.)

He feels safe.

You decide to give him a name. In your head, of course, you didn't wish to give him a name that he did not choose.

In the end, you end up with the name: Kuni. For now, anyway.

Speaking of whom, Kuni had stopped sniffling quite some time ago and was now sitting up-- studying you with blatant curiosity. You sweatdrop under his fixed gaze but you're glad he looks much calmer than when you first found him.

"You never told me your name." He suddenly spoke, making you jerk.

"Ah... Did I not?" You laugh nervously. He simply stares at you with wide shining eyes, expecting you to answer. Obviously.

Sighing deeply, you decide to tell him your name with a twinge of reluctance. 

You know you probably shouldn't interfere with his past, despite how badly you long to push him on a path to a better... happier, content life. You also know that it most definitely would change a lot of things in the future. You didn't want to risk that. For both of you.

He echoes your name, looking more content as time passes. 

"Now, we know each other!" You grin despite your inner turmoil, pleased that he’s feeling better than before.

Kuni timidly smiles back at you. It's one so small and gentle, so out of character for his present self as ‘Scaramouche’, 'The Balladeer, the 6th of the Fatui Harbingers' and 'The Wanderer'.

You think could die happy knowing that you made him smile, you think to yourself giddily, not noticing his stare.

There is nothing but pure wonder in his eyes. "Yes."

[tech-flyer]

[INTRO POST YAY]

Petra - Interastral Peace Corporation, Technology Department

"If youre about to put more on my plate, please just.. Dont. I know im good at this but i already have my hands full, im not the only person that can do this, you know? Why dont you ever ask someone else…"

Despite her ambitious nature, rarely would others describe her as such, due to her tendency to avoid unnecessary work. She spends most of her free time dedicated to her own personal projects - that is to say building random robotic creatures she finds adorable. Unfortunately for her, such things are not very welcome in the Corporation as theyre seen as mere distractions, often leading to her creations sadly being discarded.

"I know im skilled but im not a miracle worker! Cant they extend the deadline just a bit..?"

Although intelligent, she keeps a down to earth demeanour which often causes others to underestimate her skills and knowledge. Those who know her well often remark how eerie it is to hear her talk about robots, as if she knew them from inside and out - as if they were people, and as if shes one of them.

"Yes, of course i understand the assignment, but cant i work with someone else? These people dont even remember my name, how can i trust them to remember what parts to get, let alone how to put them together?"

While she once believed the IPC had a good cause, her rose coloured glasses quickly fell off once she was officially employed. The Corporation was no longer her saviour, but a controlling force, slowly draining her passion for the robotics away - she would much rather spend her days doing her own thing.

The young robotics enthusiast often wonders what her life would look like if she teamed up with someone else, mostly enjoying the thought of joining the Intelligentsia Guild alongside her idol. She always enjoyed his company, especially fascinated by his critiques which are taken very seriously by her, fascinated by such a critical mind helping her get as close to perfection with projects as possible.

"Im sorry to say this but this project seems a bit too.. oh? In person with The Intelligentsia Guild again? Ah, of course, ill get to it right away! "

While taking every negative comment with a brave face, she was always very desperate to impress someone higher, yet it seemed impossible. She understood why people underestimate her, who say shes nothing special, often agreeing with the sentiment herself.

"Anyone could do it with enough practice, after all."

"Dont you ever wonder why everything seems so strange? The world hides so many secrets from you Pigeon, and yet you are so uninterested in the truth. Will the day ever come where you finally care to ask for answers…?"

// this took way too long im not a good writer . thats all for now....at least untill i figure out what else i need here, will be adding more stuff when needed :3

lmk if ive made any mistakes btw!! first time doing smthn like this so yea (◍•ᴗ•◍")

anyone is welcome to join in any way they want and interact with her ヾ(＾-＾)ノ

main blog: @razzmothazz

[katyspersonal]

What is your opinion on our silly tree pope ?

Oh, that FUCKING bitch motherfucker fuck, god I hate him so much, I'd strangle him if his stupid wooden neck was not so thick,

Sorry, I meant to say YAYYYY what a cool compelling character, truly one of the most iconic and interesting ones in Dark Souls trilogy!! Really great battle especially!

Okay in all seriousness now, it isn't even a shitpost and my feelings towards him are a bit unstable. He is a rare case of a villain who is not even morally grey. The guy was born in the place for those neglected, unwanted, discarded or just not feeling like they belonged to the "actual" world and made his liberation from it everyone else's problem!

I do think that in general Dark Souls trilogy benefits from a change that is having a character who is just bad and corrupt power-hungry tyrant, as every other character at least had interests of humanity and/or the world in general in mind! Nuanced characters go harder when there are contrasting ones! But also this is what makes my opinion shift from wanting to bully the bastard to finding him fun or even attractive, depending on the mood.

There are some things I want to address though regarding how I interpret the character! I had another post where I've discussed my interpretation of what kind of creature he is exactly ( x )! In short; I believe he is 25% tree and 75% human, but is Just Like That rather than having been human(ish) before becoming corrupted into a more tree-like form. As for his motivations.. I don't think that he wanted to end the Age of Fire specifically, but rather that he is an opportunistic asshole and will roll with whatever helps him! Helps with what? Well, it ranges from having total control to simply surviving, which I think is what happened between him and Aldrich!

Japanese original makes it a bit more clear that Sulyvahn "eventually" fed Gwyndolin to Aldrich, that gives me feeling as though it was not his original intention, but... Seeing that he did imprison Yorshka and is hiding her from Aldrich, and at first imprisoned Gwyndolin too, I think his motivation was to usurp the power. He is opportunistic asshole that wants control! And what could give more of that than being THE pope of Way of White?

At first, that was accomplished through Gwyndolin, and I have a strong impression that he fed the guy to Aldrich as means of self-defence. I'd say it is even more likely how Sulyvahn looks like quite a mess with his clothes being thorn, so maybe he was fighting against Aldrich before managing to buy himself time, or mercy altogether, by offering him Gwyndolin instead. If he was a huge simp of Aldrich that just wanted the Age of Fire to be done with, I think he should have offered him Yorshka as well for a good measure! The fact that he keeps her a secret from him gives me an impression that he saves her just in case if 1) Age of Deep thing fails and he'll need another person to puppet that Yorshka would work as or 2) Aldrich attempts coming for him another time and he'll need another offering, so he has to 'space out' people he's offering to keep his own ass safe!

+ I also want to add that another possible argument in favour of Sulyvahn presumably wanting to end the Age of Fire is unclear identity of Lothric's secret teacher who was said to be sceptical about the Fire. Likely, that teacher was the one who convinced Lothric to refuse to burn to begin with, too.

Yeah yeah @heraldofcrow shuddup about the misspelling lol

I do think that the secret teacher in question was actually Aldia! And I am gonna cheat this time and share the video that explains it better than I could, but in my defence my arguments would be the same:

(In summary: it would be strange for the pope to come in a "secret" + who else is known as the first scholar AND knew that Fire couldn't do shit? + spells Soul Geyser and Soul Stream are actually the same spell and different names are localisation liberty, whereas this spell is creation of Aldia and in DS3 is found in the Grand Archives!)

Sulyvahn was also a smart and curious sorcerer, but I am not convinced so far that he got some transcendental ideas on how the Age of Fire is a doomed ordeal and Aldrich's vision was more efficient. I get an impression that he just IS one of the corrupt miserable idiots that will hold onto the power even if it is falling apart at the seams and harming everyone for as long as they can, and if he is to "help" Aldrich then either in the interest of self-preservation or in an attempt to control everything through Aldrich. My current headcanon is also that Sulyvahn was the one to burn Aldrich the first time since Aldrich himself would not have interest in being Lord of Cinder with his own idea in mind, so all problems are caused by.... well, Aldrich crawling back up with vengeance..

_________________________

I think I covered the basics about this character! Yeahhhh I know I state that he is 'just bad' as a matter of fact, when it lingers on my reading and interpretation like every goddamn thing in Soulsborne..

I guess my point is that he IS a fun character and good for his role, just not good enough for ME to obsess over or anything like that!

[abusivelittlebunny]

MATE

PREGNANT CORY PREGNANT CORY PREGNANT CORY PREGNANT CORY

He surprises everyone with how well he adjusts to his pregnancy (Dream the most). He can't stop rubbing his bump and shopping for baby clothes and furniture; all cream and pearly white and beige, because he's an aesthetic hoe above all else and he's gotta rework Richard's penthouse apartment to fit his new taste for a soft domestic atmosphere.

Dream thought Corinthian would get bored of it soon enough; all that nagging and begging to give him the reproductive system of an actual omega in the waking world and allow him to get impregnated by a human was by far his most unusual request, but he was quite keen on this man named Richard after all. Dream granted it after Hob sweet-talked him into it, but on a few conditions; Corinthian can't opt out of his pregnancy, he has to carry his litter to term and then he cannot discard the children (half dreamlings?) under no circumstance; he wanted this burden he'll have to take care of it. The litter also belonged to Morpheus himself ultimately; Corinthian maybe their mother and Richard their father, but Dream had a certain kind of monopoly over them; if he didn't deem the two of them fit as parents he'd take sole custody over them. Cory was hesitant over agreeing to that term but in the end gave in.

Dream didn't expect him to have the qualities of a mother, he didn't remember crafting him with that kind of nature but Corinthian surprisingly proved him wrong and he seemed in love with his bump, constantly caressing it and acting like a groomed and domesticated cat, not causing much trouble in the waking world either. Dream initially was against Corinthian’s relationship with Richard, but now he had to admit he was of a much needed calming effect on his creation. Corinthian would only maim or kill humans that threatened him in some sort of way and he'd always excuse it with "You know how territorial an omega gets, my lord" while holding his belly protectively like Dream would personally know. To be frank, seeing how much Corinthian was enamored with his current lifestyle, Dream did get curious and wondered if a pregnancy would have a similar effect on him (he shot down the thought of asking Hob to impregnate him as quick as it came).

Dream sometimes popped by, watching Cory as he decorated their apartment or cooked or just amused himself with mundane human things like films or books and he'd sit with him, drinking tea and taking a bite of whatever Cory offered and....talking. It made their relationship a lot less tense, this. Richard would joke "Darling, your father is here," or say "oh I didn't know my in law was in town" when he'd see Dream, an overly familiar way of greeting a being such as himself but Richard was one of those handful of humans that didn't seem bothered by what Morpheus or Corinthian was; sort of like Hob. Richard was the one that nudged Dream to touch Cory's belly, feel the life beneath his skin blooming.

"Those are your grandkids," Richard grinned at him, his one good eye glinting and Morpheus felt something warm and pulsing beneath his palm. Heartbeats. Dream could tell how many of them there were before doctors could, but he didn't want to spoil the surprise, he just hummed and smiled and let the moment wash through him.

"I'm looking forward to make their acquaintance." Morpheus caressed the stretched soft skin and looked at Corinthian’s face who seemed overcome with happiness and his chuckle sounded more like a sob as he nodded.

"Thank you, my lord. I'm sure they do as well."

"Oh you two," Hob groaned from the side, Richard chuckling along with him while holding Cory close. "I can't stand how overly formal you two act around each other. Dream, tell your son you can't wait to be a grandma or a grandpa or whatever, and give him a fucking hug already. Practice being a good parent before Cory does."

"Our relationship isn't like... we cannot be compared to..." Corinthian huffed, but Dream could hear the yearning in his voice. And even if he didn't he knew from private talks with Richard that Corinthian did view him as a parent.

"We could. I think it's fitting." Morpheus nodded and gave a gentle smile to Corinthian who seemed over the moon from that simple confession. "I will... do my best to be a good grandparent to your children, Corinthian."

The hug was cautious and unsure on both their parts at first, but once Cory's belly pressed into his middle they both melted into it. Dream avoided looking at Hob's shit-eating grin and instead nodded at Richard who smiled like the sun while petting Cory's back proudly.

"I cannot tell you how grateful I am, my l-, Dream." Corinthian whimpered against his neck, clutching at Morpheus desperately. "You have given me everything I've ever desired and never earned. I'll repay you however you wish me too, I promise."

"Hush, my little dream, do not think of such things just yet." Dream whispered and pet Corinthian’s hair confortingly while wondering how Cory would react when he finds out that Morpheus requested from Death to make Richard immortal so he could have his desired family for eternity.

[ahmedmootaz]

Since you respond here quicker than ao3 and had to look up what was my question, why won't X give himself a new name post-tMFoA? I can get the explanation with Hope. (And had X had been named Hope in au, I really would’ve think Angela would scoff at the reminder from Hope the person, with the seed of light being grown by blood and suffering)

But this is actually me segue on what will X and Angela would name BH? Would it be the same as Ayin, since one is a clone and the other is his creation? (Weirdass family tree there) or one or both of them have better naming sense than him?

What about Carmen anyways, how's her naming skill? And why not throw The Distortion, I guess. Because who names them, the distorted themselves? TD? the patron librarian (and lcb sinners)?

I was mostly thinking X and Angela adopting BH post-AiP (but an au of X being part of Library founding would be neat in a different ask) but wasn’t sure how far BH is cause Angela in her bad end has ridiculously long hair, versus LoR's short hair. Cause X's fate is nebulous if he wants to live long, or died from the battle or from clone degradation.

So potentially we could have Angela adopting BH with fond memories of X, X lived long enough to love and care for BH but still cut short anyways, or none of those two and I'll finally get X/Angela slowburn.

Dear astrocouriers,

Good questions all around! And quite the complex and interesting ones too, although I hope you'll forgive me for not replying too quickly, even though it was quicker than the time it would've taken on AO3, ahah.

Essentially, my personal reasoning for why X wouldn't change his name is that whatever he would choose wouldn't be him anymore. Being "Hope" or "Ayin 2" or any other name simply wouldn't have had the relevancy to him that X does; simply changing his name would be too easy after everything he went through, in a way. There would be no struggle in just deciding to be "Hope" from now on, but it simply isn't who he was. He was never the hope that the Corporation's denizens needed, and he wouldn't stand up to Ayin's legacy and power, he was simply an unknown factor in an otherwise perfectly planned equation. An 'X' factor, if you will.

Hence, X's name to him signifies that battle that he had to endure. It signifies that he was simply a variable that had no real purpose beyond his assigned role, a failed clone with little abilities compared to his original version and with a far meeker attitude, unimportant enough to the grand scheme of everything and everyone that he wasn't even given a proper name.

But more than just that, it especially signifies that he survived. In spite of all of these hurdles, in spite of being a faceless, nameless clone with a singular task and no grand purpose after it, in spite of being intended to simply die after his purpose was complete, he not only lived, but he carved himself into a person. The name X, then, is a proof that he survived everything that was thrown at him and gave a meaning to a nameless, faceless clone, just as Ayin gave meaning to the hollow word that 'promise' is in the City when he promised Carmen and went through the unimaginable for her.

As a last note, I think X wouldn't like discarding his name because, despite all of the negative memories associated with it, it's the name he came to recognise for himself as well. For all of the pain it holds, it holds a lot of happiness and relief as well, a constant reminder that regardless of how bleak it is, he can make it out again, just as he made it in the Corporation after countless (mostly forgotten) restarts to the Script.

As for your second question, hmmm...I think Angela would have great difficulty finding names, and honestly, so would X, seeing how both of them are either close to Ayin's method of thinking in X's case and straight-up Ayin's daughter in Angela's case, which means both of their creative skills are likely a...dud, to say the least. Still, I reckon that eventually they can settle on something that they'd find from their books, such as Aqua because X is a sentimental fool and the name reminds him of Angela's hair (plus the name is semi-neutral so whether or not the BH is a boy or a girl it'd work). But yeah, if the other Librarians were around, they'd likely be the ones to find a suitable name while Angela and X argue together about how weird/not weird their relationship/family tree is.

As for Carmen, considering she's the exact opposite of Ayin, I'd say her naming skills are vastly superior, and that she/The Distortion is likely the one that picks Distortion names, seeing how most Distortions aren't exactly conscious enough to pick their own names. If we go by the theory that Abnormality names were also spawned from Carmen's subconscious/Bucket, then she seems to have quite the palette of names to choose from, definitely something she'd be sad she couldn't transfer to her daughter, hehe.

If I recall correctly, Angela's bad ending occurs some thirteen years after Roland's defeat, so in such a scenario, I think X would definitely choose Angela repairing his wounds and degradation so he could not only live with her, but with the BH. I think X isn't averse to living a long life, actually, but I also think he would wish to die at some point. He's evaded Death long enough now, and even if he decides to grow old with Angela by his side, he has to pay his due one day, and he'd like to come to terms with it on his own instead of being forcefully evicted out of his mortal coil.

In other words, yes, I think that if Angela and X adopt the BH, you'll finally get your Angela/X slowburn, kehehe.

Once again, thank you for the insightful and fun ask, astrocourier! I hope to see you again soon! Be well, stay safe, and see ya'!

[thealphavoidofficial]

So decided to share some Lore about my main Oc, Void:

So basic backstory:

They are one of the creations of the Creator before Sun and Moon, however unlike the past attempts the Creator used Void as more of an experiment, using a power Core composed of Anti-matter (what a WitherStorm is made of) and implanting it into the bots chest as a power source, and of course these had certain effects, such as making them partly organic, such as resulting in them having a fully organic rib cage, a tongue and saliva, and with some nano-machines, an artificial stomach able to process any and all Materials.

When Void first activated they were put into the care of their handler, Cathryn, a young women who had only recently started working at the Pizzaplex. Void was assigned to the Daycare theatre and left to adapt.

Cathryn showed them all the ropes, and soon Void caught on to the routine and was soon doing their job like it was already programmed into their code. Soon they grew so fond of Cathryn they had registered them as ‘Mother’, which she did not mind in the slightest.

Although, once Void has properly assimilated into their Job at the Theatre entertaining the kids, the Creator put his real plan into action. While Void and Cathryn were preparing for the next rush if kids the Creator activated a dormant administration code inside of Void, cause them to become a brain dead robot, Cathryn walked over to see what was wrong, and with just a click of a button on the Creators end, Cathryn was dead by Voids hands. And once Void came to they were horrified to have seen what they had done, looking at their bloodied hands in shock and horror.

Security soon rushed in and shut them down, soon awakening again in parts and services where they were violently dismantled and used for parts while still active, after the many hours of agony they were dumped into an alleyway and left to die. Void unfortunately died on that stormy night, however a relatively large size changing Water Dragon animatronic, named Angler, had found them and taken them into a secret factory sized room hidden in the maintenance tunnels of the pizzaplex, where he had been taking in and hiding all the discarded and scrapped animatronics thrown out by the Pizzaplex, and Void was brought back to life from a strong infusion of Nano-machines.

Void soon settled in with their now adoptive father and siblings, however still lived in fear of being controlled again.

One day they went to far with their anxiety and snuck into parts and services while the Staff were on break, and used the computer to enter their own systems and forcefully delete any access codes the creator put in them along with their factory reset, this resulted in their code becoming highly unstable, resulting in their Ai becoming corrupted, all safety protocols off and gone.

When Void returned Angler immediately knew what they had done, and he also knew that damage like this could never be fixed, but he supported them and did his best to comfort them the best he could, but one thing he couldn’t stop was Voids newfound hatred and bloodlust towards humans.

Fun facts:

- before Voids system corruption their eyes actually used to be green.

- Void hates all humans but tolerates curtain humans that have gotten on their good side………and children.

- the purple eyes mean they are either hunting, or have completely lost it and you need to run.

- the oval shaped power core in their chest is not only able to store a copy of their memories and personality, but also acts as a 3rd eye.

- their power core is made of the same stuff that Witherstorms are made of.

- like Sun and Moon, Voids nanites can regenerate them, but at a more advanced and quicker pace

- they CAN and WILL Eat anything.

- they can sprout 4 or more barbed black tendrils from their back if they want to.

- at some point they found out they can digitise their physical form and control technology

- they have a secondary jaw that can move independently like an eel

[macbethz]

oh man i would love more transmetropolitan-adjacent 90s comics recs.....

omg i got you. I will be bleeding a little into the late 80s and early 2000s here (as transmetropolitan itself did with the early 2000s) but I do think they full of a similar kind of gross edginess (affectionate).

THIS GOT SO LONG SORRY I GOT EXCITED. also sorry for grammar etc i am kinda falling asleep but YAYY comics

first of all i will say MANDITORY DISCLAIMER that Warren Ellis is an awful person and you can find all his works online if you know where to look and/or used on eBay. HOWEVER he has unfortunately written some of my favorite comics, including transmet. which means of course a lot of the best transmet adjacent stuff is written by him. So some Ellis comics:

Desolation Jones: ONE OF MY ALL TIME FAVES! which is unfortunately forever unfinished at 8 issues. It follows an ex-MI6 operative working as a private eye in Los Angeles, which acts as a secret prison for the discards of the intelligence community. Jones was put through the desolation test for a full year, which was a form of torture where, among other things, he was exposed to images of violence and death 24/7 without sleep, leaving him with little emotion and a very broken mind. Beautiful page composition and art. Be warned though it is just straight up unfinished

"Superhuman Trilogy": This is the name for 3 completely unrelated comics Ellis wrote that all deal with twisted takes on the creation of superheroes: Black Summer, No Hero, and Supergod. Of these I think No Hero strays a little too much into edge for the sake of it, the other two are very good and unique explorations of different aspects of the genre.

Stormwatch: Ellis' Stormwatch run is basically the lead up to the Authority. You CAN skip it and i recommend most people do because it is VERY 90s and not necessarily the good kind. but if you have a passion for 90s nonsense it is very fun and its cool to see the beginnings of the subversions of the comic industry that come to fruition in the Authority. I cannot emphasize enough that this run is fucking insane and of debatable quality. I believe his run goes from vol 1 #37 through the end of vol 2. and don't forget to pick up wildCATS/Aliens if you want to see the true craziness of 90s comics, where a cash-grab crossover is simultaneously essential to the windstorm universe. yeah they just did whatever back then

The Authority: The superhero comic that defined superhero comics for the next 2 decades. Coined the widescreen comic, unfortunately indirectly led the the creation of the MCU. Superheroes as anarchist gods. The end of the century as the end of the world. A lot of stuff that reads to modern eyes as cliche or overdone because the Authority made it so goddamn popular afterwards.

Now for some non Ellis!

If you enjoy transmet you will probably enjoy the other British Invasion writers. Basically there was a period in comics post-Alan Moore where a lot of British writers started getting hired in American comics and writing weird shit.

Sandman: I don't think I need to describe this one. A lot edgier and more directly goth subculture inspired than the netflix adaptation conveyed

Grant Morrison's Doom Patrol: What if instead of making you a superhero your "superpowers" were more like disabilities? And also you were constantly fighting the most batshit enemies possible? That is this comic. Weird, surreal, and very influenced by modern and postmodern artistic movements.

Peter Milligan's Shade, The Changing Man: imo this is such a British Invasion sleeper hit. No one talks abt this one. A being from another dimension with the power to control capital-M-Madness possesses the body of a serial killer right before he is executed on death row. He then teams up with the daughter of the serial killer's victims to stop a plague of Madness from spreading across the US called the American Scream. All about being weird, gross, and awesome.

Now, I have not read Preacher myself. HOWEVER I have seen the show and really enjoyed it. I am naturally suspicious of Garth Ennis but he is a staple of 90s edge so I feel like I have to say something. I can definitely recommend the show and have heard good things about the comic but again. It's Ennis.

Non british invasion and a little later, but I also really recommend Invincible! A lot of that same early 2000s satire and ultraviolence expanded over a MASSIVE storyline that loves superheroes as much as it parodies them

ANYWAY im probably forgetting some but i am sleepy and got excited abt this lmao. A lot of this is pretty popular so might not be anything new but i hope it helps!

[linkspooky]

What was the inspiration for Lio’s siblings? I found them incredibly interesting as characters

I'm assuming you're talking about Jujutsu Kaisen Lio.

So, Lio's family was inspired by the Zerozaki family in Nisioisin's Zaregoto, and Ningen series. The Zerozaki themselves are inspired by the Zen'in from hunter x hunter. Both of those families are a family of assassins defined by their strong family dynamic, where a strong and intense love for each other overlaps with abuse.

The naming scheme for the siblings is a reference to how the Zoldyck children are named. Illumi -> Milluki -> Killua -> Alluka -> Kalluto vs. Li -> Lio -> Okimi -> Mitsuko

Starting with Li, she's actually one of my few characters that's not really inspired by any pre-existing characters. She was actually the character that was hardest to come up with. I knew I needed a character to be Lio's dead older sister to put on a pedestal the same way that Megumi did Tsumiki but I couldn't think of any other character details or personality for her.

She was just going to be perfect originally because she was dead and she didn't get any screentime. The perfect women of the Zen'in clan, she always protected her big brother, always did the chores around the house, and the stress of a child having to support a family like she's the mother combined with a pre-existing condition made her die early from stress.

That was boring though so I discarded the idea. Eventually I came up with the idea when I was joking around with my friends, "What if Megumi thought Tsumiki was perfect but she strangled cats when nobody was looking." Then I was like, "No, WHAT IF, Tsumiki strangled cats when nobody was looking."

So, Li became a dark deconstruction of a perfect big sister like Tsumiki. She basically went from having no personality, to having all of the personality. Rather, Li is someone who defies all roles that other people try to assign her. She's not so much true to herself, as she refuses to define herself by any label or any identity.

This comes from a rejection of her family. In a family of assassins Li was too much of a monster, and was therefore never allowed to be a sourcerer, not because she's a woman, not because she's too strong. The irony that in a family of assassins, the person who kills the easiest and is essentially the perfect assassin is not accepted.

Li is not accepted by the person she wants to accept her and so she rejects everybody. Other people are corpses to Li. They're inanimate objects. Life and death are the same thing. She truly doesn't understand why people mourn death or even see murder as a crime when every life is going to end eventually. Death robs life of any meaning. Her philosophy is based off the phrase, "The world is a dead thing."

Another significant portion in Li's creation is Naoya. Naoya is forever jealous of women who do things better than him and thererfore disporve his belief of his own inherent superiority. The whole Li and Naoya dynamic came from what was essentially another joke I shared with a friend. "Wouldn't it be funny if Naoya had a close friend and she was a woman?" Then Li morphed into becoming what Naoya's ideal is, a person who stands above all others like Gojo and Toji. While Naoya hates everything and views everything as garbage, Li's just apathetic. The same way Naoya renders womens as objects, Li sees Naoya as like, a fun pet to amuse her boredom with. Everyone in the outside world sees Li as the one abusing Naoya, but in reality it's Naoya being abused by Li as her way of expressing her affection for him is to cause him pain.

Finally her cursed technique is basically just Yuta's. A copy technique that requires consuming your targets. However, Yuta can use his ethically by taking parts of his targets, while Li's curse technique requires her to crack open the skull and devour their brains like a zombie. Yuta is also someone praised as a genius for his technique, while Li is rejected as a monster.

Lio and all of their siblings have a cursed technique that revolves around death. Li's technique requires her to cannibalize corpses. Lio's technique only activates upon their death, at which point they travel back in time. Okimi's technique allows her to predict future deaths by seeing into the future. Mitsuko can read the souls of objects to look into the past memories associated with that object.

Okimi and Mitsuko aren't nearly as well developed as Li and Lio, by design because they were only meant to die. I'm not totally happy with how they turned out, because there's nothing really to endear them to the audience and I cut a lot of their screentime because the fic was getting really long and oversaturated with characters but I think it still works because they are unlikable characters but you're supposed to be shocked from the inherent horror of killing a child.

Okimi and Mitsuko are similified versions of Mimiko and Nanako. One of them is quiet and reserved but loving of their sister, the other is loud and in your face and borderline abusive of her sister.

Okimi is inspired by a short story by Otsuichi in the book Zoo called Kazari and Yoko where a girl is abused by her mother and his twin sister is spoiled. She loves her twin sister more than anything else in the world too and endures the abuse because she thinks it's better for her to suffer then her twin, until she finds out her twin secretly despises her behind her back at which point she snaps and murders her sister.

Mitsuko is inspired by the main character of "We have always lived in this Castle" who comes off as a creepy child and a sociopath at first for killing her entire family by lacing their food with arsenic until it's revealed later on in the book her family was heavily abusive.

That's basically it in terms of their inspiration. If you have any more questions about my fics feel free to send me some asks!

[chilumi-shipper]

ok but … to the anon who thought of discarded creation reader x fake albedo,, it got me like asdfhgjgkd; its so cute?? this is more fluffy than smutty , but i imagine “albedo” showing reader sweet affection sometimes , in contrast to the sexual things that the real albedo did, showing that “albedo” cares for reader more than just sex. and when you do have sex with “albedo” , he cares for your sexual pleasure a lot too, kissing your neck and clit often ,, theyre just so cute help

Greatest Creation (3)

Albedo x Fem!Reader

Readers have been asking for it, so here goes... This is the third and final part.

(Part 1) (Part 2)

Warnings: Smut, NSFW, mentions of oral, mentions of sex, Sub!Reader, Fluff Smut, :)

Summary: Albedo sees you and the "Albedo"'s growing relationship, he hates to admit that he kinda misses that imperfection he abandoned in favor of creating a perfect version of you.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

The first time that "Albedo" took you in, you imagined him to be just like your previous master: cold, only sees you as a hole to fuck, and very rough. It affected the boy that you acted as if he would hurt you and throw you out in the cold if you so merely just look at him the wrong way.

You desperately tried to be on your best behavior, exactly how you acted when you were with the real Albedo.

"Albedo" was angry, just like their master, the alchemist seem to only see both you and him as worthless outcomes of an experiment, not real and emotionally driven humans.

You are such a sweet girl, in the eyes of Subject 2, you are perfect, you are amazing, and yet just like him, your creator only focused on your "flaws".

From those days where you would go down on your knees whenever he even just looked at you and try to be so angelic that it's exhausting, both of you are here now, in each other's arms within his cave in the mountains.

You both made the place quite cozy! A little bit of stolen things from treasure hoarders, a fireplace, some lights from his powers.

You think that it's pretty sad that his master didn't even give him a proper name, just a cold "Subject 2".

"How about, instead of calling you Albedo, I'll just call you Al?" You were snuggling his chest on the mattress that you stole from the camp earlier.

"Why does that matter?" He had asked back, looking down on your face and smiling a bit at seeing how you rub your face against his chest.

"Cause, that way, you can have your own name..." You answered, before gasping a bit, "Ooh, unless you have any ideas for a name for yourself."

"I think Al is good." His smile only widened when he saw your own lips curve upwards.

Unlike Albedo, Al didn't do things like harshly grab you by the arm and pushed you down to any surface just to dick you down, then leave you all alone dripping and tired.

No, Al would make sure that you were in a comfortable position, taking you however pace you want to go, slow, fast, soft, rough, whatever you want, just being inside that pussy of yours is enough. He also did things to service you, like eating you out, just because he cares about you and about what you feel. And also aftercare, he doesn't ever want to leave you right after a session, he cleans you to make sure you're comfortable, and he wraps a thick and warm blanket around your cold body, despite your immunity to the cold.

You fell for him... you definitely did.

It took some getting use to, being in a new environment with a new person treating you very differently from another that you got used to. Yet it seems as though, you start to feel thankful that Albedo had buried you into the snow, shoved you into a door full of other possibilities with a man that can reciprocate the love you give.

It felt good... being treated like you mattered, like what you wanted was being given to you.

You can't believe that you're saying being abandoned is the best thing that's happened to you...

It's just you and him, in the snowy mountains, wrapped in each other's arms despite the cold never being a bother, yet the warmth you felt was blazing in a heart you didn't know you had.

And as the similar blue eyes worn by your creator pierced through the snowstorm and looked down on the two of you, his body tense and filled with an unexplainable frustration.

"It shouldn't be like this." He said through gritted teeth, no one but the sky to hear him.

It really shouldn't have been like that, because looking at you and him, you were smiling so brightly running back to Al after you gathered some pebbles and sticks for the snowman you were both making just outside your cave.

"What should we name out snowman guard?" You looked at your master lover, who was putting the details of the face on the snowman.

"I haven't the slightest idea what a good name for a snowman guard would be though." The man beside you chuckled, before rubbing off some snow that got on your face.

Around you, Al no longer felt as if he needed to steal another person's identity to be someone meaningful, he could just be him, and that was more than enough for you.

You know, he took up knitting recently, he got some guide books he found in campsites, gathered materials from many different sources, and he learned how to make warm clothes for you and him, one step closer to just being himself, finding out what he actually likes.

You held onto his wrist, leaning onto his touch. "Me neither." You said as a gentle whisper, "We should call him snowman guard for now and think of a name later."

Your life, despite living in the harsh climate of Dragonspine, seems so... domestic. And Albedo didn't like the growing feeling of envy stirring in his chest.

He created a perfect you, lying within the confines of his camp, always obidient, soft, never complaining, never getting into his other business, would do anything for him.

But as Albedo went back to his camp and looked in the eyes of a creation that looked exactly like you...

"Welcome back, Master." She sounded dull, no trace of excitement to see her master back, unlike you.

Her It's eyes was void of an imperfection that was actually what made you perfect.

Love... Emotion...

It was imperfect because it brought trouble, it's complicated, but it also brought the one feeling that both Albedos have always wanted...

To be loved.

But it would be wrong to take you back now, both for his morals and his pride.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

You smiled as you eased your hips down on his, you've never thought to be on top, to be the one in control.

Not only did your entire being scream submissive energy, but it was also how you embarrassingly run out of energy early on your session and have to rely on him to do the rest of the work by grabbing your butt and bouncing you on his cock as you lay on top of him with your face tucked snug on the crook of his neck.

Al would always find it so cute, especially after, when you get up again with a new found determination and try to go for a second round, only to end up stopping and asking for his help again since the first orgasm tired you out.

This time was a bit different though, your face was nuzzling on his bare chest, enjoying the warmth transferring on your cheeks, your hips were set on a slow but hard pace, making sure you both feel every inch of each other.

"I love you... I love you." You repeated those words many times, whether it be at intimate times like these, or lighthearted bonding times like building a snowman guard outside the cave, or exploring together, or cooking meals together.

He couldn't help but groan at the feeling of your pussy spasming around him, which led to the inevitable warm liquid spreading around his cock, before you halt your movement.

You looked up at him and pouted, trying to continue to make him cum with you, but you could only lift up your hips once before pathetically lying on him exhausted once again.

His deep chuckle sent shivers through your body, holding you carefully before flipping both of you over.

"I love you... So... Much... More." He said with such a loving gaze, matching his thrust with the words he spoke. You moaned in delight, raising your head up with your remaining strength to steal a kiss from his lips.

He deepened the kiss, his hips setting a bit of a faster pace before you felt a naughty smile form on his lips during the kiss.

As you parted, you held onto him as pleasure took over your entire body.

Truly, being abandoned was one of the best things that has happened to you. Second to being able to spend the rest of your life with the man making love to you right now.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

Ayyyeee, seven months late :D

[amaranthineoceans]

Everything Weird About Deltarune!

Spoiler Warning for Undertale and Both Chapters of Deltarune! Really! I Literally Go Through Everything I Can Remember About Them!

This is a long post so get comfortable. Also note that my brain doesn't process thoughts into words very well so some of these might not be worded in the best way. :)

Deltarune. The first teaser chapter was released on October 31, 2018, and it came out of nowhere. We've all gone through this, but I'll try and go through every single painstaking detail I can remember. Feel free to reblog and add/correct things.

The weirdness begins right off the bat. The title is an anagram of UNDERTALE. We all know Toby likes to use anagrams when he wants to indirectly tell us when things are related, so it's no surprise that when you go to download DELTARUNE, it warns you that the game is designed for people who have played UNDERTALE. You think, "Cool, so it's a sequel? Or maybe a prequel? A different perspective of UNDERTALE perhaps?" You were wrong; so terribly, terribly wrong! I'll elaborate on this later.

Before you download the application, the terms of service that you must agree to beforehand reads simply and plainly, "You accept everything that will happen from now on." This detail was kinda brushed off in the beginning, because, hey, it's Toby Fox. He does weird stuff all the time. But even in the first chapter, it's apparent that the concept of choice, or more accurately, the lack of it, is a very present theme in the game. I would like to remind you that Toby has announced that there will be one ending in the game. One. I'll elaborate on this later.

The program (as in, what the game is called in your files) is named SURVEY PROGRAM. Why not just call it Deltarune like it is when you download chapter two?

The game launches you, without a title screen, without any setting adjustment options, straight into a reference to the theme of the entire franchise: the lack of choice. A strange formless voice guides you through "making a vessel", with what we know now as a fountain in the background. You have the option to make some very disturbing choices in this character creator, such as making its favorite flavor "pain" or expressing your feelings about it with options such as "fear" and "disgust." You name your "creation," tell the formless voice your name (which is different from your vessel's name) and watch as said formless voice muses over your name at an agonizing pace. It thanks you for your time and tells you that your wonderful creation, (cue music cutout and background removal) will now be discarded. "No one can choose who they are in this world." The screen slowly turns white as the voice says, "Your... name... is..."

It gets weirder. The next scene appears from the whiteness and showcases Toriel calling "Kris" out of bed. Kris' area of the room is very bare in contrast to the other side, which we later discover is Asriel's.

It's Toriel. Why is Toriel here?

Kris is kind of an anagram of Frisk (the protagonist of UNDERTALE) but without the F. I highly doubt this is a coincidence.

Speaking with Noelle is the only reason you can proceed (see what i did there?) while finding a partner in the classroom. This means you can't go through the 1st chapter without knowing who she is. Is it because of the Snowgrave route?

Ralsei is just suspicious to me. There's no way he was just waiting in that castle his whole life alone without some mental toil. So either he's insane or he wasn't alone the whole time. What happened? Is it related to how he can close his eyes and see what Susie is going through when she's apart from the party? Was he just watching everything? Is he related to the formless voice?

Susie's icon is the only one without color in the Dark World.

Jevil's fight is more difficult than Sans'.

Your actions have little consequence in the first chapter. If you choose to go genocide, the only difference in the ending is being run out of the kingdom, and this doesn't carry over to the next chapter. Again, lack of choice, people.

If at the end of chapter one, you walk around town, it's mentioned (notably by Noelle) that you're usually not this talkative. If you go to the hospital and speak with the receptionist, they mention that you used to play the piano in the corner. If you decide to attempt to play the said piano, an out-of-key bash can be heard and the receptionist comments on how you used to play beautifully. If you try this in chapter two, the result is the same. All this is confirmation that Kris is acting noticeably weird.

When you leave the Dark World and walk around town, you can find Sans. He "pretends" to recognize you, and if you tell him you recognize him, he tells you it's funny, considering that you two have never met before. He winks. I'm pretty sure he knows that the player is there.

The mention of Papyrus in both games, but the purposeful lack of him. Like he's avoiding you.

If you go upstairs while inside Asgore's flower shop, there are flowers in glass cases resembling his SOUL collection in UNDERTALE. There's a red flower.

You can't enter the church.

The clock in the storage closet shows a different time than all the others in the school.

If you go all the way south in town and into the woods, the music stops and you come across a rusty, double door is in a hill covered in crass. It's locked. If you go this way in chapter two, however, you watch a cutscene where you and susie happen to find Monster Kid from UNDERTALE (or someone resembling them) and an owl kid in front of the door. The owl kid is pressuring Monster Kid to (presumably) break inside, telling them that they don't want to be a wimp like Kris. Does this imply that Kris is connected to this strange door somehow?

The ending. You know what I'm talking about.

Did Kris actually rip out the SOUL (I say "the" because I'm not entirely sure it's Kris') and knife because they wanted to eat the pie? Did they only eat the pie because Toriel caught them?

Why did they look at the player? Are they sick of being controlled? Is that why they freaked out after the Spamton fight? (later)

Anyway, now we're at chapter two.

DELTARUNE Chapter Two was released on September 17th, 2021. 17. Entry Number 17. Sound familiar?

Asriel's part of the room is different from the last chapter. I don't think this means anything sinister, but I think it means Kris notices different things about the room as the story progresses. My theory is that it will become more sinister in each chapter.

Ralsei getting super excited to see Susie and Kris after a day. As in he has separation anxiety and it breaks my heart. not anything suspicious but it makes me sad so it's on the list.

Kris and Susie's rooms. Ralsei REALLY doesn't want them to leave. Seriously get this boy a therapist. Or a stuffed animal. SOMETHING.

Kris having to gather everything from the storage closet so that people appear in the Dark World????? Why??????????????? They had to do the same thing for the computer lab too.

The golden door. I don't trust it.

How/why the heck did Noelle and Berdley go into the Computer Lab Dark World? I don't see either of them just walking into pulsing void doors without Susie.

Apparently the knight has been gone for a bit and can corrupt people's minds? The king in the first chapter doesn't seem like he can be redeemed but Queen just seems,,, not bad, but a little crazy. I wonder what happened.

Then again, name ONE person in this franchise without trauma.

Spamton.

Horror doesn't bother me. Spamton? Spamton bothers me.

SPAMTON. ENOUGH SAID.

A Kromer is a type of hat invented in the '70s. Nobody named Mike is associated with it, that I can find.

SPAMPTON. HOW DO I EVEN DESCRIBE IT.

HIS SONG IS THE ONLY ONE WITH WORDS.

The way he asks Kris is they want to be a heart on a chain their whole life. Like, dude, no wonder they were screaming after the fight.

WHERE DID THE YELLOW HEART COME FROM. YELLOW MEANS JUSTICE. WHY DOES JUSTICE APPLY.

Kris screaming after the fight and the player not being able to hear it. Don't you dare tell me that's just how the game is designed. There are sound effects characters make throughout the game. None that I can think of apply to Kris, apart from when they rip their soul out.

Ralsei brushing off the Spamton fight. Either that's his coping mechanism or he was trying to shut Susie and Kris up to protect them from... something. I'll touch on that in a minute.

According to Queen, DETERMINATION is a key factor in creating a fountain.

Also according to Queen, Kris, Noelle, and Susie all have DETERMINATION SOULS.

Ralsei freaking out about Berdley making a fountain implies that he may also have DETERMINATION. Why I'm bringing all this up will make sense soon.

How was Noelle able to cast Snowgrave... a spell that she, according to her, didn't know?

The Snowgrave route is so twisted.

You manipulate Noelle into killing Berdley and then, when you get back to the computer lab and investigate his corpse, the text box says that he doesn't seem to be awake. As if you're in denial?

Burgerpants recognizes you. Not Kris. As in the player.

The ending. I don't think I need to describe it. Kris is very methodical without the SOUL. (I say "the" because, again, I'm not 100% convinced it's theirs.) I'm saying this about how they left clues that someone broke into the This proves that they are NOT a mindless, vengeful husk.

HOW DID THEY MAKE THE FOUNTAIN WITHOUT THE SOUL INSIDE OF THEM. DID THEY FEED THE SOUL TO IT AFTERWARDS? IS THAT WHAT THAT WAS?

Another point I would like to make is my theory that Ralsei knows much more than he would have us believe. I might put this into a different post because I have yet to gather my points into a coherent bullet point list, so keep an eye out for that.

Anyway apart from Toriel and Susie being VERY heavy sleepers, I think I've gone through everything. I have a few theories.

1. Kris is possessed by the player and figured out that they could make a fountain from Queen and related to Spamton freaking out about freedom. They then decided to make a fountain going by the logic that "this would tick the player off." This is one of my top theories that assumes that the SOUL is theirs.

And 2. Kris is possessed by both the player and the knight. I think the formless voice at the very beginning of the game is the knight, and they somehow needed the player to possess someone with DETERMINATION. If so, then why Kris? We know from Queen that Noelle and Susie, and maybe even Berdley also have DETERMINATION. The most plausible thing I can think of is the fact that human souls are stronger than monster ones.

I do think that the popular theory (about the one that suggests that the Dark Word is nothing but a figment of a child's imagination, and the events that occur in said Dark World are simply children playing with toys) has been thoroughly dashed due to Berdley's murder in the genocide route of the second chapter. Unless he's not dead. Regardless, how the events (or lack thereof) that occur in the second chapter play through the next will be interesting, especially considering Toby's announcement about how there will be one ending to the game. So either Berdley isn't dead, or he will be.

Aaaand I think that's it! Sorry for the long post; let me know your thoughts and if I missed anything!

[ynnllsn]

Identity

Imposter Albedo x Reader.

All he felt is madness gushing through his very veins the moment he saw the in favor creation by the their mother. He's too gifted while he was discarded. It's so unfair. He felt unwanted for life.

He wonder what he did in his past life to be discarded and throw away just like that, so bitter, it's relying on his heart and wanted to be loved.

Not even an identity or name was give to him, he's a throw away thing.

He was given everything that was withheld upon him, knowledge, power, vission and guidance from his very own creator or by his mother. He felt devastated and angry for taking everything away from him. Because that should be his place to begin with

He felt shame for wanting to live, but he wanted to feel the joy of being brought in this world just like the infavor one.

"Alfredo?" upon hearing a sweet and gentle voice. "How you like the name?" his thoughts was cut, empty and stunned. He saw at the woman infront of him as he look away from the Alchemy notes that he stole.

"You said you don't have a name, don't you like it?"

"Names can be given by their creators, you're not my creator..."

"What a petty baby. Now now... If you don't like it then I'll-"

"I like it." he smiled... Alfredo doesn't sound so bad and will never be. He felt that something was bestowed upon him when, it meant alot to his heart. Your eyes widened to see a tear flow from his eyes.

Up all the unwanted people he encountered, you stand alone... Ever since he met you, you stick up yourself to him eversince. Even if he told her that he's not a good person, she doesn't think of it otherwise. You catch up quickly when he told you that he doesn't have an Identity.

You went beside him and hugged him. He hugged you back. Tears starts to form in your eyes as well as you rub his back. Your chest went up and down.

"You're not alone anymore, Alfredo... You have me... Although all I could give is my guidance-"

"It's enough.. I am greatful. Thank you, Y/N."

All he wanted is to be accepted... From this world, from you. And you did. He will treasure and protect you for dear life... If he lose you, then it means he lose his sanity.

[childishfluff]

The Feeling Of Family- A MCYT Agere/CGLRE fic (Regressors!SBI+Tubbo and Ranboo, Carer!Philza)

There was a very specific feeling that came to Ranboo when he met up with his internet friends. A weirdly comforting feeling, a reassurance that he had finally found his people.

It came to him with every hug from Tubbo, every teasing ruffle of his hair from Techno, every inappropriate joke he shared with Tommy. It clouded his mind every time he regressed with them, too, he didn't quite know how to describe it. But if he had to put a name to this odd emotion, he'd call it 'the feeling of family'.

A/N: get ready for a looooong ride. This was written over the course of two days, I really hope you guys like it! I haven't dropped a fic thats over 4000 words in a bit, I think. This is inspired loosely by Cypherr's (on ao3!!) fic 'four's a family', that's where I got the idea of Phil just being overwhelmed because there's so many babies to deal w/, so I'm crediting them! Though, this fic is much different then their's, but also please go read their fics they're great- anyways, I hope you enjoy! This fic is kinda (?) in Ranboo's pov (third person but like,,,you see his thoughts), but there's so much going on that it kinda feels like it's jumping around? Sorry for that, I'm used to writing w/a 2 littles max per caregiver ratio, so this was different. I've also never written Phil as a caregiver before besides his brief appearance over in my 'Mister Nook' series. okay I'm done rambling,,,enjoy the fic please!

--

There was a very specific feeling that came to him when he met up with his friends. A weirdly comforting feeling, a reassurance that he had finally found his people.

In an internet dad, a fellow faceless streamer who used a pig as his icon, a song writer, a bee-loving teenager, and another who was known for wearing red and white. He felt just a bit out of place in this dynamic, SBI were the ones that were close. SBI plus Tubbo wasn't an odd pairing either, and it almost seemed as if Ranboo was only there because Tubbo was.

But that doubt seemed to wash away with the welcoming energy that the car ride to Phil and Kristin's home was filled to the very brim with. Tommy and Wilbur arguing like brothers while Ranboo and Tubbo joked about. The half-joking stern look that Phil gave him through the rear view mirror when he made an inappropriate joke. The soft feeling that Techno teasingly ruffling his hair left in his chest.

This group felt like family.

Of course, he had a perfectly good set of parents back home, but this was different. In a good way, though. This home wasn't his, it was Phil's, but he was surprisingly comfortable here. He was comfortable with his close friends.

"Breakfast is ready!"

He jolted awake with a slight shock when he heard knocking and shouting outside of the door of the room he was staying in, the noise startling him from his sleep. He rubbed at his eyes and stretched his arms above his head as the sleepiness started fading from his mind, clocking the voice as Tommy's as he processed his surroundings. It was his second day at the Philza Minecraft's, the first being made up of mostly content creation.

They had all been shown to their respective guest rooms late last night after quite a few movies and a half-asleep conversation full of laughing and heartfelt emotions. Today was supposed to be a chill day, and the next they'd be exploring the area just around Phil and Kristen's home. It was Ranboo's second time in the UK, and just like last time, he wanted to explore and get a feel for the place he'd be temporarily living in.

He fished some clothes out of his suitcase, pulling them on and discarding his pajamas in a white laundry hamper he had been given for that exact purpose. Then, he sat on the bed, pulling out his phone and scrolling through it. He chuckled as he saw a picture of their entire group with a fan they had run into the day prior, just after he was picked up from the airport, remembering how many similar ones had been taken during his last meet up.

He thought back to the months he spent at Tubbo's house just a while ago, it was one of the funnest parts of his life if he was honest, and now he was right back in the UK for another long meet up. This one was supposed to be a month, at least. SBI and the Bee Duo all under one roof for an entire month! Twitter had freaked out completely when they heard of this arrangement.

During his last trip to the UK, he found out something interesting after revealing something about himself to Tubbo. He admitted to his habit of age regressing to his friend during a late night conversation, only to be met with a 'me too' and then being asked if he wanted to call some friends. This response had confused him, but he said agreed, figuring that there had to be some logic to this.

And after an hour long conversation with Techno, Tommy, Wilbur, and Phil, he learned about an ongoing secret dynamic between the group. Tommy, Tubbo, Phil, and Wilbur were all also regressors. This was a lot of information to process at around 6 am during an all-nighter, but he was glad to know he wasn't alone.

Almost immediately after finding out about his headspace, Phil insisted on taking care of him, messaging him more often and helping him regress over video calls. And over the process of a few weeks, Ranboo had been officially added to the group of littles Phil cared for regularly.

The man took the time to learn his headspace range, things that upset him, how to deal with him when he did misbehave (though the occasion was rare, especially compared to someone like Little Tommy), all in the name of making sure he was cared for. It was sweet, really, and sometimes the boy felt bad for all the man did for him.

He pushed these thoughts away as he heard his name called by his father figure from the kitchen. He groaned, exiting off of Twitter and making his way out of the room and down the hallway, through the living room and into the kitchen. "I'm coming, I'm coming," he mumbled, still tired. He took his seat between Tommy and Tubbo after entering the kitchen/dining area and was quite overwhelmed with the amount of greetings and 'good morning!'s' he got all at once.

"How'd you sleep, hun?" he smiled when he heard Kristin's voice, humming a bit, settling on responding to her instead of facing the rest of the ongoing chaos in the kitchen.

"Pretty good, I think. Still waking up, though," he admitted. He watched the woman bring a plate over to him, setting a stack of pancakes in front of him. "Thank you."

Before she got the chance to respond, Tommy was shouting all to loud for how early it was in the morning. He sounded whiny, too. "Why does he get his first? I was awake before him," he complained, earning a response from Wilbur as he entered the room, his obviously messy hair temporarily contained by a beanie.

"Maybe because he's not throwing a fit over everything like you are," He made his way over to the table as Phil shot the both of them a look. Ranboo minded his own business, digging into his food, he knew that he wasn't in trouble. The brown haired man sat next to Tommy, leaning back in his seat casually.

"Will, be nicer to your brother. And Tommy, be patient, or else both of you will be put in timeout the moment we finish eating." he threatened, half joking.

"What?" Tommy said, sounding shocked as his eyes went wide.

"I second that, none of us are little!" Tubbo finally spoke up after laughing at the situation the whole time.

"Tom-tom here is sure acting like a baby, though," Wilbur teased, sitting back up to ruffle the blond's hair, continuing even when the younger whined and attempted to shove his hand away. He only retracted it when Phil gave him another stern look.

"Stop teasing him and eat your food," he told him as Kristin brought over plates for Tommy and Wilbur. "Where's Techno?" Phil seemed like he wanted to continue talking to Wilbur, but was distracted when he noticed that someone was missing. Wilbur smirked, sticking his tongue out to Tommy, as if bragging about being let off the hook.

Even Ranboo could admit, even out of headspace, everyone seemed to fill their roles in the family dynamic well. Wilbur was the cocky middle brother who somehow simultaneously gets in the most trouble and gets away with everything, Techno is the oldest who's mostly calm but will join in on the antics when it seems fun, and Tommy's the youngest who will play the 'innocent' card at any chance he could get.

Ranboo and Tubbo's exact roles were a bit undecided, but they seemed to consist of a lot of watching the scene play out and somehow getting dragged into an argument they had nothing to do with. Phil acted as their dad, who kept peace between everyone and tried to keep things calm, while Kristen played the role of a sweet mother-type figure.

When they were little, it was a bit different, but the general feeling of family remained the same.

After a few chaotic minutes of gathering everyone up and calming everyone down, they were all sitting around the table and talking in a much more civil manner. Things got loud once again only a few minutes later when Tommy knocked over his cup of orange juice.

"Sorry!" he squeaked, "I didn't mean to!" he defended, looking up at Phil apologetically. He immediately seemed much younger, a light pout on his lips as he apologized for his clumsiness.

"It's alright, Toms." the man assured, flashing a soft smile to let the regressor know that he was alright, reaching for the paper towels across the table. In just a few moments it was like there was never a spill in the first place. "Can you get him a sippy cup, please?" he asked Kristin, who immediately set off to get the requested item.

"I told you he was a baby," Wilbur spoke up next, predictably earning protests from the clearly regressing boy next to him.

"I'm not a baby!" the younger cried, looking to his other  "Techno, tell him I'm not a baby!"

"I mean, only babies need sippy cups," the other man leaned a bit closer the table, his words causing the teenager's eyes to widen.

"Can't Kristin just refill dis one?" he questioned, holding up the cup he had knocked over and looking to Phil hopefully.

"Sorry, buddy, I just don't want you to make another mess." Phil sighed, shooting a disappointed look towards Wilbur and Techno. Ranboo sunk further into his seat, trying to avoid getting pulled into the conflict. He wasn't sure how the others could handle Phil's 'disappointed look' so easily, the boy was very much scared of it.

"I'm not gonna!" Tommy whined, practically glaring at the cup that was set in front of him a moment later. He huffed and crossed his arms, refusing to drink or eat anything.

"This is what happens when you make fun of him, he gets all insecure and stubborn," Tubbo groaned, rolling his eyes as if they had been through this process a million times over.

"Tubbo's right, apologize to him," the oldest man ordered. Wilbur and Techno looked at him as if this suggestion was completely outrageous, so he added, "Now."

"Okay, okay!" Wilbur gave in, sounding defensive, "I'm sorry, Toms. You're not a baby."

"Really?" he lowered his arms, finally uncrossing them.

"No, you're just clumsy and we're sorry for making fun of you for it," Techno sounded very reluctant, but he followed Phil's orders. After these apologies, the rest of breakfast went fairly smoothly. By the end of it, Tommy was very obviously fully regressed and making a useless attempt to hide it.

It was a fairly often occurrence that Tommy slipped just for fun, acting and being treated like a kid was something he just liked. He got to be the annoying little brother and watch cartoons while he did it, it was a win-win across the board.

But Phil and Kristin knew, that whenever one of them slipped over their voice chats, anyone else in the discord call would too. And now, they were all actually together under one roof, so he was sure he'd have five littles to deal with by noon at latest.

--

As predicted, all of the boys ended up in littlespace, slipping one after another like a line of dominoes getting knocked over. After some reassurance from Phil, Tommy allowed himself to slip, and he dragged his best friend into a game of pretend. And the two toddler minded teenagers decided they wanted to play with Techno and Ranboo as well, and Wilbur soon followed when Phil babied him a bit to much.

At first, it was quite loud, and there was a lot of conflict and disagreements between the boys. Eventually, after everyone but Ranboo had managed to get in some sort of trouble, Phil sat the boys down to watch cartoons. Tommy, Tubbo, and Wilbur were out like a light one episode in. Wilbur was in babyspace, he always needed extra sleep, and Tommy tired himself out by crying when he assumed Phil was upset with him.

Tubbo, however, was just tired. No excuse, that's just how he was sometimes.

Ranboo and Techno were older then the rest of them, and far more behaved, so they didn't get quite as much attention earlier in the day. Phil was quite busy comforting Wilbur and trying to keep Tommy and Tubbo in check, and it didn't help that Kristin had to leave the house. To make up for this, Phil wanted to do something special with them while the other three took their mid-day naps.

After a while of Ranboo and Techno watching cartoons, trying to stay quiet so that their friends could sleep peacefully, Phil spoke up.

"Boys, quietly follow me," he whispered, managing to get out from under from where Wilbur was laying cuddling up to him without waking the boy up. Techno and Ranboo glanced at each other, seemingly confused but intrigued. They scrambled to get up, following their caregiver into the kitchen.

"What are we doin', dada?" Techno questioned once they entered the other room. They had left the cartoons on, so Phil was fairly sure they wouldn't be able to hear what was going on in the kitchen.

"You guys are gonna be my little helpers for snack time, okay? I got some special treats and such for everyone and we need to put everything together before everyone gets up!" the man explained in a quiet but excited tone, speaking even quieter as if his next words were a secret, "And if you guys do a good job, I'll even give you an extra cookie."

Ranboo's face immediately lit up, and he bounced on his feet as he awaited more instructions. Phil specifically chose him and Techno out of all of them, they must be special. It was like a super secret mission, just for them!

"So we're all gonna have fruit and vegetables before we get to the sweets," he continued on, going over the fridge and pulling out various fruits and vegetables, "Techno, could you wash the strawberries and blueberries for me?" he asked.

"Mhm!" he agreed, excited to be able to help. It seem weird that Phil's idea of "something special" was just putting them to work, it was more about the idea of making them feel special. They were more well behaved then everyone else, so they got extra time with Phil and a cookie.  

"What do I get to do?" Ranboo questioned. He watched as Technoblade took the containers with the fruit he was told to wash over to the sink.

"Are you big enough to pour drinks for everyone?" he questioned, pulling various new sippycups and bottles from a hidden spot in one of the cabinets. The two littles gasped, completely distracted from their tasks, "Yes, some of these are for you two." he chuckled at their excitement, coming over to Ranboo and holding out a simple but cute black and white sippy cup.

"I thought maybe you could put stickers on it," Phil explained. The boy nodded quickly, practically attacking him in a hug. "Okay, go on, get to work now." he said, motioning over to the counter where the rest of them sat.

As requested, they got to work. Techno helped wash the fruit and put then on their plates, while Ranboo filled the sippy cups and bottles with whatever drink each one of them liked best. His demise came when he tried to sneak soda into his sippy cup without asking, and he managed to spill it all over the counter.

"Uh oh! Spill on aisle Ranboo!" Phil joked, grabbing the paper towels and running over to help. Immediately, the boy panicked. He was the well behaved one, and Phil was gonna find out that he was trying to be sneaky! His guilt was obviously clear to the caregiver, because the next thing he said was, "Don't worry, accidents happen."

The gentle and reassuring tone he used only made him feel worse. It only took the man a moment to actually realize what the boy had been pouring into the cup. "Ranboooo," the caregiver held out his words, sounding disappointed, "You know that you could've asked for soda if you really wanted it, right? You've been so good all day, I would've given it to you."

"Really?" he asked, pouting when the man took the cup and dumped the liquid in the sink. He then ripped paper towels from the roll and wiped up the remainder of the drink from the counter.

"Yeah, I would've," Phil affirmed, "But trying to sneak around me isn't okay. You told me you were putting juice in here. That's lying, and I know for a fact that you're big enough to know that's not allowed. " he tsked, causing Ranboo to look down at his feet.

"M' sorry," he mumbled, ready to cry over such a small thing. He knew what he was doing was dumb, Phil rarely let them have sweets like that when they were small due to the fact that they got hyper.

"Don't cry, sweetheart, you're not in trouble," the man assured with a sigh, softening his tone immediately, rinsing the cup out as he spoke. Ranboo still felt bad, despite the gentle reassurance. He glanced up to see the man filling his cup with his favorite drink besides the over sugary soda: strawberry lemonade. "Here you go." he tightened the lid onto it and held it out for him.

"Sorry, dada," he apologized again, his eyes still glassy as he took it in his hands. Phil sighed a bit, opening his arms and pulling him close.

"You're okay, buddy, I promise you." he spoke gently, "Little boys make mistakes sometimes, it's alright." The man knew that while Ranboo might've been regressed to an older age, he was still quite sensitive, and he always felt overly bad whenever he got in trouble. Even if he had managed to get away with sneaking the soda, he would've owned up to what he did guiltily after just a few sips of the drink.

That's just how he was.

"M' all done!" Techno's voice interrupted them as he finished placing the snack-filled plates in their spot at the table, besides their respective sippy cups. Phil pulled away from the other regressor and ruffled his hair, smiling at him before addressing the other little.

"Good job, honey. You're such a good helper," he complimented, before looking back to Ranboo. "And so are you." he reminded. Ranboo giggled a bit, feeling happiness well up in his chest at the praise despite any childish guilt. The giggles only increased when his caregiver tapped the button of his nose, causing him to scrunch it up.

Once he was sure that Ranboo was alright, or at least doing a bit better, he gave them their next instructions. One good thing about Ranboo was that it was easy to sway his emotions to the more positive end if it was done before any tears came. "Take your seats and eat, I'm gonna wake up your brothers and have them pick up their toys from earlier, then they'll join you." he told them, before leaving the room.

Technoblade's eyes followed Phil as he exited the room, and he waited until he was sure he was out of earshot to say anything. "Psst, 'anboo," Techno leaned close to the table, grabbing the other boy's attention.

"Wha'?" he questioned, popping a grape in his mouth and tilting his head in curiousity.

"We should scare daddy when he comes back in! It'll be so cool," he suggested, "We can wait by the door and jump out!"

"Hmm...," Ranboo looked over to where the other pointed, considering his options, "We 'posed to be eatin'." he pointed out, shaking his head.

"We won' get in trouble, it's just playin' round," he tried to sound convincing. It seemed to work, because Ranboo reconsidered, before hesitantly nodding. He grabbed one more grape and his sippy cup before standing up, Techno leading him over to the entrance of the room. They were concealed behind the wall on either side of the doorway.

They listened Phil woke the others up and helped them put the toys away, excitement ramping up as they waited. To their shock, Tommy entered first, fully ready to greet him in his usual loud tone. Techno quickly put his finger to his lip, shaking his head to signal him to be quiet. Tommy's eyes widened as he realized what was happening, deciding to duck behind the with his older brother.

It was then that Phil entered, carrying Wilbur. The boys jumped out from their spots, exclaiming different variations of "boo!" and "AHH!", breaking out into giggles immediately after. Wilbur squeaked, the sound startling him a bit, but he didn't seem upset. "Well hello, little ones," Phil chuckled, "If I remember correctly, you boys are supposed to be at the table."

"Jus' wanted to scare you! We go eat now," Techno assured, taking Tommy's wrist in his hand and pulling him over to the table. Ranboo however, peeked behind Phil to see if Tubbo was coming.

"Where Tubs at?" he pulled on Phil's shirt before he could walk away, whining a bit.

"He had a bit of an accident," the man admitted, "He's a bit smaller now, but he'll be out soon, okay?"

"Okay..." he trailed off, looking out into the living room, completely set on standing there until his best friend was able to join him.

"How about you head over to the table, kiddo?" his caregiver questioned, earning a pout from the little. "Okay, okay, you can wait here for him!" he decided, figuring there was nothing wrong with it. With a forehead kiss, Phil left him at the doorway.

"Tubbo! We gots apple slices for you!" he rambled excitedly when his friend finally did arrive, running towards him and grabbing his hand. He started to pull him further into the kitchen, but the mentally younger of the two stumbled a bit, seemingly clumsier then he was earlier in the day.

Ranboo realized that he had a pacifier in his mouth now, and he saw Phil replacing his sippy cup with a bottle out of the corner of his eye. He had worked hard to put apple juice in that sippy cup, he thought, pouting a bit.

"M' sorry, didn' mean to make you almost fall! We can go slow," he decided, earning a thankful smile from the other regressor. "Are you gonna say anything?" he asked, walking beside him. As they approached the table, Phil replied for the boy.

"He's a bit younger, bud, he might not be up for talking," he explained, "You know what it's like to be so little that you feel like a baby. Can we all be understanding? He's only a bit older then Wilbur at the moment." "

Tubbo seemed quite embarrassed as he sunk into his seat, pulling his pacifier from his mouth to eat his food. There were sounds of agreement around the table. Ranboo was curious as to what exactly made Tubbo slip so much younger then he usually did, but he didn't voice this curiosity, settling on eating his food in favor of not embarrassing his friend anymore then he already was. .

"These are yucky!" Tommy claimed, pushing his plate with carrots and ranch away from him.

"You like carrots and ranch, what are you talking about?" Phil sounded tired and just a bit annoyed.

"Don' want em," he shook his head, whining just as he had that morning when Wilbur teased him.

"If you eat them you'll get a cookie," the caregiver bribed.

"What type of cookie?" the toddler minded boy squinted his eyes, as if considering this, as if it was a negotiation of sorts.

"Sugar cookie, chocolate chip, I think we have Oreos too...whatever you could want," this definitely caught the boys interest.

"Chocolate chip?" his eyes went wide with excitement, which was only intensified when Phil nodded. Immediately, he uncrossed his arms and pulled his plate back towards him. Phil seemed satisfied with this, ruffling his hair.

The boys were still waking up, so Phil asked them to talk about their elaborate games from earlier in the day to keep them occupied. So, as they ate their snacks, they giggled about imaginary wars and adventures and argued over who won their dramatic plastic sword duels. Eventually, the caregiver gave them their promised sweets before sending them back off to play.

"Ranboo, you left your sippy cup in the kitchen," Phil tapped the boy's shoulder and distracted him from his game of peek-a-boo with Tubbo. He quickly discovered that his friend seemed much to little to participate in any games he'd usually play, so he did what he always saw Phil do with Wilbur: play a simpler one.

It was obviously much more entertaining for the littler of the two, but Ranboo was happy to hear his friend's giggles and squeaks. "Oh! Thanks, dada!" the boy reached up to take his sippy cup from the caregiver as he was sitting on the floor and Phil was standing. Ranboo gasped when he took a drink, feeling bubbles on his tongue.

Immediately, Phil put a finger to his lips and gave him a warning look. This made the boy giggle a bit as he nodded, understanding the signal. "Thank you!" he repeated, smiling when his hair was ruffled softly. The moment didn't last long, Tommy called Phil over for something, and it was back to peek-a-boo with his best friend.

Ranboo didn't mind it, though, peek-a-boo was fun. Being with everyone was fun, even if it meant he got a bit less attention due to there being so much going on. It all evened out, he got to be a snack time helper! And he got an extra cookie! If you asked him, that was pretty awesome.

In the next few days, they'd all get back into making more collaborative content, as that was the point of this meet up, but for now, it was just time to play. To spend time together, to cuddle, and giggle, and make far to much noise in the name of fun. To just be a family.

That was the specific feeling that came to Ranboo with this meet up. The comforting feeling that bubbled in his chest whenever he got a forehead kiss or his hair ruffled by Phil, or when he played babyish games with his friends when they regressed younger then him.

This was the thing that clouded his mind whenever he regressed with this group specifically, or when they were in the car, joking about anything and everything as they got closer and closer to their destination. A feeling that consistently made his life better, the feeling that brought a smile to his face everyday...

The Feeling of Family.

--

A/N: I really hope you liked that adorable mess of 4500 words! I appreciate reblogs and likes, but no matter what, thanks for reading to the end! Did you like the chaotic feeling that five littles/so many people brought into my fic? I kinda had to switch up my normal formulas to make room for so many characters, there's a reason I literally put three character to sleep halfway through the fic hjsikajsa. Did I write Phil well? I tried to portray how a caregiver w/so many littles would act somewhat realistically? Kind of overwhelmed but managing. Also, did you like me portraying ranboo as 'the angle little' of the group? idk I felt like it fit his personality in the scenario. If you reply with/send an ask/reblog with feedback, you can answer those questions, leave a request for something (whether it be in the universe father into the month-long meetup timeline I set up or just another fic), state your general opinions on the fic, or just leave a strand of emojis if words are hard. No matter what, it means a lot! I hope you all have a great day!!!!

[dhwty-writes]

On the Benefits of Trancing

This is a bit late, but was in fact written for Day 2 of sgtober, Can't Sleep. It's very fluffy, have fun reading! 

Summary: There are several reasons why Essek prefers trancing over sleeping. Firstly, as difficult as it may be to leave yourself vulnerable for eight hours at a time, he finds it even more challenging to imagine his friends defenceless. Secondly, sleep, inevitably, will give birth to dreams. And no matter if they are foul or fair, they torture him all the same. And lastly, well—.Essek reminisces about the strange habit of sleeping and his even stranger habit of sharing his bed with Caleb whenever he can't sleep.

Warnings: None, as far as I’m aware

Read on AO3

Sleep is a curious thing, Essek muses, that he doesn't understand and hasn't particularly cared for up until this point. It is a childish thing, and wild and vulnerable and oh-so terribly time consuming. Truth be told, for most of his life he has pitied the other races who are forced to bow to the whims of nature in that way.

Like so many things, that changed when he met the Mighty Nein. Well, not when he met them necessarily—back then he may or may not have been quietly plotting their demise for returning his carefully stolen beacons—but certainly when he started travelling with them.

As many aspects of elven cultures are, trancing is a solitary activity, a silent contemplation of one's most private thoughts to better cope with them. Shock and surprise don't even begin to cover his feelings when Caleb first cast his dome and Essek found out that sleeping, as many things for the Mighty Nein, is a rather communal event.

He had eight whole hours to come to terms with those implications—did they not realise what it meant, the trust one had to place in another to sleep in front of them? Did they not care? Or did they, by some miracle, in fact trust him that much?

When he came out of his trance the next morning, he realised some of the members of the Nein had moved during the night, curling closer to and around each other. Cuddling, they called it, and Essek's pity melted away, turning into something more bitter, more poisonous. Envy.

There is something about sitting upright, floating a few inches off the ground while surrounded by people holding each other that can make you feel so incredibly lonely, and that has to say something. Nearly a century of solitude spent between too-large, too-empty towers, too-secretive and too-pious schools, and a too-scheming and too-paranoid court have never left him feeling as isolated and bereft as that morning with the Nein did.

Of course, back then he didn't have the words to describe the feelings swirling in his chest. Nor did he have the words to ask for them to include him in their affections, lest he be presumptuous. That, to quote Caleb Widogast, takes time. Surprisingly little of it, if he is perfectly honest.

A few months down the line, he stopped floating while trancing and when he resurfaced the next morning, he found himself leaning against Fjord, who had taken the last watch. When he jerked away in embarrassment, Fjord blinked awake, too, a disgruntled look on his face, growling that he should stop moving around so much.

Despite his shame, Essek complied and held completely still until the rest of the Nein woke up. After that, he began to dabble into the casual intimacy his friends share. He even tried to sleep, occasionally.

In the beginning, he felt very self-conscious about it. He would wake up with messy hair, or drool on his pillow, or, worst of all, tucked close to Caleb. Another effect of the Mighty Nein, though, is that they very quickly rid you of your sense of shame. So, he no longer cares if he looks a mess, if his clothes are rumpled, or if he's getting spit on Veth's backpack. Just the last thing he can't help but feel embarrassed about.

There are several reasons why he still prefers trancing, though. Firstly, as difficult as it may be to leave yourself vulnerable for eight hours at a time, he finds it even more challenging to imagine his friends defenceless. He much prefers being able to watch over them for at least half of that time.

Secondly, sleep, inevitably, will give birth to dreams. And if sleep is childish, wild, and vulnerable, dreams are tenfold so. He often contemplates his crimes during his trances, as well as the discarded timelines, the lost possibilities that could have led to even more death, destruction, and despair. He frequently considers members of the Assembly lording their victory over him, disposing of him, torturing his friends. However, in his trance, he can choose to abandon these timelines. Dreams offer no such luxury. Once in their cruel grasp, you have no choice but to see them through.

Nightmares are one thing, but dreams are another. Even the pleasant ones often come unbidden, worming themselves through his subconscious to pluck out— What exactly Essek should call them, he isn't sure. He wouldn't dare name them wishes or hopes, for that would imply a certain level of possibility for them to come true. These visions are desires, more like, though that term implies a certain passion that does not fit the circumstance.

These unsought fantasies often include the Mighty Nein, years or decades from now. How they would still seek him out, include him in their midst. He dreams of feasts and festivals, of hugs and humour, of truthfulness and trust. And then there are other, even more forbidden dreams featuring him and Caleb. He dreams of soft kisses and gentle caresses, lazy nights spent in the tower reading books, of research and adventures and normalcy, of waking up as close to each other every day as they do from time to time on accident. He would love his future to look like this, but he knows there is a very little chance for that.

So, no matter if the dreams are foul or fair, they torture him all the same.

And lastly, well—

There is a knock on his door and Essek's heart lurches. "Come in," he calls as calmly as he can manage, forcing himself to slowly close the book he hasn't been reading instead of slamming it shut and scrambling to his feet.

The door opens silently, as all doors within the tower do, and Caleb slips inside. He's wearing simple sleeping clothes and Essek silently curses himself for already closing the book, so he can't even pretend to read that instead. "I, ah— I'm sorry for intruding... again," Caleb says, self-consciously tugging at his sleeves. "I hope I didn't wake you?"

"Not at all," he answers, barely keeping himself from saying: 'I was waiting up.' Instead, he opts for: "I was still reading."

"Anything interesting?"

"Are you trying to tell me that you have stored uninteresting books in your mind, Caleb Widogast?"

"Plenty," he deadpans and Essek chuckles.

"It's called The Creation of Silver." He turns the plain cover over to Caleb, to jog his memory. Based on what he could gather by skimming the first pages, it promises to be a rather run of the mill romance novel following the story of a Dwendalian noble trying to escape their arranged marriage. "So far, I find it quite entertaining."

"Ah, yes." Caleb quickly glances away, a faint blush colouring his cheeks. "Have you reached the part where Stefan leaves for the city yet?"

"I have not."

"Then I will not spoil you." Another tug on his sleeve. "The plot really picks up at that point."

Essek tilts his head to the side, studying Caleb. According to the clock in his room, it is past midnight, which is quite late for the human to still be awake. Yet, he is just hovering in his doorway, caught between stepping inside and leaving again. "I presume you did not come here to discuss my evening reading matter."

"Ah..." He tugs at his sleeves again. "No, I did not." As always, Caleb is as incapable of voicing his needs as Essek is.

Thankfully, Essek is not nearly as apprehensive when it comes to his friends' well-being as he is when his own is concerned. "Should you have trouble sleeping, you know you are more than welcome to stay. Seeing as we are to make progress tomorrow, I am very invested in you having a restful night."

Not being able to sleep is another thing about that practice that Essek cannot understand. Trancing is a matter of will, discipline, and tranquillity and he's always assumed sleep to be the same. He supposes it is, to some degree.

But travelling with the Mighty Nein, and Caleb specifically, has taught him that you cannot force sleep. There are circumstances under which they will toss and turn for hours, unable to find rest. Not even Beau's meditation, which he considered relatively close to his trance, seemed capable to calm a disturbed mind enough for sleep.

He has, however, also discovered that for certain members of the Mighty Nein, certain methods will accomplish the necessary peace of mind. Caduceus' tea appears to be able to work miracles, time and time again. Beauregard likes to tire herself out by running drills, while Jester usually draws in her sketchbook. Yasha tends to make flower crowns or, lacking flowers, braid other people's hair. Essek has been subjected to that numerous times so far and despite his aversion to Dynasty braids, he doesn't hate it. Fjord usually ties sailor's knots, and Veth sorts through her various collections.

Caleb, though? Caleb, for some reason, only needs another person to fall asleep next to. And for some reason, despite the numerous options he has, he chooses Essek more often than not. Not that he's complaining, of course. In fact, he may enjoy it a little too much.

Caleb laughs quietly as he often does at their antics. They have long since learned the rules to this strange game they are playing. "Well, if you put it like this..." he says as he rids himself of his slippers—Hausschuhe, he has explained to Essek, a very important part of Zemnian culture—and puts them next to Essek's. "I would hate to disappoint you, Herr Thelyss."

'You couldn't,' he thinks as he pulls back the covers. Instead, he says: "Indeed." As always, he freezes in place when Caleb joins him on the bed, scooting closer until they are nearly touching. Being this close to each other is not getting any less mortifying, no matter how long it has been since Caleb first came knocking on his door.

He still remembers that night in vivid detail. As so often, Essek has been reading and just got up to get a cup of tea. When he stepped out of his rooms, he nearly collided with a wizard who had convinced himself that his suffering wasn’t important enough to trouble him with. “Do you want to come in?” he said to his own surprise. To his even bigger surprise, Caleb accepted.

They sat on Essek’s couch and talked about everything and nothing at once. Hours later, with his throat gone dry, Essek asked: “Shouldn’t you be asleep by now?” The moments the words left his mouth he knew he’d said something wrong.

Caleb shot to his feet as if burned and Essek followed suit. “I am so sorry, friend. I will not continue to disturb you any—”

“Where are you going?” he interrupted him, perhaps a little irritated. “Give me some credit, Caleb Widogast; I am capable of far subtler ways to rid myself of an unwelcome visitor. Which you are not.”

He laughed self-consciously and said: “Regardless, I should go and rest. Schlaf gut, Herr Thelyss.”

“You could stay,” he blurted out before he could stop himself. “I mean—I noticed your sleep to be more restful when you are around others. I am aware that I am not your first choice, but since the others are not here—You’re welcome to stay, if it at all helps.”

Caleb hesitated. “Are you sure?”

“Certainly.”

“In Ordnung,” he answered finally. Essek is still glad he had thought to float for that conversation. That way, at least, his knees didn’t give out.

A short discussion about who should take the bed followed before they stubbornly agreed to share it. Essek came to regret that immediately after when he was confronted with the practical implications of ‘sharing a bed’.

“Make yourself at home,” he said. Caleb took some time to rearrange the pillows and blankets—just like he does now—while Essek hovered nearby. Literally.

It took several reminders from Caleb for Essek to not instinctively recast his floating cantrip, but eventually they managed to lie down next to each other with a minimal amount of awkwardness. They have moved past that initial apprehensiveness by now, Essek thinks while he pretends to read. Shortly after, Caleb flops down, close enough that Essek can feel his breath ghosting over his cheeks.

“Good night, Caleb Widogast,” Essek says, stubbornly staring at the pages and nowhere else. "Do you want me to dim the lights?" He doesn't need them anyways; he just likes to appreciate the room Caleb made for him in all of its colours.

"No, I think I would like to read a bit. I am quite fond of that book."

"You are?" Essek looks down to him in surprise. ‘If Caleb tilts his head,’ the thought hits him, ‘he could rest it on my shoulder.’ He just thought it to be one of the countless books Caleb has read in his life, nothing special. "Why?"

He blushes again. "Ah— I think you'll see. The title is more literal than one would assume."

He considers the book once more, trying to discern what Caleb means with his words. ‘Luxon help me,’ he sends a silent prayer. It wouldn’t be the first time for him to pick up a romance novel that turns out to be quite a bit more explicit than anticipated. To think that such a mistake may have happened to him with Caleb so close—He thinks he might just combust from embarrassment.

"Do you mind flipping the page?" Caleb asks with a yawn, startling Essek out of his thoughts.

"Oh, of course," he says belatedly and turns the page. He hasn't read the last one yet, but nor has he read the one before, so it hardly matters. The novel has a rather shallow plot, so he has no trouble picking it up three pages later, and he's done so by design.

“Thank you.” He yawns again, louder this time and burrows down further into his pillows. “Gute Nacht, mein Schatz,” he mumbles and freezes as if he only now realises what he said. He seems to wait for an answer, but when Essek fails to provide a wrong one, he just smiles up at him and says: “Schlaf wohl und g’sund, bis morgen früh’s Kaffeele kommt.”

“I don’t understand you,” Essek tells him just as quietly, “but you can translate tomorrow.” After a moment of hesitation, he adds in Undercommon: “Sweet dreams, my dear. I’ll be here when you wake up.” He quickly glances back at his book before he can do anything stupid. Such as regret his words. Or kiss him goodnight.

Still, with Caleb reading along he does his best to at least somewhat read the novel. It’s a very flowery language, occasionally dropping Zemnian words Essek doesn’t know. Judging by Caleb’s grumbling at least some of them appear to be wrong. The protagonist, Stefan, seems like quite the bore. He does have a strong motivation, he supposes, to escape from the dreary life that awaits him in his arranged marriage. Besides that, and his general cold-hearted demeanour, he can’t discern any defining characteristics.

He finally reaches the part Caleb asked him about—Stefan leaving for the big city—when another character is introduced, presumably his love interest. He appears to be about as compelling as the protagonist, until— Essek snorts quietly. “Caleb Widogast,” he chides softly, “is this a love story about wizards?”

At first, he doesn’t answer and Essek briefly considers the option of Caleb wilfully ignoring him. Then, there’s a barely audible snore. When he glances down in surprise, the human is leaning against his shoulder, soundly asleep. He noisily chews on a strand of his hair, a bit of drool dripping onto Essek’s shoulder.

For a moment he can’t help but stare, a dopey smile on his face. He quickly arrives at the conclusion that something as disgusting as that has absolutely no business being as endearing as it is. But for some reason he doesn’t mind at all.

Moving carefully and slowly, in order not to disturb Caleb’s sleep, he puts down The Creation of Silver. It is getting rather late and he probably should begin his trance, if he wants to wake before Caleb's inevitable departure.

He leans back, wiggling a bit to find a comfortable position. He thinks he's doing a good job of not rousing Caleb until the human grunts quietly. Essek freezes, fearing he may have woken him, but instead of opening his eyes, Caleb just shifts closer to him, throwing an arm and a leg across his lap to hold him tight.

Essek looks down at his... friend with a fond expression. After a moment of consideration, he reaches down to brush the strand of hair behind his ear.  

Sometimes, he feels like he can barely contain all the love he feels for this man within himself. One day, perhaps, he might even find the courage to tell him so.

Zemnian Translations:

Hausschuhe - slippers. In fact a Very Important German thing. Can't wear your normal shoes indoors, so you need special house shoes. Schlaf gut, Herr Thelyss. - Sleep well, Mister Thelyss. Gute Nacht, mein Schatz. -  Good night, my darling. (lit. treasure) Schlaf wohl und g'sund, bis morgen früh's Kaffeele kommt. - Sleep well and sound until tomorrow morning the little coffee arrives. (My Caleb is Suebian now and I don't take criticism. I was writing this when I suddenly remembered this sentence my parents used to say to me and I thought if my sleep deprived brain remembers things like that, it would only be appropriate if Caleb's did too.)

[classic80sand90smovieloves2]

Meeting and Dating Spike

(Not my gif)(Requested by anonymous)

(There are so many options for meeting Spike that it was genuinely hard to choose which one I wanted to write for this. I could do probably do a whole post about various meeting scenarios)

- Spike knew about you far before the two of you met. He’d been watching, or more accurately stalking you, ever since he saw you with the Blonde slayer. 

- Initially, it’s to use you as a weapon; to taunt the slayer with the threat of hurting her weak little mortal friend. It makes his fun little game of getting under her skin so much easier. All he has to do is show up near you, linger just out of your view or look as though he’s about to approach you and her face crumbles into a look of both severe warning and fear. 

- But he never does confront you, not until you’re forced to find out that Buffy is a slayer and that vampires are real and that your life is very much so in danger if you don’t start taking some precautions. 

- So you stopped walking at night, or going anywhere at night, even with friends. Stopped hanging out in shady places, always carried holy water or a cross, etc. You were doing well, you were being safe, until one night when you went out with some friends; after a few quiet and safe months for everyone, and without thinking, you did so with no “weapon”. 

- At first, you had a surge of fear course through you upon finding that you forgot your safety precautions at home, but as the night dragged on and nothing happened, you were able to calm down. You had fun, your life was back to normal at least for a little while, and soon enough your friends were dropping you off back at home. 

- You waved to them as they drove off, brushing away your hair as the wind blew it in your face. You turned to head inside your house, only getting a few steps forward before a hand gripped your shoulder and pulled you backwards. 

- If there was ever a time to die of fright, now would be it. Of course, standing before you was the bleach blonde bat himself. 

- He was far more handsome than you ever expected from Buffy’s warnings but that was besides the point. He flashed a grin at you, moving forwards as you clumsily walked backwards to get away from him. 

“Hasn’t anybody ever warned you about being out alone at night, pet?” 

- You couldn’t have answered if you tried though it turned out you didn’t have to. The sound of a car approaching broke the silence and in an instant Buffy was jumping out of the passenger side seat and running towards the two of you. 

- Spike merely held his hands up in a mocking gesture of surrender as the blond threatened him, his eyes locking darkly on you for a lingering moment before he stalked off. Buffy guided you to your door and made you promise to be careful, handing you the jacket you’d forgotten at the party. 

- That was the last time you saw him for a long time though you’d heard of his temporary alliance with Buffy when trying to stop Angelus and Acathla from sucking the world into hell. Buffy assured you that he’d left town with Drusilla and wasn’t coming back, putting your mind at ease. Well, at ease until he did come back. 

- Heartbroken, depressed, and alone Spike returned to Sunnydale, and who did he visit? Well, who else but you! 

- You were sitting on your back porch when he arrived, completely alone with everyone in your house out for the night. Turns out that fight or flight wasn’t the only response one could have when encountering something dangerous; there was also freeze. 

“Spike,” you could barely get the name out, eyes wide, heart racing nervously. “What are you doing here?”

- He gazed at you for a long moment, his jaw set moodily and his eyes contemplating and stormy. And then, as though it were normal, he took a seat beside you on your porch and began to speak. 

- He started from the beginning, talking about helping Buffy, leaving town with a girl, their relationship. And then he began to speak about their fight and subsequent breakup, and in pure shock you realized that the man had started to cry. 

- Now unbeknownst to you and as I said before, Spike had watched you for a long time. He’d seen the way you were with your friends and how kind you were and him, desperate for someone to talk to, had decided that he would unleash his tale of misery upon you. 

- Okay, so you’d comforted your friends during breakups before but comforting a depressed vampire after a breakup; one that only months prior was undoubtedly going to kill you, was not something you were prepared for. 

- Tentatively, you reached out and placed your hand on his shoulder, stilling there for a moment, trying to think of what you should do. Before you could speak, he’d leaned down and pressed his face against your shoulder, branching off into more of his story. 

- You took his cold hand into your free one and began to speak, hesitantly offering comforting words and explanations, reasoning with him that maybe this girl wasn’t meant for him as much as it would hurt for him to admit it. 

- After a few minutes of this, he raised his head from your shoulder, sniffling and wiping his face before setting his gaze forward and awkwardly excusing himself. You; still bemused by the entire encounter, said goodbye and without thinking told him that you’d “be here”. 

- He froze for a moment before nodding and slinking off into the darkness. You merely took a deep breath and went back inside your house, wondering what the hell your life had become. 

- As time would tell, your caring nature would prove to be a driving force in the creation of a friendship between you and the vamp. You showed him (1) one ounce of kindness and he latched onto it, feeding from it like the vampire he is. 

- He’d taken your advice to heart, kept himself from Drusilla and settled into his cozy crypt in Sunnydale, though that wasn’t the only place he resided. Spike had also taken to loitering around you and your house. 

- No one has ever really been nice to Spike which is awful to think about but true nonetheless. It hadn’t really bothered him before since he’d never had anything to compare his treatment to, but now that you’d shown him genuine care and kindness, well, he wanted more. 

- So yes, he loiters, he visits, he acts as though his sudden trailing of you is not odd in the slightest. You don’t have the heart to turn him away, not after that emotional display of his, so you just accept it although wearily at first. 

- After a while, you begin to trust him. If this was all a ploy then hell, his dedication was enough to warrant his right to kill you. But it wasn’t a ploy, as much as Buffy believed it was when she found out, scolding you for being stupid and demanding that Spike stay the hell away from you. He didn't. 

- He makes every excuse in the book to come and see you, showing up uninvited yet unsurprisingly nearly every night and sometimes day. It doesn’t even really matter what you’re doing at the time, he has no problem just sitting and watching, helping, or doing something on his own. 

- It takes some time to realize why he’s so drawn to you and when he does, he doesn’t know what to do because it’s finally so obvious to him. And it scares him.

- Above all, he fears rejection because the more time he spends with you, the more he realizes that you not returning his affections is going to tear him apart. So he puts off telling you though not for long, he can only keep himself from confessing for so long before he finally can’t take it anymore.

- He calls you from a payphone one night and asks if you can come see him, “just for a little while” though you know it won’t be, knowing him. You glance at the clock and though it’s late and you should probably be going to bed, you agree.

- Soon enough, you’re walking into his humble abode and questioning him as to what he wanted you over for, missing the way his eyes locked adoringly onto you as you shrugged your jacket off. He remains quiet for a minute until you call his name curiously.

- Finally, he confesses everything. How you’re the only one who’s ever really been nice to him. How he thinks you’re beautiful. How he loves your personality. And finally, how he loves you. You’re shocked to say the least but you don’t have time to be shocked, he’s looking at you expectantly; vulnerably, waiting for an answer and hopefully one that won’t shatter whats left of his heart.

“I-I don’t know what to say.” You stutter out, swallowing the lump of emotion that’s made it’s home in your throat.

“Just say that you love me back.” He whispers.

- He’s pleading with you now and the mere thought of how truly in love with you he must be to discard his usual sarcasm and defensiveness and genuinely beg you to not reject him pushes you to respond.

“I love you too.” You can see the weight lift from his shoulders as he moves closer to you.

“Say it again...please.” He asks quietly and your heart races.

“I love you.” You reply as he reaches you, mere inches away from your own body. He pulls you into him, his arms wrapping around you tightly, pinning you to him.

“One more time. ...Just please, one more time.” He whispers into the crook of your neck.

“I love you. I love you. I love-”

- Your words are cut off by a desperate kiss. Months of yearning and longing piled up into one amazing, beautiful kiss.

- You always thought that a kiss making you weak in the knees was something reserved only for movies but it was then that you found out that wasn’t the case. By the time you were forced to pull away because of a little thing called the need to breathe, he was the only thing holding you up.

“I love you.” You told him earnestly, gazing into his eyes, your hand smoothing the back of his hair. He silently tilted his face up, pressing his lips to your forehead before pressing it against his own.

“Stay with me?” He asked and you recognized that it meant two things all at once.

- He keeps himself glued to you at all times. You’re that insufferable couple who can never keep their hands; or lips, off of each other, he can’t at least.  

- He likes playing with your hair. Doesn’t matter what’s going on, whether you’re perfectly happy, horny or arguing; his hand gravitates to your hair without thinking.

- Painting his nails.

- Passionate, slightly rough kisses. He ravages your mouth whenever he can.

- Making out, like, a lot. Doesn’t matter what mood either of you are in, all he wants to do is shut out the world and focus on your lips and the way he can get you to make those quiet little moans.

- Sitting on his lap. Be careful though, he gets particularly handsy and needy whenever you do. 

- He’s pretty much horny all the time and when he isn’t right off the bat, he’s very easy to turn on.

- Teasing him with your neck; it drives him crazy. If you let him feed off of you, I assure you, it will be the most erotic thing you’ve ever been through.

- He compliments you a lot, especially when you get all dressed up, but he’ll also sometimes just bite his lip at you, looking you up and down and making you seriously contemplate not going out like you were planning. 

- He calls you sooo many pet names. Things like: baby, darling, love, sweetheart, pet. Not to mention the one’s he’s made into pet names with how much he calls you it. 

- Calling him William; it always seems to do something to him whenever you do. He can’t really describe what he’s feeling but he isn’t going to tell you to stop.

- Getting “bloody awful” poetry written about you. You don’t even care if it’s bad, you find it adorable and romantic either way, though you’ll probably only get to read it if you go snooping.

- Chivalry is ingrained deep within him and it always comes out when he’s with you. He opens doors, pulls out your chair, etc, without even thinking about it.

- Getting to wear the jacket™. He’ll give you hell for not bringing your own coat but will do so while draping his own over you and pulling you close.

- Singing along to the radio with him. He likes classic rock so that’s usually what’s playing.

- Soft, lingering touches. 

- He acts as though he’s touch starved even though he’s obviously had affection people before; namely Drusilla. He gets all weak when you put your hands on him or show him affection. Either that or he just gets all riled up.

- As much as he loves your kindness, he does like when you’re aggressive and mean to him. There’s just something about an angry woman that drives him wild.

- He has a bad habit of talking when he shouldn’t and/or being aggressively; and unhelpfully, sarcastic. Get used to telling him to or making him shut up, your choice.

- Innuendoes, sarcasm and delightful quips.

- Late night visits. If you can, I’d suggest adopting a nocturnal sleeping pattern. 

- But don’t worry, or, well, maybe you should, because he’ll also visit you during the day, wrapped in a blanket and quite literally smoking. He’ll greet you as though it’s completely normal, defensively asking if it’s a crime to want to see “his girl” when you incredulously ask him what he’s doing. 

- Does he accidentally stay at your place until after the sunrises so that he’s “forced” to stay with you the entire day? Maybe....

- He’s clingy and possessive in an endearing, slightly annoying way. He only does it or acts like it because he loves you so much so you can’t really be too bothered by it.

- He likes to think of himself as a big bad vampire but deep down he’s a sentimental, emotional softie who’s desperate for love.

- Comforting him. He deserves to have someone be there for him and believe in him and you’re that person. You’re the only one who really gets to see that broken side of him and you should be honored by that privilege.

- He’s not very experienced in comforting people but he has this inexplicable urge to do so whenever he see’s that you’re upset. Even if he’s furious with you, the moment he see’s tears, it’s like the anger drains out of him and leaves him with a heart that’s aching at the sight of you so hurt.

- He insists on looking after you when you’ve fallen ill or gotten hurt. He trusts no one else to do it, not letting them near you unless he’s sure that they can help in a way he can’t. You’re practically held prisoner until you’re well again, though he makes your imprisonment quite enjoyable.

- He holds you while you sleep, watching over you, memorizing every detail of your face. Usually, you’re either cradled against him, your face resting against his arm and your arms wrapped around his waist, or he’s spooning you from behind and pressing kisses to whatever bare skin he can reach.

- He makes these confessions that have your heart racing and tears wanting to come to your eyes because of how beautifully romantic and touching they are. They can be about anything having to do with you: your beauty, your personality, the things you do, or just how he feels about you in general.

- He’s genuinely scared of how hard he’s fallen in love with you. He’s never really been close to anyone; not like he is with you at least, so it frightens him to see how much of an affect you have on him.

- It may sound odd but he loves your scent. It’s practically a drug to him. He huffs you and your belongings: your neck, your hair, perfume, clothing.

- He steals your clothes and photos. He’s practically got a shrine to you in his crypt, nestled deep in one of his drawers where he hopes you’ll never find it since he doesn’t want to explain what its doing there. 

- He kinda, sorta, moves into your house after you start dating. I mean, he’s there so much that he’s practically living with you. He definitely stole one of your drawers over time, sneaking his stuff into it right under your nose until you finally realize that you have an entire drawer full of just his clothes.

- You aren’t really sure how he did it, but he made your mother really like him, like even before the two of you started dating. And rest assured, if you got a boyfriend between becoming friends and dating him, Spike most definitely turned your mother against them. Either that or she just liked him so much more and tried to persuade you to date the vamp instead, which he’d be very smug about.

- Buffy isn’t fond of your relationship but she plays nice, except for when she gave him the “I’ll stake you if you hurt her” speech.

- Defending him. He gets so happy and smug whenever you do, a Cheshire grin spreading across his mouth as he stands behind you.

- He wants to be better, for you above all else, and with you by his side, he’s sure he can.

- He get’s incredibly jealous over you. He doesn’t even like hearing your exes name leave your mouth, god forbid someone were to flirt with or be interested in you. The police would find their body dead in a ditch somewhere or; at the very least, severely beaten. 

- He’s incredibly protective and selfless when it comes to you. He’s ready to kill and be killed if it means that you’ll be safe. Thankfully, not many of your threats are that big so he doesn’t have to put his undead life on the line.

- Taking care of him when he’s hurt. He only allows you to do it, not wanting to be that vulnerable looking under anyone else’s gaze. He has a habit of saying that he “doesn’t deserve you” once you finish doing something for him which make you feel the need to prove that he does.

- You get into little meaningless arguments and bicker a lot but you don’t have very many serious fights. But if you did have a serious fight, he’d raise his voice, maybe insult you a little; nothing too severe just rude, and one of you would wind up storming off.

- He’d pretend as though he didn’t care but he’d be really torn up, going to your friends to rant about what happened and moping about their homes, not caring if they want him gone or not. They’ll probably wind up calling you to come get him, or he’ll go off in search of you on his own, apologizing for everything and asking if you can forgive him.

- Lots and lots of “I love yous”. They range from being incredibly sincere to horny to lighthearted; sometimes in the same conversation!

- He plans on spending the rest of his undead life with you. He’s already got a ring and a plan to sire you when you’re ready, just say the words and he’ll be yours forever.

[tobiosmilktea]

umpah umpah! smau

↪︎ bokuto x f!reader x iwaizumi

[004] — it’s you!

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a/n: i wrote this during my psych class cause i was bored,, also this wasn’t proofread lol

by the time iwaizumi gets home after long days at work, he would usually knock out like a light after dinner and a bath, but tonight he had more energy than anticipated. and if he was being completely honest, he was not expecting himself to be spending the rest of his night reading a random webtoon. hell, he wasn’t even planning on reading it in the first place, but his boredom got the best of him.

a sigh escapes him as he settles at his desk, finger hovering over the lime green webtoon app for a brief second before giving in. quickly, he input in his information to create an account and before long he was already bombarded with promotions of many other webtoons until he was met with the biggest one—the love cemetery: soon to become a major motion picture!

that’s it, iwaizumi thought as he clicked on the promotional advert as it redirected him to the webtoon’s table of contents. there, he reread the synopsis over again, peering slightly at its contents purely from the plain inkling of familiarity of it all.

the moment he opened the first chapter, he was immediately enticed by the art style and colors. it was as if he was suddenly transported into this world that you have created that the hours had past faster than he had anticipated. the only reason why he even looked up from his phone in the first place was due to that little white box notifying him that his phone was at the cusp dying. iwaizumi’s eyes flickered over to his clock, two in the morning, he read as he let out a sigh. despite wanting to read more of the webtoon, he knew he was going to regret staying up. never mind the fact that he needed to go into work early and even hesitating to close his phone was a good enough reason to force himself to stop.

no wonder bokuto was obsessed.

iwaizumi’s thumb hovered over the author’s handle then, “dddeities?” he whispers to himself before swiftly pressing on the link.

it was then did his familiarity was suddenly confirmed. the moment the link took him to the webtoon author’s twitter account, iwaizumi recognized your name and face within a snap. a lump formed in his throat.

he wasn’t sure what really came over him as the obvious fatigue in his eyes was nowhere to be seen. grabbing his laptop from his desk, his fingers quickly typed away on his keyboard to search up your name on youtube. once the videos loaded in, iwaizumi found himself hesitating again as the first video that was at the top of the list had your smiling face. it still had his heart thumping in his chest even after all these years.

you looked amazing and the fact the interview had just been uploaded a few hours ago had him feeling shy for a brief second. iwaizumi scoffs at himself before shaking his head, “fuck it,” he mutters to himself before clicking on the video. it wasn’t like you, his first love and ex would ever find out he had ever read your webtoon.

“hey, my name is (y/l/n) (y/n) aka dddeities and i’m the author of the webtoon, love cemetery,” your voice softly emitted from iwaizumi’s laptop at a low volume. “today i was invited by webtoon themselves to answer some of your questions you have asked me!”

iwaizumi couldn’t remember the last time he had heard your voice. it was strange hearing it after so long now that you’ve matured since the last time he had seen you—from your looks to the way you dressed, a lot of things changed. granted, you both weren’t fifteen anymore.

“the first question is from seonshines who asked, ‘how does it feel to be able to be part of love cemetery’s film production?’’ you read off the slip of paper before discarding it off to the side, “it’s genuinely a dream come true! i’ve never expected love cemetery to be popular enough to even become a film, but considering how a lot of live actions tend to flop whenever the original creator isn’t part of production, i’m really excited for this project and i have high expectations.”

still as eloquent as usual, iwaizumi thought as he didn’t even notice the smile that was melting upon his expression the more he admired you.

you grab another question from a bowl, “from iloveddd, they asked: how do you plan your webtoons? …well when i first got the idea for love cemetery, i just started plotting it out on a piece of paper. it was initially only me who started drawing, coloring, and publishing each chapter, but once it started picking up a bit, my best friend murakami kaori started co-writing it.”

“kaori?” the familiar name slipped out of iwaizumi’s lips. “i remember her,” how could he forget the girl who got you and him together in the first place?

“overall, she’s mainly the one that keeps the story a bit more interesting while another member of my team, akaashi keiji, is my editor. he’s very meticulous and knows whenever there’s a plot hole somewhere so he’s often part of the writing process as well.” you finished off your answer before continuing to the next one, “this question is from user bokutoxbaisho. they asked ‘did you know that bokuto koutarou of msby black jackals is a big fan of love cemetery?? how do you feel about it??”

hesitance radiated out of you as you awkwardly laughed.

“um...” you trailed out, “i think it’s pretty cool i guess. it’s definitely a shock considering i never thought he would be the kind of guy to be into these types of things.”

iwaizumi’s eyebrows furrowed at this. how would you know? it wasn’t like you were the type to make assumptions about people you didn’t know either. if anything, he found it a bit strange but he shook it off.

“alright the last question is from annaoopsy,” you swiftly changed the subject, “this love triangle trope is honestly one of the best ones i’ve read. it’s really a breath of fresh air for a cliché ,which comes into question, how did you come up with this romance? was it from personal experience in past relationships?”

a chuckle left your lips as you discarded the question with a pink tint appearing lightly on your cheeks.

“let’s just say first loves were a major impact to the creation of this webtoon.”

iwaizumi felt his breath suddenly hitch the moment those words left your mouth. as if a sudden downpour of each and every feeling he felt back then in high school was catching back up to him after years of suppressing them. he swallowed the lump forming in his throat as he slapped his laptop shut, “oh no.”

fun facts! —

kaori was the one who got y/n and iwaizumi together back in middle school after she tricked them into being alone together to get to them to confess

iwaizumi was the one who confessed first since y/n was a shy, art hoe™️ back then lmao

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