#but its important to remember that even if you cant save everyone or stop everyone you have to try

[yes-wejopping]

Something I adore about Ghibli movies, now that Ive seen quite a few, is that they humanize every side of every conflict. Each side has people just doing what they think is best. From the ones I have seen there are no irredeemable bad guys. Even the creatures are not truly monsters. They have thoughts and emotions and things they want to protect.

Its gorgeous and it brings me to tears every time. It is an important reminder that everyone and everything feels things just as deeply as you do.

[chuuya-kisser]

im finally free so that i can fucking scream abt bsd 117 and tell my thoughts on this heartbreaker of a chapter (will def make another post feeding my delusions)

(spoilers utc)

firstly.

ASAGIRI. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUXK ASAGIRI. ASAGIRI WHEN I CATCH YOU ASAGIRI I THOUGHT YOU WERE KILLING-YOUR-CHARACTERS-PHOBIC?????? NOW YOUVE MELTED TWO IMPORTANT CHARACTERS IN TWO CHAPTERS???? WHOS GONNA GO NEXT CHAPTER HUH WHO'S NEXT IN YOUR DEATH NOTE

well

Uh yeah so anyways basically heart broken for multiple reasons so we'll go in order

1- aya. oh my gosh aya. shes what, a ten year old?????? and in the span of a day, she has found out about a vampire lord who is responsible for destroying or saving the whole world, shouldered the responsibility of getting said vampire lord away from the enemy to save the world, developed a father-daughter relationship with said vampire lord, sacrificed herself and got saved by him, believed that the world could be saved now, saw her new father figure's body be torn apart and replaced by a greasy ratass who wants to destroy everything or whatever, with said new father's last words telling her to run to save herself, being saved by said father, then having him dissolve and die again in front of her eyes again. shes a ten year old. what the actual fuck. oh and don't forget, she doesn't know that she lost her other father figure too!

gosh she is going to be SO traumatised and even that is an understatement i really hope she has the strength to recover

2- so akutagawa is back huh? about time, about time (though im not very happy about the cost it took- but atleast he's back?)and he has agreed to protect aya on brams wish? thats surprising honestly, so im wondering if the stuff atsushi told him while fighting him at the airport or whatever affected his subconscious or something so that he consciously wants to start protecting people?

OR maybe! he sees a bit of himself in aya or smth? i mean look i dont exactly remember what happened before he met dazai and was taken in by him okay, dont come at me. but maybe he sees that terrified little kid and something stirs in him or smth anyways go akutagawa go you're her third father figure please dont die again ‼️

(also he looks so good-)

3- and the biggest bombshell

kunikida.

KUNIKIDA‼️‼️ NO NO NO THIS IS NOT ACTUALLY HAPPENING PEOPLE THIS IS NOT I REFUSE TO BELIEVE IT I AM IN DENIAL

just- THINK ABOUT EVERYONE. think about atsushi and tanizaki. who saw him disappear slowly in front of their eyes, to buy them time. think about fukuzawa. who wished for kunikida to be the next president because he was the most ideal. who cares so much, even if he doesnt show it as much. think about aya. she has such a deep bond with kunikida, and now she'll have to face the devastating news that one of the only people who truly believed in her is gone too. think about ranpo and yosano.

think about dazai. who is much too far away to do anything right now, who miscalculated once which led to him being too far to stop fyodors rampage in any way. who was truly doing all this because he wanted to keep the detective agency safe. who, when he realises what will happen next, his first thought is to warn them. who was his new partner, kept him alive, even made him a part of his schedules. who i think he must have to care for, even a little bit.

dazai, who thinks that anything worth wanting is always lost the moment he obtains it. and its happened again. and by the looks of it, it will happen again.

i genuinely want to know how he'll react but i dont want to at the same time. gods i cant fucking do this man

like huhhh asagiri are you tryna make me cry or some shit???? Because youre succeesing SPECTACULARLY

also- are we gonna see tanizaki get liquefied too next chapter? because this panel sure looks like it

im scared for september now like what else are you gonna throw at us, huh asagiri? and what do you mean i have to wait a whole month this is crazy

and i am STILL in denial and will continue to be in denial guys wdym, ofc kunikida is alive and well! hes coparenting aya with bram, having fun at the agency and stuff ‼️‼️ hes perfectly peachy theres no helicopter singularity out for everyone's lives!!! (wow this post is LONG)

[skeletalsepulchre]

so like i know ive joked abt this scene selling the inari is nobimarus mother theory for me before it was confirmed but i think it is a really valuable insight into the two of them and how inari has directly influenced the path of nobimarus development

we were confirmed from this latest chapter that what inari hates most is betrayal. the reason she began moving in such violent ways so quickly once kabane entered the picture is because she saw inugami preventing her from getting the lifestone as a betrayal of their work agreement.

we also know from this latest chapter and arc as a whole is that inari wants to fuse humans and kemono and use the power of the bewitching calculus + evil fox weed to create a society where she acts as "the divine mother" and in her words "stop all conflict between intelligent life because everyone will think the same way". its an interesting contradiction: shes willing to use any amount of force ncessary to exert her will over others, but ultimately it seems like she despises conflict of any sort, even between others. Again, this comes back to my proposition that she and inugami represent two different themes of life: coexistence vs consumption. inari wants the whole to be homologous and absorbed into her

again, though, we hit a contradiction: inari is entirely willing to "forget" the people that fail her. she discard's even her most loyal supporter on a dime, and genuinely cant even recall her name later on. her obsession lays largely in an aversion of being the one scorned, and she's willing to discard reason entirely to satisfy her upset (see above: potentially destroying an entire part of the country and when nobimaru goes hey uh. potentially unwise she says "do you think thats more important than me being mad?")

nobimaru takes on a lot of similar traits to inari, but i think one difference of note is how dutiful nobimaru is. in a weird way, he's one of the more reliable characters in the sense that he's willing to honor the social contract formed with other characters, such as when he asks kabane if he remembers their friendship agreement after konsplosion, and the multiple references he makes (including in the above pages) to the duty of a superior over his employees. even early on, after the loss of his hand, he states that he wouldnt accept ayas healing because the wound "was incurred by his own lack of skill". while duplicitous, he doesnt ever really betray either inugami + co or inari, acting perfectly within the bounds of his orders and not further (even though at multiple points he could have snatched the lifestone), but even when he acts behind inaris back he's ultimately doing it towards a goal that benefits her by preventing the potential consequences of her actions from causing her harm (not inciting the tanukis wrath at yashima, recruiting the marukuma brothers, not destroyign chiiba). and of course, we're told over the course of the story that nobimaru is willing to do almost anything achieve his ends, from destroying his body to working without sleep 24/7, a goal which he calls entirely selfish-- but that end being to save inari. he expresses disgust, rage, and annoyance with inari, and acts behind her back, but ultimately he has never once betrayed her. he's the ultimate dutiful son-- his entire life revolves around her and what he believes is best for her, a mindset which has been cultivated since he was young, with inari asking him to be brave and set up preparations for her plans to be put in action. i wouldnt be surprised if he really has been working alongside her for the decade or so prior to canon, just out of view, because unlike kon (who was young and had her memories tinkered with), he could be trusted to never turn tail on inari. and thats not the only impact inaris rejection of rejection has left on him; it seems he's picked up a similar impulse, with his "type" being "someone who will fall down to him", and his demeanor towards those he allies with frequently being troublesome or just outright annoying. the benign annoyance he uses to prod inugami and umetaro with, however, is very distinct from the malicious compliance he regards others with, and in its own way, seems to act as a test of loyalty and how far he can push it-- especially in umetaros case, when nobimaru is genuinely surprised that umetaro wants to come back to work for him after being freed from his debt, since he had put him through some crazy shit. however, nobimaru doesnt enforce his will in the same aggressive manner she does, presumably because hes aware the entirety of his power comes from a subordinate position to his mother, and his age + status requires much less outright audacity. akagi said nobimaru wanted to control inari, and in a way i think thats true-- he wants to reign her in, but when dealing with the forceful personality and power imbalance of his own mother, he has to toe a more delicate and lowkey line. we saw something similar with younger inari meeting inugami. although again, the fact shes nobimarus mother likely enforces a much harder line of acceptable vs unacceptable behavior when it comes to pushing back.

[marinaiguess]

This is back from December lol. Found it in my drafts so, you can have it. I really don't remember where I was going with this shusugsihs

Ark siblings for yall :')

‐---------------------------------‐--‐

"Are you afraid of anything, Maria?"

"where...where did that come from?"

"I don't know, I was just," he paused for a brief moment, turning his gaze away from her, "thinking about things."

"Shadow, you can talk to me about anything." she smiled reassuringly. "I'll try to help you."

"Yet you're not answering my question."

"how will that help you?"

"I guess you don't want to answer then."

She stops and sighs, her eyes drawn back to Earth before she looks at him again. "I'm sorry, shadow, I was just... not expecting that kind of question." Her face falls as she sits down, admiring her favorite view.

Shadow is concerned but not exactly sure what to do. So, he resorts for a simple hand on her shoulder, it should be enough. "I apologize, Maria, you don't have to answer if you don't -"

"it's funny actually. you were made to protect me from the inevitable."

"Maria?"

She is a human, sure, so she always has had responsibilities. But she is more than that, something more important. She is a big sister. she won't crumble down in front of her brother. she shouldn't be afraid of anything, she can't be. she shouldn't admit to anyone what she is afraid of. but why is she so tempted then?

maybe because it doesn't matter. because they won't be able to change her destiny no matter how hard her grandfather tries. Love prevails, but it can't change fate, it cant create miracles, it won't give her a second chance on this life. she turns to shadow, heart instantly filled with warmth just from looking at his eyes. maybe, whatever she'd do, that crippling fear will always find its way to her. And no one can save her.

"I'm afraid of dying shadow."

He whips his head around to look back at her, confusion prevalent in his features. If he is taken aback, he manages to hide it. "But, isn't death part of life for everyone?"

"for people like me, it is. for you, not really."

shadow remains silent, allowing her to speak further.

"still, it's not just death that I'm scared of, I know I can't avoid that. it's...I want to be able to do things. to make my dreams come true. to find and fulfill my purpose. to go down there, on that planet..." her voice cracks slightly, and Shadow realizes it's the first time he feels like he has a heart, he didn't know he had to feel it break in order to understand that it is there. "that planet which" she reiterated after a very short pause, an important one in order to pull herself together, "is so close yet feels so far out of reach for me, and help people in need with you by my side. I want to live life. and I'm afraid death will deprive me of this before I get the chance to." Not even once had she glanced away from earth, visualizing in her head what life would be like on there, how people lived their everyday lives to the fullest.

The tears pricking her eyes are burning more than they usually do.

[posebean]

letting it leave mutual circles heres my rinky fic idea enjoy

niki gets into an accident (because of rinne) saving him or smth like getting hit by a car and so then nikis seriously injured and wakes up in a hospital covered in bandages and his arm in a sling but no memories at all not even his own name rinnes there when he wakes up and is breaking down into tears and then nikis just like. im sorry but. who are you? and rinne just stares and is like niki are uou joking

niki: niki? is that my name

rinne:

and then rinne leaves the room and niki is so confused because 1. he has no idea who he is and why he was in a hospital all beaten up and 2. he had no idea who that red haired man was and then out of exhaustion and painkillers he passes out

the next time he wakes up himeru and kohaku are there n help him out . explain to him a bit about who he is, take him out of the hospital. red haired man from earlier is nowhere to be found niki feels like he dreamed that whole scene. himeru and kohaku dont mention rinne at all idk why because if rinne wanted something stupid they wouldnt but well. gotta advance stupidity somehow i guess

its a whole thing of niki finding this red haired man trying to befriend him but rinne just acts like theyre strangers out of pure guilt and horror because the love of his life was literally on his deathbed because of him (he wasnt rinnes just being a dramatic bitch)

but theres still the fact that niki got hurt because of him and now has no memories except for standard motorskills and etc and a little innate stuff for cooking but like. no memories memories. no relationships or feelings.

and everyone at es is careful around niki because he doesnt remember and hes probe to migraines as if hes trying to remember but just cant and also for some reason he feels like a part of him is missing and he gravitates toward that red haired man he thought he hallucinated after running into rinne in the halls on coincidence one day and rinne just. tries so hard to push him away and it explodes into a whole rinne-kun why are you pushing me away i just wanna get to know you the way you act its like we knew each other before i lost all my memories

and rinnes like you dont want to know me and its better this way you really wont like scum like me and nikis like bro what are you talking about first ur saying were strangers now ur saying we do know each other and have for this whole time and rinne is like

you were my star but i put you out with my own hand lets leave it at that and then runs away and now niki has even more wuestions unanswered than answers and its a whole game where niki slowly pieces together from things scattered around his apartment, vague memories of someone else's life, something with Rinne and hes like oh and idk the chase continues until he finally corners rinne and is like rinne-kun i might not be the same anymore i might not have any memories of you at all but now i know is that the me in the past was the most dearest to you and i know you feel like you are the reason hes gone and feel the need to punish yourself but i dont think hed want that he pushed you out of the way of that car for a reason i may not be the same, i may not have the memories that we used to share. but i know that deep down i still have that love for rinne-kun. id like to get to know rinne-kun again. that sweet brute of a man that the past me loved so much. i want to relearn every memory ive forgotten, every memory that is important to rinne-kun. maybe one day ill messure up to the past me again , maybe ill be whole again, rinne-kun, will you help me remember and then rinne fucking bawls because he hasnt cried at all in front of niki during this and was only in complete shock or cold apathy (while himeru and kohaku watch him sob in private and are like. u fucking idiot stop doing this n hes like no i ruined niki he'll be betyer off without me )and cue tender moment where hes like niki doesnt have to get any memories back i will love him no matter what, no matter the cost even if the world burns and we all change that will always stay true. and nikis like but i wanna rember if these memories are so important to rinne/kun they must be important to me too i dont know if ill ever get all my memories back but i at least want to know the memories that rinne kun loves so in case rinne-kun loses his memory i can be the one to remind him of the memories he holds so dear

[sw33t-oubliette]

can you tell me more abt henr y emily 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

RUBS HANDS TOGETHER NEFARIOUSLY ok sooo basicallyyyy :3

henry co-founded fazbears with william and helped make the original animatronics . he had a daughter [charlotte "charlie" emily] that was killed by william after being locked outside of fredbear's diner , seen in take cake to the children [fnaf 2 minigame] and security puppet's minigame [fnaf 6] . The puppet [an animatronic] found his daughter outside after she was killed and layed down next to her , deactivating in the process because it was raining , letting her possess it .

hes theorized to be the desk man from fnaf world , a secret character that says alot of things but the only rly important stuff is from the circus baby ending . Image of the desk guy bellow

in the circus baby ending , he talks about how hes made something terrible and he cant stop it . and then the lights go out , circus baby[the animatronic that killed elizabeth afton , williams daughter]'s voice says "the show will begin momentarily . everyone please stay in your seats" and when the lights come back on henrys head is on his desk and blood pools around his head . Me personally i think the desk man is him but its . Kinda weird with the ending because he dies in pizzeria sim . But i like thinking that so im ignoring how much that doesnt make sense

In pizzeria simulator , hes the cassette man that tells michael stuff throughout the game . tbh i havent payed that much attention to pizzaria sim but im insane abt the completion ending so im talking abt that

in the completion ending , scrap baby [circus baby but all fucked up] , scraptrap [that one ugly ass springtrap redesign] , and michael afton are all inside the building . henry sets the building on fire and starts talking over a cassette . His monologue is split up into parts directed towards different people in the building .

Elizabeth/scrap baby/everyone: he apologizes for interupting elizabeth ["if you still even remember that name"] , and says they havent been called here for what they think , and theyre in a "labyrinth with no exit , a maze with no prize" . "always chasing the cries of children in some unseen chamber , always seeming so near yet always out of reach . but you will never find them . None of you will ." chat im normal

michael: he tells michael there was a way out , but he thinks thats not what he wants and hes exactly where he wants to be . henry says hes remaining nearby and the place wont be remembered , itll fade away like every tradgedy should .

everyone: he says theres peace waiting for most of them , but for one of them [william/scraptrap] the deepest pit of hell has opened waiting to swallow him whole ."so dont keep the devil waiting , old friend" old friend a gayass thing to call someone 🤣

charlie [his daughter]: he says he knew she wouldnt be content to die and its in her nature to protect the innocent , he apologizes for nobody being out there to save her and "i couldnt save you then , do let me save you now" .

he ends it with "this ends. For you and for all of us" and the tape ends . they all die in the fire together and its implied henry died in it too ? man all we know is how he died was a suicide of some sort . normal about the afton's fire motifs aaaaannddddd hit post

[gemwolfz]

good morning chat (<- it's 12:30 pm) its time for a GEM FROG WATCHPOST (instead of putting it in the bg while i draw because ive accepted i cant draw and read at the same time)

btw my very legal straming site doesnt have episode descriptions and no way im remembering an episode thats been mentioned by number so i have no idea what im getting into. also im setting a timer to truly see how long my autistic ass can stretch a 15 minute episode. ok lets get started :)

okay first of all intro i havent seen yet lets GOOOO. PURURU SIGHTING IN THERE HEY GIRL!! i actually need to watch some eps with pururu in em btw. like hey show her to me. anyway good intro lots of guys spotted :)

^ CATEGORY 5 DORORO EVENT HI. experiencing the horrors as usual i see

i see so this is what we're doing today huh. do you intend to rip my heart out.

im sorry they have a fucking invasion planning chore wheel? thats really funny

OH IT'S THIS ONE HUH. THIS IS WHAT WE'RE DOING HUH (lovingly)

wcdonalds btw. sorry sorry wcdonalds cracks me up every time in any show

^^ his ass did NOT process what was just said!!!

he had it right the first several times cmon man.

hes taking this in stride huh. even in category 5 THE LORE situations the silly grind doesnt stop

why is zeroro resonance so fucking stupid btw. sorry man.

screenshot that speaks for itself man

somehow i dont think "my alien ninja partner is in serious trouble i need to leave immediately" will be counted as an excused absence by your teachers but after scaling a building in a single leap i dont think anybodys gonna question you. i love you koyuki

[this image set broke in the editor but it included keroro and tamama calling zeroro SO MEAN for not explaining his plan to them] frankly i respect keroros unwillingness to treat situations with the proper gravity because i do the same thing king

his ass does not care

he changed his mind something is terribly wrong

okay lets be real here the platoon would NOT have found him there. if he hadn't been able to contact koyuki he'd have been fucked. badly. something something being saved again by the person who showed you the warmth and beauty the planet has to offer

literally yeah the fate of the planet is held by natsumi being able to throw frogs like splat balls. pov youre giroro and the number one person standing between you guys and invasion is decidedly the girl who is constantly personally stopping you from blowing shit up. this is a personal attack

important and relevant but also im sorry "brat" is incredibly funny word choice coming from tamama

no reaction i can put into words. btw this episode is labelled as a filler episode. just so you know. i just think thats funny. haha so silly

aye.......................................... i would be using more reaction images but i have to prioritize screenshots. anyway god.

they were holding their fucking BREATH. his ass could have died!! badly!!! their deep sigh of relief is not as visible as i'd have hoped but you know. you feel me.

there are reactions i am making that are sound effects i cannot put into words sorry. im better at posting silly nonsense im sure you understand. hell, post horse staring at the ocean MAN again

he goes "i'm sorry about that, everyone!" as if it was fucking nothing. DUDE. This is why you caught that trauma-eating brain parasite because you just act like shit was NOTHING DUDE...

........yea...........................

NO EYECATCH OR ANYTHING? YOURE JUST GONNA TAKE US TO THE NEXT EPISODE? OKAY. OKAY THATS FINE. THAT'S FINE.

gem conclusion:

anyway i spent an hour watching this ten minute episode. sorry for maybe a weak reaction post i need to stir this episode in my head like a soup. thank you plates for your recommendation. join me in the rbs later as i may watch episode B and experience whatever tonal whiplash this episode came with

[jellyaibo]

awesum splendid dream!!! (im lying)

so in this dream cheesy decided to randomly release a post finale thing for hfjone, that seemingly had the main 3 (bryce, amelia, and liam) and even airy having a good ending. it starts off with liam, amelia, and bryce going to some bridge above a river, there was also a tunnel on the bridge too (this is important remember this), and they were chatting about a fourth person coming to take a photo with them, which then reveals that airy was going to join them.

liam turns around and sees airy waiting to cross a road, liam and bryce decide to help him cross since to them it looks like he had no fucking clue where he actually was, so they waited for the cars to stop and helped airy cross, both of them held his hands like he was a fucking child and they kept joking and talking about how he can barely function, with airy not really even paying attention to what the two are saying. then, as the two approach amelia who was still standing at the bridge, bryce decides that just carriying airy would work much better, so he cradles him basically like a child. help!

anyways everyone gets ready to take the picture and once its taken they realize that airy wasnt looking at the camera so they make fun of him and decide to take another picture, while they are getting set up again airy somehow gets his hands on a match and somehow nobody fucking notices him lighting it and putting it out for funsies because they are too busy making fun of him because he called the camera a "flash box thing." so the smoke from the match starts wafting into the tunnel, and makes contact with a faulty lightbulb that was hanging inside of the tunnel, which caused the match to ignite again suddenly, and set bryce on fire since he was still holding airy.

obviously this made him drop airy and he was desperately trying to pat the flames off him, liam and amelia were also rushing to put out the flames and while this was happening bryce was just fucking screaming his lungs out, then i think amelia manages to get a bucket of water from the river below and puts out the flames but i think it was way too late cuz the flames fucking melted bryces face off (and i mean this literally, when she threw the water onto him his face fucking came off, it wasnt gruesome at all because there wasnt really any gore except for his eyes since they seemed to be gone after this??? idk its weird to describe) oh and he also slipped on the water and fell into the river, which now seemed to be RUSHING with so much water compared to how calm it was in the beginning, so bryce got quickly swept away, you could still hear him screaming for a minute but then he went quiet and got swept away. liam dived into the river after him but then he was just- never seen again after this, i think he immediately fucking died, or maybe something else happened but i cant remember for the life of me. anyways amelia is scrambling to find a way to save the two, she tries calling for help and looking around for airy but he also seems to be gone, but then the camera cuts to under the river where airy plunged into the water himself for . some reason and is thinking really hard about things, but then he remembers that he needs to breathe so he frantically swims up to the surface and nobody is there anymore, just him and the tunnel bridge. theres some music playing here i think, and we just have a shot of airy getting out of the river and walking onto shore (the river is completely calm again btw) and then it just fucking ends there??????? theres . a lot of credits and even a little fucking "thanks for watching" from cheesy, and i tried skipping to the end of it which revealed a fucking after credits scene where amelia is in a PSYCH WARD . but for some reason there was some creepypasta shit going on here cuz when i tried to go back to the psych ward part it just didnt exist anymore, and instead was replaced by a very….interesting montage.

so it showed two furry wolf characters, one of them wore a green hoodie and the other wore a red suit, the green hoodie wolf was trying to mug the suit wolf. then it cut to two children in kindergarden, one (obviously) had a green backpack and the other had a red lunchbox, then the red lunchbox kid tried to either play with or…bully the green backpack kid, i cant remember but- basically this was cheesy saying "oh yeah bro the lore is deep" and these two have been destined to meet in every "past life." and they were also destined to die together in some way, i think it then showed how the wolves and children die which was upsetting and this went on for a bit longer with other "sodapack colored" characters until the video just suddenly ended. and uh yeah, it was 5 am when i started writing this and uhmmm i cant go back to sleep cuz of it

oh and also heres my recreation of their last photo

(ofc it was much more close up but i wanted to show how the bridge looked too, also its messy cuz its. fucking 6 am now helpme)

[camelspit]

roisin. roisin please elaborate on bramblestar’s corpse

hiii!

so, i never did finish that arc (I read 3 or 4 books of it and then stopped caring about the releases) and it's been a few years so! might be missing a bit of important info but!

you remember ashfur? squirrelflights ex that tried to kill her children before they were revealed to be leafpools?

ashfur dies (murdered by hollyleaf) and goes to star clan (questionable considering other cats have gone to the dark forest for far lesser crimes and also? squirrelflight and leafpool almost got sent to the dark forest in a shitty trial and done much less than he has?)

bramblestar gets sick (possibly caused by ashfur somehow?)

while losing one of his lives due to the sickness, ashfur somehow possesses him. the mechanics of this were probably explained better later, but I don't know them.

no one knows it's ashfur

he basically starts like. really going down hard with the warrior code, punishing cats for like. nothing. and he ends up banishing like 3/4s of the clan at least.

(this includes squirrelflight and jayfeather and pretty much everyone importanr I think. btw)

he also encourages everyone else to do the same, which ends up really resonating with riverclan.

mistystar kicks out a few cats, including mothwing because she doesn't believe in starclan (even though mothwing has been there for her and saved lives. how many times now? lmao)

anyway all the cats banished sort of form their own group

squirrelflight comes up with a plan like "ok he (still thinking its bramblestar) will regret this if he sees that I'm injured. i'll blame it on a dog or something and come crawling back so I can spy on them or something. mothwing, beat me up" (mothwing does not beat her up bc she says her job is to heal. jayfeather, however, happily volunteers for the role lmao.)

the plan works i think lmao

while this is happening, bramblestars spirit is just kind of. floating around being like wtf.

anyway he finds rootpaw (one of the three main characters of the arc) an apprentice in skyclan

he can see ghosts or whatever because his dad is tree, a former loner who was part of the sisters until they kicked him out for being male. he can also see ghosts (i cant remember if he can also see bramblestar)

that! is about as far as my knowledge goes. i don't actually know how they solve any of this bc i didn't get that far. i do know, however, that everyone knows he's actually ashfur at this point bc squirrelflight realized it and blurted it out at a gathering.

(that was a cliffhanger though so. who knows if they actually believe her lmao)

[pinkseas]

naur but everytime i word vomit into ur inbox i literally cant remember 70% of it than the core details and the ones you answered the next day so it's kinna funny i wish tumblr lets me save my anon asks than eating it up cus i ain't drafting it like ANYWAY TO UR BESTIE THAT MENTIONED US >> I LOVE GOING INSANE WITH ALY PINKSEAS TOO ur friends are so real!!!!!!! youre insane are you single IS SUCH A FUNNY ASS LINE I WISH I WAS HIT BY IT AND I'D SAY YEA WHAT ABOUT IT

"twitter scares me so bad" as you should it's a shithole for genshin altogether with discourse and mischaracterization and you'd literally cannot stop seeing any of them once you get genshin in ur algorithm and yknow what i realized my only Best fandom experience came from tumblr with undertale Despite its discourses bc its got effective filters and the people are genuinely Good so now i'm thinking of yeeting outta twt and spectating my way here like last time (i am already doing it)

"if i read soulmates it has to be done Right [...] they can’t depend on one another they cant need one another they have to Want. they have to Choose" LIKE NO YEAH THIS IS SO TRUE SO REAL THIS IS WHAT BUGS ME ON SOULMATE AUS when it's almost not by choice and they have to work on accepting it like they're forced into needing it's like,.. a very complicated method here in changing their minds toward the other person Because of the cursed bestowed on them- the point of Choice is so fucking important to me especially when it comes to xiao specifically bc in my rendition of his he's unfamiliar with such things for a long time,.. and even in canon he's a lil troubled about deciding things for himself in the presence of higher beings until he's allowed to IT JUST HURTS HE LOST HIS FREE WILL AND THEN UR SOUL BOUND LIKE WHAT (AND FR specific soulmate tropes where the two ARE given the choice for it are. acceptable 2 me)

"lumine handling intensity well and being much better at identifying her emotions suits her SO well imo" yeah like yea!!EVERYTHING ABT THIS and i think it follows up all the traveler's sass in-game bc she's so fuckin hilarious for delivering lines super well despite having Less lines cus aside paimon taking over the talking she does have her moments and i lov her for it I DO WISH THEY HAVE HER TALK MORE EVEN WITH THE USUAL TEXT CHOOSING i just want her sick ass lines conversing

FKSDFHJSKDFJ ENDEARING IS SUCH A GODLIKE WORD TO ME I WILL KEEP USING IT FOR XIAO EVER its the way you can use it like. subtlely. a lil hidden a lil not Much about his cuteness without explicitly calling him cute its Big Word for the small boy!!!!

your thoughts on qpr makes me feel so much better abt thinking this way bout r/s like YEAH its all abt communication and open with boundaries and there really is something stifling about established r/s BUT IT'S COMPLETELY FINE FOR THOSE WHO PREFER THAT ANYHOW!!

AND YES SO MUCH ON LUMINE AND XIAO'S SHOW OF ATTRACTION TO EACH OTHER i wudnt even call it attraction i think anything that indicates a romantic tension between them is something i'm not gonna entertain like 'craving' or 'desire' (this word in particular is used very specific) and stuff like that, and it's a big fact that lumine's attachment feels like its the same to everyone Except aether,... even after she discovers his abyss persona she still begs for them to go back home too. it's unbeatable even to xiao, or at least, xiao has a different treatment to kindness for being so Similar to her (breaks down) "i feel like seeing each other constantly would be a detriment i think it’d make them both feel really weird." like RIGHT????? IT JUST FEELS OFF THIS WAY and it's not a good portrayal of xiao's desperation not wanting to lose someone else anymore. but even then, idt he shows that notion much or at all than his self-sacrifice tendencies, which is an entirely different topic. this thing about xiao's attachments and morals is a complicated thing to tackle altogether...;;,,

"no bc i characterize lumine as LOVING nature so bad" and u are absolute fucking RIGHT to think that, and for me she just likes exploring in general and is a bit of a reckless daredevil so long she has her glider and its the only condition. its stupid it's silly BUT IT MAKES SENSE shes just a constant headache to xiao in looking after her testing through the terrain but /pos

"i am So Grateful to you for sharing your thoughts i am so giddy over us being on such similar wavelengths" AND ME TO YOU TOO IT'S BEEN SO GOOD TO JUST SPILL EVERYTHING I HAVE IN MIND and get comfortable even on stuff im shy to reveal on unpublished asks cus ur reactions even if not agreeing there's still some reassurance anyway and i dont mind that or feel rejected at all when 98% others is what we just. have connected brains on KDJFHSDKJFH AND JEEZ I RLLY DO CAN'T HELP MYSELF WHEN THE BRAINWORMS INVADE WHEN I REPLY UR RESPONSES TOO it takes over my fingers like a parasite i gratefully let em

and ouuouh ur interpretation of the two's development starting in inazuma is so sweet and it makes sense bc of how dangerous the region is bc in my silly lil bran it made sense to have it After the chasm since it's the quests centering his arc AND I STILL CANT BELIEVE HE HAS HIS OWN ARCHON INTERLUDE,.. this made me loving all the peeps of the chasm gang too and i wish they did Something after the quest ended like UEUEUE TRAUMA SHARING SESSION FOR PPL WHO ONLY MET FOR 3 DAYS LETS GO

so like i start from sumeru bc of the points bc of this and bc i love slow development So Much im practically immune to slowburn did u know. all those fics do Not affect me even if i reach its 30th chapter of them being reluctant to opening up. ""zhongli encouraging him to take more time to himself, lumine taking him on little trips guiding him out more and more and more often" is THE CONCEPT EVER YOU HAVE ZHONGLI INVOLVED idk if you dig this but parental zhongli has me on the floor so id like to think he's another important figure in xiao's life aside lumine too he's just that warm hand on his back encouraging Out of his comfort zone and obligations and lumine's the hand that pulls him Along to see the new things of the world. like zhongli is such a dad,.... doing dad things a grandpa to liyue but i also cant help but have him having an attachment to xiao knowing they share a life even as a master-subordinate r/s (cus in my interpretation zhongli never felt that way than thinking he just wants xiao to Live, too,.. sobbing crying shitting)

"taking baby steps in leaving that part of his life, never quite letting go but letting the ties that hold him to liyue loosen, never forgetting his contract and his duty but understanding that there’s no longer an obligation to fulfill it, that he does it out of his own wish instead. i just. idk. idk !!!!!! at the core of it i think im obsessed with them learning how to live again and doing it together" i got no words. i ran out of brain fuel but my body is convulsing folding in on itself liek MY LIEGE YOU ARE!!!!! U R SO,........ LIKE OSBFGKJFGHDKJGH YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA this is THE XIAOLUMI AND METHINKS,....... THE XIAO ARC IN ENTIRETY AS WELL CUS I BELIEVE IN HIS INDEPENDENCY (with a little help and support from ppl who cares bout him) i just akjdhaskejjksfhsdfkjhdsjfhkjdsbvadhvbjhkv

using a read more thingy just for the sake of anyone on mobile

NOT REMEMBERING ASKS IS SO REAL i forget what i say so often even when i Can go back and check how the fuck am i supposed to know what ive said when i Can't

MY BESTIE THAT MENTIONED US >>> SO REAL i think its been more than a few at this point actually which is very funny to me. shan if ur reading this i am holding u so close to me in my little arms. youre insane are you single is the best line ever especially when you are Dating The Person Who Says It my response every time is "no but i could be😏" i find myself far too funny its awful

we are Shaking Hands in terms of being on tumblr experiencing the undertale fandom that's so real of us undertale was the reason i got a tumblr in the first place all those years ago... you should ABSOLUTELY spectate here i literally never see anything i don't want to see i live in my perfect little echo chamber it's so <333

"even in canon he's a lil troubled about deciding things for himself in the presence of higher beings until he's allowed to" GODDD YEAH YEAH YEAH YEA H YEAH YEAHY HEA YEAH !!!!!!!!!!!!! do NOT force this boy into situations he does that enough by himself thank you very much

"even after she discovers his abyss persona she still begs for them to go back home" no bc its just. On Another Level Genuinely. they've been traveling together with no one but each other with god knows how long especially depending on personal headcanons, they're used to going through entire worlds and moving on theyre used to not getting super attached !!! its a little different in teyvat i think because theyve lost most of their power and they're trapped and alone for the foreseeable future but. that still doesnt change the past and their habits yknow ?? its something i try REALLY hard not to think about actually because (with the exception of a very specific au which i am currently writing for) unless they're just. trapped on teyvat Forever i CANNOT imagine lumine staying there once she has the ability to leave and i CANNOT imagine xiao ever leaving. it makes me So Sad genuinely i simply refuse to acknowledge its existence

"xiao's attachments and morals is a complicated thing to tackle altogether" SO REAL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IM SO GLAD U THINK IM RIGHT ABT THE NATURE LOVING it just feels right tbh and "shes just a constant headache to xiao in looking after her testing through the terrain but /pos" also so real <33333333 lumine and her silly little glider. god. i love them both so bad

i do like to think of the chasm as post-inazuma but thats because in my head w/ their development inazuma is like. The Next Step almost, where they're close enough in liyue but the fact that they continue to be close even once lumine has left really hits. and then they've been a bit closer and become familiar with one another in quite a few ways by the time the chasm happens and then i get super self indulgent with the chasm because i am so silly like that <3333 in terms of slowburn and the way you've described their growing closeness it does make SO much sense to swap it tbh i love the thought of the chasm being like the start of things and the way that'd bring them closer before inazuma and. mfgnmhfnmf god. GOD.

"i wish they did Something after the quest ended" no bc in my little brain they get together once every month or two just to have a meal together and talk and keep up with each other they are Friends Now

"parental zhongli has me on the floor so id like to think he's another important figure in xiao's life aside lumine too he's just that warm hand on his back encouraging Out of his comfort zone and obligations and lumine's the hand that pulls him Along to see the new things of the world" this is the most perfect accurate thing i have read in my entire life for starters i LOVE parental zhongli like. idk not FULL parental not too much but def him being a more parental figure in xiao's life especially compared to other interpretations of their dynamic i just. god. it is So Important to me that zhongli cares for him and looks after him just in those little ways. the warm encouraging hand on his back vs the hand pulling him along is PERFECT thats such a fucking amazing way of putting it i love everything abotu that the image is so clear in my head

o(-(

^^^ me dead on the floor thinking about zhongli and lumine being such important figures in xiao's life... i like to think that a Lot of the characters in liyue are important to him in different, small little ways i just don't know their characters well enough to fully describe how but like. idk baizhu qiqi yanfei ganyu yknow ?? i know next to nothing about yanfei but i might have to try and write her for this honestly we'll see how it goes but i REALLY want there to be at least one character other than the few i have now who he ends up talking to even if its just smth rly simple... if nothing else the chasm crew is getting an honorable mention on god

idk i just. xiao has done so much for liyue for so long i really love to think of those very few who know him trying to do little supporting things for him, too it's so important to me

okay and now !!!

i am also gonna answer the Other Ask but without publishing it naturally it will simply live comfy cozy in my inbox <333

THAT ONE SHIP "it mischaracterizes Both characters in the pair altogether for the sake of romance" you're so real for this idk i dont MIND seeing it but it has never felt in character to me and i feel like this describes exactly why ?? idk maybe its just the xiaolumi brainworms eating away at me but like. i Get It

what you said about like. your personal hcs for him in regards to that trauma and how he processes it that is SO fucking valid, i def understand getting anxious about certain self-indulgent hcs im the same way both with the sillier ones and heavier ones but i can promise you that if nothing else i will Never judge you for even the most self indulgent ridiculous shit EVER. like the way you described it all is so valid and so easy to picture and a really good way to interpret/believe he'd deal with everything but even if you were to have the most ooc headcanon or anything ever just for fun just for the sake of it i simply would never judge having fun is the Most Important with these things im so srs

we have diff interpretations of how he'd deal with things like the yaksha's deaths and zhongli dying but i think a lot of the points we both have are still pretty similar, ESPECIALLY with him not knowing how to handle it and ESPECIALLY especially with the shock factor. the way i write him or would write his reaction to that would definitely be him just sort of Shutting Down emotionally because its too much and too overwhelming and so he kicks into like. i cant call it work mode its not really a job. but he fully focuses on fighting and finding out who couldve killed rex lapis and like. he turns his attention to things that are familiar and easier to deal with and he buries himself in them the way one would bury themselves in their work to ignore emotions yknow? and then there'd be the shock factor of "oh he Is alive" and then there's this massive pit of grief with nowhere to go because logically, reasonably, rex lapis is alive, there's nothing left to grieve. he shouldn't still be upset <- man who refuses to let himself process and feel his emotions when the emotions dont stop existing just bc he ignores them

that being said that's definitely a Pattern With Me Specifically like in the barbara fic ive been working its built off of canon but i take it SO far just bc i can :sob: and i enjoy it way too much to want to Not do that yknow? girls who struggle to process and Actually Feel their emotions writing characters strugglign to process and Actually Feel their emotions so that she can process and feel them vicariously through them <3 or something along those lines idk at this point its less that and more "wow this is really fun to write and its smth im familiar with so its easier to write as well"

my cat meowed and i stepped away for like 2 seconds to pet her and immediately lost every train of thought ive ever had in my life hopefully i wasnt gonna say anything else LMAO but no yeah self indulgent hcs and ways of interpreting characters >>>>>>>

i keep reading and rereading the way you described xiao's response to grief i am OBSESSED its so easy to imagine its so easy to see like oh my god. ohhhh my god. based as hell it suits him so well

i cannot think of anythign else to say back to the trenches i go <- finding scenes where i started in the middle or left out the endings and filling those parts in now that i dont know what else to write. its been really nice actually ive gotten a lot done just with that LMAO

[twipsai]

well you have successfully opened the floodgates so! here we go, lets do it to it, time to jam and juice, and whatever else that guy says (also sorry this took so long, i had other things to do that were apparently more important than analyzing that blue hog). this might be a bit messy, i made a bit of an outline of this earlier but these are just my thoughts more-or-less off the cuff.

so, my thesis statement, if you will, is that Sonic isnt really softer or more forgiving or anything in IDW, but hes put in messier situations that bring out that side of him more often.

now, i can go on all day about all the rivals Sonic has befriended over the years and how each of them display how Sonic really does not care when they turn good and just rolls with it, not holding their past against them in the slightest. he doesnt bat an eye when Shadow runs in to defend him and Knuckles from the Biolizard in SA2, he helps Blaze out when the pressure of guarding the Sol Emeralds makes her crack, and fights along side Silver even though he was trying to kill him for the entirety of 06. Sonic doesnt really care about peoples actions in the past, and never has, as long as theyre willing to change and right their wrongs.

and, maybe even more importantly, he wants everyone to have the chance and the freedom to change.

(note: this scene happens after Metal almost floods Planet Freedom with lava)

Sonic struggles with this a lot. on one hand, he absolutely despises how there are some people in the world that will destroy just to destroy, who will hurt just to hurt. but, on the other hand, he also believes that the past is irrelevant to ones present and future, and that anyone (yes, anyone) can change -- for better or for worse

"Sonic reached out to save me before I fell to Earth from the ARK. If I hadn't waved him away, Sonic would've fallen with me. But his determination in trying... I'll never forget that."

he doesnt fight for justice. i feel as though i need to emphasize this. Sonic does not fight for justice. he fights for freedom. he doesnt want to play executioner, he doesnt want to force a persons life into one path, he wants everyone to be able to live life to its fullest, their way, their own way.

"My sorrow at its ruin runs deeper than the depths of the underworld. Do you not understand?" "No! And I don't want to!"

i feel as though i hear the biggest criticisms about IDW during the overpowered arc, when Sonic is desperately trying to help Surge and get her to stop destroying everything around her, including herself.

and, i think it's really telling that in Scrapnik Island, the short story that takes place directly after issue 56 (you know, the one where Sonic gets cooked with 1,000 volts directly to his neck) and realizes he cant help Surge, that nothing he does will fix what Starline has done to her...

...its telling that in that story, he is so sickeningly desperate to help Mecha Sonic.

he wants, with all of his heart, for everyone -- EVERYONE -- to get the chance to grow, to change, to laugh and cry and run and be whoever they want to be. to live. hes more overt about it in IDW simply because hes being put in more complicated situations, situations that challenge this morality (which, i think that it succeeded in this, considering how much discourse there is about Sonic's morality), that make him really have to question if what hes doing is the right thing. we see it with Neo Metal, the Metal Virus, Mr. Tinker, Surge and Kit -- hell, even the Deadly Six directly make him question this!

its not a perfect line of thinking at all, i wont pretend that it is, but hes definitely always been like this. i remember a while back on twitter (dangerous territory, i know), people were saying that Sonic, as seen in IDW, would have tried to "talk it out" with King Arthur in satbk,,, sorta completely ignoring the fact that he helped Merlina, who manipulated him from the very start and tried to take over the world, and even comforted her at the very end when he knew she needed it.

there are probably at least 10 more examples of the point im trying to prove (i can think of 5 off the top of my head), but i dont want to reiterate what ive already said. Sonic represents freedom, the present, and change. he will fight for these indiscriminately.

"sonic just wants to be best friends with his enemies"

WRONG thats only in the idw comics. extremely loud incorrect buzzer.

[atsumiye]

you’re sitting next to suna rintaro on the train.

and things would all be fine and dandy had you two not just been through what you would call, the worst breakup of the century. because you know you both have at least 10 more stops before he possibly gets off and 12 more until you need to get off. and with no other free seats it seems the universe wanted to make your day even worse.

you can tell he is just as uncomfortable as you are, and you're trying to keep your leg from touching his, but the woman next to you finds it impossible to stay still, so you end up much closer to him than you would like. and you never meant to sit next to each other, but you happened to get on at the same stop and sat down before you looked to your left and he looked to his right and your heads have never snapped forward so fast.

he coughs once, then twice before asking, "hey y/n, how are you?"

you keep your eyes trained onto the shoes you are wearing- a birthday gift he got you from 2 years ago and out of all days, today was the first day you could put them on without wanting to cry.

"im good. how are you?" you can feel his eyes trained on the side of your head, begging for some sort of acknowledgement, something that shows him that you still care.

"good."

"cool."

"cool."

after some silence, you hear him take a breath in and you know hes about to say something big because you remember how he always twists the ring on his pointer finger and takes a deep breath before he drops some news. the same way he did when he broke up with you.

"look, i think-"

but his voice gets interrupted by the sound of your ringtone and for once in your life, you thank your lucky stars that miya atsumu decided to call you today. you silence your phone, declining the call and whispering a small 'sorry' to everyone for the volume you had left your phone at.

"you gave atsumu your new number?"

"ah, yeah he wanted it because he sometimes calls to talk, but not often." you mumble the sentence out and your eyes move from their place on your shoes to your lit up screen with a text from atsumu.

atsumu: i tried to call but you declined and first RUDE?

atsumu: but! i actually had something important to say and now you shall suffer in case you actually see him >:(

atsumu: sunarin also went to the train station and i think hes taking the same train home

y/n: its a bit late for that stupid.

and sliding your phone back into your bag, you ignore the constant buzzing, most likely from atsumu trying to get all the details he can of the literal train wreck this situation has become.

"uh, i was saying earlier how im really sorry for the way things ended y/n. i've regretted it every day since and i just-"

he abruptly stops his sentence, and you can only assume he probably changed his mind or he just doesn't care about this situation anymore. and you think maybe it would be a better option to just walk home at this point.

"cant you look at me?" he whispers out and you sigh, "i dont want to suna."

"im sorry."

"okay."

"y/n, please. i just want to talk." he leans forward in his seat to get a better view of your face, "you changed your number. you didn't answer the door. you sent back all the things i mailed. you wouldn't allow anyone to tell me how you are. how was i supposed-"

"did you love me suna?"

he sputters, "of course i did y/n. what kind of question is that?"

"then let me move on." he watches you drop your head as a few tears silently fall into your lap, "if i meant anything to you, please. just let me move on."

and as your stop gets called, you’re grateful for whatever supernatural power made the train seem like it moved faster as you stand up and wait near the door, willing yourself to keep some of your dignity and save the tears for home. as the doors open, you step out tightening your hold on your bag and begin walking to the exit, only to turn back around at the sound of suna yelling.

"no." he stands up to meet you at the open door, still inside the train, "you meant everything to me and that's why i wont let you go. not until you give us one more try. ill do anything i can to get you back just once more. you got that y/n?"

you stand there speechless, finally meeting eyes with the one person you never wanted to see again.

and the doors to the train close.

part of the series; look at me

[thenastyotherblog]

Hello!!! Can you maybe write some hc's of Hizashi having a partner who takes care of them a lot and loves giving them gifts, thank you!!!

A caring Partner whose love language is gift giving? Oh, yes, that shit is good.

Hopefully these are ok! I have fun writing them!

Present Mic with a Caring/Gift Giver Partner

Having three jobs is a heavy tool, so Mic appreaciates anything you do to make his routine easier for him.

He is grateful even for the little things you do for him daily, things like:

Making him breakfast every morning.

Arrange Mic's hair/skin routine in advance and in order -lets be real that hair must take a long time to style, so he is very thankful when he gets in the bathroom and you already put all the products, hairbrushes, combs out for him.

Having all his things ready for him -car keys, school stuff, throat spray.- for when he heads out.

When you help him warm up his voice before leaving.

You dont let him go if he doesnt and seriously he thinks you are so adorable when you stop him right in the door and ask him to warm up.

Making him wear a jacket + scarf combo when its too cold outside

Or remind him to take water when its too hot.

Mic prefers your cooking over eating on the UA's cafeteria.

Cant wait to see what you make for him everyday -and you never dissapoint-.

Absolutely brags about it with everyone, specially when you make his food in a funny/cute shape.

Thinks its adorable when you check on him before and after his show.

"Dont forget to take water! Love you! see you at home!"

Mic usually gets home very late and while he doesnt want you to miss any sleep waiting for him, it certainly makes his entire day when you do.

His heart just flutters when you welcome him home.

I feel like he appreaciates more when you take care of him after long days.

Days where he just dont or cant do anything beside probably crawl to bed and pass out from exahustion.

Helping him grade all the assigments he couldnt do because hero work.

Mumbles words of appreciation while you lead him to a warm bath, almost falling asleep as you help him wash his hair.

Checking his vocal cords yet again.

Patching him up if he comes back injuried.

"Im sorry Songbird"

"Shh is ok Zashi, Im glad you came back safe"

Reassuring him that he is never too loud, or annoying.

He sometimes need to hear those words.

Sending him pictures of little trinkets that reminds you of him.

"Look Zashi! Is you!" Mostly with a picture of something with birds -specially parrots or cockatoos- attached.

Keeps all the small gifts- small plushies or figurines, keychains- you gave him on his desk and he is running out of space for them.

There was this time you bought him a bright yellow parrot pattern tie. -look at me in the eye and tell me he wouldnt wear it-

Oh you better believe he uses it every fancy hero event he goes.

Most of his coworkers -Aizawa Im talking about him- believes the tie is horrendous but that aint stopping him to wear it.

Goes in a rant about the lastest thing you gave him.

"YO! Check out this sick keychain my partner gave me!"

Is surprised and a bit nervous when you get him expensive stuff out of nowhere.

Such like vinyls or new leather jacket.

Did he forgot an important date? You guys anniversary? Birthday??? He is rummaging his brain to remember what day it is.

"BABE WHATS THE OCATION??! THIS IS EXPENSIVE!"

"None? I been saving a bit! You been looking for this one havent you?"

Tears up, promising you to get you something back.

You want to really make this man weep?

HANDMADE GIFTS.

Doesnt matter what it is, or how well they are made, he will absolutely love anything you made for him.

Proudly wears the first scarf you knit for him even when its all wonky or way too long.

You have made him many others since but he says that one is his favorite.

Has a collection of bead bracelets to choose from.

Little knitted plushies.

These are the gifts he keeps the most on his desk, cuz they remind him of you most.

I bet Mic would a sucker for scrapbooks where you collect souvenirs from dates you had.

Of course, the classic mixtape.

If you take the time and patience to make an actual tape and not like a spotify list he is gonna be all over you for weeks.

[wandaromanova]

hii! great work. can i request a really sad oneshot with wanda x fem!reader on a mission and r's about to die and wanda panics and cries but both of their comms are malfunctioning, and r impromptu proposes to wanda and even jokes around and tells her all about their plans for the future as a married couple but apologizes because she cant make those plans anymore and the backup arrives but they're all too late. would really appreciate if you'd make it sad as hell (i'm in for the emotional torture) thank you very much!

If Only

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Fem!Reader

Warnings: cussing, death, angst

A/N: hello! wow really pulling out the angst with this request. heartbreaking one shot? you’re speaking my language. hope you enjoy! not proofread. join my taglist <3

Summary: A mission gone wrong takes everything away from Wanda.

Word Count: 2K

(gif is not mine)

You and your girlfriend, Wanda were Avengers. Being apart of “the earth’s mightiest heroes” was amazing. You had the ability to protect and save people on the daily, but it also had its cons. You were all constantly thrown into life threatening situations. The thought that one day, one of your teammates wouldn’t make it back to the compound terrified you. Especially if it were Wanda. You couldn’t even do much as think about something happening to her; you wouldn’t survive if she didn’t make it home one day.

You had been dating Wanda for 3 years. You met her when the whole Ultron situation went down. You guys quickly became friends and turned into something more. You loved her more than anyone or anything. You’d stop at nothing to protect her. You’d quite literally do anything to keep Wanda out of harm’s way.

Now, here you were with the team. You were all on the Quinjet on your way to a major Hydra base. Destroying this base was important. They had been working on very destructive and dangerous weapons in that base. You guys had to blow the place to the ground and prevent them from using any of their new toys.

You were sat beside Wanda while the team prepared for battle. You looked towards Wanda and it was painfully obvious that she was nervous. You raised your eyebrows at her as she was currently zoned out, looking at the wall in front of you both.

“Penny for your thoughts?” You asked quietly so Wanda would be the only one to hear the question. She snapped out of her trance at the sound of your voice and whipped her head to the side to face you.

“It’s nothing.” Wanda dismissed your concern as her gaze returned to the wall, refusing to look you in the eye. You were even more concerned now.

“You’ve always been a terrible liar, babe. What’s wrong? You can tell me, you know that.” You say as you grab her hand that was closest to you. Wanda let out a sigh as she returned her gaze to you once more.

“I just… I have this bad feeling. I feel as if this mission is a bad idea and that we should turn around now, while we still have the chance.” Wanda whispered quietly, her voice so gentle and small, with so much fear present. Your heart ached at the terror on her face.

“Wands, we’ve been on way tougher missions than this one. It’ll be fine, we’ll make it back home in no time and we can finish season 4 of The Dick Van Dyke show together when we get back.” You gave her a reassuring smile as you gave her hand a tight squeeze. Wanda, although not convinced, gave you a tight-lipped smile back as she squeezed your hand back.

“We land in five. Everyone get into position and remember the plan. Plant the bombs, Tony starts the countdown, and get out.” Steve spoke in his “Captain voice,” you called it, as he made his way to the entrance of the jet. You and Wanda stood up and faced each other.

“I love you.” You said as you grabbed both of her hands in hers before kissing them and placing them above your heart. “I love you too.” Wanda said shakily as she removed her hands from your chest and gave you a harsh kiss. You could feel the desperation and fear in the way she kissed you. It was as if it would be the last. You knew it wouldn’t be, but you humored her and kissed her back just as urgently.

After that, the jet landed and you all made your way into the base. You and Natasha were paired together to go into the heart of the building and plant the bombs. You both made it in with little to no effort. There were a few Hydra agents that you guys quickly took care of. As you both made it to the room that was in the heart of the building, you had planted your bomb and secured it before turning to Natasha.

“You good?” You asked Natasha as she finished placing the bomb on the wall. “Yeah, you?” She asks back as she faces you.

“Yeah, I’m all good. Let’s get out of here.” You spoke as you guys made it out the door of the room you were in. However, you should have known it wouldn’t be that easy. There were at least 20 Hydra agents waiting for you both outside. You and Natasha began to fight with the agents before a beeping sound had caught everyone’s attention. The bomb, Tony must’ve started the timer. Fuck.

You knew the timer was set for 5 minutes. There was no way you’d both make it out of there in time. Natasha was like a sister to you and you refused to let her die. As you grunted, fighting off two agents at once, you spoke to Natasha.

“Nat. You have to get out of here. This place is going to blow.” You spoke as you knocked the two agents out. Natasha turned to face you as she knocked another agent out cold. “Like hell I’m going to leave you here. Absolutely not.” Natasha sent you a glare as she began to fight another agent, you doing the same.

“Nat. We can’t have two dead Avengers. You have to leave. Now.” You spoke as Natasha stared at you. “GO! NOW!” You yelled as 5 more Hydra agents filed into the hallway.

Natasha hesitated before rushing out of the building. As you finished off the final 5, you made your way back into the room you guys planted the bombs. You only have 2 minutes left. There was no way you could make it out in that time. You were done for.

You shakily placed your hand on your ear and activated your com. “Wanda, baby.” Your voice came out wearily as you stared at the bomb, counting down the last moments of your life.

“Y/N? Where the hell are you?” Wanda asked hurriedly as she stood outside in the Quinjet. Her gaze was set on the doors of the building, waiting to see you rush through the doors and back into her arms.

“Uh… don’t be mad, but I’m kinda sorta still in the building. I think I’m going to have to take a rain check on our Dick Van Dyke plans.” You let out a forced laugh in an attempt to calm Wanda, but that didn’t work.

“WHAT? I’m going in to get you.” Wanda spokes as Steve held her back. She pushed him back with her powers before the other Avengers tried to hold her back to. Tony began to get to work, attempting to disable the bombs from the source.

You panicked as you spoke back to her through the comms. “I said don’t be mad! Don’t come in. You won’t make it to me in time Wands. I love you so god damn much. Thank you for the happiest 3 years of my life, I wish we had more time.” You spoke fast as you noticed you only had one minute left. A crazy thought entering your mind.

“Will you marry me, Wanda?” You asked her through the comms and the team’s hearts broke at your question. Wanda stopped her fighting as tears began to fill her eyes.

“Wha- yes. Of course I’ll marry you baby. But you’ll have to get out of there first.” Wanda shakily replied as she allowed the tears to fall freely across her cheeks. She never once looked away from the building that held you; the love of her life.

“We’ll have a big, beautiful wedding with the entire team there. Afterwards, we’ll buy a little house in the suburbs and have children of our own running around.” The comms began to act up at this point. You ignored her last statement as you came in broken and static, but Wanda heard every word. Your words broke her even more, knowing that this would never be possible for you both now.

“Tony! Hurry the fuck up!” Wanda screamed at the billionaire as he typed away. “I’m going as fast as I can! I’m almost done!” He yelled back, just as frustrated. You were like a daughter to him. He refused to let you die when he can do something to stop it.

“Then, we’ll grow old together and meet our grandchildren. We’d spoil the hell out of them. And we would die together and live a life together in the afterlife. If only we had more time… I- it’s about to blow. Wanda, I lo-“ Your little speech was interrupted and comms were cut off by the building exploding into pieces.

Tony was too late. He had been a millisecond too late, but that was all it took to take you away from this world. Away from the team. The weight of grief and failure hung over the Avengers as they stood silently, in shock.

“It should’ve been me.” Natasha spoke as her voice broke. Natasha cared deeply for you. You had both been the only women on the team before Wanda joined. So naturally, you guys stuck together. If Natasha had stayed with you, you at least wouldn’t have died alone. You didn’t deserve this. Natasha should’ve stayed. But it was a little too late for that. All Natasha and the rest of the team could do was mourn and cry.

Wanda fell to her knees and sobbed as the building you were in was now nothing but rubble, fire, and smoke. You had proposed to her and told her about the future you wanted with her in the final moments of your life. You guys were supposed to live a long, happy life together and live out your dreams together.

Now, Wanda would have to live out the rest of her days without you. She wouldn’t have you by her side to hold her when life got rough. She wouldn’t hear your laugh as you laughed at her terrible jokes in an attempt to make her feel better. She wouldn’t wake up to you beside her anymore. She wouldn’t walk down the aisle with you stood at the altar, tears in your eyes as you took her white dress in.

She wouldn’t be able to buy a house with you and have a family with you, like you said earlier. She wouldn’t get to turn old and grey with you as you guys spent the last moments of your life holding onto one another for dear life. All these moments and opportunities were cruelly snatched away by this stupid fucking mission. Something that was supposed to be easy, a smooth sailing type of mission, took a turn for the worse.

If only you guys had met under different circumstances, maybe you would still be alive. Maybe if Wanda had been with you, she could’ve saved you and gotten you both out of there on time. All these different scenarios made their way into Wanda’s mind, all the things she could’ve done ate at her. She felt like she was drowning in despair. She hadn’t felt this broken since she lost Pietro. Not only did she lose her brother, now she lost the love of her life. The person she wanted to spend forever with, was now gone forever.

Wanda was sad and angry. She was devastated that you would no longer be present in her life. All the promises you had made to each other now broken by death. She was also angry at the world. Had she not dealt with enough loss? Was her family not enough? Now she had to lose the love of her life? Her soulmate? The one person who got her through all her grief and trauma? Why was the universe so fucking cruel to her?

The Avengers had lost a team mate, a sister, a lover. As the team cried and held onto each other, this massive loss affecting them all, Wanda could only think one thing. She knew that you guys should’ve turned around. She knew it.

[shotforfavor]

assigning a mychem song to each tma entity :o)

i dont have anything for dark and buried. umm. also i dont know how to put a cut in a post sorry

corruption- demolition lovers. the relationship isnt good for either of them, but hes still willing to die for her ("im trying to let you know just how much you mean to me, after all the things we put each other through") all of his expressions of love for her are violent in nature ("id end my days with you in a hail of bullets" "you're the only one, like a bed of roses theres a dozen reasons in this gun") their love is built on violence, its hurting both of them, yet he still wants to die with her to prove his love and devotion to her

desolation- early sunsets over monroeville. life is perfect, him and his lover are on a mall date, feels like a movie. ("then holding hands and life was perfect") then it all comes crumbling down out of nowhere when a zombie outbreak kinda thing happens and said lover is bit. ("not knowing you'd change from just one bite, i fought them all off just to hold you close") he can't exactly leave the mall he's hiding in, ("trapped in by all these mountains") and now he has to kill the one good thing he has left. then he's just defeated. he has nothing else worth living for. "but does anything matter if you're already dead?"

end- the end. obvz. "when i grow up i want to be nothing at all" most of the song to me is him expressing he wants to die/he knows hes going to, and he takes it very casually, buttttt the very end of the song... "save me, get me the hell out of here, save me, too young to die my dear, you cant take me" hes afraid of death when actually facing it

extinction- scarecrow. this ones about a nuclear bomb and trying to run from your death and look at things positively even though you know everyones going to die. but theres kind of an acceptance at the end- "love wont stop this bomb, run, run, bunny, run" after this point, the only lyrics are saying to run and hide. no more "i'll keep you safe tonight", no more romanticism that makes the destruction sound poetic and almost beautiful. just running and hiding and hoping someone makes it out alive

eye- teenagers. me personally i think this one fits. "because they sleep with a gun and keep an eye on you, son, so they can watch all the things you do" he feels like he's constantly being watched by the adults in his life, and they're just waiting for him to make one wrong move that they can use to justify calling him a bad person. he stands out, his classmates make fun of him and spread rumors about him. in the context of the song, the lyrics are all rebelling against all of this, but on their own, they sound very paranoid about what others think of them

flesh- cancer. i think this one works, the patient expresses a lot of hatred for what his body is becoming due to the disease in verse 2 especially. "turn away, cause im awful just to see" its got the aspects of insecurity and physical change out of ones control characteristic of the flesh.

hunt- vampires will never hurt you. this one isnt really a fear of being prey, but rather his fear of becoming the hunter. "can you stake my heart?" "i'll never let them hurt you, i promise" he feels that his vampirism is a different side of him completely, one thats out of his control. he'd rather be killed now than lose control and make his loved ones his prey.

lonely- ghost of you. he lost someone important, and he can't stop thinking about it and replaying their memories in his head because he doesn't want to forget them, but dwelling is only making him miss them more. ("if i died, we'd be together now, i can't always just forget her") he just replays her death over and over in his head, constantly reminded that he's now alone. ("i remember now, at the top of my lungs in my arms, she dies" "all the things that you never ever told me, all the smiles that are ever gonna haunt me, never coming home, never coming home")

slaughter- mama. i mean its literally about a soldier who did awful things during a war and his mother can't help but hate him for it. "but there's shit that i've done with this fuck of a gun, you would cry out your eyes all along" he acknowledges that he fought his hardest because he thought he'd die at war ("so raise your glass high, for tomorrow we die") and his mother would be even more terrified of him than she already is if she knew the full extent of it. the song even ends with her sobbing

spiral- drowning lessons. after the death of his lover, he is haunted by a manifestation of his guilt that takes her form and makes him relive the day over and over again ("lets say goodbye a hundredth time and then tomorrow, we'll do it again"). he desperately wants it to go away but his own mind wont leave him be ("without a sound, i wish you away" "i adore every inch of sanity, all im asking for"). a lot of things in the song also sound like hes experiencing visions of her death, twisted by his brain- describing her as a "twisted shell" and saying "these hands, stained red from all the times that ive killed you"

stranger- blood. i dont know this one just really fits to me? "well they encourage your complete cooperation, send you roses when they think you need to smile" "so give them blood, blood, gallons of the stuff, give them all that they can drink and it will never be enough" does this not give the image of like weirdly happy all the time doctors who keep doing procedures on you but you dont know like what exactly they're doing ever. also the very fun chipper tone and its contrast with the disturbing lyrics is very stranger core to me

vast- disenchanted. this one might be a stretch? after all his attempts to make life meaningful, he's left thoroughly disappointed. he realizes at the end of his life that everything has all been meaningless. he thinks life itself is overrated.

web- the jetset life is gonna kill you. this ones about drug addiction but the song portrays that as a woman who's controlling his life. "gaze into her killing jar, id sometimes stare for hours" she has him completely trapped and in the palm of her hand. "alright, she wants it all to come down this time"

very much willing to discuss any of these

[bonny-kookoo]

Ready Player 01 | JJK x Reader | 🔞❤️☁️

Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader

Genre: dystopia!AU, former Game developer!Jk, former pro gamer!JK, former IT specialist!Reader, former programmer!Reader, romance, Smut, slight cyberpunk elements

Warnings/tags: injustice, forcefully controlled public, violence (police/government officials against citizens), unfair powerplay, interrogation, tech talk, Jungkook be antisocial as FUCK but so is the reader lmao wbk, fear of physical contact (Haphephobia), past trauma and mentions of a bad childhood, insomnia, crime, smut because yes it’s me hello my content isn't kiddy-proof in the first place what yall want from me I'm not sure, but that’s waaY at the end ya know, friends to lovers, a slightly sassy AI but we love her, reader struggles with emotions, I mean same tbh, they're both so sweet tho I cant, not proofread because let me live

Summary: there’s a war going on; silent, but it’s there. Media has been strictly become controlled and regulated- to the point of making it illegal to own a TV or phone with internet access without a valid license. But there’s always some people that will try to break free from the controlling force.

"-a new age. This is a new year. And remember; we're doing this for the greater good. Until tomorrow." The news reporter stops talking after she somberly looks somewhere behind the camera that is pointed at her.

Your room is dark- the TV brightness on it's lowest setting so you can see what's going on- but outside, no one can see the light shining in your tiny apartment. Investing in blackout curtains had really paid off at the end of the day.

You don't want to get caught.

There's an announcement van driving past your window; the tiny slits in your curtains where the light from outside can creep its way inside brightening a bit as the headlights pass your windows. Something is spoken, and by now everyone knows the routine speech.

"Electricity will be shut down in five minutes. We advice to save all progress immediately- and we wish a good nights rest. Electricity will be shut down in five minutes..-" It repeats, over and over, counting down the minutes. You slowly move into your kitchen, opening one of the loose floor tiles to turn on your own emergency electricity system. With well practiced movements you close the tile again, moving the rug over it as you walk back into your living room, swiftly sliding the TV behind your wardrobe to make it disappear. As if on cue; there's a knock at your door.

The same as always. Routine. Two times, loud and clear. You don't even have to look through the peephole to know what awaits behind it.

"Yes?" You ask, rubbing your eyes as if you had been already asleep. The officer behind the door nods at you shortly, a mild smile on his face as he looks down at you.

"We didn't mean to wake you miss. Just routine, as usual." He says, peeking into your apartment to look for any electronics still running. It's pitch black however- so he simply nods, as his colleague notes something into his tablet. "We wish a good nights rest miss. Again, sorry for intruding." He apologizes, and you nod, closing the door.

Only when the street lights turn dark, do you move from your bed.

"Creator." The AI voice chimes up, her voice greeting you as as you lift the tile on the floor again- your phone connecting to the AI to show information you instantly decode and note down inside your head. "Player01 has just connected." The voice states, and you sit down on your cold kitchen flooring, smiling a little. "He has sent a message. Would you like me to play it?" The voice asks, and you take a deep breath.

"Yes." You say, and there's a small sound indicating the start of the voice message. A male voice is head.

"Hey, whats up?" He asks, and you can hear something in the background- maybe an empty can or something similar. "I uh.. I'm on my way. Should I bring anything? Ah wait, I know the answer to that.." He says, chuckling at the end of his sentence, and you can hear him zip up his jacket as he moves around. "Yeah uh.. just text or something, I'll bring stuff over. Can't have you starve." He ends, and the AI speaks up again.

"Would you like to repeat the message?" She asks, and you shake your head at her; a signal the artificial intelligence has come to detect quite well. "Should I archive it?" She questions again, and this time, you nod- something your invisible assistant can pick up due to motion sensoring.

"Send him a message." You say. "Tell him: I only need you. Get yourself here in one piece and I'm happy. And I'm very capable of taking care of myself." You state, and your phone shows a small loading message- indicating that the voice is doing as you said. It chimes up after a moment. "Thanks Kana." You say.

"No problem creator. Would you like for me to run through the databases now?" She asks, and you nod, a smile on your face. "Database search in progress. Estimated time: sixteen minutes and eighteen seconds." You huff out a breath as you look at the tiny display on your arm; tiny, yet powerful as it's your way of keeping Kana- your AI assistent- close at all times. Tonight, there would seem to be a lot to dig through.

They really added a lot of content these days.

It's not the door that makes you notice that there's a visitor after a while- He never uses it anyways for some reason. You're sitting on your kitchen floor with a small cup of tea in your hands- kept hot inside a slightly beaten-looking thermos can since you can't use to water boiler at night. Using anything other than Kana would cause a spike the police would be sure to notice; and you're not ready to get caught yet.

Not tonight.

It's a boy who, after a moment, opens the unclosed kitchen window to climb in; his combat boots getting a little snow and dirt from the outside into your apartment as his 80's looking jacket makes distinctive noises as it brushes against the sides of your window. His blonde hair has grown out a bit these days you notice- the roots clearly showing. It's a little wet and slightly curly from the moisture. It must be snowing outside- or maybe it had. You couldn't know for sure.

You never left your apartment.

He closes the window after slipping on the tiles inside a little, the plastic bags noisy as he almost drops them- sheepishly taking off his boots as he smiles at you. His socks are different from one another- but that's another thing so distinctive and just so.. him. He's his own person, always has been; it's what brought you two together, after all. You both stood out against the 'regular public' these days; with his brightly almost white-bleached hair he was like an albino in a sea of crows.

But you knew he didn't need that to stand out to you.

You can still remember the first few times the boy in front of you has visited you; the times where he had just dyed his hair to rebel out, or when he pierced your ears in exchange for you to do it to him as well. It was like you had made a blood pact in your kitchen that night- you had somehow gotten closer, formed a little more than just a simple companionship in order to riot against the law. He began growing close. Gave you a nickname. Began calling you his player 2. Began calling you his 'ace'. He had explained that he thought of it from memories of his gaming days; the two fighting teams always called red and blue, and one of his favorite weapons having that nickname- simply because it always 'saved his ass last minute'. He had rambled on about his last tournament after that, eyes sparkling and cheeks round from cold noodles.

You had become friends.

"hey." He says after sitting close across from you on the cold floor; the opened tile and Kana's core exposed to you two, the only source of light apart from your bracelet. The colorful LED's paint marks on his face and illuminate his features to you; but it does the same to you from his point of view. It's a familiar sight. "How are you?" He asks, almost shyly, but you know that's not what's bothering him.

"Hey Jungkook." You simply say with the hint of a smile, as you answer him. "Haven't slept well these days but, what's new I guess." You chuckle, and Jungkook smiles too- though a glimpse of concern is still shown your way. He knows however that forcing you to sleep won't do much good- your insomnia was too bad to really conquer it in a day or two just by taking naps.

And also; who was he to talk about solving personal issues.

"Have you seen the most recent reports?" You ask him, and the boy somberly shakes his head.

"I was unable to." He states. "They were patrolling close to my apartment complex because there had been someone reporting a Glitcher today." A 'glitcher'- a slang word now commonly used for people like Jungkook and you. People who went against the nightly routines, people who tried to trick the system by using electricity at night, owning media, consuming it, or dealing with it. It somehow became worse than underground drugs. "They pulled him out at around twelve or so- but they seemed too on edge the entire day, so I didn't risk it." He says, and you nod. Jungkook had always been a very good person when it came to calculating risk versus reward. He was good at reading people too- even though he didn't interact much, he got out of his apartment a lot more than you did. "Anything important?" He asks, and you shrug.

"There was a report that China and Japan were still on edge- with the chinese government arguing that they would soon start with 'more drastic measures to get things under proper control', whatever that means." You say, and Jungkooks brows furrow as he starts to pick on the skin of his jaw. "Let's just hope the flood doesn't throw us under the sea as well if it escalates I guess.." You say, and the boy across from you nods.

"Creator." Kana's voice chimes up, making Jungkook look up before remembering that the only source would be your bracelet, which you look at as well. "My scan of your body shows that you have not consumed a sufficient amount of calories today. I recommend a meal in the next five to eight minutes to avoid malnutrition." She says, and you groan. "I take this as a form of verbal communication. Running data search..." She says, as Jungkook looks at you; thoroughly amused by the teasing banter between the AI and his friend. "My data search concludes that you are annoyed, creator. I have only stated a fact however-" She continues, and Jungkook steps in.

"I've brought some leftovers from my dinner today we can eat." He says, pulling out some plastic containers as he moves to get proper cutlery out of your drawers. He makes sure to push them towards you, making sure to nod with a smile as you nod and thank him a little embarrassed. "It's nothing. You know I love you too much to let you starve!" He states with a grin, bunny teeth on full display as bitterness creeps up your throat- something you make sure to swallow down before beginning to eat.

Because the kind of love he's talking about right now, is not the kind of love you want him to feel for you.

"You forgot to give it a proper validation there-" He points out as you type away. "Otherwise it will just run instantly, and everything at once. That could crash older systems, and we know that V95 uses an older laptop, so we should take that into account." He says, and you nod, clicking back to the spot Jungkook is talking about.

This is what you're both good for.

Writing code for you had always been something you did with a passion- simply because you were good at it. Numbers and short phrases were something you could remember with ease; but you never had to think much about the visual aspect of programs in your department back when you were able to work for a simple programming company. You had simply always been tasked to program security systems and automatically updating firmware, or simple AI's for factory robots. Jungkook however had been all about the visuals; he had been programming games after all. That's why you two fit so well together in this scene. Whenever he would be in complete awe of the broad knowledge you had about official guidelines and security breaches, of staying undetected and unseen while still gaining as much as possible from every single line of code, he could always throw in his input to make sure the program you were both writing and updating for the glitch community was easy to use and simple enough so it could run smoothly on as many systems as possible. Be it phone, laptops, PC's- you two made it possible.

This program was connecting Glitchers all over the globe- and with yours and Jungkooks knowledge, you made it almost invisible. And even if it was somehow detected; there was no possible way to track down any of it's users.

The fact that you had to hide a simple program from the government made you sigh.

"Okay. Yeah I think that fixed the bug." He says, and looks at your arm- at Kana. "Oh, by the way, Kana?" he asks, and the chime gives him the cue to talk. "I heard you had a bug-fix too recently." He says, and the AI chimes again.

"I did, Player01." The AI answers. "The addition of code to my current program has proven to significantly increase my ability to observe and save more data." The female voice answers, and Jungkook grins. "You are happy, Player01." She states, and he nods.

"I am." He says.

"Why is that?" The AI asks, and Jungkook shrugs.

"I'm just happy you're doing well. Someone has to take care of ace when I'm not close by, yeah?" He states, and you try not to react to it. Jungkook is by now used to your more stoic expression; you're not too emotional and barely let things get under your skin. You've been hurt before, he knows this even if you never told him- he can see it in the way you hide inside the safety of your home, how you're so cold on the outside but still clinging onto him. Sometimes he wishes he could touch you; run his hand over your head to ruffle your hair like in those cheesy movies, hold your hand, or simply give you some reassurance in the form of a gentle hand on your back whenever you struggle.

But he's got his own demons, and they love clinging onto him just as much.

"V95 has connected to voice chat. Would you like to talk to him?" Kana states, ripping him out of his thoughts as he watches you nod.

"JK? Y/N?" A deep voice asks.

"We're here. Heard there was a raid close to you?" Jungkook asks, and he can see you grow a bit more serious at that. "Are you okay?" He adds, and V answers, although quite.. tired?

"I'm good. They got Jimin though." He states, and you sigh, running a hand through your hair as you stand up, frustrated. Jungkook knows you're trying to calm down by pacing. He doesn't mind. "They didn't officially arrest him, took him for 'questioning' though. We know what that's about." He states somberly, and Jungkook takes a deep breath.

"Jimin is a master manipulator V. He'll get himself out of it, I'm sure." Jungkook tries to reassure, but it doesn't gain him much than a hum from Taehyung on the other end of the line. "What about Sleeper?" He asks, and a chuckle is heard.

"He's been checking the videofeed from inside the past few nights. He said he's send some of the big bites to Ace though?" He says, and Jungkook looks over at your form.

"Yeah I've seen it." You simply say, though Jungkook grows uncomfortable with the way you're suddenly standing there. You're a little hunched, biting the skin on your thumb as you look at the tiles as if they suddenly began to move. He knows himself that things inside the 'rehabilitation centers' weren't all that nice to see- but you rarely ever displayed so much distress over it. "Let's just hope Jimin get's his ass out of this situation. We can't afford to loose him." You say, and V stays silent before he sighs.

"Yeah. I tell sleeper you've seen the stuff. Oh, and our prince charming has asked for a date with Ace. Again." Taehyung chuckles, and you groan- while Jungkook can't help but clench his jaw. Kim Seokjin was a very good asset to the team; with connections reaching deep inside the government and his position as a former lawyer- but he still hated his guts.

You didn't need to waste your time dating. You were totally capable of taking care of yourself, you had even said it personally! And for anything else Jungkook would provide for you. You didn't need anyone else than him.

He was totally not jealous of him.

"Can he not use our underground connections for that circus?" You say. "I don't even go grocery shopping, why would I want to go on a fucking date?" You mumble, sitting down next to Jungkook as you take a spoonful of rice. Jungkook feels a weird sense of satisfaction about the situation.

"Who knows." Taehyung says. "Alright, 10 Minute mark- I'll hear from you two soon. Take care." He says, and you both say your goodbyes before the line goes silent.

Although Jungkook hates physical contact, he likes keeping you close.

His heart is melting like chocolate as he notes the way your hand grips his jacket tightly as the two of you walk through town to get your license renewed- a way of holding onto him, and he somehow wishes it could be his hand. He knows yours would fit so perfectly in his, and yet he can't bring himself to do it.

His body is not cooperating.

He remembers vividly how his fear had developed; with his father and mother both being dramatically overworked and overwhelmed with having a kid at a young age, they had no idea how to make a child behave. Every second touch would bruise, every time he had been held would be force.

And at some point, he started to dislike physical touch completely.

It had just been like his growing interest in freelance climbing- the way he would walk and jump high over the heads of unsuspecting people, away from all judgemental gazes they'd throw his way for behaving the way he did. Only when the wind could hit him freely, only when he couldn't make out faces of anyone down below, only when he was high up- that was when he felt safe. The ground below had nothing of interest for him, no point in going down, as his apartment was located on the top floor of the complex. Jungkook never took the elevator, always the stairs.

He liked being reminded how high he lived.

And yet, there's one thing that pulls him down, brings his feet to the earth below, calls him like a siren song. It's you, hidden away from everyone's sight inside your tiny home, just as troubled and judged as himself.

He'd fallen in love with you the second you told him his name.

It had been a rainy night, his clothes drying on your heater as he was wrapped in two of your blankets; the smell of your fabric softener and something so typically you surrounding him like a mother's hug would a child. It had given him a feeling of comfort he had never quite experienced before, and it had also been the first time he had imagined what it would be like to hug you.

To have you close.

He had explained to you why he had freaked out when you reached for his arm to steady him when he almost fell inside your apartment through your window; had apologized and bowed his head in shame until you had simply shrugged.

"You don't have to justify yourself to anyone, Jungkookie." You had said. Jungkookie. "You're you. And I like you." You had said, not looking at him as you typed in some code to Kana's internal system.

His heart had warmed up at that.

And while you had accepted him, he had accepted you just as much. While at first caught off guard by your quiet and sometimes harsh way of treating him, he had also gotten to know just how gentle and delicately you treated the ones you loved. You were a loyal person, always going out of your way to be helpful, and silently basking in praise any time it was directed at you.

He loved that view. The way your cheeks would grow warm, how your eyes would sparkle; and he loved most of all, that he had been, according to Taehyung who was the second closest to you, the only one to see you smile.

You even laughed with him.

It filled him with pride to know that you were able to let go around him, even if it was just a little. It made him feel like he did something huge. It helped him sleep at night knowing that you were trusting him enough to let down your guard a little.

And it hurt him even worse knowing that he couldn't do the same thing for you.

He was a coward-

and you deserved a hero.

"Ace?" He asked, slipping through your window as he noticed the apartment silent and dark. Nothing greeted him. "..Ace?" He tried again, maybe you were asleep? But your apartment was quiet, empty, nothing spoke of your presence. Dishes were in the sink, a cup of water left untouched on the counter, and something inside of him churned painfully at the way this looked. He checked the kitchen tile, sliding it to the side like he's seen you do it countless of times.

It was dark.

Instead, he was greeted by a post it note. "Underneath the bed. Take care." Was all it read. He stood up, pushing your bed away from the wall noticing how your carpet had been torn a little. And as he lifted the cut flap of carpet, there was an envelope.

Your watch. A small in-ear piece, and your old IT-identification, folded.

A noise outside your hallway made his head snap up as he pushed the bed back into place, making an escape for it as he climbed outside the window, watch safely inside his jacket as he climbed back up on top of a building, before he examined it further, turning it on, after putting the earpiece in.

"Hello, Jungkook." Kana greeted him, and it felt weird to hear the AI say his name like that. "Creator has advised me to answer all questions you might have, and assist you from here on." She said, and Jungkook simply put the watch on, making his way to his own apartment.

"What happened?" He asked, his face serious as he walked.

"At around 6:12 O'clock, creator was taken into further questioning regarding illegal possession and knowledge of classified information and technological equipment. She had shown no resistance and complied with authorities. My observations however showed that she was taken with more force than necessary." Kana explained. Jungkook shook his head. "She had prepared for this instance during the night, approximately twenty-six minutes after you had left."

"She knew?!" He suddenly said, shutting his apartment door violently as he started to pace around, throwing his jacket on the couch. "Why didn't she contact me?"

"Analysis; your body shows signs of-" Kana started, but Jungkook interrupted.

"Shut up. Why didn't she tell me?" He asks again, and Kana seems to hesitate for a moment.

"Considering her close relationship to you, she probably wanted to not get you involved." She stated, and Jungkook sighed, sitting down on his couch as he gripped his hair. He should've stayed. Hell, it wasn't the first time he wanted to stay. He had dreamed of staying over, of fucking living with you for months to no end by now, but he was a coward. And this was his paycheck.

"Kana." He said lowly, and the small tune gave him the cue to talk. "Contact V95. Tell him it's urgent. We got an emergency." He says.

"I can't watch this." He says, jumping up and holding onto his head as to not punch his wall, unable to go through the videofeed of your interrogation room.

There's not much to see, but Jungkook knows that's simply because they haven't had the time to see to you yet. You and him knew best what really happened in these rooms, and he hated knowing that deep down they wouldn't go easy on you simply because you were a young woman. It didn't matter to them.

He'd seen teenagers way younger than you and him getting the rough treatment before- and elderly didn't get spared either.

The government bragged about having everything in order; yet they couldn't even control their own law enforcement it seemed. When he really thought back on his history lessons in school, not much had changed at all.

The world was still in utter chaos.

His palm shuts his laptop harshly- earning a tiny chime from the AI he’s already forgotten shares his home with him now. “I suggest that you practice care in treating your electronics to-“ he groans, successfully shutting it off at that. “Why are you frustrated?” It- she? Asks, and he sits down.

“I don’t know how to help her.” He admits in shame, thinking back to the footage of your hidden camera; the way they had pushed you to the ground, before grabbing you, leading you out of your apartment a few minutes away from him. “I don’t know what I should do.” He says.

There’s a bit of silence, until the AI speaks up again. “Do you have a romantic interest in my creator?” She asks, and his head snaps up at that.

“What the fuck? Why would you ask me this?!” He barks, unsure where to look since he can only hear the voice.

“I have observed both my creator and your behaviors; you seem to have a very deep rooted interest in each others well-being and opinions. This is commonly found in partnerships. I was only asking you to confirm if my assumption is correct.”

He’s silent for a moment, until he speaks again, watching the announcement van pass his window; voices dull and unintelligible though the walls and windows. “It’s no use anyways. Who wants someone they can’t even shake hands with?” He sighs, looking into his lap again. He hates that he’s like this; that even though he very much loves and adores you, there’s no magic moment that makes him forget- even though he craves the contact, he can’t do it. Every time he’s close to you, he knows that he could simply hug you; or let you rest your head on his shoulder, like in romantic movies. He wants to hold your hand, wipe your tears- but his body won’t cooperate. He can’t do it.

Not even with you.

“Creator seems very comfortable with you.” The AI states. “I have been asked to archive all text messages and phone calls of you two recently. When I asked for a reason, she claimed she would need it someday- I was unsure what she meant.” Jungkook furrows his brow, raising his head again. “Sometimes, when creator is deeply upset, she has the habit of playing some of the recordings of you singing, or reminding her to take care. My research has shown that it slows down her heartbeat to a more normal level and also improves her insomnia.” Jungkooks eyes widen at that.

Does that mean.. that you like him back?

"Kana, fuck- cut the feed." He says, agitated.

"Are you sure?" She asks, and he sighs, before yelling his frustration out, sitting down to take a deep breath. He slowly shook his head no. He couldn't let all your hard work go to waste like this.

He couldn't stay a coward.

"Jungkook, it appears to be that the creator is being let go." Kana suddenly chimes up, and Jungkook rushes to his pc setup to see for himself. And she's right- your arm is being held tightly, and something is being said to you, but your hands are no longer chained to the chair- you're free.

What just happened?

Jungkook sometimes really hates himself for being the way he is.

There's no sugarcoating it that you need comfort now more than ever, even though you don't openly show it to him. He can see it in the way you're still biting your nails, he can see it in your eyes which never stay on one point for too long. And he can definitely see it in the bruises on your upper arm, and the cut on your lower lip where you had bitten in anger and frustration. He wants to comfort you, he knows you'd let him- and yet he can't move any closer than where he is right now; only the length of his palm of space between you two. And yet it's like his joints are locked into place. He can't touch you.

What if he hurts you?

And it dawns on him right then and there while he watches you drink your can of overly sweet soda while typing your code like second nature, that he's not scared of you hurting him. He's scared of doing to you, what's been done to him. Because deep down he is aware that his parents never had bad intentions, never hated him or wanted him to suffer; they were simply unsure and not at all confident in how to really care for a child. They had been caught off guard and gotten overwhelmed by the sudden shift in their situation that they never truly knew what to do. And nowadays he felt like he was simply heading down the same road.

He was starting to feel like he was becoming just like them.

"Hm?" You ask him, ripping him out of his thoughts as he looks at you, your eyes wide and worried as you put down your almost empty can of soda. "What is it?" You ask him, and he wants to scream. He wants to throw a fit like a child at the way you seem to worry for him every time you should worry for yourself. He's a coward, he's useless, he's everything you don't need nor deserve in his eyes, and yet you always look at him like he's the main character of your favorite movie.

If he was, he was sure he'd be merely a sidekick- because you deserved to be the focus of every story told in his eyes. And if you weren't included in the tale, he knew he didn't want to ever know about it.

He swallows, before he manages to make his hand move, finger pointing at your arm where a green-ish bruise already formed. "Does it hurt?" He asks, and he's not even sure if he's asking you about the bruise, of if he's asking something else. He doesn't know what he's saying, doesn't even know if he's asking you or himself.

"No." You answer, and he looks at you, searching for any hint of a lie in your eyes. But he only sees that slight smile, lips turned a little, almost unnoticeable. But its there, he can see it, and he wants to print it into his mind to never forget it. You were so observant, knew him so well, that he was almost certain you knew of his inner fight and what he really meant with his blurted out question. "Are you okay?" You ask him, and he swallows again, eyes stinging with unshed tears as his body grows rigid like an unoiled machine, only moving with as much force as he can manage to come up with. His breathing is heavy as his eyes can't leave the spot on your arm, and your watch him with wide eyes as his shaking hand slowly reaches out.

He doesn't know what he expects to really happen.

Maybe like those electric shocks you get when someone had rubbed their socks on a carpet before touching someone else. Maybe he had expected to recoil instantly. Maybe he had expected nothing- but he was suddenly in a rush the moment his fingertip touched your warm skin, delicate, soft, everything his rough hands weren't.

And you were still as prey in front of a wolf.

But the wolf in this scenario was holding his breath while his tears finally fell. He wants to speak, but he can't, he doesn't know how to ask for something when he doesn't even know if he wants it.

But suddenly he moves again, his palm now resting fully against your upper arm, shaking, as it moves over the length of it, softly, as he imprints the way your soft skin feels. "Jungkook.." You whisper out, and he suddenly snaps, leans forward, his legs on either side of your body as he snakes his arms around you from behind, pulling you close to his chest. You can feel him shake as he holds you, his cheek resting against your back and you don't care about his tears staining your shirt as he suddenly cries openly and possibly for the first time since he was a mere child.

He's unsure, overwhelmed, because you're so warm, you smell so nice, you're so soft, and he can't let go, doesn't want to let go. He whines out as you turn a bit as he thinks you're moving away but you're simply placing your legs over his as you sit in his lap, hugging him back as you make sure to give him a gentle squeeze.

He calms down after a long while of simply existing. Of breathing you in, of feeling you. "You're right." He whispers into your neck, and you can't help but shiver, leaning into his hug.

"It doesn't hurt at all."

"You know, I get why you come up here." You comment, as Jungkook makes sure to hold your hand tightly in his, your feet dangling off the edge of the building you're sitting on top of. "It's nice." You say.

He's not listening that well though.

All he can really do is watch your face, illuminated by the neon lights of the city, hair swaying in the wind as you look down below. He doesn't quite know what you two really are, doesn't know how long it will take him to really come out of his shell and give you the love you deserve, but he's trying. He's fighting, he's left his cowardly self behind.

He want's to change.

And not just for you alone, because while he hates seeing you hurt, he knows what you two are doing- what all of you are doing- is for the greater good.

Jungkook hates your ideas sometimes.

Simply because he knows they will work, but also end up with you getting into danger at the end of it. And just like now, all he can do really is hope that you make it out as he keeps a watchful eye on your movements from above, giving you directions via Kana as you sometimes trip and stumble a little.

You're not a very active person; running wasn't really your thing.

Fuck, you were basically a hermit, the most you walked around was from your bedroom into the kitchen!

But then again, sacrifices had to be made somewhere. And Jungkook really admired you; because every time he thought that you had reached your limit, you would face it head first and break through it.

"Ace, try and somehow get to higher ground. They're caging you in from all sides." He urgently tells you as he watches police chase you down the roads, pushing citizens aside to not loose sight of you.

The plan had been simple. Gain all the attention so Taehyung could infect one of the police station's servers with a new worm, giving you all a better and easier access to any data and communication of the area. Jungkook couldn't play the bate well enough; and you had been on their radar already, making you the best option to gain their interest quickly enough.

Although Jungkook hated that part.

"Come on, ah fuck it." He grits out, jumping down to grab a ladder, making his way to a nearby area he could pull you up. There was no way you could reach any of the fire ladders yourself, and by now, things were getting too hot for him to risk anything. "Here!" He barks out, not thinking twice about grabbing your hand and helping you upwards, trying not to worry too much about your heavy breathing. And then there's it.

A pop, loud, followed by another, and another, and another. You're suddenly falling, scraping your knees on the ground below as he can't catch you, too startled by the fact that they had actually decided to shoot to react quick enough. "Fuck!" He says, eyes wide and pupils blown as he looks at you.

"Jungkook, why the fuck aren't you running?!" You yell at him, a scratch on the top of your left cheek as you push his leg away from you- the only thing you can reach. "Go!" You bark again, and he growls out something, before he manages to pull you onto his back, adrenaline not letting his brain process what he's doing.

He can't just leave you.

"Taehyung, get out, Ace has been shot. Whatever was uploaded has to be enough." He says via the in-ear piece, doesn't wait for a response. He still gets it.

"Fuck, what?! Okay okay, I'm out" He says, and Jungkook can only catch a glimpse of the older man leaving the building via the backside entrance. He's only concerned with getting you somewhere safe.

"Urgh." You groan, slowly sitting up on Jungkooks couch. "I mean, I know paintball hurts, but rubber bullets? Jesus.." You complain, while Jungkook looks at you with a dark expression. "What?" You ask him, and he huffs.

"You sound like you haven't almost been killed yesterday." He grimly says, and you shrug. "Stop. I'm serious." He tells you, and you let yourself fall back down onto his couch.

"Whatever. At least we killed their communication." You say, closing your eyes. "Must've at least pissed them off." You say.

"Kana." Jungkook suddenly says, waiting for the familiar sound to tell him she's active. "Shut down for now." He says, and you sit up, hissing instantly at the sudden movement.

"Hey- ah fuck!" You say, as you watch on your bracelet how Kana complies; shutting down. "Why would you do that?" You say in an offended matter, before you grow quiet, watching him go onto his knees in front of you, as he lets his head rest on top of your lap.

"I just want.. you to myself. Just.." He mumbles, and you slowly bring your hand to his hair. "Just for a moment." He says, and you sigh. Jungkook had been under a lot of stress recently, you no doubt being the main cause of most of it recently. So you simply let him be, as he closed his eyes. "Y/N?" He asks suddenly, and you answer him. "I love you." He says, and your body stops moving.

What?

"It's okay if you don't." He says, not moving from his spot, and neither opening his eyes. "I mean it. I only want you to know." He explains further. "Because I.. couldn't fucking live with myself if something happened to you, and I've never told you." He admits, and you can't help but stare at him. Jungkook looked down on himself so much that it was sometimes frustrating to see; simply because you saw him as such an amazing human being with countless talents and beautiful flaws.

You knew you couldn't muster up the strength to actually answer him; not so spontaneously. You weren't that expressive, you couldn't communicate as freely and colorful as he could. All your words seemed black and white to you, mixing into grey and mundane sentences while his words seemed to bloom into the most amazing paintings. He had a way of charming those around him- and he didn't even know.

You slowly leaned down instead, moving his hair to the side as you placed a feather-light kiss to the top of his cheek, close to his eye.

You hoped he would somehow understand you.

And as he moved again, looking at you with eyes that sparkled brighter than any city's skyline ever could, you knew he did.

He'd always understand you, no matter how you communicated with him.

You didn't need words to understand each other.

The shy kiss you two shared, bathed in the purple glow of the neon lights outside his window, spoke enough.

"You should try and sleep." Jungkook tells you, taking away your can of soda as you whine at him. "No buts. Come on, I'll finish this for you." He says, and you let him take over the keyboard of your laptop. It's something you really only let him get away with- anyone else would've probably lost a finger or two trying to touch your work.

You don't trust anyone but him at this point.

"I know that Kana snitched." You comment, as you lean your back against his shoulder. He chuckles. "Can't believe my own creation goes behind my back like that." You mumble, and Jungkook has a light tune to his voice as he speaks.

"Well, it's a good thing though." He tells you. "I worry about you." He says.

"Ugh come on, you know that's not the part I meant." You laugh, and he grins.

"Oh, you mean the part where you listen to my crappy ass singing to help you sleep?" He tells you with a teasing undertone. "No wonder you got insomnia trying to find rest to that." He chuckles, and you playfully hit his thigh.

"Shut up, your voice is nice." You say, and he's glad your eyes are closed, and you can't see him blush.

Somehow, moments like these re-energized him again. Because it proved to him that there was still a piece of that innocent and untainted you inside that thick shell you had put up to protect yourself. And considering that you let him see you like that made his pride grow taller than any of the skyscrapers of his city.

Maybe one day the two of you will have a future together that won't be so difficult and unfair like your current one was. Maybe one day, you both will have changed enough to teach the next generation about what you've overcome.

But then again; living in the moment seemed to fit a lot better in his eyes, as he watched you sleep soundly against his shoulder.

Yeah, this moment was more than enough for now.

The world won't change over night- you both know that. All of you know that. But small things were starting to make a difference here and there; for example, the letter you held towards Jungkook as his eyes widened.

"..and we have officially decided that we no longer want to participate in the case against the defendant. The result of this agreement is that all charges against Y/N L/N have been dismissed and are no longer being investigated." He reads out loud, almost whispering as if saying it too loud could make it a lie. "They let you go?" He asks, and you nod, the small bandaid on your cheek making you look even cuter in his eyes as you shrug.

"Jimin had reached out too. They've let him go home as well." You say. and Jungkook huffs out in disbelief.

After infecting the police station with the worm you had all worked on, you had scared the entire country enough to take a step back from the overall aggressive tone. It wasn't much- but it meant that they knew you were there. You existed, and you were not bowing down.

You were still untamed.

Jungkook smiled brightly as he put the letter down to the side, reaching out to you to pull you onto his lap. He simply holds you for a moment, his lips kissing the skin of your shoulder as if in a trance. "I love you." He tells you, and you smile, squeezing him a bit in your arms. "I really do." He assures you, and you nod.

You don't answer him, and he doesn't seem to mind as he leans back from you, his eyes crinkling at the edges as he grins, hands holding your face so delicately as he places a kiss onto your lips, making you close your eyes as he breaks away from you, letting you rest your head against his shoulder.

He's still not letting anyone very physically close other than you; he's still scared of going out and around like everyone else. You're still rather hiding inside his apartment- both of your apartment now- and you still have trouble sleeping.

But Jungkook keeps the nightmares away.

And you make him brave in exchange.

It's really weird to hear the sound of a radio nowadays.

Things are still far from normal- but recently, citizens had been given radios to listen to public broadcast again. It only played crappy music with some rare good tracks here and there, but it was better than nothing.

Jungkook couldn't help but think that your breathless voice was far more entertaining than any music station he can remember from his youth.

While he hates touching other people, even friends and family, he can't help but feel a rush whenever he touches you.

His hands can't stop on one specific spot, can't seem to stay still even for a moment as his lips nip and suck at the flesh of your neck and shoulder, marking what's his, visualizing that you really belong to him. He bears the same mark on his collarbone from last night, and he should have been satisfied, but even an early morning couldn't keep him away from you.

The rain hit the window harshly, but he didn't notice at all. All his eyes could see was your form underneath him, skin glowing as he moves above you, euphoria filling his veins as he can't look away from where you're connected, where his cock disappears inside of you over and over and over again.

"I love you." He breathes out as he comes undone, holding you close, resting his head against your shoulder, as you hold onto his arms, a smile, a genuine and big smile thrown his way as he can't help but smile along.

"I love you too, Jungkook." You say, and he chuckles.

The radio in the background still playing, as you lay in each others' arms.

(c)Bonny-Kookoo. Please stop reposting my content on AO3 thinking I won't find it. I'm literally everywhere you clowns.

To everyone else: Thank you for reading this mess- I really apologize for the messy storyline, but I just wanted to put this out before the entire thing escaped me again and I would end up struggling to find my way back into it (cough cough flashback to mean lmao). I promise to somewhat post more regularly. Thank you for your kind words and for sticking with me!