#but its awful to think that it all goes back to one guy who didnt train his dogs and just expected ours to be calm all through all that

[justhereforsubsevika]

Part 2 to asshole sevika because one (1) person eluded to maybe wanting a part 2

Nsfw, smut, public, rough fingering, strap sex (referred to as dick and cock), choking, degradation, humiliation, asshole sevi is acc just awkward weird sevi, also this is now a university au do with that what you will

Okay look i cant have my baby be evil for too long ok </3 no tears or angst but like ITS NOT HER FAULTT SHE'S JUST A WEIRDO!!

Okay so you may have fucked up. You may or may not have told a friend, who may have told a friend, who may have told the whole campus that Sevika moans her own name when she cums. You may or may not have exaggerated and said that her shouting lasted for 3 minutes. You may or may not be watching as some evil cunt walks up to her while she sits alone at the picnic bench, snickering.

You can hear their conversation despite the fact you're a good distance away.

"Hey, Sevika right?" This scrawny guy who, quite frankly, Sevika could snap like a twig, starts to say. Her face lights up. She thinks she's about to make a friend, you can see it all over her face. Jesus Christ, you feel awful. It feels like someone is wringing all the blood out of your guts as you watch this scene unfold.

"Mhm! That's me!" She says, turning off her phone and gesturing beside her to request that he takes a seat. "Nah, I'm good." He starts laughing at her and her face drops in confusion. "What's funny?" She queries, standing so she looks down at him. He doesn't even step back despite the fact his entire body is now shrouded in her shadow. "Is it true you- HAH FUCK- you moan your own name? Y'know when you finish?" He splutters between maniacal laughter.

Her face goes white.

She looks to you with so much betrayal on her face. But she deserved it right? She fucked you raw and didnt even chuck a towel at you after. She made fun of your boyfriend (who you cheated on, but that's irrelevant) and your sexuality.

Oh shit.

She's walking straight to you.

Her face sure got its colour back quick.

"Hi Sev- AH-" Suddenly you're being tugged by your hair across the campus, screaming and flailing as she grunts and tells you to shut up. She doesn't even bother to go into a bathroom stall once you're inside the library building, just pins you against the bathroom tile with her forearm and shoves her fingers under your skirt. She pushes into you roughly, not caring that it hurts bad since there's no moisture to assist her. She wants to hurt you. You've pissed her off bad.

"WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU TELL PEOPLE THAT?" She shouts, roughly pounding into you. It's all so much, her fiery, furious expression, her rough fingers deep inside you so abruptly. But it's not fair! She fucks loads of girls, why the hell is she assuming you spread the rumour?

"H-how do you know it was me? Could be one of your s-sluts that you fuck-"

"BECAUSE I ONLY EVER DID THAT WITH YOU! BECAUSE YOU'RE MY FUCKING FRIEND AND I TRUSTED YOU!"

She looks for a second like she might cry, but instead grunts and bars her teeth, hand coming up to choke you. Even with her impenetrable anger, you can tell she's at least not trying to kill you. You give her the satisfaction of spluttering and heaving for air even though you can breathe perfectly fine and she moans. "You're such a fucking whore aren't you? Gave that pussy up to me despite your little boyfriend, now you're slutting yourself out for me? Anyone could walk in and see how you're dripping down your thighs. Pathetic little bitch."

She lets you go for a second to unbuckle her jeans and of course she's packing. Typical Sevika, always prepared for revenge sex.

She comes up behind you as you attempt to pull down your panties and grabs you up, her forearm able to restrain both your legs from under your knees.

Holy shit. You're now fully off the ground, watching in the bathroom mirror as Sevika slides her dark purple strap into your pussy. Her other hand is back round your neck, making your eyes roll back. She bobs you up and down on her cock in a way you're sure should be physically impossible, somehow still managing to ruin your pussy with her brutal pace. She starts thrusting up into you and you laugh thinking about how she must look from behind, rocking up and down on her toes.

"Fuck are you laughing at?" She sneers, squeezing a little at your neck. Your mouth drops open, silenced by Sevika's rough grip. Her hand drops to thumb at your clit and you can't help but cry out.

"Mm, oh shit sevi, mm fuck sevika," you groan and she smirks.

"Who's moaning my name now?"

And then Sevika sees the bat symbol and says "my city needs me" and flies into an aeroplane and dies (IM NOT WRITING THIS DUMB SHIT ANYMORE OKAY I DECIDED I HATE IT)

[flo-zoinks]

Plzplzplz i love ur headcannons sm!! Could u do some if they found a small cat wander into camp ??

Aw ty!!!!! (This is the first normal hc req I've had LMAO 💀)

HOW EACH RDR2 GANG MEMBER REACTS TO A CAT IN CAMP (MY OPINION)

Arthur - quite indifferent to it, probably jokes at least someone else'll be bringing in meat they hunt to camp, much to Dutch's distaste. He sketches it a couple times however

John - doesn't like cats too much, but grows a little close to it by them both sitting in silence in chapter 2 whilst John was still recovering

Javier - wants to keep the cat, often strokes kitty but isnt a huge cat fan, although perhaps he plays guitar whilst the cat listens. Calls it gordito

Pearson - rambles on sight that sailors and navy boys believe cats are good luck to anyone who hears as an excuse to bring up being in the navy. Offhandedly will feed it chunks that can't go into the main stew for whatever reason later on- (Arthur hates that)

Uncle - ignores the cat mostly but they are often found in the future lazing around together in camp. The people in camp say it's Uncle's protege

Bill - Worried on how Cain would interact with the kitty but if all goes well and they keep the cat he likes to keep the 2 animals together, insisting Cain could use some other friends

Hosea - Wants to keep the cat as long as its self reliant (eg hunts for itself), saying it'll boost a camp morale to have a pet. Reads the newspaper whilst it sits on the table together.

Dutch - immediately uses it as reason to have another speech praising cats for not following society's clutch and doing as they please with no care. Calls it Ruth (Ruthie by most)

Mary-Beth - falls in love with the cat, likes to write with them curled up on her lap and brushes it with a special hairbrush she (stole) got. Once also (stole) got a cute pendant and put it on the cat as a collar - though had to take it off knowing it would get stolen and put the kitty in danger

Tilly - also wants to keep it, and rants to the cat about Miss Grimshaw whilst the kitty listens. Probably a little protective of it and wants the cat to be a pet for the girls and keeps it away from select guys

Karen - "aw that's cute". Doesn't really care past that but perhaps makes a sarcastic comment to the cat every once in a while talking shit about someone

Grimshaw - at first didnt want an unhygienic animal here, but quickly grew to love it as a mini helper in removing vermin and mouse. Often is seen walking around camp with the kitty and tells camp members to take notes as it's a lot more clean then half the gang

Abigail - strokes the kitty and likes the cat, though is also quite indifferent to it. However shes one of the first to look for it if it goes missing for Jack's sake

Jack - ADORES THE CAT. Cried a little to Abigail saying he felt guilty for liking a cat which is a dogs enemy, therefore Cain's. But now often they play together and when he has naps the cat curls up close next to him

Trelawny - REALLY likes cats, surprisingly. Ensures Micah isn't near to the kitty and uses it as an assistant for his magic tricks. Says every wizard needs his cat. Probably when disappearing will reappear more often to check up on the cat

Strauss - a little avoiding to it at first thinking it's quite dirty, yet as he spends so much time in camp the cat grows to be his little helper whilst he does work, sitting in silence next to him. The only time Strauss ever shared his wealth was buying the cat a little bed next to his desk, partly to avoid it from sitting on his papers again.

Sean - quite superstitious on cats, so if it came around Christmas time hes very happy to see the cat. Believes it's good luck, but watches it closely in case it let's a mouse escape or purrs with it's back to the fire. Teaches all this to Jack, and likes to pat the cat periodically.

Lenny - doesn't care much for the cat, but if everyone else likes it then he supposes it's a good thing to have in camp. Worries to Hosea on having a cat whilst they move often the cat would struggle to adapt, but Hosea says not to worry as the cat is a lot smarter then half of camp, (he names Bill), and they manage.

Molly - also incredibly superstitious about cats, and at first doesn't want them to keep it saying its unhygienic. After time shes seen with the cat on her lap as she complains about her life to it brushing the kitty. However she says it's only to stop it being messy on her things. Insists it's a she and calls her Princess

Sadie - could not care less about the cat, probably ignores it if it comes close without realising

Charles - likes cats, pats the kitty often and gives it spare food he has. However he can't stand how the cat plays with live food, and had to put some animals out of its misery when the cat got bored with them, much to his disdain

Kieran - doesn't say anything but REALLY wants them to keep it. At first he's a little nervous around the cat but instantly warms up to it soon after and tries to spend all his time with the cat. Tries to get the cat and horses to bond

Micah - "Do we NEED another mangy lazy animal we've already got Swanson" really doesn't want a cat in camp, probably kicked it once without realising but didn't care much. Calls them weak animals for being always 'sneaky' rather than fighting everything head on on

Thanks for asking me!!!❤ what do you think?? HAVE A NICE DAY I LOVED THIS ASK XX

[thewertsearch]

Anonymous asked: youve finally gotten to the section of the comic that makes me tear up everytime i read it! vriska is such a polarizing character but i have nothing but empathy for her. i do think she cares about her friends, even if shes awful at showing it and her attempts do more harm than good. Specifically i DO think she cares about karkat- she shows a begrudging respect for him throughout the comic and even says he maybe is the most human of them, which is something she is starting to admire herself even if she wont admit it. I think if vriska didnt care about the others in her sad, warped-by-child-abuse way, things would be much different. Jack bringing the bodies back and her being visibly enraged by it- i think thats grief. more than that i just find her quest to kill jack so sad. It really reveals to me how fucked up she is- she repeats so many times that she knows survival is unlikely, that she knows her immortality wont save her, but that its something she needs to do anyways. Vriska isnt actively suicidal- but shes passively okay with dying if its in a way where she can accomplish her goals. She wanted to be absolved of all the bad things shed done (even if thats not how it works). And- just as much- she wanted to save her friends. and terezi. The person who wants to not be a killer anymore but goes down the path anyway because the timeline says she must, because her own lack of a future is breathing down her neck. Who was the person vriska cares about most on that meteor, even if she is horrible at showing it. Terezi is the one to kill her. They were best friends! They were both thirteen years old! And its narrated by the man who literally groomed vriska and who she views as being a predator to her!!!! Most heartbreaking death she couldve gotten. Fly high in those dream bubbles queen

Maybe I spoke too soon, when I asserted that Vriska probably didn't give a shit about Karkat. They might not have had many on-panel interactions, but they were co-players for over six hundred hours. We can't say definitively that they didn't bond at all.

I guess the issue here is that the trolls' social group consists of sixty-six unique relationships, and we simply don't have time to explore them all. We know that each troll isn't necessarily buddies with every other troll in the group, and I could list plenty of pairs that almost certainly aren't friends. I can't imagine that Nepeta was particularly pally with Eridan, for example, and I don't think Aradia and Gamzee were hanging out offscreen.

All that said - if any troll is friends with the entire group, it's probably Karkat. His only real conversation with Vriska was that argument about quadrants on LOPAH, but there was a moment in one of the walkarounds where she agreed to put her plans on hold for his sake, which was a surprisingly kind gesture for her. Plus, you're right, she does think he'd cut it better as a human - and that statement hits differently when you remember she's low-key jealous of humanity.

As for Scratch... yeah, his treatment of Vriska, specifically, is nothing short of disturbing. She clearly hated it whenever he showed up to text her...

...and, uh, now that I'm actually thinking about it, the guy only ever seems to manipulate girls. The only male Player he's even spoken to was Karkat, and that was only three sentences. This guy was born from a nightmare - and he certainly acts like it, the creep.

[urautismdiagnosis]

Please give me your headcanons/ideas on Ranger Marsh, and my life is yours🙏 (He's my favorite old man yeehaw squeeeeeee)

YEAH HE IS

Ranger marsh is THE FATHER OF ALL TIME to me because listen-

I live in Florida. Whenever they talk about manatees or red tide or the effects of a cold snap im like YOOO I KNOW ABOUT THAT!!!

I need yall to understand 🙏 hes part of the fcking ecosystem.

He understands the needs and behaviours and everything about the everglades and its creatures. He knows how to talk to them and they know him and love him. He chooses to go out and help right away with this " I gotcha dont worry about nothing!" attitude

Hes so connected with it and its beautiful-

Its just that sense of community hes got with all the creatures in the everglades that makes me 🥺 hes got such a kind heart and he seems like the person to choose to do something because someone has to yk?

Alot of people would be offput by all the bugs and heat and etc, but he just goes oh well and keeps going along and I think that is SO special

And im gonna be honest here. Alot of people ARENT. Like at all, and they do the dumbest sht

One time my dad and I were on a board walk near a river that had gators in it and there were signs about it too. We saw this??? Fcking guy in a whole business suit with his kid wanting to give a little gator fcking store bought chicken nuggets??? ��🙏 we like kindly explain uhhh heyyy don't do that cuz u don't want gators to associate humans with food or (gestures broadly to all the many reasons u shouldn't feed wild animals)

And then we continued our walk, but when we turned back we fcking saw a mini crowd (with several small kids leaning THROUGH THE GAP in the railing) surrounding a guy with a kiddie fishing pole trying to??? Idk feed the gator the chicken nuggets.

There were signs about not disturbing the wildlife.

I didnt exaggerate a single aspect of this btw.

Like thank fck gators are ambush predators and not chasers cuz those guys can run and climb like nobody's business... and hide under cars

SIDE TANGEANT ASIDE alot of people just aren't in tune with and have like a totally unrealistic and detached from reality expectation of that kinda nature. But ranger marsh (i headcanon that his first name is Rover btw cuz not only is that a flooding guy name but cmon- RIVER MARSH?!!) Is always so patient about explaining that kind of stuff to the others in the show

Hes got an understanding and a system on how to handle things.

Also I do appreciate how he struggles with understanding technology and prefers old fashioned ways. Because while there are alot of folks like that, alot of people can be... very aggressive about it if u disagree with them :(

But ranger marsh, while he can't understand, he still does come around and appreciates it the best he can yk? Like sure he doesn't get WHY and he sucks at it, but he comes around and appreciates it, even if it isn't always for him

The awe he felt when the gup k went under water and he saw the world he loves from an entirely new angle? Oh my god my heart-

He would absolutely take in any stray creature that needs help, he feels like the kinda guy that would've tried to help a wild animal heal up in the garage when they were a kid and everyone else told him not to touch it 🥺

Also personal headcanon time:

I dont think this guy could keep a secret for the life of him. Like this guy doesn't even realize, he feels like the guy would would see something weird and then go " well ill be i never did see anythin as strange as that before" to a fcking bush or the sky

He sort just has this factual way of speaking that reminds me of people who go "well yeah well when ya go n talk her dont mention x and x cuz I'm pretty sure she's suspecting her boyfrens been cheatin on her and oh I wasn't supposed to share that was i."

Also I feel like maybe I'm just projecting and making him autistic but like??? Has a hard time dealing with change??? Likes being in the wild with a bunch of creatures??? Probably needs his "two hours of contemplating on the back porch" every day ????

Hes absolutely the type to want to dig in the mud for hours thank you, he absolutely went fck living a normal life in society I want to be friends with the animals under my porch

I desperately want him to basically go "hm ok ur staying here for tonight" to calico jack who is the equivalent of a (very kind and gentle) feral stray 🙏

I'm gonna make a post about their dynamic later lol

Cuz likes its an old funky pirate cat with isolation issues thats probably scared of gators and Caimens for I lost me leg reasons and hasn't had like a normal meal in probably over a decade at least

(Cj probably can't handle dairy but he's gonna try (and fail) ranger marsh probably makes delicious mac n cheese)

also cj literally uses a peg leg that can NOT be good for his back, like there's so much special care needed if u have a proper prosthetic but a peg leg is like 💀🙏 so bad

I feel like CJ is this very kind and gentle soul, but the second he meets someone his age (cuz they ARE around the same age) he just becomes a wet gremlin, ill yap more about it on their dynamic post tho

As for the question of "ayyo whats up with ranger marshes wife or rather tweaks mom what's up with that"

I dont think tweaks mom died or anything, I think they just divorced when she was in like middle school and then he got her legos to try to help her feel better 😭

probably just cuz of personal differences... but yk some people can get kinda :| during divorces and stuff

I feel like they were probably high school sweethearts that got married before they even grew as people

It seems to me like tweak was probably homeschooling and definitely was skipping grades and whatever

I liek to think she has lego models of all her gups and that she had an emo phase in middle school 🙏 she still has the spirit in her soul but let's be real she's probably too busy elbows deep in an engine to upkeep that stuff anymore lol

(Ik we saw a younger tweak before in the show but like who says it wasn't at a different point in her life lol)

I dont think she was necessarily into emo specifically as a way to rebel her own parents btw (at least not her dad) but just because she liked the culture lol and was probably on my space as a teen

She 100% tried to take her dad to a monster truck show at least once and he absolutely did not understand the hype 😭 but tweak was inspired to take inspiration from the mix of animal designs and unique shapes into something more eco friendly and versatile tho

Like the gup k is just a wetland monster truck 🙏

She absolutely had years of trial and error with all sorts of gizmos that exploded at least a few times before she got the hang of engineering

Probably tried to make all sorts of things to help the little critters her pa took care of

Might be part of the reason he doesn't understand tech that well because when ur a kid without alot of money u gotta work with what u have and sometimes that doesn't always work out XD but hey restriction of choices can lead to alot of unique and creative solutions!

idk the exact reason why ranger marsh and his wife would've divorced,maybe it was just a difference in how they envisioned their life styles and the fact ranger marsh seems a bit too "introverted and quiet" for a more social life and environment with a normal job tbh

(Cough autism cough they are both autistic in different ways cough)

but the everglades have always been tweaks home and I doubt she wanted to leave. I think she still talks to her mom and stuff but just... not that much

I dont really think ranger marsh would've tried again in that type of relationship, hes too busy being busy with life and enjoying the small moments

And hot cocoa from the machine that tweak gave him as a gift

He absolutely helped her keep her room organized and tidy as a kid tho, but look at her room into he octopod now XD

Also SOMEONE MAKE HIM SAY " BLESS THEIR HEART" PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE THATS THE NUMBER ONE SOUTHERN SAYING-

Like 🥺 idk if yall know but bless ur heart can mean alot of different stuff depending on the context- it can go from "oh my goodness thats awful I can empathize with that and I wish them the best" to "well.... that person has no FCKING idea what they're doing but.... bless that idiots heart hes trying😂 🙏"

[posebean]

fantasys your alkaloid‼️ ‼️ ‼️ ‼️ ‼️ ‼️ ‼️  ref sheet of alkaloid for my alkakurei fantasy au that i totally didnt abandon crazy:B here (notes abt world+magic system and other stuff on that post)

stuff abt their outfits and etc under read more

hiiro is fresh from his village baby boy left to go find his nii-san with only his clothes and a trusty satchel at his side- he just goes around looking for his nii-san and etcetc idk how long the gap is but he finds tatsumi and mayo and stays with them for some time and during that time tatsun gets him a coat because baby boy literally only has those and hes just been doing work for some guild (idk how to explain bc guilds require education but i guess tatsun pulled strings for him) so he has money to live while also looking for his nii-san and sometimes he has to go to cold places and one time he comes home after a job in a cold place and hes sick and tatsun is like hiiro-san please take this jacket with you :..) so now hiiro has a coat custom-made for him :3! he's good with elemental magic (the 5 core elements water wind fire earth plant) very versatile and a skilled little guy (not as talented as his nii-san but no one is as talented as nii-san!) anyways yadda yadda he gets a message or smth and is preparing to leave tatsun and mayo but (spoilers for meru fic) meru points him towards the town where everyone else is and yea he goes and finds his nii-san and now his goal has changed from find nii-san to convince nii-san to go back home but he befriends everyone else too and i think they do eventually go on some kind of adventure together maybe more the three younger ppl aira hiiro and kohaku

aira is a little silly fellow he dresses nicely (very inspired by fs2 but i cant stop looking at it and thinking damn he french colored......) and loves magic so much he admires all the grand mages and everyone in the upper echelons and loves watching other people cast spells and such unfortunately for him while he has a decently high innate talent, his control is God Awful which results in magic never going well for him- with no control at all, literally negative control, he can try to cast one spell and something completely different will be cast instead- and the skill level varies too it's literally just a roll of a dice for him if he tries to cast a simple flame spell he might end up flooding the room with a wall of water, it's that bad kkshfkj also he acts like he doesn't like it but he actually loves rabuhan-junior so much he secretly spoils the hamster named after him and rabuhan junior loves him back rabuhan-junior likes to sleep in his hat or on aira's head whenever kohaku goes out and leaves rabu-han junior with aira tatsun has very normal clothes bro dresses like a dad (did you know both of his fs have the same color palettes i didnt but using them as reference made me realize, anyways-) his clothes are very comfortable and easy to move around in, especially given his injury from [spoiler event here ]. he also has a cane and his injured leg has pain suppressor sigils and bandages wrapped all over it his leg isn't completely unusable like its not broken or anything its more like. a kind of necrosis like if you unwrapped it there would be a dark mark thats like icky and sometimes it flares up and hurts tatsun so much that he falls over and :( he found the cane one day in the catacomb (wonder who put it there) he added the begonia himself as a reminder of his sin... shiro is his little mouse familiar that he conjured with the help of kaname! she's a sweet little thing, often found sleeping on an open book on tatsumi's desk. she has the tatsumi-colored ears and legs because she was conjured up rather than a pact familiar. regarding magic tatsun is pretty average on both control and power, but that doesnt really matter because most of the spells he uses are passive spells more used for healing/doing work. he likes to garden and has a beautiful garden of all kinds of flowers at the chapel :) he just doesn't dare touch the flowers in the catacomb, because he knows someone else already takes care of those also that purple gem hanging around his neck is a gift from mayomayo it doesn't do anything and has no magic but tatsun still likes it :) mayomayo dresses in all dark colors because he believes that if he always dresses in dark colors no one will ever have to be bothered by seeing his existence he comes from a lineage that practices forbidden magic, not necessarily all dark but some of the more ... interesting spells . something happens in his past and he ends up leaving, taking with him his tome and well. proceeding to get chased by all kinds of monsters out in the wild because for some reason he just attracts all kinds of beasts poor guy magic-wise he does have the forbidden magic from his family but he more specializes in healing and curse removal- he doesn't dare do anything else for fear of (redacted). besides, maybe he'll one day be able to actually save somebody instead of hurting them, maybe his existence would be worth it some day. the ribbon in his hair (the green/teal one) is from tatsun :) he said mayo would look good in brighter colors and mayo disagreed so tatsun gave it to him and now its become part of his outfit and (i combust into a thousand bits ) also because of that mayo feels like he has to give tatsun something back so thats why he gives tatsumi a purple gem he had that used to hang from his spell tome anyways i still love this au very much and i hope you enjoyed now i will proceed to forget about it again /j i still really wanna write kohaku's fic and then maybe one last one for rinne-kun or smth because aghghj there's still so much that's not developed yet but (explodes)

[oceanwithouthermoon]

Talking about Saiki and SA here a bit, btw, just a warning~

Thinking about how you said Saiki was a victim of SA and you’re literally so right. I feel like people sometimes just blow right past the fact that Kusuke is like that with his brother, but I think it can add a lot to interpretations of his character. But even if it only goes as far as what is shown in canon — which I almost doubt — it still remains the fact that Kusuke is doing all of that knowing fully well that his brother can hear him. It’s literally sexual harassment.

People point it out more often with Teruhashi and her brother (back to the reasons you said, people think it’s more serious if it happens to women). But the things he does, that’s all sexual harassment. And yet when Kusuke does similar things, it’s often brushed aside. Just,,, a bit crazy to me.

(And that’s not even mentioning when people completely disregard this part of Teruhashi’s story and act like she’s one-dimensional,,, but that’s another story)

But all this to say you’re literally so right. Anyways love you mwah =^•w•^=

THANK YOU SO MUCH. I NEEDD PEOPLE TO ACKNOWLEDGE THIS MORE.

(heed the sa warning + abuse and incest warning before opening, i talk a LOT here.. im mostly just reiterating what happens directly in the manga though.. ALSO EXTREMELY LONG POST WARNING..)

I always viewed kokomi and makoto + kusuo and kusuke as like.. paralleling each other ? not sure if thats the right word, but IMMEDIATELY when i saw both of these dynamics i made the connection.. i guess since it was so clear to me, i assumed that it was so obvious and on purpose that everyone else knew too, but so many people just.. ignore it..

i think most people that read/watch saiki k have recognized the fact that most main characters are meant to parallel or relate to saiki in at least some way, (if anyone who doesnt know what im talking about is reading this, im sure at least someone on here has done a better breakdown on that, i just.. dont know where to find that..) but this particular connection is one i dont see often and i genuinely believe that its almost entirely because of the whole "sexual assault/harassment isnt as serious when it happens to men as when it happens to women" thing.. most of the fandom acknowledge that what makoto does is awful and kokomi is a victim, so why is it different when its kusuke and kusuo ??

its EXACTLY the same.. what we see on screen with the saikis is WORSE, actually.. and what WE see from these two relationships isnt the full extent of what the two victims experience off screen, and i strongly believe that its heavily implied that both kokomi and kusuo have been through much worse with their brothers than whats shown..

we have no idea what kusuke couldve done BEFORE moving away and creating the telepathy canceler (and dont say that he couldnt have done anything cuz they were kids, cocsa [child on child sa] is still a thing and still valid, ESPECIALLY since they were both kid geniuses and kusuke definitely KNEW better.. but yea, kusuo implies that hes been like that for a long time, way before we ever saw them, sooo..) and its highly likely that whatever happened that we didnt see, before or after the move, was WORSE than what he does ON screen (i honestly dont want to think about what a guy with an incestual obsession with his brother does with cameras everywhere in his brothers home..) and what we see him do is already insane..

literally using his brother to get off, manipulating him and forcing him to play the games that give him sexual pleasure.. actually, speaking of, ive seen some people say that what kusuke does isnt really incest because the only reason he uses kusuo is because hes a masochist and kusuo is the only person that can overpower him.. this is a total misfire LOL, his upbringing alongside kusuo and his relationship with him is the REASON that hes a masochist, the ENTIRE REASON why thats what he gets off to.. its not just CONVENIENT that kusuo is there to get him off, he SPECIFICALLY seeks kusuo out and forces him to do things that give him sexual pleasure.. he believes that kusuo is the only person in the world that can ever give him sexual pleasure, what about that doesnt sound incestuous?

and one of the worst parts of it is, kusuo BARELY acknowledges how weird it is.. in fact, he's COMPLACENT in a lot of the games, obedient even, being bribed into them the same way he does with simple things like bringing kuniharu to work.. this is the biggest reason why i believe the off-screen stuff is probably worse, because kusuo is obviously conditioned to think that letting your brother get off to you is just.. fine.. we hardly see him try to get away from this situation beyond simply calling him gross.. theres one moment during the cat tank situation where kusuke tries to get him to grab the limiter off of his crotch specifically so that he can see him in that position and kusuo looks terrified and cant do it, BUT its unclear whether the expression of fear was entirely his concentration because he didnt wanna break the limiter or because he didnt want to let his brother get off to that, and i think its mostly the former ? idk, i dont remember this part that well but im preeeetty sure..

he does acknowledge that MAKOTOS behavior is bad when he sees it, but he never thinks its a big enough deal that he needs to help her or anything, (except for maybe the okinawa situation) which i know is probably just for the sake of not letting the gag manga get too serious, BUT it can also be explained pretty easily by this whole thing.. the way kokomi is treated is literally the same way kusuo lives his life, even down to their incestuous brother being possessive to the point of berating their potential love interests.. (which in this case happened to be each other, kusuo and kokomi..)

so yeah, kusuo just. doesnt really know how bad it actually is ? or maybe he does, but doesnt acknowledge it because he doesnt WANT to.. him barely acknowledging it and being complacent is part of why some people dont really get that its sa and incest, but his complacency obviously plays a big part in how its effected him too, like thats purposeful.. like i said, hes been CONDITIONED not to acknowledge it..

to me, it looks like a classic situation in which kusuo doesn't acknowledge his trauma because he knows that if he did, it would change his outlook on his life, his family, and his childhood FOREVER. he would never be willing to tell anyone or ask for help on his own accord, and accepting that there was anything wrong in the first place means, to him, dealing with that issue by himself for the rest of his life.

why would he ever admit that anything was wrong if nothing would change either way? the only thing that WOULD change is HIM, and why would he want that? isnt it better to be blissfully unaware than to knowingly suffer in silence?

plus, he genuinely does love his brother and knows in the back of his mind that kusukes feelings toward him comes from their unhealthy upbringing and relationship and its more complex than just "hes an evil guy blah blah.." because he isnt really evil and kusuo KNOWS that.. actually, he might be the only person in the world who COULD understand..

so yeahhhh.. kokomi and kusuo are both CANONICALLY victims of sexual harassment.. (and incestual abuse at that..) and, by my interpretation, implied victims of sa as well !! (im not really sure where the line can be when it comes to this sometimes, like when your brother sniffs your bedsheets and rubs himself on them or gets off to you right in front of your face or tries to get you to grab something positioned over his crotch so he can see you in.. THAT position.. but i already said that its pretty likely that both brothers have gone farther than that off-screen..)

anywayyyy.. this is so important to me and i wish people would talk and write about it more instead of pretending it never happened and mischaracterizing every one of these characters, especially for the sake of a ship like i was talking about in my other post.. it sucks that people so often just cast kusuos canon issues aside..

[starsoftheeye]

TMAGP Live Reaction - Ep 13

This probably won't be a regular thing since I usually listen to the new episodes on my way home from school, but I wanted to do it today and no-one can stop me

Pre-Episode

Aw this dedication is so nice, reminds me of how I used to sign off on social media when I was younger

Pre-Statement

omg samcelia date samcelia date

they're so cute omg

"she also said that you dont know how cute you are" alice dyer youre not fooling anyone

i wanna hear what this interaction sounded like between alice and celia

"nobody, i'm mysterious" this isnt gonna come back to haunt us im sure

omg samcelia dating reveal already

JACKS HER SON OMG

"wild couple of years after i moved here" does this mean that celias way of coping with being dropped in a different universe was to just fuck... iconic

either that or jack got brought along with her and shes just covering it up. or jack has some mysterious origins that we dont know about

omg a horror protagonists with loving, alive parents wow

i was not expecting sam to be this relatable oh no

sam :(

oh no an "incident"

alice :(

i love celia just being "i know we're on a date and thats great and all but what do you think about the Horrors"

ofc you know theyre real you lived through the apocalypse

ah hello lena and gwen

ah gwen is learning about the consequences of delivering a random address to a living mr blobby knockoff

ooh are we gonna get some exposition

yes we are

these are our Fears i presume

you work in the government responsible for discarding peoples experiences and traumas gwen you werent exactly one of the good guys to begin with

guys i dont think shes gonna sort it

Statement

hold music?? hello?? do we recognise this voice?? needles??

i cannot understand what the name of this company is but i do not like them

the autoresponder sounds so cunty who are they i must know

oooh a scottish guy we love a scottish guy

"i pay your wages" sounding ass. telling the autoresponder that youre the highest investor in a gambling app isnt the flex you think it is dude

i think if a website that directly involves the handling of your money does "weird background checks" and has a "janky interface", staying is less of a feat of loyalty and more a feat of stupidity

oh this guy does nfts for sure

are you allowed to blame the warning you didnt listen to for the consequences?

oh his friends suck too

damn all jokes aside i feel bad for this dude

ohhh so is this like the dice where things can only get so good before they go terribly? or is it like a "when your life gets bad your money goes up" thing

ah its the second option

tbf if its not against the law its not against the law

this guy is the definition of "20 pounds is 20 pounds"

suddenly i dont feel as sorry for this guy

i have a sneaking suspicion that this guy did not get his money

oh nevermind

OOOOOOH NEVERMIND THAT NEVERMIND

huh

HUH

DID THEY SEND A CREATURE TO GET HIM WHAT

Post-Statement

Alice!!

Ooooh he got pished

Alice really out here dissing every kind of date I've ever been on

oh no :(

sam no :(

sam apologise please

shes right tho youre in the wrong place if you don't want weird

alice :(

this is why a polycule would fix everything

alice i love you

sam i love you but you deserved that

[threepoint14art]

HELLOOOO for pride month i wanted to share our headcanons for fnafhs!!!!! coupled with some edits with our designs!!

Under the cut there's individual commentary about all of em!

Freddys afab, and only goes by he/him with the animatronics. He didnt tell them he's male or anything. What happeend was they they were all talking to eachothet, getting to know eachother, when chica realized she forgot to ask his name. Meanwhile freddy had though he heard Fred, so he wss on his own little world and asked to the air ‘Fred?’ so they took that as his name and he hasnt ‘corrected them’. (This is my (loop’s) work around for those twins basicallly having the same name.) Hes called Freddy and not Fred bc Chica gives them all nicknanes , Freddy, Foxy, Goldy, instead of Fred, Fox, and Golden. ( Bonnie… you bastard you already fit…. cannot change his name to Bon without nuking Bons actual name). He hasn't thought about his sexuality because he thinks he's undatable, Dysphoria levels are very high, hes contantly ‘out of it’ in his own body. feels like hes just, piloting it, distant from himself and the now. whenever he does come back doen it feels awful fir a bilion reasons 👍 this makes it hard for him to identify the feelings he has about himself since its all so fuzzy and distant. hes not thinking about his sexuality, he doesn’t think anyone would really date him so, fuck if he knows! Bonnie is cis demironantic and unlabled. Goes by he/him. One of his names is María (Bonnie María) so that plus his longer hair means he gets misgendered as a CIS guy and I think its rlly funny. He's not thinking about romance because "no one would go out with him", enter Bon with a nuke Chica is cis and Bisexual. Goes by She/her. Her bisexual awakening was magnet hatsune miku lmao Fox is afab trans guy, stealth about it, and bisexual. Goes by he/him. He figured out he was trans PRETTY early on so no one but his family really even knows, he practically has no dysphoria. Golden is amab nonbinary and pan (they/them). Being famous is the worst thing ever you could do to them, people know their dead name and sorta treat them as a gay man rather than someone nonbinary and it's really bad!!! Sort of wishes they fell into some binary so something about them would "change" and so that people would realize they have changed, there is no way to "pass" as nonbinary and it drives them a lil crazy Fred has not been born (sorry low blow), but if they were they'd be amab, nonbinary and bisexual. Still figuring stuff out but eventually he will settle for going by He/they Meg is afab, genderfluid and pan, goes by any pronouns, idek what else to say <3 Bon is afab trans guy and gay, goes by he/him. He and Malva (usagi) are twins and just switched names and lives and gender! so he's stealth to everyone EXCEPT his sister, this includes their father! who is awful!! and this makes him super repressed and ill about being gay, yeah. Both he and Malva lied on legal documents to look cis since they exchanged identities and all that joy is amab trans girl and bisexual, goes by she/her, also famous so people also know her deadname </3

Toddy is afab and cis, she's NOT aware of either of her flags, comphet queen, "dating" bon because it helps them both feel so normal but its not working out and it never will! Seeing the nigthmares all date eachother made her think "oh wow not being monogamous is a thing" and if she thinks of malva and joy thats HER BUSINESS and her business only. Also fun fact her parents are divorced not because they hate eachother but because they realized they were both aroace, epic. Goes by she/her Deuz is amab bigender gay and poly, the nightmares are a polycule. She is not that dysphoric most of the time and goes by He/she Maggie is afab trans guy, bi and poly, Femenine trans guys are epic and he is one, gets misgendered a lot because he doesn't bind and wears makeup and croptops and all that. Goes by he/him and she/her ONLY with his partners. Onnie is amab agender, gay and poly, it used to be forced to have really short hair because it's dad is awful (also bon's dad, yay siblings), so when he ran away he grew it out a lot, goes be he/they/it Onyx (oxy) is afab trans guy, bi and poly, he got kicked out when he came out as trans, he's super happy now tho. He/him Pup(pet) afab demi-boy, his legal name is puppilo i know it sounds dumb thats why they go by pup. He's queer in some way but its impossible to find out given how he experiences feelings and all that (lore tm) so, fuck if i know. Goes by he/they Mai afab demi-girl and sapphic, yay for twins, her legal name is marinette but they go by mai only, she really wants to date but due to how she and pup operate thats kinda impossible and shes super hung up on it. Goes by They/she Lily is afab cis aroace!!! Eak is afab trans guy and gay, he does not really pass that well so he's misgendered quite a bit at school. Goes by he/him Tony is amab cis guy and gay, he's dating Eak, he used to question if he was REALLY gay before eak came out and was super confused about it and then he found out hes a guy and all is well lol Cami is afab aromantic bisexual and nonbinary, though she has not thought about the whole nonbinary thing that deeply at all. Eventually she will use all pronouns but currently she goes by She/her Loon is amab bigender bisexual and poly, is super dysphoric and hates dressing too femenine because it "doesn't fit her", "not cute enough to be a girl and not handsome enough to be a guy", goes by loon when masc and jj when fem. Goes by he/she Malva is trans and lesbian! Unlike Bon she's normal about being lesbian, mostly because their dad thinks she "doesn't look like one" and because generally girls just get an easier pass to be mushy and close to eachother (eugh), goes by she/her Owynn is afab trans guy, demiromantic, ace and poly. Damn share some flags dude you are hogging them. Stealth at school but percieved as a femenine guy and therefore called gay (as an insult) a lot, lied in legal documents to be seen as a guy! he's dysphoric despite passing really well because of very minor things people don't really notice, female scorpions are taller than male ones and he's tall, female scorpions have bigger hands than male ones and his hands are big, etc etc. He goes by he/him Background character jumpscare! Mesero who is named Vincent here, Owynn's older brother who is amab cis pan and poly, he thought he was straight for a LONG while and hated people calling him gay as an insult because he had long hair, sorry to burst your bubble but you are not straight, he eventually became normal about it but it did hurt that people were "right about him" Spring!!! Is amab cis unlabeled and poly, he never thought about labels or anything for the longest time because he thought he was undatable and also was busy with ten trillion jobs, fly low, goes by he/him Bg character again! Novia (ghghg) who is named Leticia here! She is afab cis straight and poly!

Also sorry for not having any of the funtimes, we haven't really thought about them aside from lily, so we have nothing ToT. Any funtime lovers please share what you think about them we really need it

[leavingsunsets]

Hi hi! If you're still taking requests, then I'd like to request a drabble, fic, or thoughts and whatnot for a Senku x male S/O scenario in which the Science Crew asks if Senku is dating anybody, and while they expect him to say no and that it's "a waste of time", he shares that he actually is in a relationship with someone who's still out there and petrified! Though, while they're all like "who's the unlucky lady?", he explains that S/O is actually a boy! Alternatively, he could not say anything until they all meet S/O and see that they're a boy! Please and thank you!

ur such a politey omg. lovely idea, and this takes place in the ship! RYUSUI'S SHIP OUT AT SEA RAAAAAAAHHHH. ghhhh i RLLY WANT YALL 2 SEE MY ENVISIONMENT OF THIS. THE VEHEMENT CHAOS TO ENSUE

"OᑌT Oᖴ EᐯEᖇYOᑎE?"

[ᴛʜᴇ ᴄʀᴇᴡ'ꜱ ʀᴇᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ᴛᴏ ᴍ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ]

I feel like it would be during some sort of lax convo maybe in the evening. Like, just letting loose, having fun and talking. People getting to know each other, yada yada yada.

Then, somehow, it turns to the topic of dating.

Everyone's sat around one way or another, Gen by the side, Chrome standing front, Kohaku leaning against the chair Ukyo sits on. Ryusui, of course, in the center of it. Senku's just off to the side picking his ears.

Ryusui kicks it off when Gen recalls about him going on about how he loves all women, bla bla bla.

Gen goes "You must've dated a lot of women to say that then, Ryusui. Though, I'm not surprised..." Like, this guy's an heir to a billion dollar (or yen. or whatvr currency) conglomerate, skilled, and the muscles.

"Even though I hadn't, I'd still say so! Women are beautiful creatures, every one of them. Men, too!" and ugh go bi king go. "Right Ukyo?"

"What's this have to do with me?" Ukyo smiles nervously.

"Awe, cmon, I'm sure you've had at least some experience being as charming as yourself!" ryusui would egg him on, grinning brightly. "You strike me as a popular ladies' guy!"

and i headcanon that ukyo probably did have a lot of admirers back then. oh my gosh like look at him??

Senku yawns. Gen seems to notice him.

Kohaku also like mulls this over. "I also did have a partner once, though it was brief." Chrome gapes. "What?! So even the gorilla was able to date before me?!"

that earns him two hits to the head.

then gen would start teasing chrome like "But hey, atleast youre not the only one in the single for life zone with senku here!"

and senku goes like "huh."

"You're right!" chrome would pose, probably. "Must be because we're scientists! you know how we are, we're too busy being smart to actually-"

"I'm not single."

PAUSE.

almost everyone has like 'HUH' DOUBLE TAKE DOUBLE TAKE REWIND. (kohaku and ukyo probably just goin 'wow. thats actually interesting.')

"WHAT???"

Flabbergasted. ABSOLUTELY. FOR A FEW SECONDS EVERYONE THINKS HES DECIDED TO BE FUNNY. this guy?? THIS GUY?

First to react is ryusui going "AH HA! SO EVEN SENKU CANNOT RESIST THE BEAUTY OF WOMEN!" throwing his arm round his shoulder patting his back like fellow congrats bro

and people start demanding like who is this chick?? WHO SAW HIM AND WENT 'oh yah this is the one. yah.'

and senku raises a brow and goes "its a dude."

"😧😧😧😧😧😧😧"

Ryusui just goes "okay, well who's the lucky gentleman?!"

LIKE EVERYONE HAS A VARIED REACTION FROM UNBOTHERED (kohaku. she probably started picking her ears or something. ukyo takes this time to enjoy the fruitcake and help himself to the food) TO CHROME GOING "🏳️‍🌈😧🏳️‍🌈🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵?????" gen would just go "HOW LONG?? SINCE WHEN???"

Senku just groans and covers his ears are something something goin 'wth whyr u so loud ugh'

"I SAID WHEN????" Gen starts shaking him back and forth. leek hair man goes "uugggggg since middle school? idk i met him after taiju"

"WHAT THE HELL???" cue more shaking that senku feels like his brains vibrating. "YOU BASTARD WHY DIDNT U EVER TELL US THIS?? AND AFTER ALL THAT DRAMA???"

"you didn't ask??? also let go of me!"

head in hands absolutely floored like huh???

even senku goes like 'you couldve actually found that out by just asking taiju himself, or yuzuriha. its not even a secret dude.'

then thus comes the most important question, who is senku's infamous lover??? how is he?? WHERE IS HE?

"im not answering that first question. most likely still petrified. he were out on travel somewhere in the country when it happened."

and they have to go 'oh ok' and simmer in the fact and continue on with their lives as if nothing happened. like a nuke didnt just drop on them.

and senku was damn right because when each of them try to ask taiju on deck the next day he just outright goes "oh yeah senku's got a boyfriend. i'm great buds with him too! how did you know that? :D" cue another round of "HUH" from the other crewmembers on ship

[weebsinstash]

I sent an ask responding to the Izuku parts that I hope you got.(if not fml)

But I figured I should send a separate ask to talk about Miguel.

So like my thoughts have been centering on this scenario where you're his secretary or assistant because he is the CEO. He's a beta and you're an omega.

You guys have a purely professional relationship, tbh half the time he doesnt even realize you got you're heat and just finds out you called in when you dont respond. Really the only thing he cares about is you doing your work, getting it done on time, and not half-assing it.

But then he gets the spider DNA and everything goes to shit. Not only does the spider DNA give him extra abilities and enhanced senses, but it also gives him some alpha traits/tendencies.

He goes in to work thinking it'll help distract him and get him back in the rhythm of everything only to just get fucking hit in the face with your scent. Queue him rushing past because it takes everything in him not to just pounce on you.

But as I said, he only got a few alpha traits. He didnt actually become an alpha. So while he's out here wanting to just pin you to his or your desk, knot and claim you....he's completely incapable. His body is completely incapable of performing those actions and it only leans into his yandere behavior and tendencies.

I've also been think like(depending on how one writes abo), sometimes betas dont have a sent or if they do its extremely faint. Yandere beta miguel who cant even smother you in his scent because he basically doesn't have one, meanwhile you dont even realize he's changed at all because you cant smell it.

Though because he doesnt have a scent he would absolutely sneak into your house/appartment. Its basically the only upside in his eyes.

Also anytime you go into heat and have to miss work? He is immediately taking your seat from your desk and huffing it while he touches himself. Then at night as spiderman will come just close enough to be able to smell you but still not lose control of himself, absolutely getting off on your scent and sounds of pleasure from you using a toy.

God this shits been living in my brain rent free for like the last week and wont go away 😭

I got the Izuku ask :) trust me when I say I am simply dogshit awful at getting back to people and being consistent

Picture if Reader is actually a really competent employee of his at Alchemax but Miguel like BARELY pays any mind to you because, you know, he's got all sorts of shit constantly stressing him out and occupying his mind on top of migraine, and suddenly you're going into work and bringing him his preferred coffee as usual when, he tries to make small talk? You've worked for this man for like at least a year, basically only speaking when necessary, and one day you lean over to put a coffee or some papers on his desk and that brings you just close enough for him to take in a breath of your scent which instantly helps alleviate his headaches

You're basically done giving him what he needs and you're literally about to leave the room when he suddenly calls out (almost in a "wait I need to catch you before you leave" kind of urgency) and you pause and look at him with those big eyes of yours he suddenly can't stop staring into when Romeo hits you with "so .... how are you?"

And you're just kind of stunned for a few moments because this is a man who basically doesn't speak to you unless he needs something, even when you go to him to pass along a message or something or other about his schedule and your secretarial duties it's typically just a sort of "got it, thank you" sort of response and you're sent on your way again, or given another task, so in ao forth. You basically can't get a good read on the man's personality because he simply doesn't talk to you enough or at least about anything other than work

He officially enters the Goo Goo Eyes Zone where when you like someone almost everything about them is so cute and had more meaning than it actually does and is basically finally seeing you for the first time. He FINALLY notices what kinds of perfumes/body mists you like to use to smell nice even if it's something you've worn for ages, the ways you prefer to style yourself, which little accessories or rings or whatever may be your favorite, little mannerisms you may have like clicking pens or singing little songs when you think you're along, like when you're doing something and it's you're just like occasionally singing, like he finds you washing a coffee cup in the break room all "--and its doooOooone!"

The need to learn more about you escalates because suddenly he's like "wait I've known them for all this time and never noticed all these things, what ELSE don't I know?" And it really is an obsessive infatuation. You live in a high rise where you don't really have to worry about closing your blinds or anything which is perfect for Miguel "don't you know i have enhanced senses" O'Hara to watch you from the roof of the next building over. You never lock your windows because, what's the point? He starts learning your schedule and meticulously taking all kinds of notes until it's the level of him outright entering your apartment to snoop through all of your things and potentially plant bugs and cameras

One day you're opening your window and kind of poke your head out to look at the city and you notice weird sorts of, almost gouges in the wall outside? What are those from? (Well sweetie, turns out, when you were going to town on yourself last night to relieve a little stress, he was the equivalent of like 10 feet away, clinging to your building, listening to and potentially recording every little gasp and finger flick)

But he gets SO frustrated when you're, you know polite, but, not exactly as receptive as he's hoped? When in reality he's still being awkward as fuck and you're still kind of adjusting to him paying attention to you, and it probably feels good to have him seemingly recognizing your efforts but like, you don't wanna. date him??? At least not so suddenly or anything, so he's trying to court you, but, it's becoming harder and harder to be around you at all, let alone when your heats start coming up. He could never tell before that your scent starts changing when That Time is coming around, gradually shifting and becoming something he finds differently hypnotic, something that makes him want to bury his nose in your neck while also, being buried in you period

He'll grow the balls to be more direct with you eventually, but he justifies everything by telling himself he just wants to get to know more about you, and that the stalking is just him trying to get to know you a little more, so when he sees you face to face he can win you over and make you his mate treat you better, obviously! He'll... he'll ask you out to dinner next week, he promises! But for now, he's just gonna, stay right here perched under your window, seeing and hearing and smelling everything

[spookberry]

Hello I hope you are doing well! I wanted to say that I really love your art! Could I ask for more information about Henri and Claire, or just Henri in general? I think they're super cute but additionally, I think Henri is interesting by himself because I feel like I don't know as much about him! How long has he been immortal? How did he become immortal? How did he learn to exorcise? Oh, and I wanted to ask how you feel about fanart of your ocs? I really love Claire's design and I think it would be fun to draw him :)

:D! No one's ever asked me about Henri before! Also to answer your last question I'd love fanart of my OCs 🥺

More on Henri under the cut:

Okay so basically his backstory goes like this: back in the Victorian era there was this couple that was really into the occult. They were fairly nomadic, traveling the states as consultants when people were having supernaturally driven issues. This couple also happened to have a young son, Henri. Henri and his folks were very close and he took after them and their interest in ancient magic A Lot.

When Henri was about 9 his parents died. They left everything to him, but they didn't exactly have a house or anything, just a ton of old books and cursed trinkets. His favorite though was a book that was written entirely in ancient greek. So when he ran away to avoid being shipped off to live with relatives that didnt appreciate his interest in magic too much, that book was one of the things he thought to grab first.

Grief can make a 9 year old orphan do crazy shit, for Henri it became about trying to translate this book. Thats when he discovered problem number 2 with the book: its full of dark magic. Every spell in it is awful and corrupting. There's one unfinisged spell thats meant to banish a demon from their host body. And its like the one spell he can concieve of in this book that isnt just like flat out evil. So he decided to try and finish it.

The book also has a demon summoning ritual in it, so you can guess what he does.

After that he's saddled with Claire a 12 year old girl who is VERY mad it him about getting rid of her demon and demands he help her find him again. (Note: Claire does not realize he's trans yet here)

They try to summon skid back but it just doesnt work, so they gotta do this the old fashioned way.

Takes them months before they finally manage to track skid down again, but during that time the two manage to become friends. Claire opens up a lot about her fear of dying and how she feels she cant enjoy life because of how little time she has left. Henri decides his new goal in life is to heal her so that they can grow up and grow old together. He tells her as much and she gives him this gentle little smile and he internally is like "i would die for her" (he's in love but doesnt know it yet.)

Once Skid is back in and puppeting the body, Henri makes the choice to stick by Skid's side. He needs them to be close for when he finally figures out a way to heal her. And ya know the modern medicine of cough syrup with cocaine and mercury isnt gonna do it so he starts experimenting with magic instead.

He's 15 when he accidentally curses himself. Part of the curse effects his memory, so he doesn't actually know WHAT he did, and he doesn't even realize right away that he isn't aging. All he knows at first is that suddenly dark magics waaaay easier to do so he needs to be careful about that and also one of his eyes is fucked up. So now his secondary motive is also undo his own curse as well as heal Claire. Cuz itd suck if he finally heals Claire but isnt able to age himself, ya know?

Henri's a pretty chill guy and most of the cast view him as skid's 2nd in command and often her voice of reason(though he himself is prone to being impulsive and moody due to the whole technically still being 15 thing). The underlings also all view him as an older brother sort, because he's protective but often "hands off" in how deals with things but also hes just really tall. Lucky him he had his growth spurt before cursing himself to never age.

He tends to have a lot of memory issues, some days are worse than others. On his worst days he doesn't even remember how he met skid, but most days hes just sort of fuzzy and cant quite remember all 200 years he's spent by their side. His vision has also deteriorated with time, he cant see out of his left eye at all and can only make out colors and general shapes out with his left.

Even though he stuck with Skid for Claire's sake, Henri has actually become very close with skid after 200 years. Skid's secretive and doesnt actually like talking about themself honestly but depsite that he knows a lot about them. He knows skid has their own memory issues, and he's aware that Skid's not a full demon. He's heard skid's human name before but forgot it at some point and knows better than to ask about it. He's also very aware that Skid's prone to getting involved in shit which leads to them getting hurt magically and letting Claire run the body for a couple days every other decade. So they still get to see each other. These brief meetings is how Henri realized he was in love with Claire.

Bonus Info: Henri doesn't actually subscribe to modern labels and doesnt really consider himself as being into women or men. He just loves who he loves. (Hes asexual and panromantic)

Fun Fact: i came up with Henri and Skid when I was 12, but every other character in their story, including Claire, formed a slightly later.

^ skid and Henri drawings from when I was 12

[pool-floatie]

Starlet- Oneshot

Kids im back with the milk-

I am working on so much behind the scenes shit right now but this got done first, next we will probably get more bloodlusty vampires unless I suddenly decide different.

But GUYS I FINALLY WROTE COMFORT-

Like its angsty at the beginning but they need a reason to be comforted- d Uh

Please for the love of mE - emjoy :3

All Akari needed was the stars, they were a constant in an ever changing world, listened to her problems when she had no one else, creating beauty even in the darkest of times.

What she really needed right now though... Was a hug... A friend... Someone to tell her that things would be ok...

All she wished for in that moment was for that to be..

The trail of a comet flashed above her for a brief moment, wisping away almost as quickly as it had appeared.

she heard a vast wind rush overtop the trees, turning to look she couldnt see anything, -there wasnt any wind before... - She thinks.

A deep chuckle riverbates through the still air surrounding her, and she stiffens.

"So you're the mortal who summoned me... Such a strong pull, and such a bright aura, oh! lavender colored, what a sight ~ you certainly are quite a wondrous little thing, my, my...."

A shift in the air brings Akari's attention in front of her and her jaw drops taking in the sight.

There stands an enormous glowing being, bright white with flecks of golden stardust about them.

Their body starts to form and become more detailed and she can see their face and body take shape. Six limbs- four arms and two legs- take shape out of the glowing mass, Sharp white eyes open, a flowing tuft of hair floats above them, gently swaying like flames atop their head, and stardust dots their body like golden freckles.

"Oh, h-hello.." Akari said awestruck and nervous

"Hello little one, apologies for the exciting entrance." it said a bit embarassed trying to hide its excitement

It kneeled down and leaned forward trying to see the little human better, one pair of arms resting in their lap while the others rested, palms down in the grass

" its good to meet you, starlet, you may address me as Libra." it said in its airy tone.

Akari sat confused, but decided that this dream could be fun to engage with.

"Akari" she said, sticking out a hand towards the being.

Libra stared down at them and blinked in confusion.

" ah! This is your earthling welcome, yes!" they realised.

They reach out to the small woman, pinching her whole hand and part of her arm, before lifting it up and down slowly.

Akari grinns, the contact making her hand tingle with warmth.

Libra releases them and Akari thinks she sees a smile on their bright face.

"So... why exactly are you here?" Akari asks looking quizically up at them.

" you ,, dont know? You summoned me here with your wish!"

"My,,, my wish?? I didnt make any wishes ... "

Libra looks puzzled for a moment.

Akari goes to speak, but they stop as libras eyes glow blue, making a strange buzzing sound. They are no longer focused on akari, completely still.

After a few seconds Libras eyes blink back to white.

"ah! wow~ a rarer case indeed! It seems it was your emotion and thoughts that powered the wish, I knew I felt that strong energy in you, but enough to power a wish without a word being spoken ... " Libra said in awe.

"huh... Oh!- oh... "

Akari sighed, remembering her earlier feelings, her frustration and sadness.

"I, I think I know... what it was..." she said, resigned.

Libra tilted their head, giving the human a look of concern.

Akari didnt really want to tell a cosmic being a hundred times her size about her life problems.... But this was a dream anyway so...

"I have to move again..."

"mmm.. No thats not it .... Your aura didnt flare up...." they quickly interject

Libra looks down at the human with pity, truly wanting to help her. They lean forward a tad more.

" Whats really troubling you, little one?" they ask gently

Akari flushed in embarassment and shame, would this cosmic being judge her? Well...

"One of my roommates outed me as gay and now all the girls in my dorm think im a pervert-" Akari blurted

"They already started spreading rumors about me and reporting me to the landlord for stupid shit- so, I'm leaving before it ... gets worse...."

"Oh my... Thats certainly a predicament..." it sympathised but seemed confused , they continued.

"... Is humanity against happiness?" they asked mournfully, their light dulling a bit, seeming to know more than they were letting on.

Akari looked thoughtful for a moment, the cosmic beings words resonating with her.

"Wow,,, thats a... way of putting it... I mean, yeah, heh, every politician is against the queer community, anyone I try to get a job with or if I- lm just trying to find somewhere to fucking sleep, someone takes issue with 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 about me!... even when I tried to tell my family, they rejected me, too, haha! so yeah, your right, we fuckin' hate happiness."

She laughed a bit unhinged-ly while describing the absurdity of it all, the people she had encountered, the trials of her life, it seemed impossible to talk about without turning it into humor.

Akari rested her head atop her knees, looking goomily past the starlike being and letting out an indignant huff before falling onto her back and closing her eyes.

A moment passes and akari thinks she sees the immense light shift before she feels that same warm feeling, but, around her body?

Without a moment to think her body is hoisted up. As her eyes open she sees the towering form of libra, now holding her in their enormous open palm.

They flash her a pitying look before facing up, the other upper hand cupping around the confused human. Before she can even say anything, Akari is pressed down into the palm, the G force making movement near impossible, she cant see where they are going, only seeing the white light emenating from the enormous beings hands, she can only trust that the weird dream entity is as benevolent as they seem.

Akari can feel them coming to a slow stop as the force lets up and allows her to move again.

She tries to sit up, dazed , as Libra's hand lifts off her.

Looking around she can see nothing but immense darkness save for the being of pure light that holds her.

She turns to face said being, who looks excitedly at their passenger.

"hello little starlet~"

Libra said, its two overlapping voices echoing eachother.

"Hi, where the hell are we." akari snips, a bit jittery.

Libra dims again, shepishly pointing down with their upper hand while their lower pair fidgets nervously.

Akari gives them a confused look before they carefully creep towards the edge of her cosmic captors' hand.

Gripping the sides, they look over.

And immediately jump back, seeing 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘳𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘢 below them.

" ah, I see." she says calmly.

"Just a few questions for ya;"

They inhale

"Why in the s h i t did you do this and also 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘪𝘯 𝘨𝘰𝘥𝘴 𝘵𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘢𝘮 𝘐 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸 ?"

" aha! Its all ok! You can breathe just fine, please dont freak out!!"

Dispite being concerned about oxygen, Akari starts to breathe rapidly.

" theres no way im - in space right now - oh my god i - could die."

At this point they had completely forgotten that they were supposedly dreaming, focused more on the 'being manhandled by a cosmic giant' and the ' being in space millions of miles above the earth' thing.

"Human please relax, I brought you here to relax.." libra tries to explain

" this is not - relaxing!'

She says between breaths.

Libra looks disappointed, this was such a nice spot to stargaze, they really wanted the human to see...

But there was something else it Could try.

Gently, the glowing being closed their upper hands over the panicking form in their palm.

Before she could react to being enclosed, Akari again felt that immense warmth that could melt her, all over her body it felt tingly and content, she felt her muscles relaxing despite herself.

Finally she let herself be consumed by the feeling, relaxing and not worrying about any perceived danger that had her brain reeling just moments before.

Just as she did this, the lovely warmth started to dissipate, pulling off her despite her grabbing onto one of libras bright digits, a silent request for them not to stop.

Libra snickered at the cute display, bringing the girl out of her stupor.

She jerked her hands back and tried to suppress the enbarrased blush that filled her face.

" Sorry..."

Libra said

" N-no your fine" she said sheepishly

" No.. For scaring you..."

"Ah, that. Well,, uh I guess you can fly us to space and shit and im assuming you ...Magicked me to be able to breathe despite lack of oxygen?"

" you got it!" they affirmed, their cheerful tone reappearing.

"And I had good reason to bring you here! Look !"

Their lower arms gestured to the darkness before them as they beamed down at the little human.

".... Uhhhh... Wow?" akari said confused

"can you see something I cant?" she questioned, looking back at libra.

"Oh! right."

Libra dimmed, voluntarily this time, until they were only about as bright as a glow stick.

Finally, akari could see why even a cosmic being would appreciate such a place.

From earth, smog and light pollution would block most people from clearly seing such things.

But here, above the ozone layer, Akari could clearly see the milky way, its soft trail across the sky lived up to its name, fading softly at the edges into the rest of the cosmos.even still it was so stark, the white path cut the sky open like a geode, its center sparkling with stardust that flashed different colors as if it was being turned in the light.

She stared in awe as Libra looked on with a soft smile, occasionally sparing a glance at its little passenger to make sure they were alright.

They let the moment pass before speaking.

" Starlet. In the vast expanse of the cosmos, there are disasters , black holes, collapsing stars and other destructive things..."

Its three free hands gestured wildly, illustrating their words.

"But even from those, beauty is born. This nebula, your galaxy, was created from a collapsed star, it exploded, causing all around it to be thrown into chaos and confusion."

A look of sorrow flashes on libras face for a moment.

" But still, your planet thrived, using what was left to build a new world; one filled with life, with community, with love. Life does find a way."

They offer a gentle smile in reassurance.

" I believe you will find that.... your life does as well." they conclude.

Looking back to her newfound friend, akari feels her chest warm, swelling with an overwhelming feeling.

She lunges at the curled fingers, giving the pointer and middle the hardest squeeze she could manage, doing her best not to tear up.

Libra gushes at the adorably sweet gesture, and they cant help themself.

They pull the human close to them, belringing her into their chest, close to their glowing core.

Akari feels herself enveloped again, a simmilar feeling as before, but now filled with adoration and positive energy coursing through them, an immense, all consuming, all encompassing hug of pure affection and amorousness.

Unlike the melting, relaxing feeling before, she now felt a stronger sense, she felt Libras intention, its emotion and power guiding her thoughts and feelings, helping her to embrace and bring forth her inner strengths, akari could feel her self esteem break through the shroud of frustration and pain that had entrapped it, it swelled within her and she felt empowered, appreciated, and... 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘥.

[kindred-spirit-93]

*succinct & eloquent opening line. maybe a clever joke or quote* :D

do you ever sit there and contemplate your life choices after like a certain experience or a talk with a loved one?

do you ever come across a quote or a piece that seems like it was written for you in this particular moment in time? an anecdote that mirrors your current situation perhaps?

well im currently going through it & after a double whammy of mama lore TM during some resurfacing anxious & assorted crises, i dont even know what im going through anymore. but we shared a really sweet heart to heart and reminisced over good and less good times aw!

i am reminded that there is still much to life, light to be sought and found, good times yet to be had. its bittersweet. its mature. its scary? its like coming to terms with your mortality but on a smaller scale. or bigger whos to say...

i wont be venting anything, i think for now at least im content to vague post lmao. also my dad bought me some stress eating treats so i might need to go wallow in my feels for a bit

after i jinxed myself by saying im going on hiatus but failing to stay off the website lol (i had moot withdrawl symptoms sue me), i wont be repeating the same mistake, but with context clues i trust u can see where im going with this

it might sound presumptious to state so confidently that this next month of my life will be the hardest in my career, especially since im not even half way there yet, but the truth of the matter is that it is.

ive been struggling for well over a year now (mostly academically) and im both succeeding in places i didnt before (alhamdulillah!) but failing in the exact same places elsewhere. guys i may have anxiety lol

self fulfilling prophecies, nocebo effect, whatever it is & regardless of what you want to call it, its rough. its hard. im tired. theres still so much left and im tired. i shouldnt be this tired. or this empty. or careless. what have i let myself become? why am i punishing myself still?

this coming month will dictate the rest of my future and ill have no one to blame but myself if i let the opportunity slip through my fingers. but if all goes well inshallah i can put this all behind me and start anew so theres that silver lining :D

i kinda lost direction of this post about half an hour ago lol. my point is im going to try harder at balancing several life aspects bc i really cant put it off any more. i need to establish balance because ive been out of the loop for too long now. *shudders in python*

anyways there are plenty of things i have to work on, both in my studies and life, so i have that going for me *party kazoo noises*

id love to grace you all with some wise words or a life lesson or something but i dont have a neat one liner to sum up anything. despite that im writing this because sometimes letting thoughts float in my head isnt enough, i need to articulate and write it out because to let them roam in the vast expanses of my mind under the pretense that i achieved something is frankly silly as it is counterproductive.

a n y w a y , to anyone and everyone reading take care of yourselves and your loved ones. i wish everyone the best in life and in their endeavours. i will probably pop back in every now and again to catch up on messages and make sure everyone is alive and nothing burned down. i will however attempt to exert self control. (key word: attempt)

aight imma head out before i get too emotional or combust with the need to say something stupid like i love you be more unserious XD

[cara-carabowditbowdit]

please tell me more about crowley and aziraphale im Very interested /srs

ok so. this is gonna be a looong post sorry

BASICALLY. aziraphale is an angel, crowley is a demon. theyve known each other for 6,000 years, at the creation of the universe (when crowley was still an angel. he created stars and everything. very nice job) and theyve become great... friends (wink) even though theyre not supposed to be! so theyre not friends! theyre eeeevil enemies. and then they go out for dinner

anyways. idk how to explain it well but theyre just SOOOOO!!

ok so now im going to try and do like. a whole thing explaining everything below so SPOILERS!!!!

okay so. in the beginning aziraphale and crowley were both angels. they met when crowley was making stars and galaxies and all that pretty stuff, and aziraphale came to say that they were going to shut it down after a bit. crowley gets upset and goes whaaaa this is so cool why would they do that (lil thing to note. aziraphale is like. interested in crowley but he doesnt really care) and then they have some really nice scene

d'aww. ok and so THEN! some big war happens i think? i dont know they dont show that part and crowley falls. demon moment!!! and then they go through all these different decades being friends, getting to know each other, and its great. aziraphale sins a little bit (gluttony), crowley saves aziraphales books, and they all have fun. oh btw. crowley can transform into a snake, and apparently hes the one that caused adam and eve to eat the apple? BUT! theres this other great scene where theyre talking, and its revealed that aziraphale gave his flaming sword to adam and eve, showing that he loves humans and has a soft spot for them, and theres this other great shot

THE PARALLELS!!!!!!!!! AUUUGh (^ this one came before. btw) and so this is sort of them showing how ohh, theyre not supposed to hang out because angel good demon evil waaah but they just KEEP ON FINDING EACH OTHER. oh and. speaking of like. showing off different softer sides of them. in season 2, theres a lot of bits where they show that crowley is pretty much putting up this show of being so meaaan and eeevil but hes actually nice and cares about humans (bringing jobs kids back, keeping that girl from dying, etc). ok now onto talking about season one. warning i havent watched this season in a bit so this is just me going off memory.

ok so! the big issue this season is "oh noooo we lost the antichrist!! big bad things gonna happen" and its awesome. OK SO. it starts off with crowley delivering the antichrist to this satanist church? and theres two women having babies that night. ONE is a normal family, who are supposed to have a normal baby. THE OTHER ONE is a rich family who is supposed to have the EEEVIL baby. can u guess what happens. BABY SWITCH!!! they didnt realize it tho so crowley and aziraphale are sent after the wrong baby. (to make him sin/be good) and then they realize on his 11th? birthday "aw crud! wrong baby." and go on some search to find the right antichrist. and that brings us to ADAM!!! hes the antichrist, and one coooooool kid. hes pretty normal tho and just hangs out with his friends. and then one day on his 11th birthday this dog shows up! (hellhound) and then off on the side theres this witch lady named anathema device who has a book that knows the future. crazy stuff. oh and this guy names newt whos kinda a dork and talks to this weird witch hunter guy shadwell and his neighbor madame tracy. oh and the four horseman of the apocalypse are around and free OKAY. into it now. anthma knows something bad is going to happen (book), and she moves to london because thats where its gonna happen!! whaaaat!!! and newt moves to london because uhh. witch finder i think? and he goes to meet shadwell and accidently meets tracy. not important rn. shadwells kinda bonkers and freaks newt out. ok now onto anathema. im pretty sure that aziraphale and crowley were driving around (oh btw. he has a magic bentley) and hit her!! yeoch. and after driving her home she accidentally leaves her book in the bentley and aww they gotta meet up again aw shucks. okay now they go searching for adam (antichrist) and i dont think they find him? anyways i forgot how but then tracy shadwell newt and anathema all meet up with crowley and aziraphale and do a seance. i forgot what about but ohh nooo aziraphale is in madame tracys body!!! ok so i kinda forgot how again but somehow theyre all at some big area and the four horsemen and running around i forgot what theyre doing and BLAM ADAM SHOWS UP hes mad. hes trapped his friends into doing what he wants. hes gonna start the apocalypse. average 11 yr old stuff. BUT!!! crowley and aziraphale manage to calm him down and newt blows something up. idk whats going on anymore. satan comes out, "grrrah im ur father adam". its a nice lovely moment. but oh wait!!! gabriel (heavens big man) and beezelbub (hells high duke) come down/up and r like "yall r in biiiig trouble! cant be doin all this" and they try to kill both of them. aziraphale in hellfire, crowley in holy water. that scene comes and yoo wait theyre both alive??? this is insane!!!! theyre both MILKING it, bein dramatic and then. at the end. WHAOOOAH THEYRE ACTUALLY THE OTHER ONE?????

and thats the end of season one. okay so i know that this is incredibly long but im not even done. im going to reblog this later with me talking about season two and that should be shorter. OH BTW

thats what everyone looks like ^^

OKAY BYE!!!!!!

[jokeson-u]

ok so u know how even though allie and nat clearly weren't friends or anything, nat was somewhat protective of her when it came to the other members? like, defending the fact that shes a freshman, arguing about how freezing her out is bullshit, how angry she was at taissa after allies leg broke? i have a headcanon that when they were all junior varsity players, the some of the varsity girls treated nat like shit, and it totally contributed to her freshman and sophomore years being shit. and it wasnt cus she was a crappy player; natalie was always pretty good on the field. but some varisty girls still saw her as an easy target for other reasons. they often made jokes about how the locker room smells like booze and cigarettes the second she walks in, and about her generally worn down clothing. they talk a lot about how gross they think it is that she hooks up with older guys as a freshman/sophomore and joke about not wanting to catch anything from her. there was probably a couple varsity members who didnt participate and/or sometimes told the others to back off. natalie wanted to be that kind of person for someone, and she cant help but get defensive when the girls talk shit about allie.

on a more lottienat note. i picture there being a yellowjackets gathering after a game pretty early on. some varisty girls laugh about how they're glad natalie got the hint that she wasnt invited, and the JV girls are kinda uncomfortable cus they actually do kinda like natalie but they dont wanna get the same treatment so they usually dont say anything. at first, anyways. cus once the conversation goes past saying theyre glad shes not there and turns into random shit talk that isnt even true, lottie speaks up and says they shouldnt talk about her that way. the JV girls are kinda shocked and most the varisty girls were confused and vaguley annoyed. but they kinda laughed awkwardly about 'JV looking out fir JV, how cute,' and change the subject. of course, that made lottie a target to some of the particularly judgemental varsity girls. its not as bad as with natalie, but they give lottie a hard time and talk about how spoiled she is and that they heard she takes pills at lunch and this and that. natalie tells them to shut up once when she hears them talking about lottie, and it only makes things worse for her but she doesnt really care. lottie never has had a bad thing to say about her and is the only person that doesnt treat her differently when theyre around the varsity members

also, I think nats dad died near the end of sophomore year. while most the particularly bitchy varsity members graduated, a couple still lingered. all the news said was he died from a self inflicted gun wound to the head, so theres a lot of talk around the school about what really happened. a few days after it happens, nat still isnt at school, and some of the girls in the locker room swap theories theyve been hearing about really happened. one heard from her friend that nat dad was an employee at his dads shipping company and was recently fired, which is probably why he killed himself. another girl says she heard natalie is the one who killed him, and it was covered up cus shes a minor. lottie instinctively blurts out that natalie didnt kill him. the varsity girls kinda roll her eyes and ignore her, but one agrees and says he probably killed himself because he got sick of living in a trailer with a drunk wife and slut daughter. van yells 'hey!' without thinking at the same time as shauna goes to speak up before jackie stops her. a varsity girl who wasnt talking shit actually backs the JVs up up and tells varsity to drop it and focus on getting on the field. the remainder of the awful varsity members graduate soon after that. come junior year, the girls all made it to varisty. but at that point, natalie wasnt interested in being cloe to anyone on the team. mostly due to mistrust. but she always liked lottie for not treating her differently back in freshman/sophmore year, and van isnt too bad so long as natalie isnt drunk and getting weird looks from her. but she can be weary of taissa and mari, who can be pretty harsh with the JV players. obviously nothing like the varsity girls nat dealt with, but still, it rubs her the wrong way, so shes the first defend them from any unnecessary scrutiny

[cogbreath]

vent below idk what image to give to make it worth your while have geeked up spongebob sparkle

7 in the goddamn morning that family is YELLING YELLING. and by that i mean my. but i dont want to really be a part of it. not like they treat me like one anyway. really. except my mom. but when shit like this goes down im basically invisible. maybe its for the better that way. but i dunno. having to see that shit go down. really effects me still. i can enjoy watching nasty fights on reality tv and shit but this stuff isnt enjoyable. cuz like. well i live with these people and shit. whatever. point is. starts making some alters really freak out. i dont even really disagree with the ones who start feeling violent about it. if killing an abuser didnt land u in prison 4 life basically i dont think we'd even be dealing with this shit. probably cruel to say. but really whats cruel is someone who does this shit to people for 20 odd years. can i blame them at all for thinking that when we r like a caged animal who cant fidn a way out i really cant

itsnfine dont worey i wont let things come to that point. but ifnsomehow they do i guess my point that well you all know i tried ans you all know that the fucker had it coming and i will try to figure out how to fit a phone up my hole in prison ans i'll keep blogging as long as none of yall snitch

^ none of yall better act like thats something serious im being a bit funny but honestly i do think this site is pro killing your abuser more than other sites at least on the hypothetical level which helps becuse a lot of you won't disagree with us feeling that way

id love to do it but i wont because i've talked about it and alluded to it more than enough to warrant premeditation charge, and i wouldn't be able to feign innocence to hide it for the rest of my life and id always be paranoid about it so its not worth the mental weight either

i used to worry a lot that he would snap and kill me and mama

i guess it could still happen but i dont feel as scared about it as i used to.

maybe because i feel that im old enough to maybe stop it or at least be really hard to accomplish

this will all mean nothing when i forget about it mostly in a few hours

actually i'll be going to sleep in a few hours

since my schedule is literally the opposite of this family because i need time to myself

hopefully my dreams will be kind to me

i was really upset yesterday because i had a vivid dream where i was being affectionate and romantic with a guy who committed rape on me

woke up super disgusted and went back to sleep until 6 pm about it to get a better dream

does anyone on here care if i call it that if it wasnt violently penetrstive?

to me its a gross criteria plus what are you supposed to call someone who did less that that

whatever

point is i hsted the dream

all my dreams are vivid

many of them are lucid which is lovely

when they arent lucid though sometimes its awful but still its very vivid and all felt as real as life

this isnt really relevant anymore

right now i kind of feel nothing but my tummy hurts a lot

love you guys