#but it's grindeldore so of course it's painful

[gellert-1899]

Grindeldore Headcanon #10(more of a 9.5)

Albus actually never loved lemon cake or lemon candies that much. He liked the taste. They were fine. But he was never that obsessed over them as Gellert thought he was.

But he always got so happy when Gellert brought him some. Not because it was lemon candy, but because Gellert brought it. He felt like the candies tasted better when Gellert was the one that got it for him.

So in time, he had grown to like lemon sweets more. He loved how something sour can be yet so sweet. He also loved how Gellert always had some for him. Just because he thought Albus loved them so much.

After that summer, lemon candies never tasted that good. But Albus started to like them more. Because then, he realised what he loved about the candies.

They tasted like loving Gellert.

Sour, yet sweet.

And eating them was just like remembering all the things they did together that summer. All his memories with Gellert.

Sweet,

And yet sour.

[apicelladonna]

(Ferte in noctem animam meam) Grindeldore one shot, post HBP.

Dumbledore’s steps were slow, each one a battle against the searing pain that coursed through his withered body. The blackened, necrotic flesh of his right hand, throbbed like Greek fire kissed it. He felt the corruption spreading further now, creeping up his his upper torso and nearing the place where he thought his heart would be.

The gates of Nurmengard loomed before him, a once-proud fortress now decayed in the shadow of its former master. He stepped through it, the scent of rot heavy in the air. Dead Aurors and house-elves littered the courtyard, victims of the final assault of the dark lord's quest for answers.

The war had turned, its tides sweeping away what little hope had once flickered. Now, that hope rested on the shoulders of the young. All of them carrying the burden of a world too heavy for a hopeful future.

Each step up the spiral staircase was torture. His breath rattled in his chest, and his vision blurred with pain. But still, he climbed. He knew what awaited him at the top. He knew why he had come.

The door to the tower was ajar. Tom had been here.

He paused for a moment, his weary mind spinning through the possibilities. Tom Riddle had sought out the only other dark wizard who had once held the Elder Wand.

Gellert.

He had come for answers, but he would have found none. Albus knew this because he knew Gellert Grindelwald better than anyone alive.

In his arrogance, his pride, his twisted sense of loyalty, Gellert would never have divulged the truth. Not to Tom. Not to anyone.

And now Albus no longer held the wand. Its allegiance had shifted—first to Draco Malfoy, and who knows where after. Perhaps Voldemort had realized this. Perhaps that was why he had left Gellert like this.

Dumbledore stepped through the doorway into the tower room.

Gellert lay crumpled on the cold stone floor, his thin prison robes hanging limply over his wasted frame. His once-vibrant eyes, those piercing mismatched eyes Albus had known so well, were vacant now, staring at nothing.

He was a hollow shell, a body left to rot where it had fallen. Tom Riddle had not even afforded him the dignity of a final word, a final glance.

Albus took a shaking breath, his heart breaking in a way it hadn't in decades. Gellert. The boy he had loved. The man who had turned into his greatest enemy. And now this—just another casualty of a war that had stretched over lifetimes.

With every ounce of strength he had left, Dumbledore knelt beside him. Pain shot through his body, but he ignored it, his focus solely on Gellert. Gently, he took the rigid, lifeless body in his arms, lifting him so that Gellert could sit upright against the stone wall. The old wizard’s hands shook as he closed Gellert’s eyes, those once-bright eyes that had seen so much of the world’s wonder and darkness alike.

There were no words. What could he say? No eulogy would ever be enough for the complicated, tragic life of Gellert Grindelwald. He had been a visionary and a tyrant, a lover and a monster. And now, he was gone.

No one would come to mourn him. No one would check on the man who had once threatened the very fabric of the magical world. In the midst of another wizarding war, with Voldemort's shadow creeping ever closer, Gellert Grindelwald was just another body, forgotten in the chaos.

And Albus—Albus would soon be another as well.

He leaned back against the cold stone wall, his cursed hand resting limply in his lap. The pain was unbearable now, the curse nearly overtaking his entire body.

But for this moment, there was peace. There, in the silence of the highest tower, with the dead all around, he could rest.

Beside the man he had once loved. Beside his heart.

Beside Gellert.

The world could wait a little longer as Albus closed his eyes, resting on the other wizard's shoulder.

[forestdeath1]

thoughts on Grindeldore?

You mean, do I like this ship?

I LOVE IT!!!! It's such an exciting ship.

Two geniuses, two lovers, two enemies, so much potential for good drama.

I've always liked Grindelwald because... I mean, yeah, he's not good, but he's a very interesting politician, not as self-absorbed as Voldemort. Grindelwald is more human and much more interesting than Moldy Voldy (although the entire fanfic about Alphard is dedicated to Tom Riddle, I find him really interesting as a character, but it's obvious that Grindelwald is far more ambitious in his actions). Dumbledore is interesting to me too, damn, the guy really wanted to take over the world. Genius often goes hand in hand with madness.

This ship will always have a lot of politics, and I love that too!!!

In the fanfic about Alphard Black, I paid a lot of attention to Grindelwald's politics and the war in general, especially the Blitz (which evokes a lot of emotions for me, I shed so many tears when I delved into that topic), I think it was important for the wizards too. But!!! I DON'T believe that Grindelwald and Hitler worked together, let's leave Hitler aside, of course, these two wars influenced each other, and Grindelwald took advantage of the chaos and what the Muggles were doing, but I think it's horribly wrong and painful when people write that Hitler was a pawn of Grindelwald. It immediately absolves Hitler of all responsibility. For us Europeans, the topic of World War II is very painful, and we need to be careful with it.

In general, Grindeldore is an exciting, complex, and very interesting ship with huge potential.

I'm not sure if I could write it, it's too complicated for me.

[ourgreatergood]

⭐star⭐

Thank you so much! <3

So, let me tell you about the evolution of "The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore"

Even though "all too well" is definitely more popular and also close second in my favorite stories, its older sister is still even closer to my heart.

I literally started writing Life and Lies almost ten years ago. I wrote it in German (my first language) and I wrote it in the span of one summer. I wrote it after I experienced terrible heartbreak and (at least emotionally) the whole impact of my dysfunctional family dynamics came crashing down on me and honestly it just felt like my world was collapsing - in short, I was suffering from severe depression and adjustment disorder. And I did what I've done my whole life to survive: I started living in my head even more than usually and I wrote to stay some kind of sane. And what did I write? Which fictional character had to suffer for me? Of course Albus. Always Albus.

You have to imagine at this point in time all the grindeldore information I have is from the HP books and from a couple interviews with the author. No CC in sight, not even dreaming of FB ever happening.

In the beginning it was three parts: Summer of 1899, Ariana incident and the Duel in 1945 and they were actually written in that order. Only much later I put them together and filled the blanks to form one cohesive story.

Now, in the very first version of the summer of 1899 Albus and Gellert kissed exactly once. I was still going by the whole unsure if Gellert returned Albus's feelings kind of vibe - I always believed he did, but at this point I believed he was only going to be aware of it much much later in life. (At this point shout out to some exceptionally inspiring fanfic, a character study of Gellert in Nurmengard. It's German, but if you understand that, give it a read! Nebel über Nurmengard)

I wrote Albus very in love and Gellert being very manipulating.

And there's more: The first version of the 1945 duel? Albus was almost ready to confront Gellert, after years of everyone begging him. Almost. He went to meet him and he still tried to talk Gellert out of his whole war one last time. Gellert, in turn, offered Albus to join him again and when Albus declined, what was the breaking point for Albus to get his courage up to fight? It was Gellert telling him that he had been manipulating him all along - and believe me, he was cruel at that. (Of course it was always up to the reader to decide whether to believe Gellert or not and the story was always going to end with making it clear that at least in later life Gellert realised that he'd loved Albus all along.)

I swear to you I think I have never written anything as painful as those early versions of Life and Lies. I remember very well that I cried writing some of it, but I'd sworn I would stay true to canon (at the time) and just fill in the missing scenes. I think, looking back now, that it was very cathartic for me, that I needed exactly that but, boy, am I glad that I get to write a different story today - canonically!

That story was edited so many times over the years, I can't even count and tbh I would have to edit it again with FB and all, but I won't. That's what it's got its sister for now.

(Honestly, feel free to ask further questions about this. I'm not sure I've still got the early versions, but I remember them so well lol.)

[sparksadrift]

I'm not even high, I don't understand what happened - but I sort of wrote a blurb for a Fantastic Beasts Parody, meant to pair with A Very Potter Musical, only it's mostly Grindeldore and pizza, and IT'S SO STUPID. I DON'T KNOW WHY I WROTE THIS.

A Very Fantastic Musical [Alternate working title: A Very Fantastic Pizza.]

Starts with summer 1899, big ol' number that suddenly ends with a somber imperative dance or something. Lights, pizazz, then young Albus flopped in some tragic Shakespearean pose - ends with a punchline of some kind.

Then it cuts to Hogwarts maybe, an echo-y reprisal as it reveals older Albus looking in the mirror, seeing all the summery pizazz, reflecting.

The blood pact is something stupid, like a pizza pendant, because Gellert and Albus both shared a love of pizza. On the fence about sausage euphemisms... Oh God. Then it turned out that Gellert was lactose intolerant all along, a heinous betrayal.

There's going to have to be a song about pizza, all wistful and morose eventually. Just know it.

Newt is still in school, and for some reason Jacob is there, because Albus was all - fuck it, here's a toy wand, just pretend.

I want Rumbleroar to be some wise counsel or something. Scarfy sorts Gellert as a sadistic fuck, and Albus is obviously as gay as the fourth of July, cause keeping with the Americanism and all that.

Then, I dunno, everyone splits off into teams, the goodies and the baddies, and Fawkes does something cool I guess.

I want Gellert to be all Shakespearean with unexpected profanities. He just crucio's everything. Even the chair, and someone yells it's not alive, it can't feel pain, and Gellert is all, anything can feel pain if you try hard enough! Crucio's his tie when he can't get it right, gets himself by accident. Adorable. Cut to Albus sobbing, no, Gellert, not the pizza!

WHY IS IT PIZZA LMAO???

OH MY GOD and Gellert can have a crystal ball, and sees Voldemort at some point, peers all close and shit, taps the glass because he isn't moving, like the screen is frozen, then Voldemort goes BOO! and does that insane cackle only Joe Walker can do, scaring the shit out of him. Ends up being like girl talk, but it's dark lord talk instead, then they heatedly argue about who's wand is bigger hahaha. Yeah well, *I* have a fortress! - And *I* become immortal, you swiiiine!

The running gag is figuring out when Albus's birthday is. He's Ron with food, only it's sweets, so he can do the Red Vines bit at least once. Constantly licking a lollipop, cause why not. A fucking rainbow of outfits, some are definitely sparkly, and he changes like every other scene. Maybe some split suits to save time lol.

Something about a pinky promise with the blood pact, and Gellert has a hissy fit and is all but everyone knows you can't go back on a pinky promise! And Albus is all, that was a long time ago, I'm a changed man, my pinkies have physiologically changed cells several times over, in fact-

Gellert grumbles and huffs and calls him a nerd or something, and is all what about our pizza? You promised we'd make it, together. Albus- YOU LIED TO ME GELLERT, YOU MADE ME BELIEVE *sobs* THAT YOU COULD DIGEST DAIRY. Gellert- It was never about eating it. It was making it, together - swirling the sauce across the soft dough, the sprinkling of infused herbs-

*Albus snaps out of his dazed dream, in which they swirl the imaginary sauce and breathe in the happy aroma of a promised pizza* I told myself I'd never touch another pizza...

This is totally when the wistful and morose pizza song occurs, with an echo of the pizazz in the background, and Gellert serenading Albus with a list of possible cheese blends.

Of course, Gellert's best argument is lactose free cheese, which makes Albus sob THAT'S NOT A FUCKING PIZZA AND YOU KNOW IT! This is just another of your sick experiments! You're twisted!

I'm howling at this, I can't - it's so fucking ridiculous. I can't with this plot.

Bro - then Jacob makes them a pizza at the end.

Or sends them a kit at least, so they can make it together.

...I have more ideas for all the other characters too, and the casting and everything, and I'm so pissed and pleased with myself all at once. I have no fucking clue why it's pizza. I blame dinner. No hate to non dairy cheese!

[alastorseye]

About Remadora

When I say I really hate the HP fandom, I'm talking about the "fans" that hate everything about the saga, but still having Harry Potter accounts. They change the original story, claim that fanonical facts are canon, and launch hatred and death threats at those who simply like HARRY POTTER JUST THE WAY IT IS. Yes, I'm mostly talking about Marauders fans, which I joined after reading the books because I thought it would be interesting and funny. I suddenly realized how toxic and hateful that fandom was, it's like a cult dedicated to deifying Remus, Sirius, James and Regulus, and it seems that hating Snape, Dumbledore, and Remadora is a requirement to be a part of it.

At the beginning I used to consider Wolfstar as something funny, a bromance, it never bothered me, I mean... every fandom has fanon ships and I respect that, but the way they always hate Remadora and their shippers is something that MUST stop.

"You see!" said a strained voice. Tonks was glaring at Lupin. "She still wants to marry him, even though he's been bitten! She doesn't care!"

"It's different," said Lupin, barely moving his lips and looking suddenly tense. "Bill will not be a full werewolf. The cases are completely -"

"But I don't care either, I don't care!" said Tonks, seizing the front ofLupin's robes and shaking them. "I've told you a million times. . . ." And the meaning of Tonks's Patronus and her mouse-colored hair, and the reason she had come running to find Dumbledore when she had heard a rumor someone had been attacked by Greyback, all suddenly became clear to Harry; it had not been Sirius that Tonks had fallen in love with after all."

"And I've told you a million times," said Lupin, refusing to meet her eyes,staring at the floor, "that I am too old for you, too poor . . . too dangerous. . ."

When I read this part of the HBP I realized that Remadora was my favorite Harry Potter ship. Of course I wasn't aware of the death threats I'd receive later. I've read some "reasons" why some fans hate Remadora.

"Tonks forced him!"

We all know how insecure Remus was. I don't have to explain what's written in Wizarding World (Pottermore). This is the Remus bio:

Well, we can read that Remus was really attracted to Dora.

"Remus, so often melancholy and lonely, was first amused, then impressed, then seriously smitten by the young witch. He had never fallen in love before. If it had happened in peacetime, Remus would have simply taken himself off to a new place and a new job, so that he did not have to endure the pain of watching Tonks fall in love with a handsome, young wizard in the Auror office, which was what he expected to happen. However, this was war; they were both needed in the Order of the Phoenix, and nobody knew what the next day would bring. Remus felt justified in remaining exactly where he was, keeping his feelings to himself but secretly rejoicing every time somebody paired him with Tonks on some overnight mission".

This is so sad and cute, and that's undeniable. I cried when I read it. If someone still thinking that Dora forced Remus to marry her after reading this paragraph... I mean... they're probably talking about another book series.

"The age gap!"

I'm so satisfied to know that some Remadora shippers have explained this. When it's about a kid and an adult... OF COURSE IS HORRENDOUS! Because children are not physically and mentally prepared to have romantic relationships. Wizards are legally adults at 17, REMUS MET TONKS WHEN SHE WAS 21!

I mean, many old people abuses of young people innocence, or something. But we all know that Remus wasn't one of those! He really loved Tonks, and that's canon. I don't know what's doing in the fandom people who denies canon facts.

Remus and Tonks were two physically, mentally, and legally adults loving each other.

"Remus didn't love her!"

He was an introvert, Tonks was an extrovert, she made his life better. And of course, I loved the way he introduced himself when he was trying to prove he wasn't a Death Eater:

"I am Remus John Lupin, werewolf, sometimes known as Moony, one of the four creators of the Marauder's Map, married to Nymphadora, usually known as Tonks, and I taught you how to produce a Patronus, Harry, which takes the form of a stag." (Remus Lupin, DH)

Maybe I'm not the only one who perceive he was proud to be Nymphadora Tonks husband.

"I.. I made a grave mistake in marrying Tonks. I did it against my better judgment and have regretted it very much every since". (Remus Lupin, DH)

This phrase makes more sense after reading Remus bio. He used to think that he was "too poor, too dangerous" for her. He thought he wasn't enough for her. He never imagined that she would love him back. He was a werewolf, and of course he knew he was dangerous, you only need to be emphatic to realize he tried to get away from Tonks because he loved her, he didn't want to hurt his beloved woman!

If you don't believe me, read this again. It's in the chapter 11 of Deathly Hallows:

"Don't you understand what I've done to my wife and my unborn child? I should never have married her, I've made her an outcast!"

So, if Remus was trying to escape it's because he loved them, he thought he spoiled their lives. And of course, no one likes to feel that their influence is bad for someone they love!

"Their relationship came from nowhere! They don't have a development"

Well, the saga's name is HARRY POTTER, not The Love Life of Remus Lupin. The story is about the tragic life of this kid and everything he went through to save the world of a cruel and dark villain. I know many readers are young people in love, and they only want to ship everything, but that's not the main topic here, maybe mother's love would be the topic. Of course Ron and Hermione had a development because they were HARRY'S BEST FRIENDS, and they were always with him, from Philosopher's Stone to Cursed Child. Remus and Tonks are minor characters, and it's funny the fact that this usually comes from Wolfstar shippers, so... is Wolfstar more developed than Remadora?! I mean... they can ship whatever they want, Snape and the Sorting Hat, Dobby and Voldemort, anything, but that does not give them the right to disrespect such a cute, tragic and beautiful canon ship as Remadora.

"They are queercoded! Their relationship is homophobic!"

It's surprising to hear this. It's like... people gets angry just because the author doesn't make queer their favourite characters? I will explain why I don't think Remus and Tonks are "queercoded":

Whether through their dress, their behavior, their language, or other subtle forms of implication, queer characters were written or designed to communicate their unstated queerness to those who were searching for representation.

And this is the definition on the website Pride.com:

"Using LGBTQIA tropes and stereotypes to allude to a character's sexuality without explicitly confirming it in the text."

We all know that Disney used queercoding on characters like Ursula, Scar, Jaffar. And why do we know that? Because DISNEY WANTED TO PORTRAY THEM LIKE THAT, get it? Disney, THE CREATORS MADE THESE CHARACTERS INTENTIONALLY QUEER. How? BASED ON STEREOTYPES.

And going back to Remadora, I was really happy to see by first time a bada*ass woman, with short hair who wasn't portrayed as a lesbian just because the way she looks. This character didn't follow the: "Straight women have long hair and are girly", and "short dyied hair is for lesbians". I'm very very very surprised the fandom follows these stereotypes.

About Remus: I don't know how the phrase "being a werewolf is a metaphor about people with HIV AIDS" means "he's gay". Fenrir Greyback bit him when he was a kid. Many people interpret this as "r4pe". Okay, even thinking that it is the meaning of the "bite", I still cannot understand how being "r4ped" and "infected" makes him queer. Is this (again) a stereotype about people with AIDS and gay?

"JK Rowling created Remadora because she didn't like people shipping Wolfstar!"

It is true that fans love shipping everything, they queerbait and queercode everything. That's great, that's not the problem. The problem is when people starts bashing fans who ship canon straight couples. A very good example is the polemic on Falcon and Bucky relationship, some fans wanted them to be a gay couple, Anthony Mackie said that two men can only be friends, and there is no need to always give them a romantic connotation. People cancelled him, they called him homophobic. Yes, just because a person with authority (on the story they're following") didn't like the fact of queercoding their favourite characters. It's the same about Remadora.

Grindeldore is a very interesting and underrated couple by the way. You can love or hate JK Rowling, but the truth is that Harry Potter story is hers, and even if Remadora was "because she didn't like Wolfstar", she is the author, it was her mind where these characters first appeared, as a big Harry Potter fan I respect and like the original story, that's not a sin. An author has the right to make some changes if some characters were misunderstood by the readers.

(Yes, I wrote this a bit angrily since I've seen too much hate towards Remadora shippers)

[ggadtomarry]

Tom/Albus (riddledore?) Fic Idea. Dead dove, non-con threatened, warning!

Teenager Tom feeling things with Albus. Anger, it must be anger. Sadness because Dumbledore dislikes him, all the other professors absolutely love studious genial hard working Tom but Dumbledore is always... disappointed in him. As if he knew how much he bullies and terrifies the weak students.  As if he knew how often he dreams to kill the people who annoy him.

And then. The most horrible things happen. Puberty. Thanks fuck he doesn't care for sex, his hormones-pumped body is like an untrained beast . Disgusting.

And then the wet dreams. Tom really needs to kill someone soon. Maybe Dumbledore. Because his wet dreams are shamefully about him. He's the most interesting the most powerful the most  clever of all his professors, he can't help it! He also knows that Dumbledore would never let him do a thing, never ever. So. Spying and stalking. Until he will be strong enough to force him. Or forget about him. Or kill him.

And while he's magically spying... he assists to a Grindeldore scene. Like, Gellert really is in Albus' office. They are screaming , then crying  then kissing then... Tom is out. This shakes him, turns his life over its head.

Dumbledore has a relationship with a dark wizard wanted in all Europe?! How shameful! How hypocrite! How... useful.

So Tom brushes his hair (why?! He's always dressed impeccably!) and goes to Dumbledore's office. He lets him in, a bit surprised, Tom hasn't come here in the last 2 years.

No time to waste, Tom tells him what he saw (pain, remorse, regret, shame in his blue eyes, and Tom rejoices).

And then he tells him the price of his silence. Albus is startled, and refuses. Fool. Tom explains it better: or Dumbledore lets him touch him and do anything he likes, or he will tell the whole school what he saw. He will personally inform the press. Dumbledore will be arrested and brought to Azkaban for life.

Albus refuses, and asks him why he is not bothered by Grindelwald. Tom is like "eh, he's right about muggles, isn't he?", and tries to touch Albus' hand.

Without effort Albus freezes him. He explains he will never ever touch him, that forcing someone is disgusting, that Tom really disappointed him. Tom can tell who he wishes what he's seen, but nothing of these 3 things will change. He will sooner escape than touch Tom.

And then Tom is kicked out of his office, the magic force so strong he falls down. Humiliation, shame, rage, hate, desire to hurt the person who hurt him so so much.

He won't tell anyone no, he doesn't have any proof indeed, just that mocking image every time he closes his eyes.

He tried playing nice. Dumbledore will regret rejecting the honor to be touched by him.

(Of course this is Tom's warped perspective. In truth, Albus will never touch a student, and tries to explain why it is wrong. Tom just hears "I don't want to touch you because you disgust me". Then Tom tries to physically assault him and then Albus is out of patience).

[the-marron]

Tag Game

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have less than 20, just list them all!). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favorite opening line. Then tag 10 of your favorite authors!  

Thanks @verochkasnightmarecorner for tagging me! :D

I decided to include my works solo, not counting works I created with @dobranocka because a lot of these opening lines are not mine, even though I love them a lot. So, from the newest to the oldest:

1. The party is in the full swing, the mansion filled with laughter and not-so-secret business deals conducted on the expensive sofas and in the darkened hallways. (WIP, Weilan Derrivatives, LNS/LF mob au)

2. It started with a joke. (There Can Be Only One, Guardian, Weilan, crack)

3. Guo Changcheng is very confused about how he ended up here. (Come my love, be one with the sea, Guardian, Weilan + ChuGuo, POTC au)

4. When Shen Wei looks out of his window, the familiar black car is already there.  (Constant Vigilance, Guardian, Weilan, 1930s spy au crack)

5. Shen Wei had always assumed that he was used to pain. (The Once And Future Hei Pao Shi, Guardian, Weilan, post-canon crack )

6. Click. Click.

The eyes move, their brown irises catching light. (Deceive me kindly (while I'm still here), Guardian, Weilan, steampunk!au )

7. Everyone had their limits. (One Prize I'd Cheat to Win, Guardian, Weilan, no powers!au )

8. Shen Wei is not sure where they are heading. (When I walk past the mountain peak, it doesn’t speak, Guardian, Weilan, post-finale fix-it)

9. “No,” Lao Chu says and glares at them for good measure. (The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Dragon City, Guardian, Weilan, crack )

10. It’s the beginning of their second week under when they finally have a breakthrough. (Jia Jia and The Guardian Lantern, Guardian, Weilan, canon compliant post-finale fix-it)

11. “Get him!” Those are the last words that leave Zhao Yunlan’s mouth as he disappears in the wormhole, and Shen Wei doesn’t have the time to wonder, to think, because if he doesn’t act now Zhao Yunlan might disappear forever. (Changed Course, Guardian, Weilan, fix-it )

12. "Let’s make a bet,” Shen Wei says, and his voice has this raw honesty to it that stops Zhao Yunlan from whatever goodbye he tried to formulate. (When I Make an Oath to the Flames, Guardian, Weilan, post-canon break-it and make it worse)

13. Zhang Chengling was aware that he wasn’t exactly an average kid. (There's Nothing in This World I Wouldn't Do, Word of Honor, Wenzhou, modern au crack)

14. “I would really like it if you came,” said Chengling, his voice gradually getting quieter with each word. (Journey's Homeward Bound, WoH, Wenzhou, modern au crack)

15. This is the last one for tonight. (We Watch and Burn and Reign , DC Comics, TimJay, Talon au )

16. It started as a joke. Or rather, it started as a genuine need for information that got turned into a joke because, well, Jason. (Red Robin and Red Hood’s Comprehensive Guide To Bat Romance, DC Comics, TimJay + others, crack. Longer quote because wtf, I started two separate fics the same way???)

17. When Jason wakes up, he wishes he hadn’t. (Stones of Fear, Stones of Doubt, DC Comics, TimJay, canon-compliant? )

18. “We need Grindelwald,” Albus Dumbledore, the Marshall of the last base ready to fight the Kaiju had never anticipated having to say this out loud. (To Fight Monsters, We Created Monsters, Fantastic Beasts franchise, Grindeldore, Pacific Rim au)

19. Being a hero is easy. You beat up the bad guys, save innocent citizens, earn the love of a beautiful lady, preferably a journalist, and become a beacon of hope to everyone. (Face to Face, My Lovely Foe, Haikyuu!!, Bokuaka, superhero au, once again a longer quote because wow, are they brief)

20. Hinata had heard stories about strange creatures living in the forest. (Sword in the Stone, Haikyuu!!, Bokuaka + Kagehina, Arthuriana au)

Soooo... I apparently have the unfortunate tendency to start out with short setences that tell the reader absolutely nothing at all. This, or dialogues. And I managed to repeat the exact same sentence in two separate fics, wow.

I think my favourite opening line so far is from the steampunk au, mostly because I actually like the whole beginning of this fic and I enjoy the fragment that follows the opening line, aside from that, the WIP one is the most enjoyable for me, I think.

Interesting experience, really, I like this tag game, it changed my perspective a bit, and I remember doing this a few years ago and the openings looked completely different and I had different observations, so yay progress?

Tagging @flamboyantlycriminal, @dobranocka, @the-cookie-of-doom, @wyfto2812, @flsongbird722, if you feel up to it, it’s fun :)

[kember-writes]

First Sentence Tag Game

Thanks for the tag @theonlywolfpants!

Rules: List the first lines of your last 20 stories (if you have fewer than 20, just list them all!). See if there are any patterns. Choose your favourite opening line. Then tag some people to take part.

---

Finished Fic

1. There was a girl in Sirius’s room. — Paper Walls (Wolfstar college roommates)

2. The Year Without a Summer, that’s what they were calling it in the newspapers, but Sirius Black couldn’t honestly say he’d noticed the difference. — Goetia (Wolfstar Regency infernal romance)

3. Remus fell awake with a start, and for just one blessed moment he allowed himself to believe that everything – the events of the last few days – it had all been some hideous nightmare. — Stay (Wolfstar-raising-Harry heartbreak)

4. “We really shouldn’t be drinking while we’re on watch,” Harry commented, setting the half-empty bottle of whiskey down on the rock between them. — Whiskey on the Rocks (Rarry besties-kiss-all-the-time)

5. He found Regulus sitting in a secluded corner of the library beside a tall window, almost hidden behind a stack of books, ignoring the rain that lashed against the leaded diamond panes beside him. — The Night Shows You (Blackrose overwork-isn't-sexy)

6. James was just about ready to die of embarrassment, and he hadn’t even started the damn essay yet. — Sex Education in School Isn’t Something We Can Rely On (Moonchaser public sex)

7. Sirius appraises himself in the mirror, then grimaces, then scowls, and plucks at the front of his old robes. — Wasted (On You) (Wolfstar heartbreak... uh, again)

8. “Wait a minute, are you jealous?” — Grey-Eyed Monster (Prongsfoot heartbreak! Change of pace)

---

WIPs (in various states of completion)

9. It’s a beautiful morning in Godric’s Hollow, as it always is. — Best in Show (Wolfstar village idiots)

10. There was something about the promise of an early-morning practice that got James’s blood racing, made it difficult to fall asleep the night before and easy to wake up the morning of. — The Inside Track (Jegulus sports rivals)

11. It was a mad plan. — Under His Thumb (Drarry wild-scenario-leads-to-tender-moments)

12. Question One: Outline the appropriate procedures for dealing with (a) a Boggart; (b) a Chameleon Ghoul; and (c) a Pooka; and, (d) summarise the similarities and differences between these methods. — untitled Hogwarts story (not giving away any details suckaz :P)

13. Fun fact: the more times you run away from school, the less they care when you do it again. — untitled (older Wolfstar + Drarry spy AU)

14. Remus had turned his back. — Predator (Wolfstar heartbreak LOOK YOU KNOW THE DRILL... and mutually beloathed Rematrix...)

15. Lily was way, way out of her depth. — The Prince of Cordoba (Jily/Wolfstar/abortive Starflower medieval royalty)

16. Remus felt like he’d been punched in the gut, and when he pulled his hand away from his side it was slick with blood. — Long Shot (Wolfstar Victorian sick-fic but the "sick" in question is several bullets)

17. The cell in Nurmengard was nothing if not predictable. — Für das Allgemeinwohl (Grindeldore old flames)

18. Miss Bertha Jorkins, of Blackmoor, Hampshire, had always been exceptionally observant. — Saturnalia (Wolfstar Regency Christmas demon haunting with gratuitous mental torment of Walburga Black)

19. The wolf, of course, had always been silver, the colour of raindrops in moonlight. — Old Dogs, New Tricks (middle-aged post-war Wolfstar)

20. Remus had been ignoring James’s stare for the past ten minutes, but he could feel it prickling the back of his neck and his resolve was at breaking point. — It’ll Be Fun (Amortentia drinking game gone horribly right - Wolfstar/Jily/Dorlene/James^2/Moonflower/Mary & Peter sports commentators extraordinaire)

---

So what we've learned from this is that I love causing pain to My Boys and that, wow, I really like starting things!

Fairly sure everyone I know has been tagged in this or decided to take part of their own volition, but if you haven't, please consider this your tag.

[uthseikoashx-inflamedme]

Personal favourite HP (&FB) fanfictions (but unfortunately it’s mostly GGAD)

posted: 08-10-2020 edited: 08-24-2020

(really sorry for the mistakes! fanfics are better i swear)

I read several HP and FB fanfics during the last few months, and in order to sum up my favourite ones, here is this post. It’s entirely and obviously personal, and to be honest, it’s more something which is more supposed to help me than recommanding something to you

But I truly think those fanfictions are great, so if you didn’t already read them, you may enjoy them!

I might update it every now and then, by the way!

(most of them are already quite well-known though, sorry)

Put Your Guns Away, it’s Tea Time (52k) and Put Your Curse in Reverse (276k) (from the It’s Tea Time serie), written by ellizablue :

A very lovely, funny and well-written story which follows Albus Severus Potter and Scorpius Malfoy, Harry and Ginny Potter, the rest of the Potter-Weasley family and all of the surrounding people after the events of Harry Potter and the Cursed Child.

It’s technically canon-compliant - the author created an amazing story based on HPCC - and did it so well! I admit I was a bit disappointed about HPCC when it had been published, but It’s Tea Time “fixed” all of the things I was confused about.

Albus’ and Scorpius’ relationship is adorable, both of them are interesting characters. Harry and Ginny are amiable and attentive parents, they protect people they love. James Sirius and Lily Luna are also great - and to be honest, all of the characters are refreshing, complex, ect. I could talk about it throughout countless of pages. So many themes are brilliantly treated. I still didn’t read the third opus of the series!

(if I should recommand one only series of HP fanfictions, I would recommand this one)

Several fanfictions written by meanwhiletimely :

Illumine (10k) :

In Prague in 1914, Albus Dumbledore goes to a Gellert Grindelwald’s brillant speech. The political discussion between Albus and Henry Potter, how Gellert is able to enthrall a breathless crowed, Gellert’s and Albus’ very special and intense relationship, the wonderful Christian imagery and parallels, the description of the surrounding world and the ambiance, Gellert’s speech... It is quite marvellous, well-written and perfectly bitter-sweet - more bitter than sweet though. Eventual smut, very good, but imo, it cannot be considered as the very heart of the text, even though the sexual tension is omnipresent. I can't help but read it oftenly, and everytime I'm amazed - it might be my favourite GGAD fanfiction in fact. Brilliant.

Extreme Incantations (10k) :

In order to find clues about the Elder Wand story, Albus and Gellert try a “decadent, degenerate, deranged” ritual. A lot of smut, but again, their relationship and their psychology are absolutely central. I loved how they are portrayed, loved to discover Gellert’s thoughts and point of view. Again, it’s brilliantly bitter-sweet - even quite heartbreaking. Like Illumine, I have so much more to say, but I’ll stop here and just say: if you are interested by Summer of 1899 fanfictions, you could be delighted to discover it.

The Seer in the Tower (2k5) and Collateral (3k) are as great as Illumine and Extreme Incantations. In the first one, Tom Riddle meets Gellert Grindelwald after 1945 ; in the second one, Gellert and Ariana talk thanks the Resurection Stone. Light Bringer (10k), which sums up the Summer of 1899, is also amazing - incredibly painful, hopeless and horrendous, and Gellert Grindelwald is definitely not a good person - but still amazing.

Thirty-Five Owls (11k) by Letterblade :

After 1945, Albus and Gellert sent letters to each other - and I will add nothing more about the plot. A quite famous fanfiction - published in 2008 - and rightfully recognised as a brillant one. Beautifully written, the tag "Everything Hurts" is accurate, constantly breathtaking. I loved more than everything else the end - overwhelming, and yet so simple. Even canon-compliant, what more could we ask? In a nutshell, an unmissable work.

White (2k) (M) by Vandrerska :

“The story Gellert Grindelwald would tell if somebody took the trouble to ask.”, or a magnificiently well-written 1st person POV fic with Gellert talking about Albus and 1899. Here is the same vibe we already have in Thirty-Five Owls, but with the benefit of a heart-to-heart conversation between Gellert and the reader directly. Needless to say that both of the hearts involved in the conversation are broken. I love how it is written (but it is no surprise, well-crafted angsty texts like this one own my heart). 

nobody else but me (5k) by Roflskate :

After meeting Percival Graves and starting a correspondence with the very head of MACUSA's Department of Law Enforcement in 1926, Albus Dumbledore thinks he's finally ready to move on from Gellert Grindelwald. Well, if you saw Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, you know he's not.

I'm fond of the plot: the way we, as readers, already know how that story is doomed to end, is the very heart of the text - and speaking of the end, I loved it - just like Thirty-Five Owls, simple and heartrending. Again, bitterness is back. Beware of the manipulation and the very questionable consent, it's literally the plot.

(btw, this work inspired this post: GG as Hogwarts teacher/librarian before FBaWtFT: where are the fanfics? (if someone wants to write it please i will be pretty happy))

(In every bloody fanfiction I recommend Albus is suffering, sorry about that) (and it's not going to end with the next fanfic) (suffering is inherent to the character though so)

The Trial of Albus Dumbledore (51k) by Aurora_xx :

In this post-FBCoG AU, Albus Dumbledore is questioned about his relations with Gellert Grindelwald. But before his trial, he unknowingly took Veritaserum. To be honest, I felt it first as a “satisfying” AU: people we don’t like became a bit ridiculous, people we like get through (well, mostly).

Nonetheless, it’s more than that: the trial scene is incredibly tense, the consequences are terrible, and we want to see what's going to happen next. Moreover, the character development is suprisingly remarkably well-done - Vinda Rosier has an amazing backstory, for example; Newt and Newt’s friends are also very likeable, complex, etc. We love to hate Travers, Grindelwald is a character we eventually support (for specific reasons, mostly because he’s powerful, self-confident, rather hilarious and badass, but also a bit more human than we could think). And all we want to do is taking care of Albus.

It’s definitely a really pleasant fanfiction - but not an “easy” one, there are a lot of hard themes and very tense scenes, etc. This story is still considered as a WIP, though the five first chapters are already enough. 

Three fics of mautadite :

A Metaphor for Change (1k) (M) : I will just rewrite the summary here, so: "Five things Albus could not bring himself to say to Gellert. (One of them is a lie.)”. I really liked it, it is angsty - but the sweetest way, the very sad way.

To Be Great (0.3k) (G) : What Albus and the Sorting Hat said when Albus put the Hat on his head for the first time. Really a relevant and sharp character study. Again, I felt a hint of a sweet kind of angst. I wonder if I am the only one, you tell me.

Love Letters (6k) (E) : Scenes of Gellert’s and Albus’ life from 1995 to 1899 - often conversations, so say hello to well-crafted relationships between mc and other characters. Here comes the angst again (I think the author writes Albus and Gellert that way - or maybe, the characters are meant to be suffused by angsty undertones). The fact that we go back in time hurts a lot, because every smile they have are perverted by our knowledge of what happens next - the happiness won’t last, and really, it hurts. Canon compliant.

GGAD works of verivala (bloodtroth on tumblr)

Many short one-shots, from fluff to angst - sometimes droll, sometimes soft, often painful, quite always (a bit or a lot) bitter-sweet. You might at least find few of them interesting.

Grindeldore one-shots (22 works)

Grindeldore requests (5 works)

Grindeldore prompt fills (38 works)

L’Indiscible (190k) by Neaniver279

This one is a French one! Deux ans après la fin de la guerre, Percy Weasley - profondément meurtri par la mort de Fred, de laquelle il s’estime responsable - est renvoyé par une mystérieuse potion au 25 décembre 1975. Plusieurs élèves de Poudlard attirent son attention et son affection, voire un en particulier, Sirius Black.

Un pairing très inhabituel qui fonctionne bien ; un Percy Weasley passionnant - faillible, perdu dans ses doutes et sa culpabilité, mais avec une répartie, une malice et une sensibilité hors du commun ; des Maraudeurs et des jumeaux Weasley attachants, avec une personnalité définie et nuancée ; une idée originale géniale, car si le voyage dans le temps ouvre des portes à une nouvelle palette de réflexions et d’expériences pour Percy, il permet aussi d’intégrer un mystère et de la tension autour de la potion, l’Indiscible.

Pas d’underage, mais une relation prof-élève tout de même - tout du moins, pendant un segment de l’histoire. Intéressante, touchante, très drôle, amère, complexe et pathétique. WIP.

Thanks for reading, I hope it had helped!

Thanks to all of the authors also! You are brave, tenacious and doing an amazing work. Thanks a lot! :)

(And of course, beware of the tags, if you are triggered by specific content - homophobia, blood, hospital, violence, explicit sex scenes, manipulation, death, etc)

08-24-2020 edit: Thirty-Five Owls, nobody else but me and verivala’s works added. 02-18-2021 edit: White and mautadite’s works added.

(08-24-2020: i’m also currently interested by Kierkegarden’s works, an already quite inevitable GGAD author, I might add some of them later)

[dumbledore-and-grindelwald]

'I loved you too Dumbledore.' 'I know.'

As one of Dumbledore's biggest fans out there I 've thought of his character and of his relationships a lot... and as a Grindeldore shipper I love the idea of Grindelwald being the love of Dumbledore's life and in a way, on a romantic and sexual level and in terms of partnership, he was. That said, from my point of view Dumbledore's REAL love-story in the HP series is between him and Harry.

 We've seen different kinds of relationships when it comes to Dumbledore.

He loved Grindelwald as a partner in every sense of the word, but Grindelwald was unable to return that love in the same way and to allow it to be the light in his darkness and the sanity to his madness. And even if, as I've speculated, Grindelwald surrendered during the legendary duel and came to some realizations of his own, their timing was off.

He loved Aberforth, Ariana and Kendra (a familial kind of love) but Aberforth distanced himself after Ariana's death and the already existing cracks in their relationship were enhanced while the two women of his life died early and he was left alone and broken.

He loved Minerva and Hagrid and he did see them as friendsi n his way, but while both of them knew aspects of who he was (Minerva more so than Hagrid), neither had experienced Dumbledore's darkest parts. The ones that he was ashamed of and that defined his actions throughout his life.

And then there was Dumbledore's love for Harry. The love that snuck up on him; the one that he had not intended to feel. The kind of love that a father feels for his son, which he tried to deny...

DUMBLEDORE: Harry, don’t you think I wanted to fight him on your behalf? I would have spared you if

I could —

HARRY: “Love blinds us”? Do you even know what that means? Do you even know how bad that advice

was? My son is — my son is fighting battles for us just as I had to for you. And I have proved as bad a father to him as you were to me. Leaving him in places he felt unloved — growing in him resentments he’ll take years to understand —

DUMBLEDORE: If you’re referring to Privet Drive, then —

HARRY: Years — years I spent there alone, without knowing what I was, or why I was there, without knowing that anybody cared!

DUMBLEDORE: I — did not wish to become attached to you —

HARRY: Protecting yourself, even then!

DUMBLEDORE: No. I was protecting you. I did not want to hurt you . . .

DUMBLEDORE attempts to reach out of the portrait — but he can’t. He begins to cry but tries to hide it. But I had to meet you in the end . . . eleven years old, and you were so brave. So good. You walked uncomplainingly along the path that had been laid at your feet. Of course I loved you . . . and I knew that it would happen all over again . . . that where I loved, I would cause irreparable damage. I am no fit person to love . . . I have never loved without causing harm.

Dumbledore did everything he could to ensure Harry's survival but he also tried to timid his love because to his experience love tended to cloud his judgment and he ended up hurting and destroying the people he love. He tried to keep his distance and to be a mentor more than a parental figure; a failed fit because of Harry being starved for love, for being treated with respect by the adults who were responsible for him and of his appreciation of Dumbledore as a man worthy to look up to.

However, Dumbledore was wrong. This distance, this net of protection that he tried to keep in place was exactly what ended up hurting Harry and affecting him even as an adult:

HARRY: You would have hurt me less if you had told me this then.

DUMBLEDORE (openly weeping now): I was blind. That is what love does. I couldn’t see that you needed to hear that this closed-up, tricky, dangerous old man . . . loved you.

A pause. The two men are overcome with emotion.

HARRY: It isn’t true that I never complained.

DUMBLEDORE: Harry, there is never a perfect answer in this messy, emotional world. Perfection is beyond the reach of humankind, beyond the reach of magic. In every shining moment of happiness is that drop of poison: the knowledge that pain will come again. Be honest to those you love, show your pain. To suffer is as human as to breathe.

HARRY: You said that to me once before.

DUMBLEDORE: It is all I have to offer you tonight.

He begins to walk away.

HARRY: Don’t go!

DUMBLEDORE: Those that we love never truly leave us, Harry. There are things that death cannot touch. Paint . . . and memory . . . and love.

 Dumbledore's last lesson is the thing that he did not manage to deal with his entire life: That pain, imperfection and one's mistakes were something to be dealt with rather than to be hidden from the world. Things that could be understood and overcome through the forgiveness that comes with love.

And ironically, this last lesson was taught to him by Harry himself; by Harry who saw his darkness, who saw the way that Dumbledore  hurt him in and despite his bitterness and his trauma did not stop loving and trusting him. Harry who questioned him but never lost faith in him. Harry who carried him with him even when he was gone from the world.

HARRY: I loved you too, Dumbledore.

DUMBLEDORE: I know.

 This line has been criticized by many as Dumbledore being smug. This is not the case though. Dumbledore has already expressed his love for Harry in this scene. What we have here is Dumbledore getting closure, or rather the reader/audience getting closure in terms of Dumbledore's story. Through the last fragment that represents Dumbledore in the living world we get the sense that, finally, Dumbledore knows that he is loved; flaws and all. Not just that he knows; but that he has been told so... that he lives on through Harry's unconditional love.

 The immortality that this love provides him with is not by any means the character's absolution, but it is definitely his catharsis.

[grindeldoresongs]

When We Were Young

So continuing with the ‘oh this song reminds of Grindeldore! Let’s go and describe the music video going on in my head!’ theme:

Song: When We Were Young

(This one is very long- hnnnn-)

Lyrics: Dumbledore, Grindelwald, both

^it doesn’t make sense all the time but whatever.

Also anyone who actually reads though all of this: ich liebe dichhhhhh

And sorry if it gets a bit less music video like at some parts, and I’m sorry for that- I should just make a song fic.

Everybody loves the things you do

While alone, Gellert thinks of how highly people speak of Dumbledore. He’s middle aged in this scene, and has yet to go to prison. He remembers how his great aunt spoke of the boy next door (cliches ;))

From the way you talk

He remembers how he too admired Dumbledore. The way he spoke was captivating to Gellert while both young and middle aged.

To the way you move

A flashback occurs, and we’re taken to another empty field, where the two are sitting underneath an oak tree, staring deeply into each other’s eyes. There’s a swift movement, then Albus’ lips are on Gellert’s.

Everybody here is watching you

We’re taken back to reality just as Grindelwald is. He looks at a new article about Albus... This reminds him Albus exists even outside his memories, and that hurts him. He tries his best not to show it though.

'Cause you feel like home

We’re taken to the barn, where they’re sprawled across some hay, closer than ever. They look peaceful, and they drift to sleep.

You're like a dream come true

Now we transition to young Albus opening his beautiful blue eyes. He sees Gellert. This is his dream come true- for the time being.

But if by chance you're here alone

He recalls the first time they’d met. He’d been invited over for supper or at least some tea with Ms. Bagshot, and he was alone with Gel as the owner of the house went to grab something quickly.

Can I have a moment

Tea time is over and Gellert walks Albus to the door, because of his great aunt of course.

Before I go?

Before Albus leaves he stares into Gellert’s eyes, hoping he doesn’t mind. Albus is just...very intrigued. The scene though looks a little bit like Albus looking up after having stared at the ground for long to avoid looking the taller boy in the eye. Then he stares.

'Cause I've been by myself all night long

It’s a bit after their first encounter and Albus is laying alone in his room, staring at the ceiling and the Phoenix flying about, when he hears a knock on his door.

Hoping you're someone I used to know

He looks out and it’s Gellert. He has a book in hand- seems Albus had forgotten it at their place.

You look like a movie

We finally get to see who’s remembering all of this, and we see it’s middle aged Dumbledore. He’s staring at what used to be his house back at Godric’s Hollow. He sees the very spot Gel used to climb into their house from. He thinks their past must’ve been fiction...it was so...perfect. Straight out of a movie!

You sound like a song

We get taken to the memory Dumbledore has of Gellert raving about the Hallows. He remembered how captivated he was. Every word hooked him more. Now we see a middle aged Gellert, touching the Hallows pendant.

My God, this reminds me

Back to Albus, as he smiles sadly at the ground.

Of when we were young

They’re in the forest now, with some parchment, some books and a quill.

Let me photograph you in this light

Dumbledore thinks of how much more he would’ve cherished his time as a happy teenager if he knew what would become of him and the man he...well...loved.

In case it is the last time

His mind brings him (and us) back to the last time they were happy. Before the duel. Before Ariana’s death.

That we might be exactly like we were

We see the duel. Magic everywhere.

Before we realized

Slow motion almost, as spells after spells are casted.

We were sad of getting old

Spells are still flying...but it’s a good 30 or so years later. Aberforth is out of the picture- but not in the way Gellert wanted- at the beginning at least.

It made us restless

Spells.

It was just like a movie

As Dumbledore casts a hex, he remembers their pointless duels in the mid afternoon sun.

It was just like a song

Gellert remembers the books they would read out loud.

I was so scared to face my fears

Albus remembers the first time he heard of Grindelwald as the ‘dark lord.’ He’s mortified.

Nobody told me that you'd be here

We see the pain in Dumbledore when he realizes he’s the only one who can stop this madness he used to support; for the ‘greater good.’

And I swear you moved overseas

It’s the day after Albus buried his sister...he expected Gellert to come back...to apologize. To try and justify his actions...to make Albus believe again.

That's what you said, when you left me

But no. He was gone.

You still look like a movie

The middle aged teacher Dumbledore also remembers seeing the papers about Grindy again after a while. ‘Oh how he’d changed...’

You still sound like a song

Dumbledore is now among the crowd- listening to Grindelwald’s speech. His voice is still so...

My God, this reminds me

A pang of nostalgia hits him as he leaves the room- not able to take this.

Of when we were young

Grindelwald sees that someone has gone- actually he knows it’s Albus. He had been the only one among the crowd to gain eye contact with Gellert during the beginning of his speech.

He hesitates for a moment- maybe too. He’s thinking of when Albus would disap(p?)erate into thin air to somewhere in Godric’s Hollow. Then Gellert would have to try to find him.

He goes back- a bit disgruntled, to the speech. The words ‘greater good’ suddenly don’t feel so good in his mouth.

Let me photograph you in this light

Dumbledore has disaperated to Hogwarts. He’s trying to forget what he saw...trying to hold on to the perfect past.

In case it is the last time

He thinks about the past...yes...he dwells on it. It’s almost like a dream.

That we might be exactly like we were

He wants to see it again. He wants to be there. He wants to be the 18 year old Hogwarts graduate in the summer of 1899. He goes to the pensive.

Before we realized

He dumps memories and memories into the peculiar thing. We go through flashes of all of them. We see how much they’d changed over the years. From the shy neighbours, to the friends, to the lovers, to the strangers...to the greatest rivals.

We were sad of getting old

As the years go by in the pensive; the older Dumbledore gets, the worse his life seems to be.

It made us restless

His eyes are pained. He wants to make it better. He knows he needs to face Grindelwald...but for now....he can’t. He won’t.

It was just like a movie

Middle aged Dumbledore closes his eyes, and we’re taken away to the green field again. In the background of the field, we see the abandoned barn, but everything is focused on the two boys, now standing. The shorter of the two is laughing, pointing his wand at the other, who is smirking- but he looks just as amused.

It was just like a song

The incantations coming out of their mouths flow as naturally as an ‘I love you,’ maybe...

When we were young x4

More sweet and unrealistic memories flash by us.

It's hard to admit that

We stop the flashes at the scene where Albus is holding hands with Gellert in the field, but then one last flash...Albus is alone, in the rain. He’s in the same place though, in the exact same position. Nothing seemed to have changed for Albus- but the world had moved on. This is symbolic in a way.

Everything just takes me back

Now it’s still raining, and we see a pair of feet walking on cobblestone. Then we flash to a time where it was sunny; summer no doubt. The same feet are shown, but now they’re accompanied by another pair. The two seem to be walking in step.

To when you were there

We zoom in on how their hands brush against each other.

To when you were there

Slowly...the first pair of feet we saw disappear. Now the weather seems to be darker as well. The streets change...but the feet are the same.

And a part of me keeps holding on

Now we can see what’s in the man’s hands. It’s a book... then wrapped around his other hand is a necklace. One with the infamous Deathy Hallows pendant on it.

Just in case it hasn't gone

We now fill on see Grindelwald, he is walking through Paris, rather aimlessly- but he walks by a shoppe window and looks to see his reflection maybe...and then the strangest thing happens. He sees...Dumbledore? He blinks- he’s gone.

I guess I still care

He realizes he hasn’t moved on yet.

Do you still care?

The stupid thought runs around through his mind, and we’re taken back to Dumbledore- who definitely still cares.

It was just like a movie

Now from Dumbledore’s window we’re taken over mountains and through time essentially to the two star gazing.

It was just like a song

Gellert ranting about the constellations as Albus falls asleep on his shoulder.

My God, this reminds me

We now only see the stars, then the camera (our perspective rather) is downwards again, only the boys aren’t there. No. It’s Gellert; under the quiet Parisian streets.

Of when we were young

You can see the nostalgia in his lighter eye and pain in the other.

When we were young x4

He starts walking back to his headquarters. He’s trying to think of why this is for the greater good and why thinking about the past this often is bad! Grindy is breaking down just a bit, consumed with emotions he’d locked away years ago.

Let me photograph you in this light

He stops, the memories and feels ambushing him seemed to have finally driven him over the edge. He’s in the middle of the road, but he doesn’t care. He’s looking up at the moon, remembering.

In case it is the last time

The night right before he left for Germany...when Albus had thought he’d already gone. Gellert, looked through the window he’d entered through all those years ago, and sighed. He would never be able to come back...from what he could tell. He touched the bricks once more, then disaperated.

That we might be exactly like we were

We see young Grindelwald in Germany, he seems to have it all under control, but every little flower and every blade of grass(!!!) reminds him of how he spent his summer.

Before we realized

Gellert stops himself- this time in the past.

We were sad of getting old

That last scene was the parallel of the one where Albus was alone in the rain, holding his hand up. Gellert slowly puts his up too...as if maybe someone would reach out and grab it. In our perspective, the frames are side by side, so it seems like they’re touching, even if they aren’t. Gellert is the first to pull his hand away. He then walks in the other direction, leaving Albus behind. Then with every step he takes, he gets older. Older...

It made us restless

Older..now Dumbledore is finally walking away...slowly. He too is aging with every step.

Oh, I'm so mad I'm getting old

We follow Dumbledore out of Godric’s Hollow into Hogwarts. His pants get replaced by robes...he’s old now. Very old.

It makes me reckless

He is looking into the mirror of Erised now...tormented by what he still sees.

It was just like a movie

He sees the fields again. Them running- or rather Albus running away from Gellert, only to be tackled

It was just like a song

He remembers their laughter, and we see it. We can only imagine how happy and pure the laughter sounds like...

When we were young

We’re taken back to Dumbledore’s perspective as an old man. We zoom in on the blue of his eyes. As the word ‘young’ comes about, we see the picture of young Gel and Al in old Dumbledore’s eyes fade away. Dumbledore closes his eyes and everything goes black.

Then a quote appears: “

//////

So this ist the second one and uh if anyone wants to do this- that would be near impossible, then yay please doooo, and tag me or something? So I can see it lmao, I need this and so many more. Sorry though if this is trash to you- I made almost all of this on the spot this time (oops). To be fair I didn’t think the song would be this long. (Also; don’t mind my mistakes with tenses.) But yea so I had the chorus in mind and whatever but then the rest was like Ooft.

[judgmentalfishnun]

I hope you don't mind some more grindeldore HC! I kind of think that Albus was more likely to be a bottom when he was younger. As you said sexual attraction is very rare for him, and when he meets Gellert he realises how much he craves to be touched, and he also lacks human warmth because of his family situation, where he almost certainly lacks affection. Also, he trusts Gellert 100% and feels safe around him, so he likes to let go and lets Gellert take care of him, making him forget (continues)

(Cont.) for a while about the weight on his shoulders, and what he has to face once he goes back home; he’s just 18 after all. That’s why I think he would most likely bottom when he was younger, but not once he grows up. If he ever gets to see Gellert after that summer, he would certainly top. He has aged, he never had another sexual partner besides Gellert (not that he didn’t try, but they just weren’t /him/), he still feels guilty for what happened to Ariana, he’s angry at Gellert for leaving

(Cont.)him, he doesn’t approve of his methods, and he’s just very bitter and frustrated in general for a lot of reasons. I think that he would let all these feelings flow during sex, so it would be kind of rough (but not too much because he still loves him), and he would definitely be very dominant. Gellert has the time of his life because Albus just fucks his brains out and leaves him breathless. Well, that was a lot, I hope you don’t mind. If you ever want to chat about grindeldore, hit me up!

Of course I don’t mind!! 8)

Yes, Albus craving that comfort and abdication of control makes a lot of sense for the space he’s in that summer. An element of grindeldore that I love in any ‘verse is the idea that Albus, who everyone expects to be the one to take charge and do all of the leading/protecting, has no one who can comfort and protect him except for Gellert. It’s an amazing feeling for him to have an equal he can trust that way.

I LOVE the idea of post-1899 Albus fucking Gellert senseless, just taking everything out on him and pouring all of that pain and anger into it. (Gellert is terrified but also has one of the best orgasms of his life.) Gellert adores this side of Albus, but this is admittedly not how he had hoped to bring it out.

[daydreamclarial]

The Crimes of Grinderwald - Review (Spoilers)

I don't usually do reviews but this one is a must for me. Perhaps I will find people who feel the same as me. I had high expectations for this movie. I hadn't thoroughly enjoyed the first, maybe because of the huge impact of Harry Potter movies on me.

Let's adress first what I need to talk about the most:

- Starting at the beggining, I couldn't believe my eyes with the love potion storyline. The other day I heard Margaret Atwood talk about how even if you write an historic novel, you can never fully write it in the past accurately because you live in the present. So you need to represent the present in the past. What I mean is HOW can JK be so out of touch with #metoo and the consent talk and make Queenie give Jacob a love potion?! I mean because he is in love makes itok? Like consent isn't needed in a relationship as well?? C'mon, that was painful to watch. Is Queenie that desperate to get married?

No.

And I am all in favor for her joining Grinderwald, that was surprising but made sense since he is a seer too and is manipulating her for sure.

- Johnny Depp gets too much screen time. Yu. It could be used for, say, Leta or Tina. I wasn't thrilled at that sequence at the beginning. I liked the Pere Lachaise scene of course, that was necessary for the story.

- Thirdly, how come there is no opiniated female characters vital to the story, such as Hermione, Tonks or McGonagall? (I mean, I know McGonagall is in for like three seconds). Because hey, Tina was there just for Newt, she hardly did anything except get arrested and get a love confession. In a shocking choice, we didn't even see Tina react to her sister joining Grinderwald?????! Wtf David Yates?!

Which leads me to my favorite character in this movie, Leta.

- Leta Lestrange was the character I needed. She has everything the others lack. She has a painful past, being the product of the Imperius curse on her mother. That was hard to watch and moved me. The consent theme is problematic in this movie though. She has great scenes. Zoe is a fantastic actress. I feel for Leta. So HOW COME THEY KILLED HER? The best female character in this franchise! Theseus should have died, come on, but no, she was killed to add to the arc of the male characters, the Scamander brothers. I was so sure Theseus was going to die before watching the movie.

- Oh and now the very, very bad. Nagini. Barely two lines. Adds absolutely nothing to the story, if she wasn't there nothing would be lost. Which is diservice to the character and the actress.

- The Virgo in me will presently complain about the time innaccuracies and THAT finale.

So, let's get down to business.

Aurelius aka Credence can’t be the son of Percival or Kendra Dumbledore. Acording to Ezra Miller, his character was 18 in the first movie (1926), which means he was probably born in 1908. Percival has been in Azkaban since 1891, and it’s very unlikely for to have had a children white in prision. Kendra died in 1899, the same year Ariana did, 9 years before Credence was even born.

HOW THE HELL IS HE A DUMBLEDORE?

Of course Grindelwald could be talking to the Obscurus, that came from Ariana. As we know, an obscurus is a parasite, so it could have scaped Ariana’s body after her death. But how did it find Credence, if he was born much time after her death?

Or did Albus and Gellert kept the Obscurus? But if Gellert did, how did he not know it was Credence?

Is this the truth and Grindelwald gives him the name of Aurelius Dumbledore to create some sort of resentment towards Albus in Credence? I mean the phoenix is there as proof and leaves me very confused. Is he not a brother but just a relative of Albus? But how are they explaining that?

There is however a terrifying possibility. Is the former perfectionist JK Rowling shitting on timelines?? Because McGonagall is in this movie even though she isn't even born until 1938.

THIS IS VERY DISAPPOINTING INDEED.

And now for the aspects I liked:

- Newt of course is still a precious baby.

- His creatures are precious babies. I loved those scenes and the ones with Bunty.

- Like I said, all things Leta Lestrange.

- Jude Law was flawless as Dumbledore. I need to see more.

- Love scenes between Tina and Newt (although Tina needs more autonomy amd more lines in the next movie. She is just a puppet in this one).

- I am a big Grindeldore stan. That HAND IN HAND SCENE. YES. And listen: that scene felt appropriate since in the HP franchise we barely saw kisses, except Harry and his girls and Ron/Hermione. The other couple was Tonks and Lupin who never show PDA. So, I am extremely satisfied with this scene. It was lovely.

- Paris. <3

- HOGWARTS!!! <3

They need to increase the pace and the drama in the next one. I am hoping they fix the problems with this one and give more action to Tina, Nagini and Queenie. And more Albus/Gellert please.

[hallowsnothorcruxes]

Grindeldore prompt: Gellert opening up/showing his vulnerable side to Albus

“Gellert, can I ask you something?” Albus asked one night, as they were lying together in bed. Albus had propped his head on one hand and was drawing signs on his chest.

Slowly Gellert opened his eyes and looked at him. “You just did, didn’t you?” Albus’ hand stopped and he smiled. “Go on.”

“These scars, where did you get them?” Albus’ fingers were tracing the white lines on his shoulder now and he sighed. “Not that question.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Why?”

He sighed again. “Albus…” He didn’t want to tell Albus. It was not important anyway. He spent most of his nights trying not to think about it and much less did he want to discuss it again. “Because it is not important.”

“It looks painful,” Albus said, but Gellert remained silent. “You know everything about me,” Albus went on after a while, his fingers were stroking the burned mark on his ribcage now.

Of course Albus wouldn’t just leave it. He was too curious for that and too much in love with him. It had already took him longer to ask than Gellert had anticipated. This was a weak attempt at manipulation, although Albus probably wasn’t even aware of it. He just spoke his mind as always when they were together. He was sure that Albus would never consciously try to pressure him, he was way too noble and sweet for that, but he hadn’t let it go the first time Gellert had denied him an answer and that meant that he really wanted to know this time.

“They are from my mother, alright?” He answered, a bit more harshly than he had intended.

“Your mother?” Albus looked irritated.

“Yes. I didn’t have the picture-book childhood you had,” he snapped. He knew that was a weak spot for Albus, but he didn’t really know why he was bringing it up now.

Albus glared at him. “Picture-book childhood?”

“Until that incident,” he conceded. “You had your mother and your father and a sister and a brother and a pretty house in a small town. And you all loved each other, your parents didn’t even beat you. That’s what I meant.”

“And what did your mother do?”

He had never told anybody. There had never been anyone to tell. When he had been very young he had tried to tell Gerda - the old lady, who had given his mother work and a flat and had convinced her to keep him - what had happened the night before, but that had just resulted in another beating from his mother, after Gerda had talked to her about it.

It was a strange feeling, thinking about it. It still felt so unfair, it made him so angry. His mother was weak, because she had let others, even muggles, dictate her life. But she had still managed to hurt him, who was far more powerful, and that was not something he was proud of. That was, why he had never told anyone in school or his aunt. He was not weak like that. But Albus knew him. He was the only one, who understood him. It was weird, he had never wanted to let anyone get close to him, there had never even been a temptation to change that, but Albus was different. He was already closer to him than anyone had ever been before. He didn’t even know how that had happened.

Out of an impulse, he took Albus’ hand and layed it down on the burn scar. “I think I was four or five. We often had soup for dinner. One night it was so hot, I burned my mouth, when I took the first spoon and spit it out over the table. My mother was very angry, she spilled the rest of the soup on me as a punishment.” He pulled Albus’ hand up to his shoulder. “I was sick, I couldn’t sleep. I kept coughing, although I was supposed to sleep. I tried not to, but - I was six. My mother came into my room, she wanted me to stop, said she couldn’t sleep. She pushed me down into the bed so hard she scratched me. I suppose it wouldn’t look like that if it had been treated and hadn’t become infected.”

“Gellert,” Albus whispered.

“There were other times. When I was young, I thought it was my fault. I tried to be good. She dressed me up, sometimes, paraded me around. Seldom, though - she doesn’t have many friends. It was… confusing.” He turned his head to look Albus in the eyes. “That’s why I’m here. She wouldn’t let me come back home, after my expulsion.”

Albus put a hand on his cheek. “I’m so sorry,” he murmured.

“Don’t look at me like that.”

“Like what?”

“I don’t want pity. I don’t care about it anymore, as I said, it is not important.”

“I don’t pity you,” Albus replied seriously. “I admire you.”

Gellert looked at him in irritation.

“Because that sounds horrible and you still managed to become a wonderful man,” Albus explained.

A warm feeling spread in his stomach and he took Albus’ hand again. He pulled him in and kissed him deeply.

“I love you, Gellert,” he said and Gellert thought that, maybe, Albus really was different.

[hallowsnothorcruxes]

Grindeldore prompt: Hanahaki disease?

Albus didn’t get sick often. His mother had always claimed that was due to his growing up on the country side, but Albus wasn’t entirely convinced of that.

Nonetheless, he was very surprised, when he suddenly started coughing without any warning, without any symptoms of a flu or a cold. And even more so, when he found his mouth full of deep red rose petals.

At first, he ignored it. Telling himself it was just a strange coincidence - some uncontrolled magic or a joke - and tried not to think about how that was hardly possible.

“What spell is that?” Gellert asked two days later, when Albus coughed up petals for the third time in ten minutes. Albus had really preferred not to talk about it, not to think about it, but Gellert eyed him so curiously that Albus just couldn’t bring himself to lie to him.

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?” Gellert raised an eyebrow.

Albus shrugged. “It’s none of my spells. I thought maybe you or Aberforth jinxed me or it’s some uncontrolled magic.”

“You’re coughing up petals for how long now?”

“Two days.”

“And you don’t care to find out why?”

Albus coughed again, spilling petals in his lap and the small pond they were sitting at. “I told you, it’s probably just one of Aberforth’s jokes”, he said defiantly.

Gellert looked at him skeptically, but Albus smiled: “It’s nothing.”

But it wasn’t nothing. Three more days passed, the coughing increased in intensity and frequency, breathing became harder and when he met Gellert, he sometimes had to cough so much that he found the petals covered in blood. By now, even Aberforth was sincerely worried and Albus convinced that it couldn’t be his brother, who had jinxed him.

He was curious indeed, who could’ve done that to him, unnoticed, but he couldn’t think of anyone except for Gellert, who seemed too worried and too curious himself.

In the end, Bathilda Bagshot was the one to solve the mystery.

It was late afternoon already, Albus and Gellert were sitting at the Dumbledore’s kitchen table, trying to focus on an old map of Europe, - which proved hardly possible, since Albus couldn’t stop coughing up petals - while Ariana and Aberforth were playing with the goats in the backyard.

When they heard someone knocking on the door, Gellert went to get it, since Albus almost seemed to collapse from lack of oxygen with every step he took.

Bathilda entered the kitchen with a heavy, old book in her arms and squeezed his shoulder sympathetically.

“How are you feeling, Albus?” She asked, concerned, sitting down at the table.

“I’m alright.” He coughed again, when Gellert sat back down next to him. Bathilda’s face grew even more serious.

“I think I found the reason for your condition.”

Albus and Gellert looked at her in surprise. “Really?” Gellert asked. He had tried very hard to find a spell or a jinx that would cause a person to cough up petals, but everything he found didn’t completely apply to Albus symptoms.

“Yes.”

“What is it?” Albus asked.

Bathilda looked over at Gellert. “Leave us for a moment, would you?”

Gellert frowned. “No. I want to know.”

“I think this is personal.”

“He’s my best friend.”

“He can stay”, Albus interrupted. Bathilda met his eyes and sighed. “Very well.” She opened the book, looke through the pages and finally, turned it around so that Albus could read. Gellert leaned in to look over his shoulder.

“Hanahaki Disease”, he read. “An illness born from unrequited love.”

Albus just sat there, frozen, staring at the book in front of him, while Gellert’s mind still seemed to process the information.

“Who are you in love with?” He asked after a long moment of silence.

Albus closed his eyes, coughing up a whole load of blood covered petals. Gellert passed him the bucket that they collected them in and Albus held on to it like a drowning man.

He felt like he was drowning or suffocating and if it was true, what the book said, that was the case, indeed. He was being suffocated by his feelings. He swallowed hard, tried to get the metal taste of blood and spring out of his mouth and ran a hand over his face, trying to wipe away the dampness of his eyes unnoticed.

As if loving his friend wasn’t bad enough itself. As if he wasn’t suffering enough already, trying to hide his admiration, his love, trying to act normal around him, trying very hard, not to give anything away… now it was quite literally killing him.

“Is there a cure?” He asked, looking at Bathilda. He hated how hoarse his voice sounded.

Bathilda took his hand sympathetically. “I talked to an old friend, he is a healer at St Mungo’s and he said he’s seen some people with this illness. He said they can remove the flowers, but that will remove all emotions, too.”

Albus looked horrified, shaking his head automatically. No emotions. No feelings. No love, no friendship, no joy, no sorrow even. How was anyone supposed to live like that?

“He said, the flowers will also disappear if the beloved person reciprocates your love.”

At that Gellert clapped his hands so suddenly that Albus startled. “Well, problem solved!”

“What?” He really tried not to sound hopeful, not to feel hopeful, but he couldn’t help it. He just stared at Gellert with wide eyes.

“You just need to get whoever it is to fall in love with you. Won’t be too hard, you’re the great Albus Dumbledore and I’ll help you.”

He wasn’t sure, if Gellert could see in his eyes how his world crumbled from the intensity of pain and hopelessness that overcame him. He couldn’t say anything, his throat felt too tight, his chest ached and his eyes burned, so he just folded his arms on the table and hid his face in them.

He tried to keep his body from shaking, while tears spilled into the sleeves of his shirt.

*

They had left him, when he had asked them to. He didn’t want company, he couldn’t bear Gellert’s company. So he had dragged himself up to his room, closed the curtains and curled himself up in his bed, trying to shut out the world and everything in it.

He woke up in the middle of the night, from the sickening, frightening feeling of choking. He felt like no air could reach his lungs or escape it. His pillow was already covered in red petals and when he sat up and gagged, trying to get more petals out of his pipe, he sprinkled his linens in blood as well. Desperately he coughed and gagged, but all that left his throat were strangled cries and he felt more and more faint the more time passed.

“Albus?” That was Aberforth’s voice and only a second later, his brother was by his side, clapping his back and holding back his hair.

Just when he thought he was going to pass out and die, he threw up another blood stained load of petals, coughed a few more times and felt how he could finally breathe again.

He desperately gasped for air and finally collapsed into his brother’s arms, shaking and sweating.

“You can’t die”, Aberforth said firmly.

“I don’t want to”, he confessed.

“You can’t. We need you. You need to let them take it out.”

“You heard?”

“‘Course I did.”

“I won’t be of any use if I can’t feel anything.”

“Yes you will. And if it’s just on paper. If you die, they will take Ariana away, take her to St Mungo’s and Merlin knows where I’ll end up.” He paused, then said: “Tell him. You’ve got nothing to lose.”

“You know?”

Aberforth rolled his eyes. “Everyone knows. And he’s either even more stupid than I thought or pretending not to know.”

“I’ve got our friendship to lose.”

“Which you can’t be sad about then, anymore. You have to try. I can’t take care of two sick people.”

Albus nodded slowly. “I’m sorry”, he whispered.

“I know”, Aberforth said, rubbing his back, when Albus coughed again. “I’m sorry, too. It sucks. I’ll punch him, if you want.”

Albus smiled, but shook his head. “Thank you.” He hesitated. “I’m sorry, I’m not always the brother you need.”

*

“Listen”, Gellert said when they met the next day. They were sitting on Albus’ bed, since he could hardly leave his room, due to his laboured breathing. “I don’t know.”

“What?”

“I don’t know how I feel about you”, he admitted.

“Explain.”

Gellert’s jaw clenched and he avoided looking at Albus. “I’m not like you. I don’t know love.” He said the last word as if he felt personally offended by it. “You love your siblings and your friends and you loved your parents and you’re kind and you care. I don’t. I don’t know my father, I hate my mother, I don’t have friends and I certainly don’t care about anyone else I’ve ever met. They’re usually dull and stupid and they bore me. But you know all of that.” He fidgeted with his hands, now looking defiant. “You’re an exception. You’re brilliant. I want to be friends with you. I like you more than any other person. I just don’t know if I can even feel something like love.”

“You don’t need to say that, you know.”

“I wouldn’t bother, if I didn’t mean it. I know it’s not my fault, even though I highly dislike the situation.”

Albus nodded. “And what do we do now?”

“We try.”

“We do?” Albus looked at him in disbelief.

“The worst that can happen is that nothing changes, right?” He met Albus’ eyes. “Or I might fall in love with you.” Slowly, he reached out, took Albus’ hand and intertwined their fingers.