#but it's gotten SO BAD RECENTLY and now THIS

[starrihan]

My Youth is Free - Toxic! Boynextdoor Break Up Scenarios

-> Pairing: afab! Reader x toxic! Boynextdoor

-> Plot: toxic breakup scenarios for each of the members

-> Genre: angst, suggestive (only some, not WH), Sungho and riwoo are misogynistic and controlling, riwoo is a manipulator, Taesan is really cold, anger issues in woonhak’s, fwb! Leehan, Leehan and Taesan are assholes, reader is blunt and swears a lot, use of real names (Sanghyeok, Dongmin, and Donghyun)

-> Warnings: misogyny, swearing

-> Word Count: 5,935 (~800-1200 words per member)

-> Notes: toxic bnd is all that’s been on my mind recently but let me know if you would like a part 2 where they make up with reader 🤭

-> Side Note: I get a lot of my inspirations from songs (like 1 or 2 lines from a song) and obviously 20 was the inspiration for this one but I always forget to link the song in case someone doesn’t know it 🤦🏽‍♀️ so here is a little edit with the song added anyways enjoy reading~ 😚

༄ ༄ ༄

Sungho:

He couldn't stand the thought of you getting closer to your male coworker. You had recently gotten a new job that required you to work a little later than he did. Sometimes you’d have so much work to do that you’d bring it home to work on, not having had enough time during the workday to get important documents and files finished before their deadline. When you told him that you would be working on a project with a male coworker he was supportive, at first. Of course you guys had total trust in each other, so he didn’t mind you needing to stay later in the office to work with him. But even after your joint project was over, you would still hang out regularly amongst other coworkers. This is what got under his skin.

“You know he wants you, right?”

“Sungho, please. We’re going out with a couple of friends too. I only mentioned his name because you’ve met him before.”

“And the whole time we hung out he was eyeing you down like a piece of candy. C’mon Y/N, seriously? The only reason a guy would hang out with a group of girls is because he wants one of them. You told me that he doesn’t really know the other girls so he’s only going out because you’re there.”

“Yeah, because I’m introducing him to them. I’m the department head so he worked with me but he should know the other people in my department if we’re going to be working together.”

“Im just saying, why would he hang out with you if he didn’t like you?”

“Excuse me? You don’t think I’m fun or interesting enough to hang out with a guy? You think men would only hang out with me because they want to sleep with me?”

“Baby, that’s not what I meant I–”

“Save it. I’m leaving. I’ll be back by 11.”

That was the first conversation of many that led to the break up. It got to a point where you would tell him you were going out and he’d automatically assume you were hanging out with the coworker, throwing a snarky, “don’t come back if you smell like him,” at you before you bitterly slam the door in his face. Until one night you had a work party and you didn’t invite Sungho to come with you, not even mentioning it to him. He only found out because your friends had posted about it.

“So were you ever going to tell me about this? Why didn’t you invite me to come with you?”

Sungho shows you his phone screen with your friend’s post before slamming it on the table. 

“You’ve been so insufferable and insecure whenever I bring up anything work-related. If I invited you out tonight you would’ve punched the guy in the face when you saw him.”

“And why is that so bad, huh, Y/N? You don’t want me to punch your boy toy now?”

“PARK SUNGHO HE IS NOT MY BOY TOY AND YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO SPEAK TO ME THAT WAY, UNDERSTOOD?”

You angrily throw down your stuff, marching up to him. 

“I haven’t done anything. He hasn’t done anything. WE haven’t done anything so why can't you believe me and move on from the fact that I have a male friend? Are you that insecure about me leaving you when I’ve never done anything to betray your trust? Do I mean that little to you that you won't even give me the benefit of the doubt?”

Tears are slowly making their way down your face as you try to wipe them away before smudging your makeup. His expression softens, not realizing how far he’d let his jealousy come.

“Y/N I–”

“Save it, Sungho. You clearly don’t respect me or trust me. I’ll be back later to get some of my things. I’ll stay with my parents until you can figure your shit out. Call me when you’ve gotten some sense back.”

Anger, shock, disbelief. Sungho couldn’t believe that he had let this get so out of hand. Why was he so jealous in the first place? You guys still hung out and had dates every week and you were right; you never gave him any reason to doubt your loyalty to him. 

He’d spend the next few days figuring out what it is he wants but more than that, he just wanted to give you your space. You didn’t want to leave so abruptly like that, but his toxic behaviors were driving you mad. Every time he’d spew some bullshit about you and your coworker you’d want to punch him in the face. You needed to give Sungho the time and space to figure out what his problem was, but more than anything you just wanted to be back in his arms. 

༄ ༄ ༄

Riwoo:

When you first met Riwoo, it took him some time to get used to your bubbly and outgoing personality. You loved being out and having fun and partying, while he preferred to stay at home. It never bothered you that he didn’t always want to go out with you and it never bothered him that you would always want to go out. It would cause some small tiffs between you two about where date night would take place that week, but other than that, there were no issues with your opposing lifestyles. But somewhere along the way, his attitude about your friends and your constant outings had changed. He would fight it more often, using lame excuses that you would take to avoid any more fighting. 

“I heard you’re going out with her (your friend) tonight?”

“Oh yeah, she invited me out after an argument she had with her boyfriend. We’re just going to the food stands so she can vent, nothing crazy.”

“Well, I heard she got into a fight with him because she was showing herself off to other men?”

“I mean, it is summer and she was at the beach? It’s not like she was 'showing herself off to other men,' she just wanted to wear a swimsuit. But apparently there's more to it she’s going to tell me about tonight.”

You were a little taken aback at his statement, not having expected him to find a problem with a woman wearing a bathing suit or moreso, using such a demeaning phrase against another woman, especially at the insinuation of wanting another man’s attention. 

He just rolled his eyes and you both awkwardly sat there, until you broke the silence, telling him that you'd be leaving now and that you'd be back later. 

Letting the rest of the evening play out, you came back with food for Riwoo, hoping that whatever he was saying earlier was just a result of him being hungry or having an off day and you knew food always made him feel better. 

“Honey! I brought you some food!”

You expect him to come running like he usually does when you bring home food, but this time he just walks up to you, phone in hand. 

“Thank you baby.”

He sits down and starts eating, waiting for you to tell him about your day.

“Okay so, apparently they’ve been having these issues for a while and this isn’t the first time he’s made some comment about her revealing her body or wearing revealing clothes. Just today he told her that she couldn’t wear jean shorts to meet up with me. Like it's 90 degrees out, what did he want her to wear, fluffy pajama pants?”

“I’m sure he has his reasons for not wanting her to wear revealing clothes in public? Why doesn’t she just respect his wishes?”

“Because he doesn’t have control over what she wears and how she wants to show off her own body? Yeah they’re dating but it’s not like she’s his to claim or anything.”

“Are you sure you should be friends with someone that doesn’t at least try to hear their boyfriend out?”

“Sanghyeok, what the hell are you talking about? What’s gotten into you? Why are you acting like this?”

“Like what? I just mean that I wouldn’t want you to be around people that don’t respect what others say. Who knows? Maybe she’ll start ignoring what you say and just move on to something else. She’s making a big deal over one thing so what if you get into an argument one day and she stops being your friend? I wouldn't want that happening to you.”

He rubs your arm up and down, trying to get you to understand his point of view but you move away from his touch. 

“I don’t know why you're talking like that, but I don’t like it.”

You walk away from him, but something in your mind starts reconsidering your entire friendship with your best friend. Was she really so bad for not respecting her boyfriend's wishes over her clothes? 

A few more instances arise where Riwoo tries to nicely reason with you on who you can and can’t hang out with, saying things like “I don’t want you to get hurt,” or “I don’t think you should wear that, the men around you might get the wrong idea.” And you slowly found yourself listening to him, so much so to the point where you didn’t have anyone left to hang out with besides him. 

You spent days at home, your bright personality dimmed from not having any social interaction outside of your boyfriend. It wasn’t until you got a message from one of your friends, reaching out after you had made an excuse that Riwoo gave you to not hang out with her. It clicked in your brain that your friends had done nothing wrong. It was actually him that was the problem. 

“Hey baby, ready for movie night?” 

“No, I’m not.” 

You stood up from your little blanket cocoon ready to confront him. 

“You know what I realized? This whole time, you telling me not to hang out with this person or that doing this is wrong, even telling me what I can and can’t wear? You were just manipulating me this whole time. Why? You don’t think I should do things on my own?” 

“Baby, I wasn’t manipulating you I—“

“Do NOT call me baby, you have no right. You don’t care for me and you don’t even love me. If you did you would let me be myself and not this shell of the person I once used to be. If you don’t like how I am then why have we been together this long?” 

“Y/N, I was just looking out for you that’s it.” 

“Well you can stop looking out for me, we’re done.” 

You decide then to leave him, packing your things without turning back. He can tell he’s taken it too far. He was too selfish wanting you all for himself. You deserved happiness and you weren’t going to find that with him. 

༄ ༄ ༄

Jaehyun:

The textbook definition of a workaholic. Jaehyun had expressed to you before how important his career as an idol was and that if you couldn’t handle days without seeing him or barely seeing him at all, then a relationship wasn’t the best idea. But you of course, in the optimistic honeymoon phase, denied the hardships of being in a relationship with an idol and agreed to date him anyways. Love was enough, right? 

At first, things were great. It was hard, admittedly, having to hide yourself whenever you walked into the building and even from the staff for a while, only being able to meet him in empty conference rooms after somehow managing to sneak up there by yourself. But slowly his members and staff found out and you were in the clear to freely be around each other during his practices. You even brought snacks and lunch for everyone on occasion. But you also working meant that you didn’t get to see each other much. Though this is what you had anticipated, you didn’t think it was going to be as hard as it was. 

Jaehyun would be busy hosting or in variety shows or interviews in the morning and then spend the rest of his day at the practice room or the studio. He was allowed to be over at your apartment but even then it was hard only being able to sleep next to him for a couple hours since he would be too tired to engage in anything other than a short conversation whenever he came home. He would always try to call and talk but even that got redundant since he was always so busy. 

The lack of physical contact and barely any contact at all was starting to put a strain on your relationship. You would constantly try to get him to rest or stop working but he would insist that his work was too important to stop, often insinuating that it was more important than you.

You would try to visit him whenever possible but it always felt like you were always putting more effort to see him than he would to see you. It all came to a head when he was able to get a day off. The whole group was given time off after nonstop preparations for award shows and their upcoming tours. You were finally able to get your hands on him, innocently and not so much. The night he came home was great, filled with love and passion and all the pent up emotions from the months of strain you had endured. But the next day didn’t hold the same feelings. 

Waking up to each other was all that you had asked for since the beginning of your relationship. You’d usually find yourself asleep when he came home and then he’d be gone by the time you woke up. An endless cycle of just barely missing each other was halted for just a day. Assuming that you’d be in his arms the rest of the day, you let him sleep in as you shower and work on breakfast for the both of you, taking your time. 

“Good morning baby, it smells amazing in here.” 

The cliché back hug while you cooked up eggs was exactly what you had pictured, never wanting this moment to end. After eating you let him rest while you cleaned up a little bit. Once you were done, you were slightly disappointed to have found him in the room playing online games with Donghyun and Sungho.

“Hey baby. I thought we were going to hang out today?” 

You say, all cute and pouty. 

“I know, baby. I’m only gonna play a couple rounds with them and then I’m all yours, okay?” 

He gives you a quick kiss before going back to his game, focus completely shifting as he tried to recover from his last death. You sigh as you walk away. You didn’t want to sound commanding and needy but you’ve barely seen him and wanted to hang out with him. 

You kill time by watching shows on Netflix. One hour turns into two and two turns into 4 as he emerges from the room, a disappointed look on his face. Upon hearing the bedroom door open, you turn back to see him. 

“I have some bad news…” 

“Oh no, Jaehyun, what is it?” 

“They called me into the studio just now. Apparently something happened to the usb drive that had a bunch of pre-released tracks on them and they want to see if I can save them.” 

You look at him in disbelief, tears welling up in your eyes. Voice broken, you respond,

“C-can’t they call a computer technician or something? Why are they having you go? Do you know how to retrieve the files?”

“Well no but—“ 

“So why do you have to go then?” 

“Y/N…” 

He comes closer, giving you a hug as you let your tears stream down your face and into his shirt. 

“I’m sorry, I can’t just not go.” 

You didn’t want to sound rude or ungrateful, but you couldn’t let your anger build up any longer. 

“You just HAD to play games with Donghyun and Sungho huh? Instead of spending time with me.” 

You pull away from him, eyes red and angry as tears continue to spill from your eyes and voice cracking in rage. 

“They wanted to hop on for a bit and wanted me to join them…” 

“You see them EVERYDAY!! I’ve barely seen you because your work is SO important, more important than me and then the ONE day you have off, you choose to spend half the day with the people you see LITERALLY everyday and now you’re coming out here telling me that you have to go BACK to work??? Jaehyun I don’t know how much more of this I can take…” 

Tears are slipping down his cheeks as his voice starts to break at his next words, 

“Baby I told you that it was going to be hard and that my work is so important. You know I cant say no to them.”

“So you’re choosing work again over me? Just like how you chose your friends over me? And like how you choose everything else in your life over me? Alright, that’s fine.” 

You wipe your tears as the sadness dissipates and is replaced by anger. You have no words left to say as you try to walk past him, his hand grabbing your wrist delicately stopping you from walking away. 

“Y/N please, that’s not fair. I’m so sorry. You’re so important to me and I know this is hard but can we talk about this when I get back?” 

“I’ve given you plenty of chances Jaehyun. You always refuse my help, refuse my offer when I tell you to rest or spend time with me. I have nothing left to say to you.” 

You harshly pull your hand away from his grip, closing and locking the bedroom door as Jaehyun gathers himself, washing his face before grabbing his things and heading out to the studio. Maybe love wasn’t enough. 

༄ ༄ ༄

Taesan: 

Taesan was good at everything. Almost. He was smart, always got good grades and he was very musically talented. He could sing, rap, dance and even play the piano. He was also very determined, attending both college and dance/ singing practices at his entertainment company, KOZ. You knew he was very busy but you shared similar classes and would always pair up together for projects or assignments so not being able to see each other was never an issue. The problems arose when he was stressed beyond belief. 

He seemed very chill and nonchalant to strangers, not really showing his mischievous yet funny personality. But you knew him as the fun, lovable, fake emo that was surprisingly affectionate and loved giving you cute couple gifts, like the guitar heart keychain on your bag. But when he was stressed, it was like he shut the rest of the world out, including you. At first you thought he just didn’t know how to manage that much stress yet and would cut him some slack, letting him figure things out on his own. But when his behaviors under said stress persisted even after a couple months of dating, you were starting to get sick of it. 

He was good at everything, except telling you how he was feeling. He would text you normally one day and then go no contact for multiple days, even avoiding you during classes. It would irk you the most when you’d see him hanging out with his friends right in front of your face, acting like everything was fine and then ignoring you. Finally fed up with all his antics you waited again until he hit another no contact stress period to confront him. 

You both had a big exam coming up. Exams in this class were 20% of your grade, each, so you knew he would be stressed trying to juggle studying and practice. Like you predicted, a week before the exam he stopped messaging you. He didn’t even sit next to you in class, choosing to sit by himself in the corner of the lecture hall, face buried in his laptop and notes. You would find him later in the day at the student center, talking and laughing with his friends, still not having received even a single text from him for the last few days. You decided to take pictures of him with his friends, keeping it as evidence if he tried to deny your accusations. You waited until after the exam was over to message him, “let’s hang out today! I miss you :(,” hoping that your fake excitement was conveyed through the message. You weren’t surprised to see that he had messaged you back after, simply replying with “sure,” which made you even angrier. No talking for a week and the only thing he says back to you is “sure?” 

You’re with him in a solo practice room, the small space covered in mirrors on two sides a little claustrophobic for you. 

“Dongmin, we need to talk.” 

His sigh indicated to you that he knew what you wanted to talk about. 

“Alright, let’s get this over with.” 

His attitude was already bad, pissing you off even more. 

“Let’s get this over with? Why are you acting like this is such a burden on you? Ignoring me, your girlfriend, for a week because you’re stressed studying for an exam and being here at practice but you can hang out with your friends no problem?” 

“Y/N you’re being ridiculous I wasn’t hanging out with my friends and I have been stressed, you know that.” 

“Oh really?” 

You scoff, pulling up the picture of him laughing with a couple of his friends, the date being that of 2 days ago. His face doesn’t change, if anything he looks more uninterested than when the conversation started, not even caring that he was caught in his lie. 

“You’re really gonna stand here and tell me that you haven’t been hanging out with your friends all week when you have? Why can’t you just tell me why you don’t message me, why you ignore me whenever you have too much on your plate. All I ask is that you communicate but you never do!” 

“You’re just too much to deal with.” 

That one sentence shut you up, tears on the brink of falling from your eyes. You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. 

“What?” 

“Recently you’ve been too much to deal with. Especially when I’m stressed. I can’t handle you and all my work and practice all together. And you know I’m not good at communicating. I don’t like to talk about my feelings.” 

It was the way that he had no emotion behind his sentences that made the lump in your throat even bigger. When did he stop caring about you? When did he stop loving you?

“Where is all this coming from? I thought everything was fine? You always acted normal after your little ghosting.” 

“You never saw that as a problem? That I would ghost you and pretend that everything was fine after? At first I was just learning how to juggle everything at once. But after a while, I started to get tired of this. I guess I just didn’t know how to say it.” 

He was so cold about it that you didn’t know how to react. Heart broken into a million pieces, you couldn’t believe what you were hearing. 

“You should’ve told me a while ago. Before things got this far. It’s been 8 months and you couldn’t tell me that you didn’t want to be together?” 

“Sorry. Like I said, I don’t talk about my feelings or emotions. You should’ve known that.” 

You couldn’t stand to be in that suffocating room with him any longer, shoving him out of the way as you bolt out the door, tears falling haphazardly as you exit the building. You were so lost, so hurt that he was feeling this way and never said a thing and yet he still managed to make you feel like shit about it. You wipe your tears away, removing the keychain he gave you from your bag and throwing it down to the ground, stomping on it. 

“Fuck you, Han Dongmin.”

༄ ༄ ༄

Leehan: 

The undeniably attractive, oblivious and kind hearted man that everyone loves. He was incredibly popular on your small campus, loved by men and women alike. So you were very surprised to find that he had taken an interest in you. You wouldn’t say you had a crush on him but of course you couldn’t deny his beauty. You weren’t shy per se but you didn’t put yourself out there. You had your circle of friends and did your part in the clubs you were in but that was it. 

Everyone knew him as the lovely fish guy, always talking about his pet fish and what he hopes to achieve in his tank in the future. You had only ever seen him at your school’s aqua life club, as he was the president of it. You worked with him before but you didn’t know him that well. 

“Hey Y/N.” 

There were a couple of other people helping to organize the fundraiser your club was hosting, Donghyun came to speak to you first.

“Hey Donghyun, how’ve you been?”

“I’m doing well. I actually had a question to ask you.” 

“Oh? What’s up? Did you need help with something for the club?” 

He nervously scratches the nape of his neck before flashing his bright smile at you. 

“Actually, I was wondering if you would want to go out with me sometime? I completely understand if you don’t want to but I just thought I’d ask.”

You were taken aback, not really expecting to have been asked on a date by him, but you agreed nonetheless. Which brought you to your current situation. 

Donghyun would constantly get invited out to parties by his friends or girls who thought they had a chance with him. You guys had more of a friends with benefits relationship, occasionally going on dates whenever he asked. But you inevitably caught feelings for him. You were scared to confront him about them, worried about what his reaction might be. The next time you saw him was when he invited you out to dinner. After eating, you went back to your apartment. Usually the time after your date was spent feeling each other up, as per your arrangement, but today felt different. Dognhyun could feel the tension radiating off of you so he waited until you were back inside to ask you about it.

“Everything okay? You seemed a little tense back at the restaurant?”

You fiddled with your jewelry, his nervous smile making you even more nervous. 

“Yeah it's just… there's something we need to talk about…”

“Oh, no. Don’t tell me you have a boyfriend now and have to end things with me? If you waited to tell me that after our date then that's just cruel.”

His laugh is lighthearted, almost mocking, as if the possibility of you getting a boyfriend and breaking things off him was unlikely. You reciprocate his laugh nonetheless.

“No… I actually think we need to end things for a different reason.”

His joking manner turned serious as the words left your mouth, sitting on the couch and pulling you down with him. 

“Did I do anything to upset you? I like this arrangement we have and if there's anything I can do to fix it please tell me.”

“No Donghyun, it's not you. It's just… I like you. I know that's against what our arrangement was about but I can’t help it.”

“Y/N… you know I can’t date you. It’d be too… weird. I don't meant weird but you know, I’m the president of aqua life and I have a big name here and-”

“And being with me would ruin your reputation so you decided to just sleep with me instead?”

He fell silent, confirming your previous statement and you felt your heart drop into your stomach. How had you not known how he truly felt this whole time?

“Why take me out on all these dates then if you strictly wanted it to be just sex? It’s not like everyone in the club doesn’t know anyways so this ruining your reputation bullshit doesn’t make much sense. Or were you just hoping that things would work out and you could throw me away when you got bored?”

“I’m sorry, I just don’t want a relationship with you. I took you out on dates to be nice so we could keep things like this between us. If I had known you were going to catch feelings for me I wouldn’t have done all this.”

“You’re such an asshole. You were giving me mixed signals this whole time, taking me out and treating me like a girlfriend, holding my hand and shit and you expected me not to catch feelings? Just so I’d stay fucking you in hopes that I dont realize just how much you suck? You’re a dick, Donghyun.”

He didn’t have it in him to try to argue with you or calm you down, getting up from the sofa.

“I feel like I’ve said a lot of things that were taken out of context. If you would like to talk more about this then let me know. But for the record, I do apologize for all of this. I wouldn’t have done it if I knew this is how things would go.”

“You can take your apology and shove it up your ass, Donghyun.”

You basically push him out of your apartment, slamming the door in his face. You waited until you heard his footsteps walk away to silently sob to yourself for not seeing his true colors sooner. 

༄ ༄ ༄

Woonhak:

A normally very sweet yet childish boy that had so much love to give you. His passive aggressive tendencies towards his friends would always make you laugh, his embarrassment at being babied by them entertaining to you. He could be the most perfect boyfriend ever, when he didn’t have anger issues. Even though he would never admit to it, Woonhak was very sensitive and it was very apparent when he was angry or ticked off. It didn’t help that he couldn’t control himself when he was angry, often opting to yell at the person that made him mad. 

The first time you saw him angry, he was in an argument with Jaehyun. With their comeback approaching quickly, tensions between all the boys were high and all the criticisms were getting to them. While the others had more sensibility and maturity when it came to controlling their anger, Woonhak would just explode. You had walked into the practice room to deliver dinner to the boys, a simple meal you got from the food stand down the road. You heard yelling come from the practice room but you just assumed it was an instructor giving them directions for their comeback stage. But upon walking in, you see Woonhak and Jaehyun fighting, screaming about the performance. 

You were quite soft spoken yourself, so hearing Woonhak yell like that scared you, making you drop the food on the floor, alerting the two boys of your presence. They both looked at you seething, but Jaehyun’s expression softened up when he saw you there, standing frozen as the food had started leaking from the bag and onto the floor. Woonhak looks at you but just huffs and walks away, probably embarrassed that you had to see that. You slowly clean up the food in shock, Jaehyun apologizing while helping you clean. 

You go to see Woonhak after and see that he had tear stains down his cheeks, visible through his messed up makeup. Thinking you were Jaehyun, he started yelling again, asking to be left alone before looking back at you, seeing the tears in your eyes in fear of being yelled at by him. He quickly apologizes to you before walking away, mad at himself for being such an idiot and blowing up at you for no reason. You were scared and upset, not being able to handle being yelled at from anyone, especially your boyfriend. 

You had waited for him to come to you and when he did, he immediately apologized again and hugged you, asking for your forgiveness. You of course said yes, as long as he doesn’t yell at you ever again. He agreed and you guys were fine for a while. After the comeback and promotions, they were right back to practicing for another comeback plus the first part of their tour. You had learned that Woonhak just needed space when preparing for comebacks, so you always gave him distance when he was at his busiest, but recently, everything seemed to piss him off, including you. 

You would be at his dorm, preparing food for the boys after practice and he would come home mad, stressed and tired. You’d politely offer him a try of the food you are making, only to be swatted away by him and ignored, making you feel less than adequate. He did this a couple times and your patience slowly dwindled, until you met your breaking point. 

A particularly rough afternoon had resulted in him getting into a fight with Taesan over lyrics to their new song. He was being reprimanded for trying to add lyrics that were shot down multiple times. You just so happened to get caught in crossfire, and he would blame you, saying that it was your constant need for his attention that distracted him. Upon hearing this you felt the tears well up in your eyes. 

“Is that what you think of me? A distraction to your music career for simply wanting to be by your side?”

Taesan looked like a deer in headlights, excusing himself from the situation, afraid of feeling your wrath. 

“Y/N, you know that's not what I mean, I’m just frustrated.”

“That's the issue Kim Woonhak, you’re ALWAYS frustrated. You're always stressed and there's always something wrong. Anytime I try to help you, you treat me like I’m a burden and I can never be good enough to help you. You always ignore me when I’m here so I’ve stopped asking for your attention in hopes that you’d come to me for once but you never do. Do you even want to be with me anymore?”

Tears were flowing down his cheeks not being able to hold them back any longer after your confession. 

“Y-Y/N, i love you so much. I’m sorry I’m so busy… I want to be with you I swear I can treat you right I just need some time during this comeback and–”

“I’ve given you nothing but time, Woonhak. I don’t have any more of my time to give you. I can’t stay here while you yell at me and I can’t stand the fact that you think I’m the one holding you back. So I won’t be here to hold you back anymore, Kim Woonhak. We’re done.”

You can no longer hold your tears back, letting them roll down your face and onto the ground as you slowly pack up your belongings, giving him one last hug before leaving, wishing him luck on his upcoming comeback and tour. 

[mummyscarian]

AITA for accusing my roommate of "cheating" on us?

(a/n: for martyn's wild life aita)

For context, I (29M) am roommates with my best friend (31M), who I'll call G, and a mutual friend of ours (40'sM), who I'll call S. We only recently became roommates, and are still adjusting to living together. S and I get along really well, and I thought G was happy being our roommate too but now I'm not too sure.

So basically, we needed some ingredients for something but we didn't have any, so S and I went out to go get some together while G went out on his own, which I thought was odd, because he could have gone with us.

We ended up getting the ingredients we needed from some friends of ours, and we even ended up getting a cow too, which we also needed! When G got back he didn't tell us where he had gone, but everything still seemed okay to me, until later on, when he, again, said he was going off on his own to go get some supplies. This felt really weird to me, and I asked S if he also thought it was weird, but he didn't at first.

But then G came back a little later, saying he had forgotten something, and I stopped him and asked him to be honest with us about where he was going, and if he was hiding things from us. He was confused, and said he was just going to get supplies for us. S believed him, but I still wasn't sure. We got into a bit of an argument over him leaving on his own, and he was the one who said I was accusing him of "cheating" on him even though I didn't say that specifically, but I do kind of feel like he WAS cheating on us as roommates by leaving so often.

G went off on his own again, and S and I talked for a bit afterwards. Then our friend M came over. M mentioned that he and G had been working together and that he and G had gotten some cows together, which shocked me as G had never mentioned getting any cows at all. S accused M of trying to make G look like a liar, because M is known to try and stir drama sometimes, but M said it was true and to ask some other friends of ours as apparently they had STOLEN the cows from them. We told M to stay here until G got back because we wanted to hear the truth from G.

When G got back, we asked him if had gotten cows. And he immediately said he had! We got upset at M then for trying to make G look bad, but G explained that they had worked together to get the cows. S and I decided to believe him, but M pointed out how quickly I was to accuse both him and G, and G also called me paranoid. We ended up moving on from that and got into a slightly related argument with M which also ended with M calling all three of us paranoid.

Am I really being too paranoid? I feel like I was justified in feeling weird about how G kept leaving S and I. AITA?

update: I ended up talking with G some more, and he told me that he DID tell me he had gotten the cows and hidden them, and I realized I had thought he was talking about MY cow that I had also hidden.

[laukoslovergirl]

good graces

Pairing: Joey Daccord x singer!reader

Warnings: um cheesy and probably bad writing

Summary: Y/n is a famous singer with a not so secret crush on joey daccord. Based on my SMAU.

word count: 1.1K

Notes: i wanted to make this longer but that was not working for me so :(

You would be lying if you said the song hadn’t started as a joke. Your ex was a big sports fan. He followed them all, but hockey was his favorite so you had gotten pretty into the game as your relationship progressed. The main problem was his insecurity as you gained popularity, he continually brought up the argument that you were going to leave him for a sports player. Then you understood why he was worried about you leaving him for someone better because he was cheating you with some b-list actress. Jokes on him the songs he inspired skyrocketed your fame. Then your team thought you’d play into the bit of one of your biggest songs from your newest album. Good Graces the most popular line being ”Break my heart, and I swear I'm movin' on with your favorite athlete”.  While touring you ended the night in one of that city's sports jerseys. Famously you never wore a current player’s jersey, they all had your last name on the back and your favorite number.  You made it a point to only do two hockey teams though. His favorite Seattle Kraken and his least favorite The Toronto Maple Leafs. Finally having some time in your schedule while touring you found yourself at a Seattle Kraken game. Clad in Joey Daccord’s Jersey which you would be wearing at your concert tomorrow night on stage. It was your idea at a grand gesture to shoot your shot. You’d always found the man incredibly attractive, not to mention he was your ex's favorite player. You were feeling incredibly spiteful recently which had prompted the recent events in your life. Most notable today. You had spent some time with your team to get yourself not only on Kraken’s radar but Joey's as well. Tweets about his performance in a game. Arranging for you to read the starting line up to the guys in the locker room to also get some one on one time with them and invite them to your concert the next night. 

“Okay I’m not gonna lie to you guys, I'm nervous about this. Before I read the starting lineup I wanted to let you guys know you're all invited to the show tomorrow.” You blushed standing in the center of the locker room slip of paper in hand with the lineup. You had your best friend with you for moral support. “Vip access” you smiled at them as they let out a cheer. 

“Don’t be short stack, we love you already” Jaime Oleksiak said from his spot. You chuckled at the nickname, in all fairness everyone was short to the 6’7” giant. “I’ll pay someone on the other team to go after you” you joked with a smile. 

“Okay we got number 19 Jared Mcman, number 10 Matty Beniers, and number 7 Jordan Eberle. Defense number 6 Adam Larsson and number 62 Brandon Montour. Last but certainly not least number 35 Jdac." The boys clapped and cheered in between each name.  You looked up to see Grubauer nudging Joey out of his thoughts. 

“Okay now can i get some pictures with you guys?” you asked knowing both Kraken media had wanted the photos as well as your own PR team. The boys got up to meet you in the center of the room. “Wait hold on i gotta take off my jacket” you turned to your body guard and unzipped the big leather jacket you were wearing it had a bedazzled kraken logo on the back. Revealing a bedazzled Daccord jersey you were wearing like a dress. Taking pictures first as one big group then in smaller groups and one on one with some players. chit chatting with the boys and exchanging phone numbers and social media handles with a few.  Finally the goalie tandems turn, Joey and Philip wrapped their arms around your shoulders both their tall frames towering over your smaller body. As the boys thanked you and turned to go back to getting ready you stopped joey. 

“Wait this is awkward but I had another photo I wanted with you.” you asked, hand on his wrist. “Anything you want you can have” he finally said something to you having been pretty silent since you entered the room. You blushed and tried to escape the moment waving your best friend over. She was wearing a Grubauer jersey bedazzled like yours, but she also held a jersey with your last name on it for Joey to wear. You were still blushing over his words as he chuckled at the jersey presented to him. He slipped off his hoodie and slid on the new jersey. You couldn’t help but stare as he changed and your best friend snickered at you. You elbowed her in the side as Joey turned to throw his hoodie in his stall. You instructed Joey through the pose you wanted for the photo backs to the camera heads turned to display the back. You demonstrated the pose before looking at him, your eyes locking for a moment as he stared at you intensely. He was in the middle of you and y/bf/n. Then you took one facing the camera with big smiles on your faces. 

“Thanks Joey.” you smiled at him, your agent handing you your phone. “You look good in my jersey” he whispered to you, wrapping you in a hug, before turning and walking away. You momentarily forgot what you were even doing thinking about being wrapped in his arms. 

“Kick some ass out there boys, me and y/bf/n are gonna go find buoy” you hollered leaving the locker room. You heard wolf whistles and some chirps called to joey and you could only imagine what chaos you had just caused. 

– – – – –

Finally you were sitting in your seats. Getting ready for puck drop and to experience the game. You were currently on your phone making an instagram post. Some photos from the night. A simple dump of one of you in the stands, a picture of the ice and a photo of joey. With the caption “break my heart and i’m moving on with your favorite athlete 🩵🩷. As planned buoy made a cheeky comment and then found you during the game and y’all caused some chaos around the stadium. 

– – – – –

Beiners: I gave Joey your number. You’re welcome!! Super excited for the show tomorrow.

The game had just ended a 6-3 loss to Colorado. 

You hadn’t known one of the youngest members of the team would come in clutch as a wingman but he was completing tasks your pea brain had forgotten about. Before you had the chance to respond to matty and new text came in.

[pizza-soup]

Hey! Just wanted to do an update for the new year!

Sooo, what have I been up to? A lot actually!

First off, I'd like to introduce a new member to my household, her name is Lucky, and I found her on an urbex trip last year as a tiny thing, and looked how gorgeous she is as an adult!

Those markings are pretty neat, huh? She's looks just like a Maneki Neko, all that's missing is a red ribbon and koban coin. She has such a sweet, affectionate personality, she is surprisingly very open to strangers giving her attention, and she loves water! Yeah, she plays in water! She has zero fear of it and likes playing with the sink faucet or laying on my shoulders when I soaking in the bath. I think it stems from me taking her out to the garden with me in the summer when I was watering the plants, the puddles cooled her off.

Speaking of gardening, I have two new trees. Ginkgos! My great aunt had one in her front yard, these are the babies. Since it's way too cold to plant them directly into the ground, they're currently in pots. I want them to grow just a bit larger before transplanting them.

And yes, that's Sol posing by the new trees! Look how handsome he is now! I'm glad he and his sister took in Lucky as an honorable sibling, I think she'd be very lonely otherwise. Stella has also grown up to be beautiful, and likes sharing her bed with Lucky. Orion doesn't like her though. Lol but he tolerates her so long as she doesn't get too close.

My health is better, thankfully. While I think I'll always have hypotension now, my doctor and I found a setup that works to keep it at bay. I have to watch my activity level and learn to rest properly (exercise can cause BP to drop fast), and stay hydrated with electrolytes daily. I have to set reminders though, since Im so bad at remembering. So far I haven't had any relapses for 7 months. I've also oddly lost a lot of weight, I thought it was suspicious, but my doctor said I'm actually at my BMI and the weight loss was gradual. My records show it was within a normal time range. Idk it felt so sudden to ME, but maybe I didn't notice it until recently. Eh. My sense of time isn't the best. Whatever the case, I was told to keep doing whatever I'm doing.

Work is... just as weird as always! Lol to the point it's kind of not weird for me anymore, I've gotten used to the strangeness of it. My brother however never got used to it. He actually quit working for the labs, not because it scared him off but because he finally got his major finished and he is working in an observatory down south. I'm proud of him! Space has always been a big interest for him, and the space science here in NM is growing!

As for creating, I've been busy writing two fanfics on Ao3. One is a Pokemon story, Come What May, and another is an alternate take on the classic Disney film, The Little Mermaid, called Candle on the Water. They're pretty long, my Pokemon fic is currently topping 20 chapters! I'd really appreciate if more people read them. Give em a little love. It's not the best work ever, but I'm kinda proud of them. They were written when I was struggling with a lot of self doubt and mild Imposter Syndrome. I'm working on being more gentle to myself and not letting perfectionism sabotage me or stop me from creating, and I'm kinda seeing that effort pay off bit by bit.

I've also been doing some song covers. I'm not sure if I'm confident in sharing those yet, but I've gotten a lot of encouragement from my family and my brother's friend who has been letting me borrow his music studio for recording sessions. Maybe I'll post one song if it's requested. I have three covers so far and they're all Evanescence. XD

Its been a very peaceful time for me, I got a raise last November and it's been nice. I've been treating myself to stationery and home decor. I splurged a bit and got two gaming devices from Anbernic, and have been modding my 3DSXL. Because screw gaming companies and their paywalling/microtransactions. It's time we start actually owning our games again, including media like music and movies.

I think this year is going to focus on retro media for me. CDs, DVDs, cassettes and vinyls. I've been rediscovering my collection in the garage and learning to maintain/fix my devices. Because while I do enjoy my modern media, I like the thought of having offline backups should I not have access to it later.

And my old school stuff takes me back to my summer days in school when I couldn't wait to get home to play my Gameboy while listening to my CDs, reading comics, or doodle and write short stories in my notebooks, or make zines with my friends. That might be something to revisit this summer.

I hope everything has been going well for you all, and if not, I hope it will soon. I may just return to this year, but probably gradually. I missed you all, and I miss sharing bits of my life here with you.

Take care! 💕

[zith-ipeth]

Dog Days Diary: Learning the tricks of the trade

Howdy folks

Recently I’ve been running into a lot of issues with my plurality, but, I’ve been doing pretty awesome on the animality and therianthropy front. This and a couple small things. Let’s talk about it

As some of you know I work at a pet supply store meaning almost every day I’m interacting with dogs as much as people, or interacting with people about dogs, and it’s doing wonders on my euphoria

Sometimes I’ve gotten so caught up in interacting with a pooch on the ground I almost start to play bow before I catch myself, the smell of dog fur and kibble is just, it’s amazing. I’ve gotten back into wearing my ears out more, which has been great for me!

Little things like these make being a dog feel, grounded, in humanity and society rather than out in the woods, I’m a house dog, a stray dog, I’m not a wolf by any means, and my doghood, my connection to that piece of me, has been as strong as ever

However my whole “two of them” situation hasn’t been the best recently

I’ve mentioned this a couple times on my blog but my headaches have gotten a lot worse, it’s honestly a learning experience every time, I learn new things that cuase Clover to want to be closer to consciousness, and have been working on avoiding those, mostly postive, triggers until we’re somewhere safe

Honestly it wouldn’t be so bad if the way I learned all this wasn’t trial and error with head splitting migraines

She’s been up to some antics though, it’s been good, she went shopping, by herself mostly and it went not badly. She’s been enjoying her show (Kipo Age of Wonderbeasts) which I joined in for last night and, I mean, yeah I get her excitement.

On her little shopping spree we finally got clothes that actually fit us! Which is, kinda big, at least I was getting tired of things being to tight, and idk, that’s been really happy for me

Sorry I havnt been doing daily the past few days, its been, hard, but I think its getting better now

It has to get better now

I will make sure it does

Run fast, bite hard, bark loud

Peace, love, and gratitude

-Zith Ipeth

//Clover Brooks//

[zanyana626]

Saw this & wanted to join in!

What's the origin of your blog's title?: "Zany" bc I joined tumblr around the time of the Animaniacs reboot, "Ana" bc my friends call me that for short, & "626" bc it's my birthdate/Stitch day!

Favorite Fandoms: Yeaaah, there's a ton! But my top 3 at the moment are: Gravity Falls, The Amazing Digital Circus, & the Pedro Pascal fandom!

OTP(s) + shipname: Again, there's too many so I'll just go with my current top 3 ships; Jinmao, Gelphie, & Abstragedy

Favorite color: Purple 💜😈🔮💟🪻

Favorite game: Other than the uQuiz personality quizzes that pop up on my dash every once in a while, I’ve been into sim games lately

Song stuck in your head: Heavy Metal Lover by Lady Gaga

Weirdest habit/trait?: Random ass noises. Like for example, when I'm happy, I'll sometimes do the Nezuko muffled hums; I think it's half my weirdo self, half my weeb self

Hobbies: Reading, writing, does sleep still count as a hobby??? 😅

If you work, what's your profession?: Currently halfway done with my Medical Assistant program, so hopefully once I get the license, I'll finally be able to get a decent job!

If you could have any job you wish what would it be?: Literally anything that pays well. But if we're talking something specific, then marine biologist. I remember taking a class about it in high school and was intrigued about all the sea critters & how we impact their ecosystems. But having to study around in the middle of the ocean, in the dark, most likely far away from civilization, not to mention the fact that I can't swim at all, well...

Something you're good at: I think I’m a good support system to my friends/loved ones when they talk about their personal issues going on in their lives & I just do my best to listen to them and give them words of encouragement.

Something you're bad at: Calculating or math in general.

Something you love: Listening to history videos, specifically the ones talking about amusement park/abandoned concepts/Disney rides history. For these types of videos, I recommend checking out Yesterworld or Defunctland's YT channels.

Something you could talk about for hours off the cuff: Demon Slayer, Disney, & the MCU (to some extent)

Something you hate: In general, rude, homophobic, shallow, & overall judgmental people.

Something you collect: Pins & plushies! I stopped for now bc they've gotten more expensive in last few years, I'm saving up for other stuff, & plus I STILL have to organize my pin binder/overall room space for my plushies.

Something you forget: How quick I forget certain things.

What's your love language?: Words of affirmation, I never thought about it TBH

Favorite movie/show: Once again, check my Favs list!

Favorite food: SHRIMP!! I love making garlic shrimp scampi w/pasta or the occasional tempura shrimp <3 🦐🍤🦐🍤🦐🍤🦐🍤🦐🍤 And if we're talking sweets, then the one thing I'll fight to the death for is mint chocolate chip ice cream!

Favorite animal: Duckies 🦆🦆🦆

Are you musical?: I'm not gonna lie, I really didn't really care for musicals, especially in high school. HOWEVER, the pandemic lockdown changed my view on musicals. I'll forever be grateful for the Tumblr anon who recommended me Six the Musical. I also never learned to play a musical instrument.

What were you like as a child?: A complete wildcard, that's for damn sure! As of recent years, my family & I have reason to believe that I went undiagnosed of autism my entire childhood & we never really noticed bc my brother's diagnosis was more evident when we were little. But other than that, I was a shy Bratz/PPG/Sanrio/Disney Princess/Monster High girlie!

Favorite subject at school?: Marine Biology, Psychology, History, & Ceramics (yes we had a ceramics class in high school & I loved how chill it was)

Least favorite subject?: FUCK MATH, ALL MY HOMIES HATE MATH!!!

What's your best character trait?: Being empathetic

What's your worst character trait?: I tend to stress out over every little thing, also I'm lazy af! 😅😅😅

If you could change any detail of your day right now what would it be?: The weather. It's been too cold these past couple of days, I don't even want to get out of bed at all!!!

If you could travel in time who would you like to meet?: Definitely my grandmother when she was younger, bc of all the crazy funny stories I've heard about her. But if we're going by famous people, then Selena Quintanilla or maybe my pookie Pedro Pascal so that I can be his controversial young wife & live our best lives together, <3

Recommend one of your favorite fanfics (spread the love!): Uhhhh... I'm not sure if I should, most fanfics I read are certain husbando x reader type fics (& they're the spicier ones, I'll leave it at that!)

Tagging: @boombams @greyladyblue @myscalesofjustice @princessacelilith & anyone else who sees this is more than welcome to join in!

Get to know your Mutuals

Thanks for the tag @perlen-gold, even though I’m just an unhinged follower obsessed with your writing 🙈 I started my own chain so your original post wouldn’t get too long.

What's the origin of your blog's title? My thirst for Adar and the gauntlet kink he inspired.

Favorite Fandoms: I have a lot, but The Silmarillion/The Lord of the Rings/The Rings of Power are my main ones I always fall back on.

OTP(s) + shipname: I’m a self shipper so me + whomever I’m obsessed with (currently Melkor, Adar, and Gil-galad) but also more recently:

Melkor x Mairon (Angbang)

Adar x Celebrimbor (Silverscars)

Favorite color: Orange (also partial to purple and dark green).

Favorite game: Hero Quest (I’m not a console gamer. Though I did enjoy watching my husband play Horizon Zero Dawn).

Song stuck in your head: Dog Days (Are Over) by Florence and The Machine.

Weirdest habit/trait? Oh boy, where to begin… I make random noises, I meep like Beaker to songs, laugh at my own jokes… I’m just a weird person altogether folks.

Hobbies: Writing, visiting places of historical interest, I also used to be an avid reader but then motherhood robbed me of my energy and concentration. I listen to audiobooks more now.

If you work, what's your profession? I write scientific reports and run data tables for an Early Drug Development CRO, which is as fun as it sounds. I’m also a mother. Everything you’ve heard about motherhood is true and also a lie.

If you could have any job you wish what would it be? I would be rich enough not to need to work 🤷🏻‍♀️ or working on a petting farm would be cute.

Something you're good at: Berating myself. Encouraging others/being a cheerleader. Also writing, I hope 🙈

Something you're bad at: Most things, but especially anything requiring mathematics or physical exercise.

Something you excel at: Being a silly goose 😏thirsting over fictional characters 🙈 and raging at injustices. Erm, I think that’s about it. How tragic for me 😂

Something you love: The community I’ve found here on Tumblr 🫶🏼 period dramas, Dracula, and tattoos (I have none of my own… yet).

Something you could talk about for hours off the cuff: Mormonism, The Wars of the Roses, the people I love.

Something you hate: Injustice, mayonnaise, and corsets improperly portrayed in period drama.

Something you collect: Cuddly toy bats, and more characters to thirst over (I need help).

Something you forget: That motherhood is difficult so to give myself more grace.

What's your love language? I don’t adhere to love languages, but I guess genuine connection over similar interests, banter/in-jokes.

Favorite movie/show: Aaahhh don’t make me choose! It’s always changing.

Favorite food: Galaxy Cookie Crumble, Mini Eggs, Yorkshire puddings, and pizza.

Favorite animal: Bats 🦇

Are you musical? I can hold a tune and I played flute as a kid, otherwise sadly no.

What were you like as a child? Intelligent, saw everything in black and white, more artistic, more outgoing.

Favorite subject at school? History and art.

Least favorite subject? Maths and PE.

What's your best character trait? I like to think I’m kind and understanding.

What's your worst character trait? I can be so incredibly lazy.

If you could change any detail of your day right now what would it be? More sleep. Always more sleep.

If you could travel in time who would you like to meet? Bram Stoker. I’d also love to meet my mum as a young woman, I think we would have had fun.

Recommend one of your favorite fanfics (spread the love!):

Come by @perlen-gold (Angbang)

Of Convenience by @greenleaf4stuff (Silverscars)

Last but not least, show your favorite fanart of your favorite character(s) (please remember to credit/add links!):

Melkor/Morgoth

Adar

Gil-Galad (TROP)

No pressure tags for @greenleaf4stuff, @valar-did-me-wrong, @strifes13, @wowstrawberrycow, @iwanderbecauseimlost, @withallthatisleftofmyheart, @calmlyy-chaotiic, @margauxmara, @varda-starqueen, @saffronstories, @gingeragenda, @gracefallingart, @dwarveslikeshinythings, @whenimaunicorn, @permanentlyexhaustedpigeon88 and anyone else who would like to play! Sorry if I missed anyone.

[aroaceleovaldez]

i still can't believe the LA Times article/interview just. openly admits that the show intentionally, from the beginning, fully removed Gabe being abusive and overtly made him just a nosy loser. Percy's relationship with Gabe is so important to how he navigates the world and the themes of the series. Percy's first monster is in his own home. He uses wards against evil against his step-father and they work. He has overt PTSD that colors his interactions with Mr. D and is why he's so antagonistic towards him for like four books. It isn't until Percy is able to move past his trauma and how Mr. D reminds him of Gabe that he sees Mr. D for who he actually is and understand him and begin to empathize with him. Heck, even into HoO we see Percy having visceral reactions to implications of alcohol/drinking because of Gabe. Everything about Percy's home life colors him as a character. His trauma and PTSD informs his perspective and they explicitly removed his PTSD in the show.

They removed Percy's PTSD. They brush over his experiences as a neurodivergent/disabled kid after the first episode and turned Sally into an Autism Speaks mom. Why. On what planet was that a reasonable change to be made.

[bet-on-me-13]

Ghost Cores are Dionesium

So! I while ago, I saw a Post about Danny and the Court of Owls, and one suggestion in the comments basically said, "What if Dionesium, the stuff they use to bring back the dead, is just Ghost Cores?"

And that got me thinking. Lazarus Pits are just Dionesium Infused Water, so how would they be created if Dionesium is a Ghosts Core? Well they way I see it, Lazarus Pits can only be formed in 2 Ways.

The first way is for a large number of Ghosts to be Ended at the same time, with their shattered Cores piling up and dissolving into Water.

The other way, if for an Ancient to Die. The Ancients are practically God's, and as such their Cores are immense in Power. When an Ancient dies, and their Core is left to dissolve in the Human Realm, it forms a Lazarus Pit in the exact same way it would take hundreds of normal Cores to do so.

Where am I going with this?

Well, isn't there a Giant Lazarus Pit under Gotham? The Batcave even has one, doesn't it?

The reason Gotham is so cursed isn't because Lady Gotham likes to collect Curses, or because her Ectoplasm is corrupted, it's because she isn't there to stop them anymore.

Lady Gotham is Dead.

Her Core sank deep into the Earth, forming a Lazarus Pit under the entire City, but thankfully far away from her People. She died, and only the fact that she is a Conceptual spirit saved a piece of her Consciousness. She represents a City, she can only fully be killed if the entire City is leveled. That doesn't mean she is still alive however, just that the barest sliver of her mind is hanging on by a Thread.

This is how Gotham possessed Batman that one time, it was her base instincts saving one of her precious children.

If you want her to be a little more cognizant, maybe she is just severely Injured? Her Core is cracked to the edge of shattering and she desperately needs help.

She she calls out to whoever could save her, and a certain Ghost Boy hears her cry for help?

[soulmvtes]

i feel the closest i have ever felt to myself and that is the reason why i know things will feel better soon

[spaciebabie]

at first getting diagnosed with cptsd was like, "yay my trauma has been validated (it always was valid)!" and i really thought that was going to be it, but then i started to do research as i do whenever i realize i have something and learned that!! the way i experience socialization is!! quite horrid actually!!

[pepperpixel]

I haven’t posted art in forever, (I am currently working on art tho!! It’s just taking me a bit cuz.. job..) but! But… what about if instead of the art u guys came here for. I instead posted pictures of the cool lil outfits I’ve been wearing recently that im rlly proud of… what about that???

[disdaidal]

Someone who constantly embarks on ship wars and fandom wank... doesn't sound too mentally stable. It's sad, really.

Dedicating all that energy and free time to arguing about fictional characters and their relationships, instead of channeling it into something more relaxing or creative, sounds destructive.

Seek help, please. Before it devours you completely.

[camgoloud]

you ever just. become overwhelmed by a sudden out-of-nowhere wave of tenderness and affection and longing for reconnection directed towards someone to whom you no longer speak for Very Good Reasons

[berryblu-soda]

Anyways update i just didnt bother to post earlier:

fr God is good and the whole car crash my parents got into last week was so incredibly mild in terms of injuries!!!! worst was a bruised knee im pretty sure

ALSO-

*taps mic* HUG YOUR FREAKING LOVED ONES OR SO HELP ME!!!!!!!

[joshuaalbert]

actually writing some words everyone say thnak you ultra fantasy ruby red monster energy

[sabraeal]

1000 Followers Update!

Due to some super fun chronic health shenanigans, the posting for the 1000 Followers Celebration is being postponed a month! Posting will start on 2/2 with to all the ghost still standing in this room, and continue as previously planned from there. Thank you guys for bearing with me-- I struggled with the idea of even postponing for a week, but it became very clear on Monday that I would not be able to catch up with the schedule unless I took an extended break to recover. Can't wait to show you guys what I've got up my sleeve!