#but it’s not like I have an ALTERNATIVE 💀
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being an adult is so hard 😭
#frankly also. how do people who work full time manage their life#like I spent three hours on the phone with an insurance yesterday#now I’m in the bank#all the flat stuff is ofc also during the day#I’m a student and I’m fucking only my future self over by wasting so much time on this shit#but it’s not like I have an ALTERNATIVE 💀#anyways. 9-5 society is fucking evil#shut up Sam
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a MCU/Percy Jackson crossover with Bucky Barnes as a demigod. Ik your already thinking, he's a soldier so Ares obviously but he's actually a child of Aphrodite. Reasoning: before the war and when he's healed he is dressed very well. He wasn't really into war. he's never really fighting for the fight, he's fighting for someone or because he has to. He was forced to be a soldier in both instances (drafted/brainwashed). Mcu Bucky doesn't give off Ares kid vibes. So Aphrodite kid.
#plus theirs this version of Aphrodite called Aphrodite Areia which is a war like Aphrodite and the idea of this Aphrodite kid#forcibly going from 🥰💋🕊 to 🌹⚔️💔. b#bucky barnes#marvel mcu#marvel cinimatic universe#now comic bucky is an ares kid he was rasied by the military LITTERLY that was kinda fed up but thats old comics for you#the winter soldier#i think he should be pissed about hydras logo not being a fukning hydra! thats an octopus🐙#hydras have multiple HEADS that grow back when they get cus off 🙄#mcu headcanons#marvel#mcu bucky barnes#captain america#steve rogers#the avengers#captain america the winter soldier#percy jackson#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo#also any of the aus with the Avengers being a demigods are so funny like imagine going from the battle of Manhattan in like 09 then less#then five years later 2012 the battle of ny happens!#Demigod Avenger: YOU'LL NEVER GUESS WHERE THE HELL IM FIGHTING THESE ALIENS!!!!!#Demigod: no idea#Demigod Avenger: BACK IN NEW FUCKING YORK!!!!! THIS GODS FORSAKEN CITY CANT CATCH A BRAKE!!!!#Demigod: 💀💀💀 but really do you need help?#Demigod Avenger: no im good. got my ambrosia and nector. its just trippy to not be fighting with you all this time.#Demigod: ok. call if you need us and we'll be there#Demigod Avenger: 🥰✌🥰#fanfic aus#alternate universe
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🖤🩶🤍💜
#my art lol#vocaloid#vocaloid fanart#kamui gakupo#gackpoid#camui gackpo#gakupo vocaloid#神威がくぽ#asexual#purple#black#alternate title: gakupo if he slayed LMAOOO#man i always forget about ace awareness week despite being a raging ace myself 💀 oops.#but anyways i got reminded. and gakupo keychain arrived yesterday... gakupo is purple.............. so this happened lmao#grrrr ONE DAY ill get good at drawing him 😭😭 i still feel like i suck and idk WHAT it is about him that makes him not work as well#in my style. but grrrrrr i will figure it out at some point... and i WILL git gud at drawing him. i need to. 😔😔😔 i lijke him...#i have those ace sunglasses irl btw LMAO its my only piece of ace merch... fucking $1 target sunglasses 💀💀 lmao. but at least SMTHN#the vision. guys. ace gakupo would be SOOOOOOOO powerful. trust me on this.#also i need to stop being too silly rn and lock the fuck INNN im so screwed lmfao. i got texted by a classmate while drawing this 😭#I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT TOMORROW I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABT AND HAVE TO SPEEDRUN. EMAILS. CONFERENCE. AHHH#save me pretty eggplant man.... oguhgghhh. the soundtrack was not helping while drawing this LMFAO. ily fucked up gakupo songs 💜
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my barbies 💗
#ha of course the plan was mimi and that western barbie cowgirl outfit like duhhh THE HAT AND THE PINK and the flare pants scream mimi#but my barbie agenda is barbie takeru and i cant…exactly put him in the other barbie outfits could i#barbie#digimon#digimon adventure#takeru takaishi#mimi tachikawa#digimon fanart#my art#eri draws#*#art#fanart#anime#alternate caption: making my brother regret not coming to the barbie party with us#i couldve simply put yama on that black ken outfit but i have a petty reason for not doing so and ill tell if you ask 🤣#or ill be laughing happily if you guess right#this being the only thing that kept me sane during my not so obvious disappearance phase#power outage my beloathed 💀 at the time this gets posted itll be 78 hrs 🫠#i miss my pc 😭😭😭#what id do now that this ones done but power isnt back yet 🥲
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What do English people call a close? You know, the stairwell bit where all the flats are in a tenement? If you go to visit someone at their flat, what do you call the bit where you wait for them to answer their door? That communal stairs… area?
("Modern AUs don't require research" MAYBE IF YOU'RE ENGLISH THEY DON'T 😭)
#no i can't google it that just gets me “word that mean the same as close: near; next-to; intimate” and so on#godddd it was bad enough to be reminded that they don't call juice 'juice' wasn't it#i think i should try to cut a chapter or two from my outline - at this rate when i finish 12 chapters there'll be 3 readers left for it 💀#but the POV alternates which complicates cutting whole chapters out. hrm.#...wait there's no rule that says you can only post one part at a time is there? i could do it in sets of 3 or something couldn't it?#and that way nobody's forced to wait a week or whatever for the crucial Actually They Are Scamming Each Other reveal at the start#also i am starting to rethink the 'finish it all first' approach as it turns out i hate sitting on finished chapters and just get impatient#SO WHAT IF... what if i write the first three chapters and post those and then worry about the rest of it later?#it leaves the scary chance of it staying a WIP forever but i don't think anyone's on the edge of their seats for a sylki scammer AU anyway#OKAY I'LL DO THAT (feel free to try to convince me not to tho)#wait do they even have tenements in that london#a while ago i found out my address contains an unacceptable character because tenements are mostly just a scottish thing#and i was like “oh so THAT'S why websites refuse to believe it could be a real flat number?” nae tenements ootside the central belt! wtf!#...how do you even fit flats into buildings there then? do yous just arrange them in some weird tardislike liminal space?#where do you keep the stairs then? D:#*strange hand movements as i attempt to map out this bizarre topology that is apparently normal everywhere else in the uk*
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hhhh talking about my writing was fun but 30 tags is not enough.. yes i have 3 major influences but i have minor ones too.. it is a lovechild of my favorite things.. writing is so fun and i have no self control or a concept of pacing myself i will sit there for 16 hours and get hit with every status effect but by god does it all just flow out of me. I've always been a music person yes but i also used to write a lot into early adulthood until The Incident™
but i am ready 2 jump back into it. i think comics are a great middle ground between the two mediums so i don't get As into writing bc i kind of started going crazy last time 🫡 i can take a more structured approach to it that forces me to pace myself and think about it differently. i love art.... i love making things i love knowing how to do things i love knowing how to play things i love having so many creative outlets, even if i don't do a lot of them regularly lol. it is enriching 😳 and nice to know that it's always there to come back to when u want.
#if u want the tea my imagination at the time was like i could space out and straight up just be another person POV doing every little#thing as if i were them for hours and the experience would come together without having to even think about it.#different times/places/contexts/conversations etc. forced 2 to to my mom's lil cult meetings for 2 hours twice a week#i would opt to do these imagination exercises instead to rly put myself in a character's perspective. every step‚ stumble‚#riding in a carriage together for the entirety from point A to B etc. WELL i was working on a horror anthology somewhere 18/19#(that had a small local following 🫶🏾) and it its concept was like the Twilight zone but a lot darker. it was called interdimensional#and the main recurring character never actually shows up in the story. they r an omnipresent god of death who exists everywhere but#exists outside of our realm‚ and it picks random people to reveal itself to as a symbol. it can be apparent or just in passing that#the entry's MC sees it in‚ it will appear on something somewhere and once it's brought up it's a cue to the reader that this person#has just been sent to an alternate reality that leads towards their inevitable death. for the character nothing ever changes immediately#but the different starts to creep its way in‚ as does death's approach at its crescendo but the path's i took to get there were 😨#and after enough entries i started to see the symbol irl and hallucinate some other stuff from my stories and it really scared me#and made me stop 🫡 but i think in retrospect i just went too hard on the imagination exercises and wished i tried cultivating it instead#give myself time to settle and get in control.. but alas‚ she has not written seriously since. to this day it still flows out of me if#i just sit down to do it‚ but i don't think I'm at risk of something like that happening again anymore :3 so yeah ♡ i am learning how to#draw and trying not 2 force it bc i want it to b fun as a little journey for me and i look forward to the day i can come back to actively#writing again too 🫶🏾 i miss it but i also want to b able to draw ૮₍ ˃ ⤙ ˂ ₎ა#learn the hard thing first then do the stuff that comes naturally.... i also want to get back into music sometime but clearly i got a lot of#other stuff to work on 💀 i burnt myself out on it learning too many things and not having enough fun with it anymore‚#but i have a better healthier with art these days and i know it'll be great to come back to when I'm ready 😌💕#i have been considering getting an acoustic or bass guitar tho 🧐 the beauty of physical instruments.. they're just there ready 2 go..#I've been doing mostly digital the past few years‚ when i was making music. it was also rly hard to when i was w my ex ૮ – ﻌ–ა#that's a whole other rant lol. but ugh digital is like u gotta set it up u gotta make space and then u gotta be in one spot the whole time#i just wanna lay in bed and vibe or something yfm.. walk around maybe idk. do something less structured.#maybe.. hm. hmmm 🧐#I'm going to guitar center lol c ya ✌🏾 getting a bass and amp and maybe a guitar too depending on the price
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i. havent won a 50-50. Since patch ONE POINT SIX . 💀
like First i get stuck doing a thing at work for like 2+ hours so i couldnt go take a coffee break and pull the second the banner dropped like id planned but it was fine whatever i was helping a coworker its cool. So then like at the End of the day im in the break room sitting at w a couple of ppl still around so i cant like react to it outwardly or anything . finally doing my scuffed mobile pulls just hoping for one W for once and a quick jade and. What fucking happens . like this shit cant be fucking serious 😭😭😭😭
Anyway then this happened at 25 pity immediately afterwards so i guess its like. Fine but actually . What the hell is the shit luck streak im on with 50-50s.......
i didnt even watch the pull animation play w this one 💀💀💀 i just skipped it and cue jade jumpscare . thanks ig idek what id have done if i genuinely couldnt get her day 1 despite prefarming actual 6/10/10/10 mats (mostly bc i was too busy to farm anything else than those on auto but eh)
im not even like a jade fan rly i think her design is a letdown its just the kit thats cool sjjsfsjdk and like free PF clears is neat i Do Love Me a FUA bullshit. i rly wish her design was more inspired than it is bc theres potential there and great elements like the black lace and hat but they just had to go the mid route all the way 🙄🙄 i like her VA also and her character is cool in theory its just a shame 2.3 was written like dogshit her included so...... but its ok i will appreciate her nonetheless .
#if i lose my next 50-50 im just. i dont even know . HOW#anyway she ate on PF 4 as expected alongside himeko (another queen) and we love to see it#also like. if my gacha luck isnt enough. i physically have not gotten a Single useable piece#of her planars . like 💀💀💀okay hoyo super funny cut it out now thanks#i got a better f*ref*y 2p from 3 weeks of farming than. the unit i actually wanted#like..... man.....#2.3 has been so bad like. worse story ending and botched writing than xianzhou#and shit luck everywhere..... oh well#like i wouldnt mind the planars as much if i. had a good alternative.#but theyre all iffy. if i take sigonia im robbing himekos stuff bc only 1 good atk rope.#im using salsotto for now but my orb is cringe as hell#its tough out here 😭😭😭#hsr#gaming tag
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first day of group therapy was uhhhhhh... interesting... 😬
#like it was fine it was OK but idk#i don't think this is gna be for me#it's a bit frustrating but this is why i was managing my expections. i had a feeling this wasn't gna be the way for for me :/#tomorrow morning ig i'll be calling the center to ask if there are any other alternatives? like 1 on 1 therapy options#and if all else fails i still have that one therapy appointment in july 💀
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📁 x 3 ( for linda )
send me a 📁 for a small random headcanon about my muse
when linda was a child, her sleep was often plagued by nightmares. her mother, back when she was still alive, would always come in to console her. linda would sob into her mothers elegant silk nightgown about nibbly’s and drowsy town’s and piggies and cinnabon’s. linda’s mother considered these ramblings to be nothing more than the product of a scared child’s sleep-deprived state. whenever her mother would try to hush her cries by assuring her it was only a bad dream, linda would insist: “no, it’s not a dream! it’s real! it’s real!” . . . . linda ‘outgrew her nightmares’ by the time she was eight, and does not remember them happening nor anything having to do with them.
to linda, worship and love go hand in hand, mutually exclusive. they are a yin and yang of sorts, one being unable to exist without the other, both having to be earned. this view was deeply embedded into her psyche by her father, who made it clear growing up with biting words and the refusal of hugs that this was his perspective, and never allowed linda to doubt its validity or believe otherwise. ( this view bleeds into her own parenting style, as her favorite child is usually mutually exclusive with the one who most adores her )
linda was young when she lost her mother, around age ten. she was very close with her mother, and it was as though a piece of herself had been forcefully and permanently ripped from her when she died. the death was deemed a tragic accident, with her car being pulled from out a lake near the witchwood forest. linda always felt that there was more to it, that the death was no mere accident, but her concerns were shot down by her father each and every time she tried voicing them to him. ever since she was a child, she’s snuck out to go sit in front of her mothers grave ( even now, married to gerald with their four boys, linda still sneaks away at night to go visit her grave, and neither gerald or their boys are any the wiser to these visits ) — a gravestone etched with little bees and honeycombs with the epitaph: hallowed wife, loving mother, and beloved honey queen.
#kinda false advertising about the SMALL part of the small and random headcanons i uh ended up kinda goin' to town on these 💀#i hope ur hungry for lore cause boy am i serving up a buffet of it asdjsk#i just have many thoughts and feelings about mother™#with all the timelines i thought it could be neat that some as children remember their lives in the alternate universes#like those stories & documentaries about reincarnated kids who remember their past lives#so uh ..... ✨voilà✨#parent loss tw#parent death tw#🎶 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐚𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐦𝐞 🪓 𝓛.𝓜. ・❥✐ ᶜʰᵃʳᵃᶜᵗᵉʳ ˢᵗᵘᵈʸ.
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👁️ 👁️ what is this “nmg au”? Tell me more?
🧍♂️🧍♂️🧍♂️💦💦💦 hides snippet under the cut (rambles in tags)
... It’s hard to tell what they’re feeling at times. Still, they shook his hand and introduced their name.
N.
A simple, one-lettered nickname. Unlike his, clearly inspired by his appearance; but he’s not complaining. Nightmare gave him a better nickname than what the multiverse did. ...
#ask#mb talks#mb rambles#ees my lil vent au......... just the typical found family nm gang au......... but my skelesona is also there...#(its just titled the au bc idk if i rlly wanna give it a name lol)#the gdoc i was looking at w that title has lust in it (😳) so LOL;;;#(perhaps alternate route or future plot where lust gets adopted to the fam haha)#honestly wanna focus on it again someday; and more on the wholesome side (its a little jumbled in my head and a bit hurt/comfort-y)#(but what vent au doesnt have a little bit of angst lol)#i remember my old lil doodles of it teehee aaah i wanna look at them againnn (<- missing the beloveds once again)#i love love LOVE my skelesona; sometimes he's like my son aurgh he's so CUTE!!! (ships them w the flirtiest pretty boy ever)#cross isn't the youngest in the gang anymore sooo the older bros move on to teasing their newest ~~(lil bro)~~ recruit—#— the silent guy w amnesia nm recently adopted!#(😱 'woag amnesia??' yeah idk either; pastme wanted 2 strt it like ur in a viddy game)#(smt smt dr vessel smt smt the actual amnesia horror game LOL)#i do remember having the idea of making the fic experimental and trying out some kinda cyoa type thing#'haha what if i do in on WP' 💀💀💀 dawg (but i think it's fun to try to do it on tumblr idk yet 🤔🤔🤔)
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damn. i didn't expect adastra to forever change me AGAIN on a second playthrough. i already knew what was gonna happen and that game still felt like a comically large boulder falling on top of my head
#qrevo.txt#shaking crying throwing up all over again#just for the record: i finished it. my soul is shattered#i would have tried to do the other endings; but it kinda snatches your hability to skip repeated text for too long of a stretch#also the alternate ending isn't that different from what i looked up. so like. whatever#can't wait to reexperience post-adastra depression 💀💀💀💀
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i always thought it was such an odd detail in bl3 when you get to atlas that tyreen calls and tells you “katagawa though he could win this war from an anti-grav swimming pool, so i had to give him a little push” (obviously referring to him coming to atlas in the zer0 suit)…? i’ve always wondered about that
#like does that mean the calypsos gave him the suit? is that where it came from? but its maliwan branded#or maybe they just convinced him to use it? like i always wonder what the alternative would have been#was he planning on blowing atlas up with the laser? the laser was still hacked. or maybe just send his own forces to overwhelm atlas hq?#its strange and kinda sad that he was essentially pushed into coming to atlas hq only to die … 💀#also funny imagining tyreen showing up/calling and kats laying in the pool crying about his blown up ship
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being a trans dude is kind of annoying because I think I could be a pretty girl but unfortunately I cannot be that and before you go "you can do that anyway" um I have ✨severe gender dysphoria✨
#i was gonna leave that last bit in the tags but i dont want people to miss it#like yeah i could look like a pretty girl but last time i was confronted with the possibility of having to wear a bra i had a panic attack#and doing a full face of makeup makes me feel sick#also im talking pretty in like a regular average person way not like an alternative way ya know which is way more dysphoria inducing#god gives his most snatched waists to his most dysphoric of trans men i stg 💀
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If you want the romance with another parent, you could always have his first husband be supportive but tragically pass away -- though maybe having a dead dad would distract from the dead mom trope
ooooo i think it wouldnt take away from it actually it might just be a horrible horrible tragedy that he escapes the dead mom trope but the. dad dies instead LMAO but no yeah it does take the focus away youre right.....
#i considered it and then like. in this hypothetical complete text he never Actually gets together with the new guy#because like. well it would be too fast lmao like theyre clearly Going to but it just doesnt happen in the span of the text#which might actually work because the focus isnt supposeddd to be the romance. but its offset by how much a partner dying might affect text#but then that could go into the difference of how a dead father is handled versus a dead mother.........................#but i dont think im big brained enough to talk about that LMAO#BUT!!! this is also all hypothetical so in this hypothetical world maybe i can LOL!!!!!#anon#ask#but yeah no i think. i would just need to have him. out of the picture.#i was already imagining like the mc meeting another trans guy who wants to Get pregnant and has a supportive partner#so like. its fine gahfdgbsdvghdfgb#have a nice day!!#there was also the alternative where the husband doesnt leave immediately. this is the least fun option#in that like. maybe he seems ok w it at the start but the more masculine the mc gets#the less supportive he is. until eventually they split#which is interesting but also 💀💀💀💀
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i literally cannot talk to new people, or like anyone other than my 1 friend
its so scary
#this is why i don't have a bf#this is the exact reason#and im a somewhat alternative queer in bumfuck no where#but mainly the talking thing#people have to message me first for like the first 2 weeks#and no one wants to do that i get it 💀#i wouldn't want to do that 💀#i don't expect people to do it for me i just gotta get outta this weird anxiety corner ife backed myself into#bugs junk
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queued up some feedback to try not to spam the dash but😭🫶 you are all so lovely and i cannot believe the love my little brain static idea has yielded, thank you so so much this means more than i can put into words
#I SOUND LIKE A SCRATCHED RECORD BUT I AM SO GENUINELY GRATEFUL#some writers i literally have adored for the longest time have left notes on this and I don’t know what to do with myself 💀💀💀#BECAUSE HELLO YOU HAVE PERCEIVED ME??? I AM BEING PERCEIVED#I AM JUST SOME GUY EXISTING. JUST A DUDE. A SPECK#im so weak goodbye#crawling back under my rock for a little while but every single one of u gets a kiss on the forehead or alternative affectionate display of#your own choosing <3#j talks.
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