#but it was much better than everyone said it would be
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brawberryz · 2 days ago
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Goodbye World
BatFam Yan! × neglected Magic Girl! Reader 《Platonic!》
Note:English is not my first language, sorry if there is any translation error
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You were going to die
You were going to die this way, alone and without anyone ever knowing of your existence, what a pathetic way to die
The magic had ended, it was only a matter of minutes before you became a witch you knew that the transformation was going to be painful and in a way you believed that you deserved this fate
You were the one who agreed to become a magical girl it is your fault, if your 14 year old self had known that this was the end maybe she would have rejected you
Now you were here, about to die, with no friends or family who cared about you
Family
You didn't know if you could call them that, they never cared about you they always left you aside and acted as if you didn't exist maybe they only did it unconsciously and they really cared about you, you knew that deep down for all of them you were just a burden and useless, they didn't tell you directly but they made you feel it and you believed that they were right to feel that way
Your mother never He was someone important, a prostitute who was lucky enough to sleep with Bruce Wayne himself, you knew he didn't even consider you a daughter, just a mistake, one of his many mistakes
Your siblings weren't that different from your father either, each one hurt and wounded you in different ways
Richard, the oldest considered himself the best, the oldest brother, he always bragged that he cared so much about his siblings that he would do anything for them
He was good to everyone except you, you wanted to believe that he cared about you but you knew it was a lie, he lies, he always lies and you knew it very well, maybe at that time you were too young to understand some things, but you knew that none of them considered you family
You still remember when he promised to go with you to the zoo, it was 5 years ago when you first arrived at the mansion, but he never kept the promise he was only good to you for the first few weeks then it seemed like he didn't care, he was just being good to you out of courtesy
Jason, you didn't have much to say about him, almost You didn't interact and if you did, he would just insult you and tell you to get out of his way while pushing you. You had heard that he had been revived and that thanks to that he now has that personality. You never got to meet him in person since when you arrived at the mansion he had already died.
You tried to get along with him, but it never worked. You always got an insult or a bad look from him. You never understood why he didn't like you. You never said anything to him. You were always good to him and what you received in return were insults. It wasn't fair.
Although, to be honest, nothing in your miserable life was fair.
Tim, you met him when Bruce brought him to the mansion, he was a year older than you but for the first time you thought you could have a friend your age, how wrong you were
At first he was distant, you thought it was because of his parents' death that he behaved that way, you gave him his space and tried not to be too annoying
But time passed and he simply spent his time ignoring your presence, you didn't understand what you had done to make him ignore you, you were good to him and treated him like a brother, why was everyone so mean to you?
When you tried to talk to him he would just tell you that he was busy or that you were being annoying, you knew that he had a lot of activities for being Red Robin, but deep down in your soul, you longed for him to look at you just for 1 second, to realize that he exists and that you are not just the shadow of the family
Damian, you welcomed him with open arms and gave him your support, you thought that since you were blood brothers you would get along better
But the only thing you received was that his katana almost pierced your head, his arrogant attitude and his enormous ego was something remarkable
He never missed an opportunity to tell you how pathetic you were and that you would never be worthy of being his family, that you were a shame, a disgrace that hammered the Wayne name
In a way he was right, you were never anyone just the bastard daughter of Bruce Wayne
With Barbara, Stehp and Cass you couldn't say much, Barbara was too busy with her affairs that she didn't even pay attention to you even though Sometimes she asked you how you were, but it was too weird
Stehp was neither good nor bad, she never treated you badly but she ignored you in some way, you never managed to talk to her directly, the only interactions you had with her were sidelong glances but nothing more
Cass, you hardly talk to her, but she was one of the few people who knew you existed, she was a person of few words although she seemed a little interested in you, but they never got to have a long conversation, just a few words like greetings or goodbyes
Your thoughts were cut off after hearing a voice, that damn voice...
"Do you have any last wishes, (name)?"
The cat spoke slowly approaching you, he was the one who had proposed you become a magical girl and you foolishly accepted, you thought that you finally had a true purpose that you could protect another like your family did, but you were too immature and stupid to realize the truth
"Yes...yes, I have one last wish."
You could barely speak, you felt like your body was heavy, it was like you had been stabbed in the back by more than 10 knives
"I hear you."
Kyubey looked too calm, and it was normal, they had already seen millions of magical girls die the same way
"I wish...I wish I could say goodbye to my father, please..."
That sounded more like a plea than a wish, in the back of your mind the only thing you wanted was for your dad to hug you, that this was all just a bad dream and tell you that everything was okay, but you knew it wasn't true
In a few seconds your vision went white and you were back in the halls of the mansion, in front of you was Bruce, walking backwards through the halls
You ran as fast as your legs could and when you reached him you gave him a big hug
Bruce He staggered at the sudden hug, he hadn't even noticed your presence or your steps
He turned his gaze and there you were, his daughter, hugging him tightly, as if you were afraid he would disappear
"(Name), is something wrong? I'm too busy to-"
Before he could speak again you quickly separated from him, you moved away a little before giving him a small smile
"I just wanted to hug a little, but anyway it's time to go"
You said as you stepped back a little
Leave? That word repeated itself in Bruce's head, what did you mean by leave? Before he could process everything you said something
"Oh, I almost forgot, take care of yourself okay? I don't like seeing you hurt"
You turned on your heels and then walked in the opposite direction and as you walked away and left a confused Bruce you shouted
"Hey dad! I love you..."
You said as you turned your head and gave him a sincere smile, you felt like tears were about to fall from your eyes
When you finished speaking you walked again and your presence disappeared the further you went down the halls of the mansion
_
That last interaction with you left him thinking, did you mean when you said "leave"? Even if he tried to concentrate on the cases in the Batcave, it was impossible, he needed answers and he knew where he could get them.
He walked through the halls of the mansion again while looking for your room, but he didn't remember it, how could he forget something so important? He's supposed to be your father but he doesn't even remember your age, the last time he saw you you were so little, a scared little girl who clung to his legs
How much had he missed? But this time it was going to be different
There would be room after room but they all looked the same, until he found one in particular, it was small and it was far from all the other main rooms
It was decorated in pink and lots of fluffy stuffed animals, but something was wrong
You weren't there, you were supposed to always spend your time in your room since you preferred to study from home, or that's what Alfred told him, but there was nothing it's like you had disappeared
He quickly went down the stairs, maybe you were in the kitchen
But to his surprise all the family members were there, except you...
"Has anyone seen (name)?"
Bruce said trying to stay calm, he had searched the entire mansion but there was no trace of you
"Why do you ask?"
Richard seemed indifferent to the question, he didn't understand why Bruce was so nervous
"I've been looking for her but she's nowhere to be found"
Bruce held on to the door, for some reason he felt too nervous, the thought that you might have left or that something might have happened to you made his stomach turn in a bad way
"You worry too much, Bruce, she's probably gone"
Jason spoke while leaning back in his chair, if he was honest he never paid much attention to you, he wondered what had happened to make Bruce so hysterical
"You don't understand, she never leaves the mansion"
Bruce decided to raise his voice, he didn't understand why out of nowhere everyone was so indifferent to you, something too hypocritical seeing from him since he was the one who ignored you first
"You worry too much B, I put a GPS on her a while ago, wherever she is I'll find her"
Tim spoke while writing on his phone computer, his confident tone disappeared as soon as he saw something on his laptop
"What's wrong, it seems like you've seen a ghost"
Jason joked looking at Tim
"I...I can't find her"
Tim didn't understand what was happening, it's like you've disappeared from the face of the earth as if nothing
"What do you mean you can't find her?"
Richard spoke now worried looking at Tim, how was it possible that you disappeared the GPS was too well hidden for you to take it out, something was happening and he didn't like it
"I can't find her I'm serious! It's like... like her existence had completely disappeared"
Tim tried to look for some sign of you but there was nothing, it's like you'd never existed
Everyone turned to look, missing? How was that possible, you never left the mansion and now as if nothing happened you disappeared
"Missing?"
Damian repeated angrily but at the same time, how dare you disappear like this? You are supposed to be his older sister, you should stay in the mansion with him, by his side, but you decided to leave like an idiot.
Somewhat hypocritical on his part since most of the time he spent his time saying that you would never be his sister, ironies of life, right?
Something inside them lit up, the thought of someone or something doing something to their sister made their blood boil
They were going to find you and they were going to make the person who took you away from them pay, you would never abandon them, right?
You always cared for them so much and loved them, you would never leave them alone like this, they are your family
It didn't matter if they had to get their hands dirty, they were going to bring you home no matter what, even if it meant having to put their morals aside
How stupid were they, they left you aside for so long and now they want you back?
What a shame that no one told them that they had lost you forever and that you were never coming back, never...
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My life if I made my readers insert live a miserable life full of trauma was a sport.
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finelinevogue · 21 hours ago
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lucky to have you
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summary - you and harry raise a glass on an italian beach to celebrate his birthday
word count - >1k
pairing - harry styles x wife!reader
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“To 31!”
You cheered your plastic cup, filled with beer, with Harry’s.
“And to many more.” Harry added, before you both swung back your beers.
Both of you were on the little beach you’d discovered in the years you had been coming back to Italy. It was a small beach, more like an alcove, but it felt like yours. No one had ever turned up when you’d visited and that’s what made it feel private.
You were sat cross legged on your beach towel and Harry was laid on his side, propped up by his arm, on his.
He looked a dream at 31.
You wrapped his cardigan around you a bit tighter as another breeze came across you both.
Harry put down his cup of beer and reached for another piece of cheese from the picnic.
It was only a small spread, but you’d wanted to create something fun and intimate to celebrate his birthday and a picnic was the perfect idea for it. There was cheese cubes, salami for you, a loaf of fresh bread and a selection of fruits for dessert.
Harry popped the slice of cheese in his mouth and you watched him whilst drinking more of your beer.
“What?” He asked whilst chewing.
“Ew. Eat with your mouth closed.” You giggled.
Harry rolled his eyes but he did have better manners than that, so he waited until he was finished before asking again.
“What are you looking at?”
“You.” You smiled.
“Me?”
You laughed at his ignorance. He really had no clue how good he looked it was infuriating. It was often a losing battle when you were out because everyone looked at him. Yet, he only ever looked at you.
You nodded with a dazed smile.
“You’re too handsome.”
Harry chuckled, tilting his head down to hide his blush. Even after all these years you could still cause him to flush over a silly comment.
“You’re so annoying.” He chuckled.
“Why?”
“You always know what to say to make me blush. Makes me feel like a high school teenager with a crush all over again.” He admitted, looking back at you so you could see the sincerity in his eyes.
“You know? My high school crush ditched me on valentine’s day.”
“What?”
“Yeah. Supposedly was going to meet him at this local cafe for a coffee and then we were going to watch a movie, but he ditched last minute. He said something had come up.” You shook your head.
Harry tutted, glad that guys like that didn’t get to mistreat you anymore. He would never even question doing something like that to you.
He loved you too much.
“Well I don’t plan on ditching you this valentine’s day.”
“And that’s why I married you.” You made a pleased noise to yourself.
You had definitely married the right guy. There was no question about that. It wasn’t even a case of Harry being perfect, because he wasn’t always, but it’s just that he was perfect for you.
The way your similarities, dislikes and general personalities mesh together was just perfect. That’s why there was constantly so much love and affection between you too. There was so much of you within each other and it felt so natural to be together as a result of that.
“What should we do this year?” You asked, wiggling your toes into the sand.
“For valentines day?”
“Mhm.”
“What do you want to do? I’ll take you anywhere but that horrible restaurant we went to last year.” Harry laughed, taking a sip of his beer.
“Please. Never again.” You chuckled with him.
Both of you went quiet as you thought through various options.
“What if we stayed here?” You asked, bringing your knees up to your chest so you could rest a cheek on one of them. You looked at him hopefully.
“Exactly here? Or somewhere else in Italy?” Harry asked as he sat up.
“Right here. I like it here.”
“I know you do.” He smiled.
He knew you were thinking back to when he proposed to you right here on this very beach - hence why you had such a strong attachment to it. That’s why you pretended it was your private beach.
“So… Can we?”
“‘Course.” He nodded. “C’mere.”
You didn’t need to be told twice before you raced to sit on top of him straddling his waist as both of you sat up straight.
Harry’s hands tucked neatly around your back and held you tight against him, whilst yours winded up around his neck and messed with the growing hair there.
“Love you.” You whispered.
“Love you too.” He smiled a little, small, smile. One that you craved too much to leave alone which is why you leant in to kiss him.
His lips were soft from the warm weather. You pressed yourself into him as he took control of the kiss, leaning forwards when he leant back a bit. Neither of you minded how messy and awkward the kiss was, it was nice to just be like this in the open.
You tugged on his hair as he bit your lip, making you gasp and rock your body forwards slightly. His hands gripped your hips to keep you steady.
Harry broke away from you first, kissing you a couple times extra before moving his head a distance away from yours.
You pouted as he left you.
“Don’t give me that.” He chuckled at your pout, eyes not being able to choose between looking at your lips or eyes.
“But…”
“It’s my birthday.” He argued.
You rolled your eyes with a smile, feeling ridiculously lucky to be loved by him.
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littlecorspe · 2 days ago
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Everyone in the reblogs & tags is dogging on this random for not having voted for Harris, for making her own grave and not being happy to lie in it, for being "arrogant" in thinking the democrats should do anything about the state of our country after she didn't vote for them etc. etc.
And I feel like this kind of behaviour proves the point of people like this?
I could be completely wrong, she could literally just be a psyop (and I think that's what's most likely tbh) lmao, but I feel like this was the take of a lot of people who were disillusioned w the party they would have otherwise been voting for.
And if that party's response to losing the election is "boo hoo, we lost & it's actually your fault & now we're all on a sinking ship & we're just gonna watch & do nothing about it because boohoo we lost" It shows precisely just another reason why people would be disillusioned with it.
And then so much of the stuff said in the tags just shines with hypocrisy? "You just don't care enough about women to disregard all the other unsatisfactory shit and that makes you selfish." Uhhh, okay, by that point, you don't care enough about Palestinian lives, or other xyz group or issue to disregard all the other unsatisfactory shit & are being selfish, like??? That just puts yall on two sides of the same coin, no one is right here?
& then the people who are like "Where is your precious Jill Stein?" Like? 💀
Where is our girlboss Kamala rn? Paying someone to update her website?
Why is your argument "Go to Jill Stein" but the same standard can't be expected from the candidate you voted for? To step up and do something, even though they lost the election?
Are they equal candidates that both equally deserved votes, thus we should be holding the two to the same standard?
Or was Harris clearly the better of the two candidates; thus we should be holding her and the democratic party to a higher standard & expect them to be doing more than they are right now?
I just fucking hate that the response of this fucking party is to cry about losing, and then be satisfied to sit around and point fingers at meaningless civilians while the country literally burns around them, instead of continuing to push for change & improvement, and ask for more from their party, even if they did lose the election.
Someone in the reblogs was like "my family lived through WWII and they knew if you didn't vote for the lesser of 2 evils you were voting for the nazis" and I bet they also knew that if the nazis won, the next step would be to collect themselves, wipe their tears away, and then pick themselves up by their bootstraps and get to work on doing whatever they could to resist, and to minimize the damage to come. Sitting around and pointing fingers for the next four years would not have been an option.
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captain-bubble-wrap · 1 day ago
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HELP ME PLEASE
Your quinn is literally my favorite!!!!!!!!!!! Can you write him and reader!girlfriend on the phone after the stars game? Your sweet/sad quinn is the best!!!!!!!!!
Oh, you're WAY TO KIND TO ME...! 🥹🥹 Let's see what I can do!
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All you had texted was, "I love you."
Incoming Call: Quinny
Quinn's broken voice in that post-game interview had killed you. The way he had looked down before answering about how he was feeling, his thoughts on Millsy's trade, and how he was handling the noise of the dressing room as the team's captain -- it was obvious how much it all was affecting him. Unfortunately, you were twenty-two-hundred miles away, and you felt powerless to help him in any form.
"Hey, baby," you said upon answering the call.
Quinn's voice was low, and it was obvious he was beyond exhausted, body and mind, "Do you have a minute?"
"Of course." Your stomach tightened like you were about to receive some bad news. You hadn't heard him sound this way before and given how the day had gone, you knew it wasn't going to be a butterfly-inducing conversation.
"Let me get somewhere a little quieter. I need to hear your voice."
To you, he sounded desperate -- like he was at his breaking point. While you waited for him to walk to wherever he needed to be, you couldn't help but worry about him -- about what had caused him pain during the game, how losing JT and the others was weighing on him, and the stress of the upcoming tournament that was just four games away. You couldn't get the sad look of his face out of your mind. When was the last time he had actually had a good day, that he was happy without nagging stresses?
"Hey Mike, I'm gonna step out for a few minutes," Quinn said, obviously not talking to you. You couldn't hear the other man's reply but it must have been favourable as Quinn would finally start his conversation with you just a few seconds afterwards.
He sighed heavily, "I wish you were here. I-- I feel like everything is out of control and I don't know what to do."
The sound of wind was intertwined with his words. You wondered if he had stepped outside the arena to talk to you, somewhere to speak without listening ears.
"I wish I was there, too," you confessed, a pain growing in your heart. "You're trying to carry too much, baby."
"I have no choice, though."
You knew where he was coming from. The title of Captain meant you wore several hats, and sometimes more than one at a time. You knew he had all of them on at once. This season hadn't been easy, and something had you believing it wasn't going to get any better.
"I know," you mumbled. "I'm sorry."
"It's not your fault," he breathed out, feeling guilty for calling you when he was feeling like he was. "I'm sorry to put this on you. I just don't know what to do. Everyone is looking to me for answers and insight, but I don't have any. I don't know how to fix the team, I'm carrying as much as I can every night. I'm asked about what's going on behind closed doors and the temperature of the room and I'm over it. It's like the media just wants to keep stirring the pot instead of letting us just work it out. Now I'm being asked about if the team rebuilds what that means for my future in Vancouver. I-- I just-- I can't-- handle everything right now." Your heart was breaking hearing him on the brink of tears. His voice was cracking and shaky. "I need you."
"I wish I was there, sweetheart. I'd do anything I could to help you."
"I love you," his voice at a whisper.
"I love you, too, Quinn."
The first whimper made you cover your mouth to keep yourself from doing the same. Quinn rarely cried, at least not when you were around. To hear him finally drop that ultra-reserved demeanour of his was crushing.
"Oh honey, you'll be okay," you tried to reassure him, but they were words without certainty, you knew that. "You're doing the best you can, and you need to realise that you need to put yourself first sometimes. You're pushing yourself too much. It's not on you to solely fix the team, Quinn, though I know you're trying. I've never seen you this way before, and I'm scared it's going to break you."
He was silent on the other end, aside from his muffled cries. You didn't need him to say anything, though hearing his voice would have made you feel better, which made you remember what he had said to you earlier: "I need to hear your voice."
Maybe he just needed you to talk to him.
"One day at a time, baby, please. Be happy where you are, and what you have. You're doing all you can, and I need you to know that it's okay to struggle, but it's also okay to be content with how things are. You know there are things out of your control, and you just have to let them work themselves out sometimes. You'll drive yourself crazy trying to put bandaids on everything. I don't want to lose you down that rabbit hole." You'd pause before adding one more thing, "I just want you to be okay."
Quietly you'd sit there and wait for a sign from him, or whatever it might be. A long moment of silence would follow your words, making you pull the phone away from your ear to make sure the call hadn't dropped.
"I miss you," he choked out, breaking the painful silence between the two of you.
"I miss you more, Quinn. I wish you were here."
"Me, too," he said, sharply inhaling, like he was trying to push those emotions back down and get over it. "Thank you for picking up everything -- the call, the pieces...me. I'd be so lost without you."
You'd shake your head, "You never have to thank me, baby. I just want to help you."
"I appreciate that," he sniffled. "I just wish I knew where to start."
"With yourself, Quinn," you said bluntly. "How are you feeling? I saw you take the stick to the head early."
It took him a few seconds to respond but you didn't mind, "I don't know, honestly. Between my hand and whatever is wrong with my leg, everything hurts. I'm tired. I'm drained. I wish I was home with you."
Everything he said carried so much weight and his emotions were so painfully honestly.
That was just Quinn.
He always spoke from his heart; wearing his heart on his sleeve every waking moment of his life. However this had a different air about it -- a nakedness. He was free to share his deepest fears with you, those raw feelings were bleeding from him with no hindrance. You appreciated that he felt so comfortable to open up like he was, and the fact that he was away from you, as well. Quinn didn't give the hint that he shared stuff like this with the guys on the team -- not like he did with you. You were different. He loved you -- you occupied a special piece of his heart like no on else did. That meant something special to him.
"You'll be home soon, baby. Just a little longer, okay?"
Through Quinn's end of line, someone was calling out to him, "C'mon Quinn-- the boy's are packing up, let's go."
You frowned hearing the empty orders, but you knew Quinn would have to end the call with you and head to the airport. There was always a sense of urgency after their games, especially the away ones.
"Yeah-- I'll be right there," he muttered, his voice dropping off at the end while he pretended to have himself together. "I'll call you when we get back to Vancouver."
"Be careful."
"I will," he paused. "Thanks, babe. For all that you do for me."
"Happy to help, Quinny. I love you."
For the first time, you heard his little giggle, "I love you, too."
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pnutbutter-n-j-elyy · 3 days ago
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When You Call Them Clingy| Hyungline Pt2
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Hyungline x Gn! Reader
(sorry this took like forever lmao ive been going through it in life unfortunately💀💀💀 )
Bangchan
The hum of the studio was still present, but now it felt different- less like a comforting embrace and more like static electricity prickling your skin.
The once-warm atmosphere had turned cold, muted, and the silence stretched like a chasm between you and Chan.
He didn’t ask if you needed anything anymore. He didn’t look at you at all.
The first hour after your slip-up had been the worst. You’d sat there, staring at the screen of your phone, scrolling aimlessly to avoid looking at him. But your thoughts betrayed you, circling back to the look on his face when you’d called him clingy- the hurt in his eyes, the faint slump of his shoulders, the way his movements slowed, as though your words had drained the energy out of him.
This is almost unbearable... You thought to yourself. I've never been uncomfortable around Chris before, rather the complete opposite...I don't like this.
You had apologized in your head a dozen times already, running over how you could bring it up without making things worse. But every time you glanced his way, you found yourself frozen, the words dying in your throat.
I was harsh...I'm feel horrible...
Chan wasn’t usually one to sulk, but this was different. He didn’t seem angry-he didn’t snap or lash out.
Although you wished he would have. It may have been better than this thick tension.
But instead of yelling or cursing, he buried himself in his work, shutting you out completely. His usual hums and absentminded muttering as he worked were nowhere to be found. The tapping of keys and the occasional adjustment of a dial were the only sounds that filled the room.
It felt unbearable.
After almost two hours of sitting in silence, the tension was too much. You shifted in your chair, swallowing the lump in your throat as you finally spoke up.
“Chan,” you said softly, your voice hesitant.
He didn’t respond immediately. His fingers paused over the keyboard, but he didn’t turn to look at you.
“Yeah?” he said, his tone neutral- too neutral.
You winced. “I didn’t mean to sound so harsh earlier. I-” You rushed out.
“It’s fine,” he cut you off, his voice tight, clipped.
But it wasn’t fine. You could hear it in the way his words came out too quickly, the way he immediately went back to typing as though he hadn’t just brushed you off.
Serves me right...
You tried again. “It’s not fine. I shouldn’t have said that.”
He let out a breath, finally turning his chair to face you. His expression was guarded, a carefully constructed mask of calm, but his eyes gave him away.
“Look,” he said, his voice soft but firm. “I get it. I was being overbearing. I just…I thought I was helping. I'll ease up from now on."
The words hit you like a punch to the chest. He wasn’t trying to defend himself- he was agreeing with you, accepting blame where there wasn’t any to take.
And you didn't want him to agree.
“You- you were helping,” you said quickly. “I was just… overwhelmed, and I didn’t think before I spoke. I-I don't want you to ease up...I love you the way you are.”
Chan nodded slowly, but the way his jaw tightened told you he wasn’t convinced.
“Sometimes I overdo it,” he said, a small, self-deprecating smile tugging at the corner of his lips. “I don’t know how to…not worry about the people I care about. Or love.”
Your heart sank. He wasn’t just talking about you. He was talking about himself, about how he carried the weight of everyone’s needs on his shoulders, even when it wasn’t his responsibility.
“And I made you feel like you couldn’t breathe,” he added, almost to himself.
“No,” you said quickly, leaning forward. “That’s not what I meant. You’re always so thoughtful, Chan. I just…” You trailed off, struggling to put your feelings into words. "I...uh...damn it..."
He tilted his head, waiting for you to continue, but there was a distance in his gaze now- an invisible barrier you hadn’t seen before.
“I don’t want you to feel like you’re doing something wrong,” you said finally, your voice trembling. “Because you’re not. I was just having a bad day, and I-”
“Don’t worry about it,” he interrupted again, standing abruptly. “It’s getting late. I should wrap this up anyway.”
You blinked, startled by the sudden shift in his tone.
It wasn’t angry, but it was dismissive.
Final.
“Chan-”
“Seriously, it’s fine,” he said, forcing a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “You should get some rest. I’ll finish up here.”
The dismissal stung more than you expected. You stood up, hesitating for a moment, unsure if you should push further or give him space. But the way he had already turned back to his desk made the decision for you.
“Okay,” you said quietly, your voice barely audible.
You grabbed your bag and made your way to the door, glancing back one last time. Chan was hunched over his keyboard, his back to you, the soft glow of the monitor casting shadows across his face.
“Goodnight,” you murmured.
He didn’t respond.
As you headed out he called out.
"Y/N."
You turned towards him, hopeful.
"You don't have to come tomorrow. Ji...sung-ah and...Innie-ah are supposed to be here to work on something with me."
You sighed and bit the inside part of your lip. He was terrible at lying.
Then a small rush of unrighteous anger hit you.
"Thats okay, I had plans anyways." You shot back, leaving. You almost missed the surprised look as he lifted his head from his bag.
The walk home was a blur. The guilt in your chest felt heavier with every step, suffocating you until you could hardly breathe.
But now that guilt stemmed from also saying something to purposefully provoke him.
Why would I even say that? I have no reason to be mad- but he...he has all the reason to be.
You thought about texting him, but what could you say? Nothing you typed out felt like enough. Apologizing once wasn’t going to fix this.
And you were too prideful to admit your pettiness.
It's embarrassing...
When you finally got home, you dropped your bag by the door and sank onto the couch, burying your face in your hands. You replayed all the moments over and over in your head, wishing you could go back and choose different words, wishing you could make him understand how much he meant to you.
But then your anger driven words hit you. You just loved digging yourself deeper graves. So, you pulled out your phone and shot a text.
Deciding that if you were at a standstill with each other, you at least wouldn't lie to him.
——————————————————————————
Minho
The next morning, you woke up feeling a mix of guilt and lingering irritation. Sleep hadn’t come easy, your mind replaying the events from the previous night like a broken record. You had lashed out, hurt him, and now there was this gnawing uncertainty about where things stood.
You debated texting Minho to apologize, but the thought of his cold tone from last night stopped you. The memory of his quick, hollow kiss on your temple was like a dull ache in your chest- a reminder of how much damage had been done.
You sighed as you reached for your phone, jumping when you see a text from Minho.
Minho: Dori didn't even wait for me to finish preparing his breakfast before eating Soonie's. Such a menace.
You stared at the text for a long moment, unsure of what to make of it. It wasn’t unusual for him to send updates about his cats, but this felt like an attempt to return to normalcy without directly addressing what had happened.
Should I respond? Should I apologize? You wanted to, but the thought of putting your emotions into words felt daunting.
Instead, you liked the message, telling yourself you’d figure it out later. But as the day dragged on, and you found yourself unable to focus on anything. By the evening, your phone buzzed, breaking you from your thoughts.
Minho: Did you eat?
The question was simple, almost routine, but it held a strange weight. And you were unsure how to respond.
Was this his way of reaching out, or was he just trying to check a box out of habit?
You hesitated before typing back: You: Yeah. Did you?
His reply came almost immediately: Minho: Mhm. Chan-hyung made japchae. Ate while working. Minho: Also, three cups of pudding.
You couldn't help but let out a little giggle. You could picture him in his studio, his face reflected in a the mirrors, as he sat crisscross on the dance floor, scribbling choreo ideas, spoon in one hand and a cup of pudding beside him. The image tugged at your heartstrings in the way only a lover could do.
You: Busy day? Minho: Always.
You sighed and rested your head on the back of your couch.
Short. Not necessarily clipped, but there were no teasing or playful jabs. No emojis. Just facts. It felt so unlike him, and it hurt more than you wanted to admit.
You could feel the awkwardness as if he was sitting in the room with you.
You: I’m sorry about last night. You typed out a response, then deleted it, then typed it again. Finally, you settled on: You: I miss you.
The three dots signaling his response appeared, then disappeared, then reappeared. You held your breath, waiting.
Minho: Yeah...
You: I'm sorry.
Minho: It's fine.
It wasn’t fine. You knew that. The lack of warmth in his reply was enough to confirm it.
You: It doesn’t feel fine. Minho: Maybe it’s not...
There it was. The crack in the veneer. Your chest tightened as you stared at his words. You wanted to fix it, to make it right, but you didn’t know how.
You: Can we talk? Minho: Not right now. I’m tired.
The conversation ended there. You stared at the screen long after his reply, the words “I’m tired” echoing in your mind. It wasn’t just physical exhaustion he was talking about. He was emotionally drained, and you were the reason.
You: Okay, goodnight. I love you. Minho: Night. I love you too.
Over the next two weeks, things didn't get much better.
You hadn't seen him in person, and only had a few video calls where anytime you tried to bring up an apology, Minho deflected the conversation.
It felt like more of an awkward and intimate friendship interacting rather than a couple. And you needed to change that. You couldn't handle it. You missed your boyfriend.
Minho had always been steady, a constant in your life. You hadn’t realized how much of a lifeline he was until you cut it with a single careless word.
Clingy.
The way his expression had shifted when you said it- it haunted you. Minho, who rarely let his emotions crack the surface, had been hurt. You’d seen it, felt it in the way he pulled back from you. And you wanted to pull him back towards you.
That’s what brought you to his house a few nights later, your chest tight with desperation and dread. You didn’t have a plan, just a need to be near him, to try and fix what you’d broken.
The porch light cast a faint glow as you arrived, the sight of it familiar yet unsettling. You hesitated at the keypad, your fingers trembling as you entered the code. For a moment, you feared he might have changed it, but the lock clicked open with a soft, mechanical hum.
The sound felt louder than it should have in the quiet night, and your heart ached with the thought that you still knew this house so well.
You stepped inside, the warmth of the entryway doing little to ease the chill in your bones.
“Minho?” Dori was the only cat by the door, immediately rushing to you to rub up against your legs. "Min?"
Your voice was soft, tentative, as you slipped off your shoes and into slippers, but it went unanswered.
The faint murmur of voices reached you from the living room. You moved toward the sound, your footsteps hesitant.
And then you saw them.
She was sitting on the couch, her laughter carrying easily in the stillness of the house.
Minho was beside her, close enough that the space between them seemed insignificant. His expression, one that had been so cold and was open-relaxed in a way you hadn’t seen in minute.
Your stomach twisted painfully, the scene before you crashing down like a tidal wave.
You must have made a sound, because Minho’s head turned sharply in your direction. His eyes widened, surprise etched across his face.
“Y/N?”
The girl followed his gaze, her expression a mix of confusion and mild curiosity.
You froze, your pulse hammering in your ears.
“I-” The words caught in your throat, your mind scrambling to come up with an explanation for why you were here, standing uninvited in his doorway.
“Y/N-ah, wait-” He said, scrambling up from the couch, tripping over Dori who had decided to join the party.
But you were already backing away.
“I didn’t mean to interrupt,” you said quickly, your voice cracking as you stumbled toward the door. You knocked into the cats water bowl, soaking your feet. The lump in your throat threatened to choke you, but you forced the words out. “I’ll just- go.”
Minho reached for you, his movements sharp and deliberate. “Don’t-”
You didn’t wait for him to finish, pulling away. The door slammed shut behind you, the cold air biting at your skin as you stepped into the night.
You didn’t realize you were still wearing the house shoes Minho had bought for you months ago until you were halfway down the street, your steps uneven on the pavement. The absurdity of it made your throat tighten, but the tears came before the laughter could.
Your vision blurred as you walked aimlessly, the weight in your chest pressing down until it felt hard to breathe. You could still see her face, hear her laugh. It was seared into your mind.
There is no way he could have moved on in just two weeks...right?
Could he have...no. Never.
But had he?
You didn’t know either way. And you couldn’t bring yourself to stay long enough to find out.
Back at the house, Minho stood frozen by the door. Doongie let out a soft mew, as if speaking.
"I know..." Minho said to the cat.
His jaw clenched as he stared at the space where you’d been, staring at where your shoes were left, your sudden departure leaving a suffocating silence along with them.
“Minho?” the girl called hesitantly, her voice breaking through the tension.
He turned to her, his expression unreadable.
“You should go.” he said finally, his tone flat.
Her brows furrowed in confusion, but she didn’t argue. She gathered her things quickly, giving Doongie a quick scratch, the sound of her footsteps fading as the door closed behind her.
Minho sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair as he leaned against the wall. His gaze fell to the floor, and for the first time, he noticed the trail of damp footprints leading to the door- proof of your hurried escape.
You hadn’t even waited to hear him out.
He wanted to chase after you, to get an explanation for why you’d come in the first place.
But he didn’t move. Instead, he stood there in the silence, the weight of your absence pressing down on him; and he was stuck wondering how something you caused had now become a snowballed issue he needed to resolve.
——————————————————————————
Changbin
You sat there frozen, the echo of his quiet, defeated tone playing on a loop in your mind. It wasn’t like him to leave like that- without a fight, without reassurance, without trying to smooth things over. He had always been one to want to ease conflict in the calmest manner.
Your eyes drifted to the coffee table where his phone sat, screen dark and mocking in the dim light. He must’ve forgotten it in his rush to leave, and the realization sent a pang of guilt straight to your chest. You couldn’t even call him to try and make things right.
With trembling hands, you picked up his phone, turning it over in your palm. It was a small, insignificant thing, but it felt like the only connection you still had to him.
The weight of Hyunjin’s text was heavier now, replaying in your mind like a cruel taunt.
He had planned to propose tonight.
And you had ruined it.
You pressed the phone to your chest, swallowing hard against the lump in your throat. You couldn’t stop picturing the way his face had fallen, the light in his eyes dimming with every word you’d said. The warmth he carried with him, the energy that filled every room he walked into, was gone. And it made you feel terrible.
Your hands tightened around his phone as you leaned back on the couch, your thoughts spiraling. Changbin wasn’t just a boyfriend- he was your safe space, your biggest cheerleader, the person who always knew how to make you laugh when you wanted to cry.
And tonight, you had been the one to make him feel small.
You let out a shaky breath, blinking back the tears threatening to spill over. There was no way you could let things stay like this.
So, you got to work.
--
Changbin’s car coasted slowly down the street, the low hum of the engine the only sound in the otherwise quiet night. His mind buzzed, replaying every moment of the evening- your harsh words, the hurt in his chest, and the sudden shift in the air between you two. He could still feel the weight of your gaze, and your frustration.
He had tried so hard.
Maybe it is my fault...
He wanted to make the night perfect, make it something to remember. A sweet cute, relaxed proposal. Soft and warm and everything that represented the love he had for you.
But now he was left uncertain, second-guessing everything. The familiar streets blurred as his thoughts swirled, mixing with the disappointment and confusion still lodged in his heart. His grip tightened around the steering wheel.
As he pulled into his driveway, he killed the engine but didn’t immediately move. He sat there for a while, the headlights casting long shadows across the pavement. It was cold, but he didn’t feel it. Instead, his chest was heavy, a knot of frustration and sorrow gnawing at him.
I need to apologize. Maybe then-
Reaching for his phone, he noticed a slight tremor in his hands.
Is that the best thing to do though...what if Y/N-ie is still mad...
He spent the next couple minutes thinking about texting you- even though he hadn’t done anything inherintantly wrong.
But the thought of sending an apology and admitting to a fault he didn’t deserve seemed like the easiest way to get things back to normal.
He swiped the phone screen on, but his stomach dropped when he saw his empty hand. He reached to pat his pockets.
He didn’t have his phone with him.
He trailed his eyes at the empty seat next to him, hoping maybe it was there, as the realization hit him harder than it should’ve.
His phone was still on the couch at your place. He must’ve left it there in the rush to get away.
"Shit," he muttered under his breath, the frustration and anxiety rising again.
He shifted the car back into gear, pulling out of his driveway and heading back to your apartment. As he drove, he let out a deep sigh, trying to shake off the weight pressing on him.
He didn’t know what to expect when he saw you again. He didn’t even know what he wanted from the rest of this night.
Back at your place, you were busy, but not in the way you had planned. You paced the living room, biting your lip as you nervously looked over the decorations you had hastily thrown together. You had wanted everything to be perfect for him, the way he’d promised it would be tonight, but now… you were the one fixing things.
You were the one putting the final touches on a proposal- his proposal.
Your heart flipped over and over in your chest, as you adjusted things anxiously.
You had to scrounge through a ton of different leftover decorations from previous events and holidays; and it looked like the spirit of every celebratory occasion had thrown up over your living room.
You had tried so hard to get it right, to show him how sorry you were that your nerves and selfishness had ruined everything.
When you heard the distant rumble of his car approaching, your heart skipped a beat. You quickly fixed your hair and wiped your hands on your pants, as if trying to make up for everything all at once.
You hadn’t planned this, hadn’t thought through how you were going to apologize. You just knew you couldn’t let him walk away- couldn’t let him leave the night without fixing at least a small part of it.
The doorbell rang, and you froze, your pulse quickening in your throat.
You opened it, and there he was. Changbin. Standing there with an unreadable expression, his eyes flicking over your face before he looked down at the phone in his hand.
You didn't know if you imagined his red rimmed eyes.
“I-” he started, but the words faltered. He opened his mouth again, as if trying to say something, but nothing came out. "I left my phone."
You handed it to him, and he stood there awkwardly turning it in his hands.
"Bin, come in," you whispered, stepping aside to let him in.
He hesitated for a long moment, his feet still on the other side of the threshold, as if he were debating whether to leave or stay. You could see the tension in his shoulders, the uncertainty in his movements.
But then, with a deep sigh, he stepped inside.
You led him to the living room. His eyes stayed on the floor. He didn’t sit down, didn’t speak, just stood there.
"Y/N, I'm sor-"
"You don’t need to apologize," you said, voice barely audible as you walked toward him. You didn’t know how else to start. "I’m the one who messed up tonight. It wasn't you. It was all me."
Changbin shook his head, though it seemed like he was trying to process what he was feeling. He opened his mouth again, his voice hoarse. "No, it wasn't you. I…I didn’t mean for-"
"Changbin, don't fool yourself." You said with a sarcastic chuckle. "You know it was all my fault-"
"Y/N I was the one who was-"
"-I ruined your proposal. Of course it's my fault." You finished.
Your words stopped him. He closed his eyes for a moment, the weight of everything hanging in the air between you.
"So you knew..." he murmured, his voice cracking just slightly.
"Hyunjin texted. I saw it on your screen."
Changbin sighed and then looked around, seeing the decorations.
"What..."
"Since I ruined your proposal I thought I could fix it. As an apology."
The air between you thickened suddenly.
"I-I know it's not the best or the prettiest, but I thought—"
His voice faltered as he looked up at you, eyes filled with something unreadable. Shock, confusion… and then something softer, something heavier.
"What…what did you do?"
You froze. Your heart pounded.
He was staring at everything—the decorations, the candles, the careful details meant for him to present to you.
"I thought… I'd throw something together," you repeated, your voice small. "To fix your proposal."
"Fix it?"
And in that moment, you realized just how wrong that had sounded.
"N-No! I meant fix the night. Not your proposal—nothing was wrong, I just—I ruined the moment, and—"
You were scrambling, desperate to explain.
"Binnie, I—"
"I understand, Y/N."
His quiet chuckle sent a chill through you. It wasn't warm, wasn't teasing. It was sad.
"You made another opportunity," he said, his voice steady but distant. "You set up a proposal."
"Yes! An opportunity, not-" But then you saw it. The rapid blinking, the slight shift in his expression. The way he swallowed hard, as if forcing down words he wouldn't let himself say.
And suddenly, it clicked.
He wasn't upset about your wording. He wasn't even upset that you'd tried to make things right. He was upset because you'd taken this from him. Because he had wanted to be the one to do this for you.
When you had called him clingy earlier, you had let your stressors guide you to insult what you loved most about him.
How he wanted to do everything for you.
His love language towards you always tended to be acts of service.
And while a proposal wasn't necessarily though, it made sense that he wanted to do this for you. One of the biggest acts of your two lives.
He wanted to gift it to you, and you took it away.
For a long, suffocating moment, neither of you spoke.
Then, without another word, he stepped back. His hands curled into fists, then relaxed. He exhaled, gaze flickering between you and the scene you'd set. And then he turned.
You barely processed it as he walked past you, his presence fading with each step toward the door.
"Binnie, wait-"
But he didn't stop. The door opened, and before you could find the right words, the ones that wouldn't make everything worse—
It clicked shut.
——————————————————————————
Hyunjin
The moment Hyunjin you shut the door, you felt a wave of regret crash over you. You stewed in your regret for a while before you succumbed to it.
You couldn't stand it.
You rushed out the door, hoping to catch up; even if it had already a bit since his departure. But you knew him, and he probably hadn't made it far, taking his long legs for granted and dragging out his journey.
You wanted to stop him, to explain, to make him see what you couldn't say- but your pride had already built a wall too high. The words you had snapped at him stung, but there was a fear settling deep within you, too. Fear of rejection, fear of the misunderstanding spiraling out of control.
Fear of losing him from a quick yet grave mistake.
The street was quiet, and your footsteps echoed in the empty space. You turned the corner, but in your rush, you hadn't paid attention to where you were going.
It seemed you had taken one wrong turn after another, and suddenly the comforting glow of the familiar streetlights was replaced with unfamiliar darkness.
Panic rose in your chest. Your phone buzzed in your pocket, and you fumbled to pull it out, only for it to die before you could see.
You cursed under your breath. Of course, it died. Why wouldn't it? Your mind was foggy, and you could barely focus on anything, let alone figure out where you were. The tightness in your chest felt suffocating, but you pushed through it.
You wandered a little until you found a cute little convenience store, stepping inside, letting the warmth encapsulate you. You decided to grab a snack while you charged your phone, the clerk so graciously allowing you to charge it behind the desk.
You figured while you ate you could figure out what to say to Hyunjin, to mend whatever crack you had caused.
--
Meanwhile, Hyunjin still felt the sting of your words settled deep in his chest. His jaw clenched as he shoved his hands into his pockets, walking briskly down the street.
It wasn’t fair. He had done nothing wrong, yet you had pushed him away like he was too much. Like his affection- his need to be close to you- was suffocating.
Me? Too much- HAH. As if.
You were just being bratty because you were in a bad mood...right?
I'm not actually too much am I?
And maybe it was dramatic, maybe it was childish, but he wanted you to chase after him. To call out his name, to grab his sleeve, to do something to prove you cared as much as he did.
But the street behind him remained quiet.
His throat tightened. His steps slowed.
You weren’t coming.
Hyunjin scoffed, shaking his head. Fine. If you weren’t going to run after him, then you could suffer.
He would make you grovel, make you look at him with those wide, guilty eyes and apologize.
Beg a little. Then - only then - he’d pull you into his arms, stroke your hair, kiss your forehead, and tell you it was okay.
Because at the end of the day, that’s all he wanted.
To make things okay again.
With a sigh, he turned back around, heading toward your apartment, already playing out how he’d drag this out just enough to make you squirm before giving in.
But when he got to your door, his smirk faltered.
The lights were off, but the door was cracked.
His brows knitted together as he stepped into a completely empty home.
You were supposed to be here. You were supposed to be sitting inside, stewing in guilt, waiting for him to come back so you could apologize properly.
His fingers twitched as he opened your bedroom door. He went to the bathroom and knocked.
No answer.
He knocked, a little harder this time.
Still nothing.
A flicker of unease crept up his spine. He pulled out his phone and called. It rang twice before going straight to voicemail.
Hyunjin swallowed. His throat was dry.
His mind raced through every possibility. Maybe you just went out for air. Maybe you ran to the convenience store. Maybe-
But his gut told him otherwise.
His gut told him something was wrong.
His fingers curled around his phone, knuckles white as he sucked in a sharp breath. His frustration, his plan to make you beg, his need to be dramatic- all of it evaporated, replaced by one single, overwhelming thought.
He needed to find you.
Now.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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igorluvr · 2 days ago
Text
'MAY YOU NEVER FORGET ME
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PAIRING: choi su-bong (thanos) x fem!reader
SYNOPSIS: depression had always been a huge issue for you, covering it up with empty joy. so what would happen if you found someone just like you, who was willing to change for your sake?
WARNINGS: heavy angst, mature themes, mental health issues, implied self harm, depression, panic attacks, insecurities, guns, negative self talk, suicidal thoughts/actions!!!!!!, main character death
AUTHORS NOTE: spoiled y’all with tm fluff, gotta remind u shit ain’t sweet round here.
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words: [25k]
YOU were never truly "okay". Even though you always claimed to be, faking a smile when on the inside your whole world felt like it was collapsing. The last thing you wanted was for people to worry about you. Because if they did, they might discover the tangled mess of emotions you kept hidden away. Instead, you committed to putting on a face of bravery, drowning your pain in corny jokes and soulless smiles. While your heart still ached with that same emptiness you'd been feeling for years on end, doing this was easier than trying to explain the darkness that lurked beneath your surface.
You dreaded that one day, your facade would crack and everything would come tumbling down, revealing the emotions you tried so hard to protect everyone from. So, you continued to mask your emotions and if you let your act slip, you’d brush it off and tell them you were just tired. Every lie felt like it was putting more weight on your shoulders, but it was weight you were used to carrying.
Deep down you longed for someone to notice that you weren’t okay, to see beyond the smile and recognize the pain. But you knew that you made it almost impossible for someone to notice that anything was wrong.
Or so you thought, until you stumbled across the explosive personality of a man by the name of Thanos. Honestly, you were jealous of how well he carried himself. He seemed to be one of the only people here that was carefree, even if he is pumped with drugs. Looking at him in awe, you wondered how he did it, staying okay in a place like this.
Even though your mind was hyper focused on the eccentric man, you were completely unaware of how you stood out to him almost immediately. It wasn’t because you were annoying and obnoxious like everyone else here, it was because you two were the same.
You had some major personality differences, as you were more on the quiet and bubbly side. But Thanos used to be just like you. So the smile fading when all eyes were off of you, random mood swings, nonstop jokes, constantly tugging your sleeves down the second they rolled up, tears swelling in your eyes when nobody was around. He noticed.
He never got better, though. Just found ways of dealing with it. Using drugs and music as outlets of his depression. Thanos could tell you didn’t have anything like that, just letting all the pain seep in and build up inside of you. He wanted to help you before it got too much, how it almost did for him.
As he approached you, a confused look formed on your face. You’d never said anything to him or saw him look your way, so why was he suddenly trying to talk to you?
“What’s got you in here, babydoll?” he pondered “you look too sweet to be in any debt.”
At first, the sudden interest in your background confused you. You stared blankly for a couple seconds before remembering that you knew nobody else here, so what was the harm in opening up to this complete stranger?
“Student loan debt. Guess that’s what I get for going to an ivy league with barely any money” You laugh. Even though this was sort of a sensitive topic for you, having got into your dream school still having things going wrong, you tried to laugh about it.
Thanos could tell though. He saw the way your smile faltered a bit, how you lost the shine in your eyes. “I like you, stay close to me okay?” He said, eyes focused on you with nothing but pure intentions.
Why did he choose you of all people? There wasn’t anything interesting about your appearance, or how you acted. In that moment, as Thanos leaned back against the wall and settled in beside you, something shifted inside of you.
It was like the burden that weighed you down for so long was briefly lifted to reveal a sliver of vulnerability you kept buried for years. Maybe this strange man, with his wild presence, could see something you had long hid within yourself; a yearning for connection, a wish for someone to see and understand your struggles.
Thanos had broken through the toughness of your spirit, offering warmth and an unexpected sense of safety. Yet, the fear of being vulnerable with anyone haunted over you like a storm cloud, ready to unleash the emotions and secrets you had kept buried.
“Okay then,” Thanos said, breaking the heavy silence, “What’s the full story? It can’t just be student loans and bad choices. You look like you're carrying a world on those shoulders. But hey, I’m no therapist, just an expert in not fitting in.” His laughter was contagious and the sincerity of his tone made you wonder about the details of his own struggles.
Still, despite how much you wanted to reach out, start crying and finally release the burden you'd been carrying so long, you clung to the familiar comfort of masking how you felt, shooting him a quick smile that fell just short of genuine. It was easier to laugh it off than to reveal the chaos waiting inside.
But Thanos wasn’t easily fooled. He leaned in closer, his eyes sparkling with curiosity and sympathy. “You know, I used to think if i pushed everything down and ignored it, nobody else would notice my problems, too.” he said with a hint of vulnerability, “So I can see right through your little act sweetheart.”
You wanted to roll your eyes at the nickname but found the corner of your mouth lifting in a slight smile. Maybe it was the way his sincerity cut through your heart, or how his presence somehow felt comforting, like a thick warm blanket swallowing your body on a chilly day.
Thanos noticed your slight grin and raised an eyebrow, his own growing wider. “See? That’s the smile I like to see, we’re making progress here.” He nudged your shoulder lightly with his large ringed hand. “Come on I won’t bite, open up a little bit. Tell me about yourself like... what do like doing in your free time?”
You chuckled softly, caught off guard by his eagerness. “Um… I guess I like listening to music?” Music was one of the ways you ignored everything. As soon as you put your headphones in, it seemed like the world turned to a blur and your thoughts finally silence.
Thanos nodded, leaning back slightly, as if giving you the space to breathe yet still holding you in his gaze. “Music, huh? I get you. There’s something powerful about it. Like… a way we can hear what our voices can’t always express” he observed, seeming more immersed.
You could feel the walls you had carefully built around your emotions start to break, the cracks appearing as you considered sharing more. “Yeah, it’s like an escape” you admitted, voice softening “When everything else gets too loud, it’s the only thing that makes sense.”
He smiled gently, and you could tell he understood the depth of your words. “I get that,” he spoke gently, “It feels good to be able to… find the rhythm in chaos.” His eyes glazed over for a split second, lost in thought, before focusing back on you. “I used to write. Rhymes and lyrics, they were a way to process everything. Like my own therapy session, but with a beat.”
The way he spoke so passionately about making rhymes piqued your curiosity. You didn't take him as the creative type, definitely not poems or lyrics, but there was something about the way he mentioned it that made you want to know more. “You wrote music?” you asked, your tone neutral, but your interest piqued.
Thanos chuckled, low, and rumbling. “Still do, from time to time. Used to be big doing it but that got cut off pretty fast. Tried to let it go but… it's a part of me.” He leaned forward, his eyes taking on an intense glare. “There's something about putting words to a beat that just clicks. Like everything finally makes sense, y'know?”
You found yourself drawn into his passion, the way he spoke about music, it was infectious. And before you knew it, you were smiling again. Feeling a sense of connection with this stranger that you couldn't quite put your finger on.
You leaned in, curiosity taking control of you. “What do you mean it got cut off?” you asked, voice barely above a whisper. There was something about how his voice sounded when he said it, as if it were hit with an ache of longing and nostalgia, that made you want to know more.
Thanos’ gaze drifted off, his eyes clouding over like he was remembering something stowed deep into his mind. “I was in a competition, a rap contest” he began, his voice low and cautious. “I made it to the finale, but I fucked up. Forgot my lyrics on live TV.” He chuckled, a dry, humorless sound that sent a wave of sympathy through you. “It was a pretty public embarrassment. After that, I just… lost my drive, I guess. Didn’t feel like I could face the music scene again.”
You tilt your head, your eyes brimming with compassion as imagine how bad Thanos must've felt. “I get why you’d feel that way,” you said gently, trying to offer some advice, “But if music clearly still means a lot to you, why did you stop doing it completely?” you asked with your eyes locked on his, searching for answers in his gaze.
Thanos’ gaze snapped back to yours, like a fire igniting within them. “It’s hard to explain,” he said with a hint of roughness in his voice, “When you're up on that stage, with all those people watching you, and you mess up… it feels like you’re failing in front of the whole world. And for me, it wasn’t just about the music. It was about the persona, the image. When I messed up, it felt like I was losing myself too.” He paused, taking a breath to calm his nerves down. “But even after all this time, I still find myself writing. Like my brain's hardwired to respond to music.”
You felt a connection deepening between you, an understanding that passed the surface-level. “So, do you think you’ll ever perform again?”
Thanos hesitated, his eyes washing over with uncertainty. “I don’t know,” he admitted, his voice defeated. “Part of me misses it. The thrill of the stage, the energy of the crowd, it was amazing. But I'm also just scared. That failure keeps haunting over me, I don't wanna feel like that again.”
His honesty struck a chord within you. You could see the struggle all on his face, and it made you wish you could help him find that spark again. “It sounds like you're still searching for closure. Maybe you need to reconnect with it,” you suggested tentatively, hoping to encourage him. “Music doesn’t have to be about the fame or the competition. It can just be… for you.”
His eyes twinkled with hope, looking up at you with admiration. "Thank you, seriously," he spoke up, "Never had anyone look out for me like that." Suddenly he grabbed your hand and pulled you closer, his grip warm and reassuring.
From that moment on, you knew you'd made a friend for life. You went everywhere together, always grouping up during games and making sure each other were safe. The two of you were truly inseparable. That was, until the morning of the final game.
There were only 40 contestants left. Having lost many people close to you, shivers ran down your spine as you thought what the last mission would be. Almost every night, you had panic attacks and could barely sleep. After the 2nd game, you and Thanos moved your beds by each other in hopes of it helping the both of you calm down. Tonight, was one of the worst nights for you.
You laid in the dim scenery of the sleeping quarters, blue and red lights bouncing off of the bed frames. Your heart pounded like a drum with each beat echoing your unspoken fears. The weight of uncertainty felt as if it were crushing you, a terrible foreshadowing of the next game looming over your head.
Shadows deepened around you, contorting into horrifying shapes that mirrored the anxieties pounding at your mind. Your breaths came in quick gasps, each one capturing less air than the last. The suffocating fear of what was to come spun out of control.
You tried all the methods that helped in the past, but you couldn't focus on anything. Sweat drenched your body as the oxygen in the room seemed as it were running away from you. In your mind, all you could see were those bodies. All the blood and screams. Only one thought could form in your mind 'what if that were me?'
Beside you, Thanos stirred around, feeling the tension radiating from your body. He turned to face you, eyes flickering open, immediately aware that something was wrong. “Hey,” he murmured softly yet urgently, “what’s going on?”
You had felt the tears prick at the corners of your eyes as you whispered, “I can’t… I can’t do this. I’m so scared, Thanos. What if something happens? What if I—what if you.. die?” The words stuttered out in a rush, drenched with panic, the thought of losing him cutting through your heart like a knife.
Thanos’ expression shifted from sleepy to one of deep concern as he moved closer, his presence a calming force against the storm inside you. He gently took your hands inside his, relaxed and cautiously, and held them tightly. “Listen to me,” he said, voice low and soothing, “You’re not alone in this. I promise I’m going to do everything I can to keep us safe, both of us.”
Your breath hitched, but his gaze stayed on yours. “Remember what we talked about? We’ve been through so much together already. We can get through this too. No game is going to take me from you, not now, not ever.”
His words had felt like a lifeline, restoring you back to the world as you clung to them. You searched his eyes, your heart aching at the truth of what was unspoken between you. “But w-what if I lose you?” you choked out, vulnerable and exposed.
“I’ll fight like hell to make sure that doesn’t happen” he replied, “We’re in this together. I’m not just fighting for myself, I’m fighting for you, for us.” He leaned in closer, his forehead resting gently against yours. “I won’t let anything break us apart. I… I love you.”
His words floated in the air, a fragile yet meaningful phrase that cut through the thick tension of the moment. Your heart stuttered in your chest, caught off guard by the intensity and sincerity in Thanos’ voice.
You swore off of telling anybody that for a long time. But still, you couldn't help but feel the warmth radiating between you, a spark of connection glowing in the darkness. A wave of emotions crashed over you, joy and confusion mixing in a twister of emotions.
For a split second, all of your worries vanished. What laid ahead, the uncertainty of the games, the horrifying fear of loss. All of it faded away with just his 3 words. You swallowed hard, the weight of your anxiety lifting just enough to let something else in; love.
“Thanos…” you said softly, voice trembling as you searched his gaze. The reality of what he said sank in, wrapping around your heart like a warm embrace. You took a breath, steadying your breath, and met his unwavering expression with your own. “I love you too,” you whispered, the words flowing from your heart as if they had always been there, waiting for the right moment to break free.
As soon as you had said it, a wave of relief washed over you. You could see the way his eyes lit up, reflecting authenticity and openness. In that moment, as he pulled you closer, the world outside felt a little less overwhelming. “Us against the world” he muttered into your neck, sealing the bond between you two.
In the safety of his embrace, you lifted your face, letting your forehead rest against his as the tension began to disperse. “No matter what happens, I'm gonna fight for us” you said, your voice steadier now, strengthened by the love that filled the space between you.
His smile widened, showing the strength of his determination in his eyes. “You’re my everything. I won’t let these stupid games take that away from us” he reassured, brushing his thumb along your cheek.
As you sat there, taking in his presence, you felt like it was the perfect time to ask him something that had been on your mind the last week or so. "Thanos," you spoke up, causing his eyes to meet yours again, "what made you come up to me that day?"
His gaze softened a bit, looking down as to avoid eye contact with you. "Well, to be honest, I'm just like you." He admitted. Your eyebrows furrowed, confused as to what he was referring to.
"Y'know, I noticed it as soon as I saw you. I could tell you weren't okay up there, and this place isn't somewhere to be in that state" Oh. You thought you did a good job at hiding it, were you really letting your mask slip that much?
As soon as your mind started racing, Thanos placed his hands on your shoulders. "Hey, its okay. You didn't make it obvious or nothin'. I just didn't want you to get in a bad headspace and not give it your all. I could tell you're strong." He said, eyes flicking down to your wrists.
Quickly, you jerk your arms back. Shit, did they show? You looked back up at Thanos with tears in your eyes, terrified of what he'd think of you now that he saw who you really are. Weak and pathetic
"No no, Its okay. They're beautiful. Shows that you never give up, no matter what." Thanos comforted, face turning pale near the last part. "I'm jealous."
The tears started falling as you took in his words of validation. After years of trying to hide the scars, you finally felt like they were a declaration of your strength rather than a source of shame.
"I've never told anyone this, but now seems like the right time, yea?" He started, causing you to put your full attention on him "You saw my video, right? Of me playing ddakji?"
You chuckled for a bit, "Yea, it was pretty hard to miss"
"Right," he laughed, with a hint of pain. "Before that recruiter found me, I was on a bridge. I felt like I was at the end of my story, ready to let go. Nothing mattered anymore. I lost everything that made me happy. My job, my money, my sense of purpose. I thought I had tried everything else, and there was no other way out."
He took a deep breath, his gaze drifting out toward the blank room. “But then he came out of nowhere, with that stupid fancy suit. He asked if i wanted to play ddakji. Said if I won, he'd give me 100,000 won. It wasn't a lot but its better than nothing right?"
His eyes met yours, a flicker of resistance igniting within them. “I thought, what’s the worst that could happen? If I lost, I’d still be back where I started. But if I won… maybe there was hope after all.”
He ran a hand through his wild purple hair, a mix of relief and regret washing over him. “I never thought calling that number would lead me here, to this moment. It’s crazy how a simple choice can change everything. Y'know, it’s in our darkest moments that we find the light. I’m still scared, but I’m fighting now. For myself, and for those who can’t fight anymore.”
"But I saw you still had that fight in you, you just needed a push. And I wanted to be that for you" Thanos sighed.
Even more tears ran down your face but this time, the same went for him. You never thought that someone would actually take this much effort, especially in a situation like this, to look out for you. You didn't think you mattered that much to anyone.
The two of you laid down in your now shared bed, holding each other tight as to not lose one another, and slowly drifted into sleep.
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ ✦ ‧₊˚ ⋅
As the lights slammed on and intercom went off, you felt a familiar void in your stomach. As if on cue, Thanos rubbed your hand gently, bringing you immediate comfort. "Im right here, baby. N' Im not goin anywhere." A slight warmth rushed to your face as his words replayed in your head, maybe everything was gonna be okay after all.
You waited for what seemed like hours for them to bring food out, but it never came. It seemed as if you were getting less and less food as time went on. Was this on purpose to make everyone weaker? You didn't know, but it was definitely taking a toll on you.
Both of you stayed within an arms length of eachother the whole time. Even until they announced everyone to line up to enter the final game.
Thanos walked directly infront of you, holding your hand as you made your way through the stairs splattered with an arrangement of colors. The first time you walked though them, it seemed so colorful and full of life. Now, it just seemed dull.
As you walked into the near pitch-black room with red led lights tracing the walls, you felt your heart drop. Something wasn't right. Your stomach turned in a terrifying way as you held onto Thanos, scared of what's to come.
He's learned your behavior and what your actions mean, causing him to pull you closer. Thanos was aware of how easy you get anxious, and how bad it can get. And he felt as if was his job to protect you from all your worries.
Unbeknownst to you, though, Thanos felt the exact same way. He didn't know exactly what it was, but something about this particular game felt uneasy. In an attempt to stay strong for you, he cleared his throat and spoke up.
"Don't let go of me okay? Its dark as shit in here I can barely see" He laughed, trying his best to ignore the uncomfortable feeling in his stomach. Your palms got sweatier by the second as the both of you walked deeper into the room, occasionally bumping into people. Eventually, you heard the instructions come on the speaker.
"Please, split into 4 equal groups based off of your previous votes. Two "X" groups of 10, Two "O" groups of 10. You have 5 minutes" Immediately after, the red lights started blaring, just how they did during the mingle game. Your heart stopped as you heard that. Thanos hadn't gotten a chance to change his vote, were the two of you going to be separated during the final game?
“No!” you cried out, the word bursting from your lips like a desperate plea, hoping something, anything will change. “Thanos, we can't—”
“I know,” he interrupted, his eyes wide with fear, reflecting the same mix of urgency and determination as your own. “We got to find our groups before it’s too late.”
Why? Why was this happening now? Your mind raced as panic set in. The room felt stifling, the air thick with dread and uncertainty. You could feel the tension radiating off the players around you, their whispers and shuffling feet blending into a chaotic symphony of anxiety.
The chilling announcement echoed in your ears “4 minutes remain”
You could feel the pull of the frenzied crowd, the inevitable separation haunting you like a distant nightmare. You pushed through the horde, each step heavier than the last, your heart racing as you caught a glimpse of something, a cluster of players forming with that familiar 'X' patch on their chests.
“Thanos, look!” you shouted, your eyes locking onto the group that was gathered before you. “That’s my group!”
“Go, I’ll find mines.” Thanos urged, his grip on your hand loosening even though his eyes fought against losing you. “Just remember what we talked about. Keep pushing even if it seems impossible. Ill be waiting for you when we get out.”
Tears prickled at the corners of your eyes, but you began to pull away from him. “I can’t believe this is happening...” you whispered to yourself as the despair finally settled in.
With a final hug, his warmth wrapping around you like a comforting blanket, your hands slipped apart. The distance between you suddenly felt colossal, the amount of space between the both of you increasing with each passing player. Thanos was officially lost to the shadows.
Your heart pounded alarmingly in your chest as you joined the half of your “X” group, forcing yourself to focus despite the panic. You scanned the players, assessing the strength of the new faces around you. Were they reliable? Would they betray you?
A few familiar players joined the formation alongside you, Dae-ho and Jun-hee murmuring quiet reassurances to one another. “We can do this,” The taller man said, eyes darting around the group as the tension thickened.
But as more players continued to merge into smaller clusters, the reality set in, you had to push forward alone, even if your lover felt impossibly distant.
Just as you were being further swept into a crowd of new allies, the loudspeaker croaked out another instruction yet again. “Participants, please stick closely with your chosen group. As you do this, make your way towards the door ahead.”
You took a deep breath, shaky with uncertainty. The door ahead shone like a gateway to the unknown. The murmurs of strategizing and encouragement filled the air, a strange mix of comfort and anxiety filled your body as you tried to tune out everything around you.
Dae-ho nudged you gently, his voice steadying. “Stay focused. We’ll work together and beat this, okay?”
You nodded, trying to quell the rising tide of anxiety overwhelming you. “Yeah” You muttered, hearing your heartbeat in your ears, a persistent reminder of the stakes. As each group stepped closer to the door, the pink soldier with a bold circle on it's mask stopped everyone.
"Which group will be going first?" The soldier spoke, in a slightly distorted voice.
After a couple seconds of quiet mutters between every team, the leader of the other X group, the man from the previous games, spoke up.
"We'll go. This might be similar to a game I've done" He announced. Your group swiftly moved out of the way to allow his team to go. One by one, they walked through the door. As soon as the final member made their way through, the mechanical door forced shut, cutting off any view of the inside.
Waiting felt like an eternity. The tension in the air grew thicker as each team member shifted nervously. You could sense the anxiety growing in them. Whispers arose among your group, forming predictions on what may be beyond that door, but none could compare to the despair of reality.
About 10 minutes after the first group entered, they began calling for the next one. As your team was next in line, the guard signaled you all to go inside the door. Your heart dropped as you gave Thanos a final look back, tears in your eyes as you dread what's to come.
The scene infront of you was immersive. The room was bright, like a carnival. There were big glowing lights everywhere. As you stepped through the door, a chilling rush of air slapped against your face, carrying with it an overwhelming sense of dread. Before you knew it, the line of people suddenly stopped, causing you to faceplant into the person before you.
"Wait!" Someone yelled, "We're on a platform.."
As you peaked around the group, you saw how high up you were. There were horizontal poles coming from the ceiling, resembling something that you knew all too well.
"Welcome players. Allow me to introduce you to the sixth and final game: Monkey Bars. The rules are simple. Every member of your team must traverse a series of monkey bars before the timer hits zero. But beware, missing a bar and falling will result in immediate elimination."
As murmurs of fear rippled through the group, you took a deep breath to steady yourself. Even though Thanos had been drawn away, you couldn’t afford to lose. You needed to use all of your strength to complete this game while holding onto hope that you would see him again.
But deep in your gut, you feared that fate had other plans.
You glanced down, your heart racing as you tried to make sense of the distance to the ground. It felt like a dizzying drop, one wrong move could mean the end of everything you fought so hard for. Your teammates exchanged worried glances, each of them struggling with their own fears and doubts.
You could hear the faint beeping in the background, the sound growing louder with each passing second. The adrenaline rushed through your veins as you clenched your fists, surveying the area once more so you fully understand what you're getting yourself into.
As the countdown hit zero, the timer's blaring sound echoed through the venue like a gunshot, triggering a surge of chaos. One by one, players launched themselves onto the first bar, swinging forward with determination. They attempted to coordinate their movements, using a tactic similar to the one in the 6-legged race.
With the rhythm of jumping every two counts guiding them, you carefully watched as some moved gracefully while others struggled and faltered, their cries of panic bouncing off the walls. The sight of watching your peers slowly fall to their death put a sick feeling in your stomach, the mushy 'splat!' as they hit the floor making you want to throw up.
Before you knew it, it was your turn. The immense pit of fear in your stomach twisted tighter as you leapt forward, grasping the first bar with both hands. The initial swing was thrilling yet terrifying, anxiety clawing at you with the fear of falling. You forced yourself to stay focused. Inch by inch, you moved, feeling the strain in your muscles as you reached for the next bar.
“Come on, keep going!” someone shouted from behind you, their encouragement pushing you forward. Each bar you grabbed felt like a small victory, but you knew you still had much more to go, taking tiny glimpses at the amount of bars left. You could hear gasps from teammates behind you after slipping off a bar, causing them to fall and add to the pile of gruesome bodies gathering below you.
Seeing all those bodies at the bottom caused your overthinking to kick in at the absolute wrong time. What if you fell? What if you died? Desperation clawed at you as you reached the halfway point. The metal bars were slick with sweat and your palms felt numb, grip faltering. But the thought of Thanos pushed you onward, a reminder of everything you had to lose—and everything you were fighting for.
From then on, with every swing, hope swelled within you. This could be the moment that changed everything. That fleeting memory of Thanos pushed you further than you ever thought. You remembered his words "Keep pushing even if it seems impossible." and it fueled you like never before. Your heart raced, a mix of determination and dread flooding through you.
Taking a deep breath, you used every ounce of determination in you and pushed forward once more. With one final pull, you swung to the last bar, the end platform finally coming into view.
As you landed safely, a rush of euphoria washed over you. You’d made it! The cheers from your team resonated around you, but there was no time for celebration just yet. You turned back to the others, knowing that many were still grappling with their own struggles.
“Keep going!” you shouted, your voice hoarse but filled with fervor. “You can do this!”
With your encouragement, you watched as your teammates found the strength to push themselves forward, unified in the fight for survival in this relentless game. Hope flickered within you, a feeling you wished would carry all of you to victory.
As your team finished the challenge, you felt your nerves calm down. There were some that didn't make it, but the majority did and you were happy for that. The timer still had a minute and 20 seconds left, everyone spent their time talking and calming down. One thing that confused you, though, was that the other half of the 'X' group was still there from when they finished. If they completed the game, shouldn't they be able to go back to their own room?
Just as the thought started to worry you, the buzzer rang through the room, signaling that your remaining time was now up. You expected to be taken to the sleeping quarters, but there were no guards, not even a door on the side you stood on.
The first half of the 'O' group walked through the entrance, and your heart exploded as you saw a face you grew to love. It was Thanos. You could see a familiar intensity etched across his brow. He was in his element, ready to confront the challenge ahead.
The second you locked eyes, his face glowed in admiration. Time seemed to freeze as the noise around you faded, leaving only the two of you in that moment.
Your exchanged gazes were cut off by the blaring buzzer, signaling the start of his team’s round. He straightened his posture, expression changing swiftly from admiration to fierce determination. With a quick glance back at you, he locked eyes one last time. A silent promise passed between you, he would give his absolute all.
Soon enough, the familiar purple head of hair caught your attention. He was about to start. It felt like you were the one on the bars as you watched him make his way across. As he took a deep breath and launched himself into the challenge, it was like the ground beneath you shifted. You were completely focused, holding your breath with each swing he took.
Every struggle and grunt made you flinch. Watching the players make their way across the stage, you tried to distract yourself from the fact that your boyfriend was right behind them, fighting for his life.
Even though he seemed to be making it across fairly okay your heart still beat profusely. At some point, you decide to turn away altogether, saving yourself from the pain of watching. While you sat there with your eyes glued closed, trying to shield yourself from the people before you, you feel a tap on your shoulder.
Slowly, you pull your head up, not wanting to face reality. But the person you were stressing so much over was standing right infront of you. Thanos stood there, a mix of adoration and relief flooding his face.
His chest rose and fell rapidly, proving how much the previous game had tired him. You could see faint layer of sweat glistening against the harsh lights above, but none of that really mattered. What mattered was the warmth in his eyes as he leaned in closer, hugging you tightly as to calm himself down.
“You okay?” His voice was soft yet urgent, a contrast to the loudness of the everything around you. With this, you nodded, swallowing the lump in your throat. “I was watching, It was..”
“I know,” he interrupted gently, a soft smile creeping onto his lips. “But I’m here now.”
Your heart swelled, despite the noise and yells from the crowds around you. It was such a relief to see him unharmed, standing tall and ready for anything. The moment slowed as you both just stared at each other, words slipping away.
Unfortunately, your moment got cut off, like always, by the instrusive 10 minute timer going off. While the next group made their way in, the two of you just laid there, taking in each others presence before the games ended, for good.
It felt like you were floating, like nothing around you mattered and the two of you were the only people on earth. As you drifted deeper into this peaceful haven you knew that nothing could ever break the bond that you shared with Thanos, a bond that was forged in tough times and deep emotions.
But as they say, there's always a calm before the storm.
The final team completed the challenge before you knew it, and the whole room erupted with cheers. We were finally able to go home. This whole time, all the tears and fighting was worth it. Thanos kissed you passionately as to celebrate the win, or what seemed like a win.
All of the applause were cut short by that nerve-wracking intercom coming back on. "Dear contestants, congratulations on completing the first part of the game! 24 players now remain."
Your heart stopped as you heard those words. First part..? Didn't we finish the games? You looked up at Thanos in disbelief, hoping to get some type of comfort. Instead, you were met with a face of pure terror.
All the color was drained from his cheeks as his mouth hung open out of shock, he looked like he'd just seen a ghost. Panic surged through you, overpowering the joy of victory. You exchanged glances with the others in the room, confusion and dread painting their faces, mirroring your own fears.
The intercom continued, its voice cold and mechanical. “The rules for Phase 2 are the same as Phase 1: There is a time limit of 25 minutes for all remaining players to return to the opposite side of the room. Please proceed with caution.”
25 minutes? That isn't nearly enough time to get everyone across. Your uneasiness grew as players started to shuffle around in worry, adding onto your anxiety of already being high up. The timer blared through the room, signaling the start of phase 2.
Player 456 took initiative and stepped infront of everyone, coming up with a plan. "Everyone, follow my lead. A person will join in every 3 bars, be careful and don't panic. It will slow you down and cause everyone to mess up."
Soon after his speech, he took a leap onto the bar, causing the countdown to begin. Everyone followed his orders, joining in every 3 bars. It was all going smoothly up until it was nearing your turn.
You watched as the team excelled, most pushing though the dismay and making it to the end. Others weren't as lucky, losing their grip and falling to their deaths.
Thanos insisted on going after you, claiming it would help him stay focused and remember what he’s fighting for. You agreed quickly, finding his words endearing, completely oblivious to the true reason for his actions.
Unbeknownst to you, Thanos had gotten an arm injury in one of the previous games, which progressively worsened. He didn’t tell you because he didn’t want you to worry any more, but he could feel himself losing strength. Especially with this final game being physical, Thanos knew this was his last chance to be with you.
Instead of telling you his true feelings, that he was sure this would be his last time seeing you, he decided to protect your heart for now. After all, isn’t that what he approached you to do?
As the person before you made their way onto the bars, Thanos pulled you in for a tight, unknowingly final hug. You weren’t sure why he did this, or why it felt so much more different, but you appreciated it.
“Please, try your hardest okay? Don’t give up no matter what.” He muttered, face stuffed in the crook of your neck. Before waiting for a response, he gently grasped your face with both hands and pressed his lips against yours in a long, passionate kiss that left you breathless.
His mouth moved with a desperate urgency, as if savoring every second you had left together. The kiss was like a goodbye, a promise of forever that lingered even as it came to an end.
You jumped on the bar, full of life. All your strength kicked in at this moment as you used Thanos’ words to power you through. The muscles in your arms burned as you worked through the challenge, but his presence fueled your determination. You couldn’t let him down. Not now.
The crowd roared around you, their cheers blending into a rhythmic chant that kept pace with your heartbeat. Looking back at Thanos, you saw his face pale with anxiety. You wanted to assure him that everything would be alright, but you were too focused on pushing past your limits.
As the minutes ticked by and the final bar loomed ahead, you felt doubt creep in—what if you weren’t strong enough? What if all the fighting, all the trouble from the last games led to this moment and you were about to fail?
You took a final look back, wanting to see Thanos' face in hopes of it pushing you through the last half of the course, but instead get met with a face of sheer terror. Thanos' face was full of raw desperation, his eyes wide and glistening with an unsettling mix of fear and disbelief.
The usually relaxed lines of his jaw tightened, showing a weakness that sharply contrasted with his earlier mood. Unbeknownst to you, this was the moment he finally understood the weight of his looming defeat. He knew the end had come, but why did it have to be with you right in front of him?
Thanos' arms buckled as he attempted to push through, to use all his remaining energy to make it to the end. Each swing grew heavier as the bars beneath his hands grew slick with sweat. His heart raced, not just from the pressure but from the dread settling in his gut. A shadow of hopelessness flickered through his mind.
“This can’t be it,” he thought, clenching his jaw as he struggled to swing himself forward. Not like this. Not now. His gaze flickered to you, hanging off the bar 3 ahead of him, eyes wide with concern and shimmering with tears.
Memories of your laughter echoed through his mind, light and warm against the harsh reality of these games. He remembered those nights spent talking about dreams and futures, the plans you constructed together so effortlessly. All the times you had smiled at him, with that light in your eyes that made his heart swell, igniting a fire deep within him that he didn’t know he had left.
But now, did it even matter? The cruel thought twisted in his chest like a knife. He fought through so much, lost everything, only to get this close to the one thing he wanted most; true, undeniable love. And now it felt like sand slipping through his fingers, the more he struggled, the more he was losing.
As he swung on the next bar, his grip faltered for just a moment, and unlike every other time before, he felt fragility creep into his bones. The voice within him began to scream, demanding him to give up, that it was all over. Why keep fighting when the odds felt impossible?
But he had to move, for you. He gritted his teeth, forcing his body forward, fatigue clinging to him like a leech. With every swing, he felt a crack in his pride, a familiar emptiness growing in him as his thoughts flooded with anxieties.
He remembered the warmth of your hands in his, the gentle touch that made every battle feel worth it. Each moment spent with you had become a lifeline in this place, a source of hope he never thought he would have again.
As he took another swing, desperation fueled him, but quickly it faded. His muscles trembled, stabs of pain shooting through him. A vision of you, radiant and pure, tugged at his heart, and a sob caught in his throat. This was truly the end for him.
You tried not to turn back, hearing how much Thanos was struggling. You didn't want to see him like that. As the fight to the end continued you only had one thing on your mind; how happy the two of you would be after all this.
As you moved forward, a raspy voice came from behind you. "No…" Thanos murmured. Overcome by curiosity, you glanced back slightly. What you saw brought tears to your eyes.
You saw Thanos clutching the bar tightly with raw desperation, the last ounce of strength draining from him. He locked eyes with you, wanting nothing more but to keep going for you, his girl. But before he could think further, his body betrayed him. His fingertips slipped, a sudden loss of control, and time felt like it stretched endlessly.
Every memory, every smile, every hopeful dream flickered through your mind. The plans you had made, the laughter you shared, the quiet moments when everything else faded away and it was just the two of you.
But now, with horror pinching at your heart, you watched him fall. In that split second before he vanished from your sight, you saw the mix of fear and regret cross his face. It was a sight you would never forget, a moment where everything he had fought for clashed with the dreaded reality of loss.
As he disappeared from view, you felt your heart shatter into a thousand pieces. The warmth of your shared moments was replaced by an empty void, every hope for a future together gone in an instant. The world around you moved on, but you were frozen, trying to grasp the reality of what just happened.
You watched as Thanos, your first true love, fell to the ground becoming nothing more than another body added to the pile below. You faltered, unable to tear your gaze from the spot where he had been.
And in those final moments, as he hit the ground, with a pain that felt both devastating and liberating, he saw your face flash before him, etched forever in the depths of his heart. A love that would transcend even death. For a heartbeat more, he hoped that you would find your way through this cruel world, even if he could not be there to protect you.
A suffocating silence enveloped you, an immense contrast to the chaos that had erupted just moments before. The fight within you dispersed, replaced by a crushing sense of helplessness. Your only reason to keep going had just faded. You sloppily pushed your way to the end, fighting the urge to simply give up.
Finishing the challenge didn't excite you anymore. As you heard the announcement stating the end of the games, all you could think about was how you just lost the only person worth fighting for.
You could've did something, anything. Why him? Why couldn't it be you? The whole experience was bittersweet. As the screen displayed the amounts of money everyone would receive, there was no sense of happiness within you. Just a hole in your heart, one only Thanos could fill.
But now he's gone and you feel worse than ever. You didn't care about the money anymore. Sure, you were no longer in debt, but it wasn't worth losing your best friend. The money felt like an insult, a shallow victory overshadowed by the emptiness left in his death.
The days drag on. Every morning, you wake up hoping things will feel different, but the same sadness greets you like an unwanted shadow. You feel lost in a world that keeps moving forward while you’re frozen in the moment where you lost it all.
Eventually, the sadness becomes overwhelming, and you find yourself spiraling back into darker thoughts. Feelings of hopelessness creep in, and it’s hard to escape them. You start to think that maybe it would be easier if you just didn’t have to feel anything at all. That maybe not being here would take away the pain for good, and you catch yourself wondering if anyone would truly miss you.
Those thoughts frighten you, but they also exist in the quiet moments when everything else feels unbearable. In the times where there nothing to focus on but your thoughts and trauma, you wonder if it's worth it.
Nobody would care. Family hasn't called in months, friends cut you off. You were an embarrassment to be around. The thoughts kicked in harder, and you started to think of plans. Time, place, and opportunity; those were the 3 key things you needed to consider if you went trough with it.
But as you sit there, a small flicker of doubt creeps in. You remember how you used to laugh, how you once loved to share stories and connect with others. Remembering these times, your heart aches at how you took it for granted.
You would give anything to go back to those days. When you didn't have to worry about debt, being able to go out with friends everyday. Now the world seemed gray and lifeless. You felt like a ghost, simply floating through the stages of life, not truly taking in anything.
A week passes since you've been out the house, and you still haven't left your bed. The sheets cling to you like a magnet, but they suffocate you too. You haven’t showered in days, the thought of standing beneath the water feeling like an unruly task. Instead, you find comfort in the bundle of your blankets, where you can hide from the world and the relentless demands of life.
Your body feels sluggish as hunger pangs occasionally reminding you of your needs, but preparing food or even grabbing a snack seems overwhelming. It’s easier to ignore it, to push it aside and focus on trying to silence the chaos in your mind. You scroll endlessly through your phone, searching for distractions, but nothing holds your attention. You feel disconnected, like there's a glass wall between you and everything else.
Another week passes, the same exhausting loop continuing. Everything was genuinely draining, and you were tired of it. Breathing felt like a chore, and you could barely find the strength to get on your phone. So, you decided that it was time. Time for all your thoughts to silence and pain to finally stop.
You remembered the gun you kept in your bedside drawer, for "safety" reasons. It was never put to use, so maybe now was the time. Picking it up, you made sure it was fully loaded. You didn't want to regret this, not after everything that's happened.
Being your first time out the house in weeks, you drove to a faraway forest, making sure it was in a desolate place nobody would even think of visiting. The drive was about 2 hours long, causing it to be pitch black upon arrival. There hadn't been any cars for the past 45 minutes of driving, just how you wanted.
As you picked up your phone for the first time in almost a week, you noticed that there were hardly any notifications. It became clear that they really didn’t care. Looking up slightly, you noticed the time "11:38". Time, place, and opportunity.
All you could think about was Thanos. You'd promised him not to give up, but you had to. You thought back to his previous words, "it’s in our darkest moments that we find the light." Hearing his words repeat in your head made you realize, he was your light.
He'd came out of nowhere, sweet-talking you and washing all your worries away. For that week you'd known eachother, you were the happiest you'd been in a while. There wasn't a single time you considered doing something awful to yourself.
But now that he's gone, it seemed like you were in worse shape than before. You were bad, but not enough to be standing in the middle of the woods with nothing but your phone and a gun.
You shivered as the cool air from the wind hit your face. The dark, silent setting brought you uneasiness. You were finally alone. Raising the firearm to your head, your mind started racing. Was this really it? Is this how it ends?
The weight of the gun brought fatigue to your weak arm, being severely malnourished and exhausted. You felt horrible to break Thanos' promise, not being able to keep pushing anymore. The guilt hit you like a bus.
Suddenly, all your emotion intensified by a hundred. You felt a mix of anger and depression swirl though your body as you gripped the gun tighter. Every negative feeling abruptly switched onto you, leaving you with nothing but self-loathing.
Without thinking, you pulled the trigger. You felt a flash of agonizing pain as the thick bullet pierced through your skull. All of your pain was swiftly replaced with absolute serenity, as if the chaos of your life had finally unraveled.
As your awareness faded away, all you could think about was Thanos. How he held you when you started panicking, understood your body language, and connected with you like no one else did.
You'd reunite with him for good this time.
156 notes · View notes
chleem · 22 hours ago
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request idea? thinking about how Drew would drop everything for his girl ❤️‍🔥 like if she showed up at his house crying because she needs him (something with her parents or something? maybe they forgot something important to her)
and Drew is with his roommates or friends (who love the reader) but as soon as he sees his girl sad, he has a soft spot for her and for taking care of her 🫶🏼
⋆.˚ Warnings: none, pure fluff (still, read at own caution
ִ ࣪𖤐 a/n: enjoy! sry i haven't replied for so long, i was spending cny w/my family.
word count: 2.2k
──── 𝜗𝜚 ─────
The sound of the basketball game is practically vibrating through the walls—close to the end, with the score tied and everyone on edge. 
Drew’s lounging on the couch, leaning back, eyes glued to the screen. 
The room is full of his friends, all hyped up, throwing out their commentary and joking around. It’s guys’ night, and it’s a vibe they’re all soaking in.
Then the doorbell rings for the second time tonight, and Drew’s eyes flicker to the door.
"Did we order pizza? Again?" Drew asks. 
“Dunno, man, check,” his friend says, not looking up from the game, clearly too invested. 
Drew sighs, a little annoyed at the interruption, but his feet move automatically toward the door.
When Drew opens the door, he doesn’t see pizza. 
He sees you.
His expression shifts instantly—his confusion giving way to something deeper. 
Drew notices the smudge of mascara under your eyes first—the dark lines trailing down your cheeks. The rest of your makeup isn’t much better: foundation starting to fade where the tears have blurred it, the eyeliner long gone from where it used to frame your eyes.
His heart skips a beat. The noise from the game and his friends’ laughter suddenly feel miles away, as if the room has gone quiet in an instant.
Then, through your teary eyes and blushed cheeks, you give him a smile. It’s weak, almost forced, but you try. You shrug your shoulders, like you're attempting to downplay whatever’s hurting you.
“Hey, Joseph,” you say, your voice cracking just enough that Drew hears it. Your smile fades, and the act you’re trying to put on crumbles just a little.
Drew’s heart sinks. He knows you too well. The moment you said his name like that—broken and vulnerable—he realizes just how much you’re holding back.
Without a word, Drew steps closer.
The easy-going grin he had on earlier is gone. His brows furrowed with concern as he reaches for you, hands cupping your cheeks. 
He holds you gently, but firmly—like he's grounding you, keeping you steady.
His gaze softens, and he watches, helpless for a second, as the first tear escapes and trails down your cheek. His heart aches seeing you like this.
His eyes never leave yours, and there’s an unspoken promise in them—I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.
When you speak again, the apology slips out almost before you can stop it. “I’m sorry…” you start, feeling bad for interrupting his night with his friends.
“Don’t. Don’t apologize.” He says, as if he’s trying to erase that sense of guilt before it can settle in. 
He gives you a small, almost imperceptible shake of his head, “don’t ever apologize for needing me.”
He takes a moment, watching your eyes carefully, making sure you understand that he means it. There’s no disappointment in his gaze—only warmth, care, and an overwhelming need to protect you from whatever’s hurting.
Your eyes flicker away, sparkling with unshed tears as you struggle to catch your breath, trying to muffle the cries threatening to break free.
“It’s just- it’s just my parents-“
Your words falter as his friends cheer loudly in the background, their excitement rising with each point scored in the game. 
Drew notices immediately—your discomfort, the way you're struggling to open up in this moment—and it hits him: you’re still standing out in the hallway, exposed to everything.
“Let’s, let’s get inside,” he murmurs. He doesn’t need to say more than that—his hands move to your shoulders, guiding you toward his room, tell you everything.
His friends, too absorbed in the game, don’t notice the subtle shift in the air. They’re still yelling at the screen, completely oblivious to the fact that his girlfriend has showed up crying. 
As he leads you down the hall, you finally feel the air change—calmer, quieter. 
The second the door of Drew’s room closes behind you, the outside world fades.
Unknowingly, you’ve sat down at the edge of his bed, the soft mattress dipping under your weight. 
Drew quietly moves around his room, as he finds a box of tissues on his dresser. He doesn’t take his eyes off you, though—watching the way you sit, the way your shoulders shake with each breath, how your chest rises and falls, unevenly.
Once he hands it to you, Drew settles beside you. His arm slides around your shoulders, pulling you closer but not forcing you.
He listens carefully to the soft hiccups that escape from you, tiny gasps caught in the air. 
He just continues to rub gentle circles on your back, his touch light and comforting. 
Finally, Drew speaks, but it is barely above a whisper, “what’s wrong?”
You grab a tissue, dabbing your cheeks where the mascara has ran down. 
When you see the dark spots on the tissue, your chest tightens. The tears come faster now, and you let out a shaky breath between sobs, “now my makeup’s ruined!” 
Drew can’t help but chuckle lightly at your reaction, the sound soft and gentle. His hand, still resting around your shoulders, takes the tissue from your trembling fingers.
With a small, reassuring smile, he dabs at your cheeks, wiping away the smudged makeup with care. 
“Don’t, don’t worry about that,” he says quietly. 
The tenderness in his words feels like a balm to your frayed nerves, and for a moment, it’s the only thing grounding you.
As you look up at him, your breath catching in your throat, you notice how close he is. 
His face is inches from yours, and his eyes hold nothing but softness, nothing but a promise of comfort. His hand lingers at your cheek, his thumb brushing against your skin like it’s the most natural thing in the world.
“I…i had dinner with my parents,” you start. 
“I know,” he murmurs softly, his gaze never leaving yours. He'd seen the date marked on his calendar weeks ago, the reminder of your private dinner with your parents, and he had known it might be a tough night for you.
It was a dinner just for you and them—an attempt to reconnect, to have a moment where things might feel normal again. But Drew knew, from the way you’d talked about it in passing, that it wasn’t going to be easy.
“They still think, I made a huge mistake,” your voice cracks once again, and you swallow hard, as if trying to force the pain down, but it’s no use. It bubbles up too quickly.
Drew knows exactly what you mean. He remembers you telling him about dropping out in the middle of your final year. How it had been a decision made for yourself, even if your parents couldn’t understand it.
Drew watches you quietly for a moment, then speaks softly, “You did what was right for you. If they don’t get it, that’s on them, not you. Who cares what they think?”
He gives you a small, reassuring smile, before adding on, “you should see yourself through my eyes. You’re beautiful, smart, and more than enough as you are. You don't need a...certificate to prove that.”
His words settle over you, and for a moment, you feel your heart soften at the quiet sincerity in his voice. But you quickly look away, feeling a bit shy under his gaze. 
“Yeah, well…” you mutter, “we got into this huge fight, and I just stormed out- and look where I am. Ruining your - your guys’ night.”
“No, no,” Drew immediately interrupts, “you’re not ruining anything.”
Then, unexpectedly, without missing a beat, Drew throws the tissue in his hand toward the trash can in the far corner, and you watch, distracted by the sudden movement. 
You can’t help but let out a small chuckle when he makes a perfect shot, the tissue landing neatly inside with a satisfying swish.
Drew turns toward you, his smile both confused and amused, clearly unsure of what exactly made you laugh but happy to see you smile. “What?” he asks, his voice still holding that easy charm.
You stare at him for a moment, your eyes catching on his lips, the way they curve just slightly in that grin, and for a fleeting second, the urge to kiss him overwhelms you. 
It’s like everything else in the room fades away, and it’s just the two of you in this small, quiet moment.
Your breath catches in your chest, and before you can even think, the space between you seems to vanish.
Without a word, you lean in, your eyes fluttering shut, letting instinct take over. His hand gently cups your cheek, warm against your skin, as he tilts your head just slightly.
And then, you feel it—his lips against yours, and everything feels…right.
The kiss is calming, full of quiet affection—comforting in a way that eases all the tension, like a safe place where nothing else matters.
You could taste your own tears, salty on your lips, but somehow they only make the moment feel more real—more human. There’s something about the way Drew holds you, his lips soft and patient, as if he's absorbing all your hurt without needing to speak.
You pull away just briefly, catching your breath, but before you can even fully regain yourself, Drew leans in again, this time with urgency, as if he needs this kiss more than you.
His lips press against yours, deeper this time, gentle but insistent. His hand moves to your back, pulling you closer as if he’s anchoring himself to you, or to this moment.
You smile against his lips, hands wrapping around his neck. 
You want to push him against his bed, take him right there, show him how appreciative you are of him, but seems like, the rest of the world wants him too.  
The sound of his friends cheering from outside breaks through the moment, reminding you that Drew has guests over, and this isn't just your time with him.
You pull away, resting your forehead against his, closing your eyes for just a moment to catch your breath. 
When you reopen your eyes, you find Drew’s gaze already on you—soft, steady, and full of something unspoken. There’s a quiet intensity in the way he looks at you, like he’s taking in every detail, as if he’s memorizing this moment, just as you are.
“You have- you have people, in the other room,” to your own surprise, you’re stuttering. You pull your head away slightly, finding the fun in tracing the line of his jaw. 
“I wanna stay here,” he murmurs, his voice thick with something you can’t quite place, but you feel it in your chest, a quiet certainty. 
He doesn’t break his stare, and in that moment, it’s like he’s asking you to stay with him too—not just in this room, but in everything he’s feeling, everything you’re both sharing.
“Ask them to leave,” you whisper back, a small smile tugging at your lips, though the words are more playful than serious.
You both know it’s not that simple. 
“Join me,” he says, referring to his guys' night, to his friends in the living room. 
“Well, at least let me... change, and redo my makeup.”
“I don’t know…” he lets his words trail off, his eyes scanning your features with mischief lurking in them, “they might like- like having a panda around.”
You roll your eyes, but the corners of your mouth twitch, unable to hide the small smile. You hear Drew’s throaty laugh escape his lips, a sound that makes your heart skip.
“Alright, just… take your time,” he says, his playful tone softening as he presses a gentle kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering just a moment longer than expected, like he wants to make sure you feel it.
You watch him, your chest warming at the gesture, as he moves across the room to his dresser. 
He pulls it open, rummaging through his clothes, and then, almost casually, he grabs the hoodie you recognize to be 'yours'. It’s his, but with how often you wear it, it’s practically yours now. 
Then, in one smooth motion, he opens the top drawer and takes out your shorts, underwear, and bra. He places them beside you, not even needing to say anything—just a small, thoughtful gesture that tells you he knows exactly what you need, even before you ask for it.
You look up at him, surprised by the simplicity of it, but somehow it feels even more intimate than words could say. It’s the way he just gets you, without needing to make a big deal of it.
And because it felt right, you whisper, “I love you.”
Drew’s gaze softens, the teasing smile melting away into something more sincere. His eyes hold yours as he says, “I love you more,” his voice quiet but filled with warmth. 
There’s no playfulness now—just honesty, raw and real.
“…now get out of here,” you tease, the corners of your lips lifting into a smirk.
He leans forward, his finger lightly tapping your forehead in a playful push, “so eager to get rid of me?”
“Yes,” you whisper back, and he smiles, shaking his head. 
With one last glance, he turns and walks to the door.
And once the door closes behind him, you’re left with a warm feeling in your chest—safe, loved, and entirely at peace.
-------------------------------
happy cny! angpao for everyone <3
i apologize in advance if this isn't good and has mistakes- i wrote it in a rush! (also, i realized there was a sudden pov switch- tf
other
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sprites4ever · 22 hours ago
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And you never saw ancaps screaming 'statist' at the top our lungs while the fash call us weak degenerates who just want to do drugs?
Of course they do, but for different reasons. Anarchists are against statism because they think that authority = bad, that it was invented by the capitalists and that without it, everyone would be a perfectly responsible, self-sufficient Übermensch. Ancaps are against statism because governments generally dislike post-industrial slavery for profit (unless they're communist.)
I'm impressed with how you showcase that you know absolutely nothing about libertarianism, fascism, or imperialism all at once.
Enlighten me then, you who knows so much better than everyone else.
How is libertarianism not the political agenda of letting capitalism run free?
How is fascism not the political agenda of mythicized militarism?
How is imperialism not the political agenda of enforcing one's culture and history onto other people?
Let me guess, all of it is actually Left-wing (somehow)? I've talked to dumbasses on this website who legit tried to argue that fascism is Left-wing.
Like I said different flavors of socalism.
Turns out that you're the one who has no clue what socialism is. Apparently, you lack reading comprehension, too.
In case it wasn't clear yet,
Trump's science denialism is not because he actually believes it, but, like everything else, because it fills his wallet.
After spreading anti-vaxxer narratives throughout the COVID pandemic, he's now taken to giving big tech companies massive bonuses for the purpose of using AI to prototype experimental cancer vaccines.
He was quite simply against COVID vaccines because everybody needed them, so they had to be issued for free and he couldn't make a profit off of then.
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stollengoods · 1 day ago
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The Longer the Wait, The Sweeter the Kisses
Requested Nam-gyu Fluff~
Warnings: Cursing, slight smut but not much (they don’t go all the way), mentions of drug use, overdose, and recovery.
Summary: Your friend Mi-na is tired of you third wheeling her and Thanos so she has him set you up on a date with his friend Nam-gyu. Surprisingly you and Nam-gyu really hit it off. So much so you invite him to your place, but what happens when you guys start making out/touching each other and you inform him that you won’t go all the way ?
P.S. This one’s a bit long… I apologize I got carried away haha
————
Thanos and Mi-na were cuddling on the couch while you were sitting in the arm chair beside them. He booped her nose with a blue colored finger nail, “You’re so cute.”
She giggled touching her forehead to his, “You’re so handsome.”
“And I so want to kill myself right now.” You murmured, scrolling through your phone.
In the background you saw Mi-na’s head turn towards you. “I told you it was just gonna be Thanos and I this weekend. You’re the one who invited yourself, remember ?”
You scrolled mindlessly on Instagram, “Yeah, but I didn’t think you guys would be like this.”
“It’s called being in a relationship.” She remarked and you snorted, “Gosh, thats what I have to look forward to ?”
“I used to think that way too until I met my soul mate.” You heard their lips smacking and immediately felt sick.
“Ewww, if I ever get like that shoot me. Please.”
Thanos chuckled and your friend giggled rolling her eyes, “When are you going to get a boyfriend y/n ? You’re old enough to drink why don’t you go to the bar and find one, you’ll get one asap.”
“Yeah… there are several reasons why I would never do that, plus I think what you’re describing is a hook up not a boyfriend.”
She huffed, “Well maybe you need a hookup, you’re like always a negative nancy.”
You looked up from your phone and glared at her for a second before looking back at your screen.
“See ! That’s what I’m talking about.” Mi-na said.
“Oh !” She put a hand on her boyfriend’s shoulder, “Baby, why don’t you set her up with one of your friends ?”
You immediately clicked your phone screen off and shoved it in your pocket, “Fuck no.”
Thanos looked over at you confused and Mi-na furrowed her eyebrows at you and tilted her head towards Thanos basically telling you your being rude.
You awkwardly laughed, “I’m sorry, that came out wrong… it’s just I’ve seen Thanos’s instagram. All him and his friends do is drugs, drink, and party. That’s not my scene, I need someone more-“
You were about to say mature but bit your tongue, “-what’s the word I’m looking for… umm- mellow I guess ?”
Thanos nodded his head in understanding, “Everyone has there preferences.” He shrugged.
“What about Nam-gyu ?” Mi-na asked Thanos with a smile on her face, “Didn’t he just make 3 months sober ?”
Thanos raised his eyebrows, “Oh yeah, I guess I do have a mellow friend.”
“He’s an ex addict ?” You asked, not very surprised since it is Thanos’s friend.
“Yup, he almost died of a heroine overdose a few months back and has been clean from drugs and drinking ever since.” He grinned, “I’m proud of him.”
“I’m sorry did you say- Heroine ??”
Thanos nodded, “Yeah, I’m surprised heroine was the one that got to him. He was on all sorts of things: cocaine, ecstasy-“
Mi-na put both her hands on his shoulders, “Alright babe, he can fill her in, you don’t have to give her his whole backstory.” She raised her eyebrows at him and you knew that look too well, she was basically telling him to stop talking. “You’ll scare her off before she even goes on the date.”
“Yeah because if there’s nothing better than an addict, it’s a recovering one.” You muttered.
She crossed her arms, “Okay, so now he’s too mellow ?”
“No.” You narrowed your eyes at her, “I would love someone who doesn’t drink or do drugs but Mi-na he’s in recovery.”
“And ?”
“And ?! What if he relapses ? I don’t want to be somebody’s mom.” You spat, crossing your arms as well.
Mi-na pulled out her phone, “I think you’ll change your mind once you see a picture of him. He’s really cute.” She glanced over at her boyfriend, “I’m saying in the sense that she would find him cute, I know her type pretty well by now.”
She tossed her phone to you, “He’s the one in the white t-shirt.”
“Oh yeah, I recognize him, he’s the one that’s always holding onto Thanos whenever Thanos posts pictures of him and his friends.”
“He’s not always holding on to me ?”
You turned the phone so they could see the screen, “Dude he’s literally hugging your arm and his head is resting on your shoulder.”
Thanos looked at the phone, “It was cold that day.”
Mi-na laughed grabbing her phone, “Anyways, he’s single, sober, and cute. He’s perfect for you y/n.”
You pursed your lips, you were pretty lonely. You had friends but they all had partners which made it hard for you to hang out unless you wanted to third wheel like you are now.
“I mean… he is kind of cute I guess.”
Mi-na shrieked, “Yay ! Thanos will send him your number.” She kissed her boyfriend on the cheek and clapped her hands in excitement, “If this works out, we could even go on double dates !”
————
You and Nam-gyu had texted back and forth for a few days now, planning to have your first date this weekend. You suggested getting coffee and Nam-gyu loved the idea saying that he knows the perfect spot and sent you the address.
Once there, you spotted him sitting down. “Hey Nam-gyu right ?”
He looked up from his phone and smiled, quickly putting it away. “Yes and you must be y/n.” He stood up and gave you a friendly hug.
You felt yourself blushing from the contact, you knew he was touchy feely with Thanos but figured it was because they were friends.
He smelled of the ocean mixed with amber and you could tell from how healthy the ends of his hair looked he recently got a haircut.
“You’re going to love this place. It has everything: coffee, teas, desserts. It’s amazing.”
When you guys got to the front, the cashier asked what you guys wanted. Nam-gyu answered it fairly quickly, not giving your eyes much time to scan the menu above you.
After the cashier entered his order she looked at you, “umm-“ You made eye contact with Nam-gyu, “What would you recommend ? I’m more of a coffee person but there’s so many options.”
“Hmm… do you like your coffee more on the bitter or sweet side ?”
“Sweet.”
He smiled, “Then I’d suggest their Carmel Macchiato. It’s sounds boring, I know, but for your first time being here I’d start with that, it’s really good.”
You nodded your head and turned your attention back to the cashier, “I’ll get a small Carmel Macchiato please.”
“Okie dokie.” She typed in your order and then smiled while reading out your total.
Nam-gyu pulled out a twenty dollar bill and told her to keep the change, “Thank you.” She said, “We’ll call your order out when it’s ready.”
You guys walked over to a table and sat down across from each other, “Thank you for buying my coffee.” You blushed.
“Oh yeah of course.”
You rubbed your hands together under the table feeling them sweat. You haven’t been on a date in a while and have never had an actual boyfriend before so this was all new to you.
“How did you and Thanos meet ?” You asked, trying to ease your nerves by getting him to talk.
“I used to work at this club downtown and the owner of the club would always let him come in for free because it would attract more people to his club. After a while of being there, Thanos and I got familiar with each other and one day he asked me if I knew anybody who sold drugs. I hooked him up with one of my buddies and we started doing them together, the rest is history.”
You weren’t expecting him to be such an open book but felt yourself slowly becoming more comfortable around him, he seemed like a chill guy.
“One Americano and one Carmel Macchiato.”
“That’s us.” Nam-gyu said, he went over to the counter and grabbed your coffees. When he came back he handed you your drink and you thanked him.
“You wanna go take a walk ?” He asked.
“Sure.” You grinned, following him outside.
You actually preferred this, walking side by side instead of sitting down and looking at each other face to face. It took a lot of the pressure off and you found yourself talking a lot more than you thought you would.
He told you about his battle with addiction and how it nearly killed him. You felt bad for judging him so harshly when Thanos and Mi-na told you about it.
Getting his side of the story made you realize that he wasn’t just a a sleazy guy who drank and did drugs to have fun, he had past trauma that he was dealing with. Now that he’s sober, he told you he’s found better ways to cope like going to therapy and exercising.
He finished his drink first, throwing it away and a few minutes later you finished yours, throwing it in a trash bin as well.
You only knew him for about 30 minutes but already felt safe with him, like he was a long time friend.
“So…” you stopped walking and finally faced him making eye contact, “What now ?” You asked with a smile.
He returned the smile, “I really enjoyed our date and would like to continue it but it’s up to you. We can hang out another time if you’re busy.”
It was weird, you felt special for the first time in a while and that excited you. You didn’t want this date to end anytime soon either.
You bit your lip, “I had fun too.” You said, rocking back and forth a bit. “Would it be odd of me to ask you to hang out at my place ?”
“No, not at all.”
————
When you got to your place, Nam-gyu removed his jacket and you told him he could hang it up on the coat rack. He wore a brown tank top underneath his jacket and, every now and then, you caught yourself stealing glances of his veiny arms; and at the way the material would outline his chest and abdomen.
You guys continued chatting on the couch as you guys tried to find something to watch on Netflix. You ended up settling on a comedy that neither of you have seen yet.
He clicked a button to play the movie, setting the remote down on the arm rest next to him and then threw his other arm over the couch.
A thought popped into your head of scooting over and leaning into his side, but you knew that would be kind of weird. Then again, it seems that Nam-gyu’s love language is physical contact so maybe he wouldn’t mind ?
You casually scooted yourself over and Nam-gyu’s head turned. You looked up to meet his eyes, “Is this okay ?” You asked, scooting into his side and placing a hand on his chest.
He nodded, “Yeah I don’t mind.” His hand dropped to around your shoulders as he went back to watching the movie.
You tried watching the movie as well, you really did but all you could think about was his body against yours. The heat radiating off of him made you want to snuggle into him more like a weighted blanket.
Half way through the movie, you were able to concentrate on the plot a little bit, until Nam-guy’s thumb began rubbing back and forth on your arm. It was a simple gesture and you were pretty sure he was doing it unconsciously but it made the inside of your stomach fill with butterflies.
When the movie was over, Nam-gyu looked over at you. “It was alright, I thought it was kind of funny, how about you ?”
You turned and made eye contact with for a split second before licking your lips and attaching them to his. You were surprised by your hunger for him and you could tell he was shocked as well by the way he didn’t react for a few seconds.
When he reciprocated the kiss, you positioned your body on top of his. Your knees on either side of his legs, as your hands went to his hair.
His hands made their way to your hips pulling you closer into him and you moaned. Pulling away from him, you ripped your shirt off over your head, throwing it to the floor before reattaching your mouths.
His cold fingers snaked up your back, unclipping your bra. Once done, you threw it to the floor as well. One of his hands cupped your breast and you broke the kiss leaning your head against his.
“You okay ?” He whispered.
“Yeah.” You breathed, “But…”
He removed his hand from your breast, waiting for you to finish.
You sighed, “I know I’ve only known you for less than a day and I really like you.” You watched as your hands trialed down his chest, “And don’t get me wrong I really like what we have going on right now.”
You looked him in the eyes, he was smiling listening to you. “But I’m also not the kind of person to hook up with someone after just meeting them. I want to get to know you better before we get to that point.”
His hand cupped your face, caressing it with his thumb. “I respect that. Since my sobriety I’ve made a rule for myself as well, to not hook up with anybody unless we are dating. I’ve been doing good so far but I’ll be honest if you hadn’t stopped, I don’t think I would’ve stuck to it.” He blushed biting his lip.
You giggled, “I like that rule, I think I’ll adopt that as well.”
He smirked, “Does this mean cuddling is off the table too ?”
You rolled your eyes at his silly question, “Off course not.” You smiled before wrapping your arms around his neck and sinking into him. He interlocked his hands behind you while resting his head on your shoulder.
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magerightsmagefights · 2 days ago
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There’s a lot of good “what ifs” for a Rook. What if Rook is the child of HoF, of Hawke, bonded to this or that spirit, etc, but I'd like to make just one more suggestion for who Rook could be:
Cole.
He’s real now, all the way through, with a beating heart and a face that needs shaving every now and then. Varric never knew much about children, and Cole didn’t know much about parents, but everyone needs help to become a person. Things just fell into place. Cole has Varric’s shaving mirror now. The dwarf said “You should hang onto this,” and it took a few years for Cole to understand that actually meant, “It’s yours now.”
There was a hole in Varric after losing Hawke. Cole didn't need to be a spirit to understand that. "Rook" was a chess piece, but it was also a bird, and Varric loved to tell stories about heroes like that. Even in Thedas, this place of immovable fact and reality, Varric could change the world with his stories. He said that Rook was a hero, and like a spirit answering its own nature, Cole became one. Stories were lies, in their own way, but Varric used them to tell the truth.
Solas was the opposite. Solas preferred using the truth to tell lies.
Solas has never seen "Rook," and they hope it will take him off guard when the time comes. Varric's job is to "stop the Dread Wolf," but it edges close to "save the Dread Wolf." Cole prefers that. Solas was his friend, too, even after so much change. Cole hopes Solas will still recognize him with a human heart.
But that human heart can no longer sense blood magic.
Solas wants to be angry when the ritual fails. He wants to accuse. He wants deride. He wants Rook to be unworthy of his grace, but it all breaks to pieces when Cole stands before him. He used to know that spirit, just as he used to know Mythal. Like her, like Solas, like every broken spirit pulled into mortal flesh and forced to decay, Cole has the weight of years on his body. Cole is older. Cole is aging. Cole will die unless Solas brings down the Veil, but Cole wants to stop him. This world is going to kill him one way or another, and yet Cole fights as if this is something to be protected.
They understood each other once. Neither one is sure how much of that remains.
Cole approaches leadership with gentleness, the way he approaches everything. He cannot hear pain anymore, so he tends to his companions with words and hands like a gardener, with the spiritual tenderness only Compassion could muster. Most spirits are confused when the world refuses to shape itself at their command, but Cole has learned Varric's tricks. He knows that if he treats his companions like heroes, they will eventually become so. It's easy to follow a leader like that. It's easy to love a leader like that.
Solas does not know whether he pities the fallen spirit, or envies him. Cole is Compassion. Cole is damaged beyond repair. Cole is happy. Cole doesn't regret a second of it. All things in this world are temporary, and that only makes Cole love them more. Why does Cole think this is worth saving?
(Is Cole right?)
It nearly ruins Solas to leave Cole in that prison. The entire Lighthouse wouldn't have enough space to paint this regret. But he was once Wisdom, and Cole was merely Compassion, and Compassion is not a spirit built for these wicked choices. Better for Pride to carry the burden, because Solas has so many scars on his soul that one more won't make a difference.
Compassion would never have been able to escape that prison. But a human being? A human being knows how to change.
Solas is relieved, dismayed, astonished to see what the spirit has become. To know that change is the very reason Cole bested him.
(Was Varric right? Lavellan? Felassan? Mythal? Is this all for nothing?)
All those mistakes speak together in the end. Cole opens his mouth, and Varric speaks through him. Mythal beside them, Lavellan with forgiveness already on her tongue. Solas is free. This world can be more than his mistakes. There is space for flowers in between the bones. He cannot undo his wrongs, but he can soften them.
And it begins with, "I'm sorry."
Cole smiles. Of course he does. There was never any doubt that he would redeem Solas in the end. He touches the copper chain around his neck, and one of Bianca's broken arrows in his pocket.
"I know," he says, and there is an echo to it.
Cole is glad Solas turned toward redemption. He is glad Solas believed Varric after all this time. He knows what happened was an accident.
But Varric is gone. The dwarves are tranquil. The number of deaths it took to turn Solas' pride is higher than Cole could count. Compared to the Blight, Cole's friendship should seem like hardly any price at all. But losing this is perhaps the sharpest wound.
Cole understands him, in the way of Compassion spirits. But Cole is no longer Compassion. Cole is no longer Solas' friend. As they part ways, as the Fade-tear closes and Solas looks over his shoulder, they both know: Cole understands. But he will never forgive.
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fallinallincurls · 1 day ago
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Miles Away, I've Always Loved You
this is my entry for the 2025 winter fic exchange hosted by the lovely @wyattjohnston!! thank you as always for hosting!
my fic is for @writingonleaves! i had lots of fun writing this one and really hope you love it just as much.
hope you enjoy!! feedback is always appreciated! xx
word count: 5.1k
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The knock on the door startles Reagan out of her thoughts. She had been mentally trying to figure out how to organize the bookshelf in her living room now that it’s been built. 
The apartment is still mostly a mess. The move to Vancouver had been circled on her calendar for months, but Reagan knew the worst part about moving cross country completely by herself would be the unpacking and setting up of a new place. And so far, she’s been right. 
From putting together all the furniture on her own, opening and emptying box after box and feeling that same exhaustion hit her every few hours, the move has been an insane amount of work to say the least. But she couldn’t be happier knowing that she moved to this city that she’s still a little familiar with for the job of her dreams. That alone makes everything worth it.
There’s another knock at the door and Reagan lets out a deep sigh. She’s not expecting someone as no one in the city knows who she is since she just arrived three days ago. She abandons the stacks of books on the floor and heads to the door, wondering who could possibly be on the other side.
Without bothering to look through the peephole, which might’ve been a mistake, Reagan swings open the door to reveal a man she’s never seen before. He looks just a little older than her 25 years of age, has a big smile that wrinkles the corners of his eyes and his hair is neatly styled. Before she can even open her mouth to say anything, he’s already speaking.
“Oh, hey!” He says with an element of surprise in his voice. “I didn’t know Cap had a girl, but I’m new here so I'm still trying to learn all of that, you know?”
She doesn’t know in fact because she has no idea what he’s talking about and the confusion must be evident on Reagan’s face because he continues talking in effort to explain.
“Um, I’m here for the team dinner? Apparently it’s tradition here for the captain to host everyone before training camp starts and so I brought this,” he shows you a bottle of expensive wine and then a container of store bought cookies, “and these.”
Everything the stranger standing in front of her has said only made the situation more odd. Team dinner? Tradition? He clearly mixed up numbers and is at the wrong apartment.
“I’m sorry,” she starts, but is almost immediately cut off when another voice calls out from down the hallway.
“Jake!” 
The man turns towards the voice and a look of recognition passes over his face as his smile seemingly becomes brighter at the sight of whoever said his name. 
“Q!” He says brightly, before returning his attention to her. “I’m sorry, I must’ve mixed up the apartment numbers.”
“It’s no problem.” Reagan reassures him before he waves a goodbye and starts heading to the apartment next to hers. The curiosity gets the better of her and she glances over to see who “Q” was and that’s when everything comes to a halt.
Because Q, or cap as Jake also called him, is Quinn Hughes. Her ex-boyfriend. The love of her life. And now, apparently, her next door neighbor.
Quinn must have sensed another pair of eyes on him because he looks over and meets her gaze. A look of disbelief crosses over his face for a split second, his brows furrowed in confusion as he realizes who his teammate bothered in the mixup.
“Reagan?” 
It might have been two years since the last time she saw him, but hearing her name rolling off his tongue still had the same effect on her as it did then.
“Quinn?” She asks in response, unable to comprehend that he’s standing less than 100 feet away from her. Quinn. Her Quinn. 
“Yeah, it’s me. What are you doing here?”
“I, uh, just moved in a few days ago.” Reagan starts to explain and then a rush of worry hits her. “I finally got the job I’ve been waiting for and it just so happened to be here in Vancouver. I had no idea you lived in this building at all,”
“Hey, it’s okay.” Quinn says softly, cutting off her rambling. “Congratulations, I know how hard you worked to get through school and do everything you could to get this job.”
“Thank you.” Reagan murmurs, pushing her hair behind her ear and nervously dropping her gaze to the floor. All the heartbreak from the last few years has disappeared in the matter of seconds and it almost feels like she’s back there. In a time where they were still together and so in love with each other.
But Reagan knows that’s not her reality anymore. Now, she’s standing in her doorway looking at the man who she gave her heart to all those years ago, but now he’s almost a stranger. Just her neighbor in a new city.
“Uh, I know this is probably unexpected and way too sudden, but do you want to come over for dinner? There’s definitely enough food and everything.”
Reagan feels a wave of surprise wash over her at his offer and even though her heart is screaming to say yes, she knows she can’t accept. At least not right now.
“Thank you for offering, but I’m okay. Still trying to get adjusted and all. Another time?” She replies, trying to push away the want that’s arisen within her. She wants to spend time with him even if she hasn’t seen him in a while and her heart is still a little broken. Quinn nods in understanding, a strand of hair falling perfectly over his forehead, but Reagan sees the familiar look of sadness in his blue green eyes.
A loud yell erupts from inside Quinn’s apartment disrupting the quiet air around the two of them.
“I should probably get back. Almost the entire team is in there and I don’t trust a lot of them by themselves.” Quinn chuckles and Reagan feels a smile tug at her lips. “It was really great to see you. I hope Vancouver treats you well.”
“Thanks, Quinn. Same to you.” 
Quinn flashes you a sweet smile before ducking back inside. When the door to his apartment closes behind him, Reagan lets out a breath she didn’t even realize she was holding. Not only does she have to navigate life in a new city with a new job, but now she has to handle living next to her ex, the man who was her everything, on top of everything else.
The memories that came rushing back the moment she realized it was him standing in the hallway linger in her mind for a little longer. All the shared kisses, big hugs after good and bad games, nights on the porch at the lake house in the offseason, his unwavering support for everything she did, early mornings spent cuddling and so much more. 
Reagan knew when they broke up that she would miss him for the rest of her life, but it feels like the wound has been reopened seeing him unexpectedly in person. Of course, she’s kept tabs on him by tuning into a few Canucks games and for a while, Jack was sending her regular life updates but those slowly came to an end. 
Her heart aches knowing she is going to have to see him more often now that they’re neighbors. It’s a curveball she never saw coming or even considered when she chose to move to the city that he lives and plays in. But here she is. 
With a shake of her head, Reagan clears her mind and pushes open her front door again. There’s relief that the entire interaction is over, both with Quinn and his teammate, but in a strange way, she also misses talking to him already.
Nothing could prepare her for randomly seeing the man she still loved years after he broke her heart. 
A few days later, Reagan gets a strong sense of deja vu. She’s attempting to put together the coffee table for the third time, after the first two tries were unsuccessful, when there’s a knock at her door.
A heavy sigh slips past your lips as she drops the useless IKEA instructions to the floor. She’s already preparing a little speech in her head in anticipation it’s another one of Quinn’s teammates who got the apartment numbers mixed up again.
“Hey, sorry, Quinn is-“ Reagan starts as the door swings open and reveals the blue green eyed, curly haired hockey player who lives next door. “here?” She finishes, more like a question than a statement.
“Hey,” Quinn says, flashing that soft smile that makes her heart melt. “I, um,” he pauses, almost as if collecting his thoughts to get exactly what he wants to say correct. “I know how hard it is to move to a new place by yourself having done it myself so I wanted to help with anything you need. And I brought breakfast too. Hopefully your usual order hasn’t changed.”
Reagan’s heart swells with adoration, remembering this is the version of Quinn she fell in love with. The kind, thoughtful man who continuously surprised her in ways she never thought possible. And against all odds, here he is again.
She’s stunned into silence for a few seconds, overwhelmed by his offer. It’s genuine and shows he cares even after all this time but allowing him to help means spending time with him, reconnecting, and Reagan doesn’t know if she’s ready for that just yet.
But she also really wants that coffee table to be built. So for right now, the pros outweigh the cons.
“Thank you so much, Quinn. That’s really thoughtful of you and honestly, there are a few things I’ve realized I can’t accomplish by myself no matter how hard I try.”
Quinn’s smiling genuinely now. He can’t believe she’s letting him help despite the fact they haven’t seen each other in a while minus the mixup the other day. But he doesn’t care. This is his opportunity to catch up with her and he’s going to cherish every second.
“That’s why I’m here.” He chuckles in response, handing her the iced coffee and bagel he picked up for her. “Order still the same?” He asks again, more out of curiosity than anything.
“Order’s still the same. I’m more surprised you remembered it.”
Of course he remembers it. He remembers everything about Reagan despite the fact there was a time where he wished he could forget everything about her. He remembers the show she would only watch before bed and the scent of her favorite shampoo. He remembers the feel of her hand in his and the way he always felt so safe with her in his arms. He remembers her go-to lazy dinner and the songs she loved screaming at the top of her lungs in the car.
He remembers it all. But now, Reagan feels like a stranger for so many reasons.
Quinn takes this moment to really look at her. She’s still breathtakingly gorgeous. but he notices her wavy dark brown hair is lighter than he remembers it. Maybe she got highlights or has dyed it since the breakup. There are more freckles scattered across her cheeks than there were when they met. She’s wearing an old oversized Umich shirt that he realizes at the last second might be his. But when her brown eyes meet his, any anxiety he feels about this moment falls away.
This is still Reagan. His Reagan. Yes, it’s been a while but he knows her. She hasn’t changed that much. If she’s letting him help and being friendly, maybe she doesn’t hate him like he always thought she did after the way things ended between them.
“Of course I remember it.” Quinn says with a shrug, trying not to reveal how much he misses her. “So what do you need help with first?” He asks as Reagan waves him into her apartment and closes the door behind him.
Reagan explains her dilemma with the uncooperative coffee table which takes first priority before going through a small list of things she wanted to get done today like unpack her kitchen and finish building her vanity. Quinn nods along to everything she says, seemingly happy to offer his help even if he doesn’t] have to.
“Thank you,” Reagan says softly, the two words holding more meaning than she ever thought could be possible. Quinn gives her a slightly confused look as he sits down on the floor ready to tackle the coffee table. “For everything. You didn’t have to bring breakfast over and offer to help me get settled in considering we haven’t seen each other in a long time, but I really do appreciate it.” 
“I’d do anything for you, Rea.”
Hearing that one line and the use of the nickname only Quinn has ever used for her sends a shiver through her body. She feels her heart being tugged in his direction again even if it never fully healed from their end years ago, but she desperately tries to keep herself in check. Their relationship came to an end because of him. Quinn wanted to focus solely on hockey and his need to constantly get better on the ice was more important than keeping her in his life. 
So she moved on after he broke her heart. Or she thought she did until she saw him the other day. Her feelings have rushed back in no time, like nothing happened in the first place, but Reagan knows better.
“I know,” she murmurs, voice quiet as the wave of emotions hit her. “I’m going to start unpacking the kitchen. Let me know if you need any help. The instructions have been useless.” Quinn chuckles, that adorable sound filling her with a sense of happiness she hasn’t felt in so long. To this day his laugh is still one of her favorite sounds in the whole entire world.
For a good hour or so, the two of them work in comfortable silence. A random playlist Reagan selected is playing from a bluetooth speaker and every once in a while, she hears Quinn curse under his breath. She catches herself smiling a few times, the familiarity of it all bringing back so many memories. 
“Reagan?” Quinn tentatively disrupts the quiet as she’s reaching up to place a stack of plates in a cabinet above the kitchen counter. 
“Hm?” She hums in response, letting out a sign of relief when she gets the plates on the shelf. Quinn is grinning at the sight of her on her tiptoes trying to reach a higher shelf in her new home. This is something else that hasn’t changed since they were together. She still refuses to use any help to reach higher places despite being small enough that it would be beneficial. 
“Coffee table is finished.” He says, pointing over his shoulder when she turns around to look at him. “You weren’t lying about it being difficult, but it’s done.” A look of surprise crosses over her face and something about her right then makes Quinn’s heart ache. 
He knows he messed up when he broke it off with her years ago. His head was too stuck on hockey and only hockey. There was an unbearable amount of pressure on his shoulders after being drafted and he felt like he had to not only live up to the expectations, but defy them. And through all that, he lost the greatest thing to ever happen to him.
Reagan.
The woman who showed him unconditional love from the moment they met in college all the way through to the very end. Reagan who was there for every accomplishment and disappointment that happened in his career. The woman who always made sure he knew so many people, including her, were unbelievably proud of him at all times no matter what happened.
He never thought he would get to see her again and somehow here he is in her apartment that’s right next to his in the city that he’s been his second home for the last six years. 
“Told you I wasn’t lying.” She laughs, the sound filling Quinn with joy like it always has. “We can tackle the vanity next if you’re up for it. It’s a lot for just one person.” 
She leads him into her office where the unopened box is laying on the ground where she envisions the piece of furniture. Without a moment of hesitation, they get started on building the vanity as conversation flows freely. Quinn fills her in on everything going on with the Canucks from new teammates to how he likes being captain. She listens as he recommends some new restaurants and places to check out around the city and she fills him in on how everyone is doing back home in Michigan. Quinn asks about her new job and he can’t hide how proud he is when she tells him she got accepted into the Vancouver Symphony Orchestra. 
Reagan has been playing the french horn since fourth grade and that’s the entire reason they met in college since Quinn ran into her at a UMich football game when she was part of the marching band. He remembers being struck by how pretty she was then even in the slightly unflattering bright blue and yellow uniform she was wearing with her instrument in hand. Over time as they became friends and eventually got together, Quinn learned her biggest dream was to play in a symphony. It’s difficult to get a seat anywhere, but if anyone could do it, Quinn knew it would be her. Reagan was talented, always has been, and knowing all that hard work finally paid off makes him beyond happy. 
And secretly, he’s never been so glad that the music she loves so much brought her to the city he lives in now.
“I was nervous about being accepted. It’s one of the most prestigious symphonies on the West Coast, but I was sick of being in Michigan again even if I do love it there, so I took a chance and it worked out.” Reagan explains shyly, her eyes dropping to her fiddling fingers.
“Hey,” Quinn says, abandoning the half built vanity for a second to take hold of her hands. “I’m so proud of you. You deserve that seat and it’s incredibly brave of you to pack up and move halfway across the continent to live out your dream.”
They both are aware of the unspoken words there. That it was also brave to come back to the city where their love story crashed and burned.
“Thank you, Quinny. That means a lot.” The words are barely out of Reagan’s mouth before Quinn is wrapping his strong arms around her in a tight embrace. She melts into the hug, her head resting on his shoulder and lets the comfort wash over her. Quinn lets out a small sigh of relief. He missed having her in his arms and the feeling of peace that surrounds him is unmistakable.
God, he messed up so bad by letting her go, by ruining the best thing he’s ever had because he thought he couldn’t balance the pressure of being an NHL player and a relationship at the same time. 
“Good to know Huggy Bear’s still got it.” Reagan teases him, reluctantly pulling away even if she wants to stay in his arms forever. But she can’t. She’s not that girl for him anymore.
“Yeah, yeah.” Quinn laughs, used to hearing the nickname his teammates gave him years ago when he joined the team. He meets her gaze and it’s then that an idea hits him. Reagan can see the look of hesitation in his blue green eyes, but waits patiently for him to continue. “Whenever you get settled in here and everything, would you maybe want to go skating? I know we used to go all the time and there’s this cool rink downtown you would love, but no pressure if not. I’m sure you’re going to be busy with work and adjusting to a new city.”
Reagan knows she should say no. She knows it would be better to leave the past in the past. But something about the way Quinn asks with pure honesty tugs at her and the small hope that maybe their love could get a second chance after all this time blossoms.
So she says yes.
“I would love that. Just text me when you’re free and we can schedule something.”
Quinn’s happiness at her response is immediately noticeable even though he tries to hide it so it’s not as obvious. The smile Reagan adores so much is on full display and she couldn’t be happier to have him in her half furnished apartment just days after she moved back to the city where her heart was broken.
Before she can get too swept up in the emotions, she gently pushes Quinn’s chest and giggles.
“We’ve got a list of things to do, Hughes. Get back to work.”
And with that, both of them work together to get through all the tasks Reagan wanted accomplished. That familiar sense of peace envelops the apartment and for the first time in a long time, Reagan’s heart isn’t heavy with sadness. Instead, it swells with joy like no other.
Between Quinn’s busy schedule of games, practices and traveling and Reagan’s new work schedule of getting acquainted with the symphony and joining practices of her own, it took a few weeks for them to find a day to go skating together.
But in that time, a constant stream of texts were exchanged and phone calls were made whether Quinn was next door or on the road. Reagan learned all about what happened in Quinn’s life for the two years she wasn’t part of it and heard so many stories of his teammates and his brothers, who she also missed since she hadn’t spoken to either of them since the breakup.
Quinn got a glimpse into who Reagan is now and if possible, he feels himself falling even harder for her all over again. His feelings never truly went away but every time he heard her laugh or she shared a secret, he knew that even after all that time, this girl is still the one he wants.
Finally, the agreed upon Sunday arrives and Quinn’s quiet, but strong knock sounds through Reagan’s apartment as she pulls a beanie on her head. 
“Coming!” She yells, almost tripping on her way to the door. She’s nervous and excited all at once. When the door swings open, Reagan’s breath is stolen away for a second as Quinn stands in front of her looking extra cozy and comfy bundled up for the cold. His eyes are alight with wonder and his somewhat wild brown curls are peeking out from under his favorite navy blue beanie. He has a hoodie on under his winter jacket and there’s the faintest blush spreading across his cheeks.
“Hey, Rea,” Quinn greets her with a bright smile. The old nickname still sends a jolt of happiness through her veins even though he’s used it frequently over the last few weeks and she can’t help but feel hopeful. Maybe this is just the two of them going skating together, but there is a sense of something more in the air and if there’s even a chance Quinn wants to give their relationship another chance, Reagan is all in. She can tell he’s grown and matured in the time they’ve spent apart and if she didn’t see that, it would be much easier to ignore the feelings she has for him.
“Hey!” She replies, giving him a quick hug. Quinn is a little surprised, but welcomes the embrace for a moment before she pulls away and starts speaking in excitement. “Don’t worry about skates for me, I still use my favorite pair,” Reagan lifts her white pair of Bauer skates up and then glances at her warm, but cute winter outfit, “and I’m dressed for the weather since you said the rink is outside.”
“You’re all prepared,” Quinn chuckles, “Let’s go then.” He says almost sheepishly like he’s nervous all of the sudden, and reaches for her hand. Reagan intertwines her gloved fingers with his and offers him a reassuring smile to silently say “this is okay.” The rink is just a few blocks away from their shared apartment building so the walk over is cold, but brief and full of laughter and conversation between the two of them.
Reagan catches a glimpse of the rink when Quinn stops walking at the opening of a large clearing and her heart starts racing.
They are at Robson Square Ice Rink. The prettiest rink in all of Vancouver in Reagan’s opinion, but it’s also her favorite and was dubbed her and Quinn’s spot when they were dating. 
“Quinn,” Reagan breathes out in disbelief. She doesn’t need to say anything else, Quinn can read all the emotions on her face. He squeezes her hand in reassurance while flashing her a sweet smile before leading her to the benches to help put her skates on. 
“Come on,” He murmurs and Reagan swallows down the emotions in an effort to take in every detail of this moment. She immediately starts unlacing her skates when they claim a spot on the bench, but Quinn insists on doing it himself.
“I can do it myself, you know.”
“I know,” Quinn replies cheekily. “But you deserve to be taken care of so let me do it even if it’s just this one time.” Reagan sighs, in pure dramatics, which makes Quinn chuckle but her heart is warm and fuzzy. This is why she fell in love with him in the first place. He’s the most caring person she knows and would do anything for her. That much clearly hasn’t changed.
Reagan keeps her eyes on Quinn as he ties her skates perfectly until he taps the heel of her right skate to signal that she’s good to go and freezes. Her brows furrowed in confusion for a moment until it hits her.
Quinn got these skates for her years ago. They were her first pair and one of the best gifts she has ever received. But after taking them out for a few spins, she noticed that he had them customized. There was a little blue 43 printed onto the outside of the heel on her right skate which is exactly what Quinn is staring at right now.
“It’s still there.” He says quietly, tracing the two numbers before meeting Reagan’s eyes. It’s almost as if he expected her to cover the numbers up herself after the breakup and although she was angry about how everything happened, these skates are a reminder of the blissful beginning and she wanted that to remain untouched.
“Of course it is.” And just like earlier, this feels as if the simple moment holds a double meaning. As if that tiny 43 is a sign of hope for Quinn that he might get a second chance. That there’s still a spot for him in Reagan’s heart.
They share soft smiles and sit in the comfortable silence for a moment as Quinn puts his skates on. When Quinn takes her hand to help her onto the ice, Reagan lets herself be fully present. Months ago she never thought about reconnecting with the man who broke her heart, but now she couldn’t be happier that they’re friends again. She missed him beyond words.
It took a few laps around the rink to get her footing back, but once she did, she was challenging Quinn to races and constantly giggling as he tried to distract her from skating smoothly. Despite being one of the most well recognized people in the entire city of Vancouver, no one bothered Quinn on the public outdoor rink even if a few of the younger kids kept a watchful eye on him as if they recognized the captain of their favorite hockey team.
“How is it so far?” Quinn asks out of the blue as the two of them are skating at a leisurely pace. Reagan takes in the city skyline around them before meeting his gaze.
“Skating? Good! I always forget how fun it is and-”
“No,” he gently cuts you off and shakes his head, “I mean living in Vancouver. I know it’s been a huge adjustment for you.”
“Oh,” Reagan says in realization, taking a moment to think. “It’s been way better than I expected, honestly.” Quinn raises his eyebrows in surprise as an adorable smile blossoms across his face.
“Really?”
“Yeah and I have a sneaky feeling you already know you’re a big part of why that is, Quinny.” His cheeks become pink with blush and he looks down briefly before stopping the two of you for a second.
“Have you ever thought of giving us a second chance?” 
The question is like a punch to the gut. Not only because Reagan never saw it coming, but it is exactly what she’s thought of asking Quinn herself a thousand times.
Has she thought of giving them another chance? Yes. Every single day she wonders what it would be like to be his girlfriend again. To allow herself to feel the overwhelming love she has for the oldest Hughes brother. To feel at home again because he’s back in her life. And Reagan has come to realize that she wants a second chance with Quinn more than anything.
He’s proven that he has grown and matured from the man he was years ago when he shattered her heart into a million pieces. He’s shown that her life and her dreams are just as important and he’ll do anything he can to support her every single day. His love has been on display since the first moment she saw him in the hallway of their apartment building weeks ago.
“Yes. Every single day.” Reagan responds with nothing but pure honesty.
“Me too.” Quinn almost whispers, trying not to let his nerves show. He’s biting his lip, a nervous habit of his that hasn’t disappeared. “Uh, you can say no if you’re not ready or anything, but would you like to go out with me? On a proper first date? Again?” 
Instantly, a beaming smile is on Reagan’s face as his words process in her mind. It’s happening. Something she’s dreamed of for so long, it’s real.
“I’d love that, Quinn.” She hugs him tight, relishing in the joy rushing through her veins. Nothing could make this moment any better and when Quinn kisses her temple, also feeling the happiest he’s been in a long time, everything in the world feels right again.
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screamlet · 2 days ago
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“I wish you would write a fic where…” Through whatever contrivance, Buck tries to woo Tommy back through trivia. Maybe he gets Tommy’s team in on it, or the emcee/host - but it’s all Tommy-themed questions because Buck is trying to prove he knows him. Does it work? Maybe it’s all surface level and it hurts Tommy as much as he appreciates it. Maybe he revealed more than he thought and Buck was listening, taking it all in. Maybe Tommy decided to participate against him and inadvertently reveals something or accidentally says he loves him or something. If you would like it, I humbly offer whatever you can do with this premise!
heeeeey it took one million years but here's something!!! i love shenanigans, i hope this lives up to them.
bucktommy fix-it, 2k
read on the ao3!
---
Tommy's not exactly kidnapped.
He's met in the parking lot at Harbor by Hen, Karen, and a couple of big smiles, and then shoved into the backseat of their car and driven off somewhere. 
"You know, it's been my experience that some people text when they want to hang out," Tommy says.
"So you did ignore my voicemails!" Karen yells. "I knew it."
"It's not personal!" Tommy says.
"I'm taking it very personal," Hen replies. "Like hell you're leaving the Christmas card list again." 
"I'll move."
"Not in this housing market."
Tommy groans because it's true. 
And see, that's a little crazy but a little fun, to know that they care enough to abduct him and take him out for the night. It's then not really surprising that Howie's waiting for them at the bar they used to frequent ages ago, when Tommy was still at the 118. 
"I got the cuffs," Howie announces, a pair of very-real looking handcuffs dangling from his fingers.
"Those better not be for me," Tommy says as Karen pulls him out of the car with shocking strength. 
"Don't worry, they're not LAPD property," Hen assures him. "They're Bobby's."
"Please stop making me learn things," Tommy says.
He's already handcuffed. Howie's living-with-a-toddler sleight-of-hand has gotten unreal. 
It's around this time that one shock wears off and another dawns: this is a scheme and Tommy is trapped.
"No no no no, whatever you're doing—"
"Chim, no!"
The bar's tables have been cleared from the center to make two long tables facing each other. Fine, cute, two teams, it's now clear to Tommy that he has to win Evan back or something with trivia. The difference, though, are the two chairs in the center, where Evan is already sitting (and handcuffed). He turns around, almost tipping the chair over except Eddie catches him. 
"Fine, whatever," Tommy says as he's sat in the chair next to Evan. To make things better/worse (because Evan's so fucking squirmy), their chairs are put back to back so they can be tied together, too. "Oh, we're going full Last Crusade, are we, Howie?" Tommy has to grunt because Athena ties a really, really good knot and again: he wishes he knew less. 
"If you had answered your phone," Bobby says coolly. "If you had bubbled less and texted more—"
Tommy whips his head around and smashes his skull right into Evan's. "Goddamn—you saw that? Why didn't you text, if you were just sitting there watching me type?"
Evan struggles against everything keeping them together, then finally says, "Because you left and you didn't want me! If you wanted me, you would have called! And now we're—" One more hard thrash that gets Tommy in the shoulder. "Kidnapped and this is your fault."
"It's my fault? You wanted me to give up—"
"No I didn't! I said something dumb and you walked out before—"
"No, no, no, we can talk later," Eddie says. "It's time for Buckley-Kinard Family Feud."
Tommy and Evan turn their heads at the same time. "The hell are you talking about?" Tommy asks. 
"It's time to draft your teams," Hen announces. "I'm hosting, so I'm removing myself from the pool."
"This isn't fair! It's Buck's family—"
"You didn't just call me that in front of everyone," Evan hisses. 
"It's Buck's family against me, I don't have anyone—"
"I'm drafting myself," Howie announces. "Buck, your turn."
"Fine, I pick Maddie," Evan replies.
"Don't sound too thrilled," she replies. 
"Your next pick?" Hen asks Tommy.
"I told you, I don't—"
Bobby comes over to his side.
"You're insane," Tommy says. 
"That's not fair!" Evan yells.
"I met him first, Buck," Bobby says placidly. 
"Yeah, but—ugh, fine, then I pick Athena." Evan turns his head and bumps into Tommy's again. "You better not pick Eddie."
"I'm picking Karen," Tommy says. "She's my friend who's a lesbian—"
He can feel Evan tense against his back, probably out of frustration and a deep, deep desire to slam his skull into Tommy's again. He doesn't know how Evan resists.
"I've been bisexual for like, nine months, could you cut me some slack?" Evan asks.
"You spent an entire afternoon reading me articles and watching videos about the three-body problem and you couldn't fucking bother—"
"Because then I'd know," Evan yells. "I'd know that you and me were too good to be true, and I'd know that it was just temporary, and I'd know that you can't live your whole life one way and suddenly a guy kisses you and everything, everything is different, and your life's completely changed! I'd find something that would tell me it can't happen, it's probably not real, and then I'd realize I was wasting your time because I can never really change. If I looked at us too hard, I'd know it was just—"
Tommy's so overwhelmed, his chest so tight, that all he can manage to say is: "Yeah, it's called biphobia, and if you had asked, I don't know, one of the three gay people in your life—"
"I didn't know what to ask, Tommy! Fuck!" Evan tries to struggle out of their bindings again, but then he stops. "Apologize to me for being such a dick about this." 
The room is tense and quiet, eerily quiet, until Tommy finally says, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, okay? You're right and I'll stop throwing that at you. It's really unfair. It's unfair of me and unfair of, I don't know, the whole world, that made you think this could never be for you."
"That you could be it for me," Evan corrects.
"Sure, whatever." Tommy's voice is nowhere near as light and bitchy as he meant that to sound. "So are we gonna play this game or what? Now that we've got some teams of dubious quality?"
Bobby takes a seat at what is now, apparently, the Team Tommy table. "I know you like fresh pasta because then you can have soft pasta and no one will call you a heretic for not liking it al dente." 
"That's psychotic," Tommy says. "And no one cooks it true al dente, it's always just barely cooked and I shouldn't have to chomp on pasta like a horse to enjoy it!"
Evan says, "And all of you said I was the weird one and he was the normal one."
"Literally no one said that, Buck," Eddie says. "You're both absurd, that's why you're perfect for each other."
"Well," Evan says, "I know you were thinking it."
"You were thinking it, and sometimes thoughts have to make it out of your mouth for people to hear them," Tommy snaps.
The entire room bursts into an uproar and Tommy tries to struggle out of his chair again. "Fine, fine, I'm a huge hypocrite, can I get a point for admitting it!" 
"Yes, just one," Hen says. "Alright, gather up, teams. Bobby and Maddie, you're up first."
"This is a nightmare, this is a nightmare," Tommy whispers to himself. "I crashed my helicopter and this is hell."
"Hey, Mr. Keeping Your Thoughts Inside, we can't hear the question," Howie says.
"You're on my team, you have to be nice to me!"
Howie dramatically pops his piece of gum and says nothing.
"This first question is in the category of fashion," Hen reads off her phone. The TV over the bar has turned on to show a Family Feud style board with four options and Tommy can't believe his vision of hell is this detailed. It's impressive. "Name one novelty apron belonging to either Buck or Tommy."
Bobby slams his hand on the buzzer that someone brought for the occasion. "Tommy has one that says Warning: Fowl Language and it has a rooster on it." Bobby points at Tommy and says, "Sal gave it to you for your fake birthday, which is June 13, but your real birthday is in November."
The room is quiet again.
"You had a fake birthday?" Evan asks.
Tommy looks up at the ceiling. This means that he and Evan's heads are touching and he can't help but lean into it a little. He doesn't go any further, though. "Did I mention I'm like… that there's a lot of things wrong with me?"
"Yeah, these are really struggling to stay in the quirks category," Karen says. "But hell yes, one point! Let's go, Bobby!"
Bobby rejoins the team and Hen strolls down to their side of the room. "Now, Karen: can you name another apron that Tommy owns?"
Karen winces. "Okay, this can be any apron?"
"Any apron," Hen agrees.
"Alright, then I'm gonna say… a plain, utilitarian grey apron that he wears because he doesn't want to use the nice ones." 
Hen says, "Show me boring!"
The word charcoal appears on the board with a (2) next to it.
"Two charcoal ones?" Maddie asks. "Tommy, love yourself."
"Yeah, I think that's the point here and I hate it," Tommy replies.
"Alright, Chim," Hen says. "Name another apron in Tommy's kitchen."
"I think we all saw Buck's lockscreen this summer," Howie says. "Tommy in a sleeveless shirt with a black apron that said Flippin' Awesome and had two spatulas crossed on the front."
"Show me spatulas!" Hen calls out. Another point. 
"Cheap shot," Tommy says. "Evan gave me that, of course you knew that."
"Hey, genius, how do you think people learn things about each other?" Howie asks. "Hen, take it away." 
"Alright, Team Buck," Hen says, wandering over to Maddie. "Name an apron you can find in Buck's kitchen." She turns her head and says, "And don't think we didn't notice he's Evan again."
Tommy turns his head away and whispers to Evan, "Can you make them stop? Please?"
"Sorry, do you think I wanted to be tied and handcuffed to you tonight?" A beat. "Okay, that's not—whatever, I'm suffering here, too."
"Are you?"
Evan huffs. "I'm tired of chasing after people who don't want me, and you don't want me." 
Tommy stays quiet as Team Buck racks up bonus points for Evan's punny apron collection. 
"I thought you'd call or text, or come over," Evan says, voice quieter. "You said, no matter how bad I want to be, so I thought… I don't know. I waited, Tommy. That didn't feel like the end. And you never answered my voicemails, so."
"I haven't checked my voicemail in five months," Tommy admits. "I saw you left a couple the week after and I just—I couldn't. I knew I'd—I'd press play and before you'd even said Hey I would be in my truck on my way to you."
"And would that have been so bad?"
Tommy drops his head down. "I wanted a clean break so we could both walk away." 
"Tommy," Evan whispers. "No matter how bad you want that to be true… it's not."
Tommy nods to himself. "I'm sorry."
"I should have come after you," Evan says. "I should have broken down your door or, I don't know, hung onto your helicopter like Captain America."
"Yeah, good luck," Tommy laughs. 
Between them, Evan's fingertips reach for Tommy's. They cling the best they can, and Tommy—he clings back. 
"Do you mean it or do you just want to get away from everyone?" Evan asks.
"Well, apparently I can't get away from them." Evan laughs dryly, so Tommy clutches his fingers again. "I mean it. Both of those things. If they take the cuffs off, I won't run. Will you?"
Evan laughs. "Only if you'll follow."
"Then we should make a break for it."
"You got it."
---
read on the ao3!
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bibookdemon · 2 days ago
Text
Chat. Gay chicken(?) with Shang Qinghua and Shen Yuan.
Warning for some nsfw aspects further down ;3
-Started out as SQH writing LBH as bi in PIDW, he was catering to the fans so suddenly LBH discovers he's also into men lmfao, so he writes a smut scene between LBH and another man and it is so much worse than any of the other smut. Bro did not do any of his fucking research. He has no fucking clue.
-Some of the fans eat it up but SY is like NUH UH THIS IS SHIT. And of course he writes that it's shit.
-For once, SQH writes back: 'Like YOU would know, you rich fucking asshole!' (He's gathered that SY has enough money he can sit around all day and leave bad reviews on his story.)
-SY is all 'Of course I know, idiot! Literally everyone knows how to write gay smut!!'
-And SQH is too deep in his rage to think about what he's saying so: 'Prove it then.'
-SY is also too deep. 'Come to XX on XX day.'
-They meet at a bustling coffeeshop that's super cute and geared towards couples. SY's first impression of SQH is 'wow he's short' and SQH's first impression of SY is 'yeah he looks fucking gay.' And he's pretty sure he's gonna eat his words.
-They go on a fucking coffee date. SY buys him coffee, they get a cute table in a semi-private corner, they actually get to talking and everything is kinda chill.
-SQH eventually remembers that hey, this guy is the jerk who leaves shitty comments on his story. So he tells him to man tf up and prove he knows about gay smut.
-SY is now scrambling to figure it out. He does not, in fact, know how to write gay smut. He does not, in fact, know how to prove it. So, now that he's panicking, he does the unexpected to divert SQH's attention: He slides a hand over SQH's, leans it, and kisses him right on the lips. 'How's this for gay?'
-SQH is absolutely surprised and flustered and also holy fuck that was like a really good kiss and low-key he wants to be kissed like that again but- 'still doesn't prove anything - unless you're unable to prove it'
-SY is in this too deep and has too much pride to give in. So he decides to go for another shock factor. He gets out his phone and he calls his favorite hotel. And he books a room. And SQH is just thinking to himself 'what the fuck have I gotten myself into' but of course he's not gonna back out! He has too much pride as well, and hey, a hotel room is better than his dingy little place, and maybe he also wants some more of those kisses.
-They go to the hotel in SY's car (SQH took the bus to get to the coffee shop) and then they're at the hotel and then SY is initiating a quick, sloppy kiss in the parking lot and SQH is feeling a little turned on and then- they have to go inside
-He figured SY was rich, but he didn't realize just HOW rich the bastard was. Bro got a fucking suite. It's huge, the bed is nice, the moment they're inside the room, SY's tongue is down his throat.
-After that, they both sorta stumble through the steps, SQH is too busy being turned on and wanting more kissing to recognize that SY is fumbling with everything and is sweating buckets and trembling cause he's so nervous. When it was time to put the condom on SY was so worried he was gonna rip it lmfao
-And they fuck, and it's awkward but also good, and SQH afterwards is just like 'you should prove you know how to write gay smut more often. To me.'
-SY is just like 'yeah, yeah,' he's tired and he wants to sleep and he just grabs SQH and snuggles him cause it feels right.
-Morning rolls around and they both realize what they just did + what they said they'd do in the future. And they're both looking at each other wide-eyed. And finally, SQH is all, 'Look Cucumber-bro, I don't know about you, but I had a fun time, and fuck all the stupid shit about writing gay smut, I want to BE the gay smut.'
-And SY is just like 'Ok,' because he has nothing better to say but he doesn't mind SQH's reasoning and he liked the sex.
-They'd be fucking hilarious. Poor SY doesn't know what he signed up for, SQH ends up having this endless stamina + an endless torrent of new ideas for them to try. 'I have to know how it works for the story!!! The fans are eating up my writing lately!!!!' - And SY has come to find SQH absolutely adorable and he can't say no to that cute face.
-They're just fuck-buddies at first, but they eventually develop a crush on each other, have a whole dramatic situation over that, and then start dating. (SY starts showering SQH in rich gifts lmao - some of them are useful some art, SQH loves all of them cause omg his boyfriend loves him and gift-giving is part of his love language.)
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blueberrypancakesworld · 3 days ago
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Cool off in the lake
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Jason x fem!reader
warning: fluff, flirting, nervous sweet Jason, kiss
summary: In summer, it was usually much too hot for sporting activities, especially in the camp, so the kids had retreated to the somewhat 'cool' huts. But Jason and his colleague had to hold the fort outside, those were the rules. She decided to just sunbathe while Jason got the offer of his life.
info: I have a few more clichés up my sleeve regarding the cute, nervous, underappreciated camp guards. I hope you enjoy ;)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Summer had something good about it, everything was bright and warm, the plants were blooming and, above all, there was ice cream in abundance for everyone, young and old alike, everyone liked it.
This also applied to the residents of the Summer Camp... well, at least that was the plan, to make homemade ice cream from berries and fruits.
A natural ice cream, as Jason had called it, but a glance at the twenty-year-old ice cream machine made the teenagers groan.
Holes and moldy were more the terms that described the once expensive machine, it was now nothing more than a nest for spiders and rats, but it wouldn't make ice cream.
So the idea had to be discarded and the kids were satisfied with lukewarm sliced watermelon and medium-cold water, which they took with them into the huts.
,,We'll wait outside in case you need us!” Jason had shouted, but by then they had already slammed the door in his face, leaving the two adults outside together alone.
It wasn't the first time that they had found themselves alone together out here; there were far too many days when the teenagers wanted to stay together as a group.
The two 'groups' rarely interacted, and when they did, it was only for dinner.
Which is why, especially in the last few days when the sun was particularly strong, the teenagers separated from the adults. Her gaze fell on him again, that confused, sweet expression on his face as he didn't quite know what to do.
Go inside and cool down?
Or follow the rules and just stay outside with her?
She took the question out of his hands as she disappeared towards the cabin ,,Whatever you do now, Jason, I'm going to get a towel and go for a swim!” she called to him before going up the wooden stairs to change in the cabin and get a few things.
The sun was shining down on the camp and the nearby lake, a large natural pool where, if you were lucky, you could catch a few small fish. But that wasn't why she was here.
Instead, she laid a towel on the wooden dock, put her things next to it, and took off her shorts and T-shirt to jump into the lake in her bikini.
The cool water was a welcome relief on her heated skin, letting herself glide like a starfish or pulling through the water like a frog was so much better than staying in the stuffy hut, the fans were just like everything else here and all that would happen is hot air.
She didn't see the person she had been watching for minutes, didn't see Jason walking along the meadow and the dock, watching her every swim and drift on the water.
How he tried not to look too obviously at her breasts or ass whenever she let herself drift or turned around, the light material of the fabric hiding her most intimate parts, and yet she was the most beautiful mermaid he had ever seen.
Not wanting to come across as a creepy horror movie character, he approached the dock a little closer and sat down next to her things. He tried to close his eyes and enjoy the sun, but his light eyes kept going back to her until she said, ,,Jason! So you took the right path,” and came back to the dock.
A few little moves of the cute frog until she came to him on the footbridge and sat down next to him, put her body on the towel and dried herself a little with it, ,,Yes-Yes, it seems so,” he replied, looking over the lake, into the distorted reflection, and saw her.
It was like being in a hall of mirrors where you saw everything about yourself, but not the real you, because you seemed to lose yourself in it too much.
The rustling of the towel drying and the soft sound of the drops dripping onto the wooden walkway was almost mechanical. ,,So quiet today? Hmmm, no lecture about insects or camp rules?” her question sounded almost disappointed as she lay down on the towel and enjoyed the sun a little.
Jason saw how the sun almost made the water droplets on her hat glisten, pretty, peaceful and definitely soft and warm. He was sure that she was warm and soft too; someone nice and pretty just had to be.
She was always too cheerful, didn't treat him like a weird settler like almost everyone else, and she had a good connection with the teenagers.
The minutes passed by but soon he saw her move again and reach into the small bag for the sunscreen. The tube showed orange and sun, not quite the picture she had here, but enough,
,,Jason darling... would you put sun cream on my back, please?” she asked, holding out the bottle to him.
A question that almost made him choke on his own spit, his hands on her, he would touch her, hold her and, above all, feel her.
The question was such a simple request, but his heart beat much too fast for it, ,,Sure! Sure, I'd love to... I'll do it,” he said hastily and much too loudly as he took the bottle and saw her unfasten the string of her bikini and lie back on the towel.
She closed her eyes and waited for him to touch her.
The click of the opening cap seemed like a bang, he tried to let the cool white cream flow into his hands, concentrating on her and not on his thoughts.
Thoughts that invaded his fantasies, fantasies that haunted him in his sleep or when daydreaming. ,,I-I'm starting,” he forced out, his throat much too dry and he almost flinched when she merely sighed a satisfied sound as his hands touched her back.
He suppressed a joyful thrill when he realized how soft and warm she was, how easily he could glide over her skin with the cream providing some relief.
He pampered the skin and the muscles underneath with a much-needed massage to better distribute the cream.
He thought he felt her heartbeat, calm and happy whenever he ran his hands over her shoulders, his cheeks burning as he ran further down and lightly touched her hip, only to quickly move back up again.
The thought of simply grabbing her like that was clear, but this 'dominance' was always transformed into his own submission.
He was not one of those soccer or sports fanatics who knew what they were doing; he was a nervous, friendly young man whose interests were perhaps a little unusual, but his love and lust were as normal as anyone else's.
But she, she seemed like a goddess he would have done anything to touch her and now he did it, massaged her and received a few gentle, pleasant sounds... a dream come true.
A dream that lasted only a few minutes but a dream he would store forever, or at least until tonight when he disappeared into the shower alone to get relief.
But all good things come to an end and when he had covered her entire back with cream, he said, ,,I'm done” and she uttered a moaning, ,,Thank you, Jason,” and gave him a grateful glance before dozing off again, seemingly at peace.
He would have stayed with her if he hadn't felt a slight twinge in his groin and didn't even have to look down to see what was happening to the bulge in his trousers.
More panicked than aroused, he fumbled around a bit nervously before just shouting, ,,I'm cooling down!” and jumping into the lake with his clothes on, the last thing he wanted was for her to think of him as a creepy loser just because he had touched a woman.
But when the water surrounded him, pleasantly cooling him, he didn't see the knowing smile that appeared on her lips as she looked at the merman, hoping that he would also let her get close to him.
The sun always had something good to offer, besides warmth and beauty, it especially brought people together.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
@imyprice , @alonsotrick , @xxxibgdrgons , @yearsbecomingcool , @starry-night-lover1 , @bruhlpng , @simonsrealwife , @myromanempire81
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majestyeverlasting · 2 days ago
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Hello! If you are willing I would like to request a Frankie morales x reader oneshot? 🙃🙃 im obsessed with Frankie x wife reader lately and I was thinking maybe you could write somethin where the reader is pregnant and having cramps / contractions while Frankie is out with his friends and calls him all freaked out but even though it’s just false labour he still rushes home anyway?🥰🥰
(I love your writing btw I hope you accept this request thank you <3)
𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐚𝐲 | 𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐬
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Pairing Frankie Morales x Female Reader
Summary A night of laughter, love, and quiet devotion reminds you and Frankie how much your world has grown—especially with your baby on the way.
A/N Thank you so much for this request and your patience, anon! This is my first time writing for Frankie, so let me know what you guys think. 
⠂⠁⠈⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂
Across the living room, the evening news drones so low, the TV might as well not be on at all. Ten minutes ago, Frankie left you alone on the couch to go get ready for a night out. You’d looked up from your book long enough to catch the wink he shot you before disappearing up the staircase.
As easy as it would be for him to stay in, you insisted he go out and enjoy himself. The two of you had finally settled into your new home. Soon enough, the guys were starting to rib him about falling off the face of the earth.
He's getting better at striking a balance these days. 
“Alright, hermosa,” he announces as he descends the stairs. “Here’s what I’m working with...” 
Frankie walks back into the living room in dark-wash jeans and a sage button down. As you set your book aside, he offers a goofy spin in a lighthearted mockery of what you oftentimes do. You try to restrain your smile, but it shines through anyways. Frankie grins like he’s won a prize, teeth glinting along with the sparkle in his dark eyes.
Everyone said he was trouble when you first met. It didn’t take long to realize they meant the intoxicating kind that disarms a room, draws people in, makes them feel seen. The kind you’d never recover from losing if you let slip away. 
A year ago, he got down on one knee and asked you for forever. That was the moment you realized that, in turn, you were the trouble he couldn’t bear to lose.  
Before you have the chance to stand, he stalks over to you and leans down to capture your lips in a brief, tender kiss. 
You smile when he pulls away to stand back up to his full height, all six feet and broad shoulders. Looking up at him from your seated position feels a little funny, but you can't bring yourself to mind. If for no other reason than the gentle way he pinches your upturned chin between his thumb and forefinger.
“Have fun,” you murmur as you blink up at him. 
“I will.”
“And be safe.”  
“Yes ma’am.” Frankie’s touch falls away, and you stand to wrap your arms around his neck.
You tuck your nose into his shirt as his strong arms encircle your waist. He smooths a large hand up your back before stilling at the nape of your neck to deliver a firm but gentle squeeze. As he starts to pull away, you slip your fingers into his hair to scratch his scalp with your nails. It’s been a while since his last haircut, and now the dark strands curl beneath his ears. 
Frankie hums a low note of satisfaction. “Not fair.” 
“Completely fair,” you lilt.
He chuckles and pulls back enough to meet your gaze. His eyes are soft as he says, “Should be back in a couple hours.” 
“I’ll wait up.”
"You don't have to," he says.
"Don't I always?"
He thinks back over the times he's gone out without you, and yeah. You always do.
•••
It's quiet when he arrives back home. 
He kicks his boots off at the door and notices a pink sticky note on the wall above the key holder. There's a smiley face and heart drawn on it along with "welcome back!!!" Frankie feels himself smiling as he plucks it off the wall and saunters further into the house. 
In the living room, one lamp remains on so he can navigate his way through the otherwise dark space. You've folded the throw blanket. Fluffed and arranged the pillows like you do every night before bed. It’s the little things like that, little signs of life, that he’ll never tire of coming back home to. 
When Frankie finally enters the bedroom, he sees your smile in the warm, dim lamplight. You're kneeling on the bed wearing the cutesy black pajama set he likes on you. A breathy chuckle escapes him as he takes you in before his eyes find yours. 
He plays off the warmth in his cheeks by holding up the sticky note you had left for him. 
You tilt your head with innocent, furrowed brows. “Where’d that come from?” 
“Beats me," he plays along as you slide off the bed. 
He sets the note on the dresser so he can rest his hands on your waist when you approach. The scent of vanilla evades his senses in the gentlest way. 
“Did you have fun?” It’s a genuine question, but his mind goes fuzzy when you smooth your hands from his stomach up to his pecs. 
With a distracted nod, his thumbs slip beneath your satin tank top to brush your skin. All he can think about is the gentleness of your touch. The way you begin to toy with the button at the top of his shirt without actually unbuttoning it. 
“But not too much fun, right?” you ask. “You’re not too tired, are you?” 
You finally pop the first button undone, then the next one, then the next. Revealing more and more of the dusting of hair across his tanned chest. 
Rather than answering, he scoops you over his shoulder as you squeak his name. 
Eight Months Later
It’s been a while since Frankie laughed this hard. When he’s finally on the verge of catching his breath, Santiago picks up from where Will left off in the story, and that pleasant side ache returns. If he weren't too busy swiping the tear from his eye, he reckons he’d see every head in the bar turned to gawk at the four cackling hyenas. A live country rock band plays as their soundtrack.
Luckily, that isn’t the case. Like them, everybody is lost in their own little worlds. With their own inside jokes and old stories that endure no matter how many times they're told. 
“And that’s what your ass gets for trying to show off,” Will concludes. It earns him a prompt elbow to the side from his younger brother, whose cheeks are either flushed from the whiskey or embarrassment. 
It had been the story about Benny getting told off by a group of older women during a group trip to Panama. Not in English, but in Spanish. The icing on the cake was that they had been pausing every few words so Santiago could translate for them in real time. 
As their amusement begins to settle, they look around at each other and shake their heads. It’s been too long since they’ve gotten together like this. Frankie takes a small swig from his beer and lets his head rest against the wall behind him. 
Under the dim lights, with drinks on the table, and surrounded by strangers, it feels as though no time has passed at all.  
Benny’s eyes rove over to the recreation room, where people shoot pool and throw darts. 
“I don’t know about y’all, but I’m ready to kick some ass in a game of 501,” he says. 
William folds his hands on the table. “We puttin' money up?”
“Hell yeah, we are,” Benny scoffs and pulls a face. “I’m leaving here with something.” 
“Twenty-five each and the winning team splits the pot?” Santiago proposes. “I call Fish on my team.” He gives Frankie's shoulder a squeeze.
Benny drums a beat on the table. “Let’s do it.” 
They’re in the middle of scooting past other patrons when Frankie’s phone begins buzzing in his pocket. He doesn’t expect to see a picture of your face light up the screen. Santiago is the only one in the group who notices. 
“Gotta take this,” Frankie tells him, and answers the call as he turns away. 
“Hang on one second, honey, I’m getting someplace quiet.” 
To make it to the front of the establishment, he shuffles between a small sea of tables filled with people with loose smiles and glowy faces. He holds the door open for a group of young ladies filing inside, which earns him a series of chirpy thank-yous. The giddy energy of the night fades once he’s outside, as if it was all stuffed within the walls of Dave's Bar and Grill. With the patio being around back, only a few people stand smoking out front. 
The air is warm. A couple of the parking lot lights flicker. Frankie heads toward one of the benches as he says, “Alright, sweetheart, I’m here.”
A heavy breath is the first thing that greets him from the other end of the line. 
“Frankie,” your voice is shaky, and his brow furrows as he takes a seat. 
“Talk to me,” he coaxes, his voice even softer. 
“I’m cramping pretty bad right now.” You take another deep breath. “I think it’s the Braxton Hicks the nurse was telling us about. They’re finally happening.” 
He stands from the bench and begins pacing along the curb. “You sure they're the false ones?” he asks. “You know you’re body better than anybody else…” 
“I’m ninety-nine percent sure.” Another sharp ache pulses low in your stomach, and makes you bite back a small whine. 
Frankie releases his lower lip from between his teeth as guilt tugs at his chest. “Go lay down, okay?” he says as he fishes his truck keys out of his pocket. “Or run yourself a bath if you can manage. Nurse said that’s supposed to help.” 
Shuffling arises on your end. “Okay,” you murmur.
“I’m on my way.” 
Tonight, you can’t muster the willpower to tell him to stay out with his friends. Ever since you hit the thirty-four-week mark, you’ve been hyper-aware of every pang, flutter, and gurgle. Even if you were the one feeling the heat, it was easier to walk through the flames with him. 
“Drive safe, okay?” you say. “Go the speed limit.” 
“I’m always safe.” It’s a white lie, but he was getting much better. Especially now that he was about to have two people looking forward to him arriving home in one piece at the end of the day. 
Life is a delicate, fragile, remarkable thing. It’s a fact that solidified all the more the first time you showed him a black-and-white ultrasound and pointed out your little girl. 
“I’ll be there soon,” he promises. 
Santiago steps outside as he's hanging up, immediately scoping out Frankie. 
“Everything alright, man?” He searches Frankie’s gaze. He’s always analyzing and piecing together. People, places, things. Frankie doesn’t have to say anything. “Your wife and baby okay?” 
Frankie nods, but there’s worry etched across his face. “Gonna head home to be on the safe side.”  
“I’ll let the guys know.” Santiago pulls Frankie into a hug and gives him a few pats on the back. “It was good seeing you tonight.” 
“Likewise.”
“Guess it’ll have to be a playdate next time,” Santiago teases. 
Frankie cracks a smile. 
•••
With the bathroom door cracked, you can hear the familiar shuffling of Frankie entering the house. His keys clink into the bowl shortly before the steps begin to creak under his weight. One purposeful footstep after the next, until he’s filling the doorway with a hand on his hip. But you sit in the bathtub with your eyes closed and your head tipped back. The subtle scent of lavender fills the humid air. You’re only visible from your collarbones up, and your pregnant stomach rises above the bubbly water. 
Rather than speaking, he stands there and takes you in with those soft, dark eyes. You’re beautiful where you lay. His gaze is palpable, and opening your eyes to meet it solidifies for him that you’re okay. It's a silent assurance. These moments when you don't need words have only grown in number. Every trace of worry that once existed has dwindled away.
As he takes a small step inside, he tosses his baseball cap onto the sink counter and runs a hand through his hair. Tension melts from his shoulders in real time. Makes him look even taller where he stands.  
“Hey,” he breathes.
“Hi,” you say, then note, "Your shoes."
The teasing undertone to your words makes him chuckle. At himself, at the fact that he’d rushed home, despite your warning, with a head full of clamoring thoughts. Thoughts of arriving to you in labor and having to deliver his own child. Or packing you into his truck and needing to pull over and do the very same. There was no middle ground.
He’d dedicated years of his life to working under the most intense pressure, but it was his pregnant wife who’d finally thrown that composure off course.  
Yet here you were pointing out the fact that he had tracked his shoes upstairs.
Frankie crouches to untie his boots before kicking them off his feet. He stumbles in the process and has to brace himself on the sink. The smile already budding on your face blooms into a fuller one when he huffs and peeks over at you. When you straighten up, the water sloshes and reveals more of you chest. 
A long sigh escapes him as he sits alongside the tub and stretches his long legs out in front of him. That’s when a laugh bubbles up your throat. Despite his best efforts to retrain his own amusement, he can’t help but join in. The two of you sit there laughing in a mix of relief and acceptance of the fact that your worlds have only just begun to change. 
A comfortable silence soon settles in the space between you. Frankie gets an almost wistful look about him as he stares straight ahead. 
“What are you thinking about?” you ask after a while. 
He rests his arm on the side of the tub. “Us,” he answers. “Being parents.”  
There’s an understated sense of anticipation in his tone that he still hasn’t been able to put into words. A small hint of apprehension lingers too, but the type that propels as opposed to paralyzes. 
You hum as you run a wet hand over your glistening stomach. 
“I love you,” he continues softly. “I love her.”
He reaches out to splay his large hand over your stomach. You smile as he continues talking, “Love that I get to do this with you.” 
Fondness swells in your chest all the more. Like a third lung set on sustaining you too. 
“I’d kiss you right now, but I don’t know how,” you admit. 
Without hesitating, Frankie shifts so he’s able to steady your chin and press his lips to yours. You lift a hand to rest the tips of your fingers against his scruffy cheek. Frankie hums when you ghost your tongue along his lower lip, only to pull away like you have something to say. Before you can speak, he presses back in for one more soft peck, then touches his forehead to yours. 
You feel yourself smiling. “What I was trying to say,” you start, but Frankie kisses you again because you’re right there, and because he can.
Butterflies erupt all throughout your stomach. 
“Go ahead,” he finally coaxes with a small smile, lips brushing yours. “What were you gonna say, hermosa?” There’s a gruff, honeyed quality to his voice that you’re certain is intentional. 
“That I love you too,” you whisper. 
-
Thanks for reading! Likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated. I promise I see them all! 
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ameliathornromance · 2 days ago
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The Other Woman - Final Part
A/N: Here’s part three! I know you guys wanted to know what happened to the Guard’s wife so here it is; This will also be the last part I do for this series as I’ve got a ton of other ideas and I’d like to work on those as well. Anyway, enjoy the last part!
Since you’d left the Palace in the Human populated area, time went by in a whirlwind.
Your wedding with the Lord had happened quickly after leaving and was one of the prettiest events the whole forest – and some humans – had ever seen.
The Fae Lord had been delighted to invite and meet the rest of your family. He and your father seemed to get along swimmingly already, and greeted each other like they were old friends when your families carriage arrived in the forest.
Later that evening, after catching up with your family and entertaining them the whole day, you had asked the Fae Lord something that had been on your mind for the day, “how and when did you meet my father?”
It had evaded you how he had asked your father for your hand, and it hadn’t occurred to you to ask your Fiance until today.
The Fae Lord gave his signature grin as he raised a tea cup to his lips, “I actually met him the night I said I wanted to help you.” He explained, “your father was in a pub and I had snuck out to go and do some late night drinking. He was there and we just hit it off.” The Lord set his cup down on its saucer and frowned. “Although, it wasn’t until the next morning that I actually found out he was your father, and then had to work on my image before I asked him for your hand.”
You snorted, “yeah something tells me he wouldn’t have been happy about a drunken Fae asking for my hand in marriage after you’d been out with him the previous night.”
Soon, your wares and personal items began to arrive from the Palace and amongst them, were all the presents that the King’s Guard had gifted you. They had been thrown into one of your many jewellery boxes, the necklaces tangled together with the many bracelets that the Orc had gifted you.
They felt dirty, wrong to even look at now, felt tarnished and rusted with sin as you ran your thumb over the smooth gold.
Of course, you wouldn’t dream of wearing them, but you also couldn’t stand to just throw them away. Many other people who were less fortunate than you could benefit from the money that these items cost… but the thought of giving the people evidence of adultery filled you with dread, made your stomach churn with anxiety.
You explained your complicated feelings to your fiance one morning at breakfast.
He listened intently, before suggesting, “why don’t you send them to King’s Guards’ wife?”
Your blood turned cold at the thought. “Isn’t that a bit… callous?” You asked. “For her I mean. She’s probably had the baby now, and isn’t in much of a situation to leave him if she wanted… That and then everyone would know what happened between me and her husband.”
“Not necessarily.” Your fiance said, raising a finger. He leaned his elbows on the breakfast table and pointed at you, “it doesn’t have to be done in bad taste. If you send her the jewellery and offer her a position here, with better pay and better accommodation, she may just come here and decide to work for us.”
“But what if she’s angry with me?” You asked, worriedly. “That would be such an insult to her! I don’t want to do anything to make her even more angry than she would already be with me.”
The Fae Lord pursed his lips, furrowing his eyebrows. “You didn’t know he was married did you?” He asked you.
“No, of course not!”
“And you stopped the affair after you found out, didn’t you?”
“Yes, but that doesn’t change the fact that I did it!” You groaned.
The Fae took your hand in his, “look, you can’t control her reaction,” he said, plainly. “But, what you can do, is offer her compensation for the emotional damage she would feel from finding out. That’s why you would be offering her the job. She would be moved away from her husband, she gets better pay than she did at the Palace and her child gets to grow up in a place surrounded by greenery.” He gestured to the castle around him.
You stared at the polished wooden table in front of you. “But… what if she tells everyone that I had an affair with him?” You whispered. “I’d be ruined, and then we wouldn’t be able to marry, and then there’s my parents-”
“It would look worse on her.” The Lord said, “Of course, it’s bad that her husband had the affair, but she would be looked down on as an Orc, for trying to slander a person of the aristocracy.” He gave you a reassuring smile. “And I’ll be here to protect you, won’t I? I’ll make sure none of that does anything to stop us from being together. I promise.”
Now that you had gained some distance from the Palace you had contemplated on confessing everything to the Orc’s wife. She didn’t deserve to be stuck in that kind of situation, after all, it’s not like she did anything to warrant such an awful partner.
And so, with shaking hands and a clumsily written letter, you sent off the jewellery to the Palace and to the Orc’s wife.
The weeks after it had been sent off were like waiting on a jury verdict. Every morning you awoke in your bedroom, you expected the Fae servants attending you, to give you dirty looks or treat you coldly, as the news of you being a homewrecker, had spread through out the Kingdom and Forest.
And every morning, when that didn’t happen, you couldn’t help but sigh with relief – prompting some very concerned questions from your attendants.
You did your best to explain in the letter what had actually happened between you and the King’s Guard, and only hoped that his wife would be understanding.
You didn’t expect to be forgiven, but for her to understand would be more than enough.
What you didn’t expect however, was in the mid-afternoon when you were going over some favour colour choices for your wedding, that a Fae woman would burst into your office, panting. “Orc- woman-” she breathed, “demands to see- my Lady-”
You’d never abandoned an activity faster. Shoeing away the woman who’d brought you the favour colours, you asked the Fae, “where? Where is she?”
The Fae hoarsed out something about the Orc woman being in the gardens.
You practically dashed through the halls, leaving your own servants and the dignified stride of a Lady behind as you rushed for the gardens.
Finally, you reached the garden doors. They were tall, beautiful things, made of hard oak wood and harden sap panels for windows that swirled and curled, obscuring anyone from peering into the gardens.
As you reached for the twig door handles, you stopped just short of them.
Did you really want to see this Orc? Who was probably so angry with you, she might bite your head off?
It’s not like you could turn back now, after all, she’s right behind those crystal doors in front of you.
Sucking in a deep breath, you flung the doors open and stepped outside into the gardens.
You didn’t have to go far to find her.
The Orc Lady who you had seen in the kitchens, time and time again, with her kind smile and kind tone, was gone.
Instead, the Orc Lady stood with a suitcase in hand, a baby glued to her chest with a fabric cloth. The infant slept soundly, without any kind of inclination of what was going on.
Your stomach twisted as you recognised some of King’s Guards’ features on its face.
After a moment of silence, the Orc snarled at you. “Is it really true?” Her voice was as deep as thunder, full of murderous intent.
Pursing your lips, you lowered your head. There wasn’t anything that you could say or do to make this any better.
When you were thinking through your revenge plans, you truly had no idea whether or not you ought to tell the Guards wife. She was already going to be under enough stress as it was, seeing as she had to give birth to a baby in – what you judged to be at the time – a few weeks.
Adding a cheating husband to the mix, you determined, would do nothing to help her out.
When you said nothing, the Orc threw her suitcase at your feet. The jewellery you sent her exploded out of the case, scattered across the grass at your feet. “And you didn’t think to tell me!?” She shouted.
You kept quiet, staring at the collection of gold and silver at your feet.
“How dare you keep this from me!” She bellowed, “what did I do to deserve that being kept from me?! Did I wrong you in some way, (Y/N)?!”
Swallowing hard, you raised your head to look at her. “No.” You said, bravely. “You didn’t do anything… I was trying to think of your baby and your wellbeing-”
“And taking care of my wellbeing is keeping quiet about my cheating son of a bitch husband!?” She bellowed. She pointed a thick green finger at you, “that is not your decision to make!” She hissed.
“Well what was I supposed to do?!” You retorted. Kicking away the valuables, you approached her, “it’s not like I could out him for what he was! That would have ruined everything for me and you too! How would I know you wouldn’t do the same thing to me!?”
“Because I thought we were friends!” She snapped back.
You recoiled at her words. Friends?
The Orc’s chest heaved up and down as she rubbed her face, “I know that we weren’t exactly the closest of people,” she said, “but you were the only one who would come to the kitchens to purposefully see me. I liked having you around, (Y/N) and it broke my heart when… when he said I couldn’t tell anyone I was pregnant.” Taking her hands away from her face, she wiped her nose. “So I couldn’t see you anymore, or tell you. And I know that you didn’t know I was married, I can forgive you for that… but when you did find out, not telling me about any of it?” Tears welled up in her eyes. “And only getting that package and letter? It just…” She covered her mouth and looked away from you.
You stopped halfway over to her. You opened your mouth, wanting to say something comforting, supportive. But any kind of words like that died in your throat.
“I… I’m sorry.” you settled on finally. “I shouldn’t have treated you like that. I should have been up front and honest with you and shouldn’t have kept that from you.” For the first time since meeting your fiance, you cursed him.
You were right to think that his idea was cold. You continued your approach and placed a hand on the Orcs shoulder, “I know I can’t do anything to fix what I’ve done or change the past of what I did. But I can try and help you now and in the future.”
The Orc looked at you, her eyes bloodshot and still swimming with tears.
“Don’t feel like you have to take the job if you don’t want it,” you said, honestly. “If you don’t want it, I’ll be happy to do anything else to compensate what you lost – Hell, I’ll even find you a better husband if you wish.”
“I never said I wasn’t taking the job.” The Orc Lady said, quickly. She turned back around to face you. She wiped her fingers across her cheeks, drying up her stray tears and then cleared her throat. “But, if I’m going to work here, I want higher pay and more time off so I can spend it with my son.”
“Higher than I already offered?” You asked, slightly offended. What you originally offered was way higher than what the Palace was offering her, at least three times the pay. And now she wants more?
The Orc Lady crossed her arms, just in front of her baby and narrowed her eyes at you.
Sighing, you lamented, “okay, okay. Higher pay then.” You supposed that she had a right to demand more of you, especially after your affair.
She gave you a weary smile at you. “Thank you my Lady.” She pursed her lips, “and… thank you for finally telling me about what happened.”
The position you’d offered your ex’s wife, was kitchen work, but this time, she was head of it. Her son – whom she had decided to name Cogak – was a bright baby, even just fresh out of the womb.
You arranged for him to have his own nanny so his mother could work without worrying about him.
The friendship you’d had with the Orc Lady wouldn’t be like it was before, but your trying to make things better, was a start.
The Fae Lord had smiled one evening as the pair of you decided on what flowers would be at your wedding venue. “I never expected an Orcling to be so intelligent.”
“Well, he is getting a noble child’s education.” You explained. “Apparently, he’s already doing better than most children his age. And that’s comparing him to the other Fae.”
The Fae chuckled as he examined a bouquet of blue orchids. “What about these for the reception?”
“What’s your suit colour?” You asked, quickly.
As if your fiance was himself a bride, he’d been very closed about what kind of suit he would be wearing to your wedding.
One time, you’d walked into his office and he squealed, and threw himself on top of the sketches his designer had come up for him, like he was a maiden who’d been walked in on while getting changed.
His closed off nature about it, only made you even more curious.
“If you think you’re going to get that out of me that easily, then I’d say this marriage isn’t going to last long, my darling.” The Fae Lord smirked as he ran his thumb over the petals of the flower.
“Patiences is a virtue. You don’t see me trying to peek at your wedding dress, do you?” He smirked, slyly. “I know it’s a human tradition, but why can’t I follow it too?”
He was right of course, he’d been incredibly respectful about your wedding dress and preferences when it came it. He was also very generous, giving you a large sum of gold to actually buy said wedding dress, “all I want is for you to be happy!” he’d said as he’d handed, three, four, five, six pouches of gold into the dressmakers hands.
The Fae Lord had given you a smile and whispered to you as he left the room, “let’s make our wedding the topic of the century!”
Although you chuckled at his words, you didn’t want to outshine the King and Queen. It would be an insult to the both of them, given that the Queen had been the one who had allowed you to become her Lady in Waiting. Without her, you wouldn’t have met the Fae Lord.
So, you decided to keep your dress modest, but elegant. It followed the traditional white, but had elements of the Fae world you would be marrying into. Little details of moss, spider web glittering on the train of your dress, while you had a golden, wreath as your tiara.
On the day of the wedding everything went smoothly.
As you started your walk down the aisle – with your father at your side, “I’m very happy you caught the eye of this Fae fellow, he’s a good time.” He had whispered as you prepared for your walk – you caught sight of your family crying tears of joy.
Your Fiance, at the other end of the aisle, seemed to outshine you as the bride.
His suit was quite the marvel, and you now understood why he didn’t want you to see it.
The dark red fabric accompanied by a rose petal cloak, contrasted with his white hair, that fell down his back, and over his shoulders like sheets of snow; He looked incredible.
After vows – with many tears – and the sealing of your union with a kiss, the whole room erupted with cheers and claps.
The reception afterwards was beautifully bright and colourful, with Fae and Humans dancing together as you and your husband sat and watched from behind the head table.
The Orc Lady’s son – who had grown surprisingly fast – was happy to be there, surrounded by people who doted on him as if he was the main celebrant of the reception.
Your Fae Lord Husband didn’t leave your side the whole night, dancing with you and bringing back the memories of when you first properly met.
The days following were hazy. You seemed to be barely lucid in that time, thanks to all the alcohol present, alongside your husband who – you had found out that night – was a clingy, emotional drunk.
“At first,” he had slurred at the reception, “I was a little worried about asking you, like,” he stared at you, his huge black eyes consuming your gaze. “You’re so beautiful and, I’m just some mud Fae,” he gestured to himself. “Who am I to ask someone like you to dance?”
You had rolled your eyes and pulled him into your arms, silencing his self-deprecating words. “No, don’t say that.” You had slurred back, “I’d have accepted even if you were a toad!”
But once the drunkenness had cleared, you’d found that you were feeling a lot more sickly than usual.
At first, you thought it was just the remainder of the alcohol finding it’s way out of your system. But when it didn’t go away after a month, you went to go and seek a physician.
And after a few tests, she confirmed to you what you had suspected: you were pregnant.
The Fae Lord was over the moon when he found out and excitedly told anyone who would listen about your pregnancy.
And now in the present, as you watched your husband natter to anyone who would listen about the names he’d thought of for your baby, you realised that you had never felt more content.
This was better than any fairy tale or romance novel that you’d ever read.
You occasionally thought about the King’s Guard, and how he was doing. But that never lasted long, as you were often pulled back into the present moment by your husband.
Who loved and cherished you more than that Orc ever could.
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