#but it rubs me wrong to have countless photos of someone you know personally hanging up

[thek1ngtalks]

Marinette being adopted by Bruce Wayne and then dating like Tim or Damian is highkey giving Y/N vibes in the worst way possible

[sunset-novice-writer]

Pinky Promises |Bakugou Katsuki x Reader|

Hey guys, the long-awaited PInky Promises Part Two. It’s finally out guys, not going to lie this is long. I think I will cut back on this, possibly to make it part four. Despite it being a bit of a wait, I hope you all enjoy this! 

Taglist: @blackgirlanimes​ @songbird-writer​ @rattycakes263​ @lady-bakuhoe

Without anymore delay from me. Here is the Part Two of PP!

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Departure & Promises

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 Frustrated,  Katsuki released another displeased growl as he paced back and forth in his room. He wanted to talk to you outside your house that night, but he heard your sobs. The sound cleaved him in two, guilt seeping into his very soul.  Deep down in his mind, he could move toward you to apologize, but he hated that it engraved his stubbornness into his very being. He knew that it would be easy to say those two brief words that would make this all better, but his pride and stubbornness would only end up botching them. 

However, the teen didn’t have a lot of time to mull over things. He wanted to convey to you how he really felt,  because today was the day you’d be leaving for an entire year.  

Why did it have to be so long, anyway? How could your parents just dump you like that and not care?  

Only silence answered his questions, making him feel more irritated further than he already felt did before. Your actual parents didn’t have any sense for giving you up. Katsuki thrusted his fist out to relieve his anger that seemed reasonable at the moment.

To him, you were his own walking, talking source of happiness, your smile erasing all of his anger and woes. It saddened him to think about your goofy ass smile disappearing for a long time, leaving him with nothing but a space in his chest. It made him want to seek you out, to just hold on to you and engrave the look of your smile and what it made him feel into his bones. 

Now, that very smile -the one that soaked his dreams in honeyed delight when his nightmares threatened his mind. You might get swept off of your feet by some shitty extra.No one was worthy of something so special except for  Bakugou himself.. It left a bitterness swell inside his chest. Countless shitty ‘what ifs’ piled up inside of his mind, causing him to stop his pacing. 

“Arrgghh! Screw  this shit!” He cursed. Why was he letting these weak thoughts run rampant in his mind? Weakness was the one thing he didn’t stand for in his life, so why was he letting it consume him now? Bakugou knew exactly what he wanted from life; to chase after his goals, to beat all of life’s challenges, and to find a partner tray would accept him and treat him as their equal — which was you. 

 Then thinking about the hurt expression on your features when he said those stupid words to you, it made him realize that he didn’t deserve you. All his bravado made him pause, closing his eyes to calm himself, wondering why he didn't say something in that moment. 

He never admitted openly whenever he did something wrong—He brushed under the rug while a threat dared anyone to mention it. Instead, with you he didn’t mind if you expressed your anger at  him. You just walked away from him instead of saying something which unnerved him to no end. It made things feel all that heavier for Bakugou, like he realized. That this would be his last chance to tell you how he felt. All that he wanted to express did not match up because he lashed out instead.

Yes, he could admit it damn Deku for getting in his head space. He wasn’t man enough to at least  say that he was in the wrong, even if it was directly to a person's face. Katsuki glanced at the photo he kept on his dresser with you in it. A goofy ass smiling lifted your lips upward hugging him close to you, yet he hated how he got so flustered that day.

Still, he couldn’t help it; you were just too damn soft for your own good and that perfume that suited you only added to the problem. “Damn it, I  just wished I could take back what I said to her.” Bakugou huffed to himself. He pulled out his phone to glance at the screen, checking for any messages from you. To his surprise that was not a single text, or missed call appeared on the screen of his phone from you. 

Should I really text her something? No, I can’t do that! I have to say it in person…

He gripped his hair in annoyance, letting out another huff with a scowl shaping on his lips. No, that would be useless. He needed some way to make this up to  [Y/n], not a text message when he  messed up so bad. You probably thought he would not show up to say goodbye given how cold he’d been. It was a fair point to make. Now he had to listen to that damn  Deku lecture him about how he wasn’t being considerate.

That’s the last person he wanted to give him to give his fuckin’ two cents. While Katsuki got involved deeply in his thoughts someone came into his room announcing themselves. 

“Hey, Bakubro!” A voice called out cheerfully, causing  Katsuki to narrow his scarlet eyes into a glare, not happy about the intrusion. Why did that hag let that shitty hair come in? He wasn’t in the mood to see anyone at the moment he groaned; he didn’t want to hear his loud ass voice right now.

“Shut up, idiot!” Katsuki growled, his hand coming down in a karate chop on Kirishima’s head.A yowl in pain escaped Eijirou who came to bring his hand to rub the bump on his head. 

He winced, rubbing his bump, glanced at the blonde giving a sigh himself.” Geez, I was coming by to see how you doing Bakugou. Why did ya have to hit so hard,  man?”

Ignoring the shitty hair, he did not have time to hang out with this dumbass he needed to figure out how to clear things up with [Y/n]. “Bakugou, you need to man up, like seriously.” Eijirou’s brow knitted in a frown, his voice filled with concern for his best friend who’s glare deepened in his direction.

“Dumbass! I don’t need your help.” Katsuki's eyes flashed in defiance, his tone furious  mixed with an unfurling, unrelenting stare demanding he didn’t continue. His worrisome opinion wasn’t he wanted because this was something he needed to fix himself. 

“What good is lying to yourself man…” Kirishima shook his head in disappointment, he placed a hand on his shoulder turning him around to face him. In reply, Katsuki smacked his hand away from his shoulder, hating that even this goofy idiot was using his brain.  An idiot giving him advice that was sound, though where had this Eijirou been all the time they were in school-maybe he was just having a moment.

“I know my [Y/n] wants to see you before she leaves.” he stated truthfully, he visited you along with Deku and the others just as your family was getting ready to depart. Your eyes looked so sad that you didn’t see Kastuki there among everyone. Kirishima gave him a hard look when he scoffed at his answer to [Y/n], but not that hard to tell he liked her by the light flush on his cheeks.

“It’s none of your business Kirishima.” Bakugou scowled, he wanted to see you though that sad expression clenched at his heart, as he stopped for a minute his eyes widening for a second.  Your flight  didn’t  leave for another hour, wasn’t it? He hoped that you weren’t preparing to head off early, not yet he needed to see you.

“I thought she wasn’t taking an early flight?!” he shouted at him. Eijirou eyes widened in surprise to see Bakugou’s shocked expression, and another string of curses escaped his mouth. Nothing would keep him from seeing his dumbass, not mention were you down in the dumps by what he said. You left early because of what he said to you. A thought unnerved him, making Katsuki wonder if you would even come back.

“Shitty hair we are taking your car to the airport.” He pulled Kirishima by the collar of his shirt, dragging him out of his room hurriedly. Damn him if you left without listening to what he needed to tell you. At least he would tell you what he needed to last night from the argument that transpired between you.

“All right, all right, Bakugou!” Kirishima chuckled at his friend, as he grinned a little feeling it was about time he faced up to his manly feelings. [Y/n] would be in for one heck of surprise, though he hoped you both stopped dancing around each other.

“Stop grinning, dumbass!” Katsuki glanced at the redhead with a goofy-looking grin on his face.Kirishima just grinned wider causing the blonde to roll his eyes at the antics he was displaying. 

“Manly displays of admittance ain’t shameful-” Kirishima started, his eyes gleaming with admiration. He got a fist hitting him in the head. One thing was for sure, he wanted to make it before he lived with regret--regrets were something Bakugou Katsuki would never be subjected too.

He’d be damned if you left without hearing what he needed to tell you.Katsuki never could face the denial of his feelings for you, not wanting emotions to impede his own goals.

Katsuki was in love with [Y/n]. He just hoped he wasn’t too late to tell you his genuine feelings; his time was slipping through his fingers. The seconds were slipping away so he couldn’t waste time.

Just wait for me [Y/n]... I’m not letting you leave so soon, dumbass.

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A grand farewell party memorable send off with your friend’s is something you wouldn’t forget.[Y/n]  headed out for America to meet her biological parents. You knew that your hope in thinking Bakugou would be there made you hopeful. No one had heard from the explosive blond at all as most of his friends tried to reach out. It still made you feel like nothing until you got that stone wall of his stubbornness to see sense. You maneuvered through the crowds that filled the pack airport your parents walked with you. 

While your parents went to get the tickets together you set your gaze toward the enormous glass windows.  The morning had already ended to cascade a beautiful sunset across the sky that was a spectacular view for you. A stunning view that didn’t uplift your mood..At least you would have your memories of this place  with all your friends, though something deep down inside you couldn’t left of being unfilled.  A few moments away from going across the world to meet people you barely knew.

I should be excited to do this, but how come I can’t stop thinking of Katsuki?

That was  the most prominent that he would not show up. It’s not like you needed to dwell on the possible because when your friend wanted to be stubborn, that was it.You spent a few moments shifting through music between text messages from your friends.. They wanted to see how you were doing while you waited to board your flight, and you always found the group chats to be full of interesting banter.  You were currently in one right now with Izuku, Mina, Ochako, and Denki. 

They had been trying to cheer you up since Katsuki was a no show at your farewell   party.You were currently reading the first few messages that appeared in the chat, as you seemed to miss  some of the conversation that transpired. Apparently, there was a lot you were missing  about the conversation, so you read through the group chat. At least this would keep you entertained while your eyes scrolled through the conversation.

Acid Queen:

I can’t believe Bakugou! He should have at least came to say goodbye to [Y/n].

Green bean:

I know Ashido… -_-; Kacchan has always been stubborn, and I’ve got a pretty good hunch he’s at home angry at himself.. 

You weren’t really trying to think about Katsuki at the moment though in the beginning the conversation seemed to start that way. Your eyes drifted toward though Ochako’s comment made you interested to know what she was talking about.

Gravity-Hime

I think it’s obvious why Bakugou’s like that. ^-^ I’m surprised no  one has really figured it out yet.  But, I can’t really talk.heehee

Frogger Girl:

Like how you have a crush on someone in this cha--”

Gravity-Hime;

Tsuyu, shh! It’s a secret this not the chat for that >/////<

Greenbean:

Wait a minute...crush? Who is it---

Acid Queen:

Let’s get back on topic guys! Back to our Atomic tempered friend here.

Pika-Thunder:

Aw, now I wanted to know what that was about.  What a way to ruin the fun Mina. v-v

Acid Queen:

Shut up, Kaminari! 

This is not the time. We got more important matters to discuss.

Like how to get him too--Oh, shit!

The conversation was becoming entertaining for you to read you found your curiosity peaked. What had  they learned about Bakugou, which you didn’t already know? You hoped to learn about the topic further until Mina’s outburst led to the reason for the name that entered the chat. It made you understand the cause for concern which everyone was scrambling to typing fast.

Explosive King and Rockin’ Riot have entered the chat.

You clung to your phone staring at the screen debating whether you should watch what he says. Or let your nerves take over to just close the screen out altogether? Screw it, you went with the latter to read the comments since Katsuki joined the chat.

Explosive King:

What are you shitty dumbasses talkin’ about?

Green Bean:

W-what a surprise Kacchan..um how’s it going?

Pika-Thunder:

Hey Bakubro!

You missed the party with [Y/n]! It was so much fun, man.

Acid Queen:

Hey, Bakugou, Kirishima! It’s about time you guys showed up!

Explosive King: 

Stop calling me that,idiot!

Damn, Deku.

Rockin Riot:

Were a little busy guys!

Our Bakugou has finally man’d up another level--

Explosive King:

Shitty hair! Stop. Fuckin. Talkin. 

You wondered what they were busy with at that moment you noticed Bakugou exit the chat. Your eyes scanned with the comments from Mina, and the others wondering what Kirishima would say next. Since the blonde was no longer in the group chat—he probably was reading the conversation before he arrived. You got interrupted before you could read the message that got sent in the group.  A sudden grasp on your shoulder startled you out from the beeps and the buzzes of the chat notifications.

“[Y/n], it’s time to go sweetheart,”she smiled at you softly in return and you gave a bit of a sigh. You stood up to follow her toward the gate while slinging the strap of your backpack over your shoulder. Heading your way to the line filled with more people that planned to take the same flight, you spotted your Dad saving the both of you a spot in line.’It will be quite a while before I see this place again.’ Your thoughts dampened a little walking alongside your mother until you both were next to your Dad.

Your father ruffled your hair a little, giving you a reassured grin trying to lift your spirits.  “Don’t worry [Y/n],”his voice cheerful, wanting you to think about the positive.” It will only be for a year. Who knows? Maybe Katsuki will be here when we come back.”

Shaking your head with a laugh, you gave an amused smile at your father. “Maybe you’re right? Somehow I wonder if I would rather get pranked first, old man.” You said sarcastically, you  still hope that maybe you’ve got the outcome you wanted. The line moved once more, turning your eyes back forward, getting lost in your thoughts again. Once you got on that plane you would be too far away to face Katsuki--he seemed too busy to bother to call you. 

Perhaps, thinking it sounded better to not stress over someone who you never understood, or you thought you had a good grasp on your entire life.What you could not fathom was a loud young man’s voice screaming through the airport.

“Dumbass!!,”You knew that loud gruff voice anywhere, your eyes widened in surprise.

Everyone in line at the terminal jumped a little at the outburst while you were too busy trying to find Katsuki, he was the only one who’s voice could command that level of volume. Deep down, you wondered if it was him though another part of you sounded like an idiot for doubting that much.

“I know you can hear me, [Y/n]!”he called out once more while sending a few curses along his way in the crowd.”Move out of my way you shitty extras!”

Yup, that indeed was your Bakugou all right you tried to blink back tears that wet your eyes. Before your parents could stop you your feet moved on their own accord, making your way through the line to get to him. You wanted to see him. You darted out from under the rope barrier following the sound of his voice. he sounded far away. If he kept on shouting like he had been you would be there in no time.You felt your heart thud wildly in your chest in excitement filled with an eagerness to see those sharp scarlet eyes, you’ve missed. Your feet started moving once again moving toward the middle of the spacious area shifting your eyes to dart around the airport.

You wondered just how far Bakugou was from you moving your gaze to take a gander around the area. In hopes you find him when you didn’t you picked  up your feet to run once again bobbing and weaving through passerby's. While on the occasions giving short and quick apologies when you bumped into someone. A shuffle in the crowd broke apart a little at a time, making you catch a fraction flash of ash blonde hair.

You panted a bit out of breath from your sprint standing for a moment. While your lungs regained some oxygen lost.You walked closer while the crowd parted for the snarling angrily at the people who got in his way.

“If you don’t get out of my way .I’ll blow--” You felt nervous at those words Katsuki uttered. The last thing you wanted was airport security to drag him off. For his outburst threating to blow someone up. Nothing would impede you seeing him, so you thought about going with expressing your genuine feelings.

“Katsuki, I love you!” you confessed rather loudly. A blushed stained your cheeks with eyes staring at you, not at all missing the choke sputter that left Bakugou’s mouth. Things happened slowly around you both while the crowd around you naturally parted a path way for you to see each other.

That’s when you saw Katsuki not too far away from you to finally lay your eyes on bright red eyes. The pink flush touching his cheeks due to your expression laid vividly on his face with Kirishima grinning like an idiot. You noticing him walking toward you wearing a scowl on his face. You caught him staring at you which you moved to walk forward until you both stood in front of each other.

“Bakugou, I--”You started to say though you got cut off quickly by him.

“Idiot, I heard you already.”He hushed you his face still sporting a blush he grabbed your hand he added on.”If you’re gonna confess like that, use my first name then, [Y/n]”

He glared at you though you noticed it was softer than his usual ones.Katsuki sent Kirishima look telling him to go do something else.The redhead waved to you both before giving a thumbs up to his friend. You smiled giving him a nod, you wanted to ask him what he was doing here. A good hunch made you think better on asking him that instead waited for him to speak. 

He sighed deeply to himself running his free through his hair. Giving a glare to the noisy onlookers who abruptly shifted their gazes away from you both. 

“Look, I didn’t want you to leave without apologizin’“He admitted. You noticed that he stared back at you.His hand squeezing your own.”I realized I was a dumbass.”He begrudingly stated hating that he called himself an idiot. 

You let a amused smirk touch your lips.” Pretty much, yeah.”

Katsuki scowled at you giving you a warning,”Don’t get cocky! This is a one time thing, princess.”

You shook your head at him of couse he was bound to sound overconfident. Hey, that’s what you loved about him.”Yes, sir.” You saluted him, your voice holding a tiny bit of sacrasm though it was playfully.

“[Y/n]..”You looked at him stopping  your little teasing. When his voice turned serious all of a sudden.His hand jerked you a little closer to him where you felt his breath brush against your lips. It was his turned to smirk watching your face shift to a scarlet contrasting the skin tone of your cheeks.

“Yes..?”You inquired. You wainted for him to speak watching his eyes change to a gentle expression something you’d thought you never witness in all your life.His arm came to wrap around your waist to bring you close to him in an embrace.While his pinky finger came to hook around your own in the start of a pinky promise.

“When your stuff is done over in America...”He started to say before pausing to get the right words out. You saw his brows knit together a bit in frustration.You knew he wasn’t the type for the mushy stuff though the grand gesture he mind meant more to you than he would ever understand.

He felt irritated try to convey what he meant not being the words kind of guy. “I love you too,dumbass,”he spoke bluntly to you making you lift your lips into a dorky grin.”So, you better promise me you’ll comeback.”

You responded by squeezing your pinky around his you answered.”It’s a pinky promise, Katsuki.” Your smile brought back that flustered expression.He scoffed, looking off to the side he would not have you outdo him.

“Oh, I think have something better to seal the deal, [Y/n].” He grinned at you, making you blink confusion. A tug of your joined pinkies pulled you forward, making you press your lips against his own. Your first kiss with Katsuki was unexpected, though you weren’t complaining.

You flushed a deeper scarlet; you felt yourself melting in against him, somehow he surprised you which you never understood after all  you didn’t much care as you enjoy soft kiss you shared.

“This is so manly...Congrats, Bakubro.”

Kirishima was sniffling manly tears in the background. While everyone else in the airport awed and cooed at the new couple.

Your pinkies never came undone from each other while you kiss continued. A pinky promise would become a precious memory.It started your relationship with Katsuki. You planned on keeping your promise to return.You would come back to the boy that stole your heart. 

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Welp that is it for part two guys!!! I hope you all have enjoyed this there might be another installment. I really appreciate all who have read this one shot series. I apologize in advance for the OOCness within the series.

Please reblog and comment for feed back.😄

[myarmsaretoolong]

Psych 101

@whumptober2020​ Prompt #11: Psych 101 | AltPrompt 14: Shot

Word Count: 1692

Warnings: Gun Violence | Blood

Synopsis: Tony and Peter are attacked at what should have been a simple press conference revealing the next heir to Stark Industries

Read Under the Cut | Read on AO3

“Alright, you ready for this, kiddo?” Tony said as he and Peter weaved through the halls of the Avengers Facility. It was a big day, Peter’s first appearance in a press conference - Spider-Man aside - and the announcement of a new heir to Stark Industries would cover the headlines for days.

Peter rhythmically clenched and unclenched his fists trying to work out his nervous energy. “No, not really. But yeah.”

“Don’t worry,” Tony squeezed Peter’s shoulder. “I’ll have your back in there.”

“Are there any rules I should know about? Like a ‘Do’s and Don’ts’ kind of thing?”

Tony hummed. “Well, firstly you gotta think before you say anything, but not for so long that it looks like you’re thinking. If you don’t like a question they ask, just turn it into a joke - or give me a nudge and I’ll handle it. And give them a flash of that Parker smile, it’s been known to melt hearts-”

“Yours included?”

“Yup,” Tony nodded once. “Mine included. How did you think you got here?”

“Hard work and dedication?”

“That too, I suppose. Oh, and don’t mention Spider-Man at all. Superhero stuff tends to lead down a rabbit hole and we both know you’re prone to rambling as is.”

Peter threw his arms in the air and sighed. “Great, well now all I’m thinking about is Spider-Man.” Tony chuckled. “Try not to overthink it. Remember, I’ll be beside you the whole time.” They came to a stop outside the door to the press room, Happy, vigilantly standing guard outside, nodded a greeting. “Last chance to back out, Pete.”

“No,” Peter said, shaking his head. “I can do this.”

Tony wrapped his arm over Peter’s shoulder and pulled him into his side, pressing a kiss to the bird’s nest he called hair. “That’s my boy. Now,” Tony turned his attention to Happy by the door, “If you’d do the honours, Mister Hogan.”

“Gladly,” Happy replied. Though he clearly tried to hide it, a smile pulled at the corners of his lips, just barely visible before he turned and cracked open the door. Before letting Tony and Peter enter, he stuck his head through the gap and surveyed the room. Seemingly content with what he saw, Happy stepped back and allowed the others the file through. “You’ll do great, kid,” he whispered, following close behind Peter, “I know it.”

“Thanks, Happy,” Peter muttered over his shoulder. He turned his head towards the at least thirty strong crowd all pointing flashing cameras in his and Tony’s direction, some even calling out questions. Tony strode to the centre of the stage at the front of the room, one arm held out to welcome Peter to join him, he did so, tucking himself just slightly behind his mentor for safety.

“Alright, alright,” Tony called over the racket of clicking camera shutters, an easy going grin on his face. “You’re gonna scare the kid, it’s his first time out here so cut him a little slack.”

“Tony!” Peter hissed, lightly punching Tony’s back with his hidden arm.

Chuckling, Tony held his arms out in a welcoming manner. “Thanks, everyone, for coming out here. Believe me when I say your bosses are going to love you come the morning prints, this one’s a real doozy.” A series of mutters broke out amongst the crowd, an excited buzz filling the room. “This,” carefully, Tony manoeuvred Peter to stand by his side, his arm secured over the kid’s shoulders. “Is a very special kid I’d like you all to meet. Peter Parker, my personal intern here at Stark Industries.”

Tony paused, allowing a few seconds as another flare of camera flashes started up. Peter held up his hand and waved. Noticing the quiet tremor in said hand, Tony squeezed a little tighter and rubbed his thumb in small, calming circles. Maybe the kid could do with a little pep talk. “He’s diligent, hardworking, and most importantly trustworthy. If my life rested in his hands, I wouldn’t have a fear.”

Peter smiled wide, but muttered through gritted teeth. “I don’t see how this is helping. Now it seems like I’m going to murder you.”

“I digress.” Tony clapped his hand twice against Peter’s shoulder. “The reason I’ve dragged the kid out here in front of you today is to announce him as the heir to Stark Industries.” As soon as the words left his mouth, the room exploded. Much the same as his other infamous press conference. Reporters leapt up out of their seats, stammering to yell their questions and jostling for the best photograph position.

That’s when it all went wrong.

Tony felt Peter’s shoulders tense under his grip. At first, he assumed it to be nerves, but then he noticed the way the kid’s head swivelled about the room wildly. Scanning the faces of every reporter in the room. Happy noticed it too and half stepped forward, half reached out to grab the door handle behind him. They both knew what this meant.

At the last second, Tony spotted the guy violently forcing his way through the crowd, something small and metal clasped in one hand. There wasn’t time to react. Not for Tony, at least.

The guy levelled his gun at Tony’s chest. Screams broke out, Happy’s included as he started across the stage. Peter slipped from Tony’s grip and turned, shoving his mentor down to the ground with a full bodied tackle. A horrific shot rang out. The guy fled.

Happy reached them first. He grabbed Tony’s shoulders and rolled him onto his back, already searching for the gunshot wound. Tony pushed his hands away and scrambled to his hands and knees, crawling towards Peter. The kid’s face already held the sheen of a layer of sweat and he clutched a hand over his abdomen. Blood seeped between his fingers and trickled to the floor where it pooled together.

The security team began shouting orders. Some chased after the attacker, while others fought to remove the press, most of whom stood in a state of shock. Some - monsters, Tony would later describe them as - pulled out their cameras and took photos. The image of a young man laying on the floor, weakly reaching out for his equally terrified father-figure would cover every news outlet the next morning.

Tony grabbed Peter’s hand and pulled the kid into his lap, his other hand pressed down over Peter’s wound. “Sorry, kiddo,” he whispered when Peter’s face curled up in pain. “I have to.”

“I think I’ve been shot,” Peter rasped. Tony couldn’t tell if he was trying to make a joke, or simply in a state of shock. Why not both.

“Yeah, Pete, me too.” Tony turned his head towards Happy who now stood, his phone pressed to his ear. “Hap?”

“Doctor Cho’s on her way down here from the mebay. She’s bringing a stretcher. Two minutes.” Happy relayed the information quickly before kneeling by Peter’s side. “Hey, did you hear that? Hang on a little longer, then Cho can dose you up with some of the good stuff.”

Peter chuckled wettly. Blood specking his lips. “I don’t think ‘Do Drugs’ is a message you’re supposed to give to kids.”

A tear slipped over Tony’s cheek, followed by countless more. He didn’t - couldn’t - let go of Peter’s hand, so let them fall without wiping them away. “Hey, we never said Happy was Uncle of the Year.” His joke fell flat, the delivery ruined by his voice cracking. Still, Peter laughed again, this time ending in a coughing fit. “Shhh,” Tony hummed while Happy rubbed circles of Peter’s arm. “It’s okay, Pete. We’re here.”

Doctor Cho burst through the door, a pair of nurses following her and dragging a stretcher between them. Happy backed up to allow her room, Tony couldn’t bring himself to move away. “Prepare the mebay for major hemorrhage protocol,” Doctor Cho ordered one of the nurses - who ran out of the room - before turning her attention to examining Peter. “Dammit,” she hissed, “there’s no exit wound. The bullet could have lodged anywhere inside his chest or abdomen. Help me get him on the stretcher, stat.” She looked up at Tony expectantly, he could only offer wordless bobbing of his mouth in reply.

“I’ve got it.” Happy stepped forward and helped Cho and the remaining nurse transfer Peter onto the stretcher. “Tony,” he whispered, gently pulling his hands away from the kid so Cho could apply a temporary bandage to stem the bleeding. “Let her work. She’s the best shot we have.”

Tony looked down at his blood stained hands, then watched as they whisked Peter away. “I-I was supposed to have his back.”

Happy nodded and started to guide Tony out of the room. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

* * *

After washing away Peter’s blood from his hands and changing into clean clothes, Tony stood by Peter’s bedside, Happy opposite, and May somewhere between the city and the Facility.

Peter’s hand twitched, and Tony instinctively reached down to take hold. Relief flooded his body when he squeezed back, weak, but there. “Hey, kid.” Tony gently brushed his hand through Peter’s hair. “You awake?”

“Mm-hm,” Peter murmured, his eyes fluttering open only to squint against the bright light. “What happened?”

“Someone attacked the press conference, do you remember?”

Peter reached up and splayed his hand over his face. “Right, yeah. The gun.”

“I think I owe a thank you for that.”

“It was nothing,” Peter said.

“Nothing?” Happy huffed disbelievingly. “Kid, you could have died. The bullet missed your heart by a millimetre according to Cho. It’s a miracle you’re not dead.”

Peter’s grip on Tony’s hand increased tenfold. Tony shot Happy a disapproving glare. “Nice work, Hap.”

“Uncle of the Year,” Peter laughed.

“Ah, so you remember all of it, then?”

Peter nodded slowly, his hand falling back to his side as he met Tony’s eye. “I guess I had your back, huh?”

“You sure did, Pete.”

“I love you, Tony.”

Tony’s heart filled with the same warmth it did every time the kid said those simple words, a genuine, not press-faked smile lit up his face. “Love you too.”

[sadgirlx9]

It’s funny because I went on a first date again after a long time, thinking I could get over you. The whole time I sat there in the noisy bar listening to the music more than I was listening to my date. I really wanted to tell him to shut up or just have him see how bored I was. We all knew I was too nice to let that happen though. I sat there, listening to him ramble about how many ladies he had before and how he’s such a smooth talker. I couldn’t keep you off my mind no matter how hard I tried. I had flashbacks to when we played pool and how you had so much fun ‘teaching’ me how to play. I caught myself drifting away, zoning out, while he spoke.

“Am I boring you?” He caught me. Crap.

“Nah, I’m just thinking about all the times I brought other guys here for our first date,” I let out a nervous laugh, thinking why the hell I said those words to him.

“I’m going to go outside for a smoke,” I tried changing the subject.

“I can come with… if you want,” he suggests, half-heartedly.

“I really don’t care if you want, that’s fine,” I was trying so hard not to sound so harsh.

We stood outside talking and you came up. I told him about my best friend who unknowingly broke my heart. My best friend that tried to leave me way much earlier than we expected. My date stood there, swaying. He was already drunk but I was there trying to get him to understand that he didn’t compare even the slightest. He inched closer and closer to me on the sidewalk and I wondered if he noticed how I kept backing away from him. Distancing myself. I just wanted to get drunk at that point, honestly.

We went back inside the bar and I went to the bartender to get another beer. I ordered my date and I another shot. Jameson, the only whiskey I could drink like water because of our late night hangs. I took the drinks back to our table and he took them right away, telling me he was having fun. He inched closer to me again and I let him put his arm around me. I kept peering over to our usual table in the corner and tried to stay present in our conversation.

“So, after this,” He comes closer to me, trying to whisper into my ear, “did you want to go back to my place?”

I wince at the question and try not to laugh.

“I think I’m going to go home,” I tried explaining that I needed to wake up early for work. We both knew I was lying because I told him earlier that night that I didn’t have plans the next day. I downed my shot and beer and motioned that we should go outside to the patio. I couldn’t keep looking at that same old corner and at that damned pool table.

The thing is, no matter how clouded my mind was with drugs or alcohol. My mind always found a way back to you. The last night we spent together always plays in my head. Replaying those delicious moments, those sweet words. How we both laughed when something we both said resonated with an inside joke we shared.

“Let me be a man!” you yelled in a joking manner.

I could never keep a straight face around you. Always joking or talking mad shit to each other. I never knew what people meant when they said that their best love was a best friend. I always thought it would be awkward to try to change that into a relationship. But I get it now, I get it. After all this time, it’s you who fills my head. Our memories.

I recently came across this video from my deep files on my hard drive. It was a video of us from the first time we hung out. It was one of those silly videos that was initially supposed to be a photo and we’re giggling and saying hi to the camera. I remember my boyfriend at that time was so jealous because he said you were only hanging out with me to hit it. I remember laughing because we didn’t even know each other that well but we didn’t know that was the start of our never-ending friendship. We were inseparable and all my friends kept asking if you were my boyfriend when I was still clearly with the other guy.

Everyone told me that we were going to end up together and I never saw it. It wasn’t until that last weekend together. Everyone gushed over how we completed one another. How quiet we were when we weren’t together. It still makes me giggle because we were really that in-sync. The way the party started when we met up. Making everyone laugh with our jokes and roasting each other. I saw the sparkle we each had that everyone was talking about. It made me roll my eyes at how similar we were. Then I remember Doreen’s words.

“Me and Jay are best friends,” she told me one day, “you two are something else. Y’all are best friends but not how me and him are. You’re on a whole different level than all of us.” She really knew what she was talking about.

The date was coming to an end and I was sitting outside smoking cigarettes with what's-his-face rambling again about some adult film star that he was talking to. We laughed about how she was trying to charge him for every message and every phone call. I almost believed him, but to be honest, I really thought he paid her for all those texts and video calls. He would never admit it to me. He really is a nice guy, we’d known each other for at least six years. Maybe more. He was my supervisor at a warehouse job I had back in the day and we clicked. I honestly only ever saw him as a friend, probably the reason why I wasn’t taking this date seriously. I couldn’t. He just kept talking and talking about how great of a guy he was and what a catch he is. I mean, I guess he was. He wasn’t my type. I, however, liked guys who didn’t show any interest in me. That was my toxic trait.

He asked me the dread question once again. And again, I couldn’t hide my face, which showed him how I felt about going back to his place.

“If you don’t want to just say that,” he stated, kind of annoyed.

I noticed the more he drank the more controlling he was getting. Every time I tried talking to other people I recognized he would pull me by my arm or the back of my shirt. I looked at him with an expression as to say are you fucking kidding me? Or wrong bitch, man. He didn’t get it though, or maybe he did but chose not to address it.

We were in the parking lot now and we were deciding on how we were going to get home. He suggested we take an Uber to his house first so in case I changed my mind we could end the ride there. Very doubtful, my guy. Someone then poked me on the shoulder. I turned to see a familiar face. It was my ex-boyfriend and his awesome new girlfriend. I hugged them both and that didn’t rub my date very well. I tried introducing them but he was too busy trying to order the Uber. We all caught up with each other and I gave them some smokes. We stood there laughing about the last time we saw each other.

That was probably the last thing I remembered.

Me and my date did spend the night with each other. But the only thing on my mind was you. The last night I spent with you really did something to me. You did something to me. I can’t even enjoy a date without you entering my mind. I honestly remember getting slightly annoyed with you and the hold you so obviously had on me. I remember when I would go out and just be a serial flirt. Now I have flashbacks to how you used to touch me, how soft and delicate you were with me. How every time you said my name I would get weak. I loved how you treated me, like I wasn’t just some damaged thing. You really are my best friend. You ran your hands through my hair, and asked what was on my mind. You knew how to take care of me better than anyone I had ever known. I don’t think you know how much I tried to leave you. I tried so many times. Now it’s just me missing the hell out of you and countless nights crying myself to sleep. I need you so much but I’m scared to see you because I’m scared of the way I would break down. That’s why I choose to write you letters rather than visiting in person or phone calls. The sound of your voice alone would simply be too much. All I know is that you’re really the only person I would settle for. The only person who sees the real me and knows I’m enough. For me, it’s you. It’s always going to be you.

[maidenof-thesea]

Snakes & Butterflies | Part II

Pairing: Jimin x reader

Genre: Soulmate Au!, Fluff, Angst, Smut (Maybe, still debating)

Words: 2.9k

Warnings: None

Note: Here’s part 2 of my story, I hope you enjoy and understand that although Jimin has yet to come into the story, I hope you may find some of yourself in the character I am imagining and although BTS is important, I believe they would want us to value ourselves as much as we value them. 

The drive to San Ysidro was uneventful… I wish I could say that. My mom’s friend had always rubbed me off the weird way. Maybe it had to do with the fact that my mom took me to her once my Soulmate mark never appeared by the time of puberty, which is the latest it should have, in some rare cases. It was straight out of cult movie, people chanting, this random lady rubbing essential oils and raw eggs on me. That was enough to traumatize me as a child. I respect my mother’s culture but brujeria (witchcraft) is where I draw the line. My father took the more medical route, I had seen countless doctors and all could not tell my parents what was wrong, having no mark was unheard of, they were very rare cases. 

Miss Cassandra was the only one who could actually give my parents an answer. It is common knowledge that Marks are there just to guide people’s souls to one another and the rest is up to them. When my grandpa died, grandma’s mark started to fade, but it never completely faded away. Although my case is rare, Miss Cassandra told my parents that my Soulmate did not exist in this lifetime, that perhaps in my past life, I had sinned and now I was being punished. I rolled my eyes at the memory. She was such a witch, literally. Now here I am about to knock on her door.

“It’s about time you got here!” a small lady with long black hair whipped open the door, regarding me with annoyed eyes. “I’m trying to watch my novela! It’s not like Netflix, okay I can’t just pause it!”

“Hello to you too, Miss Cassandra '' I said entering in the small house and almost coughed with the smell of lavender and sweet lemongrass smell. Above the door hung some dried flowers, almost whacking me. “I love what you’ve done with the place very welcoming.”

“Haha, very funny” she said pulling my coat off and ushering me to her kitchen. “Hurry up I don’t have enough time for this. I have a cleansing to do in thirty minutes.”

“What another person with pink eye?” 

SMACK.

“OW!”

“Cállate!” she yelled. “You’re gonna wake up Miguel!” As if her yelling won’t. I sat on the bar stool and saw that she had already prepared all the ingredients for the henna tattoo.

“I don’t like that we’re appropriating Indian culture,” I muttered. 

“I don’t either,” she said stirring the mix. “But business is booming.” Great, consumerism trumps morals. Wait-

“Hold on,” I said in surprise. “What do you mean booming?”

“Ay Díos mio,” she exasperated. “You’re mother wasn’t kidding! It’s like you’re living under a rock! Do you really not watch the news?”

“Well I didn’t think it was such a big deal!”

“Of course,” she said rolling her eyes. “Those girls have all come to me for help.”

“Huh, did you tell them they were sinners too?”

“Of course not!” She said putting on gloves. “I said they were cursed.” 

“I love how nonchalant you are about all this.” I said as she wiped my arm down and began to apply the henna. 

“I’m being very serious, but I know you have a hard time believing me, you are your father’s child.” She said not taking her eyes off my arm. “You never told me why you always want this specific sword as a mark.”

“Besides the fact that you told me marks as weapons were rare,” I said averting my eyes from her family photos across the room. “Which they aren’t since I helped a couple with arrow tattoos yesterday, there’s not any other reason.”

“Arrows?” she said dapping the tool in more henna ink. “That’s strange…”

We fell into a comfortable silence and I let her continue to focus on her task at hand. My phone buzzed in my pocket and making sure she was focused, I pulled it out and sure enough, there was a message from Jungkook.

Jungkook [6:30 pm]: Hey noona, it’s me Jungkook. Is everything ok?

Me [6:32 pm]: Yes, I should be home around 7.

Jungkook [6:33 pm]: Okay, I’m making pasta. Let me know when you are on your way.

Me [6:35 pm] OK.

“Is that Jungkook?” Cassandra said as she stepped back to look at her handiwork. I was momentarily taken aback, but realized my mom must have already told her. “How did he take it?”

“I have no idea what you are talking about.”

“He knows,” Cassandra said already cleaning up the ink. “Take a look to see if you like it.”

“How do you know-” I stuttered in shock. “It’s fine, I don’t need to look and I’ll make some excuse, I’ll say that my mark was burned off too just like those girls.”

“Your scars are too old for that.” she said regarding me with pity. “Just tell him the truth.”

“I can’t.” I said with finality in my tone. I wanted this conversation to end. “I don’t need any more pity from anybody.”

“Ah you see, you say that, but that is not what you want.” She said sighing. “You may be able to fool your mother but you can’t fool me. Soy una bruja. (I’m a witch)”

“I’m not having this conversation,” I said standing up and getting my bag and coat, I pulled out a couple of twenties and placed them on the table. 

“Do not be afraid of fate, Y/N” she said placing the money back in my hand. “I’m not entirely sure why but there’s something different, a spark in your future.”

“So you can see the future now?” I said scoffing as I walked towards the front door. 

“You had a dream last night? About the past?” 

I stopped in my tracks. Feeling the color drain from my face.

“A dream that felt like a memory? But you don’t remember?” she said as she approached me from behind and when I refused to turn around, she continued. “Destiny always finds a way, no matter how hard you try to erase it.”

“Well,” I said shivering. “If destiny decides to come knocking on my door, I could tell it to fuck off.” Cassandra laughs and smacks me on the back, making me flinch. This woman hits me more than my own mother. 

“That is something you would say mija,” she said hugging me. “Promise me you won’t cry too much.”

“Huh?”

“Ve con Díos” she replies and closes her door, leaving me in confusion on her doorstep. 

“‘Don’t cry too much?’” I repeated softly to myself as I made my way back to my car, only to see a man leaning against my passenger side. Great. “Can I help you?”

The man looks up at me from his phone. He looked at me up and down and started to approach me but stopped when I reached into my bag. He holds his hands up.

“Hold on!” He says, “I’m not gonna hurt you, I just wanted to talk that’s all.”

“Well you can talk from there I can hear just fine.” I said clutching my taser in my hand.

“Are you Y/N?”

“How the hell-did you follow me here?!”

“NO!” He yelled. “God no! Look here look!” He pulls up his sleeve to his jacket and shows me his arm. Nothing. No soulmate mark. “I’m just like you.”

“Excuse me?” I said offensively. “What the hell do you know about me?”

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to sound rude. Let me explain.” He said pulling out his wallet, he pulls out a card and attempts to hand it to me. When I refuse to take it, he places it on the windshield wiper of my car. “My name is Minho. Lee Minho. I’m a professor at the University. I heard about your situation. I-”

My phone rings and we’re both startled and I quickly pull it out of my pocket and answer without checking. 

“Noona?” Jungkook says his voice laced with worry. “Where are you? It’s already ten minutes past seven.”

“Oh Kookie,” I say cooing even though my heart was beating rapidly. “Don’t worry, I just had to stop by for gas real quick. I’ll be there in 30.”

“Oh okay Noona” Jungkook says softly. “Drive safely okay?” I hum in response and he hangs up. 

“Okay bye babe! Love you!” I say as I hear the dial tone. I look back at Minho and he seemed a bit confused. “I don’t know what you are talking about. My Soulmate is waiting for me, so if you’ll excuse me.”

“I’m sorry,” He said moving away from my car. “But you are Y/N right?”

“I’m sorry but how in the hell-”

“Your father sent me here.” He said, “He said you would be here. He told me everything. If there’s somewhere more private you want to go to dis-”

“Look,” I said stepping up to him. “I don’t know why you think it’s appropriate to approach me like this but I am definitely not interested in what you have to say or offer and as a matter of fact you can forget that I even exist.”

“I’m sorry but I can’t do that,” Minho said with a hint of desperation. And with a shake of his head, he took a step back. “I didn’t want to meet you in these circumstances either, but I was just so curious and-”

“Look,” I said interrupting him. “I’m sure you have good intentions, but you are not the first man my father has pushed on me. You are the first to approach me this way though and trust me you are not making a good first impression.”

“But-”

“I have to go,” I said with finality, entering my car. “I have someone waiting for me.”

Instead of stopping me, Minho just watched me go. I sighed with relief once I got back on the highway. I would have to break so many laws just to make it on time and I was grateful that the traffic wasn’t too bad. Once I had a view of the cottage, I slowed down not wanting to scare the beach goers. My phone started to ring again and instead of Jungkook’s name like I expected, it was an unknown number. I answered and a deep gruff voice resonated from the speakers of my car.

“Why do you always have to disappoint me?” My father said with an eerie calm voice. 

“How did you get my number?” I responded back, clenching my hands on the steering wheel. “Mom pro-”

“Do you really think she had a choice in the matter?” 

“And do you think you have the right to decide she has no choice?” I scoffed. “You must have threatened to divorce her again. And you’re supposed to be Soul-”

“ENOUGH.” He all but roared and I flinched causing me to jerk the car. 

“I’m driving right now,” I said rolling my eyes. “So if you don’t mind, can we keep this conversation civil?”

“You’re gonna want to talk to this professor.”

“Why? Because he has money?” 

“His research-”

“So what now I’m gonna be a lab monkey for this guy?!”

“Y/N did you see his Mark?” He said calm once more, and when I said nothing, he continued. “He doesn’t have one either. Just like you.”

“What?” 

“Talk to him.” He said and the phone call was disconnected. I had managed to park on the driveway of the cottage. On my windshield, I could see the business card that Minho left. I felt my breath leave my lungs and I could feel tears starting to pool in my eyes. My thoughts were racing and it made me dizzy. I quickly got out of the car and made my way to the beach, not even going to the cottage. Thank goodness it was a short walk. Once I stepped onto the uneven sand I sat down and hugged my knees to my chest. I then proceeded to take deep calming breaths and once more I focused on the sound of the waves, willing myself to think logically and calmly. 

He doesn’t have a mark? Is he one of the victims too? Or was he really just like me? Did he never have one like me? And if so, what does that mean for me? Could it be possible that no mark could be a Mark?

“Is he my Soulmate?” I thought out loud. 

“Noona?” 

I jumped up from my position that I almost lost my footing, and strong arms caught me. Looking up, Jungkook was staring down at me in confusion and shock once he saw my tear stained cheeks. I quickly scrambled from his embrace and wiped my cheeks.

“Jungkook!” I said avoiding eye contact. “How did you-”

“Why are you crying?” Jungkook said cupping my cheeks in his hands. I felt my face get hot. “Is this about your Mark?”

“Let’s go inside,” I said tugging his hands from my face, but I held his hand as I led him back to the cottage. “Did you start the movie?”

“Y/N,” Jungkook said stepping his way in front of me, blocking the path. “Why were-”

“Just got off the phone with my dad,” I shrugged. It wasn’t exactly a lie. “The usual: ‘You are such a disappointment’, ‘You’re not my daughter if you are useless.’ The works.”

“I don’t remember him being like that,” Jungkook said, pulling me to a hug. I cleared my throat as I felt my face once again go hot. This boy was gonna give me heart palpitations. 

“People change,” I replied, wrapping my arms around him. “Like you. When did you get so tall! I still can’t believe you’re the same Kookie that used to pull on my pigtails.”

“Noona,” Jungkook whined and bent down to tuck his face in my neck. I felt myself stiffen and almost immediately he released me and started up the path to the cottage. I quickly followed, not wanting to be out in the cold anymore. I followed him inside and Luke Skywalker’s face was on the TV screen and I squealed and jumped onto the couch getting myself comfortable for the movie marathon. Jungkook comes back from the kitchen and hands me a bowl of pasta to which I hum in thanks, my eyes never leaving the screen. “People never really change.”

I looked at him and he was staring right back. I put the pasta down and grabbed the remote to pause the movie. We sat in silence for a bit. Yuki jumped onto the armchair across from us and was staring intently at me, almost as if waiting for me to speak up.

“Jungk-”

“Noona,” Jungkook says, “You don’t have to explain anything to me, if you’re not ready.”

“I-” I sighed. “Depends on what you want to know..”

“Since when?” He sighs. “How long has it been?”

You should tell him the truth

“If I tell you,” I say as I clench my fingers. “Will you promise not to look at me differently or walk on eggshells around me?”

“Noona,” Jungkook says, turning to face me. “Why would I look at you any different?”

I turn to look at him with incredulous eyes and his eyes shined with sincerity. It threw me off. I look back at Yuki who started to purr, almost as if to encourage me.

“Well when I hit pube-”

“No Noona,” Jungkook said with a sigh. “How long have you shut yourself off from the world?”

“I’m not sure I understand,” I said confused. “Why does that matter?”

“Seriously?!” Jungkook shouted, standing up. “Noona, why aren’t you acting like yourself? You were never one to hide, there’s moments where you seem like yourself but then you’re this completely different person-almost like your mem-”

He stopped abruptly almost if coming to a realization or as if he said too much. 

“Jungkook,” I said standing up as well, wanting to comfort him but not sure what to do. “You aren’t curious as to why I don’t have a mark? I mean that’s what everyone-”

“Noona,” Jungkook said almost exasperated. “Mark or not, you’re you. I know that life changes people, I understand that but you act as if you’re ashamed.”

“Kookie,” I said stepping back. “You have no idea what my life has been like.”

“I’m sorry,” Jungkook said covering his face. “You’re right, but I can’t but feel guilty-”

“Jungkookie,” I said rubbing his back. “You have no reason to feel guilty.”

“I’m sorry that we-that I wasn’t there for you.” Jungkook sighed as he wrapped his arms around me, using my head as a headrest. Normally I wouldn’t be comfortable with this amount of skinship, mostly because I never let myself get close to anyone besides my mom and Jennie. But with Jungkook, it felt so natural and I felt a sense of relief. “Jimin and I would have never let you hide…”

I felt myself stiffen with the mention of Jimin’s name, and I almost recoiled from him, almost as if my body felt a sense of shame. But why would I feel that way?

“Noona?” Jungkook said, cocking his head in confusion. “Are you-”

Jungkook’s phone rang, interrupting him as we both came to our senses. He quickly ran to get it from the kitchen table as I gathered Yuki in my arms, requesting cuddles from her. 

“Speaking of the devil,” Jungkook said, his voice laced with a hint of anger. He showed me his phone and ‘Jiminie Hyung’ was facetiming him. 

Prev / Next 

Masterlist 

[chickensarentcheap]

I Found

Chapter 5

Sorry this is so long. But it made no sense to split it up.  I promised @c-a-v-a-l-r-y som Ovi and I didn’t want to let her down ;)   also tagging @alievans007 and @hemmyworthy

“I've got a bone to pick with you,” he says to Ovi three hours later.  It was a conversation that would be best done in private, but with thousands of miles and countless hours separating them, face time was the next best thing.  “A big fucking bone.”

The kid looks good. Taller. Muscled. More mature in the face.  It is surprising how someone can change in the course of just a year.

“What did I do?” Ovi laments. “I didn't do anything.”

“Cut the shit, kid. You know what you did. What was the first thing I told you? When Esme gave you her email and her cell number?”

“To make sure that I didn't accidentally send her anything dirty off the internet. And to make sure none of my friends got my phone and sent her dick pics.”

“Okay. What was the second thing I told you then? Do you remember? The second and more important thing.”

His brow furrows as he strains to remember.  Then his eyes widen when he realizes his mistake.

“Yeah, you got it now, don't you, mate.  You figured it out.  I specifically told you not to message her about serious shit. That if you got any chatter about bullshit going on over there that you were to get a hold of me. Not her. So why the fuck up?”

“I don't know,” Ovi laments. “I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I don't know why I did it. I just did. I didn't mean to. It just happens.”

“That's the kind of bullshit excuse guys make when they fuck someone else or knock someone up.”

The kid frowns. “What?”

“Never mind. Point is, you opened a whole can of worms over here, mate. You really stirred the shit pot. Can you guess what happened? Can you just guess?”

“You got into a fight?”

“You're damn right we did. And this wasn't your normal fight about leaving the seat on the shitter up or leaving dirty socks on the bedroom floor or drinking the last of the milk straight out of the carton. This was the kind of shit show that happens when your girl asks you if she looks fat in what she's wearing and you say the wrong thing. This was almost months...if not years...of me sleeping on the couch, kid.  And I'm sorry but I kind of like sharing a  bed with my wife. You're lucky I can't reach through this thing and strangle the ever loving shit out of you.”

“I'm glad you can't. That ending would not be good.”

“No. It wouldn't.  You really freaked her out, kid. She's fifty shades of fucked over here. And not fucked in the fun way. Her nerves are all over the bloody place now. She's freaking the hell out. And I'm the one that has to do battle against that demon. Not the particular hill I want to die on.”

“Die? Why would you die? She's going to kill you? I don't want her to kill you because of me. Let me talk to her. Let me...”

“It's a bloody saying, mate. But with the state of the things over here, she just may smother me in my sleep or poison my food.  I know you didn't mean to do it, but fuck mate, what a goddamn mess.”

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to cause trouble. I just thought...I don't know...I just thought maybe it was better to talk to her.  So you wouldn't get upset with me.”

“So I get upset with her instead? Well played, kid. Well played. Don't let it happen again, okay? You come to me. If it is shit like this. She doesn't need it. She's got enough shit to deal with. Don't add to her plate.”

“I'll call her. To apologize.”

“Just leave her alone for now. Let her come to grip with things. It's not a good time right now. She's not in a good place. So do me a favour and just hold off, okay?”

“Okay. I really am sorry, Tyler. I didn't mean to cause trouble. I just thought maybe she could help so I wouldn't have to come to you. Please don't hate me.”

“I could never hate you, mate. You know that. So what's up? What's going on? I only got so much out of her before shit hit the fan.”

Ovi delves into a tale of increasingly suspicious and frightening behaviour.  What started out as simple hang ups on his cell and home line had someone transformed into dead animals left at the front door,  graphic images sent to his email of dead bodies blown apart by bullets, warnings to watch his back when he was out on the street; that he better have eyes on the back of his head. And within the last two days  things had really stepped up: extremely vivid descriptions of how and where he would meet his untimely demise.

“Let me guess,” Tyler says. “The bridge.”

Ovi nods.  He looks as if he may cry. Or throw up. Or both.

“Mother fuckers,” Tyler mutters, and rakes a hand through his hair. “Did you tell the guys watching you all this? What did they say?”

“They said to just ignore it. That it was probably just someone playing a sick joke.”

“Rookies. You always take this shit seriously. Did you call Nik?”

“She's the one who told me to call you. But I got scared and I called Esme instead.”

“Scared of me? Why?”

“You get so angry. You get so angry and you said the doctor said you're going through a lot of stuff and...”

“Yeah my brain's mighty fucked up but that doesn't mean you keep shit from me.   There's nothing I wouldn't do for you, kid. You should know that by now. Outside of this, how are things going? How's school? What about the cute girl that you said you've been checking out for a while?”

Ovi is clearly relieved with the change in conversations. And he willingly and happily dives into tales of both his school exploits and his social life. The kid's become the hell of a story teller since coming out of his shell'; leaving no stone unturned, no details (even the most trivial out). And his face is content and his voice animated and it's almost enough for Tyler to forget about the shit the kid is dealing with. Alone, without the protection and the guidance of his father, with nothing more than servants, maids, and bodyguards to give him necessary human contact and care. It's a shit life. Sure, the money was great. And everything that came with having that kind of money. But how do you live day in and day out knowing what kind of prick your old man is? Knowing he's responsible for putting drugs out onto the streets and into the hands of vulnerable kids? Always having it on your mind that he was capable of killing another person?

That last part hits hard. He was that man. He was more than capable of taking a life. He'd shown it hundreds of times. And he wonders if he'll ever tell his daughter about that side of him. About his mercenary days.  And how she would react to the news. It would suck coming from someone else, he supposed. Honesty was the policy. But how to tell your kids about something like that without totally fucking them up? Without them hating you?

That last part is a brutal kick in the nuts.  The thought of his daughter hating of...thinking less of him...well it fucking kills him. And he briefly closes his eyes and struggles to get that thought of his mind.

“Tyler?” Ovi's voice. “Are you okay?”

He gives a reassuring smile. “I'm fine mate. Just a killer headache. It's been a long day.  So there's nothing on the girl front? You haven't made your move yet? What's wrong with you?”

“I'm nervous,” he laments. “I don't know what to say to her.”

“I'm going to have to give you some pointers when I get there. Light a fire under your ass.”

“You're coming? Here?”

“Looks like it. But there's a lot to work out. I've got to get a hold of Nik and make some arrangements.  It's going to take a few days at least. And my wife won't let me come alone...”

The kid's entire face lights up.  “All three of you are coming? I get to meet the baby?”

“I'm not making any promises, okay? There's things that Esme and I need to talk about and work out. But she's pretty adamant about not letting me go alone and I've learned to pick my battles. Do me a favour, would you? Send me those pictures you got. Did you take any photos of the shit sent to the house?”

“Of course. I do remember some things you told me.”

“Send those to me too.  What about the calls? You get any numbers?”

“All unknown numbers.”

Tyler knew it was too much to ask for things to be simple for once.

“I want you to send me anything and everything you have. And don't breathe a word of this to anyone around you, got it? Not a word. Not what's happening, not who you've been talking to. Don't even say my name. Less people know, the better. I'm still not sure if those fuckers know I'm alive or not. But let's just be on the safe side for now.”

They know, he thinks, as Ovi rambles some more about school and the girl he likes and how excited he is that he's going to be getting pointers from someone with experience. His friends know shit, after all. They're just as green and awkward as he is.  

They know I'm alive. That's the only reason for this. They're trying to get me back there. And if they know I'm alive, they'll figure out my name. And once they know my name, nothing will be able to stop them from finding out where I am. Where I live. With my wife and my child.

And suddenly, it all becomes so much more serious than he initially thought.

*****

“What are you doing?” Esme asks later, as finds him at the kitchen table, the laptop open in front of him, a pen and a pad of paper off to the side.  “Watching porn? Learning new moves? You have to write them down so you'll remember?”

“Smart ass,” he grins, and she stands behind his chair and rubs his shoulders before pressing a kiss to the top of his head. He watches as she crosses the room; the way she has to stand on her tip toes to get a coffee mug down from its shelf.  That simple movement and the stretch of her arm causing the bottom of her t-shirt to rise up. Not only revealing a slice of the tattoo that covers her entire left rib cage, but gives him a peek of that ass clad in a lacy pair of black boy shorts.

 “Don't you have any clothes of your own?” he inquires, as she pours a mug of tea from the pot she'd prepared before heading for a shower.   “I swear that's all your shit taking up the room in the closet but you're always wearing my things.”

“I like your shirts better,” she replies. “They smell like you.”

That sounds like a good enough reason as any, he supposed.

“Baby asleep?” he asks, as she slips into the chair across from him.

“Finally. She was hungry again. She is your daughter. A bottomless pit for a stomach”

“She's growing,” he reasons, a hint of sadness in his voice. “I see it every day. How much she's changing. She pays more attention now. She looks for us when we talk to her. She smiles.”

“And before long she'll be bringing her first boyfriend home and asking to go on birth control.”

His eyes narrow as he stares at her. Long and hard.

She smiles and innocently sips her tea.  

“Did your father go gray at an early age? Did you give him wrinkles? Cause him to drink excessively?”

“He had five kids altogether. I'm the second last. So he was already a wrinkly, gray haired, borderline alcoholic before I came along. And you know why ? Because  had three boys before me.”

“Yeah, I'm sure that is exactly what caused his issues. The three sons that came before the first daughter. “

“You don't know my brothers,” she reasons.

It's true.  He doesn't. They've never actually come face to face.  He's seen pictures and vice versa and he's briefly chatted with them on the phone,  but he knows very little about them. Nor do they know much about him. All they really did know was that their sister went on a 'business trip', hooked up with some random Australian, and never went back to Colorado.  He was a mystery to them; ex army, someone that travelled a lot for work,  got mixed up in some bullshit that ended up with him in the hospital and needing months of recovery. They knew his name. What he looked like. His age and where he was from.

But that's where the details stopped. Their wedding was small and secretive. She didn't tell her family there was a baby on the way until the last month arrived.  Or why she had to be 'laid off' from work. It was messy and complicated; a lot of little white lies gathering into one huge fib. But it was for their own good.

“They're bat shit insane,” she adds. “They're savages.”

“My kind of savage or...?”

“Baby, there is no one out there that is your kind of savage. They're normal savage. They're normal human beings that do normal human being things. And we're...well we're...”

“Fucked up?”

“Well I was going to say complex but you always have had  a way with words.

Leaning back in her chair, she stretches her legs out and rests her feet in his lap.  Quietly sipping her tea as his one hand disappears under the table; dragging his knuckles slowly up and down the top of her foot, then along the bottom. Slowly, methodically.  His eyes focused on that pad of paper as his right hand mindlessly scribbles and doodles.  He's hard to read; a million and one things going through that beautiful head of his. Memories of his previous life. The things he's seen. The things he's done.  Replays of conversations that they'd had today on the beach, the argument that they'd found themselves embroiled in.  And more than likely some thoughts of Ovi and what ever had happened during their behind closed doors face chat. It wasn't cause for concern when Tyler fell quiet; he was a man of few words, the strong and often silent type. It was when he grew quiet and he got THAT look.  Where his brow furrowed and his eyes darkened and he'd absentmindedly (and repeatedly) dragged his top teeth  along his bottom lip. That twas when you should worry.

“What's up?” she asks casually. This is a thin line to teeter upon. Like walking across thin ice that you can hear cracking under your feet.

“Just tired,” he replies with a small smile, tilting his head to the side and causing his hair to fall across his forehead.

His knuckles continue to brush against her foot; over each toe and down the instep before travelling onto the ankle and down onto her heel and over the bottom. In the past few months he'd become increasingly needy when it came to physical touch. Both seeking it and giving it. Not that that wasn't a welcome change. This is a man who'd had to learn what it was like to love again. And to be loved.  “It's been a long day,” he adds. “Too much sun. Always make me tired, you know that.”

She nods slowly, both hands clasped around her mug, the rim pressed against her lips.

“I'm sorry,” he says. “About our fight earlier. For some of the things I said.  I didn't mean them. I say shit when I get upset.  I lash out when I'm pissed off. Always at the people who don't deserve it. And I'm sorry. You didn't deserve that.”

“I know. But to be honest, you were pretty tame. You've said a lot worse over a lot less.”

“Maybe. But I still hate myself for doing it.  I shouldn't have snapped like I did. I just wasn't expecting it, you know? It caught me off guard.”

“It's okay,” she assures him, and rubs her toes against his stomach. “And I'm sorry too. It probably wasn't the best time or place to bring all that up.”

“To be fair, that's kind of our history. It's how we met. Letting things happen in the wrong place at the wrong time. Seems to be our go to.”

“Remind me to never tell our daughter that. We're going to have to come up with a really good story for when she asks where she came from. Do you really want to be telling her she was conceived in some flea bag motel in Dhaka while you were trying to rescue a drug dealer's son?”

“Not exactly something you want to tell your kids.  We're definitely not a love story that someone would write home about.”

“I don't know.  It's the thing movies are made of, don't you think? Two people falling in love in the midst of some crazy shit? Surviving things that would kill most mortals? I'd watch it.”

“Would there be nudity?” he teases. “I'd watch if if there was nudity.”

“If it's about us, there'd be tons of nudity,” she says with a wink, and he can't help but chuckle.  Their sex life has always been epic. Right from the very beginning.  

“And I'm sorry for bringing Austin up,” she adds, and he glances up at the mention of his son.  “I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have stooped that low.”

“You didn't stoop low.  You had a right to bring him up. I know I don't talk about him much.  And you know I don't like to talk about him. But you were right.  I do think that way. I do feel guilty at times. I feel like a shit father who is forgetting about him. Who doesn't love him anymore because I brought another kid into the world to take his place.”

“She isn't taking his place, Tyler. That isn't why she's here. She's here because two people fell in love and they made something so incredible together. There's no other reason. She's here because she's meant to be. And she's here as her own person. She isn't a replacement.”

“I know. I do. But I can't help but think that way some time. My brain is fucked up.  All those fucking pills...” he jerks his head in the direction of the microwave stand. Where a wide variety of medications prescribed in his name take up residence in a locked drawer. Pills for the pain. Pills to help him sleep. Pills for anxiety. Pills for depression. Pills for every single fucking thing under the sun. “...they fuck with my head. Some days I can't even remember what day it is.”

“That's not the pills. That's old age.”

He smirks.  “First a Viagra joke and now a crack at my age? Do you want a divorce?”

“Not particularly, no. I kind of like having you around.  I think I'll keep you.”

“Yeah? Good. Because I kind of like hanging out here.  The food's good. I get my laundry done. I get laid on a regular basis. Things could be a lot worse, I figure.”

“You mean like sleeping on the couch for the rest of your naturally born life?” she teases, and he nods in agreement. Once again they fall into a comfortable silence; no noise except for the tick of the kitchen clock, the slight drip of the tap, and the hum of the laptop's fan. “So?” she eventually asks. “What are you doing?”

Sighing heavily, he turns the laptop to face her. The screen displaying one of the photos that Ovi had sent him: a headless cat with its blood smeared on the front door.

She grimaces. “I won't lie. I wish it was porn you'd been watching.”

“Ovi sent me these. And a whole bunch of others. Just weird and creepy shit for the most part. But whoever is doing this isn't messing around. It's all very deliberate.”

“You don't think they're just trying to scare him.”

“This goes above and beyond just trying to scare someone. This is bonafide psychotic bullshit. Whoever is doing this, they're after him. They're sincere with their threats. They're too invested in this. It's not just some passing fancy or some kid doing shit because they think it makes them look cool. This is the real deal. This is scary shit.”

“So he's definitely in danger.”

“No doubt in my mind. Maybe if it just went as far as the hang ups and the pictures, I'd say it's just someone fucking around. But the dead animals? The threats? The letters? That shit is very real.”

“Someone attached to Asif? Or even someone pissed off at Ovi's father?”

“This is definitely someone that's pissed off that Ovi got away and Asif died. Don't get me wrong; Nik had every reason to shoot him in the fucking head. But it is coming back to bite us all in the ass.”

She nods slowly, considering his words. “What's this?” she inquires, as she leans forward and picks up the note pad.

“Just some research I've been doing. Names mostly.”

Her eyes study what he has scrawled, eyes narrowing at one particular name.  “Farhad? That one sounds familiar.”

“It should. That's the little fucker that shot me in the neck and nearly killed me.”

“Hmmm...” she traces a finger over each letter, as if committing it to memory. “...no last name.”

“None that any of my contacts could come up with.  I'm sure I'll be able to find him if I put some feelers out.”

“Why would you want to? To kill him?”

“To talk to him. He's probably behind this bullshit. Why would you say kill him right off the hop like that?”

“Well, I wouldn't exactly blame you if you wanted to kill him,” she reasons. “Or if you did kill him. I think it's a reasonable response considering he almost killed you.”

“I'm not out for revenge. I'm out to help Ovi. This isn't about me.”

“But revenge isn't always a bad thing,” she gently argues. “And I think in this case...in our case...it's the only natural response.”

Tyler frowns. “He's a kid.”

“That shot you in the neck.”

“He's still a kid.”

“Why does that matter? Look at what he did.”

“He was only doing it to impress some drug lord dick head.  Now he's probably up to shit thinking he's big and bad because he did supposedly kill me.  But he's still a kid. A fucked up kid. But still a kid.”

“A kid that tried to fucking kill you!” she snaps, and he blinks at the anger in her voice.  It's the first time she's ever truly snapped at him. Not the little flip outs she has when she has to tell him twenty times to do something or when she's tired and he's getting on her last damn nerve. This was different. This was rage. Vehemence. And those were the eyes of a woman possessed.

A woman out for blood.

“Well he didn't succeed did he? I'm still here. It's water under the bridge.”

“The bridge. The fucking bridge! Always the fucking bridge!”

“The bridge? What the fuck...?”

“The bridge! The bridge where he shot you! The bridge where you almost fucking died! I was on that bridge too! I was the one that held you when you were dying. I was the one that had your blood all over me. I was on that fucking bridge too, Tyler!”

“I know,” he rubs and squeezes her foot in an attempt to settle her down.  “I know you were.  But just calm down and...”

“Don't you fucking tell me to calm down,” she snaps, and yanking her foot out of his lap, pushes her chair away and jumps up with so much force that it nearly topples over.  “Don't you do that. Don't you act like my feelings aren't valid!”

“I wasn't. That's not what I was trying to do. I know you were there. I know what you saw. And I wish every day it never came down to that. That you never had to see that. But I can't go back and change it. Didn't you say that to me today? That I can't go  back in the past and change how I did things?  This is the same thing.”

“No. It's not. It's the same damn thing at all! Don't you dare try and downplay this.”

“Esme...settle down...just take a breath...take a breath and let's talk about this calmly. Reasonably. Please...” he reaches for her and she slaps his hands away. “I'm not the enemy here, love. I'm not the bad guy. Don't push me away. You've been trying to do that for almost a year now. And I haven't gone anywhere yet.”

“How can you just sit there and be so calm about this?” she snags the pad of paper. “How can you act like this doesn't matter any more? That this name...this fucking name!...doesn't mean anything to you.”

“Because it doesn't. He isn't the first person that has tried to kill me.  And he probably won't be the last.”

“Jesus Christ, Tyler. Are you really trying to normalize this?”

“It's the nature of the beast. All part of the job. You knew that when Nik dragged you into this. You really think he's the first asshole to try and kill me?”

“He's the first asshole that's tried to kill you right in front of me!”

Sighing, he runs his hands over his hair and through his hair and then leads back in his seat, arms crossed over his chest. “Maybe you should stay behind. Maybe it's better if you and the baby stay here.”

She stares at him incredulously.  “You have got to be kidding me.”

“If shit hits the fan, which it probably will, it's probably best if you're not there. You went through it once. You don't need to see something like that again.”

“So you just wander off like you're fucking John Rambo and I stay with our baby...your baby...while you get killed?”

“What is this obsession with me getting killed? Do you really have that little faith in me?”

“Oh don't you play that card with me. I'm the only one around here that has had faith in you.”

“Then what the fuck is going on? What is happening right now? Because I honestly have no idea.”

“You're not a stupid man, Tyler Rake.”

“Well I must be because I have no fucking clue what you're going on about.”

“You almost died. You're not just some random of the street. Not some guy I was just randomly fucking. You're my husband. The father of my child. And you have the gall to ask me why I'm so upset? Oh I don't know Tyler. Maybe I'm upset that I saw you get shot in the neck and you were bleeding out all over me. Maybe that has something to do with it, do you think?”

“Okay settle down. Just settle down. Before you say something totally stupid you'll regret. I get it. I do. But you've got to let it go.”

“I'm never going to let this go. Not until this piece of shit...” she tosses the pad down onto the table. “...is lying dead in the street. I want revenge. You deserve that.”

“I don't want that. We got revenge when Nik killed Asif. Isn't that enough?”

“No. It's not. It won't be enough until that little bastard is stone cold dead and in hell where he belongs.”

And with that, she storms out of the room.

[goldstonegolem64]

Side story This takes place during  the three years that Voltron went missing. This is also a way for me to put some ideas I had out into the world

“It has been about twenty months since the castle of loins disappeared along with Voltron, some of it’s paladin and princess Allure of Altea. In their Absence they left behind the Coalition and the new Galra empire on the verge of another massive galaxy war. But thank to the efforts of Empire Lotor, Commander Matt Holt and the remaining Paladins of Voltron peace was maintained” Jay stopped reading the news articles and tossed the table onto his desk . He then removed his Glasses, rubbed the bridge of his noise and placed his glasses down on his desk. “ God I need  to get going home ” Jay said as he grabbed his glasses and was ready to  leave his office. 

In the passed year and a half. Jay was put in charge of a coalition and imperial sponsored Mercenary company despite his protest   called the Volt troop.The troop was made up of two fleets of Coalition fighter pilot, Two warship that housed a crew of three hundred each with a near infinite supple of old mode Galra sentries , Fifteen Valkyrie type and five gladiator type robeasts.The troops main job were to protect shipping vessels, clearing planets of Pirates or Maverick Galra fleet commanders that had left the empire after Lotor’s rise to power and  the rare red queen hive world  that was found. It was a pain in the ass. But after two year of fighting a nearly endless battle and countless deaths an near crippling fear that he would not return from a mission . It was nice to finally to not have that fear nagging at the back of his mind 

As he made it to the door it opened suddenly to Reveal a tall purple skinned man with white hair. Jay was caught off guard by this sudden appearance of his friend and the emperor of the Galra empire. Lotor 

“ OH Joseph have I caught you at a bad time” Lotor asked as  

“ No No I was just on my way out. But what brings you here Sir “  Jay asked as he straighten his clothes and looked more dignified. 

“ Please don’t call me sir. Joseph were friends and I’m here to personally hand you this “  Lotor said as he handed Jay a table 

Jay grabbed the table “ First I’m at work so were not friend were  employee and in employer “  Jay watched Lotor rolled his eyes as he heard that “ And second what am I looking at here “Jay said as he looked at the data pad that showed him cargo Ship routes along with picture of what looked like an Altean ships that looked like the Castle of lions. Jay felt his heart skip a beat but something in the back of his told him that it wasn’t them “ I’m guessing that we’re either looking at we’ve professional photo shopped image or we’ve found are selves another Arc”. Jay said as he handed the table back to Lotor

“ Yes it seems like it” Lotor said 

“ Does The Coalition know About this?” Jay asked 

“ Yes Mr. Holt was the one that informed me about it they already sent a team to recover it and they would like some added protection ”  Lotor said 

“ Alright then I will send the twins to handle it ?’  Jay said

 “ Now that we have that out of the way How are the boy’s doing ?’ Lotor said as the two start walking down the hallway 

“Well their still kind of mad at me for being away from home for long periods of time. But they are enjoying school and having friends their own ages. Fitz is finally getting a hang on math and science. Bastion is getting into some trouble do to his habit of hiding and setting up trip wires during recess which as caused a domino effect where other kids are following suit and several teacher have called me to find him Which is getting annoying because Bastion is getting better at hiding when he doesn’t like the class. Usamu is getting better with his powers we’ve lost a few plates but hey he’s getting better he’s also getting better at painting which is nice the girls are loving school and learning about everything “ Jay’s cheek marks started to glow a little “ As well as Ezra’s as moved” 

“ That’s good to hear “ Lotor said smiling 

“ Now how are you holding up mister emperor of half of the know universe  and how are my favorite generals doing I haven’t had time to call them seeing as I’ve been jumping planet to planet ever other week “ Jay said 

“ Well Acxa has spent most of her free time looking for missing paladins on her off time. Ezor and Zethrid are stomping out any warlord or pirates that dare come in to are territory they have also started dating “ 

“ Weren’t they already dating ?” Jay asked confused

“ I don’t know to be honest. Maybe they were and I’m just noticing it now . But never mind that . As for Narti she’s still recovering from being released from my mother control the druids and doctors say she will be cleared to return to active duty in the next few months”  Lotor said smiling 

“ That’s good to hear I” 

“ As for me. I’m board out of my mind. I don’t know how my Father did it. All I do is still there on the throne reading and listening to people reports. I beardly every get to go out and pilot my pieces of the Ragnarok without being followed by three warships. I missed the old day where I could go where I wanted with out everyone freaking out that I might go missing”  Lotor said 

“ well your the last of the royal blood line so if you go missing there will be a power vacuum that will case a massive civil war that will have either never end or Sendek will show up and wage a one side war against the coalition and one wants that” Jay said 

“ Your not wrong but still I hate it” Lotor said 

“ I know but still you have to do it for the better meant for the universe. “  

“ I know “

“ Now have you gotten back into the dating gaming?” Jay asked 

Lotor froze up and looked towards Jay “ No I haven’t but I have had a fair share of suiters. But none of them have meet my standers” lotor said

“ What are your standers again “ Jay asked knowing something was up 

“ Well they need to be head strong, fun to be round , have to have the same interests as me. Acutely like me for who I am and not what I am” 

“ Allura your still after Allura aren’t you “ Jay said as he opened the building front door letting the Emperor out first “Ever after what she said and did to you” 

“ Ok she called me a  tyrant like my father  and slammed me into the ground. Not the worst thing I’ve been through”

“ That’s true also do you want to come by for dinner seeing as your here and the kids would love to see you again”  Jay said as the hanger door opened to revel the Valkyrie sitting there waiting 

“ Sadly I have to return home I have a meeting in the next two hour “ Lotor said annoyed 

“ That suck” Jay said 

“ It dose but like you said. If I’m not the one doing it some one might get it wrong. Did I say that right ?”  Lotor asked 

“ Yes you did bud “  Jay said laughing a little  

“  Is it time to go my Pilot “  VAl said as she walked toward jay.” Oh hello Emperor Lotor It is nice to see you “  

“ it is good to see you too Val. “ Lotor said 

“ It’s Good to see you as well Is Ragna with you I wish to speak to him about something important?” Val asked 

“Sadly no he is currently Help Acxe in looking for the missing paladins But when I see him again I will tell him that you wish to spoke with him.”  Lotor said as he started walking back towards the ship he came in 

“Thank you and have fun at your meeting “  Val said as jay disappear into her mouth 

“ I’ll try” Lotor said as the Valkyrie started to talk off

The flight home was always a beauty to watch as the twin suns of Hades-4 started to set behind the massive mountain range that surrounded the city of Persephone. It was nice to look at the city below him as they passed by the mountain range  . As they flow out of the city the sight of a massive forest came into view an as they flow over it the sky turned from a dark green to a dark blue starry sky. it was a beautiful sight to and was one  reason he choose this planet as his new home. But the main reason he choose this world was the fact that it was close to the milky way so just in case someone tried to invade it and the school system here was good  for the kid so it was a win/win.

A smile creeped across jays face as the sight of a familiar mountain with a small town in the make at the foot of it. The town didn’t look like much but it was a nice place to start fresh and raise a family. It really helped Jay coup when the others when missing. As the Valkyrie got closer to the town he saw people walking down the street. Some stopped to look up and wave to him. he continued to fly over the town until he go a two story house that was next to a small pond as well as a hanger as they landed near the hanger jay got off Val as she opened the door to her hanger. As Jay was walking back to his house hands in his pockets. He notices that some one was sitting on the front step of the porch. As he got closer to the house he saw Fitz Sitting there talking to someone on his phone 

“ Yeah next week it will be fun just you and me at the festival” Fitz had a smile on his face unaware that his Dad was standing there watching him just out side of the porch light’s reach  .” Yeah I just need to ask my dad “ 

“ Ask me what Fitzy “ Jay said as his cheek marks started to glow  along with his eyes as he stepped into the light 

Fitz screamed at the sudden appearance of his dad “   Hi Dad “

“ Hi Fitz how was your day at school and who are you talking too”  JAy asked as he sat down next to his son

“ It was alright I mean it’s school what is going to happen and i’m taking to Axton “ Fitz put his phone on speaker “ Say hi Axton “

{ Hello Mr. Sorin } a female voice said over the phone 

“ Hello Ms.Mercer exactly what are you and my son plan on doing at this on coming school festival ?” Jay asked looking at His son as their face started to turn a bright shade of green 

{ UUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH nothing we were just going to hang out and play some games right Fitz “  Axton said trying but failing to hide her  embarrassment 

“ Yeah we just going to play some games and ride some rides” Fitz said still blush

“ Alright if that’s all then yes Fitz you can go just be home before midnight “ Jay said as he got up from the stair he was sitting on  and walked to the front door and before opening it jay turned back to look at his son “ And no funny business “ Jay then opened the front door and walked into the house followed by jay yelling “ I’m home” Jay walked into the living room 

“ Hello father” Bastion 

“ Hi dad” Usamu said  

Jay turned to see his other two son both sitting on the couch  Bastion was watching something on the tv while Usamu was drawing in his sketch book

“ Hey kiddos how was school.?” Jay said 

“ Same old same old  “ Usamu  said not looking away from sketch book

“ I punched a guy in the throat because he was picking on some kid in a whee chair “ 

“ First off that not good don’t punch people second of did you get caught punching this guy “ Jay asked 

“ No I punched then ran into the car and then Ezra drove off before anyone could see me “

“ Good to know and good on you for punching him and standing up for that kid. Now don’t do that again . Because I don’t want to hear Mrs. Henbit yelling at the next pta meeting about how her precious baby watched two kids beating the shit out of each other or some other stupid shit she’ll bitch about.”  Jay said annoyed as in the back of his mind he could hear the screech of henbit “ Now what do you guys want for dinner tonight?” Jay asked 

“ Ezra order pizza and took Molly and Clay with them to get it” Bastion said 

“Alright then” Jay walked over to the couch “ what we watching today”  Jay said then he sat down between his two sons and final started to relax from along days work.

[lizzy-c807fanfics]

The things we do for a friend

Can internet dating lead to finding your soul mate? Mary Margaret and David believe that is the case but it turns out they’ve both been burned in that arena before. They enlist their cynical friends Emma and Killian as back up for them just in case they get stuck. What happens when they all meet? (Rated M) FF

“Mary Margaret do I have to?”

“Please Emma, I really like him but I’m nervous to go alone. I promise just this one time.”

“That’s what you always say and then I end up finding a way to sneak you out of the restaurant when the guy turns out to be a creep.”

“Well, if all goes well with this one, and I have a good feeling about him, then this will be the last time.”

“Fine, I really hope he is. Honestly Mary Margaret I’m not sure how you can keep online dating. So far all the guys you’ve met have been creepy. Remember that guy that picked his nose when he thought you weren’t looking.”

“Ugh, don’t remind me about him. Thank god I had you watching from the bar. It’s a shame because he was actually cute. “

“Imagine kissing booger mouth at the end of the night.”

“That’s disgusting.”

“Oh, and what about that guy who picked food off of other people’s plates at the hibachi when he thought no one was looking.”

“I know they can’t all be winners but at least I’m putting myself out there. When was the last time you had a date?”

She frowned and chewed her bottom lip.” I don’t know, six months ago.”

“Exactly Emma. One guy breaks your heart and you become a cynic for the rest of your life? Not all guys are like him.”

“I know. Maybe booger eater is available.”

Mary Margaret swatted her on the arm.”Not funny!”

“Come on, it’s a little funny.”

She watched as her friend walked back to her office in a huff.

“Meet you at 7!”she called out.

She thought she caught the tail end of a rude gesture from her before she disappeared. She never ceased to be surprised by her.

Maybe Mary Margaret was right. She had been single and celibate for awhile now. She wasn’t about to step into the online dating pool like her but maybe she could make an effort to hang out with friends a little more. She had been head strong into her career for the last year and that one date she had, he was just ok, not anyone special that she would make an effort for.

She decided that she’d be a little more open to the possibility if something presented itself. She just had to get through babysitting Mary Margaret through another dating fiasco. She really did hope that this guy was decent for her sake. If she had to watch her beautiful friend sit across from one more bottom feeder she was going to lose it. Mary Margaret deserved someone kind, caring and decent like she was.

“Dave, are you certain about this one?”

“I feel like she’s my soul mate.”

“You said that about the last creature that you met and she stalked you for a month after that awful date. She was picking her teeth with a fork for heaven’s sake.”

“Killian, they’re all looking for love and the right person. I just wasn’t the right one for her. From what I hear her boyfriend Billy Bob is the one.”

“You still keep in touch with her?”

“She emails me sometimes.”

He shook his head. “What’s this one’s damage?”

“So far, I haven’t found one thing damaged about her. She’s beautiful, intelligent, funny and really nice.”

“Be sure to check in the closet for bodies Mate; she sounds too good to be true.”

I think this is the one. I can feel it.”

“Fine, I’ll be there but I’ll be the first to tell you I told you so if she turns out to be the spawn of Satan.”

“Great, it’s the usual place. I’ll give you the signal if it’s not going well.”

“Right, I walk by and pretend there’s an emergency at work.”

“Yes.”

“You’re paying my tab.”

He pat him on the shoulder and walked back to his office. “Don’t I always? Be there at 7.”

He never met anyone so optimistic about love and soul mates in his entire life until he met Dave. The man was hopeless. He watched him from the bar going on countless dates with these strange women. Each one just a little more deranged than the other but he continued to do it. He had to give him credit because at least he was trying, unlike himself.

He made the mistake of falling for the wrong woman at the wrong time in his career. He found himself out of a job and relationship all at the same time when his former boss walked in on him with his wife. He had no idea that the woman was married or that she was married to his boss. She’d used a fake last name and there were no family photos to be seen.

That was a mistake he would not be making again. He was lucky that Dave was around to help scoop him up off the ground and put him back together after that. So when Dave needed a little backup for his dates he couldn’t say no.

It was really the least he could do to sit at a bar and hang out in case his best friend needed support. He could be a good wingman and sometimes he actually met a nice woman to spend the night with, never usually more than that. He didn’t do relationships anymore, not after being burned so badly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She rushed into the restaurant at 6:55 hoping to catch Mary Margaret before her date started. She had a last minute client meeting and of course she got stuck in traffic. She looked around and didn’t see her anywhere yet. She also surveyed the room and there didn’t appear to be any single men sitting alone so she figured she’d made it in time.

She knew the signal; Mary Margaret would pretend to sneeze three times if it wasn’t going well. She would walk by her table and drop her napkin on the floor next to her if the guy showed any visible signs of being gross. After booger eater and plate grazer they had to come up with that one, she didn’t even want to think about armpit sniffer. She shuddered at the thought.

She walked to the bar and found an empty seat towards the end. She placed her briefcase below the bar and took her favorite stool where she knew she’d be able to see her friend no matter which table she’d be in.

She pulled out the pin in her hair and shook it down around her shoulders pulling out the waves with her fingers. Finally the bartender came over and she ordered a drink. She sat back against the bar waiting for her friend who now appeared to be late. She pulled her phone from her purse and scanned for messages.

Emma our date got pushed back to 7:30 because I had a client meeting run late. I hope this doesn’t inconvenience you. See you soon! MM

She quickly text her back letting her know she was there and it was no big deal. She took a deep breath and a sip of her drink.  She put her phone away and suddenly the seat next to her was occupied by a very handsome stranger dressed in a three piece navy pin stripe suit.

He had the perfect amount of scruff on his face and his hair was conveniently mussed enough to give him a bit of ruggedness to an otherwise neatly pressed man. He also had the most beautiful blue eyes she’d ever seen. She could get lost looking into them so she averted his gaze quickly before he noticed she was staring.

He did as she did placing his briefcase under the bar and waiting for a drink.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He rushed to the restaurant to meet Dave only to find out as soon as he got there that the time had been pushed back to 7:30. He was disappointed at first but when he saw the beautiful blonde shaking out her hair at the end of the bar he believed things were looking up. She happened to be sitting in prime date watching location so he moved quickly to take the seat next to her.

He noticed that she was drinking top shelf scotch neat, a woman after his own heart. He surveyed her gorgeous legs as he placed his briefcase under the bar, suddenly curious about how those would feel wrapped around him. He straightened up catching a whiff of the strawberry scent coming from her hair. She was intoxicating as well as beautiful.

He held out his hand to get the bartender’s attention. He looked over towards her and he could swear she smiled at him before taking a sip of her drink. He finally got his own drink and checked the time. Dave should be arriving any moment and he knew he should keep an eye out for him but he couldn’t help but keep an eye on even the smallest movements that she was making.

He noticed her looking around the room. He started to feel a little jealous; perhaps she was waiting for a date. He took a sip of his whiskey and looked towards the door.  He needed to focus on his friend, after all that was why he was there. He’d just have to hope the gorgeous blonde would be here for awhile.

She watched his beautiful blue eyes drink her in. She knew what she was doing and this guy was hot. She couldn’t help but tease him a little after she caught him taking an eyeful of her legs. She felt a rush of heat at the thought of his hands possibly rubbing up against leg as he sat up. She pushed those thoughts aside, for all she knew he was waiting for a date. Mary Margaret was going to be here any second and she needed to focus on her friend as promised. She didn’t want her friend kissing a booger eater.

She hoped to god for once Mary Margaret was right and this date was the one. If so maybe she could focus on her own needs and perhaps throw her celibacy out the window. She just had to hope this beautiful man was still here after the drama unfolded so she could at least get his number.

When she turned her focus back to him she noticed he was looking at the door. She felt a pit of despair at the thought that maybe he was actually waiting for someone. She picked up her drink and took a long sip letting the burn in her throat distract her. She focused back into the room and noticed Mary Margaret walking in with a blonde gentleman.

He looked like a decent person so far, neatly pressed, hair coiffed nicely and he pulled out her chair for her; very chivalrous. She was going to give him points for that. She took another sip and kept watch.

Ah, finally Dave shows up with his date; a petite woman with short brown hair that framed her pretty face. She was dressed professionally but feminine. So far she seemed Dave’s type and no red flags were going off. He sat back and took a sip of his drink as he watched. Out of the corner of his eye he happened to catch the gorgeous blonde next to him gazing in the same direction.  He smiled and took another sip. Perhaps she was on a mission of mercy herself.

She finished her drink and put the empty glass on the bar never taking her eyes off the table with her friend. Mary Margaret appeared to be having a good time. She was smiling and laughing. Her date had his napkin in his lap, kept his fingers out of any orifices that were visible and only had eyes for her dear friend. She smiled and turned back to the bar looking to signal the bartender meeting a gorgeous pair of blue eyes in the process.

She blinked slowly and then noticed the smile grow across his face.”Let me get that for you. Scotch?”

She smiled, he had a beautiful voice and accent that did things to her.”Neat please.”

He ordered two and turned back to face her extending his hand.”Killian Jones.”

She took his hand and felt a bit of electricity pass between them.”Emma Swan.”

The bartender placed fresh drinks in front of them and she picked it up to take a sip. She already felt relaxed after the first one. “So Killian, what brings you here tonight?”

“I suspect you are here for the same reason as I, in the duty of a friend.”

She looked over at the table where her friend was still smiling and laughing and turned back to him.”Internet date from hell watch, you too?”

He took a sip of his drink and smiled.”Aye, my best friend Dave swears he will meet his soul mate if he keeps trying.”

She laughed.”Mary Margaret is the same way. There have been some real winners. Please tell me your friend is normal.”

He laughed.”Aye, Dave is the most normal man I’ve ever met. Perhaps they have fulfilled their match. They look to be hitting it off, both of them seem equally happy.”

She looked over wistfully.”Yeah, I’m happy to see her smile. She’s one of the most decent and kind people I’ve ever met.”

“Dave as well. It’s nice to see him smiling on one of these for once.”

She took another sip of her drink.”So its safe to say your friend is not a booger eater?”

He laughed.”No, I’ve never seen him eat a booger. Is it safe to say your friend isn’t going to break any dishes or shout obscenities?”

“No, that’s happened?”

He chuckled.“Aye, he’s been on a few wild dates.”

“And I thought I had it bad watching some of her dates. No, I can assure you that she will not break any dishes and if she did she would be cleaning them up and begging the restaurant for forgiveness.”

“Wow, she does sound perfect for Dave.”

“What do you usually do if the date goes well?”

He shook his head.”Not sure, none of them have so far. These things usually end with me rescuing him from a psycho and taking him to another pub where we play pool or darts.”

“Hmm, yeah none of them have ever gone well for Mary Margaret either.Same with us but we get a sampler, drinks and laugh about whatever crazy guy she went out with.”

“What do you say we relieve ourselves of duty, find another pub and make a night of it together?”

She eyed him cautiously remembering her promise to put herself out there.”I want to let Mary Margaret know, just in case. How do I know you aren’t just telling me he’s a good guy, then I leave and he’s a creep.”

“Trust me Darling. Dave is one of the best people I know. He’s as far from a creep as you can get.”

She looked over once more to Mary Margaret who was smiling bright and focused completely on the man in front of her. “Alright. I’m game. Let’s go.”

“Brilliant. There’s a great little place a few doors down from here.”

“The Eagle, that’s where we usually go, they have great food.”

“Us as well. Seems great minds think alike.”

He climbed from his stool and extended his hand helping her down from hers. He bent down and grabbed both of their briefcases and extended his arm to her. She took her briefcase and his arm as they walked towards the door. They both looked towards their friend’s table as they left unable to catch either of their eyes because both were so wrapped in each other.

“Looks like we’re in the clear.”

He gazed into her beautiful green eyes trying to figure out what he did exactly to be this lucky.“Indeed. Let’s make the most of the rest of this night.”

She smiled and couldn’t wait to hear Mary Margaret’s story in the morning, hopeful she’d have one of her own.

Ch.2

She held onto him closely as they walked out into the cool night air. It had been raining earlier so the usual city odors had been replaced by fresh air. He pushed open the door to the pub and let her go in ahead of him. So far he seemed like a gentleman.

She gazed into his eyes as she passed through the door. “Thank you.”

“Of course.”

The hostess sat them in one of the booths off to the side. She never noticed that the ambiance in the pub lent itself very nicely for a date. Usually she was trying to soothe Mary Margaret’s tender feelings after her awful date so she never noticed.

She slid into the booth across from him and he smiled.”Well this was a nice turn of events. Normally Dave and I are pounding shots at the bar, knocking balls around on the billiards tables and he’s covering for the mishap he’d escaped from. I never noticed how nice it was in here before.”

She smiled.”I was just thinking the same thing.”

“What was it you mentioned your order when you come in here?”

“Oh the Eagle Sampler. It’s salty and greasy, comfort foods.”

He waggled his eyebrows. “What do you say Swan? Are you up for a little salty and greasy.”

She laughed.”Sounds good. You also mentioned shots?”

“Aye, Rum.”

“I’m game if you are. It’s been a hell of a week.”

He couldn’t help but notice the twinkle in her beautiful emerald eyes as she smiled back at him, just a glint of mischief present when she challenged him. Of course he’d agreed. It was nice to have a little fun instead of using the alcohol as a means to distract a friend who felt their heart was broken.

The waitress set them up with shots and put in their order for the sampler platter. He slid one of the shot glasses to her and picked one up himself. “To all the psycho dates our friends have endured that have led us to this moment.” She smiled and threw back her shot.  He slid her another and this time she gave the toast.”To being good wingmen.”  He held up his shot.”Cheers.” She knocked his glass with her own and tossed back the shot.

He watched her intently as she regaled him of stories of some of Mary Margaret’s past experiences. He couldn’t help but laugh. They’d each order a pint as well while they waited for their food to arrive. She was easy to talk to and didn’t seem to hold back her opinion. He liked that she was a bit of a spitfire. He also couldn’t remember ever having a date that was this much fun.

Mary Margaret would probably have her dating rules book out pointing to the rules that she was breaking at that moment, eating greasy food, drinking heavily, laughing, just being herself. The rules all felt phony to her and she wasn’t into playing games. That was probably one reason she begged off dating for so long. She liked herself and didn’t want to be anyone else.

Their steaming plate mixed fried foods soon came out and the waitress placed it in the middle of their table along with plates.

“Good Call Swan.”

“I know, I’m starving, the onion rings are the best here.”

She handed him one of the small plates and her fingers lightly brushed against his in the process. She felt a warmth rush to her cheeks when she noticed him smiling. As they ate their plate of fried cheeses, onion rings, potato wedges, chicken fingers and jalapeño poppers they learned they had a lot in common.

They were both professionals who worked way too much likely because they were both burned by a disaster of an ex. Neither of them took time to date themselves but always made time for their friends and their friend’s disastrous dates and neither of them had family to speak of outside of the aforementioned friends.

By the time they’d finished as much of the sampler as they could eat they were both laughing and she’d moved comfortably into the booth next to him.  He held her hand as he spoke to her, telling her tales about his days in university with Dave. They’d been best friends since freshman year.

She told him about how she first met Mary Margaret as interns for their company. They were thick as thieves from day one and the only interns to have been offered permanent positions with the company.  

The night went on and soon they were the only two left and the bartender was starting to give them the evil eye.

“So Lass can I interest you in a lift home?”

She ran her fingers up the buttons on his shirt and looked up through her lashes smiling.”I’m not sure either of us should drive.”

“I was thinking we could share a cab. I didn’t bring my car since these nights usually end in us being poured into a cab and Dave sleeping on my couch.”

“I don’t have my car either.”

“Cab it is then.”

He paid the bill as she slid out of the booth and he climbed out after her pulling out their briefcases behind him. She took hers in hand as well as his extended arm. This time she couldn’t help snuggling into his side. He was warm and he smelled delicious.

They walked out of the pub together towards the corner to get into the waiting cab. He pulled open the door and she slid inside. He climbed in after her and closed the door.

“Where to?” asked the cabbie.

He turned to face her realizing he didn’t know her address. She smiled never taking her eyes from him and replied. “184 N Freedom St.”

He slid over on the seat closer to her and she slipped her hand into his. He caressed the back of her thumb with his hoping their touch was having the same effect on her as it was him. He looked into her beautiful green eyes twinkling as they past under the city lights feeling the hum of electricity under his skin. He looked to her full lips hopeful that he would at the very least be able to kiss her.  

She licked her lips in anticipation. He was driving her wild rubbing his thumb over hers so she inched closer, her face inches from his now. She saw his eyebrow quirk up and the little grin grow on his face. She blinked her eyes slowly and looked towards his lips.

He leaned in closing the distance and capturing her lips in a soft sensual kiss. The electricity sparked between them as she slid her hands up and wove her fingers into his hair hungry for more. His hands gripped her hips and pulled her as close as he could get without her being on top of him. He couldn’t get enough of her and desperately hoped it was a long ride to her apartment.

The cab came to a stop rousing them back to reality and they broke apart slowly, panting with kiss swollen lips. She gripped his tie in her hand unable to control the smile on her face.”Come up?” He grinned. “I thought you’d never ask.”  He pulled the fair from his wallet and handed it to the cabbie never releasing her from his hungry gaze.

He held her close to his side as they maneuvered past her doorman, down the hallway and finally into her apartment. She barely had the door closed before he had her back pressed against it and his lips on her neck working slowly on her most sensitive area, which she happened to mention earlier in the evening.

She pulled his face back up to hers and caught his smirk before capturing his lips against hers in a fury. One hand held her close, the length of her pressed against him while the other slid its way down her body and over her soft curve towards her sensitive nipple. He stroked it through the thin fabric of her dress eliciting a soft moan from her and a jolt of heat to her core.  

She pulled at his tie and he unzipped the back of her dress. She ripped open his shirt, buttons flying everywhere and he slid her dress down from her body.

He dropped back slightly still holding her hand admiring her body in the thinly veiled scraps of lace that remained reverently. “God you’re gorgeous.” She smiled and pulled him back to her capturing his lips and kissing him sensually as she worked on his belt helping him slide out of his pants. It had been far too long and he was too delicious to stop kissing him.

He slid his hands down the sides of her body hitching her left leg up over his hip giving him access to slide between her thighs and flush against her so that every curve of her body was brushing against him. He could feel the wet heat coming through the silky lace against his hardened length as he pressed into her.

She moaned in his mouth as the friction continued to tease her as his hips rocked forward and back. She wrapped her arms around his neck and rubbed her center against him in sync with his rhythm. He was rock hard and she wanted to feel him, she needed to feel him inside of her. “Bedroom, down on the right.” She breathed out. He wrapped his other arm around her right leg and picked her up from the ground, her legs wrapping around his waist, as he walked her down the hall.

His lips teased at her pert nipple through the lace as he carried her. She continued to lap lightly at his earlobe sucking it into her mouth, panting as he pulled at her senses. He laid her down carefully on the bed huffing out a breath and smiling. She crooked her finger calling him to her as she crawled back up the bed. He did as she requested crawling forward over her stopping slowly at her center and breathing heated breath on her sensitive nub, licking softly on the dampened lace.”God Killian, I need you.”

He peered up smiling and slipped off her panties tossing them onto the floor before wrapping his arms around her thighs and laving at her sensitive folds. She mewled at the contact from his warm tongue against her. The man knew what he was doing, applying slight pressure in her sensitive area at first then slipping in a finger to tease her before laving harder and then softer.”So wet already Darling.”

She laid back and gripped the cotton sheet on the bed as he did his best to pull her into oblivion. She let a sense of calm fall over her as she let the sensations of his warm wet tongue and soft scruff against her sensitive heat drive her crazy. When she didn’t think she could hold out he slipped in a second finger curling them forward sending her over the edge. She felt him laugh in satisfaction as her walls fluttered around his fingers and she closed her eyes letting the waves of euphoria crash over her.

He wiped his chin and climbed up next to her pulling her into his side. She leaned forward kissing him with fervor pushing him back, climbing over him, and straddling his hips. “You are amazing.” He smiled.”I’ve pleased you?” She nodded.”Oh yes, now it’s your turn.”  

She leaned over and pulled a condom from her nightstand laying it on the bed next to him. He had his hands on her hips rocking her back and forth over his hard thick length. She wanted him to feel good too. He’d just given her the best orgasm of her life. She slid back and pulled off his boxers letting his cock free from its cottony confinement.

She looked at him with wide eyes and he grinned. She sent him a saucy wink, took him in her hand and began to pump him slowly working him up.”Feels good.” He relaxed back against the pillows as she leaned forward, licked her lips and swirled her tongue around the tip before taking in his length coating him. He groaned in pleasure as she let him fuck her mouth slowly.

She enjoyed eliciting each moan from him and she also enjoyed teasing him. “Love.” he breathed trying to let her know he was close. She slipped back and pealed open the foil package sliding it over his length. She crawled forward over his body capturing his lips for a sensual kiss as she lined up her tight heat against the tip of his cock. She leaned back pulling him with her as he filled her. She dropped her head back as he held her letting her get used to his size.

She felt amazing, tight hot and wet. “Emma, so good.”  He didn’t know if he was going to last long after the amazing treatment he’d already gotten from her. This was too good to be true. He pulled her forward and pressed wet kisses up her neck to her lips. She straddled him sliding up and down against his hard cock. He felt so good, nearly losing herself when he filled her. It’d been too long since she felt this good. His hands were on her hips lifting her up and down as his lips found her sensitive area again.

She cupped his face pulling his lips back to her and she took control again riding him hard and fast. She cried out when she found the angle that hit her most pleasurable spot. He took control again pushing into her until he felt her fluttering around him finally allowing him to let go too. He breathed her name against her shoulder as he held her tight biting her soft skin lightly. “Emma.”

She hugged his face close to her chest as she breathed against his dampened hair. She pressed a kiss to his crown as she felt him pressing lazy kisses against her breast. She huffed out a breath and pushed him back down onto the soft blankets lying on top of him.

“That was.” He breathed. “I know.” He leaned forward and kissed her forehead smoothing his hand down her back and holding her tight against him. She laughed as she trailed her fingers through the dusting of hair on his chest. “What’s funny Love?”

“It’s just, this isn’t how I expected tonight to go.” He kissed the top of her head again. He couldn’t believe it either. “Better than expected I hope?”  She looked up into his eyes.”Oh yes, way better than expected.” He smiled and raised his eyebrows, clearly ego stroking was in order and definitely appropriate.

His expression changed to one of hopeful.”Will I see you again?”

She quirked an eyebrow and smiled.” Leaving so soon? I haven’t even shown you my best moves yet.”

He laughed.”I hoped but things have been going so well that I didn’t want to push my luck.”

“I was hoping you’d stay and maybe we can figure this out over breakfast tomorrow.”

He pulled her up and kissed the tip of her nose.”I make an excellent omelet.”

She rubbed her nose lightly against his trying to figure out how he was real.”Good.”

He spent the night and the rest of the weekend. Neither of them expected to find the one, as Mary Margaret or David would explain it, but somehow they just fit. He left late Sunday night with the promise to meet her for dinner after work the following day.

When she strolled in wearing her favorite scarf to hide several love bites on her most sensitive spot Mary Margaret was suspicious. Her friend followed her to the coffee station.

“Emma, where have you been? I’ve been trying to reach you all weekend. I have the most amazing news.”

She hummed to herself smiling as she tore open the packet of sugar and poured it into her mug before turning to face her friend’s smiling face.”Let me guess, you finally met the man of your dreams.”

“Yes. He is the one. Oh Emma we laughed the whole time. When I went to find you to let you know the coast was clear you’d already left. David and I spent the whole weekend together. He’s amazing. In fact when I told him about you he mentioned he had a friend that you might like.”

She laughed to herself as she took a sip of her coffee.”Oh did he now?”

“Yes, He had a friend waiting for him to give the all clear signal too.”

She smiled.”What would you say if I told you that you weren’t the only person to meet the man of her dreams in the restaurant that night?”

“No, Killian Jones? Emma really!”

She nodded.”Oh yes and David was right. We are perfect for each other.”

Mary Margaret jumped up and down giggling.”All it took was dating a few booger eating armpit sniffers to find them. Tell me everything!”

She wrapped her arm over her friend’s shoulders and told her all about her weekend, sparing some of the details that were reserved for just her and her new boyfriend. She was still getting used to that title but she wasn’t scared at all, in fact she was looking forward to everything that came with it.

[deojoon]

sky blue : 1

cross posted on ao3

part 2    part 3     part 4    part 5

Summary:

(trigger warning) how namjoon came across always and reflection or how namjoon began to love himself with help ! *this fic isn't for everyone, in no way am i romanticizing mental illnesses or what namjoon went through. if you don't like it dont read it thank you.

Notes:

i'm not gonna lie this straight up was the longest and quickest fic ive ever written. all because i was sad. it didn't turn out the way i wanted it to but its something. i kinda cried while writing it only because i sorta relate ? ion know. even though im a shitty writer you gotta start somewhere enjoy !

Chapter 1

: the beginning

I’ve always wondered how he did it. How Namjoon pieced himself back together. Did bts help ? did army help ? did a friend/significant help ? i’ve always noticed something about rm and it’s wasn’t till recently it got better.

-

It’s was a late night , early 2016, namjoon couldn’t remember the day of the week or date “fuck” he said as he sat in his studio chair looking up at the ceiling. It’s been about 3 days since he locks himself in the studio. This is couple months after his mixtape dropped and when the plagiarism claims had happened. The lowest point of his life.

He checks his phone to see with no surprise to see no new notifications. Namjoon sighed, he stretched his arms and with grogginess, he went back to writing. After even more hours of creativity, Namjoon passes out.

Namjoon woke up to see the time is now 5 am.

He gets up to leave the studio to check on yoongi. No matter what namjoon himself was feeling he thought of everyone else’s well being first. ‘it’s better this way’ he thought.

As he approaches yoongi’s studio he knocks on the door. He hears something crash, he starts to beat on the door calling his name “yoongi please open up”.

After a deep breath yoongi opens up the door breathless “what” he said harshly.

Namjoon walked in already knowing what’s wrong, closed the door and hugged yoongi. “take a deep breath. You’re  okay. You’re  safe.” Yoongi grabs namjoon tightly

Yoongi was upset, he was mad that he was frustrated with himself, that namjoon knows all too well when he’s mad, that namjoon knows how to make him feel better. Yoongi’s grip eventually loosens. Yoongi’s moves closer to namjoon's neck, just to inhale namjoon’s scent to calm himself. It’s a mix of pine, mint, and cotton candy which is surprisingly addictive.

(Not that yoongi would ever tell anyone that.)

With a now calm yoongi, namjoon asks “what were you doing exactly”

Yoongi still in his neck mumbling “producing. It’s not coming out the way I want it to maybe it’s because i’m not capable of making good music”

Namjoon squeezes yoongi tighter. “yoongi no matter what you’re the most creative person i’ve met. Yoongi don’t pay any mind to this small stump.

“but you don’t understand the pressure”

Once yoongi said that it hurt namjoon’s feelings a bit. Brushing it off namjoon replies “ come one let’s go home you need a break”

Yoongi just sighed and nodded, knowing arguing with namjoon at this point wouldn’t get him anywhere.

They left and went to the dorms. As they walked in seokjin was in the kitchen grabbing food for himself. Like a deer caught in headlights, seokjin jumped and dropped his leftover chicken.

“well there you are yoongi I was looking for you. When you feel better can you fix the bookshelf. Someone broke it” seokjin said glaring at namjoon.

Namjoon sheepishly smiles and rubbed the back of his neck. “sorry”

Yoongi had enough and grumbled “ stop breaking shit i’m tired of fixing it” he stomped away.

Namjoon’s sheepish grin dropped “ i’m going to bed”

As he walked to his shared room with taehyung he began to think about the inconvenience he caused other the members. He sighed and went to bed.

-

It’s now a Monday on their one month break. While everyone else is out having fun namjoon is stuck inside. its seems like everyone made plans without him yet again.   It’s been like this for the last week. No human interaction, so he decided to call jackson to see if he wanted to hang out.

But of course, jackson was busy. Namjoon started to feel antsy. He started to scroll on twitter. Maybe seeing army will make him feel better. Namjoon felt worse after reading comments about how ugly and untalented he is. His mood worsened more and more.

When namjoon heard the door open he knew the rest of the members came back he quickly put his emotions in the back of his head. And walking into the living about to say something only to hear his members making fun of his singing as they listened to the song  “adrift”

“he sounds like he’s dying”

“is he gargling a box of nails”

He had enough and went into the bathroom.

He sat down against the wall and stared at himself in the mirror.

‘why am I here’

‘I can’t even write good music without copying someone’

Namjoon shook his head and realized someone was knocking on the bathroom door. He got up and washed his face to see an angry taehyung.

“Finally, do you know how long I was knocking. Get out so I can go in”

Namjoon thought taehyung was concerned for him at first so he smiled but dropped it when he finished.

Namjoon went to his room grabbed his phone, laptop, and wallet and walked out the dorm ignoring everyone’s laughter.

-

He arrived at his studio locked the door and decided to read on naver thinking the news would make him feel better and distract him. Namjoon ended up reading two articles one about him plagiarizing and the other on how much weight he gained, how fat he is now.

Namjoon was at his breaking point but the one last thing that pushed him over was his parents texting him that they’re on vacation without him.

Namjoon began writing full of tears and sadness.

One morning, I opened my eyes And wished that I was dead I wish someone killed me In this noisy silence I live to understand the world But the world didn’t once understand me, why No, the other half is missing* It’s trying to hurt me I miss me miss me, baby, I miss me miss me baby I wish me I wish me baby Wish I could choose me

Why is it that I’m being so earnest Yet it’s not working out Always Always Always Always Always (I lost my all ways) Always (I lost my all ways) Always (I lost my all ways) Always (I lost my all ways)

If I ever meet God, I would tell him this That life is coffee that I never ordered I would grab him by the collar and tell him Death is an americano you can’t refill Are you sure that you’re alive Then, let’s prove it somehow When I exhale, there’s breath** On the window, there’s condensation You are dead You are dad, but you are dead Dead dad you don’t listen to me Dad please listen to me

Why is it that I’m being so earnest Yet it’s not working out Always Always Always Always Always (I lost my all ways) Always (I lost my all ways) Always (I lost my all ways) Always (I lost my all ways)

-

After writing, the group's manager called him to explain the wings photo shoot and due date for the music.

After the long and exhausting meeting, he went back to the dorms to tell everyone the schedule and he got nothing but complaints.

“why couldn’t you pushback the date”

“all ways make things hard for us”

“ya I really don’t appreciate his at all”

“why’d you make our schedule so intense”

Namjoon ran out the dorm slamming the door.

-

Namjoon goes back into the studio and just stares at the wall, thinking about the stupid voice in his head repeatedly saying he doesn’t matter and wrote reflection.

I know Every life’s a movie We got different stars and stories We got different nights and mornings Our scenarios ain’t just boring I find this movie very amusing Everyday, I want to shoot it well I want to caress myself I want to caress myself

But you know, sometimes I really really hate myself To be honest, quite often, I really hate myself When I really hate myself, I go to Dduksum I just stand there with the familiar darkness

With the people that are smiling And beer, which makes me smile Coming to me softly, Fear, which holds my hand It’s okay because everyone is in twos or threes It’d be nice if I had friends too

The world is just another name for despair My height is just another diameter for the earth I am all of my joy and anxiety It repeats everyday, the love and hate directed to me Hey you, who’s looking over the Han River If we bump into each other while passing, would it be fate? Or maybe we bumped into each other in our past life Maybe we bumped into each other countless times

In the darkness, People look happier than the day Everyone else knows where they’re supposed to be But only I walk without purpose But still, blending in with them is more comfortable Dduksum, which has swallowed up the night Hands me an entirely different world I want to be free I want to be free from freedom Because right now I’m happy but I’m unhappy I’m looking at myself At Dduksum

I wish I could love myself I wish I could love myself I wish I could love myself I wish I could love myself I wish I could love myself I wish I could love myself I wish I could love myself I wish I could love myself

-

Namjoon now lying on his studio floor hear knocking on his door. He ignores it and goes back to sleep.

'why do they even bother with me'

[heebiejbies]

Deranged

Deranged Mini-Masterlist

Characters: EXO

Warnings: Some vulgar language, and mentions of many forms of abuse, suicide, mental health issues, etc.

Word Count: 6.2k

The sound of my heels clicking against the floor echoed throughout the halls. I had an iPad in hand, as well as a cup of coffee and a Minella file. The building my office is in isn’t part of the actual hospital, rather a sister-building located relatively near the hospital. It housed mainly specialists, and also therapists such as myself. I entered the floor my office is on, saying good morning to a passing doctor I was surprised to see.  The other good part of this building is that it isn’t crowded in the least, especially around where my office is. My office is off by itself down a short hallway. You wouldn’t come down that way unless you were coming to my office, that’s one of the things I liked about it. My patients like the privacy, they liked that they knew only the two of us were around to hear.

A man named Suho is my most avid patient. On his good days, he had this motherly vibe to him. He always worried about everyone else when he’s the one he should be worried about. I met him around two weeks after being here. He was admitted to the main hospital when I first met him, he has since then been released but he still comes to see me quite often. While staying in the hospital for his three months, he saw countless therapists but none of them had even gotten him to look at them. After many therapists failed, they brought him to me. It took a few days, but I finally cracked into his shell.

“Suho, I’m not going to question why you won’t speak to me, but I want you to know one thing. Anything that you tell me that you don’t want anyone else to know, I won’t tell anyone,” I laid my iPad on the table in front of him, “Everything will be off the record if you’d like.”

“Why am I here?” He had his eyes trained on the painting I had hanging on the wall—The Scream by Edvard Munch.

“You’re here because it’s not healthy to bottle up everything you’re thinking and feeling. I’m an unbiased ear that you can count on to listen to anything you have to say. Do you know what this painting is called?” He shook his head no. “They call this painting ‘The Scream’. This is one of my favorite paintings in the world, it has such a… Horrifically beautiful message to it.”

I could feel his eyes on me, I turned to meet his confused gaze. “Everyone has their own interpretation of this painting. What I see, though, is this.” I walked over to the painting and grabbed it off of the wall. I sat beside him on the couch and placed the painting on the table in front of us.  “I see a sunset. An absolutely breathtaking sunset. The two figures in the background, I see two people walking along and enjoying such a beautiful sight. Then, there is this person,” I pointed to the main focus of the painting, “What do you think they are doing?”

“They are screaming.”

“Yes, they are screaming. Upon first glance, I wondered ‘Why is this person screaming in such a beautiful place, on what seems to be such a peaceful day?’ I thought about it, and I came to this conclusion. My interpretation of this painting is that even when the outside is seemingly perfect and peaceful, beautiful and astounding, you yourself can still be in an ugly place. The internal struggles of man have far more of an impact on themselves than any external struggle. You can be in a utopia on the outside and be in Hell on the inside. It shows such a real look at how the world is, but it does it in an almost poetic way. Hence, horrifically beautiful.”

His eyes remained focused on the painting, he didn’t speak a word. “How do you interpret this photo, Suho?”

“Good morning, (Y/N). How was your weekend?” I entered my office to see Suho already sitting in his usual spot. He had his legs crossed and his hands clasped together in his lap. I sat my things down on my desk and sat in the chair across from him.

“My weekend was alright. I finished up some housework I have been meaning to do for weeks. It’s a little early for you to be here, isn’t it?” I looked at my watch to see that it was 8:04 a.m. “Maybe you should eat breakfast and then come back?”

“No! I-” He exclaimed, then regained his composure, “I have to talk to you now. I woke up this morning and I saw these,” He lifted his sleeves to show that he had scratches going up both of his arms, “I didn’t do this to myself… I don’t know how they got here. How did they get here?”

“I’m not sure, Suho.”

He started chuckling, but it wasn’t a happy chuckle. It was one filled with sorrow and anxiety. “I wake up with all these injuries and I have no idea how I get them. The woman I met when I was taken to the hospital those months ago told me that I injured myself, but wouldn’t I remember that? Why wouldn’t I remember something I did?! I told her it wasn’t me but she insisted! She kept saying that I shouldn’t lie to myself! How can I lie to myself when I KNOW I DIDN’T DO IT?!” He had curled up in a ball on the floor in front of the couch. He had his head nestled between his knees and his hands over his head. I knew that to try and speak to him after he had an outburst wouldn’t help, so I decided to go grab him something for breakfast. “Suho, I will let you have a moment to yourself. I will go get you breakfast, does that sound alright?” He nodded his head, and I exited the room quietly.

“Good morning, Dr. (L/N). I wondered where you went off too this early in the morning.” I recognized that even toned voice immediately.

“Ah, D.O. It’s lovely to see you again. Where did Suho go?”

“He’s still very tired, so I let him go rest.”

“I see,” I shifted in my seat slightly, “Well, D.O., do you know what happened to Suho? I understand that you know quite a lot.” D.O. was the only one out of the other five that didn’t need to take the time to warm up to me. He was an observer, he knew and saw everything and he was never reluctant to tell me.

“It was Kai,” He explained, “Suho was asleep, and Kai did it in the middle of the night. I stopped him before he could do anything worse, but he still did some damage. It’s almost like he knew Suho wouldn’t remember that he did it. Of course, he doesn’t remember a lot of the things Kai has done to him, but he doesn’t remember as much as I thought he would.” The day Suho had been admitted to the hospital, he was brought in with both of his wrists slit, and they also found many untreated cuts on his abdomen and legs that they had to treat.

“This is getting out of control. This is the third time this has happened this month. He can’t keep doing this to Suho,” I removed my glasses to rub my eyes, “I think I should speak to him.”

“I’m not sure that is a very good idea. Speaking with him has never done any good for any of us.”

“D.O., please. I know he doesn’t like listening to me, but I have to say something. He needs to understand that hurting Suho won’t help anything.”

It wasn’t until a week later when I finally met with Kai. I knew it was him from the moment he entered my office, he had this overpowering aura to him—and not a very nice one at that.

“I heard you wanted to speak to me, Doc. What do you want?”

“To the point as always, Kai, I should have expected. Sit, please.” Instead of sitting on the couch, he came and sat in the chair in front of my desk, I wasted no time, “You and I both know that you are the most capable and qualified to protect Suho, you’re strong and powerful and that is something to be proud of. You only want to help make Suho stronger, that’s understandable, but I think it has gotten to the point where it is no longer helping him.”

“You don’t know anything about Suho! Don’t say that!” He exclaimed. Despite his rage, he seemed to be keeping his anger calmer than usual, which was a good thing for me.

“Do you remember when you hurt Suho that night, and the doctors stitched him up and performed a blood transfusion on him? Didn’t that make you angry? Angry that they were fixing him up when you only did that to try and help him?” He nodded his head. “Well, when you are feeling the urge to inflict pain, maybe you could dance? You mentioned how you like dancing before.” Kai’s reasoning behind hurting Suho wasn't the most logical. Actually, they weren’t logical at all. They were twisted and disturbing, but in the end, all Kai wanted was to protect Suho and make him stronger. He just had the wrong ways in mind to do so.  

“Kai, you’ve been helping Suho so much since we started our sessions. I’ve noticed immense improvement, and that is thanks to you. I know that you protect him the best, even better than Chanyeol does. However, don’t you think it’s time to try a different approach to protecting him? You’ve done wonders with your current method, a new one could help him greatly.” I had to be careful with how I spoke to Kai. Any little thing could set him off, if I undermined his thoughts that he is helping Suho in any way, he wouldn’t be too happy. I knew that Kai hurting Suho wasn’t helping, but Kai couldn’t realize that and part of my job was to make him see that his way of ‘protecting’ Suho wasn’t actually protecting him.

“I’ll catch you later, Doc.” With that, Kai stood up and hurried over to the door, “You only want what’s best for him, don’t you?”

“And you too, Kai, I want what’s best for all of you.” He hadn’t expected that reaction, so he simply twisted the doorknob and exited the room. I grabbed Kai’s file where I collected information from our sessions and grabbed a pen to write something down in it.

“Potential breakthrough today, I think he may be finally starting to realize that causing pain to Suho won’t actually help him and make him stronger like he thinks it will.” 

During lunch, I grabbed something to-go from a nearby restaurant and headed back to my office. I grabbed my keys to unlock my office when I felt someone hug me tightly from behind, “Hello Ms. (L/N)!” I unlocked the door and let myself and this person in. They still had their arms wrapped around me and had their cheek pressed to my back, “I missed you! Did you miss me?!” They questioned.

“Of course I missed you, Baekhyun, we haven’t seen one another in quite some time. How have you been?” The boy led me over to my couch and pushed me to sit on it. He laid down beside me and rested his head in my lap.

“I’ve been good. Kai has been really mean lately, Yeollie sticks up for me though!” He didn’t waste time before jumping to the next subject, “Next week is my birthday! I’m going to finally be 7, can you believe that Ms. (L/N)?” He sat up and moved so he was sitting in my lap, his back facing me. I ruffled his hair, “You’re becoming a big boy, Baekhyun. I’m so proud of how you’ve grown since I met you.” When I first met Baekhyun, he wouldn’t speak to me. He actually sat in the corner with his knees to his chest and remained quiet the entire time. When he finally came out of his shell, I found that he was this super energetic, happy, and loving person.

He and Chanyeol were a lot alike once they warmed up to me. Chanyeol, he was very hostile towards me during our first few sessions—much like Kai actually.

“When are you going to understand that none of us need you?” He flung a stack of papers off of my desk and into the floor, “Especially Suho, he doesn’t need you at all!”

That went on for three weeks, three weeks until he finally calmed down and realized that I wasn’t a threat.

“Something is wrong with Suho… And I can’t fix it.” He caught me just before I left for lunch that day, actually barging in right before I opened my door to leave. “He wants physical comfort. Not from any of us, from someone else. Please, at least give him a hug so he can feel better. He’s having a bad today and I can’t fix it.”

Just like he asked, I gave Suho a hug that day. Suho didn’t know why I hugged him, but he thanked me for doing it nonetheless. The next day Chanyeol also thanked me, that was the day where he became one of my allies and next to D.O., was the most helpful when it came to things involving Suho.

When I came back from my memory, I realized that Baekhyun was still on my lap. However, when I opened my eyes it was not Baekhyun that was on my lap. I had no idea who this person was.

“I’ve never expected to be in such a suggestive position with a woman as attractive as you.” He turned around on my lap, his hands going to my hair to play with it, “So, so pretty~” I moved away from him as best as I could, leaving him to plop down on the couch in my place, “Oh come on, don’t play hard to get. I know you want me, I’m irresistible.”

“Who are you?”

“My name is Jongdae, Kim Jongdae. Everyone calls me Chen, but you can call me whenever and whatever your pretty little mouth desires.” He stood up from the couch and strutted over to my desk where I had sat down to get away from him. Before I could get up from my seat, he trapped me in the chair with his arms. He leaned towards my face and blew against my ear, “Come on, just one quick fuck. That’s what everyone wants from me. I’m here to fulfill your wishes.” Then, he grabbed my jaw with his right hand and attempted to pull my face towards his for a kiss.

“No! Chen, you shouldn’t be doing this!” I managed to push my chair back and rushed to my feet to get away from him. He looked at me with a somber expression, as if I had just told him a family member had died. “It’s because I’m repulsive and ugly, right?”

“Excuse me?” Ugly? Repulsive? What did he mean by that question?

“No, I understand. You’re a beautiful woman, and you don’t want an ugly, disgusting sex toy such as myself… I’m sorry I’m not up to your expectations.” He sat back down on the couch with a humph. “If I was Suho, would you want me then?”

Wait. Sex toy? Don’t tell me… He can’t be.

“Why would you ask such a question, Chen?”

“He likes you. You’re his therapist but he likes you, you’re the only person besides us that doesn’t treat him like a deranged freak. You like him too, don’t you? That’s why you’re so interested in him, isn’t it?”

“No, I am interested in you all equally. I just see him the most out of you six—well, seven now that I have met you.”

I only knew of six, but where did Chen come from? Why did he only show up now?

Chen started to giggle, “Seven? No no, there are twelve of us!”

“T-twelve?”

“Mhm! You’ve met Suho, Chanyeol, Kai, D.O., Baekhyun, Sehun, and myself. I won’t tell you about the other five just yet, I want you to be surprised!” He hopped up from his seat and ran over to me and kissed me on the cheek, “I have to go now! I will see you soon, beautiful!”

Twelve? I’ve only known of seven… Where have the other five been all of this time? I need to talk to someone. I need to talk to D.O.

D.O. didn’t show up until two days later. When he did, I immediately bombarded him with questions about this Chen individual and the unknown other five. “D.O., I met Chen the other day. However, meeting him wasn’t what confused me. He said there twelve of you, and including Chen, I’ve only met seven. Who and where are the other five?”

“Oh, you met Chen? I am sorry for his behavior, he’s been like that ever since he showed up. As for your other question, yes there are twelve of us. The five that you haven’t met yet are Kris, Lay, Luhan, Tao, and Xiumin.”

I asked D.O. to leave out any information about these other five until I met them for myself and had the opportunity to speak to them. A few days later, I met both Lay and Xiumin on the same day.

I should have known that my office door being unlocked meant something was off. When I opened my door, I found another new person in my office. This time, however, he held a letter opener of mine to his throat.

“Good morning, sir. Did you come here to talk? If so, we can sit on the couch together and talk. You can talk and I’ll listen, or I can talk and you listen, or we both could talk or listen. You just need to put the letter opener down beforehand.” I didn’t want to freak out over what he was doing, that would only make him freak out even more. I knew I had to be calm for his well-being.

“No!” He had tears spilling down his cheeks instantly, “I want to do this! It’s something I need to do. There’s no point in living anymore when all I see is nothing but darkness!” His hand that held the letter opener started to shake. “They won’t miss me when I’m gone! They’ll be happy that I am gone!”

I wonder which one of the five he is.

“Listen, sweetheart, they would be devastated if you were gone. You may not be able to see it, but they each love and care deeply for you. We’ve only just met, and I would be devastated if you were gone.”

“You don’t even know me!”

“You’re right, I don’t know you. But I really would love getting to know you if you would let me.” I gave him a sincere smile, the hand that held the letter opener began to shake even more, “Do you really mean that?” He asked.

I nodded my head, “Truly I do. It would be an honor to get to know you.” As his grip wavered, I slowly approached him. Once he had dropped the letter opener, I kicked it away with my foot and hugged him. “Come, let’s sit.”

He told me that his name was Zhang Yixing, but the others called him Lay. He also talked about the Xiumin individual, saying that sometimes it only felt as if Xiumin cared for him and wanted him. He went on to say that he believed himself to be a burden to Xiumin, I had to reassure him that he wasn’t and would never be a burden to anyone. He cried quite a bit during our session, so I decided that I needed to get him a bottle of water.

They seem to have a habit of one leaving and another showing up when I leave the room because when I came back Lay was no longer in the room. Instead, it was who I now know to be Xiumin.

“Hello…?” He sat watching the door as if he were waiting for me to return.

“Hello, Doctor.  You have yet to meet me. My name is Kim Minseok, but you can call me Xiumin. I won’t be long, but I just want to thank you for taking care of him. Lay is such a soft hearted person, he’s just too emotionally damaged and sometimes that gets to him. I try to take care of him as much as I can, but sometimes that is all I can do—try. I’d also like to thank you for caring for Suho. I’m glad he has someone in his life that cares, other than us of course.

“It’s my job, Xiumin. You are all very interesting people, I hope you all know how much I care for each and every one of you,” I explained. Xiumin informed me that he was the one who liked to watch over everyone and try and take care of them all as best as he could, especially Suho, Lay, and Baekhyun—although Xiumin did say Chanyeol takes care of Baekhyun rather well.

He also let me know that he wouldn’t visit much, saying he preferred to stay in the shadows and observe, only showing up when needed. He let me know the ages of himself, Chen, and Lay as well. He said, “I’m the eldest out of us. Lay and Suho only being one year younger than me, though. Chen is a year younger than them.”

“I’m sorry to have disturbed you, Doctor,” He yawned, “I had some free time so I thought I should come thank you personally. I hope you don’t mind.” I noticed that he looked rather exhausted the entire time we spoke. I even asked him if he was in need of sleep, to which he replied, “No, now is not the time for sleep. I can sleep later,  I still have things I must take care of.” Attempting to take care of all of them must be very tiring, and he did seem to have poor self-care as well. He could feel how exhausted he was, but he still put everyone before himself. Xiumin reminded me much of Suho, in the aspect that he wants to take care of everyone. I made a note to try and convince Xiumin to take better care of himself the next time we spoke, whenever that would be.

“I’m surprised Xiumin showed himself, he usually likes to stay hidden. As for Lay, tsk. I kept him suppressed up until that day, he somehow slipped through the cracks.”

“Yes, D.O., you’ve said that three times in the past ten minutes. You told me about both of them and Chen. I’m asking about the other three. Who are they and why have I not met them yet?” It had been three weeks since meeting Xiumin and Lay, so I decided to ask why they haven’t shown up yet. However, I was not prepared for what D.O. told me next.

“Well, I’ll tell you the names of the three remaining ones. Huang Zitao, he goes by Tao. Lu Han, he goes by Luhan. Then there is Wu Yifan, he goes by Kris. The reason you haven’t met them yet is, well,” He took a deep breath in, “They’re dead.”

“P-pardon?” Dead? How could that be possible?

“Yes, Dr. (L/N), dead. They all three died, it’s tragic really… They were part of the family.”

Dead. That’s impossible. There’s no way, is Suho’s case even more complex than I thought?

I opened my filing cabinet and took out Suho’s file.

Kim Junmyeon: Alias is Suho. Age 26.

Admitted to Hospital: May 23rd, 2016 at 5:52 a.m.

Diagnosis: Dissociative Identity Disorder

History: Abused both physically, sexually, and emotionally by his parents up until 21 years of age. Lived with his younger brother for 2 years, then alone for two more years until admission to hospital. Admitted the night of his 25th birthday after having his wrists slit at the hands of Kai (see Kim Jongin.) Since being released, lives on his own again and has had no serious incidents to report.

List of known alters:

Byun Baekhyun - Little aka child alter. 6 years of age. The innocent part of Suho. Only has memories of a happy childhood thus far. Looks up to Chanyeol as a big brother.

Do Kungsoo - Alias is D.O. Internal Self-Helper alter. Age 24. The first alter to show himself during sessions. Remembers all of Suho’s experiences and tries to suppress his abuse from him. The only alter that can control Kai.

Kim Jongin - Alias is Kai. Persecutor alter. Age 23. Took over Suho on the night of admission and slit his wrists. When asked the reasoning behind his actions, he merely replied, “The more I hurt him, the stronger he will be and the less likely he is to be hurt.”

Oh Sehun - Introject alter. Age 23. Molded after his real life little brother Sehun, who died at the age of 20. After losing his brother, the introject alter appeared as a standin. Alter is not aware that he is not the real Sehun, nor that the real Sehun is dead.

Park Chanyeol - Protector Alter. Age 25. Protects all other alters as well as Suho. Very close with the child alter Baekhyun. First alter to introduce himself to Suho. Took much of the physical abuse for Suho after appearing to him.

I flipped to a new page to add these newly discovered alters to his file.

Kim Jongdae - Alias is Chen. Sexual alter. Age 25. Likely created to deal with the years of sexual abuse. Very low self esteem. Craves sex and sees himself as nothing but a sex toy. Further sessions needed to understand more.

Kim Minseok - Alias is Xiumin. Caretaker alter. Age 27. Eldest of all the alters. Cares for the alters as well as Suho himself. Very poor self-care mannerisms, exhaustion is common. Not expected to show up often, but further sessions are still needed to understand more.

Zhang Yixing - Alias is Lay. Suicide Alter. Age 26. Sees no point in living. Suicial tendancies should be common. Needs to be closely monitored at all times, even when not in control. Unaware that he shares the same body with Suho. Had been suppressed by D.O. up until point of contact. Further sessions needed to understand more.

Huang Zitao, Lu Han, and Wu Yifan - Aliases are Tao, Luhan, and Kris. Ages unknown. Possible dead alters?

What caused their deaths?

Of course, I knew alters couldn’t just die, seeing as both Suho and his brain were still alive. What I didn’t know, though, is what happened to them to make them think they were dead. Whatever it was, all the other alters believed them to be dead as well. Suho had never really brought them up, but with this newly learned information, I knew I had to ask Suho about them. He should know the alters in his system better than anyone else.  

“Suho, if you don’t have a problem with it, can you tell me about everyone in your system?”

“Well, the first one who introduced himself to me was Chanyeol. When Chanyeol came, a lot of the abuse stopped. He’s one of the ones I’m the most thankful for. The second one was D.O. He’s always helping me whenever I’m dealing with things, he helps me through things like when Kai gets hateful towards me. Kai came after D.O., and of course, I am thankful for him as well but I didn’t like it when he hurt me when we first met. I know that he wants to help me be stronger, but sometimes he hurts me as bad as my parents did. He also hurts you, I don’t like that.”

“And why is that?”

“I care about you. You’re the only one who has actually listened to me and tried to help everyone in my system get along with me and one another. You also care about me, you care about my well-being and what happens to me. Kai is thankful for you, even though he doesn’t show it with how he lashes out like he does.”

“How about Baekhyun?”

“Baekhyun, yes! He’s a sweet child. He’s the type of kid I wish I could have been. He’s so innocent, energetic, and full of love. He’s so hopeful for the future and he’s one of the most optimistic people I’ve ever met. He likes you a lot too, he is always in a good mood after he sees you. I’m glad you take care of him well.”

“He reminds me much of a little brother, honestly. Speaking of little brothers, how about Sehun?”

“The real Sehun… I miss him so much. He was the only one keeping me sane in that house. It’s funny, I used to envy him because our parents never even laid a hand on him. He always stood up for me, it didn’t do any good but it still makes me smile thinking about how much he loved me. The Sehun in my system makes it easier when I miss him, of course, he’s not the same but he’s very very close. He doesn’t know he isn’t the real Sehun, but I nor any of the others have the heart to break the truth to him.”

“I see, I see. Suho, how about Xiumin? Or Lay or Chen?”

“So you did meet them?”

“Recently really, but yes I met them.”

“I’m sorry about Chen… He’s like that most of the time, but he isn’t like that on purpose. He just can’t help it. I hope you’re not angry at him for probably trying to seduce you.”

“I would never be angry at anyone in your system, they each have their own specific purpose there. They may just be steered in the wrong direction, but none of them are bad.”

“You’re so understanding, (Y/N). Such a sweet person… Xiumin visited you said? He doesn’t come out of his hiding spot most of the time, I’m surprised. He takes care of all of us, especially Lay. Lay doesn’t know he’s part of my system, he thinks he’s in a different body. That’s why he thinks that if he kills himself, it won’t hurt any of us. If he does kill himself, though, he will kill all of us. Most of us have tried to talk to him, but he just doesn’t listen. He rarely even calms down when Xiumin is with him.”

“Really? Well, when I met him I got him to calm down long enough to tell me about himself and his thoughts.”

“Did you? Wow… You really are amazing. Maybe that’s why he hasn’t been as upset as he usually is. What exactly did you say to him? If I may ask of course.”

“I simply let him know that I would love to get to know him, and I was speaking the truth. It’s tragic, really, he doesn’t think there is a point in living nor that there is good in this world. I’m hoping he visits more, I’d like to show him that there is a point in living and that there are good things and good people in this world.

Anyway, what about the remaining three? I think their names are Kris, Luhan, and-”

“Tao, yes. They’re not in my system anymore. They’ve, well, passed on.”

“Suho, dear, you do understand that as long as you’re alive none of your alters can die right? If you and your brain are still living, they still live.”

“Ah, right…”

Did he really think that they were dead, just like D.O. did? Why do they think they are dead? Do the alters themselves also think that they are dead? Who do I even ask about them? D.O.? Xiumin? Chanyeol? They all think they’re dead, who do I ask? Aish, this is so confusing!

“What did we do to deserve you? You’re such a pure person, you’re my—our savior.”

“It’s what I’m here for, Suho. I’m here for you all, and I mean that.” Seeing how he lit up when I placed my hand on his, I could tell that despite all of the questions this session, it made him happy to be speaking with me. My mind thought back to what Chen told me the day that I met him.

“He likes you. You’re his therapist but he likes you, you’re the only person besides us that doesn’t treat him like a deranged freak.”

Should I believe him? I see no reason for him to lie about that, but is it true? If it is, wouldn’t D.O. tell me about it? I have to ask him, if not for Suho’s sanity then for my own.

“You’re seeing a lot of me lately, Dr. (L/N). You don’t seem to mind, though. Tell me, do you still have lots of questions for me?” He rested his elbows on my desk and leaned forward. He had a small smirk upon his lips, almost as if he knew what I was going to ask.

D.O. knows and sees everything, of course he probably knows.

“Yes, of course, I do. I’m the therapist yet it seems you know more about him than I do these days. When I met Chen that day, he told me something interesting. Now, I don’t know if that was his way of joking or if he actually meant it. However, I do know that you know Suho probably the best. Does Suho like me? Like me as in more than a doctor-patient relationship?”

The smirk became even wider, “Oh is that what Chen told you? Ah that troll, of course he’d let things like that slide.” He turned his head to the side as if he were talking to another alter in Suho’s system. “To be blunt with you, he hasn’t spoken of you much in that way. However, I do believe he likes you. I’m not sure the amount, but I personally think he does.”

After D.O. left and I didn’t think any of them would come visit me, I took out my journal and started writing.

Could Suho really like me? It isn’t uncommon for patients with Dissociative Identity Disorder to develop crushes or have a love life, but with these three allegedly dead alters I’m afraid that his case is a lot more complicated than I originally anticipated. What I need to focus on now is awakening these dead alters, but what parts of Suho do they hold? What roles do they play in his system? How will the other alters and Suho react to me trying to awaken them?

At the sound of my door opening, I quickly shut my journal and put it back in the drawer it came from. He walked to the couch and sat down, not paying any attention to me it seemed. Suho, but is it him or someone in his system? Usually, Suho greets me when he comes in my office.

I stood up from my desk and approached him. I still couldn’t tell who it was, usually, they all had such notable things to let me know who was in control at that moment. He was too apathetic, too unemotive, I became confused as to what was going on. I sat down beside him and studied him even closer in hopes to figure out who it was.

“I’m sorry… I just… I want a hug. No, I need a hug. Lately, I feel... Different. I don’t know what my emotions are doing, I’m so lost at this point. (Y/N), I’m not sure what’s going on.” He sighed.

Suho.

I moved closer to him and hugged him, letting him rest his head against my shoulder. Suho gets comforted by hugs, something about being hugged helps relax him. If that was him or the influence of another alter, I still have yet to find out. Regardless, I was always happy to oblige.

“(Y/N), it’s late. Don’t you want to go home and get some rest? You shouldn’t work so hard.” Little did he know, I wouldn’t be able to rest at all. Not until I had all of my questions answered.

“I’m perfectly fine being here with you, you need me right now and that’s all that matters.”

We sat in silence like that for God knows how long. When he visits, we usually talk quite a lot. This time, though, not a word was uttered after that. His mind was seemingly elsewhere at that moment.

Suho… Just what is going on in your head? You’re still surprising me almost a year later of knowing you. I’m going to help you if it’s the last thing I do. Even if I have to devote every hour of my life to you. You deserve that much.

Author’s Note: I have no idea what this is omg. I may make individual parts for each of the different members/alters, depending on the feedback from this. If I don’t delete it lmao.