#but it really feels like the PLAN is/was for 102 to graduate and for us to have one more year with new members

[sleazebouquet]

honestly that detail about the teaset makes me really certain we will be getting new kohai

HASUNOSORA TRADITION LORE DROP 💥💥💥

when the performing arts club just started they were only allowed to wear their uniforms. a member who was good at sewing made outfits for the whole club for a school festival but the school did not approve. eventually it was decided that if the live was not a success the school would never approve of the outfits. of course, the live was a success

one of the outfit designs made over the years was hasunodon. that is, kaiju kigurumi, made by mirakura park

the sewing machine in the clubroom is thirty years old

the gramophone in the clubroom was one of the only items the school had for musical education when it was first founded. even now its a museum quality antique

the acoustic guitar kozue uses to compose is fifty years old. its parts have been replaced and not many original parts remain but its still full of memories from the past

the school idol notebooks are the precious records left behind by their senpai. when they first began being used they were originally only for the club president to log daily activities but over time its become that anyone can write in them as they like. kaho likes reading them

the tea set in the clubroom was originally kozue's but she's donated it to the club, and she's happy that they'll continue using it after she's graduated

sugao no pixel was written shortly after the performing arts club became the school idol club a dozen or so years ago, as a farewell song. separate club members were responsible for the music and the lyrics. it seems the lyricist's hobby was photography, and she took photos of club activities and recorded them as memories. however, the composer decided to leave hasunosora due to certain circumstances, and the lyricist sent her friend a large number of her photos and a letter filled with her gratitude and sadness of their parting. she finished the song with her unit based on sentences from the letter, and that song became sugao no pixel

[iznsfw]

Any plans for Eunbi smut? Or Kkura? Or Hyewon?? Lots of love for iznsfw! ❤️❤️❤️

Mon Chef-D'oeuvre

IZ Days of Christmas: Day 3 - Kang Hyewon

IZ*ONE's Kang Hyewon x Male Reader Smut

4235 words

Categories: biography-style fic, muse!Hyewon, haunted_artist!Reader, cunnilingus, cockwarming, riding

T/W: suicide, cancer/sickness, self-deprecating thoughts

The smut parts are quite short, but I was leaning on a more emotional side of the story, so I apologize if it is not fulfilling.

MASTERPIECE AND MADNESS: A LOOK INTO THE LIFE OF KANG SEUNGWOON, THE MOURNFUL ARTIST

Excerpts from page 99-102

[...] Grief was a major theme in Kang’s paintings. In Secret Story of the Swan (figure 5.5), created in 1916 hung in the Louvre in 1920, he takes a twist on the classic children’s story of The Ugly Duckling. He depicts the mother of the duckling as a rejected, brutalized victim at the hands of her husband. When asked about how he took the harsh criticism from the public for this controversial artwork by the Korea Times, he stated: “There is no right or wrong way to tell a story [...] it is fiction, it does not matter. All of life is a fictional construct. I say the world was simply not prepared for it.”

He presented this artwork in muted colors as he did not have formal materials until his graduation from the Iz School of Creative Art in November 1917. But it is safe to say the painting presented the emotions as much as any vibrant colors could, although it was met by praise and critical acclaim as late as the birth of the twenty-first century.

Another artwork of his in the category of grief is Winter Poem (see Figure 5.6), made shortly after his muse and wife, Kang Hyewon, passed.

Kang first met her at the university from which he took art and graduated at the top of the class. She was described as an “innocent girl with a pure face”. Quoted from Kang from his journals, which were released to the public in 2014: “She had the beauty of an angel. I think she really was an angel. I felt that I did not deserve her.”

-

You graduated at the top of your class, with honors and awards for everything you have ever painted in school. They hung your artworks around and gladly presented them to the wealthy visitors looking to enroll their children in there, as if to say, "This is what your child can make if you enter them in our school." They all saw you as the best painter in class, the one with instinctive and natural talent that comes to you as easily as the wind.

So, why are you so sad?

The joy of these moments have lost their effect on you. Maybe it is because you are growing up. As one grows up, things slowly lose meaning. Birthdays are not as exciting as they used to be, and even if the events were big things such as this: your graduation, not one smile paints itself on your sullen face.

Your mother once told you that all things were temporary. “Gifts, birthdays, parties…” she had listed out for you the examples thoughtfully. “They’re all temporary just like we are. So you have to enjoy them while you can.” But you cannot take her advice, and now, you feel as if you have disappointed her.

The tears drop despite your efforts to remain a stoic face. But what is done is done. All you have to do is to go home with your diploma in hand, and probably encase it with glass. It will be a good thing to add to your resume as well as the credentials you list when people commission you. If, and only if, there is a slim possibility anyone would want you to make them something. You have never been the best artist out there, although you have strived to be.

“Seungwoon-ah!” Turn to the direction you hear the yell from to meet the happy face of Choi Yena. She is one of your fellow honor graduates. Her smile is wide as she asks you, “Are you coming to the grad party tonight?”

Choi Yena is a social butterfly. She can make friends with simply the use of her smile, adding to the fact that she is so naturally cheerful. Nothing can get to her. Sometimes, you wish you were born in her shoes, to have the luxury to be so effortlessly happy.

“I’ll pass,” you tell her. She was kind enough to invite you, the weird outcast, but you will have to turn her offer down. You are not good at big events. You either stutter too much or remain without a plus one. You have learned over the years to save yourself from your own embarrassment. “Congratulations, though!”

“You, too!” Yena beams. The anxious part of your heart tells you that the beam is caused by the fact that you are not going. The rational part tells you, of course, the rational side to the story: Yena is a bubbly girl. She will smile at anything, even if you present her the ugliest thing in the world. But you decide to believe the former, anyway. You always do.

You go away from all of the crowds. They are becoming too much for you. Everyone is jumping and screaming as a famous singer takes the stage and sings a song everyone is obsessed over. You recognize the song but cannot remember its title, but you know it is something along the lines of “I’m gonna make it smile, smile, smile away.” Something like that. You would have liked to ponder over it more, but right now, all you want to do is go home. Probably heat a hot chocolate and read a book before sleeping. It’s getting late, anyway.

You turn the curve to go to the parking spaces. Everything is jammed; every brand of vehicle in existence is cramped in the small, ugly space your university reserves for events like these. All the money in the world from profiting off of the tuition fees and they still cannot invest in bigger hectares. How pathetic.

The richer kids own the Ferraris parked cleanly in the corner, while yours is an old truck your dad used to drive around. You yearn for a better car like those; yours is almost broken down due to the engine, and it isn’t exactly a pretty sight. But you mustn’t let your jealousy overtake you. It is a terrible habit not too many people recognize.

And that is when you see her.

You are rarely starstruck. Models come into your classrooms everyday as references for your art. A lot of them enter in the nude, except for underwear. However, none of them had an effect on you like she did.

She is the girl standing near your car, observing its structure and wheels. She is dressed casually, despite the occasion. A lit cigarette hangs from between her full, pink lips. Her arms form two curves near her hips’. And in that moment, you forget all about what you said negatively about love at first sight. You swear you haven’t felt so stupidly in love.

She takes art classes on the side in the summer. She comes there sometimes, and you see her paint dutifully, pencil tucked behind her ear, to produce a pretty artwork. She rarely laughs nor smiles, but when she does, every person in the room is captured by the neck, including you.

She is the most beautiful girl in the world. And she introduces herself to you as Kang Hyewon.

You knew you were done for when you saw that smirk.

-

Kang Hyewon was born in Busan and resided there until she was thirteen years old. From then on, she moved to Seoul and took art classes while pursuing photography at the same university Seungwoon graduated from. They met after his graduation, and began dating casually after two months. Historians doubt this, saying that Seungwoon was a shy man and would have taken longer to charm her, but the journals are concrete evidence that support the widely accepted timeline. They married on 4 July 1922, on Hyewon's twenty-third birthday.

She inspired Seungwoon’s decision to make his first attempt at photography. His first photos consisted of Hyewon herself. According to Dr. Lee’s book on Han Seungwoon and his muses over the years, he “did not see why Hyewon was the photographer rather than the model herself; she was very easy on the eyes.”

Some of Kang’s photographs of Hyewon are shown below:

Contemplation, 1919

A Snack to Go By, 1920

A Camera for the camera, 1922

Seungwoon was not only skilled in painting, but also mathematics, geometry, and science. So it was not long until he had been talented in the field of photography as well. While Hyewon taught him the rules and aspects of it, he gave her advice on her drawings. She inspired and modelled for his one of his last paintings of her: Taste. The story behind the title of the painting or the artwork itself is unknown.

-

She has been your muse from the moment you first saw her.

Of course, the first thing that can be attributed to her being your muse is her undeniable beauty. It is kind of ridiculous how pretty Kang Hyewon is. Her features are soft, yet full: doe eyes, paired with two full lips, and a perfectly shaped nose that can make her look like a lovingly-carved statue if you used your gray paint on her. She looks good in anything you request her to wear, anything she wears when she enters your studio with a new inquiry about art. Any photograph taken of her comes out prettily. She is just naturally photogenic, naturally beautiful.

She is also naturally kind. You are the moody one in the pair, always grumping about a new day without a cup of coffee to start it. But Hyewon… Hyewon is patient. You try not to be too much for her, with the amount of space your art and materials take and all, yet she always tells you it is okay. It is fine, she says, because she knows you more than anyone and loves you more than anyone. She knows exactly what to make you calm down after a disappointed commissioner, or a day where things are simply too gloomy for you to go on. And you truly do not want to say it out loud in fears of being ridiculed, but you cannot live without her. She is your solace, and if, by any cursed chance, she disappears from this world, you would join her. You would challenge death to return her to you and laugh in its skull face. You would do anything, just to be by her side forever.

You never exaggerate except in paintings. You would honestly do all things those things for Hyewon if needed. You are a blessed man for being able to have her take your last name as her own, live in the same home as her and have her as your muse.

"These are gorgeous," she says. Hyewon looked around your studio, observing the hues and the dues, the bright and the dull. A lot of your drafts have filled the room, and you are a little embarrassed to have your wife look at them.

"You are far more gorgeous than any of them. There is a reason why people like my paintings of you more."

"My husband is so charming," says Hyewon, throwing you a sweet smile. It is only semi-sarcastic, and it looks pretty with her clothes for this shoot. She is wearing your blue polo under a white vest, along with two gray socks that are almost thigh-high. Her visuals affect you a little too much today, but you try to ignore it. Focus on applying the curves of her face on your semi-finished canvas. You have added stripes of brown to show the strands of Hyewon's hair, and alternated between white and light blue to draw her polo.

"How can I not be when you look so..."

Go over Hyewon's whole look and you get even more worked up. Her hair is styled into two buns, while her thighs are generously shown by the skirt that folds around them. Her eyes are wide and curious as she waits for you to continue. But she knows what you are going to say anyway. She is not as innocent as she used to be, being your muse and all.

She spreads her legs a little wider. "Why don't you come and charm me even more?"

Your palette and brush drop to the ground. Suddenly, your arms around Hyewon and you are diligently kissing her. Her lips always taste of sweetness. You can never go without her.

Hyewon cannot go without you either. Her firm kisses and caresses all over the sides of your head and body just show that if you love her, she loves you more. She loves your artwork and your talent and the sleepy face you have as you get up in the morning. She loves your diligence and your kisses and the taut bulge that rubs against her core. She loves you, and after you put her on one of your sturdier desks, you are determined to show that your adoration for her is greater.

Which is why you are glad to tear the vest off of her. She looks hotter in the polo alone, yet you take that one off as well. Her bare, beautiful breasts are presented to you. The brush you pick up once the idea entered your mind dances along their soft mountains. Hyewon lets out a soft whimper. Her sensitivity is at a great height at which she is rendered helpless; she does not know what to do without moaning.

"God, I love you, Hyem," you say breathily.

"Sounds like you're talking to my tits rather than me," laughs Hyewon.

"Fine. I love you." Kiss her again and again. She giggles in between moans. Start from her forehead and end on her breasts. Lick a stripe on their nipples, and squeeze them happily in your hands. "I love you more than anything."

You mean it. You mean it with every pump of blood your heart creates, with every bit of your troubled soul.

Hyewon's thighs shudder as the brush tickles and caresses them. You run kisses along each trail your brush has swiped upon. But soon you are kissing something else, and Hyewon is reduced to moans.

The only clue at what you are doing is her underwear that you have thrown carelessly near the doorway.

"Oh my god, hon," whispers Hyewon, trying to keep a straight face. She raises her head out of view with her eyes closed and a firm bite on her lower lip. "You always eat me so well."

Hyewon loves being eaten out. It is such a divine experience for her. Every session is like the first, when she was particularly delicate and inexperienced. That is why the first suck already brings forth a rush of wetness and her thighs squirm on the sides of your head.

Hyewon remains a beauty, even in her unruly state. Her soft moans are like comforting tunes, motivating even. They coax you to take her harder—lap a teasing tongue up between her folds and wiggle it around, give smacks on her ass above the blue skirt, and suck the pretty nub with more diligence. Hyewon's legs never stop their quivering, and her fingers never stop trying to push you away and keep you licking her. The onslaught of stimulation has her breathless; how does it still feel so new and good?

You spread her legs far apart. Afterwards, stop the thrust of your tongue and go with offering sharp laps on her clitoris. It pulses with need, and so does Hyewon's heart, which beats so fast against her chest that she feels weak. But you are too good at this. She can do nothing but moan and let you fire blunt flicks at her erogenous zone.

"Hmnn... hah! Oh my god, baby!"

She herself is surprised by how early she came. But it is too late; your tongue is already delved deep inside her spasming core, catching the continuous leak of feminine orgasm. And it still feels so good. Sparks keep her on the edge of the desk and her toes curl tightly in response to her rough climax.

Continue the waves of your tongue while you keep her closely to your lips. You are determined to take advantage of the heightened sensitivity of her orgasm and make her feel even more good. You kiss her clit as if it were her own full lips. Give it open-mouthed smooches. By now, Hyewon's moans, which are usually soft and almost silent, have grown and spread inside the studio like a wildfire. Her hips are a force to be reckoned with, bucking against your mouth in search for more and pushing its center into your face. It is no problem for you; you are glad to give more.

You would give anything, in fact, just to see your wife's beautiful and blissful face.

-

Seungwoon took many photographs: of birds, nature, and sometimes his paintings. Many of these were formally released, yet the photos of his wife, although many, were not as abundantly shown to people. He took many pictures of her and kept a large amount for himself. He explained that he felt as if the public did not deserve to see "another side" of Hyewon. Hyewon also said that she would like to keep it that way.

His penultimate photograph of her that we know of is one wherein she reads her books to him. He entitled it A timely read [...]

-

Hyewon's thighs are snug in your lap, yet your cock rather explores in the hole in between them. Its pleasure tells and makes you bounce your own thigh up and down, creating a fulfilling process of her hole squeezing onto your shaft as you enter and exit.

Her fingers lose their assured squeeze on the book. "H-hah, you really aren't going to make this easy for me, are you?" she asks in between moans.

Shake your head; of course not. With her slick entrance ready for the taking, you have all day to plug yourself inside of her.

"Just keep reading, Hyewon-ah," you tell her, sweetly nibbling on her earlobe. She whimpers quietly, but does as you say.

Your thigh rises and falls to let your cock probe further inside her. Her tight, sweet body writhes with each bounce, yet she keeps on reading. She is your good girl, after all. Your muse.

But muses are not as desperate for you as she is. No muse drops to her knees and begs for "just one touch, please," say Hyewon with fearful eyes. "Just this time."

Her breast is fit for pearls /

Hyewon opens her mouth to read once more. However, your hand finds her breast before she can get a word out. From there, she can only make soft, whimpery sounds. Her chirps of pleasure are as pleasant as any songbirds. You love Hyewon's voice. She sings softly round the house, smiling giddily when you catch her, yet she claims that she is as never as good as Jo Yuri, the famous singer at the time. But that doesn't matter to you. You love Hyewon's voice.

Most of all, you love Hyewon.

But I was not a "Diver"— /

It does not matter anyway into her neck. Several counts of delicate cries leave her full lips. But Hyewon loves it. She loves being yours. She loves the way you make her feel, especially with the sword you unsheathe and sheathe again in the depths of her core, as if you are not certain if you should keep it inside or not. She likes it better inside her anyway.

Her brow is fit for pearls /

But I have not a crest.

Hyewon leans back in your shoulder. Kiss her beaded brow lovingly. She has stopped trying to read. It is a setup challenge anyway, designed to make her fail. What, with your cock's rainy adventures in between her wet folds, it was not a fair game from the beginning. But she is your loser, and because you love her, you would give her the prize anyway.

Your lips and Hyewon's collide. Hers are full and soft; there is a reason why you love it when she drops to her knees for you. Both carnal pleasures are hard to choose from, but you'd rather kiss her till you are out of breath than have her mouth somewhere else.

She hums a song of bliss, and you fashion yours with a grunt. Her thighs shake above your lap. Your fingers catch the release she makes. It floods on your hand; Hyewon blushes at your touch lingering on her vagina, and cums even more. It is a flood that you do not mind having assault you.

Because...

Her heart is fit for home /

Not one of your artworks can live up to her undeniable beauty. A studio full of the world's greatest paintings can easily be beaten by her. She is one created with duty and love—a soft yet intimate masterpiece, whose colors you make yourself comfortable in, even as she rests your head on your heart and closes her eyes.

I—a sparrow—build there

Sweet of twigs and twine

My perennial nest.

The little bird sleeps.

-

[...] while his last photograph of her is given the name The last stroll in the yards of life.

-

You do not want to live anymore.

It is as simple as that. Death is something that you would not refuse after the inevitable death she will have to take on. In fact, you welcome it. You urge it to come early despite your youthful age. You challenge it, even. You spit in the face of death and tell him to come get a piece of you.

Before you know it, you are crying again. Your tears blot what was supposed to be a masterpiece, making the colors drip down unpleasantly the canvas into one, big, rainbow mess. But your current state is a bigger mess than your artwork, and so is your life. Your wife will soon leave you, and just thinking about it makes you want to leave first.

If only you did not love her so much. If you didn't, it would not be this hard for the two of you.

"Oh, honey."

Her voice is as sweet as the nickname, but it does not pacify you. Not when you know the arms bound around your quivering form will soon melt away. Not when the scent from her hair and neck directly under your nose will leave along with her, only letting behind few sprays throughout rooms that will drive you crazy for days on end.

And she is so fucking pretty that it hurts.

"Hey," she tells you softly, with a smile that betrays the fear that she feels as well. Her brown sweater is beautiful; it matches the colors of the crops and grass around you. Hyewon truly looks like the love of your life. "It's okay. I'm still here. I haven't gone anywhere yet."

Yet. The word hangs in your mind like a noose. You want to take its rounded syllable ropes and execute yourself with them.

"You look so beautiful, Hyewon," you say, wrapping your arms around her like she does. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too. I love you, too."

You know you sound pathetic, but you go on with it anyway. There is little time left in the hourglass, and each grain of sand counts. "C-can you promise me something?"

"Sure. What is it?"

"P-promise me that you will try to hold on for as long as you can. I—I know it sounds selfish, and it is, but I can't see a life without you, Hyewon. I just can't. I truly think I'll die without you."

Hyewon's eyes are blurred with tears now, just like you. She hates knowing that she can do nothing about you feeling terrible about her dying. She hates knowing that you have felt this way from the moment you knew about her death.

She herself is still not ready for it. She does not know when she will be. Hyewon will always have to look over her shoulder in the afterlife, making sure that you do not follow.

"I promise," she says quietly. She closes her eyes, takes in a deep breath, and exhales through her nose. "I promise with all my heart."

-

Kang Hyewon died on December 23rd, 1924. She succumbed to cancer the night before Seungwoon's first exhibition. It can be deduced that Seungwoon called off his exhibition to mourn his wife and have time for himself. He did not set a date for the day on which the exhibition was supposedly postponed to.

After a week, he shot himself in his studio and died alone. In his suicide note, he asked that he be buried next to his wife and his paintings are formally taken by the university. In 1945, the university showcased his paintings—the famous, the lesser known, finished and unfinished—in one of its biggest exhibitions.

It is safe to say that Kang Seungwoon's artwork maintains its provision of inspiration to people today. People now talk about his paintings, love, and his tragic death as a source of reassurance and motivation. His famous quote still makes its rounds today: "There is no sculpture or painting that has lived up to the chef-d'oeuvre of true love."

[lovemesomesurveys]

What Rhymes With “ATE”?

1. What’s the last thing you ate? Ramen.

2. Do you have a gate to your backyard? Yeah.

3. Who’s your best mate? My mom.

4. How often do you mate? Have sex? Never have.

5. What would you use as bait on a fishing hook? I wouldn’t even go fishing let’s be real, but fine if I did I’d use worms or whatever I guess alkjfklfjklf. I wouldn’t be the one to put it on, though!

6. What do you bate your breath with? Any anxious situation. 

7. What’s the last thing you got in a crate? I don’t get things in crates.

8. When’s the last time you went on a date? Where did you go? Almost 5 years ago. It was a cute coffee and bookstore date with Ty. That was our favorite thing to do.

9. Do you believe in fate? No.

10. Have you ever seen a freight train in person before? Yeah.

11. Do you like grated cheese? Yesss.

12. Do you have an awkward gait? As a paraplegic, no I do not. Everything else about me is awkward, though.

13. When’s the last time you truly felt great? When I was a kid.

14. Who do you hate? Besides myself, no one.

15. Do you know of anyone named Kate or Nate? No.

16. When’s the last time you were late for something? I don’t recall. I’m big on being punctual.

17. Do you know how to plait hair? I haven’t heard it called that, but yes.

18. Do you have a favorite plate? Paper plates, ha.

19. Would rather ice skate or roller skate? I can’t do either one.

20. How would you rate this survey so far? I’ve enjoyed all your surveys!

21. Do you ever just wish for a clean slate? Yesssss.

22. What state do you live in? (if you’re American) California.

23. What is your current state of mind? Blah.

24. Are you straight? Yes.

25. Are you straight-laced? Straight-edged? No, because apparently you can’t have caffeine or narcotics to be considered straightedge, both of which I have.

26. Have you ever visited a strait? No.

27. What’s your best personality trait? Sense of humor.

28. How long will you wait for someone/something? I don’t know? 

29. What is your weight? I’m not exactly sure, but I think mid to low 70lbs. 

30. Are you awaiting anything special? No.

31. Do you berate anyone? Nooo.

32. Is there anyone you’d like to castrate? Uh, no!

33. Are you a cheapskate? Lol I have my moments, but I also can overspend. Just depends, really.

34. When was the last time you collated papers? I don’t recall.

35. Last thing you created? Uhhh.

36. What was your last debate about? I really try and avoid those.

37. Last time you inflated something? Or deflated? I don’t recall.

38. Do you dictate what other people can do? No.

39. Have your pupils ever dilated before? When I go to the eye doctor. 

40. When’s the last time you donated something? A few months ago when I got rid of some clothes.

41. The last time you felt elated? My Disneyland trip earlier this year.

42. Have you ever been to an estate sale? No.

43. What are you fixated on? Health related stuff.

44. How often do your floodgates open? I cry often.

45. Last thing you equated? Hmm.

46. Last time you felt frustrated? The last few days. I feel that way quite often.

47. Do you remember to stay hydrated? Yeah.

48. Do you live upstate? No.

49. How often do you post status updates? I very rarely post status updates on Facebook anymore, I just share things now and then. I tweet a lot, though.

50. How often do you use Google Translate? Not often, but sometimes. I actually did a couple days ago.

51. Who is a classmate that you are still friends with?

52. Have you ever had a teammate before? No.

53. Have you ever tailgated? No.

54. Have you ever reached a stalemate? That’s how I’ve felt the past few years.

55. Have you ever been sedated? Yeah, several times.

56. Do you rotate your mattress? No.

57. Last time you got a rebate? It’s been awhile, but I used to use Ebates (called Rakuten now). I keep forgetting to use it for some reason, which is dumb.

58. Have you ever felt like you could relate to someone? Yeah, many times.

59. Favorite primate? I don’t have one.

60. Do you have something ornate? Uhh. I don’t really have anything fancy.

61. Has an action ever negated the effect of your efforts? Yes.

62. Could you be described as a lightweight? Ha, yeah. For sure.

63. Would you like to visit Kuwait? I haven’t thought about it.

64. Last person that gyrated near you? No one.

65. Do you know someone who is irate or innate? Hmm.

66. Do you know of any inmates? Yes.

67. How long does it take you to acclimate? I struggle with change.

68. Last time you activated something? Not too long ago.

69. What do you advocate for? Stuff.

70. Last time you felt agitated or aggravated? Recently.

71. Last time you had to annotate something? Recently during my Bible study.

72. Have you ever felt alienated before? Yes.

73. What was the last caffeinated beverage you consumed? Starbucks Doubleshot energy drink.

74. Do you like carbonated drinks? Yeah.

75. What captivates you? Staring out at the ocean and listening to the waves crash in and out.

76. What do you allocate a lot of your hours towards? Watching YouTube videos and checking my social medias.

77. Last event you celebrated? 4th of July. Well, we just went out and watched fireworks from the driveway.

78. Last time you were compensated for something? I don’t recall.

79. Do you tend to make things complicated? Yepppp. :/  “Why you gotta go and make things so complicated?”

80. Do you find it hard to concentrate at times? Yes.

81. Have you ever had anything confiscated? No.

82. Last place you congregated at? I haven’t been around a large crowd of people since my Disneyland trip earlier this year. I won’t be again for a very long time given the current state of things.

83. How long are you with someone before you consummate the relationship? I’m a virgin.

84. Last time you had to conjugate a verb? I did that recently when I was helping my mom with her Duolingo Spanish lesson. It amazes me how much I still remember considering I haven’t taken a Spanish class or even really practiced it in almost 10 years. :O I mean, I’ll occasionally try and speak it or if I hear or see it somewhere I’ll try to translate it, but it’s not very often, so I’m surprised I’m still able to at all.

85. Last time you were constipated? I don’t recall.

86. How often do you contemplate life? Often.

87. Are you hard to cooperate with? No, I don’t think so.

88. Do you know anyone who cultivates land? No.

89. Would you want to be cremated? Yes.

90. Do you have any issues with your prostate? I don’t have a prostate. 

91. Have you ever decimated someone’s character before? No.

92. Do you decorate your home for the holidays? Yesss. Well, for Christmas. I used to for Halloween, but I haven’t the past few years. I should do that this year.

93. Who would you dedicate a book you wrote to? My mom.

94. Are you good at delegating group projects? I felt like I always had to take lead in group projects and make sure everything was getting done. I hated doing them, they stressed me out even more.

95. Do you know how to demonstrate things in order to show someone how to do something? I do feel like I suck at trying to explain things to others for the most part, but I guess it depends on the thing. 

96. In what ways do you deviate from “the norm”? I’m soon to be 31 years old and I still live at home with my parents, with no plans to move out anytime soon. I don’t have a job. I don’t have much, basically none, relationship experience. I’m a virgin. I’m just not a functioning adult.

97. How long after you take a painkiller does the pain start to dissipate? It typically takes about 30 minutes, but on really bad pain/flare up days it can take an hour or so and sometimes not until I have the next dose.

98. Do you feel the need to dominate in conversations? Nooo. I’m much more of a listener and I’ll throw the convo back to the other person.

99. Would you ever domesticate a wild animal? Why or why not? No.

100. Who is the last person you congratulated? For what? I don’t remember.

101. Would you like to decapitate anyone? Who, and why? Uh, no!

102. Do you ever think that you could duplicate something you’ve tried before?   Uhh, like what?

103. What do you feel you could educate others about? I don’t know. Remember before how I said I suck at explaining things to others?

104. What elevates your stress level? My heath, my life (including things related to my loved ones in my life, such as their health issues and things they’re dealing with/going through), and just...life in general, man. There’s a lot going on this year alone.

105. Do you have a tendency to make situations escalate? In my mind cause I jump to the worst conclusions. My natural reaction is to freak out.

106.  How good are you at estimating? Uhh, depends what I’m estimating.

107. Do you fabricate your stories? No. 

108. What is something that fascinates you? Psychology.

109. How long does it take you to formulate a game plan? Hmm. Depends.

110. What tends to make your blood pressure fluctuate? Stress and anxiety.

111. How do you generate enough energy to get through your day? What energy? I’m seriously lacking.

112. When did you graduate? I graduated UC back in 2015.

113. When you’re in a department store, which section do you gravitate towards most often? The clothes.

114. How often do you hesitate before doing or saying something? Often.

115. Do you ever wish that you could just hibernate? Yes.

116. Does anyone try to imitate you? Does it get on your nerves? No, but that would most definitely get on my nerves.

117. Do you like to instigate others? Nooo. I’m not an instigator.

118. Could you illustrate a children’s book? I couldn’t illustrate anything, I’m an artist at all.

119. Do you marinate your meats? I don’t cook.

120. Do you masturbate? No. What a way to end, ha.

[a-zebra-is-a-striped-horse]

[kyrenrayne69]

9.20.2020, 9:19pm

I don’t know why I’m here really. I’ve just been kind of feeling weird? lately. Like I can’t explain how I’m feeling or what’s causing it, but I just haven’t really been feeling myself lately. Like I haven’t really been living these past few days. By that I mean that I’ve done things and time has passed, but sitting here now, I just feel like I haven’t been a part of those things. Like it wasn’t me who was doing them. Almost like I’ve been out of body and in a state of existence but unconsciousness? for the past couple of weeks.

Besides that I’ve been very manic depressive. I’ll have a day where I’m very energetic and all about self care and dressing cute and wanting to do impulsive things. The next day I’ll be super down and hate myself and be really fed up with everyone and everything. And this cycle just kind of repeats.

I hung out with my sister one day last week. Our plan was just to get drunk and have fun because it’s rare that I have any time to just chill lately. Well, she ended up sitting me down and having this long, serious conversation with me about how she thinks I’m in a bad place right now and need to do something to get out of it. I won’t go into the details of it, but I felt that she’d gotten a lot of it right. She also did a tarot card reading for me (she’s really into that stuff. I’m not, but I don’t not believe in it), and everything really seemed to add up. It was almost uncanny. I’ve really been thinking over everything she said, actually planning and taking it serious, and some part of me agrees but another sees a lot of drawbacks to her idea. I still haven’t really made up my mind on it, but I have time.

One of the things that she did get wrong (at least in my eyes) is my eating disorder. She told me that she thinks I obsess over my weight and make myself throw up because in my current situation, my weight is the only thing I can control. I don’t think that’s why I do it. I just see myself in the mirror and think that I look disgusting. I want to be skinny and prettier. That’s why I do it.

On that note, I’ve hit below the weight “tier” I was previously at (i.e. if I weighed 96 lbs before now I weigh 89, or if I weighed 102 lbs before now I weigh 99. idk if that makes sense). I don’t really want to share my actually weight because I’m sure that some people will still think I’m fat, but I’ve lost about 50 recently. I’m less than 20 pounds away from my goal weight. If I reach that I’ll be so freaking pumped. I doubt that I’ll stop throwing up after I reach my goal though. Despite it being my goal, I’d obviously still like to be skinnier.

Although I’ve still been making myself sick after eating, I have been being slightly more healthy. I’ve been actually eating less and not as unhealthy foods. I’ve also started casually working out, mostly focusing on my arms and stomach atm. I’m hoping that that’ll help me reach my weight goal faster.

*[I came back after adding my tags because I forgot about this.] I cut myself again recently. It was quite a bit, but I haven’t really thought about it since. It had been a while since I’ve done it, but I’ve just been feeling really overwhelmed lately. It seemed to help at the moment, and now I haven’t felt like doing it again so maybe it did actually help this one time lol.

Completely unrelated, I mentioned this in a previous post, but one of my dogs recently passed away. Ever since that day, our house has felt really empty. I love my other dogs, but I just sort of feel like I’m going through the motions with them now. Like I’m not excited to feed them or take them out. It’s all just sort of things that I do. None of it really seems real. Just that it’s happening. It’s a lot like that feeling of emptiness I mentioned in the beginning. Maybe it’s related, who knows.

The last serious thing I want to talk about is my education and career. This is supposed to be my last semester of university before graduation, as long as I pass my classes. But I just haven’t been motivated. I don’t know if it’s because of the new online class format that we have to use or if I’m finally just burnt out from my years of schooling, but I just don’t feel interested or motivated. I’m hoping to get out of this slump though because I would hate for my last semester to be the one that holds me back after so long. However, I’m also scared to be getting out of school and starting a career. Maybe I’m self-sabotaging myself because I’m nervous. I like my current part-time job enough and wouldn’t mind staying there for a while, but I know I need to get out into the real job world and try to get a better paying, more stable job.

Now that that’s all off my chest, I at least have one positive thing to look forward to. Well, two I guess. The first is that Cyberpunk 2077 comes out in a couple of months. I preordered that game like a year ago, so I’m excited for that to finally release lol. The other thing is that I actually managed to get a ps5 preorder. As a long time playstation fan, I’m super excited. It’s kind of exactly what I need in my life right now. A bit of fun in an otherwise bleak and boring reality. I can’t wait for it to arrive.

Sorry for the long rant, if anyone actually reads this. I just had a lot to think about lately.

[toomanysurveys9]

Ready to answer 151 Questions? 1. When was the last time you swam in a pool? January 2020. 2. Do you like to party? I really enjoy it a lot less than I used to. I would rather be at home with my babies. 3. If your ex suddenly kissed you right now, what would you do? He’s in prison and I’m married and uninterested... SOOOO I would probably slap him. 4. Are you a virgin? I have two kids. So obviously not.

5. What are your parents views on your relationships? I don’t really know what my dad thinks. My mom goes back and forth. She loves Jacob and knows I love him, but hates the way he treats me a majority of the time.

6. If you ran into your current boyfriend/crush in 10 years, would you marry them? I’m married. So... there’s that. 7. Is your best friend dating anyone? My mom is married to my dad. Jacob is married to me. And Kayla is back with her youngest’s dad, which is cool. 8. Describe the shirt you’re wearing? Big and dark gray. 9. Do people who wear Hollister and Abrerbrombie every day bother you? I don’t care what other people wear. 10. Could you go out in public without wearing make-up? I do that every single day. It’s very rare for me to wear makeup. 11. What is one feature that you don’t like? On myself... I hate my teeth and gums. 12. Would people describe you as happy? They might. 13. Are you single? I’m very not single. 14. Does it bother you that pretty much every survey you take asks if you’re single? Not really. I mean. It gets a bit annoying because it’s a boring question but it’s also whatever. 15. Do you have Tumblr? Obviously.

16. What about Xanga? Nope. 17. Have you ever babysat before? Many, many times. 18. Is there a teacher who you absolutely hate? There were some teachers I haven’t enjoyed having in the past.  19. Ever shopped at Sephora? I bought a gift card for Kay once. 20. If your current boyfriend/crush suddenly moved away, what would you do? I’m assuming I’d move with him since we’re married..

21. Do you have any university plans?

I am currently getting my master’s degree in marriage and family therapy. Have no plans to go beyond that.

22. If your best friend revealed she was a homosexual, what would you do?

It would completely shock me if my mom did, although our relationship wouldn’t change. If Jacob did, I would probably be devastated since we’ve been together so long and have two kids... I wouldn’t care much if Kay did.

23. What are your views on sex?

It’s fine if you’re both of age and it’s consensual. I don’t have much of a sex drive these days, which upsets Jacob sometimes. But I’m just so tired. All the time.

24. Do sexual questions bother you?

Nope.

25. Would you rather have sex with your boyfriend or break up?

He’s my husband, and I don’t want a divorce.

26. Have you ever dreamed about your wedding?

I did when I was younger and again when we got engaged.

27. Does it bother you when people TYpe 1yk dis’?

I don’t enjoy it, but you can do what you want, as long as you’re not hurting other people.

28. Do you delete pictures of you and your exes off of Facebook?

I have never had to deal with that, so I’m not sure what I would do.

29. Would you ever date a friends Ex?

I feel like there would be a lot of things that would factor into that decision, but currently, nope.

30. What’s the last book you read?

I don’t remember. It was a children’s book at work.

31. Ready for 10 simple questions?

Sure thing.

32. What is your last name?

Shh.

33. What grade are you in?

I just started my first year of graduate school about 3 weeks ago.

34. What school do you go to?

Northcentral University.

35. Summer, Fall, Winter or Spring?

Spring and Fall are my favorites.

36. Favorite Color?

Black and blue.

37. Are your parents together?

They are.

38. Any siblings?

Four sisters and one brother. All younger.

39. Favorite subject? 

I’ve always loved all things psychology related, except research methods, and english.

40. Least favorite subject? All things math. 41. Favorite song? Slow Down by Nichole. 42. Okay. Simple questions are over. Happy? I don’t care. 43. How many friends do you have on Facebook? No clue. 44. Ever been requested by some old guy from another country? Yeah. 45. Have you ever googled yourself? Yup. 46. Have a Formspring? Nope. 47. You’re offered free tickets to a Justin Bieber concert. What do you do? Sell them if they don’t want to. 48. Would you rather spend the day at an amusement park or a water park? Either!!! 49. Been to Disney world? No but I will someday! 50. If someone posts their status “9 Inches :(” do you know what they mean? Nope. 51. Ever had a boyfriend? Yes.

52. Ever had a huge crush on someone who still doesn’t know? Yeah. 53. Have you done something in the last week that you regret? Yeah. Yelled at my kids... 54. Ever drank alcohol? Yup. 55. Know anyone who’s currently doing drugs? Weed at least. 56. Ever watched The Hills? Nope. 57. What about Jersey Shore? Nope. 58. Ever called someone a slut? Not seriously that I recall. 59. What do you think of short shorts? Not for me.  60. Does it bother you if people swear around you? Nope. 61. Have you ever gotten an A in a subject? Many times. 62. What about a B? ^^^ 63. And a C? A few. 64. How about a D? No. 65. Ever skived? Huh? 66. Would you consider yourself popular and outcast or somewhere in the middle? Outcast for sure. 67. Are most of your friends older or younger than you? My age. Or older. 68. Ever been stabbed in the back by a close friend? Yup. 69. Do you think it’s immature when people laugh at the number 69? Kind of.  70. Ever watched porn? Yeah. Wasn’t into it. 71. How many laws do you think you’ve broken in the past month? Speeding. 72. Do you wake up with an alarm clock? Yup. 73. Do you prefer Wednesdays or Thursdays? Wednesdays. Jacob has them off from Papa John’s. 74. If your school had a Glee Club would you join? Not likely. 75. Ever performed in a talent show? No. 76. Have you ever cried in public? Yeah. I hate it too. 77. Do you have a favorite between your Mom and your Dad? No, although I’m closer to my mom. 78. Would you audition for a reality talent competition? I did and didn’t get past the producers. 79. How many celebrity crushes have you had? A lot. 80. How many non-celebrity crushes have you had? A lot. 81. Name 5 male celebrities who you think are attractive. Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki, Misha Collins, Chris Pratt, and Johnny Depp. 82. Name 5 female celebrities who you think are attractive. Kirsten Vangsness, Monica Raymund, Hilary Duff, I can’t think of more. 83. Ever been compared to a celebrity? Nooo. 84. Have any embarrassing pictures on Facebook? I don’t think so. 85. Do you think spending £20 on Lip Gloss is a waste of money? I wouldn’t do it. 86. Are you opinionated? On some things. 87. Do you have a favorite store? Children clothing stores, like Carter’s or the Children’s Place. Barnes and Noble. 88. Would you ever wear Flare Jeans? Not likely. 89. Do you own jeans that aren’t skinny? I have a couple boot cut pairs. 90. Have you ever worn the same outfit twice in one week? I pretty much wear the same few outfits all week. I only have so many work appropriate shirts. 91. What’s the longest period of time you’ve been away from school? I graduated college in 2016 and just went back to get my master’s about three weeks ago. 92. Do you google abbreviations you don’t understand? Yeah. 93. Does it bother you when people have cats as their profile picture? Nope. Why would it? 94. Own a pair of converse? I do. They’re my favorite. 95. Is there a teacher at your school who has obvious favorites? What I am doing now is online and not like a typically school.

96. If yes, are you one of them? ^^^

97. Do you text in class? I did. And I do text while doing school stuff now, although not often. 98. What brand of jeans do you wear the most? I don’t know. I don’t pay attention to brands. 99. At what point do you think sizes are “Plus Sized?” I don’t know. 100. Do you want to lose weight? Yeah, I do. A lot of it. Like. 100 pounds. Ha. 101. Ever seen a therapist? I have. 102. Ever watched porn? I have, but not really for myself. I didn’t really enjoy it. 103. Ever purposely ignored a text? I have. 104. A facebook message? I have. 105. A poke? Yup. 106. A friend request? Many times. 107. Would you say you read into things too much? Oh, I’m sure. 108. Is your best friend more likely to be the one suggesting something stupid or refusing to do something stupid? Suggesting. 109. Do you have a “fun friend?” (A friend who you have tons of fun with but you never really have deep conversations?) I don’t think so. 110. Ever been called a bully? Not that I can recall. Because I never bullied people. 111. Ever purposely hurt yourself? Many times. 112. Ever gone to church? I used to. Years ago. 113. Would you call either of your parents screw ups? NO. 114. If you turned out exactly like your mom would you be pleased? I would not want to be exactly like her. But there are a lot of good things I would be happy to inherit.  115. What do you want to do with your life? I’m going to become a marriage and family therapist.

116. Let me guess… You have brown hair? I do. 117. Already know what you’re being for Halloween? I don’t dress up. My kids do though. I don’t know what they’re going to be. Wyatt might be spiderman again. 118. Do you still go Trick or Treating? I take my babies. 119. Ever liked someone WAY older than you? Celebrities. 120. Does it bother you when people have really loud conversations on the bus? I don’t really care. 121. When you have sunglasses on, do you stare at people? I do not. 122. Ever had a credit card denied? Probably. 123. What’s the last movie you watched? I don’t remember. 124. Last TV Show? Uhhh. Maybe Criminal Minds? 125. You see your Ex making out with one of your friends. What do you do? I wouldn’t likely care. 126. Ever been called a whore? I don’t think so. But it’s possible. 127. Are you american? I am. 128. Ever made yourself throw up? Yeah.  129. Have you ever kissed someone who wasn’t your boyfriend? On a dare - Kayla and/or Brittany. 130. Are you Cute or Gross? Gross. 131. Does it bother you when people say “LOOK HOW MUCH YOU’VE GROWN!”? It’s been years since anyone said that, but no, it didn’t bother me. 132. Can you say intelligent things around the guy you like? We’re married and have been together many years. I would hope I could have intelligent conversations with him at this point. 133. Ever had the lead in a play? No. 134. What about a solo in a concert? I did once in high school. 135. What kind of a student are you? I’m a good student. I’ve always done very well. 136. Worst subject? I have always hated math. 137. Best subject? English or history. 138. Ever had a crush on a teacher? No. 139. Would it bother you if you found out that your mother was pregnant? It’s super impossible so I would be pretty confused. 140. How late do you sleep in? I have to be up by 7:20ish. 141. Do you edit your profile pictures before posting them? Sometimes I use filters. 142. Be 100% honest. Do you have any friends who are uglier than you? I am the ugly friend, 100%. 143. Do you believe in love? Obviously. 144. Would you consider yourself a good student? Yeah.. 145. Does it bother you when Surveys ask “Did you like this survey?” I don’t care. 146. Salty, Sweet, Sour or Spicy? Depends on my mood but usually salty or sweet. 147. Are you going into High School this year? Nope. Graduated 2012. 148. What about Junior High? Heck no. Ha. 149. What is one thing someone could say to you right now that would make you cry? That someone I love was seriously hurt or died. 150. Where did you find this note? @lovemesomesurveys :) 151. Last question. How many unread messages are in your phone? I have no idea since Wyatt is using it.

[purplesurveys]

702

Survey makers are quick, lmao. 1. Are you staying home from work/school? I’m staying home in general. They extended the quarantine until April 30, too - previously it was only meant until the 12th. Now I know for sure I’ll have to celebrate my 22nd at home.  A lot of schools have made it a point to suspend online classes as well, including mine. The Philippines still suffers from an overall slow internet connection and not everyone is well-off, so online classes creates nothing but inequality between students in our case. Suspension of online classes has been a common move for schools to show that no student must be left behind. Again, y’all are lucky your internet speed is never something to be worried about.

2. If you’re staying home, who’s there with you? I have my entire family and my dog. I know my dad is scheduled to leave for overseas again this April to get back to his job, but with the lockdown not getting lifted anytime soon I dunno what it means for him. I certainly don’t want him to leave now... I’ve grown used to having him around and having a complete family for once.

3. Do you have pets to keep you company? Yes. I’ve never seen my dog be so cuddly until he kept seeing all of us at home every day since March. He has already forgotten how to go down the stairs in the last few years because he was getting older, but ever since the quarantine started he re-learned how to so he can spend time with us downstairs hahaha it’s adorable.

4. Who do you miss the most? Gabie, my college friends.

5. When was the last time you left your home? March 10. That evening I went out with my parents to visit my grandpa because his birthday would have fallen on the next day. It was also one of the last few days before they imposed a stricter lockdown.

6. What was the last thing you bought? I can’t go out but I asked my dad to buy me soju so I can at least drink while being bored out of my mind in quarantine.

7. Is quarantine driving you insane or are you finally relaxed? The prospect of not going anywhere for a month made me want to go insane at first but the longer I spent at home has made made me feel like it’s not as bad as I thought. I’m secretly enjoying it right now lmao, and the biggest con seems to be missing eating out at my favorite restaurants.

8. Are you a homebody? Not really. I like going out and being out til late, but this quarantine has made me realize I don’t mind having to stay home either.

9. What movies have you watched recently? What shows are you watching? You must know the internet connection in the Philippines is still horrendous in 2020, so I don’t watch movies or shows in the day out of consideration for my family hahaha. But stuff I’ve watched late at night are honestly just rewatches – Friends and Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo. I tried watching That 70s Show but I couldn’t get past the first five minutes. I finished BoJack Horseman last month, though. 

I mostly watch YouTube series because they’re just as good as the shows anyway.

10. An event that you were looking forward to that got cancelled? Fortunately I didn’t/don’t have a lot of happenings that would’ve happened in March and April. Most of the stuff I was excited for are just postponed like my graduation, or would need a lot of readjustments like my birthday.

I think a college party that usually happens in May would be getting canceled, though. My orgmates and I usually go there as a big group to celebrate the end of the semester, so the inevitable cancellation sucks.

11. What’s the best and worst thing you’ve had to cancel? I don’t plan a lot of events myself, so most of the adjustments I’ve had to go through is just me going with the flow.

12. Do you have any new hobbies? I mean I got reacquainted with doing surveys again. I was also supposed to paint again like what I started doing over the Christmas break, but apparently acrylic paint dries up over time and now I have containers of dried-up, useless acrylic paint :/ And a barely-filled artwork. Ugh.

13. What are you out of? I’m hoping we have another pack of napkins because the current pack is almost out and I’m still in the middle of my period. Also, drinking alcohol.

14. What music are you listening to? I’m 102% sure I’ve only been listening to lo-fi this whole time. I haven’t even been listening to Hayley Williams’ new singles, and she’s released several of them since the lockdown started.

15. What are you reading? I haven’t been reading, just like before the break. I did have to read this book titled Fast Food Nation by Eric Schlosser to write a book report for one of my classes but that’s it.

16. What are you doing for self-care? I always make sure I’m preoccupied. IDK, turns out being a homebody doesn’t bother me too much so self-care’s been pretty easy.

17. Are you exercising? Nah. I didn’t even do it before the break so it’s not like much has changed in this aspect.

18. How’s your toilet paper supply? That’s actually sort of a running joke in this part of the world lmao...we have no idea why Americans (and maybe other countries?) have been hogging toilet paper so much. That being said, we’ve always been unbothered about our supply because we don’t use a lot.

19. Have you made any changes to your hair during quarantine? NO. I made a big change to my hair 6 days before the fucking quarantine, and barely anyone got to see it hfffjdhdfdlk.

[theancientgeekoroman]

While this might not be your area of expertise could you lend any advice to a high school senior (almost college freshman) planning on going into History, looking at a masters in museum studies? I’m a bit over whelmed and not entirely sure I know where to start

Hi, Nonny!

Okay, I did actually get an MA in Museum Studies from the University of Oklahoma, so I do have some experience there :3 I work in a museum professionally at the moment as well.

For History in general at the university level is a lot of analysis and reading and a lot of papers. If you’re in the US, I would suggest looking into CLEP exams for the introductory courses (History 101, 102), depending on your university, if you want to skip over the beginning courses. CLEP will help you test out of courses before you go into courses and can save you money in the long run. (If you’re not in the US, you can always look into an equivalent program that lets you test out of lower-level courses in your country if your university system works that way).

One of the things I’d suggest before going to your university is to e-mail the professors in the history program (look up and see what courses they teach) and express your excitement of working with them. You can also see if they list any of their syllabi online to get an idea of the kind of workload they assign and what textbooks they expect you to have for their courses. One of the most useful thing I did as a history major was keep all my textbooks because I needed them again - one of my undergraduate textbooks I had in 2015 I ended up needing this year for graduate school! So, you never know.

The other thing I did was I color-coded my notes/highlighter for different eras for my classes. It helped a lot because my ancient history was always yellow, Medieval was blue, Renaissance was orange, etc. That worked for me, but remember that you have to try and figure out what works best for you.

I know that my history homework (in 3-credit American courses) always had about three hours per course each day I had class - so if I had it three times a week, I was reading about 9 hours a week. I have dyslexia and ADHD, so I had to make my schedule to accommodate for that, so the three hours, depending on the day, it might take me 6 hours for something that would usually take half that time. Make sure you take a lot of breaks during the readings because it can really get overwhelming. Stand up, stretch, get a glass of water, and if you have trouble concentrating on one of the readings, don’t be afraid to change which homework you’re focusing on.

As I’ve said with other advice, remember to talk to your professors. This is especially important in history because it can be overwhelming. One of my favorite professors was a Medieval professor, and I kept in touch with him well into graduate school. As you go through the program, don’t just meet with your assigned advisor, but talk to all of your professors. A lot of them will be good for recommendations in the future, and a lot of them give invaluable advice about how to proceed in your career.

Here’s the thing about Museum Studies degrees that I didn’t realize before I was already halfway through my program: the field is exceptionally over-saturated with people with museum degrees. However, having said that, if you want to get the degree, I wouldn’t blame you. I got mine because I wanted it and then I decided to pursue my MA in Classical Studies. So, I’m going to give you a couple of options because I know this is overwhelming, but remember, you still haven’t even started university yet, so grad school is still a bit away for you, and there might be even better options once you’re graduating!

The first thing I would suggest is that if you can, over the summer, try to volunteer at a local museum and see if they’ll let you float over different departments to see what you like best. Related places like local art galleries are also an option! A lot of places also have internships, but you might need a little bit more experience before an internship (high school internships happen, but it’s been my experience that many museums prefer interns that are enrolled in college already). 

Most universities have galleries and museums so you can volunteer there, too. Some university museums have front desk paid positions for students, so check that out as well! 

Museum Studies isn’t the only graduate degree to consider when you’re thinking about working in a museum after graduate school. Another thing to consider is getting a graduate degree with a Museum Studies graduate certificate to complement it could be an option for you. 

If you’re thinking about working in a science-based museum, multiple different science degrees would be applicable. One of the jobs I looked at ended up requiring an Entomology degree, so you never know! Other degrees that might help would be a graduate degree in Anthropology, Art Conservation, Art History, Education, History, etc. One of the things you should do is look at the museums you would like to work at and see the educational background of the current employees and the openings there to see which is the best route to take. (Additionally, if you have an MA in any of those fields, depending on where you live, you could also teach community college in addition to or while you’re searching for a museum position). 

Another degree to consider that I think is applicable is a Master in Library Science, some degree programs of which have a Museum Studies specialization (such as the one at Kent State University: https://www.kent.edu/iSchool/museum-studies). The good thing about pursuing an MLIS with a focus on museums is that you can apply to public and academic libraries as well as museum libraries, which gives a little more flexibility.  

The reason why I give you all these other options (I know it’s a lot) is that I didn’t get a museum job until six months after I got my BA degrees and moved across the country - twice. This was also after having an apprenticeship, several internships, and uncountable volunteer hours as well. So, that’s a lot to consider. Once I got to where I live now, though, I got a museum job almost two weeks after I moved here, so you have to take where you live into account, too. Las Vegas is a pretty transient city, and a lot of people here don’t have Museum Studies MAs, so it’s a rarity. Other places that I lived (like Chicago) have so many people vying for the same jobs, it’s difficult to get your foot in the door. But, that’s why the volunteering, internships, and networking is so important. Professors are part of your networking, so keep that in mind, too. If your university has an art history club or history club or museum club, join it/them. Go to the museum and gallery openings at your university and talk with the people there. Usually, they have a lot of the professors and upperclassmen there, as well as local museum professionals. Go to events at local museums and art galleries, too! One of the things I wish I had done before I did that was make business cards that I could give to the people I met there, which is what I do at my current place of work when I meet people who want to keep in touch with me. Small things like that could go a long way. 

I would spend some time researching the schools that you’re interested in for graduate school (as I assume you’ve already chosen which university you’re going to next year already) and compare their programs. While you’re an undergraduate, try to take one course in other fields that might interest you. A lot of times you can take courses in Anthropology or Art History for general education requirements and sometimes they’ll count towards a history major. Don’t be afraid to explore outside of your comfort zone. 

The last thing I would recommend is after you do all this research, and you still want to go to graduate school specifically for Museum Studies, then you should do it. I loved my program, and although everyone told me once I graduated that I would not see a good ROI (return on investment), I had wasted my time. But one of the things I did during my program was an internship at a museum on the same campus where I would get my first full-time benefitted position. I learned how to run a museum. I learned best practices and how to curate. I learned basic exhibition design. I learned art and museum law. There was a lot that was covered in the program that was generalized that will help me in any museum I work at in the future, which is part of why I liked the program. The MA in Classical Studies was my next move because I would like to be a curator of Ancient Greek and Roman art eventually. 

Just remember, take a deep breath, and you don’t have to worry about graduate school quite yet, but if you want to make sure you’re keeping up with the job market, keep an eye out and follow positions you want on sites like Indeed.com so you can see what people are looking for and begin to gain skills in those areas. 

Also, and this is weirdly important for a history major, but I have seen current university students not know how to do it - learn to write and read cursive, in your native language and the language of any historical figure you might be studying. Somehow this has become a special skill, but I know it because we were required to use it in Catholic school. 

I hope this wasn’t too overwhelming, and if you want to ask me more about my MA in Museum Studies, feel free to do so. Let me know if you want any clarifications on what I’ve outlined here; I know it was a lot. 

All the best,

Tychon, the Ancient Geeko-Roman

[bohemianrhapsody86]

200 Things About Me (originally 200 Things You Can Put In My Ask)

I got this off of @rami-malek-trash - don’t know who the original poster was, sorry if it’s you. I’m bored and cramping and no one usually sends me asks anyway, so I’m just going to answer all of these myself 

200: My crush’s name is: Drew (Now boyfriend, but he was my middle school crush) 199: I was born in: 1986 198: I am really: cool 197: My cellphone company is: T-Mobile 196: My eye color is: green 195: My shoe size is: 9.5/10 194: My ring size is: 9/10 193: My height is: 5′6″ 192: I am allergic to: Nothing 191: My 1st car was: 2001 PT Cruiser 190: My 1st job was: Server at a local pizzeria 189: Last book you read: Startalk: Everything You Ever Need to Know About Space Travel, Sci-Fi, the Human Race, the Universe, and Beyond by Neil DeGrasse Tyson 188: My bed is: Not very comfortable. I need a new mattress, but I need a job first.  187: My pet: A siamese cat named Chico. 186: My best friend: Amanda  185: My favorite shampoo is: I like using Aussie 2-in-1, I also like using Shimmer Lights occasionally so I can keep my gray hairs nice and shiny.  184: Xbox or ps3: PS3 183: Piggy banks are: Cool. I have one that counts my change lol 182: In my pockets: Nothing because they hate putting usable pockets in women’s pants.  181: On my calendar: I marked where I started my period yesterday, and my boyfriends 32nd birthday is next Tuesday.  180: Marriage is: Something I want everyone to have the option for if they want it. 179: Spongebob can: use his imagination 178: My mom: is amazing! 177: The last three songs I bought were? Cool and Sucker by The Jonas Brothers, Don’t really buy many singles, just albums if I’m interested and their cheap.  176: Last YouTube video watched: Brooke Candy - Paper or Plastic 175: How many cousins do you have? Too many to remember 174: Do you have any siblings? Yes, an older brother and older half-sister. 173: Are your parents divorced? Yes, they divorced back in 1999 172: Are you taller than your mom? Yes. We used to be the same height, but gravity has taken a hold of her and squashed her down.  171: Do you play an instrument? I used to play the trombone in middle school, but that was 20 years ago. I’m sure if I ever got my hands on one again, I might remember a scale or two.  170: What did you do yesterday? Went around town job hunting and then bought a maxi dress at a local craft store.  [ I Believe In ] 169: Love at first sight:Yes 168: Luck: Yes 167: Fate: Yes 166: Yourself: Sometimes 165: Aliens: Yes 164: Heaven: Yes and No 163: Hell: We live there now. 162: God: No 161: Horoscopes: Yes 160: Soul mates: Yes 159: Ghosts: Yes 158: Gay Marriage: Yes 157: War: No 156: Orbs: Yes/No 155: Magic: Yes [ This or That ] 154: Hugs or Kisses: Kisses 153: Drunk or High: High  152: Phone or Online: Online 151: Red heads or Black haired: Black haired 150: Blondes or Brunettes: Brunette 149: Hot or cold: Cold 148: Summer or winter: Winter 147: Autumn or Spring: Autumn 146: Chocolate or vanilla:Chocolate 145: Night or Day: Night 144: Oranges or Apples: Apples 143: Curly or Straight hair: Curly 142: McDonalds or Burger King: McDonalds 141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: Milk Chocolate 140: Mac or PC: PC 139: Flip flops or high heals: Flip Flops 138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: Sweet and Poor 137: Coke or Pepsi: Always been a Pepsi girl 136: Hillary or Obama: Obama 135: Burried or cremated: Cremated and turned into a tree or my ashes made into a vinyl 134: Singing or Dancing: Singing 133: Coach or Chanel: Neither 132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: Katherine McPhee 131: Small town or Big city: Small Town 130: Wal-Mart or Target: Target 129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: Ben Stiller 128: Manicure or Pedicure: Mani 127: East Coast or West Coast: East Coast - never been to the West Coast 126: Your Birthday or Christmas: Birthday because it sometimes falls on Thanksgiving.  125: Chocolate or Flowers: Chocolate 124: Disney or Six Flags: Disney 123: Yankees or Red Sox: Neither, Cubbies til the day I die.  [ Here’s What I Think About ] 122: War: Pointless 121: George Bush: Better than the asshat in office now. 120: Gay Marriage: If I can get married to my boyfriend, the my friend Jerry should be able to get married to his boyfriend, Josh.  119: The presidential election: I hate that orange buffoon.  118: Abortion: I’m pro-choice.  117: MySpace: Always had trouble figuring out my Top 8 and what background I wanted to use.  116: Reality TV: Only thing I really watch are cooking competitions. Those are the only ones that matter. Not a fan of the Kardashians or the Bachelor/ette bullcrap.  115: Parents: My mom is amazing, my ‘dad’ was never really there.  114: Back stabbers: Asshats 113: Ebay: Hardly use it.  112: Facebook: Good to stay in touch with people you want to/some of the groups on there are awesome.  111: Work: Don’t have a job as of yet. *keeps fingers crossed I hear back from someone soon* 110: My Neighbors: Loud AF and nasty. I live in an apartment and the neighbors upstairs have so many kids and animals up there it’s ridiculous. I wish they’d leave.  109: Gas Prices: Ridiculous, but not as bad as I’ve seen it before.  108: Designer Clothes: Meh, not my style unless I find something in my size at Goodwill.  107: College: Been there, done that. Not really for me. Never graduated.  106: Sports: I like watching them, mainly baseball and basketball. The NFL can go fuck themselves.  105: My family: Love my blood relatives and my chosen family.  104: The future: It’s so bright, I gotta wear shades.  [ Last time I ] 103: Hugged someone: last night when my boyfriend came over and brought me my phone charger.  102: Last time you ate: An hour ago. 101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: At my bestie’s baby shower.  100: Cried in front of someone: Sometime last week 99: Went to a movie theater: When Endgame came out 98: Took a vacation: 2010 97: Swam in a pool: A few summers ago 96: Changed a diaper: 2007? 95: Got my nails done: 2007? 94: Went to a wedding: 1999 93: Broke a bone: Never *keeps fingers crossed* 92: Got a peircing: 2012? 91: Broke the law: I probably broke the speed limit yesterday at some point.  90: Texted: about 2am this morning.  [ MISC ] 89: Who makes you laugh the most: My bestie Amanda and boyfriend Drew 88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my cat. 87: The last movie I saw: Ant-Man  86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: getting a job 85: The thing im not looking forward to: Interviewing for a job 84: People call me: loyal 83: The most difficult thing to do is: finding a job 82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: Yep, 77 in a 55. 81: My zodiac sign is: Sun - Sagittarius, Moon - Leo

80: The first person i talked to today was: If you count texting my boyfriend at 2am, then him.  79: First time you had a crush: Sometime in Elemetary School.  78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: my mom 77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: yesterday 76: Right now I am talking to: myself 75: What are you going to do when you grow up: I have no clue 74: I have/will get a job: soon 73: Tomorrow: Never Comes 72: Today: Is the day 71: Next Summer: Not here 70: Next Weekend: I have no clue 69: I have these pets: 12 year old 17 lb cat named Striper.  68: The worst sound in the world: My cat hacking up a hairball.  67: The person that makes me cry the most is: myself 66: People that make you happy: my mom, brother, sister-in-law, boyfriend, best friend. 65: Last time I cried: sometime last week 64: My friends are: amazing 63: My computer is: pretty cool and loaded up with Sims stuff.  62: My School: I don’t go to school anymore.  61: My Car: gets me there.  60: I lose all respect for people who: disrespect me or my loved one.  59: The movie I cried at was: Endgame 58: Your hair color is: salt & pepper 57: TV shows you watch: Legends of Tomorrow, Worst Cooks in America, Any cooking show really.  56: Favorite web site: Tumblr 55: Your dream vacation: Somewhere away from my town 54: The worst pain I was ever in was: when I had that ovarian cyst. 53: How do you like your steak cooked: medium 52: My room is: messy 51: My favorite celebrity is: too many to list  50: Where would you like to be: in bed 49: Do you want children: nope 48: Ever been in love: yes 47: Who’s your best friend: Amanda 46: More guy friends or girl friends: About the same.  45: One thing that makes you feel great is: music 44: One person that you wish you could see right now: my grandma 43: Do you have a 5 year plan: I don’t even have a 5 minute plan 42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: Kinda, not really 41: Have you pre-named your children: Nope 40: Last person I got mad at: The Dump, but that’s a daily thing.  39: I would like to move to: out of the US 38: I wish I was a professional: crocheter/crafter [ My Favorites ] 37: Candy: Butterfinger Cups 36: Vehicle: Don’t really have one 35: President: Barack Obama 34: State visited: Pennsylvania 33: Cellphone provider: Always been with T-Mobile 32: Athlete: Anthony Rizzo 31: Actor: Tom Hanks 30: Actress: Sandra Bullock 29: Singer: Freddie Mercury 28: Band: Queen 27: Clothing store: Lane Bryant 26: Grocery store: Aldi 25: TV show: Don’t really have one 24: Movie: Too many to count 23: Website: This black hole of a site 22: Animal: Cat 21: Theme park: Don’t really have one. I did enjoy Six Flags over Georgia when I went back in 2002. Dollywood is always fun but it’s been even longer than that since I’ve been there.  20: Holiday: Halloween 19: Sport to watch: Baseball 18: Sport to play: Nothing.  17: Magazine: Entertainment Weekly 16: Book: Harry Potter 15: Day of the week: Thursday 14: Beach: Virginia Beach 13: Concert attended: Jonas Brothers in VA Beach 12: Thing to cook: bacon 11: Food: bacon 10: Restaurant: Hmmm....don’t know that one.  9: Radio station: Classic Hits 102.7...hardly any commercials and they tell you the artist and song title after every song. 70s, 80s, and 90s songs.  8: Yankee candle scent: Don’t have one 7: Perfume: The scented oils from a local curiosity shop have some of my fave scents.  6: Flower: Iris 5: Color: Blue 4: Talk show host: Jimmy Fallon 3: Comedian: I’ve got several 2: Dog breed: Corgi 1: Did you answer all these truthfully? Yes.    

[kylorenpunk]

Well I challenged @masonjar828 to do this ask meme like 200 years ago and he challenged me back but I’ve been busy so here we are. 

200: My crush’s name is: don’t have one. men suck. 199: I was born in: Mickey Mouse’s lair aka Orlando 198: I am really: trying not to make a self deprecating joke rn 197: My cellphone company is: Not being disclosed bc I don’t need stalkers 196: My eye color is: brown 195: My shoe size is: 8. I’m pretty sure I’m supposed to be taller than I am bc of that shoe size 194: My ring size is: Uh no idea. Maybe 9? 193: My height is: Five foot three inches 192: I am allergic to: A couple of antibiotics but that’s it  191: My 1st car was: 1995 Honda Accord. RIP Goldeen. 190: My 1st job was: Technically I was an assistant for an occupational therapy clinic that paid me under the table. My first paid job was a pool attendant for a hotel.  189: Last book you read: My professor’s shitty textbook.  188: My bed is: currently unmade.  187: My pet: doesn’t exist. Bro is allergic to the entire animal kingdom 186: My best friend: I have multiple and love them all very much  185: My favorite shampoo is: Just recently bought a new shampoo from OGX (coconut curls I think?)  184: Xbox or ps3: xbox 183: Piggy banks are: Not a bad concept. I have upgraded to using mason jars to save money  182: In my pockets: Not wearing pockets atm. Usually I only carry my phone tho 181: On my calendar: Is a bunch of doctor’s appointments 180: Marriage is: Fantastic with the right person 179: Spongebob can: ??? do whatever he wants? idk what op was thinking 178: My mom: is great and shouldn’t have to deal with my shit 177: The last three songs I bought were? I haven’t bought music in over two years. Spotify is my life. 176: Last YouTube video watched: I watch so many a day that I forgot what I last watched.  175: How many cousins do you have? 5 on paternal side. 3 on maternal. But I’m hispanic so it’s def more than immediate family  174: Do you have any siblings? 1 and he’s a pain but I love him 173: Are your parents divorced? nope. fun fact. I used to think divorce was normal as a child and wondered when I would get a second set of parents.  172: Are you taller than your mom? No I’m like 4 inches shorter 171: Do you play an instrument? is mayonnaise an instrument 170: What did you do yesterday? future job training and watched my brother [ I Believe In ] 169: Love at first sight: Lust at first sight  168: Luck: kinda 167: Fate: sure 166: Yourself: a lot more than I used to  165: Aliens: why not 164: Heaven: in a way 163: Hell: sure 162: God: the catholic in me says yes 161: Horoscopes: yes and no  160: Soul mates: tough question. 21 year old me would have said yes. 23 me is on the fence. Maybe for other people but I don’t really believe it for myself.  159: Ghosts: I love ghost walks so I hope they’re real 158: Gay Marriage: Of fucking course 157: War: No 156: Orbs: Isn’t this the same as ghosts? 155: Magic: No  [ This or That ] 154: Hugs or Kisses: Either one has it’s benefits 153: Drunk or High: Never been high so I guess drunk  152: Phone or Online: they mean the same thing now 151: Red heads or Black haired: dark hair 150: Blondes or Brunettes: brunettes 149: Hot or cold: hot  148: Summer or winter: summer 147: Autumn or Spring: spring 146: Chocolate or vanilla: depends. rn I want vanilla 145: Night or Day: day 144: Oranges or Apples: oranges 143: Curly or Straight hair: doesn’t matter. I feel more myself with straight hair tho 142: McDonalds or Burger King: mcdonald’s  141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: milk  140: Mac or PC: pc. Apple is a peice of shit.  139: Flip flops or high heals: heals 138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: this is a weird question 137: Coke or Pepsi: depends on whether it’s a can, glass or on ice 136: Hillary or Obama: lol was this made in 2008 135: Burried or cremated: not sure. i wanna say burried tho 134: Singing or Dancing: I’m bad at both 133: Coach or Chanel:  neither 132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: who 131: Small town or Big city: small town 130: Wal-Mart or Target: target  129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: ben stiller 128: Manicure or Pedicure: pedicure. my hands never last 127: East Coast or West Coast: east  126: Your Birthday or Christmas: christmas bc I can see my family 125: Chocolate or Flowers: flowers 124: Disney or Six Flags: six flags despite the fact that i’ve never been 123: Yankees or Red Sox: I don’t give a shit about sports [ Here’s What I Think About ] 122: War: dumb 121: George Bush: dumb 120: Gay Marriage: I’m hoping for a day where the LGBTQ+ community is no longer discrimated against 119: The presidential election: dumb 118: Abortion: No woman should be denied a right to abortion  117: MySpace: yeah this was made in 2008 116: Reality TV: dumb 115: Parents: great wonderful  114: Back stabbers: dumb 113: Ebay: useful 112: Facebook: kinda useful 111: Work: a necessity 110: My Neighbors: I don’t talk to them 109: Gas Prices: could be lower 108: Designer Clothes: I don’t care 107: College: a scam but education is worth it 106: Sports: depends on the sport 105: My family: great wonderful 104: The future: idk [ Last time I ] 103: Hugged someone: yesterday 102: Last time you ate: when I started this thing 101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: last month 100: Cried in front of someone: Two weeks ago 99: Went to a movie theater: going tonight 98: Took a vacation: three years ago. going soon tho 97: Swam in a pool: I don’t even remember.  96: Changed a diaper: never 95: Got my nails done: a year and a half ago 94: Went to a wedding: a year and a half ago 93: Broke a bone: never 92: Got a peircing: three years ago 91: Broke the law: probs when I was underage drinking 90: Texted: yesterday [ MISC ] 89: Who makes you laugh the most: all of my friends 88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: free food and family 87: The last movie I saw: toy story 4 86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: starting my career job 85: The thing im not looking forward to: taxes being taken out of my paycheck 84: People call me: Karina, Kari or Rina 83: The most difficult thing to do is: let go of someone in your life 82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: nope 81: My zodiac sign is: cancer 80: The first person i talked to today was: no one. Update my boss just called lol 79: First time you had a crush: 1st grade lmao 78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: myself 77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: uh recently I think  76: Right now I am talking to: Romantic? no one Normally? No one lmao  75: What are you going to do when you grow up: I’m grown but I’m not disclosing my job on here 74: I have/will get a job: already have one 73: Tomorrow: I’m working 72: Today: I’m cleaning 71: Next Summer: No idea 70: Next Weekend: no idea 69: I have these pets: no I don’t 68: The worst sound in the world: styrofoam 67: The person that makes me cry the most is: my mother 66: People that make you happy: family and friends 65: Last time I cried: Thursday 64: My friends are: cool great wonderful 63: My computer is: working 62: My School: I’m graduated 61: My Car: I need to wash today 60: I lose all respect for people who: have no respect 59: The movie I cried at was: toy story 4 58: Your hair color is: brown 57: TV shows you watch: Sabrina, jane the virgin 56: Favorite web site: twitter 55: Your dream vacation: new york 54: The worst pain I was ever in was: wisdom teeth 53: How do you like your steak cooked: medium rare 52: My room is: a mess 51: My favorite celebrity is: chris evans 50: Where would you like to be: on vacation 49: Do you want children: yes 48: Ever been in love: three times. Ironically only one was with someone I actually dated 47: Who’s your best friend: I have multiple 46: More guy friends or girl friends: good mixture of both 45: One thing that makes you feel great is: makeup 44: One person that you wish you could see right now: a few 43: Do you have a 5 year plan: hell no 42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: not a physical list 41: Have you pre-named your children: kinda 40: Last person I got mad at: no disclosing 39: I would like to move to: the smokey mountains 38: I wish I was a professional: MUA [ My Favorites ] 37: Candy: lifesaver gummies 36: Vehicle: hondas 35: President: obama 34: State visited: TN 33: Cellphone provider: ATT 32: Athlete: n/a 31: Actor: i can’t choose 30: Actress: cant choose 29: Singer: can’t choose 28: Band: currently little mix 27: Clothing store: rip charolette russe 26: Grocery store: publix is the only acceptable floridian answer 25: TV show: jane the virgin 24: Movie: high school musical 23: Website: twitter 22: Animal: meerkat 21: Theme park: busch gardens 20: Holiday: halloween 19: Sport to watch: soccer  18: Sport to play: none 17: Magazine: n/a 16: Book: eragon 15: Day of the week: friday 14: Beach: n/a 13: Concert attended: hannah montana? 12: Thing to cook: beans 11: Food: rice 10: Restaurant: taco bell 9: Radio station: n/a 8: Yankee candle scent: n/a 7: Perfume: anything fruity 6: Flower: rose? 5: Color: pink or blue 4: Talk show host: ellen 3: Comedian: n/a 2: Dog breed:  black lab 1: Did you answer all these truthfully?  wouldn’t you like to know

[klaineanummel]

unexpected 3/24?

Blaine Anderson was just about the last thing Professor Kurt Hummel expected out of a TA.

Because I'm so behind, I'm cheating a little bit and using the @klaineadvent prompt for day 4 (deputy) for this chapter, even though technically this should be day 3. oops?  Hope you enjoy anyway!!

Read on AO3  |  Previous Chapter

Soon enough the sun has set on the day before classes begin and has risen on the first day of classes.

They’re beginning on a Wednesday this year, for god knows what reason, but Kurt is thankful since he only has two classes to teach on Wednesday’s. One is a small seminar, only for Music Studies senior students, and the other is his Popular Music 101 lecture.

It’s his largest class, and only one of two lecture classes he’s kept on since becoming a full-time professor. Although he much prefers seminar-style classes, where he and the students can bounce ideas off each other, he can’t deny his love for this particular class. He’s been honing the syllabus for eight years now and is very proud of what he manages to do in the class every year.

It’s also the reason that he is assigned more TA’s than anybody else in his department. As there are only a few lecture-style classes in the music department, most professor’s don’t need more than one or two TA’s across all their classes. Kurt is always given four – three for Popular Music 101, and one for Musical Composition 102.

Usually he’s grateful for the extra hands, but this year…

Well, let’s just say that this year the extra hands caused him to have a very interrupted sleep before his first day of classes.

He continues thinking about it on his way to work. All the thoughts that kept him tossing and turning all night continue to bombard him, barely allowing him a moments rest.

He’s a TA. He’s your TA. You’re technically his boss, and he’s technically a student.

But he’s older than me. He has far more life experience. He worked in business only a decade less than I’ve been alive.

You’re in a position of power over him, on multiple levels. It would be wrong.

He’s genuine and kind, and he isn’t some twenty-year-old twink trying to flirt his way to a better grade.

He has two grown children, but no ring, which means his familial situation has to be complicated on some level.

He might not even be gay.

He’s so pretty.

It’s hopeless. By the time he’s reached campus all he’s managed to do is twist his brain up into more of a knot than it already was.

He forces himself to take deep breaths as he begins the walk from the subway station to Popular Music 101. Thank god it’s just the first day. He doesn’t know how he’d be able to lecture for an hour and a half with his mind in its current state.

By the time he reaches the lecture hall it’s already filled with the voices of three-hundred-plus students. He notices Blaine, Mercedes, and Tina all sitting together in the front row, but all engaged in different conversations with students around them.

He approaches the podium, happy to see the syllabi he asked his TA’s to print out are all present and accounted for. Four large stacks of them. He’s thankful. One year his TA’s forgot to do it, which meant he had to lug over three-hundred syllabi from the staff printing room back to the hall. It was not a fun day.

“Good morning, everybody,” he says into the microphone at the podium. He waits for the students to notice him and begin to shush each other. Once the only sound is a couple of stray whispers, he continues, “I’m Professor Kurt Hummel, and this is Popular Music 101.”

He begins his introductory spiel; ten minutes on his expectations for the students and the course, how the grading works, how he will mark their attendance and participation. Once that is finished, he turns to his TA’s.

“Now, before we hand out the syllabus, I’d like to introduce you to my deputies for this semester. Blaine, Mercedes, Tina, come on up.”

The three stand up, and Mercedes confidently makes her way up to the podium. Blaine follows, which Tina coming last, looking a little hesitant.

“Hello, everybody,” Mercedes says. “I’m Mercedes Jones. I’m in my third and final year of my master’s in Music Studies, specializing in Music Education. I’m writing my thesis on the importance of music in low-income schools. This is my second year TA-ing this class for Professor Hummel, and I’m very excited to be here.”

She steps aside, allowing Blaine to come up next. He gives her the gentlest smile, and Kurt just has to look away.

“Hi,” Blaine begins. “My name is Blaine Anderson. I’m a first-year graduate student, getting my master’s in Music Business. I still haven’t decided on my thesis topic,” he sends Mercedes a wink when he says it, which somehow just makes the girl laugh and not melt into the puddle Kurt feels he is melting into. “As you can tell, I’m a little older than the other TA’s, but I promise that doesn’t mean I will be stricter on you. I also promise not to try too hard to relate to you with any cool, hip slang.”

A few people chuckle at that, and Blaine takes a step back with a bashful smile. Kurt wonders if he has literal cartoon hearts floating over his head, because it certainly feels like he does.

“Um, hello,” Tina says. “I’m Tina Cohen-Chang. Like Blaine, I’m in my first year of Music Business. Also undecided thesis. Also very excited to be here.” She steps back after that, and Blaine instantly comes up to her, putting a hand on her shoulder and rubbing it lightly. She smiles up at him, some tension clearly releasing from her body.

Kurt forces himself to look away and head back to the podium. “Just so you know, all three TA’s will have office hours once a week, and I will have office hours twice a week. Mercedes, Blaine, and Tina will have office hours Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday from 2pm to 4pm, respectively. My office hours will be Tuesday’s and Thursday’s from 10:30am to 12:30pm. Don’t worry,” he says, seeing several students frantically scribbling the information down. “I’ll send out an email later with all this information, as well as our wonderful TA’s emails.”

Once he sees a couple of understanding nods from his students, he says, “Alright, I think that’s almost everything I had planned. We’ll hand out the syllabus now, go over it briefly, and then you’re free to go.”

He nods his TA’s over, encouraging them each to take a stack of syllabi. He takes one as well, then begins the climb to the last few rows. He glances over and notices that Blaine has done the same on the other side of the hall.

He can hear Blaine quietly speaking with all the students as he hands out the packets, and really, he needs to stop doing things that make him more attractive to Kurt. Though, at this point, that seems like an impossibility. It’s becoming clear that it’s simply Blaine that Kurt is attracted to. Everything else just adds to that attraction.

Once all the syllabi are handed out, Kurt heads back to the front of the room to give a brief overview of its contents. He then asks if there’s any questions, and, after there are none, lets his students know that they are free to go.

A few students stick around to chat with Kurt, as well as with the TA’s. He can see Tina become less uncomfortable as she chats with the students one-on-one, but Blaine and Mercedes are absolute naturals.

It’s at least twenty minutes before all the students have evacuated the hall, leaving only Kurt and his TA’s.

“Need us to stick around for anything, Professor Hummel?” Mercedes asks.

“No, no, get going. Enjoy the class being over so quickly.”

Mercedes and Tina leave quickly, saying their goodbyes as they go. Blaine, frustratingly, isn’t so quick to pack up.

“I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this already,” Blaine says, slowly putting his things back into his bag. “But I’m really looking forward to working with you this semester.”

He slings his bag over his shoulders, then waves a quiet goodbye to Kurt, who stares after him like a moron.

Oh, thank god Blaine doesn’t know just how much Kurt is looking forward to working with him as well.

Chapter Four - Exclude

[roswelldetails]

Episode 102: So Much for the Afterglow - Theories

Some of these theories are totally obvious, some are just further observations based on what we definitely know. Some are just straight-up guesses! (for fun!) And some are questions because there’s always plenty of those. :)

How much did the psychic connection with Max really affect Liz? 

At the start of Episode 102, it's been a few days since Max confessed to Liz in the cave and Max wonders if Liz has been avoiding him - so she hasn't exactly been following him around town lusting after him. 

Then she tells him that she never planned to stick around - she has a grant waiting for her in San Diego. So at this point, she's not planning to stay and pine after him or anything - she's planning to just continue her life. BUT - she says she still wants to kiss him - that her feelings are real and not a "sci-fi side effect.” 

When he says she doesn't know him anymore (after ten years), she refers to him being bowlegged, into Tolstoy, and having nice handwriting for a guy - she's looking at him fondly, like a crush from high school, not someone she’s been magically induced into loving.

My theory is that even though Liz may have been able to feel Max’s emotions through their bond when he touched her, unbeknownst to Max, she already had feelings for him so nothing really changed for her. Except that she found out that her high school crush liked her back. Like, a lot.

The fact that Isobel reacts so much stronger to Max punching Michael than she did to Michael throwing Max across the room leads me to believe that Max and Isobel are at least partly aware of how hard Michael’s childhood was. They may not know the full extent of what he suffered, but they both feel protective of him. Isobel immediately recognizes that something is wrong with Max because it’s so out of character for him to hurt Michael.

Alex tells Michael the government is building a new facility on the three dairy ranches they’ve bought over so far. This is going to be a huge facility, apparently. And while it’s clear that Alex doesn’t know the significance of the location of Fosters Ranch, the government definitely does.

Perhaps the government knows that there are alien things they still haven’t found somewhere on that land. 

When Max is showing Liz his memories of Rosa, he tries to stop before they get to the memory of Rosa confronting him the night she died. But, it also seems like he put a stop to it quickly and decisively right after that. It could be that he was just worried about how Liz would interpret that last memory, OR, it could be that he has other memories of what happened to Rosa that night that he can’t let her see.

Also, Max is so gone for Liz, he’ll agree to pretty much anything she wants.

At the bar, when Isobel asks Michael to try to talk to Max about whatever is wrong with him she says, "Something is wrong with him, Michael. And when that happened the last time, you were the only one he would open up to."

So something was wrong with Max before. - probably not exactly what’s wrong with him now, but something he was upset about before, and wouldn’t talk to Isobel about.

Maybe the last time he was upset he wouldn’t talk to Isobel about it because it was her fault - she’d made Liz leave town.

Isobel seems surprised and disturbed by the fact that Michael used to spend time at the ranch waiting for someone to come get him. It seems that she isn’t as perceptive as she’s always imagined she was. There is probably quite a bit that Michael has gone through that she hasn’t noticed. (And I bet she feels - or will feel - pretty bad about that.)

Still trying to convince Michael to talk to Max, Isobel says, "Come on. This is the perfect opportunity for you guys to get over all the ugly history of the last decade and be friends again."

It seems that all of them have just spend the last 10 years feeling the consequences of whatever happened as they were graduating high school. 

The conflict between Max and Michael could be at least partly because Max went into law enforcement and Michael went into town trouble-making.

It’s almost as if Max is living in a different reality since the shooting. He accidentally tells Cam that someone was shot at the diner (but he corrects himself), he tells Isobel and Michael that Wyatt killed Liz. Even though he might be technically correct, it wasn’t the final outcome, and he can’t seem to move past it. 

The timeline for the day Rosa died so far:

Max asked Liz to go out to the desert with him to work on a bio project. (They went.)

Rosa was at the diner, but left it to go the the Wild Pony where she saw Maria. She was signing, and wrote “A fraudulent zodiac” on her hand while she was there.

At some point she came back to the diner and confronted Max.

And sometime later picked up two girls and drove her car into a tree. 

(And also got bitch-slapped by an alien.)

The fake autopsy was signed by Sheriff Jim Valenti - probably ordered to do so by Manes. So Manes likely has a good idea of what happened to Rosa that night. Or at least he knows aliens were involved somehow. 

This explains why Kyle’s dad was ranting about handprints before he died - he’d seen one on Rosa.

And who is this medical examiner who faked the autopsy anyway? Corruption abounds!!

It seems like Wyatt got a pretty good show of alien powers with a glowing hand on his chest and Max being tossed backwards through the air away from him. 

Will he remember any of it? If he does, will they just say he was drunk and didn’t know what he was seeing?

Or will he now begin to take a closer look at Max and Michael and try to figure out what’s going on with them?

Max has the strength of ten men with all the torch-carrying he’s been doing in the last 10 years. He’s been going into the diner to order coffee that he doesn’t drink and to ask Arturo how Liz is doing. 

Makes me wonder if Liz would ever ask about Max when she called her dad from time to time. Or maybe she was just super chill about it and just asked how “everyone” was doing, secretly hoping he’d mention Max.

When Michael is looking at photos in the box in his trailer, he glances down at his hand right after looking at the photo of him and Alex with their guitars. Somebody hurt Michael’s hand, making it impossible for him to play guitar anymore. Like... really hurt it. It doesn’t even look like he can fully straighten his pinky anymore.

The photo with the three people that we only see the legs of... could that be Alex, Michael, and someone else? The middle person is wearing fatigues, so it could be right before Alex went away. But the two people on the sides are the ones with the guitars, and the only people shown with guitars so far have been Alex and Michael. Could they have been standing with Master Sgt. Manes? Or maybe one of Alex’s military brothers?

Max has that symbol tattooed on his shoulder. WHY, Max? WHY?? And how did that even go down at the tattoo parlor anyway?  Max: “Hey man, I want this symbol on my shoulder.” Tattoo person: “Cool, what’s it mean?”  Max: “Uh... I don’t know. Stuff. Maybe alien stuff.”

Max, you adorable doofus.

[mill3nniumforc3]

200: My crush’s name is: Russell :) 199: I was born in: April 1994 198: I am really: energetic 197: My cellphone company is: Verizon 196: My eye color is: hazel 195: My shoe size is: 7.5-8.5, depending on the shoe 194: My ring size is: 7.5 193: My height is: 5′5″ 192: I am allergic to: penicillin, cats, pollen, and strong scents 191: My 1st car was: I’ve never owned my own car. 190: My 1st job was: babysitting. First real job was a desk job at my university 189: Last book you read: I don’t remember. I don’t have time to read for leisure. 188: My bed is: comfy 187: My pet: Seamus the miniature schnauzer and Sugar the Aussie-mo 186: My best friend: Ashlyn 185: My favorite shampoo is: Dove 184: Xbox or ps3: neither 183: Piggy banks are: for kids and rainy days 182: In my pockets: nothing 181: On my calendar: going river tubing on Saturday, party next Saturday, trip for T’s birthday weekend, and possibly going to Kennywood and Kings Island sometime in August. 180: Marriage is: something for my future self 179: Spongebob can: do anything 178: My mom: is the bestest 177: The last three songs I bought were?: who buys music anymore? 176: Last YouTube video watched: probably an ASMR video 175: How many cousins do you have?: too many to count 174: Do you have any siblings?: three sisters 173: Are your parents divorced?: no 172: Are you taller than your mom?: yep 171: Do you play an instrument?: piano, drums, bells, and I know three chords of the guitar 170: What did you do yesterday?: sleep [ I Believe In ] 169: Love at first sight: sure 168: Luck: yes 167: Fate: maybe? 166: Yourself: depends on the day 165: Aliens: not really... 164: Heaven: yes 163: Hell: Do I believe in it? Yes, because God is just. Do I believe people are damned there? No, because God is loving. 162: God: yes 161: Horoscopes: no. It’s funny to see “horoscope” posts and see if they apply to me, but it’s a bunch of b.s. A bunch of Aries aren’t going to have the same day/month/year. That’s ridiculous. 160: Soul mates: I’m not sure if I do or don’t, but I do believe in love. 159: Ghosts: no 158: Gay Marriage: of course! 157: War: it’s an unfortunate and unnecessary part of life 156: Orbs: no 155: Magic: yes [ This or That ] 154: Hugs or Kisses: both 153: Drunk or High: drunk 152: Phone or Online: online 151: Red heads or Black haired: no comment 150: Blondes or Brunettes: brunettes 149: Hot or cold: hot 148: Summer or winter: summer 147: Autumn or Spring: spring 146: Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate 145: Night or Day: night 144: Oranges or Apples: apples 143: Curly or Straight hair: straight 142: McDonalds or Burger King: McD’s (though I’m probably biased because I work there) 141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: both 140: Mac or PC: PC 139: Flip flops or high heals: flip flops 138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: sweet and poor 137: Coke or Pepsi: neither 136: Hillary or Obama: Obama 135: Burried or cremated: I want to be cremated and have my ashes buried with a seed and grow into a tree 134: Singing or Dancing: dancing 133: Coach or Chanel: neither 132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: Kat 131: Small town or Big city: small town 130: Wal-Mart or Target: Target 129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: Ben 128: Manicure or Pedicure: mani 127: East Coast or West Coast: east coast 126: Your Birthday or Christmas: Christmas. My birthday stopped being special after I turned 19. I get good food every year on Christmas. 125: Chocolate or Flowers: chocolate 124: Disney or Six Flags: Six Flags 123: Yankees or Red Sox: Indians [ Here’s What I Think About ] 122: War: What is it good for? Absolutely nothing. 121: George Bush: he had some good policies. Better than Trump, that’s for damn sure. 120: Gay Marriage: should never be illegal again. 119: The presidential election: #FuckTrump #VoteBlueNoMatterWho #ImpeachTheMF 118: Abortion: all my life, I was told to be pro-life. These days, I don’t know anymore, but I think my beliefs are closer to pro-choice than pro-life. 117: MySpace: it’s not 2008 anymore. 116: Reality TV: glad it’s not my life 115: Parents: they’re doing their best. I’m not looking to be one anytime soon though. 114: Back stabbers: bye! 113: Ebay: Amazon is better. 112: Facebook: these days, I use it to get laughs and memes. I don’t interact with people I know IRL much. 111: Work: good for the money. Not good for my mental health. 110: My Neighbors: they’re ok. 109: Gas Prices: #ThanksTrump 108: Designer Clothes: I can get good clothes at Target. The only “splurge” I do for clothes is at Spencer’s or Kohl’s. 107: College: I plan to go back soon. 106: Sports: entertaining. 105: My family: family is life. 104: The future: anything can happen [ Last time I ] 103: Hugged someone: Tuesday. 102: Last time you ate: a couple hours ago (chik’n patties and cheese) 101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: last week. I saw a manager I hadn’t worked with in like a month. 100: Cried in front of someone: Monday 99: Went to a movie theater: July 2nd 98: Took a vacation: June 97: Swam in a pool: back in February 96: Changed a diaper: I don’t remember 95: Got my nails done: way too long ago 94: Went to a wedding: in April 93: Broke a bone: 2017 (broke my toe) 92: Got a piercing: 2006 91: Broke the law: never. I’m a good person. 90: Texted: three hours ago [ MISC ] 89: Who makes you laugh the most: Russell 88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my dog 87: The last movie I saw: in theatres, Toy Story 4. At home, Adventures in Babysitting. 86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: being off on Saturday 85: The thing im not looking forward to: working tomorrow 84: People call me: Vonnie, Vonn, Bonbon, Sophia, and “the girl” 83: The most difficult thing to do is: not cry while watching Grey’s Anatomy 82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: never 81: My zodiac sign is: Aries 80: The first person i talked to today was: my sister 79: First time you had a crush: kindergarten. His name was Wally, and we were “boyfriend and girlfriend” til about third grade, and we remained friends til we graduated 8th grade. Haven’t talked to him much since. 78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: Russell 77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: Sunday 76: Right now I am talking to: nobody because it’s 3:30am 75: What are you going to do when you grow up: I hope to be teaching English education 74: I have/will get a job: I currently work at McDonald’s, but within the next 6-12 months, I’ll be moving out of state, so who knows where I’ll work.  73: Tomorrow: work 72: Today: work 71: Next Summer: I’ll be in a whole new state, so that means new amusement parks to visit and rollies to ride. 70: Next Weekend: party. Oh, and next Saturday makes officially 18 months with me and Russell, so go us! 69: I have these pets: two dogs 68: The worst sound in the world: the beeping in the headset when I work back cash. It haunts my nightmares 67: The person that makes me cry the most is: Heather because she sends me to back cash all the time 66: People that make you happy: Russell, my mom, my dogs, Ashlyn, and Aunt Dolly because she sends me lives on Candy Crush 65: Last time I cried: Monday 64: My friends are: Ashlyn, Mikayla, Jon, Rilee, Lamar, Tae, Alexus, Clare, Katie, Mario, and Kel 63: My computer is: all mine because I bought it with my own money 62: My School: not in school  61: My Car: don’t have one 60: I lose all respect for people who: lie 59: The movie I cried at was: Avengers: Endgame 58: Your hair color is: natural 57: TV shows you watch: Grey’s Anatomy, Once Upon a Time, House, The Simpsons, Bob’s Burgers, and... I don’t really watch TV because I don’t have cable. 56: Favorite web site: YouTube 55: Your dream vacation: Just a big coaster trip 54: The worst pain I was ever in was: my period this month. I had cramps for days leading up to my period that were so bad that, the day my period actually came, I couldn’t stand straight. 53: How do you like your steak cooked: I don’t eat steak 52: My room is: a mess, like my life 51: My favorite celebrity is: NPH 50: Where would you like to be: with my boyfriend 49: Do you want children: someday, but not today 48: Ever been in love: ohhh yes. 47: Who’s your best friend: not answering again 46: More guy friends or girl friends: i think i have a fair amount of both 45: One thing that makes you feel great is: this is tmi, but sex with my bf. 44: One person that you wish you could see right now: Russell 43: Do you have a 5 year plan: no 42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: yes 41: Have you pre-named your children: I don’t have any definitive names, but I’m thinking MaryGrace Linda for a girl, and James Sebastian for a boy 40: Last person I got mad at: Anna because she put me on back cash 39: I would like to move to: someplace south 38: I wish I was a professional: dancer.... no, writer.... no, why not both? [ My Favorites ] 37: Candy: peanut butter cups 36: Vehicle: Jeep 35: President: FDR 34: State visited: North Carolina (not just saying that because I lived there for two months) 33: Cellphone provider: Verizon 32: Athlete: Trevor Bauer 31: Actor: Justin Chambers 30: Actress: Amy Poehler 29: Singer: Chester Bennington 28: Band: Linkin Park 27: Clothing store: Kohl’s 26: Grocery store: Marc’s 25: TV show: Grey’s Anatomy 24: Movie: 13 Going on 30 23: Website: Pogo 22: Animal: seal 21: Theme park: Cedar Point 20: Holiday: Christmas 19: Sport to watch: baseball 18: Sport to play: softball 17: Magazine: I only read magazines at the dentist office, and I’ll read whichever has an interesting cover story 16: Book: A Series of Unfortunate Events 15: Day of the week: Saturday, as long as I’m not at work. If I’m working, then Mondays, I guess... 14: Beach: Huntington 13: Concert attended: Winter Jam, because I got to see Skillet play, and I met Matthew West. 12: Thing to cook: desserts 11: Food: eggplant parm 10: Restaurant: Olive Garden 9: Radio station: Star 102 8: Yankee candle scent: vanilla 7: Perfume: I don’t wear perfume 6: Flower: Daisies 5: Color: pink 4: Talk show host: Ellen DeGeneres 3: Comedian: Steve Rannazzisi 2: Dog breed: I really like terriers lol 1: did you answer all these truthfully ?: For me to know and you to find out :)

[quackspot]

imagine someone just going 1-200 and you have to answer 200 questions for a stranger

well u better strap up becuase im about to do it

200: My crush’s name is: i dunno who do u think my crush’s name is199: I was born in: a year which is 2004198: I am really: a homo sapien197: My cellphone company is:  i think its samsung196: My eye color is: brown195: My shoe size is: 9 or 9.5 i think just 9194: My ring size is: WAIT RINGS HAD SIZES????? i dunno193: My height is: 5′4 ISH but i just say 5′4 because im actually really sensitive about my height and the less than an inch that brings me to 5′4 makes me somewhat happier with myself192: I am allergic to: maybe dustmites 191: My 1st car was: not yet190: My 1st job was: NOT YET189: Last book you read: technically a book called Dad Jokes theyre really funny jokes but if you mean story with plot then probably Grand & Humble unless if you include everything then yesterday i peeked in some books188: My bed is: a bed which i sleep in and that’s pretty much it actually i havent really made my bed in a while 187: My pet: jax and nibsy r the family pets jax is a shih-poo shihtzu poodle mix and nibsy is a cat186: My best friend: my brother185: My favorite shampoo is: shampoo184: Xbox or ps3: hard choice there’s xbox overall and little big planet this is actually a very hard choice lksiiro3jedsklmf,gsda little big planet is great........................183: Piggy banks are: piggy banks. theyre great182: In my pockets: I DONT HAVE POCKETS IM A WOMAN181: On my calendar: whats a calendar lol!!!!180: Marriage is: marriage 179: Spongebob can: dodod od odo dodooo178: My mom: IS GREAT i lov her shes a good mom177: The last three songs I bought were? i dont buy songs i listen to them176: Last YouTube video watched: i mean im listening to boyfriend big time rush on youtube right now but if you mean actual watching its snufkin saying “hi moomin” to moomin a quick 6 second clip175: How many cousins do you have? i duno174: Do you have any siblings? yeah173: Are your parents divorced? yeah172: Are you taller than your mom? probably not :(171: Do you play an instrument? i play the trumpet i did it today and it was really boring i dont want to go to any more graduations not even my own170: What did you do yesterday? things[ I Believe In ]169: Love at first sight: not really but somewhat and i like it because its a fun little thing to put in fiction 168: Luck: yea im very lucky167: Fate: its my destiny to die someday . . .. .  in the futuuuuuuuuuuure

166: Yourself: as far as im aware no165: Aliens: yeah probably164: Heaven: i know it probably isnt real but i cant help believing163: Hell:i know it probably isnt real but i cant help believing162: God: only to blame them for stuff161: Horoscopes: yea theyre fun to read160: Soul mates: ehehehehehhe fun in fanfiction and would greatly b ok with it irl159: Ghosts: who else would hold my hand at night...... not even a ghost :) (but yea i do believe in them when i grow up i wana be a ghost)158: Gay Marriage: why wouldnt i believe in gay marriage 157: War: what is it good for156: Orbs: borb155: Magic: i like magic so i will believe in it [ This or That ]154: Hugs or Kisses: yes153: Drunk or High: probably high i guess152: Phone or Online: ONLINE151: Red heads or Black haired: black haired 150: Blondes or Brunettes: BRUNETTES dude blondes r ok but i personally like darker hair149: Hot or cold: hot148: Summer or winter: SUMMER I HATE WINTER SO FUCKIGNT OASJKU*($@IRWJKOSDIUOKLJEZUDIFLK:LDSK:LKF:LJIODSKZVDJFKL mostly becuase i hate being cold and i hate snow becuase i have to shovel snow and its so cold147: Autumn or Spring: either one 146: Chocolate or vanilla: choc o late145: Night or Day: night144: Oranges or Apples: apples143: Curly or Straight hair: curly but i guess straight is ok142: McDonalds or Burger King: burbger king good milkshakese141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: idk uhh milk chocolate140: Mac or PC: pc139: Flip flops or high heals: neither......138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: ugly and rich i can just buy surgeries to make me prettier lmao137: Coke or Pepsi: coke136: Hillary or Obama: i dont wanna answer this :(((((( i dont like being bullied135: Burried or cremated: cremated babye put me in the flames ;3c134: Singing or Dancing: i like singing i like dancing i like trains 133: Coach or Chanel: what132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: who are these people131: Small town or Big city: im just a mere small town babye ;3c big cities sound scary 130: Wal-Mart or Target: target has the good cheeseballs129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: i only know adam sandler128: Manicure or Pedicure: i dont do my nails 127: East Coast or West Coast: uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhh both are coasts126: Your Birthday or Christmas: birthday i get more gifts then uwu125: Chocolate or Flowers: chocolate124: Disney or Six Flags: disney because idk what six flags is isnt it a restaurant or something123: Yankees or Red Sox: a baseball bat [ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: what is it good for!121: George Bush: idk 120: Gay Marriage: yeah gay rights119: The presidential election: im not that into politics so i dont understand the elections and i dont think their fair since i get all my facts from adam ruins everything this isnt even a joke118: Abortion: pro choice i dont giv a crap about some lifeless baby. its only alive if it can properly move its arms or cry or feel.117: MySpace: haha dead116: Reality TV: idk 115: Parents: theyre parents 114: Back stabbers: ow my back113: Ebay: website.... money112: Facebook: lizard man111: Work: what110: My Neighbors: idk who they are but my old neighbor was one of my best friends i should talk to him this summer109: Gas Prices: probably too high108: Designer Clothes: clothes107: College: something i dont plan on going to any time soon106: Sports: something i dont plan on doing any time soon105: My family: a family104: The future: spooky. very scary. idk what my job will be[ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: idk (update it was today)102: Last time you ate: 4:13 ish i made ramne101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: i duno100: Cried in front of someone: today i suppose i almost cried???? maybe my dentist appointment a few weeks ago??99: Went to a movie theater: lego movie 2 i think98: Took a vacation: 6th grade im in 9th grade now its been like 3 years97: Swam in a pool: over 1 year i dont go to the pool anymore96: Changed a diaper: NEVER AND I NEVER PLAN ON IT95: Got my nails done: i duno94: Went to a wedding: i also dunno its been too long93: Broke a bone: not that i can recal92: Got a peircing: never and never will91: Broke the law: i duno90: Texted: just now i told my mommy to pick me up it wasl ike 1 hour ago[ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: me88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: my momy and nibsy and jax and probably zach but he’d already move out by the time i leave87: The last movie I saw: i dont remember probably lego movie 2 or osmething on tv86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: next year drama club85: The thing im not looking forward to: dying?????? idk man 84: People call me: moto moto (not really idk what they call me)83: The most difficult thing to do is: the most difficult thing82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: never though i probs will someday81: My zodiac sign is: aquarius sun leo moon aries rising80: The first person i talked to today was: probably kiley79: First time you had a crush: kindergarten i think78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: myself77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: idk76: Right now I am talking to: nobody 75: What are you going to do when you grow up: *has a crisis over my future plans as i do not know*74: I have/will get a job: im gona work at target or burger king next year maybe it depends on if they like me73: Tomorrow: 5/20..............72: Today: today71: Next Summer: in a theater near u70: Next Weekend: my first summer weekend 69: I have these pets: I ALREAD YSAID WHAT PETS I HAVE I LOVE NIBSY WITH ALL MY HEART and jax with some extra parts of my heart68: The worst sound in the world: a sound67: The person that makes me cry the most is: me66: People that make you happy: me65: Last time I cried: ealier today64: My friends are: online63: My computer is: on62: My School: is a school61: My Car: nonexistent 60: I lose all respect for people who: are really mean and seem to hate people for being happy. people who make jokes that make me uncomfortable. i generally avoid them.59: The movie I cried at was: all of them58: Your hair color is: brown57: TV shows you watch: idk56: Favorite web site: idk probs youtube55: Your dream vacation: nowhere 54: The worst pain I was ever in was: A FEW WEEKS AGO I GOT STITCHES IN MY MOUTH AND IT REALLY HURT UGHGTUERIJOKFLDc53: How do you like your steak cooked: edible52: My room is: a room51: My favorite celebrity is: myslef..... just kidding idk any celebs 50: Where would you like to be: where i am 49: Do you want children: no 48: Ever been in love: hoo ha hoo ha i duno how love feels exactly47: Who’s your best friend: MY BROTHER46: More guy friends or girl friends: guys i think 99% of my friends are my brothers friends so45: One thing that makes you feel great is: being happy44: One person that you wish you could see right now: nobody right now but sometimes kiley43: Do you have a 5 year plan: 5 years??? haha no i only plan on using savings accounts to make a bit more money and MAYBE moving to kiley but idk for sure since i like my parents and my brother and my parents plan on driving around in an rv but idk man moving to another state would be HARD and im kinda lazy and i’d have to get a whole new driver’s license 42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: no41: Have you pre-named your children: lmao all my ideas are jokes40: Last person I got mad at: probably myslef39: I would like to move to: my bed???????38: I wish I was a professional: personer. talker. socialer. [ My Favorites ]37: Candy: probably snickers or a salted nut roll36: Vehicle: big car. tahoe shape. tahoe size. idk. something like a tahoe thats my only reference35: President: I Don’t Care34: State visited: probably florida its the only one of 3 states i’ve been to33: Cellphone provider: what32: Athlete: WHAT31: Actor: idk 30: Actress: idk29: Singer: not me? me? idk28: Band: taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaally hall??? ? ?? ? ?? ? ? ? I DONT KNOWIJ DSKJZLFKSJKLDSHDLfjklskl;fdkl;sfk;laf 27: Clothing store: i legit have like no faves god this is the hardest part26: Grocery store: target probably25: TV show: maybe the simpsons???24: Movie: idk ive seen a lot of movies23: Website: one of them22: Animal: one of them21: Theme park: universal studios20: Holiday: none of them theyre all ok but ??? meh19: Sport to watch: none.18: Sport to play: idk i dont like being competitive but??????? gym class is a fun sport! :)17: Magazine: none of them16: Book: one of them15: Day of the week: wednesday sounds like a good day. maybe sundays. 14: Beach: what13: Concert attended: frankly the only concerts i’ve been to are my own12: Thing to cook: probably ramen11: Food: cheeseballs??????? burger king milkshake, a drink?10: Restaurant: buuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrger kiiiiiiiiiiing?9: Radio station: 101.9 kelo eff emmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm8: Yankee candle scent: what7: Perfume: what6: Flower: what5: Color: red or purple4: Talk show host: wha

3: Comedian: i duno2: Dog breed: one of them1: Did you answer all these truthfully?  yeah i tried but i kinda gave up slightly after i came back from a graduation party though i also kind of gave up from the start so

[gobigorgohome2016]

Taper Week 1 + Final Big Workout

I am in the home stretch, which is strange because I’m feeling very different from other marathon training cycles.  

Normally at this point, I am plotting out exactly what I am going to do as soon as I cross the finish line:  drink a beer, eat a burger, and not engage in any physical activity for a glorious 14 days.  Last year, the US half marathon championships couldn’t come soon enough.  Even on the starting line, all I could think about was covering 13.1 miles as quickly as possible solely so that I could take a break.  Definitely not the right mindset for running your best! 

Traditionally, taper has been hard for me.  Not from the standpoint of “taper crazies”  - I’m not going to lie, when people complain about running less I just don’t get it.  At the same time, my taper is relatively small.  I ran 108 miles for my peak week, and last week I ran 92 (which includes one day off).  When you track my 7 day stretch from Tuesday to Monday, I still covered 102 miles.  This week will be lower, though, coming in at 76.  It will be weird to only run once per day most of the week.  Actually, today was my first single run in weeks and I felt like I had infinitely more time on my hands!  Of course that means I was less productive, because the best way to get things done is to be really busy, amirite?  

I’m starting to wonder if my early season setbacks will have actually served a greater purpose.  I feel like the last few weeks have been a turning point in my fitness and that things are coming together.  About 4 weeks ago I was running a warm up and I thought to myself you need to just be okay with the fact this might not be a PR training cycle.  After I had that thought, I wound up running a better-than-expected workout and I feel like I’ve been on the up and up ever since.  I’m not sure I have ever made it to this point in training feeling as though my legs are still fresh.  

On Sunday I did what I love to do during taper:  I pored over my running logs and looked at data.  I love to look at my mileage totals.  Here is my mileage during the same 92 day periods leading up to each race:

Twin Cities:  1,019 miles Olympic Trials:  1,163 miles Pittsburgh:  1,147 miles

At the end of the day, I will have only run 16 fewer miles than I did in the 3 months leading up to the Trials.  That doesn’t tell the whole story, though.  That training window includes a 3 week period where I was dealing with a hamstring issue.  If we look at the final 6 weeks of training, the mileage totals are slightly different:

Twin Cities:  505 miles Olympic Trials: 554 miles Pittsburgh:  565 miles

I have definitely come on stronger the last few weeks whereas in past training, I have struggled during taper to have motivation to run.  At the end of the day, training and racing only produces more data, so it will be interesting for me to see how the increased mileage plays a role in the outcome.  

I’m in the process of reading Deena Kastor’s Let Your Mind Run.  This book could not have come out at a better time for me.  I like to read during taper.  Before Twin Cities, I read Once a Runner.  Before the Trials, I read Suzy Favor Hamilton’s Fast Girl.  

Deena’s positivity has helped me look at the last few months and reframe them.  At one point I truthfully wondered why I was bothering to run this marathon when it didn’t seem like I was going to be in my best shape.  I will be the first to admit that I struggle at times with perfectionism when it comes to running (seriously nothing else though.  sometimes I wonder how I graduated college).  Something that tremendously helped was when my coach reminded me this race doesn’t have to be perfect - it just has to be good, I’m already a pretty damn good runner.  

Deena’s book inspired me to reframe a lot of the negative thoughts that have been holding me back lately.  For instance, I have used one word to describe this training cycle:  setback.  I’m pretty sure I have uttered that word more times in the last 4 months than I have in my entire life.  Instead of thinking about the things that have hindered progress, why not think of them as things I have overcome?  At the end of the day, I have run a shit ton of miles after dealing with:

-a calf injury -a plantar injury -a hamstring injury -a badly infected blister -a couple illnesses -a post-tib issue -the worst case of eczema I’ve experienced in my 20′s -unmet expectations at races  -new food sensitivities that undoubtedly contributed to the previous 8 items on this list

I prevailed despite all of these things.  What’s so hard about a marathon after your toe doubles in size because it is infected and is so painful  you have to drive barefoot in the middle of winter because your shoe is applying too much painful pressure on your toe when you hit the gas pedal? 

Deena’s book is also helping me see the other things I do - the things that are easy to forget - that make me a better athlete.  Joe Vigil has a quote that there is no such thing as overtraining, just underresting.  I love that.  This training cycle I have made it a point to:

-nap at least 60 minutes every day  -eliminate foods that I know my body cannot tolerate (science is cool) -get a massage every 2 weeks -set up mental game sessions as needed -have increased contact with my coach -make dietitian appointments as needed -make visualization a priority -do daily yoga instead of one session per week -more core/lifting -practice race day [this training cycle I made it a point to practice getting up at 4 AM before a couple long run workouts so that I wasn’t in shock when I had to do it for the race]

There is no guarantee that any of these things are going to make a better runner; but, there was something that Des Linden said leading up to Boston that spoke to me:  I could live with myself if I didn’t win Boston.  I decided I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t try.  (referring to her training)

If I don’t reach my ultimate goal of breaking 2:30 in the marathon, I’ll live.  But, as long as I am training I will have a hard time not doing everything in my power that I know will contribute to success.  I often think of my mom telling me in high school (when I was half-assing my assignments) “if it’s a job worth doing, it’s a job worth doing well.”    

The past week of workouts has been good.  I’m not sure where the notion came from that taper weeks are easy.  In reality, the lower mileage gives way to more intensity.  Here’s what my week looked like:

M:  off (first dasy off in 6 weeks!) T: AM:  4, PM:  12 mi total w/ 6 x mi @ marathon effort ending with a mile at half marathon effort W:  AM:  10, PM:  6 Th:  AM:  6 x 400 m @ mile race pace w/ full recovery, PM:  7 F:  AM:  10, PM:  5 Sa:  AM:  8, PM:  5 Su:  AM:  16 mi cut down finishing in 5:44; PM:  4 mi shake out

Total for the week was 92, and I’m really happy with how my legs felt during that cut down.  I remember that workout before Twin Cities and crawling through the shake out later in the day because my legs were trashed.  The biggest difference I have noticed during the past 4 or 5 weeks is that my legs are recovering really well.

Today was my last big workout, and it was actually one I have never done before!  The plan was 3 x 15:00 at threshold pace.  While there is little fitness to be gained at this point, I’m so glad I did this workout because it was a huge mental win.  

I went to the tow path for the workout, which is a crushed limestone path in Indy.  I figured 15:00 should be roughly 2.5 miles.  My plan was to do a 2.5 mi stretch, then a 2.5 mi loop through a neighborhood, then the 2.5 mi stretch back.  I did not account for how much rain we have had lately, and the tow path was a muddy, sloppy, puddle-dotted mess.  We also have had pretty cold weather, so today was quite the contrast with 60 degrees and 100% humidity / light rain.  Fun fact:  I have run in a sports bra and shorts once this year, and that was in February.  

My superhero running strength is that I’m really good at not going out too fast, and at progressively picking up the pace in workouts as I go.  Actually, when this doesn’t happen I generally know something might be wrong with me.  Today was not that day.  

My first mile of my first 15:00 was 5:49.  This is not my threshold pace on a perfect weather day, and it’s definitely not my threshold pace on wet, muddy, soggy ground when I am slipping and sliding everywhere.  My second mile was 5:46.  I wound up covering 2.57 mi in 15:00 minutes.  

My fatal flaw as a runner is that, when I see these splits, I feel as though I must continue getting faster.  not the point of this workout.  So, I convinced myself that I needed to slow down.  

My first mile was 5:52 of the second 15:00 tempo.  Honestly, my legs felt like garbage.  I was running through a neighborhood on completely soaked streets trying to make turns and I ran way too hard in my previous effort.  My quads felt like crap.  My 2nd mile was 6:00.  I panicked.  Quads are heavy + slowing down.  When was the last time I felt this way?  Oh, right, when I was anemic in the fall.  At 12:00 I just stopped running.  I contemplated calling it a day and jogging back to my car.  Actually, I convinced myself that was what I should do.  If my quads are heavy, why add extra strain?  Then I spiraled.  What if I feel this way during the marathon and just walk off the course?  

Finally I decided I was going to finish the workout no matter what, even if it meant running 6:30 pace.  I took a couple minutes to regroup and decided the final tempo would be 18:00, to account for the 3 that I missed when I cut the second one short.  I would start slow (closer to my actual threshold pace), and no matter what stick this one out.  First mile:  6:07.  Much better.  Second mile:  6:02.  3rd mile:  5:55.  So, I made a workout that wasn’t supposed to be hard much more difficult than it had to be.  

But, I’m happy that it happened that way.  It is very rare for me to have a bad day in practice.  It’s even rarer for me to stop.  I don’t get a lot of opportunities to practice bringing it back around and making the day successful.  Having at least one experience like this going into the marathon is important, because if there is anything we’ve learned in the past 10 days, it’s that you can think you’re going to drop out of a race at half way, then find yourself becoming the first American in 33 years to win the Boston marathon.  

[arteacactus]

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 78, 69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75, 76, 77, 78, 79, 80, 81, 82, 83, 84, 85, 86, 87, 88, 89, 90, 91, 92, 93, 94, 95, 96, 97, 98, 99, 100, 101, 102, 103, 104, 105, 106, 107, 108, 109, 110, 111, 112, 113, 114, 115, 116, and 117 :D

pFF okay these are going under a cut-

1: Let’s start with a tricky one; what is the real reason you are confused right now?

Honestly I’m not confused at this moment so let’s go for like.. confused in general

I?? would date females?? they are cute? i have crushed on females before??? and yet i still like.. feel more attracted to men and feel like im straight? idk if this is???? a thing??????? i know my mom is attracted to some females romantically too so i just assume its a thing for straight people idfk sexuality is so fucking confusing ajhflkjsl

2: Do you ever get “good morning” texts from anyone?

Nope!

3: If your significant other smoked pot, would you care?

Yeah, I think I would? idk it makes me uncomfortable 

4: Do you find it easy to trust others?

Honestly? I feel like i shouldn’t but i do anyway

5: What were you doing at 11PM last night?

Falling asleep to Full House on the hotel tv ^^

6: You’re drunk and lost walking down the road; who is with you?

Probably some stray cat I picked up along the way and claimed as my own

7: What would you do if you found out you had been cheated on?

It would probably be really heartbreaking to be perfectly honest. Like, putting your love and trust into this person, willingly placing your heart into their hands, and they toss it away as if it had no real meaning to them. Idk what I would do, probably cry? Break up? im not sure what one would do in that situation

8: Are you close with your dad?

Yee!!

9: I bet you kissed someone last night, right?

Nopeo. Unless we’re talking on the cheek. My mom is very affectionate. She attacks us with hugs.

But if you’re talking romantically, I have never had a kiss, ever

10: What are you listening to?

Right now? The fan on my laptop and the clicking of the keys on my keyboard. I have no music on lol

11: You can only drink ONE liquid for the rest of your life - what is it?

Water. OOOO or bubble tea. prolly bubble tea

12: Do you like hickeys?

Noo ive never gotten one but nooo

13: What time do you go to bed?

Usually? 4-5am

14: Is there someone who continuously lets you down?

Not really?? 

15: Can you text as quickly with one hand as you do both?

Nah. I’m half-speed with just one thumb

16: Do you always answer your texts?

Sometimes I don’t know how to reply, or don’t have the energy to, so no ^^

17: Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for?

The person I fell the hardest for is Thomas Sanders

take a good look at my profile and tell me if that seems like hatred to you

18: When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends?

Couple hours ago ^^

19: Is there someone that makes you happy every time you see them?

Yes!!! I don’t see them physically but @fandergecko, @an-anxious-acquaintance, y o u, @underagecatnip- yeah im not gonna list them all that would take far too long but if ive ever spoken to them, i get so happy to see em

20: What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?

I dunno. i was singing along mentally to Bubblegum Bitch, so

21: Is anyone else in the room with you?

I mean... Not physically. I hope not

22: Do you believe what goes around comes around?

Im gonna be perfectly honest when I say i have no fucking clue what this saying even means

23: Were you happier four months ago than you are now?

No, not really?

24: Is there someone you wish you could fix things with?

Yeah.

25: In the past week, have you cried?

I?? think????????? maybe. i got chlorine in my eyes that made me tear up

26: What colour is the shirt you are wearing?

Black! (and gray and white and green and red blue-)

27: Do people ever call you by your last name?

Nope

28: Is anyone ignoring you right now?

mmaybe? I guess I wouldn’t know lol

29: Do you have a best friend?

Ye!! Multiple!

30: Would it be hard seeing someone else kiss the last person you kissed?

I have never kissed anyone. so. no-

31: Who was your last call/text message from?

Like proper text message? I havent had one in months 

Last call was from my mom

32: Are you mad at anyone?

nnno? I mean, sean is being a little shit and mark is putting his health in danger so im kinda salty but thats the usual

33: Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

nopee

34: How old will the last person you kissed be on his/her next birthday?

i dunno my dude

35: How many more days until your birthday?

aHHH

-googles it-

317

36: Do you have any summer plans yet?

Yep! Fourth of July party, tubing trip, Graduation party, possible trips to my grandmother’s, that’s about it

37: Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex?

Ummmmmmm

I believe? I’m gonna be totally honest and say males do tend to freak me out a bit. I have an irrational fear of guys, so i have no real irl friends that are dudes

38: Are you keeping anything from your best friend(s) now?

i dont think so?

39: Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone?

i just thought of one, but then i realized, nope, i told it to my friends, dammit

uh

i cannot keep secrets to save my life, i had an anxiety attack the last time i tried to hold a secret. Lasted maybe a month before I broke down in tears because of my guilty conscious. I cannot keep secrets

40: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?

still never kissed anyone my guy

41: Do you think age matters in relationships?

YES

42: Are you available?

I am available in the sense that i am single, but not in the sense i am looking for anyone lol

43: How many people have you had real, strong feelings for since high school ended?

Im still in it my dude

44: If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get?

I already have ear piercings so-

Probably like.. nose piercing? or eyebrow? idk

45: Do you believe exes can be friends?

Yeah!!! My divorced parents are living proof of that! My mom, her husband, and my dad just got back from a vacation together. Everyone’s very close!!

46: Do you regret anything?

I regret how I handled some past things.

47: Honestly, what’s on your mind right now?

Multiple things, lemme list em-

1. The cheetos i have next to me

2. How I really wish I could be less of a fucking douche all the time

3. Katy Perry’s song ‘Peacock’

4. Thomas Sanders

48: Did you ever lose a best friend?

No ^^

49: Was your last kiss a mistake?

I mean.. it wasnt anyone-

50: Why aren’t you pursuing the person you like?

WELL FRIEND

1. He’s 29

2. He’s gay

3. He lives in Florida

4. HE’S 29

51: Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry?

i feel like a lot of these are not for me considering ive never kissed anyone

52: Do you still talk with the person you LAST kissed?

technically i last kissed the spoon of crofters in my living room. no

53: What was the last thing you ate?

Cheetos!!

54: Did you get any compliments today?

Yep ^^

55: Where are you going on your next vacation?

Tubing trip bitches im ready to see my family get drunk at 12 in the afternoon and push each other in the river while blaring country music

56: Do you own anything from other countries?

I mean. All my items are from china, basically-

57: Are most of your friend guys or girls?

Girls ^^ But I have a lot of non-binary friends too!!

58: Where have you lived most of your life?

Michigan, the Lake-y Hell(tm)

59: When was the last time you took a long drive?

Roughly six hours ago

60: Have you ever played Spin the Bottle?

Nopee

61: Have you ever TPd someone’s house?

Nuh-uh!

62: Who do you text the most?

@underagecatnip ^^

63: What was the last movie you saw?

Oof, um.. I think it was Black Panther

64: What’s preventing your current boyfriend/girlfriend from going back to their ex?

The fact I never had one is a pretty huge thing

65: How many boyfriends/girlfriends did you have in 2011?

2011..? Let’s see, I was.. what, 8 years old? so none

66: Is the last person you kissed younger than you?

its a spoonful of crofters-

67: Do you curse around your parents?

Nah, not allowed to curse until I move out ^^

68: Are you happy with where you live?

Ye!

69: Picture of yourself?

70: Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships?

I believe in open-ended relationships!! Why not?

71: Have you ever been dumped?

Never dated, so nope ^^

72: What do you most like about making out?

Picturing it being done very angrily between Roman and Logan-

73: Have you ever casually made out with someone who you weren’t seriously involved with?

Nop

74: When you kiss someone for the first time, is it usually you who initiates it or the other?

I mean it’ll hopefully be me when it does happen, I hate not having control in situations-

75: What part of a person’s body do you find most attractive?

Hair? Usually??? like if they have floofy hair im like n i c e and if its purple im like n I C E and if its swooshy and soft-looking im like N I C E and if its on the head of thomas sanders im like N   I    C    E 

76: Who was the last person you talked to last night before you went to bed?

My dad, cause he was the last one awake in the hotel room lol

77: Had sex with someone you knew less than an hour?

Boi, I’ve never dated,, never kissed,,, im 15- do you really think i’d have sex

78: Had sex with someone you didn’t know their name?

n o p e

79: What makes your heart flutter and brings a big cheesy smile to your face?

logince-

80: Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already?

I mean?? idk?????? maybe

81: Has someone who had a crush on you ever confessed to you?

Actually yes!! But after it was long gone lol

82: Do you tell a lot of people when you have a crush?

I love to announce it and ramble on about it, yes. I love bringing it to attention. i’m like Roman

83: Do you miss your last sweetie?

Yes he was a very good bunny i loved him sm his name was Swiss Roll

84: Last time you slow danced with someone?

never have

85: Have you ever ‘dated’ someone you’ve never met?

Nah

86: How can I win your heart?

Don’t be a little bitch-

87: What is your astrological sign?

Pisces! I’m a fuschia blood!!

88: What were you doing last night at 12 AM?

Sleepin

89: Do you cook?

Nooo-

90: Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication?

Nope

91: If you’re single right now, do you wish you were in a relationship?

Not really? I guess it would depend on the person, if we’re talking in general then not at all, but if it’s someone I have crushed/am currently crushing on, then it’d be great, cause I know them and their personality and yeah keep in mind he’s 29 and gay, me

92: Do you prefer to date various people or do you pretty much fall into monogamous relationships quickly?

Idk??? never done eITHER-

93: What physical traits do you look for in a potential interest?

Brown eyes cause I’m weirdly attracted to people with brown eyes

94: Name four things that you wish you had!

1. Sleep

2. Motivation

3. Intelligence

4. a pair of socks would be nice

95: Are you a player?

Yes I play a lot of video games, such as Minecraft-

96: Have you ever kissed 2 people in one day?

I once kissed my mom on the cheek and then my cat’s head

97: Are you a tease?

I tease a lot about future fics yes

98: Ever meet anyone you met on Tumblr?

No!! and that makes me sad!!!! i wanna meet themmm

99: Have you ever been deeply in love with someone?

Apparently I was in genuine love with Thomas Sanders, idfk i cant identify these things

100: Anybody on Tumblr that you’d go on a date with?

I have listed these before but like.. crankgameplays, markiplier, therealjacksepticeye, thatsthat24, tallykat3, thejoanglebook-

101: Hugs or Kisses?

Hugs!!

102: Are you too shy to ask someone out?

Oh yeah i would be 10000%

103: The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?

Hair, usually

104: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you babe?

Personally I find it creepy unless said in like.. a joking kind of way

105: If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was in relationship, would you go for it?

No?? why would you even

106: Do you flirt a lot?

I’ve been told I do unintentionally. i’m sorry

107: Your last kiss?

My cat’s fuzzy lil head

108: Have you kissed more than 5 people since the start of 2012?

I’ve kissed so many cute animals dude

109: Have you kissed anyone in the past month?

My cat!!

110: If you could kiss anyone who would it be?

Are we talking real people cause I would love to smooch a newfoundland doggo

I mean, probably thomas cause ive fallen pretty hard for him

111: Do you know who you’ll kiss next?

My cat-

112: Does someone like you currently?

I?? dunno?????? like i really do not know nobody tells me s o

113: Do you currently have feelings for anyone?

ThOmAs SaNdErS (HoNk :o))

114: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings?

serious relationships preferably

115: Ever made out with just a friend?

nopeo

116: Are you happier single or in a relationship?

I’ve only ever been single, sooo-

117: Your own question that you want me to answer. Just write it.

You didn’t give me a question to answer, so i’m just gonna say I love Thomas Sanders fuck the world

[disabilitymissunderstood]

welp you guys been requesting me to do one, so here i did! enjoy!

1: Full name

Amy)I prefer alex) Kathrine 

2: Age/20

3: 3 Fears

men(i am working on it), small spaces and being forgotten

4: 3 things I love

animals, music, baking/cooking

5: 4 turns on

being held, kissing, hugging, and smiling

6: 4 turns off

yelling, being lied too, betrayal, being mean

7: My best friend

my dog

8: Sexual orientation

 g-a-y (remember i am both genders)

9: My best first date

never been on  a date D:

10: How tall am I

5′4 i am short :c

11: What do I miss

the old me, and my brother Micheal.

12: What time were I born

in the morning (dont know the time)

13: Favourite color

 red, black, grey, and white

14: Do I have a crush

yesss

15: Favorite quote

“people don’t die from suicide, they die from sadness”

16: Favourite place 

library, hot topic, humane society, pet-co/pet smart, cuddling with Gracie, in bed.

17: Favourite food

 pastaa and rice

18: Do I use sarcasm

A L W A Y S

19: What am I listening to right now

 never to late by three days grace

20: First thing I notice in new person

 there attitude 

21: Shoe size/ 8

22: Eye color/  B R O W N

23: Hair color/ B R O W N

24: Favourite style of clothing

anything from Hot topic/spencers

25: Ever done a prank call?

maybe when i was younger??

27: Meaning behind my URL/

i am disabled and just wanna let others that are aswell its okay to be different, you’re not alone<3

28: Favourite movie/ dogs purpose

29: Favourite song/ to many

30: Favourite band/ lots

31: How I feel right now

my neck is killing me >:(

32: Someone I love/ my dog

33: My current relationship status/ S I N G L E

34: My relationship with my parents/ good?

35: Favorite holiday

Christmas, thanksgiving, and Halloween

36: Tattoos and piercing i have

 piercings- my boobs, my septum and my ears (i plan on getting more) and tattoos i haven’t gotten around yet

37: Tattoos and piercing i want/ check my blog

38: The reason I joined Tumblr

just to have a place to express my feelings and likes

39: Do I and my last ex hate each other?

Y E S 

40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts?

Sometimes

41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted?

yesss

42: When did I last hold hands?

yesterday!

43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning?

like 10 mins

44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days?

yus

45: Where am I right now?

in bed

46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me?

my brothers

47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level?

loud

48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad?

currently living w my mom but i am going to be moving into my apartment soon!

49: Am I excited for anything?

moving into my apartment soon! also applying for college soon!

50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to?

yes!

51: How often do I wear a fake smile?

L O T S 

52: When was the last time I hugged someone?

today

53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me?

i would be balling rn

54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not?

yes

55: What is something I disliked about today?

nothing

56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?

mmm good question, probably ronnie radke

57: What do I think about most?

my future and sometimes my past...

58: What’s my strangest talent?

breathing

59: Do I have any strange phobias?

small places

60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?

some days behind it, others in front of it

61: What was the last lie I told?

mmmmm im not sure

62: Do I perfer talking on the phone or video chatting online?

texting

63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

yes yes

64: Do I believe in magic?

yes

65: Do I believe in luck?

for other people? yes, but for me? no

66: What’s the weather like right now?

its storming (rain and thunder)

67: What was the last book I’ve read?

fifty shades of grey ^_^

68: Do I like the smell of gasoline?

yes ;,,,,;

69: Do I have any nicknames?

little one, poobear, princess

70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had?

cut on my neck, deep scar on my arm, and my head

71: Do I spend money or save it?

save it 

72: Can I touch my nose with a tounge?

no

73: Is there anything pink in 10 feets from me?

no

74: Favourite animal?

slothes are so cute! (i generally don’t have a favorite animal i love all)

75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM?

watching netflix

76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is?

mmm don’t know

77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it?

sunflower by post malone

78: How can you win my heart?

by me food and show me u actually love me

79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone?

“she was a hero”

80: What is my favorite word?

F U C K

81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr

@foodie4ever @tropiclyy @sadviolences @traaumaa @beyondbrokenvixi

82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say?

fuck you T R U  M P

83: Do I have any relatives in jail?

don’t know

84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power?

let me fly xD

85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on?

good question, i am not sure.

86: What is my current desktop picture?

my dog

87: Had sex?

Y E S

88: Bought condoms?

mhm

89: Gotten pregnant?

almost

90: Failed a class?

yes :)

91: Kissed a boy?

yes 

92: Kissed a girl?

yus

93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain?

yes

94: Had job?

yes

95: Left the house without my wallet?

many times lmao

96: Bullied someone on the internet?

never

97: Had sex in public?

god no

98: Played on a sports team?

yes

99: Smoked weed?

yes 

100: Did drugs?

yes

101: Smoked cigarettes?

yes

102: Drank alcohol?

yes

103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan?

V E G A N

104: Been overweight?

yes but currently trying to lose it!

105: Been underweight?

i used to be skinny...(used to be anorexic)

106: Been to a wedding?

yes

107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight?

yes

108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight?

yes

109: Been outside my home country?

yes

110: Gotten my heart broken?

many times

111: Been to a professional sports game?

yes

112: Broken a bone?

yes

113: Cut myself?

i still struggle with it..

114: Been to prom?

no

115: Been in airplane?

yes

116: Fly by helicopter?

yes

117: What concerts have I been to?

marianatrench, post malone, nickleback, miley cyrus, and justin bieber-

118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex?

yes

119: Learned another language?

yes

120: Wore make up?

still do

121: Lost my virginity before I was 18?

yes

122: Had oral sex?

yes

123: Dyed my hair?

many times

124: Voted in a presidential election?

yes

125: Rode in an ambulance?

yes

126: Had a surgery?

yes

127: Met someone famous?

yes

128: Stalked someone on a social network?

god no

129: Peed outside?

camping...

130: Been fishing?

love it

131: Helped with charity?

always

132: Been rejected by a crush?

yes

133: Broken a mirror?

yes

134: What do I want for birthday?

happinesss

135: How many kids do I want and what will be their names?

i want atleast 4 or 6..

136: Was I named after anyone?

my grandfather(my dads dad) mother

137: Do I like my handwriting?

sure

138: What was my favourite toy as a child?

barbie

139: Favourite Tv Show?

IZombie and big mouth

140: Where do I want to live when older?

in the country.

141: Play any musical instrument?

piano and drums

142: One of my scars, how did I get it?

self-harm

143: Favourite pizza toping?

everything that isn’t meat

144: Am I afraid of the dark?

nah

145: Am I afraid of heights?

yes

146: Have I ever got caught sneaking out or doing anything bad?

when i was 12

147: Have I ever tried my hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?

yes

148: What I’m really bad at

not yelling

149: What my greatest achievments are

graduating treatment 

150: The meanest thing somebody has ever said to me

“hey, i fucked your dead brother last night” ( a bully said that to me )

151: What I’d do if I won in a lottery

buy so many cane corsos

152: What do I like about myself

my personality 

153: My closest Tumblr friend

don’t have one

154: Something I fantasise about

a better life

155: Any question you’d like?

anything!