#but it just feels like trying to logic republicans out of being republicans - actually sex Ed leads to less abortions ect

[avatar-state-kate]

A little bored with the “don’t they get the themes” type retort about republicans liking any art, because you’re not wrong but also they literally don’t care and you pointing out your interpretation (no matter how based in the source material it is, or if the creators outright said what it was about, or the art being completely direct) won’t change there minds.

Republicans like born in the USA because it sounds like a patriotic song, and through the context of playing it at patriotic events/gatherings it becomes one.

[maroonghoul]

Terror Time 2023: Days 7 thru 12

Possession (1981) I don't know what happened in this movie at all, and that's not a complaint. I came for two balls-to-the-wall scenery chewing performances, along with sex with Lovecraftian creatures, and I got it all.

As for everything else, I don't know where the creature came from, or what it's supposed to represent, in-universe or out. Though considering the bookends with Same Neil's employers here, and how one of them had pink socks like his unseen target described at the beginning... Maybe this all a situation similar to Possessor, where because he didn't want to come back, the creature was sent to replace him. After all, how do we know it's the only one? I guess what I'm saying it, this is about a quite literal destruction of the nuclear family. Getting rid of that might as well feel as earth shattering as actual nuclear destruction to the current generation. Though speaking of monster duplicates with possible plans of world domination...

Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978) I first watched this around 20 years ago, coming away scared of the idea pod people could ever come for me. Now I watch it, knowing on some level, I became one of them long ago.

Self-depreciating aside, the big thing I noticed this time around was "anvilicious" the theme was. the original movie was about communism, the 1990s version was supposedly about AIDS and the military, and the 2007 version was about the war on terror, all to varying degrees of quality, I hear. This one, I heard it's about the rise of the baby boomers and all the self-absorption that came with it, and we're still dealing with today. But I also saw a theme of city alienation, along with gentrification caused by conservatives. (That "maybe he's a republican" line also aged too well, especially with who became president just a few years later).

The famous ending scene of the movie, (moreso then all other scenes, so the surprise is ruined basically forever), can be a metaphor that if force doesn't make you assimilate, total hopelessness will do the trick.

I'm surprised there still hasn't been a fifth version at this point. I guess one of two main themes they can make it about (destruction of global culture via the melting pot of America) they touched on here, and, as demonstrated in a video by La'Ron Readus (https://youtu.be/9rJt6SeZfC0?si=kUC3A6gm9ysN8Q60), Get Out pretty much ending up tackling that already. Check his video and his channel out!

The other theme I can think of is climate change, but they even implied that here too. How much you want to bet their "dying world" died because of them? That they spent 100% of their energy surviving, they didn't stop and think about the actual big picture of the world they live on? The common perspective on logic vs emotion is that emotion is dumber, and more chaotic and hurtful then logic, but I liked to think of it as a gut instinct about the world around you that, even though you have no proof, can warrant analysis and investigation. That can at least help your psyche, and at most get a new angle on an issue you and everyone else takes for granted but can gain more. Logic is a tool, not the end.

Ending this by getting back to my opening joke metaphor, I'm hoping that it's more I'm nodding off and my duplicate is still a work in progress that can still be stopped. Part of the reason why I write, as well as just watch horror movies in general, is my effort to not become like them. It's helping a bit for now, but I think in the near future, I'll have to do more.

You Might Be The Killer (2018) This was kind of a funny idea. A slasher having a confidant to try and work out how he got to this point. Along with what I think was a subversion of a Final Girl. They kept expecting it from a supposed pure person, but is instead one that is a little too comfortable killing people, even takes to being the new killer more then the previous host. But yeah, they didn't do enough with this to justify feature-length. Honestly, a normal person brainwashed into a slasher, old family curses, the "hero" actually might being the real villain; the Fear Street Trilogy handled alot of the same stuff here, and frankly, better.

Spree aka the most Zoomer slasher ever. That's not an insult, either of zoomers or the movie. It's effectively in the same family as movies like Taxi Driver and American Psycho but with Tiktok lingo. That sound like a bad cut and paste job, but a good cut and paste job, like this one is, proves that really, all these new developments in technology and social connections have done nothing to solve societal problems that have been with us for generations. Scary and sad, but if it's true, it's true. This was uncomfortable in a good way for the most part, pretty impressive for a premise that could've been so in a bad way (besides all the secondhand embarrassment I felt with our villain protagonist). This movie's essentially about a spree shooter, so I don't think it's an accident he (mostly) doesn't use a gun. When he does, it's saved for near the end and a moment that's the final nail in the coffin for him being actually sympathetic.

Given that I'm talking about a movie about social media ON social media, I have to reflect a bit on it. I'm not looking for loads of followers. Sure, there was a time where I thought it was something amazing, when I joined Facebook for the first time. Until I realized that, even though I went to high school with all those my first few accepted friend requests, I had nothing of substance to talk about with them. So now, I'm either trying to find people with common interests, (especially in my area) or trying to express my honest thoughts on a subject I can engage in good faith about. Besides monetary reasons, I never understood being obsessed with having the most subscribers or views. I guess they're looking for fans rather then friends. Like I said with Pearl, it's a pursuit that is over before it's started if you can't find people who want to see it. When it comes down to it, I'd rather make connections with only a few people rather than a chat filled with gremlins. Showbiz is only worth it if you have something to show, not just something you think you want.

Hell House LLC II: The Abaddon Hotel The original was one of the most unsettling found footage films I have ever seen, with a fairly original set up and one of the creepiest clowns ever, mostly because it took the less is more approach. This one got rid of one of those; padding it out with so many people we supposed to believe are stupid enough to enter a haunted house with a confirmed body count! Even the scares felt less diverse; a lot of ghost woman with the same eye contacts.

Eh, to be fair, it's still unsettling, thanks to them using the same set. Sure, the last scene wasn't scary, but hey, it was near the end so they could get away with it, and Tully still pretty much won so...

The Sadness It's either Mayhem, but more larger scale and darker or the Crazies remake but bloodier and with a darker ending. I knew things wouldn't end well for the main couple just from how lovey-dovey the first few scenes were, but it was actually bleaker than I expected. I expected them either one of them to die or both to die and they'd all be real sad about it. I didn't expect one, if not both of them to get infected, and when they died, neither of them were giving a shit about the other. Yikes.

Also, I knew I was warned about the content going in, but I didn't have a reaction to it. I'm weird that way, I guess. I'm warned that this and Crimes of the Future were too intense, and I just shrug it off. But Malignant for some reason, gets me light-headed? Maybe it's more I can't stand hospitals, at least in movies.

The Babysitter (2017) This was super goofy, though a bit too pop culture heavy. I could've done with a bit more satanism, either more rituals or an actual demon. Also, move aside Home Alone; this the real Die Hard with a kid. Yeah, Samara Weaving's charisma is apparent even this early ( and really funny she's in a movie about two years later that has a similar premise but with her on the other side), but my favorite cultist is actually Max. I always liked seeing this himbo henchmen we've been getting the past 20 years or so. The guy who, if he's not trying to kill you at the moment, is actually trying to be your friend. I even been seeing this archetype in anime, so obviously the appeal is close to universal. Though I did find the age appropriate love interest a bit too sickly sweet that it takes me out of it. This was goofy fun, all the same. Maybe I'll get to the sequel one day.

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

Ok it has become apparent to me that people do not understand what I mean by conservative on accident.

Nobody my age is voting republican. Let's be clear on that. With the exception of a small minority of gamer gaters and people who were raised in actual cults most people my age are either commies or good liberals who votes straight blue down the ticket. This is because of the greta thunberg effect. We're all afraid of dying of thirst because there's no water anymore at the age of 35. Wealthy white children are no longer safe with the republican party which has become less of a political party and more of a death cult, and white children are less wealthy than they used to be (I specify white because POC by in large never voted for the party of the southern strategy for obvious reasons). We as a generation are so insanely blue that they're trying to raise the voting age to 25 about it.

This liberalism and party affiliation doesn't preclude them from being conservative on accident. What I mean by that is... Well

No kink at pride is a great example. The assumption that pride should exist at all makes them think that they're immune to conservative logic but they're still trying to enforce a dominant ideology onto a minority group. That person who made the tweet about how you shouldn't have sex in houses where there are children in the other room and if you can't avoid it you're a sex addict. That's a great example of like straight up puritanism coming out of the mouth of someone who proports themselves to be a leftist

If you ever see a discourse that feels like an obvious psyop as an adult and you can't understand why these supposed leftist youths are falling for it it's because that kid has never had sex in the woods and had to try to buy plan b under their parent's nose. My generation is dumb about sex. We're dumb about drugs. We're dumb about theft. We moralize literally everything. We're so dumb about stranger danger that we never learned how to community organize so while the vast vast majority of us are crushed by existential dread about debt and climate change but we never do anything about it because we just don't know how to organize because we're raised to see everyone else as a threat and we never went to or organized parties as teens because our parents would always know and stop us.

They managed to invent a generation that hates capitalism but fully buys into individualism and who is supportive of queer people and way less monogamous than previous generations but who still buys into the base assumptions of the nuclear family and thinks sex is evil. The levels of politics going on here are way weirder and stupider and more complicated than "young people vote republican and watch Fox news"

here's my hot take about my generation and people younger than me (I'm 22 years old)

The reason current teenagers and people in their really early 20s are conservative on accident and have such shitty takes on the internet is because our generation was much more sheltered than previous generations and because we were raised to be ok with orwellian servailence and that is 100% the fault of our parents, Reagan Era kidnapping panics, and the rise of technology all coming together to prevent us from doing the sketchy shit that sends parents into panic mode but which is also completely fundemental to childhood development. If your parents had even a crumb of money to their name and even a shred of free time they started tracking your phone as soon as it was possible to. I did not experience this because my parents are actively trying to live like it's the 1990s and still have not gotten cell phones of their own, and did not let me have one until I was 18 years old and it was no longer their choice, but literally over half of my friends in middle and high school had their phones tracked by their parents at some point or other, and we would occasionally find this out, not because their parents told them, but when we were trying to do the aforementioned sketchy shit and their parent's car would pull up. And I would, like a reasonable person after finding this out, encourage my friends to just leave their phones at home, and their response would be "What if I get kidnapped" or "My parents are just trying to keep me safe"

This in my estimation has lead to a combination of kids being terminally online because they do have internet access and are better at deleting search history than their parents think they are, but don't have the freedom to go out and do shit without their parents' knowledge or consent, so they have the most privacy from the people who control their lives while they're on the internet, and kids not having the real world experiences they should have, not knowing how to connect with other people irl, not feeling comfortable leaving the house because of the horror story lies their parents told them to make them ok with the surveillance they were inflicting on their kids. Kids these days are growing up in the fucking panopticon when they should be out in the woods playing with knives or stealing cigarettes from their older sibling and going out to an empty parking lot to smoke them or whatever and that shit is sticking with them into adulthood. Things that were "tee hee we could get in trouble isn't this so fun and daring" in the 1990s and 2000s have become in the 2010s and 2020s things that are "If I do that without texting my parents some sort of lie to excuse where my location is my parent's car will pull up and I will get grounded for the next two weeks."

Like even when I was 19 I had a 16 year old friend who would volunteer their time at a food shelf and that's how we knew each other. We would talk about dungeons and dragons together, and the game store was 4 blocks from the food shelf. One day we left the food shelf earlier than they had told their parents they would and they got punished for that. We were literally just going to look at dungeons and dragons miniatures and dice, which was self evident if you could see where we started and how far we walked and where too. I have to assume that this isn't uncommon. It's wrong, but it's not uncommon.

[impossiblelibrary]

Today's rant brought to you by: Queer Eye Japan, can we all just try to be as kind as they try to be?

After watching the Queer Eye Japan super short season, I wanted to google to see the overall reaction to the show, make sure that my western eyes were correct in seeing the care that was given to the culture. Were cultural taboos, other than being outwardly gay, crossed? So I find this article in the top results and other than the perspective, why tho? Tokyoesque.com had an article with a higher reading level, with surface level appreciation but at least better written.

I can't get over this hate article though. Unfounded, dumb, wrong and incorrect. Do not go forward unless you like that blistering kind of anger from me.

But the reasons just get weaker as the article extends: "Hurts the country it set out to save?" Looking for white savior much? They did not go to save Japan, they gave some free shit to like 4-5 people, think smaller.

Their culture guide wasn't gay enough.

You want to suggest any lgbt insta models or celebrities, use your platform to raises some up?

"There is a growing sexless culture in Japan for married and unmarried people, and it is perilous watching Queer Eye present this without any context behind what is driving this behavior."

Sexiness is what the fab 5 embrace, unfortunately and it was probably discussed behind the scenes of how much talking about sex was allowed or polite and the conversation of not having sex is closer to the tip of the tongue rather than the feeling of sexiness. The West is not the ones blasting that information. It is across multiple Japanese printed newspapers and online stories by now and the "context" is still being discussed and debated amongst Japanese. So I don't think any outsiders should be weighing in or "explaining" this phenomenon. We can repeat what we have been told but guessing at the reasons is not our place. The reasons illustrated by the author of the article seem lacking, a take but not the only one, but who am I to speak on that being in a sexual relationship with someone who pulls from that culture?

Kiko begins to lecture Yoko-san on how she “threw away her womanhood” (referring to a Japanese idiom, onna wo suteru) by going makeup-free and wearing drab, shapeless clothes.

The mistranslation by the subtitles fixed by this author was necessary information. But Kiko didn't lecture her on it, it was brought up by Yoko before any of them arrived, that was her theme, that was what she had decided to focus on. Meanwhile, if you watched Jonathan, he understood there was no time to spend on makeup and skincare so provided her a one instrument, 3 points of color on the skin to feel prettier. That and the entire episode being the 5 treating her like a woman on a date, not trying to hook her up, which is what they did in American eps.

"In teaching a Japanese woman, who already struggles to find time for herself, how to make an English recipe, Antoni is making great TV and nothing more."

So Antoni shouldn't have taught her apple pie because it's too exotic for a Japanese woman. (Can you smell the sexism?)

He didn't make an apple pie, altho Yoko did mention her mother made that for her when she was a kid. He made an apple tartine after going to a Japanese bakery who makes that all the time. Then highlighted the apples came from Fuji in true Japanese media fashion. Honey, American television doesn't usually highlight where the ingredients come from. A Japanese producer told him to do that. So all worries handled within the same ep. She got Japanese ingredients, had the recipe shown to her and then made it for her friends in her own house. Did the author actually watch this show or nah?

"beaten over the head with his western self-help logic. “You have to live for yourself,” he says."

The style of build up the 5 went for was confrontational but in a "I'm fighting for you" way. It's hard to describe, but the best I can say is, a person has multiple voices in their head, from parents, siblings, society, and maybe themselves. By being loud and obnoxious, American staples right there, they are adding one more voice. You deserve this, you are amazing, you are worth it. I know this is against most Japanese cultural modesty, but maybe it shouldn't be.

Sarcasm lies ahead:

Apparently: mispronunciation is microaggressions, not just someone who had a sucky school system. Yea okay, They're laughing at the language not at how stumbling these monolinguals are with visiting another country. Mmhm. Japanese don't say I love you and don't touch and that should stay that way instead of maybe, once in awhile, feeling like they can hug. Yeah, let's just ignore Yoko's break down that she had never hugged her lifelong friend after hugging strangers multiple times. Maid cafes are never sexualized in Japan ever, just don't go down that one street in Akihabara where the men are led off by the hand sheepishly blushing. Gag me. And Japanese men love to cry in front of their wives and would never break down once the wife leaves. I have never seen a Japanese movie showcase that move. Grr.

"I identify as many cultures."

So you're a Japanese man when it's convenient for you to get an article published? Are you nationally Japanese or just ethnically or culturally?

Homeland is an inherently racist word?

"After the Bush administration created the Department of Homeland Security after the 9/11 terrorist attacks, a Republican consultant and speechwriter Peggy Noonan urged, “the name Homeland Security grates on a lot of people, understandably. Homeland isn’t really an American word, it’s not something we used to say or say now.”

Yes, let's use a Washington Post article rather than a etymology professor. Yes, the google search results increased after 2001 Homeland Security was used but the word has been around since the 1660s and I've read multiple turn of the century lit on white people returning to their homeland, i.e. the town off the coast they were born in.

"But" is not disagreeing. I think the repeated offender for the author is the not acknowledging the makeover-ees feelings. But, that is how LGBT have decided to deal with the inner voices that invade from society. They are just that, not our own, they are the influence of society, and we can choose, we have to choose, to be influenced by someone, anyone else.

Karamo can't speak about being black when an Asian is speaking about being Asian, even though the Asian gay man was feeling alone. It's called relating bitches, and I'm done with people saying that is redirecting the conversation, it's extending the conversation. That's how we talk, the spotlight is shared, especially when someone's about to cry and doesn't want to be seen as crying, time to turn the spotlight.

The gay monk wasn't good enough, you should have invited the gay politician.

Yeah, causes I'm sure a politician has all the time in the world for a quick stint and cry. They picked a Japanese monk who travels to NY because they had a guest who travels to the West too. Did you want him to stop traveling back and forth? Did you want a pure, ethnic and cultural Japanese gay man who has no ties to the west to talk to this Western educated young man? Seriously?

This is just not how it works in Japan.

Being in a multi-cultural marriage between two rebels, discussions on facets of culture are plenty in my household. Culture should be respected enough to be considered but not held on a pedestal like we should never adjust or throw some things out. LGBT being quiet and private for instance. "Being seen" was Jonathan's advice, and a good one especially for a Japanese gay man that was called feminine since he was a kid. Some gay men can hide, but as Jonathan said, he couldn't hide what he was, he couldn't hide this. So fuck it. Don't hide. It's actually more dangerous for a feminine man to come off as anxious rather than gay and proud. It makes you more of a target if they think you won't fight back. Proud means, Imma throw hands too, bitch.

This is also from the civil rights playbook going back to Black America: never hold a protest or a fight without the cameras, without being seen. LGBT have found the more seen they are, in media, in the streets, the better off we are. When LGBT Americans were being "private" about our lifestyles, we died, a la 1980s. They won't care if you start dying off if they never saw you to begin with.

And hence why I think the author's real anger is from these 5 being seen dancing flamboyantly in Shibuya, in Harajuku, afforded the privilege of doing this safely because of their tourist status, cameras and very low violence rate in Tokyo, loud and obnoxiously. Honestly, they wouldn't have been invited or nominated if they didn't want that brash American-ness coming into their home, just for a taste, at least.

Here's my real anger, my own jealousy: Japan's queer community currently does not have marriage or adoption rights. US does, so we have progressed further. But we are also not that many years from being tied to cow fences with barbed wire, beaten with baseball bats and left for dead overnight. If things are so bad over there, maybe take a few pages from the civil right playbook we took so much time to perfect and produced by the Black Americans who fought first. But so far, I only hear loss of jobs and marriages, which we still have here too. Stop trying to divide us, we are one community, LGBT around the world and we are here to try to help. Take it or leave it, it's not like we're going to go organize your own Pride parade for you.

Rant over? I guess. Is this important enough to be put in the google results along with his. Hell no, anyone with half a mind can see he's reaching more than half the time. And any argument about: this wasn't covered! There are a shit ton of conversations that are not covered in the 45 min they have. They are not a civil rights show, it's a makeover show, doing their best in that direction anyway. Know what it is.

Next blog post, what research I would guess was happening behind the scenes for each of the 5? I'm pretty sure I saw Jonathan doing Japanese style makeup there...

[theteej]

on white performative anxiety on election night

Ok, here we go. I had decided that I would not watch the election results unfold last night because quite frankly--it was clear that it would be a close race, and just like with sports games it takes a particular type of narcissistic imagining to think that constant watching will change the impact of an event simply because you watch it.  Also, this isn't a sports game--it's people's lives.  So I ordered a pizza and worked through three unread X-Men collections (decent, by the way--especially the new take on Marauders).

By 8pm I was getting frequent texts, and despite putting my phone in another room, i heard the buzzing enough to get me off the couch. I logged onto social media to see a flood of white Democrats having a complete meltdown as if the election had been called.  And that same existential dread/despair cataclysmically reverberating across social media in New Zealand, South Africa, and Australia.  I was so confused.  What the actual fuck were people upset about?  He hadn't conceded. Most states hadn't been called.  The responses felt so much like being in high school or college where I'd studied for exams and felt reasonably prepared but then got overwhelmed in the psychic energy of performed anxiety/fear/studying that everyone did around finals.  Hell, in pre-covid times I had to limit my time on campus as a professor in the last week because the palpable miasma of fear/anxiety/performative freaking out was too much for me, even though I WAS JUST GRADING THE FINALS. Honestly, I was baffled.  Why were people like this?  They knew that Wisconsin and Michigan and Pennsylvania were not going to count their early voting polls first, and the in person would screw Republican.  WHY WERE THEY FREAKING OUT?

And then it slowly dawned on me.  They really had believed their own lies.  They thought there was going to be a magical, massive blue wave of repudiation of President Trump, after the xenophobia, the racism, the wanton cruelty, the vicious fascism.  They needed to believe that this moment would redeem them, this electoral moment would fix them.  And they were mourning, almost disproportionately, this sense of utter collapse.  They were treating the reality of the closeness of the election as somehow equivalent to the idea of a Trump re-election victory.  What the actual hell.

I started to see a lot of "I can't believe it's even this close" statuses.  I put down my pizza in annoyance and kept reading.  There were so many variations on the time-honoured "this is not who we are" canard so many people tell themselves about America. People were mourning, in real time, the lie they'd told themselves.  There was a fundamental believe that Trumpism, the vile populism and toxic mix of racism and other oppressive elements, was an "aberration" that could be corrected.  There was a willing disbelief that this was not part of the very core of this country, that 'America' as a concept is a bad place--one made entirely possible through enslavement and genocide and one that was absolutely fixable through a simple electoral action.  And it's wild, because that's never been the case.  Not now, not ever.  I remember in 2008, being overwhelmed by white people wanting to celebrate Obama with me, but I was also keenly aware of racism and the fact that my own state had just voted to take away same-sex marriage.  Dr. Jim Barrett, a professor in my graduate program at Illinois, stopped me, a new, black graduate student who he didn't know, and said, "isn't the election great?" and i said, "I'm from California, and I'm more worried also about how easily people can dismiss queer rights."  He paused for a second, and then said, "but we did it this time with Obama!"  Here was a full-grown man with a PhD in American history casually telling a black graduate student (WHOSE NAME HE DID NOT EVEN KNOW) how great it was to be able to absolve oneself of responsibility via an electoral process, and to imagine an America without self-criticism, just redemption.

And that's what was at the heart of this baffling pre-capitulation, one that exceeded even the easy stereotype of the always-losing Democrats.  BIDEN HADN'T EVEN LOST. He had (and as of now still) leads in electoral votes! But everyone was moaning, gnashing teeth, and grieving.  But what they were really grieving was their own innocence.  Their naïve assumption that they could be the heroes in a story, in a history of violence that was expressly built for them, even if they wanted to deny it.  Trumpism sells a fantasy of white revanchism, of recovery, and even those whites who imagine otherwise can't exorcise it via a ballot because the entire system of it is at its core, still violent and racist.  Y'all seriously wanted a parade, a movement repudiating this.  What America do you live in?  Did we not go through the same black summer?  Of course we didn't.  You saw this summer as a moment of profound alliance building and a recapturing of a mythical value of inclusion.  We saw it with surprise--oh white people either just realized that black lives are cheap, or they were sufficiently bothered/bored enough to perform about it.

So much of this is a navel-gazing performance of anxiety.  2016 was traumatizing for people who didn't want to think Trumpism was America, but it IS.  And it's done in your name.  

This morning, I saw even more of this.  A friend and colleague wrote a lengthy status about her anxiety about it all and hope that 'good' would prevail, and bemoaned the lack of a real wave of change.  A friend, family member, or colleague of theirs immediately commented with pro-Trump sloganeering.  And she did nothing.  She kept commenting.  This broke me for a second.  How could she not see what a joke all of this was? What she was?  Here she was bemoaning a lack of some sort of prelapsarian goodness, trying to make some sort of "we'll get through this message," and she couldn't even see what she was doing.  There was no acknowledgment, no censuring, no pushback, no RESPONSE to the Trump sloganeering, because she could not fathom the idea that this was connected to HER.  The disappointment she felt, that so many people expressed on social media? It was performative, it was a mourning one's inability to distance oneself from genocidal, suicidal logics of all of this populist turpitude.  She couldn't even denounce the very Trumpism on her own fucking wall, in response to her comment.  Of course there was no blue wave, of course there was no rebuking.  Why should there be?  There are no consequences.  Just white folk hoping civility will save them, with the same baffling surety as King Canute commanding the waves to cease lapping at the feet of his throne.  The whole event felt like a farce--people attempting to distance themselves from a violence done in their name by refusing to even pushback against he very violence that endangers millions of people, incarcerates children, kills with impunity.

I feel, once again, like I'm the one person who felt confident for an exam during finals week.  Everyone's freaking the fuck out, performing, demonstrating a goodness, trying to foolishly imagine the country as good.  I think back to March, when black voters in South Carolina made very clear what was going to happen.  White people were not coming to save them.  Electoral legerdemain was not going to happen, there was no last minute deus ex machina.  There was the brutal calculus that many people don't see the fascism as bad, and remain so insulated that they don't care if the brute returns, so much as the lesser peoples are put in their place.  Those black voters saw that their best chance was the utter uninspiring, safe, and milquetoast flavour of whiteness, Joe Biden.  And they were right.  We can push that one, perhaps.  Make changes.  But this was always going to be a bitter slog, and at most, a close thing.  America is a bad place. We cannot redeem it through performance, through simply voting.  We don't exorcise our structural violence with selfies and dashes of ink on sealed papers.

Now that we know this, we can actually push back against the attempted voter fraud that IS happening right now, and then hope that this mediocre blue man wins.  And then maybe y'all can join us in doing the hard, daily work that also involves critically acknowledging our own complicity, investment, and inclusion in a violent, illegitimate space.  We have to live in these contradictions, to push and transform it, and remember that there are no cheat codes here.  Just grinding work, and no cookies or congratulation.

Be fucking better, y'all.

[blakelywintersfield]

As a victim of gun violence myself, I will be keeping my guns, thanks. Fear mongering? Maybe a little bit the fact is politicians absolutely “hell yes I want to take your AR15, your AK47”. They’ve said it often and loudly that they would like you to be disarmed. If you feel no one in your home is mentally stable enough for a gun, great, but you have zero right to tell others they should do the same.

1. If you're a victim of gun violence then the NRA gives absolutely NO fucks about you. You're not a victim of gun violence in their eyes, you're a victim of a criminal who happened to have a gun. Calling it "gun violence" is liberal propaganda to blame the gun, instead of the person. The gun didn't create the violence, the person did. That's their shitbrained logic and that's how they would respond to you if you told them (without disclosing if you're a gun owner or not) "I was a victim of gun violence." Because just like your dumb ass, they're not responsible gun owners, they're reactionary gun owners, and if you're reactionary as opposed to rational, you shouldn't have dangerous weapons, and your "you can't tell me what to do" 5-year-old attitude towards that would not hold up in a myriad of other scenarios. By your logic, suspending the driver's license of an elderly individual with dementia is unconstitutional. Not allowing someone with chronic seizures to drive is unconstitutional. Not allowing people to sell food without meeting safety and sanitation standards is unconstitutional. "You can't tell me what to do 'cause muh freedumb" isn't a fucking part of the constitution, you're just a chronic nationalist boot deep-throater whose mommy told him that the world owed him everything.

2. Where did I say guns should be taken away from you, or anyone else in my tags. Where? Here, I'll post the fucking screenshot of it and you can highlight it:

Please show me where I said "people should have their guns taken away" you reactionary cowardly fuck. I'll wait.

3. Politicians stating "no one needs a stockpile of AK47s" is not synonymous with "we want to take your guns". Gun buy-back programs that are VOLUNTARY are not the same as threatening to "take your guns". What benefit would you, as one person, gain from owning 5 semi-automatic weapons in the argument of "self-defense"? Are you going to wield one in each hand, one with each foot, and one with the mouth you can't seem to fucking shut? Do you think any of these weapons would protect you against government militia (which is what the second amendment is FOR, for one, and which the NRA does NOT condone if it's conservative sanctioned militia takeover) breaking into your property with a force of 10 people in bulletproof gear and military-grade weapons that could probably blow your fucking empty head off your body in one shot? Or do you like owning all of these shiny scary-looking toys for intimidation, thinking it'll protect you from future violence, like a fucking Halloween house made to scare away children? If that's your reasoning, then you definitely need therapy because that's textbook maladaptive coping with trauma -- I'd know because I have my own array of self-defense weapons that I got in response to my traumatic event, including a knife that could fatally gut an adult man with one stab. That's not a reasonable response to trauma!! But at least I can admit it! Your pisswad ass on the other hand can't, and views anyone saying "the NRA is a shit organization that doesn't support responsible gun ownership or the responsibility of gun owners and their actions, and is essentially a domestic terrorist grooming organization" as an attack on you as an individual, because you can't stomach the idea that maybe, just fucking maybe, you may be on that list of people who shouldn't have a gun because you're too mentally fucked up to be trusted with something like that, like people who are chronically suicidal (in other words, the MAJORITY OF GUN RELATED DEATHS), people with psychotic tendencies that can lead to hurting themselves or others (not because people with psychosis are "scary evil people", but because those moments of psychosis literally keep a person from making rational observations and decisions, and these individuals are already advised to have possible harmful tools locked up or just not in the house for their own safety), people like incels that believe if their entitlement is denied that they have the right to murder, etc. Honestly, you do sound like someone who shouldn't have guns, because your unstable ass probably read up to the second tag and skimmed the rest in a blind rage before sending an ask two days after I made that post, and seemed to conveniently miss the end:

What's your reasoning for the NRA keeping silent about responsible black gun owners being gunned down by police because the cops know they're legally registered gun owners (Jason Washington, Alton Sterling, Philando Castile, whom the NRA defended being murdered by police while pulled over for a traffic violation, in his car with his wife and CHILD, and verbally informed the cop like a responsible gun owner that he had a conceal and carry permit, and was reaching for his wallet in plain view of his family and the fucking pig)? What's your reasoning behind them callously dismissing police violence against black people who are unarmed or have a history of supporting gun control (Botham Jean, Clementa Pinckney, fucking JAMES SHAW JR., WHO STOPPED A MASS SHOOTING WHILE UNARMED HIMSELF), as though that makes it their fault they were murdered, injured, or otherwise victimized? What's your reasoning behind them only piping up about "muh guns" whenever politicians say "there's a gun problem" after the 29th public shooting that month, but not tackling the issue of gun control disproportionately impacting people of color while letting crazy little white kids run loose with a multitude of firearms? What's your reasoning behind them siding with idiot fascist Trump's temper tantrum over the NFL's protests on police violence -- something they, once again, consistently respond to with "they should've been armed" if the black person wasn't, and give complete fucking radio static to if the black person was armed (even if legally armed)? They're so against gun control, but never seem to care when it affects black and brown people -- only when Jack Incelson, age 16, who posts on 4chan about how he wants to cut women's heads off and fuck their dead bodies, is at risk of not being allowed to keep his AR15. If people of color are killed while armed, it's justified because "they had a gun"; if people of color are killed while unarmed, it's their fault because "they should've had a gun" -- this is something the NRA is notorious for, because they don't give a flying fuck about people who should have the right to arm themselves.

4. On that point: I fully support the Socialist Rifle Association, even as someone who does not want to own guns -- because, as stated in the post you're shitting your diaper over -- I support organizations that vouch for responsible gun owners. The SRA holds irresponsible gun owners accountable. They actually support people's right to bear arms to defend themselves against tyrannical government forces. They are active in disaster aid, in environmental defense, in protecting people of color. I do not like guns but I 100% support the SRA, because they fight for people who do need to arm themselves to have that right, and I support that sentiment. I believe people of color should be able to arm themselves. I believe queer people should be able to arm themselves. I believe poor people should be able to arm themselves. But the NRA doesn't actively fight for any of those groups' rights -- the SRA does.

But you know what the SRA doesn't do? Send out unsolicited letters begging lower-middle-class white people for money so they can "fight the gun-hating liberals" from "taking away our guns n freedumb" and offering "i <3 guns" bumper stickers and shit in return. They don't view any political party as their friend because they know that Republicans and Democrats alike do not actually want you to be able to defend yourself against the government. They don't send fear-mongering letters full of hyperbolic bullshit to scare people into thinking that Biden or Obama or whatever Democrat is in the office is going to break into your house with police, beat your wife and children, and steal your guns while cackling maniacally over you as you sob "why mister president? why would you do this to your loyal and patriotic citizens?" The SRA opposes gun control laws that unfairly target demographics that are at the highest risk of police violence. The NRA does not, and, in fact, has a very heavily documented history of siding with conservatism, including making statements about things that don't even involve guns -- stating that American men are being turned into "second-rate women", outcried banning anti-queer discrimination and compared the ban to slavery, made a call to imprison people protesting against Trump's Cabinet picks, called the Women's March anti-American. These are all recent you shithead, so you must be purposely ignoring all of this to feel justified in defending this domestic terrorist organization, or you're probably a self-victimizing white man who can't handle being told no. Or maybe both. I don't know and I don't fucking care.

Don't fucking message me again. Unfollow me if you were previously following me and haven't already. Get some fucking therapy instead of crawling through strangers' blogs trying to find a reason to justify your irrational anger at them. And while you're at it, do me a huge favor, you cowardly fucking cunt: go to your nearest sex shop, buy 5 gallons of lube, pour them over your guns, and shove each and every one of them, fully loaded, up your ass. That way you can keep a close eye on them since your head is obviously already lodged up there.

Alternatively, you can eat shit and die.

[ceealaina]

Title: Computer Love Collaborator Name: ceealaina Card Number: 3088 Link: AO3 Square Filled: A3 - Artificial Intelligence Ship: Stony Rating: Explicit Major Tags: Steve Versus Technology, Get Together, Smut Summary: A spam email and a misunderstanding from Steve lead to him accidentally revealing something very surprising. Word Count: 6228

Contrary to popular belief, Steve had adapted to technology wonderfully. As far as he was concerned, microwaves were the greatest things ever invented, right after the internet and computers. He still used physical newspapers, but it was mostly just to drive Tony crazy. He could use a tablet and his phone without even thinking, and loved the array of information and music and games that were instantly available at his fingertips. And he could spend hours binge-watching tv shows and movies. 

What took a lot more getting used to was people. The way they interacted now was different. It had taken him probably too long to realize that men especially didn’t stand as close, didn’t touch the same way — except for Tony, who was as touchy feely as they came. He’d apologized, once, but Steve had told him he didn’t mind, that he appreciated that easy, friendly, physical intimacy that he’d thought he’d lost in the 40s, and since then Tony had made a point of touching him, probably more often that he did anyone else. 

Other interactions hadn’t been so easy. 

So when Steve woke up one morning, and found the email in his work inbox -- from his own email address -- he had a brief heart attack. 

Hello!

I have very bad news for you. on this day I hacked your OS and got full access to your account xxxxxxxxxx

So, you can change the password, yes… But my malware intercepts it every time. 

How I made it:

In the software of the router, through which you went online, was a vulnerability. I just hacked this router and placed my malicious code on it. When you went online, my trojan was installed on the OS of your device. 

After that, I made a full dump of your disk (I have all your address book, history of viewing sites, all files, phone numbers and addresses of all your contacts). 

A month ago, I wanted to lock your device and ask for a not big amount of btc to unlock. But I looked at the sites that you regularly visit, and I was shocked by what I saw!!!

I’m talk you about sites for adults. 

I want to say - you are a BIG pervert. Your fantasy is shifted far away from the normal course!

And I did an idea… I made a screeshot of the adult sites where you have fun (do you understand what it is about, huh?). After that, I made a screenshot of your joys (using the camera of your device) and glued them together. Turned out amazing! You are so spectacular

I’m know that you would not like to show these screenshots to your friends, relatives or colleagues. I think 51551 is a very, very small amount for my silence. 

Besides, I have been spying on you for so long, having spent a lot of time!

Pay ONLY in Bitcoins!

My BTC wallet: 182pjesSewBUj8PEgfM58p64jbok3i1gNU

You do not know how to use bitcoins? Enter a query in any search engine: “how to replenish btc wallet”. It’s extremely easy

For this payment I give you two days (48 hours). As soon as this letter is opened, the timer will work. 

After payment, my virus and dirty screenshots with your enjoys will be self-destruct automatically. If I do not receive from you the specified amount, then your device will be locked, and all your contacts will receive a screenshots with your “enjoys”.

I hope you understand your situation.

Do not try to find and destroy my virus! (All your data, files and screenshots is already uploaded to a remote server)

Do not try to contact me (this is not feasible, I sent you an email from your account)

Various security services will not help you; formatting a disk or destroying a device will not help, since your data is already on a remote server. 

P.S. You are not my single victim. so, I guarantee you that I will not disturb you again after payment! This is the word of honor hacker

I also ask you to regularly update your antiviruses in the future. This way you will no longer fall into a similar situation. 

Do not hold evil! I just do my job. Good luck. 

“Oh shiiit,” Steve breathed. 

It wasn’t that he had any problem with porn, or his own sexual proclivities. He had known he was attracted to both men and women since before Captain America was even a thought in anyone’s mind, and he felt exactly zero shame about that. He had, in fact, been just waiting for a Republican broadcaster to bring it up so he could announce his bisexuality in the most satisfying way possible. The increase in acceptance of different sexualities was one of his other favourite things about the future. 

But that didn’t mean he wanted everyone getting full frontal shots of him jerking off. 

He knew, logically, that it happened these days. He had watched exactly thirteen seconds of Tony’s sex tape before realizing that oh shit, it was real and snapping his laptop shut. But he didn’t think he could handle it quite so well -- he lacked both Tony’s sense of self-confidence, and his utter lack of shame. And he was Captain America, he was meant to be a role model, there were certain things people expected of him. 

And then there was the whole other aspect of the Captain America issue. If they’d managed to hack his personal email, who knew what other sensitive information they might have come across in the process. 

A feeling of panic starting to pool in his stomach, he hopped out of bed. Pausing just long enough to pull on sweatpants and a t-shirt, he grabbed his tablet and made a dash for the lab. 

Tony was elbows-deep in some circuitry, although he seemed to have been expecting Steve, giving him a quick glance and a warm smile as Steve burst into the room. 

“Nice outfit, Cap,” he told him, and Steve glanced down to realize his shirt was inside out and his sweatpants were on backwards. “What can I do for you?” 

“Uhh.” Now that he was here, Steve wasn’t entirely sure how to explain. “I could use your… Technical expertise?” he tried, tightening his grip slightly on the tablet. “It’s sort of sensitive. And time sensitive too, for that matter.”

That, apparently, intrigued Tony enough to finish up what he was doing and give Steve his full attention. “What’s up?” he asked, taking in Steve’s harried appearance. “You okay?” 

“Yeah. I mean… I think so?” Steve sighed and held out his tablet, holding it like it might explode at any moment. “I got this email this morning,” he said, deciding it would be easier to let Tony read it for himself, rather than trying to stumble his way through an explanation. “It came from my own account.”

Tony arched an eyebrow, but he looked more curious than concerned. His eyes flickered as he read over the screen, and he couldn’t have been more than a few seconds in before he started laughing. A little nonplussed, Steve folded his arms across his chest, frown creasing his forehead as Tony kept laughing over the email. 

“Oh god, this is priceless,” he choked out. “The spelling! ‘A screenshot of your joys!’” There were actual tears in Tony’s eyes, he was laughing so hard, and Steve was starting to get a little offended now. “Oh god, and then trying to convince you at the end that he’s actually a good guy, and not to hate him.” Tony actually snorted, wiping tears from his eyes as he set the tablet down on a table. “Oh man. Thanks, Steve, you big pervert.” He giggled again. “It’s been a day. Or, uh…” He glanced somewhat guiltily at the clock. “Night, I guess. I really needed that.”

“Uhh… Okay.” Steve watched as Tony walked back over to his project. “But what are we going to do about it?” 

“Do about it?” Tony repeated, looking utterly confused for a minute before his eyes widened. “Oh. Oh, Steve, it’s not real.” 

His voice was kind, but something about it made Steve feel squirmy and uncomfortable, embarrassed by his own ignorance. “What do you mean it’s not real?” he asked.

“It’s a scam, Steve. It wasn’t even sent from a real person. It’s just a real basic AI, and an automated message.”

“But it came from my account?” Steve hated that it came out as a question. 

“It’s a spoof; it didn’t really come from your account, the program just makes it look like it did.” 

Steve felt his eyes go wide. “They can do that?” 

“Pretty easily, actually, if you know what you’re doing.” 

Steve picked up the tablet again, frowning down at it. He felt silly now, but still couldn’t help being a little worried. Tony had just written it off so quickly. What if he was wrong? 

Tony sighed, coming around to stand beside him. “Look, Steve, just read it over. The writing is a mess. It’s barely comprehensible in some places.” 

“Not everyone gets to go to some fancy-ass finishing school, Tony,” Steve pointed out, sounding grumpier than he’d really intended. “Their grasp of the English language doesn’t mean it’s not legit.” 

“Okay,” Tony acknowledged, obviously starting to get frustrated in response to Steve’s tone. “But Steve… a ��vulnerability in the router?’ Who has two thumbs and personally designed every bit of technology in this joint to make sure it would be completely secure?” He pointed to himself with both thumbs. “This guy! For fuck’s sake, Steve, your work computer doesn’t even have a webcam. How would they even get these screenshots?”

“Well, I don’t know, Tony,” Steve snapped back, once again opening his mouth without thinking. “You’ve got a robot butler, alright? Someone secretly taping me jerking off to Iron Man porn could definitely happen.” 

For a moment, Steve didn’t even realize what he’d said, glaring mutinously down at the email. But Tony’s lack of a snappy response grew suspicious, and Steve looked up to find Tony staring at him with wide, unblinking eyes, mouth hanging open. 

“I’m sorry. You jerk off to what now?”

“Uhh,” Steve cleared his throat, doing his best to give off an appearance of nonchalance. “You know, I just meant in like a… General sense of the meaning.” He was pretty sure the blush he could feel setting his cheeks on fire was giving him away. 

“Right,” Tony said, tilting his head as he eyed him consideringly. He leaned back against a table, crossing his legs at the ankles and folding his arms across his chest. “So you only jerk off to Iron Man porn in a general sense.” 

“Yes,” Steve said with confidence that he didn’t feel. “Wait, no! I don’t jerk off to Iron Man porn. I just meant that… someone could… jerk off to Iron Man porn.” 

“Oh, I see.” Tony nodded sagely, but he was openly grinning at him now. “You were referring to the general me, and not the specific me.”

Steve glared, but it was lacking in heat. “I know you’re just making fun of me,” he grumbled. Tony gave him a pointed look in return, like he deserved it. “Look, you’re very…” He gesticulated wildly at Tony, trying to encompass everything he was. “You. And then the suits are amazing pieces of technology, and the way they move and…” 

“Huh.” Tony licked his lip almost nervously, before a shit-eating smirk crossed his lips. “So is that why you spend so much time hanging out with me down here? Perving on my suits and storing up images for the spank bank?”

“No!” Steve burst out. “No, of course not. I’m here because I enjoy spending time with you!”

Tony’s eyebrow arched, tongue flicking out again. It was very distracting. “So then is it Iron Man porn you’re watching, or Tony Stark porn?” 

Steve’s eyes went wide. “There’s Tony Stark porn??” he demanded, before realizing that his voice probably came out just a little too enthused at that prospect. “I mean, uh… Like you were in a blue film, or…?” He trailed off as he suddenly realized what Tony probably meant.

“Uhh.” Tony’s expression was difficult to read. “Well, I was just talking about the knock off pornos, some guy with a business suit and a poorly maintained goatee banging a bunch of blondes. But, uh.” He rubbed at his eyebrow. “There were some definite lapses in judgment, when I was younger. Some tapes I made when I was too… inebriated to think the better of it, and had extremely poor taste in partners. They’re probably still floating around the internet, if you take the safe search off.”

It was said flippantly, but Steve spent a lot of time watching Tony. He could see the slight edge to his smile, the twist of his ankle that meant he actually was a little embarrassed, even if he was playing it off. 

“It’s Iron Man,” Steve told him quickly. “It’s definitely Iron Man. Something about that suit… I don’t know.” He shrugged helplessly.

“Ah, well then.” Tony was still grinning, wide and bright, but for just an instant it seemed like his eyes had dimmed slightly. “Remind me to adjust your permissions so you’re not allowed down here alone, huh?” 

Steve rolled his eyes. “Tony.” 

Tony waggled his eyebrows at him, laughing, but he was turning away and it felt like something had shifted between them. Steve couldn’t help feeling like he was disappointed, somehow. He couldn’t get a read on him, but Tony had been licking his lips an awful lot and, well. Steve had always been a bit of an insufferable idealist.

“I mean,” he started, before he could talk himself out of it. “I also didn’t know that Tony Stark was an option, so… That might change things, a little… Now…” 

Tony had gone still, his back a straight line, and with a sinking feeling Steve started to wonder if he’d gotten it entirely wrong. 

“I mean, um. Unless that makes you uncomfortable, in which case… I mean, I would never violate your privacy and look at your tapes, but if even the idea freaks you out, I just…” He winced as Tony turned around again, openly grinning at him again. “I just mean if it freaks you out we can forget I ever said anything,” he finished lamely. He could feel his skin growing hotter and he heaved out a sigh before burying his face in his hands. “Don’t suppose you have a built-in feature that let’s the floor open up and swallow me whole?” he mumbled into his skin. 

“No,” Tony told him, and there was laughter in his voice. “But I’ll get to work on that right away.” 

Steve just nodded, still hiding his face as he waited for the flaming heat of his skin to die down a little. Before it did though, Tony was kicking his ankle. 

“Hey. Steve, you’re fine. I’m not mad. I’m really, really not mad.” 

Steve nodded again, finally lifting his head back up although he couldn’t quite bring himself to look at Tony directly. “Right, well. I’m going to quit the team and become a vigilante instead. Maybe make my own costume… I’ve always liked blue and yellow.” 

He made no actual attempt to leave though, couldn’t seem to manage to remove himself from Tony’s orbit. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Tony chewing at his lip. 

“You know,” Tony said after a minute. “I never actually told anyone this, not even Rhodey — don’t know why, we were dating for fuck’s sake. But uh.” He shook his head, realizing he was distracted. “When I was a kid, I had this vintage Captain America poster on my wall?” 

Steve's head snapped over to look at him, feeling his breath catch in his chest. Tony shook his head, grinning a little foolishly. 

“Come on, Steve. You know where I’m going with this.”

Steve shrugged, grinning at him helplessly. “Tell me anyway.” 

Meeting his eyes, Tony kept perfect eye contact as he continued. “So when I was a little older, I started getting these urges…” He smirked when Steve rolled his eyes. “Spent a lot of nights jerking off to that poster, Steve. Fantasizing about, well… You. And honestly? Not a lot has changed since then.” He pushed off the table he was leaning against, moving forward. Steve’s heart stopped as Tony stalked toward him until he was close enough that Steve could practically feel his breath on his lips. “Tony Stark is definitely an option,” he breathed.

For a moment silence hung between them, heavy as Tony waited for Steve to make the next move. And then all at once Steve surged forward, hands curling tight around Tony’s hips as he yanked him up tight against his body. He’d probably used a little more force that was strictly necessary, but judging by the way Tony’s eyes darkened, and the soft, breathy noise he made, he didn’t mind in the slightest. Steve hesitated only a moment longer, eyes locked with Tony’s, before he leaned in to kiss him. It was gentle at first, a little tentative, but then Tony made another soft, needy noise, and Steve couldn’t stop himself from reacting, pushing the kiss deeper, licking along the seam of Tony’s lips until he opened up for him, kissing him until Tony was out of breath and pulling back with heavy panting breaths. 

They stood there, grinning goofily at each other for a ridiculously long minute before Tony finally cleared his throat. “So, Cap? Did I measure up to all your fantasies?”

“More than,” Steve told him quickly, not even giving it a second thought. “Jesus Christ, Tony.” His hands flexed on Tony’s hips, and then he was drawing him in for another kiss, feeling his knees go a little weak as he felt Tony’s cock hardening against his thigh. 

“Um.” Tony was looking a little flushed when they pulled away again, and Steve delighted in the fact. “No pressure, if you’re not up for it.” He snickered then, pressing his face into Steve’s shoulder for a minute as he got his ridiculous laugh under control. “Metaphorically speaking, since I can tell part of you is very up for it.” He emphasized this with a purposeful grind of his leg against Steve’s dick and Steve groaned in exasperation even as he nearly choked at the sensation. “What is it I see in you again?” 

Tony beamed at him, and then his hands were curling around the back of Steve’s neck, dragging him down for another kiss that had Steve seeing stars. 

“That,” he told him smugly, and Steve couldn’t even argue. “But as I was saying, if you want, we could, uh… See how many more of your fantasies we can bring to life?” 

He was waggling his eyebrows like an absolute idiot, but there was also something soft and tentative and a little nervous in his expression. It cleared a moment later, when Steve nodded his head so fast that he nearly gave himself whiplash. “Yeah, that uh… That sounds good. Please.” 

Tony’s grin grew impossibly wider, and then he was turning around, heading for the far corner of the lab. “Normally I’d try to impress you with my incredible view and high thread count sheets,” he said, glancing over a shoulder and snickering when he caught Steve blatantly checking out the bounce of his ass. “But uh… You’ve already seen all that, and I honestly don’t think I can stand to wait long enough to get you upstairs.” He plopped himself down on the side of the cot he kept down there, legs spread wide, and crooked his fingers at Steve. “C’mere, baby.” 

Steve eyed the cot skeptically. “I don’t think that’s gonna hold us,” he told him, although it didn’t stop him from practically sprinting over to join him. 

“Relax, handsome. It’s reinforced for Iron Man. We’ll be just fine. It’s science.”

Steve was skeptical about this particular brand of ‘science’ but Tony was leaning back against the mattress now, arching an eyebrow at him enticingly. His t-shirt had rucked up a little, revealing a deliciously tanned bit of skin at his hip, and the image was too good to resist. Steve moved forward until he was kneeling on the mattress, straddling Tony’s hips and looming over him. Tony licked his lips, staring up at him with wide eyes, and Steve leaned down to kiss him, groaning as their upper bodies pressed together.

“Fuck,” he cursed, couldn’t stop himself from grinding down against him, toes curling at the pressure on his cock. “Jesus, Tony. Wanted this for so long.” 

Tony bit his lip, looking absolutely delighted, and then he was leaning back until he was flat on his back, spreading his legs to make room for Steve in between them. He curled a hand in Steve’s wrinkled t-shirt and tugged at it. “This? Needs to come off.” 

“You first,” Steve told him, trying to at least pretend like he was cool.

Tony arched an eyebrow, looking like he was considering arguing just on the principle of it, but then he relented, sitting up a little to haul his t-shirt up over his head. He didn’t give Steve time to look before he was grabbing at the hem of his shirt too, yanking until Steve shifted enough to let him pull it off over his head, leaving his hair rumpled and messy. Tony grinned at him, combing it back from his hair in a surprisingly soft gesture. Then his eyes were drifting lower, catching somewhere around Steve’s nipples.

“Christ, look at you,” he mumbled. His hips rocked up and Steve groaned, fingers clenching against Tony’s hips, grinding down against him again. 

“Tony,” he gasped, head tipping forward to press against his shoulder. Tony huffed out a low laugh, and he slid a hand down Steve’s chest, tracing the lines of his pecs and making Steve pant into his skin. “Tony,” he said again. “Shit, I’m —,”

“Yeah?” Tony asked. He sounded like he was smirking. “Feel good?” 

Steve nodded, unable to put into words exactly how sensitive his chest was. His cock ached and he couldn’t seem to stop himself from grinding down against Tony over and over, feeling his balls pulling up tight. He mouthed desperately over Tony’s neck, sucking against his skin, and Tony’s legs tightened around his hips, his fingers tangling in the strands of Steve’s hair and tugging just hard enough to send sharp fizzles of pleasure shooting up Steve’s spine. 

“Me too,” Tony hummed, rubbing up against him. “God Steve, you feel amazing.” 

He groaned deep in his throat, tilting his head when Steve’s teeth scraped over his pulse point. And then his hand was shifting again, pinching and rubbing over Steve’s nipple. Steve’s eyes went wide and sightless, and he sobbed a moan into Tony’s neck as he came right there, grinding down against Tony as he dragged out his orgasm. 

“Oh god,” he muttered when he felt like he could breathe again. “Oh fuck.”

He could feel Tony’s hand rubbing soft and soothing over the back of his neck, and he squirmed a little in embarrassment. 

“Um.” He lifted his head to give Tony a somewhat sheepish look. “Hey.” 

“Hey.” Tony was grinning back at him, actually looking pleased. He shifted a little, moving back until he was on the bed properly, sitting up and leaning into the couple of pillows at the head of the bed, half dragging Steve with him owing to the way they were all tangled up together. His grin grew wider when he was met with Steve’s flushed face, and he brushed a flop of hair back from his forehead. “Don’t worry about it, Cap,” he told him, his other hand stroking absently over Steve’s thigh. “Happens to the best of us. Honestly, I’m flattered that I--,” 

Tony cut himself as his hand shifted over a little too far and Steve made a faint, punched out noise. For a long minute Tony just blinked at him, and then, deliberately this time, he gripped Steve through his sweatpants, thumb rubbing over the head of his still-hard cock through the damp material.

“Jesus fucking Christ,” he breathed, soft like Steve wasn’t supposed to hear. “Are you… Again? Already??” 

“Uh.” Steve felt his cheeks flush even deeper red. “Well, still. But yeah.” 

A high-pitched, desperate noise slipped out of Tony’s mouth and his hands pulled away from Steve, clenching against the sheets like he was trying not to come himself. “Is…” He cleared his throat and tried again. “Is this a common thing, or am I just special?” 

“Yes,” Steve answered before he’d even fully processed the question. “Yes, you’re definitely special.” He watched Tony’s face go soft and a little flustered at how sincere he was. “But uh… Two or three times is pretty much the norm for me.” 

Tony blew out a long breath, shaking his head and looking absolutely thrilled. “I am one lucky man.” 

Steve couldn’t help smirking at him. “Not yet,” he told him. “But you’re about to get very lucky.” 

Tony blinked at him, then started laughing, and while he was still cackling delightedly, Steve ambushed him. Getting his hands around Tony’s hips, he yanked him down a little lower. Amusement still on his face, Tony looked up at him with an arched eyebrow, clearly waiting for Steve’s next move. Steve ran his palms up and down over Tony’s thighs, noting the way Tony’s eyes followed the motion, the way his abs clenched at how big Steve’s hands were against his legs. 

“Can I…?”Steve didn’t finish the question, instead shifting his hand to toy with the button of Tony’s jeans. Tony swallowed hard and nodded, staring at Steve with wide, dark eyes. 

“Be my guest.”

His cock twitched.

With one orgasm out of the way, Steve was feeling more relaxed, not quite so desperate as before. He couldn’t resist teasing Tony now, sliding his hands up his thighs again, thumbs on either side of his cock, not quite touching him through his jeans. He felt the strong muscles in Tony’s legs clench, flicked his eyes up to see Tony open his mouth like he wanted to protest only to clench his jaw and keep quiet, eyeing Steve as he waited for his next move. Steve grinned and rewarded him with a quick stroke of his thumb over the bulge in the denim, his own cock giving a gratified twitch at the sharp inhale that Tony couldn’t quite hold back. 

“You’re a fucking tease,” Tony breathed, sounding both surprised and pleased by this revelation. Steve looked up at him again, gave him a wink, and took advantage of Tony’s resulting eyeroll to thumb open the button of his jeans.

Tony groaned at that, the sound coming from deep in his chest, the perfect blend of aroused and content. His hips twitched a little as some of the pressure was relieved and when Steve’s eyes tracked the movement, Tony rocked them again intentionally, letting his pants slide a little lower on his hips. 

Steve grinned, and instead of opening his pants further, he curled his hands around Tony’s thighs again, easily spreading his legs wider, just because he could. 

“Can I blow you?” he asked, just to see if he could pull another one of those incredible sounds out of Tony. This one was better, a high pitched breathy noise, like Steve had left him utterly shocked for a brief moment. 

“Yes,” Tony told him, nodding a little frantically and mussing up his hair against the pillows. “Yes, absolutely. Hell, Steve. You get these pants off me, and you can do whatever the fuck you want.” 

“Oh yeah?” Steve grinned and settled himself between Tony’s legs, unable to resist rocking down against the mattress for a moment. His own pants were starting to feel sticky and uncomfortable now, and he considered a minute before shoving them off entirely, the movement quick and perfunctory. 

Tony made a soft noise, clearly disappointed that he wasn’t getting a better view, and Steve hid his smile against his hip. Without further ado, Steve slid Tony’s zipper down and then shoved his jeans down over his hips. Tony moved with him easily, as in sync with each other as ever, arching and wiggling in the appropriate moments to get himself unclothed as quickly as possible. When he saw the bright red silky thing that Tony was wearing underneath, the thin fabric straining against the weight of his hardon, Steve had to take a minute to just shake his head. 

“Jesus Christ,” he muttered. “You’re so fucking… Decadent.” 

“You say that like it’s a bad thing. Nothing wrong with a little decadence, Steve. You ever try anything besides those cotton boxer briefs you like so much? I’ve got a hookup, if you wanted to... expand your horizons, a little.” Tony’s gaze went a little unfocused, mind jumping seventeen steps ahead, as usual. “God, you’d look amazing in something lacy. Maybe a pretty little thong, show off that ridiculous butt of yours. Or--,” 

Tony made a noise dangerously close to a squeal as Steve, without any warning, cut him off by dipping his head, sucking at him through the fabric. Tony clapped a hand over his mouth, like he could somehow take the sound back. “Or that. That’s good too.”

Steve huffed out a laugh, drawing another gasp out of Tony as the sensation vibrated up his dick. “You got it, boss,” he hummed, grinning when Tony shifted beneath his hands. 

“You’re such an asshole,” Tony protested, although he was laughing. Steve just looked up at him and winked again; if Tony thought he was an asshole, he could show him a real asshole. 

Taking his time, Steve placed gentle, sucking kisses up the length of his thick cock, still through the silky red fabric, more of a tease than any real pressure. Tony shuddered, whining under his breath, and out of the corner of his eye, Steve saw his fingers twist in the sheets beside his hips. 

Steve pulled back long enough to catch Tony’s hands in his, meeting his eyes steadily as he placed them on the back of his head and gave Tony a pointed look. 

“Jesus Christ,” Tony groaned, head tipping back. It didn’t stop his fingers from tangling in Steve’s hair. “This is not what I was expecting from you.” 

Steve shivered at the idea that Tony might have thought about this before. “Well, you know me. I’m just full of surprises.” He didn’t give Tony a chance to answer before he ducked lower, nuzzling at his balls. Tony made a pained noise, like it was so good he couldn’t stand it, and tightened his legs around Steve’s shoulders. Steve grinned and moved his hands back to Tony’s thighs, sliding them up and running the pads of his fingers through the coarse hair there. He slid them up until they were sliding under the elastic at the tops of his legs, teasing the skin hidden from view. He watched Tony’s cock twitch again, as he slid toward the crease of his groin. 

“Fuck,” Tony groaned, yanking at Steve’s hair until he shuddered. His voice was rough and hoarse. “Steve, if you don’t get these fucking things off of me…” 

Steve grinned, dipping his head to scrape his teeth over Tony’s hipbone. But he was itching for more too, and relented after that, pulling his hands free to grab at the waistband instead. Tony made a pleased sound, arching his hips to help Steve slide the fitted material down over his legs. 

“Shit,” Steve breathed as he was met with Tony’s thick cock, flushed and full, curving up toward his belly. “Look at you.” He blew out a slow breath, grinning when it breezed over Tony’s sensitive skin, making his cock twitch and back arch again. 

“Steve,” he groaned. “Steve, come on. Give me more, I need more. Please.” 

Steve shivered, rewarded Tony with a lick from base to tip. “I like the sound of that,” he said, hearing how low his own voice had gone. “You saying please.”

“Yeah?” Tony was grinning, obviously playing all cool and collected, but Steve had seen the wall his cock had throbbed. “You gonna make me beg, Rogers?” 

“Maybe.” Steve settled back between Tony’s legs, teasing his legs with his tongue and teeth, avoiding his cock altogether. Tony made a soft whining noise, trying to push himself closer, tugging at Steve’s hair to try and get him where he wanted, but Steve responded by pinning his hips to the mattress, holding him still as he mapped out the sensitive parts of his body, the places that made Tony twitch and moan and tug reflexively at the strands of Steve’s hair. He didn’t relent, no matter how much Tony tried, teasing him until he was a panting, shifting mess, head rolling back against the pillows as Steve wound him up until he couldn’t see straight. 

“Fu-uck,” Tony gasped, arching his back and tipping his head back. His neck made an enticing image, and for a moment Steve was distracted, thinking about how badly he wanted to mark it up. “Okay, Christ, you win. Please Steve, please. I’ll do anything, just please. Fucking touch me. Let me come, Steve, please.” 

Steve had ignored his own erection in favour of tormenting Tony, but it came back with a vengeance at the sound of Tony begging for him, his cock throbbing between his legs. He ground down against the mattress once, stroked a thumb over the curve of Tony’s hipbone. 

“Yeah,” he said, suddenly done with teasing. “Yeah, sweetheart. Whatever you want, you got it.” And then, because he’d always be a troll, he glanced up at Tony with a wicked smile. “Hey, did you know that I can hold my breath for fifteen minutes?” 

And while Tony was still parsing that in his flustered state, Steve curled his hand around the base of his cock and lowered his head, not stopping until Tony was pressing into his throat and Steve was groaning around his mouthful. 

“Oh Christ,” Tony wailed, hips bucking despite having nowhere else to go. He yanked hard at Steve’s hair, and Steve felt it in his balls. “Oh fuck, Steve, your fucking mouth.” He rocked desperately against him, going nearly cross-eyed as Steve sucked around him. He cursed and shifted as Steve pulled slowly off his cock, tongued at the head, before sucking him back down again. “I’m not… You can’t… Don’t judge me cause I’m gonna come in about two -- fuck!” 

Steve’s free hand moved, thumb rubbing harshly over his perineum, and for a brief moment Tony went stock still before he was coming hard, hands holding Steve’s head down as he came down his throat. The feeling was too much for Steve, who rocked down hard against the mattress, spilling against the sheets. 

It was a minute before Tony’s hands let go enough for Steve to pull off, panting more from the thrill of his orgasm than from any real exertion. He rubbed his sweaty forehead against the smooth skin of Tony’s abdomen, feeling it flex as he tried to catch his breath, and he grinned as Tony’s hand resettled on the back of his head, combing absently over the short strands. 

“Oh fuck,” Tony finally said, sounding like he’d only just remembered how to speak. “Oh fuck, that was… That was incredible, Steve.” There was no teasing in his voice, sweet and sincere, and Steve felt a warm, comfortable weight settle over him at the sound. 

Lifting himself up on slightly shaking limbs, he crawled up the mattress until he was face-to-face with Tony again, flopping down on the pillows beside him. It was a tight fit, but gave him an excuse to wrap an arm around Tony’s waist. “Yeah,” he admitted, aware that he was grinning like an absolute idiot. “Yeah, it really was.” 

Tony grinned back at him, equally stupidly, and then leaned forward, kissing Steve all slow and lazy now. 

“Oh hey,” he said, pulling back suddenly. “Sorry about, uh…” He gestured vaguely between them. “Coming down your throat without asking like that. Terrible sex etiquette.” 

Steve snorted, pressing his head to Tony’s collarbone as he laughed giddily. “It’s fine,” he promised him. “I wouldn’t’ve let you if I didn’t want it.” He lifted his head again to find Tony watching him with that same soft expression and he reached out, catching Tony’s hand and toying with his long fingers. “So. What now?” he asked, not quite meeting Tony’s eyes. 

“Now?” Tony repeated. “Now I’m thinking we take a shower, get cleaned up, and then maybe go upstairs and crawl into my bigger, more comfortable bed for a couple hours together?” He trailed off a little hopefully, and Steve looked up at him, felt his breath catch. “And then, uh…” Tony ducked his head and twisted his wrist so he could rub his thumb over Steve’s pulse point. “Then maybe I could take you to dinner? I’ve got this little Italian place I think you’d love.” 

“Yes,” Steve told him, and it was entirely too earnest but Tony didn’t look like he minded at all. “Yes, that sounds perfect.”

@tonystarkbingo

[weiwuxian-lanzhan]

My Not-Coming out story

So a few years ago I came out to all of my closest friends as Bisexual. I did this while a little drunk, and then cried during the whole thing. My friends were awesome, confused because I had never let on, but were ultimately accepting.

(This is where I tell the stupid story of me being way way drunker a few weeks later, assuming that coming out was easy, and telling a bunch of random acquaintances about being bi before throwing up. The up side is that the guy I was into held my hair up while I threw up and was 100% ok with me being bi because his two male friends had hooked up for the experience of it, and the two of us became friends with benefits later).

But my main tragic story happens after my reveal to my friends, with me trying to decide whether to reveal to my family. So I am at Thanksgiving with my family, and my sister’s extended family, so there are a bunch of new strangers at this gathering that add a bit of unexpected problems. So I decide to approach this delicately, testing the waters if you will.

So somehow (alcohol is how, but goddamn if I know the logical train) I end up in my favorite test the waters train of thought: bi erasure in media. I start a conversation with my father about how bisexual people either don’t exist, or are completely misrepresented as greedy sex fiends who will have sex with any one at any time. My father, in a goddam stroke of luck from my bisexual heart, is actually listening to what I have to say. I have no fucking clue what he is thinking, but in his usual “I’m a fiscal republican but I hate their social policies” way he is actually fucking listening.

And then my sister, from across the room, who had apparently been listening to my rant, chimed in. “Bisexuals don’t exist”

“Um.... yes they do,” said the actual bisexual in the room. 

“I guess,” my sister replied, “But they’re tiny in number.”

“Actually!” I refuted, while being petrified that my knowledge of LGBT statistics would out me. “Bisexual people represent more than 50% of the entire LGBT community, which is why their exclusion in LGBT media is a problem, hence my original point!”

“Pfft!” my sister said. “Sure,” she amended, dripping with sarcasm (a phrase I hate but resonates with me here).

So years and years later, my mantra is this: Don’t bother the social conservatives with my bisexuality until I have a long term partner of the same sex that I want to bring home. Since this has never happened, I am still in the closet with my relatives.

Many people talk about how being open about who you are is freeing. And I am so, so glad that I came out to my friends years ago because they have been nothing but supportive. But I feel like the decision to come out as bi to my parents has come down to this: will I be more loved if I don’t tell them.

To me this answer seems to be: Yes

And I don’t think of my parents as hateful people. I think that they think of homosexually and bisexually as things that are fine, as long as they happen to other people, not my children. 

I long to be proven wrong, to learn that my parents are actually the best LGBT allies in the world once they know that one of their children is a part of that space, but I just don’t have the optimism that would make me make that leap of faith from “I hope you are this way even though I don’t have any evidence” to “I’m going to assume you are this way and base all my future family interactions on this one leap of faith.”

Basically, I’m not that strong. And, fuck, I shouldn’t have to be. The world should be better so I don’t have to spend so much energy on this fucking bullshit every fucking day.      

[tessatechaitea]

Team Titans #23

Redwing must have been furious when she didn't make the Birds of Prey roster.

The good news is that I'm almost done reading all of the Team Titans comic books I own. The gooder news is that I'm almost done reading all of the New Titans comic books I own! The most goodest news of all is that I'm still alive somehow. Although that's only good news in the sense that, by being alive, I can appreciate being alive. The news that I were dead would be just fine with me as well because I wouldn't have to hear it. The good news about the bad news of my death is that none of you would hear of it either! You'd all just believe that I got bored of writing comic book reviews and went off to live on a beautiful tropic island full of kittens. After I finish reading Team Titans and New Titans, I'll have to dig out another old series to reread. I'm excited to find out what it will be! I was on Twitter earlier and was perplexed by this person's response to a Tom King tweet. If a smarter reader than me could explain what he meant, I'd truly appreciate it!

My current theories: 1. He's just a Trumpist and knows Tom King isn't a white supremacist asshole so he simply assumes this tweet is somehow mocking Trump. 2. The Tweet didn't delve inside the mind of the protagonist thus relying too much on the reader using their own mind to form conclusions of the protagonist's intent, making it a 'difficult' read. 3. The person replying probably just responds this way to all of Tom King's tweets because Batman isn't punching enough villains these days.

This issue begins with Jensen practicing some of his beat poetry.

Snap! Snap! Snap!

Snap! Snap! Snap!

Snap! Snap! Snap!

Audience nods smartly while puffing nonchalantly on long cigarettes.

Redwing has transformed into a woman with the head of a bird and huge talons on her hands. If any of these Team Titans had a romantic interest in her, they'd probably be thinking, "Did her anus, vagina, and urethra just merge into a cloaca?" But apparently none of them do have that kind of interest because none of them are currently throwing up the way I am after having that thought. But now I'm also thinking of Hawkman and Hawkwoman's sex talk. "Let's kiss cloacae, baby!" While everybody tries to pretend Redwing is still the same person she's always been (except grosser), Chimera reminds the Team Titans that other totally-not-monsters-just-because-they-look-like-human/animal-hybrid creatures are trying to kill them. For some reason, Redwing attacks the other Team Titans. Maybe she's just trying to get them to admit that they all think she's a monster now. If that was her plan, it works because Lapidus is all, "If you're intent on proving you're as much a monster inside as well as out, then you'll have to go through me!" Idiot! You're not supposed to say she looks like a monster to her face! You're supposed to act more like her brother Prester Jon and avoid eye contact and tugging at the inside of your shirt collar and mumbling things like, "Yikes!" At least that allows you to deny your true feelings when she confronts you about why you're acting so weird.

Me at prom.

Sometimes I completely understand that I'm reviewing comic books that never wanted me as an audience. I don't care what young person is infatuated with what other young person, or how much bullshit drama one member of the team can create for no reason at all. If I was, I would be a fan of the Legion of Super-heroes. So if I hate this comic book with such passion that I've certainly spontaneously created at least five kidney stones within me, it really shouldn't reflect on the comic book at all. I'm sure somebody cares that Killowat has a crush on Mirage but he's also a racist piece of shit. I'm sure somebody cares that Terra has littered the Troy Family Farm with stone dildos because Changeling won't fuck her. I'm sure somebody cares that Prestor Jon has an issue with his sister because she doesn't look as human as she used to (while it's okay for him to look like Stretch Armstrong). But that someone is not me. I don't think it ever was me. Half the comic books I own were purchased because of simple momentum. I bought the first issue and felt compelled to buy the second issue and, well, fuck it? Why not just keep buying them no matter how terrible they were?! I know that doesn't say anything positive about my decision making but then I've also never claimed to be good at making decisions. The fact that I read every comic book of The New 52 for six or seven years proves that! Prester Jon refers to Qurac as "hell on Earth" which Chimera has opinions on.

"Hell! What a western concept! But, I mean, you're right and I'm going to go along with that characterization so I don't even know why I pointed that out!" I didn't say she had strong opinions on it.

Chimera mentions that she last met the Team Titans in Team Titans Annual #1. Fuck! I didn't review that issue! I'm sure I own it but it might be stored with all of the Bloodlines Annuals. Well, I guess I can review it whenever I find it during my reread of all of my thousands of comic books from the last forty years!

It's true that I never expected Peter David's Aquaman but I certainly wasn't waiting for it.

Prester Jon tries to discover what caused Redwing's transformation (as well as that of the human/animal hybrids outside) while a young Quraci girl looks at Redwing and cries. I think it's supposed to be touching how the little girl can't communicate but she can feel emotions. Although it would be better if she could communicate because, for some reason, she knows the entire backstory as to how and why people became mutant animal monsters. Something about how aliens crashed in the desert and Circe saw they could be used to make human/animal hybrids but some of the aliens died in the desert and when Cheshire nuked Qurac, the aliens were atomized and everybody breathed in cremated alien space DNA. It's totally the kind of thing a little girl would know all about. Chimera shows Killowat and Terra that the Americans have come to Qurac to save the oil and not the people. That sets off Killowat's Angry Right Wing Logic Centers.

Oh? Is criticizing America's foreign policy of protecting investments considered politically correct? Although doesn't this anger and argument seem tame from a 2019 perspective?

Anybody who begins an argument with "I refuse to believe" is a person with whom I immediately stop arguing. It's a great opening tactic because I appreciate your desire to not waste my time by immediately revealing that you won't be listening to facts and evidence. Also, "I refuse to believe America would rape a country of its resources at the expense of saving the people" may as well be a declaration that you spent most of your time in history class yelling, "Nyah nyah nyah nyah! I can't hear you!" Not that America's public educational system was particularly great at exposing America's imperialistic abuse! There's definitely a reason right wing thinkers believe college educations turn people into leftists. Because it does! Leftists are just rational people who aren't viewing the world through the lens of preconceived opinions! College educations are less about broad generalizations and more about trying to put history in as much context as possible. Patriots are often as blind as people of faith. One of the conditions of being faithful is to not question your faith. It's right there in the word! So any examination of your faith is questioning that which you shouldn't question. Being a patriot is the exact same thing. If you question our government, you're against our government. There's no belief in trying to improve our government because it's an acceptance of flaws in the United States. Of course now that's simply become a way to not ever question anything a Republican does because obviously everything any Democrat does is completely wrong. It's believing in tribe over anything else. I am not a Democrat because I believe whatever the fuck every Democrat believes. Hell, I'm not even technically a Democrat! I am liberal, sure. But I don't support any idea or belief from what would be considered my tribe. And neither are a lot of liberals which is why you have trouble with Democratic voter turnout. Every Republican nominee is practically interchangeable. As long as they spout the handful of talking points important to the accepted base (2nd amendment, anti-abortion, Christian values, white supremacy...I mean states rights!), they'll do. But Democrats have the constant fight over whether a candidate will lose voters if they move left away from center while hardly ever acknowledging how many votes they'll gain as they move left. I've always said they should abandon all those assholes at the center. If you're only voting Democrat because you support their social views but don't want higher taxes maybe you're actually a Republican. Because if the Democratic party moves further left and you abandon it because of taxes to side with the gun toting fetuses who support locking up refugees on our southern border, who the fuck wants you at that party anyway?! Back to the comic book, the Team Titans speculate that the cremated alien DNA has combined with the tainted oil in Qurac and the metagenes in certain individuals to transform them into monsters. So now they've got to destroy all of America's profits by making sure the oil isn't sold all over the world. Killowat is all, "I can't believe we're going to save the world at the risk of America's profits!" I mean, he doesn't say that explicitly. But I can read between his racist and xenophobic lines.

Finally an argument that wins him over!

Look, I get being resistant to truth! Whenever I brush my teeth, I can't help thinking about the Barney song where they mime brushing with huge toothbrushes and sing, "While I'm brushing my teeth and having so much fun, I never let the water run!" And then I just let the water run! I know, I know. I'm a fucking monster! Terra and Killowat solve the problem by putting the contaminated oil back into the ground. That seems scientifically sound enough that I won't bother questioning it like a college-educated leftist. But Killowat assures Chimera that she hasn't won the argument even though her argument was simply, "Maybe you should question your government sometimes, idiot." Meanwhile the animal people attack the other Titans upstairs. The Titans can't kill them because they were once people (although I guess if they had always been sentient monster people, it would have been okay to kill them? Sometimes I'm not entirely sure of comic book superhero rules). They solve their problem by sending them into a Fairy Land via one of Chimera's portals. She was hesitant to do it earlier because she didn't know if what transformed them was catching. But now that Prester Jon somehow did science and figured out what happened, everybody agrees it's okay to banish them to a world where they'll never see their loved ones again and nobody will work out how to save them and they'll probably just turn on each other when they get hungry. Superman throwing every villain into the Phantom Zone has left a terrible example for young heroes to follow!

Oh the 90s! When every time anybody said anything, you had to wait a few seconds to see whether or not they really believed what they just said!

Later Killowat acts like a total jerk. But he acts like a different kind of total jerk than he usually acts like. So after he's done, he says, "Whoa! What just happened?! Is that shadowy person on the ground hiding behind the tree controlling me?! And who might it be?! ZERO HOUR!" Team Titans #23 Rating: B-. They sure used to pack a lot of story and words into comic books, didn't they?! And for only $1.95! That's two dollars less than the crappy comics DC puts out today that have four less pages and far less story every month! And it's three dollars less than Marvel books! No wonder Marvel is more popular. People probably look at the price and think, "Whoa! I'm getting a whole dollar more quality out of this comic book than that stupid DC comic book!" It also might help that Marvel doesn't mind having synopses of the story to help new readers or old readers whose memories aren't that great anymore. DC refuses to do the same, instead relying on the writer wasting two or three pages of actual story where characters think about what happened in the previous issue. A lot of DC books suck in collected formats!

[sorensfw]

Hello!! I hope you are doing well, wonderful person! I was wondering if I could have a tarot reading? I wanted to ask the cards what obstacles are in my way and how can I overcome them? Also, can I ask the cards where should I look to continue to find strength and resilience? Thank you so much!!! Sending you lots of love.

Aww! Thank you. Having these readings really picked me up today, so...I’m doing well now. On to your reading, which kind of got big.

Deep Images[1], what obstacles are in Imisterk's way, and how can she remove them?

Deck: Silicon Dawn

This is going to be interesting, because the SD is the most Occult Magick X-Filezzz Mysterious deck I have. I keep expecting it to tell me where the aliens are landing and how to help them dethrone the reptilons embedded in the secret one world government. Adjust your tinfoil hat psychoacoustic filters accordingly. I recommend setting Alpha-six point Gamma on the flourenstein scale[2]. It's also capable of rendering serious doom and gloom readings, which is probably why it was right for reading obstacles.

Obstacles (first row, in order):

1. Fleeing ghosts of the past is leading to doing something Foolish--but this might be Foolish in the tarot sense (the physical version of this card has reflective overprinting that catches the light at the right angle and shows phantom butterfly wings on the Fool and ghostly tentacles chasing them), because it is a Fool card (this deck has four Fools).

2. A fight that just wont end, but would if you could just talk things out. Probably with someone close to you--think seventh house relationships in the astrology sense (enemies are 'close' because why bother being enemies with someone you can just forget about).

3. (Shadowed, incomplete reading here) Something about masks over your uniqueness rubbing it out (The physical version of the card looks completely black unless seen from the right angle). You're special and unusual, and this is an obstacle against having a face that isn't just the mask you wear to fit in at the party. Something I can't read for, which could be shrouded by something really powerful, or could be that I'm running into reading someone's private thoughts who isn't consenting, which is something I specifically intend my readings not to do.

4. (Shadowed again) There's a place inside you that's always watching a lightless black sun go down over the edge of a dying world where even the swords made of rusted shards of Before The Fall the last survivors have been using to squabble over the dregs of lost joy are played out. It's making everything feel as apocalyptic as that vision looks, and it's sapping a precious bodily fluid spiritual resource in a way that's not obvious, because this whole drama is happening in darkness where you don't see it going on.

Solution (second row, read left to right): Don't do complicated magic or call for help. Small actions will accumulate into world-shattering consequences if you trust and fall with it and don't make a big deal of things or try to rekindle stuff whose time is past.

This a surprisingly un-Silicon-Dawn answer, so take that into account.

Phew. Onward:

Deep Images, where should Imisterk look to continue to find strength and resilience?

Deck: Mystic Manga

...when it didn't come up Silicon Dawn again I was going to say we were back to the real world, but with the Mystic Manga it's more like we're off to read right-to-left about about the hapless Fool not noticing that all sixteen court cards have a crush on his bishie ass and are vying for his hand in mawwiage--but it's also off to a colorful happy fantasy land where everyone including you is suave and sexy and omigod those outfits right?

The reading is a mini-love-story spread, but that can mean self-love, too. Left to right the cards go:

1. Your role

2. Your work

3. Happily Ever After

4. Their work

5. Their role

It's read from the edges in.

Because of my other-people rule this usually means both partners are the querent, but that might be false if you have someone I don't know about who wouldn't mind contributing to this reading, so I'm going to read that aspect ambiguously and let you decide which you think it is.

Your role: R. 5 Wands. Something's happening. Whatever it is, don't fight it, even if the fighting-it doesn't seem that serious or is like a game. If and only if that feels fucking wrong, instead it's the other extreme: go nuclear and fight for your life--but I really doubt that for such a happy-cuddly deck.

Your work: 5 Cups. Things look kind of wrecked, and feeling better feels as far away as that castle, so the work is to see where they're not wrecked. It might seem like only two small little cups out of the many you had before, but there's enough water there to throw a party like the star is throwing in the next card. It may or may not be necessary to doff that wonderfully melancholy cape-and-buckles grief-chic ensemble, but I notice the Star's going for a more minimal look fashion-wise.

Their role: R. 6 Cups. Nostalgia, however much old times might look good, they're not a kid anymore and it's time to grow up.

Their work: High Priestess. Take a critical look at things, and don't hide your disgust (she's clearly editing her Abridged List of Things She Hates), but remember to look to your intuition, not what logically makes sense, or you'll end up just as Scroogy as she looks. Traditionally, there's a body of water peeking through the High Priestess' veil, and I read that as present here, too.

Happily Ever After: Star. Clothes have been a huge theme in this reading, and we weren’t even the doing anime-standard Deep Cleavage, when suddenly--! Both work cards have unhappy people in super-restrictive clothing and a distant body of water, and now here we are having a relaxing bath in the magical flowery lagoon of innocence with an expression that says to me “why yes I did suplex the angel with a flaming sword that turns every which way to get in here, and I’d do it again and still not give any fucks at all”. This is what happens when you and whoever it is move beyond your respective challenges and leave the armor behind. Maybe it means being vulnerable together, maybe it means sexy sex, or maybe it literally means busting out the bath bombs and essential oil diffuser and giving yourself a spa night every so often. The concrete advice depends on who's involved and whether you're in a position to figuratively or literally get naked wth them--but if you can, it will be like drinking the nectar of the gods for you both. Whatever it is, you may need to throw down a manifestation of patriarchal or religious shame or guilt or two to get at it, so don’t be afraid to rush the gatekeeper if they look like a republican senator. This would be that nuclear option from before, actually.

Good luck, and I hope this helps, and if you’re totally weirded out I hope you at least laughed along the way.

[1] It’s what I call the collective-unconscious imagery galaxies that underly the tarot archetypes and many other visual oracles. Past life thing, long story.

[2] I'm reasonably sure none of that is a real thing, but you never know.

[spread images created using BlackMirror]

[cuckiller-blog]

About the Killer...

Hello there person on the internet. I don't know you, but if you're reading this you will know me, or at least what I'm about. The name and description of this account pretty much says it all; pretty much...

I just want to clarify that I am fully aware that the terms "snowflake", "SJW" and "cuck" have been made popular due to extreme right Republican, mostly Trump supporters over the last few years; however, they don't own those terms nor are the first to use them. I am not a Trump supporter and never will be. As a matter of fact, Donald Trump is one of the biggest snowflakes I have ever witnessed. Getting butthurt over every little criticism, insulting people he once claimed he liked/respected because they say they don't agree with everything he does (pre and post presidential election mind you), etc... the man is a crybaby.

Just so we're clear here... A snowflake cuck is simply anyone, republican or democrat, liberal or conservative, who gets offended by every little thing or every little person under the reality sun who doesn't agree with their fragile sensibilities.

This goes for the following which I will be covering over time:

- Using certain terms/phrases which can be negative (grasp your chest and gasp now) to express emotions, but don't reflect that person's actual beliefs about human issues. I.E. If I say something is gay or call someone a faggot that doesn't mean I am against homosexual people, or their rights or that I'm protesting gay marriage in front of court houses. Sorry the word "straight" isn't used to describe dumb shit, but that doesn't mean everyone saying shit is gay means they hate gay people...

- Stating facts about people and their appearance..... Sorry fat people... If you're fat, you're fat. Sorry simple facts of life bother you so much. I know a few skinny people also hate being called skinny due to body issues, but it's far and few between fat people and the same still applies.... If you're fat, you're fat, if you're skinny, you're skinny, if you're whatever in between, you're whatever in between, doesn't always mean people are out to get you and doesn't mean they hate you or think you're ugly just cause you're FACTUALLY fat...

- Jokes/Stand-Up Comedy/Overly PC Fascist crowds... You are cancer, you are killing comedy because you don't know how to take a joke and not take everything seriously.... Do you not realize most of what comedians say they don't even truly believe IRL? Even if they do..... Who cares? As long as it's funny? Sorry, anything can be a joke, including rape. Doesn't mean they condone rape... If you can't understand that, move the fuck along snowflake. The PC culture has gone to the extremes in general as well, people can't say anything without being made to feel like pieces of shit because they say something someone may not like as a part of freedom of expression. I'm not even talking about people going around saying blatantly evil shit, those people are dicks, but I mean the most innocent of shit. Like if someone says "I have a friend who's an Indian, he lives on a reservation a few towns over." and people act like you just condemned that whole group to hell because you didn't call your FRIEND a "Native American!!!!" instead.... Lol..... Ugghhhhh.... Get a grip people......

- Millennials.... The epitome of the snowflake plaque..... Sure, not all millennials are snowflakes, but a good majority of them are. Much more than past generations..... They call it progressive behavior when really they are being fascists trying to control free speech and expression; especially at stand-up comedy acts..... Just gay as fuck.... Lol

- Asexuals/Sexual Shamers.... So now a days if you comment on someone's appearance as being "hot" or "sexy" these little pieces of shit wanna downvote and criticize said posts because they don't understand the simple fact that men have penises and women have vaginas and sometimes they see people in certain revealing clothing/poses that induce a sexually attracted response as a condition of being a normal human rather than some sexually repressed cuck.

- Feminazis...... Lol...... Just lol..... Not every person who has a penis and makes a seemingly funny or observational comment about the opposite sex is trying to strip away all of your rights or how strong or equal you can be. The difference between genuine feminists and feminazis is night and day....

Oversensitive/overprotective animal rights cucks..... Sorry bitch boy, it's not animal abuse, it's innocent fun so STFU about "Don't ever do that to that beautiful animal ever again! You don't deserve to have pets!" when it's clear the animal is not in danger and it's just good fun. You're a dumb shit and you know nothing about how well they care for their pets or their bond and simply judge them because some guy sneaked up behind his dog, yelled and made him jump or some shit? Gimme a break ya little bitch...

- Did you assume my/that person's gender!!!!? No shit stick, I don't assume when facts are concerned, I just go by said facts. Chances are if you look like a dude, you're a dude. If you look like a chick, you're a chick. If it quacks like a duck............. It probably calls you a cuck. Look, nobody cares if you identify as a woman, if you've got a 5 o'clock shadow, adam's apple and a penis taped to your thigh behind some dress, wig, and makeup, you're still a fuckin dude..... I'm not gonna call you a woman cause you identify as one "inside". I'm also not going to say a white guy is black because he identifies as a black man. I won't call you a cat because you're a human who identifies as a feline ya nutty bitch. Funny how that works eh? Gender is not fluid and it's not a choice. Nor is race or friggin' species. Lol....

You can turn yourself from male to female aesthetically and call yourself a woman, sure, and I'll most likely call you a woman if you actually look like a woman, but you're still factually not a woman. You don't have milk producing breasts or possess a real vagina or womb..... You can never get pregnant..... Never have a period...... Not a real woman..... Deal with it. "But Cuck Killer, some women can't get pregnant!" blah blah blah.... Yeah, we are all aware of this. It's also not the norm, and obviously even for women who can't get pregnant and whatnot......... Their vagina is still real/natural from birth soooo..... Yeeeeaaahhhhhh...... They are real women still...... Because..... ya know..... their vagina's weren't fashioned from half a mutilated penis..... This also applies to the cancerous "he/him" or "her/she" bullshit on some people's social media profiles. You don't need to proclaim your gender like that, nobody cares. This wasn't something people ever put in profiles to "clarify MY gender" up until a couple years ago. I go out of my way to call them the opposite gender of what they shove in your face to refer to them as just to see them blow their shit. Lol

It's also clear that when someone addresses a group of people and says "Hey, guys!" even when women are present, it's just a common greeting and "guys" in this context just means people.... Not literally calling the women males.... So relax and stop throwing a bitch fit when people say that. It's not always about gender specifics for crying out loud.

- LGBTQXYZSDL blah blah blah whatever it's initial count is up to at this very second of this minute of this hour. Look, I'm not against gay people, nor do I dislike them generally speaking. I am for gay marriage and all that jazz, so this isn't so much about the gay community but more so the people (not all of them are even gay, but they are snowflakes) who raise a big shit when you say "LGBT" but leave the Q off, or worse yet just say "gay/transgendered community" instead of the initials. They act like you just killed a baby right in front of them, calm down faggot, it's not that big of a deal. (Again, snowflakes, me saying faggot there doesn't mean I hate gay people, read above and note that I have no hate for homosexuals and faggot in this case simply means "dumb shit" lol).... How long will it be before they add a new initial to it and people shit their pants if you don't say "LGBTQBSHSKSBDGSN" in one breath without pausing to catch your breath in between? I cringe to see the day. LMAO

And more than likely more ridiculous shit as time goes on. Sure this list will be updated over time as dumb shit keeps happening.... But that is the gist of what this account will be about. Basically people getting offended and raising a stink over every little thing.

If you're still reading you either agree with me or you're a glutton for logical punishment. Either way, get those seat belts on!

[fortiekitso1979-blog]

Don let anyone guilt or rush you into something you not comfortable with.basically, no one wants to be a sucker. Both of you should have confidence that whatever you agreed on will be upheald by both in good faith. 3 points submitted 10 days agoI been doing intermittent fasting and it works pretty well, but I was never big on breakfast so it wasn a huge change.I make sure (at least most days) to have a meal of mostly veggies (cooked or salad) or a broth based soup, generally try to make nutritious choices for meals and snacks, and have reasonable portions of treats when I crave them. I remember being so stressed the trip wasn even really enjoyable. When we got home, I found my mother in law had went to our house and cleaned it spotless, did all of our laundry and took care of everything. I NEVER forget how good that felt to walk in and find the house in perfect order.. Other people have commented on other things, so I will bring up just my personal criticism of color. I really appreciate that you have multiple and complex colors in there, blues, purples, etc. A lot of times in painting, we notice that people forget to use these colors for shadow or highlight, and the painting ends up feeling flat.. The pain during sex caused me to go see my doctor and I broke down in her office. She recommended I have it 무주출장마사지 removed and I agreed. She said many women cannot handle Progestin only options and I'm one of them. Deathwing is caught off guard and slaughtered, however Therezane is pissed we forced our way into Deepholm and basically caused the world pillar to break anyways. The final fight in Dragonblight still takes place however its against those huge old God looking tenticle things. Yogg Saron is also present due to given more time to break out of containment in Ulduar since we skipped our trip to Northrend as well as N due to having sped up his plans seeing the eratic and different movement the 무주출장마사지 alliance and horde forces made instead of what he predicted. Took us days to figure out WTAF I eaten that made me a fetal position on the bathroom floor sobbing and begging Spouse to kill me. It was the single scoop of ice cream on my bday brownie. That I shared with Spouse.. Anne was not without a feeble hope that something might come of it after all. But nothing did. John Douglas came and took Janet driving, and walked home from prayer meeting with her, as he had been doing for twenty years, and as he seemed likely to do for twenty years more. The motion failed, with all 52 Republicans voting against it and 48 Democrats voting in favor. The motion to reconsider the vote was agreed to. As expected, that vote failed, with 55 in favor of advancing the nomination and 45 opposing it. And all that design talk aside, height is by far the single most important factor contributing to S1 freefall duration. As Galileo and Newton can tell us, going sideways doesn change the freefall duration at all the only way to make it freefall longer or shorter is to increase or decrease its apogee. So later S1 landing implies higher apogee, which implies more vertical initial trajectory.. Philosophy specifically helps a bit more than other liberal arts degrees. It has the best starting salary averages of any liberal arts degree. I started my comp sci classes while in a philosophy major and it actually helped because of the cross over in logic statements. Hm, I'd still probably flip flop on this all season. I guess ultimate upside pick would be to go another RB because imho both mixon or bell have that talent potential in them to be that tier one back that scores north of 300 points. Potential for an outcome of two of in the range of RB1 RB7 would be a lot of fun and also give you injury protection and the ability to trade either them or hot hand rb waiver wire pickups.

[anthonybialy]

Our Father, Who Art in D.C.

A demented take leads to logical conclusions in their illogical way. Take how government fixing life means needing to elect saviors. Those holding temporary positions must be the ones fate has chosen to dispense blessings. An indifferent structure leads to invasive abuse if enough suckers vote in a special way.

Praising empty shelves as a statement against materialism is a popular hobby amongst those who weren't just looking for any alternate to the previous incumbent. As a reminder they'd like to forget, there were genuine Joe Biden fans who either thought against every bit of evidence he'd succeed. At least, they were tired of their money being valuable. His cultish side's creepy infatuation with hoary statists led to backing a cool grandpa who was going to create prosperous peace. Except for the things, things are super.

Politicians who promise to plan everything sure struggle to make anything swell. Appreciate inflation of war and fear just to make your worthless currency not feel so isolated. Consistency is the worst virtue for elected fiends.

We're blessed with an inspirational underling who will lead us into a joyous future until she talks. Kamala Harris is the vice president, in case you had put her out of mind like Democrats hope. She's doing super as long as she's not expected to talk sensibly. Win a debate by ceding time to her. It's of course racist and sexist to notice someone selected for her race and sex is at best incoherent. The Supreme Court is closer to ruling that observation is unconstitutional.

Democrats filled with hope would be adorable if they weren't inflicting their dreamy nonsense on everyone else. There's a reason they don't try running companies by getting promoted instead of imposing orders on them, and their inherent ineptness naturally means the country suffers instead of just one company.

Forget thinking if your own path thanks to bumbling schemers who want to hassle you in broad visionary terms and also on irksomely specific issues. Bumbling hayseed Jimmy Carter, oily seducer Bill Clinton, and prototypical bullplop salesman Barack Obama are seeing their legacy continue. Career politicians never peddle anything customers actually want.

Trusting humans instead of systems is inevitably foolish when same humans want to warp said systems. State intervention means pushing the USS USA well past its design parameters. An ideological commitment to believing government makes life better is as harmful a notion as it is a practice. The only way to make this curious delusion more unpalatable is to adulate the messianic simpletons in question.

Very substantive political junkies are deeply committed to the image. In a perversely helpful way, two wasted years provided an easy way for dupes to self-identify. Nervous infiltrators want to keep thinking masks kept us safe just like they demand government fritters what you earned on whatever they call infrastructure.

Checking results would damage faith, which is how these sort of morons with these sort of moronic guarantees remain electable. There's all the difference between who can win and whether or not it's a swell notion.

Sadly, we can no longer claim it's one side that's one-sided. Republicans better be moving past the Trump cult unless they like being the other party that invests its faith in a wholly flawed savior. One of the endless regrettable portions of the dedication to worshiping the phoniest strongman was contaminating conservatism with the notion that its goals could be advanced by a single bossy branch.

The technical Republican's endless array of shady tumbling companies were run as poorly as the government while he was executive. Now, we cope with the shameful legacy of semi-bipartisan dedication to believing respective side's prophets are capable of fixing everything with diktats. Faux muscularity distracts from the actual lack of chin-ups.

Decent people should get exemptions. They possess them naturally by what we used to call rights. America needs a leader who notes that Russia sucks as much as muggers. The next president should ideally be only focused on bothering others through international relations, including international parties with whom we want no relations. Protecting against genuine infringements allows us to figure out the rest.

Trust is the true test of authority. The temptation to bully should be resisted by the noble. Kids who were shaving in junior high can choose to either use results of quick growth spurts to harass those who haven't hit their voice changes yet or protect them from goons who do exactly that. The pandemic was a chance to avoid telling those who were scared they needed to undergo solitary confinement. Stress on mental health that didn't protect physical health was the sadly natural result of the urge to intervene.

Don't even trust those who trust you. Anyone who wants your vote is to be treated as suspicious. One who recognizes limitations should still be kept on probation. Be endlessly suspicious of any leader who claims to reluctantly use as little power as possible. The truly wise and decent candidate will understand the Solomonic test. Stop cutting our incomes in half.

[tradcatmaria]

So I noticed twice you have a pink elephant on your laptop, (I was curious how you decorate it) and does that mean you support Republicans? I don't mean to get into a debate, but I'm curious what your logic is considering being Catholic and Republican. Do you think they're the best pick for Catholic views? What about the American Solidarity Party? I'm just trying to hear more opinions concerning Catholics and politics so I hope this isn't too much to ask! Thanks for your time!

Hello!

Yes! I am a registered Republican and I identify as a conservative (although I am technically center-right). 

I do like the American Solidarity Party. They are more centrist than I am used to, but that’s okay. The party platform is rooted in Christian values and I love that so much. I like capitalism, but I recognize the issues with it. I am not familiar with distributism, so I can’t really comment on it (It’s something that I’ll have to read more about). The American Solidarity Party does not have a stance on the Second Amendment. As a gun rights supporter, this is not exactly what I consider ideal, but it’s much better than the alternative.

I would definitely vote for the American Solidarity Party if we didn’t have this two-party system. I vote to advance the common good. It’s hard to do that if the people I am voting for don’t get to actually do anything. I want my vote to count. It feels pointless to stand with a party that doesn’t have a good chance of winning.

What first drew me to the Republican Party is the social conservatism. Since abortion, same-sex “marriage”, assisted suicide, embryonic stem cell research, and human cloning are non-negotiables for Catholics (The five most commonly listed ones), the Democratic Party is automatically ruled out (They are also hostile to traditional Christian morality). We must remember what the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith said: “To vote in favour of a law so harmful to the common good is gravely immoral”. We must not vote for candidates whose positions are harmful to the common good, either.

Neither party is perfect, but one is definitely better on non-negotiable issues than the other. The American Solidarity Party corrects some of the issues that I have found in the GOP, but as I said earlier, I want my vote to count. 

The GOP represents me better than the Democratic Party as a Catholic who wants to remain faithful to the Church because of the way that they protect religious liberty. This is something to consider, too.

These are some of the reasons why I am a registered Republican and have a pink GOP sticker on my laptop :)

I hope this helps! God bless!

Ad Jesum per Mariam,

María de Fátima

[blackfreethinkers]

Donald Trump (Photo by Win McNamee/Getty)

The Washington Post reports that President Donald Trump is asking around if he can pardon his family, aides, and even himself. And so now we follow our increasingly familiar pattern:

Reasonable people: He can’t do that! Law people: It’s not as clear as you think. Deplorables: Of COURSE he can do that! Law people: That’s not what I said… Deplorables: Shut up, nerd. #MAGA. #FifthAvenueShooter #WhitePower! Reasonable people: Congress would… Republicans in Congress: I’m gonna stop you right there. Media: This is a Constitutional crisis… OMG MORE TWEETS PLEASE.

Donald Trump was put on this Earth to teach Americans the difference between “laws” and “norms.” Oh, he’s happy to break both, but when he messes with the norms, we feel particularly confused and impotent.

Let’s try to get a little ahead of the game, this time. Let’s assume Trump pardons himself based on the theory that Trump will always do the worst possible thing he can think of. Moreover, it’s actually more likely that Trump will pardon himself as opposed to his aides. Pardoning his aides would rob them of their Fifth Amendment protections against self-incrimination and, well, that’s bad for Trump. Pardoning himself, to the extent that he can, would mean that Trump would consider himself untouchable, and that’s really the only thing he cares about.

What happens next? What follows is an exhaustive list of possibilities. I can’t say “comprehensive” list because, frankly, I’m not creative enough to imagine all the ways Republicans are willing to destroy this country. I’ve put these in order of what I think is most likely to happen, legally. But, again, my predictive powers are murky because I don’t know what it’s like to live as a Republican.

1. Charges are never filed, nothing happens.

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Contrary to popular belief, you absolutely can pardon someone without charges being filed against them. What you can’t do is prospectively pardon someone for future acts. I can pardon the dog for peeing on the rug, but if I wanted to make it okay for the dog to pee on the rug in the future, I need to change the laws regarding rugs in my house, not give the dog blanket authority to pee where ever she wants.

Pardons attach to past acts, so the simplest result of a presidential self-pardon would be that Trump is never charged for the past acts he pardoned himself for doing. Given that it’s pretty difficult to prosecute a sitting president for anything anyway, and the fact that the investigations have seemed to focus on Trump’s associates more than the president himself, the most likely result would be to not bring charges against Trump while he’s still president.

Nothing happens for the rest of his term, or terms. We’ll get to what might happen when Trump leaves office, later.

2. Charges are filed, everybody ignores the self-pardon.

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Because pardons are attached to acts, the President would have to be pretty specific about what he is pardoning himself for. Given that Trump is stupid and lazy, and the fact that his administration has thus far produced shoddy and incomplete legal work product, I doubt that Trump’s self-pardon would effectively cut off all avenues for prosecution.

I mean, what’s the man gonna say? “I bigly pardon myself for ALL… things… involving Russia”? Okay, boss, well we’re prosecuting for obstructing justice. “I pardon myself for obstructing justice”? Sorry, we’re coming after you for abuse of power. “I pardon… me.” Sorry, you can’t do that. That’s pardoning yourself for things you haven’t done yet.

Politically, Trump is probably not going to be able to say what he is pardoning himself for specifically enough to make that pardon an insurmountable legal hurdle.

If courts wants to ignore the self-pardon, without ruling on whether the president has the power to self-pardon, they can do that with the help of a mildly creative prosecutor.

3. Charges are filed, courts rule on the pardoning power.

I’m not sure that anybody has standing to object to a self-pardon simply because it was issued. But if charges are brought against the president, and the president claims to have pardoned himself for the specific act alleged, then the Supreme Court just might decide to get into it.

I have no idea what the Court would do. On the one hand, these people should have a deep respect for the Constitution. On the other hand, they installed George W. Bush as president and then told us all to forget about it. Could the Supreme Court rule that Trump has the power to pardon himself, with Trump’s handpicked, personal Supreme Court justice, Neil Gorsuch, casting the deciding vote in the president’s favor? Sure. That could happen. Would that be casus belli for war? I say yes (but I’ll return to this later as well).

4. Impeachment… in 2018 perhaps.

It tells you everything you need to know about the weakness of the Republican Party that this option is so low. Constitutionally, the thing that’s supposed to CHECK the executive from abusing, say, his pardon power, is impeachment. Impeachment (and a sense of propriety) is why Obama didn’t pardon every low-level drug offender in the entire federal system before firing up a J while they lifted him up on their shoulders.

You can’t pardon yourself from impeachment. That much is clear. Arguably, many presidents have considered pardoning themselves for various things, and they didn’t because they knew Congress would turn around and impeach them almost immediately.

I don’t think this president fears this Congress. I assume Trump has a Newton’s Cradle made out of the actual testicles of Paul Ryan, Kevin McCarthy, and Steve Scalise. I don’t think there’s any chance this Congress impeaches Trump, no matter what he does. Caligula was having sex with the wives of Roman senators, and they did nothing, and modern Republicans are far weaker than early imperial Roman senators.

But Republicans are not going to be in charge forever, and pardoning yourself while Congress does nothing might just be the kind of thing that causes a “wave election” in 2018. If the president pardons himself, Democrats running in 2018 aren’t just going to be calling for impeachment, they best be calling for stoning if they want to get my vote. I don’t think I’m the only one.

5. Charges are filed after Trump leaves office, the new president decides whether or not to pardon him.

I’m wishcasting a bit with a 2018 takeover. It’s just as likely that Trump serves out his term, wins another one (because white people), and lives long enough to see a total repudiation of the Republican Party in 2024. At which point I fully expect to see old-ass Trump in chains.

Remember, we got pretty close to convincing Barack Obama — a decent, “I’m not here to talk about the past” sort — to prosecute Dick Cheney and George Bush for merely being evil. Which is not really a crime. The minute Trump cedes the powers of his office, in three to seven years, there are going to be A LOT of people who want to see him prosecuted, for ALL OF IT. If Trump admits here in 2017 that he did some dirt in 2016, but pardons himself for it, well that’s just an admission of guilt for the new president to roll up on him when Trump is no longer in power.

If a Republican succeeds Trump, the pressure to prosecute Trump might be even greater. Gerald Ford lost to the damn Planter’s Peanut because he pardoned Nixon. If Trump thinks his self-pardon will carry any legal weight after he’s out of power, he is fooling himself.

6. Military Takeover.

Why would you think that a president who pardons himself wouldn’t also use the military to keep himself in power should he be impeached or otherwise threatened with removal? Were you absent the day they taught “Absolute Power” on the playground? If Congress impeaches Trump, after Trump unsuccessfully pardons himself, his next play is TANKS.

I don’t know if the military would go along with this play. But the fact is that if we’re really dealing with a president who pardons himself, the opinion of Joseph Dunford, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs, suddenly matters. It matters a great deal. The opinion of the generals on who should legally be president probably hasn’t mattered this much since Ulysses S. Grant decided it was okay for Andrew Johnson to succeed Abraham Lincoln.

This is where we are, America.

7. Trump resigns.

Yeah, I’m putting Trump abdication lower than a Trump military takeover, because I’m not fooled into thinking this guy intends to play by your rules.

But, the self-pardon would be an attempt by Trump to make Russia “go away.” Once he realizes that it’s not going to go away, no matter what he says and who he bullies, he just might say “screw it, see you on the links.” He is very impulsive, and very lazy.

Again, I don’t think this is likely because the minute he’s out of power, the law is going to descend on him like he stole something. Which he did! But Trump doesn’t always think ahead so, you never know, he might quit.

8. Bloody Revolution.

The only people weaker than Republicans in Congress are the American people themselves. A leader who admits to potential illegality, but refuses to be subject himself to the laws of men, is not a “president” of a republic, he is a tyrant.

In normal countries inhabited by free men and women of strength and vigor, a self-pardon would be about the point where people went to war. If the president will not subject himself to the law, if the Congress will not hold him accountable to the law, if the courts will not agree that the law can even be applied to the president, then it falls to the people to defend their rights to constitutional government.

Like impeachment, this option really shouldn’t be so low on the list. But we are a fat, weak, decadent people. I don’t believe we have the strength to fight tyranny. We literally can’t even get on the same page to find the strength to fight American Airlines.

A self-pardon is not going shock us to action. Trump shooting people in the streets would not shock us to action. Scroll back to the top: the most likely legal consequence of Trump pardoning himself is… nothing.

We’ll do nothing. Nothing will be done. We don’t have bread and circuses, but nachos and football seem to be all most Americans need out of this government.

[to-learn-of-living]

SPACE WARS!

Episode XLV -  A New Hope?

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...

There are few movie series as iconic as Star Wars. With the original trilogy George Lucus showed the world that science fiction doesn't have to be B grade movies with laughable special 'effects'. He gave us a galaxy full of races, an ancient religion, and well crafted characters to both love and hate.

In the original movie we meet Luke Skywalker, a teenager with a boring life, who joins a group of rebels and goes on adventures after his family are murdered. The movies paint an overly simplistic view of who's good and bad - you’re on the 'light side’ or the ‘dark side'! We know that in A New Hope our rag tag team of rebels are ‘good’ while Darth Vader and his cronies are ‘bad’. It’s that simple.

But real life is never that simple.

When we read up on history, we look through our own lens of understanding. Our literature tells us that the good guy always wins, so we often apply that logic unconsciously onto the past.

Why did the allies win the 2nd world war? Because we had the right ideology and God on our side!

Why did the Europeans defeat the North American natives? Because they had the right ideology and God on their side!

Why is Australia the greatest country on earth? Because our culture is the best, and we were founded on Christian Values.

Now I know not everyone reading this believes in God, and certainly not everyone thinks Australia is the best country on earth (although if you’re honest, I'm willing to bet that in at least some point of your life you truly believed your own country was the greatest). But the same basic idea stands. We are so immersed in our own culture that we assume uncociously that it's the best possible culture. We look at our history and see that we were victorious in our battles, so logically, we are the good guys!

A week ago the majority of my country celebrated Australia day. However, a growing number of people each year refuse to take part, not because they are unpatriotic, but because of the disturbing history behind the day.

26 January marks the arrival of the 'First Fleet' of British settlers to Australian shores. This week I've seen many people posting articles about how Sir Arther Phillip, the first governor of New South Wales, brought Christianity to Australia in the form of Reverend Richard Johnso who ministered to the convicts and settlers. Johnso built the first school only 5 years later! Sir Arther Phillip built infrastructure and started agriculture. It many ways, if it wasn't for Phillip, modern Australia wouldn't exist! Looking at these facts in isolation, it's easy to see why many Australians see the First Fleet as a great moment of our history!

English: The Founding of Australia, 26 January 1788, by Captain Arthur Phillip R.N. Sydney Cove. Original oil sketch [1937] by Algernon Talmage R.A. ML 1222. source: wikimedia

But I’ve also seen many articles on the horrors of the first fleet. Phillip was quite peaceful towards the local Eora Aboriginals, and when he was speared because of a misunderstanding, he ordered his men not to retaliate. However, although not sanctioned by Phillip, many new settlers were outright hostile to the locals from the start. The colonists presence led to the suffering and deaths of many Eora people due to the introduction of smallpox and other diseases that the locals had no immunity to. While this didn't kill everyone, within two generations the Eura people's language, social structure and culture was lost. And that's without going into the brutality of Phillip's successors who orderd full scale irradication of Aboriginal people and/or forcible removal from their tribal land.

We like to paint history with 'heroes' and 'villains', But reality is a lot harder to define than Star Wars. If we look only at the facts, Phillip tried to help people like a Jedi, but his actions caused horrific consequences like a Sith. Don't get me wrong, he probably couldn't comprehend that his actions would lead to the extermination of entire people groups, but that's how history played out. He wasn't a hero or a villain, but exists somewhere in between like all the rest of us regular Joe's.

In Star Wars, like in history, we see a very one sided story. Throughout the series we only see life from the point of view of the republic/rebels/resistance - the 'light side' of the force. It tells a tale of how the galaxy was once a happy place, until an evil Sith manipulates a young Jedi to embrace the dark side and enforce a dictatorship. But let me tell you the story from another point of view.

You live in a galaxy with a so called government, but only one member of each planet can be elected to the senate, and even then only the important planets get any real say in proceedings. The races who own many planets get many seats, while the poor races who share a planet with others may get none.

Crime runs rampant in the outer planets, much like the 'verse of Firefly. Sure there's a galactic police force of amazing space wizards known as Jedi, but there are too few of them to really control the entire galaxy. If you come from an 'unimportant' planet you could wait months for a Jedi to turn up, and even then their roles are so politicised that they may not even be allowed to help you.

Suddenly a member of the senate rises from the ranks. He represents an old marginalised alternate religion. He seizes power and overthrows the old system of government. He implements a proper police force (storm troopers) on every planet. Their methods might be a little harsh, but you can't argue with the results!

Everything’s going well for you for a while, until the terrorists begin their attacks.  No one really takes them seriously, at least not until one cell blows up a space station as big as a moon, containing millions of police, business owners, janitors, cooks, and many others. You had friends murdered in their cowardly attack.

The terrorists get more and more daring until they eventually break into Palpatines’ chamber and murder him in cold blood - at least that's what Jenny heard from her cousins friend... They attempt to start a new government. But successful rebellions usually cause political turmoil. In fact the fall out confirms that you were far better off under the emperor, especially because crime is now running rampant!

Then you hear about a resistance group called ‘The First Order’. They seek to restore the empire like in the good old days. They're even trying to reinstate the police force. Maybe you should encourage your firstborn son Flynn to enlist...

…Ok so it’s a big stretch to forgive all of that murder Darth Vader and Siddious committed, but in a gigantic galaxy there would be very few people who’ve actually met either of them. Their actions would probably turn into urban myths. 'Eat your vegetables dear or Darth Vader will get you'.

source: Google Images

The weird thing about Star Wars, and a lot of stories for that matter, is that we applaud the same behaviour that we despise in real life. We are happy when the Jedi kill people and blow stuff up, because they’re the good guys. But we can’t tolerate that behaviour in the Sith... or any rebellious behaviour from liberals/conservatives/democrats/republicans/Christians/atheists/Muslims/ anyone who is not like us.

‘If I can't see the problem, it doesn't exist. Therefore the other side are just being babies who need to get over themselves!’

For many conservatives, Obama was an evil dictator who created a race problem in America by pandering to each passing fancy of the black community. But to many African-Americans, Obamas presidency was a huge disappointment, and they feel like the systematic racism in America is just as bad now as it was 8 years ago.

To some, Donald Trump a saviour who is restoring goodness and order to America. To others he is akin to hitler, tearing apart the hard won rights of minorities everywhere. Both sides shout at the other ‘you don't understand the facts'.

But just because you can't see a problem, it doesn't mean it’s not real.

I've written before about how our inbuilt biases shape our view of the world, and shared pieces showing reality from both sides. I’ve also written a piece pleading with liberals to not let their fear turn into hate. These are all problems that need to be addressed. But this week I'm far more disappointed in conservative Christians.

Let me be clear, I know the women's march contained fowl language and violence from some members. I know you are scared about the security of your nation. I know you think we should celebrate the arrival of the first fleet. But by complaining about dissenters without trying to understand why they're so upset, you fail to show them the love of Christ.

So what if they're violent/angry/treat you badly. It's Christians who are mandated to live lives of love, not anyone else! Most people only turn to extreme measures when they've given up hope of their problems being resolved any other way.

This week I saw Christians complain that the 'woman's march doesn't represent them’, instead of sitting with hurting women and trying to understand what they're going through. I heard Christians shout at indigenous Australians for being ‘unpatriotic’, instead of validating their hurt and seeking forgiveness for their ansestors atrocities. I saw Christians who have been demanding the government adapt a 'biblical view' on gay marriage and abortion for years, despite there being no direct scripture on those subjects, do a 180 degree turn and say helping refugees is ‘not a biblical issue’. In reality almost every book of the bible talks of taking care of immigrants and/or careing for widows and orphans, and the Holy Family were refugees in Egypt!

Many Christians point to the story of Sodom and Gemorrah as 'proof' that same-sex practices are bad. But read the story again - nowhere in Genesis does God ever say what the sin of those cities was. But God tells us Sodem's sin when he compares Jerusalem to an adulterous spouse in Ezekiel. I'm ashamed to say this could easily have been written to either American or Australian Christians this week.

“Your older sister was Samaria, who lived to the north of you with her daughters; and your younger sister, who lived to the south of you with her daughters, was Sodom. You not only followed their ways and copied their detestable practices, but in all your ways you soon became more depraved than they. As surely as I live, declares the Sovereign Lord, your sister Sodom and her daughters never did what you and your daughters have done.

Now this was the sin of your sister Sodom: She and her daughters were arrogant, overfed and unconcerned; they did not help the poor and needy. They were haughty and did detestable things before me. Therefore I did away with them as you have seen. Samaria did not commit half the sins you did. You have done more detestable things than they, and have made your sisters seem righteous by all these things you have done. Bear your disgrace, for you have furnished some justification for your sisters. Because your sins were more vile than theirs, they appear more righteous than you. So then, be ashamed and bear your disgrace, for you have made your sisters appear righteous.”

Ezekiel 16:46-52 (NIV) - emphases mine

But in the darkness this week, I've seen the love of Christ shine in different ways. Like these lawyers who rushed to airports to provide free legal services to travels detained even though they had legal visas. Like Freemantle in Western Australia, who's council chose to move their Australia Day celebrations in an attempt to include everyone. Like my friends who are pro-life Christians, yet chose to march in solidarity with hurting women, because they wanted to show God's love.

I want to finish by sharing the words of a friend of mine. You can read his whole post here.

"I did not march in protest of anything, I marched to show love, support and compassion with those who feel none. I marched because I wanted my daughter to know that she could participate in a peaceful march like this, without hate or violence, and stand with those who hurt. We don’t have to share peoples convictions, beliefs or lifestyle, but it doesn’t mean that we, the church, shouldn’t be in the same spaces that these people are in, standing side by side with people who don’t look like us, act like us, talk like us or believe like us. In fact, those are the places we need to be.

The event was beautiful and heartbreaking at the same time. There were signs of hope, raised beside signs of hatred and anger. There were people cheering and full of joy, standing beside others who were hopeless and tearing others down. There were things that I was proud for my daughter to see, and things that I wish she never had to see, or see again. There were people booing Trump for his policies, asking for a better America, and highlighting their conviction of pro choice over pro life. It was a beautiful mix of love and hate that Jesus was right in the middle of, and that my daughter and I were in the middle of as well."