#but it just comes out as the automatic response

[allmightstoehair]

﹒Haikyuu!! Boyfriend + yachi headcanons pt. 2 !⟡﹒- heyy……

characters: Tobio Kageyama, Tadashi Yamaguchi, Bokuto Kotaro, Sugawara Koushi, Kuroo Tetsuro, Yachi Hitoka (1 aged-up headcanons for all of them) beware!

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Tobio Kageyama

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!tobio who at the start of your relationship, has no idea how to act—like, does he need to adjust his entire personality now?? he overthinks every interaction, silently panicking before realizing he just needs to be himself.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!tobio who expresses love through simple practicality. “Did you eat? Drink water? Stretch properly?” —not because he’s overbearing, but because caring about you is natural to him when it comes to practicing with you. volleyball, i mean.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!tobio who doesn’t get flirting, but when he compliments you, its so unintentionally heart stopping. “You look good today, but then again you always look good. You look better,” he’ll say. sometimes you aren’t sure how to take it but you laugh and kiss him on the cheek in response so he must be doing something right.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!tobio who leans into touch more now with you than ever. he’s experienced your full love, and now he never wants to be without it.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!tobio who when learning to be affectionate, asks seriously, “Did I do it right?” after kissing you for the first time—like its a skill that needs feedback rather than instinct.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!tobio who when resting next to you, subconsciously matches your breathing, falling into your rhythm without realizing how deeply it shows his attachment.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!tobio who randomly catches himself looking at you, staring even. and when you notice—he just blinks at you instead of looking away. he mutters—“You’re really pretty,” like it’s just a fact he’s stating.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!tobio who gets frustrated when his body isn’t cooperating with him and he gets sick —“I’m wasting time. I should be practicing. “—but when you brush his hair back and whisper, “You need to rest, Tobio.” his entire demeanor softens immediately.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!tobio who when you grab his collar in playful annoyance, his brain short circuts. his lips part, as if they’re ready for you to lean in and kiss him already.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!tobio who if he walks away during a heated argument, it’s never out of apathy. never out of just abandoning you because he’s upset—but because he doesn’t know how to process everything at once, because he needs space before saying something he’ll regret. he’s done it in the past with friends, but he wont let himself do it with you.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!tobio who if you hold his hand, lean on him, or steal his hoodie, he gets all stiff for a second like his system is rebooting—but after the initial shock, he softens instantly.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!tobio who finds you incredibly mesmerizing when you're fully in the zone—whether it's reading, drawing, or working on something. His stare is intense, but it’s full of admiration. If you catch him looking, he’ll immediately pretend he wasn’t. (Terrible liar, by the way.)

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!tobio who is gentle with you for your first time. he does have a lil freaky freak side 😈. likes to cover your mouth while he fucks you from behind, albeit slowly, letting you hear the dirty noises both of your heats make, then he’ll lean in and kiss your cheek, whispering nothing but sweets in your ear. it makes you melt every single time.

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Tadashi Yamaguchi

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!yama who grabs your fingers and traces them when your other hand is buys writing notes for a big test coming up that you needed to study for.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!yama who laughs loudly at your jokes even if they’re bad. like, full—hearted, genuine laughter. he thinks you’re hilarious and that its fascinating the things you come up with.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!yama who is your biggest fan. literally. whatever passion, hobby, or interest you have, he automatically asks a million questions about it. he loves when you ramble and it gets him excited when you’re excited, so it’s a mutual exchange. sometimes he’ll get side tracked, and just likes to look at your lips when you talk. ‘yeahp. yeah. so..interesting. god, fuck I wanna kiss you so bad.’ he’ll think to himself.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!yama who loves those sleepy, groggy conversations with you over the phone when you’re overtly tired.

﹒⪩⪨ (aged-up) boyfriend!yama who is into pet play. 😈

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!yama who lays in between your thighs like he’s in heaven. “man, am I at the pearly gates or what?” he’ll joke. it made you laugh so hard he himself giggled. he’s obsessed with them. always finding ways to be near them when you guys are alone.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!yama who texts you the dumbest updates ever. at any time of the day. “I think Tsukki’s mad at me, I tripped, bumped into him and made him drop his dinosaur shaped ice cream. send reinforcements😕!” you giggle at his text, like you can hear him saying these exact words, picture his exact expression.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!yama who winces ever so slightly when you raise your voice at him during argument, but never cries. he just hates when you raise your voice but understands you’re trying to get a point across.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!yama who gets so frustrated with you when you don’t open up to him. he’s here. “Oh, for god’s sake just talk to me, Y/N!” he’ll plead, but with no success.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!yama who asks you to try and practice volleyball with him. (if you play) “You’re so good, awesome, amazing even, come on,” he says as he leads you outside your home, buttering you up so you don’t say no.

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Bokuto Kotaro

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!bokuto who is incapable of hiding his excitement when he sees you. expect wild hand waves and dramatic squeals. “BABEE!!!” greetings with a bunch of kisses to your nose and cheeks.

 ﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!bokuto who randomly goes soft mid-chaos. one second he’s goofing off, telling you meaningless things, the next he’s leaning his head to the side with a “..Man, I love you so much.”

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!bokuto who loves play-fighting but sucks at holding his own strength back. sometimes he’ll literally lay on you and you have to hit him seriously for him to get off.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!bokuto who sings while doing household chores. and in the shower? it’s like ariana grande shit in your ears. it’s bad.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!bokuto who considers grocery shopping a date. he gets way too invested in picking the best snacks. “OKAY. WHO CAN GET THE BEST CRUNCHY SNACK FIRST. READY. GO.” and you guys are off running to different isles while getting weird stares.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!bokuto who refuses to let you carry things he deems heavy. he swoops in and grabs it whenever you try. “Babe, it’s just a bag of flour—“ “IT’S TOO HEAVY.”

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!bokuto who steals bites of your food without shame and gives you kisses right aftewards to makeup for it.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!bokuto who tries to teach you volleyball but often forgets how beginning people learn. he speaks too fast and waves his arms back and forth while explaining certain things.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!bokuto who physically can’t handle seeing you cry. it’s not a good strain on his chest and he always massages it gently and sighs. he pulls you into tight hugs, knowing the pressure helps your synthetic nervous system relax.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!bokuto who you introduced to ‘Paramore’ and he’s officially obsessed.

﹒⪩⪨ (aged-up)boyfriend!bokuto who loves when you dig your nails in his back when he’s fucking you. sure, it’s sore when he’s done and the adrenaline wears off, but it just feels so good.

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Sugawara Koushi

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!suga who was starstruck from the first moment he saw you. he couldn’t believe how someone could be so radiant and beautiful. as cliche as it sounds, it was love at first sight.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!suga who when he’s jealous, you can barely tell. he’ll just brush it off and smile because he reassures himself that you’re his. he trusts you with his heart and knows you won’t break it.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!suga who wraps his arm around your waist from behind when you’re in the kitchen, or standing up doing something. he won’t let go until he’s gotten a few kisses in return.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!suga who calls you ‘lovely’ or ‘love’ it’s a simple name, but uniquely his for you. “What’s wrong, love?” he’ll coo if he sees you having a rough day or “‘Course, lovely,” he says with a big grin when you ask him if you can watch his practices.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!suga who tutors with kisses. he’s very aware you have a mildly short attention span, so he likes to kiss you to keep you engaged. “Now, if you get this right,—“ he points to the paper, tapping his finger up and down. “You get a kiss. Get it wrong, I pinch ya.” you groan, but never get an answer wrong when you start.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!suga who asks Daichi for help on things to do for you on your birthday like he has more experience than him.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!suga who doesn’t get along with his parents. they’re tough people, so they tell him he’s ‘too soft’ or ‘too feminine’ which really works him up. he runs to you for guidance and comfort.

﹒⪩⪨(aged-up) boyfriend!suga who is very into bondage and tying you up. he’ll also gag you on occasion, telling you to use your pretty noises to indicate what you want. he loves to use baby pink ribbons to tie your wrists together to the headboard so it’s easy to fuck you in either position—doggy or missionary—which he adores both.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!suga who brings you baskets of your favorite things when you tell him that you’re on your period. he’s done his research and even asks you what you like so when it’s that time of the month, he goes out and buys those things to bring them to you. he’ll skip practice if he has to just to be with you and comfort and hold you.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!suga who even if you guys have been together for more a while, gets shy with an unprecedented kiss on the lips in front of other students. especially his teammates because he knows they’ll tease him about it later during practice.

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Kuroo Tetsuro

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!kuroo who started off as an academic rival. you two would compete in all of your classes that you had together, giving mean glances when the other got higher on a test, cliche stuff like that.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!kuroo who gets way too invested in dumb conversations when he’s bored. And he fights like he’s an attorney trying to win a trial. “A pizza isn’t a pizza with fruit on it, Y/N. Pineapple is a fruit. Therefore you don’t like pineapple on your pizza. That’s just a blob of shit—“

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!kuroo who has a habit of fixing you up or providing acts of service. If your tie is messy he’ll pull you in aggressively and fix it for you, or if strands of hair are annoying you, he’ll pull a clip out of nowhere and clip it back. phone battery low? look no further. he’s got a charger and WILL find a port for it.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!kuroo who plays those ‘Guess my Chapstick’ games with you but ends up eating your face. not—literally but he kisses you endlessly like there’s no tomorrow.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!kuroo who rambles when he’s nervous. you don’t see it often, but if he’s trying to mentally prepare for a game, he’ll talk your ear off, switching topics at the speed of light. it’s a moment where he’s not so tacky with his teasing—a moment of vulnerability.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!kuroo who hoovers you about doing your homework. “Stop procrastinating and get it done or no kisses for a day.” he’ll tell you. “A day? Psh. I can handle that” “A week.” “FINE OKAY.”

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!kuroo who talks about his pet goldfish he used to own like he’s a dead relative. his name was Ponyo, and he’s very dramatic when he tells the story of how Ponyo was dead on the floor when he came back from school one afternoon. He jumped out of the tank.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!kuroo who loves to slow dance in convenience stores when theres romantic music playing. he doesn’t give a shit who’s watching. he’s pulling you into a lazy twirl away from your shopping cart. “Just humor me,” he’ll say cheekily.

﹒⪩⪨ (aged-up)boyfriend!kuroo who gets turned on seeing you wear his clothes for the first time. he’ll caress your waist, soft over the large shirt you have on and bite his lip a little, holding back a groan. He’ll grab a handful of your hair while he’s plowing into you from behind. “Y/N, you look so good getting—mm—fucked with my shirt on.” he moan softly while his free hand slaps your ass.

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!kuroo who fills silence with dumb hypotheticals. “What if we switched bodies for a day,” he asked you one day during a dinner date when you both ran out of things to talk about. or that one time at lunch when he asked, “Would you still love me if I had a handlebar mustache?” (why is he like this)

﹒⪩⪨ boyfriend!kuroo whose first instinct in small arguments is to joke, defuse tension with a smirk—but the moment he sees frustration flicker in your eyes, his grin fades, his expression sharpens, and he quietly says “Alright. Let’s talk.” and he’ll sit you down and talk with you

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Yachi Hitoka

﹒⪩⪨ girlfriend!yachi who is flustered towards every single romantic gesture you throw her way. just a tuck of hair behind her ears and she squeaks quietly under her breath. she knows she loves you, but sometimes her brain just short-circuits over the fact that you love her too.

﹒⪩⪨ girlfriend!yachi who accidentally gets possesive over you. if a player from the team, or even some random eyeballs you for too long, she catches herself glaring a little. when you tease her, she’ll deny it. “WHAT? NO I WASN’T THATS—okay maybe a little..but they shouldn’t be staring at my beautiful Y/N!”

﹒⪩⪨ girlfriend!yachi who struggles with compliments even though she makes them so effortlessly. “Gorgeous? Me? Whaaa—don’t be such a sweet talker I’m not all that,” she’s wave her hand and brush it off.

﹒⪩⪨ girlfriend!yachi who worries about her presence bothering you. her thumbs will hover over the keyboard after her second text was sent, wondering if she should add more. “Maybe I’m bothering them..” she’ll mumble to herself as she shuts off her phone.

﹒⪩⪨ (aged-up)girlfriend!yachi who is a whimpering mess when you eat her out. with your arms wrapped around her thighs—trapping her from escaping—she whines, complaining(?) and moaning continously. “Ohh,fuck, Y/N! Mnff! H—hah you’re so…ughh—damn itt!!” her fingers claw at the sheets, trying to collect purchase foe support.

﹒⪩⪨ girlfriend!yachi who takes pictures of everything to save and show you later. flowers? saved. another fight between Kageyama and Hinata? saved. weird posters in the club rooms? saved.

﹒⪩⪨ girlfriend!yachi who murmurs soft confessions while you’re cuddling. an “I love you so much,” or “You’re awesome..” will slip past her lips before she dozes off into the comfort of your arms.

﹒⪩⪨ girlfriend!yachi who can’t handle spicy food but she knows you love it so she’s constantly getting you those spicy chips you like, or buying you spicy ramen.

﹒⪩⪨ girlfriend!yachi who gets so nervous during serious conversations, but she takes deep breaths and makes sure you know she’s listening because she knows communication is important to you and your relationship.

(oh. my, god, i love yachi.)

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

I admit I'm curious, do you sometimes take a long time to answer questions? How come your answers are so detailed and great, if you sometimes take a long time to research certain topics? I wonder if you still have questions from months ago that you haven't answered yet? And you answer so many answers a day and many of them are very detailed.

It depends on what the ask is?

I of course get asks requesting lore compilations, to analyze scenes or characters, or to explain certain things, which are what take the most time to research and write. I can write multiple drafts or go back to edit the post several times. In some cases, I automatically know the answer (due to how much of the Twst lore I’ve hyperfixated on), happen to have irl background knowledge on a topic that can help, have a friend who knows, can give a quick or simple response to a quick or simples question, or have already answered a similar ask and can just link back to it. It helps a lot that I’ve been in the fandom since Twst first launched in March 2020 (so I’ve experienced a ton and have had the time to marinate in it).

I also get plenty of asks that don’t require a ton of brain power, like people wanting for my opinion, discussing their own thoughts and ideas, or just being silly. It’s not all seriousness and calculations here!

Part of it is also just the illusion of frequent activity 😭 It may look like I’m responding to 3-6 asks every day, but I’m NOT actually writing most of those responses the very same day they go live. In some cases, it could take me a few days to several weeks to put out my reply to an ask.

I don’t know if this is uncommon knowledge or not, but Tumblr has a queue function which allows you to make posts and schedule them to automatically go up at a later date and time. I use this function a lot, it’s a godsend!! And there can be anywhere from 30 to 90 asks queued at any given moment! If I happen to find a sliver of free time in my day, I just chip away at asks and slap them into the queue so there’s always some activity to look forward to while we wait for the next major update ^^

I do have asks from months ago (heck, even years ago) I haven’t answered, but it’s mostly because it’s not feasible for one person to respond to hundreds and hundreds of asks. Some of them are no longer relevant, don’t warrant responses, violate blog rules, or I just have no interest in answering. I have the ability to pick and choose what catches my fancy to bring to the public to discuss.

[inspireland]

I do think you're projecting a lot, which is why you're interpreting Usopp's point of view pretty correctly but completely misinterpreting the rest of the crew's, especially Luffy's. That's such a character assassination.

You're ignoring that more than the emotional labor regarding the upkeep of the Merry, the point of that falling through is the culmination of Usopp's insecurities, which none of the members pushed onto him--on the contrary.

Usopp tends to think very lowly of himself because of the life he's led (understandable), and thus he has never really trusted his place in the crew, despite all the other members validating it again and again. He projected his situation on Merry's, despite being two very different scenarios, because Merry was the only real contribution he felt he brought to the crew, and thus automatically negatively interpreted the need to get a new ship as the crew being okay with throwing away a member of the family.

The way Luffy approached breaking the news wasn't the best, but it was clearly done out of care for Usopp. He and the crew knew that Usopp would react badly no matter what, and in being told that the Merry could no longer sail because it was too damaged, he'd blame himself and his lacking skills when taking care of her, so Luffy tried to minimize the damage by acting like a captain and making it seem as simply his decision to change ship, not fault of Usopp's. He tried to take on the burden.

That didn't work because here we have the other issue explored: we see the culmination of Usopp (and other members a bit as well, but especially him) not taking the captain role and the crew as seriously as needed. Naively, to him the crew are simply his friends, but while they are friends, a family, the place they occupy in the world they live in is that of a pirate crew and Luffy is the captain.

Zoro clearly spells the issue out when stopping Luffy from accepting Usopp back without Usopp apologizing and asking to be let back in the crew. They may be chasing adventures, but they're not playing at being pirates. They ARE pirates. That comes with certain dynamics and responsibilities in certain situations, which Usopp "I'm the captain" tended to ignore. Yes, "I'm the captain" is a joke to him, but it's also a symptom of him not taking the role seriously. He's been going against the already rare captain orders a bit by that point, the fight with Luffy is just the culmination.

That fight HAD to happen, and he HAD to be defeated by Luffy specifically in order to grow as an individual and crew member. It was also needed because Usopp had to stand up for himself, even though he was in the wrong, and that was an important step for his self-esteem as it forced him out of his self-imposed shell.

It's also weird to find issue with the boys marching to beat up the Franky Family when the importance of Usopp's honor and pride is such a big theme in that part of the story.

More than in body, Usopp had been greatly wounded inside.

The boys know him, hence why they go to avenge him. Making it seem like it was a purely selfish choice is, once again, purposefully negatively interpreting the crew members' intentions. I mean, this show works best on symbolism and impactful actions more than on realism, so a scene of the doctor treating the patient wasn't necessary, while the march on the Franky Family was needed to further deliver how in high regard the crew deems Usopp's honor. Unfortunately, Usopp was unconscious and did not witness the high regard and care the crew has for him--it might've calmed down some of his insecurities.

I've spent the last 45 minutes crying because relationship emotional labor imbalance struggles, but that's not what is important here. What's important is it made me realize EXACTLY WHY I GET SO UPSET EVERYTIME I THINK OF THE WATER SEVEN USOPP STUFF. THE DUDE WAS DOING THE MENTAL AND EMOTIONAL LABOR OF THE CREW, AND 'HOUSE UPKEEP/MAINTENANCE' AND HE THOUGHT EVERYONE WAS FINALLY ON THE SAME PAGE ABOUT THE SHIP, AND THEN HE TRIES TO EXPRESS EMOTIONAL AND PHYSICAL SAFETY NEEDS ABOUT THE MONEY, GETS DISMISSED, GETS BEAT UP, VEIWS IT AS HIS FAULT AND RESPONSIBILITY BECAUSE HE WAS BASICALLY TOLD AND SHOWN THAT THROUGH LACK OF SUPPORT AND SAFETY, TRIES TO DEAL WITH IT, GETS BEAT HALF TO DEATH AGAIN, AND THEN WAKES UP WITH PPL WHO HAVE ALREADY HAD TIME TO PROCESS AND BE UPSET, GET MAD AT HIM FOR NEEDING TO PROCESS AND BEING UPSET. HE LOOKS FOR SUPPORT AND INFO, IS REJECTED, AND EXPECTED TO ACCEPT THAT THE HOME HE TRIED TO MAINTAIN FOR HIS FAMILY IS JUST GOING TO BE REPLACED WITH A NEW ONE. HE PUT IN THE MENTAL AND EMOTIONAL LABOR FOR THEIR HOME AND ORGANIZATIONAL/EMOTIONAL NEEDS, DIDNT HAVE HIS MET BECAUSE THEY WERE SHRUGGED OFF AND NOT UNDERSTOOD, FINALLY FELT HOPE, AND THEN HAD THE RUG PULLED OUT. THEY DIDNT EVEN PRIORITIZE HIS WELLBEING WHEN HE WAS HALF DEAD. THEY PRIORITIZED THEIR EMOTIONS AND PRIDE WHEN THEY WENT 'he's still breathing' AND THEN RVEN THE DOCTOR??! WENT TO BEAT THE PPL UP BEFORE TAKING CARE OF HIM?AND JUST COMPLETELY DIDNT EVEN NOTICE OR ACKNOWLEDGE THE WORK HE DID/DOES. HE WAS UPSET THINKING THE REASON THEY WERE GETTING A NEW ONE WAS HIS FAULT AND HE WAS TOLD 'i don't care that you lost the money' AS IF HE DIDNT JUST PUT HIS LIFE ON THE LINE. AND HES JUST EXPECTED TO BE COOL WITH IT IMMEDIATELY?? PEOPLE IMMEDIATELY REDIRECT TO THEIR OWN EMOTIONS AND GET DEFENSIVE INSTEAD OF ADDRESING HIS? THAT IS LIKE TEXTBOOK MENTAL/EMOTIONAL LABOUR IMBALANCE SOCIAL PATTERNS. LIKE WHAT?? THE ONLY ONE THAT SEEMS TO GET IT IS SANJI (thank God that he did). Am I just fully projecting?? Am I crazy here?? I feel like that's part of what happened and definitely part of what had/still has me redlining mad about it. Like he fixed that ship for months, advocated for it and tried to remind and keep mental track of finance priorities regarding the ship, and other people's emotions. Anticipated their needs, mediated arguments, comforted them, tried to keep them mentally aware of consequences and safety, he was doing the invisible work. And I genuinely don't think a lot of them saw and understood the full extent. Ugh I always feel so mad on usopps behalf.

[babybluesquid]

I strongly relate to Murderbot because I too have a buffer that automatically kicks in during conversations sometimes when I’m having trouble thinking of what to say next or am mentally attending to other concerns and says things I don’t mean.

[revvethasmythh]

tbh, one of the things I can't wait to be over with this campaign is the idea that any real person's engagement with feminism is somehow tethered to whether or not/how much they like imogen and laudna (and additionally, having the concept of lesbophobia attached to whether you enjoy the ship between them). i feel like every single time there's been a word of criticism about their behavior or development, it's immediately been met with a cry (in certain circles) that anyone being critical isn't feminist and doesn't support sapphic relationships, which has been a WILD experience on my end as a stan blog for a female character who has notable sapphic ships. but none of that has mattered in the wake of these two SPECIFIC characters. like they're the linchpins of feminism and all sapphics around the world, and to dislike or even just be mildly critical of them proves you have disavowed your rights to be a feminist. or queer yourself. if i am eager for ANYTHING to be over, it is that

[grape-jucie-dog]

Some context in this post

Anyways Athena being a menace is funny and we need more of it

Aphrodite: We should do more sleepovers! This is so fun!

Artemis: We're gods. We don't need sleep.

Aph: It is fun though! It's nice when we aren't at each other's throats.

Hermes: And we get some fabulous sleepwear from our beloved older sister!

Athena: -from afar- Don't get used to it.

Ares: -walking out in a onesie-

Aph: Aww! You look so cute!

Artemis: ... A one piece?

Ares: Hey, I'm allowed to be comfortable. I can't always be the angry guy.

Apollo: Nice onesie, does it come in mens?

Athena: -walking in a matching onesie- Apollo, you come in men enough for everyone in this room. I don't want to hear it.

Hermes: AHAHAHAH—

Aph: HELP? ATHENA?

Artemis: -jaw drop-

Ares: -did NOT expect her to say that-

Athena: -has only just realized what she said, and is absolutely mortified-

Apollo: -does not care, he finds it absolutely hilarious-

[aleenya]

hot take. masking can be good actually.

[bpdpenguin]

they never bring up that “it moved but it didn’t change” is a mirror to “you can mess up even if you stand still”...

[evilkitten3]

at some point the autistic community is going to have to come to terms with the fact that, if you know you're bad with tone and sarcasm, it's still on you if you automatically jump to the worst interpretation you can imagine of what someone's saying. sometimes you actually are just being an asshole

Still can't get over the fact that Toby Fox dreamed up a game ending, but he decided he wanted to make something a little less ambitious first, so instead he made the most influential indie game of all time

[insanechayne]

~ ~ ~

[rodrickheffley]

figuring out that i can, when questioned why i acted a certain way (criticism) and have responded quickly and defensively with some reasoning that in my mind makes sense, realize thats not actually true and correct myself and its fine

[tittyinfinity]

Neighbors on my block & neighbors on my friend's block have decided to make free-roaming dogs a thing.

My friend's next door neighbors don't have a fence and they don't tie their dog up. He's a medium-sized mutt. My friend can't take her dogs outside without this dog rushing up and jumping on them. She can't take her 3 year old outside at all. Quote her neighbors, "Oh, he's friendly!" My poor friend is too nice to stand up to it; I've offered to step in but she doesn't want the drama. Any time I drive to her house, the dog is just walking around the block, digging & shitting in people's yards, absolutely zero regard for what this dog is getting up to.

Like how can you look at your dog pouncing on someone, freaking out their dog and their kid, and go "oh, it's okay if he jumps on you with his sharp-ass claws because he's friendly" ????????

Now, my neighbors here on my block have two huge dogs, a black lab and a golden retriever. I saw them roaming around in yards together and decided to stop to see if I could rescue them. They started digging under a neighbor's fence. Then I heard whistling from a few houses down – the neighbors calling the dogs to come back. They did run back to their owners, but they went right back to letting them go wherever they wanted. (These are the same neighbors that will park multiple trucks in the middle of our narrow road, blocking it to where you have to drive around the block the other way to get around them, and they're well known scammers with horrible reviews on the company they own. So it doesn't surprise me at all that they don't give a shit. Everyone on our block talks about how much they can't stand them.)

Like, it's already dumb enough to let your cats free roam outside when there's god damn roadkill all over the place, but fucking DOGS? We're not in the country! We're in the fucking city! WE'RE NEXT TO AN EXPRESSWAY AND A HIGHWAY!

Just fuck anyone who has small children, huh? They can't go outside if dogs are jumping on them. What about people's cats? The stray cats in the neighborhood? Are the dogs just gonna leave them alone? And then people's yards & gardens too! Digging under fences, digging up flowerbeds, leaving holes in the yard that our elderly neighbors could trip on....

How could you not care????

[mssishipi]

wet the bed — sjy

— soft people fucks the loudest.

content tags: established relationship, sub!jake&reader, jay cameo, explicit content (smut) unprotected sex, multiple sex position: 69, doggy style, mating press. squirting, overstimulation. lots of whining and moaning, they fuck like rabbits :) MDNI. WC:2.4k

note: this is a request from an anon, hope u like it!

Who the fuck decided that two soft, submissive people in bed are automatically boring?

"Too vanilla," they say with wrinkled noses and half-laughs, like they know what happens when the lights go out.

You and Jake have been together for nearly five years—since the final months of high school, when you stumbled into something that felt a little too gentle to be real, too safe to be intense. Most people around you just don’t get it. They whisper that your relationship is sweet, sure, but stale. Predictable. Lifeless, even.

But they don’t know a damn thing.

They don’t know that you and Jake don’t need dominance or power games to melt each other down into quivering pieces. You don’t play roles. You don’t lead or follow.  You move, he moves. You're both responsive, both hungry, both gentle in ways that burn just as deep. It’s not about who takes control—it's about how far you’re both willing to unravel for each other.

If those assholes could see what actually happens behind closed doors, they'd choke on their smug assumptions. 

"Nghh—baby..." Jake's voice is slurred, barely even speech anymore. His face is buried between your legs, the heat of his breath searing against you, tongue dragging slow as he works you over.

 And fuck, you are gone, head thrown back, hips twitching, thighs trembling around his ears.

The only soundtrack is the obscene wetness of his mouth on you, your choked moans, and the blaring growl of an electric guitar seeping through the wall, his room mate, Jay’s latest desperate attempt to drown out the symphony of you and Jake destroying each other.

It doesn’t work.

Your ears are ringing. Your vision blurs every time your spine arches off the mattress. Your legs are shaking so hard they barely stay hooked around his shoulders. Your body is covered in bruises and teeth marks. Jake’s arms are clawed raw, red streaks down to his elbows from where you grabbed and dug in, helpless under the waves he pulled from you again and again and again.

You’ve lost count of how many times he’s made you come, how many times you’ve done the same to him. It's a haze. A loop. An exchange of pleasure until your bones feel hollow.

You barely catch your breath before his fingers are inside you again, curling just right, his mouth crashing into yours, swallowing your moans as you clench around him and cum hard enough to see stars. Your hand slips between you, wrapping around him, stroking with messy urgency until he gasps into your mouth and spills across your stomach. 

Then comes the slow grind of hips in missionary, Jake above you, eyes glassy, sweat dripping down his temple. He pushes in deep, moaning into your throat while you clutch at his back, legs locked around his waist, and both of you fall together again. 

Vanilla, their ass.

The aftershocks haven’t even stopped vibrating through your bones when Jake rolls off of you, chest heaving, lips parted. He sprawls across the sheets, flushed and trembling.

Without a word, you swing a leg over him, straddling his face. He groans like a man starved as your thighs settle against the sides of his head, and your gaze lowers to his cock. thick, flushed, and still rock hard despite having cum four fucking times already.

You lean down, tongue flicking out to tease the head, your breath warm over his slick skin. His hips twitch instantly, a soft, choked whine escaping from under you.

“F-fuck,” he gasps, voice muffled between your thighs.

You take him into your mouth slowly, savoring the weight of him,  the way his whole body tenses beneath you. At the same time, you feel his tongue drag through your folds.

You moan around his cock, the vibration making him jerk. You grind back against his mouth, and he groans right into your cunt, tongue sliding in and curling upward. He hardens it, fucking you with it, slow and deep, as your hips begin to roll.

It’s a filthy rhythm—your mouth stretching around him, sucking harder, faster, your spit dripping down his shaft while he licks and licks and licks, tongue relentless, hands gripping your ass as he pulls you tighter against his face. Your thighs clamp down on instinct, not letting him breathe, not letting him stop.

You feel the familiar pulse in your core and the slight twitch of his cock against your tongue, he’s close, again. You squeeze him tighter with your lips, hollow your cheeks, and the sound he makes is damn near ruined. His whine hits a high pitch, hips jerking once, twice and then he spills into your mouth. You swallow it greedily.

Jake latches onto your clit now, sucking, and you are barely holding on, every nerve burning. Your whole body is tensed, arms braced against his thighs, cunt pulsing uncontrollably around his tongue. Your thighs clamp even tighter, grinding down until he can’t even moan, just hums and licks and loses himself.

Jake loves it—loves how wet you get, how you suffocate him with your thighs like it’s nothing, how your pussy clenches around his tongue. He loves the little tremble in your legs, the broken cries you try to stifle, the taste of your arousal dripping down his chin.

"Jake, fuck! I'm gonna cum!" you squeal, your voice shaking, one hand fisting around his softening cock, feeling it twitch, swell, harden again.

Your hips grind down one last time, helpless, chasing that final drag of his tongue as your orgasm hits. You cry out, body shaking above him, pussy spasming around his mouth. Your forehead presses to his thigh, gasping, and you barely manage to keep sucking him as your world shatters again.

Jake lets out a high whine, hips twitching upward into your mouth. He’s still so fucking hard, again. You can feel it, thick and throbbing between your lips.

He moves again as another orgasm crashes into the both of you.

Another orgasm.

And another.

And another.

You lose count. Time folds. The two of you are always going at it like rabbits, bodies slick and tangled, pleasure drawn out like it might never end. At some point you’re flat on your back again, back arched off the wet bed, sheets soaked with sweat and everything else, Jake’s mouth between your legs for what feels like the hundredth time.

You’re delirious, you feel like you are floating.

He pulls back, lips shiny, chin drenched. You barely get the chance to breathe before he’s kneeling between your thighs, jerking himself off with quick, rough strokes. His eyes are locked on your chest, on the rise and fall of your breath, on your wrecked body twitching with aftershocks. He grits his teeth, then pulls his cock free, aiming it at you.

You're hypnotized.

By the way it twitches. By the way his jaw clenches. By the way his abs tighten and he throws his head back with a broken moan as hot ropes of cum spill across your chest, painting your skin with another climax that somehow hits just as hard as the first.

And still, he's not done.

Jake leans forward, one hand smearing the mess across your breasts, mouth crashing into yours with wild hunger. His cock presses against your thigh, still hard and leaking.

"You want more?" he pants against your lips, voice hoarse, almost disbelieving at how far you both keep falling.

You nod, eyes wide, lips parted. Jake flips you over in one smooth motion, pushing you onto your hands and knees, body trembling beneath him. His hands grip your hips, pushing inside again, deep, slow, a stretch that feels impossibly full despite how soaked you are.

You both moan at once. And then he starts to move, hips snapping into you, the slap of skin-on-skin echoing through the room, drowning out even Jay’s music, which is now thundering through the walls in one last futile attempt to ignore what’s happening just a few feet away.

“Ahh, fuck, Jake, baby!” you cry out, fingers clawing at the twisted sheets as the rhythm builds.

Jake groans behind you, bracing himself with both hands on yours, pinning you to the mattress as he drives deeper, rougher. You love this position—God, how you love it. He finds every spot, angles his hips just right until you’re gasping, sobbing into the mattress.

“We’re so fucking good together,” Jake pants into your ear, his voice shaking with need, “Fuck.” His lips find your neck, kissing everywhere he can reach, hot, sloppy, open-mouthed, desperate to mark.

You tilt your head back blindly, catching his mouth in a messy kiss over your shoulder, tongues tangling, moans swallowed between breathless gasps as he starts to thrust harder, deeper, your bodies slamming together.

You’re clenching around him so hard, you can feel every ridge, every twitch of his cock. The orgasm hits, your breath catching, head lolling forward as heat floods you from the inside out. "Fuck!"

Jake keeps going through it, keeps thrusting through your high, refusing it to end. Your hips instinctively push back against him, your eyes roll back, jaw slack, pleasure crackling through every nerve.

“F-fuck, I—shit,” Jake chokes out, repositioning behind you with a sharp slap to your ass that makes your whole body jolt. He watches it jiggle with a low groan, hips snapping forward again and again. Every thrust knocks the breath from your lungs, and your arms finally give out.

You collapse forward, face buried in the soaked mattress, drool slipping from the corner of your mouth, your body slack and trembling. Completely, utterly fucked out.

“B-b-baby,” Jake stammers, leaning over you again, his chest slick and warm against your back.

You feel his arms slide beneath you, one curling tightly around your waist, the other slipping under your body to knead your breast in slow, circular motions. He’s still thrusting, slower now, but no less intense. You feel every inch, every grind of his hips, his cock dragging against your overstimulated walls as he pants against your ear.

“You can take another one for me?” he whines, voice cracking into a whisper. “P-please? Pretty—pretty please?” 

You moan weakly, unable to find words, only nodding as your fingers twitch into the sheets. You’re half-asleep, fucked so deep into the mattress your limbs barely move but Jake’s still moving, still inside you.

“Don’t s-sleep, nghh, baby, fuck,” he breathes, nuzzling into your nape, teeth grazing the sweat-slick skin there before sinking in gently, biting down as his hips start to pick up again.

The pleasure's too much now, tangled with pain and pressure until your body doesn’t know the difference. You're a trembling mess, whimpering, twitching, your muscles weak from everything he's already wrung out of you.

You don't know how he's still strong enough to shift your limp body, but suddenly you're on your back, legs pushed up and pinned high beside your shoulders. His hands curl behind your knees, holding you wide open as he sinks into you again with no warning.

He grunts as he slides home, balls-deep, moaning loudly, eyes locked onto your face, drinking every twitch, every gasp, every flutter of your lashes. His hips start pounding again, relentless, slapping into your soaked cunt with wet, brutal rhythm.

Your mouth falls open, lips slack, eyes half-lidded. You can't even speak.

“Baby! L-love you—ahhh!” Jake cries out. One of his hands slips down, thumb pressing to your clit and rubbing in tight, fast circles.

You twitch violently beneath him, chest heaving, body barely holding together.

Even with your consciousness slipping—your mind half-blacked out from pleasure and fatigue—you feel it again. That same heat blooming low in your belly. Your legs are burning in the mating press, your lungs clawing for air, your head spinning.

“J-Jake, w-wait!” you sob, shaking your head from side to side, voice cracked, but his thrusts only get harder, his thumb moving faster, and ruthless.

“Don’t stop, don’t stop—just one more,” he begs, almost delirious.

“FUCK!” you scream,  fingers twisting the sheets, your body shaking as it hits you. “Fuckfuckfuck!” you shriek as your entire core contracts violently. Your back arches. Your vision whites out. You feel the gush of hot liquid pulsing from your cunt, soaking the sheets, his pelvis, everything.

Jake groans loud and deep. But he doesn't stop. He keeps moving, keeps rubbing, his thumb grinding your clit as you cry out and shake under him. Your legs jerk in his grip, body trying to retreat, but he doesn’t let go.

Your voice cracks—"No! No more!"—but it's lost in the noise.  

“O-one more, baby, please,” he moans as he leans over you again, his body trembling, lips brushing your ear.

Your scream rises again as his cock drags through your soaked walls, now slick with your release. You’re squeezing him so tight he’s nearly frozen in place. His eyes roll back, mouth dropping open.

“Jesus Christ, people! Tone it down!” Jay roars from the other side of the wall, banging his fist hard against it, rattling the drywall. His voice is muffled, furious, but distant and irrelevant.

Jake doesn’t even blink. He’s too far gone. His hands tighten around your thighs as he slams forward, again and again, slick friction loud and obscene, the slap of your bodies echoing through the room.

“Last one,” he gasps. “Fuuuuck, baby, fuck—!”

You scream again, nails digging into his wrists as your body explodes for the final time—another hot gush forced from your cunt, a violent surge that splashes his abdomen and thighs. Jake throws his head back and howls, the tension in his spine snapping as you clamp down so hard around his cock it punches the orgasm straight out of him.

He cums inside you, trembling, moaning, his voice broken and high as he spills deep, cock twitching wildly, over and over. His whole body quakes as he presses into you, emptying himself in ragged pulses that stretch on and on.

By the time it ends, you're both shaking. The room is thick with heat and the sharp, musky scent of sex, every surface damp with sweat, slick, and release.

Jake pulls out slowly, carefully, and even that soft withdrawal makes you both moan. The two of you are oversensitive. 

Jake collapses beside you, arms immediately wrapping around your waist, pulling you in close. His face buries in the crook of your neck, lips pressing the faintest kiss to your skin.

You curl into him instinctively, legs tangled, your body heavy and sore but warm in the aftermath, without another word, you both drift under—naked, tangled in each other’s arms, unconscious on a mattress you’ve completely wet the bed in.

[slytherinboysvip]

Imagine best friend Mattheo being absolutely obsessed with his innocent little Hufflepuff bsf but she just can’t tell. Everyone else knows, and it is quite obvious, but she just can’t think someone like him would want someone like her. But when she jokingly says she’s gonna get Cedric to take her virginity he decides it’s time he came clean.

Possibly with some soft smut if you are comfortable with it of course

bsf mattheo riddle x hufflepuff reader

hopefully this matches your request <3 i’ll most likely make a part 2 for this because.. you’ll see ;) 3.5k words

you lived a rather simple uncomplicated life, attending hogwarts as a hufflepuff with no interest in anyone’s drama. though you kept to yourself most times you tried to be nice to all your peers maintaining your classic hufflepuff demeanor, despite this there was one thing that was different about you.

you see, you didn’t see or understand why people don’t like other houses just because of “house rivalry” especially the students who weren’t even participating in any sports or point winning. and with this over your years though you had few friends you had one best friend who at first seemed rather impossible to be friends with.. mattheo riddle.

when you two met you were a fourth year and him a fifth, coincidentally you were going on to a few friends about your annoyance with people automatically assuming the worst of slytherin even though you yourself weren’t in their house or nearly like one. mattheo overheard this heated- adorable voice coming from behind him and he walked towards you carefully.

he sat down in front of you beside your friend as she gawked faces towards you at his presence. “you don’t think we’re too mean, huh?” he questioned small laugh leaving his lips. “i just think that some people are misunderstood and just because some wizards turned out bad doesn’t mean all of them in your house are” you looked at him answering his question with ease

he smirked in amusement and leaned a little closer to you “hm, hufflepuff eh? what year are you puff?” he sat back examining you and you didn’t fail to notice that nickname he slipped in “fourth year but i have an early birthday which is annoying because i could technically be out sooner” you sighed ignoring his staring.

“well, seeing as it’s ravenclaw against gryffindor do you wanna watch the quidditch game with me i know the best view” he stood up and held his hand out for you, you look towards your friends and they’re both nodding their heads for you to go so you did.

from that point on you and mattheo had been best friends, sadly he was in his seventh year and now you in your sixth nothing much had changed in your life. living vicariously through mattheo and his stories about slytherin parties and how you should go to one with him before it’s too late, he’d tell you about his sexual adventures and your jaw would drop everytime.

you yourself also confided in him though with much less interesting things, telling him how you feel unlikeable by guys sometimes because they never try to get or talk to you, or how you feel lonely because you’ve never had a a boyfriend before. hed always help soothe the thoughts away, telling you that it’s only your brain making those things up , “listen y/n, anyone who doesn’t love you is fucking insane”.

𓆙

talking to your friend zarah who’d been there since day one you always told her what you told matt, for the most part. “i just don’t get why nobody is interested in me zar, like am i genuinely that ugly” you plopped onto your bed sighing dramatically. “you’re not ugly and if you think no guys want you you’re blind i know one in particular that really, really wants you” she giggled.

you looked at her with a confused expression “i must be missing something because i have no idea who you’re talking about” you awaited her response and she just rolled her eyes and sighed “girl your practically boyfriend of a best friend you do everything with” she gave you a duh look and you just laughed. you genuinely couldn’t believe she’d even think he’d like you especially with all the girls he’d been with, “you’re hilarious, we both know he doesn’t want me he wants all the girls he tells me about” you started to compose yourself but zarah’s expression didn’t change.

“you literally must be blind y/n do you need glasses? or should i say puff? let’s talk about how that man hasn’t stopped calling you that pet name since you’ve met.. he’s in love” she rolled her eyes raising her hands in the air. “i still don’t think he wants me so there’s no convincing me” you shrugged her off and she groaned getting up and leaving your shared dorm.

𓆙

“puff you gotta come to this party, slytherin won agains gryffindor i just know this is gonna be the party you want to go to pleaseee” mattheo put his hands on your shoulders shaking you “fiinee” you attempted to answer between shakes before he let you go “if i would’ve known it was that easy i would’ve done that years ago” he rolled his eyes.

“anyways it’s tonight at like 8 so i’ll just get you from your dorm at like 7 do you think they’ll let me in? actually what’s the password?” he didn’t give you time to finish any of your sentences before you just gave him the password “butterscotch” you whispered, in response mattheo laughed “fucking butterscotch merlin that’s hilarious” you looked up at him and rolled your eyes walking away.

“i’ll see you at 7 puff” he yelled across the hall and you just gave a thumbs up and continued walking. you honestly were quite nervous seeing as you’ve never necessarily been to a party before, you’ve made small appearances at hufflepuff parties but you’ve heard they don’t even compare to slytherin.

making your way into your dorm you spot zarah and you pull her up from the common room couch “i finally said yes to a party need help now” you quickly mumbled and she quickened her pace “when does it start girl i need the info right this second come on you’re talking too long for me” she rushed and you blurted it all out “8pm he’s getting me at 7 he has the password he will be at the dorm” closing the door behind you two you both stopped to catch your breath

“sooo is it a dateee” she shimmied her arm on you winking “i already told you he doesn’t like me!!” you replied to her relentlessness. “ugh whatever we need to get you ready girl it’s already six” she pushed you onto your shared vanity chair and pulled out all of your makeup and a few things of hers, “creative control?” she asked smirking at you “mm fine but not too much” you agreed “we’ll see” she giggled.

after around 30 minutes she finished your makeup and she showed you the finished product, looking at yourself in the mirror you thought how you never would’ve put on red lipstick yet you feel really good in it. she gave you a small smokey eye and a small winged liner and you felt you looked more aggressive then you were, but you kinda loved it.

“it’s so much but so pretty” you admired yourself and the makeup she put on you slowly getting used to the feeling of fake eyelashes on your eyes. “i’m so glad you love it, but we need to find an outfit like three hours ago” she joked and rushed to your closets “i actually have the perfect dress in mind if you’re feeling the want to rep slytherin green” she raised her eyebrows up at you in a suggestive matter “sure why not” you shrugged

she handed you a velvet body con forest green dress that you were sure was going to be extremely short and you mean in every place. she held it up onto you “this will be perfect. get it on come on” she rushed you into the bathroom and you began putting it on “this is sooo tight” you called out as you struggled “oh i forgot it was a corset back wait i need to help you can i come in” she yelled through the door

“yeah come on i need this thing one me already” you struggled more as she walked in and immediately began to help you loosening the strings of the dress and pulling it down onto you “there we go now suck in like your life depends on it” she said half jokingly and began retightening the corset back. with every pull it felt like your chest was spilling out more and more and your ribs were shrinking “okay merlin that’s enough before i can’t breathe” you huffed and she stopped tying it off in a bow

“stop you look so hot y/n i bet matt will be drooling” she teased and you just rolled your eyes “what do we do with my hair” you looked at her with horror as you only had ten minutes before he should arrive. you quickly began curling your hair not really caring if it was messy just giving it some body and just as you were spraying perfume on there was a knock on your door.

zarah looked at you and whispered “answer it go go now” she pointed to the door like she was afraid to touch it herself and you walked over opening it to see mattheo in an all black button down with the top few buttons undone and black dress looking pants yet somehow he didn’t look overdressed. he didn’t say anything for a minute he was just staring at you looking up and down in awe “holy fuck y/n who did your makeup you look woah” he put his finger on your chin moving your head around examining your makeup

“zarah isn’t it pretty” you smiled and he removed his hand and replied “yeah you are, now let’s go” he grabbed your hand and you looked behind you waving bye to zarah “he’s so in love with you” she whispered before the door slammed closed.

𓆙

once you got the the party you noticed there were already many slytherins already pregaming and mattheo brought you two to them, “let’s get some alcohol in you little puff” he winked and poured you a shot of who knows what, you smelled the foul drink and it made your nose burn “come on do ittt” he cheered on and you held your nose throwing the shot back gagging at the taste. “how do people enjoy that” you made a face at him “like this” he replied taking two shots himself, “now catch up” he winked pouring you yet another

“if i didn’t know any better id say you’re trying to get me drunk matt” you laughed and he looked at you amused “obviously that’s what im trying to do it’s a party” he put the shot glass to your lips and you parted them taking the burning substance down your throat, “eugh that didn’t get any better the second time” you shook your head in disgust. “hm, let me make you an actual drink” he grabbed a clear liquor and a red juice mixing them together adding more alcohol than your past two shots and handed it to you

“matt this smells foul” you looked up at him, “just try it trust me the slytherins have the masking drink down” he winked and you reluctantly took a sip, and to your surprise all you tasted was juice. after taking another few sips you quick began drinking it and mattheo pulled the cup from your lips “slow down there this shits dangerous you’ll get so drunk you won’t be able to walk straight” he chuckled. “it’s not my fault they made it taste like juice” you shrugged still sipping.

“hey mattheo have your little hufflepuff take some shots with us” enzo threw his arm around your shoulders and mattheo pushed them off almost immediately “no she doesn’t need any shots” he spoke “you didn’t even ask me” you protested, granted you didn’t necessarily want to take any shots you just didn’t like being talked for. “oo are you sure you’re not slytherin you got an attitude” enzo laughed handing you a shot and you looked at mattheo who rolled his eyes as you took the shot.

throwing the shot back the burning sensation took over your throat and you could feel it rushing down your throat. you coughed a bit and chugged your drink for comfort “puff you’re going to get shitfaced slow down” matt fully took your cup this time and you were already feeling it. giggling looking up at him “okay now who was going to tell me party’s are fun” you continued giggling.

the music started playing and the slytherin common room was now getting more and more packed. you saw fifth year students and up in here, even a few ravenclaw and hufflepuffs your recognized. to your surprise in the corner of the party you spotted cedric diggory talking to a group of girls holding a drink.

pansy noticed your head being stuck in a certain direction and followed your eyes “oh em gee, someone’s got their eyes on a certain hufflepuff” she winked shoving her shoulder at your “shhhhh he’s just nice to look at” you giggled at her and she giggled along “you two would be soo cute” she added dragging you back to the drinks

“let’s take some shots!” she exclaimed handing you two , you took them smiling and shot them back with her, a woo leaving her mouth. “here chaser, chaser!” she shouted handing you another drink this time what looked like a lot of the punch, downing it all she laughed “girl we’re gonna be gone”. looking around you were seeing doubles of everything but didn’t want the night to already end.

“so, are you a virgin?” pansy shouted over the music making your already alcohol flushed face even redder “pansy!! you can’t just ask that!!” you shouted back flustered at the intrusive question, “i’m only curious girl” she giggled and gave you begging eyes “come onnnn” she shook you till you gave in “fine yes i am but don’t tell anyone!” you replied back as lowly as you could over the music

“who would you lose it to?” she giggled “i lost mine to blaise hehe sshhhh” she winked, considering she just told you her secret you felt obligated and just looked around “i mean i guess cedric” you giggled as she pointed at him after your response. before she could say anything else you felt a pair of hands wrap around your waist and drag you off. trying to kick your way out was useless and they brought you to an empty dorm.

through all of this you couldn’t tell who it was kicking and screaming for them to let you go till you heard mattheos voice “puff calm down it’s just me” he sighed putting you down on what you now assumed was his bed “why did you bring me in here that was so scary” you huffed trying to gain your composure. “diggory?” he scoffed not answering your question.

you looked at him confused as to what he was on about “what do you mean? what about cedric” you cocked your head to the side in confusion “you lost your virginity to him??” he questioned stepping closer to you looking rather.. pissed. you just laughed in response “me? lose my virginity to cedric?.. you’re funny” yeah you fantasized about it but it certainly wouldn’t happen.

“what were you talking to pansy about then??” he looked at you unconvinced, “she asked if i lost it and i said no, but id let him take it.-“ you shrugged “besides you know i tell you everything matt i’ve never even had a boyfriend let alone a guy be interested in my virginity” you sighed laying back onto the bed now feeling upset.

you heard mattheo sigh and you picked your head up to look at him, his eyes stared back at you in silence before breaking it “believe me there’s a lot of guys who want to get in your pants” he rubbed his fists and you gave him a confused expression yet again “what are you on about matt?” you were getting sober just from all of this extra mystery.

he walked over to the bed sitting beside you, “listen when we met you were just.. blooming completely and i would be lying if i didn’t say i first went up to you because of your looks.. well overtime you know we became friends and i noticed other guys staring in ways they shouldn’t have been so i had to teach them a lesson.” he looked at you and yo didn’t know how to respond to something like that.

“what exactly are you saying matt?” you didnt understand what he was poking at, did matt mean to say he basically likes you? were you reading too much into this? “look y/n, no one else in this school fucking deserves you. hell i don’t deserve you but i know i can treat you how you need. don’t ask me what took so long to confess to you y/n, but do you feel even remotely the same?” he let it all out quick and fast, and your mouth dropped.

“you want.. me?” you looked at him in disbelief and he just smiled “that’s what that whole speech was about, yeah” he chuckled nervously awaiting your reply “why?” you sighed still slightly unconvinced “have you fucking seen yourself puff? you’re so undeniably gorgeous, i don’t know how i hold myself back from you everyday” he leaned in closer to you making this all seem more real. without thinking you allowed yourself to lean into him, faces and lips meeting for the most magical first kiss you could’ve ever imagined.

“you’re so fucking beautiful y/n” he grabbed your face pulling you closer to him till you straddled over his lap sitting down continuing the now makeout. “this is so much better than.. imagined” you huffed through the kisses. you could already feel mattheos member growing beneath you and you never thought you’d be the one experiencing this from your best friend.

you’d be lying if you didn’t admit to a fantasy or two about him in the past but this was already one thousand times better than ever imagined. mattheos lips kissed their way down your neck leaving small marks tiny moans leaving your mouth, “i need to hear more of that, y/n, let me eat you out.. please i need a taste” he continued his kisses along your neck bringing them back to your lips “i’ve never- mm yes” you replied as his fingers began making circles over your underwear.

“you sound so good fuck” he groaned pulling you off of him and getting off the bed, “you’re sure of this?” he questioned one last time and you just nodded impatiently awaiting his next move. next thing you knew he was yanking you to the edge of his bed and slowly removing your pants and underwear looking up at you from below. “holy fuck puff.. you’re fucking soaking” he breathed out over your pussy sending tingles down your spine.

without warning his mouth met your untouched area and you felt things never imaginable. his tongue made its way around your bulging clit, flicking it up and down and making his way to your entrance sucking and licking “you taste so good holy fuck” he huffed going right back in not even looking up at you, “can i put two fingers” he spoke from your pussy and you couldn’t even properly answer “mm y-yes” you replied between your moans.

you felt his slender fingers teasing your entrance and he slowly began inching one in and out teasingly, “mattheo-“ you huffed and he chuckled shoving both fingers in, loud moan escaping your mouth and this new feeling. he did a few different moments trying to figure out what makes you moan the most, soon his tongue was sucking expertly on your clit as his fingers twisters and curled inside of you.

“matt i want to.. try” you moaned at this pleasure wanting nothing more than to feel him inside of you now. “mm but you’re not ready yet puff” he continued devouring your pussy simply divulging in it as if he’d never eaten anything before. his pace on everything quickened and you were already near your own orgasm, “if you don’t s-stop i’m gonna cum” you moaned loudly trying to control yourself.

“let go for me sweetheart” he sucked harder on your clit, the nickname and action forcing your orgasm to flood over you harder than you’ve ever been able to make yourself experience. your body was shaking and you couldn’t hold your reactions back, mattheo slowly licked your gushing area clean before standing up “mm now i think you’ll be ready soon” he smirked leaning down over you, grabbing your chin and giving you a kiss.

[cxffecoupx]

seungcheol's mad. the members know just how to calm him down.

"YN! yn! you need to come to the practice room right now. seungcheol's furious!"

that's all you need to know before you leave your office in the pretext of grabbing lunch and head towards seungcheol's company building. even in the crazy traffic of the afternoon, the only thing running in your mind is the image of your angry boyfriend, eyes wide and lips pouted in annoyance.

which is exactly what greets you when you reach the boys' usual dance practice room that seungkwan called you to. you push open the door and see a few of them sitting down, faces pale from exhaustion, a few scattered doing some random tasks, and jeonghan standing next to seungcheol, chewing on his lips.

but seungcheol doesn't notice anything: he doesn't notice the way chan gently tugs at his shirt; the way his teammates take tense, heavy breaths in worry; the way jeonghan now pats his back, and certainly not your arrival into the room. you sidle over to seungkwan, who's face melts into relief at seeing you. he pulls you aside to brief you about the situation.

"the thing is, last week, we were told that we could take tomorrow off. but then they came in a few minutes ago, saying that we'd have extra practice tomorrow, since they pushed the broadcast recording a week earlier," he takes a moment to pause and looks over at seungcheol, who's still very unaware of everything around him.

"hyung's losing his mind because we'd all made individual plans for tomorrow. some of us were gonna go home for the weekend..." seungkwan's lips turn into a pout as he becomes aware of the fact that now he won't be able to. you turn around to look at your boyfriend.

"i want you to tell us why you preponed the date without consulting us first. it's not the extra practice we're worried about. it's the fact that you didn't care to ask us in the first place! aren't we the artists- no, i need you to listen to me right now- don't tell me to calm down!"

your lips press together in concern as you walk over to him. he doesn't see you even when you're standing right beside him, more intent on getting his point across.

"we've been working overtime since last month..."

"seungcheol..." you call him.

"...and yet, we haven't gotten a single break day-

"seungcheol."

"-and then you expect us to do our best and get more wins-"

"love..."

you hold his chin with your hand and gently turn his face towards you. the sudden shift in his glance is noticed only by you. the angry, outraged expression of his turns into a soft, meek look with just a single touch, sparkles automatically forming in his eyes as they focus on you. the staff beside you bows and leaves the room. your eyes follow them until they shut the door before moving back to his.

he slumps into your hand as you lean in to press a kiss, and wraps his around you, body feeling heavy. jeonghan nods and you lead seungcheol out into the breakroom.

his face still hangs low, lips losing their pout only when you press your lips to them. his frown turns into the smallest of smiles.

"thanks for getting me out of there. i was starting to lose my mind."

"kwan told me you were furious. i had to come running," you hold his cheek and he leans into your touch. his stomach grumbles in response.

"you might have been a little hangry back then. come on, let's get you some food," you drag him out of the building to a cafe nearby you often visit.

"sho you mean to shay you'd alwaysh come for me?" he mumbles through a mouthful of the hideously large croissant he'd ordered, a few crumbs and some chocolate filling dusting his lips.

"i don't like to be rushed..." you lean forward to wipe it off with your thumb with a fond smile, before licking it off.

"...but for you, i'd always come running."

inspired from this video on twitter (that completely, absolutely destroyed me because LOOK AT HIM?! adorable pouty cutie pie

[enhani-ki]

enhypen as your "stressed" boss

warnings: very suggestive content, cursing, etc.

when your job is suppose to make your boss' life easier but he gets hard to you instead...

HEESEUNG ─── ★

"do me a favor?" heeseung asked, lifting his necktie between two fingers like it was a dead thing. "fix this again… i swear these things come alive at night."

you exhaled slowly, not even dignifying that with a response. he didn't even bother standing up. he just stayed leaned back in his chair like he was doing you a favor by being seated.

heeseung's legs were spread open just enough for you to stand between them. his shirt sleeves were rolled up, the two buttons were left undone... it's enough to draw eyes, or maybe just to suggest something.

apparently, none of his past secretaries ever lasted more than two months. some said they quit, others claimed they were transferred, and according to office gossip, he couldn't even make it through the first week without anyone crossing a lineーyou could see why.

people believed what they wanted, but you've been working for him over a year now and had never actually fucked your boss like everyone said you had.

though, sometimes… you kind of wish the rumors were true.

your fingers started moving automatically. you looped the fabric, tightened the knot, and smoothed his collar… you could probably do this in your sleep by now.

"don't look so serious," he murmured with a soft chuckle. "pretend you love doing this for me."

you glanced at the guy who was already looking up at you. "love is a strong word, boss," you muttered before resting your hands on his shoulders, "but i ca—"

the door swung open suddenly, making both of you jump in surprise. the intern's eyes went wide, stammering, "i—i—i'll just come back!" like they just walked in on a porn set, before slamming the door shut.

you stepped back instantly, running a hand down your face with a sigh. "great. that's gonna be all over the building before lunch," you said, making him chuckle again.

"heeseung," you said sternly. he actually preferred it when you used his name like that—just casual and familiar, even if you only say it when it was just the two of you. "you really need to learn how to tie your own damn tie."

he whined, "i don't want toooo."

JAY ─── ★

you're sitting on the edge of his bed, legs swinging slightly, doing everything in your power not to look anywhere inappropriate while your boss buckled his belt in front of you.

this was the third time this week that jay had been late to work. he kept oversleeping, ignoring calls, blaming traffic and accidents that never even happened.

you've seen this version of him before, back when he lost all his motivation and nearly quit. this time, you weren't letting it get that far.

you let yourself into his apartment, pushed open the heavy blackout curtains, dragged him half-asleep out of bed, and make sure he gets to office in time.

"thanks for coming to get me," he muttered. his voice was still raspy from sleep, running a hand through his messy hair. "my alarm's been… off lately."

you reached for a pillow without thinking. you hugged it tightly to your chest, burying your face in the soft fabric, trying to hide the heat creeping up your cheeks.

jay smirked, catching the way you refused to look at him before shamelessly staring at your bare legs that's still swinging awkwardly above his floor. "you always get this shy?" he laughed, tugging the tank top down over his torso with a little stretch.

"just fucking hurry!" you muttered angrily into the pillow.

he chuckled again, shaking his head at his cute assistant while grabbing his keys from the nightstand. "you can wait in the living room next time if you don't want to see me naked again."

you peeked, "and let you fall back asleep? no way."

JAKE ─── ★

jake has been side eyeing you. he cleared his throat butー "don't even say it," you muttered before he could even speak.

he crossed his arms, eyebrows raising. "say what?"

"that you need another coffee... i know i'm your assistant but honestly, you look like shit."

"oh, wow..." his mouth fell open, amused. "you always look sexy whenever you scold me, you know that?"

"yes."

he blinked, taken aback by your bluntness—then snorted, shaking his head with a grin as he leaned back in his chair. "...then be careful. i'm ten seconds away from dragging your ass over here."

you rolled your eyes, unfazed. "you say that like it's a threat."

jake spun slowly in his chair, eyeing you with a grin before biting his lip. "come here... let me touch something that doesn't make me want to scream."

SUNGHOON ─── ★

you knocked once before stepping in, sunghoon didn't even look up. he was seating behind his desk, sleeves rolled up, tie already discarded somewhere across the room. his hair is a mess from running his hands through it too many times.

he looked pissed. "about the meeting..." you started carefully, "i already sent the corrected draft."

"okay..." he replied, eyes still locked on his screen. "i think i'm going to have a fucking aneurysm."

you hesitated. "…are you?"

sunghoon looked at you like, seriously? before smirking, "depends. are you planning on doing that thing again...?"

you smiled a little. "depends. are you going to give me a few vacation leaves after?"

sunghoon leaned back in his chair, finally letting out a breath. "yes. and i'm going with you too."

you raised a brow. "oh? as my boss?"

"no... as someone even worse, baby."

SUNOO ─── ★

sunoo was laying across the couch, resting his head perfectly in your lap while wearing a soft, hydrating face mask on his face.

his hand traced circles on your knees while you ran your fingers through his soft hair, nails scratching lightly against his scalp. "you're too good at this..." sunoo murmured. "you trying to make me lose my mind?"

“i thought you already lost it?"

he smiled faintly. "which one do you think's doing it? the scalp massage or your attention?"

you chuckled, "which one do you like more?"

"hmm…" he hummed again, giving your knee a playful squeeze. "both. mostly your attention." he was about to close his eye but then he suddenly raised his brow, lips quirking. "why do you always touch your boss like this when you're off the clock though??"

"are you okay? you're the one on my lap."

sunoo smiled, closing his eyes. "sorry but you can't report me at my own house," he teased, then continued, "i can say whatever i want."

your hand slid in his chest. "i might start saying things back." you said, making sunoo sat up without any warning, signature eye smile started dropping through his ridiculous face mask.

"start talking."

JUNGWON ─── ★

"what are you looking at?" jungwon said without even turning his head as he could feel your eyes on him.

he hasn't spoke much since he walked in. he just buried himself behind his screen. you blinked, looking down at your desk like you hadn't been caught staring. "no—nothing."

he sighed through his nose before loosening his tie.

truth was, he hadn't been able to focus for the past hour because of you. and the way you bit your pen while choosing from the series of his pictures, making his brain short-circuit.

he really was trying to be good today.

you stood and walked over, leaning slightly over his desk to drop off a file. jungwon's fist clenched lightly on the desk as his eyes lowered right to the edge of the table, where your hip was angled just slightly in his direction. oh, it'd be so easy if you just drop to your knees now—

you tilted your head. "boss... you okay?"

he nodded eagerly. "yeah. yeah—just stressed." he said before looking up at you again, looking so innocent even though his tongue was pressing into his cheek, legs bouncing uncontrollably under the desk.

"...it's making me think of things i probably shouldn't about my assistant."

you blinked, confused. "whaーwhat?"

jungwon cleared his throat and quickly looked away, cheeks growing faint pink in embarrassment. "ignore that. i didn't say anything."

he avoided your eyes, rubbing the back of his neck... feeling how tight his pants suddenly felt.

NI-KI ─── ★

you tapped your foot impatiently as ni-ki walked past you in nothing but a towel and toothbrush hanging from his lips.

he pointed vaguely toward the bathroom, eyes half-lidded, and mumbling something incoherent before disappearing behind the door.

you checked the time as thirty minutes passed. why the fuck he was moving like a sloth?

"ni-ki?" you called, knocking on the bathroom door but there's no answer. you frowned before pushing it open, and just as you suspected, he's not there. the shower hasn't even been turned on.

"ni-ki!" you stormed into his bedroom—only to find him curled up on his bed, hugging his pillow like a baby. ni-ki groaned, cracking one eye open. "ughh, the fuck you so loud for?"

you marched over and shook his body, "we're gonna be late!"

and instead of getting up, he just reached out and pulled you into the bed like a goddamn trap. he locked you in his arms and buried his face into your neck. "let me borrow you real quick," he mumbled, his breath felt warm against your skin.

"ni-kiー" you struggled, squirming in his hold.

"shhh," he shushed you, tightening his grip with a little smirk, "you keep calling my name like that, i'll make sure you'll moan it out the next."

a/n: random ahh fic. posted this with round with my baby - reader x ni-ki

similar: ENHYPEN AS YOUR "HOMEBOYS"

masterlist: マスターリストm.list