#but it feels like everyone forgets that fact

[nyashykyunnie]

˗ˏˋ Entry : 046 - Jinwoo x Fem! Reader ◛⑅·˚ ༘ ♡ ˎˊ˗

ₓ˚. ୭ ˚○◦˚𝕊𝕦𝕟𝕘 𝕁𝕚𝕟𝕨𝕠𝕠˚◦○˚ ୧ .˚ₓ

╰┈➤ ❝ [ All of Him ] ¡! ❞

His Hands

Long and slender fingers who would never dare to harm your precious body and only aims to ever pamper and care for you. His lingering touches would always feel slightly ticklish as it ghosts over your delicate skin. 

Jinwoo would never dare lift a heavy hand on you.

Hell, he would rather cut his limbs off than ever dare to imagine it.

His hands will never fail to caress your face, his thumb swiping affectionately across your fluffy cheek. 

Jinwoo would always offer his hand to you wherever you two may be. He just can’t get enough of you really.

And maybe it’s also because he has developed separation anxiety over the years of spending his time in the gates fighting wars against the monarchs and the beasts they have summoned to attempt making him submit to them.

So really, how could he not cherish you after spending almost decades being battered in a bloody hellscape? 

Jinwoo wants nothing more than to pamper and care for you with his hands.

Hands that have ended many but will always, always, be gentle for you and you only.

His Eyes

Oh his eyes, those charming grey eyes of his.

They would look at you like you’re the only existence that would ever matter in this godforsaken world.

His foes recognize him with the familiar blazing lilac in his eyes. Once they see that color, they know their existence will undoubtedly disappear from this world or maybe they will be turned into one of his abominations.

With everyone else, he was always a cold and stoic person, the warmth that he had once disappeared overtime with his growth as a player. Everyone around him would always be afraid of his eyes. They say that when they look at him it’s akin to staring directly at the abyss.

Hence why people would always avoid looking at him.

But with you?

With you, it’s different.

He wouldn’t have a hint of lilac in his eyes.

Lilac is the shadow monarch.

Grey is Sung Jinwoo.

Grey is your Jinwoo.

As long as you’re in his sight, everything is beautiful.

Though this world is littered by cruelty and unsightliness, Jinwoo forgets all of it the moment you are in view.

He looks at you as his goddess.

Everything that you are and will ever do is beautiful. There’s really nothing he could say or think to describe anything else.

So long as you are here, everything is seen through rose-colored lenses.

When Jinwoo looks at you, the emptiness and sadness in his weary heart would disappear in an instant. He wishes that he can just spend every waking moment by your side and overlooking you as you did usual menial activities. Everything that you do is extremely adorable to him after all.

He just can’t help it, he can’t help but love you. 

His Arms

Strong and firm, his arms have ended a lot of his foes brutally. But to you?

They're your safe haven.

When everything gets too cold, you can always count on Jinwoo to embrace you and share his warmth with you.

When the world becomes too overwhelming, you hide in his arms that doesn't question you and would immediately sheler you into safety.

Jinwoo would always cradle you into his loving arms.

He in fact loves it the most when you're tucked into his embrace. He gets to pamper you with so much affection.

Though he would always be mindful and make sure he doesnt squeeze you too much.

The strength of the shadow monarch isn't one to be trifled with.

So he, who loves you more than anything else in the world— Wishes nothing more than to make sure you are safe and sound in his embrace.

His Body

Tall, dark and handsome.

Jinwoo's frame is something he honed to perfection to complement his role as the shadow monarch.

He is powerful and imposing.

His figure sends a shiver on anyone's body the moment he is on sight.

Lanky may he be, but he is the perfect vessel for war. He trained himself to the absolute limits.

And his skin shows proof of it all.

Burn scars from the late monarch Antares.

Multiple and giant scars that prove his decades of war.

Oh but to you?

He uses it to care for you.

He'd use his exceptional strenght to carry gifts for you or carry all the luggage he has undoutebly forced you to accept during your many, many shopping sprees.

Honestly he does it so often that you completely forget that he is actually a man that ended monarchs and demons alike. In your eyes? He is just someone who enjoys being of service to you.

Jinwoo's towering figure would always make you feel extremely small, but not to the point he makes you feel afraid.

You know this man better than anythign else, he also wishes to use himself as a shield for everything else that dares to try and harm you.

He'd always lift you up in his arms and pull your face into the crook of his neck.

When he does that, you know better than to lift your head up and dare to look at anywhere else. When Jinwoo does that, it means that he made quite the scene with someone who dared to disrespect you in front of his eyes.

You pretty eyes are only meant to see pretty things.

And Sung Jinwoo is dead set on making sure of that.

His Lips

Those sweet, pink and thin lips of his.

Lips that open to praise you like you're a precious flower.

Lips that could never get enough of you when he peppers you with loving pecks and kisses.

Jinwoo's normally empty and harsh words would morph into tender ones. As if he has a language made to be used for you only.

His kisses are feathery light, aiming to kiss every inch of you. From your forehead, to your cheeks, to the corners of your lips, to your collarbone and your delicate digits.

Jinwoo is never good with his words, but he makes up for it with his delicate pecks.

He will never go by 2 minutes without kissing you somewhere whether it was a gentle one or one where he's utterly frustrated with how cute you are that he can't help himself.

He'd be in a sour mood if he goes by a day without your kisses.

The first time it happened it was a complete hellday for his coworkers since he was exceptionally prissy that day.

So Jinwoo makes sure to shower you with loving pecks before he is off to work.

On his Knee

As the shadow monarch, he makes everyone around him grovel to the ground. His existence itself exudes regality that they'd instinctively be on their kness.

You're an exception though.

The same man who makes every being around him beg for mercy and ultimately lower themselves into nothing more than isignificant beings; the same man who has humbled the monarchs into nothing more than a pile of ashes and bones—

He will be down on one knee for you.

"Sarang, you know what this means, don't you?" He says in a tender voice when he lowered himself down to the ground.

In this paradise that he takes you to every once in a while, the secret garden he built himself by turning a dying island into a lush forest with flowers all around you both— Jinwoo is down on one knee in this very place that is for you and you only.

"I'm not good with words hahah, I might screw up the atmosphere with how flimsy and stupid I am with confessing my feelings," He chuckles softly, taking out a small velvet box and opening it to reveal a golden band with a gleaming gem on it. "But know that I will do anything for you."

"Do you want the world at your knees? I can do that. But knowing how kind and selfless you are, I know you wont let me do such a thing. Still, I want you to know that all that I am and all that I'll ever be is yours. I love you. More than anything in this world. I don't know how I can show you how completely and utterly devoted I am to you. If you want to use me as a bridge to get you to where you want to be, so be it. If you want to use me as the stepping stone to reach your dreams, then I'll let you use me however you want."

"Just know that I love you so much."

In those grey eyes you can see a blaze that will only be there when it's looking towards you, a fire that will only burn for you.

This man is willing to dance atop the flames if it means to make you happy.

Jinwoo would let himself burn for you.

"I don't really need anything fancy" You tearfully smile, extending a hand to him to which he gently takes. "I just want to spend my life with you and the next ones."

"Then we will." Jinwoo cooes as he slips the ring onto your finger and brings it up to his lips to kiss it, now murmuring against your soft skin "In every lifetime I'll find you, fall in love with you, and marry you. I want to be your husband and be the father to your children."

"Just as long as you're in my reach, I am capable of doing anything."

꒰ 🪼 A/N: We're so back now my precious guppies. I hope you guys like my new layout too since it's simpler and easier for our eyes now www. It's still my branding style so xDD!!! I just switched up a few elements here andStarting out slow and steady with a Jinwoo proposal fic because I love my hubby. ꒱

ʚ(੭´͈ ᐜ `͈)੭ .｡✧: ~♡ —! stories written by kyunnie; translations, reposts, plagiarism are strictly forbidden.

[acoazlove]

Spiralling Inside

Azriel x Reader

Summary: Spiralling into your head is damaging, and there’s only one person who can help you.

Word count: 1.3k

Warnings: a little bit of angst, fluff

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Loneliness isn’t a feeling the soul is supposed to feel, to experience.

It’s isolating, whether it's self-inflicted or out of one's control, it can break you. It feels like no one can save you from that feeling. How do you know that someone will help you out of the feeling, and stop you from spiralling all over again?

You don’t know. That’s the scary part, you’re supposed to have faith. Trust wholeheartedly in someone that they won't make you feel like that ever again.

The kind of trust you’re supposed to have with yourself. So what happens when you can’t even trust your own brain from thinking of all the worst scenarios? Make you think that everyone hates you. That you’re not worthy of loving friendships. You are not good enough. They are only around you because they pity you.

They hate me. A common thought for an overthinker, a hurt person. No one wants those words swirling around their head.

Even while talking one-on-one with someone, a friend, it feels as if your mind is making you feel like they are only interacting with you because they feel bad for you. Like they know how lonely you are.

A larger event is even worse because you are alone. Everyone has someone to talk to, to be with. Someone to call their own. You don’t.

The same people who call you family are the ones who seem to forget you’re standing beside them, because ‘you are so quiet.’ Why say something if it doesn't add to the current topic? So you keep quiet, keep to yourself.

Not one person notices when you spiral when you get so deep in your mind that you can’t claw your way out. Can’t silence those voices. Except for one person.

Azriel. Your person. Your other half. Your mate. And while standing in the middle of the Night Court’s ballroom, with your family, talking to each other, he notices.

You suppose that’s one of the upsides to him being the spymaster. He notices you. He sees you.

“Angel?” His soft voice reaches your ears before he appears in front of you. Blocking your view of the rest of the world. So it's just him.

A scarred but gentle hand reaches for yours, subtly pulling out of the crowded room. You only notice you have moved when a cooling breeze brushing your face. Azriel’s hands are on you next, cupping your face so gently that an on-looker might think he is holding the most precious jewels.

“My love?” You finally meet his gaze, his swirling jade and amber eyes. Holding his emotions out on a silver platter for you. Only for you.

He watches your brows pinching, silver lining your eyes, features twisting in guilt and sadness. “I’m sorry.” The defeat in your voice physically pains him. His features softening, thumbs swiping the tears that fall unwanted.

“No. You have nothing to be sorry for.” The conviction in his dulcet voice helps to slowly pull you from your self-deprecating shell. An arm wraps around your waist, pulling you into a tight embrace, his other hand moves to the back of your head, cradling you to the crook of his neck, smothering you in his scent. Your arms wrap around him quickly, so tight as if you’re worried he’d disappear. And based on where your thoughts are right now, your mind thinks he very well might.

The scent that helps ground you. A fact you had told him early on in your relationship, even before you mated. A fact he kept in the very forefront of his mind for moments exactly like these.

Deep breaths tickle his throat. Breathe in as much of him as you can. If only you could fuse with him. You wouldn’t ever have to be away from him.

A calloused hand runs through your hair soothingly. His other hand rubbed up and down your back, in the way he found helped calm you the most. Pressing featherlight kisses to your forehead and temple. Whispering sweet nothings into your skin.

“What happened, angel?” Feeling the rumble of his words as he speaks, vibrating into your own form. You shrug in response. “Just got in my head.” Words muffled against his neck.

You pull away from his neck, a huff leaving you at how much of your hair is in your face from the movement. A watery laugh leaves you as Azriel tries to push it out of your face. A loving smile tugs at his lips at the endearing sound.

Once it's out of the way, you look up at your mate through wet lashes. Your cheeks flushed and tear-stained. “There she is.” His voice is so adoring it makes your heart skip a beat. His hazel gaze searches your face, looking for what, you don’t know.

“I’m fine, Az. I just-“A heavy sigh leaves you as you try to verbalise your thoughts. “I just started thinking too much when they turned away from me, which I know sounds self-conceited and narcissistic but-“ your rambling gets cut off by Azriel’s mouth meeting yours. Releasing a contented sigh as you sink into the kiss. So full of love and feelings that can’t be put into words.

He pulls away just enough to rest his forehead against yours, his hands cupping your face once again. “I know you, my love. You are the most selfless, intelligent, and kindhearted person I have ever met. And yes your brain works against you sometimes, but that does not make you self-conceited or narcissistic. You cannot beat yourself up over something you can’t control.” He presses a featherlight kiss to the tip of your nose. “They all love you. Don’t let your mind tell you otherwise. They are around you because they want to be.”

You feel your bottom lip tremble under the weight of his words. “I love you. More than anything, more than what should be possible. You’re my mate.” A kiss to your forehead “My other half.” Another kiss to the corner of your mouth. “I love you, my angel.” A lingering kiss to your lips.

Your hands slide up his arms to rest on top of his wrists. Only pulling away when air is needed. Turning your head to brush a kiss to the palm of his hand. Pulling his hand from your face to thread your own with them.

”I love you with my whole being Azriel. More than you’ll ever know.” Voice raspy from your tears, but so sincere a smile pulls at his lips. Pressing one more kiss to the crown of your head before taking a single step back to get a proper look at you.

”Do you want to go back in there, or go home?” Tone still gentle. A small shake of your head. “We should go back in.” He nods, moving to step back towards the ballroom. But a tug of his hand stops him, immediately looking for something wrong in your expression, but a smirk tugs at your lips. “How does my makeup look?”

A snort leaves him, and he brushes a thumb under your eye before leaning back dramatically to get a better view, a giggle leaving you at the movement, a boyish grin taking over his face at the sound. “Looks perfect. Just like you, my love.” Wrapping an arm around your waist, leading you towards where you left the rest of your family.

As they come back in view, smiles light up their faces, but your focus is pulled back up to the male at your side. He smiles down at you as Mor and Feyre start gossiping about something they had heard from one of the courtiers.

Leaning into your mate's warmth as you listen to their rambling. You know you’ll be just fine as long as you have Azriel by your side.

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a/n: I know this isn't part five for a new place, but I've personally been over thinking quite a lot recently, and once i started writing this it just kept flowing. so this is dedicated to all my overthinkers. hoped you enjoyed <3

[seneon]

FRAT HOUSE ──── featuring tomura, touya, keigo.

about. attempted headcanons of the trio as frat boys. alcohol, cigarettes, girls mentioned. y'know, typical frat stuff.

notes. me and @angeliicheartt's new obsession apparently

.𖥔 ݁ TOMURA SHIGARAKI

the quiet one. first of all, tomura isn't that much of a party-guy. he's a gamer— almost stuck to his room and probably rotting in there for days up to weeks. regardless whether he's a gamer or not, he's known around as a frat. in fact, the president of the fraternity.

it's a shock to many because of how he appears in college outside the parties. his dull and saddening appearance. but really, when there's a party in his house, his leadership skills make it all worthwhile to the club and they were all nights you nor any other souls will ever forget.

tomura's an occasional smoker— he only does it at parties only. he's always influenced by either you or touya when you both edged him to try a few inhales and exhales. he's not too much of a drinker too, because he knows with just a few sips, and he's all dreamy and his cheeks are flushed red with the prominent evident of alcohol consumption.

.𖥔 ݁ TOUYA TODOROKI

everyone wonders why the president and assistant president of the frat club are so quiet. well touya just doesn't like to mingle around too much. he's always at the corner, watching everything unfold. a drink’s in his hand, either a cigarette in his other hand, or his phone.

let's not forget he'll realistically have a girl or two trying to get a feel of his skin so he will either have to play along for the fun of it or spew poison to their souls so they will leave him alone.

when touya does feel different and mingle around though, you'll see playing table games with other college boys. he comes in competitive, having the absolute want to win every single go-pong game. his patience might run thin though, but he'll always come and find you for a smoke or two outside tomura's house.

.𖥔 ݁ KEIGO TAKAMI

mr. party monster. the one and only man who provides the killer music of the party. somehow keigo’s the most excited for the party, even more than his two enthusiastic leaders of the club. well no matter, he's got a playlist stacked up for unforgettable nights anyways.

loves to have his hand on a woman's waist or hips. he'll only feel completed with a woman by his side, his fingers controlling the disc, or a drinking competition with touya. if anything, keigo's the averagely typical frat boy in any western movies or series. he takes pride in being known as the most popular boy of school.

likely to snap out of his party monster mood and suddenly grow bored at one tiny moment. so during that tiny moment, he spends it yapping with you on the couch, food in your laps as you both talk that moment away until his party mood slowly creeps back onto his skin. it's highly over for you, since he'd drag you along to dance with him to the music he chose. can you keep you with his blazing enthusiasm?

© SENEON 2024 ♱ do not repost, alter, or translate.

[celestiamour]

ft. logan howlett, ororo munroe, laura kinney, wanda wilson, wade wilson, kurt wagner, jean grey, scott summers (separate) x f! reader — xmen, marvel

╰₊✧ how they are when you are on your time of the month┊1k words

contains: some smutty topics for logan & jean, periods and all the complimentary side effects obviously because it’s so generous ahahahahaaaaaaaaa

➤ author's note: oh how i hate being a woman at times, if only some strong mutants could come to life and help ease the suffering…

let’s get this out of the way— yes, logan howlett can smell it and is able to tell when you’re on our period. in fact, he’s even able to sniff out the difference between the blood from menstruation and the blood from injuries. he’s been… “around the block” to put it lightly, he knows what you are going through, will be nice about it, and will use his experience to help care for you. he won’t be as sassy as he usually is even if you are a bit snappy, he’ll get extra food and put aside snacks for you, and he’ll give you as much or as little space as you want. also very willing to eat you out or cuddle-fuck you during it, being a little messy doesn’t faze him and he’s probably done nastier. 8/10, he’ll help you get through it without any complaint.

ororo munroe knows when your cycle is coming before you do, she keeps track of it and is on duty to take care of you the second you wake up with that uncomfortable feeling in your panties. she’s already inside the bathroom attached to your room running a warm bath completely with bath bombs and flower petals, ready to carry you into the water, and to strip your bedsheets for a wash if they get stained. there’s even a cute little wicker basket full of candies and drinks on your bedside with a stuffed animal she brought from target sitting on your bedside. it may seem excessive to some for something that happens every month, but she believes the effort is worth it if it means easing your pains. 10/10, she’s an angel descended from heaven in your eyes.

both of your dads are pretty useless (worst! logan is less knowledgeable than his original counterpart) on the topic and althea gives you a piece of chocolate at most, so you and laura kinney need to take care of each other when shark weeks come around. so many cuddles, kisses, and movie nights while snacking because cravings are a bitch. she’ll pat you on the back and rub your shoulders, muttering little “i know, princess, i know” as you whine. don’t even think of moving if you’re in a position like that, she’ll run around the house to get you pain relievers and a hot water bottle. 9/10, she’s such a wonderful girlfriend.

not sure why, but i feel like you and wanda wilson’s periods would sync a lot? anyhow, it’s a nightmare dealing with mood swings, cramps, and cravings all while taking care of babypool, so there’s a general rule not to take anything seriously during those days because you’re both sensitive and irritable. once it’s all over though, you’re back in each other’s arms and apologizing for anything that might have been said or done (nothing serious happened, it’s just something like “i’m sorry for saying that in an off tone and making you think i was mad at you”). 5/10, could be a lot better but the days afterward are kinda like honeymoon bliss again.

wade wilson is the biggest shit of them all, he definitely says “and that’s on period” every time he finds out, calls you his little ketchup bottle, sends you period cramp moodboards which are just poorly cropped photos of him in the deadpool suit doubled over in pain from a fight— however, he will make you laugh so hard you’ll cry and forget about the ache in your body. 2/10 in terms of helpfulness but 10/10 in terms of funny jokes and conversations. 

you’ll give poor kurt wagner a heart attack every time you whine out in pain and curl up on the couch, clutching onto your stomach and contorting about to find a comfortable position. despite the promises from yourself and everyone else that you will be fine as the aching feeling is temporary, he can’t help but bite his nails from worry. the suffering of people with a uterus will never cease to shock him, they really have to bleed freely like that for a few days every month? he will not leave you alone and is going to treat your every request like an order from royalty. anything you want, you get, and no amount of assurance is going to convince him he doesn’t have to do all that, so you might as well enjoy it while you’re moody and suffering. 

jean grey is one of those people who just don’t have period cramps and still glows despite it all which you are so fucking jealous of. that being said, she’s the best person to be around when it hits. since she’s basically the mansion’s school nurse, she always has snacks, water, pads/tampons of every variety, and pain relievers on hand with so much bounty that she never seems to run out. as your girlfriend, she’s also willing to be a bit sneaky and write you a doctor’s note to get you out of classes regardless of if you are a teacher or a student. she’s also down to fuck even if you’re on your period since she knows orgasms are proven to lessen the pain and she’ll also massage your tits if they are feeling tender (and because she likes your chest no matter the size). 9/10, she can be a bit busy at times but is perfect aside from that.

please hold hands with scott summers and go with him when picking out pads/tampons, he will get overwhelmed by the amount of options and panic buy one of everything. what are wings? liners? what’s the difference between yellow and green, is it lemon or lime? he might forget that you’re more sensitive during these times and slip a comment into a conversation that would make you cry when it usually makes you laugh, but he’ll remind you to stay hydrated, will go out of his way to buy you brownies from your favorite bakery, and will smother you in cuddles. 

[stellocchia]

I love the headcanon of Killer having ADHD, but I never see it explored much despite it being so popular. So here's a list of how ADHD may affect him based on my own experience:

- He remembers he's said something, but doesn't remember to who and just assumes it was everyone who needed to know. It was not.

Imagine the amount of times he's noticed a detail and told the Chara in his mind to not forget only to then forget they're the only one he spoke to about it. Sure, this is gonna be a problem while living under Chara or Nightmare if they find out (I say 'if' because Killer may play the part of the fool with them to lower their guard and him not noticing shit would fit right in), but it's also gonna be troublesome when he's already living with Color.

Imagine he scheduled his next therapy appointment and the only person he told that to is the voice in his head, like, that's bound to end up in a few skipped sessions.

- Remembers only one task at a time unless he writes them down.

I don't doubt that Chara and Nightmare both tried to beat some memory into him, but, surprise surprise, abuse doesn't cure ADHD. For some reason, they're both shocked to find this out.

Killer may develop the strategy of just repeating the list of tasks in his head with the exact cadence and rhythm they were told to him in over and over again as he's doing them to keep them in mind if he doesn't have access to a way to write the orders down. It works pretty well as long as he never stops doing it. As soon as he stops, anything but the task he was currently focusing on disappears.

- Inability to focus on only one thing at a time as it's too understimulating.

I know this one feels like a contradiction to the last one, but imagine it more as 'can't focus on reading unless you're also listening to something or fidgeting with your hands, or walking in circles'. More than one sense has to be stimulated at all times unless you wanna dissociate.

And, to be fair, Killer probably spent most of his time under Chara and Nightmare dissociating anyway, so it's possible that he discovered this neat little trick only after leaving with Color, most likely after starting therapy. Because, while Color of course tries his best to help, he also doesn't have all the knowledge and experience necessary to always know how.

- Irregular sleeping patterns.

This guy probably barely sleeps most of the time under Chara and Nightmare, both because they only allow him to as a reward if he's been good, and because it's such a vulnerable position to be in that it isn't worth it.

But, even once he's settled in with Color, my guy is still gonna swing between sleeping 3 hours and 12 hours straight depending on the day. He may lay down for a nap in the afternoon only for him to wake up the next day. Especially if he's kinda bored. Buddy's sleeping schedule is gonna give Color a heart attack.

- Frequent bouts of depression.

Depression and ADHD are linked together heavily, if he has ADHD it's highly likely that he suffers from depression too.

I mentioned it before, but I think his coping mechanism for that is locking himself in Stage 2, although he's not doing so consciously. Stage 2 is just the most likely one to be able to handle the increased anxiety/paranoia and apathy that come with it. He's also the least likely to change his behavior, so outsiders may miss the fact that they're in a vulnerable position. This, however, is a double edged sword because that guy is shit at taking care of the body and himself and may just go without eating and sleeping until he collapses, all while dissociating the whole time.

- All-consuming bouts of hyperfixation that leave him feeling empty once they fade.

The hyperfixation could be related to specfic AUs, characters within them (he doesn't consider anyone real anyway) or even tasks, weapons, animals, specific people.

For as long as the hyperfixation lasts, he struggles thinking of anything else and/or being happy/interested/focused while thinking about anything else. Of course, every time he thinks that maybe this is the interest that's gonna stick only for it to eventually fade and leave him feeling empty, maybe even kick-starting another bout of depression. There are ways to cope with that (pushing yourself to explore interests outside of you hyperfixation and establishing a healthy routine outside of it helps), however I think he'd only start exploring those once he's with Color and in therapy because mental health under Nightmare and Chara isn't really a thing. He's too busy trying to remain functional with them for that shit.

-

Of course, there's more to it, but those are the things I personally love to give Killer the most. That and the fact that he's easy to distract with something colorful and that is one of the reasons why he likes Color so much (same). Though that one's just funny tbh.

[nectardaddy]

songs in the gravel . . . a. miya + f!reader

⋆｡ bitter winds | wc: 769

warnings . . . angst, failed past relationship, talk of aging and the feelings associated with it, feelings of being left out/left behind, regret, loneliness 

The man sighed as he leaned against the kitchen counter, the marble edge leaving a small indentation on his arm from just how long he’d been standing there. He didn’t mean to get carried away with doom scrolling through social media, his other hand on his cheek. Didn’t mean to roll his eyes as another one of his brother’s wedding photos passed his feed, and surely didn’t mean to linger on a photo that made his heart ache. A simple photo, really, a few friends gathered in a bar and nothing more. But it was her. It was always her. He felt his stomach drop as soon as the picture popped up minutes earlier, and felt a pang that rattled his insides all the way to the bone. 

He couldn’t help but stare, to hover over the picture for far too long. He hadn’t spoken to her in years, frankly forgot about her until the moment hit him with force and nearly brought him to his knees. She was a bit older, as was he, and despite the wide grin she held in the image he could pick out the small lines near her lips that weren’t there before. Maybe she stayed in the sun while in his absence, maybe it was stress, or the daunting fact that both were getting older. He often tried to repress the thought of aging, but the few, tiny gray hairs that peaked through faux blonde made it hard to forget. It was even harder knowing that everyone around him seemed to progress while he did not. 

The off season brought him home, but home was empty. No longer living with his parents, but a rather nice apartment that he used to share with his brother. But his brother had gotten married a few months ago, and left the apartment cold and empty. No more laughter, no more teasing, and no more seeing Osamu’s stupid face in the morning. At first, he was overjoyed with the concept of living alone. But then the loneliness crept in. Settled in shallow veins late at night when he tried to go to sleep, and remained throughout the day as every corner he turned held no one. 

He felt like he was getting left behind. Hometown friends coming and going, moved entirely, or had other things to do than drink in a barren apartment. Kita had gotten married, started a family, and now lived on a farm. Suna would rather stay in Shizuoka than the “hick ass city” (as he put it) of Hyōgo, so he was rarely ever in town anymore. Aran, while home more often, was often hard to reach. And his teammates, understandably, made plans to see their own families during the off season - leaving him, undeniably alone. 

Excruciatingly alone. 

The isolation was gentle at first, slowly creeping upon him like a pot starting to boil. But as he still looked at the picture in front of him, the bubbles began to roll until finally spilling over. She was happy, she was laughing, she had friends - she didn’t remember him anymore. The nauseating feeling of being left out hit him in his chest and he felt the sudden urge to heave, to spill his guts right then and there. 

Osamu always called the woman “the one who got away” in regards to Atsumu. In reality, the man let it happen. Too preoccupied in his career, and with little to no balance within his life, he let the relationship fall through his fingers like sand. It wasn’t until nearly a year after, he realized the hollow ache in his chest without her in his life. An emptiness that ate away at him, nipping and biting until there was nothing left - a shell of the man he once was. But as years passed, he started to repress the wretched feelings. Bottled them up and crammed them down within the chasms of his mind, never to be felt again. 

Until now. 

The man put his phone face down on the counter roughly; the sharp snap of the case hitting cold marble made his ears ring in contrast to the quiet apartment. He put his hands to his face and covered his eyes with a loud sigh, shaky as it took up a sense of desperation. The sinking feeling of regret trickled into his mind as he stood there, elbows still against the cool marble and calloused hands over his face, until it completely devoured him. Swallowed him whole, with not a single piece left, and he once again felt alone. 

Completely, and utterly, alone.

“Fuck.”

taglist (open, send an ask)

@causenessus @softpia @renardiererin @kodzu-ken @phoenix-eclipses

@wyrcan @honeekyuu @wakashudou @wolffmaiden @eggyrocks 

@yogurtkags @bakery-anon @totallytatum @mollyrolls @aozui 

@jadeoru @hyunteru @kameyyy @nekozaki @sandwhitches

[biteyoubiteme]

okay okay okay!!

txt vs no nut november! and maybe single / with a partner and regular sex life

like, would / wouldn't participate (and why), how long it would take for them to lose (if lose at all, I look at you taehyun), why they would lose (idek, forgot, were too stressed, too horny, etc)

would there be a member who would be like "I'll cum at 0:01, november the first, and will enjoy the whole month looking at you all suffer, losers"?

ahhhh now I think of requesting yeonkai x reader about nnn...

txt v. no nut november

warnings: 🔞!!! gn!reader, mentions of masturbation/sex, cockwarming, edging, prob forgot some sorry

wc: 0.7k total

an: hiiii @apeachty you're my favorite because you can read my mind on exactly what I want to write next lol I don't know if I got everything you asked for but I hope you enjoy!

[m.list] [1kevent m.list]

taehyun .ᐟ

if you didn't think taehyun was winning I don't know what you're on but it's just known that he would hold out the longest. If he did lose it was because the clocks had just turned to midnight when he finished effectively ending his need to even participate in a game he knows is arbitrary. This does not mean that he doesn't still try because he loves a challenge. Will spend more time in the gym because of it but he will never complain. The guys will make fun of him saying he's not even in the game anymore seeing as he failed first, will actually go on into the first week of December just to prove a point.

beomgyu .ᐟ

Now I don't think beomgyu is very competitive about most things and if he is it's only because of teasing and needing to prove people wrong. But November is his time to shine. He will actively encourage the other’s partners to tease the boys just so that he can ‘win’ the bet. Will make it through the month but the end is an absolute struggle, suddenly he's getting boners left and right like he's a teenager again. The last day of November is the day he breaks. Technically all the other boys have already lost if you look past taehyun going past November. This is his excuse and doesn't even make it through the morning before he's cumming. By the end of the day, he is three orgasms down and doesn't even care about winning the title besides the fact he can joke about it until next year.

yeonjun .ᐟ

He tries so hard and wants to beat beomgyu because he is his only real competition. Actually masturbates a lot and just edges himself because he likes teasing and the ache it gives him. Avoiding his partner as if that will help anything, his imagination is just well enough. Only makes it a little more than halfway through the month before he's given up. He's not able to stay away from his partner and needs them too much to stop himself. Although he tries to just edge himself again, cockwarming only works until he's absentmindedly thrusting, cursing when he accidentally finishes. Just shrugs and goes another round this time without even feeling sorry. 

kai .ᐟ

Doesn't even remember that he's not supposed to be having sex, and doubly doesn't remember not to cum. He lasts a few days max and only because hadn't been near his partner. But as soon as they come near he's a needy mess, begging to get off because he just missed them so much. Remembers the last second about the group chat and the threats of having to pay for everyone's dinner if he's first to lose. Feels like a failure for only a second before shrugging just glad he doesn't have to worry about it anymore. Promises to win next year even if it's the last thing he does.

soobin .ᐟ

Talks big talk about winning but forgets exactly how often he finishes in a month. Will put himself into a bad mood and it's only been a few hours into November 1st. Has to avoid opening certain apps because he knows his feed will be evil and show him exactly what he wants to see but can't use to get him off. Surprises himself by even making it through the day only not really because he's got his hand down his pants only an hour before midnight. Cums multiple times and doesn't even bring it up that he's lost, actually lies about still holding out until he confesses to Kai that he too did not last long at all. “No, it was actually torture, the only thing I could think about was getting off and wondering exactly where you guys would pick to eat and if it would be that crazy to just send my card info in the chat to get it over with,” 

He and Taehyun have a full back-and-forth that lasts longer than it should about who should give their card to the waiter. The very serious debate ends after the laughter from the other boys is so loud people are looking their way. Soobin grumbles as he pays but knows it's only fair because he technically did lose first. He also knows that he was only a minute shy of actually finishing at midnight before the day even started for their competition and would have ended up paying anyway because unlike taehyun he would not have just continued the competition but would have just given up without even trying. 

taglist 🏷: @kissmekissykissme @bts-txt-ateez @apeachty want to be added to the taglist? check out my rules to see how to join! want to be taken off the taglist? send an ask!

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

tw: domestic and parental abuse

i think people underplay how much abuse can affect your worldview sometimes. i'm not just talking about the victims (or at least, the victim who suffered the bulk of the abuse), i'm talking about everyone in that household, especially children.

even if, let's say, a parent is abusive to only one child and is nice to the rest, that doesn't mean this abuse doesn't affect the other children negatively.

for one, it sets a standard that they feel the need to keep up, because the abused child is an "example" and the abuser could turn on the rest of the children at any moment.

secondly, if you've been witnessing this since childhood, you just accept it as normal. you think it's normal for parents to hit their children to "discipline" them or "for their own good". you think it's okay for parents to call their kids worthless or a burden or a waste of space, because that's just what you've been accustomed to. you don't really question it, because you don't know any better.

this is regarding catra stans blaming adora for not protecting catra when she was being abused. which, first of all, adora tried her best, even putting herself in front of catra when shadow weaver was about to hurt her.

secondly, even if adora didn't do that, i wouldn't blame her. she's been seeing this ever since she was an infant. why would she question it if this is the only person close to a parental figure that she's had? how would she know that this isn't what a parent is supposed to act like?

and of course, fans love to forget the fact that adora herself was being emotionally abused by shadow weaver as well. she was a victim too.

it's ridiculous to blame a child for not standing up to her abusive parent when 1. she doesn't know that this is wrong because she's been accustomed to it all her life and 2. SHE'S A CHILD.

"oh adora only cares about random people she just met, she doesn't care about catra" she wouldn't have asked catra to join her if she didn't care. she wouldn't have spent three seasons trying to convince catra to leave her toxic environment.

and how much did catra care about adora? keep in mind, unlike adora, catra knew that the horde was evil and she didn't even mention it to adora, let alone try to do something about it. why is catra allowed to get away with not acting on a problem but adora is villanized for it?

this just further confirms my theory that deep down, c//a stans see catra and adora as sisters. and they expect adora to behave like an older sibling, protecting catra from all harm and essentially becoming her second parent.

[greenheartart]

I'm not very good at this sort of thing. I wasn't sure I wanted to say anything at all, since this has always just been my silly little safe place for loving Undertale. Not a place for other things, especially political stuff. But then it felt weird not to say anything. To just continue on and pretend nothing has happened and everything's okay.

Because it's not.

The fact that Trump has managed to get reelected is horrific. I've spent the last two days oscillating between dread and disbelief and burying myself in games for hours on end, just to try to forget about the world for a while. Hasn't really helped, if I'm being honest. My body hurts from how tense I am and I can't seem to shake the stress headache at the base of my skull. It feels like there's no escape from it. It's everywhere online and when I leave my house, it's still everywhere I go, in campaign signs on lawns and in the conversations I overhear from strangers. All my friends are scared and anxious and angry and frustrated, and none of us know what to do about it.

And I imagine it's the same for many of you.

It's an exhausting thought that so many of us are struggling right now. I hate it, and I'm so sorry we're all going through this.

I guess what I want to say that I know I'm more of a background presence, even on my own blog at times, but if anyone needs someone to reach out to, I'm here. My inbox is open and so are my DMs. If you feel alone and need to talk to someone, or want a distraction from what's going on and want to talk about fandoms or pets or anything else, or hell, have even just wanted to say hi and have needed an excuse, please. Reach out, ask to chat, just say hi. I'll answer.

And I also want to say I'm not going anywhere. Maybe things will take longer for me to get to than I want for mental health reasons, or maybe I'll throw myself even harder into this to cope. Who knows. I just know that I love telling stories and I love making art, and I love getting to share that with all of you and getting to see you love it too. I'm horrified by the world right now, but that just makes me want to push back against the horrors harder in the only way I know how.

Community is important. Art is important. We have to find joy and connection wherever we can, especially when things are at their worst.

So... just take care, everyone. Do whatever you can to keep your head up and don't give into despair. I'll see you around soon. ♥

[lewmagoo]

sending love to those of you seeing atta boy tonight, as well as love to the band because i know for a fact they do not feel like getting up in front of people and trying to be upbeat right now 🥺 i hope everyone is still able to have a great time and forget about everything if only for a brief moment

[itsnothingofinterest]

I’m not gonna lie. I feel pretty sick after seeing the election results. I’m not even American but I’ve always known the ramifications of Trump being in office even outside of his country. If this really isn’t a red mirage, and it’s sadly looking like it’s not, so many people in & outside the US are now in danger that it makes me feel like I’ll throw up.

Women.

Queer people.

Pretty much any racial minority in America.

The environment and effectively the world itself.

Of course we can’t forget Ukraine and Palestine; Putin will soon be allied with the strongest military in the world and getting israel to agree to a ceasefire is looking like a pipe dream. I’ve no doubt the situation in Gaza will get much worse in fact.

Oh and don’t get me started on how he’ll impact the Supreme Court that’ll ingrain all of this for long past his presidency and likely make it much more difficult to get another democrat in office again.

And still more groups he can hurt & areas of life he can screw over for everyone that I don't have it in me to remember right now.

I know defeatism and doomerism doesn’t help, perhaps I'm even being selfish ranting out stuff no one needs to hear right now like this; but as a non-American I’m already feeling pretty powerless. With a red mirage looking unlikely, it feels like our only hope is that Trump’s still too incompetent to be as intentionally bad as he wants to be. A pale silver lining to put bluntly.

…Fuck, it’s like all that stress from 2016 to 2020 is back in full, and it makes me realize just how much we took Biden and Harris for granted. These past 4 years of small improvements & things looking up were honestly nice. I’m going to miss them.

[compassionatereminders]

I think the post about having to survive/not hurting yourself if you are xyz group trend is understandable and common and I know what you mean to communicate, but I also think many of us who are marginalized in the US are starting to dislike these posts. Because it feels like "well I would LIKE to stay alive", it feels as if the primary threat is from ourselves, when in fact it's a very real external threat that is outside my control. And it feels like it puts the responsibility on us to stay alive.

I know you didn't intend this but I wanted to give you a heads-up bc I've seen and heard the same sentiment from others too and I know you mean well.

Imo a better message might be that this is the time for people not to forget the most marginalized in the community and to protect us. That this is the time to put actions to words and for allies to work to ensure that it doesn't just fall on the marginalized to stay alive.

I hope this doesn't come across poorly, everyone's emotional at the moment. I just wanted to give you a heads-up about my honest feelings on that trend of posts

That is a really good point. I will keep this in mind and stop contributing to the understandably frustrating trend of just responding to marginalized Americans distress with even more expectations of personal responsibility/resilience!

[hannibalsbignaturals]

I’m in no way intending to be rude but.. does anyone else find some of the fan art in the Hannibal NBC fandom to be a little uncomfy? I won’t say any names, this isn’t a call out post. But the drawings of Hannibal as a super jacked out dude with a popped button shirt, a very obvious bulge, and Will is super skinny, drowned in Hannibal’s massive shirt, and he is, as one might say, “twink-ified”?

I don’t have a problem with smutty art (though some of it is cringe, I’m not here to yuck somebody’s yum) the problem I have with it is that there are real people behind the character’s that are being drawn, like Mads Mikkelsen and Hugh Dancy, if I was an actor and saw that i would feel a little violated 😅

And I saw a pic of the artist showing Mads Mikkelsen the suggestive fan-art of him as Hannibal they had made, and I couldn’t help but cringe on mad’s behalf. I think these types of things should stay on the internet.. or maybe in your personal private folder, because the NBC character ‘Hannibal’ literally has Mads Mikkelsen’s face, so when I look at extremely smutty fan art of Hannibal.. technically it’s Mads Mikkelsen because he plays the character, right?that’s what makes me uncomfy. And also the poor way that the character’s are being portrayed, Will Graham would never act like that lol! (Looking at you, twink Will Graham)

i just think we can become so absorbed or fixated on a character, project our fantasies onto it, upload it for everyone to see, and forget that their are real people behind these characters. I think it’s a little dehumanising.

Though this is just my personal opinion, my opinion is not fact nor law, nor do I claim it to be truth. absolutely no hate to anybody! If you wanna keep drawing smutty art of character’s, then that’s none of my business.

The reason for this post is because I want to see if I’m the only person who feels this way? And also to remind people to be more.. mindful of what they put out on the internet? Because as I’ve said ten times before already, there are real people behind these character’s, such as the actors who play them.

This is something I’ve only begun thinking about recently, like two days ago haha, does any one else feel the same way?

[nushkiespeaks]

I clearly understand whatever you're talking about. But the thing is, you're talking about an event known as Mahabharat. And there is nothing awkward about it, because none of the wrong doers were spared after all.

Even if we consider Draupadi was saved, the revenge was taken! Sri Krishna had dissed the Pandavas so much for this! Everyone had dissed the court for it!

You're clearly looking at one aspect of Dyut, not the entire one so as to understand. While you're saying that associating the morality of the victim while being in a position of getting sexually assaulted is one thing, yes, but that isn't the entire thing on how Draupadi gets saved, dear. But in my point of view it was Draupadi who had saved herself from the ordeal, but you see what happens next! The Pandavas are angry!

The biggest war of Mahabharat happens to avenge the insult done to Draupadi! This clearly means that sexual assault on anyone shouldn't happen!

I am exactly talking about the way how Draupadi's power had caused to save herself, her courage! There is no link with moral purity! Yes it does form a part, but it isn't entirely of it! Draupadi wasn't an ordinary human being after all, and linking demigods to our lives in Kaliyug is insane at some point I feel.

Surely, in our days such miracles won't be happening we know! But justice happens doesn't it? The same way the entire assault on Draupadi is avenged! And that is what Dharma stands for! Dear, dharma isn't just moral righteousness of a person, it involves every single thing that leads the world to run at its best. I did not talk about Draupadi being morally righteous rather I emphasized on the fact how "Dharma" comes to save Draupadi. And Dharma stands with only who is righteous, regardless of any situation. You cannot separate the two.

You're forgetting the fact that Draupadi's insult was avenged, you're forgetting how Bheem thrashed and tore Dusshasan's arms, gave him such a brutal death for laying hands on Draupadi. In the same way, Keechak is strangled to death also brutally by Bheem.

Where is then sexual assault justified my friend? Where is it tagged violence against woman, sexual assault is glorified?!

Even if for a moment if we consider that Draupadi didn't get help that way, you think that the Pandavas wouldn't have avenged her?

The entire point of Dyut isn't glorification of sexual assault and having a good character will save you, no no! This is clearly a misunderstanding! Rather Draupadi in Dyut, protests against such things! She talks about what rights Yudhishthir had to stake her? Remember no one had supported Yudhishthir' deeds. I am talking about how Draupadi's self restrain and perserverence had saved her, not linking it with how sexual assault happens in today's world. I talked about her mental strength at the position not morality.

Even if you take out the part where Draupadi is magically saved, you cannot ignore the part how the Pandavas fumed day and night, killed Kauravas and Karn brutally for trying to assault their wives.

Infact the entire aspect of Mahabharat actually builds upon the Adharma done upon a woman and what the consequences are!

NO WHERE IN MAHABHARAT SUCH ACTIVITIES IS GLORIFIED! NO WHERE!

And dearest, you're talking about slavery also here. The concept of slavery is VERY DIFFERENT from what we mean in today's context. If you had read Mahabharat, you would've known how the Pandavas and Draupadi treat their servants with utmost respect and dignity. Draupadi infact even remembers the names of her servants (everyone) who worked under her.

And no where slavery is glorified as it is in todays world. There was no thing acutely known as SLAVERY during that time, where they were tortured or meted out inhuman treatment like the SLAVERY which happens in Kaliyug. Vyas clearly mentions how in Yudhishthir's kingdom every human being lived a life of peace and happiness, there were no sorrow, no disease, no immorality because of the power of sacrificial Yagnas that purified the minds.

Pandavas and Draupadi were a standard as to how one should be treating people around. Now you would say it only happened in selective areas, and Draupadi Pandavas are exceptions. Ofcourse they are exceptions 😂😂😂that's the reason Vyas had told us to learn from the Pandavas and not others right?😂 They're glorified and heroes for a reason for they showed us how to treat people and Mahabharat clearly emphasises on it!

No where have been inhuman treatment been glorified! And those who were into it ( for example, Karn ) were brutally punished for their deeds.

That's the reason why one shouldn't cherrypick upon Mahabharat. Read the text and then analyze it. I know reading 6000 pages books isn't an easy task, but atleast try it?

Jumping to conclusions about our ITIHAS is very easy then you should even dare to read as well, COMPLETELY.

Mahabharat and Ramaayan clearly shows what immoral deeds done upon woman can lead you to, and you're questioning that thing only?

This is not as coherent as my usual posts and I'm sorry about that in advance. This is tangentially related to our last post about women in Mahabharat. I saw this post by @nushkiespeaks. I have a lot of thoughts about it but what matters the most in the context of our previous post is that I do not like the use of the phrase "her dharma saves her" in this scenario. I will explain.

TW: violence against women, sexual assault. Please proceed with caution.

(I want to clarify that this is not meant as a call out post or anything. These are just my thoughts about what some feminist analysis of the epic lack sometimes. You can feel free to agree or disagree with me but please be kind and respectful about it and not call people names or harass anyone.)

I love Draupadi as a character so I say the following with all the love in my heart for her:

People usually either praise Draupadi for being a perfect victim. Or denigrate her for not being one. To them, she's either the pure hearted goddess who believed in her personal god and fulfilled her dharma of being a perfect wife. Or she's the cunning woman who didn't perform her dharma properly and deserved what she got.

What gets left behind is that the fact no one should have to go through any of that regardless of whether you believe they performed their dharma correctly. What also gets left behind are: all the other women mentioned in the scene, if only in passing. The slaves.

If you're strictly talking about the BORI CE version of the story(as the post clearly is), while reading it, it's almost impossible to miss the repeated mentions of the normalised and legally sanctioned sexual abuse/harrassment and rape of slaves. (Side note: Yes, slavery was a thing back then. It's horrible. People just don't like to acknowledge the instances in the Mahabharat where slavery is mentioned because it's just not a good look for sacred books to be chill with and actively encouraging buying and selling of actual people like objects. Trust me, if you have a favourite character in the epic, they were probably involved in the practice of slavery somehow, even Krishna, I'm very sorry to tell you this.)

To me, it's odious to mention dharma whenever we talk about Draupadi's vastraharan because it leads the obvious conclusion that those other women mentioned in text suffer at the hands of their "masters", in part because maybe they weren't performing their dharma correctly.

Maybe that's not what people mean when they praise Draupadi for her dharmic perfection. But every time those people, I cannot help but think of those women. The ones that are forgotten.

The ones who were not allowed to save themselves.

I guess, I'm ultimately just trying to say that this post is just my humble request to people to not talk about topics such as sexual assault in terms of the moral character of the victim. The people may mean well, but it does unfortunately perpetuate the idea of a perfect victim.

-Mod S

[sketchyface]

Sweeney Todd AU where Alastor is Sweeney Todd, Vox is Mrs Lovett and Rosie is Lucy Barker

OneWayBroadcast/Radiosilence and Queerplatonic!Radiorose in one AU!

[quietwingsinthesky]

i really do think the desire to paint ten as unambiguously The Worst™️ when it comes to his relationship with martha is out of this desire to uncomplicate their relationship. to decouple them as friends and people who profoundly impacted each other’s lives. it’s just an easier narrative to swallow: that ten was Awful to her and then martha kicked him to the curb when she realized she was too good for him. easier, maybe, then dealing with the troubles of unrequited affection don’t have to be anyone’s fault, or that ten shut martha out in a lot of ways but let her in in others that he wouldn’t let any other companion near, or that they were still friends, they still wanted to see each other and be around each other, even though it was messy and sometimes hurt. you know?